#if you can’t find ANYTHING to do in this fandom that would take a lifetime to finish

[padawansuggest]

Real take: I like Star Wars. I like the prequels because they have more fleshed out world building than the originals. I like the originals because it has a compelling storyline and character building. I like the cartoons because they do things that live action cannot. I like the children’s show Young Jedi Adventures and I think it’s both cute, extremely full of world building, and it’s designed to bring back the cartoon storyline of learning a lesson every episode that young children can relate to. I like the Mandalorian because it took a species with exactly two known people from it, and added a third, but made them a baby, and they were cute, and it shows the morals of Mandalorian adoption and love for children. I love Ahsoka because it took a favorite cartoon series and not only brought it to life, but also it’s funny and very full of world building for both the New Republic Rebellion scene, as well as more Dathomirian nightsister lore. I love a lot of other Star Wars off-shoots because they gave good storylines, they try to bridge plotholes, and a lot of amazing characters and new places to play with. I adore, fucking love, would give my life for Star Wars Visions; the lore and new concepts alone have captivated me and I can and HAVE made posts about things Visions did that no other SW series has touched and I’m so obsessed with the force and it’s aspects as well as just species and such you have no idea I would sell any of you for SW Visions. In fact, I would sell any of you for Young Jedi Adventures too. The worldbuilding alone for those two series is enough to have me vibrating with excitement with every episode. Sometimes I rewatch episodes of them just for random juicy facts that I can use for fics.

But you know why I don’t tell people I like Star Wars in real life? People always lookin at something they hate, and the most incel take on it is that it’s got too many women now. But irl non-fandom people who just want to ‘enjoy the ambiance of the original trilogy’ and me do not get along because they actually hate Star Wars. They genuinely hate Star Wars.

I can give you 50 plot lines in various sections of canon and legends that boiled my blood (tho not that one time Anakin at 12 literally boiled a man’s blood inside his body, that was hilarious his eyes turned black like a demons I’m so obsessed with him), but I’m not gonna talk about those.

Aren’t you exhausted? Wouldn’t it be nicer to gush about how amazing a certain costume design was? How the implications of a certain species makes you so excited you could burst? Wouldn’t you like to talk about how that one character just doesn’t get enough love and it wasn’t because they were fridged it was just because they didn’t get enough love from the fans for being black or female or disabled or something?

I am going to tell you this now, and you’re gonna hate me for it but I’m right: if you didn’t like Mortis because you think the force Doesn’t Work Like That? You don’t like Star Wars.

I’m tired of interacting with comments on commercials because it’s full of idiots crying about more women, a black character, the fact that ‘oh that wouldn’t happen’ as if the High Republic era didn’t literally have some sort of fucked up midichlorian vampire roaming the outer rim killing anyone force sensitive. Obviously they def would have acolytes set before the prequels shove it up your ass.

Anyways. Stop talking about what you hate. Yes, I get it. We are tired of rote pumped stories, but that doesn’t change the fact that there will ALWAYS be someone who hates the story you love, and loves the story you hate. You cannot please everyone, and I for one have found just about all off-shoot SW series individualized and compelling in some way or another.

You know what I did when I starting hating about 90% of all new Marvel movies? I stopped watching them. If I want back in the fandom I have older ones I can watch or simply only interact with fics.

Because Marvel, as much as they Need To Calm Their Shit, isn’t about me, and it isn’t for me anymore.

But I think a lot of you hate so much Star Wars content that you truly need to stop interacting with the series. It’s not for you anymore. And just because you didn’t like it doesn’t mean it’s not real SW. Not sorry, but this ain’t your scene anymore and you need to find a new one.

[constellationandcompendium]

Writeblr Intro

Greetings traveller!

About Me:

She/her, early 30s

PhD graduate working in heritage

British (obsessed with tea)

Also sings and crochets

Enjoys both Star Trek & Star Wars

Occasional NaNoWriMo participant

Fanfic writer of 15 years making the jump into original fiction (find my fandom blog @thetamehistorian)

Happy to take asks / play tag games etc.

Has a habit of designing covers rather than writing

Second attempt at this blog (main blog this time, cha cha real smooth)

Tends To Write / Read

Sci-Fi & Cyberpunk

Urban Fantasy & Fantasy

Historical

Comedy (this suprised me too)

Introducing My WIPS

A crime thriller with a touch of cyberpunk...

Featuring

Man with habit of doing wrong thing for right reason

Best buds to reluctant allies to ‘I would die for you’

That ‘I can’t believe you’ve done this’ meme

Conspiracies and double agents

Lots of angst and hurt (with some comfort)

Wholesome parent / child relationships

Summary

Solaris City has a problem. Whilst the metropolis flourishes, down below in the old mines the Undercity grows wild and dangerous, it’s people cut off from the prosperity above, dreaming of the sun and spreading Haze - an addictive drug.

Elias also has a problem. Working for the Bureau has cleaned his slate but he hasn’t cut all ties with those underground. Now there’s a girl hidden in his flat and something big has been uncovered that has his contacts in a flurry.

With two days to go to a vote on unifying the two halves of the city, and his friend Sebastien caught right in the middle, Elias has a feeling that it'll only take one domino falling for everything to come crashing down.

Work Page

First Draft Complete, If Messy (Mind the Plot Holes)

A sci-fi comedy of a ship of misfits...

Featuring

Puns for ship names (and just bad jokes in general)

Captain packing up the ship and all its crew because they can no longer thrive in this household

Overly social parents (please stop inviting my professor over to dinner)

Space worker unions (and aliens)

Learning self-worth and finding strength through working together

Found family

Summary

The United Earth Ship Archimedes patrols the border of charted space. Beyond it - the vast and unexplored reaches of the universe.

It’s an exciting prospect for Aster Kobor, newly graduated from the fleet academy and hoping to make her mark upon the stars. Unfortunately, it only takes a few weeks for Aster to realise that the Archimedes is nicknamed ‘the screw’ for a reason. It’s a ship for the rejects and misfits, those deemed unfit to serve in the frontier ships and command never lets them do anything exciting. Still, Aster is determined to make the best of it and, unbeknownst to her, her meddling Captain is about to give the crew of the Archimedes their chance to show command what they're made of.

Soon a bad reputation is the least of their troubles and, whether the crew like it or not, they’ll have to learn to survive in deep space - where their only certainty is each other.

Work Page

Currently Wrangling Vibes Into ~ Characters ~ and ~ Plot ~

A historical novel about determined women, trains, and winning a war…

Featuring

One woman’s obsession with the railways

Code breaking commuters

Breakfasts cooked on a coal shovel

Being accidentally adopted by an elderly fireman and driver duo

Occasional air raid for added ~spice~

Solidarity in the face of adversity and outdated systems

Summary

Bea had always been fascinated by the railways, but her dream of driving one of the locomotives always seemed out of reach. Working the trains is dangerous, dirty, and completely off limits to the fairer sex.

Then the war came and the men went off the fight. Answering the call to help, Bea and her fellow railway volunteers find themselves with an opportunity of a lifetime. Obscured from judging eyes by steam and smoke they shadow the veteran drivers and engineers, learning what they can on the job and hitting the library when they can't.

The trains need to run, they are vital to the war effort. All it would take is one rogue bomb, one mishap to take out a driver and the wheels stop spinning.

Or at least, that's what the station manager thinks.

Work Page

Currently Doing Research and Initial Planning!

[ghostssimp]

Can’t Kill A Ghost

Ugh, this sucks, but I'll leave it here. My motivation to write is at zero. There's none of it. Also I'm thinking about writing for other fandoms too, so I can take a little break from COD, because I have no motivation for it.

The mission you went on, got south, so you and Ghost had to run. Terrorists got the information of the two of you being there and you barely got your heads out. You got shot in your shoulder in the action. The two of you got to the nearest safehouse, which was an hour and a half distant away. Good thing Ghost found a motorbike and the two of you rushed away. The pain in your shoulder didn’t help, but you had to hold onto the muscular man, to be close to him as you escaped.

Soon, the two of you reached the safe house. It took a good 40 minutes, but you managed it. When Ghost got off the motorbike, his eyes met yours in a hint of worry. The pain in your shoulder made you feel weak as adrenaline wore out and you felt the pain more and more flowing through you.

He helped you down and, to your surprise, he took you in his arms. Here's the deal, you like your Lieutenant, you like him a lot and moments like this are fatal to you, because you think that there are just seconds away for you to blow up. There were a few times that he looked at you he showed something to you, a little feeling in his eyes that wanted to betray him and show emotion, but he always found an excuse and turned away. You're glad for that. You can't bond. You're not allowed. You can't lose anyone else in your life.

Ghost put you down on a couch and rushed to find first aid. You grimace at the pain and lean a little on your good shoulder. "You know Lt., I can walk. I'm shot in my shoulder, not my leg." He walked back getting everything he needed. "Shut up and take your shirt off." His eyes looked at the wound. "Don't. You can't lift up your arm. I'll cut the fabric." You look at him through your lashes.

"And what will I wear around?" He grumbles under his breath something that you didn't catch and already rips the shirt from your sleeve to your shoulder with, scissors.

"You'll walk around naked." His eyes didn't even look up at you, but were fixed on your wound. The good thing is that, because you didn't know how to react. There were a few minutes of silence as he started to patch you up and you hissed when he put alcohol on your wound.

"I don't think that's appropriate, Lieutenant." He was silent for some time. His breathing was steady and deep, making you concentrate on it instead of the pain and the needle that is now going through your skin. 

He finished and started to bandage you up. "Why do you never call me Ghost?" It took you by surprise, and you flinched at the question. "I uh, I'm keeping it professional." Lame excuse.

"Banshee, give me a proper answer." You glance at him. "Well, this is also a proper one." Your heart is beating. You never called him Ghost. You know his name is Simon Riley. You never said it out loud. It was always Lieutenant or Sir. He was finished and, finally, the two of you locked your eyes. "Thank you Sir." He's staring down at you. He leans over to you, just inches from your ear.

"Banshee. Y/N. Say my name, just once. I want to hear it." Your breath hitched. You've never seen him like this. You've never heard him talk like this. You didn't know how to react.

"I just... I can't sir."

"Tell me why then."

You pull back to look at him. His eyes looked ready for anything that you would say to him. It is full of emotions that you can't read. His hands dipped the couch beneath you as you sat between them. He dominated over you. It made you want to tell him everything. For a second there, you were hesitating.

"Soap is always bugging me. Why did I get called Banshee? Banshee is a mythological being that brings death. Lt. It screams and you know that death is coming. Everytime in my lifetime I sad the nane of a loved one person, they end up dead. I bring death anywhere I go, I am fucking death." His eyes shifted over you. You felt your heart pounding faster with each second you were this close to him.

I died a long time ago, baby. Say my name." his hand found place on your tight, gripping it and giving it a squeeze. Your stomach flipped and heat started to wash over you. His fingers sneaked around and found a way in your trousers. They pushed away panties and he dipped in.

"Say it. Y/N. Say it." a moan escaped your lips as he worked you over. "I can't sir."

He stopped and leaned over your ear, his mask touching your cheek as his raspy voice ringed over.

"You can't kill a ghost."

[wanderfan2000]

The Depression - WanderFan2000′s Side of The Story

Before I get started with this, I need to say for the sake of my viewers. What I’m about to talk about is MY side of this Tumblr drama that’s been going on around here regarding me and my love for the Wander Over Yonder episode, “The Lonely Planet”.  Keep in mind when I first read the post, I felt depression, flabbergasted and shock all take me over. I couldn’t shake it off and it still continues to take me over this morning. So, without further ado, let’s begin with…

“Why do I have depression?” you might ask. Well, I’ll explain…

I was looking at the “Wander Over Yonder” tag like I always do when I came across a post written by a fellow tumblr blogger, it involved a question with highlighted words as I clicked on it, I never thought I’d find myself in the MIDDLE of a Tumblr drama war.

The story in particular was all about my countless obsession with “The Lonely Planet.” It even included pictures of questions I told some other WOY fan about the episode and how I wanted them to draw fan art of the episode. Then I started reading more, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing… 

The blogger was explaining how the lonely planet artwork, the questions, everything related to said episode was basically just a giant huge pot of NSFW content and many other things. I didn’t quite understand it, but once I did, shock and depression took over my body. 

Now that I’ve gotten the backstory out of the way, let me explain MY SIDE of the story…

First of all, everyone should know that I would NEVER in my lifetime do ANYTHING to harm Wander, he’s a character who I love and will love forever. I clearly don’t understand why on earth the Wander fandom wants to go against me, especially after seeing what I have been doing regarding my fan artwork of a sentient talking planet we’ve only seen in ONE episode and especially, the thing about me not giving a hoot about the opinion! 

But there’s no need to attack me or say anything about it. Just because I’m obsessed with an episodes of Wander that involve him getting captured by a lonely, sentient planet who ties him up with plant vines DOESN’T mean that I obsess with these episodes MORE than the entire series. I love the WOY series as a whole, each episode is unique and special in their own way, plus I always get a laugh out of a lot of them.  Now, lemme talk about my art work of Wander and Janet: 

One thing I’d like to point out that whenever I draw Wander and Janet together nowadays, I draw them as Forever Friends. Because I like to think that Janet enjoys loving over Wander as a friend rather than trying to force him to love her. NTM, she has Maurice as her husband now.  Now I understand that a lot of folks aren’t fans of the whole “plant vines tying around Wander’s wrists ofc, many of them aren’t fan of the vines touching his face ether”. In fact, in a deleted storyboard, there was going to be a scene where Wander was completely surrounded by plant vines. It even mentions that the vines were going to be stroking his face. This never made it into the final episode, tho. Thank grop, I can’t even imagine what the fandom would’ve done with THAT. 

But anyway, the plant vines in all my fanart for this episode aren’t stroking Wander at all, they are cuddling him sweetly. (Well, in Janet’s defense.) Because the vines love him just like Janet loves her forever friend. 

Yes, I know it’s a lot to take in, but I wanted to express my feelings for what I do whenever I draw fanart for Janet. 

Listen, guys, I apologize for any convenience that my artwork, questions and screenshots centered around this episode have made you all uncomfortable. But you need to keep in mind that it is still based on the episode with a different twist: Janet is now obsessed with having Wander as her FRIEND, NOT keeping him as her lover. I mean, sure, I draw artwork based on what happened in the actual episode, but it’s fun to draw something different that Janet can obsess with Wander.  The thing is I don’t want you to view me as a bad person, especially someone who you think is obsessive with fetish. But I am NOT OBSESSED WITH ANY OF THAT! I don’t want to draw A N Y T H I N G that could cause a problem in the fandom. 

Also, the artwork that I draw of The Lonely Planet in particular, talking about it, screenshots I share, I keep all of this FRIENDLY! I don’t want them to be viewed as “NSFW” content because I would NEVER do anything to upset you guys out there, you are all my FRIENDS and I LOVE all of you! 

So, please, don’t block me just because of my obsession. I’m a friendly person who wants to love everyone I meet on here. I’m sorry if the thing I did made everyone upset and uncomfortable. I won’t do it again. 

- WanderFan2000 

[underacalicosky]

20 Question Fic Writer Tag

Yayyy! Thanks for tagging me @grapenehifics 😁 And thanks to @ineffable-snowman for tagging me too! ❤️

How many works do you have on ao3?

I only have six Obikin fics on AO3, which isn’t a lot, but I’m hoping to write more! I’ve posted fics for a different fandom that I’m no longer active in, but that was a lifetime ago and I don’t monitor those fics anymore.

2.) What's your ao3 word count? 

AO3 says 107,086. I know that’s not a lot compared to some folks, but it’s more than I thought I’d get to when I started writing again a few months ago.

3.) What fandoms do you write for? 

Right now, only Prequels/Clone Wars Star Wars, and only Obikin because they’ve taken over my brain. And mainly modern AUs, but I have couple ideas that are in the Star Wars universe.

4.) What are your top five fics by kudos?

Cruel Summer (Intern AU) - 175

Edge of Greatness (Figure skating AU) - 132

The Next Model (Top Model AU) - 125

Heartbreak Prince (Same age HS AU) - 70

In Good Hands (Hairstylist AU) - 69

5.) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, I always respond to comments! I try to respond within a few days. But yes, I love comments. I’m grateful that someone would take the time to not only read my fics, but to also leave a note or an emoji or wall of text 😭 so I try to show my appreciation by responding. Sometimes I’ll get a comment that’s really touching and I’ll reread it when I’m having a bad day. I love when I get into little side convos or hearing about headcanons in the comments!

6.) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I’m incapable of writing anything but a happy ending for Obikin. I want so badly for them to find peace and joy together, whether that’s through lots of cuddles and sex or a platonic life-long friendship.

7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them? 😁 I like to end my fics in a way where they’re at a good place, and afterward they run off and have more adventures and I might not know exactly what they’re up to, but I know they’re happy.

8.) Do you get hate on fics?

Not since I’ve written for the SW and Obikin fandom. Everyone here has been wonderful and encouraging and kind of feral in the most amazing way. I can’t tell you how much I love love love the positive vibes.

It wasn’t always like that in my previous fandom and I eventually left. Although, it wasn’t really hate. I started getting comments about how I wasn’t incorporating certain extreme kinks (which I didn’t know how to write), sort of suggesting that what I wrote wasn’t interesting. And there were plenty of writers who did write those kinks so it was a little baffling. I’m a firm believer that everyone should be able to read or write whatever they like without judgment or shame, but it got to the point where my confidence took a huge hit and I wasn’t having fun anymore.

9.) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do write smut! Soft, fluffy, vanilla smut where they look at each other with hearts in their eyes. If my smut were a cake, it would be funfetti.

10.) Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

No, but I like putting them modern AUs so maybe the Top Model fic is kind of a crossover?

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I didn’t realize this was a thing. How do I know if a fic has been stolen?

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?

A couple years after I left my previous fandom, someone reached out and asked if they could translate one of my fics into a different language. It was really heartwarming and humbling to hear that something I wrote resonated with someone enough to make them want to translate it and share it. I said yes, but I’m not sure I ever got the link to the translated version.

13.) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I co-wrote a big bang with another author for my previous fandom. It was a lot of fun and someone made a playlist to go with our fic. We had similar writing styles, to the point that our betas got confused over who wrote which chapters.

14.) What's your all time favorite ship?

Probably Obikin. Their dynamic is so intriguing to me. There’s endless possibilities. Plus, the authors in this fandom are so freaking talented and creative and that fuels my love for them.

15.) What's a WIP you'd like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I don’t have too many WIP at the moment. I only have two that have actual words, the rest are ideas that haven’t solidified yet. But I plan to finish the ones I’ve started writing.

16.) What are your writing strengths?

I’m terrible at self-assessments. I like to think that I can create a feeling of longing or pining. I love a slow burn, especially a friends to lovers type relationship, and that’s where I like to live with the things I write. There’s that phase where they’re both too afraid to tell the other how they feel. But they stare longingly and wonder if the other’s thinking of them too. And maybe there’s miscommunication or an ill-conceived reason for why they can’t be together that leads to some mild angst before they confess their love and fuck all gentle and sweet.

17.) What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing anything that has a complex plot or interwoven side plots. I’m very linear and simplistic. I’m always so impressed when I read something and the plot has been intricately planned and the little details tie together in the end. These are truly talented writers. Like, you should be publishing novels and getting paid. If I had more time and brain space, I’d love to try planning something more complex someday.

18.) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I’m not against it, but I can barely post anything without typos in English so I wouldn’t trust myself to include dialogue in another language.

19.) First fandom you wrote for?

X-files, Mulder/Scully. I didn’t post it to gossamer. I just had it on my computer and was too scared to show it to anyone.

20.) Favorite fic you've ever written?

This is tough, and it’s going to be a long and rambly answer.

Definitely the fics I’ve written for Obikin are my favorites. And if I had to pick one of them, it would probably be Edge of Greatness, only because it was the first thing I posted to AO3 in about 12 years.

I started writing fics again a few months ago as a way to do something for myself because most of my life revolves around taking care of my family. I had the idea in my head for about a month before I finally dusted off my old 2008 Macbook and wrote the whole thing in about three weeks. It was such a freeing feeling to be writing again, but I still had that criticism in my head. At that time, I wasn’t sure I wanted to share it once I finished it, but I also was trying to challenge myself.

I took baby steps. I got a new AO3 account and sat on it for a week before I began uploading the first few chapters. It was exciting and terrifying at the same time. My hands were shaking when I posted the first four chapters knowing that they would be out there in the world. I was convinced that no one would read them and I was okay with that because the goal I set for myself was to post and not care what other people thought. But the next morning I saw that I had kudos and comments and had a nice little cry. Some people, like @grapenehifics left comments in every chapter and I can’t put into words what that meant to me. So I’m not sure that it’s my best fic, but it holds special meaning to me and I’ll always love it for that reason.

I’m tagging anyone who writes fics and wants to share! I love reading these types of responses! ❤️

[mareenavee]

For the Asks to Spread Love, pick and answer 3 that you haven't been asked already! 🧡

Hello again, bri!! Thanks for sending more of these for me! I've really enjoyed catching up on them and thinking through these today!

Fandom Positivity asks from this game here.

10. A popular character you actually really like and why.

I do like me some rare characters most of all lol. My perspective is a bit biased because I love the ones I love and I don't mind if they aren't "popular" per se. (:

LOL -- The obvious answer is Teldryn, right? But I'm gonna talk about

💫Neloth 💫

instead.

I think he's popular to dunk on because he's been a very big pain in the ass in the games for centuries to everyone who will listen to him. I mean, since the events of Morrowind at minimum. (:

Why do I like him? Because of how he's been written by myself and a few friends -- namely @thana-topsy, @paraparadigm (TOOTHPICK!), and @thequeenofthewinter.

I love to see how other people take this character and run with what we're given in text ESPECIALLY considering how ridiculous he is to deal with and his general attitude toward other living things.

For myself, where I write him as a long term friend of Nerevarine!Teldryn Sero, I love to use his character as an opportunity to talk about the struggle of redemption. How does one redeem themselves from a lifetime of difficult choices made to fit into a specific perception? Does this perception eventually end up becoming a core facet of who you are as a person? If that is the case, can you change? Are the consequences of your choices enough to make you irredeemable? Further, can you forgive yourself if change does not come easily or if you return to old behaviors much too easily?

He's a complicated one, I think, especially by the events of Skyrim. He's not exactly estranged from the rest of House Telvanni, but the connection is tenuous and fraught as the House is still, apparently, recovering from the Red Year. In Morrowind it was very much the opposite. There's gotta be a kind of grief to this shift under the uncaring, hyperfocused exterior.

He's annoying, yes, but very interesting to me, and so he's in my fic. And he's actually a huge part of the latter half of the book.

11. Recommend a fic with an unusual/original headcanon or characterisation that you loved.

OH I'm SHOUTING OUT @changelingsandothernonsense's Danger!JOSH (aka Nerevarine Teldryn Sero)'s Nerevar-as-a-parasite situation in Serious Mistakes.

This angry spirit, more or less, lives in the ring and speaks into Teldryn's BRAIN and sometimes drives the entire car, so to speak and I've never ever read anything like it, holy shit. I'm a beta reader for this particular project and I literally cannot yell about it enough.

It's a novelization of the Teldryn Serious mod which was already intriguing, but AH. MY GOODNESS the Nerevar situation.

Let me show you. From chapter 4:

Aren’t you meant to be looking for something? “Oh, you’re still here?” Teldryn rasped, as if saying it out aloud mattered here. You should be thanking me. Teldryn grunted in annoyance, he had a point, he hated it when he was right. His mouth was dry. He wanted to stay where he was. Sleep. You can’t stay here! Get up! Teldryn groaned. Right again – the tide was coming in, if he didn’t find what he was looking for now, then it would be gone by morning. He needed his keys. Was there an Argonian on the beach? He couldn’t remember. His head hurt. He pinched the bridge of his nose, it did little to relieve the pressure. He always overdid it on the magicka, and now he was nauseous.

It's fucking cool, isn't it? (:

19. Give kudos to someone who leaves great comments.

OH GLADLY. Here's where I shout out @polypolymorph!!!

Okay so I could pick out a bunch of comments -- or novel-length responses. Each comment turns into an opportunity for a conversation and I'm always beside myself to hear back from her.

But right now, I'm still grinning ear to ear over, you guessed it. Eyestalks. Eye. Stalks.

(on this project here.)

[axel-skz]

Hearing Chan say he can’t do chans room anymore.

I wanna talk about it.

Not that anyone cares about my opinion (it isn’t all that important either) but I wanna say something.

I never got to sit through a full Channies room. I got there a few times at the beginning and I was so happy.

Id join for like a couple minutes and I had no clue what was going on. But it felt nice you know? Somewhere in the world, there’s a bunch of other stays hunched over their laptops or whatever device while we all watch this goofball make us all feel better.

It was nice.

I couldn’t find it in me to stay more then a few minutes though. I get easily overwhelmed with emotions and Chans just the kind of person to make you feel warm and fluffy in an instant. I couldn’t be there for long because him talking about even the most stupid thing makes me cry (not that what he says is stupid, it’s just that if he talks about even menial stuff, I cry 😭)

I wanted to slowly be able to sit through more and more of the lives. He never saw my comments. I don’t know what kind of a flailing crazy person I’d look like if he ever did.

But now I won’t find out.

I see a lot of people talking about how dramatic they feel for talking about how bad this feels but you should watch the past lives again. He’s been there for us on anything and everything for years. In the darkest moments and otherwise. You shouldn’t feel bad for caring so much.

I don’t think anyone in general should ever feel bad for being a loving person.

I feel like apologising to him about whatever part we might have played in having it get taken away.

This sucks.

So much of what I’m saying is so selfish, I can’t imagine how he must have felt when he found out he had to stop. I imagine He’s the kind of person to be over worked and exhausted and still be there for everyone in any way they needed. This something he loves being taken away too. It sucks even more to think that he might’ve known in the last live he did that he wouldn’t be doing them anymore.

I hope it’s just a temporary thing and he can go right back to doing them.

But if not, Thank you Channie for everything. You talked about a god awful amount of stuff and we have your advice on so many things. For those of us who don’t listen to anyone else because we’re stubborn, we might just listen to you. I hope you’re taking the time you would spend on Channies room, resting or something. I hope you don’t feel bad for not being able to do them anymore.

I’m glad to have been a part of one of the best fandoms while Chans room was still around (I’m not going anywhere lmao, just the sentiment you know? This is very much my lifetime group. I’ll be with yall when we’re all 70 and unable to move off our sofas watching them be like 75 and on stage 🫶🏼)

[errinkmare-fan]

TLDR: I’ve been thinking a lot about ErrorInkMare and I wanted to braindump some of my logistics. None of it is canon, but more based off of retained tropes I’ve absorbed from the fandom overtime. Like Nightmare alone has very different traits depending on who you ask. I just threw some ideas out there is all. Don’t take any of this too seriously. :)

I love ErrInkMare for the sole fact that it’s a dumpster-fire of a ship. Like:

Ink Sans -> literally cannot feel genuine emotion. purely thoughts, which he can make logical responses to with his fake emotion (vials of paint)

Error Sans -> haphephobia which is the fear of touch (I think), where his body will violently glitch out which I would presume is painful or uncomfortable for him to experience against his will.

Nightmare -> not sure where I heard this but in some versions he can’t experience positive emotion so depending on how you view love as an emotion he can only experience the negative feelings that comes with love like pain and loneliness? Or he can’t experience the emotion of love altogether.

Depending on your definition of fanon, since there are an infinite amount of AUs out there with questionable canons all together…

My only conclusion is that leaves us with an aroace, a panromantic demisexual, and a pansexual cupioromantic… at best. (At worst, probably all of them are aro/ace and hate each other which doesn’t give the ship any leverage.)

So this ship only really realistically works under the conditions that it’s a poly queer-platonic type relationship, and Error would be ok with being in a lithromantic relationship where the other two can’t experience romance towards him back.

Likewise, Ink and Nightmare are unable to touch Error. Ink doesn’t even experience sexual attraction. And my headcannon only works of Nightmare is able to experience sexual attraction, which is very possible he doesn’t. Similar situation for Error.

So how would this ship even work then?

Nightmare might like having a sexual relationship with Ink since it doesn’t need to involve romantic feelings or attraction, just the feeling of touch can be more inviting than nothingness. Having intimacy, or the illusion of it, with someone is probably the closest he can get to having a romantic relationship.

So sometimes he has intercourse with Ink, who can’t reciprocate or feel anything for that matter but maybe finds peace of mind that it puts Nightmare at ease a bit.

**Maybe Ink even takes negative emotion vials to give Nightmare something that will bring him joy. Nightmare can feed off the negative emotion of others right? Maybe that’s the one time Nightmare experiences happiness anymore.

Error might have romantic attraction to both of them, very aware that he has a type and it’s romantically unavailable people. They go on dates anyways and NM/Ink will do romantic acts (without touch) for Error because it makes him happy: Gifts, spending time together, words of affirmation, and some acts of service.

Error *can* create mass amounts of destruction, which causes negative emotion, which satisfies Nightmare who can praise Error.

So the whole ship is together for the point of being mutually beneficial. Nightmare gets a good deal from it. Error gets to have a relationship with his crushes who don’t reciprocate but don’t reject his feelings either. Ink… well… I can’t think of a reason it benefits Ink besides him trying a new relationship for the hell of it. Maybe for the experience or maybe because with the dynamic it feels less forced than maybe previous ones. Maybe he wants to get closer to his friends this way, since him and Nightmare have a more sexual platonic relationship anyways.

This ship, made with tender love and care, is not meant for the wary heart.

This is a hill you die on. Features:

*barley working logistics (more technical than a home depo)

*enough angst for several lifetimes

*enemies to lovers x3 plus

* what if error and ink are enemies (protector and destroyer) but comes to a truce through their mutual enemy nightmare. And they form a truce because dream is the real villain to them all, none of them really pursuing true happiness for everyone. And the boyfriends aren’t really part of the star sanses but they aren’t bad guys either, they’re just nightmare’s boyfriends.

*And optionally, depending on your version of fanon, nightmare and ink learn that error has two brothers, geno and fresh. And they aren’t bad guys or star sanses either but they’re in laws with a really stupid dynamic. The list can go on after that depending on who you ship with who.

*one person falls apart it all falls apart

*but despite that it can be cute like Error wants to go on a date with Nightmare and Nightmare gets him chocolate and Error is just taken aback with the gesture and falls harder in love with him which makes Nightmare a little sick with all the positive emotion but he selflessly sucks it up.

*like the appeal is that it’s imperfect. It’s delicate.

*Error needs to be in love with both so they can both balance between his in unrequited love but genuine care. Nightmare gets sick at positive emotion but at least he feels it while Ink can’t feel it at all but sure as hell can act it out for him. They both care for Error but not in a romantic way is what I’m getting at.

*Nightmare gets what he wants from both sides. Genuine emotion from Error and a fabricated selfless effort from Ink.

*these two in turn makes the exchange interesting for Ink.

Ok rant over.

[bookofmirth]

Sorry, but I don’t agree with “TBH I think that Nesta still has work to do because a few actions don't make up for a lifetime of cruelty.”

Mostly on the basis that we don’t know what their history is. We can’t judge her “lifetime” based on 4 chapters of the book. Especially when SJM is so inconsistent about her storylines (like the whole Feyre can’t read thing).

I think your referring mostly to the fact that Nesta needs to atone for what she has said to Feyre, but their relationship is conflicting and far from being abusive.

And I don’t think what Nesta has done up until this point has been “a few actions” she has repeatedly risked her life for her family, and saved Feyre and her unborn child. She went to a high lords meeting and told them that it was because of Feyre that she even lives. She was ready to sacrifice herself in war. And that scene at Feyre’s (almost) deathbed too. I mean, what more actions is needed to “atone”.

And she’s only 24/25 so what lifetime of cruelty does she have under her belt. What can we glean from the few chapters we have been given that Nesta had always been set in this cruelty campaign against Feyre? Certainly not against Elain.

SJM has said that Feyre isn’t perfect and has made mistakes (mistakes that we haven’t seen but exist in their shared past) I don’t see it as fair to suggest that Nesta needs to do more than she already has for Feyre. Short of risking her life and defending her family, what else is there?

Above all, Feyre has said in ACOFAS, Nesta has more than made up for everything and that she’s already forgiven her. So really, it’s certain half of the fandom (and Rhysand) that hasn’t.

I’m genuinely curious, do you think Elain has anything to atone for? Or are her actions enough that she she has balanced the scale?

At the beginning of acotar, the sisters’ relationship was well established. Feyre wasn’t coming home shocked to find Nesta a changed person, so it’s reasonable to assume that her behavior had been going on for long enough that Feyre knew exactly what to expect. It wasn’t a vendetta against feyre specifically, or anyone specifically. It’s how Nesta handled her feelings, which takes me back to my point that Nesta needed to look inward for healing, not point fingers at other people.

I addressed my comment about atoning in another ask but to clarify further - Nesta has done important, useful, helpful things when the shit hit the fan. There is no disputing that. Just to reiterate, in my opinion, the important thing moving forward is that she doesnt resort to pushing people away again (when we know she doesn’t actually want to do that!)

I don’t understand why people keep saying Nesta is 24. Or calling her a girl. That’s a whole ass adult where I come from. Nesta was around 22-23 when the series started. A lot of these issues began much earlier, when she was a teenager, but… she’s still an adult. I don’t think it does her much credit to infantilize her character in order to excuse her behavior. She can vote, and drink, and rent a car in the US. She could be married for a few years, be a parent a couple times over. (You didn’t call her a girl anon, obviously, I’m just commenting on things I’ve seen in the fandom.)

Re: Elain, that’s the difference I was referring to before. Elain doesn’t look to intentionally hurt people with her words or actions, so I wouldn’t talk about her journey in the same way I would Nesta’s. Elain has some accounting to do, which imo she is. She apologized to Feyre already and acknowledged that they should have done more to help her. Your ask actually made me wonder if that’s why she’s doing what she currently does - cooking and serving food at her home, rather than relying on servants to do it. Helping other people rebuild their gardens after the war. Either way, Elain’s story is not going to be about reconciling with how she has behaved towards other people in the way that Nesta’s was. That’s not to say she’s been perfect, but she didn’t go about trying to hurt people. Her journey is different.

[starshipsofstarlord]

Adopting A Wakandan Child With Bucky;

Summary: there is hope for your and Bucky after you are given a harsh truth, and it is a fragile opportunity that you believe and take it rather than allow the chance to pass just like the hardships in your pasts had done

Fandom: Marvel (MCU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: mentions and after affects of sterilisation, angst, adoption, mentions of death and the snap, happy ending, brief aftermath of smut and mention of it, fluff

Word Count: 1044

Masterlist Link

This was seen as just another failure on the path to peace, a large blockade that was making his whole world crumble around him. Tears froze in his eyes as he glared up at the ceiling, still pained by the evidential verdict. He could only take lives from this universe, not bring any into it. And whilst it was something he’d have to accept and could not be reversed, he could not help but mourn his dreams and inability to create them into a reality. It was the only thing he saw when he shut his lids that wasn’t an unforgivable nightmare, and like all people in those, it was dead. Cold and unmovable, it had been planted in its spot and the roots ran deep, composing into a satiated spiral of inner agony. You understood that the fault wasn’t upon Bucky, the blame was all atop of HYDRA and their cruel intentions, and they had not only frozen the man that you loved in cryo, but they had entrapped his hopes of a family permanently, locking the possibility of carrying on the Barnes legacy forever. “I’m sorry.” Bucky whispered, his lips barely moving as he spoke. He was fragile to the point where hearing his own voice maintained a frown to forge itself between his brows, and the only language he could find himself speaking in was apologies, it was the verbal replica of going in circles. “I only wanted to give you a baby.”

Abruptly you sat up, ushering yourself closer to him so that your shoulder brushed up against his vibranium one. “Hey, there are other options. Just because we cannot have one of our own does not mean that we can’t have a family at all. I can only imagine how you’re feeling right now, but never forget that you are enough and more just the way you are, and perhaps long term there’s a good explanation why this isn’t working out in this lifetime. Maybe the next will cut us some mercy and give us a break, but exploring other possibilities surely won’t be able to hurt us any more than we already have been. So what do you say Buck?” Tentatively you stared at your partner, ready to gouge his reaction which was strictly unpredictable. Whilst you knew what you wanted, you wanted an affirmative answer first handedly from your husband because you did not desire to go down this road alone, in fact you’d refuse if his answer was not the one that you sought after. And denying yourself the role of motherhood would be a furious pain that pranged your every part, after the years of rescuing and protecting and baring your life on the line in order to stop people from getting hurt, you wanted someone to be proud to call you their mother and for there to be a person other than Bucky that you’d do literally anything for.

The silence between the two of you dragged more brutally than a tortured body, until he startled you and chose to voice his opinion. “If that’s what you want… then I want that too. I’ve always wanted a fresh start with you doll, and to put something before our jobs. They can call us when we’re needed, but tomorrow I’ll make some calls so that we can borrow the quinjet to go to Wakanda to arrange some things.” Confusion littered your face and Bucky picked up on it, not waiting a moment longer to jump in to explain his mindset. “When the battle we fought there ended, those such as your lovely self weren’t the only ones to have lost people, and not just by the snap. Thanos’ army killed some of the warriors that fought on their homeland and defended it, leaving many children I assume without parents; and whilst I don’t intend to replace a single one, if we’re doing this I want to help them. Their people have already done so much for us, me. And if we could raise them there, where they can continue to learn their true culture, that’d be-“

“Perfect.” Was your immediate reply, amazed by his mindfulness and simultaneously pleased that the pair of you would no longer have to grasp onto straws or pregnancy tests to make your combined future feel valid. And so without further intrusion of negative thought or scheduled discussion, Bucky’s plan went ahead, and T’Challa as well as his sister Shuri were delighted to see the two of you so eager to release the connotations of being avengers and become more. Parents. Even Okoye and Ayo had to smile at the progression. The king had much respect for each of you, and aided in seeing what child wanted you as their guardians. But there was no child; there were children. Four to be exact, two boys and two girls, and their names were Rukei, Matszi, Zura and D’elaa. They liked to climb on Bucky’s vibranium arm and often fought over who’d get lifted, but your husband was the one to remind them that he was more than strong enough for them all to be raised in the air at once. You’d even learnt their mother tongue to the best of your ability so that even though you had been permitted the privilege to live in Wakanda once more, they would never forget where they were from. You loved your family.

[akaashisupremacy]

Fated

Summary: You’re dating your ex-fiancee Gojo again, but your relationship hits a crucial crossroad. Do you stay or do you go?

Gojo Satoru  x reader

Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version

Genre: fluff, angst, exes to friends to lovers   

“You’re hiding something from me.” Gojo Satoru confronts you as you step onto the hallway for spare rooms in Jujutsu Tech.

He is in your way. You try not to get irritated.

“No, I’m not.” you snap. It’s been a long day. You don’t need this. You push him aside and keep walking. Gojo is irritably good at sniffing things out.

He swiftly appears before you again and blocks your way, “What is it?”

“I missed my period.” You stop and cross your arms, “If you really wanna know.”

“Oh.” He mumbles softly. He looks incredulous, as if he is yet to be sure of what he just heard. You walk past him.

“Oh.” he repeats again, eyes widening as the weight of your words dawn. He turns to you.

You leave him standing there, arrested and head to your room. You’re too tired for this.

Gojo watches you enter your room and lie down. He tries to offer you something to eat since you look so pallid under the fluorescent light of the room.

“I’m not hungry. Just sleepy.” you yawn, waving dismissively.

Gojo feels obligated to stay. He looks at you quietly from the door, unable to leave.

“This really isn’t the most opportune of times,” he breathes in, “but are you seeing anyone else?”

“No.” you murmur, “I don’t have the time.”

He walks in to sit beside you, making sure to close the door behind him. You roll over to the other side of the bed away from his gaze.

Gojo knows he is not an easy person to be with. He’s your ex-fiancée for one thing, and he struggles with monogamy for another.

Being able to be intimate with you again was a chance only the gods could’ve intervened. And now that chance is starting to fade. He lies down beside you, his eyes towards the ceiling. At the start of your relationship, it was him who was hesitant. Things are reversed tonight.

“I don’t want to talk. Go away.” you cut in before he says anything, “I’m seeing a doctor soon to make sure.”

He nods understandingly and quietly, but slowly pads out of the room. The weight of the floor lightly creaks under his footsteps. The silence between the two of you dominates the hall.

————————————————————————————

There was a time when you were younger that you would visit Gojo in his family home. After dinner, you’d sneak outside to his family garden to capture fireflies in paper lanterns.

That was a much different time of course. Since then, you’ve been arranged to be married, broken up and begun precariously seeing each other again after ten years.

“Why are you wading around in the darkness?” he asks, sitting on a pile of rocks, his hands inside his pockets.

Neither of you are really kids anymore, but your fondness for fireflies remains. On your occasional stays in Jujutsu Tech for your sorcery job, you like to spend your down time in the gardens at night.

“I need a break from people.” you comment succinctly.

You’re both quiet from a moment. Gojo becomes too impatient for you to start the conversation.

“So what did the doctor say?” Curiosity overcame him.

You lower your lantern by your side, making sure to face away from him as you reply, “She tried to ask if I was married and if my family knew.”

You turn around quickly, waving your hands before he can react, “You don’t need to worry. I’m considering not keeping it...it’s too much time and work…and it made me think about us. I think we should just end things…whatever this is.”

Gojo knew that this day would come. Deep down, he already prepared himself for when your relationship would end. Yet instead of acceptance, indignance rises in his chest.

“How could you let me go so easily? How are you done with us?” he finds himself saying.

He knew his disinterest in monogamy would come to bite him back someday, but he hadn’t imagined himself in a deeply romantic and emotional relationship with you when it happened.

You shake your head. The sounds of crickets and cicadas keep the silences from being too empty.

“Every year I used to wait to see if this was the year we reconciled. If this was the year we would fix things, not necessarily be lovers, but to just be back in each other's lives.” You look to the stars, sitting in a large rock beside him, “I waited maybe 11 years to see it happen even if I didn’t know if it would come at all. And I can wait another lifetime to try again. But I think in this life, our time has to end. This isn’t going to work out, Satoru.”

Gojo feels as if his lungs will collapse. It hurts him even more to know that you do love him but you’d rather he be out of your life.

“Why would you wait another lifetime for me when I’m here now?” he murmurs.

“I can’t have you to myself.” you say simply, “I can’t take this anymore. Even if I’m not pregnant, I want to be the only one in your life.”

“You are the most important person in my life.” he grabs your hand to reassure you. You don’t resist.

You face him, tears running down your eyes, “Then I don’t understand how you can say that and still need someone else.”

Gojo feels his chest crushed with heaviness. The weight spreads to his back, his arms and neck. For the first time in years, he feels helpless.

“We knew this was coming.” you mutter, pulling your hand away to make your exit out of the garden.

Gojo does not chase after you. He notices his bandages are wet.

————————————————————————

Gojo walks around in a daze for the next few days. People always say that he is a man who has everything, but for now he is the man with only questions without answers.

How can he make you stay?

“Gojo,” Utahime nudge, “GOJO!”

She sharply jabs a finger by his side to bring him back to reality. He jerks back, accidentally hitting the wooden walls of the hallway with a resounding thud.

“Are you even listening to me?” she hisses. He hasn’t been paying attention at the school meeting and her temper is rising. How can he go around doing the bare minimum and still be so praised. She was ready to throw a fit.

“Well…we’re kind of expecting…but we might not keep the baby…and ahh…” he uses his full concentration to string together his thoughts.

Utahime stops in her tracks and rubs her temples. Every other conversation she has with him always sends her reeling.

She crosses her arms together, “Let me guess, one of you wants to keep the kid and the other doesn’t?”

“OMIGOSH YES!” Gojo raises his hands as if someone finally gets him, “How did you know?!”

Utahime looks slightly alarmed at his expression. Protective of your privacy, she looks left and right to see if anybody is nearby. She shrugs.

Gojo continues, “These past few days have made me realize how badly I want a family with them. I really want this! Except it made them realize they want a family with someone else…and I’m not sure there’s anything I can do to make them feel the same way.”

His voice softens towards the end of his sentence as he slowly sinks back into his thoughts.

Utahime takes a moment before dispensing her bit of wisdom.

“Having a child with someone is an incredibly huge sacrifice. If you really want this…then you have to make a sacrifice equal in weight. Whatever that will be…” she sighs, adjusting her kimono. “And I have a feeling you haven’t properly explained to her what an open relationship is.”

She peers at him from the side of her eye. His guilty expression confirms her suspicions.

Every now and then, Utahime feels envious of his power. However, today is not one of those days. He has some hard choices to face she would not want to deal with.

—————————————————————— “Hey!”

A week after your last conversation, Gojo spots you in the school and immediately rushes towards you.

In panic, you shove yourself into an empty meeting room and try to shut the door. He jams his foot between the ledge and determinedly peers you from the door crack.

“Oh no, you are not shutting me out. We are going to talk like proper adults.” he insists.

Your instincts kick in. You kick his feet and push him back. You bolt the door shut and slump down behind it. You’re safe for now.

“You can’t keep running away.” he breathes out from the other side, “We need to talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you quickly rebut, “Gojo, I have no family. There’s no one to help me. I’m going to be alone if this kid comes out of me.”

Your voice fades hoarsely as you utter the last few words.

“You have me.” his soothes in a contemplative voice.

You want to laugh. This relationship was doomed from the start. You were such a masochist for even trying. You must have been consumed with your attraction to him.

Gojo was no different though— he couldn’t help himself. You both want each other too much and now you both were paying the price.

You shake your head, “You’ll just leave me when things get tough. I’m tired of cleaning after your mess. Why can’t you just let me have my way?”

Gojo has no time to be taken aback.

“Because I don’t want a family with anyone else. I’m desperate to make this work with you.” he pleads, “ Don’t push me away. I have my own doubts about myself, and I understand where you’re coming from but I wish you believed in me more.”

You pretend not to hear him.

“I’ll be here for you and our baby, even if it's not always romantic.” he adds, his voice pleading, “I know you’re terrified that I’ll just leave you but…”

You interrupt him by opening the door. As if on instinct he hides his vulnerability from you. His posture leans back coolly, waiting on your next move.

“Gojo, I’m just frustrated to always be at the mercy of your choices. Don’t you understand?”

His lips part slowly, “If you’re not ready for a family, it’s fine. But don't you want to make this last longer?”

——————————————————

“Oh, Satoru, what have we done?” you quietly murmur, staring at the ceiling of his room.

It’s your first night in his faculty dormitory. You’ve never really been before. His room is too close to the principal’s for a casual date night visit.

Gojo’s long switched off the lights but neither of you can sleep.

“What do you mean? The baby or the wedding?” he chuckles.

You shrug, “Both?”

You shift around the sheets, the linen ruffling under your movement.

He crosses his arms and turns to you, “Well, we’ve established that the first one was an accident. The wedding—well—it’s mostly so you and the baby will be under the protection of the Gojo clan.”

Gojo promised to close his open relationship status until your kid is one and you take his word for it. It is perplexing that the wedding was his idea too. However there was something about his sincerity that you could not refuse

“How long till we regret all this?” you half-murmur, half-sigh.

“Honestly, probably every time we hit a rough patch. But we’re not meant to always be happy anyways.” he sighs lying on his arm. It’s an honest enough answer.

You sit up and put your arms around your waist, “Such optimism you have there. So tell me, oh all powerful Satoru, why are we here then?”

“For me, it's to be able to find and meet you.” he says simply.

He catches you off guard with the tenderness of his words. You reach out to touch the side of his face and gently rub your thumb on his cheek. He presses your hand on his cheek.

“If things fell apart again and you had to wait another ten years for us to fix it, would you?”

He asks so quietly you almost don’t hear him.

Your face flushes under the cover of darkness.

“…Yes, I love you too much. This was never going to be just an arranged marriage for me even when we were younger…then again, I think you already know that.” you admit in a shaky whisper.

Now that you've married him, you've given yourself permission acknowledge your true feelings to yourself. You have always been in love with him. And being apart did not changed that.

Propping himself up by the elbow, you realize his face is so close to yours. You can almost feel the wisps of his long lashes on your cheek.

“I know this isn’t your ideal wedding, but this is more than just a shotgun marriage for me too. You are my fated. And you are the only being I want to go through this with—sorcerer, curse or otherwise.”

You try not to giggle at the mention of curses.

“Through this life and the next?” you said with a small smile.

“Through this life and the next.” he assures firmly, squeezing your hand.

You smile widely and he looks at you fondly. These are your favorite moments with him, when you’re at the brink of losing each other in your gazes.

Gojo breaks your shared reverie.

“Can you kiss me?” he grins cheekily, “As your new husband…”

You kiss his forehead without skipping a beat. He flips over, still propping himself by his stomach.

“So what shall we do on our wedding night? Try for twins?” he smirks.

You roll your eyes extra hard to make sure he sees it. Gojo only laughs.

He shuffles out of bed and tosses you your coat, “Well if you really can’t sleep, we might as well go out and see the fireflies. They look bright tonight.”

You put on your coat and smile.

Another lifetime is too far away.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. Check out the other parts!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8 

A/N: When I first wrote the original four chapters, I had already know that this was how the series would end (even though I didn't plan to write it all the way here). I don't know if I will continue writing. I have some extra material, but I don't really know if I'd like to write it out. If I ever make up my mind to do so, you will see me pop up in your notifs. 

If not, I guess this is the end. if you've gone through all 8 chapters, thank you for joining me in this wild, heartfelt ride! Comment or message to be added to the taglist! Or write down some comments about your feelsssss

Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel@samkysnks@herownescape@cherrianne192@shamelessdonutsludgebanana@kageyamakock@shirostrbl@luvang3l@cloudsinthecosmos@httpjungoo @saturnki  @itstheee-ha-chan@gucci-froggy@soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri @fiona782 @a--nonymousse @naturakaashi

If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!

[reidsmemory]

No Regrets

Spencer Reid

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary: A dinner at Rossi’s has Spencer questioned by his teammates about his feeling towards you

Genre: Fluff

not my gif!

     Working at the BAU was hard. Constant flights around the country, seeing families that had lost so much, and of course having to deal with the sick minds of those who allowed your job to be possible. There were good sides to it as well; having a second family, friendships that would last a lifetime and more, as well as reuniting and saving innocent people. 

     Today was one of the good days. It was a local case and the team had caught the killer in less than two days due to the profile and him being just about the most unorganized killer their was. To celebrate, Rossi had offered to host a nice dinner at his and no one on the team passed up the chance to go over there. 

     You arrived a few hours after the case had wrapped up as you had gone home to take a shower and get ready. You had arrived in a flowy, black dress and some black sandals to match with your hair straightened as well as having little gold hoop earrings hanging from your ears. 

     You got out of your car and walked over to the front door of your colleagues house as you rang the door bell and waited for it to open.

     “Y/N, come on in,” Rossi swung open the door and ushered you to come through the doorway. “ Did you get home okay?” he asked as we walked to the kitchen.

     “Yeah, traffic wasn’t too bad,” you smiled as your other co-workers came into sight. 

     “Princess! You look stunning,” Derek called as he opened his arms, signalling for a hug. 

     “Not too bad yourself, D,” you hugged him tightly as he chuckled a bit. With an arm still around your shoulder you pulled back and greeted everyone else with a warm smile. JJ and Will as well as Henry were sitting at the other side of the island than you and Derek. Emily was standing next to Rossi as he as teaching her something about the food you all would be eating tonight. Hotch, Penny, and Reid had yet to arrive. 

     “Drink?” Derek asked as you nodded and he handed you a glass of water. 

     “So, no Savannah?” you asked as he shook his head.

     “She’s got a shift at the hospital tonight,” he told you, “leaving me all alone tonight.” 

     You laughed at his statement, “I think it’s payback for all the night we were out of town.” He hummed and took a swig of his beer. The chiming of the doorbell rang through the house as you looked to Rossi, “I’ve got it,” he nodded at your statement as you put down your glass and started walking towards the door.

     You opened it to find Penny in a bright pink dress with a yellow and green shall as well as some purple heels. “Am I late?” she asked before hugging you tightly. 

     “Not at all,” you said as you both turned to see Hotch’s car pull up, “looks like Spence is the last one to arrive.” Penelope nodded as you saw Hotch and Jack come towards the house. “Go ahead, I’ll wait for them,” you told the blonde as she nodded and went inside.

     Hotch spotted you by the door and pointed to Jack as his eyes lit up as he began running towards you. “Y/N!” he exclaimed as he jumped into your arms.

     “Hello, mister! You look amazing!” you said as he giggled and hid his face in your neck. “Hey, Boss,” you said as Hotch gave you a side hug.

     “I’m pretty sure Jack likes you more than he does me,” Hotch told you as you went into the house. You smiled at him as Jack had taken a fascination towards your earrings. “What’s Rossi cooking up?” 

     “As far as I can tell, something that smells really good.” Hotch chuckled as you came to the kitchen and everyone turned their attention towards the three of you. Everyone began conversing again as you walked over to Derek with Jack still attached to your hip.

     “Let’s move over to the couch, yeah?” Derek said as you nodded and went to the joint living room. You put Jack down on the couch as Derek followed and soon JJ, Will, and Henry. Smiling as Henry began to share his action figures with Jack as both boys urged you to play with them. 

     “You can be Wonder Woman,” Henry handed you action figure.

     “Can I be Spider-Man?” Jack asked as Henry nodded and handed him the action figure.

     “I’ll be Batman!” the boys began to play as you joined and supervised as well seeing as Derek, Will, and JJ had been talking about something that wasn’t as interesting to you as playing with the boys. In fact the sound of the doorbell went over your head as you played with the two boys. 

     “Oh no! Poison Ivy is spreading her vines all over the city!” Jack cried as all of you got to work on defeating the villain. 

     Spencer had come in and immediately saw you on the carpet playing with the boys as his heart swelled. Spencer had always had a crush on you, from the first day you joined the BAU. With the both of you being the youngest on the team as well as your love for reading, the two of you had become very close which only fueled Reid’s feelings for you even further. 

     Seeing you play with the boys was an image he was unable to tear his eyes away from as Morgan quickly caught on. 

     “Hey, Pretty Boy,” Derek called as Spencer whipped his head around.

     “What?”  

     “Ask her out.” Spencer’s cheeks flushed bright pink at this statement. “And don’t give me that ‘I don’t like her like that’ crap because I will profile you so much, boy.”

     Spencer sat next to Morgan, “you can’t tell her.” Derek grinned as Spencer looked at him, “i’m serious. I can’t ruin our relationship!” he whispered.

     “Come on! She likes you too!”

     “No way,” Spencer said, “I can’t risk it, Morgan. She’s too important to me.” Derek sighed as he looked at his friend. 

     “I’m just saying, Kid. If you don’t ask her, you are going to regret it.” Derek was interrupted as both boys finally looked up and saw Spencer. 

      “Spencer!” they both said as they set down the toys and ran towards the tall man. You had also looked up and met eyes with Spencer as you smiled brightly at the man and began to make your way over to him as well.

     “Hey guys!” Spencer said as he gave both the kids a hug as they smiled at the man. You walked over and Spencer opened his arms as you hugged him tightly, “hey, Y/N.”

     “Hi, Spence,” you pulled away and as you were about to tell him about the upcoming movie marathon that would interest the both of you, Emily had called you over to taste test something her and Rossi had been working on. 

     Derek looked at Spencer with a wide grin as the brown haired man blushed. “I’m serious, man. Anyone would be lucky to have a girl like Y/N and you’ve got a pretty good shot of being that anyone.” Derek handed Reid a beer as the doctor took a long drink which surprised the man next to him. 

     “Dinner is served!” Rossi called as everyone gathered around the kitchen. This was going to be a long night.

***

     Spencer had about 4 beers between the time he arrived and now, which was 2 and half hours later and if you knew anything about Spencer Reid then you would know he is a lightweight. Rossi had cooked up something delicious as the team had conversed over dinner and Spencer had his eyes trained on you the entire time as well as making conversation about any and everything.

     Everyone had moved outside and were now on Rossi’s deck as Hotch, JJ, and Will played with the kids, Emily and Penelope conversed about scheduling another girls day in the near future, and Rossi and Morgan talking about an old case that had still rattled their brains. 

     Spencer and you leaned over the railing of the deck as you watched the stars. “Did you know that Venus will be shining it’s brightest on April 28th, which is only a couple of week from now,” he informed you as you nodded and listened wholeheartedly. 

     “We should star gaze that night, maybe Whitmore Park. Bring blankets and just lay out and watch the night sky,” you turned to him as his doe eyes watched you, “what do you think?” 

     “Definitely,” he said immediately as a smile made it’s way to your face as he mirrored it. “Y/N?” you raised your eyebrows and hummed, signaling for him to go on. “Why do you want to do all those things with me? The movie marathons, the star gazing, chess on the plane?”

     You looked at him with a small frown on your face, “because you’re my best friend. What do you mean, Spence?”

     “Best friend,” he repeated. 

     “That’s what I said. Are you feeling okay?” you asked as he just stared at you.

     “Just friends right,” he whispered to himself as you furrowed your eyebrows, “why can’t I be something more?” This time he looked at you, but was still speaking softly as to not attract any attention. 

     “Do you want to be something more?” you spoke even quieter. 

     He nodded his head at your word he set his drink down. “I’m super drunk right now, but I think it’s a good thing because I want you to know and I definitely won’t have this much courage when i’m sober. So, will you go out with me?”

     He looked at you, waiting for his answer, but to no avail, your face was emotionless as he mentally screamed at himself. His screams were cut short.

     You placed a hand on his cheek and pulled him towards you for a kiss. You lips melted together as you smiling into the kiss as he put both his hand on the sides of your face, cradling it softly.

     You pulled away as you saw a bright smile on his face and wide twinkling eyes. “I would like that very much, Doc,” you told him as you rested your head on his chest as he wrapped an arm around you. 

     The stars shining brighter than ever. 

[mhevarujta]

Zoya and the Darkling [Rule of Wolves Spoilers]

It’s a pity that fandoms mostly focus on romantic/sexual relationships, because The Darkling and Zoya have one of the most epic dynamics in the Grishaverse. The way they affect each other is so complex.

Zoya did not go to the Little Palace after being tested in the usual manner of Grisha travelling across Ravka to recruit children with powers. She was a young girl, a child really, living with a bitter and broken mother, in a home where her Suli inheritance was not appreciated, in a country that would condemn her both because of the power she let her demonstrated AND because of who she would have been without it. She was basically sold as a child-bride and her mother deluded herself into thinking that her daughter would not be raped by the old man she was marrying so that she’d feel better about herself, not to mention that she poisoned Zoya with her fears and made her afraid of her own heart. At the wedding her power broke loose and her aunt took her to a hard journey to the Little Palace so that Zoya would be tested and have a chance at a better life.

Zoya was taken in and she was separated from her family, but her aunt was ALWAYS in her heart. She started training and she was stronger than most, she was also driven and resilient. She arrived at the Little Palace when she was 8-9. When she was 13, she was the youngest one to be chosen as part of a group that would travel with the Darkling to Tsibeya to find the white tigers of Ilmisk because one of them was supposed to be an amplifier. By that age, Zoya was half in love with him already and she lived for his rare appearances at the school. She was the best, she had fought to be so, and he wanted him to see it. The Grisha were focused on hunting the female tiger, but the amplifier was a male one. He tried to kill the female’s cubs and Zoya gave them the protection of her body, she got scars that she never had tailored and she almost died, and killed the tiger to defend the cubs; not for the sake of power.

It wasn’t HER turn to get the amplifier, but since she killed the tiger only she could claim it. And THIS brilliant scene happens:

Some part of me always feared that he would send me away, banish me forever from the Little Palace. I told him I was sorry.

“But the Darkling saw me clearly even then. ‘Is that really what you wish to say?’ he asked.”

Zoya pushed a dark strand of her hair behind her ear. “So I told him the truth. I put my chin up and said, ‘They can all hang. It was my blood in the snow.’”

Nikolai stifled a laugh and a smile played over Zoya’s lips. It dwindled almost instantly, replaced by a troubled frown. “That pleased him. He told me it was a job well done. And then he said … ‘Beware of power, Zoya. There is no amount of it that can make them love you.’”

The weight of the words settled over Nikolai. Is that what we’re all searching for? Was that what he’d hunted in all those library books? In his restless travels? In his endless pursuit to seize and then keep the throne? “Was it love you wanted, Zoya?”

She shook her head slowly. “I don’t think so. I wanted … strength. Safety. I never wanted to feel helpless again.”

  “Like calls to like” fits the Darkling and Alina, but it also fits Zoya and the Darkling… in fact it fits Zoya and Aleksander even more so. Both were powerful and KNEW it. Both eventually learned to be unapologetic about it and saw it as their safety net. Both were taught that power would give them safety, survival, fulfillment in some ways, but not love. And yet, as much as they denied it and hid their hearts they DID want to be loved more than anything.

Zoya only rises thereafter. She gets her rank, she is one of the most valued Grisha in the Little Palace, she is admired for her strength and beauty, she armors herself with arrogance, and ruthlessness. But she has not friends. Both her and the Darkling are surrounded by people, they are admired, but they don’t have people close to their heart. The Darkling always cared about Baghra as much as he could still manage and Zoya cared only bout Liliyana and Lada (an orphan girl that her aunt had taken in).

The Darkling SAW her. He saw how she tried like no other, he saw her pain, her anger and he considered these to be things that he could use to control her and to push her towards the direction he desired. And despite not being appreciative of her devotion when he had it, he missed it when it was gone.

When Alina got in the picture everything changed for Zoya. Yes, Zoya had feelings for the Darkling and I DO believe that her feelings and vanity would have been hurt to some extent by the intimacy in the way he approached Alina, but the primary problem was Zoya’s sense of injustice. Zoya had tried for YEARS, had trained hard, had sacrificed to be where she is. Alina never asked for any of it, but from Zoya’s perspective Alina would have been an untrained Grisha who got all the status, power and recognition that SHE had fought for without even trying. Until then, Zoya had been praised for wanting power, but when her anger is not convenient anymore, the Darkling punishes her for it and does not have a second thought about her.

And yet she remained loyal as always.

Even more so than rank, the Darkling and Liliyana were Zoya’s safety-net. And in ONE MOMENT, by genociding Novokribirsk, Zoya’s own mentor, the one who gave her safety and who was meant to create a haven for the Grisha, a person who KNEW her and who KNEW that she had family there, showed that he had no care for her, not care for human life and she wiped out the last people that Zoya loved.

He left her broken inside. In Siege and Storm, Zoya was at her lowest. She has to plead to Alina to have a position in the second army and she has to reveal a part of her heart; not just her loss of Liliyana. Her voice BREAKS when she says that the Darkling could have warned her of his plan; her pain at the idea that he did not give a crap about taking EVERYTHING from her is raw and cutting.

But she is not a quitter. She adjusts, she pulls her pieces together fast, she is a warrior and she stays on the right side without a question.

Then the Darkling attacked the very Grisha he was supposedly fighting for and killed half the people that Zoya had EVER KNOWN. And she still keeps fighting.

 Enter Rule of Wolves. There is SUCH DEEP IRONY in this book and the way Zoya and the Darkling’s arcs interconnect is a prime example of Leigh’s amazing writing.

The Darkling had told Zoya that they would change the world and he completely stopped paying attention to her the moment the potential of Alina’s power blinded him to anything else. And yet, when he returns Zoya has gained the kind of power that could eventually rival his own. But he STILL thinks that he should be the one to rule Ravka. He still thinks that he is the best option for the country. And once more, he criminally underestimates Zoya and overestimates himself.

Who else is vengeful and afraid of his own heart, I wonder…

Aleksander considered Zoya weak for the very same things that were his own fatal flaws.

But unlike him, Zoya SAW her flaws. The Darkling shut himself off more and more in order to save himself from pain. Zoya eventually opened up her heart to grief and pain to become the person her country needed and to embrace her power. She opened the door, when the Darkling did not manage to do so. She showed more courage than he did… and he SAW it.

Aleksander hoped to become the savior during the battle, he wished to demonstrate how only HE could save Ravka. But seeing Nikolai and Zoya defending the country is the first time it registers that there are others who are up to the task and who may be better suited than he is.

And he becomes essential in Zoya being accepted as a saint and in her rise to power partly because he wants to gain her favor but also because he finally sees all her potential, all she can achieve, how a Grisha queen of such power might give the Grisha the haven they need, when he clearly can’t.

And what is left for him to do? What does he want? He wants to serve the country he loves in a way that will affirm his sense of self-importance (he wants to offer something that no one else can) and he wants to be loved. So his new objective is to stop the blight.

The blight was created because of his own power. This man who hunted down and ruined the life of a young girl (Alina) in order to force her to be his balance, so that he could freely use his power in a very imbalanced way, finally realizes that HE is responsible for his power and that HE can be the only one to balance it and himself. So there is a new path he sees ahead of him: he can sacrifice himself to stop the blight and in the process Ravka might finally see that he always wanted to protect the country… and it might love him back. He KNOWS that he has committed crimes, he does not seek redemption, but he desired for all he has done to matter. And it can’t matter if he is not at all responsible for its country’s well-being and if everyone hates him. He has lived so many lifetimes without happiness or fulfillment and they would all have been wasted.

But he can’t achieve this by himself. This man who always thought that he could do things alone, and who took away everything Zoya had fought for, NEEDS her allowance for his centuries-long life to gain a scrap of meaning. He needs her allowance to be appreciated and loved.

I can’t be the only one who sees what a beautiful twist of fate this is.

At the same time Zoya herself understands the Darkling. She understands how anger and using power as a coping mechanism can corrupt. Knowing herself and seeing how he turned out are essential in her becoming a good ruler. He is the cautionary tale of what she could but will never allow herself to become.

When he explains his plan, she KNOWS that he’ll be in eternal pain and she has does not mind that his will be his fate. But when she sees the aftermath of his sacrifice and when she feels the kind of pain he’ll be experiencing for eternity, it leaves her shaken. She feels that pain in her own heart and this is not a fate that she wishes even on him. Genya and Alina are very much willing to let him rot but Zoya, who also believed that she could forgive him, feels that she has to.The Darkling has not redeem himself. He is doing penance. But as Genya mentions, there’s a fine line when one has to do the math of how much a person has to pay and of how much pain they have to feel before their punishment stops being just and they become victims instead. Zoya, being afraid of becoming him, knows that learning to show forgiveness is the only way forward, it’s the way for her to keep her heart open and not become the avalanche.

Zoya Nazyalensky has become everything that Aleksander Morozova, the lost boy, wished to be. Poweful, eternal, with friends, with a true partner, holding the best position a Grisha could imagine without forcing her rule and finally giving their people a true chance without comprominsing them. 

The Darkling was hoping that Alina would have been his balance. We are told how she might make him a better man and she might make him a monster.

But at the end of the day it’s Zoya who allows the Darkling to become the closest thing to decent that he can be at this point.

It’s the Darkling’s life that allows Zoya to see the lines that she will not cross and how to not become a monster.

And it’s Zoya’s ability to forgive him and her willingness to save him that becomes the backbone for the next phase of the Grishaverse, whenever Leigh decides to write it.

The way their paths entangle will always be at the core of the story.

_______________________

@myfriendscallmeraba​ I’m tagging you because you asked for it. It’s very encouraging to have someone interested in my ramblings.

[jodibodie]

I Have Some Feelings

To start let me just emphasize how much I love and adore this show and always will. This was my covid show. Both of my kids loved “Lucifer” and always said I should watch so at the start of covid I binged it and when I say binged, I mean all 4 seasons in a few days and have rewatched so many times I’ve lost count. I think it is timeless, engrossing, original and all around amazing. The writing and the cast were all excellent. The writing was smart and consistently strong and that is so rare.  Funny, sad, poignant, it hit all the notes with very few plot holes or missteps. There is not one episode in the entire series that was not engaging. Even if I didn’t like an episode, it was still well done. What a rarity.

The cast is scary good. Completely underrated. Just all phenomenally talented.  I don’t remember the last time a cast was this strong.  From the core group to both reoccurring and guest stars, the cast was just fantastic.  

Tom Ellis, no words.  The man deserves to choose whatever he wants to do acting wise. He should have people breaking down his door. He can truly do it all and do it all well. He took a character that if portrayed by a lesser actor could have come off as a complete asshole and made him one of the most sympathetic and loveable characters in recent history. Ellis made a crime solving devil, a promiscuous man-child that occasionally breaks into song and the evidence room into a beloved character that has become an icon.  

Lauren German, WOW.  She is just so damn good. She can break your heart one second and have you laughing the next. She makes Chloe real, and people don’t realize how hard that is. Chloe is smart, kind, tough and gorgeous but she’s also an insecure dork.  She’s us and German just brings it.  

DB Woodside I’ve loved since “Buffy”.  He is a phenomenal actor and who knew he could bring the laughs so well? His expressions were classic. Clueless angel indeed. Amenadiel could have been very one-dimensional but because of Woodside’s talent he became fully fleshed out and full bodied.  

I have no doubt Lesley-Ann Brandt has a huge career in front of her.  She took a character that very well could have been hated, a demon and made her into one of the most human characters on the show. Kudos to her for taking a tough role and making it her own.  

Kevin Alejandro is another actor I’ve loved for a long time.  He also took a character who if we’re going to be honest here did so many unlikeable things that he should have been truly despised but because of Kevin’s portrayal he was beloved. Great actor and a terrific director.

Rachael Harris IMO is the downlow MVP.  She was literally the rock and again, with a lesser actress the role could have been a throwaway. The normal human, the sounding board but Harris imbued her with so much more.  Her spit takes, sarcasm and her obvious compassion was what made Dr. Linda an unforgettable character. Once again just perfect casting.  

Aimee Garcia was a great addition. She made Ella a fan fav and put so much heart, joy and sincerity into Ella never once did you doubt that she would prevail no matter what was thrown at her.  Garcia was just fantastic, and I want her skin care regime.  

Scarlett Estevez pulled off the one thing I thought almost impossible.  She took the role of a young child and made it so I didn’t want to cringe. She portrayed Trixie so beautifully from day one that she was a true pleasure to watch.  Even though Trixie was super precocious Estevez never made her obnoxious. I loved Trixie and I have never said that about any child character in an adult show.  She was wonderful and has an amazing career in front of her.

That said, I’ve got some feelings now that I’ve seen the finale and have had some time to digest it all.  I love that Chloe and Lucifer had eternity and I agree that they had to be separated for Chloe’s lifetime. Didn’t like it but it’s the logical path. She’s human, he’s not. The ageing thing alone necessitated them not being together long term on earth and that’s just to start the list. They had to had to be apart for the short term to get their eternity but the duality of Lucifer's ending and Amenadiel's didn't sit right. Amenadiel as God got to have it all. His calling, his family etc. while Lucifer had to give up everything.  I also don’t buy the “If he came up from hell, he could never leave them again” defense.  I call bullshit.  Amenadiel managed, plus, missing out on the day to day is a huge sacrifice and by Lucifer missing out on the day-to-day Rory could still have had the hatred she needed to drive the story.  Popping in for birthdays, graduations, weddings, etc., the big stuff does not a father make.  Not being there for skinned knees, first heartbreaks, and all the little things a daughter needs her dad for can build up tons of resentment.  Boom, absentee father, just like his dad was. That provides all the millennial angel angst you could ask for. I have a daughter; it doesn’t take much.

The Trixie issue was huge for me. Can Chloe see her in Heaven? Will she be able to travel to Heaven and visit Trixie, Penelope, Dan, her father?  Chloe hesitated leaving Heaven in 5x16 because she couldn’t bear saying good-bye to her dad again. It seems as if Chloe sacrificed everything for Rory including Trixie. I want to preface this by saying. I liked Rory and loved the actress. I didn’t however like how it was as if she were their only child.  When Lucifer spoke of family Trixie was not mentioned. Their family day, the same thing. She didn’t need to be there, I get that the explanation regarding Rory would have been way too much to get into but just a mention of her, how awesome it would have been to share this day with her would have worked. It seemed as if Lucifer went from, “I would do anything to protect that little Urchin” to “Trixie who”. Trixie was a character that we watched grow up and she meant something to us. I hate to say this, but the writers did Trixie and the viewers dirty in this regard.

This show was built around a few premises.  Free will, honesty, redemption, sacrifice and family, both blood and made. The ending completely negated almost all of these.  Chloe and their entire family were made into the one thing Lucifer abhorred the most which are liars. Their daughter was brought up surrounded by lies. What did they tell Trixie?  The poor kid just lost her dad, and she was pissed at Lucifer when he went back to hell the first time. Did she grow up hating him because as far as she knew Lucifer left her mom again without saying good-bye and this time it was even worse because Chloe was pregnant.  I get that the actress who plays Trixie had limited availability but seriously. A quick good-bye.

“Hey Urchin, you won’t understand why for a long time, but I have to leave. You know I never lie so I can’t explain why but know that I love you and your mom and one day I hope you can forgive me.”  

A 30 second scene would have worked.

As all the characters learned throughout the series, omission of the truth is just a form of lying and there are always repercussions i.e., Chloe and Father Kinley, Dan shooting Lucifer, Maze finding out about Lilith and even Ella not being told. As far as free will, both Chloe and Lucifer had their free will taken from them in the end. By Rory forcing them to abide by her wishes, their free will was forfeited. It was a huge manipulation on Rory’s part and considering how much Lucifer hated manipulations it just didn’t sit right.

Parents making huge sacrifices I get. Chloe and Lucifer sacrificed everything for their child. Unfortunately for me this sacrifice, the way it was written seemed contrived to pull out maximum and IMO unjustified angst. I love angst.  Hell, this is my favorite show.  I thrive on the angst. But as I wrote earlier, all the anger, angst and hatred towards Lucifer could have been achieved without having Lucifer completely out of the picture. I have two kids and my husband, and I have made huge life altering sacrifices for them as many parents do but being there for the day-to-day little things was what made the difference in their lives and cemented the close relationships we have with them.

“Yeah, dad you were great. Showing up for the fun stuff, always swooping in for the big finish to play the hero then ditching us when things got tough. When Grandma was dying where were you?  Nice that you showed up for the funeral but the six months leading up to it…we needed you and once again you weren’t there. When T got sick, when Jen broke my heart, blah, blah, blah…”

Even the whole Chloe dying scenario. They could have written it that rage Rory traveled minutes before Lucifer got there. Have him pop in right after Rory comes back. There were so many ways to achieve the end game they wanted other than the way they went. It seemed contrived and as if they took the easy way out to get where they needed to go. The Rory rage that was the catalyst for her traveling back in time and Lucifer finding his calling could still have been accomplished without the whole Lucifer disappearing storyline.

Now that I’ve finished my diatribe there’s a couple of additional things I would like to say.  Lucifer is and always will be one of my favorite shows of all time. There are not enough words to describe the comfort and enjoyment this show has brought me. Thank you, thank you, thank you to the producers, cast and crew. You truly created something special.

To the fandom. Please do not let a polarizing conclusion rip apart the fandom. The only other fandom I was a part of tore itself apart so badly that the FBI got involved.  Hence why I waited for 15 years to dip my toe in again. Everyone invested in this show has the right to their feelings.  Debate is fine, baiting and bullying are not. The Lucifer fandom like the show is very special. Without the fandom we wouldn’t have gotten any conclusion so don’t let opposing viewpoints tarnish what has been a magical journey.  

[the-king-andthe-lionheart]

Arya Stark Also Loves Lemons?

"Bring me the face," said the kindly man. The waif made no answer, but she could hear her slippers whispering over the stone floor. To the girl he said, "Drink this," and pressed a cup into her hand. She drank it down at once. It was very tart, like biting into a lemon. A thousand years ago, she had known a girl who loved lemon cakes. No, that was not me, that was only Arya. – The Ugly Little Girl ADWD

This is a largely misinterpreted quote of Arya’s in this fandom.  I’ve quickly addressed this before, but I think I need to make a proper post about this to prove that this quote is not about Sansa, it’s about ARYA, as in Arya is referring to herself, just like the last sentence of that quote explicitly tells us.  

First off, no character has a monopoly on liking or loving lemons in this story, and secondly, just because Arya has never said “I love lemons/lemoncakes!” doesn’t mean she doesn’t.  And when you pay attention you’ll notice that Arya does seem to have a preference for lemon.  Here I’ll provide the quotes:

She tied the pigeon to her belt and started down the street. A man was pushing a load of tarts by on a two-wheeled cart; the smells sang of blueberries and lemons and apricots. Her stomach made a hollow rumbly noise. "Could I have one?" she heard herself say. "A lemon, or … or any kind." – Arya V AGOT

Here we see that Arya’s first choice is that of lemon, not blueberry, not apricot, but lemon, which subtextually tells us this is her preference.  

Arya would have given anything for a cup of milk and a lemon cake. – Arya V AGOT

So here Arya is living out on the streets for weeks and she longs for a cup of milk and a lemon cake?  To me this also shows a preference for lemons, considering she could have wished and longed for any food she wanted.  

Then we have Sansa trying to entice Arya to join her and the queen with lemon cakes:

"There's going to be lemon cakes and tea," Sansa went on, all adult and reasonable. Lady brushed against her leg. Sansa scratched her ears the way she liked, and Lady sat beside her on her haunches, watching Arya chase Nymeria. "Why would you want to ride a smelly old horse and get all sore and sweaty when you could recline on feather pillows and eat cakes with the queen?" – Sansa I AGOT

"Gods be true, Arya, sometimes you act like such a child," Sansa said. "I'll go by myself then. It will be ever so much nicer that way. Lady and I will eat all the lemon cakes and just have the best time without you." – Sansa I AGOT

Now granted Arya doesn’t mention wanting anything that is lemon after AGOT, but I think we have to remember that Arya was never in a situation or place where she could have indulged on the same type of food she was used to eating in AGOT and pre-series, especially when said food is expensive.  Arya is also practical and she’s not the type to continually sit around wishing for one specific type of food when she is periodically being starved and has to rely on acorn paste and bugs to survive.

I know the above quotes aren’t technically proof, but don’t worry I have more quotes that should convince you.  First I want to bring attention to the fact that once Arya is in Braavos at the HOBAW, specifically in her Cat of the Canal’s chapter, she begins referring to herself as “a/the girl” and not her name:

Braavos was a city made for secrets, a city of fogs and masks and whispers.  It’s very existence had been a secret for a century, the girl had learned […] – Cat of the Canals AFFC

“She said ‘I’ll take three cockles,’ and ‘Do you have some hot sauce, little one?’” the girl had answered. – Cat of the Canals AFFC

“No one beat me.” The girl crawled on all fours until she found her stick, then sprang back to her feet, bruised and dirty. – The Blind Girl ADWD

But mainly my real, concrete evidence comes in here, because if you pay attention to Arya’s chapters you find a pattern to how she speaks and refers to herself and her past self in AFFC and ADWD.  She refers to Arya separately from herself and in past tense. Now when I first read the books I was already an Arya fan, so I inevitably paid more attention to her POV’s, so when I came across the “A thousand years ago, she had known a girl who loved lemon cakes. No, that was not me, that was only Arya” quote, I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it was about Arya, that Arya was referring to herself.  So imagine my surprise when the vast majority of online fandom links this quote to Sansa.  If you still aren’t convinced, just read these quotes:

Cats liked the smell of Cat.  Some days she would have a dozen trailing after her before the sun went down.  From time to time the girl would throw an oyster at them and watch to see who came away with it.  The bigger toms would seldom win, she noticed; oft as not, the prize went to some smaller, quicker animal, thin and mean and hungry.  Like me, she told herself.  Her favorite was a scrawny old tom with a chewed ear who reminded her of a cat that she’d once chased all around the Red Keep. No, that was some other girl, not me. – Cat of the Canals AFFC

Once she almost fell headlong down the steps, but Syrio Forel had taught her balance in another lifetime, when she was the girl called Arya, and somehow she recovered and caught herself in time. – The Blind Girl ADWD

Sleep did not come easily that night.  Tangled in her blankets, she twisted this way and that in the cold dark room, but whichever way she turned, she saw the faces.  They have no eyes, but they can see me.  She saw her father’s face upon the wall.  Beside him hung her lady mother, and below them her three brothers all in a row.  No. That was some other girl.  I am no one, and my only brothers wear robes of black and white. – The Ugly Little Girl ADWD

So after reading these quotes and seeing how similar they are to the quote this meta is about, you can’t honestly believe that that quote is about Sansa?  And this isn’t anything against Sansa, this is just me trying to set the record straight that Arya was talking about herself.  

[roonilwazlibimagines]

i want to have birthday seggs with ron 😾😾😾

Here is how I imagine birthday sex with Ron going

Telling him that you’re his for the day and you can do absolutely anything of course with boundaries understood

Him getting really giddy and excited and in the morning he takes your offer on it and it begins with sex where you’re just kinda cuddling and probably spooning and Ron is just thrusting into you and you’re both just whimpering really softly and moaning each other’s names

But then you’re going out for his birthday or just spending it at the burrow and so he has to wait until that night

And the day is just full of hidden glances and cheeky smiles and hands on thighs much higher than what should be appropriate

But it’s all just kinda innocent and teasing fun rather than anything really intense or serious if that makes sense

But anyways as soon as you get back home your face is in Ron’s hands and you’re up against the wall and he keeps telling you how badly he has wanted this all day

And you make your way up to the bed and Ron is undressing you so quickly and fumbling because he is just so excited and eager

You complaining and whining that you wanted to get dressed in something more sexy for him

But he says it’s fine because he would’ve just ripped it off anyways

And he is hovering over you and your hands are trailing up and down his skin and he is still kissing you

And I’ve gotten a lot of requests in the past where you’re making out with Ron and he is touching your clit and you’re touching his dick and just being really close and intimate and this is the time for this

And eventually Ron gets really turned on and can’t control himself anymore and so he is moving your body so you’re on top of him now

And he is sitting up and telling you that he wants you to ride him

And you’re moving really slowly and trying to adjust but he is just way too eager and he is holding your hips and pulling them down onto him

And you’re screaming out his name and trying to move your hips but Ron is taking control and he is gripping your hips really hard and thrusting his hips up into you

And his hands are going to your boobs and teasing your nipples in between his forefinger and thumb and he just keeps going on about how hot you are and how lucky he is to have you and how you’re the best birthday present he could ever ask for

And you both cum and Ron gives you a minute to rest your head on his chest while you catch your breath and he is just murmuring small phrases of praise into your ear and playing with your hair

But eventually he is asking if you want to get on your pretty knees for him and make him feel good

And you’re nodding and he is like ‘of course you’d want my cock, wouldn’t you sweetheart? Know you love it so much’

And as he finishes his sentence his cock is already around his cock and he lets out a groan that literally goes straight to your heat and his hand instinctively goes to your hair and he is giving you control over your movements and just moving his hand with then

And you’re giving him the blowjob of a lifetime and his head is going back in pleasure and all he can do is moan out your name and grunting

And it doesn’t take him that long to cum and you’re resting your head on his thigh as he starts to calm down and you’re just like lazily drawing patterns on his legs while he catches his breath

And he wants to try 69 with you, like that is just his birthday wish

And if you’re a good height then he is in like literal heaven and he is probably asking you to do it again as soon as you finish because he loved it so much

He would be at the bottom because he just wants you to be on top and he is usually the one on top so he likes it

If height is an issue then you’re like trying everything to find a position that works for you and you’re just trying so hard because you want him to get his birthday wish

And Ron keeps telling you that it’s okay, he doesn’t need to do that

But you’re not giving up and eventually you find a position that works and Ron is just like so full of love because you were just so eager to do it for him

And he is asking if you’re okay and he is so concerned about you afterwards, but then once you’re fine he is like ‘do you maybe think we could do it again?’

And by the end of it you are completely fucked out but you end up showering with Ron (and Ron would suggest having another round in the shower as a joke but like if you were down for it he would be too)

But most of the shower is just filled with you being so close together and holding each other and trying to clean yourselves in between giggles and kisses

And afterwards he is lying on his back and you’re lying on top of him and you’re nuzzling your face in his neck and he is tracing patterns on your back and just being so close and intimate and telling him you hope he had a good birthday and him telling you that everyday is good when you’re with him 🥺

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