#if you like instrumental metal at all go check them out actually -e

[haveyouheardthisband]

[fandomfluffandfuck]

Hi S! In case you're still taking requests, and you are into this: Post-serum Stucky (and Steve/Others), medical kink. I imagine that Steve is poked and prodded and examined by dozens of doctors, nurses, medical students after he gets the serum. And every sensation is being heightened by the serum and it all just feels... So Much, and So Good. Even small touches burn (but in a good way). The contrast between fingers and metal (calipers, stethoscope). And when they start getting close to his /1

nipples, or ass/genitals, Steve can't help himself, he starts moaning and squirming. His nipples tighten, his dick gets hard and achy and starts leaking precum. And Steve is just red faced and so ashamed, because eh shouldn't be getting off on this, but he cannot hold back the noises he's making, his skin is just too raw and sensitive all over. Someone checks his testicles and he feels like he's going to die, overwhelmed by the new sensations in his new body. Anyway, maybe he comes, maybe he /2

doesn't (maybe there's a prostate exam? 🙈) but I assume he gets used to the sensations, eventually. At least somewhat. But some wires must have gotten crossed, or maybe it's just a pavlovian reflex by now, but he does develop something of a medical kink. Bucky finds out, of course (I assume there's physicals before/after missions, especially as they are still working to understand how the serum affects Steve) and he starts teasing Steve about it. How quickly he gets hot and bothered during /3

medical exams. How he must like being on display, having people touch him all over. How sensitive he is, especially his nipples. Maybe he helps Steve get off after medical exams, Steve coming to him all hard and achy and needy and desperate until Bucky fucks a few orgasms out of him (supersoldier heightened senses + refractory period make for multiple orgasms). Maybe they incorporate medical play into their sex: Bucky "examining" Steve, Steve calling him doctor etc. And Bucky likes it, /4

likes seeing how desperate Steve gets and how hot it makes him and how he gets off on it. Steve is still embarrassed, but less so when he's playing with Bucky compared to actual exams (which sometimes he still has to bite his cheek and pinch his arm to keep himself from moaning or cumming, even after months of getting used to his new body). Anyway, that came out longer than I thought, sorry for dumping such a novel on you 😬 /5 [I think? Lost count lol 🥴]

M e d i c a l K i n k

I'm into it lmao

Oof oof oof that first part you wrote about?? Steve by himself getting into it?

Fuck.

I've never thought about medical kink for Steve like that. And now that I am, sheesh. I'm so down for that.

Steve being poked and prodded nearly instantly post-serum and being so unused to all the sensations that it just goes to his dick. Bypassing his brain and hitting him where it counts. Making him so hard so fast that he gets light headed, nearly falling forward, and they think that it's a serum thing just hitting him later like a blood draw might. Unsteadying him after the fact. Steve is too embarrassed to tell them that, no, it's not the serum messing with him. It’s his own arousal. His now much larger cock filling with blood, so suddenly and unexpectedly. Rocking his world.

Then, there's the Hot and Cold sensations alike, hands versus the examiners instruments, getting to him. His body warring against the opposing sensations. The feeling of multiple examiners' hand's comparable to what it may be like to be shared in Steve's head, intrusive thoughts drawing the comparison between the medical examiners hands on him and what the hands of hungry, faceless mens' hands on him may feel like, on the verge of opening him up and running a train on him. Fucking him until they're satisfied. Wrecking him. Making him into a filthy mess, filled with and covered in cum. But he's jolted back into reality by the sensation in his chest, his nipples are hard and tight feeling as one of the examiners uses their stethoscope to get an idea of what his heart and lungs are sounding like but accidentally brushing his nipple. Maybe on purpose. Maybe without meaning but being compelled to, like Peggy was. It's cold but also hot metal because Fuck That Feels So Good. How Does That Feel So Good? Why Does That Feel So Good?! and it's going straight to his cock too.

Nothing doesn't go to his cock it seems.

All Steve can do is set his face and try to not make sounds or squirm but he's failing miserably. Breaking. Squirming and whimpering. All of it is made so much worse by how the doctors are misunderstanding it, thinking they're causing him pain and embarrassment and not So Much good feelings. Not so much pleasure that he doesn't know what to do with himself. They're apologizing to him, saying it'll be over soon. All as Steve pants, eyes drooping shut as pleasure takes him, cock so fucking hard in his pants. Leaking, aching.

Everything is a direct line to his cock.

Even hearing the doctor refer to his balls as his "testicles" in such an unconnected, doctor-ial way has shivers going straight down his straightened spine. His embarrassment is so burning, so intense that it translates fully into arousal in this fucked up loop. His emotions acting in a way he's never known them to before.

Even when they start to "palpate" him, checking his muscles for abnormal knots or possible tumors or whatever... all it means to Steve is that there's hands all over him now, making him harder. Notably erotic as one of them gets to checking his bigger, thicker muscles. Going up his thighs, towards his ass. Another set of hands down his chest to his muscle swollen pecs, towards his nipples. Steve whimpers and shakes. They apologize for tickling him. His cock twitches in his paper thin pants. There's an impossible urge inside him, wanting to beg for them both to follow through on their promises that'll all be over soon but also beg them to never stop and fucking help him. Give him release. Please.

Even when they want to look down his throat and the back of his throat is touched with the popsicle stick they're using... even that gets him. Reminding him, red faced, of how badly he gags on Bucky's cock. Asthma and previously small stature holding him back from blowing him as roughly as he'd like. Steve's mouth falls open wider and it's got nothing to do with their directions, their prompts, nothing to do with what they're doing. His eyes roll back into his head.

Everything goes straight to his cock even and especially when they insist on ushering everyone out except for one last doctor who's gonna check his prostate. Just to be sure the change in hormones hasn't done anything to him there... but... the doctor finds something. Steve's out of his mind, hazy, by this point.. And no longer holding back - just panting and moaning, squirming, as the doctor claims that his prostate feels swollen - so he doesn't question if the doctor is actually being legit or not. If he's into it or not. The doc is definitely possibly into it, possibly onto him, as he's saying that the treatment for that would be a quick massage.

It's during the massage that Steve bites down on his lower lip until it breaks. Panting and moaning, squirming as the doctor uses two fingers to massage him. Relieving him of the swelling he's claimed to find. Pressing and circling his prostate so well that his cock just... starts leaking involuntarily. Dripping. Dripping pre-cum. Making a mess until he lets go of his bloodied lip, gasping swallowly - nearly sobbing - only to bite on his inner cheek, holding his breath and Squeezing his eyes as tightly shut as he can as he cums. Giving in. Silently unable to take it anymore. Too much pleasure.

Shaking, leaning down against the chilly metal exam table, he really melts. Thankfully the doc didn't peel his underwear all the way down because, fuck, he can feel the Flood of release that his mind melting orgasm brings him to. Emptying him. Balls- testicles swollen and achy.

Now, yes, Stucky Medical Kink.

My first thought was pretty topical with vaccines:

I ENTIRELY agree that Steve's wires get crossed and after the serum he gets hard during any sort of exam. Post-mission check-ups / general wellness exams included. Bucky finding out and teasing him included (perhaps with some self depreciating jokes of how opposite his reaction to any sort of medical/doctor thing used to be too). But-

Imagine, Steve Rogers, Nothing-Will-Hold-Me-Back, I-Will-Do-Good, going out of his way to help with vaccine production. Being a lab rat, knowing nothing bad will really happen to him anyway, and time and time again, coming home to Bucky after the day of being a lab rat. Achy and desperate from being prodded and poked. His lower lip would be bleeding, a chunk taken out of the inside of his cheek too. The day spent stifling noises. And Bucky getting him off after his lab rat days begins happening so much that it too reinforces his medical kink. Knowing that not only does it feel good to go to the actual appointment but also knowing that he will get to get off right after too.

(Totally yes yes yes though, Steve gets so fucking embarrassed when Bucky first finds out. The first few times Bucky has to literally jump him to get him right after the exam, rather than Steve sneaking guiltily away into the shower to jack off 6 times before he slides down to his knees on the floor, panting. But he gets to him, flushed and embarrassed, feathers effectively ruffled from all those hands and eyes on hom. Steve moans so prettily as he comes apart easily under Bucky's hands, so worked up from all the foreign hands on his insanely sensitive body.)

Their own medical kink too though, without anyone else, yes.

"Bucky "examining" Steve, Steve calling him "doctor'"

Fuck.

My mind went straight to not a prostate exam but a testicle exam. Especially after they've been busy enough that they haven't had time to get off as much as they usually would. So, Bucky claims that his balls feel swollen and that he needs to empty them. Asking if he wants help with it or not, if he'd like him to be in the "exam room" as the treatment is administered.

Steve can only stutter the first time Bucky approaches him with it. The scene coming so close to the original spark of this kink that he cannot function. Not answering, brain whiting out, chanting yes yes yes yes yes.

Only then, Bucky snaps on gloves. And Steve can't say no. He can't. The sound hitting him like a riding crop might. Striking him.

At that point, all Steve can do is tremble and grip the bathroom counter - where their makeshift examination room is - white knuckled. Panting so hard that his tits jiggle a little and he throws his head back as the "treatment" begins. Mouth gaped. Eyelashes fluttering. Gasping, "oh, do-doctor," while Bucky does it. Rolling his balls in his hands until he whimpers and cums, spilling over and continuing to cum as Bucky touches him through his sensitivity. Forcing him to stay standing while his legs shake and forcing him to stay hard and spill more and more. Dripping down his legs and abs and onto the floor while Buckg murmurs, "let go, that's it. Just let go. We'll get you feeling better in no time, Mr. Rogers. There you go." Like he's rubbing his back, soothing him, not driving him fucking crazy. Pushing him out of his mind and into oversensitivity until he's literally falling forward. Knees buckling, doubling over. Until Bucky has to catch him and say, "woah there, Mr. Rogers. Are you alright?" His hand slipping up from his balls to his actual cock. Stroking him to one last orgasm just to hear his wrecked, gritty scream.

But it doesn't end. Not before Bucky forces him to moan, "y-yes, doctor. I, ngh-! I'm alright." Gritting his teeth and whining, now aching deliciously for it to stop. It's so much.

(There's so much else with this too, not just swollen testicles and prostates lol. Enema kink would be easy to input here because that's an actual usual fix they would've had for bowel issues back in their day. Also, easy to put in if they were role-playing Bucky as one of those first doctors, wanting to test how much it takes to fill a super soldiers stomach, y’know? Gag reflex being tested with Bucky’s dick. There could be stirrups for Steve's legs, spreading him wide. An exam table to spread him wider on, on his back, or just a cold metal table to straight out strap him down to too. Temperature play. Pain play with needles or knife kink, if that's your thing. Or even Bucky just pressing down on bruises to "see if there's any underlying damage" for pain play. Bucky putting him through a "stress test", seeing what dirty thing can get Steve's heart and breathing rate the highest. What makes him sweat the most. Anythinggg. I'm obsessed.)

Anyway-

Way to end with A Fucking Bang: "sometimes he still has to bite his cheek and pinch his arm to keep himself from moaning or cumming, even after months of getting used to his new body"

Anyway, much love for pulling this out of me lmao.

[factual-fantasy]

I don’t think I’m ever going to get tired of answering asks. :]

Of course he has, he dabbed on the same person on two different occasions. He dabbed on Volvo for asking, “Can the White Truck tow that?” Its a long story and an inside joke that’s difficult to explain.

He then dabbed on Volvo again when he jammed his finger in something and yelled “FRAG-”

Jeepy went “Yo, you cant swear there’s babies in her bro.” and then he dabbed. I swear Volvo nearly killed him.

I’m glad you checked out the memes! I had a lot of fun making them. :}

Anyway, that was partly because of the fact that there are 16 slots, and 16 characters. So some characters, like White Truck, may not quite fit in roles that were available...

However, Volvo fits because he has like, no chill.

Oh man.. the  I D E A S 

So, the game. Here’s how it works and how each bot plays. Your magnets have no points, its who you put them on that gets you the points. The goal is to sneak up on a bot, stick a magnet to their leg and slip away, unseen. Each bot is worth different amounts of points depending on the difficulty. These amounts are decided by the humans that are playing. If a bot is hard to sneak up on, they are worth more points. The smaller bots are worth more points because it is much easier for them to spot you.

Now, to the bots and how they play.

Suburban is worth a lot of points because he is very difficult to catch off guard. He is constantly hyper aware of when ever a human or a small bot is in the room with him. He is fully aware of his size and is always watching closely for things close to the ground so he doesn't step on them, thus, he is hard to sneak up on and is more challenging.

Miata: “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN SUCKERS”. Miata is worth many points because she can spot you easily and is friggin F A S T.

Now a days, no one can really sneak up on Escort after what happened. He is very aware of his surroundings and knows if you're in the room with him. However, once he knows its you that’s in the room, he pretends to not see you so he can add your magnet to his collection. He’s not worth too much because he pretends to not see you.

Brown Suburban is worth very little points because of how easy it is to stick them to him. He cant see you very well and his hearing isn’t great, so as long as you’re quiet you can land 10 magnets on him at a time. He really does like the magnets though, and the humans are aware of this so they stick any extras they have on him.

U.M.Dragster isn’t worth many points because he is a very easy target. He likes the magnets and pretends to not notice you.

A.T.Dragster? Good luck trying to catch her. She doesn't really like the magnets and is MUCH faster than your stupid fleshy legs. She is worth a TON of points.

Green Truck is worth a boat load of points. You think just because he’s old and rickety that he’s easy to sneak up on? Get out of here with that. He’s a military general! You think you can sneak up on a tank like him? Man he was TRAINED to look out for little squirts like you! He doesn't pretend to not notice you, but he does let you stick one on him anyway and says “Don't worry, I won’t tell anyone.” None of the humans have succeeded in genuinely sticking a magnet to him unnoticed.

The Humans made special aluminum star shaped magnets for Vega so he could become a target. He is worth a decent amount of points because he is rather difficult to sneak up on. He is always scanning his surrounding nervously, However, everyone targets him anyway because it makes him happy to find the aluminum stars. He has learned to pretend to be oblivious.

Red Van is the most oblivious bot in the entire base so she is not worth many points. The humans know that she loves the magnets so pretends to now know. Because of this, she gets the most magnets. Hey, it makes her happy, screw the points.

The goal with White Truck is to stick one to him without getting kicked because you startled him. Which yes, is actually a risk. He’s worth quite a bit because of the some what real danger that comes with it.

Beluga is the same as U.M., she likes the magnets and pretends to not notice you. Thus she isn't worth too many points.

Honda is worth a fair amount of points because she is small and vigilant. Although she isn't impossible to sneak up on, unlike some of the others, she isn't constantly looking around every corner out of fear. She’s just weary is all.

Ranger is the only genuine and normal contestant. She doesn’t really know the game is going on so she isn’t constantly looking out for humans. She’s worth a little above average when it comes to points because she is somewhat difficult to sneak up on. She may be oblivious to the game, but she’s still a soldier that was built for war. Sneaking up on her isn’t easy.

Volvo is worth a lot of points not because he’s hard to sneak up on, but because you might just get yeeted. First off, if you come out of no where while he’s working you might just give him a spark attack. One time Miko sneaked up on him and Ratchet while they were working. She scared the snot out of Volvo which in turn scared Ratchet and made both of them freak out. It was funny but Miko almost got booted across the room so.. Yeah, just don’t sneak up on medics. They don’t play.

Jeepy is worth a ton because he SOMEHOW spots the humans EVERY, SINGLE, TIME! Someone will be sneaking up on him and he’ll just turn around and go “Oh hi! What are you doing down there? :D” Like?? He genuinely isn’t doing it on purpose, he just somehow cant be sneaked up on.

I wouldn’t recommend trying to stick one to Bash Buggy. Although he is a part of the game and is worth quite a bit of points, the humans have been told to be careful with him, and to try their best to not scare him. He cant see them too well and is easily startled. And because of the lac of protective armor he has, his entire body is a little bit more sensitive than the others.. So, stick a cold magnet to a easily startled bot that has sensitive metal and.. well, yeah. You might just get hurt. He doesn’t really like the magnets anyway because they don’t stick to him well and he cant see them so.. yeah, nobody really goes for poor Bash Buggy. :{

He’s NOT??? Why does Google say he’s dead then??

*Cocks gun*

WHO, THE FRAG, THOGHT IT WOULD BE OKAY, TO MAKE OPTIMUS PRIME, NOT THE VOICE OPTIMUS PRIME IN THE NEXT MOVIE. WHO, TELL ME WHO. I JUST WANNA TALK.

I just imagined a wizard cloak patterned scarf and Mr. Potato head wearing a grim reaper costume. 

Yeah, something like that or a piano type instrument or something. Just something that has higher pitched sounds and is difficult to learn. 

[flamehairedwritings]

The Fire In Your Eyes: Chapter Twenty Nine

Characters: Arthur Morgan x Original Female Character

Rating: The whole series will be E, 18+ ONLY for violence, gore, character deaths, animal deaths, parent deaths, swearing, grief, sexual themes and unprotected sex, mentions of miscarriage, hanging.

Summary: Saved by Arthur Morgan when her town is attacked, a young woman’s past comes back to haunt her when she has no choice but to join the Van der Linde Gang.

Some scenes and dialogue have been taken from the game!

Read on AO3

The Fire In Your Eyes Masterlist

Please don’t copy, steal or re-post my work; credit does not count.

Lay Down Your Weary Head

It may have been a shorter ride to Valentine, but it felt like aeons to Arthur.

It was terrifying, having her sat in front of him, being able to hear each pained breath she took, feel how slack her body was. Charles had found some herbs in his saddlebag that helped with the pain, but there was only so much for him and Ada to share.

“You’re all righ’, darlin’, you’re okay...” he’d murmur in her ear, and she’d just make a faint sound in response.

He didn’t want them to stop to rest, but the horses could only gallop for so long. There were too many twists and turns, too, and the last thing he wanted right now was to collide with another traveller, or have the horses stumble and break their legs. Noka was following them as well, trying to get as close as she could to her mistress which had her bumping into Charles’s horse or Titan every few minutes. He kept them to either a canter or a trot, only slowing to a walk when they crossed a rushing section of the Dakota River.

It was early afternoon when Valentine came into view, the air still bitterly cold. Mud muffled the sounds of their hooves as they cantered past a couple of homes; chickens in coops and pigs and goats in pens sounding their surprise. Titan snorted as Arthur slowed him to a brisk trot when they came to the stables and he turned him onto the main street, sweat shining on the horse’s coat. A wagon was rumbling down towards them and people were milling about, crossing from one side to the other or just ambling down it. If he’d had time to take it all in, he’d have found not much had changed from his last visit.

“’scuse me, move, please!” Arthur called tightly, ignoring the tuts and grumbles that came from people stepping aside.

They quickly silenced themselves at the sight of Ada, however. Arthur had one arm tight around her, keeping her against him, but her head had fallen forward at some point, her chin against her chest, and no one could have mistaken what state she was in. The grumblings now turned to murmurings, both concerned and curious. Arthur shut them out.

Pulling Titan to a halt outside the doctor’s office, he released the reins before, while using his forearm to keep her upright, he moved his leg behind him and dropped down from the saddle. Ada bent forward over his arm, unable to hold herself up, and all he could hear was his own breathing. Pulling her down into his arms, he adjusted his grip on her, staring down at her pale face and closed eyes.

“Ada? Ada, darlin’?” he prompted her urgently, striding towards the steps to the office.

She was breathing but it was so shallow, and it was a couple of moments before her eyes half opened, glassy. 

She seemed a thousand miles away; fading.

Swallowing hard, Arthur lifted his head as he reached the top step, his boots loud on the wooden platform, and he used a hand to awkwardly shove the door open, a bell tinkling above it signalling his entry.

“Can I get some help here?” he demanded, meeting the gaze of a bald man to his left who was rising out of his chair behind a counter, startled.

The man swiftly got over his surprise. “Yes, of course, bring her through to the back.”

As Arthur strode across the room full of neatly displayed remedies, herbs and linens, the doctor pushed open a door and quickly began issuing orders to someone as he stepped through.

“Jocelyn, warm water, please, and cloths. And bring me my instruments.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

Arthur entered the small room to find a young woman with coiled black hair hurriedly pulling bowls out of a cupboard and placing them on a counter. The doctor reappeared through a metal door to the right of her, finishing tying an apron around himself before he rolled his shirt sleeves up.

“The table, please, sir.” He gestured to a rectangular wooden table in the centre of the room, a clean, white linen cloth covering it, and Arthur moved to the closest side.

He lay her down as carefully as he could, his hand sliding up to the back of her head so it wouldn’t knock against the wood. Removing it gently, he cupped her cheek and gazed at her, his heart thundering in his chest. He could hear the weak breaths she was dragging in, her eyes on the ceiling. Arthur swallowed the lump in his throat as he barely listened to the doctor talking to his assistant.

“Oh, Jocelyn, if you could attend to this gentleman, too. I’m afraid there’s not much room—”

“It’s okay, I’ll be fine. Look after her first.”

Charles’s voice registered to him, he must have been standing in the doorway behind him, but Arthur didn’t listen to them anymore as he gently stroked Ada’s cheek. It was exactly like last time; her stare, her pallor, her weakness—

“Sir? Sir?”

He lifted his head and found the doctor stood on the other side of the table, his fingers swiftly pulling the piece of John’s shirt they used to try and stem the flow away before he began unbuttoning her coat.

“What happened?”

“Uh, she got shot, I, it was an accident, she got caught up in a crossfire.”

“Has the bullet passed through?” The doctor tore the coat open, and Arthur stared at the hole in her side, blood staining the shirt around it. “Sir?”

He stuttered slightly as he heard Ada’s weak groan, the man pressing his fingers around the wound. “Uh, I-I don’t know, I didn’t check—”

“Give me a hand.”

He was about to ask with what when the doctor was suddenly gripping her left thigh and bicep and rolling her to her right, making Arthur quickly cradle the side of her head with one hand and place the other on her waist. She released a small, resistant sound at the movement and his thumb stroked at her cheek, a reassuring murmur on the tip of his tongue when the doctor released her, letting her settle on her back again.

“It hasn’t gone through, I’m gonna have to pull it out.”

Arthur stared at him, his hands frozen on his wife. She’d had a bullet in her this whole time. His eyes followed the man as he grabbed a bag from a counter and returned to the table, setting it down and pulling it open. His stomach turning at the tools that shone within, Arthur’s gaze dropped to her, and met her own. Her eyes were barely open but she was staring up at him, and a tear slipped down her cheek.

He sniffed and stroked her skin again, managing to lift a corner of his mouth. “Hey, you’re gonna be okay, all righ’, you—”

“Sir, please stand out of the way.” The doctor knocked his hand away from her waist, and shoved her shirt up, starting to cut away at the thin cotton corset that lay between him and her skin.

Clearing his throat, Arthur returned his gaze to her, but her eyes were closed now and he quickly looked to her chest. He released a breath when he saw the slow rise and fall of it. Stroking her forehead, he licked his dry lips.

“Gotta keep those beautiful eyes open, sweetheart, remember, you need to—”

A sympathetic but firm hand was placed on his arm and he blinked, lifting his head. The doctor had come around the table and was trying to push him towards the door, inclining his head at it.

“Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to have to wait outside.”

Arthur felt fear claw its way up his throat. “What, no, I’m not leavin’ her—”

The doctor was undeterred, and strong. “Sir, please, there’s only so much room, please wait out there.”

Arthur turned his head, hoping to find Charles on his side, but he was sat on the floor in a corner, his head leaning back against the wall, eyes closed as Jocelyn quickly attended to his wound. She must have convinced him. Arthur, however, was shaking his head.

“No, I-I, I gotta be here for her, just in case—”

“Sir, please let me do my job, I can’t do it in a crowded room and you standing over, she needs space.”

The doctor had manoeuvred him to the doorway, and Arthur gripped the doorjamb, practically digging his heels in as he craned his neck to keep his eyes on her.

“Listen, you son of a bitch, I ain’t leavin’ her! I can’t—”

“We’re wasting time, sir!” The doctor’s shout startled him into sudden silence, his gaze snapping up to meet his. Sympathy was still lingering in the man’s eyes but his features were set. “She is bleedin’ to death on that table so are you gonna let me save her?”

Arthur could only, after a moment, nod, his hands slipping from the frame.

The doctor’s voice softened minutely. “Good. Now, please wait outside. We’ll call for you.”

They’ll call for me... Good or bad, they’ll call for me...

Arthur, like he was no longer in control of his body, stepped through the doorway and turned with the movement, gazing at his wife. Her hair was spread across the cloth, and from this angle he couldn’t see her face. The last thing he saw before the doctor shut the door was her arm hanging off the table, limp.

His gaze didn’t move, staring at the wood before him. He could hear his own breathing again, ragged. He could also hear the muffled sounds of the doctor moving about, his shoes scuffing against the wooden slats of the floor. The doctor was saying something, too, but again it was muffled. Probably talking about the state she was in, how bad it was, what they’d be able to do and...

He needed fresh air, he couldn’t breathe properly. Turning on his heel, he strode across the store. The door was still open and he didn’t bother to pull it shut behind him as he stepped out, the cold air slamming him in the face. He didn’t care, though; it forced him to suck in a breath that was deep enough to actually fill his lungs and clear his mind a little. He stared at a building opposite as he took in another, watching a man wipe a cloth over the windows, cleaning them. Titan, Noka and Charles’s horse were before it, too, drinking from a water trough, their tails swishing.

Arthur stepped forward until his boot dropped down onto a step, and then he went down, sitting on the edge of the top step. His knees bent, he rested his elbows on them, his gloved fingers lacing together. They slid against each other a little strangely so he glanced down at them, and found blood drying on the leather. He pulled them off and let them fall into the mud between his boots.

Fingers lacing together again, he watched a wagon rumble by, a great, grey Shire horse pulling it along idly as the driver chatted to his partner by his side. They were transporting food, it looked like, crates stacked together marked with the name of a company a few states over. His eyes followed it until it was out of sight, heading round the corner by the hotel. Somewhere, someone was hammering away at something, metal striking metal. It echoed across the small town so Arthur couldn’t place exactly where it was coming from. Maybe there was a blacksmith nearby, crafting some tools or horseshoes. 

Sat there, still, he could feel the cold creeping up on him, the coat not quite thick enough to keep him warm while stationary. And he could feel the coldness of his wedding band against his skin. He swallowed hard as his gaze dropped to the ground. Closing his eyes, he took in long, steadying breaths, just listening to the sounds of horses and people passing by.

It was a few moments before he realised someone was calling his name. His head whipping up, he found Sadie and John slowing their horses as they approached, and he could tell they were trying not to jump to conclusions at the sight of him.

“... Arthur! Are they okay?” Sliding down from his saddle, John swiftly moved to Sadie and her horse, helping her down.

Arthur gazed at the blonde woman, watching her grip at her side as she grimaced, John keeping her upright.

“Arthur?”

At John’s prompt, Arthur glanced up at him and cleared his throat. “Uh, they’re inside there. Doctor’s lookin’ after ‘em. He’s got an assistant in there so you should go in Sadie.”

She nodded, too exhausted to respond, and John helped her up the stairs and into the store.

Arthur didn’t want to look back.

He gazed at the ground, watching the ripples in the small puddles from the movement around them. He vaguely remembered he’d read in the newspaper a few days ago that it was supposed to rain. 

Well, seems they’d been righ’.

He heard someone behind him, and then John was exhaling a heavy breath as he sat down at his side. Removing his hat, he stretched his legs out as his hands rested on his thighs.

“Jesus Christ...” he sighed quietly, shaking his head a little as he gazed across the street.

Arthur’s chest tightened as his eyes darted to him. “What? You see her? How is she?”

John shook his head quickly, meeting his gaze. “I didn’t see her, a woman just came out and took Sadie in, closed the door before I could get a look in, I’m sorry.”

He nodded once, running a hand down his mouth before he returned his attention to the puddles. He felt John watching him, knowing he was probably trying to find the right thing to say whilst knowing there wasn’t. Finally, Arthur felt his hand on his back a few moments later, patting a couple of times before it was gone. It was a small comfort, but a comfort nonetheless.

John then cleared his throat. “We got the Blackwater money.”

Arthur looked at him, his brow dipping. “What? It was actually there?”

The younger man opened his mouth to reply, but he didn’t get a chance to respond.

“Hey, fellers.”

Both men looked up to find a man with thick, grey hair, some former black colouring still lingering in some parts, even though he could only have been a few years older than Arthur, gazing down at them with a welcoming smile. The shining badge on his coat announced that he was the Sheriff of Valentine. 

“Hey,” John answered politely as Arthur just nodded.

The Sheriff nodded towards the doctor’s office, one hand on his hip. “Seems like there’s been quite a commotion. What happened?”

"Well, commotion is the word for it,” was all John said, trying to think of what the hell to say without revealing too much.

“That so?” The Sheriff looked between them. “Who wants to come down to my office and tell me all about it?”

“I will.” John was already making to rise, but Arthur lifted a hand, shaking his head.

“Nah, I will. Can’t just sit here waitin’.”

“Well, all right.” The Sheriff’s smile returned as Arthur dropped his hand, and took a step back.

Getting to his feet, Arthur brushed his hands against his coat before looking down at John. “Come get me if...”

He couldn’t finish the sentence, his lips pausing.

John nodded quickly. “I will.”

John watched the Sheriff gesture for Arthur to lead the way, his gaze darting over the man’s red bandanna tied around his neck, grey coat, black hat, and the shining silver caps on his boots. He seemed a fancy feller, though his smile wasn’t disingenuous. He looked to Arthur, seeing the slump in his broad shoulders, the slight bow of his head. 

Christ...

Running his fingers over his mouth, he leaned his elbows on his knees and watched them head down the street towards the jail, praying to whoever was listening that Arthur came out of there.

—

The Sheriff, who'd introduced himself as Daniel, held the door open for Arthur and let him pass through first. Stepping into the small building, Arthur found it comprised of a few, vacant jail cells, in fact the entire place was empty, and just enough space left for a fireplace, a board covered with posters and a simple desk. The door closed and Daniel rounded the desk, taking a seat behind it as he gestured at a wooden chair before it for Arthur to do the same. He obeyed, removing his hat and holding it between his hands. Daniel removed his, too, tossing it onto his desk and running a hand through his hair as he leaned back.

“Can I get you anythin’ to drink, uh...?”

“Arthur,” he offered, though nothing more. Yes, it had been some years since he’d been in Valentine, not since he’d robbed the bank with Karen, Bill and Lenny in fact, but the reputation and story of the Van der Linde Gang had lingered long after the night on the mountain. One of the last things he wanted right now was to be thrown into a jail cell. “And no, thank you.”

Sheriff Daniel nodded as he raised a hand. “All right. So, what happened, Arthur?”

He hadn’t planned much by way of explanation. In fact, nothing.

“We got attacked, up near Mount Hagen.”

“Hagen?” Daniel’s jaw moved slightly as his brow dipped. Lifting his chin, he called out, “Hey, Dale?”

A short man they’d passed on the porch opened the door, leaning his head in. “Sir?”

“Ain’t Mount Hagen were that Micah Bell feller is?”

“Some folks say, sir.”

“All right...” He paused for a moment, glancing at Arthur as he rubbed at his eyebrow with his thumb before looking back to Dale. “Hey, see where Benny is, you two might be ridin’ out there later.”

“Sure thing, boss.”

As Dale closed the door, Daniel returned his gaze to Arthur, clearing his throat. 

“I saw Sadie Adler go in the doctor’s office. She’s caught a few bounties for me before, and Micah Bell has a mighty reward. Is that what you were doin’ up there?”

“Nah. We’re all just old friends of Sadie’s, catchin’ up and passin’ by there.”

He couldn’t tell if Daniel believed him, and he didn’t care.

“They attack you and your friends, then?”

“Someone did, a group of ‘em. Sadie got stabbed, our friend Charles got shot as did my...” He paused for a moment. ”... my wife.”

Daniel watched him, his lips pressing together slightly with sympathy. “I’m sorry to hear that. Wallace is a hell of a doctor, though. Came all the way down here from Boston, I made sure he was right for the job myself. She’s in good hands.”

It should have been nice, hearing such reassurance from a stranger, but Arthur just nodded, hoping the interrogation would continue so he didn’t have to think.

The Sheriff seemed to sense his mood, and did what he thought was best.

Leaning forward, he settled his forearms on the desk, fingers lacing together. “Listen, uh, head on down to the saloon, tell Jackie there I sent ya. Get yourself a hot meal and a strong drink. We can talk more later.”

Arthur nodded again, and Daniel mistook his disappointment for weariness. “Thank you, sir.”

He smiled warmly, hoping it would reassure the man. “No problem at all. You’ll be safe here, I guarantee it.”

“Thank you, Sheriff.” Placing his hat on his head, Arthur stood with a slight nod and moved to the door.

Daniel dropped his gaze after a few moments, opening a drawer of his desk and pulling a sheet of paper and a pen out. He’d have to write a letter to Christopher over in Strawberry, see if he’d heard anything about the outlaw who’d given him a tremendous amount of grief a couple of months back, maybe he’d— 

“Hey...”

Daniel looked up, surprised, and found Arthur hesitating, half out of the door, his hand resting on the handle.

“Don’t send y’boys out to Hagen. They ain’t gonna find nothin’, just be a waste of time.”

He didn’t give Daniel a chance to respond, pulling the door closed behind him. The Sheriff watched through the window as the sombre, weary man headed back down the street, his shoulders heavy with the weight of the unimaginable. Scratching at his jaw, he sat back in his chair, turning the words over in his mind.

He should’ve stopped him, questioned him more.

When Sadie Adler was involved, there was always trouble, and with a group their size and the wounds they’d sustained... it all seemed too coincidental. How had they gotten away, even? Yet Arthur’s grief was very much real, though, and they didn’t seem like bad people. Hell, Sadie was one of the best he’d ever met, he couldn’t imagine she’d hang around with unsavoury folk; she could barely tolerate people as it was. Tapping a finger against the armrest of his chair, Daniel’s gaze shifted to one of the wanted posters on the wall opposite him.

‘WANTED: MICAH BELL, FOR MURDER, THEFT, ASSAULT, ARSON, PROPERTY DAMAGE, KIDNAPPING, DISTURBING THE PEACE. REWARD $200 DEAD OR ALIVE’

The paper was worn despite it only having been up for three months, the bounty having gone up then. Many bounty hunters came and went, all of them studying the drawing of the man before boldly declaring, oh, don’t you worry, Sheriff Dan, I’ll get him. They either never returned, dead or embarrassed, or they came trailing in, mournful and ashamed, looking for consolation.

If her friends were even half as good as her, hell, Sadie Adler could well have finally put him down.

The door opened and Dale stepped in, pushing his hat back on his head slightly. “Sir? Found Benny, you want us to head out to Hagen?”

Daniel’s jaw moved as he glanced back at the poster.

“... Yeah. Take Carl, too, if he’s around. Take plenty of ammunition with you. And come to me before y’all go.”

“Yes, boss.”

He had half a mind to go with them, but... No. He wanted to keep an eye on the wounded group, make sure they were okay... Make sure she was okay.

—

Arthur moved across the boards that lay before the buildings, giving an automatic, barely-there smile whenever he’d accidentally meet someone’s gaze. They’d only been there ten minutes but people were already giving sympathetic nods and smiles; word had spread around the small town.

No doubt how the Sheriff had heard of their arrival, then again they had, as he’d said, caused quite a commotion. He should have been kicking himself for his departing words, but he’d said them to genuinely tell the man not to waste his time, not as a warning. He didn’t know how Daniel would react to it, and he didn’t much care. He guessed his boys wouldn’t fancy hiking all the way up the mountain just to see if he was telling the truth.

John raised his eyebrows as he approached, still sat on the step. “That was fast. Everythin’ okay?”

“Yeah. Offered me a free meal.”

John raised his eyebrows even higher as Arthur returned to his seat beside him, one leg stretched out. “You didn’t take it?”

“Not hungry. Tell me ‘bout that money.”

The younger man knew when not to press. Raising a hand, he shrugged. “It was really there, in a chest. I don’t know when they must have gone back and got it but there was a hell of a lot there. Gold bars, bills, coins, some additions, too, that they must have added like jewels and that. Got it all into saddlebags and then came after you as quickly as we could.” He gave a lopsided smile as he looked at him. “Guess you can build that stable now.”

Arthur was gazing across the street, nodding slightly. “Guess so.”

He’d wanted to be distracted and it hadn’t worked, John could see that, and they both knew nothing would. John chewed at his lower lip, trying to find the right words to say again.

“... She’s gonna be okay.”

Arthur released a long, almost faintly exasperated sigh, the sound catching in his throat slightly.

“And what if she’s not, John. Feel like my...” His teeth dragged over his lower lip as his hand lifted slightly. “Feel like my fuckin’ heart’s torn in two.” He swallowed hard, and John realised he was hesitating about something. “... Y’know when she, uh... When she gave birth to Millie, it was bad.” He was shaking his head, his jaw moving. “Thought I was gonna fuckin’ lose her. When I was bringin’ her down from the mountain that’s all I could fuckin’ think about, and... and now...” He drew in a shaking breath, meeting John’s gaze for the briefest of moments. “... She’s lost a lot of blood, John. That weren’t a short journey.”

“She’s gonna be okay—”

“You didn’t see her. She couldn’t hear me, she wasn’t there. And I can’t go in there to see how she’s doin’ ‘cause the doctor’s gotta do his work but I can’t just sit out here thinkin’ about all the pain she’s in ‘cause of my fuckin’ mistake, my stupid, fuckin’ mistake that shouldn’t have happened, I should have fuckin’ known, and I don’t think I even can see her like that again, in all that pain again but now it’s ‘cause of my doin’, I just don’t think I can, I’m a fuckin’ coward, I know it, I’ll fuckin’ say it, but I can’t, and I don’t, I don’t know what I’m gonna do if I lose her, I can’t fuckin’, I can’t live without her, John, I fuckin’ can’t.”

He wiped harshly at his cheek, a tear having escaped, before he blew out a shaking breath as he covered his eyes with his hand, his head tilted down.

John watched him, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. A few moments later, Arthur felt his hand return to his back.

“You ain’t a coward, Arthur.”

John thought it wasn’t much by way of consolation, but to Arthur it was enough. A small enough, but enough. Nodding minutely, he took in a few slow, deep breaths. John’s hand moved slightly, giving a small rub, and it was another small enough. 

Wiping at his eyes, he sniffed and lifted his head, glancing at John a moment later.

“You should get yourself somethin’ to eat. Take up that free meal for me.”

Lowering his hand, John gave a faint smile as he shook his head, lacing his fingers together, elbows on his knees. “Nah, I’m okay. I ain’t too hungry neither.”

“I am.”

Both their heads turned sharply, finding Charles stepping out onto the porch behind them. He looked weary but in one piece, his wounded shoulder rather rigid.

“Hey, Charles, y—”

“Are you okay—”

He waved off their concerns, nodding as he approached and lowered himself down to sit on the other side of Arthur with a slight groan.

“I’m fine, I’m fine. Got stitched up and a dressing over it, I’ll be fine.”

“That’s good.” Arthur’s teeth grazed over his lower lip as he paused, watching Charles settle his forearm on his leg to take the strain off his shoulder. “... Is... Is Ada okay?”

Charles met his gaze and did what Arthur had feared; hesitated. 

“Uh... I didn’t get much of a look but... Yeah, he’s... He’s doing everythin’ he can.”

Arthur stared at him, trying to shove down the urge to yell, ‘What the hell does that mean?!’ 

“How’s Sadie?”

Charles held Arthur’s gaze for moment longer, apologetically, before it shifted to John.

“I don’t know either. She’s bein’ treated in the doctor’s personal rooms ‘cause there isn’t any space, the assistant, Jocelyn, is lookin’ after her.”

John nodded quietly, the pads of his thumbs tapping together, and looked away, gazing across the street. Arthur had done the same, staring at the muddy ground at their feet, silent.

Charles looked between them.

He didn’t want to tell them, would never tell them, probably, that he had heard Sadie cursing up a storm and crying out, all the while refusing morphine, insisting she was fine, and that Ada hadn’t made a sound and hadn’t moved, eyes closed, lips parted as the doctor wiped and wiped the blood away, murmuring to himself as he tried to find the bullet.

Sniffing, he joined them in their silence, watching people go by. He wasn’t hungry anymore.

The citizens of Valentine tried to subtly look them over, some others being not so shy about it. No one came to talk to them but they lowered their voices as they went by, murmuring to one another about what might have happened, curious and speculative in a way that verged on disrespectful. The three men tried not to pay attention, thinking of nothing and everything.

Time ticked by silently.

Arthur was contemplating whether to just get that meal to have something to do, when the sound of shoes and a throat clearing came from behind them. He was the fastest to turn, followed by John, and then Charles, who was leaning against a wooden post. In fact at seeing the doctor, Wallace, approach, he shot up to his feet, lips parting as he stared at him, trying to assess his unreadable expression in the same moment he took in his hands wiping on his bloodied apron. John got to his feet, too, while Charles remained seated, all of them still silent.

Wallace pressed his lips together as he dropped his hands, fixing his gaze on Arthur. “Well, sir, I’ve done what I can for your wife. I got the bullet out but she has lost some amount of blood. If she makes it to the evening, though, and there isn’t an infection, then I’ll take that as a good sign, but we may not be out of the woods yet. I’ll keep a close eye on her as I may need to do a transfusion if she deteriorates in the next hour or so.” He looked between them all now. “Your friend, Sadie Adler, is weakened but conscious. They both need rest, gentlemen, and you all do, too. I recommend you get yourselves some rooms across the way there, I can send Jocelyn for you if anythin’ changes.” His attention returned to Arthur. “I gave your wife some morphine so she won’t have felt any pain during it, and she’ll also probably not wake for a while.”

Arthur stared at him, feeling hollow. “Can I...” He had to pause to clear his throat. “Can I see her?”

Wallace nodded, stepping aside. “Of course.”

“Thank you... Thank you, Doctor.” As Arthur passed him, he placed a grateful hand on his shoulder for the briefest of moments before he was striding across the store.

  The door to the backroom was ajar and, as he pushed it open, he stilled, hand pausing on the wood.

She was like stone on the table.

Swallowing hard, he took a couple of steps closer until his finger tips touched the table as he stood by the side of it, and he gazed down at her.

She was paler than she’d been from the cold of the mountain. Eyes closed, lips parted, her hands now folded neatly on her torso, her bloodied shirt settled back in its place. His fingers twitched, hesitating, before he raised his hand and lifted her shirt a few inches. The corset had been cut away, leaving room for the clean bandaging that was now wrapped around her stomach; he could see no sign of the wound. Lowering the shirt, his gaze travelled back up to her face. Mercifully, he could see her breathing, could see, clearly, that she was asleep, though her breaths... They were so faint that he found himself staring at her chest to see if she really was.

After a minute or so, his hand went to her cheek, cupping it gently as his thumb stroked across her skin slowly.

He didn’t realise he was crying until a tear dropped from his cheek and landed on his arm. Sniffing, he pressed his lips together, his teeth gritting. His finger tips brushed against her neck lightly, pausing for a few moments to feel her pulse. There, beating gently. Sniffing again, he released a breath.

“Awh, hell... You ain’t leavin’ me, woman...” he murmured, his voice cracking roughly.

Lowering his head, tears stung at his eyes as he kissed her forehead, her temple, cheeks, lips, chin...

Resting his forehead against her own, he closed his eyes, just holding still. 

He only straightened when he heard footsteps in the other room.

“Arthur?”

Wiping at his cheeks, he swallowed but didn’t turn at John’s voice, his hand settling over Ada’s.

“Yeah.”

“Uh, Charles has got us some rooms.” He was standing in the doorway behind him, voice quiet. “I’m gonna take Sadie over. You need anythin’?”

“Nah, thanks.”

“Sure.” John was silent for a few moments. “The doc’ says he’ll be in in a second to check on her.”

“All righ’.” Looking over his shoulder, Arthur gave him a faint, grateful smile, and the younger man nodded, returning it.

John watched as Arthur turned away, his attention returning to his wife, and his own gaze dropped, too. He held such great affection for Ada, he loved her, in fact, would forever be indebted to her for all that she’d done and for making Arthur happy. They’d all only just got each other back and now here they were... 

She looked like such a shell of herself on that table.

Looking away, he crossed the small, claustrophobic room to the doctor’s private chambers, pushing the heavy metal door open. Entering, he found Sadie sat on a similar table, except all around her were the signs and ornaments of life; photographs on walls, notebooks on counters, thick lace curtains covering windows, cushions on the floor from where chairs had been hastily shoved aside. The woman herself sat with her head bowed, eyes closed, hand resting on her side over her coat where her bandaged wound was. She lifted her head at the creaking of the door, and raised her eyebrows.

“‘bout damn time. Are we gettin’ out of here?”

John shook his head as he closed the door behind him, wanting to give Arthur some privacy. “Uh, nah, not yet.”

She stilled, studying him, her throat bobbing. “... She’s okay, right?”

He nodded quickly, holding his hat between his hands. “Yeah, yeah, she’s, uh, she’s okay. Doc’ says she ain’t out of the woods just yet, but she’s okay. We just gotta wait until tonight to see.”

“Okay.” Sadie inhaled a long breath before she slid off the table with a wince.

He was instantly by her side, an arm around her waist, pulling one of hers over his shoulder.

“Where we goin’, then?” she asked quietly as he helped her towards the door.

“We got some rooms at the hotel across the way. Charles is waitin’ there. We were thinkin’ about gettin’ somethin’ to eat, too, at the saloon.”

It was disconcerting, talking about such basic needs to take care of while they were waiting to find out if their friend was going to live or die.

They paused to allow him to open the door and, passing through, they paused again, John finding Arthur hadn’t moved, Sadie finding her friend lying motionless on the same table. Arthur turned again, giving Sadie the same small smile he’d given John as he met her gaze.

“Hey, Sadie, glad to see you’re okay.”

This was the moment, out of all the wonderful and terrible moments in the past week, that made Sadie want to just sit down and weep. She knew what Arthur was going through, what else he might have to endure, and it broke her heart.

Managing an easy smile, she blinked to clear her vision, relieved her voice held. “Thanks. Feel like shit.”

He gave an almost automatic, exhaled laugh, nodding. “Hm. Get some rest, won’t you.”

“Yeah. You try to, too.”

“Yeah.”

They both knew he wouldn’t. It was Sadie who moved first out of her and John, wanting to be out of that room before her chest caved in.

John didn’t say a word, and she was most grateful for it. She was grateful for the sounds of Valentine, too, as they crossed the store, for the signs of a world carrying on, regardless, regardless. Stepping out onto the boards and into the crisp, fresh air, she inhaled it deep into her lungs, forgetting for a moment she was wounded. Her stomach expanding with the breath pulled at the stitches, and her exhale was slightly hissed. John knew better than to make a comment. They moved down the steps into the mud, and her gaze travelled the street as she let John guide her towards the hotel though she could have done the journey with her eyes closed.

People were watching, staring, really, but as always she didn’t care. They always did when she came into town, whispering to each other all kinds of things. Sadie Adler, the female bounty hunter, who only came into town when trouble was around, and was more often than not covered in blood, her own and someone else’s. 

A frequent watcher met her gaze.

Sheriff Daniel was stood outside his office, hands on his hips, back straight, listening to what Doctor Wallace was telling him. He held her gaze for longer than necessary, though she was doing the exact same. He only looked away when Wallace seemed to bring their conversation to an end, smiling, ever the polite lawman.

Moving up the steps to the hotel, Charles waited for them inside, keys held in his hands. They just followed him up the stairs silently, hearts heavy.

—

John had pulled the door closed behind them as they’d left, and the room was now quiet.

He didn’t move and the room stayed quiet until the door opened again a few minutes later, though Arthur wasn’t aware of time. 

“Sir.”

Arthur blinked and turned quickly at the doctor’s voice, his hand staying on Ada’s.

“Doc’, hey.”

Wallace, still wearing the horrible, bloodied apron, came around to the other side of the table. Arthur watched him intently as he lifted her shirt and inspected the wound dressing, his fingers lightly pressing over it. He then lifted one of her hands, checking her pulse at her wrist, before carefully setting it and the shirt back in place. The back of his hand then went to her forehead, resting against it. As his hand came away, Arthur cleared his throat.

“How is she?”

“Fine.” Wallace rested his hands on the table, only to raise one after a moment to gesture at her torso. “She hasn’t bled through the stitches or dressing. No sign of a fever yet, either. It’s going to take some time for her to get her full strength back, though, if she makes it through the night.”

Arthur looked to him sharply, his jaw tensing.

Wallace pressed his lips together. “I’m a doctor, sir, I would be doing you a disservice if I wasn’t honest.”

Arthur’s eyebrows raised a fraction as he exhaled a breath. “I don’t know whether to thank you or hit you.”

The doctor surprised him with a light, brief smile. “That’s not the first time I’ve heard that, sir.” Straightening, he wiped his hands on a clean section of his apron. “I assume you want to stay, and I won’t make you leave this time. I’ll check up on her every hour, though of course notify me if you believe anything is wrong.”

“Sure...” Arthur nodded, exhaling another breath as his shoulders dropped. “Thank you, again.”

“You’re welcome, sir.”

“Arthur, please.”

“All right, Arthur.” Moving away from the table, Wallace finally untied his apron. “I’ll bring you a chair. Do you want something to eat?”

“No, thank you.”

Arthur was already holding her hand again, his thumb brushing back and forth over her knuckles. When Wallace brought him a chair, he gave his thanks once more and pulled it close to the table, sitting down and removing his hat, dropping it on the floor. 

He held her hand as his gaze went from her features to her torso and to the window opposite him over the next few hours. The small window gave no view to occupy him, just displayed the side of the next building. The lace of the curtain that covered it was thick enough that he wouldn’t have been able to see much anyway, just making out the shapes of people who occasionally passed and the colours of their coats. Charles came by to give him the key to a room for him, just in case. He didn’t stay long, just gazed down at Ada and patted Arthur comfortingly on the back.

Wallace came three times, every hour as promised, and the only change was that she was warmer, though he couldn’t confirm if it was a fever yet. However, as there was no fire in the room and all Arthur had found to put over her was her coat, he told him it was most likely one would occur, and while it was common, it would depend on how strong her body was for her to fight it.

When he left, Arthur turned his words over in his mind, his free hand rubbing across his brow. There were medicines and herbs of course, Wallace had reassured him on that which he already knew, but... This wasn’t the kind of sickness she usually caught in the winter, come from nowhere to attack her healthy, strong body. She was weak, and this could be the final straw.

He wiped at his eyes, feeling so utterly useless and helpless. He’d tried so hard not to think about her but... Millie was at home, waiting for them. Waiting for her Ma and Pa to come home and be there always, the illusion and safety of innocence not yet shattered. He held both of his wife’s hands tightly, his elbows on the table, eyes shining.

“You ain’t goin’ anywhere...” he murmured, not realising he was talking out loud. “... You ain’t leavin’ me... You ain’t goin...”

He closed his eyes, trying to regulate his breathing because he could feel the panic coming again. Deep breath in, deep breath out, deep breath in, deep breath out...

A sound startled him, making his eyes snap open and his head shoot up. The first thing his gaze landed on was the window and he found it was suddenly dark outside—

Ah, shit...

He’d fallen asleep. It must have been someone outside passing by who had roused him—

“Arthur?”

His eyes darted to her at the quiet voice, and met her gaze. His breath catching in his throat, his hands found hers again and gripped them as he leaned forward.

“Oh, I’m here, sweetheart, I’m here...”

Ada gazed at him, eyes not quite fully open, shaking faintly and sweating, still pale, but her thumb brushed against his skin slightly. 

“Is everyone okay?”

He could have wept.

Nodding, one hand moved to stroke her forehead and hair as he managed a smile, his heart aching. “Yeah, they’re all fine, darlin’, everyone’s okay.”

“Good.” She was obviously too exhausted to say more than a few words at a time. 

Wetting his dry lips, he continued to gently stroke her hair. “Are you okay?”

“Feel a little strange.”

“That might be the morphine wearin’ off. Do you feel warm?”

She shook her head slightly. “Cold.”

Shit. 

Her forehead was warm, very warm. He managed another smile as he stroked her cheek.

“All righ’, I’ll just go and get the Doc’, tell ‘im—”

“Don’t go.”

The flash of panic in her eyes sent a knife through his heart. He instantly tightened his grip on her hands and resumed stroking her hair, nodding a few times.

“Okay, sweetheart, I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

He watched her swallow thickly, tears now suddenly filling her eyes. Lifting one of her hands, he pressed a kiss to the back of it, a tear of his own sliding down his nose as he blinked. Meeting her gaze again, he managed another, faint smile, hoping to God his voice wouldn’t crack.

“I love you, Ada.”

It seemed to be both the best and the worst thing to say in that moment as her features crumbled slightly and she released a shaking breath.

“I love you, too.”

Sniffing, he clenched his jaw, trying to keep anymore tears at bay. “I thought... I thought I was gunna lose you, darlin’, I thought you were gonna...”

He couldn’t finish.

She nodded, fingers curling around his. “I thought I did, I...” A quiet sound escaped her, almost a sob. “... want to go home, I want to see Millie...”

He didn’t think his heart could have broken anymore. “I know, my love, I do, too. You gotta rest a little more, though.”

Ada was shaking her head before he’d even finished. “I don’t want to be here, I want to go home.”

“I know, I know...” He stroked her forehead, feeling it burn beneath his hand. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he tilted his head, somehow summoning up a light smile. “Get some more rest, all righ’, I’ll talk with the Doc’, figure somethin’ out, okay?”

She just nodded, too tired to say anymore or argue. He watched her close her eyes, a short flash of panic racing through him with a prayer that she would open them again. Pressing another kiss to her hand, he then rose, his chair quietly scraping back against the wood. Wiping at his eyes, he finally released her hands and turned away, moving to the wooden door. 

He’d assumed the doctor would be behind the counter and he was right, the man reading a newspaper by candlelight. He set it down when Arthur entered, leaning back in his chair.

“Hello, Arthur. Everything all right?”

“Uh, yeah.” Arthur closed the door behind him and took a few more steps into the room, nearing him as he ran a hand through his hair. “She’s woken up.”

Wallace nodded as a smile pulled at his lips. “Has she? That’s wonderful. I’ll come in and—”

“Uh, actually, before you do...” Arthur interrupted him quietly, taking another step closer. “... I was just... Can I... Is it okay if I take her across to the hotel? It ain’t exactly comfortable on that table and she doesn’t want to be in there.”

The doctor pressed his lips together. “... The move might pain her, but... Yes, I can see the advantages of it as she does need comfortable rest. I don’t have anything that could be used to transport her over so you would have to carry her, which, as I said, might pain her. I don’t want the stitches to tear, either... You would have to be very careful.”

Arthur nodded quickly. “I would be.”

He regarded him for a moment, before nodding. “I’ll allow it.”

Arthur guessed he probably looked at relieved as he felt. “Thank you, Doc’.” He was about to turn away when he decided to take a chance. Licking his lips, he raised his hands slightly. “She wants to go home but I imagine you ain’t gonna allow that.”

Wallace tilted his head, raising his eyebrows. “No, I’m not. Not for a few days, at the very least.”

“Yeah, I thought as much.”

He hoped that this compromise would be enough for Ada, for now. He really didn’t want her getting upset or melancholy, not right now when she so needed rest.

She did open her eyes when he returned and even smiled faintly when he told her what was going to happen which cheered him more than he had thought. Yet he could see she wasn’t quite there, wasn’t quite herself... and there was still the actual moving part to happen. Wallace instructed him on how to carry her, that if any bleeding came through the bandaging he was to come for him immediately, and handed him a tonic to give her half of before he carried her, and another bottle of milky liquid for the potential fever. Arthur listened intently and assured him once again that he would be careful. Wallace didn’t doubt him.

Arthur helped Ada to drink a little of both of the tonics, and she winced at their bitter taste as he settled her coat more tightly around her. Then, it was time.

As carefully as he possibly could, he slid his arms under her and lifted her. Just like he’d been told to, he held her so her right side was against him, meaning her wound wouldn’t be disturbed. Still, it wasn’t comfortable. As he carried her through the store and out into the street, he glanced down at her every few moments and caught her pained winces, being too weak to hide them. Her eyes were closed, too, and he wished he could move faster.

Approaching the hotel, he encountered Sheriff Daniel exiting, placing his hat on his head. The lawman smiled warmly before his gaze dropped to Ada, and it faded.

“Can I offer my assistance, Arthur?”

“It’s okay, Sheriff, thank you.”

He thanked him once again as he held the door open for him, before nodding at the owner who’d obviously been told what had happened and just nodded back with a sense of familiarity and sympathy. Carrying her up the stairs was the hardest part. He felt her hand on the back of his coat, gripping it as tight as she could in her condition, and his stomach twisted. Small, strained sounds would escape her and he’d murmur apologies and soothing words.

Finally reaching the top, he moved down the narrow corridor to their room. It was unlocked, as Charles had said, and it only took a couple of moments for him to shift his hand and turn the door knob to push it open. It was a small room, but certainly bigger than the one she’d just been in. There were two windows, one opposite a warm fire and the other by the neatly made bed. There was a mirror in another corner, two chest of drawers against a wall, and a thin rug on the floor. He took her straight to the bed, laying her down as gently as he could but she still hissed in a breath. 

Once she was down, though, he pulled his arms out from under her carefully and lifted the coat from her. Draping it over the railing at the foot of the bed, he then lifted her shirt and, mercifully, found no blood had seeped through her bandages. Covering it again, he smiled as he met her gaze and pulled a blanket up over her.

“There, that okay?”

She nodded, and the move had obviously taken what little energy she’d had left out of her. “Yeah. Better.”

“Good.”

Stroking her cheek, he then moved to the door, closed and locked it, before setting the key on the closest chest of drawers. Pulling his boots off, he let them drop to the floor, leaving them where they lay. After inspecting the fire and adding a few more logs, he pulled the curtains closed and returned to her, unbuttoning his coat. She’d watched him the whole time, though he could tell it was some effort to keep her eyes open.

“Yeah, there we go...” he murmured as he left his coat and gun belt on the floor and carefully moved over her, settling by her side. “... Got a warm fire, soft bed, warm and soft husband...”

She smiled faintly, her hands settling on the arm he lay across her hips. It faded nearly instantly though as her head turned to him.

“I want to go home tomorrow, Arthur.”

He made his own light smile linger, his thumb rubbing over her hip, feeling the edge of the bandaging. “I know, darlin’. Let’s get some rest, though, huh, and we’ll talk about it in the mornin’.”

Again, she was too tired to argue. When her eyes closed, he pressed a kiss to her burning temple, feeling the sweat that covered her skin, and kept his gaze on her, swallowing.

Make it through, make it through, make it through...

— 

He was dragged from his sleep by the sounds of retching and nails digging into his arm. 

His eyes snapping open, he found her bent over the side of the bed, throwing up the little that was in her stomach into the chamber pot.

“Shit, darlin’...”

One arm quickly went around her to stop her from falling off the bed as the other held her hair back as best as he could. She only retched a few more times, her stomach empty. Releasing her hair, he stroked her back as she took in deep breaths, his heart aching.

A reaction to the medicine or the fever, possibly, hopefully, or maybe... 

Raising his hand to her forehead, he cupped it and found it wasn’t burning.

Shit.

Rubbing her back again, he gave her all the time she needed.

“It’s okay, sweetheart... It’s all right...”

When she eventually lay back down, she was pale, drawn, shaking and sweating, but lucid. She responded when he asked if she was okay, nodding and humming out a sound. His other hand went to her shirt, lifting it.

He saw what he’d feared; spots of blood on the bandage.

Dropping the shirt, he smoothed her damp hair away from her face, watching her fix her gaze on the wall as she breathed deeply.

“Sweetheart, I’m gonna go and get the doctor, all righ’, he needs to take a look at you.”

She didn’t protest, didn’t even really react, and he swiftly pulled his boots on, unlocking and darting out of the door, his heart pounding. 

It was well past midnight but revellers were still at the saloon, some drunkenly calling out to him as he ran, laughing. He ran down an alley way between two buildings, heading for the back door of the Doctor’s building. Slamming his fist several times against the metal door, breathing hard, he stared at it, murmuring under his breath, “C’mon, c’mon, c’mon...”

Wallace was, thankfully, a light sleeper, opening the door less than a minute after Arthur knocked on it. He only needed to see Arthur’s expression. Grabbing his bag, they hurried over to the hotel and Arthur stood by the door as Wallace attended to her, feeling her forehead, pulse, unwrapping the bandages and cleaning up some of the blood that had come from a couple of torn stitches.

She panted lightly, staring up at the ceiling as her hair stuck to her skin.

He agreed with Arthur, that perhaps it must have been from the medicine she’d been give as, although she was warm, no extreme fever seemed to have a hold of her. Ada just lay with her eyes closed, breathing in and out. Once Wallace was satisfied, Arthur shook his hand, thanked him once again, and went to close the door after the doctor had declined his offer to walk him out.

Wallace stopped him, turning at the last moment and saying quietly, “It’s going to be a difficult night, Arthur, for both of you. This may be a reaction to the tonic, yes, but it could also be from the situation. Being attacked and shot can take quite the toll on the mind. It could be catching up to what has happened and she could be in shock.”

Arthur nodded, running a hand through his hair as he took in a breath, looking and feeling twenty years older. “Yeah, I... That’s what I'd feared.”

The man studied his features. “You’ve seen her like this before?”

He just nodded again, not wanting to divulge the far too many times he had.

“Then you know what to do, Arthur.”

Arthur watched him head down the corridor, gripping the door handle.

Yes. Yes, he did.

They were the words he needed to hear, the reassurance he needed. Closing and locking the door, he turned to her.

She was sucking in breaths that weren’t quite long enough, her hands gripped together on her stomach, knuckles white, eye shining.

He knew it wasn’t a fever, not all of it, maybe not any of it. She was trapped in her mind, resuming what had started on Mount Hagen with her murmured, “It’s over...”

He approached the bed, his heart aching unbearably, but yes, he knew what to do. Gently lifting her leg, he removed her boot, then pulled off the other, settling them side by side on the floor by the foot of the bed. Moving over her carefully, he settled at her side on his back, wrapped his arms around her and pulled her a little closer until her head was on his shoulder. Again, she didn’t protest, didn’t react. He stroked her arm lightly, his other hand resting over her clenched ones, caressing her knuckles while his cheek settled against the top of her head.

She was rigid against him, but he just held and stroked her, gazing at the same wall she was. The only sounds in the room were the crackling of the fire and her harsh breaths. Pressing a kiss to the top of her head, he didn’t think about time, didn’t think about much at all really, just focussed on her and every breath she took as he waited.

And then, finally, finally, finally, not long after a clock in the room chimed the early hour, the fear and the grief and the shock was released from her with a shuddering sob.

He held her tighter as she cried and cried, a hand coming up to cover her face as she turned her head closer to him. He didn’t say anything, letting her release it all. A few tears of his own slipped down his cheek but he felt a weight lift off of his chest; it had sometimes taken days for the melancholy to break, even weeks, and while he wished he could give her all that time, it just couldn’t be done now.

He also knew that it wouldn’t leave her completely, probably wouldn’t until they were home and maybe not even then, but he was relieved, for now.

Tightening his arms around her, he closed his eyes, his hand coming up to cup her neck, his thumb stroking against her jaw.

“You’re okay, sweetheart... You’re okay...” he murmured as her body shook against his from her sobs, his shirt wet. “... It’s over, we’re safe...”

And, he realised himself with an ache in his chest, that they finally were.

—

He felt fingers running through his hair, gently untangling locks of it. It was so soothing.

Good, a nice dream.

He hummed quietly, tilting his head closer to the touch. Gentle laughter came and it made him smile; it sounded just like her.

“Good morning...” the voice he loved most in the world murmured and he smiled.

“Mornin’...”

Lips brushed against his chin and, damn, it felt real.

Wait a second...

His sleep-addled brain was slow to catch up, and he almost didn’t believe what it was telling him. He almost didn’t want to find out, but...

Opening his eyes, he found the love of his life gazing at him, her finger tips brushing against his jaw, dark circles under her tired eyes but she was...

“Sweetheart?”

Ada’s smile widened.

“Hello, my love.”

“Oh, Ada...”

Euphoria overwhelmed him as he cupped her cheek and captured her lips in a fierce kiss. She was still smiling as she returned it, her finger tips resting against his neck. He kissed her over and over again until she was laughing softly. He swiftly drew his head back, however, when the events of the night came crashing back to him.

“How do you feel? Are you okay?” His hand went to her forehead so quickly he nearly smacked her in the head and she just couldn’t stop smiling.

“Well, I feel like I’ve been kicked by a horse and thrown down a ravine, but fine.”

"You sure?”

He believed her, his thumb stroking across her cheekbone, but she looked completely exhausted, and he was asking after more than her physical state.

She nodded, her other hand resting on her torso. “Yeah, just fine.”

“Christ, woman...” He kissed her again, and poured every ounce of love he had for her into it. She understood and returned every bit of it, not pulling back until he did.

Caressing her cheek, he gazed at her, shaking his head. “I love you, Ada.”

“I love you,” she murmured, tilting her head as her fingers traced down his jaw. 

Real. Real and alive.

His eyes travelled her features, the lines at the corners of her eyes he loved so much, the slope of her nose, the shape of her lips...

She watched him watch her, a light shine to her eyes. She knew the kind of relief he was feeling.

A trader shouting outside, heralding potential customers, pulled him out of his daze, his eyebrows raising as he blinked.

“Shit, I’m sorry, you want anythin’? Somethin’ to eat, drink?”

“I’m a little thirsty.”

“Shit, sorry...”

She laughed softly, awkwardly, the movement probably paining her a little as her stomach moved, while he moved over her, pausing to press a firm kiss to her lips before he continued on, setting his boots on the floor.

"Okay...” Grabbing his coat and gunbelt from the floor, he pulled them on as his gaze returned to her. “... I’m gonna see where the others are, see how they’re doin’, and then I’m gonna get us some food and water, all righ’?”

She nodded, her smile lingering.

“And then we can go home?”

He managed to stop himself from pausing as he adjusted the collar of his coat. One corner of his mouth lifting a little higher than the other, he started to button it.

“We’ll talk once we’ve got food in our stomachs, all right? I can’t think straight on an empty stomach, you know that. I won’t be long.”

She smiled tenderly as he approached. “Bye.”

He placed a hand on the mattress and leaned down, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to her lips.

“Have I told you I love you?” he murmured against them, and her fingers brushed against his cheek.

“Tell me again.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too, Arthur Morgan.”

When he kissed her again her hands cupped his face and it took a Herculean effort for him to break it.

“All righ’, all righ’...” he sighed begrudgingly, pulling his head back and gazing down at her.

Shaking his head at her faintly mischievous smile, God, he loved her so much, his fingers stroked her hip.

He paused at feeling the bandage. His gaze dropping, he lifted her shirt, and found the bandage a pristine white, no blood to be seen anywhere.

Thank God.

He just couldn’t stop himself from leaning down and kissing her again. She hummed softly against his lips and, oh, Christ, he had to pull away.

“I won’t be long,” he repeated as he strode for the door, hearing her chuckle at his speed.

He smiled at her as he unlocked and opened it, his heart warming as she returned it. 

“Bye, sweetheart.”

“Goodbye, my love.”

Closing the door behind himself, he paused, shook his head in disbelief and relief, and then headed down the corridor with the smile still on his lips. A door near the stairs opened and John’s head peered out, eyes tired but wide.

“Hey, is she okay? I heard you’d brought her over, and I thought I heard somethin’ goin’ on last night.”

Arthur nodded as he paused, shrugging. “Yeah...” He still couldn’t quite believe what he was about to say. “... Yeah, she’s, she’s awake and fine, talkin’. A little weak, I think, but fine.”

A wide smile broke across John’s features as he clapped him on the back. “Jesus Christ, that’s great!”

Arthur chuckled as he ran his hand through his hair. “I know, I know...” His smile faded, however, as he recalled her earlier words. Lowering his voice, he continued, “... But, uh... She wants to go home but I don’t think the doc’ will allow it. I said we’d talk about it after eatin’. She’s desperate to but I don’t see how I can persuade him.”

John exhaled a breath as he kept his voice low, too. “Yeah, Sadie’ll probably want to move on, too, but I don’t think he’s gonna let either of ‘em go, and I kinda agree with him.”

Arthur nodded, half of him, which the other half called traitorous, agreeing as well. “I know, I know... Anyway, you want anythin’ from the store?”

“Nah, I’m okay, thanks. Charles and I bought some stuff last night.”

“All righ’. Well, get Charles and Sadie, if she’s okay, and go to our room, it’s unlocked. We’ll all talk.”

“Okay. And, hey...” He stopped the older man before he continued on, a smile pulling at his lips. “... She’s okay.”

Arthur smiled, nodding a few times. “She’s okay.”

Valentine was it’s usual quietly bustling self, the day not yet reaching noon. He moved down the steps at the front of the hotel onto the street, elation, relief and euphoria still swirling around in his chest. He didn’t care that people were still staring and whispering, most, even though they didn’t know them, smiling to themselves at his obvious change in demeanour and what was the cause of it.

The woman was okay.

The general store owner even asked him outright how they were all doing, and he indulged him in saying they were all fine, though nothing more. He was suddenly reminded once again why he and Ada didn’t live near a town or city, and how grateful he was that Nathaniel and Martha didn’t intrude upon their land unless they were invited.

Nodding his thanks at the owner, he gathered the tins and packets of fruit into his arms and headed out into the cold light of the sun. Their horses were nowhere to be seen, but they wouldn’t be far, grazing probably or resting under a tree. He could hear metal striking metal again, and the butcher by the hotel calling out today’s prices for—

He paused on the porch, inches from the steps.

Charles and Dr. Wallace were hurrying up the stairs to the hotel, Charles talking quickly to him as he took the lead, looking back over his shoulder every couple of seconds. Unease was written across every inch of both their features.

Arthur's stomach dropped.

The cans tumbled out of his arms, colliding with wood and rolling down the steps into the mud, and he was down the stairs and about to sprint across the street when a horse suddenly whinnied loudly to his right. His head whipping to the side, he had to quickly stumble backwards as a rider trotted by, tutting at him.

“Watch where you’re goin’, pal!”

Ignoring him, Arthur ran, nearly slipping in the mud. Two men sat on the hotel porch stared at him as he approached, their conversation trailing off as he ran past them. He startled the hotel owner, too, when he stormed in, leaving the door open.

“Uh, sir—”

He ignored him, sprinting up the stairs, taking two, three at a time.

He could hear raised voices coming from their room, only able to distinguish them when he reached the top step.

“No!” Sadie was shouting over whoever was trying to calm her down, their voice low and soothing. “No! Don’t you touch me!”

She sounded truly angry, and his heart twisted.

No, no, no, no, no, no...

The door was open and he stepped in and—

He froze, hands gripping the frame and door handle to physically stop himself.

Everyone in the room paused, staring at him. Charles, Dr. Wallace, John, Sadie, Sheriff Daniel and... Ada.

She was sat up, leaning back against the headboard, her brow dipping.

“Arthur?”

“Uh, hey...” His gaze went from her to Sadie who, sat on the edge of the bed, was trying to slap the growing increasingly frustrated Wallace’s hands away from her torso, to the Sheriff who was leaning against the wall by the window close to them, arms folded across his chest.

“Hey, Arthur,” he greeted with a light smile.

Arthur cleared his throat as his hands dropped, trying to recover as swiftly as he could. “Sheriff Daniel. What a surprise.”

He resisted the urge to glance at the rest of them because what the hell was going on.

Daniel inclined his head. “My apologies for droppin’ by without invitation but I wanted to see how Mrs Adler and your wife were doin’. I’m relieved to see they’re both okay.”

“Yeah, they’re gettin’ there, it seems.” Arthur looked to Wallace, quickly nodding at him in greeting. “Doc’.”

The doctor was unhappy, his lips pressed together. “Arthur. You should have come for me this morning, their wounds need cleaning and redressing. Both of them.”

Sadie snorted. “Yeah, whatever, I’m fine.”

Wallace fixed his gaze on her, his eyebrows high. “Do you want an infection, Mrs Adler? Do you want to die?”

“Oh, this ain’t gonna kill me, you’ve patched up worse, Wallace.”

Arthur had thought Doctor Wallace quite the unflappable man, but it seemed Sadie Adler was his limit.

He was quietly verging on apoplectic as he stepped towards her once more. “Mrs Adler, just let me help you, please—”

Sadie stood, veering out of his reach, and placed her hands on her hips as she moved to stand by the bedside table. “Dan, you said you had somethin’ to tell us when Arthur got here?”

They all fell silent, except Wallace who was muttering under his breath.

Arthur did glance away this time, looking to the nearest person, Charles, who was stood by the chest of drawers behind Daniel. Charles just raised his eyebrows slightly, as surprised as he was.

His gaze returned to the Sheriff as Daniel nodded, his arms dropping, one hand going into his pocket.

“That I did. I just wanted to let y’all know that my boys went out to Hagen.” 

Shit.

Sheriff Daniel looked around the room at them all now, giving Arthur the opportunity to glance at Charles again and John, now, who was to his left. They were incredibly still, though he’d bet their hearts had started beating just as fast as his was.

Shit... Fuck...

Daniel's expression was giving no indication of his thoughts as he continued. “They found some bodies up there, at a campsite. Seems like there was a mighty fight.”

His eyes landed on Arthur as he finished.

Arthur raised his eyebrows in faint surprise. “Does it? Well, Micah Bell seemed like the kind of feller with a lot of enemies.”

“Yeah.” Daniel held his gaze. “My boys gathered the bodies and burned ‘em, so, guess no one’s gonna get that reward.”

“Shame,” Sadie said, shaking her head as she folded her arms across her chest, the picture of disappointment.

“Yeah,” Daniel looked at her with an easy smile that was so familiar to his face. “Well, just thought y’all would be interested to know.” Tipping his hat, he met each of their eyes in turn. “Good day to you all, I’ll leave you to it.”

“Yeah, thanks, good day, Sheriff,” Arthur said as stepped aside to allow him to pass, managing to not look as incredibly relieved as he felt.

Silence lingered in the room as they all listened to the sound of Sheriff Daniel’s boots disappearing down the hall and stairs, then his faint, cheerful farewell to the hotel owner, before the front door was closed.

Wallace, who had been rifling through his bag and muttering to himself still, hadn’t noticed the other occupants of the room glancing at one another with eyebrows raised high and mouths slightly open.

Well, I’ll be damned... Arthur thought, scratching at his forehead before his fingers ran through his hair.

‘Lucky’ didn’t quite seem to cover it.

Their expressions quickly neutralised as Wallace sighed and moved to Charles, shoving bandages, cloths and a small bottle of clear liquid into his hands.

“Here. You seem like the most sensible person in this room, Mr Smith, so I will entrust you with these. Make sure their wounds are cleaned and freshly dressed and that they eat and drink something.”

Lifting his bag, he turned a stern eye on the two women. “Please rest, both of you. I shall return later in the day.”

“Yep, will do, can’t wait,” Sadie answered jovially as Wallace strode across the room to the door.

Arthur murmured his thanks to him and earned a small nod before the doctor exited. Closing the door behind him, Arthur leaned back against it and folded his arms across his chest as he blew out a breath.

They all seemed to release a breath of their own, Sadie’s arms dropping, John resting an elbow on the chest of drawers beside him, Charles placing the bandages, cloths and bottle on the end of the bed, Ada’s shoulders slumping.

He gazed at her, allowing his heart to resume its normal pattern. Fucking Christ, he’d thought he’d lost her again. He was about to move closer when John chuckled.  

“Wow, guess your boyfriend ain’t so bad after all, Sadie.”

Sadie tutted, narrowing her eyes at him. “He ain’t my boyfriend, John Marston.”

“Sure, sure...”

Arthur joined John in his laughter, and it felt damn good to do so. Ada was also smiling, glancing up at Sadie and earning a narrowed stare herself, though her own lips were twitching.

Arthur’s gaze lingered on Ada’s smile, and then she was looking at him and it was widening.

“So, when can we leave?”

The words, so few, knocked the wind out of him, his smile fading. The others fell silent, too, John probably having told them what Wallace had said, or just guessing.

Clearing his throat quietly, he answered gently, “Ada, the doc’ says we can’t for a little while.”

She’d sensed the shift in the air. Glancing briefly to Sadie, Ada was still, her hands in her lap.

“How long?”

He paused for a moment. “Few days, at least.”

“A few days?” Her stricken expression made his chest ache. “Arthur, we said to Thom and Charlotte we’d be gone for two, they’ll start to worry—”

“I know, but the doc’ ain’t gonna allow it, you were barely on your feet yesterday and—”

“I’m fine now. Yes, it’ll need cleaning and changing but we can do that at home!”

“Darlin’—”

“What about Millie?”

Arthur looked at her as their daughter’s name hung in the air, and she stared back. The others were silent, either staring at the floor or their hands. 

He knew that bringing Millie up wasn’t an unfair insinuation that he’d hadn’t thought of her, that she was actually just angry and tired and anxious. Arthur unfolded his arms, his hands raising slightly before they dropped to his sides.

“Ada, I... I wanna see her, too. I know you know that. But it ain’t gonna help matters by rushin’ back when you ain’t well enough—”

“But I am—”

“I can ride out there.”

Their eyes darted to Charles. The man nodded as he looked between them, shrugging slightly.

“I’ll go, let them know.”

“You would do that?” Arthur asked quietly after a moment of silence, feeling like another weight was being lifted from him.

Charles smiled. “Of course.”

Arthur looked to Ada who licked her lips, her eyes shining as her voice caught in her throat slightly. “Millie can’t know what’s happened, none of them can. Thom would...” She paused for a couple of moments before shaking her head. “... I don’t want them to worry, and we should be the ones to tell them. Just say that...” She glanced at Arthur who nodded. “... Just say we’ve decided to stay at John and Abigail’s for another day or so, that you left early as you have to be somewhere. I’ll write something so they know we sent you. They know you by name but... just in case.”

Their friend nodded, looking between the two desperate, grateful parents again. “Okay, I’ll just get my things.”

“Thank you, Charles,” Ada murmured and he smiled at her again as he crossed the room.

Arthur placed his hand on his arm as he went to pass him, making him pause, and murmured his own, “Thank you, I can’t tell you what this...”

He trailed off, unable to express the enormity of his gratitude with words alone.

Charles understood, and patted his shoulder before he headed out of the room.

Running a hand down his mouth, Arthur’s hands then settled on his belt as his attention returned to Ada. She was already looking at him, eyes still shining, lips slightly pressed together as she tried to hold back her tears.

“Arthur, where’s the food?”

He blinked at Sadie’s voice, taking a second to figure out what she was talking about.

Oh... Shit.

“Oh, uh, I’ll get it. I was about to get it and then I saw the Doc’ and Charles headin’ over here and, uh...” He glanced at Ada, catching her lips pressing together a little more firmly as she realised what he must have thought. “... I’ll get it now, I won’t be long.”

“Can you get me some paper and a pen from the front desk, too?” Ada’s voice managed not to crack or catch, and he nodded, giving her a tender smile.

“Sure.”

He brought them to her, after retrieving the cans from the mud and quickly wiping them clean, and she wrote a jovial a message as she could as Sadie sat beside her and ate, as did John, leaning by the window. She wrote about what great fun they were having but they missed them and would be home soon. Folding it over once she’d finished, she held the note out to Arthur with a faint smile.

“Well, this’ll have to do.”

He crossed the room from where he’d been leaning against a chest of drawers, watching her, and took it. She was about to drop her hand when he caught it and raised it, lowering his head at the same time. Pressing a gentle kiss to the back of her hand, he straightened and held it for a few moments longer as he spoke.

“We’ll be home soon, sweetheart.”

All she could do was nod.

He found Charles by a group of trees by the church, his horse grazing on the lush, green grass.

The man mounted as he approached and gathered the reins, turning his horse towards him.

“I’ll be back tonight,” he said, tucking the note into a pocket inside his coat. “Anything you want me to bring for you?”

Arthur shook his head, hands sliding into his pockets. “Nah, it’s fine. Just... see how my little girl’s doin’. And thank you. Again.”

Charles took the hand he offered, shaking it firmly with a sincere nod. “Anytime, Arthur. Anytime.”

Arthur watched him ride away down the muddy path towards the train station. From there he’d head east and it’d just be straight roads to Newfields Rest. It’d take three, four hours at most... So close and yet so far from their daughter.

Turning away, Arthur’s hand returned to his pocket as he exhaled a breath.

Nah, don’t think about any of that now...

When he returned to the room, Ada was alone. She smiled instantly at the sight of him, her features softening, blankets pulled up to her stomach as she leaned back against the pillows.

“Hey,” he murmured as he closed the door behind himself. “Where’d everybody go?”

She played with the frayed end of a blanket as she watched him shrug his coat off. “John went to have a bath, Sadie’s decided to take a nap.”

He rolled his sleeves up as he glanced at the fire. Someone had built it higher, making the room rather warm. “She get that wound cleaned?”

Ada’s lips twitched up a little higher. “In the end. It took some manipulating on my part.”

He arched an eyebrow, unsuccessfully trying to stop a smile as he moved closer. “That so?”

“I’m not proud of it, but yes. I said something along the lines of how I want her to live to meet my daughter.”

Arthur exhaled a laugh as she shifted her legs over slightly so he could sit on the edge of the bed. “That was a dirty move, Mrs Morgan.”

She pulled a slight face, the smile still lingering faintly on her lips. “Yes, it was. But it wasn’t exactly untrue.”

He nodded a few times, his hand settling over hers. She turned it over, their palms resting against each other, and gripped his hand a little tighter.

“Has Charles gone?” she murmured, and he nodded again, his thumb brushing against hers.

“Yeah. Said he’d be back by tonight.”

She didn’t say anything, gazing down at their hands. Neither of them wanted to talk about what they were feeling. His gaze drifted to the small bottle and cloth beside her, bandages neatly coiled beside it.

Gently pulling his hand away, he reached for the cloth and bottle. “C’mon, let’s get your own wound cleaned, huh?”

She dutifully pulled her shirt up above the bandages and sat up to give him room to unwind them. He’d shifted forward a little more to do so, and her head gently leaned against his, her eyes closing. Listening to her breathe softly, he unwound and unwound, finally pulling it away and dropping it to the floor. She lifted her head and lay back again with a wince, her hands keeping her shirt up.

Pouring some of the liquid onto a cloth, he began to dab at the wound. She hissed in a sharp breath through her teeth, her nose scrunching up, and he glanced up at her, watching her press her lips together as she exhaled a breath.

“Sorry,” he murmured, his other hand settling on her thigh.

“It’s fine. Just stings a little.” She gave him a soft smile. “How does it look?”

“Good. I mean, I ain’t a doctor but it looks good.”

It had startled him, the night before, how strange the wound was, not as circular as he’d imagined, but ragged and uneven, which was probably due to how Wallace had had to dig the bullet out. He’d stitched it very well, though, so neatly, and even though the bruising around it made it look worse, Arthur trusted that Wallace had done a fine job.

Gently sweeping the cloth over the stitching, after a few moments he felt her hand settle over his other.

“Arthur, we have to get back before those letters are delivered.”

He met her gaze, moving the cloth away, his forearm resting on his thigh. “I know, but—”

“Please, Arthur, it’s not far.” Her fingers squeezed around his. “I want to recover at home.”

He nodded a few times, his gaze dropping as he took in a long breath. He could have just repeated what Wallace had told him, told her no, that she had to stay put and rest, that that would be for the best, but... He couldn’t have ever done that, not knowing her and loving her as he did.

Tilting his head slightly, he looked up at her, his voice quiet. “’spose we could... get a wagon, I could put some blankets in it, you could lie down, might make it easier.”

Hope brightened her eyes as her lips lifted, squeezing his hand again. “That’ll work, that’ll do.”

“I’ll talk to the doc’, see what he says.” He swept his thumb over her knuckles as she pressed her lips together, his features softening. “You know we can’t go without his blessin’.”

“I know.” She pulled her hand from his and cupped his face, her smile tender. Stroking her thumbs over his cheekbones, she gazed at him as her smile widened a little more. “You could always show him how big and tough you are.”

He chuckled, arching an eyebrow as he tucked a curl behind her ear. “I think it’d really disappoint Dan if I did that.”

“Hmm, that’s true. And he’s become such a great friend.”

His chuckle was muffled by her lips meeting his. The kiss was soft and tender, his hand moving to cup the back of her neck to keep her close. She hummed lightly, and it stirred something within him, his other hand releasing the cloth and settling on her waist. She took that as an invitation she was ready to accept, her tongue touching against his lips until they parted and she met his tongue.

His fingers tangled into her hair, and she hummed again, the sound full of longing. Christ, he wanted her. He wanted to feel his wife, to hear the sounds she only made for him, to take them away from here for a little while, to—

Three sharp knocks sounded on the door.

The kiss swiftly ended, their eyes darting to the door, but their hands remained on one another.

“It’s me,” Sadie called a moment later, sounding disgruntled.

They shared a look, smiles pulling at their lips even as disappointment lingered in their eyes. Her hands went to her lap as his took up the cloth again and doused it in more liquid.

“Come in,” he called.

The door opened instantly, Sadie entering with the corners of her mouth turned down.

“Can’t fuckin’ sleep with all them people talkin’ and wagons and horses...”

After closing the door behind herself, she strode across the room, kicking her boots off, and climbed onto the bed behind Arthur, settling close to the wall with her arms folded across her chest.

Arthur met Ada’s gaze again as he gently wiped a few more times at the stitches, both of them trying to stifle their grins, and Ada cleared her throat.

“Is your room on the front?”

“Yeah,” she grumbled, adjusting her head on the pillow. “Like a damn circus out there.”

“Well, make yourself at home.” Arthur folded the cloth and placed it on the bedside table along with the bottle. 

“Oh, I will.”

Ada leaned forward again as Arthur picked the fresh bandages up, and he wound them around her, covering the wound, and tied it securely. He brushed his thumb lightly over it, a small gesture of affection, and Ada smiled, mouthing her thanks. He settled her shirt back in place with a nod, and then stood with a groan.

“All righ’, I won’t be long.”

Sadie cracked an eye open. “Where you goin’?”

He pulled his coat on once more, raising his eyebrows. “To see the doc’.”

She snorted, her eye closing. “Ugh, tell ‘im I did as I was told. I’m sure it’ll make his damn day.”

Arthur caught Ada’s expression as he headed for the door, and knew she was thinking exactly the same as him.

I sure hope it does put him in a good mood.

—

“Doc’?”

Wallace turned from the cabinet he was arranging at Arthur’s voice and the bell above the door tinkling. 

“Arthur, good afternoon.”

“Hello, sir.”

Arthur closed the door behind him, keeping the bitter cold out, as Wallace nudged a bottle into place before closing the cabinet and turning his full attention to him. 

“How is your wife?”

“Fine, thank you. She’s eaten a little and I got that wound cleaned.”

Wallace nodded, moving towards the store counter. “Good, that’s very good. And Mrs Adler, dare I ask?”

Arthur couldn’t stop a smile from pulling at his lips. “Yeah, her, too. She’s takin’ a nap righ’ now.”

“Ah, a miracle,” the doctor answered drily. Rifling through some papers on the counter, he glanced up at Arthur and paused, watching the man hesitate. “What is it?”

Arthur’s jaw moved as he hesitated again. “... Ada wants to go home.”

Wallace sighed, straightening. “Sir—”

“Look, I know, I know,” Arthur interjected, holding a hand out. “But we got a little girl and we ain’t been away from her, ever, so we really wanna get back to her.”

“I understand that but—”

“We don’t live too far away, only out by Emerald Ranch. If I, if I got a wagon, I could lay her down in it, go slow, it’s flat roads all the way there.”

Wallace was, as far as Arthur could see, unmoved. “Arthur—”

It made him feel somewhat desperate. “Please, doc’. She ain’t gonna even try to get better if she can’t see her daughter, trust me.”

Silence fell.

The doctor looked at him, his jaw moving slightly. “The melancholy that overcame her last night, and that’s happened before, do you believe it would return and worsen?”

Arthur nodded. “Yeah. Last night ain’t the worst it’s been and... like I said, she ain’t gonna try if she can’t see her.”

Wallace exhaled a breath, the sound close to a sigh. Seconds ticked by before he spoke again.

“I’ve passed through Emerald Ranch before, they have a doctor there, don’t they?”

Arthur managed to hide his surprise, and the small glimmer of hope that was growing. “Uh, yeah. He’s mostly there for the animals, but he’s good with people, too. Helped my wife when she gave birth.”

The other man nodded once. “All right, I’ll allow it.”

Relief flooded through him as he released a breath, but Wallace was already raising a finger, eyebrows high.

“But you go tomorrow and slow and you will have to be the voice of reason, sir, no matter how much it breaks your heart. If you need to stop because she’s in pain, you stop, don’t let her persuade you to continue.”

Arthur nodded several times. “Yes, sir. Thank you—”

“And it’s on you if anything happens to her.”

That dimmed some of his joy, his throat bobbing as he nodded again. “I know.”

 Something already has happened that’s on me.

“And...” Wallace’s finger was still raised, expression stern and resolute. “... only if she can get out of that bed, down the stairs and to the saloon for a proper meal.”

Oh, shit...

He’d planned on carrying her down to the wagon, if permission had been granted. Even just sitting up had given her some pain, so moving by herself...

Managing to hide his apprehension, he inclined his head. “Yes, sir, I’ll make sure we have dinner there tonight.”

“All right.” Wallace lowered his hand, returning to his papers, his gaze dropping. “The same for Mrs Adler, too. Though I doubt she’ll heed any of my professional opinions.”

—

"I think I’m gonna go down to South America.”

Sadie popped a peach segment into her mouth as she nodded, licking her lips before continuing.

“It’s wild there but, less mean, I guess. Think I’ll run protection for a gold mine or somethin’ or take up with a handsome revolutionary, I don’t know.” She smiled, shaking her head. “Just wanna see somethin’ else.”

Ada gazed at her with a smile, chewing on a grape. The moment the door had closed behind Arthur, Sadie had continued talking, about the noise, about how small this town was, and now to the current topic; what was next.

“That sounds wonderful. I hope you’ll write to me, and visit, if you can.”

Sadie grinned, meeting her gaze. “I’d love to.”

“Good. And I suppose you’ll have to visit here again, too...” Ada’s lips twitched at Sadie’s frown. “... That Sheriff Daniel’s quite a feller, very handsome...”

Sadie released a laugh, wiping peach juice from her mouth with the back of her hand. “Ha, yeah. He came over yesterday and this mornin’ before he came in here, won’t stop askin’ me how I am, if I’m all right, if I need anythin’...” She finished in a faux love-sick voice, making Ada laugh.

“You mean like a decent person would?”

The blonde woman snorted. “Yeah, but he gets these moony eyes when he looks at me.”

Ada grinned, arching an eyebrow. “Certainly seems like he could duel a revolutionary.”

“Now I’d like to see that!”

They laughed, and Arthur’s smile widened at the sound of it as he opened the door and entered. They looked to him, laughter trailing off as their smiles lingered, and he raised his hands as he pushed the door closed with his boot.

“Doc’ says we can go tomorrow.”

He hadn’t thought it possible, but Ada’s smile widened, her eyes lighting up. “What? Really?!”

“Yeah,” he chuckled, leaning against the chest of drawers as Sadie patted her arm, grinning. “I just gotta find a wagon and, uh...” He trailed off slightly, clearing his throat. “... And you just gotta get up and go across to the saloon for a meal.”

Her smile froze, her brow dipping. “... Really?”

“Yeah.” His thumb and forefinger rubbed together, a strange, nervous sensation in his chest.

There was the slightest of pauses before her eyebrows raised as she shrugged. “Well. I can do that.”

“Yeah.” He felt like an idiot, repeating himself so damn much. Making his lips rise a little higher, he glanced at Sadie, her smile gone, though she quickly reformed it. “We’ll have dinner there tonight, all of us.”

“Sounds good,” the blonde woman answered, keeping her tone light.

His gaze returned to Ada and he caught it before she could smother it; her apprehension.

“Well...” She smiled lightly as she adjusted her shoulders on the pillow. “I think I’ll join Sadie and take a nap until then.”

“All righ’, sweetheart. I’ll go see where John is, and see about a wagon.” He paused, glancing at Sadie again, and thankfully found that she’d closed her eyes. His features softening, he met Ada’s gaze and mouthed, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she mouthed back with a softer smile, her fingers lacing together.

He left them to their rest, quietly closing the door on his way out and heading to John’s room. There was no response to his knock, and the door was locked, so Arthur assumed he was out somewhere, eating, still bathing or tending to his horse. He should probably do the same.

Finding Noka and Titan near the stables, grazing on a pile of hay that had been left there, he murmured lowly to them, soothing them and stroking their faces. Retrieving a brush from his saddlebag, he brushed them down, taking his time with the task. It was John who found him a short while later, leading his horse, Rachel, by the reins and carrying a bucket of oats in his other hand. They tended to the horses together, taking the time to clean and polish the saddles, too, while talking about the prospect of going home tomorrow and where they might be able to find a wagon.

After they’d finished, they strolled around the town, enquiring. The general store owner directed them to a man at the saloon by the church, who directed them to another man there, who directed them to the tents by the stables. After some negotiating, a Dutch man sold them a wagon, that was just big enough for someone to lie down in, for more than it was worth but the wheels were sturdy and it had the space needed and that’s all Arthur cared about. They used Titan to pull the wagon around to the front of the hotel, asking the owner if they could leave it there. He agreed, for a small fee, and afterwards they went up to John’s room where they divided the Blackwater spoils between the five of them.

Arthur still couldn’t believe it, his gaze travelling over the shining bars, coins and jewellery as he held wads of bills in his hands. He felt strange, finally holding it, owning it. He’d thought about that job, the one out of many that had gone so wrong, over the last few years. Had that been the turning point? Dutch had killed a woman then, and it had unsettled him and the others but... Well, things had just carried on, hadn’t they? Pushing the thoughts from his mind, he tucked his and Ada’s share into one of the saddlebags John had carried the loot down in, telling himself what good the money could do now.

Yes, he could build that stable, take on more horses, earn more of his honest income, and buy more materials for Ada so she could expand her own business, more books and clothes for Millie, some could even go to Thom and Charlotte, they wanted to build on their land...

Yes, it could do some good now.

John joined Arthur when he returned to the general store, buying some food and ammunition for himself while Arthur bought himself a new pair of gloves, and a new pair of trousers, coat, corset and a shirt for Ada. They sat on the hotel porch afterwards with their packages, saddlebags full of gold at their feet, watching the sun slowly go down and talking idly about the weather and what it might mean for each of their crops.

If us ten years ago could see us now, Arthur though, a smile pulling at his lips.

With the sun disappearing, the air became even colder and they headed inside to their rooms, agreeing to regroup in half an hour to make their way to the saloon. Arthur patted John on the back as he paused at his door, fishing his key out of his pocket, and Arthur continued on to his own. He listened for a moment to hear if the two women were talking, but there was just silence.

Quietly opening the door, he met Ada’s gaze, and found she was alone, again, though half of her hair was now tied back in a braid.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Shutting the door, he was grateful that someone, most likely Sadie, had stoked the fire, the room warm without being overbearing.

“Where’s Sadie?” he asked as he placed the package on the chest of drawers and the saddlebag at the base of it.

“Gone to take a bath. I don’t know how she’s going to do it on her own but, well, that’s Sadie, isn’t it.” She smiled, twisting her wedding band around her finger as she watched him approach.

He nodded at her, sitting on the edge of the bed and placing his hand on the mattress on the other side of her legs. “She do your hair?”

“Yeah.” Her smile widened a little more as she ran her fingers over the lower half. “We both couldn’t sleep for long so we had to occupy ourselves somehow.”

“It’s pretty.” The corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled, watching her try to suppress her own.

“Thank you, Mr Morgan.”

It always amused him when, despite having murmured to her the most sensual, sinful things, a simple compliment made a pink tinge rise on her cheeks. Chuckling, he tilted his head, his fingers brushing against her thigh.

“I said to John we’d meet in half an hour. You wanna get changed now?” He said it gently, and she only paused for a moment, her fingers still twisting together.

“Sure. Into what, though, I don’t know.”

“Well, I bought you these...” Patting her thigh as he rose, Arthur moved to the chest of drawers and returned to his place with the package, placing it on his lap. Pulling the string that held it together away, he unwrapped the clothing and held them up for her.

She took the cream shirt and corset and grey trousers and brown coat, inspecting them as her smile returned and grew. “These are lovely, thank you.” 

“You’re welcome. You know I’d prefer you naked but I think that’d get us kicked out.”

She laughed, running her fingers over the material for a few moments, before she exhaled a breath and met his gaze.

“All right, let’s get this over with.”

He stood, not saying a word, and took the clothes from her, placing them at the foot of the bed. Pushing the blankets off of herself, he heard the long, quiet breath she inhaled. Turning back to her, he held his hands out. Ada glanced up at him as she placed her hands in his and used the grip to sit up. He watched her lips press together and the muscles in her jaw move, a sign her teeth were gritting, though she only made a faint sound as she slid her legs off the bed, setting her feet on the floor.

Their eyes locked again as they paused, and then, when she nodded, he gently pulled her up. She released another sound, a short, sharp hiss that made his chest tighten, but they didn’t stop. In fact, he didn’t stop pulling her until not only was she on her feet but in his arms. Wrapping them around her gently, he held her against him as she exhaled short, steadying breaths, her own arms going around him and gripping onto the back of his coat.

“You okay?” he murmured against her ear, and she nodded, blowing out another breath.

“Yeah. Just give me a minute.”

He held her up as she breathed and found her strength, thanking God that, even though she needed to lean against him, she wasn’t swaying or shaking. His fingers stroked at the base of her spine, cheek leaning against the top of her head. Finally, she pulled her head back and gave him a small smile, hands holding onto the sides of his coat.

“Well.”

“Well?” he prompted gently.

“Legs are a little stiff and I don’t think I’ll be able to move my torso that much, but fine.”

“Oh, only those two things, huh?” He arched an eyebrow which made her exhale a laugh, shrugging her shoulders.

“Yeah, just those two tiny things. Other than that, completely fine.”

“All righ’, I’d say you’re ready to run all the way home, then.”

She laughed, and he gazed down at her, patting her back lightly as he smiled.

“C’mon, then, let’s get this done.” 

He helped her out of the trousers first, pulling them down her legs, crouching and letting her grip his shoulder for balance as she lifted a leg at a time to allow him to tug them away over her feet. Then the new trousers went on, her legs lifting again, and he slid them up to her waist, buttoning them carefully before he helped her slip her feet into her boots.

Next was the removal of her torn and bloodied shirt and corset. He threw them into a corner before gliding his finger tips down her back, the gentle action making her arch slightly, her lips twitching.

“Concentrate, Mr Morgan...” she murmured as his fingers came up over her shoulders and down to her chest, hovering over her breasts.

“Yes, ma’am.”

The corset was soft and easy to tie, his chin resting on the top of her head as his hands secured it at her back. Helping her pull the shirt on one arm at a time, he adjusted the collar before buttoning it from the bottom up.

He glanced up at her every few moments, finding her eyes on him, and brushed his finger between her breasts before he finished buttoning up to her collarbones. Lastly, he helped her with the coat, smoothing down the collar.

“That all righ’?” he murmured, hands resting on her arms. “You comfortable?”

“Yeah, it’s perfect, thank you.” Her hands went to his chest, tracing over the buttons of his coat with a soft smile.

“You ready to go downstairs?”

“Sure.”

She pressed her lips together slightly, her smile faintly lingering. She was just as apprehensive as he was, he could tell, but they both knew if she did it, if she just went downstairs, crossed the street and had a meal, then they could go home.

He wished he could take away the pressure and the burden.

His hands moving up, he cupped her face, exhaling a breath as he gazed down at her.

“You can do it, darlin’. One step at a time.”

Ada nodded, leaning her head into his touch as one of his thumbs stroked across her cheek, smile gone. “One step at a time.” Licking her lips, she patted his coat, raising her eyebrows a little.

“Are you not gonna change?”

He shook his head as a corner of his mouth lifted. “Nah. No point if we’re goin’ home tomorrow.”

She stared at him.

He opened his mouth after a few moments of silence to speak when her hands went to his face and she drew his head down, capturing his lips in a firm kiss. He cupped the back of her head, returning it instantly as his eyes closed. His other went to her lower back, holding but not pressing her against him so he wouldn’t hurt her. She broke the kiss barely seconds later, but didn’t move, her eyes locking with his as they opened.

“I love you,” she said quietly, and his forehead rested gently against hers.

“I love you.”

Sniffing, she pressed another kiss to his lips before releasing him, visibly steeling herself.

“All right, let’s go.”

As she took his arm, he led her to the door, opening it and letting her step through first. He pocketed the key after locking it behind them, and he waited for her to move first, letting her lean on him as they moved down the corridor.

Arthur could feel how stiff she was, but she didn’t make a noise, didn’t complain. Upon reaching the stairs, though, his heart began to ache at her expression. 

She paused, staring down at them, and he could see her mind working, trying to figure out how best to do it. Clearing his throat, he took the first step down, holding out a hand to her. Her gaze shifted to him, and she smiled faintly. Taking his hand, she placed her other on the wall and stepped down. As they’d said, she took one step at a time, holding his hand tightly and wincing with every move.

“You all righ’?” he asked when she paused halfway down, blowing out a breath.

“Yeah, yeah... just a little sore.”

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask if she wanted to go back, but he already knew the answer.

After nearly a minute, she nodded and continued down. At the curve in the stairs that lay between her and the last four steps down, Arthur glanced to his left and saw the hotel owner, a kind smile on his lips.

“Here, ma’am...” He stepped forward, holding a hand out to her, and she accepted it with a gracious smile.

“Oh, thank you, that’s very kind.”

“It’s no trouble at all, ma’am. It’s mighty good to see you on your feet.”

Her smile lingered, though Arthur suspected it was to also hide her grimaces as she moved down the last couple of steps. Sweat was starting to shine on her brow and she already looked tired, the dark circles under her eyes so pronounced. This was a bad idea, he shouldn’t have let her do this—

Ada’s features lit up as she looked over Arthur’s shoulder, her hand falling from the hotel owner’s.

“Charles.”

He was about to look himself but she was already moving, her grip tightening on his hand, and he moved with her to the door, one hand on her back. She gripped the door handle and pulled it open, keeping a hold on it to steady herself as they gazed out. Charles was guiding his horse towards the post before the hotel porch, and at the sound of the door opening he looked up and smiled at them.

“Hey, you’re up.”

Ada’s smile was wide and hopeful as she stepped out onto the porch, her free hand moving to grip the doorframe, and she ignored his words.

“How are they, Charles?”

He dismounted and pulled the reins over his horse’s head, wrapping them around the post as looked up at them again. “They’re fine.”

The hand that was squeezing Arthur’s so tightly relaxed a little, and Arthur felt his shoulders do the same.

“Really?”

“Yeah. They didn’t seem to suspect anything.” Charles removed his gloves as he ascended the stairs, his smile returning. “I met Millie. She’s a lot like you, and you, Arthur. She’s very much your child.”

Ada’s voice cracked slightly as she asked, “She’s happy? She’s okay?”

“Yeah, she is.” Charles could see the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes as she exhaled, and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. “She misses you both, but she’s fine.”

Ada nodded several times as Arthur met his gaze and nodded his thanks, swallowing the lump in his throat.

“Thank you, Charles. Thank you so much,” Ada said quietly, and Charles squeezed her shoulder before dropping his hand.

“Anytime.” Looking them over, his eyebrows raising a little, he continued, “So, where are we goin’?”

Ada sniffed, smiling as she shrugged a shoulder. “Out to dinner, like regular folk.”

As Charles’s gaze dropped to where her wound was, Arthur cleared his throat. “Doc’ won’t let us go home unless she can get there and eat.”

“Ah.” The look he gave Arthur suggested they should have stayed put, and maybe in another time and place Arthur would have agreed with him at feeling Ada lean more heavily against him as time ticked by.

But, he just raised his eyebrows.

You try and tell this mother to get back upstairs.

Message received, Charles took in a breath, offering his arm to Ada as he turned.

“I’ll come, too, I’m starving.”

Arthur could have handed all his earthly possessions over to him right there and then. He caught Ada’s grateful smile to the man as she wrapped her hand around his arm, leaning some of her weight against him, and they moved together to the stairs. They helped her down, one at a time again, beads of sweat now sliding down her neck and pained sounds coming from the back of her throat as she gritted her teeth, but neither man said a word.

When she stepped down onto the muddy street, Arthur settled an arm around her waist to aid in keeping her torso as straight as possible. Thankfully no wagons or riders were coming down the street as they crossed it, so they could take their time, her steps small.

“Is Wallace watching?” she murmured.

“What?” Arthur asked gently, her words somewhat indecipherable due to her clenched jaw.

“Is Wallace watching from his office?”

Charles answered as he and Arthur glanced up with a quiet, "Yeah.”

And he was, gazing out of his window at them expressionlessly.

“Ooh, shit...” she sighed, her eyes on the ground.

Anyone and everyone could see she was in pain and, hell, Arthur was close to just sweeping her up into his arms and carrying her the rest of the way. Why the hell had Wallace ordered it? To deter her? To motivate her? Who was the winner here? No one, but maybe that was Wallace’s point.

It was the stairs up to the saloon that nearly undid it all. Arthur watched her stare at them, the wood illuminated by the warm lights that shone within.

“I don’t think I can do it,” she whispered in a voice so quiet both men were surprised they’d heard.

“You can, darlin’,” Arthur murmured, tucking a curl behind her ear. “This is the last thing, then you can sit down and we’re gonna have a real nice meal.”

Tears had returned to her eyes, perhaps from exhaustion, or frustration, or the unfairness of it all, or her desperate want to do it, most likely all four, and it broke his heart. Swallowing hard, she closed her eyes and a few tears slipped out, sliding down her cheeks. Charles was patting her back gently which seemed to only be making it worse, her teeth sinking into her lower lip to stop it from trembling.

“Hey, what’s goin’ on?”

Charles and Arthur looked up to see John and Sadie approaching from the hotel, Sadie a little slower, her arm wrapped around her stomach, hand against her side.

Arthur opened his mouth, but Ada answered, her voice breaking again.

“I’m trying to get up the damn stairs.”

“Yeah, gettin’ up them hotel ones nearly killed me,” Sadie muttered as they joined them, though Sadie didn’t stop as John did.

Instead, she moved halfway up the stairs with a groan and a curse, hissing her breaths in and out. Turning, she arched an eyebrow.

“But they didn’t kill me. You can do it, lady.”

Ada stared up at her, the corners of her mouth turned down, tears shining on her cheeks, and Sadie tilted her head.

“You can do it.”

“C’mon, Ada. S’just a couple of steps, ain’t nothin’,” John chimed in, a warm smile on his lips when she looked to him.

Her gaze returned to the stairs, and Arthur held his breath as he rubbed her lower back.

Then, she nodded.

Tightening his hold around her, Charles on her other side now holding her arm and hand, they ascended a step at a time with her. She gave a heart-wrenching groan halfway up, her features twisting with pain, but she didn’t stop until they reached the top. When they did, she released an almost gasped breath, as if she had been holding it in, and Arthur pressed a kiss to her head as the others smiled widely and cheered her. She was smiling herself, her eyes closing for a few moments.

“All right, let’s carry on, I need to sit down.”

Sadie and John held the saloon doors open for them, and they all ignored the quietening of the establishment as they entered. Sadie cleared two men away from a table by a window to their right just by jerking her thumb behind her, their chairs swiftly scraping back as they scrambled out of them. Arthur and Charles helped to lower Ada into a chair carefully, her brow dipping. Once seated, though, and leaning back, she exhaled a heavy, relieved breath, looking up at them both gratefully. Arthur kissed her head again as Charles patted her hand, and they both took a seat beside her, John and Sadie already seated.

A woman with strawberry-blonde hair hurried over from the bar, smile wide as conversations around them resumed. There were only two meals available, a lamb or beef stew, and they all ordered which one they preferred, John also ordering a bottle of whisky for the table.

He sat back as the woman hurried away back to the bar, shaking his head as he looked between them all with a smile.

“Look at you three. Who’d’ve guessed you were bleedin’ out a day ago.”

Sadie snorted, her hands resting on her stomach. “Seems like God’s got a sense of humour.”

“That he does!” John laughed as the woman returned with the bottle on a tray and a glass for each of them.

They quietened as she distributed them and mumbled a, “Let me know if you need anythin’ else...” before she was scurrying away again. John uncorked the bottle and poured them all a couple of fingers of whisky, leaving himself until last.

“Yeah, look at us all, huh,” Sadie said, surprising them with her quietness as John placed the bottle on the table. “We all really made it.”

“Yeah, we did,” Charles answered with a smile, fingers wrapped around his glass.

A silence descended upon the table as they shared in a moment without fear, worry or grief, the only thought being what was happening right now and of each other. Despite all the noise around them, despite all that had passed, they were just now a group of friends who’d shared all the joys and griefs that life had to offer. Eyes shone as they looked at one another, Ada squeezing Charles’s arm as Sadie smiled at Arthur and John.

The latter raised his glass, clearing his throat. “How about a toast?”

They all did the same, and tried to find the right words.

It was Arthur who announced, “To good friends, and a good life.”

“Good friends and a good life,” they repeated instantly, firmly and quietly.

Raising their glasses a little higher, they then drank to it, eyes still shining with gratitude.

Setting their glasses down, Sadie spoke first, folding her arms and clearing her throat.

“So, Charles, Canada next, is it?”

He smiled as he nodded, leaning a forearm on the table. “I think so. I know some people up there who might take me in for a little while, and there’s some good work up there...”

They listened to him, smiling fondly even as their hearts ached at the inevitable moving on of life, and Arthur felt Ada’s hand find his, lacing their fingers together and squeezing it gently.

Another bottle of whisky was ordered before they’d even finished their meals.

They talked and laughed like, as Ada had described them, regular folk, which they gathered they were now. As regular as they could be, anyway. They reminisced on places they’d been and people they’d known, funny little stories of everyday things that came to them in the moment. John and Arthur and Ada traded stories about parenthood as Charles and Sadie smiled and chuckled, and there was more than a fair amount of teasing towards Sadie about Sheriff Dan. She just waved it off, glancing at Ada as she drank with a secretive smile. Another bottle was ordered, and talk turned again to the future. Charles was set on Canada and would probably depart as soon as he’d heard word from his friends, Sadie was unsure and happy about it, John just wanted to get home to his family, and so did Arthur and Ada. Most of all, they all just wanted to live their lives.

Arthur, at catching Ada barely being able to keep her eyes open, announced that perhaps it was time for bed. They all agreed, chairs scraping back loudly, drawing the attention of the citizens of Valentine again, who were, again, ignored. John paid for the meals and drinks, waving off their insistences that they would pay him back.

Perhaps he’d feel a bit differently in the morning when his head was a little clearer, Arthur thought with a smile as he watched him stumble slightly on his way to the doors.

He and Charles helped Ada out and down onto the street again, though she was so exhausted and pained that once they were in the hotel Arthur lifted her and carried her up the rest of the way. Her head leaned against his shoulder as he bade a quiet goodnight to them all, John just waving with bleary eyes as Charles helped him into his room, while Sadie blew Ada a kiss with a grin before she entered her own.

Ada smiled sleepily at the gesture, waving her fingers, before she was carried into the room and Arthur pushed the door shut with his boot.

“All righ’... Careful...” Arthur murmured to himself as he lay her down as gently as he could.

A grateful smile was on her lips as he pulled back, and he stroked her hair away from her face tenderly.

“You okay?”

“Tired,” she answered, though her smile lingered.

“All righ’, gimme a minute...”

He stoked the dwindling fire before kicking his boots off and removing his coat. Leaving them on the floor, he rolled his sleeves up as he approached the bed and carefully pulled off her own boots, placing them on the floor. He went to remove her coat when she shook her head.

“No, leave it. I don’t think I can move again.”

Nodding, he stroked her cheek before climbing in beside her with a groan. Wrapping his arms around her gently, he pressed a lingering kiss to her temple. She hummed quietly, her hands settling over his arm, listening to the crackling of the fire.

“You don’t think Sheriff Daniel’s boys... You don’t think he did us a favour, do you?” she murmured after several moments, her head turning towards him slightly, the idea obviously having been playing on her mind.

Arthur took in a long breath, thumb brushing against her coat. “I think he’s a smart man. And a decent one...”

“So, yes?”

He exhaled a laugh. “I don’t know why he did it, but, Christ, am I glad.”

“Mmh, me, too.” She turned her head a little more, her nose brushing against his jaw. “I love you,” she whispered, just as she would say goodnight.

“I love you, too,” he murmured, his hand rising to stroke over her hair. And he didn’t know if it was the whisky, despite only having had a glass, or maybe he just needed it out of his head, but after pausing he mumbled, “You scared me yesterday.”

She pressed her fingers into his skin, squeezing his arm gently. “I’m sorry—”

“No, no, no, don’t you apologise,” he swiftly cut in, shaking his head. “I didn’t mean... I just thought you were...”

He gazed down at her as her fingers brushed against his cheek, her smile tender.

“It’s okay, Arthur.”

He swallowed, stroking his fingers over her hair again. “I nearly lost you, and it was my fault—”

“Shh... No, it wasn’t.”

Her fingers settled over his lips, silencing him, and he just held her gaze, not knowing how someone could love a person so much. As her fingers fell away, the backs of them stroking along his jawline, he cleared his throat quietly.

“You wanna talk about it?”

Ada’s lips lifted a little. “Yeah, and no.”

“Hm, I feel the same.”

Her brow suddenly dipped, her hand cupping his cheek. “How are you? I haven’t asked you that, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be... I... I don’t really know.” He shrugged slightly. “I’m okay. I... y’know...” He sighed, playing with a lock of her hair. “... The night before we went up the mountain, John and I, we made a pact, that that would be the last time we do anythin’ of the sort. We just wanna be with our families now, put all that behind us.”

“Well,” she smiled softly, eyes heavy with exhaustion and love. “It shouldn’t be too hard to do that now. We’re really free.”

A corner of his mouth lifted. “That we are.”

Licking her lips, she parted them, hesitating slightly. “Do you... Do you feel...”

He knew what she was trying to gently ask. His features softening, realising suddenly that it also must have been playing on her mind, he shook his head, his fingers splaying across her cheek and jaw.

“Nah, I don’t feel guilty or regret killin’ ‘im. I thought I would... I waited for it to come, but... nothin’. I always said revenge weren’t worth it, but... I didn’t do it out of revenge, I did it to protect you.”

Her jaw moved a little as she pressed her lips together, and he could see she was trying to stop the tears that were filling her eyes from falling. Lowering his head, he pressed a tender, lingering kiss to her lips.

Drawing back, he murmured, “You get some rest now, sweetheart.”

Watching her eyes close, long lashes resting against her cheeks, he stroked at her hair gently, soothingly, his own eyes not closing until he was sure she was asleep.

—

That sound of metal clanging against metal roused him, his legs stretching out slowly as he groaned.

Lifting a hand, he rubbed at his eyes with a yawn, trying to fight off the last remnants of sleep that were clinging to him. Running a hand through his hair, his arm then settled above his head on the pillow, his eyes opening. Tilting his head down, he found Ada still asleep, breaths soft and slow.

He watched her, not wanting to wake her yet. Yes, he was eager to get home, but he would absolutely not rush her. And who knew the toll last night’s excursion could have taken on her? A small voice in his head was yelling at him, telling him he should insist they stay so she could rest, Charles’s look when he’d returned coming back to him. But... he hadn’t been lying when he’d spoken to Wallace. She would recover more willingly at home, and the very last thing he wanted was for the dark, unshifting cloud of melancholy to descend.

Besides, Wallace wouldn’t really let them go if he didn’t deem it wise, and as long as he travelled slowly, cleaned her wound—

Shit, oh, fuck.

He’d completely forgotten to check the bandages last night. Pushing himself up, he pushed her coat apart and gripped her shirt, pulling it up as his breath caught in his throat... and then he exhaled.

There was some spots of blood, yes, but they were small.

“I hope that’s who I think it is, or my husband’s going to be very angry.”

Her light, sleepy tone startled him, his gaze darting up to her. She was looking at him, a smile on her lips. Dropping her shirt, he smoothed it down carefully, allowing a smile of his own to emerge.

“He sounds like the wrong sort to be with, ma’am.”

“Nah, he’s okay. A little grumpy but it grows on you.”

“Now I know I can tell the doc’ you’re better, that smart mouth has come back...”

She laughed huskily as he leaned down, pressing several, soft kisses to her lips, as her fingers tangled into his hair.

“You sleep okay?” he mumbled against her lips, his thumb stroking against her temple.

“Just fine. You?”

“Fine.”

“Good.”

He kissed her again, letting it linger before he pulled back, his hand resting against her waist. Her eyes were still tired, though they were a little brighter than yesterday, and she seemed brighter in general.

“You wanna get somethin’ to eat?”

She shook her head, raising her eyebrows slightly as she smiled. “Can we just go home?”

He desperately wanted to say yes as swiftly as he could, but Wallace’s words and Charles’s expression were still ruminating in the back of his mind.

“We’ll see if the other’s are up, then we gotta see the doc’... then yeah.”

Her smile widened, her fingers grazing down his neck, and he willed with all the might he had left in him for Wallace to allow them to leave. He kissed her once more, whether to reassure her or himself he didn’t know, and then he climbed off the bed, clapping his hands together.

“All righ’, let’s get outta here.”

They were out of the room in minutes. Having unpacked nothing and she being already dressed, all he had to do was help her with her boots before pulling his own on and his coat, and then help her get to her feet. She was stiffer but she rose quickly, gripping onto his biceps as she blew out a long breath.

“Okay?” he murmured after almost a minute, and received a nod in reply.

She leaned on his arm as they crossed the room and headed out, the saddlebag of Blackwater money over his other shoulder, shutting the door behind them. Moving down the hallway, they paused at John’s door, Arthur rapping his knuckles against it.

There was the sound of faint groaning, boards creaking, and then it was being pulled open, a rather bedraggled John Marston appearing, rubbing at his eyes.

“Well, good mornin’, sunshine,” Arthur greeted cheerfully, a somewhat delighted smile tugging at his lips. “You okay there?”

“Awh, shuddup...” John croaked, raking his hair back from his face. “What’s goin’ on?”

“We’re gonna go see the doc’ now, then if he says we can we’ll be headin’ home.”

John perked up slightly at that, his eyebrows raising. “Really? Shit, all righ’, I’ll change, see where Sadie ‘nd Charles are.”

“Okay, see you downstairs. Get yourself together, you look a mess.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah...” John muttered as Arthur’s smile widened. Looking to Ada, he gave as good a smile as he could. “Mornin’, Ada. You okay?”

“Morning, John,” she smiled, her tone full of affection. “I’m fine, thank you.”

“Good, good. Well, I’ll see ya down there.”

“All right, John, be careful.”

“Yeah, yeah...”

Arthur met her gaze as John closed the door with another groan, their smiles matching. Shaking his head, he led her down the rest of the hallway to the stairs. She got down okay, awkwardly and rigidly, gripping at his arm tightly, but a little better than the previous day. The hotel owner was behind his counter once again, smiling warmly. Did he ever sleep?

Charles had bought the rooms for a few days so they had no need to pay, and the owner promised he’d reimburse Charles when he saw him, if they left.

“I hope it’s good news for you,” he called as they headed out the door, and Arthur was once again reminded of why they didn’t live near a town.

Why the hell is everybody so interested in everybody else’s business.

“There it is, ma’am, your chariot,” he announced as they stepped onto the porch, nodding his head at the wagon below.

He hadn’t pointed it out to her yesterday, knowing, as she’d painfully crossed the street, that it would have been of little interest. Now, though, she gazed at it with pure delight.

“Oh, it’s perfect! Do we own it?”

“That we do. A nice little keepsake from our journey.”

She laughed, though the sound quickly morphed into a groan. “Stop making me laugh, it hurts every time.”

“Well, that’s your fault for marryin’ a funny man.”

“Oh, he’s funny all right.”

He side-eyed her, joy spreading through him at seeing her grin.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, c’mon, let’s just get you across the street.”

There were only the two steps up to the office, thankfully, and he knocked on the door before opening it, letting her pass through first.

“Doc’?”

Wallace’s head appeared around the door leading to the back, and at seeing them he stepped in, closing a notebook in his hands. “Arthur, Ada.”

“Doctor Wallace,” Ada greeted, smiling lightly, though Arthur could feel her grip on his arm tightening.

“How are you feeling today, Ada?”

“Fine. Sore, stiff, but fine.”

“Well,” Wallace said as he approached, placing his notebook down on a display table. “Let’s have a look, shall we?”

Arthur placed an arm around her back, his thumb stroking against her side gently, as Wallace lifted her shirt and inspected the bandages.

“A little bleeding, but not enough to be of concern...” Unwrapping the bandages, he placed them by his notebook before stooping to get a better look at the wound. “... Yes, there is also quite an amount of bruising, this area will be very sore and tender for a while...” Ada inhaled a quiet hiss as Wallace lightly touched his fingers around the area.“... The stitches have held, though, and your body seems to be taking its natural course in healing itself.” He then stood, his lips pressing together as he looked between them. “... As a result, I will allow you to return to your home.”

A wide smile spread across both their lips as they stared at him, talking over each other.

“Really? We can?”

“Thank you so much, Doc’—”

They paused as Wallace raised a hand.

“Don’t thank me yet. I’ll provide you with some tonics for the swelling and pain, they won’t taste very nice, and, Arthur, do you have the bottle I left with you yesterday, to clean the wound?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good, I’ll give you another.” He gestured at her torso. “I’ll clean this for you now and bandage it, of which I’ll give you some more of, too.”

“Thank you, Doctor Wallace, thank you so much,” Ada grinned, but Wallace had already walked away, heading into his back room.

Lifting her gaze, she met Arthur’s and he pressed a firm kiss to her temple, his hand rubbing her arm.

“We’re going home,” she whispered, and he smiled into her hair, closing his eyes.

Thank God... Thank God...

When he returned, Wallace made swift work of cleaning the wound and bandaging it up. Tying it neatly, he arched an eyebrow as he fixed his gaze on her.

“Now, Ada, please be careful. Once you’re home, rest. I’ll write to Emerald Ranch in a few days to see how you are. I look forward to your reply, and that of the doctor who resides there.”

Ada startled him slightly by reaching out and gripping his arm, her smile having not vanished. “Thank you, Doctor. Thank you very much.”

Inclining his head, Wallace patted her hand quickly. “You’re welcome.” Clearing his throat as her hand left him, he picked up a roll of bandages and two bottles from the table. “Take these and use them, please.”

“I will, I promise.” She took them one at a time and slipped them into her coat pocket, while Arthur cleared his throat.

“Here, Doc’.”

Out of the saddlebag he pulled a gold bar, and offered it to the man.

Wallace’s eyes widened. “Sir, this is too—”

“Please,” Arthur cut him off, holding it out a little further. “Take it.”

The doctor was silent, staring at him, and then he reached out and took it, holding it between his hands like it would shatter at any moment. Clearing his throat, he nodded at them. “Thank you.”

“Thank you.” 

Extending his hand to him, a corner of his mouth lifted as Wallace accepted it, shaking firmly.

Raising his eyebrows as he slid the bar into his pocket, Wallace released his hand. “Well, I hope neither of you take this the wrong way, but I hope I never see you again.”

Arthur’s lips lifted higher as Ada exhaled a laugh.

“You, too, Doctor.”

“Well, take care now.” Inclining his head again, he moved behind them to the door and held it open a little wider, giving them a small smile.

They gave another, grateful thanks, and then he was closing the door behind them. Standing on the porch, Arthur heard her take in a long breath. Gazing down at her, he patted her arm and exhaled.

“Well... Let’s head home, huh?”

“Yes, please,” she grinned, just simply unable to contain it.

Moving down the steps, they saw John leaning against the wagon, rubbing at his forehead with a yawn, and Sadie and Charles sat on the porch. Noka and Titan were beside it; John or Charles had probably brought them over from wherever they were. They were standing idly, tails swishing—

“Arthur!”

Their heads turned at the call as they stopped, Ada’s fingertips pressing firmly into his coat for a moment, before their eyes fell on Sheriff Daniel, watching him approach, his hand raised. Falling, it went to his belt, holding onto it.

“Hey.” The easy, warm smile was on his face, and they returned it.

“Good morning, Sheriff,” Ada replied, and Arthur felt her lean some more of her weight against him, starting to tire already.

“Good mornin’ to you both. Headin’ home?”

“Yep, Doc’ just gave us the word now.”

Daniel looked genuinely delighted at Arthur’s answer. “I’m mighty pleased to hear it. I can escort you outta town if you like?”

“Nah, that’s kind of you but we’ll be okay.”

“All right, well, you have a safe journey home now.”

He offered his hand and Arthur took it, shaking it just as firmly and sincerely as he had Wallace’s.

“Thank you. Thank you for everything you’ve done.”

Daniel just smiled. “My pleasure.”

Tipping his hat at Ada with a quiet, “Ma’am,” he then continued on down the street, heading down towards the stables.

Arthur noticed Ada smiling at Sadie as they headed on towards them, Sadie just rolling her eyes.

Well, I ain’t got the time nor energy to get into that.

“Are we free?” Sadie asked drily, though they all knew Wallace would never bother telling her what to do now.

“Yeah, we’re headin’ home.”

Arthur chuckled as John whooped and Charles clapped his hands together as he stood, Sadie also getting to her feet with a muttered, “Thank the Lord...”

“Hell yeah, we are!” John laughed, slapping his hand against the wagon. As if the action reminded him, he stepped back suddenly and gestured at it. “Hey, look, we’ve sorted this out for ya, made it a little more comfortable...”

Ada and Arthur followed him around to the back of it, and she reached out and patted his arm as she grinned at the sight of it. They’d put blankets in the back, along with a few cushions so she could sit up a little, and Ada beamed at them all.

“Oh, look at this! Thank you, all of you, for this, it’s really...” Clearing her throat, she took in a breath, her throat bobbing as she swallowed. “I... I, uhm...”

All their smiles seemed to fade a little as they realised what was coming next, John bowing his head slightly as he scuffed his boot against the ground.

“Well...” She gave a faint, brief smile, her hand sliding into Arthur’s. “... I don’t quite want to leave you all now.”

“We’ll see each other real soon,” John said quietly, meeting her gaze.

“If there’s a weddin’, we wanna be there,” Arthur said, a corner of his mouth lifting.

John chuckled, raising his eyebrows. “Yeah, hell, we’ll see if there even is one.”

“Oh, there will be, she’ll be there waitin’ for you...”

As Sadie and Charles came down the steps, Arthur moved towards John, embracing him tightly.

“She’ll be there,” he repeated, as John patted him on the back.

“I hope so,” he murmured, pulling back with a faint smile.

Tears pricked at Ada’s eyes as Charles approached her, a gentle smile on his lips.

“Charles, I...” She couldn’t finish, and he just nodded, pulling her into his arms. Closing her eyes, tears dripped down her cheeks as she hugged him, holding onto him for support, and just to hold him.

“I’ll see you soon,” he murmured, rubbing her back as she nodded.

Arthur turned from John to Sadie who was leaning against the wagon. Tipping her hat at him, she smiled.

“See you around, Morgan.”

“And you, Mrs Adler,” he smiled widely, nodding.

As Charles and Ada pulled away from one another, sharing a smile, he lifted his head and looked to Arthur. While they embraced, Arthur thanking him quietly once more, Ada blew out a breath with a smile as she met Sadie’s gaze. Tears were still falling down her cheeks and Sadie returned the smile as she stepped closer, shaking her head.

“C’mon, now, I’ll see you at the weddin’.”

“John’s, or yours and Sheriff Daniel’s?”

Tutting, Sadie pulled her in for the tightest hug yet. “Shut up, you.”

Ada laughed thickly, the sound hiding a sob, her chin on her shoulder, eyes closed. “I love you, Sadie Adler.”

Sadie leaned her head against hers, her smile lingering. “I love you, too, lady.”

None of them quite wanted to leave each other.

Ada and Sadie stood with their arms around each other as Arthur, Charles and John attached the wagon to Titan, the permanently calm horse unbothered. When they finally released each other, Sadie took Ada’s hand and squeezed it gently before letting it go. Ada was wiping the tears from her cheeks when John brushed his hands together, stepping back from Titan, and turned to her.

She shouldn’t have bothered wiping the tears away.

They came thick and fast again as he held her, neither saying a word. When he pulled back, he helped her into the wagon, lifting her to sit on the edge as she winced. 

“You look after yourself now,” he said as he released her, and all she could do was nod a few times, sniffing.

Arthur ran a hand through his hair as he came round to the back of the wagon after checking Titan was secured, releasing a breath. Ada reached out to him, sniffing again, and he took her hand, looking at their three friends.

“Well, you all get home safe.”

They nodded, and no one moved.

Arthur looked between them all, keeping a tight hold on Ada’s hand. John was wiping at the corner of his eye swiftly as he cleared his throat, Charles was gazing at them, and Sadie had her hands in her pockets, her eyes on the ground.

“I just wanna...” He knew this wasn’t the last goodbye, but if the past few days, hell, the past few years, had showed anything, it was that if you had something important to say then you said it. “... I just wanna tell you all how much you mean to me, how glad I am to call you my friends, and how thankful I am to you.”

John looked away, his hands on his hips, and Arthur could just imagine what he was thinking.

You bastard...

He could feel himself getting choked up, too, so he just nodded, and looked to Ada as she squeezed his hand. Her cheeks were wet but she was smiling; happy.

“Well...” Arthur said again, looking back to them. “We’d best be on our way.”

“Yeah, sure,” Sadie said in the same moment John nodded silently and Charles murmured, “Farewell.”

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Arthur took both of Ada’s hands, helping to lower her down onto the blankets. She gave a quiet groan as she grimaced, but once she was settled, she shifted back so her legs wouldn’t dangle, and he let go of her hands.

The three of them stayed where they were as Arthur moved to the front and climbed up, taking a seat and gathering the reins. Feeling them in his hands, he paused, both desperate to leave and not wanting to go at all. Turning in his seat, he looked back at them.

A corner of his mouth lifted as he gazed at them, his chest aching. He looked to John last, and it was only when the younger man gave a smile that he nodded his final goodbye, for now, and softly called for Titan to walk on.

The wagon gave a slight lurch as Titan advanced, but then it evened out, Arthur keeping the horse to a walk. Glancing over his shoulder again, he watched John, Charles and Sadie wave back at Ada, his wife’s arm raised high. He had to force himself to look away, whistling so Noka would follow and steering Titan up the street and then, finally, around the corner. 

He heard Ada release a half-sob, half-breath and turned his head to quietly call down to her, “You okay, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, just...”

“I know.”

He felt such a sadness within him, too, but... yes, they would see each other again. As often as they could, he’d make sure of it.

After riding over the train track, there was a short hill to climb just outside of Valentine and a small decline, but then, like he’d told Wallace, it was just straight, flat roads.

They were both quiet as they took the paths home, and he suspected she was sleeping, perhaps just to make time move faster. He was impatient himself but he didn’t dare urge Titan faster than the pace he was now. 

It was a dry day that became warmer the further they travelled, and soon he was having to remove his coat and roll his sleeves up, his hat keeping the sun from his eyes. He stopped once, jumping down to check on her before he gave Titan and Noka some water to drink out of a tin cup from his bag. She was still asleep, and he wasn’t surprised; the real recovery would be starting now.

Arthur nodded at other travellers they passed, though they were few and far between. He was grateful for the quiet, and he managed to not think about all that had transpired, knowing there was time for that later, and that if he started now he wouldn’t be able to stop. Instead, he watched the birds in the sky and the critters that scurried across the path before him until patchy, dusty grass turned to lush green fields. 

As they rolled past the O’Brien’s farm, his heart started to beat a little faster. He took the path around Emerald Ranch, not wanting to be waylaid by any of the farmhands or Nathaniel and Martha. Of course, they’d talk to them later, maybe tomorrow or the day after, but right now there was only one person he wanted to see.

When Newfield’s Rest came into view, he could feel his heart thumping against his ribcage. Driving under the archway, his gaze darted from the paddock to the house.

There was no one to be seen, just the animals grazing quietly.

He pulled the wagon to a halt halfway down the path to the house and stood, dropping the reins onto the seat.

“Hey! Anyone home?”

Jumping down, he brushed his hands against his trousers, looking at the windows and seeing no movement. Licking his lips, he took a step back, and then another, intending to move to the back of the wagon.

And then the door was yanked open and a little, grinning face appeared.

“Papa!”

God have mercy on him, tears instantly stung at his eyes as he laughed, watching Millie Morgan barrel towards him.

“Is that my little angel?!”

He grabbed her once she was close enough, lifting her into his arms and into the tightest hug he could give.

“You’re home!” she cried, her tiny arms wrapping around his neck.

Drawing his head back to gaze at her, he smoothed her unruly hair back from her face with a wide smile. “Hello, darlin’.”

“I missed you and I made a new stick hut for my doll and I wanted to show you it but Chester knocked it over but that’s okay I can make a new one and then I can show you that one.”

He just gazed at her as she rambled on, nodding his head every few moments. “Yeah, yeah, you sure can, angel. I’ll even help you make it—”

“Where’s Ada?”

Raising his head, Arthur found Thomas O’Driscoll stood on the porch, expressionless, eyes darting from him to the wagon. 

Ah, shit, here we go...

Licking his lips again, Arthur turned his body slightly and placed Millie on the ground, even as she made a reluctant sound.

“She’s just—”

“Here.”

Both men looked to the voice, and saw Ada, a hand pressed against the wagon, moving towards them. Her voice had shaken a little and Arthur couldn’t tell if it was from weariness or her tears.

They rolled down her cheeks like a stream as Millie gasped and beamed.

“Mama!”

“Oh, my darling...” It must have pained her considerably, but she dropped to her knees and welcomed her daughter into her arms as the little girl ran towards her, her eyes closing tightly.

“I missed you, Mama!”

Arthur watched her features crumble, her hand stroking her hair. “I missed you, too, darling, I missed you so much.”

“I didn’t eat all your chocolate, I promise!”

“G-Good, that’s very good, thank you.”

She was trying so hard to suppress her sobs, and, after wiping at his eyes, Arthur moved towards them. With an arm around her back and a hand on her arm, he helped her up, hoping the hiss she released would just be interpreted as a strange sob. 

Glancing up at Thom, he knew it hadn’t been.

His brother-in-law stared at him, his stillness a stark contrast to Charlotte who was beaming at his side, her raised hands clasped together.

“Welcome home!” she called warmly, and lifted her skirts slightly to move down the steps towards them.

Arthur looked away from Thom, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach, and met Charlotte’s gaze, smiling at her.

“It’s good to see you,” he murmured as she kissed his cheek, his hands remaining on Ada to keep her up.

“And you! Come on in, I’ll make you both some tea, you must be exhausted.” 

Charlotte was a smart woman so he knew she was ignoring, for now, both the obvious state of Ada and her husband’s reaction. Moving past Thom and entering the house, she didn’t say a word to him, just patted his arm, maybe even squeezed it pointedly, and disappeared inside.

Arthur didn’t bother to see if Thom followed her in, looking away and smiling the moment Millie pulled her head back and beamed at him. He shifted closer to them, allowing Ada the opportunity to lean against him as she kept a tight hold on Millie, and for his other arm to wrap around both of them. Ada’s head rested against his shoulder, gazing at their daughter as she rubbed her back gently.

“Can we have cake?” Millie asked, wonderfully oblivious to all that was happening.

“Of course we can, as much as you want.” Arthur ruffled her hair lightly, making her giggle, and his heart soared.

As Millie rambled on about all the different cakes they had and exactly what order she wanted them in, Arthur turned his head and pressed a lingering kiss to the top of Ada’s head. His fingers stroked against her side, and she released a long, soft breath.

They were home.

——————

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[goodnight-socialiite]

What a Shark Puppy Concert is like (+ setlist of covers)

I have a FUCKTON of headcanons of what a Shark Puppy concert would be like, and i must eject them into the void before i go crazy. I sure hope everyone is still thinking about the clown movie and their shark band. I always imagine them doing something like Ninja Sex Party’s “Under the Covers” albums.

Here’s my playlist of Songs that Shark Puppy totally covered

First and foremost:

Mike: plays the primarily drums and the trumpet (when songs call for it)

Beverly: plays primarily bass, but also lead guitar, rhythm guitar, acoustic guitar, and keyboard, when the other boys sing

Stan: plays primarily keyboard, but also rhythm guitar

Bill: plays primarily lead guitar, bass when Beverly sings.

Eddie: plays keyboard, rhythm guitar, bass, and lead guitar interchangeably, when one band member wants to sing without instruments (a real jack of spades). 

Richie: plays primarily rhythm guitar, but also drums.

Ben: I read a fic where he was their manager, and now i can’t see him as anything else, but he plays the acoustic guitar. 

These kids? multi-faceted. I like to think that they went to a music school, where they learn multiple instruments.. I also think them learning multiple parts for songs would help if one member is sick, or needs a break during the concert.

Since people are trading between instruments, there’s a lot of chatter and crowd interactions, it’s super lit. 

Set List and breakdown under the cut:

1. Killing Me Softly- Roberta Flack 

The concert opens with the boys all standing in a line, like an acapella group, with microphones on stands. Beverly is standing either by the side, or in the middle, with an electric guitar. They sing this beautiful cover of the song, with Beverly accompanying on the guitar; which seems like it wouldn’t work, since the song is so gentle, but it does. the fellas are singing their hearts out about a their man who’s killing them softly, while Beverly is shredding, and the crowd is losing their minds. The boys are doing this crazy five part harmony, and they can barely hear themselves over the fans.

2. No Scrubs - but the Wheezer cover

From “Killing Me Softly”, they immediately transition to No Scrubs. Everyone fucking books it to their instruments, while Richie and Bev go into the first verse. Mike on the drums, Stan on the keyboard, Bill on lead, Bev gets back to the bass, and Eddie on rhythm guitar. Richie really knows how to get the crowd riled up. He jumps around and has so much attitude, and the fans eat it up. Everyone is seriously eating up the gender bending of the songs.

3. Istanbul - They Might Be Giants

Possibly the most chaotic song they perform, Eddie takes over keyboard while Richie picks up rhythm, and Bill’s on lead. they belt out the lyrics, and dance across the stage. Stand and Richie do the answer and call for “Why’d they change it I can’t say,” “PEOPLE JUST LIKE IT BETTER THAT WAY!” it’s just... the drama, and the chaos, ugh, it’s a spiritual experience to see them perform it live. Stan and Richie get each other really hyped, and Stan is stand in between Bill and Richie while they play.

4. I Like (The Idea of) You - Tessa Violet

Beverly takes on the lead vocals, while all the boys do backup. She loves the bass part tho, and demands that she play it while singing. Stan takes back the keyboard, so during the song, Eddie doesn’t have an instrument, so he plays the tambourine, and dances like a 60′s backup singer (something like the Supremes) and it becomes a meme. like people captioning 240p pictures with “When the group leader doesn’t assign you any work” but they love it. the song itself is so fun, the band really plays with it.

5. Pieces of Us - Mark Ronson feat King Princess

Eddie takes center stage, and just fucking destroys this song. He has the range, he has the moves. The fans love it, because they didn’t start #moreeddieplease for nothing. and Eddie definitely doesn’t make the most intense eye contact with Richie through the whole song. When they perform this song more, Reddie likes to rile up everyone, and get particularly... creative. Especially at the line “the way you turn me on,” because Eddie can dance, he can move his hips, and he loves it when Richie’s jaw drops and he forgets to play. The crowd loses their minds.

Intermission: I Love You - Bill Wurtz

While the band takes a short break between songs (water, towels, and the fastest bathroom breaks), it’s just Stan, fucking shit up on the keyboard and singing, while wearing sunglasses. Before he even begins, he dedicates the sog to Patty, and the crowd goes fucking mental. it’s odd, but he makes it work, and the fans go fucking buck wild. It’s the wild card for sure, but the vibes are... off the charts. Stan would survive the vibe check. 

6. Baby I’m Yours - the Arctic Monkey’s cover

Everyone jumps back in, with Richie hangs back and plays the drums while Bill and Mike do this gushy duet with each other. Everyone pretends not to enjoy it, gagging and playing begrudgingly, but the crowd is swaying to the tune, and making heart eyes. Someone took a candid photo of Mike with his arms around Bill’s waist while Bill plays the guitar. Stan gets his designated break during this song, (No keyboard needed) and he is just watching the cheesy, romantic shit happen in the wings with Ben, while sipping a cup of water.

7. Everybody Wants to Rule the World - but the Ninja Sex Party cover

This is the song where they each sing different verses, and the way they sing lines extra loud, oof, it really resonates with the crowd. Sometimes its more screaming than singing, but they need that.

8. The Only Exception - Paramore

Ben joins the band for this song, because he and Beverly sit on chairs at the center of stage, and he plays acoustic while she sings, then the whole band joins in. This kind of display of love gets people a little teary-eyed, waving their phones an lighters in the air.

9. Starry Starry Night - Don McLean 

Sometimes they play one or the other. Bill always introduces the song, and dedicates it to Georgie. Georgie always encouraged Bill to keep drawing and creating art. They had gone to an art gallery together, and seen a print of Van Gogh’s Starry Starry Night. It means so much to Bill. If people weren’t crying during the display of Benverly, they were in fucking tears. The first time Bill performs Starry Starry Night, it’s just him and his acoustic guitar, and later, twitter is filled with support and messages of love. Every time he plays it, number one trending on twitter is #starrystarrynight. The occasional #fuckimcrying was thrown in.

10. Say my Name - but the Hozier cover, and a bit more metal.

Eddie nails this song, and he gets real playful whenever they perform it. He likes to antagonize Richie, always singing the verses to him, as though he were the man in question. Rich plays along, bless his heart, and they get the who crowd to sing along. 

11. Eddie my Love - The Teen Queens

This is Richie’s fucking pride and joy. Whenever he sings it, he tries to sing to Eddie (who’s trying to play Richie’s part on rhythm), while Eds tries not to blush and instead look pissed. The fans are screaming at this. One time, they had tricked Eddie into thinking “Eddie my Love” was removed from the set list, (he was equal parts happy and sad). When they started playing it, Richie got a chair, and sat Eddie in it, and was on his knees, singing so dramatically. Eddie covers his face, so people think he’s embarrassed, when actually, he’s so flushed with affection. The crowd is wild, and Eddie can’t help but peck Richie’s cheek as a reward. 

12. What the World Needs Now is Love - Jackie DeShannon

Mike opens on trumpet, and no one has ever seen a crowd get so hype with just a trumpet, but people begin to s c r e a m. There’s one point, where the band stops singing and playing, and the crowd is singing to them “What the world needs now, is love! Sweet love!” and it reminds them that maybe the kids are alright.

[bunny-hoodlum]

Don't Leave Her(e)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20434955/chapters/48480602

Sasuke follows an Otsutsuki into a world very much like our own.

It lead him farther than he’s ever gone.

A new dimension opened up to him.

He would like to get used to this by now, but no. His Space-Time dojutsu still left him winded.

He stepped out of the side of a building into a narrow alley, the abyssal portal closing behind him.

An assortment of unknown sounds bombarded his senses, so loud they seemed in competition.

Chugging, whirring, whooshing. Blaring horns not unlike the those on the freight ships back home. There were beeps that stuttered and others that dragged on.

Amongst the din was a constant shuffling like a herd in the distance. There too played music with instruments he’d never heard before.

It was rather… chirpy.

A noisy creak alerted him. A door a few feet to Sasuke’s left opened outwards and a man in a white apron and white hat stepped out, trash bag in hand.

But…

Sasuke hadn’t sensed him.

The man took no notice of Sasuke as he headed for the dumpster. Soon as he tossed the bag in and headed for the door, he halted to a stop.

The cook scrutinized him for a good minute.

“Ain’t never seen anyone wear a cape so casually, ‘cept the cosplayers on the bridge. You lost?”

Sasuke shook his head. “Just passing through.”

The cook craned his head back, looking down his nose. “Uh-huh. From where?”

Sasuke looked to his right, taking note that the alley lead to a brick wall. The building ahead appeared to be five storeys tall, its fire escape evidently unused.

Having no answer, Sasuke strode for the exit.

“Wait. Wait now, hold-” The cook grasped at Sasuke’s left arm, only to come up empty. “-up?” His grip slackened enough for Sasuke to slip through.

Leaving the alleyway had been like emerging from a tunnel of ignorance.

The world opened up to him, blinding at first, then overwhelming with the sheer activity of life all around him.

Thousands of people filled these streets. Phones to their heads and bags in their arms. Vehicles he’d never dreamed before sped along what seemed like a concrete river. Monitors which hung off of the faces of sky-reaching buildings flashed obnoxiously with gleaming faces and polished products.

A monstrous scream accompanied by an enormous shadow swept overhead, spiking his heart rate.

A giant bird?

No. It had a long, conical body with a tail like a shark and blades for wings. It was evidently metal, shining white as it hummed fiercely towards its descent.

An old anecdote from Naruto’s teen years came to mind, the only one where he rode upon a giant flying island turtle. But he doubted Naruto could help him understand this UFO any better, even if he was here.

Upon closer inspection, Sasuke noticed something: It had a bright red emblem on its tail.

A red leaf.

_____

The trail was gone.

Sasuke cursed his luck.

Perhaps they had merely passed through this realm.

But now Sasuke was stranded until his chakra replenished enough for another crossing. At this point, he was more inclined to return home than follow a cold trail.

Sasuke tugged at the collar of his cape, sweat slicking down his skin. The gesture brought more attention to himself, based on the passive stares he was receiving.

Just like back in his world, it was the height of summer.

He was missing the summer solstice festival. He couldn’t promise to go with them. Didn’t mean he wouldn’t like to.

Sakura said she’d send him pictures. She already showed him the yukata Sarada would be wearing. He wouldn’t be able to see the pictures until he got back, though.

The season was the same, but somehow it was much more stifling than he was used to.

Actually, it was a lot more of many things he was used to.

For starters, the roads back in his world are never this crowded. He feels like a minnow swimming against a current of impatient salmon, ready to be tossed out.

How is it that there are this many people existing in a single mile radius, and yet they have no perceivable life force?

He just couldn’t get his head around it.

_____

Sasuke needs to get his bearings.

He needs to prevent the Otsutsuki from feeding off any more God Trees.

What if there was one here?

It was worth to check.

Finding relief away from the crowds, Sasuke stepped into a wide side street. Square stone seats and benches lined the center, offset by a series of shrubs encased in stone boxes.

Shops lined either side, and overhead were diamond-shaped awnings that spanned the entire arcade.

As Sasuke strode past an eatery of sorts, cool mist struck his eyes and mouth.

He jumped back slightly, ignoring the looks from the customers seated in the patio dining area. From the awning of the restaurant was a system of black devices attached by a black wire. From the mouth of these devices spewed a constant production of mist that shrouded much of the patio from the summer heat.

Sasuke reminded himself to move on. And to stop getting surprised by the little things.

He was only bound to run into more.

____

This was the first time he’s seen Sarada since she was born.

She was two now.

Sakura held their toddler, her expression warm and a little exasperated as Sarada grabbed onto his forefinger.

Quite the grip.

Sarada began nomming on his finger.

Oh. That’s what she wanted it for.

“She’s been teething,” Sakura said. “I’ve tried frozen mochi, a homemade anesthetic gel, my parents stopped by with a kokeshi, all with limited success…”

Sasuke smiled at his adorable daughter. The hard bumps of her budding front teeth not unlike a dog’s play-bites, and he felt strangely proud of her. Proud of her health, her growth.

“I’m sorry to leave you with everything, Sakura.”

Deep down, he’d love to trade places with his wife, to experience the same joys and stresses as her.

She waved him off. “We’ve already discussed this. You’re fighting for peace of mind. Someday Sarada-chan will understand.”

Sasuke’s jaw shifted.

Because on his worst days, he hardly understood himself at all.

_____

It’s when Sasuke finally takes a moment to purchase food at a nearby grill stand that he realizes his currency is unrecognizable.

Figures.

He’s concerned he’ll have to make multiple trips back to this world. In which case, he better make the most of his time gathering intelligence.

His phone doesn’t work.

Of course. Why would it?

He has access to Konoha’s main databank; what Shiho and her ever expanding department of coders call 'the Intranet’. But here, nothing.

He thinks his technology may not be up to date, let alone remotely compatible. Another thing to look into, for sure.

Sasuke folds the phone closed and rests his mouth against the flat of his fingers.

His hard stare into the distance gains focus as he registers something. There on the television screen appears to be a familiar face.

But that had to be a mistake.

Sasuke got up from the stone bench and approached the store window displaying various TVs.

One had a drama, not unlike the new form of scripted entertainment cropping up in his world. Another showed a man at a desk and two other men were seated off to the side. There was a martial arts tourney held in an octogonal ring there, horses racing along a dirt oblong on this screen, and six people in brightly colored jumpsuits struggling up a flight of white stairs over on this screen. Why they kept falling down and getting back up, he didn’t understand.

But he imagined Naruto wanting to give it a try.

Ignoring these distractions, the one thing that really pulled at his gaze was the news coverage.

PM Sarutobi Extends Visit to Kumo no Kuni

That was him.

That was really him.

Liver spots and all.

Sarutobi Hiruzen.

He looked so different out of the robes and hat. The dark gray suit was tailored to fit, emphasizing his diminutive stature. He wasn’t that old yet, but he was getting there, and he would likely only continue to shrink.

Just when Sasuke’s imperfect reasoning had begun to toy with the possibility of reincarnation, Hiruzen was shown seated at a conference desk beside none other than A himself.

And the old hard-ass still had both arms.

Sasuke rubbed at forehead, shutting his eyes as he tried to process everything.

His forehead rubbing soon upgraded to firmly knocking against his skull.

No. He didn’t understand it all.

_____

He pressed his mouth to his wife’s small, round shoulder, earning a low, drawn-out moan.

A sharp wail disrupted this evening of stolen kisses and Sakura pulled away, suppressing her groan.

“Let me soothe her. It may be nightmares again.” She said, getting up.

Again, huh? Sasuke wondered what a three year old had to be afraid of.

His hand was on her shoulder in no time. He dipped in for a quick peck. “Get yourself ready for me. I’ll be back in a minute.”

His wife’s blush stirred the want more as she nodded obediently and reclined into bed.

Slipping out into the hallway, he made it to Sarada’s room.

She was standing and clutching at the rails of her crib. Her hiccups were frequent, almost violent and her sobs frantic.

She spotted him in the doorway, and it was like an instant switch. “Papa.” She chirped matter-of-factly.

He always wondered if it had been Sakura’s idea to teach her 'papa’ over anything else.

His father had always been 'Chichi-ue’ to him.

But Sasuke had demurred from taking the mantle of clan head. He had far too much to do. He had been the final Uchiha, the last true heir and he ran their name into the ground with his so-called 'wilding’ as Kakashi-sensei liked to tease. He needed to clean the slate. He needed to earn back his place.

Sasuke lifted Sarada up, inspecting her face for any trace of fear or sadness.

“Papa.” She reached for him, arms waving. She was perfectly fine now. He did say he would only need a minute.

As soon as Sasuke put her down, the pained screams started again. And in a panic, he scooped her up again.

Her big black eyes stared at him expectantly.

What was he supposed to do during this part?

_____

There was a curious amount of disquiet in a world so peaceful that Sasuke had to wonder what prevented it from falling apart at all.

Jashinist Slain after Tokonoha Commissioner General Indicates Group’s hand in The Nines Incident

“… There’s a lot of misconceptions going around about what we worship and the nature of our rituals. But it’s all purely symbolic. We invite people to see for their own eyes that we are not dangerous…”

Sasuke heavily doubted there were any misconceptions.

Former PM Senju Hashirama’s Legacy Brought Into Question

Sasuke wasn’t ready to go down that rabbit hole again.

Uzushio-Hi no Kuni Relations Worsen as the Fifth Anniversary of the Nines Incident Draws Near

“… They refuse to release the full list of the victims names. My daughter was nine months pregnant at the time. I just want to take her home. I just want to bury my daughter…”

Sasuke had the vaguest dread as to what this 'Nines Incident’ meant in this world.

But if there was no monster here like Kurama, then to what scale had been this destruction?

Momochi Zabuza Evades Arrest for Botched Attempt Against LDP’s Oppositional Leader

Apparently some things never change.

Whatever the current climate of unrest seemed to be, he sense no threat of war.

Perhaps this world was too big to suffer as a whole.

Some people may get scratched off, but that’s all it is: A scratch.

Had the massacre never happened and his grandparents passed away of old age, he likely wouldn’t have been able to muster a misty eye. He barely knew them enough at the time to be fond of them.

Sasuke’s world is vast, but the lines between territory and loyalties are clear.

A single domino can topple an entire nation.

Was a single domino enough for this world to fall too?

_____

Night had fallen and the streets had emptied.

The alleys and roadsides took up bedraggled, bearded men resting on their cardboard beds.

But then Sasuke came upon a man in a nice suit, face down in the street. He wasn’t injured, Sasuke soon found. Just black-out drunk.

Sasuke shifted him upright and leaned him against a nearby wooden bench. Sasuke paused to observe his breathing.

It was going to take some getting used to, not being able to sense life in the way that was so innate to him.

A place like this would be absolute hell for Karin.

Sasuke had noticed the CCTVs for some time.

It was better he didn’t perform any strange acrobatics for the time being.

_____

Sasuke toyed with the idea of creating an assumed identity.

He didn’t know how long it would take him to be sure this world wasn’t cultivating a God Tree. He wouldn’t be able to stay anonymous for long.

He would need to adapt to this world’s level of technology, as well. Seeing the wires pulled away from the sides of buildings, suspended instead upon metal spires that looked tadpole tails, he knew there was a difference in the logic of their engineering. If it wasn’t simply ahead of theirs, it was surely done out of necessity and perhaps tradition.

Back home, the wires were visible, running alongside buildings, homes and roofs like arteries.

Shinobi, who often travelled above the ground, had no fear of snagging their ankles or neck. The design, therefore, was their tradition, their necessity.

One final thing he became aware of the sheer amount of individual businesses packed in a single mile radius. Cafes, clothing stores, electronics, furniture, groceries, these things seemed to have fused at the hip, forcing new businesses to build atop them like bricks.

Perhaps commerce was the blood of society in this world.

Perhaps this was what the so-called End of History was to look like.

When all wars are settled, there is nothing else to do but play with money.

_____

An unassuming stone staircase caught his attention, for it lead three flights down into a darkened, verdant park.

The walking path wove like a snake between the trees.

Black metal trash cans stood along the trail here and there. Green dispensers carried rolls of black bags. They sported a sign, showing a stick figure stooping over behind a dog.

Huh. He wondered what that Inuzuka boy would think of this.

Sasuke took a seat on a lone wooden bench. He craned his head back to rest.

But when he closed his eyes, he became unsettled.

Even if he relied on his ears, or that subconscious instinct that told him when he was being watched (an ability he decided that had to be vestigial from being an indirect descendant of Kaguya), his senses still sought out the flickering warmth of chakra.

Closing his eyes felt like he was sinking into a place he could never wake up from.

_____

Something scurried in the distance. Through the bushes. Too big to be a squirrel or stray mutt.

Sasuke lurched upright and there peeking out from behind a tree was a little girl.

She had straight, dark hair in a cropped princess cut style. Her skin was white, her eyes blue, and she couldn’t be older than four or five.

Unsure what to do, Sasuke waved at her.

And she waved back.

Sasuke reached into his vest pocket, digging out four pieces of hard candy in paper wrappers.

Sarada snuck them in when he wasn’t looking.

Black tea flavor. Sakura said they were her favorite.

Sasuke leaned forward, elbow propped on his knee and he held the candy out towards.

In the back of his mind, this gesture felt a little shady to him. If some strange man happened to offer his daughter her favorite candy, he would be inclined to reveal the hilt of his sword.

The little girl stepped out from behind the tree.

She took one little step. Hesitated. Then another little step. She repeated this pattern, when halfway her eyes brightened and she ran up to him.

She reached for the candy, her hand hovering short of grabbing one while her big eyes implored him for his approval.

“They’re for you, from my daughter. She told me sweets should be shared amongst friends.” A total fabrication, but how else was she going to trust him?

The little girl plucked a single candy from his palm and fished it out of its paper wrapper, then popped it in her mouth.

She then grabbed another one and held it out towards him.

Oh yeah. He did say sweets should be shared amongst friends.

Pocketing the other two pieces, he accepted the candy from her. He gazed at it reluctantly. He’s had these in his pocket for over a week. A gift from Sarada, perhaps even a bribe in her mind to get him to stay. For him, they were precious keepsakes.

Well, it wasn’t like he was never going to see her again.

Sasuke worked the candy from its wrapper with his thumb, popped it into his mouth and let the flavor meld onto his saliva. It was pleasant and smooth, not too sweet at all. An unassuming treat.

The little girl’s face began to scrunch and droop, as if she were working on a cough drop instead.

“Don’t like it?”

She shrugged. Through a mouthful of darkened saliva, she said. “Not sweet enough.”

“Hn. What’s your name?” Sasuke began to cautiously eye the toddler. Her lavender pants were soaked with muddied water from the knees down. Her white shoes were caked in mud as well. Her elbows were scuffed, giving him the impression that she must have fallen. Her skin and her hair were otherwise clean, showing that she was not like those downtrodden men from earlier.

It must be that she was only gone recently enough that her family wasn’t looking for her yet. But that would change soon if he didn’t act.

She looked at him funny for asking. “Hinata.”

In this world full of coincidences, time seemed to slow to a halt.

And in the brief seconds when her eyes would close, a round, timid face from his childhood replaced hers with perfect sameness.

“How old are you?”

She thrusted four fingers towards him.

He hoped this wasn’t somehow her.

“Is your birthday soon?”

She shook her head. “Too hot. Us'lly snow comes out to celebrate with me.”

No. This was just a coincidence. She couldn’t possibly be who he thought she was.

She scooted towards him, hands clutching the edges of his cape. He stiffened, hoping she wouldn’t see the scabbard angled against his back.

“Aniki, you taking me back to daddy now?”

Sasuke clasped his hand over hers and nodded.

_____

Sasuke stood in the hallway, holding Sarada against him as Sakura slipped her shoes on in the genkan.

“I’m not going to be gone long, but you sure you’re going to be okay with her?”

“She’s sleeping.” What was there to worry about?

Sakura brushed her bangs aside, looking torn between leaving him or staying.

They were short on groceries. Sakura’s director duties at the children’s clinic had cut into the little free time she had, and his appearance today had been spontaneous to say the least.

“Okay.” She finally said. “I’m leaving now.”

“Take care.”

This was all he could do really.

Sakura knew what they needed, what they usually stocked up on when he wasn’t around. She most likely felt compelled to pick up extra things now that he was here. And with his self-imposed penance, he wasn’t going to be much help carrying all of that back from the marketplace had he gone instead.

This was all that he could do.

_____

Hinata’s resting against him just like Sarada was that day. She seems to have taken to him quite easily.

It’s calming, going for a walk like this. He thinks of doing with this Sarada some day, before she got too big of course, with Sakura’s hand curled around his bicep.

Their village was beautiful, and there’s so much to try and explore. He keeps hearing about it. It’s Naruto’s pride and joy to share how it was evolving, expanding. Rokudaime must be proud, too. He tries to say he’s just a holdover Hokage until Naruto is ready, but no one was going to let Kakashi talk himself down like that.

Every day something new sprouted up to the point that an official newsletter had begun to circulate through the village. Naruto told him the first time he, Hinata and Boruto had waited in the longest line ever for the new bakery that had debuted right across Dango-ya.

Sasuke understood right away: Competition is good for growth.

The city lights greeted them as he drew closer to the shops he had ventured passed during his first hours. Their windows were darkened however, and he believed it was well past business hours.

But in a place this developed, he was banking on one thing: Finding a convenience store.

Konoha was beginning to have shops like these.

Naruto wrote him once, (back at a time when neither of them were quite accustomed to their phones just yet), and he had gone on and on about the selection of instant ramen he had discovered on their shelves.

He sounded just like his twelve-year-old self. As excitable and single-minded as ever.

Hinata started to squirm against his shoulder. She was getting antsy.

“You hungry?” He asked.

“Mmhm.”

She hadn’t been able to tell him much about her home or where it was, but taking her sullied state into account, he felt he could narrow it down. This place was like a paved island. His search would have to begin outside of its limits.

“How come you weren’t scared of me?”

She shrugs. “I have a lotta big brothers. You look like them.”

Interesting. Sasuke tried to picture Hiashi with a whole brood of boys. In that picture, Neji stormed in, fending off anyone who would dare replace him as her most beloved brother.

Sasuke had heard from Naruto how the reformed branch member had become so fiercely protective of his younger cousin. To think the key to Neji’s freedom from hate had been one withheld letter penned to him by his father. Why it had been revealed so late, Sasuke failed to understand. But for all the pain Sasuke had caused, he kind of envied Neji for being able to make it back home so easily.

“So what do you mean I look like them?”

Bright white lights beamed out of a squat building, their white and blue sign shining just as brightly.

“They wear dark clothes, their hair is dark, the faces they make are dark.”

“They scowl at you?”

They crossed the parking out and entered inside. A synthetic bell tone welcomed them.

“Not at me. I seen them look mean at someone else’s brothers.”

“Hn.”

They began to peruse the shelves. Sasuke considered finding something that Sarada would enjoy.

Royal Milk Tea Biscuits? Matcha Chews?

Hinata pointed at a row of packaged cinnamon rolls, and Sasuke frowned.

He picked it up in a hurry and the moment the cashier stepped outside the back door, Sasuke slipped out the front.

Just a pile of coincidences, he reminded himself.

_____

There was a booth up ahead, lonely and a little out of place.

A man in uniform idled inside on a chair, his legs pointed out towards the street. His clothes were shades of blue, dark pants and dark vest, pale dress shirt and a dark, brimmed hat with a golden emblem on the center.

Hinata stirred and pointed towards the man. “He knows my daddy!”

Sasuke slowed, wary of catching the man’s suspicion. “Does he?”

Hinata nodded vigorously. “They’re in my house all the time.”

What the hell does that mean?

The closer Sasuke neared, the more his gut told him what kind of person this was: Law Enforcement.

“Aniki, he can help us.”

“Yeah, I know…”

It would be the quickest, most sane thing to do. But it wasn’t in the cards right now.

They’d want ID, a home address…

“Sorry Hinata-chan, but we can’t trust him.”

She peered up at him for a beat before settling back down. “Okay. My daddy says that, too.”

Sasuke kept his head down, forcing himself to make it past detection.

Naruto had come to him one day on behalf of Rokudaime. They wanted to reinvigorate the police force, build it up to its former glory. Sandaime had long relied on ANBU to keep the order, and Godaime after him, but that was no longer viable.

Because the police force was no longer being placed upon a single clan, they were working on the interviewing process, as well as reviewing the previous standard of regulations. A copy of the citizen registry, alongside an old compilation of past arrest records found in his father’s preserved study had given him significant insight for updating those regulations.

The last thing Sasuke needed was to get detained. Kamui wasn’t even an option, not unless the situation were truly dire.

“Where’s your daughter?” Hinata asked out of the blue.

“She’s at home.”

“And what are you doing here?”

“I’m working.”

“Oh.”

_____

In his attempts to have more presence in Sarada’s life, this too has been occurring just as frequently.

The first time he heads for the genkan, his sandals are missing.

He finds them in the storage room.

The next time they’re missing, Sakura screeches.

They’re in the toilet.

The next time they’re in the trash, soaked in melon juice and forcibly hidden beneath discarded egg shells, bok choy stalks, and styrofoam meat trays.

Sakura gets mad.

He doesn’t.

Sarada stops hiding his shoes.

So when he slips them on, a tiny crawling sensation lances up his spine. He stares down at the mess. He’s just pushed pudding everywhere, and it’s oozing between his bare toes.

When Sakura holds up Sarada towards him with an expectant glare, he pokes his wife’s forehead then Sarada’s, and takes his leave.

He didn’t know that was the wrong thing to do until the most recent incident.

His shoes are missing again.

They find Sarada in the backyard. She’s shoving large rocks down the high-tops of his right sandal. She’s thought this through. They’re too large to slide out of the cutouts on their own.

“SARADA!” Sakura scolds, marching towards their daughter.

Sarada whirls around on them in a panic. She grabs the left sandal, which has not been stuffed with rocks, and chucks it across the backyard with a bitter shout.

Sasuke grasps his wife’s wrist before she reaches their daughter, and it was the wrong thing to do.

“Are you going to do something this time?!” She wrenches her wrist free. His lack of response, his obvious lack of awareness earns his wife’s full ire. “Stop trying to be her friend. You are her father.”

“She’s little.”

“She’s being a brat. And you know why this keeps happening?!” Sakura grips his hand and hard. “Every time you’re here, you undermine me. She thinks its okay because you act the same no matter what she does. Is that fair? Is it fair that I have to be the bad guy all the time?”

His chest constricts. Any rebuttals he had were void as soon as he felt them on his tongue.

It startled him, the feeling that layers of happy illusions were peeling down all around him.

Sakura’s changed. Motherhood’s changed her. Of course it would. Of course she would know these things that he doesn’t know anything about. Of course.

But they became a mother and father at the same time. He thought… He thought that was it. Like he’d just been moved into a new squad with a higher promotion.

“I’m sorry-”

“Sasuke, I know. You’re always sorry. I know.”

Yeah. He was sorry his wife was still married to a teenager. He was sorry that he’s been disrupting the space she’s created for their daughter to grow in. Sorry he has nothing to contribute.

“Sasuke.” She urged. But she wasn’t giving up on him. She was trying to put him on the right path.

But he was still scared.

He didn’t want to be the bad guy, either.

“What should I do?”

Her grip softened. “Just be firm with her. She knows better than to disrespect someone else’ property.”

“Does she?”

“Yes. She plays with Choji’s girl. I’ve talked with you about this.”

“Yeah.” He doesn’t remember this at all.

'Firm’ she says. Right, his mother had been firm with him before. His father, instead, withheld praised Sasuke knew he deserved. They loved him, he knows. He isn’t mad. But when he recalls how he felt back then, he had doubts towards them. He felt like he wasn’t good enough for his father, that he was a needy nuisance towards his brother, that mom didn’t need to rely on him nearly as much as she did on Itachi’s successes.

In a single instance, he could cause his daughter as much pain as those moments had for him.

And he would carry that knowledge with him forever.

Sasuke stepped off the engawa and approached his little girl. He crouched down before her, holding her gaze like he was staring down ten thousand poison-tipped senbon.

“Sarada-chan, no matter what you do, you can’t stop me from leaving.” Straight facts. A three-foot tall four year couldn’t stop a shinobi of his caliber.

But that wasn’t what Sarada wanted to hear.

And that’s not how she heard it at all.

Her eyes widened, trembling. They were glassy with tears.

He moved forward to course correct, to hug her, to love her, but she stomped off for the discarded sandal.

Picking it up, she gives a running start and throws it even farther away, right into Sakura’s rose bushes.

Sarada ran off.

“SARADA! Sasuke, hold on, I’ll get her! Sarada!” Sakura sprinted off their property. It didn’t take long for her to scoop up their screaming toddler.

He watched his wife in a daze as she scolded Sarada so expertly, and in that moment he thinks that his and Naruto’s childhood roles have truly reversed.

No longer was Sasuke a natural at whatever he set out to do.

He was the useless one.

_____

“Are we going to walk there?”

Sasuke’s brows furrowed. “Is it too far?” Walking is the only way I get around. He wasn’t sure how Kamui would work on a powerless human, either.

“Yuh-huh. I was home with mommy. Then I was on a plane with mommy. Now I’m here… without mommy.”

Sasuke was about to ask what was a plane, until the last part.

“I thought we were looking for your dad.”

“Yes. Look only for dad.”

“But what about your mom? You were with her last, you shouldn’t run away.” He recalled the last time he saw Sarada bolting out the backyard. He wondered if he was causing not just resentment towards him, but towards Sakura as well. She didn’t deserve what was happening to her. He really hoped Sarada would understand some day.

A little fist came down on his shoulder and she began to kick. “She did it first! I want my daddy!” She flopped face-first against his shoulder, her frustration palpable.

“Okay, okay.” Sasuke awkwardly bounced her in his arm, something he happened to recall Sakura doing back when Sarada was much smaller.

“You don’t know where we are.” Hinata said.

“No.”

“I don’t know where we are.” She said.

“It’s okay. We’ll figure this out.”

“Nobody knows where we are.”

Sasuke bit down his tongue.

If he wasn’t careful, that part may not be true for very long.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #269

“why aren’t you scared of me, why do you care for me, when we all fall asleep, where do we go?”

What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual. What are you obsessed with right now? lol y'all know my staple stuff I'm always obsessed with, so two recent ones are Skillet (I've been binging soooo hard) and drawing again! What piercings do you want? A lot, jfc. More than any, I want collarbone dermals once I lose enough weight to where they're prominent. I've been on a goddamn weight loss plateau for two years. What’s your favorite show to binge? None. I generally don't enjoy binging too much. Do you watch porn? No, not interested. Do you have a secret sideblog? lol this survey blog. Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced? No. I very briefly considered getting one pierced, but I won't. Are you angry with anyone right now? Not like... actively. But passively it's there. What tattoos do you want? I refuse to die until I'm P A I N T E D  F O R  T H E  G O D S. Do you like paper books or ebooks better? Absolutely paperback books. It feels more "real," something to dive into, and it's easier to see and understand how far you're in. We talked about this in Writing once, was an interesting convo. Plus the smell of books, aaaaaahhhhh. Do you still have feelings for any of your exes? Yes How many followers do you have? On here? *checks* 265. Do you read erotica? No, I'd feel SUPER uncomfortable. That's why 50 Shades has never appealed to me. Have you ever gotten into an accident with you parents’ car? No. Ever thought of just picking up and moving far away? Oh yes. What’s the wallpaper on your computer? My lock screen is the Halo of the Sun from SH, and my actual desktop wallpaper is my favorite closeup of my late pup Teddy. What is the last thing/person you took a picture of? Probably a stupid Facebook meme to show Sara or something lmao. Name a band/artist you like that isn’t that popular. Otep. Can you lift your significant other (your best friend if you’re single)? I'm sure I could. What is the first vehicle you recall your parents/guardians owning? Mom had a blue/greenish van for most of my childhood, while Dad had this old tan thing that he nicknamed "Frida the Cheetah" lmao. He had that damn car forever. Have you ever seen counterfeit money? Not knowingly. Have you ever lost a pet you were attached to? Well of course. I grew up with tons of pets. What was the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done? Probably texting back "fuck you" to Mom when she was being really shitty when I was having a breakdown. Pick one: laundry, dishes, or vacuuming? I'd pick vacuuming over the others any day. Have you ever moved and had to change schools growing up? No. You are forced to move out-of-state. Where do you go? I literally want to move to Canada. The highway and back roads take you to the same place; choose your route. Back roads, probably. You’re going to be a mom/dad; what do you think/do? Have a fucking panic attack. Are you more likely to give up or persist when you’re having trouble? It really depends on the seriousness of the situation, but in most cases I've actually faced, give up. Do you resemble one parent more than the other? I don't think so. Your best friend needs a kidney to survive; do you give them one of yours? If we're compatible, yes. Name a big life event that has taken place for you within the last 2 years. Nothing because my life is incredibly monotonous and stagnant. Name one difficult lesson you’ve learned. Life isn't fair, and life doesn't care. Name one thing you look forward to as you get older. Hey, let's hope I can be a functioning adult before I'm 70. Do you use your hands when you talk to emphasize what you are saying? Yes. Will you usually admit it when you’ve made a mistake? Yeah. Does stress ever affect you physically? If yes, how? Oh, yes. My stomach will absolutely hurt and I sweat more than normal (I say "normal" because I have hyperhidrosis). Did you have a money box as a kid? What shape was it if you did? I don't remember... I know we didn't regularly get an allowance or anything like that, but maybe I'm sure I stored money I was given somewhere? Has kids TV ever frightened you? As a kid, I both watched and feared Courage the Cowardly Dog, lol. Do you have any potted plants in your house? No. If you were born outside of your era, when would you want to be born and why? Early '80s! What a time for music, metal fashion, and fun. If you ran a store, what would you sell/have? IF I was more knowledgeable on more species, probably reptiles and more proper care materials and give advice that's not shit. Places like PetSmart and Petco just... disgust me. What part in a movie would you love to play? If I was confident in acting, probably the maniac lmao. I've experienced enough Crazy for that. What's the oldest article of clothing you own? I don't really know, but I do know Mom has a lot of my and my siblings' shirts as we've grown up to knit together a blanket one day. Fuckin cute as hell. What piece of furniture have you replaced the most? The couch. What instrument do you wish you could be more than great at? Guitar, with that electric twist anyway. What’s the best part of your favorite movie? When Simba roars atop Pride Rock in the storm and all the lionesses join in FUCK I get goosebumps out the WAZOO. What do you think is the most over-rated candy ever? Twizzlers, disgoosting. If you could only debate two topics the rest of your life, what would they be? LGBTQ+ rights is #1, then... hm... probably the pro-choice argument. Or just women rights in general. Out of your friends, who would you say you are most jealous of, artistically? Oh man, my friend Mini. She drew pretty well when we were young, but her skill like... increased exponentially with time. She doesn't draw in a *style* I'm envious of, but that growth tho. Most jealous of….intellectually? Girt. What is broken that you have, that you wish was fixed? My brain lmao. A famous person you have met? Nobody. Who were the last five people to text you? Dad, Sara, Ashley, Mom, and my grandma. What is your favorite book that you had to read for school? The Outsiders. Think of the last two people you kissed. Who was more fun? I've explained the "idk if *I* ever actually kissed Girt" before, but just for the sake of the question, I'll just count him. I tbh hated it only ever because why were your lips always wet, sir???? The latest person was Sara, and she kissed fine. If your house was burning down and you only had sixty seconds to grab one or two things, what would you grab and why? Roman and Venus because they're family and I adore them. Out of all the concerts you have been to, which band/singer was the best performer? Alice was great! When was the last time you went miniature golfing? For Jason's and my second or third anniversary, so a long time ago. What’s a song you like from a genre you hate? I always answer this question with a country answer, so let's go rap. Hm. OH, probably a Post Malone song. I actually don't mind him. If you had twin girls what would you name them? Alessandra indisputably, and then the other... maybe like, Josephine. Especially as twins, I'd want two gorgeous, less-heard names. What kind of condoms do you use? I don't use any because I'm not sexually active. Do you say years young or years old [ex: 16 years young or 16 years old]? Man, I miss the days I could confidently say "years young," lmao. Do you have any personality disorders? Avoidant, yes. I'm pretty convinced I have dependent PD, too. Do you shave your arms? Armpits, yes, but not my entire arms. What do you dip your fries in? Ketchup or honey mustard. Has one of your good friends ever moved away? Damn, yeah. I particularly remember this girl from elementary school in I think the 5th grade that I was very close with, yet I don't remember her name now. What color car are you when you play The Game of Life? Dude idr the colors at all. Which hair color do you find the ugliest? I've seen it be pulled off, but generally, yellow. Would you date a guy that wears more make-up than you do? Hell yeah man you fuckin strut that shit. Did you ever play M.A.S.H. when you were little? Ah, I remember that! Sure did. If you were getting married, who would be your maid of honor? My mom. If you have any pets, were they adopted from the humane society? No, but I would of course. Do you like home design, like picking out paint colors and furniture? Not any more than the average person. Do you chew gum on a regular basis? No. List all of your features that you have ever got compliments on: Do you mean just physical? If that's the case, hair, eyes, smile, uh... I feel like that's it. WAIT I can't remember who but someone once called my nose cute. Have you ever been in a hot air balloon, and if not, would you ever want to go in one? No; yes. What type of computer do you have? It's an Acer Nitro 5. Is anyone else in the room with you right now? My snake. Do you whiten your teeth with crest white strips? Not Crest, but a different brand, yes. I hate my teeth. Do you listen to local bands? Not really. I will sometimes listen to an old friend's band, at least bits of what they post on Facebook. Nova Mortis, check 'em out if you like pretty heavy metal. Do you have a pool in your back yard? No, but damn do I wish. Do your parents fight? Do they even talk at all? That's why they're divorced. They, especially Mom, avoid doing so whenever they can. Do you drink alcohol on New Year’s Eve? Usually. Do you wear rings? Just one, a friendship ring w/ Sara. Are there any restaurants in walking distance to your house? It'd be quite a long walk, at least by my standards. What was the last picture you uploaded to your Facebook? A picture of Mom and me. Have you ever listened to the same song on repeat for hours on end? YES. When I find a song I really like, I become VERY obsessive. Like I will play it and play it and play it for days. I in general have an extremely obsessive personality. Do you like staying in hotels? I don't have much of an opinion. It's a nice change of space, though. Are musicals interesting or boring? They're cheesy to me. What is your favorite scent of incense? (If you burn it) Okay, HEAR ME OUT. There is legit a kind called "monkey farts" that smells SO FUCKIN GOOD. Jason used to burn incense in his room all the time and that was my favorite one, so I use it now. Where do you normally hang out on the weekends? At home. I'm always at home, regardless of the day. Can you tune a guitar by ear or do you need a tuner? I never could. Do you like love songs? Generally, yes. They're sweet. Would you rather drink 7Up or Sprite? Fun fact: Sprite used to be my FAVORITE soda as a kid. I even had a fuckin Sprite shirt. Now, I hate it. I haven't tasted 7UP in forever. What is your favorite song as of right now? I'm seriously digging Halocene lately, esp their cover of "bury a friend." Have you ever sex texted? This is gonna sound so stupid, but I'm actually not *totally* sure what that is? Just like, dirty talking or like, virtually RPing sex? The former I did when I was fuckin 12 like a goddamn idiot, but not the latter. When's the last time you went out of state? A year and a half (I think?) ago to visit Sara. What was your favorite TV show last year? I didn't *really* have one, at least not actively. Like I didn't devoutly watch anything. Would you know who to talk to if you wanted weed? HAHA I sureeeee do. I wouldn't want any, though. What is your favorite Beatles song? "Hey, Jude." If you could kiss anyone right now, who would it be? I don't want to think about this. What is your favorite energy drink? I don't like energy drinks. Way too intense. Have you ever been to Hooters before? No. When's the last time you tripped? (Literally or, you know) HA, funny I take this survey today because my left foot is either broken or I seriously tore a ligament in it because I fell yesterday. I had to go up a dose on my medication that helps my nightmares, but it's notoriously for lowering your blood pressure, and mine is naturally low. I got up to go to the bathroom and grab breakfast and many times nearly passed out from being so dizzy until I finally fell and my foot bent forward. I couldn't even walk by myself yesterday and am still really struggling today. Our family friend brought the boot she wore when she broke her foot over just a while ago, but if this doesn't help, Mom's demanding I go to the ER. Can you touch your toes? I don't know HOW I can, but I can, I guess from when I did yoga daily and I could pretty much go under my feet. What would you say is the best feeling in the world? Being in love and knowing they're in love with you, too. Have you ever “spoken” to any celebrities via Twitter? No. Do you like croissants? YESSSSSSSSSSS. Do you get a lot of traffic outside your house or not? Yes. Mom explained to me why one day because I'd asked, but idr what she said. Do you eat cereal bars? No, I'm a granola bar person. Would you consider yourself healthy? Uh no. Assuming you could speak and understand the language, would you ever study in a foreign, non-English speaking country? Sure, for like a year or so! Doing that in Germany would be amazing. Are you on any prescribed medication? A lot. Do you know any immigrants? I know an illegal one that got deported. I probably know others. Have you ever lived in university or college accommodation before? No. If you haven’t already, are you scared of leaving home? If you have, do you like it? Very scared. I'm just very dependent and ignorant on how to be an adult. If you could only eat one vegetable for a year (not including potatoes) what would it be? Broccoli. Do you have a certain routine in the bath or shower? What is it? Shave, shampoo, facial scrub, this exfoliating brush for your feet, and then body wash. Is there anything that you loved a year ago but just can’t stand now? Hm. I don't really know. What’s the weirdest meat you’ve ever eaten? I took the SMALLEST bite out of it because I couldn't stomach eating it, but after a lot of convincing I tried a microscopic bit out of deer jerky. If you smoke, what brand of cigarettes do you smoke? If you don’t, have you ever tried? Don't smoke and don't want to. Do you like dried fruit at all? what’s your favorite type? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

[kpoptimeout]

Top 20 Most Underrated K-Pop Songs of the Decade (2010-2019) PART 2

The 2010s has come and gone before we knew it.  

Continuing with the K-Pop Timeout Tradition (see 2018 Ver) of listing the Top 10 Most Underrated K-Pop Songs because all the other sites are just bothered with the Top 10 that pretty much everyone will have heard of/have fan wars over, below we have created a list of the Top 20 Most Underrated K-Pop Songs of the Decade because 10 spots is not enough to cover the amount of talent slept on.

For these reasons, we have listed 10 of them here in PART 1 and will list an additional 10 in here. This is in alphabetic order NOT in the order of awesomeness because all of them are awesome. Also, all MVs are linked in the song titles because Tumblr won’t let me share that many videos in one post.

Rainbow “Sweet Dream” (2011)

The younger sister group of DSP Media’s highly successful 2nd gen girl group KARA, Rainbow never received much attention at all in comparison, never having received any music show wins since their debut in 2009. While this may be a result of DSP’s mismanagement (e.g. changing the girls’ concept from edgy to cute all of a sudden mid-way in their career and chucking them to promote in Japan before they have a solid domestic fanbase), it was never because of the quality of Rainbow’s music. Even K-Pop critics would agree that their 2011 comeback “A” is an all-time K-Pop classic. However, we would like to bring attention to “Sweet Dream”, because it is one of the best Rainbow songs ever and even more underrated than most of the songs in Rainbow’s already highly underrated repertoire. Following powerful poppy tracks like “A” and “Mach”, Rainbow appeared to be developing a style completely unique of their own in “To Me” and it reached fruition in “Sweet Dream”. It was not just poppy and powerful but showed emotional depth and the beautiful harmonies of the girls. While the girls have all left DSP Media, the girls are super close and they have chosen not to disband, thus becoming the only 2nd gen girl group still active with the full original lineup. The members even self-funded their 10th-anniversary comeback this year. If you love to support beautiful music and an even more beautiful friendship, listen to “Sweet Dream”!

RANIA “Just Go” (2013)

Newer K-Pop fans would probably just know RANIA for Alex’s brief stint in the group and making it the only girl group to ever had a Black member on its lineup. But even before Alex joining the group, RANIA had been known for breaking barriers in the conservative K-Pop industry. Their debut song “DR Feel Good”, which was originally written for Lady Gaga, was seen as too sexy by the Korean public when all they did was wear leather, get low and hair flip a lot. Their later songs continue to be powerful and amazing but it appeared that the public just chose to always label them as the “too sexy” group. “Just Go” is an example of their brilliance that the K-Pop industry was just not ready for at the time. “Just Go” is a party track carried by extremely song vocals and creative choreo where the girls interact a lot with the back dancers. The girls also wore lace full-body suits, leather jackets and actual pantsuits in different scenes throughout the MV. The song exudes so much BDE before BDE even existed as a term. If you want a confident girl group power anthem, “Just Go” is the song for you.

The SEE YA “Be With You” ft. SPEED’s Taewoon (2012)

The SEE YA was MBK Entertainment’s (formerly Core Contents Media) first ballad group after the highly successful Davichi. While Davichi is more of a pop ballad group, The SEE YA being technically a reboot of the RnB group SeeYa went for a darker sound. Their typical sound is encapsulated in their debut song “Be With You” ft. SPEED’s Taewoon, which had lovely harmonisation and also piercing high notes. The vibe of the song simply tugs at your heartstrings like a beautiful melodrama OST. Even the MV itself is a melodrama. MBK really should have promoted the group’s own music more instead of doing lots of cross-group collaborations so more people recognised The SEE YA’s own unique sound. While The SEE YA has disbanded in 2015, their music lives on as extremely underrated masterpieces. If you love dramatic ballads and K-Drama OSTS, you should check out “Be With You”!

SPEED “That’s My Fault” ft. Davichi’s Minkyung (2013)

Another talented group that unfortunately disbanded in 2016 due to MBK Entertainment’s poor management, SPEED is an exceptionally talented group that deserved so much better. Some K-Pop fans may know SPEED for their crazy choreography on heelys, but not as many know them for their vocal and rap talent. SPEED’s debut song “That’s My Fault” ft. Davichi’s Kang Minkyung is one of the rare male idol debuts that was super melodramatic and also pays homage to real historical events. The MV depicts teen love that slowly blossoms in the backdrop of the 1980s Gwangju Democratization Movement of South Korea which ended up with 144 civilian deaths, featuring the acting of Ji Changwook, Park Boyoung, A PINK’s Naeun and Ha Seokjin. For a rookie group to have the skill and emotional depth to convey such a song is rare and there are not even that many veterans groups that have made songs honouring historical events and tragedies. These qualities make it one of the most underrated songs of the decade. If you like songs that pay homage to historical events, you should check out SPEED’s “That’s My Fault”!

SPICA “Russian Roulette” (2012)

When discussing extremely talented but underrated K-Pop girl groups, SPICA would definitely be brought up in such a conversation. The members are all amazing and powerful vocalists with a lot of attitude. Even the visual member, Jiwon, was hitting the whistle register. It is unfortunate that the group was consistently slept on and disbanded in 2017 (although member Bohyung has teased at a possible reunion). It is not an overstatement to say powerful vocal girl groups like SPICA walked so groups like MAMAMOO today can run. “Russian Roulette” is their debut song but it is already K-Pop gold - it showcases every member’s vocal skills and different ranges. The whistle loop in the chorus is also super addictive and memorable. So if you love vocal-heavy girl groups and their songs, you would love SPICA’s “Russian Roulette”!

Stellar “Crying” (2016)

Mainly known for their controversial and sexual MVs, Stellar actually was a very talented group whose talent was often overlooked by controversy due to management by a company that just wanted views when their initial cute debut song “Study” did not generate enough attention. When the group disbanded in 2018, members revealed in interviews that they were uncomfortable with the concepts they had to do and would not have been an idol if they knew it would be like this. And really the company should have allowed the girls more opportunities to do concepts they enjoyed and to showcase their abilities. “Crying” is an example of Stellar’s actual stellar talents - it includes beautiful vocals and harmonies as well as some fun laid-back rap. This addictive summer track would have dominated charts if it was sung by less controversial and already established acts like Son Dambi, After School, AOA or SISTAR. If you love a good summer bop, this is the song for you!

Sunnyhill “Midnight Circus” (2011)

How often do you see a K-Pop song critiquing the harsh realities of the K-Pop industry? Rarely. And Sunnyhill’s “Midnight Circus” is one such song. With the co-ed group donning the concept of a being a dark circus troupe, the song compares the K-Pop industry to that of a circus, where people are forced to perform in dangerous conditions often against their will or in ways they are not interested in. Such insights still ring true today with idols being constantly hurt in poor working conditions or suffering immense and often fatal amounts of stress from public scrutiny. The song itself also draws heavily from instrumentals one would associate with a circus - accordion riffs, heavy usage of the fiddle and also brass instruments. The singing is also very experimental and artsy - at times the members sing like they are speaking dramatically on stage, at times they are whispering ominously. The choreography is also creative and often has the members and back dancers moving like puppets controlled by the circus *cough* K-Pop industry *cough*. The fact that the remaining members of Sunnyhill are currently wallowing in obscurity and do not even have a changing room for their group’s music show comeback stage speaks volumes of how underrated they are. If you love insightful and well-executed concepts, you would be obsessed with “Midnight Circus”!

TRAX/TraxX “Escape” (2018)

In the early 2000s, SM wanted to produce the best solo artist, the best boy band, the best boy band and the best rock band. While they achieve the first two through BoA and TVXQ, SM struggled to make CSJH and TRAX as successful. TRAX has gone through multiple concept changes over the years - from glam metal to pop-rock to ballad now in 2018, the group transitioned to EDM with the addition of DJ Ginjo and rebranding themselves as “TraxX”. A possible reason for previous failures to make TRAX succeed is how their previous styles never fully show the abilities of all members. The glam metal aspect may have helped show Jungmo’s guitar playing abilities but its unique way of singing prevents the mainstream from appreciating Jay’s vocal abilities. While pop-rock and ballad allowed more people to hear Jay’s vocal colour and wide range, it also limited Jungmo’s ability to show his guitar skills. This 2018 comeback is phenomenal and SM should have really promoted “Escape” better - finally with EDM Jay’s godly vocals and Jungmo’s rock guitar skills are unleashed in a way never seen before in K-Pop. While there has been an increase in EDM use in K-Pop this decade, no other K-Pop song has incorporated the genre into K-Pop as well as this song, which also throws in rock. If you love an amazing genre-blender, “Escape” is the song for you!

TOPPDOGG “TOPDOG” (2014)

After BLOCK B’s exit from Stardom Entertainment, the label invested heavily in TOPPDOGG, aiming to make it the Super Junior of Hip-Hop. Honestly, the company should have just marketed TOPPDOGG as the group with the hardest and most diverse rap line in K-Pop because up to this day there is still not a group with as many different and talented rappers. The group had 5 amazing rappers. They also did not lack in vocal talent at all. However, the group never took off and members started to leave to pursue careers elsewhere and the 5 remaining members have rebranded themselves as XENO-T in 2018. “TOPDOG” should have been the song that made TOPPDOGG a household name but somehow it did not. The song was powerful but not a regular powerful boy band track. Sampling Mozart's “Symphony No. 25 in G Minor”, which Mozart wrote when he was only 17, the group hoped to portray the abilities of genius youth and they really did by adding their own electronic and hip-hop flair to the orchestra piece. Even the choreography and MV goes hard and would look futuristic even today with the top-notch CGI. It is definitely one of the best K-Pop tracks of this decade that has yet to be replicated. If you are a fan of dramatic boy band bops, “TOPDOG” is the song for you!

ZE:A “Ghost of the Wind” (2013)

ZE:A, like Nine Muses, never reached their full potential under the management of Star Empire Entertainment, a label which only seems to be able to make 1-3 members of a group into superstars while keeping the whole group itself in nugudom. ZE:A had many amazing tracks but “Ghost of the Wind” is arguably the best of ZE:A and also one of the best K-Pop songs of the decade. The orchestral strings provide the song with a grand and classy atmosphere that also has a sense of urgency. This is complemented well by the theatrical choreography that the members all nailed and the belting of high notes by not one but three members. Yet somehow this song charted poorly when it was promoted and the group is now currently in an indefinite hiatus while members are all pursuing solo careers in different industries from music to even mixed martial arts. If you love an orchestral and grand boy band song, check out “Ghost of the Wind”!

Which K-Pop songs do you think were underrated throughout the decade? Leave your thoughts in the comments section below and let the song sharing begin!!!

[libraford]

ALL THE ROSE PROFILES (so far) 

Tag yourself at your own risk, there’s a lot of them. 

First photo: Coffee Break (brown, top) and Cherry Brandy (amber-pink, bottom)

Second photo:  Jade (green), Sonrisa (yellow on top), Pink Mondial (pink), Tara (yellow-green on right), Tibet (white), blueberry (purple), Neena (orange red)

Third photo:  Nina (light pink), Carpe Diem (peach)

Fourth photo: Iguana (coral, bottom left), Brighton (yellow), Ocean Song(lavendar), Black Magic (dark red), Atomic (red tipped yellow, bottom right.)

Fifth photo:  Tycoon (yellow orange) and Tiffany (peach) roses 

Sixth photo:  Shogun (purple) Brave (deep magenta) Amnesia (purple gray) and Tabasco (pink tip yellow)

Cherry Brandy is an ART MOM, even if they’re not a mom and even if they’re not related to you- if you call them ‘mom’ they will respond. Folk art, goes to craft shows and sells painted chairs. Buys way more art than they sell. Too many necklaces and rings, many layers of clothes. Stylish yet comfy. Coffee Break is Farmer’s Market Dad, despite being no one’s father and also bearing no relation to you. If there is a space in their home that has room for a bookshelf, there is a bookshelf there and by golly- there are books. The occasional cigar. It’s uncertain whether they were in the Navy, but the stories they tell certainly would imply it. Blazers and loafers.

Jade- Is all about the chill. Listens to vaporwave and trance music. Has been to at least one silent disco and would definitely go back if they could remember where it was. Manages to both never sleep and also sleep all the time. Can never find them when you need them. Sonrisa- Calls you ‘sweet pea’ and means it. Lemonade, jean shorts, and a toolbox. Knows how to carry a tune and give your truck a tune-up. Sneaks out at night even though they don’t have a curfew, no one knows where they go. Pink Mondial- is going to have the fairytale wedding that they imagined when they were six, despite not having a significant other yet. Still waiting for 'the one.’ Attempted online dating at one point but got a little freaked out by it. Prefers cake over ice cream. Tara- The party don’t start til they walk in! A real night-owl. Neon signs and headlights, cover charges and cutting in line. Always hungry, trying to fill a void. Doesn’t remember what daylight looks like. Sarcastic sense of humor to cover up low self-esteem. Tibet- T I R E D. So tired. Please just let them sleep. They are tired. Makes jokes that they don’t realize that are morbid until they tell it to the wrong person and then they feel bad about it for the next four years. Curious about death and dying, but not in a goth way- more in a science and philosophy way. But still… just… so… tired. Go to bed, Tibet. Blueberry- Will never graduate from their Emo Phase. If it’s black with a neon accent, they will buy it, wear it, and when the thing is worn into torn rags they will sew it into something else. Tries really hard to be edgy but comes off as… trying REALLY hard to be edgy. Resurrects memes from the early 2000’s as a coping mechanism. Striped socks. Invader Zim. Made you a cookie, but they eated it. Neena- The kind of artist that other artists HATE. Uses unconventional materials- melted crayons, tar paper, house paint, scrap metal. Has an entire shed dedicated to the accumulation of this stuff and even actually uses it. Knows how to weld. If you’ve got some junk you want gone, they’ll make something out of it and what’s worse? They’ll sell it for a dollar with a smug smile on their face. Youtube personality.

Nina- Shy. A popular person, but they have no idea why. Everyone wants them to become a model or actor but they get stage fright too easily and aren’t likely to change that about themselves. Prefers numbers to people, but can be coerced out to social places provided it isn’t too loud there. Carpe Diem- Just let them be a mermaid. It’s all they want. They wanted to be a marine biologist because they thought it meant they could swim with dolphins but it turns out you have to memorize a bunch of names. Hair goes down to their butt and proud of it. Flower crowns. Seashells in their jewelry. Saw Aquaman four times in theaters.

Iguana is a Crafter with a capital C. If there’s a Pinterest tutorial on it, they’ve tried to make it at least once (to the result of many failures.) Their business model is ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained.’ There is glitter. Everywhere. Their house is a mess and there’s nothing that can stop it from getting bigger. Fabric hoarder. Tends to say things like 'I’ll use it in /something/.’ Brighton used to play the flute in high school, but the competitive nature of music school has burned them out on instruments that aren’t fun. Now plays the ukelele on Youtube. Sundresses, short hair, winged eyeliner. Attempted unicycle. Has had many, many different jobs. None of them stuck. Emotional support extrovert. Ocean Song is The Sad Friend. Gets their hopes up easy and just as easily gets their feelings hurt. Just wants to stay at home and curl up in a blanket for the next century but /noooooo./ Listens to binaural beats and ASMR videos. Forgets to eat. Often. Needs someone to check on them. Black Magic is Old School Goth. Remembers when Hot Topic wasn’t a thing and is kind of glad it’s not 'the goth store’ anymore because it kind of wasn’t goth enough for them anyway (but they still shopped there. Has at least two keychains from The Old Days). Coffee. Unabashedly Bad Poetry. Despite all this? Probably the most genuinely optimistic people you’ve ever met. Atomic has spent more than one summer working for a traveling circus. Has tattoos they don’t remember getting but figures 'it’s all good.’ Rides a motorcycle and keeps a journal of their travels across the states- but it’s mostly a record of places where they’ve seen cool dogs. Tells excellent stories- who gives a crap if they’re true or not? Has been craving venison for like four years now.

Tycoon is TOTALLY RAD and knows all the best spots for surfing, snowboarding, and mountain biking. Drinks like four Monsters a day, but won’t touch alcohol after that one night they played Thumper and got too messed up over it and they swear they’re clean now. Misses Ska. Tiffany has a really, really, really strong urge to find a spot on the beach, set up an umbrella and blanket, and spend the rest of their life reading trashy romance novels there. Has at least one piece of art that says ‘live laugh love’ and it’s probably in their living room. Breakfast consists of coffee and biscotti.

Shogun is a hopeless romantic that handwrites all their letters. She loves wine a little too much, and sings ‘Total Eclipse if the Heart’ at karaoke. Brave is a woman working her way to the top of the corporate ladder and specifically asks for every Wednesday off- not because she has a prior engagement on that day but just to make herself seem like a desireable candidate by appearing to have other commitments. She spends this day at a Mexican restaurant eating bottomless tortilla chips and salsa. Amnesia has a finely-curated Instagram with a penchant for beautifully ugly things, such as graffiti or rusting structures. They carry a camera with them everywhere and think of themselves as an observer of humanity rather than a participant. Tabasco has driven the entire length of the US twice and would do it again in a heartbeat if someone told them there was a burger joint they just had to try. Unironically idolizes Guy Fieri.

[samuelnoonanstuff]

A Guide to Taking Care of Your Skin

Your skin type matters

You may suspect you have dry, oily, or sensitive skin, but do you really know your skin type? Knowing your true skin type can help the next time you’re in the cosmetics aisle. In fact, using the wrong products — or even popularized Internet hacks — for your skin type could worsen acne, dryness, or other skin problems.

Read on to learn:

how to     build your own skin care routine?

how to     treat specific skin concerns like acne or scars

which DIY     skin hacks aren’t healthy, even if they seem to work

Building a daily skin care routine

No matter what your skin type is, a daily skin care routine can help you maintain overall skin health and improve specific concerns like acne, scarring, and dark spots. A daily skin care routine has four basic steps you can do once in the morning and once before you sleep.

1. Cleansing: Choose a cleanser that doesn’t leave your skin tight after washing. Clean your face no more than twice a day, or just once, if you have dry skin and don’t wear makeup. Avoid washing for that squeaky-clean feeling because that means your skin’s natural oils are gone. Cleansers known to work well for all skin types include Cetaphil and Banila Clean It Zero Sherbet Cleanser.

2. Serums: A serum with vitamin C or growth factors or peptides would be better in the morning, under sunscreen. At night, retinol or prescription retinoids work best. Makeup Artist’s Choice has an effective vitamin C and E serum and retinol available.

3. Moisturizer: Even oily skin needs moisturizer, but use one that is lightweight, gel-based, and non-comedogenic, or doesn’t block your pores, like CeraVe’s facial lotion. Dry skin may benefit from more cream-based moisturizers like MISSHA Super Aqua Cell Renew Snail Cream. Most brands will label their products as gel or cream on their packaging.

4. Sunscreen: Apply sunscreen with at least 30 SPF 15 minutes before heading outdoors, as it takes a while for sunscreen to activate. Darker skin tones actually need more sun protection because hyperpigmentation is harder to correct. Try EltaMD’s sunscreen, which offers broad-spectrum UVA/UVB protection and is recommended by the Skin Cancer Foundation.

Choose products that fit your skin type and sensitivity, and remember to read the labels. Some products, such as retinol or prescription retinoids, should only be applied at night.

For all skin types

Stay     hydrated.

Change     pillow cases at least once a week.

Wash or     wrap up hair before bed.

Wear     sunscreen every day and apply 15 minutes before going out.

Start with a basic and simple routine to see how your skin reacts. Once you’re comfortable, you can then add extra products such as exfoliants, masks, and spot treatments to boost your skin’s health.

And don’t forget to patch test new products, especially if you suspect you have sensitive skin. This can help you identify potential allergic reactions.

To patch test a new product:

Apply a     small amount of product on your skin in a discreet area, such as the     inside of your wrist or your inner arm.

Wait 48     hours to see if there’s a reaction.

Check the     area at 96 hours after application to see if you have a delayed reaction.

An allergic reaction may include irritation, redness, small bumps, or itchiness. If you notice these symptoms, wash the area you tested with water and a gentle cleanser. Then return the product and try another that better suits your skin type.

DIY hacks to avoid (even if everyone does it)

People report wonders from using DIY hacks like lemon juice and toothpaste for common skin problems like acne bumps and dark spots. Even award-winning actress Emma Stone claims her skin care secret is baking soda. But the truth is these hacks may cause more long-term harm than benefit because they can damage your skin’s barrier.

Avoid these DIY hacks

Lemon juice: It may have     citric acidic, but it’s far too acidic and can cause dark spots to appear     after sun exposure. It can also dry and irritate your skin.

Baking soda: At a pH level     of 8, baking soda will stress your skin, significantly decrease your     skin’s water content, and cause dry skin.

Garlic: In raw form,     garlic can cause skin allergies, eczema, skin inflammation, and watery     blisters.

Toothpaste: The     ingredients in toothpaste may kill germs and absorb oil, but they can also     dry out or irritate your skin.

Sugar: As an exfoliant,     sugar is too harsh for the skin on your face.

Vitamin E: Topical     application of vitamin E can irritate your skin and is not proven to     improve scar appearance.

Some of these ingredients may be all natural and cost-effective, but they aren’t formulated for your skin. Even if you don’t feel immediate side effects, these ingredients can cause delayed or long-term damage. It’s best to use products formulated for your face. Talk to your doctor or dermatologist before trying DIY applications on your skin.

How to treat skin problems?

There are ways to tackle skin problems without damaging your skin. Just remember the number one rule of skin care: Don’t pick! Picking at acne, blackheads, scabs, or other skin problems can cause open wounds or darker skin spots known as hyperpigmentation. Open wounds can lead to infections, more acne, or scars. The deeper the wound, the more likely your skin will scar.

Here are some scientifically backed ways to treat problem areas.

Acne

Acne treatment depends on how deep or serious your acne is. Overall skin care is the most important step in treating acne, but for mild acne you can use nonprescription products from your local drugstore such as:

salicylic     acid (Stridex maximum strength acne pads)

benzoyl     peroxide (Clean & Clear Persa-Gel 10 acne medication)

alpha     hydroxy acids

adapalene

tea tree     oil

Always apply sunscreen after using these products in the morning, since they can cause extra skin sensitivity.

For immediate, inflamed, and individual pimples, you can also try acne patches or stickers. These are clear, thick patches that work as spot treatments to help promote blemish healing and prevent infections. Like blister bandages, acne patches pull out the fluid, sometimes overnight. It’s best to use these before you sleep as makeup can’t cover them.

Sebaceous filaments

Sebaceous filaments are tiny, cylinder-like tubes in your pores that are whitish yellow. These are often confused with blackheads, but blackheads are actually a type of acne that’s oxidized. Sebaceous filaments can make your pores look bigger, and you may be tempted to remove them by pinching your skin or using pore strips. But these methods may have more side effects than benefits for your skin, especially if you don’t do them properly.

Overtime, you can also cause:

irritation

open pores     and infection

dryness

redness

peeling

Topical preparations containing retinol or retinoids can help keep pores clear and clean. You may also find benefits from massaging your face with mineral or castor oil for one minute.

Another way of removing sebaceous filaments is with an extraction tool. This is a small metal instrument with a tiny circle at the end.

[echoes-of-the-clockwork]

Book One: Death (Noctis x Reader) Chapter Twenty

With Death now in his arms, Ardyn vanishes. He heads to Zegnautus Keep, where he takes the elevator to the prison block. A menacing smirk crept onto the man's face as the door slid open and he stepped out of the elevator. Turning down the hallway leading to the cells, the chancellor called out to the only other prisoner in the entire keep. "You've company, dear boy."

In the farthest cell, Prompto raised his head as he heard Ardyn's taunting voice. Confusion was written across his face as he watched the man walk down the hallway with a body in his arms. Squinting, the blonde tried to see who the person was. As Ardyn continued his approach, the boy was able to tell who the chancellor had brought. His sapphire eyes widened in fear at the sight of the familiar girl. "(Y/n)..."

Ardyn grinned at hearing Death's name only above a whisper from Prompto. "Indeed, it is. Although, she is unobtainable at the moment."

Prompto took a closer look at (Y/n) and spotted the bullet hole in her forehead. He squirmed against his restraints, causing his wrists to throb in pain. "W-What did you do to her?"

"Need not fret," Ardyn started as he approached the open cell closest to the boy. "Our dear Horseman will be well in a handful of hours." Without a care for what happened, the man tossed (Y/n)'s body into the cell. Her body slammed against the hard floor as he closed and locked the cell door. The chancellor casted another bone-chilling grin in Prompto's direction before leaving.

Once Ardyn had left, Prompto struggled against the metal device that constricted his movement. He tried to peer into the cell the chancellor had tossed (Y/n)'s body in, but he couldn't due to the strange device. He bit his bottom lip, knowing she wouldn't be able to hear him in her current condition. His head slumped down, unable to do anything.

<-------<<<<<<<<<

A couple of hours later, (Y/n)'s eyes fluttered open. She gasped for air as she raised a hand and felt her forehead. The bullet wound was healed and left no scar. Next, she checked the back of her head to make sure all of her wounds had healed without any complications.

Death slowly sat up, scanning her surroundings. She didn't recognize where she was or why she woke up in a cell. Her legs felt like jelly as she stood up and used the wall for support. All she remembered was being shot by Ardyn and everything being consumed by darkness. Her mind was still a blurry mess from the bullet and she couldn't think of what happened while in her catatonic state.

(Y/n) nearly collapsed, but she was able to grab ahold of the bars before falling to the floor. She grunted in pain, her body aching as she supported it against the bars. As Death went to try and open the cell door, she heard someone call her name from down the hall. The sound of metal clanking accompanied her name as she tried her best to look down the hall. "Prompto?"

"A-Are you okay?" He asked in concern, his voice cracking from how dry his throat was.

"Me? What about you? All of us have been sick with worry about you. Noctis told me what happened and he feels terrible about it," (Y/n) replied. "Are you hurt?"

"Just a few scratches. I mean, I haven't been stabbed or shot in the head like you. The last time I saw you was when you were bleeding out with a sword through your stomach. And then, I see you with a bullet hole in your head. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine," (Y/n) said with a small smile. "This is the only time immortality is a gift. Give me a few minutes to clear my mind and gain my bearings, then I'll get us both out of here."

"Don't push yourself, (Y/n), please," Prompto replied in a shaky tone.

"I won't."

<-------<<<<<<<

It took (Y/n) around five minutes for her mind to clear and the strength to return to her body. She stood in front of the bars, reaching out to touch them. When her index finger touched the bars, they disintegrated to ashes. With the bars gone, she stepped out of the cell and ran down the hallway to Prompto.

Clasping the bars with her hands, Death destroyed them with her deadly touch. Prompto watched eagerly as she made her way over to the metal device and placed her hands on it. The instrument crumbled into a pile of ashes, causing Prompto's body to fall. (Y/n) caught the boy before he hit the floor and steadied him on his feet. Staring at his face, the Horseman noticed the small cut on his cheek. "Are you in pain?"

Prompto nodded slightly. "Just my wrists and ankles. What're we gonna do now?"

(Y/n) held out her hands, materializing Prompto's gun. "You'll be needing this."

The marksman took his weapon, thanking Death with a small smile. "Let's go."

"I need to know something before we go-where are we?"

"Zegnautus Keep."

(Y/n) sighed and rolled her eyes. "Great. Guess we'll be searching blindly."

"At least we've got each other and aren't wandering around by ourselves," Prompto pointed out.

"That's true. Let's get going. Hopefully, the others are already here."

<--------<<<<<<<

After searching the Keep for two straight hours, the duo was exhausted from fighting magiteks and a few powerful daemons. Unlike (Y/n), Prompto wasn't able to heal his wounds and the two decided to find a place to relax for a short while. They found the sleeping quarters and entered the room, closing the door behind them.

Prompto flopped down on one of the many beds with a huff. "A bed... It's been so long!" He spread his arms out, sighing in content. His body ached from all the fighting and closed his eyes for a brief second before hearing a squeaking noise. Prompto peered over to the source of the sound and saw (Y/n) opening one of the many lockers in the back of the room.

Inside the small lockers, the Horseman found nothing. "Guess no one is living here," she comments as she closes the locker. Turning to face Prompto, she saw his pistol laid at the foot of the bed. "Is there something wrong?"

Prompto knew what (Y/n) was referring to and nodded. "I can't seem to get rid of it."

Death knew the ability to conjure weapons was due to the connection with Noctis and she assumed something must've happened on his end. The Horseman picked up the pistol and added it to her arsenal. "I'll keep it with me for the time being."

"How'd you get your hands on it, anyway?" Prompto questioned.

"Oh," she started. "I actually didn't acquire it. I just... remember what it looks like and was able to conjure it."

"Can you do that with any weapon?" The boy ecstatically asked.

"If I have enough information and details-yeah, I can."

Prompto smiled like a small child. "Oh! Do Noct's weapon!"

His smile was contagious and (Y/n) returned the gentle gesture. "Alright, let me try." She concentrated on Noctis' engine blade-all the details and the power it possessed. In the blink of an eye, the blade appeared in Death's cold, frigid hands. "See?"

After the first demonstration, Prompto was enthralled at (Y/n)'s ability and asked her summon many weapons to pass the time. The Horseman stopped summoning weapon's when she saw Prompto yawn. She smiled and sat in a chair beside the door, crossing her legs and leaning back. "Get some rest, Prom. You're gonna need it. I'll keep watch."

With another yawn, the boy nodded drowsily. "Alright. Thanks for saving me, (Y/n)." He laid down on the mattress and his eyes gradually closed.

The smile on Death's face grew. "You're welcome, Prompto."

<--------<<<<<<<

An hour passed as Prompto slept peacefully. (Y/n) knew he needed the rest and let him sleep as long as he needed. She stood from her chair and went to sit on a bed when the sound of creaking and hissing was heard from outside the room. Her head snapped up and she stared at the heavy, metal door. Glancing towards the sleeping boy, she noticed the sounds didn't wake him.

Grimacing, Death summoned her scythe and wandered out of the room to inspect the sound. Her weapon rested on her shoulder as she walked down the hall and turned right, which was the only direction she could choose. Following the sounds, (Y/n) found herself stalking a MT that's appendages were sparking and its head was twitching. One of its feet scraped against the floor as it walked with heavy footsteps. She felt no empathy towards the monster and decided to follow it a little further.

The magitek trooper led (Y/n) to a room that appeared to be a small storage area. She watched as the adversary stumbled further into the room before it hissed and began slamming its already damaged head against the wall. She watched in confusion as the MT continued to ram its head into the wall, not caring if the creature killed itself. The loud clanking of the monster slamming its head against the wall filled the room as the Horseman continued to watch. She dispelled her scythe, watching as the magitek raised its weapon and stabbed itself in the abdomen. Luckily, (Y/n) was a safe distance away when its body exploded into pieces. "Must've been malfunctioning," the girl muttered to herself.

Death turned on her heels and headed to the door, but she abruptly stopped when she heard footsteps approaching. She went to hide, but she realized there was no decent place to hide and the people or creatures approaching would find her. She was about to summon her scythe when the door slid open and revealed the owner of the footsteps. Her (e/c) eyes widened as they met another wide pair of familiar azure eyes. "Noctis?" Behind him, she saw Gladio and Ignis standing outside of the room.

Noctis cautiously approached (Y/n) as if she was going to pounce on them if he moved too fast. She watched his every move, slowly taking steps towards her. She was utterly confused why he was treating her like a cornered coeurl. She raised a brow as he circled around her. "What are you doing?" Then, he stopped directly in front of her and reached out to touch her. His hands landed on her cheeks and began pulling on them. She winced from the sudden skin pulling and swatted his hands away. "What is with you, Noctis?"

"You're real, right?" He asked unsurely.

In response, (Y/n) placed her hands on his cheeks and pulled at them. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"For the past hour, that bastard has been using illusions of you and Prompto against us," Gladio answered. "And sometimes, you'd attack without warning."

"That makes sense. But, really?!" Death huffed, glaring lightly at Noctis. "Pulling on my cheeks and circling me like you're about to be mauled? You could've just-"

Death didn't get to finish her rant as Noctis had stolen a kiss from her lips. She was surprised at the sudden kiss and didn't kiss back until it was too late. The kiss was short, but then, Noctis cupped her cheeks and pulled her closer to him. He examined her forehead as one of his hands traveled to the back of her head, feeling around as they ran through her inky locks. (Y/n) knew he was checking the wounds she received from the bullet and allowed him to continue.

After a long silence, Noctis sighed and leaned his forehead against (Y/n)'s shoulder. Death remained still as his other hand fell from her cheek and landed on her other shoulder. "How long has it been?" The Horseman asked, slicing through the silence.

Noctis raised his head and stared into her beautiful eyes. "Several hours."

"What happened?"

The boy told all that happened during the time Ardyn captured her and when they arrived at Zegnautus Keep. (Y/n) learned the chancellor had sealed off Noctis' power and he wasn't able to summon his weapons. Luckily, he had the Ring of the Lucii and found his father's sword, completing his collection of royal arms.

Once Noctis finished his explanation, (Y/n) decided to share some good news. "Prompto's safe. He's resting in a nearby sleeping quarters. I'll take you to him."

[whumphoarder]

You Broke Tony

Summary: Peter stumbles into the tower one evening, clearly injured and in need of assistance. Cue a very agitated and sleep deprived Tony trying to make sense of what happened.

Word count: 2,180

Genre: Fluffy angst

A/N: This is set sometime between Homecoming and Infinity War, but my head canon is that Tony buys back Avenger’s Tower because he is a fickle man and also someone has to keep an eye on Spider-Man.

Link to read on Ao3

Tony had been holed up in his workshop non-stop for the past three days. He had just begun his newest project—a massive overhaul for the Iron Man armor in which he would finally integrate nanotechnology to create a fully retractable suit. It had been a difficult and tedious process thus far, evidenced by the bags under his eyes and borderline-dangerous levels of caffeine flowing through his system.

So when FRIDAY first interrupted the AC/DC album blasting over the speakers that evening to report that Peter Parker was standing in the tower’s entryway, Tony was confused.

“Huh? What day is it?” he asked the AI stupidly.

“It’s Thursday,” the female voice replied. “Peter is inquiring if you’re home.”

Okay, good. So at least he hadn’t lost complete track of time and skipped to the weekend. He glanced up at the clock and saw it was half-past eight. Peter had likely just stopped in during a patrol—a rare occurrence, but not completely unprecedented. The tower had free WiFi after all.

Unfortunately, Tony wasn’t in the mood for visitors. “Tell him I’m busy working on something right now but he can let himself in. There are those pudding cups he likes in the fridge—butterscotch, since he’s sixteen going on eighty.”

Tony resumed his work, switching out wires and adjusting settings. After a moment, the AI relayed, “He says thank you, and also wonders if you have any old towels he can borrow, preferably ones that can get stained."

“Direct him to the linen closet,” Tony said distractedly. With pliers, he tugged at a wire inside one of the suit’s gauntlets. It sparked at him, causing him to jerk his hand back. “Rude,” he remarked at the armor.

After another pause, FRIDAY reported, “He is unable to make it to the closet and is requesting assistance.”

Another attempt to adjust the wires only caused more sparks, this time with one flying off and igniting an oily rag on the workstation. Dum-E whirred to life, ready to douse it. “Hey, no! You stand down!” Tony commanded the robot. He quickly smothered the small flame with a metal pan to extinguish it.

The bot whirred at a lower pitch, sounding disappointed.

“Yeah, that’s right,” he quipped back. “If I have to clean that foam off one more time, I’m powering you down.” To FRIDAY, he replied, “So send Happy.”

“Mr. Hogan is off for the evening, Boss,” the AI responded.

“Send Pepper then,” he said, annoyed.

“Ms. Potts is currently still in Japan on business. Peter is also wondering if you have any ibuprofen.”

That finally got Tony’s attention. He sighed deeply and put down his instruments. “Tell him I’m on my way.”

“Right away, Boss. Though you should know he seems quite distressed at this information and is insisting he’ll clean everything up himself.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet he is,” Tony muttered back.

X

A few minutes later, a rather grimy-looking Tony stepped out of the elevator, carrying several towels and a bottle of painkillers. “Not sure why you think I’m your butler now,” he grumbled as he approached, “but FRIDAY said you needed…” Tony froze mid-step. His eyes went wide as he took in the scene before him. “Aw, shit! What did you do?!"

Peter startled at the exclamation. He’d been sitting on the floor near the building’s entrance, one leg extended out in front of him and the other bent so he could rest his head against his knee. He still wore the Spider-Man suit—except for the mask, which was clutched in one hand—and appeared dazed.

But by far the most concerning observation was the fact that the teenager was completely covered in blood.

“Oh, hey Mr. Stark,” he said, his voice a bit slurred. “I’m really sorry to bother you, I just wasn’t sure where to go...”

In an instant, Tony had closed the distance between them. Dropping to his knees beside Peter, he threw the towels down and grabbed the kid by the shoulders. “Karen, report!”

“She’s offline,” Peter muttered. “That’s why I couldn’t call. I’m really sorry, Mr. Stark, I’ll clean everything up, I swear.” He reached out for a towel, but Tony swatted his hand away.

“Oh no you don’t. You’re gonna hold still and explain why my lobby looks like the set of a student-directed slasher film,” Tony commanded. He was running his hands over Peter’s limbs urgently, checking for entry wounds or damage to the suit that would indicate where the blood was coming from.

Peter seemed nervous now. “I’m really sorry, I don’t think it will stain, I just - ah!” He let out a hiss of pain as Tony’s hand brushed against a lump on the back of his head.

Tony’s brow furrowed. “That hurts?”

Peter gave a slight nod. “But it’s not so bad…"

Tony scoffed as he pulled his hand away to get a closer look. Amazingly, that part of his head was one area of Peter not covered in blood. Deciding this would be easier if he could see actual flesh, he pressed the spider insignia on the front of the suit. The fabric immediately loosened.

“Wait, what are you doing?” Peter panicked.

Tony was already working to free the boy’s shoulders and upper body from the material. “Getting this off,” he answered simply.

“What? No!” Peter cried. His words ran together as he begged. “No please don’t take the suit! I’m really sorry, Mr. Stark, I didn’t mean to mess up, I’ll do better, I promise!”

The suit only half removed, Tony stopped. “Hey, hey, look at me,” he said urgently. He tilted Peter’s chin up to him and saw there were tears welling up in the corners of the kid’s eyes. “I’m not taking the suit away and I don’t give a single shit about the floor,” Tony said firmly. “But I need to know where you’re hurt. So either you tell me right now, or I figure it out myself.”

Sniffing, Peter blinked back the tears that were threatening to fall. “It-It’s not too bad. I just hit my head and I think I sprained my ankle or something—”

That was when Tony’s patience ran out. “The blood, Peter!” he interrupted. “Talk about the blood! Like where is it coming from?”

Peter frowned, looking confused. Then suddenly something seemed to click in his addled brain.

"Oh, no Mr. Stark. This isn’t my blood,” he said simply.

Of all the things Tony had expected to hear from the young hero, that was definitely not one of them. He stiffened, the feeling of icy horror flowing through him. “Whose is it?”

Peter’s eyes widened. “Oh, no, sorry! I mean it’s not anyone’s! It’s not real.” Seeing as Tony looked unconvinced, he dragged his finger across one of the crimson splotches on his suit and licked it. “See? It’s like red-dyed corn syrup and glycerin or something.”

Tony’s head was swimming. “So you’re not bleeding? Not anywhere?”

“I’m not bleeding,” Peter confirmed.

Letting out a massive exhale, Tony shifted his weight until he was sitting back on his butt rather than his knees. He used his jeans to wipe the crimson liquid off his hands before balling them into fists and pressing them to his eyes in exasperation. “Alright, start talking, kid. Why in god’s name are you sitting on the floor of my building covered in fake blood? Because if this is some kind of prank, allow me to remind you I have a heart condition, and so help me I will—”

“It’s not a prank.” Peter squeezed his eyes shut and let out a sigh almost as big as his mentor’s. “Alright. I was on patrol,” he began, “and I noticed this mugging going down—it was in an alleyway between a CVS and… Uh, you know those temporary stores that pop up around October and sell costumes and decorations and stuff? But then they’re gone again in November?”

“Yeah, I know what you’re talking about. Go on,” Tony prompted with a hand wave.

“One of those. I yelled at the mugger guy to get his attention and when he spun around I tried to web him up like usual. But my web-shooter jammed. I think it’s because of this new web fluid formula I’ve been using,” Peter rambled. “Actually, Mr. Stark, I was gonna ask you about that because it seemed awesome in all the lab tests but it’s been clumping sometimes now and I can’t figure out exactly why...”

“We’ll work on it later. Keep talking, kid."

“Right. Uh, I had to hit the web-shooter a couple times and finally got it unclogged, but by then he had already run off. But the lady he was mugging—she was real nice by the way, told me thank you like a hundred times—she said she saw him duck into that costume store.”

“And you went after him?” Tony guessed.

“Yeah. It was kinda funny actually.” Peter gave a lopsided grin. “He had a wig on and was like, trying to get into this giant bumblebee costume, like he thought he could blend in or something. But he was the only person in the store except for one middle-aged Asian lady at the register, so it was super obvious. Then I shot a web at his feet to trip him, and that worked, but uh, turns out he had a knife and—”

“Did he hurt you?” Tony interrupted.

“Well, he tried but—”

Immediately, Tony started trying to pull the rest of the suit off again and find whatever injury Peter was hiding.

“No, no Mr. Stark, he missed!” Peter said quickly. Tony relaxed again as Peter continued his recount. “He threw the knife at me and I jumped out of the way, no problem. But then I sorta crashed into this display shelf, and that knocked a bin over which was full of these little plastic bags. And then I landed on them, so a bunch of them burst open...”

“Let me guess.” Tony sighed exasperatedly. “Fake blood.”

“It was everywhere,” Peter said miserably. “I sorta smacked my head on the counter too…” He ran his fingers over the lump on his skull, wincing.

Tony frowned. “Okay. We’ll get that checked in a minute. What about the ankle?”

Peter’s cheeks flushed red. “Uh, the guy got back up and was starting to run again, so I shot another web at him, but now my head hurt and I couldn’t really see straight and I missed. I tried to get up so I could try again and I sorta, uh… slipped.”

Tony blinked at him. “You slipped.”

Peter’s voice was barely audible as he muttered, “...I slipped on the blood.”

Perhaps it was sleep deprivation from too many consecutive hours in the lab that caused what happened next, or maybe it was simply the relief that his young charge was not actively dying combined with the ludicrous image of a spandex-clad teenage superhero wiping out in a pool of fake blood in the props section of a Halloween City. But whatever it was, this particular piece of information suddenly caused the billionaire to do something he almost never did.

Tony Stark giggled.  

Not just laughed, but actually giggled. And once he had started, he couldn’t seem to stop. To Peter’s absolute horror, Tony giggled and giggled until his shoulders shook and tears streamed down and no sound was coming out of his mouth anymore.

The kid was at a total loss. “Mr. Stark…? Are you okay?”

“I’m s-sorry, k-kid!” Tony choked out between gasps. “It’s n-not funny - it’s really not! But you - you fucking slipped on the blood that you spilled!” He dissolved into yet more giggles. “That’s downright poetic, is what it is.”

Peter wasn’t seeing the humor. He hung his head in shame. “The mugger, um - he got away after that.”

Eventually, Tony managed to pull it together. He wiped the tears out of his eyes with his sleeve and took a few deep breaths. “Alright, I’m sorry.” In a serious tone, he asked, “This happened in on patrol, right? How did you end up here?”

Peter shrugged. “I didn’t know where else to go. Karen was offline so I couldn’t call—I think some of the blood got inside and shorted something out? I’m not sure—and I knew I needed to clean the suit, but it’s not like I could put it in my Aunt’s washing machine.” He sighed deeply and admitted, “Plus my head hurt a lot and I couldn’t walk very well so it was hard to think of other options.”

“Wait a minute,” Tony said, frowning. They might have a serious PR problem on their hands. “Are you telling me you swung the whole way from Queens to Manhattan, dripping in blood?”

“No, of course not!” Peter looked offended at the accusation. After a beat he said, “I took the subway.”

Tony let out yet another massive exhale. “Of course you did, kiddo. Of course.”

Fic Masterlist

[grimelords]

My November playlist is finished and I've done something slightly different by actually ordering the songs into a cohesive playlist rather than leaving them in the order I added them. Listen in for everyone's favourite genre, acoustic guitar instrumentals, followed by old fashioned cowboy country, comedy and ridiculous songs, 80s and modern dance, out-there piano instrumentals, rocks and rolls, oddball rap, christian rock buried where nobody will find it, noise rock of all flavours and Mirror Reaper in full. I guarantee there'll be at least something in four hours of music that you'll like. listen here!

Deixa - Toquinho: I love how much happens in this song even before it even kicks off at about a minute in. It cycles through so many different feelings before it really powers up and the drums come on. The rhythm from then on is just mesmerizing, it's just so busy and never dwells on any section for too long, the interplay between the melody, bassline and chord rhythm is amazing. And then at about 2:20 it powers up again! Bossa Nova Strong. Also I'm feeling very disrespected because I just did some research on this song only to find out it was sampled by Nujabes on one of his bad anime youtube hip hop songs.

Just A Closer Walk With Thee - Marisa Anderson: Traditional And Public Domain Songs is Marisa Anderson's weakest album, which is a shame because I love Traditional and Public Domain songs. Her playing is on point as always, but the tremolo and distortion she's using overwhelms the recording more often than not. This song is the best on the album purely because she's playing so quietly that it only shows up when she gets loud so it works perfectly near the end as it crescendos.

The Three Deaths Of Red Spectre - Gwenifer Raymond: Gwenifer Raymond has a new 'non-holiday specific single for a cold climate' in her words and I absolutely love it. The sheer velocity of the middle section is flooring, before it breaks apart totally and reforms into a sort of shanty before metamorphosing again into a heightening mania. I love the constantly shifting structure of this, it barely stops to give you room to breathe all the way through before the very end where it almost feels like it's going to collapse entirely.

Mister Sandman - Chet Atkins: Happy to report that I've had Mr Sandman stuck in my head for three weeks now and still don't really know the words because of tumblr posts. It alternates between 'mr email / e me a mail / make the attachment a pic of a snail' and 'mr sandman / sand me a man / make him the cutest man car door hook hand'.

Do I Ever Cross Your Mind - Chet Atkins & Dolly Parton: I've never gone much on Chet Atkins but my girlfriend showed my this song and it has completely reversed my opinion and it's mostly due to Dolly Parton. She is just so lovely on this it makes me tear up - the song itself is so nice and the playing is perfect but her personality just shines through so brightly it's an absolute delight.

There's A Man Going Around Taking Names - Lead Belly: I've been doing research to try to find out what this song is referring to, or its origin but I cannot find anything concrete. A few people are saying it inspired Johnny Cash for The Man Comes Around, which is plausible and adds a mystic bent to it. It seems incomplete, like it's missing the turn at the end that reveals who exactly he is or what's happening so the whole song just ends up feeling very mysterious and ominous.

When Mussolini Laid His Pistol Down - Merle Travis: This song is from 1943, which is sort of amazing because that means it's not a song about history particularly but rather current events. A great paragraph from wikipedia: "On 24 June Mussolini gave his last important speech as prime minister. It went down in history as the "boot topping" speech, with the Duce promising that the only part of Italy that the Anglo-Americans would be able to occupy (but forever and horizontally, i.e. as corpses) was the shore-line (for which he used a wrong word to define it). For many Italians, that confused and incoherent speech was the final proof that something was wrong with Mussolini." Mussolini, truly history's greatest moron.

The Master's Call - Marty Robbins: As a result of Red Dead 2 and my own natural instincts, I've been having a bigger than usual moment with cowboy music this month which of course includes Marty Robbins' Gunfighter Ballads And Trail Songs. In my mind this song is both the true ending and end credits music of Red Dead 2. Arthur sees the face of Christ in a lightning bolt and abandons his life of crime and sin, pleading with the lord to forgive him and then God kills a hundred cows with another lightning bolt just to make damn sure Arthur knows He's serious.

Saga Of The Ponderosa - Lorne Green: I was hanging out with my old housemate a few weeks ago and it turns out we were both having concurrent Marty Robbins cowboy music phases which was great news because then he turned me onto this album by Lorne Green who was on Bonanza and apparently took it upon himself to expand the Bonanaza Cinematic Universe in the 60s with a few albums. This song is apparently an origin story of Bonanza which I have never seen. It's extremely good, very powerful music. Great story of this godlike man striding across the country and overriding his wife's decision by naming his son HOSS.

Hard Sun - Eddie Vedder: I think it's interesting in A Star Is Born that Jackson Maine doesn't seem to be a real life equivalent of any actual musician. He's not obviously an archetype of any real person and so it's hard to place how exactly famous he is in the world of the movie. He's washed up enough to be playing pharmaceutical conferences but still has enough industry respect to be playing a tribute at the Grammys. The closest I could think of was Eddie Vedder oddly enough, and this song from the Into The Wild soundtrack really does sound like a Jackson Maine original.

For Chan - Tim Heideker: I'm having a real thing with comedy music recently and I can't tell if it means I've got a brain parasite or comedy music is good to me now. I think what I like about this song is the bluntness. There's no two ways about these people, and after years of hearing about the alt right as mysterious political genius computer brains it's a nice break to just hear them called greasy fat basement guys like we used to.

That's Right I'm Five - Don't Stop Or We'll Die: More good comedy music! They played this song on Comedy Bang Bang without announcing what it was called first, so the chorus really surprised me and made me laugh a lot. "They're selling the stocks so buy them, launch the torpedoes, tell my wife I love her, and send my son to college, bury me in the desert in my osh kosh b'gosh - that's right I'm five!" might be my favourite lyric of the year.

Future Brain - Den Harrow: Den Harrow is very good. He's like a beautiful moron American man that some italian scientists built in a lab in order to conquer America from the inside. Here are some good highlights from his wiki article: "The name Den Harrow was conceived by producers Roberto Turatti and Miki Chieregato, who based it on the Italian word denaro(money)." "After years of fame and popularity, it was revealed by frontman Stefano Zandri and his producers that Zandri did not actually sing the Den Harrow songs; he was essentially a character who lip-synched to vocals recorded by a number of other singers. Furthermore, since they did not consider Zandri's name and origin to be "trendy" enough, the producers R. Turatti and M. Chieregato concealed Zandri's Italian origin, marketing him as having been born Manuel Stefano Carry in Boston. This was done so Polydor Records could market him more easily in the English-speaking world, where Italian-produced music was, at the time, viewed with skepticism"

Love A Girl Right - Little Mix: Check out this rewrite of the Thong Song they did for the new Little Mix album. It's beyond belief. My girlfriend loves Little Mix and she's right to because they're the only girl/boy band that actually takes advantage of the form and does harmonies instead of just having them all sing in turn or all at once. They've got good vocal arrangements but they have the worst fucking songwriters working for them. Songwriters that pitch 'what if the Thong Song had a crunchy nu-metal guitar in it'.

This City Made Us - The Protomen: It's interesting to hear a band change styles - most other Protomen songs are a sort of Springsteen pastiche but this one from their newer single is more like Iron Maiden or Thin Lizzy. Approaching the 80s from a different angle. It's impressive to switch so radically and still have enough of a unifying sound that it feels like the same band. 80s throwback rock is a generally pallid genre populated by freaks who can't move on but Protomen put so much heart into it it's hard to write them off.

Teardrops - Womack & Womack: I love this song because it has two choruses. The drums stay the same throughout, the chords stay the same through the verse and chorus and only change for the second chorus/bridge part ("the music don't feel like it did when I felt it with you"), which just gives the whole song this feeling of beautiful endlessness. It goes and goes and goes and you're always already living in the best part of the song.

Boys Will Be Boys - The Duncan Sisters: Very very good piece of disco with a very nice piece of country picking guitar near the start for some reason. I quit like that the chorus of 'boys, oh boys, will be boys - they can really hurt you!' goes from a lighthearted thing about relationships until the bridge near the end where it sounds more like a dire warning. She's staring straight into your eyes and saying 'they can hurt you. boys can hurt you. they can really hurt you.' while motioning toward the exit with her eyes. 

Ayaya - Bicep: I've been trying to train my ear a bit better so I got a piano app on my phone and I just try to pick out the melodies of songs now when I'm bored. It turns out this is a very satisfying song to play. The melody is very simple, but the constant build and the couple of other melodies that come in around it make you feel like a super genius for just playing the same thing over and over.

The Call - David Mayer: I completely forget how I came across this song but I'm in love with the vocals on it. The effect reminds me of the one on Problem With The Sun by Nicolas Jaar, sort of pitched down and layered over itself. Outside of the vocals it's a pretty straightforward euro house chunk but damn sometimes a song just has a really good sound in it that you can't deny.

Problem With The Sun - Nicolas Jaar: My girlfriend's brother was telling me he was riding his bike the other day and had some kind of mental break where he was riding north in the afternoon but the sun was on his right, in the east - and for some reason his first instinct wasn't that he was wrong or disoriented, it was that there was a problem with the sun and it was in the wrong place. That boy ain't right but this song is good. I love that Nicolas Jaar uses this weird down pitched voice on a few songs and I really wish he'd bring it back, it sounds great and also funny to me.

Ensaslayi - Cecil Taylor: I don't have the brain power to comprehend any of Cecil Taylor's ensemble work that I've heard, free jazz in a band setting is simply too much for me it turns out -but I've really been getting a lot out of this solo album of his called Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly!. This song in particular is one of the longer ones on the album, where another is only 53 seconds long and a few last around ten minutes. This is a nice midpoint, where he gives himself so much room to get lost in different directions without losing the thread entirely. I said it last time I was talking about him but I've really never heard anyone play piano like this and I absolutely love it. A lot of reviewers describe it as him playing the piano like it's a drumkit, which I think is accurate to a degree - but I think looking back from here this music makes a lot more sense within the context of black midi and things like that. The extreme edges of what a piano can theoretically do, but with a decisive and beautiful human edge and human brain that's responsible for and making sense of the chaos.

The Homeless Wanderer - Emahoy Tsegué-Maryam Guèbrou: I found out about this album cause Benjamin Booker was posting about her on his instagram story and it's just incredible. The TL;DR of her story is she's an Ethiopian nun that studied music in Switzerland and Cairo and wrote this beautiful piano music based on traditional Ethiopian pentatonic music. I love the rhythm of it, every note in the right hand get swirled around and around before it's settled on while the left hand moves so smoothly and delicately. Unfortunately-ish she's obviously in that genre of Searching For Sugarman secret blog music evidenced by her spotify similar artists being Karen Dalton, Alice Coltrane and Connie Converse. That's not a bad thing exactly, at least people are hearing about her, but her music is unique and amazing enough on its own without needing much mythologizing.

Carnival Of The Animals: No 12 - Fossils - Camille Saint-Saëns: My girlfriend was showing me Saint-Saëns' The Swan and then we were going through the whole rest of the Carnival Of The Animals and I'm happy to report that he not only did he do one for fossils but also centered it around the idea of a bone xylophone. I'm going to write an article for Vulture tracing the origin of the cartoon bone xylophone and my thesis is it starts here.

Perth - Bon Iver: Just thinking about how good Bon Iver is. I love how massive this song can feel, the drums combined with the big brass. It's small and soft on the grand scale, but on an album that gets as quiet and soft as songs like Holocene this song blows up like an atom bomb.

Yet Again - Grizzly Bear: This really is one of the best songs of all time I've decided. It feels like I get into a thing of listening to it on repeat almost every month now. I don't know what it is exactly - I guess it's every part of it. The lyrics are impenetrable (check) the riff is simple and powerful (check) the drums are doing a lot and keeping it simple at the same time. The the way the harmony vocals all intertwine in the prechorus part is amazing. The way the whole song blows up into a big radio static solo at the end. Every part of this song is great, I just love it.

Fuckin N' Rollin - Phantastic Ferniture: I found out that Julia Jacklin has a side project with a very shit name and they make very good music. I love when people have a whole other band for another side of their self. This is just Julia Jacklin if the lyrics were just first draft whatevers instead of incredibly poignant and beautiful and the music was just rockin and rollin with your friends. It's great!

Soft - Kings Of Leon: Number one best song ever about havin a bad dick!! I'd love to hang out lady but my dick! I'm passed out in your garden, I'm in I can't get off I'm so soft! I'd pop myself in you body, I'd come into your party but I'm soft!

Soft Serve - Soul Coughing: I played this while I was driving with my girlfriend and she said 'what the fuck is this' and she's right, as usual. It's Soul Coughing baby! The 90s 'slacker jazz' band! They sound dated as fuck, a real product of their time but I think they've still got a lot to offer. I had the chorus of this stuck in my head for a couple days which made me listen to this album more than usual when I mostly prefer their first one Ruby Vroom. Irresistible Bliss might have the worst album cover of all time though, so it's got that going for it. Google it.

Ya Mama - Wuf Ticket: There wiki article for this band says they had two songs in 1982 and that was it. Then it has a section titled Greaseman and then the article ends. Here's the Greaseman section in its entirety: "Wuf Ticket's “Ya Mama” achieved its greatest notoriety, and airplay, as a music bed for bits by shock jock The Greaseman on WWDC-FM in Washington, D.C. and later his nationally syndicated radio show where Greaseman would argue with a surly service industry worker." Anyway this is more of that very good early hip hop shit where everyone assumed songs should go for 8 minutes. It's just extremely weak sauce Ya Mama jokes for a very long time before they change tack completely and start talking about how Every Woman Is An Angel And Without Mothers We Would Never Have Been Born So Think About That Next Time.

Gon Be Okay - Lil B: I had the part of this song where he sings 'things are never gonna be the same again' along with the piano in my head the other day and spent fully an hour googling to try to find what song it was from before giving up. I woke up the next morning and suddenly remembered it was this song but was very shocked to find out that he actually never sings that line along with the piano melody, he says it once at the start and that's it. What's going on with my brain. Anyway in my searching I found out that the piano is sampled from the Spirited Away soundtrack so once more in my life I've been led to ruin by anime.

2 Minute Drills - Allblack & Kenny Beats: This whole EP is great. More sports themed rap please. Allblack is ferocious and Kenny's production throughout is great, the perfect mix of simple straighforward beats that still have a lot of space and energy in them, plus 'Woah Kenny!' has my award for Best New Producer Watermark.

Don't Gas Me - Dizzee Rascal: I don't know how he keeps doing it but somehow Dizzee Rascal continues to make extremely fun bangers without ever slowing down. The best line in this is when he says "no I don't drink Appletiser" (the sparkling apple juice) which is an extremely weird flex if there ever was one.

Acid King - Malibu Ken: It feels insane that a Tobacco and Aesop Rock collab sounds as good as this. I love that there's no drums the entire time he's rapping and I completely love the Mort Garson vibes in the instrumental which turns out to be a perfect soundtrack to the Ricky Kasso satan worship LSD murder story that Aesop's telling. Also in reading about Kasso I just discovered the very good stoner doom band also named Acid King, so expect to see them in next month's list.

Pirate Blues - As Cities Burn: As Cities Burn have reformed and put out a new single so I've been thinking about them a bit. On paper they don't sound good, over three albums they morphed from a christian metalcore band to a christian alt-rock band, and while they never reinvented the wheel I think they're a remarkable band who took a lot of risks in their own way and made a lot of rock solid music. They've got a lot of great songs but I think this is my favourite from their third album when it finally felt like they'd settled into a steady alt rock sound informed by their much heavier past.

This Is It, This Is It - As Cities Burn: The thing I like about As Cities Burn is that as much as they're a christian band (yuck) they're more of a band of guys who are christians (slightly less yuck) and the difference is huge. Rather than evangelising or preaching, their songs are about their own personal struggles with their faith (still slightly yuck). I like this song especially because the lyric feels close to gospel, 'we're all singing for our sins, unless grace be the wind' but with the added twist of being furious that you're trapped by the sin of your physical body.

Timothy - As Cities Burn: I think this song is just incredible. The lyrics are so strong and direct and heartbreaking, the vocal performance especially is amazing and it may be the only time in history that a 6 minute guitar solo has seemed good and necessary.

Face Tat - Zach Hill: There's an incredible video of the recording of this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGi9SOFX5rc that really looks exactly how it sounds and has a very similar energy to that video of 80 guys singing the halo theme in the boys bathroom. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRG9KwvbVhk . This is what it sounds like when the boys are left alone. The biggest draw to Zach Hill's drumming is the intense primordial immediacy of it. He is just pounding away like a possessed animal and it's really on show here, especially combined with the occasional punctuating shout. Carson McWhirter's guitar is incredible too, the tone he's got where it sounds like three at once playing these incredible twisting riffs that turn on a dime. I think what I like most about this song is just how in sync they are - for such a chaotic, noisy song it sounds so rehearsed, somehow every single note is perfectly in time in the storm.

Betty's Worry Or The Slab - Hunters And Collectors: This is maybe the sweatiest song I've ever heard. It's a disgusting song about being incredibly sweaty and horny and I love the weird squeaky noise he makes after he says 'say it! say it!'. The bass sound in this is so fantastically meaty too, and combined with the brass at the end it's just great.

Worms Of The Senses / Faculties Of The Skull (live) - Refused: I cannot believe just how absolutely ferocious live Refused is. Insanely powerful without ever missing a beat in a song like this that requires incredible timing throughout. For some reason I've always thought Refused were an only ok live band after watching Refused Are Fucking Dead because all I remember of it is a clip where the guitarist accidentally hits the singer in the face with his headstock and they have to stop the show.

Mirror Reaper - Bell Witch: I got to see Bell Witch live a couple of weeks ago and it's one of the best shows I've ever seen. I can't really describe it other than it feels like the closest thing to a legitimate summoning ritual that I've ever seen. An invocation and an expelling of raw power and emotion between two people, it was really something. Also the best part was about two minutes in when they were really setting the scene with the sort of ambient beginning of Mirror Reaper and the whole crowd was dead silent and entranced as they built this mystic atmosphere and set the vibe a guy behind me said loudly to his friend 'hm pretty good so far!'

What's You Gonna Do When The World's On Fire - Lead Belly & Anne Graham: This is in my opinion the best genre of gospel song where they they just roast you for not being saved yet.​ 

listen here

[bondedbrotherhoodau]

Complicated - part 2

Written by @VishousBDB_ and @YesImAGlowstick  (AU)

*~*~*~*~*

Lassiter:

“You’re a pain in the ass, y’know that?”

I didn’t care if he was shot. The second I started taking it easy on the goateed motherfucker was the second he’d eat me alive. And no, I’m not sure there was a pun intended there either.

The underground storage space near one of the highway bridges had been the best I could do at short notice. Already I could hear and feel the stream of cars that signalled the humans getting up, going about their days and driving to work. I, meanwhile, got to try and patch up a vampire that appreciated help about as much as he appreciated a sand paper enema.

The Brotherhood owned this little bolt hole for, I suspect, these exact circumstances; life threatening situations in which vampires cannot dematerialize home and need some place to wait the sun out. Which meant it had supplies: a little food, a little water, and halle-fucking-lujah, a med kit.

I would’ve preferred a doctor, mind, but in the process of getting the demi-god here, my phone had up and died. V’s was nowhere to be found, leading me to believe he’d lost it in the fight and the act of getting shot. Clever fucker that he was. Which meant I was up shit creek as far as calling for Manny or Doc Jane; y’know, the two people actually trained to handle this shit.

“V, can we make a memo that all these little bunkers need to be better equipped for next time,” I muttered, rifling through the kit and taking out the gauze, bandages, forceps and anything else I was going to need. “I’d settle for a live in doctor or, gee, maybe a phone charger.”

Not bothering with foreplay, I lifted the male to strip his coat, then ripped the shirt away. I flashed back to the fact I’d only seen this body, in far better condition, a few hours earlier. Looking down at the bullet wound, I cursed softly and grabbed a wad of gauze, applying pressure to keep all that bright crimson from seeping out.

“Alright Doc V, talk me through this shit. What do you want me to do?”

Vishous: *The angel had managed to get my ass to one of the bunkers we had for short emergencies. I was in and out on the way here. His body heat warmed me up. It was freezing and the adrenaline was long gone. I was shaking and the pain was pretty fucking extreme. My diamond eyes met his.* “ Is there any liquor in that duffle?” *I managed a smirk. I didn’t want to angel to worry but I had lost a lot of blood. And fuck me my chest wouldn’t stop bleeding. On top of that I was sure the bullet was still inside.*

Lassiter:

If he hadn’t already been bleeding out, I would’ve smacked him.

“Oh, sure. Jokes at a time like this. You’re so fucking /clever/,” I growl, pushing a little harder onto the wound with my failing gauze pad. “Seriously, you miserable fuck, talk me through this. I’m not a doctor, no, but I’ve been round long enough to know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

And I’m not going to let you die, I thought, taking a steadying breath. No way, no how. Looking around, I eyeballed the table across the room, by the other medical supplies.

“We’re moving. Here.”

I grabbed his hand and put it in place where mine had been, stemming the flow of blood. Before V could protest I had my arms under him, hoisting him up and carrying him across the room. He groaned, the sound grating down my spine as I acknowledged he was in pain.

Setting the male down on the table, I flicked on the lights and reached for whatever medically inclined tool, bag or supply was close, dragging everything to be in easy reaching distance.

“This is what we’ve got to work with,” I heard myself say, eyeing the instruments, forceps and what not. “So tell me. Or so help me Creator I’m going in blind all ‘Don’t Touch The Sides’ like.”

Vishous: *It fucking hurt when he moved me to the table. I almost wanted to throw up. His tone was serious as he placed the medical tools beside me. His eyes looked pleading. Dying here was easy. Even if I wanted to give up the angel would not let me. My hand was still pressed to the wound on my chest near my scarred shoulder. My hand was soaked* “You saved me. I owe you one Lassiter. I’m going to walk you through and try not to pass out from shock. Ive lost alot if blood and I will need to feed after. The bullet is still in my chest you will need to get it out and fast. As soon as I move my hand away, I’m going to bleed out. I am almost sure it nicked a subclavian artery. You are going to douse the tools in alcohol and then pour it in my wound. Then take the forceps and dig out the bullet as carefully as you can. Then I need you to cauterize the wound to stop the bleeding and infection. I may pass out so my hand is not an option.”

Lassiter:

“You don’t owe me shit until your dumbass is awake and breathing tomorrow, yeah?” I reply distractedly, moving my hands to follow his instructions. “Side note, push comes to shove, I’m giving you my blood. Y’never know. Could be good for you,” I manage a wry smile as I grabbed the alcohol and poured it over the instruments and the wound.

Then I didn’t have time for smart ass comments or ribbing the male, because fuck me, I was actually close to seeing his ribs. Following V’s instructions, while trying to ignore the sounds of pain and the excessive blood loss of the male, I also tapped into my angel senses. Cause fuck, I needed every advantage I could get right now.

Feeling for the bullet, I carefully withdrew it, breathing shallow as I tossed the metal into a bowl with a solid ‘ting’. Now for the fun part… Shiiiiiiiit.

Grabbing a lighter (thank you, V, for smoking) I ran it under the best tool I could find until the metal was hot enough to leave a scar on even /me/. Then…

“Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorry.”

I pressed the instrument into the male’s chest, against the wound, sealing it.

Vishous: *The white hot pain on my chest was unbearable. I let out a scream that shook the room. And hey whadaya know. It was lights out…*

Lassiter:

The scream ripped at something inside me, my heart pounding in my chest. Worse though was the silence. Vishous passed out seconds before I withdrew the instrument. It took me a second to realise I was breathing hard, my ears ringing with the male’s scream of pain. Setting it down slowly, I watched the miserable burnt hole in his chest, watched for more blood to run free.

When nothing happened, I let out the breath I’d been holding, one hand shaking until I clenched it into a fist and switched to my next task. Dressing the wound.

Whatever gauze and bandages were still clean were applied to the wound and taped. With care I hoisted the male up, wrapping the bandages around his chest and shoulder to keep everything in place. Then I was lowering him back down, checking his breathing, the pulse at his throat. For a minute I stood there, staring down at the male with all the conflict raging in my head and knowing, without question, that if he’d died tonight… I wouldn’t be the same.

Cursing softly, I cleared away the dirty instruments. A little water and the ruined remains of V’s shirt helped me wipe away any blood across his chest and abdomen. Stripping off my coat, I removed whatever ammo and weapons were left and used it as a blanket, covering as much of Vishous’ bulk as I could.

With that done, the male breathing okay and no longer bleeding out, I took several big steps back from the table. Turning away, I dropped into a crouch, running my hands through my hair as I took a shuddering breath in and let it out. Too close.

That had been /way/ too close…

Vishous: *It seemed days had passed when I opened my eyes but that couldn’t be right cuz we were still down in the dark cashe. My chest was hurting like a sonofabitch and my throat was raw and burning. Fuck. I was alive thanks to the angel but now I needed to feed. No females around just the angel. He was sitting at my side watching me as I tried to sit up, he helped me. It was fucking embarrassing being this weak and vulnerable right now. * “Lassiter.” I swallowed hard. “Need blood…”

Lassiter:

When Vishous opened his eyes, relief ran through me I hadn’t been expecting. Helping the normally strong male struggle his way into a sitting position was brutal, but I was just pleased to feel him up and moving under my hands.

“Well, I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but your only source right now is ‘me’,” I mutter, dragging my coat back into place around the male’s waist. His chest was bare other than bandages, and the stark whiteness of them matched the pallor of his skin. “If you’re willing to try my vein… then I’m offering it.”

Presenting my wrist, I eyeballed the male.

“If it’s not your cup of tea, cool, just don’t bite my damn hand off, yeah? N’ once you’re done, lay the fuck back down. You’re too pale for my liking.”

Vishous: *Angel blood was like heroin for vampires. I had tasted him before and almost lost my shit. The high was unlike anything I have ever indulged in. Better than red smoke Phury used to ingest on the reg. But I would die if I didn’t drink from Lassiter. He wasn’t a female vampire so I just had to hope it would work. And I had to keep my fucking hands to myself. I pulled his offered wrist to my mouth and my fangs elongated. Though secretly I would of prefered his jugular vein even though it would be intimate. With a heavy sigh, not trusting myself, I bit down as gently as was possible with a starving vampire. His silver, hot blood poured down my throat. Filling me up, strengthening me. I could feel my body again, no longer cold or numb. The pain in my chest was gone and the high started to hit. My diamond eyes rolled in the back of my head and I tightened my grip on the angels forearm. I didn’t want to let go. And unnatural growling came from my throat. I was in pure ecstasy.* M…i…n…e

Lassiter:

There was a pleasurable pain that came from the bite, enough that had it been at my neck, the male would’ve gotten a whore worthy moan outta me. As it was, I withheld any sound, focusing on the male and what he needed to heal. The growl was a surprise though, and for a vampire that had been dancing on the edge of a reaper’s scythe not long ago, his grip was /strong/.

“Hold up,” I gasped softly, resisting the urge to pull away. “Yours?” A shiver ran up my spine. This was ‘not’ how I’d pictured this going. “V… do you… do you feel any better?”

Cause I was definitely feeling better about this.

Vishous: *It took every ounce of strength I had to pull away from the angel. I stumbled away from the male, tripping over my own feet and slamming into the steel wall furthest away from him. I winced but my body relaxed a fraction from the familiar shock of pain.* Stay….away….

Lassiter:

My hand automatically went to cover the wound on my other wrist as the male launched himself away from me like I was contagious. The flash of pain across his face /hurt/ me to see, and without thinking I dropped my wrist and moved toward him.

“V… you have to calm down. You’ll rip open the still healing wounds you knob,” I managed, throwing in the insult to try and simmer things down.

Even if my heart was racing and I wanted his lips in other places.

Vishous: *I closed my eyes and concentrated hard to fight myself on what the angels blood was doing to my body. It would be dusk soon and we could leave this place. I took a few deep breaths but that made it worse. I could smell him. And he smelled good. Like warm weather and spice. I wanted him. Needed him. I started slamming myself into the wall. The pain allowed me focus and with Lassiter approaching I was very afraid of acting on my emotions. I would never do anything the angel didn’t want. I wasnt that type of male. His blood enhanced my emotions. It took what was lying deep in my core and brought it to the surface. I had never been so fucking afraid.*

Lassiter:

The male slammed himself against the wall repeatedly. My heart ached at the pain he caused himself. The pain my proximity seemed to cause.

Dropping my hands that had been reaching for him, I backed up, till I was halfway across the room again. My shoulders slumped as I lifted my hands again in surrender. Misery settled in my stomach like a lead weight.

“Okay… okay… I’m over here. Stop V. Please… please stop hurting yourself. I’ll stay over here, aight? Just… just stop.”

Vishous: *The angel was smart and backed up giving me some space and room to breath. I stopped kissing the wall and slumped down on the floor. I could feel the blood trickle down my face and drip onto the hard concrete floor. I reached into the pocket of my leathers and pulled out a hand rolled. Putting the tip between my lips I searched for my lighter that I remember Lassiter has used to singe my wound. I could think clearly now and a lot of nicotine would calm my nerves. I looked up at the angel.* Throw me the lighter?

Lassiter:

He stopped nailing himself against the wall, and fuck me wasn’t that a bonus. I could smell the iron tang of blood on the air, but I fought the impulse to go to him again. Wasn’t like I was going to make things any better at this point.

Frowning, I reached into my pocket and drew out the lighter, tossing it the distance for the male to light up and take a deep inhale.

“Did you rip open your wounds?” I managed curtly, glancing down at my wrist and putting a little more energy into healing the bite marks there.

Vishous: *I finished my smoke and immediately lit up another.* Nah im tight. * My head stopped trickling blood and I hadn’t thrown up so no concussion. Yipee. Though passing out again would be welcome. The angel kept an eye on me from afar and as soon as dusk hit I stood up and dragged my ass to the door, calling back to the angel.* You driving? Head injury and all. * His blood high was mostly out of my system but fuck did I want to ride that high again. Me being me. Nope. Not happening. In the car I was too close to the angel. Maybe If I opened the door and just let myself out while he was going 90 on the freeway.*

Lassiter:

Saying nothing, I strode past the male. Thankfully there was already a vehicle in this storage unit, because the one we’d rocked up in was riddled with bullet holes. A doggen could definitely deal with ‘that’ later. Sliding into the drivers side, I jammed the key into the ignition a little harder than necessary. I almost bent the key as I turned it, the engine purring to life as Vishous got in and shut the door.

Beelining it out onto the road, I ignored ninety percent of the road rules, not to mention speed limits, and accelerated back toward the compound. The less time I spent with V in the car? The better. The last thing I needed was the fucker going postal on me again. Not after I’d worked so damn hard to save his goateed life.

“I hope Jane kicks your dumbass,” I mutter, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter, knuckles white.

#Complicated #Part2

#BondedBrothersAU

[koisurufortunecephalopod]

A Comprehensive Guide to DESURABBITS

Hey guys, your friendly cephalopod here to tell you all about the group I’ve fallen in love with! 

(ripping of shades sorry not sorry)

So what is this group?

Formed as DEATHRABBITS (デスラビッツ) in late 2013 when the idol group usa☆usa Shoujou Club (usa☆usa少女倶楽部) of Mochizuki Emi, Okawa Yuzu, and Yasui Karin did a crossover unit featuring the section chief of their indies label G-ANGLE RECORDS and vocalist of the digital hardcore unit AKIRADEATH, Kanzaki Akira. While “Bucho” supplies backing death metal screams and often stands around menacingly in the background, the girls sing and dance like any other idol group. Their style is often described as “Japanese Death Pop”, often compared to BABYMETAL and (OG) LADYBABY with how it has maybe a slight bit of an edge compared to other songs in the idol genre, plus metal influences. 

For the past six years, they’ve evolved their sound in a variety of different ways, trying different styles with their latest released song “Sotsugyou Shoujo- Mirai E” taking on more of a rock influence. They’re one of those groups that tends to just throw stuff at the wall to see what sticks. One of these being “ramen editions” of their singles. Starting in 2016, the singles sold at their live shows are packaged with dry ramen, and purchasing one also sends packets of ramen to disenfranchised areas of Malaysia. Unfortunately as of 2019, this is being discontinued (although the members and staff have expressed interest in replacing this with ramen edition goods). They’ve also changed their name (confusingly) a few times as well-- to Desu.Rabbits (です。ラビッツ) in 2016, and recently to DESURABBITS (デスラビッツ) in February 2019. Either way, most fans affectionately refer to them either as “DesuRabi” or “Rabbits.” 

Also fun fact, Bucho is bffs with Ladybeard because of course those two are friends. They crowdfunded a unit song that’s a collaboration between their groups called “DEADLIFT RABBITS”

Members!

Mochizuki Emi (望月愛実)

Currently 17 and about to start her final year in high school, Emi is the youngest member of the group and was only a sixth grader in elementary school when she joined. Her parents were both involved in the music industry, leading her to become interested in becoming a singer from an early age. She’s the lead vocalist of the group as well as the center of all currently released songs. She’s the one who gets all of the long solo parts and has always had a rather strong voice since she joined.  Emi’s grown up A LOT since the early days (they’ve never posted heights on their profiles, so we’re not sure, but she has guessed that she’s grown about 15cm (~6 inches) and has gotten a much more mature hairstyle. As the baby of the group, in some of their older material, she would often come across as a little spoiled and quick-tempered and compared to that she’s really mellowed out, becoming more mature and cool-headed.  Her English pronunciation is impeccable, but she actually isn’t very good at speaking it in conversation.  Before member colors were abolished in 2019, her image color was pink! She also posts song covers on her personal Youtube channel, but it hasn’t been active for a while. 

Okawa Yuzu (大川柚)

Yuzu is the leader and often the one tasked with leading MCs and acting as the spokesperson of the group. Since joining, her catchphrase has been “Always full of energy,” which is something that describes her well. While she isn’t necessarily a ball of sunshine bouncing off the walls, she has more of an intense “Let’s give 100% to everything” sort of energy to her. She takes her role as leader very seriously; consulting with staff about the direction of the group and recently dying her hair ash pink and requesting that her new costume look “strong and like she can fight in it” in order to really highlight how their new era is about taking a new direction.  Since early childhood, Yuzu has aimed for a career in show business. Originally wanting to be a talent or a broadcaster, she eventually studied dance in order to become an idol. From there she made connections with singer-songwriter and producer of other idols and artists (such as KOTO, Terashima Yufu, and TsubasaFly), SAWA. She is the best dancer in the group, so look for her if there’s a dance break.  Her voice is the deeper one out of the girls, although she doesn’t get as many solo parts as Emi. It was announced recently that she will be getting her first center song as the double A-side with “Sotsugyo Shoujo”, “Demo, Nigenna.” She’s also an avid bookworm and very studious, and will be attending university this spring.  Her member color was previously purple! 

Yasui Karin (安井夏鈴)

Karin is the oldest of the three girls and the mood maker. She’s carefree and my pace beyond my pace. If she actually speaks during an MC (and isn’t just staring off into space the entire time), she will most likely forget what she’s saying halfway through the sentence because she’s always off in “Kariko World” as she calls it. She has a very distinct way of speaking that’s very slowly rhythmic, so she will often get speaking lines in songs (and recently something of a rap verse). Her singing voice is also the most “idol-like” of the three-- high pitched and sweet-- but while she also doesn’t get many solos, it’s very easy to pick out. Also she has such sweet guitar skills. She and Tomo-zo should totally collaborate. Totally. I can’t find much about her background, but I do want to say on a personal note that she was the first member to remember my name and that I was a Bucho oshi after even the first time I saw them. And every time she’s the one taking the cheki, the camera “somehow” doesn’t have any film in it and you two just have to hold that pose for a bit. Karin will also be attending university in the spring and I am so proud of her.  She used to be the green member!

Kanzaki Akira (神崎晃) Bucho (部長)

The 41-year-old section head (or “bucho” in Japanese) at the record label G-ANGLE RECORDS with a background in singing in metal, grindcore, enka, and classical styles who was a vocalist in a handful of metal and rock bands from high school that never went anywhere, Bucho officially emerged in the music world in 2006 with the underground digital hardcore duo AKIRADEATH. As such, Bucho’s role in DESURABBITS is to provide backing death metal vocals (and rap). At 190cm (~6′5′’) with his gas mask and body armor, he can strike an intimidating figure. Despite this, he usually plays the part of a bumbling goofball of an “uncle” figure to the rebellious teenage girls. He himself is a huge idol wotaku (which is really annoying at events when you’re trying to get a two-shot with him and he’s wandered off to get in line for a different idol group. The girls however seem to find it hilarious to yell across the very crowded room for him to get back here because Loren wants to take a cheki with him) and has done video streams talking about the state of the idol industry. While he definitely doesn’t dance (but is incorporated into the choreography sometimes), he does his best in the back to kind of furi-copy or give gestures for the wota-gei if he’s not bumping into things.  As technically a part of the record label staff, there is something of a debate over his status of a member. Since the early days of the group, there was a theme of “Emi, Yuzu, and Karin vs. Bucho,” with even several of their one-man concerts being titled as such and given the caveat of “if tickets sell out, Bucho will be fired.” However, as of their 2019 makeover, it was announced that they will be “graduating” from this image and “allowing” Bucho to be a member.  In the earlier singles, his involvement was a lot larger (often having full verses), but his vocal parts have been scaled down a lot since 2015. Since 2018, he has remedied this by often having a DJ set up behind the girls and DJing live along with their performances (doing some sick mashups while singing, it’s pretty sweet), and their most recent song plays this up. He also does solo DJing as “DJ Bucho.” Not to be confused with “DJ Akira,” which is just what he calls himself when he talks in an “ikemen voice.”  His member color was black!

Okay, so what about their music?

WELL I’M GLAD YOU ASKED. HAVE A COMPREHENSIVE LIST OF MY OPINIONS. 

“Idol STAR WARS”

Their very first song. The girls are at peak baby. Emi is a literal fetus. 

I actually really like the instrumental for this, it has a bit of a gritty electronic edge to it. It sets the precedent for their style of “cute but with a screaming man”, but is a bit more so, because Bucho actually has verses???

The chorus is pure sugar pop though I love it

But what I love more is Bucho just hecking going off with the verbal keysmash screams after the final chorus. Fucking spectacular you funky bastard.

I’m pretty sure they only filmed like seven minutes of video for the music video. I’m not convinced Bucho and the girls were ever in the same building. 

“Hell Near Bucho ~ Ugokisugi da yo Nihonjin 2013 ~”

The B-side off of Idol STAR WARS, so still pretty old form with the line distribution but

Bucho screaming about having a hernia for four minutes

ngl because of the title being partly in English and the album version having a random-ass intro with an American woman talking about Bucho battling an endless battle with the enemy of “hell near” i didn’t actually make the connection for months and thought this was like. DesuRabi Lore. 

OKAY BUT THAT CHORUS IS SO CATCHY AND PEAK IDOL I LOVE IT

And A+ screaming I love it

I really want to see it live at least once because the “Hell! Near! Bucho!” chant part sounds like it would go so hard

“Koisuru Kisetsu”

Second single, getting into their style a bit more

But they still acknowledge that like... Bucho has a name.

I highly recommend checking out the subbed version because the things Bucho is screaming about are just. What.

Literal Rabbits to represent Emi, Yuzu, and Karin

Emi, Yuzu and Karin just being like “The lyrics are kinda dark... Bucho’s singing about his love life again lmao let’s just hecking change this song because we wanna sing something else

Just hecking shove him behind some fake cherry trees. He’ll be fine.

“Omatsuri JAPAN!! Kokuhaku Night”

This is probably their most straight-up idol song. Like you could legit just have this song without him grunting in the background, but why would you want that.

Like that sounds weird by itself but trust me it really pumps up the energy of the song

It’s one of the songs that’s an absolute bop at lives, especially when they shuffle around who does the “Daisuki desu” line. And then we mosh. 

Listen it just has such a great energy that you don’t always get in the “cute summer love song” niche of idol songs and I greatly appreciate this

“DESURABBITS Gun no 7 Kajou”

Another one I highly recommend watching the subbed version for because it outlines the “Seven rules of the DESURABBITS Army”, and is basically the theme song and list of principals for the group and fans. 

Music and MV aside, I want to say that this was one of the things that REALLY sold me on the group, as the rules are all “do your best at your life outside lives, be kind to one another and the live venue” and the fanbase really reflects that. Like they’ve welcomed me more than Gachamen/pinkos which is kind of an accomplishment. 

Like you don’t gotta make your edgy idol group 2edgy4me, you can still be about respecting the fans of other groups and the other fans and just having a good time. 

ANyways

Yuzu: Yeah we have no idea what the fuck Bucho is ever saying

Emi’s vocals in the pv are really great for her age and I wish there were better quality live versions for it recently bc dang she’s improved so much

This is another goes absolutely insane at lives with the “WE! ARE! DESURABBITS! DESU!” chant it’s amazing

I do kinda love the bit where it looks like they’re going to go into a dance break and all they do is... spin. 

Also they call Bucho a mascot character

“Usagi no Kimochi”

Honestly this song is just kind of hilarious once you realize that it’s basically just “don’t talk shit online and come watch our shows”

Complete with Bucho fucking murdering the Twitter bird

They’re starting to change their styles a bit with many tonal shifts and fewer Bucho parts. I’m not personally too into the verses, but I do like the choruses

I really dig the way they go in on the “pyons” at the beginning as well as the piano parts

DJ AKIRA GA KONNICHIWA

“Chuuni no Natsu. Ojisan no Natsu.”

This is a very good summery idol song just in general and mood which I love, with that lovely piano, string, and Emi-solo intro. Very refreshing and nostalgic with a good energy to it. 

THEY LET BUCHO SING!!!! About how much he wants to go to the beach but can’t because he has work just let him go. 

But for real, I really love his singing voice here. It matches well and has a bit of a punk rock sound to it which is my jam outside of idols. Also in the last chorus the way all four of them harmonize is surprisingly nice!

Also as a song that really sums up the relationship between Bucho and Emi, Yuzu, and Karin, it’s hilariously fitting. 

KUSAI, KUSAI!

O-Ji-SA-N!

“Nande?”

First things first the video is amazing like could you guys not shoot on the same day who came up with the story what is going on who believes Bucho could fight ninjas

But honestly that’s kind of the point

ngl this is my favorite DesuRabbi song, because: 

A) HOOKS FOR DAYS. From the “nande naze nande naze nande naze” to the “chikirichi, chikirichi, chikirichi” to the “nande, nee, nande”

B) honestly joining the fandom I was in the mindset where I needed something to express my “why what what the fuck what why what”

and this song supports that that is okay. If you can’t have a happy idol song that is just like “lmao we don’t know what’s going on and that’s fine” idk you’re a stronger person than me I guess??

Also the video

This also really marks the shift into Bucho taking a backseat to the girls, which ye Emi’s voice is clearly getting stronger

But tbh the highlight for me is Karin’s solo at the start of the bridge. Her voice is perfect for the whimsical tone they’re going for at that part of like “hey it doesn’t matter my dude!”

“Shitsuren Shitara Wasabi”

Okay, just gonna be up front, I’m not the biggest fan of their 2016-2018 “です。ラビッツ” era songs. They tried experimenting with songs a lot more with tone changes and different styles, and honestly I just found them lacking the same energy. However, I love this song a lot as it has that with that same “throw a bunch of things at the wall at once”

The tone is a lot more mature than their older material, but you still get the energy, especially in that chorus

The girls are the focus, and even though Emi still has ALL OF THE SOLOS, Yuzu gets some spots too, especially her spoken line which kind of makes this “her song” among her oshis and I’m really happy that she got that since she was the only one who didn’t have that before this

The lyrics are just so hopeful and good??? Idk maybe I’ll translate someday

WASABI WASABI WASABI KURE

“Sotsugyou Shojo-Mirai E-”

Or as I like to call it “When the heck did you guys get a budget???”

This is the first song with a different producer and uh... yeah you can tell. It’s radically different with a darker, rock image, but the lyrics are really hopeful and nice. I translated them over on my jp twitter if you’re interested??

THAT BASS THO

Yuzu’s voice suits this well with her very short solos. I feel like Karin’s solo singing part barely sounds like her, but I do like her little “rap”

And of course Bucho’s rap. What a nerd I love him. 

Seriously where did they get a music video budget

I’m more into their old stuff just because that’s what I like, but I do really appreciate that they went for a harder sound but keeping the hooks and the hopeful outlook and the weird old man who stands behind them

This is most definitely the most intense dance they’ve done. Emi and Karin tried very hard. 

Okay we get it so how do we follow them?

Unfortunately, on one hand, DesuRabi very much are focused on live performances as part of the underground idol tradition. They don’t have a very active release schedule, and while their Youtube channel sometimes posts live videos, it’s a bit sporadic. HOWEVER, they are a group that if you somehow manage to get to Japan, I would HIGHLY recommend checking out, if only for the fact that they have lives almost every weekend which are very cheap and very easy to get tickets to. Unless it’s a larger event or through a different event planner, usually you just reserve under a name and email and pay at the door. The DesuRabi Army is super nice and accepting and I will possibly be there. 

But other than that: uh yeah, social media. 

Official Youtube

Official Website

Twitter (group)

Twitter (Emi)

Twitter (Yuzu)

Twitter (Karin)

Twitter (Bucho)

They’re all fairly active on twitter (although Karin will sometimes just kind of... fade from existence). Emi, Yuzu, and Karin seem to have SOME rules on when they can reply, but Bucho just replies whenever he wants, which is often. Even sometimes when he isn’t tagged in the conversation or following you. They’re always very excited to see foreign fans, so tell them Loren sent you!