The more I sit. The more I let it stew, the more I look back and think about April. I truly realized something, I truly realized no matter what I can never trust the fandom. No matter how "normal" things may seem now, no matter how we can pretend to go back and do our funny shitposting or whatever, there is something I can never shake and it's how I can never truly look at the fandom the same way again.
I can never trust you guys, because when I look back, all I can ever remember is the vitriolic racism you guys spewed towards the two men of color (mainly Steven Lim) and yet let your precious white man off the hook all because he made some "funny" anti capitalist jokes.
I will never ever forget the way you guys made me feel, the extreme rage you projected all because you didn't like what they did. I will never forget how you all ruined something that gave me motivation and the inspiration to create. I will never forget how you ruined an interest that helped me out of a bad mental health space. And I will never forgive you for that either.
I was naive to think back then this community was "safe", that these were creative fans who shared a passion like me. But again, I was naive, I was so naive to think that wasn't I?
Because I had a life lesson alright, I learned that as a biracial girl, to never trust a white fandom.
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Do you ever go insane thinking about how every member of Laios' party is extremely atypical for their species, but a lack of exposure and understanding smoothes out these differences and makes everyone think they're the "typical" representation.
Senshi is terrible with other dwarves since he has no practical interest in mining or weapons craft. We cannot know this until Namari and later, Senshi's backstory are introduced. When we see him interact with dwarves, it's awkward and clear there's a fundamental disconnect.
Chilchuck is incredibly tall for a half foot and as such has to manage his weight more than other half foot dungeoneers so he doesnt set off traps. The first detail takes the changlings to properly understand, the second is referenced in text but is fully explained in additional materials. It is plot relevant that people who don't have the exposure to half foots might not even realize they're their own species.
Marcille as a half elf is kind of obvious to many of the elves who encounter her and they're deeply cruel and assume she's driven by a desire to be able to have children but the party never notices and Senshi especially thinks of her as a typical elf even though in truth she's so outcast she could never dine with her mother at the queens table.
Laios and Falin are a bit more complicated, since we as the audience do have context for most of tallman culture, since it mirrors our own mostly, but both of them have magical aptitude that both people like Marcille, who has a lot of access to mana and people like Chilchuck, who has very little and no magical training, fail to understand how isolating it is to have that much potential and aptitude.
Arguably Toshiro and Namari fall into this as well. Toshiro looks like the embodiment of the silent but noble warrior, but his own party and extra material confirm that he's abnormally shy and introverted, something that makes it hard for him even in his own family. Meanwhile Namari is able to stand on her own as a weapons expert and "typical" dwarf, but total dwarves who are total strangers like Dya know who she is and resent her.
Arguably a lot of dungeon meshi is about peeling back layers and assumptions not working out, but it's so great that every member of the core party gets interpreted by others (and maybe the reader) as "typical", especially with the skills line up, as a human fighter, halfling rogue, and an elven mage are so basic a stereotype. But none of are able to achieve that standard. These assumptions and misunderstandings only thrive because each party member is so inexperienced with both the biology and culture of the others. The only way they gain context is either interacting with a wider pool of people or experiencing it for themself. Everything in this story is so layered and I love it.
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you ever think abt what if you gave a girl your whole life but she didnt even want it? you gave her your life to protect her and she threw you away?? what if even after that you still took care of her the best you could???? and then when you next see her shes not even her???? because you gave her your whole life to save her but you couldnt protect her?????? wouldnt that fuck you up?????? wouldnt that be so painful????????? you ever think about that?????
look at the full size image for better quality:>
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I drew the lady of the hour herself: Alexis Solaire
WHITE EYELASHES MENTIONED!
It looked weird if i didnt add the black.
Taglist:
@achios
@ashertickler
@astrodude-87
@aurorialwolf
@dukecollinsbf
@infinitelovewiithoutfulfilmentt
@moronkyne
@pandoraroid
@plaqying
@porters-fangs
@professionallyyappinabtangst (I showed you this prior)
@puffin-smoke
@skunkox
@starlogician
@sunsickcrab
@themeridian
@tunacatfishes
@vind3miat0r
@www-dot-why-are-you-here-dot-com
@zimix-whispers
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honestly the more i hear about engstars and its TLs the more i absolutely dread the inevitable release of poltergeist and what may ensue from it, bc if if the translators themselves are already invalidating arashis identity then i Really Truly do not want to see how theyll translate natsume and tsumugis microaggressions/transphobia towards her. esp since ive noticed a rise in people being comfortably transphobic towards her, and i REALLY do not wish to see natsume and tsumugi being stupid fucking morons be used as evidence to discredit her
and i think this is all the more reason why its VERY IMPORTANT for engstars to DIRECTLY ACKNOWLEDGE arashi and her gender. bc sometimes characters are STUPID and RUDE and APATHETIC. enstars is a story with NUANCED and FLAWED CHARACTERS, and when a character is being a fucking asshole youre meant to PROVE THEM WRONG. but they dont even acknowledge arashi as a girl themselves. so, if you do use engstars, please keep pressuring them bc omfg this is so bad and i can only see it getting worse
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usually dont post wips here but cant help sharing this pwetty ume..
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