Tumgik
#ill never have the college experience
semercury · 3 months
Text
More than anything I want to go back in time and change how certain things went.
3 notes · View notes
craycraybluejay · 1 month
Text
yes i am an adult male who loves high school dramas this is because i literally never experienced normal coming of age drama like ever and am disconnected from the collective experience of having a relatable peer group forever hope that helps
#i JUST want to experience high school#without like. my whole shitty life thing having gone on#i want to go to high school and have stupid drama and sexuality crises and worries about grades#not... That#i never had that im never going to have that#can i get (one) permission to go a little crazy if i survive into a university#fuck everyone befriend and be-enemy everyone get all up in peoples stupid mind numbingly low stakes drama#i want that sweet golden experience where the worst thing ill ever fear is annoying my classmates#or accidentally spilling something on someone at a dance#i deserve it i deserve to have had a childhood and a young adulthood and a life#i deserve to have dealt with unserious issues to prepare me for bigger ones#rather than serious danger that leaves me permanently severed from normal people and life#and makes me incapable of reacting proportionally or finding it in me to care about less serious problems#like yes it sucks your mom is going to miss college graduation#but i thank my lucky stars that you are not dying or being abused or starved or beaten or exploited#i literally dont know how to take things seriously a lot of the time like im not able to even if i try#because to me the mildest real problem is someone purposefully isolating you and ruining your health#the MILDEST#i try to care ab simple stuff i really do i just CANT#and it sucks so much trying to be a good friend and kind feeling like i cant do enough#the loud thought 'i wish that hapoened to me/i wish i worried about that/i wish the people i love only had that as a problem'#i get so envious. like thank fucking god your parents divorced like normal adults when it should be over#thank fucking god that 'friend' cut you off when they were actively insulting you and betraying your trust#thank the fucking universe that shitty partner dumped you before you fkn hurt yourself over them#yk?#and its a 'mean/cold' way to think about it but i just dont have the capacity to think or feel the little picture#i can imagine my friends subjected to such horror even tho i dont want to
19 notes · View notes
bitegore · 4 months
Text
god i really forgot that every business management professor specifically is the most unpleasant human being alive for no good reason. i have two business classes with like econ and accounting professors respectively and those look fine and then oh my god if i have to go back to this class with this professor i think i might actually kill myself
#red rambles#she's not. *mean*. she is. um. fucking. i think condescendiing is the word#she made us do a kahoot in class on questions we didn't know explicitly because she knew we didn't know them. i hate kahoots#she went through the syllabus like we were children which. fine whatever every professor does that it's why i hate the first class#but she also kept going off topic to give us life advice. never give me life advice ill fucking kill you#im really not sure what else was my fucking problem but i genuinely felt like i was being psychologically tortured#also i have done one of the several assignments for the class already and they're babyshit but its going to be one of my most#busywork heavy classes and she wants us doing discussion questions every fucking week#and i have to download yet another fucking app for her class#and i need it for my degree plan but oh my GOD. i need to get the fuck out of it#im gonna try and find a different session of the class taught by a different professor and switch in#do you know how much i have to hate a class if im willing to eat two entire finished homework assignments to get out of it#eta. i take it with this professor or i take it with a different professor i know and already know i cant stand#who is also going to work us like dogs unlike this prof who is going to apparently treat us like we are 14 years old#i guess its not college if i'm not being forced to experience psychological torment for an hour and a half every couple days lol#ill just have to like eat something before that class and do my best to fortify myself before i go in and turn evil
7 notes · View notes
localdiscountgoth · 1 year
Text
i just started reading “how to bite your neighbor and win a wager” and oh my god im projecting onto vinny so hard. theres never been a character ive related to more and i havnt inhaled a book like this in like 10 years
26 notes · View notes
amethysttribble · 1 month
Text
Next time I’m dealing with an upset kid, I’m going to remember my aunt saying to me, “That fight was the beginning of the end for you and [cousin who a whole airport staff couldn’t unload all my baggage with]” when I was jokingly recounting a spat we had when we were twelve and I called her a ‘motherucking bitch’
Because that flabbergasted me so much I legitimately laughed and I’m still thinking about it.
‘Cause no. Oh my god no. That was the end of the end. That was when I finally said, “I can’t do this anymore.” That was it.
But my aunt couldn’t see that because to her we were just two twelve year olds calling each other names, /oh those two, so ‘close’ (in truth, we were just two girls who were the same age, our moms said we had to be close) but always bickering/ not the continued saga of pain and harassment that had been our shared childhood, twelve years worth, and the moment I was finally old enough to realize, “I should stop trying to be friends and instead never talk to her again.”
‘The beginning of the end’. As if those years when we were younger didn’t count and weren’t informative. They were. As if we didn’t have interiority and a complicated, broken relationship before that. We did. As if it was all petty before we were teenagers. It wasn’t.
It had ended a long time ago.
5 notes · View notes
shxtodxroki · 1 year
Text
God I'm gonna miss this place
3 notes · View notes
vamptastic · 2 days
Text
really weird being out for so long and yet each new group of people i meet assumes that i Just Came Out and thus internally slots me into whatever new age group is now apparently falling for the Transsexual Social Contagion. sorry i still don't pass but ive been out since age 11 and known for longer. brother i am patient zero.
0 notes
butt-puncher · 11 days
Text
I wish that I was more
#sad hours at the huskin bee#personal#graduating soon and the animation department is collecting photos of everyone in the drive#and seeing all these group photos of everyone in the program makes me realize how distant i am from them#and how close knit everyone else has become...#ive never been good at making friends and within like the first few weeks of school it was like everyone got to know each other#and the few friends i made in the program left after the first year#i wish my social anxiety wasnt so bad i tried harder to make friends in college#also i have an essay due on monday and i might just not do it#or itll be really half assed#ive been doing well so far in that class so if i dont do it i think the least id get is a C#idk maybe i can still make friends w these ppl after college somehow but itd still feel weird bc i had a completely different shm experience#than they had#ahhhh#i can imagine a future reunion where ppl will talk to be about old drama that was big among this giant friend group#that consists of most people in my year that ill have no idea what theyre talking abt#bc im never in the loop abt anything ever lol#this actually happened at my hs animation reunion except i actually knew and talked to most ppl in that class#i wasnt like super close to most of them but i had a few closeish friends#and i know one of those friends probably werent/arent in the know#also like i did hear abt relationship drama back in the day bc gossip spread p easily#anyways i was told completely new information abt someone getting stalked back then so thats wild#and apparently there was a super handsome guy in our class that i for some reason have zero recollection of#point is i be the last person to know something and if i know smth then everyone probably already knew#which is annoying. i wanna hear gossip too. even in my own family my sisters will tell each other and our mom about shit that went down w#their friends or our cousins and i only hear abt it when im in the room#so i end up hearing a lot but never directly and sometimes not in full#man i shouldve gone on more college field trips#shouldve done a lot more in life that my insecurities get the way of#tbh i genuinely think i might have a form of undiagnosed anxiety; tism; or some other mental disorder
0 notes
greppelheks · 8 months
Text
mourning again
1 note · View note
rinhaler · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
NOTSCAREDNOTSCAREDNOTSCARED!
✧˖*°࿐ : 18+ only, no minors.    ✧. ┊ frat boy!oliver aiku x f!reader
Genre: college!au (mostly shameless smut tbh) Notes: first fic on my new blog and it's absolutely disgusting, enjoy. Warnings: 18+, noncon, somnophilia, drugging, virgin killer!oliver, implied virgin reader, tit sucking, pussy eating, biting, fingering, marking, love bites ♡, creampie, spit, alcohol consumption, lmk if I missed any!! Words: 5.3k
Tumblr media
What a naïve little thing you are.
That’s the first thing Oliver thinks when he sets his sights on you. A shy, sweet girl wearing the one and only cocktail dress you probably own. It’s so simple but makes a loud statement. You don’t look like the other girls here. You aren’t wearing designer clothes that fit you like a glove, no. The ill-fitting garment you’ve chosen to wear speaks volumes to your innocent nature and your lack of confidence. You don’t have friends, do you? You’re here, alone, in the sleaziest and most prolific fraternity on campus. Of course, it’s a party, and anyone is welcome to attend. But the fact that you decided to come here, alone, makes him think you might be a little stupid.
But that suits him just fine.
He doesn’t approach immediately, for fear of giving the game away too soon. He bides his time and observes your behaviours and mannerisms as you wade through the crowds. His eyes have followed your longing gaze a few times and noticed how you keep looking towards the kitchen. It’s the busiest room in the house right now, he assumes. That’s where the keg and all of the alcohol is.
But almost as soon as you look that way, you avert your eyes and look elsewhere in search of a place to belong. You’ve tried starting a few conversations with the girls, but Oliver knows how catty and mean they can be. Poor thing, fresh meat like you doesn’t stand a chance.
You’re lonely, aren’t you? You’ll feel better with a little company, yeah?
He carefully walks by you in a way that will cause you to spill the drink from your grasp. And with that, this sinful game can begin. The one in which he tells you how sorry he is for causing an accident and ruining your dress. He’s so apologetic that you just can’t help but forgive him right away. And his attractiveness doesn’t go amiss. The kindest person you’ve met thus far just so happens to be so deliciously handsome.
“Let me get you a refill, it’s only fair.” he winks. And you hate yourself because your stomach flits at the casual gesture. It’s probably a line that he uses on all of the girls he meets at parties like this. It’s plain to see that he’s confident. You’re sure there won’t be a shortage of girls throwing themselves at him after a gesture like that.
But you aren’t stupid enough to be the same.
He seems older, by at least two years. He seems comfortable enough here to get you a drink so maybe this is his party. He could have a girlfriend for all you know that is in another room and completely oblivious. You don’t want to make waves before you even experience your first day of class.
People seem friendlier towards you when they notice you with him. Is it genuine? Or could they be laughing at you? His hand resides in the small of your back as he guides you far into the kitchen; until you’re standing between an island counter and the fridge. Your body is warming, and, fuck, he can feel it. You’re so shy. He hasn’t seen a girl like you in a long time. The slightest bit of attention and touching and you’re putty in his hand. What a good girl you are, he’s going to have so much fun with you.
You watch him, carefully, as he rummages through the fridge and grabs a can of beer.
You’re a little deflated as he cracks it for himself and begins to chug.
“I didn’t catch your name.” he states as his unmistakable eyes watch you intently. He has eyes you’ve never seen before, and you’ll have a hard time forgetting. Mismatched purple and green. They’re dull, but not uninteresting by any means. They’re the eyes of a man who always gets what he wants. Those eyes beautiful eyes… they’re bored because they are a prestigious, all access key to gain whatever his heart desires. You hum, hesitating for a moment until you decide you’re too awkward and uncomfortable to hide your name from him. “Oh, that’s a real pretty name. I’m Oliver.” he introduces himself.
“Hey… Oliver.” you smile, unsure of how to respond. You’re so on edge. His peculiar eyes are examining each and every movement you make like you’re being graded. And your heart is pounding… you can’t help yourself. Nobody here has extended so much as a pitying smile. You want to pass his test, he’s the only person being remotely nice to you. But still, there’s a gnawing feeling eating away and corroding your insides and it makes you feel like a criminal, like you’re doing something wrong.
Like you absolutely should not be talking to him right now.
“You’re pretty too.” he smiles, brazenly. His voice is so deep and charming, a sonorous lull as he knows all he needs to do is utter these three simple words to get a girl like you to be completely and utterly captivated. It’s such a pathetic, insipid sentence and you can’t stand that it’s working on you.
You get a full view of his wide, toothy grin and you sense that he’s trying to extend a gesture of trust to you. And you’re encapsulated by it. Pristine pearls almost blinding you and short circuiting your brain as you arrive at the realisation that he might be perfect. His features nothing short of perfection and accentuate his beguiling persona that you can’t get enough of. You haven’t even noticed the way your chest is heaving as you devour a mind-altering cocktail with him as the main ingredient.
And he can’t help but chuckle when he notices how flustered you’ve become from his words, you adorable thing. Three little words are making you squeeze your thighs together and fold your arms over your chest. And don’t think he hasn’t noticed the quickened breaths you’re taking and the dampening forehead you’re suddenly trying to wipe away. He’s noticing everything about you and making mental notes in his mind he will use later.
Do you know how vulnerable you’re being?
You should know better than to be so visibly rattled by him. He may be handsome but he’s hardly screaming upstanding citizen at you. It’s the facial hair. It’s so grotesque and sleazy and wholly unpleasant. And still, the only thought swirling around your tiny, tipsy mind is how it would feel against your skin as you kiss. How would the scruff feel between your inner thighs as he devoured your petalled flesh. You shouldn’t be thinking like this, you aren’t sure what’s wrong with you.
You don’t know how to act, do you?
“Don’t be so nervous, sweetheart.” he tells you, getting closer. The smell of his cologne invading your senses. It’s familiar, it smells expensive and suits him just fine. The type of fragrance you’d save for a special occasion to make an impact and impress people you’re around. Your nostrils flare as you inhale more. More of it. More of him. You need more.
He angles his head as he monitors your response to his proximity. He grins when he notes that you aren’t sure where to put your hands. Moving them a few times before you decide to grip the overhang of the counter behind you until the skin covering your knuckles are taut, turning white. You want to feel his chest, don’t you? It’s so broad and muscular and peaking under his shirt, he doesn’t blame you. You probably haven’t had much experience with a guy like him.
He's more than happy to show you.
You’re starting to think your heart is packing up its belongings and preparing to flee from your own chest as you feel it beating rapidly against your ribs. He’s so intoxicating, you feel lightheaded and overwhelmed by the mere presence of him. His body is trapping yours against the counter. He’s so damn tall, taller than you could have possibly imagined now that he’s pressed against you like this. Your cheeks fill with heat, and you think you might actually faint against him if he doesn’t move away. “There are bad guys at places like this, y’know? Dangerous place to be so pretty.” he warns you, whispering gently in your ear. The tone rushing through your veins and forcing you to shiver. His eyes meet yours after he speaks, his stare willing you to understand what he’s saying.
“T-Thank you…” you mumble.
“Hey, don’t worry so much. I’m the house president, I’ll keep an eye on you.” he assures you, moving away ever so slightly while keeping a lingering hand on your shoulder. A commanding touch to make your body and your mind focus on him. His hand is cold to the touch and you realise it’s from holding the metal can, cold from the refrigerator. The cooling caress of his fingers is polar opposite to the warm smile he’s offering you. You aren’t sure what to do or say, but you need not worry about yourself anymore. He had intended on doing all of your thinking for you tonight, anyway. “Oh, shit, you wanted a drink, right? Let me get one for you.” he speaks, his body moving to act before you can even answer.
“U-Um…” you hesitate, seeing him grab a bottle of rum and a mixer. You hate spirits because they always get you embarrassingly wasted. There are four prominent occasions in the forefront of your mind as you reminisce on the states you’ve found yourself in after drinking spirits. The smell alone is enough to make you gag, but you do all you can to ignore it. You don’t want to make a fool of yourself, you don’t want to do something humiliating that will be talked about for years to come.
You aren’t a prude; you aren’t opposed to getting drunk. You just don’t think it’s a good way to introduce yourself.
He’s moving so fast, and his back is to you as he pours your drink, the red solo cup obscured from your vision as he fills it to the brim for you.
You dumb little thing.
Isn’t this something you’ve been warned about? Not letting your drinks out of your sight at any point, ever. Of course you have, it’s rule number one of going to parties or nightclubs or anywhere that your drink can be tampered with.
You just aren’t thinking straight.
And why would you?
You’re so out of place in this big, intimidating environment. You’re hardly going to suspect the first person to show you a bit of kindness is actually the shadiest guy at the party. But deep down, you know you should consider everyone a suspect after hearing what he had to say. If the guys here are so shady, why does he stick with them? If he’s the president, why doesn’t he tell them to do better?
These few fleeting thoughts have been nothing but. Passing ideas that you thought of and discarded as quickly as they arrived. You can’t live your life in fear or you’ll never make any friends here. And he’s going to all of this trouble for you. You’re nobody to him, and he’s still finding it in his heart to extend a benevolent demeanour to you and making sure you have a drink and a friendly face to keep you company for the night.
So you aren’t going to think twice that he’s slipped something in your drink, you can’t see what he’s doing, but for some reason, you trust him. Would you trust him, still, if he wasn’t so good looking? Would you trust him less if he hadn’t announced he is the fraternity president? He knows you’d never have trusted receiving a drink from him if he just offered it to you out of nowhere.
He’s happy he didn’t have to work too hard, you aren’t completely stupid, but you’re still dumb enough to accept a drink from him like this. You barely even think about it as he flashes you a beaming smile and hands it to you. Hell, it might even loosen you up. You knock half of it back in three seconds and you giggle after the fact.
He’s laughing too.
But it’s at your expense, you poor, sweet thing. You’re going to be seeing so many stars tonight, a sight reserved for Oliver’s favourite angels.
“You’re crazy, huh? You like to party a lot, baby?” he wonders, taking another swig of his drink as he rests against the fridge beside him.
“No, never! This is my first big party.” you confess, and he doesn’t miss the way you slightly cringe at yourself for saying something you must think is a little embarrassing. “I mean, I’ve been to parties… this one is just—”
“You’ll get used to it.” he tells you. “The first one is always memorable, though.”
“Really? How come?” you ask, curiously.
God you’re so cute, it’s killing him. Even he can’t hide the smirk forming on his face as he tries to conceal it with his beer. He decides to not answer. Instead, he admires the way you look disappointed at the prospect of him losing interest in you. He thinks he could bathe in the watery sheen glossing over your eyes as you worry that you’ve said something so stupid that he doesn’t want to talk to you anymore.
He's such a disgustingly vile man. All he can think to do is refuse to put you out of your misery. Instead, he revels in the way you knock back the rest of your drink. The way your eyes widen paints a perfect picture in telling him it was too strong for you. Stronger than anything you’ve ever drank in your life. And that’s without the added ingredient he decided to slip in.
“I— do you have a girlfriend?” your question is abrupt as you wipe the excess liquid from your plump lips. Your watery eyes watching him keenly as you do your best to decipher his intentions.
“No.”
You scoff and shake your head. “I don’t even know why I asked you that, as if you’d tell the truth.” you mumble to yourself, but it’s loud enough for him to hear. And just as you’re about to walk away, he responds.
“I don’t care if you know whether I have a girlfriend or not. I would only care if I was trying to fuck you.” the sentence rolls off his tongue with ease. Like he knew exactly what you were going to say before you even thought of it. And you feel a wave of humiliation crash throughout your body; you feel a current trying to drag you under and suffocate you under the foaming sea.
“Y-You aren’t?” you need to stop talking. You need to stop embarrassing yourself like this. For his benefit. For the other people in the kitchen with you. It feels like everyone is staring at you and laughing at your expense. Maybe you’re just drunk and being paranoid. You should go, you should sprint out of here with whatever small scraps of dignity you have left.
He shakes his head, his hand reaching out to yours to pull you closer to him. It trails, up your side and to your chin as your eyes fixate on his. His thumb smooths over your chin, encouraging you to open your mouth for him. He tilts his can of beer onto your lower lip. The golden, yeasty liquid spills from the metal container and onto your tongue. Your eyes don’t leave his as all you can do is stand there and take it. Your little throat expanding with each glug of the disgustingly bitter drink.
Your body is once again pressed against the counter. He snickers when he feels your body jolt against his as you hear the sound of the beer can he was holding clattering against the tiled floor. And he takes great delight in the way your body melts against his touch as he places a hand on your hip. The other, smoothing the shell of your ear before he levels his mouth with it.
“I don’t need to try, I’m going to fuck you.” he whispers, he kisses against your ear a few times and the sound rushes straight to your clit. You squeeze your thighs together again hoping to alleviate the brewing tension. You pray you were discreet enough for him to not notice.
You weren’t.
And it’s worse as he kisses your neck so openly in front of everyone. He sucks and sucks and sucks until his name is signed in blue and purple blooms against your skin. You bite your lip, internally cursing him for forcing you to have to wear a scarf for the coming weeks until it fades away.
“S-Stop it.” your legs buckle and there is something wrong with your eyes. The room won’t stop spinning. You didn’t drink that much, did you?
“Woah!” Oliver exclaims as you fall into his hold. “You don’t know how to handle your drink, hm? I think you need to sleep it off.”
“T-Tax—”
“No, no. I’d be a terrible host if I made you get a taxi all by yourself. C’mon.” he lifts you with ease, your entire body limp in his arms. And he just can’t believe how lucky he is. How blessed he is to be born so genetically gifted. Because he knows there is no way in hell he’d be getting away with this if he wasn’t attractive. Girls looking at him like he’s some kind of hero coming to your rescue. Him, a hero. It would almost be hilarious if it wasn’t so fucking tragic.
There’s no way you’re forgetting your first frat party.
He’ll make sure of that.
As he passes a few of his brothers on the stairs, they all share a knowing look. Like this isn’t the first time Oliver has been in this predicament. And it surely won’t be the last. He winks at them as he walks by, and he puts you down as he reaches his door, your body dropping like a stone as he lets you fall with no care.
You can do nothing but groan as he drags you by your underarms and into his room. God you want to go home. Not to your student accommodation. Home. You want to be with your parents and under your own roof, sleeping in your own bed. It’s hard to even tell where you are. Are you still in the kitchen? No, there’s no way.
All you can think about is how tired you are.
Suddenly, you’re in the air, being flung onto a nearby bed. You feel like your body doesn’t belong to you. You’re no longer in control and you can’t move your limbs how you want to. You want to use your legs and walk right on out of here and into a taxi.
But you’re lucky, really.
Your body doesn’t belong to you anymore. It’s all his. His to do whatever he wants with. You can’t move, and yet Oliver is going to be kind enough to move you however he likes. Maybe you don’t feel so lucky about it. But you’re just confused right now. Oliver knows you wanted this. Wanted him. The pill in your drink was just a little insurance policy to make sure everyone got what they want.
He prefers girls like this anyway.
Nice ‘n pliant.
“Said I’d take care of you, didn’t I?” he smiles, lecherous hands feeling each and every inch of your body. A curious hand reaching up to touch the fat flesh of one of your tits as he massages it over your tiny little dress. “Think you can wear something like this and expect me not to fuck you?” he whispers.
“Mmmpf…” you hum, there’s still a little defiance in you. At this point, he wouldn’t mind if you were on the cusp of sleep. There’s something so special to him about extracting salacious moans from unconscious bodies.
“’m just getting you out of this little thing… gonna find a comfy t-shirt for you to wear to sleep.” he assures you. He wonders if you believe him. He almost believes himself. But as he pulls down the strapless bust of your dress and your supple flesh is revealed to him, the thought of covering it again dies an instant death in his mind. “Fuuuuuck, gorgeous fuckin’ tits.” he moans, his bulge straining against his jeans as envisions himself sucking them until they’re puckered and raw.
He climbs over you, your tiny frame beneath his domineering one. He’s sure you hadn’t neglected to notice how muscular he is before you passed out, even beneath his clothes. He must be some kind of athlete. He’s too beefy not to be. And boy, does he use his weight and size to his advantage when he’s dealing with delicate things like you.
His head practically falls from his shoulder as he decides to let his fantasy come to life. He licks and laves over your tits individually until he gets a little rougher. Softly nibbling the tender buds until they are aching and so sore. His teeth bruise your flesh as he marks them. An assortment of canines and molars as well as decorative love bites.
Any chance you had of forgetting this party are gone.
You’ll know what happened to you.
You might even remember who did it.
But there’s no way a sweet, timid freshman like you is going to have the courage to tell such an unbelievable tale. You might think there are steps in place to protect innocent things like you. You’re a victim, after all. You need protecting. But once again, that would just be so telling as to how naïve you truly are. Drugging pretty girls at college parties is never going to end. The staff, the students, even the police are never going to side with you.
And why would they? These false statements issued by the board, talks of ‘standing with victims’ and offering a listening ear are nothing but lip service. The institution you have found yourself in will say anything to seem like a worthwhile choice. The right and most beneficial choice to you and your future.
But the harrowing truth is that they don’t have time to protect girls like you when they are too busy covering up the messes of men like him.
He pushes your dress up to your midsection, exposing a pair of white lace panties.
“Awe, for me? You knew you were gonna get lucky tonight, didn’t you?” he asks. But of course, you’re unresponsive. His finger prods at the thin material, an involuntary laugh leaving his lungs as he is greeted with the feeling of your soaked underwear on the pad of his digit. “Too dumb t’speak right now… good job your cunt is telling me how much you want me.”
His thumb circles your clit over the material. And even he’s a little dumbfounded at the way your body betrays you. You squirm and your brows furrow as you try to stave off the pleasurable feeling. But for all he knows, you could be trying to fight him off.
He doesn’t care, though, your pussy already gave your true feelings away.
Even he can’t ignore the way his cock is leaking at the sight of your tight heat becoming exposed as he peels away your panties. A slick string connecting your sex to the material.
You must be a virgin, he thinks. Virgins get wet so easily. He suspected it from the moment he saw you. You’re so awkward and uncomfortable around people, but especially guys. You fumble over your words, and you can’t flirt to save your fucking life. But he didn’t care. The thought of your first time being with him was enough to make him want you. And even if you have fucked before. It doesn’t matter, he doesn’t need to know. The very thought is enough.
He pins your knees to your chest, and he begins to feast on your dripping cunt. You shudder as your body feels the tension building with each suckle and slurp against your clit. It’s unrelenting, he can’t get enough of you. He’s fucking addicted to the taste of your slick and he doesn’t know how he’s gone so long without it. Your left leg ragdolls as he lets go, opting to slip a finger into your unprepared hole without stopping his assault on your swollen clit.
And without hesitation, he’s adding another. He takes his time scissoring you open, and by now he’s convinced you’re a virgin. You’re so fucking tight. There’s no way you’ve had a dick inside of you. Or if you have, it must have been small.
You won’t have to worry about that with him.
Even unconscious, he’s sure you’ll feel how he’s gonna stretch you.
Your lazy groans are like a cheer to him. Your body is telling him what a great job he’s doing. How close you are. How badly you want to cum in his mouth and douse his thick, calloused fingers in your syrupy sheen.
The tip of his tongue lashes over the throbbing button at the apex of your thighs. He doesn’t particularly care if you take him well or not. You’re going to take him regardless. But he isn’t so heartless he won’t try and make it a little less painful for you. He’s urging you to cum for him, his free hand pressing down on your abdomen in a bid to enhance your pleasure. With each whip of his tongue against your clit and every press of your spongy insides with his fingers, he’s trying to drag you over the edge.
Your lifeless body surprises him once more.
He pulls away and observes the way your pussy pulses and your walls tighten around his fingers as you begin to cum for him. Your spent little cunt drooling around his thick digits and coating them in your slick. You even moaned for him. Not loudly, of course. A few tell-tale grunts to let him know you were happy with his work.
His eyes ogle your tits once again, admiring the way your chest rises and falls as he sucks his fingers clean. You’re so fucking cute. You must be heaven sent, the way you stepped into the frat may as well have been a gift with a garish bow from Santa Claus himself.
He unbuckles his belt with one hand whilst squeezing and pinching your nipples once again. They’re so pretty, the prettiest pair of tits he’s ever seen. He’s rock hard in his jeans, leaking like crazy and desperate to be buried to the hilt in your sweet little snatch.
And his heavy cock springs free, the tip leaving evidence of just how desperate he is on his v-neck shirt. Pearly pre shimmering against the black material that is soon to dry and harden and meld with the cotton fibres. But he can’t find it in himself to care. He pulls it over his head and throws it into the corner of his room, he’ll deal with it another time. There’s something much more entertaining lying atop his sheets right now.
“Mmm… think this is gonna hurt sweetheart. But you’re gonna be good ‘n take it f’me, yeah?” he lines himself up with your entrance and gives your still body one final look before breaching your insides with his thick cockhead. “Fuckin’ hell you’re tight. You’re so fucking tight, might cum just from this.” he speaks.
He knows you can’t understand him, but he can’t stop himself from communicating with you anyway. He needs you to know how special you are. That out of all of the girls at the party, he chose you. Don’t you feel special? He’s sure you will when you’re stuffed full of his cum. It’ll all dawn on you tomorrow and you’ll feel so honoured that the one and only Oliver Aiku fucked you open and covered you in so many pretty patterns and was even kind enough to pump you full of his cum.
You have no idea how much restraint he’s showing by not instantly splitting you open on his thick, heavy cock. He can’t help but feel that slowly plunging into your virgin walls is a better display of claiming your body. It’s almost torture for him, easing in inch at a time at an agonising pace.
And when he’s fully sheathed inside your suffocating walls, the pleasure is almost too much, he could shed a tear at the feeling. But, of course, he won’t. He’s prioritising the task at hand.
He holds under your knee and pushes it further into your chest and begins to slowly roll his hips. It’s hypnotising, the way even out of consciousness your eyes can still roll back into your skull. He takes note of how he’s moving when your eyelids begin to flutter.
“Oh baby… right there? Like it when I fuck you there?” he wonders, experimenting with his movement and speeding up ever so slightly. His cockhead is nudging your g-spot so perfectly. It’s so deliciously soft, and those saccharine expressions you’re donning are about to drag him to an early demise.
His grip on your thigh is harsh. Another galaxy of purple bruises forming under his fingers on your doughy skin. He hasn’t noticed. It’s second nature to him to be a little rougher than intended. But it’s part of the fun, right? More little discoveries for you to find in days to come.
He’s entranced by the way his cock vanishes inside of your cute cunt. He’s being swallowed whole by your sticky lips. The sound reverberates throughout the room. The suctioning sounds of you pulling him inside and the tackiness of your pussy and his cock meeting again and again and again.
Your eyes squint as he yanks down your jaw until he sees your tongue. He’s so abhorrent and even at this point he knows this to be the truth himself. He just can’t fucking help it. He wants to do anything and everything to you. He wants to humiliate you because you’re just that special to him. With a cartoonish ‘ptuh’ sound, a glob of spit has landed on your tongue and is slowly sliding down your throat.
With a few more presses of his tip against your sweet spot, you’re spasming around him again. Maybe you liked it after all. You wouldn’t cum if you didn’t. Do you like being taken advantage of by reprehensible scum like Oliver Aiku? Do you like being unconscious while getting your insides pummelled? This might warp your tiny little mind. Maybe you’ll think this is love and this is what you’re meant for. It is, as far as Oliver is concerned. He doesn’t let up humping into your tiny hole. He spits in your mouth again, and it’s the final straw to pull him into his oncoming bliss right along with you.
“Little slut,” he pants, his hips faltering as he feels himself reaching the precipice. “Mine. My little slut. My fuckin’ cunt. H-Hear me? Mine.” he practically growls as he shoots load after load into your unprotected womb. “Ah— fuck. Fuuuuuck—” he finishes, fucking his viscous seed back into you.
He pulls out immediately after, admiring the way his sperm drips and squelches out of your spent cunt. You’re clenching around nothing, poor thing. You must miss him.
But you don’t have to worry. You won’t have to miss him for long. You’re not done, after all. He just needs some time to recharge. He wasn’t just going to fuck you once and be done with you. Not a perfect little pussy like that, no. Those drugs will be in your system for a few hours.
He’s far from done with you yet.
Tumblr media
© 2023 rinitxshi
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
chryblossomjjk · 2 years
Text
practice | jjk
Tumblr media
⇢ PAIRING: fuckboy!jk x inexperienced reader
⇢ RATING/GENRE: m/18+ | college au, fwb, smut
⇢ WC: 8.1k
⇢ WARNINGS: mentions of bad sexual experiences, nickname you guys might find cringey (sorry babes), praise, a little degradation, a little manhandling, oral sex (f recieving), fingering, squirting, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, forced orgasm, very brief mentions of anal play, brief mentions of sex toys and masturbation, spitting, titty sucking, protected sex (hes a hoe but not a dummy), jk is kinda a himbo (scratch that last side note), jk running through twice members lmao sorry girlies, pining, maybe unrequited love, maybe not, ill let u decide, oc is in denial in the beginning, oc has that lemon water coochie!!, daddy kink + daddy kink slander (not seriously!), slight corruption kink
⇢ SUMMARY: you usually spend friday nights on your own. tonight, however, your friend and campus fuckboy, jungkook, decides to pay you a visit.
⇢ NOTES: hi friends!! i’m back with my second fic!! i posted this last night but miss ting had a bad case of the typos rip. so I had it beta'd by @kookstempo pls go give her love >:((( ! i found the smut a little easier to write this time. still not that good lol but not as mentally taxing! oc is totally definitely not a little bit of a projection of me haha thisficwassexuallycathartictowrite i hope you guys like it! i would love to know your thoughts! also would be v cool if you checked out my masterlist. love u bye!!
Tumblr media
⇢ SERIES MASTERLIST
Tumblr media
It’s 10 p.m. on a Friday. 
The night of the week that lures college students out of their suffocating dorm rooms with the promise of parties and alcohol. After days of classes, hours of studying, and minutes of sleep, most people your age spend their weekends unwinding, hopping from frat house to frat house.
One of the many perks of living on campus is the social life. Being surrounded by young adults is exciting. It also means that everyone is horny. Ravenously so. Seriously. Anything with a hole or phallic-shaped appendage is a prime candidate for getting fucked. 
Anything and everyone, except you. 
It wasn’t that you couldn’t get fucked, per se. Although abundant, your options were limited. Given the environment, it was difficult to find a guy you actually felt comfortable with. He didn’t have to be in love with you, but he did have to respect you if he wanted to get anywhere near your sugar walls. With that being said, it was slim pickings.
You coped well, for the most part. But it was hard to shake the lonely feelings that bubbled in your chest from time to time. And the feral ones. Nothing a quick rub from your petite, manicured fingers couldn’t satisfy, you suppose…
Besides, all men do is disappoint you. The only two sexual partners you’ve had thus far were subpar, to say the least. Greedy. Disgusting. Selfish. Not an ounce of concern for your pleasure. As embarrassing as it was to admit, you’ve never orgasmed from sex. Not even close. That left a sour, lemony taste in your mouth. Ever since then, your pussy was on hiatus, locked away in the highest room of the tallest tower, until a worthy knight came to save it from this tortuous dry spell. 
You sigh, peeling the honey-drenched sheet mask off your face and tossing it into the trash with vigor. You eye yourself in the mirror with a scowl. Fluffy, freshly plucked brows knit together as you examine your appearance. You’re wearing a cropped white tank top, nipples poking through the little animated cherubs printed on the front. The baby pink Sailor Moon pajama shorts on your thighs left little to the imagination. White kitty ears headband keeping those annoying baby hairs out of your face. 
You’re cute, right?
Atleast you tried to look cute.
Your roommate, Mina, was visiting family for the weekend, leaving you the dorm to yourself. Without your extraverted lifeline, you decided it was the perfect opportunity to stay in and pamper yourself. 
You’ve already waxed your body, head to toe, with that expensive sugaring wax Mina begged you not to get. ‘It was worth it,’ you thought to yourself when you had spread your peach-scented lotion on the smooth canvas of your legs after the shower.
You even gave yourself a facial. Extractions and all. Much cooler and more productive than partying and getting laid.
You take your headband off, ruffling your thick hair until it falls into place. You reach for your candy-flavored Laneige lip mask, spreading it across your plump pout with your middle finger. Another overpriced purchase.
You exit the bathroom, shuffling towards your twin-sized bed and then falling face first into the plush, ivory duvet. So comfy. It wasn’t even midnight and you were ready to hit the hay. 
You had planned to study a bit before knocking out, but the warm shower left you sleepy. Plus, the past week has been hell. Two papers and an impromptu quiz from your least favorite professor. You were a good student. A great one, even. But you were an overachiever to the core, and still found yourself stressing over assignments you knew you aced.
You let out a small yawn, squinting at the brightness around you. Along the wall beside your bed were vine garlands, embellished with little fairy lights and pink roses. They were such a pain in the ass to put up. It took you and Mina nearly three hours, and a mental breakdown on your behalf, to stick them against the drywall in the right position. High maintenance, but cute, nonetheless. Kinda like you. 
The lights dim as your mind turns hazy, eventually turning into a silent black as sleep clouds your vision. Sweet, blissful sleep. You were teetering into the REM phase when-
Knock. Knock.
The booming noise startles you awake, rattling the brittle wood of your cheaply built door. The wall hangings flutter in its wake. 
Maybe you were being dramatic. The knocks were actually soft and melodic. Almost cheerful as they followed the rhythm of a made-up song. But you were pissed. Even the most heavenly sound would ring demonic and evil in your ears at the moment. 
You shove yourself off of your bed with an exaggerated groan, stomping towards the door and yanking it open, fully prepared to yell at whoever was behind it.
Jeon Jungkook. 
His expression is blank, doe-eyes widening as he takes in your expression. Your body language radiates hostility and violence. The silver barbell glimmers as his thick, dark brows twitch in confusion. He blinks before opening his mouth. “Hey,” he utters hastily. 
Under different circumstances, you would be ecstatic.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Jungkook?” 
“Woah, someone’s cranky,” he laughs hesitantly. “I was bored. Figured you were, too. Mina is gone, right?”
“Are you drunk or something?”
“What- no,” his plump lips form a pout, the matching silver ring on the bottom corner shining as well. 
You sneer at him, pupils darting over his outfit. Oversized gray hoodie, white t-shirt peeking from the unzipped portion at the top. Gray sweatpants. Your gaze lingers on the tight pull of the material in the front. He doesn’t seem drunk, and he isn’t dressed in his usual party attire. 
“I just want to hang out with you. Why are you acting so sus?” 
You roll your eyes, doing everything in your power to exaggerate your irritation. “Why are you here?” 
“Oh, come on, Bambi. Don’t be like that.”
Bambi.
That stupid nickname. 
You and Jungkook had met at a party after you were peer pressured into a game of beer pong. The super boisterous, super attractive stranger ended up being your partner by default. 
"What do you mean you’ve never played before?" He questioned you, voice laced with devastation when he realized you were about to cost him his undefeated streak. 
Despite Jungkook’s best efforts, Mina and her boyfriend, Taehyung, mopped the floor with you. 
"You know what, I like you. You’re a little bitchy but-,” he slurred at the end of the night, helping you gather the discarded solo cups, "Also innocent. Kinda like a baby deer. What the fuck was that movie?"
You answered him curtly with a scowl. 
"Bambi! Right… I can’t wait to ruin you." He was so wasted that night he ended up vomiting off of the second-floor balcony and onto the class president’s Honda Civic. Not drunk enough to forget the awfully humiliating, yet adorable nickname he had bestowed you. 
“Give me one good reason why I should let you in.”
“I have pancakes,” he beams with pride, bunny teeth peeking out. He raises both arms, showing you the crinkled takeout bags in his hands. “Chocolate chip-”
“That’s disgusting,” you scoff. 
“And blueberry,” he retorts with a squint. “Please? I won’t be annoying, I promise.”
You let out a contemplative noise. It wasn’t what you had planned for the night, but you guess company wouldn’t hurt. Especially his company.
If only you could mute your evil brain. 
“I thought you had plans with whatsherface,” you question, stepping aside to let Jungkook enter your room. 
He kicks his slides off at the door, something you’ve drilled into his head with violent words and empty threats. You remember him texting the groupchat a screenshot of his calendar, tonight being marked ‘PUSSY APPOINTMENT’ with the woozy face emoji next to it. The same one that was inked on his middle finger; it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out why. Tonight was one of many slots in his month with the exact same title. That picture was deleted from your phone as soon as you received it. 
“Sana,” he corrects, face unimpressed like he expected you to keep a mental catalog of all his flavors of the week.
You did. Every time a new name was added to the roster, your heart sank. You would never admit it though. 
“I did, but I guess she has a boyfriend now or some shit?” He plops down onto the baby pink area rug beside your bed, immediately digging through the takeout bags. 
“How dare she?” You gasp sarcastically, taking the styrofoam container that he held up for you and sitting criss-cross on your bed.
“I know, right? That’s what I’m saying,” he laughs, opening a syrup packet and pouring it over his pancakes. 
You cringe, foreseeing a sticky, impossible to clean mess all over your floor. “Please don’t fuck up my rug, Jungkook.”
“I won’t,” he mumbles halfheartedly, bringing the pad of his thumb to his mouth. The tip of his tongue pokes out to kitten lick at the sugary liquid before wrapping his plump, pink lips around it.
He sucks gently and then pulls off with a tiny smooch. 
Wow. 
Are you really that far gone? There was no denying that Jungkook was attractive. But were you really that touch starved that you were drooling over every minuscule, minute movement he made? 
“Maybe she was sick of you stringing her along,” you comment, trying to cover up the fact that you were totally just gawking at him.
“Nah,” he murmurs through chubby cheeks, mouth full of pancake. “She knew it was just sex.”
“Did she though? What about Dahyun?”
“Well aware.”
“Jihyo?”
“Yep.”
“Nayeon?”
“Are you slut-shaming me?” He points his plastic fork at you, bringing the opposite hand to his chest in feigned offense. “Because I feel very attacked right now.”
You playfully nudge his shoulder with your thigh-high sock-clad foot, deciding to drop the subject. To be fair, he wasn’t wrong. Jungkook had a reputation on campus. Every girl who involved themselves with him knew what the outcome would be. He was very blunt about his desires and disinterests. Sex being the prior. Commitment being the latter.
But you suppose remaining detached was easier said than done. Something about him was… magnetic. He was bold, yet soft. Obnoxious, but endearing. A sweet talker for sure. And easily the freest person you’ve ever known. Add sex into the equation, and it must be nearly impossible not to fall in love with him…
Hm. That’s enough thinking for the night. 
You need background noise to keep intrusive thoughts at bay. He peeps an ‘I don’t care’ when you ask him what he wants to watch. You take it upon yourself. Sailor Moon it is.
The pancakes keep him preoccupied for a while. You glance down at him every now and then. His eyes sparkle as he watches the cartoon on your phone screen. There’s a little speck of chocolate on the corner of his mouth. His tongue makes an encore appearance, licking it away before fidgeting with his lip. How sinful. 
He starts getting squirmy about halfway through the episode. Antsy hands pull at the strings on the border of the carpet below him. Every now and then he draws a shape and erases it. One of the shapes is a penis, something you’d see on the back of a middle school textbook. 
He scoots with a sigh, pressing his spine against the edge of your bed, and then bending his head back. Fluffy dark strands tickle your legs as he peers up at you. “Can you play with my hair?”
“Why would I do that?” You huff, hot and bothered by the sudden contact.
“It helps me stay still. Please?”
“Oh, um- okay,” you oblige, gulping like you’ve dry swallowed a huge pill. You cautiously card your digits through his hair. It’s so soft and healthy. 
He purrs and closes his eyes. 
He's silent once again, enjoying your touch, even pushing into it a bit. Very cat-like.
That lasts for about three minutes. His inability to not speak every single thought that enters the void of his mind takes over.
‘I just realized they’re all named after planets.’
‘Wait, the moon isn’t a planet, is it?’
‘Why are they dressed so sexy to fight space monsters?’
“Jungkook, shut up!”
“But I’m bored,” he whines. “Is this really how you spend your Friday nights?”
“Excuse me, I’d like to see you take STEM classes for a week and then tell me how you feel,” you contend, leaning over to grab your phone off the nightstand. You don’t miss the way his gaze lingers on your nipples. It makes your palms clammy. “Sometimes, it’s nice to just chill.”
“You don’t masturbate?” He asks calmly as if he had just inquired about the weather. 
You give him an exasperated look.
“What? That’s how I destress,” he continues, shrugging nonchalantly. “Don’t you have a vibrator?”
“I- no! Why are you asking all these questions?” You shriek, absolutely mortified.
“What do you mean ‘no’?” He lifts his head off of your lap, craning his neck so you can see his appalled expression, your answer leaving him equally as mortified. “Damn, that’s wild,” he tuts in disapproval.
“I would rather not have to smuggle a sex toy into my dorm room, Jungkook,” you retort.
“You can borrow mine,” he smirks, turning his body to face you, obviously relishing in the reactions he’s pulling out of you. “It’s a Hitachi. It’s really strong too, like, most girls don’t even last five minutes.” 
“Why do you have- you know what, nevermind actually!” You clench your eyes shut, poking your fingers into your ears and shaking your head dramatically. Your reaction is mostly out of embarrassment and partly because the thought of him pleasing women who aren’t you hurts for whatever reason. “I’m done with this discussion!”
“Seriously?” He wheezes, thoroughly enjoying your tantrum. He wraps his long, nimble fingers around your wrists, pulling your hands away. Your skin burns under the touch. “I want to get to know you more.”
“Yeah, but you don’t need to know-,” you rip out of his grasp, flailing your hands around in circular motions, “-those things.”
“I’m just trying to make conversation,” he frowns. 
“About?”
“Anything.”
“Okay, um...” you look around the room nervously, searching for the right thing to say. “What’s your favorite color?”
“Black. What’s your favorite position?”
“Jungkook!”
“I think missionary is my favorite. Very underrated,” he says, tapping his chin like it’s an answer only an intellectual would’ve given. “The kind where her legs are pushed alllll the way back,” he emphasizes the ‘all’ by balling his hands into fists and lifting them up by his head, showing you exactly where he likes them. “You hit the g-spot perfectly that way.”
You level him with a scowl, crossing your arms over your chest. Unamusement written all over. 
“Why are you so mad?” He laughs. “What? You’re embarrassed to talk about sex?” 
A pause. 
“You’re not a virgin, are you?”
“Jungkook, no…” you sigh, rubbing your temples in frustration. “I’m just not like you, okay? I don’t like sex as much as you and everybody else on this fucking campus does!”
He hesitates for a moment as he processes your sudden outburst. The first time you’ve ever seen him rendered speechless. You can picture the cogs turning in that thick skull of his. 
He inhales sharply, eyebrows raising up to his hairline as if something clicked. His tongue pokes at the inside of his cheek, cute dimple peeping out from the pull. His head drops as he huffs out a laugh.
“What’s so funny, Jeon?”
“Ah, I see now.”
“See what?” You groan, bothered by his vagueness. 
“Here's what I think, Bambi,” he mumbles in a low tone, sitting up from his spot on the floor so his gaze is aligned with yours. His palms are on either of your crossed legs, fingers curling into your white blanket. Forcing you to make eye contact with him- his pupils are black, nothing like the soft brown you’re accustomed to. “You’re so uptight because you haven’t had sex in a while- good sex, at least.”
Your breath catches in your throat. You say nothing.
“The guys you fuck don’t know how to treat you, am I right? They can’t make you cum?”
Crickets.
Your lack of response tells him the answer.
When you do speak, your words come out shaky. “Well, what makes you any different?” 
He shuffles closer, knocking his forehead right against yours, invading your space. He’s so close that you feel claustrophobic. Your heart pounds in your chest.
“I always make the girl cum.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm,” he hums through curled lips as he nods, silver hoops swaying at the motion, nose brushing against yours. “More than once.”
His dilated pupils scan over your body, pausing at your chest for a moment, and then continuing their descent. A hand slides up your bare thigh, the warm touch leaving goosebumps in its wake. He grabs the hem of your shorts between his index and middle fingers, tugging gently. “These are cute.” He licks his lips, making them pink and glossy, like he’s ready to eat you. “I’d like them better somewhere else though.”
“Jungkook…”
And then he's kissing you. 
It’s soft, like he’s afraid to scare you away by putting too much pressure into it. Little does he know you’ve been thinking about this for a while.
All your protesting and fighting up until this point was futile. Your hands unconsciously make their way to his cheeks. You swear you feel him smirking. It’s like he can read your mind, knowing exactly how bad you’ve wanted this.
He prods his tongue against your bottom lip, urging you to let him in. You do. He wraps an arm around your waist and guides you down, hovering over you.
“You taste like candy,” he whispers against your lips, hot and needy. Take that, Mina. A sneaky hand cups you through your shorts, right where he knows your clit is. The thin material does nothing to conceal how wet you are. “Do you taste like candy here too? Can I try?”
You’re anxious, but you can’t stop. Not when he’s so enticing. Not when the rumors of his sexual prowess are swimming around in your mind. Jungkook could ask anything of you and you’d gladly obey. You give him a small nod. 
“Don’t be nervous,” he teases through an airy laugh, breath fanning across your face. It smells like chocolate and syrup. He turns his head and presses a gentle kiss on your fingertips. You swoon.
Hooking his thumbs into the sides of your shorts, he pulls them below your butt. He dips his head down, biting into the side of your thigh. A predator sinking its teeth into its prey. Not hard enough to hurt. It’s just enough to rip a whine from you. “Fuck,” he grumbles, pulling your shorts completely off. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this.”
He’s been wanting this, too?
“Let’s leave these on though,” he sighs, speaking in reference to your socks. It was something you knew he found sexy, overhearing a graphic conversation with Taehyung about kinks and other filthy things. That may or may not have been the motivation behind your purchase.
You cringe. Being naked in front of someone for the first time in a long time was nerve-wracking. 
“No panties?” Jungkook asks, looking at you quizzically. “Dressed so skimpy, Bambi. All for me?”
“I didn’t know you were gonna show up...”
“Oh shit, you’re right,” he chuckles, caressing your legs with his large thumbs. You appreciate the gesture. 
Cool air brushes against your exposed core when he parts your thighs. His gaze locks onto your dripping center. You whine and cross your arms over your face. Maybe if you squeeze hard enough you’ll revert back into yourself and escape this dreadfully vulnerable feeling.
“I’m sorry, it’s just…” he starts, words dying out because his attention is elsewhere. Jungkook has seen a lot of pussy throughout his life, but yours has got to be the, “prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen. So fucking wet.” He settles back onto his knees, hooking his limbs around your thighs and pulling you to the edge of the bed. 
Jungkook watches in awe as he spreads your lips open with his thumb and index fingers, stealing a peek at your shiny center. He takes a long, languid lick from your pussy to your clit. He moans when the wet muscle dips between your folds, eyes scrunching as his feature contorts into a scowl. You recognize that face. That angry face he makes when he tastes something he finds incredibly yummy. It’s the same one he made when he ate his pancakes. 
Have you really studied him so much that you’ve picked up on his subtle habits? Nevertheless, the fact that he actually seemed to be enjoying going down on you was jarring. You’ve never experienced this before. It felt so fucking good. You were already close and he has barely touched you. You let out a whimper.
“Mm, you’re so responsive,” he notes, absolutely loving the little sounds you’re peeping. Much different than the blaring moans and screams he is used to. Despite the ego boost they give him, your shy whimpers are a welcomed change. Each one makes his cock twitch, forcing him to bring a hand down, palming himself through his sweats. “When’s the last time someone ate you out?”
“Never…”
“I don’t see why not,” he coos sympathetically, shaking his head in disapproval. He gives you another lick, tongue pressed flat against you. “You taste like lemonade, so sweet.” 
That had you absolutely drenched.
You move up onto your elbows, watching as he throws your legs over his broad shoulders. He licks the pad of his thumb, this time actually sinful. He presses it right to your bud, rubbing it before pulling the sensitive skin taut, lifting the hood and exposing your clit. 
He tuts his tongue, whispering something so quietly you barely catch it, only making out a breathy iteration of the word ‘tiny’. Heavy eyes flicker up to yours as he places two soft pecks on it, then blows delicately.
“Jungkook, please…”
“Sorry,” he chuckles, “I won’t tease-,” sentiment interrupted with an open-mouthed kiss, “I know how bad you must want it.” 
He circles the tip of his tongue on your clit before suctioning his lips around it. You gnaw onto your lower lip, face twisting up in pleasure.
This is easily a far better form of self care than what you had planned. 
It’s obvious that this is something Jungkook does a lot. He is a photography major, and has never struck you as someone who is incredibly bright, but the way he touched is strategic. He has spent the better part of the past decade perfecting his craft, studying the way women move their bodies when he applies a certain amount of pressure. The beautiful noises they make when he stimulates them in certain spots. He has the exact equation to make you fall apart.
There is a pattern to it. He latches onto your swollen nub, cheeks hollowing with a few harsh sucks, before licking over it, letting his tongue dip into your entrance. You can’t help the subtle thrusts into his mouth with every glide of his tongue. The consistency had your stomach doing somersaults.
He sinks further down, lapping at your folds, never straying too far from your clit, burying himself so deep into your pussy that the tip of his nose nudges against it. A big palm slides up your torso, reaching under your tank top to grab at your chest, thumb flicking over your hardened nipple.
“Jung- fuck!” You croak, high-pitched and desperate. “I’m close.”
You expect him to pull away. He, instead, acknowledges you with an ‘mhm’, nuzzling even further into your cunt. 
You can’t help the instinctual, or more so learned, shame bubbling in your stomach. Your hips jerk away. Legs close tight around his head, attempting to save him from the brunt of your orgasm. He simply pries them back open, nails digging into your inner thigh. You grasp onto his hair, tugging it back as you curse under your breath.
He doesn’t like that.
He pops off of your clit with a sharp, annoyed growl. “Can you stop?” The stern edge in his voice makes you flinch, releasing your grip immediately. “You don’t have to control every situation. Just relax.” 
“I’m sorry,” you squeak.
His gaze softens immediately. He didn’t want you to apologize and he definitely didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. “You can touch me, Bambi,” he grabs your hands and places them back on his head, encouraging them to tangle in his tresses once again. “Keep me here, though. Wanna make you cum in my mouth.”
It’s strange, being pampered during sex. Taken care of. 
You peer down at him. His mouth and cheeks are dewy, covered in your arousal. Even the tip of his nose is wet. He’s not uncomfortable in the slightest. 
You push him down, giving him the green light to continue. The descent is quick. Starting in your stomach before it shoots through the rest of your body. You throw your head back, teeth digging into your lip as you desperately try to stifle the lewd moans threatening to escape.
Jungkook guides you through it, slowing down towards the tail end of your orgasm. He pulls away with a satisfied hum, standing up from his spot on the floor. “Taste?” He asks, squishing your cheeks with his big hand. His tongue licks right against yours when you stick it out, lips closing into a sloppy kiss. “Good, right?”
You don’t really taste anything, but you nod anyway. Maybe a slight hint of citrus. Or maybe you were delirious after the best orgasm of your life. The only partnered orgasm of your life.
His eyes are scrunched, but you can still see the stars in his dark pupils as he smiles down at you. You mirror him with the opposite expression, irises wide and blown out. He giggles, nuzzling into the side of your face and then nipping at your cheek. “You’re like a space girl,” your heart melts at the Sailor Moon reference. “So clueless. I wanna do everything to you. Teach you everything.”
“Like what?” 
“Have you ever squirted before?” 
You freeze. “No… I don’t think everyone can.”
“That’s not true. Everyone can squirt with a good partner and the right mindset,” he proclaims enthusiastically, shooting you a thumbs up. The tent in his pants on full display.
“Right mindset?” You giggle, raising a brow at him. 
“Yeah, it’s pretty intense.” He grabs a half-empty water bottle, your water bottle, off the nightstand, taking a big sip. “I can get you there,” he states, a droplet of water dripping down his chin. “You have to listen to me, though. You can continue your ‘girlboss’ bullshit after I’m done with you.”
You roll your eyes. If any other man said that to you, you would be livid. You would literally rain hellfire upon them. But it’s Jungkook. You know he’s joking, and the soft spot you have for him prevents you from ripping him a new one. 
He smiles when you agree, pecking your cheek before unzipping his hoodie and shrugging it off his shoulders. You watch his muscles work. Toned, firm biceps exposed for your viewing pleasures. He recently recolored the tattoos on his right arm. 
You remember him venting about his parents’ disapproval of them, and his major, when he walked you to your dorm after a party a few weeks ago. It was the only time you’ve ever seen the fun-loving, jovial man feel melancholic. You coin that night the night you developed... whatever it was that you have for him now.
“Alright,” he gestures to the cotton sweater, now spread out on your bed. “Lay here.”
“Why?”
“I mean…” he looks at you like you’re stupid. “You don’t want to get this wet, right?” He counters, pinching your blanket.
Cockiness just oozes out of him. It makes wetness ooze out of you. 
You comply, laying down on the soft material. It’s warm and smells like the delicate linen cologne he normally wears. You bask in the scent.
“I usually use lube for this, but…” he clicks his tongue, knowing you don’t have any. “We can make it work.” Leaning down, he lets a string of spit land on your clit. It tickles as it trickles down your folds. He’s quick to collect it with his fingertips, smearing the moisture all over.
“Take your top off, please. I wanna see those pretty tits.”
It’s barely a top. The jagged, raw hem only conceals half of your perked nipples. How ironic is it that you’re wearing an angel print tank while being absolutely defiled. You sit up, taking it off easily and tossing it on the floor before laying back down. 
“It’s not going to hurt, is it?” You wonder, reflecting on his earlier statements.
“Why, you nervous?” He teases with a lopsided grin. It drops when he sees the apprehensive look on your face. “It shouldn’t hurt, but if it does you’ll tell me, right?”
“Right,” you moan, another drop of saliva hitting your pussy. 
“Hold your legs up, keep them open,” he orders, sucking back the extra spit with a hiss.
Pink nails curl under your thighs, bringing them up to your chest just as Jungkook instructed. He pops his middle and ring fingers into his mouth, bringing them down to tease at your entrance before slipping in, palm facing up.
There’s an adjustment period, his fingers being much bigger than your own. You’re so aroused that the tenderness subsides quickly. “Fuck,” you yelp when he starts gently petting at your g-spot.
He doesn’t jam his fingers into you carelessly, an unpleasant sensation you’ve been subjected to in the past. His digits never leave you. Instead, they move in a sensual curl that makes you purr. Every touch is focused, intricately placed on that delicious spot.
“Pussy so wet,” his voice comes out as strained as his pants. He sounds so turned on and filled with lust. It makes you clamp around his fingers. He lets out the tiniest moan, using his free hand to grab yours, sucking three fingers into his mouth. “Touch your clit for me.”
You bring your hand down, rubbing side to side. “Uh-uh, circles.” 
Immediately, you follow his command. You look so delicious he can’t help himself, bending at the waist to latch onto one of your nipples.
“Please, Jungkook, more…”
“Yeah?” He mumbles against your chest, sending vibrations through the sensitive skin. You nod frantically. “I usually don’t give in this easily, but I think you deserve it. Been such a good girl. You can have more, Bambi.” You know it’s just sex talk. A stream of consciousness fueled by his horniness. All the blood leaving his head to fill his cock, making him more dumb than usual, but you can’t help but feel special. 
“It’s going to build up fast, okay?”
You mumble a small ‘mhm’. How bad can it really be?
Jungkook starts moving his hand rapidly, fingers thrashing up and down. There's so much force behind his movements that your hips lift and dip. 
You’re overwhelmed. Constant, vigorous stimulation right to your g-spot. A strange swelling feeling starts pooling in your lower stomach. High-pitched whimpery moans and wet squelching noises fill the room.
“J- daddy, fuck!” It is so intense you can’t form a coherent sentence. There’s faint laughter in the background. “No, no, no…” you plead, wrapping your hand around his wrist, nails digging into his skin. It’s too good. So good that it made you scared.
His movements halt. “Am I hurting you?”
“No, too much… fuck!” You shout when he continues at the same intensity, your body thrashing wildly. You feel out of control.
“Shh,” he whispers softly. “You can take it. Just let it happen.”
You inhale sharply, doing your best to calm down. It’s difficult when he keeps touching you like that. Your fingers curl into his sweater, bracing yourself. As soon as you stop fighting that full feeling, as soon as you loosen the tense muscles, it’s going to hit you.
You relax and a wave of the most intense pleasure you’ve ever felt ripples over you.
There’s an intense, world-shattering, euphoric release.
And then nothing. 
Your head is empty. Your ears ring. Your vision is distorted by white splotches. 
Complete solace.
Your senses come back after a few minutes of heavy breathing. It’s fuzzy, but you can see the ceiling fan swirling above you.
There’s a metallic taste on your tongue. 
You can feel droplets trickling down your inner thighs, a damp puddle under your butt, and a warm set of lips on your temple.
“Welcome back to planet Earth,” Jungkook jokes, pushing away the wispy flyaways that stick to your forehead. You blink absently as you slowly make out his features. You swear there’s a glowing aura around him. “You good?” 
“So good,” you confirm halfheartedly. “You’re so good.”
“You came so much,” he hums in satisfaction, placing a few pecks against your jaw. Jungkook was actually surprised at how much wetness he coaxed out of you. You just kept on cumming. The prettiest waterfall he’s ever seen. Damp fingers brush up and down your bicep, a comforting gesture. “You called me daddy.”
“Shut up,” you groan, covering your face. “Don’t talk about it.”
“I won’t, it was fucking gross,” he laughs, smiling down at you so genuinely that it reaches his eyes. This was just a hookup, you assume, but he’s just so pretty. You can’t stop yourself from pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. He reciprocates. It feels so intimate. Too intimate for a pair of friends. You’re so tired but you want more. Everything.
“Take this off, please,” you ball the white fabric of his shirt into your tiny fists, mimicking his words from earlier. “Let me see those pretty tits.”
He quirks a brow at you, standing up straight and pulling his shirt off by the collar. It’s discarded onto the floor, with all the other useless, bothersome items.
His tits are pretty. Chest flushed red from exertion, nipples spiked and tiny. His body is fit, but not overly muscular. Lean and toned. Just what you like.
You snake your legs around his cinched waist, constricting his pelvis flush against yours. 
“Is it my turn now?” He says, loving your sudden burst of confidence. His jaw goes slack when you start grinding on his clothed cock. There’s a slick spot where your bodies meet, heather gray turning dark as the fabric dampens. Jungkook lets you play with him for a bit, rutting against you until he physically cannot stand it anymore. “I’ve never wanted to fuck someone so bad.”
“Then do it,” you whimper, growing impatient. He sighs, hand coming down to fiddle with the sweater underneath you. You crane your neck, watching curiously as he pulls a square packet out of the pocket. 
There’s a sharp pain in your chest when you see it. “Did you plan on us hooking up?”
“Maybe,” he contends playfully. All the amusement in his face disappears when he flicks his bangs back and sees yours. Hurt and disappointed. “I always keep condoms on me, you know that,” he explains, voice soft and wary. 
It makes sense. He was sexually active. Very much so.
That scares you. You could possibly be just another girl he’s sexually active with. A last ditch effort to get laid because the first option bailed. The puzzle pieces start coming together.
You look him in the eyes. His pupils are brown again. They look pleading, concerned for your wellbeing. Afraid they’ve tarnished something so delicate. You can’t tell if it’s just your delusions, post-orgasm bliss. All you know is you never want him to stop looking at you the way he is right now.
“Can I put it on?” You ask, pointing at the condom in his hand, desperate to break the tension.
“I- sure,” he retorts, exhaling deeply like he was holding his breath, relieved. He gives it to you, using his other hand to pull his pants by the waistband, stopping mid-thigh. Too rushed and eager to take them off completely. 
He didn’t have underwear on either.
You squint, trying to read the white font on the packet. Large.
You glance up, eyes bulging out of your skull when they land on his cock. It’s big. So aroused that it points straight up, resting on his abdomen. The tip is bright pink, standing out against the background of his smooth milky pelvis. It’s shiny with precum, a little bead sitting right at the slight. Your gaze trails up the veiny underside, following the acute upward curve. You gulp.
“You good?”
“Yeah,” you say, jittery hands tearing open the foil packet. You cautiously wrap your hand around the shaft. It’s so firm. Rock solid and touch starved. It jumps in your palm as you slip the sticky rubber down, making sure to stroke him along the way. “Big, thas’ all.”
He nods, the corner of his lips pulling up in a smirk. He can tell your words are equally as worried as they are complimentative, though. “I’ll be gentle,” he promises, holding on to your ankle to lift your leg, kissing it through your white sock. Gaze locked on you, making sure you’re watching and that you know he can be soft with you.
He bends both of your knees up to your chest, tapping your outer thigh, indicating he wants you to hold them again. Tattooed knuckles wrap around the base of his cock, laying it flat against your pelvis. “Fuck,” he mutters under his breath when he sees the tip reaches just below your belly button, knowing exactly what to envision when he’s inside you. His cock so deep it’s in your stomach.
He smacks the shaft between your folds. Filthy, wet slapping noises overpower your coos and purrs. The tip tickles your entrance, rubbing up and down your folds, before he brings it to your abused clit again, flicking it up and down like a light switch. Watching your face intently to gauge your reaction, looking for any prick of discomfort. 
“Put it in,” you frown, growing impatient.
“So needy,” Jungkook teases, gripping his cock right under the crown and pushing in. Only the tip. He uses his fingers as a buffer, trying not to give too much too fast. Pulling back agonizingly slow and then diving back in, giving you a little bit more length this time. It was only an inch or so, but the stretch burned. You catch your bottom lip between your teeth, trying to hold back the tears that are threatening to spill.
He repeats this process, working you open little by little until he’s buried to the hilt. He lets out a pained grunt, overwhelmed by the way your warm wet walls just suffocate him. “Fuck, tightest pussy ever.”
You clench your eyes shut, trying to ease the feeling of getting impaled. Jungkook is so big. The veins that run along his shaft, the thickness, the curve. He leans down and pecks your nose sweetly. His thumb, rubbing tight circles against your clit, provides a decent distraction. You focus on the pleasure instead of the pain.
“Feel okay, Bambi?” He coos, feeling you relax under him. “Can I move?”
With furrowed brows, he pulls out a few inches before thrusting back in slowly. Heavy eyes glued on the way your lips petal around him when he gives you more. The way they resist when takes his cock away. “Good girl,” he praises, voice raspy as he tries his best to maintain a slow, shallow pace. “You take it so well.”
Any pang of discomfort is gone. He prepped you so well that there’s no friction, just seamless glides in and out of your leaking cunt. The upturned tip of his cock tickles that sweet spot in you. You moan, digging your almond-shaped nails into your thighs, arching your back for more.
Jungkook sees your body language. He knows what to do in this situation. One of the most useful sex tips he’s ever learned. He leans forward, pressing his chest against yours, swollen lips latching onto your neck. They suck a sore spot that his tongue quickly soothes over. “Hold on to me,” he commands, wet pout smushed to your skin. 
You let go of your thighs, leaving little crescent indents on the surface, and throw your arms around his shoulders. Hooking your knees into the bend of his elbows, Jungkook hoists you up effortlessly, supporting your weight with his large palms on your ass. The change in position spreads you even further, slides him in even deeper.
“Mmm, f-,” you moan, words cut short when he starts bouncing you up and down on his cock.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!”
“Mmm, I knew it,” he chuckles sadistically, right into your ear. “I knew you were just waiting to be ruined. So fucking high-strung and- fuck!” He can feel your arousal dripping down to his balls. “Controlling.”
Arguing is pointless. You swear he's in your head, the tip of his cock scrambling your brain around so that you can’t even think straight. All you can think about is him.
You cling to him, resting your cheek against his shoulder as he lifts you in the air. Letting him have his way with you. You’re never felt more alive. 
‘Orgasms are the pinnacle of the human experience,’ you recall Jungkook telling you one day at the library. At the time, you rolled your eyes. Now, you know exactly what he meant. 
“You just needed some dick, huh? My dick?” You nod, drooling against his skin. “Doesn’t it feel good to let go?” All you can get out is a little moan.
A glint flickers in the corner of your eye. Mina’s mirror. It’s leaning against the wall right in front of you. You can see the expanse of his back. The taut skin on his shoulder blades. Biceps bulging as he moves you. His pants slid down to his knees, so you can see his cute butt dimpling when he thrusts up. Muscles working to make you cum.
“Okay,” he huffs, more to himself than you. Your pussy was so good that it derailed his original plan. Jungkook tosses you up a little, getting a more secure hold as he wraps an arm around your waist. The motion makes his cock slip out, the loss of contact makes you whine.
His free hand tosses his soiled hoodie out of the way. You cringe, making a mental note to mop tomorrow morning.
He places one of your fancy, cooling-gel pillows on the edge of the bed, laying you down on top of it. Your hips are elevated, tilted upwards. Giving him a clear view of your glowy core. He catches a glimpse of the only place he hasn’t destroyed.
“What about this?” He coos, pressing the pad of his thumb right against your clenching hole.
You squeak, shaking your head. Baby steps.
“Alright,” he chuckles, hand retreating promptly. “Maybe next time.”
He wants to do this again. Your heart flutters.
You watch as he guides himself back in, stuffing you to the brim in one swift motion. Much less cautious than earlier. His cock hits your g-spot perfectly. The pillow and his curve doing wonders. Your eyes roll back as your head hits the bed. “Like that, right?” He laughs, snapping into you. 
“Yeah, Jungkook,” you moan out, gripping your ankles and bringing them up by your head, just how he likes. “Don’t stop.”
He could’ve busted right then and there. 
“Fuck, keep saying my name,” he groans, eyes glancing up to your perky tits, jiggling freely with every snap of his hips. His pupils sneak down further, watching his cock plow into your tight, wet cunt, leaving it dewy.
You call his name like a metronome, ‘Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook’. Voice airy, following the rhythm of his hips. It makes him move harder and faster, feeling that familiar pooling at the base of his shaft.
Just like everything about him, his strokes are fluid. His hips aren’t locked and stiff. They move in a dip and roll that makes your toes curl. His pelvis mushes against your clit when he thrusts all the way in, balls smacking against the curve of your ass. It feels delicious. Your third orgasm of the night is approaching fast.
“You cumming, Bambi?” He hums, already recognizing the way your thick brows pull together when you're close. The way your hips rut a little, naturally guiding you to your orgasm.
“Mhm, make me cum Jungkook,” you mewl.
He hovers over you, placing his hands on top of yours, bending your legs back farther. Taking long, violent plunges into you. So close to a piledriver. He’s basically fucking you into the mattress, bed frame cracking against the wall beside it. One of your vine garlands falls down, but you’re so close you can’t even bring yourself to care. 
Your climaxes blend together. You first, clenching and unclenching around his length. Moans coming out sporadic and your shoulders off the bed. Legs trembling in his hands.
His orgasm is stunning. 
“Ah- fuck. I’m cumming,” he croaks through snarled teeth, head dropping to watch where you connect. Something he does often, you notice. He doesn’t stop, even after he spills into the condom, fucking you until he’s completely drained. You whimper, sensitive from the overstimulation. 
“Damn,” Jungkook huffs out a laugh, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. You fist the wavy strands at the back of his head, a little damp. 
“Thank you,” you speak shyly.
“I know you’re new to this,” he lifts up and looks at you quizzically, amusement tickling his features, “But that’s kinda a weird thing to say after someone fucks you.”
You laugh with him, eyes darting over his face. He has a small scar on his cheek, something you’ve never noticed before. 
“No, I just mean-” you cringe when he pulls out of you, feeling empty. “You’re the only guy who’s ever… I don’t know. You’re just different.”
He smiles with twinkling eyes, tying a knot at the end of the condom and tossing it into the pink trash can beside your nightstand. “You’re different, too,” he mirrors, plopping down onto the bed next to you. “Special.”
Special.
You sigh into his lips when he gives you a soft peck, thumb brushing against the newfound mark of his face. “I’m sorry that I made you do all the work.”
“Nah, don’t worry. Making you feel good makes me feel good.” His words are sweet but there’s a naughty glint in his eyes. “Besides, you can think of this as a practice round.”
“Practice round?”
He hums in conformation, tapping your ass lightly, making it ripple against his hand. “Alright, go take a leak before you get a UTI.” He laughs when you push his shoulder. The same old blunt, shameless Jungkook.
He stops you before you disappear into the bathroom. “I hope this won’t make things awkward between us. Like, we’re still friends, right?”
Friends.
It takes all of your strength to give him a nod. You ponder over his words as you clean up in the bathroom. Why did you feel so... conflicted? You’re so happy, but you’re also kinda sad. It’s like your mood solely depends on Jungkook. His words have the power to pull you in whatever direction he pleases. You stare at yourself in the mirror.
All these emotions must mean you have a crush on him.
You sigh, flicking off the light and then heading back into your room.
Jungkook is hunkered down in your sea of pillows, soft snores leaving his parted lips. Chest rising and falling steadily. Hair messy, fanned around him.
He looks so beautiful and peaceful.
You tilt your head at the sight. He always told you that he never spends the night after a hookup.
The blanket is only covering his pelvis, strong legs poking out from underneath. His sweats are still on his ankles. You giggle, attempting to slide them off without waking him.
“Bambi,” he mutters sleepily, opening his big arms. “C’mere.”
You feel your cheeks heat up. You shuffle into bed, throwing the covers over both of your bare bodies. 
He wraps his arms around you, pecking your forehead before drifting back into slumber.
Fuck.
What have you gotten yourself into?
Tumblr media
© chryblossomjjk 2022 [do not copy, translate or repost]
9K notes · View notes
entername322 · 3 months
Text
Her highness
Minji (New jeans) x Male Reader
Length: 11341 words
Previous part
Tumblr media
“What do you mean we're not doing karaoke? It was your idea”, Things have been very fishy for you recently, at least according to Jin, “Yeah, I did plan that, but you know, life”, He glances around a little to look at Haewon who's passive aggressively staring at you. “Whatever the fuck is happening between you and Hae, you better fix it fast before this whole thing blew up”, With the frustration all over his face you didnt have the heart to tell him you're dropping off college soon. Nah just joking, “Jin, I'm dropping out soon”, Whatever you just said just send Jin to a cardiac arrest. “Are you shitting me?” You can clearly see he's boiling up, “No, dad's gonna get busy with honeymoon soon and-” The punch was quick, you can follow it with your eyes but you decided to just let him land it.
“What the fuck is wrong with you. Like what on earth did you do in the last few months? You know what? I don't care, fix it and get your shit back together”, Thankfully he still has the composure to keep his voice down, of course that doesn't mean nobody saw the punch. “Oi, what the fuck are you two doing?” Ren and the rest came to you and broke up the ‘fight’. “Ask him”, Jin glared at me, “Guys, I will have to drop out of college soon”, Of course this news silences the whole room. “You're joking”, Of course, they knew the answer, “Fuck then what about this? This whole fucking shit was your idea”, Being a leader is kinda annoying huh? You see Jin just slips away from the room.
Jin's departure slammed the door on whatever fragile camaraderie remained. Their eyes, once alight with shared dreams, glinted with cold betrayal. You felt the weight of their judgement like a physical blow, the respect you'd meticulously cultivated crumbling to dust in their vacant stares. "Can I go out first?" you asked, your voice surprisingly steady. "I have somewhere to be. Wouldn't want to make things awkward."
Awkward. A woefully inadequate word for the gaping chasm that had opened between you and your creation. Your band, cobbled together from dreams and desperation, now resembled a wreckage, each member a splintered piece of the illusion you'd woven.
Their silence screamed volumes. The air, thick with unspoken accusations, tasted bitter on your tongue. You remembered the meticulous courtship, the careful promises whispered like sweet nothings. You'd scouted them out, these talented yet directionless souls, lured them in with visions of stardom and the clinking promise of tuition fees.
Brotherhood, you'd called it. A bond forged in sweat and ambition. But it was all a lie, a gilded cage you'd built with your ill-gotten gains. You, the puppeteer orchestrating their dreams, the benefactor playing God with their futures. And now, the strings had snapped. The music, once vibrant and hopeful, had devolved into a discordant dirge. You weren't their leader anymore, just a faded mirage revealed in the harsh light of betrayal. Letting them go, scattering them back into the indifferent arms of life, wasn't a decision, it was an acceptance. This band, this fleeting experiment, was never meant to be permanent. A hobby fueled by boredom and an insatiable need for control, it had run its course. “I wish you good luck”
.
.
.
The sobs ripped through her like a rogue storm, each tear a glistening shard of her fractured trust. Minji clung to you with the raw desperation of a shipwrecked sailor, her body shaking against yours like a fragile leaf in a hurricane. You felt the tremors of her pain coursing through you, a dissonance in the carefully orchestrated melody of your scheme. Yet, beneath the icy satisfaction, a twisted kind of admiration bloomed. This volcanic eruption of her emotions, this primal display of possessiveness, was the raw material you needed to forge your queen. Minji, in her shattered state, was closer to your vision than ever before.
Her questions, choked with tears and doubt, echoed in the room: "Was it all a charade? Am I not your only love? Was there… someone else?" Instead of flinching, you met her gaze head-on, your eyes pools of icy amusement. "Hush, now babe", you murmured, your voice a soothing balm against the rawness of her storm. "There's only you. You're the sun my world revolves around, the fire that ignites my soul…. That sounds so fucking cringe", Your futile attempt at humour has fail to lighten her moods.
“You know I only got you babe, now and forever. That's what we promised right? That's why you buy those books to guide you through these trying times”, Your words, laden with a seductive truthfulness, were carefully chosen arrows aimed at the target of her insecurities. You knew her weaknesses, the fault lines running deep within her heart. And you exploited them, not with malice, but with the precision of a sculptor moulding clay.
"Perhaps, it's time for me to come out in the open”, You continued, tracing comforting circles on her trembling back, "Whatever I've planned for you, it's for your own good babe. I love you, more than you love me. So the same way you want me to be the best version of myself for you, I wanted you to be the best version of yourself for me too. I'm sorry that I have to put you through this, but this, this little dance that we do, it excites me. It's all just a little trial, so that you can be the perfect girl for me. Should I stop this babe, or should I continue this, and turn you into the perfect”, You leaned closer to her ears, “Wife?” The question hung heavy in the air, a challenge veiled in promises. You saw the flicker of uncertainty in her eyes, the battle between fear and ambition raging within her. But you knew, you just knew, that the monster in her hungered for more than just affection. She craved control, a throne beside yours, a kingdom to share in the spoils of your deceit.
"But there were whispers," she whimpered, clinging to the last shred of doubt. "Haewon… she said…" You silenced her with a gentle kiss, your lips a whispered promise on hers. "Haewon is a moth drawn to q flame, babe. A jealous girl who'll never understand the dance we share. You, Minji, are the one that I only ever cared about. I want you, to turn as corrupt, as degenerate, and as starved as I am. In the end there will be no one else but us”, As her sobs subsided, replaced by a cautious, flickering hope, you knew you had won. You had steered her fear towards ambition, her jealousy towards loyalty. Minji, the tigress, was slowly shedding her kitten fur, her claws unfurling with every whispered promise, every seductive truth.
“I have you, I only have you since day one oppa, why are you doing this to me? Did I not show you my love enough?” She felt betrayed, yet again, it's not like there's anything you can do to make her leave, whether you like it or not. “Because I love you. You love claiming me, you love having me in this little world of ours and you want me to never leave. Yet I can't stay here forever, I love people, I love the crowd, the attention, the adoration, I love it when I walk into a room and have everyone bow to me in respect. So I have to break you down first baby, so I can mould you, to the perfect queen for me. I'm sorry that I hurt you this much baby, I never meant to ruin you, all I want to do is show you, that this is who I am. I'm sorry okay, I really do, but I'm doing this for our own good”
Yeah that's not very convincing is it? Yet, you both know Minji can't step out of this anymore. Entrapped, by her own ‘love’ towards you, the "why" wasn't important anymore. The elaborate justifications, the convoluted games, all dissolved in the face of your shared truth. Perhaps you'd hoped for anger, for defiance, even for rejection, something that would add more fuel to the chaos you've made. But instead, Minji's silence was a balm to the burning truth you'd laid bare. It spoke of understanding, of a recognition that mirrored your own, a whispered acknowledgment that this twisted symphony they danced to was somehow their anthem.
Her fingers tightened around yours, a silent pact replacing the unspoken accusations. This wasn't submission, not surrender. It was a meeting point, a crossroads where their paths, both paved with shadows, intertwined into a single, storm-swept road. "You're insane”, she whispered, her voice a feather-light caress against your cheek, "but so am I. And maybe, in this broken world, that's enough”, You've done it, you turn her into an emo girl. 
The statement, simple yet profound, hit you like a rogue wave. Her acceptance, so stark and unconditional, was the missing piece you hadn't known you craved. It felt like breathing after years of holding your breath, a rawness that simultaneously terrified and exhilarated you. Together, you sat in the quiet aftermath of your confessions, two sides of the same tainted coin, two halves of a whole sculpted from darkness. There would be no apologies, no promises of redemption, just the shared understanding that your dance, was theirs alone.
The silence that draped around you after your revelations wasn't heavy, but filled with future possibility. You scooped Minji up, cradling her close like a precious shard of the storm just weathered. In the hushed intimacy of the living room, bathed in the soft glow of a single lamp, you revelled in the newfound solidity of the bond forged in the crucible of truth. Her body, still trembling from the emotional storm, fit perfectly against yours, a puzzle piece clicking into place. You felt the warmth of her breath against your neck, a whisper of shared understanding. Gone were the accusations, the hurt, replaced by a quiet confidence, a dark symphony now playing in unison.
As you gently settled onto the couch, your gaze fell upon the abandoned book splayed on the floor, a silent witness to the whirlwind that had just passed. It was the one she'd thrown in a fit of anger, its pages splayed open like a dissected butterfly.
During this you noticed her book lay abandoned on the coffee table, a silent testament to the storm that had just swept through your living room. Minji, nestled against you, breathing in your comforting scent, slowly she notices a foreign smell, a sickening feeling starts to well up inside her. Minji’s playful mood slowly evaporated, suddenly the air felt thick with the cloying sweetness of cheap Jasmine perfume. It felt heavy, clinging to you like a second skin. It wasn't her scent, not by a long shot. Her nose crinkled, a storm brewing behind her bright facade. The smell of an old rival, a ghost that you've promised her to be exorcised from your heart.
"Trust and communication?" she scoffed, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "This author must have missed the chapter where husbands spend half the night glued to their phones and come back smelling of a cheap whore’s perfume instead of cologne”, Right, you forgot that Haewon almost embraced you earlier, which is enough for Minji's nose to pick up her scent. “Oh, this?" You chuckled, feigning nonchalance. "Just catching up with an old friend, sharing some stories. Nothing to worry about, sweetheart”, Minji has grown a little more, she notices that you didn't really try to lie, you want her to dig deeper, which she did.
Tumblr media
Minji jumped onto your lap, grabbing your face, she bared her claws, digging into your cheek, her voice turning steely. "Sharing stories, huh? And sharing something else too, it seems. Tell me, babeee, does your 'friend' always wear perfume that smells like a used cleaning cloth?" The playful facade crumbled. You saw the hurt flickering in her eyes, the anger simmering just beneath the surface. Haewon's scent, a careless residue from a fleeting encounter, felt like a betrayal etched into the air. Minji, a defiant queen waiting for her answer, you smiled seeing this sight, such a beauty isn't she?
The playfulness was gone, replaced by a simmering intensity as Minji’s claws traced angry lines on your cheek. Her voice, sharp as broken glass, sliced through the tension-laden air. "Used cleaning cloth, huh? That's new”, A little smile forms on your face which you hide with your hand. “A fucking street whore throwing herself on to you at any moment possible. How is she there? You said she won't come”, Shame and remorse were strangers to you at this moment. This wasn't a confession dripping with guilt, it was a calculated provocation, a lit match tossed into the tinderbox of Minji's emotions. Every word, every flinch, was a brushstroke in the grand masterpiece you were composing.
"It wasn't like that," you began, your voice a feigned sigh of exasperation. "She was there at the performance, completely unexpected. We talked..." The air crackled with her disbelief. "Talked, you say?" Minji echoed, her eyes boring into yours like twin lasers. "And did this 'talk' involve her whispering sweet things on to you as you FUCKED HER behind my back?" The lie you'd woven about Haewon's absence evaporated in the crucible of her gaze. Denials would be futile, a flimsy curtain against the hurricane of her suspicion. So, you embraced the storm, your voice steady as you plunged into the icy waters of truth. "She said... she might be pregnant”, You admitted, your eyes carefully preyed upon her brewing madness.
The revelation hit Minji like a rogue wave. The fire in her eyes flickered momentarily, replaced by a chilling mix of shock and something akin to... fear. The claws digging into your skin relaxed, leaving behind crimson trails, a testament to the tempest that had just raged within her. Silence descended, the air thick with the weight of your confession. This wasn't just a betrayal of trust, it was a detonator, threatening to blow apart the twisted kingdom you'd built with Minji. But the tigress was no damsel in distress.
She pushed herself off your lap, her movements sharp and controlled. Her gaze, unwavering, held a cocktail of emotions - hurt, anger, and a flicker of something darker, something predatory.
Minji's claws retracted, not in defeat, but in a shift in focus. The fire in her eyes, previously aimed at you, burned brighter now, honed to a singular point – Haewon. The scent of the cheap perfume, no longer a mere annoyance, became a tangible object of her ire, a crimson flag planted in the territory of their twisted kingdom. "Pregnant, you say?" She echoed, her voice a low snarl, each word dripping with venom. "So, she saunters into your life, throws her cheap wares around, and now wants to play house with stolen goods?” You merely laughed at her oversight, “Babe, we just broke up like a month ago, maybe less, there's a chance it was from before you and me even a thing”, That's true, but in Minji's mind, you are her, regardless of the timeline.
The silence hung heavy in the air, a poison dart that had struck Minji right in the heart. That word, pregnant, rings countless times in her ears. Haewon, that vapid, spiteful creature, pregnant with what might be your child. Minji's claws, retracted a moment ago, dug back into your cheek, this time not in anger, but in a desperate attempt to anchor herself in this dizzying reality. "A month ago?" she breathed, her voice a fractured whisper. "You're mine oppa, I don't care if it's a month ago or a year ago, she stole you from me", The proclamations hung heavy, a storm brewing behind her fiery eyes. You met her gaze, a dark smile playing on your lips. "Alright, babe", you purred, your voice laced with a dangerous calm. "You and your... melodrama. But Haewon is just a little bump in our way, a fleeting distraction, a moth drawn to the flame only to get singed."
The truth, twisted and barbed, hung between you. A month ago, Haewon had been a convenient plaything, a diversion in the intoxicating madness that was Minji. But pregnant? That shifted the game in ways you hadn't anticipated, adding a delicious layer of chaos to the symphony you were composing. Minji, however, saw only one thing – threat. Haewon, not as a rival, but as a permanent stain on their twisted tapestry. The tigress within her reared its head, a guttural growl escaping her throat.
"Erase her," she hissed, her eyes blazing with a fire you found strangely beautiful. "Erase her from your life, from your thoughts, from every goddamn molecule of your body”, The possessiveness in her voice, the raw need to claim you as her own, sent a thrill down your spine. This, this was the Minji you craved, the one consumed by the flames of your twisted love, the one willing to dance on the edge of destruction for a taste of your dark symphony.
You leaned in, your breath ghosting over her ear. "That, my love”, You murmured, your voice dripping with seductive promise, "is precisely what we'll do. Together."
The pregnancy, that tangled mess of Haewon's moves, became the fuel for your shared purpose. Each whispered plan, each strategic strike against her rival, was a brushstroke in the masterpiece they were co-creating. Minji, fueled by righteous fury, became your partner-in-crime, her darkness mirroring your own in a mesmerising spectacle of shared chaos. You orchestrated a subtle but ruthless campaign, chipping away at Haewon's life until she was nothing but a hollow shell, clinging to a phantom hope. It wasn't just about erasing her, it was about painting Minji's name on your soul in bold, defiant strokes.
With each act of vengeance, Minji shed the last vestiges of the playful tigress, evolving into something darker, more primal. The pleasure you derived from it wasn't morbid, it was aesthetic. You were a sculptor, moulding her fury into a weapon, her possessiveness into a shield, her desire for you into an inferno that threatened to consume them both. In the flickering shadows of your twisted kingdom, where trust was a forgotten language and loyalty a weapon, you watched Minji blossom into the queen you always knew she could be. Her anger, once directed at you, had morphed into a shared crusade, a twisted tango where Haewon was the unwitting victim.
Exhaustion tugged at you like a riptide, pulling you under the velvet waves of sleep. You dragged Minji to bed, and in one quick sweep the fatigue almost took your consciousness away as soon as you dropped to the bed. Minji, however, remained a restless reef, sharp and jagged against your soft shore. The air still crackled with the aftershocks of Haewon's bomb, casting a long shadow of uncertainty over your twisted Eden. You tumbled into slumber, but it was a shallow haven, riddled with thoughts and plans for the final act you've set up. Minji, sensing your vulnerability, clung to you like a vine to a crumbling wall, desperate to anchor herself in the shifting landscape of your emotions.
As the night wore on, your sleep became a battlefield. Minji, a whirlwind of possessive fervour, left a trail of love bites across your skin – branding you with her claim, etching her name in the flesh you offered up as a canvas. Each mark, a crimson sigil in the flickering lamplight, whispered a silent declaration: "Mine” of course, she's very vocal about it as well. “You're mine oppa, I'm not letting any whore touch you again”, And, “That bitch won't be a problem anymore oppa, I'll make sure of it”, and some more monologue that tug you away from the warm embrace of rest. You stirred, half-awake, half-lost in the tangled web of sleep and desire. Minji's lips, hot and demanding, trailed a fiery path down your throat, her touch a desperate plea for reassurance, for ownership. You yielded, not unwillingly, but with a detached amusement. Her anxiety was your aphrodisiac, her possessiveness a twisted mirror reflecting your own desires.
The lovemaking was a dance of shadows, bodies entwined in a desperate quest for solace and control. Minji, no longer the playful tigress, was a predator defending her territory, marking her prey with the fierce beauty of her claws. And you, the ever-enigmatic maestro, conducted this dark symphony with a languid smile, your own desires veiled in a mist of shadows and calculated intent.
You closed your own eyes, the taste of her possessiveness lingering on your tongue. Sleep beckoned again, this time deeper, darker, pregnant with the promise of chaos. For in the kingdom of your twisted love, dawn was not a symbol of renewal, but a prelude to the next act, a twisted tango where trust was a weapon, passion a battlefield, and every bite, every mark, a declaration of war against the ghosts of yesterday and the uncertainties of tomorrow.
.
.
.
“Yeah, so what do I do now?” You are talking with your dad, about Haewon of course. “You got someone pregnant, to be honest I'm surprised it took you this long”, You can't argue with that one, “It's not my fault okay? She refused to take the pills”, Yes, you have contacted Haewon again, under the supervision of Minji, and she has taken a pregnancy test and shows that she's pregnant. “You know what you want to do already”, His eyes pierced through your deception, “Yes”, Moral is, a flimsy concept you like to dance around with, of course this trait is something you've gotten from your dad. “Is she rich?” You shake your head, “Does Minji know about this?” You nodded which made him frown.
“It would be troublesome if she finds out about your plan wouldn't it?” You shake your head again before telling him what transpired between you and Minji. Just the main part, the fact that she is just downright insane and obsessed with you, of course you take no blame for her transformation. “I knew you were a bad influence on her”, He's your dad, he knows your mind okay? “I plead innocence”, Do you have the right to do that? “Denied, we'll talk about that later. For now, deal with your ex, do what you must”, That's all you need to hear.
“Thanks dad, you're such a great father”, He doesn't even bother acknowledging your sarcastic remark as he leaves the house. Then Minji scurry off from the next room and jump to your lap. “Does he say yes?” She has such an innocent excitement on her, “Yes babe, we will ruin Haewon's life”, Which is so fucked up since the two of you are planning to rip apart Haewon. “Great, finally”, She nuzzled up to you, “I need to talk with Mina”, She immediately raised her head hearing a girl's name. “Who is that?” The new Minji isn't scared to bare her fang anytime she needs to, “Dad's assistant, also my mentor for the internship I have”, You pulled out your phone only for her to immediately snatch it away.
"Funny”, She breathed, her voice barely above a whisper, "you never mentioned her before”, The accusation hung heavy in the air, a barb aimed at your perceived deception. You could have easily backpedalled, spun a web of lies to appease her, but something rebellious stirred within you. This wasn't the Minji of old, the one who accepted your every word as gospel. This was a new Minji, born from the ashes of Haewon's betrayal, a tigress who demanded truth, who wouldn't hesitate to tear through the shadows if you dared to hide in them.
You could almost hear the gears in her mind turning, suspicion and jealousy swirling like a storm cloud. You weren't afraid, not in the slightest. This was just another act in your twisted play, a minor inconvenience that fueled the fire of her possessiveness. "Just a colleague, babe”, You drawled, a playful smirk dancing on your lips. "Helping me out with the internship”, You tried to take your phone back but she refuses to let go, "Conveniently absent from your usual repertoire", she quipped, her eyes gleaming with challenge.
You couldn't help but chuckle, a low rumble that vibrated through your chest. "Mina's not part of the story, darling. She's only a little cameo in our story, and I need her to finish our plans, so may I have my phone back?" The truth, of course, was more complex. Mina was a pawn in your twisted game, a piece to be moved across the board to elicit a specific reaction from Minji. Now that Haewon is being removed from the picture, you need a new doll, and Mina would be perfect for that. Minji's jealousy, a predictable yet volatile element, was the accelerant you needed to feed Mister Hyde.
But the act of pretending, of downplaying Mina's significance, was its own reward. The flicker of annoyance in Minji's eyes, the subtle tightening of her jaw, was a delicious confirmation of your power, of your ability to manipulate her emotions like a puppet with strings. "Oh, really?" Minji's voice dripped with scepticism. "Then why the secrecy, maestro? Why not introduce me to this… mentor of yours?" The challenge was implicit. A dare, a test of your commitment to this twisted game. You met her gaze, a mischievous glint in your own eyes.
"Fine, if you insist", You shrugged, a feigned sigh escaping your lips. "But be warned, babe, Mina's a bit… bland. Not something you would have fun meeting with”, So rude, however Mina is a silent type that just can't get along with you. You don't mind introducing her, you knew it would pique Minji's interest, fuel the embers of her competitive spirit. Minji thrived on being the centre of your attention, the object of your desire. Introducing a rival, even a fabricated one, was simply adding fuel to the fire.
.
.
.
“Mina, meet Minji, my new sister”, You stare Mina down, her pale figure seeming to shimmer in the shadows. Her delicate features, framed by dark raven hair, held the same unnerving stillness you once found captivating in Haewon. But Mina lacked the fiery edge, the malicious spark that burned beneath Haewon's surface. This one was a blank canvas, a porcelain doll waiting to be painted in the twisted hues of your desire.
The word sister in the air, a deliberate bomb dropped into the simmering tension. Minji, mid-sip of her wine, froze, her eyes flashing emerald fire. Sister? The possessive glint in them was replaced by a flicker of suspicion, the tigress sniffing out the absurdity of your claim. But before Minji could unleash her trademark hiss, you added another twist, your lips curling into a smirk. "And of course, my girlfriend, as well.” The room descended into an icy silence. Minji's jaw clenched, the wine glass held hostage between her white-knuckled fingers. Mina, however, remained unfazed. Her porcelain face flickered not even an inch, her gaze as detached as ever.
Minji, stare at you silently, “Don't you dare play this game with me”, You met her fury with a calm smile, enjoying the spectacle of her controlled outrage. "But babe", You purred, leaning closer, "It's only the truth. We may not share any blood but our name will be united soon, twisted to a lovely yet scandalous romance story”, You smiled innocently as you kissed Minji's cheek. “Twisted indeed”, Mina didn't even blink, her glacial eyes reflecting nothing but a cold amusement. “Sister and girlfriend, huh?" she finally drawled, her voice a silken blade. "Sounds like you've upgraded your moral compass from rusty to non-existent. Quite the family reunion, you'll be having soon sir", The barb stung, but you merely chuckled. You craved Mina's bluntness, her ability to pierce through your carefully constructed facade. Her lack of filter nor decency to not curse her own boss is something you always value the most.
“Come on now Mina, we're in love, haven't you ever felt young love before?” Her silent gaze answered it, “Don't make fun of our relationship, this bond is deeper than what you will understand”, Minji scoffed at Mina. "Oh, I bet," Mina drawled, her glacial gaze flitting between you and Minji. "Deeper than a Mariana Trench trench of red flags, perhaps? Incestuous entanglements spiced with a dash of public manipulation? Should I order a book called 'Ethics for Dummies' to fill your office bookshelf so that it can comfortably be placed alongside the other books you've never read before sir?” Quite the feisty one isn't she?
“Come on Mina, we're in a dog eat dog kind of world, nobody cares about this arrangement”, You shrugged, “Dogs with a penchant for family therapy, it seems”, She eyed Minji who just glared at her. “So my kind and ever so humble sir, is this 'sister-girlfriend' arrangement the only reason why I'm here? I believe I am quite a bad therapist, however if you do insist I do have a basic common sense so I believe I can manage”, You can't help but laugh, Mina is not a firecracker, she's an ice cold equivalent of that. 
“I have some issue to deal with, I believe dad has told you the details?” She shakes her head, “Of course, I expected that as well”, She doesn't even react, why do you even bother trying to fish some kind of reaction from her? Oh right, it's not her reaction you're fishing for, “Stop being such a flirt”, It's Minji's. “First of all, I had some complications, you see my ex has been found to be pregnant”, Oh, you got a little tug on the fishing line, Mina let out a little chuckle. “How many of them sir?” You laughed as you shook your head. “So blunt, it's just one Mina. And the problem is, she doesn't want to deal with this quietly”, Finally, some reaction from Mina, she tilted her head with some ‘amusement’ in her eyes.
“And?” You don't really want to answer Mina do you? In order to see your progress you need to see Minji take the initiative and spearhead this whole operation. “I want her dead”, There she goes, they grow up so fast don't they? “So crude, but how could I judge after the brother-sister relationship you two are having?” There is one elephant in the room, a question you really want to hear Mina answer. “Does dad deal with this kind of problem too?” She has no reaction at all, yet there's sudden understanding between the two of you that you happily acknowledge.
“What was that?” Of course Minji doesn't appreciate it, she doesn't see what you see in Mina's eyes but she can definitely tell something is up just by looking at you.
“Nothing, Mina come here”, Minji grabbed your arm and stood up with you, “Baby I need some time to talk okay?” That's a pathetic attempt and you know it. “I'm coming with you”, The queens demand it, are you gonna disobey your queen? “Just wait here okay? We'll be right by the door”, Her eyes burned through your skull to send you her ultimatum. “Thank you baby”, You gave her a kiss as she sat back down, Mina followed you to the corner of the room, completely disregarding Minji's presence. “Quite the specimen you had there sir, is she as morally corrupt as you?” Mina taunted you, “Not really corrupt, just, different. Anyway she's a psycho and she wants Haewon dead due to jealousy”, Mina had this very small and almost unnoticeable gloating in her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. Don't act like you're free from the crossfire, look at the way she looks at you right now”, Minji's eyes are hollow and devoid of life.
“I am completely aware sir”, Mina said without turning to Minji, “So, I need you to make Haewon disappear, but not just that. I need you to make her death to be, ambiguous at best. Is that possible?” Mina silently stare at you, this time you can't seem to grasp what's in her mind. “Making people disappear without trace is possible, however I need some more explanation on how ambiguous you want it to be”, Should you tell her why? “Just, make sure that her body is never found. Minji is paranoid and has been thinking that I might have some reluctance to this whole operation. So it would be nice if Haewon's disappearance is all clouded in mystery. No missing person report, no dead body found, no trace of her disappearances or death”, Mina just shook her head. “That's our normal procedure for this sir”, Of course it is, how could you miss this part of the orientation. “Right, well sorry Mina it's my first time doing this okay?” She still looks at you with some disappointment before walking back to the table.
You just sighed and joined back with Minji, “So? How long?” Minji said impatiently, “2 weeks, it will be finished by 2 weeks, now if there's nothing else for me I'll leave you two for your family therapy”, Did Mina just make some porn jokes? “Well, that's all for now Mina, thank you for coming here”, Mina nodded before she stood up and left the house.
“So, what did you two talk about?” Minji said, ‘calmly’. “Haewon's parents, I felt for them, they're good people”, She slapped you for that. “They raised a whore”, Can't argue with that can't you? “Don't be too anxious now baby, I'm sure they never expected her to be like this. Now, we need some shopping for our parent's marriage, I was thinking about red as our matching colour”, She looks at you with some distrust but she nod, “No, let's wear something white, it's also signify our union”, Maybe Mina is right, you need some family therapy.
.
.
.
Tumblr media
“Sweetie, do you really have to wear some white dress?” Minji nods her head showing her determination, “You said that oppa and I can't have any official marriages so I want to at least have some resemblance to a wedding”, Your mom can only sigh in defeat dealing with this new Minji. “Here I thought you don't like being with people, this dress will put a lot of eyes on you, you know”, Yet there's still some happiness in her heart seeing jee daughter has finally broken out of her cocoon. “I don't mom, but oppa does and I will tolerate people for him”, Your mom smiled at her new daughter.
“Such a good wife”, Minji blushed a little hearing that from her own mom, “So, has that ex of his has been taken care off?” Minji frowned upon hearing that, “No, it's in one week and oppa has been keeping secrets from me again”, You can't just let Haewon die off screen can't you? “He's such a troublemaker isn't he? Sometimes I wonder if he's actually his father's son”, You are, your father has the same level of moral corruption but he causes less chaos than you. “I'm losing my mind mom, I loved him more than anything in the world and I want him to love me back as much as I do”, Despite her growth, there's still some childish innocence within Minji.
“Sweetie, life isn't a novel, sometimes all you can do is compromise. Your brother is a maniac with some split personality and you are an obsessed child who's guarding him like a dragon to its trophy. You both make compromise for each other, and sometimes that's good enough”
Minji frowned and couldn't comprehend how much you compromised for her, it's not that many to be fair. “I still don't like it, why does he have to be secretive about everything? I just want him to be open to me, is that so hard?” Minji just sinked her head into her mom's embrace. “Oh sweetie, if he's so secretive and you don't like it, maybe you should find someone else?” Minji immediately pulled away from the embrace. “Are you crazy mom?” Her mom just laughed and shrugged. “All I'm saying is, if he's not the one for you then find someone else. If you don't want to, then you need to change as well”, Minji sighed. “I want to change, I want to be able to pick apart his lies like he was a book I've read a thousand times. I need time for that mom, and until then I can only swallow my jealousy and study him”
Your mom took Minji to a hug, “Listen baby, I'm happy that you have grown like this. I would support you with all my heart, but I put your father over you from now on”, That's pretty fucking hard isn't it? “So if he breaks my heart you won't do anything?” Minji scoffed, “No, I would be furious, but I won't do anything to make my husband sad, you know how it is”, Like mother like daughter. “Fine, but I won't take this much longer, I need help in making sure that whore is dead”, Minji is making move my man, “I see, I'll see what I can do”, This does put Minji in a much more relaxed state, at least for the wedding. “Now, smile and have fun, it's your mother's wedding day”
“You're such a problematic child”, Always nice hearing your father losing his patience with you isn't it? “Thanks dad”, You smiled happily, “Whatever, hopefully that Haewon girl won't be the death of you. Mina said her family is quite influential and she is gonna need some extra time”, You frowned upon hearing that, some extra time might cause, unpredictable behaviour for Minji. “Yeah, what can you do? '' Unpredictability is just some fun in your book anyway. “If this marriage ceremony goes to shit just so you know your mom will kill you”, You don't, but it's nice of your father to tell you that.
“It won't dad, now come on it's your wedding day, smile”, He slapped your head, “Yeah thanks dad I'll be outside mingling with the guests”, You fixed your hair for a moment, “Don't cause trouble”, You shrugged without promising him anything. As you get to the venue you start mingling with your dad's business partners. Taking control of the room as you dance along to this social event. Time feels blurry for you as you keep jumping from conversation to conversation. Joining every circle like you belong there before leaving to join another one. This is your playground, you thrive in this place, yet, it feels old, meeting the same face again and again.
Then you look at Minji, coming into the venue, grabbing everyone's attention. Your gaze locked with hers and you sent her a smile. Walking towards her you can see she's imitating her mother's cold aura, although it's weak but it sends the signal that she's not talking to anyone. “You look great Min”, You smiled as you walked up to her, “Thank you oppa, you look great as well”, She smiled happily. “Now, I want to go around meeting your mother's business partners and introduce myself. Hopefully you're ready to just stand there and smile as I socialise okay?” She sighed feeling disappointed, she already expected that you wanted to do that, but she still felt disappointed.
“Okay oppa, lead the way”, Minji sighed, the sound barely audible, but her grip on your arm tightened ever so slightly. She knew the drill, the silent agreement you'd forged in this twisted love of yours. In public, you were brother and sister, an enviable pair navigating the gilded cages of high society. In private, you were something else entirely – something more, passionate and throughly fucked up.
With Minji clinging to your arm like a silent shadow, you began your calculated waltz through the traps of guests. Each introduction, each handshake, was a performance, a tune in the masterpiece you were co-creating. You revelled in the way your mother's associates fawned over you, their surprise of your confidence and eloquence while their eyes were seizing you for any possible threats. This battlefield is nothing but a source of distraction you forced upon Minji so she can take her mind off Haewon.
Minji, though quiet, was not simply a passive observer. Her icy gaze darted through the crowd, missing nothing. She noted the way women's eyes lingered on you, the envy simmering beneath their painted smiles, the subtle unease you evoked in certain men. She is your queen, even in silence, her claws hidden, her loyalty fierce. “You two look practically inseparable," one woman cooed to another, her eyes flitting between you and Minji. "Like siblings from birth”, You laughed at her comment as Minji felt tremor through her body, her grip tightened on your arm as she put on a forced smile. “Well, what do you think sis? Maybe we are separated  from birth”, You laughed, Minji internally cringed the moment you called her sis, “It wouldn't change anything would it?” Such a brazen comment, perhaps even if the two of you are blood connected she would still go after you.
After a while the ceremony finally starts, you and Minji happily sit at the front, side by side watching your parents being united. Her hand stealthily grabbed yours and intertwined your finger together. As your mother reads her vow you can hear Minji speak those vows underneath her breath, audible only to you. You can't help but laugh hearing this desperate plea from her, and as soon as your father read his vows you did the same thing. “I do”, you're not sure if you heard your mom or Minji say that, “I do”, You said as well the moment your father said it. 
Tumblr media
Seeing your parents kissing signifying their union you can feel Minji get restless, she wants to kiss you as well. Your parents smiled at the two of you, then Minji just pulled you away from the ballroom as the crowd was cheering for your parents. “So eager already?” You laughed as you followed Minji and brought you to a secluded dressing room. The crowd noise sounds distant and muffled, Minji locked the door before jumping on to you, pressing her lips to yours. Her body is pushing you to the wall as all her desire burns out of her body. “You're my husband now oppa”, A silent declaration in this empty room, is that how your wedding goes? “Baby, I want something a little more…… well more. But okay, we can pretend I'm your fiancé now”, That would suffice for Minji.
Her hands immediately grabbed your shirt and started unbuttoning it, “I want you oppa, we haven't had sex in the last 3 days because of this stupid rehearsal”, She growled before jumping in and biting your collarbone. “So naughty, you want to walk around our parent's marriage with my cum in your stomach?” Perhaps the fact that you said ‘our parents’ is already weird, no? “Those fucking girls, looking at you with lust, those old hags trying to sell you their daughters. I HATE THEM”, She yelled before biting down your neck. “That's gonna leave a mark”, You sighed before undressing your own sister. Unlike Minji you are doing it very gently, making sure you don't ruin her dress.
“Now there babe, don't ruin my pants please, I want to keep it clean”, She scoffed at you but thankfully she pulled your pants off gently. As soon as she pulled out your cock she immediately swallowed it whole. Minji has turned into a throat god as she has been milking you everytime you want to go out. “Fuck Minji, calm down there”, You groaned feeling how eager her tongue is moving. Her gag reflex is all gone as your cock easily passed her mouth into her throat. You can see your cock bulging through her little neck which is very hot. Her eyes look at you with a demanding look asking you to use her mouth like a toy.
You put both hands on her head, “Ready?” Useless question, she was born ready. Immediately you started to fuck her face mercilessly. Wet sloppy noise can be heard as she starts to drool on your cock. Her eyes start to water, ruining her mascara, such a beautiful sight. “Fuck your throat felt so good, sis”, That sounds so wrong yet so hot. Minji grabbed on your thighs for stability as you continued rocking her head up and down. Your hand went to slap her cheek making her let out a moan as you continued pounding her face. Feeling a little bad for her neck you stop moving her head, your hand held her hair gently before you moved your hips instead. 
“Fuck you're si fucking hot when you're like this Mini”, Ruined mascara, red cheek from your slaps and eyes rolled to the back of her head, she look so helpless. Minji loves when she's being used as your doll, being a little submissive girl just to serve her oppa. That's all she ever wanted, and also cutting off any girl who tried to talk to you. Looking down you can see her pussy starts to drip some liquid on the floor, “You like this sis? Being used like a toy?” You slapped her face again making her let out a loud moan as her leg started to squirm. “Fuck you're such a slut, I'm fucking cumming”, You shove it down to her throat as you pressed her head deeper into your crotch, your cock sprays down it's sperm down her throat into her stomach. You can hear her let out a scream as her leg starts to shake from an orgasm she's having.
Once you're done you let go of her hair and pull out your cock, Minji lay down on the floor panting hard as she felt like she might pass out soon. “Hey, you're tired already”, You laughed taunting her, “No, come on oppa, just fuck me already oppa”, She whined as her finger starts to prepare her pussy for you. “Don't need to tell me twice”, You laughed before laying down on her, your cock slipped into her pussy with ease, her pussy is already moulded to accommodate for your length. Your hand rests on her hips holding it tightly as you start to rock back and forth. “Ohhhhh fuck oppaaa”, Her moans echoes through the empty room as you starts to pick up your pace.
Minji's hand grabbed on to your back as her nails started to dig into it, “You're so big oppa”, Knowing full well the best way to arouse you is by stroking your ego. Your hip continues pounding her making a rhythmic slapping noise that fills up the whole room. Soon you can see her body starting to squirm and her nails starting to carve your back. “Cum oppa, pleaseeee”, She can't take it much longer, and her whimpering noises are music to your ears. You grabbed her body, forcing her to stand up and turn her body around. She leaned to the wall for support as you started to pound her from behind. “Ahhhh, oppa”, She moaned as you slapped her ass, “You like that you perv?” You laughed as you slapped her again.
“Oppa, please cum already”, Minji whined as she tried to hold her own orgasm. Your hand grabbed her hair into a ponytail gently before pulling her roughly. “Cum for me baby, I want to hear you scream”, Your other hand wrapped around her and pinched her nipple. You pushed deeper and harder, your hips crashed into hers, making every inch of Minji’s body shake and quake in pleasure until she felt her pussy explode with a mindblowing orgasm that forced her to collapse into the wall. The pounding did not stop with her orgasm, not even in the slightest. 
“I'm gonna fill this tight pussy up", You yelled as your hand gripped her hips and buried yourself balls deep inside her pussy. "Fuck, give it to me, cum in my pussy oppa" She yelled as her orgasm is still going on. Minji felt hot sticky ball batter streaming into her womb as you gripped her throat and choked her, laying over her back with beads of sweat pouring onto her hot body. Your ball emptying everything it has deep into her as Minji felt every twitch your cock is having inside her pussy. As the ecstasy passed you let go of her hand and she slumped down on the wall and sat on the floor, looking up to you with a helpless eye. Then she moves closer to you and starts to clean your cock from any sperm that still sticks on to it.
“Good girl”, You pat her head making her smile proudly, she kissed the tip of your cock as she finished her job before standing up to hug you. “I really want more oppa”, She whined, “That would be unwise baby, we still have a party to attend”, She clicked her tongue before looking at you with fiery eyes, “Once we're home we're gonna fuck and lock ourselves in the bedroom for three days”, Sounds like a challenge, “Okay baby, now go get dressed okay?” You kissed her cheek.
Thankfully her dress isn't ruined by any means, however your shirt was absolutely stained and ruffled by her earlier. “Thank god I brought some back up outfit”, Of course this is gonna happen, you expected this already. “Then let's go sneak back to the changing room oppa, I'm not ready to follow you back to the party”, You haphazardly used your shirt and tried to hide the stains with the blazer you're wearing. Then you and Mini stealthily get back into the dressing room where you change your outfit to a turtleneck and long overcoat. “You're sure you're not cold with that dress babe? It's pretty cold right now, you know?” You said as you fix your hair.
“Hmmmm, I want your coat oppa”, She tried to pull it off of you. “Oh no way lady, if you were more gentle with my blazer earlier I would've given you this. But now that you fucked that one up with your sweat I only have this coat”, She frowned hearing your rejection. That would be perfect for her, the blazer actually isn't totally ruined. There's some little wet spot in it and that's pretty much it. Minji pridefully wore it before posing in the mirror. Thankfully for her, her face would be enough distraction to make sure people didn't realise the little wet spot on the blazer. “Thank you oppa”, She smiled brightly, it's pretty obvious, she want to wear it as a warning for everyone.
“You two are so cute together, are you sure you're just siblings?” The effect is noticeable from your first encounter, “Please, we are also business partner, isn't that right Minji?” You smiled at Minji. “Of course, as the only child for each of our parents we've been taught to take our parent's company, now that they're married we have made an agreement to make sure some inheritance drama wouldn't happen”, Even Minji felt much more confident and chatty while she's wearing your blazer. “Ahhhh, hopefully you don't learn too much from your brother, otherwise you might start to get a lot of suitors soon”, Minji getting flirted on by other guys? Wouldn't that be….. an interesting way to play around with her obsession.
After chatting around for a while you went to the bathroom to just chill around from all the socialising you've been doing. Walking back to the venue however, you find a very interesting view. Minji is talking to a guy, young, a little short, very handsome. You stay silent and just watch her as she hasn't noticed your return just yet. The word talking is very loosely used to describe their interactions. The guy seems very adamant to try and get Minji to talk, yet Minji just smiled and laughed here and there without saying anything to him. Even a blind guy can see that she's highly uncomfortable with his presence. 
Then you see him slip something into her hand before walking away. Minji tried to open it before seeing you are watching her. She immediately ran up to you, “It took you so long”, She said seemingly forgotten about the earlier interaction. “Oh I was here for a while now, but you were busy with your friend so I was just watching”, Your eyes travel to the thing he slipped earlier, it seems to be a piece of paper. She also realised she was holding something, she threw it to the ground but you're fast enough to catch it. “Ohhhh? Isn't this interesting”, Just as expected, it was a phone number, “You should keep this Min”, You smiled trying to put on an angry smile as you gave it back to her.
Her face was filled with guilt and disbelief as you handed her the paper, “No I don't want it”, She crumpled it up before throwing it to a nearby trash can, she missed by the way. “Why not? You two seem to get along very well aren't you?” Her body is shaking as her eyes get teary, dear god it's so easy to tease her. “I'm not cheat-”, You immediately closed her mouth to make sure she didn't finish screaming that sentence. “Don't make a scene, and I need to talk with dad, so wait here”, You gave her an annoyed smile before walking away. 
Minji stays silent watching the wall, her hands tightened her grip and her nail sinks into her palm. You let her marinate in her own anger as you met your mom and dad. “Did you two have a fight already?” Your dad sighed, “Oh no, I was just teasing her”, Your mom looked at you with squinted eyes. “Sweetie, don't make a scene, also next time please try to find a more secure place to fuck, some people can hear you earlier”, Do you care? Does your parents care? “We do care if our special day is gonna be remembered as the start of a nasty rumour for your little endeavours”, Your dad easily read your expression. “Come on now, nothing gonna happen, nobody will know”, The two of them gave you a synced dissatisfied glare. “Okay, we won't be doing any of that, anyway me and Minji gonna go home earlier today okay”, You smiled innocently. “You should go home now”, Your mom said, “That would be bad sweetie, people will start to talk. Go home in an hour, and just sit on the balcony with Minji”, You bow your head in an exaggerated manner to them before walking off to the balcony.
Your eyes scanned the ballroom to see Minji is standing near the corner, her eyes filled with the void as she stares at the guy from earlier. “My sister is my girlfriend, and she's a psycho”, You laughed to yourself before finding Mina. She looks at you the moment you look at her, because she's creepy like that. You gestured to her to come and she silently joined you at the balcony. “Why the fuck are you asking for more time? Don't you always say that you can work efficiently”, She raised her eyebrow for a moment, “It's entertaining to see you panicking sir”, You just laughed at her. “It's amusing isn't it? Look at her, so innocent yet so corrupted already”, You nod at Minji who's watching you now.
“She is, how nice of you to find new toys to play with sir. I'm afraid I might be put in the crossfire now, aren't I?” You nod, Mina doesn't seem to be annoyed or angry about it. “I want to talk to her, Haewon”, What the fuck is wrong with you? Mina looks at you silently before speaking up, “I would say these are easy to manage, however I have a suspicion that you want to talk to her in person and not through a call”, You nod making her sigh. “I'll see what I can do sir”, She left you immediately without saying anything. You glance at Minji who's just staring at you with anger, disdain, guilt and jealousy. 
Then she walks to her mom, your mom, you watch them talk for a while before she walks to you. “I'm gonna kill him”, You're not really sure if that quick of an ending would be fun, “Me?” She shakes her head. “The guy who gave me his number. I'm gonna kill him, for you, to prove that I'm not cheating on you”, You giggled for a second. “I was just teasing you baby, don't get so worked up”, She moves closer to you which you immediately stop. “People are watching Minji, we can't just start kissing out here”, her face frowning even deeper. The two of you stay quiet for a while, she just stares at the floor, her shaking Jody tells you she's trying not to cry. “Let's go home, let's talk to mom and dad and say our goodbye before we go home”, She nodded without looking at you.
“Mom, dad, we are going home. Minji is feeling sick”, You put your hand around your sister as she's still looking down, “Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”, Your dad sighed. “That's quite long dad”, He shake his head, “I can't deal with you anymore. That's it you're out of college from now on, you make her this way you're fixing her”, You see Minji immediately raised her head. “There's nothing to fix, right mom?” You smiled innocently, “He's right dear, my dear Minji is perfect, it's your son that's the problem here”, Your dad nodded. “You're fixing your nasty personality as well. The two of you will be going to a couple therapy”, Don't say it, don't say it, “A family therapy?” The three of them clicked their tongue and rolled their eyes. “Alright see you later mom, dad, don't look for us for the next week okay?” You winked at them before leaving.
On the way home Minji starts to kiss your neck out of anxiety, “What are you doing?” She just moans and continues biting your neck. “Hey, stop that”, She scowls and stops biting your neck, but she continues hugging you. “I will make sure nobody dares to come to me again, oppa. I'm sorry, please don't be mad”, Her apology was sincere, her anger towards that random guy is also sincere. “I was just teasing you back then so calm down. Also you should just leave him alone, his family can get cranky if something happens to him”, She frowned and nodded. This however, is a turning point for Minji, as she disregards your words and goes behind your back.
.
.
.
“Minji”, You sighed while glaring at her, *What's wrong oppa?” She smiled innocently as she kissed your cheek. “Did you kill him? After I told you to leave him alone?” She just shrugged before hugging you, “I don't know who you're talking about”, An innocent smile plastered on her face. You stare at her for a few moments as she continues kissing your neck. “I don't appreciate your disobedience Minji”, You frowned at her, “Oh don't be such a party pooper, I did it for you remember?” You sighed. Of course there's nothing you can do now, you reap what you sow after all. 
“I need to go today, I have a business meeting to follow dad so don't make any trouble”, You decide to drop the subject for now, “Okay, don't come back home late oppa. Don't flirt with any girls okay?” She kissed your cheek before happily walking back to her bed. Something is up, she's been pretty calm after the wedding yet she has never been this calm. You went to meet your dad anyway, what's the worst that could happen? “What are you distracted with?” Your father immediately sees through you. “Minji is being off again, can you tell mom to watch over her?” He shook his head, “I swear to god the two of you are gonna drive me mad. Fine, I'll make her take care of her, now go and be ready for your presentation”, You leave Minji in the back of your mind for now. However problems arise when you finish the presentation and get a call from Mina.
“She's gone”, The first thing you think is that Minji has gone somewhere, then you realise, Mina was tasked to deal with Haewon, not Minji. “Haewon is gone?” It's Minji, of course it is, “Correct, I'm afraid it's your sister-girlfriend sir”, It seems like you might have grown a little too fast. “Fuck”
Tumblr media
Once you get home, you find Minji just chilling on the couch, acting clueless while she continues reading her book. The moment you walk in she smiles at you, “How was the meeting oppa?” You stare at her coldly, “Did you do it?” She raised her eyebrow, she's not very good at acting. Perhaps, she doesn't really try to hide it, maybe she got that one from you. “You need to be more specific oppa”, Since when is she this sassy, “Did you, clean up Haewon the same way you clean up your charming suitor”, She frowns a little hearing you call that side character a suitor. “I heard your tutor, Mina, can't seem to do her job properly. So I asked mom”, Aren't you proud? Your little girl is all grown up now.
“Mom can handle these problems better than dad?” Minji just shrugged, “Mom has her ways”, You smiled, my god you are proud of her. “Well, now all is well isn't it?” No, holy fuck no, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. You've never seen any proof, but Minji definitely has her twisted tendencies from someone. Who could it be? Could it be her mysterious dad? Or is it her mom, your mom? Could her mom…….. treat your mom as her Haewon? “Oppa? What's wrong? You're happy right? Now there's no one between us anymore”, Minji smiles as she hugs you, her eyes devoid of happiness. They're just inspecting your face in case there is any disapproval.
“What a fucked up finale”, That hits pretty close to home, “Hehehehe, now you're mine oppa, fully”, Minji's hand starts to unbuttoned your shirt. Her lips touched your neck before she sank her teeth deep into it. Look at her, look at what you've made, isn't she beautiful. “Fucking he'll Minji, you're a maniac”, You grunted as your hand grabbed her tits. “Ahhhhh, you love me because of that”, Minji moaned before she continued biting her neck. Her hand finished unbuttoning your shirt and started to unzip your pants. “Should we go to the bedroom first?” Your question was answered by her body that pushes you to the wall. 
Your pants fell off to the ground, her slender hands grabbed onto your cock as she pressed her lips onto yours. She let out moans as her hands are jerking you off. For once she took control of you. It felt good, didn't it? Having her hand aggressively jerk you off as her tongue is exploring your mouth. Your hand went under her sweater and started to fondle her breast, “Pinch it oppa”, She whimpered before continuing her exploration of your mouth. 
Her mouth then starts to lower down and kiss your neck, her hand starts to stroke you faster and faster. “Fuck Minji, you've become such a slut”, She giggled and stop bitting your neck, “I did it all for you oppa”, She whispered in your ears. “Fuck baby, I'm gonna cum”, The moment she heard you Minji immediately drop to her knees. She pulls your tip to her mouth as her hand strokes you even faster. “Fuck”, You let out a grunt as you cum into her mouth. “Mmmhhhmm~”, Minji let out a moan as she felt those thick warm cum starts to fill her mouth. Despite her best effort to swallow it all, some still manages to drip out of her mouth, forcing her to use her fingers to wipe it before licking them clean.
“There better be more oppa”, She looked at you using her puppy eyes as she licked her cum stained hands. “Hehehe, get on the couch baby”, Minji stood up and turned around, making sure to poke out her ass towards you. Minji gets on the couch, kneeling on it as her body leaned towards the backrest. “Come on oppa, fuck my ass please”, She wiggle her ass to invite you. You walk closer, your hand grabs her yoga pants before pulling them down, revealing her bare ass. “You're ready baby?” Your finger teases her tight entrance, “Oppa, just fuck me already, fill my ass up daddy”, Did she figure out your kink already? 
Your cock rests in between her cheeks, “You're so desperate already? Tell me first Minji, what did you do to Haewon?” You rubbed your cock between her ass making her feel frustrated. “Stop talking about her already, it's just you and me from now on. Forget about her, and just focus on me, daddy~”, Now how do you deal with her teasing? “Ahhhh, again daddy, spank me harder”, Well, spanking hasn't been a punishment for her anymore. You raised your hand and slapped her ass making her let out a moan, “I told you I got Haewon covered, but you just won't listen do you?” Minji bit her lips and nodded. 
“I can't wait any longer daddy, I hate her, I hate her so much. I want you, I want you to belong to me, forever. Fuck me already daddy, I can't wait for you any longer”, She whined as she wiggle her ass. “Bad girl”, You spank her again making her moan, “I hate it when you won't listen to me”, You spank her again. “I'm sorry daddy, but I can't let her take up a place in your mind anymore. You belong to me, now and forever”, She grunted. That's it, no more waiting, “Aggghhhh, fuck daddy”, Maybe you can penetrate her slower though. “Fucking slut”, You spanked her again making her moan, “Yeah, I'm your slut, fuck me harder daddy”
How is a gentleman supposed to say no to such a kind request? You pick up your pace and pound her even faster. Your hand grabbed on to her hair and pulled her up, “Ahhhhhh, fuck, you're so fucking big daddy, you're breaking me apart”, Minji is filled with ecstasy, and your cock. Your hips starts to live by itself, pounding her mercilessly as her ass jiggle from the impact and your spanking. “Fuck, fill me up daddy, pleaseee”, Her words sends you over the edge, you grunted and pull her hair even harder as you empty your load inside her. “Hhhmmm, that felt good daddy, hopefully you still have some more to give me because my pussy is still aching for you”, Minji moaned as you pulled out your dick, your cum started to overflow and dripped down her ass. 
You sit down on the couch next to her to catch your breath for a second, then Minji jumps on to your lap and starts stroking your cock. “I should stop drinking those pills oppa, because it's time to make you a real daddy”, She kissed you as your cock sprung back into action. “Hopefully, this time you didn't end up like the last girl I impregnate”, She smiled a little before leaning down and whispered in your ear, “Don't worry oppa, nothing will distract you ever again. It's just you, and me, now and forever”
407 notes · View notes
arcadia345 · 1 year
Text
Astro observations🌺
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
FYI I’m not a real astrologer, just my observations :) TW🔞
The cancer moon men I know are pretty chill and laid back + funny, but the women are so bitchy and moody😭 with a big sweet tooth
Every twin I know either has Gemini or Pisces placements
You ever meet someone and their neck just stands out for some reason added points if they smell good, most likely they’re a Taurus rising/ mars. Good example is Megan thee stallion her neck is so cute to me hehe
Aries in the chart can show you the things you were introduced to at a very young age, the early memories that you think of and say ‘That was wild lol’
3rd: could’ve started learning way before you started school(like flash cards and things) siblings and cousins, music, having access to electronics early
4th: erratic home life, the woman around you could be go getters
6th: could’ve got a lot of injuries when younger, probably couldn’t have a peaceful day even if you tried, bad experiences with animals
7th: domestic abuse, might have seen people having affairs, lots of disagreements between couples
12th:paranormal events, you could’ve had a lot of deja vu moments without even knowing, tend to have strong spiritual gifts,people having ill intentions towards you
Aquarius moon or degree/ moon in the 11th tend to have a “second mom” a person that treats them like their one of their own children, sometimes even better than their own mother does. 🌚
The people with mars in the first house I know have so many battle scars on their body
Moon/cancer in 3rd love changing their voices, and they have a bad habit of not telling the whole truth / white lies
Water sign on the descendent- people are always wondering what you’re up to, no matter how much you show them they’ll still wanna know what you’re hiding
Your first house correlates to how you came into this world, I have Chiron (ruled by Virgo) in my 12 conjunct my ascendant, uhm she said she almost d*ed having me😀 and I was a C-section baby. And the hospital did her so dirty(you know much they hate black women) they didn’t even stitch her back up correctly or drain her fluids and to this day she still has problems. The also gave her extra dosages of drugs just cause she’s a plus size woman- honestly I could go on and on but it really correlates with my cap rising and Neptune/Uranus in 1st
Mercury ☌ Sun, these people voices are just💋💋 they sound so sensual and unique ugh hard to explain it but 🥴 ex. Jungkook , Tupac
Gemini/ Libra in 2nd love collecting things like figurines makeup clothes candles plushies, could easily be a borderline hoarder tho
Ives noticed that sun in 10th have a strained relationship with their father, but their later years in life their relationship gets better, or not could really go either way, also could have money issues in their early years but ends up climbing the corporate ladder. It may take you a while to tho but just know it’ll be worth it in the end :) also they always stand out at their work place in some way, the coworker that you’re glad to see clock in at rush hour cause you know they gonna handle shit
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Venus- mercury positive aspects love giving out nicknames to their favorite people 🥺if they’re always calling you cute names just know they really care about you lol
Sag moons and degrees have no chill😀 like calm down bae sag anything tbh🚬
9th house ruler in the 11th could go to the same college with their old friends or could become very popular in the area they’re in, I think they’d make good bloggers
Air signs or degrees in 5th are trend setters.
Aquarius you inspire people, they could take things and make it into their own like art
With gemini here people will “copy & paste” ur looks. But no matter what it just looks like a knockoff version of what you did lmao it just never look as good as yours
Libra here people are very opinionated on how you express yourself either in a good way or bad, neither less you guys get a lot of compliments on your style
Every time I see a Capricorn rising with Neptune in the 1st it’s like their skin is see through and fragile😯makes sense tho since caps rule the skin and Neptune fogs things up. A good example is Ariana Grande her skin looks so delicate
Pluto/Scorpio in the 11th/11th house ruler in 8th, your friends could hate each other🤺 also they could have a rough life/childhood, trauma bonding or just experiencing traumatic events together is common here
Chiron in Aries (honestly any Aries placements it just depends on where it is), most people didn’t pay attention to them in their childhood in some way so they learned to be independent because of their lack of support cardinal things fr
That’s all for today! Give me a follow if you enjoyed💕
Tumblr media Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
semisgroupie · 7 months
Text
I SEE A REFLECTION OF MY SINS IN YOU
Tumblr media
priest!getou suguru x fem. reader
wc: 2.6k
warnings: HEAVILY sacrilegious, blasphemy, use of a Bible verse during sex, unprotected sex, creampie, piercings (pierced getou makes the brain go brr), light choking, oral sex (m!receiving), spit, mention of having sex in a church
synopsis: who said priests can’t have a little fun? just make sure they repent on sunday
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Maybe everyone was right. Maybe priests were one of the biggest hypocrites of them all.
They’re the people that everyone sees as the closest beings to god, the people that could save you from the fiery depths of hell, the people that could save your soul from eternal damnation and the people that are trusted among all. But maybe, just maybe, that’s not the truth. Maybe we should rip them down from that pedestal they’re atop of, maybe we should expose them for their sins and make them worry about the consequences of their actions.
Or maybe, we should let them continue to sin. At the end of the day, they are still going to church on Sunday, they are still repenting for their sins. Continue to let them be sinners especially when you benefit from it the most.
You have never been the sweet church girl your parents tried to raise you to be. Being innocent and complacent never appealed to you but when you were under your parents roof, you followed whatever rule book they laid out for you. There were moments where you disobeyed but only with minor things, sneaking out once they were asleep, coming back home past curfew reeking of alcohol and weed, making out with your boyfriend at the time in the church’s parking lot during Bible study.
Then once you moved out to college you were free to do whatever you wanted, and you did whatever your heart desired. Even to this day you still do as your heart desires. Which has led you to your current relationship, fuck buddy situationship, with the priest at your local church.
Suguru had joined the church almost a year ago due to the former priest falling ill. He immediately caught your attention and you immediately caught his. During his sermons, his eyes would scan the crowd until he could see you. Whenever you would visit him after mass for extra guidance, he was never able to hide the way his hungry eyes roamed your body, drinking in all of your curves like they were the last thing he would see.
After a month of being at the church, he couldn’t take it anymore. His fist was no longer satisfactory, he needed to feel your flesh against his, he needed his cock to delve into the warmth of your mouth and cunt, he needed you to be his salvation. So one Sunday morning, as he was picking up and organizing the Bible’s for morning mass he saw you standing at the entrance. A warm smile hiding devious intent graced his face as it did yours. You begged him for a quick confession, you needed to absolve yourself of the sins that plagued your mind and soul. He obliged, of course, what kind of priest would he be if he didn’t? He listened to your confession with open ears and by the time you were done, his cock ached and throbbed underneath his cassock. He couldn’t let you go away without doing something so he did something completely unorthodox and confessed to you, confessed how you’ve plagued his mind every night while he pumped his cock, how he so desperately wanted to bend you over one of the pews and fuck you senseless until you cried out his name like a prayer.
You took his words as some twisted sign from God. Then after mass you stood behind to fulfill both of your desires. He pulled you into the confessional booth and made you ride him while you recited some of the Bible verses he brought up during mass. The whole experience made you both crave more so you established a plan and schedule for regular hookups.
Today was the day that you two were supposed to meet up. You sat on the queen sized bed of the motel you two frequently went to and awaited his arrival. That’s how it would always go since today he had to conduct Bible study. Some time passed and you finally saw the door knob turn, he opened it and looked at you with a soft smile. “You look as beautiful as always, dear.” Your eyes scanned his body, he was wearing black slacks with a black button up and right at his neck was his clerical collar, you rolled your eyes at the sight of it as he closed the door and moved closer to you.
“If you keep wearing that to our little meetings then word will spread, Father. Imagine how bad it’ll be, the young priest that everyone has grown to love is the biggest sinner of them all.” You both knew nothing would happen. The motel was a few miles away from town and was just used as a rest stop for anyone on a road trip or truckers that needed somewhere to sleep for the night. Even the woman at the front desk didn’t care, as long as money would enter her pocket, she could care less about what happened behind the closed doors of her motel rooms. He chuckled at your words as he moved closer to you and took your chin between his thumb and index finger, “then I’ll just tell them you’re a temptress. You and I both know they’ll believe anything I say, my word is as good as God’s.” You fight the urge to roll your eyes again so instead you drop your head a little to take his thumb into your mouth and swirl your tongue around it before releasing it with a soft pop.
He groaned and felt his cock throb in his pants and leaned down to press his lips against yours in a lust-filled kiss. You lifted your hands to grab at his shirt as his tongue slipped into your mouth, the cool metal that decorated his tongue grazed against yours and made you moan against his lips. When you first found out about his many piercings, you were surprised to say the least. He was able to cover the ear piercings with his hair and somehow hid his tongue piercing from everyone and the piercings that surprised you the most were the four barbells that were tucked away in his pants.
His hands moved underneath your top and pulled it off of you rather roughly. You decided not to wear a bra and he immediately dove down to take your sensitive nipples into his mouth, he groaned as the taste of your skin hit his tongue and looked up at you as you began to thread your fingers through his dark locks. He released the bud from his mouth and dragged his tongue to the other before latching onto it to give it the same treatment. His cock throbbed and ached for release and soon he would grant himself the serenity, he just wanted to hear more beautiful sounds fall from your lips. You moaned his name and after a few moments he released your nipple and stood up.
“You have such a beautiful mouth, makes the most beautiful sounds. Now I want you to put it to work, okay?” He undressed himself, first his shirt, then his pants and briefs until you could finally see his rock hard cock.
It sprung out of its confines and slapped against his toned stomach and the silver piercings caught your eye. You licked your lips at the sight before sticking your tongue out to run it along the underside of his cock, feeling the metal that decorated it. Once you reached the head of his cock you wrapped your lips around it, suckling on it for a few moments before opening your mouth to take more of his cock in your mouth. He groaned and rolled his head back, “God granted me the gift of your sinful mouth and body. Oh how lucky am I.” He placed one hand on top of your head to guide your movements, moving you along his cock and trying to restrain himself from forcing you to take him entirely down your throat. Patience was a virtue he held dear, until he met you. He let you continue to take your time for a few more moments before shoving his cock down your throat, using both of his hands to keep you in place.
“That’s much better, a mouth like yours needs to be purged forcefully. Taking my time won’t do you any justice.” You felt his piercings along your tongue as he started thrusting into your mouth. The tip of his cock nestled in the back of your throat and his balls slapped against your chin with each thrust. You felt the burning ache between your thighs and you had to satiate yourself before you grow mad. So, you snaked one hand down and started to rub your clit, your moans vibrated along his cock and it made him twitch in your mouth. He bit his lip as he pulled out of your mouth completely, only a few strings of saliva connect you to the tip of his cock. He shuddered as the cold air hit his cock, since it was no longer basked in the warmth of your mouth and it craved more, he craved more.
“So, what are your plans now? Want to watch me pant and pleasure myself like a heathen? Or do you finally want to fuck me?” You bit your lip as your hand continued to rub quick circles along the swollen bundle of nerves, a low moan left your lips and his cock twitched again. He leaned down and hooked his hand under your arm, tugging you up from your position and pushing you on the bed so you’re bent over it. His hands moved along your plush thighs and moved up to push your flimsy skirt up, giving him a better view of your soaked panties. “You drive me crazy when you wear these little skirts to mass, always distracting me whenever you cross your legs. I remember the first time you surprised me by not wearing panties underneath, I almost choked on my spit when I saw this needy cunt, glistening under the lord’s light.” He hooked his lithe fingers underneath the waistband of your panties and pulled them down, tossing them to the side since they were no longer needed.
Your need grew with each passing second and you could feel yourself clench around nothing. You let out a low wanton whine, you were waiting for this all week and now that he was finally behind you, you couldn’t wait any longer. “Suguru, please — fuck!” Your whines were quickly replaced with a loud moan, he pushed himself into you so suddenly, your legs shook and your hands flew to the sheets, gripping them tightly in your fists. “No need to whine or complain, I was giving you what you wanted. I need this just as bad as you do, my sweet temptress.” He gripped your hips tight enough to bruise the skin and started to thrust, each drag of his cock along your walls was beyond blissful. His piercings rubbing along your walls made your toes curl. He first started off with slow thrusts despite his abrupt entrance inside you then began to thrust faster and harder.
Low grunts and groans left his lips while whines, mewls and cries left yours. It felt like angels were singing in his ears each time you cried out his name. He moved one hand up from your hips and brought it to your neck. He wrapped his hand around it and brought you up, making his cock hit even deeper. His mouth was pressed right against the shell of your ear, his breath fanning your skin before he started to speak. “You know, this reminds me of one of the verses we went over today in Bible study. Mind if I recite it to you?” You nodded dumbly at his words and he knew you couldn’t comprehend whatever he told you. “It's from the epistle of James, ‘But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.’ We have been tempted by each other and now engage in a constant ritual of sin, if God were to strike us dead right now, I’d die the most blissful death known to man. I think it's pretty ironic, I am a man who has devoted himself to God and I have planned to live a life free of sin, yet here I am, committing some of the worst sins known to man. I should be leading you away from temptation yet here I am, pushing you headfirst into the fiery depths.”
He snaps his hips into yours harder, almost animalistically and drags his tongue along the side of your neck. You bring one of your hands up and wrap it around his wrist, holding onto him as best as you can as he continues to fuck you senseless. Choked out gasps and moans leave you and you grip his wrist tighter and you edge closer and closer to an orgasm. “Gonna cum!” You gasped out and he moved his hand from the front of your throat to the back of your neck to push you down against the bed. Your cheek pressed against the soft fabric as he drills into you mercilessly. “Oh god! Oh fuck!” You babble out and tremble underneath him more, making him chuckle. “You should never use the Lord’s name in vain, especially during a time like this. But, I’ll just make sure you repent later during your confession. I think 10 hail mary’s while I’m edging you will do just fine, I’ll make sure you don’t cum until you say your last one. But for now, cum. Make a mess all over my cock and I’ll give you my own blessing and coat your insides in cum.”
He snaked his other hand down to rub your clit, finally sending you over the edge into your own paradise. A cry of his name paired with thank you’s left your lips as he fucked you through your orgasm. Tears pricked the corners of your eyes and threatened to spill and with a few more heavy thrusts from him, they finally ran. He continued to snap his hips into yours, greedily chasing his own release until he finally came inside of you. His cock twitched as heavy spurts of cum flooded your cunt. If you weren’t on birth control then you were sure that you would’ve been bearing his child. He released his grip on the back of your neck and leaned down to pepper kisses along your spine and shoulder blades as he came down from his high.
Heavy breaths left the both of you and he slowly pulled out to drop on the bed beside you. He opened his arms to let you cuddle close to him and he wrapped his arms around you. You both basked in the comfortable silence before he finally spoke, “I know it’ll sound cheesy but I am thankful that God put us in each other’s paths. You’ve made priesthood much more enjoyable.” You smile at his words and press a few kisses along his chest before lifting yourself up to press your lips against his. “It is cheesy but I am thankful as well. It’s not everyday where you get the chance to fuck the hot priest.” You laughed as he shook his head and pinched your side. You swatted his hand away and rested your chin on his chest, taking a strand of his hair between your fingers to twirl it. He watched you with a smile on his face while his fingers danced along your skin.
You were both convinced that in some twisted way, you were meant to be together like this, you were both meant to indulge in sin and then use prayers to cleanse your souls. It was in your nature to sin and why go against nature and God’s wishes?
Tumblr media
taglist: @coffee-on-a-rainyautumn @hellsingalucard18 @suyacho @cherrykamado @satmitsuplanet @benkeibear @watyousayin
Tumblr media
404 notes · View notes
icaruspendragon · 4 months
Note
\⁠(⁠°⁠o⁠°⁠)⁠/you're aspec too!!! (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠) I love finding other fellow asexuals!!!
it’s actually been a rather recent discovery for me. because while i’ve known about asexuality since i was like 14, my understanding of it was pretty superficial until about a year or so ago.
during college i’d hear my friends talking about sex and how great it was or i’d read in fanfic about how it was this incredibly pleasurable thing and be like “hm. that is not how i feel during it but maybe i just haven’t been with the right partner.” but i’d had a couple enjoyable experiences, so the possibility of being aspec simply did not cross my mind. especially as i grew more comfortable and confident in my bisexuality. while i know it’s flawed now, my line of thinking at the time was, “i can’t be ace because im bi.”
i think it was hard for me to figure it all out because sex was always fine, it was just seldom to never something i thought to do unless it’s what my partner wanted. like i didn’t mind it. but apparently lots of people enjoy it a great deal and want to initiate it on their own. i’ve never really been one of those people.
and it was easy to write off/ignore for a long time as i thought my lack of want to have sexual encounters had to do with trauma/mental illness, but as i worked through and processed it all, my desire (or lack there of) stayed the same.
so it’s really only been within the past few months of somewhat frantic googling and discussions with people who are ace that i realized all signs were pointing to aspec. i mean all signs have been pointing there for a while. just look at this text i sent my friend scott back in 2021.
Tumblr media
but i didn’t have the words/label to adequately describe what i’ve always felt. like i can’t tell you how many trips i made to the gynecologist to try and “figure out” what was “wrong” with me. but now i know there’s nothing wrong with me. i just don’t really feel sexual attraction. and that’s okay!! i’m not broken or damaged or whatever thoughts i had from like ages 19-25 about sex and my relationship with it were telling me.
the aspec label itself is one that i’ve only felt comfortable using for the past few weeks, but it definitely feels like the right one. even though having a name for it is a recent thing for me, i’ve always felt this way.
370 notes · View notes
aritany · 1 month
Text
On Identity: The Truth
Content warnings: homophobia, transphobia, references to self harm and suicide.
I’ve been keeping secrets my whole life.
I’m 10 and I’m listening to my dad at the dinner table, who I know to be the most trustworthy person in the world. He talks about the legalization of marriage between two people of the same sex and asks us to consider the implications. Where do we draw the line in the sand? Legalizing gay marriage paves the way for legalizing pedophilia, after all. If a union between two men or two women isn’t disrespecting the sanctity of marriage, what’s next? Marriage between men and animals?
I’m 11 the first time I hear it: “It doesn’t matter how low I set the bar for you, you still can’t reach it.”
I’m confused and afraid—I’m trying so hard—but I hear it then, and again, and again, spoken low in disappointment, shouted with a vein popping in her forehead, cold like a fact, and it sinks in, bone deep.
I’m 12 with my first crush on a girl. I’m not confused, I know that’s what it is—I want to kiss my friend, and I already know not to talk about it. Never to talk about it. It isn’t safe.
I’m 13 and doubting. I throw myself into fitting in. I pick the right boys to like and I go overboard, and I do like them, I do, I do, I want them to like me, I want to be their friend. I want to be their equal, but that’s not quite how the story goes, so I settle for trying to hold hands with somebody I desperately crave respect from, but that’s wrong too, I learn. 
I’m 14 and convicted. How could this be wrong? I brush hands with a girl in choir and we meet eyes and I know. I watch a gay kiss on TV and I sob into my hands and I tell no one, no one, no one.
I’m 15 and I come out to my mom, haltingly, with the terminology that I have, because the thought of hiding forever—keeping quiet through one more dinner—kills me.
She tells me no. She tells me I’m wrong.
I look in her eyes and I understand: it’s not an option, and it never will be.
I’m 15 and I do my best to stop there.
It doesn’t work.
I’m 16 when I first hear my mom say that you can love someone and not approve of their lifestyle. I wonder what kind of love that is. I wonder how that kind of diluted, half-hearted, patronizing love can be enough for anyone. I wonder if she’s thought about how that feels, to be told that who you are—not by choice—is fundamentally wrong.
I’m 16 and a boyfriend is a shield. The right choice, so I make it, and it’s even almost fun. I love being his friend. I’m afraid of anything more.
I’m 17 and my youngest sibling whispers, “So am I.”
My heart breaks for the pain they’ll experience, as they too are taught, painstakingly, how to hate themself. Which parts of themself have to be kept hidden, which parts are shameful. They sit at that dinner table and hear the rhetoric that pushed me to the brink and over it, and I hope they’re stronger than I am.
They aren’t.
I’m 18 and my mom works at a college for the performing arts. I sit and curdle quietly while she talks about her genderqueer students. Misgenders them behind their backs. Deadnames used flippantly. She knows better, after all. She can be the expert on somebody else’s identity. They’re mentally ill, all of them. None of them are happy. They’re searching for something only God can provide.
I’m 19 and I come out as bisexual to the man I’m certain I’m going to marry, tearing the secret out like a bandage fused to skin. He tells me of course it’s fine, that he supports who I am. Of course people like me should have rights, of course. I laugh, relieved. Later, I find out this moment was almost a dealbreaker for him, and I wonder how much was ever real.
I’m 20 and I’m out. I’m 20 and I’m free. I’m 20 and I believe, because I’ve been told, that I am loved for who I am. All of who I am. I still flinch when I hear a car door slam.
I’m 21 and I’m searching for the connection to my womanhood. I’m searching for what makes a woman a woman. I’m reading gender theory and talking to friends around the world and wondering exactly what it is that I’m missing.
What does the rest of the world know that I don’t?
I’m 22 when my marriage ends because my body might not be attractive to my husband one day, and my parents email him in support and solidarity, expressing sympathy, and I’m not surprised.
I’m 22, and standing up for who I am has cost me everything. A spouse, two sets of parents, financial security, a city’s worth of community, more childhood friends than I can count. My parents tell me to go back in the closet so my ex-husband will love me. To them, his frustration is understandable, of course—by presenting androgynously, I’m betraying my marriage vows, after all.
I wonder, stunned into silence, where I promised to look like a woman.
I’m 23 when I come out to my parents for the third time; not as bisexual, not as trans, but as hurt. 
I lay out the pain of the last decade as succinctly as I can, hoping they’ll hear. When I assert that yes, to be in relationship with me, use of my name and pronouns is a requirement, my mother jokes, “Well, we don’t negotiate with terrorists.”
It’s not a joke.
I see the flash in her eyes, the instant regret as she laughs it off like it’s funny, but it isn’t.
The kid sitting at the dinner table knows it’s not a joke. The kid who listened to countless lectures on the morality of queerness knows it’s not a joke. The kid who stood with shaking hands and tried to bleed out the bad knows it’s not a joke. Years of casual bigotry taught me how to hate myself, which parts of myself I should cross out and ignore, which parts of myself I should be ashamed of.
I’m 23, and I have finally unlearned shame, and when I ask my parents to see me, the joke is that I’m a terrorist. I’m unreasonable.
The shock of it becomes a balm, later on.
Some jokes aren’t funny.
Some jokes aren’t jokes at all.
I’m 24 and I’m learning that it’s scary to be alone. Bigotry made me an orphan and made us strangers, and knowing that it’s the right choice to stand up for myself doesn’t make it any easier. I’m learning the only way out is through, if you’re not squeamish:
Cut off the part of yourself that’s 7 years old standing outside of their bedroom because the nightmare had teeth and claws and they are the heroes that will hold you close and make it warm again.
Amputate.
Cauterize.
Don’t let them see you bleed.
I’m learning that the wound takes a long, long time to close.
I’m 25 as I write this, and I am proud of who I am, even if I’m still bleeding. All of who I am. It’s taken a long time for me to let that person see the sun, but here we are, basking in the glow. Those wounds are healing. I am visible for everyone else who whispers, “So am I.”
Your sunshine will come. Your sunshine will come. 
Your sunshine will come.
224 notes · View notes