#im going to cry on the floor now
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i dnt know what to do with myself when iim not writing?? what am i suppose to do?? i was trying to let ideas rotate and develop for a bit but....what do i do with myself. what else is there???i. dont know ☹️
#help i am lost and confused ☹️☹️☹️#maybe ....ill write random shit anyway#and let the other wip rotate while doing new things? i dont knowwwwwwwwww#im going to cry on the floor now#sixdemon los hella sad tiempos#also failed the 'is that chocolate frosting or a mole' test bc my hands are shaking too much from.. things. and i got it everywhere#this is a very distressing day and it started at 3am and has only gone downhill since
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I need more scenes of them just dancing please and thank you
#more MORE I SAY#they are so gghHHG H GG#YA KNO???#im so normal about them I swear#so so so normal#i bought the new figures and now they sit on my desk holding hands teehee#i can't wait for the next chapter as well seriously OMG#screaming crying rolling around on the floor#i need people to chat to about STL i am going crazy#i am FESTERING the parasites in my brain can't cope#somebody pls yell at me about STL im dying over here#skip and loafer#skip to loafer#mitsumi iwakura#shima sousuke#shima x mitsumi
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AND I'M DONE
(don't worry he's just missing his angel)
#i can't stop snuggling or petting him#he's just sooooo cute 😭#but he keeps falling on the floor#and im taking much delight on going “oh crowley”#but then my mouth continues on its own accord and goes#“nothing lasts forever”#and we both start crying#I LOVE HIM#now i have to make him an aziraphale don't i#good omens#crochet
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my sweet little baby man is no longer with us
#he had his bloodwork done yesterday and the vet said it was fine but he doesnt have much time left#and my bestie is a vet tech who wanted to see the lab results bc she always does and she looked at them#and asked me if she can shiw them to her boss today and i was like sure and immediately knew something was up#today keekki was being himself#then i went to run some errands and when i came back he was laying in front of the front door with his tiny baby head against it#and i was like ''oh ok one of his seizures?''#and theyre like. keekki will drool and not move and they usually last for like 20 minutes (several vets have no idea whats up with those#but it was probably either a kidney or a blood pressure thing)#anyways. it did not pass in 20 minutes so i Knew#i laid on the floor next to him#then my bff sent me a message asking me if i have the time to talk about keekki and its not good news#at this point i was about to call the vet anyways#and she was like ''ok i showed these to my boss (a vet) and she got super angry that ur vet even let you leave the clinic''#bc apparently keekkis bloodwork was so bad he should have been put down then and there but my vet was like a fresh half graduate#so i dont hold it against her. anyways i got an euthanasia appointment for this evening and spent the time before it laying on the couch#crying with keekki in my arms#i had to carry him bc he couldnt really walk without stumbling and falling down#when i had to get up to get his carrier and stuff ready he was taking a nap on the couch where i left him and i took this pic#anyways worst vet visit of my life i could hardly even do anything but nod half the time bc speaking results in me sobbing#anyways. this fucking sucks#i dont know how ill be able to sleep tonight#its been years since i last slept at home without having a little guy plop into my arms#i spent a long time with him in the vet room when he was gone#it feels surreal ive given him his last ever forehead kisses#as i left the room i told him bye the exact same way ive been saying bye to him for the last very many years ive had him#its always moikka keekki before i go to work or the store or literally anything#and that was my last moikka keekki#i hope he felt how loved he was#my dad is sending me older pics of me and keekki and he looks so happy in them. hes always right next to me#idk man im going to stop rambling now
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HE'S VERY REAL AND HE CAN HURT ME PLEASE !!!!!!!!!!!
++++++++++++++++++ Trauma
#yeah anyways the new superman show basically gutted my husband#JHBERFBJJEBRHFJHBERBJFEJBRHF#MY CHILDHOOD CRUSH#HE GOT TWUNKIFIED#INERFJHERBJFJBERFBJ#NO ONE TOUCH ME IM#IM SO#IM SO DISTRAUGHT RIGHT NOW#THEY GUTTED MY OLD MAN#yeah anyways i had to draw this out because hBJREBFHJJERF IM LEGITIMATELY TRAUMATISED RIGHT NOW#IM LEGITIMATELY GOING THROUGH IT#i have so many things to say and none of them are good#JHBREBFBJHERBFHBERFBHJERFRBHJFBJHERF#nevermind me im crying on the floor#hakudean rambles#yes haku as well cause he also has a major crush on slade#AND THEN ITS FUCKIN RUINED!!!!
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JUST started a good Durge playthrough and I'm dying over my absolute little guy bard Tinfoil.
#bg3#bg3 tav#baldurs gate 3#(Im a tag rambler so theres a lot here-) he's got voice six and because of that I'm opting he's incredibly INCREDIBLY young#like- probably 9? Dragonborn reach 10 year old human size at 3 for them so. yeah-#human-body wise he's about 17? but he's still got so little thoughts in his head. Which is canon as well at least#not gonna romance ANYONE as Tinfoil but we're gonna all be besties.#still deciding if he'll slurp tadpoles. he gives into peer preassure very easily and is very easily bossed around.#so it depends at the moment in the cutscene i guess.#he's the group kid. i think shadowheart would mother him a lot and he looks up to Karlach A SHITTON. 'She's so cool...'#'why is the group kid the leader?'#everyone shrugs but they see Tinfoil curl up around a small pile of gold and gems as he sleeps and they can't say no to what he wants to do#Lae'zel thinks he's 'extremely weak skinned. and needs all the help a pathetic youngling like him can get'#she says; helping said pathetic kid up off the nautaloid ship floor after he ran ahead to try and get to the controls; listening to her#like a good lil guy#'Tinfoil; darling; you know we can always get *more* gold if you give up some of these precious little rubies and opals. Your hoard#will look *much* more impressive that way.'#-Astarion; trying to convince a now-teary-eyed tinfoil to give up his hoard so the party can buy health potions#'its not...its not impressive?' he starts crying and Shadowheart has to comfort him#I KNOW he's gonna go murder mode and stuff. but everyone at camp thinks it's just dragonborn instincts kicking in#so they just like chain him to a tree for the night.#its funny i think#'NO! BAD TINFOIL! STOP TRYING TO EAT THE BIRDS!'#'Raughguguhguguh. Tinfoil *NEEDS* sauce...'#he is on a leash constantly because he is enamoured with the beauty of the world and runs off- but also to not kill and maim constantly.
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Brb gotta just yell into the void
#GOD IM JUST#so both Q and I were under the impression we would be getting help fixing the place#almost a full week later#it’s basically just been me his elderly grandma and him when hes not working#which is very little time since he’s full time#I have been working on this place from basically sunrise to sunset#doing what I can to make it clean and repaint#but I can’t do most repairs#mainly what the bathroom needs#but today#ooooooo today#Q’s parents are getting on our nerves man#we’ve been trying to explain that the bathroom is not functional in it’s current state#and instead of Q’s father#the landlord of this place who decided keeping it while living two and a half hours away was a smart idea#helping to fix said bathroom#says he’d rather work on the living room floor which is the lowest priority#and when we expressed this to them#his mother goes#if you don’t like it you can go live somewhere else#EXCUSE ME#I have literally been spending all the time I can trying to fix up YOUR place for you two#to the point where I am now coming down with a cold and my lowing back is killing me#where Q is sacrificing every free moment he has trying to do what he can while working a full time job#and THIS is the thanks we get???????#what the hell#anyway they’re coming tomorrow but Q has work so I am going to cry#I am so exhausted and stressed if they pull some shit I might just do something I shouldn’t#I want this to be over#the second were able to afford a house we’re getting the hell out of here
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so it was all intentional huh.
im being plagued by realizations i have already had before. it was all intentional this scene took a whole day to film it was all intentional all intentional all intentional
oh my fucking god the realization is setting in finally. holy fucking shit. im gonna think about this for as long as humanly possible.
#stranger things#byler#will byers#mike wheeler#im losing my fucking mind im so fuckfing normal#ill need 3 to 5 business days to recover from this#its nothing i didnt know but having the confirmation. just. feels different.#im gonna shut up now and go curl up on the floor and maybe cry#frankie says things
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You vs Ivan WHO WILL WIN THE FIGHT FOR TILL’S AFFECTION???
(Spoiler Alert: it’s Mizi)
DONT EVEN JOKE ILL START CRYING (me trust..)
#ngl i think I could oneshot Ivan with a few words for thought and he'd be on the floor r6 style but Mizi??? this is cruel#id still shoot my shot tho#would I be left on the sidewalk in the middle of the rain begging for one chance. well. probably. BUT IM STILL GONNA TRY#trust i could rizz him🙏#now im going to go back to my corner...and cry
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#tumblr user ratatatastic found crying on the kitchen floor#please dont speak or look at me right now i will evaporate you with my eyes#trying times indeed#hey man i wanted to be normal tonight but thanks for ruining that 👍#im gonna go out and start gnawing on peoples legs if youll excuse#might start hysyerically howling too#you know#for funsies
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monachan haul has arrived ✨safely✨
#ft. the gigo collab merch that i had proxied s o b s#‘how many albums did you buy m y g o s h’ j-just these 3…#thanks delivery guys for not notifying me when haul pt 2 was delivered lmao now my mother’s mad at me for not showing her what i got :(#‘just show her man’ d u d e she’ll lecture me about wasting my money— wait nvm i’ll show her my lls gk dvd that came in maybe that’ll help#im gatekeeping monachan from my fam idc if we’re related y’all c a n ’ t have her#b u t on another note the mona album standee looks really cute beside the new sena natsukomi standee#mona looks taller than sena in it but they just. look really cute next to each other aaaaa#though. yk. speaking of the gigo merch and stuff… man. i think i went to that arcade last year lmao#i didnt go up to the floor with the food and stuff since i was only there to play crane games and i was too lazy to climb the stairs#but seeing posts about the collab reminds me of the 1000 yen i spent trying to get ena pjsk nui in the mzen crane machine#i had. like. 4000 yen at the time and around 1/4 of it went to that machine… never forgive never forget#‘why didnt you withdraw more money then’ w e l l the debit card was with my bro and i broke off from the family to explore by myself s o—#and that was how i spent my birthday last year. on the 4th or 5th (cant rem) floor of gigo trying in vain to get enananui#that doesnt have anything to do with monachan but i needed to cry about it somewhere ig lmfao#m a n. what am i even doing with my life lmao#o k that’s enough of being annoying for one night see y’all for daily nagisa in a few hours byeeeeeeee
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most days i can power through and ignore the physical and psychological pain and discomfort having a skin condition causes but some days it hits me all at once how much of a toll it actually takes on my whole life... today is one of those days apparently 🤠 wuhoo
#/vent#it's not been getting any better for far too long now i'm gonna have to go to the doctors about it again#which is devestating actually because all my experiences with doctors about my eczema have been disappointing#but i have a game plan this time im going to curl into a ball on the floor and scream and cry in front of them#and eat their pen whole pelican style if they try to write me a prescription instead of referring me to a dermatologist#it was bad enough before it migrated to my face but genuinely i cant live like this anymore
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um hello again hk community <3
I AM NOT BEATING THE KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR ALLEGATIONS .....
thank you to the number one superfan bestie @lovinglin for enabling me so bad she made hollow x ivie content faster than I did <3 please follow her <3
#WHERE DO I START WITH THIE#WHERE DO I START WITH THIS#the unpredictable events that unfolded after i uploaded that jil fights thk battle 💔💔💔💔💔#AKSJHDJSJSS MAN WHERE DO I START#HOLLOW IS SUCH . A WILD CARD#i didnt expect myself to like them i swear.....#bjt... it just happened.#coupled that with the ABSOLUTELY TRAGIC LORE THEY HAVE????? I CSN FIX THEM GUYS I CAN FI#BFBDBDHGDGDGDHDRD I AM SO INSANE ABT THEM <3#i initially didn't want to pair ivie with hollow but after i confessed this to lara. IMMEDIATELY DREW THESE TWO WITHOUT A CARE AND I EXPLODE#SHIT HAPPENED SO QUICK AND NOW IM SO UEUEUUEUE OVER THEM#these drawings are like half of a week old#WELL WHATEVER 💔💔💔#shrhfmfkssj eermrmtb yes anyways I Like them So much#i wouldn't be surprised if like half of my mutuals guessed this because HALF OF THEM PROBABLY FOLLOWED MY MAIN BLOG AND GO INSANE#NOT MAD DW I JUST FIND IT HILARIOUS#anyways ujuhm im rolling on tje floor and crying they dont deserve pain and sadness only happy ness and uh Flower a Nice Flower#also hollow is canonically genderless so i just simply go they them but i also dont mind he him either ahehe#STILL. THRY ARE SO GORGEOUS<3#~ art#idk if i should tag this or not LMAO
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...
#oh lads. its not looking good for my genomics exam on Thursday. its all fucked#i dunno. its just been a weird day. bc one of my lab mates is getting ready to go to the astr0biology science conference#and its just so wild how i got here. into the perfect position. i have a great advisor. a great phd project. a committee member who is super#integrated with n4sa astr0biology projects. and so many of the instructors are amazing. my genomics prof is terrifyingly smart#so is my advisor and his wife. and the program is great. ecology and Evolution. its perfect. its all perfect#and yet. and yet. it just feels like its all falling apart. ive lost that compulsive thing thats always set in my chest#and now all i want to do is lay on the floor and cry and sleep and not do anything. why am i so tired?#its just so frustrating. and im sure ive got the most wretched vibes bc im constantly like 1 comment away from bursting into tears#like 2 weeks and its done. then im off to find a summer job. and find a long term job. and consider throwing away everything ive ever worked#toward. just let it all burn. im so tired. and i dont get to see my therapist until Monday. thats gonna b fun#hi. hello. since last i saw you my life has crumbled into pieces. ugh. i just dont wanna fail this genomics exam but it looks like that's#where we're headed. maybe i should have just dipped out of these last 3 weeks. but no. i didnt want to leave the lady i ta for 100 lab#reports to unexpectedly have to grade 4 days before grades are due. ugh. itll b fine. i mean it wont but whatever#unrelated
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Good fucking lord I was fighting for my LIFE on the goddamn toilet 😵 bitch I thought I was gonna die for real
#marquilla#an hour. i was on there for an HOUR what the fucking hell man#i was praying i was crying i was doing that toilet yoga thing i was fucking begging my body to just fucking go 😭#i was like fuck it im getting up and making miralax and my body was like hmm i think now i wanna go for real :) so i had unstirred miralax#and juice mixture in hand as i ran back 😵 bitch... it was bad#poop talk#tmi i know but i thought i was really gonna die and that they'd find me face down ass up slumped to the floor with poop halfway stuck out my#ass like 😵😵😵😵 good fucking god#i was like 'i dont fucking care if this rips me hole to hole just get it OUT' oh god#worst of all was that i went like a gazillion times Tuesday no problem and today youd have thought it had been a month in between
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Hot girls are having a breakdown because of not being able to draw their blorbo. Im the hot girl
#crying my eyes out laying on the floor squeezing things in my arms#it's no joke i dont know how to fucking release my anger and disappointment.#i wanted to draw today and my tablet stopped working! again!!!#now im angry sad disappointed and not sure ehat to do with myself nothing is really helping and nobody's here for me👍#fuck it#i just wanted to draw moist von fucking Lipwig#it's not the same on the paper + now i dont want to do anything even read even talk i don't want anything#even sleep tho it's almost midnight and i should go to sleep. im too full of emotions and want to cry so bad i feel baaad and alloone#vent#>: [
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