#im so weak for him being awful in the sweetest way.

[korpuskat]

Thinking about ramattra being obsessive again. Like trying so hard to convince you, giving you as much allowance as he can, ("go ahead, order whatever you want", "are you hungry? Here's a whole menu") and it's just so hard to say no to him. Because he's from the bottom of his synthetic heart nice to you, even when he's angry you won't look him in the eyes anymore, or that you flinch away, all the anger is directed at himself. Not you, never you. And eventaully you just get worn down enough, fast forward a few weeks and your cuddling, and when did you start smiling at him? Just being so weak for him, he's genuinly kind to you, trying to protect you by his own destruction

YESSSS Ramattra who is just SO in love with you and tries to show you it ALL the time, giving you everything he can. Isn't he so kind, so sweet, so loving? Despite his controlling nature, he's never hurt you- and he could've, shouldn't you appreciate that?

And ugh just that slow descent from "No, I'm not interested" to "I can tolerate it... just to keep him quiet" to "When are you coming back? I miss you."

[ssprayberrythings]

our little secret | CL16

charles x female!reader / smau fic 

this was a request so thank you anon for providing the idea, i changed some of the detailing ever slightly to fit it more into the social media format but overall i followed the request so i hope i did it justice! 

as a bit of a background: you and charles have been together for a few years now, but nobody knows because they’ve kept their relationship secret from the f1 community and private from anyone who follows you. everything is going great until photos of you and charles on vacation get leaked. normally you’d deny it or ignore it but it was very obviously charles in the pictures which cause fans to go crazy, wanting to know everything ultimately resulting in you and charles deciding to go public and hoping for the best. oh and the request included having other drivers on the grid having gone through recent breakups which was another reason charles liked that your relationship was private. 

warnings: none, just pure fluff and charles being a simp for his girlfriend !! 

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yourusername posted on their instagram   

yourbestfriend, yoursister, user23 & others liked 

life recently ⭐️🫶🌸

view all comments 

user1: y/n i still cant believe we haven’t figured out who your partner is, its been atleast a couple years 

user2: at this point, i don’t even care who it is, as long as she’s happy 

yoursister: awe the flowers, he’s the sweetest 

╰ yourusername: i know ! 

user22: one day we’ll find out…i hope 

╰ user17: we can only hope 

yourbestfriend: i love that youre happy but i don’t enjoy third wheeling, does he have any single friends he can atleast bring along 🥲

╰ yourusername: sorry..pretty sure all his close friends are in relationships 🫣

charles_leclerc posted on their instagram 

f1fan, pierregasly, landonorris, fanofleclerc & others liked 

who do i give these flowers too 

view all comments 

fanofleclerc: YOU CAN GIVE THEM TO ME 

f1fan: ILL TAKE THEM OFF YOUR HANDS CHARLES 

user30: how is this man single ???? he’s so boyfriendcoded 

landonorris: i’d prefer literally anything else but i guess you can give them to me 

╰ charles_leclerc: ill pass 

f1: we’ll take them for you charles, im sure someone in the paddock would like them 

-

yourusername posted on their story  

caption: he loves me i swear..😉

*replies disabled*

charles_leclerc posted on their instagram 

pierregasly, landonorris, f1, f1fan, charlesleclercfan_ & others liked 

enjoying the sun whenever i can 

view all comments 

fanofcharles: hes so beautiful wow 

charlesleclercfan_: imagine running into charles leclerc while he’s shirtless? id pass away

pierregasly: photo creds would be nice..

╰ charles_leclerc: you didn’t take the photo ? 

╰ pierregasly: yes but i was behind the camera offering support, its basically the same thing 

f1fan: pierre and charles’ friendship is top tier

╰ liked by f1

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yourusername posted on their instagram   

yoursister, yourbestfriend, user20 & others liked 

me and everyone’s favourite man hit the town 🍸

view all comments 

yourbestfriend: its giving old money, i love it 

╰ liked by yourusername 

user20: im sure whoever he is, is a gorgeous man 

user12: i may not know who he is but i aspire for these vibes 

yoursister: the hand placement is everything 

╰ liked by yourusername & yourbestfriend 

user44: whoever he is, he was raised right, that hand placement says everything and him holding y/n’s heels, god has favourites 

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charles_leclerc posted on instagram 

charlesleclercfan_, f1, f1fan, landonorris & others liked 

hikes at sunset > 

view all comments 

charlesleclercfan_: omg charles 

charlesleclercfan_: i think my heart just stopped 

f1fan: he knows what he’s doing, he has to 

user33: brb finding the strength cause this photo makes me weak 

user2: he looks so happy 

yourusername posted on their instagram   

yourbestfriend, user22, user14, user7 & others liked 

my two favourite people 🫶

tagged: @yourbestfriend 

view all comments 

user2: mystery man once again

user14: the way they go on runs together 

yourbestfriend: the only time i’ll gladly be a third wheel..i love a good walk/run at sunset 

╰ yourusername: i know how much you love your sunset runs 

user12: couples that run together, stay together 

╰ liked by yourusername 

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yourusername posted on their story  

caption: my whole 🌎 

*replies disabled*

-

yourbestfriend posted on their story

caption: i once again find myself third wheeling..@yourusername

╰ yourusername: atleast you could walk away when you wanted..

╰ yourbestfriend: not the point..but tell charles thank you for paying for me aswell

╰ yourusername: will do 😅

charles_leclerc posted on their story

caption: enjoying some local art before racing starts again  

*replies disabled* 

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yourusername posted on their instagram  

yoursister, yourbestfriend, user3, user15 & others liked 

gonna miss watching the sunrise in the morning and the sunset in the evening with you 🥺

view all comments 

user3: wait where is he going 

user23: awe, i hope everything’s okay and they haven’t broken up

╰ user4: i think mystery man has to leave, but they’re still together 

yourbestfriend: mom and dad..fr 

╰ liked by yourusername 

user44: wherever mystery man has to go, i hope he comes back soon 

“Merci mon amour” You smiled as he situated himself next to you in bed. Having been dating now for almost 3 years, you had picked up on french terms and were able to have small conversations only speaking French with Charles 

“I posted you on instagram” you told him as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders pulling you closer into him but being careful not to spill the drink in your hands 

“Oh what did you post? My phones charging” he explained as you unlocked your phone and showed him the post you made for him “You’re now being referred to as mystery man” you chuckled. 

Out of all the names people had given him throughout the years, this was definitely your favourite. Charles also chuckled when he heard the name that was given to him 

“Can I ask you something?” Charles asked after a few seconds of comfortable silence passed between the two of you 

“Of course, what’s up?” you asked after taking a small sip of your tea “Do you ever think about going public with our relationship?” He followed up 

You turned to face him fully “Of course, mon amour but we both agreed it was better this way” You reiterated the promise you made early on in your relationship 

“I know but I hate that I cant comment on your posts or even post you myself” he sighed “I want to keep you safe but I also want the whole world to know you’re mine and I’m yours” he finished. 

“I know it’s not fair” you exclaimed while running your fingers through his hair, something you did for him when he was stressed or feeling anxious “I love you all the time though regardless if you post me or not you know that. Right?” You asked him 

“Of course I do” he told you in response closing his eyes feeling relaxed “One day we’ll go public. Im making you that promise” he told you opening his eyes again 

You smiled at him “Sounds like a beautiful promise” you responded, leaning in to kiss his cheek “As much as I would love to spend the rest of the night talking with you, you have to be at the airport early tomorrow” you reminded him as you stopped playing with his hair, to turn and put your mug on the bedside table next to your side of the bed, Charles putting his own mug on the table next to his side 

“Im gonna miss you” he told you when you were both situated in bed, the only source of light coming from the evening sky outside “Not as much as I’m gonna miss you” you told him, snuggling into his side while his arm pulled you closer to him. 

Even if you had been dating for awhile, the start of the race season was always a struggle, neither of you wanting to be apart for long periods of time but it was moments like these that you held close and savoured until the next time you could be this close again. 

-

yourusername posted on their story  

caption: my happy place 🎨

╰ charles_leclerc: babe i miss you already and its only been a few days 

╰ yourusername: i know but soon you’ll be busy with media events, qualifying, racing and the time will go by quicker, i promise my love 

╰ charles_leclerc: facetime tonight so i can see your beautiful face ? 

╰ yourusername: of course ❤️ 

yourusername posted on their story  

caption: now whose third wheeling..😠 @yourbestfriend 

╰ yourbestfriend: oh hush up, this was only one time compared to how many times i third wheeled you and driver boy 

╰ yourusername: okay fair point…also driver boy? wait till i tell charles that one 😂

more replies..

╰ charles_leclerc: omg since when did y/bf/n get a boyfriend? i want all the details 

╰ yourusername: i’ll tell you everything on our facetime call, its a pretty cute story of how they met 

╰ charles_leclerc: okay but not as cute as when we met? right? 

╰ yourusername: oh never, we have the ultimate cutest first meet story 🤭

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charles_leclerc posted on their instagram  

f1, carlossainz55, scuderiaferrari, landonorris & others liked 

feels good to be back 🏎️ 

tagged: @scuderiaferrari 

view all comments 

scuderiaferrari: looking forward to a great season ! 

╰ liked by charles_leclerc 

f1fan: HE LOOKS SO WELL RESTED AND HAPPY, FERRARI YOU BETTER DO CHARLES JUSTICE THIS SEASON 

f1: as if we weren’t already excited for the new season !!

╰ liked by charles_leclerc 

charlesleclercfan_: IM SO EXCITED 

charlesleclercupdates: THIS IS HIS SEASON, I CAN ALREADY FEEL IT 

Charles was standing with the other drivers, whenever the new season started they always had to do a bunch of media and although some drivers may hate how childish some of the antics were, overall it’s always a nice time getting to be in the same place as everyone and not be competing for once. 

Charles turned to George and Pierre who were in conversation with Carlos and Lando. Somehow they had gotten on the topics of relationships, Lando having told everyone that the girl he was seeing at the end of the previous season before the break, wasn’t in the picture anymore. 

“Aw mate I’m sorry” Charles told him “Its okay, we weren’t anything serious” Lando told him, seeming to be completely fine with the outcome. “Carlos how are you and your lady?” Lando asked Carlos taking the attention off of him 

“Ehh, its alright” Charles’ teammate answered the question directed at him “We barely talk and now with racing starting, I don’t see her sticking around much longer” he explained his current situation. 

To Charles it seemed as though everyone who had been relationships or atleast talking to someone, now had no one which made him a feel a bit guilty as he had been in a 2 year long relationship that none of them knew of. 

Later in the day, the guilt in Charles stomach only grew when he somehow found out 3 more drivers on the grids long term relationships had ended. He was feeling unnerved because it seemed as if there was some sort of relationship ruiner going through the paddock and he didn’t want to be the next victim. 

That night, he called you up, for a moment forgetting about the time change but remembering its only a small change. You answered after a few rings, you had your painting scrubs on indicating you had been working on a new piece of art 

“Hi mon amour” you exclaimed happy to see your boyfriend “I was just in the middle of painting, let me just take my scrubs off so I can move to the couch” You explained, Charles nodded his head acknowledging you

“Okay tell me how everything went today, I want to hear it all” you started talking again once you were situated on your couch. Charles started telling you about his day making sure to include what he learned about his fellow racers, which only caused you both to feel content keeping your relationship to yourselves. 

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yourusername posted on their instagram 

caption: disconnecting to enjoy the serenity of camping 🏕️

*replies disabled*

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f1updates posted on their instagram  

charles_leclercfan, f1fan, wagupdates & others liked 

old photos of charles leclerc with an unknown female leaked. reports say this was last year during the summer break, which brings up the questions of who is she? were they dating here? if yes, are they still dating? everyone wants to know. 

*comments disabled* 

charlesleclerc_updates posted on their instagram  

f1fan, f1updates, wagupdates & others liked 

more leaked photos of charles with this mystery woman. who is she? i know im not the only one dying to know 

view all comments

user11: OH MY 

f1fan: CHARLES MY DUDE WHAT IS THIS 

f1updates: does anyone have any idea on who she is 

╰ user15: no clue 

user3: she’s pretty from what ive seen 

user22: i need to know everything 

ferrarifan: what i would give to have been a fly on the wall when charles found out these got leaked 

Charles was resting in his drivers room. He was trying to mediate which meant he had his phone silenced. This was something you started doing with him when he would get in his head about racing and it helped him regain his focus especially during the moments when he was to hard on himself.

He had been in here for probably 30 minutes before there was a rapid knock on the door “Charles, its Carlos can I come in?” his teammate asked from the other side 

“Yeah” Charles answered. Carlos opened the door and stepped into the room “Have you been on instagram?” Carlos asked holding his phone in his hand 

“No why?” Charles was confused, what was so important on there that had Carlos wondering of his activity on the app “You should see this” Carlos told him while passing him his opened phone. 

When Charles looked down and saw what he saw, he felt his heart stop. There you and him were on his boat, last summer. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He scrolled through his tagged and it was flooded with the same pictures posted by various accounts 

“This isn’t good” he mumbled to himself as he passed Carlos his phone back so he could pick up his own phone. He went to go text you immediately when he remembered you had told him, you and your best friend were going camping for a few days which meant you wouldn’t have reception until you got back home. 

He opted to still text you something rather than nothing, that way you would see his message once you turned your phone back on and would give him a call. 

“Can I ask who she is?” Carlos asked after a few moments of silence “Shes my girlfriend. We’ve been together now for almost 3 years” Charles answered his friends question, figuring the secret was out now and there was no point in lying. 

“Oh wow, you’ve kept this going for that long and its just now coming to light. Thats impressive” Carlos told him 

“Yeah we decided early on to keep it between us” Charles sighed “We were planning on going public eventually but I guess the public beat us to it” 

Carlos just gave his teammate a sympathetic nod, there wasn’t anything he could say in the moment but he could still be there for his friend. 

A few days after this, when you were on the drive back to your place, you turned your phone back on, having a few texts from Charles. One that stood out, read ‘Babe give me a call when you can. I have to talk to you about something’ the text from Charles read. 

You weren’t sure what this could be about so you didn’t wait to dial his number once you were in the comfort of your apartment. After a few rings, Charles answered, asking you how camping was and catching up before moving on to talk about what happened while you were offline. 

That night you and Charles had a long conversation on what you both wanted to do in this situation and after some back and forth, finally came to a decision regarding your relationship that you both hoped you wouldn’t regret down the line. 

-

yourusername posted on their story  

caption: he’s back ♥️

╰ yourbestfriend: happy anniversary to you two:)

charles_leclerc posted on their story  

caption: when she makes you breakfast 😍

╰ maxverstappen1: WAIT ‘SHE’ ?? 

╰ carlossainz55: AW

╰ landonorris: soft launch? 

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yourusername posted on their instagram   

yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc, landonorris, pierregasly & others liked 

i guess after 3 years, my mystery man isn’t a mystery anymore. 

happy 3 years mon amour 😘 

tagged: @charles_leclerc

comments have been limited 

charles_leclerc: i love our love 

charles_leclerc: 3 years into it, a lifetime to go 

╰ liked by yourusername 

yourbestfriend: so happy for you both 🥹

╰ liked by yourusername

pierregasly: oh wait this is actually cute 

╰ landonorris: agreed !!!!

charles_leclerc posted on their instagram    

yourusername, yourbestfriend, f1, landonorris, maxverstappen1 & others liked 

hard launching because i’ve wanted to post my girl since i met her 

joyeux anniversaire, ma chérie 💌 

tagged: @yourusername 

comments have been limited

yourusername: i love you 

yourusername: falling asleep on you > falling asleep on the bed 

╰ liked by charles_leclerc

f1: we’re happy for you:)

maxverstappen1: 3 YEARS? WOW 

maxverstappen1: happy for you dude 

carlossainz55: bring her to the races so we can all meet her !! 

╰ liked by yourusername & charles_leclerc 

-

i hope you enjoyed this one. im trying to get more into including actual pieces of writing so hopefully for this one, everything made sense. as always feel free to leave any comments or you can make your own request, up to you! ♥️

[taeilskitty]

Hey there! I saw that you open for a request so here's what I thought : what kind of sound did nct make when having sex? Are they more into whimpers, groans, or maybe dirty talk? Thank you so much for answering my question and hope you have a good day!

i was BORN to answer this omg. lemme tell you, i have thought about this so SO much!! (i'm leaving chenji out of this bc i don't know how people feel about that yet)

anyways, i hope u enjoy and i hope this matches what you had in mind <3

taeil

oh fuck. taeil is most certainly a groaner. i think (and trust me, i've thought a lot) he must make these gorgeous low moans like right in the back of his throat if that makes sense - have you ever heard his bubble voice messages? oh my god, they're so fucking hot. his raspy voice in the middle of the night is just to die for. that makes me CONVINCED that he dirty talks super up close. even thinking about it makes me shiver :(( he's the king of praise, i just know it. i think he degrades too, but his favourite is when he mixes both together - "you look so pathetic there baby, how cute." "daddy loves his pretty slut so much." "god you're so fucking good for me, my cockslut~" taeil also asks things, i think that suits him so much. "yeah? you like that?" "is daddy's cock too big baby? shh, i'll be done soon..."

taeyong

whiner. whiner. undoubtedly. this boy has the sweetest, prettiest little moans... he gets all high pitched when he's close and oh god when he sinks into subspace he just mewls and his voice gets so weak </3 little "yes" and "a-ah thank you"s slip out because he such a good kitten. he's so precious... and if he gets asked to speak while he's getting fucked he just squeaks out an answer. "m.. love it... ah..." n he will never fail to say his please and thank yous - he's so well mannered even when hes getting used !!!

johnny

this is just. oh my. i think he's silent for the most part. heavy breathing and quiet grunts and groans until he's close. THAT'S when he starts moaning, all sorts of things slipping out. "god you're so good" "i love this hole so much" ahh??! i think he talks down too. fuck !!! daddy!johnny is so patronising, and not just outside of the bedroom. kinda like taeil, he asks things, but he makes u feel so dumb and cock drunk :( AH AND he like... coos when you feel all dazed from his cock... "awh~ is that good? you like that don't you sweetheart? yeah, i know."

yuta

i have this vision of yuta just SLAMMING from behind with his face right up in your ear, telling you all sorts of dirty things lowly with just the hottest voice ever. he's very vocal about what he wants, and he loves cumming inside... so expect him to talk about that. oh, he is so fucking possessive too. "hmm. mine. this is mine. you're mine." he probably bites your ear/neck when he says it... the grunts that come out when he slams are enough to send anyone reeling, but i bet he tells you "fuck. gonna. gonna cum in my fuckdoll--" n his voice just trails off as he fills you up and sighs<33

kun

now kun is !! an interesting one !! ... i envision him as a pretty hard dom, so i don't think he's any stranger to degrading. that being said, i think he's more talkative when he's giving punishments (e.g. spanking over his thigh... heaven<33) rather than when he's fucking. i think he moans lowly, semi-quietly but as he gets more and more pent up he gets louder. (i think this is the case for most of the nct doms but oh well) he'll praise how good you make him feel - assuming you've been behaved enough - but that doesn't stop him from cursing under his breath at every chance he gets ,,..

doyoung

definitely has pretty moans !! he probably does whine, but i mean that in a dom way - if that makes sense? higher pitched moans but not pathetic, in fact it's probably paired with him whispering "fuck yes, good [insert ur fave petname here]". i think he's the type to kiss you a lot during sex and like... moan into your mouth; any space not taken up by the sound of moans will for sure be filled with the sound of his panting and his tongue dancing with yours.

ten

another semi-whiner. i always saw him as a dom but i'm sliiightly succumbing to the idea that he may be a switch... which is why i think there's so much BEAUTY in his moans?? ten makes really pretty, breathy whines and moans i'm sure, i don't particularly think he talks a crazy amount but rather short instructions. (yes i'm going back to dom!ten) "turn around." "get on your knees" "quiet." AH !! he always lets you know what he needs - however, sub!ten will just whine and squirm till you make him cum because he is most definitely a slut who takes anything:(

jaehyun

first of all, this man wrecks me to the fucking core, and i could talk about this for... a while. but his moans are definitely like, raspy high-pitched type. think about his vocals. esp in try again... i bet you they sound like THAT. i'm sure he talks a bit too, tbh he probably says rather textbook dirty things but it sounds so fucking hot when it's him. "yeah take it, take my cock" "fuck yes just like that", he loves how you whine when he moans right up next to you btw - it just makes him do it even more. oh, and bonus - he will never call you ANYTHING without prefixing it with my or daddy's. daddy's girl, daddy's boy, daddy's pet, my dirty slut... ahh<3

winwin

it's almost contrasting to jaehyun but sicheng's voice is so low. i can't explain this in any way other than that he's kitty, but his moans are so... puppy? and when he's fucked, he makes himself sound so dumb too. he's constantly slurring his words and biting his lip because he's trying to keep quiet but anyone who walks by the room will hear "mm.. m!!" because he just can't help himself :( when he's close he probably squeaks like taeyong and cums all over the place GOD i want him

jungwoo

oh god there's no doubt that jungwoo talks SO much during sex. he probably loses his fucking mind with how good he feels. he's such a good boy but sometimes you just need him to shut up - but he can't. he squeaks out a little moan when you push into him, or when you start touching his cock, but withn minutes he's babbling non-stop; "oh god oh god mommy/daddy i love it so much, a-ah like that, please~"

lucas

my brain used to be convinced that xuxi was a dom, but i'm now sure he's a switch. either way, his moans are pretty much the same. they're very heavy and... i guess manly is the best way to put it. in my head i can literally picture him being like "ughhh..." when you start fucking because he just feels like he's wanted to fuck you so desperately - yes, even if you fucked hours before. it's always so breathy and moany and i think he sounds like a bit of a fuckboy tbh... "fuck yeah" as he slides his cock into you? THANKS

mark

loud baby loud baby LOUD BABY:((( no matter how much you cover that pretty mouth of his he will be so LOUD!! he can't stop talking and whining and panting, kinda like jungwoo but honestly... more. he swears a lot too. he tries not to but he just can't help himself :( "aw shit... god shit!!!" under his breath UGHHFDGGDFDD SO FUCKING CUTE IM GONNA SCREAM !!! he's very polite though, so he always says sorry every single time :( he babbles like hell when he cums, he can't stop himself, again like jungwoo. "i'm gonna cum i'mgonnacumi- i'm -- ah fuck, shit--!!"

xiaojun

two words. action figure. everyone knew that was coming, HA - i'm sorry but THAT verse means we all know how he sounds. i think he tries his best to talk normally while you edge him but his little voice keeps on wavering and cracking and just... he can't help but sound all pretty and pathetic :( but surely dejun has some (very frequent) moments where he can't keep his front anymore and just whines like a whore because it feels so good<3

hendery

the things i'd let this man do to me:))) i think at first he'd actually try and hide his moans because he feels like that's what he's supposed to do, but no. for me personally, i know i would NOT LET THAT HAPPEN !! he probably sucks the air in through his teeth in an attempt to hide it - it's very fucking sexy when he does that, granted - but he can't keep doing that for long. i think he hums and laughs when he can't keep it in any longer because he almost feels some kinda defeat but then he just moans semi-loudly and lets out a "good girl/boy/baby... let me fuck you, huh?"

renjun

renjun scares the fuck out of me. why? because his moans are fairly quiet. he's master and it S H O W S. he grunts quietly, maybe muttering things under his breath like "so fucking tight" "mmh there you go..." to fill some silence but he does it subconsciously; he goes so far into domspace sometimes that he just can't control himself. when he's close he talks through his teeth and he's like "i'm. i'm gonna cum baby..."and the more you whine on his cock the more he just laughs at you because he's a sadist hhhhhhhhhhh.........

jeno

most definitely a fun one... you see when he's sub, he pants and whines and drools all over himself like a big dumb puppy boy and he just breathes so heavy n his moans are all shaky... if he's a brat he will try and talk big but he can't take it, he just gets so pathetic and !!! but dom jeno is fucking TERRIFYING because he talks down and tries his best to intimidate you. he chuckles and degrades you, but one of his faves is when he can big himself up under his breath. "look at you now. you love this fucking cock."

haechan

this isn't good for my mental health :) i fucking cannot TAKE this brat :) AHA! hyuckie is honestly such a whore, he's bratty and rude and always talks back at you like he's the king of the fucking world. he's constantly laughing at you and trying so hard to make you feel like you're not worthy but he feels so good he just gets fucked dumb by you :( he is SO loud too. he wants everyone to hear what a dirty whore he is and he makes sure he puts on his prettiest pornstar moans. he whines like his life depends on it. on the off chance that he's being a good boy, he begs and cries and whimpers when he finally cums - and i mean CRIES. sobs. he'll be heaving by the time you're done with him, but god he fucking loves it.

jaemin

fuck... fuck okay... well firstly he loves to talk. we all know how much he praises and how he's constantly showing his love off... that doesn't stop at fanservice, nope. he will fuck you like a ragdoll and keep calm and composed as ever, talking down to you as if you're in his lap for a soft cuddle. "baby loves nana so much hm~?" "oh you really love that don't you?" "you know you're so pretty. nana wants to cum in you so bad~" yes, he calls himself nana because he's a cocky fuck and loves how it sounds. especially when you're moaning it for him.

yangyang

i'm kinda in 2 minds about this... on the one hand, he's kinda like hyuckie in that he whines a LOT. but he can actually keep his composure - he's a breathy whiner, he's not quite as loud and he most certainy doesn't crumble as easily. (that's not to say that he can't, he most definitely can.) on the other hand i think when he's in a more neutral headspace rather than subby, he talks to you like a total fuckboy. not in a mean way but he's just like "hah. i know you love me fucking you like this." he gets so cocky and he sucks hickeys into your neck and hums quietly<3

shotaro

he's such a shy baby :( he wants to moan so much but he probably gets all self conscious and tries to hide it... so you gotta make him feel safe :( when he does he whimpers and it's so pretty and pathetic. the way he wells up with tears and hitches his breath is. adorable. he whispers "thank you... ah..." every time he feels that good and by the time he cums it's just falling from him like a waterfall :( the more comfortable he feels, though, the sluttier he can get... he will always be a good boy but i think he lets his whore side come out every once in a while <3

sungchan

last but most certainly not least, yet ANOTHER boy who pains me to the core. i think sungchan whimpers too. THERE I SAID IT. his cock is too big for his own good so he just... needs you to do SOMETHING to him :( he always sighs at first, maybe hissing just a little but then he gets to a point where he's quietly whimpering because he just needs to cum so fucking bad <//3 "need it... p-please..." he's always nervous to use titles but if he wants to cum he has no choice :( when his dom asks please who? he blushes bright red n mumbles a little "please mommy/daddy... 'm so good..." and god yes he is he deserves it so much ugh<33333333333333

[kittehkwrites]

Cranky

Summary: Erik does not understand the importance of nap-time. 

Warnings: Fluff, dad!Erik, Soft!erik

Before your son was born you thought you’d be the mother of a momma’s boy or somethin... Boy were you wrong.

From in the womb, your baby boy would only calm down at the sound of his father’s timber voice.

“Aye lil man, yo momma’s tired right now and you doin all that kickin is keeping her up.” He’d say all serious but you couldn't help but smile at how he was acting and he followed on with “i’m gonna need you to bring it down a few notches” At that, your son would kick back at his father’s hand and the look on Erik’s face was too funny.

it had your stomach shaking and the little boy inside you pushing his hands and feet inside of you so that you could both feel and see his clear displeasure at being told to relax.

“Don’t get fresh lil boy.” You had to let a little ‘oop’ out when his voice got deeper and your thighs clenched up since it’s been a while. Ain’t his fault, the doctor just said to lay off it since the last time you guys went “a bit rough” and they didn’t want to chance an early birth.

The baby relaxed the same way you did when he used his authoritative tone.

“That’s right lil man.” He said after feeling the baby calm down at his command. He was smiling at you when he caught your eyes and you smiled back when he started to caress the bump caring your “future prince” as he’d always call him, since Erik stated he was the King and you’re his Queen so ‘lil man’ is the prince.

“Erik. You better make it up to him before he takes it out on me.”

“You lucky.” He said with a look like ‘what you think this is?’ But he saw your stern face and he remembered the nights of discomfort increasing since the baby was getting closer and he didn’t like you being in pain or uncomfortable during what was supposed to be a beautiful moment so he did what he could in hopes it’d pacify the baby for the night.

“Aye baby boy”- you always thought it was cute when he said that-” you know daddy loves you, right?” He pulled back from the close proximity to your stomach, waiting for the little hand or footprint to press against his large hand.

“Right?” He would look to you and you’d rub your underbelly to get the baby to respond to his now pouting father. You're convinced your baby inherited his attitude from, which would mean he’d be bratty from time to time because they can’t handle restrictions to their freedom.

“Come on baby boy. Daddy’s out here pouting”- He shoved you a bit and you just let out a bit of a scoff before continuing- “and momma can’t sleep with y’all fighting at each other” A little more rubbing and your little boy was pushing out his foot to meet the spot in which both you and your husbands hands were sat on your underbelly.

“I love you lil man. Can’t wait to meet you when you get here.” And with that, he’d put a little kiss on your belly before coming up to you, hands still on your stomach and fingers still brushing against the stretch marks that laid on the sides of your belly, and give you a soft kiss that gave you the same sparks as the first time you both kissed.

“I love you too baby.” He said before pecking your lips “don't forget it.” He said before turning off the bedside lamp and then laying behind you before letting sleep take over the both of you.

That was approximately 8 months ago.

The baby is now 6 months and your husband was a damn hog.

“Erik! Give me my baby!”

You and your husband have been playing an impromptu game of hide-and-seek with you son, Erik initiating the game after you wanted to put the baby down for a nap before heading to your parents house for family day.

“He’s mines too” He’d call out quickly before turning back to your son in his hands, continuing to make faces at the little boy and getting squeals of joy from the little body.

“Not for long you shit!” You huffed out as you started to make your way up the stairs, following the baby laughs. You were just tired and your husband wanted to annoy you, as you were convinced no man would keep the baby up for this long and not want to pass off their child to the mother. 

“He needs to sleep or else he’ll be cranky and I already have to deal with you! I don’t need to be dealing with the both of y’all at once, plus my family members coming up to me afraid to ask you what’s wrong or tell me how to raise my baby!” You continued, finally approaching the two bodies located in your husbands office. 

He gave you a look as he saw your slightly angered and annoyed expression, but he didn’t care. 

He had has lil man and his momma could stay mad, he thought.

“Babe. It’ll be alright. He don’t give no trouble, right lil man? Tell yo momma to go lay down before she pops a vessel.” He said in that ‘baby’ voice that annoyed the crap out of you but you couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow up at the nonsense spewing from your husbands mouth.

So you nodded your head, went over to the baby and checked his diaper before kissing him on the forehead and making your way out of the room.

He don’t even know.

Just as you said, so it happened.

You guys reached your family gathering and guess what happened within the first 20 minutes of greetings from aunts, uncles, grandparents and such?

If you guessed a cranky baby, then you were very right.

“Baby?” You ignored your husband who now had his signature stoic expression placed on his face, but it slowly formed into a confused scowl at the jerky limbs and loud hollering coming from the sleepy child who, may I remind you, ‘don’t give no trouble.’, according to your big headed husband.

“Baby? Your so-”

“-oh now he's my son? i thought you had that covered? Correct me if i'm wrong but didn't you say he didn't give any trouble?” You were making sure he’d hear the judgement in your voice at his foolish comments made earlier. 

“Yea bu-”

“-but nothin. Handle it before he ‘pops a vessel’” You said before seeing one of your favourite cousins and going to them, leaving your husband in a state of confusion while your son just wanted to sleep.

This went on for another 15 mins before your cousin and a couple other relatives came over and asked what erik did to the baby.

You simple said “He wouldn’t let me put the baby down for a nap.” which resulted in a few head shakes and inhales from the surrounding bodies, knowing that a nap could be the best thing for the baby and the parent.

“Girl go help that man. He probably over there trying to give the baby commands like some drill sergeant.”

“Don’t do my man like that” You couldn’t help but laugh at the way they all saw erik as this military man but to you he would always be your big softie, especially after the birth of your son. He just showed his love differently than others and you didn’t fault him for it. 

You waited another two minutes before gulping down the rest of the juice in your cup before heading to your husband and distressed baby.

“Alright papa. Momma’s hear. I know, i know. Daddy doesn’t have the magic touch huh? Maybe he’ll listen to me won't he? wont he? That’s right. Come on papa, nap time.” You said, taking him out the grasp of your husband after washing your hands in the kitchen sink and drying them off once you reached to the two inside. 

You checked his diaper and it was dry, probably changed before you got here since your husband probably thought he had a soiled diaper. You also saw the half empty bottle of milk in the baby bag near where you were seated on the couch and chalked it up to your husband attempting to silence the cries of the infant.

You had placed him on your legs once you got comfortable on the couch. Fingers running over his eyebrows, his cheeks, his nose and back up to his forehead and ears in the soothing motion. Within 5 minutes he was sleeping and your husband couldn’t be happier. 

“Baby”

“Yes mr know-it-all” You responded smartly, not taking your eyes off the small body in your lap.

“Don’t get smart now.” You had to refrain from clenching your thighs together and looked at your husband with challenging eyes.

You saw him deflate slightly once he remembered he was in the wrong. 

“I’ll listen next time.” You let out a little hum and turned back to your son in your lap. 

You just sat in awe at the life you created with the man next to you. You were so lost in thought that you didn’t realise your husband had grabbed your chin softly before turning your face to his, placing the sweetest, most gentle kiss on your lips that left you weak once he pulled back.

“I love you” He said. That glint in his deep eyes made you swoon like it had when you first met him at the black owned coffee shop near the outreach centre.

“I love you too” You said softly before smiling at the grin that broke out on his face after knowing you weren’t so mad with him. 

Hey y’all!

Hope your week started off alright and that you’ve enjoyed your weekend😊

This is the main account that i’ll be posting on in regards to my written work because i couldn’t interact as i wanted to on my side-blog.

But I won’t be deleting anything on that blog, im just moving over to this one.

Let me know what you thought of this soft imagine and who you’d like me to write for or just ask me anything😁

Remember to like, share and/or comment and be safe!

Love y’all and thanks for the support.

-K💜

[spacedikut]

spencer finding out you can sing!!!

i already kinda wrote something like this in ‘sweet siren’ but am i gonna pass an opportunity to imagine im talented and spencer reid is in love with me? no.

the first time you shower in his apartment is weird for a lot of reasons - no ones used his shower except him, so he’s overthinking everything about it and his bathroom and, although you’ve convinced him to stop using 75-in-1, what if you find something else that makes you dump him and you dump him while in a towel and he’s a weak man he won’t be able to handle your disappointed face wrapped in a light purple fluffy towel with water droplets on your skin.

it also feels so...intimate to have you using his bathroom. it’s a reminder that you’re real, really here, really in this relationship with spencer and being with him and sticking around, which isn’t something that happens often, so much so that it’s possible this - you using his shower - could become a regular thing. this could become a regular thing and his heart is thumping. he can’t sit still. how can you expect him, already a buzzing bee thinking too much at once, to be calm when he’s already seconds away from telling you he’s in love and you’re in his shower, for goodness sake.

and you’re singing.

which isn’t abnormal. spencer does it, too, but he prefers to recite random bits of information he’s read and appreciate the acoustics he somehow has in the small space, but you’re reciting a melody and it echoes and slips under the bathroom door, heading for spencer and wrapping around his heart like you don’t already have him in a chokehold.

he doesn’t know the song - of course not - doesn’t know the artist or the lyrics or anything, really, especially when it comes to you, but he knows it’s one of the most beautiful things he’s ever heard and your voice is already his favourite sound, but now? with the added knowledge you can sing?

he’s a goner. for you, he’s a goner.

he tentatively broaches the subject when you’re towel-drying your hair, still humming while spencer leans against his headboard and pretends to read. “you have a pretty voice,” he tells you. which is the understatement of the century, but you appreciate it all the same and explain how you’ve been singing your whole life, a talent that shimmies out when you’re home and comfortable.

you’re a wonder, honestly. he never thought someone who looks like you and acts like you and is you would stand at the end of his bed, smiling at him and laughing at his awe-struck face. there’s a lot to process: just. the way you look. at him and in general. the talent you’re so clearly humble about. the fact you, in spencer’s apartment, use the words home and comfortable.

you used the words home and comfortable.

when you crawl into bed, curling close to spencer but trying not to disrupt his reading, you begin to protest when he nearly throws the book to the side. he wiggles into your arms, head on your chest and leg nearly wrapped around your waist like a koala, and in the softest, gentlest, sweetest whisper, he asks, “can you sing to me?”

and you do - because how could anyone say no - and it’s so much more than just singing. your voice enters every crevice, every nook and cranny of his room and apartment and abolishes any negative thing that’s seeped into them before you came along. every time he came home, haggard and hurt and so so lonely, you voice takes a broom and brushes them away. not hidden under the carpet or pushed under chairs, it grabs them by the neck and throws them out - to be gone and exiled for as long as you’ll stick around (which is forever, hopefully).

he’s close enough that he feels the vibration of every note. every word and intake of breath he feels like it’s his own, like you have melded into one and. maybe. maybe this- this demonstration of this side of you, and the fact you just used his shower and have confirmed for spencer that you are part of him-now- in a way that is both terrifying and exhilerating, maybe this is the beginning of the rest of your lives. sharing everything with one another - the simple things like a shower and the deeper things like an angelic voice - makes everything very real and very intimate.

and here, with you, hand in his hair and singing love songs that - for once in his life - he’s confident are for him, he isn’t so scared. not nervous or unsettled or unsure or anything other than loved, really, and excited by the prospect that this - you, tapping a rhythm on his back with your other hand - is the first chapter of the many more to come. the first of many more chapters with you, singing and using his shower, and he can’t find it within himself to complain. not one bit.

[casvist]

hello my lovely peaches , *puts my clown wig on bcs i’m shy* i’m back at it again, being a greedy bitch and bringing you my second  and super fake muse, yeva.  remember that part where the darkling’s fake ass pretended to be all nice and wholesome. well, yeva is faker than that. she probably has severe back pain from single handedly carrying all her lies on her back. anyway, i could slander her more but i will probably do that later. if you want to plot please LIKE this post or IM me/message me on discord and i’ll bring some clown shoes and ask for some plotting ( but in.... greedy )

PINTEREST  . PROFILE .    BIO (tba) .  VIKTORIYA.     discor*d     six of hoes🔪#7888

[ yeva zudina ], an [ twenty-eight ] year old grisha in the little palace. she is a [ tidemaker ] and are known in the little palace as the [ mountebank ]. they are known to be [ adaptable ] and [ devious ] and vaguely resemble [ davika hoorne ]. 

( okay my soc ass had to make her grow up in ketterdam i’m sorry )

- before yeva knew that she was a tidemaker, she was what one might call an “ordinary” girl in ketterdam. ( as far as anyone can be ordinary in ketterdam )

- as many people living there, she didn’t really have the best time of her life there. her father, well, he was just a name causing an uncomfortable silence whenever one would mutter it. her mother, she tried her best to survive in that hellhole. although, yeva knew how much her did for her, the only person she really could get close to was her step-sibling. ( a wc i’ll elaborate more on when i’m finally requesting that wc). though not bound by blood, they meant the world to yeva and little yeva felt as if she had to protect her from whatever was lurking in ketterdam’s (shady) alleyways.

- despite of her noble intentions, realistically she wasn’t strong. and how so? no one taught her how to protect herself and she was still a child. however, yeva didn’t want to wait around for nothing. instead, she decided to take matters into her own hands and looking back this idea was really stupid, but she wholeheartedly believed that messign with some other kids would be a brilliant way to improve her combat skills ( all my muses have to be stupid at some point i’m sorry, theyre all dumb)

- of course this plan failed terribly ( and instead she was the one getting her ass beaten  ).  luckily someone witnessed that (comedic) unfortunate scene and helped yeva out. and this somehow became the turning point of her life. yeva, completely awe-struck with the stranger, wanted to know more about him. truth to be told, he didn’t do much and his presence alone somehow scared the kids away ( poor kids almost got into a fight with a grown-ass man) but yeva didn’t really care. turned out he was a drüskelle (retired though (as much as one can), thus he didn’t really have to rely on any grisha “magic”, something yeva really admired.

- long story short, he not only became a mentor to yeva ( who successfully convinced him to show her some “cool” drüskelle tricks) but also a father-figure. yeva really trusted him and his beliefs also became hers. which we might say weren’t exactly grisha friendly. at first she didn’t get why he hated grisha so much, to her they didn’t seem too bad but as time passed his words left a mark.

- however, what actually made her end up despising grisha was a certain incident. as much as this day affected yeva, everything happened within a second. a short moment of exchanged laughter, cruelly disrupted by two grisha. tidemakers ( a cruel twist of irony ) . looking back at it now, yeva figured that these two grisha had a long and unresolved grudge against him ( which wasn’t too surprising with him being a drüskelle) and had their eye on him ever since. 

- to put it briefly, yeva was forced to witness the death of someone whom she considered a father to her. yet, fate couldn’t be more cruel on her and it was also the moment her abilities were triggered , and , of course, she turned out to be a grisha as well. make it worse. a tidemaker.

- skipping over all the formalities (bcs this is getting too long) and luck not really being on her side she was brought to the little palace. her mother wasn’t too surprised and knowing that yeva wouldn’t have a future here at ketterdam, she thought that ravka was far more appealing.

- yeva wasn’t happy of course. not only was she forced to be with the people who she despised she herself was one. at first, she refused to do anything at all, she didn’t mind if she were to be punished for her stuborness. no one knew why she was behaving this way, they just shrugged it off as her being a spoiled brat refusing to be useful. yeva, however, didn’t continue to be like this forever and what happened next surpirsed everyone. suddenly, she was eager to train and improved quickly. all they saw was a hardworking grisha but what they didn’t know was that yeva’s intentions weren’t noble. 

- instead of wasting her time at pitying and hating herself, she realized that she was at the perfect place to learn everything about her ‘enemies’. 

- basically, she has that grand plan of trying to destroy things from within, being the wolf in sheep’s clothing (cutting this short bcs this is getting long again). 

personality

- honestly, as i’ve mentioned before she’s fake. and not in that way where she’ll just pretend to smile and go on with her day, she really goes out her way in acting as if she was the sweetest and kindest girl out there. however, everthing she does serves some purpose. she helps you with some training ? she gives you some advice on a personal matter ? she compliments you on your smile ? lets say she doesn’t do it out of kindness. not when you’re a grisha. of course, she isn’t perfect at keeping this act up all the time.  and if one pays a little more attention to her actions, they can see her facade crumbling. still, where vika is all about being straight-forward and accidentally hurting one’s feeling without meaning it, yeva is all about sugar-coating when she needs to but also deliberately using one’s weakness against them.

traits ( adding some bcs i want to redeem her a little bit but i also don’t respect her so..) 

[+] adaptable, decisive, loyal , observant 

[-] ruthless, doesn’t think through consequences, blindly faithful, intrusive

headcanons

- tba ( but i just had to add that yeva prbly wouldn’t hesitate to push someone from the ship when they’d travel through the shadow fold.)

- every time she must do more than simply tolerating grisha, like saying that they’re great she probably loses one year of her life

- trying to keep her reputation yeva is known to give exceptionally good advice

- as much as she despises that “grisha magic” she believes in things like card reading, fortune telling and is quite faithful to the saints (regardless of being grisha or not)

connections

someone who sees through her (shit) facade and unlike everyone else who perceives yeva as that sweet angel, they find her suspicious and doesn’t trust her.

a grisha who is the complete opposite of what yeva think they are and might as well be someone yeva tolerates and might add that 0.1% of character development 

listen an unrequited love bcs i’m laughing at the idea that someone might fall for her super fake persona and the more time they spend with her they start to realize that it is just an act.

someone who turns for advice to yeva bcs of her reputation

*sneakily puts my step sibling connection here so if u r intreested hmu ;) but i’ll also request it later but rn i’m too lazy*

HONESTLY EVERYTHING i love angsty and dramatic shit, but i’m super open for other ideas bcs my two braincells need that wonderful input and inspo so gimme all the connections PLS !!! *types this in thirsty for all ur wonderful muses*

[lveclouds]

euphoria and boba (jjk x reader)

a/n: this is the last and final drabble for the bts bubble tea date series!! thank you all so much for supporting me and this series!! your incredibly sweet comments and feedback have made my heart very happy and warm:((( thank you to my sweet mutuals for supporting me and encouraging me to keep writing! i love you all to the moon and back!!!

genre: fluff, tooth-rooting fluff, slightly cheesy (you’ve been warned) 

word count: 100+

rating: g (for all audiences)

dedicated to these angels: @softguks @sketchguk @sweetheartjeongguk @jungkooksmoon @moonbeamjk @jksmoongf @gukwluv @gguksbby @gguksgalaxy @lomlkook @kookscrescent @koosgrl @kooksmos @guktual @artjjk @jeonify @guksheart @onherwings @utopiajeon @swanqook@jeonangels @cherryjk @sweetpeajeon @lovejeons​ @jinsjjk @jjksangel @gukkism​ @jeonsdear @jeonsbun @kookswife and all of my jungkook biased mutuals, i love you all so so so so so so so much and i hope you all enjoy this drabble!

   (in which jungkook sings euphoria to you, in the middle of a boba tea place, or jungkook being the little cutie that he is) 

you struggled to hide the blush that was spreading on your face as your boyfriend of two years, jeon jungkook, serenaded you, his voice sweet and smooth and chill-inducing, a fond smile on his face. you fought the urge to smack him on the arm due to embarrassment, as there were a few people in the cafe that were staring at the two of you, amused. “jungkook!” you hissed, blush deepening. one of his perfect eyebrows raised in question, but he continued to sing his heart out, much to your dismay. while you loved to hear jungkook sing, as it was always amazing and never failed to take your breath away, but the sole fact that he was singing in the middle of a crowded place was a bit embarrassing, as all the attention was now on the two of you. 

“s-stop! people are looking!” at this, jungkook let out a soft laugh. “aw, is someone embarrassed?” he teased, doe eyes glinting with amusement and mischief. “y-yes, just a little.” his smile only deepened, the corners of his eyes crinkling, and your heart melted at the sight. jungkook was gorgeous, well, that was more of an understatement. jungkook was absolutely stunning. soft, raven hair that was forever falling into his eyes, gorgeous brown doe eyes that practically sparkled, especially when he was happy or excited, sharp jawline, soft, pink lips that were like heaven to kiss, and the cutest little mole underneath his lower lip, a feature of his that you found to be quite endearing. his smile, however, was easily one of the most gorgeous things about jungkook, at least, according to you. his smile lit up his entire face and never failed to make your heart melt, especially when the corners of his eyes would crinkle. whenever he smiled, you felt as if you had been punched in the gut, especially when said smile was directed at you. a simple smile from him made you weak at the knees, and your friends teased you for being so whipped for jungkook, but you didn’t care. after all, it was hard not to be. not only was jungkook one of the most stunning guys you’d ever seen, but he was also one of the sweetest and most caring and loving guy you knew. you suspected his heart was probably made of gold, for jungkook was always unfailingly polite, humble, respectful, and thoughtful. not only that, but he respected all your boundaries and made you feel as if you were the only star in the sky. and yes, admitting these things to yourself did feel a bit cheesy, but it was true. jungkook was the only person who could make you feel special and loved and “on top of the world.” 

so, because you loved  jungkook, you decided to stop from trying to convince him not to serenade you in public. you would undergo secondhand embarrassment for him any day. “you are the cause of my euphoria.” he sang, his voice clear and smooth and sweet and melodious. jungkook’s singing never failed to take your breath away. his tone was sweet and soft, but despite that, you could hear the emotions jungkook was trying to convey, no matter what song he was singing. 

a fond smile made its way onto your face as you listened to your boyfriend sing his heart out, receiving your mango bubble tea in the process. your smile widened as you took a long sip of the refreshing beverage, making your way out of the cafe, jungkook in tow. 

jungkook hummed softly as he gently grabbed your hand and laced your fingers with his as the two of you made your way down the street. the air was cool and crisp and the sun was shining brightly, bathing the world in golden beams of light. despite the weather, jungkook was wearing one of his all black outfits, cargo pants, chunky black boots, and a simple black carharrt sweater. he made this simple outfit look as if he just stepped off the cover of vogue. he always looked effortlessly gorgeous, even after a long day of rehearsals and photoshoots. you adored the small tattoos that adorned his hands, for you knew that while they were simple, they held great significance. 

“jungkook?” “hmmm?” he replied, turning his head slightly to look at you. “i love you.” he smiled brightly, wrapping a strong arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. he let out a soft chuckle as he kissed the top of your head sweetly. “i love you too.” sure, your boyfriend loved to embarrass you on a daily basis, but you loved him regardless. 

a/n: ty all so so so so so so so so so much for supporting me and this series!! all of your sweet messages have made my day and are motivating me to keep writing and improving!! a little s/o to the lovely angels that belong to the heartsforbts discord chat and the hopeworld net one as well!! ily all so much and thank you for always supporting me, no matter what! much much much love to all of you!! thank you for loving this series as i much i loved writing the drabbles!! also, about my untamed au, i’m going to put it on hold for now because i don’t have any ideas for it :(((( im so sorry guys and i hope you all don’t hate me for this:((((( 

tagging: @agustkive @take-u-2-an0ther-w0r1d @honeylovecult @dylanxmin @joonglows @biminiee @yoonsgiggle @birthofvcnus @franklytae @jungtaeyoongles @roguebangtan @yourdelights @nahfamily @kimcritique @taesangels @floralyibo @jinhopetual @kimseokjinss @seokoloqy @btsrespect @j1ns @ksj1 @ksjmoon @ksjluvs @joonsbaby @joonsbesitos @gukssunshine  @brilliantlybasicb @flowerseok​ 

[waterfall-mirage]

So I wanted to write some theif Chat Noir and Marichat and came up with this

Sorry if the spacing is off this is being Sent from iPhone™️

A criminal.

Explained simply by the dictionary: a person who has committed a crime. A lawbreaker, delinquent, villain, culprit. These are all words you’d associate with someone who lived a life of crime.

So clearly- speaking in an obvious term- one should not get themselves into any trouble of the outlaw type. Yet somehow the bad luck seemed to find Marinette everywhere she went. She didn’t know when the infatuation had started, but she could remember seeing him on the news a few weeks ago when she had gotten home from her internship with Agreste fashion. She had to stay late as Natalie had requested her to revise some upcoming fall designs. As tired as Marinette was there could possibly be no way she could turn down an opportunity to add her own touch to such a massive collection.

Stepping through the door she lazily threw on some sweatpants, let her hair down from a tight headache inducing bun, and flicked on the small box t.v that sat on her kitchen counter. There was a low humming noise from the device as it tuned to find a channel. Marinette rolled her eyes, she needed to save up for an appliance that wasn't almost older than her. She turned away grabbing the pink kettle off of her stove filling it with some water. Another classic dinner for a starving artist, instant ramen. Pulling her bowl and chopsticks from their designated spot she listened into the news channel. Chat Noir had struck again, this time a watch store. The helicopter cam followed him as he seamlessly bounced between the roofs of homes. Marinette stepped forward from her position of leaning on the stove trying to get a better look at the tiny screen. Dressed clad in black as usual the unknown street cat did what he does best vanishing in between two buildings, a considerably dark alley even for seven o’clock in late summer. The helicopter hovered for a moment before the screen changed back to Nadja Chamack. Marinette let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Turning back to the stove to finish her meal. Chat Noir was a force to be messed with, he had already stolen three paintings from the Louvre successfully, rumours saying his fourth was nearing soon. The police have no clue on where to look or how to find him. Nicknamed by the public Chat Noir was “the vanishing kitten”. The name undermined his work, so he claimed he was going to step it up a notch.

Although Marinette never agreed to be a part of it.

The sweetest of dreams were brought to her that night. A wonderful extravaganza of her showing off her very own fashion line at Agreste fashion. The theme was 1960’s era mixed into modern fashion. Blissful, teals, reds, ivories, yellow, pinks dancing along with patterns, skirts, and thigh high boots washed over her. An Airy white translucent button up blouse with bell sleeves paired with a deep red pencil skirt. She could feel her dreamself twitching to start the sketching process. However, instead of witnessing her dream unfold she was unfortunately startled out of it in her dark room. Marinette rubbed her eyes as the sirens of Paris’ police department whizzed by flashing red and blue lights briefly through her windows. Groggily she reached over smacking her night table until her hand came in contact with her phone. Squinting at the brightness the phone displayed the time of two in the morning. She groaned pulling the pillow over her head to try to drown the noise out. Until she heard a thud from her balcony. Blue eyes opening behind the soft pillow Marinette’s heart dropped at the sound.The wind must’ve knocked one of her plants over, that's all. She sat up peering over to her french doors there was nothing to be seen in the pitch blackness of the night. Marinette let out a sigh of relief, what was she thinking? She placed her pillow back in its original position laying back down.

“C’mon, Marinette” she whispers to herself. “Get a grip”. She closed her eyes once again.

Chk. Chk. Chk.

Then she hears it, a slight rattle. A familiar rattle, the same rattle she’d dealt with when she first moved in trying to unlock the door. She now knew there was a slight left turn jiggle she had to do to get it to unlock. But clearly this intruder isn't one of the friends Marinette told this trick to. She panics jumping out of bed, she has no place to hide in a studio apartment. In the dark she blindly reaches for any sort of weapon. Her small hand grasps the baseball bat her dad had given her as a defense weapon when she moved out. Of course at the time she laughed at it but still hugged her papa anyway, joking that she’d take up baseball soon. Her blood goes cold, what an awful thing to come true, she thinks.

The rattling stops Marinette lets out a mini sigh, maybe it was a Chat Noir copycat that just wasn’t cut out for the robbing life. She lowered the rod down her shoulders sinking a little. “Whew” she manages to let out.

Then the door swings open. Marinette holds back a scream lifting up her weapon “Whoever is trying to get in here I don’t have much but I will defend my life for it!” She pathetically calls out in no particular direction. Marinette can’t see much of anything until she spots them. Two glowing green eyes in the darkness of the room. She lets out a tiny shriek waving her bat around, she feels a “thwoop” in her hands. In fear of the unknown Marinette swings her arm frantically towards the wall her fingers just barely smacking the light switch. The baseball bat which she thought she had acquired was actually an umbrella, that was now spread. Still holding her guard Marinette lifts the “weapon” pointedly towards the black figure in her partially lit apartment.

A chuckle leaves the cats lips as he walks towards her. “Aw, Princess opening up so soon? We just met” he smiles coyly at her. The hairs on the back of Marinette’s neck rise. Up close Chat Noir is handsome, which Marinette decides is very unfair as she’s currently being robbed by him. However, she’s also certain he couldn’t be much older than her as well. Which gave her a bit more confidence to tell him off. As he approached she jabbed the umbrella at him which humoured the cat as he lifted his hands up in the air as if he had been caught in the act. A devilish smile displayed in amusement. Chat Noir began to move in closer and she got a better look at the thief. His golden hair disheveled in front of his face casting a slight shadow over his viridescent eyes which seemed to glow. There was a black mask covering his upper face from cheek bones to brow. Black cat ears were perky twitching as he moved as if picking up on things. He had a small black pouch tied around his waist which seemed to be full. Marinette speculated it was used to stash smaller items such as jewelry or watches as he had stolen earlier that day. His boots were somehow quiet as he maneuvered towards her. She tried to keep distance with the umbrella at arms length but quite true to his cat nature he slipped through the barrier. Red and blue lights flashed outside her apartment once again. Marinette left with only a few options left resorted to the cry for help. As she parted her lips the cat seemingly doubled his speed to prevent what he knew was about to happen his leather clad hand covered her mouth in seconds.

“Shh they’re coming.” He coo’s pointing upwards and winking as the sound of a helicopter chopped past them. Marinette noticed a puff of air that had left his chest. A sigh of relief most likely. “Chat Noir, charmed to meet you” He turned to her, sneaky green eyes burning a permanent image in her mind. He gently removes the umbrella from her grasp lifting her hand to place a kiss on her knuckles. Marinette makes a face in disgust retreating her arm back to her side.

“You are?” Chat continued on pretending Marinette had not just clearly shown she wanted nothing to do with him. A smile so sweet perked up his features even the baker’s daughter felt her stomach protest. Marinette confused, and quite frankly still scared gathered the courage to fiercely bark back at the mangy cat. “None of your business, now leave!” She crosses her arms over her chest. He sighs in a feigned love sick kind of way placing the back of his hand against his forehead gloved fingers curled. “Such a shame I don’t get to match such a pretty name to an even prettier face” his body language shifts and a devilish glint in his eye shows he’s toying with her, playing with his prey before he feasts. “However, I think Princess suits you well.” Chat practically purrs. Marinette can’t help the shiver that runs down her spine. Her cheeks heat up and she curses her body for being weak to even a compliment from a criminal.

“Relax, okay?” He spins the now closed umbrella between them. “I’m not here to rob you, i'm here for refuge” Chat states matter of factly before turning away from her and walking around her apartment like he owns the place. Spotting the kitchen a little “oh!” leaves the self proclaimed non-burglars mouth as he struts over to the fridge. Marinette who was previously frozen to her spot comes back to reality. Well who does this mangy cat think he is? She stomps after him shutting the fridge. Chat Noir mewls pulling his thumb out of the closed fridge door suckling on the injured digit. “I don’t know who you think you are, but you don’t just go around taking refuge in random peoples homes!” Marinette whisper yelled pointing at him. Chat rolls his glowing eyes still sucking on his thumb. “Now look at me im involved in your stupid crime” she pokes his chest which she refuses to admit is very hard at the moment. He gives her a deadpan as if to say “yeah, yeah, i’m listening”. This enrages the bluenette further.

“And give me my umbrella back!” She swipes the black umbrella from his greedy paws. Marinette marches over to the still open french door the cool August night breeze flowing into her apartment. “Out!” She calls pointing with the umbrella. Chat grins a cheshire smile appearing ear to ear. Marinette isn’t completely sure how to feel about his demeanor. A snicker leaves him and his shoulders bounce as if to show his amusement.

“Oh, i’ll go” Chat smirks walking towards her from the shadows of the kitchen.

“But I like you princess” he firmly states. Chat Noir saunters towards her in true cat fashion in long strides of his legs. Marinette's heart rate picks up as he nears. What is going on with her? He’s close, too close Marinette decides. When she takes a step back it’s into the door she realizes she can’t get enough distance between them. His nose mere centimeters from her face she blinks, once, twice, his glowing eyes still boring into hers.

“So I'll be seeing you again” he whispers. Marinette’s breath hitches, hands pressed to the glass door behind her. He salutes her with a wink “Goodnight, Princess, see you soon!” With that he leaps off of her balcony and into the night. Wide blue eyes stare at the bright white moon. Her hands clutch her chest wrinkling her newly made pyjama shirt. “Oh Marinette what have you gotten yourself into now” she whispered into the night. Marinette slid down the door continuing to keep eye contact with the moon. Safe to say she didn't sleep well that night.

[aliiii-glasgow]

The Devil

Have you ever looked into the eyes of The Devil? I would imagine you would instantly say a simple “no”.  I challenge you to think again, because he is not who you are thinking of.  I, personally, have gazed into his eyes, time and time again. I know him all too well, and have been under his spell for 7 years, now. You see, The Devil is a simple man. He’s tall, has long hair, and tells you the sweetest of lies. He has the most beautiful green eyes you have ever seen; sometimes they appear more gray or blue. My friend, The Devil, has many tattoos that lay upon his skin so perfectly. Some of them are quite beautiful, and some of them are not, but each one possess a story from his past. Although he may seem like your average human being, he is far more powerful than that. You can feel his pain when he walks into the room, it opens up an endless pit inside of you. You can feel his insecurities, for they shine bright despite his efforts to conceal them. The Devil will show you pure bliss, just to replace it with true hell. I can only warn you about him, but your fate lies in your own hands.

It was a warm day in June of 2014, when I first met The Devil. He was a real “cool guy”. I didn’t pay him much mind, considering that he was just the current boyfriend of my best friend, and those relationships never lasted long anyway. I brushed him off, figuring this would be the first, and last time I ever saw him. Unfortunately, I would see him again, and again. Shortly after the breakup, I received a message from him. Of course I didn’t think anything of it, for I was the most innocent of all my friends. Little did I know, that The Devil was seeking me out, like prey. He could feel my weakness  from the moment he met me, and he knew that he could fool me. He knew that I would give in to him, and I did exactly that. You see, I was innocent, and he admired that, but The Devil fell from Heaven for a reason , right? I reminded him of what once was, pure and untouched. He couldn’t help himself, he had to destroy me. He couldn’t wait to get his devilish hands on my pure body. Unfortunately for me, he accidentally touched my soul in the process. 

I was young, and looking for love. I did end up finding it, in an empty and heartless man. I knew he was broken from the second I spoke to him, but it was okay, for I was too. I always had a love for damaged goods. Now, I didn’t think I could fix him, nor was that my intention, but we understood each others pain. I thought at the very least, we could console each other. We both came from broken homes, so it was a bonding topic. We spent so many nights criticizing the way we were raised, and all that we had to go through during our upbringings. I wish I knew he was just buttering me up, so he could use me just like he did everyone else. I have a soft spot for things that are broken, for I always say “you can find beauty in everything”. I found The Devil so unbelievably beautiful, despite his tragedies. I was warned, many of times.;by friends, family, and not so friendly strangers. It was too late though, The Devil already had me in his clutches. I was right where he dreamed he would get me, and I didn’t care about the dangers ahead.

The Devil has a way with words; smooth, nonchalant, short. He doesn’t have to say much , for you to know what he means. He really knows how to be tempting, it’s his specialty. He tempted me countless times, and soon after, tainted me. One summer night he decided to take his moms car, even though he had no license, and come pick me up around 1 am. He really never was a fan of playing by the rules. On that night, I left the safety and comfort of my childhood home, just to end up walking the streets to get back home after doing things that no 14 year old should do. See, The Devil isn’t the brightest of the bunch, so he left the keys in the ignition while we were in the backseat. From early on, I started to notice his streak of “bad luck”.  You might ask, “What are you getting out of this?”.  To that I would say “Truthfully, I don’t know, I just feel a connection.”. I should have known then.

Without much time passing, The Devil, and I, decided it was time to lose what was left of my purity. He was beyond ready to get to defile my untouched body. I didn’t know better, and the only guidance he gave me was based on his benefit. I trusted him, so I agreed. After about 3 whole minutes, it was done. It wasn’t quite like what I had expected. It wasn’t a “magical experience where your souls connect”. It was simply painful, and unfulfilling. I didn’t feel any different afterwards, just like he said. How could I blame myself? He was confident, and charming, and I am a sucker for sweet nothings, and he’s right, “it doesn’t matter anyways.” He put on a big show, and made it seem like he knew everything about the female body, and I was highly disappointed. I always thought that sex was for both parties to enjoy. Trust me though, it gets worse from here. 

After a few months go by, I was in so much pain that I was vomiting uncontrollably, and crying into the toilet. I had no idea what was wrong with me, I had never felt a pain like this in my life. Are menstrual cramps always this bad? My mother had to leave work to take me to urgent care. They were unable to find the cause of my pain, and sent me to the ER. Now, imagine how scared I was, having no clue what’s wrong with me. It was at the ER where they asked “Are you sexually active?” In front of my poor mother. It was in that moment that she found out that I was. After being probed by the doctors, they sent me home. A week or two later I got the news that The Devil had given me an STD. Fortunately for me, it was curable, but unfortunately for me, my love for the Devil has no cure. The Devil lied to me. Apparently he never had it, even though both of his ex girlfriends did. 

So, after finding out this devastating news, I had to contact The Devil once more. I had thought that we were over, considering that he moved on so quickly after our short lived relationship. The Devil was not pleased to hear from me under these circumstances. Somehow, everything suddenly became my fault. Apparently, I, the virgin, gave him the STD. Now, trust me, I am just as confused as you are. I sat, racking my brain trying to think just how this was possible. After realizing that there was no way on this Earth that this could be true, a flood of emotions went through my brain. Not only did he lie to me, he blamed me. His anger towards me was nearly unbearable. How could The Devil be so inconsiderate? This is when I really should’ve known.

After doing my research, I realized exactly what had happened. He can’t take responsibility for a single one of his actions. His goal is to make you seem as crazy as possible so that he might not have to take a look at himself. It is truly amazing how long one can keep up this act for. In fact, to this day, he keeps it up. So, after him accusing me in every way he could manage, I decided that I was done with The Devil, I would no longer speak to him. Shortly after, the friendships I had lost due to this catastrophic relationship were healed. I gained the trust of my friends back, and life was good, without the influence of The Devil. Although, this would all not be true, and they would all be disappointed once more.

After a few months, The Devil crept his way back into my life. We decided that the past was silly, but he still didn’t admit to anything. I accepted passed time as responsibility, as well as an apology. I decided to blindly overlook this glaring red flag. I decided that everyone deserves a second chance, even The Devil, who will so gladly take what he can get. Now, he currently is in another relationship while reinstating ours. I didn’t think much of it, other than being proud that he chose me over her. I gave him plenty of time to break up with her, because being the other woman wasn’t as bad as I had thought. He had me right where he wanted me, once again. How did I not see it?

Now it is time to tell the part that really ties us together; trauma bonding. The Devil told me about this “super cool” drug, called LSD. He absolutely adored this drug. I would go as far as to say  that this reality altering substance may have been his first true love. Well, I loved him, and he loved LSD, so why not do it together? Right, there’s about a million reasons why we shouldn’t, but that wouldn’t stop us. This is when it gets dark. This “super cool” drug was by far the worst experience of my entire life, up to this point. In this moment, I saw The Devil for who he really was. He was bright red, and screaming in my face. I knew I was in love with Lucifer himself. Well, what is there left to do now?

I knew exactly what I should do. I should cut all ties with The Devil, and run as far away as possible. Well, how could I do that? He was there with me through the most terrifying thing I’ve ever experienced. Wait, he was the most terrifying part of that event. Oh, Im silly, it was just the drugs, right?  Theres no way I’m actually in a relationship with “Lucifer himself”. He may have done some awful things in his past, but that’s definitely behind him now, right? Wrong. The Devil was just waiting to break me down even further. That is exactly what I would let him do.

He then decided that cheating on me was the right thing to do. After all we’ve been through together, I didn’t foresee this. Now, I should’ve expected this, but I truly didn’t see it coming. Apparently, we were in an open relationship that I wasn’t aware of. This was surprising news to me. The Devil denied ever having said anything of the sort. Not to mention he denied that he cheated on me. It was at this point that I started to recognize his pattern, and lifestyle, but it was too late. He was in love with a fast life. The Devil himself had become my drug of choice; my addiction.

I forgave the poor Devil, yet again. How could I not? He is my favorite drug, and things would be different this time. He pleaded with me, “please don’t ever leave me!” whilst crying into my arms. Of course I said I wouldn’t leave, but in the depths of my mind, I knew I couldn’t stay. Was he putting on an act? Or was he finally breaking down? It was neither. He was just as addicted to me as I was to him. Now we had a real problem. We were just constantly using each other to get our fix. This was a dangerous addiction. How could we go on like this? Is there a way out?

The way out was away from each other. Little did we know that this was merely just another break in our 7 year relationship. My dog, “our son”, needed a new home. So I reached out to my friend, Lucifer. He was thrilled to take him in, and to see me after a year. I, also, was ecstatic to see him. This was our perfect opportunity to reconnect, and try again. We had such a long tolerance break, so things would be different this time. Or, so, I thought. Things started out perfectly with co-parenting, but it was all just smoke and mirrors. This was merely another excuse to keep us coming back to see each other. To no surprise, Lucifer couldn’t handle being a parent, and neither could I. Everything fell apart once again, and we parted ways on good terms.

So, now that we’re both addicted, the story becomes predictable. Of course we reconnect, and things are different this time. We have both grown, and are living on our own, seeing each other as successful. This time it is meant to be, and we won’t be playing anymore childish games. My best friend is dating his best friend, and everything is falling into place perfectly. This was proven to be true for all of one whole month. Everything was better than ever in the past. We were like our own little clique. It was the four of us against the world, and we were unstoppable. That was until The Devil does what he knows how to do best. Not only did he leave with no explanation, he completely disappeared. No last words, no reasons why, no goodbye, this time. All that I got from him was heart breaking silence. The crash of this extravagant high of being with him was enough to stop the world from turning. This had to be the last time. How many sleepless nights would it take to end this pain? How many bottles of liquor would it take to forget him?

It was at this point that I traded the addiction to the Devil for another. I began drinking excessively to numb the pain. I couldn’t stand his absence. It felt as though my very soul had been ripped away. No matter how much I drank, it wasn’t enough to forget him. It was only enough to drunk text him, and make things far worse than they already were. I regularly made a fool of myself in the eyes of the public on social media to try and get his attention. I would’ve done anything to get him back.

So many nights went by, but only for me to realize that I wasn’t done. I needed my fix. I just so desperately need one last chance to make things right. I got that chance. The Devil came back, and this time it was absolutely unbelievable. He had changed significantly. Lucifer, as I knew him, no longer existed. It was as if The Gods let him back into Heaven, and I was blessed enough to meet an angel. His flaws seemed to vanish right before my eyes. He became everything I had ever dreamed him to be. He was perfect to me. He had become sweet, loving, caring, and willing. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing and experiencing. What did I do to deserve such an angel in my life? It was pure bliss. By far, it was the best thing I had ever experienced. The Devil traded his old ways for new, but so had I. I was soaking up all of his good nature, and trying my best to give back. Was I trying to give back, or trying to trap him? Now, I had him in my clutches. Wait, when did I become The Devil, myself?

Somehow, the roles got reversed. I had him right where I wanted him. I noticed he was slipping away, so I tried even harder to keep him in my grasp. I did everything in my power to keep my grip on him. I used his own manipulative tricks on him. I acted sweet, caring, and loving, just to reel him back in, and it worked. He wasn’t going to leave me over my dead body, or he wouldn’t make it out alive. Noticing him trying to leave, I gave him one final choice. I told him he must stay, or go this time. He chose to stick around, which only added fuel to the fire burning both of us alive.

After a few months into the most beautiful relationship I had ever known, the world came crashing down. The Devil reformed to his devilish ways, once more. One day, he disappeared. I completely stopped hearing from him, and I was left to wonder if he was still alive. Our scheduled plans passed, with still no answers from him. This made me absolutely furious. I made so many phone calls, and sent numerous texts, still no answer. The Devil left me high and dry, with no way to get another fix. The part that I could not stand was that there was yet again, no explanation. Just maybe if I got one last fix of The Devil by saying goodbye, it would all be over, and I could quit my addiction once more.

I was wholeheartedly devastated. My world was over in my eyes. If I could not get my fix, then what was I to do? There are a million things I could’ve done, but instead I chose to go to any extent to get my revenge. My revenge consisted of exposing Lucifer. He had posted a video of him defending people at a Black Lives Matter protest, and I decided to counter act that. I had a video saved of him saying n****r.  This was a common thing for him to say, and it felt so good to see his life crumbling down, and threats being sent his way. The fire we had created had finally turned into a full blown explosion. It was just what The Devil inside of me needed. I needed my fix of his attention, and that’s just what I got. I  got his attention through a phone call. This phone call added to the flames of the world around us that we had set ablaze. We created hell for each other, and it felt just like home. When did I become so hateful?

I realized once that wreckage had cleared, all the damage I had truly done. Not only did I have a long run with The Devil, I had become The Devil. What I learned, is that The Devil lives within each and every one of us. He taunts us, tempts us, and tries to control us. Unfortunately, sometimes he wins. This time, he triumphed over me, without hesitation. The goods news is, that this will be the last time I will ever have danced with The Devil. My old friend, Lucifer, will no longer be able to hold power over me. it took me 7 whole years to break free, and say goodbye to Lucifer. He is no longer welcome in my life, nor will he ever be. 

As for The Devil inside of me, well he resides in all of us. It is up to each individual whether or not you let him come out to play. I have since put The Devil to rest, in every aspect of my life. He has served me illy, and I no longer hold space for him. I will forgive The Devil, and all of his workings, for he has taught me many valuable lessons. Lucifer, I wish you the best in all of your affairs, but leave me out of them. I forgive you, but most importantly, I forgive myself.

Your Old Friend,

Ali

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Fav fics

So as I’m approaching being two decades old soon (😱😱), I decided to look back at all the fics I have written in the past year or so. Yes, it’s a bit of a shameless self promotion but who cares 🤗

Utmost favorites: Love Potion Extravaganza https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/181955720067/love-potion-extravaganza-ch-1

Winner’s Curse https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/182344754787/winners-curse-prologue What a surprise, my two long fics are at the top of the list as favorites. Love Potion Extravaganza especially as it’s complete and it features some of my favorite things, ships, musicals, and the utter insanity that comes with love potion gone wrong. And although I have not finished Winner’s Curse, it’s certainly one I enjoy doing by taking any and all Disney characters and incorporating them into my huge cast and of course, trying to dive into the darker themes implied in the Descendants franchise. Funniest: Kiss meme Estenaomi almost kiss https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/184257194637/you-basically-asked-for-it-and-i-couldnt-resist#notes

Campechana Conditioning https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/178679085792/campechana-conditioning

Alonso’s Legen-Wait for it-Dary Dating Rules https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/186657814897/alonsos-legen-wait-for-it-dary-dating-rules Love Potion Extravaganza I already wrote why Love Potion is such a joy above. Love comedy of Errors and all that. Kiss me Estenaomi was fun because well young Esteban and Naomi bantering is always fun to write specially as it leads to ridiculous nicknames and a passionate kiss. Campechana was taken mainly from a Big Bang Theory episode because it’s just too perfect to not imagine Esteban and Doña trying to condition each other. Alonso’s Legen etc etc. was taken from How I met your mother if one cannot tell from the title and just as Barney Stinson, Alonso doling out his awful advice to an land-clueless Marzel was too good to pass up.

Angst/Hurt/Comfort: Deserve https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/184295644377/deserve

Disconnect & Still Here https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/611748633146163200/disconnect & https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/190788257312/still-here

Tete a Tete in a Jail Cell https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/189553140372/tête-à-tête-in-a-jail-cell

Song of the Sirenas drabble https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/183673052607/song-of-the-sirenas-drabble

Starved https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/175733451452/starved?is_related_post=1

Broken Pieces https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/181464010247/broken-pieces

No room for weakness https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/174697101917/no-room-for-weakness Deserve is top because I really gave Esteban the angst in that one. I really enjoyed putting Esteban in one of his first low points throughout his life and with no comfort in sight. Disconnect & Still Here are kind of two sides of the same coin in the breakdown of the Delgado marriage with Ash’s being about of all the trials of motherhood and her jealousy of Victor and Carla’s bond while Victor’s is his realization that his wife is dead, and he is a single dad and dealing with that fallout. Tete a Tete was an emotional Carla piece since we haveN’t heard one word from her since The Magic Within special and I wanted to explore the isolation of the jail cell, the heartbreak over her father and her utter wretchedness with some hope coming in the form of the Captain of the Guard. Song of the Sirenas drabble was just a small piece on what Mateo’s reaction might have been like at the thought of Elena dead after the battle with Shuriki. Starved was my first piece with darker themes since it alludes to her life in poverty so I’m proud of that one. Broken Pieces is another emotional hurt comfort from Elena’s POV in the aftermath of Rise of the Sorceress and dealing with the heartbreak of her Mamí’s crown being broken, symbolizing all the danger she is in now that Shuriki’s back. Finally No room for weakness is another Esteban angst because Esteban always brings on the angst and emotional repression but luckily Elena’s there to pick him up.  

Heartwarming and/or Romance: Mistletoe https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/189843988472/mistletoe

Saying Goodbye https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/189558947892/saying-goodbye?is_related_post=1

Reunion https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/189252050212/reunion

Intrinsic https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/187971072332/intrinsic

Safe in his eyes https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/186678480327/safe-in-his-eyes

Kiss meme Gababel kiss on the fingertips https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/184397938137/im-kinda-late-on-sending-this-but-if-youre-ever#notes

Kiss meme Estoma kiss over the wrist https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/184233727497/i-looooove-your-drabbles-rachel-okay-so-how

Estoma drabble https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/190476170997/little-estoma-idea

Mood Swings https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/187648741932/mood-swings?is_related_post=1

Three’s a crowd https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/179313607297/ch-1-threes-a-crowd

This is my son https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/182500372627/this-is-my-son EoA Appreciation Week: Gabe Melee https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/186979963112/eoa-appreciation-week-day-2-melee

Coffee Run  https://cartoonfangirl1218.tumblr.com/post/174694324052/coffee-run

Mistletoe is pure unadulterated Eleteo Christmas fluff and one of my best of the Eleteo confesses their feelings stories, I think. Honestly it was just overall a joy to write so I love looking back on it. Saying Goodbye, I was just so proud of this one because it was the first Estenaomi story that popped into my head without the help of prompt. I have some difficulties thinking up scenarios for them for some reason but this one flowed so easily, imagining how young Esteban would be after Naomi’s departure in The Last Laugh. Reunion was just a little fic based on what of the sweetest slow burn romance songs, “This is not my idea” from the Swan Princess. Intrinsic is another Eleteo one and its a fav because it just... I wanted to explore Mateo’s feelings after Elena almost died in Naomi knows best and just give name to the bond that they share. Safe in his eyes explores the same idea with Elena working through her new nightmares of being sacrificed and Mateo, the ever faithful is there to hold her close. Gababel is so fun and sweet to write and it was scarily easy to write Isabel being flustered (way too much experience in the easily flustered department) and of course, the first blush of crush love and having a mature Isabel interact with Gabe. Estoma kiss meme was a departure from the usual frenemy bantering to what I imagine was their initial partnership where they were reserved and feeling each other before unleashing their true personalities. The Estoma drabble started as a drabble but turned into a full length fic-let of what I imagined as a clandestine affair to hate to comfort to frenemies to potential friends which never comes to fruition because Esteban ran off with Ash. Mood Swings was initially inspired by a Kim Possible episode of the same name but evolved into one of my only heartwarming Delgados fic centering around Carla’s birth.Three’s a Crowd was one of my few attempts at Naomi POV which I think I did serviceable job and it was fun to go with a classic love triangle hijinks with suspicious Naomi, scheming Carla and clueless, arrogant Alonso. This is my son is one of the only YJ fics I’ve written down and so I love it because I wanted to include Rocket more into the team and Team dynamics and all that. I don’t write many Gabe POV fics so this one, I’m proud of, especially for giving Gabe a chance to shine in beating up a malvago and never giving up even when stabbed. Finally Coffee Run, a Goldenvibe fic because I wanted them to have a little more closure before the Legends of Tomorrow series started up.

[dark-and-kawaii]

He’d be so warm and fluffy... blanket? Who needs one when you have Fatgum ｡ﾟ(TヮT)ﾟ｡ Thank you very berry much xoxo I’m starting to slowly feel better -_- I just hate missing school. *snuggles*

*hugs back and smiles* thank you so much xoxo I think by tomorrow I’ll feel better. I have no idea what happened I think I got food poisoning >~< Thanks again for caring ^^ means so much to my little heart!

That’s what makes him so beautiful... Shigaraki try’s his best °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

*tongue hangs out of my mouth in a non sexual way* R.I.P. I’m slowly getting better. Still have a lot of pain and weak, but the puking has stopped. Thanks a bunch (;-;) I just always feel like poop when I can’t do what I originally plan! This week was supposed to be the week I get requests out and look at me *dead*

(っ´ω`)ﾉ(╥ω╥) I’m sorry about the marine biology. It can get tricky and tough, trust me I know.

D’awh thank you for being the sweetest, no migraine, just icky stomach pains that won’t leave me alone >< I just always imagine him the size of Totoro with myself laying on top of him (^\\\^) I wish we could all just cuddle like him!

Im also really sorry you suffer from terrible migraines D: that’s no fun and I know they’re just god awful.

[thedeviljudges]

shame shame it is my name ive been going through your harringrove tag all day and im just. completely fucked. choo choo the harringrove train has left the station you have a one way ticket to hell please enjoy the ride with some fine literature that will make you wish you had your very own cuddlebuddy while crying like a bitchbaby. please have some patience, i will be back shortly to tell you all about how you and these soft trashboys ruined my life! 1/10

SO FIRST YES YOU GOT ME INTO ZIAM. I can’t remember when but dear god ive been here for a long, long, looooong time. also can i please cry about your fics. because. i feel like they dont get enough love and im just!!! every time you write because your writing is just so?? idk?? im like “ah, noel wrote this. i CAN FEEL IT BECAUSE I GOT PUNCHED IN THE FEELS” and im gonna be superembarrassing but like i love you dude. you’re so fucking talented and it saddens me that all the work you put into ziam fics and drabbles never got the attention they deserved. like MIDNIGHT LIGHT. how freaking cute was that im just seriously Im gonna die ok i love it so much oh my goood the beginning when they met and Liam just replied with “okay” IM JUST. its so stupid cause there wasnt a lot of interaction between them at first but i just LOVED it?? like well done this made me feel like a 13yo also i love the way you describe it when liam smiles like i can see it happening in front of me and i get why zayn melts and falls for him every time. i have so much love for that fic you dont understand. am i gonna yell about my favorite ziam fics wHY YES I AM. We’re dreamers in castles made of sand (also i really like your titles btw) blew me away. I got chills and it didnt go the way i expected it to go, the usual boy has sex with a prostitute, catches feelings& saves them. i love that you didnt let that happen. Liam saved himself and im just so happy! caring and supporting zayn was amazing to see but the fact that liam did it on his own and THEN CAME BACK im weak i love it so much. ive already told you i love the under the rose universe. i cant even pick a favorite moment im just in awe of this entire serie. listen. i love liam and veronica with everything that i am and i would die for them. also. Vanilla sweet universe is just everything ok jfc.

okay. okay so i had to sit on this all day because i just. you’ve overwhelmed me, for real, lmao. like, i don’t really cry over messages, but this one? kinda got me good.

(and also, idk if you meant to send more, but i did only get the 6/10 so that’s what i’m replying to!!)

first off, lmaooo you’re hilarious as fuck. this message? as good as the one you sent the other day. i’ve reread it a few times, and i laugh at it each one.

but okayyy ok ok. i wasn’t expecting this lovefest, but i s2g, this is the sweetest. you’re not embarrassing, trust me!! i always love to know what people think of my fics. call me greedy, i guess, but i genuinely love to hear back from people, even if it is negative.

although uhhhhh, i love you???? like damn???? i mean, no lie. there’s definitely a few fics of mine from ziam that i wish took off more. i got comments on ao3 here and there and asks from time to time, but how i found out people liked my stuff was either through recs or casual discussions mutuals would send me because they just so happened upon it. i hate being that bitch that /wants/ to hear feedback because it sounds selfish, but like, some of those longer fics were so draining, and sometimes i got the feeling that me (and a few others tbqh) were just placeholder authors??? we were ~there for filler fics until…. well uh, lmao, other ones could finally put out.

ok. midnight light…. is one that i forgot about because lmao, that’s not one i’ve heard anyone ever talk about actually?? it might’ve gotten a few comments, but omfg. you saying that is really surprising???? i actually did love that one. kinda felt bad i didn’t make it longer or whatever, but it just made sense. i’m so glad you liked it, though!! but it’s definitely not stupid!!! that’s so wild that it makes you feel that way bc i get that way with fic too and omfg. i didn’t know people did about my stuff?? fuck. you’re way too kind.

ALSO LIAM’S SMILE. i tried to include that a lot because liam really does have the most beautiful smile. it’s so bashful and looks so genuinely happy and adorable and ahhhh.

about the dreamers fic…. gah. i love the concept i did with that, but when i look at it, honestly??? my writing is terrible???? omfg. i cringe at my old writing, i swear. but i think that fic is the most popular one. dunno why, but i’m so glad you liked the ending!! i don’t even think it was intentional to try to do something different. in all honesty, i don’t even know how i came up with the ending, lmao.

really, i’m just gonna keep thanking you over and over and over again.

fic titles… i love coming up with fic titles, and i’ll have you know that most of them are just song lyrics. i usually go for the most unusual lines in songs because they seem the most fitting? and what’s crazy is that when i hear it, i know immediately whether it’s a title or not. idk if that’s intuition, but to me, all fics are like children, and when you hear the title, you just know??? ok now who’s the embarrassing one, lmao.

under the rose - is my weakness, my soft spot. all born outta me trying to prove something to rude ass people tbh, lmao. wrote it out of spite even though i knew it wouldn’t be popular, and i just remember back in 2013 when ppl thought i was crazy as hell for loving veronica so much, and IM STILL GLAD i’m not alone in that.

vanilla sweet was also sorta born outta spite?? just in the sense that it didn’t have to be stereotypical abo that was written in the time (ie dubcon or more).

honestly, i can’t even believe you like all of these??? these were incredible messages to get, babe. like i said, you did make me tear up, and idk why you decided to stick around with my boring, bitchy ass tbh. i feel like is scare a lot of people off real damn quick, but i appreciate it so much. i really fucking do, and you’ve totally made more than just my day and night. i’ll legit be thinking about these for awhile now. fuck, i’ve talked your ear off too and yet i could wrote another 10 pages, i bet.

literally, THANK YOU SO MUCH for this and for giving my fics a chance. it really means the world to me, even after all this time. i appreciate it so much.

[dahcyst]

A Flower for the Bee [Chapter 4]

[AO3 link : http://archiveofourown.org/works/9238850/chapters/21035531]

That's why we care, Yuri had silently thought, and the idea of keeping this to himself had felt so right and wrong at the same time, that he was even more lost than before, here in front of J.J. and his intense looking.

Ater that, he'd left the rink, choosing to stretch as much as possible, and J.J. hadn't stopped him in any way. From his looks, Yuri could tell that the man appreciated some peace and solitude. He didn't know why but still, he knew it, he could feel it, by the way J.J. often spaced out, his eyes zoning with no particular point. He needed some space. Why the fuck the guy had come to Russia, by the way?

Yuri grimaced when his body betrayed him, keeping him far from his usual stretching goal with a deep pain irradiating his knees.

Lilia wasn't present today for the training, busy on many plans, and he had to face the empty room. It wasn't silent since he'd put on the CD reader that was set in a corner of the room, and Allegro Appassionato in B minor  was playing in a low tone. He needed to focus on something he knew perfectly, and if this performance hadn't been his best for the final, it was still a great program. He knew it too. Lilia wouldn't stop arguing about what was right or wrong and in the end it just got on his nerves and made him unreceptive about all that. He'd done it, not by far but still, he had won.

At that moment already, he'd felt it on the ice rink; the pain coming from nowhere but his own growth. The sudden feeling had almost made him fallen. Almost but it was here  he couldn't do it right.

Yuri growled when his back abruptly complained at his usual arching but he didn't listen. He couldn't. It wasn't of him to be like that and the idea of not being able to work like he used to was just unbearable. Stretching on the soft floor, Yuri finally raised his eyes to the mirror wall of the ballet room. It wasn't him. It couldn't be him. He knew about boys changing pretty quickly into men, he'd heard a lot about it, but it wasn't possible.

He was taller than Otabek. Soon he would probably larger. But not now, he tried to reassure himself. Not now, he was still slim, probably not as much as he used to, if had to take J.J.'s words, but from what he could see in that huge mirror, he wasn't build like Chris or J.J. and it was all he could think to feel better.

Or Otabek. He wasn't as large as Otabek, he was sure. He quite hoped, actually. Sighing, Yuri caught his phone again and went through his news feed before judging that no, he wouldn't get what he was looking for in it. He left the application, checking in his saved pictures and finaly found it: that picture from the Grand Prix Final he found last night. Otabek's tiny smile made his heart beating accelerate but he tried to focus on the body only. Despite his white clothe on the upper part of his body, despite the waistcoat hiding a little his strong, powerful chest, Yuri was able to say how muscular and amazing was Otabek's body. It had nothing to see with his at the moment. Would he become like him someday? He let his eyes trailed down on what he could take from the picture : the neck, the shoulders, the chest. That waist, perfectly shaped, and he could remind every moves, every twist of his performance he'd seen on that DVD so many times. The barrier of the rink hide whatever was present after that, but Yuri knew by heart the shape of the low waist, of those absolutely perfectly shaped ass cheeks and--

He suddenly stopped when his body reminded him about how tight his spandex trousers were and two seconds after the young boy was cursing all he could against himself. Oh shit, shit and shit, what the fuck was he doing, what the fuck was he even thinking, looking like that at Otabek?

He rushed to the toilets, running in the corridor and not giving much attention to who he was crossing and hitting with his houlders –he definitely was too large and should start living with it, no matter how he disliked it.

But that wasn't the problem here, and as soon as he was locked in a toilet cabin, he sighed loudly. At least here, there was no risk to be seen in such a state, and he mumbled at the idea of being caught with the beginning of an erection in the middle of the ballet room. He winced. That was probably the grossest thing that could happen. There was no music here and the silence started to overwhelm Yuri. That was something he hated pretty much, and he started checking his phone to get rid of every thoughts he was having. Otabek's butt and this disgusting silence. Otabek's butt. Otabek's nicely shaped ass. Otabek's--

Shit.

Otabek had sent a new message. Yuri gulped a little a first, then slightly remember that no, Otabek wouldn't never know about what was happening. It was ok. He was just fucking hiding in the toilets, his stomach doing a flip because of the sudden stress.

 Ota-bee : "alive flower?"

Yuri hadn't answer to his apologies from before, locking himself in his stretching training. It probably was the great moment to chat a little, at least it would take his mind out of all that mess.

 Yura : "im not a fucking flower"

Even if, he had to admit, he was unable to dislike that small nickname from Otabek. But he wouldn't say it.

 Yura : "im alive"

 Yura : "tired"

 Ota-bee : "training too much?"

He hesitated a little on the answer. Ith his other hand, Yuri pulled a little on the crotch of his trousers to allow a little more room for his current problem. He knew it was still early, but it hadn't decreased for now and the time was flying by too fast.

 Yura : "kind of. i suck at skating today lol"

He sat on the toilet seat, trying to gather himself back. Stressing over something that stupid would only make things even worse.

 Ota-bee : "you suck? make me laugh"

Yuri sighed. If he wasn't going to say all his problems to Otabek, at leat some little things wouldn't hurt...? They were friends. And if that word was pretty new, with an amazing meaning to him, Yuri knew that he could, maybe for once, complain a little. Just a little.

 Yura : "falling too much, yakov yelled"

 Ota-bee : "be careful, where are you now? Nursery? Youre ok?"

 Yura : "toilets"

 Ota-bee : "wtf you doing in the toilets?"

 Yura : "shit"

How could he be that stupide? Hands shaking stupidly around the plastic frame of the cellphone, Yuri pursed his lips. He hadn't even taken the tie to process and actualy think about what to answer to Otabek but he knew that should haven't said where he was right now. If the guy was to discover his problem, it would be the end of the world. Of his world. The 'I'm hiding in the toilets since I've a fucking boner because of your fucking hot ass' was definitely not the thing to say and Yuri gulped loudly at that. Not to mention that he was definitely having a problem, a huge one, if his body reacted that easily to...Everything and nothing at the same time?

He hated teenage. It was the worst thing in the world.

A look at his phone and he sighed out of relief : Otabek had replied. Like a stupid again, but it was for the best and Yuri rushed on the first possible answer he could get from that.

 Ota-bee : "what? you shitting? With your phone?"

 Yura : "fuck you im sick"

Ok It was a lie. Yuri didn't like it a lot, actually he totally disliked it, but it wasn't a situation where he could say the truth. Right? Plus, uh. It was quite true in a way. He was sick. Teenage was a fucking awful illness and it was currently making him weak in the knees, and his whole body ache with pain most of the time.

 Ota-bee : "what"

 Ota-bee : "are you alone now? You should vomit if you not ok"

 Ota-bee : "where s yakov"

 Ota-bee : "and vic"

 Otabek's concern made a sof twarmness spread in Yuri's chest and the hint of guilt just hit right at it. But for both their goods, he just couldn't say what was going on. Like...NEVER.

     Yura : "its ok im not a kid!"  

     Ota-bee : "but youre sick dumbass"  

     Yura : "just stomach"  

 Actually a little under. But well. Uh. Yuri sighed again, pulling again on the fabric of his trousers and the feeling of the soft friction against his crotch almost made him see stars and he rolled his eyes to himself, mouth tightly shut to hold back a little moan -of SURPRISE of course. Oh dear, no way.

 He had to get out of this. Quickly.

     Ota-bee : "does your grandpa have smthg for stomach?"  

     Yura : "yeah yeah"  

     Ota-bee : "wonder why i don't believe you"  

 It was a curious idea, Yuri thought, even if Otabek was fucking right. He frowned a little nonetheless.

     Yura : "tch" Ota-bee : "take care of yourself man"  

 Yuri caught himself smiling, and somehow it was hard to imagine himself here right now, his hand stretching the fabric of his trousers between his legs, sitting on the toilets while typing on his cellphone. What a trash, he thought.

     Yura : "yeah yeah"  

     Ota-bee : "dont yeah yeah me man"  

     Yura : "yes mom"  

     Ota-bee : "…"  

 Yuri kept a small laughter back, picturing what Otabek's hard features could look like right now. Somehow it was funny and at the same time, he only could imagine it soft, sweet. Nice. His heartbeat didn't suddenly speed up. His face didn't violently burned to turn hot like hell. There wasn't that ashaming feeling going down his stomach to his guts as he was genuinely thinking about his friend.

 There was something else, something he didn't really get. It was just the sweetest feeling, the nicest idea of 'something',yet he was unable to put a word on it. It was like how he felt happy whenever Otabek came to talk to him, every of his words, the simple thought of his smile, of his gaze to him, like during those few days in Barcelona.

 Yuri blinked a little. He felt great. Just thinking about this had made him smile. He just needed to talk to Otabek, and it wasn't the fist time he was realising it. Everything would be ok. There was no need to rush, no need to fear that much.

 It took him a little longer to calm down his boner. Patience had never been his thing, plus the stress of being caught locked after more than half an hour in the toilet cabin didn't help him at all. But he was feeling better, lighter. Slowly, he'd let go of the fabric of his trousers, rubbing a little the painful seam between his legs with the tip of his fingers. It made him shiver, of course -he knew it would but wearing that thing again was definitely out of question. When he stood up, the whole dark leggins told him how tight it was, pressing around all his muscles as much as possible.

 He had to change, now, he sighed while opening the thin door of the cabin. In the room, there was a sall and round figure at the sinks, washing his hands. Yuri took place at the sink beside, silent at first. Then, he started.

 "Yakov, I..."

"After training," the man cut, "come to Victor's flat. We have to talk. Don't eat before, we'll get something for the night."

 Yuri swallowed thickly at Yakov's words. It asn't the first time they were having something like that. Usually, it wasn't for good news, so the lump quickly came deep in his throat. "Y-yeah," he murmured. The feeling of water running on his skin made him shiver even more than his fingers in the cabin. Differently though.

 After that, Yakov had quickly disappeared, leaving Yuri alone with himself again. His phone buzzed softly beside the sink where he'd put it while washing his hands.

     Ota-bee : "celebrating bday tonight?"  

 Yuri sighed. How wonderful. The night would be long, not in the way he woud have liked. He hadn't planned on celebratinghis birthday at all; he was alone at home and the only thing that sounded pretty good was spending his time on his computer, scrowling down his news feed and chatting with Otabek until the young man would fall asleep. It would still be early, since they had three hours of difference between their countries, but this program was probably the best he had in mind.

 Not...That. Would it be about the Spring Gala? Yuri finally had no idea what was really going on, Victor's words still lingering in his mind. He'd thought about something, of course, Mila was the strongest person they had in store for him to train with, so? He'd had imediatly thought about Otabek, of course. More probably because of the theme for the duet, which was the most powerful program the Kazakh had performed under his eyes. But if Victor had left with a very light clue, letting him hope, Yakov hadn't said anything.

 Worse.

 Otabek had never even talked about the Spring Gala to him. Never. It was in twenty days, as Victor had reminded him earlier. Not that Otabek had much time left. If they had planned to make them as a duet, the young man would already be preparing his coming to Moscow. But he was busy like...Casually busy. Training, classes, training again, like Yuri every day passing.

 Yuri didn't stop by the ballet room, heading to the changing room. He didn't know what was going to happen, but he just couldn't let thing escape that far. He had to work, no matter who he would be paired with –even if he wasn't one to easily match with anyone. They all fucking knew it, so what were they thinking about?

 After lunch, Yuri didn't took the time to talk to anyone. J.J. was stuck with Victor, laughing frequently –it sounded like a good thing, but the blond boy ignored them when they tried to catch him to eat. None of them talked about the fact that Yuri had returned to his casual clothes, his deep scowl printed on his face, and he even heard the word "pouting" and "kid" in the same sentence coming from Victor. But he didn't get the whole thing from that far, so he just cringed in silence.

 He closed himself in the viewing room. It was a small place, with a short old sofa in it, and a average TV screen able to play DVD videos. On a shelf beside the TV fourniture, a pile of DVD boxes. He checked amongst them for a few seconds but it didn't take him lng to find what he wanted : the same DVD he had got from Yakov three months ago. On the cover, 'Grand Prix Final 2016' was handwritten. The round letters were Victor's.

 hen the show started on the screen, Yuri had already set himself on the sofa, knees up to his chin, light off in the room to focus on the TV, on the body moving on the ice, on the music poundering in his ears. His moves.

 He had to concentrate.

 He had to learn, had to know more about this program. Because, even he wasn't paired with him, it as Otabek's program and he just couldn't fail at it.

 Yeah.

 He couldn't.

 Sometimes, he'd take a break, eyes burning from watching too much the video, again and again, fingers tight around the remote of the TV. His cellphone was set on his chat with Otabek and he occasionally gave a look at it.

     Yura : "no celebration, no time, no friends?"  

 He would never mention how many time and how much pride it had taken to write this. Never, really. Otabek probably knew without being told.

     Ota-bee : "no friends? i feel rejected"  

     Yura : "not you dumbass"  

     Ota-bee : "kidding"  

     Ota-bee : "your grandfather didn't plan anything?"  

     Yura : "na he's still not back"  

     Ota-bee : "wtf youre alone!"  

  Yuri had giggled a little at it. Otabek sounded pissed of, even shocked. Minutes ater minutes, Otabek was still answering, sometimes pretty fast, sometimes it was taking him more time and somehow Yuri wondered what he was doing. Training? He looked at the time. It was already past 4PM here in Moscow, so...It was something like 7PM in Kazakhstan. Evening training might have started for Otabek.

     Ota-bee : "plus no time? What about night?"  

     Yura : "meeting wth yakov & vic"  

     Ota-bee : "they make you work for your bday night?"  

     Yura : "dunno"  

     Ota-bee : " :/ "  

     Ota-bee : "i ll wait till you get home ok?"  

     Yura : "what"  

     Ota-bee : "nothing"  

 Yuri had uselessly scowled at his screen before going back to the video. He was tired, couldn't count how many times he'd watched it. He could get the essence of the moves, part of the logic in them. But he wasn't sure about how to put it into a duet. What's more, was he right to study Otabek's program for this? He'd automatically thought about this when he knew it was the Symphonia N°9 for the exhibition. But who would choregraph it in the end?

 He hadn't asked and had probably lose half his day in it –or not, he kind of really liked watching the show again and again no matter how many times he'd already watched it at home.

 He found himself pouting when he gave a look at the time. It was being late. Otabek would probably go to bed soon.

 Yuri sighed, and gave a try. It wouldn't kill him after all. Since when was it difficult to ask simple things?

     Yura : "btw what about spring gala this year?"  

     Ota-bee : "the what?"  

 That settled things. Otabek didn't know and it probably wasn't so surprising. He was far away –but so was J.J. on the other hand. But they didn't have the same weight in the ice skating world and Otabek wasn'probably wasn't invited in a lot of events all over the world.

     Yura : "forget about it"  

     Ota-bee : "ahah ok ok"  

 After that, the phone was stuck in his back pocket and soon he was closing everything in the small room. It was dark until he opened the door and the long figure in the enlighted corridor made him start a little.

 "J.J.!" He low mumbled, and the man lifted his attention from the phone he was so much into, eyebrows gathered in a thick line above his eyes.

 "Ah, they were right, you were here!" J.J. smiled, in that way Yuri didn't like. Something sad was sticking around the man, that was all Yuri could tell and it was a little too...Disturbing. He wasn't quite sure if it was the word he was looking for, but still, it was at least a part of what he was feeling about J.J. at the moment.

 "What are you doing here?" Yuri sighed, his bag under his arm as he was trying to zip up his coat with one hand. J.J. shook his head, coming closer to help the boy.

 "They're all gone but you," he said. "So I've been waiting, I even thought they were kidding when they told me to wait at this door."

 Yuri blinked at him, unsure. J.J. was defintely weird. More than he usually was.

 "Wait, why were you waiting for me?"

 "Well...It's nighty now?"

 J.J. had sounded like he had to think before answering and Yuri frowned.

 "And so?"

 "That's your birthday?"

 "And soooo?" Yuri insisted again.

 J.J. shove his hands deep in his jeans pockets as they'd started to walk in the corridor to the main hall.

 "There are fangirls outside waiting for you?"

 "I'm big enough."

 "In the dark," J.J. added, rising an eyebrow.

 "What the fuck are you trying to do?"

 "Nothing, really?"

 "Really?" Yuri sneered.

 J.J. rolled is eyes furiously. "Oh yeah, REALLY, prince fucker! Man, I don't even know why he's so much worried about you!"

 At his words, Yuri gave J.J. a dark look but still an interrogative one.

 "What?"

 "You know who I'm talking about, boy!" J.J. sighed. While talking, he was refraining a smile toward Yuri who looked a little out of the place at that moment.

 "Uh, you already talked about O—Otabek," Yuri mumbled. Otabek's name suddenly sounded heavy in his mouth in this silent hall.

 J.J. sighed at that. "Yeah, to be honest I didn't expect at all that he would come and ask to help you. He didn't need to ask for that, I'm not one to leave friends in shi--"

 Yuri had suddenly caught J.J. arm without a warning. "What? What do you mean 'come and ask'?"

 J.J. turned his gaze away. "Weeell..."

 "You didn't said it like that this morning," Yuri blamed.

 "Did I?" J.J. shrugged with a funny smile. "Don't tell Otabek, he tried to be discreet."

 It was awkward in every way, and J.J. definitely felt it too. He pat Yuri's back gently while opening the door and pushed the boy. "Princesses first!"

 "Fucking jerk!"

 On their way, they weren't alone.A lot of people were still waking outside despite the cold weather and Yuri adjusted his scarf around his neck. Victor lived near the the rink but it was enough walk to get frozen by the icy wind. Sometimes, Yurio could hear a high pitchy scream that reminded him of the girls from the morning and he winced. Every time, J.J. would put his hand in his back and the blond boy wasn't sure if it was mean to be reassuring for him or threatening for those girls staking on him –probably on both them actually as J.J. was incredibly famous, but no one seemed to know that he was here.

 When J.J. pushed the doorbell of the flat, Yuri huffed a little. "What are you doing?"

 "Uh? Well, I sleep here."

 "Wha--"

 There was a soft buzz in the intercom and J.J. leaned toward the mic. "Ah Victor, it's us." Then a low "Oh!" answered and Yuri frowned a little. They were the ones who wanted him to come, so why did he sounded to, how to say...Unready? Surprised? Or something else?

 "Not coming?" J.J. asked as he had already pushed the door after the slizzing buzz opening the building.

 "Mh, yeah, yeah."

 The staircase was only enlighted thanks to a poor bulb in a corner, so they had to take care of every step not to fall.

 "Hey Victor, how comes you leave in such a shitty place?" J.J. asked while entering the flat first. He'd let the door half closed on Yuri who cursed after the man, pushing quickly on it.

 But it wasn't like he was used to. Darkness were all around him, and the sound of the door slamming closed behind him made his heart jump. Oh shit shit shit--

 With a cold sweat suddenly going down his spine, Yuri stepped further in the flat, a hand befor him in case he would bump into J.J., but it didn't happen. The man wasn't in his way. It was awfully silent, dark, and his stomach squeezed painfully with worries. What did that mean?

 "Vi--"

 A bang resonnated, making him jump on his feet with fear. Something light and soft like a paper rain was touching his face and the light was suddenly on.

 "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

 Victor was in front of him, A open papercraft tube in his hands and some multicolored confetti still on the back of his hands. For the first second, his face had been severe, in the same way as when they'd talk earlier that day, but his features suddenly lighted up, his smile softened while his ice blue eyes where loonking at Yuri.

 "Happy birthday," he repeated, more gently, and one of his hands let go of the thick tube to brush confetti away from Yuri's head. "Sorry, here you scared? We tried to prepare a little surprise."

 Yuri was just too voiceless to answer immediatly. Pretty agape, the boy looked atVictor with a lost expression, then at J.J. who still had his hand on the light switch beside the entry door, then at Yakov who was standing a bit setback, trying to hide his discomfort for being here -and probably his timidity.

 He swallowed slowly, mind blank. He'd wanted to run away at first -but the door was already close in his back. He didn't really liked surprises like this one, it was always weird and he was never sure if he'd react in the good way. Was it ok to smile, was it ok to let go of everything and show how much it was carrying him away with joy? Was it really ok?

 Wouldn't it be childish of his? WOuldn't it be used against him in the future? The young skater felt a pressure on his shoulder and he turned his eyes to his side. J.J. was standing here, hand heavy on him with a huge smile.

 "Birthdays are better with friends," the man said. "Don't you think?"

 Yuri nodded then kept his gaze on the floor. Friends, uh? He was still so insecure about that term, he'd been figuring out what it was like by being in long distance contact with Otabek for the last three months now. But somehow, it felt different. Victor moved his hand from Yuri's head to his other shoulder and brought him closer. It wasn't a hug or anything, really, but his arm brushing the man's sides was bringing him to a soft feeling, something sweet spreading in his chest -not as much as when Otabek was talking to him, but still. He wasn't alone. He wasn't alone, and that very idea made him a bit ashamed of all those awful thoughts crossing his mind all day long. They knew. They knew him, they knew that something was going on, they knew that he was changing, little by little. Every day, theyre were here, by his sides. For years already. He nodded again, slowly, lips tightened in a thin line.

 On the small round table, Yakov was placing a large plate with something that looked like a cake -probably? It looked a bit weird but he had never heard about Victor's cooking skills before, nor Yakov's.

 A small pack was here too, wrapped in a red paper with small snowflakes and Yuri reminded the day Victor had bought it in Spain to wrap Yuuri's Christmas gift.

 "He-hey, Yuri, are you ok?" Yakov mumbled. The blond boy could see the old man's ears as red as it was humanly possible.

 The blond boy could see the old man's ears as red as it was humanly possible and it made him smile a little. But he drop his gaze back on the floor. "Yeah, yeah..." All this just was so unusual that he didn't know how to move at all, and he let Victor lead him to a chair.

 "Oh my, Yurio, don't make that face! Ah, J.J., I told you he would be all pouting and that!"

 "Yeah but that's a cute reaction, coming from your baby tiger! Look at that princess, eh! I'm pretty glad we could make it in the end."

 Yuri blushed a little at J.J.'s voice in his back.

 So, was that what they'd been actually talking about? Was it the reason why nobody even tried to look after him for the whole afternoon? Not that he'd really gave attention about that point, but it had felt odd sometimes, with hours flying away with only the sound of TV, the screen shining in the dark and his cellphone buzzing softly near his thight from Otabek's chatting.

 His cheeks felt hot, and he doubted it was because of the heat in the room. Victor patted his shoulder again before sitting beside him. Yakov was already in place, trying to avoid every eye contact with the boy; it was obvious that the old man wasn't feeling at his place and at the same time he was fighting not to smile because it probably wouldn't be him. Being grumpy, looking grumpy, was more his way of showing his affection and Yuri perfectly knew it.

 "I, uh..."

 Yuri hesitated. Oh, shit. His painful knees just felt so weak at that moment, he was pretty happy to be sitting right now.

 "Th-thank you...," he murmured. His eyes were focusing on the cake, something chocolate flavour related if he had to guess about what it was made of. Even the shape was pretty approximate and he wondered how they manage to have such a weird shape for a simple cake. Probably the magic of noobs.

 Yakov nervously laughed, yet gently -and it ended as a long cough to hide it.

 "Eh?" J.J. scoffed. "Oh my god, I could have killed just to see your face right now, you know that? Thanks god I don't have to become a murderer."

 "Sh-shut up!"

 Laughters soon overwhelmed him. Victor was soft all the evening, like he'd never been before -or for so rare occasions and not to Yuri especially. Stuck with the three men, Yuri could only feel the soft buzz of his phone in his back pocket, but social respect always told him not to look at his phone when he was with people. He would answer Otabek later -or whoever it was. By the time, the Kazakh had probably fell asleep for long. J.J. on the other hand, gave frequent looks at his own cellphone, only checking the screen then shutting it quickly. At Victor's worried gaze, the man shrugged discreetly, then shook his head and went back to the conversation.

 The cake had been surprisingly...Good. Even if it was impossible to guess what was the real flavour in it, it did taste good. Yakov simply refused to answer their questions and the three men ended pouting and eating at the same time. It wasn't really sweet like a cake used to be and at the same time there wasn't salt in it -or at least, not a salty taste. Uh. They weren't able to get it but still, it ok. It was good and Yuri even thought about asking the recipe for his grandfather. The old man had called earlier in the afternoon when Yuri was watching Otabek's performance; sick from catching a bad flue, he was stuck at his friend's house. His voice had just been so sad in Yuri's ears, the boy didn't let himself feel bad for being alone on his birthday. His grandfather didn't deserve any reproach, and somehow he was glad that the man could take some rest, far from his family reponsabilities.

 "Hey, Yurio," suddenly said Victor. His hand pushed a little on the gift still wrapped near Yuri's plate closer to the boy. Yuri blushed a little, mumbling about how much a gift wasn't necessary and J.J. laughed. Almost too loud for Yuri not to get alled on that and he gave a death gaze of his.

 "What?"

 "Just open it, princess."

 It was loose under the paper, Yuri noted when he put his fingers on the package. It didn't take him long to rip the thin paper off, and he dig his finger into something soft. A dark fabric was inside and he caught it with both his hands, spreading it before him. A tee-shirt, a dark one actuallyeasily one size bigger than the one he'd tried to wear in the morning. He smile at the huge white tiger printed on the front, ready to attack. That wasn't bad, eh. There was another clothe in the paper, and J.J. caught it for him, doing the same as Yuri with the tee shirt to show it. It was simple, plain, black. A fucking new trousers for his training and the boy felt his face become red and awfully hot from the shame. J.J. was laughing again.

 "I don't even feel sorry," he said. "It might be a little large at first but you sure will grow again, so we don't worry about it!"

 Victor was barely holding a smile at that, nodding. "I agree. Even if it was quite nice to look at, I'll miss your boxers!"

 "Y-you--! How dare you--!"

 Before Yuri could even say anything, even if words wouldn't come and the boy was just lost in his shoes, Victor moved the rest of paper and pointed it with his chin, winking to Yuri.

 "I guess there's something else for you," he murmured.

 J.J. had suddenly stopped laughing and his sudden attention made Yuri uneasy. What was that guy's problem after all?

 Under the undone pack of clothes, there was a letter. Not something huge, a normal size, like a postal card. There was nothing written on it, nor been stamped -it hadn't been posted or anything.

 "Open it?" Victor offered as Yuri was staring at it, turning it between his fingers as if there would be something suddenly appearing on it, a clue, anything?

"Yeah yeah..."

 It was really a card. A double-sided one, folded on its middle so he had to open it to read if there was a message -there had to be something written, right? But he didn't lay it out at first, staring at the photograph on the cover. It was a rather simple scenery. A street under the snow. There was that tree. That barrier before the house.

 There were those damn red curtains behind the large windows.

 Yuri was already holding his breath at all of this. He knew that place, he knew all of this, and his heart started to beat in his chest, so hard that he wasn't sure if he wanted to open it. He didn't care about the loud silence around him -usually he would have been the one to make some noise, yelling at someone just not to drown in the heavy silence that used to make him so nauseus.

 But here, he was just surrounded by the sound of his own heart beating so hard, so hard in his ears, and the small lump about to form deep in his throat.

 When he opened it, his fingers were shaking, and he hated himself for being that weak.

 At first, he didn't read it. His eyes just followed the trail of the dark pen on the ivory thick paper. The soft loops of the letters, ready to lean on the right of the card. But soon, he was drowning on the few words written there, voiceless again.

 Victor leaned on him a little. Yuri could feel his smile in his words, even if he wasn't looking at the man at all. "Isn't it great? What are you go--Oh my god, Yuri, are you c-crying!? YAKOV PLEASE DO SOMETHING!"

 "WHAT!? J.J. DO SOMETHING!"

 "FUK YOU OLD MAN!"

 It was stupid. Yuri nodded slowly at whatever they were saying and Victor dramatically screamed. It was the most stupid situation ever. Why was he even crying? He couldn't read the words anymore because of that and it was freacking annoying. But he didn't need to read it again, the words printed on his retina.

           "Dear flower, Please, skate with me? Your bee"     

[rengiyuus]

Woah boy this is gonna be emo i lov u himchan...

 himchan is absolutely beautiful n it blows my mind how ppl can’t,, seem to see that about him hes just so divine hes unearthly n god himchan is absolutely!!! caring he puts everyone before himself n it breaks my heart tht ppl use that to their advantage because this man will go to the ends of the galaxy to please everyone around him before himself, n himchans smile is literally as ravishing as gold, its so bright and precious u just can’t help but stare in awe about it n GOSH!! This dudes laugh is like hearing church bells ring; its musical and i can hear him laugh for days on end and never get tired of it...n his hair that so perfectly and delicately frames his face makes me so mushy and his lil blush is enough to make me weak in the knees and this mans voice is full of nothing but the sweetest and richest sounds the earth has to offer, his jokes that are absolutely horrible yet so punny r always enough to make me laugh until i’m Ded n his cute lil ways of being shy (like when he hides behind his bangs, looks down, or has that bright grin on his face while his cheeks get a lil rosy) r so !!! adorable nd man even when himchan is mad hes still so cute hes like a lil babie who lost his fav toy...idk??? like how do ppl rlly see himchan for his weight,, when hes much more than that hes the most talented dude in the world 2 me and maybe im being biased bc he is my ult but everything about himchan is glorious and i practically worship the ground he walks on bc hes just so fucking out of this world...how can u not love him??? and how can u tear him down over something he can’t control when theres endless features about him 2 adore and cherish...