#im sure thats gonna go fucking wonderful
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orv adaption announcements …………..
#good goddddddd im gonna be Such a hater about them i can feel it in my bones o(~<#i could handle a shitty live action bc im sure thats what han sooyoung would have wanted but . a Shitty Animated Show ?#i dont think my heart could take it …..#but i really really hope that wont b the case bc they can do some great stuff with it#IVE SAID THIS BEFORE BUT !!!! IMAGINE THE SOUNDTRACK ………. YOU COULD GO CRAZY WITH LEITMOTIFS… ..#imo orv isnt a story that needs visuals but it could work so well with audio ……….#translating the image of bleeding stories into whispers oughhghhgh#i wonder how adaptions could approach the ambiguity between lines spoken by kim dokja and the 4th wall ……….#it’s something that’s pretty hard to convey with audio so maybe they’ll keep it silent in the audiovisual adaptions#maybe with keyboard sounds …….. oooh thatd be so cool#but i feel like the voice the reader gives the 4th wall adds another layer to it does that make sense#pretty tricky to figure out how to translate the 4th wall outside of a medium with just text#solar-talks#god i hope they do something interesting with the starstream filter on dokja bc ill b honest i didnt like how when the webtoon got to#jihye’s scene in dark castle they just smacked sparkles on him and left it at that#ok i reread it in case i got it wrong but unfortunately . yeah . those arent eyebags you gotta make him look NORMALLER fuck offff !!!!!!!!!#i know they would never do this but it would be so fucking sick if they just moved around the features of kdj’s face ever so slightly to#give him some uncanny valley vibes#i want it so bad for the live action but i know they dont see my vision orz#they dont have to end up being Exactly how i’d imagine them im just begging the adaptions to make the best use of a different medium#put some Thought into it even ..
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it's absolutely insane that the song that has the most quotes that i want to get tattooed is sandwiched between a song about skinning ryan bergara alive and a song that alludes to playing a brass instrument is like giving a blowjob
#sorry watcher if you see this. extra sorry shane if you see this.#i love puppet history so much. the duality.#btw the quotes are 'if im gonna stop this looks like a really wonderful place to do it' 'tell the critters that you love that you love em#thats enough' 'some shits just etched into the stars collamities you cant outrun' 'the sky will burn and boil the sea as mountains rend its#you and me' 'but im not worried anymore im with my favorite dinosoars' 'we're history'#and some short phrases like 'a cosmic kiss' 'the greens and blues be still my heart' that are still bouncing around my head for tattoo#designs. but yeah. i'll start with the first one and go from there lol. theres also that one hotdaga quote im thinking of getting but im not#sure. im so excited to get this tattoo though. im going to film a little vlog about designing it and getting it and probably blab about how#its meaningful to me. i cant wait for it to be on me to look at forever. its gonna be so wonderful. i hope shane gets to see it. especially#in person. that would be such a cool experience to me. especially since i got him to write the quote for me. fucking awesome#this is the first tattoo idea im 100% sure of. the song still gets me emotional almost a year later.
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do you think liam would ever tell owen that the guy who kidnapped him was planning on kidnapping him, too? because. man. i imagine that would be VERY harrowing to find out about
#hfjone#i wonder if liam would even tell owen that that was what pushed him to try and murder airy#hes certainly blunt enough#but also man. im sure hed tell the otehr contestants abt s3 at some point#but GOD. thatd be so haunting to find out abt#alice ALONE is so. it feels esp fucked up#and i think the fact that bryce knows who airy was gonna pick for him as like#a seemingly kinda nervous teenager who just.. wouldve been unlucky enough to work at this specific fast food restaurant?#i do NOT think hed like that#(we dont know much abt her personality but in the brief glimpse we get of her she seems a bit nervous so thats all im going on#but it would STILL be fucked up regardless)
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emotional support group for autistics who got called condescending and rude as kids just for responding to things directly and still not knowing how they were being mean
#what did i do#i got constantly told by my mother and step father (and his family) that i always talked like i knew better than they did or that i was#just as mature. i was just fuckjng talking what the hell did you want me to do#why do you feel attacked when a 10 year old speaks to you as an adult????? literally what#i dont know on that note sometimes its just like i dont even feel like ive aged at all#sure i have a giant explosion of time in my head just Gone from my memory because i was getting abused but like i dont feel like ive aged#or really matured ive felt like ive alwats felt#i cant relate when epople are like me when i feel all my ages or i wish i could go back to being x age or being x age everything felt so#different..like no it didnt. or im missing something?#i have never in my life felt like anything has changed. ive always been this old. there is no ''inner child'' and ive never had childhood#innocence or a nostalgia or childhood to go back to. i have no idea what any of you are talking about ever👍#ugh jst rmemebred skmething that happened with my white step dad's mother#we visited her house and she literally fucking didnt let me go (not physically) until i replied to her with Correct Granmar. what was i#doing? i was reaponding to her by saying ''yeah'' and she kept repeating ''yes'' like telling me to say yes instead of yeah and i didnt#Fucking Get It because guess what you old white cracker i barely fucking speak english and you are just saying things in an aggressive tone#like thats gonna make me get it. and i Didnt i just kept replying yrah to her yes's and then she got tired of it and we left out the door#and theeeeen i got yelled at in the car by being called disrespectful and rude by my parents. WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO?????????#those crackers never liked me LOL i literally know they didnt#ugh i rmemeber this one time my step dads father was like trying to show me some dumb boxing or karate or something punching move and he#told my mother that i was good at it because he felt i had a lot of aggression and then NY MOTHER YELLED AT ME IN THE CAR FOR IT??????#oh fucking wonder why te kid being abused mighthave aggression but she didnt Know (apart from what She was doing to me) like why would it#be my fucking fault if he thought i had aggression in me HOW IS THAT MY FAULT WHAT DIDBI DO I WAS JUST TRYING TO DO THE MOVE BECAUSE WELL#I WAS TRYING TO GET ALONG BECAUSE THATS WHAT THEY WANTED ME TO DO#she was like do you know how much that embarassed me and WHAT THE HELL HE SAID IT I DIDNT I WAS LIKE#8??? OR SOMETHING???? I DONT FUCKING KNOW!!! I DIDNT KNOW WOMAN WHAT DID YOU WANT FROM ME#mothers when they mother👍
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STOP I OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY WHILE LEARNING PIANO 😭😭😭😭😭
However! I am happy to share and am so glad you see the vision. Sorry In Advance to you and all your followers for the spam but here is a (mostly corrupted) office tour (please note the "Mine Power"-brand gym equipment):
P.S. I recall really liking The Wings of the Kirin, please enjoy!
EVERYONE OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY GROWING UP IT CAME WITH YOUR PARENTS FORCING YOU TO LEARN THE PIANO LERKJALEKJ
BUT OH MY GOD NO DON'T APOLOGIZE THIS IS LITERALLY PERFECT I thank you again for my life this is so important to me you have no idea
#fave#snap chats#'parents' more like my mom.#BUT YEAH I PLAYED ODE TO JOY ALL THE TIME GROWING UP TOO ITS WHY I HAD A STROKE AT THE END OF Y7 VLKALVJLK#getting the sims just to make mines apartment brb. fr tho why the fuck dont i have the sims thats Architecture Simulator#but more importantly i have a sick obsession with having the layout to buildings#i havent posted any of them but i have a bunch of sketches of various rooms/buildings in the RGG series#i dont imagine many people would want to see those so thats why i have them hoarded#obvi i ref them when drawing stuff but theyre also just fun to draw....#THIS type of stuff is BEYOND valuable to me tho this is my crack. my cocaine even. i live for shit like this#my dad used to be involved with architecture and real estate so i'm gonna blame him for that#BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY im saving all of these theyre so so so important to me i cant thank you enough#im sure others will greatly appreciate these as well#even if it's a bit 'corrupted' i can definitely DEFINITELY salvage these#im going to laugh if he has his own gym equipment brand. is that what his company's done this entire time#was his 'research' just gettin fuckin yolked Cant Believe This#i wonder if mine has a bedroom somewhere though i cant imagine it being in the same room as the piano. unless rich people do that.#theres just so much dead space in that area aside from the piano and it looks like to be a pretty sizeable room.. PURELY just The Piano Roo#like its fuckin luigis mansion over here. not impossible i guess. very strange thing to have. esp if its connected to the GYM#its not even in connected to the main part of the office where you can realistically be like 'lets go into the next room for piano'#you gotta cut through the gym first bro what the fuck is this#but what are those closet-esque bits behind the piano? unless im blind. what purpose would you have to put a closet in a piano room#if its sheet music you keep that under the chair or something#even through the mesh it still looks like those lead to a skinny hallway... idk im rambling#ill study these more in depth later BUT THANK YOU AGAIN#OH BUT i'm about halfway through the movie so far and im def enjoyin it !#i always like it in crime shows/movies where the answer seems Obvious at first but then as the case goes on its like#Oh God Wait. Hold On Let's Double Check#again i'm halfway through the movie but i always love it when i feel uncertain about the situation ☠️☠️#it's just fun watching all the pieces come together so yeah im def enjoyin !
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okay one level deeper in indie 80s comics and your just fucked for trying to find info online. but i thought ppl would really like this image
[ID from alt: Back pages advertisement for Jim Lawson's "Bade Biker and Orson" no. 4. A caption box reads: Orson goes underground in: The Demon Car From Hell, Part II. The art is very obscured copy of Gustave Doré illustration of the divine comedy, Virgil and Dante standing over Farinata's tomb. Orson, a cartoon frog looking character, has been physically pasted next to Farinata in the image photocopy. END ID]
Doré's original illustration, sans Orson.
[ID from alt: The illustration in much higher clarity, and fuller range of values. The full bodies and details of all subjects visible along with background details and line work. END ID]
full ad page under the cut
[ID from alt: Same image with logo, and text "no. 4" and "shipping June 1st" END ID]
#some shit#turbles...#OK TO RB........#i dont have a tip jar and i wouldnt want one but pleaseeeeeeeee. this was such a funny moment to have.#IF u actually kno art history shit OR dante shit and ive made a mistake here lol. come for my like i guess. im just a humble turtle blogger#but anyway truly this was such a joyful image... i was like. what the fuck is bade biker#well its not available digitally thats for damn sure...#but then i focused on the art.... and i was gonna describe it as 'a dark gothic illustration'#but i thought. it looks really specific... i wonder if i can do better than that.... and divine comedy seemed like an easy place to start..#SHOUT THE FUCKS OUT to. wikiart... 🙏🏻#and natch also the place im reading these comics did not even make good quality screenshotting very easy....#look at the fucking. xerox decay on this bad boy adkjdfffa#happy ides of march but fuck that. join me in.#orson goes to hell.#and now for real. i gotta go to bed#wifi blogs mirage#wiggles hand. kinda
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#i cant read anything without thinking of world war 3#the world is Such a mess rn#youve got israel and palestine w the us euro india whoever else pushing for israel meanwhile other side youve got#iran pushing for hamas and mujahedeen from dif regions showing up#all while zelensky the biggest fan of the us on the planet supports israel while hamas thanks ukraine for sending them weapons???#youve got what's happening in armenia w azerbaijan and turkey and thats a whole fucking mess too#youve got ukraine another geopolitical nightmare#china seems to be gearing up for shit in taiwan#i keep hearing about baddd conflicts going on in india and im sure kashmir isnt great#and im sure pakistan siding w palestine and india w israel will go great#youve got kosovo getting bad again and it might get worse and turn into a whole thing#great!!!! wonderful!! brilliant brillaint state of affairs#how the fuck are we gonna avoid a world war exactly#could this species for once stop fucking slaughtering and opressing each other maybe#we never should have invented weapons like the ones we have. never. guns bombs atomic bombs airplanes drones none of it#we should have stuck with fucking bows and spears and swords and other shit like that
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...well, i now officially know i've lost weight.
Like... a lot? a lot more than i had thought?
Which is. Odd because honestly pretty much everything still feels like it fits about the same...
I guess it explains why i've been more cold?!
+ also i dont know Why it's so much... if i start eating like a normal human being again i don't... really *want* to go over where i started? :/ i guess i'd maybe be fine w/ being about the same because i know it won't be That big of a difference. Or i don't think it will anyways? Hm...
#ed tw#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#like um . it is a very significant change since the last time i weighed myself#(june 2022 apparently)#and without knowing whether its the semi-consistent excersize or the absolute dogshit fuck diet i dont want to change what im doing......#dont give urself an ed on purpose its really not worth it XD#morbid curiousity but i wonder if im at a 'normal' bmi range now? like eh...#numbers btw. its like 20 pounds dropped so#a LOT for me#like this is where i set my goal initially.......#i shouldnt make it worse and set something lower but i kind of want to..................#[hitting brain with broom] no. bad. stop it .#i guess cause its spread out over a year its not As extreme but still . . .#not sure whether to feel accomplished or not as mostly my philosophy has been#‘stop being disorder you piece of fuck’#i. e; do my best not to worry about it#but u know. disorder . kinda like sh never gonna leave me all that shit#idk where im going with this from june 2022 to feb 2023 things were about the same but then a Lot changed so that is also smth to consider#different circumstances... i live off sweet things and yet remain snackies-less now :pensive:#(<- thats to put it lightly)#anyways anyways tag ramble ending curiousity getting the better of me bye
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i cant believe the day but i finally got a full tower pc. bought it already built and at a considerable discount of some 320 dollars off. its fucking huge and theres so many things going on inside... i was initially planning on choosing the parts myself but finding the graphics card was so hard and everyone else convinced me to just buy it built and honestly? good. id probably have fucked this up so badly by myself
i cant use it yet bc i took too long to buy the monitor that was also on sale and now its regular price -_- tho i managed to find a discount used one for now. well see how that goes since ill get it tomorrow. i tested it on out living room tv and it had some kaspersky thingy open and like thats so cute. i hope they left some treats in the browsing history for me to search through before i wipe it clean
#its a hexer case and wouldnt you guess the front has a hexagonal pattern. so pretty..#it came with 3 fans installed there too that have a cmyk color style to them and it looks quite neat. im thinking of buying some leds to pu#inside the case to go with my keyboard tho idk if id go that far tbh (< gamer rot is setting in. im not immune to pretty lighting..)#its also got a lot of unused space inside. im thinking of making more sculptures to put in. though idk if thatd be safe for it#bc cold porcelain is glue and water. what if it evaporates inside and suddenly everythings covered in a glue film#i wonder if varnish would help? the transparent nail polish sure didnt do shit it came off like 2 days after sculpting the rw slug sleeping#which like yeah of course. its nail polish. but i didnt expect it to flake since all it does is sleep on top of my laptop keyboard#i need miniature glass cake cover tops to encapsule every sculpture inside for safety#looking at it still no wonder these are called towers gotdamn its legit so huge..#it looks awkward tho bc i cant fully make it glue to the wall bc of the cables so its like. awkwardly a bit in front of the wall#im scaared as to how to tell if it ever gets too hot. on a laptop u just press ur head against the left half and feel how hot it is#i think im gonna need software for this.. sigh. tho maybe ill never get to that point since its supposed to be decent#AND its not 8 years old + the 3 fans and gpu fan and cpu fan. surely thats enough. the case even has space for more than that!!#the acrylic side reflects my keyboard too. so niceys. stimulation for my creature eyes#my desk is gonna be so fucked up when i have to organize everything too bc the one i have now is perfecly laptop-oriented#it sits on a custom wooden desk and the keyboard+drawing tablet sit below. but theres a shelf on top of my desk thats too low for the>#>normal monitor to sit to so i wont be able to use the custom desk. and i dont even know what ill do with my laptop either#finally a good change in my sad life routine fr. i cant wait to play watchdogs on this and overgrowth and other ones#AND LAGLESS KRITA SMUDGE ENGINE BRUSHES!!! AND DOUBLE BRUSHES. THEYRE SO LAGGY#A N D ACTUAL FULL HD NORMAL MONITOR. maybe that will get me to not draw in small canvases anymore#now im anxious i just want the day to be over to get the monitor tomorrow aouugh.. just bc i started coding my resources neocities page#dextxt#<the 'major life events' ((sorta)) tag returns. one for the books.. if something bad happens.. itll be here to remind me of the good times
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new 2d sonic games coming out this fall apperently ?
#not sure how to feel abt it just watched the trailer. im a modern 'classic sonic' hater sorry.#it just doesnt quite capture what i enjoy abt the og games as well as stuff like advance and rush does (well those more take that and build#it up into its own thing (rush especially) but whatever. it still carries on some general things i enjoy about classic sonic design and#all the more recent stuff ive played has not really been my thing. idk what physics engine theyre using but if its the retro engine i will#probably not like it that shit messes with my muscle memory so bad im sorry. i dont like it i wish i did#also the general visual design/art direction just isnt my thing! im not into that kinda stuff ive always disliked it to an extent#ESPECIALLY in 2d it feels very visually overwhelming but that is probably just a me thing.#also idk if the sound design in the trailer reflects what the game is going to sound like but.did not like it . again a personal preference#so i guess im leaning kinda negative overall MAN i hate that . why am i like this lol sorry#i love sonic games i really do but i just Do Not care for the Big Stuff theyve been doing lately it isntreally my thing#the older stuff just plays to my tastes better u_u#also another thing classic sonic gameplay w 3d models has always felt so ? stilted?#rush doesnt count its its own beast. stilted is probbaly The last thing id use to describe its presentation LMAO#but like. all the sonic generations onwards stuff just feels Weird to look at theres no realkick to it. hell i feel like this abt a few#other 2.5d games that are. 2.5d in the visual sense.it just doesnt click right in a lot of cases#so what im syaing is . 3d bad 2d good /JOKE#the multiplayer seems interesting wonder how thats gonna be handled. also im guessing amy plays how she does in origins here#not sure how she plays there but i m glad to actually see her playable in more stuff! i hope her playstyle is similar to her advance 1#gameplay i love that shit so much geneuinely. its a lot of fun to mess around w#i wanna say im sure the game will be fine but also..... its sonic......... theyre always gonna figure out some way to fuck shit up#<- i say that somewhat lovingly but also it is pretty frustrating since most of it does stem from management issues and time crunch. sigh#okay im just rambling abt sonic nonsense now sorry. i try not to get too invested in everything anymore it was really draining when i was#actively trying to keep up w everything but sometimes smthn comes upand my brain goes back into Sonic Mode /silly#inquisitivewaltz.txt#oh god these tags are so long. im so sorry hgfdhsjgfdhs
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can't fucking believe vent is still down. where else am i gonna yell about being ill
#anyway it is Day Two and. i feel better in some ways but worse in others#had the worlds most disrupted night of sleep and now i'm coughing a lot more than yesterday and it sucks#but my throat feels less sore for sure. feels like my body is fighting this thing off super hard 💪💪💪💪 shame about the full body aching#and overall lack of energy. ooouugghhh and the lost voice of course. but this always fucking happens#i'm gonna have to pass on games night tonight if i'm still coughing a lot and/or still missing my voice#but aaaauugghhh the love of my friends will surely heal me like nothing else. unless they make me laugh and send me into a coughing fit#rambling#my god yeah thats one of the worst parts of being ill. cant watch anything that makes me laugh. im fucking dying of boredom here#sure there's other stuff to watch but no funnies and no video games when that's all i want rn. havent watched any more flapjack in DAYS#it's nowhere near as bad as covid so this is entirely unnecessary but i am once again getting thr urge to document my symptoms#with a god damn spreadsheet. but it's not as complex at all so eh.#i can't say too much about how much better i'm feeling just yet tbh bc i'm still back in bed hfkdhgkdh i can walk sure#but i need to go downstairs and make breakfast soon which is the REAL first hurdle#also the question of am i ready for toast again or do i need to stick to porridge just to be safe#not gonna lie. i didn't love the noodles i had yesterday so i'm wondering if i'll have the appetite for something else#i want a sandwich so fucking bad but i don't want to eat dry bread at the same time. aaauuggghhh#my sibling offered me a hot chocolate last night and i had to turn that down bc chocolate plus cold for me is a big no#but aaauugghhh a nice warm drink probably would’ve been rlly nice#i return once again to announce that got damn! i feel notivesbly better than i didn an hour ago and my voice is like 30% back!#which means that by tonight i might very well be at a functional enough level to hang out with friends after all#i can always dip if my energy levels tank again or whatever but like honestly hanging out with them is like. i need that#the last two days havent been great and i miss them and we have a lot to talk about so yeah i will do everything in my power#to be there tonight. but i will not force myself or push myself too far. bc i am the king of self care 💪💪💪#god sorry back again but. it continues to fascinate me how any kind of illness affects me in the same ways consistently regardless of what#kind of illness it is??? right now i have whats mainly a cough which is honestly rare for me when i get ill#it's usually more in the nose department and sometimes the throat but rarely the chest#and yet 9 out of 10 times i lose my voice. i Always struggle with low energy (altho thats a problem outside of being ill too jfdjgdhfhd)#have a hard time falling or staying asleep and i get nauseous if i sleep laying down enough#but also i am the king of hard and fast aka i get like 24 terrible hours and then recovery is super quick. i'll be back to 100% health in#less than a week. my poor fucking step dad has been in stage one for a WEEK it's really awful. but i have the power of youth on my side 💪
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There's also the impulse to be like "women ain't shit" but that's a lie I love our women. Not women as a whole's fault that one of them turned out a selfish bastard of a coward.
I just need to find a woman who doesn't treat me like That. Get me a good butch. I need me a good butch.
#speculation nation#id love a good butch who can pick me up and help move my furniture#and who is so sweet and treats me like im someone valuable (& not immediately replaceable ...)#the bar is actually so low. god why do i keep ending up dating assholes?#ex before this ex wasnt an asshole. i was the asshole in that situation.#but that's where the whole. wanting to find someone right for me comes in.#god 'ex' really is such a vague term for me. i got bad ex goth ex uhh other good ex but still sucked#nothingburger exes 1 2 3 4#and the gay awakening ex who i really shouldve given more attention to but unfortunately i was a stupid 16 year old#and broke up with her for my bad ex. alas.#and then theres milquetoast ex and uhmmm. well i actually dont know what im going to label my most recent one.#i dont think it's fully sunk in yet what happened. bc it really was so sudden.#i last saw her on thursday and everything was normal and nice. just like pretty much the whole of the 6 months with her.#and then she started hanging out with the coworker i guess. and the rest is history.#i think she lied about being busy spending time with friends to excuse why she was so distracted on the weekend.#she was probably busy spending time with that girl. who she apparently feels like shes suffocating if shes not in the same room as her#it does suck in a lot of ways. but also with her friends. i was trying rly hard to spend time with them and be liked by them.#one of them's moving into my building this next year. across from my unit. so i wonder how thats gonna go.#my ex mentioned how she'd be spending twice as much time here then just last saturday.#and now. well. like fuck she's coming in here anymore. but i wonder if i'll see her going to visit her friend.#id been kind of excited for it. looking forward to spending time with a neighbor too. but probably not anymore.#i do wonder what her friends will think. i hope she tells them the truth and they chew her out for being such an asshole.#literally breaking up with me over text. who fucking does that??? she didnt have the guts to hear me cry???#i'll make sure she sees the full force of my displeasure when she drops my gifts off tomorrow.#she used to like how rough around the edges i am. well she's gonna see just how rough around the edges i Really am.#i kind of. dont really want to see her. but i also do. i want her to look me in the face and talk to me#to see who it is she's dropping. to see how it has affected me. even if she didnt see my heartbreak as it happened.#i laid into her Hard so she knew just how badly she hurt me. so that she would feel even a fraction of my hurt.#so she would feel Guilty. she apologized over and over. said she knew she'd regret it. but she just Had to do it.#'this will be my life's regret' then why'd you do it? fucking impulsive dumbass. what bullshit.
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writing down some notes for bellum traits/speculative biology/whatever so here's a couple so far
he's cold blooded but can't die due to extreme temperatures, it just makes it harder for him to function.
amphibious in the sense that he can survive in both water and air, though he doesn't really need to breathe, if anything he mostly interacts with water and air through traversal differences.
he does move like a squid, he can just float around but to move faster he does need to move his tentacles for slight propulsion and steering, and does intake and jet out water or air for some extra speed. he is not literally a squid creature but he is very similar.
he's got little barbs on the undersides of his tentacles (similar to the texture of a cat's tongue) which help with grabbing onto and holding things.
he can pull his main eye down into his body if he wants to use his mouth as... a mouth, or when he creates those little goop things or otherwise to spit out that purple substance.
#salty talks#bellum#speculative biology might be too lofty or. deep? a term for this i just wanna figure out what's going on with him yknow#like im not trying to be scientific or anything with this this is like. a personal passion project kinda thing not an assignment#but i lean a little into scientific terminology when it gets weird or awkward to me so whatever#idk if i'll share images or w/e of the final doc or just leave it to be expressed through fics#bc essentially these are notes ofr things that i want to show in fics (primarily the bellum x linebeck one. i need a fucking name for it)#also i like bellum and think hes a funny shape#constantly thinking abt that beak thing he has that seemingly never does anything but if you remember it#in context of him possessing linebeck and how he goes about doing that its like. oh. ...oh#its never addressed in any form but i wonder how the people who like animated that scene and stuff personally thought of it#in general i wonder how the pople who made ph felt abt bellum what ideas did they have that they never got around to sharing yknow#im not gonna act like it'd be a treasure trove he's a very nothing villain but i wonder if there were some sparse opinions and ideas abt hi#anyways DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT THAT. BELLUMS BEAK THING. AND SPECIFICALLY HOW HE ATTACHES ONTO LINEBECK. HUH. HUH.#anyways i dont think bellum is like a squid creature if anything he's more just like some amalgamation of cephalopods as a demon#which is funny bc i am using a lot of irl squid characteristics to inform a lot of this stuff#its like half no hes not a squid he's a demon and half no hes not a squid he doesnt line up with them enough#i can see him as like a monstrous bastardization of a squid but nah hes not a squid hes just squidlike i think#im not too deep into my notes but im not sure how much i'll need considering the god/demon/magical being side of him yknow#i'll do what i need for my purposes#you can probably maybe see me getting awkward with some terminology with the last one but maybe thats just me feeling it lol#this is like half speculative stuff and half just headcanon yknow but whatever we got stuff here
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i fear im gonna have to start fucking killing people
#finally scheduled a doctors appointment like a week ago which is at the beginning of july and ive been trying to get a refill on my T#cause if you have an appt theyre supposed to give me my fucking meds so i can make it to the appt without going off T#but ive already not been taking T for the past 2 weeks cause im out of doses and theyre being confusing as fuck and not giving me my t#and im just fucking wondering whether theyre gonna give me it before my appointment or not but they keep beating around the fucking bush#telling me (simultaneously) that its pended/denied/accepted/filled/expired/etc LIKE HELLO???? ARE YOU FUCKING GIVING IT TO ME OR NOT???#JUST GIVE ME ONE CLEAR PIECE OF INFORMATION PLEASE GOD JUST ONE FUCKING DIRECT COMMUNICATION I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHERE IM AT#like if you guys keep dicking around im gonna miss it for another week! and if you guys are fucking cunts like i think you might be#then im gonna be off t for another 4 fucking weeks. on top of the 2 weeks ive already been off it.halting my transition for no fucking poin#forcing me to go thru mood swings and shit for no fucking reason. if my period comes back im actually gonna start killing.#6 weeks off t it easily could come back! and then how long will it take for me to kill my period again? how many months?#this is just making me fucking pissed like theyre being so obtuse and fucking idiotic frankly. either reject my refill or dont.#stop making me fucking guess. like cause if i have to wait 4 weeks then whatever. it is what it is ill still be pissed#but im more pissed rn that theyre jerking my ass around giving me conflicting information getting my hopes up and shit when im pretty sure#theyre just gonna reject it in the end.#AND DURING PRIDE MONTH...#anyways guess im gonna try to rummage up an injection out of my old vials cause thats my only fucking hope rn... healthcare industry kys
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lightly defending Toshiro while also fully understanding Laois frustrations. as a bitch who let teachers call me the wrong name all through high school cos it was kinda funny
#toy txt post#i knew it wasnt their fault they just dealt with So Many Names and i couldve corrected them and i used to#but the thing is that it just kept happening w so many teachers??#so i was like fine whatever idc that much. but also they did usually remember my name if there was someone in the class who actually#had the wrong name they usually called me. i think bc it would stick in their heads more since they had to differentiate so instead of#looking at me and going [letter] name......[common name starting with that letter that isnt mine]#theyd look at me and go [letter name].....but theres 2 names in that class with that letter and theyre different and this one is Not the#easy more common one. [gets name correct]#what really would throw me is when theyd try a DIFFERENT but i think still more common name with the same letter and then lile#like*. sorry bud im not used to that one i cant help u there#my favorite was the print production teacher who USUALLY GOT MY NAME RIGHT (i think smaller class size helped?)#who called me the more common one that im not used to and then stared at me in puzzlement and he was like#why did i do that. thats not your name. and i was just like lmao idk bro#anyway. this has been a really annoying way to discuss this event without actually revealing my name but#its not quite a deadname now but like. as far as yall are concerned im Toy. if you know me irl you almost certainly know it tho#and if youve been following me long enough you could probably know it cos i was less careful about it when i was younger#if youre like burningly curious and we're mutuals u can dm me ig and ill tell u just dont call me that lol#oh if u have me on fb u know it for sure unless u forgot and you see me (rare and unlikely on fb) nd youre like who the fuck is that#it probably wouldnt be hard to guess even. but whatever. if u feel the need to guess (why) just do me a favor and do it via#dm or ask or smth lmao#ALSO: uhhh i try not to tag this anymore cos it feels like its not coming across the way its intended and it has a weird vibe to tag these#days but i feel like this post could use the 'Im a white person this experience im referencing is with a layer of white privilege#and i understand that for many ppl of color or ppl with non english names this happens and its less funny#altho i think due to the vastness of human experience there are probably ppl with non english names who have this happen but it doesnt#affect them strongly and they just laugh it off and part of me wonders how much of that has to do with how much you LIKE and Identify with#your given name WHICH i ALSO recognize can be a more nuanced experience for someone with a non english name thats like#got cultural significance ETC. okay THERE. the annoying disclaimer that pisses everyone off bc everyone HATES disclaimers now.#just imagine. i could be writing these disclaimers for a FICTIONAL ROMANCE BOOK IVE WRITTEN. and wouldnt#that piss you off more? new disclaimer to piss you off more: i understand this is my personal blog and im not obligated to provide a#fuck i was gonna do another disclaimer as a bit but i ran out of tags! fuck okay bye. youll have to make up the joke disclaimer
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tw: size kink, sex talk.
when sukuna sees you for the first time as his true form, hes even more in love. he has to look down or even crouch down to your height and is still barely eye level. his arms suffocate you, and his hand is bigger than yours.
hes been waiting for this, holy fuck. he cant get over how small and beautiful you are. he only wondered how strong you could be now? can you even land a single blow on him?
eventually, you did, while using his OWN weapon? how you managed to do that, hes amazed. and youre overtop of him and hes finally healed, but he is still so intrigued by how you are able to do it with his state now.
“you truly are worth my time!” he laughs maniacally, smushing you face in his larger hand. hes so much bigger than you too, that hadnt left his mind during the whole fight, probably why he slightly even doubted you– never again.
so now hes got you in a compromised state, two arms on your hips and two arms on your shoulders. he barely got the tip in, you somewhat suck him in, and hes just… in awe.
your body is just astonishing to him, and hes grinning ear to ear.
“hoo fuck!” hes growling, is he even human? hes not, and he spits a fat glob on your pretty cunt. thats what does it for you, and hes able to get about halfway inside you, your tummy bulging and he sees the outline of his fat dick, dont even remind yourself about the second dick you may have to take either in your cunt or your ass. and thats a whole new level.
hes head over heels, over the moon, debating on would he allow you to boss him around for taking him? your almost at the base of his dick, and what sounds like degradation is him praising you.
“youre such a fucken whore! look at you, takin all of me!”
“im gonna have to be so so gentle, or i might just fuck up your uterus..”
and he’s going so slow as he can, (newsflash, its barely slow!) and youre biting your lip as it slightly hurts because of the sudden stretch, although having experience. hes wiping your tears with his tongue, kissing your cheeks as his belly mouth is eating and lapping up your clit as hes balls deep, so you have some type of lube.
hes laying on top of you after having a strangled climax, only making sure he pulls out and nuts on your tits (he doesnt believe you should take his cum yet, you could barely take a few strokes.) and hes overwhelming.
#jjk x reader#jjk spoilers#jjk#jjk x you#jjk smut#jjk leaks#sukuna x you#sukuna ryomen smut#jjk sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#jujutsu kaisen#jujustsu kaisen x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk ryomen
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