#incredibly in love with this artists work

[phoen1xr0se]

The FINAL chapter of Don't Fall Away From Me is up on AO3!! (M)

Artist Credit: @mistysblueboxstuff

Chapter Summary: It ends, as it started, in a garden.

Author's Note: I have too much to say to leave it here, I am halfway across the country right now, travelling to Skokholm Island to spend almost a whole week with puffins and being totally off-grid and offline, so I will just dial it back to say that I am incredibly grateful for every bit of love, appreciation and every comment that has been given to me, they have pulled me through some incredibly dark times and I am beyond grateful for every single one of you. It has been more painful than I expected to finally let go of this story, of my Crowley and Aziraphale and especially my Muriel, but I hope you enjoy the ending to their story (although an ending for us, perhaps a beginning for them...)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, for everything. I adore you.

[starnightlover]

Hi. Sorry, I just really feel like complaining. Obviously you can ignore this, I just have nowhere else to word vomit lol. I've been trying to shift since 2019. I've gotten into the void state for like 20 seconds but got too freaked out/excited and lost stability before I could manifest or shift anywhere. I feel like I'm going crazy. I've done the whole thing of pasting sticky notes with affirmations all over my apartment, had meditated for an hour or more a day for weeks at a time, listened to subliminals 24/7 and obvious tried all the classic methods like the raven method, julia method, etc, etc. I've had multiple lucid dreams where I tried to make portals and I've even had a lucid dream (or I guess I shifted) where I saw a "centre" for shifting with a bunch of islands and floating petals that we used as transportation between islands. I got a whole tour by some guide and he showed me other lives I'm currently living. That was like a year ago, and I haven't manifested anything significant or went anywhere since then. I'm going through a really tough time right now. I wouldn't have gone on like this if I didn't believe in it, but I'm just feeling really beaten down. I'm exhausted and frustrated.

Hi lovely, I'm so sorry you feel this way.

It’s understandable. But remember all the lucid dreams you’ve had and the void states that you’ve been in. They’re a reflection of your ability for shifting. You’ve been incredibly close before, and your subconscious mind is capable of doing so. You can take a break if you want, because shifting requires a healthy amount of persistence. Just remember that no matter how long of a break you have, you’ve come really far already. The void state is one step away from shifting. And don’t forget your lucid dream, where you basically saw your ability to change realities. Don’t take my word for granted. Just think about it. You can do it, you do have the abilities, all you have to do is keep going. You can take a small break if you want to rest, but don’t let yourself lose all your progress. Stay determined, stay motivated, don’t lose your abilities. You can do this!!

You’ve come so far, and you’ve been in the final stages. Don’t think about how it’s been years without a single shift. It’s been years where you’ve learned techniques, you’ve learned about yourself, you’ve honed in your shifting abilities. Just because you haven’t shifted in years doesn’t mean you’ve made no progress. This is just the next step in your shifting journey. Go forward. Take that step. Shift like nothing’s stopping you. You’re so close. You’ve had enough time to think about it. You’ve been here, wanting to get to your desired reality for all this time. You haven’t given up on it yet. You’ve kept coming back hoping, trying, dreaming, wanting to shift to the reality you want and finally be with your hard work! Why would you stop now? You owe it to yourself to keep trying. Don’t give up, because it has always been your dream to shift.

Your determination, drive, motivation, and dedication to shifting is so praiseworthy. It's been years since you started this journey, and you haven't given up! You've persisted for this long and you've gotten close so many times, it's almost impossible for you to not have enough abilities to shift realities. Remember all the things you've seen and experienced while trying to shift realities, all the things you've gone through and the efforts of hard work that you've put into shifting realities. Don't give up now. You just have to keep going. You can do it, I believe in you!

Keep going. Don’t stop now.

I mean, just think about it: you possess this incredible power within you to shape your own existence. You're not just a passive observer in the grand theater of life; you're the playwright, the director, and the star actor all rolled into one.

You see, the universe is like this vast, infinite canvas, and you? You're the artist putting forth the brush. Every thought, every belief, every intention you hold is like a stroke on that canvas.

Now, here's the kicker: you have the ability to shift to any reality you choose. It's not some distant, unattainable dream—it's within your awareness right here, right now. Reality-shifting isn't this Herculean task reserved for a select few; it's as easy as changing your mind.

You are the god of your reality, lovely!!! You have the power to shift!!! It's not about waiting for the stars to align or some external force to swoop in and save the day. It's about realizing that the power you seek has been within you all along. So, embrace it. Own it. Know that you are the creator of your own destiny. And when doubts creep in or challenges arise, remember this: you are god, and reality-shifting is as easy as flipping the script. You've got this. After all, you are god.

And remember! You don't actually need specific methods to shift realities; it's about tapping into your innate power as a being that is pure consiousnious not attached to any body, mind, or reality! . Every moment, you're making choices that shift you to a different reality, and reality-shifting to your DR is just as easy! It's just bevomi b aware of it. While methods and techniques can be helpful tools, they're just that—tools! The real magic happens when you tap into your own inner wisdom and intuition, trusting yourself to allow the process to unfold organically. Embrace your innate creativity and intuition, and watch as your reality begins to shift in ways you never thought possible.

Now just remember my love, to keep on visualizing, keep on affirming, and most importantly keep persisting!!!! . And, be gentle with yourself along the way. Shifting may not happen overnight, but each step you take brings you closer to your DR. So hold onto hope, and know that your breakthrough is just around the corner.

[the-tech-turn]

Artistic Intrest

Tech x reader

Word count: 807 words

Summary: While on a supply run, Tech discovers your interest in art.

Warnings: None just fluff (let me know if there's anything I missed)

A/n: This is my first fanfic, so it may be a bit cringey, and the dialogue may seem off. I do accept constructive criticism because I want to improve, but I don't accept disrespect. This is also my first time writing Tech, so he may seem a bit off.

It was a chaotic week. The job Cid gave us was difficult, and we all needed some rest. Unfortunately, rations were low, so a supply run was necessary. Hunter said that two people should go since there wasn't much to pick up, so there was no need for everyone to go. You volunteered, and luckily for you, Tech chose to accompany you. Tech the man you've slowly grown to love in a different way than how you loved the others. You begrudgingly accepted your feelings after realizing they weren't planning to leave anytime soon.

You and Tech dress in civi clothes and walk towards the nearby town. Tech decides to fill the empty space with his curious thoughts as you walk. You were so invested in his words that you barely realized you two were in town.

You looked around in wonder. It's been so long since you've seen a place as calm as this. Little did you know Tech was also in awe of the environment, particularly how the lights enhance your charm.

You two wandered the market looking for food stands. Maybe you could find some ingredients to make homemade food instead of flavorless rations. But before you could ponder that thought you caught a glimpse of paintings hung on a stand. You stopped to try to get a better view of the illustrations.

Tech stopped confused by your sudden action. He noticed you were looking at something. He turns expecting to see some sort of potential threat but calms to find nothing dangerous. Instead, finding art hung on a stand. He sees your desire to get a better view, so he asks if you'd like to go closer.

Excited, you squeal a yes before grabbing his hand and heading over.

Wait, grabbing his hand? Tech pondered. You must've been very excited.

You, with Tech in hand, over to the stand. The painting that catches your eye is one of a bright sky gradient with a lake and a cabin. The detail was incredible, and the artwork appeared to be made of oil paint.

As you examined the work, Tech couldn't help but see the admiration sparkling in your eyes.

The owner of the stand then walked up to you and struck up a conversation.

"You like the painting?"

"Yes, I do. It is wonderful!" you reply.

"Why, thank you! I painted it myself."

"Really! It's beautiful. You captured the tranquility of the forest perfectly!"

"Well, are ya gonna buy it?"

You quickly deny saying that you were only looking since it must've been out of your

budget. The clerk hums in understanding them

walks off to speak to other customers. You continued to look at the other canvases.

There were many portraits and landscape paintings. They were each painted using a different medium. Each is skillfully created.

Each with their own story of how and why they were made. Each symbolizing something important to the artist. As Tech observed you, he found your

appreciation for art endearing. Although, he does not recall a time when you had expressed much interest in such works. Sure, you'd bring it up here and there, but never had you shown how thrilling you found it. He

couldn't help but wonder why.

You finally snapped out of the trance and realized just how exhausted you were.

"Let's finish the supply run. Why don't we." You suggest.

Tech agrees, and you two begin to walk when you realize that your fingers are still

interlocked with Tech's. "Oops, sorry Tech I… I forgot I grabbed your hand." You laugh off.

"It is alright."

You two continue to walk, picking up everything on the list.

You both begin your walk home when Tech

begins a conversation. "The paintings seemed to catch your eye," he begun, "I do wonder why you hadn't brought up this interest before?"

"Well, you took a second to think," I guess I never really had to bring it up.. you know."

"Is it something you do not enjoy speaking of?"

No! I like to talk about this stuff! I just..." He looks at you expectantly. "Don't really know people who wanna talk about this stuff," you mumble.

A silence falls over you two.

"Then I have not done a good job in showing my interest."

"What?"

"I would like to hear what you have to say."

" Really!”

"Yes, I would."

You finally had an opportunity to share your knowledge with a willing listener, and we're not going to waste it.

You began talking about different techniques and mediums, which ones you favor, and answered any questions he had. Time flew by fast for both of you, and you were nearing the Marauder.

Tech was fascinated with your enthusiasm on this topic. He knew then and there that he wanted to listen to you more and more after this.

A/n: Thanks for reading! I hope you guys are willing to check out my future works.

[hazzybat]

So I wrote a fic inspired by this incredible art by @flananjan and @darkcreamz95 !

Jan is a painting. The man he is based off tells the artist of his love for another man, a man Jan has never gazed upon.

He fell in love with a man he's never seen and hopes he can one day meet.

[laurfilijames]

"I'm gonna say something. Are you listening?"- Frankie "Catfish" Morales, Triple Frontier

Good. Thanks Frankie.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately.

About fandom in general, interactions or lack thereof, how something you can feel so happy and passionate about can make you sad at the same time.

The idea of no longer sharing my fics has also been something that's crossed my mind on numerous occasions, but at the end of the day I WANT to share them. I am proud of them and I figure if they make me this happy, I hope they can make someone else happy too.

I continue to trek on, trying to compartmentalize my feelings and press on, creating fics I think others will enjoy as well, and praising the gorgeous man who plays gorgeous characters whose stories I love to change or extend.

Recently, I've felt guilt. Guilt that I haven't been creating and posting enough things for you to indulge in. And then I remember that in the last 4 weeks, I wrote and posted 3 fics.

3 fics where a majority of the reblogs are my own, and most of the notes are likes.

I'm feeling this way because of the lack of interaction. I'm not blaming or pointing fingers or trying to extend any guilt to any of you (and thank you endlessly to those who do reblog and comment and send messages and have conversations about them 💗) But I can safely say that this is a widespread issue across all fandoms alike.

It's disheartening. People leave and give up and have their creativity crushed to the point they no longer participate or share their wonderful art.

I came across a post that I reblogged yesterday that added another level onto all of this.

Artists and writers having to "market" and promote their work in hopes it'll help drum up excitement for what they have coming up.

As if taking the time and energy to create that fic of piece of art isn't enough, now we have to work like a full marketing team in hopes we will get a few more reblogs or comments.

I have seldom participated in tag games where you share snippets of WIPs etc because more often than not, the response to them are *crickets*. It's embarrassing and gives off that "no one is interested so why bother sharing it" vibe.

We shouldn't have to work that hard to get feedback on the things we share.

I know, and respect, that some people experience comment anxiety, but I promise you that if you're able to, whether it be a string of emojis or keysmashes or even a gif, you will be making a difference.

This happened to me yesterday.

Right when I felt like it's all fruitless, someone swooped in with a comment that gave me hope and reminded me why I do it. And it was on my least popular (and personal favourite) series to boot.

Because of this simple act of communication, my hope and motivation has been restored.

Now I know I'm going to get people saying "you should write for yourself" (I do) and I shouldn't rely on others to keep me motivated (I don't, I have Charlie Hunnam for that) but it's such a key component to all of this and I think most creators can agree to that.

So please, for the love of fandom and the things you love (the actors, the characters, the shows or films) PLEASE INTERACT WITH THE ARTISTS AND WRITERS WHO CREATE INCREDIBLE ART AND FICS FOR THEM.

You may not realize what an effect you have, but I promise you, you do, and it may even help save your favourite artist from abandoning it all.

[sicc-nasti]

DELIVER TRUE WHEN YOU MAIL WITH BLU

He gets your intel where it needs go - today! BLU COURIER: DELIVERS ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, AT ALL COST! Mann Co guarantee*!

*Mann Co is not liable for lost mail, delays, accidental deaths, missing pieces, extra limbs, haunted packages, exploding packages, possessed weapons, monkeys jumping out of packages, monkeys with guns jumping out of packages, etc. (Please refer to the complete list in your Mann Co issued work manual) By using our mail services you agree to risks which are expanded upon in contract.

--------- Lovely second piece I commissioned Iyel on Twitter for. Pleassse check out their art. They're truly stunning. RED VERSION

[velvetsart]

some pet portraits from 2021 that i dont think i posted, on the left is Angus and on the right is Momma Mora (Angus’ mom). they were 2 out of 5 pet portraits i did for a lovely client. she has 4 rescue kitties and one dog and we came up with outfits to match their personalities. challenging but fun !!

[pretty-dianxia]

Art by: im_serji_ - Original Post - Permission to Repost

Please don't modify or edit this work, its commercial use is forbidden. If you liked this work, check the artist's site and give it some love there (⸝⸝ᵕ ◡ ᵕ⸝⸝)੭⁾⁾♡

[ashiftingworkshop]

Hi hello today is a very VERY important day and that's because

It's @territorial-utopia and I's Five Year Anniversary!!!!!

I've known and loved this fantastic human for five years and it feels insane to me- So much has happened in that time span and with my darling by my side, well, they make all the struggles worth fighting through.

I can't wait to see them in person again, and someday, always see them in person 💖💖💖

But! Here's to another five years of all the love, laughter, tears, and fun little stories we make together/for each other!!

I love you Terri!!!

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

oh yeah did i mention i was writing for a monkie kid zine? check it-

 preorders open July 1st, the twitter is @//LMKFanzine. they’re just finishing up contributor spotlights so feel free to check out if you see any artists or writers you recognize.

[himawanai]

HOW could i forget one of my favourite bocchi fan mvs

this ones's a doozy. pls watch it to the end

[butchsophiewalten]

Man this is so random but this theory is stuck in my head and I wanna see how other people feel about it because I don't see people talk about it a lot (I have no clue if the link will go through properly since I've never put a link in a ask box)

https://www.tumblr.com/art-w0rm/667910993425350656/theory-time

Oh god not this theory again. I really truly try not to be mean to people for no good reason on this blog, but this theory is literally one of the stupidest fucking things I've ever seen in my entire life. I don't talk about this theory because to me it's like the walten files theory equivalent of that tubby custard mechanically separated chicken post.

Most of the time I genuinely don't even consider it worthy of my time, because it's nonsense, but this is a very nicely worded ask, and I really don't mean to dedicate any of the vitriol I hold towards this theory to You, poor anonymous person, so I will deconstruct it. I will go through the theory point-by-point and deconstruct why I disagree with it.

First up, this:

Showbear is not a character in The Walten Files anymore. Showbear was fully retconned and is never going to appear in the series again. He was effectively just a cameo of ThunderingStatic's (one of Martin's friends) OC, but when The Walten Files blew up and people started assuming Showbear was Martin's character, Static decided to withdraw his character from the series and focus putting him in other projects.

Martin talked about this on Twitter forever ago, but I wouldn't be able to find that tweet now. But here's a bit from the interview he did with KnowYourMeme back in 2021 where he talks about it:

Now this:

This is just stupid to me? Like a complete logical incongruity? I barely even know how describe what is dumb about this because I can't even fathom how anyone draws this conclusion from this information. How is it strange for a man to say 'if my wife isn't home by the time she said she was going to be, let me know, in case something happened.'????? Why would Rosemary be out cheating on her husband with her fucking daughter with her??? If Rosemary was cheating on her husband why would her whole life collapse when he went missing? If Rosemary was cheating on her husband why would she show up at the restaurant every day after he disappeared asking if anyone had seen him and hoping to find him alive??? Why would she make paintings of herself and him together after he disappeared????? What the fuck are you talking about?

Ok now this:

Whatever. This is maybe the most coherent part of the theory, to me. I definitely agree that Sha evokes a 'wolf in sheep's clothing' sort of aesthetic, but I do remember Martin saying something in a Twitter Q&A at one point about how that wasn't actually intentional, and that Bon was the character he actually meant to seem unusually predatory. I looked for a while and couldn't find a screenshot of that, but I did find this one where he says the thing about Bon:

So whatever. take that with a grain of salt.

I don't even know what to say. here. Whatever. sure she was rolling in the hay

yeah Rosemary is asking if she's still beautiful because she cheated on her husband and not because she was chopped up and stuffed inside a big animatronic sheep. I think this is correct and is the True Deep Lore.of the walten files. I'm sure this doesn't have anything to do with the recurring motif of the double-meaning behind the word Beautiful either.

I don't know why it's weird that the lost lingering spirit of a mother would be calling out to her only living child. I Don't know why that needs additional explanation involving this batshit infidelity conspiracy theory.

Sha's chest is also ripped out

So is Banny's, honestly? Just a little less?

ok now this:

I guess I can't disprove this except that I think this is dumb. I think this is a really incredibly stupid logical leap to make. Y'know I really meant to go into this levelheadedly and very calmly go through every point and talk about why I think it's Decisively Disagreeable or whatever but I can't. I really can't. I just cannot keep my patience with this sort of thing.

You'd think if there was an infidelity aspect here it would've been lampshaded in some respect, at all, in the old /sophiewalten findjackwalten page text. Where it's literally Sophie talking to Jenny about what she remembers about her family.

Especially if the idea is that Sophie is meant to have been there. You'd think something like that would have come up here. Not 'she was nice and a good mom until my dad disappeared and her mental health started getting worse'

[taylorswiftdebut]

swifties’ beef with people who have supposedly wronged taylor is so funny to me cause it’s like on one end of the spectrum one dude stole her entire body of work and one dude emotionally manipulated her and their relationship when she was 19 and on the other end of the spectrum there’s her boyfriend of 6 years she parted amicably with and a girl who can’t even legally drink alcohol in the united states like it’s all so unserious be so fucking real

[idrisien]

"I love you. In every life, every shard, every universe."

Happy one year, Ezra and Hades ♡

[imogenkol]

Old Scars and New

word count: 3.3k warnings: blood, injury tending, disaster bisexual werewolf being cringe af tags: bandaging/stitching up wounds prompt

this is a slightly altered/updated version of my most popular piece of writing for this verse and thought I'd share it in my continued journey of rebuilding my relationship with my og works!

“Alright, who’s up first?” Nadya announced once everyone filed into the motel room.

Skye flashed a sly grin at the sight of Nadya putting her glasses on. “Ooh, are we gonna play doctor?”  

Jayde rolled her eyes and dumped her bag onto the floor, barely holding back a wince. The scent of her own blood invaded her lungs and she already felt bruises forming, but the aches and pains were far from uncommon occurrences. She dismissed any concern. “I’m fine.” 

Nadya ignored their comments and pointed at both of the siblings. “You two. Sit.”

“Are you going to tell me to roll over too?” Skye remarked. 

At the same time, Jayde reiterated grumpily “I said I’m fine.”

The human threw them a stern glare. Nadya may appear soft and approachable most of the time – even meek to those who underestimated her – but the wolves quickly discovered that she had a hidden talent for intimidation when she wanted to. Jayde and Skye simultaneously took their seats at the edge of one of the beds without further protest. 

Satisfied with their obedience, Nadya turned to Toby. “How are you feeling?” 

“Right as rain,” he replied.

She made a spin motion with her hand. “Twirl.” He held up his arms and turned in one slow circle, showing her that he was unscathed. “Nothing’s hurting?”

“Nope.”

She concluded her thorough scan with a pat on his shoulder. “Okay, you’re good.” 

Toby gave the sisters a childish smirk like he won a game and said “Ha.” Then sauntered over to a chair. 

Well, if the game went to whoever got hurt the least, then Jayde would never win. She almost scoffed at herself because the competitive side of her that came out around Toby hated the fact that she’d lose anything to him. She even made a mental note to be more careful the next time they encountered hunters just so that she could rub her success in his face. Maybe that was his real motive – to try a tactic that would work on a toddler simply to get the reckless blonde to take better care of herself. Jayde wouldn’t put it past him. 

Nadya addressed Skye next. “You got hit on the head pretty hard. How are you feeling?”

The young wolf widened her eyes. “I can see new colors now.”

Nadya laughed and fished out a small flashlight from her bag. “How about dizziness or nausea?”

Jayde watched on as Nadya carefully combed her fingers through Skye’s hair in search of any damage hidden in the light blonde waves. Skye kicked her feet like a little kid getting a check-up, but Jayde noted how her crooked smile evened out to something more… genuine. 

Skye was rarely ever anything but mischievous, as if life were just one big joke to her. Of course, there were precious few moments when her serious self would shine through, where there were no jokes to be made and she acted fairly mellow, much to her older sister’s relief. Jayde was shocked to see that happen more often when she interacted with Nadya. 

“I feel fine,” Skye answered, then flinched when Nadya touched the sore spot on her head. “Ow! But that hurts.” 

“Sorry.” Nadya winced apologetically. “I don’t see any blood, at least.” 

The tip of her finger tapped under Skye’s chin to get her to look up. It was then that Jayde noticed she had been chewing on the inside of her cheek. Skye went still as Nadya shined the light in her eyes. It felt like an eternity to Jayde. To see Nadya be so close to her sister, touching her in ways that Jayde longed for. The older wolf realized – with a hot flush to her cheeks – that she was jealous of Skye. That made her bite her cheek even harder as she forced herself to look down. 

Nadya stepped away, allowing Jayde to finally breathe normally again. “You don’t have a concussion, but I suggest you ice that for tonight.” 

“Sounds good, doc,” she replied with a wink. 

Just when Jayde thought she might get over the momentary lapse in her emotions, Nadya blushed. It was subtle enough that she might have been able to convince herself that she imagined it, but her thoughts took what she saw regardless of rationality and ran. 

The possibility had never occurred to her until that moment, but Jayde started to wonder if maybe Skye had feelings for the human, too. Jayde certainly couldn’t blame her if she did. It was Nadya, after all. This girl practically had Jayde wrapped around her finger the first day they met. The thing that ate at Jayde more than that were Nadya’s reactions to Skye. She wouldn’t have that hard of a time believing she also felt something for her. Her sister – in all of her annoying glory – was just as much of a catch. 

The concept felt nearly unbearable to consider, but Jayde knew that she would never stand in the way of her sister’s happiness or Nadya’s. Especially if it meant Nadya would get to be with someone far more worthy of her affections. Deep down, Jayde has been looking for a good, rock solid excuse to let her go. This possible outcome might be the easiest to accept. That didn’t mean it wasn’t exceptionally painful. 

Wallowing in a pit of her own creation caused Jayde to tune the rest of the world out until Nadya’s voice brought her back down to earth. 

“Crap, I grabbed the wrong kit,” she grumbled as she sifted through her bag.

Skye gasped dramatically. “Language.” 

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” Nadya said with an amused scoff and backed up towards the door. “I’m gonna go back to the car. I’ll pick up some ice for your head on the way back, too.” 

“Toby,” Jayde commanded with a purposeful glance. Despite being clear of immediate danger, she didn’t want anyone going anywhere by themselves. Not even to the parking lot. 

He nodded in understanding and got up. “Yeah, I’ll go with her.”  

Before they left, Nadya locked eyes with Jayde. For that single second, all of her worries were utterly nonexistent. “We’ll be back in a few minutes. Try not to get into any more trouble.” 

“No promises,” Skye replied. Jayde looked to see that the devious smirk had returned to her face. 

The siblings remained seated on the musty motel bed once Toby and Nadya disappeared. The comforter felt scratchy, but Jayde still balled her fists into the fabric and stared at the worn carpet underneath her blood splattered boots. Something metallic tickled the edge of her tongue and she sighed at the sting that shortly followed, releasing her flesh from her own vengeful teeth. 

“So, what crawled up your ass?” Skye asked to break the awkward silence. 

Jayde gave her a brief side-glance. “Nothing.” 

“Right.” Her words already dripped with sarcasm. “You’re just acting like you have to take Old Yeller out back for no reason.” 

Jayde felt a brief spark boil in her chest, but it died out as quickly as it came. She didn’t have the will to be angry or defensive. She only sighed again and forced her question out. “Do you like her?”

There was no hesitation in Skye’s answer. “Yeah, of course I like her.”

“No, I mean… Do you like her?"

Confusion twisted the younger wolf’s features as she blinked at Jayde for several moments. Jayde wordlessly begged not to make her spell it out. The question alone was already mortifying enough. As soon as her meaning fully sank in, Skye’s expression promptly turned incredulous. 

“Forget it,” Jayde said curtly.

But Skye already jumped on it. “No, you know what? I do like her. I really, really like her. Yeah, I want her to have my babies.” 

Jayde had to fight the urge to growl. “It was a genuine question, Skye.” 

“And you’re a genuine idiot,” she fired back with no remorse. “I don’t want your girlfriend, Jayde.” 

“She’s not my girlfriend.” 

“She could be.”

“She shouldn’t.” 

Skye raised an eyebrow. “That’s not very progressive of you. You’re sounding like Miranda with that old world bullshit. Who cares if Nadya is a human? Just be careful not to break or bite her. That simple.” 

Jayde shook her head. “It’s not that…” 

The slow nod she saw out of the corner of her eye turned into a shrug as Skye leaned into her. “What if you’re wrong about yourself?” she whispered like a kid telling a secret. 

They fell back into another prolonged silence as Jayde rocked back and forth anxiously. She wasn’t wrong about herself, but Jayde somehow still had the smallest bit of hope that she could become someone Nadya deserves. That if she tried to be better, she wouldn’t fight this so hard or put herself through all of this pain. She had it in her. Somewhere. Buried underneath dirt and dust. The best version would peek through the cracks of everything broken about her whenever that girl was near. Jayde just had to figure out a way to widen the fractures and reach through. 

But she worried she would break herself even more by doing that. 

After a minute, her lungs deflated once more in utter hopelessness. “I am an idiot.” 

Familiar footsteps approached the room and Skye nudged her older sister with her elbow. “Chin up, sport.” 

Jayde managed to give her a grateful look just as the others returned. Nadya held a small bag of ice in one hand and a different first aid kit in the other. She went to Skye first and handed her the ice for her head. 

Guilt immediately flooded Jayde’s system for feeling so jealous. Nadya put in so much effort to take care of them all and Jayde had been worried that she wanted her sister over her. She needed to get over herself. 

“Okay, you’re good to go. Just take it easy,” Nadya ordered. 

Skye enthusiastically jumped to her feet while balancing the ice pack on top of her head. “Great, I’m gonna go get tacos across the street.” 

“Don’t go alone,” Jayde called as she skipped towards the door.

She waved dismissively. “Yeah, yeah, buddy system.” 

“You guys want anything?” Toby asked before he trailed after her.

“Just get me whatever you get,” Jayde said.

“Okay. Nadya?”

Nadya sounded slightly distracted as she prepared the kit. “Uh, what kinds are there?” 

“Asada, pollo, carnitas.” When she took too long to ponder the options, he translated in a patronizing tone “Beef, chicken, pork.” 

She looked up and fixed him with an exasperated stare. “I know what they mean, I was just thinking.” 

Toby chuckled. “Any day now.” 

“Get me chicken.” 

He gave a casual thumbs up. “You got it.” 

The motel room grew quiet again once it became only the two young women. The wolf took time to let the human’s presence calm the restless being within. She focused on how her air of crisp autumn spices encompassed her senses, even over the scents of the others. What fascinated Jayde was how her existence always broke through the most powerful things. Werewolves had an incredibly distinct and potent scent, so being around her pack should have masked the humanness of Nadya’s scent. But it didn’t. In fact, Jayde often sensed her before she sensed anything or anyone else. It was always her first. 

“Your turn?” Nadya suggested softly, immediately drawing Jayde’s full attention. 

Up to that point, she had completely forgotten about her injuries. “Oh, right.” 

Nadya came directly to her, standing just inches away. Jayde stared up at her and waited, totally transfixed. “Let’s get a look at that arm.” 

Jayde realized she needed to remove her jacket. She snapped herself out of her trance and carefully slipped out of it, grimacing as the fabric tugged at the graze on her bicep. Blood had mostly soaked into the jacket itself, but streaks of crimson still smeared across her skin and reached as low as her wrist.

Nadya bent down and adjusted her glasses to get a better look, but that furrow in her brow looked like it took too much effort. “Do you think we could move to the bathroom? The lighting sucks out here and I gotta get you cleaned up.” 

“Yeah.” 

Nadya followed closely behind as they entered the bathroom, but lingered over Jayde’s shoulder after turning the light on. “Hey, did you take a hit to the back?” 

Jayde craned her neck to see why she looked so concerned, but couldn’t see much of anything. The strain of twisting only made her injured shoulder spike with pain. “Um, I’m not sure. Maybe? I remember getting punched or something.” 

“There’s blood, Jay,” Nadya informed her, still inspecting the wound. “Take this off.” 

Jayde felt her entire body flare with intense heat as Nadya tugged at her shirt. She hesitated for a few beats to let the embarrassment pass. It wasn’t like Nadya hadn't seen her without a shirt on before. Hell, she’s seen her naked. She’s seen her turn into a goddamn werewolf, for fuck’s sake. Jayde wanted to curse at herself for being so stupid. 

She struggled to get out of the shirt on her own. It was enough that her shoulder felt as sore as it did, but now that she had been made aware of it, the wound on Jayde’s back stung like a bitch. As much as she wanted to hide her pain, she wasn’t able to stop herself from flinching when she tried to work one of her arms out of the ruined clothing. 

“Here, let me –” Nadya reached to help, but then her pulse spiked in the wolf’s ears like a drum had been struck and she stopped short. “Can I..?”

“Sure, yeah,” Jayde stammered and braced herself as the human stepped into her space. 

Nadya’s hands carefully gripped the bottom of the bloodied shirt and slowly pushed it up her torso. Jayde could tell that she tried not to, but there were still a couple of times where her fingers brushed up against bare skin. Jayde clenched her jaw tightly. Just those small, brief touches caused intense tingling to spread outwards from the places of contact. She shut her eyes and held her breath as her wolf fought to rise to the surface. A shiver raced along Jayde’s spine as she quickly dampened it. After a tense half-second, she felt the restless animal reluctantly retreat. 

Despite nearly losing control, Jayde didn’t feel afraid. Maybe because she knew Nadya wasn’t in any danger. The wolf only wanted a glimpse of her, but the last thing Jayde wanted was to cause any potential fear. She certainly didn’t want to think up some shitty excuse to explain why her eyes started to glow. 

The two of them successfully got the shirt over Jayde’s head with minimal pain and discarded it on the floor. Meeting Nadya’s gaze after that felt far braver than facing any hunter. She had this look in her warm brown eyes that Jayde couldn’t quite decipher. However, the physical effect in Nadya’s body was more obvious. Being so close, Jayde sensed it all. 

An erratic heartbeat. A clipped breath caught in her throat. A blooming scent that tempted Jayde nearer. 

Those were not things she noticed in Nadya with anyone else, Jayde realized. 

“I’m going to, uh…” Nadya motioned awkwardly, finally just shuffling behind her again. 

Jayde cleared her throat to banish her own nerves and brushed her tangled hair over her shoulder. “How’s it looking back there?” 

“This is pretty deep,” she murmured and began to clean it. “You really didn’t feel this?”

Jayde tensed at the incredibly cold sensation of a disinfectant wipe against her hot skin, but she still gave a half shrug. “I remember being hit, but that’s all.” 

“Well, you got lucky. It could have punctured your lung.”

Jayde set her hands on the edge of the sink and watched Nadya’s reflection carefully through the mirror. “Yeah, I feel lucky.” 

“That better not be sarcasm. Not when I’m looking at all these scars.” Nadya scolded as she got the stitches ready. “It looks like you should be dead ten times over.” 

“It’s because I should be.” 

They briefly shared a look. Nadya’s expression remained unreadable. Not that Jayde had the time to properly study it before she went back to work. 

She didn’t say anything while she made a few sutures — being too focused on her task of mending a werewolf — but then Jayde saw her brown eyes peek over her shoulder again. “I’m really glad you aren’t, by the way.” 

Jayde exhaled an almost whispered response. “Me too.”  

A bandage was carefully placed over the newly stitched wound, but Nadya lingered behind her. Jayde wondered if maybe she had spotted another wound that hadn’t quite traveled through her nerves and up to her brain yet, but then felt an incredibly delicate sensation tickle her lower back. It took a moment for her to realize that it was the tip of Nadya’s finger trailing over what had to be one of her scars. Jayde froze in place, not having a single clue how to react. 

“How many are there?” Nadya’s voice sounded distant. 

Jayde gripped the edges of the sink so that she wouldn’t fall over as the girl traced another sensitive mark. She was afraid that the slightest movement would cause her to stop. “I’ve never counted.” 

A soft hum echoed in the bathroom. “I guess you’ve got a couple more now. Which reminds me…” Nadya pulled her hand away, but before disappointment twisted an invisible knife in the werewolf’s chest, her palm rested on her hip and turned her around. 

The human’s sudden willingness to touch her in ways that could be considered intimate left Jayde’s mind in a utter stupor, stirring her inner self once more. She didn’t know what to make of it. Or what to do. She knew what she wanted to do, though that remained a line Jayde felt she shouldn’t cross. 

Nadya went to work on the laceration that cut through her upper arm and Jayde found herself thoroughly fascinated with the process. The human’s eyes were so focused, making sure each and every stitch was up to her standard. The way her brows knitted in concentration — the thin frame of her glasses resting on the bridge of her nose — replaced Jayde’s heart with a pair of fluttering wings. She could stare at her for hours. 

Nadya finally glanced up while she wrapped her arm. This time, her blush was entirely noticeable. “What?” 

The question made Jayde realize she had been smiling. She quickly looked away, though she couldn’t fully wipe the expression from her face. “Nothing.” 

“Okay,” Nadya said slowly, confused amusement written on her face. “Well, I’m all done.” 

Jayde nodded as she cleaned the mess up. As soon as the kit was packed, Nadya gave the wolf an unsure look and turned to leave the bathroom. On impulse, Jayde caught her wrist to stop her. A small gasp escaped Nadya’s lips at the unexpected touch, but she still waited expectantly. 

“Thank you.” Jayde caressed the smooth curve of her wrist with her thumb. For the first time, she didn’t try to hide it. She wanted Nadya to feel her gratitude. “For taking care of us.” 

Nadya’s features softened into an absolutely stunning smile. “I like taking care of you.” 

It took everything Jayde had not to pull her in. She yearned to feel Nadya against her. Longed to brush their lips together. To hold her close and swallow every breath. Feel all the ways she could get her heart to race. Instead, Jayde’s fingers went slack and Nadya slipped out of her grasp, leaving her alone in the bathroom with the ghost of her contact still prickling across the surface of her skin.

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[moonchild-in-blue]

I'm gonna be meta for a little bit, but huge shout out to George Lever (Sleep Token's previous producer).

Like, don't get me wrong, I love Carl Bown (he's worked with soo many of my favourite bands and killed it), and I love that Vessel himself got involved in the producing process of TMBTE. The album is amazing, everything sounds extremely clean and professional, and very, very concise.

But George Lever? That guy has a way with music that just... It's very innate. I think One was self-produced (although I'm not entirely sure), but everything else apart from TMBTE was produced by him - and you can tell.

There's this very raw and organic feeling to his work that I think it's quite rare to find nowadays. Especially the drums - I really wish he could've been the one mixing it for the last album because man, he just gets it.

When I first listened to Eden, I remember thinking "man, this drummer is insane". But then I went all the way back to One and slowly made my way to TPWBYT and ket me tell you, Jaws' drum line left me flabbergasted. I know that George and ii have been friends/working together for quite a while prior to ST, so maybe that's one reason why. But they just work so well together, everything sounds so clear and crisp, it feels almost impossible.

This is not to discredit the amazing, fenomenal work done on TMBTE - there's a reason why it's my favourite album and why it gained the traction it did - nor to downplay ii's insane skills (as if one could ever do that, he's just that good). But George's work with ST is just so, so brilliant, and I really needed to put it out there.

It's been a while since I've checked in on him, but it seems he's a bit inactive nowadays? Idk. Whatever the reason why he's no longer working with them, or why he's a bit mia (or was for a while), I wish him all the best, and I'm just so thankful for all his hard work.