#indifferent to reva

[kittenfangirl20]

I don’t hate Reva, in fact I am rather indifferent to her, but I can assure you that if you do what antianakin want that will only make so pretty much no one will watch the show since Reva was such a controversial character. They say that they don’t want Anakin mentioned or to appear in the show, but I bet they wouldn’t have a problem with every character patting Reva on the back and telling her that she is right to hate Anakin even though in Phantom Menace it is said that hate will lead to suffering. I bet they also wouldn’t mind if there was a scene where Reva proudly declares she never killed a child and then have a flashback where Reva hesitates in killing a child and Vader just magically jumps in and kills the child while we have an extreme close up of Reva sobbing uncomfortably while Vader kills the child even though this wouldn’t make any sense. Reva was a person who was fine with kidnapping Leia in order to draw out Obi-Wan and was very close to killing Luke, so she definitely killed children, yet Anakin Haters love her even though we are constantly told that they hate him because he killed the younglings at the Jedi Temple. In fact I think it would have made more sense if Obi-Wan had been forced to kill Reva in order to protect Luke.

[selchwife]

i feel like a big problem i keep running into is that the rake and composer survived expyfication very well and kept their chemistry intact but i still am like desperately trying to make the revcaius pieces fit beyond "they bone crazy." bc revas is so emotionally guarded and honestly kind of a dick

[ramonag-if]

Soo I'm playing my mc Reva as someone who was indifferent and stoic in Salt Bay but starts to show more of their emotions after making connections with family and companions.

I can't help but wonder what Dena would think seeing the stoic indifferent MC from salt bay smiling laughing and being playful with Irus, Elora, Oren after they meet the MC again at the Southern Islands.

Dena has a lot of feelings about the MC - most of those feelings are kept to themselves, hidden from the MC. Dena is sad that they couldn't be the one to make the MC smile or laugh or that they weren't able to get back to the MC in time to take them away from Salt Bay (if you chose to sneak out to meet Dena in the prologue, Dena will ask the MC if they want to travel - and this is something Dena regrets a lot). It's mostly a mix of sadness, regret and a bit of jealousy that they weren't there for the MC as a friend opposed to the main gang.

[hegodamask]

Your thoughts each on: the sequel trilogy, mandalorian, book of bobba fett and kenobi shows?

I’ll keep it brief because I’m tired but:

Sequel Trilogy: Enjoyed TFA, loved TLJ, hated TROS. The fandom and just overall negativity makes me feel indifferent to it now. I couldn’t care less if the era and it’s characters are revisited.

The Mandalorian: A great start to live action Star Wars TV, but I’m getting tired of the “cameos” and how predictable it can be sometimes. Now we have other SW shows, I don’t get as excited about it as I used to. But I’m always happy to see that weird baby Grogu.

TBOBF: Can you believe that came out this year? It feels like a million years ago and I can barely remember what happened in it. Loved the stuff with the Tuskens, but hate how it basically became Mando season 2.5 in the end. This ties into my thoughts on Mando, but I’m really not feeling Favreau and Filoni’s MCU-ified version of Star Wars. They’re pumping out all these shows that are supposed to be interconnected and I just don’t care anymore.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Enjoyable but could’ve been so much better. Should’ve been a feature film instead of a series. Hate how cheap it looked . That said, Leia being the reason Obi-Wan leaves Tatooine was great and I loved their dynamic so much. Wish they’d focused more on Reva and just cut out the other Inquisitors, they were unnecessary (and looked awful).

[hxdrostorm]

@masterofthehighgroud​ has sent: Questions Often Left Unanswered: Mun Edition 1 | 2 | 6 | 12

Questions Often Left Unanswered: Mun Edition [Accepting]

1. Are there any characters in your fandom or faceclaims you refuse to RP with? Who and why?

// My rules has a section showing the fandoms/communities I don’t want to interact or rp with! Here’s a reminder to it:

MLP, Homestuck, Undertale, Fnaf, League of Legends (Arcane won’t get a pass), Genshin Impact, Fnf, Disney and MCU (I’m debating on whether or not, I’ll give the comics a pass tho...)

Star wars stuff in specific.  I’m intimidated and iffy about Legends characters, simply because I’m still not 100% knowledgeable about it (I’m learning more and more about it). Kotor/jedi fallen order/any of the SW games... I’m also not well versed in them, so I’ll also be hesitant to interact with them. With all of these things said, here are my straight ‘no’s. Unless I’m well acquaintanced with the mun behind the muse, I’ll not write with any of the sequels era characters (As stated in my muses directory. Although I’ve watched the trilogy, I’m not entirely familiar with it, which contributes to my overall lack of interest in interacting with it). Then there are the Starcruiser hotel, and the theme park attractions which are at the very bottom of everything thus getting the biggest no (I don’t think I have to talk about how the vibes between those things, don’t fall in line with anything else within the SW universe, right? Nah man, y’all can keep and try to excuse the +6k dollar LARP mess [which I heard that Disney is looking to double the prices so Y I K E S])

And as I’m writing this: I also won’t RP with Andor muses, until the serie is over.

2. Are there any plot tropes you are sick of/refuse to RP? If so, what are they and why?

// I’m not a fan of those fix-it AUs. No matter what it may be about. ‘No order 66 palpie chokes on a croissant & the galaxy is all fine & dandy uwu AU’, ‘clones are just one big family & jango is their dad uwu AU’. I understand the desire for those types of plots for fanarts and fanfics, but when it comes RP? Killing off the tragedy in SW is the equivalent of, burning down SW’s very essence. Also I’ve noticed that with these plots, they always end up watering down so many things about SW. The name of the series is literally Star wars, the war IS meant to be ugly, I don’t think anyone should sugarcoat that.

6. Is there a character that the rest of your fandom adores that you just don’t like/are indifferent to? Who is the character and why?

// I think that the Kenobi series hype is long dead by now, SO I can finally say this, without sb coming out of the woodworks to crucify me for it. Reva was mediocre at best (the actress put on her best, it is just that the script she was handed to was bad. The odds were against her.). She most certainly wasn’t the worst thing that came out of the show, see young Leia (wtf did they do to thIS KID?) and Tala (who? I literally forgot about her 5 secs after her death).

I just wished that Lucas arts hadn’t wasted their time with fan-baiting, hate-baiting its audience, all while using Ingram as a meat-shield for every single criticism towards the show. And instead taken their time to properly iron out this character. BC as she currently stands? It’s bad... That pitiful attempt at a redemption? Yeah, it could use some MUCH needed work, instead of just slapping it on her then calling it a day. But I’ll take what we got, over whatever the drafted one had in it (Cody’s legacy is safe... For now...).

12. What’s your biggest pet peeve when it comes to the fandom you RP in?

// What’s up with all the weird anons me and many of my mutuals have been getting? I’ve never had to deal with anything like it, in all of my RPing years. What’s up with people not knowing how to use the block function, and blacklisting feature?

I’ve received multiple anons, whining about the fact I write cloneshipping. Or even having meltdowns over some of my HCs. I want to believe this is the result of how the search function on tumblr now operates, so it searches with anything that contains the searched words, instead of the tags. So, I’m chalking it up to being just strangers, finding my blog unaware of what this blog is about. But at the same time, there is a part of me that thinks I’ve received hate from actual RPers over that. BC god forbid, blocking sb and moving on with their day, is just too simple.

There is never a bad reason to not block someone. Even if it may sound silly in your mind, just block/filter out whatever is bugging you. It’s a whole lot better than hate-reading, or exposing yourself to shit you know that causes you discomfort.

[marcelosbloggingproject]

Reflective essay

While reading the book; “My year of rest and relaxation” by Otessa Moshfeg for my blogging project, I found myself overwhelmed about the main character’s actions and about how everything was being developed in the hostile setting presented in the plot. The main points of view represented by the protagonist of this novel as well as the environments where all these actions take place caused me to believe that the protagonist was an awful human being.

The protagonist of the book is unnamed throughout the novel. She is described as a young, beautiful, wealthy woman. With this absolutely privileged life in front of her, she was very pathetic and consumed by an overwhelming sense of emptiness. She decided that she will consume several prescription drugs to achieve a goal of sleeping for an entire year, where she believes that maybe if she could just sleep for a year, somehow her life will reset, and then she can start everything all over again. All her actions were dictated by the urge to escape the pain and numbness. She is characterized by irrational, self-destructive behavior and deep indifference to the world around her. This detachment grows stronger the more she isolates, refusing to engage meaningfully with others, even her only friend, Reva, which she would act so rude towards her.

The year is around the early 2000s; the city of New York forms a background against which the main character falls apart mentally and emotionally. The city is often depicted, thrashing and full of energy, though it seems to be cold and caring less, just like the mental state of the main character. She floats through a hostile environment that includes her desolated and dark apartment where much of the novel's action takes place, and the offices of her therapist. The structure of the novel is so fragile and disjointed that it presents a sense of detachment from life, which disorients the reader, much like the protagonist herself.

Overall, "My Year of Rest and Relaxation" is a very deep exploration and searching for meaning in a world most times hostile. The desolation is amplified through the setting of this novel and its protagonist's actions as well as the lengths one might go to try to get away from one’s own mind.

[theasexuwhalestuff]

Thoughts while watching Part III of the Kenobi Series

Looking at the title card for the umpteenth time and wondering why tf they couldn't just have gone with Kenobi. Most people already call it that instead of his full name. Lesser chance for confusion, and sounds way better. Similar ring to Andor.

Was looking forward to seeing Obi-Wan resume his panic/anxiety attack and completely lose his shit. But I guess him calling out to his master for the millionth time also works.

But seriously, Qui-Gon you bitch where are you when your son needs you answer him FFS.

I really have to commend Ewan for his portrayal of Obi-Wan during this stage of his life. I know he's mentioned that he's had to relearn Obi-Wan's accent, and I can hear hints of his Scottish accent coming through, but something else still sounded off. It took me a while to figure out the way his whole inflection and tone had changed. This was a conscious choice on Ewan's part, since the Obi-Wan he's playing now is very different to the one he's played before. He's portraying a broken, dejected man, and it's reflected in the way he speaks and interacts with the world around him. He doesn't help the Jedi who sought him out, and is unwilling to help Bail. His attitude towards Leia borders on indifferent and in this episode he even snaps at her, saying not everyone is good. I mean sure she can be annoying and something of a know-it-all, but I don't think I could ever have imagined Obi-Wan snapping at a child during the prequel era. Gone are his easygoing smile, the somewhat dramatic cadence of his voice, and the sarcastic remarks. Goes to show just how much research and care has been put into the state the character is in at this point in time. A person's experience is truly what shapes them, and here we're fortunate enough to get a glimpse of who this man could be in much different circumstances, and just how much he can bend before he breaks.

Mapuzo is a nice planet. I like the aesthetic.

Leia's actress, Vivien Lyra Blair was likely only 8 years old during filming, and it doesn't help that she easily looks like she could be 6 at the youngest. Adorable and very talented though. I've seen some of her other work.

Leia stepping up to the role of caretaker, because really, this man needs some serious help.

Damn, Order 66 rlly did a number on the great Negotiator, huh? Man can barely form words.

Why tf is this dumbass wandering around planet-to-planet in his old Jedi robes and the most Jedi-looking outfit in existence. Couldn't have picked out a different colour?? Different style and cut of clothes?? You're public enemy number one, man. Common sense be flying out the airlock.

That slip-up in front of the troopers gave me second-hand embarassment.

Ok, nice save. Negotiator back in his element, kinda.

Aw, Obi saying he wishes he could say he was Leia's father, and being soft to her 😭

Remembering his parents and his baby brother goddamnit.

But why tf are they talking so freely at the back of that space truck.

Ok, I love that unlike in the prequels, The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett, the fight scenes here are a lot slower since Obi-Wan is woefully out of practice, but is still kicking ass cuz well, Stormtroopers.

Leia running to Obi-Wan exactly the same way Grogu ran to his papa after being snatched by those bandits in Season 2 😭😭😭

Leia looking distraught and hugging Lola, so Obi-Wan goes to comfort her 😭❤

Quinlan Vos lives??? Also, Obi-Wan's tiny smile at finding out his little shit of a friend is still alive.

Reva starting to piss me off ngl.

Vader suddenly appearing with his saber scared the shit outta me.

Man rlly just took out his lightsaber only to immediately bolt outta there lmao.

Ok but when did lightsabers get so thick.

Im sorry but why are you walking away from Vader?? RUN my dude.

Yeah, this is why I loved The Mandalorian so much. Sick of Jedi and Sith devilry, and watching the SAME two men trade lightsaber blows, fucking boring. There's more to Star Wars than the fucking Jedi. Pls no more Jedi in future Mando seasons, Favloni 🤲

No rlly, how is he gonna come back alive after this? He's barely hanging onto life.

Yeah man, he's right. Really shoulda skewered this asshole when he choked his pregnant wife nearly to death. A child-killer not to mention.

I can already hear the dudebros lamenting the quality of the last epic duel lmfao.

WTF ANAKIN, DON'T BARBECUE YOUR DAD-BROTHER.

Letting Leia go alone was a stupid ass decision, but Tala and NED-B to Obi-Wan's rescue!

Run, Leia, run.

[merrysithmas]

You know there seems to be a lot of fighting within the fandom about the Jedi Order and weather or not they were flawed. It seems people go with one of two extremes.

The Jedi were THE good guys who never did anything wrong and if you criticize them your attacking the real world religions GL pulled from so yours bigot.

Or the were their the worst, weren’t any better than the Sith and, were a people who “needed” to be wiped out without any redeeming qualities.

As a SW newbie it’s very intense and a lot to take in. It gets feather confusing. Not to mention difficult to discern which claims have legitimate backing.

I feel like I can trust you not to be aggressive as well a more full picture person. With a trustworthy opinion. So I was wondering what are your opinions on the Jedi? Were they flawed? Why or why not? And how did those any flaws affect them especially in relations to training Anakin?

(That seems to be the biases for most arguments I’ve seen honestly. That either it’s all Anakin’s fault and he was ungrateful and this didn’t deserve to be a Jedi. Or the Jedi are his villain origin story) 

Aw anon! Thank for your good faith and please also do not let anyone's pushy fandom opinion get to you. You are 100% entitled to your thoughts on any fandom topic and those that try to monopolize the stage in fandom and cruelly cut down others are truly not worth attention or energy.

Everyone is allowed to think what they want on any topic (including hardline positions such as the "The Jedi were the Ultimate Good", or "The Jedi were useless and should end") - however the second anyone who thinks those things crosses the boundary of demanding others also follow those opinions or be branded "bad" "misinterpreting media" etc it's just nonsense. Don't feel intimiated by anyone to change your opinion.

Everyone comes at media from a different place, different background etc. Which means everyone has a unique and important perspective on its lessons - none of which are more true than another.

I feel like people take those hardline opinions in SW, prohibiting any other, because they look at SW through a single lens (like say, as an allegory for politics Freedom vs Fascism). That is valid, but Star Wars can be see as much more than a political story, or a political story and a spiritual story simultaneously if one chooses.

It can also be seen as an exploration of our inner lives- our duality. It can be seen as a story of Balance. It can be seen as a story which focus on themes such as those of Fatherhood, masculinity & femininity, passivity & aggression. Or as a story of opposed Good vs Evil - but what makes up good and what makes up evil? Everyone will have different versions of an answer for that. You can hold all these thoughts of SW together at once as well!

For instance, of course Star Wars has a obvious political side: Freedon vs Fascism. As an audience we nearly always side with the sympathetic rebels... no one wants the Empire to win in reality.

But we are allowed to be interested in the characters of the Empire... what led them there, what are their cruelest intentions? Are some brainwashed? Were some strong armed? What parts of them have humanity? None? Most? What about characters like Finn who were kidnapped and conscripted? Ventress who turned her back on Dooku? Reva who murdered families to ultimately avenge her family? Kylo Ren who was manipulated? Galen Erso who became an Imperial to save others, likely while killing many more during service? Han Solo who became as an Imperial conscripted soldier, who was a scoundrel and thief but was imperative to Luke's success? Vader who was a Sith but ultimately saved the Galaxy? Maul who realized the cruelty of the Sith? etc We are allowed to empathize, cheer on, and identity with all of them because they represent pieces of us, too.

The same can be said for the rebels & "good guys". Cassian Andor who used violence for good? Jyn Erso who was indifferent until it became personal? Rey who ran away from responsility and truth? Anakin Skywalker who used his unmatched power to kill thousands for the Republic and was cheered on as a hero of freedom? Saw Gerrera who was an insurrectionist but did what many thought "needed to be done"? Boba Fett who eventually sought to protect the people of Tatooine under a criminal empire? Nightsister Merrin who tried to kill Cal Kestis only to eventually see him as an ally? etc.

Thinking about things like these helps us to understand the world around us, and helps us better understand the human condition.

Star Wars is also a spiritual story. As a buddhist witch myself I do not see it as a story of diametrically opposed "Good vs Evil" but a story about Balance. People are free to see it as hardline good and evil, but in my view of the world those two things don't ever exist in a vaccuum.

The energies of dark and light coexist in all of us, giving us continual hope and trials. I even feel labeling them as "dark and light" is a misnomer. It is more passivity and aggression. Both of which can be used for good and bad intentioned acts.

The way I see it the Sith and Jedi, in their dogma, missed this with their constant opposition and fighting. The Force is one - there is no dark or light, only the whole unified Force. To me, it is the individual that chooses the intent of their actions: we can use passion to inspire peace, violence for protection, attachment for inspiration & as an anchoring good. Or we can use all those things for bad.

Our guiding light for well-intention is our principles of tolerance, acceptance, compassion, and understanding. The Jedi espouse these views and often act on them - their code is certainly a pinnacle of philosophy which can inspire well-intentioned deeds- however they are imperfect, like us all!

Yoda once said fear is the Path to the Dark. The way I see it, the Order unintentionally taught fear of emotions which had no alignment- emotions are inherently neutral. Yoda realized this in RotS. Simply having certain emotions don't make someone "closer to the dark side"... it is how we handle them that does that. By fearing passion, attachment, anger, we do not learn how to face and embrace them. By seeking always to "control" them and not act on them, express them, embody them, free them, alchemize them, we miss out on what they have to teach us. And that need for control over them gives them power over us and our inexperience.

In The Jedi Path, a jedi textbook, we learn of the extremism of the early Jedi which to me, when taken to certain extents - was distasteful! I am a Jedi fan and I disliked it.

Though they were an Institution which strived for good, the early Jedi were warsome, conformist, and frighteningly strict with no room for natural evolutionary growth through the ages. It's akin to say... people who insist the US Constitution written 300 years ago must be abided by at all costs, when many feel it should be a living document open to growth and change. Or like the language or French which prohibits official changes in its structure to include slang from different languages etc. It doesn't grow or change, and sometimes this weakens institutions - not strengthens them.

The Sith on the other hand embraced these emotions without a code of ethics - they feared a Code because of what they saw as the suffocation of the Jedi rules and regulations. Unfortunately this caused them to go hog wild in the other direction, leading to chaos. They used these emotiona (and the power that came with them) to crush, kill, dominate, and destroy. Their perverse beliefs were to weed out the weak in society and obtain a "rightful" position of authority. Truly evil! However if we look at this as a microcosm of our inner duality, it makes sense. We often seek to weed out or kill what we see as weak in ourselves - for good or bad.

In the Book of Sith, we see the Sith develop many incredible skills the Jedi lack because of their unwillingness to change. Sith alchemy, although used for evil by the Sith - can easily be drawn as a comparison for things like IVF, medicine, science, cloning, vaccines etc. Things that "go against nature" (the Jedi on the other hand insisted "nature" was the final say of the Force on one's reality).

In fact, Darth Plagueis' writings on the midichlorians and the "ability to manipulate life" and break it down to its bare essentials VERY MUCH screamed modern science to me. It screamed self-determinism and rising above our "natural"-born state. It screamed a "challenge" to the will of "God" (The Force). Dr Frankenstein stuff. The Sith argued nature was also a prison - one that our minds & intellect can propel us beyond. I believe in Christian mythos this would be like the Apple eaten in the Garden of Eden. Sure, it opened the couple to the evils of the world, but also gave them free will and intellect.

Simple things like glasses, medicine, X rays, cars, etc. The Sith are rebuking acceptance of "nature" as a lack of ingenuity and an insult to the free will and mind - a stagnation. They despise the Jedi for their inertia. Interesting stuff!

Unfortunately, again, the Order of the Sith and its leaders (such as Plagueis) uses this knowledge for selfish reasons. Hurts others to obtain it.

The Sith mantra remains somewhat inspirational: Peace is a lie; there is only passion, Through passion I gain strength, Through strength I gain power, Through power I gain victory, Through victory my chains are broken, The Force will set me free.

In a way, they are correct! Where does peace come from but from our passion to obtain it? If we weren't so intent on our will to meditate, relax, self care... we wouldn't achieve it. Through this passion and the benefits we reap from it we can gain strength of character. Through that, personal power of will. And through that, freedom from our egos or circumstances.

You'll see the Sith and Jedi codes are literally complimentary- there is a reason for this! It is because the Force is not split into good and evil... people did that. Institutions did that. Luke, in TLJ, tries to teach this to Rey in his first lesson on Ahch-to. That is a very "Good vs Evil" Christian-influenced morality which I don't personally find applicable to the concept of the Force.

In my opinion the Jedi Way is Goodness, but the Jedi Order is an Institution run by people - who no matter how much they profess to be good, are always corruptible. We see this example many times in canon from Jedi. The jedi Path is goodness. However the Order and its rules often equate themselves to the Path, which is their folly.

Conversely, the Way of the Sith is self-realization, but the Sith Order is an Instituion run by people - who no matter how much they profess to be seeking freedom, are often unstable in their confusion and pain. This corrupts their actions to violence and evil. However, as they are only people... it means they are capable of redemption. We see examples of this as well in Maul and Vader.

The Jedi Order did not "deserve" to be obliterated by any means. But I think focusing on "deserve" is a little misguided. In the SW mythos, by creating the Chosen One the Force presented a litmus test to all Institutions in the Galaxy - the Sith, the Jedi, the Senate, the individuals involved, the people of the Galaxy at large. How they reacted to and treated the McGuffin of Anakin was essentially cementing their fate in stone. Like the Prince in Beauty and the Beast turning away the Old Woman at the castle and being condemned by it.

The Jedi neglected his special needs, the Sith manipulated him, the Senate used him as a weapon for war victory, Padme married him despite knowing he was grieving his mother and wanted to be a Jedi, Obi-wan often fumbled with him because of his own inability to self-analyze, the peoples of the galaxy murdered his mother, enslaved him.

In the eyes of the Force, the galaxy failed its child.

That is not to the say the Jedi were not overwhelmingly good intentioned, they were! Some in the Senate also desperately wanted peace. Padme was struggling with her own lack of childhood and nervous breakdown. Obi-wan had been derailed his entire life by Qui-gon's death. Anakin was continually abused and used for his abilities in every direction. The tragedy of Star Wars is: They were all good, but they failed regardless.

All those institutions were built on some kind of instability which pervaded as tiny cracks to their ethics. Letting evil seep in (how Sidious slithered through). They were all going to fall eventually, it was just a matter of when and how.

Which I think leads to the important number one lesson of Star Wars (to me) whether you look at it as Good vs Evil, a political story, a tale of inner Balance, a metaphor for the soul, a philosophical exercise on duality, or a spiritual story... the main lesson is:

Hope.

That you can be good and fail. And start over.

You can be bad and succeed in your badness - realize it is wrong, and start over.

We can see our passion as power and be free.

We can see our passion as an enemy and have peace.

It depends on inner wisdom, love, and support. It depends on sometimes reaching out in compassion, and other times turning our backs. It depends on our will to fight, and other times our wisdom not to. It depends on killing the past and other times accepting it and letting it guide us.

It depends on many things but most of all, empoweringly, It depends on what we want.

And as for your question about how I feel Anakin was influenced by the Jedi and whose "fault" his fall was - in my opinion, as per textual on-screen canon, it was everyone's. The Jedi, the Sith, the Senate, Padme, Obi-wan, many many others, and of course also Anakin himself.

However... it is those very same people and systems, The Jedi, the Sith, the Rebellion, Padme (Luke), Obi-wan, many others, and of course Anakin himself... which also redeemed him. And saved the galaxy.

Intention. Choice.

Duality.

😉

[sullustangin]

Worldbuilding Wednesday: “The Force” *Supposedly*

Spoilers ahoy for a character in Obi-Wan: Haja Estree.   This is a brief look at the character, then discussion about building a Force skeptical character in fic.

In Episode 2 of Obi-Wan Kenobi, we meet Haja Estree.  He pretends to be a Jedi as a means of smuggling people off Daiyu... and taking all their money.

Haja Estree made me so happy to see because a) there are grifters like that in every culture that prey upon believers; b) it substantiates some skepticism and irreverence toward Jedi; people like Han Solo have seen this guy in some form, in their life.

Prior to Order 66, there were probably a lot more people like Haja Estree in various backwaters and underworlds in the galaxy, pulling the same stunt.  We see this in SWTOR itself, somewhat, with Guss Tuno -- who really does have access to the Force, but he can only see it.  He can’t use it.  He is a failed padawan, but there is something more to him than someone who didn’t have the Force at all.  He still fakes being a Jedi Master with a stolen lightsaber, and he runs a good game until busted by the smuggler.

Haja is probably a dying species because the Empire is keen to stamp out any traces of the Jedi Order and any ‘fandom’ that might follow it.  Even grifters are dangerous to the absolute authority the Empire wishes to assert.  Haja is playing a dangerous game -- but it’s one that is highly lucrative, because who wouldn’t trust a Jedi?  He’s “one of the few left.”  He’s “in hiding.”   It’s very daring, and he’s selling a romanticized view of the Jedi, as people would like to remember them under an oppressive Empire.  It’s brilliant, but potentially deadly as we saw at the end of Episode 2 of Obi Wan Kenobi.

We can view Haja Estree as either really cynical or really hopeful.  On the one hand, he’s making tons of money off vulnerable people.  On the other hand, he is delivering on what he promised, based on what is conveyed in the TV series.  He is saving people... and the Jedi live a little bit long through him.  He keeps the memory alive.  When it comes down to it, he does try to delay Reva long enough to save Obi-Wan.  There is a moment where he realizes his scam  -- and the Jedi ‘scam’ -- isn’t actually a scam for some people with certain gifts.  He might have liked Obi-Wan, but maybe he didn’t actually believe in this Force thing until that second when Reva dove into his mind.

I do hope Haja survives to flim-flam again.  I think it would be the ultimate irony if he was found to have  a little Force Sensitivity... but only enough to manifest in strange luck or attracting people to him like some bizarre magnet.

Below the cut are ideas about building a Force-Skeptical character -- who might take the form of someone like Haja Estree.

NB:  This is not an Order 66 stan, nor an anti-Jedi one.  Rather, it discusses the crafting of a character that doesn’t believe in the Jedi/Sith ways about the Force.  They don’t buy into the religions/philosophies, but that doesn’t mean they’d be ok with genocide.  It must be acknowledged that canonically, Palpatine played on the skepticism surrounding the Force in the way the Jedi wielded it to make people hostile toward them,  indifferent to their extermination, or terrified that they would be killed alongside the Jedi.  There were still those who were not believers and resisted the propaganda.

Do you believe in magic?

Skeptics have a lot of ways of being doubtful about the Force and its Adherents.  Are they doubting the existence of the Force itself?  Doubting the Light Side/Dark Side thing?  Doubting the Jedi/Sith teachings on it?  Doubting the organizations, rather than the teachings?  This is one thing that needs to be determined early on when making such a skeptical character, especially if they deal with Jedi/Sith on a regular basis. 

Haja Estree made me happy because he’s sort of the “Exhibit A” in a Force skeptic’s portfolio.  It’s a scam -- or at least it doesn’t work like you think it does.  Canonically, Sith and Jedi are relatively rare in the universe.  By the end of the Republic, they’re down to about 10,000 prior to Order 66.  Some of stuff Force Users do is wild -- you’d have to see it to believe it. Your odds of seeing a Force User in action are low, unless you have the misfortune of being in a warzone.

The fake “Jedi” con artist appeals to me because there are people like that in every world -- he’s a ‘real’ character we’ve seen.  We read in the papers ‘couple busted for selling tickets to heaven’ or ‘holy water actually tap water’ in real life. They may have always existed (in fan works or in the EU), but they haven’t really been visualized to this point. 

Eva Corolastor is my OC from SWTOR -- Old Republic Era, wherein the Jedi are more numerous and there is a Sith Empire.  Still, these Force Users are relatively rare.  I’ve headcanonned that, although maybe 10% of the entire Galactic population has some Force Sensitivity, that can manifest as just being really  good at cards or slot machines, great reflexes as a pilot or athlete, seeing the Force but not using it (Guss Tuno), or full-blown “I can chuck rocks with my mind.”  Lucky people may not have enough Force Sensitivity to join the Orders, but they have enough to do well at other things.  I leave the actual number of full-fledged Jedi/Sith ambiguous. 

Haja is the type of charlatan that Eva thinks most Jedi and Sith are. He has magnets and electronics that simulate Force powers.  Haja has partners that make it all possible, from the departure gate to Coruscant -- it’s a little conspiracy.

Eva thinks that’s probably how it all works, up and down the chain.  Eva believes ‘something’ is out there.  She’s not a complete Force atheist.  For her, there are some people that really have ‘something else.’   However,  she thinks the organized religions and philosophies -- the Jedi and the Sith -- are BS.  That’s her verdict later too with Zakuul and their flying dragon god thing.  (It makes so much better sense when it’s the Gravestone; she understands legendary flying ships, as a pilot).  Eva has also impersonated a Jedi once or twice; she knows that these tricks can be done with the right tech, not ‘a connection to the Force.

From a piece posted in 2020:

Eva saw Corso appear at the top of the ladder, having emerged from the cockpit.  He picked up the manual as she finished her climb.  “It was kind of rude that the Sith lady referred to you as ‘inadequate.’”

Eva hoisted herself up to her feet at the top of the ladder.  “To me, they’re actively running a scam – a well-orchestrated scam with religious decorations and feel-good mysticism, whether you like helping people or helping yourself.  They use magnets, anti-grav units, laser lights – high-end con tricks.  I’d feel better about them if they just copped to it.”  Eva took the book from Corso’s hands and the two of them walked back up to the cockpit.

“Ah, but you believe Guss when he senses things.”  Corso waggled a finger at her as they sat down in the pilot and co-pilot seats.

“I totally believe Guss when he senses things.  I believe something is out there in the universe.  You know that.”  Corso nodded; she had said as much in the past.   “I just think the Jedi and the Sith have it wrong, and some of them know it.”

What does the character actually ‘know’ about Force Users? And how do they know it?

An outsider looking in on the Jedi or Sith Orders would have a very different perspective on them compared to someone who is either raised within the Order (but didn’t become a full-fledged member) or has a close relative that joined the Order.  All of those scenarios can result in the facts of the Orders being spun and affect how people feel.  But we also know that information about Jedi and Sith are taught to children in the Empire and the Republic, sensitive or not.  Obviously, there is more fact than fiction in the Old Republic, compared to what people whispered about post Order 66. 

I’ve written Eva as someone who never went to school; her parents were smugglers -- criminals.  In my headcanon, you have to register your ship for distance learning or accredited homeschool curricula -- that’s not an option for career criminals.  So Eva’s education is piecemeal .  She’s highly intelligent, but what she learned was ‘I need to know this for this illicit job.’ She does have blind spots - areas of ignorance.  People with formal educations can also have similar blindspots, but that’s due more to eyerolling dismissal or being more interested in the latest holonet serial instead of class; it happens to all, in some way, on a variety of topics.  Character education does matter, especially when we start treading around conspiracy theories about Force Users. 

Eva does believe a conspiracy is possible.  She is a bit of a troll; she likes riling up Corso, who is very pro Pub, Pro Jedi.  She’ll say to him that Jedi and the Sith are doing these laser light shows with organized backing and professional training.  They put on the show, and they profit -- the get deference, political power, preferred status in educational curricula (there’s how many of then in the galaxy?  And everyone learns about them in school?).   Someone’s gotta build those Temples, and in the Republic, the workers gotta be paid wages and get theri union smoke breaks.  Someone pays: the government, who buys into the Force User scheme...

Some of this is bravado, things that she loudly talks about at bars with other non-Force Sensitives.  Some of it is a byproduct of a narrow education.  Some of it is her knowledge that she -- who is Force-Null as a bantha -- can imitate the effects.  Eva also doesn’t like being bested by Force Users, so it’s a little bit of ego too. How much of this does she believe, really?  Hard to tell.  Eva does start to buy in more to certain aspects of the Force and how it operates after her experiences in KotXX and Echoes of Oblivion... but she will still go to less 'magical’ explanations first. 

That brings up a good point:  what do you think is said about Jedi and Sith in public education in the Star Wars universe? In our world, public educational systems were created in the 1800s to indoctrinate young people:  make good citizens, make a good workforce, and make successful people.  That last one is kinda optional; depending on the priorities of a nation, they either want loyalty or workers most of all, with people doing ‘well’ in life sort of a secondary thing.  This isn’t me being cynical -- this is history, quite literally (but the bit you’re not supposed to say out loud).  What are the galactic standards?  What varies on a planet-by-planet basis?  The Core Worlds and the Seat of the Empire probably have an entire section of school based on their Force Users.  Someone who went through the paces of a public education in the Republic or the Empire would know and have positive impressions of the Jedi or Sith -- or at least a healthy respect for what they could do with their power.   but what about in the Outer Rim or in a colony?   Probably better than an uneducated character, but some things may just not be relevant to them; agriculture may take the place of something else. 

As a result, we have a double-edged sword of Eva’s home education:  she doesn’t buy into what most other people do (lack of political indoctrination) but her education lacks scope.  While the student isn’t burdened by excessively structure and unnecessary factoids, she also lacks knowledge in anything beyond what she’s good at and prepped for by her parents, who are smugglers themselves. They narrow the curriculum -- which leads to bias. 

How do you feel about space wizards?

Haja is also interesting because he doesn’t bear the Jedi any ill-will, personally.   If anything, he’s banking off their good reputation -- and doing some good in a  chaotic way.  That said, was he the sort of guy to stand up and fight against Order 66?  Probably not; survival for him was probably marginal in the first place, and that wasn’t going to feed him.  Does he believe in the Force himself?  Eh, who knows.  They had their gig.  They’re gone now. 

People’s interactions with Sith or Jedi shape their world view of them.  As mentioned above, for many, they are fairy tales, even when they are alive and well in the Old Republic.  There’s so few and they are so fantastical.  However, once they are saved or harmed by a Force User, that will absolutely give them an opinion! 

That opinion may run contrary to how the rest of the galaxy perceives that group: a great example is Din Djarin’s rescue by Deathwatch.  They were ‘bad’ in Star Wars Clone Wars... but they saved him.  We like/love/lust after Din, even as we understand that he’s technically a member of a cult that operates in religious extremes, such as never taking off the helmet.

Din doesn’t see himself as a cult member or an extremist, at least until he meets other Mandalorians.  He still may not, since he wishes to do penance for removing his helmet and violating his religion’s rules (does checking the Dark Saber as luggage count as a religious violation, if weapons are your religion?). In the same way, your character can see of Sith or Jedi as good rather than bad or bad rather than good.  Building a Revanite OC for SWTOR would be an example of this, if your character was rescued by the Cult of Revan. 

With any character looking at a Force User, when not in a ‘saving!’ situation, do they assume benevolent intent or bad intent?  If they think the Force is a scam, is that necessarily a bad thing if good comes from it?  Or do they just sigh and think ‘bless their hearts’ and let them do whatever handwaving they want?  

Personal interactions with the Orders will shape what your character feels about the Force Users.  If you’re jealous of a sibling that got in and you did not -- that changes things. If you feel like your relative was ‘stolen’ -- that changes things.

If you feel like you are special and have the power... but you’re too far away from the Core for anyone to sense you -- that changes things.

However, what if a character views a Sith as a witch?  or a Jedi as a magician?  Are witches good in their society?  Is magic outside the bounds of the sanctioned local religion bad?  Does it automatically come from the ‘bad place’ if it doesn’t explicitly come from the ‘good god’?  Are Force Users blasphemous in some way, by their very nature?  The Force is something supernatural.  There are religious elements to it.  Your character’s own personal religious views -- whether it’s Mandalorian, Trandoshian, or something else -- may come into conflict. 

Or it might not; George Lucas envisioned the whole Force religion thing as Space Buddhism, which is a non-competitive religion.  It doesn’t demand sole adherence; you can be a Buddhist and worship other gods/practice other religions at the same time.  It’s the other religions that DO demand one-god worship or sole adherence that have a problem with multi-tasking here. 

~~

Force-Skeptic characters can be a lot of fun to play around with, but there needs to be nuance and consideration as to how and why they think as they do.  Bigots are easy, as are devotees.  It’s the in-between that can be challenging for writers, but they’re often some of the most interesting characters.

[meandmyechoes]

part 4 feels like an attempt to cater both the dudebros and the girlies and it fell short on both sides. As soon as he got out of the bacta a minute in I’m like, okay I can relax now (because there’s not going to be flashbacks).

I like Obi-wan is dressing, and fighting more like a Jedi now. But I have a feeling that’s not going to be enough for dudebros looking for The General, despite how cool that lights out scene is.

In general I am just not really into its look with the prop lightsabers being actual glowsticks now. They are thicker and not pointy-ended, most importantly you can’t hit as hard as you could like with steel. The slashes feel raw - and practical, but you can see some of his showiness (and confidence) returning with the twirls. They might not be the greatest fight you’ve ever seen, but they are fitting for where Obi-wan is now, and I do appreciate that.

I become nervous again when they take Leia to to the torture room and when Obi-wan discovers the Jedi tomb. But my logic was long gone before he even got into the base.

Still indifferent towards Reva but I’m more accepting with the revelation she really is a madwoman. I salute that she is very committed to her ruthlessness, despite it takes 2/3 of the series to be revealed. Her acting is not as bad as people say for sure, it’s just the script doesn’t require her to do much but an angry or impassive face? I’ll continue to say the script is against Moses’ flavour assigning her a hot-headed debut. This trope for new characters is a guarantee eyebrow-raise for most, particularly in this impatient fandom. It’s also kind of annoying that promo materials and even the blocking of the first episode props her up to ‘main character’ status that you know she can’t die even if Vader threatens her. It circles back to Star Wars being a ‘destined’ story. How do you make the process interesting if everyone alreday know how it’s going to end? The Inquitsitor infighting made me curious last time, if only they would develop #4 and #5 more to make it seem like a fair game. The other thing is assigning Reva a lower number would clear up her motivation to move up instantly? Or they could’ve all been fighting to fill Trilla’s role and leave the Grand Inquisitor unshakable? And with both of them out of the picture, if Reva being #3 is not next in line, then what’s the point of the number system? Do you even have a chain of command?

And Vader’s decision to let Reva live. I don’t have a problem with it save for his line, ‘I underestimated you’. Would’ve been better if he just say ‘You earned another day’ instead of, you know, turning a 180 as if it was some genius move to plant a tracker. It was a fatal mistake just two seconds ago, and by no means is Reva’s words a guaratee they will re-capture Kenobi. Even if you factor in Vader could tell she’s not lying, it rather underplays Vader’s threat to have him sounds like he respects a subordinate or admitted that he was wrong.

Every episode I judge it by ‘Does it have enough Obi-wan (vs. other characters /media)?’ So far it’s quite well-proportioned. There isn’t much thought process or reflection shown on Ewan tonight, so I suppose we are supposed to fill that in with how much meeting Vader (and perhaps meeting the Path) last time changed/reaffrimed him? It feels like, something really important happened and thaey brush it aside. But maybe it’s just episode 4 being the middle episode and they will cover it on the journey home next week. 

I predicted ‘finding Leia’ would be the big plot for the series. Can’t say I’m not a little concerned when I thought that might stray towards action-oriented and too large-scale. So far their interactions paid off, but you do wonder if a lower-stake villain could give these two, who we really came to watch a show for, even more focus. If you’re working on a Mando S1 rehash, might make it a cameo-filled road trip not unlike TBB S1 I suppose. (When they say Florrum I’m begging for Hondo Ohnaka cameo)

I would say ep 4 pales in comparision with the three that came before. It also borderline doesn’t have a cameo. There’s no correlation between the two. But I was suddenly begging for one, either a Hondo mention or since last time in the safehouse, an Ashla. I don’t know. I obtained enjoyment from the show, I am not unwilling to forgo logic to do that. It is enough pleasing to the eye. Honestly don’t care about any comments besides for Obi-wan, Anakin and Leia.

In the end, I hope we get more Hayden out of it. Feels like the chess pieces are pretty much set now and I don’t know how much more ‘surprises’ we can get with the two episodes left. The Grand Inquisitor will come back, Reva will die either because of him or Vader, Bail and Leia reunited and Ben looks over Luke forlornly as twin suns rise, fanfare. I was really hoping it to surpass by next to none expectation even though it was a long shot, by so far it has been... a ‘Pass’ show, like a B/B+, at best. so I don’t dislike it, but definitely not what I expect it to be.

[lifeofkaze]

🕎 for the Amari family, and for Selly please!

Thank you for the ask Bestie 💛 After debating if whether this is about holiday = going away or holiday = Christmas, I'm going for Christmas (excuse my non-native stupidity here if I got it wrong).

🕎 HOLIDAY HEADCANON

Lizzie: Lizzie was always as much a fan of presents as of anything else concerning Christmas. After living with Orion for a number of years, his relative indifference regarding something as "mundane" as presents rubbed off on her a little. She still gets all of her loved ones gifts but her focus shifted to the emotional value of Christmas when she got older.

Reva: One of Reva's favourite traditions is helping her mum bake Christmas cookies. Like Lizzie, she usually doesn't care much for baking or cooking but this is an exception. They put on some Christmas songs and dance off in the kitchen to the music. It's not been unheard of that they burned the cookies because they forgot about them but that's beside the point here. At least they had fun.

Dylan: While the girls goof around bake, Dylan and his father usually go out to find a suitable Christmas tree. Orion doesn't like cutting down a tree for decorative purposes and suggested growing one but after their cats went rampant in their living room Lizzie was absolutely having none of the idea of having a tree in her house all year long, but I digress. Both of them enjoy their time together immensely, just wandering about in the woods, either talking or in silence. They understand each other either way.

Selene: Christmas at the Fraser home in Edinburgh is bleak, boring and dreary. Selene hated every moment of it growing up and always wished she were allowed to stay at school. Since her parents' fallout with her grandparents and uncle, she wasn't allowed to go to the Fraser Estate for the whole of the holidays either and Selene did her best to behave so badly at home that her parents almost had to give in when Ethel's owl came to invite her to Christmas at the Hexley's. It is one of Selene's favourite memories and she is still sure Jim would have made a brilliant method actor.

Ethel belongs to @the-al-chemist

[gnicholasgnicholas]

2021

Young Franco - Underneath (ft. Golden Vessel), Single (Mixing)

Stevan - Hope It’s Not, Single (Mixing)

Golden Vessel - Colt, Album (Mixing)

Young Franco - Fallin’ Apart (ft. Denzel Curry & Pell), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo’s Midnight - Yesteryear, Album (Mixing)

Yorke - Window Shopping, Single (Mixing)

Beso Palma - Without Measure (ft. Gia Vorne), Single (Mixing)

Cafuné - High, Single (Mixing)

G Flip x mxmtoon - Queen (Touch Sensitive rmx), Single (Mixing)

Golden Vessel - Get Forward, Single (Mixing)

Wave Racer - Left Behind, Single (Mixing)

Wave Racer - This N That (ft. LunchMoney Lewis), Single (Mixing)

Nicole Milar - Are You Kidding, Single (Mixing)

Skeleten - Biting Stone, Single (Mixing)

Arno Faraji x Two Another - Just A Phase, Single (Mixing)

Stevan - SIA, Single (Mixing)

Thandi Pheonix - Overdrive, Single (Mixing)

Mel Blue - Cleopatra, Single (Mixing)

Jalmar - La Fiesta, Single (Mixing)

Sachi - Down On My Luck, Single (Mixing)

Cosmo’s Midnight - Titanic, Single (Mixing)

Tseba - Must Be Love (ft. Electric Fields), Single (Mixing)

Hope Tala - Mad (Young Franco remix), Single (Mixing)

Andrey Azizov - TOO LOUD! (ft. Simone), Single (Mixing)

Chase Zera - Supernova, Single (Mixing)

1300 - Smashmouth, Single (Mixing)

Andrey Azizov - Braindead, Single (Mixing)

Genesis Owusu - Smiling With No Teeth, Album (Engineering)

Young Franco - Come Thru (SonReal, Jalmar), Single (Mixing)

Korky Buchek - Look @ Me, Single (Mixing)

Jack Ladder - Astronaut, Single (Engineering)

2020

Willaris. K - Chapel (ft. Wave IQ), Single (Mixing)

Stevan - Ontogeny, EP (Mixing)

Young Franco - Juice (ft Pell), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo's Midnight - Down 4 U (ft Ruel), Single (Mixing)

Genesis Owusu - Don’t Need You, Single (Engineering)

Golden Vessel - That’s Us, Single (Mixing)

Akurei - Serotonin, Single (Writing)

Angus1 - Bound (ft. Elizabeth M Drummon)

Beso Palma x Rissa - Ego, Single (Mixing)

George Maple - Fade, Single (Mixing)

Young Franco - Two Feet (ft. Pell & Dana Williams), Single (Mixing)

Jalmar - Mijo Rico, Single (Mixing)

Roland Tings - Up Close, Single (Mixing)

Winston Surfshirt - Smile, Single (Mixing)

Golden Vessel - That’s Us (ft. The Nicholas and Rei so La), Single (Mixing)

Skeleten - Mirrored, Single (Mixing)

Stevan - Just Kids, EP (Mixing)

Roland Tings - First Wave, EP (Mixing)

Golden Vessel - Midwest, Single (Mixing)

Golden Vessel - Little Bit Wild (ft. Mallrat)

Golding - Alone Together (Touch Sensitive rmx), Single (Mixing)

Juno Mamba - Siargao Dreams, Single (Mixing)

Upsidedownhead - Twice As Tough, Single (Mixing)

Nicole Milar - Boring, Single (Mixing)

Collarbones - Everything I Want, Single (Mixing)

Wave Racer - Summer Rain (ft. Kwame), Single (Mixing)

Winston Surfshirt - Apple Crumble, Album (Mixing)

2019

Mansionair - Shadowboxer, Album (Mixing, Production, tr.1,2, 5, 12,14,16)

Nicole Millar - Favours, Single (Mixing)

Kilter - No Time, Single (Mixing) Client Liaison - Champagne Affection, Single (Mixing) Arno Faraji x Milan Ring - Scalin’, Single (Mixing) Cosmo's Midnight - Have It All, Single (Mixing)

Stevan - LNT, Single (Mixing)

Arno Faraji - Bass Jumpin, Single (Mixing)

Juno Mamba - Flicker, Single (Mixing)

Muki - IKWIL, Single (Mixing)

Wave Racer - AUTO, Single (Mixing)

Stevan - Wam, Single (Mixing)

Vetta Borne - R.I.P, Single (Mixing)

Tim Ayre - Tim Ayre, EP (Mixing)

Kilter - Tmper/One In Hand, Singles (Mixing)

Rufus Du Sol - Underwater (Willaris K Remix), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo's Midnight - C.U.D.I, Single (Mixing)

Breathe - London, Single (Mixing)

Basenji - Perfect Blue (ft. Earthlings), Single (Mixing)

Sakr - Lost Steps, Single (Mixing)

ALTA - Reasons, Album, (Mixing)

Maribelle - Down For You, Single (Mixing)

Young Franco - Otherside (ft Reva De Vito & Golden Vessel), Single (Mixing)

Willaris K - Natural Selection, Single (Mixing)

Clypso - Strange Behaviour / Pop Roll Flow, Singles (Mixing)

Cosmo's Midnight - It's Love (ft Mathew Young), Single (Mixing)

London Topaz - Hideout ft Leonie Kingdom, Single (Mixing)

Riley From Earth - Just Be Over, Single (Mixing)

Roland Tings - Salt Water, Album (Mixing)

Arno Faraji - Bass Jumping, Single (Mixing)

Willaris K - Indifferent (ft Gordi), Single (Mixing)

Section 60 - AVTV Freestyle, Single (Mixing)

SKY’ HIGH - AVTV Freestyle, Single (Mixing)

breathe. - Grace, Single (Mixing)

2018 Cosmo’s Midnight - What Comes Next, Album (Mixing)

Tyde Levi - Goldchains, Single (Mixing)

Willaris. K - Alchemy, EP (Mixing)

Death Cab For Cutie - Gold Rush (Mansionair Remix), Single (Mixing)

Poloshirt - Poloshirt, EP (Mixing)

Portugal The Man - Tidal Wave (Mansionair remix), Single (Mixing)

Rhye - Song For You (Mansionair Remix), Single (Mixing)

Mel Blue - South, Single (Mixing)

Collarbones - Heavy, Single (Mixing)

Dro Carey - Atmosphere (ft Kwame, Ren & Raj Mahal), Single (Mixing)

Dro Carey - Glow Now (ft Taliwhoah & Crooked Letter), Single (Mixing)

Polographia - Heart Attack (ft Rush Midnight), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo’s Midnight - Lowkey (ft Buddy & Jay Prince), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo’s Midnight - Where You Been (ft Boogie), Single (Mixing)

Cosmo’s Midnight - Talk To Me (ft Tove Styrke), Single (Mixing)

Tyde Levi - Sober, Single (Mixing)

2017 Lucianblomkamp - Control Together, Album (Mixing)

Winston Surfshirt - Sponge Cake, Album (Production, Mixing)

Cloud Control - Treetops, Single (Mixing)

Sam Perry - Trust Myself, Single (Mixing)

Collarbones - A.I, Single (Mixing)

Roland Tings - Eyes Closed/Hedonist, Singles (Mixing)

George Maple - Kryptonite, Single (Production, Mixing)

George Maple - Hero, Single (Production, Mixing)

<2016 JOY. - Like Home, Single (Mixing)

Seekae - Turbine Blue, Single (Mixing)

Savoir - Malala, Single (Mixing)

Moon Holiday - Out of Bounds

GNL - TS012

Haliia - With You Forever, Single (Mixing)

Cliques - Dotted, EP (Writing, Mixing, Production)

Cliques - Chro, EP ((Writing, Mixing, Production)

Annie Bass - While I’m Waiting (Mixing)

Hugo Frederick - Skin, EP (Mixing)

Fishing - Shy Glow, Album (Mixing)

Giselle - Silk (Production)

Seekae - The Worry, Album (Writing, Production, Mixing)

Seekae - +DOME, Album (Writing, Production, Mixing)

Seekae - The Sound of Trees Falling On People, Album (Writing, Production, Mixing)

Video

Romance Was Born - Petals On the Wind Campaign (Engineering, Production)

Hyundai - Incredible Made Possible Campaign (Writing, Production)

Optus - This is Enterprise, reimagined (Writing, Production)

Lexus/Semi Permanent - Aperture w Toby and Pete (Writing, Production)

Sony Australia - Never Experienced Campaign (Writing, Production)

Feat. Solar Farm (Engineering)

Lynx Australia/Noisey - Live In Pitch Black (Writing, Production, Performance)

Radio National - Life Matters, Books Plus, Body Sphere, Saturday Extra, Weekend Arts themes (Writing, Production)

[helenbeligirl]

“In all, I had two Ambien but thirty more on the way, twelve Rozerem, sixteen trazodone, around ten each of Ativan, Xanax, and Valium, Nembutal, and Solfoton, plus single digit amounts of a dozen random medications that Dr. Tuttle had prescribed only once “because refilling something this peculiar might trigger speculation by the insurance wizards.”

My Year of Rest and Relaxation, by Ottessa Moshfegh (2019)

Rating: ★★★☆☆

Don’t read this book if you’re triggered by pill popping, sexual abuse, or depictions of self-harming behaviour spurred on my depression. 

The book follows the unnamed female narrator as she attempts to sleep her way through a full year. Unable to handle her trauma and depression despite her privilege, she tries her best to check out of life with increasingly dangerous combinations of pills.

This book was polarising to many, because the notion of an “unlikeable” female protagonist seems to trigger a collective rage response in the general population. With all the fuss about the narrator, it’s hard to find a review that dips beyond praising or critiquing that, but at the end of the day, I find myself unable to talk about much else either. The narrator makes the book, for better or worse, but I personally had no issue with her. I thought Moshfegh laid out a great case study for the depressed mind (and where can I get my hands on some Infermiterol to sleep the covid-year away?), but ultimately the book made me wonder if I’d wasted my time. The pacing is languid and lethargic, like the narrator’s state of mind, but it still leaves you turning the page, at least out of mild curiosity.

I read it in May and wrote a one sentence review about it, but three months later, I don’t have much more to say. It’s a very good example of what I feel an American MFA novel is - deft prose, sharp socio-cultural observations, digging deep into the grisly meat that no one likes to touch, but ultimately failing to become substantial* enough to be of much merit. Subsequently they’re held up to be the standard for literary fiction, and the cycle rinses and repeats itself, producing more of the same drivel.

(*not just substance - sometimes they’re not even mildly interesting.)

I didn’t find it particularly thought-provoking or new, perhaps because the depiction of depression (the numbness, the cynicism) was quite accurate to my reality. Maybe also because I’m not unfamiliar with how casually cruel and inconsiderate people can be while still remaining the heroes of their own stories. 

The narrator’s description of her best friend summed up a very real adult reality that I’ve chosen to check out of, but several of my friends continue to remain stuck in with old high school best friends.

“I loved Reva, but I didn’t like her anymore. We’d been friends since college, long enough that all we had left in common was our history together, a complex circuit of resentment, memory, jealousy, denial, and a few dresses I’d let Reva borrow, which she’d promised to dry clean and return but never did.”

It’s interesting how a lot of people I know find themselves caught in circles with friends they don’t quite like or care for any longer, unwilling to have a tough conversation to change the case or unaware that the conversation can be had at all. Friendships are often overlooked and taken for granted - we think our romantic relationships need work and our friendships will fix themselves, but that’s never the case. The narrator and Reva’s friendship is nothing unique, though some reviewers seem to be completely horrified at the thought.

The unflinchingly real portrayal of the insidious cruelty that lies under people who never self-reflect is the book’s single triumph. I’d like to think that people aren’t as selfish as the characters around the narrator, but the unfortunate truth is that a lot of us are, often despite our best intentions to the contrary. I think that’s something a lot of people find a little disturbing, maybe hitting too close to home in ways that are difficult to grapple with or reconcile. 

This book wasn’t bad by any means, and the fuss about the narrator is totally unwarranted, though other readers might feel differently. Even so, I’m indifferent to it. Read it if you must, but you’re not missing out if you don’t.

Reiterating what I wrote on top: if you’re in a position where you feel like your depression could be triggered easily or you could relapse into self-harming behaviours, give this book a miss. Trust me. It’s nothing special, but it’ll do you more harm in the long run if you read it. 

[ineffablefate]

i came to haunt the fragrances of staggered light. i came to hunt the wild quiet hinged to the shadow of whisper. i came to carve a space in our forgetful. i came to crave the forever untouchable. i came to close the ghost circuit press. i came too close, went broke on infinite breath. i came to drink of my thirst. i came to murder a hunger starving for its own stop. i came to sleep inside the dreaming. i came to sing the names beyond my grasp of meaning. i came to shun the cold and wear the fire's fleeting. i came to taste the indigo morning, the clear silver rains, the tongues of the flowers honeying. i came to devour the insatiable lover. i came to drown the grower in the sound of water. i came to call out the night's echo. i came to measure the stretch of the only number. i came to play a losing victory. i came to stage a framed epiphany. i came to rage against an endless indifference. i came to leave the scars of passage. i came to collect my debt of sorrow. i came to spill what will never fill our endless hollow.

revas // reason for being

[niitroglycerin-blog]

'your secret is safe with my indifference.'

crit role starters || accepting

❝ you know what i love about you revas? do you wanna know?          talking to you is like yelling into an empty cave. i get to do my favorite thing -- hear myself talk -- and i never have to fuckin’ worry about any of it getting out. goes right through you. not a cell spared to give a fuck. must be what having a diary feels like. ❞

[worldknowshername]

Jessica Jones

send me a tv series and I’ll tell you:

my all-time ultimate fave character: Jessica, obviously

a character I didn’t used to like but now do: Clemmons

a character I used to like but now don’t: Um... I never really liked them? But my tolerance for Simpson, Dorothy, and Kilgrave goes down with every rewatch

a character I’m indifferent about: The twins.

a character who deserved better: HOPE, Malcolm, Jessica, Trish, Luke, that poor couple Kilgrave made murder his dad...

a ship I’ve never been able to get into: Jeri/Pam

a ship I’ve never been able to get over: JESSICA/LUKE SORRY NOT SORRY

a cute, low-key ship: Malcolm/Claire? Also Jessica/Trish and I’ve seen Jessica/Malcolm floating around which I could get into?

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it: Idk? Jessica/Malcolm maybe? But also they’re the best brotp

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened: TRISH/SIMPSON. Self respect, get some.

my favourite storyline/moment: Jessica and Trish shutting Simpson the fuck down that time he tried to talk over them. Also their entire reconciliation? It was so good. Also Luke and Jessica’s one date of bad flirting sandwiched between sex that destroyed everything they owned. (Fucking chill.)

a storyline that never should have been written: Jessica killing Reva was a super unnecessary change from the comics. There’s just a lot of reasons why it didn’t need to happen. Also while Stick would be happy to know Jessica has the lung capacity and strength to perform a manual decapitation underwater, I didn’t need to know that. (The second one was necessary. The first one.... not so much.)

my first thoughts on the show: Let’s just say I watched it in full twice the day it dropped and leave it at that.

my thoughts now: WHERE THE FUCK IS SEASON 2? WHY DID I HAVE TO WAIT EIGHTEEN MONTHS BETWEEN JESSICA , TRISH, AND MALCOLM APPEARANCES? YOU REALLY COULDN’T SQUISH A CAMEO INTO THE FILLER IN DAREDEVIL, LUKE CAGE, AND IRON FIST???