#iruka talk

[tamelee]

Hey!

I love your analysis so much! You are the most impartial and nice person I met here so far ❤️❤️❤️

What do you think about the theory that Naruto invented harem jutsu because he wanted to get some men attention? It’s a little messed up since he was a kid, but I mean… Little girls have crushes on grown up men, boys probably have the same (Not saying he was doing it because he crushed on everyone in the village!) but there were times that he didn’t do it to gain something or anything. I’m confused. And I know that probably most of it was just for the fan service, but… I guess I like to have everything to make sense. I would love to hear you opinion on that!

Hi Nonee, thankyou so much ;-; 🧡🫶!! What a sweet thing to say! Hm' I don't think that's the right approach to the topic.. at all. In fact, I think that's very wrong tbh..

..we're talking about a neglected child here. Naruto created the Jutsu because he knows men think a certain way and thinks they're idiots for it. In the beginning he calls the villagers morons and he's quite full of himself (saving face) despite failing in class. Naruto is painfully aware of his own flaws though and so.. has an alternative for shits and giggles because he knows the reaction it'll draw out of men and laughs in their faces.

He gets scolded for it but remember, negative attention is still attention to a deprived and neglected mind of a child.

And yes, attention towards his existence, but it has nothing to do with sexual attention from Naruto's perspective. (wth.) For Naruto that's not why he's doing it and I think it's really weird to (whomever did to) suggest that. Big difference there because for Naruto it is a way to cause trouble as he knows he's already hated (at this point didn't know why) and it is a way to pay them back because they're (as grown men and 'elite Shinobi') humiliated for their severe reactions towards his Jutsu regardless of how negatively they think about him.

Let's see some examples.

Naruto got manipulated into stealing a super forbidden and dangerous scroll and somehow was easily able to do so by using this Jutsu on the Hokage and walked away with it without a problem for hours thanks to it... Apparently it was more effective than whatever Mizuki had in store because he needed a kid to get to the scroll. Obviously Naruto at this point is just toying with all these people and it makes sense that despite him glorifying the name 'Hokage' he doesn't think very highly of Hiruzen or men who fall for it. That's not to say he doesn't respect them in other regards, because he loved Iruka and Jiraiya. But still. "The nose-bleeder":

Ebisu earned his closet-pervert-name for a reason and Naruto wasn't happy with getting training from him instead of Kakashi.

He called Naruto trash at first, thought so lowly of him and told Konohamaru that if he decided to hang out with him longer he'd become stupid (like Naruto).

Naruto used his KBnJ and Ebisu got cocky about it... until..

Because Naruto knows it works. As in "who's stupid now? You fall and get defeated by my Jutsu despite me being all these things you say I am. You loser/pervert."

So later, Naruto even said that Ebisu was 'weaker than him' because he fell for the Jutsu and I think that says a lot about Naruto's perspective on the matter. Especially because he says it so.. passionately and he reeeaallyyy didn't want any training from him.

When he meets Jiraiya for the first time he severely disliked the man. Naruto screams and scolds him for the nasty book, peeping at the women in the bath, being a pervert and committing a crime, he calls Jiraiya a liar and flips him the bird..

It's genuinely wild. Naruto is wild I'll tell ya.

But then it gets more interesting.. because for some weird reason Kishimoto thinks he should let Jiraiya say during their argument that "he doesn't like men!!!".

Which is strange imo because Naruto is a child and not a man and it has nothing to do with his request for training. So what would that do to Naruto?? He's basically saying: "I won't train you because I don't like you the way you are, thus you have to transform into the thing I do like for me to change my mind because that's the only thing stopping me from training you." And what information has Naruto at this point? He knows shallow minded men fall for his Sexy no Jutsu easily, he knows and scolded Jiraiya just a minute ago for his book, peeping and being a pervert.. Naruto is actually so much smarter than people give him credit for (throughout the entire story actually)- put two and two together and he's forced to:

.. exactly.

Naruto even tried to compliment the "nasty book" first even though he obviously didn't mean it before resorting to this Jutsu knowing and even having said before that such behavior is distasteful doing so to humiliate and manipulate Jiraiya to get what he wants (because again, he thinks they're all idiots for this specific reason only). Naruto is very aware about the situation. He doesn't do it for attention, he does it to get trained and Jiraiya quite literally said "I don't like you, you're a rude brat, why would I train you anyway? I don't like men." So what's the alternative? Become a woman (in this case desirable to Jiraiya) and manipulate this fool into getting to train him.

Naruto is extremely uncomfortable and the second Jiraiya suggests he stays that way throughout the training he undoes the Jutsu immediately and gets angry. He throws more insults towards Jiraiya like "pervert" "nasty Sannin" and calls him "totally crazy". He doesn't enjoy to get perved on, he enjoys humiliating them for being fooled so easily because their first impressions of them weren't great to say the least. Iruka always scolded him, Ebisu called him literally trash and Jiraiya was literally the worst at first. Notice how he didn't try using it during the Bell Test on Kakashi for example. He wasn't nice but it wasn't personal towards Naruto.

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Meaningful Highlights from Naruto Retsuden:

“Don’t give me that!” A vein popped up on Naruto’s forehead. “Which is more important—the future of the village or my life?!” “Your life,” came Sasuke’s immediate response.

The fact that among the people Naruto wishes could see Konoha in an era of peace includes Zabuza and Haku, because twenty years later, they still live on in his heart.

Yamato and Mitsuki having a strong friendship, where Yamato is the first person Mitsuki greets upon coming home, tells about his missions, and brings strawberry daifuku as a treat, coming full circle for Yamato be an important figure for a child with similar origins.

Naruto reflecting on how grateful he is to be Hokage during peace time: “After Old Lady Tsunade became Hokage, her first job was to treat shinobi injured in battle. When Master Kakashi became Hokage, his was to hold the ceremony commemorating the anniversary of those who died in the Great Ninja War. With the Fourth … I dunno what his first job was, but with the era being what it was, I’m pretty sure he had plenty of unpleasant work [...] And the first thing I did when I became Hokage was give a business license to a traditional sweet shop in the old city. Makes you laugh, right? That’s peace.”

The fact the Sakura says she's going to leave Sarada in the care of someone both her and Sasuke trust, and the reveal that that person is Iruka, who was the first teacher to both of them!

Shikamaru responding to Naruto bowing his head to Team 7 for helping him with, “The Hokage can’t go bowing his head to just anyone.” And Naruto's narration replying: He wasn’t bowing to just anyone. He was bowing to them.

Naruto's response to Sasuke trying to help him at the cost of his own life: If the opposite meant sacrificing Sasuke, then a lifetime of never being able to use chakra was a hundred times better.

Naruto's narration explaining that Team 7 has their own special meet-up spot where they watch fireworks and drink together during festivals and how they make it clear that both Sai and Yamato were invited and welcome!!

[asleep-m]

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Guy whose fave character is jiraiya: Jiraiya is the father figure iruka never was

Me, giving aggressive thumbs down: HOW???? WHAT???? WHAT THE FUCK R U TALKING ABOUT?????? JIRAIYA IS THE FUCKING WORST!!!!

Him: Cite your evidence!

Me: WHERE THE FUCK DO I BEGIN???

[konohaforestfire]

How he holds your hand pt. 2

Part 1 era & up | Minors DNI

📖 Kakashi

Now for a man who always has his hands in his pockets, Kakashi sure does love holding your hand. 

Especially after all the trauma, he is a solitary creature, yet he loves people like Gai and you who pull him out of his habits.

If he’s taking you out on a date or a walk, he’s gonna slip a hand into yours and tug you along. 

As we know he can easily read his books one handed, so the other hand is free for different things. Like holding your hand.

Honestly he’s so blase about it, but it warms him so much to see you smile and sigh with your hand in his. 

He’s the type to go grocery shopping together around town and use your interlocked hands to point at shops and items. 

If he’s propped up on his bed reading, and you’re on his lap with him, he’ll hold your hand while he reads with the other. 

This man also loves to grip your wrist and pet at the pulse point with his thumb. 

Now he’d get too flustered with too much pda, but if you and him are on a double date with Asuma and Kurenai he’s def holding your hand without any fanfare. 

When you’re older after he’s retired from being the Hokage, he has no issues walking hand in hand all the time. 

He loves doing “old people” things with you, and has even attempted to hold your hand while you’re gardening and cooking. 

He’s even dramatically pouted (to tease you) if you don’t let him. 

🌳Yamato

Yamato loves holding your hand so much.

Honestly after you were official, he started making it a thing that he holds your hand all the time. 

Yamato loves recognition and praise, and he needs everyone to know you’re his special person, his love. 

Yamato can be shy, but the fact that someone loves him this much means he’s just happy to be with you. 

He’ll have all the upcoming festivals and events on a calendar so he can have time to hold your hand in front of others.

He holds it pretty normally, but if you do any interlocking of fingers he will blush and whisper affections to you. Especially about how cute you are.

If you’re at home and relaxing with him, especially with your hands occupied, he’ll think about how he can get to holding your hand. 

Yamato will end up deciding on pulling you close and just holding you instead. Another very needy person. 

🕳Genma

He’s sooo rude, he can’t take shit seriously. 

Man is purely unserious. (look at him!! awful man!)

Y’all aren’t even dating, you’re in a situationship and he’s trying to hold your hand. 

One time you guys were hanging out and he quickly grabbed your hand and used some old fashioned terms and pointed out a cute gift at a shop. (Probably a plushie or something)

The man running the shop asked Genma if he was thinking of getting it for his wife… and he said yes! Raising your held hand up to show you were together. 

He then let that man give you it on a discount and walked you home shocked holding your hand. 

At your door, he kissed it and then let you know he wouldn’t be able to get dinner tomorrow because he had to hang out with Anko.

I hate this man stg. 

He also likes trying to hold your hand if all the jonin are having a hang out to try and make fun of Kurenai and Asuma. 

It’s okay though they “talked” some sense into him for playing with you, and the next time he tried to hold your hand:

Well… you told him no, and he said he was just trying to hold his s/o’s hand, he said it so softly and seriously, you let him take it. 

And he squeezed it and took his senbon out and kissed you while whispering apologies and still holding your hand. 

He also changed how your hands were linked so he could pin you back against the wall with that hand and give you more kisses. 

Hate him so much, smh.

🎓Iruka

Now Iruka is a teacher and that’s the only reason he’ll be cautious about holding your hand. 

It’s not that he’s not madly in love with you, it’s that kids do not shut up about these things. 

He doesn’t want them distracted by his relationship (which is so damn silly)

But he’s def linking your fingers if it’s at an event where he knows he won’t see the kids. 

Honestly sometimes he puts time aside for late night walks 

(Or late night dinner after he’s finished grading) so he can hold your hand around the city in peace.

But the kids will end up seeing, and it will spread. It was two girls who were out with their moms doing some later afternoon shopping and they spread that back to Konohamaru and Crew, then it got to Naruto and Sakura, and then it got to everybody. 

Actually a lot of the chunin and jonin didn’t even know you two were dating and because it’s Iruka it just becomes a whole thing if any of them see you together and you’re not holding hands. 

Poor Iruka, he just gets bright red at all the teasing, ‘Hey Iruka-sensei your girlfriend is right there why aren’t you holding her hand?’

His students ‘Iruka-sensei! My mom said she holds my dad’s hand because she loves him, do you love s/o?” 

Kakashi is actually the worst offender somehow. 

Naruto actually thinks it’s really cute and he reacts to it kinda like he did his Minato and Kushina’s love story. (excuse me I’m crying brb)

📝Jiraiya (yes he should be in jail… yes I would send him my check for commissary)

If you catch Jiraiya (or possibly read these as Jiraiya/Tsunade headcanons) he’s usually just got a hand on your lower back. 

He likes to give you nice back rubs, and surprisingly they don’t turn into anything unless you were alone in your room together 

Though if you were in a crowded street etc, he’s grabbing your wrist with his big hand and making sure you stay tucked in against him.

He also likes to throw an arm over your shoulder at restaurants and link your fingers from there. 

He’ll even pout and ask you to give him your hand from that weird angle. 

Or he’ll have his arm wrapped behind your back and hold your hand that’s at your side. 

Surprisingly he is a hand kisser. He likes to play the gentleman and kiss the back of it all the time. 

Say you need him to help steady you as you fix your shoe, or get over a puddle he’ll kiss it before he drops it down…. Still holding your hand, and now you��ll be walking like that.

[dark-elf-writes]

Naruto, crouching on Iruka’s chest: would I still be your favorite student if I was a worm?

Iruka, blinking sleep out of his eyes: How did you get into my house?

[thebloodredraven]

Thinking about how Naruto went through so many missions, so much trauma, so much personal growth, and so many trials and tribulations while wearing the headband of the one adult ninja that cared about him enough to look after him when no one else could stand to be around him

[faun-buns]

gay man watches naruto 1 time, now has obsession with beautiful men with long hair. it's me btw I'm the gay man

[strangefl0wer]

You know what, if you're not multishipping, you're missing out. Not to hate but, like, you are missing out on so many headcanon hoarding ideas and you can just bounce around at any time and continue blissfully ignoring canon because it sucks.

I mean, just

Kakashi/Iruka

Kakashi definitely doodles on Iruka's papers which he pretends to be annoyed about

Coparents

Iruka fighting for his life to get Kakashi into a regular sleep schedule (not working)

Kakashi/Yamato

Mission cuddles/hand holding

Helping each other through PTSD moments

Kakashi's relentless teasing and 'I can make anyone do what I want'

Kakashi/Itachi

Tired men

More PTSD assistance

They'd definitely go stargazing

Sasuke/Naruto

Highkey soulmates

Sasuke is super stubborn and Naruto waits for him to be done to be like "Can I have a kiss tho"

Sasuke hates how flustered he gets, Naruto doesn't even do it on purpose

Sasuke/Hinata

She's nice and he's nice because of her

He is going to fight her dad

She's going to actually listen to him when he needs to be sad about everything

Hinata/Ino

Hinata definitely didn't know two girls were legally allowed to kiss

Ino loves making her blush with little bits of affection

Very soft

Hinata/Sai

I kinda made this one up

He'd thinks she's cute and then get way too close investigating her blushes

She'd think he's pretty weird but reminds her of Shino which makes her feel safer

She'd get all surprised when he draws her

Ino/Sai

Sai draws the flowers from her shop

Ino likes dressing him up and doing makeup for him

Help each other cope post-war

Temari/Shikamaru

The best living couple in canon sorry I don't take arguments

Temari does his eyeliner

And also steals his clothes

He plays with her hair while they cuddle

Naruto/Hinata

Once she's over being super red all the time, she wants forehead kisses all the time

He loves loudly telling people that she's his gf and then wife

He just randomly picks her up

Neji/Tenten

I don't know they're just cute

They like to just relax together and braid each others hair

[keepyourpantsongohan]

While we are discussing Nyaruto, the descriptions of the cats on the Nyaruto website make me insane (complimentary). Whoever wrote these, I am nodding and shaking your hand. 

[mythcaels]

someone come get sasuke for literally saying some shit like

You can't have problems if the person causing them isn't breathing.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Thoughts on baby sasunaru, like academy days where Sasuke realizes ‘shoot, I like this idiot’ after Naruto is carried into the class room laughing by disheveled ANBU who had to chase him around the town for 3 hours.

Anon I've been thinking abt this all day

[holly-natnicole]

If Team 7 were DigiDestineds (Part 1):

(Legally adopted as a teen by Umino Iruka) Uzumaki Naruto's Crests would be Hope (Virtue) and Greed (Sin). Her digivice is a medium orange D-Ark/D-Power (which lacks the card slot and) which has a crimson rim (around the screen) & matching buttons & a likewise strap with the clip for attaching the digivice to things being medium orange. The digivice's dark grey square screen has 1 of Naruto's Crests appear on it in medium orange whenever he connects with her Digimon partner emotionally in ways that link to the either of the 2 Crests. He has

Relemon,

Pokomon/Viximon,

Renamon,

Kyūbimon, &

Taomon as her Digimon partner.

Her nickname is Kurama and she's female, but fine with using male or gender-neutral pronouns. The duo initially don't get along beyond the moment that formed their spiritual connection & caused the digivice to appear, neither understanding the other at all; but they eventually manage to bit by bit re-connect which is why Kurama can digivolve with Naruto's help. The culmination of their platonic bond lets them (with Kurama in her Renamon form) matrix digivolve into

Sakuyamon.

Other digivolutions Kurama has over the course of her & Naruto's adventures:

she digivolves from her Relemon form into

Sunmon, from which she digivolves into

Coronamon, from which she digivolves into

SilverKyūbimon, from which she digivolves into

SilverTaomon..

(To be continued in Part 2!!)

[dark-elf-writes]

Hot for Teacher in a nutshell:

Iruka: That’s so irresponsible! What if Naruto gets hurt?

Kakashi: …

Naruto: *held up by one ankle, cackling, asking to go higher*

Kakashi: Idk he seems fine

Iruka: *kill bill sirens*

[fightaers]

“we were supposed to be just friends.” ( naruto @ iruka

ah... so they're at that stage, huh ?

iruka supposes he shouldn't be surprised. with sasuke having been gone, followed by all those threats to the village, and then the war transpiring ... iruka himself hadn't considered the expected trajectory a young teenage boy had ought to go through as they left one facet of their life to the next. it's unfortunate, but naruto was at the centre of every conflict up until only recently; he was one of the main reason the world of shinobi today could achieve a new era of peace. at what time could he reasonably indulge himself in any romantic trysts and hesitant crushes ?

the thought alone, like any thoughts when it came to imagining naruto having fought the battles he did for as long as he have, stirs something sour in iruka. a wish that he'd been– stronger, maybe, so that he may aided naruto more. or he'd been braver, so naruto will never doubt he was alone out there if iruka had just had the courage to print out the adoption paper like he, years ago, initially wanted to. either or — he's here now, and iruka smiles at this, forlorn but fond, taking a breath.

as though to reaffirm: finally, maybe this time you could just be a boy, naruto.

iruka joins him at the zataku, putting the blonde's portion of their dinner tonight — beef gyudon, only because iruka had fought naruto on it — in front of him as he does so. ❛⠀yeah ... those things tend to creep up on you, huh ? ❜ iruka rearranges himself across, ❛⠀but you know, naruto – i think you should be a bit braver about it. it's ... scary, i know. but it's a good experience: loving someone like that, even at the risk of getting hurt. ❜

@fighterbound — midnights (3am edition)

[im-still-watching-anime]

i think the root of the konoha officials issue of naruto always being Involved™️ when they don’t want him to be is that they never fully get kakashi on their side about it. if they gave the man a strong enough reason to keep his kid out of it two seconds later he would be talking to naruto like “oh! naruto what’s that over there!” while pointing at a bowl of ramen under a box propped up by a stick and it would be THE most effective method they could take to keep that boy out of things cause you know mr. no thoughts head empty would fall for that immediately