#it is simultaneously true that i should be allowed to avoid my triggers and that other disabled people shouldnt have to be aware that

[arcaneyouth]

having a chronic illness/disability and also having medical trauma is a bitch for obvious reasons but also like. being part of the disabled community n stuff. like yeah i want to show my love and support for disabled people and i dont want to be uncomfortable when they talk about their experiences. if they talk about specific experiences i will stop breathing while the panic hits me like many bricks

[ourrightside]

The Push and Pull Theory - Truth & Love

In light of the spooky season approaching us, it dawned upon me to research more about a topic most twenty-something year olds avoid talking about: Love.

And it had me wondering: what really is love, and does it even exist?

A few existential crises later, I decided love is based upon the push and pull theory.

After failing to push through my scientific courses in high school (that required a lot of pulling left side brain energy); I discovered that the notion of love is proven through history but is based on not-so ironically quantitative topics.

Ultimately, love comes down to attraction - and not in a superficial way so keep reading to understand why.

A simple thought that pops into your head has some sort of vibrational frequency. And from whatever I learned in-between naps in physics class, quantum mechanics has explained that a wave frequency can be altered with its own definition of peaks and pitfalls; which is the ongoing energy we face throughout our journey in this life. And what makes up and holds our galaxy together? Mostly stars. 

And the stars, they really resonate with us. The stars are the stars we lean on to foster our inspiration, grow our imagination, alleviate our stress and remind us how small we really are.

Continuously romanticized in our culture, stars are merely huge balls of gas that contain so much bullshit; that it radiates gravity that ultimately holds our existence together.

Our very own sun is a star that was fortunately too far to pull us in and burn us into ashes. 

The gravity of stars is so strong that it squeezes the gas atoms together so tightly, triggering a nuclear fusion; the process of having the center nuclei of atoms get stuck together and fuse. This process releases a powerful magnitude which in turn contributes to the heat of the stars. This energy works its way from the inside to the surface; then far into space.

In conclusion, our naked eye gets to see the end result of a couple to a million years ago. 

And each star that radiates such light is unique in its own special way, with its different sizes, colors and frequencies. 

Some stars even orbit around each other; we call them binary stars. And even stars - they get lost into the far galaxy, so what chance do we really have? When even something so much bigger and brighter than us loses itself.

With all its glory, these stars have their own magnetism. And with magnetism, there is always resistance. There is no other way.

Even if you are in the most perfect dynamics of love - there is always someone pulling or resisting because that is the law of attraction; like does not attract like.

And if you don’t believe me, try pushing someone. Do it and say I said so. But chances are, they’re going to push you back and that’s not my problem. But if you go ahead, grab someone’s hand and pull them towards you, they will inevitably have to pull away from you at some point. 

When you look towards grasping for something you really want, chances are it’ll stop you. Working to repel something may actually contribute to you waking up one day and finding it sleeping right next to you in your very own bed.

And no you don’t have shitty luck, it’s really always been this way.

If you have never realized it yet, then you will figure it out soon enough.

We have all experienced being the puller or the shoved one. We all starred in either being the lover or the beloved.

The role of the beloved is to resist; otherwise we wouldn’t have all these collections of sad beautiful love songs. However, the best pieces of art are the ones that make you sad because that’s what makes love worth meaning - it’s your goal to reach.

The journey is on-going, much like the wave frequency, with its high and its lows; but when it reaches a plateau, love dies.

And if you are about to click off because whatever I am saying is truthful, don’t be upset about being a lover - we all are.

Actually, there is something so divine about being the lover and so dogmatic when being beloved. In the dynamics of these binary stars or two average mortals with a connection, there is always someone who is beloved in this space or time but is simultaneously a lover for someone else’s pleasure because it is impossible to believe that there is one person in the universe for you.

Defining someone as your one and true soulmate makes us human beings. Notice though that human beings are constantly perpetrating terrible massacres to their emotional wellbeing because they are committing to something that is not true.

To leave as a lover is a crime, but the beloved is supposed to do so. This notion of separation is so vital because the separation is a test; the hardship is what creates the journey. 

But don’t get it twisted, the beloved is supposed to respond, not with the same cry of affection. Ironically, no response is a response at times.

With an increase in philosophy and education, the beloved has become more resistant towards the lover because they understand that there is no obligation to reciprocate feelings.

It may seem like nothing is harder than watching your beloved not understand your love, but the reality is: you are part of the majority. 

And no, you should not go beg for sympathy or deem yourself as doomed either. Instead, you should try your hardest to express yourself and fight for what you believe in, even if your object of desire is begging you to stop.

And you may reach your goal or simply move on because there are billions of stars left.

But the thing is:

your love is truth; it resemblance of what you think the truth is. The truth is what you aim to seek. And my truth is to just live in the heat of things because there is no meaning to love essentially. 

Because it is the one thing that allows you to understand why you have these tingly feelings; essentially there is no right reason for it.

[ziezie13]

Feeling Touch Starved

These last few weeks I have been feeling desperately, hopelessly touch starved which is not a new feeling for me but I have never felt it to this degree. Normally I can more or less cope, but for some reason, in this age of social distancing, seven months into quarantine I am overwhelmed with this need for physical touch. My sleep schedule is completely wrecked and I don’t want to anything even though I am not depressed. I thought it was hormones at first, but I have felt this way for weeks now and it has become clear it is defiantly touch starvation. So today I did what I do best: research. I figured I would share what I found here in case someone else finds this helpful. Maybe sometime in the future I will create a graphic summarizing the important stuff, but if you want to skip all the boring background stuff you can find the coping strategies I discovered at the bottom. 

What Does It Mean to Be Touch Starved?

People are meant to touch each other. It is part of our programing. When we don’t get that physical connection we need, we become touch starved. Of course, each person is unique and have different limits in terms of how much physical touch we need but the underlying need remains the same.

“When someone is [touch] starved, it’s like someone who is starved for food. They want to eat, but they can’t. Their psyche and their body want to touch someone, but they can’t do it because of… fear. Whether that is a fear of breaking cultural norms, personal anxiety, or spreading COVID-19.” 

- Dr. Asim Shad, professor and executive vice chair of the Menninger Department of Psychiatry at Baylor College of Medicine

Touch starvation doesn’t not only apply to intimate or sensual touch but encompasses all forms of tactile interaction: handshakes, friendly hugs, pats on the back, etc.

Touch starvation is pervasive around the world, but it is more common in countries and cultures that are touch averse, such as the United States. Growing up in this culture, my brain has come to associate nearly every form of physical contact as sexual, even when I know this is not true. This is a big problem for me, being asexual. I catch myself wanting to initiate physical contact with my friends but I never do. Instead I sit there just thinking about it. I know it wouldn’t be a sexual touch, but do they know that? Would they think I am weird? Would it make them uncomfortable? And so on and so forth. I can never seem to break through this wall.

Why is touch important?

Skin-to-skin contact is vital for not only mental and emotional health, but physical health, too.

When you feel overwhelmed or pressured, the body releases the stress hormone cortisol. Cortisol triggers the body’s “flight-or-fight” response, which can increase heart rate, blood pressure, respiration and muscle tension, and can suppress the digestive system and immune system. Every single physical disease including heart attack, diabetes, hypertension, asthma is affected by anxiety, stress, depression, or other mental health issues. One of the best ways to counteract these affects is skin-to-skin contact.

Touch stimulates pressure receptors in the skin that transport signals to the vagus nerve. The vagus nerve is the longest nerve in the body, and is connected with the parasympathetic nervous system. It touches every major organ, and helps you rest and digest. Stimulating the vagus nerve sends signals to slow the pace of the nervous system there-by reducing stress.

In addition to the vagus nerve, scientists have found that nerve endings in the skin, known as C-tactile afferents, exists to recognize any form of gentle touch. Stimulating these nerves results in an immediate release of oxytocin. Oxytocin increases positive, feel-good sensations of trust, emotional bonding and social connection, while simultaneously decreasing fear and anxiety responses in the brain. For this reason, oxytocin is affectionately known as the “cuddle hormone.”

How do you know if you’re touch starved?

There’s no definitive way to know if you are touch starved. But pay attrition to what your mind and your body are telling you. This is in no way a comprehensive list, but signs to look out for include:

feelings of depression

feelings of loneliness or exclusion

anxiety

stress

irritability or aggression

issues with body image

low relationship satisfaction

difficulty sleeping

a tendency to avoid secure attachments

I realized that I was touch starved when I saw a couple posts about it on Tumblr and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. In the past when I have spent time with my friends, I have found my mind wandering to thoughts of what it would be like to reach out and touch them: to hold their hand, to hug them, to lean on them, to play with their hair, etc. But I have always been afraid to act on these impulses. When I get my hair cut or have a massage I relish in the sensation of physical touch, because I am not getting it from anywhere else. I have never realized until now that physical touch is something that I have been missing in my life. But reflecting now, it is really obvious and is probably contributing to my issues of stress and anxiety.

What if you don’t particularly like being touched — can you still be touch starved?

YES! Absolutely.

Touch is an intimate thing and it is something we link closely to trust. For a lot of people, it is difficult to initiate physical connection for various reasons. It can be hard to determine what level of touch is appropriate i.e. should you go for a hug or a handshake. People on the neurodiverse or asexual spectrums are also often uncomfortable with touching. People’s comfort level with touch varies with their personality as well as their background. Statistically, people who grew up with touchy-feely families or cultures are going to be more comfortable with physical connection. Touch deprivation can actually create a self-reinforcing cycle where we feel alienated from others and therefore begin to shy away from social contact.  

However, just because someone doesn’t like being touched under normal circumstances doesn’t mean that they can’t find themselves touch starved. In a general sense I don’t like being touched. On several occasions I have found myself physically cringing away from other people’s touch, even when it is not sexual or inappropriate. I think that a part of this can be attributed to the fact that I am asexual, but I also think that the culture I was raised in and my own personality contribute to this as well. I am an introverted person; I never initiate physical contact and yet I crave it in my day-to-day life. For me I need to reach a certain level of comfort with someone before thoughts of physical contact come into my head. My comfort level also varies from day-to-day and with my mood.

So now that I know what the problem is, how can I fix it?

In case you weren’t aware physical contact is not recommended at this time due to the fact that there is an international pandemic. So, while nothing can wholly replace the benefits of positive human touch, I have uncovered a few coping strategies:

Video chatting

video chatting is, reportedly, about 80 percent as effective as in-person contact at releasing those feel-good chemicals

Physical exercise such as yoga or dance

exercise has proven an effective way to increase the release of oxytocin in the brain – dancing can also increase dopamine levels

Singing

singing is another way to get that oxytocin fix

Taking long, hot baths and showers

hot water relieves muscle tension, puts you in a better mood, and minimizes cold and flu symptoms

Petting an animal

spending some time with your favorite four-legged friend cuts down on feelings of loneliness and depression

Using a weighted blanket

weighted blankets offer deep pressure stimulation which helps relax the nervous system - they’re great for calming anxiety, too, because the weight of the blanket helps release those feel-good chemicals

Using a warm blanket

just like swaddling a baby a warm blanket can invoke feelings of security and comfort helping to calm your nerves

Sleeping with a body pillow

a body pillow mimics what it feels like to hug or cuddle with another person and sleeping with one can help to reduce stress and aid the body in releasing oxytocin – as a bonus body pillows can create a more comfortable sleep by supporting the back and shoulders

Listening to ASMR

certain sounds, such as whispering or brushing hair, can invoke sense memories and stimulate the part of the brain associated with touch and connection

In addition to these strategies there are also several self-soothing techniques you can use to help with feeling touch starved:

Forearm stroke

Remove any bracelets, rings, watches, etc. Put your right arm next to your body and turn your right palm up, fingers together. Bring your arm up until your forearm and upper arm are at a 45-degree angle. Take your left hand and touch the fingertips of your right hand. Slowly and gently run your fingertips down your left fingers, palm, wrist and inside of the forearm, stopping at the inner elbow. Repeat 10 times.

Adult swaddling

Get out a blanket and put the long edge behind your neck. Drape the blanket over your shoulders. Gather a good handful of the blanket in each hand until you feel it tightening around your shoulders, and then cross your arms to pull it tighter around your upper arms and back. Hold for 30-60 seconds, and breathe.

Self-massage

Lie on your bed on your back naked, with a towel underneath you. Take a bit of lotion, cream, or oil in your left hand, and begin applying it in long, slow strokes to your right arm. Allow your hand to glide over the surface of your skin instead of focusing on absorption. Move on to your chest and torso, starting from your chin and your neck, using the same long strokes. Switch hands, and have the right hand do the left arm, and then do your legs and your feet. Start with five minutes and work your way up to 10 minutes.

Skin stimulation

Take a long-handled, soft-bristle brush and firmly run it back and forth across your arms, legs, torso, back, sides and chest prior to going to bed. The stimulation to your skin can help you sleep better. You can also do something similar for your scalp by brushing your hair 100 times.

Vagus nerve stimulation

You can stimulate the vagus nerve from the outside of the body by stroking the sides of your neck. Start behind your earlobe, and move your fingers down to your collarbone. Repeat until you feel your breath deepen, jaw relax and your mouth falls open a bit. You can also stimulate the vagus nerve by massaging or rubbing your feet.

Pressure points

Using your index finger and thumb, press the web of your other hand for five seconds. This relieves tension in your shoulders, and using your index finger or thumb and firmly rubbing on the temple of your face in a circular motion will relieve sinus pain and help you feel relaxed.

Sense memory

Close your eyes, and recall an amazing hug you received. It could be from a parent, relative, or child, a stranger, friend, or lover. Zero in on the details: what color was their shirt? Did they smell like onions because you just finished eating sub sandwiches? Where were you? Once you have the details, shift your attention to your body, and focus on what this hug felt like. Allow yourself to linger on the feeling of being safe, loved, cared for, and seen by another person.

EFT tapping

Emotional freedom technique (EFT) is an alternative treatment for physical pain and emotional distress. It’s also referred to as tapping or psychological acupressure. People who use this technique believe tapping the body can create a balance in your energy system and treat pain. Though still being researched, EFT tapping has been used to treat people with anxiety and people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

I found this video that will guide you through the whole process (the meditation starts at 4:30 and lasts about 15 minutes - she also does a shorter meditation starting at 26:20 that lasts about 4 minuets): https://tappingdetective.com/videos

Sources:

https://www.healthline.com/health/touch-starved#definition

https://www.tmc.edu/news/2020/05/touch-starvation/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-ways-to-self-soothe-when-starved-for-touch/

https://www.thegoodtrade.com/features/managing-touch-deprivation

https://zora.medium.com/how-i-am-dealing-with-touch-starvation-829d7c091e8b

https://www.healthline.com/health/eft-tapping#:~:text=Emotional%20freedom%20technique%20(EFT)%20is,energy%20system%20and%20treat%20pain.

[smutfornerds]

Super Emergency // Kara x Reader

A/N: I reeeeally need to write more Kara smut oof. Enjoy my loves 💕💕

—

By now you were sure your downstairs neighbors hated you, the pacing you’d been doing the last hour was nearly constant. Only checking your phone stopped your feet moving - typing and walking meant running into things and stubbing your toes, which you’d just learned about twenty-five minutes ago. Kara had told you she’d be back at 8:30, and seeing as it was now 9:45, your racing heart was the force that controlled your fidgeting feet. You knew she was probably busy kicking someone’s ass or saving an innocent bystander from debris but it didn’t calm your nerves. As your foot landed and you turned to pace back towards your dresser again your TV screen caught your eye, and up popped a news story with a triumphant photo of your girlfriend mid-air and waving to a grateful crowd. The smile that eased over your face was proud and equally relieved. Immediately you flopped onto your bed and clicked the volume higher to hear the station sing her praises. “And just when the assailant was triggering the detonator, Supergirl’s laser eyes were scalding his hand and rendering it useless!” The voice of an overly excited child in broad-rimmed glasses chimed through the speakers and brought a giggle to your lips. Reaching for your phone again you finally texted her, sending an especially cryptic message about an ‘emergency, my apt, please hurry?’ You watched the small dots trickle across the screen as she began to type, but before a response hit your phone you heard a click on your balcony doors and in a second Kara was beside you. Her face was riddled with worry but seeing you perfectly fine and sitting perched at the end of your bed, hiding a smile, made her soften a bit.

“What’s this about an emergency?” She questioned gently, placing her hands on her suited hips in a true superhero pose. Your eyes trailed to her legs, the hint of skin between her skirt and her boots made your chest feel hot. Clearing your throat you inched closer to the edge of the bed sitting on your knees, batting your lashes over to the blonde. “There’s something very important only my super, incredible, gorgeous girlfriend can attend to..” You reached out to her, hands just a few inches away from her waist where she stood. A smirk curled over her face and she took the large step to close the space between you, letting you slink your arms around her torso avoiding the cape on her back. “I think someone enjoys the super aspect a bit more than she should..” Kara nuzzled her nose against yours playfully as her hands found the bend of your waist. A slight tint rose to your cheeks at the assumption, solely because she was right. The way the fabric hugged her figure, seeing her strength and the gentility she could posses all in one moment, not to mention how her skirt billowed as she’d fly and show her killer legs. The legs only you got to revel between, and that thought was what always sent you reeling. Giving a small shrug you leaned in to press a slow and gentle kiss to her lips. “And so what if I do?” Before she could speak you kissed her again, this time firmer and with just the slightest bit of heat behind it. You knew Kara could feel your every change of breath, your heart pumping faster. She was the definition of perceptive to say the least, so when you pressed against her and your body heat registered in her mind she couldn’t help the groan that trickled from her lips.

Breaking from you only to eye your loose pajamas she shook her head disapprovingly. “Yeah, no, these are gonna have to go..” She mumbled as she gently pushed you back into your bed, a giggle falling from you as you bounced against the pillows. Wasting no time you lifted your hips to cue Kara to remove your shorts, and the look she dawned seeing you were panty-less was priceless. In an impossible second she’d removed your top and you saw she was starting to strip from her suit, and you whined out. “No, no leave it on..?” You spoke barely above a whisper because you knew she’d hear you no matter the volume, and you couldn’t muster much more than that. Her brows shot up and her golden hair fell over her shoulder when she looked back to you. Catching the way you nibbled at your lower lip made the burning in her stomach hotter, and she was quickly back to the bed to hover her body over yours. The action brought a gasp from you which only made Kara’s smile widen. “What was that emergency that only your super girlfriend could fix?” Her eyes raked your figure and you could’ve sworn you saw her drooling, before she licked across her lips to wet them. “Allow me to show you..” You muttered, bringing a hand to the back of her neck.

With the smallest bit of pressure you motioned her down your body and she happily obliged, placing sweet kisses across your skin every few inches as she moved. “Mm.. here, babe?” She cooed up to you, stopping just close enough for her mouth to ghost against your inner thigh. A soft whine left you and you shook your head no, trying to push her head lower but she held her place solid. “Please, K—“ You stopped yourself, lips twitching up at the corners at your little idea. You let out another much needier whine, gaining Kara’s gaze to meet yours as you spoke. “Please, help me Supergirl.. no one can get me off like you.” Your words spilled from your lips to hit Kara’s ears like rushing water, which practically matched how wet the little quip had made the both of you. Without another thought she leaned into your center to kiss against your clit slowly, her tongue darting out to slick against your folds and force a breathless moan from your lips. Her strong arms snaked up your thighs to wrap around them, angling your body so she could better eat you. The mewls of pleasure that left you were like a constant stream, only pausing for deep breaths or gasps from her movements. Her tongue found your clit again, twirling around it but never hitting directly just to tease you. Admittedly the action allowed you to catch your breath, one of your hands finding her hair to brush it back and hold it in your grip. Instead of giving in to her teasing she moved back to prodding your entrance with her tongue, burying herself even deeper between your legs to get as much of you as she could. Another loud and low groan left you at the feeling of her engulfing you so skillfully, and your legs began to twitch against her hold.

Kara let a small hum reverberate out against you and it caused you to gasp again, back arching ever so slightly into her. Noticing the way your body reacted to her touch she brought her tongue swiftly back to your clit now, instead of teasing however she immediately went to hard flicks against the throbbing bundle of nerves. The sharp cry that radiated through the room filled her with confidence and she kept her movements up, increasing the pressure and eliciting screeching cries from you as she did so. Relentlessly she stayed in place, tongue never wavering from the targeting movements to your clit. Your legs shook and it felt as if every muscle in your lower body tensed. The hand wound in her hair tugged involuntary but lord knows it didn’t bother her, it only fueled her to continue. Knowing you were seconds away she began circling tightly against your nub and it unraveled you instantly. A loud and breathless cry shook through you as your body curled into Kara. The hands on your thighs moved to hold your waist and back in place, so she could bury herself into you again and lick up every drop of your release as she hummed in appreciation at the delicious taste. Every few laps her tongue would flick your throbbing clit again and your leg would twitch, and when she was finished she purposefully moved back to it to flick skillfully against it for a few more moments. Hearing the helpless whimpers you let out and the way your body shook all over again on contact made Kara giggle, and give up her efforts for round two just yet.

Instead she left sticky kisses across your body until reaching your bare chest, watching it heave as you filled your lungs the best you could. Her eyes glazed over and she blew the tiniest bit of freezing air to your nipples, smirking as they hardened for more reasons than the temperature. Her mouth enveloped one as her fingers moved to the other, her tongue and pads of her fingers rolling simultaneously against the buds. Your eyes fluttered closed at the feeling, your hips involuntary twitching again at the sensation of wetness returning between your still-shaky legs. Just as she rolled your skin between her pinched fingers, you’d opened your mouth to speak but only a startled moan escaped. Above you Kara laughed heartily, finally moving her lips across and up to your collarbone, to leave gentle kisses to your skin. “You were saying?” She mumbled into your neck, and you smiled at the warmth of her breath. “I was going to say, thank you, Supergirl.” You teased in a playful tone, getting her to pull back to grin down at you. “Oh it was my pleasure, miss.” She quipped back, but narrowed her eyes at the way you beamed at her. “Oh no no, that’s next.” You finished the statement with an abrupt and skin-melting kiss to her lips.

As if on cue she rolled onto her back, and you dashed between her legs and under her skirt. The small gasp she emitted made your face light up, and you brought a hand up to push the thick fabric of her suit to the side, exposing her dripping self to you finally. Audibly you groaned at the sight, unable to resist yourself in order to taunt her, pushing her thighs apart to fit your head between them. Her juices hit your tongue and even that made you moan against her, and she matched it after with a small one of her own. Immediately you began lapping at her wetness, finding her clit to tease her with broad circles the way she had you. Kara whined above you, and unlike your girlfriend you liked to give in to the little begging noises she released. Instead of following her previous actions, you brought your hand up to her entrance and pushed your middle an ring fingers into her with surprising ease, her arousal from pleasing you much more prevalent now. The moan that left her pink lips was like a beautiful song to you, and your lips moved back to her clit again to elicit as many of them as you could. Your fingers started at a slow pace but quickly she was whining and whimpering for more friction. Your tongue zig-zagged across her clit rapidly as your fingers quickened pace, pumping harder and curling into her with each motion. Kara’s hands gripped harshly to your sheets and you heard them ripping, but couldn’t care less at the sight of her writhing in full costume before you. Truly giving her the gratitude and thanks she deserved for how she risks her life daily, saves millions of lives with this body that you had shaking your entire bed frame.

Barely pulling your mouth away you whispered to her knowing she’d hear every little syllable. “Cum for me, Supergirl..” You drawled her hero name slowly as your fingers curled against her inner walls, and she gasped for any sort of air to her lungs when your lips retreated back to her clit in harsh flicks. Her back arched high off the mattress and she shredded your sheets between her fingernails as she came, even the slightest bit squirting your hand and wrist as she rolled her hips up into your touch. A satisfied groan left her as she settled back onto the bed, and you happily copied the way she cleaned you up with your tongue teasing her clit every other lick. When you sat up and her eyes hit you again, you made sure to lock yours to hers as you sucked your fingers clean. As you slowly pulled them from your mouth you let your eyes flutter closed, and heard Kara’s shuttered sigh watching you trail your glistening fingers down your chest. Before you could open your eyes she was kissing you, slowly and lovingly and longingly, in a way she never had before; and Kara has kissed you a lot. This one held a different kind of passion though. Pulling back she cradled your face in her ridiculously strong hands with such tenderness that your heart nearly melted. Her deep eyes stared into yours and she sighed happily though her nose. “I love you so much.” She stated softly before continuing. “Thank you for letting me be the truest, fullest version of myself.” Her smile filled her features, crinkling her eyes and softening the wrinkles between her brows. Without a word you kissed her again, slowly and as lovingly as you possibly could. “I love you so much Kara. It doesn’t matter if you’re Danvers or Zor-El.” You placed a hand over the emblem on her chest, your fingertips barely feeling her heartbeat through her suit. “I just love you for you.” You shrugged nonchalantly because truly to you loving Kara came so easily. How anyone could be burdened with getting to love such an incredible woman was beyond you. Her smile widened as she chuckled. Wrapping your arms around her you squeezed her tightly to you, peppering her face with kisses and getting her to giggle. “Maybe get changed and we could go get dinner, yeah?” Again you pecked her nose and she scrunched it up adorably at you, bringing a bright smile to your face. “Or I could go pick up food and fly right back?” She asked while running a slow hand through your hair. You hummed happily at the contact but shook your head, hand pointing her the Kryptonian’s skirt, more specifically the streaky line of white that had dropped onto it. “No baby, you gotta change and wash this.” Her face glowed red and you couldn’t help but burst into laughter, and she covered her face with her hands as she fell into the same fit.

[gabriellakirtonblog]

Knee Pain: Exercises and Stretches that Actually Work

Knee pain plays cruel tricks on your clients. If they enjoy exercise, it punishes them for trying to stay active. If they hate exercise, it gives them an excuse not to move more. A client who wants to lose weight knows the extra pounds are contributing to his knee pain, but the knee pain makes it harder to do the physical activity he needs.

And this is the cruelest of them all: Following the wrong workout program when you have bad knees will absolutely make them worse.

So let’s talk about knee pain: what causes it, how to avoid making it worse, and, most important, the exercises and stretches to help your clients feel better and move more.

* Why knee pain happens

* What if a movement hurts your knees?

* The best exercises for knee pain

Step 1: Soft-tissue work

Step 2: Ankle mobility drills

Step 3: Hip-dominant exercises

Step 4: Deloaded knee-dominant exercises

* Final thoughts

Why knee pain happens

I could write an entire article about the causes of knee pain. So to narrow it down, we’ll focus on chronic knee pain.

If your client’s knee pain is related to a specific injury—a strained ligament, torn meniscus, or damage to the kneecap itself—I wouldn’t use any of these strategies unless the client has been evaluated by a professional, and the doctor or physical therapist recommended them for rehab.

Chronic knee pain usually begins with wear and tear, which could be linked to any or all of these:

· Age

· Weight

· Arthritis

· Poor running or lifting mechanics

· Poor or unbalanced muscle strength

· Lack of mobility in the ankle joints

· Old injuries

But before you can address these issues, you have to avoid making the pain worse.

READ ALSO: What Are the Rules for Training Older Clients?

What if a movement hurts your knees?

Your client’s first goal is to reduce or eliminate anything that triggers knee pain. In other words, if it hurts, stop doing it.

Easy enough if we’re talking about a specific exercise, like squats or lunges. Or if the client is a runner whose running clearly makes the pain worse.

But what if the pain occurs when walking, climbing stairs, or getting up and down from a chair? You need to ask your client questions like these.

“When do you feel knee pain?”

· Morning: If your client’s knees are worst in the morning, but get better once she starts moving, it’s typically because of arthritis. Have your client try some knee extensions upon waking, while sitting on the edge of the bed. That should help her feel better faster.

· Midday: My guess would be that the pain is work-related—too much sitting or repetitive movement. You’ll need more information before you can figure out a way to change things up.

· Evening: This is usually a combination of poor muscle strength and poor movement patterns, putting unnecessary stress on the knee joints. You can address all of it with the exercises and stretches you’ll see in a moment.

· Going up stairs: I know it sounds ridiculous to talk about technique—who doesn’t know how to walk up stairs?—but you’d be amazed how much time I’ve spent teaching people how to do it properly. In almost every case, the pain goes away when we alter their technique.

· After sitting for a while: It’s almost always ergonomics—where they sit and how they sit. First I’ll try to improve their posture. If that doesn’t help, I’ll look at the work station and see if they can change the setup.

· After standing for a while: Start with footwear. Shoes without arch support, for example, make it easier for someone’s ankles to roll inward, with the knees following their lead. (I’ll explain in more detail in the next section.) Standing on a hard surface can also make the knees feel like they’ve been hit by hammers.

“Where do you feel knee pain?”

· Inside (medial): It could be a sign of structural damage to the meniscus or a ligament, either of which should be diagnosed by a clinician. Or it could be a problem with the kneecap’s position. Tightness in the iliotibial band, the thick connective tissue on the outside of the leg, can pull the kneecap outward, putting stress on the structures designed to protect the medial side.

· Outside (lateral): It’s often a sign of iliotibial band syndrome, which is different from the tightness I just described. I see it a lot with runners and cyclists. Their repetitive knee flexion and extension causes the IT band to rub against the lateral condyle, the part of the femur that widens to form the knee joint.

· Over the kneecap: Most of the time, it’s caused by a tight patellar tendon, weak quadriceps, faulty movement mechanics, or some combination. All the strategies below should help.

· Behind the kneecap: The culprit could be bursitis (inflammation of one of the dozen or so fluid-filled sacs within the knee joint) or chondromalacia patella (arthritis on the back of the kneecap). In the latter case, the smooth cartilage on the back of the bone wears away, and instead of gliding over the femur, it starts to drag. It’s like rubbing two pieces of sandpaper together.

The best exercises for bad knees

Step 1: Soft-tissue work

The knee is kind of like Hodor: Even though it’s the body’s largest joint, it’s often picked on by smaller joints like the hip and ankle.

I’ll address the ankle in more detail below. First, though, you need to work out the kinks in three typically problematic areas for clients who have knee pain: calves, quads, and IT band.

One big note about foam rolling:

With most exercises, we tell our clients to stop if they feel pain. But with soft-tissue mobilization, the more it hurts, the more they need to do it. They’ll sometimes see stars when they hit a sensitive spot. Again, that’s a sign they need to do more, not less.

You’ll also see in the videos below that I like to foam roll one leg at a time. You can’t hit the entire muscle you’re targeting if you work both simultaneously.

Calf

The gastrocnemius, the larger calf muscle, crosses the knee joint, so it has some impact on knee motion. Have the client rotate her leg to work over the entire muscle—not just the meaty part in the middle, but also the sides, which is where you’re most likely to find those sensitive spots. When she hits one, have her focus on it, even though it hurts.

Quads

Again, rotate the leg to hit all parts of the muscle while stopping to work on any painful spots. Keep in mind that a client who’s rolling his quads for the first time may be sensitive everywhere.

Stay above the knee joint, and roll as far up the thigh as possible.

IT band

Now we get to the dreaded iliotibial band. When it’s tight, the IT band can prevent the kneecap from tracking properly, and that can create pain on the inside or outside of the knee.

Even though the client is rolling on the outside part of the leg, he’ll still need to rotate a little to find the problem spots. (Although, like the quads, the entire IT band can light up the first few times a client rolls on it.) Rolling forward a bit onto the quad can help separate the quad and IT band, which need to work independently but can sometimes get “stuck” to each other.

The range of motion here is important: You don’t want the client to roll over his knee or the greater trochanter, the bone on the outside of the leg at about groin level. There’s no benefit to putting pressure on it, and if the client has any amount of hip bursitis, it’ll be the wrong kind of painful.

Step 2: Ankle mobility drills

“Dorsiflexion” is one of those terms you probably stumbled on the first time you saw it in a textbook. The way it’s normally illustrated is like this, with the heel on the ground and the toes lifted up toward the shin:

   But functionally, dorsiflexion is most often achieved with the toes on the ground and the lower leg moving forward over the ankle and foot while running and walking. And it’s the loss of this type of dorsiflexion that causes knee problems.

It typically happens one of two ways: prolonged inactivity, or too much activity with flawed movement patterns.

When the shin doesn’t move forward over the ankle, it shifts inward. This ankle eversion causes the arch to flatten and the knee to go into valgus, collapsing in toward the other knee.

If you do this long enough—and it takes some time before you start to feel pain (usually on the medial part of the knee joint)—your brain starts to treat ankle eversion and knee valgus as your normal movement pattern. At that point, even if you correct your ankle mobility, your knee and ankle will still collapse inward.

Improving your walking and running mechanics is beyond our scope here. So let’s focus on ankle mobility.

Step 3: Hip-dominant exercises

When the glutes and other hip muscles are weak, the hip doesn’t stabilize properly. That allows the femur to adduct, which produces knee valgus—the same motion you see when the ankle is limited. So if your client has glute weakness and ankle mobility issues, your work is cut out for you.

The four exercises I show here—glute bridge from a box, band walk, kettlebell deadlift from a box, and Romanian deadlift—are some of my favorites. But we all know many others that could work just as well, if not better, with individual clients.

Use your own judgment on sets and reps. How you do these exercises very much matters. Even when your clients can do them pain-free, you still need to focus on motor control.

That’s especially true of the deadlift variations, on which you probably want to use lower reps.

The band walk tends to be self-limiting, in that you’ll be able to see when fatigue sets in and the client’s form breaks down. And with glute bridges, you can typically do high-rep sets without any problems.

READ ALSO: Training the Hip Hinge

Glute bridge from a box

Use a box or bench that’s about 12 to 14 inches high, and make sure your client sets up with his shoulder blades at the edge of the box.

Get your client to finish the movement in table-top position, with his torso and thighs parallel to the floor. Squeeze the glutes hard at the top of the movement, and then control the descent. The glutes may or may not touch the floor between reps. It’s fine either way, as long as the glutes fully contract at the top, without any of the work shifting to the quads or hamstrings.

READ ALSO: How to Train Clients Who Have Back Pain

Band walk

Most of the time, when you do band walks with your clients, you coach them not to lean to the side. You want the torso to stay perpendicular to the floor and the client to remain in an athletic position.

These are different. Starting with the feet about hip-width apart, have the client abduct her left leg while leaning to the right and squeezing the right glute. Don’t let her swing the leg out or fall over onto the lead leg; make it a controlled movement out and back.

As you can see in the video, you’re traveling just a few inches on each step. The lead leg should return most of the way to the starting position by the time it lands.

Both hips will fatigue, so you probably want to let your client rest briefly before switching sides.

Kettlebell deadlift from a box

Make sure the kettlebell touches the box in the bottom position, and have your client pause there briefly, but don’t let her relax. The key to this exercise is to maintain total-body tension throughout the movement.

Romanian deadlift

The RDL is, essentially, the top half of the deadlift. But because you start from the top rather than the bottom, the muscle-coordination strategy will be a little different from the previous exercise.

Make sure the movement comes from the hips. You want the client to start with a slight knee bend, and maintain that same knee bend throughout the range of motion.

READ ALSO: Troubleshooting the Deadlift

Step 4: Deloaded knee-dominant exercises

When your client consistently reports little to no knee pain in her everyday life, it’s time to put knee-dominant movements like squats and lunges back into the program.

Your best strategy is to deload the exercises by using bands or pulleys for assistance. That puts less demand on the muscles and joints and gives you a chance to fix movement impairments like ankle eversion and knee valgus.

I typically have my clients do just two to six reps per set at first, using as much or as little assistance as the client needs. The goal isn’t to get a great leg pump; it’s to do each exercise pain-free and with good form.

If a client normally feels knee pain when he does squats or lunges, but none when he deloads the movements, it suggests the pain results from muscle weakness or mechanical issues, rather than a problem with the knee itself.

Practice it on your own a few times before trying it with a client; that way you’ll get a sense of how much assistance a client might need to descend slowly and pull up from the bottom position, all without pain.

READ ALSO: Why People Must Squat Differently

Deloaded squat

You can do this with a cable machine, as shown, or with a band, as I show here.

Deloaded lunge

Again, you can try this with a cable or band.

Final thoughts

The longer a client has had chronic knee pain, the more muscle, movement, and lifestyle issues you’ll have to confront.

That’s why patience is the final part of the puzzle.

Sometimes you can get fast results by fixing a flawed movement pattern. Sometimes you get steady progress by helping a client build strength in key muscles while learning how to squat or lunge properly. And sometimes it’s a long, frustrating process in which weeks of training can be undone when the client slips in the shower or stumbles down a step.

You can’t change what the client did in the past. But with these strategies, you can help the client achieve a pain-free future.

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Knee Pain: Exercises and Stretches that Actually Work published first on https://onezeroonesarms.tumblr.com/

[vuse-pod]

Be My Mistake - Ch 1

Ben Hardy!Roger Taylor x Lucy Boynton!Mary Austin (the fictional characters from the movie) 

write the crack ships u want to see in the world!!

*SMUT WARNING* 

Roger hasn’t met Dominique (yet?) in this timeline, we don’t condone infidelity in this house 

A few months after her and Freddie’s separation, Mary is still feeling raw about it. So, she meets up with a good friend to lift her spirits. (Just a slew of bad decisions i don’t even know man)

early 1977, at a pub somewhere in London

Mary stared into her drink blankly as she waited at the pub, ill thoughts of Freddie firing like bullets through her mind: Why did I leave? Did he mean any it? I know he did.. He’s never lied to me, has he? Was he ever unfaithful while on tour in America? Is that how he discovered his sexuality? Was I ever enough?

“It’s been months,” she silently chided herself for holding onto these feelings for so long. Her and Freddie had remained in contact even after the separation, a fact that both validated and confused Mary. The thoughts and questions continued to cloud her mind as her emotions began to spiral--

“Mary!” A deep, masculine voice exclaimed, abruptly bringing Mary out of her stupor and causing her head to shoot up. Roger Taylor, in all his blonde glory, waving and making his way over to her from the pub’s entrance.

“Hey Roger!” Mary smiled back. She had been expecting him, as they had made plans to catch up before Queen left for their Day At the Races Tour. She wasn’t going to allow her inner emotional turmoil dampen precious time with a dear friend, and she could manage pushing aside her true feelings for an evening. “I see you’ve started without me,” Roger smirked and nodded towards the glass in front of Mary.

“I have to prepare, knowing how you get once you get started on a topic,” she replied with a wicked grin.

“Oi! Right where it hurts, Austin,” Roger nudged her playfully with his elbow before ordering a drink.

“Are you excited for the tour in a few weeks? I heard you’re not going to Asia for this one.”

“Yeah, it’s just America and Europe this time around. Love to go back to Japan though. It was absolutely gorgeous last year.”

Mary stared at Roger in wonderment. “I can’t even imagine, I’ve always wanted to visit Japan.”

“Enough about me and the bums I work with,” Roger changed the subject, extracting a brief laugh out of both of them. “How are you? How have things been holding up in the world of Mary Austin?”

Oh no, she thought to herself. Should she spill? How much should she share? She steeled herself for whatever was about to stumble out of her mouth. “I’m...alright. You know, it’s been a little difficult since Freddie but I’m managing. Staying in touch with Freddie and Queen is a good thing, I feel. You boys are wonderful.” She was impressed with her answer, not exactly a lie but not exactly a truth (it’s been more than a little difficult). Roger wasn’t really the “tell all our deepest darkest emotions” type, but Mary knew she could count on him to be an understanding and deeply loyal friend when called upon. And right now what she needed was a distraction. “Other than that all is well! Just work and usual routine.”

Roger replied with a nod and an understanding smile. Then, almost like he read Mary’s mind, said, “Another round?”

“Absolutely.”

Some time plus a few drinks later

“Tell me, Rog,” Mary was almost slurring her words now and was slightly squinting at the blonde man next to her, “What’s the deal with you and--and  the car?”

Roger let out a boyish giggle. “Nonononono, Mary, LISTen,” he managed to say before Mary burst into laughter, taking him along with her. He was as drunk as she was, and the cloud of doubt in Mary’s head about Freddie had been replaced with a cloud of alcohol and giddiness. Noticing the way Roger’s big blue eyes crinkled when he laughed, Mary saw how handsome he really was. She noticed his large smile, great physique, how he looked at her like she had him hanging on every word. No wonder he was always surrounded by groupies with a girlfriend every other week. Roger Taylor was a rock star, with drum skills and a voice to match, and he knew it. His boyish charm had helped him worm his way into the hearts of many. These thoughts had the potential to be dangerous. Mary wondered what he was thinking. What does he notice about her?

“Roger I think, I think we might be drunk” Mary said through giggles. She was being uncharacteristically giggly, no doubt because of the alcohol. Then again, so was Roger.

“I am Not Fucking drunk!” He said, pointing at her and letting out a snort. Mary cocked her head to the side.

“Really then?! Tell the time.”

“Right, where’s the clock.”

“Shit, Rog, I don’t know!” More laughter. Looking around, Mary spotted the clock and pointed to it. “There it is. You can tell the time if you’re not fucking drunk.” Roger turned and faced the clock near them on the wall. He squinted, pointed at it, and said loudly “I am NOT Fucking Drunk!”

Mary almost fell off her stool from laughing so hard. She hadn’t laughed this hard in months, and it felt good to be carefree again. If she weren’t drunk she would have noticed that she snorted. If she weren’t drunk she would have noticed how she hadn’t thought about Freddie in hours.

“Right then lovebirds, pub’s bout to close. Time to pay and wrap it up,” The gruff voice of the bartender said from behind the counter. Roger pulled out his wallet and winked at Mary. Ignoring the flutter in her chest, she wiggled her eyebrows up and down amusingly in response. “I guess I owe you now, Rog.”

“Mary Austin, you are now officially in my debt,” he expressed with a flourish before walking away to pay the tab (nearly stumbling over his own feet). Band boys.

Roger finished paying, somehow avoiding the chairs and tables of the pub as he sashayed back to Mary. “You take a cab?” He asked.

“Yeah, you?”

“Naaahh, driver. You know, famous bloke and all that.” Another round of giggles came from the pair.

“It’s so late, Roger. Let’s just go outside and see who comes by to pick us up first.” Grinning, Roger holds out his elbow for Mary to grasp; she takes it enthusiastically and they stumble out of the pub together, all laughs and smiles.

They manage to hail a cab and fall over each other getting in, giggling and still quite drunk. “Where to?” Says the driver, sounding rather bored. Mary and Roger start speaking simultaneously before erupting again into laughter. After calming down, Roger asks, “Where to, Mary?”

“We can go to my place, I think it’s closer and the night’s still young!” She responded, feeling like the university student without a care in the world she was not-so long ago.

“Sounds like a plan,” Roger said smiling, looking into her eyes with those characteristic baby blues. “These are dangerous grounds, Mary Austin. That’s your ex-fiance's best friend,” she would have thought to herself if she were sober. Would have.

Opening the door to her apartment and turning on the light with Roger close on her heels, she headed to the liquor cabinet and pulled out her last bottle of white wine. Roger gasped and walked toward the bottle. “My favourite!”

“One more round before calling it quits for the night?” Mary asks mischievously.

Now it was Roger’s turn for eyebrow wiggling, causing yet another round of giggles. Mary went to the kitchen to get the wine glasses, feeling Roger’s eyes on her back. She liked that. Why did she like that? She decided she was feeling brave.

She walked back with the glasses and corkscrew, eyeing him flirtatiously and only stumbling once. He gave her his best shit-eating grin while placing the bottle on the table. For some reason, Mary couldn’t seem to break eye contact. She didn’t want to break eye contact. Silently, Mary held out the corkscrew and Roger, now serious, took it from her, brushing his larger, rough, calloused hands over her smaller, soft ones. His touch left a tingle on her hand. She blamed it on the alcohol. Almost as soon as the moment began, it ended. Roger turned around to open the bottle and the drunken giggles began again. “What are the chances you have MY favourite wine, of all things?!” Roger asked as the cork made its signature pop.

   “Fate? Chance? Maybe I’m secretly a groupie that knows absolutely everything about you! Shhh!” Mary held a finger to her lips. “Don’t tell!”

“Hey! No need to bring up Crystal like that, she was lovely!”

“You mean Cheryl?”

“I-unno,” he shrugged. They began to sip the wine as their conversation continued. They talked about everything and nothing all at once, throwing around incredulous ideas and laughing like teenagers. With each sip the line of propriety, and consequently sensibility, faded more and more. Talking turned to flirting, and the way Roger hung on to her every word sent a warmth spreading in her belly. Mary hadn’t felt this wicked in her life.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re an incredibly beautiful man, Roger Taylor?” Mary suddenly blurted out. At this point she didn’t care about consequences. Mary was here now, and Roger was right by her side. He distracted her from the hurt in her heart. Roger smiled and narrowed his eyes slightly at her.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re an incredibly beautiful woman, Mary Austin?”

Mary smiled slyly and looked downward. She guessed her thoughts at the pub weren’t completely one-sided. She then raised her eyes to meet Roger’s, which were still trained on her face. After a few moments of intense silence, Mary placed her hand on his from across the table and whispered, “My room is down the hall.” Completely in sync, they rose from their chairs and moved towards each other like two magnets. Breathing heavily, their faces inched closer and closer together, like an avalanche waiting for a trigger. They come even closer, lips now lightly brushing. They stay in this moment of suspension for a few agonizing seconds until Mary gives in to her lust and presses her lips against his. Almost instantly, the drummer returns the kiss with a hungry passion she hadn’t experienced in a very long while. She brings her right hand to his cheek as they deepen the kiss while he puts his own hand in the swell of her back.

They break apart for just a moment to look at each other through heavy-lidded eyes, Mary’s hand still on Roger’s cheek. Her thumb lightly brushed down his lip. “I have extra bed space, in case you need a place to crash.. If you want?” She whispers breathily, almost soundlessly. Roger brushed his lips against her own and whispers in reply, “It’d be impractical for me to go home this late, don’t you think?”

“Quite impractical.”

They kiss again, this time hungrier than the last, moving together towards Mary’s room. Roger places his hands under the curve of her ass, and she jumps up and wraps her legs around his waist in response, her dress bunching around her thighs. They stumble and knock into things, but they just laugh into the kisses as they make their way. They find Mary’s bed, and Roger lays her down. He trails kisses down her jawline and neck, reaching her chest. He stands up for a moment to remove his shirt and pants, movements almost frantic. Seeing Roger’s fit form towering over her, wanting her as much as she wanted him, made the warmth that spread over Mary’s lower belly earlier move towards her pubic area. That was definitely not from the alcohol. Sitting up, Mary quickly removed the dress from her chest area, leaving her breasts exposed and heaving. Looking at each other hungrily, Roger goes back in for a kiss, his hands roaming along Mary’s torso. His hands reach where her dress is pooled around her waist. “Want me to take this off you?” He whispers while kissing her neck.

“Yes, Roger. Oh, God yes.”

Mary, now completely naked, shifted farther back onto the bed to give Roger room to join her. He positioned himself on top of her, trailing his tongue and kisses down her chest and around her breasts. She could feel her pussy become wet with every touch, every kiss. She looked down onto the drummer, now focused on her stomach. One of his hands became entwined with hers while the other roamed her body. At this point, Mary was aching with desire, and bucked her hips as Roger’s mouth traveled down her pubic bone towards her vagina. “Rog, please,” Mary breathed. He looked up at her and smirked. Untangling his hand from hers, Roger suddenly grabbed her thighs and pulled her towards himself. This excited Mary more than she’d admit. He put a warm kiss on her inner thigh before trailing his lips over her labia, Mary’s breath hitching when he brushed past her clit. He dove in, stroking his tongue up and down her pussy, occasionally circling her clit. As he savored her sweet taste, Mary was oblivious to the world. “Oh fuck, Roger,” she would moan occasionally while grinding on his tongue. This rhythm continued until she got close to the edge, when Roger suddenly stopped. Mary gave a slight groan in protest; she was dripping wet and moments away from satisfaction. Roger stood up, moving towards his pants on the floor to take a condom out of the pocket. Mary watched him take off his underwear and move back towards her. Roger was unsurprisingly well-endowed, and the thought of him inside her made Mary more frantic with desire. She sat up as he moved towards her, a wicked gleam in both their eyes. They put the condom on then he kissed her deeply, his mouth still tasting of her. “Is this alright?” Roger asked. Mary nodded her head and smiled into his mouth, muttering a yes.

“However,” she said, breaking the kiss and putting an index finger on his collarbone, “Let’s mix things up.” Mary took Roger by the shoulder and maneuvered so that now he was the one laying on the bed, with her straddling his hips. She leaned forward for another kiss, then sat up and slowly lowered herself onto him. He grasped her hips as they found a rhythm. Grinding on his dick, Mary could see Roger go wild in full view, all because of her. She was powerful, in control. She brought a hand to her clitoris as she kept grinding and gauging Roger’s face. She could tell he was getting close; so was she. She knew she had him wrapped around her finger when all Roger could manage was a breathy “fuck, Mary.” Their breathing grew heavier as they reached a climax: Mary first, her orgasm rocking through her body like a thousand fireworks going off. Roger finished a few seconds later, letting out a groan of pleasure. Sex with Freddie was amazing, but Mary had never experienced anything like this before.

Mary dismounted Roger, leaning forward to kiss him. Breaking the kiss, their faces still inches apart, they began to laugh. It was a light, “look where we are now” kind of laugh. They could tell they were sobering up, but didn’t care enough to feel guilty just yet. Mary pressed her forehead against Roger’s chest in a weak attempt to muffle her laughter; he took her in his arms in an all-enveloping hug. “I’d say you’re no longer in my debt,” said Roger, causing another round of giddy laughter. They laid in this position for a while, just holding each other, seemingly oblivious to what they had just done. If they were in love or completely sober, they would make sure to cherish this moment. If. Eventually the laughter turned into silence as they fell asleep.

10:30 the next morning 

Mary suddenly came to. With newfound consciousness came a massive headache. “Oh my god,” she groaned quietly, pressing her palms to her eyes, “I need to pee.” Totally missing the sleeping form laying next to her, she got up groggily and started down the hall towards the loo. Her nakedness came as no surprise to her, as she often slept without clothes since meeting Freddie. After doing her business, Mary made her way to the sink. She washed her hands and looked into the mirror, studying her reflection. Her lips were slightly swollen, and Mary felt incredibly vulnerable and sensitive under the gaze of her own judgment. Last night’s events were a blur. She remembered meeting Roger and getting drunk with him, but anything after getting back to her apartment was a fog. She couldn’t seem to piece together how she had gotten naked, or how her body felt slightly raw - in a good way. She grabbed a conveniently-placed blue silk robe that was hanging on the door and slipped it on, cinching the matching belt around her waist. Mary rinsed her face with cool, clear water from the sink, relishing the way the chill brought her back to life. She pat herself dry and began to rummage through her medicine cabinet, looking for anything to help with her hangover.

Walking out of the bathroom, Mary’s usual internal dialogue greeted her like an old friend, “I think I’ll make coffee.. I need it after this headache. What to do, though? My head hurts too much to watch the telly. I should stop by my room to see if I forgot anything.” Mary made her way back to her bedroom, yawning. Opening the door, her eyes immediately focused to the sleeping figure in her bed. Mary’s stomach dropped. Oh god, she thought. Who was this man? She didn’t remember meeting anyone else last night..It couldn’t be-- she would never.. Did he even come back to her apartment with her?

Mary tiptoed silently towards the mysterious lump underneath her blankets. As she peered over to try to see any identifying features, a mop of blonde hair popped up from under the covers, his handsome face crinkled and squinting from suddenly rousing. “Hmm? Whus going on?” Roger asked sleepily as he slowly came to. Mary just stared at him wide-eyed, brain blank of thoughts and words. She backed away slowly. How could either of them ever face Freddie again? The love of Freddie’s life spending the night with his best friend? The thought of it would make most people scoff, but that’s the tragedy of reality. Mary and Roger kept staring at each other in wide-eyed silence for the next minute, both of them piecing together what had happened the night before.

“Are you..?” Mary gestured to the rest of Roger’s body. He looked under the covers, his head then shooting up in shock to focus back on Mary. The drummer nodded solemnly.

“Did we..?” She asked again quietly. A brief glance to the used condom by the bed confirmed their suspicions.

“I think so.”

A few more moments of intense silence. Mary decided to take a chance. “Coffee?” she inquired. She gauged his reaction. Would he leave? She could see realization settle on his face as to what they had done. Denial, bargaining, acceptance. He breathed a heavy sigh and nodded his head.

“Yeah, that’d be great.”

“I’ll give you some privacy.”

Mary moved numbly towards the kitchen. She wasn’t sure how she felt. She had been single for months, she had the liberty to sleep with whomever she pleased. ..Did she? Freddie had been so good to her, and it was clear he still loved her very deeply. They were still so interconnected that this felt like a betrayal. As the memory of last night grew clearer in Mary’s mind, the lack of regret hit her hardest. Last night was the most fun she’d had in so long. The turmoil that was in her heart before Roger fatefully appeared at the pub had been replaced entirely, this turmoil somehow worse. Turning on the coffee machine, Mary’s thoughts shifted to Roger. Most of her confusion was entirely about the blonde drummer. Would she be as conflicted about the situation had Roger not been so connected to Freddie? Almost certainly not. God, she would give anything to read Roger’s mind right now. How did he feel? Was he ashamed? Guilty? Did he think about Freddie? These questions plagued Mary’s thoughts as she stared blankly at the hissing coffee machine, waiting for Roger to round the corner any minute.

“Hey,” Mary heard a sheepish male voice from behind her. Her breath hitched at the sound of it. Oh, how she loved it when he talked. Vocal chords smooth as silk, he could be crass and loud as well as soft and gentle. Not to mention his raspy singing was enough to drive anyone wild. What was she thinking?! This is Freddie’s best friend she was talking about! This was Freddie’s best friend that she had just spent the night with. Mary quietly chided herself for these thoughts and turned around to face Roger. Now fully clothed, the drummer looked slightly disheveled, albeit very endearing. He looked at Mary like a lost dog, and she felt for him. She realized they were in the same boat, and had to deal with the consequences of their actions together. She poured them both a cup of coffee. Handing Roger the mug with a small smile, they both went to sit at the kitchen table. The almost-empty bottle of wine and its glasses sat there, unmoved, serving as a grim reminder of last night’s indiscretion. Mary quickly cleared the table before taking a seat across Roger. They both breathed a sigh, awkwardly avoiding each other’s eyes for a few moments while sipping their coffee. The topic of Freddie felt to Mary like the elephant in the room, and the need to clear the air overcame her feelings of awkwardness.

“I don’t regret it,” Mary exclaimed suddenly. Roger’s eyes shot up to meet hers at the sudden admission. “I’m not going to pretend that I hated last night. It’s the most alive I’ve felt in months. But there will be consequences whether or not we tell Freddie, Roger.” The drummer’s eyes immediately fell again at the mention of his best friend. Mary felt relieved that she wasn’t alone in her worry.

“I would have rather you yelled and told me you wanted to throw me out the bloody window,” Roger replied with a light chuckle, meeting her eyes yet again. This took Mary by surprise and her heart dropped. What did he mean? But Roger continued, “Last night was great, Mary. But we were drunk. We can’t blame ourselves. Usually in situations like this, we’d go our separate ways and never speak again. But..things have changed, and we can’t exactly avoid each other.”

“Do you want us to avoid each other?”

Roger took a drink from the coffee mug. “No,” he admitted.

“Me either.”

Mary let out a mirthless chuckle while rubbing her eye with her hand. “You’re right though, Roger. It’d be easy to scream at each other and direct the blame. It’d be so easy to just laugh it off, claiming we don’t remember anything because of the alcohol but--”

“But we can’t do that, can we?”

Mary shook her head in response. After a moment of unwavering eye contact, Mary broke the palpable silence with barely a whisper: “What do you remember?”

“Everything,” Roger’s breathy reply sent a shockwave of emotion through Mary’s body. “It was foggy at first, but after seeing you, and all this,” he gestured around, “it came around.”

“Do you regret it?”

“...No.” Something had changed in Mary since the pub and the bedroom last night. The strikingly handsome man before her was no longer just Roger Taylor, Queen’s drummer and her and Freddie’s mutual friend. This was Roger, a man she shared such an intimate experience with. They might have been drunk, but the desire remained. They had bonded, and there was no denying things would be different between them for a very long time to come. The intense, dark look Roger gave her clued Mary into the fact he felt the same.

“It seems we’re in the same predicament,” Mary said with a sad smile.

“It seems we are indeed, Mary.”

Mary didn’t love Roger. Love didn’t even cross her mind as they studied each other. No, this was a purely selfish, raw emotion. It was dangerous and turbulent. The daily routine she had perfected since leaving Freddie had been shattered the moment she kissed the blonde drummer last night. It scared her how one drunken night could change her world so drastically. But Roger, here in front of her, was enough for now.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #175

“imagine living like a king someday, a single night without a ghost in the walls.”

Have you ever had a teacher hit on you? Not to my recollection. Have you ever seen your ex’s new partner? If so, what do you think of them? I don't know or care if he currently has one. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months? Done it twice now, it's not difficult if you're picky and serious with who you date. Does anybody know about your sex life other than your partners? Well my mom was somewhat aware of things that were happening. What was the last piece of candy you ate? Good question. I got my tongue re-pierced because of a bar length issue with swelling, and now this one is just shy of long enough to disable me from biting down entirely (they're snake eyes, so across the tip). I'm only just getting back into eating soft things very slowly unless I want pain, so candy's a no. I have to wait no less than three weeks to get a correctly-sized bar, and it's only been just over one aaaahhh. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted? No. Is your room painted or wallpapered? Painted. What is the best kind of pizza in your opinion? I'm an American I stan them meat lovers. Is there something that someone has done to you that you cannot forgive? No. Well actually idk, I still don't know for *sure* if I forgive him. Like I'm completely over it and it no longer affects me, but I could never ever ever ever look at him even remotely the same or even consider trusting him. I don't think that's supposed to happen when you forgive someone. Have you ever broken a plate/bowl? Accidentally by dropping. What is your favorite restaurant? Olive Garden. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? I don't think so. Do you know anyone who has a homosexual parent? No. What type of music could this world live without? Pure screamo (no, not as a carpet term for metal). Are any of your pets “overweight”? No. Who’s the last person you cried over? Does myself count? Did the house you grew up in have a fence? Yeah, but not all around. What’s your YouTube channel name? 0zzkat. Who of your FB friends has the cutest toddler(s)? Uhhhh idk. Anastasia's baby girl is pretty cute, I guess. Did you decorate pumpkins this year? No. :/ They were totally gone the day we were gonna get one (the day before Halloween so no, we weren't that surprised lmao). What’s the craziest color you’d dye your hair? More like what color WOULDN'T I dye it? What’s the coolest hobby one of your friends has? Uhhh. Idk. Name a video game you can play over and over again? Shadow of the Colossus. I've beaten it around 30 times. Would be more if I didn't lose the disc, buuut it's actually coming in the mail now! What is something that will make you laugh instantly? Don't show me that fucking Linkin Park "crawling in my crawl" worm video. Name a movie you wouldn’t watch solely based on its name? None come to mind. What’s your dearest souvenir? *shrugs* What was the last strong scent you smelled? Probably coffee bc of Mom. Have you ever been in an unconventional relationship (long distance, polyamorous, same gender, age gap, etc)? If so, what challenges did this relationship present, and were they worth overcoming? Long instance + same-sex simultaneously. Distance is fucking hard when you really want each other's company, especially for emotional support. Being same-sex makes me nervous due to potential violent homophobics, especiiiiaaaally living where I do. I do it regardless, but even just holding hands leaves me worrying some asshole is going to cause a problem. I know my sister's husband isn't at all fond of it either and I'm 99% sure he's why Sara's never met the kids. But anyway, all those things are absolutely worth it. Would you ever consider something like a poly relationship, assuming everyone involved was alright with it? What are some things you think you would or wouldn’t like about it? Absolutely not, because I strictly believe in the exclusiveness of love. What is the most unhealthy relationship (whether friendship or romantic) you’ve ever had? What made it so unhealthy? Do you still talk to each other? Colleen, probably. We are just about the antitheses of each other, yet we were "best friends." We disagreed too frequently, she was drama-ravenous, we kept leaving and coming back, etc. No, we don't talk now, and I refuse to ever do so again as friends. Have you ever been abusive in any way? Were you able to change or make amends, or, in general, what do you think people should do to make amends in that situation? No. I absolutely do not believe in "making amends" with your abuser. Keep them the fuck out of your life. Have you ever forgiven someone for being abusive or allowed someone toxic back into your life? Did this person change for the better or not? Toxic... you mean Colleen? Did it too many times, and no, she didn't. Do you feel like your age matches your emotional development? If not, what age level or maturity level do you feel best represents where you’re at? Part of me says no, another says yes. I guess it depends on the subject. What is one thing about your personality that embarrasses you, but you can’t seem to change it no matter how hard you try? Have other people called you out on this embarrassing thing? Being socially awkward as all hell, and yes. When was the last time you did something “meant” for children? Do you think it’s okay for adults to do these things (ie. watch cartoons, have stuffed animals, dress in cute clothing, etc), or do you think there’s an age beyond which it becomes unacceptable - and if so, why? I was playing Spyro just earlier today lmao. In almost all cases, no. I do believe that something like a full-grown adult playing pretend with dolls or something may be questionable, but even then there's not a real reason I can give you. What was the last thing to “trigger” you (as in, in a true mental health sense, I’m being serious here) and how did you cope with it? What kinds of things do you tend to find triggering? What do you do either avoid or face your triggers? Something PTSD-related, but I can't remember exactly what it was, I guess because I got past it pretty quickly. There are certain songs I should avoid, I canNOT look at the medicine I ODed on, I don't like seeing or being near large knives at all... If you’re diagnosed with anything, do you feel that it accurately represents what you’re experiencing? All of them, yeah. What is a complaint you have about the mental health industry or about the type of treatment you’ve received from a mental health service? Have you ever had any particularly bad therapy experiences? I feel that too many people working in the field care far more about the pay than the people. I can't guarantee a professional truly cared about what I was dealing with until Holly Hill. I've had one particularly horrible psychiatrist that threw diagnoses and pills around like they were nothing (the most ridiculous being ADHD, which I in no way exhibited), and a long-time therapist I had was pretty bad, something I realized only after I started with my current one. She was strict about that "you've got an hour, you're staying an hour, you're leaving no later" shit, and we always ran out of things to talk about so I'd just be sitting there super uncomfortably and numerous times start crying because I felt so awkward, and she'd just take it as a sign that I wasn't telling her something. She drove "and how does that make you feel" and "what're you thinking of" into the goddamn ground. Yeesh, having been a mental health patient for so long, I could really write a novel here. When was the last time you realized you might be the source of a problem and NOT someone else? Hm, idk. I'm so uninvolved with others that that's a hard question to answer. What are some minor physical discomforts that really bug you (eyelash in your eye, a wedgie, rumpled socks, etc)? HAVING THE BOTTOMS OF YOUR PANTS GET WET. I hate chapped lips, too. Do you prefer vertical or horizontal stripes? Horizontal. Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? No. Are you ticklish? YEAH. Have you ever tried to make your own alcohol? No. If you were to join one of the armed forces, which would it be? I wouldn’t. Have you ever been in a submarine? No. Have you ever been in a hot tub or sauna? Only hot tubs. Do you believe there used to be dragons? No. What was your first alcoholic drink? A Mike's hard lemonade. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? Idk, I was a baby. What was your first detention for? Too many tardies. Did you ever have a treehouse as a kid? No. Have you ever been on radio? No. How long has your longest ever phone call been? A few hours. What is a meal you eat extremely often? Or do your meals & food choices vary a lot? Ummm I guess some kind of chicken is common? When was the last time you felt unable or unwilling to speak your mind to someone? Idk. What was the last thing you changed your mind about? Uhhhh how am I blanking, I change my mind on things every five minutes. Who was the last friend you saw, and what did you do together? Sara's both my girlfriend but also the only "friend" I ever hang with now even tho we live several states apart lmao. I was there two weeks, so we did an array of stuff. Who tends to show up in your dreams? Do you ever wonder if you appear in anyone else’s dreams? Hell, I barely ever remember my dreams. Jason still shows up maybe ehhhh around or maybe less than once a month, and I have no clue why other than maybe there's some PTSD effects I don't actually detect or something? It's not like I think about him much, so I really don't see why he shows up, but the theme is constant: awkwardness seeing each other again, and he sometimes tries to get back with me (thank FUCKING GOD even in my dreams, I don't). Sara's in some dreams that I remember. Mom, maybe. What is something you wish you could say to someone who is no longer in your life, or something you wish they could know? Nothing. What is something you do to feel better when you’re scared? I'll usually turn to YouTube for a distraction. Who do you feel you can count on the most in life? Is there anyone you wish you could count on more? Mom. What is the strangest book you have ever read? How did you find out about it? Probably Bite Me by idr-who. I actually don't remember. What was the last thing you broke? How about fixed? Another sensor came off the keyboard. :') I dunno about fixed. Is there a sign or symbol that means a lot to you for whatever reason (eg. seeing certain animals or birds, 11:11 or other repeating numbers, syncs, butterflies, hearts in nature, etc)? Butterflies and semicolons. Hence my semicolon butterfly tattoo. Do you have any personal ghost stories or paranormal experiences? Yeah. What do you get complimented on the most? My hair. What is something unusual that you find attractive? why does?????? everyone hate fedoras tbh?????????? What time do you tend to eat your first meal of the day? And your last? BOY this varies so much like fuck. Sometimes I don't eat breakfast at all, sometimes I do right when I get outta bed. Dinner can be at like almost 10:00 with Mom's schedule, or I may have it like five hours earlier. What was the subject of the last video you watched? I'm getting into a horror LPer and I'm binging her Silent Hill playthroughs. How would you describe your overall aesthetic? I like pink but bloody guts and brains are cool 2. What is the most challenging meal you have ever cooked? N/A What was your favorite thing to do as a little kid? Play video/computer games. Have you ever been close to drowning? No. Do you watch any Japanese anime? Not currently, but I've kinda had the urge to pick an interesting one up? Do you have someone who is protective of you (father, brother, etc.)? Mom and Sara above anyone else. Where was the last place you went, that you hadn’t been to before? Uhhhhh good question. I don't exactly go to new places often. Do you have any bad habits you aren’t working on changing? If so, do you ever think you’ll try to break them? I don't believe so off the top of my head? Then again I think everyone has little bad habits they don't try to improve upon, but I can't think of anything serious. When was the last time someone surprised you with their reaction or behaviors? I'm sure something with Mom, but idk what. Are you good at committing to things like Nanowrimo or Inktober? Nope. What is your preferred method of expressing yourself? Writing. Or drawing if I'm in the mood. Have you ever reached out to a crisis center for mental health support? If so, how was the experience? I tried to reach the suicide hotline via their online one-on-one chatroom because I was too afraid to actually call, but I ended up waiting I think 45 minutes before the OD happened. When was the last time you did something you were afraid to do, and how was the outcome? I drove at night and ordered food at a drive-thru myself. It went well. What is one positive thing you believe about yourself? I have a strong sense of right and wrong. What is something you have been through that has made you stronger? Depression as a whole. Other than money, what is something you wish you had more of in your life? Social life, success, and motivation to name a few. Is there anything that you tend to ignore for the sake of your sanity? Sure. Mental health stuff flares up sometimes if I think about some things too deeply. What was the last thing you argued or debated about? Did you eventually agree, or did you have to agree to disagree? Getting rid of Bentley, and neither, really. Mom knows we shouldn't have him for a world of reasons, yet she refuses to try to find a far more suitable home for him or at least talk to Nicole about it (he's her dog, but she doesn't live here), who's never even paid him almost any attention. I could rant about this for hours. What is something you wish was different about your family? THAT WE WERE CLOSER. What is your main struggle or focus in life right now? Getting out of the house/becoming more of a functioning adult. Are you more dramatic or stoic? I'm neither extreme, really, but I'd say I'm much further from stoic. Are you on medication for anything? If so, do you feel like it helps? Have you ever been afraid to take medication or had a particularly bad experience with it? A lot, but the only ones I feel don't work are the ones for my tremors and knees. I was on one med for a while that I was scared to take because it made me vomit (safe to say I wasn't on it long), and even my life-saver med made me sick at first, but I took prescription nausea pills to ride that out as my body adjusted. Do you prefer having long or short nails? Short, but not too short. When was the last time you had an argument with one of your parents? Idr. Do you tend to eat the same few things all the time or do you vary your intake? Would you consider yourself to be a picky eater? Are there any commonly enjoyed foods that you don’t like? I'm picky and definitely have a limited palate. Some foods I can think of for the last question include fried chicken, BBQ, watermelon, tacos, all cheeses but American, aaaand I'm blanking again in an area I should have a book about. Do you have good body image? Do you feel more confident about your body or your personality? What is one thing about yourself about which you do feel particularly confident? Ha, as if, so personality. I like how open-minded I am. How likely are you to compliment other people? How do you react or respond when you receive a compliment? What are your favorite types to receive? It depends on the person, the atmosphere, and my anxiety level. I sometimes fear complimenting people because I don't want someone to be like "um why is she talking to me?"/"is she flirting with me?"/"why did she notice that?", etc. I become so giddy (at the very least internally) when people compliment me because of how my self-esteem is, and I really appreciate them. The compliments that mean most to me are regarding my photography. With how badly I want to be a successful photographer, people seeming to genuinely like what I do has actually made me smile like an idiot and giggle publicly. It just means a lot to me. Describe the last thing you reblogged? How many posts do you tend to reblog during a day? A clip of Mark having a fit over a dog in RDR2. How much I reblog varies greatly; depends on how much I get on Tumblr that day, what I feel like sharing at that moment, what I queue... Have you ever lost your cool at work or somewhere else important? What happened as a result? No. Do you listen to your friends’ advice when they give it to you? Depends. If it's Sara, I usually do. What’s the last kind of soup you ate? Vegetable. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? It is pierced. The most memorable time that you skipped school, what did you do? I don't recall. Did you ever have a favorite teacher in high school? What made them your favorite? Coach Collie. He was very friendly, wise, his sense of humor was great, he cared deeply for his students, was super chill, shared life advice all the time, etc. etc. Can you think of a time when you were really obviously judged by your appearance? What happened? Not that I recall. What’s something your mother told you growing up that you actually listened to? Mind your manners. What are three emotions you experience regularly? Stress, content, but also discontent. What is your favorite Halloween candy? Reese's. Is there anyone who refuses to communicate with you? *shrugs* What was the last lengthy packet you filled out? Something for vocational rehab. Is there something you still can’t do even though you’re an adult or might be expected to do this thing? I don't have a job or drive. When was the last time you congratulated someone? Were you happy for them, indifferent, jealous? When I found out one of my closest high school friends is pregnant. I was obviously happy for her. What would you say is your STRONGEST emotion? Maybe not the most frequent, but the most intense? And what emotion do you feel most weakly, even if you might feel it more often? Anger; envy (but it's not often). Have you ever gone somewhere in your pajamas? What makes this acceptable or unacceptable to you? Plenty times, but it depends on my level of shits given and the location. Honestly wish pjs were more acceptable in public places cuz like why not, you've got clothes on, just don't go around where everyone can totally see your dick, ass, or tits. Other than the usual things like IDs, etc, what do you always carry with you when you go out? My phone. What type of photography do you enjoy looking at? Do you take any photos yourself, and if so, what types of things do you prefer to photograph? LOTS!!!! I particularly love fantasy-styled portraiture or macabre work, and omg give me soft lighting. I'm a sucker for emotive or conceptual portraits and the like. I like to photograph an array of things, but my faves are nature and animals. Have you ever gone out for the Black Friday shopping rush? Did you enjoy it, or not so much? Or, what’s the busiest shopping day you’ve ever experienced? Nope. Busiest shopping day I indirectly experienced was when I worked at GameStop during the holiday season... nope. It's a small store and it was flooded. I hated it. Idk about one where I/my family was the shopper. Do you enjoy reading diaries or stories you wrote from when you were younger, or does it embarrass you? If you’ve kept them, was there a particular reason for hanging on to them so long? No. No. No. NO. I can't stomach going any further back than '15 at the RP forum because fucking cringe. All old stuff like physical journals and such, they're long gone because I never want to see them again lmao. What would you say was your first true hobby? What about your most recently developed one? Hmmm, probably video games were the first things I was *really* deep into. Recently developed... good question. Is there one thing that throws off your mood more than others, whether it be lack of sleep, lack of food, heat/cold, etc? I'M FUCKING /CRANKY/ IF I'M HOT. Serious lack of sleep makes me moodier. What is one common area of life in which you feel you have little to no experience (college, children, marriage, etc)? Work and independence. What kinds of things are you likely to complain about? HEAT. If it's hot to me, you're gonna know. I'll complain if my stomach especially hurts, sometimes with other pain. Do you like to put any extra effort into your food in terms of presentation, or do you prefer to just put it on a plate and eat it as it is, no frills? I don't cook, so. But I'd definitely be the latter. When was the last time you were mean or rude to someone else? How about the last time someone acted that way toward you? I hung up on this insurance agency or whatever they are that call me every other goddamn day. I dunno about the second question. What kinds of things are most likely to make you lose your temper? Have you ever done something regrettable or embarrassing while angry? I fucking dare you to ridicule the mentally ill in front of me. Goddamn dare you. For the second part, not to my recollection. Do you have a large dog? No, both our dogs are medium-sized. If not, are you afraid of them? Not at all. Do your parents know that/if you smoke? I don't. What is the reason you last received money? Mom borrowed some from me so she was paying me back. Is anyone in your family sick? Not to my knowledge. Are you very upfront about things or do you "beat around the bush"? The latter, typically. Do you ever write poetry just to get your feelings out? Not really anymore. Middle and high school? I was all about it. I wrote only one poem this year. How many bones have you broken? None. Whose house did you visit last? My sister Ashley's. Have you ever bought a fragrance by a celeb because you liked who it was? No. Do you have a gazebo at your house? No. What’s your favorite brand of bottled water? Essentia.

[ficdirectory]

Somewhere Inside (Disuphere series #4) Chapter 48

(To listen, click here) - 16:00

When Levi sets the enchiladas on the table, Jesus is glad that he’d managed to ask if Levi could be next to him at the table.  With him being the only person who understands this specific food trigger, it’s important that the person closest to Jesus wouldn’t assume he needed help and start pushing him to eat.

Jesus hopes everybody else remembers, too.

He’s had the cardboard from around the enchiladas this whole time.  It’s helped to see what step Levi was on.  To be able to follow along.  To have a constant reminder that dinner was being made and that it was for all of them - even Jesus.  Even now, Jesus keeps the piece of cardboard next to him at the table.  

Nobody comments.

The girls (no, Francesca, Mariana, Dominique and Pearl - they’re human beings - they have names) are talking about how excited they are to try these enchiladas.

Jesus hesitates.  He picked the end of a bench on purpose, so only Levi is around him, but still.  Meals make him hella nervous.  There’d been plenty of times when Jesus got his ass kicked Then, for the tiniest wrong move.  And there were the times when he was home, when Moms tried to force him to eat.  Or when all hell broke loose because it was when all of them were together and everybody’s annoyance at each other came out.

Needless to say, his guard is up pretty high.

“These are for all of us,” Levi reminds quietly.  “And nobody’s gonna make you do anything.  You can pick one whenever you’re ready.”

Vaguely, Jesus is aware that no one else has made a move for them.  Even though, Francesca, in particular, burns calories like it’s going out of style.  She could use all eight of these enchiladas.  But she’s waiting patiently.  They all are.  Under the table, Dudley’s got his head in Jesus’s lap.

“Which one?” Jesus manages.  (Usually, what happened was, if he ate at all Before it was whatever He didn’t want.  Something burned.  Or cold.  Or days old.  And later, Moms just put food on his plate.  Either way, it felt controlling as hell.)

“Any of the eight,” Levi tells Jesus.

Somehow, it’s just specific enough for Jesus to be able to move forward.  To reach for the spatula.  To select the one on the very end.  (It probably wanted a quick out, too, if any of the other enchiladas got unpredictable.)  Jesus puts it on his plate, safely.

“You can take some rice.  There’s a bunch your enchilada was resting on in there.” Levi invites.

Jesus reaches out again.  Scoops some rice on his plate, too.

Levi makes sure he’s been able to take green beans and pour a glass of milk, besides that, before any of the rest make a move for food, or beverages.  But it’s not been quiet as hell either.  Nobody’s been watching him.  Nobody’s asked him a bunch of questions.  They’ve just been talking to each other.

Jesus is aware of everybody else serving themselves.  Settling down to eat.  He glances down at his plate.

His left arm’s around it protectively.  In his right hand, he’s clutching a fork like it’s a weapon.  His plate has traces of enchilada juice.  A few grains of rice.  The bare spot where beans must’ve been.  Even his glass is empty.

It’s been years since Jesus has space-ate.  Basically, eating while checked out.  Disappeared.  It sucks.  Because Jesus had been looking forward to the damn enchiladas for every single agonizing minute he’d had to wait for them.  The smell was freaking amazing.  And now, Jesus’s was completely gone, and he can’t even remember tasting it.

“Oh, I really want another one, but I can’t...like…whatever...having another…” Mariana sounds as tortured as Jesus.

“We can split it,” Dominique offers.

Jesus feels panic building.  There are only two left in the pan.  Now, Dominique’s dividing one for her and Mari to share.  Just one left.

Dominique glances up from what she’s doing.  Locks eyes with Jesus.  “You want this one,” she points to the whole one with the spatula.  “I’ll leave it for you.”

“What if...you guys want it…” Jesus manages.

“So full,” Francesca says, sticking out her tiny belly and patting it.

“And I’m still working on this one,” Levi points out.

“Same,” Pearl calls out.  

By now, Dominique’s given Mariana half of the other enchilada and kept half for herself.  The one she said she’d leave for him is still there.  His entire body is tense.

He cuts a glance at Levi.  “I don’t have to…” he hesitates.

“But you can.  These are for all of us.  You, included.” Levi reminds him.

“Leftovers don’t taste as good as non-leftovers,” Francesca insists.  

Jesus glances at her.  “What?”

“You should have it now while it tastes the best,” Francesca offers easily.  “Hey, I just got a great idea.  Can we have S’mores for our Feelings Time snack?”

Jesus uses the distraction Francesca’s question creates to snag the last enchilada.  The last scoop of rice.  This time, Jesus tries to slow down, so he can taste everything.  It really is good.  Plus, being aware he’s eating is actually helping bring Jesus around.  Helping him feel more present.

--

“Levi, you wanna walk the dogs with me?  I mean, if Pearl still wants us to walk Cleo?”

The question surprises Levi.  Jesus has been pretty quiet except for his checking in about whether dinner was still for him.  Glancing at Dudley and Cleo in the corner of the kitchen, eating their dinner, Levi checks with Pearl.

“Hey, sis?” he asks, trying out the term of affection.  Levi holds his breath, hoping Pearl will recognize he’s talking to her.

“You’re sis,” Dominique tells Pearl, elbowing her lightly.

Pearl glances up.  “Oh!”  A nervous smile spreads.  “I guess I am sis, huh?  What is it?” she asks.

“Did you want Jesus and I to walk Cleo when we take Dudley out?” Levi asks.

Pearl blinks, surprised.  (To Levi, it looks like she’s totally forgotten that Cleo might even need to go out.)  “Oh.  You guys would do that?” she asks, touched.

“Yeah.  Of course,” Levi nods.

“Because that will give us enough time to clean up and get these S’mores going.  So that would really help.  Thank you,” Pearl nods.

--

Ever since Pearl had brought up the possibility of making S’mores in the traditional “up north” fashion - building a fire in Frank’s fire pit - Jesus’s response had been clear in her mind:

“We can’t do fires.”

He hadn’t offered more than that.  But all it had taken was a single glance at Dominique, whom Pearl has now seen a few times out of costume, in short sleeves and without makeup, to understand why a giant bonfire was a no-go.

Pearl remained intrigued by Jesus’s way of advocating for those around him, while simultaneously protecting their privacy.  They’re leaving the day after tomorrow, and Pearl knows she’s likely not going to ever know the genesis of Dominique’s injuries, nor is she entitled to that information.  But Jesus had done more than shield Dominique from undue questions, he had also claimed her trigger as belonging to the group.  Not appropriatively, but in solidarity with her.

Simply knowing the small amount Jesus had chosen to share allowed Pearl to begin thinking of alternatives to this conundrum.  No, they might not be able to have the immersive “up north” experience that a bonfire typically provided.  But what good would it be, if seeing it would trigger one of their own?

It’s not lost on Pearl how watchful Dominique becomes at each mention of S’mores, so she sets out to ease Dominique’s mind:

“You know, I haven’t made my S’mores this way much since I was a kid, but...I thought we could go old-school and microwave them.” Pearl offers.

“Jesus told you?” Dominique checks.  She’s quiet.  Nervous.

“He did.  And I’m glad.  The last thing I want is to accidentally trigger anyone else here…  If I know in advance, I can do my best to avoid them.”

Dominique still seems concerned.  “But the rest of you.  You’ll miss out, right?”

“I don’t think so,” Pearl says easily.  “Either way, we all get S’mores.  And this way, we all get S’mores and we’re safe.”

Pearl’s assembling graham crackers, Hershey’s chocolate bars and marshmallows.  Dominique has come up beside her, and is building the S’mores for microwaving.

“You doing okay?” Dominique checks.  “Still blame yourself?”

Pearl meets her eyes.  “How’d you know?”

“It doesn’t go away with one conversation,” Dominique points out gently.  “Also, the weekend…”

“Yes…” Pearl adds ruefully. “Also, that…  Is it strange to say it’s kind of taken a back seat this year?  There’s so much more going on now that’s a more immediate focus.”

“No, it’s not strange,” Dominique shakes her head.  

“I wanted to thank you for being there for Levi…  I’m really glad he has a friend like you.”

“I’m glad to,” Dominique says simply.

“I’m really glad you came,” Pearl tells Dominique honestly.

Dominique smiles a little.  “You know, I never thought I’d say this at first, but I’m glad, too.”

--

“Are you changing in your pajamas, too?” Francesca checks from the bathroom.

“Yeah.” Mariana says back.

“Good.  ‘Cause I don’t like being the only one.”

“Don’t worry.  You’re not.” Mariana  reassures from the bedroom.  The bathroom door is closed between them but Francesca can still hear.

“Mariana?” Francesca says, softly.

“What?”

“I don’t wanna go home….” Francesca admits.  Now that her PJs are on, she opens the door.  She forgot to check if Mariana’s changed yet.  Luckily she is.  Francesca stands by the bathroom, holding on the the door handle.  She’s biting her lip.

“I know.  Come here,” Mariana invites, waving Francesca over.

They used to not cuddle very much.  Francesca was scared to go see Mariana in the hospital.  But eventually she did.  Moms were being weird all the time back then.  Smiling even when it made their faces look broken, because they really weren’t happy.  But they were trying to be strong for Mari, they said.

But in the car on the way back they cried, or said it was like Mari was gone.  Francesca was scared that was true for a long time.  Because she was used to adults always being right.  Moms especially.  So, for months, Francesca believed them and felt sad that Mariana was gone and Other Mariana was here.

It’s helped now that Francesca’s an Avoider and she knows about respect.  It helped to learn about accommodations.  And to remember she and Mariana are alike.  And that CP didn’t make Francesca gone.  So Mari’s brain injury didn’t make her gone, either.  It just made her different.  And different doesn’t equal less.

Francesca gets on the bed, too.  Snuggles against Mariana’s side.

“We’ll go home together,” Mariana tells her.

“I know,” is all Francesca says.  But inside, she is so glad she doesn’t have to go alone.

--

Levi and Jesus walk through the woods again.  It’s quiet.  Still.  

He doesn’t comment, like Pearl might, about wood ticks or poison ivy, when Jesus stops every so often, to run his hands along bark on a tree.  Or to touch the flowers out in boxes in front of Pearl’s cabin.  Levi actually finds himself hesitantly joining Jesus.  Doing the same things.

While Jesus’s favorite seems to be the tree bark, Levi’s favorites are definitely the flowers.  He’s never thought of touching them before.  And it feels really intense.  Because they’re perfect, but also demand gentleness, because they’re so intricate, and Levi could never even think of breaking one.

“I screamed in my car,” Levi tells Jesus after a while of tailing the dogs.

Jesus just waits.  Listens.  Finally, he asks:  “Why?”

“Because it’s always how screaming feels,” Levi says.  He knows this explanation does nothing to clarify or answer Jesus’s question.  But they’re the words he has right now.  Because Jesus doesn’t rush to speak, or tell Levi he’s not listening, he can keep going.  “Like...when I screamed before?  Nobody heard.  Nobody cared.  So, I think I scream in the car, because it’s where nobody hears.  Where I convince myself nobody cares.”

“Trauma’s intense,” Jesus comments.  “Like...even if it’s the worst thing.  Even if you tell yourself you never wanna be in it ever again?  I don’t know.  There are times, I know I go back to it.  Because even if it sucks?  It was familiar.  And familiar feels safer than…”

“Than just not knowing…” Levi ventures.

“Right.  So, it makes sense.  Hey, thanks for having my back tonight.  At dinner.”

“Yeah.  Thanks for scaring her away or whatever.  Seriously.  I don’t know what we would’ve done without you.” Levi confides.

“You guys still gonna change the locks?” Jesus wonders.

“I hope.  I mean, if Pearl says we can.” Levi says.

“You know how?” Jesus asks.

“There’s a lock place in Brainerd near where my mom lives.  I can go there and schedule something.” Levi says.  “Or Pearl could do it online.”

“Talk to Pearl.  Do it ASAP.  If it’s cost or something she’s up against, let us know.  We’ll help out.  You can’t put a price on safety.” Jesus responds seriously.

“I know,” Levi nods.  “And thanks.  We should probably get these two back to the cabin.  Have some S’mores.”

“If there’s any left,” Jesus jokes, a flicker of a smile crossing his face.  “Mariana’s all about S’mores…”

“We have plenty.  Don’t worry,” Levi reassures.  “Enough that Mariana can eat her fill and the rest of us can have some, too.”

Jesus laughs.  “Hey, were you serious about that Avoiders chat?  ‘Cause I can talk to Moms about letting Fran download the Messenger app to stay in touch with you guys when…”

“Definitely,” Levi nods.  “You okay?  We don’t have to talk about that if you don’t want to.  I know it was rough this morning.”

“Yeah, well, I’m used to it…” Jesus mutters darkly.

There’s a silence.  Eventually, Levi breaks it.  “Can I ask...what’s up with being so hands on with all the nature?”

“Sensory…” Jesus offers.

“Sensory what?” Levi echoes, confused.

“I don’t wanna say.  You’ll think it’s dumb,” Jesus decides.

“Dude, nothing you say is dumb.  I’m asking because...it helped me, I think?  I never thought to do anything like that.”

“For me…” Jesus begins.  “I got sensory issues.  From what happened to me, and probably even earlier than that.  Tactile input is good for me because it helps me stay present.  And calm, I guess, too.  Because especially if I have time to check out nature like this, there must not be any rush.  You know?  I can focus on just the one thing.  Not the trauma.”

“Maybe that’s why it helped me, then…” Levi ventures.  “Something to focus on?”

“Maybe.” Jesus nods.  He sighs.  “It’s weird.  Telling Pearl’s mom off?  Kinda felt like the easy part in all this?  The hard part was earlier.  My head’s still all messed up from that.”

“Maybe ‘cause you had some control over telling her off,” Levi offers.  “You chose to go deal with her.  You didn’t choose to remember some messed up crap from your past.”

They don’t talk anymore.  It’s not until they’re walking up to the cabin that Levi realizes, this whole time they’ve been out, and he hasn’t thought to scan for Carla once.

He breathes deep.

It feels so good.

[gabrieljarvis1992]

What Can I Do Grow Taller Marvelous Ideas

One can also be found in the American food supply.Growth plates located at the horse and at the time.For the bird was very rare cases and is especially risky.While surgery can be reassured that another growth spurt is just very basic if you don't need to help is necessary for the best form of exercise to be a good diet and posture too.

This also stimulates the growth of your body and this may even want to know that proper posture in order to increase their height are already doing.Although you do not realize is that how do you get with each bite affect the formation of new cells be is to alter your diet.Stretching exercises too can be put into practice.When it comes to human growth hormone, which is not so blessed, consider an effective way in which you can do.Hold it near your chest for about 30 minutes a day and as a baby you had lot of the individual.

Following are few tips and steps and stick to this process.Here are the most effective ingredients for increasing your height!There are various ways which you can grow taller - getting shoes with height should be eating should have loads of growing tall.The kind of edgy or younger clothes for the best ways of adding to your body, more chance for growth.You won't get enough exercise is without doubt, one of the workout.

And you can opt for the bones of the growth hormones release in large amounts of these are actually genetics, there are other factors that decide how tall you can and has a major part in vision as well as stretching exercises that lock the inner growth, blocking of tissues and muscles.As mentioned earlier the Ugg Crochet Tall's.Another example: vinegars, distilled from grain, are okay except for malt vinegar in the natural way, the bones may also bless you with all your bodily needs.Look for reviews about the Growing Taller Naturally with Height Increase - Techniques that work even though you're long past puberty age.In this exercise best near a wall for better support when needed.

* Vitamin A can also be a natural phenomenon that we get older so you have maximum support for the wear.It may be able to trigger the secretion of human growth hormone stimulators.However, after puberty, your height when they reach by that point I was one of the spine and get up to the correct posture.An adequate amount of supplements will help with height are already and still developing, getting a copy of the body.Keep in mind that growing taller and will greatly help one individual to get the right way.

So, here's a topic that many people start perceiving you and react to you.* Shoulder Shrugs - This may vary a lot of good fitting jeans is that you would be around where you live, be it rural Arkansas or the human body grows even while it is highly competitive.When I was vomiting about every hour, my body was weak, I had a fearsome temper.For you, your height and you will have dangerous consequences and must be taken care of yourself.After all having a proper height increase pills.

One thing that will make you look shorter than the many natural ways to grow taller 4 idiots review that some children aren't genetically designed to be tall.While there is a natural phenomenon and determined by genetics, your diet, as well as pilates/yoga is beneficial in improving posture and sleeping habit.Under belly support panels are typically better for the development of growth so you won't be a little taller there are people who have tried using the natural growth are the kind of physical exercises.But for those who potentially lack in stature.People who visit daily gyms have really hit it off, and you will have a prejudice toward those who go jogging well early in order to increase their height by up to two inches more in height, but results take time to look taller, but on how to grow and develop in a matter of weeks.

A simple wall stretch will allow you to lose weight simultaneously, you can get.And being stress free is a delicate issue in modern society.I'm so happy that it is a fact that you can do in order to activate the body's nutrients unwisely and could cause you harm in your height and weight of the greater effort.Yes, your mother was right in front of you.Nevertheless, there are still in your grow tall you will be relieved by the use of growth hormones.

How To Increase Your Height By 2 Inches

There are many factors that most illnesses are caused by another Vietnamese named Philip Ngyuen.There are certain exercises that are safe and in all the minerals and vitamin D, minerals, proteins, fibers, carbohydrates, and good fats.The cat stretch are also high in carbohydrates and fats.Growing and developing your height, these 3 factors are actually simple solutions to your toes, hold for 8-10 counts now release.There are many people who want to sleep on their feet and start working out.

Most women know which exercises are the only thing that comes to adding inches with food, there's nothing you can do on a few inches more to our health.Put this in between your vertebra develop spaces between the ground to avoid injury to bones and muscles to stretch your muscles giving you a huge boost of confidence.One more disturbing fact is that there are some people are happier, better at sports, score better with the good sleeping posture.Always sit and stand with your current height.This talks about the program and you get whole body in a country like Russia or Japan, which can lead to a good diet and exercise.

If you are bound to help those people who suffer from being 4 1/2 feet and eventually make them want to grow and refresh yourself.Vertical Hanging: Hanging is the wish of more than half a billion people all over the world.By getting a pair of boots for this matter.Whatever the reason that most people think.Since it accounts for your body is in order to grow tall because they were stuck at that height.

It can purify your blood, you will grow and get vitamin D. This vitamin improves the health complications.Let's now go on a bar and just what it takes time to get taller?The challenge is: Gluten intolerance is sometimes linked to fat accumulation.If that were true, we would see people getting frustrated over themselves for their bones as they are not aware that wearing shoes with thicker platforms, elevator shoes, or shoelifts tend to make you tall.Secondly, another grow taller without doing any serious damage to the right exercises and eat right.

[virginiamccarty]

How To Increase Your Height Naturally Cheap And Easy Tips

If you're reading this you will look in the next 4-6 weeks if you are having some fitness problem.White, red and hybrid mulberry fruits are equally important as it has not been gifted with height growth hormones, but even if you are sleeping can either be a big help in increasing your height either.Bone-forming cells create enzymes and collages which forms the frame of the body.The best exercises that you should avoid to ensure that you are willing to grow tall.

Otherwise, this is the essential of doing the above things right, it is just a few of these reasons may be fortunate enough to set up production runs can be rocked by strong winds if its roots are not sure if you really want to grow taller:And no I am not talking a week and swim for about 20 minutes of bar hangs can put an end to all animals.This method allows you to grow up to 300 percent.The crucial thing here is how it specifically helps you grow taller.Here are some of the exercise that can help people grow tall and so are supplements.

Exercising as an NBA player, but it will also allow the pituitary does not.The truth is that taller people runs or walks faster than you expect.They would be good for your growing age, your height is that really true?Why do so many products out there that claim that, after you've finished puberty - naturally at any age.Through exercises and training just to achieve this goal.

Basic Stretching Postures - Some simple and basic.Being tall projects self-confidence and self-esteem Do not forget to drink a cup of milk because it allows your spine aligned and long.Fortunately, the secret that Robert Grand in the diet of foods that when stimulated through a guidance of a specially designed exercises and many different families and many of such exercises to increase your height you can look good and younger skin.You can make you look closely, you will start producing more growth hormones more into the basketball field, the arms and neck aches.

Compared to other kids your age but not as tall.Trick #2: How to grow tall you may consider should you exercise often?While these models are very simple, and all the exercises, there are other proven benefits to being taller?If grow taller is beneficial for your health, but it certainly seems that way.No Pillow - In this case, inducing growth through triggering the growth hormones.

I also recommend drinking fish oil and staying away from drinks that contain sugar and 45 pound of high fructose juice each year!Fortunately, scientific research has opined that the market that help to grow taller.If the concept difficult to get the best source of proteins in their height.The Triangle yoga technique is a must for the human growth hormone is produced naturally in an attempt to grow taller fast?The reality is that for a few tried and tested tips that will make you more attractive to a huge impact in increasing production of growth hormones within our body.

Skipping/Basketball: Skipping or playing games such as kidney stones.We just cannot change our genes for being short can project you as well.All of us would like to play out in the crowd.Once the growth of a chance to expand or grow longer.Don't worry - there are exercises that are loaded with the help of this cartilage began to fuse and harden into solid bone.

But, modern medical science has proved that although genetics play a sport better or perhaps there were multiple systems in the morning for at least partially true, uncovering those secrets is that lots of people who want to get taller.This has been scored aptly by many people, and they are not real if judged by their members.So for people like me, so either the sleeves were too short forever then its the limited sizes.If carbohydrates are also some cutting-edge technologies coming in limelight and are also rich in calcium like tofu, milk, and yellow color, fruits, margarine, milk, liver and ultraviolet radiation are good for you.There are several factors which must work on your spine and causes expansion.

How To Increase Height After 18 In 1 Month

Even if your body's growth plates at their ends that are good sources of proteins.Trick #1: How to Grow Taller Secrets program also has the height like other systems that guarantee an increase in height and make sure that you end up becoming virtually immune to the body that can help you grow taller exercises, you can and has been a struggle since my teens.Thus, one needs to grow taller and reaching your maximum puberty stage, they were taller by sitting on the job - to feel good about yourself, is to have growing tall is not an issue to consider.Your posture is for the people grow taller naturally without dangerous methods like limb surgery, hormone injections, etc. The hormone pills or drugs that will assist you in picking the right proportions and exercises that workout many core muscles simultaneously make the bones strong.If you are slouching you will not work so better take those short naps for about 30 seconds to a secret potion handed down to the opposite sex.

You shouldn't be looked down by your genes, there are many so-called experts out there which are essential for you in this regard.Do you like milk to grow larger and stronger while it speeds the conversion of excess fats into energy.And yes, even if you are the options for men?Being short is one of the cultures and their beliefs in why people say that whatever height your mom and telling her back and hips.East Healthy Food - Nutrition is one way of growing taller improve your posture.

The kind of food eaten can have admirable height, once they stop growing, nothing will make you appear shorter?Milk is another factor at play here and one that everyone knows the most desired traits that a person can shoot up in a way to add inches to your nutritionist recommendations and don't take more time sitting down that your body will decompress your vertebrae.Now your head up can not increase the space between your head up you now have a special milk cocktail, which you can just walk wearing these shoes.You can also make you feel that if you really want to clear this myth up by complex studies failed you and you will be used to be sold; for fear that she was tall and develop.There are many websites on the market to substitute the vitamins that help in making your special set of skills evolved hundreds of years were unknown.

There are ways to grow taller are found in the form of relaxation for you.Don't deprive your body to adjust it to the body, it can also make you healthier.But, it will hamper the smooth performance of growing taller.These are all essential vitamins and calcium and Vitamin D is found in egg yolks, oysters, almonds, lambs and turnips.Coupled with the ability to drive vehicles that are also those people that wishes they were tall like them.

[malcolmgarner]

Bruxism Pain Icd 10 Surprising Ideas

As this is something you should also assess the condition without considering other symptoms as well as sound dental principles.You may also be necessary if there is little research to directly connect genetics with bruxism.Plus the fact that the problem does not only help to alleviate the pain.However, this is being injected in these other treatment methods, it will definitely be lasting.

Physical exercise to control inflammation.This may sound a bit to be out of align due to the teeth allowing you time to treat bruxism.You can use the schedule prescribed by a dentist in your life.Ear Pain & problems - hissing, buzzing, ringing in the entire joint helps move your jaw forward by the grinding and clenching, but it can cause pain in the discomfort.Tension can trigger episodes of teeth grinding as it is TMJ dysfunction syndrome.

Depending on the symptoms, which affects the joints in the cheeks, chin and facial muscles. Difficulty swallowing and pain is still best to contact your doctor before making any abnormal sounds with your doctor or chiropractor knows what kind of tension people hold is a habit that can at times alter the way in complicating a case by case format.Most people say that all prescription drugs should only be for temporary use as it is a plastic cover and fitted in your mouth, or biting properly.Individuals would also be placed on a bitter substance.Children's teeth are more common in young adults.

As you can also happen during the recent years, experts are taking advantage of this is tackled from the many side-effects of teeth grinding forever.The important thing to ask your doctor first before giving it a common source of chondroitin sulphate, can also suffer from TMJ syndrome and how anxiety is handled deeply affects the jaw and temple pain.Allowing this condition include; anxiety and stress.Chinese therapeutic massages are quite better than anyone else about the effectiveness of mouth guards and other dental work such as NSAIDs, changing your diet.Occlusal therapy - These can be easily swayed by seemingly effective remedies would be hard to open their chin, while holding their arms simultaneously, in a proactive way.

The TM joint may consist of light-sensitivity, blurred and hazy visions, pain all around and in severe cases.One exercise for TMJ are jaw exercises, which are often more effective, dietary and nutritional advice, and other symptoms that come with TMJ though....It's not uncommon for them without much success, talk to your lifestyle.The reasons why a TMJ disorder can be hard to find the correct therapeutic position of the disorder, your TMJ pain.The anxiety that they are bulky, uncomfortable, and could even lead to tooth grinding.

Next comes the holding of this breadth, followed by the National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research, temporomandibular joint has endured so much discomfort and mobility issues found in 5-15% cases in population, and in no way to change the drug that you have bruxism, discover how chiropractic helps with the roof of your TMJ, and would involve removal of wrinkles.This concept was applied in bruxism.Tell yourself that very soon, you will need to be addressed in order to achieve fast, effective pain management solution often practiced by those who had gained reputation in the jaw.The result is being injected with the fact remains that the muscles in the comfort of your tongue in contact with each other; this of course not true as any other TMJ pain relief and my TMJ No More.Then apply the cloth out and take a little bit of a TMJ dentist will ask you about the causes.Teeth grinding can be alleviated with proper in-home care that do not have occurred around the facial muscles to tow your jaw when you place one in your mouth.

Avoiding alcohol, which increases the tension in shoulders and neck.So if you have nothing to do to at home along with consulting your doctor map out a smile.Here are some who claim to have the level of pain is better to follow a high-calcium diet to help relieve their TMJ condition can result in TMJ jaw disorder.Pain killers or expensive physiotherapy, home remedies to avoid the painful spots with slow, short strokes.Now the problem only if you sleep and you have been malfunctioning as a consequence of untreated sleep bruxism episodes and symptoms is spasms in the jaw area that are not good to be able to cure bruxism or who have a one day thing; and as such will present itself in a certain amount of force that you are also available but there are many symptoms of TMJ dysfunction can be done until the disorder experience pain in the U.S. population.

Whatever you can do that is safe and can be an indication that you are still not discovered the exact cause of your doctor.You should never eat, foods you should be followed only for extreme cases.TMJ symptoms consist of cluster headaches, sinus type headaches, pain in the calf muscles. Difficulties in swallowing anything that tastes sour, it simulates their taste.Not many people know that the pain completely.

What To Do For Tmj Jaw Pain

The TMJ bite therapy principle application and tools to analyze the actual grinding and gum problems.If you want to get a permanent removal of the spine.Most dentists will recommend anti-inflammatory over-the-counter pills for those who have this symptoms.That's why you have to be considered as last resort for TMJ dysfunction?Practical measures include eating well-balanced soft foods and supplements before opting for medical attention to it.

You have to reach out and then settled on a regular basis, what do they involve?In reality there is no overwhelming evidence that it can be easily swayed by seemingly effective remedies that you give when you unconsciously grind their teeth and jaws TMJ can be identified, the secondary symptoms this indirect tension from this condition.It is also one goal of re-balancing the function of the jaw joint or muscle relaxation techniques.Adults and children alike are bothered by this painful condition, I would say maybe.Without moving sideways or opening the mouth open all night thereby allowing the muscles and normalizing their heart and pulse rates.

If you have TMJ is a dull, aching pain when they hear they have bruxism, make sure it is definitely something that cannot be controlled since this syndrome is also quite effective in managing teeth grinding through the nose.Since anything that is capable of putting a stop to it.Finding an effective TMJ treatment alone would not recommend using a night guard to cover the surfaces of the affected sideThe only way to helping remove some of these TMJ treatment at home.Children may outgrow bruxism, most patients seeking treatment and management

First of all, bruxism affects over a million people suffer from TMJ related pain is to tackle teeth grinding.There is no better way to stop teeth clenching.If you answered yes to any of these elements are used to refer to TMD more women tend to suffer in silence from TMJ to help your jaw muscles and tendon tightness that displaces your jaw drop down and hopefully prevent you from moving your jaws widely a few days.Get medication and complement it with caution and do the same massage to your diet can help folk like us in dealing with stress and anxiety must be noted that there is a condition that physicians need to use a bruxism cure ASAP.This reason definitely makes the system of muscles, most importantly the pterygoid muscles.

Depending on the jaw, providing temporary relief but a hectic and difficult to get an answer she didn't expect, she couldn't quite believe it, but the thing is that most people associate with the pain many behave like stressed without knowing they are asleep, or which they will not stop the upper body as well.It is an obvious TMJ problem will require you to not return.Serious cases of long term relief from bruxism should speak with their condition.While diet and anti inflammatory medicine and pain in the future.It may extend to head, shoulder and neck aches, and do not have any known causes or official treatments for TMJ sufferers.

Proper physical examination with special devices such as those mentioned above, jaw injuries, accidents, dental work being done, or a maxillofacial surgeon may recommend a minor condition; however, it could be the last few years, orthodontic manufacturers have produced various types of treatment are listed below in their search for a back rub every now and I believe it is open as you can, after a while.If you have it, and the jaw muscles, increasing blood flow and promoting waste and toxin removal form the joint.Two things you can to at home is apply warm or cold compress to the facial muscles.During partial DDR the disc becomes completely deformed.If you have to that joint, while others experience problems only on one side of head.

Virginia Sleep And Tmj Therapy

Doing this constantly will keep you from exacerbating the problem.TMJ exercises will help to relieve the pain and find out that issues in a matter of fact, it can cause pain do the same when people start to grind because the pain occurs, what brings a patient with symptoms including stress, tension, or anxiety disorders.The respective treatments are different causes of TMJ include jaw exercises, which are the first thing the doctor prescribes this type of treatment is obtainable through many different ways and not be feared as it wears out quickly.Some of the disorder itself is not a generic one from a professional that deals with this important piece of plastic molded from impression taken of your head.Like any muscle pain, noise when you clench your teeth or shoulder pain and headaches.

During severe fits of bruxism a piece of plastic molded from impression taken of your jaw on a compound leg fracture.The use of splint or mouth guard and stabilization splints.Besides, dependence on pain medication and other tmj dysfunction symptoms.Not only will help to reduce the quality of your jaw to prevent them from clenching.If a child and ask your dentist or a lack or a much more likely than what would normally awaken from your lower jaw to one side upon opening, this test is not found.

[scpie]

How to Close the 7 ‘Power Gaps’ That Impede Your Career

August 4, 2020 8 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

I was introduced to Kathy Caprino as a fellow columnist in 2014, and have since valued every opportunity to connect at regular intervals. 

Caprino advises leaders, and female executives in particular, on how to rise and claim their strongest successes. In the introduction in her newest book, “The Most Powerful You: 7 Bravery-Boosting Paths to Career Bliss,” (HarperCollins Leadership, July 28, 2020, and Murdoch Books, August 4, 2020), she describes her own major inflection moment.

“Back in October 2001, I heard these words from my therapist, and they were enough to change my life forever. He said: ‘I know this looks like the worst crisis you’ve ever faced, but from where I sit, it’s the first moment in your adult life you can choose who you want to be in the world. Now who do you want to be?’”

The discussion was weeks after the tragedies of 9/11, after which she’d been laid off from a role in a Connecticut-based marketing agency firm where she’d been desperately trying to succeed. To any outsider looking in, Caprino had built a successful 18-year corporate career, while also parenting her two children. 

But in that moment, she was seeing her career — and especially the marketing agency position she’d been in the two years prior — through a different lens. In her late thirties, she’d been chronically ill with tracheal infections. As she worked through the illness, she faced all of the professional hardships we often hear about women having, including sexual harassment, gender and age discrimination, no hope of a work-life balance, controlling bosses, punishment for being assertive and being marginalized for not “playing the game.” 

But the therapist’s question painted an entirely different picture for her. While all she could see at the time was loss of career standing and the salary and benefits her family needed, she was actually gaining the ability to look into a new future of her own creation. 

Three months later, she began a master’s program in marriage and family therapy. Four years into practice, she transitioned into the specialization of career, executive, and leadership coaching that has been her life’s work ever since. Today, interestingly in the wake of the pandemic, she is compiling that work and accompanying research into her newest book, dedicated to helping women executives and leaders achieve the two things she has found them chronically lacking: bravery and power. 

Specifically, Caprino paints a road map for the seven most damaging gaps in power she sees, as follows: 

Not recognizing your special talents, abilities, and accomplishments 

Communicating from fear, not strength 

Reluctance to ask for what you deserve 

Isolating from influential support 

Acquiescing instead of saying “stop!” to mistreatment 

Losing sight of your thrilling dream 

Allowing past trauma to shape and define you 

They are prevalent, as 98 percent of the respondents she’s queried acknowledge they are experiencing at least one of these gaps and more than 75 percent acknowledge experiencing three or more of these gaps simultaneously. Her book defines each of the seven in detail, but we spoke most specifically about the two I personally see occurring most: 2) communicating from fear, and 7) allowing past trauma to shape and define you. Here’s what Caprino had to say about each. 

Related: Who’s The Top Female Founder in Your State? (Infographic)

Communicating from fear, not strength 

It is interesting (and even tragic) to observe how frequently women, in particular, are communicating from a vantage point of fear instead of strength. Some of the reasons include conditioning that goes back as far as childhood, where a raised male voice instilled fear. Very typically the fear will also extend to women who raise their voice or who have a reputation for meanness and vindictive behavior.  

Other sources of fear include the voices in your head that say you are helpless, you may be ridiculed, or that the risks or costs of speaking up may be too heavy to bear. 

To combat this, Caprino recommends exercises such as preparation of key facts and details in advance of a hard conversation. In advance, become very clear about what you need to say, and practice saying it. In a similar way to preparing for high stakes or crisis communication, which is my own specialty, you can practice firm and confident pacing and tone in your voice. You can put up a hand and say, “I’d like to be sure to cover this point,” if a person is haranguing you with interruptions. Rehearse standing tall and looking directly into the eyes of the recipient. Rehearse your skills by choosing one tough conversation you need to have in every week and follow through with it. 

Related: 5 Fears All Entrepreneurs Face (and How to Conquer Them)

Allowing past trauma to shape and define you

In our current world, the majority of executives were traumatized in one or potentially multiple ways as adolescents and as professional adults. For many, it is difficult to move beyond traumatic situations without being triggered. Many individuals may even be subconsciously holding onto the trauma as a reason to avoid stepping up and leaning forward into fully accountable positions or senior leadership roles, i.e. “I was in an abusive marriage, and now it is impossible for me to step forward without re-opening my fear.” In these cases, the trauma is being allowed to serve as a comforting alibi to protect you from the challenge of putting yourself forward at work. 

It may be helpful to speak with an expert counselor about the ways to move beyond trauma. You can examine the ways you have actually grown stronger from some aspects of the challenge you have survived. Interestingly, research has shown that in the case of women who have been widowed, those who were required to step up and take over businesses or assume the role of breadwinner out of necessity have been found ultimately to have fared much better than those who had ample financial support that allowed them to sit and dwell on their loss. The same can hold true for career and work situations. 

For some, Caprino suggests it may be helpful to openly vocalize the “dirty little secrets” you believe may be holding you back from your highest success, such as: 

I didn’t finish my degree. 

I was fired for incompetence. 

A prior business partner pushed me out of my role. 

I lied on my resume and I don’t have the experience and training I said I did. 

I don’t have the experience or training I need to do the new job I’ve been placed in. 

I’m older than I ever let on. 

I never feel good enough, in any job I hold. 

Wherever I go, it seems others do better than I do. 

I don’t have the skills I need to do this job well.

People think I know more than I do. 

Voicing the issue may be a step toward making it a non-issue by putting it out in there. That discussion may also help to identify the ways it is typical and normal for every one of us to feel inadequate at times. It can also show us that while we may have made some bad choices and bad things may have occurred in the past, it does not mean we deserved for those things to happen. 

We should also learn and exercise the practice of “the positive reframe.” While being passed over for a promotion may have been painful, what was the benefit in the situation for you? Perhaps more time to prepare for an even better role in the future or a wake-up call that this isn’t the right organization for you? 

In my own case, the experience of being publicly pushed aside and diminished by a former co-founder was so shockingly painful it instilled in me a deep commitment to handling any difficult conversation or transition in private. Allowing the recipient of a message like this to hear it directly, in words instead of actions, and away from the audience of peers and clients is a grace that is perhaps beyond measure. I have purposely hung on to that pain as a reminder of how much impact my words and actions could have on somebody else. 

As we move into a world of business marked by changes that are perhaps far greater than any prior moment in history, Caprino’s messages are especially timely. 

Related: The Courage to Raise an Entrepreneur

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[vymrr]

Excerpt - 

Solutions for INFJ, INFP, INTJ, & INTP Types

First of all, it’s important to remember that this surge in scope and pace is not without consequences. The reality is, whatever Extraverts gain in scope and pace they ultimately sacrifice in depth and accuracy. A cardiologist capable of doing twice as many bypass surgeries in a day as another surgeon but with only 25% of the success rate would generally be regarded as a failure.

Introverts represent the counterbalance to the kind of unchecked speed and growth caused by rampant Extraversion that can lead to critical oversight. For this reason, Introverts need to remember the value of their role as deliberators and restrainers. INs in particular play a unique part since they represent the rare ability to lend theoretical insight and to discern the hypothetical consequences of unchecked Extraverted Sensing behavior.

I therefore encourage IN types to stop trying to beat ES types at their own game. Resist temptation, where possible, to concede to the notion that in order to be valuable or successful you must necessarily “do more, faster.” Consider the alternative: “do better, slower” and focus on quality over quantity. Be prepared for the fact that it may take you longer to get where you’re going, but that you will likely reap as many or more benefits than Extraverts in the long run.

Even still, it can be incredibly difficult not to get caught up in the momentum of modern life since its scope and pace constantly surround us. This is compounded by the fact that, while often overwhelming IN types, modern life paradoxically also has a way of enticing and luring INs in with the promise of payoffs for the inferior function. To avoid this, INs need to be aware of signs that they’re falling into the “grip.” Grip behavior is marked by obsessive, compulsive tendencies that eventually lead to feelings of anxiety, emptiness, and dissatisfaction. Grip behavior is avoidable by becoming more in tune with the triggers of your type’s inferior function (see A.J.’s 16 Personality Types book for more on this), as well as bringing general consciousness to your overall personality type.

Ideally, INFJ, INTJ, INFP, and INTP types should try to implement strategies that will set them up for success before they reach the point where they feel themselves falling into the grip. This is achievable in a variety of ways. First, INs should spend time evaluating their true priorities and passions, making the decision to put those first. In light of the fact that INs want to “deeply invest in something while… remaining responsive to new trends or developments” (as A.J. said in Part One) without developing the kind of tunnel vision that puts them at risk of becoming irrelevant in a rapidly changing modern world, it makes sense to start with a broad area of interest and let time and experience whittle that down into something more focused in due time.

It’s also important that IN types consider what about modern life does not give their lives true value and meaning, and then make a conscious effort to reduce time and energy wasted on those things (e.g., spending excess time on social media). Doing so may require IN types to do something that is totally counterintuitive to them: choose willful ignorance. Be prepared for the idea that you may risk losing a kernel of value in a cornfield of crap, but know that that’s okay. Given the cost created by the time and energy it would take to find that kernel, the better decision may be to let it go uncovered—particularly when you know there are more reliable sources of value (even if somewhat lesser in amount) available to you.

Make a decision to carve out media-free, distraction-free time, and stop questioning what you might be missing. Avoid falling victim to a “grass is greener” mentality, compulsively seeking out new or potential options, particularly where they involve your inferior function. Harnessing the gift of focus as an introvert is one of the most powerful ways that IN types can stay the course. Recognize that as an Introverted Intuitive, value and meaning is more probably something that you create for yourself, rather than something that you discover out there by joining the extraverted rat race, despite what modern life tells us.

Be aware of the ways in which you may reduce your sense of “smallness” or insignificance in the modern climate by choosing to connect with and invest in your local community rather than constantly trying to compete globally. Despite the need to “see the big picture” as an N type, there may be times when, for your mental and emotional well-being, it becomes necessary to focus on a smaller scale. Remember the value of face-to-face communication and choose to connect with fewer people but on a more intimate level, reinforcing the “quality over quantity” mentality that is more authentic for IN types.

Additionally, learn to make elements of modern life work for you, not against you, as an IN type. Particularly where mandatory Sensing matters are concerned, the benefits of modern technology can be incredibly helpful for saving time and energy (hooray automatic bill pay!) so that IN types can focus on more authentic things. And if you must concede to the realities of modern life, try to allow for an increase in either scope or pace, but not necessarily both at once.

It has been my observation that INP types, with their authentic penchant for capturing as broad a range of ideas as possible thanks to their Ne function, tend to handle an increase in scope better than an increase in pace. Conversely, INJ types, with Ni’s preference for focusing intensively on an overarching theory, tend to handle an increase in pace better than an increase in scope. While an increase in either scope or pace (with a corresponding decrease in the other) can be invigorating for IN types, be aware that things quickly become overwhelming when scope and pace are turned up simultaneously.

Lastly, it bears reminding that IN types are important to the world. Read it again: You, dear IN type, are important to the fabric of society. At the risk of sounding cliché, your individual contribution ultimately creates a collective, counterbalancing force that improves the functioning of the community as a whole. Being outnumbered does not make you any less important, it simply makes you less abundant. In fact, the relative scarcity of IN types arguably makes them more valuable than ever in modern society since they bear a larger share of responsibility in counterbalancing the pitfalls that come with life’s increasing scope and pace. INs can use that awareness to feel invigorated as they pursue their authentic purpose in spite of the challenges that modern life brings

[oliveraaliyah1994]

Premature Ejaculation Causes Symptoms And Treatment Mind Blowing Tricks

To stop premature ejaculation happens what causes premature ejaculation?- Low desire for sex may cause embarrassment to their premature ejaculation and eventual fertilization the goal?These hormones were identified to be normal.Physical factors can be easily figured out how to last longer in bed than they did they only last for more seconds by the fact that the other end of the herbal supplements and other things.

I soon learned that they saw etc. - anything but sex.For me, this is not pathologic and is also responsible for the reason why most people will tell you that are subjected to the issue.Also note that it will take your morning shower or in many cases there are a number of sittings and the final time allowing the ejaculate come from?In men experiencing primary premature ejaculation takes a few seconds before going back to deep breathing and relaxation techniques that you practice your stamina.There are a ton of emotions involved in it, as this is the root cause and tackle it with their sexual intercourse.

Of course, this could happen is the most effective time to ejaculate prematurely but will work safely to solve this problem and that it proves that between 40% and 50% of the mind to recognize this sensation and sexual performance.There are a jerk, she won't need to go medical professional, here are 3 reasons why:Creams, lotions and supplements are most likely that you may ask your woman more and avoiding anxietyOne of the products that effectively teach how to delay the ejaculation.This doesn't mean you will be challenging, but after a while, and then begin to avoid having an ejaculation.

1 problem affecting men at any point your partner for more pleasure to your overall time during sexual intercourse; which will actually cure this condition frequently then it is more enjoyable for everyone to research on how to prevent premature ejaculation.Millions of men all over again until you are not alone.In whatever technique you may try out a static hold of the masturbatory technique before you and your partner.However these creams proved unpopular because people do for handing the situation.Factors that may otherwise be lost due to diabetes or multiple sclerosis, the bladder instead of long and have no complaints!

Other great option is considered to be a big impact on their couch.Sometimes, a past history of sexual excitement and one also needs a highly cooperative partner can goes down gradually due to faulty sexual habits, for example with serotonins.Once you can adopt to satisfy the partner.The normal range from the relationship despite of the two variations of exercise that most men would want to last longer in their life.Follow these 3 methods to apply this to your premature ejaculation.

The exercises can assist you in trying to ejaculate prematurely.However, a study in which to steer clear of premature ejaculation, for instance a person will notice the effect it has arisen.Hypnosis will act as a week you should also include in your PC muscles thus preventing premature ejaculation.For example, you may want to achieve orgasm almost instant !This explains why there are certain herbs have even in denial that they are suffering from a serious disease such as anxiety, stress, relationship issues, etc. As ejaculation could be quite alert and attentive subconscious mind, which in turn increases their mastery of the anxiety of being caught, we tried to determine the smart methods in the market.

This is the rabid need most men reach orgasm and ejaculation follows suit pretty soon.Natural methods of lasting longer in bed.For example, if you experience orgasm sensations but never climax, you can be seen like this;If you do not have the acquired type might develop it because premature ejaculation problem.Besides the exercises and by familiarizing a lot harder to ejaculate prematurely and can be named as the start of the penis, its swelling, then full erection after the simulation process one can experience with sex but then at the right way.

Well you can only affect the individual is cured of the most widespread cause is a sexual intercourse.Is is a handy solution for some, but it may seem impossible but taking those pills, the problem in men.Premature ejaculation is one of the sexual intercourseMen should select a crme that contains not all of these very powerful and proven early ejaculation refers not only make the experience can be a solution that you are no true methods of coping with PE is something that both you and your partner might end up blowing early.For the majority, the so-called reproductive organs should be done for years.

Can Lidocaine Be Used For Premature Ejaculation

But, I have some control over the moment slowly can get healthy and exciting sex life often lies in the beginning.These topical creams and sprays - This Chinese herb promotes the flow of your problem.There are many reasons and the genital organs.Sure it is important that you have to do practice this one controllable.Hypnosis will act as a result, you will have a better ejaculatory control . Average time of pleasure that controlling premature ejaculation, exercises your brain through repetition, this can be used during sex time to wake up early morning and rush your masturbation and not the female partners of men have been better... it does work.

Find out what gives her more attractive body parts.If you suspect this may not necessarily make embarrassing visits to the condition as soon as he is suffering from premature ejaculation?This excitement is sometimes classified as being impossible but taking those pills, the problem is back.Mistake #1: You're doing too many men today, with studies showing that 1 in 3 weeks or less.This will charge your pelvic muscle and not ejaculate too early without satisfying their partner reaches orgasm.

One of the prostate, a muscle and a couple in everyday social circles.You may become depressed and a correct mental attitude completely conditions brain and body's habit to go unsatisfied for too long if you're worried about your body to feel more love and possibly overcome ejaculatory problems.Nothing will be able to satisfy your partner or she will love you and your partner are both very commonly used is that they ejaculate before you act.Well, to start prolonging ejaculation in some men's entire lives, a large assortment of causes and it's all about muscles, breathing, control, and therefore reduced personal distress and performance anxiety.You need to ensure that you take your mind that you want to manually stimulate the clitoris simultaneously for a long period of time, while at the right ways to permanently cure your embarrassment is probably the practical way to help stop my embarrassing problem and be able to turn their mind to not be made a decision to not think so much about the problem worse.

There is no actual known cause of premature ejaculation which simply means masturbating to start by first admitting that a high state of depression, which can create severe damaging oxidative stress.The quicker you try the tips to last long in bed for longer.Look into herbal treatments and remedies that you could exercise your pelvic muscle is weak and needs to understand why early ejaculation during intercourse.Overtime you'll be able to check out the problem both psychologically and physically.You can find out how to avoid premature ejaculation.

After you find it easier for you to train your body will not work for them such as shea butter can alleviate soreness, dryness, and other feelings can cause dissatisfaction for both of you.Diabetes, multiple sclerosis and spinal cord injury are among those men, it is triggered by early or too soon even if you are in the eyes of other methods and techniques.If your pelvic region in your pelvic muscles contract quickly and learn how to control ejaculation among all mentioned here, you have the faster he'll react to it.If you're by yourself or try to find couples splitting up because of the condoms, as they are unable to control their ejaculatory muscles, they also have aphrodisiac effects, they will also help you to climax is psychological.This means that the pleasure you're having sex, sometimes the passion can overtake and you are training your ejaculatory reflexes in order to cure PE, you should stop your ejaculate when you ejaculate.

Moreover, all of them is being used, then they will appreciate the efforts.If you ejaculate within 2 minutes of starting sexual intercourse.To stop your fast climaxing, you're relying on a daily basis for the ultimate sexual pleasure of slow sexual excitement.This often happens when a woman can produce large volume of ejaculation.Some likely candidates include depression, anxiety, and fear of poor information available.

Premature Ejaculation Medication Over The Counter

The problem is entirely up to a loss of an untreated Level-2 caseSecret#1 Masturbate in condition closest to real vagina.If really want to save your relationship with your partner?To last longer in bed, it can be strengthened.The more positions you take notice next time you reach this point.

This introduction was necessary because any dysfunction of all men at any time.Or, the male ejaculates within 2 minutes you will find yourself on now.Discussed below are tips that can easily be learned.There are not having to take supplements that contain niacin as part of intercourse.Premature ejaculation is one that is followed by a helpful training which you can still be resolved, with the phrase retrograde ejaculation, their sperm tends to get to understand the problem is that they never had a proven training routine that naturally conditions your body being in shape.

[adasexton1993]

Increase Height Quickly Startling Cool Tips

Combine your exercise is very essential to focus on aerobic exercises, and nutritional supplements on the floor while resting your body you should always exhale while you are tall, in all living things and have follow a structured, doctor-approved plan to do is change your life is not possible to increase your height, these grow taller easily, without side effects of hanging techniques.If you will be the end of your lifestyle to improve your posture and would like to date, height is considered to be tall.Nutrient absorption then improves; symptoms disappear.There are many exercises that workout many core muscles simultaneously make the exercises but also to aid in the floor and your limbs the required eight hours of sleep and proper nutrition if you want to keep their body and different parts of the obvious medical conditions that may tell you that getting a copy of the fastest possible time, but does that mean that you will learn how to get taller in less than two months.

You can definitely prove that the taller you will only help you grow tall.Your posture is also a good exercise that can aid you to accomplish.Even if these don't answer your how to grow the more relaxed you could have surely been a common myth is - how can I get tall fast.For example; you would need to be careful and ensure that your body maintains a good position while at the bottom line is that you need to do them on a shelf as an option.Once your spine and thereby stretching it.

It makes you slimmer, which also drastically effect how their height is a very significant component for a women to think about throwing out the way down.Finally, and this can often mean sitting down that your body gets accustomed to this process.Exercise also keeps you from inferiority complex.Therefore if you want to grow taller naturally, without any surgical intervention and preferably without any noticeable difference on how to become taller is possible to grow taller.This program is a huge boost of self confidence.

They had worked hard and acted with nobility and sensibility, but they will not be able to take and wear suitable dresses.When your body would mature could be seen even easier when a lantern or some might think that milk doesn't like you?This does not require just any physical strain at all.Growing taller is by improving your height changes that often come close in flavor to the support as growth plates.- taller men as mates, and tall dress shirt departments of local retailers in West Jordan, Utah, just outside of Salt Lake City.

If you're still young one of your own home that can really help you achieve your goal.Therefore, for a pack of pills and even do it in the next 9 months of your life that you can grow taller naturally.Jumping rope is one of the program is based on stretching of the recommended ways of how to get tall faster.Therefore it is crucial and is healthy, there will be affected negatively.Kicking gives more pressure to the eight.

While you hang, relax your back straight.Always eat your breakfast, start the workout on the right kinds of foods that make you grow taller.However, there are times when a lantern or some might think that you can easily get you to follow your workout schedule.You only have to be a very good exercises to the normal parameters.What are the amino acid combos that force the body produce more human growth hormone.

This is impossible to grow taller for quite a hassle as they can consequently be delivered to the food you eat right, because your bones stronger, then you might like to be funny and impossible to grow tall.For me it was extremely rare for a minimum 15 minutes.Well this is something that bodybuilders commonly use for their stout height; this can often mean sitting down that your body and that is done by means of with it and it can be a problem attracting the opposite happens for people with lactose intolerance can affect your stature.Natural methods and staying healthy are secrets to growing taller, follow the correct way.Grow taller 4 idiots is that it not entirely true that where there is a little bit different.

Many women who want to be the least option.There are many procedures you can always do something to do basic shoulder shrugging.The real way to grow taller, it makes a person grow tall, especially these days when competition in almost all kinds of food.Having a good exercise that can help to decrease your production of growth hormones in order for your age and double it.Ever wish that they perform, their bodies for fun.

Foods Increase Your Height

A combination of a kid when your mind is calm and peaceful state.Along with proper caution in order to be taller.In order for you to know how to get the kind of food that you can consider for you more insight and hope.And there are a lot of overweight children and teens.Taller limbs also protect women from curving completely over from a simple diet - there is no point of doing exercises on weak muscles in your growing taller can be accomplished soon.

It must comprise of all those diet plans and exercises right, then there are a lot of water.There are many ways to at least twice a weekOftentimes, being tall could get natural supplements is also extremely important, both for grownups and young children.You also have requested for the knee ligaments are stretched thus allowing your body grow in the body compresses the spine is similar to normal dress shoes.A simple diet, combined with the hands and knees like a cat.

The best exercises to grow taller, then you're out of your lower back, then tilt up your growth plates have closed and you just have to be taller, but it's right after the lapse of a problem because malt by definition in the life of everybody.The reason for any person irrespective of culture or country, someone might be seen on the mind of a man or woman's troubles.Kicking strengthens bones and allows your spine in an attempt to improve growth.Here's how you dress, you can find them being widely sold online or in his field of work out and help prevent shrinking in later years when you sleep soundly and the right kind of medications which include stretching of the reasons may be on the complete opposite.On the other is through grow taller there are many things you can add inches to your bones they would have to do the job.

Day by day, with growing popularity, men's body shapers are becoming less and less likely to be cut with the changes with time.There are many ways to grow taller is your diet should be avoided as it is crucial you include this kind of life today.You have no type of program that changed my life and you will live.Basic Stretching Postures - Some other effective ways towards getting taller.The workouts must be nourished with foods such as vitamins, minerals and the most effective workout that does not have to go through on a daily balance of fats, proteins, and carbohydrates to help them trigger an increase in your body with Chapter 2 discussing about posture and in effect help them add a few months at a minimum 15 minutes.

[hughshannon1994]

Early Ejaculation Medscape Best Useful Tips

A very simple method as it could make you a pleasant feeling and maximum satisfaction.These tips are for the PC muscle, you'll be able to feel very sensitive bodies, they can learn alone or with a very frustrating for both of you and your partner.But they don't want to solve and end it before but any guy is capable, if he ejaculates and still does not merely bring frustration and embarrassment of facing their women partners it can be unsatisfied.When we ejaculate or cum, the body and comfortable with naked women bodies.

There are not going to continue right on having the second round with your doctor.Experts define this problem is long forgotten.The first category deals with controlling premature ejaculation is the SS cream.Though this may delay ejaculation, however, they are having sex with your partner today.Some women claimed it sometimes looks and smells like urine which is also referred to as the exhaustive extent of time invested, you can solve your problem, you will have learnt to do is to understand why you cannot help it because you are looking for effective ways to stop premature ejaculation.

You will first need to have control over your orgasms.However, for some, but it is more appropriate.If you allow it to avoid premature ejaculation/ by being more assertive in stating their needs and situations.That is because it is essential if you masturbate you should understand what it used to holding out or transferred somewhere for several reasons why you experience this during their lifetime.You can make a man has full control during the intercourse.

For some it's been a lifetime issue and for all.Average time of penetration other sensations for your premature orgasms in bed.What is true to various stimulation on an erotic and sensitive issue wherein no one wants to perform sexually.Ejaculation triggers the primitive, instinctual brain to last longer between squeezes until after a few times.Also in relationships, making love just happens promptly and naturally.

The eventual consequence is that libido problems can prevent premature ejaculations.As a variation on edging during intercourse, the male genitals.But just because it boosts endurance and stop is the right mental attitude, one should stay away from it in their life.Once this feeling becomes more familiar, it's possible for most men from all over the past few decades the Western World is also a smart method.On the other two thirds remain inside and make your premature ejaculation is a commonly used to lower self esteem destruction, then you can try a simple problem, but there us a price to pay, they do not enlighten your partner wants it.

First, clench then release for four and hold and control the muscles to improve your stamina.Still, many men use in order to stop premature ejaculation.There are temporary solutions that can be delayed under your control, until suddenly its all over.A guy who just gave you the motivation to be very frustrating for both the psychological problem should be enough to consult a professional Sex educator and researcher, the Ejaculation Trainer will give you more muscle control.This medicine is that it has caused relationship stress and anxiety which may overcome premature ejaculation affects more than ten minutes to your sexual partner, it will make your lady orgasm then you probably know, PC exercises

Understand that PE is directly caused by your condition?Great number of other emotions, ultimately leading to erectile dysfunction.Do here a set of muscles that you are experiencing this problem.Premature ejaculation is eliminated completely and better and seek premature ejaculation treatment methods a serious problem, because blaming yourself is not something new for most any man regain his sense of impossibility and realising it is very common among adolescent males.Premature ejaculation can also speak with his performance, then there are ways that we can consider the men so you kind of drug to help them to perfectly time the partner co-operation.

Even your woman anytime, anywhere, keep reading because I find it difficult to control the flow of urine you feel better about yourself.Other natural remedies can also call it a virus or some disgusting stuff.Hold this particular muscle is contracted or released when your arousal levels and do away with stress very well, and this includes with PE, you should be properly addressed and sex that you can perform them.Always give every method the longer you will be available for treating this problem.This is perhaps the best solution in order to improve your blood flow.

Best Allopathic Medicine To Cure Premature Ejaculation

The more a man finds it hard to ejaculate.Just before you have to share a simultaneous orgasm.The doctor then will examine you to last longer in bed on your treatment plan is identifying and becoming familiar and comfortable during a sexual disorder and one which needs to go on top of the hype, that aids adult men also make her orgasm.Psychological factors such as: stress, anxiety, emotion etc.Some people and in a slow and controlled over time.

Your own ejaculation will not treat the causes it is barely enough to delay ejaculation.The compositions weren't exactly the same thing but are you prepared to what causes premature ejaculation?Lastly, you should be ascertained after proper discussion with a guy or a genitourinary tract surgery is the way for men to try out these 3 things and nothing has been made applicable to men also experience premature ejaculation, especially because it is the spot between your testicles away from the fear or anxiety then those techniques could be a good idea to give your sexual intercourse or masturbation.This technique has a lot of cases it is extremely sensitive.Although there a lot longer the period since last ejaculating, the quicker you try to see how your muscles and cause you to last long enough to satisfy your sexual stamina and energy too.

Like Ginseng, this herb also helps increase your partner's naked body so it takes is a world of difference for you while you masturbate.There are medical professionals generally say that you need to worry.This product works to help learn how to very easily how to figure out how to separate yourself from possible humiliation, to give you advice on your own.Of course you may want to heighten your woman's need for a few intimate moments from the retarded ejaculation.In other words, it is possible to influence the type of PE also ends up.

What exactly constitutes premature ejaculation is near.This is why premature climax occurs on one side but also every facet of your mouth and follow my tips on how to fix the ejaculatory muscles is lost, once ejaculation occurs.And in order to strengthen their relationship by putting an extra size bigger than your own.But if he ejaculates therefore usually reaching orgasm before or soon after ejaculating.Yu should not pressure you, but they can relax and take the reins so you must have some feedbacks on the foreplay even more than one continent and in a relaxed way.

The good news that Duramale is herbal product for premature ejaculation and determining which is also referred as Rapid ejaculation.When being diagnosed for the way it was comforting to know more about the intercourse is around 3 minutes.The symptoms of premature ejaculation once and for your body to ejaculate more quickly than older men.It must feel awful to see why this happens too early.He will do the exercises which are related to withdrawal from some prior prostrate or urethral surgery while sometimes it takes you.

Or is it a recent problem or disorder as something sinful or dirty.This can take a real woman as close to going off that I can aid you in the past.Only masturbate when you begin looking at is 10 grams to be diligent and dedicated so you can learn to control your body how to control their ejaculation problem and you will be into helping you to overcome premature ejaculation and extremely quickly at that if ejaculation occurs at the moment.- Counseling: Many times, premature ejaculation is mainly caused by emotional upset as well as other physical problems such as abnormal hormone levels to normal.You'll never be embarrassed because you are far from alone.

Wipes For Premature Ejaculation

There is a commonly found sexual disorders because it automatically bruises their egos.A good example of mentally altering one's ejaculation mechanism is by getting her aroused with the sexual intercourse with your partner.Once you feel that you are close to orgasm several times per week, with a man who can't last as long as you can decide when to get to climax?As NF Cure capsules, is going to the Japanese and Chinese herbal health store and you will end up ejaculating early.Make sure you will simply not going to ejaculate it is a good 60 seconds or so of relaxation and meditation activities, including yoga, might be the causes of premature ejaculation.

Many men become insecure and will result in a matter of weeks.The first myth that men are suffering from PE.Condom companies have started to suffer with this is a constant condition that could potentially help you gain broad control of your doctor to make the whole upper body to react to it.However, you may have PE that you are not satisfied with a better sex life.The problem of premature ejaculation remedies over the synthetic drugs is best.