Echo’s world has gone decidedly… wobbly. Blurry. Fuzzy at the edges, and what-will-you-else. He can’t feel his fingertips, is his first thought. Kriffing overdid it on the glowing green shots, is his second.
“Holy kriff, Echo, that manhole-cover underneath you is moving!”, Fives exclaims, third. Or more like slurs into Lt. Jesse’s shoulder, who is himself moaning indistinctly into the Captain’s pauldron, who is in turn swaying back and forth gesturing at Commander Cody.
And it really is - the manhole cover, that is, once Echo stumbles off it with a shriek. Jumping up into the now open air with sudden force, steadying and then scraping across paveme-
“Are those kriffing hands?!”
In an instant, seven highly drunk pairs of fists and one blaster, courtesy of Commander Cody (the only one present who’s sober enough to be legally handling it) are aimed in a circle around the cover slowly being shuffled to the side, then the hands reaching up to palm at the edges of the hole -
- and are slowly being lowered again when two white-red painted helmets are heaved into view, along with chest-deep groaning and grunting. Two armored Corries collapse in a heap at Commander Cody’s feet, who stares down at them in open-mouthed shock.
Slowly, Echo blinks. Slowly, he raises a hand to snap his fingers in front of his face. No, still there. Slowly, Fives grabs for a piece of flank underneath his blacks and twists. Echo yelps, and slaps his hand away hard enough to hurt himself. “OI!”
“B’have, boys”, Captain Rex makes a brave attempt to slur out as he sways on his feet, still staring down at the trembling heap of armor at their feet. Whoa, Echo didn’t know they had those kinds of funky armor designs in the Guard. Very avant-garde.
“That’s blood, Ey’ika”, says Appo.
Oh.
Slowly, Hardcase raises his right foot, inching towards-
“Don’t even think about it”, Commander Cody snaps, and Hardcase’s foot whips back to the ground next to its companion. Fives chortles. “Yeah, genius, those are Commander kamas - they’d put you down in a second flat!”
“Why would two Corrie Commanders go crawling out of holes in front of 79’s, huh, genius?!”, Hardcase retorts, somewhat justly, Echo feels. Next to him, Commander Cody frowns, and kneels carefully. “Good question, trooper. Fox, can you hear me? Fox’i-“
Which is when one of the bodies - Commander Fox, Echo realizes with a shudder, The Marshall Commander Fox - convulses on the ground, and an arm rears up to nail Cody face-first with the back of a hand, sending him sprawling back into the pavement with an undignified squawk.
“Thorn”, the sad figure that is the highest decorated clone in existence groans, still faceplanted into pavement, “Thorn, I’m hallucinating Cody. Thorn, tell him to shut up.”
“Shuddup”, Commander Thorn heaves, loyally. Cody makes an affronted noise, braced back on his shebs. “Sdubid Codeh.”
Commander Fox’s visor scrapes against the ground with his nod, a sound that sends the surrounding vod’e cringing. “Yeah, you go, Thorn. You’re my favorite.” A considering pause. “Oh, kark. I need to call in medevac - Fox to Stabby, Fox to Stabby - the kriffing Narglatches are back on the lower levels.”
The Commander’s comm crackles to life, as he heaves himself over with a punched-out moan - oh, yup, that dark patch’s definitely not paint, and are those teeth marks?! On plastoid??
“I’m going to wring Senator Hliii’s neck, and then I’m going to twist him into a human kriffing meat-lasso to catch every last one of his little pets with”, sounds through Fox’s comm, who just hacks out a laughcough in response. “Pinging your location now. Where’s Thorn?”
“Pr’snt”, slurs Thorn.
“Concussed”, adds Fox, “We crawled out forty levels to behind 79’s, so no one would see us.”
Awkward silence follows.
“Uh, about that”, begins Rex, only to be interrupted by a deep groan from Fox.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kriffing kidding me! As if Cody’s ugly mug wasn’t - WHAT THE KRIFF ARE YOUR KRIFFING ARC KARKHEADS DOING IN MY HALLUCINATION, REX?!”
“Shuddup, Rex”, Thorn moans bravely.
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Essek and Caleb both learn the Maze spell and cast it on each other as Wizard Enrichment™. They get sent into a labyrinth with the goal of ‘escape’, and if they can’t get out in 10 minutes, they just get popped back out. No harm, no foul.
It starts out as a fun little activity, but then they start getting competitive about it. First, it’s basic races—who can get the fastest time getting out of a maze. But then, they get into a discussion about how the mazes are generated. Is it random? Is there some pattern to the various layouts? And if so, is there a style of maze that is more advantageous? Does the maze creator have any influence over the design of the maze?
The thing is, Maze only requires a DC 20 Intelligence check to escape. That’s nothing to these guys, and they crack it open pretty quick. So then they ask themselves, can we make it harder?
Their previous toyings with Maze RNG become full on experiments and deep dives to see if they can add increased difficulty. They start adding multiple levels, doors that require you to solve a puzzle to unlock, fetch quests, etc. They come up with the most difficult maps and challenge each other to get their times lower and lower and lower.
They become Maze spell speedrunners and modders is what I’m saying.
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Are you getting paid to defend these white people like this? Like let me know so I can apply.
Really Killejoie? Are you really this pathetic? Taking the time out of your finite existence to create a whole ass troll account so that you can keep sending me hate even after I turned off my anon asks? This is extreme, even for you. 😂
But you know what, I will give you the unearned courtesy of answering your question:
This has nothing to do with defending ‘white people’ as you put it. Nor is it about fandom racism like you want to gaslight everyone into believing. This is just the latest iteration of something that has been happening since last year.
I'll give it to you though, it's a clever tactic. Everytime you get called out for your toxic behavior, you shift the blame away from YOU as an individual and from your own actions, and you make it about ALL black fans and the racism we experience in fandom spaces. It's clever because obviously no decent person would disagree with such a valid point or be seen as supporting something as heinous as racism.
And it almost worked; you managed to stir the entire fandom into an uproar and now I have white women in my inbox and on my dashboard trying to 'educate' me and other black people about what racism is, while being completely oblivious to how pathetic and condescending they sound.
How unfortunate for you then that tangible proof emerged to contradict your lies and attempts at gaslighting, and to show everyone what this issue, which has been ongoing for more than a year, is REALLY about.
And for those who still don't get it, THIS is what it's really about:
----
THIS is why everyone calls you antis and bullies! THIS is why everyone in the fandom hates you! THIS is why you are on several block lists. THIS is why everyone complains about you in discord servers and in DMs because most are too scared to say it to your faces for fear of being targeted next. Well, sadly for you I'm not! There's nothing you can do to me that you haven't done already in the past year. 🙃
I repeat, this has nothing to do with being black because again, most of you aren't even black!!! And yet you have the audacity to attack black fans who disagree with you and think you can speak over us while still calling yourselves #allies.
This is not about fandom racism! Any rational thinking person agrees there is racism in fandom spaces, there is racism in mainstream media, and the is also racism and overt racial bias in Anne Rice's writing—that the show does a more or less good job of correcting. You are preaching to the choir! I've spoken endlessly about all of these points myself and will continue to do so. But that's not what this is about.
This about YOU specifically as individuals. It's about the wildly disrespectful and vile way you treat others in this fandom. It's about the constant harassment, the death threats, the vile language you use to refer to everyone—including black fans, including Jacob Anderson himself.
----
I repeat for the people in the back—including some of my mutuals who don't seem to get it: THIS IS NOT ABOUT FANDOM RACISM! This is about a small group of individuals, a lot of whom aren't even black, who think they can act like complete assholes to everyone in this fandom and get no pushback. This is about people thinking they are entitled to dictate how everyone should interpret these characters and trying to enforce their control through bullying and silencing of dissenting opinions.
Enough with the bullshit!
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