#it makes my brain sound so sexy if i use that excuse

[rokso-o]

So you read the raws? (TCF)

yes. although i do watch out for the eng tl as well or other language if available! i think i improve my language skills that way (.... or maybe this is my excuse to re-read it again and again. who knows)

[planet-dusk]

i sent this skz x 9th member!reader to another creator but forgot who it was so i’m sending it here too i guess. enjoy

i féel like the boys would def be little pervs towards their girl member. like “cuddling” her in the car on the way to places, having her sit in their lap during lives and stuff, constantly watching her boobs in tank tops during practice, etc something tells me chan or minho would be the biggest pervs out of the older boys but they know how to be subtle with it. meanwhile jisung and maybe jeongin are the the young ones who go absolutely crazy over anything. like her boobs could be out a little bc her tops are flimsy so they grab a handful and are lowkey fondling her but using the excuse that it’s helping keep her boobs in her bra or something. she’d def be very clueless but not entirely. like she knows that bc she’s a girl and they’re all guys, they have urges too. walking around the house in short and tight clothes, asking sexual questions, singing and dancing to sexy songs, etc they’d probably have a corruption kink too because of her “innocent but not really” aura. she’s innocent in the way that she’s just clueless when anyone so much as hits on her, likes her, try’s to make a move, etc

idk this was a while ago so maybe it’s just ramblings from my brain.

🏷️ perversion, noncon somno for jisung's part, corruption, fingering, oral (f + m), masturbation, unprotected sex, mc is called baby, kitten, doll, pretty, toy, slut

as the oldest and the leader of the group chan should know better. but you're so cute when you wake up early and your eyes are still puffy with sleep. he can't help but let his gaze linger on your bare legs, picturing his face between your thighs. sometimes when you join him on channie's room he'll run his teasing fingers over your clothed slit, enjoying the way you squirm and hide your hot face in your hands, pretending you're camera shy.

"keep still, baby. you know how much the fans love it when you look all cute and flustered."

minho is always helpful, offering you private dance lessons to hone your skills. he can be strict with the other members but he's noticed how embarrassed you get when he praises you. "you're doing so well, kitten," he whispers into your ear while he adjusts your position. you avert your eyes and try to focus on the way your body moves. he's smirking at you through the mirror, his hands skimming your ass more than necessary. when you're all warmed up and sweaty he bends you over and grinds his hard cock against your clothed pussy. "let's stretch some more."

"i know you can do it," changbin encourages when your voice cracks again. he turns off his laptop and enters the recording booth. "hey, don't cry," he wipes your tears away with his thumbs and you sniffle. you're fucking up your lines. badly.

"do you trust me?" he asks and you nod, letting him spread your legs. with a puzzled face you watch him crouch down and nuzzle the inside of your thigh. "you just need to relax, baby... you're straining too much when you get anxious. let me help you."

hyunjin is your roommate. he's a calm and quiet guy so you don't mind having him around. but on some nights you wake up to muffled gasps and groans coming from his side of the room. if you didn't know any better you'd have sworn some of his moans sound like your name. afraid to let him know you're awake you stay quiet and stare at the ceiling. your own hand slips into your pyjama pants to rub quick circles on your swollen clit, desperate to cum in time with him.

"ssh, it's me," jisung shushes you with a hand clasped over your mouth. you blink at him groggily, feeling two of his fingers slipping in and out of your wet hole with ease. he must've been playing with you for a while. "hyunjin's taking a shower and told me to wake you up." he snuggles against your back and you gasp into his palm when he replaces his fingers with his thick cock. "be a good doll for me now, pretty. we don't have much time before he comes back."

felix is the first to turn your relationship with them into something more than strictly collegial. "we're not colleagues, or friends, or family," he tugs you onto his lap and purrs into your ear, "we're something more." his fingers reach into your shorts and press against your clothed slit, making your head spin. "feel how soaked these panties are for me, doll? you know i'm telling the truth. what we've got is something special."

seungmin is your vocal training partner. when you stay late in the studio to practice he stays with you. his unconventional training methods are your little secret; he'd told you the others can't know a thing because they would get jealous, so you do as told. seungmin makes you feel special. you know he'd do everything for his favorite member.

"sluts like you need to have their throats trained," he groans and thrusts his cock deeper. "how else are you ever going to hit those notes?"

jeongin can never keep his hands off you when you're getting dressed for your stages. he gropes at your tits and tugs on your clothes. "these skirts keep getting shorter," he shakes his head and frowns. "everyone in the audience will be able to see your safety shorts. but you know you belong to us, don't you?" he grins and you squeal when his fingers slip between your thighs and locate your clit with ease. the barest hint of pressure against the fabric has you panting, proving his point. "no matter how many people cheer for you, you're our toy."

[frogchiro]

Sorry it's me again♥️

*prepares to tell you his wonderful CoD idea*

HAREM of call of duty men in a little omegavers or otherwise with us sexy hermits + our sweet hot and sexy jebrael ♥️

also a little question are you going to do these little little ones on Skyrim? lol i'm a sucker for this game (i have over 900h on it)

I hope you won't hate me with these rotten ♥️

hello hello! never apologize bc it's a delight to see you in my inbox <3 also I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I don't really get the part about skyrim ;; if you're asking if I'll ever expand on that little horny thing about the cod men in that skyrim-inspired setting then I'm happy to inform you I definitely would! I've been eating that shit up since 2011 and I'll never give it up ;;

But back on track, I'll make this one about omegaverse cod since there is a criminal lack of it in the fandom ;; about a/b/o Eremites I'll make a stand alone post later on <3

fem!reader, omega!reader; listen, omegaverse is my excuse to be gross so expect lots of smut and hairy musky alpha men <3

For the cod men I'd imagine them all to be alphas (141, alejandro and rudy, könig and graves <3). Very big, very hairy and dripping with pheromones and testosterone and so so possessive </3 They will keep you in the nest and literally herd you back if you tried to leave it, Simon and Price are especially insistent on that as the eldest and most dominant alphas of the pack.

They love to scent mark you especially since you're with them on base, they don't trust any other person with you and in their primal and hormone ridden brains the more you're drowning in their scent the less others are inclined to mess with you (and they are right!)

Philip has a fixation on your breasts, always rubbing and nuzzling against them, biting gently with his fangs at them until you let out delicious little sounds before licking and suckling at your nipples to soothe you <3 Bonus points if your start lactating, then you can be sure that you won't get that man off of your tit </3

[mustainegf]

Hi could you do something where black album era James and a fem reader go to a party but they grow needy so they go to the bathroom

I love this stuff and it was so fun to write, I also have a fic really similar to this one so I’ll link it here :)

The party bustled loudly, and despite the noise, my brain was buzzing with a tension of its own. My boyfriend James, stood across the room with a friend of his, paying me a flirty glance every so often, followed by him adjusting the bulge in his jeans.

Every time he tried to hide his horniness, the flutter between my thighs inscreased.

There was a silent understanding between us. I knew he was horny, and he knew just as well that I was too.

I could see it in his eyes-the way he was looking at me.

The lust. It was simmering right under the surface, waiting for an excuse to explode. And that was exactly what we both wanted.

I glanced at the handsome man, quirking my head to motion to the bathroom.

He gave me a wink, and then nodded. I smiled and sat up from the couch, quickly moving to the bathroom, swaying my hips to tease him.

I snuck into the washroom. James wasn't far behind me, glancing around to make sure nobody noticed before slipping into the small space with me.

He pushed the door shut with a little more force than necessary, making it clear he had been longing for this moment all night.

Ache flicked the lock, sealing us in here together.

"Jesus Christ, you look sexy," James muttered before crashing his lips onto mine.

My back hit the door as our kiss turned desperate, but neither one of us cared. We didn't care about anyone or anything except each other, and that made everything else feel so damn good.

James pulled away, breaking the kiss with a soft groan. "Fuck, I can't wait much longer." His hands trailed down my stomach, coming to rest on my ass.

It wasn't long before we were violently stripping each other down.

James grabbed me with abandon, Liston game and sitting me up on the small sink counter.

Our eyes met again, this time a silent promise passed between us. This is it. No turning back.

We both knew this. Our lips crashed against each other once more, tongues tangling together. One hand gripped my waist while the other trailed up my side, until it found my breast.

Then he kneaded it gently, squeezing it lightly. My breath caught in my throat as he toyed with my nipple with his thumb and index finger. His touch was rougher than usual, but that only spiked my desire for him.

I ran my nails down his chest, loving the scratch of his hair against my palms. As soon as I touched his cock, I felt him twitch. He moaned softly.

I loved how responsive he was to me. I couldn't help but take advantage of it.

I stroked him up and down, not caring that I was sitting up on a random small sink. All I cared about was how good this man made me feel.

"I can't take it, I need to be in you."

He looked like he was going to tear apart if I didn't let him inside me. I was so close myself. The urge to have him was too strong to ignore any longer.

"Then do something about it," I taunted.

"You want this, don't you?" he growled, pulling his cock out of my hand. I nodded. "Yes." He slid in slowly, filling me completely. I leaned back, enjoying the feeling of fullness.

"Jamie!" I yelled, grabbing his shoulders. James was quick to press a finger to my lips. "Gotta be quiet, can you do that for me?"

I nodded. "Yes." He pounded into me hard and fast, making my legs tremble. The hard smack of our bodies filled the tiny space, but it did nothing to cover the moans and grunts we both let loose.

"Tell me how much you love it, use your words, I wanna hear that pretty voice," he demanded, the room filling with wet and obscene sounds.

I could hardly force out any sort of sentence. "L-love it." I huffed. "Come on, you can do better than that."

James sucked a breath through his teeth as J tightened around him. "Let me hear you." He demanded again.

"I love it... Jamie... I love it." He slammed into me harder and faster, using the counter and my hips to hold himself up.

I screamed, holding on for dear life. In response, he pressed his lips to mine and started humming, moving his body in tune with the sound. I was drowning in sensations, so many of them, Ilost control.

I clawed at his arms, trying desperately to get closer to him. He moved his lips from mine and whispered, "That's it, babyy."

He continued to whisper filthy things in my ear, telling me how good I was, how I felt so damn good wrapped around him. The wet sounds of sex echoed through the small space, creating a cacophony of noises.

I could barely think straight. The haze of pleasure was growing stronger by the second.

"Cum for me baby, I'm so close.." James groaned in my ear.

Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him close as he pumped a few more times Until we were both writhing with our climax. I felt him shoot his cum deep into me, painting my insides.

We sat in silence for a minute or two, just breathing. Ilaughed softly, kissing James' cheek.

"Fuck, I can't believe we did that.."

[dairy-farmer]

Okay but CONSIDER~☆ Petty, territorial, exhibitionist Kon!

(Also he has Strong Opinions and I tried to keep things In Character since I am working that. He's against feminizing Tim because he doesnt want to make his boyfriend disphoric. Slight realism to the porn? Attempted!)

Him and Tim? Dating. His memory? Flawless. He remembers EXACTLY all the emotionally scarring bullshit they put his boyfriend through. Tim may forgive, but HE doesn't. Fuck those guys.

What's WORSE? He can hear EVERYTHING. Your expressionless mask doesn't mean SHIT when he can hear your heart rate pick up. SEE your eyes dilate. When walls don't do SHIT to stop him hearing you beating your meat franticly, after excusing yourself to "make a call".

But Tim's HIS. Not theirs.

They break his heart and make him feel not good enough. KON makes him feel loved and powerful and happy. KON spent his whole life, fighting to have things that were JUST for him. His, not superman, not anyone else's. His. And Tim? Is HIS boyfriend. Is amazing.

And Kon LOVES making him feel good.

Really taking his time. Using his TTK to tease and pinch, stroke and hold, keeping Tim JUST where he needs him. Taking care of his needs in the ways Tim never seems too. Over and over, til he's all soft and boneless. Twitching. Gushing all the pleasure Kon pumped into him. Head finally quiet.

It's amazing.

So maybe that's why he doesn't stop. Even though he hears the arrogant stomping of Jon's bratty friend. Jon cleared out to the barn and some loud music over an hour ago. When he caught the LOOK Kon was giving Tim. Smart kid. But apparently not smart enough to drag his buddy along. Because now the little shit is looking for him.

Kon doesn't care.

He is face first between to long, powerful, legs and trying to make Tim's brain melt with his tounge alone. From the grip on his hair? Decent progress, so far. He adds fingers, making Tim's back bow. Earning those awesome little sounds.

The foot steps faltered then froze, outside his door. The brats heart rate has sky rocketed. Turned on by listening to Tim getting finger fucked. What a little perv.

But? Kon's discovered? He's kinda... in to it.

Showing them what they'll NEVER get to have. Showing them how it's DONE. That's right, little perv, listen to how GOOD I make him feel. You could never. This is what he, the REAL Robin, deserves.

Fucking Tim? While Damian stands frozen just outside his bedroom door? Is one of the best times they've had together. Kon nearly breaks his bed. Leaves Tim hoarse but glowing the next day. Granted, with a noticeable limp and unable to sit down, but Tim is hardly complaining.

Kon just grins, like a shark, every time Damian looks at him.

And of course, Kon has to do it again. It was AMAZING. Invite him oooover, babe. He miiiiisses yoooou. Sad face.

Tim laughes but does. Gotham is stressful after all. Even if, for some reason, the gremlin has been avoiding him. Weird, chirps Kon, who knows EXACTLY why. Wonder why that could be?

Arrives to find Dickhea- sorry, Tim's BELOVED brother DICK, who definitely didn't betray him, and TOTALLY didn't try to Put Him In ARKHAM, THAT Dick... hanging around. Trying to "make amends". (Kon's ass he is.) And doing team ups. Hanging like a leech all over KON'S boyfriend. Eating all of the food TIM should be coaxed into eating before there's a chance and lounging around Tim's home like he owns the place!

.....ha ha. Kon's not mad, babe. Promise. He could NEVER be mad at YOU. :) :) :)

(He might murder this clingy bitch, though.)

But, hey! This IS Rob's place. And you know what's Perfectly Reasonable, nay, even NATURAL, to do in one's own place? With their boyfriend? Come here, babe~ My power, clever, gorgeous, sexy, hasn't showered for three days, hot mess~ let's get you cleaned up and in bed.

Oh yeah, your brother will TOTALLY respect Boyfriend's Over time. I texted him for you and everything thing! (Kon didn't and honestly? Dick wouldn't.)

So Kon gets his boyfriend naked. Always a delight. Some sexy groping and forplay in the shower. Wet and sexy fun! A classic. Can Kon hear Dick planning to "head over to Tim's"? Half way across the city? Well maybe certain individuals are about to learn to text first. And that they will NEVER get what they want so bad, no matter how hard they go panting.

Meanwhile? Kon is working Tim up. Hitting all his good spots. Stubble rubbed against the neck, as he kisses his way down. Not too hard, since Kryptonian hair has no give. Just little prickly sparks. Right down to his pecs. Not tits, never tits, or Kon gets kicked out of the bed for WEEKS. Made THAT mistake exactly ONCE.

Manly, manly pecs with the hottest pink little nipples you've ever seen. Likes when Kon uses his TTK for the other one. Focuses on uses his hands to stretch him, tease his fantastic hole and little t-dick clit. Tim totally loses it. Starts trying to RIDE his hand and make him go faster. Always whines and begs when Kon has to hold him still.

Oh look, someone sneaking in the window uninvited. Wonder who that could be? Gee, sure hope he remembered to close that security feed of the bedroom. But, shucks. Technology is just SO confusing! Hope they don't ASSUME Tim is ALWAYS at his desk and go looking there first!

Does Kon sit up and leave Tim's nips to his TTK, just so the cameras can REALLY get a good visual? Of COURSE not. Tim just really, REALLY enjoys the feeling. So he's giving him double the action as he slides home. Even adds his clit to the teasing, just to see that open mouth, gasping for air, feral thrashing look, Tim gets.

Kon hear the searching, meandering footsteps of their intruder, reach Tim's desk and freeze. In that way only a highly trained Bat could. A heart rate spikes and breathe is sucked in sharply. A swallow.

Ah, did Kon for get to turn off the audio? Whoops. Thank goodness it was on low, huh? But I bet that close to the desk, you can hear it. Room's REAL quiet.

Shift of fabric, the camera's audio is turned up.

Perverts, all of um. "Brotherly feelings" his ASS. Kon fucks Tim through his first orgasm, pounding short and rough RIGHT against that spot he likes, just as Tim likes him too. Listens to Tim's perv brother jerk himself desperately. Fantasize about how HE would be SO much nicer and sweeter to Tim's hole. Timmy this and that, like Rob's a little kid.

Like Rob would even be INTO any of that.

Calls Robs pecs TITS. Calls him PRETTY. Has no idea what Tim NEEDS and never did. Can't GIVE IT to Tim like Kon can. Pump into his hole until Tim feels like he's gonna break, then grind nice and deep until he DOES. Tease him for hours when he's all stressed and lost in his head, so he unravels into mush. Lift him up and don't let him down until he's been STUFFED with you. Til his legs are shaking and he can barely see straight. Till all he want is to pass out and cuddle.

Rob needs someone who will lovingly fuck him UNCONSCIOUS and will still be there, holding him, FUCKING HIM, when he wakes up. Needs to be so WANTED it drives someone a little insane. Needs good and pleasure and thoughtless, bone melting bliss. Not babying and tender little nothings.

And frankly? Kon is a petty, mean, Tim-fucker. He's woken up and chosen violence.

Deliberately avoids Tim's g-spot, like that isn't an execution worthy offense. Tell him, babe~ He wants to HEAR. What do want him to do to you? And Tim? Who is being fucking edged and FURIOUS about it? Says BET, opens his mouth, and makes all of Kon's dreams come true.

Holy Shit, Babe~ :D Yes Sir o7

Kon gets to destroy some perv fantasies, hear FANTASTIC Tim dirty talk, AND use TTK to fuck every orifice Tim HAS. It's a fantastic afternoon. He even gets Tim to take a nap instead of going back to work.

And would you look at that~ No clingy leech! You want pizza? Bart recommend this great place. Let's get pizza!

But then Mr. Broody Psychological Trauma is demanding Tim come play hostess to his Gala. Isn't he dating or something? A socialite no less? Make HER do it! But no. Tim has to go entertain old rich bastards and smile.

Fuck it. He's coming too.

Tim just laughs at his blatant gate-crashing plans and hands him an invite. Asks if he wants to go suit shopping. Mmmmmm sexy suit sex. Roleplay options. Yes please. They go shopping. It's awesome.

Less awesome? The party. Very boring in fact. And EVERYBODY wants to fuck his boyfriend. This may be his villian origin story. Also he fuckin KNEW it. "Bruce isn't like that" Kon's ass! He ALSO called that he totally wants to bone Clark. Without his piercings in? And in a suit? Kon looks VERY Clark-ish. Tim's old man keeps checking him out.

Frankly, however, Kon doesnt care.

He's on his last god damned nerve with these "oops! Ha ha, my bad." Handsy mother fuckers, touching his boyfriend. He dives into the crowd. Something, something, he's drunk, Tim. Come get air with me.

Tim knows damn well he can't GET drunk.

So obviously he better go take care of his Poor Drunk Boyfriend (ooooh nooooo).

Tim drags him to some side room the family uses. Before Kon can even get his hands under all those layers, he's sliding to his knees and swallowing Kon to the root. Fuck. It's EXACTLY what Kon needs. Hot and wet, cherishing and so damn eager. Absolutely milking him.

He cups that beautiful head and let's TTK slid down his body. Like hands stroking under clothes. Pinching and massaging his pecs. Rubbing his skin. Teasing his clit. Spreading him open for fingers to stretch and fuck. Kon can just lean back and enjoy the moaning. The eager rocking of Tim's mouth onto his cock.

Especially as the feeling turns from rubbing to fingers fucking into him. From fingers into toys. From toys into cock. Until Kon is spit roasting his Boyfriend all on his own. Making him whimper and twitch as he's rocked between two cocks, just how he likes it. Clinging to Kon and treated like something precious, head utterly empty, nothing but his next orgasm to worry about.

He whines when Kon pulls out of his mouth. But Kon promises he's just switching ends.

The best part? About using TTK during sex? Is they never need sex furniture. Kon can just bend Tim over thin air. Hold him there. So long as SOME part of him is touching Tim. Which, really, is an easy ask. And dragging down the probably ruined suit pants, Kon distantly notes soft steps approaching the door.

He slides home regardless. Grips those amazing hips and starts to pound. Tim desperately teasing his chest. Mouth open to be fucked by TTK cock, pouring out moans and fucked out cries. The wet squelch of their bodies meeting.

The footsteps have frozen. A reaction, muted. Almost... trained. Someone used to controlling their body. Oh my, oh my. It's the big perv.

The door's a crack. Not closing it, huh? So who are you staring at, Bat? Tim, your SON, as he gets fucked. Gasping and drooling, moaning for more, harder, deeper. Or Kon? The CLONE of your "best friend", a married man. As he fucks your son. Hips rolling, muscles lit with sweat, groaning in the pleasure takes from the body beneath him.

Which is the one you're getting off too, Batman? Tim? Him? Both of them? That's right, close the door and run. Kon can still hear you jerking it in the family wing.

Maybe Galas ARE fun.

As for Hood? Kon gets confronted. Because Jason can see the pattern developing and is self aware enough to Admit Some Stuff to Himself(tm). He WILL shoot you. And worse, he'll tell Tim. M.A.D. mother fucker.

Well, then. As long as he's aware Kon wants his spine as a mantle decoration. And he never, EVER makes a move on his Boyfriend. Yeah. Kon is willing not to torment him with glorious Tim Sex.

Great. Here's some coupons and gift cards to fancy ass date spots. Leave Jason to suffer his many mistakes in peace. The SECOND you are dead...

Ha! Tim will clone me. But THIS time, with my permission and adding his DNA so we have a Clone-Baby. Bart is husband number 2. None of you fuckers have a chance.

Suffer.

Like Kon said, he is a petty, Tim-loving, exhibitionist, bastard. He also now has date night plans! Sweet. Oooh. Fancy! This one's that new place with the waiting list. Nice.

-🐼🐼🐼

kon being a borderline exhibitionist and making sure to fuck tim in front of his family so they know exactly who he belongs to- and then them having planned out that if he dies bart will be tim's second husband so no one in his family can have him 😭😭😭

[olderthannetfic]

I wonder if that's more of a niche thing I happened to notice on my dash than a widespread phenomenon, but I kinda hate this trend of making fun of adult women who call themselves girls? Especially because it's always those angry, snarky one or two lines posts like "oh you think you're just some girl? well I'm NOT I'm a fucking adult woman so don't you fucking DARE call me that or I'm gonna fucking kill you" that just leave me like... okay? Has another woman actually referred to you as a girl or are you just deathly afraid they might start doing that if you allow them to call themselves girls? Also, are you sure that's a problem warranting that much rage and vitriol? Do their choices actually influence your life in any way? Is anyone trying to lure you into some creepy Girl Cult and you need help asap...?

Idk, it just sounds like yet another type of "well, I'm a Better Woman than you because I act like a Serious, Respectable Adult and only ever say, do, and think Serious, Age-Appropriate Things." Or another type of "I'm gonna blame other women who do something I don't agree with/don't like/think is stupid for somehow causing the oppression of all women."

Sometimes I think we just went from "you wear slutty clothes and like sex that makes me uncomfortable and that gives men the wrong idea, no wonder they think they can treat us all like objects" to, for example, "you think astrology is kind of a fun hobby with a fun history behind it?! Excuse me while I immediately affirm my superiority by copy-pasting that one Ursula Le Guin quote I got from another Tumblr post to establish myself as a Proper, Serious, Rational Woman Who Deserves To Be Treated As Well As A Man (Unlike You)."

... plus all the "I'm not one of those porn addict freaks on TikTok or one of those fandom-brained ship-obsessed creeps on here, I mock any and all smut and read CLASSICS" shit. But I think that's already touching on other issues. (Before anyone comes at me, I'm saying this as someone who ALSO reads Classics for fun. Even if I doubt that would make much of a difference to someone with that mindset, as any interest in fictional sex or romance besides pre-approved, wannabe-dark Gothic romance and sexy cannibalism that's "not REALLY about the sex or romance, I swear!!!!" is anathema to them.)

--

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

REWATCHING GO S1, LIVE PLAY-BY-PLAY OF DOOMSDAY WAHOO

HELLO MAGGOTS REWATCHING SEASON 1 BECAUSE THE FIRST TIME WAS A KIDNAPPING CHAOTIC MESS. EPISODE ONE HERE GOES. I DON'T REMEMBER A LOT OF DETAILS BUT YES.

Opening scene and Earth's got vibe-checked by God and I've been gaslit about the dinosaurs

GARDEN OF EDEEEEEN wow his first appearance and Aziraphale's already so prissy and flustered might fuck around and fall in love with him idk

I finally understand who these mf's are hi Hastur and Ligur you're not zombies after all

FOR FUCK'S SAKE SECOND SCENE CROWLEY'S BEEN IN AND SHE WALKED IN, SERVED HIPS HAIR AND CUNT, AND THEN MANAGED TO TALK HER AWAY INTO A PROBLEM

LIKE GENUINELY SHE COMES AND SASHAYS WITH HER HAIR AND SAYS TIMES ARE CHANGING AND HEAD OFFICE LOVES ME AND JUST INSTANTLY HASTUR AND LIGUR USE HER WORDS AGAINST HER

idk sister mary loquacious is kinda doing it for me rn with that satanic nun's habit and losergirl energy

third crowley scene and he's misplaced THE LITERALLY GODDAMNED ANTICHRIST because he made small talk with a bloke outside without checking for details

mmmmhm yes sister mary wink again your bitchless decisions are sexy y'know what i mean

Gabriel feels like his brain was eviscerated and replaced with one of those youtuber's paid course promos at the end of their how to change your life in 45 days: three simple mindset shifts video

so THIS IS WHY EVERYONE KEEPS SAYING PAVLOVIAN IN THIS FANDOM IT'S BECAUSE OF DUCKS of course it's because of ducks

mmmhm yes sure crepes French revolu--Crowley stop eye-fucking Aziraphale you're making everyone at the Ritz horny

Aziraphale don't moan into your food man you can't take these two anywhere

Crowley thanking the driver for slowing down is everything to me

And they're drunk hu-fucking-zzah good thing we'll have 11 year olds saving the world coz these fuckers sure ain't doing shit

OH MY GOD HE WAS TRYING TO SAY BOUILLABAISSE I JUST REALISED. I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST MAKING KISSY FACES AT AZIRAPHALE I'M NOT OK-

What Aziraphale was doing back was definitely kissy faces though that mfer wasn't even trying to say bouillabaisse when Crowley said what sounded suspiciously like baby

kissy kissy from lil miss prissy [i would have made such a great high school bully shame i had no inclinations that way]

SORRY WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK WAS THAT SOBERING UP EXCUSE ME THE FANFICS MADE IT SOUND LIKE IT WAS A CLICK AND THEY'RE SUDDENLY NORMAL WHY IS THE ALCOHOL REFILLING

oop nun down nun down

i want ya see a wile ya thwart amirite on a t-shirt

"actually i encourage humans to-" just say you're a lazy bitch azi we love you

love crowley fake-manipulating azi into helping like azi wants to be manipulated y'know so it's not technically his fault he was wiled over or whatever and they're both just such ENABLERS

not azi going SOFT at being godfathers with crowley

NOT BROTHER FRANCIS PLEASE NO FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS SACRED AZI WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS PLEASE

WARLOCKKKKK I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

HNNNG MICHAEL SHEEN HAD TOO MUCH FUN WITH THIS

why is nanny ashtoreth so seductive with that of course dear is it just crowley's inherent disastergirl sex appeal

HALF PONYTAIL CROWLEY I AM A FUCKING SLUT FOR HALF PONYTAIL

GASLIGHTING HEAVEN AND HELL THAT'S MY BABYGIRLS

erIC THE DISPOSABLE DEMON I DIDN'T KNOW THEY COME IN S1 well not come i hope unless being eaten by a hellho--nope

ANGEL CROWLEY SAID ANGEL ANGEL ANGEL

CROWLEY TRYING TO BE SUBTLE ABOUT KILLING BEFORE GETTING ANNOYED

waiter crOWLEY OUTFIT I CANNOT BE NORMAL AFTER THE WEDDING DRESS DESIGNING ABOUT THIS COSTUME

FOOLS WRONG BOY YOU FOOLS IM DEAD

DOG IS UNIRONICALLY SO CUTE EVEN BEFORE IT GOES SMOL

gonna give my roxie a kissy brb she's my angel and all this dog talk makes me miss her (she's a few feet away under the bed)

i asked her for a kissy and she crawled out and gave me a kiss i love her

DOGGGGG ADAMMM

...roxie's crying to be taken downstairs it's nearly 2 am this is on me for waking her up i crowley'd myself fml

EYYYYY WELCOME TO THE END TIMES don't mind me I'll have to take roxie down yes I know maggots I'm crowley-coded I KNOW THAT I'M A BLOODY DISASTER BYEEEEEEEE

[gyupinkys]

APRIL 12TH, 3:36PM

XU MINGHAO X YANDERE READER

WC: 2.7K

Minghao is hiding something from you.

You're hiding something from Minghao.

WARNINGS: MURDER, GORE, VIOLENCE, GUNS, WEAPONS, TOXIC RELATIONSHIP, MANIPULATION, YANDERE, unprotected sex, public sex, sex with a corpse in the room (yes this happened again idk how we got here), scary dirty talk?, this is just Y/N being insane.

Minghao is the light of your life. From the moment you first saw him on April 12th, at 3:36pm you were mesmerized. His all black attire, mullet, nails, everything; it did it for you. Of course he didn’t notice you, only because you didn’t want him to. Being able to blend in was a gift; you preferred to play in the shadows anyways. From that moment you tried to learn everything you could about him. The instagram and twitter searches oddly led to nothing and linkedin was a no go.  Hmmm, either he has no social media presence or doesn’t want to be found. Even after hours of digging you still find nothing. 

You decide to revisit the cafe you saw him at, maybe he’ll reappear. You can’t say you’re too shocked when he doesn’t. All you know is you need another taste of him, a sight of him, you need something, anything. 

“Excuse me.” you say to the worker behind the counter.

“Yes?” he says with an awful attitude, taking you aback.

“I think I lost my phone here a few days ago. Can I check the security cameras to see if someone stole it?”

“No.”

“What do you mean no?”

“I can’t show you them, lady.”

“Please.” you say batting your eyelashes at him and as always it works like a charm

“Maybe if you do me a favor, I’ll let you see.”

Gross. “Sounds like a plan” you smirk, trying not to throw up.

You follow him to the back to which he promptly pulls down his pants. You can’t help but laugh, his dick is so small. “What?” he says, sounding offended. “Nothing” you say and walk towards him. You pull out your trusty pistol and press it to his head. 

“Show me the tape.”

“You crazy bitch.”

That word always pisses you off. You’re not fucking crazy. You’re just passionate. 

“Shut the fuck up and show me the tape before I blow your fucking brains out.”

He immediately goes to the camera files and shows you the evening of April 12th. There he is. Your love. He somehow seems even more attractive. You sigh dreamily and the man next to you rudely interrupts to which you side eye him making him shut it. You take a copy of the file and erase the files from today in case this perv tries to go to the cops.

“Lovely doing business with you.”

You leave the cafe feeling like a teenager in love. He’s just so dreamy and you’re certain he’s sweet. As you rewatch the video on your phone you get an idea. Your friend Namjoon owes you one… hmm. If this is what it takes to find the man of your dreams so be it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You read the file left on your doorstep. Xu Minghao, 25, born on November 7, 1997, Chinese, 5’10, likes frogs? You fucking hate frogs, but If he likes them you like them. No occupation? He doesn’t look like someone who's broke. Maybe his parents are rich or something. Besides the basic information there's no current address, phone number, or information about school. This guy is basically a ghost.  How did they find out he liked frogs but not where he lives? You give Namjoon a call.

“Y/N.”

“Namjoon, why is there nothing about this dude?”

“He doesn’t want to be found for a reason.”

“Stop with the cryptic shit just tell me what his issue is.”

“Y/N I don’t think you want to know.”

“I swear to god.”

“He’s in the mafia. SVT. You don’t want to get involved with him.”

Oh. This does to deter you, if anything it makes you like him more. A dangerous man is a sexy man. You don’t want him if he can’t kill someone for you. 

“You gotta introduce us.” 

“No.”

“Why.”

“I did you your favor already. Plus I don’t approve of this.”

“How the fuck am I supposed to meet someone in the mafia on my own accord.”

“Y/N don’t act like you're not a criminal. You just pretend to be a good girl but we both know you’re not. I’m sure you’ll figure it you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He really likes tea. This is the third pack of tea he’s bought this week. Why not just buy more than one at a time? He walks through the aisles of the store like he always does, pretending to browse but knowing he’s just going to buy frog gummy bears. It’s the same thing every time. You pass by him and take a deep breath. He smells so good. You’re not sure how he hasn't noticed you yet. You’ve been a bit sloppy, trying to get as close to him as possible. He’s seen you walking around his apartment complex, at his favorite stores, at the park he meditates at, but he hasn’t seen you. You decide you’ve learned enough about him to finally approach him. As he’s about to leave the tea aisle you take this as your opportunity. 

“Excuse me” you say sweetly.

He turns around, seemingly shocked someone is speaking to him. 

“Yes?”

“Is that tea good?” you smile sweetly.

“Oh this? Yea it’s my favorite.”

“Hmm, maybe I should try it. I don’t really know much about tea.”

“I like to think of myself as a tea connoisseur,” he says with a kind smile. Perfect, he’s letting his guard down.

“Well lucky me, huh?”

“You’re blessed to be in the presence of an expert so yes, lucky you.”

He begins to go on and on about different types of teas, benefits, and a whole lot of other crap you’re not listening to. You just can't believe he’s speaking to you, looking at you, perceiving you. This must be heaven. 

“Can I ask your name?” you say as you two near the checkout.

He clearly weighs his options, deciding you seem innocent enough. 

“Hao.” he says, making you smile.

“Hi, Hao. I’m Y/N.”

From there you two “coincidentally” bumped into each other often. The interactions become friendlier and more comfortable. The smiles turned into longing eyes, small touches. You’ve eliminated any threats, any woman or man who looked his way too long had to go. You couldn't let anyone take you from him now that you had him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Baby, I need to go to work.” Hao whispers, trying not to disturb you too much. He knows you need your sleep, he has to leave at such weird times he feels bad. You’d think after a year of dating he’d have the balls to confess to you but he can’t. How are you supposed to tell your sweet, innocent, loving girlfriend you kill people for a living? He feels awful lying to you about his work, his life. You’ve been begging to meet his friends and family but he keeps denying you. He doesn't want to involve you in this lifestyle. You give him a tired smile and nod. “Ok, I’ll see you later.” you say and give him a kiss.

Minghao leaves your apartment and drives to the base. He has a few things to do today and then he can get back to you. He misses you already.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For someone in the mafia Hao is way too trusting and honestly kind of stupid. Did he not think sharing his location with you would be an issue? Of course the kind innocent girlfriend would never be watching his every move, checking street security cameras to watch what he does, who he talks to, what he looks at. You see he’s meeting a woman at a restaurant. The fuck? Does she want to die? They go into the restaurant and you lose sight of them. Without thinking you head to the restaurant. Just the thought of him talking to another woman infuriates you. He would never cheat on you, he’s too much of an angel and you’re sure if he did it wouldn’t be his fault. He was probably coerced or blackmailed, he would never do that. You speed to the restaurant and park a few blocks away. By now the sun has gone down and the streetlights have turned on. You wait for them to leave in the alley near the restaurant. They bid their goodbyes and Hao walks away after confirming his lady friend has a rise coming, always such a gentleman. Once he drives off the woman starts walking away; she must've lied. Unfortunate for her, great for you. You start crying in order to gain her attention. As she walks by you emerge.

“Excuse me.” you sob.

She looks at you bewildered. “Oh my goodness, are you alright?” she walks into the alley to get closer to you.

“Some girl tried to mug me and I’m waiting for the police. Can you come and wait with me, I want to make sure she doesnt leave.”

She immediately agrees and follows you deeper in. So gullible…

When she’s a little ahead of you, you reach into your back pocket and pull out the hammer you brought with you. 

“You think you can talk to my boyfriend and get away with it?”

She turns to look at you. “What? Minghao?”

“Yeup.”

“He’s dating you?” She says in disgust.

You just stare at her. She’s becoming increasingly uncomfortable and as she goes to walk past you, you swing the hammer into her face making her fall to the ground. You straddle her and beat her face in, hitting her over and over and over until the ground is covered in her skull and brain. You don’t stop until you hear movement behind you.

“Y/N?”

You freeze. He wasn’t supposed to see this. You stand up looking down at your pretty pink dress now stained red. You drop the hammer, ready to start crying. You’re searching for a story to tell him. Self defense always works right? 

He just starts laughing. You look up at him confused. 

“Baby, baby, baby. I didn’t know you had it in you.” he says as he begins walking towards you. He takes his chin in your hand and looks into your eyes. “Why did you kill her?”

You just pout, too embarrassed to answer. “Was it because I spoke to her? Were you jealous.”

You just nod, ashamed but not apologetic. “She had it coming. She didn't think I deserved you.”

“Do you deserve me?”

Your face falls. “I just killed someone for you and you’re asking if I deserve you?” you spit, letting the sweet persona drop.

“Y/N. Do you think I have not known what you really were this whole time? I’m not stupid. I know you're a psycho stalker. I saw you all those times before we started dating, I know you looked into me, I know you follow me around, track me. I know this is all a facade.”

You feel your world falling apart. This can’t be happening. He backs you into a wall. “Hao I just do it because I love you.”

“And I love you, but you fell for my trap baby. You can’t go around killing people.”

“But you do that all the time.”

He breathes out a laugh. “Well you got me there baby.”

“Wait, what trap?”

“I needed to prove my suspicions; catch you in the act. I was supposed to kill her, but I figured I'd use her as bait. And you're just so predictable. You just killed her with no remorse. You’re just crazy.”

You take a deep breath. You’re not fucking crazy. You look him in the eye. “I’m not crazy.”

“Well clearly I am, because seeing you kill that bitch turned me on.” 

“What?”

“You heard me. Seeing this pretty little dress I bought you covered in blood. God, It’s making me so hard.”

Well this is new. You go to speak only to be cut off by a rough kiss. He grinds his hips into you and he wasn’t lying he’s harder than ever. He begins kissing and biting down your neck, rubbing his hands across your blood soaked body. 

“If I tell you to kill someone else would you do it?”

“Yes” you immediately answer.

“Would you do anything for me?”

“Yes.” your breathing is picking up. He’s so close to you, you can feel his chest rise with every breath, his fingers tighten around your waist, everything. 

“You're just my little lap dog, huh? My every wish is your command?” you nod furiously as he sinks to his knees, hiking your legs on his shoulders. He bunches your dress on your hips and pulls your panties to the side. He dives in, eating you like his favorite food, the vigor and intensity driving you mad. “Hao, please fuck me I want to cum on your dick.” He groans, setting you down gently. 

“You want me to fuck you in this dingy alley? With people passing? What would look worse, them finding the body or them finding us covered in blood, fucking next to a body?”

You honestly dont give a fuck about either, all you want his his dick in you. “Hao please just fuck me.”

“I don’t know, Baby.”

“If you don't put your dick in me right now, I’ll show you how crazy I can be.”

He groans. He unbuttons his slacks and pulls his boxers down enough to pull himself out. He hikes you up the wall and pushes in, bottoming out immediately. “Fuckkk, just the thought that you killed someone just so you can have me is making me want to cum in this sweet pussy right now. But you deserve an award for being so good to me right?”

“Please. I deserve it.” you moan.

He begins thrusting into you, hard and deep, trying to make you cum. The feeling of his arms holding you, his body heat on yours, and the adrenaline running through your body, it’s all driving you crazy. He angles his hips upward, searching for the spot that drives you crazy. 

“Tell me, what was it about me that made me want you so much?” he whispers in your ear.

“You just- y-you looked so hot, and you sm- smelled so good and ughh.” Every word you say he thrust into you harder making you unable to get a full sentence out. He’s taunting you. “Do you not love me?” he says slowing down. “Is that what it is? You don’t want me?” 

“No, no I do! I want you so bad Hao.”

“I don’t think so.” he says as he puts you back on the floor. “I don’t think you love me as much as you say you do. You just want me because I’m pretty? You don’t really love me.”

“What do I need to do to show you? I’ll do anything Baby.”

“I want you to kill someone else for me. Get more blood on your hands.”

“Right now? Just tell me who, I’ll do it.” you start walking back towards the street to which he pulls you back.

“God, Baby. You don’t know what seeing you like this does to me. So obsessed with me that you’ll blindly follow what I say. This power is going to my head.”

You groan, feeling delirious. You just want to cum at this point and these games he’s playing is pissing you off. You reach into his suit pocket and pull out his gun pointing it to  his head.

“I may love you but I love cumming more. Get to it.”

“Yes Ma’am”

He presses your hands against the wall and slides back into you from behind. He starts pounding into you ruthlessly, you feel every ridge and vein of his cock. You want to scream, cry, laugh, anything. You feel like you’re genuinely losing your mind, so overwhelmed by everything you're feeling. You start crying only making him fuck you harder. 

“Cry for me baby, let me see all those pretty tears.” he groans in your ear.

His feral groan makes you cum, squeezing him so tight he slips out. He jerks himself off, cumming onto your ass with a quiet moan. You try to catch your breath. That was so intense, you still feel like you’re on a different planet. He turns you around and pulls you into his chest. His warm embrace grounds you like it always has. 

“I love you. You’re so good to me, Baby.” he says as he hugs you harder.

“I love you too, Hao. So much.”

You both step over the body, leaving the alley hand in hand.You look at him under the moonlight. As beautiful as the day you saw him but even more beautiful now that he’s yours. 

[jawabear]

Phone operator 

Captain John Price x Reader 

Not my GIF

A/N: this man makes me feel things. i listen to too many audios and this came out of my brain because of it. But tell me you wouldn't want to do this to the big sexy bear of a captain that is John Price? Sorry for any mistakes.

Genre: SMUT

Warnings: AFAB!reader, porn without plot, guided masturbation (m.reciving), breeding kink, daddy kink, British spellings, mention of naked photo, slight sub!price, Captain but erotically, phone sex

Summary: John is stressed about an evening dinner being thrown for him as the rest of the 141. His girl back home has the perfect way of getting him relaxed.

“Hey John, you okay?” 

John’s heart swelled and his shoulders sunk a bit at her voice down the phone. He had missed it. It had only been two days and he had gone for much longer but he needed to hear her again. 

“No. I’m not okay. I don’t want to go to this fuckin’ dinner tonight” he sat on the bed in a slump at the thought of having to socialise with stuck up board members and high ranking officers. 

“You sound like a child. Besides the guys will be there with you. It’s not like you’re going in alone” 

“They’re going to be no help. Probably going to get shitfaced and embarrass the lot of us” 

“John. That doesn’t sound like you. What’s going on?” 

John let out a sigh and rubbed over his face “I’m sorry I just…I really miss you and I’m so fuckin’ frustrated about tonight. I just wish you were here to come with me” 

“I wish I was there too. But I wouldn’t have been much use. You know I hate social events like that” 

“At least then I could use that as an excuse not to go. Then I would get to spend the night with you” 

“Oh? And what would that night include, Captain?”

“I think you know” he let out a long sigh “fuck, wish you were here. I fuckin’ need you, love. Need to feel you. To fuck you” 

She hummed and giggled a little “I can tell you what I would do if I was there. If that would help” 

“Yes. Yes it would help a lot” he could feel himself getting hard just from the thought of her whispering dirty little things down the phone to him. 

“How about then, seeming as you’re so frustrated and pent up, I instruct you on how to make yourself feel good. Just like if I were there. How does that sound?” 

“Like…touching myself?” 

“Yes. If you want to. I just want to help you feel good, Captain” 

He huffed a little “okay. Go for it” 

She cleared her throat and let out a breath. “Okay. I need you to be completely naked and lay down on the bed for me. On your back” 

Luckily he was only wearing a towel from the shower. It didn’t take much for him to remove it, drop it to the floor and lay down on the bed. “I’m laying down” he told her. 

“Put me on speaker and put the phone by your head on the pillow. You’re going to need both hands” he did as she told him and was now laying flat with his hands by his side. Completely exposed to the room. It felt…hot. 

He felt incredibly sexy laying there with her telling him what to do. But he felt a little strange at the fact she couldn’t see him. 

“Now, slowly and slight stroke up and down your chest. Very very lightly. Barely even touching yourself” he swallowed thickly and let out a breath before trailing his touch fingertips over his chest. His chest hair was soft under the light touch and it made him feel tingly. He could imagine it being her. How her soft fingers roamed up and down his body. Making him shiver and making him harder with every touch. 

“Does that feel good?”

“Yes. Feels…really nice” he whispered. She hummed again. 

“Now move one hand to your inner thigh. I know how you like it when I touch your thighs. How it makes your cock throb” he groaned at her words and the soft tone of her voice. He hated though how muffled it sounded through the phone. He would have to get her to do this when he got back. 

John gently moved his hand down to his left inner thigh and gently stroked his skin. He let out an embarrassing whimper that made her laugh on the other end “good boy. Feels so good to touch yourself doesn’t it? Right where it feels good” 

“Yeah…” 

“Do you want to touch your cock for me? Is it hard? So hard that it hurts? I bet it’s the prettiest shade of red for me. The tip so swollen and desperate to be touched” 

“Yes. Yes it is, (Y/N). I’m so fuckin’ hard for you. Want to touch it” he panted, his head rolling back against the pillows as he inched his hand closer and closer to his cock. 

“Not just yet baby” she whispered, slight humour to her voice. She was enjoying his desperation clearly “just a little longer. Trust me. Good things come to those who wait, my love” he groaned again “switch hands. Touch your other thigh. And this time, play with those sensitive nipples for me. I know you love it when I touch them. That make you come so quickly and it makes you such a submissive ness for me” 

John’s cock twitch at the thought of her kissing his nipples. She was right, they were sensitive. Embarrassingly so. A sure fire way to get him coming quickly when she wanted him too. She knew his body too well. It drove him mad that she wasn’t there to fuck him. 

But he touch his nipples. His thighs shaking. “I love when you try to act all big and tough. Even though you know I’ll ruin you. My big strong Captain, nothing more than a needy submissive baby for me” 

“Oh fuck” he swore quietly. He felt like he was coming. His head was spinning and a burning hot pleasure coursed through his body. He had to look down to check he hadn’t come yet. He hadn’t, but his cock was angry red and twitching. Hard against his stomach. A trail of pre come connecting his cock to his abdomen. “Want to come. Wanna touch myself baby. Please” 

“Just a little more, Captain. Then I promise you can come as much as you like” her voice was low but sincere. He knew she wouldn’t be too cruel to him and deny him his pleasure. At least, he hoped she wouldn’t. “I just want you to lightly circle the tip. Get your fingers nice and wet with your come” 

John move his fingers from his thighs to his aching cock. His fingers trembling a little as he ghosted them over his leaking cock head. He grunted and moaned when he allowed himself a touch. His fingers collecting the wetness there and stimulate his cock. “Fuck feels so good. So fucking wet and hard for you” 

“I bet it is” she said “bet your balls are nice and heavy with come aren’t they?”

He moved his hand from his nipples and cupped his balls. They were heavy and tender. He almost shot his load when his hand made contact. “Yeah. So full…” 

“I bet it would feel good to let it all out wouldn’t it? To come all over yourself. Make a mess of that perfect fucking body of yourself” he bit down harshly on his bottom lip to try and suppress the pathetic moans and whimpers trying to get out. “Would feel so good if you came inside me. Shooting all that hot come inside me. Breeding my pussy. Making me a mummy. And you a daddy” 

“Oh fuck! Fuck! Stop talking like that! Gonna make me come before I’ve even touch myself properly!” She laughed again. Her voice was hot and full of teasing. She could keep him on the edge all day and would once even need to touch him with a voice like that. 

“But that’s what you want isn’t it? To fill my pussy with your come?” 

“Yes! Yeah I want it! Fuck want to make you a mummy! See you get all nice and round with my baby! Fuck your pregnant pussy! Fuck all my come into you!”

“Touch yourself. Come for me John” he wrapped his hand round his cock and pumped it like there was no tomorrow. He didn’t care about holding back his noises anymore. He just wanted to come. “Think of my pussy. Think of how good it would look dripping with you come. I wouldn’t be able to hold all of it in my pussy. You’d have to push some in my arse. Or my mouth. Use me as your personal cumdump. That sound good?”

“Fuck!” He bellowed “I’m going to fuck you so hard when I get back! You’re not gonna be able to walk when I’m done with you! You’ll take it all! All of it into every one of your perfect holes!”

“I’ll be waiting for it” she whispered. He could almost feel her breath on his ear. “You’ll be such a great daddy. You already are to me. My big strong Captain daddy. And all his delicious come..” she seemed to swoon of the other other of the phone. He wondered if she was also touching herself. But he didn’t have the capacity to for the words to ask. All he could do was moan, groan and grunt out her name.

“Come for me daddy” she whined “come for me. Breed me!”

He let out a loud swear as he came and came. Fuck he couldn’t stop coming. Shooting it out in thick ropes all over his chest. “Fuck. (Y/N)! I can’t-“ he panted and whined as his head fell to the bed “can’t stop”

“Don’t. Don’t stop, hunny. Keep coming ‘til you can’t anymore. Let it all go” he kept pumping his shaft, moaning and grunting as he did. His hips bucking up into his hand and his thighs shaking at the overstimulation. But it felt too good to stop. But soon he had milked himself dry and hand to pull his hand away before he passed out. 

“That’s it” she soothed him. Her voice just above a whisper. “Just like that. Relax, hunny. Relax and feel all the pleasure lingering” 

He couldn’t definitely feel it. That was for sure. He wouldn’t stop feeling it for a while. “You did so well. I told you good things come to those who wait” he could heard the smirk in her smug voice. An ‘I told you so’ look probably plastered all over her perfect face. 

John let out one final long breath before he could speak again “I love you. You’re so good to me. Thank you. I really needed that”

“My pleasure. Well actually it was yours but your pleasure is my pleasure” he laughed a little. “Do you really feel better? Or are you just saying that?”

That was one thing that always baffled him about her. How quickly she could go from threatening to ruin him, to panicking over if she did it right. Her confidence always faded all too quickly.

“I feel so much better than I have in a while. Probably still be feeling it when I go to this dinner. Maybe it will make it more bearable. Speaking of, I should probably be getting ready. Might need another shower though now”

“Why can’t you just walk around covered in your own come?” She teased “you make me walk around covered in your come…”

“Minx” he muttered “I’ll just give myself a wipe down then. Compromise” 

“Okay. But before you do, take a picture. I want to see the mess you made over your chest. So I can get off to it later. I’m already wet as it is” 

“Do you need me to make you come?”

“Yes I do. But you haven’t got long ‘til the dinner so I’ll make do with staring at your fucking perfect come covered chest tonight. Maybe tomorrow it can be my turn?”

“Anything you want beautiful. And when I get back, I am going to fuckin’ ruin you” he promised that. She could hear the finality in his voice and it made her feel all fuzzy. She had definitely soaked her panties now. 

“I’m counting on it. Until next time, Captain” 

2/1/23

[armpirate]

Anti-romantic || JJk | Ch. 7

Pairings: Boxer!Jungkook x fem!reader || Enemies to lovers, neighbors

Genre: smut, angst, fluff, curse, illegal boxing, violence

Warnings: fuckboy!Jungkook x reader, smut, dirty talk, curse, mention of tarot and fate

Summary: Jungkook had always been carefree when it came to love. He always believed he was worth sharing himself with everyone, and thought it was selfish of him to ever think of keeping himself exclusive to just one person.

And maybe that was exactly what got him into the big problem he was in.

A curse that kept him away from love didn't seem an issue for him. The fact that his ex-girlfriend thought he'd be affected by the idea of the girls he slept with running away from him after sex was ridiculous. She actually did him a favor, and took a burden away from him.

At least that was what he thought at first.

He had never found himself thinking of the possibility of repeating with neither of his hook ups, because they disappeared before he was able to even think about it. But when he makes the mistake of sleeping with the sexy neighbor that lives in front of him, he finds himself hoping to get the chance for a second round every time their paths cross.

Y/n hated him the second he set foot inside the building by the way he started making her life a miserable mess for no reason. Sleeping with him was a big mistake she wasn't thinking of repeating. At least not until he came up with the excuse that she rejected him for a curse. Not only she thought he was annoying, but she was also convinced he was crazy. 

There was no way she could take him seriously.

Aprox. time of reading: 18 minutes

Chapter warnings: smut, protected sex, masturbation (female and male receiving), dirty talk

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

His laugh was dying to come out and interrupt whatever it was she had going on up there, jumping on the bed while purposely moving the headboard against their shared wall. Instead, Jungkook sneaked his hand inside the pocket of his pants to reach for his phone, turning up the camera to have physical proof of what was going on in front of him. It most certainly would be useful in the future, at least for some good laughs.

All the teasing jokes going through his head were only eclipsed by the effect her fake moans were having under his pants. His shaft throbbed just at the thought of how she'd sound under him, desperate for him, craving for more, to the point of being unable to hold back all those same moans she was forcing to let out.

—I'm almost there.

Her voice sounded suffocated -something that didn't really surprise him by the cardio she was doing up there.

—Almost where? —he inquired, unable to hold back the comment.

Those words resonated in her eardrum, making her slow on the way she moved the headboard and slowing her jumps.

That damned hole made it seem as if the annoying prick of her neighbor was in the same room.

—To the ceiling? I bet if you jump a little bit higher you'll make it —he mocked her.

Y/n slowly turned, looking over her shoulder and losing balance, falling back on the bed, when she spotted Jungkook leaning against the door frame while she felt her face breaking down along with a short scream that came from the deepest part of her throat.

—Next step the Olympics —his thumb raised, along with that mocking smile on his face.

—How did you get in here? —she spoke so fast he barely caught up with what she said.

That wasn't really the main worry in her brain, but she needed something to hide the fact that she was deeply embarrassed.

—The real question is: what was that? —Jungkook giggled, moving his finger in the air to point out what he had witnessed.

—No, the real question is: do you know you're committing a crime by breaking into my house?

Her position quickly changed from that weird pose she was left at after falling to being kneeling on the bed in a defensive way.

—The door was open —Jungkook pointed back at him.

—It's still housebreaking, you dumbass.

But he wasn't intimidated by her, who would be at that moment?

Jungkook ignored her, crossing his arms over his chest while his head tilted to the side, looking down at Y/n with a funny look that ran over her body.

—Don't switch the topic, 3A. Were you trying to make me jealous?

Y/n could only scoff at that question, not even understand how his brain worked to get to that conclusion.

—Do you even hear yourself when you speak?

—Ah, sorry. Could be my ears are still ringing by those moans.

As Jungkook laughed, Y/n got the closest thing she had to her, which unfortunately was a pillow -she hoped the charger or something that was thrown at his head would actually split it open. And, even then, he caught it before it could even reach his face, peeking his head over it to keep teasing her.

—I swear if you don't leave my apartment in five seconds, I will...

—What? Will you send me to the moon with those Bugs Bunny jumps?

—No, I will kick your ass so bad that what happened the other night would seem like a playground fight —Y/n warned him.

—Going back to those moans —he again ignored what she had just said—, who fucked you so bad that that was your best at faking it?

Y/n scoffed, rolling her eyes at that comment, but standing there without doing anything for some reason. She could be kicking him out, she could be punching him on that annoying face he was making, but she just stood there, crossing her arms over her chest to mirror his pose.

—I could make that up though.

—I'm not touching you with a stick —she spat back, stepping closer to him—. Now get out of my house.

—You're looking hot right now, I'm going to stay a bit longer.

He had to be playing her, because there was no way someone found it so funny to be testing her limits that way.

—I bet the neighbors will love to see who's the one starting problems next time you try to complain about me.

—It's your word against mine. Think again.

—But I have proof.

Y/n frowned, looking confused and feeling her guts shrinking at the mention of proofs to back up his words. And she felt like disappearing when he played the video in her face, never thinking it would come a day where she saw herself and thought how pathetic she actually was.

In a desperate attempt, she tried to reach for his phone, but it only made things worse for her, having Jungkook moving faster to keep the cell away from her hand and taking advantage of the situation to cage her between the wall and his body.

—You have no idea how bad I want to sink your face with a punch right now.

—And you have no idea how bad I want to fuck you.

It was the third time he was that close to her, enough to be filling up her nostrils with a fresh scent mixed with the musky smell of his cologne.

—I'll repeat myself in case you didn't understand: I wouldn't touch you...

—Who said you needed to touch me?

The moment those words left his lips, Y/n was convinced she was ready to do the biggest stupidity of her life, feeling her body a bit heavier when she stopped hearing her own annoying voice after he hid his phone inside his pants.

If she played along, Jungkook would probably end up distracted enough for her to snitch his phone away and delete that video that was already giving her nightmares without sleeping.

His nose rubbed against hers, while his breath coated her mouth, making her move instinctively back. She had that smirk plastered on her face, while both of her hands stayed on his chest, assuring a safe distance in a situation that didn't seem real for her.

—Enough of the joke —she said nervously.

—I'm not laughing.

Jungkook pecked her lips, so softly and so gently that Y/n didn't see it coming. His lips fell off hers lightly, like a feather, and that left her hoping for more. Not really hoping, because her body reacted faster than her brain, grabbing him by the neck when he was about to step back. Softness disappeared right at the beginning of that kiss, having Jungkook pinning her body against the wall, eating up her gasp after the impact.

All the hate she had been saving up for him only those weeks turned into a lustful ball that kept growing inside of her, till the point of her being convinced it would explode at any time. And she only needed the fast friction of his front teeth against hers, when she opened her mouth to let his tongue in, to turn against her own self. Mint and cigarettes, that'd be the description of her weakness at that moment. While Jungkook finally found himself able to enjoy her taste, feeling the sweet flavor from her tongue get to the deepest side of his brain, thinking he'd get addicted to it if he just kissed her a little bit more. Her spongy lips felt better than he could've ever imagined whenever she popped in his head, sucking on his in such a sensual way he was sure he'd fall to his knees right then.

One second to breathe, and the powers were switched again. His hands left the receptive position they had occupied for a few minutes to move to her jaw, with his fingers enclosing around the sensitive skin to feel the moves of her muscles against his fingertips. That position didn't last long though. Her digits tucked tight on his oversized t-shirt, making them turn to pin him against the wall.

Her teeth trapped his lower lip, pulling from it until it let go sloppily, back to its position. And it only got better when she heard that groan, that Jungkook didn't manage to hold back, when her hands slipped inside his t-shirt. If there was any trace of regret going through her head, it disappeared when she felt his well-formed abs against the tip of her fingers, able to tell apart every muscle just by touching him.

Jungkook pulled her closer, wrapping his big hands around her hips and being delusional enough to think that grinding his growing bulge against her lower belly would get her to be easy on him and leave all that teasing, but it only made it worse. Her lips kept rubbing against his, moving away every time he tried to move forward to kiss her, while her hands wandered down his torso to find the elastic of his black sweatpants.

Her nipples tightened under the fabric of her black dress when she first palmed his length, eager to see how he'd look completely naked in her bed. It was an image that kept repeating in her head whenever she felt needy for somebody's touch, and that increased after she managed to see the shape of his boner under his boxing shorts after that illegal fight. His fingers held her tighter when she started stroking him over his clothes, making him feel a little bit closer to paradise by that touch only.

In revenge, his palm cupped her clothed pussy, groaning when he felt how wet and sticky the underwear was as he moved his fingers through her slit. Unlike her, he didn't play around. He moved the fabric aside, managing to coat the tip of his index with her arousal, getting a painful throb on his core just when he imagined how easily it'd be to pound in and out of her.

—Let me see those tits —he asked, flicking his fingers on her clit.

Her skin was already burning before he said that, but the lust reflected in his black eyes and the raspy voice in that sentence alone turned her blood into flaming lava. Her hands reached for the straps of her dress, feeling the short circuit of her brain as it started being only focused on the way his fingers moved slowly on her throbbing button, while his other hand lifted the skirt to be able to grab the flesh of her ass cheek.

The first vision of her perked breasts and hard nipples had him twitching inside his boxers, letting his body give in to its impulses when she stood like that in front of him. The little space she had settled between them to tease him disappeared again, when Jungkook pulled her closer by her hips. His mouth took one of her nipples, letting it get harder in his warmness, feeling how the hard tip fought against his flat tongue, before he let go of it with a loud sound and moved onto the other.

Her fingers sank in his hair, encouraging him to keep going, before she spat on her hand and moved to the inside of his pants. His groan vibrated through her chest when Y/n wrapped her fingers around him, quietly moving them up and down while she coated his length with her saliva, feeling how thick and hard he was getting against her palm.

—I really need to fuck you —he groaned, biting on her chest before he was towering over her again—. I really, really need it.

Y/n stood on her tiptoes, while her hands let go of him. Her lips rubbed against his, while her hands played with the elastic of her panties.

—Do it.

Never two words had sounded as challenging as those, making him feel like he actually had something to prove to her.

Redirecting his face by his nape, she linked their lips together, while her other hand managed to lower his pants enough. Jungkook found himself multitasking, kicking his sneakers away at the same time he helped her take off his pants. He didn't care about the phone, or the keys. The sound they made as they reached the ground seemed like blank noise for him, too focused on the way her lips tasted and how she kept grinding her belly against him.

Jungkook started that kiss, sure he'd be the one in control of the situation, but Y/n proved him wrong when she pulled him by the t-shirt and made them turn, helping him walk backwards until they reached her bed.

—You sure you want to do this? I'm warning you it might be too much for you.

His comment instantly made her roll her eyes, moving the only clothing on him disappear as she moved it up his torso. He was only wearing the piercings on his ears and lips, and that silver chain, but still asked her as if she wasn't the one leading him for the most part.

—I see you're still a bit lost —her head tilted to the side—. I think you're the one who will struggle to handle me.

After saying that, she pushed him to the bed, making Jungkook fall suddenly over the mattress and having the furniture underneath squeaking at the sudden movement. When he saw her moving to the side, he thought that she'd probably do the same thing she did the last time and leave him hanging like that, but instead she reached to the nightstand and went back to him with a squared wrapping on her lips as she tried to open it.

—Put it on —she demanded, throwing the open wrapped to his belly.

She watched Jungkook wrapping his cock with the condom, feeling a bit too hypnotized by how the latex moved down his shaft while her fingers fought with the zip until she managed to move it down and take her dress off.

As soon as her knee sank on the bed, he made the attempt of guiding her to lay, although the palm on his chest stopped him from being able to change his position.

—Didn't you want me to ride you?

That sentence alone made his dick twitch in the air in excitement, eager to see her working him to their high. But, of course, she always had to do the opposite of what he wanted. As she placed her legs on each side of him, he gave up on the idea of seeing her tits bouncing in sync with the movements of her hips, although the curves of her body and her back beautifully on display for him probably had the same effect.

His cock was trapped between her belly and her hand, while her fingers gave soft strokes on the length and stopped right when the tips reached his balls, making his body squirm under her and his hips raise with neediness.

—Are you like this already? —she teased him, looking at him over her shoulder— What was all the handle talk, then?

—I'm just trying to hold back of pinning you against the bed and fuck you.

And while it wasn't entirely a lie, he indeed was squirming and trembling over her touch, reacting ahead of himself.

Y/n finally moved, lifting her hips and redirecting his tip to her entrance, moving down just enough for the tip barely sliding inside. With his warning grunt, her hips moved lower, as slow as possible, making him a witness of how smoothly his dick disappeared inside of her until it was completely gone. Y/n felt it stretching her out slowly, inch by inch, until she was completely molded around him, letting out a soft sigh that combined with his heavy breathing.

Her movements were slow and deep at first, milking every bit of patience out of him. She leaned over his legs, supporting herself on his ankles. And he knew then she knew exactly what she was doing. From his position, he could see how his cock disappeared between her walls every time she moved down, and how it came out coated in her arousal every time she moved forwards.

She was a bigger tease than he was.

Hearing a moan crack in the middle of his groans and sighs was the only thing she needed to go back to the first position, calmly rocking her hips up and down while she tried to keep her balance with the palms supported on his lower torso.

Jungkook held both of her hands, helping her to keep her back arched as her body jumped on him, feeling every inch of his cock rub against her insides like she had only imagined until that night. Although that grip didn't last enough for him. He noticed how much she hated being restrained in any sense, soon moving her hands away from him to place them on her thighs.

Y/n was keeping him from seeing her parted lips while silent whines came out of them, with that pleased expression on her face, or how her whole body moved in sync with her hips, just like her hair created some subtle waves. But he was also kept from seeing her playing with herself, reaching that level of pleasure where everything felt a little bit too less than needed. And that was exactly what had him moving his hips up, unable to hold back from moving underneath her power because he just wanted more. He wanted to lift her hips just enough to be able to fuck into her while he supported himself on her shoulders, high enough to even close his fist on some of her locks.

—Fuck it.

She heard those two words, before she felt him pulling her body down until his chest was covered by her back. His legs flexed at the same time his hands moved to the back of her knees to spread them and raise them almost at the level of her chest.

—My turn now, honey.

She thought those words would help her get ready for what was to come, but nothing could ever prepare her for the way his dick drilled against her in that position. He was fast, rough, as if he wanted to get back to her for torturing him until that moment, as if he was pounding those three weeks of frustration and arguments into her.

It went from 0 to 100 so fast that her only way of processing it was letting out all those moans she had tried to fake before he sneaked inside her apartment, only interrupted by a short moment when he accidentally pulled out.

—How does it feel? —he asked, letting go of her to plug himself back inside.

But Jungkook pounded into her before she was able to answer, too worried of slipping away by the way his hips collided against hers, and that were exposed by the loud claps of their thighs after every thrust, as she held onto the sheets at the top of their heads.

He smirked to himself when he looked down at her, completely fuck out like he wanted her to be, controlling her breathing through her parted lips, forcing her own self to be vocal about how much she liked what she was doing to her, visually getting drunk of her while her walls hugged around him.

—Look at you. With how much you like talking, and you can't even say a word right now —his fingers squeezed her flesh—. That's how fuck out I make you feel.

Those words activated a new need in her, as she felt closer to her high. With one hand securing her stability, the other hand flew to her swollen clit, moving her fingers in circles along with the speed of his thrusts, making herself whine louder.

—I'm so close —she warned him.

And even if she hadn't told him anything, he could tell she was closer to cumming with each thrust by the way she kept clenching desperately around him.

—Are you cumming, too?

—Fuck, yes —he growled.

One more sway of his hips, one more twitch of his cock and they were both done and ruined with a prolonged moan. Jungkook thrust deeper one last time as he spilled himself inside the condom, before he finally pulled out.

All the muscles that had been tense all the way there, finally relaxed once they reached their highs, allowing them to feel like floating when Jungkook was aware back again of the mattress and Y/n was aware that she was still on top of his body.

Her body fell flat next to his, shaky breathing fighting to go back to normal as she stared at the ceiling. It was all so calm and silent, that she allowed herself to close her eyes, trying to remember the way it felt like her hairs would leave her skin by the way they raised through her orgasm.

All that peace lasted a few minutes only, because soon she felt the mattress moving and she heard his steps over the room. When she opened your eyes, she found him looking for some of his clothes, while the rest were piled in his hand.

Y/n wasn't sure what she expected, or whether she actually wanted him to stay or not, but she was confused at how fast he was getting ready to leave.

—You're leaving?

—Yeah —he answered, simply.

He lived next to her, there was no need for him to spend the night there. But something in the way he acted rubbed her the wrong way, having her sitting up on the bed.

It wasn't like she'd have wanted him to sleep next to her either. Maybe it was her hurt pride speaking through her, calling her out after being brought back to reality. And that reality was that she made the mistake of sleeping with her neighbor.

—And that's it?

For a brief moment, Jungkook looked confused at her question. What else was he supposed to say or do?

—Yeah. I got what I wanted, you got what you wanted. We're done —he nodded—. You didn't expect us to cuddle and giggle like dumbasses, did you?

No, but she didn't discard that idea either. Somewhere in the back of her brain, while she had her eyes closed, she hoped he'd wrap his arms around her and pull her in for a hug. Although maybe that was her loneliness projecting a bit too much. It wasn't like she was hoping for him to promise her the stars and the moon, but at least some aftercare that didn't make her feel like a piece of meat?

—No, but this isn't it either —she called him out—. You can't go around treating people like this.

—Well, it seems like a you problem —he shrugged—. I didn't do anything to give you hope for a relationship.

And that phrase alone made her scoff.

—Hold it back there, who the fuck talked about a relationship? I'm just talking about human decency, which seems to be a bit too much to ask for a dog like you —she grimaced at her own words—. No, sorry. I didn't mean to insult dogs.

—It's cute you're bitter for this. It's okay —he mocked—. Where can I throw this away?

When she looked down, she could see he was referring to the latex that had a knot at the top so nothing would leak. It was the last thing she needed to trigger her anger to act up.

—Get out —she demanded.

Y/n didn't give him time to say anything else, or keep mocking her for her reaction, she pushed him out of her bedroom until they reached the door.

—Hope the door kicks you on the balls —she muttered, giving him one final push outside before she slammed the door.

Jungkook just stood there, looking at her door for a few seconds until he finally shrugged, calmly walking to his apartment. While she huffed and felt her blood boiling at the sight of her messy bed, only thinking of changing her sheets and going for a fast shower before she tried to sleep. Although not even then she'd be allowed to get some rest, because her brain casually reminded her she forgot to get his phone to delete the video he had shown her.

Jungkook was a walking nightmare.

Taglist: @jk97bam @ttanniett

[soft-persephone]

A Guide to Proper Communication/Best He Could Do: (Totally Intentional)

Nick Miller x Black!Fem!Reader // Nick Miller x Fem!Reader

WC: 3.8k! // MDNI // More Nicky Nick // Masterlist

Warning: Sex. Explicit themes. Maybe not the best communication skills.

Again, I wrote this with a black women in mind, but everyone is welcome to read it! I hope you enjoy! (Gif from @clintbartons )

Nick smiled a little once he made his way into the hotel. He didn’t have the best type of phone for you to text him the address with a link or web-something like that. He didn’t know much about “smart phones”.

He also didn’t trust it.

And he was not going to GPS himself there either. He had a brain and maps still worked, so why would he ever need a voice in a box to replace something that already exists! 

It’s that exact human laziness that got humanity to where it is now. No more hard working, adaptable, and resourceful people. No more basic human decency or connection. 

Just convenience and technology.

Needless to say, they had their first fight. 

Studpid? Yes.

But somehow he found it in him to give her an email. . . It was for emergencies. A last minute resort, only to be used when needed.

He wasn’t that stupid.

“Hello, sir?” The nice lady at the front desk  smiled brightly, “are you checking in? Visiting someone perhaps?”

“I’m here for the uh, the law or business conference thing.” He fought the urge to cross his shoulders or look as uncomfortable as he felt. “It should have started maybe half an hour ago.”

“Oh, yes sir! It’s right this way!”

Nick followed her from a polite distance until he knew for sure he had the right place.

It was done up to the nines. Probably the fifth fanciest place he’d ever been. He’s seen hotels like this in so many cities but never dared to dream he'd even think about actually being inside of one.

“Nick!” 

You were as gorgeous as ever. Even more than the last time he saw you. 

He was not an expert in the ups and downs and trends of female fashion, but he’d say you looked amazing. As sexy as someone could get at a work function with mostly men. That maybe you're wearing something to push the boundaries as far as you can before someone could label you inappropriate or pull you to the side and say you were making the rest of the men uncomfortable. 

“Excuse me miss,” he smiled, “but I came here for the business event this evening and not for a celebrity party or gala. Could you point me in the right direction?”

You laughed with your whole body, turning away from him and covering your mouth. He'd say he loved the way it sounded, but when you laughed he only heard bells ringing.

“You're too much.”

You cupped both sides of his face and looked into his eyes, making his heart drop and his chest swell. Just being close to you overwhelmed him with emotions he couldn't even begin to explain. 

“What are you doing?” he chuckled through his nose with a huff, “You just gonna stand there and hold my face  like a weirdo or are we gonna go inside?” He chuckled before licking his lips. “I mean, either way, I don’t mind. . . We’ve just been here for quite a while.”

“I- I’m just so happy to see you,” you averted your eyes for a second and looked away momentarily before looking him in the eye again, “in person.”

You were gazing into him so deeply, eyes searching and exposing every naked part of him for who he is and what he could be. He wasn’t sure what you'd find after looking at him for so long, but he was scared of all the possible things that might be.  

Would you want to be with him once you've seen it all?

He settled on a, “it's good to see you too.” he chuckled lowly. “In person.”

He’d be damn if he’d tripped over his own feet to get to  you. He couldn't do that to himself. . or you. Not this time.

Some serious looking man pops up and calls your name.

“I'll be there in a sec!”

You smiled at him again, instead of holding his face you chose to clasp both of his hands into yours.

“I am so excited for tonight!”

“So am I.” He gave you a few finger guns. Why? He's not sure, but he's rocking with it. At this point he has no choice but to act like it's normal.

“They aren't going to let significant others of any kind into the business side of things because of the incident that happened last year, so you’ll have to stay in this specific area.”

Nick’s mind was blank. He didn't wait so long for this night just to be shoved off into a corner.

“Yeah, no,” he shrugged it off. What's a few more days compared to a few more hours? If that, even! It's a work thing, right? Go work! Ole Nicky will be just fine!”

One more blessed smile and you were gone. 

The night was hell. . .

The drinks were as decent as a business function could manage, but what really grated his nerves were the women he was surrounded by. At first he thought about it in a practical manner.

You worked in a male dominated field, so of course he’d be surrounded by a bunch of women in the significant other –and ‘others’ section. 

These women were as ditsy as they come. . . or the most elaborately decorated pieces of cardboard. Pretty, but they were bored and disinterested. However, it was clear why they were here.

“Oh my God,” some not genuine red hed practically screamed in his ear, “so are you like an escort for the one woman here?”

“Don't be stupid,” her friend chided, “He's clearly her LA Bae!” 

He gave his best forced fake smile and took a sip of his beer, leaving them to a hissy fit of their giggles.

The annoying questions, the alcohol, and the lingering boredom were all adding to the slow simmering fire of the rage building up inside of him.

Is this what you thought of him? Was your relationship even real or was he just someone you met up with anytime you were in LA because otherwise you’d be lonely and bored. He wasn't against anything casual or fun, but the longer he stays in this stupid corner, the more it becomes clear to him what he wants you to be in his life.

He wants something real with you.

All the times you both spent video chatting, him asking  you what you wanted. . .

The way you never gave an answer, or changed the subject in a way where you  started to answer, but ultimately never really answered the question. . . 

He hated that the most.

Whatever it may be, he wanted you to say it. You owed him that much. 

“Nick!” You called again that night, not for the last time. 

“Hey.” He tried his best to not look upset, but he’s known for having a pretty sucky best effort. He  tried to make his tight-lipped smile as polite as possible, but that only did so much when his arms were crossed tightly against his chest. The beer in his hand dangling idle at his side.

You paused but only for a split second, blinking past the tension before smiling up at him.

“Hey!” You placed both hands on his shoulders before moving them up and down his arms. 

“It’s finally over! We are free to do anything we want now!”

Nick watched a blonde walk arm and arm with a considerably older man, giggling in his ear as they made their way into an elevator where the man not so subtly slid his hand up her considerably short dress. 

Is this it?

This can’t be it.

Fuck it.

“I was thinking we could go get a late dinner” you started, “or we could keep it lowkey and get a drink at a bar somewhere? Maybe head back to the hotel I'm staying at?” your hands glided across his chest before meeting at his back as you took a step closer. 

“No.”

Your brows furrowed

“What do you mean no? Nick what’s–”

“Is what we have real?”

“Of course what we have is real!” you scoffed, “Where is this–”

“--no!” Nick shouted and slammed his beer on the nearest surface. 

“No.” he said again more firmly, taking a step closer to you. “Why did you invite me here? Why invite me to something if we aren’t actually going to get to talk or spend real time together?”

“Ni–”

“--are you embarrassed by me?” he yelled. “Is that it?”

“Why the fuck would I be embaressed of you Nick?” you yelled back, waving your hands around with as much fervor as he was. You both had to be looking like complete fucking asholes. “If I'm embarrassed to be seen around anyone, it would be Derik!” you huffed.

 “I like you. . . because you aren’t him! Y- you're nothing like him. . . nothing.” your voice broke a little at the end and Nick couldn’t help but feel a little bad. But the little voice in his head told him to be selfish, and all he wanted to do at the moment was listen to it.

“It's not enough.” he crossed his arms and pursed his lips. 

“It's not enough?” you said incredulously. “When is it going to be enough Nick? What the fuck else do you even want me to do? I–”

“--prove it.”

He licked his lips and cursed under his breath. “Prove it to me by coming back to my place. Come into my world. No fancy ubers, no five star restaurants, no shopping, no elaborate gifts. Just you and me with my terrible friends and roommates.’

You shook your head, but you didn’t look mad at him or like you were going to cry.

At least he knows he didn’t completely fuck this up. 

This was good. He told himself. It was good because he was communicating. He was being honest and somewhat talking about his feelings. A complaint he’s gotten so many times in the past. This was different. 

This was progress.  

-

Nick had you on his lap. Nowhere you hadn’t been before. Except you were out of your dress. 

The only thing covering you was a thin champagne colored lingerie set, and a thin sheen of sweat. Nick’s right hand lay on your side as his left held another cold beer. 

You slowly ground on his lap. A small whine slipped out of your mouth at the feeling. He was still in his suit. Jacket gone, shirt unbuttoned, shoes thrown somewhere. His tie was loose on his neck. 

“Shh, none of that now,” he muttered sweetly in your ear. “You're doing such a good job.”

You shifted your weight once more, pushing yourself closer to him so that your legs dangled on the other side of the chair and your faces rested flat against him. Perched perfectly between the meat of his chest. Normally it was a place you revealed to be. You loved burning your face against his chest during sex, sometimes chancing a bite on one of his pecs, or toying with his nipples, but tonight all you could spare was desperate pants as he edged and toyed with you as the night went on and on. Never ending his little game of payback. 

 The room was hot and stuffy. All you could do was hope he would do something to relieve any of the frustration you felt. Nick brushed his hand past your core once more, making sure each bump of his knuckles brushed against your clit. 

“Your making a such a mess,” he mumbled against your ear. The warmth of his breath wasn’t helping how hot you felt. “Schmidt’s gonna be so mad once he sees how bad you've ruined his suit. You're dripping everywhere.” 

It shouldn’t be so hot to hear him say that. It made you whine as you grind your hips once more across his lap. You were aching. This slow game of arousal was driving you mad. 

“Nick,” you panted, “please. . .I need more.

Nick hummed in response, but otherwise did nothing.

After another torturous moment. Where time was fast, slow, and non existent, he finally did something.

“Get on the bed.”

This was it! Finally!  Something was going to happen!

You moved to get in the bed normally, but he stopped you.

“Nuh-uh,” he shook his head before yanking the tie off his shoulders and throwing it, “lay facing the foot of the bed.”

You slowly did as you were told, not sure how to feel about it. 

This was. . .new.

Nick got into the bed and  shifted under you.

He let his hands roam on your legs, taking his time. He smoothed them gently across your calves, slowly feathering his fingers along your thighs, just barely touching you.

You yelped. In a quick motion before you could even blink, he was yanking you closer to his face, spreading your legs wide.

Your pussy was already hot and weeping from the way he had you earlier. The sudden warmth of his breath against you only made you wetter. It made the inside of you ache and a fire within your coil and furl hotter than before.

You shuddered, and he kissed the inside of your thigh in response. 

“Don’t worry. I'm gonna be taking care of you real soon.” He talked into you, every breath of his word fluttered straight onto your clit.”

You clutched the sheets on each side of his legs. 

“Nick, I'm sorry,” you moaned, “please, please. . .I can’t take it anymore.”

“I know, I know” he chided sweetly before mouthing at your thigh, biting and sucking on it until his teeth left an indention in your skin, making you howl. He kissed the marks before circling them with his tongue, making a wet popping noise, “I know how sorry you are, and I know just how good your going to be making it up to me.”

Done with his teasing, he placed his mouth on all of you, kissing you, undoing you. He was breaking you. He lathed at you relentlessly, licking against your walls, swirling his tongue against your clit in a never ending pattern. 

His large expansive hands grab each side of your ass, rubbing your skin softly and grabbing you firmly, his fingers leaving more marks into your skin. You were finding that his frustration of not leaving noticeable bruises or hickeys on your skin was frustrating for him which he soon started becoming more and more creative. He started biting into you harder than he normally would, letting his nails stay slightly longer than normal just so he’d have a chance to scratch you with them. Squeezing you tightly just as he was doing now, so he could later watch the little moons stretch taught on your skin until they slowly faded away for him to replace them with more. 

The thought of marking you was turning him on more and more, the taste of you dripping around his face overwhelming, he had to do something. He had to let you know how he felt. He sucked your clit, hard.

You felt your moan but you couldn’t hear it. You couldn’t focus. 

You could only hear the sloppy wet sounds of Nick eating you out. You could only smell and feel the evidence of your arousal all over his borrowed slacks, and the budding pre cum spreading inside of them. You could only feel the bulge of his cock grind against your face as you held onto his thighs for balance, squeezing his legs as tight as he was squeezing yours. 

It was too much. 

You couldn’t move. You couldn’t think.

But you could open your mouth, so you did. 

You mouthed at his clothed erection, making his thrusts harder and harder onto your face. 

The feeling of your hot mouth through his pants made him growl into you which made you respond with a moan, frustrating him further.

Taking two thick fingers, he took a break from using his tongue and thrust them inside of you, curling them until he found just the right spot. After doing so, he took one more suck on your clit, moaning at how wetter you were.

Your mouth made a sound but you couldn’t hear it with his thighs clapping over his ears. 

You both came hard and fast.

He let your legs go, and you only laid there limply, not able to move a finger. You could only lay there,making small weak gasps for breath as you came down.

Nick moved from under you with a groan. 

You silently watch him strip out the rest of his clothes. 

You wanted to hate the little smug smile that graced his face as he kept looking back at you on the bed, but you couldn;t help but to  somehow find it endearing. He didn’t look so confident and accomplished when it came to other things.

You watched him sigh in relief as he undid the belt buckle and kick off his pants, leaving him only in his boxers. He rubbed his hand over his chest in large mesmerizing circles. Up, down, side to side. His chest was hairy, wel. . . a lot of him was hairy, and you loved it perhaps more than you should.

You hummed in appreciation and he threw a pillow at you with an amused huff. 

“Your such a pervert.”

He bent down and slid his hand to the nape of your neck, entrapping you in a long hard kiss. His tongue chasing and licking into you at a pce you could hardly keep up with. The firmness of his jaw as he kissed into you over and over made your head spin. The tickle of his stubble, making your legs weaker than they already were. 

He pulled away with a dark look in his eyes. His pupils drowning out the dark brown pools of his irises. 

“Im not done with you.” he whispered lowly. 

He kissed you once more, much rougher than before. His jaw squeezing your chin a tad too tight before he climbed on top of you.

It was a long night. 

The evidence of it was sticky between your thighs. 

Bright light was seeping into your eyes. 

You tried to close them tighter and shifted closer into the bed. Nick was on top of you. His firm weight was better than any blanket. When you moved your head to bury in further into the sheets, his head followed yours, burying itself closer into the crook of your neck. 

“Hungry.” he mumbled into your shoulder.

You bit his arm, and he bit your ear in response. 

‘You should be, dufus.” you halfheartedly insulted. 

“Is that anyway to treat your old man after satisfying you all night?”

“I think you mean after indulging in your boyfriend's secret sex fantasy.”

“Ok, there was nothing wild or secret sex fantasy worthy about last night.” he scoffed. ‘I just wanted to know how you really felt about me.” he mumbled out.

“I'm not gonna lie.” you started, “I think you're making up problems that don't exist.” How does having sex in your apartment make our relationship feel more real or let you know that i love you ina deeper way?” you shook your head. “It just feels fake to me. I think you just wanted to play a powertrip fantasy of telling me what to do and make me feel bad.”

“So making you come to my shitty apartment fro sex when my annoying roommates are home so you can scream my name and moan all night is just a regular sex experience for you? You like being humiliated?” 

You bit his arm again, and he laughed.

“Yeah, okay. I can admit humiliate is too extreme of a word.” he turned on his side and pulled you against his chest. 

“I just. . . i just wanted you in my world for once. On my terms.’ he paused and licked his lips, searching for the right words, “Not in a power trip sex fantasy way, but in a serious relationship way.”

You tried to turn and face him, but he firmly held you against his chest so you couldn’t.

For someone who pretended to be emotionally constipated, he sure was good at explaining and talking about his emotions, but you relented. Clearly, you looking at him while he said this was somehow not possible. Hopefully, you will understand why someday. 

“I wanted to know you weren;t embarrassed of how I live  and who I am. I needed it to be this way.”

“Well I hope one day you could simply ask me and we can talk about it, instead of letting all your fucking roomates know what i soundlike when i cum.”

“You’ll get over it. We’ve all heard what each other sound like, and it's best we keep the peace by pretending nothing happened.”

You rolled your eyes. 

“I'm not asking.”

“Thank you for that,” he laughed, “it means the world to me.”

The process of sneaking out of Nick’s room to get the shower without anyone seeing was an ordeal to say the least. But you both made it through. 

You ran into Winston on the way out, but it was not as horrible as you were imagining. 

You had on one of Nick’s very worn out and stretched Henlys and a pair of socks, and him a fresh pear of plaid cotton pants and the cleanest t-shirt he could find. Which disturbed you how hard it was for him to finally find one. 

He avoided eye contact with both of you and quickly bolted to the kitchen.

Nick gave you a weak smile, and you inwardly screamed. 

“Can we just eat in your room?”

‘Is that really something you want to do? You were just in there!” he whisper-screamed at you. “You saw what a disaster it is! Its not safe in there!”

You nodded. Too nervous to actually say anything. 

Nick’s roommates were a particular bunch you heard so much about but never spent a whole lot of time with them. It was clear he considered them his best friends. He was definitely a bit embarrassed by  them, so you never pushed for more time around them. In fact, you don;t make it a big deal because he never made it a big deal. You always chalked it up to, that's just how guys are, and left it at that. 

However, at some point, which was starting to become clearer and clearer the more time you spend with Nick, he would need to know. He wanted to know if what he thinks of as his world could ever be compatible with you and your world. 

This was the moment of truth, and honestly, you were a little scared too. 

You are from a different world, and you don't know if you're compatible with his. 

He sighed, and you gave him a nod. 

You both walked into the kitchen to face what would come, and it was terrible. 

Breakfast was so awful. It was perhaps one of your most embarrassing experiences. 

No one would look you or Nick in the eye or say anything, so you all ate in silence.

The only person undisturbed with a smile, being Nick.

You were definitely planning to wipe that fucking look off his face.

[inbarfink]

Okay, so I just found out that I can watch the whole 2015 stage production of ‘Shock Treatment’ on YouTube and, like, I have… so many thoughts and feelings. It really does demonstrate how Shock Treatment’s biggest flaws is just how unfocused and messy and… just needing one or two more rewrites to reach it's full potential. 

Like there are a few tweaks to the dialogue that makes the whole narrative a bit simpler and easier to comprehend, the satire is a bit more focused on the core themes, I thought most of the jokes were pretty solid (and the more sexual ones offer somewhat of a stronger thematic link to ‘Rocky Horror’) and now there’s actually Shock Treatment in the plot of Shock Treatment!

I do really like how they tweaked the lyrics of some of the song to smooth over some of the remnant ‘these were written for a very different RHPS sequel and re-fitted into this plot’ weirdness. I especially like ‘I they need some young blood’ and the change to the title line in ‘Looking for Trade Fame’ and ‘Look what I you/he did to my Id” (meaning Farley). Sometimes ya just need to change just one lil' pronoun and the whole-ass song makes a lot more sense. 

But the biggest positive change this Stage Version brought is the cast. Because ‘Shock Treatment’ the movie just has way too many characters. Like, look at this compared to RHPS’ cast list.

While this is maybe a natural result of the setting shift from an isolated castle to a whole town, it also leaves a lot of the secondary cast feeling flat and with no real space to develop. Comparing both of Little Nell’s roles is probably the best example. Nurse Ansalong is fun and Nell's performance is great as usual, but she’s just kinda around to be a RHPS nod and so Little Nell has Something to Do in this movie and an excuse to run around in a sexy nurse’s outfit. And these are all noble goals but… well, Columbia was an actual character, as campy as RHPS is, she was a character with emotions and pathos and tragedy and an important narrative and thematic role. Ansalong just never had the time to develop into someone with even a tenth of that depth.

(It also makes ‘Shock Treatment’ waaaay harder to Shadow Cast.)

So the stage version just cutting her out and… basically cutting everyone out except for Brad, Janet, Farley, the two Dr. McKinleys, Betty and Ralph just gives a much better chance for all of these characters to feel like actual people. Campy, exaggerated cartoony people - but definitely people. 

Like, we get to spend a little more time on making the manipulation of Janet into a superstar feel more gradual and convincing. Which both help her work better as… basically the Emotional cornerstone of the whole story and make the villains feel more despicable and more competent. Which of course really helps the two Dr. McKinleys since all of Farley’s other minions have been cut. In general they get more opportunity to say funny stuff and can really see how they use their faux psychology and therapyspeak to control people. 

....There's some level where I maybe think this script went a little too far in the other direction. That it's kinda disappointing that this Janet didn't never quite go off the deep end like her movie counterpart did. In general this version's slightly more.... grounded vibe - compared to the Movie's kinda Surrealist Nightmare Vibe - is one of the things I feel most conflicted about.

Like on one hand, this kinda campy nonsense world where gameshow hosts committing husbands to mental asylums and living your whole life on a sound-stage are normal is one of the most compelling parts of 'Shock Treatments' satire and it's kind of a shame to lose it... but also this more grounded tone creates a story that it's easier to follow an, more importantly, emotional stakes it's easier to get invested in. I think the Ideal Perfect Version of Shock Treatment’ that Exists Only in My Brain would be, tone-wise, in the middle between the movie and the stage show, but also maybe lean more towards the stage version?

The added details that Brad and Janet’s marriage has been hitting a rough patch because Brad has been fired from his job just as Janet has gotten a promotion (which I think is a detail from "The Brad and Janet Show" draft that was dropped from the 'Shock Treatment' movie?) adds some thematic resonance about the characters dealing with the Changing Times, the idea that Brad might feel emasculated with Janet’s success while has been (temporarily) regulated to the role of a househusband is maybe understandable but it is also understandable why it would frustrate Janet and thus lives her open to the McKinley's manipulations. Again, the characters are still kinda campy, still kinda silly - but having a bit of grounding for Brad and Janet’s relationship does help when this is basically… all the emotional stakes in the story.

Now, in the Ideal Perfect Version of Shock Treatment’ that Exists Only in My Brain, the rift in Brad and Janet relationship would’ve been created by the lingering effects of the events in the Frankenstein's Place. Janet would rather pretend they never happened but Brad is still visibly reeling from that time he got forced-femmed by aliens. And although the events of ‘Rocky Horror' did definitely happen in this version, it’s mentioned as just a throwaway joke (“We’ve been through so much together! Infidelity, homicide, aliens, fishnet stockings… and that’s just the engagement party”). Still, it was a funny throwaway joke - and the promotion-and-firing idea they went with makes thematic sense in this version of ‘Shock Treatment’. 

Farley Flavors also get a bit of a ‘boost’ from the trimmed cast but… honestly the changes to his character are the ones I am most split about. Because this version of Farley Flavors is generally better because there’s a bit more… flavor to him. A more visibly wacky personality, a few more gimmicks to him. And when I first saw him I was actually… pretty hyped about him as the main villain.

Because, okay, the main problem with Farley as a villain is that, despite Cliff De Young’s excellent performance, he really is just another Evil 80’s Businessman and that feels a bit bland in the wacky world of Rocky Horror. Like, the whole ‘long-lost twin brother’ twist is supposed to feel like the counterpart to the Alien Twist in RHPS and a parody of stupid soap opera twists in general. But… the thing is that even before we found out he was an alien, Frank was already an incredibly distinctive and unique character. Being revealed as an alien in the last act of the story doesn’t define him.

But since Farley doesn’t have as much going for his character, the stupid parody long-lost brother twist does end up being his defining trait and it makes his whole character feel lackluster because… it’s a stupid parody twist! 

But since Twenty-Fifteen Farley is Fairly Far-Fetched right from the get-go this means the twist has more of a chance to feel more like the original Aliens Twist. Plus, there’s bits of dialogue here and there that feel like Foreshadowing. Farley constantly reiterates that Denton is his hometown, and that he’s a self-made man (which connects to the briefly-alluded-to implication that he was adopted into a poorer family than Brad’s and that's the source of his resentment), him saying some very Ominous Things to Bard at the end of ‘Lullaby’

And then…. It turns out this version decided to cut the long-lost twin thing!

Which… honestly I probably should’ve seen coming from the casting choices. 

And like, I see the logic here. Obviously the double-casting gimmick does not work on stage, that was supposed to be a parody of soap-opera twists and that element is a lot more downplayed in this version of ‘Shock Treatment’ and like… since this plot point has been already been heavily criticized in the film version I can see why they would want to cut it. 

But… it’s not just that I feel like this twist would’ve worked better in this version it’s also that… cutting this plot point and replacing it with nothing just makes Brad - who is already kinda relegated into glorified McGuffin for most of this story - feel like he had even less to do with the plot and makes Farley’s apparent animosity for Brad even more inexplicable and shoddy.

Like, Farley still says he chose Janet ‘because of [Brad]’ so I guess we’re supposed to believe that he just finds Brad to be such a massive lameo that it makes him seethe with a burning hatred of a thousand suns. Which is an even flimsier motivation than that Twin Stuff in the movie. 

‘Duel Duet’ always has that problem that it was originally written for two characters with a very powerful well-established rivalry and emotional stakes (Dr. Frank N’ Furter and Riff-Raff) and then had to be transplanted into being about these two schmucks who barely even know each other. And removing the Twin Twist just kinda removes whatever emotional stakes they did have and exacerbates the problem. 

.....Honestly, I think the main way to really ‘fix’ Duel Duet is… instead of that one kinda ‘Girl Power’ moment they tried to give Janet that I feel is a bit too heavy-handed and obvious…

Just make ‘Duel Duet’ a Farley versus Janet song!

Like, Janet is unquestionably THE Main Character of the story with the most important emotional journey of all of the characters, she was the core target of Farley’s manipulation and the focus of his schemes, she’s the one who actually got to interact with him and developed any sort of relationship with him, the focus of this scene is on how Janet realizing she has been used by him, she already spends all of Duel Duet physically kicking his ass…

Janet should also be the one to musically face-off against Farley, especially if you remove the only reason why Farley has to hate Brad so much. Like, yeah, she does get to beat him physically... but because this is a musical - the Songs are the thing that gets the biggest emotional and narrative priority. The person who gets to Duel Duet with the Farley is the person who really beats him. And this is really moment that should belong to Janet in this version of the story.

And maybe removing one of the few Things Brad actually gets to do in this plot which is also his Big Musical Number would kinda suck for him, but… well, this version also gives Brad a nice lil’ Triumphant Reprise of ‘In My Own Way’ where he reaffirms his love for Janet and maybe you can expand that into his Big Musical Number and… y’know, if the rift in their marriage was at least kinda about Brad’s insecurities about Janet becoming the Main Breadwinner of the household… Maybe it’ll be a good resolution to his story to embrace being Janet’s little Damsel in Distress?

(I mean, I think this is an element in this musical as it is but.... but you could've leaned into it more!)

And with both Oliver Wright and Macy Struthers cut, that gives more material to make Betty’s character more interesting. Without Oliver, Betty generally gets to talk about her ongoing investigation with Janet - and that means the two of them get to have more interactions and a more visible friendship. And on the other hand, She starts out as Ralph Hapshatt’s cohost, putting on a very Macy-esque false smile and pretending they’re still happily married. It’s a fun, character-specific spin on the whole ‘falsehood of television’ motif of ‘Shock Treatment’. 

(Also since Oliver is cut, it means Betty, Janet and Brad sing “Anyhow, Anyhow” as a trio. Which… I think that means they’re gonna have a threesome. And you know what? I support Janet Majors and her two girlfriends!)

And Ralph… really got the biggest boost in personality from the trimming of the cast - especially as most of the singing roles of these cut characters for assigned to him. Like, okay, I think something that’s kind of a problem with the ending of the original ‘Shock Treatment’ is how… unambiguous it is when compared to ‘Rocky Horror’. 

Because ‘Rocky Horror’ has a very morally ambiguous cast - pretty much every character has some element that makes them at least a little bit sympathetic and also… well, if not morally wrong than at least an (Audience Participation Voice) ASSHOLE (but also yeah, a lot of them are morally reprehensible even when working against other morally reprehensible characters). And the ending leaves it ambiguous whatever Frank got what he deserves or whatever his death is a tragedy, or some combinations of the two. Not to mention the ambiguity of what happened to Brad and Janet; whatever they’ve been liberated or exploited or corrupted and whatever or not they’re better off being left behind on earth or remaining in Frank’s clutches.

And meanwhile ‘Shock Treatment’  has a VERY clear-cut ending. There is a unambiguous differentiation between the characters who are the Good Guys, and those who are Bad Guys and those who are the Bad Guys’ Gullible Victims. And, like, yeah, all the Bad Guys succeeded in their evil scheme and and are now basically literally rolling in cash

…but literally any character who has any redeeming qualities gets to happily escape this Nightmare Studio while singing a cheery song about sex. 

Even Oscar Drill and the Bits, who are quite literally Bit Characters and have very little characterization or connection to our Main Foursome, get to escape. Basically just because what little we got from them made them seem like a nice group of young gays and they never did anything bad. 

And all of the people who stayed behind were portrayed as such exaggerated cartoonish bigoted caricatures literally rushing in excitement to get themselves exploited. Nor do we get any moment for our protagonists to show any sort of concern or regret or sadness about these people who they've known all of their lives. So it’s really hard to care about them as, like, Real People who've been duped into being ground down by this awful machine of capitalism and conformism. 

I understand the idea that having a wider cast makes Denton feel more like a Town compared to the isolated feeling of the Frankenstein’s Place, and that seeing all of these people fall for Farley’s bullshit in their own slightly-different ways help drives home how prevalent and influential and powerful this capitalist proudly-selfish image-obsessed philosophy really is. But… none of these characters get enough time to develop into anything but shallow parodies of Society. There’s just not enough humanity in them to sell even an ounce of the tragedy of Columbia and Rocky's deaths. 

So condensing all of these slightly-different characters into Ralph Hapshatt… that really made him the most complicated and morally-ambiguous character in this whole musical. Because, yeah, he is a self-obsessed sexist asshole driven primarily by a desire for fame and fortune but…

We spend enough time with him to humanize him. To see how he’s struggling with internalized homophobia and how he does have his doubts about what Farley and Co. are doing to his best friends even if his thirst for fame keep winning the moral battle and that said thirst for fame is pretty obviously born from a desperate need for love and validation that this homophobic corporate world just can’t give him.

So when the show ends with him being happily strapped unto to the Shock Treatment device he illegally modified with his own two hands because he just can’t allow himself to refuse a chance to star on TV - on some level this is karma, but it’s also a grim reminder that even if our threesome of heroes are happy and free, this exploitative entertainment machine also 'just got to keep going', just got to keep grinding down other people in the name of mental health, the American family and quality entertainment. 

And although we’ve technically scaled down from a whole town to just one guy, this feels so much more tragic because as selfish as Ralph is, and as silly and intentionally-ridiculous as the writing is sometimes, he still feels so much like a person. 

[ynmnrmt]

You & Me & Rhea Makes Three: Chapter 6

rhea ripley x m!reader x m!reader's girlfriend

word count: 3,831

warnings: explicit sexual content, themes of domination/submission, dubiously consensual nonmonogamy, nonconsensual sex

a/n: So, I could flannel and wring my hands here and claim there's a grey area, but I'm not going to - this chapter contains an explicit rape scene which I am presenting as erotic material. I'm not fucking around here, I'm stating this clearly for the benefit of you the reader, if you don't like the sound of that do not read on. If, on the other hand, you do like the sound of that, then SMASH THAT KEEP READING

(The story so far: chapter one, chapter two, chapter three, chapter four, chapter five)

Jennifer is away for work. Another dreary training seminar in the middle of nowhere. She always apologises as she recounts it all for how boring it all is, be it a word association game about customer retention, or sitting in a circle to pass a ball back and forth which somehow represents customer satisfaction, or even attempting to collectively manifest customer relations.

“It’s the ball one again,” she confesses, framed awkwardly in your phone, so that it looks like she is looking up at you from the upside-down world. “I don’t know how much more of this I can take, I need to find something better than this.”

“You’ll be back by the end of the week,” you say, in a cheery hand-on-the-shoulder way.

“And I know we said we were going to have phone sex,” even having negotiated it at length you do have a little tingle of surprise to hear her say it, “but they booked us all double rooms. We’re all fucking paired up, I don’t have a minute to myself.”

“I wish,” you say, and mean it, “I could reach through the screen and hold you in my arms and make everything better.”

In the background as you say this, the door rattles and Rhea walks in, glowing from her run. “Is that Jen?” she mouths – then, without waiting for a reply jumps into view next to you. “Hey, sexy,” she waves hello, then sing-songs “missing you” and pulls your phone up to her face to give the screen a sloppy wet kiss.

“Hey, Rhea,” says Jennifer, still downcast and tired. “God, I wish you guys were here. We’d find a way to fit in a double room, obviously.” You and Rhea both chuckle at that. Her arm is pressed against yours, damp with sweat, it is all too apparent she has been for a run – and it makes your heart beat faster, remembering the long hot summer when the water and electricity were off. Then Jennifer is distracted. “Oh hell, I’m sorry, I have to go. The counting mung beans workshop just started. I’ll speak to you soon. Try not to have too much fun without me.”

“Love you,” you say.

“Love y-” adds Rhea, but then the call cuts off. “Oh, poor thing.” She plucks at her neckline, takes a whiff of herself, and jerks her head back. “God – excuse me!” And she repairs off to the shower, even though you don’t mind at all and tell her so, the dark stains on the back of her shirt define the muscles underneath so beautifully it doesn’t even occur to your lizard brain to look at her ass until she’s already out of the room.

Try not to have too much fun, the words rattle in your mind. Jennifer has gone off to this tedious seminar, leaving you alone with your other girlfriend, and worse still is being so impossibly nice about it all. You clench a fist and pound the couch – you don’t wish you were there with her, you wish she was back here, happy and safe. Yes, and you also wish you earned enough that constant horrible work outings didn’t have to be part of her life.

You resolve to have all the things she likes waiting for her on her return, a great elaborate gesture, anything to try and show the depths of your feelings. All the pillars and domed roofs of your grand design turn into fog when Rhea emerges from the shower, fresh and pink in just a towel, to skip through to her room. That image, her shy little smile as she clutches the towel to herself, remains burned into your consciousness long after she comes back through, dressed now, and flops on the couch next to you to cool off.

“I wish we were there with her too,” she muses, head back on the cushions. “We could cheer her up. Not like that,” she adds, and gives you a playful shove, even though you neither said anything nor changed your demeanour in any way.

“They don’t make you go on any awful training days, do they?” you ask.

“There’s enough health and safety shit. It’s not like it was.” Yes, there’s one you can nod sagely at, because nothing’s like it was. She’s spread out next to you, still warm from the shower, and you try not to let it distract you, but through the material of her quite conservative shorts, you can make out the shape of her vulva. “Ah, I can’t wait till Jen’s back – although I do like it when it’s just us. Sometimes, it’s sort of like we’re cheating on her.”

“Yeah,” you reflect.

“But we’re not, obviously.”

“See, sometimes I worry about where exactly the lines can be drawn, and-”

“Oh, I think I pulled something,” groans Rhea, and plops her leg in your lap. “Would you rub my calves?” It would be rude to say no, that’s what you tell yourself, but you barely need the prompt to put your hands on her. And when you do it’s not even a rub but more of a squeeze, a grope, hungry grabs at her body and her tattooed flesh – but this seems to do the job, because she swivels around in her seat to throw her other leg over you too.

“Look, Rhea,” you say, now doing something to the muscles of her calf that’s between a massage and a gentle pull, trying to get back to the point, “Jen’s really special to me, and-”

“And to me!” Rhea sits forward, in wholehearted agreement. “If she was here, you could take a leg each, instead of you having to do them both yourself.” You can’t even object to the simple purity of the idea. “You know I would never do anything to hurt her, right?” And you nod, there’s no polite way to question that. “So obviously I’d never cheat on her, just like you wouldn’t, but, um, sometimes it’s fun to pretend, you know? I hope she’s thinking about us right now, I hope we can at least cheer her up that way.” Her legs are like an unimaginably comforting blanket, right over your lap.

“I hope so too,” you say vaguely, as you try to shift so she doesn’t notice your hard-on, then you make the complete wrong move and bump it into her.

“See,” she says, as if she’s about to share a secret, “I know how much you love her, you’ve got a boner just talking about her.”

“She’s very special,” you reply, wanting to hang your head in shame.

“She’s perfect,” says Rhea, now she’s got her arms around you, she’s crept closer so it’s her thighs across you, but she’s not actually sitting in your lap and you really have your doubts that would work. As your erection tries to winkle its way between her legs, she muses on “I’ve honestly never been happier, than I have with you guys...and I was proud to wreck that guy who tried messing with you.”

Immediately you feel awkward, far more awkward than you did simply poking at her. Three of them, there had been, and Rhea went for them without a second’s hesitation. “I’m sorry I didn’t do anything there,” you say, and squeeze her thigh like a child, hoping for forgiveness.

“Oh, sweetie, no, you don’t need to be – look,” she says, she sweeps her legs down and comes forward to look you in the eye, “I know when most people say this stuff, they’re just saying it, but I genuinely don’t believe you’re obliged to act in a certain way because of your gender. I really don’t.” And she gives you the sweetest smile, for a moment you cannot bear to meet her gaze. “Besides,” she adds, “I get a bit of a thrill showing I’m stronger than men.”

“Oh,” you react, unable to even try and conceal your own excitement.

“And the thing is,” she says, gently taking your hands in hers, “it’s for exactly all those reasons that I say I reject, all those gender conventions – which I guess makes me the biggest hypocrite in the world.”

“No, you’re not,” you insist, for reasons that have nothing to do with the actual question. “And – and I hope you never feel anything less than perfectly feminine.” Which is probably the wrong thing to say, but you squeeze her hands, and she squeezes yours back and beams – and then she grips them hand and brings them up over your head. You fall back and now she’s on top of you.

“One of the things I always felt was really unfair,” she husks, the cloud of her hot breath making your head spin, as she gets both your hands gripped firmly in one of hers, “is how, in a lot of places, legally speaking women can’t rape men – which is just nonsense.”

“Yeah, i-it’s just stupid,” you agree too quickly, and it’s true, you always thought that was profoundly unjust on the face of it, though any outrage you felt was eclipsed by the little twinge it gave you imagining yourself in that scenario. Your cock is still pressed excruciatingly against her legs, but now it’s from the front, and again you squirm to try and make it better and make it a hundred times worse. It was a crazy thought anyway, it was hardly even a thought, obviously there’s no escape from her goddess-thighs – and if there was, could you bring yourself to take it?

“And I imagine the worst part is when they do get an erection,” she says in an irresistible, candlelit voice, “and they worry that on some level they did want it – which is bound to get really confusing if, like a lot of people, they have secret fantasies about someone they like doing that to them. I know I do.”

“I would be happy to help you with that,” you say immediately, any filter between mind and tongue long gone. She giggles affectionately.

“How about you?” she asks, as she dances from side to side on her hands and knees over you, swaying gently from left to right and back again. “What if Jen just grabbed you and held you down sometime?” You daren’t answer, but then you don’t need to, not when you dig further into her thigh. “And obviously, she,” Rhea’s lips brush along the length of your face, it seems like it’s random, yes, and your erection is probably completely random too, “if you really wanted her to stop, she would, because she loves you.”

“But I couldn’t bear to ask her,” you casually confess, “not by that point,” and Rhea laughs in understanding fashion in a way that makes you laugh along with her, yes, neither of you could stand to deny her, not in that situation. Then, showing amazing skill with her one free hand, she’s unzipped your trousers and takes hold of your cock. “Wait,” you say, not saying no, just asking her to wait, “wait, Rhea, Jen’s not here-”

“Oh, I know,” she sympathises, as she eases down her shorts that barely concealed anything anyway, “but let’s pretend she is.”

“Rhea, seriously, wait-” and now she kisses you, properly, not an ounce of force behind it, just her mouth against yours. You squirm, you burn internally, in this moment you don’t love anyone quite as much as you love her. You even try to break out of the iron grasp of her hand around your wrists, you know she’s stronger than you, and maybe you didn’t really want to anyway. Then she moves and then you are inside her.

“You make me so wet when you wriggle,” she says, and she’s telling the truth, all you can see is the devilish delight on her face and the halo of light around it. Her next forceful kiss is a lick at first, up across your cheek while she fucks you, but your lips end up locked with hers all the same.

“Please,” you say, when your mouth is free of hers, “stop – help -” and all the while her hips bang against you, as if drawing poison from a wound, you do not want to call it rape even in your own head because it feels so good. The way she presses down on you, the way she squeezes you, of course you don’t resist.

“Oh fuck – oh fuck,” Rhea wails, her lip draws against your face with the worlds, she’s hardly even holding your wrists any more. In fact, she gives up on that and just takes hold of your arms with both hands, because “I love holding you this way – doesn’t it feel so sensual?” As she keeps going you hear something break in the couch and her vulnerability makes your heart run liquid, you feel bad at having resisted at all.

“Rhea,” you try not to choke, “I don’t want this-”

“Oh sweetie, I don’t want it to end either, I’m so close already – please, hold out a little longer for me, please do that for me,” it seems like every word is punctuated with the light headbutt of her kissing you again. Because you love her you do hold on, as best you can without use of your hands, you bite your lip and project mental energy in any other direction, you feel your spine warp, and when she cries out with joy you can no longer resist and go off, torrential inside her. But her magnificent form doesn’t stop moving, the way she goes up and down your cock isn’t even slowed, perhaps it’s sheer momentum but more likely every lap she’s run and weight she’s lifted paying off. And as she keeps riding you and keeps enjoying it, the pain of her using a part of you that doesn’t want to be used, that, that is the finest feeling in the world.

*

You lie together afterwards, Rhea’s still on top, she sewing-machines the side of your neck with tiny pecks that are gentler than seems possible from her. “You’re perfect,” she confesses, in her post-sex flush that makes her seem flawless herself. “And the best part is, we know this is all okay. I know you worry about this, but Jen isn’t going to mind, not really.”

“Mm-hm,” you say, still not really convinced and muffled by Rhea’s hair anyway.

“I still feel all tingly thinking about it.” Yes, to be sure, you do too. “Obviously if we didn’t want it, that would be monstrous – but we did, so it’s just a fun, sexy thrill. I mean, if I thought I’d hurt you or something, I couldn’t forgive myself. Not for that.”

Immediately you conceive of this as the cruellest sort of manipulation. But deep down, you know it isn’t, not really, because you had wanted it, maybe not with a completely clear conscience, but you had, you’d burned for it. You squeeze her big, fabulous body, and for a moment you see her smile, as if she is blocking out the sun. Then she rests her head on you, between your chest and your shoulder, a gesture at normality that must have her long legs hanging off the end of the couch.

There’s a noise, a twinkle. It’s your phone. With Rhea on top of you, it’s some struggle to get your fingers into your pocket, but eventually you manage it. When you see Jen’s name pop up on the screen, there’s the familiar dread, the feeling that finally the other boot is about to drop. “What does our girlfriend say?” Rhea asks sweetly.

When you open the message, Jennifer hasn’t actually said anything. The message is a picture, her naked in striking moody light, the tangled bedsheet nearly covering one of her breasts. She hasn’t shown any of her face above the mouth, a sensible precaution, but at least now she looks as if she’s enjoying herself. You look at her arms, her stomach, soft and rounded where Rhea’s is hard, and not for the first time you wish she was here.

“Hello, hello,” says Rhea, you can feel the smirk twist her face. There’s another twinkle, and a text from your girlfriend pops up reading maybe you can pretend I’m there as well. God, how you’d love to. “Aww...she might just break my heart one day,” and Rhea’s lips are so close to yours that when she says it, your mouth moves too.

“She’s so pretty,” you say longingly, perhaps this moves Rhea’s mouth as well, and you want to cry but know you cannot show that weakness.

“Maybe, um, maybe we should go again? For her?” Her fingers rest lightly on your chest, but there’s no way in hell you could move them.

*

You had thought, an entirely theoretical but perfectly plausible grand plan, that you would greet Jennifer with a smorgasbord of all the things she likes. There would be the white chocolate cookies, and beer on ice – not wine, she feels faintly obliged to drink that on special occasions but you know what she’d choose given the chance. You’d have queued up one of those documentaries on Bigfoot hunters, yes, of course you and she would show up in the viewing figures the same as a genuine nut, but the craziness is still fun. And you’d have wrapped her up in a blanket and ordered in whatever takeout her little heart desired.

When Jennifer opens the door, she sees you on the couch, slimy with sweat and gasping for breath, wearing a t-shirt but no trousers or underwear, that least dignified form of nudity. She barely has time to put her suitcase down before Rhea creeps up from the side and snarls “You have no idea how much we missed you”, and grabs the front of her shirt. There is one sharp tug, the buttons spray everywhere, and for a moment she looks scared, horrified even – but that only lasts until Rhea bows her head and rubs her face in amongst Jennifer’s breasts.

“Oh!” flutters Jennifer. “Oh, Rhea…” And she shoots you the same sort of guilty glance you know you’ve given her more than once.

“And I missed these, too – come on, come sit with us,” though there’s no real request about it, Rhea scoops Jennifer up in her arms, and it seems as if they share a long slushy bonding look – but scarcely a second in Rhea throws her down on the couch, and you manage to scrabble out of the way just in time. Then you clutch her, protectively, though there’s no kind of protection you know how to offer that could stop Rhea as she flops her whole weight down on Jennifer’s other side.

“I’m glad you’re back,” you tell Jennifer, and for a while she doesn’t stop saying how much she loves you – pressing her face into your neck, as if something’s wrong. “H-” you gather yourself a little, “how was the – thing?”

“I’m fucking sick of it all,” she says, still nestled within you. “The whole time I was just thinking about being back here. With you.”

You find her hand and hold it tight. “You’re safe now,” you say gently.

“Yeah,” adds Rhea, “we’ve got you.”

“Have – have you two just been fucking, the whole time I’ve been away?” asks Jennifer. There’s no judgement in it, just curiosity, but it still goes straight to the black pit of your stomach.

“Not the whole time,” teases Rhea.

“You sent that picture,” you say, “it set us off,” and while this is true as you say it you know that it is a lie. And now you have the painful realisation that you never even sent a reply – but Jennifer giggles in response.

“There was one thing,” she adds, immediately you are in that intense, bottomless state of not knowing where this is going. “I did think – well, we’re not, Rhea, you don’t want children, right?”

Rhea runs a hand over her rock-hard stomach, as if imagining it swollen by pregnancy, and shrugs “Could be a novelty act, I don’t think it’s been done before.” Then she thinks, and says “There’s a reason for that, of course.”

“See, I just think,” Jennifer falters, she’s looking at you now, touching your chest, eyes full of hope, “I really wanted to – would you not come in her, any more?” And a nervous glance to Rhea with it.

“Yes!” you blurt out, faster than you’d meant to. “I mean, sure, if that’s what you want.”

Rhea gently takes Jennifer’s hands in hers, the muscles bulge in her arms but you can tell she’s not using any force here. “I have to ask,” she says, “is this about you wanting it all to yourself?” For a second, Jennifer is frozen. Then she nods, violently, all of her hair shaking with the motion. And Rhea’s expression softens, and she says “I’m so glad you said that. In fact, never mind that, I’m proud of you, I’m glad you’re setting a boundary. This whole time I’ve been worried that you’re just going along with all of this but really you haven’t actually liked it.”

“O-of course not!” insists Jennifer. Rhea smiles gently down at her, and kisses her gently on the cheek, another thing you really wish you’d done.

“Are you sure?” you ask her, and she gives you the same shaky, exaggerated nod she did before, but it’s the expression on her face that really gives you the answer.

“That’s good,” says Rhea, and brings her hands up to Jennifer’s shoulders, and starts to rub them gently. “Because in that case, I’ve got a surprise for you.” And she pulls Jennifer down, face-first, into her vagina, because of course she is not fully dressed either. “A nice sticky treat for you.”

Jennifer gives a little blocked “Hmph!” of surprise, but that gives way to the sloppier sounds of her tucking in to Rhea – and, yes, what Rhea took from you about half an hour ago. You goggle at them, not knowing what to think or do. Rhea looks fondly back at you, and with one hand in Jennifer’s hair reaches out to you with the other.

“I think she’d really like it-” Rhea begins – and then a little start, a flush, that shows Jennifer’s tongue has found a particularly soft area. She gathers herself and tries again, “I think you should do her from behind. Since she wants you so much.” And down between her thighs, there’s that frantic nod again.

You climb around behind Jennifer, and ease down her underwear – but before you do anything more you lean over her and whisper in her ear how much you love her, and how you want this to be good for her. Even when she says something that is of course muffled by Rhea’s vulva but sounds a lot like “fucking stick it in before I burst” it feels as if you are taking advantage.

[lustfangs]

Hello, Anon here. Heard you wanted a whorish ask.

|| It's been over a year since we became friends, and over that time we've spent increasing amounts of time goofing off together, both in public and just on our own, watching dumb movies and throwing popcorn at eachother. Every now and then, you'll get up to 'go grab yourself a drink' and instead just come back a few moments later to jump on my lap, laughing that you'd just taken your panties off 'cause you like the feeling. Every time, you feel a bulge press up against your cunt, and every time we laugh it off before things get awkward. But every time, I watch how soaked you are whenever you get up, trying to hide it by turning your back to me or switching off the lights. Tonight seems no different, except we've had a few drinks each. Just as usual, you make some thin excuse and come back maybe half a minute later, plopping yourself down in my lap. Except this time, I grab your neck with one hand, and bite your ear. My other hand slips right under your yoga pants, and I look you right in the eyes as my fingers stretch your seeping hole for me. You still have that half-smile, thinking this is all some kind of joke. You keep thinking that even as my fingers speed up, and soon after you're panting for breath through my grip on your neck, hands trembling and pussy quivering. I pull my hand out then, and give your cunt a hard slap through those drenched yoga pants. The sound of your moan is cut short by a hard kiss, and I reposition us so you're on your back under me, laying lengthwise to the couch. The only light in the room is from the TV, showing some old black-and-white film that neither of us much care about when I start fingerfucking you again. Smiling into the kisses, which grow increasingly desperate from you, those fingers finally bring you to orgasm, your back arching and thighs clenching together. It's here that your sense starts to kick in, and you think maybe something's wrong - or at least, something's very different. It doesn't matter what you think, though, as with a sudden click, your throat is now encircled by a collar. Your pussy, glistening wet in the pale light, is open to the air; when did that happen? I cut your shirt off you as well, splitting it down the middle along with your bra, and grab one fat tit to suck on, massaging and kneading the other. Maybe, you think, this is still some kind of prank, right? It's just a very sexy, hot, uhhh... something. Another click, and your eyes wander down to my belt - your collar is now attached to my pants, pulling on you a little while your gaze is held by the head of my throbbing cock. You straighten your back, trying to get in a better position - and in the very same moment, I push my raw meat inside you. Now's the time you start asking me to stop, to wait, to just put a condom on please wait no you don't want to get pregn-- but you can't get the rest of the word out, as I shove myself deep into you, locking lips and playing with your clit while ramming your cunt so hard it hurts. Every time we break for air, your pleas to stop get quieter, less convincing. One time, you catch yourself moaning 'breed me' and almost choke up a tear for how quickly that dumb, slutty brain of yours is getting reshaped for my purposes. The next time, you shout it, and keep shouting it until I finally fuck you full of hot, thick cum. Pulling out of you leaves a thin string trailing between us, and that begging look in your eyes is just too much. The movie finishes an hour and a half later, and by then your cunt is fucked as full of cum as it can fit without spilling, while your mouth has swallowed so much that you'll only taste jizz for a week. Having such a hazy, dummy cocksleeve has really changed our relationship dynamic. We both fall asleep on the couch.

The next morning, you wake up, mortified. Panicking, stressing, you wail away at me for doing this to you, for getting you drunk, for playing such an awful joke on you. All I do is put my finger in your mouth - and you shut right up, eyes wide with surprise as your still-full cunt starts dripping again. I use you every day now, my precious little cumwhore. We still watch movies and goof off, but the moment we get the chance to be alone, your body is mine to use and abuse. Nobody's noticed, yet, but then nobody expects you to be my fucktoy, do they?

only reaction i can give to this ask truly

[siriannatan]

How to get fWhip to dress up - fWhipScott

I have no excuse. An idea along the lines of 'what if fWhip dresses up like stereotypical handsome vampire' came to my brain and this came out of it.

fWhip was fed up with everyone telling him to dress better ever since the stupid crown picked him as the new Lord Emperor. And it was only two months, meaning two dumb monthly meetings he hosted just so he doesn't look bad following Katherine in wearing the damn thing. Meaning Gem and Pearl invading his mansion and trying to force him I to the depths of his close he didn't visit since becoming the Count of Grimlands.

"If I dress up once will you two leave me alone?" He sighed the evening before the third meeting. 

"Fine, but only so you can see that it actually makes a difference with how others talk to you," Gem sighed as Peal almost dragged her out. fWhip just sighed. He loved his dear twin a lot but she could be a bit much. Especially when it came to how rulers from outside WRA saw fWhip.

With another sigh and almost full glass of wine he went deeper into his walk in closet than he did in years. Luckily his staff made sure, against his wishes, that everything in there actually fit him and wasn't from when he was twelve. Meaning he had no trouble finding a sufficiently elegant shirt, pants and fitting vest. Coat seemed like a bit too much. He also dug out shoes more elegant than his usual heavy work boots.

Sitting through having his hair styled properly was instantly worth it as he walked into the meeting room. Putting on his most annoyed expression.

All the jaws hit the floor and Gem beamed with joy at seeing her brother in something that actually fit him properly and looked nice at the same time. And his hair was properly brushed and tied together. And there was a dark purple ribbon in his hair, nicely matching his vest that together with his rather open dark gray shirt showed just enough to remain decet. And he had his nails painted and...

But Gem's unbridled glee wasn't the best reaction. 

The best was Scott freezing in panic as his face got more and more red. Quickly hiding it behind his fan and wafting himself faster as frost formed on his and Jimmy's glasses of water, and the windows behind them. Though that was barely visible wth the shutters closed tightly so fWhip doesn't burn in his own house.

"Don't get too used to this, it's damn uncomfortable," he grumbled while making his way to his seat. His shoes clicking on the floor being the only sound aside from Scott's fan.

Scott had no idea how he managed to get through the meeting. How any of them did quite honestly. Without it devolving into a discussion on where the hell was fWhip hiding this nice clothes and all this sex appeal he was radiating. He was maybe starting to understand all.the trashy vampire romance novels he read when he first realised he maybe liked fWhip a bit more than as just a strong ally.

And... Did his pants have to be so tight? Scott wondered, as Sausage' rattled on about some bandit's. The other members of WRA didn't seem as shocked by fWhip's appearance. But they knew him longer than Scott. He only jointed the alliance when Joey - and by extension Scott's traitorous older brother Xornoth - joined the Cod Alliance. Scott himself could not care less about some fish.

But he did care about the sexy vampire and his darkened, usually sky blue eyes. He had to be hungry. Likely having to sit through hi staff doing his hair and helping him get dressed properly. Fancy really looked good on him.

It looked so good on fWhip, Scott made up some stupid excuse to do with something his council was bothering him about to stay longer. It wasn't really an important or interesting to him matter but it worked. And he was now following a likely at least slightly hungry vampire to his private office where he usually dealt with matters do to with his allies.

"So, that tunnel you mentioned," fWhip started, leaning against his desk instead of sitting in his chair. It meant that there was no desk separating him from Scott.

Scott needed a second to remember what damn tunnel fWhip meant. "Ah. Yes. My council have been bothering me to ask if it'd be possible," he rambled, feeling more and more embarrassed. Avoiding looking directly at fWhip, especially since he decided to ditch his damn vest and indecent amount of his chest were on full view for Scott.

"Your council, you say. So you wanting to talk to me alone has nothing to do with how you were practically drooling over me that whole meeting?" fWhip hummed and suddenly, with far too much fluidity and grace was suddenly very much in Scott's personal space. Knee between the elf's legs. One hand gently guiding Scott to lok at him. Other helping him support himself but Scott was quite sure it was there just to cage him in. "So?" The vampire grinned, barely flashing his fangs.

"I... I tho... You look nice today..." Scott rambled, his gaze shifting to the crossbow mounted behind fWhip's desk. Anywhere that wasn't fWhip's face actually. "Not that you don't usually, you always do but especially today..." Scott mumbled and finally managed to make himself shut up.

"Nice you say?" fWhip hummed, his hand on Scott's chin gently moving to his shoulder but not for a second stopped touching him. "Push me away if it's too much," he said and started leaning in.

Scott was sure he was about to be bitten. And strangely since he's been sheltered his whole life, was excited by the thought. But that wasn't what fWhip had planned. 

He instead kissed Scott. Effectively stealing his first kiss. But the elven prince didn't mind. It felt nice even if he wasn't sure how it was supposed to feel. It certainly didn't feel like he imagined based on his books. No one in the books grabbed other by the shirt and pulled them closer as Scott did with fWhip. There was no sudden explosion of heat or feeling in his stomach. Just light tingling where fangs nicked his lips, not enough to draw blood. And the fWhip's neither cold nor warm lips, and...

And fWhip pulled back far too soon. Pushing Scott into the chair as he tried chasing his lips purely on instinct. "Careful darling, unlike me you need to breathe," fWhip chuckled as Scott realised he did indeed forget about that need of his. As the elf caught his breath he studied the vampire's face. He was as calm and collected as always, and the way he picked his lips had Scott blushing. 

"Can..." Scott started but stopped himself. How does one ask a vampire to bite them? 

"If you want more kisses we'll have to move somewhere else, somewhere where you won't be at risk of neck cramps," fWhip chuckled and to Scott's dismay left his personal space. He did not do anything to fix his shirt though.

"Oh... That was kind of my first kiss... But it's not what I meant to ask... Would you be willing to bite me?" He rambled out on almost single breath. He had no idea what had fWhip looking as shocked as he did and had no idea which would be better for him.

"I almost forgot how sheltered you were your whole life," fWhip groaned, once more leaning against his desk. "Ar you sure you want me to bite you?" Luckily he took a small mercy on Scott and did not mention the first fact...

"Yes," Scott nodded. He was quite curious how it'd feel.

fWhip nodded and led Scott to what turned out to be his bedroom. Or simply a room he rested in since vampires apparently need some rest from time to time...

Waking up in some amount of pain here and there in his body next to fWhip's almost motionless self was almost worth the talking to he got from his council. Or how Sausage and Pearl looked at him at the next WRA meeting. So what if he had to cover his neck from time to time? At least Gem was too happy with her brother dressing up nicer more often to notice...

[onlyseokmins]

Hey again! Thank you for ellaborating on my ask I loved it! But I honestly feel like Woozi would take full effort when it comes to foreplay~ 🤤

Now, here is another food for thought: Imagine desperately riding Woozi and you can feel every inch of his dick inside you and you both just let loose and nothing matters except getting your orgasms, and he fucks you so hard and good too, that you just have to grasp onto him, digging your nails into his bizeps or back-

Btw I study religion lmao.

Please ellaborate~ <3

🐋anon

Hi, again!! ❤️ Oh 👀 do you study theology then, dear whale anon? That is an interesting field of study, do you like it?

Honestly agree w/ you that Jihoon would def put full effort into foreplay, I'm just thinking that he doesn't NEED to because his kissing skills are bar none, hehe.

I'm sure he'll gladly comply if you ask him to take more care of you because he enjoys seeing you beg and will definitely tease you the entire time because you both know how well-prepped you already are. But any excuse to touch each other, right?

Ahem, back to riding him.

Oh yes. I said begging right? Jihoon adores how cock-drunk you get, he won't budge an inch because he wants to see how desperate and needy you'll wantonly beg for him to assist. It's hard for him too, though. You drive him absolutely crazy with how sweetly you bounce on top and take his cock. Even though he knows your thighs are burning, the ache to come undone is much greater.

But just when your legs are shaking from the exertion and exhaustion, he kindly takes over. Thrusting his hips upwards so his cock hits that spot inside you just right and causes shivers running up your spine. He's biting his lip HARD at how much you tighten up around him. The coil that is threatening to snap has you digging your nails into his tense biceps that flex when he holds your hips steady in the air to keep his momentum.

The sounds, oh the sounds. This dumbass really thinks in his sex and drunk-on-you addled brain that the slap of your skin against his would make a nice beat! He's definitely using that in the next album 😭 anyways, he loves the way you moan and whimper, his own groans as he nears his climax harmonizing with yours.

You're not sure who cums first, really. The erratic movements of being so close sends you both over the edge nearly at the same time. Your eyes roll back as you slump against him, taking all of him in your fluttering hole. You're both panting, hands running up and down across the light scratches on his back that you'd unintentionally left.

He kisses you softly, gently maneuvering your body to the side so he can reach behind you. You're lost in the post-orgasmic bliss, falling asleep until he's gently shaking you awake to wash up and go to bed.

It's only months later when friends, stores, companies, and shows are all playing the latest hit by the genius producer Woozi that it all comes together. It's a sexy song and everyone loves the sultry tones. You realize why it sounds so familiar - it's the same beat that's been replicated many times in his studio - with you bouncing on his lap.

Of course, he denies all claims but you can't listen to the song anymore without nearly combusting out of embarrassment, especially when he wins an award and dedicates it on international television to you with a wink.

Tagging @onlymingyus because she said it's only respectful to 🥺🤭