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#it was 2 years and a half since i read the idiot and this weird obsession is nearly the only thing that keeps me going
hapless-raining · 5 months
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The amount of Rogozhin/Myshkin content I drew and never posted anywhere expect private twitter and telegram channel will never stop being insane to me like girl pls go to therapy
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breadbrioche · 1 year
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estimated time of arrival
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so mun x reader
➳summary: mun is excited to see you after being apart for so long
➳warnings: takes place early season 2, accidental confessions
➳word count: 731
➳a/n: some fluff before whatever happens in this weekend’s episode
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“Who’s Y/N?” Jeokbong asked, standing idly in the middle of the shop floor of Unnie’s Noodles while the other counters were rushing around him, carrying various supplies and decorations.
“Another counter on our team.” Motak explains while setting out the table. “They went overseas to help out with dealing with the evil spirits.”
“And they’re finally coming back today!” Mun added happily while entering from the kitchen, bringing in a ladder to hang up banners.
“How are they like? You seem really excited, Mun.” Jeokbong asked, noticing how bright he got at your mention.
“That’s only because he’s had a crush on Y/N since-“ Hana began with a smirk before she was cut off by a stuttering, red faced Mun who urgently pressed a hand on her mouth to silence her.
In his embarrassed state, the boy must have forgotten all about Hana’s aversion to touch as he was instantly thrown to the ground with a loud thud, making him groan painfully.
“Good god Hana! Is this really the time for that?” Ms Chu exclaimed while helping Mun to his feet. Hana rolled her eyes at Ms Chu babying Mun before continuing her previous task.
“Can someone call Y/N and see where they are now? I still haven't gotten started on making the noodles!” Ms Chu fussed. Mun immediately offered himself to do it and excused himself from the room to go to the downstairs gym speedily, ignoring all the snickers and hushed gossiping from the others.
Dialing your number, he held it up to his ear and the call picked up in only a few rings.
“Hello?”
Mun instinctively smiled hearing your voice, even if it was a bit muffled from the phone.
“Hey, it’s me. We were wondering how far away you were now since we last called. Everyone’s really excited to see you again.”
“I am too! You don’t even know how much I missed you all. Anyways, I think I’m about half an hour away now? So not too long”
“Are you kidding? That’s way too long! Tell the driver to hurry up or something” Mun complained playfully. He heard you sigh on the other side of the phone.
“You’ve already waited a year! This should be nothing compared to that. Jeez, you’re so impatient sometimes.”
“Well that’s only because it’s been that long! Why should I wait longer than I have to so I can see you again?”
You laughed at his whining and Mun’s heart fluttered at the sound. He placed a hand on his chest, trying to calm himself down; it’s just you, he told himself. There was no need to get so nervous.
“I’ll be there soon.” You reassured him. “Maybe you could help out Ms Chu or something to help pass the time”
“Fine.” He finally gave in. “But don’t you dare be late!”
“I’ll see what I can do. But don’t blame me if there’s too much traffic!” You warned him jokingly, making Mun chuckle.
“See you soon, okay? I love you.”
The words came out so naturally that Mun hadn’t even registered what he said until a few moments passed and he was met with a shocking silence on your end. Mun gasped in realization and hung up immediately, not knowing what else to do.
He groaned frustratedly as he slapped his face, scolding himself. So Mun you’re an idiot!, he thought regretfully.
Mun had half a mind to call you back and try to explain himself but millions of thoughts ran through his mind in a second; what if you don’t feel the same? What if you find it weird? How was he ever gonna face you again?
Mun was knocked out of his spiralling thoughts when he felt his phone vibrate in his hand. The screen lit up, showing a text notification from you.
<Haha you didn’t even let me say anything>
The boy’s shoulders relax slightly, relieved that you aren’t totally mad at him. As Mun tried to decide how to respond, he saw you send another text. But upon reading it, Mun thought his heart almost exploded.
A stupid grin grew on his face while his already erratic heartbeat quickens even more as Mun rereads the text over and over to make sure it his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him.
<But i love you too lets talk when I get home 💕>
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garbinge · 3 months
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When One Day Comes
Chibs Telford x F!Teller!Reader Tig Trager & F!Teller!Reader 30 Day Fic Challenge (26/30)
Summary: An unexpected visitor turns into a trip back to Charming.
Word Count: 4k
Warnings: Angsty. Mentions of violence and injury.
SOA Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @kmc1989
Part 1 // Part 2
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“Some guy’s here.” Thomas walked inside the house and interrupted your paperwork. 
Quickly, you looked up from the scattered mess on the dining room table and stared at Thomas. 
“You tell him that the market is on the next path on the highway, just like the sign says.” 
It was common for people to mix up your dirt path for the one up the road where the large farmer’s market was. It had prompted you and Nero to place a sign at the top of the path to communicate that but occasionally some idiot wouldn’t read and would make their way to your home on the farm. 
“I did, but he told me he was looking for you.” Thomas didn’t seem concerned, he was currently searching through the fridge for something to spoil his dinner but that was the least of your concerns. 
As you stood up, you continued to ask your nephew more questions. “Did he say anything else? Give a name? Say why he was here?” While Thomas had his back turned to you, you were casually grabbing your gun from the lockbox that you kept hidden by the back sliding door. 
“Nah, just that he was looking for you, he looks weird, curly hair, sunglasses– looked stressed.” He had a mouthful of something in his mouth as he spoke, still staring into the fridge. 
“Alright, probably just someone trying to sell us something.” That wasn’t uncommon either, you’d get a lot of sales people to come try and sell you farming equipment, get you to join their local markets, all typical for the size of land you had. But it didn’t take away from your visceral reaction to move towards protecting yourself. That was a habit that was engraved in you from your days in Charming and you’d find that just because you got out of the toxic town, the Teller ways stayed close to you regardless. 
“Oh–he didn’t have a car, looks like he walked from up the path.” The kid still was half in the conversation as he spoke but that detail was one that alerted you that maybe this wasn’t someone trying to sell something, and maybe there was something more happening here. 
Not knowing what you were walking into, you tucked the gun in your waistband and draped your shirt over it before placing your hand on the sliding door handle. “Alright, do me a favor? If you see Nero, tell him to meet me outside.” It was your backup, you didn’t want to alert the young boy and scare him, you knew he had been coming in from his daily chores which meant there wasn’t going to be much that would pry him away from his playstation for the rest of the day. 
As you cautiously walked outside, practically scaling the side of your back porch to get a look at who was there. Your hand was behind you, ready to grab the gun as a threat and if needed force but when you saw the wrinkled button down shirt that was pacing up and down the dirt driveway, your shoulders dropped. As you exhaled out and closed your eyes to shift your mind from one issue that was now nonexistent to the current one you were facing, it was loud enough to grab your visitor’s attention. 
Now, the curly haired man was looking in your direction, taking his sunglasses off to get a better look and calling out your name in a questioning manner. 
“Yea, Thomas had me convinced you were a hitman.” You were now moving down the stairs of your porch and onto the dirt driveway to meet the man. “But I guess he wasn’t too far off.” 
“Your words, they hurt me.” He faked his heart breaking as he grabbed it and made an excruciating face. 
“Tig.” You nodded as you approached him and he immediately stood straight up from his display of acting and brought you in for a hug. 
“Hey, doll.” The squeeze was tighter than you expected but you chopped it up to being years since you last saw him. “Sorry for the surprise visit,” his voice was in your ear before he pulled back and then pointed over his shoulder, “I–uh, tried to be a little discrete, parked my bike at the beginning of the driveway, but he was driving in one one of those ATV’s when I walked up. Didn’t mean to ruffle any feathers.” He referred to Thomas. 
You laughed at that and waved your hand. “Thomas is at the age where if it doesn’t have a controller he doesn’t think twice about it.” 
Tig laughed at that but you could tell that it was a nervous laugh, that he was holding something back. It was then you realized he wasn’t wearing his kutte and figured that had something to do with his visit. 
“No kutte.” You reached out and patted his chest. 
He looked down with a frown and immediately looked up. “Oh, uh, yea, left it back on my bike,” he was pointing over his shoulder again, “he–Chibs, let me know about the rule, Hap too, just in case, you know.” 
The rule. You remembered the last thing you said to Chibs the last time he was standing in pretty much the same spot as Tig was right now. 
“Don’t come back here unless the ink is blacked out and the kutte is off.” 
It wasn’t exactly the rule you gave, you didn’t say next time you come by don’t wear your kutte and leave your bike at the driveway. You told Chibs, he needed to leave the club if he wanted to see you again. But you had to appreciate that he had told his right and left hand men that they had to be respectful of your home, in case. In case. That got you thinking, what did that mean, in case? 
“What do you mean in case?” You felt your heart starting to beat faster and faster as the thoughts danced in and out of your mind. 
Tig looked visibly upset, visibly stressed, and that made you even more on edge. 
“What happened?” You knew what happened but it didn’t stop you from asking the question.
“It’s bad, doll.” Tig inhaled. “He wiped out. He’s at St. Thomas in surgery right now, second one since he got there.” 
“How’d he wipe out?” Again, you had a ballpark idea of how it happened but you needed to hear it from him. 
“He got shot, Mayan retaliation.” 
A good five seconds passed before you responded but to both you and Tig those five seconds were likely feeling like 5 minutes. 
“I’ll get a bag, follow you there.” Your brain was starting to mush together, thoughts were melting into other ones, worry and panic were sparring back and forth in your gut. 
But before either of them could continue the conversation, someone was interrupting you by calling out your name but with Aunt before it. Turning around quickly you saw your eldest nephew on the porch, no weapon in hand but his demeanor was firm, ready to jump into action at any moment. 
“Thomas told me someone was here.” He said as he stepped quickly towards you too, Tig bringing his hand up to the bridge of his nose as he turned around. 
“You alright?” He was next to you, towering over you, similarly to how your brother– his father, did. 
“I’m fine, sweetheart.” You squeezed his shoulder. “An old friend of mine is sick at the hospital and Alexander was just coming by to let me know.” It was a calculated sentence, Abel didn’t know much about Jax, it was a constant struggle of what information you wanted to share with him and what you should. It was a lot easier when he was younger, the story of how his father passed was watered down similarly to his adoptive mother’s but as he grew older, he had more questions, more curiosity. “Why don’t you come help me pack, Abel. I’m going to go visit him for a couple days and I’ll run you through the things around the farm you can take over for me.” 
“Yea, alright.” He wouldn’t take his eyes off Tig who had only waved by lifting his hand slightly at the mention of his first name earlier. 
“C’mon.” You grabbed the young boy by the shoulders and turned him around. 
As you started to grab things and toss them into a duffel bag, you tried to mask your anxiety and spiral of thoughts. 
“So Nero can take care of the feed deliveries and stuff that happens while you’re at school, I’ll call him on my way out, but I’m gonna need you to finish the inventory on the table, I’d ask Thomas but, well, I don’t trust he’ll pull himself away from that TV before the submissions are due.” You chuckled, awkwardly. “But besides that, just feed the critters, morning and night, I’ll toss in some extra allowance for you since you’re gonna have to get up earlier to make it all happen. Also, I’ll leave money for food, don’t cook, I’ve seen what you and Thomas make and I’d rather you order from some shitty fast food restaurant than risk one of your concoctions sending your organs into a fit.” It was then you were pulling your wallet out and searching for bills. “Also ask Nero for anything, I haven’t talked to him yet, but he should be around.” 
You were rambling and Abel saw through it. 
“That guy knew Dad, didn’t he?” He was staring right at you, his eyes were searching for an answer on your face. 
You moved to close the door, you didn’t want Thomas to hear, but it was also a way to break Abel’s stare on you. 
“Yes.” You were still trying to search for what you were going to say but you knew he needed the truth, or at least a morsel of it. “My brother–Jax–your father, lived a complicated life, one that he never wanted you or Thomas to experience or honestly even know about. I’m not sure he really thought through what that looked like once you got older, but nonetheless, his life was not suited for you kids.” Abel was glued to you, taking in every word hoping the next ones would offer up more than this reiteration of what he’d sort of heard before. You plopped down on the bed in front of him and sighed. Abel wasn’t ready for Jax’s full story, his mind was young and impressionable, the chance he’d leave here and go to Charming for answers and end up back in the generation’s curse was too feasible, but he could hear yours. 
“Your dad had a group of friends, always around, honestly they became like family, my mom–your grandma, lived for it, we always had dinners, always hung out, we were all close.” You explained. “There was one friend in particular, that I got, well, close with.” 
Abel laughed at that and smirked. 
“Watch it.” You smirked back at him. 
“Was Dad mad?” He was intrigued by the story, you didn’t often talk about this stuff. 
“Annoyed at first.” You thought back and smirked before correcting yourself. “Yea, he was mad. But the guy–his friend was older and so was I, so he couldn’t really say much about it, just huff and puff.” 
“Was grandma mad?” 
You laughed at that. “The opposite, grandma loved it, the idea to make the family more of a family, she had been pushing it forever. Honestly, I tried to go against it but this really had nothing to do with her, this was…different.” It started to hurt talking about it but you continued. 
“This guy, he was super close to your dad, one of his closest friends, and he was kind, funny, caring, had this accent that just melted my heart.” The smile on your face was contagious and Abel was catching it as you spoke. “He’d take me on these trips, we’d explore all these national parks,” you thought back to every ride you’d taken on the back of Chibs’ bike where you’d have picnics, get caught in the rain, went quarry swimming, the memory of Chibs swimming still making you chuckle. That slowly turned into you remembering other memories, “we went to Ireleand together too.” As those words left your mouth, you felt your stomach drop as you looked up at Abel who was none the wiser of why you really went. 
“You loved him.” Abel was smiling. 
You wanted to agree, even tell him that you still did but that was a can of worms you didn’t need Abel to open, let alone yourself so all you did was nod. 
“What happened?” 
“Remember how I said your father had a complicated life? Well so did his friend, and his friend didn’t want to leave that complicated life and I did.” It broke your heart saying it, you had thought it all these years but never spoke it outloud let alone to your nephew.  
“You left because of us. Thomas and I.” Abel put the pieces together. 
“I left for you. I’d put you before anything, always.” You were leaning over and grabbing his hands and squeezed them. 
“It was that guy that was here last year. The one with the bike.” 
All you did was nod. “He apparently got hurt and I just–” You looked at Abel and weren’t sure if you wanted to say the words, they felt more like something you needed to say out loud for you than for him. 
“Need to know if he’s okay.” He cut you off. 
Another nod escaped you but you spoke up to say something different, something that broke you. “And say goodbye if he isn’t.” A tear fell from your face and you wiped it away immediately and smiled quickly standing up to finish packing your bag. 
Before you could stuff one more item of clothing into your bag, you felt an arm around your shoulder and bring you in for a half hug. “I’ll bribe Thomas with my new controller, we’ll both pick up the farm work while you’re gone.” 
“Thanks for understanding, kiddo.” 
______
The ride was long, longer than you remembered but it made sense that you moved this far away. As you entered the town line, everything came back to you, like a wave that washed over you. One full of memory, grief, and that one feeling that ultimately always wrecked everything. Hope. 
The sounds of more motorcycles joined the one that was already behind you, you recognized some of them but not all of them. They followed you to the hospital and as you stepped out of the car, Tig was walking back up to you, a group of more MC members standing a few feet behind. Despite this being the life you grew up in, it felt strange, it felt wrong, but you pushed that all aside, or at least tried.
“Party of 15 joining us inside?” You asked looking back at the group. 
“It’s a messy time, doll. Our president was gunned down, need all the protection we can spare.” 
“Yea, when isn’t it.” You turned and began your walk into the hospital where you eventually saw Happy. He looked visibly upset, the Sgt at Arms patch on his kutte felt heavier today than other days and you knew that. “Hap.” You whispered and slouched down to see his face before he was standing up quickly and very awkwardly. 
He didn’t move to come hug you at first, but when you dropped your shoulders and tilted your head with an accompanied “c’mere” he was moving to embrace you, an act Happy reserved for rare times in his life, but this qualified as that. 
“He’s out of surgery, they said he’s in serious but stable condition.” He was now looking back between you and Tig as he spoke. 
“Is he conscious? Can I see him?” 
“Only letting one at a time back there, Quinn’s back there now.” Rat spoke up, bringing himself into the conversation as he stood from the seat next to where Happy was. 
“We’ll tell him to jump out.” Tig’s hand was on your back and giving daggers to Rat. “Go, take all the time you need.” 
You stood at the door for a minute, staring at him, all broken and helpless. You felt your fight of flight kick in as you took a step back, followed by a step forward before inevitably the freeze tactic kicked in. Suddenly you were stepping in and at his side. 
His eyes moved to take in the figure next to him and they went wide before they closed. “Quinn, could you tell those lovely nurses to either cut this morphine or give me enough to knock me the fuck out, I’m bloody hallucinatin’.” 
“Not hallucinating.” Your hand moved to lightly push his hair out of his face. “I’m really here.” 
He stared at you for a good minute before smiling. “I must be really bad if they got you to come back here.” 
“You’re fine,” you continued to stroke his hair, “Tig has a way to make everything seem more dramatic than it really is.” It was a lie but you needed him to believe he was going to get better if there was any hope for it to be true. 
“If I knew escaping death was all I needed to do to get you back here, I’d have done this ages ago.” He laughed as he tried to sit up. 
“Hey, hey, hey, hey–relax.” You gripped his arms and assisted him as he scrunched up his face and groaned. 
“You know what happened?” He asked, moving over for you to sit but you didn’t. 
“I do. Tig told me. Retaliation.” You nodded, not letting go of his head despite not wanting to cuddle in next to him. 
“He tell you I’m done?” 
Those words came from him but felt like they were caught in your throat as you tried to answer. 
“You–You’re just saying that, scares like this, they stir up two things in you guys, either the motivation for severe retaliation–the kind that that starts a war, or it shakes up the desire to want to leave, go nomad, take the back seat.” You remembered the typical club ways. 
“I’m not just a member, love. I’m the president, going nomad, taking the backseat, ain’t really a choice for guys like me.” 
“Neither is leaving if I remember correctly.” You took a deep breath. 
Chibs closed his eyes and took a breath similar to yours. “I’m old. Too old for this. I’m not made to hand off the gavel and take the other head of the table. I’m done. After this hit, I’ll be lucky if I can ride again, they’ll offer me a spot out of courtesy but that’s not me.” 
“And what will you do with all this free time you’ll inevitably have?” 
“I have a friend, real looker this friend of mine, pretty as ever, owns a farm a few hours out from here, I’d probably see if she could use the extra farm hands, might take some convincing, but I’m hoping she’ll come ‘round.” 
There it was. That hope that Charming was always serving up. You had been here less than an hour and it was already happening, it wasted no time. 
“Focus on getting better, you can think about your next act when the bruises fade and the bullet hole is just a scar.” You plopped down next to him, your way of softening the blow of not giving him an answer of coming to the farm. You wrapped your arm around his and leaned your head on his shoulder, lightly as to not cause him more pain, but you had a funny feeling that he wouldn’t have told you if he was in pain from it, it was something both of you wanted, to absorb every second of this moment because the next ones were still so unsure. 
______
You sat on the back porch swing, coffee cup in your hand, birds chirping as the sun began to rise across the fields. You stared at the dirt path driveway, like you were waiting for someone to arrive but immediately your thoughts were interrupted by the complaints and arguments of two young boys. 
As your head twisted to look at them, you saw them bickering and slightly pushing each other before they stopped as they got in front of you. 
“See you tonight.” Thomas bent down and placed a kiss on your cheek before he got a head start down the porch. Abel was looking down at you and tilted his head. 
“You alright?” The concern was littered all over his face. 
“I’m fine. You have your keys?” You knew he did, Thomas was normally the forgetful one being the younger more daydreaming brother. 
“Yes, I’ll be home at 4 today, I’m picking up a part for my dirt bike downtown.” He dangled his keys. 
“Sounds good, drive safe.” 
He was leaning down to place a kiss on your cheek similarly to Thomas before he began walking away. But after taking one step, he paused and looked down at you before he followed his brother. “You happy?” 
Big question for two little words. 
“I am, kid.” You smiled and Abel accepted that and nodded before jogging after Thomas. 
You watched them pile into the used car that used to be yours that you gave Abel when he got his license. As the dirt kicked up on the driveway, you still stared down the lengthy path long after they left, only to be interrupted as the accented voice brought you back to the porch. 
“Lost in thought, love?” Chibs was shirtless, wiping the sweat from his forehead as he stood at the deck stairs. 
You couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face as you stared at him. He must’ve gotten up early to take care of the animals, he had dirt on him too which meant he probably did some work in the crop fields or the greenhouse. 
“Just waiting for the day someone comes down that driveway and steals you away from me.” 
“Not happening.” He was walking up to you and leaned down to press a deep kiss to your lips, one that you always melted into fear it’d be your last. “I told you 3 months ago, I tied up all the loose ends, no one knows I’m here. But if you’re not comfortable, you say the word and I’m out of here.” The words were spoken so close to your lips. 
You brought him down for another kiss. “I’m worried about losing you, not pushing you away. Just, hard to believe that dream you were sellin’ over a year ago was in stock is all.” You pecked his lips again. “Plus I like not having 5AM livestock duty anymore.” A laugh escaped you as one left his mouth as well. 
He was standing up now and shaking his head before he realized the porch light was disconnected. His hand reached up to grab the bulb and screw it in tighter. Your eyes stared at the black ink that was spread across his back. It was healing nicely. Maybe that was a sign that you could block out the past and move forward from it, or maybe it was all wishful thinking.
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brewsterispunkk · 1 year
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THE TUTOR
part 2/4
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pairing: eddie munson x afab!reader (period is mentioned), eddie munson x fem!reader
WC: 4.1k
summary: reader and eddie begin their little deal.
warnings: idiots. just idiots. also brief SA-- nothing explicit, just groping--NOT main pairing, recreational drug use
A/N: here is part 2! hope u love it! pls pls pls leave feedback ;) read it and weep.
Senior Year Bucket List
1) Get drunk
2) Skip Class
3) Do a drug
4) Sneak out
5) Skinny dip
6) Get a boyfriend, lose my virginity
You sighed and shook your head as soon as you’d written that last part, hands only half-shaking.
This was fine, you thought to yourself. 
It wasn’t weird, you kept telling yourself. It wasn’t. Eddie himself had asked you to come to school Monday with an itemized list of what exactly you’d felt like you’d missed out on. “A bucket list of sorts” he called it. 
You had to keep yourself from adding “feeling safe” to the list of things you’d felt you’d missed out on.
That was difficult for you sometimes. 
For the most part, you’d been able to compartmentalize what had happened to you last summer: the deaths, the torture, the “mall fire.” The rest of Hawkins knew that you’d survived it, along with Steve, Robin, and the kids. You’d gotten away with minor bruising to the face and neck after a Russian tried to choke you in an effort to get you to talk. It wasn’t ideal, but it could have been worse. Steve had been the one to take the brunt of the torture. You and Robin had screamed yourselves hoarse while they beat him in the other room. 
You sometimes still had nightmares about the sick sound of their fists hitting his face.
When you’d emerged as one of the survivors of what they were calling the “Starcourt Mall Fire,” your mother had been relieved. After your father had split when you were ten, you were all she had. Still, she hadn’t been prepared for the effects of what had happened to you. To be fair, neither were you. Neither were any of you. 
You’d always been shy, ever since you were a kid, but now instead of having a generally quiet disposition, you were skittish. The slightest noise made you jump, and you couldn’t stand to listen to Reagan talk about the U.S.S.R. on the news without having a panic attack. The nightmares had subsided after about two months, though they returned whenever you were stressed. 
You found you always looked over your shoulder, always looking out for some unknown thing that might be stalking you. When people talk about saving the world, they never talk about the ugly parts. About the broken fingernails and the insomnia and the muffling of sobs behind your hand as you break down in the girls’ bathroom. 
It’s a lonely thing, being a hero. An unfair thing. You felt like that night at Starcourt, when Hopper and Billy Hargrove hadn’t emerged from the fire, your adolescence had been stolen from you. That it had disappeared with the smoke and ash as it engulfed Scoops Ahoy and the rest of the shopping center. You hope that if Eddie actually does follow through with this little deal of yours, you’ll be able to experience at least a little of it. 
- - - -
“So,” Eddie drummed his hands on the top of your desk as he slid into the seat in front of you. “What do you have for me, miss tutor girl?”
He was awfully chipper for 7:00 in the morning. You blinked at him and skated your gaze across the room. 
It was close enough to first period for the room to be reasonably filled with students, most too sluggish to notice. But a few girls towards the front looked over their shoulders at him, eyes narrowed, before zooming in on you, where they widened curiously. 
“What, scared for your reputation?” Eddie was only half-joking, his eyes a little guarded. They narrowed at you. 
You shook your head almost comically. 
“No,” you burst. “No, not at all. Just had a weird night.”
“Hm,” he looked at you skeptically. You rolled your eyes.
“We’ve already talked about this, Eddie. I don’t have a reputation for you to ruin.”
He snorted at that.
“Alright then,” he leaned forward, his chin on his fists. “What’s got you so skittish, then? Another crazy party like Friday?”
“No,” you sighed, leaning down to retrieve your list from your backpack. “Just couldn’t sleep.”
 “Okay.” He looked like he didn’t believe you. You didn’t blame him; you couldn’t have been that convincing. You couldn’t bring yourself to care.  
“Did you bring it?” He asked. 
You nodded, slamming the sheet of notebook paper onto the desk and slid it over to him. 
“Here you go,” you pulled at your sleeve nervously. “Just don’t laugh, okay?”
Eddie looked at you and feigned shock. 
“Me? Laugh at you? I’m offended.”
“Eddie, I’m serious,” you felt your cheeks flush and your stomach plummet. “I’m just–It’s embarrassing. I’m being very… vulnerable and if you’re gonna laugh, we can just forget about it—”
“Hey, hey, hey,” his warm hands covered yours where they were sitting on the desk. He squeezed your palms reassuringly.  “I was kidding. I won’t laugh. Scout’s honor.”
You looked into his eyes for a moment to see if he was serious. All you saw was sincerity. You let out a deep breath. 
“You were a boy scout?” 
His lips spread in a wry smile as he turned to the paper. 
“Nope,” he unfolded the list. “It’s the thought that counts, though, right?”
You shrugged. 
“I guess?”
“Okay, what do we have here?” 
You sat in awkward silence as Eddie scanned the page, dark eyes focused. Hie brows were furrowed and his lips pouted in concentration. 
“‘Get drunk,’ we can certainly make that happen. ‘Skip a class,’ you won’t need to ask me twice.” He stopped for a moment and huffed a laugh. 
You felt your cheeks heat up. 
“What–”
“‘Do a drug.’” He said with a secret smile–like he knew something you didn’t. 
“Yeah,” you drew out. “I figured you’d know a guy.”
“Oh,” Eddie laughed. “I know a guy.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” he smiled at you, before turning his eyes back to the page. “Ohh.”
Eddie’s eyes sparkled as he turned them back to you. He looked like a sprite, you thought. With his wild hair and mischievous smile. He was gorgeous. 
“‘Get a boyfriend,’” he set the list down on the table. “Am I going to be playing match-maker, teacher’s pet?”
You rolled your eyes. He was teasing you. 
“If that’s what it takes,” you quipped, your nervousness having melted away. “And I am not a teacher’s pet.”
“Whatever you say,” he raised an eyebrow at you. 
As you opened your mouth to respond, the clearing of a throat interrupted you. 
You looked up to see Cameron Reyes leering over Eddie. 
“Hey. You’re in my seat,” he sneered. “Beat it.”
Eddie sighed, before slinking out of the seat slowly, taking his time. 
“My apologies,” he smiled at Cameron, before dropping into his own seat, next to you. 
You glared at the back of Cameron’s head. 
Why did he have to be such an asshole?
Cameron was on the swim team and you’d had classes with him since Kindergarten. He hadn’t always been a dick; In fourth grade when you’d skinned your knee, he’d helped you up and walked you to the nurse’s office. It wasn’t until high school, when he’d begun running with guys like Tommy Hagan, that he’d changed. Now, you couldn’t stand him. 
That was the way of things, though, in Hawkins. There were the bullies and the bullied—rarely anything in between.
- - - -
As you walked down the halls, you felt their eyes on your legs and you regretted letting Robin convince you to wear this skirt. 
The denim felt heavy on your hips. You wiped your clammy hands on the blue material, wishing that you didn’t have to walk practically across school to get to pre-calc. 
“Looking good,” someone whistled from behind you. You felt dread seep down your spine. 
Please no, not here. 
This wasn’t the first time you’d been catcalled. 
The first time was when you and Robin were thirteen and walking to the general store down the road from your houses. A few men in a pick-up truck had rolled their windows down and told you in great detail all they’d liked to do to you. You and Robin hid inside the general store until the clerk called your mom to pick you up. You hadn’t even gotten your first period yet. 
However, this was the first time you’d been catcalled at school. It still felt just as scary as the first time. 
“Where have you been hiding those legs, teacher’s pet?” 
You whipped around at the nickname, bristling at it. You hated when people called you that, unless that person was Eddie. 
You were faced with a basketball player; one of the guys who hung out with Jason Carver and sometimes Lucas. Thomas Reed. Your skin crawled at the way he and the two boys behind him looked at you. 
“Fuck off,” you spat at him before turning on your heel and walking faster to your destination. 
“Aw, come on, don’t be like that!” He called after you, but you could barely hear him over the blood rushing in your ears. 
It only calmed when you’d reached your classroom.
- - - -
“Are you even listening to me?” You smacked his hand where it was tapping on the wood of the library table. Outside, a heavy autumn rain pummeled the sidewalk, the trees swaying with it. 
“Yes,” Eddie rolled his eyes. 
“What did I just say?”
“That…Holden is a whiny little bitch.”
You sighed, bringing a hand to your forehead. 
“No.” You ground out. “And if you write that in your essay, Ms. Taylor is going to fail you and me, so please, can you take this seriously?”
He sighed and had the nerve to look a little guilty. It made your heart clench a bit. 
In the few sessions you’d tutoring Eddie, your crush had done anything but lessened. In fact, it had grown tenfold. It was one thing to admire him from across the room, it was another completely to spend time with him and actually be able to talk to him. 
You found that in addition to being cute and pensive, he was kind and not at all the scary loner that everyone painted him to be. If he hadn’t cemented his reputation by being an avid player of D&D, he would’ve been popular, you thought. 
And all this goes to day: you couldn’t stay mad at him, even when you wanted to.
“Okay,” he said, blowing his bangs out of his eyes. You briefly reminded yourself to offer to cut them for him later—he’d been complaining about them getting in his face all session. “I’m sorry, what were you saying?”
“What?” Your attention snapped back to him. Eddie looked at you like you’d grown another head. 
“Uhh, I asked what you were saying?”
“Oh! Oh yeah,” you shook your head. “I zoned out.”
“I gathered that.” Eddie snorted, leaning forward. “Uh, off-topic, but I was wondering, when do you wanna get started on that bucket list?”
“Oh. Whenever.”
“I was thinking we could start this week.”
“So soon?” You practically squeaked. As excited you were about these new experiences, you were nervous. Especially because the person you’d be experiencing them with was Eddie. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself. 
“No time like the present,” Eddie’s voice was chipper. “So, what did you wanna start with?”
“I thought we’d start small and work up to something bigger?” You asked.
“That sounds good,” Eddie nodded. “How does skipping class work for this week?”
“Ugh, not well actually.” You sighed, sour. “We have that exam this week in Taylor’s and then for Chem I have—”
“Relax, we don’t have to start with that one. Hmm, what else…”
“We could always—”
You cut yourself off, thinking better of it, but Eddie caught you. 
“Nevermind.”
“No, what is it?”
You looked at him skeptically. 
“If you wanna do something, you gotta tell me. It’s your bucket list, tutor-girl, not mine.”
“What if we…did a drug?”
God, you sounded like such a teacher’s pet saying it.
“Okay, teacher’s pet.” Eddie’s face was gleeful, excited. “You’re full of surprises. We can do that, definitely.”
“Okay,” you let out a breath. 
“Any reason why you jumped to that one?”
“I just– I’m so stressed.” Thomas Reed’s lustful gaze flashed in your mind and you shook it off. 
“You okay?” Eddie grabbed your hand on the table. You swallowed. 
“Yeah,” you said lamely, mouth dry. “Just–a lot going on. School.”
“School,” Eddie repeated like he didn’t believe you. His eyes held yours for a moment before he nodded. “Okay teacher’s pet. Drugs it is. Any preference?”
“Nothing too crazy. Just something to take the edge off?”
“I can do that,” he smiled. “This is gonna be fun.”
“What do you mean?”
“I just think you’ll be funny high.”
“We’ll see,” you narrowed your eyes at him. He just smiled at you for a moment. Your eyes held his and you had the sudden urge to reach over the table and kiss him. You coughed, turning back to your notes in front of you. 
“Anyway, what do you think Salinger’s trying to say?”
“Other than the fact that Holden is annoying?”
“Eddie, I’m serious—”
“I am too!” Eddie insisted. “All this shit about ‘phonies,’ when he’s just like them–”
“You know, I thought you’d relate to Holden.” You smirked at him.
“What?”
“Well, he’s an outcast—all teenage angst and—”
“I’m twenty, thank you.” He snapped at you, causing you to stutter. 
“Oh, no I didn’t mean outcast like—”
“No, it’s okay,” Eddie chuckled, waving you off. “It’s true. And I like it that way.”
You eyed him skeptically. 
“Really, I do.” He folded his arms over his chest. “There are too many assholes in this school. If I wanted to fit in, I’d have to act like them. At least a little bit. Besides, I’ve got people. Not much, but I’ve got’em.”
You hummed. 
“I’ve never thought of that.”
“What, Holden being a bitch, because—”
You smacked his arm, laughing. 
“Okay, okay, sorry,” Eddie giggled. He giggled. Your heart leapt. “What, though? What did I say that was so profound?”
He was being sarcastic, you could tell, but you didn’t care. 
“The whole—having to sacrifice part of yourself to fit in. It’s true. I’d never thought of it like that.”
He hummed, eyes holding yours a moment, before his grin broke the moment. 
“Maybe I should be the one tutoring, huh?”
You scoffed and rolled your eyes. 
“Turn to page 225.”
- - - -
Thomas found you again the next day, this time before school as you were at your locker. 
“Hey there,” he smiled, sliding up next to you, effectively boxing you in between him and the locker. You jumped, moving as close to the locker as you could. “How are you today?”
“Leave me alone,” you ground out, trying to slip past him, but his hand in a hard grip on your arm stopped you. 
“Aw, but we could have so much fun, teacher’s pet.”
“Let me go—”
“Where’s your little skirt?” he asked, grip tightening on your arm as you scrambled to get away. 
You silently cursed whoever in the administration office had placed your locker on one of the most abandoned hallways in the school. 
“Your legs looked so good—”
His palm came to squeeze the meat of your ass and your stomach churned. Without thinking, you spat in his face, palm coming to connect with his cheek. 
“You cunt—”
“The hell is going on here?” 
Eddie walked briskly up to you as you stepped back from Thomas. He moved to stand between you two, face hard. It was the mask he put on every day in front of the rest of the school, the ones who thought he was mean and scary. Only now, you weren’t sure how much of it was a mask. 
“Nothing, man.” Thomas waved him off, wiping his face. He glared at you in a way that made your feet stick to the spot. 
“It doesn’t look like nothing.”
“I said it's nothing.”
“And I said—”
“It’s fine,” you mumbled. 
“Hey wait—”
Eddie moved to grab Thomas as he walked away from the two of you. 
“I said it’s fine,” you said louder this time, and reached out to grab Eddie’s shoulder and pull him back toward you. 
“Bullshit!” He spun and turned toward you, clearly pissed off. “What the hell was that?”
“I said it was fine, Eddie!” You burst at him, voice cracking. You took a deep breath. 
“Honey, are you—” 
“I don’t want to talk about it,” you interrupted Eddie’s suddenly soft voice. You wiped a stray but of moisture from under your eyelid. “Let’s just go to class.”
“But–”
“Eddie, drop it,” you all but snapped, before adding lamely, “please.”
“Fine,” he grumbled. “Lead the way. Taylor’s gonna be pissed if I’m late again.”
You could practically hear him simmering as he walked a half-step behind you to class, but you didn’t care to acknowledge it. You’d made it abundantly clear you didn’t want to talk about it. If he pushed you, you might just snap. 
As the two of you made your way down the halls, you felt eyes following you. They were all wondering: what was the quiet nerd doing with the freak? You didn’t care to acknowledge that either. 
Let them wonder, you thought. I’m done caring about their rumor mill.
- - - -
“Jesus, Eddie.” You gasped and looked around. 
There was no one in the janitor’s closet with you, but still: with that much weed on him, Eddie would be expelled and arrested. You had no idea how he’d gotten it in the two days since your conversation. 
“What?” He asked, out of breath. He’d pulled you in here between third and fourth period, scarring you half to death in the process. “I told you I’d get the stuff.”
“Yeah, but I didn't know you meant so much,” you scoffed. Now, looking down at the green, wooly buds you were going to smoke, you felt your stomach flood with anxiety. You weren’t so sure about it anymore. “Where did you even get it?”
“I know a guy.”
“Fine, don’t tell me,” you rolled your eyes frustratedly. “What did you drag me here for, anyway?”
Eddie furrowed his eyebrows, looking genuinely confused at your hostile tone. 
“To…let you know I got the stuff.” He drawled, before narrowing his eyes at you. “You okay, sweetheart? You look like you’re gonna be sick.”
Your stomach was churning. Between the stuff with Thomas that morning and now this, it was too much. 
You pressed a hand to your abdomen as the faint smell of weed permeated from the open baggie between Eddie’s fingers.
God, he had pretty fingers, you thought somewhere in the back of your mind. It was something you'd revisit when you weren’t about to have a panic attack.
“Woah, woah, woah,” Eddie rushed toward you as you doubled over, hands on your knees, trying to catch your breath and calm the nausea. His hands found your shoulders, and another wave of the sharp smell of marijuana made you retreat further into your mind. 
All of a sudden, you weren’t there; you were back at Starcourt with Billy Hargrove’s hands around your neck, the smell of the weed he’d smoked earlier still on his clothes. 
Your breathing shallowed and you gasped, trying to breathe, but in vain. 
“Hey, hey, breathe for me,” you faintly heard Eddie over your own heartbeat. “You gotta breathe, honey. C’mon, breathe for me. Deep breaths, like this.”
He pressed your palm to his chest as he inhaled deeply.
You looked up at him, at his wide, panicked eyes and did as he said, slowly inhaling a shaky breath. 
“That’s it,” he took another deep breath, eyes not leaving yours. “Just like that. Okay. Another one, now.”
You took a deep breath, much easier this time, eyes never leaving his.
- - - -
“So…” Eddie began, eyes finally meeting yours. “You wanna tell me what the hell that was?”
You sighed, tilting your head back to lean against the wall where you were sitting. You looked up at the fluorescents in the janitor’s closet. 
“That was a panic attack, Eddie,” you said monotonously.
“Don’t be a smart ass. What happened?”
You sighed again. 
It had taken five minutes for Eddie to talk you down from your… episode. After, he’d let you catch your breath. You’d thought that you’d be able to just go about your day from there. You were stupid to think he’d let this go. 
“It’s fine. I’m fine. I’m sorry you had to see that.”
“Jesus, sweetheart, I don't care about that. I just wanna know what the hell caused it. Did I–”
“No,” you said immediately. “You didn’t—”
“Did it have something to do with this morning?” Eddie’s voice was low, and as serious as you’d ever heard it. 
You remained quiet, eyes trained on the light above you. Eddie took that as confirmation. His eyes flashed dangerously as you finally looked at him. 
“I’ll kill him.”
Eddie moved to his feet with purpose, moving to open the closet door. 
“No!” you grabbed his ankle, scrambling. “No, Eddie. It’s not worth it.”
“Bullshit, it’s not worth it—”
“Please, let’s just get out of here. Let’s go smoke. We’ve practically missed all of fourth period anyway.”
“Honey, he can’t just–”
“I know, Eddie,” you stood up level with him. “But right now, I really wanna leave, and that’s more important than whatever revenge plot you have.”
He looked at the door obstinately for another moment before turning back to you. 
“Fine.” he said, not fully convinced. 
“Thank you,” you took a calming breath. “Good. Besides, it’ll be like killing two birds with one stone, right? Two items off the bucket list at once.”
- - - -
Eddie’s car was smoky; a hotbox is what he called it. 
As you took a long drag of the joint he passed to you, the deep, leafy aroma filled your lungs. As you breathed out, all worries or stress you had about school or Thomas or even the Upside Down diminished to an afterthought. 
So this is why people smoke, you thought to yourself, giggling a little bit. 
“What is it?” Eddie turned his head to you, unruly curls brushing your cheek. 
The two of you were sprawled out on the floor of his van, shoulder to shoulder and head to head, about twenty minutes into the session. You’d learned this so far: that Eddie smelled good, like cigarettes and cologne and something musky, and that his eyes got even more glassy when he smoked. All that to say: you wanted to kiss him. Bad. 
You passed him the joint, your fingers brushing his in the process.
“It’s just that I finally get why people do this so much,” you laughed. 
“It’s been twenty minutes,” Eddie laughed with you. 
“And I feel better already!”
Eddie went quiet, taking two puffs from the joint. You turned to look at him, eyes immediately darting to his lips. He was looking pensively at the corner of the van. 
“Not fair,” you grabbed the joint from him. “Don’t hog.”
“I get them too, you know.” He said all of a sudden, somber. 
You stopped, looking at him still. Eddie turned his head to face you, nose only an inch from yours. 
“Not so much anymore, but when I was younger. When I first came to live with Wayne.”
“Wayne?”
“My uncle,” he swallowed, turning his head away from yours. “I live with him. Have since I was twelve. My dad, he was… not a great guy.”
You were quiet for a moment, passing the joint back to him. 
“My dad left.” You said. “Sometimes I’m not even sure I remember what he looks like.”
Eddie grabbed your hand, squeezing. 
Instead of the flutter of anxious butterflies, you felt a calm wash over you at his hand in yours. 
“Do you, uh…” Eddie trailed off, taking a deep huff, “wanna talk about what I saw this morning?”
You sighed, not feeling anxious, but feeling tired. 
“You remember the skirt I wore the other day?”
Eddie swallowed visibly, eyes darting to your legs before your face again. 
“Yeah.”
“Robin helped me pick it out in June,” you fiddled with your sweater. “She convinced me to wear it the other day, finally, while the weather is still at least a little nice. Anyway, Thomas noticed my skirt. He hasn’t left me alone since. And today, he…”
Eddie took a long drag. 
“He grabbed me, grabbed my ass. Fucking pig.” You rolled your eyes. “I’m not even, like, scarred by that. You know how ridiculous that is? That I’m not even phased by it anymore?”
Eddie just shook his head, glaring at the ceiling. 
“Eddie?”
He wordlessly handed you the joint. 
“Toke up, sweetheart.”
You chuckled. 
“Jesus, what an asshole.” 
“Yeah,” you nodded, taking a long drag. 
“Someone should—”
“Someone should, but someone won’t.” You looked at him. “They never do.”
“Hmm,” Eddie hummed, biting his lip in concentration. 
“Wanna skip the rest of the day?”
“God, yes.”
Th next day, Thomas Reed had a busted lip and a black eye. 
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Note
hi :D!!! was wondering if you were still doing matchups? if so, i would like to request a bg3 match up with any of the ladies :3 also i wasn’t sure if i was supposed to describe me or my tav, but its pretty much a self insert so i hope this is ok hehe THANKS AGAIN OK LOVE YOU BYE <3
gender: trans man
pronouns: he/they
sexuality: i honestly have no idea lol, i prefer woman by a longshot though!!!
appearance: i’m 5’8” ish (~173 cm) and about 200 pounds (~91 kilos), olive skin with a bit of facial hair/stubble. i have kinda built arms and legs and a nice loveable tummy. pre top surgery though so i am always in a binder and baggy shirt. i’m growing out my mullet atm so my hair is kind of a mess but! it’s dark brown and curly :) i have lots of tattoos and piercings! my clothing style is usually some giant graphic tee and work pants with some converse or something. if i’m actually trying though, i kind of dress like a grandpa hehe
mtbi: infp, enneagram is either 2 or 4, it changes every time i take it lol
personality: gemini sun virgo moon gemini rising (don’t really care for astrology tbh), initially i am very reserved and quiet, but not like cold or aloof or anything! im just extremely nervous and shy!! i have been described as intimidating but i dont see it at ALL so take that with a grain of salt i suppose. once i’ve opened up though, i really enjoy making others laugh so i will take every opportunity to do so, even if it makes me look like an idiot lol. i tend to miss a LOT of social cues, so i usually come across as very awkward and weird, but i’ve gotten pretty good at playing it off
likes: i LOVE everything about music!! i play over 5 instruments, i listen to every genre (yes even country), and i’ve been playing in either ensembles, orchestras, or bands since i was 11. i was even a music major once upon a time! outside of music, i like cats (my cats are my favorite lol but i don’t discriminate!), video games, and occasionally reading
dislikes: i have pretty bad sensory issues so i fucking HATE places like malls, grocery stores, large department stores, etc. i also don’t like a majority of social situations with people i don’t already know, i always feel so awkward and get anxious. this one really gets people, but i don’t like a lot of foods that are widely considered to be good. for example, i dislike mac and cheese, potatoes, ketchup, and most fruits. every time i tell someone this, they literally act like i just confessed to murder
extra fun fact: i am a giant nerd. like i cannot state it enough I AM A NERD! my friends use me like human google all the time, and most of the time i have the answer 😭 not trying to imply that i’m a genius or something, i just hear a fun fact or random piece of information and then never ever forget it (did you know that for a majority of the year, the closest planet to earth is not venus or mars. it’s mercury!!)
BG3 extra:
race: half wood elf
class: wild magic sorcerer
alignment: neutral good
Don't Worry—I still have yours!! I was perplexed when I saw your PFP twice, lol. Sorry for the long wait, but here is your Match!! Also, as a Midwestern/Southerner, I enjoy the genre of Country, lol. ( I, too, am a nerd; I am my family's personal Calculator, though, lol)
~~~~~ MATCHUPS ~~~~~
Baldur's Gate 3
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Shadowheart
~~~~~ HEADCANONS ~~~~~
Shadowheart is one to keep to herself as well. She likes the mysterious quiet. However, she did not oppose the notion of you being the group's leader.
She sees your anxiety around new people as a hindrance and a diversion. While you are awkwardly talking to others, she can use this time to gather hidden information or send Astarion on a pickpocketing hunt.
Your tics and antics may have frustrated her initially, but as you all grew to know one another, she found them sweet and endearing.
Soon, whenever a passerby points out your flaw, she is the first and last to defend you. (Miss Ma'am always has to get the last word in)
Shadowheart worked hard to earn your trust, and you worked hard to earn hers. Soon, you two were inseparable, for good or bad.
Shadowheart took your courting very seriously and ensured everyone at camp knew you were hers. She is a princess, after all, and gets what she wants.
If you are having a tough day around people, Shadowheart will be there to help. She has no problem leading things whenever you need her to.
When you two fight enemies, it is like watching the ocean move. You two are constantly in sync, and your health never drops below 50.
When you two officially start dating and make it public to everyone, she enjoys holding hands and soft pecks on the cheek. She is still a private person, but no harm in making sure the world knows she loves you.
When you two part ways from the others after the final battle, Shadowheart and you take on a tavern of your own in Baldurs Gate. She runs the finances and shipments while you run the entertainment and bar.
~~~~~ BLURB ~~~~~
The grove had been successfully saved. However, not every person at your party was ecstatic that you had made this choice; however, you knew you had made the right choice. With your camp full of new and old faces, you smiled, knowing that this was what you were made for right then. Though saving everyone was great and all, the loud, drunken party happening was the last thing you cared to participate in. You make your rounds to your companions to tell them when you will pack up and head out; you spot Shadowheart pouring herself a glass of wine. As you finish speaking to Karlach, you stand before the princess of the night.
Shadowheart smiles at you, gently extending a glass to you before speaking, "I knew you weren't quite the party type. I am surprised you even allowed this to happen at our camp." You laugh gently, nodding along, taking a swig of the wine. Looking out on your camp, you may not be one for large gatherings, but this was wholesome for the journey ahead. You turned back to Shadowheart as she spoke again, "We could escape from here for a while, allow you time to have a real reprieve from an intense battle versus throwing yourself into more uncomfortable situations." She always knew when you grew discontent with situations and quickly altered your group's direction. Though you may be the leader, your love and compassion for Shadowheart soon made her your second in command, much to Lazel's displeasure.
You nodded briefly to Shadowheart as she gently grabbed your hand and led you to a rock face far from camp. Privacy was excellent, and it allowed your mind to run freely for once since you were tasked with killing the Goblins. As you lounged back, sipping on the wine, Shadowheart looked at you. A simple conversation between you two led to something more intent and kind through the night. That night, you two decided to flourish in your relationship and walk through life together. Once dawn approached you, Shadowheart sat in your lap, staring out into the horizon. You gently moved some hair from her face. You smiled gently, whispering, "Because of you, my world may now be complete; fight with me, Shadowheart, and let our hearts beat as one once we are free again."
~~~~~ EXTRA ~~~~~
(You and Shadowheart had broken off from the group for the evening, taking a short stroll through Baldurs Gate. Thinking about what the future will have in store for you two as you approach the final battle)
Y/N: Princess, what if a life without Shar is genuinely not what you want. I do not want you to feel forced into a life of tavern-keeping with me.
Shadowheart: My goddess has already abandoned me since the trials. I am content now as long as I have you by my side, my love.
Y/N: When did you become so romantic? Weren't you always the brooding, icy-hearted mystery girl?
Shadowheart: That may have been me in the past, but as I have helped you through your trials, you have helped me, and I am grateful for that.
Y/N: (Smiles softly at the woman and leans in to kiss her)
Shadoheart: (places a hand on Y/N's lips, a large smirk evident on her face) However, since you seem to want to pick on me this evening, I could always return to being a brat.
Y/N: Oh, is that so? I am very sure I can handle it, my sweet. (Sweet kisses intensify)
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mcl-mia · 1 year
Text
A Retainer’s Duty
Word count: 20.4k | Rating: T (some swearing) | Zeus Brundle x Hiro Tachibana (Zeusro)
//this is it. this is my magnum opus. never ask me for anything ever again. 
this is also my favorite thing i have ever written, and has been an on and off process for about 2 years. please be nice to me LOL. this is also INCREDIBLY BEEFY, so do not hesitate to read this in its GOOGLE DOC FORM. as a matter of fact, i’d prefer if you did. there’s pretty colored text in that version and it’s formatted much nicer. 
☆☆☆
A retainer's duty cannot be taken lightly. It cannot end, even when your life's on the line. Your life is that of your liege's. You are completely disposable and replaceable by the nobility above you. Do not overstep your boundaries. 
Know your place. 
Do not become friends. 
Do not fall in love.
All of these things are impossible to do all at once, which was something Hiro had repeated in his own thoughts many times throughout his life. The latter half of the list of the "rules" his father laid out for him have since become null. If anything, love is the most important part of his relationship with his liege. 
Love: because it's hard to not to fall in love with the biggest idiot on the planet.
☆☆☆
Thirteen years together since birth, and things are beginning to change.
"Is that all you've got, Hiro?!"
It wasn't. Hiro won three out of four sparring matches already. He felt bad, and had to let Zeus win at least one. Hiro could go on for ten more matches without breaking a sweat, and Zeus knows this scarily well. 
Zeus, however, was not in as great of shape. Sweat bleeds through his t-shirt, dark as it may be. Zeus' hair is frizzy, his clothes are disheveled, and his breathing is heavy and without rhythm. 
However, his eyes have a fire in them.
Hiro had gone too easy on him, he thinks.
"In general? No. For you? Yes." Zeus pouted, unsatisfied by the fact that Hiro is giving up so readily. "Let's just rest for a bit. You're out of breath, idiot."
"Fine. But, the next round is in ten minutes!"
"Please. In ten minutes you'll be passed out on the ground, and then I'll have to drag you back to your room and have to explain to your sisters that you're not dead."
"I'll be fine. At least sit next to me so you can rest, too."
Hiro was caught a little off guard, but never showed it on his face. Zeus always asked Hiro to rest, and always made sure Hiro was okay as well, but why ask to sit next to him?
"I'm fine. I'm not even tired." Hiro smugly grinned at Zeus, almost teasing him about their physical differences. 
"How lovely. Now sit."
"Whatever."
Hiro dropped down to sit next to Zeus, who had been making the "sit down" motion with his hand the entire time. Hiro debated sitting on his hand as a joke, but the last thing he wanted was to hear Zeus complaining about how he got "ass fingers" because of him.
The grass had a slight crunch to it as the middle schooler sat down, a product of the sun beating down too harsh on it during the past few weeks. "Why not sit in the shade? That tree is literally five feet away."
"Who cares?" Zeus scoffed. "It's not like we're going to get a sunburn. You know that my parents control the weather around the manor."
"Still feels weird."
"You're weird."
"Your face is weird."
"Your MOM is weird."
"No no no, my SISTER is weird."
The two boys laughed at their own bickering, with Zeus falling over from how apparently funny the whole ordeal was. Zeus never found Hiro's sister, Kureha, very fun to be around. Kureha had a scary aura around her, and always threatened to "cut Zeus' hair while he slept" if the two misbehaved.
Zeus stared at the bright sky above them, watching the clouds carefully as if he was studying them, while Hiro thought Zeus was a more interesting subject. 
There was no denying that Zeus, visually, was interesting. His natural pastel blue hair and his dark skin were a stunning combination. His sapphire eyes also complimented his complexion, giving him an almost ethereal appearance. It didn't help that Zeus, despite being in his awkward tween years, was already garnering the attention of many of his peers at school due to his good looks. 
However, not a single one of those admirers know how much of a boisterous idiot Zeus really was. Hiro treasured this knowledge, but also sometimes despised it.
"Lie down with me."
"Another order, your highly-ness?"
"Yes. I think you'll enjoy it."
"If you say so?"
More of the grass was crushed under Hiro's body as he laid down, maybe a little too close to the other boy. Maybe not close enough.
Hiro's eyes wandered from Zeus' face to the sky above, his hands resting on his chest. Dozens of small clouds littered in the bright blue sky above them, but there wasn't nearly enough to call it overcast. 
"Hey, that one kinda looks like a butt."
"Oh my god, you're right! But WHOSE butt?"
"I dunno. Yours?"
"Aw, you think my butt looks that nice?"
"I definitely did NOT say that."
"Let it be known, people of the world: Hiro Tachibana thinks my butt looks like it's as soft as a cloud!"
"You really are an idiot, aren't you!"
Hiro lifted his right hand from its comfortable position on his chest and hit Zeus square in the stomach with his fist. A clean hit, nice and sharp. Zeus let out a small yelp and rolled on his side before the two young boys started laughing once more, amused at their own jokes. While coming down from their laughing high, the boys' hands seemed to fall into one another, as if they'd done this a million times before. Of course, they'd never tell anyone else that. That was their little secret.
Small fingers wove themselves together for the first time. It had always been open palms, one leading the other. Neither initiated it, but neither stopped it from happening. The boys didn't shake their gaze from the bright sky above. The only sounds left after their laughter was the rustling of the trees nearby. The little universe they created between them was peaceful and undisturbed. 
That is, until Zeus let out a daydream-shattering yawn. 
"You're way more tired than you thought, Zeus."
"I'm nooot… 'M just a lil'... hhAAAAAUUUnnnghh… sleep deprived, 's all…"
"Classic excuse. Do you need me to carry you to your bed, your sleepy-ness?"
"Dun make fun 'a me! Jus'…"
"Juuuust?"
"Jus'... stay with… me…"
"...Huh?"
"I said stay with me! Dun make me repeat my… myshelf…."
Zeus rolled slightly over to face Hiro, eyes closed, his movements teeming with drowsiness. Hiro's cheeks started to turn several shades of pink. Zeus would absolutely make fun of him if he actually saw him like this. Against his better judgment, Hiro rolled over to face Zeus as well. Not like he's going to be looking, anyways.
"If it's what you desire, your highly-ness."
"Mmm… thank you, my…. hero…"
Zeus was out like a light, and it didn't take long for Hiro to start getting sleepy as well. 
"My 'hero'... he really is an idiot." Hiro thought briefly.
Hiro’s eyes lingered on Zeus for a moment before he felt them close all by themselves. A small smile crept up on Hiro’s lips as the two drifted off into the world of dreams together. 
Little did they know, but a certain young woman was watching them from afar. She doesn’t dare wake them for dinner.
☆☆☆
Nine years together since birth, and so many things are the same.
It was a grand party that was to be held to commemorate the young lord’s ninth birthday. 
This never came as a surprise to the Tachibana family, as they always participated in the events that the Brundle family had hosted in the past. Hiro, despite being so young, has already heard so much about his family’s ties to Zeus’. So much that he is actually starting to get annoyed by all of the lectures his father gives him during their training sessions.
“Hiro, our family is very important to the Brundle family. We exist to protect them with our bodies, our minds, and our souls.” The lessons from Hiro’s father always start the same. “You and your sister are the next generation of the Tachibana name. Do you remember what it means to be a retainer, my son?”
“It means that we are the shields of the royal family. Our duties never end, even when our lives are on the line…”
“Yes, my boy. And what else?”
“It… means we can’t get close to our lieges. If we are too attached, our thoughts will be bad…”
“Exactly. Do you remember your job today, as every year?”
“Yes, papa. My job is to stay by the young lord’s side all night, and get help if he is attacked, or if he is being stolen away.”
“Yes, my son. Now, go get ready with your sister. The party will begin soon.”
“Yes, papa… but, can I ask you something, papa?”
“Yes?”
“Why can’t I be friends with Zeus and his protector at the same time? I don’t think that Lord Brundle minds... “ 
Hiro’s father knelt down to meet Hiro’s eye level, and placed a large hand on Hiro’s head. “Hiro, you know the answer to that already. You just told me, did you not?”
“Yes, but…”
“But?” His father’s voice lowered an octave. Hiro’s head tilted down in shame for asking. 
“Nevermind, papa. I’m going now.” Hiro gave a small excusatory bow, much like the ones he always saw the servants do in the estate. Closing the door behind him, Hiro left the room to head to the head maid’s room, where his sister, Kureha, was already getting ready.
Not long after Hiro had left the room, Zeus’ own father entered with a small grin on his face. 
“Come now, don’t you think you’re being a little hard on the boy?” Zeus’ father leaned against the door frame, also slightly amused at how Hiro had not taken notice of his eavesdropping.
“You know I cannot be soft on him, my liege. I cannot let him repeat my mistakes.” Hiro’s father glanced downward at his liege’s legs, one of them made of metal and wood. 
“You know that wasn’t your fault.” Zeus’ father adjusted his stance and shifted his weight off of his prosthetic to approach the other man, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Hiro’s father put his hand on his liege’s and let out a deep sigh. 
“I only want him to be careful.”
----
Hiro ran all the way to the head maid’s room, and was completely out of breath by the time he reached it.
“You’re late, Hiro!” Kureha immediately hit him on the head for his tardiness. 
“OW! Blame papa for it, not me!!” 
“Shut it. Late is late. Go tell Miss Olivia that you’re here so she can grab your clothes already!”
All Hiro could do was walk away and stick his tongue out at Kureha, who threateningly grabbed her shoe and prepared to throw it at the young boy. Hiro immediately ran into the head maid’s actual room, only to find that Zeus is still being waited on by the seamstresses on the final adjustments to his coat. 
“Hiro!!” Zeus swiftly shooed away the young maid tending to the hem on the sleeve of his coat and ran up to Hiro, giving him a massive hug. Hiro hugged back. 
“It’s about time you showed up! Do you know how BORED I was without you?!”
“‘Prolly a lot.” Hiro grinned as Zeus pulled away, but Zeus still held on to Hiro’s shoulders.
“Oh, Hiro! There you are!” Olivia snapped up from behind a small, messy work desk, where she did a lot of her embroidery. “Come now, dear, let’s get you all dressed up. Our guests will be arriving any moment now!”
“Yes, Miss Olivia…” Hiro reluctantly removed Zeus’ hands from him. “I’ll see you at the party!”, Hiro whispered to the other boy.
“Yes! Until then!” Zeus waved as Hiro was dragged away to be fitted for his own coat.
----
The party itself was dizzying for such a young boy. Zeus, being the star of the party, was constantly at the center of attention. Family friends, relatives Zeus barely remembers, even strange people who clearly only want to be on Lord Brundle’s good side. Thankfully, nobody outright suspicious-looking has entered the ballroom, as Hiro thought to himself. Despite being so young, Hiro has already been in training to be a full-fledged retainer since he could walk, so it is already very easy for him to spot shifty people in the shadows. 
Hiro was never fond of most people, so he was always close to the young lord, hardly ever speaking to the nobles, unless he was addressed directly… Which wasn't often. Not that Hiro minded, of course. He could always tell which nobles are the “good” ones, and which are the ones that just act good. 
As the night kept dragging on, the golden chandeliers and dark marble floors in the ballroom started to lose their magic for the young boys. The Brundle family always uses magic to change the looks in their ballroom for every large event to suit their aesthetics. Once it was time for dinner to be served, the wizards and Lord Brundle himself adorned the ballroom with many tables. The tables were decorated with long, dark blue tablecloths with horizontal gold stripes around the circumference. In the center of all of them were large glass centerpieces, which looked like two vases stacked on eachother. In the bottom section was a magical candle that burned a blue flame, and on top was a beautiful bouquet of blue anemones, small white lilies, ferns, and gold pearl strands cascading down the sides. At the table for the Brundle and Tachibana families, similar centerpieces adorned the long table, but only had a single tier, and had a long candle sticking out of the top. 
Zeus, of course, was at the center of the table. Hiro always sat next to him, regardless of the function. Zeus’ family lined up on the side next to him, and the Tachibana family sprinkled themselves in between to sit next to their lieges. All for protection’s sake, obviously. 
While everyone else was being served “adult food” (as Zeus and Hiro called it), the two boys had their own dinners that were specially made. As the boys talked between themselves, giggling here and there about the ridiculousness of this whole thing, but never quite loud enough for others to hear, Zeus’ father chuckled to himself while Hiro’s father started to stare daggers at his son’s behavior. Hiro felt a chill in his spine and froze, with Zeus picking up what was happening only a few seconds later. Zeus looked at his own father, who gave him a thumbs up. As people were beginning to finish their meals, Zeus’s father stood and tapped his wine glass with a spoon to garner attention.
“Everyone! Everyone, may I have your attention please?” The crowd of people turns towards the table in the center, staring at Lord Brundle with curiosity. “Thank you, thank you all.” He gives a small bow to the room.
“Tonight is a grand night for our firstborn son, Zeus, and I sincerely thank everyone for being able to celebrate this joyous day in our family.” The ballroom roared with applause, some feeling their egos heightened for being thanked for their presence, while others clapped out of politeness. “Yes, yes. While today is all about our son, Zeus wants us to take a moment and appreciate those who have protected us, and the ones who made this day possible.” Lord Brundle motions to Hiro’s father, and holds his hand out for him to grab and stand up as well, winking at Zeus as he does it. Lord Brundle has done this before, and Zeus knows this to be a distraction. Zeus grabs Hiro’s hand. 
“Let’s get outta here for a bit.” While Hiro’s father was distracted, Zeus and Hiro got out of their chairs and started making their way past everyone. They did, however, stop at Zeus’ mother to let her know that they were “running to the bathroom”, to which she nodded. “Don’t be too long, dear. Don’t forget that we still have the dances coming up!” she grinned. The two boys nodded and grinned back before running off, out of sight from the rest of the guests.
“Everyone, please give a round of huzzahs for the Tachibana family!” was the last thing the two boys heard as they scampered out of the ballroom and out into the rest of the Brundle’s mansion.
----
The two boys eventually found themselves in the western garden, with the gentle moonlight and the soft glow of the magical lanterns illuminating every step they took. 
The western garden is the most classic of the three that surround the Brundle estate, with it being paved with cobblestone and lined with rose hedges that delicately border every pathway. There are a few stone gazebos, benches, outdoor clocks, and fountains that, despite their age, still look brand new. Zeus and Hiro eventually came to one of the gazebos in the center of the garden, giggling the whole way there as they escaped. They considered it their “secret spot”.
“I can’t believe your dad just DID that!!”
“Eh, he does it all the time. He likes you, so he covers for us. Your dad is too mean!”
“Tell me about it. At least you don’t have to live with him.”
“Oh, man, you’re right. Haha!”
The two boys laughed again, their hands still clasped together from running away. Zeus takes a big, long breath, relieved to be away from the party, even though he enjoys the attention.
“You know, it’s nice to get away from those stuck-ups. These parties can be so boooooring!”
“Boooooooring!!”, Hiro echoed.
“At least I have you with me. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you!”
“You'd prolly die of boredom.” 
“I’d prolly die of boredom, yeah.”
This gazebo was a special one, because it wasn’t made entirely of stone. The ceiling was made with a hole that had a thick sheet of glass in place of more stone, which made it perfect for stargazing. The ceiling was also painted with the constellations that make up the Queensblade’s night sky, and gold detailing throughout the rest of the pillars and handrails that connected the top to the bottom.
The two boys stared up through the glass, admiring the clear night sky that always seemed to welcome them. If they turned their heads just right, they could see the full moon shining above them. 
“Hey, do you want to know something that my mom taught me?”
"Uh, okay…?"
"Look at those stars over there. Do you see those shapes?"
"I know what const-ull-ay-shuns are, dummy."
"Y-yeah, but my mom told me about these special ones. Look at those ones!" Hiro pointed to two constellations that were side by side. "Do you see the ones that look like a tail and a triangle?"
"Yeeeeaaaah? And?"
"Well, my mom told me that the tail is called Scorpius, and the triangle is Capricornus."
"So what? They're just stars."
"Well, you were born under Scorpius, and I was born under Capricornus. So, even if we're apart, we'll always be near each other in the stars..." Hiro looked away and blushed, a little embarrassed at what he had just said. Zeus looked at the painting above, and his eyes widened in realization. He turned to Hiro with a look of childlike wonder and happiness.
"So… Does that mean we'll always be together?"
Hiro peeked back over to Zeus and nodded.
"That… is so cool!!!" Zeus leapt up from his stone seat with an unparalleled excitement in his eyes. "If we're always going to be together, then I'll never get sad, because you make me happy!" The boy had the biggest smile on his face, and it was clear that he took those words to heart. Hiro's face got even more red at the embarrassment he had just now realized he subjected himself to, but he smiled back at Zeus nonetheless. 
"Yeah… You… make me happy too! So, we won't ever be sad!" 
The two boys giggled again at their vow. This was their happiness that they had discovered. Not one that was planned out by their parents, not one that was faked by strangers, and definitely not one that was forced by everyone else around them. This was natural.
After a short minute, Zeus looked around and noticed one of the clocks in the garden, and realized something very important.
"AAAHH!!"
"AUGH! Jeez, what is it?!" Hiro had an almost scolding tone for Zeus, who startled him with his sudden outburst.
"The dances!! We need to go back, now!"
"Oh no! You're right, let's go!" Hiro darted from his seat as well, grabbing the other boy's hand and sprinted through the garden. 
Hiro was a little faster than Zeus, so he couldn't go as fast as he wanted, but the two managed to slip back into the party without anyone else noticing that they were gone.
----
As the two came back to their seats, somehow, Zeus' father was still thanking all of the staff that made the party possible. He was finally on the waitstaff, which was somehow the second to last group to thank. Hiro considered how long they were gone, and realized just how many people make these parties happen, and that Zeus' father made it a point to memorize the names of everybody in the Brundle house's service. 
"Please, everyone, one more round of applause for all of our waitstaff this evening!... Yes, thank you all. And last, but most certainly not least, I want to thank every single one of you who gave us your spare time to come and celebrate this momentous occasion with us. While the staff here is an important part of making this possible, we would not be here without all of you!"
The crowd let out another roar of applause, with their egos being stroked. Lord Brundle always had a silver tongue, and he was able to use it so masterfully. It never fails to amuse the rest of the Brundle family when he gets to use it to distract his ever-gullible retainer.
Once the commotion had calmed down and everyone had finished their meals, Lady Brundle announced that it was almost time for the family dances. Zeus was to dance with his mother, father, and some strangers that lined themselves up to get closer to the young heir. Once again, Lord Brundle and some of the other servants used technically simple but flashy spells to convert the ballroom back to being the dance hall it once was. The plates were practically waltzed out of the room and into the kitchen to be washed; the centerpieces on the tables morphed into decorations for the curtains, and some were turned into smaller chandeliers to illuminate the currently barren dance floor. 
As the music picked up again, the two boys silently dreaded their physical separation, even though they wouldn't be far from one another. Hiro decided to try and ease the tension from those thoughts.
"Try not to step on any toes!" Hiro gave a playful nudge to Zeus with his elbow.
"Try not to look creepy on the outside!" Zeus joked back. He seems to be a bit more calm, or at least that's what Hiro thought.
The dances that Zeus had with his parents were practiced rigorously beforehand. Zeus had spent many months already practicing his waltz, and was a quick study. 
The dance with his mother, of course, was one of those waltzes. It was a very formal dance, and it gained many "awws" from the mothers in the crowd, especially because Zeus was so small compared to his mother. But then again, he only just turned nine, so that was to be expected. 
The dance with Lord Brundle, though, was much more lively. This dance was meant to impress, and the Brundle family had even brought in a choreographer to make it both child-friendly and full of pizazz. It was almost reminiscent of a flamenco dance, but every step was brimming with magical effects. Blue rose petals swirled around them at all times while they occasionally performed other fantastical spells to the rhythm. It was a dazzling performance, and it got the crowd cheering once again.
Hiro could only stare at Zeus from the sidelines. After all, there was no "Lord and Retainer" dance, not like he particularly liked dancing. He was fine right where he was. It wasn't long, however, until the planned dances were over, and the guests were free to dance among themselves, and perhaps to let one of their own heirs dance with Zeus. And, of course, many of the guests had their daughters line up to get a chance to dance with him. If this weren't a party put on by the Brundle family, Hiro and Zeus could have made a small fortune by making these young girls pay for a dance. 
"You don't need to look so sad every time he dances with someone else, dummy." Kureha practically came out of nowhere and gave a small karate chop to the top of Hiro's head.
"Ow! Kurehaaaa! Not at the party!"
"Boohoo. Nobody pays attention to us, anyways. We're always just extras at these parties."
"That doesn't mean we can't enjoy them… And what do you mean I look sad?! I'm not sad!"
"Your existence is just sad. So, I just thought you were sad." Kureha had a devilish grin on her face. She was four years older than Hiro, so she had a lot more experience with the parties the Brundle family put on, and was already a lot more mature, even though Hiro and Zeus would tell you a much different story.
"Hmph!" Hiro stuck his nose up and turned away from his sister. "Why are you bothering me, anyways? Shouldn't you be with Lady Brundle?"
"She's talking to the other nobles. Father is with her, and it sounds like they're talking politics, so I left."
"Pawl-uh-ticks? What's that?"
"I dunno, but it was really boring stuff. I hardly knew what they were talking about."
"Uh huh. So you came to bother me, because…?"
"What? I'm not allowed to hang out with my baby brother, who I love soooo much?" Kureha pulled Hiro into a head lock and gave him a noogie.
"Aaah! Kureha, no!" Hiro tried to quickly fix his hair before any of the other servants saw, especially Miss Olivia.
"Haha! Got 'ya!" After her successful attempt at annoying her little brother, Kureha's face softened. "But seriously, though. Are you doing okay? You do look a little sad over here."
Hiro didn't know how to answer her. He didn't feel sad, so why did she think so? But, seeing Zeus over there, having fun with other people was making him feel something. Something he didn't know how to describe.
"I… I don't know."
"You don't know?"
"Well, I don't know if I'm sad. I don't feel sad, but I'm not happy, either."
"How does it feel, then? You can tell me anything, you know."
The young boy had to think for a moment before he answered. "Maybe… um… I think it's like being upset?"
"Upset?"
"Yeah. Even though I know Zeus will be done dancing soon, I just wish he wasn't dancing in the first place."
"What, you think he's a bad dancer or something?"
"No, it's more like.. I just want to be playing with him right now, and not anybody else, you know? And it… kind of hurts that he"s not doing that right now."
A massive lightbulb went off in Kureha's head. This was her first inkling of what was happening, but she won't ever say her thoughts out loud to anyone.
"Well, you can't always have someone to yourself. That's just selfish, and you may end up hurting them if they don't want to do what you want, too." She turned to her younger brother and gave him a gentle smile. "So… just wait for him. If he wants to come back, he will."
"You sound like mom."
"And you listen to mom. So, listen to me for once."
"Maybe." Kureha shot him a slightly threatening look. "But… Thanks, sis. I'll wait."
And so, he did. Hiro waited until every last dance was done from the sidelines.
---
After Zeus had finally worked his way through every girl that wanted a dance, he immediately made his way over to Hiro. How he still had energy in him to walk after over 50 straight dances, Hiro will never know. Maybe his dinner had an energy booster or something.
"Hiro, come on! My mom wants to talk to me!" Before Hiro could even get a word in, he was already being dragged away from his wallflower perch. 
"Wh- okay, okay! I'm coming!"
The two boys worked their way over to Lady Brundle, who was still surrounded by many other guests. Hiro looked around, and noticed that his father was back on the other side of the room with Lord Brundle. He must have known Hiro would be dragged away with Zeus, so he simply went to a new "post". He was always sharp, except for when it came to Lord Brundle's distractions.
"Ah, darling! Thank you for joining us." Lady Brundle welcomed her son and Hiro warmly. "Did you enjoy your dancing time?"
"Of course, mother!" Zeus flashed a large, sweet smile at his mother. He has always been a bit of a momma's boy. 
"Oh, what a charmer!" cooed one of the guests nearby.
"Tell us, dear. Was there anyone you enjoyed dancing with… the most?" Another guest asked slyly. They wasted no time in getting to the point. Lady Brundle hid her annoyance, but she knew this was coming.
"Oh, um… Well, they're all such good dancers. I don't think I like anyone more than the rest."
"My, my! So fair and kind. Milady, your son is already growing up wonderfully!" The first guest spoke up again. While she tried to hide it, it was easy to tell that she was both hurt by Zeus' lack of favoritism, but not discouraged by the even playing field.
"Ah, yes, thank you." Lady Brundle replied. 
"Well, young man," the second guest bent down to meet Zeus' eye level, "you may want to think about a favorite. You just might end up marrying one of those beautiful girls you just danced with!" The second guest gave a big wink to Zeus. Hiro's cheeks grew a little pink upon hearing the adults talk about marriage.
"Oh, come now, darling. He's a little too young to-" Lady Brundle was interrupted before she could change the subject.
"Why would I think about it? I already know who I want to marry." Zeus said bluntly, but still with some confusion. 
The guests squealed at Zeus' bold statement. A choice! A bride in the making! Lady Brundle almost choked on her own tongue out of sheer surprise. She looked at her son like he had just grown five heads.
"Well now, sweetheart! Now you HAVE to tell us who the lucky gal is! We won't tell her, of course."
Hiro could barely believe these women. He wasn't very experienced in these kinds of social matters, but he could tell they all had ulterior motives. 
"Well… When you marry someone, you want to spend forever with them, right? To never be apart from them?" Zeus turned towards his mother.
"Ah, well, yes… To put it simply."
"Then, I want to marry Hiro!"
Zeus' answer was quick, and made the group fall silent. Hiro couldn't believe his ears. Whispers of "Who is Hiro?", "Is that the Tachibana boy?", and "The young lord wants to marry a boy? How unheard of!" made their rounds in the back of the group with the gossip-mongers. The poor, dark haired boy's face was so red from Zeus' proclamation, and he had to look at the floor out of embarrassment. He wasn't upset at Zeus, however. In fact, he felt warmth and joy. 
Lady Brundle shook her head to regain her composure. "Zeus, darling… Are you sure?" 
"Yes!" Zeus replied eagerly.
Lady Brundle approached Hiro, who was still processing Zeus' words. She knelt down to meet his gaze and placed a gentle hand on his cheek to turn the young boy's face to meet her own. Hiro looked at her with red cheeks and a bit of fear in his eyes. "And what about you, Hiro? Do you want to marry Zeus?" She spoke calmly, and without judgment.
"I… I want to marry Zeus, too!" Hiro's mouth moved faster than his brain. He didn't think about it, he just said what he felt. If he got to stay with Zeus forever, of course he'd say yes.
Lady Brundle stood up slowly, and then burst out into a hearty laugh.
"Well, ladies! It looks as though my son has a favorite after all! Looks like you'll have to try again later!" The rest of the guests could not believe what they had just heard, but they laughed along with Lady Brundle. They thought that, maybe, they WOULD try again later. This won't be the last time they see Zeus, of course. And he only just turned nine, so there is a good chance he'll grow out of it… or at least that's what they all thought.
"Well now, dear, go run and get your father. It is almost time for cake!" Lady Brundle winked at her son, who was still confused at why his answer caused so much disturbance among the guests his mother was with. But, cake! Cake is a good distraction. The two boys immediately shifted gears and started running to Lord Brundle so they could finally get the dessert they had been waiting for.
The party had finally settled for the night after cake had been served. Guests trickled out of the Brundle estate slowly, with some of the women looking more disappointed than others. Not to say it wasn't a great time, and Lord and Lady Brundle personally saw every guest off as they left. 
Hiro and Zeus had already snuck off to their secret spot again, with two large slices of cake that they snatched while nobody was looking. They were surprised that there was still so much left, but that just meant more for them, so they were happy about it.
The two boys spent a long time talking about the party and the super ugly people there in between mouthfuls of cake. Zeus was finally able to relax again, and the night was still relatively young. It was only 8 p.m., so well before their bed time. Zeus complained about the stuffy nobles and almost all of the girls he had to dance with.
"She kept stepping on my toes, Hiro! Did you see that?!"
"Yeah! Who taught her how to dance? Wasn't she older than you, too?"
"Ugh, YES! So weird! My feet are going to have so many bruises tomorrow, I swear!"
"We'll need to get you a lot of ice, that's for sure."
"Ugh…" Zeus slumped in the stone bench, visibly exhausted. Who thought it was a good idea to put a nine year old through so much turmoil?
"At least you were there. You're my hero!"
"Uhh… I'm owned by you?"
"No, not… owning. Hero, like how Garuto is a hero of the Foliage Village?"
"OOOOOH! W-well, it was nothin'..." Hiro's cheeks turned red again, and he had to look at the ground again to avert Zeus' gaze. He couldn't help but ask Zeus the burning question he's had since his last interaction with Lady Brundle "U-um.. Zeus?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you… mean what you said to your mom?"
"About marrying you?"
"Yeah…"
"'Course I did! Why?"
"I just… It…" Hiro turned further away from Zeus, trying to hide his red face. "It… made me really happy, but… Why?"
"Well…" Zeus' cheeks also started to turn pink. "Y-you said it earlier! We're never going to be apart, so, that means we'll be together forever! And, well, marrying you is…"
"Huh…?"
"Marrying you means I want to be together with you forever, and I do, s-so of course I mean it!"
Hiro couldn't help but laugh. 
"Wha- Hey! Don't make fun of me!!"
"No, I… I'm not. I'm just… happy."
"Happy..?" 
"I want to stay with you forever, too, so…"
Zeus perked up when Hiro spoke those words, and his eyes sparkled. He grabbed Hiro's hands excitedly and whipped Hiro around so he could see into his eyes.
"Do you mean it?" Zeus was uncharacteristically serious. Hiro wasn't used to this.
"...Why wouldn't I?" Hiro replied nervously. He looked into Zeus' sapphire eyes, and noticed the warmth of Zeus' hands around his. He didn't quite understand what exactly he was feeling when he did, and his face was still flushed.
"Pinky promise?" Zeus let go of Hiro's right hand and extended his pinky finger. Hiro looked at Zeus' hand, and his face softened for a moment.
"Pinky promise." Hiro wrapped his pinky around the other boy's tightly. 
"Then it's settled! When we're older, we'll get married!" Zeus beamed, and Hiro had never seen Zeus this happy. He couldn't help but smile.
This was their happiness. Nobody could take this from them. This promise is theirs to have. Whether it is kept or not doesn't matter right now, but they just know that everything will end up okay.
☆☆☆
Twenty three years together, and things couldn't be any more different.
Sunlight peeks through the curtains of a night class dormroom on a lazy day off. Zeus and Hiro are still asleep in their beds as their blackout curtains are seemingly failing at their jobs. It's almost eleven in the morning, but this is just the routine for a student in the night class.
Zeus is the first one to pop his eyes open, letting out a massive yawn as his body adjusts to being awake. He rubs his eyes and looks over at Hiro, who looks like he hasn't even turned over in the night. Zeus debates on holding up a mirror to his nose to check if he's even breathing, but he's done that before. He then remembers the consequences of doing that, and ultimately decides against it. Instead, he decides to take a nice shower and go through the rest of his morning routine. He doesn't wake Hiro directly, but he's sure Hiro will give him an earful for starting the "stupidly loud shower" while he's still sleeping. It's a risk he'll have to take.
Not long after Zeus starts the shower, Hiro's eyes peel open. Although he notices the shower is on, he's way too groggy and sleepy to care. He sits up in his bed and stares at the dorm, which is covered in a lot of memories from their past few years at Gedonelune Academy. Hiro never understood why, but Zeus was one of those people that wanted pictures of almost every major event that they experienced at the academy. Every single one of them also has little notes written on them, most of them in Zeus' handwriting, but not all. There's a picture of their first day at the academy, when Headmaster Randolph stepped down, when Zeus and Hiro first became prefects, and so many other memories made with the other friends they've made while at the academy. There's even a photo of them chasing after their friends, Liz and Leslie, for… reasons Hiro and Zeus don't wish to speak about. Hiro always thought that was a memory Zeus didn't want on the wall, but Zeus insists on having it "so he doesn't forget what he felt that day", whatever that means.
Still barely processing his surroundings, Hiro slowly makes his way to the kitchenette in their room and starts preparing some much needed coffee for the two of them. Thankfully, the Night Class dorm rooms were nice enough to have such a thing so they didn't have to go all the way down to the communal kitchen every single time. Once the coffee is done brewing, Hiro starts preparing Zeus' cup first. Zeus prefers his coffee with a lot of creamer and sugar, so it has to be warmed back up. He then starts pouring his own… with just as much creamer, but not as much sugar. He thinks that the creamer is sweet enough, especially since they got a cinnamon roll flavored one this time. Hiro's lips curl into a smile as he remembers the debate the two had at the grocery store. 
Now slightly more caffeinated, Hiro goes to make his bed and grab some clean clothes for when Zeus eventually comes out of the shower. Zeus can take a long, long time in the shower, so Hiro decides that he'll get some morning exercise in while he waits. He turns on a speaker on top of his dresser and starts playing some of his favorite bands, then goes immediately into his stretches. He hums along to some of the songs as he continues to stretch as "Honey, Gravity Is Working Right" and "Greetings to the Dark Gray Street Performers" play right after one another, which pleases his inner middle schooler. He then starts doing what should seem like an unnatural amount of push-ups, taking some extra sips of coffee in between reps. Despite his daily workouts, Hiro has always had muscle, but it never really shows. His abs are more defined, sure, but his arms almost always look like toothpicks. He debates on whether or not to bulk up, but decides not to in favor of having the element of surprise. Always better to be underestimated than overestimated, according to his father.
When Hiro starts working up a sweat, Zeus finally comes out of the bathroom. 
"It's about damn time." Hiro chided playfully. When he got up, he then noticed that Zeus only had a towel on. Hiro immediately turned away to gather his own clothes and speaker, a small blush across his cheeks.
"Aw, boo hoo. It's not my fault you don't wake up first." Zeus smirked and went to the microwave to retrieve the coffee he knew would be waiting for him. 
"You can always wake me up, you know."
"Noo-ho-hoooo way! Not anymore!" Zeus takes a big sip of coffee, smiling at how good Hiro makes it. "You are WAY too scary when I wake you up. The way you glare at me makes me feel like my life is in danger!"
"Your life is always in danger with me around." Hiro smirks and heads to the bathroom, still trying to avoid eye contact with Zeus. 
"Hey! It should be the opposite, you bastard!!" 
Hiro gave a nonchalant wave to Zeus before closing the bathroom door and locking it, finally having a truly private moment to himself. After turning on the shower to warm it up (and thanking the gods that the dorms have infinite hot water), Hiro paces over to the mirror, looking himself in the eyes and slapping his cheeks. "Get. A. Hold of yourself!" he whispers to himself, his face growing even more red the more he thought about Zeus.
These feelings weren't new, per se, but they have been difficult for Hiro to understand. Once puberty was in full swing for the two, things just started getting so… different. Zeus got more and more popular, and Hiro started to feel like he was growing further away from him, even though he was always at his side. Their physical intimacy had lowered, too, so every touch felt like fireworks. Hiro thought it was bad at first, and that it was more like burning. However, after the incident where Zeus almost lost his life to a fierga, and after Hiro was possessed by the BBW… He realized that it was a different kind of burning. Instead of a raging forest fire, it was more like a calm bonfire where you roast marshmallows on a clear summer night. Hiro just couldn't quite understand why he was feeling that way with Zeus. He never stopped to think about why, but he knew that Zeus had begun to annoy him in their later years. However, it wasn't in a bad way. After all, if it was that bad, why was he still there, right where he has been for the past twenty three years? 
Hiro mulled over these thoughts while the hot water rushed down his face and body, hoping that the steam would help clear his head. 
Zeus, on the other hand, was still working on his coffee and scanning his closet for the perfect outfit. Something comfortable, but different enough from his usual outfit. He mumbles a quick incantation to show him what the weather outside the academy is like. A nice, slightly warm spring day and a clear night. A perfect day, if you will. He smiles and pulls out some lighter clothes. He settles for a dark blue v-neck tee, tight black jeans that have pre-made distressing, dark brown lace-up boots, gray knit crew socks, and an oversized cream knit cardigan. He also pulls out his favorite pair of sunglasses: circular, reflective blue lenses with gold detailings and a gold, detachable chain. Even Hiro likes this pair, despite not being a huge sunglasses person.
"Perfect." He whispers, pushing up the sleeves of his cardigan to his elbows. He also pulls out a couple of rings, putting them on their respective fingers. Finally satisfied with his choices, he also fishes out a dark brown satchel and throws a couple things he thinks he'll need for the day: his Wolaroid camera, extra film for said camera, photo holder, lip balm, tissues, a small velvet box that he keeps in there just because, etc.
It's at this point Zeus hears the shower stop, and he goes to open the door to the patio and lets some fresh air in (and lets his eyes adjust to the sunlight). Zeus steps out onto the balcony, taking a deep breath. A small wind tickles his nose for a second, which causes him to exhale much more violently than he wanted.
Hiro comes out of the bathroom not long after, fully clothed unlike his roommate, and notices that a half full coffee cup is sitting next to Zeus' closet. Hiro grabs it and his own cup, then slides on a pair of slippers before joining Zeus on the balcony.
"You can just tell me if you don't like my coffee, you know." Hiro jokes as he hands Zeus the cup.
"Ahh, I knew I was forgetting something!" Zeus grabs the cup gingerly. "I forgot to tell you that your coffee tastes like ass."
"Well, I guess I asked for that."
"That you did."
"Then again, how exactly do you know what ass tastes like?" Hiro side-eyes Zeus smugly, taking a sip.
Zeus retaliates with an even more smug grin.
"���ツを食ベる."
Hiro nearly chokes on his coffee.
"NO. No! Who the hell taught you that?!"
"Randy said it, Azusa told me what it meant and how to say it properly."
"He actually told you how to say 'I eat ass' in proper Hinomotan?!"
"I'm always full of surprises, aren't I?"
"Oh my god. Oh my god, actually." Hiro buries his face into his free hand, shaking from trying not to burst out laughing. Trying to compose himself, Hiro notices that burning feeling in his chest again. He eventually shakes it off, and looks back over the balcony. Zeus turned to Hiro and broke the chaos. 
"Anyways, I've decided that we're going into town today."
"You decided? I have no choice?"
"Nope. I need you to perform your retainer duties."
"Whatever. Anywhere in particular?"
"Well, Jay mentioned that there is a new café that she thought we'd like, and today just so happens to be nice out, so…"
"You wanted an excuse to spend your allowance."
"Exactly!"
The two shared a look and chugged the rest of their drinks. There wasn't a lot left, but it's the thought that counts. After leaving the cups in the sink, Hiro went to put on his usual boots. In fact, he was dressed much more plainly than Zeus. A band tank top, dark blue jeans, a black and white flannel tied around his waist, his usual belts, and a crystal necklace that Zeus got him a long time ago. It was comfy, and that's all that mattered to him. Once he was done lacing up, he grabbed his katana and tied the scabbard around his less decorative belt. Zeus waited by the door and grabbed their dorm keys.
"Are you ready yet?"
"Yes, your highness."
Zeus glared at him. "I thought I told you to stop calling me that." Was it just Hiro, or was Zeus blushing a bit?
"I'm allowed to rebel against my liege if it's for their benefit."
"Very funny. Let's get going!" 
The trip into town was always a bit of a walk, but all of the students were grateful for how close the town was overall. 
It wasn't long before the two found themselves on Main Street, the town bustling with students and families on such a nice day off. Zeus pulls out a note from their friend Jay, which has the address of the café she recommended. Thankfully, it wasn't far off from where they were. Following that trail, they work their way to a quaint café that has wisteria flowers creeping up the side of the building and hanging over the entrance. The iron and wood sign above read "Café Selune". That's definitely the name she scribbled on the paper.
"Oh hey, dorks!"
Speak of the devil.
Turning towards the voice that called out to them, there stood Jay Abbey. It took them a moment to recognize her, mostly because she was out of uniform and had a completely different hair color than her normal light blue.
"Oh, hey, Jay! What are you doing out?"
"I'm heading down to my dad's wand shop for a visit. I see you're already checking this lovely little café…?"
"W-well, you have good taste sometimes, so I thought we'd get a bite to eat while we're out!"
"But, this was the only thing you said you wanted to do?"
Zeus froze, his ears turning red.
"A-anyways! What's with the hair change? Did you dye it last night or somethin'?"
"Yeah, the white looks nice, but it's weird seeing you without the blue."
"I hate to break this to you guys, but the white is my natural color. I normally use magic to make it blue. If I didn't, I'd never get the dye out." Jay raised an eyebrow and glanced at Zeus.
"Actually… While I have you, Zeus, could I talk to you for a sec? I have some, uh, questions about your lesson from last week!"
"I… guess? Can't it wait until tomorrow, though?"
"Nope. Right now. Alone. I don't have much more daylight left if I'm gonna see my dad!"
Jay grabbed Zeus by the arm and practically dragged him away by force. Hiro would have followed if he didn't have a reason to trust her, but he does. Jay has been a great friend since the Night and Day classes merged, and she's one of the few people who can actually spar with Hiro. She's a bit of a hothead like Zeus is, though, so it's a miracle how THEY have gotten along. Regardless, Jay took Zeus just out of earshot, although she looked almost excited about something? He wonders what questions she had, but last week's lessons were about summoning magic, which was not Hiro's area of expertise. Actually, Jay and Zeus had been talking in private pretty often, and Hiro wasn't entirely sure why. There was something off about what she had said to get him over, but…
"Phew! You're the best. I'll be sure to return the favor later."
"Haha… Anytime?" Zeus seemed a little dazed as they walked back, but not completely out of it. Hiro had seen this before, was she raking him over the coals about something?
"Ah, damn! Look at what time it is! I gotta run, but I'll see you guys tomorrow!" And just as swift as she arrived, Jay sped off into town, giving them a wink and a wave as she disappeared into the packed streets.
"... And there she goes."
Zeus gave a relieved sigh.
"She can be such a damn thorn in my side, I swear!"
"What was all that about, anyways?
"Oh, uh, she just had a question about one of the summoning formulas. She said she couldn't read my writing." Zeus' ears had turned red again, and he scratched the side of his nose. Hiro knew instantly that he was lying, but decided against pursuing why. He felt a pit form in the bottom of his stomach, and wasn't sure where this anxiety was coming from.
"What, were you afraid she was asking me out on a date or something?" Unbeknownst to the both of them, Zeus' joke was right on the money.
"Absolutely not. Nobody would want to go on a date with you, King Kook." Hiro turned on his heels and walked into the café.
"Hey!! At least wait for me, Hiro!"
The inside of the café was just as beautiful as the outside. Exposed dark bricks juxtaposed a large window that let in tons of natural light. There were still string lights that had ivy intertwining with them that hung from the ceiling, likely giving the building a soft glow in the evening. The black metal tables and chairs furthered the overgrown modern city aesthetics as well, seeing as though the rest of the place was almost covered with plants. The two took a seat at a booth closer to the entrance, which had even more wisteria growing around it. Contemplating the menu was tough, as everything on it sounded amazing. They eventually decided to split a large brunch platter while getting separate drinks. Zeus ordered a cranberry and ginger ale soda, while Hiro ordered a blue raspberry ice cream float. Zeus made a snide comment about Hiro wanting something so sweet early in the day, and Hiro quickly shut him down by making fun of choosing to willingly drink ginger ale. 
"I can see why Jay likes this place already, though."
"Oh, yeah. This is totally up her alley. I feel bad for the people with pollen allergies, though."
"Well, there was a sign saying that all of the plants here are on a strict pollen watch, so unless you touch one, you should be fine."
"Huh! I totally missed that."
"Well, the sign was as small as your brain, so I can see why you missed it."
"Ouch. I take you out somewhere nice, and all I get in return are insults? I'm hurt, Hiro."
"You make it sound like I can't go somewhere on my own."
"Never said that. All I'm asking for is a little gratitude when I take you out somewhere like this!" Zeus jokingly stuck his nose in the air and crossed his arms. Hiro chuckled.
"Fine. Thank you, my liege, for allowing me this humble opportunity to dine with you." 
"Eugh. You sound like your dad."
"Ask and ye shall receive."
"Very funny." Zeus started taking out his camera, then went up to the hostess to ask whether or not it was okay to take photos, then headed back to the booth.
"Did they say yes?"
Zeus grinned, slinging the camera's strap around his neck. "Yep. They even asked for one." He held the camera up and took a few photos of their immediate surroundings, trying to get a close up of the flowers around them. Zeus found a lot of beauty in the wisteria around the two of them, but also made sure to snap a few pictures of Hiro as well. Hiro doesn't mind at this point, since he's so numb to Zeus' antics. Zeus looks down at the last picture he took, which was of Hiro candidly staring out the window, with the flowers casting small shadows over his face. He was beautiful, and Zeus smiled at the photo.
"Are you done yet?" Hiro turns his attention from outside to the server bringing them their food, and giving the server a small thank you as he grabs the plates and immediately goes for the fruit salad bowl and picks out the honeydew.
"Uh, never." Zeus retorts sarcastically as he starts to put the photos in the special photo holder he put in his satchel earlier, but leaves one out so he doesn't forget to give it to the hostess before they leave. He then reaches for the honeydew that Hiro has been picking out. "Are you done with that fruit salad? I might want some fruit other than your leftovers, you know."
"Touché." Hiro sets down the small bowl and moves his attention to a few slices of toast and the small pile of scrambled eggs. He takes some of the eggs and places it on top of the slice of toast after he butters it and takes a large bite, and his eyes widen at how good it is. Hiro doesn't always get to eat it, and is reminded of how breakfast food rules. The toast is perfectly crispy, the butter is soft and flavorful, and the scrambled eggs are surprisingly creamy. Zeus holds in a chuckle when he sees Hiro's expression. It was like he was a little kid again, and it's… not a look Zeus gets to see very often. He thinks about taking his camera out again to take a picture of Hiro, but his stomach is overruling that idea. 
Two drinks, half an hour of small talk and banter, and the entire platter of food later, the two begin to settle from their meal. When they get to the last few bites, Hiro speaks up and asks the question that's been lingering in the back of his mind.
"So… What else did you want to do today?'
Zeus half chokes on his mouthful of bacon. "W-well… Did you want to do something else today?"
Hiro gives him the look. "Don't play coy. You said to Jay, and I quote, that you 'wanted to get a bite to eat while we were out'. You have something else planned."
"Ugh…" Zeus swallows and hangs his head in defeat. "You're too sharp sometimes."
Zeus turns his head away from Hiro shyly and averts his gaze as his cheeks shift softly to pink. "There's… There's a fireworks show tonight. I thought it would be a nice surprise if we went, since we have the day free 'n all."
Hiro was stunned. He's not used to Zeus actually thinking out surprises like this. His mind flashes back to his birthday "gifts", like the Eastern Dragon, the Laughing Frog, and then the cards that he and everyone else made him. He still has those, actually. Then it hits him: there was no way he thought of this on his own. He's way too stupid.
"... You could have just asked me to go, then. I would have said yes." Hiro sighs and rests his face on his right hand. He averts his eyes from Zeus.
"That completely defeats the purpose of it being a surprise, idiot."
"Whatever. What time does it start?"
"Uh… 8, I think."
Hiro then looks at the clock on the wall of the café. It's 1 p.m. already, so they have plenty of time before then. Hiro puts the last few bites of hash browns in his face and chugs the rest of his float.
"Well, as lovely as this place is, we can't stay here forever. We have time to kill, so where else do you wanna go?"
Zeus also downs the rest of his soda and covers his mouth when a burp escapes him. "Why don't we go shopping?"
Hiro's eyes narrow. "You really want to spend more of your allowance?"
"I can do what I want!"
"Fine, but if your parents cut you off, it's not my problem."
"Nah, mom wouldn't do that. Dad only would if your dad says he should, and that hasn't happened yet."
"Uh huh. Sure."
The two collect themselves and their items once they're done paying for their meal. Zeus leaves them a generous tip and hands the photo to the hostess, who smiles and thanks him for it. As they leave the shop, a petal from the flowers outside gets picked up by the wind and lands on top of Zeus' head. Hiro chuckles and picks it off, which makes Zeus laugh as well while they make their way towards the shopping district. 
The city of Gedonelune is always bustling with people, and the shopping district is no different. Sometimes it feels like there are as many shops as there are people. People from all over the world come to sell their wares in the capital city, from magical items, to clothing, even to rare magical creatures in some unsavory places.
Hiro watches the people that go by like a hawk - as there is never a time where he is allowed to relax from his duties as a retainer. After all these years he's spent by Zeus' side, Hiro has thankfully only had a few run-ins with “ne'er do wells” and “rogues” who would wish him or his family harm. In fact, most of the time they are both stopping a cut purse here or there. Hiro never likes the danger it poses to Zeus, but he knows that Zeus is a capable wizard in his own right. Zeus never has to worry while he’s out, unless Hiro isn’t with him.
As the two galavant around the town, Zeus has them stopping in almost every shop on the main strip. Clothing stores, magical items, jewelry, you name it. Hiro feels himself growing more tired with each and every department store he gets dragged into, but Zeus appears to be having the time of his life. Not spending as much as Hiro thought he would, but the clothes he tries on and the items he admires sparks a small well of emotion in him. It’s like Zeus is a kid in a candy store, and Hiro finds that almost… cute. 
“Hey, Hiro!”
Zeus’ shout snaps Hiro back to reality. 
“Hm? What is it?” Hiro rubs one of his eyes and yawns. Then he notices the absolute massive pile of clothes in the royal’s arms, and sighs as he knows what’s coming next.
“I’m going to be in the dressing rooms for a while. Feel free to roam around, though - this place has some great stuff!” Zeus’ grin is almost mischievous, like he knows he’s going to take a while. Hiro shifts his gaze to the racks to humor the other man. None of the clothes in here are his style.
“Maybe I will. Don’t take too long, though. You’ve been dragging us so… HAAAAAAUUHHH… long that it’s already 6:30. If you want good seats for this mysterious firework show, we’ll want to be there early.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’ll only be a minute, mom.” Hiro’s eyes narrow at that comment. “Don’t fall asleep on me, though! I don’t want to have to wake you up from that. You’ll sour the whole thing.”
“Uh huh.”
As Zeus zips into the dressing room, Hiro immediately flops down on one of the very comfy looking couches that are in front of the room Zeus has camped inside and spreads his weary legs and takes a deep breath. He leans his scabbard on his chest so it’s not as uncomfortable to relax. He fiddles with the charms on the hilt of his sword, but it doesn’t take long before his exhaustion catches up with him. He hangs his head down and closes his eyes, the noises of Zeus in the changing room and the faint music from the speakers in the store drowning out as he falls asleep, and dreams of a memory.
☆☆☆
Fifteen years together, and things are a little crazy right now. 
Playful whispers and quiet laughter fills the hallways of the Brundle estate. It is homecoming night of two boys’ freshman year in highschool, and they have definitely been up longer than they are supposed to have been. After dancing their hearts out at the dance itself, there was a party hosted by a senior that included probably too many things that would be considered dangerous for slightly sheltered teenagers, so of course they had to partake in a little bit of it. Only a little so their parents don’t get suspicious, but certainly enough to have a little unsupervised fun. It’s very late in the night as the two return, although not unexpected from their parents. Hiro’s father, of course, protested such a late curfew, but Zeus’ father overruled it as “Hiro will be with them, Spring of their Youth”, and a whole lot of other things that swayed the stoic retainer into a more lenient state of mind. 
Zeus, of course, ended up being the more popular of the two boys, both at school and the party. It happened almost on day one, even. Puberty was hitting the two boys particularly hard - and boy did it his Zeus like a truck. Hiro became more known as Zeus’ shadow, and is mildly popular by default for it. Zeus could never tell if it was because people actually liked him, or if they wanted to get in good graces with his family. He found it all rather shallow, but didn’t mind the attention nonetheless. Both at the dance itself and the party, girls (and some boys, even) lined themselves up for a chance to simply talk to the young royal. Hiro didn’t like any of it, but he was enjoying himself at least a little bit in seeing Zeus be so popular. Hiro kept towards the back, but rarely left Zeus’ side. Or, at least a 30 ft radius of him. He participated in some of the games that were going around, but he doesn’t really remember all of what was said, or even what was played. He does remember that a senior spiked the punch with alcohol at some point, which he immediately noticed. Zeus, thankfully, managed to grab his last cup before it was spiked, so he didn’t have to drink any of it. Some of the seniors tried pressuring him into doing so, but Zeus really knew how to shut that kind of thing down. He never caught on to the fact that someone spiked it, though, Zeus just thought they were being weird. It also helped that Hiro shot a searing glare at anyone who persisted, and was quick with his magic when others tried to add a little extra into Zeus’ drink. Other than that, the boys had been enjoying their time, mingling with the others and staying out way later than they should have. When the time comes for them to leave, the two are in a daze over their first real, actually peer-ran party. No adults, just people their own age. It was exhilarating, but also exhausting. The two flew on their hoverboards all the way home, speeding down the quiet, dark streets of Queensblade as the cool night breeze brushed against their smiling faces.
The way Hiro remembers the way home is a little hazy, but he does remember having to sneak into the manor and running through the hallways, Zeus’ hand on his as they work their way through the lavish halls. Moonlight spills through the large windows, yet Hiro only has tunnel vision for the boy in front of him. Everything else is a blur of dull golds and silvers, colorful paintings and vases become splotches of color as the faint candlelight lights their way through the halls. He can’t tell if it’s the small taste of freedom he had at the party, or if he’s just a little too sleep deprived, but his focus on Zeus is just… different, than what he’s used to. Like he can’t explain it. Maybe it was because he had to focus on him all night, he thought. 
The two eventually find their way back to Zeus’ room, and the two immediately collapse on the young royal’s bed, awkward hands still intertwined. They’ve been doing this quite a bit now, holding each other’s hands. It always feels so natural between them when it happens, too, as if they don’t even have to think about it. Always in private, though - never in front of others. 
Hiro can barely remember how the conversation started, but he remembers where it ends up. It’s not something he could ever forget.
“It’s so strange. Are… parties always like that? That was so different from any of the ones we’ve had here.”
“I know what you mean. It felt like a different world out there. It’s really, really weird.”
“Yeah… But, ugh, some people were being so weird about the punch at the end there. ”
“Hah, yeah… I never expected anyone to actually spike it.”
“What.”
“What do you mean, ‘what’?”
“Someone. Spiked it? As in, like, drugs? Did I almost eat a drug?!”
“No, you moron! Alcohol. Likely vodka, I think. I don’t know, something that’s clear and works fast, I guess.”
“Uuuuuughhhh. No wonder why people wanted me to drink more of it.”
“There were quite a few people out to get you for that.”
“Yeah, don’t think I didn’t notice that part. Although…”
“Hm?”
“I guess… no, nevermind.” Zeus’ grip tightened on Hiro’s hand. 
“Go ahead, say it. You can tell me.”
“It’s just… I dunno. There were a lot of upperclassmen there, and a lot of them seemed to be weirdly into me. I just thought, you know… If something were to happen between, you know, me and one of them…”
“That’s… a weird thing to think about when some of them were definitely trying to get you drunk off your ass.”
“Hey, to be fair, I thought they might have been trying to be nice! And you know, some of them were kinda hot.”
“Oh my god, you CANNOT be serious!”
“But what if!!”
“What if nothing!” Hiro lets go of Zeus’s hand for the first time in what must have been over an hour. He leaps up from the bed and stands in front of Zeus, arms crossed and now looking very sternly at the other boy. “What could you possibly hope to think about the ‘hot’ people who were trying to take advantage of you?!”
“Okay, well let’s say, hypothetically-” Hiro narrows his eyes. Zeus sits up, starts to sweat and can’t meet Hiro’s eyes. “If, for some reason, they weren’t doing that, and, uh… You know, if, maybe… Maybe something happened between us…”
“Zeus.”
“I don’t know, I guess I’m just nervous that because I haven’t DONE anything, uh… You know. Romantic? S-sexual?” Hiro softens his gaze, and drops his arms. “If… If I made a fool of myself, and then they told everybody about it…”
Hiro sighed and sat back down. 
“You… really are an idiot.” Hiro’s face flushed at the idea of Zeus being… “together” with anyone else. He doesn’t know why he feels that way, but something deep inside of him felt like it would be wrong. He also doesn’t know why he says what he does next.
“You could… you could always practice with me, you know.”
It was hard to see in the dark bedroom, but both of their faces had turned as red as can be. Zeus looked so shocked at Hiro, and Hiro was so sure that he had just ruined everything. He doesn’t even know why he said it! Did he even mean it? Was it even okay for him to mean it? All of these thoughts rushed through his head.
“Uh…”
And there it was. “I-I’m sorry. I…” Hiro felt his world crashing down. Out of sheer embarrassment, he turned away from Zeus and curled up into a ball. He felt his head and heart pounding. Silence fell in the bedroom for the first time, and Hiro hated every second of it. Hiro contemplated just getting up and leaving right then and there, but he could barely move. 
“Do you… mean it?”
Zeus’ soft, almost eager voice was the first to break the silence. 
“I… don’t know. I…”
“Hiro. You can be honest with me, too.”
“I… I want to be.”
Zeus reached a hand out and placed it on Hiro’s shoulder. His hand was gentle, nervous, even. “You want to be?”
“I just… Would it be okay, you know, if I said that I did mean it?” Hiro barely understood what was happening with him. What has come over him? And why now? What the hell is so different for him to be so bold with the person who he cares most for? 
“I-I don’t think I’d be okay with anyone else, weirdly enough… So, u-um… Yes. Yes, I, uh, think that it, um, would be okay.” Zeus turned his head away, his face still flushed as he spoke. 
Hiro shifted his body to once again face Zeus, his eyes wide. Were those tears he felt, as well? Hiro’s face was too hot to feel anything, and it was too dark for Zeus to tell. 
“I… okay. Yeah. Okay.” Hiro wiped his warm cheeks, just in case. He has never felt so relieved in his life. Even if this is just for the night, even if they both forget it by the morning, or act like it never happened, Hiro won’t forget it. 
The room fell silent once again, the two boys avoiding eye contact. It was awkward. Very, very awkward. Somebody had to break it.
“Do you want to practice now?” 
Spoken in unison, they turned to finally look each other in the eyes, almost fearful of the other’s answer. 
“Oh- Uh..”
“No, no, uh, sorry…”
“No, no it’s okay! Um.” Hiro took a deep breath. “Hoo. Okay. Okay. Let’s just, uh, start over.”
“Y-yeah! Okay. Starting over. Right now.”
“Yup. Right now.”
Hiro took another deep breath, this time making a motion with his arms to center his breathing, much like his father taught him before. Zeus copied him, then took Hiro’s hands in his own, holding them as if he was holding a treasure. 
“Okay… Hoo.” Zeus was staring hard. “Hiro, w-would you like to practice… now?”
Hiro nodded, shifting his eyes to his and Zeus’ hands for a moment.  “Alright. U-um…”
“W-what is it?”
“I-I… I’m going to kiss you now.”
“Right now?”
“Y-yes! Don’t make this any harder than it needs to be!”
“I-I’m not trying to!”
“Well talking isn’t making it any easier!!”
“Well then just do it already, you idiot!!”
“Argh, just, shut it!” Zeus moved his hands and cupped Hiro’s cheeks, moving his face closer to Hiro’s. Hiro closed his eyes and braced for impact.
When their lips finally came to meet, it wasn’t great. Zeus just kind of pressed his lips on Hiro’s and stayed there for a little while. The only other sound in the room was their heartbeats racing. After a brief moment, Zeus pulled away, still keeping his face close to Hiro’s, foreheads almost touching.
“U-um. How was that?”
“... You could use some work.”
“What do you mean, use some work!? I’m doing my best here!”
“Here, look.” Hiro grabbed Zeus’ chin, adjusting his jaw so Zeus’ lips would be slightly parted. “Keep your lips slightly parted. Relax your lips, you’re way too tense.”
“You make it sound like you’re an expert.” Zeus huffed. 
“Hush. Now, when you kiss, offset your lips from theirs just a little.” Hiro was nervous, but leaned in again. “Like this.” This time, with Hiro taking the lead, it was much better the second time around. Well, better for two kids who have never kissed anyone else in their entire lives aside from pecks on the cheek for family. Pulling away for small breaths here and there, the two kept “practicing” for… quite a while. The kisses did get better every time, and the one kiss turned into 10, 20, what must have felt like 100. If this were a cheesy teen romance movie, this would be where the camera circles around them with every kiss. Their kisses also got sleepier over time as well, the two climbing on each other and back fully on the bed. Their hands wandered never too far down, but just enough to either keep balance and to gently hold the other when the time called for it. The two eventually found themselves laying down, bodies entangled so tenderly and innocently. It wasn’t long until the two eventually got worn out, and started drifting off to sleep after a long night. By the time morning would come, Lord Tachibana would not find his son in his own room. By the time morning would come, this would be first and last time doing anything like this. No more practices.
Hiro laid on Zeus’ chest, arms grasping Zeus’ shirt softly, Zeus’ arms wrapped around Hiro, one hand intertwined in Hiro’s soft raven hair. It feels as though this was a dream, one Hiro doesn’t want to wake up from.
☆☆☆
“OI, HIRO!!”
And then he does. 
“Yeesh, it’s about time! I’ve been trying to wake you up for, like, five minutes now!”
Hiro peeled his eyes open much like he did when he woke up the first time today, his face a grimace from being woken up so harshly. 
“Good.” He growls as he sits up, rubbing his eyes. “Are you finally done?”
“For your information, technically yes, but it’s already 7:45! You have been asleep for over an hour!”
“And you’ve been in the dressing room for over an hour?!”
“Details details, we have to go!” Zeus grabbed Hiro’s wrist and pulled him up, practically bursting out of the shop. Hiro had to act fast or else he was going to lose his sword in the store.
“Ack- Zeus! Will you slow down?!” Zeus’ hand was still attached firmly on Hiro’s wrist as they darted through the darkened Gedonelune streets, the street lamps lightly lighting their way as the sunset starts to fade on the horizon, pink and orange clouds dancing above them as they ran.
“No way! If we slow down now, we’ll miss it!”
“There’s going to be more than one firework, you moron! Jeez, where are we even going, anyways!?”
Zeus didn’t slow down, though. He led him through several alleys, trying to avoid running into other people as much as possible. Street lamps started to brighten, and they were almost a blur as they rushed past all of them. Zeus eventually led them to a point that was almost on the outskirts of the town, a small, cute little park with a large fountain in the middle. Clearly this wasn't a popular spot for watching the fireworks, because there was hardly anybody else there. Having ran what felt like a marathon, the two boys were breathing heavily as they finally got a chance to rest. Zeus flopped right in front of the fountain, spreading his arms and legs out. Hiro bent over, using his knees to support his upper body so he didn't fall over, before realizing that sitting was a very good idea.
"You… are so… fucking lucky… that we… are both in shape…" Hiro could barely speak between deep, hitched breaths. "If you ever… make me run like that… ever again… I will cut off your legs."
"You… would never…" Zeus grinned at Hiro, despite his entire body feeling like it's on fire. "Your dad… would kill you… if I ended up like mine." 
Hiro didn't dare give that a witty comeback. He just decided to hit Zeus square in the stomach with the scabbard to his sword. Zeus let out a big "OOF" before clutching his stomach in pain, and then laughing. Hiro was way too tired to laugh, but he did let a small chuckle escape. Before he knew it, Hiro was doing his usual scans of the area, looking for anything or anyone suspicious. He didn't see anything just yet, but he got the strange feeling like there was someone watching. Not maliciously, but…
[BOOM]
The sudden explosion of the first firework of the night startled Hiro. He looked to the sky, and there it was: a shimmering red firework. Next came dazzling showers of golds, greens, purples, and blues. Shaped like flowers, cats, and even some like stars, each and every firework that went off seemed to dance upon the twilight sky of the city. Somehow, that idiot managed to pick the perfect spot. This was the perfect place to watch them - and the two were far enough away so that way they didn't have to worry about the sound of the fireworks blowing out their eardrums.
"See? We made it just in time!" Zeus peeled himself off the ground and sat next to Hiro on the fountain's edge, brushing his cardigan off as he sat. "The rush was worth it!"
"I'm more amazed at how you found this spot. It's perfect." And very unlike Zeus, Hiro thought. There was no way he thought of this on his own.
"Isn't it? I saw this park in a little brochure not too long ago, then I saw where the fireworks were being lit… then BOOM! Great idea!" Zeus beamed, placing his hands proudly on his hips.
"Mmhm." Hiro does not remember seeing any kind of brochure like that in their room at all. 
Zeus started taking out his camera for the second time (at least, to Hiro's knowledge - god only knows what he was doing in the dressing room), trying to focus on getting the perfect shot of the fireworks in the sky. He took a few unsuccessful ones, which he was saddened by. Hiro just kept his eyes on the sky, but occasionally stole a glance at Zeus whenever he would make disgruntled noises. This was nice. Zeus eventually got the kind of picture he wanted, then turned his attention to taking a selfie with Hiro. 
"What are you doing?" Hiro rested his head on one of his hands.
"Come on, just one picture of us!"
"I think you've already taken enough pictures of me today. I saw you taking some at the café." 
"This is different!!"
"Wha- how?!"
"Because I didn't get one of us! Totally different. Now shut up and smile!" Before Hiro could get another word in, Zeus was already smiling at the camera, making a peace sign with his other hand and snapping a photo. Hiro sighed once he was done.
"You are incorrigible." 
"Ooh, five points for such a big word!"
Hiro glared daggers at his liege, quickly doing a partial draw on his sword and flashing the blade to intimidate Zeus.
"Yeesh. Tough crowd." Zeus put his photos and camera back into their respective cases in his bag, carefully switching it with something else. Hiro didn't see what it was, but Zeus did like fidgeting with random things in his bag.
After a few moments, something started eating at Hiro. It had actually been eating at him all day, but this was the first time he spoke out loud about it.
"Zeus. Why did you really want to go out today?"
"... Whaddya mean, Hiro?"
"Look, Zeus. I've known you for longer than I'd like to admit. You're not exactly yourself today, and I don't know why."
"Pretty sure I'm the same as I've always been."
Hiro straightened his back and sat up properly. "No, you're not." He chided as another gold and blue firework lit up the sky. "You've been acting weird all day."
"Yeah? How so?"
"Well, for starters…" Hiro stood up, crossing his arms as he turned his attention to Zeus. Zeus knew this pose well. Hiro is about to get on his soapbox.
"Not only did you 'just decide' to go out into town today, you deliberately hid the fact that you wanted to watch these fireworks."
Another boom echoes. Zeus is looking at the ground. 
"Next, you have a very weird and secretive conversation with our good friend Jay that leaves you practically speechless." 
Another. This time in reds and silvers.
"You want to go shopping, yet I didn't see you spend a single damn lune! Which I have never seen you do!"
Four booms at once.
"And you were in such a rush to get here, when any other place in the city could have done just as well! Seriously, Zeus, did you think I wouldn't notice?"
Another. Zeus meets Hiro's intense gaze sheepishly. "Hiro, I…"
"You what? Seriously, are you okay?" 
"Yes, I'm fine!" Zeus stands to meet Hiro's height. Hiro was always a little shorter than Zeus. "I just… I need to ask you something, Hiro." This was a look Hiro had not seen on Zeus' face in years. Only in a memory, now.
"I just… I don't know how to ask it right."
"You don't know until you try."
"I know, I know! Hoo. Okay." Zeus slapped his cheeks to recenter himself. He then looked Hiro right in the eyes as he spoke.
"Hiro, what do you think you are to me?"
Hiro was stunned, to say the least. He gave Zeus a thousand yard stare before he could even think of a proper answer.
"I, uh…"
Another boom. Blue and red this time.
"I-I'm your retainer. I'm the one that keeps you safe. What else am I supposed to be?" Hiro couldn't look Zeus in the eyes anymore. He was really blindsided by that question.
"Go on."
Another boom. Blue and red again.
"What do you mean, 'go on'? I don't understand…" Zeus reached a hand out to place on Hiro's shoulder. Hiro brushed it away.
"I… I think you have more to say."
"Zeus, if this is another one of your jokes, it is really not funny. I really don't know where you want me to go with this."
Another. Green and blue.
"I just want you to talk, Hiro."
"Talk about what?! You are my liege. I am your retainer. I keep you safe, you pay me. Actually, you don't even do that." Hiro turned away from Zeus. What does he even tell Zeus anyways? That he has been traumatized by his father's teachings and that is preventing him from truly becoming close with Zeus as they age? That he has feelings for Zeus he can't even describe because he's never asked anyone else about them, nor has he ever felt them towards anyone else? 
Four more booms, all blue and green.
"I am your retainer. How many times do I have to say it, you idiot?! I am your royal shield, nothing more." Why did he feel his eyes welling up? Why is his chest burning again?
"... Is that really how you feel?"
Hiro nodded. Another boom. Blue again.
"I know my place, Zeus. I don't know how you haven't learned yours yet."
"Hiro." Zeus reached out and grabbed Hiro's wrist. No escape this time. 
"W-what?!"
"... Do you know what I think you are to me?" Hiro didn't answer and kept his face hidden from Zeus. Another boom, red flowers.
"You are the most irreplaceable person in my life. You are the one that is always there for me, whether I like it or not." 
"... Because I have to be."
"I don't believe that. If you didn't want to be here, you'd be watching over Lulu and Belle." He was right.
Another boom, red and blue flowers. 
"Hiro, you are more than a retainer to me." Zeus tightened his grip on Hiro's wrist. Hiro could swear that he could hear Zeus' heartbeat. "You are my best friend, my partner in crime, my most trusted confidant."
Zeus walked around Hiro so he could see his face. Zeus was taken aback by the tears welling in Hiro's eyes. Zeus cupped Hiro's cheeks with both of his hands, drawing himself closer to Hiro. Hiro's heart was about to burst.
"I need you to understand how much you mean to me, Hiro. I'm sorry that I'm not great at saying it out loud or expressing it, but I mean it!"
Another boom, purple flowers.
"You are not my royal shield, Hiro. You are my royal treasure. My hero." Zeus' cheeks flushed a bright red as he spoke. Hiro didn't notice it before.
"You… You absolute moro-"
Before Hiro could finish his sentence, Zeus' lips were on his. 
Another, all blue and gold. 
This wasn't practice, this was… real. When Hiro got over the initial shock of what was happening, he was hesitant to kiss back. He was scared, but, against his better judgment, let his guard down for the first time in years and wrapped his arms around Zeus's neck, pulling him in closer. Zeus deepened the kiss when Hiro did this, and Hiro let him. The tears that had been welling in Hiro's eyes finally escaped. The burning in his chest turned to butterflies, almost as if they had finally been freed from a lifetime of captivity. When they finally parted, both of them were out of breath for a moment. Zeus rested his forehead on Hiro’s, still gently holding Hiro’s face in his hands.
“...Are you sure you’re feeling alright? Was that… practice?” Hiro muttered through trembling lips.
“Hiro, I am completely fine. That wasn’t practice.”
“But why all this? Why now?”
“I… don’t want to bring it back into the light.”
Hiro had already had a guess for what Zeus meant. 
“... You can say it. I don’t mind.”
“Are you sure?” Hiro nodded again. “Okay…” Zeus was still blushing, but he looked at Hiro in the eyes once more. Zeus always loved the golden brown color that they were.
“When I was… In that coma, during your prefect trials…” Hiro hit the nail on the head. “I had a dream. I had a dream where you died instead of me. You were covered in so much blood, and I could barely even live with myself.” Hiro remembers staying by Zeus’ side every day and every night he was in that coma. He remembers Zeus stirring in his unconscious state, sometimes they did seem like he was having a nightmare… “I… saw your funeral. I had to console your mom, tell your dad that you died doing your job like he wanted, Kureha didn’t even speak to me. My family was constantly by my side, asking and making sure that I was okay. I had to spend the rest of my life without you. It was hell, and I don’t ever want to live like that ever again, dream or no dream.” 
Another boom, reds, blues, and golds.
“... I think I understand.”
“But do you understand how important you are to me?”
Hiro felt more tears falling down his cheeks. Not like he could do anything to stop them. Hiro swallowed hard before speaking. “It’s… hard for me to. You are such a moron, and I…” 
“Hiro, forget everything you’ve been taught for a minute. What do you want? How do you actually feel?”
Hiro blanked for a moment. Another boom, all gold. He tried clearing his mind, taking the time to think about what he wanted for a change. He thought about all of the years they’ve spent together, all the times Hiro had protected Zeus, all the times they just… had fun together. He reminisced on his own feelings, and he tried so hard to figure out what it was he had been feeling throughout his entire life. The burning in his chest, the static he would get every time they touched, how he was always so calm and how everything they did felt so natural, so right. 
Another boom, gold and red. 
And then it hit him. He finally connected the dots, how did he not realize this sooner? 
He’s been in love with this idiot his entire life. 
Another boom, purples, blues, and golds. 
“I..” Hiro’s voice was almost a whisper as he spoke. He still wasn’t comfortable saying it out loud just yet. “I-I think that… maybe… I just want to stay with you. For a long time.” 
Zeus wiped the warm tears from Hiro’s eyes. “I think you can do better than that.” He grinned.
“Shut up, you idiot! This is difficult enough as it is; I can’t just let go of the mindset that’s been drilled into me since I was born! What else are you expecting me to say?!” Hiro took a small step back from Zeus, moving his hands and placing them on the royal’s shoulders. He averted Zeus’ gaze once again.
Zeus ran a hand through Hiro’s silky raven hair. Another thing he hasn’t done in years.
“I want you to say that you love me, too.”
“...What?”
“I love you, Hiro Tachibana.”
Another boom. Blues, whites, golds, and reds. 
Hiro froze. He didn’t know he needed to hear those words, but they broke him in all the right ways. Hiro felt his knees go weak, and his composure simply lost. He fell to his knees, clutching the bottom of Zeus’ cardigan, his face red and stained with even more tears now.
“Hiro…” Zeus knelt down to meet Hiro once again, getting to an equal height once again. The young royal grasped Hiro’s hands with his own, removing Hiro’s hands from his cardigan and holding them in his hands so, so gently. Zeus had never seen Hiro like this - was he being too forward? Was this too soon? Did he misunderstand everything about their relationship?
“Y-you don’t have to say it back, actually. We can just… take our time. Yeah, at our own pace! So please, don’t cry…”
“Y-you are such… a moron…” Hiro choked out through stifled tears, wiping his face on his arm to try and wipe away the tears that just wouldn’t stop coming. 
“I have… been… in love with you… for years.” Hiro tightened his grip on Zeus’ palms. “Every day of my life, it feels like. I… I can’t bear to think about you not being in my life. I was so beside myself when… when the fierga…” 
“I know.”
“I don’t think you do, Zeus! You are my whole goddamn world! You want me to say it, so I’m saying it!” He lightly punched Zeus with his left hand, nothing unusual for him. “I’m so fucking in love with you it hurts! It hurts me because I didn’t think we would ever go past what we always have been! I thought…”
Zeus didn’t say anything. For the first time in a while, that is. He simply listened.
“I thought that you would never love me back. I always assumed that you’d fall in love and get married to some girl, or your parents would marry you off to some noble, and I… I would just get tossed to the sidelines like I always have. Like the rest of my family always has.”
Hiro punched him again, a little harder this time. Another boom, purple and gold once again. 
“I love you so much, Zeus. So, so fucking much.” If you told him 10 years ago, when they were just kids sparring under the midday sun, that he would be in love with his best friend, Hiro wouldn’t believe you. Zeus used his newly freed hand to wipe Hiro’s tears once more, tenderly grazing his thumb against Hiro’s cheeks. He then grabbed the back of Hiro’s head and brought their foreheads together once more. Hiro had never seen Zeus so gentle. He was always so boisterous, loud, and so full of life that it sometimes annoyed him. Hiro always expected Zeus to just make a big, vibrant showing out of his love- he never expected such a muted confession. 
“I love you too, Hiro. More than anyone.”
“... Can you kiss me again?” Hiro asked sheepishly. 
“Of course.” 
This kiss was so much more gentle, so much more loving, so much softer than any other. Hiro once again pulled Zeus in closer, one hand around the back of Zeus’ neck, mirroring the one Zeus had on his own. This second kiss felt like it was too short, so they went in for another one. Another. Even more. A kiss for every year they missed being like this, as though they were making up for time lost. Zeus wrapped his free hand around Hiro’s waist, supporting his weight as they leaned deeper into every kiss. This was a dream, or it felt like it, at least. 
By this point in time, the sky had turned completely dark, but the streetlights and fireworks were still gently illuminating them as they embraced. This almost felt like a dream, much like the one Hiro had earlier. How was it a memory and a prophetic dream all at once? He will never know. Time seemed to stop for them in this wholesome, private moment of their own. Everything was falling into place, and this was only the first step towards the rest of their future. More fireworks boomed in every color of the rainbow behind them. Hiro’s tears finally subsided.
When they needed to catch their breath, they just stayed in place, not saying anything - basking in their newfound intimacy. Zeus pulled away first, reaching back into his bag and pulled out a small, velvet box. Hiro looked confused at first. He’s seen the box before, but he always thought it was just a case for Zeus to put his rings when he was washing his hands. Instead, Zeus hands the box out for Hiro to take. 
“I, um, also got this for you, too.”
“Uh…”
“Just take it!”
Hiro did. “Am I allowed to open it?”
“Wouldn’t be much of a gift if you didn’t, now would it?”
“Heh.” Hiro fidgeted with the box for a moment, tracing his fingertips on the velvet before properly opening it. 
Inside was a gorgeous, thick banded silver ring with a light blue sapphire stone the exact color of Zeus’ hair inlaid in the center. On the sides of the ring were their constellations - Scorpius on one side, Capricornus on the other - and raised filigree of the same lilies that always adorned the Brundle estate’s table centerpieces. Hiro took the ring out of the box, in awe of the attention to detail put into it. He then saw the etched wording on the inside of the ring.
“For my hero.”
“... This is moving a little too fast, Zeus.” He was such a cheeseball, Hiro thought. He almost started to cry again.
Zeus’ eyes widened, and then he started to panic. “N-no, wait!! This is NOT what you think it is!!”
“What the hell else am I supposed to think when you give me such a nice ring, idiot?!”
“Just, argh! Look!” Zeus pulled out another, similar ring from his bag and held it out for Hiro to see. This one, while similar in size, was golden and had a beautiful black opal inlaid. It also had the same constellations, but had cherry blossom filigree instead. 
"I'm not proposing, okay?! I mean, I would still like to, you know, one day, but not right now! They're just, um…"
"... More like promise rings?"
"Y-yeah!" Zeus scratched the back of his head, almost reflexively. Hiro smiled and put the ring on his right ring finger. 
"This is still all… very sudden. But thank you, Zeus."
"It's… no problem." Zeus smiled back. He loved Hiro's smile, fangs and all. The only thing Zeus ever wanted to do was to see it. Zeus placed his own ring in the same spot.
Hiro shifted his body and scooted closer to the young royal, resting his head on Zeus' shoulder. Zeus put his arm around Hiro immediately, allowing Hiro to take in even more of Zeus' insane amount of body heat. They sat and watched the fireworks for a small while, silent once again. Simply enjoying the moment and all that it entailed, the fountain bubbling softly beside them. 
"... How did you know?"
"How did I know what?"
"How did you know I would reciprocate? And why me, for that matter?"
Zeus sighed. "I pour my heart out, confess my love, and you still need more?" Zeus brushed some of Hiro's bangs out of his face. 
"You are going to have to get used to it. I'm not even close to being done with interrogating you."
"Well, for starters, you're not exactly subtle."
"The hell does that mean?"
"Hiro, do you remember when we went to our first homecoming dance? When we were still teenagers?"
Hiro froze. Was he fucking psychic? "... Remind me."
"Heh, gladly. When we got home, I was sooo damn insecure. I was like, 'ohh my god, I'm a virgin, what if those hot upperclassmen try to seduce me and figure out I haven't even kissed anyone!'"
Hiro chuckled at Zeus' retelling. "Yeah?"
"Yeah! And do you remember what your reaction was?"
"Blocked it from my memory."
"You said, and I quote: 'You could always practice on me, you know'. I nearly fainted!" Zeus always had a spot-on impression of Hiro. 
"Hm. What else?"
"What else? We then made out for like, the next two hours! You even made fun of me for kissing you horribly."
"You could use some work." 
"Like THAT! That is the exact same damn thing you told me that night, too!"
"Sounds like you haven't gotten much better these past 8 years, then!" Hiro laughed at his own joke.
"Oh, shut it! It's not my fault that my coach was incredible and then decided to never teach me again."
"You are so not blaming me for that."
"I think I can!"
"Uh, no. You were the one who decided to act like it never happened ever again."
"... We just got busy, that's all. We didn't get much time to be alone after that."
"Zeus, we've been roommates for the past four years. We have had plenty of time."
"It's totally different! What was I supposed to do, just walk up to you and say 'Hey Hiro! Not sure if you remember the happiest day of my life, but can we practice kissing again? No homo, full bi!' Absolutely not."
Hiro snorted at the "no homo", trying to contain his laughter.
"Besides, you seem like you've been really annoyed with me these past few years. I was hardly even sure that this," Zeus waves his hands around, gesturing to the both of them, " was even going to work. I have been nervous about this for weeks! I didn’t expect you to be such a crybaby about it, though."
“Who the hell are you calling a crybaby?!” Hiro couldn't deny it, maybe he has been just a little too mean to Zeus. Not like he's going to stop any time soon, but maybe he'll make it clearer that it's just banter. 
“Regardless, why me, though? You still haven’t answered that.”
“Coulda sworn I did. But, sheesh, you sure know how to make me talk.” 
“It’s my specialty.”
“Uh huh. Suuuure.” Zeus adjusted his grip on Hiro’s arm, then used his free hand to hold one of Hiro’s, intertwining their fingers like they did so many years ago. “If I’m being honest… It’s always been you, Hiro.”
“What do you mean?”
“Hiro, we’ve pretty much always been together. I’ve always loved you, I think. I’ve done a lot of thinking about my ideal partner, and who I wanted to marry. Hell, I thought about the kind of person you would like best, because I knew you’d still always be by my side.”
Zeus raised his free hand and placed a kiss onto the back of Hiro’s. What a dork.
“Eventually, it just all came back to you. Every road, every thought, just back to you, every time. Plus, I wanted to keep my word.”
“...Your word?”
“Well, yeah. I told my mom I wanted to marry you when we were kids, right? I actually had a conversation with her when we went home last, and she was still holdin’ on to that. She kept asking me when I was going to propose, the nerve!”
“Oh, my god.” Hiro covered his mouth with his free hand, trying really hard not to burst out laughing. Lady Brundle is hilarious. 
“Hell, even Kureha butted in on the conversation and asked me when I was going to ask for ‘permission to wed her precious baby bro’! I nearly lost my mind, I tell you!” 
“Wait a minute, even Kureha knows?!”
“Are you kidding me? She was like, the first person to see that we were so stupidly in love with each other, even before we knew it! And boy does she not let me forget it.” 
Everything started making sense, now. Kureha’s torture of Zeus was her being a protective older sister. The witch was testing him all along, making sure that Zeus knew exactly what he was getting into. 
“Oh. Oh, it’s all coming together now. That sneaky little…”
“Right?! She’s going to be so happy when we go back and see them next time, I bet.”
“I don’t think my dad will be, though…”
“Won’t know until we go back and tell ‘em. I think my dad will convince him that it’s not a bad thing, though.” 
“Ugh, yeah, your dad is quite convincing. I still don’t know how my dad keeps falling for his bullshit.”
“You can’t survive being head of a prominent noble house without having a silver tongue, I guess.”
Hiro squeezed Zeus’ hand, smiling softly as more fireworks danced in the sky. This was nice, Hiro thought. 
“You know, I’m still not convinced you thought of all this by yourself.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?! Am I not allowed to be romantic?”
“You don’t have a single romantic bone in your body, moron. Who was it that helped you with all this?”
Zeus muttered under his breath, turning his head away in a huff. 
“Zeus.”
“...ay.”
“What was that? I can’t hear you.”
“It was JAY, okay! Are you happy now?!”
Even more dots started connecting. Hiro practically jumped away from Zeus, his normally tired eyes wide with surprise. 
“OUR Jay?!”
“Yes, OUR Jay! She told me about the fireworks, the park, hell, she even coached me on what to say to you, and how to respond. She was a fucking demon about it!”
“I cannot believe her. Is that what you were actually talking about earlier? I knew you were lying to me about what you were talking about, but I didn’t even begin to imagine it would be THIS.”
“Ugh, you really are too sharp for your own good. Yes! She was reminding me to ‘shut the fuck up for once’. We went over the plan, and she reminded me about everything she taught me. Quite harshly, might I add!”
“Sounds like Jay, alright. How long has she known?”
“For about three weeks. That’s when I got the rings made.”
“Oh, so those were your idea. Didn’t think you had it in you.”
Zeus scoffed. “‘Course they were! I was actually planning on giving it to you for your birthday, but then Jay told me about the fireworks, and I just, kinda… let it slip to her. She was crying even harder than you were when I told her! Going on and on about how she’s ‘so happy I finally realized it’ and that ‘she’s been trying to wingman us the entire time she’s known us’, and a whole bunch of other shit.”
“Bet you twenty lunes that she’s going to start crying again when we tell her your plan was a success.” 
“Oh come on, that’s not even a fair bet! You know for a fact she will.”
The two of them laughed again, thinking of how silly everything had been. The two enjoyed the rest of the beautiful fireworks together, and began to start walking back to the academy once it ended, hand in hand the entire time. When they left, Hiro could swear that he saw a faint flash of white hair in the distance behind where they had been the whole time. He decided to ignore it, for better or for worse.
They talked extensively on the way back to their dorms, thinking about how each and every one of their friends would react to the news. They came to the conclusion that they weren’t going to tell everybody just yet, only a select few. Lucious was definitely going to be the first to know, although they knew he was going to make fun of them endlessly for it. The path back to the academy was peaceful, with only a few other students making their way back to the academy as well. It was too dark for anybody to see them at this point, so they simply ignored them. They knew they still had prefect privileges, so it isn’t an issue for them to still be out so late, but they still snuck their way across the dimly lit grounds. When they finally reached their dorm, they both shared a bed for the first time in years, and also the first time so intertwined. No matter where they went, they would still be able to give themselves private, intimate moments. Perfect moments that would be in their memories for a lifetime. 
This was their new beginning. Starting over in this way wouldn’t be easy, but loving each other is the easiest thing they’ve ever done.
☆☆☆
Twenty eight years together, and things are about to change for the better.
News of the young royal’s wedding was heard across the continent. People all over came to see the wedding, with many people wondering who the heir to the Brundle estate was to marry. 
Many close friends of the grooms’ were in the wedding party, of course. Lucious was Hiro’s best man, and Jay was to be Zeus’ best woman. Caesar, Alfonse, Liz, and even Klaus were a part of the party as well. Kureha was of course by Hiro’s side as well, and Lulu and Belle were dual flower girls. Jay cried the whole ceremony, and so did the boys’ mothers, of course. Especially when Hiro’s father started walking Hiro down the aisle. All of their other classmates and family members were in the front rows, who were hooting and hollering every chance they got. 
Their wedding outfits were nothing less than extravagant, of course. Zeus’ was in a dark navy suit, adorned with cream colored cuffs and lapels. The same lily filigree on the ring he would be wearing for the rest of his life inlaid with delicate gold embroidery. He also had a large, fur lined cape that draped across the floor, the fur white as sparkling snow and the fabric a deep black on top and red on the inside, the crest of Queensblade adorned on the back. Hiro was dressed in traditional Hinomotan wedding attire, a black silk montsuki and gray hakama with silver cherry blossoms embroidered at the hems. His haori was also black with the same cherry blossom embroidery as the hakama, and the Tachibana family crest adorned the back of it. Hiro’s father had helped him get dressed, of course. Small words were whispered to Hiro by his father before letting him go, telling him how proud he was. Words not often spoken, but appreciated nonetheless. 
Their vows were soft, heartfelt, full of emotion. Many spectators were surprised at how the young royal was marrying his retainer, which was simply unheard of until today. Many of the noble women and their daughters wept over the fact that they now knew they had no chance at marrying into the Brundle royal family, as the two men’s vows made it clear just how much in love they were. So many photographs were taken, and Luca was specially commissioned to do a painting of their ceremony, which still hangs above the mantle of the Brundle family estate. 
The reception was an absolute rager. Hiro and Zeus of course out-ate everybody, easily eating three plates a piece, not including the cake (of which they ate one of the tiers all by themselves). There was plenty of dancing, singing, and genuine merriment for all who came. Hiro and Zeus had the time of their lives, surrounded by the people they love most. 
“I still can’t believe this is finally happening.”  Lord Brundle gazed softly from the sidelines as his son danced. 
“Finally? What do you mean, my lord?” Drink in hand, Hiro’s father settled next to his liege. 
“Oh come now, old friend! Don’t tell me you haven’t seen this coming since they were children!”
“And you’re telling me you have?” 
“Of course! Why do you think I always let them sneak off during my speeches?”
The look on Sir Tachibana’s face was one for the history books. Lord Brundle immediately burst into a hearty laughter. “Oh, oh dear! Don’t tell me you never noticed!?”
Sir Tachibana’s face turned bright red. He turned his face away from Lord Brundle in embarrassment. “My focus has always been on you. I never falter from my duty.”
“Well, you certainly faltered in your duty as a father.” That comment got a searing glare from his retainer. “Oh, you know I jest. You’ve raised splendid children.”
“I should hope so. I’m proud of him.”
“Hm, that’s not the impression I got.”
“No, I am. It’s… not the outcome I expected, but he followed his heart. I think, in some way, he even taught this old dog a new trick.”
“Oh? And what is that, exactly?”
Sir Tachibana stared at his son, softening his expression. A small smile crept upon his lips.
“When he was young, I think I was too harsh on him. I always told him to stay firm in his resolve. I told him that keeping his distance was best, as I had done with you. He ignored every single word I told him…”
“And that’s a good thing?”
“I didn’t think so at first, no. In fact, I was furious.”
“As you always are.” Another glare as Sir Tachibana takes a sip of his drink. Lord Brundle gave a smug grin in return.
“Anyways. I was upset at first. I nearly lost my temper, in fact. But Hiro was so honest and true to himself… Once I saw that, I realized that I was wrong.”
“Oh?”
“Hiro taught me that the best way to protect someone is to love them, not distance yourself from them.”
“Aw, warmed your cold heart, did he?”
“Must you continue to chide me, my lord?”
“Oh, you know I only tease. I’m simply glad that you’ve come around to it.”
“Of course. I was going to one way or another.”
“I knew you were. It’s a shame you realized it now. If you had realized it sooner, then maybe things would have been different between us.”
“Wha- Milord!” Sir Tachibana’s face flushed a bright red. 
“ Ha ha! Another jest, dear friend!” Lord Brundle slapped a hand on his retainer’s back. 
“... You are truly incorrigible, my lord.” he grumbled. 
“Only for you. I’m just looking forward to seeing where they’ll go from here.”
“How so?”
“Zeus is about to take over the family, you know. He’s always lived his life to the fullest, so I’m wondering how he will fare as a Lord. He may be as charismatic as I am, but he’s never been… The smartest, if you will.”
“You don’t need to tell me twice. Well, Hiro will be with him, so I’m sure he’ll be fine.”
“... I’m sure he will.”
☆☆☆
150 years together, and they are both long gone.
A young man with stark white hair travels the world, finding himself in Queensblade for the first time in a very long time. As he tours the vibrant streets, he finds himself entranced by the markets and dazzling flowers that lined every corner. He asks for directions to the Brundle estate, and gets a very quick answer. He buys a fresh bouquet of lilies and cherry blossoms, a now common pairing in Queensblade, on the way as a gift. 
When he arrives at the gates of the Brundle estate, things are not like he remembers when he went to the wedding so many years ago. Not like that wasn’t to be expected, of course - it has been well over 100 years since then. A gentle breeze tosses his long, braided hair as he approaches the northern garden - a newly added garden compared to the other three. The gates to the Brundle estate are always open - at least, the one leading to the northern garden is. The paths leading to the actual estate are closed to the public for safety reasons, courtesy of the Tachibana family. 
The garden is as gorgeous as the rest, and seems to be more of a mix of the western and eastern gardens. Gorgeous marble paths, roses, and cherry blossom trees adorned every corner, and many stone gazebos and benches allow for many people to rest as they stroll through the garden. A large pond with many artificial waterfalls spreads throughout the garden as well, with many Hinomotan and Queensblade styled bridges going over them. Massive butterfly koi float all throughout, and there are a few stands that are filled with koi food so they can be fed. As a result, they are very friendly. The white haired man leans down over one of the bridges, putting one of his hands in the water. The koi swarm him, and he chuckles at the sensation of their toothless bites. He makes his way towards the center of the garden, where a large, bronze statue resides of his old classmates. Others have already come and gone with their offerings, leaving very similar flowers to the ones he had already bought. As he approaches the center statue, he is stopped by a young woman with raven hair and golden eyes.
“Oh, are you also here to pay respects?”
“Yes, I am. Are you of the Tachibana family?”
“Good guess! Indeed I am. How do you know of my ancestor? Or are you just another history buff?”
“Oh, no, nothing of the sort. My… great grandfather was a classmate of theirs. They were kind to him, and he attended their wedding.”
“Oh, my! You have quite the connection, then.”
“They weren’t close by any means, so I’m sure I’m not as lucky as people like the Goldsteins or the Baroques.”
“Regardless, I think it’s wonderful that your ancestor got to spend time with them. Lord Zeus and Lord Hiro were some of the most influential people in the history of the Brundle and Tachibana families. I’ve heard many stories of Lord Hiro’s devotion growing up.”
“Well that is wonderful to hear. I’m glad to hear that my ancestor was able to be a part of the lives of such influential people.” The young man places the bouquet at the foot of the statue, and clasps his hand in prayer. There are two plaques that adorn the base of the statue. 
“I’m glad it is. Oh, well, I should be going now! Thank you for sharing your story with me. Please don’t hesitate to come by again!”
“Of course. I would love to stop by again.” 
“Oh, what is your name? I would love to put you on the list of special guests for the yearly public gala.”
“... Leon.”
“That’s a nice name. I’ll make sure you get on the list. Thank you, Leon! I hope to see you there!” The young woman ran off towards the main estate, waving goodbye as she did. Leon waves back, a small smile on his face. He’ll have to remember the gala, as now he has something new to look forward to.
He focuses on the plaques, finally able to read them. A soft smile appears on his face as he reads, thinking of all the shenanigans his former classmates got into while they spent their days at the Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy. 
“IN REMEMBRANCE OF 
ZEUS BRUNDLE
and
HIRO TACHIBANA”
“Here, on this day, we dedicate this statue to Lord Zeus Brundle and Lord Hiro Tachibana. Innovators for their time, Zeus is remembered for his exceptional leadership of the House of Brundle, leading it to a new age of prosperity unlike any had seen before. He is also remembered for being a pioneer of summoning magic, as his formulas are still being taught in schools to this day. Despite his grandeur, he never hesitated to call himself the ‘pinnacle of all things, alive or dead’. 
His husband, Lord Hiro Tachibana is remembered for his unyielding devotion to his husband, even before the two were married. He was Lord Brundle’s stalwart protector first, and his most trusted partner second. Lord Tachibana is also remembered for being an instrumental figure in opening up the doors of trade with Hinomoto, his ancestors’ home country, and leading both our beloved Queensblade and Hinomoto to having a wonderful relationship and economy. He is also known for being one of the best swordsmen in the history of Queensblade.
It is said that the two were hardly seen apart, and their love was stronger than any diamond. With Lord Brundle’s charisma, and Lord Tachibana’s wisdom, the two lead the country into a great era. 
Even in their old age, their love persisted. Surrounded by many friends and family, they both passed away within one minute of each other, conceding as though one could not live without the other.
Here, they stand to remind us not only of the great times our country has had, but also as a symbol of true love.
–Donated by the Goldstein, Baroque, and Abbey Families of Gedonelune–”
Leon clasps his hands together and says a small prayer for his old classmates before he puts his hands in his pockets. He glimpses up at the statue once more, fondly. As he leaves, he hears the sound of two children behind him. He twists around and sees two young boys, no older than 5. One with bright, crystal blue hair, the other with the same raven hair as the woman he met before. 
“Come on, we’re going to be late!”
“Ah– wait, please! I can’t run that fast!!”
Leon smiles once again, and turns around to continue his journeys.
Those kids will be just fine.
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melodyofthevoid · 2 years
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Writing Wrap Up 2022
So... this year I want to take a bit of a different approach. The last 2 years I’ve wrapped up my writing by posting one from each month and thanking y’all for reading, which I thought about but then... it hit me. 
I haven’t really posted anywhere near half of what I’ve written this year. 
It’s a little insane to me, I’ve posted a shit ton these last 2 years, racked up an impressive word count for sure, but this year was. Different. For a few reasons. 
So this is just going to be me contemplating and examining how my writing has changed this year, if you’ll indulge me. 
Talking with a friend, the year itself stuck out to me. 2022. 3 years since I started writing at all. To keep the story brief, I wrote my first work on winter break back in 2019 at the behest of my bestie @/freshfruitforrottingvegetables (I’ve @’d them enough times crediting them for this) and posted it on ao3. I’ve pretty much been writing non-stop since. Invader Zim got me into writing, and the community I found there boosted me and gave me an absolutely incredible support system. 
But, other than the occasional reblog, this isn’t really a Zim blog anymore. I certainly don’t write about it as much, if ever. Now there’s a few reasons for that, not the least of which being almost 3 years is the longest I’ve had a fixation in a while. I’m amazed it held on as long as it did. Second was... I finished the royalty au. It’s almost hard to remember the beginning of this year but back in March, I posted the last chapter of “Isn’t it A Trial”, wrapping up the project I’d spent nearly two years trying to complete. My first big project. 
And it was done. 
There were a few other behind the scenes things that led to distancing from IZ from a writing standpoint but those aren’t really the point of this. 
For the first time since starting this journey, I was... on my own, so to speak. It was weird, scary at times even. Hell, I’m still very much adjusting to doing entirely OC work. The circle of people I’m posting to isn’t a huge thriving fandom, it’s just my mutuals, and those who’ve come to love the Ocean Idiots crew. I throw in some of my (and @/shmunter’s) ocs in as well, but that’s what I’ve been writing from y’all’s perspective. 
As I said, that’s not even a fraction of the stuff I’ve written in my own time that I don't post. Before, I was writing for an audience on some level. They were always stories I wanted to tell, but there was also the excitement of putting them in a pool of collaboration and community. That there were others. Now, these are my stories almost (really key word of almost, I’m not claiming sole ownership of anything) entirely. 
So I’ve had to adjust. I’m still adjusting. I’ve had a lot of days where writing had been a real uphill battle for me and I questioned the quality of my work. What does it mean now that I’m writing for a more narrow group? Is there a point to it? Am I less inspired now? How can I tell I’m growing or not? Can I tackle the scope of project I want to tackle next? Each time I think about it, it gets more and more daunting, overwhelming even. 
That one post about “Aww did you scare yourself out of doing a project” plays often in my mind. Very often. 
It’s going to be a weird year, even few years going forward. Graduation is on the horizon, with the prospect of maybe moving out and making it on my own from here on. I might move away, I might stay home. There’s a lot of unknowns and within that is what I’m going to do with my writing as well. It’s a part of me now without question, but what form will it take? Will I take? 
Much to consider.
So for this moment, I’m choosing to focus on celebrating the changes that have happened, the work I’ve done this year. The ways I’ve improved, the small leaps into different original ideas that I’ve had. I’ve had a ton of fun with making aus for just myself and like- one other person. I had a blast writing for my old DND characters too! There’s a lot to be proud of, and that’s what matters. 
I want to see what I can do, and I think sticking to some short stories while I shore up and figure out what to do with my bigger concepts might be where I go. Maybe not. Who knows. But at the end of the day, we’ll find out when we get there. Thank you, all of you, for your support, your comments, and your encouragement this year. It’s been a good one, for all its ups and downs. 
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innytoes · 2 years
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Greetings if you are still taking sleepy prompts, can you do 2 and possibly 10 for Boggie? I will love you forever.
Being a year older than the rest of the band had its perks. For one, he was the first one with a license and a car, so he could hold that over their heads. Oh, you want to go to McDonalds after the gig? Too bad, I'm driving, Burger King is better anyway. (He didn't really care, he just liked to hear Luke splutter.)
For another, it means he was in college already while the rest were still at home. And college meant his own dorm room. Which despite being on the second floor rather frequently had people climbing through his window. Except Alex, who was normal and either slipped into the building and politely knocked, or threw pebbles at his window until he came downstairs and opened the door for him. Yes, even when his window was already open.
Really, he wasn't sure what he preferred.
Today, it was Reggie who had climbed through his window. Unsurprising, since Luke was back at his parents and trying not to upset his mom by disappearing again, and Alex had his new mysterious boyfriend to flee too when his parents were too much.
Reggie had a standing invitation to come to Bobby's room, especially when he needed somewhere quiet to study. Which, considering he lived in a building full of idiot college students was saying something about how loud Reggie's parents were.
From the dark smudges under his eyes, Bobby could tell this was a bad one. Reggie looked like he hadn't slept properly all week.
Go he gave his boyfriend a hug, and a granola bar, and a kiss to the forehead, and left him alone to grab something to eat at the mess and sneak some shirt back to his room for Reggie. He forced Reggie to eat something, and then let him back at it, settling down on his bed to do some reading for his own courses.
Except at midnight, Reggie was still studying. When Bobby gently suggested he take a break, he whined.
"I'm so behind," he said. "I need to catch up, please, just one more hour."
"Okay," Bobby said. "One more."
Except at one, Reggie tried the same thing.
"Babe, no, you need sleep." He knew from his own late night study sessions that anything past midnight probably wasn't going to stick anyway.
"Thirty more minutes," Reggie begged. "Please? I'll be really quiet, you can just go to bed and I'll leave when I'm done."
"Reg, you're exhausted," Bobby tried to reason with him. "Studying now isn't going to help."
"Please?" Reggie begged. "I just... I don't want to go home."
There it was. Bobby had suspected that Reggie wasn't suddenly just really diligent about the French Civil War.
"You don't have to go home," he promised. "But you do have to close the books and come take a nap, okay?" He was pretty sure as soon as he got Reggie horizontal, he'd be out like a light.
"That's allowed?" Reggie asked, hopeful.
"Of course it's allowed," Bobby said, turning the desk chair so Reggie was facing him. Reggie immediately planted his face against Bobby's stomach. "Why wouldn't it be? Alex crashed here all the time before his mysterious boyfriend who takes him on weird nighttime adventures."
"His name is Willie and they go scream in museums," Reggie mumbled. He sounded like he was already half asleep. "I thought I was just allowed to come over to study and stuff."
"Yeah, and stuff," Bobby said. "You know you're always welcome, Reg. Just because I moved from Lola's place into a dorm room doesn't mean you're not allowed over." It wasn't like he was that serious about his studies anyway. He was mostly just killing time until the guys graduated and Sunset Curve made it big. Whichever came first. Besides, it made his parents happy, and gave him access to a rather sizable allowance, which he'd been quietly saving up so they could all rent an apartment together next year.
"Oh," Reggie said, like that was a revelation. "Wait, you mean we could have been making out this whole time and I just kept coming over to study?"
God, his boyfriend was such a himbo sometimes. "Yes," he said, leaning down to press a kiss to his pouting lips. "But right now, you are going to lie down on my bed, and sleep a solid... at least six hours. I'll drive you to school tomorrow, okay?"
Reggie considered it. "Okay," he said. "And then tomorrow, I can come back and we can make out?"
Bobby laughed. "Yes. Now come on, let's get you to bed."
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Text
ten books
Thanks @spindrifters for the tag!
(In no particular order)
1. The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger (no surprise given my handle, but this is maybe my favorite book ever. I reread it last year to confirm, and yes it still is the best, and I made the mistake of reading the ending while away for the weekend at a friend’s wedding and I cried my fucking eyes out and then I did just a little bit of psilocybin and sang country songs with my friends and had a long talk with my other friend about our creative aspirations and then I was seriously ill for about a week after that, which may or may not have had anything to do with the choices I’d made the previous evening. Anyway, it’s just a great love story. I’m a simple girl.)
2. Beautiful World, Where Are You By Sally Rooney (Everyone has the Sally Rooney book that feels like she read their fucking diary and this one is mine. No, I won’t tell you which parts. But I will tell you that I think the Wedding Chapter in this book is maybe the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read. I’m not exaggerating. I slept with this book next to my bed for weeks and finally to break my attachment to it and read something else, I gave it to my friend who hates Sally Rooney to read on her way to London. She did hate it- couldn’t even get past the phone sex scene, which honestly if you don’t think that’s one of the most romantic things you’ve ever read, I really don’t know how to help you. How could you not love this book??! It’s half emails!)
3. The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater (I know this is a series but idc, if I could only pick one it’d be The Dream Thieves but all these books are the Books of My Heart. I reread them pretty much every year. Look, sometimes you’re in college and for the first time in your life you have Guy Friends, and you are a little bit in love with all of them, even though you are all young fucking idiots, and it feels like a revelation for some reason. Anyone? No? Just me? Well, Maggie Stiefvater wrote a book series about that experience so now I don’t have to.)
4. Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller (This book feels like falling in love. All my favorite books feel like falling in love.)
5. Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir (This is really a catch all for the whole series but I’m a Harrowhark bitch through and through, also this book literally rewired my brain such that I could only write in second person for like two months. I think Tamsyn Muir is a mad genius.)
6. Light from Uncommon Stars by Ryka Aoki (Might be recency bias but I just finished one and really really loved it!)
7. The Host, Stephanie Meyer (I know this is such a weird pick and I could just… not, BUT I unironically love this book. I read it in high school I’ve reread it several times since, it’s kind of a comfort book? Idk how to explain it, but cringe is dead so here we are.)
8. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green (look, you either love JG or you don’t, but I love his writing so much and this book came out my senior year of high school and I carried it around with me in my backpack for months and whenever I would feel sad I would reread it in the middle of class and Mel and I tried to adapt it into a piece for our HS speech team and I can still recite quotes from it and it still means a lot to me.)
9. Fruits Basket by Natsuki Takaya (okay I know this is a manga series and it’s technically 23 books, but Furuba is my Bible, and any list without it would be wrong. I read it for the first time at 12 and I reread it every couple of years and every time I come away with something new. Also I think the original TokyoPop translation is far superior to the Viz editions and it makes me sad that they’re harder to find these days. The 2019 anime adaptation is beautiful but again, I think the TokyoPop translation is better than the anime subs. This series fucking raised me. That is all.)
10. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (look LOOK, it might be the great American novel, okay? It feels so stupid to have it on this list, like, Sam, people fucking know The Great Gatsby is good, we all had to read it for school. Idk man. I love Fitzgerald, truly the saddest sad sack there ever was. His wife was infinitely cooler than him. But God damn could that man write a sentence.)
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scruffyssketchbook · 1 year
Note
Stupid Short Eevee Comic AU: Ice heart and Golden heart chapter 2: "chaotic past"
ATTENTION: this story is about a tragedy that separated a friendship that existed since they were children, it contains content of, domestic abuse, suicide, laboratory traumas, etc, but it also has love, affection, forgiveness, united family, cuteness, etc.
_Prologue: paths, 2 of 3
Episode 1: "Twisted Memories"
11 years ago...
...
???: You are going?
???: ... Yes forgive me *redacted* I need to do this...
???: *sniff*
???:*Sniff* Please...
???: *Sniff* Don't go...
???:*Sniff* If you leave it won't make sense, I want to be with you, *redacted*...
???: You and *redacted* are the only ones who don't treat me mean, everyone always sees me as an "idiot" and never gives a shit about me *Sniff*, I know you gotta go but... *Sniff* I don't want them to go... *sniff*
???: ... Sorry to give you so much trouble...
???: ... I understand how hard this is for you...
???: ... And I feel so bad for leaving my *redacted* little one here...
???: But... I need to do this... For you, for *redacted*, and for your *redacted*, and for everyone...
???: Hey, I have an idea
???: *sniff* umm??
???: When I find a house for the three of us to live in, shall we stay there together? Your *redacted*, you and I my *redacted*, we can run away from all this here and live together forever and we'll be happy forever my *redacted*.
???: *wiping away tear* sounds like a good idea, pinky promise?
???: Pinky promise...
Both: *laughs*
Current days...
...
Blizz: ...what happened? What am I doing here? And what are these memories I'm having?
Blizz: ...am I getting my memories back?
You look at the blue and white scarf you took and you remember many memories...
When you learned from someone you cared about how to walk on two legs, not four.
Blizz: ....
Blizz: ... I saw the expression of regret that he wanted to do something to help me but something was forcing him to stay still...
Even if "he" didn't do anything, you still forgive him.
Blizz: ...I know... You were afraid of "them", weren't you? Don't worry...
Blizz starts to remember some people he's friends with but before that...
Computer noise alongside blizz
Blizz: ...?
You look in the direction of the sound because you remember not turning anything on there, that's weird...
Blizz: ... What is this?
You walk towards what appears to be a half-box computer...
You are very close to this "half-box computer"...
Blizz: ...
Blizz: ...?
You see on the screen the name of this "half-box computer", it's "weather machine"...
Blizz: ... Wait a minute... I remember this machine... I was in charge of using it when necessary...
Blizz: ...but for what?
Blizz: *blizz tries to mess with the weather machine and see a news window in it*
Blizz: ...?
Blizz reads the news and is shocked and gets some answers and some more mysteries
Blizz: ...what? "Blizz is found brutally beaten in Box 2"? But what does it mean?
You get a lot of questions in your head, what do you mean you were found brutally beaten there? Who made this? Why did it? And why would it be precisely in box 2? There are so many questions...
Blizz: ...
Blizz: I think...
Blizz: ...I must look for answers...
Blizz takes the white scarf and puts it around his neck, and ties a knot for it to stay around his neck, and he looks in the mirror, he doesn't know what he feels... Maybe sadness? Maybe anger? Or maybe happy? I don't know.
Blizz: sometimes... I miss when we were little... me and those assholes just needed to live and don't care about time and pain... Like these days...
Blizz after saying that, he takes a deep breath and looks at himself in the mirror one last time... Until someone gently opens the door.
Blizz: ...?
???: blizz?
You look at the figure that gently opened the door, the figure is a female flareon she has big soft fur, she has a scarf with a little green bow around her neck, she has green eyes, and she looks at you worried and happy to see you well, you recognize her, it was the girl who never left you, who showed you when I saw you and wondered why you weren't good enough, she replied with "because nobody is, blue sky.", and you have a great affection for her, she always helped you, stayed by your side even when you cried or got angry, she teased you in a good way, you were almost like soulmates, you are happy and fall one tear from your eye at the sight of her.
Blizz: ...Mary?
Mary: Good to see you doing well, blizz.
Author chan: 👀👀👀 *eats popcorn*
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Text
Thoughts based off of last reblog since I didn't wanna derail just talking about my experiences with no real PointTM
I had the best homeschooling options I think you can really get.
My mom wanted to grow up and be a stay at home mom, but grandma made sure she had a degree and could work if she needed to. My mom went to college FOR teaching and then had me right away so that degree was put away until dad got laid off sixteen years later
I went to preschool and kindergarten and even before my mom knew homeschooling was a real option she was helping with my education.
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Thanks to this book I was WAY ahead of my peers in kindergarten.... With Reading Only. TERRIBLE social skills, I preferred grabbing from our tiny in class library during free choice time over ever playing with anyone.
From first grade to college, I was homeschooled.
And like, I knew every type of family that post described. We had C**** who was never going to go to college, she took over running her family's coffee shop. We had J****, who I think married his girlfriend when they were 16 and 17 if I remember correctly. Or both 17 but I know they weren't 18
(She had cancer and probably wasn't going to make it to the end of the year, for the record. It was very much circumstantial, but I knew more than one other couple who DID get married at 18)
I can look back at the people who went to the co-op and point out the anger management kid, the extreme autism kids, the Weird food allergy kids, the Severely Christian kids, etc.
I knew a family with nine kids where the girls were Not Allowed to wear pants. All dressed, all the time. High collars, sleeves to the elbows, skirts to the ankles.
My mother was told she was training me and my siblings to be sluts for letting us wear two pieces. The kind of two piece that covers the entire stomach and looks functionally like a one piece.
Half the kids I knew weren't allowed to read Harry Potter.
There is a third type the post doesn't mention though. The families who hate the government and are SUPER neglectful. That was my best friend's family growing up.
It's interesting like. Being Homeschooled definitely made me the person I am today. If I could go back I would have stayed in public school and hopefully would have learned to 1 Realize Deadlines Are Real. 2 Study. 3 Socialize with people I don't already know.
If I popped out a kid today (horrifying) I would NOT let them into the public school system.
I grew up SO PREJUDICED against public schoolers lmao. "Those poor idiots, getting pushed into overcrowded, underfunded buildings that are designed to make you a Good Factory Worker not to teach you to learn"
Which isn't the full truth but isn't inaccurate either you know? Like there's a layer of that I don't think I'm ever going to be able to get rid of but I'm also not letting any future kids I'm never going to have go to public school b/c of school shootings.
And if I had gone to public school I wouldn't have gotten to do half the things I did! Civil air patrol, violin lessons, drama club, dance lessons, karate, I did EVERYTHING and if I went to public school there just wouldn't have been time in the day!
I didn't know gay people existed until our Friday Forum (big homeschool co-op that met once a month) people said our state had just failed two intelligence tests. They were talking about how the state was legalizing gay marriage and weed.
I just. Idk. It was the best thing that happened to me. It was Absolutely a cult but one I was on the fringe of. You need a parent who's willing to do a LOT of work to make it work. I never got a high school diploma. I have two college degrees.
I hope my old friends are okay. I haven't talked to any of them in at least three years, closer to 6 for most of them.
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kalianos · 3 months
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(I was a little peeved last night while writing all this. Now with well rested little notes!)
Trapped waiting in this parking lot for the last hour and a half.
Giving coworker a ride home due to various reasons.
Wanted to visit family member in medical care.
....waiting. waiting. Waiting. WAITING.
Car has been off for a while to conserve gas. Hot missouri night.
Agitated all day. Mildly enjoying that someone at this other building always conviently calls out whenever I am on the schedule for some reason. (Sure it's just coincidence)
Don't care, this is the creepy older fuck who is exmormon, caused teenage girls on prom night to cry calling them whores for being in nice dresses in a walmart, and holds massive whiny bitch grudges because I don't tell him bye when leaving the work place. (Mildly still mad like the rest of the dish pit this man doesn't do his job ever. He gets in the way of everyone else's job and then does his. Claims staying hours late is okay because he is "helping".)
...also constantly complains about twelve odd medical issues, collapsing lungs, still smokes like a freight train. (He's an idiot)
I'm missing out on a Shrek 2 group watch for boiling my ass in my car waiting. (And mount grinding in shadowbringers.)
"Hey take your time man." (Me being generically generous)
"OH don't say that. You'll be here till 1am."
.....man he better not have been fucking serious.
Oh well. Town just got a whataburger so I guess I know what I am doing later before I have to drive an hour home.
...fucker I have to worker tomorrow too hurry the fuck up
I can only read the pathfinder 2e bestiary so many times waiting. (Just bought it that day. Garbage truck and a charger nearly jammed into me on the way back to work)
Tired, hungry, sweating. Going to take a long shower when I get home. (...I didn't)
Fuck man I try to be a good person but this shit is ridiculous.
"OH man a car that doesn't smell like cigarettes and isn't an uber."
Bitch maybe I should be charging Uber rates! ( He paid me $20 for the trouble)
Fucking fuck I have a god damn life. I was going to stop by and say hi to my parents but that's out the window. (They finally acknowledged I was in a relationship and wanted to give me a card celebrating. Five years later.)
Well since we are for some reason both down here while I write this and you read this.
Oop he showed up.
Oh the part where I was mad because he wanted to go to Walmart at 10:20 pm didn't save. Weird. Didn't get home untill midnight. Hate it there. Need a new job. Sick of babysitting older people who don't care and dealing with nurses who know nothing about diets and allergies. Sick of giving up nights of my life because if this give a mouse a cookie shit when I live an hour away from the final destination of this night.
Bah.
I don't miss my early twenties. I just wish I didn't grow into a sour person in my now early thirties.
I should write out a horny story for old times sake for pride month. Lord knows I'm not getting story commissions.
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gumilac · 3 years
Text
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this person beside you during your library date has been restless— and, it's none other than your boyfriend.
his slender fingers tap on the book before him, seemingly unaware of the contents inside it. he's reading yes, but nothing really stays in his mind, like the words are just dancing before him.
you stop reading to spare a glance at kei, he's bouncing his knee and one hand is rubbing his temple. straightening your back, you turn your whole body to face him, resting your arm on the backrest of the chair. you observe the blond from where you were seated, golden eyes scanning the book but never really moving to the next page. he looks lost in thought— well, because he really is.
you've been dating kei for almost 8 months now (have been friends for almost 2 years and a half) so you knew him like the back of your hand, and for the past few weeks he's been... out of it? he's been uncoordinated, distracted, and preoccupied. you don't know why but maybe he was just nervous for the final exams. however, you've taken it upon yourself to figure this out and clear up whatever thoughts are bothering him— this is kei we're talking about here and, he never really tells you anything that's troubling him.
"kei," you call out softly.
"kei, love," no response.
putting a hand on his bouncing knee, he looks at you quite surprised, like you've snapped him out of his trance. he sits up straight and pushes his glasses back up before looking at you. he hums and gives you a small smile but... it's forced.
"anything wrong?"
he clears his throat and shakes his head, "nothing's wrong shortcake, i'm alright."
raising a brow at him, he knows you're not convinced. so, he caves in and lets out a long sigh— must be something really big, and god knows how long he's been holding it in.
"no pressure, kei" you rub his knee. "i'm all ears, take your time."
"can you come closer?" he asks and you tilt your head.
"why?"
he clicks his tongue and you furrow your brows at him before letting out a weird sound as you almost fell backwards when he pulls your chair towards him, but he wraps an arm around your shoulders to catch you from falling and he lets it stay there.
"i could've fallen!!" you scream-whisper at him, not wanting to get kicked out of the library, and he purses his lips.
"told you to come closer but you didn't, your fault."
glaring at him, your eyes burn two holes in his glasses, but he only stares at you. honey-hued eyes exploring your face intently, as if he's searching for something, like an answer to his worries. of course with the way he's looking at you, your face heats up and a blush places itself on your cheeks.
"is there something on my face?" you ask, breaking eye contact because suddenly the bookshelves that provide you two some privacy seem more interesting than his stupid handsome face.
"yeah, there is something on your face," he teases and you tried to turn away from him but the arm holding your back proves it difficult for you to escape his gaze.
covering your face with one hand, and rubbing your cheeks with the other, makes him let out a small laugh and when you look at him, oh how your heart swoons— 2 years of crushing on him, and even now that he's yours, still makes your heart beat like crazy— a small smile graces his features, accompanied with rosy cheeks as he looks at you.
"you're good," he tells you.
"but, you told me i had something on my face."
"yeah," he pauses and he gently takes ahold of the hand covering your face, making him see you.
"it's called you're pretty."
your eyes widen and you drop your head on his shoulder, making him laugh softly. you punch his chest with your hand and it makes him smile.
"since when did you learn shit like this," you mumble.
"what do you mean? i always had it in me, idiot," he pauses. "it only applies to you though."
lifting your head up, you squint your eyes at him, "who are you and what did you do to kei?"
he smiles at you before looking down, shaking his head. when he looks up he fixes his glasses and the look on his face is a little more serious now, but there's still a glint of playfulness in his eyes.
"okay, but i really have something to say for a long time now," he looks away and furrows his brows. "it's more of do, actually."
"okay, go on."
he looks back at you and his eyes quickly flick from your eyes to your...
oh.
oh, that explains why.
he clears his throat and awkwardly reaches a hand out to cup your cheeks. he gets a little bolder when you lean into his touch, as if you were saying that it was okay. so, he slowly leans in, closing his eyes before letting his lips touch yours. he relaxes into your hold, the stress that's been piling on him for the past few weeks dissipate as your lips slowly move against his. the way you two were so awkward with it indicates it's both your first kiss, but it's sweet and he wouldn't have it any other way. he pulls away and rests his forehead on yours, his eyes are still closed as he slowly breathes, relishing your warmth.
he's burning and he doesn't think he can look at you but when your soft voice rings in his ears, he can't help but smile.
"that's why you've been so restless, huh?"
he opens his eyes and hums, looking at your flushed face. "it's our first kiss and i wanted to make it perfect but i couldn't find the right timing."
he thought of that?
his words make you melt and you can't help but coo at him— the fact that he wanted to make it perfect, makes you fall for him all over again
"aw baby, anything with you is special and perfect," you place your hands on his shoulders, softly caressing them.
"i don't need grand gestures like the ones in movies," you start and he listens. "our love shouldn't be like the ones you see in books and poetry to make it special."
"because i have everything perfect i want," cupping his face with both your hands, you kiss his nose. "right here."
he smiles and kisses your wrist before he lets out a laugh through his nose, "you're a sap."
"only for you though," you wink and he pulls you in for a hug, making you wrap your arms around him.
"yeah, me too," he sighs as he caresses your head before kissing your temple.
"only for you."
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wizkiddx · 3 years
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hiii!!! omg please please pleasee do a part two of 3 hearts broken cus it fucking slaps miss girl
part 2 to 3 broken hearts!!! ive been so 🥺 at all the lovely comments+interest pt 1 had so thanku all !
summary: serious serious angst again will tom somehow get it back (unlike looking cos boy is a fool)
warnings: again lots of swearing (im British sorry not sorry) / wayyyy too much tea / slating Dom abit (obvs fictional but idk if I like the guy sorry his opinions are :/) / commitment issues
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
read part 1 here!!!!
That was three days ago now. Three days since you'd spoken to your boyfrien- well, Tom. It wasn't evident what the situation was.
The typical British weather brought with it the most ironic pathetic fallacy you could ever see. The clouds were dark and glooming, firing angry pellets of rain out as hard as they could. When you had pulled up on the roadside, it had just been a light drizzle but synchronised with your anxiety levels rising - so did the rain. When you finally opened up the car door, you threw your hoodie open with a sigh before running up the pathway to the front door.
It was the same burgundy red that you knew so well, but this time instead of just letting yourself in - you stood in the rain used the brass knocker thing twice. To be honest, you were hoping that no one was home - but in that house, it was pretty unlikely. After 30 seconds of getting drenched in the downpour, you were about to let yourself in with the spare key before the door swung open.
"Oh! Er Y/n?"
"Yeh um hi." You had to shout a bit over the sound of what must now be classified as a storm.
"Toms not-"
"I know. Can I come in?" As awkward and stunted as this conversation was, if you didn't get out of the rain asap you would literally end up drowned.
“Oh er yeh-yeh yeh come in.”
Harry stammered as he held the door open, gesturing for you to enter into the tiled hallway. Gratefully, you followed, throwing your sopping wet hood back down and wiping your feet on the floor.
"Sorry for just showing up, but I left some scripts here. My management are on my arse to read them and-"
"And you waited till Tom left for mum and dads?" The fluffy-haired boy has caught you red-handed; there was no defence, so you didn't even try.
Because yes, you knew on a Friday afternoon when Tom was home he would always, like clockwork, go to his parents just to kick back and watch gogglebox with both of them. It was only natural then that you chose Friday afternoon to come and pick up your stuff.
"I've been waiting in my car for half an hour till I saw him leave." Harry half laughed at that, still the two of you standing opposite each other in the hallway. "Um, do you… do you hate me Harry?"
Clearly, he hadn't quite been expecting your question going by the way his eyes almost bugged out his head.
"No, I-I, of course, I don't… look, I'm home alone so you fancy a cuppa?" Not being able to help the small chuckle, you nodded appreciatively, following Harry through the house.
"Your answer to everything is tea."
Harry had prepared the two mugs in silence as you sat at the table waiting patiently - if nervously too. You didn't miss how Harry had still used your favourite mug, having had to dig through the cupboard to find the weird square-shaped thing. Once done, he rounded the kitchen island and placed it in front of you, which you instantly cradled in two hands - for the hope of warming you up.
"You cold?" Obviously, it was pretty evident that sitting in your rain-soaked hoodie was not cosy at all. "Hang on a sec."
The boy sprung up again, returning moments later with a hoodie in hand, one he offered out to you with a little smile. The issue was that him and Tom shared clothes, so the hoodie he was kindly offering to you also had been worn by Tom before. Which made it hurt a little bit to wear. It was better than sitting soaked through though.
"How have you been then?"
"Not the best, to be honest, but uh… how about you?"
"Being with Tom while he's fighting with you? Oh, it's a barrel of laughs. You might've escaped it, but I haven't." He was trying to lighten the mood, and you appreciated it, offering him a half-smile that didn't really meet your eyes.
"Yeh sorry about that."
"Don't apologise; it doesn't sound like it's your fault Y/n."
That surprised you. Tom, especially when he was in moods like he was when you argued, wasn't one to admit when he was wrong. It was usually how the world was against him and how he was so hard done by. Accepting responsibility was something he hadn't said to you yet - but at least, small steps.
"He say that?"
"Pretty much… doesn't seem like he's angry at you, but-but he's still angry."
"At the world?" You rolled your eyes; this seemed to be the same old Tom through and through. Still immature. Still not with the right mindset.
"At himself." Harry countered, slightly entertained, when he saw the flash of surprise in your face as he sipped his drink. "And me… if I dare to so much as breathe this week."
This time you properly laughed, and Harry joined in too before the room fell back to silence - except the noise of the rain hitting the garden patio slats. You swirled the tea round in your mug, feeling the brunette's eyes on you. He'd always been your fake little brother too, since you'd met the Hollands way back 3 and a half years ago. Tom and yourself were barely adults, which meant the twins were still proper children. Harry had always been the one that understood you. Hollands, by nature, loved humans - loved to talk, to chat, to gossip. But sometimes, doing all that socialising got too much for you, as it did for Harry. He was the only one that seemed to understand social exhaustion. So when those moments had hit, you'd kept each other company in silence.
He got you, sometimes in ways your own boyfriend didn't.
"You know why he got so worked up, right?" You shook your head, looking up curiously. "Dad got under his skin on his birthday zoom thing."
Ah, now that did seem to coincide with the start of Tom's more petulant phase. To be fair, Tom had been asking to move in together for near enough a year now - but it was only in the past month it seemed to be the only thing you'd talk about and obviously only three days since the flight back. Dom's birthday barely a week ago, whilst you and Tom were both filming - except Tom had managed to get a day off where you hadn't. So you hadn't heard this conversation.
"What'd he say?"
"Was talking about how he and mum were settling down at Toms age, joked about how you rejected him, said maybe you were holding out for something better."
"Something better?" Harry sighed, leaning forward onto his elbows.
"He'd seen an article just off a trashy tabloid… it named you Hollywood's golden girl or something, said you could have the pick of any person on the planet…"
Of all the people in the world, why is Tom affected by shit journalism? He knows how much bullshit people write. He knows how it's all made up, exaggerated nonsense. And what he should know, completely and totally, is how much you love him. And if he didn't, was that your fault? Had you done something wrong, something to make him doubt you?
Harry seemed to notice the internal dialogue going on in your head, adding to the point. "It wasn't the article though, it was the fact dad said it."
Hmmm.
You and Dom got on; it wasn't like you hated the possible future father in law or whatever. Just…. you had very different outlooks. As much as Tom prided himself on how' grounded his family keeps him' -to you at least, they aren't entirely at sea level either. They'd never really had any particular struggles in life. They were the definition of middle class, and that's about it. They lived in a posh suburb of London, had all their family still around. It was the perfect family.
And whilst you were in no illusions about how privileged your life was now. It hadn't always been. You'd never had the 'nuclear' family. Instead, only your dad and a string of dodgy and fleeting stepmothers while struggling to make ends meet. So you were just always wary of Dom, of his opinions that so often his boys took for gospel. They always seemed pretty sheltered and close-minded.
And yet, Tom was a grown man.
"I get that, I just… Tom should know that we know more about our relationship than his dad. I mean,… have I done something wrong? Made him think I'm not in this for the long haul?"
"No nonono Y/n he's just… well he's an idiot, isn't he? I don't think he properly understands why you're cautious about moving and everything. He's just an idio- "
Harry was cut off for lightly insulting his brother by the sound of the front door opening, both of your heads swivelling towards the source. You then met Harry's eyes in a panic, to which he replied relatively simply.
"Just talk to each other. For my sake." You would've argued if it weren't for the fact you were so focused on Tom's shuffling around in the entrance hallway - back early from his parents.
"Baz? Where you at? I thought I saw Y/n's car and-"
"Kitchen!!!" Before Tom could say anything else, possibly landing himself in more trouble, Harry interrupted as his chair screeched while standing up. And then Tom was just there. Standing in the doorway, his arms dropping limply to his side as he noticed you. Everything about that moment seemed to freeze, when you locked eyes with him for the first time in three days. It didn't go unnoticed, the way his Adams apple bobbed, the way his eyes widen. The boy looked plain and simply terrified.
It was Harry who broke the silence, after giving you a stern look that said 'stay'. The younger Holland boy walked up to Tom and spoke.
"Try actually talking and actually listening about your problems with each other." And then he was gone, down the hallway and up the stairs.
For a few moments, Tom stayed absolutely stationary, now staring at where Harry had been when speaking to the both of you (but mainly Tom). Long enough to put your sense of unease at an all-time high, ready to make a break for it.
"If you don't want to talk, then I can leav-"
"NO!" Apparently snapping out of it, Tom exclaimed loud enough to make you flinch from your seat. "Sorry! I-I just… I wasn't expecting to… you know, to see you."
"Yeh I just uh- just came to pick up some scripts… Harry cornered me with a tea, though; otherwise, I'd be…."
"Baz thinks the whole world could be fixed with tea."
"that's what I said!" You instinctively responded, forgetting the fact you're supposed to be mad at him, and just for a second falling back into your normal flow.
Tom didn't even try to hide his grin in response, until you quickly corrected your face- then he did too. Turning around to put the kettle on for himself. Because right now, he needed to fix his whole world, and he needed all the help he could get. For a period, the only noise was the sound of the kettle boiling, then the teaspoon clinking against the mug as he stirred - until he padded over, taking the seat across from you.
"So."
"So."
"It's been a while," Tom stated the bloody obvious.
"You never called."
"Didn't think you'd want me to."
You thought that the early signs weren't all that auspicious. His ability to read a situation once again failing.
"I wanted you to say something."
"Say what?"
"What do you think Tom?" He replied to the sarcastic tone by sucking in a sharp breath, holding it for a second, before slowly exhaling. As if trying to compose himself, take time to think of a response - a mature move for him.
"Well, I think you want me to say sorry? For being so moody and not waiting for you and for upsetting those kids. And thanks too, for covering for me?"
You just hummed. Waiting for him to continue. Because yes, you did deserve all those things. But you also deserved more. An apology for, oh I don't know, saying he didn't think you loved him? It was a wait that never ended, he had nothing more to add.
"Going by your face, I take it I missed something?"
The bloody cheek of it.
"Theres nothing else? Nothing else at all? …" You gave him that chance, the opportunity but all he could respond with was a shake of his head. "You thought I was fine about you saying that I don't love you?" You hadn't intended on raising your voice, but really you hadn't realised you did till after the fact. To blinded by rage at his ignorance.
"You want to talk about this now?"
"When else Tom?" You sighed, realising he perhaps wasn't ready for this conversation. Maybe he needed more time to think things through, have sense talked into him by various wiser family members. Or maybe, he never would be. That was the worst-case scenario. But also… you're most likely prediction.
He shuffled in his seat, clearing his voice but not saying anything. Not a peep.
"I have spent three years of my life with you. I've had countless nights of too little sleep because that was the only time you could facetime. I've exposed my relationship to the world and people's opinions because you didn't want to hide. All I've done is love you. How could you even say that?" There might've been tears in your eyes, yet you were determined to keep them at bay. You needed to have this out, one way or another, to be clear and cohesive and logical. No time to cry.
"Y/n I know that, I…" He sighed, instinctively reaching for your hand, but you were quicker to pull it away. There was hurt in his eyes, but so there should be. "It just sometimes feels like that's it for you. That yeh you love me but you just want to standstill. That this is as much as it'll ever be."
Your emotions were suddenly uncontainable. Your voice croaked as you whispered, "Have I done something wrong?"
"No love, nonono if that's how you feel then that's okay. But it's something I'm not… shit this is hard." He took a pause to take a sip of his drink, your glazed eyes never leaving his. "I don't think I can stand still anymore. And yeh I was pissy and childish the other day because my dad got under my skin about the whole moving in thing… But these past few days, it just has got me thinking. Because I love you, so much."
This time when he reached out to grab your hand, you actually leaned into it yourself. Not because you were giving in, but because this hurt. This hurt so fucking much that you needed something to ground you, or else god knows. Because the way he was speaking, it sounded so finite.
"I love you too."
"I do know, which is…is why this is so hard." At the very least, Tom had conceded that.
The conversation ceased to silence yet again. The room felt so cold; even Tom/Harry's hoodie was doing nothing to keep you from the endless empty cold that seemed to be coming from within.
"When I re-registered my health card last month, and I made you my emergency contact on it. I-I made you my next of kin on everything actually. I didn't think about it twice. And-and this-"You pulled your phone out of your back pocket, immediately pulling up the app onto the open page. "This is my Pinterest board for our baby's nursery theme. I know-" You paused, to quickly wipe your cheeks clear of the tear tracks that may or may not have been there. "I know it's probably a long way away, but I just love the Scandinavian theme." You laughed at yourself, suddenly embarrassed at your blabbering and quickly pulled up a different app. "And this… this was from the other week when I was helping Y/bf/n start her vows." Hands trembling as you turned the phone around for Tom to see again. "She was finding it really tricky so she said, what would you say to Tom on your wedding, so-so I made this list." You only dared to look at him when you were sure he'd be reading through that note.
It was bizarre because he looked… well, he looked happy. Here you were feeling traumatised, showing things that you'd barely even deeped how committed they were - and he was pleased? Feeling the fire burn once again inside of your chest, you quickly swiped the phone away and back into your pocket. Only then did he look up, eyes widening - presumably at quite how psychotic you looked.
"So don't you dare say that I don't want a future with you."
You said it with such force, there was a pause. Tom letting those words sink deep into his brain. The way his expression flickered minutely gave you hope. You thought he got it. You thought he really understood now.
"But why don't you want to move in then?"
There it was again. He knew why. But he didn't get it. And, probably, he never would.
You were about to crash completely. So you ran. As fast as your legs could carry you, not even aware of your chair crashing to the floor in your wake. You ran out of that house and away from him. Away from who you had thought was the love of your life.
?give tom a final chance w one last part?
feedback is always v v appreciated <3
tom taglist : @lovehollandy12 @hollandlover19 @thefernandasantana @hunnybunimdun @hallecarey1@cedricdiggorysimpp @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @pandaxnienke @crossyourpeter @thegirlwiththeimpala @tom-softie @sunwardsss @spiitfiiires @radcloudenthusiast @ladykxxx08
people i think might be interestd in this (sorry if not just let me know and i'll remove the tag!!!): @obiwanownsmyass @wildxwidow @parkersvogue @coffeewithoutcaffeine @tomhollandlol @thefallenbibliophilequote @clumsymandu @hiraethenthusiast @mannien @abrielleholland @evermorehabit @niallberry @greatpizzascissorstaco @runawayolives @annathesillyfriend @letsgotothemoonlight @lovelybarnes
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fruitoftheweek · 3 years
Text
Little Cherry Book:
Chapter 4:Showered in Sin
Chapter 1 Here / Chapter 2 Here / Chapter 3 Here
Hey guys! I'm sorry that it has taken so long for me to update this. I had an idea of what I was going to write but I had a super hectic week so I wasn't able to write this till now. In order to make up for it, I have given you a treat. A 6,502 word chapter. It kinda beat my ass but I had so much fun writing it. It's sweet, it's spicy, it's all the goodness you guys deserve. I was listening to Duvet by Boa while writing this and I think you should too for two reasons. One, it helps set the mood, but also oh my fucking god it's such a good song. Also, Boa is just a fucking great band. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and message me if you would like to be added to the tag list! Love you guys
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Pairing: Spencer Reid X reader
Chapter Plot: After a game of drunk never have I ever after a long case, Morgan locks Spencer out of their shared room. Shenanigans ensue and you and Spencer share a couple of firsts.
Series TW: 18+, smut, degradation, piercing, choking, knife play, mommy/daddy kinks, spanking, exhibitionism, Will update as time goes on
Chapter TW: smut, slight mommy kink, having body piercings, choking, slight blood kink (not really, it's just hard to explain), Shared masturbation (male and female receiving), pleading, multiple orgasms, cumming in pants, shower sexiness, aftercare
Word Count: 6,502
Your deep cherry lipstick painted the white seal of the wine bottle you held in your hand as you laughed at something Elle said. Spencer couldn't help but let a small smile pass his lips as he took in your form, hot from the day's work, small strands of your hair sticking to your forehead, a dewy glow illuminating your rosy cheeks.
After a long week, they had found Carl Arnold before he had been able to kill the Dunken family and even coerced a confession out of him. With spirits running high, Elle had suggested some much-needed relaxation before taking off the next day. Since you were rooming alone, you volunteered to host in your room. Morgan had arrived at your hotel room with two bottles of some sort of liquor, one clear and one amber, JJ trailing in toe with your bottle of red wine you had asked for. You pulled out your little corkscrew with the face of an old man on it, knowing she hated his weird little face. You brought it with you on trips, just in case the occasion arose.
And it did arise as Elle suggested a drinking game. Hotch had retired early after calling Hailey to get an update on his very pregnant wife, while Gideon preferred the solitude of a good book late at night. The rest of you sat on the floor surrounded by drinks and snacks. With the supervision gone, it almost felt like a high school party with no parents. You all had all settled on a classic, never have I ever. "We haven't played this in a long time because we already know so much about each other, but it's fun when we have a newbie around," Morgan said giving you a cheeky smile and bumping your shoulder. Already pliable after the couple of drinks you had while Elle explained the game, you nodded before tipping your lips to the cusp of Spencer's ear. "I'll try not to make it too hard for you, pretty boy," you said. The small puffs of air that left your mouth made Spencer's hair stand on end and his feet curl.
He knew you were teasing him that night and he loved it. He decided to keep his knees tucked to his chest for the rest of the night as to not expose the predicament in his pants. He watched the way you lightly sucked on the wine bottle as you tipped it back, a thin river of cabernet leaking from the corner of your lips and trailing down your neck. Spencer wanted nothing more than to lean over and lap it off of you just to see how you would react, but he knew it was the drinks talking. Despite your earlier comment, it was quite obvious that you were targeting him as his head started to spin gently.
"Never have I ever had sex with someone much older than me," Garcia said through her video feed with a cheeky smirk. Derek had insisted on including her even though she wasn't physically present. She sat bundled up in a comfy blanket in her office with a mug of some sort of alcoholic beverage. "HEY! No targeting! Plus, I told you that in confidence at ladies night. How much is much older?" You said, swaying your bottle towards the computer set up on the floor."You know how much older I mean sweetheart." Garcia said with a giggle as you groaned and took a sip."How much older is much older?" Morgan said with a cocked eyebrow, somewhere between impressed and surprised." I was a college student, experimenting with my professor. Not like an old man, but he was 20 years older than me. Definitely not my style anymore though." You said with a grimace remembering him.
Spencer had learned a lot about your sex life during that game, but some part inside of him smirked, knowing that the rest of the team would never know you as he knew you, not unless they too had read your journal. It was the only thing keeping his head clear of the idea of you with anyone else. Not that you were with him in any capacity, but the idea still made him feel something in his stomach. Not the sweet butterflies that came with your smile, but something more like idiotic hornets dangerously bumping against the walls of his stomach.
Spencer hadn't even noticed the uproar of everyone else around the circle at your comment and the second revelation that Morgan had drunk too. He was too busy watching how you had shyly tucked your hair behind your ear, finally letting it down out of your clips for once. You were wearing your pajamas, just a tank top, slouchy sweater, and flannel pajama pants, but somehow you looked more radiant than ever. He had come back down to earth after hearing someone call his name."Y-Yes?" He sputtered out, realizing you had been trying to get his attention."It's Morgan's turn, pay attention." You said, gently smacking your hand down on his thigh.
If he was riled up before, he was unbelievably undone at the slight sting from where your palm had just been. Light enough that it wasn't noticeable, but hard enough that it erupted a Shockwave through his body, centered on the location of the contact. He bit back the whimper threatening to escape his lips as he turned towards Morgan, trying desperately to not watch you from the corner of his eye.
"Never have I been a virgin at 24," Morgan said, beaming in his direction. Spencer took a big gulp from his glass of whiskey."You always do that one, I don't know why you think it's so funny, you're just trying to get me to drink" he said abashedly. He looked over at you, nervous for your reaction, but you seemed unfazed. "Hey, that's a wonderful gift to have, there's something so special about virgins. Maybe it's the idea that everything is new, but I like it. I love virgins." You said, taking a sip from your bottle, gently swaying. You had given up on never have I ever and just decided to drink whenever you felt like it. Maybe it was because you were tipsy, maybe it was the warm flush that decorated Spencer's cheeks, maybe it was the way he was looking at you with sultry, half-lidded eyes. You couldn't tell, but something made you want to find an excuse for you two to be alone.
"Geese, we seemed to have caught a succubus tonight." Morgan quipped."A suck-you-what now?" You said, cocking an eyebrow at him. " A succubus, it's a demon or supernatural entity in folklore, in female form, that appears in dreams to seduce men, usually through sexual activity. According to religious traditions, repeated sexual activity with a succubus can cause poor physical or mental health, even death. In modern representations, a succubus is often depicted as a beautiful seductress or enchantress, rather than as demonic or frightening." Spencer shot out. "Wow, even when you're drunk, your big brain keeps chuggin' along," you said, sloppily ruffling his hair "A beautiful seductress or enchantress, huh?" That time it came out low, inaudible to the others, but it pierced Spencer like a knife."Do you think that's accurate bout me?" you asked, staring up into his eyes, closer than you have been before. Spencer let a cartoonish gulping noise escape his lips as he held back his urge to lean into your touch.
"Ah, it's my turn," you said, leaning back into your spot in the circle and sadly, away from Spencer." Never have I ever done something naughty at our work," you said, looking straight at Spencer "I'll know if you're lying, I can sniff out a liar from a mile away," your cocky smirk leaking out of your mouth. Everyone except you and JJ took a shot."Wow, really you guys? Even you Spence? " JJ said in disbelief, looking around the circle."Never have I ever, my ass" Spencer mumbled under his breath, just loud enough for you to hear, looking over at you, thinking about your pantieless escapades.
"Look at that, Doctor Reid, you need another drink, let me go fix you one," You said as you grabbed his glass in one hand, leaning and gripping hard into his shoulder with the other. It wasn't seen by the others, but between that and the fiery look in your eyes, it sent an obvious message,' keep your mouth shut or I'll shut it for you.' You used him as leverage to get up, nearly pushing him over as you gracefully stumbled to the hotel fridge. He knew what you meant, but he didn't care, your grip on him went straight into his imagination as he envisioned what that grip would feel like in other places. He kind of wanted to push his luck, just so he could see what he had in store.
And push it he did as you handed him the glass, reminding him that it was indeed his turn to play never have I ever. "Never have I ever slept with my professor," He said, obviously targeting you with a glint of mischief in his eyes."Oh yeah, well never have I ever been a virgin at 24." You said, swaying as you sat down."Morgan already said that, dummy. Never have I ever worn stupid dark red lipstick" He retorted, equally as drunk as you. At this point everyone else had zoned you two out and were focused on other things, refreshing their drinks, counting the ceiling tiles, humming a sloppy rendition of My My Miss American Pie, or in Penelope's case, all three."Yeah, well never have I ever been a complete and utter mommas boy!" You continued, the statement turning Spencer beet red. You watched him clench and unclench his hands, you had obviously struck a nerve. Just as you were about to apologize, he cut you off. "Never have I ever had nipple piercings!" He shouted, pointing at your chest, now drawing attention to the obvious balls framing your nipples that you had once been covered by your long-forgotten sweater.
As he said it, it felt like the world went in slow motion. You could see the instant regret on his face as you dropped your bottle in surprise. It had landed on Spencers discarded whiskey glass and both shattered, wine and whiskey mixing with glass to create a slurry on the ground between them. "Fuck! You Guys!" Morgan said, "You got it all over my clothes." "Me too," Echoed Elle as they both stood up in their soaked clothes. "I think that calls it a night." JJ said, closing the laptop on the image of an already sleeping Garcia." Bye you guys, sleep well," you called after them as you and Spencer rushed around looking for towels to clean up the alcohol with.
"Ow! Son of a bitch!" Spencer cried as you dropped the last of the glass in the garbage can. As you rounded the corner, you saw Spencer pulling a rather large shard of glass that you must have missed out of his thumb, blood pooling at the tip. Without thinking, you crouched down and sucked his thumb into your mouth." A-ah! What... What are you doing!?" Spencer asked breathlessly, looking down at you with a deep hunger in his eyes. You pop off his thumb and squeeze it at the base, slowing the blood flow."Shut up," You said," This helps slow the bleeding. The sucking applies pressure. My mom used to do this for me... And no, do not psychoanalyze that." You said, wrapping your mouth around his finger, sucking to provide some pressure to slow the blood flow. You could taste the iron in your mouth, but you didn't mind, knowing you were helping your friend.
You were helping alright, helping in more ways than you would ever understand. "Yeah, like I'm the only one here with mommy issues," he said distractedly, too busy surveying your lips wrapped around him. You slapped your hand down on his thigh once more, eliciting a small whimper from him. He couldn't help it, you were a sight of beauty, you always were, but looking down on you right then, Spencer wanted to bottle that moment forever. The tops of your breasts peeking out from the top of your tank top, your eyes filled with a hazy glow, looking up at him to make sure he was ok, and your cheeks hollowing out around his thumb as you delicately sucked on his wound. It was as close as Spencer had ever gotten to anything sexual. He could feel your tongue swirling around the cut, lapping up the last couple drops of blood. He couldn't help but imagine what it would be like if it was another appendage and not his thumb. You sucked on his thumb one last time, harder than you had previously, and before he even knew what he was doing, his hips bucked up, rubbing his hard cock against his pajama pants, finally relieving his mounting orgasm.
You let go of his finger with a pop as your tongue trailed off of the underside of his thumb. Spencer looked anywhere but you, as a wet patch formed through his thin underwear and pajama pants. He hurried to cover it with his sweater, shooting up from his seated position."Um, Um, I'm g-gonna go shower and go to bed." He said, hurriedly scurrying over to where he had left his room key." Sorry partner, I saw Morgan accidentally grab both of your keys on the way out. He's probably asleep by now." You said languidly, leaning back to take in the sight of the soft boy in front of you. Totally flushed with heat, small beads of sweat peppering his forehead, his hands twiddling suspiciously into his sweater in an attempt to conceal crotch, trying and failing miserably to hide his rapidly cooling cum.
He whined a little, lighting a fire in you. He looked so thoroughly fucked out, and all you had done was suck his finger. You knew that you just had to play with him some more. "You know, you can use my shower, doctor." You said, and he let out a small sigh of relief, heading towards the bathroom. "There is one condition, though," You smirked coyly as he halted his motions, his body facing away from you. It was almost as if he was ready to run away at any moment. You walked over to him, slowly, taking your time to tease him. The silence hung heavy in the air as you looked up into his eyes questioningly, waiting for him to ask. "Wh-what is the condition." He said, unable to return your gaze, hands fisted in the hem of his sweater, pulling it down even further. You smirked, dipping your hands up and under his sweater, nearly brushing his spent cock before gently placing them on his bare stomach, just above his waistband. He sucked in a tight breath as you gently swirled your fingers in the short hair that lead from his belly button down to happier places." Before I ask, do you know about the color scale?" you said, fingers smoothing out over his little stomach." Um, k-kinda?" He said, heat flushing his cheeks."Green means good keep going, yellow means slow down, and red means stop right now, ok?" You said, looking up at him as he nods."Come on pretty boy, I need verbal confirmation. I need to know that you understand, got it." You said with a little pinch to his tummy. "Y-Yes, I understand!" He blurted out, standing stiff as a board." Good boy. Now, for my condition. You can shower if you show me what you're hiding." You said, leaning close enough that if Spencer breathed, your chests would meet each other. "What color, Spencer?" you said, languidly drawing lines up and down his torso with your nails."G-Green, Very green." He sputtered out, finally meeting your eyes."That's what I like to hear, sweet boy." You said before your fingers danced below his waistline, now somewhat crusty from his cum."W-wait!" He says, just as you were about to take him in your hand. You instantly stopped and looked up at him gently."We can stop here baby, it's not a problem." You said, beginning to remove your hand from his pants. He grabbed your hand through his pants, stopping your movement."It-It's not that. I don't want to stop, I just want... well..." He said and looked down shyly. "What do you want baby, anything," You smiled up at him. "Um, I haven't had my first kiss yet and I kinda... Well... I kinda..." He said, shuffling his feet, face beet red. Your eyebrows shot up quickly in surprise before letting out a gentle smile."Do you want a kiss, pretty boy?" You said, gently brushing the hair out of his face. He nodded, and you grabbed his chin, bringing him close. "Use your words, pretty boy. What do you want?" You whispered, breath gently ghosting Spencer's lips as he took you in up close. He could see every little pore and dimple of your skin and every color hidden in the depth of your eyes and he knew he needed to have you.
He shakily leaned forward, lips gently meeting yours, so light that if you hadn't seen his actions, you wouldn't have even known if you had touched. You moved your hand down to his throat, giving a light squeeze."Come on genius, use your words," you said as he whimpered. "Please, can I kiss you, please, please?" He begged, leaning into your touch, pleading for you to squeeze again. His efforts shoot straight to your heart. You indulged him in a kiss, not as spicy as the situation would permit, more of a sweet heat. He came in too hot and heavy at first, but you kissed him languidly, gently stroking his cheek to get him in the rhythm. His arms were straight out at his sides, hands clenched as if he was willing every muscle in his body to not touch you.
You let out a small laugh as you melted into his kiss, soft, puffy lips dancing across yours. "You know you can touch me," You said, pulling back, smiling at the smear of your lipstick, now staining his lips, and the endearing puppy dog eyes he was giving you. "Where can I touch you?" He whispered out as if he were telling a secret. "Wherever you want, baby. Wherever your heart desires." You replied, bringing your arms up to wrap loosely around his neck, pulling your bodies closer. He was as stiff as a board as his hands flitted around trying to find a good place to land. He finally settled on weaving his arms around your waist and up to cradle your neck, gently carding his fingers through the hair that fell at the nape of your neck. There was something so sweet in the way he cradled your body with feather-light touches as if you would disappear like smoke if he lingered too long. You reveled in the feeling of you two pressed together, slightly uncomfortable at the stiff material of his pajama pants on your stomach.
"Hey sweetheart," You said, pulling away as he chased after your lips, "I'm feeling kinda sweaty from the day, would you like to join me in the shower? What color?" "G-green, yes please." He said, tentatively pressing a kiss to your collarbone, exposed as the strap of your tank top had fallen down. You unwound from him, taking his hand delicately in your own, instantly missing the warmth his body provided.
You lead him into the bathroom, carefully stepping over the wine-soaked towels discarded on the floor before shutting the door and turning to face him. "I don't want to take this too fast for you because I know it's all very new so always tell me how you are feeling and if everything is ok. I want this to be good for you baby, ok?" You said, squeezing his hand that was still intertwined with yours. "Ok, th-thank you," He said shyly.
"Now, what do you want to do first? You're probably pretty uncomfortable in those pants, do you want me to take them off you?" You said, hooking one of your fingers into his waistband, pulling on in slightly creating a much-needed separation between his sticky cock and his uncomfortable pants."Y-Yes please" He said as you turned on the shower, allowing it to warm up in preparation for cleaning him off before turning back to him. You gently grabbed the hem of his sweater and pulled it over his head, leaving him shirtless in front of you.
Lean muscles were hidden under a layer of peachy soft skin highlighting the gentle trail of dark curly hair leading from his belly button down past his pants. His arms curled around himself as he watched your eyes carefully, ready for some sort of judgment. "I know I'm not really that s-strong or anything but I can work on it-" You cut him off with a gentle kiss right above his belly button, startling him. You looked up sweetly into his eyes and gave him a soft smile, saying "You are so beautiful, Spencer. Morgan calls you pretty boy, but he truly has no idea. I would have you no other way than you are right now."
You gently peppered his chest with feather-light kisses, making him blush. He finally understood why people liked hickeys because as you trailed down his chest, the little wine red lipstick you had left on your lips left marks trailing down his chest. Some part of him wished they were permanent, showing off to all that could see, and they would know exactly who he belonged to. You dipped your hand into his waistband, asking, "What color?" "Green, very green," he choked out as your breath ghosted across his abdomen. You looked so beautiful, kneeled on the floor in front of him, taking care of him so gently and treating him so sweetly that he could feel his cock begin to harden again.
You looked up into his eyes as you pulled his pants down. He let out a soft sigh of relief as he was uncaged from his unfortunate trouser situation. His cock flipped down out of his pants, nearly smacking you in the forehead as you looked up at it in awe. Even though it was only semi-hard, it was bigger than any you had ever seen before. Spencer looked down at you shyly "it's not that much, I-I know but I've been researching techniques to make up for it in order to give sufficient pleasure for you- I mean for whatever partners I may have, not that I am saying that I won't please you, I dream of pleasuring you! ... I'm digging myself a hole aren't I."He rambled, rubbing the back of his neck worriedly. "Spencer, you are huge. Way more than I have ever had before. See?" You said, standing up, gently lifting his cock in your hand, measuring it against your stomach.
Maybe Spencer hadn't noticed because it was proportionate to his body and his big hands, but being held in your petite hands and measured against your stomach, he finally did see how much he would fill you up. The tip of his dick just barely reached past the gems that decorated your belly button piercing. "W-Woah." He said growing harder at the thought of pushing so deep into you. He looked up to your face, which was preoccupied with looking down at how far he would reach up in you.
Tearing your eyes away from him and up to his own, you flushed, knowing that he had caught you staring. "What would you like me to do next?" You spoke softly. Despite being the only two in the room, you two both talked in hushed tones, worrying that anything more than that would burst the delicate bubble you two had created. "Can we match?" He said, and you instantly understood him, despite the odd vernacular. You began to slip off your shirt, but he stopped you with an arm on your shoulder. "C-Can I do it?" He said shyly. "Of course, pretty baby," you barely get out before he drifted his hands under your tank.
He slowly lifted your top over your head as he took in the soft smooth feeling of your skin against his, goosebumps pricking up wherever his fingers trailed. You stood in front of him, shirtless as he took in your form. He had imagined what your breasts would look like. Nipples always hard due to your piercings, what your jewelry would look like, but nothing could prepare him for the glimmering moonstone gems that adorned your nipples and navel. Everything matched exactly, including the delicate necklace you wore around your neck.
The only thing he liked more than the perfection of your body was the features that made you, you. Some might call them imperfections, but to Spencer, all he could see in you was beauty. The gentle bruises on your skin from tangles with unsubs, the soft stretch marks that adorned your hips like little valleys and winding rivers, the slight blemishes, and hairs. He loved it because you were the embodiment of the confidence he wished for in himself. While he was always nervous about his body and how others perceived him, you loved yourself for exactly who you were, and you loved him for exactly who he was.
He pulled down your pants, gently following the twist and turn of the stretch marks as they winded down your hips, making sure to kneel down to pull them all the way off of you as you delicately stepped out, gently grabbing onto his hair to keep your balance as you swayed. He moaned softly at the gentle tug of your fingers while he stared up at you in awe. You took his hand in yours, coaxing him to stand.
You both stood there, taking in each other's forms for a moment, hands still connected as if by a thread at the pinky before you spoke. "We shouldn't waste water. Let me clean you off, sweetheart." He nodded before following after you into the gentle spray of the shower, steam now filling the room. He marveled at the way that the water droplets cascaded down your body, gently running down your curves. "Come here," you said, pulling him into a gentle embrace under the hot water.
Your two bodies pressed gently together, and Spencer couldn't help but think that you were molded for each other. Not in the way that a sculptor may stick two unmatched pieces of clay together with slip, more like one rock that had been split by the earth finally returning together. Something about your touch felt like home as you gently cradled him under the water.
He was so enthralled in your being that he didn't notice you gently scrubbing him with a washcloth until the scent of your body wash permeated the air. You gently scrubbed his back, washing off the sweat of the day and replacing it with you. He melted into you as your hands reached up, lathering his hair with shampoo. He wasn't sure if it was because he realized you should probably be getting washed too or because he desperately wanted to ride his hands along the planes of your body, but he decided to lather up his hands and wash you as well. "You are such a good boy. Thank you for cleaning me up" You said, resting your head gently on his chest, softly swirling the soap around his back, now finished scrubbing all you could from that angle, waiting to turn him around.
He moved carefully, avoiding your butt, still too nervous to touch. "Make sure you get everything, sweet boy. I like to be clean when I go to bed." You said, gently grabbing his hand and pulling it down to cup your butt. He inhales a sharp breath as he indulged in a gentle squeeze, continuing to wash you. He washed your back but his hands would occasionally drift down to your ass, growing more confident as he unknowingly rocked into you slightly with every squeeze, letting out soft keening noises.
You peeled yourself off of him as he rutted into the air, whining at the loss of friction. "Slow down, naughty boy. Bad boys don't get to touch. Are you a bad boy?" you asked as you placed a finger on the tip of his cock, swirling it in the precum pooling there despite the water's efforts to wash it off. "No, no! I'm a good boy! You're just so pretty, and you feel so good, and you smell so nice, and I wanna touch you, and I want you to touch me, please." He blurted out, looking at you with hungry eyes, begging for more friction. "Where do you want to touch me baby?" you asked as his eyes raked over your body, taking in all of his options. "I want to touch your boobies and your- your-" "My what? You can say it, naughty boy." You cut him off in his stammering. "Your pussy, I want to touch your pussy." He said, the hot water spreading the blush from his cheeks down his chest, tingeing his cock with a pretty pink hue. "What naughty words from such a pretty boy. You can touch-" he cut you off, lunging towards your body before you grabbed him by the throat, squeezing experimentally. Not too hard, not too soft. He moaned, and you felt the vibrations traveling up your hands."Let me finish what I was saying. Naughty boys don't get to touch. They get spanked." You said as he mewled." What I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted was that you can touch, AFTER I wash you and after you finish washing me. Only after, you got it?" you said, squeezing a little tighter. "Y-yes." he croaked out. "Good boy," you replied.
You washed out the shampoo in his hair, replacing it with conditioner as he did the same for you. You squirted more soap onto your washcloth, preparing to test him. You took the washcloth in your hand, slowly working over his legs, arms, and chest, teasingly brushing over his overspent cock before returning to cleaning him. He washed you thoroughly, taking care to wash your legs before making sure your stomach and belly button piercing were thoroughly cleaned. Finally, he reached up to wash the leftover makeup off of your face. He touched you like a porcelain doll, worried that you would crack under even the slightest pressure, making you giggle. He flinched, thinking he hurt you, but you grabbed his face in your hands, delivering him a kiss that covered his face in soap.
You both stood there, laughing for a second, relishing the moment before you let out a shy smile. "You can touch my chest now, but make sure you clean my piercings carefully." He looked down at your chest, and now that he'd been given permission, he didn't really know what to do. You could see the puzzled look on his face so you grabbed one of his soapy hands in yours and brought it to your breast. He squeezed experimentally, and you let out a gentle moan. You had been keeping in your arousal to draw out his teasing, but you couldn't hold yourself back as you felt his large hands grasp around your chest and roll your nipple in his fingers.
There was a sweet dichotomy in the harshness of his grasp on your boob, coupled with the gentle twist of your nipple. It was as if he was worried to hurt your piercings, so he made up for it in his grasp. You brought the washcloth down to his cock, hard against his stomach, and began to work him. He whined at the harsh material. "I need to clean you up, baby. You still have a cummy cock. If you beg hard enough when I'm done, I will touch you." You said into his ear as he rested his head on your shoulder.
He was overstimulated, and you could tell, so you decided you wouldn't take as long as you wanted to tease him. But you would still draw it out for your own pleasure. He was bucking and mewling into you as you roughly got him off. It shot you straight to your core, the heat from the shower mixed with his grasp on you, physically and visually, had you closer than you wanted, and deep down you just wanted him to touch you.
When you deemed him clean enough you let the rag drop to the floor. "Beg" you moaned out. "Please, please touch me, I want your hand on me, that's all I want." He whined, bucking into the air. You took pity on him, grasping him with your soap-covered hand. He hissed as your soft touch replaced the rough rag and you could tell he was close. "Touch me, Spencer." You said and his hand shot to your core. His tentative moves giving way to a natural confidence. As he slipped a hand between your folds he could feel you dripping with desire. "O-Oh my god," was all he could stammer out before sinking two of his fingers into your depths, thumb circling your clit. You knew his fingers were long, and you had even fantasized about this exact moment, but nothing could prepare you for his actual length. He had said he did research but that was proven by how quickly he found your g spot and clit. You doubled over in pleasure as his fingers thoroughly fucked you out.
"Spencer, I'm so close, baby. Be a good boy and make me cum." You said, slumping against his shoulder, rubbing yourself against his hand. "Mommy, I'm cumming." He said, looking into your eyes as his body shuttered. His words ricochetted around in your brain, sending you over the edge as you cum all down his hand. You bit into his shoulder to muffle your scream, just as he matched you, cumming down your hand.
You came down from your high as Spencer nearly collapsed onto you. You took extra care in making sure he was all clean before helping him out of the shower and into a towel. He leaned against you the whole time as you got him ready for bed. You forced him to brush his teeth before dragging him to bed.
He sat at the edge, eyes bleary with sleep, taking in the events of the day. You sat behind him, gently toweling off his hair before brushing it and putting lotion on his body. He leaned into your touch, appreciating being cared for, feeling as if everything had been a dream. "C-Can I sleep here? I mean Morgan locked me out and I don't have pants and-" You cut him off with a gentle kiss."Of course, sweetheart, do you want to cuddle? It's ok if you don't or if you want this to be a one-time thing, it's all up to you, baby." You said, gently sweeping his hair out of his face as he looked up with eyes the size of dinner plates. "We can do this more than once? You'll let me? For real?" He asked. "Only if you want to sweetheart. This is all about you." You said, giving him a small smile tinged with a slight sadness. "That's not very fair, I want it to be about you too. What do you want?"
The question knocked you off guard. You're not used to people asking what you want. Usually, people just take and give none in return. The fact that Spencer Reid, your adorable virgin coworker was asking you what you wanted with such a sincere look, caused tears to prick into your eyes. "No one has asked me that in a long time," you smiled, "I would love to do this, and more again with you Spencer. Whenever you want." He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you down so you were lying next to each other on the bed. "Whenever we want" He corrected, cuddling into you.
You surveyed the bite make you left on his shoulder, running your hand over it. "Sorry for marking you up, I didn't mean to hurt you." You said softly as he blushed. "I-I was actually wondering... well... could you maybe give me a hickey? I like that you marked me." He said. You obliged him, giving him long kisses and sucks, gradually working up your force until a large purple bruise had formed on his collar bone. He was gently moaning the whole time, but you didn't want to work him up again as he had already cum twice that night and you didn't think he could handle more. He looked down at it as you pulled away, and you could see a question lingering on his mind.
"What's up?" you asked, smoothing his hair with your hand. "You said you hadn't been asked what you want in a long time, and I was wondering, well... who gave you your piercings?" he asked tentatively and you laughed." You have been reading my book too much, how many chapters have you read?" You said and he looked up at you surprised."You knew? and... well... only 3 chapters. I didn't want to pry into your private life." He said. "You just pried enough to know I want to get pierced by someone?" You asked raising an eyebrow. Before he could get an excuse out, you cut him off. "Well for a genius, you obviously didn't read it that carefully. I said I WOULD like to be pierced during sex, meaning I have not before. These are just standard piercings from a piercing shop, not a big deal, I just like the way they look." You said and he let out a sigh of relief. "Why? d'you get jealous?" you questioned him. He looked down and nodded shyly.
"I can be a lot of firsts for you but if you play your cards right, you can be a lot of firsts for me too. You already gave me a first tonight. You called me mommy. No one's done that before but it was really hot. I liked it a lot." You said matter of factly. "But that is a conversation for another day. It is 2 am and we need to be on a flight at 7:30, so let's get some sleep." You said, turning off the lights and cuddling up close to him. In a matter of seconds, you both were asleep, tangled into each other's arms, both of you feeling, for once, safe and sound.
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Chapter 1 Here / Chapter 2 Here / Chapter 3 Here
Well wasn't that a doozy. I had so much fun writing that and I think it paid off for sure. Shoot me a message if you want to be added to my beloved tag list, speaking of which.
@spencer-reids-slut @ya-triedit @reidstoychest @flipperpenguins @thatsonezesty13 @jbbarnes-loki @big-galaxy-chaos
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nitewrighter · 3 years
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for the teen Titans ficlet thing, I don’t suppose you could do “there was only one bed” for robin and starfire?
*slams fist down on table* STARFIRE IS THE BIG SPOON.
----
"I think you are overacting," Starfire said, her arms folded across her garish tye-dyed nightshirt.
"Overreacting," Robin corrected, adjusting the waistband on his sweats as he stepped out of the bathroom, "And--I'm not. I've slept in lean-tos in the Alaskan hinterland and in literal trees in the Virunga mountains. I can handle a hotel floor."
Starfire scoffed. "You are being ridiculous! It is a bed! There is room for two! Plenty of my people sleep in Tesh'li!"
"Er..." Robin gave her a blank look and Starfire seemed to realize that that word hadn't translated over.
"Uhm..." Starfire's brow furrowed for a few seconds as she struggled for the closest english equivalent, "Tesh'li are like... clusters? P-piles? It is very common for families."
"...Tamaraneans sleep in piles?" Robin's brow crinkled at the mental image.
" Tesh'li. 'Piles' implies gravity is a strong factor in the composition of bodies," said Starfire.
"...right, floating..." Robin said quietly.
"The whole team had a big Tesh'li in that cave when we had that mission in Markovia!" Starfire said, clearly frustrated, "Beast Boy turned into a grizzly bear and Cyborg turned off his cooling systems to share body heat! You and Raven even shared your capes! Why is this worse? Am I worse?"
"It's not worse--I mean obviously you're not worse-- it's just---when it's just two people--" Robin drew in a tense breath through his teeth before slumping his shoulders, defeated. "It's like... an earth... thing."
"I am aware that earth has many things," said Starfire, clearly not satisfied with this answer.
Robin sighed.
"Oh!" Starfire perked up, "It is one of your earth intimacy hangups! Because large portions of your population spent several centuries convincing yourselves that your natural instinct to be close and reproduce were affronts to your creator deities! And that still lingers in your cultural practices!"
"Uh..." Robin didn't really have a response to that.
"I have been reading the Earth histories," said Starfire, a little smugly.
"That's great," said Robin, meekly.
“Well it is not like any of ‘the funny business’ will be happening,” said Starfire, using the finger quotes around the words ‘funny business.’ Robin really regretted letting Beast Boy teach her how to make air quotes with her fingers and that she had only been getting better at figuring out when to use them. “But I will respect your cultural practice and let you sleep on the floor, even though that is dumb and a little gross and you will wake up with the aching back.”
"You sure are a diplomat, huh?" said Robin, drily.
“Mm-hmm!” Starfire nodded.
This was supposed to be a victory in the argument for Robin--since Starfire was recognizing the boundaries he was laying out, but who was he laying them out for if she didn’t care about them? Himself? Alfred had made a point of bringing him up to be ‘proper’ and ‘gentlemanly’ (perhaps to make up for some shortcomings with Bruce) but Robin’s own childhood in the Circus was closer to what Starfire was describing--the performers spent so much time traveling and setting up and breaking down the circus that they had to catch sleep when they could, sleeping in piles, often with little regard for gender or age. He remembered sleeping splayed across his parents’ laps when he was small, or with his cheek smushed against Samson the Strongman’s bicep, or even in the pile of poodles, borzois, and border collies that made up the act of ‘Rivka’s Fabulous Tumbling Dogs.’ Sometimes he would even wake up with white greasepaint smudged in his hair from sleeping on one of the clowns’ shoulders. But now here he was, feeling like a bit of an idiot as Starfire pulled some sheets off the bed and the extra pillow and handed them over to him, before plopping down cross-legged on the bed herself and turning on the hotel room TV. 
“Did you want to watch something?” Starfire glanced at him.
“I’m fine with whatever you want to watch,” Robin shrugged.
Robin took the uncomfortable wooden chair next to the too-small hotel table where their mostly-eaten one-half pepperoni one half pineapple-anchovy pizza sat. Starfire quickly flicked through the channels until reaching a public access channel where a reindeer bellowed on the screen.
“The noble caribou,” the narrator spoke, “A proud fixture of the tundras of the north that have roamed these grass-covered polar deserts for thousands of years.”
Robin gave a glance over to Starfire who was lying on her stomach on the bed and kicking her feet back and forth, her chin in her hands like any preppy teenaged earth girl watching her favorite low-budget cringeworthy high school drama starring 29-year-olds.
“But this is not a story of the caribou, no we will focus on a friend who has been here even longer,” the camera panned down to a caribou gnawing some knotty, netted-looking substance from the ground, “That industrious, unsung hero: The lichen. This is... Life of Lichen.” 
“What happened to ‘World of Fungus?’” Robin tilted his head.
“You remembered?” Starfire perked up.
“I mean it’s your favorite,” Robin shrugged, “Or I guess this is your new favorite?”
“Life of Lichen is the sequel!” Starfire said excitedly, “Technically it is the third sequel. The first was ‘Our Friend the Algae,’ the second was, ‘World of Fungus’ and now it is ‘Life of Lichen!’ Because you need both algae and fungus to create it,” She paused a bit, “I can... change it if you prefer something else though.”
“Nah I kind of like it. It’s calming,” said Robin, “I used to only research stuff for like... missions and investigations... it’s nice to just... be interested in things.” He craned in his seat a little to see better.
“There is room,” said Starfire, scooting herself over, “You can see better here.”
Robin paused for a few seconds, then got up and took a seat on the bed, propping some pillows up against the headboard for himself to lean against. 
“While lichen bears superficial similarity to moss, there are many differences, the first starting with composition. Mosses, of course, are plants, while lichens are composite organisms, there are over 20,000 known species...” The documentary narrator continued talking as the camera panned across a rainbow of lichens on the side of a rock and Robin found his eyelids drooping, 
He could have sworn he only rested his eyes for a few minutes when he suddenly startled awake. Most of the hotel room lights were off, save for the bedside lamp, the credits were running on the TV and the previews were next week’s episode were promising to delve into the exciting world of lichens growing on trees, as opposed to this episode which mainly featured lichens growing on rocks.
“Starfire?” Robin said, his voice hoarse with sleepiness.
“Mm?” Starfire was already turning around and fluffing up her pillow, the faint green glow of her eyes creating a low spooky light in the room.
“The floor’s kinda gross,” said Robin.
“The floor is indeed gross,” said Starfire.
“Is it cool if--”
“It is very cool,” said Starfire. She reached and got the pillow he had on the floor next to the bed and passed it over to him.
“Alright,” Robin got under the sheets. Maybe he would have found more energy to be flustered about the action if he hadn’t been lulled by an hour of a husky British accent talking about lichens. Starfire seemed to be respecting his ‘earth intimacy hangups’ and slept on her side with her back to him.
“G’night,” said Robin.
“Sleep well,” Starfire’s voice was half muffled into her pillow as he turned off the bedside lamp.
It didn’t take too long for Starfire’s breathing to go slow and rhythmic, but Robin was still staring at the ceiling. 
God, I made that weird, he thought, Why did I have to make such a big deal about sleeping on the floor? I mean I literally was repeatedly saying it’s not a big deal and it wasn’t but now it’s a whole thing. What if she thinks I don’t like her? What if she knows I like her but she’s really pushing the alien thing so we don’t have to address it? No that’s awful, she wouldn’t do that--earth means too much to her to do that. That was shitty of me to think. ‘Earth Intimacy hangups.’ I don’t have earth intimacy hangups. I should probably let her know that it’s probably not cool to tell people they have ‘earth intimacy hangups’ right to their face. I’m cool with it though. Because I don’t make big deals of things. I mean it wouldn’t be a big deal to sleep on the floor. Oh god I’m obsessing over this. 
He turned on his side so that he was facing her back in the bed. He stared at her, watching her shoulders slowly shift with her breath. He tried to match the pace of his breath to hers. 
Tesh’li, huh? he thought, and he felt his eyelids get heavy. He imagined a distant world with high-ceilinged palaces, and a family sleeping in a pile on a heap of luxurious cushions and circular futons, one of their two daughters hovering upside-down just above them. His eyelids slowly slid shut, Doesn’t sound so bad...
He woke up at 2 in the morning drowning in hair.
Starfire was hovering about a half foot off the bed, half the blankets hanging off of her, still in that same ‘lying on her side’ position, though now angled so that the majority of her hair was piled directly on Robin’s face. Robin sputtered quietly, pushing hair out of his eyes and mouth and flinching hard as he realized Starfire was floating.
“Star-pft-fire?” he whispered hoarsely, still pushing hair from his face.
“Robinnn... Kan’ah peq lor-faon eshdarm...” Starfire murmured in Tamaranean.
“...What?” Robin said blankly before she dropped back down onto the bed with a bounce and a loud creak of mattress springs, still dead asleep. A cat-like snore escaped her as she readjusted herself in the blankets. Robin breathed in a steadying breath, coming to terms with what he had just seen and how it was all perfectly normal what with Starfire being an alien. Then he repeated that last mental sentence back to himself and wondered how long ago this work had claimed his sanity like it had claimed Bruce’s. He didn’t have long to dwell on that thought, however, as Starfire turned over in her sleep, wrapped her arms around him, and pulled him close, her alien strength moving him with the same ease as she might grab a stuffed animal.
“Star?” Robin whispered again as her arm snaked over his chest. He felt her body pressing into him from behind. His face was burning. 
“Hmm... Wurul tai horqarr, Silkie...” she mumbled, squeezing Robin close.
“Er.. Star--I’m not--Ggk!” Robin winced a little at the tight squeeze, wondering for a few seconds if he was going to get a broken rib,  but then Starfire seemed to nuzzle her cheek against his hair and her grip relaxed with a slight sigh.
Her hair was still enveloping him in a river of orange. She was warm--warmer than any human he could remember, and being in her arms felt like that almost- too-warm that’s perfect for dozing off while reading on summer afternoons. She smelled like ozone, and Lapsang-Souchong tea, and fresh-cut citrus. He wondered how he smelled to her. If he smelled like a memory of another planet. He listened to her breathing for a few minutes longer, as the warmth of her sank into him. He felt the exhaustion he always felt like he was barely outrunning catch up to him again, but here he was willing to let it overtake him.
Maybe I should wake her up? I mean... alien strength... don’t want to get crushed if she has a weird dream or something. Probably the smart thing to do, he thought.
“Zontar-ha peq lor-yuur’vyn...”  Starfire murmured in her sleep and readjusted herself against him again, her body curving around him. 
Eh. There are worse ways to go, he thought as he closed his eyes.
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