#it’s another one of those things of “it’s probably what the writers intended but I like mine better”

[cryptvokeeper]

In my time honored tradition of “I like rise Leo but in a slightly to the left way of the general fanon interpretation” I propose: yes, Leo was being a bad leader and not communicating with his team during the movie because he didn’t want the responsibility of being leader HOWEVER he was not purposely self-sabotaging in an effort to get Raph to take leadership back. Instead, he was going solo and not working with anyone in order to avoid leadership altogether and not make calls and decisions that could potentially fail.

[iwritefandomimagines]

NOT MY FIRST RODEO — COOPER HOWARD/THE GHOUL

masterlist

part two | part three [coming soon]

pairing: cooper howard/the ghoul x reader, mentions of john hancock x reader hehe

description: the tension between you and cooper had been palpable for ages, and he was beginning to struggle to deny his attachment to you — despite his reluctance. he’s certain you’d never really be interested in him like that, until he finds out he’s not the first ghoul to enjoy your company.

warnings: swearing, jealous!coop, sexual references/implied smut, angst, making out, mentions of drug taking

author’s note: writers block was POOF! gone the minute i rewatched fallout last week & restarted fallout 4. hancock will always be my bf so i couldn’t help myself from mentioning him. let me know if u want a part two with actual smut! i only left it out because i don’t really usually write smut on this blog haha.

—

Cooper Howard and John Hancock were by no means what you’d call friends.

However, as much as it pained him to admit it, the former knew that the latter was — by the standards of many — a good man who’d do the right thing to help others when needed.

That was why, however begrudgingly, he’d suggested that you spend the last few hours of today’s daylight making the short trip to Goodneighbor to stay ‘for a while’.

It was clear that an intense few days, hunting a difficult son of a bitch of a bounty, had very much tested your limits.

He told himself that, given the amount of caps that said son of a bitch had earned you, you could afford a couple of days laying low in Goodneighbor before picking up another job.

Well there was that and the fact that much to his dismay, in the short time you’d been accompanying him on the road he’d found himself irritatingly attached to you.

When he’d first stumbled upon you while collecting a bounty you’d failed to deliver on yourself, you’d enthusiastically offered your companionship and he’d fervently denied it.

You knew he doubted you’d be any use based on your circumstances when you met, but despite your reassurances that it was just because he was the notorious fucking ghoul that everyone went on about and he had simply beaten you to it, he dismissed you with a “not a chance, sweetheart,” and went on his way.

But when he kept bumping into you in the following days, he’d given in and afforded you the luxury of helping him out on this one job — allowing himself the comfort of the excuse that if he really needed, he could trade you for caps and say goodbye to the pretty girl so oddly desperate to be at his side.

You’d driven him crazy at first — full of questions and curiosity, never refraining from voicing what was on your mind.

The way you watched him so carefully, all doe-eyed and attentive, had initially just pissed him off. But in the weeks that followed this had mellowed, and he’d found himself almost grateful to have someone so comfortable around him.

He’d never admit that though.

You’d just been much more skilled in combat than he had expected. That’s why he told himself he kept you around.

He totally just figured that it couldn’t hurt to have someone close by who can handle themselves and is willing to take just a tiny stake of a bounty (on your part, you figured there was no need to take more — he basically spent his share with you anyway).

You, on the other hand, didn’t want to admit that you had been lonely and desperate and missing the life you’d previously been so comfortable in when Cooper walked — well, stormed, into your life.

He might not ever have intended to (in fact — if he’d known, he’d probably never have let you get so close) but upon gradually letting you into his life he’d nestled his way into the empty little nook left behind in your heart.

“Why did you hesitate when I said Goodneighbor?”

Oh yeah, there was that.

When you’d left Goodneighbor all those months ago, you’d left with a broken heart and a head full of hazy memories of the happiness that the place had once brought you.

“I didn’t hesitate.”

“You sure as shit did, and even you know you’re a damn bad liar,” the Ghoul scoffed, pausing his pacing and turning to look you in the eye, “What does a pretty little thing like you know about Goodneighbor?”

You folded your arms over your chest, shaking your head at him as his steely eyes bore into yours, “Nothing. Just odd you’re suddenly so eager to go hide away somewhere when you’ve called me all sorts’a names any time I’ve asked for even a short rest break.”

“You’re full’a shit,” his hand flew instinctively to the shotgun at his hip before he released a deep sigh and relaxed it, “So I’m gonna ask you one more time. What do you know about Goodneighbor?”

You pondered for a moment whether or not to keep lying to him — he didn’t know much of your full past beyond the fact that you’d been a vault dweller a long time ago and been fighting for a living since.

You’d settled briefly in a number of places, though, and he’d heard too many stories about times you’d left settlements for various reasons to believe that you’d be too scared to return anywhere with him at your side.

Especially not somewhere like Goodneighbor.

“I—was living there for a while,” you shrugged, avoiding his gaze again now, “Didn’t like it.”

The Ghoul laughed humourlessly at that, “C’mon sweetheart, you’re going to have to do better than that.”

“I didn’t feel—look there’s just someone I don’t really want to see round there, okay?” your eyes didn’t leave the floor as he took a step closer to you, heavy breaths almost taunting further information from you.

“And who might that be?”

You looked up at him for just a second before eyeing the dust below your feet again, “I was, well, I lived there quite a while. I was—seeing, well, romantically— uh, there was—,”

“Spit it out, sunshine.”

Sunshine.

You’d not been called that since the day you left Goodneighbor the last time, and you cursed yourself for physically recoiling at the sound of it.

“Well I’ll be fuckin’ damned. You got a thing for ghouls, huh?” the wicked grin on his face set your stomach alight with a combination of emotions, “Didn’t peg a pretty little thing like you as the type. That why you spent so long beggin’ me to take you with me? Little vaultie princess desperate for another ghoul to defile her?”

You were crimson red now.

You didn’t know how to react, startled by the fact that he knew who you meant based upon your reaction to the term.

Hancock had always been charismatic and flirtatious though — it was no wonder Cooper had heard him use the phrase before.

You were almost angry, immensely embarrassed and yet, at the same time, a little aroused by even his insinuation that he knew that you wanted him in that way.

You’d found him attractive almost immediately and yeah, maybe he was right and you did seem to have a thing for ghouls.

But you sure as hell weren’t going to let him stand there and make you feel embarrassed right now.

“That’s not it, it’s not some kind of—like—,”

“Hancock got bored of ya and you latched onto the next irradiated motherfucker you came across?” he spat, “Bet you regret it now you know that I sure as shit ain’t nothin’ like your precious old mayor.”

Somewhere in the harshness of his tone you were sure you could detect a hint of jealousy at the root of his mocking.

You sighed defeatedly, “I wasn’t looking for some kind of fucking replacement when I met you, if that’s what you’re insinuating. I just— you just— well— Whatever, it’s hardly like you’ve made any suggestion you’d want me if I made a move on you anyway.”

His eyes seemed impossibly dark now, narrowed on you as his finger reached up to tilt your chin upwards towards him, “Is that right, sweetheart?”

Your legs were like jelly beneath you, a jolt of lightning in your veins at his touch.

“Sure, you flirt with me, but you’re so damn up ‘n’ down sometimes that I don’t know if it means anything,” you shrugged, skin tingling as his fingers lingered beneath your chin, “If I was lookin’ to replace John, it would’ve taken more than you being a ghoul for that.”

If he still had eyebrows, they’d have been raised now, his eyes rolling, “Right, nobody comes close to Mr. Righteous Mayor.”

His breath fanned over your face, his eyes returning to stare into yours as if looking for a reaction he knew you wouldn’t want to give him.

But you were all riled up now — so he was going to get one.

“What, is this a pity party? You want me to tell you he’s not all that? That I’m better off now I’ve found you? Oh Coop… I want you, I need you, you’re better than him. Only ghoul for me,” you mocked, pressing your hand to your forehead in feigned fawning before snapping back to seriousness, as he watched you frustratedly.

“Like I said, you weren’t a replacement. I wanted company and somewhere along the way I’ve been fuckin’ stupid enough to like your company more than I should,” you huffed, “You don’t have to pretend you want more than this flirty-but-I-hate-you-a-little arrangement ‘cos you’re jealous knowing I’ve had much, much more than that with someone else— and another ghoul at that.”

A growl left his throat at your words, his hand meeting your waist and pushing you forward so that your back was pressed against the wall.

“You’re playin’ a dangerous game here, sweetheart,” he warned, “And it’s one you won’t win.”

Your head fell back in frustration and met the wall with a small thud as his other hand pressed firmly against the wall beside it.

“You think I feel inadequate or something?” he snarled, and for a moment you weren’t sure if the question was rhetorical.

“How the fuck should I know? It’s hardly like you let me know how you’re feeling ever,” you sighed, your mind growing increasingly cloudy at your close proximity and his hand still on your waist, “That’s all I meant about John. It’s nice to know someone wants you… Hell, it’s even nice to be told when they don’t no more just as long as you’re being told.”

He was baring his teeth in a snarl still, but his lips began curling back up into a smirk, “You think I don’t want ya? Think I haven’t thought about it when you’re at my side like a fuckin’ dog on a leash looking at me all doe eyed an’ fuckable?”

Your cheeks couldn’t have been more flushed, and you knew he could feel the way your thighs clenched together at his words.

“Then why haven’t you done anything about it?” your response was a breathy whisper, the hairs on your neck pricking up and your heart thumping hard against your ribcage.

“Oh that’s a whole can of worms you don’t want opened, sweetheart,” he licked his lips, “Sweet little thing like you shouldn’t be with someone like me. But looks like I ain’t gotta worry about that, huh? Hancock’s already spoiled ya.”

You broke his intense gaze for a moment, eyes finding the floor as your teeth grazed your lips shyly at the weight of his words.

You couldn’t help the feeling that swelled in your chest at the lingering jealousy, and hearing him talk about wanting you as badly as you’d wanted him all this time gave you the confidence to push it.

“Oh he spoiled me good, you’re right,” you shrugged antagonistically, trying to quell the pain that still sat in your chest — albeit pain that took up much less space now that you’d found Cooper.

He scoffed, “That’s fightin’ talk for someone who don’t wanna see him again, darlin’.”

“Yeah well, he made me the happiest I’d been in the Wasteland since I left the vault and then tossed me aside ‘cause he got it in his head that I didn’t actually wanna be with him, like I must’ve been using him for his power and couldn’t really love him ‘cause he’s a fuckin’ ghoul — as if I didn’t know that when we met,” you grunted, “That’s all the fuckin’ chems for ya.”

Cooper leaned in closer to you now, “Well he’s a fuckin’ bigger idiot than I already thought he was, giving up you when he had ya all to himself like that.”

“Figure he doesn’t care. Might as well be married to Goodneighbor anyway.”

There was silence between you for a moment, nothing but heaved breaths and heavy eye contact as you pieced together what to do next.

You watched Cooper’s eyes flicker down to your lips for a moment, and could almost see the conflict behind them as he battled the urge to kiss you.

“I don’t wanna see him, but I don’t still want him, if that’s what’s stopping you,” you gulped, “In case it’s not loud and clear, I want you. Just didn’t wanna see him without any confirmation you aren’t gonna rock up there and declare me as some kinda fuckin’ pet and humiliate me even more than he did.”

“Enough talk about him,” Cooper growled, one hand pulling your face to his by the jaw, “If he don’t realise what he’s missin’, I definitely fuckin’ do.”

Finally, he kissed you.

Your hands flew around his neck, lips meeting his with equal fiery passion and pure need.

His one hand still remained cupping your jaw, whilst the other explored the waistband of your trousers earnestly, thumbing at your hipbone.

Finally, after all of these weeks of pining and sexual tension, Cooper Howard was giving you exactly what you needed — and all thoughts of John Hancock melted away.

You found yourself pulling him as close as physically possible, allowing him to press you against the wall as he stole your breath with the intensity of the kiss.

“Mightn’t be your first rodeo, sugar,” his lips pressed just behind your ear as he spoke, “But I’m sure as shit gonna make it feel like it is.”

———

eeeee please lmk if you’d like a part two with smut. or just a part two where they eventually go to goodneighbor. please feel free to request more coop or some hancock, and be warned there are more coop x hancock’s gf/ex!reader fics in the drafts because i can’t stop myself!!!!

in the meantime — here’s my masterlist.

[theboombutton]

Ok so Alex was the main writer for this casement, and obviously he knew we would latch on to incidental characters that seem a lot like Jon and Martin.

The questions I have are: first, whether it was a prank on TMA fans; and second, if it's not a prank, what he intended to convey by including them. Alex doesn't seem like the kind of guy to leave jmart fan service for its own sake; if those are truly alternate Jon and Martin, I suspect they're there for a story or setting reason.

Was it a prank?

I'm inclined to answer no. Darrien didn't just describe them, he wondered aloud while recounting his story if what happened to him also happened to them. That's not out of the question for prank red-string-bait, but the more you harp on incidental characters that seem like Jon and Martin, the more plausible it becomes that they are. People red-stringing over things that the author draws a circle around and writes "look at this!" next to isn't funny - it's just analysis.

Prank is still on the table, but it's not my preferred explanation.

If they are alternate Jon & Martin, what does their presence here imply?

One thing it probably implies is that we're dealing with more than one alternate universe here.

So far we've only had evidence of two: the Protocolverse, and Celia's home universe. We're reasonably sure that Celia's home universe is the Archiverse, because the character voiced by Lowri in TMA only took the name Celia after she lost her memories in the Eyepocalypse. And if Darrien comes from a universe where Martin worked reception at a therapist's office and Jon was a client, then he didn't come from the Archiverse. He came through from another, until-now-unknown-to-us universe.

Wild speculation ahead

Turn back now if you only want thoughts that are well-evidenced

There's also another possibility we could stack on top of the implication of a third universe. This is primarily supported by Doylist reasoning, rather than in-universe evidence.

Alex wrote ?Jon and ?Martin in close proximity to Darrien's universe shift. He brought attention to the fact that Darrien didn't recognize either of them - ?Martin being a new hire, and ?Jon being a new-enough face to be worth pondering. This would imply it was fairly likely ?Jon and ?Martin's first meeting - likely even their first time being in a room together. And Alex, through Darrien, further invited us to wonder if ?Jon and ?Martin had been pulled across universes as well.

Is it possible that the universe shift happened because of Therapyverse's Jon and Martin being in close proximity at the time?

Jon and Martin are apparently cosmically important in at least the Protocolverse, given that they manifested as two of FR3-D1's voices. What if something in the Protocolverse is pulling in Jons and Martins from other universes? It might be easier or more efficient to find or to pull them when they cross paths, and Darrien just got schlurped up with them this time.

Who would be interested in collecting alternate Jons and Martins? I can think of a few possibilities:

The Fears. They've got Jon and Martin reading case files, maybe they need more Jon & Martin to make FR3-D1 go.

The OIAR. Lena said some entities are benevolent, most aren't, and they're trying to maintain a balance. If Jon and Martin are their "benevolent entities," then maybe they think pulling additional copies into their universe's fear-space strengthens them. Maybe they're even right.

The Magnus Institute itself. It was still around at the time of Darrien's shift, given that the case is from the Institute's files. Jonah Magnus may have figured out (or found out) that Jon and Martin had something to do with his ascension in another universe, and started abducting alternate versions of them as part of his research.

Maybe Chester and Norris started talking a year ago because someone or something finally pulled enough Jons and Martins (and J2s?) into an extradimensional JMalgamation to give them the necessary power.

Maybe Darrien got spat out practically starved to death because he couldn't feed on fear, nor were there versions of himself that could that he could amalgamate with.

And who the fuck is the second J?

[tremendum]

okay hear me out…… a javi fic based on the song bad idea by girl in red…..

bad idea

pairing: javier peña x fem!reader

rating: explicit. (18+. mdni.)   word count: 5.7k   requested: yes, based on the song bad idea! by girl in red as above as well as "can we have a javi p x fem!reader fic with a size kink PLLLSSSSS you'll fucking body that!!!" summary:  "bottom line, now you're stuck at this sticky bar, nursing your whiskey ginger because there's only one other person here you know; and he is a bad idea. and he's walking over to you." warnings: probably the worst spanish ever (pls correct me!), tbh this is porn with feelings, established friendship, this ended up pretty fluffy, soft dom!javi, reader has a very loose job description, drinking, smoking, size kink, praise, minor self-doubt/insecurity from both, oral (f!receiving), smut (unprotected PiV), spitting, slight face riding, multiple orgasms. notes: cant BELIEVE this is my first javi fic??? bc ive been loving this request for a while and this finally came to me amidst a fever, ive written it in like just over an hour and a half and refuse to edit it. anyways, desperate Javi is so sexy to i had to throw it in there,,, please lmk if you enjoy it and leave a comment/reblog!! that's how writers are motivated!! :) lmk if you guys want more javi in the future bc hes soooo yummy

masterlist

★  

it's as if the universe is calling on you to make bad decisions tonight. 

you didn't intend on going to the bar and staying until last call - that notion had only just appeared to you around four-forty-five pm, when you were signing what was to likely be only halfway through the documents you had to sort and approve by today's deadline. or maybe it'd slipped into your head when Murphy and Peña strutted into their desks just across from yours in the bullpen, smirks on their faces and their words hushed. 

you'd caught Javier's eye just as he laughed at something Steve muttered, his brows raising tauntingly as he glanced from his empty desk to your cluttered one. his shirt was unbuttoned and tie loosened, much too casual for the work day that'd yet to end; you'd rolled your eyes and resisted the urge for a cigarette. or the urge to climb over those desks and onto his lap right then and there. 

so you'd told yourself as a reward for the overtime you'll be punching in this week, you'll grab a few drinks - maybe, maybe find someone pretty to go home with. it's been a few months since anything delicious came your way, and after your tortuous new reassignment to the west side of the office, you've been forced to stare at Javier Peña for close to forty hours a week while he furrows his brow, churning cigarettes and barking things on the phone. 

it was a bad idea to let yourself find him attractive, and an even worse decision to become friendly - because once it started, it was an downhill sprint towards full-blown feelings. 

he didn't make it easier, with his looks and his comments and how he walked you to your car every evening or invited you to drinks with him, Murphy and Connie every Friday.

Javi was trouble. so, here you were. 

but fate is not on your side - it was simply a bad idea to come to this bar. 

it's not like you didn't expect to see him here, either. Javi always frequents this bar, all DEA agents do - and you'd actually told him and Murphy this time that you'd planned your night around this exact barstool. another poor plan, because now you're stuck staring at Javier's chiseled profile as he smiles at the woman working the bar, sliding his empty glass across to her and running a hand over his jaw. 

yes, you'd all but invited Javi to join you this evening, but you hadn't expected him to come alone - something about Connie and Murphy going to buy flowers on the way home - whatever. bottom line, now you're stuck at this sticky bar, nursing your whiskey ginger and poking at the ice with your cocktail straw because there's only one other person here you know; and he is a bad idea. 

and he's walking over to you.

"what's got you so down, cariño?" his voice is smooth as silk - but something deeper, almost. barrel-aged, probably. you regret the smile that placates your expression when he pulls himself into the stool on your left, turning your body to face him slightly. he's smiling already - that fucking smile, damn him. 

your head feels fuzzy as the smell of his cologne, muddled from the sweat of the day and the drink he'd enjoyed in the hour before deciding to come over to your side of the bar. you sigh, "trying to decide if I can walk home from here." you joke with a shrug, huffing a laugh through your nostrils as you cross your legs together. 

your skirt always used to feel odd against the stools here - the juxtaposition of work attire in a dive like this sticking out like a sore thumb. but you're used to it, now, and it barely phases you that your work shirt is unbuttoned just a bit more than it'd been at work this evening. 

Javi tuts gently, "should've considered that before last call." he mutters, raising his brows as he slides a cigarette between two plush lips, searching around his tight jeans for a light. your lips curl in a half-smile as you flick your own lighter, leaning forward to light it for him; his eyes, dark and swimming.

"guess so, but I've been prone to making bad decisions lately." you sigh, shrugging a shoulder. 

he hums lowly as a puff of smoke plumes around your bodies, gently caressing you. his arms, exposed to the elbow by the carefree sleeve-rolling Javi did the moment he left the embassy, glow golden under the low light. "Leavitt." he mutters in recognition, and something within you blooms and sputters. you nod sheepishly - Leavitt had reamed you in the middle of the bullpen early this morning for incorrectly guessing on some of his paperwork and resulting him in a fine. 

you wish Javi hadn't heard, but- well, it'd been hard not to hear. 

you smile weakly, shrugging as you desperately try to chase the cherry at the bottom of your glass, not sure what to say. your eyes meet his when you finally fish the cherry up and bring it to your lips; the sweet flesh of the fruit breaks open and the juice slides over your lips and onto your tongue as you sigh. 

his eyes follow you just as they've followed your figure around the office for months; dark, unspoken, wanting. screaming something at you, as you lift one brow towards his dark gaze. 

"among other things," you sigh, tongue slipping out to gather the syrupy juice on your bottom lip, "yes." 

Javi shrugs, "fuck him." he mutters it simply, fingers tapping lightly on the wood grain of the bar between you, and you crack a smile, "yeah, fuck him." 

you swallow your last sip before humming, "so where's Murphy? didn't realize this'd be a party of two." 

he tilts his head, "is that such a bad thing?" 

you huff a short laugh, cheeks heating up as he stares down at you, eyes dipping low to the lowest button of your shirt before meeting your gaze. "I never said that, did I Javi?" you smile sweetly, balancing your head on your hand, leaning on your elbow. but you know better; this is a bad thing, you realize. 

because the second Javi leans closer, you catch the woodsy musk and cigarettes that swirl around him, a deep amber scent. you're totally fucked. 

there's something that's been dancing between the two of you for weeks now, too exciting and different and real to acknowledge yet; but now, with three drinks under your belt and his large eyes on you, you don't think you can resist. 

you don't want to. 

but something catches your eye behind his attentive frame, and you try to hide a laugh. "your admirer is staring." you smirk, eyes distracted by the woman tending bar who keeps glancing with a stare at the back of Javi's head.

he doesn't even turn his head, seemingly already knowing who you're talking about. 

he shakes his head, "she's an old friend." he dismisses, eyes not leaving yours. you raise a brow, "friend?" you scoff lightheartedly - you know him, you know his reputation. 

he smiles, "yes, a friend." he insists, though his pink cheeks suggest otherwise, and you laugh. 

"it's been months since I've been with someone." you sigh, almost embarrassed to be admitting that to someone with such... high credentials in that arena. you honestly don't even know why you admitted it.

he doesn't seem phased, but his eyes seem to grow a shade darker as he flickers them back to you. 

"why don't you change that?" he says with almost no hesitation.  

you shake your head, "because I don't have a ride home." you tease, looking at him through your lashes. 

his head tilts towards you microscopically, eyes flickering over your features in a way that has your thighs clenching together. "let's go." he decides, ghost of a grin falling on his lips as he moves to stand. you blink, setting the glass with a clink down on the bar, "you don't have to, Javi, I can-" 

he waves you off with a dismissive hand, shaking his head as if offended, "I'm not leaving you here, cariño." he smiles gently, offering a hand to help you off your stool. something warm turns in your stomach as you take his hand - this is such a bad idea yet you can't help but dive in head-first. 

he insists on walking you to your door. 

you'd think it chivalrous, but with the way his hand falls on the small of your back, you're beginning to think it's anything but. 

he leans against the wall just next to your door as you dig through your purse for your keys, cheeks hot under the scrutiny of his gaze. by the time you slide the key into the lock and open the door, he's standing just a foot away from you, hands in his pockets and an easy look on his face under the flickering fluorescent lights in the hall. you turn back, heart hammering, as he speaks. 

"have a good night, cariño." he says with a gentle smile, about to turn around; you feel your opportunity slip through your fingers like the grains of time as you stutter, "w-wait!" 

he can't hide the smirk as he turns back to you and you bite your lip, tilting your head inside, "Javi..." you murmur softly, embarrassed to even say it.

his brows raise in question, intrigue spreading over his face, but he says nothing.

in your impatience, you flush, sighing. "don't make me say it." you almost whine. 

at your words, he takes a step towards you, your head tilting up to follow his eyes until he's directly in front of you.

there's a playful kind of desire that flickers through his features as he watches you're heaving breaths. his breath hits you warm and inviting as his glistening eyes search yours, "say it." 

your throat dries as you take a breath, "please," you try instead, face heating in embarrassment. he shakes his head, one large hand rising to caress over your jaw, brushing a strand of hair back from your ear.

leaning into your ear, he whispers gently, "you can do better than that, can't you hermosa?" his voice rolls over your body, inciting goosebumps to travel the length of your skin. 

you let out a stuttering breath, your whole body buzzing in anticipation as your eyes roll over the doors of your neighbors, hoping none of them can see the way this man crowds around you right now, how desperate you are as your hand slides over his own forearm. "Javi, I want you," you whisper, biting your lip. 

the groan he lets out sends a rush of heat to your core; arousal slicks your underwear as you feel lips ghost over the junction of your neck and shoulder; "estoy seguro de que sí, niña bonita," he breathes against your hot skin, his hands grabbing your hip and hair, pushing you suddenly against the wall. 

you gasp, a short whimper escaping your throat as his teeth scrape over your pressure point, one hand sliding into his hair, tugging at the thick locks. "fuck," you whimper as he presses fully against you, the pressure of his hardening cock against your stomach, "Javi-" 

you mutter, hands frantically pulling him by the collar of his shirt towards your awaiting, desperate lips- 

he tastes warmer than you'd imagined. like bourbon, some sort of sweet - licorice? - and desire as he licks into your mouth fervently, hand roaming down your sides to splay over your ass. you gasp against his mouth once his large hand squeezes your ass; seizing the opportunity, his teeth bite gently on your bottom lip. he leaves you breathless and dizzy. 

yes, this was - this was a bad idea. 

"look at you, hermosa." he mutters as he pulls away, hand splaying over your cheek and turning your head slightly, his eyes coursing over your aching body, searching his friction. something flickers in his eyes as he watches your hips move desperately, his hands squeezing over your waist, "so pretty." 

you flush at his words, the adoration lacing his face as he takes in your mussed hair, stuttering chest. 

"inside-" you start to suggest, breathless with desire, and he nods eagerly, "yes-" and then you're stumbling inside your apartment, a rush of cologne hitting your nose pleasantly as he crowds behind you, hands on your back, sliding low until he's squeezing your ass and groaning into your ear, "drive me fuckin' crazy with these skirts, baby." 

you let out a moan when he's pushed you back against the wall, hands pulling to untuck your blouse from your skirt, lips trailing marks up and down the column of your neck. you scramble to help him undo your top, but he get's too impatient- 

the buttons pop and clatter onto the ground as he rips the blouse open, exposing your lacy white bra; your eyes round as you gasp, "Peña!" you snap, swatting him on his shoulder as he laughs sheepishly, staring at his own mess then back to you.

"I'm sorry." he utters, trying desperately to conceal his smirk as you glare at him, trying to calm your thundering heart because Javier Peña wanted you so bad he just ripped open your blouse. 

he sighs, pulling at your hips until you give in, melting against him, "I'm sorry, cariño, I'll buy you another." he sounds a little more sincere this time as his lips press against your neck again and you help him shuck off the shell of what remains; his hands mould against your breasts instantly, thumb brushing against the bud that peeks through the lace, hardened in arousal. "you're so pretty, baby, it hurts." he mutters, cheeks tinted as he leans in to kiss you again, a warm feeling coursing through you as he slowly undoes your bra. he's always been so dramatic. 

you smile to yourself as you watch him lean down, placing kisses down your chest. 

your stomach coils in desire as he hitches one of your thighs up against his hip, hand sliding down to the strap of your heels; you silently thank yourself for wearing your decent heels - sexy, but professional. his eyes eat you as his fingers slowly undo the buckle on the heel, dropping it to the floor while staring into your eyes.

your heart hammers as he drops your leg in favor of the other, slowly dragging his fingers down your legs to unclasp the other; as you fall down to your true height, he has to stoop over you to catch your lips to his, your teeth scraping as he groans into your lips. your hands hungrily shove his suit jacket off his broad shoulders, tongue pressing against his as he pushes you hard back against the wall. 

you moan gently as he grabs your thigh and hitches it once again against his hip, pressing his length up against your core; the friction is delicious against your aching clit, dull but stimulating. you try to cover it up, "you better buy me two blouses, Javi." you joke. he smirks into your mouth, hand sliding below your skirt to toy with the ends of your stockings.

biting down on your throat as he snaps the stocking against the plush skin of your thighs, he groans, "fuck it- I'll buy you anything you want, just let me taste this pussy." he adds, voice low as he reaches around, fumbling with the zipper on your skirt. 

oh, god.

you help him with frantic hands; soon he's down on his knees, hands sliding up your thighs, clad in your stockings and panties, his breath hitting your heat gently. 

one hand rises up your abdomen to toy with your breast, pinching and rolling your nipple as he hums. you sigh shakily as you stare at him, body electric with arousal.

his eyes are blown wide as he stares up at you, tie loose, shirt unbuttoned and disheveled, hair mussed up from your fingers - the picture of an angel. your heart nearly stops as he leans forward, eyes still on you, and kisses just below your navel. 

your heart pounds as you stand on shaky legs, watching with anticipation as Javi teases you, kissing just around where you want him: your thighs, down to your knees, back up- your waistline - as his lips flutter onto your skin, you have to close your eyes, trying to find your breath because your mouth is screaming at you to say something that could ruin this all.

(yeah, this was a bad idea). 

but he slowly pulls at the edges of your underwear, you're aware of how hot everything is: you're sweaty, in need of a shower eventually. biting your lip, you mutter, "should- do you want me to shower, first? it was so hot out today-" 

any self-doubts that had crossed your mind are thrown out your open window into the night's warm breeze when Javier looks up at you with a face almost offended; as if it were absurd to ask. his hands close possessively over the backs of your thighs as he growls. 

he shakes his head, hands tightening on you so you stay against the wall, "you're not going anywhere. I've been dreaming of this pussy for ages. I'd live here between your legs, hermosa." he mutters, pressing his nose up against your panties, moaning at the damp seat, "so sé buena para mi y deja que te pruebe, si?" 

swallowing dry as your face heats, you nod, fingers brushing hair from his eyes. "si, Javi." 

he nods, "good." 

his thumb rises to prod gently at your pussy, sliding over the damp fabric as you gasp sharply. he lets out a low hum just as his thumb slides to hook your panties to the side, revealing your glistening, aching cunt for him. you watch with a slack jaw as his tongue darts out; a bold, flat stripe up your heat sends shivers through your body, your throat letting out a quick gasp at the desire that rocks through your body. 

"fuck, princesa, you taste so good." he groans, a desperation laced into his voice that you've never heard from him; one more lick spreading your arousal before he's swirling his tongue around your clit, holding your hips down hard into the wall to ensure you can't move away as he groans into you. 

"feels so good, Javi-" you whimper, face hot as he hums, face moving between your thighs as you stand on shaky legs. "what was that?" he teases, biting your thigh softly. you yelp, hands falling to grip his hair, your head falling back against the wall. "sh-shut up," you breathe, grinning with hot cheeks as he chuckles against your heat. 

but then he pulls your panties down your legs, tossing them behind him before he settles back between your thighs; suddenly one of his thumbs is spreading you open more, forcing your legs to spread just slightly, and he's spitting onto your wet heat.

your toes curl in pleasure as you gasp, one hand grasping your breast, thumbing your nipple. your stomach clenches as he leans back into you and works, tongue spreading over your cunt and gathering your arousal from your aching entrance before pulling your clit into his mouth, grazing it with his teeth and sending shocks through you. 

he groans when you tug on his hair; the vibrations from his throat sending a thrill up your spine and you can't help as your hips buck forward, smothering Javi's face and nudging your clit against the ridge of his nose. 

"s-sorry," you mutter, face flushing as he pulls back and stares at you hungrily; he shakes his head, "fuck, do it again." he orders, lips falling back onto you, tongue coursing through your soaked cunt as you buck your hips, the feeling of your clit against the bridge of his nose pulling a sharp gasp from you. 

your words fail you as Javi squeezes your ass, slapping you harshly and causing you to yelp. your hips don't cease their movements; riding his face, the nudge of his nose on your bundle of nerves hurtles you towards the edge of your orgasm, and you start to moan his name louder and louder. 

his mouth works to wind you up, your legs twitching and hands grasping at yourself and at his shoulders, his hair. he eats you up like he's been starved for months, his mouth only leaving you to mutter words into your dripping pussy. it's mere minutes before you're writhing against the wall and Javi leans back, "I can feel you're close, hermosa," he breathes, thumb replacing his tongue as he speaks. your thighs start to close but he holds them open, blinking those large eyes up at you, "need to feel you cum on my tongue, baby. cum." he sounds more desperate than you've imagined even in your wildest of dreams and you nod, your stomach burning with the clench of nearing your orgasm. 

you hit your high merely seconds after his mouth falls back onto you - your fingers in his hair, his name from your lips, chest heaving and back arching off the wall. he moans heavy into you as he laps you up, drinking you in and coaxing you through your orgasm with gentle hands and a silver tongue. 

you're left breathless when he stands back up, your legs as weak as jelly as his hand pulls your jaw forward and into him.

your lips meet his in a sticky, passionate kiss; you can taste yourself on his tongue as you pull his hips against yours, his cock straining through his pants. 

"do you need a minute-" he pulls back to ask as your hands slowly slither down to fumble with his belt; your heart thrums as your body rides the high of your orgasm, but all you want is more, more. 

you don't think you'll ever stop wanting more of Javier Peña. 

this was a really bad idea. 

"-I can get you water-" he tries to offer and your heart thumps at how kind he is, so attentive and caring - but you shake your head, nipping at his lips as you push him backwards, further into the apartment, "no- need you now, Javi, please." you mutter, "water after." you insist, unable to fight the smile that grows as he chuckles against your lips. 

"okay, señorita, whatever you say." he whispers, leaning slightly until he's picked you up and you wrap your legs around his hips, bare, sensitive cunt against the rough denim of his jeans. "but I don't want to hear any complaining, now." he teases, eyes sharp and shining with a playfulness that has you smirking. 

"then you better give me what I want." you counter as he stumbles his way through the threshold of your bedroom, hand coming to the back of your head to make sure he doesn't bump you against the frame. 

"I'll give you anything if you ask nicely." he whispers into your ear, biting your earlobe as you both tumble down onto your mattress, desperately clawing at his shirt and tugging his jeans off until he's splayed above you, arms caging you in as your stocking-clad legs wrap around his naked hips. 

he pushes up, leaning back so he's got his cock in his hand, pumping slowly as he stares at your bare body, splayed out for him. his eyes look ravenous; slowly, he lets his cock rub up your slit, gathering all of your arousal and juices as he rolls his hips.

you hitch your breath, both of your sighs heavenly as they flow through the evening air. there's sweat sheened over his built chest and your fingers slide over his toned arms, lifting yourself slightly so you can look- 

oh, fuck. 

your eyes almost roll back at the sight of his swollen cock, thick and large and lying against the short hairs that curl just above your pussy; he's so big, splayed on your stomach - he's going to be so deep.

your eyes widen as you wonder briefly how he'll fit but then he's humming, "ready, princesa?" 

you nod desperately, clawing at him until he's caged you once again, the tip of him prodding your entrance gently. "yes, Javi. fuck me, please." 

he hums, "dirty mouth," he mutters, "for such a sweet girl." he kisses you just so, his hand brushing hair away from your forehead as he teases you. 

you’re breathless; shivers cascade down your spine at the press of him, slowly breaching your hole and grinding sloooow and smooth into your dripping cunt, aching with desire.

he can’t slide into you, not fully- his cock is too thick, your cunt dripping but still so goddamn tight. the moan he lets out as he inches in slowly is fucking heavenly. "fuck, cariño, you weren't lying-" he mutters, almost shaking with restraint as he slowly eases himself into your tight walls, "-shit, so tight."

you grip his shoulder tight, "t-told you- it's been months," you gasp and he smirks, "thought that was just a line to get me back to your place," he mutters.

as he stills himself, nostrils flaring with focus, you lay a hand over his cheek - his eyes meet yours, something deep and truthful hidden in them. your eyes scream back at him. 

oh, you're fucked for him. this may have been a horrible idea. 

"well maybe I was just waiting for the right person," you speak before you can think- he freezes, you can feel his muscles tense. your mind reels. fuck, you hadn't even talked about what this was between the two of you- a quick fuck, stress relief, or something more- you're fucked. 

but he smiles, suddenly, groaning through squeezed eyes as he shakes his head, "you're going to kill me, cariño." he mutters, one hand falling to your hip, "you're so fucking cute." 

your stomach rolls with butterflies at his words and you hide your face. he has none of that, though, and peels one hand from your face and kisses you sweetly.

the kiss heats quickly as you slide your tongue against his; a strangled gasp leaves your lips when he starts to slide into you more, inch-by-inch, stretching you open and filling you full of him. his head falls heavy against your chest as he mutters, “you're tight, baby, so fucking perfect.”

his voice is starting to slur in pleasure as he soon slides into you fully, sheathed deep. you flutter around him as you accommodate to his size, the feeling of him nearly melting you as he starts to slowly thrust. his hips roll and grind against your clit; you gasp, nails raking down his bare back and pulling a moan from his lips. 

you let out a loud moan, his thickness stretching you and sliding deeper than expected, the tip of his cock kissing against a spot that has you keening. your toes curl and your head falls back as he grinds into you slow, deep.

it's a feeling you've never felt before; you knew Javi had a... reputation, all the women talk about it at your girl's nights and at the water cooler. but you never imagined such bliss as his hands roam you, palming your tits, his lips tracing shapes of affirmation all over your face, chest, hairline.

his voice slips between english and spanish as he purrs praise after praise in your ear- dreamed of you for ages, baby... just like that, yes, take my cock... querida, so good for me...

all you can say is his name; it falls from your lips like it’s the only word you know, his hips soon pistoning into you with fervor, chasing the feeling which coils again in your abdomen. 

suddenly he's grabbing at your hips, lifting you slightly as his legs slide under you and you're flipped up, straddling him, sitting on his cock as your legs wrap around his back.

you feel one of his own sturdy thighs prop up behind you as he lets you gather your breath; a whimper of his name has him nipping at your bottom lip. 

"shh, querida I know, feels so deep, doesn't it?" he mutters, kissing your lips as you slowly start to rock your hips, bouncing slightly as Javier's hands roam up your spine, one squeezing your ass as the other tugs your hair. 

"fuck," you moan, "you're so big, Javi-" he groans at your words, his own hips thrusting upwards and hitting a spot inside you that has you screaming; he leans back, staring up at you as you stare down at him with lust-filled eyes. his hand falls to lay against your stomach and your eyes follow his, where you can see the slight movements of him deep inside you- 

christ. 

you moan at the sight, the thought - he's so big all the way inside you - he's tugging you closer to him, until you're chest to chest, lips pressing hard against the other. 

the sounds of you and Javi's bodies together echo through your apartment; your head lulls to the ceiling as you let out a languid moan, the spot he's hitting making your eyes roll back. you can feel your cheeks hot and heavy as you whimper in desire; you're so goddamn close again, you know he can feel it. 

"shit-" he groans, "y'close?" he mutters and you nod frantically, the pleasure coiling dangerously fast. 

"been months, hermosa?" he groans into your ear as he meets you halfway with his thrusts, your breath punched from you with every kiss to your g-spot, "this what you wanted, hm? this feel good?" 

he’s always had you wrapped around his finger, and he fucking knows it. 

you sigh in ecstasy, unable to form full sentences as he hits the delicious spot inside you that nearly makes you pass out: "yes, J-Javi- so good, so good-"  your hands hold him as close as possible, his warm chest against yours.

the crest of your orgasm tingles your thighs, your toes curling and legs shaking as you start to stutter; he moans heavy- he's close, too. his thrusts are getting slower, sloppier. his movements are soon desperate and deep as yours are; his tip kisses your cervix and your body jolts up with each movement of his pubic bone against yours.

"you're perfect- fuck, need you to cum, baby-" he starts, desperate as one hand holds your neck, the other on your ass, tight enough to leave marks. "cum on my cock, hazlo ahora mismo mi amor, please-" 

he's rushing, desperate as you moan, his words throttling you hard towards the edge. 

you see colors when you hit your high. your orgasm explodes as you flutter around him, pulsing, moaning, your body shuddering as you slow your movements on his lap, unraveling around his touch. your voice is broken, mutters and whimpers of his name drifting through the room.

your thighs are soaked with your own spend and your cunt grips him like a vice; he can't help but kiss your open mouth as he milks you through your orgasm, muttering soft grunts in your ear. "that's it, baby. there y'go, so pretty, querida." he kisses the column of your throat as his thrusts slow to deep, long thrusts. "atta girl." 

his slow thrusts are splintered by his voice, "sh-shit, 'm gonna cum." he sounds almost desperate, his body so close to yours it's almost like he's trying to smother you. he groans your name in a broken sound; his grip tugging your hair. as he lifts you slightly, pulling out just in time for him to paint you with his cum. 

his seed covers your lower stomach, his groans deep and breaths quick as he moans, brows furrowed. your heart slams at the sight; Javi, pushing you down onto the mattress as he pumps his release onto your chest. 

his head tilts back, a look of complete bliss on his face, brows tight as his abdomen muscles tense and flex. his arms, toned in the soft light of your bedroom, glow. christ.

okay, not a bad idea. a fucking dream.

he slumps onto you after a second, moving so that he doesn't crush your chest, pulling you tight against his own hot skin. you feel his smile grow against your neck and the butterflies that grow in your chest swirl out of control. 

you smile, too.

you catch your breaths in silence while he places kisses sweetly over the marks he made earlier, your hand smoothing down his back, to the curve of his ass, and back up. 

once his breath is back, he kisses your cheek and stands, stretching his bare body, unashamed of the open window across the room.

you smile, face hot as he smirks at you, his eyes raking over the cum that paints your skin, before walking towards the kitchen. you sigh, lighting a cigarette that you dig from his jeans as he comes back into the room to wipe you clean, handing you a glass of water. 

you smile at that, shaking your head as you hold the cigarette up to his lips, watching as the ember lights up the dark of his mustache and the light in his eyes. there's smile lines around those eyes; it makes your stomach flip.

once you've both drained the glass of water, he pulls you back down to his chest, relaxing against the mattress. 

"well, that was probably the worst decision you made all day, hermosa."

his voice is teasing, but there's a flicker of doubt that crosses his eyes that you know all too well. your heart flips as you shake your head gently, hands cupping his cheeks. 

"this was the best idea I've had in weeks, Javi." you smile softly, pecking his lips gently. 

when you pull away, his smile is so soft you almost want to photograph it. something in the air is sweet when the two of you silently realize that he's going to stay the night; he pulls you up into his chest, kissing your hair while you listen to his racing heart.

he doesn't say anything after that - he doesn't have to. 

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:

taglist and requests for javi are open.

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[antispopausandstuff]

you guys know the s5 scene where catra left adora to die?

here's another thing i noticed.

she's apologizing for dying. while it's really fucked up, it is within adora's character to apologize for something she couldn't control. i can't recall, but she did something similar to glimmer and bow a few minutes prior to this.

however, while the writers may not have intended for this, adora is also apologizing for this:

now, you might be drawing a blank at how this is correlated to her apology, until you remember what exactly catra and adora were talking about here:

adora is about to die.

originally, the conversation was about adora somehow choosing shadow weaver over catra ( which did not happen ), but when catra wasn't winning the argument, she shifted it to be about adora practically being led to her death.

catra's wording starts out as her acknowledging that adora doesn't have a choice in this ( which goes against her earlier reaction to just crying and running away from her when she gets the failsafe ), but then it changes its tune and becomes an accusation of choosing this path, when adora has been forced to take this.

basically, adora is apologizing to catra in the finale as if to prove that catra was right, even though she's literally dying right in front of her.

and catra never apologizes for leaving her.

speaking of which, would this apology even work on catra?

because we all know the real reason she left.

she left because somehow, someway, she twisted the entire conversation and everything related to shadow weaver as adora actively wanting to be around their abusive mother, despite showing multiple cases to catra herself that she doesn't.

adora doesn't like being around shadow weaver. she doesn't like her at all. she may not want the woman to suffer harshly, adora did heal her when she was sick, but she doesn't want to be around shadow weaver if she doesn't have to be.

and catra knows that. there's several instances throughout the show that she's smart enough to see and understand that. she even uses a torture method sw used on her previously on adora and swift wind in the previous season, because she knew it would severely hurt her. especially since catra, for whatever reason, put the electrocution on steroids.

so, it's not like catra has been blind to adora's distaste, she just chooses when to acknowledge it.

catra sees adora eventually dying as 1. choosing to die and 2. choosing shadow weaver over her, in this current scene.

adora has no idea catra thinks this way, so her apology for just dying is not only really fucked up, but is most likely entirely pointless.

these two don't see the same problem. at least, not the exact same one. catra may still be pissed off at adora daring to "choose" the universe over death, for daring to choose the lives of literally everyone on the motherfucking planet over herself, but she's still more upset at adora "choosing" their mother over her.

so, what is adora apologizing for exactly?

yes, for dying, but how does catra see it? knowing catra, the best case scenario is she probably sees it as adora apologizing for being "wrong" ( because she says "no matter what happens, i am staying with you", but then gaslights adora into staying ), and for choosing their mom over her, even though neither of those are true or correlated within the context.

this level of thinking is on par with stans, so i'm not surprised catra herself acts this way.

it sure did hurt my brain when i realized it, though.

[wingedblooms]

How do you interpret "A thing of secret, lovely beauty" in the bonus chapter? The first time azriel used it to describe the necklace. But the second time it was used to describe gwyn's happy smile.

Hello there! I feel like this is a trap. But as I’ve discussed before, readers interpret this differently and that’s wonderful. Interpretations can also evolve over time after rereads and new information. Mine has mostly remained the same (except for some specifics surrounding the second usage 😆). Part of my interpretation drifts into theory. As a reminder, theories are predictions of what might happen based on patterns of evidence in the text. No theory is guaranteed and it’s important to read any new books in the series with that in mind.

That said, Sarah is a fairly predictable and repetitive writer, so I try to pay close attention to her patterns. Many of my theories are based upon those patterns. For example, one of the most apparent patterns is that fate comes in threes. There are three faces of the Mother. Three sacred sister peaks that are barren and thrumming with power. Three stars that shine above Ramiel, the heart of the Night Court, each spring. Three blessed sisters who have been marked by fate and Made fae. Three winged males who found each other and are drawn to the three blessed sisters. There’s more evidence, but I think you get the idea. It can be helpful to use patterns to interpret and predict what Sarah has planned (e.g., the first and second sister have had their stories told, so it would follow that the third is next; there is also strong evidence that what she contributes to the narrative is needed next).

You’re probably wondering how this relates to my interpretation of the phrase secret, lovely beauty. Before I connect it to another clear pattern, I want to put it in proper context. When we first see the phrase, it is used to describe the necklace Azriel gifts to Elain. The setting in which this occurs is romantic: faelights dimming to cast little pools of gold amid the deep shadow of the longest night of the year. Put plainly, this is Sarah setting the mood. 😂 Azriel, who feels lonely despite the company of his shadows, finds himself suddenly moving into the foyer and there she is:

The Faelights gilded Elain’s unbound hair, making her glow like the sun at dawn.

On the longest night of the year, Elain glows golden like the sun at dawn. Like a pool of gold amid the deep shadow. This description follows a pattern in their imagery together, and it is lovely.

Their interaction is also raw and vulnerable, and therefore distinct in this bonus. When they come together, Azriel allows himself to feel and those feelings run deep enough to question his people’s traditions later on. Unlike every other interaction in this bonus, he doesn’t feel the need to put on a show for Elain (i.e., a cold mask, fake smile, or lying repeatedly to avoid emotional topics). In other words, he is himself with Elain. They share a quiet understanding and powerful attraction.

Now that we have this context in mind, we can move onto the the necklace and its chaos-inducing phrase:

The golden necklace seemed ordinary—its chain unremarkable, the amulet tiny enough that it could be dismissed as an everyday charm. It was a small, flat rose fashioned of stained glass, designed so that when held to the light, the true depth of colors would become visible.

A thing of secret, lovely beauty.

“It’s beautiful,” she whispered, lifting it from the box. The golden faelight shone through the little glass facets, setting the charm glowing with hues of red and pink and white. Azriel let his shadows whisk away the box as she said softly, “Put it on me?”

Notice something interesting here? Both Elain and the necklace glow with their true depth of color—golden and rosy, like the dawn—when faelight shines upon them. Dawn is when first light appears (pun definitely intended) and the world reawakens. Elain is linked to the rose amulet, and that follows a pattern of imagery she has already established in the text. This is the pattern I mean:

“I painted flowers for Elain on her drawer,” I said, sawing and sawing. “Little roses and begonias and irises.” (acomaf)

She was a rose bloom in a mud field. Filled with galloping horses. (acowar)

Even in the middle of winter, she was a bloom of color and sunshine. (acofas)

She plucked another figurine from the mantel: a rose carved from a dark sort of wood. She held it in her palm, its solid weight surprising, and traced a finger over one of the petals. “He made this one for Elain. Since it was winter and she missed the flowers.” (acosf)

Her gaze shifted to the carved wooden rose she’d placed upon the mantel, half-hidden in the shadows beside a figurine of a supple-bodied female, her upraised arms clasping a full moon between them. Some sort of primal goddess—perhaps even the Mother herself. Nesta hadn’t let herself dwell on why she’d felt the need to set the rose there. Why she hadn’t just thrown it in a drawer. (acosf)

This gift not only reinforces the pattern, but it also holds a secret message that has become central to Elain’s arc: the rose (like Elain) has hidden depths. The Feysand bonus echoes this theme. Elain’s outburst stunned her family and Rhys suggests there is more to her than they’ve seen thus far.

“I think she’s kind, and I’ll take kindness over nastiness any day. But I also think we haven’t yet seen all she has to offer.” A corner of his mouth tugged upward. “Don’t forget that gardening often results in something pretty, but it involves getting one’s hands dirty along the way.” (Feysand)

Feysand then agree to help Elain after Nesta, which is Sarah’s way of reinforcing the other pattern she put in place (fate comes in threes—first Feyre, then Nesta, and now Elain).

With Elain’s character arc in mind (and the fact that she herself has suggested she doesn’t feel seen), Azriel’s gift is actually incredibly insightful. He gave her something that says, I do see you, and he knew she’d be able to appreciate its meaning. Even the words that describe her gift—secret, lovely beauty—refer to specific things we learn about Elain in the text.

Secret: Feyre compares Elain’s ability to learn and keep secrets to Azriel’s own secrecy (one of many parallels). She is a seer, after all. What other secrets might she know and keep hidden from others?

Before Feyre could reply, Azriel said, “What about Mor?”

Feyre smiled. “Elain was the only one who guessed. She caught me vomiting two mornings in a row.” She nodded toward Azriel. “I think she’s got you beat for secret-keeping.” (acosf)

Lovely beauty: We learn from Nesta that their mother predicted Elain would marry for love and beauty, which I think @juusworld5728 observed sounds a lot like lovely beauty:

My Nesta. Elain shall wed for love and beauty, but you, my cunning little queen…You shall wed for conquest. (acosf)

This last phrase, love and beauty, is connected to the rose Papa Archeron carved for Elain. It is a symbol of love and beauty and goodness in the world, and for such a simple carving, it has unexpected weight just like the rose amulet has unexpected depth (Sarah hit this theme hard).

Her father had died for her, with love in his heart, and Nesta held love in her own heart as she pulled the small, carved rose from her pocket and set it upon the gravestone. A permanent marker of the beauty and good he’d tried to bring into the world. (acosf)

Why does this little rose matter? It is also linked to Wyrd. In acosf, Nesta felt the need to place Elain’s rose next to a figurine of what we now know is farseeing and benevolent Wyrd. Wyrd, the higher force of the universe, found Elain so lovely that she gifted her such powers and purrs like a kitten in her presence. They even share the same blooming imagery. Over time, Wyrd became known as a goddess (probably because she uses female forms as vessels, if I had to guess based on the evidence), but she is in fact a force, a mother to all, a cauldron brimming with creation. Now, where have we heard those terms before?

Gwyn huffed a soft laugh. “In part. We honor the Mother, and the Cauldron, and the Forces That Be. We have a service at dawn and at dusk, and on every holy day.” (acosf)

Gwyn’s words nearly echo the Under-King’s in hosab and hofas. The priestesses worship Wyrd. Let’s look at the description of their worship:

The music was pure, ancient, by turns whispering and bold, one moment like a tendril of mist, the next like a gilded ray of light. It finished, and Merrill spoke about the Mother and the Cauldron and the land and sun and water. She spoke of blessings and dreams and hope. Of mercy and love and growth. (acosf)

Elain’s strength lies in finding beauty even in dark chapters. She is a rose bloom in a mud field—the embodiment of blessings and dreams and hope and mercy and love and growth. The priestesses, including Gwyn, honor that benevolent force and seek to bring it into the world with their services. They are the voice of the Cauldron. And in this world, we know like calls to like. Now that we’ve read hofas, it’s highly likely that the ancient, spell-like music the priestesses perform is ancient summoning magic, which is magnified by the properties of the cavern (ahem, witch glass) in which they sing. So, is it a surprise that Azriel had every intention to return Elain’s rose amulet, a symbol of love and beauty, and found himself at the library during their worship of such things instead? No, it actually makes a lot of sense.

Azriel expressed no forethought in giving the necklace to Clotho for Gwyn. He did not select it for her and did not intend it to be a romantic gesture, which is why he tells Clotho to give it to Gwyn or any other priestess who might appreciate it. The setting and interactions in this part of the bonus are not described romantically because they are not intended to be romantic.

Clotho, who is observant like Elain, can see the shadowsinger’s sadness despite his deflection and offers him comfort in a dark moment:

Clotho’s pen moved once more. She deserves something as beautiful as this. I thank you for the joy it shall bring to her.

Her words spark hope in him and for whatever reason, he is able to picture Gwyn’s eyes lighting upon the rose amulet in his mind. The vision is a thing of secret, lovely beauty.

Some interpret this moment, a vision of Gwyn described as a thing of secret, lovely beauty, as an indication of Sarah shifting romantic pairings. I think this interpretation falls short of the full context, especially since days (in acosf) and months later (in hofas), Azriel is still upset and refuses to even discuss the topic of mates.

Rather, I think that—like the sister caverns, which are linked in song and dreaming—Elain and the priestesses (especially Gwyn) are also connected. They are part of the solution to the problem that was introduced in the first half of this bonus as well as the overarching plot. Like @silverdreamscapes, @silverlinedeyes, @offtorivendell, @willowmeres, and others I’m sure, I believe Elain—a seer chosen by Wyrd—will work with the priestesses that worship her (the most logical partnership in the series, when you think about their respective powers). It wouldn’t surprise me if a dawn service, especially if it involves groundings, helps Elain push the limitations of her powers like the dusk service did for Nesta.

I also agree with many (notably @silverlinedeyes and @merymoonbeam) who think Gwyn’s voice holds magic and, depending on what we learn, relates to being a lightsinger. That is likely the hidden depth (a thing of secret, lovely beauty) that was hinted at in the image since her eyes light upon Elain’s rose amulet. I believe @silverdreamscapes and @silverlinedeyes have suggested her voice, which summons and pierces during the dusk service, could clear mist and shadow in a vision if needed. I also think it is interesting that Gwyn is the first to sever the Valkyrie ribbon, a string tied not to a rib, but a post. Perhaps she and the priestesses could help Elain sever an unwanted bond and weave a different fate for herself, one that binds her to someone she loves? That would be the most epic end to the near-constant arguments over ships.

[incorrect-mtg]

A Note for a Friend

It was after the third nightmare of the night, where her mind once again conjured images of her friends being torn apart by phyrexian horrors, that Kaya decided she wasn't getting any more sleep. Putting on some warm clothes and sturdy boots, she let Ravnica's streets embrace her.

There was never a time when the city was actually silent – the cover of darkness meant simply a change in the type of business and clientele operating at any given time – but Ravnica right before dawn had a certain... calmness that let her wander, going wherever her feet took her. It didn't come as a surprise, however, that they ended up bringing her to a place in particular. A place that she kept coming back to, with a frequency that wasn't quite obsession but neither was it entirely healthy. The wall of a currently closed inn. The Traveler's Noticeboard.

What had once been a magically-warded bulletin board, always filled with notes but nevertheless big enough to fit one more, was now an impromptu memorial wall, a place for all planeswalkers that had witnessed and survived the phyrexian invasion to put their hopes and sorrows.

She let her eyes wander among the notes, taking it all in. One message, signed only with a rune she could not identify, assured their intended reader that its writer was ok and would be staying in Ravnica for the forseeable future. A pattern repeated all over the noticeboard.

But for every message like that, there were three or four with a more desperate tone. One, its writing rushed and barely readable, begged for a "T" to please reach out if they were ok. Another mentioned that a funeral would be held in Kamigawa for an "M".

And then there were the messages left outside the noticeboard itself. In the wake of losing their spark and realizing they were now on the other side of the wards, so many walkers had turned to placing things just outside of it, using memory to sidestep magical protections.

Of course there were more of the same messages as before, but they are accompanied by a new type: planeswalkers stuck away from their home, asking (sometimes begging) someone able to reach out to their family and friends beyond the blind eternities to tell them they're ok.

But overwhelming in their numbers are the mourning letters. Farewells that could never be shared, epitaths of those lost in the fight, drawings and paitings, some flowers she knows are magically protected because they have been blooming for months. In this section, she'd left a message of her own.

She focuses, looking for her own handwriting, and her heart skips a beat when she can't find it... before she forces herself to calm down. It would not do to give herself hope when the message could have simply been blown away by the wind, rather than reach its intended reader.

So she pulls pen and paper out of her pockets and writes a replacement before affixing it to the wall:

J, L said you "don't fail." I want to believe that. If you read this, reach out. If you can't, just replace this with a message of your own. You know where I keep watch. -K

That done, she turns to leave, the first rays of sunlight just starting to hit her and the note-covered wall behind her. She knows she is a fool to maintain any hope, that her note probably did not reach its target, but she still walks back to her home with a spring in her step.

[writergeekrhw]

I just want to offer an alternative take on Kira’s behaviours being queer coded (Is it the short hair? The anger? I don’t know what people mean tbh, sounds… stereotypical and rude to queer women tbh), I never got those vibes as a young person watching her, never would have occurred to me at the time. I’m not judging I just have a very different view the character let me explain.

What I did get from her was that she was young and female and religious and angry and she was ALLOWED to be all those things. And I was ALL those things too, and it meant, and still does mean, the world to me that she was like that but ALSO competent and respected and loveable even though she was so, so angry, frustrated, and DONE at the injustice in her life. I (also some close friends) was going though some dark times myself when I was young, and Kira was a beacon of hope. And as she grew in her character arcs, and faced her own prejudices from Marritza to everything else, to me that was saying you can do it. If Kira can do it, can look her shitty past in the eye and say I will break this cycle and do better and unlearn and grow, you can do it too. Back to dark stuff and queer coding - I’ve seen people blast Kira getting more “feminine” (again, what? The hair? Softer personality? She learned to be gracious, is that so bad? Angry redhead stereotypes aren’t great) over time as bad and anti-queer, but to this young person it was… sometimes young women go through things at the hands of oppressors and making yourself unappealing and masculine is a choice for safety. Men don’t want ugly. So seeing her grow past that too, seemed like a culmination of her safety and maybe by extension bajor’s as metaphor.

Maybe this is a stupid interpretation but I did not see kira queer, I saw her as a hurt person who was allowed to heal and that gave me hope. I’m sorry if this is not what you intended but Kira kinda saved me from giving up and I want to thank you (and all involved) for her. Sorry this isn’t super well organized thoughts. I really am grateful for all of ds9. It was a very good show.

Without getting too deep into critical theory and Writer Intention vs. Viewer Interpretation, this is also a perfectly valid interpretation of Kira's character and it's yet another lens through which we saw her/wrote her, probably even the dominant one (and the one I suspect Nana drew most from for her performances).

Which is not to invalidate people who saw her as queer/repressed or people who saw her as a colonized woman wrestling with her ambivalence about her new, arguably more benevolent colonizers, or people who saw her as a person of faith struggling to see past her religious prejudices, or people who saw her as a terrorist trying to overcome her past sins.

Over 172 episodes, multiple writers wrote her thinking about different things. Sometimes the very same writers would draw from different inspirations from episode to episode or scene to scene or even line of dialogue to line of dialogue. And of course, Nana and the various directors would bring their own takes to every moment.

All of which, IMHO, helped make her a terrific character.

Also thank you for the kind words and I'm glad we helped! LLAP.

[fandangotales]

500 Followers Event, figured I would do it right out the gate so I didn't forget lol. Also, be aware this is lengthy and I am so sorry for it.

How do you think the characters (Jean, Ningguang, and Sara) would react to a reader who listens to crime and history stories while playing, in particular crime cases such as Jack the Ripper, history stories such as the South Sea bubble and the Depression, and war stories such as the American Civil war or stories from the world wars?

How would Jean react to hearing about the devil of Whitechapel who paralyzed London and was never caught? What would she think of a world where monsters like Jack roam while her god is defenseless.

How would Ningguang react to the first financial crash in history...and the fact that so many people actually fell for it?

How would she feel knowing about just how often our world has financial crashes and just how many troublers it has with currency, and more importantly how would she feel knowing that such times could engulf the world while her God calls it home?

How would Sara react to the bloody and horrible nature of our conflicts, because while Inazuma's civil war may have been bad, I feel that it utterly pales in comparison to the sheer devastation and madness that was America staining itself red.

How would the ever loyal general feel knowing just how devastating and horrific the wars of our world can be, and just how plentiful they are? How would she feel knowing that her creator could be caught in one such conflict with none of them there to protect them?

I intend to do something like this where the Acolytes get tormented with gruesome facts and stories by a child reader who is a history buff and decides to tell them some of the tales about our world...and promptly gives all of them nightmares in the process lol.

I hope to get on the idea...sometime this or next year because I have a few other projects I am working on and I know just how badly I tend to procrastinate.

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this ask, if you don't want to do it that is okay. Here is hoping I did everything right in regards to the rules in regards to this ask, but regardless have a great day and stay safe.

If you do end up writing that, I’d love to be tagged so that I can read it. Also, please don’t worry about your ask being troublesome, I’m honored to be getting an ask from one of my favorite SAGAU writers! Keep up the good work on your writing, I always love reading your posts! <3

Honestly, considering the way Teyvat works in regards to safety, and wars… I think it’s fair to say that many, if not all of the people there would be shocked by what life is like on Earth.

For example, if you decided to go out on an adventure by yourself, the worst you’d have to worry about would be hilichurls, considering that you aren’t going anywhere particularly dangerous.

On Earth, that simply wouldn’t work because there are a lot of bad people, and bad things that could happen to you if you were simply out on a walk at night. Especially if you weren’t in the company of another person.

If Jean heard about people who’ve done horrible things like murdering multiple people for… “The fun of it?”.

I can imagine her being repulsed, and incredibly concerned for your safety.

You may be the literal God of Teyvat, but would that stop anyone from randomly deciding to murder you, “for the fun of it?”

You might hear this idle voice line more often than the others:

“I do hope the Knights of Favonius are all working hard…”

She wants to tell you to take precautions against those with hostile intentions, to make sure you aren’t out to late… if only the code didn’t restrict her from voicing her thoughts.

For now she’d have to settle with reminding you of how safe Mondstadt was. With the Knights of Favonius, you would be safe.

With her, you’d always be safe.

Just… please be careful, alright?

The first time Ningguang heard about how terribly this world deals with money, she’d probably laugh.

“Oh, how amusing.” She’d chuckle, before realizing that it was your reality, instead of just a poorly made joke.

The idea of multiple currencies seems especially stranger to her, since Teyvat only uses Mora. (Disregarding the use primogems, which is only for you.)

One day, however, as you were talking while playing Genshin, she heard you bring up something called “inflation”.

You then proceeded to complain about how food prices where getting ridiculously expensive, and how your “fridge” had literally no food in it.

Ningguang seemed to freeze, being brought back to her early days as a child.

She had been through similar struggles, but knowing that her God is going through financial issues?

That her God is suffering because of the undeserving world in which they reside?

Preposterous.

“There were over 60 million casualties from World War 2…”

The voice droned on, as another daily commission was completed.

Sara’s face blanched, taking in the numbers.

60 million.

That was well over the number of citizens living in the entirety of Inazuma.

“The war was notable for the Nazi-sponsored genocide of the Jewish people…”

Genocide of people?

Why?

Her hands shook around her bow, as you guided her to shoot a hilichurl, directly in the head.

Sara heard you sigh, as the monotone voice was silenced.

Your divine voice spoke over the background music of the game.

“Third war I’ve had to research this week, interesting, huh?”

This was… considered an everyday occurrence for you?

Another shot, the hilichurl faded to dust.

You lived in a world where wars like that frequently happened-

She steeled herself, finding resolve as she struggled to keep shooting the hilichurls.

Sara would find a way to bring you to Teyvat, where you wouldn’t be in any danger, ever again.

[uptoolateart]

The Miraculous Child

So, in 'Representation', Felix talks refers to ‘the miraculous boy’ a couple times. He also calls Adrien’s conception ‘a miracle’, meaning Adrien too is ‘miraculous’.

The second I heard this, it hit me that the title of the show has had this extra meaning from day one. If we look right back to the start of the series, it has been a story about children and adults, especially parents, some a little overbearing (like Tom) and some neglectful or downright abusive.

The message I take away is - life, bringing a child into the world, is a miracle. Science tells us how it works, but the fact that it works is almost like magic. Yet, there are people out there who fail to see this and don't value the gift they've been granted.

There will be people reading this and thinking, ‘Yeah? So what about Chloe?’

I hear you.

Audrey is a terrible person, and Andre is no better. When he hauls her off at the end of ‘Revolution’ and says he needs to correct his mistakes, he just sends her away with her mother. He’s washing his hands of ‘a problem’, just like he’s done with everything else, e.g. when he resigned as mayor. He walked away from responsibilities, after creating a mess for the people who voted him into office. Likewise, he walked away from his responsibilities as a father.

Does that excuse Chloe's behaviour towards others, especially Marinette? No. Does it explain it? Yes.

So, let's talk about choice, which has been mentioned several times in the series. Chloe has a choice to become just like one of her parents...or to become something better.

Because, if you think about it, at some point in time, Audrey and Andre and even Gabriel were all children. And children aren't just born nasty. They learn nastiness as they grow up. To become who they are today, they had to have started out in a similar position to Chloe, for example. They represent the potential future for their children.

If we saw them as kids, we'd probably see them being mistreated by the adults in their lives and we'd all sympathise with them and hope for their redemption. But we're seeing them as adults and our instinct is to say oh well, too late, they're just awful people. In fact, they could redeem themselves at any point, as demonstrated by Nathalie's turnaround in Season 5. It's just that, the more awful things you've done, the more you have to atone for. Gabriel would have to do a lot - maybe even have a brain change - to be redeemed. But you see my point.

So, at the end of 'Revolution', we see Chloe at a crossroads. She's on that plane, annihilated by her mother, and hiding by herself in a corner. She browses her contacts and hovers over Sabrina's entry...and her face crumples like her heart is breaking with regrets. Oh, it’s sad.

But she passes over Sabrina and moves onto Marinette. She makes one last attempt to bring her down. It’s an act of desperation – redirecting her own suffering onto another, trying to keep control over things when she’s completely out of control of her own life.

Marinette finally puts her in her place, and we see Chloe fall apart in a real way - for the first time ever. I don't know about you, but I found that very uncomfortable viewing. It was a relief to see Marinette stand up for herself, and it needed to happen...but Chloe's despair was also painful. I think all of those were emotions were intended.

Let’s set Thomas aside here. I don't want to get into debates about what was said on Twitter. He’s not the only writer for the show, anyway. I am just speaking about my personal perception of that scene. Chloe gained heaps of sympathy, after she’d been appalling all season, which was pretty powerful.

The fact is…Chloe needed to be put in her place. But that doesn’t mean she deserved everything she went through. Even so...sometimes these moments are necessary and revelatory. They can be the catalyst for great change.

What I mean is – if you're in denial about your position, redirecting your pain onto others, sometimes you need that wakeup call. You need to hit rock bottom in order to start climbing back up into the light. So, when Chloe fell apart, it was painful...but I also saw it as her potential turning point. As long as she maintained her delusions to escape into at school, it was impossible for her to transform - because she refused to see that there was any change needed. But when you have nothing left…that’s when you might begin rebuilding yourself.

Every episode in Season 5 has had multiple meanings. Looking at 'Revolution', when Chloe was akumatised, she trapped her victims in a maze, going round in endless circles (revolutions). Notably a lot of them were adults.

I think if this had happened early on in Season 4, Adrien would have been trapped morosely in that loop with the others. We saw this kind of thing in 'Guiltrip'. So, it spoke volumes about his growth as a character when he was the first one to seek a way out of Chloe's maze. He immediately used his cataclysm and broke a hole, escaping and letting everyone else out. Metaphorically, what he did was break the cycle. If we think about cycles of abuse, this is what the next generation always has the chance to do - to revolt against the past.

it's interesting, then, that when we got to 'Representation', we saw Cat Noir completely lose it with his father. He needed to let it all out...but he was in danger of going too far...and deep down, he knew it. His worst nightmare was of losing all control, to the point of letting his rage destroy everything he loved. Unconsciously, he's well aware that he runs the risk of becoming like his father. However, his complete breakdown, begging his father to take his miraculous to make it all stop, tells us he won't become like his father - because his conscience is too strong. He wants to break that cycle.

Felix has also done some bad things - but he's begun the journey of redeeming himself and changing. He too is trying to break out of that cycle so he doesn't become like his father.

Kagami is embracing her passionate side, rejecting the coldness and isolation her mother has attempted to breed into her, no doubt due to her own upbringing once upon a time.

And I think there’s definite potential for Chloe to do the same. There’s no reason for anyone to remain caught in these patterns. The trick is to recognise the pattern is there in the first place - because you can’t break free of something if you don’t know you’re imprisoned. At the end of Revolution, I think Chloe finally saw her prison, saw that she was already trapped in her own maze, going round in circles. Now it’s up to her to pull an Adrien and cataclysm the bars that hold her in.

Because like Felix said, over and over – each child is miraculous simply for existing. And miracles should be cherished.

PLEASE NO POST-REPRESENTATION SPOILERS IN COMMENTS :)

[returquoise]

ATLALA, aka Avatar the Last Airbender Live Action

Sooooo, I finished the first season and had thoughts (just like everyone else lol). First context, non-spoilery thoughts, and then spoilers under the cut, yadda-yadda.

Why context? Because for a lot of people OG ATLA was their childhood, and they have super strong feelings about it and about any adaptation that exists. I'm not one of those people.

The first time I watched OG ATLA I was over 20 years old, which means I was an adult and had adult viewpoints about the story – worldbuilding, character writing, etc. It was never the hallowed most perfect show ever for me. It was and still is a fucking good show with some amazing writing and worldbuilding but I did have some gripes.

So when ATLALA was announced I remained neutral – I've seen the movie that shall not be named and din't really like it but shitty adaptations have always existed. When we started getting photos and trailers and news pieces, I was feeling pretty positive about the visuals, but neither news pieces or trailers actually tell you shit about what the writing or worldbuilding is like. However, I was about 70% optimistic.

Because what indications I did get about visuals, writing etc, were very reminiscent of another adaptation that had come out recently, about a series that was actually a bit more important to me on an emotional than ATLA. I'm talking about One Piece, and OPLA which came out last August. I've been a fan of that for 10 years longer than ATLA, and while they did a lot of changes, the spirit of the story was there.

So I copied my optimism and good feelings from that, going into ATLALA.

Now, the thoughts.

Visuals are pretty good. There are moments when I can tell they left some visuals out due to trickiness/budget (the "is Zuko's ship real?" review after the premiere). Some things look fake or plasticy, some stuff is too clean. Bending looks a lot better than in the movie that shall not be named.

Writing has issues. Some of it is very expositiony which makes it wooden and the shots uninteresting (there were so many badly framed shots with characters just awkwardly standing and talking). There are some lovely bits of dialogue that gave me feelings, but those moments were in the minority. And some writing choices were also quite childish, even for an adaptation of a kids' cartoon, so I'm a bit confused about the intended age demographic – except there are some really violent bits in there, which leave me even more confused.

Pacing was either frantic or okay-ish. The writers clearly had trouble paring down the OG series, and then ended up cramming stuff together. I could keep up with it (knowing what certain characters roughly meant for the plot, even if they were at a different place and time), but I'm not quite sure if someone uninitiated in the OG series could. The last 2 episodes had probably the best pacing and even then there were some things that made me go "hmmm."

Some actors have issues emoting – main and extras. I agree that the Gaang has lost some of their flaws compared to the OG series. Maybe some of them will make more of an appearance in season two when everyone's more experienced at acting? Especially considering that they'll likely have stuff more spaced out there – there are some episodes I'm pretty sure they'll outright skip, just based on the choices in this season. But we'll see. There were some fun and interesting bonding moments between different characters.

Sokka, Zuko, and Suki were the standouts from the younger cast. Suki is considerably different from the OG but it was acted and written well, and is an interesting choice. Sokka's quips, while not as numerous as in the OG, were fun. Physical comedy is obviously more toned down because real bodies can't do the same shit as cartoons. More about his arc choices later. Zuko was a bit toned down from the OG but IMO also the closest to it. And as someone who's almost finished with a Zuko AU fanfic, I was positively cackling due to the fact that some of the choices made for the character are similar to something I've done in my fic.

As for the rest of the main kids, there'll be more in the spoiler bits, BUT, they're different, and feel less experienced in acting. They're not bad but some choices were definitely different than in the show and they offer interesting opportunities. We'll see how they pan out, but be prepared for some speculation from me.

Fight scenes sometimes had IMO slow moments in the choreo, and they could have been better. Some were excellent, some a bit ehhh.

On the whole, I think this is about 7 out of 10. Some moments were 8 out of 10. It's a passable adaptation

Spoilery thoughts waaaay down.

Whoo boy. Where to start here?

Let's start with the cramming. As far as I can tell from my notes, the episodes are roughly divided like so:

EP1: 3,5 and bits (Boy in the Iceberg, Avatar Returns, Southern Air Temple, half of the Storm, bits of Avatar and the Fire Lord)

EP2: 1 and bits (Warriors of Kyoshi, part of Waterbending Scroll)

EP3: 3 halves (King of Omashu, Jet, Northern Air Temple)

EP4: 1, 4 halves and bits (King of Omashu, Jet, Northern Air Temple, Cave of Two Lovers, half of Winter Solstice P1, bits of the Avatar Day,)

EP5: 2 halves and pieces of 3 (half of Winter Solstice P1, half of Bato of the Water Tribe, part of Southern Raiders, part of the Library, part of Siege of the North) AND timeskip mention of the Great Divide and the pirates from Waterbending Scroll

EP6: 2, two halves and bits (Winter Solstice P2, Blue Spirit, half of Bato of the Water Tribe half of the Storm, part of Siege of the North)

EP7: 2 (Waterbending Master, Siege of the North)

EP8: 2 and pieces (Siege of the North, Return to Omashu, bits of Northern Air Temple, part of the Library)

Waterbending Scroll is a bit of throughline because you see moments of training in pretty much all of the episodes.

Episode 1 was very full, and felt rushed at times. There were a few places where they could have shortened some parts (like the earthbender spy scene at the start) to give more time for other stuff. Biggest gripes are the convenience of timing – Aang going off to clear his head only for everyone to die that very night. HOWEVER, me and my friends talked about it being likely Spirit shenanigans going "fuck, Air Nomads are gonna die now, we need to deepfreeze the Avatar for storage." We also concluded that the sudden current of Sokka and Katara finding Aang was either physics we don't understand, or Spirit shenanigans. Also the thing about all the Air Nomads coming over for the Great Comet festival? And then having so few of them on screen? Sorry, but I ain't buying it. Having such a sparse population in one temple I could have bought (with caveats) but adding in the gathering, nah.

Episode 2, Sokka-Suki was beautiful. I think it works even with the removed downplaying of girls capabilities (this change also brought some other stuff to Sokka I absolutely adored in later episodes but I'll talk about that when I start ranting about the characters). This was pretty close to the OG episode in many ways and I really don't have other problems with it, besides the somewhat childish end discussion about hope and shit with Aang and Suki's mom (Suki having a badass mom is fun). Manifesting Avatars and being able to talk to them only at their shrines will be an interesting take on stuff. Because that will affect some stuff on later seasons and I'm not sure how.

(And considering how scared Aang is of the Avatar State this early on, we might end up skipping the Avatar State in the next season. At least partially. Because we did get a lot of info now.)

That's a very full itinerary and it was hardest to follow at eps 3-4 because there were so many things going on. Jet's and the Mechanist's conflicting storylines made for an interesting drama (though, again, hard to follow) and gave Sokka and Katara something to do – which they didn't really have in the OG Omashu episode, which was what Aang was mostly dealing with here. In my opinion these two episodes didn't get a proper handling, because they're one of the few instances were we get people from the Earth Kingdom doing questionable shit, but we don't really discuss it. And while everyone know marketing is a mistake (it makes no one happy), considering that this series was trying to sell itself as a more mature take, that feeling is left kinda lacking in regards to Jet and the Mechanist. I do appreciate Bumi being fucking bitter, like Yass, you go king, as well as the bit with the Earth Kingdom soldiers speaking of grief and mistreating Iroh. That complexity is what was left lacking with Jet and the Mechanist, and how Katara and Sokka dealt with that emotionally. Also loved Zuko getting hit by a broom and Iroh taking the fall for him. The Zuko-Zhao alliance was an interesting angle to take (after messing it up pfft) and establishing early that Azula is a master infiltrator? I liked that move, also the fact that there are Fire Nation rebels. Although I fucking loved the quick fake marriage.

5 and 6, despite being about as full if not fuller, were weaven together really well in my opinion. My biggest gripe with that two episode storyline was how the Fire Sage Shyu-Aang team-up was done – not that it was any better in the OG to be fair but it is more jarring in live action. I just about died at the 41st twist because holy shit that's an amazing angst take and I appreciate it so much. And while we do get Aang planting an acorn, it feels like a really small moment and I think the Hei Bai issue should have got a bit more attention as the episode was resolved. Koh was fucking terrifying and the appearance of Wan Shi Tong – and in the last two episodes the appearance of the celestial objects calendar machine, as well as the fact that Zhao got his dirt on Tui and La from a Fire Sage – leads me to believe we won't be getting the Library episode next season.

(The only way I can see Return to Omashu happening is if it's remixed with Imprisoned which was totally left out of this season, or we get the important info aka neutral Jing info all from the Swamp, or from a letter Bumi sent. I personally think Return to Omashu-Imprisoned remix is more likely, just so we can prep Teo and the Mechanist for the Day of the Black Sun which we saw flashing by on the celestial objects machine just before we finally got the confirmation that Sozin's Comet is still a thing. Although The Avatar State could also be remixed into this in a sort of "yes, Earth Kingdom needs to free Bumi etc but I can't do it in Avatar State, we need to be smart.")

Episodes 7 and 8 were pretty chill in pacing issues. I thought Yue was a bit too quick in warming up to Sokka but considering how it was explained I can accept it. Also, the fact that Tui and La are intelligent enough to not be fish 24/7/365 is a change that makes sense although the whole Ice Moon (is it the local Halloween?) thing was very out of left field. Women joining the fight was a wild update and definitely more of a modern take than an early 2000s take. Do I have other thoughts? Sure, but I don't want to write bajillion essays and I just want a general overview in one post.

Zuko is, like I said, a standout. Absolutely love his conspiracy board, and as someone who writes a fic with a more scholarly inclined Zuko, I loved him being able to draw, being the foremost Avatar expert in the world (you can't tell me there can be more than one or two people out there who know more than Zuko at this point, look at his research), and having opinions about calligraphy brushes. Ugh, my heart. There's some absolutely wonderful acting happening and he does action really well. Is he a bit less explosive than in the OG? Sure, but one must remember, that adaptations are just licensed fanfics. His abuse background is in the performance, and my biggest question is the Agni Kai. There was a certain desperation in his face, so he must have wanted to make an impression on Ozai, and maybe felt a bit more like he had the right to it – as this show made it clear he had been invited in the War Council and did not needle his way in. Also the 41st twist oh holy smokes I just about screamed. His flaw is still anger and trouble thinking plans through.

Azula (her bangs in the flashback crack me up, was that her emo phase?) is more obviously affected by Ozai's games in this. I know OG Azula has loads of fans and there are loads of deep dives into her character and abuse and etc, but this is actually the first time her writing has made it obvious to me. She's still cold and calculating, but she's affected by more things and that makes her into a more approachable character for me. I know many fans got this from the OG portrayal so I know this is a me thing.

Sokka is another standout. I saw an interview where the actor was like "I tried to interject and ad lib humour where I could" and I appreciate it, because a lot of them made me cackle. There was some really good humour there. As for his arc and conflict; I think it's really interesting that he tries to live up to his dad's image of a warrior, and doing it very much out of duty. It isn't so much that he wants to be a warrior, but he wants to be good enough and I think that came through wonderfully. He can be a warrior, but it ain't his passion. It also offers very interesting bonding possibilities and parallels with Zuko. My heart broke at that ice-dodging scene in episode 5, as well as his heart-to-heart with Katara in episode 4 (fucking SIBLING LOVE TRIUMPHS). Also absolutely loved the fact that he supported Katara being a warrior in the North. His flaws in the OG are self-esteem issues (nailed here), and a certain level of arrogance, that affected his attitude towards girls at times. The latter has been removed but considering it only lasted until episode 4 in the OG series anyway, I don't see it as a terribly big deal. We can still get his "it'll totally work out this way" arrogant moment at pretty much any point in the story in the future.

Katara has trouble emoting. I don't know how much experience her actor has with acting, but I hope she gets better with practice. There are some very nice bonding moments she has with Sokka and Aang that bring emotion out, but she's very stone faced a lot of the time. One could read it as a symptom of seeing her mother being literally burned alive but that depends on how her arc is written in future seasons, and how it's acted. I really like the parallel with Sokka, of him trying to be a warrior out of duty, while Katara wants to be that and has trouble getting the opportunity to do so. This came out really well in episode 4. The fact that she was made a fucking commander of sorts at North was amazing moment of proving to her that she can be, that she is, a warrior. I'm kinda sad her temper has been left out of the writing, because with her being a self-taught water bender (which I'm okay with because we see her practising every fucking episode) there's a threat of her sliding into so-called Mary Sue territory. Hopefully Toph's inclusion brings her temper out next season. She's also missing some of her naiveté, although having a crush on the first good looking outsider (with fucking mirrored shots) just like her brother is hilarious.

Aang is... to mature. He gets a lot of really good and morally and ethically right speeches, and while he expresses that he's scared and doesn't know what he's doing, it still feels too mature. He also doesn't have that many dumbass child moments (what was that episode he just went "oops" in, that was funny and felt childlike, and then there was the water fight he had with Katara). It could be because we're going through stuff so fast but it'll be hard to fix later. I kinda like how his connection with Katara is being the last of their kind and loss – and then the small really good acting in ep7 when Katara says stewed sea prunes taste like home, and you can just see him go "oh, there's still someplace she can belong to, unlike me." I loved his calligraphy brush discussion with Zuko, because there was the beginnings of a bond there. As a friend said, it's nice they removed the Disney princess like love at first sight thing from the OG. If this turns into a romance (I have thoughts on that... later) I feel like it has a better chance to grow organically. No, I never shipped Kataang, please refer to the context part of this post.

Suki had a fun isolated, but curious, and socially awkward vibe to her. She's obviously different from the OG, but it's a fun and interesting difference, as the most characterisation we ever got for her was badass. Yue was interesting, more assertive and playful, which I liked. I also liked the fact that she had obvious duties and was expected to be the next chief. Even if the Northern Water Tribe sexism was kept, this felt like it added some dimension to it. June flirting with Iroh was hilarious, enough said. Mai and Ty Lee are blanks of wood. Their writing, and the direction they were given was horrible, and they're a prime example of that awkward standing and bad framing issue I mentioned way earlier. Ty Lee could have at least been bending herself into a pretzel, and Mai could have been using a knife to dig stuff from under her nails or something. I hope they get better writing and direction in the future.

Iroh was honestly pretty enjoyable. There were some moments of skilled evasive answering, but I was left missing him saying that Zuko was like a son to him. They do have really good chemistry though and you can see the care between the characters. I hated the long monologue at the end of episode 6, that felt very much beneath whatever target audience they were aiming for, and failed show not tell. Not perfect but can improve. Also, that one part where they played Leaves on the Vine, I almost died.

Ozai being a manipulative, abusive game addict is different but offers him some agency and motivation besides megalomania, which I appreciate. He had a peculiar expression when he burned Zuko, and that smells like hidden lore to me.

That's probably every character I feel like addressing at this point. However, I did mention romance in Aang's section, and I have to agree with the other whispers on the net. The fucking scarf scene. At this point, it's more likely for this show to be Zutara than Kataang IMO. BUT before people go and blow up about it, some points; cartoons offer more leeway in visual age differences, I feel like they would need to extend ATLALA plot line to last several years (instead of like, 9 months it's in the OG) to make it visually make sense. The Fortuneteller (as well as Katara's obsession with love?), and Aang's love at first sight have all been written out. Cave of Two Lovers was used for sibling love on the first season, and we ain't visiting that location again, not with how efficiently we did pretty much all of the Omashu stuff this season. Most of the Kataang iconic moments have been left out deliberately. Does this mean we'll get Zutara? Of course not, but due to the scarf scene, as well as that rivals thing they have going (we literally have two fights between Zuko and Katara this season, and the water sprout she used to thwart his fireball in episode one, and if that isn't a traditional beginning of a rivalry, nothing is), it's certainly more likely at this point than Kataang.

But we'll see, just like with everything else. It's an okay start, it's far from perfect, but it does offer new viewpoints that I find fascinating.

What's in the future.

I already explained my Return to Omashu-Imprisoned-Avatar State mash-up idea above, and that we'll likely miss the Library. I also think Avatar Day will be left out. I do however think, that we'll get the Deserter next season. We also need a way for Aang to learn about the Comet coming again and if Library is out (and probably also the Desert), best chances are IMO the Swamp or the Fortuneteller (remixing those two together is also possible). Or maybe Yeong Yeong has spies and they tell him about the Comet and he tells the Gaang. I also think they'll be foreshadowing/setting up White Lotus a bit more than we got in the OG.

I don't quite have my thought together enough to make any other guesses, but we will get Toph, Ba Sing Se, and Azula's Mean Girls Squad, but no clue yet how they'll be remixed. Season 2 has a much clearer timeline structure, whereas season 1 had a lot of episodic stuff that doesn't timeline wise offer too many roadblocks for remixes, as we saw with what they did with Omashu.

I think that's about everything I can think off. If you have comments, please be nice. This was mostly rambling, and tin foil hat baiting.

[luniviravosshipper]

Did Lissa Go Back to Soren and Claudia After Leaving?

I’ve actually had this post saved up in my drafts uncompleted for over a month now, but I got inspired by this post to finally talk about the theory I’ve been developing.

Buckle in because this is going to be a pretty lengthy post.

It seems to me that a lot of people are confused, as was I initially, about how old Soren was supposedly when everything happened, from him first getting sick to his mom leaving and the events from Puzzle House taking place.

Seeing that the little boy he was depicted as in the show could barely even speak and seemed extradionarly young, a lot of people didn’t understand if he was supposed to be the same age as he was shown to be in Puzzle House.

A lot of people just kind of assumed with the show depicting him so young and small compared to how we saw him in the graphic novel, that the writers were just diverging from their original canon and switching up what ages they wanted Soren and Claudia to be when everything happened. And others have just assumed the writers must have forgotten what ages they initially showed them as or that this is just another one of those cases where the writers weren’t able to write a proper timeline of events.

But… there’s kind of a lot of issues I’ve found in the logic of both assumptions. There’s actually a lot of things the writers have put in the show and its corresponding graphic novels and short stories that could point to neither of those two options being the actual case. I also think it’s incredibly unfair to suggest that the writers must have just been so stupid to have made such a slip up, if they did make one.

Regardless of what’s true, however, the one thing that’s clear is that the inconsistencies with how the creators choose to portray Claudia and Soren’s ages throughout the series has stirred up quite a bit of confusion and conflict within the fandom. So the question must be asked. Why?

Why so many inconsistencies? Are these inconsistencies evident of some sort of issue on the writers’ part, like one of the possible ones that’s been suggested by others that I’ve listed above? Or are these inconsistencies more evident of how the writers have actually intended to cause such confusion in the fandom space for an ulterior purpose that has yet to be revealed?

So, having those questions in mind, I’ve done a little digging and I think I might have figured out what’s going on from my investigation. Or I at least figured out part of it.

Let’s get into it.

From what I’ve seen online, Soren’s age in particular seems to be the main focus within the discussion surrounding what the kids’ speculated ages were when everything happened. Probably because of how most of these events specifically revolve around him and the fact that we’ve mainly seen him at different ages from Viren’s perspective. So I’ll start by talking about him first.

We first see Soren as this little kid who can almost barely pronounce his words with ruffled up hair and chubby cheeks back in episode 2 of season 5.

And for a very large part of season 6 we see him to be of that same age and of that same physical description in the flashbacks.

We even get a retelling of the same scene we saw when this version of him was first introduced back in season 5 in season 6. And it seems safe to assume that this retelling is supposed to be more representative of what actually happened than what we saw from Viren’s dream sequence, given that it’s a lot more negative.

So, right off the bat, that might already be an indicator that Soren was this young at some point in the series of events between him first getting sick and what happened in Puzzle House and this isn’t merely a distorted view of young Soren from Viren’s perspective.

Besides Soren, we also do see Claudia at a younger age in the series compared to how she first appeared in the Puzzle House graphic novel a couple of times.

And even earlier than that as well, back in season 5 in Viren’s dream sequence.

I wouldn’t say she’s as young as she’s been shown in the flashbacks in season 6 when she had the pig tails, but I also don’t think she’s quite the same age as she was in Puzzle House. It does look like she’s wearing the same undershirt as she was in the graphic novel, so maybe she’s closer to her age in Puzzle House here. But I think she looks like she could be more in between. (I actually have a smaller theory that this is supposed to be showing Claudia and how she looked like when she first learned dark magic because of the whole “I’m following in your footsteps” motif here.)

For the majority of the scenes we’ve seen of Claudia as a little kid though, we’ve mostly just seen her with those pig tails. And we haven’t seen her nearly as much as we’ve seen Soren. So we’ve been kind of led to believe that was her age when most of the events with Soren getting sick and healed and their mom leaving took place. I mean, we quite literally see her chasing after her mom leaving when she was that little.

But… Claudia does not look to be that young in the Reflections story “Lost Child”.

In fact, Claudia looks like how she did in Puzzle House here. And her mom is riding horseback when she’s leaving, making the setting of this image seem entirely different to the one we saw in season 6 of what we assumed to be her mom leaving.

I saw some people claim that Scholastic has restrictions for what ages characters can take in comics, which I haven’t found a source at all for yet, but some people think that that might have messed some things up with their age depictions in the show. But, this image comes from their official website where they don’t have to be subjected to such restrictions. And I just don’t see why they wouldn’t adjust their ages or the timeline of events in the show to make everything line up.

Puzzle House was first announced in September of 2022 with cover art and previews before season 5 was released in August of 2023. Even though it wasn’t officially released till after season 5, they were clearly working on it and planning the story for a much longer time before the season came out. They would’ve had plenty of time to fix their storyline so that it would make sense. But they didn’t. They still choose to depict Soren much younger then how we saw him in the graphic novel, and later on Claudia too in season 6. And we haven’t really found a good reason yet for why they would want to diverge from their already established canon. So, what if it was intentional?

So when I first started investigating everything, I went back to episode 8 of season 6 to look for a certain image. Because I could have sworn I did see Soren aged up, like he was in Puzzle House, in one of Viren’s memories. Which initially confused me because I had no idea what age we were supposed to have figured he had been when everything happened. And I did find it. It was this lovely shot of their entire family.

And Soren does not at all look like how we’ve been seeing him in any of the memories the creators have been showing us thus far of Viren’s. He has a different hairstyle and looks less chibi like. And he looks a lot closer here to how he looked in Puzzle House.

And so did Claudia.

At first, I was left even more confused about what was happening. Because I thought Lissa left when they were way younger. But this image seems to imply that she could have still been with the kids when they were older. Older then in the image we saw of Lissa leaving. And, a lot like many others, I originally thought that they were just trying to completely disregard the fact that they depicted them way older in the graphic novel and were trying to pretend that they were way younger in the show. Because this is perhaps one of the only shots in the show that we get to see them to be around the same age as they were in the comics and reflections stories.

But the thing is, only a couple seconds before do we get this shot.

And in this shot, do they actually look like how we’ve been seeing them so far in Viren’s memories. As very little toddlers.

So… what is happening here? How old were they actually when everything was happening?

Well, let’s review everything we know so far. Soren and Claudia were first depicted older in the reflection story “Lost Child” back in May of 2023 and the Puzzle House graphic novel back in September of 2022 way before season 5 came out in August of 2023, so there was plenty of time for them to change their depicted ages in season 5 to align more with the ages we’ve been previously shown of them having. And there was a large enough gap between the release of season 5 and season 6 for them to fix any issues with their timeline and depictions of their ages if there were any. And, in spite of how young they were depicted mostly in seasons 5 and 6, we still do see them depicted as similar ages as they were in the reflection stories and comics, so that obviously indicates that the writers are very much aware of the differences in their shown ages between those different stories. And it overall just seems like it’d be way easier and convenient for them to keep them aged up in the series to align with the ages we’ve already been shown of them having when a lot of these events first occurred if that was what they really wanted.

None of this information seems to point to the creators making a mistake or an accident in their different depictions of Claudia and Soren’s ages throughout the series. If anything, it seems to point to the opposite. Because why would they make any of these decisions in the first place if they weren’t for a specific intended purpose?

So, why exactly were Soren and Claudia’s ages so inconsistent and why were they mostly shown to be so young in the series? I think there’s only one answer here that really makes sense. Because they never really had a fixed age when everything happened. It all happened over a very long period of time. Spanning from when Soren was perhaps, like, four and Claudia was about two or three all the way to when they were around ten or something.

And this might mean that we have also been misled on one other thing (although it’s likely more on many other things, but that’s not the point here). When their mom actually left. Because there’s a chance that she might have left when they were much older. Long after Soren was actually healed from his sickness.

Because, a) what was that image in the reflections story about? And b) what’s up with Soren, Claudia, and Viren all being so emotionally distraught in the Puzzle House graphic novel about Lissa leaving if she left such a long time ago?

Okay, before I start explaining my second point, I should probably clarify something here. I initially thought and claimed awhile back that Atticus said that everything happened during a span of a year. I was completely wrong and I don’t know where I got that idea from. (I might have gotten confused since I saw someone else suggest awhile back ago that Harrow and Sarai got together only 5 to 7 months after that scene of Viren and Harrow talking in season 6. But in retrospect, that doesn’t really make all that much sense. Not that it’s their fault for having that misunderstanding, they were probably as confused as I was on the passage of time between, well, everything that happened in Viren and the children’s lives. The writers really did make it seem like everything happened all at once, but there was probably a lot more space between all the events that occurred as I’m trying to examine and explain in this post.)

All that King Atticus says is that it all happened one after the other. But he in no way specified a time frame of when and of how long.

However, after rereading Puzzle House, I have found that there is an indication made about the time frame between some of these events. That being the time between them first exploring the Puzzle House and Lissa leaving them.

It’s implied here that it’s only been a couple of weeks since she left because it’s only been a couple of weeks since Claudia has started to act more emotionally off.

I mean, I know that he also says that she’s been acting odd since Kpp’ar disappeared too, which we now know from season 6 that he disappeared before Soren got healed and when he was likely smaller. (This is actually where things seem sort of weird to me and I have trouble understanding the timeline of events most. I feel like he should have gotten coined when they were older because of the clear influence he’s had in their lives. But maybe they were actually older when he did and the two scenes that we saw of Lissa leaving and Viren shutting out Soren happened before Viren got the staff and was still trying to figure out how to heal Soren. But I don’t know. Why would Viren start resenting Soren so early on before he even healed him yet? Why would Soren be so much older when he actually got healed if we have only seen him be heavily implied to be young when he did? Why would Lissa leave then in the very beginning of everything, unless maybe it was in immediate reaction to Viren taking advantage of her and using her tears? But then why would she leave if Soren was still sick? Maybe that’s why she came back?? Because she felt guilty?? Maybe Lissa officially left later when Viren got the staff and she found out that he might have done something to Kpp’ar ??? I don’t know. This is all just speculation and I’m just not sure. Anyways.) But the fact he specifies that it’s been weeks since she hasn’t been speaking a lot and that she seems a lot more affected by what’s happened in their lives, I feel like that’s more of a sign that that’s the time frame from when their mom first officially left to them being in the Puzzle House.

And if it had only been just a couple weeks since Lissa left before they went into the Puzzle House, then that would better explain the image from the reflections.

It would also explain why a lot of the conflict in the graphic novel revolved around Claudia struggling to come to terms with her feelings on her mom leaving them and why Viren is shown to be so emotionally distant in it.

Then there’s the other hints that have been made outside of the graphic novel and the flashbacks we’ve seen.

There’s the information that we know about how Viren made attempts to win back Lissa’s trust, most notably by using the Sunray Monarchs to change his corrupted appearance. But Lissa wasn’t won over. And there was a lot of conflict that grew between them as a result which eventually encouraged them to split.

Of course, Viren could have tried to change his appearance and gain Lissa’s trust before the image we saw of Lissa leaving in season 6. But I think it would make more sense if it happened afterwards so that they would be fighting for longer and it would be while Soren and Claudia were old enough to be able to remember it.

And, I mean, just stating the most obvious explanation here. It’s like what people have been saying. How could they ask them to make such an adult decision? How could Lissa and Viren ask their kids to choose between the two of them? Probably because they could actually make the choice at the time. They could actually articulate their words and were grown up enough at the time to understand what was happening. They weren’t as small as we might have been led on to think they were. They were much older when she officially left them.

Anyways, I’m sure that there’s even more evidence I haven’t picked out yet that could also be hinting to Lissa leaving at a later point in the kids’ lives then we’ve been led to believe. (I would try to gather more intel from the novels but I sadly do not own either one of the two as of right now.) But in general, those are some of my biggest pieces of evidence I have to support my theory.

So, this very significant scene showcasing when Viren first started to resent Soren…

Might have happened way before Lissa actually left. And, given this added context that she hadn’t left yet (or at least permanently left), this completely reframes this scene and what it means.

And, that just leaves what is still largely unknown.

What is happening here exactly?

Not only does it completely contradict the image from the reflection story, but it also just outright doesn’t really make sense on its own.

Where does this fit into the timeline and what is its relevance?

Is this supposed to be showing Lissa trying to leave for the first time, even though she later on decided to go back, like I’ve been speculating? But then why would she go back? And why would she leave again only permanently that time if she chose to go back after the first attempt? What sparked her to try to leave both those times?

Truth is, I have some ideas and some of those ideas I’ve already listed and insinuated to having in this post, but overall I quite simply don’t know. The only thing I’m truly certain of is that this image alone suggests that there is a lot more going on here than we fully know about yet.

[ghost-husbands]

I have Thoughts™.

My perspective of Payneland and Cryland, under the cut because knowing me, this is gonna get long probably.

Before I begin, I wanna leave a little disclaimer and say I am not here with the intention of bashing any ship or any character. I love Charles because he's my favorite and that's that. I love Edwin as well. I think Payneland is fantastic and they really carry the whole show. I love it. I also like Crystal and the struggles she's had, the way she's carried them and survived them. I do have a soft spot for Charles x Crystal. I love them all, just to be clear. Not hear to bash anybody or throw shade...okay let's get to the other stuff.

Okay so I've always been one to pay a LOT of attention to the little details that the writers/directors/actors themselves with acting choices etc put into the portrayal of characters. Whether that's body language or dialogue or whatever.

When I think about what incites me to ship or not ship a pairing, I realize that it's a couple of things.

The chemistry that may or may not be there. It could be a pairing that interacts or does stuff together, and if they get along and it just seems so natural and doable, I can see that. This will usually be me thinking "Oh god, these people are perfect together. Look at the way A is looking at B! It's obvious B is in love with A" or whatever.

The circumstances - They could be two characters that the plot itself is driving together. Maybe star-crossed lovers or A pining for B etc.

And then there's the matter of the emotions/reactions that you can see between said characters. Now this fascinates me.

Taking a look at the Charles/Edwin dynamic and Charles/Crystal. I'm not so much intending to compare the two with the end of saying "this one or this one" when you can say "why not both?" Because frankly I love them both but differently. It's more to look at the relationships and those ideas I mentioned above in respect to these characters.

Charles x Edwin

Historically, they have a LOT more time together, by each other's side for 30+ years after Edwin finds Charles on the brink of death in that attic in 1989. Charles isn't ready to go and refuses to leave Edwin alone. From then on, they never part. As for what happens between their first meeting and when the show begins, I'm not extremely familiar because I haven't read the comics and all I do know is from what I've seen.

You can see that there is deep devotion between the two of them. They will protect each other (even if that's mostly Charles taking the beatings to keep Edwin safe) for sure, that notion is there. Edwin knows he can count on Charles and vice versa. Edwin definitely has feelings that he's struggling with through the season (being honest with himself as to what they are and dealing with the impossibly hard to bear burden of keeping those inside his heart bc he, prior to 1x07, doesn't know how Charles will react to this). Charles, on the other hand, cares very, very much for Edwin and would probably tear the universe apart if that was necessary to make sure that Edwin was alive, safe and sound by the end of the day. I've heard different things, but it seems to me that Charles also has these feelings, but it either didn't occur to him before or he didn't know how to identify or put those into words. That's perhaps why he said 'I can't say that I'm in love with you back' not 'I don't love you' or 'I'm not in love with you'. It was definitely NOT a rejection, I don't think so. Anyway, this is thought spilling for another moment.

A particular detail that hasn't left me alone since I saw it pointed out here...the fact that both Charles and Edwin, when they are embraced by other....BOTH of them, in those separate moments lay a hand over their heart. It affects them, they feel something there in the heart. What that is, I have no idea. I really want to know, and it's a delicious left-to-us-to-think-about sort of thing which in a way is much more fun than simply explaining it away with words. But that is contact (which, mind you, in theory, ghosts don't have) they wouldn't, theoretically feel.

And yet. When Charles hugs Edwin, Edwin afterward lays a hand over his heart and reacts as if something happened there, and I'm pretty sure it did. Same for Charles, when he hugs Edwin after they find out they're staying where they are...he feel something there.

Charles x Crystal

I know that this isn't a common ship (at least not nearly as popular as Payneland) and most will look at it from a perspective of "Not possible, he's a ghost, she's a human being. That's going to fall apart at some point". Some would also probably say that it's not something essentially romantic (that's looking at it and saying that what is there isn't love but could be friendship, other third thing whatever). I just want to look at Charles and Crystal as Charles and Crystal and pick apart the stuff we see.

Charles is compassionate, warm and has a big heart. I saw that from the beginning. He's the one who steps up and to Edwin's chagrin, announces that they'd be taking Crystal in until she's recovered. They go off on a walk and he enjoys it, even laughing when she's essentially mocking him, trying to be "mean".

The alley scene

His compassion really just struck a chord with me because of that moment in the alleyway. Now Edwin is upset (and I think he's right to be. Perhaps not in a shouty way but he's a little bit right) because the rhythm he's accustomed to with Charles has been turned on its head with Crystal's arrival. They have a demon to deal with on top of the cases they're working on, inconvenient stuff happens because of the little human being Charles has taken in, despite Edwin's displeasure. (Edwin is dear to me, and I love him. Not trying to bash him in any way...) So he's upset and he snaps, distinctly unhappy with the unnecessary problems the DBDA is met with because of Crystal. Crystal's patience is worn thin (poor girl had a nasty run in with demonic ex-boyfriend only moments before) and she gets mad. She snaps, and walks off. Charles watches her go, and Edwin makes a comment about how Crystal was yelling at "them" but Charles clarifies that it wasn't "them" as in, she wasn't yelling at Charles so much as Edwin. Anyway, all this is besides the point.

My point is that Charles at that point, follows after and listens, attentively, to Crystal relating how she feels that she can't go back to her home, that without her memories, that's how she feels. He looks pensive, considering what to do. What does he do? He wants to show her something. Tells her they need a mirror.

He shows her his parents, there in the mirror, and basically tells her that he relates. He knows what it's like. It just strikes me that he's being a little bit vulnerable here. We later find just how deep that stuff is inside of him, and we even get a little hint of that when he explains that his dad wasn't a very nice person. But he's showing her that he's listening, he knows what she means to a certain degree and just the act of doing that is reaching out, in a way, that's how I take it. His compassion.

The scene outside Jenny's shop

Crystal is shaken from what's just happened, and can't help but remember David and the toxicity of that relationship. Charles is there for her, and as I've said before, I think it's really interesting what he does next. He's sitting beside her on the curb and he just puts an arm around her. This is a comforting gesture, he knows, for her. Can he feel it? Aside from maybe physical pressure, no, not really. He just does it, for her. He doesn't get anything out of that.

The kisses - (or his attempt and her rejection, and the goodbye kiss)

Another point of interest for me was the kisses. It's established, confirmed in the canon by 1x07, I believe, that ghosts can't actually physically feel stuff like touch, a kiss or anything of that ilk. Earlier we see that when Charles tells Edwin he kissed Crystal. Edwin asks whether or not he felt it, and Charles (and this really is something that's been bouncing in my head) points to his temple, and says "...but I felt it here". Emotions? The emotional impact of it, rather than the physical effect it would have on him. Memory? He remembers what it's like to kiss and considers that, but still can't quite feel it.

Then, there's the moment when Crystal wakes up from that nightmare. (Part of me, not going to lie, thought, Charles would never hurt you...I don't understand how he could end up in a dream like that, confused with David the demon, but Crystal's trying to sort herself out). Charles goes in to talk to her, and the first thing he does is lean in as though to kiss her. Again, he's not gonna get anything out of that. It seemed to me like simple affection he wanted to show her, because we know he damn well won't feel anything. Not really. She pulls away because that nightmare really shook her and she's just not ready to pursue anything. (Which was good writing on the part of the show, it's realistic.) Just caught my attention that that had crossed Charles' mind to do that.

And then, the goodbye kiss.

Now this is more of a question from me. Why?

We see clearly that Charles isn't happy to see her go. He cares about her. She's his friend, he just doesn't want her to leave. Like 'he grabs her bags and holds them out of her reach "Nope you're not going"' doesn't want her to go. To his question of "Why does this feel like a goodbye goodbye and not a 'see you in London' goodbye?" she answers with a kiss. Doesn't say anything, just kisses him.

He looks a little confused, uncertain, trying-to-solve-a-puzzle about it. Which I think was an interesting (but not out of character) response to that, because he wouldn't have been able to feel it. But that begs the question, what exactly is it in his head that he does feel...

My final thoughts: I think Charles and Crystal are cute. According to show canon, no, it just can't happen on a logical level, according to where she is in trying to step back into her life and discover herself, and just the fact that he's a ghost. It wouldn't work. As friends, I think it's something sweet and I also think that the affection there is something real, something that they both need. And the characters as well. Affection, love and understanding are things all human beings need, and it's a lovely thing to see that given and received among all of our loved characters.

In the scope of fanfiction and the free creativity there, I'm open to possibilities because of the existence of AUs, different times, different places.

I certainly don't think that there's anything toxic to this relationship, but that's just me.

If you came to the end of this, bless you. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

[cadaveerie]

Are Alistair and the Warden alive? Will they be alive in The Veilguard? And how old are they?

This post with stunning older Alistair art inspired me to search a little about something. Along their art, OP asked the following:

"Is your Alistair still alive in Veilguard? I still don't know about mine. Grey Warden's have a 30 year span, give or take. There is a possibility he is still kicking, but probably close to the end."

And I wanted to know for sure. Since Alistair is one of the few companions that we have an exact date (year) of birth of (9:10), and we also happen to know when Duncan recruited him (9:29), this makes it possible to know Alistair's exact age and how close to the calling he is (if alive).

As op said, Grey Wardens have about 30 years after their joining until they get the calling. Doing some research (aka reading the wiki), I found a not so fun fact! There's this old interview with David Gaider in which he speaks of it:

DG: It's something I put in Alistair's dialogue that I now regret! Afterwards I was like, "Wow, thirty years is a long time for that time frame." I didn't really intend when I was writing it, and only afterwards when I went back I said "Oh...I guess it does sort of implies thirty years after you take the Calling, doesn't it..." Sorry, after you take the Joining. That wasn't really my intention. But it's out there now so I'm like, okay, thirty years. But the idea is also that it varies. Thirty years is the maximum that you could probably expect. It's going to vary for an individual according to their willpower and the level of their interaction with the darkspawn.During a Blight you can expect that the Grey Wardens are going to have shorter lifespans. Outside of a Blight the Grey Wardens would tend to live longer. We have instances in the game of people going on their Calling after five or ten years. Alistair's thirty year quote shouldn't be taken as gospel, that's the way I like it.

So basically... Most people probably don't make it those 30 years. And if there's a blight, the life expectancy is even less.

Here's the math: Alistair joined the Grey Wardens at 19 (9:29), and was born in 9:10. The events of DATV start at 9:54 (10 years after Inquisition), which means... At the moment that The Veilguard begins, Alistair will be 44 years old (if alive), and it will have been 25 years since he did the joining. This means that he's, AT MOST, 5 years away from the calling (which btw, is 6 years for the Hero of Ferelden, if they're alive).

But there's another thing to consider, and that is... both the warden and Alistair fought a Blight, which as David Gaider said, makes their lifespans even shorter.

My hope is that since the Blight only lasted one year or less (which is not much considering how much other Blights lasted. Like, the first one lasted almost 200 years), this will reflect in his lifespan and will give both him and the warden more years to live. And technically speaking, I'd expect that the fact King Alistair is not adventuring to the Deep Roads (presumably?), he shouldn't have been close to darkspawn after he was crowned... Sooo, if the writers were to take that into consideration, it'd make sense that he lives longer than other wardens that might visit the deep roads. But perhaps this is just wishful thinking on my part, lol.

Having said all of this, please keep in mind this is all speculation. Perhaps what David Gaider said has been retconned to some extent since at least 2012 (January 14, 2012).

For all we know Alistair might have already died, for this or other reasons, and perhaps the Warden as well (which... would kinda suck I guess, but I suppose I wouldn't be that surprised). Although I admit that the fact that the Warden was looking for a cure in DAI gives me some hope. Perhaps in the 10 years between the end of Inquisition and the beginning of DATV the Warden has already found a cure? Perhaps they find it at some point during DATV, very last minute to prevent their deaths? Everything is possible. Even if I get the impression that the writers don't seem very interested in the Warden having more importance in the games... Since The Grey Wardens have made a comeback, it'd make sense to know about this if it happens! I have hope hahaha.

[nocreativityfornames]

whats your opinion on the whole shipping alastor thing?

I'm not TOO bothered by it?

I mean, as long as you're not a bigoted asshole purposely dismissing this part of his identity because you don't respect the sexuality and the community and wish the writers had written him differently, I don't think it's THAT big of a deal.

Don't get me wrong, I still think it's a bit icky to do it even with no harmful intent. Similarly to how I think it's icky and eyebrow-raising to make a gay character straight for your amusement or to make a POC character white for the same reasons, even if you didn't mean any harm.

But at the end of the day people are going to do whatever they want whenever they want, what a portion of a fandom is doing isn't going to have an impact on the original work, these characters will maintain their intended identities in canon, and I don't have the energy to be arguing with people who'll probably dismiss all I have to say.

I mean, they're already doing that. Because I've seen way too many instances of people yapping "It's fiction, relax!" or "It's a spectrum, just because a person is aroace doesn't mean that they don't have sex/can't date!" whenever an aroace person gives an opinion on this topic that isn't "I'm okay with this and I actually ship aroace characters too."

Anyway, my conclusion is: you wanna take an aroace character and ship them with another character, write x reader fanfiction, etc? Go ahead, it's your life, do your thing. But at least be respectful of that sexuality and the community? Don't be a jerk if an aroace person expresses discomfort with what you're doing or simply disagrees with you, be understanding. 

And to my fellow aroace people and the allies who are out there trying to educate the fandom on our sexuality and express a view of this that isn't the "I'm completely fine with this" one and are being met with the same annoying and repetitive invalidating replies or straight up aro/ace-phobia, just don't engage. For your own sake, just block them. Don't stress yourself out.

But yeah, it's not necessarily the shipping that bothers me, it's the disrespect coming from some people who are into the shipping. It's just... tiring. And I could write a whole essay on how frustrating it is that people don't value platonic relationships as much as romantic ones and how aroace people are just always being dismissed.

But not to end this on a negative note: I loooove that Alastor is aroace and the weirdo has a special place in my heart.

I love his interactions with Lucifer (my 2° fave :^), they're funny as hell and I wanna see more of their friendly rivalry next season. I can see them being that kind of chaotic besties that argue and bicker with each other all the time but are there for one another when shit goes down and I'm so here for it.

He and Rosie are also a delight. Love them with all my heart, I had an amazing time whenever they appeared on the screen together and those were for sure some of my favorite moments.

Also, Vox's being tragically in love with Alastor and not being reciprocated AT ALL it's just funny to me. I don't like TV man, make him suffer. 

Anyway, Alastor is the best character in this goddamn show and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise, thank you for coming to my ted-talk :))))))

[rahuratna]

Hi! I have a one am musing 🥹

I was rewatching jjk season one (I still haven’t finished season two but I need to cope LOL) and now I’m able to pick up all the little details we talked about before. *heart melts*

It’s so crazy to me how in the very beginning Nanami didn’t acknowledge Yuji as a sorcerer, and by the end, he told Yuji to be the one to take over from here. It’s so bittersweet…

Tbh, the very first time I watched that episode, I was super shocked and thought Nanami was patronizing Yuji. And then I learned that wasn’t the case. He was being very matter-of-fact about it and knows Yuji has a lot of room to grow 🥹💕💕

Yuji was super eager to prove himself to Nanami, and then Nanami was like “frankly I don’t give a shit.” But in reality, he really does as he gets to learn more about Yuji, and so while I was terribly upset with s2 ep 18, his last words were the perfect conclusion.

(This is just a side note but I like it more when writers show off Nanami’s practical-minded nature more. How it may seem cold and standoffish at first but it wasn’t intended that way. I wish I got to see more of Nanami being blunt with criticism since different people could react differently to it and it’s who he is!)

———-

I also realized that Gojo got new glasses LMAO. Didn’t see it before, but his high school ones were circular and his newer ones are more oval. I kinda glossed over it when he shops for new glasses in the “Lost in Paradise” ending. I personally like his high school sunglasses better. What about you?

Hi! And thanks for these lovely 1 am musings. It always makes my day to see one waiting for me 🤭 I also needed to take a moment to cope before moving on with season 2 (didn't help much, but necessary).

Nanami initially struck me as very contradictory, because there he was, taking a jab at the system (in his capacity as both a salaryman and as a sorcerer), saying that "work is shit", but also bowing formally to a teenager when he introduced himself and wearing a full business suit to kill curses!

I saw his lack of acknowledgement of Yuuji as another "fuck you" to the system. Here was Yuuji, a vessel to one of the most powerful curse users to ever exist, and he was essentially treating him as just another kid. I didn't necessarily see it in a good or bad light, it just struck me as a very deliberate choice on Nanami's part.

Of course, his later actions and his background showcased these things in a completely new way. Like you said, he cares a great deal for Yuuji and the younger generation of sorcerers. The fact that his last words to Yuuji were "you take it from here" is such a fitting culmination to his character arc.

He saw his duty as a guardian and protector of the young and the weak finally coming to an end, because they were now able to protect themselves better than he could. He saw Yuuji as completely fitting of carrying his legacy forward, and so let him know that he could now pass in peace.

I, also, wish we could have seen more of Nanami's interactions with others. The way Ijichi is actually more terrified of Nanami scolding him than anything else, describing him as the 'ultimate adult' or something along those lines, will never not be funny to me. Especially since Nanami is the type of man to never raise his voice in a professional setting. His pragmatic nature would probably have given us many more moments of misunderstandings, sweetness and humour, should it have been explored in greater detail.

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As to Gojo's sunglasses, I do like the older style better! They reflected a lot of his irreverent, cheeky and offbeat personality. I suppose the oval shape is a style choice that changed as he grew older and matured, but yeah, I definitely preferred round lenses better!