#it’s soooooooo. unfortunate. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

junepegbert · 2 years

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brndnelas smmlsaaal

#ksospspspsuygsgdhdh…….&.&.$:#so anyways.#it’s soooooooo. unfortunate.#how much i hate the idea of being cared for #or well i don’t hate it #it just feels. wrong on every level #like all day today whenever one of my buds tried cheering me up i ended up wincing cause it felt so wrong #and like i love it and i appreciate it because it’s more than i could kindness than i’d ever dare ask for or much less wish for #but i still can’t get over the idea that i haven’t earned it or don’t deserve to feel bad or whatever #i mean part of it’s also how i struggle actively helping myself #ie there are things i know make me be better. but i actively chose to avoid doing them #because well on some fundamental level i don’t really want to feel good. like at the core of my being i do deserve to feel awful constantly #but i rarely do feel bad because i get used to whatever problems too fast #so i dunno. i guess i just hold onto whatever sadness or anything i get because it’s the closest to me ‘getting what i deserve’ that i’llget #and i don’t want these people i love to worry about me or even think about me in the context of someone who needs help but i’m still just.#like. some dumb kid y’know. and it’s so upsetting all the time #and i dunno i guess i could go on about my dad #and say something like ‘ah with him i had to earn love and respect! these people just love me no matter what and it feels wrong’ but that’d #simplify this way too much. i’m just kinda miserable at the core of the concept of ‘me’#so i dunno. it’s hard. i don’t like it. and i don’t think i realistically can get better from it #because well i only ever day dream about getting *worse*#and getting everyone around me to finally see me for who i think i am and so they all leave me #but it’s so. i dinno.#vent

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housewifebuck · 5 months

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FMK Buck, Eddie, and Maddie 👀

Oh girl this is mean 😩 fuck buck. I would turn his prostate into silly putty. Marry Maddie obviously bc once she’s my wife I can motorboat her every day. And then maybe Eddie and Helena can get a 2 for 1 deal on cemetery plots 🩷

#sorry to be objectifying women so much tonight I’m just soooooooo so so gay #and unfortunately no better than a man:(#asks #office hours

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deus-ex-mona · 6 months

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rage is a ✨way of life✨

#found out that i successfully angered someone by not showing up to work on saturday lmaoooooo #and im just like… gOOOOOOD. BE MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!#mans has no room to be mad anyway. it’s his fault i had to ot for 7 hours to cover his work for him in the first place soooooooo #a nd he’s getting demoted next year and im ahauxucjsjjsjsjsjxjdhss #in other news im kinda annoyed by my mother’s (unfortunate) pressuring of me to go to the upcoming family christmas gathering :(#like no way manssssss i haven’t seen the extended fam since my grandma’s funeral and i’d like to keep it that way thanks~~~~~~~~#and a c h r i s t m a s gathering of all places… m a n. im half expecting them to drag everyone to church to end off the gathering…#i wouldn’t put it past the hosting aunt to do that ngl. she had tricked me into attending a church service in the past and all…#like. man. there’s this local mall that has a similar name to said church service…#so ofc it’s normal to assume that said mall is what she was referring to when she said ‘let’s go to [insert name]!’ with no context right???#and uggshdhdjjsjsjdjs i don’t wanna be introduced to my cousins’ kids as ‘auntie [insert nickname i hate]’ bc that’s lame #and m a n. i definitely don’t wanna interact with my cousins’ kids. i either don’t know or can’t pronounce (or both) their names #i only remember the oldest one’s name (bc he has a stereotypical frat boy name) and the one who’s named after a ninja turtle #but none of the rest. i think some of them have names from my cousins’ spouses’ home countries? dk about the others though #i’m 80% sure one of the girls was named something like ‘triceratops’ but that doesn’t seem right…#being named after a dinosaur sounds cool though… or any prehistoric creature really #if i could choose my own name i’d like it to be ‘coelacanth’#just so i can say ‘i coelacan’t do it!!!!!’ if someone asked me to do something i don’t wanna do. the pun potentials are endless mans #huh. wow… i started this off with a mad coworker and ended it by turning into a coelacanth… how did we get here anyway…?#oh wells no one reads the tags anyway uehxudjdjdjsjsjss my secrets are ✨safe✨

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jrueships · 6 months

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Do you think Josh went to Stef's big birthday bash? I didn't see him in any photos... maybe it was too fancy for him to get invited??

damn, i guess josh didn't care 😭 LMFAO

tbh tho.. i would not either.. if i saw this.. my number one conspirer. Yep, going right back through that door once i see that. Clearly, im intruding on family activities, ill be in the car waiting for u like a dog LOL

hes including himself in this

i love how trev looks so done with him, his brother's eldest sister queen syndrome 😭. Does that cake have fondant on it ??

of COURSE he wants that giant dumpster of a car, of COURSE. Let's calm down, veruca salt

#stef wearing all white like hes abt to get married and making everyone else wear black bcs theyre not the bday boy 😭#THATS why josh isnt there!#theyre having their collective bachelor parties <3 thats all <33 #crisis averted 😊#that belt of pearls ouuuuuuuuu ok aprhodite emerging from an oyster #idk why but he looks so cute and stout here like #a picture of josh bearhugging stef wouldve been soooooooo perfect #i would be soooo happy #sigh #but unfortunately josh accidentally wore grey and not black and stef just couldnt allow that mishap on his hands #ruining HIS special night #into the doghouse with u josh 😔 either get ur shades right like a true girl or die i guess #this shindig seems way too fancy for a lot of football teammates but ESPECIALLY the farmers only .com bills like #we literally had cole beasley on the team once like #i dont rlly blame him for keeping things elegant only 😭#BUT THAT MEANS HE BETTER HAVE 2 PARTIES BCS DAMN :(#dont worry they had a lockerroom gangb*ng or whatever #mckenzie even came back for it!#dude trust me i watched #every nba/nfl tumblrina can be omnipresent if we all just try hard enough #source? dude just trust me #ted asks #diggs

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sjweminem · 8 months

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ashamed of the hold this image has on me

#he is soooooooo weird looking <3 #my low-grade mads mikkelsen thirst has been at surface level for a couple weeks unfortunately

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lhazaar · 9 months

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sometimes i feel like i have a lot of online drama and then i remember i've been on this site since 2011 and never had a callout post written about me that wasn't done as part of a bit so i must be doing SOMETHING right

#bark bark #i'm joking lol mostly it's 'not doing shit that's callout post worthy'#unfortunately i have at least one ex who would do that shit for harassment campaigns so you've gotta be wary right #the real reason that it feels like i have a lot of online drama is extremely Online Brained ex-partners who have variously attempted #to drag me into their shit to varying degrees for a long time #plus a healthy dose of deep social isolation as a teenager and unchecked mental illness in myself + all my peers #the ways in which depressed teens can hurt each other online can be soooooooo personal tbh

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marnz · 26 days

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love to receive a branded keychain as a thank you from work leadership as opposed to something meaningful such as, idk, more paid time off or cash

#currently #sorry to be negative but it’s just insulting #unfortunately PTO & $$ must be negotiated with union but they could have done that instead of giving me branded shit I don’t need #also if you give it to EVERY employee then the ‘in recognition of your service’ isn’t meaningful #this does beat being given a gratitude journal for employee appreciation day #which is what happened at my last job #I googled this and apparently studies show that gifts motivate employees more than cash or gift cards #which is soooooooo funny lol like if i was being paid a living wage then MAYBE #but uh. cash is literally always the best option to me. as we live in one of the most expensive places on earth #anyway sorry just venting #last year they mailed everyone branded hats and the postcard said ‘hats off to you’

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flovverworks · 1 month

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random ramblings so i can delete some of my ooc posts in my drafts

in my heart u add akira on messaging apps & get a cat sticker saying good morning everyday

akira & their item collection of varyingly obvious cat-related items. guy whos way too weak to anything cute but also not likely to buy stuff thats like...overly in-your-face about it either?! u know when merch is more subtle....(says this knowing i say akira gets cat-themed decorations and plushies and pillows. easiest guy on earth to give gifts to. its more their day-to-day items that are more subtle.

feels like its been a while since i said this but, big romantic. i need to make a list of times akira has said some ridiculous stuff about romance unprompted (its like a secret rendesvouz, WHYA RE U SAYINGG THAAAATTTTTT

also been thinking about akira forgetting the wizards can do magic for tiny things ("oh no let me get a bandaid"/"wont you be cold like that?"/"its kind of dark here"). because i think its funny. like their constant dilemma over snow&white's ages (very aware they are Old As Hell but also 'yeah theyre 9-no...wait...'), but also how they forget the others are centuries old too......post-mhyk akira going oh ure only 150yo? (not fazed anymore) <-this is a joke, theyd still react but they would also think 'not as old as the twins & figaro........'

patpat

anyway akira referring to mithras space-door as his arthim thing is one of my big enjoyments, so i like to imagine they start doing that with the others spells too..........

ok thats all the repetition i have for now

#stardust speaking !#i need to write a new cat-related open the last was in july. if i dont count the cat-decoration one from late november #im rereading the western etude atm and chloes soooooooo cuteeeeeT_T #(chloe voice) hawawa #i lov him sooooooo much #i always think of that time when akira wished they knew what to say to chloe and the time they were like 'chloes just that good'#me too #chloe's tanabata.............................akira and chloe both on the verge of tears about the reality of forgetting/being forgotten.#mithra who unfortunately(fortunately?) was in the middle of it #since theres noone to blame theres nowhere for the pain to go.................

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yo9urt · 2 months

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

#mine #the thing they gave me for my dentist appt was basically non-name-brand xanax #it was soooooooo strong im not gonna lie #unfortunately i was still really upset and on edge and uncomfortable the entire time i wasi n the appointment #so i feel kind of lied to because the lady said i would 'not care' what was happening but let me tell you... i did care #but it was a little less unpleasant than most appointments so thats ok #anyway the point of this post is wow it is a really strong pill i spent most of the day like. half asleep #including taking an actual nap which is not common for me #althoug h i also napped yesterday but thats becaues travel threw off my sleep schedule #and having an 8am did too honestly its just been weird lately #whatever. zzz

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walshball · 7 months

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Mary…

#I’m fag??#the body bangs unbelievably #the stylist will unfortunately be shot #she’s soooooooo #I need her to *** ** ** **** and **** ** ******#cough cough #mary earps #engwnt #lionesses

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zecoritheweirdone · 9 months

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me when i think about vagabonds by scorpionoesit for too long

#zecori rambles #my art #realized that this is my blog and i can post whatever the hell i want here. you all have to suffer L /lh #idk if i've talked about this fic; like. a Lot here. but know i am so so so normal about it #(i am vibrating in place as i say that)#i wanna talk about it so so soooooooo fucking badly #i need to ramble to someone about this fic #i also feel the need to make more art for it #unfortunately a good portion of the characters don't actually have mentioned designs; and i am. bad at making them myself sknddknsks #mainly the outfits; the outfits is what trips me up #this goes double for superhero/villain outfits. and guess what fic is a superhero/villain fic;;; sksnwksjks #i'm also bad with poses. tried drawing that one scene where tommy finds masquerade on his couch and. it is Not Good.#shoving it in a closet and never speaking of it again.#(didn't know. how to draw karl on the couch 😔. tried looking up the pose he was mentioned to be in; but uhhh–#–let's just say there were no good reference pics;; fkdjksjs)#anyway. holding this fic so gently. it lives in my mind rent free #mx. scorpio if you're reading this. o/.#you know; next time i get motivation to draw; i should make digital art of v!michael. haven't done that yet;; dkdjsksj #or i could also continue drawing vagabonds dragons designs like i did yesterday;;; skdjskjsksjs

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leatherbookmark · 7 months

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a thing i have JUST realized, isn't the human brain amazing lol -- is that we talk about izzy's thoughts and feelings on ed, on blackbeard, about how he serves one but not the other, etc, etc, and how it means he never loved or even respected the True Man Underneath It All but rather the bloodthirsty legend of a pirate--

e x c e p t izzy is not the first person who makes the distinction between edward and blackbeard. it's ed himself, when he says "actually, i want to be called edward from now on".

before, when he was with stede, it didn't bother him at all that the crew called him blackbeard. that was his name! he was blackbeard, what else would they call him. only stede and izzy got to "ed" or "edward" him, because they were closer -- stede was his first close friend, izzy was his friend and first mate for decades. (note that fang was with ed the longest, but he doesn't call him by his name! you gotta deserve it.)

izzy doesn't do anything inappropriate or out of proportion when he snaps at the crew to call him blackbeard or captain -- that's who ed is, is supposed to be, to them. they're not friends! they even call stede captain, and have you seen that guy?

it's ed that makes the connection between his current state: draped in fuchsia robes, singing sad songs about how sad he is, showing his vulnerable and emotional state in front of people who are supposed to respect and trust his authority. and by that he splendidly loses that authority, to the point that wee john calls him ed, and when izzy snaps at him for disrespecting his captain, ed goes no, actually, yknow what, do call me edward! and then he goes on to encourage the crew to sing as well and hey, actually, why are we being pirates! we should do a talent show!

the distinction is clear here. before all that, in izzy's eyes, his boss was blackbeard, captain, ed/edward -- different names for different occasions, but one and the same guy. but now? this guy singing songs in a pink bathrobe doesn't want to be called blackbeard, he's edward! ed time now! we're going to eat marmalade and express our feelings in front of everyone! and hold talent shows! Ya Hoo !

yeah, it's no wonder izzy doesn't want that. he wants his competent captain back, and this current dude, edward? he's not him. so, uh,

#shrimp thoughts #AND it's not izzy that's the final nail to magenta ed's coffin. it's the lads calling for EDDIE to come and sing for them again #right after izzy -- his first mate! the guy who followed him for all those decades with only mild complaining and an occasional #fed up tirade here and there -- tells him he has no reason to respect him the way he is now. if that's the way with izzy -- then fuck!#what about these guys? those basically strangers to whom he stupidly bared his soul? who are treating him like a source of entertainment?#man's just lost izzy's support. he doesn't have stede (the guy who has the sort-of loyalty of the crew). and the crew respects and admires #blackbeard -- but ed? eddie? uh oh.#look at his face and body language before and after the 'hey eddie give us another song!'. before: he's clearly upset by what just happened #but he starts to fix the robe on himself. starts trying to deal with it and stuff. but the second he hears that one sentence? he freezes.#he turns his head towards the source of the voices -- the crew chanting his name -- very slowly. his eyes are barely moving #this is not to say that izzy's words had no effect on him because they clearly did! but he did not go full kraken to make a point that izzy #is wrong and actually pink and karaoke are good. he goes kraken because attack is the best defense. and it's so fun when #everyone laughs at your jokes and claps when you sing! it's just that people are fickle as fuck :/#tl;dr the bekrakening is a complex process that doesn't have its source in one grumpy first mate who just wanted everyone to do their jobs #but rather in a fuckton of factors from which one was -- yeah -- stede abandoning ed after he bared his feelings to him. leaving him a #confused raw wound. which would be fine if ed was a teenager but unfortunately he's a scary pirate who loves a good maim #this post is soooooooo long oh my god i could have fit it in three short paragraphs probably

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ilostyou · 8 months

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unfortunately i love a good charlotte tilbury product

#theyre so expensive but like . sooo good unfortunately #and other reasons #but mostly just soooooooo many dollars :\#rambling

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phoenixiancrystallist · 11 months

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Month 7, day 12, working on cleaning up the base color for Frey's face/hair/eyes/etc before I start on actually doing shading. I know it looks like a whole lotta crap right now, but it'll look better the more I work on it, I promise 💜

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rooolt · 2 years

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Me solemnly listening to the falsettos songs i put on my dndads character playlists because i cant relate the jewish aspects to any of the characters

#Unfortunately it is the most goyische podcast I’ve ever listened to #Tied with taz I’d say #But like I have songs like everyone hates his parents on my scary and norm playlists #And they’re not having bar mitzvahs 😔#Father to son is soooooooo dndads core #And yet #also March of the falsettos is so season one pcs #I’m sure I’ve said all these point before but I will constantly spread my falsettos dndads agenda #Look at 80% of my fic titles #I’m normal 😃👍#dndads #dungeons and daddies

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dumplingcatho · 1 year

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s2 warrior nun time!!!!!!! plssss i hope the show will wrap up in a somewhat satisfying way cryingg

#cinematography just as good if not better!! there were a few really nice shots in there #also inchrestinggggg everyone's scattered and adriel's started a cult #i do not trust that miguel boy get his ass beatrice #also miss journalist hacker like??????? i hope you are a solid contribution to the plot bc i thought the conflict would be enough lmao #beatrice and ava have their gay moments good for them #i do have to wonder about jillian.......... good stuff #unfortunately to nitpick. WHAT ARE THOSE LOCATION TITLE SHOTS???? WHY THOSE COLOURS????#it's cool they wanna go for striking colours for the titles but they are so incongrous ugh #also lilith's scream at the end of the ep is kinda funny cuz of the zoom it feels sitcom-esque or slapstick haha #in other news lilth is soooooooo hot. i'm love her HOWEVER girllll you've been so diligent up to that point #even i was like GET HIM TO GO IN FIRST but it's worth it for the epic fight! also can't she teleport past the bars ;-;#hope they'll impose some rules for her demon powers esp the teleportation like she gets tired or smth if not then it's overpowered #cat watches warrior nun

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