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#it’s still their fault for choosing evil obviously. but it would be so funny
neo--queen--serenity · 7 months
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I know we all like to joke about Fukuzawa’s spectacularly bad taste in men, but I think we should consider the possibility that it might be the other way around. Maybe Fukuzawa just inspires insane, manic levels of devotion and obsession in the men who fall for him, did you ever think of that
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absolutebl · 3 months
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This Week in BL - The unexpected rise of cooking crush & seme bjs
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
Jan 2024 Wk 3
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Ongoing Series - Thai
The Sign (Sat YT) ep 9 of 12 - I love this show so damn much. This may be my KinnPorsche. It’s just so endlessly entertaining in a perfectly unhinged way. I love that they looped Tharn’s dad back into the murder investigations.
You know kinksters have invented necklaces that can’t come off… right? Just saying.
Meanwhile, would it still be BL if our seme didn’t wake up from drowning and instantly go chase snake?
No. No it would not. 
Remember the one hard and fast rule of BL? When a seme gives a BJ it’s penance. Phaya is apologizing to Tharn for leaving him behind.
Heh. Hard and fast. I kill me. 
Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 10 of 14 - How is this absurd creature managing to rise in the ranks? Pavel turned in some stellar grief and ALANJEFF have my whole heart. I make Ikea puns in the... Trash watch happening here.
Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 7 of 12 - The make-out montage was absolutely charming and very much American rom com style - interesting (and rare) to see in a BL (not to mention from OffGun. How far we have come since Puppy Honey?)
Meanwhile, another wonderful grandma in a BL!
Next week we do an actual harken back to Puppy Honey, so obviously I’m now enjoying this whole show way more than before. I think it helped that I watched it earlier in the week, when it wasn’t competing with any other BLs. 
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Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 11 of 12 - Not gonna lie, I knew from you all that this was gonna be a rough ep. But I very clearly remember the penultimate Bad Buddy ep so I now have slightly more trust than others in GMMTV on this matter. 
That said, this was a crap episode.
You can’t set Mork’s truth and character motivation reveal up like that and then have his lover choose to dismiss him in a way that diminishes not just both character's growth AND all of Mork's actions towards Day, but also our faith in every other character. It was a shitty narrative thing to do to us, and it was a shitty thing to do to Mork. And that doesn’t even take into account the forgiveness allotted by the story to Day’s unrepentant excuse for a mother.  The doom should have been handled differently. The mom shoudl have leaned in even more evil and actively lied to split them apart.
I don't know if they can redeem this misstep in the final episode. But I'm interested to see them try. That said, this plot seem to be true to the book. 
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For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - A major trigger has landed. But also it’s clear who’s fault that incident was... and it’s not Him’s. So Blue's so-called-friend really is unhinged. This episode was a little bit more engaging than last week, but it’s only because stuff actually happened. I’m still not sure I enjoyed it. 
Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 12fin - Despite the fact that I’ve been annoyed by the show the last couple of episodes, I’m still sad for it to end. It was a good reveal and First had the right response. Also a very sports way to end it. Sprite is a v clingy bf. 
In brief?
A messy very Thai pulp sports romance that actually managed to involve sports in an identical twins trading-places plot. Basically Not Me meets HIStory 2 Crossing the Line (although vastly inferior to either) with an endearing main character and a good lead pair (poor things), both soapy and earnest without too much camp. It tried so hard but the plot, side couples, and extraneous characters let us down. Passable if not great. 7/10 
Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 2 of 10 - Eh. Whatever. 
My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 22 of 24 - skipped this installment
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Ongoing Series - Not Thai
Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Gaga) ep 2 of 10 - Funny how quickly he retracted that confession and everyone called him out for doing it too soon (including me from a narrative beats perspective). It was a cute screw up - I see what your meta-arse is doing there, Japan. Also our Tokyo-boy’s serious reserved earnestness is extra adorable in the surrounded by Osaka enthusiasm context. His accidental flirting is that much more heart wrenching for our poor baby seme.  And they ended this ep with honorific negotiations!! Be still my heart. I’m really adoring this show.
Your hyung romance super fan is back in the game! 
Meanwhile the Osaka accent is beyond adorable. 
Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 6 of 8 - Japan what are you doing? I do love the not-sorta-ex from the past. 
VIP Only (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 10fin - I loved all the young people in the hawker center supporting the campaign against the terrible mother. They make a good domestically sappy couple. But that is Taiwan's specialty.
In brief?
A sweet if aimless story about a writer and a chef finding love via noodles, fake dating, and family challenges. If it had a tighter script and a shorter run, more like a KBL this might’ve been quite special. But it didn’t and it lost me too many times. 6/10
I don’t like to be disappointed by Taiwan. 
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It's done: I Need to Catch up
What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.
The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?
Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - Is TRUST Entertainment bringing us the first ever Burmeses BL? I don't know if it's really the first, but @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch through.
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It's Airing But...
[INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.
Beside You (Thai YouTube) - a 3 sp short that's supposed to have started but I can't find it.
Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.
Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.
The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Ends next week. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.
7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.
Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?
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In Case You Missed it
All my year-end round ups:
TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023
Top 10 BL Secondary Pairs of 2023
2023 BLs Best Trope Execution Awards! TOP 10
All the BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen
BL 2023's Best:
Back Hugs Thailand & Elsewhere
Cute Bits of Domesticity
Boys Feeding Boys
BOOP!
Best Cuddles
Heads in Laps
Touching Head Touches
Thailand Put His Head on Your Shoulder
Put Your Head on My Shoulder (not Thailand)
BEST KISSES (not Thailand)
BEST KISSES FROM THAILAND
Next Week Looks Like This
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1/23 Happy Ending is a new high school set Strongberry 20 min short staring the actor who played Milk on Choco Milk Shake, so... YES PLEASE. I'm not sure where it will air but we all have our fingers crossed for Gaga or YT. Or both.
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1/24 Love For Love's Sake (Korea Gaga & iQIYI)- based on the Manhwa ‘Love Supremacy Zone’ by Hwacha. A young man is dropped into a game based off a novel he loves. His mission is to make another player, YeoWoon happy. But then the game starts unfolding completely different from the novel.
Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
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Viva la BL grandma superiority! (Cooking Crush)
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Cooking Crush casually givign us some lovely lesbians (as indeed did The Sign). GL makes for a lovely acessory BL, carry on.
Now GMMTV, give us the REVERSE.
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I love this dork SO MUCH. (Pit Babe)
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I love that Cherry Magic is doing this scene over. One of my favs from the original.
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Yai is BEST BOY. MVP and most likely the winner for 2024's Namgoong award.
(Last week)
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chippedaxe · 3 years
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yessss for karl?! omg yess please pleas please can you write a dom step sis! reader ruining innocent stepbro! karl!!
like she teases him and he just isn’t experienced at all and she just fucking destroys him, wanking him until the sensitive little bunny is crying and begging to stop from overstimulation
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Title: Silly Boy
Warnings: !TW: STEPCEST!, NSFW (Minors DNI), cursing, corruption ig, blackmail, degrading, teasing, humiliation, penis degrading, small penis, overstimulation
Pronouns: She/her Afab
Synopsis: The reader dominates Karl and knocks him down a peg.
Word count: 2k
Note: If this type of content offends you in any way then please just ignore it, I have tons of other content on my page that isn't stepcest content and you're able to blockout any stepcest content by blocking the 'tw sepcest' or 'stepcest cw' tag <3
- This prolly isn't what u wanted but I thought of this and wanted to write it! also this hasn't been proofread and it hasn't been edited at all!
*Btw Veruca Salt is a spoiled kid that gets everything she wants, from Charlie and the chocolate factory.
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Your eyes glared down at the younger boy, towering over him to show dominance "S-sis, what're you doing?" Karl asked "Trying to scare you, is it working?" you leaned down and kept eye contact with the stammering boy "u-um not really.." he stuttered out "then why're you stuttering over your words? You're obviously intimidated." you placed your hands on your hips.
"Well why're you trying to intimidate me? I'm just trying to read this book!" he groaned "Because someone has to knock you down a peg, you think just because you're younger that you can get everything you want? Well not if I can help it!" you were furious by the boy.
"What're you on about? What've I done to you?" Karl asked worriedly "You've been asking for a whole lot this week, veruca salt!" you threw your arms in the air and started pacing around him and his chair "What? Like what?" Karl was utterly confused "You've been asking for non-stop rides to your friends houses, and you've been leaving your laundry around for mother to do!" you cross your arms.
"You're overreacting!" Karl complained "Oh I'm not done! You've also been taking money from mom's purse!" you called him out "What- how did you know about that??" Karl immediately became tense "Oh you look so stressed dear brother, just relax- don't worry... I'm not gonna tell her-" Karl sighed in relief "Oh thank god" and got cut off by you finishing your sentence "-If you promise to be a good brother and listen to what your stepsister says!" you finished.
"WHAT? No way! I'm telling mom and dad!" He began to stand up but you pushed him back down "Oh no no no, you're gonna tell them what? That you stole the $200 that mom presumed was stolen by a thief? You gonna explain that to her after she already called authorities and had someone sent to jail?" you spat venom at him.
"You're evil!" Karl shouted "Me? Evil? I'm not the thief here" you grinned mischievously "Although I could be- if you don't wanna have to do everything I say then just give me something precious you own" you held your hand out expectantly "What am I supposed to give you? My soul?" Karl questioned "If you can bare to part with it then yes" you gave a mean smile in response to his sarcasm.
"I have literally nothing!" Karl exclaimed "You have your phone" you suggested "Dad would kill me if he found out I'd given it away!" He shouted "he'd kill you if he found out about that money too" you reminded him "I- I could give you... I'll let you date one of my friends!" Karl smiled nervously as he hoped you'd agree "What friends? You're a nerd, no one would want to be friends with you" snickered.
"S-Sapnap! He's strong, he loves animals, he has big muscles!" Karl said "The brute with dark hair? He's cute but not my type" you yawned "U-m.. Quackity?" a bead of sweat dropped down his face "He's super cool, really funny!" Karl was starting to worry as he was already running out of friends to pair you with "No.. My type is nerdy boys that I can dominate, ones that get nervous a lot and stutter over their sentences" you hinted.
"Oh- like Wilbur? I'm not really his friend but I can try something!!" Karl wasn't getting the hint "No, I was thinking more specifically towards someone like you." you finally told him "M-me? But I'm your brother!" Karl was in disbelief "Step-brother. And I don't really like you, I just think that you're pitiful and if you're gonna be selling someone's body to me in exchange to keep your secrets safe than it may as well be yours." you explained.
"But- Well- I've never done that before!" he put his hands up defensively "Well obviously, who would want to touch a greasy nerd like you?" you sighed. "Well- No, that's wrong!" he shook his head "Well I'm not gonna make you, just give me something else then and I'll be on my way" you told him. Karl looked down at his feet for a moment as he mulled over what was happening and what decision he was gonna make.
Karl lifted his head and made eye contact with you "Okay." he replied "Okay what? Okay you're gonna give me something?" you asked "No- I mean- okay I'm gonna give you my body" he mumbled quietly "Gonna need to speak up, can't hear you over the sound of our parents crying over having such a disappointing child" you ridiculed him.
"I'll give you my body, damnit!" he yelled "hey- quiet down, our parents are only just down stairs!" you made him shut up. "Whatever" he leaned back in his chair and slumped down "Karl. You need to give me your full consent, you can't just go 'yea whatever' and expect me to be fine with that!" you furrowed your eyebrows "Why?? What- do you need me to beg you for it?!" he was getting aggravated.
"Actually yes, I do" you decided to torment him a little bit "Big sis, please please please fuck this desperate loser" he put his hands together to make a praying gesture as he mocked you "That's more like it, runt." you grabbed his chin and forced him to face you "We can stop at any time, if you choose not to speak up then that'll be your fault" you made sure he was fully aware that he had a say even though he wasn't in control.
"Thanks. Now- how do we?" Karl was now confused on what you were gonna do, and he was having some type of delusion that he was gonna be the one in charge dominating you. "I think I'm just gonna have some fun by jerking you off, is that okay bunny?" you teased "W-what do you mean you're gonna jerk me off?" Karl asked nervously "I'm gonna stroke your dick, never done that before?" you bullied him.
"N-no, never even thought about it.." his face became red and flushed, you slowly slid onto his lap and straddled his leg "No? You haven't? Are you lying to your big sister? That's not very nice you know, Mom always told me that you shouldn't lie (Unless it's to your dad) " Karl glanced away from you and tried to hide his face "Aw you can tell me the truth, I'm a good listener after all!" you encouraged him "I haven't.." he persisted.
"Well then let me introduce you to the pleasure that is being jerked off, slide your pants down" you instructed "What? Do I have to.." he was clearly embarrassed "No. I guess I could just palm you through your pants" you shrugged. Karl sighed in relief and let out a small breath, tilting his head back in the chair and waiting for you to do what you wanted.
Your hand dipped between his legs, your palm rubbing his growing bulge "H-Hey that feels weird" he told you "So what? You want me to stop?" he shut his mouth, encouraging you to keep palming him. "This would feel a lot better if you let your cock free, instead your trapping it in your tight pants and strangling it.." you frowned "F-fine.." Karl blushed as he slowly pulled his pants down.
You watched in delight as he released his penis "Oh is this what you were worried about?" you stared down at it "O-Oh god-" Karl felt humiliated and went to put it away but you stopped him "It's cute.. I wouldn't expect a nerd's penis to be big anyways" you told him. Karl's little cock twitched at your words, moving slightly on its own "oh. my. god. You LIKE when I'm mean to you! That's why you never argue back! It all makes sense now.." Karl looked down to avert eye contact.
"That's perfect Karl, you love when I'm mean to you- and I love to make fun of you! Win Win!" you felt a small rush of excitement. Your hand wrapped around his cock which forced a choked out moan from him, his hands moving to cover his face "you're acting quite rude Karl. Look at your big sister when she's talking to you!" you ordered.
Karl slowly revealed his face, revealing how much pleasure he was having. "F-Feel's weird, let go!" he ushered you to let go of his penis, even though his body disagreed; his hips bucking up into your hand to help finish him off "Trust your big sister." you said as you continued to pump your hand around his cock. "Fuck! Fuck you!" Karl's whole body shuddered as he was having an orgasm, his penis twitching in your hand.
"Wow Karl, that was rude." you huffed and narrowed your eyes, your hand still lingering on his crotch "A-are you done now?" Karl panted as he was trying to catch his breath "Done? I've barely even started!" you laughed maniacally as you began to slowly stroke him again "Ah- no no no, that's too much!" Karl whined. "You want me to stop?" you asked him "Yes!" he exclaimed so you let go and pulled away "What?" Karl was confused and a bit upset "Hm? What is it?" you asked "You're just.. done?" he looked saddened.
"You told me to stop!" you explained "yeah but.. I didn't really mean it.." Karl's cheeks were dusted red "Well come back here then" you grabbed his hips and forced him back down onto his chair. Karl was already eager and bucking his hips up against you, your hand grabbed him again and started to jerk him off "Ah!- Ah-" Karl tried to keep quiet but couldn't help the escaped noises that came out.
You placed your free hand over his mouth to try and muffle his moans, his voice vibrating against your hand "You can never be quiet! Always have something to say, don't you?" you rolled your eyes at him. Karl clenched his eyes shut and tapped the chair repeatedly with his hand to let you know he was ready to cum again, you let him release his load yet again but you didn't remove your hand.
"A-Again?? I can only take so much.." Karl whimpered and whined "You're feeling this way already? But I've only just started!" You frowned "Well I guess I can give you a break now but there won't be any breaks later on when our parents go out to dinner." you stood up and got off him. "T-Thanks.." Karl huffed "For what?" you asked "Thanks for um- pleasuring me?" you scoffed and walked back to your room, ready to return at night time when you had Karl all to yourself.
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*guys lemme know if u want a part 2 bc I could certainly make one of the reader x karl at night time after their parents have left.
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cinnamonest · 3 years
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Alright, so I'm thinking maybe Xiao would also be really really into a person that shows him some maternal affection. Like maybe a gentle god that saved him from his evil master. God!Reader saw a poor leetle boy, all chained up, that's so cruel :(. She just cradles him and takes care of him till he's a big strong man. Since reader is a gentle god, obviously she would treat everyone she meets with kindness. Oh, but Xiao does not like that one bit! Filthy little humans thinking they deserve the kindness from his mommy god?
Xiao would be blinded with the knowledge that he's just protecting his savior (momwife) from being defiled by humans, just like what happened to him when she rescued him from the evil god. He would force her to stay with him, guilty tripping you that, "Oh no, my karmic corruption. I sure hope I don't die while you're away. If I do, it will be all your fault." Despite his obvious strength, reader chooses to stay, because she's nice like that :). If she still decides to leave however, wouldn't you just be a good little wife goddess, chained up on a bed for him to fuck for eternity. It's funny really, you saved him and got rid of the chains that held him captive, now you're the one captive with chains that he put on you himself.
Goddess darling trying to reason with him and begging, doesn't he remember how awful it was? What it was like to be chained up, enslaved, stripped of autonomy? Why would he do the same to her when he knows what that's like? If he truly loves her, wouldn't he set her free?
It actually hurts his feelings, he pouts and furrows his eyebrows because... Are... Are you really comparing those two things? Are you comparing him to the god that enslaved him? How could you say something like that? This is different... This is because he loves you. And he's not cruel to you... Not like the god was to him. He takes care of you, he feeds you, cuddles you, fucks you... Those are all the basic needs, right? You're not human, you don't need sunlight exposure to be healthy. And social interaction... You get that with him. He knows it's probably lonely when you're all by yourself... But he makes up for it when he comes home and talks to you. He's not the same...
He's not forcing you into doing his will, doing things you don't want to. Except for sex sometimes. Because he loves you so much and you make him feel so good and if you just let him do what he wants, you'll feel good too.
And he'd never hurt you... Except when you try to leave, or you make him really really mad. But again, it's because he loves you, not to be cruel. And well, the whole karmic transfer hurts when you begin to suffer the pain of his condition due to his proximity transferring it to you, but he holds you the whole time during those episodes and murmurs in your ear that you'll be okay.
And you'll never feel all alone, like no one in the world cares for you, like he felt back then. No, you won't feel alone even if you want to. You have him to sleep by your side and nuzzle up to you all the time.
But yeah for goddess darling not even the thought of eventually growing old and dying can help you, you're immortal like him, you're trapped forever. Literally with him and only him for eternity. I mean, a normal human mind breaks in what, a year? The most stubborn humans maybe two or three? How far gone, then, will you be a hundred years from now? Three hundred? A millenium? Nothing but him as your only interaction... And for an immortal like him (even a very impatient one like him), a few years won't feel like too long.
Still, that comparison really hurts his feelings. He gets all hurty and pouts until you comfort him. Preferably with a nice hug with his face buried in your chest.
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oh-for-fic-sake · 3 years
Text
Their Alright... For A Boomer
Masterlist
Summary: Being a girl with a larger chest always got you attention, maybe having your nipples pierced to try and fell more confident handt been the best idea, but how can you regret it when your latest client; the sexy Mr Cavill  was ogling them but could this end up being more then just that one time you were eyed by a hot celebrity?
Warnings: Suggestive, No Smut, Fluffy? Cute and funny, Swearing
A/N: this was a request from @fanficlover91​ i hope you like this hun, i tried to keep it hot but sweet and respectful? Which was a struggle but i hope i got the vibe you wanted. And as always i hope you all enjoy.
Taglist: In Reblogs.
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You blushed as you looked down the lense at your model. He smirked sweeping his eyes over you non to subtly. You could feel the blues penetrating you with a hot stare. The was the distinctive fast clicks on you camera snapping a burst of shots managing to capture his smirking face and eyes sweeping over your form appreciatively.
You stood tall and smiled pulling away double checking the shoots. You bit your lip. Fucking hell this was both the best and worst job you had. Henry Cavill was the most enticing male you'd ever had the pleasure to photograph. He didn't even have a good side, every side was good! There wasn't an unflattering angle on the man!
"And that's a wrap? I think we have everything we need Mr Cavill" you said professionally making to move away from him and begin to swap sd cards and label them before packing away. Henry gawfed and rose quickly panicked almost.
"I- err no! Wait I was... Well hoping that I could have some more done?" he said chaseing you across the small studio you could hear his agent Leah scoff from the side lines. You frowned and looked to her nervously. The woman had been watching and tutting, scoffing and clicking her tongue through the whole session. It actually made you nervous, wasn't she pleased with the shoot? You were worried, being freelance this was your first time doing a celebrity shoot for a magazine but the usual photographer was in hospital having a stroke a few days prior and you were the only free photographer in the agency that was close enough to take the job. Sure you wasn't well known but still it was a little disheartening to have someone seemingly unimpressed with your work.
But it was when you eyed her you saw she wasn't giving you the evil eye. Her frown was directed at henry, a scolding look you'd give a misbehaving child. You frowned a little puzzled, but shook it off in favour of looking to Henry. Your actual client.
"More? I... I? Thought the piece only needed a few to choose from? They were very ah... How do I put it? Thorough? With the brief" you explained hoping Leah would step in and clarify just what was going on. Because you didn't have a clue.
"I yes but- I'd love to top up my portfolio? You know? I err yeah have a few changes going on and... I mean a few greys and such... Just want to update it a tad... I'll pay obviously- I'd pay anything for more time please?" he pleaded watching you closely eyes wide and bright full of hope.
"I... Err" you shifted swapping your camera from one hand to the other and craned your head around the man trying to spy his agent. But you had no hope of peeking around this gargantuan man. Just like with the camera he demanded your full attention.
"And for Instagram and stuff! There's only so much I can do in a selfie... I'd even recommend you- advertise your work!" he quickly added sounding desperate now. It would help you out if you did have a few shots of him for in your own catalogue. It shouldn't matter but having a celeb under your belt was actually a good thing. It meant you'd acted professionally and been good to work with.
"I suppose so, I do have a few extra sd's here... Tell you what I'll do another shoot for you as long as I can pick a few to put in my portfolio? Then we both update our files?" you nodded to him speaking slowly. He grinned and relaxed nodding quickly pleased with himself for wrangling more shots. You'd never know he was just glad to has more time with you.
"Oh yes absolutly! That's fine here should we get started now or?" he asked biting his lip trying not to stare at you for too long. But it was hard you were fucking stunning!
"Oh yeah sure iv got time, let me just sort these out and set up, need to switch, you've tired my poor camera" you said with a grin trying to ignore the man as he beamed at you looking excited nodding enthusiastically. You backed up and spun around trying not to blush as you felt henry gazing openly at you.
"Right well if the magazine ones are done I will be off then" Leah called packing up her bag with a small chuckle to herself. You froze and spun quickly seeing her seemingly abandoning you with Henry.
"Wha- oh you don't have to you can stay-" you tried to reason unsure why, I mean who wouldn't want to be alone with this huge glorious man? Maybe you just didn't trust yourself with him? He had been 'making love' to the camera all afternoon. Smouldering bedroom eyes that was making it hard to focus. You had been getting hot under the collar all day as you kidded yourself he was eyeing you, not the camera or would be readers.
It didn't help that you had caught him oogling your breasts earlier. But you wasn't mad, it was your own fault. It was the Hight of summer and you had on a string vest with a thin bra, that you could clearly see your nipple bars through. You didn't feel uncomfortable or anything, you didn't blame Henry for looking. You cant exactly ignore your tits.. The were pretty large for your frame. You were curvy but they were as one ex put it 'exceptional'. And besides he had looked not touched and he hadn't been a creep about it. In fact he had done a double take and then blushed when he realised he had been caught looking. But as you said you get that with big boobs, you'd had it your entire life, it was actually one of the reasons you'd got them pierced. It helped with your confidence and you convince yourself that they were looking at the bars. Not you per say.  
"Okay aunt Leah I will see you in a few days." henry interrupted you quickly smiling practically ushering the woman out the door. He moved fast ever picking the womans phone and juice bottle to help her leave quicker.
"Yes, behave Henry I'll see you soon" she said with a giggle before calling a thank you and goodbye over her shoulder at you. You swallowed nervously and gave a quick bye as the door clicked behind her and you were left alone with Henry. The man groaned stretching as he spun around a huge grin on his face, making your knees tremble a little. Fuck.
Henry came over and watched you closely as you scribbled the name and date along with the publication name on the sd case label. You tried not to notice as he hovered biting his lip then took off the blazer and threw it on the table beside you drawing your attention as he did grunting a little. The v neck letting the smallest amount of soft looking chest fuzz that had been teasing you all day. He grinned slyly as he caught you eyeing him and crossed his arms over his chest flexing for your benefit. You gasped and quickly looked back to the camera in your hands inserting a new scarf into the new fully charges camera.
"Soo how do you like this kind of work?" henry said casually trying not to seem like a creeper but god damnit he couldn't stop eyeing you. If he had known how sexy you'd be he would have demanded to be doing a bloody swim wear shoot!
"You mean people?" you stuttered trying not to look him in the eye. Not that it helped because the rest of him was just as fucking sexy! You quivered all over desperately trying to remember how to breath, yet didn't want to draw in too deep a breath and make your tits bounce for him and look like a slut. There was a very fine line for a big busted girl, to much wobble will make you look like your trying to get attention.
"I mean celebrities, magazines we were told you mainly do private shoots for events and model portfolios" he offered leaning forward as he leant back on the desk next to you hooking one ankle behind the other. The way he stood placed his crotch in your line of sight as you looked down and worked on setting up the camera. You flushed. Oh god he looked er... Bigger then you'd thought earlier, not that you were looking but... Well you couldn't help notice the package! The man was a fucking serial man spreader! And that thing was huge! With the muscles he was packing he could probably bench press you with his crotch!
"Oh well its different... And you sir popped my celebrity cherry" you froze on the spot as you said that, it had meant to be an ice breaker, a joke but instead had sounded fucking creepy!. You snapped up to him making to apologize as your face flamed mortified but he had thrown his head back laughing. The deep rumble sent chilled down your spine.
"Well I'm honoured to have popped your cherry~" he teased placing a hand over his heart with a cheeky grin making you blush and nod then turned to him with the new camera all set up.
"Soo where do we start?" you said moving on quickly looking up at him trying to forget the whole cherry comment.
"Where ever you want me, i will let you take the reigns command me as you will" he chuckled standing tall once more and looked about the room casually to the various small set ups, different furniture, seats sofas and mini tables dotting the space.
"I... Okay then you said Instagram? How about we start with some facials-FACE SHOTS! Face. Shots. Not facials fuck. Shit" you quickly tried repairing the damage whist cursing yourself wanting nothing more then to be swallowed up by the floor.
"No, no love facials sounded perfect~" he said winking before gliding past you making you stutter and almost choke on your breath. Oh good lord this was a bad idea. You followed as he sat down on a sturdy sofa and looked head on at you and bit his lip once again watching you with a sultry look.
And that was the beginning. You followed him about taking various snaps whislt having small talk. He seemed to be very flirtatious as he spoke, dropping lines and compliments as he made eyes at you. You flushed each time clamming up at his suggestive comments. And rightly or wrongly you flirted back trying to seem cool and suave. But inside you were fangirling unable to belive you were here with this incredibly gorgeous man teasing one another. On a few occasions he even growled as you scampered about him, crouching and taking shots from blow getting some delicious angles that dampened your knickers. Then in between all this he managed to get little tied bits. You'd told him you were on agency freelance and were trying to get into the social media platform as it seemed easier in this day and age rather then to be in fashion photography. You wanted to be commercial not private but no one would really take a chance anymore.
Then you suggested a few shots on the sofa laying back trying to think of something different for your portfolio, maybe a body length shot. He was quick to agree and dived onto the sofa saying he had an idea you swallowed nodding not fully trusting the look in his eyes. But that was forgotten as he relaxed stretching out over the sofa legs crossed and resting on the arm of his hands behind his head and a devilish smirk looking down the lenght of his body. You knelt at his feet trying to get a flattering image of him looking down but cursed as the camera wasn't playing ball. The lense was focusing, this was why you used the other one first, the camera had a few issues and was temperamental.
"What's wrong?" he asked frowning a little at you as you growled pulling the camera away fro your face and began trying to manually focus the lense.
"Oh its.. It wont focus.. It does this sometime, really need to throw it out but.. She was my first I'm sentimental" you said feeling silly as you battled with the camera.
"We all are with our firsts... How about you come closer instead, I really want to see this shot, never done one at this angle.. Out of all my shoots your the first to suggest this~" you froze and looked to him but he just smiled impishly at you. Slowly you rounded the sofa and leant over him positioning the camera at his stomach as he looked right into the lense giving you a definite bedroom eyes, half lidded and burning. Both dreamy and amazingly sexy. It was as if he could see you beyond the lense, as if it wasn't even there!
"You can come closer love, I wont bite, not if you don't want me to~" his voice was low and teasing, luring you in like a siren. You trembled and moved along him but he tutted and moved a hand to your hip and pressed, coaxing you onto the sofa and sat you on him making you straddle him. You gasped squeazing your camera tighter as he moved you easily, warm palms holding you both delicatly and firmly. You could see in his eyes he was weary unsure if he had gone to far but you squeezed him between your thighs and relaxed making him grin up at you getting the message you didn't mind at all. You aimed the lense at him once more and got the shots you wanted.
"Perfect! Mr Cavill" you said actually a little sad that this session was over. It had been nice playing this little cat and mouse game with him. But all good things come to an end.
"Ah now i have a policy love, when a womans on top they can call me henry, among other things~" he said smoothly laughing as you chuckled nervously fiddling with the camera in your hands and shifted over him a little.
"I will try to remember that for next time boomer~" you teased managing to overcome your nerves as you pulled away the camera with a giggle winking at him as he stuttered. For a second you thought you'd gone too far but a quirk to his lips made you relax once more.
"That hurt, that was hurtful" he teased pouting not releasing you from his lap, instead holding you tighter, fingers digging into your sides making you gasp and bit your lip as he pulled you to his crotch and ground into you teasingly.
"I'm so sorry~" you uttered breathless trying to keep yourself together. But this man was something else, like a drug- the devil all fanged smiles and smooth words. God you were fucked, you knew this man could do anything to you and youd thank him for it~
"I doubt that" he cooed and slid his hand higher growing more and more confident. The last few hours of casual flirting had built up his appitite. There was no misconceptions, you wanted him as much as he wanted you.
"Oh yeah?" you said coyly tipping your head to him playing along willing for this to happen, whether it be a one of fuck or something longer. You didnt have any complaints~ this was your body and youd enjoy it with who ever you wanted to!
"Yeah prove it!" he hissed and moved quickly sitting up and swinging around planting his feet on the floor. You yelped as he moved surprizingly fast and managed to keep you in his lap now face to face with you eyes roaming your face settling on your lips.
"And how should i do that" you teased tilting your head skimming your lips with his as you spoke. He groaned and held you tighter making you whine breathlessly willing this to happen. You wanted him and you wont deny yourself the chance.
"Make and old mans day" he said plainly and leant back resting on the back of the sofa, you watched him closely and brought your hands to his shoulders prodding at the neck of the t shirt and drew your fingers down slowly feeling him shiver at the light skimming fingertips.
"Oh really Boomer? And how would i make and old mans day?" you teased once more making him grunt but he quickly caught himself as your fingers smoothed over the teasing curls that peeked over his top. You scratched over them lightly with your nails making him draw a needy breath and chuckled at him. He was sexy and cute~
"By accepting a job offer?" he said before smileing smugly as you paused and frowned. Had you missed something? Was he after a freebee?
"Job offer? Really another shoot?" you snorted suddenly not feeling sexy, more like he was trying to butter you up for some fuck for parts shoots or something. He sighed and began speaking before you could get yourself all twisted. But then again you could have taken his offer wrong.
"Manage my social media. I have many companies and brands reach out to me for endorsements. They want me caught wearing their brands. But I'm to busy most of the time I cant make it to the locations they want. It actually doesn't seem worth it most of the time, with cost of flights and time lost travelling to and from studios itd be easier if I had my own personal photographer that travelled with me its be easy, slip on the clothes and what not take a few snaps and then you touch them up and post them on my social media." he explained watching as it sunk in that he wasnt trying to pull a fast one. Well he was but not trying to fuck you over... Just fuck you... And keep you because you were fantastic and he wants nothing more then to have you around hime as much as possible. In the single dat he had spent working with you, you had enchanted him, not only were you sexy but you were good at your job and easy to work with but also funny and cute and he needed to get to know you.
"Of course its a very big venture and we'd have to have a few dinner and lunch dates to work out all the nitty gritty" he added after a few beats of silence trying to make it clear he was interested... Very interested~ it worked as you fluched and a playfull look donned your face your fingers began stoking his chest hair once more. He relaxed shuddering under the nails as they teased his curls.
"Is this a big ploy to get a date Boomer?" you purred his new nick name making him groan when you squeezed him between your thick thighs once more grinding on him and the considerable bulge below you that twitched.
"No... Maybe is it working?" he said quickly hissing at you shifted in his lap once more, his hands snapping to your hips trying to still you before he came undone in his boxers. You were a very dangerous woman and something told him you knew.
"Well it sounds like an offer I'd be very, very interested in taking further~" you clarified giggling when he swallowed dryly and eyed you surprized that his plan had seemed  to work.
"Good to hear~ so got anything planned after this?" he asked feeling a wave of confidence at the prospect of snagging a date with you. He hadn't meant to sound so eager but... He was eager and that was that.
"Yes" you said with a straight face and got up off of him spinning around heading to the table with your camera bags. You gave him a glance and giggled seeing him still sitting there gobsmacked legs wide open and his crotch that was now definitely bigger then it had been earlier.
"O-oh" he stuttered seemingly unsure how to proceed. You giggled as he fumbled over his words. Then decided to grant him some mercy and began speaking whilst popping out the sd card from the camera labeling it like the previous one.
"You see I had a very cheeky client today who asked for a shoot last mineut. But I wasn't to bothered he was very very sexy even if he was a boomer, but get this out of nowhere gave me a job offer? And we're having dinner- he promised pizza~" you giggled glancing at Henry as he slumped in the seat realising halfway through that you were talking about him. He smoothed his hands over his face and jumped up coming over to you shaking his head.
"You know I'm not actually a boomer?" he quipped folding his arms. You rolled your eyes at him as you packed your stuff away making sure to recheck everything.
"Have you seen your selfies? Your a boomer, boomer" you teased making him scoff but laugh at the name that has now stuck.
"Wait you've seen my selfies? What do you think?" he asked wanting feedback on the silly shots he took. You paused halfway through zipping up your bag and turned facing him fully giving him a thoughtful look then shrugged
"Their alright... For a boomer" you giggled when he preened for a second then his face dropped into a pout when you finished the comment.
"I repeat...That was hurtful" he said covering his heart with a kicked puppy look making you laugh and hoist your bags over your shoulder and make for the door with him hot on your heels.
"Its fine boomer a second date will make up for it I'm sure~" you sniggered at him playfully looking back at him as he followed you out of the door.
"A date for each time you call me boomer? Deal" he quipped walking along side you offering you his arm like a true gentleman unlike the teasing horny little shit he had been all day. Not that you minded either. Gentleman on the streets, freak in the sheets and all that jazz.
"God we may aswell marry now then boomer" he laughed nodding in agreement the banter from the day still in play as you both left the building.
"Seems so, I mean were at ten that's what the kids consider boyfriend girlfreind territory" he anounced with a sigh playing on the 'boomer' joke making you giggle and roll your eyes as he mentioned the tally. Then you frowned and quickly counted your 'boomers' and opened your mouth you correct him, arguing that ten was incorrect.
"I think its nine boomer- ah see what you did their sneaky boomer!" you cried pushing him playfully at his little trick. He roared with laughter and quickly tangled his fingers with yours dragging you back alongside him guiding you down the street towards a place he knew served pizza, he didn't remember but apparantly he promised pizza...
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sketch--booked · 3 years
Text
I wanna complain about how the ninja treated Zane in the first few episodes real quick. Specifically in Home. Since I have some beef with the ninja.
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So remember that one time Zane froze the entire monastery without effort? Yeah, that was kinda cool,
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Now I begin to get angry, You’ve been warned--
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And the ninja, understandably, were upset and I can get that.
But then you see how they all kinda just--- treated him really badly all the time. I get it,, he’s got weird traits and does very “Zane” things (being unfazed to be in the bathroom with somebody, legitimately not understanding comedy and laughing at odd things, at least Nya and Jay weren’t watching a horror or slasher movie, and his famous sitting-in-the-fridge scene) but like--
They really gonna do this??
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Laugh at the guy for what he wears and throw around the food he made for them? Even Wu, may I add.
Can I also call attention to Jay, who throws something at Zane.
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AND LOOK AT HIM--
That is not a face of comfort? By any means?? Zane shows a very little range of emotion, in the early seasons especially. But when Jay throws his own food at him, he frowns. THAT’S EMOTION,, HE’S NOT HAPPY,,, THIS ISN’T A JOKE NOR IS IT FUNNY TO HIM.
And they just--Don’t even do a double-take.
I’m bewildered at just how horribly they treat him, in this scene specifically. Not one of them, NOT EVEN WU, takes a second to think about how Zane might feel in this moment??? IN FACT, If you listen carefully, you can hear Nya and Jay belittling him.
“He looks so cute in his apron!” and “Look at his face!”
THEY ACKNOWLEDGE THEY’RE BEING CRUEL LIKE WTF THIS MAKES ME SO MAD--I HOPE THEY WENT TO BED STARVING.
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So after this god awful display of friendship that makes me want to slap all the other ninja, we get the infamous Falcon scene.
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Zane has his general neutral kinda-angy-lookin’ expression. So we can’t really tell what he’s feeling in this moment, but it’s his actions that follow that say everything.
He sees the falcon and is intrigued by it and actually smiles. Which is good! That’s emotion! Well done, Zane, you’re learning!
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NOW IT’S THIS BIT---IS WHERE I GET REAL JUST---HHHHHMMM It’s in this moment, I wonder if Zane knows what a toxic friendship isghghgh I jest--
Zane is smiling when he sees the falcon fly off. He likes the bird but he lets it leave.
But then---
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Zane takes one brief look back to the sound of his friends and without a second doubt he BOOKS IT--
So from initially seeing this, you get the instant feeling that he would prefer to follow a mysterious bird into possible danger, than go back to his friends who are still laughing in the distance. He obviously was going to return back to them, they tease his lack of returning later in the episode WHICH I HOPE TO GET TO. But that does say enough about his actual feelings towards the rest. 
Strange, possibly evil bird---or my friends who’re probably going to continue to laugh at me.
It’s a nobrainer that he’d follow the bird??
He’s not truly upset at them, I don’t even think that Zane has the capability to really be angry ngl,, but he still chose the bird over his “family” and that’s what makes me so angry at the ninja. 
And to those who say “He’s not upset at the ninja, he’s just curious and the fact that he essentially ran away from them, doesn’t mean he dislikes them” I say,,, That is fair. And I will, for the sake of not looking like a dick, argue for that.
It’s clear that Zane likes to know stuff. In the beginning, he’s been the smart one. Even in this episode Kai says “We like the guy, he’s really smart..” then complains about him being weird. And later down the line he’s shown an interest in learning, being the only one in season 11 to actually read about the desert of doom and the Mechanic himself saying he’s an inquisitive nindroid in season 12.
So it’s understandable if Zane was simply sating his curiosity. But how can you tell me that the previous event was not a deciding factor in choosing the bird instead..
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I would now like to jump forward to when the ninja are at Lloyd’s tree-house (Can I point out that the first place the falcon took zane, was a tree-house. And the last was a tree house?? Anybody? okay just me--). 
And when they ask him how he found it; he tells them it’s because it danced. Jay then jokingly asks if it was a coo-coo bird, promoting everyone to--
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IF YOU GUESSED “laugh at him” YOU’D BE CORRECT, HOW DID YOU GUESS???
When he does his info dump thing they don’t even bother, they just shrug in unison--which ngl I do find funny ghghgh
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Now that’s where you’d think the Zane bullying stops right?
NOPE,, TIME TO BURN DOWN THE MONASTERY (this is a cool shot btw)
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This is a good shot too, because it sets up that Zane will be a focus, and you can already assume it’s because, in some essence, this is Zane’s fault.
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But then they go all out on him. They straight up tell him this was his fault, that he shouldn’t have followed the bird, he shouldn’t have been curious or try to help, that everything they had here is gone, and yell at him to his face “A teaching moment? What’s wrong with you? Don’t you get it? Everything is gone!” and it’s because of him.
In this moment they are taking out every frustration they had with him. They’re taking out every moment he’s gone into his own world and making their lives harder and that their home is gone because of him.
This is one of the very first, and very few times all the ninja have pitted against just one of their team. And it hurts. Because Zane’s reaction to this, his response to being treated horribly, having his food thrown at him like he didn’t spend likely hours making and planing it, like he doesn’t do the chores they probably wont do (taking out the rubbish earlier in the episode), is to go back to them like he wasn’t hurt by this at all. 
And y’know what could’ve solved this entire thing? What could’ve prevented the exclusion and the explosion that is their friendship. Communication. On both sides, neither of them communicated with each other. The ninja didn’t openly express their feelings towards Zane TO Zane, only Wu and probably Nya. And Zane never expressed anything, ever, like--literally nothing. His moment of most emotion is in episode 7 dammit.
And I just--This is an issue that’s followed through even to the new seasons. Honest to god some of the only times I can recall him actually expressing how he feels about something, is with Pixal, and when Kai persuades him to break his morals and cheat in the slug race. God please help me find more examples because I cannot remember anything else (I’m ignoring Decoded for the time being since the last episode of that was almost entirely “Zane therapy time”)
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Imma end it here because my rant juices have stopped flowing and I haven’t slept in many many long hours and I really would like to collapse right about now.
So i’m not saying Zane has it worst, he probably doesn’t,, but what I’m saying is that Zane had a tough time in the beginning especially. After Kai became properly a part of the group, it was Zane that they outcasted. And because they wouldn’t actually talk to him about what they all thought. They didn’t take the time to understand him and only realized they missed him and how badly they’d been treating him when he was gone.
In the start, they were bad friends, they were horrible in fact. Zane tried, or didn’t. Where he didn’t understand people or social cues, he understood being kind and doing the right thing. 
The ninja did however work from this. As of this episode, they tone down the mistreatment and make a bigger effort to get the guy. And it’s all explained and finished in episode 7.
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Overall, I really like this episode! I think the characters were great! I think the humor was great! I think the progression was great! I dunno why some o’ yall think I don’t like something because I hate it. I can hate-love something, and you’ll find there are a lot of things I hate-love in ninjago.
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alirhi · 3 years
Text
...goddess help me...
This fucking episode. *deep breath* This... This episode is where I'm expecting to get some serious hate. Let me just get this out of the way right up front:
I. Hate. Zemo.
I do not find him sympathetic, or funny, or charming. I find him creepy and annoying. I did not like him in CA:CW and I do not like him in TFATWS. If you are pro-Zemo, you are not going to like my version of this show from here on out. Just find something else to read and don't bother me about it. You've got the actual canon, so go enjoy that.
Got it? Good. Now, on to the main event!
Episode 3: The Power Broker
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First of all, Sam doesn't let Bucky walk in there alone. No matter Bucky's (flimsy and nonsensical) argument, Sam's like "hell no. I go in with you, or you don't go in." The main reason for this isn't to keep Bucky from breaking Zemo out of prison (with decent writing, he would never do that) - it's so that Sam witnesses Zemo taunting Bucky with/about the trigger words. because Zemo is a piece of shit.
Since he doesn't know the full story, Sam is confused, but he files this interaction away to ask Bucky about later. He's listening to Zemo acknowledging that Bucky was "not conscious for most of [his] imprisonment" (which, yes, clearly refers to the time he spent frozen, but can also mean while he was under their control as TWS/"The Asset" - also, key word: imprisonment) and when he calls Bucky a means to an end, Sam scowls, looking ready to go off on him, but he waits. They've got more important issues.
Neither of them entertains the thought of breaking Zemo out for even a nanosecond. He does that shit himself. And literally the only reason I'm sticking with him getting out at all is because I want to address some truly egregious moments linked directly to him in the show. Zemo makes them think he's setting them on the trail when really he's just sending them to his motor pool. Bucky and Sam are confused until they see Zemo in his stolen guard uniform, then they're both angry and want to ship him right back to prison, but he strikes a deal with them: "My help for my temporary freedom. Creating super soldiers cannot be allowed to continue; let me finish my work, and then do with me as you will." He has no intention of going quietly back to prison, obviously, and they're not stupid enough to believe otherwise, but they believe they can keep him on a short leash, so they agree for now. Anything to bring down the Flag Smashers and whoever created them.
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After the title, we cut to Raynor on the phone in her office. She's agitated, fiddling with things on her desk. "No, sir," she's practically growling, "it was disrupted. - Walker did! - It's not my fault your new attack dog got off-leash!" She pauses, huffs, and says more calmly, "No. Of course not. I'm sorry. - Well, I don't see how, with the new Cap strutting around barking orders! - What am I supposed to do? Tell Captain America in front of a dozen witnesses that he can't have his predecessor's favorite pet because we're not done reprogramming him? I didn't see that going over too well. I made a call. - No. No, no, no, we can still use him. The work's not finished, but he still trusts me. He'll be back." A pause as she listens. Angry again, she snaps, "What do you want me to do, shove a tracker up his ass? He'll be back, and we'll pick right back up where we left off! - Don't worry, sir, the Asset will be fully compliant and ready to use soon. I'll make sure of it. - Yes, sir. You, too." She hangs up and tosses her phone on the couch, grumbling, "Dick."
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Cut back to Sam, Bucky, and Zemo getting going on their trip to Madripoor. On the plane, Sam wants to talk to Bucky about what he's learned so far, but doesn't want to bring it up in front of Zemo... until the notebook incident reminds him that Zemo already knows more about Bucky than he does.
After Zemo's line about the list, Sam angrily corrects him: "You mean people HYDRA used The Winter Soldier to hurt." When Zemo shrugs and his response is basically along the lines of "what's the difference" Sam is like "oh hell no."
"Those words you were reciting at him," he reminds Zemo, "what were they, Russian? They clearly meant something. They were supposed to do something. What are they?" "Sam, let it go," Bucky pleads, unable to look at either of them. "It's nothing." "You wanna drown in your guilt, that's fine," Sam snaps, "but make sure it's for the right reasons." He turns back to Zemo, who's smiling at this exchange because he's a monster and thinks Bucky's suffering is fucking funny. "I asked you a question, Zemo. What did those words do?" "They activate the Winter Soldier programming," Bucky grudgingly admits. He doesn't want to talk about it, but he's sure as hell not going to let Zemo speak for him. "Or, they did, before the Wakandans got all that shit out of my head." "It's a shame," Zemo says with a smirk. "Imagine the possibilities that come with perfect obedience." "I think you mean 'slavery'," Sam growls, "and I think you're in the wrong crowd to be looking so pleased about it. Remember that we can send your ass back to prison any time." "Of course," Zemo agrees, but with an arrogant smile that shows he doesn't believe for a second that these two have any real power over him. Still, he bides his time and sits back quietly, watching Bucky fidget with the notebook. Sam turns back to Bucky, seeing his discomfort; he won't let the topic go, though, not yet. He just softens his tone. "So, they 'activated the Winter Soldier'? What exactly does that mean?" Bucky shrugs, still not looking up. "Pretty much what he said - perfect obedience. What little consciousness they left me between cryo and the chair was squashed down, locked away. And I did whatever I was told, exactly the way they told me to." It finally clicks. He'd had his suspicions before, of course, but now Sam gets it. Visibly horrified, he stares at this quiet, broken man, and finally sees the truth of what he'd been through for 70 years: "They stripped away your autonomy. Shit, Bucky, they didn't even let you be a person. That's..." He swallows, looking like he'll be sick any minute. "That's awful, man. I'm so sorry." When Bucky tries to shrug it off and downplay it again, Sam gets angry. "Look at me!" He waits; it takes a few seconds, but Bucky reluctantly looks up and is surprised to see just how upset Sam is on his behalf. "It wasn't your fault. None of it. When Steve said you didn't have a choice, I had no idea... You really, truly had no choice; not even the ability to choose. That's horrifying." "I doubt it would make much difference to the people he's killed," Zemo points out snidely. "Or their families. Let's ask Tony Stark, shall we?" "You shut the hell up," Sam growls. He watches Bucky flinch and make that face - the face he's starting to really fucking hate - that says he agrees with Zemo. Bucky still can't see things the way Sam does; he still feels the guilt and shame, and even when he himself pointed out his lack of agency under HYDRA, it didn't click for him that Sam is right, not Zemo.
It's too much, too soon. Sam sees that and decides to change the subject, to give Bucky some time to process. He nods at the notebook, and they have their little Marvin Gaye debate, where Sam is over the top about it on purpose, because Bucky needs the distraction.
Of course, Zemo ruins it by opening his big mouth again and reminding Bucky of more trauma: his time fighting in WWII. That's why Sam latches onto the bit about Madripoor; to keep the focus not only on the task at hand, but off of Bucky's past that he clearly still can't cope with.
"James... You will have to become someone you claim is gone." Sam is officially ready to throw Zemo out a window. 😂 The only reason he doesn't jump to Bucky's defense again and basically tell Zemo to fuck himself (in a PG-13 way 🙄) is because Bucky's, as Sam pointed out in ep2, a grown-ass man, and because he's just learned how few decisions this poor man has been able to make in his life. Sam doesn't want to come across as another "handler," deciding everything for him, even if he does think this plan is stupid and needlessly cruel.
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At the bar, when asked if he wants "the usual", Sam just casually waves the bartender off like "nah". Zemo already said they had business to attend to, so it's not like anyone would be suspicious that now's probably not a good time to be doing weird shots lol. (wtf even was that? I'm not sure I want to know, but...what part of the snake did he drop into that drink?)
Sam's not an idiot (I'm really so sick of this trend of turning intelligent characters into morons because the writers can't think of any other way to move their plot along) so his cell phone has been off this whole time. No sudden call from Sarah to put them all in danger. There was really no point to that, anyway; Sharon likely would have killed Selby for talking about Nagle with or without the excuse of "saving" Sam and Bucky. I mean, it's not like they know who fired that shot, ever.
"They cleared the Bionic Staring Machine," Sam still jokes, but he follows it with, "and they think he's a mass-murderer." "They think?" Sharon stares at him incredulously. "Didn't he kill pretty much everyone he's ever met?" "Wow." Sam glances back at Bucky. "She really is awful now." To Sharon, he adds, "You met Steve; do you really think he'd have defied 117 countries to protect someone evil?" "He did it for Bucky," she points out. "Let's face it - Bucky could blow up half the planet, and Steve's loyal-to-a-fault ass would still take a bullet for him." "You know I'm sitting right here, right? I can hear you." "Look, I don't think you're evil, Bucky," Sharon assures him. "But I know you killed a lot of people for HYDRA." "I'm not denying it." "He didn't have a choice," Sam snaps, glaring at them both. "But we're not getting into that right now. My point is, the government's afraid of Bucky, and they still pardoned him. All you did was steal something. I'm sure they can be persuaded to see reason." "The day the US government sees reason," Sharon quips, rolling her eyes, "is the day I sprout real wings and fly off into the sunset." "Careful, Icarus," Bucky mocks with a smirk, "the sun and brand new wings don't exactly go together." Then he shrugs and glances at Sam. "But she's not wrong."
At the party that night, it takes a few minutes (grumpy old man Bucky's not sure how to feel about the music lol) but a peek of pre-war Bucky comes out to play: they were told to "blend in", so he dances. At first he's just bobbing around alone looking stoic and out of place, but soon he's smiling and dancing between two attractive people - one male, one female. Sam is surprised, but before he can tease him for it, Sharon comes to get them all. Even she's a little "wait what?" at Bucky having a little fun lol. (recovery is not linear, guys. trauma doesn't mean "perpetually miserable, no fun, doesn't even know how to smile." in my TFATWS, Bucky gets his lighter moments; real ones, not humor at his expense)
When they find Nagle, Bucky's the one who notices and opens the secret door, while Sam keeps an eye on Zemo. Bucky catches Zemo trying to grab that gun; closes the drawer on his hand before opening it and taking the gun away. "Nice try." Nagle tries to get away while there's only one person watching him, but Sam catches him and forces him back into his seat. With a bruising grip on the back of Zemo's neck, Bucky drags him back over to where he and Sam can both keep an eye on him. Nagle is killed in the shootout as they're trying to escape; Zemo still runs off, blows shit up, and comes back with the stolen car so he's not totally useless.
I had no problem with Zemo being the one to kill Nagle; Nagle was the worst and def had to die, and Zemo has never had an issue killing anyone. Where I took issue with this scene was Bucky and Sam being dumb enough to let Zemo wander and get his hands on a gun. Nope. Not happening.
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Anyway, shootout! Explosions! Funny banter! The seat thing, which is my favorite nod to CW ever lol... And then the conversation on the plane...
"You okay?" "Yeah." Sam sighs. "Just thinking." "About how to get Sharon that pardon you dangled in front of her?" He shakes his head. "About how Nagle referred to 'The Winter Soldier Program" like it was some kind of after school club; like you weren't standing right there. And 'the American test subject' like... Like Isaiah wasn't even a real person." He turns to face Bucky, looking angry and weary. "Makes me wonder how many times... How many times are we gonna run around in the same circles before people learn? And how many people need to get crushed underfoot in the meantime?" "Did you really just equate me with Isaiah?" Bucky frowns, not sure how to react to that. "That man is a hero." Sam opens his mouth to say something, but his phone goes off and Zemo approaches at the same time, effectively cutting off their conversation.
When they get to Riga and Zemo tries to guilt trip them over Sokovia, Bucky deadpan reminds him, "Neither of us were involved in that fight." "I doubt you'd have been much help if you were." He shrugs. "Probably not. But I like to save my guilt for events I was actually present for. It's a thing." Zemo laughs. "Fair enough."
Bucky goes on his walk, and meets up with Ayo.
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honey-hippie-harper · 3 years
Text
Infrangible
AFGHSAGHJS THIS IS SO LATE IS NOT EVEN FUNNY ANYMORE LMAO
In my defense, I stopped being a person long ago and now, in all the ways except physical, I happen to be a potato. BUT ANYWAY :’) This is for the Renegades Ship Week hosted by @greasicookies <3 (Thanks again!), for day 5, which is Maxpie. The prompt is “secrets”! <3
I had a tough time writing this because I’m going through a lot of stuff rn :’) still, I hope you can enjoy it x’ddd.
Tag list: @healing-winston-pratt @obsidianfr3sk @the-wee-woo-rita and afsghagshja @all-weather-is-bad (because this is a very...me fic lol and I think you’re already used to my sad attempt at humor haahahaah i’M SORRY AGSHJAKL) AND @lackadae because agshjs I made a reference to one of your drawings, hon :’) (I promise once again, to catch up with your content once I feel better afsghjak).
And that’s it. I hope you like it <3
When Max turned nine, he reached the conclusion that everybody forgot their early years at some point. Before, Adrian had already explained to him that wasn’t quite true, because he misunderstood Max’s statement and thought he was feeling bad about himself for not being able to recall certain things. He told him that, unlike what he thought –which was false because that’s not what Max meant- people usually couldn’t store those memories from when they were younger than three.
“Some people do.” He said. “But it’s normal if you don’t remember anything from when you were…I don’t know. Two.”
“Do you remember anything from when you were two?” Max asked him.
From the other side of the glass, Adrian scrunched up his nose. And then, obviously, he saw himself in the need to adjust his glasses.
“I’m not quite sure whether I was two or not. But I do know I was younger than five.” He started. “There was a small canal on the way to the apartment. When it rained, it would grow a lot. It didn’t have big torrents or anything, but it did grow a lot. The water usually went higher than my ankles. But the thing was…that every time  it grew, it became infested with turtles.”
He paused for a second.
“I really liked turtles.” He continued, shrugging. “My mother used to let me walk down to the water, as long as she was right behind me, obviously; one day, when we were coming back from the city, she stopped to attend a call. I got too impatient and went down alone when she wasn’t looking. The next thing I remember is that, just when I was getting up after catching a turtle, I felt her tugging me by the back of my shirt. The turtle fell on its shell.”
At that point, Max realized he had been staring at how he kept on fidgeting with his pen instead of looking him in the eye, but he continued doing so, because he didn’t like it when Adrian’s voice turned that serious.
“…She had never screamed at me like that.” He said, as if he were talking to himself and then, to erase the tension, he tried to scoff. “I don’t remember what she said, but I remember that she said it so loud I told her she was scaring the turtle. Then I started crying. Like, a lot. I think she was terrified too.”
In the end, everything turned too quiet for his liking, and Max did something his dad had advised him to do for times like these, when he just didn’t know what came next: Improvise.
“I didn’t know you liked turtles.”
“…Well, I did. I really liked turtles when I was younger.”
Max had seen a couple of turtles in his life, but not as many as Adrian had seen, he supposed, because Max had never stepped outside, except when he was a baby.
Which was exactly the point.
He didn’t have memories from when he was a baby, or a toddler. Most of the people who had come to talk to him had said they remembered events that were either too sad (like Adrian) or meaningful in their lives. Max didn’t have anything like that. In fact, his first –very blurry- memory was standing on the edge of the quarantine, with his hands pressed against the crystal, and then licking it.
According to his dads, he was between three and four (“He was three, Simon. What are you talking about?” “He was born in November.” “It wasn’t November yet.” “We had just celebrated his birthday. He was four.” “HE WASN’T FOUR, SIMON! HE WAS THREE! THREE! We were celebrating that his quarantine had just been built!” “IT WAS THE SAME EVENT, HUGH!”) and Aunt Tamaya, plus the both of them, were in the hallway. For some reason, the fact that his eyes were so huge (they were still big. But they were bigger when he was a baby) came off as odd to Tamaya. And the moment they made eye contact, he licked the glass.
Nobody knew why. Not even himself. The adults remembered it better than he did, of course, but none of them had ever been able to guess the reasoning behind it. They often expressed Max had been a very strange baby, mostly because of his lack of social skills. It’s not like he had chosen that, and it’s not like his fathers would’ve allowed it to happen if they had had any other option. But Max wasn’t willing to stand there and pretend that he knew what he was doing, either.
Most of the time, he didn’t.
He barely held any memories of the nurses that had ever been in charge of his care, but, for obvious reasons, he remembered Dad. It was always easier to remember the person who had taken care of you the most, he supposed. And Max knew, among a lot of things, that it wasn’t his other dad’s fault. Though, sometimes, he couldn’t help but blame him.
Again, he didn’t know why, but there were those days, when he needed he the most, where a voice inside of his head told him that, if Simon loved him enough, he would just sacrifice his powers to be with him. His powers weren’t that useful for combat anyway.
“Okay, but that’s kinda mean.” Adrian told him the first time he opened up about it, the night before he attended the Trials to choose the members of his patrolling team. “Pops might not have combat powers, but they’re as important as the rest of the members’. That’s why they work so well as a team, you know? Every power can be extremely helpful during a battle, as long as you know how to use it.”
Max wasn’t doing anything in particular that day. Nothing besides listening to Adrian and sitting on the floor , at least.
“But if every power is useful…” He said, tilting his head to the side. “…Why are you allowed to reject certain aspirants?”
Adrian frowned a little, not in the sense that he looked angry at Max. Rather, he was confused by the question and was trying to word the answer in a way that sounded rational.
“Because…” He gulped and clicked his tongue. “…Like I said…uhm…the Council is an extremely good team. They’ve been doing this for a while. Us, the patrolling leaders are…allowed to reject certain prodigies because we don’t have as much experience as them. And…we might not know how to use somebody’s powers, and that’s very dangerous. We don’t want people dying, do we?”
When he said that, something clicked inside Max’s brain, and he nodded in automatic. Obviously, a few years ago, a non-prodigy teacher had taught him how to read, and the moment Adrian notified him it was his year to be in the Trials, he managed to read the manual and the rules for the event, from a booklet and a pamphlet (respectively) he had asked his dad to bring for him. He didn’t get much new information, different from the one he heard on TV or the one presented in the posters. However, amongst the rules, there was a section that talked about banned powers, which contained only two categories:
-Complete telekinesis.
-Stardust modelling.
“Yeah.” Dad told him. He was bathing him in the quarantine’s bathroom (Of course. Where else?). “Stardust catchers…which….are able to model stardust, are extremely dangerous and there’s not much research about them. Nobody really knows how they work, and it would be pretty difficult for us to… handle a prodigy like that.”
“Like me.”
Dad had always had a pretty specific routine he had to follow when bathing him. If he missed or misplaced a step, he acted like would explode or something. Also, Max didn’t understand why, but ever since he started growing thicker hair, Dad became pretty strict on the fact they should take care of it so it would grow healthy. Hence why they had a full hair routine that they did in the bathtub. That day, the statement caught him so off-guard he grabbed the wrong bottle, and then, when he realized it, he was already pouring the dense liquid (that looked more like a paste to him) on Max’s head. Cursing under his breath, he placed his other hand in the middle so it would fall over his palm, washed Max’s head and started the routine all over again, before changing the subject:
“About complete telekinesis…there’s obviously a lot of research about that power. We know how to manage with that. But telekinetic prodigies are not …very accepted in our society. They’re pointed at…Frowned upon. In the worst of cases, other prodigies hunt them down and then kill them.”
In that moment, Max came to the conclusion that all that changing the subject thing had been in vain.
Because, from his part, the answer was exactly the same:
“Like me.”
And Dad didn’t like that, for he started scratching his scalp harder, accidentally.
“No. It’s nothing like you.” He said. “You’re not like that, Max. Society hates telekinesis because some evil dude decided to use his powers, his telekinesis, for awful reasons and stained prodigy’s names. You’re not like that. You’re not abusive, or selfish or evil. And I don’t want to hear you comparing yourself to him ever again. Understood?”
To this day, that was the most aggressive form of validation someone had ever given him, but Max took it anyway, because he trusted Dad, and if he had said something like that, then there had to be a clear reason behind it.
“Understood.” He whispered.
And he tried, he really tried, to believe it. But, like many other things, no matter how hard Max tried, he was still severely confused. Not that he didn’t know about the Age of Anarchy, or the parties involved in the Age of Anarchy.
The quarantine, needless to say, could get pretty boring most of the time. Max had to do a lot of things to kill time, and some of those activities involved reading books that children shouldn’t be reading. He did read some children’s books, but then he would find himself looking through history articles and books, and reading the chapters that interested him the most. For instance, he was confident he knew about the Age of Anarchy, but one thing was knowing about it, and another, different thing, was having an opinion about in regards to it.
Max didn’t know if he had something to say about the topic. If he did, it was a very incomplete idea, and it was very likely he wouldn’t be able to phrase it correctly.
The group of people Max talked the most to were adults, and those adults, especially the ones who had experienced the Age of Anarchy and somehow managed to make it out alive, refused to talk about it. As for the few children he had talked to…
Well, about them…
Long story short, they had lives.
They all had lives outside of a glass, unlike Max. Maybe they weren’t the most interesting of lives, but at least they for sure had to be more interesting than his’. They didn’t have a pre-established schedule, where a designated person would come in to feed him or extract blood samples from his body, to then take them to the laboratory. They didn’t have to hear a total of seven alarms to remind him what he had to do: Wake up and get dressed, have breakfast and brush his teeth, enter the virtual sessions with his teachers, take a shower, have his blood samples taken,  start doing his homework –if he had any- and do whatever he wanted once he was finished, have dinner, brush his teeth and go to bed, and then start all over again.
That moment, when he had spare time, would be the same one normal kids used to go out with their friends, like Adrian did. To go to the park and get themselves a scarily huge wound at the center of their knee. To live. To breathe air. To do…literally anything that wasn’t this.
Because Max was different from the many children he hadn’t yet gotten the opportunity to meet or talk to, because, obviously, they wouldn’t want to spend the whole day hanging out with a person…like him.
The only way Max could see two out of the three people in his family was through a crystal wall. And he couldn’t kiss them, he couldn’t touch them… sometimes he even wondered if he knew how their voices sounded, because, after all, Dad’s voice sounded the tiniest bit different once he crossed that infamous glass door.
He couldn’t walk through the streets of Gatlon, because, for starters, he didn’t know them. And if he dared to go out there, he would get killed on spot for having accidentally neutralized a prodigy who didn’t want to be neutralized.
Other kids had nannies whom they complained about when their parents couldn’t look after them (at least that’s the kind of things he saw on the TV shows he watched) but Max had patrol units that would move from one corner of the room to another, ready to attack anyone who came closer than necessary to him, because the only one who could take care of him in person, was Hugh.
Other kids could go out freely, without being scared of anything at all. They could get hurt while having fun with their friends and family. They could laugh until they cried with them. They could hug them, sleep in the same bed as them. They could walk their pets, go on road trips, go to amusement stores, water parks…
They could experience the current world; watch all the new events that were happening every day, in first hand.
They didn’t have to read about the past, or the people from the past to keep themselves entertained. They didn’t have the need to do that. At all.
They were living the lives Max couldn’t have, because he was too dangerous for that.
And obviously, that’s why he couldn’t just…go around asking other kids about what was their favorite bug, their favorite planet…or their opinions about Ace Anarchy, and if Pops (Simon) saying “Alec, with an A as in Abusive Swine” made them laugh.
Besides, he hadn’t even met that many kids his age. Or kids, for that matter.
He was aware Adrian wasn’t exactly a grown up, but he wasn’t a kid either, so, he usually didn’t make it into that list.
In fact, just like the banned powers in that manual, there were only two kids in Max’s list of acquaintances.
Aunt Tamaya’s first baby was born without powers, when Max was like four years old, and his dads were way too excited about it (Weird thing to brag about out loud, honestly, because all the recruits in the Headquarters were betting ridiculous amounts of money on which powers the Thunderbaby would have –Max could hear them- and one day they just heard The Dread Warden storming into the hallway, euphorically screaming “GUESS WHAT, MY LITTLE CHERUB BABY? YOUR COUSIN IS ABSOLUTELY FREAKING POWERLESS!”), for they thought Max would finally be able to have a friend who was more or less his age. Dad was the one who brought him in, two weeks after he was born. He was still tiny, red and chubby, and wrapped in his three different blankets that way, he looked like a bloated marshmallow.
Aunt Tamaya, her husband, Pops, Adrian, Aunt Kasumi and Uncle Evander were outside (as always) waiting to see what happened…and, it was extremely odd for Max to admit it, but he couldn’t remember much about that moment, even though he was already older than three. There was, however, a video taken by Uncle Evander where, if you narrowed your eyes hard enough, you could see the moment Max burst into tears right after kissing the baby’s cheek.
Neil was his friend.
At least, Max considered him to be his friend. Still, they had an age gap of four whole years, and a part of him was waiting until he was a little older so they could be on the same page. Because sometimes, when Neil couldn’t comprehend something semi-important that Max had just said, things could get pretty awkward, because there were occasions when, if Neil got too frustrated over anything, he would start crying, and his sobs often summoned his mother all the way from across the building. She never particularly tried to put the blame on Max. In fact, she hadn’t even glared at him not once, ever.
But she did choose to take him with her, into her office, or ask Adrian to babysit him while he calmed down.  Afterwards, he usually didn’t come back to the quarantine.
“It’s not your fault, Max.” Pops would tell him, always. “It’s just that…Neil...he’s younger than you. There are things that might be…easy to you, but that are super complicated to him. And you might be able to do things that he can’t, and he can’t understand why he can’t, so he gets super confused and angry and that’s why he cries and Tamaya has to come and comfort him.”
“That, and because she’s like a...very freaky bird mom who hears her children cry and comes around with her super sonic enhanced sense of hea—“
“Hugh, don’t be rude.”
Every time they had that discussion in front of him, Max could never understand why Pops said Dad was being rude. He was right, to a certain extent. Aunt Tamaya was just…being a mom.
And that’s what moms did.
At least, that’s what Max had read and seen on TV because families like his’ were…super rare to find in his cartoons or favorite books. In fact, the times when he had seen himself represented in any of the things were so few that, for the longest time, Max had this weird, messed up idea that biological men could give birth. He thought that Adrian, apart from the fact that he was the closest to him, looked more similar to Simon, and that had to mean he had given birth to him, while Hugh had been the one to give birth to Max.
One year, when Max was six, they finished Lady Indomitable’s gigantic golden statue, placed downtown. It was late June, and though the city had previously looked covered in colors, that day it just looked…white and golden. That’s the best way Max  could find to put it into words.
According to Max’s weather application, the heat was unbearable that day (good thing he couldn’t feel anything because the temperature in the quarantine was always regulated) yet, according to what he was seeing in one of his screens, a great percentage of the citizens of Gatlon were marching in the streets carrying floating lanterns, headed towards downtown where the event was being held.
The Council was standing in front of the covered statue. All of them except Blacklight, who had stayed to take care of the Headquarters, and Max could see him from where he was. They gave a speech about Lady Indomitable together, and as they started revealing the statue, Tsunami sang a song that was supposed to be one of Lady Indomitable’s favorite ones, and that Max was too young to recognize (he supposed). In his opinion, it was a cute event, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t utterly confused the moment he saw Adrian taking one step ahead to be the first one to let go of his floating lantern, which was different from the other ones, because his’ was bigger, and it had a big “I”. Besides, people waited a couple of seconds until it was stable above their heads to let go of their own floating lanterns.
It still looked cute to him, but now it looked weird as well. So he got up from his chair, and walked towards the edge, pressing his hands against the glass. He hoped that would be enough to magically catch Evander’s attention, who was, at the moment, using his chair as a swing, as he typed a number in his computer, copying it from his calculator and eating from his salad every now and then. Obviously, Max’s telepathic call wasn’t enough, and he had to knock on the glass a couple of times, loudly. Even then, Uncle Evander didn’t look up in his direction.
But he did hear him, because he did respond.
“It’s not gonna work, Maximus. I’m not getting you out.”
As a side note, Max considered telling him his full name was Maximilian and not Maximus, because that was way before he realized it was a nickname. Nevertheless, he just let it pass, for the simple reason he had better things to ask. That’s why he proceeded to knock again, instead of speaking.
“What is it?”
“I wanna ask you something.”
Evander tried to steady himself in the chair without falling on his back, and once he succeeded, he came closer to the quarantine, with his arms over his hips.
“Why is Adrian doing that?” He asked, just because he wasn’t able to find another way to phrase it, while pointing at the screen behind him; Evander narrowed his eyes following his finger, as if he hadn’t been watching the event himself from a livestream on his phone. A few seconds later, he seemed to realize what he was talking about, and bit his upper lip, before pouting barely a little.
Then, he clicked his tongue.
“Because that’s his mom. And today’s her birthday.”
And it’s not that Max was insensitive enough not to recognize that it was very sad, but at the same time those single words were enough to make the idea he had of his life fall apart. All the things he thought he had already managed to understand felt fake and incorrect, and it was so fast it almost made him feel dizzy.
“She’s not his mom.” He declared.
Evander opened his eyes very widely and, next thing he knew, was that, for some reason, he looked nervous. Which, to say the least, was very…unlike Evander. He was usually super…confident, and, in Dad’s words: “He walks with his back too straight for a person who says some dumb shit every time he opens his mouth”.
At that moment, his back wasn’t straight at all, and he kept on wiping the sweat off his palms in the suit.
“…I mean…she’s not…alive anymore. But… that doesn’t mean that…”
“Noooo. I didn’t mean that.” Max cut him off. “She’s not her mom, because Adrian already has a mom.”
He stopped suddenly. Max could almost see his brain working at full speed, trying to process the data he had just received. Then, he blinked, arching his eyebrow.
“Who’s…who’s his mom?” He asked, getting closer to the crystal, and crouching down to be at Max’s height (Evander was almost too tall for his own sake). “Do Simon or Hugh…?”
“No. I mean she’s not his mom because Simon’s his mom.” Max stated, confident enough to move a mountain with his raw determination and his bare hands, which, needless to say, did nothing but make Evander even more confused.
Not that Max couldn’t understand why.
He was a brand new, redeemed person now.
But back then he wasn’t.
“…Simon is what, you said?”
“Adrian’s mom.” Max reaffirmed.
Still bewildered, Evander gawked. Perhaps he understood where that confusion was coming from but, at the same time, maybe he was too disturbed to ask for additional information. Max didn’t know which one of the two would make him feel more embarrassed, especially taking into account the next thing Evander said:
“That is the weirdest shit somebody has ever said to me, and I’ve talked to the Puppeteer an unhealthy amount of times.”
He wasn’t the one who explained to him the way his own family worked. On the contrary, he immediately told his dads about it, and next time the both of them came to talk to him, they tried to make him understand the concept of homosexual couples.
And they failed.
Miserably.
And he was using that term, because after that talk, Max went through life for a while saying that his ethnicity was Gay, because both of his dads were gay. Over and over again, they tried to correct him, but nothing seemed to work, and Max kept on spreading the information that he was gay (something he didn’t know yet) until Aunt Kasumi decided to intervene and, for his birthday, she got him a children’s book called All in Rainbow, which, according to the information in the first page, was actually a translation from a Latin American book written by two lesbians (one of them non-binary) and illustrated by the same woman who had made the Anarchists’ and the Renegades’ graphic novels and was also a Latina.
That book was something similar to a gay encyclopedia. It was narrated by this girl named Phoenix, because it followed her throughout her school and her daily life, where she came across different people and families. After every short story, there was an informative section explaining everything in regards to the new person’s identity, including their flag, the meaning of said flag, and the explanation of certain terms. Max really enjoyed it, and, in fact, he ended up going through it more than once. When he tried to persuade Adrian into reading it too, he admitted he already had, when he was younger,  and proceeded to make a comment about how pretty the name “Phoenix” was.
It was only then that Max was able to understand how his own family worked, and how freaking inept he had sounded when he decided it was a great idea to use it as an ethnicity.
That book was, in fact, the cue for all the grown ups in his life to start buying books for him, which he was grateful for, except for the one that he, ironically enough, had gotten from Uncle Evander. Sure, he appreciated that he had spent money on that,  but Max didn’t appreciate the fact that the plot was about a dog that was sent away to a school for dogs but made everyone believe he was in jail so he could escape. The drawings were cute, but he just couldn’t find the moral of the story and he didn’t like that.
His dads, from their part, got him a book about two frogs that, at least to Max, acted as if they were a couple; Aunt Tamaya was the one of the short books without drawings.
As for Aunt Kasumi…she usually brought a lot of educational books; every time she overheard him expressing something that was making him confused, she brought him a book about it, including that time she heard him asking Ruby Tucker “So, are you always bleeding?” completely out of context.
Max supposed that it had a lot to do with the fact that Aunt Kasumi was in charge of Child Services, and she spent a lot of time with children, especially because she liked to volunteer in orphanages, having been in one herself when she was a little girl. She usually moved in prodigy orphanages, for she was one to know the poor conditions they sometimes presented.
And…to say the least, she wasn’t a woman of many words. She was very reserved with everything she did. And, besides, it was none of Max’s business. After all, he was just a kid.
But, in this case, it kind of involved him.
Kind of.
For the simple reason that there were two names in the list of people his age Max had talked to. The first one was Neil (who wasn’t even his age. He was just close to that) and the second one…
The second one involved Aunt Kasumi.
Just like people were able to overhear his conversations through the quarantine, Max was able to overhear the conversations they were having on the outside, especially when he was trying to do it on purpose.
Every time he was too bored, in other words.
Some of the things older people said were confusing, but, over time, Max had learned to store that information, so he could comprehend it better in the future. He didn’t know at what level that was healthy, yet he still did it because, literally, he didn’t have anything better to do.
During extremely busy days, the Council chose to spend the night in the Headquarters, just in case, and while they could sleep in the common room, if Pops was too insistent on wanting to be close to the quarantine, they slept in the hallway.
In Max’s hallway.
Of course, Dad would sleep with him inside the quarantine but, in order to make it feel more like a pajama party, they slept close to the edge of the “room” (if it could be called that way), so close to the Councils’ inflatable beds, they could’ve touched them if there hadn’t been a wall in between.
When they were sleeping in that hallway, there wasn’t a patrol looking over Max, because they were the patrol and, every two hours, they changed turns to stay awake. All of them except Dad, who stayed the entire night with Max. The others often got up and started walking around the quarantine according to their ages. That is, Aunt Tamaya went first, followed by Pops, then Aunt Kasumi, and Uncle Evander at the end. However, since it wasn’t like they were too used to having many hours of sleep, Kasumi and Evander usually got up at the same time and patrolled together.
That night, Max was having trouble sleeping. Dad was hugging him, which made him feel very comfortable, but, at the same time, before he wrapped his arms around him, he had been moving way too much, and that had made Max feel uneasy, because a part of him, though he knew it was highly possible it wasn’t true, was feeding the annoying worm at the back of his brain that told him he was the one making Dad uneasy. That Dad was moving and couldn’t sleep because he didn’t want to be anywhere near him. Perhaps he would’ve preferred to be with Pops. Perhaps he would’ve preferred to be with Adrian, even. Anyone but Max.
Which, again, he knew things…weren’t like that. But that little, nameless, uninvited worm was always telling him that, over and over again, determined to repeat those awful words until they made so much noise they made him cry.
And even then, when he was already crying, the worm ate deeper into his brain and told him to stop because, in the end, who was he crying for anyway?
Who was he crying for, if nobody was here to see or hear him?
That night, of course, he didn’t cry, for the simple reason that…well, he did have somebody who would hear him cry, and maybe comfort him like Aunt Tamaya comforted Neil when he was crying…
But he didn’t want Dad to do that.
Not today.
Not because he were mad at him, but because he feared that, if he did, then Dad would be the one who would get mad.
Besides, that night he got extremely busy trying to overhear the conversation between Kasumi and Evander who, the moment they got up, started talking as they walked, first at a volume so low their voices could’ve been considered murmurs, but then, with every second, the issue started escalating.
And it wasn’t that they were arguing, it was that they weren’t exactly happy with each other, nor did they seem to manage to get to a mutual agreement.
Max felt like that time he was watching a movie with his earphones on, and instead of paying attention to the plot, he kept trying to identify which sounds were dominant in his left ear, and which ones were dominant in his right ear, because Uncle Evander and Aunt Kasumi were walking around the quarantine, and the echoes of their voices were floating right behind them, making it almost impossible for Max to decipher their messages word by word.
At least, until they stopped in front of him. That is, very close to the inflatable mattresses, too. And with just one eye open, he was able to tell Aunt Kasumi wasn’t amused, with her arms so tight across her chest that way, and with Uncle Evander standing more straight than necessary (because, yes, Dad was right about that...sometimes... because Max had read somewhere that tall people had to be really careful with their posture to avoid spine deformities or have less complications when they were older) waving his –as Aunt Tamaya would’ve called them- Hot Cheeto fingers right in front of her face, in a way so aggressive she sometimes had to lean backwards not to get one of her eyes poked out.
“…and it won’t look good for the organization. It won’t look good, Kasumi. You know why?”
“Yes, Vandy. I know why. I already knew before, yet you took the time to explain it to me another seven times. I mean, thank you, I guess, but—“
“If I kept on explaining it to you, it’s because I didn’t…and I don’t know what’s not clicking.”
“What do you mean with what’s not clicking?” And she tilted her head to the side. “…Are you still talking to me?”
“Don’t play dumb, Kasumi. Especially not in front of me, because I know you.”
“Right. But I still don’t get what you’re referring to. What’s not clicking about what, exactly?”
Evander laughed in a way Max would’ve just…understood if she had decided to punch him in the face so he would stop.
“We’re a big organization, Kasumi. People talk.”
“Of course that people talk. I mean, our citizens support our cause and our government system. In fact, statistically, more than half of the population do, but sometimes there are things that… are for their own good but they will refuse to understand and accept them anyway. And that’s normal. We might be the law, but we can’t control how the masses think, you know?”
“For their own good, you say. Beneficial.”
“Exactly.”
“Beneficial for who, if you’d be so kind?” Evander laughed again. “As far as I understand, we’re talking about one single problem, from a single person. It won’t bring anything beneficial, as you call it, for our organization, or for our system…if anything, it will damage it and make us lose credibility.”
“…Why?”
As a response, he started flapping his arms around, as if he were trying to point at something invisible. Or at something that wasn’t really there.
And this time, Aunt Kasumi didn’t try to pretend she was seeing it, and remained silent until Evander realized he would have to make himself understood.
“Because…” He clenched his fists, sighing loudly, almost like he was certain he was right and Aunt Kasumi wasn’t. “Our policy. Remember that? You know, a thing that actually exists and you helped write?”
She didn’t respond.
“Our policy as Renegades, it’s that we shall keep our people safe, and that includes prodigy and non-prodigy citizens. We shall preserve their lives no matter the cost, and create a safe environment where all can coexist and protect each other. That means that no prodigy individual with questionable reasons is to be allowed to cross that gate and disturb the peace or, worse, put somebody’s life at risk.”
“I’m aware of that.”
“Yes, you should be, because we wrote it, for fuck’s sake.”
“Evander, please. There’s no need to curse or—“
“…But you know what that means? It means that we can’t just…go against that policy and expect our citizens, our recruits, even, to still take us seriously.”
“Oh, but I’m following that policy because, as you might remember, we also pledged to assist anyone whose life was at risk, and people who, day by day, have to live under very vulnerable circumstances. It is our job to intervene and take them to a safer place, where their quality of life can improve, isn’t it?”
“It is, but that applies for people who aren’t dangerous to society.”
At that point, Max had both his eyes open, and he was seeing the scene more clearly.
In fact, everything was so clear, that he was able to read the confusion in Aunt Kasumi’s expression, even before she said:
“…This is a kid we’re talking about.”
“She is dangerous.”
“She’s not dangerous, Evander. She's a kid. Sure, her behavior has caused her to go bouncing from orphanage to orphanage like a rubber ball but that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be helped, that doesn’t mean we should just turn our backs at her, and that doesn’t mean she’s dangerous.”
“You know damn well her behavior’s not what I’m talking about.”
“Well, I am, because that’s the only thing that should concern us at the moment.”
“No, it’s not?”
“It is. Because she’s a kid…and, honestly, Vandy…” Aunt Kasumi sighed. “… I know we were raised thinking life is war, but… the truth is, people are not born evil. Or dangerous, for that matter. Take your time and think about it, and  you can talk to me again once you’ve calmed down, because you must be pretty much aware I don't appreciate this tone. Besides, it’s not like this little argument is going to stop me anyway.” She shrugged.
“…after all, I already talked to Hugh.”
“…And what did he say?”
“It’s not my place to tell you that. Ask him.”
Max never knew whether he had taken that suggestion or not but, knowing Evander, he just assumed he hadn’t. And, to be honest, he never asked Dad about it either. He just stood and watched how everything proceeded to go down and chaos unleashed.
Though, he had to admit, unlike what had happened with other “big” events, this one specific chaos was rather discrete. A kind of well-kept secret.
In fact, the only explicit hint that something would happen in the next few days, was the little disturbance caused by Team Frostbite (it was always Team Frostbite. Max had no idea why everyone was so…willing to put up with their…issues so much, and without hesitation) when it was their turn to patrol around the quarantine and Evander came around, holding his notepad, and muttered something to them.
“Whom?!” Genissa Clark, Frostbite, snapped immediately.
Evander frowned and, judging by the way his moustache moved, he also pouted, before turning at Mack Baxter, Aftershock, to start talking to him instead.
“Do you have any idea of what she’s talking about?” He clicked his tongue. “Like…okay, nevermind…”
When Max looked up, he saw the exact moment when Evander realized he was listening to the conversation, so he lowered his tone once again.  Yet, Max was still able to see the million ways in which Genissa Clark's face contorted and, in the end, the first second Evander shut his mouth, she declared:
“We’re not available for that. Perhaps that task should be assigned to Team Sketch or Team Peregrine. They’re always lollygagging around, it’s about time they get some real responsibi—“
“That’s a no, then. Alright. Thanks for your cooperation, Team Frostbite. Or, lack of, more likely. Do better next time, okay?”
If Max wanted to be honest with himself, it hadn’t taken him much time to realize he wasn’t fond of any of the members in Team Frostbite. Or Frostbite herself. In fact, he considered her to be almost insufferable, and, again, he couldn’t quite understand why they were allowed to boss everybody around. To a certain extent, they reminded him of the popular kids (who were also bullies) in every movie he had ever watched. They weren’t nice. Not even likeable.
Maybe Max was just very specific on the type of people he liked.
Or maybe he liked everyone and their mom, except Team Frostbite, because he didn’t know any better than that, while  at the same time he knew better than liking Team Frostbite.
But he didn’t know better than liking Margaret White, because…well…
She hadn’t done anything particularly awful for him to have an opinion as strong as Uncle Evander’s about her.
She came on a Friday.
Not that she exclusively came to talk to him.
She, in fact, arrived alongside Aunt Kasumi, who was wearing her civilian clothes –High-waisted jeans and a baby blue shirt, damp with sweat because it was hot outside- and kept leaving her car key on every table that came across her, before coming back to it to grab them.
At first, Max wasn’t able to see Margaret very well, mostly because he was distracted with his online classes, and she was taken straight to Dad’s office, along with Adrian’s entire team. And though Max didn’t see much, he was able to catch a glimpse on how Adrian kept on trying to grab her hand, and she insisted on pulling away.
At some point, he had read about that too.
The Renegades accepted recruits from ages 14 and up, talking about patrolling. However, they had a child protection program, where, basically, they assisted orphan prodigy children with behavioral issues or, though only few people liked to admit it, potential to be a part of the organization when they were older. Adrian didn’t like it and, strangely enough, out of everyone, Evander didn’t like it either. Nevertheless, Evander was one to get more aggressive when it came to child recruitment, which, thankfully, wasn’t common at all.
In fact, those cases were so rare, that they referred to them as “exceptions”. After all, children were not allowed into the Trials. As far as Max knew, they weren’t placed in patrol units. On the contrary, they were given small positions in the organization, and their paychecks were directed to their respective savings account, something that Pops was in charge of. However, they could use that money for their personal needs or something they wanted to buy, as the few children recruits resided in orphanages around Gatlon and went back there after their shift was over. Max supposed that sometimes their caretakers refused to buy them something because it wasn’t good for their health and it must be very satisfying to tell them it was their money (That’s what Adrian always did when Dad refused to buy something for him).
(That, or he went and asked Pops for that same thing).
Usually, they could have cash withdrawals just by presenting their Renegade Recruit ID because, obviously, they didn’t have an official ID yet.
And not only that. The children recruits were assigned a patrol unit with older members to look after them, or help them with anything they needed. Taking into account the conversation he had overheard, he supposed that duty had fallen on Adrian’s team (A theory that was later confirmed to be true by Adrian himself).
They were never left unsupervised, just like Max.
The day Margaret arrived, for a couple of minutes, maybe hours, Max was submerged in his own little world, and in the assignment his last teacher had told him to do. It was just him, his colored pencils, his paper sheets, his notes, his head, his hands, and the miniature planet Earth that his quarantine supposed, against the real world that he had never stepped on.
But every now and then, a little piece of the unknown, mysterious real world came running to his encounter and talked to him, sometimes in the most sudden, unsolicited way.
Sometimes it was Dad opening the door without calling. Sometimes it was Adrian pressing a new drawing against the crystal. Sometimes it was Pops, making a little “Psst” sound to get his attention.
Sometimes it was three little knocks, and the girl that was producing them with her knuckles.
Back then, Margaret’s hair was longer, to the point where she could tie it in a high ponytail, decorated with a blue bow, which combined with his orphanage uniform: A white polo, with the institution’s symbol by the right side of her chest, beneath a cobalt blue skirt with suspenders, long white socks and black scholar shoes.
He saw her and recognized she was real the first time, but Max still gave himself a couple of seconds to grasp the fact that she was really there.
Well, not there-there.
That she was there, as in, through the glass.
And she was calling him, even if she wasn’t saying anything. In fact, she was just there, eating from a chocolate bar with puffed rice. Her free hand was still over the glass.
And she was waiting.
So, he figured he didn’t want to keep her waiting anymore, and leaving his task and his tools behind, Max walked in her direction. And like it always happened, he stopped right before bumping his forehead against the hard, translucent surface.
Margaret took another bite from her chocolate, with an arched eyebrow, but she said nothing. From afar, Max hadn’t been able to really appreciate her features, but now that he was closer, he realized she was taller than him; her small, brown eyes were making her lashes look bigger; her black hair looked thicker and he was able to conclude that her skin tone was more or less like Pops’, maybe a little darker. She had a mark over her cheek, and at first Max thought it was a mole or a birthmark…until, of course, he realized that moles weren’t (or, at least, shouldn’t be) purple, and realized it was a bruise.
He didn’t ask her about it. Adrian had once told him that there were people who might not want to talk about their bruises or open wounds, not because the stories behind them were painful to tell, but because they were too embarrassing and telling embarrassing stories was an inconvenience.
“…well… now that I think about it…” He said right after. “…That’s not it. No. Not really. Sometimes your wounds’ backstories are painful. Or sometimes…you just want to keep them a secret, you know? And secrets are…sort of important.”
He believed every word.
Hence why, instead of saying something too nosy about that bruise, a little slowly at first, Max started lifting his hand up, until he reached the spot where Margaret’s was, and pressed his palm there. When she stared at his palm in confusion, Max clarified:
“Hugh five. You know?" Max giggled a little." As in… the Captain? Hugh? ...No?"
She didn’t laugh. And that was odd because Adrian would’ve.
Margaret wasn’t Adrian, sadly. And, it seemed to be, she hadn’t had an older sibling to tell her that some things just…weren’t adequate as icebreakers to start a conversation. Because, like Adrian had said, there were certain things other people might not want to talk about.
“Are you sick?” She directly asked.
Max was still “pressing” his hand against hers.
Gulping hard, he felt his throat boiling hot, almost as if it were growing blisters.
“No.” He said in a hoarse voice. “Why?”
Not pulling away either, Margaret said:
“The other day, Sister Malinda brought a very tiny baby into the orphanage. They were so small they had to take them to the medical wing.” She took another bite from her chocolate, and kept on speaking with her mouth full. “I sneaked out of my room to see them, and they were inside this little glass box that helped  keeping them alive. Sister Tam told me so.”
Max kept quiet for a while. He would’ve been lying if he said he didn’t have a little curiosity about the name, but Margaret solved everything that had to be solved even if he didn’t ask her to.
“Sister Tam was named after Thunderbird. She’s younger than the other nuns.”
He guessed so.
Aunt Tamaya’s real name had been revealed to the general public on the 13th year into the Age of Anarchy, when she reappeared after being away for months thanks to an accident that involved Queen Bee and a cliff or something like that (Max couldn’t quite understand it, and Aunt Tamaya couldn’t remember much about it either. If she did, then she just didn’t desire to talk about it). It wasn’t a fun anecdote or anything like that but, according to his dads, the name Tamaya topped the lists for the most female-assigned names for at least a year, and the same thing happened in the 20th year into the Age of Anarchy...however, by the time she was buried, the world didn’t know Lady Indomitable’s real name, and for an entire month, people used Regina instead of Georgia. When Max asked why, Dad answered that, when attending public events, Lady Indomitable used to wear a pair of shiny golden R-shaped earrings that caused everybody in Gatlon to develop mass hysteria and made themselves believe that those Rs meant Regina, when in reality, according to Lady Indomitable herself, one of them meant “Rawles”, and the other “Renegade”. In fact, Oscar Silva (Smokescreen, one of the members of Adrian’s team) had once said that one of his cousins, who lived in Mexico, had been named Renata Regina (Though nobody knew what the heck that first name was, and Oscar had a really peculiar way to pronounce Regina) because she was born a few days after Lady Indomitable’s decease.
“I knew that.” Max lied.
“Sure, buddy. I bet you did.” Margaret chuckled. And there, Max realized she thought she was too clever.
Which, he didn’t doubt she was. He wasn’t in the position to state that. At least, not yet.
But what he was in the position to state, was that, if she thought herself to be clever, then it was his opportunity to think of himself as clever too. After all, he had been reading his whole life because he didn’t have anything else to do.
If Margaret was clever, then so was he.
“You’re talking about an incubator.” He said.
Margaret looked up out of a sudden (Max hoped she hadn’t gotten dizzy). He could still see the chocolate, that at this point should’ve been mush, stored in the inside of her right cheek.
“Uh?” She asked, struggling to keep her mouth closed.
Max gulped, and tapped the surface with his fingers.
“The thing where they put the little baby. It’s called an incubator. That’s where they put pre-term babies, because they’re not ready to survive outside of their mother’s womb. Sometimes their lungs don’t work on their own, sometimes their hearts are too fast or too slow…”
“You look too old to be a baby.” She observed. “Are your powers something related to that? Like, are you a baby who doesn’t look like a baby?”
For a second, Max thought about quoting Evander that time he had boldly stated that Simon was Adrian’s mom, but he didn’t because he wasn’t in the mood to curse.
“…No. First, this is not an incubator. And second,  I’m a kid.” He answered. “I’m not a baby.”
“Then why are you here?”
The short answer was that, honestly, that was none of her business. And the even shorter answer, was:
“I can’t tell you. It’s a secret. And secrets are sort of important.”
“A secret.” She repeated, as if tasting the word. “…You don’t look like you want to be here. Are you allowed to come out?”
The short answer was still that it was none of her business. But, if he wanted to be honest, for some reason, he didn’t want to give that answer. Because, to be fair, she would find out on her own sooner or later. Because, yes, people talked, and while his dads were kind of secretive about him, everyone in the headquarters knew him. Her being clueless was just a temporary event that would vanish into thin air in a blink.
And, for some reason, he wanted to enjoy it while it lasted.
Maybe tell her something that wasn’t real. Maybe… tell her something that wasn’t necessarily true but that he wanted it to be. Maybe something that was more interesting than what he was, in reality; maybe something that would make the worm in his brain go away for two weeks.
"I can't get out." He finally decided. "Because this glass is infrangible."
Then, he knocked on it three times.
"See?"
Margaret tilted her hair to the side, looking like a cat.
"What does that word mean?"
And dumb as it sounded, Max felt a twinge in his stomach along with a violent wave of pride. Because, even if it was hard for him to admit it, he was hoping she would ask that.
He wanted her to ask that.
"It means you can't break it."
Margaret's eyes seemed bigger. But just as she was separating her lips to speak, somebody behind her cleared their throat.
That's when Max spotted Aunt Kasumi leaned against a wall with her arms crossed. When Margaret looked over her shoulder, she found her there too. But while Max waved at her, Margaret remained inexpressive.
"You're very far from the restroom, Maggie." Kasumi said, in a serious tone. Afterwards, she massaged her temples.
"Please, darling. Just… help me here, okay? We have to go back to the office."
And she didn't seem mad, but rather disappointed.
When it came to Aunt Kasumi, that was enough. Max knew that, and Margaret knew that too. That's why they both removed their hands from the glass, and Margaret started going away.
However, before she was too far, Max asked:
"Why are you here?"
And Margaret turned around, smiling.
"If you're not telling me, I'm not telling you." She sentenced. Then, she proceeded to imitate his voice as she said:
"It's a secret."
And for a while, obviously, it remained that way. A secret. But it wasn't long before they both knew everything they needed to know.
Margaret was integrated into the janitorial team, but, for a while, people talked about her and her powers, and Max couldn’t help but remember what Dad had told him in the bathtub, and the conversation between Evander and Kasumi.
Yet, more than scared, Max felt… something he didn't know what it was. In fact, he wasn't scared of her. More likely, a part of him felt that he knew what it was like to be her, because maybe they weren't that different after all.
People were scared of them both.
But he wasn't scared of her. No, not really.
He hoped she wasn’t scared of him either.
Maybe they could've been very good friends, even through the infrangible glass that kept him from getting pointed at, frowned upon or killed.
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k1ttyadventurer · 4 years
Text
AvA Thoughts and Ideas
Yes, this is my first blog post. I can’t believe it was Animator vs Animation that made me want to interact with people on this site.
@sammy8d257 (I’m the anon that wanted to add to your theories) and @inksandpensblog, I’m tagging you guys because I really like your AvA theory crafting and I want to share my thoughts with you. Hope you don’t mind getting tagged. (Also, I’m so down to discuss this stuff in DMs or on Discord if you want? I’m craving AvA discussion.)
Edit: Rephrased a few things to flow better or be better understood. Also added a new point I just thought of. Edit 2: Fixing things that didn't get fixed the first time.
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Okay, so, AvA.
(Also, I will be calling Orange/Second ‘Orange’ because that’s what Alan calls him, unless I’m referring to “avatar-state” Orange, then I may refer to him as ‘Second’.)
((Also, also, my thoughts jump around quite a bit, sorry about that! Hope you can follow my thought process.))
(((Also, also, also, my opinions and headcanons expressed here are not set in stone. They could definitely change, which has already happened over the course of writing this.)))
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1) Chosen’s relationship with Dark. - I definitely think that Chosen liked Dark (no offense to shippers, but I’m talking purely friendship here), however, I would guess that Dark considered the two of them much closer than Chosen did. - Chosen initially followed Dark’s lead when destroying things. It was all he had known, and Dark wanted to do it. But Chosen started noticing it was actually hurting others, and didn’t really achieve anything. - When they came to odds, Chosen struck first, while Dark just tried to stubbornly continue with his plan. It makes Chosen look like he immediately jumped to attacking, but I’d like to point out, in the flashback, he actively wanted Dark to stop attacking others when they were on the Newgrounds page. I think this means that this tension had been building up for some time. It wasn’t a sudden thing of Chosen deciding to attack Dark. It was likely sudden for Dark, because Chosen didn’t communicate with him (probably), but for Chosen, I think the creation of the virus was simply the last thing that convinced him that his former friend was actually an evil person. - (I would love to see a reformed Dark and Chosen being friends! But, I think trying to say he wasn’t all bad in the first place is severely glossing over the fact that he did--and was going to do--some awful, awful things.) - Chosen had no hesitance when he returned from defeating the first spider virus. He was going to beat Dark. - (I also find it interesting that Chosen knew where this second location was. From what I can gather from the AvG reaction, it was meant to be a more secret location for Dark? Did Chosen watch him from afar and discover it? Just thinking.) - TLDR: Chosen had already started expecting Dark might become an enemy before Dark revealed the virus.
2) Chosen’s opinion of Alan. - Plain and simple, I don’t think Chosen hates Alan. I don’t think he even holds a grudge anymore. - Yeah, he definitely hated Alan when he was chained up. He held a grudge for a long while after he escaped. But. I think as he watched Dark’s actions and the impact his destruction had on others, he started to see what Alan saw when Chosen was destroying Alan’s PC. - When he entered Alan’s computer, and started trying to defend Alan’s PC, he was now in Alan’s shoes. He was the cursor, the anti-virus, who didn’t want or choose to have this destruction happen. - After the fight, he sees other sticks on the computer and is forced to consider it may have been his own fault he got 'tamed', since the proof of Alan getting along with, or at least tolerating, stick figures was in front of him. - It doesn’t mean what Alan did was right, but Chosen now sees why Alan chained him. After all, isn’t Chosen himself now on his way to destroy Dark? He and Alan aren’t so different. He nods to Alan, acknowledging him, even forgiving him. Alan nods back. There’s a level of acceptance that has been established between them. Alan respects stick figures significantly more, and Chosen sees Alan isn’t a heartless monster. - So, when Alan’s cursor joins the fight against Dark, they were already on the same page. Preventing needless violence with violence. Not to mention, have you seen how many hits Alan purposely took for Chosen? As soon as the black blades came out, Alan got between them and Chosen as often as he could. Alan came to help Chosen, not just to defeat Dark. - If Chosen could ally so quickly with Dark, and then turn on him when he realized Dark’s morals were wrong, why can’t the reverse be true with Chosen realizing Alan had changed for the better?
3) Chosen’s opinion of Orange. - I believe it was Inks who said that Chosen feels something along the lines of submissive towards Orange at the end. While I do agree that Chosen’s bow doesn’t seem worshipful, I don’t think it’s Chosen ‘giving up’. I think it’s simply showing respect and gratitude in a very similar sense to how the five bowed to him after dealing with the virus. He’s just... far less emotive. It’s a nice parallel.
4) The effects of the virus spiders and blades on Chosen. - Personally, I think the reason it looks like the virus has so little effect on Chosen is because of his coloring. Orange is, well, orange, so the black wounds are obviously going to show. - You can see Chosen showing weakness in both his fight with the spider virus and his fight with Dark. The weakness shows itself in hesitation, slower response, straight up laying in a crater or the water for an extended period of time. - I think at the end, when the Dark sends the virus to infect the internet, Chosen is laying there unmoving because he literally can’t move. His body language reads of someone looking up weakly, unable to do anything but wanting to. The viruses temporarily disabled him (but, notably, it took all of them to do so). Dark can’t actually kill Chosen or delete him, but he’s been successfully incapacitated, so Dark can move forward with his plan, unhindered. - I just don’t think Chosen would ever, ever give up. If he can fight back, he will. He has never backed down once, even when there seems to be no way he can win. He almost lost to a spider virus--there’s even subtle hints later that he’s afraid of fighting them--but he still attacks the whole swarm until he literally can’t anymore.
5) Dark fighting Orange. - With stabbing Orange, it becomes clear that he’s not being as quickly affected by the blade as his friends. That’s why the Dark lord raises him off the ground; he grew impatient. (Also, Chosen reacts to Orange being stabbed? Is it because he knows Orange is one of Alan’s creations as opposed to the other four sticks? Or does he literally feel something?) - Dark becomes absolutely furious at Orange’s attempts to attack him and frustrated that Orange won’t simply die. Too reminiscent of Chosen. Also, I would like to note that, before he even stabbed Orange, Dark hits him the hardest out of the four still standing.
6) Orange’s powers. - Before I say anything about Orange’s avatar-state, I want to point out that his talents seem a whole lot more like Victim’s than Chosen's? I don’t know, if it weren’t for the fact that he has some label saying “The Chosen One’s Return,” I’d say he’s actually the ‘second coming’ of Victim. - Okay, now to his powers. Almost all of them are souped up versions of Chosen’s, with two exceptions. The whole reviving/restoring code ability, and the ability to fly/float without flames. The latter of these two abilities is something we see Dark do after he puts on his black band. The former could also very well be associated with Dark, considering Second had to go to Dark’s console to revive his friends. Food for thought. - There’s a trade off here in the power scaling. Second is so much stronger than Chosen, but obviously can’t tap into his powers whenever he wants. Not to mention, he seemingly can’t use them indefinitely. If Dark somehow managed to avoid getting blasted into the beyond, Orange would be in major trouble if his super-state has a time limit. - Then there’s the whole sleeping thing in videos that likely take place later chronologically? On the build competition video where Orange literally can’t stay awake for fifteen seconds despite punching himself in the face, there was something Alan did that always struck me as odd. He hearted a comment saying something like ‘should we be concerned about Orange’s narcolepsy?’ almost implying that we should be concerned? Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but I haven’t seen him just heart “funny-haha” comments before. (I would also like to point out it is very possible for this to be planned out. These AvM video scripts were likely written after AvA’s scripts even if the videos were finished first.)
7) What next for Chosen doing things with the color squad? - I think, despite the many, many issues that will come up if Chosen ‘play-fights’ with the others (as I stated as an Anon to Sammy), it would be incredibly healthy for him once he can do it safely and have fun. He was born wanting to fight. It’s his calling. And he’s really good at it. Finding a way to do it without hurting others? That’s the best thing he could ever have. - Okay, and, what if, Chosen doesn’t quite understand why Orange doesn’t remember going super, but he decides that he’s going to get to the bottom of Orange’s powers and, in the process, starts training Orange. (It probably starts with Chosen being all, ‘come here’ and flies up, while Orange is just, ‘what? I can’t do that.’ ‘Yes you can. Do it.’ Of course, that blunt method of teaching is not going to work, so Chosen has to learn to communicate better.) Training may or may not actually be successful, but imagine him and Orange bonding. - Both the color squad and Chosen adopting each other. They both parent the other in their own ways, and just. Be cute together. Chosen learns how to people and relax, and gets, like, super attached to these weak little sticks? So, the color squad now has an overprotective higher being watching over them, and the awe they have of his power is quickly cut short when they learn he’s never played cards before? - The sticks also show off their skills to Chosen and he��s just. Confused. Why would you tap blocks just to make a sound? Make something to harvest wheat when you can do it by hand? Why are you eating that. Animals? Okay, actually, holding this cat is nice.
-
(I deleted my old conclusion on accident, and I don't remember what it said. I don't think it was important, though. Thanks for reading! Please share any thoughts if you have any!)
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chaoticspacefam · 3 years
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wonder if part of why the swtor jedi-sith conflict plays the way it does with “sith stans” and etc because the sith empire are functionally saturday morning cartoon villains - “murder and mayhem await!” compared to the more, i guess, believable evil of the republic/jedi following good ideals to bad conclusions and justifying war crimes
I'd certainly say it doesn't help things, you're right! I have...a lot of issues with the Jedi and their portrayal (especially in the Legends/SWTOR era), but I also recognise that a lot of that is very personal to me and that another fan might feel differently. Long, ranty post ahead so if that's not your deal, skip this one.
TL;DR: thinking critically about the behaviour of the Good Guys bad, I guess, since they're the good guys and you're obviously not allowed to use your own agency to decide something they do makes you deeply, viscerally uncomfortable.  And God help you if you disagree with anything they do and cite personal experience behind your (very justified) avoidance of that rhetoric/teaching, because Bad Things Justified If Good People Do Them and how dare you have different personal experiences and responses. If that's what you do, you're doing fandom wrong /s Also, bad writing choices of the writers themselves that perpetuate toxic, harmful viewpoints and/or stereotypes don't mean anything when said viewpoints/stereotypes are the Bad Guys because...Bad Guys Aren’t Supposed To Be People With Rights, Thoughts and Feelings Too, They’re Just Evil, (cringe)
Disagreeing with someone’s opinions is fine, but if you’re going to deliberately expose yourself to content you don’t like and then attack the person that is making the content because they made it and it upset you when you went looking for it....you are, in fact, the one at fault babes. No one is holding you hostage, you can block tags or unfollow a person (especially me. I really don’t care honest to god, if my posts are not your jam just leave. please.) if you hate what they post so much and are unable to just scroll past things you don’t like to stay for things you do. I’ve done it and will continue to do so, and my fandom experience is happier for it. Also, people are human and sometimes we’re tired and we make mistakes like we miss a trigger tag, and you are within your right to come to the person and point that out, but you are not within your right to threaten them because they made a mistake. Then you’re just a dick.
But I still wouldn't be the one going around (passive) aggressively attacking other fans for disagreeing with my opinions and again, this is based on personal experience, but I've seen a lot more of that stuff from "pro-Jedi" people who seem to be conveniently okay with shit like mass-genocide and cultural erasure because "the Jedi are the good guys and the (OT) Sith are fascists!"
I don't interact with the subsect of fans that do think "the (OT) Empire did nothing wrong hurr durr" unironically (and for good reason, I don't agree with that viewpoint either and the fact that half the time the "defence" of these other fans is "well you're pro-fascist then!!" lmao) but there's a very big gap between the OT Empire which is rightfully a mirror of fascism and dictatorial governments and I do, in fact, raise my eyebrows in heavy criticism and disdain at the writers of the TOR-era deliberately choosing to "justify" the ultimate end being said fascist Empire by making the Sith species (and as always I preface this by saying I am in fact white & therefore know I have priveledge and can only "relate" on a much shallower level as POC fans, but there are places where I do find them more relatable than the TOR-era Jedi which reek of conservative, pearl-clutching Christianity (which I spent way too much of my life having forced upon me by the bible-bashing Evangelists(tm) in my family) to me and I just don't have the fucks to give to spend time fixing something that's honestly traumatising for me to be reminded of):
-heavily Indigenous/POC-coded
-"tribal" and not in a properly-researched and respectfully portrayed sense but in a very deliberate "these people are savage and need to be colonised and "sophisticated" by the More Acceptible (Human) Dark Jedi" even though they had their own society, belief systems, and even had technology - just not in the "socially acceptible, conventional sense" I guess
-perpetuating this by adding slavery and all of that can of worms into the mix too, just to drive home the "evil and bad" prototype ig. I'm not even gonna speak more on this part because it just makes me angry.
-Deliberately giving them more "alien" or inhuman characteristics, which while by itself is not necessarily a bad thing, put it together with all the other things?? Big. Fucking. Oof.
-Were literally exterminated and the survivors selectively bred for ONLY the "bad and evil" traits for not agreeing with the Jedi's beliefs. Their own practises and beliefs were automatically "evil" and "wrong" just because they didn't want to "convert" (sniff sniff, Christianity, is that you?)
A direct quote for those who can't be bothered to click and read the link:
For nearly two thousand years, superstition, loyalty and sympathy were bred out as the two groups interbred, and qualities such as cunning, ambition and affinity to the Force were favored, which shaped Sith society over the centuries.[3][21][22] In the Sith Empire, as time progressed pure-blooded Sith were steadily bred out,[6] resulting in only a few pure-blooded Sith left in the Sith Empire by the time of the Great Hyperspace War.[13] Long after, the true species in the Empire were believed to have gone extinct due to the interbreeding process.
And conversely the Jedi:
-Deny young children contact with their parents, siblings and families from the moment their Force sensitivity shows (hmmmm. )
-Continually and actively support the condemnation and Exile of "imperfect" Jedi, hell, it's even pointed out on Wookieepedia, that any Force sensitive, even those who are not aligned to either faction, but that train with or follow teachings that are not Jedi Approved (tm) is labelled as a "Dark Jedi" by the Jedi Order
Although "Dark Jedi" originally referred to a Jedi who had fallen to the dark side, it could also refer to uninitiated Force-sensitives who received no Jedi training but began their careers under another Dark Jedi. Others were simply dark-side users who did not follow the teachings of the Sith or other dark side organizations.
because "oh noooo you do not follow the way of the Truth and the Light you horrible person how dare you defy The One True Correct Teaching, that makes you the Devil Incarnate no matter what" UGH.
-Continuously push the idea (very heavily) that Emotions Are Bad, which just creates a bunch of emotionally-stunted powderkegs unable to recognise, confront and deal with said emotions (and as I've said, I would know, I was one and maybe still am in some ways lmao) , then blames said powderkeg for exploding because they were never taught how to handle the emotions in the first place.
(Fuck "there is no emotion, there is peace", that's not how people work and never will be lmao)
I don't really know what else to say about this to be honest, because even though I've only been on tumblr about a year now, I'm already tired of this constant "I'm right, you're wrong" finger-pointing between those people in the fandom.
Cause to some of these "pro-Jedi" people it's an unthinkable crime to dare to have a different opinion to them and just want to be left alone, I guess. I've literally been attacked for saying "I don't like the Jedi and find dealing with their dogma too traumatising based on personal experience and trauma from my childhood so I'm going to avoid it but you do you"
I've had American Christians (tm) clap back to that with the ever-wonderful "LMAO bitch you don't have religious trauma, you didn't grow up in the bible-belt, stop trying to be edgy, shut up and go to therapy"
(all of this is sarcasm, for those who need me to spell it out for you. I'm still traumatised by the shit I went through and have to constantly check myself and my own feelings because of the toxic "habits" those teachings tried to push onto me as a child and I have zero tolerance and patience for your (not you, ssalmon, but the royal "you" as it were) victim-blaming abuse apologism "gotchas")
because 1) clearly American Christianity and the bible-belt are the only insidious and harmful subsect of Christianity and it's not like the concept of Evangelism as a whole is inherently toxic, harmful, and traumatising to those subjected to it right 2) Obviously there's a Stated Right Way To Be Traumatised and anyone who falls outside of that (Non-Existent) handbook is "faking it for attention" 3) bold of them to assume that curating my own fandom (and life) experience, and refusing to engage with things that trigger me, isn't something that I literally fucking learned in therapy lmao
Also, I find it funny how these are the people going around attacking people like me, who are literally minding our own motherfucking business, but then claim to preach “love and tolerism” and all this other bullshit. Karen, sweetie, only one of us is going around telling people they deserve to be murdered/stabbed for disagreeing with thier opinion about a videogame and pointing out that “hey, that’s...very yikes maybe don’t do that, step back and calm down” and it ain’t me (true story, this happened a couple of months ago and I don’t wanna dredge the post up because it’s very upsetting to think about) People are allowed to have opinions, and they don’t have to agree with your opinion just because that’s what you think, and the second that you sink to sending people death threats because they don’t share your opinion, you are, in fact, the asshole in that conversation.
It was even funnier because the person in question followed me first, I initially thought they were pretty cool so I followed back, then they threw a massive temper-tantrum and threw a bunch of very upsetting and triggering shit at me without my consent because I didn’t agree with them (I’d even put my opinions in tags on MY blog in an attempt to be courteous and not hijack their post with negativity, in hindsight perhaps I should have made my own post in the first place and I do acknowledge that BUT if that’s all they’d said I would have apologised and moved on, quite gladly, there was no need for them to explode the way they did at me for...making a mistake because I’m a stranger on the internet who didn’t know them & wasn’t a mind-reader and I happened to miss a trigger tag that I didn’t think of at the time lmao)
This post is getting awful long and rambly so I'm going to shut up now, but that's my take on it I guess, I hope that's what you were getting at and if it's not I apologise, I've been taking a huge step back and actively just avoiding any and all major posts related to this discourse as of a few months ago because it just infuriates and upsets me too much, it’s not worth the detriment to my mental health, I’m just here to make friends who are also hyperfixated on SWTOR and have fun vibing and talking about our characters, not get into one-sided morality debates with pearl-clutchers. 🤷
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toujoursmiraculous · 3 years
Text
Thoughts and Reactions to Truth!
Just going to go straight into it because this episode is huge! I really like how at the end of a season and the beginning of another, we see the same scene that leads us out of one and into another. Gabriel fixes the Miraculous and ohhh poor Dusuu thought it was all a dream, being in evil hands. So in a way, the Miraculous being damaged may have been a blessing for her. Dx Too bad it couldn't have been fixed after Marinette got it back :/ But at least Nooroo isn't alone right? Legit only positive I can get from this. ;-; Tikki and her little hats omg it's so cuuuute! I wonder if she makes her little clothes, too awww But the other Kwami's are almost like siblings to Tikki if you think about it. Now Tikki has to share things with them all as they cause chaos all around when she's so used to her quiet life alone with Marinette. Even for a Kwami, that must be hard to adjust to.
Okay so it's almost Prince Ali's birthday that Paris is going to celebrate. Interesting! I'd really like to see him back and a storyline with that. :O Marinette holding something, clearly, that the girls can't see over video chat. Talking to what appears to be herself, reacting to what someone's saying from different sides of her room. Camera flashes going off. And then her phone getting yeeted at her all on a video call with her friends when she's supposed to be alone...considering they're all going to have Kwami's and learn some things later as they become heroes, I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if they think back to this scene someday! OH WAIT spoiler for the upcoming episode Gang of Secrets!!! Fair warning. What if this episode with the plushies she said she's going to make, is one of if not the reason they go over and are looking around her room? Because she's been acting sus and they want to know what's going on. Especially after what happens later in the episode with Luka. Okay, back to the episode itself. Her friends observation: You're acting way weirder than normal.... IS ADRIEN AT YOUR PLACE?! I mean, fair point. xD But the thing is, whenever Marinette tends to act weirder or say/do things that Alya and the girls don't understand, it's almost always connected to her being Ladybug/Guardian. Even Lila. If she wasn't Ladybug and dealt with her so much as her, she wouldn't know a lot of things that made her not trust Lila to begin with. So Marinette has to overcompensate to try to hide everything or can't explain her thoughts or feelings about certain situations, so Alya always just assumes her behavior has something to do with Adrien. It really sucks but at the same time, what else is she going to think?
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These Kwami are a lot of trouble. xD Now she's even more frazzled, so she calls Luka Adrien. More than once. I've done this where I call my siblings the wrong name more of than I'd like so I can't fault her for it. Her mind's probably a mess, poor girl. Dx "I'm sorry it's just that I cheated on you!" BIG OOF. But this gives me Kim Possible vibes when Ron assumed Kim didn't want him anymore and told her he was cheating on her when he meant to say he was cheating to be on the football team so he could be more worthy of her when he thought she wanted to "trade up" her boyfriend. Our poor Marinette! So frazzled she can't remember when her dates are, when they've been rescheduled. She can't remember her patrols with Chat Noir which are really important. She's getting to the point where it's going to be a wonder she can even function. Dx "But Marinette and I are such a big fan of his" wow this sure hits different. The way they kept quizzing each other to finish the sentence with Jagged Stone trivia was pretty cute. Luka having her finish the line with "Kiss me" that she screamed to the entire theater made me choke on my cake. "Well, if that's what you want." Smooth. "I think, yes. I want to." But you know, it gets interrupted by an akuma attack of course because that's just the way things work! :D And wouldn't you know it, it's Mr. Pigeon. AGAIN. Totally worth interrupting the moment lol Ladybug can't pick and choose, however, so here comes the sequence where she's constantly running off and he starts doubting her. Notice the parallel when Marinette started to like Luka after Adrien could never show up to things? Now Marinette's having trouble showing up and Luka's having issues with it. The second Chat Noir started to sneak up on Ladybug, we all knew he was going to get flipped. But it's so adorable and funny at the same time I love it x333 And that whole scene there of Ladynoir. Obviously it's a Lukanette-centered episode but the Ladynoir in this episode! So good! And you know, it's interesting. First time we see Adrien this episode is for FIVE whole seconds! And the way it abruptly cut off as he opened the car door... yeah you know what, Lies is going to be Adrien's POV or something of this same day. It has to be. He has 2 total scenes one of them is 5 seconds and the other one is 2 seconds. Crazy. We got about 7 seconds of Adrien's face today woo! But ugh here's where we get hurt Luka ;-; "A girl, who as always, isn't here." Ouch. The fact that if Marinette said she loved Adrien still, he'd understand and he'd get it is so sweet, and so sad that it's not even because of that, it's because she's Ladybug and the Guardian and she can't say a thing about it to him at all, that he can't accept. It's the one thing he couldn't deal with that's the issue and that really sucks. AND THIS MOMENT RIGHT HERE HAD ME GASPING AND HURTING FOR LUKA. IT'S THE MOMENT HIS HEART BROKE
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But also really guys, did you notice his eyes are different now? Almost like a blue diamond look or something.
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Luka trying to fight it, trying to tell Hawk Moth that the truth needs to be willingly told, not forced. But stupid Hawk Moth's able to get him to hold on anyway and gets akumatized. But not before he told Marinette to run. Which was such an awwww moment. x33 I mean, this is definitely getting a bit close to Chat Blanc territory if you ask me. New transformation music is pretty good! I like it. Also can we just appreciate that instead of trying to track down Marinette to get the truth from her, he's instead asking all her friends and family, pretty much any source besides her? AND ROSE'S RESPONSE "Marinette has no secrets because she's the most honest girl in the world!" She thinks so highly of her and it's just so beautiful. Nobody would blame her for these secrets if they only knew either. But awwwwww I love this scene!! And here's the big reveal! (no not that one) Jagged Stone is Luka and Juleka's father. 😮
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Thomas today tweeted that Luka and Juleka are twins. Which would have to be fairly obvious after this reveal. There's no way that Jagged, who says he'd be a lame dad and left because he wasn't cut out for it, would have Luka with Anarka, then stay long enough to also have Juleka. I also totally forgot that in the French version, Jagged has an American accent when he speaks. XDD Just the fact that even WITH his truth powers, he asked his mother TWICE who his father was. Both times she said Jagged Stone. He still didn't believe it until he went to Jagged himself omg. This poor poor boy. Luka: 😱*gasp* Marinette: 😲 *gasp* Adrien: 😮 WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY OMG. LIKE I'M WATCHING A TELENOVELA OR SOMETHING. THEY EVEN ZOOMED IN ON THEIR REACTIONS I CAN'T And then Luka just yeets his dad because he wasn't ever there for him. I honestly did not expect Luka having dad issues to ever be a thing in this show, even though I knew he wasn't around. So like... when everything's worked out with Marinette and Adrien in the end, will Luka and Adrien end up becoming friends and bonding over things, like the whole daddy issues thing...? Are we really supposed to believe she has no feelings for Chat Noir? I mean really, look at this.
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"I can't imagine what your daily life must look like" ... is she really actually being the one to bring up something about his secret identity? With that face? 😲
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Their flirty banter that at this point I don't even think they realize it is, and those soft looks I just... My top ship is Ladynoir and I was not expecting any significant moments of theirs but I got it anyway. Just watching their scenes, I kept going "See, this is why they're meant for each other." My heart is happy despite all the Luka pain! It's helping me cope with it, okay? "When you're ready, I'll be here for you, Marinette." Awww so they're telling us Lukanette is on hold here. Not a guarantee, but at least on hold. He's an option for her later. So now the Adrienette vs. Lukanette for S4 we heard about awhile back makes sense now. Later on this season, probably when things calm down and she gets the hang of things, she'll be in a better position to be with someone. And by then, Adrien will probably realize and understand his feelings for Marinette. So then she'll be in a position to choose between them. Now we know where Luka gets his ability to turn emotions into great songs. That's adorable! Father-son bonding! Gabriel needs to take notes when a man who was never in his son's life as more than his idol has the ability to try to be there, but Gabriel can't. Ugh our poor Marinette, probably thinking she's going to be alone for a very long time just because of a supervillain. That's so wrong she has to feel like this. If you notice, Hawk Moth's akumatizations help people patch up relationships so much of the time as a weird unexpected result of an akuma attack. And yet, he does nothing but hurt Marinette and at times Adrien, the most when he akumatizes people. He makes me so angry! But I'm too tired for a rant about that. At least the Kwami hugs at the end helped a teeny bit anyway! c:
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charmspoint · 3 years
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Top 5 characters that live in your head rent free 🤔
For this ask meme
Oh god ONLY five??? GOOD QUESTION. This is gonna be hard to both decide on and rank fairly uhoh lets see, this ranking his shifty as hell depending on what I’m into atm obvs
5. Tsurugi Kamiya from Servamp
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Does he look like a knock off Izaya? Yes. Is he? Very much no.
Tsurugi is like my no 1 reason for getting back into Servamp, I left right in the middle of his arc and I ;-; IS HE OKAY??? DID HE GET AWAY FROM TOUMA??? DID HE BECOME WRATHS EVE??? NOBODY TELL ME I’LL FIND OUT ON MY OWN.
Servamp was one of those shows where I didn’t really have a fav main character for a good while until this guy showed up. This guy is an absolute crazy little monster I can’t overemphasize on this, his coat is used as a fucking straight jacket I’m not even kiddin
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You get introduced to him and he’s scary and terrifying because he’s so strong, like he’s one of those strongest in the series characters and since he and the heroes are on semi opposing sides he is a serious threat. So you get introduced to this guy who seems borderline crazy and feral and then...you get to see him goofing off with his two boyfriends and their kid and it’s just
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The domesticity!!!!Look at it!!!! It’s so fucking cute aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, they are so cute together OT3 of C3 ftw, MY SON. Like Tsurugi had a horribly abusive childhood and was basically raised like an attack dog and his previous partner :) well he do be trying to seriously kill him don’t he. But look! He found his own little family he can be semi normal in!! Until is torn apart by his abusive adoptive father figure :D!!! I ABANDONED HIM IN THE MIDDLE OF THAT ARC AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
im sorry this got so long on this particular character none of the others will be so long i just miss him TSURUGI ILL CATCH UP FOR YOU!!!! Maybe he should have been no 1 hbjhbjh fucking sleeper agents am i right
4. Izaya Orihara from Durarara
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Ah yes, the og queen bitch. Has my taste for villains ever recovered from Izaya? No. If your villain isn’t at least a bit like Izaya I’m not interested. Durarara was one of my first serious fandoms and Izaya was the first character I ever wrote for and I think you can explain me as a person if you consider Izaya was my all time fav at 13. I can’t really say anything about Izaya that hasn’t been said thousands of times before, I love how goofy and overperformative he can be, I love how there’s so much in him once you crack him open, I love how good of a villain he is for a messy story such as DRRR, puppeteer villains are really a league of their own. We need more puppeteering twinks, maybe then I’d be more into villains yaknow.
3. Hawks from Boku no Hero Academia 
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To no ones surprise!Him! I’ve been drifting off from BNHA recently what from catching bad case of JJK what from just reading n watching more other stuff and honestly that’s probably good because I’ve been into BNHA for a couple of years now as my main fandom and I really could have used a break. Not to say I don’t like BNHA anymore tbh I think right now BNHA is the best it’s ever been just ya know, drifting. That being said my love for Hawks will never die, god what a good boy and we got his backstory too aaa ;-;. BNHA was just like Servamp, something I liked but didn’t really have a fav character in until this random support character strolled in and won my heart. God I love how much we got on Hawks. He’s completely different from his initial impression and his unrelenting strive to do good despite being thrown from one horrible situation to the next is just ;-; HES SUCH A GOOD BOY. He’s selfless to a fault, literally putting everyone before himself and putting himself down for not being able to achieve more than is humanly possible I’m just ;-; I WANT HIM TO BE HAPPY. He just makes my heart happy, he’s good and warm and hardworking and in a manga where trauma plays such a major role in so many characters it’s so good to see Hawks there, having been through three different types of hell and still coming out unnerving in his goodness. All I want for him is to have a good life and to one day be able to smile for real.
2. Gojo Satoru from Jujutsu Kaisen
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Again no surprise since I’ve been so into jjk lately. Satoru is p high up rn cuz I’m mainly into JJK now but god knows where he will actually settle. He’s not even really my favorite character in the show, that goes to Inumaki, but this is a list of who I think about the most (tho all of these characters are either no 1 or no 2 for their shows) and boy my brother and foxy can tell you I’m constantly thinking about this bitch. I didn’t really care about him that much at the start but then I got to Hidden Inventory and OH BOY MUCH TO THINK ABOUT. Satoru is such a wonderfully complex character whos evolution you can clearly follow through the years. He’s under so much pressure as the strongest sorcerer to deal with everything and he has to operate in that system trying to change it for the better while at the same time trying to make sure his students arent sacrificed in the name of that change. He has a very goofy disposition but along side with Nanamin who’s a lot more explicit about it, it’s clear he cares about mental state of his students a whole lot. He knows this world is terrible and that the will come out of it with scars and that he can’t protect them from all of it, but he balances protecting and letting them grow as much as he can. They need to grow so jujutsu society can change after all, but they also need to be protected so they don’t fuckin die before that can happen. This is without all the many many opinions I have on Hidden Inventory and SatoSugu as a whole, how they influenced each other, how differently they reacted to their shared trauma (Funny how everyone on this list is fuckin traumatized) and what resulted from it. How their fucking love story is dramatic enough to be a Shakespeare play. Also I like it when he’s long and goofy ahahah
1. Chuuya Nakahara from Bungou Stray Dogs
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Not to objectify men on main but I couldn’t choose a picture 
If there is ever a day when I don’t go feral over Chuuya I’ll probably be dead. He not only lives in my head rent free he owns the place.
HES SO UNDERUSED.
BSD has such a great setup with Chuuya, like he’s ex partners with the mentor of the main character who got betrayed and abandoned when the mentor left shared evil organization. Sounds like grounds for drama right? YOUD THINK SO. Like Chuuya and Dazai have such a great and interesting dynamic and you can feel how strained it is from the distance and betrayal and they bicker and fight as their defining relationship trait BUT there is such a strong underlying trust to all the fighting. These two trust each other with their whole lives and that hasn’t changed despite everything, despite how much time has passed and how much that trust had been tested. So you’d think he’d be an important character :) HES STUCK IN SUPPORT HONESTLY HES STUCK IN BACKGROUND UNLESS HES NEEDED TO DO SOMETHING COOL AAAAAA. Chuuya is literally one of a kind, I’ve never seen a character with such a good design and such an cool power and such an interesting relationship to one of the main characters and such a love and support from the fandom BE SO UTERLLY AND COMPLETLY WASTED. Even when we get Chuuya scraps they rarely build on relationship he has in canon but just throw in new random ones at him (tho that’s a broader problem of Kafka throwing new characters at the plot instead of developing the one he already has really). We get a hint of a cool fight with him? Completely cut out, More often then not it just feels like he is benched because he’s so damn strong there would just be no plot tension if he went in and broke some heads (which is also a problem with Satoru, guys stop writing op characters if you’ll just put em on the bus aaa). Anyway he’s completly and utterly wasted by the plot.
And it’s such a waste because he’s such a good character. Like he’s a member if the villain organization and is obviously by that very vicious and violent but also so empathetic and kind to people he considers his friends. He and Dazai have the brawn and brain thing going on and stg Chuuya is like the only brawn I can think of that is classier then their brain. Look at how this guy dressed, he’s high class gay, hat, choker, coat, gloves, he is bringing in the looks. I love how he can actually be completely calm and rational and put together but then put him with Dazai and it’s back to ‘we are 15 and we will scream out heads off at each other’, they are so childish. 
Anyway I love Chuuya he deserves to be treated better and I will never stop screaming about Chuuya ever
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ibijau · 4 years
Text
Nobody really asked for it, but time for more de-aged LXC trying to figure out what the fuck happened to him!
This and previous instalments are also on AO3
Lan Xichen opens the door, expecting his uncle, or better yet his brother. Instead he finds himself face to face with a stranger dressed in black and red, smiling in a conspiratorial manner that promises nothing good.
“Zewu-Jun, won't you invite me in?”
The man doesn't look surprised by his youth, meaning he knew to expect it. Only four people know, though: Lan Qiren who discovered him, Nie Huaisang who found out, Lan Wangji who was told, and presumably Lan Wangji's husband. Lan Xichen doesn't think his uncle or brother would tell anyone. He trusts Nie Huaisang to have kept the secret as well. The weak link, then, is this Wei Wuxian who Lan Qiren dislikes so much and thus forbade Lan Xichen from seeing. Could Wei Wuxian have told someone? Lan Xichen understands that his brother-in-law dabbles in unconventional means of cultivation, perhaps he felt one his colleagues might know how to handle his current state? But then why not...
“Ah, right, you wouldn't recognise me!” the stranger laughs. “We make quite a pair here, Zewu-Jun. I'm Wei Wuxian.”
“You're not!” Lan Xichen protests, shocked by the nerve of that man. “I've met Wei Wuxian. Even accounting for the passing of time, you look nothing like him.”
The man only laughs harder. Something about it startles Lan Xichen. The face and body are wrong, even the voice is, but the mannerism, the manner of laughing are...
“Right, right, funny story there, it's me but the body isn't mine,” the man explains with a too cheerful grin. “So Lan Zhan really didn't tell you, eh? Even after so long, if his uncle says something, he's still likely to listen. Anyway, why don't you let me in before someone sees that I'm here? I thought we could have a little chat, you and me. I bet you've got questions and fancy that, I think I have answers.”
Lan Xichen hesitates to call Shuoyue to him to chase away this intruder. It's what he should do, what his uncle would want him to do.
But it's been three months now, and Lan Xichen is starting to fear that he will never return to being the man he had grown into. A pity, a shame, a blessing, he doesn't know. But that's how things are, and if this man really has answers...
Lan Xichen steps aside, silently inviting the man to come in. The stranger saunters inside, letting Lan Xichen close the door behind him. He really does move like Wei Wuxian, it's uncanny.
“So, let's do this,” the man says, sitting at the table and taking out a jar of wine from his sleeve.
Lan Xichen half wants to laugh. This really must be Wei Wuxian, then. He's never met anyone else shameless enough to drink so openly inside the Cloud Recesses. He sits down opposite his... his brother-in-law, apparently.
“You're a clever man,” Wei Wuxian says, opening his jar. “And as I remember, you were pretty sharp as a boy too. They've been careful around you, but I'm sure you must have guessed a few things already. Do you want to tell me what you think you know?”
Lan Xichen nods.
“I know there was a war. I think it was against the Wens, but that's just an educated guess. We've been fearing open conflict with them since before my birth. My father died shortly before that war, or during it, and I became sect leader in his place. I think I was still young.”
“You weren't quite twenty yet,” Wei Wuxian confirms.
Lan Xichen startles. That's too close, that's too soon. He's just eighteen now, how could he become a war leader in less than a year?
“After the war, I don't really know what happened,” Lan Xichen confesses, still shaken by how young he rose to power (will rise to power). “But my brother doesn't trust me anymore, and I'm not sure I'm friend with Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang either.”
Brother would not have approved, Lan Wangji said about the marriage that appears to make him happier than anything in the world.
You can find better friends than me, Nie Huaisang had muttered, refusing to look at him.
“Wangji and Nie Huaisang say I don't grow into a bad man,” Lan Xichen whispers. “But I wonder if they're both lying to spare me.”
Wei Wuxian shrugs, and takes a sip of wine.
“What's good, what's bad?” he asks. “From what I can tell, you did what you thought was right. You've trusted all the wrong people and you've been blind to things that should have alerted you, but you weren't the only one to be fooled so I don't suppose you can be blamed. Still, even if you're not bad yourself, there are some who'll say in allowing evil to reign, you're tainted by it.”
Lan Xichen has to close his eyes and take a deep breath. It's not what he wanted to hear, but it feels more sincere than Lan Wangji and Nie Huaisang's attempts to comfort him. Lan Xichen thinks he likes Wei Wuxian.
“What evil did I protect, then?” he asks. “Will you tell me this much?”
“It's a long story,” Wei Wuxian sighs, glancing at the window. It's still early afternoon. “You won't like most of it, Zewu-Jun. But I've learned the hard way that secrets can tear apart a family and you know what? I'm tired of seeing Lan Zhan hurting over something he can't control. If he can't tell you, I will.”
And so, he does.
It is a painful, convoluted story of war, friendship, betrayal and power. Wei Wuxian is mercilessly honest about it all. He admits to his own fault, just as he denounces those of others. Lan Xichen is made uncomfortable when he hears some of the decision he's made (will make), though the worst part is that he understands why he chose (will choose) this. If Jin Guangshan said those prisoners were treated humanly, how could he not believe his elder? If Wei Wuxian killed people in so ruthless a manner, in such great numbers, how could he not join the effort to take him down before he striked again? If Lan Wangji betrayed his own sect...
Lan Xichen cries at hearing that his brother chose to stand against them, at the news of thirty-three strikes of the discipline whips. He knows the history of Gusu Lan, knows how traitors are to be treated. He hopes his brother understood (will understand) that this was the most merciful punishment he could get away with.
He cries again when he hears that Nie Mingjue has died. His best friend, his oldest friend, his confidant, the person he trusted above all others.
He doesn't understand when Wei Wuxian tells him that he unknowingly sided (will side) with Nie Mingjue's murderer, but Wei Wuxian himself is surprisingly kind about it.
“Jin Guangyao was good at being what people needed him to be. There's little shame in having been fooled by him when he fooled so many. Even I couldn't quite believe it when I first realised that he was involved. There's just one person who saw right through him.”
Lan Xichen gasps.
We all lied to you.
“Nie Huaisang?”
Wei Wuxian nods, and continues his tale, but it makes no sense.
Nie Huaisang isn't like this. He's a sweet boy who smiles and laughs easily, who pretends to cower before his brother but stubbornly does as he pleases, knowing Nie Mingjue adores him too much to punish him. He's friendly and open and honest. He's not someone who lies and hides and plots in the dark. He's not someone who pretends to be people's friends only so he can better stab them in the back when the chance comes.
The way everyone else changed... that makes sense. He can imagine Lan Wangji going too far for love. He can see Nie Mingjue becoming inflexible in his vision of justice. Even for himself, he's always been the sort to try to please everyone, so it's no surprise that he became that man who sided with whoever seemed to promise peace. But Nie Huaisang? Nie Huaisang never gave any sign that he was anything but lovely and a little silly, how could this have happened?
“It's hard, losing the person who took care of you,” Wei Wuxian notes in a voice fraught with barely contained pain. “It can break you. I certainly did for me. And when something is broken, you have to be careful or the shards of it will cut even those trying to help.”
Wei Wuxian means himself and Lan Wangji.
He might mean Nie Huaisang and Lan Xichen, also.
Lan Xichen can feel a headache coming. He cried too much, and he learned too much, it feels like his skull is trying to collapse onto itself to block all this. He half regrets giving in to curiosity, but mostly he's glad he did.
Now he knows.
Now he understands.
It's not cowardice that pushed the man he became to do this to himself. He doesn't think that man really regretted those choices, not even the wrong one because they were made in good faith, and from a sincere heart, with what information he had.
Still, they were wrong choices, and they alienated him from just about everyone he ever cared for. These earnest, honest choices killed Nie Mingjue, they made his brother fear his happiness would be resented, they turned Nie Huaisang into a cruel and lonely man.
The man he became didn't want to forget, Lan Xichen thinks. He just wanted a chance for new choices, unburdened by the old ones, and he wasn't sure to deserve that chance as he was.
“That's the whole story,” Wei Wuxian says, oddly gentle now. “That's everything that happened, at least the parts that I know. There's got to be more, but I wasn't there for it, obviously. If you want more details, you'll have to ask someone else.”
Lan Xichen nods, wiping his tears with the back of his hand.
“Thank you for this, Wei gongzi. And thank you for...” he hesitates, and sighs. “Thank you for making my brother happy now, even if apparently it wasn't always so. I can't really judge the past, but I can see the present, and I like the way he smiles when he speaks about you.”
I like the way you smile when you think of him too, Lan Xichen decides as Wei Wuxian's face illuminates with a grin. He doesn't think the man he became could see this without resentment, but he can, and he's glad for it. He's glad he can rejoice in his brother's happiness and not feel the weight of twenty years of hardship spoiling it.
“Thank you as well, Zewu-Jun,” Wei Wuxian says. “That means a lot to me. I'll let you be now, you'll probably want a moment to digest all this, eh? Sorry for dumping it on you all at once, but... like I said, secrets break families. I've seen it once, I'm not seeing it twice.”
Lan Xichen nods. He feels tired, and the headache is there, unpleasantly insistent. He walks Wei Wuxian back to the door, makes him promise to come again, maybe with Lan Wangji next time. It seems to make Wei Wuxian genuinely happy, for which Lan Xichen is glad. He thinks they'll get along, the two of them. How could he not get along with someone who loves Lan Wangji this much?
Once Wei Wuxian is gone, Lan Xichen prepares some tea. It helps with the headache, and gives him time to think.
At dinner time, his uncle comes by to bring him food and give him news. There's no progress on a cure, partly because Lan Qiren still doesn't know how this happened. He still refuses to say what they both know: that Lan Xichen did this to himself. Lan Qiren is a man who can live with his choices, who can take loneliness if it is the price of righteousness, so of course he cannot understand what his nephew did. Lan Xichen doesn't tell him about Wei Wuxian's visit, and he doesn't tell him what he realised about this choice his future self made.
When he is alone again, Lan Xichen ponders what to do, now that he knows why he's here, why he's like this.
A chance for new choices.
He grabs some paper and prepares some ink. In carefully chosen words, he explains his newest choice, so his uncle and brother will not worry. They still will, of course, because they love him, and he's sorry because he loves them as well, but this can't be helped. It is something he must do.
He leaves his letter on the table, propped against a cup so that it cannot be ignored by anyone coming inside, and exits the house. In the near darkness of the rising night, it's easy to move undetected. It is easy, also, to avoid the disciples who patrol the Cloud Recesses so make sure everybody respects the curfew. He almost laughs as he jumps over the wall, elated by his own daring.
He doubts the man he'd have become would have tried to sneak out like this, partly because he can hardly believe he's doing it himself. But this too is a choice, and so is hopping on Shuoyue and turning it Northwest, toward Qinghe.
It's time for new choices.
Maybe Lan Xichen will regret those as much as he ended up regretting the others, but he won't know until he tries.
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ihassheepquake · 4 years
Text
Stargirl 1.06 “The Justice Society” is officially out on DCU and I’m here to talk about it.
Can we talk about how Sportsmaster & Tigress kick the football coach’s arse literally just because he benches their daughter? They’re supervillains but maybe not absolutely evil people. At least they give a shit about their kid. (Also they’re both easily the hottest adults in this show. I’d let Sportsmaster raw me any day, I mean, look at his hair while wearing his suit!)
I’ve talked about the visuals for the Staff before but have I talked about the sound design? Because holy shit, it sounds awesome. 
“I thought we were in this together” Pat didn’t you bench her, like, 2 episodes ago? Pat seems so offended that Courtney is beginning to assemble a team but, yet again, didn’t he just say that he doesn’t wanna do a new team at all like 2 episodes again? (Also rude of you to bring up my baby boi Pat. Yeah Joey died but so far he’s been the catalyst for this whole damn team, show him the respect he deserves). And this whole “I thought you respected me more than this” works both ways pal. I get he’s just trying to protect these kids, and yeah they have no idea what they’ve really gotten themselves into, but Pat isn’t really doing much to help here. 
We keep seeing all these specific shots of The Pen and I’m really excited to see where they’re going with this. I know what The Pen is, obviously, and I really wanna know what the plan. Are we gonna see Jakeem get it this season? Or someone else?? Who knows!
Yolanda & Courtney watching Wildcat fight seemingly without knowing they’re watching Wildcat is top tier shit. Beth becoming friends with the AI in the goggles is so cute (& sad but not her fault). I hope we get some real development for her. She’s one of the stars of the show and she best get the love she deserves. Oh, so you’ll go to Rick for help Pat, but not your own step-daughter smh. 
I feel so bad for Yo & Beth when Courtney has to tell them that she needs the gear back. Especially when Court put so much effort into letting Yo choose to still be Wildcat. And the Pat & Rick confrontation is so satisfying. I’ve gotta agree with Rick on some level. I don’t think he’s been useless or anything, but Courtney has certainly been the one getting shit done for once. 
I think the family bits are some of the best. I feel the Arrowverse shows are a little lacking in the family department and this show fucking nails it over and over. I’m a huge fan of the dark, angsty superhero dynamics, but I love that this show doesn’t really have much of that. It has dark moments sure but it’s not an overall dark show. Like, Barbara comes to see Mike at his science fair and then the two go home and literally eat his candy volcano, I love it.
With the first mission starting up, I’m here for this really messy team dynamic. The first part of the mission is set to “Timber” by Kesha & Pitbull, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted an action scene set to this song (also wow how much did that cost?) I love it when first missions immediately go wrong. Gambler is somewhere entirely different and they get ambushed by Sportsmaster & Tigress. I really love the dynamic between the team and the villains. We do get to see the whole “villains who know better than the heroes” thing in other shows, but never to this degree. The heroes are so clearly outmatched. We get some of our first real fight scenes in this episode and the fight choreo is so good. I really appreciate how Courtney & Yo seem to be the best fighters in the team, and both have been set up well for it. Yo is obviously a champion boxer, as we’ve seen many times since he first episode, and they established Courtney as well versed in some martial art, I think karate, back in episode 1 with all the trophies and photos in her room. But even this two are so clearly outmatched by the skill and experience of Sportsmaster & Tigress. The irony of Courtney venting to Pat about her team doing exactly what Pat has been telling her for the last two episodes is really funny though, and I think I can kinda forgive the things I complained about earlier in this very recap/review.
Ooooooh the Crisis shot! The first big team shot!! OMFG!!! And we get a villain team shot too? Sure, not the full villain team, but it’s still pretty cool. 
I hope eventually we get updated, modernized suits for Beth & Rick.
Next week is 1.07 “Shiv Part One” which seems like it’ll be yet another origin story, probably for Cindy this time. I’m really hoping for a training montage with the JSA and I would like to see a little more of Cameron. Let’s get in some time with the kids being kids at school. At this point we’re more or less halfway through Season 1, so I wanna start seeing something about what Project New America actually is, especially if we’re getting a villain episode next. 
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verobatto · 4 years
Text
Destiel Chronicles
Vol. XLVI
It was a love story, from the very beginning
The Guilt and The Demon!Dean foreshadow
(9x14/9x15 and 9x17)
Hi my dears! Another meta from season 9, this is a very interesting one, talking about a funny mirror I found with the ghostfacers and Destiel, also a new foreshadow for what will come in season 10.
We will talk about Dean's guilt and a lot a foreshadows too for Demon!Dean and his summer love with Crowley.
I want to say thank you to my friend @agusvedder, she made the gifs for this meta, thank you girl!!
Okay, let's start...
Guilt and more Guilt
Episode 9x14 is all about GUILT. We have Dean talking with Ghost!Kevin, trying to ask for forgiveness, because his death is all over Dean's shoulders... He said it while he was trying to contact him.
DEAN: Kevin? Kevin. All right, I can't do this. Coffee-buzzing, bump-in-the-night crap. I got serious things to say to you, okay? And I'm not gonna say them to this.
[DEAN gets up and turns his back on the coffeemaker]
Kevin, I'm sorry. You did not choose this life. You busted your ass, you lost everything, everyone you've loved...
[[MORE]]
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This speech is yelling guilt the whole time. Is Dean trying to say every painful word that had been stabbing his heart and his mind since Kevin died. One of his huge, heavy bags on his back.
Then... We will have Castiel talking with Bartholomew, and again, this angel trying to bring the guilt on Castiel, the fault.
But before this... Bartholomew will try to recruit him... Castiel is not that kind of angel, the one who follows orders, so, Bartholomew can't barely understand what motives Castiel to keep fighting by his own...
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And this is a foreshadow for that famous quote from Metatron: IT WAS ALWAYS TO SAVE ONE HUMAN. TO SABE DEAN WINCHESTER.
That's why Castiel needs to keep fighting, and that's what Castiel feels is waiting for him, for his help. Is waiting to be saved, even if he doesn't feel he deserves it.
And then, the exposition of Castiel's sins, and guilts...
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But Castiel answered magnificently... And this proves he really grew up after being a human. He did what he had to to survive, because they are in war. But what he did... Doesn't define him.
The quote from Bartholomew WE FOLLOW ORDERS, is against Castiel's nature, and impress the huge difference between Heaven and Castiel.
Foreshadow of Demon!Dean/Crowley summer of love, and Castiel's finding another "new love"
Okay, we had a little scene in 9x14 between Sam and Dean...
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What a funny foreshadow of what will be Dean and Crowley's summer of love, Dean giving some credit to the Demon, as if it was the beginning of a great friendship.
And we had a very interesting Destiel mirror with Ghostfacers in episode 9x15 Thin Man.
If you watch the episode, it will look like if Harry and Ed were representing the current issue between Sam and Dean. Their fight because of Gadreel possession. But if you dig deeper... They're not just mirroring the brothers there...
First of all I want you to pay attention to the clothes changes in Harry. Harry will be our shapeshifter mirror. He will be mirroring Cas and Dean, and it will be easier for you if you hear his words and see his color coded dressing.
With that on mind... Let's check this scene...
ED: What did Dana post?
HARRY [turning his phone around to show ED a picture of a girl]
No, it's just -- she changed her profile pic, and it's cropped, (...)
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Okay, Dana mhm, is obviously making reference to Dean here... But Dean is with another man... Platonically?? That's a very funny word related to Destiel dynamic, but also... Dana/Dean is betraying... Harry dressed in BLUE COLOR (CASTIEL MIRROR), so, blatantly talking about what is about to come... Dean will betray Castiel with Crowley, but just platonically (🤣) so funny.
But this doesn't ends here... Because when Dean arrives... The dialogue between him and Harry (Castiel mirror) becomes very second meaning and flirty.
HARRY: Ahh, first of all, you guys don't scare us.
ED: Not at all.
HARRY [lifting his shirt to reveal a gun in his waistband] Say, "hola" to my little pistola.
DEAN: Am I supposed to be impressed with that treasure trail or the lady gun you got hiding in your, uh, pants there?
HARRY: Uh...Both?
Okay, this was for dirty minds, and we know who had a happy treasure trail, right? Hello sexy Mish.
And then we had this new reference to Dana again...
ED: Come on, man, would you please stop Facebook stalking your ex-girlfriend?
HARRY: I was right.
ED: Hmm?
HARRY: She changed her relationship status to "it's complicated." What does that even mean?
ED: Who cares? You broke up with her. Everything about that girl is complicated. Okay, I mean, she gets the cream puffs, she tells you to take out the filling. They're just puffs.
So Dean is complicated, and he will be in a complicated relationship with Crowley... Foreshadow again.
Now... Don't forget that ass slap to Harry/still Cas mirror dressed in blue, but now adding green and red to make reference to Destiel.
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May I add this was too gay? And how Agus marked me... Dean is hitting his lower lip like, excuse me sir?
Finally, we arrived to the big fight between Harry (dressed in red, toxic Dean, it means he is mirroring Dean now) and Ed.
This fight brought to elements... One the brothers fight we saw at the end of Road Trip, mostly when Ed confess he did it for Harry (to lie). And two... The break up will be between Crowley and Dean at the beginning of season 10... So... Pay attention to this dialogue, thinking we have toxic/demon!Dean/Dean mirror in Harry and Crowley mirror in Ed...
Who was the woman Harry/Dean was about to marry, the woman who he had a serious and deep relationship? Dana, now... This reference is linked to Castiel. Castiel is the safe love the unconditional love, the man who will always be there for Dean. The angel showed him that in Road Trip. He's his loyal partner. The love of his life.
Now... This...
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ED: Well, maybe it's not too late, you know? You could call her and see.
Okay, this just recalled me when Dean and Crowley broke up, Crowley went straight to give some stolen grace to Cas, to give Dean his ex boyfriend back.
HARRY: That's not gonna work.
ED: Well, maybe -- maybe it will.
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Okay!! And let's stop here... Remember in episode 10x03 when Dean was back to normal and Castiel entered in his room? And Cas just threw I HAVE A WOMAN ON MY CAR? And Dean's face was like WHAT DID YOU JUST SAID??
Ah okay, so... Because Dean had this live summer with Crowley, with empty promises and all... Now he lost Cas, who searched for another love interest? (Hannah?) So yeah... Now Dana is Cas. And yes, Cas said this because he wanted some revenge and make Dean a little jealous.
Okay but that is for season 10 Chronicles we will have to wait...
Foreshadow of Cas and Sam healing Demon!Dean
This is just a brief comment about episode 9x17 Mother's little helper.
This scene...
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Is a foreshadow of Sam facing his brother as a demon, Demon!Dean will act like a soulless evil, erratic and heartless.
This episode showed us an unrequited love and a sacrifice for that love, linked too to season 10 and how will Dean feel after becoming normal.
And because is talking about soulless people, is a foreshadow to Amara's plot too.
Sam releasing the souls is showing us he will be solving the way to bring his brother back at the beginning of season 10: again FAMILY LOVE (Sam) and ROMANTIC LOVE (Castiel) will save the day.
To Conclude:
Episode 14 talked about guilt as a central topic this season, but it began to show clues about Dean/Crowley dynamic in season 10, we had even Dean saying to Del (the demon) "Well, me and Crowley, we're -- we're tight now. Thick as thieves. Saw him just last month. We, uh, had a grand ol' time."
Episode 15 did the same with Ed and Harry as mirror shifters for Cas/Dean and Dean/Crowley. Talking us about a love triangle between CAS/DEAN/CROWLEY and DEAN/CAS/HANNAH.
Finally we had another foreshadow of how they will heal Dean at the beginning of season 10 in episode 9x17, when Sam released those souls.
I hope you liked this meta, see you in the next one!
Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper
@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @tenshilover20 @teddybeardoctor @pepevons @helevetica @isthisdestiel @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @horsez2 @qanelyytha
@imjustkipping
If you want to be tagged or removed from this list, just let me know.
If you want to check the previous season 9 Chronicles, here are the links...
Vol. XL, XVLI, XLII, XLIII, XLIV and XLV
Buenos Aires 15th January 2020 5:32 PM
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ravenalikesdabi · 3 years
Text
First fic ever
Hey, this is just a drabble I´’ve been working on, after years of reading intensively I just hope this is not bad at all, if you have any suggestions please feel free to ask me. There are no real warnings here, it may just get angst. Word count: 1081 
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You had no idea where you have been all this time.
One day you were buying new books related to your thesis and the other you were surrounded by strangers, strangers that keep you enslaved, well, that´s the only thing you can perceived under all those drugs.
Pain, many hands touching your body, your own quirk being manipulated without your consciousness. Maybe all this was your fault, you shouldn’t have caught so much attention around yourself, you made so many people mad about exposing the defects of the levels of strengths in quirks, you never mentioned yours though.
You hated your quirk so bad; it was the reason you made all of this from the beginning. It was considered high potential, but you knew it had so many defects that it wasn´t worth the try, you never wanted to become a hero, mother forced you to enter to UA and then you quit. You knew the hero commission was corrupted, your progenitor was the prove of that and still, they thought you will be a great hero just because of your damn quirk. It was so humiliating the times you failed the tests because of your lack of motivation to do so, until you had the opportunity to leave.
Now, years later being a grad student recognized by all your achievements in science and the dropout of UA, your life was comfy, you never spoke to mother again but you really didn´t care at all. Remembering all you had done was a great exercise to test your lucidness in the nightmare you were, no heroes were here to save you again.
But this was not the first time you were in this type of situation.
You didn´t liked villains, thought. You were in their world before, and yet you cannot choose between which is worse, the hero commission or villains. Probably it was just bitterness from before when they didn´t save you. You had to save yourself from the evil when you grew strong enough. And yet nothing changed, you were just a stupid puppet because of your quirk. Shadows are everything you see, memories from before blending with the actual situation around. You´re starting to lose your body, you feel somehow stronger, you weren´t able perceive yourself like that before, may be because of the drugs or the constant torture for your body to endure pain, who knows.
The shadows are actually people, but you see them like that because you´re blindfolded and what you see is the energy of themselves, which ones are stronger and it would take more to overpower them.
One day, you just snapped.
It was like if you were possessed or something. But you were. You just waited until the perfect timing.
Your quirk controlled your body, feral and merciless taking down everything you saw as a threat. You moved like a shadow, seconds, hours until you were the only one standing. Covered in blood, your eyes itching and tears spreading your cheeks, relief maybe. Then you passed out.
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The hero commission was in chaos, they just waited for too long time.
And now the scene was a massacre, and the person that caused all of that looked so fragile in Keigo’s arms, covered in bruises and blood. He thought you looked like the angel of death, sleeping beauty. What now, thought.
The shadows were just members of some kind of organization that lewd to Quirk Empowerment, they were just trying to tease you as a warning, but it got off their hands. You were going to be in trial to see if what you did was an attempt of defending yourself. I mean, obviously.
Your case caught Keigo’s attention from the beginning, he had no idea you will look like this thought. Actually he wasn´t expecting anything but anyways you impressed him, from your archives of UA when you were classified as unstable to be a hero to your great achievements at a very young age, and the other stuff you were related.
On your unconsciousness you felt warm, arms holding you with such tenderness, a comfortable perfume arousing your nose, but then, cold claws locking your hands, the warmth gone as well as the sweet perfume you were surrounded. Abandoned you tried to reach it again, but it just kept getting colder and colder.
When you open your eyes, the flashbacks of what happened suddenly make shock in your brain, your pressure gets high and some sort of machine starts ringing while you start shaking, your hands trembling tinted with the rests of your episode, you know they have blood in them and that’s why you can´t stop staring at them. Your vision turns blurry as well, from tears maybe or just the suffocating feeling that you actually killed someone this time, thanks to that devilish shit called quirk. Hands are around you in a second, before you get really anxious, they shot you with a sedative, and everything is dark again.
Keigo wants to see you, at least from the outside of the hospital to see if you´re doing okay, the commission wouldn’t let him get involved in your case and even if he really wants to talk to you, he doesn´t find a good reason to disobey. Thanks to his wings, he´s able to look up to the entire building in one way, is weird thought but he reassures himself that this would just take five minutes of his precious time. The scene that he witness is kind of funny, you´re completely tied to your bed, there are nurses watching every movement you make and your face has a very cute pout, you look mad and a little devilish but he really finds the entire situation funny.
In matter of seconds you see him, he suddenly stops at the look in your eyes, agony is what he sees and he would be lying to himself if he didn´t find you attractive, even all tied up, with your hair like a mess, and tears in your eyes. Shyly he moves his hands, in a very impulsive move that resembles to a middle school kid, combined with a little smile unusual of him. Slowly you blink twice, you´re fucking daydreaming now? Or why there´s a birdman greeting at you?
You nod once, and his smile is wide now, you look so confused that is even cuter for him now. Maybe he can pass to say hi, like fanservice he thinks.
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