#it's a little funny tho like i spent all my free time the last two days editing and then only at the last second did i go. hang on.

[whyse7vn]

BOYFRIEND -

[ot7 x reader]

GOLDEN

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

jimin: do you think i can give yeontan body dysmorphia if i show him pictures of those racer dogs??

cuz their like tall and skinny

and he’s like short and round

y/n: this one sided beef is insane

hobi: jimin wtf is wrong with you

tae: LEAVE MY DOG ALONe

he literally bit you once and all you fucking do is talk shit about him

jimin: fucking ugly nepo baby

ur lucky i don’t cook him and feed him to crabs

yoongi: get a grip

jk: guys how does birth control control birth

tae: it kills growing babies in the womb with lazers i think

hobi: what

jk: ok that makes sense

hobi: ?? no it doesn’t

jk: i wish i could control birth

jimin: abortion

yoongi: jungkook should of been

y/n: YOONGI

yoongi: sorry :3

jk: you think i could perform a abortion

jin: preform a shower

jimin: perform a diet

jin: perform a love life

jimin: perform youth

jin: perform a family that actually loves you

tae: woah

namjoon: ok

calculated all our living expenses and we need to cut down a lot

like we spend so much every month it’s not funny

what can we live without?

yoongi: jungkook probably

jin: OUR living expenses?

we do not live together!!!

tae: tf is a living expense?

y/n: is that from our silly little shared black card?

tae: WE HAVE A SHARED BLACK CARD??/!/!

yoongi: you guys still use that??

jk: i use it to rent fish

hobi: you can rent fish?

jk: yeah

i like to set them free

jimin: that feels illegal

jk: i ate one once tho

it was really sad :/

but i was really hungry

hobi: wtf

jimin: i only use that card for netflix and alcohol btw!!!!!

can’t have my accountant thinking i’m an alcoholic

namjoon: whose been using the card to pay for flights?

hybe pays for all our flights i don’t see why we’ve spent over 4 billion won on flights in the last two months when we’ve all been in korea

tae: HYBE PAYS FOR OUR FLIGHTS????

y/n: yeah are you stupid?

tae: SO WHY HAVE I BEEN GIVING JK MONEY EVERY TIME WE FLY?!

jk: is that money not for our lion we sponsored in africa?

tae: our what?

jk: lion

tae: what

jk: roar meow

🦁

that thing

jin: ofc you sponsored a lion in africa

yoongi: meow

y/n: HOLD ON 4 BILLION WON ON FLIGHTS IN 2 MONTHS???????

THATS INSANE??2£:&;&;&(

jk: we did ^_^!!!

our lion is called reggie and i get sent photos of him sometimes

i love him

jimin: i’ll shoot him

jk: TAKE THAT BACK NOW

jimin: i won’t

jk: NAMJOON TELL HIM TO TAKE IT BACK RN

namjoon: jimin take that back rn

jimin: no

namjoon: i tried!

jk: FUCK YOU

tae: you’ve been using my flight money for a lion??????????

jk: yeah!

didn’t know it was flight money tho

thought it was lion money lol

you know hybe pays for our flights right??

tae: stop speaking to me rn

jk: did i say something wrong????

namjoon: anyways

jungkook you need to stop buying fish

jk: who will set them free if i don’t 😰

hobi: SET ME FREEEEEE

namjoon: jimin chill out on the alcohol

jimin: you only live once namjoon

namjoon: it’s actually concerning how much you’ve bought THIS week

it’s for your own good

jimin: sighs

namjoon: and who tf is taking ubers everywhere we do have drivers yk??

not to mention that’s really fucking dangerous

yoongi: lmao what an idiot

y/n: lol 😅😅😅

yoongi: ????are you silly do you know how dangerous that is

ESPECIALLY for you

y/n: but they are so convenient!!!

and our drivers take soooooooo long

think about it if i didn’t take a uber yesterday i would of been late for our thing yesterday

that’s not cool is it???

yoongi: idc

i would rather you be late than dead in a ditch cuz ur uber driver was a deranged fan

y/n: booo

yoongi: next time you call one of our drivers or i’ll come and get you

ok?

y/n: ok

tae: i could come a get you lol

jk: ME TOO

I CAN

I WILL

ILL GET YOU RN

hobi: are you not in the same house?

tae: btw namjoon can’t get you lol

cuz yk he can’t drive

so he couldn’t come and get you

i’m just saying

i’m just putting it out there

someone you fuck doesn’t know how to drive

you should drop him

cuz what if you was dying and needed him asap no newjeans

he couldn’t come

cuz he can’t drive

just saying btw

namjoon: i think she gets it

shut the fuck up

jimin: LMAOOOO

namjoon: moving on whoever ordered a box of steak for 10k needs to give me the fucking card back

hobi: ok wtf

i needed that steak

jimin: who tf orders meat

y/n: that sounds gross as hell i hope it was same day delivery

hobi: i’m a chef in the making

namjoon: ur wasting money on stupid shit

hobi: ur just mad you don’t have a 10k golden stake like..

jin: namjoon ur being stingy ass hell

money is money

and we have a lot of it???

who cares what we spend it on?

jk: all unsponsored lions in africa

they care

namjoon: could you guys just be a little more responsible with our money please

just with this card at least

idc what you buy with ur own money but please for the love of god at least give me false hope in believing you are all responsible adults that can make sensible financial decisions

yoongi: thought he was an atheist

jin: that’s what im saying “for the love of god” do u even know him 😭

hobi: does he even want ur love namjoon?

jk: u wrote a lot of words there joon so i’m not gonna read it

but i hope i can still buy my fish

i’ll even get small ones if that makes you happy

y/n: would getting tae a bbl be a responsible financial decision?

tae: can i actually get the card pls

wait what????????????

y/n: or jimin do you want the bbl

jimin: I DO NOT NEED A BBL WHAT THE FUCK??

namjoon: ….

you guys are really fucking annoying yk that?

jimin: DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE JUST SAID

SHE BASICALLY CALLED ME FLAT!!!!

jk: at least it wasn’t fat!

jin: should of been 😒

jimin: OHMYGOD AM I FLAT??

DO I NEED A BBL GUYS OMGS

pls BE HONEST OMG DO I NEED A FUCKING BBL ?

tae: send pics so i can tell you

jimin: SHUT THE FUCK UP

tae: ok wtf i was only trying to help you :/

namjoon can i have the card pls pls pls pls

namjoon: no

y/n: hey ur not flat!!!!!

jimin: SO WHY WOULD YOU SAY I NEED A BBL????

y/n: i asked if you wanted one

i didn’t say that you needed one

jimin: do you think i’m flat

y/n: no!!!!!

jimin: ohmygod i’m gonna kms she thinks i’m flat

yoongi: can you read

jk: y/n can you come home i’m really sad namjoon just cancelled my fish rental for next tuesday

y/n: namjoon give him back his fish rental

namjoon: no

jk: y/n come HOME

y/n: can’t!

jaehyun says hi btw

jk: TELL HIM TO KILLHIMSELF /£:£;7:7,

hobi: so this relationship is for real???

namjoon: can we not

jimin: look at him getting defensive 💀

namjoon: how was that defensive??

i just don’t want us to all argue again

jimin: you can just say ur jealous joon

namjoon: shut up

tae: i’m jealous

hobi: we don’t care

jin: so like can jaehyun drive?

y/n: he can do a lot of things >\\\<

yoongi: don’t care

jimin: LMAOOOOO

wow this is really the best thing to happen to us

y/n: us???

he’s MY boyfriend

tae: my chest just caved in

jimin: sorry yeah he’s your BOYFRIEND

yoongi: we fucking get it omg

moving on

hobi: HEHEHEHEHEHEHE

yoongi: tf you giggling for

jk: HEY UR NOT ALLOWED TO GIGGLE

UR RULES HOBI 😡

hobi: today is cheat day

i have to giggle

jk: can i giggle?

hobi: y/n has a boyfriend

jk: SHUT UPSSIJ SHUTUOPSOOOO SDKKDDJDJDJDJDMMEJDJDJEJDJJSJEIDJDJSJDJDJDJDJDJDJDJJDDJJCKXJDJKDKX

namjoon: ok can we solve this card issue

tae: can i have the card pls i need to buy something to stop my heartbeat for a while

namjoon: shut up

hobi: y/n does this mean ur friends with nct now

can i like join them??

pls ask

y/n: ok

jin: omg should we have have a party??

nct x bts

yoongi: no

y/n: can you guys stop trying to cause arguments rn

jin: idk what she’s taking about

hobi: right like??

jimin: think it has something to do with her BOYFRIEND but idk

y/n: …..

jin: so what are you and your BOYFRIEND doing today???

y/n: STOP LAMSOSO

yoongi: so it’s funny now?

y/n: are you fr?

yoongi: i’m just saying lmao

namjoon: ok lets not do this again guys!!

jk: i wish i could do life again

namjoon: ok!

so whose been paying for these flights?

hobi: could be y/n and her BOYFRIEND

y/n: hoseok

hobi: ok sorry last one i’m sorry i’m sorry

jk: do you think reggie has had to deal with heart break like this???

jimin: here he goes 🙄

hobi: bet you all my money he will be drunk in the next hour

jin: hour???

i say the next 5 minutes

namjoon: guys the card??

jimin: namjoon we don’t care??

namjoon: i will punch you in the fucking face

jimin: WOAH??????????

y/n: joon omg

hobi: LMAOSODODJFJ

yoongi: real

jin: i’ll record !!!

tae: my gf said that to me once…

hobi: ??

tae: SIGHS

y/n: i’ll record?

tae: no wtf

the punch you in the face part

y/n: hey i said that

tae: yeah 😞…. yeah you did 😞

jimin: GUYS THERE IS A FUCKING FROG IN MY REFRIGERATOR

IM NOT JOKING

WHY IS THERE A FROG IN THERE

OHMUGOF

GUYS HELP ME

OSHDJCKDJCJD

PLS OHMUGSICODODKF

HELDPDOFKDKFN

JSNDNDND

7:& nfkcjemc

PLS

WHSUSHD WHAT THE FUCKCCKDN

ITS JUMPING IN MY FUCKINH FRIFGE EW EWEW GUYS WHAT THE HELL

jin: always knew he was dirty

hobi: free frog legs

y/n: don’t die

tae: namjoon can i have the black card

yoongi: give up

jimin: THERE IS TWO OF THEM

TWO FUCKMG FROGS HELSODKNDNDNC

HSNDELP HELP

PLS OM BEGHINF

HELP ME

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NmJSODKFNDNCJDJDJJCKC

EW

HELP ME

namjoon: help urself

jk: aw man :/

i feel so sorry for them

birth control ❤️

namjoon: what are you talking about

jk: namjoon i booked a fight to belgium

namjoon: im sorry?

jk: i forgive you

don’t be sorry

chin up king

hobi: tf he yapping about

jk: my fish are going to belgium

yoongi: what

jin: the rented ones?

tae: let’s kill jaehyun

y/n: the 4 billion in 2 months was jungkook?

jk: my fish are ₩20,000 per bucket

not 4 billion the heck

yoongi: wow i’m losing my mind being in this gc

hobi: we can replace you with woozi lol

yoongi: say something like that again and i will break ur neck

hobi: ok WOAH

guys do you see how aggressive he is like???

that’s not right at all

jimin: THE FROGSGUYS OLS OHMUGSICODKDKNDDNDNDN

HELDPDOFKDKDND ENDNCNFMNCNXJDNC

namjoon: jungkook have you been using the card to pay for flights

jk: hybe pays for our fights

namjoon: ok but why did you say you booked a flight to Belgium then???

hobi: its like talking to a 7yr old

jk: no

namjoon: no?

jin: wow he’s making me want to kms

hobi: the soju has taken over!

jk: birth control!

yoongi: shut the fuck up

jk: aw man

who wants fish????

yoongi left “GOLDEN”

namjoon left “GOLDEN”

jin left “GOLDEN”

tae: i’m sorry man

send me those card details later tho!

tae left “GOLDEN”

jimin: WHERE ARE YOU FUCKINGGOFING MY FUCKING FRIDGE HAS FOGS IN IT COME BACK NOW

hobi left “GOLDEN”

y/n left “GOLDEN”

jk: good talk team

--

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @yojaschill @k4ngelz @jmnscutie

[insertsomthinawesome]

Sorry if this doesn’t make sense but how do you… art? Like from looking at your art, there’s just so many different fandoms and it’s all fantastic!! How do you not stick to one or feel like you *have* to stick to one? Sorry

Aw Friend! No need to apologize! :D You asked your question plenty politely! That's a really interesting question actually, and I'm fascinated to be asked it! Because I actually do know the kinda thing you're talking about! or at least I have experiences that feel like they line up with what you're asking. A lot of its... growing up? I guess? And not in the sense of like. becoming an adult. but the non-stop process of growing and learning more about life. When I was younger, an actual child, I just Did it. I drew whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I didn't question hoping to a new interest or drawing different fandoms. I just did it. But the older you get the more complicated a lot of things get right? 😔 That was true for me.

I actually spent several years terrified, of moving on. Of leaving old fandoms behind. There was one fandom I actually forced myself not to leave for like... 2 years? Because I was afraid of all the projects I wouldn't complete, all the stories I wouldn't tell, all the art i wouldn't make. But honestly that was a horrible decision? It burnt me out of the specific fandom SO BADLY. Its only been around this last year that I've been able to enjoy things around it again without an overhanging shadow of stress.

I was still scared to fandom hop after that incident tho. Despite having gotten burned by caving to my own fears. It wasn't until I got into Trigun that I actually started to get less scared. A friend I met in that fandom, someone who was older than me, told me that... things have a way of coming back around. If you know the song "Everything Stays" From Adventure time? She said it was like that song. You will inevitably get older. But these things won't be gone. And you can always come back to them :) That clicked in my brain... and it took a bit longer, a bit more time of accepting that fact for me to find peace... but honestly? I kinda have now. At least for this moment in time. I wouldn't be surprised if the fear comes back around again, fear is funny and insidious like that. But I have the tools to beat it now :) The other two things I would mention are these: For starters: this might be obvious? But I'm a hobbyist artist. I don't make money off of my art, I don't sell it, I don't need numbers or clout in order to pay my bills. I'm completely free to do my own thing! Ain't nothing wrong with making a living off of your artwork and if that's the path that you want to walk GO FOR IT. But that path does have its own challenges. Because I don't walk that path, I am free to make whatever I want, without worrying about how it might reflect on my finances. The other thing is...

PERFECTIONISM...

THIS, NASTY LITTLE VILE COCKROACH, WILL RUIN YOUR ART LIFE SO BADLY ITS INSANE. It will ruin your NORMAL life super fast too 😔 it is an insidious little shoulder devil telling you, that you will be happier if you just do it the "perfect" way. IT IS SO SO SO SO SO SO WRONG. That is the key to the door of endless procrastination and broken dreams. SFLJSLF to get less metaphorical about it though: If you're always waiting for the perfect moment to make art for a fandom, to leave a fandom, to join a fandom (in this case i just mean "Get into the thing that interests you" when I say "Fandom") or create literally anything, you will be waiting forever. I know because i have been :') And its made it very hard to draw both in my past, and right now this very day.

Truthfully i'm still working on that one??? I've had some epiphanies recently that have helped a lot with my perfectionism... but I haven't tried drawing since having them? (drowning in the new Honkai Star Rail Patch WHEEZE) So uh. Not sure If I'm over that hill yet xD But yeah, if that's one piece of advice i could give you to take seriously, its don't chase perfection, in ANYTHING. Especially art. It will never be enough for you. And if you're doing it for other people, it will never be enough for them. Art is wonderful and messy, and human. And that is okay.

Its taken me a lot of soul diving and thinking and a lot of help from outside influence and kind people for me to figure this stuff out too. So don't feel bad to ask for help kay? We all need help. A lot xD I'm still not like, the king this stuff either. There are a lot of smaller, more niche, fandoms, I want to draw for, but still haven't, because of my own anxiety and embarrassment. There are fandoms I haven't drawn for because I don't feel like i have the adequate amount of information to be, ""allowed"" too (which is totally a fake standard btw, there is no barrier to entry for when you're "allowed" to draw something). I'm working on these problems every day.

Oh actually one last note: People can influence how hard it is for you to draw for a bunch of fandoms too. If you know you'll get made fun of for drawing something, its hard to draw. If you know you'll get praised for drawing something, sometimes that makes it easier to draw. Both of those things can mess you up BAD. Constantly drawing for other people (when its not a deliberate gift) can make you feel really upset and angry, and dissonant with your artwork.

But it can be equally as hard to realize nobody will share your enthusiasm if you don't draw what they like. That's not a judgement against anybody's friendships, we all got our own interests, and nobody can be 100% Invested in everything their friends enjoy. But It can make it a bit more emotionally challenging sometimes. And it can be hard to like?? Emotionally deal with that? in a way it makes art that you know will perform well, either with your friend group or online, like... "Candy". Its tastes good, but it doesn't give you long term energy (ie there's nothing wrong with it, but its not sustainable as your only form of sustenance) Meanwhile making art that is purely self indulgent is like eating a full and healthy meal. It gives you that long term energy of personal satisfaction, and your enjoyment and happiness also doesn't inherently hinge on whether or not other people appreciate it like you do. Obviously there's no issue if what you genuinely want to draw would also do well online/with your friends!

ANYWAYS, yeah, I'm still maturing and learning and growing with a lot of my opinions and perspectives and emotions on this stuff? Its definitely easier said than done, and while from the outside it looks effortless... I understand why you'd be struggling anon. I hope you can figure it out for yourself too! Best of luck :D also i could go on and on and on about this topic for years because alsjdfaksjdflJSDJGSD ooohhhhhhh boy I have learned and witnessed and thought many a thunk.

[themetalvirus]

prime spoilers

its so funny that shadow kept screaming SONIC JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO ME FOR A SECOND into sonic's face and he just KEPT. IGNORING HIM. DUDE LISTEN TO SHADOW HES A FUCKING GHOST STUCK IN THE VOID YOU SHOULD PROBABLY HELP HIM. JESUS CHRIST. i'd punch sonic too after that

i love rusty rose. i love her. i LOVE her. i hope she gets her free will back, she is clearly capable of good (and was turned good in that one episode). get all of the programming OUT of her and just let her make her own decisions, i don't even care if she returns to eggman anyway because it's all she's known for so long, i just need to see her with free will. please. someone help this poor girl

speaking of people who need help, nine :( NINE. nine. NINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hes SO!!!! he needs to experience the magic of friendship and shoot his first friendship rainbow beam so bad. hes so lonely and USED to being lonely that he chose a barren wasteland to call home. that's no way to live, man.

also captain knuckles had a reeeeally concerning turn in that last episode, his Gemstone Guarding Instincts kicked in and he went a little nuts. i want more of that tbh. more nutso knuckles

i was expecting a lot more from prime but this is very very clearly not the end, it's clearly not even the whole of season 1 and is being split up into different release chunks for netflix (like glitch techs is 1 season but was released in two seperate chunks as "seasons 1 and 2"). i personally hoped to see more worlds, but i'm also glad what we DID see was fleshed out. i was expecting a more episodic format in terms of visiting the worlds so i'm happy we get to spend actual time in each of them and get to know the characters and their problems

i'm wondering if sonic erased his original friends out of existence when he shattered the paradox prism (like how green hill doesnt exist anymore) or if they also landed in different worlds. or the void. or something else entirely

speaking of green hill, isn't it super weird that they just... decided all of sonic's world is green hill. i guess it's for budgetary reasons? and to control the scope? but it's super fucking weird right, like, i'm not the only one that thinks that's weird? there are. other places in sonic's world. sonic doesn't live ANYWHERE he just ends up in green hill a lot. maybe it's also for a point of comparison, like how the loop-de-loop is always in the same place? just to have more solid landmarks to see what's different. i just wish they did that with like. multiple areas of the world. instead of multiple landmarks of Just Green Hill

anyway waiting for the next part of this show to drop is gonna be torture. i have some Gripes and Grumbles (WHERE IS BLAZE IN THE PIRATE DIMENSION? WHERE IS SHE!) but nothing is ever perfect and also i love having stuff to gripe and grumble about. rusty rose is my new best friend btw. (also the knuxouge enjoyers are eating well, congratulations to those who that applies to)

theres gonna be so much fanfic about these goddamn places i can tell. especially the fucked up eggman won world. theres so much potential there. i'm hoping (like another person said) that rusty rose's backstory is that she got kidnapped, sonic wasn't there, and she got turned into a fucked up robot thing. because wouldn't that be fucked up. that would fuck this version of sonic up too, he'd feel so upset and guilty that he couldn't help her (and then be determined to help her NOW even if shes evil). i wish they spent more time on rusty and the pirate amy recognizing each other and being freaked out tho. thats also a lot of potential

i also want to see sonic find another version of himself. i don't think that'll happen? because like, he doesn't exist in any of these worlds because he's the god of these gajillion universes. but also i want him to find a fucked up version of himself and go dear god that could have been me. itd be neat i think

in any case i am kissing these writers on the mouth for rusty rose and nine. i am a sonic fan who craves being spoonfed more funny little guys so i can point and go HEY I KNOW THAT GUY but i'm also just really glad that big is part of the crew. hes so good :)

i have more thoughts but also i am eepy and i dont feel like typing anymore. sonic prime flawed and for babies but also good. i'm glad we finally got a proper action cartoon this time, it's wicked cool. i love rusty rose did i mention that yet. i love rusty rose

[neowinestainedress]

rebs i missed you soo much too but i can’t never find the time to come on this app again cause after i finished my internship they (kinda) hired me so i’m working + classes and doing my thesis and i want to KILL MYSLEF i’m always so tired nowadays and sleeping EVERYWHERE

but god where do i start… first of all i don’t remember if i said this already but CONGRATULATIONS ON GRADUATING I’M SO PROUD OF YOU REBS YOU ARE AMAZING!!! how is life treating you? what are you up to lately?

about the hits different review that i told you about the last time i sent you an ask i think? i still haven’t finished it but i will i SWEAR i was half through it if i remember correctly… i also want and NEED to read your new stories even tho i spoiled myself the other day and saw that mc ends up with jaemin and not haechan 😞 but it’s okay!!! i love jaemin

and now about the things i wanted to tell you!!

1. i saw nct dream in concert and i even got BARRICADE and it was such an amazing experience no one pushed me or anything so i really enjoyed it + i finally met two of my longtime ibf 🥹 but you WON’T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED AT THE CONCERT!!!!

I FINALLY SAW HAECHAN LIVE LIKE HE WAS THE ONLY NEO (except wayv ofc) that i was yet to meet and he was sosososo pretty i wanted to cry i couldn’t believe i was finally meeting the love of my life he was GLOWING (and not because of his sweat or smt like that) even tho he was a little sick i think? cause he wasn’t as playful as usual but i completely understand since he must have been so tired. we made eye contact so many times and i wanted to DIE RIGHT THERE he’s so mesmerizing and sexy and charismatic PLEASE HAECHAN JUST ONE (1) CHANCE like i could talk about him ALL DAY EVERYDAY

it was so funny to me the fact that haechan was the first one to come out when the concert started so he appeared and i SCREAMED SO MUCH i almost threw up within then first 3 minutes 😭😭😭 and the first time he went to dance in front of me and we made eye contact i literally froze ajshskdjsod like no thoughts head empty

mark my bestie (it was the second time in less than a year that i saw him<3) he’s just TOO good and i have THE PERFECT FANCAM of him dancing RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME

renjun is SO TINY and pretty like 🤏🏼 i wanted to hug him

jeno is GORGEOUS LIKE HELLLOO?? WHY ARE YOU SHOWING YOUR FACE FOR FREE FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE??

JAEMIN IS SO BIG HIS TITTIES ARE ENORMOUS and has the MOST big and beautiful smile i’ve ever seen he was so sweet the whole time

haechan is ….. god i could write a whole essay about him he’s just too pretty i spent 99% of the concert only watching him

chenle is so pretty too and so pale (just like jeno) and he did the most amazing adlibs EVER he was literally a cat so playful and cute

jisung………. he’s CRAZY. tiniest waist i’ve ever seen like HELLO WHO ARE YOU??? so sweet too my cutie

the concert was so much fun and they are amazing performers i screamed soooo much i wish i could watch them live everyday and im happy that they didn’t break their promise of coming back soon and with haechan too (for the first time this was his fourth attempt😭) the trauma from november is now gone (lies i won’t ever recover from that time)

2. and here comes the most exciting part and i’m literally exposing my identity rn but…………………………. haechan PICKED UP MY GIFT LIKE HE ACTUALLY TOOK IT WITH HIS OWN TWO HANDS 😭😭😭😭😭😭 and also it was the only gift he actually picked up from the ground since the other two were given to him by mark and jeno (you can search the candy performance in chile and you will see it 😭😭😭😭 kinda sad he didn’t open it since inside the bag was a teddy bear baseball cap + hanging from the zipper a shinchan as michael jackson keychain that took me FOREVER to find)

3. i’m on my way to see aespa right now i’m so excited<3!!!

4. i have a boyfriend… well not really i mean he wants to date me but i don’t feel like i love him enough and i even broke off with him last year but he just really loves me? even though i explained to him how i feel… the bad thing is that i was trying to “date” him secretly but i posted a pic of haechan on my ig that said “love of my life” so everyone started asking me who he was and shit so i had to tell them about my situansionahip because i couldn’t expose myself as a kpoppie 😭😭😭😭😭

and i think that is all about my life lately now tell me about yours rebs 🫂

I get you when I was writing my thesis I was on the brink of suicide too so I hope everything goes well and you can find time to rest!

THANK YOU! I’m struggling to find a job BUT this weekend I have the inauguration of the exhibition of my photos so I hope it brings something good. I’m having some health problems (funny thing, they’re not given by what I have but by the treatment I’m getting to calm down the illness) but overall I’m good.

Yes you did! Omg how much are you writing skdjfmk did it have a bigger impact than the sour series? I’m sorry for the spoilers, I try to wait to reblog but if I don’t answer after a while I just forget about it 💀I’m sure you will love Jaemin in the story!

1. I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU! Finally a non-traumatic experience😭you truly lived your y/n moment omg and he is! I saw him years ago and I still have him impressed in my mind and I wasn’t that close HOW did you NOT pass out?  

👀 Drop the Mark fancam now 👀

You talking about Mark, Jeno, Renjun, Chenle: 🥰💞 the lomls, prettiest boys ever, smoll 🥰💞 You talking about Jaemin and Jisung: !!!BOOBS!!! WAIST!!!

I want to see them live so badly, I hope they can come to Europe (italy because i don't have money to spend on hotels and flights) 😭

no but seriously after everything that happened last time I’m so happy to know this time it was an amazing experience, you deserve it!

2. HE GOT YOUR GIFT OMG OSJDOFJOD you really are the chosen one please share a bit of your luck (no okay I’m convinced that this was destiny/god/universe/whatever you want to call it, paying you back for the trauma of November) is this the video? also how are you alive pt2? no because it must be so thrilling to know he has something you gave him 😭

3. have fun at aespa’s concert! Say hi to my girlfriend Ningning 😔

4. Warn him that if he dares to hurt you I will have to intervene (we’re not doing a traitor pt2) the Haechan thing took me out I’m sorry, it’s so funny 😭😭 but seriously do what feels right for you and don’t feel pressured just because he likes you a lot

About me there’s not much to say. Like I said I’m trying to find a job but I chose the worst field possible so it’s been hard as hell, I thought I found something but then she changed her mind after I did the trial (I was good, I was really good and she was impressed but for some reason she went from ‘being overloaded with work’ to ‘mhh you know how it is, you never know how much work you have, I can’t hire you’ lmao) and now I keep looking for something. But I’m quite fine when I don’t think too much about my future and feel like a failure lol

[miraculouscontent]

*rubs hands together*

The first thing to talk about with this episode is the pacing, and I think this might contribute to why people think it’s the best/least bad of Season 4 (personally, I’d rather watch ��Furious Fu” but that’s just me; also, this isn’t the only contributing factor as to why I think people might feel this way, but I’ll get there later).

The episode has a very serious pacing issue, particularly with its more intense scenes. There’s only one minute of time dedicated to Ladybug landing on her bed, de-transforming, and her snapping at her friends plus them leaving. More time was spent on Chat Noir and Ladybug in the movie theater and Ladybug storming out.

I particularly remember watching the episode and getting eighteen minutes in, at which point I had the realization of, “It feels like nothing’s happened?”

This episode is supposed to be a big gut punch, but the season has been going by at the speed of sound, like they’re trying desperately to play all their cards at once (Lukanette break-up, Adrimi break-up, then Alya is told Marinette’s secret identity). Instead of letting things build and play out for a while in the interest of suspense, the show just throws whatever will get a big reaction out of the fandom (whether positive or negative) and it doesn’t care how shoddily put together everything is. The first two episodes feel like hastily put together drafts, and while this one is technically more put together, it still feels like a draft.

Let’s just start with Chat Noir, who feels completely out of place in the episode. Not only does he imply that he intentionally calls Ladybug “Bugaboo” (which she has told him to stop doing) in order to get a reaction out of her, but when Ladybug insists that she doesn’t want to talk, he tricks her into thinking that he has a good location to do so (and my heart breaks a little at how readily she trusts him) only to then take her to a romantic movie, then shush her when she calls him out for it because she “said she didn’t want to talk.”

Gee, and people wonder why she didn’t tell him her secret (even outside of “Chat Blanc” existing)?

And... look, I know it’s a joke, but I do not find it funny. The “joke” is basically that Chat Noir is taking advantage of the situation to flirt with Ladybug, and though I find it at least mildly cathartic that Ladybug is unaffected by all the people staring at them while Chat Noir is embarrassed, this episode is coming right after the one where Kagami broke up with Adrien, and here Chat Noir is getting his flirt game on. I already talked about all my problems with “Lies” so I won’t do it again, but I’ll just say that it’s not a mystery why Ladybug doesn’t want to talk to him and would rather avoid her problems.

(Not to mention that Ladybug knows that Chat Noir likes her, so talking about her romantic problems with him is awkward to say the least and would come off as insensitive.)

Honestly, at this point I feel like they must be building to something with Chat, like Ladybug finally going off of him with no mercy and that forces him to give up/fall out of love for her because reverse love square, but if that’s what they intend to go for, then that means Marinette is going to fall for this guy who’s repeatedly disrespected her feelings for multiple seasons, almost abandoned her and let Paris drown because she wouldn’t tell him a secret that wasn’t hers to tell, and just generally all the other things he did????

Ugh, I don’t wanna think about it. Let’s just move on.

Talking about Ladybug and her rant next, it basically summarizes the whole show in a nutshell, but simultaneously casts a shadow of sorts over “Truth” for people who maybe missed the episode entirely (which is also sort of the show in a nutshell). I mean, Ladybug confirming to the audience that she was genuinely in love and happy with Luka (you can’t watch how depressed she was over the break-up and not think that) was great, but Ladybug’s dialog implies that Luka “hated secrets” and that’s why they broke up, when Luka was more just... hurt that she couldn’t be honest with him, and he didn’t actively hate secrets. Marinette broke up with him because she felt like she had to; because she had to keep ditching and lie to him.

In addition, what she says also hints to the audience that they’ve both held and kissed each other, which not only indicates cowardice on the part of the staff (”yeah this happened but--um--off-screen; we’d still like credit tho plz”), but may perhaps go back to the theory I had about how Adrimi and Lukanette were supposed to last longer in Season 4 but their arcs got cut (based on the Adrimi kiss having supposed to have gone off). This could mean that Ladybug’s statement was originally accurate to canon but the scenes got cut and the scriptwriters just awkwardly left it in, which is made more awkward by the cinema scene in “Truth” that felt like Luka and Marinette were kissing for the first time (again, alluding to the whole, “this entire season has been a draft” thing).

Also, if you think about what that actually means - that Luka and Marinette did have successful dates and kisses but they were off-screen - then all it adds up to is that showing Marinette happy and comfortable was something that the series didn’t deem as “interesting/fun enough” to show, because Marinette being happy isn’t something they want to see; only watching her be miserable, which is exactly what Ladybug says, along with how everything was “almost too simple, too easy,” because Marinette isn’t allowed to have nice things without being jammed through the wringer first.

And... sure, let’s say that Chat Noir thought the movie was genuinely a good idea; let’s assume that it could be a joke, him wanting to flirt, and him believing that it’d make her feel better somehow.

If that’s the case, then where’s the apology when it fails miserably? Ladybug goes from her semi-anxious state at the start of the episode (a little scatterbrained but ultimately just looking for a distraction), to outright enraged by the movie, and then to this upon leaving the cinema.

She just got her heart broken from being forced to break up with a boy she genuinely wanted to be with and there’s not a single, “Okay, maybe coming here was a bad idea, I’m sorry,” (which could’ve been seen as another joke with the audience like “lol no duh Chat Noir” so there’s no excuse not to have it) or, “My bad, that was insensitive of me. I really thought this would’ve helped but I wasn’t thinking about what you would’ve wanted.”

No. The only people Chat apologizes to are the other people at the theater because he’s embarrassed by Ladybug’s reactions, yet he himself feels no remorse for taking her there and has the gall to go on now about how he’s “there for her if she wants to talk.”

Again, it’s no wonder Ladybug doesn’t want to open up to him.

And I’m sorry, I just don’t buy that Marinette suddenly has all this free time. It’s one thing for her to have a little more time now that she’s broken up with her boyfriend (likely avoiding spending time with him altogether now), but “Truth” went out of its way to talk about all of the emergencies she had to deal with and how she doesn’t have any spare time. which is causing her to become forgetful and lose track of certain events (patrols with Chat, dates with Luka, etcetera), yet Marinette spends most of “Gang of Secrets” simply sulking on her bed. It’s so jarring to go from “Truth” where she was doing “too much” (which I called them out on for not describing what the “too much” she was doing was) and now “Gang of Secrets” where she’s not doing anything.

It’s almost like they invented that plot point to break Lukanette up and it served no purpose outside of it.

Furthermore, the scenes of her finally talking to Tikki and then deciding to live as Ladybug does nothing outside of making the plot more predictable, the latter because of the “Alya almost sees Ladybug” moment (an obvious indicator that Marinette is losing control and is struggling to maintain her secret identity due to her emotionally breaking down) and the former because of Tikki herself and what she doesn’t say.

Because, really, think about what actually goes on in the scene. Marinette (eyes rimmed red and filled with unshed tears, as she is for a good chunk of the episode) is venting to Tikki about - yes - her love life, but also that she has to lie to everyone in order to keep her identity a secret. The fact that Tikki focuses solely on the note of Marinette’s love life and not say a word about the identity/lying issue or even consider telling Marinette, “hey, this is clearly too much for you, you should tell someone, I think the benefits outweigh the risks right now,” really proves that the episode tried to avoid the topic altogether to try and make the ending more shocking (which ironically made it more predictable).

So yeah, not only does Tikki’s dialog with Marinette provide nothing except for a line about how she can’t help Marinette with love issues due to kwami not falling in love (alright, I guess aros can’t give good love advice then or have any input whatsoever), but Marinette’s line about lying to everyone being why she can’t pursue Adrien nor Luka is repeated in the very last scene of the episode. The only reason that scene and the scene after exist is because the writers needed Marinette to be emotionally devastated enough to leave for her balcony as Ladybug for the almost-reveal to Alya and so Rose would get close enough to the dollhouse to have an almost-reveal with the Miracle Box, making the scene feel further contrived because the emotional punch of Marinette wanting to live as Ladybug lasts for barely any time at all.

And it could’ve served a purpose, like if Ladybug had genuinely left and Alya finds her goggles and towel, recognizing them from a news story about how Ladybug had gone to the swimming pool after losing her temper at the cinema, which could’ve led to Shadow Moth making the girls believe that Ladybug was no longer heroic and had kidnapped Marinette, or... heck, Ladybug coming back inside would’ve been so much less jarring if she came back because she heard the girls’ voices talking about the dollhouse and had to hurry (but of course, then they’d have to point out the ridiculousness of Ladybug not hearing Alya calling her and the girls not hearing Ladybug literally shouting for Shadow Moth to come fight her, even though the kwami heard the girls calling for Marinette from the balcony).

But instead, the entire scene feels off and unnatural, forcing every part of it in order to get to where Marinette has to snap at the girls to make them leave.

(Oh, by the way, just a little detail to add to the annoyance: they bothered putting Tom and Sabine in the episode when the girls are leaving, clearly saddened by something that happened, and neither parent even bothers to go and check on Marinette to see if she’s upset or just to see what might’ve happened. They’re such a “blink-and-you’ll-miss it” moment in the episode and it’s not like I’m surprised because they’ve done this multiple times by now but really?)

As for the girls themselves... oof, where do I even begin?

Alright, first off is the annoyance that they assume Marinette’s problems relate only to lovesickness. Marinette has been an anxiety-prone mess throughout the entire series, and suddenly now the girls care about Marinette’s love problems on an emotional level rather than “we’ll meddle sometimes unless we don’t feel like it and be wholly inconsistent on how much we push for it.”? It’s not that I don’t see how they came to the conclusion (hearing that Luka and Marinette broke up and now seeing Marinette is depressed, it checks out), but considering they bothered noting that Marinette hadn’t told them anything, one would think they’d come to the conclusion of, “okay, we haven’t talked to her, we have no idea of what’s going on, maybe we don’t know her as well as we thought then and shouldn’t make guesses.”

Secondly is the “eternal friendship bracelet,” which comes off as a copy of the “Secrets” game from “Syren” extremely manipulative. Mylene goes on to explain that one is supposed to give a secret to the pearl “mentally,” yet when the girls actually show up to see Marinette, they expect to be told the secret directly. I’ve already talked at length about peer pressure and the mental stress Marinette goes through when they mock her and/or meddle for her, but this idea of, “well we all used this friendship bracelet after we mutually agreed to it so now it’s your turn because we said so!” just comes off really bad. I know the episode is going for this idea that their hearts are in the right place, but they’re really not. It feels like they’re the ones in denial and are trying to compensate by forcing Marinette to prove that they’re friends, unable to handle the idea that they might not be as close to her as they thought.

Thirdly, the show acts as if the girl squad are her only friends when we know that’s not true because we’ve seen episodes like “Befana” (the guys in the class), “Reverser” (Marc), “Ikari Gozen” (Kagami), and “Silencer” (Ivan) that all established Marinette having more friends than just them, but for the sake of “drama” and the depressing line of, “at least I don’t have any more friends to lie to,” the episode just pretends like Marinette’s friends are limited to Luka (who she had to break up with) and the girl squad (who she forced to leave and refuse the friendship of).

Fourthly is the actual set-up and the sheer grossness of it all. The girls call Marinette and leave a message about how they much they love her and how she can talk to them “where and when” she wants, and then - immediately afterwards - decide that they’re going to go straight to Marinette’s house completely unannounced, go into her room completely unannounced (not even knocking, by the way), and when Marinette begs them to leave, Alya basically tells her that she’s overreacting. When Marinette demands that they leave, Alya refuses and makes demands right back that they won’t leave until she tells them what’s wrong.

So much for “where and when” she wanted, right? It’s already one thing for the girls to invade Marinette’s privacy and demand/guilt-trip answers out of her, but it’s another thing to give the illusion of respecting her feelings and personal space only to actively plan to go back on it. I can’t tell if it’s a bad draft that they didn’t catch in quality check (you know, the quality check that they definitely don’t have) or just an intentional way to make them seem more sympathetic so Marinette looks worse for driving them out, but either way, it’s awful and I hate it. I would’ve rather had them be all in on invading Marinette’s privacy and learn a lesson in the end than outright contradict themselves.

There are also little nitpicks I could make (like Juleka’s constant mumbling despite Luka’s crush on Marinette playing a role in the episode, Horrificator getting sidelined due to being mute, and the girls’ akumatization ultimately being for spectacle and nothing else, serving no purpose to the plot and being furthered by the fact that Timebreaker goes after Marinette despite it being a bad idea and Reflekta’s power clearly not lining up with any sort of plan), but the real issue issue here comes down to the fact that these are Marinette’s so-called “friends” and the episode refuses to address their actual issues.

Alix, who is known for making rude comments at Marinette (”Gigantitan,” “Chat Blanc,” “Miraculous New York”) and then gives mixed messages by going along with meddling anyway.

Mylene, who is the closest thing to a background character in the girl squad but nevertheless finds her way into being definite voice against Marinette in “Chameleon.”

Juleka, who blamed Marinette for things she didn’t do in “Reflekdoll” and got huffy with her until Marinette apologized for said things.

Rose, who outright screamed at Marinette in “Chat Blanc” over a freaking stuffed animal, which pressured Marinette enough that she snuck into Adrien’s room to deliver her gift which nearly led to the end of the world.

And, of course, Alya; freaking Alya. I don’t even have to go into every single thing she’s ever done because I have a history of giving her absolutely no mercy.

...But let’s go through some anyway because I want to.

“Copycat” - Alya gives Marinette a script and tells her to memorize it, then immediately pushes the “call” button when Marinette hesitates after Marinette had just told Alya that she’s awful at improv.

“Darkblade” - Alya takes a jab at Marinette when Marinette says that she’s too busy to be class representative, implying that Alya thinks that Marinette does absolutely nothing with her time.

“Gamer” - Alya is busy recording the gaming competition when she and Marinette were supposed to be researching for a term paper. Alya then scolds Marinette for wanting to use the competition to get close to Adrien only to do a 180 and put up a fight about it when Marinette decides to quit.

“Animan” and how “The Puppeteer 2″ follows up on it - oh, I’m not going to touch that particular point right now, but keep those in the back of your mind, because I am going to absolutely go off later

“Simon Says” - Similarly to Marinette’s parents, Alya gives zero damns about whatever might be going on in Marinette’s life that's causing her to miss classes.

"Despair Bear” - Alya laughs at Marinette being forced to kiss Chloe’s cheek and then outright compares Marinette to Chloe after knocking Chloe multiple times during the episode (sure, just compare your “best friend” to her multi-year bully, how "hilarious” of you).

“Gigantitan” - Alya has no qualms about mocking Marinette’s over her failures, even if it embarrasses her and she’s been through enough already.

“Frozer” - Alya tries to find ways for Marinette to prevent herself from third-wheeling for Adrien, but when Marinette tries to show character growth by wanting to go, Alya gets into a shouting match with the other girls over how Marinette has “liked Adrien forever and isn’t going to give up now”.

“Catalyst” - Alya claims that Marinette is only salty over Lila out of jealousy when “Frozer” exists and literally is the prime evidence of Adrien liking another girl and Marinette telling Alya outright and very genuinely that she’s not jealous.

“Chameleon” - Alya doesn’t care about her best friend sitting in the back by herself while Alya herself get to sit next to her boyfriend and everyone else in general gets to sit where they want (Alya even acting confused at the mere suggestion that she’d tried to engineer things to let Marinette sit next to Adrien), then not only believes Lila over Marinette but contradicts herself twice (asking Marinette for proof when she has none herself, then claiming that she wouldn’t let her best friend sit by herself).

“Christmaster” - Alya leaves Marinette to babysit so she and Nino can go out on a date.

“Desperada” - Alya suddenly is for Lukanette for literally one episode and doesn’t know how/doesn’t even try to cover for Marinette’s Adrien blindness despite mocking her for multiple seasons over it.

“Reflekdoll” - Alya invites Adrien to something that’s crucial for Marinette to focus on after Marinette has already told her not to and continues meddling to the point where it gets Juleka akumatized (she also doesn’t get punished for it and the blame gets thrown onto Marinette).

“The Puppeteer 2″ - Alya pushes her luck with Nathalie to try and get Marinette to come with her, Nino, Adrien, and Manon to the museum, then traps Marinette in a room with Adrien to force her to spent alone time with him, even abandoning and forgetting about the child that she offered to watch for Marinette so she and her boyfriend can go off alone.

“Miraculous New York” - Alya is told directly by Marinette that she needs help seeing Adrien as a friend, which leads Alya to do the exact opposite throughout the entire special, at one point shouting at Marinette and pressuring her to chase after a car, in the rain, while there’s a supervillain rampaging through Paris, and all of this right after the scheme that Alya had set up caused both Marinette and Adrien to go missing.

And just saying, as Marinette’s supposed “best friend,” Alya sure doesn’t know how to handle her. It was acceptable back in “The Bubbler” when she asked Marinette about signing the gift too late and the same goes for “Dark Cupid,” but by the time we get to late Season 2/3 and Alya refuses to learn Marinette’s weak spots (unless it’s to mock her) and adjust accordingly (like if she’d already made sure the gift was signed in “Chat Blanc,” which would’ve prevented Adrien seeing Ladybug at all due to the time difference), it starts getting infuriating.

A best friend is supposed to cover for their friend’s weaknesses. Alya doesn’t do that; she meddles and often drives Marinette’s anxiety even further up a wall with absolutely no consideration for Marinette’s feelings (”Dark Cupid,” “The Puppeteer 2,” “Reflekdoll,” “Miraculous New York”).

And here, she and the other girls are rewarded for it. Luka actively resisted his akumatization whereas the girls gave in immediately, yet Marinette still opens up to them in the end, likely because they had pressured her and made her feel bad for the secrets she was keeping while Luka was willing to actually wait for her to be ready to talk to him. I can’t put into words how frustrating it is watching these girls trample all over Marinette’s feelings, not have their worst actions called out, and then jump cut post-deakumatization to Marinette telling them exactly what they wanted to know about her love life.

You know what this entire episode is really missing, outside of a coherent plot, properly-paced development, and a basic understanding of rewarding a character for things they’ve held firmly to?

It’s missing the apology. Chat Noir apologizes to a bunch of moviegoers and Rose apologizes for the broken dollhouse, but no one apologizes to Marinette for how they treated her, especially not the “friends” who got rewarded in the end.

“Sorry, we shouldn’t have told you that we’d respect your feelings and then showed up unannounced to make you talk about them.”

“We’re sorry we came into your room and invaded your privacy. You were right to be mad at us.”

“Oh my gosh, Marinette, we got akumatized and we’re so sorry for literally all five of us going after you and probably scaring the living daylights out of you.”

And as if that wasn’t enough, guess what else this is missing? It’s kind of important and brought up directly in the episode, yet the episode simultaneously goes out of its way not to bring it up again.

It’s the reason why Marinette didn’t tell the girls about her relationship with Luka. It’s not there - it’s missing - and the girls never try to pursue the subject. They talk about how Marinette didn’t tell them but don’t think for a second that maybe it’s them who have failed as friends. Instead, they don’t guess anything about why Marinette wouldn’t tell them (which is already strange considering how much they already assume about her) and jump straight to, “well clearly we just need to push for her to talk to us.”

Gonna just go out on a limb here and say that maybe - just maybe - Marinette didn’t tell them because they are habitually pushy in everything they do.

Because they would’ve teased her relentlessly about, “ohhhh you’ve got eyes for Luka? what about Aaaaaadrien~? aren’t you sooo tooorn between both of these cute guys?”

Because they would’ve meddled to force her and Luka together and gotten on her case when/if she ever had to bail on him.

Because their intrusion on her feelings for Adrien had caused her nothing but problems and she just wanted to be with Luka in peace without them forcing their way into things.

Because--hey, wild thought--maybe they’re not really friends???

But the episode completely avoids it, because that would’ve meant addressing it; it would’ve meant acknowledging that they messed up, which - fun fact - they actually don’t do in the episode.

They invaded Marinette’s privacy, insisted that she tell them how she feels (not about them of course because that would imply that they felt like they screwed up), and in the end it’s Marinette who gives them exactly what they asked of her, and the closest thing we get to acknowledging anything is Alix telling her/joking with her that they’ll help her confess to whoever she likes as soon as she tells them she’s ready.

That’s not an apology. That’s not an acknowledgment of wrongdoing. Even when the five of them are about to get akumatized, it’s not a circle of them saying, “here’s how I screwed up, I could’ve done better but I didn’t and I lost Marinette because of it.”

No. It’s just them talking about how sad the situation is. Mylene has the closest thing to remorse in saying, “I hoped it would work,” but where does it go? A grand total of nowhere, especially because Marinette still takes the bracelet in the end instead of the girls mutually deciding, “okay, maybe the bracelet was a bad idea; how about we all agree on making something together instead, no requirements attached?”

And then the episode has the gall to act as if Alya has gone through character growth when all they did was put Alya through the same thing that Chloe did. I’ll explain that last bit momentarily, but first let’s talk about the whole “growth” thing.

Because there’s no apology or acknowledgement of wrongdoing, all Alya does when she’s finally alone with Marinette is do a 180 from where she was at the start of the episode, going from, “friends have to tell each other everything,” to, “hey, if you don’t want to tell me, then that’s your right.”

The crucial part that’s supposed to go in the middle is missing. Instead of acknowledging her failures, Alya just cuts straight to “””being a better friend,”““ but storytelling doesn’t work that way.

It literally would have taken zero effort to fit an acknowledgement into that scene. “You don’t have to tell me everything, I get that now. All my meddling’s done is hurt you and I’m so sorry. I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t trust me.”

In a world where Marinette has to apologize for everything, has to learn lessons and suffer because the narrative says so, I will not accept anything less from other characters who are trying to develop and improve. That’s not fair to Marinette, nor has it ever been.

Instead of properly developing Alya, the show does whatever it can to get its audience to root for her as Marinette’s “best friend” (ugh) without having to put in the effort of admitting that Alya hasn’t been Marinette’s “best” friend.

Remember when I brought up Chloe? Yeah, “Malediktator” did a similar thing, showing Chloe doing something awful, then being sad (while not actually acknowledging the thing she did wrong), and in the end she was rewarded with a miraculous prematurely.

One show of character from Chloe and Marinette gave her a miraculous. One show of character from Alya and Marinette told her that she was Ladybug.

(Also, for the record, I think Chloe is far worse than Alya character-wise and I’m not comparing their characters; this is just the simplest comparison I can draw here from a narrative standpoint.)

“Miraculer” is another apt comparison, perhaps even more so. Chloe got Hawk Moth in her head after an akuma landed in her photo of her and Ladybug, but Chloe resisted and fought back, ultimately forcing the akuma out of her and freeing herself from Hawk Moth’s control.

But it wasn’t to develop her character; no, it was to convince the audience of Chloe and Sabrina’s friendship so they’d feel something during Sabrina’s happy flashbacks, then lay the foundation of tricking viewers into believing that Chloe might not go to Hawk Moth’s side.

At the end of the day, it was doing something that’s “never been done before” in order for the character to earn brownie points for something that the writers can just have them do because willpower is an easy thing to just write in. “Gang of Secrets” does the exact same thing when Lady Wifi breaks free from Shadow Moth, with Ladybug even hammering it home by talking about how no one’s ever done it before.

And the pacing is - again - awful. Not only is Ladybug banking on this working when she herself says that it’s never been done, but the conversation between her and Lady Wifi where Ladybug tries to convince her doesn’t even take a minute.

It also has nothing to do with Marinette herself; Ladybug relies on Alya’s adoration/friendship with her as Ladybug (you know, after Alya took a photo of LadyNoir kissing and posted it online without Ladybug’s consent, betrayed her by putting information on the LadyBlog that Hawk Moth was able to take advantage of, and is the only hero outside of Chloe to resist returning a miraculous) in order to break from Hawk Moth’s control, because talking about Marinette with Lady Wifi didn’t even work.

(Ladybug also uses her yoyo as a portal to the Miracle Box when this has never been pre-established to be a thing despite Ladybug acting as if she knew it was; further proof that this episode was rushed.)

And of course talking about Marinette didn’t work, because that would’ve meant convincing Alya that her reason for getting akumatized was “wrong” and the episode didn’t want to do that. It didn’t want someone else actually learning something and feeling bad; surely, this is just Alya being manipulated by Shadow Moth and having the power to break free because Ladybug “needs Rena Rouge” and not because Lady Wifi and her friends are chasing after their supposed best friend and that’s--you know--wrong???

Rena Rouge’s reappearance is also yet another thing the episode refuses to address because it avoids the topic of “but my identity--”. At least “Heart Hunter” had the tact to have Kagami question why Ladybug was giving her the dragon again, but “Gang of Secrets” treads as lightly as possible on any discussion of identities outside of Marinette saying that she can’t, as if it were Marinette who made the choice of concealing her identity and not the basic idea of heroing that has been stressed over and over for the whole show.

Even Plagg of all kwami stated back in “Origins” that no one is supposed to know about secret identities, a rule that continues becoming flaky and muddled with each passing season, almost like they kept attempting to retcon and make the audience dulled to the idea so that the reveal in “Gang of Secrets” would be more acceptable.

But now, with the way they did it and how they don’t even have Tikki comment on the matter, it once again has it look like they’re making it - say it with me, everyone - Marinette’s fault.

Alya says that Marinette has a choice in telling her secret, Marinette insists that she doesn’t and goes on and on about how it’ll change everything, and then just... tells Alya her secret in the end.

And remember all the way back in Season 2? “Sapotis”?

Alya: What were you saying about her secret identity?

Marinette: Ladybug needs it to protect her family and friends. Otherwise the villains could use them to get to her.

Alya: Well, if I knew who Ladybug really was, I'd keep it a secret. I would even help her! Like say, if you were Ladybug, I'd cover for you — when you needed to transform in school, go fight the "baddies", you know?

Marinette: Oh yeah? Well, if I was Ladybug I wouldn't even tell you, to protect you from the "baddies", you know?

Alya: You serious? If I was Ladybug, I'd totally tell you! Because I tell my best friend everything.

And now here we are in “Gang of Secrets,” as if the narrative is saying, “See, Marinette? Alya was right all along, you were just being ridiculous and making yourself suffer for no reason!”

Yet Marinette had a right to keep her secrets. When Alya and Nino learned each other’s identities, Alya took a hit for Nino in “Catalyst” and both of them fell to Scarlet Moth’s akumas. Chloe was a mess and a half because of Hawk Moth knowing her identity. Fu had told Marinette that her miraculous would get taken if she and Chat Noir learned each other’s identities.

The only ones who received no consequences due to someone knowing their identity were Pegase (who Chat Noir and Markov knew), Ryuko (who Chat Noir, Ikari Gozen, and Hawk Moth knew), and Viperion (who Adrien knew). “Chat Blanc” also exists where Marinette got the impression that people discovering her identity would be a disaster, and even all the way back in “Lady Wifi” insisted that not telling anyone her identity was “listening to her head and not her heart,” and the narrative has relentlessly humiliated her for going with her heart, so yeah, probably for the best.

I hate that the episode avoids talking about anything identity-related outside of what comes out of Marinette’s mouth to make it appear like it was her choice all along. I hate that they had Tikki fixate on Marinette’s love problems instead of having her actually support Marinette and admit that Marinette should tell someone before she has a mental breakdown. I hate that the episode inserts Rena Rouge into the plot as if to brush all identity issues away so as to make Marinette’s identity reveal seem less jarring.

Now, of course I’m glad Marinette told someone. Of course I want her to get love and support from someone. Of course I think the benefits outweigh the risks, or I wouldn’t have written multiple fix-its where her identity gets revealed in some way or someone already knows.

But I didn’t want it to be Alya, because I knew how they’d do it. I knew they’d do it wrong and I knew that they wouldn’t have the courage to address Alya’s issues properly.

Those familiar with my blog will know that I’d been taking negative predictions for future seasons for a while and adding them to cards whenever they were proven right. Does anyone remember the Season 4 predictions that were proven correct for “Gang of Secrets,” specifically these ones?

- “Alya will suddenly be portrayed as a good/worthy friend to Marinette in/if there's an episode where Marinette tells her that she's Ladybug”

- “Alya resisting Shadow Moth/fighting back against him will be used to excuse telling Alya Marinette's secret identity“

- “Alya will know that Marinette is Ladybug first because "BFFs" despite being one of the worst candidates for it“

- “The secret that broke Lukanette up will be resolved in episode 3 when Marinette tells Alya“

Each and every one of those were mine, because I knew that whether Season 4 had a proper chronological order or not, the writers would not have the guts to develop Alya first and then have Marinette tell her in a future episode after Alya has properly earned it.

I knew that they wouldn’t take time to develop Alya. I knew that they would have Alya resist Shadow Moth to make Alya look “worthy” of the secret. I knew that Alya would swoop in during the last minute and a half of an episode, insisting that Marinette “didn’t have to tell her anything” when Alya had been pushy and insistent for the entire rest of the episode and the whole series in general, and would ultimately be rewarded with the big secret simply because she’s “the best friend” and that’s it.

The Alya at the end of the episode isn’t the Alya I’ve known for the entire rest of the series before this, or at the very least they turned her into an Alya I don’t recognize.

Alya claims during the ending scene that she knows that Marinette is hiding something beyond her love problems because she - as a reporter and “her best friend” - can sense such things, and all I’m left wondering is

w h e r e ?

Where and when has Alya been suspicious or worried about Marinette keeping a secret from her? What, back in “The Pharoah” where she didn’t immediately disregard Marinette for the role of Ladybug, or “Simon Says” where she vaguely teased Marinette about having a double life, both Season 1 episodes?

Where was Alya in “Truth” saying that she didn’t know Marinette’s secret but knew that she was keeping one? Where was Alya anywhere in Season 3 being concerned that Marinette hasn’t told her something? Where was this “supposedly very observant” Alya when Marinette needed her to out Lila because Lila got her expelled--oh wait, Alya “observed” that Lila did nothing and Marinette was just jealous.

What, is it only now that Alya suddenly “knows” that Marinette is hiding something else? Now, after Alya has already not known that Marinette was literally dating someone, even when Alya had multiples pictures of Marinette and said someone giving each other heart eyes and saw Marinette leaving school with said someone riding on the same bike together, you know, like normal, typical, average friends would?

Where’s the line where Alya acknowledges the problem? Where’s Alya sitting down with Marinette and admitting, “hey, I’m sorry I haven’t noticed this stuff, but I promise I’ll do better starting right now, and that’s how I know now that you’re hiding something else, and I’m sorry it took me so long to realize that it’s been hurting you”?

I can’t tell you where it is, but I can say that it’s certainly not in this episode. 60% of the episode features the Alya we knew from the rest of the series and then switches her out the second she’s de-akumatized for another Alya who hasn’t done anything that the old one has because she pretends like it didn’t happen.

You know how I know? Because of this absolute gut punch of a line that showed that the series wanted to handwave everything away.

“I know how to keep a secret.”

...Really? Does she now? Well, I hope everyone remembered my point about “Animan” and “The Puppeteer 2,” because I’m bringing it right back.

Considering that “Truth” has been burned into all of our memories, we all definitely remember when Truth shoots Alya and questions her on Marinette’s secret, to which Alya states that Marinette’s secret is, “She’s in love with Adrien Agreste.” Now, at the time of Season 4′s airing, this is very much not a secret, as most characters already knew about Marinette’s crush, to the point where it’d been broadcast on television during Season 2.

But do you know when it was actually a secret? Back in Season 1, specifically in the episode “Animan” where Alya told Nino.

And not only did she tell Nino, but she lied to Marinette by claiming that she didn’t, acting as if Nino knew that Marinette had a crush but didn’t know who she was crushing on, which is then directly proven false as Nino accidentally implies that he does know who it is. This is also after Alya had gotten on Marinette’s case for trying to set her up with Nino, and then she had the gall to say that she wouldn’t spill Marinette’s secret because she, and I quote, “doesn't go around making decisions for other people,“ a statement that is directly contradicted by this little thing known as everything Alya has ever said and done in the entire series.

And while Marinette meddling in Alya’s love life actually ended up working out for Alya, Alya meddling in Marinette’s by telling Nino who Marinette is crushing on comes back to bite Marinette - not Alya (because of course) - in the infamous episode of “The Puppeteer 2,” where Marinette realizes that Alya really did tell Nino that she was crushing on Adrien.

Marinette: You told me you wouldn't tell Nino!

Alya: I haven't told him. Right, Nino? I didn't tell you anything. (elbows him)

Nino: She didn't tell me. And besides, I told her I wouldn't tell.

Then, when she’s called out on it, Alya lies again, and shamelessly so.

Marinette: Why did you tell Nino everything? You promised you wouldn't!

Alya: I didn't, I swear! Besides, even if I had told him everything, he would still be clueless. Ugh, who cares anyway? I've set everything up with Nino, who doesn't know a thing, so you can finally pour your heart out to Adrien, girl!

And now, here we are one season later - and not even half of a season if you go by production code order - and Alya claims that she knows how to keep a secret.

No. No, she does not. In fact, she does even worse because she won’t even admit when she’s spilled said secret. I absolutely refuse to accept that Alya is “worthy” or “deserving” of learning that Marinette is Ladybug when she couldn’t even keep a basic secret like who her friend was crushing on.

And no, it didn’t matter that Nino was her boyfriend, or that maybe she thought it would work out because Nino was friends with Adrien. By that logic, Alya would tell Adrien that Marinette is Ladybug if she heard that Ladybug is who Adrien was crushing on and we all know how that would’ve gone.

Marinette has a right to tell her secret to whoever she wants and I’m glad that a burden has been lifted from her, but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy that it’s Alya. That doesn’t mean I have to be happy that, after so many moments of Alya disrespecting Marinette’s feelings, she is the one who gets to hear the big secret that the fandom has been waiting for someone to find out about since the very start of the series.

Luka said it best in “Truth” that the truth is meant to be shared, not taken by force, but Marinette was forced to tell Alya by the narrative because Alya is her supposed “best friend.” It pushed Marinette to her breaking point, forced her to break up with the guy who has respected her agency and feelings since the day they met, and gave her a version of her “best friend” with the same name and face but with none of the responsibility from previous events so that said version was there at the right time and the right place to hear what had to be heard.

And in the end, I end up feeling nothing. Marinette doesn’t even have a “Marinette” reaction to saying it as one would expect; for her to blurt it out and then immediately start panicking until Alya hugs her to calm her down. Instead, Marinette just says it and stares silently at Alya - after blabbing this huge, very big deal of a secret - until Alya goes in for a hug (the “happy/hopeful” ending of which is why I feel like this episode also gets less flak, as the previous two ended off rather depressing/upsetting).

It’s off. Everything is off. The pacing, the delivery, and the logic that the episode uses. The emotion in Marinette’s voice when she’s rambling about how hard it is to keep her secret is so powerful, but then the ending hits and she just says it, breaking the momentum they had going. They pulled the card of Alya walking away too soon when they could’ve saved it, having Marinette go quiet and letting Alya take a few steps away in order to let the moment build before Marinette finally blurts out the secret she’s been painfully holding in.

But they didn’t, and I’m so many levels of dissatisfied. I wasn’t against the idea of Alya learning Marinette’s secret at some point (though honestly, Alix would’ve been a better pick considering that Bunnyx will know eventually anyway, and I say that not even liking Alix!), but not now; not when Alya had so much to work towards.

And now what? What happens now? Now Alya will turn against Lila, not because she learned to have faith and believe in Marinette, but because Marinette is Ladybug, which disproves Lila’s ultimate lie that got Alya’s attention in the first place? Now Alya will be supportive and less teasing/mocking whenever Marinette will be late, not because she understands that Marinette isn’t perfect and has so many other things on her mind, but because she’s Ladybug and has “hero stuff” to take care of? Now Alya will be careful about what she puts on the LadyBlog, not because she respected Ladybug and what Ladybug would want, but because Ladybug is now her best friend and that changes everything?

Because now, Alya has a free pass to all of that, the show making her spontaneously “developed” now so they won’t have to develop her later, and disappointing doesn’t even begin to describe it.

[theyarebothgunshot]

[part 1/2]

Hi, I’ve fallen in the cockles dumpster years ago and I don’t know how to reach the surface anymore.

we can say I’m a newbie on your inbox and I just thought we could all tinhat a little bit about one of the things that sold me on cockles to be a real thing: honcon 2017.

Here’s the list of things I can’t find a platonic heterosexual explanation for:

(Funny but useless foreword, a few days before the con a fan tweeted a photo of a rainbow she saw when her flight land in honolulu and said she took it as a sign that was gonna be a gay weekend, and man she was right lol)

1- Misha flew to a hawaii on thursday just like all the other guests who were supposed to be at the con way before J2 did.

We know j2 stopped shooting the same day/the day after because on friday Jensen was spotted by a fan on a plane to honolulu even tho he was expected to be there on sunday.

while Jared preferred spending that bit of free time at home. (Gen posted a few instagram stories of jared and the kids in Texas.) Jensen went straight to misha instead.

Even tho at the previous con j2 talked about how the following weeks were going to be full of work commitments and between work and cons so close to one another they couldn’t see the families as much.

I’m not saying Jensen didn’t miss his wife and kid. He loves them and clearly meant it when he said he missed them so much. That’s why it was surprising seeing him join misha so early. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say it was a planned trip to spend time together.

2- I think it’s positive to say he was there early for Misha and only misha since that night a fan took a picture with them at an hotel bar. She posted it on instagram and said it was just the two of them, then she had to put the account on private since too many people were asking questions.

It’s strange how we only got one photo of that night tho, they’re always super nice with fans when being approached and usually after the first brave soul finds the courage to ask everyone else follow through.

Again I think they clearly wanted to be alone that night. No fans no castmates.

Maybe they were celebrating something?

3- Then the panel happened.

We all remember Jensen showing us how bad his kink for misha’s weird accents have gotten, how cheerful and at ease they were on stage.

Even I could feel the love was in the air and I live on the other side of the ocean!

welcome to the dumpster, nonnie! i love all of this a lot. i *just* got your part two and i am putting it and my reaction under the cut!! 

[part 2/2]

4 - Jensen also bought matching shirts for his friends. One black shirt for him and an identical one for his bro. But misha’s was red cause he knows him well enough to notice he never wears black shirts.

I mean Jensen has a history of showing affection through gifts, (I have a few examples on my mind but no time to write it all down now)

That was a nice thing to do.

5- Least but not last

THE DINNER STORY.

I don’t care if it’s been years I’m still not over how sweet that moment was.

The question was an easy generic one, It took misha less than two minutes to answer.

But then mr. 10 years. same bar, same table. same company. grabs the microphone and procede to share with us one the sweetest memory of Misha he got.

I mean it was so unexpected. Unlike Jared and Misha he’s careful about what he think is appropriate and what’s not.

In my mind it sounded like: “Listen I know it doesn’t answer your question but I’ve just spent a good weekend with this person right here, that I clearly love and care for, and I’m feeling soft, so let me tell you about how I realized I was whipped on him since our very first date”

Again I find it curious Jensen was reminiscing about how they first got together on that particular weekend.

The same one he decided to join misha early just to be with him.

That was one of the moments I realized there’s no way this is a platonic relationship.

Ok this turned out way longer than I expected.

I clearly miss jenmish so much I can’t stop blabber about them.

I’m sorry

Polaroid anon

first of all: don’t be sorry, i truly loved this because i felt like i was seeing the panel again in my minds eye while i was reading your message. 

second of all: you are absolutely right about everything except for calling misha’s shirt red. it was orange, which is misha’s favorite color, which makes it even more special that jensen got that one for him. 

i also think that jensen went there early just for mish, which is just. a lot. it reminds me of another con, where jensen could have gone home already but he waited for misha who had to do something else there the next day, and then two days later they were spotted together i think at the airport. 

i 100% agree that the fact that jensen shared that story about one of their first dinners is very special and rare. especially because in the past, whenever somebody wanted to hear a story from them, they both never knew what to share (probably because of lot of their stories are not suitable to share tbh) and to me it almost felt like he really thought about what he could share and what he would feel comfortable with, after all those times where he just went ‘shit idk what to say’. 

and what he shared just felt so romantic? like. the look on misha’s face when jensen was talking was also so soft, he was clearly thinking back on that moment. a moment they both remembered all those years later. i mean at that point they had known each other for nearly 10 years and they still remembered that one particular night. it made an impression on both of them. it was a date. and then to top it off jensen added that he thought to himself ‘but i think i love him a little bit more too’. wow. 

see, no need to apologize for talking a lot, as i clearly do the same sjfhshf.

[buckysdolls]

Red Dress

One Shot- Bucky Barnes x Reader

A/N- So I listened to Taylor Swift’s ‘Wildest Dreams’ whilst writing this an it gave me the inspiration for the whole concept of the fic, certain lyrics represent a certain memory in the reader and Bucky’s relationship. Sorry if it’s not your music taste but I hope you still read it and like it <3

Summary- The reader recalls her memory’s with Bucky as she struggles to cope with his loss due to the snap heard around the world…

Warnings- fluff, sadness, loss, happy ending tho <3

‘I thought, "Heaven can't help me now"

Nothin' lasts forever

But this is gonna take me down

He's so tall and handsome as hell

He's so bad but he does it so well’

You’d heard of Bucky, Steve shared multiple happy memories of the times he and Bucky spent together. He only ever painted Bucky in a positive light, Steve always described him as funny, a man of honour and his hero. So, seeing Bucky for the first time was strange, he looked so tired, drained of happiness… worn out. Steve had asked you to join his cause, and you agreed with Steve, the Avengers only ever meant to be helpful and you truly believed in the cause.

“Steve” You heard Sam shout out catching your attention, both you and Steve rushed to the next room where Sam had been keeping an eye on Bucky. You stood with your arms folded over your chest and watched on as Bucky began to stir from a deep slumber. Your heart ached as you watched him, you couldn’t explain it in that moment as to why but apart of you wanted to help him, even if you we’re never going to see him after this. His hair that draped an inch from his shoulders hung over his face, covering his drooping eyes that were starting to open. The stubble on his face hugged his perfectly carved jawline. Though dishevelled he was handsome, an instant attraction had your eyes burned onto him, his bad boy image had your stomach twisting as if butterflies were fluttering all over. Your attraction to this man wasn’t going to end well and you knew it. You watched him look around, his eyes settled on you and all you could do was curve the corners of your lips and smile. He grabbed the metal contraption that was crushing his metal arm, keeping him in place. He looked over again recognising Steve.

“Steve?” his voice was groggy and rough, but soft you could hear the fear and pain in his voice.

“Which Bucky am I talking too?” Steve questioned slowly approaching Bucky, Steve had informed you of the situation Bucky had found himself in, the trauma he’d been through. You found yourself watching intently to watch Bucky’s reaction.

“Your mom’s name was Sarah”

You watched as Steve breathed a sigh of relief.

A small smile crept on the face of Bucky as if he started to remember something.

“You used to wear newspapers in your shoes” Steve knew that he was talking to his Bucky. You watched on as Steve explained to Bucky the trouble he’d caused; your heart sank watching Bucky beat himself up over it.

“It’s nothing we can’t fix together” Your voice was quiet out of kindness as you tried to lift Bucky’s mood, Steve turned to look at you with a smile as Bucky nodded.

“She’s pretty” Bucky mumbled as he motioned his head to you.

“Definitely our Bucky in there” Steve chuckled as he looked over to you. You tried to hide biting your lip as Steve turned to you replacing it with a quick smile, trying to remain silent.

“It’s one of the nicer views I’ve woken up too recently” Bucky moaned as his head fell backwards trying to regain feeling in his body. Steve released him as you and Steve helped him stand up allowing him to control his balance. He was so tall and heavy from his muscular body. The feeling of his flesh hand holding onto you electrocuted you as you looked up from his hand to him. He’d felt it too, the lingering look he gave your hand that clutched onto him before looking into your eyes was magical. Looking into your sparkling eyes made his eyes glimmer the slightest, his face loosened as you watched him try to understand the feelings that were flowing through his veins.

This was the first of many moments you shared with Bucky and you’d never forget what his first words to you were. “She’s pretty”

‘Say you'll remember me

Standin' in a nice dress

Starin' at the sunset, babe’

Steve had trusted you to look out for Bucky in Wakanda as he underwent special treatment. The time you’d spent together was lovely. Watching Bucky flourish in his new surroundings was something you’d never seen before. How one man, so disturbed had grown into a man who could now enjoy a simple, stress free life. He’d confided in you one night, thanking you for showing him the path to happiness in Wakanda and for looking out for him. Never giving up. Once he received his new arm his confidence improved. Time had passed on, you and Bucky were constantly around each other, he wanted you with him, so he knew you were safe, though you were there for Bucky, Bucky felt things he hadn’t felt in the longest time. The thought of loosing the one person who believed in him was devastating…

“What are these?” you pointed to yellow tulips that were sitting in a vase in the middle of the small table that sat in the kitchen.

“Flowers you dummy” Bucky replied as he came up behind you, the hairs on your skin dances as his hands fell on your shoulders with gentle squeezes almost massaging. You loved how traditional Bucky still was, though times had changed, and he’d been through hell and back he always found a way to be a gentleman.

“Why did you get flowers?”  You turned to face Bucky who was wearing a nice shirt and shorts with a grin on his face. Though your eyebrows were furrowed that quickly changed once the palm of his hand rested on your right cheek.

Bucky had fallen for you the moment he’d seen you, the moment your words left your mouth was the uplift he needed. You were the reason he knew he needed to get better. You were going to be one to bring him back to life and give him a heart filled with love and affection. The moment he felt your hand in his… he knew. He knew that everything he was going to go through was for you.

Your cheek melted into the palm of his hand as you let your head rest. You wet your lips biting them in the process trying to hold back a smile. Though you and Bucky had never really spoken about the relationship you two had grown, you were always falling asleep in each other’s arms, always laughing together. Giving each other tiny bouts of affection…a kiss on the cheek, a kiss on the top of your hand, a kiss on the forehead before you both lingered touching foreheads enjoying the intimacy.

“Put on a nice dress.”

“Huh?”

“You have an hour to get ready. We need to head out before the sun goes down. No more questions… trust me”

You took your hour to make sure you looked and felt pretty. Your dress was the colour of red roses with tiny white flower patterns, the dress was tight but comfortable as it hugged your curves and the sweetheart neckline lifted your bust, the sleeves hung halfway down your arms as the sleeves rippled. You made your way downstairs to find Bucky holding out his arm for you to hold on to going down the last couple steps of the house you stayed in together. He gently let you go, turning you around and placing his hands over your eyes, you giggled as he did so.

“Bucky? What are you doing?”

“Just walk forward Y/N. I’ll lead you.” You slowly walked forward without your sight everything felt silent just both of your breathing filled the atmosphere. After what seemed ages but was only seconds Bucky spoke.

“I’m going to remove my hands, but keep your eyes closed!”

You squeezed shut your eyes, to stop yourself from peeking, the urge to quickly open them lose them was high. The noise of a door sliding open made you raise your eyebrows. Bucky’s footstep worked their way back to you, the touch of his hands back over your eyes made you jump but smile, you couldn’t hide your excitement. He instructed you to walk again then warned you to take small step down. You felt the cool evening air hit your skin and you could feel the slight breeze of wind dance in your hair. Bucky stopped you and stepped away then slowly allowed you to open your eyes.  Bucky was sat on a plethora of blankets and pillows surrounded by picnic food and prosecco. He was smiling his devilishly handsome smile that killed you inside whenever he did it. You took in the view of Wakanda, realising the sun was going down, he patted the ground motioning for you to sit next to him. You were pleasantly surprised and in awe of how perfect Bucky and the whole set up was. You took a seat next to him as you both looked at each other.

“You like it?”

“Like it Bucky? I love it!” You whispered in wonder. You felt the same feeling in your stomach as you did the first time you met Bucky, those damned butterflies. Bucky pulled you closer by your waist scotting you closer to him, his arm laid across your shoulder.

“You looking amazing Y/N” He didn’t look at you when he said it and he took a huge breath of air before saying it, the hesitation in Bucky’s voice was prominent but you could tell it was his nerves.

“Are you nervous Bucky?” You turned your body slightly to face him with a huge smile, realising how shy Bucky was suddenly being. Bucky scrunched up his face before shaking his head then nodding his head and shaking it again. You laughed at his playful yet honest expression.

“Why are you nervous?”

“A beautiful girl, who’s been there for me since I can really remember, a breath-taking sunset… I’m a little nervous”

“You’re the Winter Soldier Bucky…”

“That maybe so but I’m never going to forget seeing you walk down those stairs in this unbelievably amazing dress! I’ll remember you in this dress for the rest of my life”

“I really look that good huh?” You smirked, bumping your body against his, you watched as Bucky gave you a chefs kiss.

You and Bucky enjoyed the rest of the evening as the dusky sunset turned to night, by the end you were wrapped in blankets, settled in between Bucky’s legs, his arms draped over your shoulder talking about everything and anything.

 ‘His hands are in my hair, his clothes are in my room

And his voice is a familiar sound

Nothin' lasts forever

But this is gettin' good now’

The door slammed behind you both, though it didn’t distract you. Your mouth clung onto his, every inch of your mouth exploring each other’s. Bucky had you held up against him one arm wrapped around your waist, his hand holding your neck and his other hand tangled in your as you both moaned pulling on it occasionally as he was feeling the pleasure. Each movement of your lips moving in sync feeling deeper and more passionate. Your legs were locked and wrapped around his waist, not wanting to part from his body. His lips left your as he began kissing your neck making you fling your head back enjoying the sweet pleasure of his kisses. The passionate exchange resorted to your bedroom, you stood in front of him as he looked down at you… you were both fully clothed just looking at each other, smiling as you both knew this is what you wanted. he was blown away by your natural beauty and the confidence you exhibited, he leaned down and began to lift your dress, slowly, he was enjoying watching every inch of you be revealed to him, you lifted your hands to allow the dress to come up over your head. Bucky let the dress slip from his hands before undoing the clasp of your bra, the sensual touch of his fingertips on your back made you crave him so much, you wiggled out your underwear, the whole time your eyes never left one another. It was your turn, the pads of your fingers made Bucky moan and smirked as you let your fingers trace up the sides of his core as you lifted his vest up and over. You let your hands fall flat on his chest, lapping up his picturesque physique, as you did this he unbuckled, stepping out of his jeans and boxers. The silence that filled the room as you both looked at each other’s body was fulfilling until you both broke it immediately crashing into each other, reigniting your passionate exchange, Bucky laid you down on the bed, his lips trailed from your lips, along your neck, down your stomach and along your thighs. You moaned arching your back at every kiss, your nails digging into the flesh of his back. You begged him to give you everything and he did. That night of passionate, loving and playful sex was stunning. You were laid in his arms, his lips placing kisses on your head, his finger stroking your bare shoulder. Life was good.

It’s a shame it wouldn’t last forever…

  ‘And when we've had our very last kiss

But my last request is

Say you'll remember me’

Being reunited with the team after a while was amazing, seeing everyone faces gave this horrific situation a glimpse of happiness. The team didn’t have time to enjoy a reunion or even begin to understand the fact you and Bucky had become a coupe. You all stood on the earth of Wakanda which was now a battlefield. You were Avenger’s it was your job to protect people, and in order to protect those people it was time to protect Vision from Thanos. You watched as these creatures slowly tried to enter through the barricades Wakanda has put up to protect the place. Bucky’s flesh arm was wrapped around your waist as you stood together, his hand settling on your hips. His metal arm holding his most prized weapon. Your arm rested up his back slowly stroking the hairs on his neck. You both didn’t say anything in this moment, you just held onto each other. It was better left unsaid, anything that would be said would hurt more if something happened to either of you. You listened to the plan and saw the barricades come down slowly. You both turned to each other, as a single tear dribbled down your cheek. His thumb wiped it away as he moved your hair over your shoulder letting his hand settle on your neck. You rolled your lips and closed your eyes not wanting to let go of this moment. He couldn’t help but pull you in for a passionate kiss wanting to feel your body against his, your soft sweet lips, giving him hope and love. Pulling away breathless he mouthed ‘I love you’ before running into battle… your heart stopped momentarily as you too found yourself running into battle amongst everyone else.

During the fight you never realised it would be your last kiss… the last time you’d feel Bucky’s hands roam your body, the last time you’d feel his scratchy beard against your skin, the beard you’d grown to love as it tickled your skin whenever he’d kiss you.

Watching Thanos snap his fingers you felt a freezing breeze sweep over you as you laid on the ground feeling broken. You coughed up blood, the pain of broken bones washing over you.

“Steve. Y/N” Your eyes shifted from Thanos to Bucky who appeared from around the corner, a smile appeared on your lips seeing Bucky still alive though clearly riddled with PTSD and pain, his eyes were cold with fright. The smile faded as you began to watch pieces of Bucky begin to rip away and float to the ground in tiny pieces. Your eyes widened in shock unable to comprehend what you were seeing. Steve picked you up along the way as he ran to Bucky, catching him before falling to his knees, pieces of him were slipping through both of your fingers.

“Your red dress… I remember. I’ll see you again” Bucky’s words faded out as he was no longer there. He was gone. Vanished as if he was never alive in the first place. You screamed out in pain, those butterflies in your stomach had crashed into each other and died.

“Bring him back Steve” You cried to him slapping your hands on his chest. Steve cradled as you both watched people fade away into nothingness.

“Bring him back Steve, right now!” You continued to sob your slaps becoming punches repeatedly.

As your cried in pain all you could think about was the first night Bucky had told you how he truly felt about you, that night you watched the sunset, wrapped up in each other bodies.. the night you wore that nice red dress.

 ‘Say you'll see me again’

5 years had accumulated to his moment… and if it didn’t work, there was no more hope left on this fucking planet you thought. Your thoughts raced about how different your life could have been if Bucky was here, would you be married… would you be a mom? All these options were ripped away from you. You wouldn’t move on, there was no moving on from Bucky. Though Steve encouraged you to do so it was impossible, you reminded Steve that Bucky would never give up on him giving Steve the reality check he needed.

Watching Hulk snap his fingers made your heart stop and your eye become glass like as pools of water covered your eyes. You let those butterflies gradually begin fluttering in the pitch of your stomach. You looked outside the big glass windows to see colour, trees fully grown, flowers in bloom and the sun shining.

Round 2 proved to be even worse, less of you fighting was daunting, beginning to feel impossible. You’d managed to bring yourself to your feet and head to the battlefield to stand in line with Steve. You both exchanged looks, he knew you were shattered into a million pieces and if this didn’t work he knew you were gone. You knew he was broken and had nothing left to give. A cracked voice spoke over the earpieces you guys had put in…

“On your left” your eyes frantically searched the skies, your body twisting left to right to catch a glimpse of him, you knew it was Sam. There was no noise just utter silence amongst the destruction, you and Steve shot each other hopeful looks. Time felt as though it stopped as you saw Sam fly over bringing with him a gust of wind as he settled down next to Steve. You bit your lip as Sam nodded at you, he motioned his head for you to look behind. A lump in your throat formed as you couldn’t hold in your tears anymore… thousands of orange spiralling circles floated round you and Steve. You mouth hung open before your cried silently allowing your lips to turn into the biggest smile you’d exposed in 5 years. Bucky walked out from one of the circles with a grin. You turned back around not able to look at him, you wanted to compose yourself. The touch of his hand resting on your waist sent simultaneous shivers down your spine, you found yourselves in the same position as before. Your sides touching and his hand gripping so tightly on your waist. You finally turned your heads to look at each other, his god damn smile.

“I told you I’d see you again” Bucky squeezed you into his side as he let his head fall on to your neck sighing in relief.

“You did” You laughed through your tears as you lifted his head up from your shoulder letting your foreheads rest together.

“You…that night… your red dress… was all I thought about” You could hear Bucky’s vulnerability through the muffled and breathless tone of voice. You shhh’d him planting the tiniest kiss on his lips, those butterflies in your stomach fluttering in full force.

[heiayen]

anon: Requests are open? Ohhh, may I ask for Albedo fic with a reader (can be platonic or romantic) who unhealthily obsesses over their interests? Like how Albedo gets stuck with his experiments for days, a context example could be the reader being obsessed with reading books that they end up not sleeping just to finish the whole series of a very good book! Or making a starconch collection by setting up a camp near the beach for weeks to gather them all, I think the dynamic/hypocrisy would be a funny and cutesy one. Ah I hope this wasn't too detailed tho!

little problems - albedo x gn reader

fluff, reader loves books and writing way too much someone stop them, 3rd person view

thank you for requesting!! i myself have right now quite an obsession with writing so this was funny to write!

no spoilers, word count: 855 + fic utc.

"oh? and this comes from someone who's literally falling asleep on my lap, with a book in-"

"albedo, you know... you have quite an obsession with your experiments and alchemy, you know?"

"oi, you meanie! i just needed to finish reading this, you know... the plot was way too good to left this story in the middle, and since it was just 2am i decided..."

it was his... free day. mandatory free day actually. after all, his partner couldn't bear with him locking himself for hours and hours and even day, just for "some experiments". which, honestly, was really understandable.

they were sitting under a tree, albedo with a notebook in his hand, slowly sketching someone, and [y/n], with a book and their head on his lap. it was a peaceful moment, really...

"...and i kinda ended reading at 5am, instead of earlier... but, still better than you." [y/n] huffed at him.

ah, right. his peaceful moment wasn't really long.

there was a tiny, tiny problem. (well, not really a problem for him, but for someone else...) he wasn't the only one who was terrible at managing time, especially when it comes to his "quite an obsession". the truth was, [y/n] had this problem too. he would spend days at his experiments, expeditions, and they would spend hours with their books and stories.

and it was incredibly funny.

he would be doing something in his office, focused on his work and he would hear someone's knocking at the doors. he would say that he's busy, or even ignore it, too focused on the experiment, and then...

wait, someone entered the room-

"oh my, here you are!" [y/n] said as they smiled, "i've been looking for you the whole day. or, rather two days."

two days... did he just spent two days in this room, busy experimenting again?! well, it would make sense, since he took a nap earlier and probably didn't realized that another day passed.

"i was busy with this experiment. i was trying to find another way you can use crystal chunks. they are effective in forging and alchemy, but i'm sure that this is not the end. i just need to find another object crystal chunks go into interaction with. do you have any ideas?" but [y/n] just looked at him in confusion. crystal chunks? interactions? alchemy? forging?

"ah, scrap that. i think we can use some elemental magic on it to see what will happen. but, where i can find people wiling to help... do you know anyone, [y/n]?"

"wait, wait, wait! it's too complicated, besides, i have more important questions for you." seeing albedo so excited about something he liked was always an amazing view, but sometimes... they would get lost right after the first sentence. or after first word.

"hm, what it is?"

"when was the last time you took a shower? or eat something? hmmm?" [y/n] walked closer to the table and leaned forward, awaiting for the answer.

and albedo just blinked.

"oh, this is a good question..."

"albedo!"

ah, funny times. but, it was even funnier when the roles were reverse, with [y/n] being oh so focused on their books.

"i'm not sure if reading a book and writing at the same time can be effective-"

"shhh, i'm writing!" they hushed him up and went back to reading. it wasn't anything unusual, just [y/n] writing at late hours in their bed and trying to read a book at the same time. honestly, nothing new.

"you should go to sleep, staying up late like that is not the best for you" he said as he sat at the oposite side of the bed, locking his eyes at them. their whole attention was on the book, lips slightly parted, they were holding a pen in second hand and playing with it. and albedo was just watching them in awe, his mind-

suddenly, they blinked. and then again, but this time for longer, and then they closed the book.

"actually, i think you might be right..." they smiled sheepishly.

ah, truly funny times.

"alchemy experiments requires times and patience. if not impossible, then it is very hard to finish a complicated experiment in less than two days. beside, being an alchemist is my job." he explained and earned a light chuckle in response.

"was playing with mint grass related to your knight duties?" they asked teasingly. oh no.

[y/n] already knew the answer, and he knew it too.

"this one was an exception." he sighed and put his head against the tree. they could tease each other the whole day, about how both of them suck at managing time, and how reading and writing at the same time was not very effective, and many, many other things.

suddenly, he felt something shift on his lap and when he looked down, he saw his lover putting the book next to them and getting more comfortable.

"can you wake me up later?" they asked quietly, and albedo couldn't resist the urge to smile.

"of course, love." he looked back at his notebook, with already started drawing.

guess he needs to start over.

my hand slipped and i did it by accident ehe- pretty much wanted to just start doing requests BUT i ended up writin' this one fully. it's 2am god help me-

reader trying to read and write at the same time is something i quite often do- and i often forget about one thing theeen have sudden realization "oh no i was supposed to be writin'-" so yes. thank you once again for requestin' i really hope it was good/not ooc/whatever!!

[chellestrash]

Casual!Neil Headcanons

warnings: mentions of sex

authors note: okay christ, finally! I promised these headcaonons some time ago so im really sorry im just posting them now. I dont have much time to write since my bachelor's degree prep is taking most of my free time right now. Im not sure how I did with these I hope you’ll enjoy this and please let me know if you did.

Thank you all for your support and patience, I appreciate it a lot.

- Neil would never complain about what he does for a living, but saving the world from the potential threat of world war 3 and other disasters does get a bit tiring after a while

- So as much as he appreciates his work, he enjoys his downtime a bit more

- You usually spend your time off together, enjoying each other's company when you don't have to worry about running around the world and reversing yourselves for some bizarre reason.

- On the days he's not needed at Tenet, he never puts his suits on.

- He's a hoodie and sweatpants kinda guy but not many people know about it.

- Not many people get to see that side of him.

- But you do.

- You like seeing him relaxed like this, in his a bit oversized hoodie you plan on stealing later.

- In his loose trousers that seem to be at least 15 times more comfortable than his formal trousers.

- You usually spend a lot of time together during those days.

- Sometimes you go out, on walks, trips, sometimes even bike rides.

- And other times you just stay inside for a while, together.

- Neil cooks, and he's good at it, he knows it but won’t admit to it, definitely not in form of you.

- He finds joy in surprising you with different interesting dishes from time to time but what he enjoys most is seeing your reaction when he prepares your favorite food.

- Hot tea is an essential part of his day.

- He's not much of a coffee guy but yes, tea?

- You stopped counting how many cups he can drink per day.

- His favorite past time activities include reading, cooking, and playing chess…with himself

- You still find it funny sometimes but more so just extremely impressive.

- You did manage to put his own spin oh his hobby and nude chess became a thing you two did quite often.

- „It's a pleasure for both your body and soul.” He says. sitting on the couch without his shirt on as you sit on the floor in your underwear and try to focus on remembering who’s turn was it.

- Ask him to prepare some drinks and the fun usually lasts the whole evening.

- His mornings off are usually very calm and slow.

- You both wake up usually around the same time and get the kitchen together.

- You often help him around the kitchen, it's nice, you enjoy it.

- He prepares your breakfast and you prepare his.

- It's just one of the things that came naturally to you two.

- It's like a little gif for each other early in the day.

- On some days tho, he liked to sleep in.

- He enjoys staying in bed with you for a while.

- You lay together, cuddled up together.

- You mumble a quiet „morning” as he strokes your head softly.

- „Do we have any plans today?” You ask and he switches his position to wrap his arms tenderly around you.

- He pulls you in closer and buries his face in the nape of your neck.

- „Plan is, whoever leaves the bed first, has to wash the dishes from yesterday.”

- „Right, what if I have to shower?”

- „I don't care love.”

- „What if I tell you I have to shower and ask you to come with me?”

- Before you know it he carries you staring to the bathroom.

- He enjoys morning sex for sure.

- „If we're not counting breakfast, this might be my favorite way to start the day.”

- Later he often enjoys naps (I mean come on have you seen how sleepy he was in the movie?!)

- Sometimes he falls asleep while you two are watching a movie, and very often, he was the one who picked that movie in the first place.

- The evenings he prefers to spent inside.

- Sure he’ll go out from time to time, he'll have a few drinks and some fun but he does enjoy spending time alone, or alone with you a bit more.

- He often stays up for a long time, reading a book in bed.

- You woke up to him reading at 2 or 3am more time than you probably remembered.

- You don't want to disturb him because you know how much he enjoys this but at some point, you sit up on the bed next to him.

- „Is a good read?” You ask and he snaps out of his thoughts immediately.

- „What time is it? …shit.” He looks at the clock „How did I do that again?”

- You shrug with a small smile and he outs the book away quickly.

- „Right, come on, you should get some sleep love.”

- He pulls you close so you can rest your head on his chin and turns the night light off.

- „If ill sleep in tomorrow ill tell John it was your fault.”

[charmspoint]

Mars Red: Anime vs Manga pt 1

Alright so I promised myself that I would do my best not to compare the anime and the manga too much because the anime isnt the adaptation of the manga but the adaptation of the stage play and since I haven't watched the stage play I don't know which one is staying more loyal to the original and which one is adding stuff in/cutting stuff out. That being said if anyone did watch the stage play and can answer these questions please come talk to me I'm very curious. So that being said I'll do my best not to mention too much manga only scenes like Suwa's backstory, Takeuchi, Yamagami and Suwa doing slice of life lab stuff, or the conflict between Suwa and Kurusu. The anime may get to this stuff later, it might not I wont judge it for not including it rn even if I feel that the conflict between Suwa and Kurusu should be developed more consistently what did we have maybe one scene? That being said while I can't compare it on different scenes I sure as hell can compare it on scenes they share with each other. I may not know which one is more loyal to the source material but I sure as hell can say which one is more effective tl;dr: It's the manga, read the manga its more effective and it only has 9 chapters so far, please join me in hell under the cut

That being said I'll be comparing the execution of two scenes

1. Conversation between Suwa and Akesato

So the conversation between these two is mostly fine honestly, though the reason Suwa even went to see her (that she reminded him of someone he knew as a human and which turned out to be his little sister) is missing, which kinda gives the whole scene a slightly different tone. The manga has a much slower, softer pace to it, Suwa really comes across as more somber instead of coming in here to sleep in some girls lap, in the manga he keeps his distance for the most of the conversation before sitting next to her when he starts opening up about his past.

Like I don't think it's bad for anime Suwa to have sought out some human contact but it does leave quite a different impression about him. Manga Suwa leaves a much more thoughtful, mature impressions, he never once asks to touch Akesato in anyway and mostly refers to her as a child, but doesn't patronize her. It very much comes across as a tone of a dotting older relative because you know, she reminds him of a family member he had forgotten. Idk I just like the image the manga paints of him better, he comes across as this distant person but also a kind and mature one, which isn't the Suwa we often get to see on the field. I just don't think anime brought across the same feeling. To me it just made it feel like his very goal was to come in here and lay in someone's lap whereas Suwa in the manga is v much there to scout and meeting Akesato is a sheer coincidence based on his hazy memories and so a long lost feeling of attachment.

Anyway, lets talk about uh

In the manga Suwa has yet to be unmasked. And for a good reason. The anime doesn't set it up very well I think that 'I'll lose control' line is the only set up we get and far too late considering it's happening now. In the manga we have a whole lil slice of life chapter in which multiple different things are introduced, one of which is the fact that Suwa constantly wears his mask because he spent a long time as a feral vampire and if he smells human blood he will go feral. It's kind of...very disappointing to see this moment that I felt would be rather monumental in the manga (cuz feral vampires are way scarier in the manga I'll talk about that later) just kinda...pass here. Suwa unbuckles his own mask too??? And then at the end of the episode he takes it off willingly??? In a district very much swarming with humans??? Some of which are people he works with??? I think the screen writers forgot that the idea of 'a character takes off his mask to show his true emotions' doesn't really work if said character will go on a murder frenzy if he has his mask off. This is what I mean when I say that the manga takes its characters more seriously and is more impactful. The manga simply thinks more about how its characters would act and react to things. In the manga Akesato doesn't even take off his mask, she just hugs him and that gets her close enough to him that he freaks out, because his mask isn't as thick as usual. Just to that much he reacts somewhat violently in pushing her away and it leaves you wondering what would it be like if it was completely off. It really makes the anime Suwa just plopping on her lap out of his own free will even more meh :/

dw he immediately apologizes after this cuz he seriously didn't mean to hurt her he just lost control.

But that's what I mean, the manga makes this scene feel so much more serious, it puts so much bigger threat behind Suwa taking off his mask. It leaves you with a feeling of 'fuck, he lost a bit of control just by a human being close, if he was to take it completely off he would really lose all reason' While the anime just makes you feel 'oh he can control himself for a few moments after the mask is gone? That's good lol' It just minimizes the threat Suwa could pose when unmasked n seeps out so much tension out of that situation. Double especially when he just fucking takes it off at the end of the episode.

WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT LOSING CONTROL YOU STUPID FUCK (tho I did like him asking Takeuchi to teach him some songs, that was a nice addition.)

Anyway my last and least complaint cuz it was just kinda...funny

WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH AKESATO FALLING ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CONVERSATION??? THAT WAS SO FUNNY WHAT WAS THAT??? SHE JUST FALLS ASLEEP LIKE THAT SITTING UP, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CONVERSATION, EXACTLY AS HER PATRON IS STARTING TO YELL AT HER JKBBHJ???

Its so weird cuz in the manga we get this soft ass moment

Like jhbhjkbhj that's just a completely different vibe. I think this ending scene actually best shows off the vibe Suwa has in the manga. Gentle, caring, distant but affectionate. Compared to the anime where the similar scene almost ended up looking like a gag jnjkbkj idk man like the anime mostly has the same dialog, aside Suwa dunking on western influences which i enjoy, but the atmosphere is all over the place and it kinda feels too fast, idk. I dunno if I explained this well but here we are.

Part 2: Kurusu vs the vampire mob

[dumbass-mha-simp]

Hawks x Reader: Bad Idea

Another self indulgent Hawks fic that I've literally had in my notes for months. He lives in my head rent free along with my other 22 fake boyfriend's because I'm ✨mentally unstable.✨ It is a song fic tho, Bad Idea ft. Shiloh Dynasty https://youtu.be/kH9hJnT7KkE

Tw: food, depression, Hawks is honestly just feeling it bro- same dude,

Word count: almost 2k? I think

Requests are open! Honestly I'm probably terrible but the only things I can think to write are those imaginary situations I put myself in

(Y/L/N)- your last name

(Y/N)- your name

Thoughts or emphasized talk are in italics

Also idk why but I imagine he removes his feathers to shower since they probably need different cleaning conditions and also they just seem like a hassle in showers.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Here he was, the number two prohero. Everyone assumed his life was perfect, anything he wanted served on a gold platter. He felt the guilt creep up into him.

I should be thankful. The thoughts ate away at his mind in the rare seconds he got alone. You shouldn't be so selfish. So annoying. So insufferable.

Takami pushed these thoughts back. "No one needs to know how you think, Keigo." He whispers out to himself in his office.

He scrawled at paper work, trying to not let the self depreciating thoughts feast away on his mind. Unfortunately for him, different thoughts came up.

His best friend, Rumi had this friend. (Y/L/N). Smart, attractive, sometimes a little rough around the edges, but amazing. He found his mind wandering to them all too often.

They were mostly unknown, despite their insanely strong quirk. They preferred to stay out of the lime-light, through that irritable exterior sat overwhelming anxiety and shyness. But they always denied it.

He stopped himself as he realized he's spent 10 minutes only thinking of them, a friend. Yeah right.

He lazily walked out of the office waving to all his employees as he made his way outside. His eyes slowly dragged to the darkly faded blue sky, dusted in clouds. Cold, tired, aching. Just how he felt.

He took a slow brisk flight to his house, feeling the wind bash his face and the air flow through his feathers. He gently placed a foot on the metal railing of his balcony, taking a deep step to the ground and opening the door.

The emptiness rung through his apartment like a blaring siren. You have everything. How can you still want more?

The voices in his head screamed and clawed their way out. You're nobody. No one ever loved you. You're so alone. You're nothing but a tool to the commission. You're actual character is useless.

He shed his coat, boots, and pants. Looking to himself in the mirror as he removed most of his feathers. He looked exhausted as he stumbled into the shower, numbly.

The next ten minutes seemed to elude him when he wondered how much time has gone by of him staring at the shower wall blankly.

He dried off a bit then looked around his kitchen for something to eat. Have I eaten today? The buzz and light of his phone on the counter startled him.

"Hey, Hawks." A single, simple message from (Y/L/N). Okay don't panic.

"What's up?" He replied swiftly.

"I had this feeling something was wrong and wanted to check up on you."

"Why would you think that?" He tried to play it off like it wasn't true without actually lying.

"I'm not sure. Do you maybe wanna join me?" You asked.

"Where?"

"Well, every once in awhile when I need a break I go and stargaze with a night picnic. It helps me relax, and if you think it might help I'd want to. I can tell something's off." You were always so convincing. It felt like you weren't too nosy or snoopy but you understood.

"Text me where to be and when?" He let out a gentle smile at his phone.

"The dollar store on 4th in 10 minutes? So we can choose some snacks together?"

"I'll be there."

Did Takami think any problems where going to be solved with some food in the dark? No. But would he skip the opportunity to be with you, to find out how he really felt when it was just you two? Absolutely not.

He landed down on the broken pavement outside of the old dollar store, scanning around to see you.

"Boo!" A bump from behind had him flinching to see the sound as you stood behind him giggling. "Got ya."

"Very funny (Y/L/N) the most amazing trick yet." He rolled his eyes with a slight smile.

"C'mon let's go grab a bunch of terrible snacks and call it a picnic, bird brain."

You two walked into the store and walked a large circle around it, choosing chips and candy and drinks at your leisure. Once you got to the counter, he fights you to his wallet.

"It's my picnic."

"And I'm the very special guest who was so generously invited. I'm paying." He grins as you pout at him.

Grabbing the bags you placed them in the back seat as you offered passenger side to him.

"I don't like cars."

"Why not?"

"Cramps my wings."

You look at him with the biggest puppy eyes you can manage. "You already agreed to keep me company and pay for the snacks, let me do something for you?"

"Fine, but only cause you're pouting kid."

He gently sits in your passenger seat as you strap yourself in and turn the car on. The car hums and the music playing softly on the radio are the only things heard. The peace feeling too good to break.

Once you pull your car up into the parking lot of a small park and grab your bags, you begin leading him to your usual place.

"Hold these." You hand him the bags as you jump and climb up on top of a big metal container. You peer over the side with big eyes and a smile as you say to him, "now hand me the bags and do what I did!"

He looks at you with a wide smirk before simply flying up to join you. "Or you can do it the cheater's way." You pouted and bumped his shoulder.

"It's not cheating, it's using my resources." He says with a triumphant smirk.

"Your cheating resources." You pull out your gummy candies and started eating as you leaned back till you were laying down.

"Do you like the stars, Hawks?" You say like your sleep talking, staring into the night sky.

"Keigo." He shifts to lay down about a foot away from you. "You can call me, Keigo. And... I don't think I've ever taken time to look at the stars."

"No sneaking out away from parents to sit on vans and stargaze? Or watching the sunrise with a partner while eating fast food?"

"What kinda date is sitting in a car for hours staring at the sky and eating?" He laughs.

"Ah one that never really happened, he just said he would. But never mind that repressed shit." A sad laugh forces itself out as you stare between the stars.

"Was he cute?" He tried to sound funny but it came out more sympathetic.

"Sometimes," you laugh with him. "But he had really nice hands."

"Hands? That's an odd thing to find attractive." He turned his head over to look at you as your eyes seemed to burn holes in the dark milky blue sky.

He continued laughing with you about this guy but couldn't help an overwhelming feeling of jealousy. Who was he? Did he look anything like him? Was this recent?

"Keigo?" A voice snapped at his train or thought, "Yes, (Y/L/N)?" He replied rushed.

"Do you want your mini cookies?" You ask looking to him with the bag.

"Oh, yeah. Thanks." He mentions grabbing the bag from your finger tips.

He ate his cookies and thought as you seemed either lost in your head, or lost in the stars.

Loving you would be selfish. As such a high ranking hero, he's made a target for himself and anyone around him. He's broken down, can't feel. You obviously have other people on your mind. Someone like you wouldn't be single long.

"When did he leave?" He blurts out without thinking. Maybe it's a sore subject-

"Long ago." You look lost, your eyes searching and wandering but never grabbing hold of exactly where you should be. "Why?" Well I guess if I'm gonna start prying might as well go all the way.

"He thought that maybe he could love me. But now that's just ridiculous," you laugh coldly. "Who would love me?"

"Falling in love with you seems like a really bad idea. But not on your part." He whispers into the wind, hoping it'll carry his words away from you.

"What do you mean?" You look completely confused, almost scattered.

"You're quiet, and I'm someone who puts a spotlight on practically anyone around me. You'd constantly be put in danger. Plus I'm arrogant and cocky, nothing at all like you." He acted like he could see the stars as you could. He stared into them finding any way he could to avoid your eyes.

"You could get hurt or I could annoy you." He whispers.

"I had no idea you felt that way, Keigo." You whisper back, shock keeping your voice quiet.

His eyes burned holes into the night sky, he felt he shouldn't look at you. The mental image of you already wouldn't go away.

"You wanna know something, Keigo? I can read people like books, I can read stars like stories, and I can read in-between lines like they were in bold font. But, you always catch me off guard. Reading you is like a mystery novel. Sometimes intense, sometimes peaceful, but always keeping me wondering." You smile into the stars, you can tell he desperately doesn't want to see your eyes. "You're always leaving everyone on the edge of their seat, and when you leave you can't stop thinking of the next time you'll come. What you'll bring."

"I....I don't think I understand (Y/L/N)-" Keigo's soon cut off.

"(Y/N)"

"Well, (Y/N)- I don't think I understand." He tries to sit up and look at you.

"You catch me off guard, something about you speaks to me in ways I know you never actually would. I can see it, the way you stumble or hesitate. I can tell somethings scared you into silence." You've never had much chance to talk about the ways you analyze people, you wanted to tell him how you could tell the way he acted wasn't always good.

"I think you might be reading too much into this, kid." He tries to intervene.

"I get if you don't want to tell me." You stared up at the stars, waiting for him to do the same. "You see there?" You pointed to a star. "That's a constellation."

"They just look like stars." He seemed a bit disappointed that he couldn't see stars the way you did, with such knowledge and wonder in your eyes.

"That's cause they are," you giggled to him, "it's not like I can actually see the pictures either."

"You.. you can't?" He looked to you confused but slightly hopeful, how could they look at them but not see too?

"That's the whole point, Keigo. It's being able to see what's not really there. Sometimes I stare into the sky hoping to see any semblance of hope, but that's not how it is. You have to teach yourself to look at what could be there." He stared to you, a small content smile graced your face. You were beautiful.

"(Y/N)?"

"Yes?"

"Maybe, loving you isn't such a bad idea.." he looked remorseful, staring into the stars. Maybe he could see it too one day.

"What do you mean?" You glace to him.

"You see so much, you can read and see the things I want to see. I want to learn, (Y/N). I want to see how you do."

The smile on your face spread.

"I'd love to show you."

[happypeachwhispers]

Fries Meet Guys: ALEX HØGH ANDERSEN - I DIDN'T THINK I WAS A PERSON WHO SHOULD TALK ABOUT ANXIETY - Part Two: Performing, Friendship

Thank you for your patience, here’s the long awaited part two! Are you crying, cause I’m crying. He’s such a profound human being.

Taglist: @ivarsrideordie @tgrrose @shannygoatgruff @youbloodymadgenius @boltslightning @alexein13 @ivaraddict @jupiter-sagittarius

PART ONE HERE

PARTS THREE TO EIGHT

I was all over the place, like I always am, after all, and I enjoyed that experience a lot, it filled something inside of me. I always knew I needed something else. I sure was a pain in the ass for many people, but then I met a whole group of people just like me and I learned what acceptance means. What was percieved as “different” in my daily life became normal and I felt at home. I was certainly the most determined one, the first time at the Eventyrteatret I was the only one of 50 kids in the room who didn't live in Copenhagen and had to take a long trip to get there. It was so crazy and chaotic. It was so strange that they sang and danced, and then they all danced in sync into a song they prepared for the annual performance. Well, back then I thought it was weird, but a month went by and it became completely normal for me. “I'm one of you”.

It was a new experience. You suddenly started singing and dancing in Copenhagen, how was that recieved back at home in Skælskør?

I think it took some time for the people I used to hang out with to understand that. I have to say I may remember feeling a little bit out of place. But it also has to be said, I've always been pretty comfortable in school, honestly. I have never been the one who has been so unpopular or I have struggled extra hard, I think. So it was, maybe, a little bit difficult. It might have been hard for me not to be accepted anymore because I was accepted before. Their point of view wasn't the big challenge for me, I actually think it was more an internal challenge with myself, I could feel there was a completely different world. I didn't know anything about it but I just made room for myself and I discovered there was a part of me I had no idea was there in the first place.

Was it difficult to maintain frendships in school when you were busy driving back and forth between Skælskør and Copenhagen?

It has actually not been that bad in primary school. But I have to say in high school, yes, it was. I have some friends from high school I talk to every now and then, but no, I didn't maintain any close friendship. I basically lived a double life throughout high school, where I was either at the Eventyrteatret or I was shooting the advent calendar in Aalborg. So I was pretty much not there, my social life was in Copenhagen. I had a girlfriend there too. I just didn't feel the need for a social life in Skælskør. And the free time I had was pretty much all absorbed by my profession.

I think we can all relate.

Yes but usually Danish kids in high school when they have free time they wanna party, that's what happens when you're part of a group of friends in high school.

We have had some other guests in the studio who have had very different experiences. How is your situation friendship-wise in school at this point?

I had some friends in high school, in my class and in other classes, absolutely. But I spent almost all the time with the group of friends in Copenhagen, so I was not influenced by my high school mates and their choices that much. I've felt a lil bit different because I've had a double life. I mostly had different group of friends in relation to the activity I shared with them. The group of friends I acted with, the group I went to college with and then a small group I talk to from time to time mostly individually.

Do you have both female and male friends?

Yes, I do. I would say I have more male friends tho. It's a mixed bunch of ordinary people, both women and men.

Is the way you communicate with your female friends different from the way you communicate with your male friends?

Definitely. You have to be more of a listener, I'm pretty good at listening, I think you have to adapt and communicate in a different way based on who is in front of you. See, with men you talk a certain way, that sort of street style if you will.  It comes natural because that's the way you talk to each other since the first day you met. But when you have in front of you people who are pretty cool and you have to impress them, you just have to do this and that, and that's what it's needed. But I would like to be able to be honest, always. And it's not hard at all, I’ve been really good at surrounding myself with some really, really pleasant people. I can afford to be myself at all times and they can be one hundred percent themselves with me.

What does it mean to be your authentic self for you?

It means that one can afford to have not only a good day but also a bad one. To be able to be stupid and not have to be slaughtered for it. I can be weird and crazy and say some stupid things without having to go half an hour afterwards and hit myself in the head. These are little things that are so insanely hard to find. I'm very lucky. I can pretty much talk about everything with them, we are very very honest with each other. In January, I was in Tenerife with three of my friends, and we brought along our stories in the luggage. I was suffering from anxiety and I had a sore stomach, it lasted four months, I was finally getting better. Another friend of mine, he's extreme. The love game hits him immensely. The other one suffers from depression. He generally has a hard time figuring out what he wants and what he doesn't existentially. And then we have number four, thank God, he doesn't have the same big problems. He holds us all together. It was a great experience, I remember us four sitting around the table and talking while eating pizza with shrimps. We sat for three or four hours talking non-stop about nothing but our problems that one could imagine they are extremely taboo for other groups.

Did sharing with each other give you something on an emotional level?

Oh yes, absolutely. We support each other by sharing and it's awesome to have people you trust so much to share such personal issues with. And so I think in 2019 in today's Denmark, that's what it means to be a man. To be able to comprehend people and understand. I see instead a lot of carelessness and stereotypes.

Didn't you encounter those qualities in other men, as an adult?

No, not at all. It's not about stereotypes. We have just as many problems as everyone else and we are extremely worried about it financially and emotionally. Anxiety. Social education, existential issues. It can be anything. All my friends, all the people I have in my life, they all have problems to a greater or lesser degree. Absolutely. But that's what it means to be human. And that's what it means to be a man. It means you are making mistakes, you are imperfect. You are a fool, and you must be allowed to be a fool, and you will also stand on your own. You're going to hurt other people because you're human. But you must also be forgiven, and you must also be able to forgive. You just need care and understanding.

Were you able to find the care and understanding you need?

Alex groans – Yes and no.

Do I have to change subject?

Alex laughs – No, it's ok. I am open to recieve care. It's just that I stress a lot about my mistakes, your head plays games with you and you just have to survive.

You can't control everything you can handle, what a funny paradox. You describe yourself as a person who likes to take up a lot of space and fill a lot. And then I also sense that when it comes to emotions, for example, to take a seat and ask for help, then it's a whole different thing.

Yes, that's true. I don't know, I'm fucking complicated and I don't know how to handle it at all. I believe in nature and creativity. I have always had a lot of willpower and then I had my mother showing me the right path, then you grow up and learn to control yourself. But I have a hard time talking about it. I told you, I don't know. Yes, I am a human being who goes through a lot and thinks such extremely deep thoughts, I put all that in my creativity, in my work. That helps me. Then I have moments when I'm completely wrapped in my own thoughts, but I think, generally, I'm a relaxed person. I do my very best just not to do all that thinking and that takes a lot of effort. I won't let those thoughts get under my skin because I know all too well that it's not good for me.

END PART TWO

Ask me in messages if you wanna be tagged // Feel free to like, comment and share, thank you!

[crowdedimagines]

Who Is That? Part 2 (Harry Styles)

PART ONE

In the span of a week Harry and I go on two dates, our third taking place in a few hours. I’ve never moved so quickly with someone, but I’ve also never felt so comfortable with someone so quickly.

By the time I got up to my apartment I already had a text from Harry asking when he could see me again to take me out on a date. I immediately called Hannah to gush over what had happened. She seemed to be just as shocked as I was, especially being that I wasn’t exactly thrilled with him the last time she saw me.

Our first date, Harry took me out to eat. We only waited until the next day before we decided to meet up again. The more we got to talking the less we wanted to wait. Over dinner we were able to get to know each other a little better. Harry made me promise not to google him before the date. He found it refreshing to come across someone who didn’t know of his stardom. Instead he got to tell me all about it himself. I got to tease him about how this was the second time he was paying for my meal, but only our first date.

It took a while to meet up again, I officially started teaching. It took me a few days to get into the swing of things. In the meantime Harry and I texted and called to keep in touch.

Our second date was my idea. I decided it might be nice to go on a hike. I hadn’t been on any of the trails in Los Angeles in years, so I was glad to be back. Harry seemed to be thrilled with the idea as well. It was surprising how for someone who looks to be in shape, he becomes out of breath quite easily. We would talk the whole time, pausing to take in the view. Another successful date.

Hannah couldn’t help but freak out that things were going so well. She felt responsible since it was her idea for me to go up to him in the first place. She liked to gloat and tease me about giving a speech at our wedding. She also claimed that if she wasn’t godparent to at least one of our kids she would be pissed.

Tonight is Harry and I’s third date. He asked me when he dropped me off after our hike and he’s given me no details. We’ve talked and I ask him how to dress and what to bring, but he hasn’t budged on anything. Haven’t wavered even slightly on giving me some details.

“So, what are you wearing tonight?” Hannah asks, she watches me on facetime digging through my closet.

“I have no clue.” I huff, “I just don’t know what to expect. Like are we going out to dinner? Should I dress fancy? Or our last date was hiking so what if we’re like going rock climbing? I hate this.”

I sigh and lay back on my floor, piles of clothes around me.

“I may have heard from a little bird what you’re doing, so I would dress casual and cute.” Hannah admits, I can hear her laugh.

“You know what the date is?” I ask, sitting up to look at her proud smirk. She gives an evil nod in response. Of course they’re in cahoots.

“You ass! You’ve watched me sigh over my clothes for twenty minutes now. So what's the date?” I ask, picking up my phone from my desk to get a better look at the screen.

“I’m not telling! You will love it tho.”

“Okay, so casual and cute.” I reevaluate the items in my closet, trusting that she knows how I should dress appropriately. I settle on a short floral dress and a denim jacket. I put it on and turn back to Hannah for her opinion.

“It’s perfect!”

“Well that’s good because I think I just heard him at the door.” I reach for my phone and my purse, “Thanks!”

I yell a simple ‘coming’ so he knows that I heard him. I check myself in the mirror one more time by the door before deciding it’s good enough.

“Hi.” I swing open the door.

“Hello, love.” He leans in to press a kiss to my cheek. I smile leaning into his touch before turning around to lock my door behind me.

“Ready?” He asks, walking me towards the elevator.

“As ready as I can be for a mystery date.” I grin.

We go downstairs, Harry holds the passenger door open for me.

“I don’t get to drive?” I tease, sticking out my bottom lip in a pout.

“Not when you don’t know where we’re going.” He walks around to the other side and gets in. I’ve decided this car is my favorite when the top is down. It takes my hair with the wind, pulling it in every direction. I normally would hate that for going on a date, but it does the same thing to his curls.

We drive for a while and get on the freeway, telling me that we aren’t going anywhere very close.

“So, how was your first week?” Harry asks, referring to my first week with students.

“It was great. It was a long week, I’m glad it’s Friday, but it’s only confirmed that this is what I’ve always wanted to do. How about you, how was your week?”

I squint to look at him as I wait for an answer. The setting sun casting an orange haze over both our faces.

“I spent most of the week in the studio.” He glances over at me.

“Wait, but didn’t you tell me that you recently released an album?” I tuck my hair behind my ears.

“Yeah, I did. You can never spend too much time in the studio. Plus I was feelin a bit inspired.”

“Were you, now?” I tease, biting back a smile.

He simply nods, trying not to give in to many more words. He should know by now that I’m not going to let him off that easy.

“So, have you already written a song about me?”

He bites the inside of his cheek to avoid giving anything away. I don’t pull my eyes away from him, not wanting to miss an emotion that crosses his face. His cheeks heat up in the most adorable shade of pink.

“Wow.” I smirk, “If you keep that up, I’m going to become the narcissist in this relationship.”

“So we have a relationship now?” He decides to flip it on me now.

He’s successful in shutting me up for a minute. It’s true that we haven’t discussed exactly what we are. We are heavily flirty, but we haven’t even kissed, nothing more than the cheek at least.

“I must be pretty amazing then, huh?” I fill the void, bringing it back to me, wanting to know more about what he could be possibly writing about in the studio the past week.

“That’s where I have to agree.”

Silence fills the car, but it’s comfortable. We just listen to the radio, I watch the scenery pass by as we drive farther and farther from the city. I rest my arm on the top of the door, letting my hand float in the wind. Harry pulls me out of my trance when he reaches out to the radio.

“What?” I question as he turns down the radio. He has a funny look on his face as he does it.

“Nothing.” He shakes his head, “Just don’t always enjoy listening to my own music.”

“Shut up!” I grin, Harry has still been adamant about wanting to keep me in my little bubble of unawareness. He wanted us to find out things about each other organically so I haven’t been granted the pass to listen to his music yet, “This is meant to be.”

I reach to turn it back up again, letting it play loudly through the speakers. He rolls his eyes but a smile still graces his face, he gives up feigning annoyance. His arm resting across the bench of our chair drops to my shoulders to pull me a little closer. The wind was whipping my hair, but now due to his arm it’s settled. I lean in to rest my head against his shoulder, grateful for the small car. It makes the cuddling a little easier.

“So are you going to tell me where we’re going?” I ask, looking up at him.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

He continues down the freeway, the sky dimming as we go. We’re miles from the city, nothing is familiar anymore.

“Close your eyes.” He smiles.

“Why?” I squint sceptically.

“Because it’s more fun this way.” He manages to keep glancing between me and the road, “Humor me, love.”

“Fine.”

I squeeze my eyes shut and keep them shut, even as he slows. He makes several turns, we’re obviously far from the freeway now. The roads get quieter and quieter and eventually I can hear us turn on to a gravel road.

“I knew it, you are some creep.” I turn to face him, still keeping my eyes closed, “Taking me out into the middle of nowhere to kill me.”

“Shut up, would ya.” He nudges my shoulder, “You’re going to ruin the fun.”

I can hear the smile in his tone. He’s having way too much fun with this, but also it’s getting me excited for whatever he’s planned. It wouldn’t take much for him to win me over. He’s so charming, and we just click. I would be happy with picking up a pizza and talking. It doesn’t take much to fall for this boy.  

“Okay, you can open.” He’s finally parked. I picked up on outside noises of people talking and other cars.

I peek my eyes open to see where we’ve finally stopped. A drive in movie, Harry’s car parked a few rows back giving us the perfect view of the screen.

“Shut up.” I sit up, reluctantly leaving Harry’s grip so I can sit up a little more and look around.

“Harry.” I turn to look  at him, his eyes already on me, “This is perfect. Thank you.”

“C’mon, let’s go get some snacks.”

We walk over to the snack booth to get drinks and popcorn.

“I haven’t done one of these since I was a kid.” I laugh, taking a piece from the bag, “What movie are we seeing anyway?”

“Grease.” He grins, “A classic drive in movie.”

We go back to his car with our snacks just as the movie starts. The bench seating makes it so Harry can slide more to my side and avoid sitting under the steering wheel the whole time. Once we’re done snacking, we cuddle in a little more. Harry wraps his arm around my shoulder, I throw my legs over his lap. His free hand tracing patterns absentmindedly on my leg.

“I think I watched this movie a hundred times in year four.” He whispers into my hair.

“Really?” I grin thinking about ten year old Harry watching this movie on repeat.

“It was my favorite, I think I proper annoyed everyone else. Gemma hated me for it, I think she still hates this movie.”

I laugh pulling back to look at his smiling face. His eyes leave the screen once he notices I’m no longer watching.

“Whatcha starin at?” He teases.

“You.” I smirk, I focus my attention on his lips. He licks them once he notices my gaze. I tilt my head up towards his slightly, hinting. He smiles before leaning down to finally connect our lips. His hand leaves my leg to cup my cheek and deepen the kiss. I reach my hand to run through his curls, something I’ve been wanting to do since I saw him in the bar.

We both pull back to catch our breath after a few minutes of an intoxicating kiss. I peck his lips once more to get one last taste. Harry doesn’t seem to want it to be over either, pulling me close again. I laugh as he presses kisses down my jaw, trailing them down my chest. He trails them down between my breasts as far as the cut of my dress will allow.

“Harry.” I laugh, pulling on his hair lightly to grab his attention again.

“Hmm?” He finally pulls back to look at me again, he has a dopey grin. I’m still practically sitting in his lap, but I long to be closer. Needing to feel his lips burning against mine.

I push him down slowly, so his back is flat against the seat. I move to straddle his hips before I move down to join. I trace my hand along his jawline, letting the moment build this time. The tension is at an all time high, finally Harry loses patience and pulls me down to his lips again.

We continue the hot makeout for the rest of the movie. We manage to pry ourselves apart once Danny and Sandy are flying away in the car, the end of the movie. Harry clears his throat as he starts his car. I manage to stifle my laugh, Harry makes me feel like I’m a teenager again. Making out in a car, not wanting to go home just yet.

“How are we ever going to top this date?” I ask, my forehead resting against his neck. We’re just now pulling back on to the freeway, we’ve got a long way to go.

“I don’t really know.” He grins, “I’ve quite enjoyed this one.”

“I don’t want this night to end.” I reach my hand up to feel the breeze against it.

“It doesn’t have to.” His eyes flicker between me and the road, “My house is actually in Malibu. We practically have to drive right by it. We don’t have to! I didn’t mean to insinuate that we need to spend the night at my house.”

Harry being a proper gentleman, afraid he’s offended me. In reality it’s excited me.

“No, it sounds like fun.” I grin.

Harry continues driving, thankfully Malibu isn’t as far as driving all the way back into L.A. We both started non stop yawning about ten minutes ago, I think the tiring week and how late it is catches up with us. He enters the code to his gate and drives up the long driveway.

“Jesus, this is your house?” I laugh, looking around at his large Malibu home, “How’d you get this again?”

“Rockin and rollin and whatnot.” Harry laughs, putting on his best Danny Zuko impression to quote the movie. I throw my head back in laughter as he guides us to the front door, his hand resting on my lower back.

“You’re such a dork.” I whisper with a laugh.

“Oh really? I’m a dork? You seem to really like this dork.” He smirks, backing me into his house. I don’t even look around because I don’t want to break eye contact. Something about Harry’s eyes pull you in, enchanting you. Creating a wave of butterflies in my stomach.

“I do really like you.” I admit.

“Wow, she even said it without teasing.” He reaches forward to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear.

“I did.” I smile, “Believe it or not, I’m not always teasing you.”

“It’s okay if you were, surprisingly I like it when you tease me. You keep me on my toes.”

Harry shows me around slightly, a mini tour not going into it fully until we get to the master bedroom.

“Well this is my room.” He blushes, becoming his more shy side.

“It’s cute.” I smirk, “Do you have anything I could sleep in?”

“Yeah, of course.” He goes into his closet and comes back with a soft tee shirt and a pair of his boxers, “My bathrooms right through there.”

He gestures to the en suite. I go in to wash my face, brush my teeth with a spare toothbrush, and change. I decide the tee shirt is enough, it falls down far enough to feel comfortable. I fold my clothes and his boxers and leave them on the counter.

“You look way better in that than I do.” He admires from his bed, sitting up against his headboard.

“Tell me about it, stud.” I tease, throwing a Grease quote back at him. He lets out a loud laugh, not expecting the call back to the movie, little does he know I’ve been waiting to quote the movie since he did.

I walk over to his bed and pull back the covers to climb in, Harry sinks down next to me. I let out another loud yawn, Harry mimics it a second later. His warm arms wrap around my waist, pulling him closer to his side.

“Y/n?” Harry whispers after a few minutes of silence, checking to see if I’m still awake.

“Hmm?” I ask, struggling to keep my eyes open.

“Will you be my girlfriend?” His voice is just loud enough for me to hear it.

“Really?” I smile, turning around to see his face.

He nods, pressing a kiss to my temple.

“I get it if you think we’re moving too fast. If you don’t want the title that’s fine. I just want you to know that I’m not seeing anyone else, and I don’t want to pursue anyone else. I don’t want to play a game, I just want you.”

“I want you too, Harry.” I lightly trace my fingers over his jawline until I guide his face down to mine for a brief kiss.

“I would love to be your girlfriend.”

i hope you guys loved this part just as much as the first. xoxo

[italian-pastry]

Bnha Marriage Headcanons

KIRIBAKU

- KiriBaku got married first no I will not change my mind

-Baku wanted to get it done right after they graduated so 1, they can be married before they really get into hero work and risk death and 2, they can focus on their work since they married already

-the thing is; they had no celebration

-they just went to a courthouse one day and signed the papers and boom they're done

-(jirou and shinsou were the witnesses since they can keep secrets)

-and no-one really said anything about it

-Bakugou just said to Kiri after a date (while they were still third-years) and was like

- "Let's get married"

-and Kiri was so shocked he was just like "oh ok sure"

-bakugou did not appreciate that

-"WHO SAYS 'OK SURE' TO A PROPOSAL???"

-"THAT WAS BARELY A PROPOSAL KATSUKI YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A RING"

-they were married for 12+ years before they had a ceremony

-it was pretty epic ngl

-lots of red and gold and dragon-esque imagery because that stuff is rad

-wedding armour? I say yes

-bakugou threw the bouquet straight into Deku's face

-"KACCHAN I'M ALREADY MARRIED"

-"I DON'T GIVE A FUUUUUUUUUCK"

-Eijirou and Katsuki hyphenated their last names (when they signed the papers after they graduated)

- Mr. And Mr. Bakugou-Kirishima

-Their kids got to be involved! It was great

TODODEKU

-they actually waited a bit after they graduated and got their careers in order to get married (like responsible adults)

-they waited a year or two

-Izuku proposed (Shouto cried)

-the wedding was suprisingly extra for an anxious broccoli and bitchy peppermint

-lots of silver and stars

-Inko would've gotten into a fist-fight with Shouto if he didn't let her help pay for anything

-and said fight almost happened

-they ended up compromising and she helped pay for Izuku's suit

-All Might mostly happy-cried the entire time (he was Izuku's best man)

-endeavor? Whose he? We don't know him. He don't get to show. This is an Emdeavor-free zone

-Shouto started crying during the vows, and his best man (Bakugou) had to read them for him

-it was funny

-since the #1 pro hero was getting married, it was a huge deal for the media

-think the royal wedding levels of huge

-the wedding was just for family and friends tho

-so the paparazzi can suck it

-Shouto took Izuku's last name (because SCREW Endeavor)

TSUYURAKA

- Tsu proposed a week or two after the TodoDeku wedding

-She'd been planning it for months her friends' wedding just so happen to have occured beforehand

-they were very efficient about planning the wedding tho so they were only engaged for like a few months (3-4)

-the wedding was magical

-nature Flowers FROGS

-you can bet your ass it was Princess and the Frog themed

-"they put chemicals in the water that turned the freaking frogs gay"

-they decided to not take each others' last names they just vibed with their own

-Urarake was DEFINITELY a bridezilla

-but like

-a badass bridezilla

-but she turned into a marshmallow during the actual ceremony

-she did better than Shouto tho

-she was able to actually say her vows

-the whole thing was super sweet

-the reception tho

-the reception was lit

-they totally had a preplanned first dance as wives

-and it was awesome

-Momo caught the bouquet

-Lesbian Luck if I may

-it was the ultimate Gal Pal ceremony

SHINKAMISERO

-it was an amazing mess from the beginning

-Sero proposed to his boyfs on their dating anneversary

-but it turns out

-Shinsou had the same exact idea

-(Kami hadn't really thought of it)

-so that was pretty fun for Kami, being proposed to by both of his boyfriends that day

-They got married before TodoDeku, but they weren't the first (not counting Kiribaku)

-Sero was just happy to be getting married, so he wasn't much help during planning

-Kaminari was the control-freak, surprisingly

-he just really wanted to have an amazing wedding don't judge this poor hopeless romantic

-shinsou just asked questions like "so when the priest guy says 'you may now kiss the grooms' how are we gonna kiss? There's three of us"

-Shinsou also almost forgot to get a suit

-he only got his suit like 2 weeks before the wedding date

-dont tell Kami, but the wedding was low-key kinda basic

-(oh except for the fireworks)

-but it was still amazing

-Eri was the flower girl and ring bearer

-I know she's like 11 at this point but hush she deserves this

-there were little pikachu cookies at the reception

-they were a hit

-since this is a poly wedding there were some complications

-there were 3 first dances as husbands

-3 sets of groomsmen (do they even have that many friends among the 3 of them?)

-there were some roadbumps

-but did they care?

-no

-they all joined the Sero club and were just happy to be married

-they decided to be ~unique~ and they made an amalgamation of their last names

- Shin-ar-o (Shin from Hitoshi, Ar from Denki, O from Hanta)

-So they all have the last name Shinaro now

-their first kid was born 9 months after their honeymoon

-sooooo 👀

AOMINA

-Second to be married with a ceremony (Mina was almost disappointed)

-Mina proposed since Aoyama is mr. No balls

-he did buy her a ring that matched his engagement ring

-the wedding itself was very extra

-mina almost got cancelled because "her dress was sparklier than her husband"

-theme? No. Just sparkle

-Aoyama had really long vows that was generously seasoned with healthy doses of French

-Mina expected this and so her vows were pretty short

-Their reception was wild

-no children allowed

-it was an epic rave and they had a pretty fantastic time

-Mina and Aoyama actually spent a crap load of time planning the wedding

-they were fiances for almost 8 months

-since Aoyama is a low-key attention slut, the media was allowed to be involved

-(mostly everyone else with their weddings didn't really want the media to be involved)

-so they did a lot of interviews about the planning process and who they were hiring and who was involved and the whole shebang

-they legit had fun with it

-legally, Mina took Yuuga's last name, but everyone still uses Ashido (she wanted them to)

-Yuuga got drunk at the reception and proceeded to cry the rest of the night and ramble about how happy he was

-(Mina also got drunk but instead she danced on a table then proceed to pass out)

HAGOJIROU

-they were the first to be married with a ceremony

-Ojirou proposed a few months after they graduated

-there were many botched proposal attempts before that

-but it worked out in the end

-PASTEL WEDDING PASTEL WEDDING

-Hagakure's dress made her look like a cupcake it was pretty fantastic

-Ojirou said 'Naw' to a black suit so he really rolled up in a baby blue suit

-slay king

-there was tons of cloud/sky imagery since that sounds super cute

-since Hagakure's dress was so poofy, she had a black swan moment during the reception and changed into a black dress more suited for dancing and general partying

-although they were the first wedding, they still had the biggest cake, to this day

-surprisingly, neither of them cried during the vows

-Ojirou did get pretty misty-eyed tho

-Hagakure will say she didn't cry but it's not like anyone can prove her wrong

-Tooru took Mashirao's last name

-Tooru Ojirou <3

-(Tooru was already pregnant when they got engaged but shhhhh don't tell nobody)

MOMOJIROU

-GAL PALS GAL PALS GAL PALS GAL PALS

-they were one of the last to get married in the first group (like, there was a large group of people who all got engaged at once, and Momojirou was one of the last ones)

-Momo proposed but you know what that means

-the most extra engagement ring ever

-it was black and purple and amazing

-Jirou was a tad overwhelmed by it (but she still loves it)

-She has a plainer ring she wears out and about, she only wears the super fancy one during events

-VICTORIAN WEDDING LET'S GOOOO

-it was also space themed and super pretty

-not nearly the most extra wedding, but certainly quite extra

-Jirou cried a lot

-Momo did a lot of pleased smiling

-it was real sweet

-their reception was elegant and amazing

-their first dance was AMAZING and heartwarming and just real sweet

-Momo just wanted to keep becoming more extra and more extra and even MORE extra

-Jirou had to reign her in a lot

-the venue and catering and all that stuff was lovely and expensive

-(which almost gave Jirou a stroke)

-Momo just wanted the best for her gal pal

-btw the gal pal joke was carried through the whole wedding

-it even said it on the invite

-"You have been formally invited to the Gal Pal wedding of Kyouka Jirou and Momo Yaoyarozu"

-Jirou took on the Yaoyarozu last name because idk she felt like it

[nuclear-satan]

Final Space Season 3 Episode 1 Review **SPOILER WARNING!!**

...And Into The Fire we go!

I really have wanted to do a Final Space review for a while, so now - I'm going to do it, fuck it. Starting a couple episodes late, but after [insert shenanigans] I needed to let it cool off before getting back into it.

One last warning: THESE ARE NOT SPOILER FREE REVIEWS. DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE NOT SPOILED AND DO NOT WANT TO BE. THESE ARE GOING TO HAVE SOME SUMMARIZATION INVOLVED.

With the disclaimer out of the way, let's get into it.

So, first of all, I have to acknowledge that this cold open? Fucking toasty. The entire first five or six minutes of this episode is flat out amazing and some of the best that Final Space is. Really intense - I love the dramatic cold open to a space chase.

Also, however, brief, the Quinnary reunion was nice. Quinnary is a ship that I enjoy subjectively more than objectively, but considering it really hits now even if S1 had issues... I can look past it yo.

Invictus proves his power and intimidation incredibly well this episode, between the Gary Zombies and even this first incredibly terrifying matchup - even Mooncake, who in any other situation has been able to zap it away, couldn't touch it. Really setting the villain well.

Small thing I want to acknowledge because there was some discourse on it -- Sheryl saying "I'm his mother; where do you think he got it from?" Was really nice to me. Obviously not all is forgiven, nor should it be, but it's just a nice bit of character development.

Then, Ava gets Yeeted by Bolo and breaks.

I could have taken a better screencap probably, but I will not.

Anyways, considering the cast of characters was way too fucking big in S2, I'm not... particularly aggrieved by this, especially since I didn't really like AVA anyways, but it is pretty unfortunate that one of the only female characters just got the ax without basically any development other than the obligatory robot comphet stuff. Whatever, I think this is setting the stage for HUE AI, so I'll bite my tongue.

That said, the conversation that HUE and AVA had before she died? Sweet.

And then they're in Final Space. Goddamn, they really went the extra mile animating and illustrating this episode. Gotta acknowledge it.

Also, quick note: New OP is a banger.

...And this is when the review's going to start getting a bit more negative, because we jump straight into everyone's favorite trope: a time skip.

I. I really have issues with this timeskip. This episode was fucking ballistic in the pacing, and I really, really wish that I could have spent some more time within Final Space just trying to survive. I get it. It was a premiere, so you wanted to go all out, but... I really wish we could have savored it. There's just suddenly a timeskip! We don't get to see how they've been surviving. We don't get to see shit. Quinn just suddenly appears in a new outfit, and then we're off the races.

I dunno man, I really had issues with the pacing of this episode, and this is the backbone of it. It's okay to take a breather, even in your opening episode. You have to know when to take a breather. This episode sorely needed it, and it didn't get it.

Also, obligatory Danger Groins mention. Yeah, I know that's not what he says. It's what he says in my heart, tho.

From here, the Gary zombies show up, which are... admittedly intimidating.

They get attacked, and - okay, can we fucking mention the titan fights for a moment? No matter what happens this season, I'm here for this. This is Gurren Lagann levels of ridiculous, and I fucking love it. Smash that planet, yo.

lThey get separated, and Avocato and Gary have a bit unfitting but fucking hilarious moment that has to be acknowledged. This shit ain't straight, yo. There's no fucking way you tell me this shit is straight.

And... *sigh* I really have some goddamn issues with the next... I don't know, I wasn't watching, six minutes?

"There's no more grossout scenes," we were told. "Season 2 gross out is done. No more weird fetishes."

Okay.

Okay, sure.

I'm sparing you the images, because I don't want to post grossout on my blog, but... holy shit, Quatronostro's birth scene. First of all, which of the fuckers on the blog keeps putting their fetishes in this show? Clarence is gone, so you're making Mpreg Tribore (I realize Tribore is canonically genderfluid, but he's male presenting at the time of this birth... and at every time... I don't have faith in two cishet men to actually make good on that, sorry. I hope I'm wrong.) Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

The scene is gross, uncomfortable grossout. This isn't the 90s anymore!

Also, the other thing I have to acknowledge - that motherfucking robot. It's season 3 - haven't we moved past the screaming = funny leftover humor from Olan's YouTube days? Clearly fucking not.

Also, Ash did a really out of character thing this episode by shooting the robot. I... what is Ash's character, exactly? Ash is an inconsistent enigma. Someone define that poor girl's character, already.

After that... mess.... though, we do end up with a very solid ending. Bolo headbutts the planet, Quinn and Gary get swept up in the blast, and we end up with a very beautiful but quick scene of Gary and Quinn embracing one last time - it's very reminiscent of chapter 9, and I did thoroughly enjoy it.

iAlso, the shot of Mooncake saying "Gar" while looking for Gary, presuming he's dead? Oh, that just hurts.

And then we end with HUE saying, "We are alone, Gary." Honestly, genuinely was a little disappointed to find it wasn't just HUE and Gary. I thought this line was going to come later in the season, and it was just going to be HUE and Gary in a callback from season one. It wasn't, and I'm genuinely very disappointed as someone who's favorite dynamic in the entire show is S1 HUE and Gary. Of course, as a result, I'm not unbiased, and... well, I do stan Quinn too.

And goddamn, look at the Earth. She got fucked uuuuuup. I think I remember hearing next episode that there's only one survivor left, which I do NOT buy as a concept, but it's very cool to see a show that does not shy away from full apocalypse scale destruction of the earth. It like, never happens, so it's a nice subversion. Get fucked, earth.

Overall Thoughts:

This episode is the definition of a mixed bag. The beginning is fantastic and the ending is solid (even if personally disappointing), but the middle is genuinely kind of bad. The pacing is rough, there's season 2 tier grossout that I did NOT need to see, and that robot deserved a punt in the face.

The animation is fantastic though. Everyone point and stare at the animation.

I still think the good outweighed the bad, though - if only because of my personal attachment to the characters. I think this was a decent episode - probably on par with the other openers... actually, I don't know.

My disappointment with this episode was more than with the Toro Regatta, but that was more due to my own expectations and thus not fair to rank it that way. I don't know - all the first episodes of the seasons are meh at best, and this unfortunately due to the lackluster middle fit that mold as well.

If you asked me to give it a ranking, I'd probably say if we assume a 5 out of 10 is average, I'd give it a 6. Decent, fantastic when it's good, but the entire middle section really brought me out of it and because of that I can't give it anything more than that.

I've heard episodes two and three are good, though - excited to see the Ventrexian for myself after all the fuss, so let's see how it holds up!

I'm scared for Biskit tho.

[twilight-hogwarts]

Friends at last

AN: We all know James and Lily got together on their 7th year but I feel like they would have became friends before that and in my head James would have mature a lot during the summer before their 6th year when Sirius went to live with the Potters because that was when the reality of the imminent war against Voldemort finally hit him hard. So here is how I think Lily and James finally became friends. (I might continue this.)

 Lily`s 6th year at Hogwarts have been quite different from the last five. She used to spend a lot of her free time in the library or on the grounds with Severus but now that she wasn’t friends with him anymore she started to hang out in the Gryffindor common room and was constantly with her house friends. She was always been especially close to Marlene McKinnon and Dorcas Meadowes, but now she was also spending more time with Alice Westenberg and Mary Longbottom too. Lily was always fond of the two others girls who shared their dorm and was happy to have became closer to them.

The only down side to it was that spending more time with them in common room meant to spend more time with the boys from Gryffindor`s 6th year. After all they were all good friend. Marlene and Dorcas seem to always hang out with the four pranksters. But Lily soon found out that being around them wasn’t as bad as she tought.

She never minded being around Remus, she has always considered him a friend and the most mature one in the group. Since they both became prefects, the year before, they grown even closer and were now really good friends. So she was glad to spend more time with him and at first she thought that whenever the boys were around she`d just talk to Remus and ignored the rest of them, but soon she realize that would not be possible and that it wasn’t exactly a bad thing.

She also never minded Peter much, he was a shy boy that laughed and admired everything the others boys did, he had always been nice to her, and very soon she found herself helping Peter with his charms homework and actually laughing with him about something Sirius had said.

What really surprised when she started liking Sirius. At first she really tried to keep a safe distance but since she was spending more time with Remus that automatically meant more time around Sirius, who she always tought that he was James` shadow when in fact he never seemed to live Remus by himself.

For her, James and Sirius has always been worse than the other two, she knew they were the minds behind the pranks and the adventures of rule breaking. She also hated the fact that they were excellent students, even tho they were constantly disturbing classes with their funny remarks and pratical jokes, somehow everyone seemed admired them, even the teachers loved them, no matter how many detentions they got, James and Sirius had the entire school at their feet. But soon she realized they weren’t that bad. She didn’t know if it was because she never spent that much time around them or if something had changed but she found herself laughing at their jokes and not minding at all being around them. Lily did not loved Sirius and James as much as the rest of the school, but now she finally understood what their appeal was and why such nice boys like Remus and Peter were friends with them.

She came to that realization on a late Wednesday night in the end of September, all the sixth years were siting close together in the common room doing their large amount of homework in silence, when Remus suddenly closed his heavy book of Advanced Transfiguration and said “I give up” under his breath, Sirius immediately started saying it was the end of the times in a loud voice like he was a minister on a Sunday service, James followed suit and got on his knees screaming “hallelujah”, soon everyone was laughing, even a couple of seventh years who were sitting in the other end of the room. But instead of continuing the joke like Lily thought he would, James stood up to sit beside Remus to help him out with his late essay for Mcgonagall, since he had lost a couple of important classes that week because he was “sick”.

That was something that Lily started noticing: the way Sirius, James and Peter treated Remus, and it made her change the way she saw the boys. She knew about Remus secret, she knew why he was always getting sick, missing classes sometimes and almost sleep walking for a couple of days after a full moon. She had never openly talked about it with him but she had a hunch that he knew she knew since she was constantly covering for him on prefects duties. She had notice in the pasts years how the boys would visit him in the hospital wing and get his homework for him but she never really notice how very protective they were of Remus, how whenever he was looking a bit miserable they would find a way to make him laugh, how Sirius and Peter was always handing him chocolate and how he seemed to accept it without even noticing. How Sirius, just the day before, when Remus came back from the hospital wing, let him fall asleep on his shoulder,  and how James, sitting on the other side of the sleeping boy, took his hand to Remus’ forehead to measure his temperature and took of his robe to cover his sleeping friend with it. In all fairness she had also seen them piling up objects on top of a sleeping Remus a couple of time, but they seem to had a understanding on when not to do it.

Lily started noticing little things like that as if to justify to herself why she didn’t mind being around them anymore. So she notice the little things, she notice when James during the first week of term helped a group of first years to find their way to class (although Lily only payed attention in case James was giving them a wrong direction as a joke), she saw when James stopped two second years from dueling in the middle of the entrance hall, she saw when Severus called Remus a bad name and was surprised to see James telling them to ignore him only to see Sirius losing his patience and hexing Snape and finally she notice how James hasn’t ask her out once that year. He had of course flirted with her, but after seeing him winking and saying “thank you, gorgeous” to Alice as she passed him the mashed potatoes and later in class seeing him blowing a kiss at Mcgonagall after she congratulated him on his perfect transfiguration of a rock into a pillow, she realized that was how he talked with every women. Actually flirting with Mcgonagall seemed to be a inner competition between him and Sirius, although Black had more practice since he always flirted with all the other teachers trying to come out of detentions (something that, according to James, made him lost point with Mcgonagall for cheating on her). So after a few weeks Lily started to relax around them just enough to stop hating him and Sirius, and eve laugh a bit of their jokes.

In mid October Lily finally gave in and fully admitted to herself that she actually liked Sirius. They started talking a lot about muggle music, after he saw her with a t-shirt from a band he liked, then they started talking muggle books, movies and Lily was very surprised to see  that he knew so much about the muggle world. Eventually their conversations grew into more deep meaningful stuff. They would talk about politics, Voldemort and the imminent war, James and Remus were also very passionate and opinionated about that and had similar views to Lily’s (she also notice they were not afraid to say Voldermort`s name), but Sirius was by far the most opinionated about the subject and seemed ready to fight anyone who said anything remotely unpleasant  about muggle borns.

After some time they started talking about families and shared their complicated relationship with their siblings, Lily was a bit surprised to found out that Sirius had left his parents house, and was know living with the Potters, because of his family sympathy toward Voldemort. She knew Sirius was quite different from the rest of his pure blood family but never imagined he would go to such lengths. That made her admire him a bit and she was now happy to call Sirius Black her friend.

James was the last one she warm up to. She would talk to him, laugh of a few of his jokes and he had even helped her with a particular hard transfiguration homework but she would still keep some distance in a way to guarantee that he wouldn’t ask her out. Finally in the end of November, on a full moon, something happened that made it impossible for them not to be friends. Lily was laying in the sofa close to the fire reading a novel all by herself very late at night, almost early morning, on a Friday when the Fat Lady portrait opened up and James being support by Peter stumbled over the hole with his left arm bleeding and his shirt cut open from his shoulder blades to the wrist. Lily stood up immediately and asked:

“Oh my God!! What happened??”

The two boys did not notice she was there and were surprised to see someone awake in the communal room at that time of night.

“Err” Peter looked at James who lost the little bit of color he still had on his face.

“Sleepwalking” said James “I was sleep walking and Peter came to recue me.”

“Exactly” confirmed Peter “woke up for a bit of water and saw James crossing the grounds thru my window so-” but he looked at James and the face his friend was giving him made him stop talking.

“What happens to you arm?” Asked Lily

“I got hurt.”

“I can see that.” She said rising her eyebrows. “How?”

James seemed to be having a hard time finding the right words. So he surprised himself when he told her the truth.

“The Whomping Willow. Got to close to it and never saw it coming.”

“You should go to the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey will sort you out in a second” the girl suggested.

“No” the two boys said together a bit to fast.

“I can’t.” said Potter “I don’t want to lose anymore point or get another detention. Please don`t give us in. It’s just a small cut I’ll sort it out myself.” He looked at her with pleasing eyes.

“Have you looked at your arm? It looks pretty bad. You need more than a band aid.” She said still debating with she should insist on taking him to the hospital wing.

“I’ll be fine. Just don’t say anything. Please, Evans?”

“I won’t. I promise.” Lily wasn’t sure why she agreed to that so fast and suddenly remembered what day of the month it was and regretted making that promise. “Are you sure you don’t want to go to Madam Pomfrey? You don’t want that getting infected.”

“I’ll be fine.” Said James and they started walking towards the stairs to their dorm but Lily suddenly moved to get in the way.

“Wait a second. I have something that might help. Sit down and wait here.” she ran up stairs to get her medicinal potions kit thinking it was a really great idea to do the extra medicinal potions class with Madam Pomfrey like Professor Slughorn had suggested. When she came down James was sitting on the sofa with his eyes closed and Peter beside him looking at his bleeding arm. She sat in front of them on the coffee table.

“Let me had a look. I’m no healer but I happen to know how to bread Madam Pomfrey healing potion. It will help with the pain, it will heal faster and avoid an infection. That’s the best I can do.” She said while examining his arm.

James looked at her like she had grow a second head. He had been avoiding being a prick with Lily like Remus told him and they have been spending time around each other without her wanting to hex his head off, but they were not exactly friends. Actually, James didn’t said anything to anyone but now he was a bit frustrated that Lily seemed to became good friends with everyone but him. So he was a bit surprised that she was so promptly to help him.

“But, with you want me to help we have to find a empty classroom.” she continued pretending not to notice his shock.

Lily and Peter helped him up and the three of them reached a classroom in the end of the hallway, Lily made him sit down on a table and started sorting out the ingredients.

“You can go back to bed Peter.” said James. “Let Remus and Sirius know where I am in case they wake up.” he gave  a meaningful look to his friend.

“Yeah. I’ll let them know.”And slowly backed away to the door.

Lily ignored that and continued to prepare the potion without looking at their direction. She knew Remus was not sleeping in the Gryffindor tower tonight.

After Peter closed the door James looked intensely to Lily observing the girl work her way thru the potion. They kept silence for a while, but after some time Lily found his staring a bit too distracting and she finally asked “Lost something, Potter?”

“Sorry.” James looked down with a tiny smile. “I’m just trying to understand why are you helping me.”

She gave him a half smile. “You rather I let you bleed to death? That can be arranged.” She looked at him and without waiting for an answer she said. “Excuse me, I have to clean you wound and I’ll need cut shirt to clean the wound.”

“Oh right. Let me just...” James moved on the table he was sitting and cringing he slowly removed his shirt trying not to touch or move his left arm that much. “I think it’s just better to take it off because I think it got a bit of my neck too.”

He moved to show his back to Lily and she saw there were three gashes, one that went from the base of the back of his neck to the tip of his shoulder, the other close to his elbow and a very deep one on his forearm. For Lily despair she noticed that they looked like animal scratches.

“James” Lily took a deep breath “are you sure this was made by the tree right? That wasn’t an animal or anything like that?”

“What? No, no, it wasn’t an animal.”

“Because if it was an animal you have to tell me. Because with we use the wrong potion it will be worse.” Lily looked right into James eyes trying to pass him the seriousness of the situation.

“I promise you, Evans, it was not an animal.” He looked back at her eyes trying to show her that he was telling the truth. He tought he had memorized every detail of Lily`s face by that point but by looking into her eyes he noticed how intensely green her eyes were.

“Okay.” She turned her attention to the wounds and his arm.

They didn’t say anything for some time. But Lily’s curiosity took the best of her.

“Where were you tonight?” She asked.

“I.. hmm I was sleeping walking… like a said. Woke up with that freaking tree throwing me to the ground.” But she noticed how when he said that he looked down to his lap.

“Fine. You don’t need to tell me the truth. But if you were putting yourself in danger by trying to be a good friend please don’t do that again.”

He looked up at her. They looked at each other for a few seconds and Lily wanting to make sure he was receiving the message completed said: “Imagine how Remus would few if he hurt you.” With that James confirmed his suspicions: Lily knew about Remus.

“You know.” he said, it was not a question.

“I know.” Lily confirmed

“How? When? Does he know you know?”

“We never openly talked about it but I think he knows I know.”

“How? Since When?” Repeated James.

“I had my suspicions since our third year. But I was only sure about it last year when I could no longer ignore the facts.”

“Snape told you?”

“What? No! Severus knows? How?”

“He saw it, long story, but Dumbledore made him promise not to tell anyone.” James said.

“He never said anything to me. That was one of the reasons I never gave my suspicions a second tought, didn’t want to feed Sev’s obsession. But after spending so much time together during prefects duties it was impossible to ignore so I figured I was right and started covering up for him.” Lily explained.

“You don`t mind?” Lily looked confused so he continued “that he’s a...”

“No” Lily cut him off, sounding a bit offended “I like people for their character not for their blood status.”

“I didn’t mean... of course not. I just... I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that” James looked down a bit ashamed for being so surprise that Lily would be okay with it.

“It’s okay. It’s just... I always liked Remus, he has always been a friend and I’m a muggle born so I don’t really understand where wizards prejudice against werewolves comes from. It’s not like anyone would choose that.” She started to clean his wound. “Let me clean that while we wait for the potion to chill.” She finished cleaning his arm in silence put the dirty cottons aside, turned on her back to lean into the table James was sitting. “So how long have you know?” James hesitated, Lily felt like she had cross over some line but wasn’t sure how. “Sorry you don’t need to answer that.”

“It’s not that.” James said. “It’s just weird to talk about it with anyone outside our bubble.”

“I get it you don’t need to say anything. Look I think the potion it’s fine now, it won’t burn your arm.” Lily said putting her finger on the caldron and started applying the potion on his injured arm, making him flinch a bit.

“We’ve known since our first year. It’s impossible not to notice certain things when you share a dorm. Remus was so relieved when we told him we knew and did not care about it.” He took a deep breath and continued. “We just want to make things easier for him. We are not putting ourselves in danger. We just like to be there when it’s over, give him company until Madam Pomfrey comes to collect him.” He finished and actually felt relieved to have told her the truth. Lily was looking at him like she had never seen his face before. He misunderstood the look. “Please, Evans, don’t tell anyone that. I promise we are not in danger. We just want Remus to see some familiar faces when all is over. Please, Lily, don’t tell anyone.” The despair on the boy face was such that Lily, who had a lot of questions about the logistics of the whole thing nodded and said “Don’t worry. I won’t say a thing. Like I said, I like Remus.” She said with the last part with a smile. “Just promise me the worst that can happen is being attacked by the Whomping Willow”

“I promise” James said but Lily notice he looked down to his lap when he said that.

They sat quiet for a moment, Lily applying the potion carefully on his arm, then James remembered something. “I haven`t thank you.” He said. “Oh… don`t worry about that-“ Lily tried to say but James cut her off. “Thank you, Evans. Truly, I appreciate it more than you know.” He finish and noticed she had gone a lovely shade of pink.

He also figured that, since her was alone with her and that did not happen very often, it was the perfect moment to do something Remus told him to do weeks ago. “Also, I believe I owe you an apologize.” James said making Lily look quite confused.

“What for? May I ask?”

“Well, mainly for being a prick to you. It has been brought to my attention that the way I handled my crush on you wasn`t the most chivalries.” He said with an ironic smile. “In my defense I was stupid and was trying to make you notice me in any way I could. Anyway… I am sorry and I won`t treat like that again.” Lily had stopped working on his arm and was looking at him like he had grown a second head. “What is it? What`s wrong?”He asked when he saw the look on her face.

“Nothing. I… just… Well, I`m impressed.” She said and with a smile on her face she continued. “I mean, James Potter apologizing… Wow… That`s not something you see very often.” Lily gave a small chuckle.

“Oh shut up, Evans.” He said smiling and chuckled along with her.

“No, but seriously, why are you apologizing? What...” She stopped talking not knowing how to ask that in a nice way.

“What made me grow out of my big head?” He continued her question for her, smiling. “Well, mostly, Remus. But I`m not really sure what made me finally listen to him.”

“Remind me of thanking him sometime.” Lily said. “Jokes aside, I noticed you matured a lot since last term, and I don`t mean just the whole harassing me thing.”

“Harassing is a really strong word…” James said timidly.

“You know what I mean. Anyway, you haven`t been bullying anyone just for fun anymore and I swear I saw you telling off a couple of first years for trying dueling each other. In all I`m just really glad that I can be around you without wanting to hex your head off.” She finished.

“I`m very glad about that too.” James said smiling. “And I really am sorry for the harassing thing.”

“No worries, Potter.” Said Lily while wrapping his arm on bandages.

“So… Friends?” He asked with a shy crooked smile.

“Friends.” She confirmed, finishing wrapping his arm and standing a hand to shake his.