#it's all well and good to hear someone say you've saved them

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

imagine Charlie getting over the initial Oooh Wings~ and Yay We're Okay Again! only to find out HOW Vaggie got her wings

out of her love for Charlie, yes sure, very sweet, Vaggie would probably say it with so much softness and pride, how her wings are physical declaration of what Charlie means to her and-

Vaggie got those wings while they were separated. it happened when Charlie wasn't there for her

like on that fucking rooftop

it's one sided AGAIN. it's Vaggie doing her emotional battles ALONE, or at least, facing them without Charlie physically there with her

three YEARS they've known each other. Dating for... long enough to be comfortable. presumably it's close to three years of Vaggie running to hold Charlie like we see her doing over and over- in the first ep after the extermination, during the reveal in heaven, before the battle when Charlie was scared-

three years. and Vaggie's wings only come back when they aren't together

add that to Charlie's habit of apologizing whenever Vaggie finds her being sad- imagine it's because, Vaggie never let's Charlie help her when she's sad.

Vaggie doesn't hide it. but she does that thing, like on the roof. Asking Charlie to leave her here. Sad and hurt and mentally not doing good. Asking for alone time (she's charlie's armor) (what's the point of her if she can't help-)

and Charlie backed off from that. respected it. was scared of what it meant? scared to find out?

she wasn't too worried though, like this whole thing was familiar. Vaggie needs alone time and Vaggie will come back. and she does

after the reveal though, part of Charlie's anger comes from fear- that if Vaggie was lying about the angel thing, what about everything else? what about her love and faith in Charlie? does Vaggie really love her? Charlie shared EVERYTHING with her but Vaggie had this secret only it's not just ONE secret is it- it's not just ONE thing Vaggie won't share- it's just a sign of how much Vaggie HASN'T been sharing- even when it's scary and sad and, she really needs a hug

what if Charlie really really REALLY wants to be THERE for Vaggie, but the wings are a reminder now of Charlie not being there when Vaggie got back this important part of herself

(of vaggie finding herself in the alone time, without charlie)

(worse- carmilla was there. someone else was there when charlie wasn't and that person was who vaggie needed-)

irony irony irony

every time Vaggie is alone trying to figure out herself and what to do and if she can do it- Charlie's the first and most important thing her mind holds onto. Charlie, and wanting to be WITH Charlie, is always what gets her to face her problem and keep pushing through

she just... doesn't do it while Charlie's actually there. and maybe she doesn't talk about it much with Charlie either, afterwards. and...

maybe Charlie doesn't know

[marvelfilth]

The mustache

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x f!reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Natasha crashes your date

Masterlist

You let a fake laugh bubble out of your mouth for what feels like a hundredth time this evening. Your date looks smug, her eyes trailing over your form, almost leering. She takes a sip of her wine and licks her lips slowly, daring you to look.

You don't.

You can almost hear Natasha say I told you so.

You clear your throat and take another bite of a perfectly made steak - the only saving grace of this disastrous date.

You mentally cringe, closing your eyes briefly. Objectively, the date is going well - she showed up on time, held the door for you, helped you to your seat and made perfect small talk, occasionally throwing in a joke or two. You can excuse her wandering eyes, knowing you've been throwing mixed signals all evening.

You nod along to whatever story she's telling, smiling and chuckling when it's appropriate. You barely resist the urge to excuse yourself. You chew on your lower lip, wondering how you allowed yourself to get in such a mess.

Your phone chimes once, screen lightning up with a new notification.

Natasha.

Yep. Here's your answer.

You look at your date, hating how different her smile is from your best friends. It's too large, too open and not even half as genuine. Natasha's smiles are small, barely noticeable, but they're enough to make your breath come short.

You sigh. You need to stop comparing your every date to Natasha.

“Do you mind if I take a look? It might be important,” you ask, reaching for your phone. She nods happily, waving the waiter over for another glass of wine.

How bad is it?

You snort, coughing immediately to cover up the sound and reaching for your glass.

Another message appears right in front of your eyes.

That bad?

You choke on your wine, discreetly looking around, but coming up short.

Six o'clock, dumbass.

You wait a moment and look right behind you, mouth falling open when you finally see her.

She's sitting three tables down, wearing your favorite hoodie and a black cap. With sunglasses covering her eyes. In a dimly lit restaurant. What makes you let out a strangled laugh, though, is a perfect old fashioned mustache glued right under her nose. She twirls both ends around her fingers, curling them up, before lowering her glasses and sending you an exaggerated wink.

The best spy in the world, the woman who made entire governments collapse, is sitting right behind you, looking like a child playing dress up.

You whip around, your face red, and wave off your date's concerned look. “I'm alright.”

She nods, all too happy to continue talking about all of the famous people she's met through her job.

You hide your phone under the table and shoot your best friend a text.

You're ridiculous

Her reply comes instantly.

And yet you love me.

Her words hit a little too close to home.

You are hopelessly in love with your best friend.

Another message comes through.

What's wrong?

You frown, eyes darting around. You didn't even do anything to warrant the question.

And don't even try to lie. I can tell something's wrong.

You sigh, tell Natasha everything is fine, and place your phone face down on the table, your date still recounting a story of how she met some actress.

The next half an hour is tense. You can feel Natasha's eyes on you. You can hear her plotting a way to get you out of here, but you know you have to at least try to make it work, if not with… Connie? Courtney? Then with someone else, before you go completely mad.

Your phone rings. You can't stop yourself from picking it up.

“Sorry, it’s an emergency.” Your excuse sounds bad even to your own ears, and you wince when your date pointedly looks away with pursed lips.

“Do you want me to throw her out of the window?” She starts without a preamble. “If not, I have a knife in my boot and you know how good I am with knives.”

“Can't you handle it without me?” You ask, knowing Natasha will play along. Your date reaches for her purse, dejected. Guilt swirls in your chest, and you contemplate your next words. Maybe you should stay and-

“Don't feel bad, she's been looking at the blonde to your right since she came in,” Natasha drawls, “and no, I can't handle it without you. I need you back home.”

You blush, biting on your lower lip.

“I'm sorry, but there's been an-”

“Just go,” your date cuts you off, “I'll handle the bill.” Her eyes are on the blonde girl before she's done speaking, and you leave with your conscience clear.

Natasha catches up to you outside and leads you to her corvette - her sunglasses and cap are gone, but that ridiculous mustache is still in place.

“What do you think?” She asks as she opens the door for you before going around the car and taking a seat behind the wheel. “I like the look.”

You snort and shake your head, amused with your best friend's antics. “It's… something.”

She rolls her eyes, starting the engine. “I know you love it.”

You hum, relaxing against the soft leather, your worries stoved away by Natasha's calming presence.

“Why do you keep going on dates if you hate it so much?” She asks when you reach Compound gates.

You sigh, think of an answer that would get her off your back without making her suspicious.

“I just… I-” you stutter, wincing.

Great.

She raises an eyebrow, looking absolutely ridiculous, but so, so beautiful, it makes your entire chest ache.

The car comes to a stop, and Natasha focuses all of her attention on you.

“I need to get over someone.”

There, you've said it.

“Who?” She asks, and for the first time in all the years you've known her you can't read her at all.

“You don't know them.”

She looks ahead, her jaw clenched tight. “How long?”

You blink away the tears. “A few years.”

She looks down at her lap, her fingers tapping against her thigh. “Who?” She asks again.

“Natasha…”

“Is it Carol?” Her voice is tight, her eyes dart around the street.

“God no,” you chuckle, thinking about your blond friend. Valkyrie would kill you on the spot if you even looked at her the wrong way, not that you're interested anyway. They need to get over themselves and finally admit their feelings to each other. Anyone can see their pining from a mile away.

“Kate?”

You shake your head. “You don't know them.”

“Then tell me. What would it matter?”

“Nat, can we just-”

“Tell me.”

You groan, and turn to open the door, but Natasha’s hand landing on your thigh stops you. You swallow, freezing on the spot.

“Please.”

You close your eyes, bracing yourself for the inevitable. “It's you,” you whisper.

The hand on your thigh clumps tight. “What?”

“It's you,” you repeat, feeling braver after the admission. “Always you.”

She lets out a deep, shaky breath, before reaching for your face with her other hand. “Look at me, please.”

You face her, eyes still closed, a few tears sliding down your cheeks. They're wiped away a moment later, and your face gets enveloped in the softest warmth.

“Open your eyes.”

You swallow, and do as she asked. She looks at you like you're the most precious thing in the world.

“I love you.”

Your heart skips a beat at her words, lips falling open. “What?”

She smiles, her thumb tracing patterns on your wet cheek. “I love you.”

You look at her for a long moment, taking in her features - her forest green eyes, tender and soft, the slope of her nose, so kissable. Your eyes trail lower and then suddenly a loud laugh makes its way out of your chest. You bend, clutching your stomach, happy tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.

Natasha looks delightfully confused.

“I'm sorry, it's just…” you giggle, pointing at her face, “the mustache.”

She groans, tearing it away. “I've been going crazy all this time, you know.”

“Yeah?” You grin, head spinning.

“Yeah,” she says before claiming your lips. She's soft, so soft it makes your toes curl and your chest get warm and fuzzy. The kiss is gentle, loving. You mewl against her, opening your mouth and welcoming her tongue.

The kiss grows heated.

“I,” you gasp between the kisses, “I love you. So much.”

You can feel her blinding smile in the next kiss, and the one that comes after.

[rosepascal]

I'm a feminist obviously || Joel Miller x Reader

I'm a feminist obviously But I wouldn't really mind him savin' me And I know that I'm fine without a man But I think I would like his protection - Prison for Life (Olivia Rodrigo)

Warnings: protective!Joel, he calls you baby girl, reader gets attacked by an asshole guy. Mentions of a fight. Low key dark Joel because he ain't letting that slide. violence, blood, cursing.

a/n: I heard this on tik tok and it just SCREAMS Joel miller sooooo. A good protective Joel fic <3

The town of Jackson wasn't exactly fond of you and Joel. Let's just say the rumors that started when you first showed up have spread amongst the town members and well, no one cares that they're just rumors.

Safe to say that when you walk through the town center that you aren't just imagining people whispering and staring you down as you walk past them. The only thing you can do is roll your eyes and keep going.

Please, like everyone in this town is free of blood on their hands.

The small general store worker refuses to meet your eyes as you pay for your groceries.

"H-Have a nice day." He says timidly as you stare at him stone faced. At this point you don't even try to change any ones mind. Still at least this kid isn't shooting you a dirty look. You nod and head out the door.

"Is that the Miller's bitch I see." Just your luck. Out of the corner of your eye you see Elijah Davis. Resident Jackson asshole.

Though most people who had a distaste for you and Joel, they stayed out of your way. Elijah was different. He was stupid. See Elijah used to be the big man in Jackson. Self proclaimed best hunter, best shooter. A real tough guy. Always led patrols and that kind of thing really got to his head.

When Joel came around well, they may not like Joel but you can't deny his skills when it comes to survival. Joel brought home the biggest catch, he shot down the most clickers. He saved the most lives and Elijah turned bitter. He just couldn't give it up

"I'm talking to you."

"Fuck off." You hiss at him. You turn so fast he flinches and it makes you smile.

"Seriously, this shit is getting old. Go cry to someone who gives a fuck." On most days he was all bark and no bite but today was different. You feel a harsh tug on your arm as you're pulled into a small side alley. He jams his forearm into your neck and pushes you against a wall.

"I'm getting real sick of you. Acting tough when all you are is Joel millers toy. Bet you keep his bed real warm." He spits angrily. The pressure on your neck gets worse as black dots swarm your vision. You drop your bag and claw his eyes as hard as you can.

"Fuck!" He screams as he lets go of you. Land on your feet but the lack of air causes you to wobble.

"Eat shit." You kick him hard in the side and he tackles you to the ground.

The left side of your face erupts in pain as he punches you hard. He doesn't let up and you do your best to defend yourself the way you learned back in the QZ.

"Hey! What the hell is going on here?" Elijah freezes as he hears the voice of Tommy Miller. Though you've got a bust lip and blood spilling from your mouth you smile.

"You're screwed now." You knee him hard right in the balls and he topples over in pain. Before Tommy could pull you off him you get in one last kick to the jaw.

"That's enough, both of you." He gently pulls you back as someone else pulls Elijah up from the ground. He's still groaning in pain and man is that music to your ears.

"What happened?" Tommy asks as you wipe the blood away from your mouth.

"He attacked me, I defended myself." Though Tommy was Joel's brother he was also Maria's husband and Maria didn't like violence inside the walls of Jackson. She meant business. She even scared Joel a little. You bend down to pick up what's left of your groceries and stuff them in your pockets.

"Look, I know how it goes, I'll pay the fine or work extra hours blah blah, See you Sunday for dinner." Your face aches as you walk.

The only thing you want now is a warm bath and a nap. You don't hear Joel as you walk inside and for once that's a good thing. Ellie appears at the back door ready to show something when her face scrunches up.

"What the fuck happened to you?"

"What?!" You hear Joel's voice come from behind her and you sigh.

"Thanks Ellie." Joel storms in the house.

His eyes frantically looking around until they land on you. Particularly on your fucked up face. His eyes turn dark as he orders Ellie to go outside. She leaves but not before mouthing Good Luck to you. He's like predator the way he walks up to you. His mouth twitching as anger swirls in his eyes.

"Who did this to you?" He gently tips your head up. It scares you how calm he is right now.

"Joel he was just being-"

"He? It was Elijah wasn't it." He growled lowly.

Sighing you know you can't hide it from him forever. He clenches his jaw and leaves to go to the medicine cabinet. With a clean rag he wipes away the dried blood and patches you up as best he can. Unfortunately most of your injuries will just have to heal on its own.

"M'gonna go take a bath." You stretch your arms out and wince slightly as you tilt your neck. Joel clocks it immediately.

"You need anything baby girl?"

"No, I'm okay." He kisses the top of your head and waits for you to go upstairs.

Once he hears the water running he grabs his rifle and leaves. It's like the townspeople can see the steam coming out of his ears. Joel's got a murderous look on his face as he storms through the town.

"Joel!" He glances to see Tommy chasing after him but he doesn't stop. He goes right to the little town hall and storms into Maria's. She looks unamused as he slams the door open.

"Where is he?!" Joel slams his hands on her desk.

"Doctors, pretty beat up and still crying about it." She doesn't even need to ask, she knows why he's here.

"I'm gonna kill em."

"No you aren't."

"If you think-"

"Joel!" Maria stands and stares him down. He's angry, seething with rage at the thought of that punk little shit laying a hand on you.

"I know you're angry, so am I. He's to blame here and he will be punished to the full extent of the law." She says calmly.

"So what? He gets thrown in jail for a couple days? Has to do extra patrols? Give up dessert?"

"I know you're angry, but don't do anything you'll regret. I can't protect you from the law forever Joel." She can't lose Joel, he's a valuable member of the community and he's family.

He clenches his fists and nods his head. Tommy appears and walks out with him. Trying to talk him out of what ever plan he's got brewing in his head. He knows that Joel won't back down that easy.

"He hurt her, I warned him that if he ever touched her he was a dead man." Joel smirks as he passes the doctors. Outside is Elijah bandages all over his face and a scared look in his eyes when he sees Joel.

Count your days motherfucker.

Joel disappears for a week. Out on a supply run alone and god did it make you nervous. He kissed you sweet before he left. Promised he'd come back. His fingers traced your face. Trying to be as gentle as he can around the sore spots.

"I love you." He mumbles quietly, "You know I'd do anything for you." You hum and kiss him again.

"I know," You can handle yourself, you've proved that time and time again you know how to protect yourself.

But with Joel you don't always have to. Knowing he'd burn down anything in his path for you means the world. Because you'd do the same.

You see Elijah once or twice in town while Joel's gone. He's on double patrol duty before his trial. Then he just, disappears. At first you don't notice it but then you hear whispers around town. A patrol went out with 4 and came back with 3.

When Joel comes back you tell him. Elijah's trial was yesterday and he never showed. They went to his room and he wasn't there. All his things were but he wasn't.

He was just, gone.

A few days later Tommy comes knocking on your door.

"Joel here?" You nod and call Joel down.

"It's been a week and no one's found Elijah. So it seems his trial is postponed indefinitely."

"Okay, thanks for coming to tell us." You squeeze Joel's hand and he just stays quiet. Tommy looks at Joel and deep down all three of you know exactly what happened with Elijah. But there's no proof and Tommy isn't going to turn over his own brother.

"Dinner next week?" You ask and he nods.

"I'm sure Maria would love to catch up." When he leaves you turn to Joel.

"Joel...If they ever found out-"

"I don't care."

"I do!" Your voice raises for a second before you stop yourself from shouting.

"Joel I won't let you jeopardize anything for me."

"Well that's too damn bad." He gets up and walks over to you. He cups your face and stares at you with an intensity you've never seen before.

"Baby girl, he hurt you." Joel would risk it all for you. Death, prison, anything. He kisses you gently as to not hurt your still healing lip.

"Nobody messes with my girl."

In a world like this you need to be able to survive, to fight and to make the hard decisions. But sometimes it's exhausting. Constantly protecting yourself wears you down. You know you can but you don't mind the idea of being protected by someone else.

You know you should hate the violence, the fierceness of his actions and words. But you don't. How could you when he's all you ever wanted.

[luveline]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞 | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚

the tension between you and miguel rises to an all-time high —a ficlet featuring a grumpy miguel and a flirty, distracted spider-girl. pre across the spider-verse but contains spoilers. fem!reader, 1k

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Miguel has asked you multiple times to leave him alone while he's working. The strike force can't run itself (or so he claims —Margo and Lyla seem plenty capable, in your eyes) and he needs time and solitude to organise the protection of canon events, and—

"Blah, blah, blah," you say, dropping your voice to a soft, teasing melody as you skirt around his frankly audaciously jacked chest. 

"Don't blah, blah, blah me," Miguel says. You'd be intimidated if you weren't so happy to mess with him. "I'm not kidding around." 

Okay, maybe you are intimidated. That just makes messing with him more fun. 

The room he operates from, as you've so fondly monikered The Office, is in organised chaos, and much too dark. You drag a lone chair toward his control panel and set yourself down in front of all his screens and computers. 

"Ooh," you hum, reaching for an unlabelled switch with a purposeful slowness. 

Predictably, Miguel slams his hand over yours, yanking your chair back with an annoyed, "No." 

"Come on, Miguel. What harm could I possibly do?"

"You could–" 

"Topple the multiverse?" you suggest. "I've heard." 

"You could turn off every member of the Society's DMW. That's what that does. Potentially endangering each of their lives by stranding them in unfamiliar dimensions, and preventing them from correcting canon events." 

You feel bad for teasing him when you see the look on his face, anger and exhaustion and the slimmest allowance of defeat. It must be tough to lead the Spider-Society. Tougher to micromanage more than half of its members. 

Pulling your hand from under his, you cross your arms over your stomach and give him an apologetic frown. "Sorry, Miguel."

Evidence of his sweet spot for you lines his expression, softening his sharp jaw and the stoic set of his brow. It's gone as quick as it came, and his mask falls back into place. He turns away from you as though pretending you aren't there and scans one of his holographic screens, his face glowing with a yellow-orange haze. 

Miguel has to tolerate you, because you're a Spider-Girl. Though you've never called yourself that aloud, and you're not sure anyone else has, either, it's an undeniable truth. You were bitten by a radioactive spider that gave you super mutant abilities, though yours aren't as potent as others. You're not especially strong, you probably couldn't stop a bus with your bare hands, but you're smart. You haven't saved the world or anything, but you lost your Uncle Ben. You paid the toll. 

Every spider person has lost someone. Miguel seems to have lost more than that. 

"You know," you mumble, kicking the ground lightly to make your chair spin on its axle, "I've been thinking…" 

"That's never good." 

"Why do we wear our suits here?" you ask, spinning for a second time, the room moving past your eyes in flashes. "It seems performative." 

"Ah, I can answer that. Some of us work when we're here." 

You wrinkle your nose at his deadpan and kick the floor again, spinning so fast it makes you laugh. "What did you say? I can't hear you from your high horse– woah!" 

Miguel grabs the back of your chair, bringing you to a sudden and firm stop. You blink hoping it'll assuage the dizziness between your eyes, and when it doesn't work you keel forward, muttering, "Woah, I'm gonna die." 

"You won't die." 

"How do you know?" you ask. 

"You're under my watch, aren't you?" 

"I knew you liked me," you say. "Oh, I don't feel well." 

"You brought it on yourself." 

You catch your breath. When you feel okay enough to stand you almost trip, and Miguel doesn't bother pretending that he had any intention of stopping you from landing flat on your face. The you before the spider bite would've wiped out. This you giggles and holds Miguel's elbow for a second while you plant your feet. 

"Okay, boss-man," you ask, looking up at the unnaturally high screen he's investigating. "What are we doing today?" 

"I'm supervising a task force operation on Earth-31913. You're going home." 

"Miguel," you say, not sure if you want to flirt with him or piss him off. He looks incredibly pissed off already, so you choose flirtation. "Have I told you how handsome you look this evening?" 

He doesn't react. His hands don't so much as shift where they're akimbo on his hips. 

"You really have the most handsome eyes," you continue, weaving around his arm to stand in front of him. You have to crane your neck to see them. "Sulky. Do I really have to go home? I'd rather stay here with you." 

He looks down his nose at you. "Yeah?" he asks quietly, his voice rough as hewn stone.

"Yeah," you say, taking a small step back. 

"And do what?" 

You mirror his stance, hands on your hips. Your suit isn't form fitting like his, doesn't showcase nearly so much lean muscle, but you like it. You'd chosen a simple black ensemble to match the spider who bit you with a pinky purple heart over your stomach. Miguel had asked about it once, just once, when you'd first met and he had no idea how much of a problem for him you were going to become. 

Why there? 

Why do you think? you'd asked, giving him a sticky-sweet smile. 

Forget I asked. 

He lifts a hand to your chin, pinching it between two deft fingers. You're lucky he isn't wearing his gloves; his claws would pierce your jaw. 

"What do you want to do?" he asks, again so quietly. "If you stay?" 

"I could help with the task force." 

"That's what you want to do?" 

You flush with heat but refuse to let him know how you're feeling. Your heart bumps against your ribs, breath caught in your throat as he tilts your head up, as he leans down. 

"No," he says near your lips, "that's not it." 

"I could help you?" you offer. 

Something flashes in his eyes. You hesitate to call it lust. It reminds you of a cat with a mouse in it’s clutches, only his pupils are blown, black and inky and wide as dimes. 

"You want to help me?" he asks, his lips an inch, half of that from yours. 

You nod minutely. "Yes," you say under your breath. 

His hand moves to your cheek. He leans in closer and closer, until there's a hair's width of air between his mouth and yours, the tips of your noses bent together. His breath fans over your bottom lip and it's hot. You swear you can feel his heart as his chest presses to yours. He lingers there for an endless handful of seconds, silently egging you on.

You call his bluff and refuse to close the distance. 

Miguel pushes you away from him, far from cruel but certainly not sweet. "I have a tower of paperwork you can file," he says. 

"Here I thought you were finally going to bite my head off," you hum. "You're a sore loser, Miguel." 

"And you're my pest," he says, holding your gaze for a half-second too long. He turns away. "Lyla? Arrange the recounts from the last canon event for Spider-Girl's perusal, please." 

"So you've remembered I'm here?" Lyla asks wryly.

You don't mind the paperwork. You sign each one with a winky face and a pink gel pen heart, knowing Miguel will go over them all again, and knowing he'll grow angrier and angrier with each heart.

He'll kiss you and mean it one day. You just have to play the waiting game.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

thanks so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed!

[vashtijoy]

have you seen the commentary from the p5r artbook going around? the shuake part of my dash is losing it a bit at the implication that their wishes were mutual!!! that seems to be what some people are getting from the commentary at least… amy insights?

Hi! I have been through the artbook. It's great, isn't it? :D

The image above is called "One Ending", and the creator caption (by illustrator Akane Kabayashi) reads:

When I think about how Akechi's wish was to play chess after school with the protagonist, I almost want to call him out with "You liked him after all, didn't you!"

Look at that. We're told about Akechi's wish, and what it included. We're as good as told outright that he likes Joker—and this isn't the only time, there's also this:

—There are a whole lot of things we can imagine, based on how the protagonist was depicted as someone special to Akechi. Those are more or less the exact emotions represented during Akechi's confidant. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)

"someone special" here is 特別な存在 tokubetsuna sonzai—literally "a special presence". It means a special person, and more than that; it describes someone you find compelling, someone you can't look away from, someone who becomes one of your most important people, the centre of your world. It's another term that is often romantic, but isn't necessarily romantic.

(In the same way, I think Kabayashi's suki jan! is more tongue-in-cheek than it is a cast-iron confirmation that Akechi was canonly in love with Joker. The language there is teasing, it's ambiguous, it's baity; Kabayashi is joking. This is a rank 6—as they say, if you know, you know. But it is of course ultimately up to all of you.)

There's another mention of this image, down in the creator interview:

Out of all the Maruki ending illustrations, it was Akechi's that stuck with me the most. It made such an impression to see them opening up as friends, having a fun, peaceful time together like high school students should. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)

What really strikes me in all of this is the emphasis the creators put on the fact that this is Akechi's illustration, Akechi's wish. Because I've thought for a while that we know Akechi has a wish. You can see him struggling with his refusals to Maruki in the first week of January. And you can hear his wish spoken—when Maruki repeats it back to him, during the boss fight, on 2/3:

Maruki {F1 81}君たちとなら、君も過ちのない道を歩めるかも知れないじゃないか！ {F1 81}-kun-tachi to nara, kimi mo ayamachi no nai michi o ayumeru kamoshirenai ja nai ka! If you're with {F1 81}―kun and his friends, you could begin to atone for what you've done! Think about it! With [Amamiya]-kun and his friends beside you, you could choose a path with no mistakes as well!

So this wish has several parts. First, there's that kimi mo, "you also"; it's tempting to read this as Maruki also wanting his new world to erase his past mistakes. Second, there's the first part, "if you're with [Amamiya]-kun and his friends". Where to even start here?

Being with Joker and the others is a prerequisite for the second half of Akechi's wish. It doesn't just coexist, it enables the rest of it. Just like his words in the engine room, "I wonder why we couldn't have met a few years earlier, [Ren]..."

Remember, Akechi's whole arc is about his rejection of trust and friendship, and his insistence on doing everything himself. This is precisely what Futaba calls him out on—"you trusted no one", or "you played life in single-player mode". This is what he unlearns at the climax of the engine room, when he realises he isn't prepared to let the others die—and follows through to save them.

Akechi is nothing without others, and he knows it. Without their support, which he believes he has no right to, he has no hope of living a better life, even were he to be given the chance—and he knows that, too. He has learned, and he has grown—and yet he knows the things he needs and wants so badly are forever inaccessible.

And his wish is about all the Phantom Thieves, not just Joker. There are many tiny references to this end—not least the original Japanese rank 10 line for his confidant, where he sacrifices himself for all of you. Joker is his compelling presence, his someone special, but he's formed small bonds with the others too, God help him.

and then there's the crime thing

The localisation frames Akechi's wish in terms of atonement, but that's not what's on offer. You cannot, after all, atone for things you never did. We see Akechi's wish put into practice, in the Maruki ending, where he appears with his friends beside him, wholly innocent and with unstained hands. And we see it in the first week of January, after he has finally met Maruki and spoken to him:

Akechi: Ah, that reminds me—there was one more thing I wanted to tell you. Akechi: About the reality Maruki's put us in... Akechi: It seems that Okumura and Wakaba are both considered alive by all accounts. [Ren: They're not dead anymore? / What do you mean?] Akechi: They aren't mere illusions, or cognitive beings—they truly are alive and existing in this world. Akechi: In fact, their deaths seem to have never taken place at all in this reality. [Ren: What happened to Shido?] Akechi: Shido was the only one arrested on the crime of attempting to overthrow the government... Akechi: It seems the Phantom Thieves were causing a stir in this society as well, but there's no record of your arrest now. Akechi: Basically, in this reality, you and I haven't committed any crimes.

While Akechi still remembers his crimes, they never took place. They have been undone, and only his lingering memory—and Joker's, at this point—speaks to them. He objects to this on countless levels, he summons all the strength he has to refuse it, but don't make the mistake of thinking that means he doesn't want it. This is Akechi's wish in action.

People are often very certain that Akechi's resolve in the third semester is like iron—that he rejects Maruki's offers right away, is never tempted, never wavers. But that can't be true. We know he's afraid to die. We know about the bad end where you don't complete the Palace, where Akechi says nothing and stares at the floor, seemingly blaming himself internally while all the others blame themselves aloud, for being unable to say no to Maruki's temptations. We know how he responds to this assertion of Maruki's—Maruki, who has perfectly summed up what we know all the other PTs wanted, and who (even if Word of God hadn't just confirmed Akechi's wish) we have, honestly, no reason to doubt.

Because Akechi never refutes this wish that Maruki describes. He never says he doesn't want it. He just rejects it—like all the others, who so desperately want what Maruki could give them. Futaba's mother, Haru's father. Akechi's life, and his innocence. And the people who might have been his friends, if he could dare, one day, to ask.

Akechi is tested just like the others, and the price he pays for his defiance is perhaps the highest of all.

and finally

[The Maruki ending illustrations are] of Maruki's world, where everyone's wishes are granted and they seem happy. The scene shows their actualised wishes, which were never granted in the real world. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)

We shouldn't forget the price Akechi pays for his impossible wish. Sure, the vision of himself being altered like Sumire clearly haunts him, and I'm sure it made the choice easier—but I don't think it made it that easy. Instead of taking the dream Maruki offered him, Akechi chose to face up to what he'd done, and who he'd become; at the very end, in the third semester and in the engine room, he always makes the right choice.

And that choice was taken away from him. Agency over his life and death, his own acts, and who he would even be—Joker and Maruki take it all away from him and make him a puppet, just like Shido.

Maruki's ending isn't pretty.

revision history

Click here for the latest version.

v1.0 (2024/03/29)—first published.

[alottiegoingon]

hc! married life

lucy maclean x fem!reader

summary: meeting lucy + being married to her

warnings: lucy is a dork, established relationship, its 2296-2300ish, it takes place after fallout finale and things get better after it, nothing but fluff and a married couple doing cute shit, no nsfw but mentions of it, quick cannibalism mentions (uh…), wasteland and life outside the vault brief mentions, reader wasn't born in the vault, not proofread, silly plot

when you first met lucy, you found her in the old antique store. you were talking to the not so nice lady that owned the place when you saw her step inside with an inquisitive gaze, observing a bunch of what it looked like junk to you. it was almost hilarious seeing a young woman wearing that goofy ass blue and yellow jumpsuit.

you were leaning against the wall in the corner, listening to all of her chattering about vault-tec. it sounded like nothing but utterly tedious

"it would be safe to assume that you do business with criminals. not judging you. don’t imagine there’s that many other options up here." blissfully unaware of the death stare coming from that lady, she boldly muttered and it immediately made you step out of the corner you were hiding in to save her

"she doesn't mean that! she's new here, sorry." you jump in, forced to intervene, touching lucy's shoulder and giving them a light squeeze. she furrowed her brows in response with your disapproving glance. “wha- who are you? i was just talking about the equipments!”

pulling her away from the place, you hear the hoarse voice behind you saying "fucking vault dweellers."

it didn't take longer than a day for you two to be friends. sharing stupid stories from her vault, fun facts, and learning about each other's life and family was one of the things that you bonded over

while you two were outside once, walking together by the wrecked lanes of what los angeles used to be, and lucy began to talk about her life in the vault and you were more than impressed and in disbelief of how naive vault dweellers could be

"wait, what do you mean?" your face twists at the second you heard lucy saying that the guy she married was an outsider that was responsible for killing half of her vault. "how can you married someone you've never met?"

"well, you see, when you marry someone from another vault, usually it comes with benefits! we gave them seeds and parts for machinery and they offered us a breeder!" lucy explains it all like the good teacher she is, assertively nodding with shoulders back

you forced yourself to repress a laugh by looking the other way, and she immediately noticed and questioned you incredulously but you knew her too well already to notice that she wasn't mad. "what is it?!"

"you people marry strangers for seeds and to have kids? that sounds... miserable. what if they are awful people or outsiders like that guy?"

"okay, when you say it like that..." she loses her shoulders, brushing her confidence away, gulping and chuckling awkwardly. "but you are an outsider. and you aren't that bad."

"careful there. it makes you sound like you are very found of the outsider here, lucy maclean." you stare back at her and see a tender smirk peeking onto her lips. her body slightly leaning against yours, and a soft gaze that swiftly averted when you caught her. she didn't deny it though, you thought

it took her one kiss to invite you to live with her after your mission was done and you gladly accepted.

the invitation was up even after all the truth about her dad. after all the traumatic experience, on the way to your new home, you never left her alone not even for a second. you were always holding hands, sharing glances, leaning against each other and making her giggle as you were losing the track of how many times you kissed her face

in the vault, after everything was settled, you had all the time in the world to take care of her and learn about each other. you would spend hours running your fingers through her hair, listening to whatever she said and playing with her fingers while holding her hand. you would let her talk about all the memories with her family and carefully laugh along or comfort her when needed

you knew that you couldn't erase her bad memories from what had happened but you could create new ones and you focused on that

it was about time when she proposed to you, stuttering, crying and using a bunch of silly expressions like "holy moly" or "jeepers creepers"??!

don't get me started on the honeymoon. yes, you were living in a giant metal capsule but you could swear that as soon as you left the room after days, you were able to breathe fresh air.

lucy wasn’t exactly the easiest person to appease. especially not after finally seeing through the entire “breed” thing that everyone in the vault worshipped so much and experiencing what actually love could be. turns out that sex isn’t something people do just to have kids and “recolonize” the earth, after all

strongly believe that she would be such a loud and whiny girl when you touch her. even the slightest graze would make her legs tremble and she would go like 🥺

"wanna cook together?" "wanna go gardening?" "wanna watch a movie?" "hi, princess, wanna read something together?" "teach me your repair skills?" and her answer would always be "okey dokey" and a huge smile

your favorite part about gardening was to plant food and use it for dinner as you cooked together. and by that, it meant that you would cook while she was happily seating following you around with a cooking book giving you orders like a princess

in other times, you were proud to distract her on purpose by hugging her waist from behind, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. reasonable to assume that the entire room would smell like smoke as she cried at the sight of you on her knees and between her legs, eating her out

when it came to help around the vault, you were a great teacher along with your wife, making sure that all the facts were correct but in a less traumatizing way in order to not scare all the kids with “yeah, so basically all my family got killed by explosions but, hey, i’m here now!”

after a long day, watching movies was your favorite thing to do. one night, when discussing all the different genres of movies that lucy had never seen, you mentioned a specific one

“you know, my grandma used to tell me about this really weird show from the 2020’s where some creepy teenage girls ate each other after crashing into the wilderness.” and lucy’s face goes pale, looking like 😦

“golly gee… i hate it up there.”

[ktsumu]

retired apartment neighbour!john price who just misses protecting someone warnings: he's tampering with your stuff, implied home invasion, stalking

belatedly dedicated to @soumies who brainstormed this!!!

-

Your sink isn't working again.

Two months ago, it was a worn washer and something else the repair guy that your landlord sent told you. The last time, the drain wasn't up to fighting anymore.

This time? You don't know what the fuck it is.

Sometimes, you can fix it yourself— save some good money. Sometimes, something's obviously loose, because you remember that you tightened it well the time before. You make it right again and leave it, but then it just drips again. It makes you worry about the day you don't notice the sound and the wood starts to rot.

You've asked down the hallway a bit about whether their kitchens suck too, but they give you funny looks. You don't know why you've got the cursed unit, but it seems that everyone else is doing just fine.

Everyone but John, at least, because he worries about you.

John Price is half-neighbour, half-friend, half-stranger. That's too many halves, but he's big enough to fit them all.

The five months he's lived next to you, he's been nothing but kind. He's caring, funny when you're tired, helpful. You call him Price in passing, John when you need him for something; he answers dutifully to both.

(He's protective, too, frightens boys you bring back for yourself. You guess that nature came with the dog tags.)

He's kind, but you don't know him outside of when you need him, really. Neither of you seem to mind, though, since you're sure he's a busy man and he probably thinks you're too young to waste time on.

Now is one of those times that you need him.

The wrench in your cramping hand clatters against your kitchen floor, sweat beading at your hairline and under the neck of your shirt. It's the hottest night recorded in a decade and here you are; working on your fucked up sink instead of taking a cold shower.

Being too loud isn't a concern— your hallway is full of rabbits and your building manager lives below you; you hope he hears you groaning.

When you hear a knock, knowing who it's from, you start to care a little bit.

"Everything right?"

"I'm fine," you tell him, but it's wheezy. "Sorry for being loud."

Price simply opens your door, enters your home. It's barely ever locked when you're here, you aren't as careful as you used to be. Sometimes, if he's talking to you, he walks right in.

You never really say anything about it. You don't mean it as an invitation, but it comes out as one.

"It's that sink again?"

"How'd you know?"

Price is already in your space— looming over you, squatting to a kneel. One of his hands guides you away from the cabinet and you follow him without question.

He takes the wrench you gave up on. "S'always the sink with you, kid."

You see glimpses of history in Price. Like how he slides himself under your sink even though it's small, almost silent. Like how he grips your rusty wrench like a knife, backhanded, thumb closed over the handle's end.

His skin is covered in sweat, too, dewy under your kitchen light. It beads by his beard.

There's an ugly grind of metal versus metal, something tightening or being forced back into place. Price drops his thick arms again, lifting himself out from under your counter, and he hands you your tool back.

"How did you," you trail, "how did you know—?"

"Knew where to look, love." He laughs quickly when your face is blank. Price is taller than you remember when he stands, leaning on your kitchen island. "I've seen worse than some sink pipes, yeah?"

Of course he has.

It's why you mostly get him to fix things up in your place. Always knows what's wrong with your stupid apartment.

"Yeah, sorry."

Price doesn't leave when he helps you, either.

He waits, eyes trained on you when you get around your kitchen, getting the water jug and your tray of half-frozen ice cubes, asking if he wants some water. You think most people would kindly refuse, but Price always sticks around.

This time, though, he seems like he's gotten his fill, eyes lidded as he waves a hand when you go for the fridge. "M'good, love. Just call me when it goes again."

Your kitchen is uneasy. You know it isn't him, and it's probably you and the stress from the fact you can't sleep in the heat. The AC sounds like it's fighting in your window.

"How do you know it's gonna break again?" you ask. You know it sounds dumb, because you know your whole unit is a bit of garbage, but he's quiet. "Didn't you fix it well?"

John isn't looking at your eyes, he's looking at where your arms are crossed over your chest, hiding the sweat under your arms and collar. He's looking at your bare legs.

"I did," he assures you, always. "It's just a bad sink, lovie."

Just a bad sink, s'all it is.

"Yeah, it is, huh?" you ask, breathing a laugh at the stupidity of it all. At this rate, he'll be coming in to help you until you move out.

He steps toward you again, resting a heavy hand on the small of your back. You don't realize, don't even notice the fact he's nearly guided you out of your apartment until you're at the door.

Are you seeing him out, or is he seeing you?

John feels intimate when he's this close— head tilted, brows slightly raised, thumb tapping on your spine.

"Call me next time, alright?" he tells you, like you'd imagine he'd coo at a rescue. "I'm always around.”

You just nod. Something is pushing you closer and something is pushing him out.

"I will, promise."

"Have a good one then, kid. Take it easy tonight.”

"Thanks, John. I really, really appreciate you helping."

"Just what neighbours do, aye?"

He waits by the door as you close it, watching your smile just as you watch his, warm like a fire. Something makes your hand rest on the lock.

(You know you shouldn't need to, but you kneel in front of your sink when he leaves, knees pressed against the cold floor.)

Something itches in your stomach, not intuition but not ease either, nipping at the back of your brain. You almost feel stupid, using your phone flashlight to feel around the pipe that's never right, looking for something to tell you that you aren't acting crazy for doing this.

There's something you remember seeing earlier, right? Something obvious that you checked to see if it was the issue, or something you replaced last time, or something you paid for.

Your fingers feel nothing where there should be something— a piece is definitely gone, a washer or a nut, maybe old putty you remember cringing at.

It could be lost under the lip of the cabinets, maybe. Maybe that's where it is. It isn't him, surely. He wouldn't do that. There's nothing for him to do that for.

John Price has does done nothing but be kind to you— who are you to blame him for anything?

-

A missing handful of little metal pieces is dropped into a duffel, out of his fisted hand. It clatters against the rest of them.

[miserable-sarah]

I Care 18+

Pairing: Dean x Reader Warnings: NSFW, smut, 18+, fingering, oral (F), mentions of blood, bad language, unprotected sex, praising. Requested: Heyyy, idk of ur requests are open but if they are can u please write a dean Winchester x ex girlfriend smut who is a hunter and who dean is still not over. Sam and Dean rescue her from a vampire nest and dean is angry and worried after her and she's all like "stop acting like you care" and he says something like "I'll show u how much I care" + angst + kinda enemies x lovers + dark dean? + marking ; ( set in early seasons llke;1,2,3) A/N: I did make a few changes, let me know if you enjoy it! Thanks!

~

You've been hunting down this nest of vampires for a while. It was a big nest, bigger than you've ever seen. It's a hard job alone but you're confident enough in yourself to do it.

Well at least that's what you thought, you see you went into the nest killing almost all of the vampires that were there. You somehow missed calculated the amount. You got taken down and now you're tied up with no way out. You are dreading this, you have no one coming to save you. You're not scared, you're angry. you're mad that they caught you, and mad that you can't get out by yourself. You don't want to be turned into a vampire or have all of your blood drained from your body. So this sucks. You can hear the vamps talking about something they're too quiet to make anything out.

"Hey! Are you guys gonna do anything with me or?" You ask getting annoyed, you'd rather just die now. They just ignore you of course. So you start singing at the top of your lungs to annoy them, they have "super hearing", you know it bothers them. You continue for a couple minutes until someone, you're assuming the head vamp, comes over to you right in your face.

"Shut up!" He yells in your face "I'll kill you right now!" Just as you were about to say something, you hear a commotion. The head vampire cuts your stomach making you wince, then he leaves without saying a word.

"Aw come on, don't leave me here." You say in a stale tone. "We were having fun." you add. After a couple minutes, you don't hear anything.

"Well, well, look at who we have here."

"Oh, fucking kill me." You mumble to yourself.

"Couldn't handle the nest?" Dean smirks at you. You don't say a word just ignore him. "A thank you would be nice."

"Dean, leave her alone." Sam says to him, Sam comes over to you and unties you.

"Thank you, Sam." You smile at him. You glare at Dean.

"Are you alright?" Dean drops his tough guy act.

"Fine." You say sternly, you walk away from the boys trying to leave the building. You however, weren't fine. You were bleeding and had no idea.

"You're bleeding pretty bad." Dean says to you.

"It's fine, it's nothin-" You look down and see what he's talking about. You're covered in blood. You lift up your shirt and see a huge cut on your stomach. "Oh no." You feel dizzy and then Dean's arms around you as you fall.

~

You wake up in a motel room, not unusual.

"Dean?" You say softly looking around the room.

"Hey, you okay?" He answers, he sits next to you placing his hand on your back.

"Yeah, fine. Thanks." You mumble. You stand up even though your stomach is in pain.

"You should relax for at least a few more hours."

"Nah, I'm good." You say looking around for your things.

"Y/n, I'm serious." Dean says to you in a frustrated tone.

"Dean, I don't care. I'm fine."

"Y/n! Sit down!" He gets angry with you.

"No!" You yell, you have to hold back a wince. He's right you are hurt but you're not going to sit in a room with your ex boyfriend because you're hurt. You can recover somewhere else.

"You're hurt. Something can happen to you!"

"Oh and now you care?" You roll your eyes. "Stop acting like you care."

That was it for Dean. He stood up and got right in your face. "You don't think I care, huh?" He chuckled at you. "I'll show you how much I care." He said with promise. Dean smashes his lips on yours, at first it took you by surprise but you came around to it very quickly. You kiss back but then pull away.

"Dean what are you doing?" You say trying to push him away but he doesn't budge. "We can't, I mean we broke up. It's been months-"

Dean has been on your mind since you two broke up. It was over something stupid, literally so stupid you don't even remember what it was about. You were in love with Dean, well you still are. He treated you like a princess, but like a bad ass princess. He was your safe place and you were his. When you broke up it just so happened to also be a really bad time in his life and he needed to leave. So he did, you two never got to fix what was broken.

"Stop talking." Dean interrupts you. You go to say something else, Dean cuts you off by kissing you, again. This time you immediately kiss back. You slide his jacket off and tug at his shirt. He breaks the kiss to lift his shirt off. Your hands run down his muscular body. You almost moan in excitement.

Dean carefully took off your shirt, trying not to hurt you. He unclipped your bra and tossed across the room. His hands gently massaged your breasts, you let out a little whine. You've been so needy for him it's pathetic. Dean picks you up effortlessly and drops you on the bed. He unbuttons your jeans and slides them off your body, you can feel yourself getting wet with anticipation. Dean hovers over your body he kisses you softly, then your neck, down to your chest, then down your stomach and all the way to your panty line.

"Dean, please" You beg quietly. You hear Dean chuckling.

"Patience sweethheart." He says as he slowly takes off your panties. He kisses up your legs to thighs incredibly slowly. You groan in frustration Dean ignores your frustration.

"Please!" You beg louder.

"Look at how wet you are." He smiles at you "All for me?" He smirks.

"Yes" You moan softly.

Dean finally enters a finger in you, you moan in relief. He watches your face making sure you're enjoying it, he enters another finger and thrusts them deep curving his fingers to make sure he hits your g-spot. You moan louder at the feeling, it's been months since you've been with Dean, well anyone for that matter. Dean always knew what to do to please you though, he just knew your body so well.

"You like that baby?" He asks, you nod and moan "Words" He says

"Yes, Dean." You say softly.

"Good girl." He smirks at you. Dean dips his head between your thighs, you feel his tongue directly on your clit.

"Oh my god." You let your head hit the bed and close your eyes. Dean continues to pump his fingers in and out of you while his tongue dances around your clit. It feels so amazing. You start to buck your hips, he puts his arm around your hips to hold you down.

He adds a third finger stretching you out for him. You moan and whine, it feels good but you want him. All of him.

"Dean, please" You pant. He ignores you, he keeps sucking and licking your clit. "please." you whimper. He still doesn't listen. Your legs are shaking and you try to squeeze your thighs together but Dean won't let you. Your moans become more desperate. "Feels so good" He keeps going he can tell your close by the way you're squeezing his fingers.

Your buck your hips up, you let out a loud moan, your vision goes blurry and you see stars. Dean slowly pulls his fingers out, you look down at him out of breath. He licks his lips then smiles at you.

"You taste good." He slowly crawls up to your face and kisses you. You kiss back and pull him closer. You reach your hand down his stomach and realize he's taken off his jeans. You palm him through his boxers, he lets out a groan. Dean takes your hand and puts it down his boxers you take his invitation and pump his cock slowly. Dean kisses and bites your neck. You pull your hand out and pull his boxers down springing him free. He moans at your movements.

You tried moving to get on top of Dean but he stopped you. "You're hurt. Let me take care of you." he says kissing your forehead. He lightly brushes his hands down your body to your legs, he places them around his waist. He lines himsef up with you and slowly enters you. You and Dean let out a loud moan. "You feel so good." He says through his teeth. "So nice and tight."

"You're so big." You arch your back.

"I've missed you." He says he leans down and kisses you, you kiss back. He rests his forehead on yours, in this moment everything feels right. It feels like everything is going to be okay. You've missed this feeling.

"You're doing so good, taking all of me." Dean praises "Such a good girl." His words make you weak.

"You feel so good." you moan. Dean switches positions he leans up and places your legs on his shoulders, deepening his thrusts. You moan louder, so does he. His grunts and groans are getting more frequent.

"Damn baby, I've missed this pussy." He brings his fingers to your clit and starts rubbing "I can't believe this is all mine. Only mine."

"Yes, all yours."

"I know." He mumbles. Dean continues to rub your clit causing your legs to shake. You whimper and try to move around. "I know baby, I know." He coos at you. "Feels so good, huh?" You nod. "Words." He reminds you.

"Y-yes." You stutter "So good." He's so focused on pleasing you, his hair is messy, his body is glistening, his grunts and groans are filling the room along with your moans. You can feel your whole body shaking, your walls are clenching around him.

"Damn baby you're squeezing me so tight." Dean moans. His thrusts get deeper and faster. "Are you going to cum for me?"

"Yes" You moan "Feels so good."

"I know, you feel so good too." He groans. "I'm not going to last long with you squeezing me like that."

"I'm gonna-"

"Go ahead baby, cum for me." His fingers rub faster on your sensitive clit, with every thrust he hits your g-spot, his words are ringing through your head. Your body starts twitching, your legs shaking, you close your eyes tight, you try to scream but nothing comes out. Dean helps you ride out your orgasm, soon after you feel him fill you up. He lightly presses his body on yours and catches his breath.

You wrap your arms around Dean and hold him. He kisses your shoulder a few times before rolling off you. "Uh, let me clean you up." He says awkwardly. Dean gets up and grabs some clean towels he cleans you up then cleans himself up. "I'll change your bandage too."

"Dean." You grab his arm. "Just come lay down."

"But-"

"Please." You cut him off. He nods and lays down next to you, you move yourself so you're laying your head on his chest. "I've missed you." You look up at him.

"Me too." He says softly "Sorry-"

"Dean. It's okay. I know you had to go." You cut him off. "I'm sorry I never got to apologize."

"I know." He pulls you a little closer to him.

You're not sure what will happen next, you're hopeful it'll work out between you two. You both have a lot of love for each other, if it's meant to be it will be. But for right now all you want to do is enjoy your night with Dean Winchester.

[paradisedumpling]

Like it's the only thing I'll ever do

_________________________________________

TROPE: bandmates!au; guitarist!yunjin; bassist!reader; silent pining; songfic(?); angst with a happy ending

SYNOPSIS: when a love song leads to a misunderstanding between two bandmates that are unawarely in love with each other, will they be able to fix everything and save not only their friendship but a future romance?

CONTENT WARNING: suggestive themes; use of feminine terms; insecurity; mentions of overworking; the characters are not good at communicating; not fully proof readed; author sucks at synopsis; feel free to tell me if I forgot anything!!

A/N: not one of my proudest works tbh but!! if you're interested in any of the songs mentioned/played I linked them down bellow!!

THE SERAPHIMS: track_1.mp3; track_2.mp3; track_3.mp3; track_4.mp3; track_5.mp3; track_6.mp3; track_7.mp3; track_8.mp3; track_9.mp3

_________________________________________

Nodding your head as you felt satisfied with the melody, your right hand left the strings to write down at the notebook in front of you.

Your fingers strummed the strings on the body of your bass guitar, a low humming coming from your throat as made up melodies in the empty studio.

Your brows furrowed together as you erased and changed a few words, writing the lyrics with better rhymes and harmonies.

"You don't have to say you love me. I just wanna tell you something. Lately you've been on my mind..." You softly sang, a smile plaguing your face as you thought about the person the lyrics were about.

"Then say it." You jumped in surprise at the sudden voice, turning around to see your bandmate Chaewon closing the studio door behind her.

"I didn't hear you coming." She laughed at your words, walking towards her keyboard and setting her things at the foot of the instrument. "What do you mean, though?"

She stared at you, an annoyed expression you were well familiar with plastering her face. An expression all of your bandmates were well familiar with. But you only blinked at her, making her shake her head in disapproval at your confusion.

"You should tell Yunjin you like her, you know." You immediately nodded your head disapprovingly, closing your lyrics book as if that would make her end the subject right there. But she kept on talking. "Come on! You keep writing songs about her that are so obvious even our fans are suspecting something! Just tell her already."

"They're suspecting something because they're dissecting the lyrics, it's different." You told her, getting up from the floor. "Besides, Yunjin already likes someone." You mumbled sadly, sighing as you and Chaewon began preparing the instruments for today's practice. "Half of our last album was all about this girl she likes." You grumbled under your breath, rolling your eyes at all the memories of her singing her songs with a big fond smile during practice and shows. "She spends every hour singing about how she's a thousand degrees in love with this girl and how she's her angel in the doorway and stuff like that!" You rambled, pacing around the room as you momentarily distracted yourself with your jealousy, rolling your eyes every few words as the lyrics of Yunjin's countless love songs passed through your mind. "I don't understand how someone can be so amazing to be such a muse to her and–"

"What did my spare drumsticks do to you?" Kazuha's voice halted you in your steps, making you realize you've been waving her drumsticks around furiously while rambling. You turned to face her, waving awkwardly as you watched the girl and Eunchae fully enter the studio and close the door behind them.

"Sorry, Zuha." You smiled apologetically at the girl, letting her sticks down on her drum seat. "I didn't see you two arriving."

"Clearly." Eunchae's giggles made you sigh defeated, going back to your bass as you dreaded what you knew would be coming in a few seconds. "What's with you?"

"Yunjin's unknown crush" Chaewon had a tone in her voice as she answered Eunchae you didn't quite understand, but the newly arriving girls laughs made you embarrassed enough not to bother much, simply wanting their teasing to stop and the last two remaining band members to arrive so you could finally begin practice.

"You should confess, unnie." Eunchae came up to you and laid a hand in your shoulder, her laughter dying down as she gave you a sympathetic smile.

"No, and that's final." You gave her and the other two girls as much of a serious look as you could, stopping at Chaewon to point a finger at her to emphasize your words. Then, you shrugged your shoulders, moving to plug your bass on your amplifier as you spoke again. "Besides, I don't want to ruin our friendship and break my heart at the same time, thank you very much."

"Suit yourself." Eunchae patted your back, going to check on her sound table to prepare for today's practice.

You thought that would be the end of it for now, feeling your shoulders a bit tenser at the idea of ever confessing to Yunjin. But Kazuha passed through you and dropped a comment that made you giggle, it managing to help easy your worried for the moment.

"That would make for a neat album though."

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Scribbling down furiously, you crossed out another verse that would not make it to the final song, tapping the end of your pen on top of the page you are writing in a random rhythm.

So far you only had the pre-chorus and the chorus. And with festival season coming soon, you knew the deadline to produce at least a few new singles for the concerts was approaching rather quickly. But after Chaewon's comment a few days ago, you were afraid to write anything that'd be too obvious and give your feelings away.

You were about to write some new rhymes down when your pen was taken from your fingers, a pair of hands clapping in your line of vision mere seconds after.

"Are you even listening?!" Your keyboardist asked irritatedly as you looked up from your lyrics book to her, catching all of your band and your manager staring at you.

"No, sorry." You smiled apologetically, averting Chaewon's irritated eyes and instead giving you attention to Sakura, suddenly very aware of the burning gaze Yunjin was throwing your way. "What was it, Kkura?"

"We're discussing the setlist for tomorrow." Instead of the japanese girl, who answered your question was the person you didn't want to face.

It wasn't like you didn't like Yunjin's face, far from that. You would stare at her beautiful eyes and rosy lips and cute nose for hours on end if allowed to. But the realization that she caught you distracted writing songs about her made you shy under her gaze, and you didn't wish to embarrass yourself any further in front of your team and the girl you loved liked.

"What are we not agreeing on about?" You muttered nonchalantly, looking down to busy yourself with closing your lyrics book, tapping the spine mindlessly to try and appeal unbothered.

"I want us to play Nauseous and I Hate the Way." Eunchae chimmed in, sounding rather annoyed, which made you grin amused and look up at her. "Kazuha thinks we should play Sour since it's been a while and manager thinks we should play Sour and Wonder instead of my two songs."

"Chaewon and I think we should cover Paramore or Muse." Sakura gave her thoughts, sliding a paper with a few songs from the legendary bands the two girls thought could fight your band.

"It would be a great surprise indeed." You nodded at your manager's words, scanning the paper with a serious face, thinking.

"What about Yunjin?" You lifted your head to look at the girl after a few seconds, catching her intense brown eyes still on you. The girl flashed you a smile upon seeing you finally give your attention to her, laying her head on her hand as she leaned on the table, not caring that she was blocking Eunchae's and your manager's view of you.

"I'm fine with anything you decide on, pretty girl." Her words struck your heart sharply, making your heartbeat fasten in pace as your cheeks grew hotter. You lightly cleared your throat, forcing yourself to roll your eyes to look unfazed.

Yunjin was always confident and affectionate, it wasn't uncommon for her to disguise compliments as flirtatious comments. And you hated that you loved it so much even though she liked somebody else.

"Well then, Jennifer. I like the idea of the cover and I agree we should play Sour." You gave Yunjin a teasing grin, trying your best to match her energy as you snatched your pen back from Chaewon's hands and circling a few songs your friends had picked down on the paper. "But since we're approaching summer we should stay with Nauseous, it fits the season more." You glanced around your bandmates to see their opinions, muffling a giggle as Eunchae pulled Yunjin back to look at you better.

Once everyone nodded and began discussing which song you should cover for your next show, you relaxed on your chair and opened your lyrics book again, writing down some verse ideas that popped into your head after the previous interaction with the girl that managed to snatch your heart. No matter the situation, Huh Yunjin never failed to inspire you.

But you couldn't absorb yourself too deep inside your brain again as Chaewon asked a question that made the room be filled with tension.

"We could do an acoustic version of your new song."

"You have a new song?" Yunjin barely let Chaewon finish her sentence before she snapped her neck towards you, eyes a bit wide as she asked the question with a serious and curious face.

"Hm, yeah." You slammed your lyrics book shut once you realized Yunjin's eyes travelled down to it, putting both of your hands on top of it to make sure none of it was visible to the guitarist's eyes. "But it's nowhere near finished." You told the others, although your eyes were still carefully watching Yunjin's every move. Her eyes remained on your book still. "I barely have a verse yet, so it's a no for now."

The table fell quiet, everyone staring between you and Yunjin as you quietly watched each other, both being filled with bitter feelings you would hate to admit out loud. But what you didn't know, was that your members and manager all knew the reason behind both of yours defensive actions.

They alternated their stares between Yunjin and you, knowing the american's mind was brewing with jealousy at the person behind your lyrics, and knowing you were spiralling in insecurity at the treat of the girl you liked finding out about the reason behind your songs when you thought she was into someone else.

But what you didn't know was that Yunjin's crush was you, and the guitarist felt as much jealousy and hopelessness towards your love filled songs as you did with hers.

Chaewon had wanted to tell you two about your feelings for one another the moment your friends picked up on it, but Sakura had forbidden her from it. Saying you two needed to figure it out on your own for the sake of the band and your own feelings. What they weren't expecting whoever, is that you were both too dense to realize anything and too scared to confess and cause a strain to your friendship and harm the band.

So now moments like these were filled with an awkward tension as neither you friends or your managers were allowed to say anything, and you and Yunjin were too deep in your own thoughts to realize the room had fallen into silence.

"What is it called?" Yunjin let out in a tight neutral tone, bitting back her tongue to keep the venom of jealousy to spill out with the words. She stared into your face with intensity, searching any sights of the soft eyes she was well accustomed with seeing whenever you spoke about your crush. But you refused to meet her gaze.

"I'm still not sure... Jen, I–" You cut yourself, unsure of why you wanted to explain anything to her. Swallowing down hard, you licked your lips and spoke again. "Let's focus on tomorrow, guys." You gazed around nervously, silently asking your friends for help to change the subject. Luckily, they seemed to understand you.

"Yeah, Yunjin." Sakura broke in, bringing the attention back to the list on her hands. "We'll worry about it later. Right now, let's focus on the song we need to learn and rehearsing for tomorrow."

You shot Sakura a small but grateful smile, carefully turning your attention towards Yunjin and finding the girl slumped on her chair, fiddling with her fingers with a pout on her lips. You didn't understand why she looked upset, but you'd wonder about it another time.

Not wishing to embarrass yourself any further, your attention remained on the subject discussing in the table. For the remaining time there, your lyrics book stayed shut and tucked away in your bag, as did any wandering thought about your feelings for a certain american guitarist.

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A loud piercing sound invaded your eardrums as you slammed your hands in the keys of the piano, a frustrated groan accompanying it as you let your head fall back, eyes screwed shut at the headache brewing in your head.

Your bass guitar laid discarded on the floor, had long served it's tenor sonoric purpose in your composition. Surrounding your instrument, numerous paper balls of sheet music and ripped pages from failed ideas littered the floor.

Your back was aching from sitting without a resting place for too long and you weren't sure if your phone even had battery anymore, you didn't know where it was. All you wanted was to get the melody and arrange correct for your new song, but it seemed like every idea you wrote down and played didn't sound right. You were beginning to lose your patience for the day.

With another frustrated groan, you erased yet another failed set of chords. Throwing you pen to the side, you brought a hand to massage your temple when a pair of firm hands pressed down on your shoulders, massaging the tension away skillfully.

"It looks like a hurricane passed through here." Yunjin's voice entered your left ear in a calm whisper, her hot breath fanning on your neck making a shiver run down on your body. "Are you doing okay?" Her concern warmed your heart and you nodded at her question, leaning back on her body behind you with a satisfied sigh.

"Nothing I play is enough." The moment you mumbled that Yunjin's hands immediately left your shoulders to slide down to your front and hug you as tight as she could in the position you were in.

"That's not true–"

"I barely contributed on our last album!" You didn't let her speak further, cutting her words as you pressed down random keys in the piano, wincing as the loud sounds only made the pounding in your head worsen. "What am I even doing in this band anymore?" The phrase left you mouth in a defeated whisper, the exhaustion of a night full of frustration being spilled in the presence of the girl.

"Hey." Yunjin's voice was firm as she pulled back and spun you around to face her. "That's not true and you know that." She grabbed your face with both hands, squeezing your cheeks together to make it difficult for you to speak in case you tried to interrupt her again. You hummed annoyed, but she sent you a look that made you slump defeated. "The amount of songs you make for an album does not mean you didn't contribute to it. You're an essential part of this band just as much as any of the girls." You looked down feeling a bit embarrassed, but Yunjin simply lifted your head again, moving one hand to the back of your neck while the other moved to take strands of hair off of your face. Her tone became softer as she spoke again. "Besides, we all know this band wouldn't even exist if it weren't for you and your genius brain, pretty girl."

You rolled your eyes at her, but you didn't fight the small smile that made its way to your lips at her words. Despite all the frustration clouding your mind, you knew everything she said was true. Specially the last part.

Initially, The Seraphims was only a college project you made for extra grades and the band only consisted of you, Yunjin and Kazuha at the time. You all took the band as seriously as any college student in need of grades would and were all ready to break off as soon as the grading came out. But a friend of yours wanted the band to play at his birthday party and despite having only one song you wrote in high school, you insisted you all played for a crowd bigger than your classmates at least once.

After that night Yunjin was booked, but Kazuha still had her insecurities regarding the band. It took a lot of pleading and assurance from you and Yunjin to get her to attend practice again and eventually she was as invested as the two of you.

As the band grew famous and it began to be too much for three of you to handle alone, Chaewon and Sakura came to the picture through personal invites. Chaewon was Yunjin's dorm roommate and a talented pianist, and Sakura was your Valorant buddy and a great guitarist. The two butted heads the moment they met and for the first few rehearsals with the five of you it felt like The Seraphims were done for. But you pushed through every practice even if half the band was fuming the whole time and Kazuha was laughing so much she couldn't focus on her drums. Eventually, the two oldest members in the band found equal passions outside of music and a shared love for soju, becoming so close you couldn't even tell today that they screamed insults at each other every five seconds.

Eunchae was the last piece you were missing. During the making process of your first album, five young adults fresh off of music school wished nothing but to explore new sounds. And it all proved to be too much for Chaewon to handle alone during shows, so you and your new manager decided to open up auditions for a new synthesizer, something that was easily agreed on by the other girls. And thus Eunchae came in one day, a bright smile on her face and excitement oozing off her skin playing a remixed version of your first ever song Back To Me. Two minutes in and you all new that skilled girl would be the new member of The Seraphims.

Had you not glued the band together all those times, the six of you might have never been were you where or had met the wonderful person that Eunchae was.

"Okay, you got me there." You told Yunjin, giggling when she smiled brightly at you. "I still can't get this stupid song right, though." You turned back around to face the piano, rubbing your temples as you stared at the open pages of your lyrics book.

"Scoot over, sweetheart." You watched as Yunjin sat on the piano bench at your side, scooting closer to you until you skins were touching and her right leg was almost over yours, even if it had plenty of space for the two of you. You didn't mind though, turning your neck to the side as you felt heat rushing to your cheeks. Yunjin grabbed your lyrics book, reading the song you wrote for her silently while nodding her head approvingly. "How does it goes, princess?" You blinked at her, not fully understanding her intensions until she looked at you again and grinning playfully. "What? We did always composed the best together."

You smiled shyly, taking a deep breath and wiggling your shoulders to release tension before bringing your fingers to the piano keys for the billionth time that night, pressing the down as you began to sing softly. "Walk in your rainbow paradise..." You turned to look at Yunjin, eyes falling to her pretty lips as the words spilled from your own lips. "Strawberry lipstick state of mind." You quickly averted your eyes from her lips, looking up to find her intensely staring right at you. "I get so lost inside your eyes..." Your fingers stop playing for a few seconds, the next words coming out of your mouth in a bittersweet whisper. "Would you believe it?"

Yunjin smiled at your dazed face before turning her face away to read the rest of the lyrics from your book. You blinked rapidly, shaking your head lightly to snap yourself from the hypnotizing aura that Yunjin had. Her fingers brushing against yours made you turn your head back to the piano keys, her sweet voice entering your ears just seconds later.

"You don't have to say you love me, you don't have to say nothing." She looked at you, her eyes caring an emotion you couldn't quite pinpoint, but it made a familiar feeling set into your lower stomach. "You don't have to say you're mine."

"Honey, I'd walk through fire for you, just let me adore you. Oh, honey." You both began singing together, Yunjin getting the hang of the song even if it was her first time singing it. But anytime it was just the two of you in the studio, there was an undeniable connection and there was never a need for much words for you to understand each other. The feeling of her fingers brushing against yours as you played together was as familiar and easy as drinking water. "I'd walk through fire for you, just let me adore you like it's the only thing I'll ever do."

As her eyes stayed on yours, your fingers slowly came to a stop. You and Yunjin stared at each other intensely, your eyes darting down to her lips as you softly sang as a soft promise you didn't fully realize yet. "Like it's the only thing I'll ever do..."

Yunjin's hands left the keys fully, pulling you by the tights impossibly closer to her, as you now practically sat on her lap. Both of your hands held her shoulders for support as your breath became intense in expectation for what was about to happen.

One of her hands went to your cheek, while the other firmly held your hip. And for a moment, you stayed like that. Eyes never wandering further than each other's lips, hands firmly holding onto one another as tension grew around both of you.

"Jennifer." Her english name fell from your mouth in a plea, and in an instant she pulled you to her. Her lips crashed on yours in a messy but needy kiss, both of you sighing into it as your heart hammered in your chest from excitement.

Your hands pulled the hairs on the back of her neck and she groaned into your lips, her hand on your hips squeezing down hard as she tried to pull you even closer to her.

You felt her tongue asking for entrance and you tilted your head to give her more access, feeling the hand she had on your hips sliding up and inside your shirt to scratch your back. You arched towards her, breaking the kiss momentarily to sigh in pleasure. Yunjin took the opportunity to bite your lower lip, her other hand going down to the hem of out shirt, tugging impatiently.

But before things could get any more heated, the sound of the door opening made you quickly pull apart from one another in a panic.

"Do you know what time is it–" Your manager busted through the door with a familiar scolding already leaving his lips, but he immediately stopped in his tracks upon seeing the situation he walked into, eyes comically wide in shock. "Oh, girls! I'm s-so sorry!" He practically slapped his hands over his eyes, turning around and awkwardly fumbling with one hand to look for the handle of the door. "I'll leave you be–"

"No!" Yunjin pushed you fully off of her, scrambling to her feet as she ran her hands frantically over her hair. "It's okay! This–" She moves to walk towards him but stops. She doesn't look at you. Walking around the mess you made in the studio, she grabs her bag in the table you assume she must've left when she came in and you didn't hear. "I'm so sorry, manager-nim! This was a mistake." You saw her wiping her lips nervously and dread squeezed your heart hard. She wiped your kiss. "I should go."

"Yunjin–" But before you could get any more words out, Yunjin bolted past your manager and out through the door, leaving you panting and all alone wondering what the hell had just happened.

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For the next few days, Yunjin had been avoiding you like the plague. Ever since that day in the studio, she would ignore your presence unless she really couldn't and had not once looked you in the eye like she used to.

Your manager had promised he wouldn't tell a soul what he saw, but your bandmates had caught on that something had happened pretty much in the first few hours of the next day. They had all tired to talk to you both about it individually, but if Yunjin wasn't saying anything, than you weren't either.

You couldn't look at the song you were writing anymore, or even spend extra time in the studio. Everything reminded you of Yunjin and that day and it all just hurt too much. You couldn't bear the idea that you might have just lost your best friend and the love of your life. It just all felt so hopeless.

Trying to talk to her proved futile as she ran away the second you caught her alone. You didn't really know what you did wrong. I mean, you were aware she liked someone else but she made the first move. She pulled you in her lap and kissed you. And you were sure if your manager hadn't shown up, things would have escalated to way more than just kissing.

You just couldn't understand why she was being so childish. Why she was so ashamed.

The different emotions you were keeping in your chest were becoming too suffocating to bear and you were afraid you'd choke on them soon. But there was no time to think about them right now, you had a job to do and a bass to play.

Your next show was in just a few minutes and it would be a lie to say the atmosphere in the backstage wasn't heavy. You would all be usually cheering yourselves together and goofing around to destress, but right now everyone was silently in a different corner by themselves.

Yunjin was the further she could from you running some last minute adjusts with Sakura on their pedals, that you were sure was just to keep herself occupied with work so no one would question her anything again. The clear tension had been stressin Chaewon so much she was probably snapping at a poor soundcheck trainee somewhere you couldn't see. Eunchae had been by the instruments silently side-eyeing you and Yunjin since the moment you arrived at the venue, clearly disturbed by whatever was going on between you and the american guitarist. And Kazuha had just brought you a bottle of water for the third time in the last ten minutes, asking if you were doing okay every time she did so.

You honestly felt bad for your friends that this situation had been affecting them and the band so much. But it wasn't your fault Yunjin clearly didn't want to resolve anything at the moment. And not knowing the core of the problem, there was nothing you could do about it.

Luckily, the time to enter the stage had quickly arrived and the show went smoothly up until fourty minutes through it.

You had just finished playing one of the songs you wrote about Yunjin and out of instinct, you turned to look at her with a big euphoric smile on your face, only to find the girl flirting with the fans and showing off her guitar.

It was a common sight in your concerts, but this time it fueled a rage inside of you that made you grip the neck of your bass tightly.

Yunjin had time to flirt with you shamelessly since your college days. She had time to play with your fool heart time and time again so carelessly. She had time to kiss you and abandon you all alone in the studio without so much of an explanation. And then she has the audacity of avoiding you and flirting with other people in front of you as if your friendship and the kiss you two shared meant nothing? You were mad.

Fuming under your breath, your hands slapped the strings of your bass guitar before you could change your mind and the crowd's surprised screams as they recognized the song did nothing but fuel you further. You could see from the corner of your eyes Yunjin and Sakura turning to you with confused expressions. You weren't playing the song you all rehearsed from your setlist.

But you were frustrated and heartbroken from all the years pent up silently crushing on Yunjin and being lead on by her flirtatious personality. Frustrated by finally kissing the girl only to be dumped and ghosted by the one you thought was your everything. And you've finally hit your boiling point. You needed to know if there would ever be anything between you and her so you could finally try to move on. If she wanted to be childish and not listen privately, then she would listen to you now.

"The crowd has come to a halt, the birds won't sing for you anymore." You sang with deep emotion on your voice, and even if they weren't understanding anything, Sakura and Kazuha followed your lead quickly as the song began. "Not like before."

The lyrics left your vocal cords with a venom you didn't know you possessed before, the crowd becoming blurry as your eyes filled with tears that carried all the feelings weighing on your chest at the moment.

The special effects team also caught up on your sudden change of songs as the lights in the venue changed colors to a dark red and you sang your heart out as you reached the chorus, not caring about anything other than letting you emotions out with the performance.

Yunjin was your first and only love. Yunjin was one of your closest friends. Yunjin was the first thing in your mind when you woke up and the last thing in your brain before you went to sleep. Yunjin was your muse. And you were hurting too much to stay silent any longer.

When the second verse arrived, you turned to look directly at the owner of your heart, only to be surprised by finding her already staring at you with concern all over her eyes. But you wouldn't back down. If anything, her seemingly out of nowhere worry after all these days of ignorance only managed to steam you further.

Looking directly into the eyes you loved so painfully dearly, you declared the next words to her. "You know all the words to the play, but all I wanted was you to stay." The realization slowly sinking on her face as you never broke eye contact made the first tear fall from your eyes, the memories from the day of your first kiss flooding your head alongside everything else and you bittersweetly sang. "Your time is running thin, cause I'm falling through the cracks under your floor."

For a moment it was only you and Yunjin in the entire world. Only you and Yunjin, and the rift between you two. Only you and the tears furiously falling down from your eyes. Only her and the guilt in her face.

And then you turned your attention back to the crowd again, the reminder of professionalism constantly in the back of your mind as your fingers burned above the pressure you were putting on the steel strings of your bass guitar.

When the bridge arrived, you leaned closer to the mic, looking at Yunjin from the corner of your eyes as you sang to her, the crowd and yourself simultaneously. "When the story comes to an end will it be the same again? When all the king's horsemen and all the king's men, they couldn't put you back together again." The bright lights stang your teary eyes just as much as the words you were singing stang your heart. But you wouldn't stop, you refused to. Even if they hit too close for comfort. "Oh, when the story comes to an end will it be the same again to you? " And when the last part of the bridge came, you fully turned to her, singing with all the emotion you could muster while fighting back a loud sob. "When the story comes to an end will you be the same again at all? At all?"

Your hands gripped the mic and you closed your eyes as you sang the ending high notes with all of your heart, not managing to hide a sob as the song finally came to an end. The loud cheers of your fans did enough noise to hide the small sobs leaving your chest as the stage became dark to prepare for the next song.

It was hard to ignore the worried stares of your bandmates, but you managed to compose yourself enough for the last remaining twenty minutes of the show. However as soon as it ended and you entered the backstage, the nearest member had to hold you as you broke down in tears.

Kazuha let you wail in her chest all the overwhelming feelings in your heart, rubbing your back comfortly as she desperately looked around for your friends for help. She didn't know what was going on yet and she had never seen you break down like that, but she would try her best to comfort you and you were grateful for that.

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The time between the ending of the concert to the moment you arrived at the green room was confusing in your fuzzy mind. You could hear people calling your name and shouting at others, but you didn't know who or why. You could only assumed it were your members and staff, but you simply let Kazuha drag you along, not bothering by anything anymore.

That was until Kazuha dropped on the couch with you and a very familiar perfume invaded your nostrils as another pair of arms circled your shoulders. It was as if a cold bucket of water was thrown on your head and suddenly your mind felt clear enough to react.

You pulled away from Yunjin as if her touch burned, turning your neck in her direction with an outraged look.

"Pretty girl–"

"Don't you even dare, Huh Yunjin!" You got up, wishing to be as far away from the girl as possible, a shaky finger pointing at her face as the room quickly became silent.

Everyone wanted to know just what the problem between the two of you was. Or maybe it was just because you shouted at Yunjin. You realized you probably looked terrible with your makeup all smudged and ruined, your trembling body and rapid breathing. Maybe they were scared of you or for you. But all you cared about was the guitarist's pleading look in front of you.

"But–"

"Oh, so now you wanna talk?!" The shame on her face did nothing to sooth your outburst and you almost slapped the girl when she tried to hold your wrist again. "I've been trying to talk to you for days, Yunjin! Days! But now just because I'm a stupid mess you wanna play best friend?!" You motioned between you and her with your hands, sighing frustrated when all Yunjin did was look down at her feet like a kid being scolded for being caught with their hands in the cookie jar. "What about the day you abandoned me in the studio after you know what?! You just pick what days you choose to care for me and what days you wanna play with me now?!" Yunjin looked up desperately, her mouth opening and closing as she searched her brains for any good answers, but nothing she thought seemed to satisfy her as her shoulders slumped defeated.

"I'm sorry..."

"You gotta be kidding me." You sobbed into your hands, not even sure why you were screaming at Yunjin anymore. You just wanted to get out of there and out of her sight. It was unfortunate you had to leave with everyone else, including Yunjin. "Am I a joke to you?"

"Okay, what the hell happened in the studio between you two?" Chaewon stood between Yunjin and you as she stared both of you down with that same annoyed expression you were well familiar with, except this time it had much more concern than ever. "We are not leaving until you two at least give us some light on what's going on!"

"It was a mistake–" Yunjin tried to say, but hearing that same explanation again shattered your heart in multiple pieces.

"Am I that disgusting to you, Jennifer?" Your voice came out broken with hurt, sobs leaving your mouth freely again. "If I knew that would ruin our friendship I would have never–"

"That didn't ruin anything! I promise!" The guitarist tried to hold your wrist once again and this time, you let her. Quickly, gentle arms circled around you in a firm hug, as Yunjin tried her best to comfort you. "I'm sorry, princess." She shushed you, kissing your forehead a few times before she brought her mouth to your ear, whispering gently. "Do you really think that about yourself?"

"Why else would you run away?" You sobbed into her chest, tears staining the fancy jacket she was wearing. You could only hope your stylist wouldn't scold you later for ruining her clothes. "Why is it a mistake to you, then?"

"Oh, honey, no." With a care you knew only Yunjin possessed, she held your face in her hands and gently wiped your cheeks. It was at that moment that you saw she had began crying too. "I was just afraid you'd hate me after I kissed you."

Whispers and murmurs filled the silence in the room, everyone surprised at the revelation of the core of your drama with the girl. You didn't miss Kazuha's loud gasp as she kept her spot in the couch next to you, neither did you miss Eunchae's and Chaewon's flabbergasted inquiries, or Sakura's hands slapping over her mouth in shock. But all you could fully focus on were Yunjin's glassy brown orbs that stared at you with deep emotion.

"I know you like someone else, gorgeous." She whispered sadly, caressing your cheek as she gave you a sad smile. "I thought you would hate me after that."

"You're stupid." The words left your mouth before you could even think correctly about what to say, a mixture of a sob and a laugh leaving your mouth right after. Yunjin blinked confused and you just let your head fall back to get chest again, mumbling. "You're the one I like, if that wasn't obvious already, you big idiot."

"Oh..." Was the only thing that left her mouth.

And for a few seconds, you thought that was it. Everything was ruined. You and Yunjin were over. You've lost your best friend. You've lost the love of your life. You've lost your muse.

Then you tried to wiggle away from her arms, feeling embarrassed and self conscious about your failed confession to the guitarist. But Yunjin tightened the hold she had on you, thus preventing you from escaping her. Before you could question her or try to scape again, she began laughing.

"Gosh! I am stupid, honey. You're right about that!" You gathered the courage to pull back slightly, now being your turn to look at her with confusion as she kept on laughing. "But I guess that makes you stupid too, pretty girl."

"What–"

"I like you too, baby." Your eyes widened at the revelation, a shocked sob leaving your throat as Yunjin grinned widely at you. "If that wasn't obvious already." She mimicked your words with a teasing tone, caressing your cheeks before gently squeezing them.

"Oh..."

"Finally!" Eunchae's excited scream served to remind you that there were plenty of other people in the room with you two, the younger girl launching herself on top of both of you in a messy hug. "I'm so happy!"

"I'm glad you both realize you're two stupid morons!" Chaewon's celebration didn't carry the same tone as Eunchae's, but it brought the same warmth and laughter to you and Yunjin. "Because you are! And much more!"

"Chaewon!" Sakura scolded your keyboardist, pushing the girl aside to stand of the three of you on the floor. "I'm glad everything is fine now." You knew her relieved smiled meant more than it did at first glance. The rift between you and Yunjin for the past few days had affected the band just as much as you two individually. And now that everything was somewhat resolved, you couldn't wait for your next show.

"As someone who has been here since the beginning." Kazuha's sobs were not something you were expecting out of this whole situation. But as she kneeled down and tried her best to hug three people with her only two arms, Yunjin and you had the same sympathetic reaction to laugh and pull apart from one another to hug the drummer. "I'm so happy you're finally over the kiss and confess part. It's been so many years!" She sobbed into your arms, laughing at her own crying.

"As much as I love you all and I'm glad those babies confessed, can we get up and go home?" Chaewon approached with a more calm tone, not being able to hide her own smile as she stared down at the four of you. "I think we all need to rest right now."

"Oh, yeah. Definitely!" After taking some minutes to compose yourselves, you all got up and began gathering your belongings to finally leave the venue, the atmosphere around your band much less tense as you talked and laughed on the way to the van.

"Oh! I forgot to say something!" Chaewon spoke the moment the door of the van closed, turning to look at the five of you as she sat in the passenger's seat. "While we're at the dorm, no se–"

"Chaewon!"

                               🎸⋆⭒˚｡⋆

"Have you ever thought about dying your hair red?" Yunjin mumbled against your shoulder as she mindlessly played with your hair strands.

"Yeah, maybe." She mumbled, leaning down to give you a peck on your lips before dropping your hair to pull you closer to her by your abdomen. "You'd look really good with it, babe."

"What?" You looked up at her from your laid position on her bed confused, but she looked serious. She was proped on her elbow behind you wearing an oversized shirt she got from your closet, that looked extremely cute on her. "Like yours?"

"Doesn't that go against the whole 'redhead x literally any other hair color' concept, though?" You turned around in her arms, drawing random circles on her back as you looked her in the eyes.

"Does it matter?" She pouted, going back to playing with your hair as she looked deep in thought. "I just think it'd be really funny though." She shrugged, scratching your scalp gently.

"Funny how?" You pressed a kiss to her jaw, not failing to noticed how she suppressed a giggle.

"Just funny, no specific reason." She mumbled, shrugging her shoulders again. You squinted your eyes and watched her face, trying to figure out what she was hiding from you. "Red is kinda of our color too."

"Right..." You watched to see if she would say anything else, but she didn't budge. So you decided to drop your suspicions for now. "If you go back to blonde, maybe then we can think about it." You leaned up to kiss the pout off her lips, bringing a hand to hold her chin and gently pry her gaze back to you. "Why are you so caught on this anyways? You don't like my hair now?"

"I love your hair!" Suddenly, she pressed you down on the mattress, propping herself with two hands on top of you as she spoke between pecks on your lips. "I. Absolutely. Love. Everything. About. You. Specially. Your. Beautiful. Hair."

"Okay, okay! I get it!" You giggled, pulling her flush against you and kissing her deeply, sighing in content before you pulled away. "I love you too, Jen."

"Jen?" She leaned on her hand to look at you better, whining in a way you'd almost laugh if you didn't truly know her. You wonder what your fans would think if they saw the big hottie guitarist from The Seraphims acting like this. But you loved it, so you'd never complain. "No baby? No sugarbum? No love of my life?"

A laugh left your chest loudly and you closed your eyes as you could contain it. Yunjin whined annoyedly again, and you had to put a hand on your chest to contain yourself.

You really loved Huh Yunjin.

Spinning the two of you around, you straddled her hips as you leaned down and let your lips hover over hers, not quite touching yet. "When you officially ask me to be your girlfriend I'll call you whatever you want, Jennifer." You grinned at her, pulling away when she tried to lean up and capture your lips. Before she could pull you down again, you left her lap and jumped off the bed, looking over your shoulder. "Come on, Jennifer. We have rehearsals in thirty minutes." You let her name roll on your tongue, laughing and running out of the her bedroom when she tried to chase after you.

                               🎸⋆⭒˚｡⋆

You bursted through the reunion room with a big smile on your face, your lyrics book and a pendrive tightly held to your chest. "Good morning, everyone!"

"Someone looks happy." Kazuha said amused as she watched you walk around the rectangular table in the reunion room to set your things down at the short edge of it.

"You mean someone looks like they didn't get a single hour of sleep last night." Sakura mumbled, taking a large sip of her coffee as the early hours had her half asleep still.

"Details, Kkura. Those are simply details." Your words only served as a confirmation of what they already suspected was true the moment you walked in with those two objects in hand.

"Did you really pull an all nighter again?" Your manager tiredly rubbed his forehead as he averted his eyes between your familiar big smile and the pendrive on the table.

"Maybe." You mumbled, not being phased by their accusations as you joyfully opened the laptop and began setting things up for the reunion.

"Why didn't you go check the studio like usually?" Chaewon's morning mood choose it's first victim as she turned to your manager with a sour face. "Festival season is in five days, we need our sleep."

"I wasn't about to risk my mental health by walking in on those two again, now that they've made up." Your manager trembled under the memory of catching you and Yunjin making out before everything else unfolded. You could only give him a sympathetic look as Eunchae and the mentioned girl walking through the door with three bags on their hands.

"Makes sense." Sakura patted the man's back, nodding her head with a tight grin, probably imagining the scene he saw.

"We brought food!" Eunchae announced happily, pulling out delicious looking sandwiches from the bags and handing one to each of the people in the room.

"Morning, sweetcheeks." Yunjin gave you a peck on your cheeks as she passed through you, a big smile adorning her lips as she looked down at the pendrive you connected to the laptop. She already knew what it was.

"Okay, so!" You clapped once loudly, gaining the attention of your friends, and some complains from the oldest ones, before motioning to the laptop in front of you proudly. "I just finished the demo of our new biggest hit!"

"Can we finally play it in a show now?" The new information seemed to lessen Chaewon's mood as she leaned on the table with interest. "The first festival is soon."

"Yes, we can!" You told her, giving the girl a thumbs up as a confirmation of your words. "It's so good it might become our best concert so far!"

"So good it's Grammys worthy?" Eunchae asked playfully as she munched down on her own food, but her eyes sparkled with excitement as you confidently nodded your head.

"Come on! Play it for us!" You giggled at Kazuha's impatience, but complied anyways, being impatient yourself to show them your new song.

"It's called Adore You, and I hope you all like it!" As you opened the audio player and clicked on play, your turned to watch Yunjin briefly. The two of you shared warm smiles as the lyrics of the song that meant so much for the both of you now began playing for your friends. Soon, that would be the symbol of your love to the world.

                               🎸⋆⭒˚｡⋆

The buzzing feeling the excited crowd gave you was never something you'd get tired of. The hot summer air had sweat dripping down your back and your chest heaving rapidly, but their cheers and them singing alone gave you all the energy you needed to go through an entire show with ease.

The sound of Sakura's ending pentatonic riff as your last song finished prompted you to look at your band in euphoria, finding them with expressions that held the same feeling as they looked over to the crowd.

"I hope you're not tired yet because we have two more songs to play tonight!" Yunjin's joy filled voice moved your attention towards her, giggling as you could hear some fangirls and fanboys losing their mind simply over her speaking. "I guess you guys still have energy left, so I want everyone to take their phones out! Come on! Everyone!"

Like stars in the night, the vast sea of people began being illuminated by balls of light all across. You stared at the sight in awe, your chest pounding from the adrenaline it gave you.

"You'll really like to record this, by the way." Chaewon spoke into her mic with a giggle. You turned to her confused, only to find four pairs of eyes staring at you with teasing smiles. You were about to question the closest member to you, Eunchae, when Yunjin's next words had you whipping your head in her direction.

"And I would like to dedicate this next song to our beautiful bassist." Yunjin extended her arms in your direction, giving you a flirtatious smile before blowing you a kiss, leaving you confused and flustered. "Babe, this is me making this official, my sorry for being so dense and my promise to love you forever."

You opened your mouth to say something, anything, but you found yourself in lost of words as Yunjin's victorious smile blinded you and your fan's impossibly louder screams made your ears ring.

"Red, red desert heal our blues. I dive deeper for you." You missed your cue as Yunjin and the others began singing, blinking dumbfoundedly at her. "What a blessing to feel your love. Twilight moments with you." She blew you another kiss before her hands went down to her guitar, prompting you to snap out of your surprise and quickly begin playing your own instrument.

You quickly looked over at the crowd, silently asking if they were seeing the same thing as you, before turning to the american again. I guess you now knew why she wanted for you to dye your hair red, it would indeed be funny.

"I've been asleep so long, I'm so far away." As Yunjin sang directly at you, not one moment looking away, you could feel the deep meaning behind them and the irony of it all. It made you smile lovingly at her. "Visions I see are strong, I hear what they say." Her loving gaze made you have a realization as words she said before passed through your mind again. This was Yunjin asking you to be her girlfriend, in the only way that would be right for the two of you. "Won't you leave all your fears at the edge of the world? I’ll tell you again like I told you before. I've been asleep so long, wasting away." She looked more serious as she sang the next words. "Tell me, would you pack up all your bags, stay true to North?" And you'd definitely say yes to that. Nodding your head rather rapidly, she gave you a short smile, understanding just exactly what you meant. "You're the only one I'd do this for." She motioned to the crowd with her head, blinking playfully at you as the second chorus began, her eyes not leaving you in any moment.

You didn't approach your mic and your girlfriend and the other girls sang the chorus. Instead, you slowly approached Yunjin, minding not to trip on any cables and ruin the moment.

Your girlfriend looked surprised for the first time in the night as her flirting gaze dropped momentarily, carefully watching as you stood right in front of her, the only thing separating the two of you being your instruments and her mic. You gave her a sly grin as you brought your lips close to her mic, singing the next lyrics looking directly into her eyes.

"It doesn't take too long to heal and replace." It felt like you and Yunjin had entered a bubble of your own, a vermilion ball of emotions enveloping the two of you in a drizzling love confession. "The demons we're running from, they're begging to stay."

You two sang the pre-chorus in unison, a smile growing on both of your faces as the lyrics went on. The happiness in your bandmates voices was, too, audible to you as this time, the six of you joined to sing the chorus.

The crowd's flashlights managed to enlighten the featured of Yunjin's face and in that moment, the guitarist was the most beautiful you had even seen.

When the bridge arrived, you brought your instruments closer together as you played the riffs with excitement. It was felt like you two were flirting through your bass and guitar, and you assumed it probably looked the same. Yunjin looked up to your eyes with a joyful grin. "I adore you." She confessed, playing with the words of the song you would sing in just a few minutes.

"I adore you too, baby." Her smile grew impossibly larger and you could recognize the prideful sparkle in her eyes, making you giggle lightly.

When the song finally came to an end, you barely had any moment to catch your breath as Yunjin pulled the neck of your bass down with one hand and grabbed the lapel of your jacket and pulled you into her, crashing her lips onto yours in a heated passionate kiss.

She let you go briefly, smiling widely at the fans loosing their minds and your deep breaths, pulling again for another kiss, a gentler one this time, but just as passionate.

_________________________________________

"Ready for another song, baby girl?" She mumbled against your lips after pulling away again, a teasing grin adorning her own lips.

"Oh, yeah."

a/n: this was just me shuffling through my pop/rock playlist and picking the songs I liked the most lol, which is why you can tell the angst was not initially planned and the some parts were a bit rushed cause I suck at angst but it's okay I guess hahahajdjsjk

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thank you so much for reading!! <3

[golden-cherry]

deal - cl16 (22/?)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.

Chapter Summary: This friendship is off to a great start. Or something like that.

Warnings: fluff, fluff, fluff because you all deserve it, tiny but of angst (because it wouldn't be my work if there wasn't angst in it), google translated French

Word Count: 2.9k

series masterlist

previous part

A/N: tadaaaaaa. did my best and I hopefully have time to update this story weekly. feedback is appreciated!

The other side of the bed is empty when you open your eyes. 

Sunlight beams through the window and warms your face as you stretch your arms and lie back. A loud yawn escapes your mouth, but you are so well rested and relaxed that you don't care who can hear you. 

Charles is probably hanging around the apartment somewhere and you can't help but smile at the thought of him. 

You didn't expect you two to talk so soon, but now that the weight is off your shoulders and the secrets - both your unemployment and the Formula One thing - are out in the open, you feel a lot better. You slept well, snuggled up to Charles with his arm wrapped tightly around your middle. His warmth gave you security and comfort and although the road to this moment has been quite bumpy and rocky, you're glad you've finally arrived at this point. 

Pure friendship. 

It's the right thing to do, you tell yourself. This friendship is more important than anything else in this world. I'll be damned if I'm going to destroy the only good thing I have.

You lock your feelings deep inside you, bury them under many and thick layers of friendly affection so that no daylight can reach them. What remains inside you is silence, a pleasant, comforting silence. 

You don't have to worry about what his pet names mean to you. You don't have to worry about eventualities that will certainly not become reality anyway. You can be there for Charles, as a friend - as someone who is there for him. 

You swing your legs over the edge of the bed and stand up. There are some fresh clothes for you on a small chest of drawers - a turquoise shirt and short gray Puma sports shorts - which you quickly slip into. As you open the door to your room, the smell of batter fills your nose. 

"Bonjour," Charles smiles at you as you enter the spacious, modern kitchen and sit down opposite him at the kitchen counter. Unlike last night, this time he's wearing a shirt and gray sweatpants, which hang low on his hips but still let you feel a little sigh of relief. With spatula in hand, he scrapes the pancake out of the pan to put it on a plate and slide it over to you. "How did you sleep?"

"Very well," you answer him and reach for the Nutella that is already in front of you. "And you?"

"Likewise." He turns off the stove and sits down next to you with another plate of pancakes. His knee nudges yours, but neither of you pulls your leg away. "The recipe is from my teammate. He says they're the best pancakes ever and I thought we could try them together."

As you spread the Nutella evenly on your pancake, you hand him the jar. His fingertips gently brush your hand. "So if they don't taste good, it's not your fault?" you grin and use your knife and fork to cut off a small piece before popping it into your mouth. 

Charles watches your every move. "That's right. So? Did he lie?"

You shake your head. The pancake in your mouth is warm and soft and fluffy, vanilla is definitely one of the ingredients and as you swallow the piece, a little of the delicious taste remains. "It's really delicious," you reply and spear another piece with your fork. "But I think it's also down to how the pancakes are made. The batter can be as good as it wants to be, but if it's made incorrectly - nope. Then it can't be saved."

Your Monegasque friend pours a little orange juice into the empty glass in front of you. "Was that a compliment to the chef?" A grin spreads across his face and he waggles his eyebrows. 

You playfully punch him in the shoulder with your fist. He pretends to almost fall off his chair. "My statement is to be considered purely objective."

Something flashes in Charles' green eyes, but before you can pinpoint it, he turns his gaze back to the breakfast. "I've heard you say that before," he mumbles before taking a bite. "But it really tastes great. I'll have to tell him when I see him again soon."

"What does your nutritionist say about you smearing so much Nutella on your pancake?" When he puts his index finger to his mouth, you have to smile. "Do you have to go back? To Italy?" The thought of Charles leaving you alone here in this big apartment makes you swallow hard. You only really talked to each other a few hours ago, does he really have to -

"No," he unintentionally interrupts your train of thought. "I don't think they want to see me there again so soon after I left yesterday. But that's just the way it is." He shrugs his shoulders. "More time for us." Before you can ponder the meaning of that sentence, he continues. "I know we've already talked this morning about what to do next, but I think we should discuss it again."

You raise an eyebrow in confusion. "What do you mean?"

The brunette purses his lips. "You said that you still want to be friends with me despite my job - and I think that's great - but you should really be sure."

"I am sure," you reply without hesitation.

"But you have to know what all this would mean for you if you take this," he points first to you and then to himself, "on. Dealing with all this is more difficult than you can imagine."

"All right," you reply, shoving the last piece of pancake into your mouth before washing it down with orange juice. "Go on then, Mr. Charles Leclerc."

He looks at you with a look that can't mean anything other than "Really?" before clearing his throat. "I've been in the public eye since I was little. It used to be karting, now it's Formula One. I'm used to people recognizing me, approaching me on the street and wanting to take photos. It's normal everyday life for me."

"Sounds a bit conceited," you joke, but Charles' expression suggests he's not in the mood for fun. "Okay. Je suis désolé."

"As soon as I leave the house, people talk about it. What I'm doing. Where I'm going. Who I'm spending time with. And my friends are set on the fact that when we're out and about, we can never be fully undisturbed." He chews on his lower lip for a moment. "With my female friends, things are a little more complicated."

"Meaning?"

He takes a deep breath. "As a Formula One driver, it's quite difficult to maintain friendships with the opposite sex. As soon as you do something together without anyone else around, it's portrayed as a date in the press or on social media. According to TikTok, I've had four new girlfriends since Annika and I split up. But nobody cares that they are the wives and girlfriends of my best friends. People see what they want to see. Even if it doesn't reflect the truth at all."

Without hesitation, you reach for his hand and stroke the back of it with your thumb. His skin is soft. "I'm terribly sorry about that. It must be awful."

Charles turns his hand a little so you can intertwine your fingers. "It's nothing new for me. It's more difficult for my friends. They are insulted, called names, judged. And all because they want to spend time with me, because that's what friends do. It's not fair. Not for anyone."

Now you understand why it's so important to Charles that you know this. His friendship has a price. And from what he tells you, it's not exactly cheap.

"The pressure on you would be huge. People will have opinions about you that you won't like. And no matter what you do, no matter how good you are - you won't be able to change them. And at some point, you'll be approached on the street without me, just because we're friends. The first time Joris was asked for a photo, he was completely taken aback."

You can see how much this is taking its toll on him and you don't even want to know how many friendships his name has already cost him. It's understandable that not everyone wants to take this risk, this life.

You squeeze his hand twice to attract his attention. When he looks at you, you smile. "Doesn't sound so bad," you try to cheer him up. The attempt fails miserably.

"I don't think you understand me." He shakes his head slightly and removes his hand from yours. "That's no small sacrifice. And there's no turning back once you do. You'll have no privacy once you leave this apartment. You'll be the talk of the town. About what you do, what you say and what clothes you wear. And all because we're friends."

You raise an eyebrow. "And what's in it for me then?"

He lowers his eyes again. His voice is quiet. "Just - me."

Your heart breaks for him. 

How can he not know how wonderful he is? Ever since you've known each other, Charles has always given you the chance to get out of things. He's let you have the bed, driven your rickety Renault to protect you from the public, pushed you away - disgustingly, but still. And all so that you could have a choice. 

You'd like to take him in your arms and hug him tightly, hoping you can patch up his shattered parts. And so you do. You get up from the chair and wrap your arms around him so tightly that he gasps in surprise. He slides off his chair into a firm stance so that your hands slide a little lower down his back. A moment later, when you feel one of his hands on your spine and the other in your hair, you press your cheek against his hard chest.

"I wish you could see yourself the way I do," you murmur against the soft fabric of his shirt, whereupon he presses you a little closer to him. 

"How do you see me?" he whispers against the top of your head. You feel his lips on your scalp. "Like a crazy, jealous guy who shows up at your place in the middle of the night and starts a fight with your ex?"

"You're an idiot." You lift your face from his chest and tilt your head back so you can look at him. He looks down at you. "You're such a wonderful person, Charles. And I would be honored if you wanted me as a friend."

"Are you really sure?" His warm breath brushes over your face. "There's so much you -"

"I'm sure," you interrupt him. 

"There's a series on Netflix you can watch so you can get a better understanding of -"

"I'm sure."

"Y/N, please -"

"Don't you want to be my friend?" You want to take a step backwards so you can really look at him, but he's so comfortably warm and his gaze is so heartbreaking that you don't want to let him go under any circumstances. 

"I want nothing more than that. Really." The hand that was in your hair a moment ago rests against your cheek and your thumb strokes it gently. "But there's so much you have to give up. And just for me."

You nestle your face against his warm skin. "You're all I have. And that's all I need."

His gaze softens and he gently kisses your forehead before holding you close one last time and then letting go. "The Netflix series isn't that good anyway. It doesn't reflect what really happens on race weekends." He sits back down at the counter and grabs another pancake. 

You join him. "I'm not surprised. Netflix will do anything to make money and twisting reality to make it more marketable is nothing new." You copy him with the pancake.

"Exactly. And if you want to know anything, you can ask me. Your friend - the Formula One driver," he grins, shoving a bite between his two jaws. 

"You said yesterday that this season has been a throwaway. What do you mean?" you ask him, emptying the bottle of orange juice into your glasses. 

Charles shrugs his shoulders. "The car and the strategies didn't work as they should have. The Scuderia made more cock-ups than you can stand."

You have to suppress a grin. "Then wouldn't it be smarter to call it the Screwderia?"

His gaze is emotionless as you look at him. "That's the worst joke I've ever heard." He smirks. "But you're right about that."

It's obvious that your friend feels a lot more comfortable now that he's told you the truth. The passion with which he talks about the sport is infectious, and you listen to him as attentively as you can. There's a sparkle in his eyes, his smile almost reaches your ears as he talks about his victories and podiums. 

How could you not want to be friends with him?

When you're done with breakfast, Charles sends you to explore the apartment while he does the dishes. After brushing your teeth and getting a bit more ready - you keep your clothes on, they're comfortable and Charles' after all - you wander through the rooms. 

The living room is kept simple, with white furniture and a comfortable-looking couch where you can watch the second part of Cars. Next to it on a shelf are several trophies and even helmets, which you take a quick look at.

There's even a white piano. A red rose arrangement with the word Love is placed on it. As you run your fingers over the wood of the instrument, you hear Charles enter the room. 

"The roses are from Annika. They're not real, so they can stay longer." He steps from one foot to the other. 

"Why haven't you thrown them away yet?" you ask him as you turn to face him. 

He shrugs his shoulders. "I haven't gotten around to it yet. And Annika was still living here until yesterday. So..."

You nod weakly and change the subject. "Have you been practicing here?"

"Yes. Unfortunately, I don't have much time to play because of Formula One. It was good to play in the bookshop. Even if it was completely improvised."

You remember every single note. The passion he poured into the keys to create an incredibly beautiful piece of music. The passion he felt. How beautiful he looked in the warm light. "It was beautiful. It really was."

"It's your song." He smiles lovingly. "It's as beautiful as you are."

Like magnets, you move towards each other. As he holds out his hand, you place yours in it so that he can gently turn you in a circle before pulling you close. Your hands rest on your chest and you feel his strong heartbeat under your fingertips as you smooth down his shirt. His hands are on your lower back, pressing you against him so that you arch towards him. 

"Charles."

"Mm-hmm." His gaze flickers back and forth between your eyes and your lips, making your heart beat faster. 

You hypocrite, you hear your conscience say as your one hand slides to the nape of his neck and plays with the fine hair there. Charles closes his eyes and something you can only categorize as a moan escapes his throat. 

"Please don't stop," he whispers and leans his forehead against yours. The tips of your noses nudge against each other. 

"With what?" you ask softly, even though you know exactly what he means. 

"Touching me." His voice sounds almost like a deep groan. "Tu me fais tellement de bien.“ you feel so good.

You would never stop. It seems like an invisible boundary was torn down last night and you haven't been able to stop touching each other since. His knee against yours at breakfast. Your embrace. Your half-naked bodies pressed together a few hours ago when you were talking. 

Even if you wanted to, you couldn't stop touching him. 

Hypocrite, repeats the annoying voice in your head. 

Without thinking about it, you arch towards him another inch and Charles draws in a sharp breath. 

"Charles?" A woman's voice sounds from the hallway and the Monegasque opens his eyes. „Chéri, tu es à la maison?“ darling, are you home?

Your eyes search his as he suddenly breaks away from you and takes a step back. Panic is practically written all over his face. 

"Who's that?" you ask silently, but get no answer.

The footsteps from the hallway come closer and when you turn around, a woman is standing in front of you, looking first at you and then at Charles before her gaze lingers on you. "'Qui avons-nous là?“ who do we have here? she asks, walking towards you before grabbing your hands and giving you a kiss on the left cheek, then the right. 

"Maman, que fais-tu ici?" mom, what are you doing here? Charles asks hesitantly, taking a step towards you both. 

Maman?

next part

[obiwanwhat]

So I firmly believe that everything Anakin did and said wasn't about him and what he needed to say, it was about what Ahsoka needed to hear and see.

There is so much to unpack within EVERYTHING of that episode but here's my attempt at trying to deconstruct the latter half of the Anakin & Ahsoka scenes:

"Ahsoka, within you will be everything I am"

For 15 years, Ahsoka thought that Anakin had died a Jedi. From the time she was 17 to the time she was 32 - it was a belief she held for her entire adult life! Her training as a Jedi was foundational to who she was (even if she wasn't a Jedi), and being trained by Anakin was the core of her Jedi training. For over a decade, she looked at that inheritance with nothing but pride over who had trained her and where she'd come from. And then she finds out what Anakin became. Obviously it's devastating to see someone who you consider family in the state, and to have them try to kill you! But the thing I'd never considered was how much it would make Ahsoka doubt herself. If Anakin trained Ahsoka - and you can bet she's now going over every memory of Anakin she ever has searching for double meanings, searching for signs of what he would become - what does that make her? What does that say about her training, and about all the lessons that shaped her?

"But my part of that legacy is one of death and war"

On top of that...Ahsoka has been a soldier and then a spy since she was fourteen. She was a literal child soldier! She was trained in nothing but killing and war, and then later had to train herself in killing and spying. Without a war to fight, who is she? Now that peace has (apparently) returned to the galaxy with the end of the Empire, what place does she have? What purpose does she serve? What knowledge of use does she have to pass onto Sabine?

"But you're more than that, because I'm more than that"

This isn't Anakin trying to defend himself, he's pointing out that to Ahsoka he means more than the death he caused, both as Jedi soldier and as Darth Vader. When he trained her, he didn't just teach her how to kill - he taught her how to respect and care about the men under her command, he taught her how to be brave in the face of insurmountable odds, he taught her how to be kind to the innocent. Clone Wars Anakin was just as much a Jedi as he was a solider, and so both trainings are what were passed down to Ahsoka. And his becoming Vader doesn't undo any of that. I don't think Ahsoka had ever figured out how to feel about Anakin's legacy, because how can she respect the man who became a genocidal monster? How can she respect and love and honor the man who tried to kill her? She should - well, not hate him, a Jedi (or even a not-Jedi) doesn't hate - but she should disavow him. But she can't, because he's still the man who stood up for her when the Jedi Council turned their backs on her, who drilled her in the lightsaber techniques that saved her life on Mandalore, who saved her life too many times to count and was her family. And she doesn't know how to reconcile those feelings with what Anakin became, and therefore she doesn't know how to reconcile the parts of herself that come from being trained by Anakin.

"You are more, Anakin. But more powerful and dangerous than anyone realized"

She's sidestepping the point by falling back on her default defense: Anakin fell to the Dark Side, and therefore everything that came out of his teachings - including her - is tainted. She still can't admit to herself that there was more to Anakin than his fall, and that all those parts of Anakin still mean something to her.

"Is that was this is about?" / "If I am everything you are-" / "then you've learned nothing"

She's still missing the point Anakin's trying to show her - that she carries his trainings and influence within her, but she is not Anakin. She is not tainted by Anakin's fall, and her fate will not be the same as his, because she's her own person who makes her own choices, and the good in Anakin's teachings - the good in her that came from them - doesn't just go away because Anakin fell. She's still so scared of Anakin's darkness - and what it says about her own inner darkness - that she can't see her own light.

"Back to the beginning. I gave you a choice - live, or die?"

For the last 10 or so years (however long since she returned from Malchor), Ahsoka's been in a holding pattern. All she knows is war, and she doesn't know what there is to life outside of fighting to live another day. She's terrified of who she is and of facing the ghost of Vader over her past. She's not living anymore, she's just surviving, moving from day to day. Anakin's telling her that's not enough anymore. Not being able to face her past and embrace her training literally killed her - Baylan was able to unbalance her enough to defeat her in a fight by stoking her inner discord. If she wants to return, she has to want to live, really live - she needs to find her direction in life beyond being a solider, and to do that she has to embrace her full legacy and training. If she can't do that, then she'll stay dead, stuck in the world between worlds.

"No-" / "Incorrect" / "You lack conviction" / "Time to die"

She still doesn't know how to see past Vader, so Anakin give her the opportunity to work through it in a way she can understand - by literally fighting her figurative demon.

"I choose to live"

By fighting Vader, by having the chance to kill him and embrace the Dark Side and realizing she didn't take it, realizing that she never even wanted to, Ahsoka finally realizes what Anakin's been trying to show her - she's not Vader, she never will be, because that's not who she is. Anakin's teachings are a part of her that she cannot escape, but there is more to Anakin's teachings than Vader, and there is more to her than what she has been taught. To find out what she is meant to be and move forward she must embrace where she came from. Only then can she return to the world of the living and move forward with her journey.

[smuthospital]

⭐️Yandere Gojo x reader⭐️

Premise: You're so lonely, and your boyfriend isn't paying any attention to you, so you download an app to make friends. You meet the wrong guy (Gojo), and bad things happen.

Content warning: NON CON, Cheating, gn reader

MINORS DNI

"I'm busy right now and you know that. I told you not to call me!" The phone beeps and the call ends, leaving you alone in deafening silence. Your boyfriend has always been rough around the edges, but you love him despite his flaws. He has his moments that remind you why you like him so much. Lately, he's been busy with all sorts of things. Work, family, his hobbies. You live together, but he's always out. He doesn't even return at night sometimes. You understand he needs his alone time, but it's been so long since you've seen him. You called to ask if you could visit him at work and give him a little surprise. You baked him chocolate chip cookies! They're delicious and made with love. Tears prick your eyes as you toss your phone to the side. You're so lonely. You've never had many friends, just your boyfriend. Too many people just make you tired.

You pick up your phone and almost call him again out of reflex. You just wish you had someone to talk to again. You saw an advertisement for a popular friend making app awhile ago. You decide to download it because you don't have much to lose. search it up. You write a few things about yourself, add your favorite song as well as a few pictures of yourself. You cross your fingers, hoping not to match any creeps. You swipe right on a lot of girls aswell as guys. You stated in your bio that you're in a commited relationship to ward off any horny guys. Girls don't reply to you, much to your disappointment. You end up getting quite a lot of messages from flirty guys. The relationship warning seemed to have no affect at all.

Toji: How much for a pair of pantys?

Sukuna: (Sent a photo) *Blocked*

Todo: I know it grips. Please lemme hit

25 new messages!

Geez. It's only been an hour. These guys are like hungry raccoons and you feel like a can of cat food. You scroll through and see one that looks relatively innocent

Gojo: Hey :)

You: Hello!

Gojo: What's up? I saw that you have a cat! They're so cute! Also, you're gorgeous

You: Thank you! That's my lil baby right there

You and him quickly get along. Still no word from your boyfriend, you sigh, defeated. The cookies can wait. You tell him about your boyfriend and how you never see him that much anymore. Be seems to take interest in this and becomes quite upset that you're not treated with the love you deserve. You friendship goes on for a few days. He occasionally trys to flirt with you, but you quickly shut it down each time, politely asking him to respect your boundaries. His nickname for you is gorgeous and although it makes you a bit uncomfortable, it feels too good to hear for you to ask him to stop. He's your only friend at the moment so you really don't want to make him go away.

You: Still no reply from my boyfriend. I hope he's okay.

Gojo: What the fuck. If I had a girl like you, I'd never leave her alone. He's probably cheating

You: What? He'd never. He's not like that!

Gojo: Trust me, I'm a guy, I know. Just look at the way he treats you. You're such a sweet and polite doll and he's making you feel this way, neglecting you. He makes you feel like shit. This is abuse😡

You: Oh it's really not like that, he's really sweet!

Gojo: There you go again...I can treat you better. Just give me one chance. Nobody has to know. You can leave this abusive relationship.

You: We talked about this, I'm have a boyfriend and I love him. Don't say stuff like that, please

Gojo: I'm just sayin

You: Thank you tho, it's sweet that you care. Do you like cookies? I was saving these for my boyfriend, but he's too busy to receive them. They'll go to waste if they're not eaten

Gojo: YES. SEND THE COOKIES. You wanna come over tomorrow? I know you're free. Come to my place, we can watch movies and cuddle with cookies!

You: What!? I can't go over to a guy's house! That's weird! And cuddle!?

Gojo: Nono it's not. We're just friends. And your boyfriend doesn't have to know. It's not a big deal. I have some old wine we can drink. Pretty please

You: I don't drink tho. I'm not sure. I haven't known you for too long. What if you try to take my kidneys! :0

Gojo: Common..would I do that!?? Ridiculous. Don't over think it. Let's watch a scary movie. It'll be real scary. I can't watch it alone! Pleeeeaaase!!!

You: ...Ok...as long as its scary. I wouldn't want you to get too scared

You've never seen Gojo in person, but you're sort of desperate to keep him around as a friend. In his photos, his eyes are covered. You don't question why. You step off the bus at the address he texted you, cookie basket in hand. It's a tall, expensive looking condo. You walk into the nice building and spot him leaning against a wall you in the lobby. He's not what you expected at all. You've seen a pictures of him before, but he didn't look so large and intimidating. He's stupid tall and He practically towers over your frame. He crouches slightly and wraps his arms around you in a tight hug, surprising you with the sudden contact.

"Hey, (y/n)! It's nice to see you in person! You're so much more sexy up close." His voice as soft satin sheets and deep and melodic as a cat purring. He eyes you up and down, his eyes half lidded. He's snapped out of his trance when you stutter a confused thank you. You're gonna brush that flirt off as nothing. "Common, let's go." He takes your soft, smaller hand in his ridiculously big hand and leads you to a fancy elevator and sticks a key into a key hole, confusing you. Since when do elevators do that? "The 21sr floor is mine." The whole floor is his? Is he loaded?

The whole time, you're blushing and stuttering, overly shy and nervous. 'Play it cool,(y/n)!' Your mind is over heating and he thinks it's absolutely adorable. When you get to his floor, he closes the door and silently locks it behind him. He plops on the couch, spreads his long legs out and patts the spot next to him. "Common! Take a seat!" You gingerly take a seat a little too far for his liking so he loops an arm around your waist and pulls you closer. You jump a bit. "Oh don't be shy! I don't bite." The last part of his sentence stood out to you a bit, but you're not sure why.

He offers you a drink and you accept. He hands you a cup of soda. "The conjuring is a classic. I actually haven't seen it before so I thought we could watch it." With that, he presses play and the movie starts. You're both eating the cookies you made. "These are so fucking good. You made these?" He whispers and you nod. Your blushing cheeks are so cute. He's already eaten three. It's heartwarming. Halfway into the movie, he shuffles in his seat and surprises you by picking you up and placing you on his lap with ease. "Hey! What are you doing!?" You try to slide off, but he holds you in place. "Hey hey calm down, I'm not doing anything!" You stop thrashing, but don't stop struggling. "Oh yeah!? Let me off, you said no funny buissness!" You feel slightly tired for some reason. "I'm only trying to cuddle you better! If not for me, then for you. I bet you miss being cuddled. I know you already have a boyfriend so don't worry, there's nothing weird about it!" With that, you stop struggling, too worn out to argue. "...Mm ok." Near the end of the movie, he shifts slightly under you. "Gojo?" No response. You feel somthing hard under your ass. He starts to shift you back and fourth a bit. "Huh? Gojo?" He just keeps shifting you, holding your hips tightly. "Ow! You're squeezing me too tight. What are you doin-"

One of his hands snake up to your chest and cup your breast. The motion freezes you in place.

"I'm better than your stupid boyfriend. He's so ungreatful. I bet you also miss getting fucked, don't you?" It was more of a statement rather than a question.I can make you feel good, better than he ever did. God, you're so hot. This guy is such a loser for passing you up. I'd never be like him. I've been wanting for this since I first saw you. I know you think I'm attractive too. I see the way you eye me"

The hand holding down your hip moves between your thighs to cup your clit. You heart sinks into your stomach as the weight of the situation falls upon you. You have never felt more stupid in your entire life. Just as you suck in a breath to scream, the hand on your breast shoots up to cover your mouth, muffling any sound. You try to slsp his hands off, but your arms are a little weaker than before. All you could do was patt his arms and wiggle around, which he completely ignores.

"Ah ah-be good. I couldn't stop thinking of you. I've only known you for a bit, but that's enough for me." He grinds his clothed cock against your ass and groans in pleasure.

After a few minutes, he stands up with you in his arms and walks with you to his bedroom. He tosses you on his bed and immediately gets on top, holding you down with his hips as he removs his shirt. He looks down at your horrified face and licks his lips. He wastes no time in literally ripping your shirt and bra off. You hear the tear as it leaves you. With one hand, he roughly palms your chest and tweaks a nipple. He unzips his dark purple pants with his other hand, his swollen cock practically flying out and slamming down above your belly button. You gasp at the sight of it, the weight alone is hefty. Much like his entire self, it's big and scary.

Your eyes fill with tears and you do the only think you could. Your body can't possibly struggle and even if you could, he could easily over power you. "Please-please don't hurt me. Please don't do this to me!" He looks at you with sympathy in his eyes. "Shh it's ok. I'd never hurt you. I'm not like your stupid boyfriend. I'm gonna make you feel good. Then you'll be mine..I see that drug I have you fully kicked in." You pail at his words. It's over. You're not getting out of this one. You're going to be raped by this psychopath. You think of your poor boyfriend. You wish he could burst through the door and save you. His name bubbles from your mouth pathetically.

"Speaking of him." Gojo slides your phone out of your pocket and clicks around. First, he disables your location, then he raises your phone and takes a photo of you. He quickly sends it to himself and your boyfriend.

You: We're having a good time. Bet you're jealous

A few minutes of groping later, your boyfriend responds.

❤️Geto❤️: Absolutely not. You're both disgusting. I fucking knew you were whoring yourself. You got a big head because you think you're pretty. I was wondering why you were trying to look nice recently.

❤️Geto❤️: You're like a bitch in heat. You're just an easy, worthless whore. Glad I didn't waste too much on you.

❤️Geto❤️: Go fuck yourself. Or better yet, have some guy do it for free. Get aids and die, bitch. You have a day to pick up all your shit before I toss it.

(You've been blocked by this number)

Gojo turns the screen towards you and your eyes tear up as you read the texts. You have no idea how your boyfriend could have possibly interpreted your situation as consentual. It could be that you're not tied up and gagged, nor unconscious. As he said, he expected this from you. Either way, he obviously doesn't love you anymore. Tears pour down your cheeks. How could he? After all this time? To do this to you. You'd never cheat! Your heart shatters in your chest, suddenly feeling hollow.

Gojo chuckles and sets the phone to the side. He wipes your tears away with his thumb. "See? What did I tell you? He was never the one for you. I'd never say that to you, sweety. I'd never treat you like that. I just exposed him for what he is; a scum bag." He tugs your pants down and off your legs with ease, despite your light kicking. A large grin on his face as he does so

"You ready?" He positions his cock at your dry entrance and laughs. "Because I am." He shoves himself in, but only makes it three inches in before he hits a barrier and you gasp in pain and start thrashing your body. "P-please take it out. It-it hurts!" He's genuinely shocked. "Y-you're a virgin? Didn't you say you have a boyfriend?"

You wiggle a bit, trying to elevate some pain yourself before answering him.

"We never...you..know.." Your face burns with shame. His cock only seems to swell with more blood at the news.

He bursts out laughing. "This makes so much sense now! No wonder why you looked elsewhere to fulfill your needs. He doesn't want to fuck. Is he gay?Does his dick even work? Maybe he's not cheating. He didn't even fuck you once. I could tell how bad you wanted it, but your limp dick boyfriend wouldn't give you any. I'm glad to be the one to have your first time."

Your bloodshot eyes drift to the side. You don't want to admit that he was right. Every time you would try to start something with your boyfriend, he'd push you away. Your boyfriend really didn't have much of a labido, but you didn't look for friends to have sex with other men.

"I know it hurts, but you can take it. It'll go away. Just hold still...or struggle. I like a challenge." His words are evil, but his smile is so charming. He's like the devil. He pulls his cock out and thrusts in again, deeper than before, breaking your hymen and forcing the air to leave your body. He then pulls out and slams into you again, bottoming out. His cock is so big, you swear you could feel it in your stomach. You look down, eyes blown wide as you see an imprint of his cock in your lower abdomen. He lets out a loud moan and throws his head back. "You're so fucking tight." You put your hands on his chest, hoping that would be enough to keep him still. Wishful thinking. He just takes your smaller wrists in his large hands and leans over you, lodging himself deeper than he was before, cock assaulting your cervix, making your body jolt. You accidentally let out a pained cry that could be mistaken as a moan.

Gojo smiles, perfect white teeth on display "Oh, you like that?" He slams into that spot again and again, making your eyes roll into the back of your head, and your tongue rolls out of your mouth. Lewd sounds spill from your mouth with the occasional "No." "Please." and "Stop." Your sobbing dies down, not having any more tears to cry. You feel a tightening in your lower belly and curl your toes. "Nng G-Gojo!"

"Fuck yeah, say my name!" He pounds into your poor pussy with astonishing speed and strength. "Say you'll be my girlfriend. I can take care of you, I can love you. You'll never feel alone again."

Your face flushes red at his words. Those words are all you need to tip over the edge. You aren't sure if he meant it or not, but just the thought of being so loved takes you to cloud nine. A warm feeling washes over you and you cry out in pleasure. You want what he promised more than anything in the world. With your last braincell, you weigh your options. Nobody loves you, you have nowhere to go, no one to turn to and Your boyfriend kicked you out. "I...I'll be with you." What choice did you have? Be homeless?

The bashful look you give him sends shivers down his spine. He leanes down and gives you a tender kiss on the lips which you very hesitantly return, much to his enjoyment. His hot breath tickles your face as his hips hammer into you, forcing cute music from your mouth for him. Your cunt tightening impossibly around his thick mass. His pace becoming sloppy and before you could ask him to pull out, he shoves himself deep within you one last time. With a lewd moan he fills your tummy up with his seed. Your eyes cross at the warm, pleasurable sensation. The feeling of being filled up like a puff pastry, his hot creamy cum temporarly stupifying you. Your tummy now bloated by the sheer volume. He takes another picture.

He wasn't looking for a girlfriend, but how could he possibly deny himself such a sweet little thing. A sweet, doting, cookie baking girlfriend as cute as you comes as often as a shooting star. You'd do anything for the man you loved. Too wifey to pass up. Finders keepers. He's going to make sure that no one ever does to you what he just did to you. You're his now.

He rolls the two of you so he's spooning your back, your ass pressed against him, his cock still firmy lodged into your weeping cunt. He pulls the blanket up and the two of you fall asleep together. You pretty much pass out from the exhaustion.

The next morning, he drives you to your now x boyfriends appartment to collect your things. You and Gojo take the elevator to the apartment. He stays out of sight, but stays where he can hear you. You knock on the door and your Geto opens up. The smell of alcohol hits you and you gag. "Well if it isn't the slut. Get your shit."

He turns his back and begins to walk away, but you grab his arm and gently tug him toward you. "Please listen to me...he raped me...I didn't want to.. do any-" You were cut off by him shoving you to the ground roughly, your head knocking against the wall on your way down. You grunt in pain. "Don't you use that shit on me!" He shouts.

Tears fill your eyes as you scramble to collect your things and run out. Gojo is at the front door now, having heard the commotion. He steps in the apartment and grabs your shoulders.

"What's wrong? Did he touch you?"

"...I..hit my head." Your tiny voice is unconvincing.

"Take your things to the car. I'm just gonna have a quick chat with him." He pays your butt and you walk off with your things. Geto has been watching the interaction with clenched fists.

"You're the fuck that stole my girl. You can fucking have her and pass her around to whoever the fuck you want. For your information, that cunt tried to tell me you raped her, using you as her scape goat." Gojo can just barley understand the drunken shouting of your x boyfriend. Gojo smiles, the smugest of grins crossing his face.

"...That's because I did"

Geto froze in place, not believing his ears. His girlfriend..was actually just raped? And not only did he do absolutely nothing, but he kicked her out and hurt her?

"...What?" It wasn't really a question.

"Finders keepers. I have no clue why you're so upset. You didn't love her. She was so lonely when I found her. I wanted her so I took her. Make no mistake, she said no. Cried for you. You should feel like shit. Not believing your own sweet little girlfriend and then laying your hand on her in her time of need. I'm not even going to beat you for that, you'd treat yourself like a victim. Better luck next time though. Try satisfying your bitch before they're stolen. Thanks for the girlfriend." Gojo says, walking back to the car, Geto still too frozen in shock to react. He falls to his knees, clinching his head. Gojo meets you in the car, your things already in the back. He leans over to your side and gives you a passionate kiss on the lips, tongue diving into your mouth. Your face burns brightly and you cant help but kiss him back. You disconnect, a string of saliva connecting you to him. "So what do you want to eat, baby?"

The car drives off and you don't feel so bad about the situation anymore.

Fun fact: I got the idea to make this when I was lonely and my boyfriend (now x) wasn't paying attention to me so I downloaded an app to make friends and a guy I thought was my friend started being really pushy and I found out men are stupid dogs.

[demonpiratehuntress]

I see you have requests opened! If you don’t mind, I’d love an Ace one.

You’re a mermaid who rescues ace when he falls overboard drunk one night. His brilliant idea is to keep falling overboard to keep being rescued by you to get your attention cuz he can’t think of any other way. The crew thinks he’s insane and stands by in case he actually doesn’t get saved. To the point reader is like you do know there are other ways to see me besides trying to kill yourself?

this is actually such a funny and cute idea, i love it XD sorry it took so long, and i hope you like it!

taglist - @kabloswrld

(i'm so sorry i forgot i had someone to tag! if anyone else wants to be added just let me know!)

just call me, idiot

Portgas D. Ace x Mermaid!Reader

summary - idiot Ace <3

warnings - mentions of drowning, one joke about Ace trying to kill himself

You've heard them every night for the past week.

Whenever you swam up to the surface to look at the stars, the boisterous laughter and obnoxious chatter of men partying the night away aboard their ship met your ears. It was annoying, to say the least, but you wouldn't dare risk being ensnared by them for their amusement by calling them out for it.

That is, of course, until one of their crewmembers changed your mind about them.

"Man overboard!"

"The dumbass!"

"He can't swim!"

Your attention was caught one night when those panicked comments filled the air, and you looked towards the ship to see someone struggling in the water nearby. Against your better judgement, you swam over quickly and hooked your arms under the man's armpits, lifting him above the water so he could breathe. Once he was done spluttering and coughing up water, and you got a good look at him, you blushed.

He was handsome, extremely handsome. Dark hair stuck to his pale face, cute freckles dotting his cheeks. His eyes were bright with mischief, but when he smiled at you you couldn't help but think he looked angelic.

"A mermaid!" He gasped, eyes brightening even more. "This must be my lucky night." And he gave you a drunken smile, making you sigh.

You waited patiently for someone to come down to get him, keeping him afloat in the meantime since you couldn't very well climb aboard. Eventually they dropped a rowboat, and you carefully settled the now passed out man into it. You stayed to watch them pull him up, hearing shouts of 'thank you' but all you could focus on was how pretty that man was.

And how you hoped to see him again soon.

You got your wish the very next night, because Ace couldn't get you out of his head. He had been drunk, sure, but he definitely remembered seeing a mermaid. And he wanted to see you again, but he just didn't know how to get a mermaid's attention.

"You must have hit your head pretty hard to think you saw a mermaid!" Marco teased him, making the others laugh. None of them believed Ace, and every single one of them considered the idea absurd and insane - even more so since Ace is known for pulling pranks.

"But I did!" He insisted, pouting.

"Ace, there is no way you could have seen a mermaid," Marco sounded worried now. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," the 2nd division commander grumbled. "But I'll prove it."

So his brilliant idea to prove it? To pretend he was drunk again and fall overboard, so you could come and save him again.

You came to his rescue again, sure enough, but this time Ace could see you clearly and he was awestruck by your beauty. For once the talkative commander was stunned into silence, and he just stared at you for the longest time until you blushed and looked away.

"We need to stop meeting like this," you told him, laughing softly. "You need to be more careful."

"You're so beautiful," he ignored your warning, smiling like a lovestruck sailor - which he was. "Really, really beautiful."

You blushed some more, "Because I'm a mermaid."

"I'd like to think that even if you weren't, I'd still have fallen for you."

Your eyes widened at his words, butterflies blooming in your gut. Your face flushed a bright red, and for a moment you were speechless. Then you remembered he belonged on land, and quickly helped him back to his ship.

"You should stop falling into the sea," you told him, "You're a devil fruit user aren't you? You could die."

"It would be worth it to see you again," he smiled, and you were concerned that he was actually serious.

"Just go," you laughed.

"Not without getting your name," he replied. "Please?"

You sighed, "It's (Name)."

"Pretty," he grinned. "I'm Ace."

And once he was gone up again, you couldn't help but feel a longing for the man you couldn't have. Little did you know, he was thinking the exact same about you. You never left each other's minds, and while you could only wish to see him again, Ace made it his personal mission to see you whenever he could.

He ignored your words and kept falling into the ocean, so much so that it became a habit of his, just to see you. You could tell soon enough that he was doing it on purpose and wasn't really drunk, but he would never listen when you told him to stop. What made it even funnier, though, was that you could see his crewmates gather around every time he committed to this dramatic method, all of them ready to jump in and stop the dumbass from drowning if needs be. They clearly still assumed he was insane.

"Ace," you giggled one night after saving him again, "There are better ways to see me, you know."

"Like how?" He pouted.

"You could just call me, idiot," you laughed, handing him a shell. "Just blow into that and I'll come. You don't have to try and kill yourself to see me."

He chuckled, holding the shell close, "Fine, I'll stop. I think my crew is starting to worry that I've completely lost it. They stand by waiting to see if one of them needs to jump in." He laughed, then gave you a warm smile, "But my hero never fails to rescue me."

You blushed, looking down shyly, "Well it would be a shame to let such a handsome sailor drown."

"You think I'm handsome?" He smirked, moving closer. The two of you were sitting in the rowboat his crew lowered for you, so it was easy for you to be this close without him drowning.

"I do," you blushed more.

His smile only widened before he leaned in and slowly captured your lips with his, one his warm hands gently gripping your chin as he kissed you. The butterflies returned, and you kissed him back just as slowly and sweetly as your hand rested on his arm.

"So we don't need to keep standing here every time the idiot throws himself overboard?" Someone called from above, breaking your kiss and making you both laugh.

"Not anymore, no. Because the idiot will NOT keep throwing himself overboard," you responded, smiling.

"But-"

"It's not worth dying Ace!"

[cloudybarnes]

Private Encounters

Pairing: Cardan Greenbriar x reader

Summary: you were tired of Cardan constantly attacking you and your friends. one day, though, Cardan asks to speak with you privately, and no good things could come from the prince of elfhame wanting to speak with you with no one else around

Word Count: 2.4k

Masterlist

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"Hurry up, you guys! We're gonna be late again!" Taryn whisper-shouted as you and Jude trailed behind her towards the courtyard.

Usually, you two went alone on your adventures, but Taryn decided she wanted to be spontaneous, too, and wanted to join along. Unfortunately, she didn't seem to have that much fun, and urged you back to class almost as soon as you got there.

"Who cares if we're late?" Jude rolled her eyes. "It's not like anyone would really care."

"Just because they don't like us, doesn't mean I want to draw their attention. Who knows what they'll do." Taryn shifted the picnic basket of food between her hands, nervously. She was always the most cautious of you three; always fearing what they would say or do to you guys.

You scoffed, "Taryn, let's be real. Even if we were there on time and minded our own business, Cardan and his little fanclub would still find some reason to bother us."

Jude chuckled, "he's so insufferable. What I wouldn't do to wipe that idiotic grin off his face."

You laughed, "I'm right there with you. It's like his greatest pleasure is being annoying."

"I don't know." Taryn slows her speed walk to match pace with Jude and I. "I feel like Cardan mostly has it out for you, now, (Y/N)."

You rolled my eyes.

"Oh yeah," Jude agreed. "Ever since we became friends, he's like diverted the hatred for us onto you."

You laughed, "Wow, thanks guys. Who knew being your friend would make a prince despise me."

Jude laughed too. "I don't think it was all our fault. You're human, so he would have hated you anyway."

"That's so reassuring, thanks for that."

Jude smirked, "anytime."

When we finally emerged onto the courtyard where class was taking place, most everyone ignored you, save for the professor.

"Ah," he said, "nice of you three to join us. Please find a seat so we can continue on with our lessons of astronomy."

Taryn bowed her head to keep from looking at anyone. You noticed Jude did not bow her head, but she would not look at the other students.

You, however, must be an idiot to not follow along with them, because your gaze falls straight to Cardan, who is staring back at you with much ferocity.

As the even bigger idiot you are, you do not avert your gaze, but simply glare back at him. To that, and small, devilish grin grows on his face. It almost seems like an invite of this little game you play. He hates you and your friends, goes out of his way to torment you three, and for that, you refuse to back down. Sometimes, you think he likes that you fight him so much.

"(Y/N)," Taryn calls, quietly as to avoid too much attention. She waves you over. Only then do you realize you've been staring at Cardan so long that Jude and Taryn have already set up the blanket and started spreading out the food.

Your cheeks heat as you walk the few feet to where they are sitting. You can hear Cardan snicker as you walk past him and Nicasia.

"What were you thinking!" Taryn scolds as you finally sit down on the blanket. Your professor continues with his lecture, but you don't even bother to pay attention to him.

You shrug, "I'm not really sure. I just can't stand him so much it makes me crazy."

Jude laughs at that. "I'm so glad we're friends, (Y/N). I think I'd go crazy if I didn't have someone else to share my hatred for Cardan with."

You giggle, "well it's a good thing I'm here, then, huh?"

"I don't think anyone is happy you're here."

Looking up from where you're sitting, you see Nicasia and Cardan looming down over you. Seems like the lesson is over as everyone else has abandoned the courtyard.

"Oh, Nicasia, always a pleasure." You rolled your eyes as you stood up. Behind you, you hear the shuffling of Jude standing and pulling Taryn up with here. "To what do we owe you coming over here and bothering us for?"

She smirked, "I have no reason for being near you filthy mortals other than to make sure you stay in your place. You don't belong here. You're frail, and worthless, and someone needs to remind you of that."

You mocked her with a laugh, "is that really all you've got?"

Taryn let out a quiet gasp.

Nicasia narrowed her eyes. "What did you say?"

You shrugged. "All I'm saying is you give the same excuse every time you come over here. 'I'm putting you in your place', 'make sure you know what a worthless mortal you are'. Blah, blah, blah. It's very redundant, Nicasia, and quite truthfully, it's just tiresome." You said condescendingly.

The fire is her eyes was hot. Her fists balled at her side as she glared at you.

Now, it's not like you were looking for trouble, or that you wanted anything bad to happen to you or your friends. You just could not stand the way she and Cardan always came over to you and caused problems.

The slap was expected. Your cheek burned as Nicasia's hand left your face. Taryn couldn't hold back the very audible gasp that left her lips. Looking back to your friends, Taryn looked utterly frightened, and Jude looked angrier than you'd ever seen her.

Right as Nicasia was about to slap you again, Cardan interrupted her.

"Nicasia," Cardan warned as he lifted his hand, "that is quite enough."

You scoffed. "Oh, and since when are you ever the peace maker?"

Cardan smirked, "Since Nicasia decided she was going to slap you. I quite like your face the way it is."

All heads turned to Cardan as he said that. Nicasia looked hurt, Taryn looked almost as confused as you felt, and Jude just looked disgusted.

You narrowed my eyes at Cardan, despite your confusion. "What games are you playing at, Greenbriar?"

His eyebrows shot up in delightful surprise. A cheeky smirk playing on his lips. "I have no games, (Y/L/N)." He spat out your last name like it disgusted but also intrigued him.

He looked between Nicasia, Jude and Taryn. "You, leave us. I have a few words for (Y/N)."

Jude and Taryn looked at each other, confused and contemplating if they should leave or not. You stood your ground though.

"I'll be fine, guys. I'll just meet you back at Madoc's, okay?" You tried to reassure them, though you weren't exactly sure what you were getting yourself into. All you knew was that you didn't want Cardan to know he frightened you.

Jude nodded her head. "We won't be far. And Cardan," she turned to him, "if you so much as touch one hair on her head, I will-"

"Oh relax, would you, Jude? Always resolving your issues with murder." Cardan rolled his eyes. "Leave us. Now."

Jude glared at Cardan before turning to you and giving you a reassuring look. Just as quickly, she turned away and pulled Taryn off with her.

"And you," Cardan said as he turned to Nicasia. "I believe I ordered you away, as well."

Nicasia looked shocked. "Me? Why would I need to be sent away? Whatever punishment you have for the way she spoke to me, I want-"

"Leave, Nicasia. I won't ask you again."

Stunned, Nicasia's mouth hung open just slightly as she looked between you and Cardan. With a 'hmph', Nicasia turned on her heel and strutted away, leaving behind just Cardan and you.

The two of you stood there in silence. You gazed up at him, trying to decipher why he could possibly want to speak with you alone. Maybe he wants to kill you. Maybe he's grown tired of this cat and mouse game you have going on.

"What do you want, Cardan?"

He smirked, and took a daring step closer to you. "I just wanted to talk with you. You're... interesting. I find you intriguing to say the least."

You raised my brow in confusion. "You find me intriguing? Now I know you're toying with me. What do you really want, Cardan?"

He scoffed. "Is it that hard for you to admit that I might find you interesting?"

"How interesting could I possibly be? I'm mortal, remember? Can't believe you would forget, not after you and your friends made it your entire personalities to constantly remind me of my mortality and how worthless you believe me to be."

Cardan's smirk only grew. "You are quite right. You're mortal. Mortals by nature are fragile, slow, susceptible to our tricks, and yet you seem to be quite the opposite."

Your eyebrows shot up, completely shocked by this sort-of compliment you just received from the Prince of Elfhame.

Cardan continued before you could even get a word out. "I dislike mortals quite a bit. I think they are weak. They have little skill that is worth anything, and they are often succumbed to the nature of our people. You, however, are quite different, (Y/N)."

He took a tender step closer to you. Your breath was caught in your throat. Cardan had never shown any type of interest in you. You thought he'd never actually shown anything other than disgust towards you, but maybe you were wrong.

Maybe all of those teasing smirks and cruel comments were him testing you, trying to figure out just how far he could push you.

"You've stood up to me. You've been given every chance to back down. I've seen how far you are willing to go to defend yourself and those little friends of yours. I find it admirable in a way."

You force out a laugh. "You find it admirable? Everything you consider so 'strong' and 'admirable' about me is what I've had to do to survive this place. You've done nothing but make living here just that much harder than it already is for mortals."

You strode closer to Cardan, persistence on your face. His eyes widened slightly, but the daring smirk never faltered from his lips.

Just as you two were chest to chest, you spoke, "answer now, Cardan, what is it you really wanted to tell me?"

"I've already told you, (Y/N). I think you're admirable. I think you're intriguing. I think there is something about you that keeps drawing me in. Something so pulling, it's frustrating how much I think of you."

No words left your mouth. How could they when your jaw laid open the way it was.

Cardan chuckled. "Now, another reason I wanted you here. I must ask: I know you mortals can lie, something we folk can not do, but how are you so good at pretending?"

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly. "Pretending?"

Cardan's smirk only grew, "pretending you aren't in love with me, that is."

The world had stopped. It felt like your entire world had shattered. This was quite possibly the last thing you thought Cardan would get you alone for.

Anyone with eyes could see that Cardan Greenbriar was gorgeous. All of his kind were gorgeous, but he had exceptional beauty. Beside that, you couldn't find one characteristic about him that you had liked. Sure, maybe he stopped Nicasia from hurting you further than she would have. And by the way Jude recalled his cruelty before they met you, it seemed to have subsided quite a bit since you met him. That still doesn't change the fact that he is cruel, and has been for a long time.

"Cat got your tongue?"

You shook your head clear from your thoughts. "No. Just confused how you could possibly think I would be in love with you."

"You want to know how I know you're in love with me, despite what you might believe?" Cardan grinned and closed the already small space between you two. "Because I know how insufferable you find me. I know how I get under your skin, how you lay awake thinking of how much you hate me. I know this because I feel the same towards you, and despite my feelings of irritation with you, I still find myself completely infatuated by you."

"You are?" You questioned, voice so quiet you might barely have heard it, but Cardan sure did.

He grinned. "Oh, yes. I have been infatuated with you from the moment I laid eyes on you. I wasn't lying earlier when I told Nicasia I'd like her to leave your face the way it is. I think you are pretty for a mortal. You give off this glow and iridescence. You are unlike any other mortal I've come across. The way you've kept me up at night, the way I am excited to see you just to have our little spat had me confused for the longest time. Eventually, I just couldn't take it anymore and I’ve decided to act on it."

You couldn't take it anymore. Everything Cardan said resonated so deeply with you. Somehow he knew exactly how you felt. The way you hated him, the way you were angry with yourself when you thought of him so often, everything he said he felt is exactly what you were going through as well.

You decided, if Cardan was going to act on his confusing feelings, you would act on yours as well.

Already chest to chest, you reached up and gripped Cardan hair, tight enough to hurt, and kissed him with all of the pent up anger and hatred for him you had.

If Cardan was surprised, he didn't seem it. He gripped onto your waist and kissed you back with so much ferocity it made your knees weak.

It was hot, and it was unlike any kiss you've ever had before. Kissing Cardan was unleashing something so deep inside of you. All of your confused feelings for him wrapped up all into a long-awaited kiss.

Gasping for air, you and Cardan separated, though not fully. While you were no longer kissing, you had yet to pull your fingers from the tangles of his hair, and he had no plans of letting go of his hold on your waist.

"I still hate you," you said breathlessly.

Cardan smiled, he actually smiled and replied, "I think I hate you more."

[lovelybrooke]

Excuse me, I know you wrote for L Lawliet a lot but if you have time could you write for a platonic yandere L Lawliet and a child gender neutral reader? It can be a story or headcanons, anything you want.

Thanks!

Aren't you excited (Platonic Yandere L Lawliet x child reader).

Check out my other works here: Masterlist

---

The house was surprisingly quiet today.

You knew why, L was here today. Well not here, it was just him on a computer, but his presence still left an impact. All the other kids were gathered around the computer, asking him question after question.

You never really cared. Unlike some of the other children, you no longer hold out hope that you'll eventually become L successor. You don't wish to waste time striving for an unattainable goal, rather focusing on something much more obtainable, being adopted.

The sounds of children talking was distant but audible, but you choose to ignore it in favor of the book in your lab. This is probably your eighth time reading it, but you enjoy it more than the other books in the library. It's a fantasy novel about a girl traveling through time trying to save her family. It was basic, all the twists and turns very simple, but it had a charm a lot of the other books didn't.

"(Y/N), would you like to talk to L?" A softspoken adult comes up to you, eyeing you at your spot on the couch. You shake your head, sparing them a small glance before returning to your book. The man sighs, walking back over to the computer, whispering something into the microphone as the kids disperse in multiple directions. You can hear the computer shut close as the man walks out of the room with it tucked under its arm, his face adorning an unreadable expression.

---

During lunch you sat alone.

You've never been good at making friends, the Wammy's house not exactly being an ideal place to foster friendships. Either way, you've always been a solitary person, opting for the comfort of books rather than people.

But for some reason, today was different.

You sat down at your unofficial official table, tucked away in a corner just so you could push away your lunch and read the chosen book of the day.

But today, you were spooked by the sound of the chair across from you scrapping, the soft sound of someone sitting down filling you with dread. Slowly turning your head up, you come face to face with near, L's most likely successor. He gives you a wide eye stare, like he was trying see into your soul.

Admittedly, Near freaked you out. It wasn't unusual for the children at the Wammy's house to be bad at communicating, but with Near, it was different. It wasn't unusual to catch him staring at you, unabashedly, or for him to ask you strange questions that threw you for a loop. In short, you two weren't really the greatest of friends.

"Did you need something?" You whisper to him, giving him a very confused look. Near shuffled into his seat further, his strange way of sitting causing your brow to furrow. His legs were too his chest, his hands resting on his knees. While it looked uncomfortable, he seemed perfectly fine. Almost too fine.

"Why aren't you eating?" He asked, ignoring your question.

Some of the tenseness in your shoulders leave at the sound of his soft voice, but you were still clearly on edge. "I'm reading." You say, shaking your book a little for emphasis. Near nods, an uncaring air around him. He shuffles a bit more, listening to the children around him speaking, his eyes constantly darting from you to the others around you.

You try your hardest to ignore the kid across from you, but every time you felt his gaze flicker towards you, you wanted to fall over and die. Eventually, it becomes too much to bear and with a small huff, you confront the odd boy.

"What do you want." It sounded rude, but you were fed up with the staring and whispers. Despite you clear annoyance, Near doesn't respond instantly, simply tilting his head with a thumb in his mouth.

"Do you ever think about being adopted" He questions. You fumble for a second before countering back.

"Sometimes." That was an understatement, and he could tell. A small, nearly unnoticeable smile crosses his face, though it returns back to his stoic expression before you could comment on it.

"What do you mean, sometimes?" Now he was just playing with you, and irritation was written all across your face.

You shrug your shoulders, the book that was previously in your hands now closed on the table. "I want the same as everyone else here, a happy family." You raise a brow at him, "how about you?"

"Same probably." It was a quick answer, and the strange look on Near's face made you think he was hiding something from you. Though, the blank expression on your face made it hard to get anything out of him.

"He asked for you, y'know?" Your movement stopped. He was referring to L, you could tell by the look on his face, a faraway but somehow focused expression. You, in contrast, were shocked that L knew you. But he probably knew about everyone in the orphanage, right? You didn't want to dwell on it too long, your stomach already hurt from the lack of food, you didn't need to add on nerves on top of it.

"Okay, what about it?" You knew lunch was about to end soon but you wished it was over right now.

Near slowly shuffled off the chair, his eyes never leaving you as he moves. He whispers something too quiet to hear as the squeaking of chairs and sounds of children fill the room. You turn to grab you book, but before you could ask him any more questions, Near was gone.

---

Today, you got a new book.

It was the sequel to the one you were previously reading. You were shocked to see the book in the library. It rarely got new books, and science fiction was definitely at the bottom of the list.

Though, you weren't complaining. It was a nice change of pace to be able to read something new for one. Plus, it was in pristine condition, barely a mark on it. It was like no one had even touched it before you.

"(Y/N), are you listening?" You snap up, a very upset teacher eyeing you. You nod shyly, closing the book slowly while attempting to ignore the giggling of children. The teacher rolls her eyes, very much used to your behavior at this point. "Really, (Y/N), I don't know how you expect to get anywhere with your heads always up in the clouds."

You don't really process her words, used to them at this point. You weren't like the other children, you weren't naturally gifted, you didn't have the same skills as them. You rather spend your time in your own world, than in one that seemed so against you.

A knock on the door turned your attention away from the teacher, a man entering the room. He was the same one from the other day, the soft-spoken man who seemed very annoyed with your reluctance to talk to L. His eyes darted around the room, landing on yours for a second to long, causing you to look down at your lap in embarrassment. The teacher acknowledged his presence by speeding over to him, exchanging whispers to each other for a few moments.

The classroom was dead silent as the teacher pointed towards you and directed you to the man, motioning you out of the room. So much was communicated without words. You knew it was urgent by the jolts and jerks of her movement, and by how the man placed his hand on your back to get you to move faster though the long winding hallways.

It felt like hours of walking before you were sat down in an empty classroom. It looked like it had been empty for a while, noted by the dust lining the tables and the thick air surrounding you. "Please, sit near the front." He said, pointing to the closest table. You fumble for a few seconds, very confused and nervous, before sitting down, smoothing down your clothes in an attempt to self sooth.

A piece of paper and a pencil is placed down on your desk, "All you need to do is answer the questions." He said, his voice calm as ever, though there was a hit of edge behind every word. "Most of them are opinion based, so don't dwell on the questions to long." He paused, sitting down at the teacher's desk in the front of the classroom. "Please just...answer honestly." His words become quite as he continues, but they fill you this enough dread to take them to heart.

You lean forward, slowly moving your seat as to make as little noise as possible. You flip the paper, nothing on the back, and the front appeared to only have five questions.

Question number one, "what is your favorite food?" You tilt your head, confused, but ultimately relieved that it was simple to answer. You scribble down a few words before moving onto the next one.

Question number two, "where do you want to live when you grow up?" Slightly strange question, usually it's what you want to do when you grow up, but sure, you weren't really complaining. Again, you write a few things until you feel satisfied.

Question number three, "Do you have difficulty making friends?" You almost drop your pencil at the question, but you calm yourself quickly. You don't know how to answer the question really, but you think of Near, and your very few conversations. They were fine, but you were never really friends, at least you don't think so. You wonder if Near thought of you as a friend.

Question number four, "Would you like to be adopted?" What sort of question was that, of course you did. Wasn't that the point of everyone here. You dreamed of having a normal, simple family. Instead, you're stuck here, for what seems like forever. You don't say that though, just writing down something simple.

Question number five, "Describe your ideal father figure." You racked your brain for an example, but nothing really came. Instead, your mind went to the protagonist father in your favorite book. He was a reserved man but had a deep love for his daughter. He did everything in his power to keep her safe, eventually even sacrificing himself to have her live. You admired the selflessness of the man, his devotion to his child, and his desire to keep her safe. If you have a father, you'd want one like that. You write it down quickly.

After finishing all the questions, you stand up and rush over to the table, placing the paper down in front of the man. You stand still as he grabs the paper, placing it in a folder and then in his bag. "Good, good, thank you." He gives you an awkward smile, "You can return to class now."

You nod, shuffling toward the door, your fists tightly clenched as anxiousness filled your body. Before you can leave, you're turning around quickly, facing the man. "What was the test for?" You ask, voice wavering.

The man barely spares you a glance as he collects his things and stands up. "You don't have to worry about it for now." Again, there was that smile, and your stomach churned.

---

Today was quiet.

L wasn't here today, or you guess, he wasn't on the computer today. The common room was filled with children quietly talking, doing homework, playing games. You, like every other day, was sitting on your spot in the couch, reading your book.

Everyone in a while, you look over at the children playing games. It wasn't uncommon to see children playing games together, but the games looked new, some even still covered in plastic wrap. You assumed that they were donated, or that one of the caretakers bought them.

The new board games brought your mind to your new book, pristine and untouched. It was strange, all these new items popping up in the orphanage. Entranced by your thoughts, you rub the edge of your book. It couldn't have been a coincident, you were the only one that read that book, so much that the librarian let you keep it indefinitely.

Maybe she was being nice, saw that you enjoyed the book, and bought you the rest of the series. But even she was surprised by new book, like she wasn't aware of its existence.

"(Y/N)." You look up, it was someone different, and older man this time. "May I have a word with you?" You nod, closing your book and placing it on the couch.

You follow the man into a much more formal room than the classroom you were in yesterday. It was mostly bare, simply a desk with two chairs across it. You take a seat, the old man following suit, grasping his hands together as he places them in the middle of the desk.

The man smiles, noting your clear nerves, "don't worry, you're not in trouble." You nod, letting out an audible exhale. The man chuckles, his smile not leaving, which calms you a little. "I have some news about your potential adoption."

You barely have time to feel any happiness before you're asking questions. "I-I'm sorry. Who are you?" You ask with a tilt of your head. The man doesn't react to your confusion, his expression never changing.

"I am Watari." He said and your eyes wide. You knew about Watari, but most children don't see him these days. He was always concerned with L, and unless you were likely to be his successor, you were not likely to see him.

Watari is perceptive and can tell your discomfort at his precedence. He reclines back in his chair, leaving some space in between you too. He sighs, calm and gentle, it was hard to tell he was an old man, other than his old looks. "I promise there's nothing to worry about." He pauses, watching your breathing calm, "L has...taken an interest in you, to say the least." He mumbles the last part. "He's been keeping an eye on you; he knows your favorite color, your favorite food, your favorite book." He lists things off, one by one, they bring you no comfort.

"You know, a part of me considers L my son. I care about him deeply." His words were serious, a contrast to his previous infliction. "I know he would do the same if given the chance."

You didn't know how to respond. You didn't know what to think. It was hard to think under these circumstances. You don't imagine you have a choice, judged by the way Watari is framing his words. He wasn't offering something; he was telling you what was going to happen.

"I'll help you pack your things, will leave in a few minutes." He guides you out the room, heading towards your bedroom. You shake of your confusion, stumbling slightly towards the common room.

In your seat was Near, his book in his hands, skimming though the pages. When you enter, he looks up, offering one of his strange smiles. "Aren't you excited?" You don't respond as he hands you the book.

Suddenly, all the love you once had for it gone.

---

A/n: Sorry for the lack of L, hope you still enjoyed it.

[sleepingnova]

imagine miles morales confessing to you that he is spider man after he saves you from something idk I love him

sure thing anon :) I don't know if you wanted this to be a pre - established relationship, so I'm just gonna go on a limb here and do that. sorry this took so long, I had a sudden burst of motivation. it's 1 am, so this isn't proofread

wc : I don't have a fucking clue, how do you check your word count if you're mobile?? I wanna do that 😭

Friendly neighborhood spider - man

pairing: miles morales x journalist reader

summary : being new york's top journalist has its perks, but it always seems to attract the wrong type of attention.

Journalism. It's not for the faint of heart. When you have deadlines to make, interviews to take care of, and people constantly yelling either at you or around you 24 / 7, everything can be a bit time consuming.

That also means you get a lot of attention. Some good, while others..not so much. Sure, its nice to have a free coffee or cake pop every now and then for the articles and the interviews you do; people have always said you have a way with words.

You really don't even know how you got into this situation. The caffeine kicked in, which made you jumpy to everyone and everything, really. Your eyebags were not very nice to look at and to be honest, you looked a mess.

You woke up late for class, you weren't really feeling like getting out of bed anyways but you did it anyway. No makeup, no nice and preppy clothing, just you; and boy did that bite you in the ass. You were 95% sure that all the things you had in life were handed to you because you were pretty. For instance, the guy who hired you literally took one look at you and said "congratulations, you're hired. we could use a pretty girl like you for coffee runs, right sweetheart?"

With balancing college and your career as a journalist, it's not too difficult. So then why'd you end up in this situation? Getting cornered by 3 guys in a dark ass alleyway, and it's 3:05 am.

No one at your job comes close to you when it comes to performance. Every single time. The newest topic of discussion is Brooklyn's number one trending for 7 years straight : spider - man.

"Who was he?" is your focus. The CEO of your job was retiring, and he held a competition to see who would take his spot. He obviously had you in mind, but he wanted to make things fair and you told him you wanted to earn it, not have it given to you.

The challenge was fairly simple: Get an exclusive interview with spider - man and have him answer a couple questions.

You've done exclusives before, not a problem. Until you realized, major problem. He swings around the city 24/7 how in fucks name were you going to catch him? Until an idea came to you. You stayed up all night, then you got hungry, so you left your dorm and walked down the street to the 24 hour convenience store. You liked documenting what you do, so you were recording on your phone where you were going.

After getting some snacks, you left and couldn't shake the feeling you were being followed. You were. By 4 different people. One of whom was none other than the infamous Miles Morales or, well, spider - man. He saw the guys five minutes ago and didn't want to do anything until he knew for sure you were getting followed.

A bit of time passes and miles realizes, he lost you. He hears a muffled shout from down the street so he runs towards it, jumping from rooftop to rooftop.

Now your mind comes back to this exact moment. You can't really make out what the guy in front of you is saying, but you think he's trying to rob you, but why would he need two other guys to rob someone? Especially in the middle of the night. You look dazed and totally not scared at all, Miles thinks, as he's literally invisible right in front of you.

You come out of your trance to one of them forcing you onto the ground. You wiggle and worm your way away, but it's not enough. Fear settled in as you realized what they were doing.

"Hey! Let her go." A voice shouts. You reach into your pocket to grab your pepper spray as you see a bunch of webs and hear hard blows hitting, but it's really dark and you can't see in the dark for shit.

You start running out of the alley and back towards your building, you look back and see the three of them running after you. So you run a little faster, and faster, until you're full on sprinting down the street.

'Thank god my parents forced me into track and field.' you thought, as you got closer and closer to the building. As luck would have it, the doors were locked, and your key was in that bag full of snacks.

They finally catch you, and in a split second, you brace for impact, but it never comes. You're in the air.

You look up and there it is. This is the story that'll get you CEO position, you'll be CEO for the rest of your life. A thought pops into your head as he drops you off at his apartment.

'Was my phone recording everything? Oh shit it was.' you think to yourself as you pull out your phone, your eyes widening.

Another thought pops up. 'oh my god, I'm in spider - man's apartment. it's not even that far from my building.' you wonder as you stop the recording.

"you do know you're going to have to delete that footage, right?" he asks as he lifts up his mask and puts something in his mouth.

"I get your job as a journalist is important, but sweetheart, I gotta keep you safe."

You raise your eyebrow, "how do you know about my job?"

he shrugs as he removes his mask.

"Miles? What the fuck is this? Don't tell me you're.. You're spider - man?" You whisper yell as you back up towards his desk.

"The one and only, love. surprised to see me?" he chuckles.

it was then that everything started to piece together. he always bails on plans, he's always late and has sudden injuries. hell, you even saw his suit in his bag once, but you didn't think anything of it.

"wait.. what does my interview with you have anything to do with keeping me safe?" you raised a brow at him as he plops down on his bed.

"think about it, baby. Me swinging around being spider - man gets pretty complicated when there's an article released by my girlfriend about how she got saved, by me. It puts you in jeopardy, because criminals can find you and use you as bait, and because I don't know that you won't put my identity out there." he explained.

"but you know I'm not like that." you replied.

"yes, I know baby. it's just complicated." he said.

you sighed with a defeated look, knowing that your boss wasn't going to be pleased, but it was for the best.

"if it's alright with you, do you mind if I just stay here for the night? in the morning, on my way to work, I can ask for another key." you asked, softly, him catching your disappointed change in octave.

"yeah sure, that's fine." he replied, walking into his room.

"do you have a spare blanket? I can just sleep out here on the couch." you called to him.

"hm? uh yeah, I think I have a spare. unless you'd like to sleep in my room, with me? the couch is kinda uncomfortable, and it gets kinda cold in here throughout the night." he offered, shyly.

"what about your roommate?" you questioned quietly.

"he won't be back for another week or so, as far as I'm concerned, he'll text if something goes south." he answered.

you thought for a moment, then nodded as you followed him into his room and climbed into his soft bed.

"woah, this is way softer than I thought it would be. what softener do you use when you wash your blankets?" you wondered aloud, cuddling all in his blankets and he chuckled.

"uhhh, I don't know. my roommate does laundry. I don't ever go with him unless he needs me to, which isn't often." he responded.

'ah.' you thought.

"aren't you going to spoon me? c'mon miles, please?" you pleaded with the tired, little puppy dog eyes miles swore he hated, because he could never say no to you when you made that face.

"I'm sorry, I have a couple of essays to write still. Why don't you get the bed nice and warm, then I'll be in bed before you know it." he cooed.

your eyelids started to get heavy as you let out a small hum as you started to fall asleep.

when you woke up the next day, it was 8 am and there was a small basket in the chair next to you.

the basket was filled with your snacks from the night before all wrapped up in the bag still, a hoodie and some clothes to wear to class, a water bottle and a nice book for you to read. on the desk, there was your favorite iced coffee and a note with absolutely beautiful penmanship.

you smiled as you read the letter.

[ hello,

spider man here!

I only have time to answer one of your questions right now, so here it is.

Being a hero isn't about being famous or rich, it's about your own morals and how you stick to them. I started the whole "spiderman" thing when I was 14 years old. It was hard, I had just lost a family member and I felt isolated from my family. You wouldn't believe me if I said that under the mask, I'm just an ordinary person, just like all of you, but I am, really.

I chose to be a hero because I believed in helping others. I really have to leave, so I can't say much more.

Remember, anyone can wear the mask.

Until next time,

—your friendly neighborhood spider man. ]

while you knew that you couldn't tell anyone about who was really under the mask, a part of you felt proud that he trusted you with his secret.

should I make another part to this? likes and reblogs are always appreciated :>