#it's almost 2 am i cannot proof

[blacknailsandheartbreak]

Imagine the group cannot understand how you and Zuko are so close with you being a literal saint and Zuko being... well Zuko

AN: I am back! Man, it's been a hot minute since my last post! ...Lets not think about that because I am back! :) woo hoo

~1400 word count

Part 2 once your done reading :)

SO, lets jump in and see what this Zuko fic about??? Well, imagine this...

The whole group is together and you are the newest member joining from an encounter at a local market. You'd travel alone from town to town, trying to help in any way you can to help fix the wounds the war had created. You fit in well, very polite and nice, never showing any anger, but very capable of defending your own with a bow. You became close with Katara, almost like sisters. Though, unknown to the group that you were a fire bender, you wished to keep that a secret. Your nation had done too much damage and could not bear to be tied to such a name. You hadn't practiced in a long time and were contempt on keeping it that way. You were good enough with your bow, you could protect yourself without the aid of bending. But one person saw through your mask, the only other fire bender in the group. You had a feeling he knew, as he was finding ways to spend more time with you, offering to walk with you to the market, to fetch water or wood, and he seemed to only ask you questions while it was just the two of you. If he did know you were a fire bender, then let it be so.

You volunteered one night to gather firewood, and Zuko promptly offered his assistance, in your nature you gladly accepted, you did like the company. While you two walked, you held a wicker basket against your hip and did most of the talking. Zuko hummed in response, keeping note of their far distance from the camp. As the conversation seemed to die out, Zuko stopped walking and you walked a couple more steps before realizing his halt. You turn around and lock eyes, both of you stand straight and still like statues. You knew what was coming next, your hair swayed slightly in the wind, the setting sun leaving amber shadows across you both.

"You're a bender, a fire bender." Zuko states, no question to his voice. You couldn't deny it, there was no point, he knew. You looked at him and smiled. You confirmed his suspicions, and explained to him that you have been building a new reputation for yourself outside of a fire bender label, trying to heal the brand the fire nation left on your skin as well as all its people and the ones it had affected. Zuko seemed sad, he apologized for his nation, our nation. He had promised things would change after Sozin's comet, once he overtook his father. You smile and agree that Zuko would make a fine Fire Lord, you talk to him about how much you believe can change. Ever since that night You two became close, very close. Close in ways the group could only suspect, but no proof.

On the last night of the Gaangs regrouping, before they had to pack up camp and keep moving, everyone had gone to bed, except for Zuko. He had a hard time trying to get to sleep that night, so he went out for a walk to try and clear his head. He sat by the nearby river and thought about what you had said, to rebuild a new reputation as to not be associated with the fire nation, start anew. Zuko balled his fists in anger at his country, the horrible things, unspeakable notions they had unleashed. Zuko scrunched his nose in disgust and felt the pull of his scar, a sensation that he was use to, one that would usually bring more frustration but only brought him sorrow tonight, as your words passed though his mind, 'trying to heal the brand the fire nation left on your skin as well as all its people and the ones it had effected'. Zuko felt the shame of his land pile on his shoulders, but he decided to head back to camp before he got too far into his head.

Back at camp, everyone was in bed, Toph slept alone in her stone tent, the boys had their own tent, while You and Katara shared a tent. Katara took a leap on that last night and decided to ask you about you and Zuko. She thought now would be the best time over any. Katara looked at you laying with your back to her, she gently poked your shoulder and you turned over.

"Sorry for waking you, but I had a question and I hope you take no offence, but you and Zuko... you guys have seemed to be getting very close... so um... are you guys... you know... together...?" Katara asked you in a quiet whisper with wide curious eyes.

While Katara spoke, Zuko had made his way back into camp and heard the faint whispers. It was unlike him to listen in on others' conversations but they had obviously not heard him return, and he seemed to be the topic of their subject so he decided it was fair game to listen. He caught on quickly as it was something about you and him.

You smiled and replied in a steady whisper, "Zuko and I have become good friends, nothing more." You and Zuko knew there was a bond beyond your secrets you shared, but you two were not together, just close.

Zuko had his arms crossed across his chest, he felt no offence towards the statement you shared, it was true, it was a neutral answer he could respect.

Katara responds "Oh okay... um if you don't mind me asking another question," You nodded her on, Katara continued, "Zuko and you seem to be very different, as in you are so... vibrant and kind, I don't think I have ever seen you mad." She said giggling quietly, and you smiled. "But Zuko... well you know Zuko, he only ever... scowls. Spirits, I think a smile might split his face in half..."

Zuko furrows his brows at the comment, and grabs across his mouth, 'I can smile', he thinks to himself, lowering his hand.

Katara continues, "and... and it's like pulling teeth trying to get him to talk..." Katara looks at you, "How do you- being your bubbly self, connect with someone like him? How can you talk with him for as long as you do when he seems to barely listens half the time?"

'Barely listen??' Zuko thought as his eyebrows shot up at the comment, 'Is she serious? How could she possibly think that!'

You smile at her observation, "Zuko is very kind to me," you say sweetly.

Zuko's face relaxes to your answer, and he uncrosses his arms.

You continue, "But you're right, he never says much, and yes, he is indeed quiet, but when one has gone through so much, it is understandable. We all know that feeling to some extent and we all have our ways of dealing with it. I have accepted how Zuko conveys himself as he had accepted me for how I present myself. But over all, yes, he does listen, even if it seems he is not, he always does." You conclude with a sweet smile.

Zuko is almost taken back from your answer in a way he cannot explain, but it feels as if an unknown weight has lifted off his shoulders from your response. He decided to leave the conversation there as he had heard all he needed to, and turned to walk away. But the next thing you said had caught his attention.

"Who knows," You add, "his ears are probably burning right now with the mere conversation of us talking about him...". You both giggle and say your goodnights. Zuko smirked and rolled his eyes and walked back to his tent. Although, as he replays the conversation over in his mind, something sits like a small rock in his stomach. 'Zuko and I have become good friends, nothing more.' Nothing more, he thought over and over in his head, maybe with time that could change. Once Zuko becomes Fire Lord and is able to start the change that the world needed to heal, you would embrace your bending and be proud of your nation. But that would come in time, so for right now, he could work with good friends.

[sluttysnowangel666]

The Woman Beyond the Wall

Cregan Stark x Wilding!Fem reader

Summary: Cregan must go beyond the wall to aid Castle Black after a large group of Nights Watch men are killed under strange circumstances, only for him to discover the “strange circumstance” is a beautiful and mysterious wilding woman that will make him forget everything he thought he knew.

not proof read yet!!

cw: angst, smut, dom fem reader, dom cregan, freaky cregan, reader is kind of odd 😭

word count: long af

part 2 , masterlist

⛫ ⛫ ⛫

Cregan sat, contemplating the decision before him.

“Forgive me, sirs. The kingdom greatly appreciates the sacrifice you men have made to serve the Nights Watch, but I cannot abandon my duties as a lord to go beyond the wall for Gods knows how long.” He tells them, hoping they won’t take offense to his declination to participate.

“We wouldn’t ask if we were not desperate, my lord.” The maester says, “But 15 men have disappeared just in this past exhibition. The Nights Watch grows scarce of fighters the more men beyond the wall continue to disappear.”

Cregan sighs, not wanting to go beyond the wall and leave his kingdom without a lord, but also not wanting to leave the Watch vulnerable.

“Alright, Maester Devron.” Cregan sighs, “We owe you men a great debt… I need to know what are these strange circumstances you speak of?”

“Men have reported finding the abandoned bodies with arrows in both their eyes, perfectly positioned every time. It’s rather… unusual how perfectly calculated the shot is. It never changes. Then, the bodies are positioned in circles, with no footsteps left behind. We fear it to be witching.”

A shiver ran up Cregan’s spine, but he hid it well. Witches were almost always stories told by Septs to children in an attempt to get them to behave, so to hear a maester say it was unnerving.

“Don’t be ridiculous, maester.”

“I am not jesting, my lord. When you find the group of men who disappeared only a fortnight ago, you’ll see.”

“When? Not if? How can you be so sure I’ll find them?” Cregan asks.

“She leaves them in the same place every time. About 20 miles beyond the wall, facing north.” The maester says.

Cregan sighs, already frustrated with the venture, and eager to kill a wildling.

———

3 days later, 15 miles beyond the wall, and alone in the blistering cold, Cregan couldn’t help but contemplate his decision. Although he was miserable, he knew it was the honorable thing to do. He wouldn’t have done it, if otherwise.

His horse stopped suddenly, its hair raising and body becoming stiff.

“Dusk.” He said her name. “Move.”

His horse ignored him, standing her ground. “Dusk!” He yelled at her.

She sensed something, but he didn’t know what.

They sat there for what felt like hours, but what was merely seconds.

Finally, the horse began to tredge forward… very, very, slowly. Cregan groaned in frustration, his hands gripping the reins.

They walked like that for miles. No matter how much Cregan tugged the reins, Dusk maintained her slow pace, as if anticipating something was nearby, ready to pounce on them at any given moment.

Night eventually came, and Cregan was forced to set up camp.

“Bloody horse.” He mumbled to himself as he tied her to a nearby tree.

He set up a fire nearby Dusk, then leaned against the tree she was tied to. He fidgeted with the dagger he kept in his armor, carving little dire wolves in the bark. He spoke to Dusk, hoping the already timid horse would comfort his feeling of isolation in the barren icy landscape. It didn’t help.

He eventually fell asleep standing up, leaning his weight against the tree, too on edge to leave himself vulnerable on the ground.

The fire near him had gone out, leaving nothing but the red glowing embers.

The wildling who had been following them for miles used this to her advantage.

She stalked quietly, her boots making no noise or crunch as if she weren’t even there, floating like a ghost.

She made no attempt to immediately kill him, but kept her bow poised, ready to grab an arrow and fly it into his eye if he woke. Normally, any crow out here would’ve been dead miles ago, but this man wasn’t a crow.

She believed him to be a lord, and when her fingers grazed the dire wolf on his chest she knew him to be a Stark. Excitement fueled the fire burning in her veins. She had never seen a lord, especially one so handsome.

Her fingers twirled one of his brown locks, but when he shuffled in his sleep she quickly backed away like a scared bunny.

She decided she would let the cold kill the handsome man, but not before taking a souvenir to remember him.

Her slim, dainty fingers wove into his furs, silently snagging the dagger strapped to his chest. She twirled it in her fingers, admiring the craftsmanship. No smith she had ever met was as talented as the one who made this dagger. She traced the wolf sigil on the handle, then ran the sharp tip of the blade along her finger. A drop of blood hit the snow in front of their feet, and then she ran, snow immediately falling to cover her tracks.

When Cregan awoke, he immediately knew someone had been in the camp. But, how? How could someone have even passed through without him waking?

He looked down, and picked up the snow with the drop of blood on it. His blood immediately ran cold, colder than it already was. There were no footprints. Where could this have even come from?

He checked himself, but was free of any cuts. It was here he noticed… his dagger.

“What in Gods…” He mumbled, feeling all around his body to make sure he hadn’t misplaced it.

He angrily yells into the trees, cursing and violently threatening the woman who stole his dagger, hoping she heard him.

And she does. She quietly giggles in a nearby tree at his brutish behavior. He kicks the burnt wood from the fire, startling his horse.

He mounts the horse, slowly trekking onward to find the bodies of the missing men.

Within the hour, he finds himself at the base of the men’s camp, their bodies positioned like how the maester said they would be.

Cregan sighs, dismounting his horse and staring at the corpses, their bodies frozen and not yet decomposed from the harsh cold.

He was, for the first time in his life, unsure of what to do. He knew the woman had already found him, but how was he to find her? He assumed she left him alive out of mercy, but he knew there was no chance of finding her unless she wanted him to.

“Fuck.” He mumbled, slightly embarrassed at his desperation. “Alright, witch! I know you’re out there!” He yelled into the trees, not actually knowing if she was out there.

She was, and she paid attention as he continued.

“I don’t know your goal, if you even have one!” He paused, not even knowing what else to say. “Stop killing these men!” He said, lacking in confidence. She giggled again. Quite an entertaining man he was.

He gave up, tired of feeling foolish. He began dragging the bodies into a pile, preparing to burn them. It took nearly half of his day, and when he was done he finally sat, sweating, despite the cold.

After his brief rest, he burnt them, saying the custom words, “And now their watch is ended.”

He watched, silently mourning the fallen men who gave their life.

Afterwards, he mounted his horse and started his journey back to the wall. There would be no finding the woman. She was rogue, didn’t run in a pack. He’d be searching for the rest of his life if he stayed.

He didn’t make it far, only a few miles before night fell upon him and his horse. He didn’t want to rest, but he had no choice. The day had worn him, and traveling at night was unwise when he couldn’t see his surroundings.

He set a fire again, and sat down, forcing himself to stay awake.

Suddenly, his horse whined. He whipped his head around, standing to his feet quickly.

“Whoa, whoa. Calm down.” He said, trying to shush the mare. The horse bucked, breaking its reins from the tree before scurrying off.

“Fuck!” Cregan cursed, angrily. What in Gods names was he to do now?

A voice rang out behind him.

“Pretty little beast you’ve got there.”

He whipped around again, unsheathing his sword.

A woman knelt across the fire, her bow and arrow already drawn. She wore gray, thick pelts and gloves, and a pair of fur clad boots. No wonder she was so silent. She pulled her thick hood off, revealing the most beautiful set of eyes Cregan had ever seen. The woman was gorgeous, ethereal. She literally took his breath away.

“Suppose I should say had there.” She teases.

“It’s you.” He finally says, after a moment of silence.

“Mm.” She hums in response. “And who might you be?”

“I think you already know, given you raided my camp last night.”

She laughs. “Raided? You southerners.”

“You’d do well to mind your tongue, witch.” Cregan spits at her, tightening his grip on his sword.

She notices and stands, raising her bow, “And you’d do well to mind yours, crow.”

“I’m not a crow.”

“And I’m not a witch.” She pauses, tilting her head. “Sharp little tongue on you. Ain’t you lords supposed to treat ladies with respect?”

“What kind of lady are you? Killing good men and desecrating their bodies?”

“I never desecrated them. In fact, I left them better than I found them.”

“Those were noble men.”

“Please.” She laughs. “Those crows were rapists and thieves. The north is better without them coming into our land.”

Cregan says nothing, so she continues. “I suggest you watch how you speak to me, Lord Stark. I could shoot this arrow right through those pretty gray eyes before you’d even realize what happened.”

“Try it, witch.”

“I already told you. I’m no witch!” She lets the arrow fly, only intending to let it kiss his ear and hit the tree behind him, but he raises his sword, and the arrow shatters against the Valyrian steel.

She lowers her bow, shocked, before her features return to their stoic form.

“It appears I’ve met my match.” She smirks, impressed.

“Perhaps you have. For that reason, I’d suggest returning my dagger.”

She pulls it out. “Oh, this pretty thing? I think I’ll keep it… Unless you’re brave enough to come take it from me.”

Heat flushed through his stomach. For the first time in his life, a woman repeatedly left him at a loss for words. He did not know how to approach her, or how to respond.

“You obviously walk these woods often. How do I get back to the wall?”

“Simple.” She smiles, “South.”

Cregan stomps towards her. She nervously laughs, backing into a tree as he presses himself against her, his height towering above her own.

“Show me the way or I’ll put your pretty little head above my mantel.”

She breathlessly chuckles, “All you have to do is ask nicely, Stark.” She places her hand on his broad chest, giving it a light push yet keeping her hands entangled in his armor straps. He grabs her wrist, pulling it from him. He removes her quiver from her back, tossing it on the ground. He takes her bow from her other hand, going to give it the same treatment before she stops him.

“No, wait, please don’t leave my bow.” She asks, genuineness in her voice for the first time. He searches her eyes, but finds no answer there.

“You won’t need it where you’re going.” He responds.

“Leave my bow and you’ll die in these woods. And trust me, southerner, you’ll die long before I do.” He looks at the darkness that clouds her eyes, then grunts and puts the large bow around his body.

She smirks as he ties her wrists together, dragging her along behind him. “We’re going now? These woods aren’t safe at night.”

“The sooner you’re no longer my problem, the better.”

She stops in her place, but he gives her a yank that pulls her to the ground, dragging her body behind him. “I’m serious! We need to stay at your sad little camp.”

“One more word out of you and I’ll cut out your tongue.” He says. He takes a few more steps, still dragging her, before stopping. He knows she’s right, but refuses to admit it. He growls in frustration, turning back towards the camp.

She laughs, still being dragged on the ground. What a strange woman. He thinks to himself.

He sits back in front of the fire, still holding the rope attached to her wrist as she crawls towards him.

“Do you have any food?” She asks. He sighs, taking out a little sack of dried meat. He holds a piece out to her, and not moving from her knees, takes it from his hand with her mouth.

“You’re bloody off.” He mumbles to himself. She laughs, a strange and wicked laugh in an attempt to scare him, as well as mock him for thinking she was a witch.

It works, as it startles him into giving her a confused look. He picks up a big pile of snow, throwing it into the fire to put it out.

He lays down on the snow, crossing his arms and closing his eyes. She crawls towards him, opening his arms and lying against his chest.

“Get off me, woman.” He says, pushing her.

“I’m cold! You’re telling me an honorable Stark is going to let a woman freeze to death?”

“Witches don’t get cold. Your blood runs with fire.”

“You southerners and your silly little-“ He pulls her into him, wrapping his big arms around her. He hates to admit it, but her warmth comforted him from the cold.

“I’ll keep you warm if you shut up.”

She listens for once, saying nothing and nuzzling her head into his chest. He sighs, not having the strength to push her away… but not really wanting to either.

Her knee forces his legs apart to push her leg between his, slowly lifting it towards his crotch. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing?” She says, playing dumb. He doesn’t respond. She wiggles her knee more, rubbing her thigh against the leather covering his manhood.

“Stop. Moving.” He says.

“Was I? Sorry, didn’t notice.”

He shifts, trying to keep her from noticing the bulge growing in his leathers.

———

Cregan awakes before her. He stares down at the woman against his chest, her cheeks are tinted from the cold, and her lips are parted slightly. He admires her for a long time before she stirs. He pushes her away, thinking she’s awake.

“Ow.” She grumbles, sleepily. “Why’d you do that?”

“We need to get moving.” He stands, brushing the snow off him.

“Can’t we just lay a bit longer? I didn’t sleep well with you poking me with that thing all night.” She says, running her hand up his knee.

“I wasn’t.” He responds quickly, pushing her hand down. She stands, stretching as best as she can with her hands tied.

They begin walking for a few miles, with her trying to make conversation with him.

“You’re a rather quiet man.” She says, when her previous questions get no response.

“I just don’t have many words for a woman like you.”

“I leave you speechless?” She says, with a smirk.

“Try annoyed.” He responds flatly.

She steps close to him, pressing her chest into his back.

“What are you-“ Before he can realize what she’s doing, she cuts the rope on her wrists on his sword.

He whips around, prepared to knock her unconscious, but she’s too quick. She ducks, kicking his ankle and sweeping him down.

He hits the ground hard, but is back on his feet almost instantly. She runs, fast, beyond him.

He chases after her.

“Witch!” He yells, turning to look for her in every direction after she seemingly vanished.

“I told you I’m not a witch.” She says, stepping from behind a tree.

He stomps towards her, grabbing her by both of her arms, itching to give her a good smack across the face.

He looks down at her, that sly little smirk on her face, her cheeks red and flush, staring back up at him through her wet eyelashes.

She moves her arms from his grip, tracing her skinny fingers up his armor.

“You’re…” He whispers, starting to lose his strength. “Unlike any woman I’ve ever met.”

She grabs him by his neck, and he gasps in shock, but it’s quickly cut off as she pulls him down to meet her lips. Her kiss is harsh and fierce. Cregan had known women, but never one so blatantly unapologetic to be herself. She growls like an animal, ripping to get off his furs and leathers.

He matches her intensity, kissing her with the same energy. He lets the anger she ignited in him release itself unto her by biting and kissing her neck. She tugs at his hair, grinding her hips into his.

“Are you a virgin?” He asks.

“Don’t be stupid.” She responds, taking a step back to remove her own furs. He steps back towards her, pulling them off her himself.

“I only ask for your comfort.” He growls, frustrated with her attitude.

“Comfort? This isn’t the south.” She pushes him back, standing before him naked and unashamed. He breathes in the sight before him, his length growing at her beauty.

She practically pounces on him, pushing him to the snow before he’s even fully undressed.

“You are a fucking witch.” He moans, as she crawls her way up his body to rest her wetness above his face.

“Are you hungry, wolf?” She asks him.

“Starving.” He whines, wanting to taste her.

Her grip on his hair pulls him towards her, finally bringing his mouth to taste her sweet cunt. He can’t help but look at her as he eats her. Her nose and cheeks are so red from the cold, all he wants to do is warm her up. His large arms have a hold on her thighs, his fingers resting between them. She pulls off his gloves, letting his fingers grip into her warm legs.

She moans and whines in ecstasy. The sound turns him into a wreck, clawing and gripping at her thighs to the point he draws blood. She doesn’t even care, relishing the sweet pain.

She pulls and tugs on his hair so harshly, forcing his face so deep into her cunt. If he even thought of stopping, she’d kill him herself. She grinds her hips into his tongue, crying and whining into the cold air. It seems as if everything has gone silent, even the winds, the world around them stopping to hear her sweet ecstasy. He moans her name into her cunt every time she pulls his hair, wanting to be her release. He’s desperate to taste her release, she’s desperate to give it to him.

Cregan, the man he was, never having been with a woman so lust driven, couldn’t help but urge his own desires to see her writhe in his arms. One of his hands left her bloody thigh, grabbing a cold chunk of snow to rub against her warm cunt. She gasped at the feeling, whining from the cold. He rubbed his fingers against her sweet spot. Her nails dug into the arm still on her leg, moaning his name as she finally let herself go onto his tongue.

He swallowed every drop, only wanting to taste her sweetness for the rest of his life.

When she came down, he shoved her off him, mounting her and positioning himself between her legs.

Her body was growing red from touching the bitter snow, but it seems like she hadn’t even noticed.

Cregan wrapped his hands around her throat, leaning in and giving her a deep kiss. “I could kill you right now if I wanted, get this whole mess you’ve caused for me over with.” He whispered into her lips.

“You won’t.” She whispered back. “Not before you get to even fuck my sweet cunt.” She reaches her cold hand down, snaking it into his breeches and rubbing his length.

“You’re right.” He kisses her again. “I want all of you.” She unlaces his breeches, pushing it down along with his soft clothes.

She glides him along her wet entrance, and Cregan groans. He pushes himself into her, eliciting a sweet gasp from her lips. He gives her no time to adjust, immediately thrusting his hips back and forth.

She moans, tears brimming her eyes, having never been fucked by a man so large as Cregan.

“What? Why are you crying? Never been fucked like how you deserve?” He growls. She does nothing but nod.

“Nothing?” He asks. “Have I finally shut you up?” He fucks her harder, and she pulls on his brown curls, using her other hand to scratch all along his back. Cregan loved the thought of it, coming home with battle scars from her. He kisses her jaw, licking her salty tears.

He stands and picks her up, worried about the cold getting to her skin. He pins her to a tree, her back scraping against the bark. It hurts in such a sweet way, better than the cold snow. She cries out his name so loud as he fucks her against it. His hands roam her body, wanting to feel all of her but also wanting to warm her up.

“Tell me it true, Cregan.” She moans, her naughty attitude returning with a smirk. “Are you going to kill me?”

She knows his answer before he even does. He growls as a response, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of knowing that sweet cunt bested the Lord of Winterfell.

“I hate you.” He growls, fucking her even harder so she shuts up. “You killed innocent men.”

She laughs and moans at the same time, “I killed crows, My Lord.” He moans at ‘My Lord’ “I’d never… fuck… harm an innocent man. That’s why you’re here now, fucking my dripping cunt.”

He wraps one of his hands around her throat, the other holding her up, his thrusts growing sloppy as he nears his peak. “Fucking witch.”

To his surprise, her hand finds his throat too, but he loves it. He loves her aggressiveness. She matches him, she’s practically a savage wolf herself.

He wants to pull out, knows he should pull out, but he can’t find the strength. All he can focus on is the wetness surrounding his length. His hands grip her waist in such a harsh way it’s bound to bruise, and he relishes in the thought of marking her so those other wildlings knew she was his now. He had claimed her, and any other man who dared try to touch her would meet the Gods.

He grabs her and pushes her back into the snow, falling on her hands and knees. His hand takes a grip in her hair, pulling her head back toward him and forcing her to arch her back. He fucks her in such a shameful way. If any lady in Winterfell were fucked like this, she’d nearly be a whore. But she was not a lady, so he felt no guilt fucking her how she deserved, and how she eagerly wanted. Her hips bucked into him, matching his rhythm.

She cried such sweet moans at the pleasure, finding her peak so close. Her fingers spread into the snow, shaking, and she released onto him again, and he growled, fucking into her until he found his own peak.

His spilled into her so deep it touched her womb. She rested her face in the snow, panting. He pushed her off of his length, her body falling into the cold. Cregan stood, out of breath, staring down at the woman in the snow, her body curled into a fetal position as she laid there catching her breath. He was hooked. Obsessed with her beauty and madness, even as she laid there sweaty and cold.

He grabbed his furs and sat beside her, pulling her into his lap and wrapping the warm furs around her.

“You might catch a chill.” He whispered, slightly worried now that their lust had subsided.

“I’m a witch, right? My blood runs with fire.” She breathed. He laughed softly.

“I think that’s the first time I’ve ever seen you smile, Lord Stark.” She smiled, a soft and sweet smile. His heart nearly melted.

After dressing, they began walking again.

“Can we make a quick stop?” She asked, not letting him answer before she ran towards a cave in the not far off distance.

He sighs, not making an effort to chase her.

He walks into the dimly lit cave. It appeared lived in. He eyed the area, while pulling at his collar, due to the heat in the cave.

“Is this where you live?” He asked, his voice echoed back to him, making him feel alone.

She nodded, undressing herself again. “It’s a hot spring.”

She jumped into the water, moaning at the warmth. He twitched.

“You gonna just stand there lookin’ pretty?” She asked, her thick northern accent appearing. He sighed, slowly taking off his furs and armor before stepping into the hot water. She spit some of the water at him with a little smirk. He tried to hide his smile, but couldn’t. He grabbed her arm, pulling her towards him and into his lap. She curled her legs up and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Let’s stay here.” She said, voice unsure. “You’re a wolf. You belong out here, not in the south.”

He took her hand in his. “My place is in Winterfell.”

“Then stay with me just for tonight.” She said. He sighed, pressing a soft kiss to her hand and nodding. She rested her wet head against his chest.

“I won’t cause any more trouble for you, Lord Stark.”

He sighed, knowing what it meant.

He yearned to bring her back to Winterfell, to give her a place in the castle, and to take her in his bed at night, but she was too wild. She would cause too much trouble for the servants and handmaidens. She would never be happy either.

He made it count, fucking her over and over again in that cave. When they slept, he held her close to him, refusing to even let her roll over. Her head fit perfectly against his neck. It felt like a crime to let her go.

———

They had been walking for three days to return to the wall, only growing closer and closer with each moment they spent together.

“I thought you said it was a day’s journey.” Cregan said.

“On horse.” He shot her a look, frustrated with the forgotten mention. She only smirked. He didn’t want to part from her just yet anyway.

“Lord Stark!” A voice yelled. He quickly pushed her behind him, unsheathing his sword and searching for where the voice came from. He was terrified for her, but she showed no fear. He knew if they seen her, they would kill her immediately.

4 men in black, all on horses trotted up besides them, encircling them.

“Gods, I can’t believe it.” The Lord Commander said, “You Starks, damn it. You put the rest of the North to shame. I can’t believe you found the witch.”

“I’m not a witch.” She said, but Cregan only grabbed her and wrapped his hand around her mouth, preventing her from starting a fight. She kicked and growled into his hand, but eventually submitted.

“Why is she still alive, m’lord? You should have taken her head the moment you found her.” A boy said.

“It’s not that easy. She’s strong, more useful alive.” Cregan said.

She kicked her foot back into his shin, stealing his sword from his hand. Cregan yelled and grabbed his leg. He grabbed her arm with his other hand with a harsh grip. Her elbow met his face, knocking him on the ground as blood pooled from his nose.

“Took you long enough to find your own way back here, crow.” She said, looking at the Lord Commander specifically, the heavy valyrian steel sword dragging from her hands onto the ground.

He only snickered at her.

“Don’t hurt yourself trying to lift that sword. I’d rather watch Stark behead you himself.”

“Can’t do your own dirty work?” She sneers.

Cregan sensed the tension but said nothing. He stood and grabbed her by the back of her neck, pulling her back and taking his sword from her. He stared her down, breathing angrily, his eyes fuming with rage. He wanted to take her on the snow again as revenge for breaking his nose, but restrained himself.

She looked back up at him, anger in her own eyes, his hand lingered on the back of her neck.

Cregan turned back around to face the Lord Commander. “I will not behead her. She is a prisoner of Winterfell.”

The Lord Commander fumed. “She’s killed half our men-“

“You killed half your men when you sent them searching for me.” She spits.

“Enough!” Cregan yelled, but she ignored him. She broke from his grip and ran at the Lord Commander. The horses spooked, bucking the other men off them and scattering.

She jumped, using the stirs of the saddle of his horse to mount it. She pulled out the dagger she stole from Cregan earlier, and slit the Lord Commander’s neck.

Hot blood spewed onto her face as he weakly grabbed at her throat. She smiled, that wicked smile again, licking the blood that spat across her face, her eyes wide with madness.

“Goodnight, crow.” She whispered.

Cregan ripped her off the horse, throwing her onto the ground.

“Do you understand what you have just done?!” He screamed at her. She smiled up at him, blood staining her teeth. She kissed him, the blood on their faces smearing. He briefly matched her love with the kiss, before pulling away.

He tried snatching the dagger back from her, “No, it’s mine!” She yelled.

He pulled her by her collar close to his face, “You have to go now… or I’ll kill you.”

Sadness swept across her face, her lip trembling like a scorned child.

“Keep your fucking dagger, then!” She yelled, stabbing it into his shoulder.

Cregan cried out, letting her go, and falling to the ground. He ripped the dagger from his shoulder. She used this as an opportunity to take her bow back from his body.

She reached into her boot, pulling out an arrow. She knocked it and drew it back. Cregan weakly jumped on the Lord Commander’s horse. The other Night’s Watch men were returning on their horses, having calmed and gathered them.

“Back to the wall!” Cregan commanded them. He didn’t turn to look at her. He knew if he had, she would’ve shot the arrow right through his eye. Instead, she hit him in his rib, perfectly hitting where it would hurt, but wouldn’t kill him. Cregan yelled in pain again.

The men rode off, not stopping until they made it to the wall. Cregan passed out multiple times on the way, visions of her flooding his thoughts as the men had to drag him to the maester.

She stayed in the same place for hours, sobbing and sobbing, as the icy cold froze her tears. Only when night fell then did she turn and leave, knowing she would never see the Lord again.

[stellarspecter]

STWG daily prompt 8/2/24: hanahaki

wc: 737 | pairing: pre-steddie, platonic stobin | read on ao3

this takes place in a world with chronic hanahaki! so it doesn't kill you, it just makes you kind of sick for a bit until it becomes requited or you get over them. most people end up getting it at least once in their lives.

“Got a crush, dingus?”

Steve stares at the retreating back of Eddie Munson, jingling through the aisles as he juggles his car keys and his stack of newly-rented movies. “...You can't prove anything.”

Robin snorts. “The fact that you need to say that is proof enough.”

“No, it's not,” Steve pouts. Is he really so obvious?

“It literally is.” Robin rolls her eyes. “What's so special about him anyway? He's a drug dealer who looks like a wet rat. I didn't think that was your type.”

Steve sighs. “It's… not,” he concedes. “I think my type is passionate nerdy brunettes.”

Robin wrinkles her nose. “Ew.”

“He's not ugly or anything!” Steve cries. “He's cute. His hair could use some work, but his eyes are… so brown. And his lips…”

“Don't say so pink,” Robin groans.

Steve clears his throat instead of laughing. “Well, they are very pink.”

“Showstopping. Unexpected. Incredible. Who could have seen this coming,” she deadpans.

“Okay, so I'm not a poet or anything,” Steve gripes, “but I'm not wrong, either. There's just something about him…” He trails off, thinking about Eddie's smile, the way his eyes sparkle when he gets to talk about his music, the little flourishes he adds to every movement. Everything about him is captivating to Steve, and he just can't get his mind off of him.

“Ugh,” he hears Robin groan over his thoughts. “I'm not gonna stop hearing about Munson for a while, am I?”

“Not if you keep hanging arou—” He's cut off by a vicious cough. He keeps trying to clear his throat, but something's stuck in it and he can't get it out. Maybe part of his bagel from breakfast? Gross.

He keeps coughing, a concerning rattle that doesn't cease until he spits a few petals on the counter.

He and Robin stare at them in silence.

“Looks like he's not going away anytime soon,” Steve says weakly. His head thunks down on the counter, just inches away from the spit-soaked petals.

“I cannot fucking believe, out of all the people on this earth, you have hanahaki for Munson. Munson. Threepeat senior drug dealer Eddie Munson.”

Steve stays folded over, mentally going over every interaction he's had with him, because hanahaki? Really? 

But he's always fallen easily, hasn't he? It's not like it's his first time with it. He'd gotten it almost every year since seventh grade, infatuated with classmate after classmate. Tommy and Carol always made fun of him for it, but he couldn't help how he loved.

He just didn't expect this time to be Eddie Munson.

“Like I said,” he starts, peeling himself off the counter to meet eyes with Robin, “I think he's cute.”

She just scoffs. “You know I'm never gonna stop making fun of you for this, right? This is literally so embarrassing for you.”

“You know, I thought I'd end up getting hanahaki for you,” he casually tells her.

She gasps, her mind immediately taken off of Munson. “No!”

“Yeah,” he confirms with a sheepish smile. “I didn't, I think cause we got kidnapped before I got too serious about it. But I really expected you to be my hanahaki crush for that year.”

She's silent for a moment. “You know, I can't decide if that's endearing or concerning.”

“Decide on endearing, please,” he says, and she snaps her fingers.

“Done. Now, back to Munson.” 

Steve lays back down and despairs that the topic change didn’t distract her well enough. “Do we have to?”

“If you’re gonna get over your case of hanahaki, then yes,” she tells him.

“If I ignore it for long enough it goes away,” he mumbles.

“Or if you ask him out, it’s either requited and it goes away or he rejects you and it goes away.” Robin’s too smart for her own good, Steve thinks. He doesn’t think she’s even had hanahaki yet. “You know I’m right, dingus.”

“Why do you have to be so good at logic?” he grumbles, but turns to peek at her anyways.

She rolls her eyes and gets her arms under his armpits, hauling him upright. “Get it together, dingus, we’ve gotta figure out our plan to woo Munson and cure your hanahaki. You with me?”

“I’m with you,” Steve says. He presses his hands over his eyes hard for one, two, three seconds, then takes a deep breath and meets Robin’s gaze. “Okay. Let’s get these flowers gone.”

dividers by saradika-graphics!

[bisexualcage]

Stunt Work | Johnny Cage x Trans Male

Pairing: Johnny Cage x Male Reader (trans male/masc)

Summary: you’re a stunt double working on one of Johnny’s films, he’s annoying to work with and you think you both mutually hate each other…at least you thought.

Warnings: NSWF! 🔞 MDNI!!, mentions of afab anatomy, there’s almost no plot but I tried my best so it’s a little layered.

Word Count: 3.2k

A/C: I didn’t really proof read this a whole lot, so ignore any errors pls <3

Part 2 here <-

“Alright, Cage, you gotta commit to it man stop flaking— grab his shoulder, flip him over and leg lock.” The director instructed Johnny who was shirtless, sweating and in an overall fussy mood because he couldn’t for some reason commit to performing the stunt on you all the way.

“Hop off my sack, man. I’m trying.” Johnny breathed heavily.

“If I may-“ you tried to put in a word of advice but it was quickly shut down.

“Listen, G.I Joe, zip it-“ Johnny barked, all cocky.

“You both been acting like cats and dogs all day, cut it out!” He yelled and then turned to Johnny, “What’s gotten in to you? You’re literally a martial artist, an actor, and you keep stopping at a simple leg lock?” The director whispered at him, patting his back.

The director not reprimanding his shitty behavior and only talking about his stunt block made you scoff loudly.

Johnny gave you a brief look before looking away and shaking his head, “I know I am, I’m the best there is— I’m Johnny Cage for god’s sake.”

“That’s the spirit! Now, another take! We’re gonna get this!” The director yelled.

You rolled your eyes and got to position, as well as Johnny getting in to fighting stance in front of you.

“Action!”

Johnny started throwing his moves at you, you dodged them successfully and then the sequence he struggled was next. He grabbed your shoulder, flipping you over on to the padded floor harshly which made you groan, and then finally performing the leg lock on you— extending your leg between his thighs on the floor as you grunted. You thought he finally got the move down until you felt something firm against your thigh as he kept it in a hold. You hesitantly look down and notice that between his legs was a rock hard erection making you go completely still and your eyes widen. Of course, he noticed your reaction and he immediately let you go and stood up with an embarrassed look on his face. A blush covering his cheeks as his shades hid part of his face.

“Way to go, Johnny! That’s my boy!” The director yelled.

You got up from the padded floor and cleared your throat, a heat coming from your neck. Not really looking at him as you were ready to run off set to your trailer.

“Are we done?” You look at the director and ignore Johnny’s flushed face.

“Yes yes, go ahead and take your breaks.” He patted an immovable Johnny’s back.

Without even a second thought you rushed to your trailer, a bunch of feelings and thoughts flooding your head. You were confused as to why you felt an attraction to the asshole, you were supposed to hate his guts, right? But now, since it’s pretty obvious he didn’t wanna do a leg lock all day was because he didn’t wanna reveal the rock hard boner he got in that position with you it made any rationality of in your head vanish.

An hour passed since you were trying to relax in your trailer, that is until you heard a few firm knocks on your door making you jolt and walk to it.

“Listen, if the stunt needs more rehearsing I might shoot myself-“ your words caught at the back of your throat as you saw a showered Johnny in front of you with a raised eyebrow and an amused expression.

“Easy, G.I Joe. It’s me.” He grinned at you.

“No- we ain’t doing this shit. You cannot just knock on my door with a smile and expect me to forget how much of an insufferable dick you’ve been.” You went to close the door on his face but he shoved his foot in and firmly moved his way in.

“What the-“

“Unclench your ass, I just need to talk.” He walked in with his hands in his pockets, he was wearing slacks and a navy blue dress shirt with his usual shades.

You slam the door closed as you turn around and near him, “The only reason why I’m letting you in is because I need this damn job— I would have kicked your ass by now.”

Johnny smirked, completely not phased by your red angry face, taking his shades off and looking in to your eyes with his big brown warm eyes. “Listen, I know I was a bit of a dick but I like you despite our quarrels on set. It’s an eat dog eat dog world out there, baby.”

You scoff loudly, “Baby?”, a redness in your face.

Johnny walked around your trailer, looking at your room and decorations on the walls. “Never had anyone call you pet names huh, stud?”

You shake your head and follow behind him, “Forget that. Why the hell did you have a boner when you did a leg lock on me?”

His cocky smile suddenly falters as he turns around to meet your eyes, his face uneasy. “That’s what I came to chitchat about. I’d appreciate if you didn’t go around to gossip about that. It wouldn’t be good press.”

You laugh dryly, “So you didn’t come to explain yourself but rather save your ass?”

Johnny rolled his eyes, “I’m a star, I don’t need any bs like that getting out there you understand? Plus, do you honestly think I could have controlled what happened?”

You shake your head, “That’s not the point. You know how many accidental boners I’ve experienced while doing stunt work? There’s friction when doing stunts it happens, it nothing perverted, But all of the actors I’ve worked with have apologized, just out of decency.”

Johnny actually stayed quiet, pondering on what to say, “I’m…I apologize. You know, I don’t usually apologize— I’ve been so out of it today and you being around just messed with my focus.”

You approach him more, “You’re blaming me for not being able to perform a stunt? I was distracting you?” You say bitterly.

“I’m not blaming you. Only explaining. I- I didn’t want to do the stunt all the way because I knew the second I got you on that leg lock…you’d feel it.” He looks away, a hint of vulnerability for the first time all day.

You sit down on a chair, taking a deep breath, “It wasn’t the friction.” He continued, looking at you with a certain emotion that you couldn’t quite tell what it was.

“What-“

“It was you. Moment you walked on set.” He played with the rings on his fingers, a more serious look on his face.

There was a warmth that overtook your body, a shock. “But-“ you were cut off.

“Just let me get this out alright, G.I Joe? I know what it looks like; ‘Johnny Cage getting a boner over another guy’, it’s not ideal for my image. It’s not ideal for Hollywood if it got out that their poster boy for masculinity, heterosexuality and womanizing was…not necessarily that all along.” He swallowed deeply now, sitting down next to you and looking away.

“…I guess you’re more layered than I thought. A dick with shades of gray.” You say, trying to be somewhat lighthearted at the rather shocking truth.

Johnny chuckled softly playing with his hands, “I am a dick sometimes, that I don’t deny. But the truth is, most of what people see is a facade— As most publicity of actors in hollywood is. I was raised in to this industry to fit a certain mold and you do it long enough you sort of become that regardless…” he trailed off, now looking at you, “As corny as it is, I haven’t felt a more genuine attraction in years.”

You blush, taking a deep breath, “So, have you always liked guys? Or is this something…new?”

Johnny thinks deeply, “Always. I get with anyone really. I’m an actor, of course I’ve gotten with dudes.” He grins at you, a hopeful look in his eyes that urged you to elaborate on your own thoughts.

“I guess we finally found some type of common ground Hollywood, I’m pretty…fruity.” You cheese.

“You are..?” His brown eyes turned to a dark color suddenly, a sort of hungry expression in his face. “And you…fancy me also, right? I see it in your face…”

You take a deep breath, “Careful with the ego but yes.” You chuckle, “Think I was…quite mad that your little slip up on set didn’t turn me off.”

Suddenly you feel his hand on your knee, his thumb grazing over your pants, “Come on then stud…we both want it.” He says in a deep husky voice.

A shiver runs down you leg, “Isn’t it unprofessional to get involved with- with coworkers?”

He chuckles, “Oh sweetie, unprofessional is my middle name.”, he glided his hand up your thigh now, studying your every expression as he did.

“Good point…” you breathe faster, a warm feeling festering in your lower abdomen.

“Shhh…shhh.” He whispered, “Let me just…I’ve been harboring a boner all day because of you, we’re doing this…” he trailed off, his hand now reaches the button on your jeans undoing it.

“Wait I-“ you stand up in a slight panic, “There’s something I gotta say before we proceed…”

Johnny raised an eyebrow at you, confused and stands up with you, studying your face.

You start pacing around, “I’m trans. A trans guy. I just wanted to say something before we-“

Johnny chuckled softly, a relief on his face, “Sweetheart, I thought you were gonna tell me something horrific.” He touches his chest, “Don’t worry about it, stud.”

Your face turns amused, “Are- are you sure you know what I’m saying?”

Johnny approaches you now, rubbing the back of your neck with his warm hand, “You’re a trans man, I understand. But a man nonetheless.”

You grow goosebumps as he touches you, “That doesn’t bothe-“

“It doesn’t, This is Hollywood baby, you know how many different folks I’ve gotten down with? I got you.” He now made his hand trail down your chest, rubbing it passionately.

Your breath hitches and you become warm all over, his hand then trails down your abdomen to under pants, his hand reaching the waistline of your briefs. Pulling you close against his chest with his free hand, “Now, come here, be a good boy…” he kisses your lips for the first time firmly, all warm and wet.

You sync your lips with his and hum against his mouth, a groan leaving his throat the deeper he went. Sliding his hand in your briefs now, rubbing your crotch up and down making you moan against his mouth.

“Fuck…” you hiss, making a grin form on his lips.

Johnny then suddenly slips his hand out and starts undoing your pants, but before he pulls them down he looks in your eyes for approval. When he sees that you nod with a gulp he immediately pulls then down to your knees leaving you in your briefs, “Don’t worry, honey…” he whispers as he cups your jaw and kisses you on the cheek. He pulls back while gently guiding you to the couch, your back against it as he finishes pulling your pants off. There was a primal look in his eyes as he crawled between your legs and was on top of you, his chest laying against yours as he leaned in and kissed your neck desperately.

“Shit-“ your breath wavers, your skin hotter than the sun.

“Mmm- taste so good-“ you heard a groan leave the back of his throat, he then trailed his hands down to your hips and gripped them tightly. “You okay? You ready?” He looked in to your eyes for any hesitation— as cocky as he was you saw an undeniable softness in them now. A want to please, a want to do something for someone. The way his eyebrows quirked up slightly waiting for your answer, like a kid looking for some sort of validation. For someone to tell him yes and that he’s doing well. It made you reconsider everything you knew about him so far. Maybe he was just a man desperately trying to look for connection in an otherwise soulless industry that broke people. He wanted connection, he craved it— he wanted realness with someone.

You nod, rubbing his sides tenderly. He closed his eyes briefly at that, sighing deeply with a small smile on his lips. Then, he reached the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his shirt, immediately going to unbuckle his belt and his pants. At a point, you saw he was struggling to get them off, maybe it was nerves, maybe it was frustration, so you sat up sightly between his legs and reached up gently to his belt undoing it with ease. You later unbuttoned his pants as well, but giving him space to take off his pants on his own. Johnny stayed completely quiet when you did that small act for him, observing you with a want that grew tenfold but with a side of that softness he emitted no matter how hard he tried to hide it. Big brown eyes like chocolate itself.

You chuckle up at him, “What, Hollywood?”

The actor snapped out of it, shaking his head, sliding his pants down and throwing them to the floor with the other clothes. “God, I wanna fuck you.” He said bluntly, taking his boxers off now, his dick in full view and without any hesitation going back between your legs, touching the hem of your briefs with his fingertips and with a sudden halt.

“Johnny, it’s okay…” you look down at him with a shy yet flushed face.

Johnny nodded, a grin back on his face as he used both of his hands to slide your briefs off— your heart accelerating at how slow he was going. He finally slid them down your legs and immediately his vision went your throbbing pussy— like an inevitable reaction. The actor licked his lips as he positioned his thighs and hips accurately, leaning over you. He looked in to your eyes as you felt his burning cock hitting your inner thigh, teasing your entrance.

“Hnnngh-“ you groaned, almost desperate now as you moved your hips against him, a trickle of sweat down your temple.

Johnny let out a chuckle as he placed his finger below your chin to look at him, “I ain’t even in yet handsome…take a breather.”

“Don’t tell me what to do you ass.” You chuckle and playfully slap his shoulder.

Johnny smirked at your behavior, reaching down between his legs and grasping his length that was oozing with precum already. Positioned it at your core and carefully slid past your folds with his hips— carefully studying your face as he laid down over you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders.

“Ahh-“ you moaned softly, digging your fingers in to his lower back…trying to push him faster inside.

“Easy…easy….” He said with reassurance, his mouth agape as he finally made it all the way in making him grunt as he felt your walls clenching around his cock.

Johnny then took no time nuzzle in to your neck as he pulled his hips back slightly and then rammed in to you with no warning, making you let out an earth shattering groan against his ear. His arms locking around your waist tightly now as he held you against him like you were air itself and he’d die without it. There was a slight tremble to his body the more he rammed in to you.

“Jesus- fuck-“ your eyes grew a bit watery as you cursed, a coil already tightening in your lower abdomen while you tried to gain your breath.

“Oh- Wrong J name, baby-” He moaned with a bit humor beneath, peppering your neck and jawline with kisses as his buckling against your wet tight pussy became more frequent.

It was a cumulation of moans, groans, curses and senseless phrases between you both. You noticed his face was flushed, his cheeks pink as he pulled back a bit to study your face. “That feel good, sweetheart? That feel- Fuck-“ he whimpered, and it was the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. “Answer…” he continued, with a stern tone now.

Your chest heaved faster as he picked up his speed, “y- yes, god- so good-“, your hands gripping his lower back more as he pushed in and out of you.

“You’re gonna take it like a good boy- mmm, sweetheart-“ He groaned as he grabbed your hips now more harshly, you could tell he was close as well the way he became more direct and possessive. A constant harsh rhythm was formed by his hips, his dick reaching in to the deepest depths inside as he hit your g spot over and over with no mercy. With no breaks or signs of stopping, you whined loudly and shook— feeling your height coming.

A the coil inside you soon snapped, making you whimper as you reached your climax— coming all around his swollen length. Johnny leaned in to your neck, moaning against it as he came right after you— his warm come filling you up to the brim.

“Fuck- fuckkkkk-“ he groaned as he bit down on your neck and then licked alongside your jaw.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you held him close as you tried to come down from the electricity that was currently running through you both. Johnny then reciprocated… sighing loudly, still inside you and wrapping his toned arms around your waist not caring how sticky and sweaty you both were against each other. He was content of sorts, a small smile playing on his lips, closing his eyes against your chest as he listened to your quick heart.

“You okay, Hollywood?” You rub his back tiredly.

Johnny chuckled lowly, “I feel like a million bucks, baby.” He leaned in and took a long sniff of your neck, “I love how smell-“

“That’s sweat, don’t patronize me-“ you laugh, your face red and full of embarrassment as you realized he hasn’t made any attempt of moving out of you.

“Oh shush— you have a musk. You might get me addicted, sweetheart.” He rubbed your sides now, his hair sticking in all directions.

You snort loudly now, rolling your eyes at his charming yet annoying behavior, “Okay fancy pants, can you pull out of me? I need to pee, I don’t want a UTI!”

His eyes widen at the realization and he carefully pulls out, “Oh- oh I apologize, stud. Next time I’ll remember-”, the actor says apologetically and stands up with a slight tiredness, carefully helping you up as you wince.

“You’re getting pegged next time that’s what.” You say humorously with a grin as you walked to the bathroom in your trailer and he walked behind you like a lost puppy.

“Oooh, challenge accepted, G.I Joe!”

[writingstoraes]

begin again 🌷 (split pt. 3)

pairing: charles leclerc/fem!reader

type: instagram imagine, social media au

notes: the long awaited part 3! this took so long only cause i had no idea how i want it to go lol anyway i hope u guys love this one :D lmk what u think!

about: almost a year after your split with charles, fans take a trip down memory lane and wondering why the two of you seemed to have watered things down after soft launching other people months ago. a bunch of rumors also set twt crazy along with speculations at your paddock appearance where you apparently support ferrari.

read: part 1, part 2 (can read on its own, but the parts provide context hehe)

yourusername

liked by isahernaez, lilymhe, landonorris, and 231,298 others

yourusername back at the happiest place on earth ❤️

lilymhe Have fun, love xo

yourbff Looking that good just to watch a race????

tyretactics QUEEN I ALWAYS LOOK FORWARD TO YOU EVERY RACE

charliez1655 miss mam twt is on fire we all miss you 😪

leclercsluv wdym shes almost always at every race ricciardoshooey no they meant w charles lol

yourusername recently added to her instagram story!

Now playing: Charles Leclerc, 2023 Austrian GP, Post-Sprint Shootout Interviews

yourusername

liked by yourbff, lilymhe, carlossainz55, and 210,593 others

yourusername on a wednesday, in a cafe, i watched it begin again

lecslover looking GOOD AS HELL QUEEN

sainzplaylist god shes back to the man shes been soft launching i think i am going to be: sick

1655lecs that might be charles, we don't know 🙏 sainzplaylist yeah i think its time we let that go lol

wagsqueens mam im sorry wym by begin again???

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, finemidnights, carlossainz55, and 982,221 others

charles_leclerc It's nice to have a friend 🌅

tyreexpert u cant tell me thats not y/n 😪 she's his friend after all...

joris__trouche Looking sharp!

lecssainz16 war is over you guys theyre back at it i am in my acceptance stage now

Some months later...

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, lilymhe, and 756,293 others

yourusername i am and willl always be your number one fan. words cannot encapsulate how proud i am of you; truly, you deserve all of this and so much more. congratulations, my love ❤️

it's nice to see you running towards me again :)

ps. yes we've been soft-launching each other the past months hahaha

leclercfan AM I DREAMING SOMEONE PINCH ME

livwatchraces i screamed when i saw you guys on the screen!!!

carlossainz55 Aaand they're back 🎉

charles_leclerc Thanks, number one shipper

charles_leclerc

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen, arthurleclerc, and 1,982,384 others

charles_leclerc Sunshine in human form.

A few months ago, I started hanging on to the fact that in good faith and in good time, things will eventually work its way out. Almost a year ago, it seems as if we have closed a chapter but today, we are living proof people who are made for each other can begin again.

Ce sera toujours toi 🤍 It will always be you.

scuderiaferrari We missed you tons, Y/N! ❤️

wagsf1 the queen of all queens is back we love to see it

lecslover it's years later and he still talks about her the same way he always have 🥹

sainzchamp The way theyve been soft launching each other all this time and that one rumor of Charles being with another girl was still Y/N 😭

yourusername sold our apartment already? too bad 😆

charles_leclerc I never actually sold it, if I did, I'd probably buy it back

---------

tagging: @slytherheign, @honethatty12, @siovhanroy, @mehrmonga, @mess-in-side, @leclerc16s, @thelovehypothesis, @dakotali, @aldene-styles

notes: eeee and its finally done! cant believe it took so much time before i finished all three parts lol anyway thank you so much for those who waited for the part three (i see all the asks on my inbox and the comments ehehe) i really just didn't know how i wanted it to go so! i hope you guys love this and lmk what you think <3

[cerastes]

I’m thinking of how, in OpRec 2, Laurentina knows she has very limited time as herself before her brain deteriorates and she loses her reason again and becomes the “Specter” again. She has few precious hours as herself after years of being trapped in her own mind due to the experiments and the insane amount of pure liquid Originium Amaia and Quintus injected directly into her spinal cord.

She uses a bit of this time to spend it fighting a battle alongside Misery (who insisted she doesn’t need to help him but definitely welcomed the aid since apparently the situation was pretty bad), because in fighting, she can remain useful, in her own words. Skadi insists she hurry back to Rhodes Island, to which Specter says it’s pointless, because equipment on the surface simply cannot help her, only keep her alive, so she takes her sweet time fighting alongside Misery, and Skadi and Gladiia (the latter reluctantly) join.

She allots some more of her time to having a proper talk with Closure, answering as many questions as she can, both about herself and about Closure, but mainly, what she wanted to say was “do not change the way I’m treated. You know me as Specter, you have protocols around the Operator Specter. Retain them. I have to go.”

She talks with a very concerned Skadi and an unflinching but still upset Gladiia, but she already had time with them on the way back. The final person she wanted to talk to before her brain gave out again? Doctor. Explicitly because she predicted Closure and Doctor may take more care on her handling, maybe remove her from combat operations in order to more closely monitor her condition. This is exactly what she didn’t want.

Because end of the day, Laurentina is a Hunter. She finds it difficult to speak as surface dwellers do, she finds it almost nonsensical, and so, she demands, “Keep me in the fight, Doctor. We do not need words, we need only you having a clear objective and me, my orders. If you put me in a bed and out of the battlefield, you are denying me the last shred of identity I can cling on”.

Because she couldn’t sculpt, she couldn’t sing, she couldn’t even control her own body, if she was even conscious. The only thing that she could do to cling to being who she was...

...Is to at the very least be pointed towards an enemy to fight them, and pointed towards an ally to protect them.

Skadi believed Laurentina had died prior to the events of the game because this isn’t the first time she had done this: In order for the 3rd Squadron to advance towards Ishar’mla, the 2nd Squadron, Gladiia and Laurentina’s, practically sacrificed themselves covering for the 3rd. 

She never blamed Skadi, and makes sure she knows it. She didn’t mind doing it again now, either. “Point me at the one I have to cut, put the ones I need to keep safe behind me, and give the order. Even if am completely lost in the darkness of my mind and madness of my heart, that, that will never leave me. That’s proof that I am Specter, that I am Shark, and that I am Laurentina. I, namely, I.”

As far as she knew, these were the last words she’d ever get out as herself. She used to make it very clear: “Do not deny me the only bit of purpose and identity I have left, because even if I am but a shell of myself, I’m still me.”

Of course, we now know that this was not to be her final fate, and she did manage to regain control, decisively, eventually, but... As far as she and Skadi and Doctor knew, at this point, this was really, really it. The briefest of encounters with the real Specter, on borrowed time. And her intent? To make sure she’s not left to rot in a medical room where she’s useless, gathering dust: “Put even more danger upon my share”. You know you are dealing with a seriously terrifying and strong person when they can confidently tell you (and have verifiably, so far, done as much) that even if it’s just a shell of her former self out there, she can and will never stop doing exactly what she’s good at, because otherwise, at that point, she truly has left the world.

[rentenwins]

silly little excuses (newneighbour!leehan x reader)

ch 1 • ch 2 • ch 3 • ch 4

synopsis: the boys catch onto what's happening. with a ittle jab and detective skills, and nothing that the ever-so-helpful taesan would do anything about it...

content: banter banter and banter!!, the bnd members <3, mild cursing, a lot of dialogue tbh, descriptions of food eating, taesan is a schemer ong, taesan and sungho are a cheeky duo, a very clueless jaehyun, woonhak n riwoo mention!!

a/n: this one is goofy... calm before the storm trust me on this one pls. if you would like to be part of my taglist to get notifs on a new chapter, please send an ask in my inbox <3 my updates are not the most consistent apologies :( but thank you for sticking around nonetheless!

wc: 1448

taglist: @haechology @jenuinne @saintriots @badaspookie @yveol @yunextdoor @lailols @rawrbamgyu @amarecerasus @pandorahearts19 @luvvhaerin

chapter 3: i got a plan

“Bro, I’m being so serious.”

“Proof or it didn’t happen.”

“I LITERALLY CANNOT SO JUST TRUST ME ON THIS ONE.”

Jaehyun seethes at Sungho across from him. The boys were at their usual outdoor cafe table, just outside the university. It was a miracle that they would get the same table almost every week.

“Woah, woah slow down. What’s going on?” Taesan suddenly appears and nudges Sungho to make room for himself at the table.

“Sungho’s not believing a word I say—“

“Believe it or not, it’s quite easy to.” Taesan replies nonchalant before Jaehyun gets a chance to defend himself.

“Oh my god, Taesan I will kick your ass.” Jaehyun groans while Sungho almost chokes on his drink and Taesan smirks.

Jaehyun was observant, but he was amazingly dense too. He was intelligent, but a bit too much speculation causes an inability to recognise the obvious in front of him. This was one of those cases.

After you had left Leehan’s place that evening, Jaehyun went over to Leehan’s to drop off dinner from Sungho since he hadn't had the time (or the budget really) for his grocery shopping just yet. So Jaehyun, the loving friend he was, kept the boy company for the evening while he was at it.

Sungho turns to Taesan, “Jaehyun said he found one of y/n’s containers in Leehan’s kitchen. So now he’s a little curious as to how it magically made its way there.” Jaehyun had oftentimes teased you for your mismatching containers, and the one he saw in Leehan’s apartment was definitely yours. Who else would’ve owned a container with a Pororo lid?

Taesan scoffs, “Y/n probably made cookies like she did last time for us. Remember that?” Sungho squints at Taesan before he remembers, “OH! THOSE! That makes a lot more sense.”

Jaehyun waves his arms dramatically in front of Sungho and Taesan. “Hello? What am I missing? Am I suddenly chopped liver to you all?”

“You know? Y/n’s cookies? The ones they make every now and then?” Sungho says, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Jaehyun looks like he’s been smacked across the face. “Why do I not know of this? What cookies are you two on about?”

Taesan rolls his eyes. “It’s y/n’s thing. They probably made them for Leehan since he just moved in and whatnot. Nothing too out of the blue.” Taesan nonchalantly says as he eats a cracker from his bag.

Just as Jaehyun was about to protest about his apparent lack of knowledge, a silent ‘yo’ came from beside him as the figure makes himself comfy in the chair beside Jaehyun.

“Speak of the devil…” murmurs Jaehyun as he leans back in his chair, not loud enough for Leehan to hear but enough for Sungho to almost choke on his drink again. Leehan feels the stares on him as he opens his little blue container of… cookies? Dipped with chocolate?

You loved making cookies for your friends, and Taesan knew it was a way for you to blow off steam. One time last semester, during submission week, you were so stressed that you stress-baked three batches of chocolate cookies and gave a whole load of it to Taesan and Sungho. Taesan had so much he had to give some to his other neighbours, Woonhak and Riwoo, just so they'd still be enjoyed fresh.

And yet, with all the baking you've done, Taesan has never seen chocolate dipped cookies since the day Woonhak started senior high school. It wasn't long ago, but you had sworn that they were 'too messy' and you were 'never going to do it again unless it was as special' as that day.

“Aha!” Jaehyun leaps from his seat, other tables turn to look at Jaehyun’s unwarranted reaction as Leehan almost drops the cookie he had just bit into. Leehan’s bewilderment was understated: he stared at Jaehyun, then at Taesan and Sungho looking amused at his container of cookies. Sungho elbows Taesan and he slaps him back.

“Is there something on my face?” Leehan murmurs, and when no one gave him an answer he took a bite of the cookie. He looks at Jaehyun, who finally sat back in his seat after his mini freakout. Sungho swears he could see stars form in Leehan's eyes as he chewed the sweet treat.

“So y/n’s baking isn’t bad huh?” Sungho breaks the silence, Taesan barely suppresses a smirk next to him.

“Yeah!” Leehan replies enthusiastically, not quite looking up at Sungho. There was a smile that reached his eyes as he spoke, “these really remind me of these butter cookies I used to have back in Busa— wait, y/n?”

This time, Taesan actually laughs. Jaehyun looks on, confused. Leehan turns red, “Hold on... how'd you know it was from y/n?”

If he was an outsider, Sungho would think this mini interrogation was too much. But alas, what’s a little friendship without a little jabbing here and there?

Sungho shrugs and sits back in his chair, “Eh, just a little hunch.” Taesan lightly smacks Sungho's arm.

Frankly, Leehan was stunned and didn’t know what to say. So he did what any other person would do and continued to eat his little cookies and scrolled through his phone. Though the redness in his ears never really went away.

Why did he blush when Taesan and Sungho mentioned your name? I mean, the cookies were good.

“Jae, you good bro?” Taesan eyed the uncharacteristically quiet boy next to Leehan, who seemed to be staring at Leehan’s (read: your) cookies. Jaehyun looked at Taesan, then Sungho, then the cookies again before his eyes went comically wide.

“OH I GET IT NOW!” Jaehyun says a bit too enthusiastically again as he pretends to smack his head with a closed fist, eyes squinted as he finally realised why they were teasing Leehan in the first place.

Taesan couldn’t help but remain bemused as he looked at Leehan, almost apprehensive in giving Jaehyun one of his cookies.

“Hey, don’t give me that look,” Jaehyun playfully shoves Leehan, “just one cookie I promise! y/n’s your neighbour, she could probably make some for you anytime!”

“Then why haven’t they given you any, Jae?”

“Shut up, you nerd!”

———

It was a given that interior design was a pain. Yet here you are, studying interior design in university, where your budget was blown for art supplies, and throwing your pride away so you could walk down the street with unnecessarily large poster boards under your arm.

“So where are my cookies?” is the first thing you hear when you stop at the stoplight on your way back home.

“Your what now?” is your reply to Taesan, who was at the stoplight before you were. You were too checked out from a long day of classes to realise it was him standing there. You threw him an incredulous look.

“Cookies? Butter cookies? Seriously, I didn’t even know you made those. And the chocolate? You hate washing dishes and yet you decide to go the extra mile and dip the damn cookies in the chocolate.” Taesan drawls teasingly in a way that he knew pissed you off the most. You roll your eyes,

“If you’re talking about the cookies he made Leehan, then yes. I made him some damn housewarming cookies dipped in chocolate. You know, get him settled. What’s the deal?”

Taesan laughs a little as he reminisces the scene at the cafe earlier, “He brought some with him today and it was the happiest I’ve seen him. Probably ever, if I’m being real. Or maybe since he's moved here.”

You glance at Taesan before failing to suppress your laugh, “Nice try. Taesan, if you’re trying to do what I think you’re trying to do—“

“Woah, woah! Who said anything about me? I’m just relaying you… some… important information. You know, maybe... to your benefit" He stage whispers the last few words.

“What’s so important about my cookies then?” This is going nowhere. You have never wanted that damn stoplight to turn green so badly in your life.

“I got a hunch. A big one. I suggest you take my advice if you want this to go… somewhere.” And with perfect timing, the stoplight turns green and Taesan walks off.

A hunch? My cookies, neighbour, Leeha—

“Taesan!" The board under your arm almost slips when you take a step forward, " Get bac—my god, we live in the same building. Come back here!”

Taesan decided you suddenly didn’t exist when he walked off (in the most friendly way possible, of course). He pulls out his phone and texts Sungho,

‘I got a plan’

[nonsensical-pixels]

Dear Sims 2 Community,

Or really, just about anyone who does the stuff this post mentions...

Forewarning: this is a LONG post.

For the last few years I've just kinda bottled this rant inside of me. But I've just gotten tired of trying to be patient.

Yes, Abhijeet is a real name--and quite a famous one. Yes, there are millions of people out there with Ng or Wong as a last name. Yes, Pong is a real name too.

Abhijeet - 'victorious' or 'conqueror' in Sanskrit

Ng/Huang (黄）- 'yellow', to 'fall through'

Pong - 'noble'

The same goes for almost every first and last name in The Sims 2's name generator. They're not made-up names just because they don't fit your image of a Western suburbia. In fact, they are taken from the developers' names. Just because they're Asian names, or non-white names, or 'spelt weirdly', doesn't mean that they're 'fake' or whatever or 'weird'.

I am tired of going on Reddit or Discord or whatever and seeing people making fun of names like 'Ng' and suggesting that the developers were lazy to put that in the name generator. Uh, no? 'Ng' is a very common surname for Chinese people--not just in Asia, but in the West too. So either you are being grossly ignorant, or you just cannot believe that Asians exist out there.

As a South-East Asian, I am tired of this whole ‘not-white, not real' logic exercised in this community. Not everyone who plays this game is from the West. As a South-East Asian, it's quite infuriating to see people make fun of names like 'Pong' because they can't be bothered to at least Google the name's meaning.

What I love about The Sims 2 is how diverse the names that townies generate with are. The developers could have left in your average American names and left it at that. Instead, they used their own names, and it's just proof of how diverse the developer team was. If you look at the names townies can generate with, it's actually insane. There are so many unique, rare names on there that people are just... making fun of, because they have this belief that The Sims 2 is an 'American' game and as a result everything should match what your perfect American suburb would have in it.

As if there isn't a whole neighborhood inspired by Shakespearean lore in there where a child has the name Bottom--or whatever.

Maybe I am overreacting a bit. But it makes me so infuriated when people make fun of things they don't fully understand. Without even Googling it. Every other post on r/sims2 is 'Is Abhijeet a real name??' Uh, yeah, a single Google search could've told you that.

In short, I am just tired of the Sims community constantly misrepresenting people like me or acting like Asians in the game are unusual.

It's not just names, too. It's also in appearance, languages, etc. So I've compiled a small list of misconceptions you may want to avoid, because why not, too many people never seem to get them.

Not all Asians are Chinese. I've used Indian and Chinese surnames as examples because they're closest to my understanding (being part Indian, part Chinese) but I see an insane amount of people acting like Indians aren't from Asia or all Asians are Chinese. Same goes for the people who act like all Asians are Japanese. Mary-Sue doesn't have to be Chinese, she could be Japanese, Korean, or not even Asian at all. I am really tired of people acting like my HC that she is only part-Asian is weird.

Not all Asians have light skin. It's not even a regional/ethnicity thing, where Indians are also Asian and a lot have brown skin, etc. There seems to be this idea in a lot of communities that all Chinese must have ultra white skin, black hair, and brown eyes. I have never met a Chinese person outside of actual China who looks like they'd blend in with the snow. South-East Asia is not only chock-full of Chinese people whose ancestors left China decades ago, it's also smack-dab on the Equator. If you can go about your daily activities and stay pale, I am in absolute awe of you.

Not all Asians have 'slint-eyes'. I find this grossly racist and very ignorant, because even that term makes my skin crawl. Yes, some of us have our eyes slanted towards the center of our face. That does not mean that all of us do or that the Korean girl you're making must look like her eyes are sideways.

Not all Asians speak Asian. I have no idea who thinks that Asia, a continent that contains most of the world's population, consists of people who all speak the same language. Asian isn't even a language. You may be thinking of Chinese--which, although having one singular writing system (okay, it has a modern one and a traditional one I can't even read) actually consists of dozens of dialects. Most Mainlanders speak Mandarin, but around my area there are so many people who speak Cantonese, Hokkien, Hakka, whatever. This concept that all people from a continent must be able to understand each other is stupid when you look at the European continent.

I apologise if I've misrepresented anyone on this list--if you are a person and you speak the language Asian, do let me know you exist--but for the love of all things holy, please remember that Asians and non-Western people exist. Some of them made this very game that you play every day, and they'd be baffled, I think, to know that you believe Wong is a made-up name.

I don't mind people who use mods to change up the names used to generate townies and make them more suit their gameplay--if you want a themed neighborhood or one that's all-'American', go ahead. But if you're gonna make fun of someone's actual name because you can't fathom that not everyone has first name John last name Smith, please do educate yourself.

Thank you for reading this very long, very on-the-spot rant, have a pleasant day, and please don't be afraid to ask, comment, or give feedback on this post :]

[drawing-prompt-s]

GoFundMe - Apartment Transfer

Really did not think that I would be making one of these again. But yours truly, Prompt Prophet, cannot catch a break. Every time that I think I am it seems to them just be ripped right back away.

Note: any further proof you require, please contact me at my main, @prophet-rebellion, and I will do what I can to show you.

$400/$400

Links:

GoFundMe

PayPal

Venmo

Please note that this following update means that anybody who wanted to send additional funds for my current roommates cat - Do Not. I want nothing to do with her. Her cat did nothing but after all this I am done. Not funds had been sent for that cat yet but they had been inquired about being a possibility.

----------------

TL;DR - my apartment that told me they were moving my nightmare of a roommate with something called a forced transfer, then apparently reversed their decision (despite documentation) and did not tell me. The only way for me to get out now is to pay a $300 Transfer Fee + Applicable costs to get out as soon as I can. Giving up the apartment I have lived at for almost 2 years now.

The full explanation I gave is under the cut.

Please note I do not want to be doing this, and as soon as I hit $400 the GoFundMe is getting closed. People are struggling enough right now and I hate asking for monetary help when I know this much.

But god, for the sake of myself and my cat I cannot do this. I can't live here with her anymore, but I can't break my lease either.

FULL EXPLANATION (copied from GoFundMe):

Many of you know me for raising funds regarding my cats, either in the search for one of them as being missing, or more recently to raise funds for the other for ear mite treatment.

We reached the full goal of ear mite treatment within 24 hours of the fundraiser being set up - and it feels wrong in a sense to add the funds to that GoFundMe. The Ear Mite treatment is still happening and I fully intend to post an update photo of her at the vet there when I can.

However, to this end, so much as I do not want to be asking for help.

Living with my current roommate is hell. Cut and dry. She is vindictive, rude, loud, and confrontational. Her own cat has a tendency to attack my own and has on many occasions. This roommate was moved into the apartment in June, I have been here for more than a year and a half.

I will save you most of the story because there is an incredible amount, honestly, and I have cried more than my fair share today. My body is threatening more tears as I work through writing this now.

Incredibly important note: one of my old roommates is moving back in, she is a good friend of mine. However, given all that my current one has done, the original roommate refuses to move back if the current one is still present. I cannot blame her as the actions of my current roommate have driven me to locking myself in my room 24/7, along with my ESA. I wish that this was an exaggeration. It is not.

The brunt of the situation comes down to this:

We had mediation, my current roommate and I, and it was about as useless as you would believe it to be.

Nothing changed, in fact any things reverted back to the way they had been or seemingly got worse.

I went to speak with the property manager one-on-one to bring the full story to light along with evidence to backup what I was saying. I completely broke down at this point in time. I cannot break my lease, I cannot escape my current roommate - I am caged.

What was decided in that meeting was that they would be performing a forcible transfer of my roommate - she would be moving to another apartment, same layout, same size room, etc. But out. We would then phase my soon-to-be roommate back in (she had not originally renewed her lease because she was going to be gone for some time). This meeting was on Friday. I was told by the property manager that the following Monday she was going to have a meeting with my current roommate and inform her of this. The whole process would supposedly take about 2 weeks. (It should also be included that my current roommate has had multiple violations of her lease which I had documented). This decision was then further documented by an email they sent to my soon-to-be roommate stating that upon her arrival into the apartment, my current roommate would be gone. So this is an actual documented decision.

The two weeks was almost up and nothing had been heard, my roommate had not packed, etc. So yesterday (October 17th) I sent an email to which I got no reply. Today (October 18th) I went and spoke to the leasing manager (different from the Property Manager, whom is ranked just above her). the LM had no idea what I was talking about. She then spoke with the PM, who I had met with and called me back.

Apparently, the Property Manager, in her meeting the following Monday decided that actually we would continue to live together. My current roommate would no longer be moved out. This sudden change was not communicated to myself or my soon-to-be roommate who was refiling her lease under the impression the issue would be gone.

No curtsey to respond to my email, no honoring a DOCUMENTED decision. Etc. Just radio silence to me.

The only two options available are this - since they are now also giving my soon-to-be (hopefully) roommate a hard time about her income.

1. Myself and my soon-to-be roommate are moved from our original apartment to a different and fully vacant apartment.

(This is the decision we are going with on the grounds that my STB roommate be accepted).

2. My STB roommate does not move in at all and cancels her lease process, leaving me along in the apartment with my devil of a roommate and her cat that keeps attacking my own.

This second option is not sustainable. I am breaking, entirly. I am so tired, and so done with this all.

I do not want to give up where I have lived for almost two years becuase the actions of a vindictive new arrival. But I cannot stay here. If I could break my lease then I would. Because the Property Manager is the highest authority present at the office there is nobody I can go to above her that will hold her to her documented word and honor it. (I did but in a request to the corporation that owns my complex to speak with them about her conduct, but I doubt anything will come of it outside of retaliation).

The reality of option 1 however, is that it is no longer considered a forced transfer. Meaning that i have to pay the transfer fee listed in my lease of $300 plus applicable fees ("convenience" fee and card transfer %). I cannot move apartments until this fee is paid.

Therefore I am setting the amount at $400 to account for the percentage that GFM takes, and the amount that the apartments themselves will be taking on.

I have no set goal for how fast this will be filled, but by God, the sooner the better. I am not renewing my lease and remaining her after it ends in June.

[preyseisgone]

Hi ! This is a callout post on @gloomylace also known as @clingyidol. Before I start , I hate doing these kind of things and it took me alot of effort (+ encouragement from friends ) to do this. Also please do not go and harass Lolita. Cher is a minor and I just overall do not condone harassment. I was originally going to stay quiet .

tw for , abuse , r//pe , violence suicide and more .

Before I start , “weren’t you two just friends ?” Yes but that is until this popped up in my feed. Lolita and another friend are the only two people that know about a situation that roughly happened 2 ~ ish days ago. I was insanely panicked and anxious being accused of stuff like this. I know this is Lolita on anon due to being my ONLY friend in the editblr community and the only one who knows this situation. (besides Avery, Avery isn’t on editblr or the same scenes as me) You know how deeply this affected me. So yeah kinda your fatal flaw assuming I tell my life story to more then 2 people 🤷 also STOP using fucking freyr on me. 🤍 massively appreciated. “An Ex friend” I have only one long term friend and that is Avery 🤍 I am not a fucking freak and copy people , even if I do have identity issues I know it’s weird to copy someone! This is really fucking low of you Lolita and I genuinely trusted you with information and my thoughts and feelings! But no you went behind my back for no reason. It seems like you wanted a reason to turn on me. 🤍

First of all , Lolita said this ! At the time , I did not know anything about oyasumi punpun . I don’t willfully consume media with the following topics

I am massively triggered by almost ALL of those topics . I felt like I was being essentially compared to an abuser , which overall made me feel very, very icky. When confronted about this - ( as seen in the images below )

Lolita ignored me . Cher has done this to another friend of cher’s , making an uncomfortable joke and then when confronted went on a dni and days later replied with something random . Lolita cannot take responsibility for cher’s actions. Che just ignores you essentially and then replies with something random! I am just sick of this behaviour and I will not be surprised if che or someone else will spread rumours about me JUST because I came out about this. I originally thought this wasn’t serious enough to be a call-out post and I felt like I was being overdramatic.

these two screenshots ^ .

multiple people (including me) have had their mental health DRAINED due to your actions. You have lied multiple times. It’s also such a coincidence that hate anons seem to follow you around and when asked you blame it on your exes ? In reality you probably sent them and you sent someone into a really bad episode! You make baseless claims off of little to no proof, broke SEVERAL boundaries of one of your ex partners. You also compared one of your bfs to someone who abused you which is just! plain! fucking wrong. You claim to have high empathy / sympathy and yet when someone who is also mentally ill did not react well over small things you went to shittalk them to their boyfriend.

props to you if you defend a liar and someone who makes nazi jokes xx lying about your exes stalking and harassing you is fucking crazy! Also sent my personal messages to someone and talked shit about me so yeah !

@artistrydoll + @magnoliawriter please reblog if you see this . ^_^

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

You considered what happened at the tower as her shutting him down? Even with all that, Miles isn't phased and that reassurance from Miles brings a smile to her face and she affectionately leans on him

Honestly? That's a good point, because there is merit to this part of the conversation as well.

As always, I think we need to examine the context from the bit that happened before, because the set up really speaks a lot of about the rest of the experience.

So let's start with this interaction of Miles and Gwen, because the first time I saw it hit me hard.

This situation hit me because by knowing Gwen's background, you can understand exactly where is coming, and it makes it hurt even more.

Miles is conflicted about his secret identity, specially with his parents, who are understandably pissed off (I may do an analysis on that, is not ghostflower, but I think there is some stuff worth pointing out.) And let me be clear here, I do think Rio and Jeff should know, I think while they could freak out, it can work out.

But honestly Gwen's reaction is so natural having her said anything else would be weird.

We don't know how long has been since she saw her dad, but considering she confirmed months, and how her hair as grew since the beginning scene to this moment, it has indeed been awhile. And I don't fault for refusing to come back even after all this time.

Her dad tried to point a gun at her, even after she took her mask away; after everything she has been through, after begging him to listen, there is no words to describe how much that must had hurt. How this society, with all the spiders they have, with Jessica Drew, Hobie and Miguel, still cannot fix that.

So is natural that she quickly tells no to Miles, she doesn't want to him to live that, and she may not know them, but she never thought her dad would truly be afraid of her and look at what happened. I can't blame her for it.

What caught my attention, however, was what she did next.

She decides to sit upside down.

Now, you probably had hear before that a lot of things there is a second meaning behind certain shots in movies. In animation that goes even harder considering how you need to work things from scratch, and as wonderful as it is the shot of Gwen going upside down, I think they were going for something more than beauty.

By Gwen doing something like this, is going to somewhere a regular person could never go, what a regular person couldn't attempt to do without risking their life.

I think this choice is very deliberately because at this point, being spiderwoman is all she has.

She needed to leave the life of Gwen Stacy when she left that night, her school life, her old band mates (who in the comics are her friends and we can see saying hello in the flash back of the dance), her dad, is all gone.

Yes she is learning so much, she is happy to have Jessica as her mentor, she really things she is doing something good here. But I also thing she is clinging to this all the harder because she doesn't have much else in her life.

Yes she is happy with Hobie as her friend and plays in his dimension, but you can see that isn't enough. We can see proof of this later.

This also means getting away from Miles' sight, almost like hiding, and yet not far enough he cannot come to get her.

Maybe I am getting a bit too sentimental here, but this is a good example of the rest of the scene, push and pull, she thinking they can't, but wanting so much to do so.

I am not sure how much Miles meant that, since I think he still looks conflicted earlier. Regardless, something that I like about this, is that he listens to her.

He knows Gwen is in a very painful position, and while he has good reasons to believe his parents are different, he doesn't try to fight it. And more than that, I think he actually takes into consideration her words and tries to see it in a different light. A softer one.

I had seen some people say Miles is the sunshine of the relationship while Gwen is gloom and doom, and while I still think that is oversimplifying their situation too much, this moment shows a bit of that, and also, another reason why Gwen likes talking to him.

I really like this detail, I think Miles being able to make a situation less grim is something that I think Gwen feels is like Miles place in her life, to make things that used to hurt her (being spiderwoman, since she liked it but it has made such damage to her life,) actually made her happy again.

Also, look at the space between them; I think this shows even more than Miles is conscious of the type of pain Gwen was when she decided to climb here, and he gets back to her, but gives her space just in case.

Of course Miles cannot help but boost himself, though you can see that he is trying to make it sound almost like a joke. I wonder if his uncle would be proud at his attempts of being smooth, because while not perfect hey, they are working for Gwen.

Because regardless if she thinks is a good joke or not, she did laugh.

And I think after Gwen having her cool for most of the time, seeing Miles get a bit more confident is sweet, and also some progress showing that he has indeed feeling surer of himself.

I think Gwen knows she is kind of encouraging him to continue.

I like to point out that Gwen looks back him while saying this, almost like indicating that hey, we are still talking dummy, you don't need to stay back.

Back again, Gwen wants her distance, wants to use the mantle spiderwoman and the powers that come with them to not face the rest of the world; but she also makes sure that Miles can get to her still.

Miles obviously, doesn't know Gwen's feelings, and I don't think he realized how much her time with him has meant for her; and in this scene shows.

Including how he asks again, if she really means it.

And decides to get closer to her when she repeats it.

Once more, maybe is me looking for things where there aren't any, but I think is a nice touch that Miles gives Gwen his space, and she still reminds her she is here for him, and is all he needs to close some of the distance between each other.

It's funny, at first I thought I didn't have anything to say about this particular exchange, except that now that I see it in slow-motion and after analyzing the other scenes, it does feel that it carries more meaning.

Because in this scene, Gwen attributes that part of the reason she likes to talk to him, is because there isn't a lot of people they can talk about being super heroes, and Miles agrees.

Which if you think about it, it has a point, the reason why they met, and also got along so well, was for being spiders. We can see it in the bus, of how Gwen is having fun talking with Miles and actually wanting to preserve that moment with him.

Yet, that isn't the entire story, now is isn't?

Man I wish I could get the entire clip, there is so many little things. The looks Miles gives to Gwen, how Gwen tries to not look at her but she continues smiling and briefly looking at his direction.

But it does bring an important point, that is not the entire reason they get along so well.

Gwen had the opportunity to met other spider people, including teens. Peni is in the society, Pavitr, Margo, Hobie, a lot of Peters- unlike Miles, who has been on his own for this year and few months, Gwen had the chance to met other spider people, to get other friendships with people who understood.

And yet she is still here, having this conversation, claiming how is different with him.

Even after having so many possibilities to met other people, to have other people to talk about this, she still wanted Miles.

Just like us, he caught onto that; and we know why he is asking, he knows why he is asking, and Gwen probably too.

The conversation is still pretty light in tone, Miles is throwing away a piece of debris that he picked from his suit (huh wonder if he was just taking dirt out because he nervously was picking his suit,) Gwen is still smiling. We all knows what they are truly hinting here, but no one is saying it.

Sure hun.

But seriously, I do wonder if Gwen is also thinking about that. Like I doubt she isn't aware of her feelings for Miles, she certainly is aware of his, and the way they interact is layered by their crush in every interaction.

What I am curious of, if she wonders why is Miles the person she is still thinking about, how not a band was enough, how the spider society isn't enough, that she is still here having this conversation even when knowing she should be doing a mission.

This last panel certainly makes me think in that direction, that she is still wondering, what Miles has that she can't get out of her mind.

Gwen is still thinking, trying to get the words, but Miles seems pretty sure of his choice.

And I think she likes her explanation too.

Miles says that they are the same in the important ways, and what Gwen says next almost seems to make it believe she agrees.

Because her next words are a confession, or as close as we get in this conversation full of metaphors and second meanings.

Sorry, I try to not go crazy with so many images, but I think every frame is important here.

First the subtle happiness of Miles hearing that, of knowing what it must mean if Gwen is telling this to him, here and now.

How she looks back at her, almost like he needs to confirm what he heard, and when he realizes she is still looking at the horizon, he looks down at their hands.

And he tries to get closer.

Once again, slowly, letting the chance to go away; as always, Miles tries to respect Gwen's space and let her dictate the tone.

And she doesn't miss in what he is trying to do.

AAAAAND I realized I got to the maximun number of images on a post (oops.)

Sorry anon for basically not answering your question, but I got too deep into this ramble for me to delete some of it now.

PART 2

[romancingromanoff]

Secrets & Sketches

Andromache the Scythian x f!reader

I decided to create a series of loosely related one shots for Andromache (my beloved). Here’s part 1 and part 2

Summary: You were always staring at her, not knowing she was staring back.

TW: None?

Word count: +5,100

Author's Note: Hi y'all. Here's some slightly domestic fluff before the action happens and the stakes skyrocket through the roof.

Despite never having lived with four strangers before, it turned out that your new situation offered you far more privacy than you had ever experienced while living with your mother.

The woman had a compulsive need to control every aspect of your life, from what you wore to what you ate. You were barely even safe in the bathroom. The years had taught you to lie with your words and carefully crafted smiles. Knowing what she wanted to hear from you and how you could appease her temper was like mastering a second language. Your skills in the craft became more and more refined throughout the years and your confidence ultimately grew. But you underestimated your mother and made the greatest mistake of them all.

“I know you’re lying to me! What are you trying to hide from me, you ungrateful whore?”

A picture frame nearly collided with your head, chipping the door frame instead of scratching your face. The glass shattered on the floor and your body jumped twice, once at the sound and another time when your eyes settled on the damage and found that your favorite childhood photo with your grandmother was destroyed. 

“Whatever you did, I will find out! You cannot lie to me, I am your mother!”

It was one afternoon you had wanted all to yourself to go see the movie Roman Holiday after school. The charismatic Audrey Hepburn, riding on a Vespa with the largest smile you had ever seen, caused strange feelings to stir in your stomach when you had first watched the trailer. She was a princess masquerading as a commoner in order to freely experience the wonders of the Eternal City. Oh, how you envied her character. Your mother, however, could only focus on how short her hair was. The shortest your hair had ever been was when you were a fresh newborn. Once it grew past your upper back, you were never allowed to cut it, despite all the other girls you knew being able to short styles. 

“How disappointing.” She scoffed when a clip of her getting her haircut played. “Such a beautiful young woman and she wants to make herself look like a man? I really don’t understand your generation, you’re all confused.”

When you arrived home late that evening, she refused to believe the lie you had produced about giving some tutoring lessons after school. It was only two days later that she found the proof she wanted. While snooping through your journal she came across the movie ticket you had pasted next to your latest entry. She burned the entire thing as only one portion of your punishment.

How your mother could predict your actions, anticipate your every move, and see through every single one of your lies you did not know. It was like she knew you and how your mind functioned but could never truly understand how suffocated you felt by the twisted ways she expressed her “love” for you. She was your mother, the closest kin you had left after your grandmother’s passing and the woman that had known you for your entire existence. The fact that she birthed you was one she’d never let you forget, yet you knew she would spend your entire life trying to mold you into something you weren’t if she could. If she could never accept you then how could anybody else?

Then you met Andy, who always seemed to be in tune with whatever you were thinking. Hell, she could practically guess your thoughts word for word without even really trying, yet not once did it ever feel like she was violating your mind as your mother had. You were almost completely certain that she was fully aware of the times when you were drawing her. It was impossible not to see the art in her movements. She’d be doing something mundane yet slightly active such as washing the dishes and you’d pull your sketchbook out. The moment you put pencil to paper she would slow down ever-so-slightly. A plate that needed maybe two wipes suddenly took four or more to clean. She must have known what she was doing to you, softly smirking as she folded laundry 

But did she know what it was doing to you? How intensely you felt about her and as more than just an art subject, more than someone you merely admired. Pages full of sketches, varying in detail and design, became dedicated to capturing the alluring domestic side of the ancient warrior. Every angle, every shadow was carefully reconstructed (to the best of your ability anyway) as if to preserve each moment and time so that your eyes may never forget what she looked like chopping onions on a rainy Tuesday evening. A brief moment that might be incredibly insignificant for a being that has walked the earth for thousands of years, but one that was still so precious to you. The time you spent together, even the moments everyone else might consider to be dull, were filled with color all because of her.

Why she allowed you to draw her so frequently was something you couldn’t quite figure out. This rather untraditional dance the two of you engaged in was never spoken about in words. There was no doubt that Andy would have said something much earlier had she been uncomfortable being drawn by you. A part of you enjoyed entertaining the idea that, perhaps in some small way, Andy might actually return your feelings. But at the same time, you didn’t want to be wrong and come off as an artistic creep trying to invade her privacy.

The good thing was you never had to worry about any of the others looking through your sketchbook. The one time Joe had asked if he could take a peek it hadn’t even crossed your mind that you could have said ‘no’ to him. But the smallest bit of hesitance that he had seen in your eyes as you prepared to hand over your most personal and sacred treasure immediately stopped him.

“Y/N, you don’t actually have to show me anything if you don’t want to. I was merely curious but no part of me would be offended if you want to keep your art to yourself. I will always respect your privacy first.”

His words were almost foreign to you, like ones you had only ever read on pages and later discovered were pronounced completely differently when you finally heard them spoken out loud. Still, you knew Joe meant everything he said. Though all of your new companions were certainly capable of it, none of them had ever once tried to deceive you or keep you hidden from the truth. Previously living with a pathological liar had taught you all the signs you needed to know and not once had you found a single one since joining the old guard.

It was a bit startling how safe you already felt with these few strangers you had only met a few short weeks ago. You could talk to all of them about (almost) anything, although you did worry that your endless amount of questions might annoy any one of the unnaturally older beings. Sometimes you nearly cringed at the thought of how ignorant and stupid you must have appeared in their eyes. It mostly motivated you to contribute where you could. Cooking and cleaning were not tasks you necessarily enjoyed, but it felt nice to make some type of contribution to the team. Still, you longed to prove yourself as something more, to help save lives and make Andy, Booker, Joe, and Nico proud. And maybe, just maybe, if you became worthy enough of someone like your rescuer, she might look at you differently.

┊ ┊┊ 

It was nearing morning hours and your endless thoughts hadn’t allowed you to sleep yet. There was a buzzing in your body, making it impossible to fully relax, even though you knew you had a busy day of training ahead of you and you needed the rest. You tried to conjure up the comforting sound of Andy’s steady heartbeat as you imagined her lying next to you, only to grow even more anxious when you began feeling guilty for indulging in such thoughts. 

Did she even like women the way you did? You certainly had your suspicions and noticed the way her heart seemed to break anytime there was a mention of Quynh. The necklace that never left her neck also appeared to hold a great amount of pain and significance to her. But even if you were right, Andy had never brought up any details regarding her love life and you were determined to respect that undiscussed boundary. The tossing and turning was just an unfortunate side effect that eventually had you cave in and get up to grab a drink from the kitchen. 

“Can’t sleep?” The voice of the very person you had been thinking of came from behind you as soon as you had turned on a small lamp. You let out a nervous laugh and kept a steady hand on your chest when you caught her smiling directly at you. It made you take some extra time while getting your glass of water so that your heartbeat had a chance to settle.

Andy sat at the bar sipping on a mug of coffee. Even with the light being so dim, you didn’t need it to tell her beverage was completely black. 

“I still don’t know how you’re able to drink that. Every time I try it it’s like trying to swallow hot liquid dirt.”

“Really?” The Scythian chuckled and you prayed the darkness would hide your melted expression. “That’s surprising considering how you drown yours in milk and sugar.”

“Hey, we can’t all be as tough as you.” 

“No one said you had to be. No one said you weren’t already.” You supposed you were tough in the context of being able to override death itself, but besides that, it wasn’t a character trait you ever considered yourself to have. Even the immortality thing was basically a fluke. 

The dark haired woman gestured for you to sit down and you awkwardly lowered yourself into the chair across from her. Your glass of water looked silly standing next to her more refined drink. “Yeah, that’s me. I got tough hands covered in paper cuts and callouses from drawing.”

“Art is tough for a lot of people. It’s tough for me. I could never quite get the emotional vulnerability part down and I feel like all the best art pulls from that. I would say you could probably teach me a thing or two about drawing but you have something more inborn than that. It can’t be taught.”

“But you’ve never seen my work?” Had she? You didn’t think she’d go through your things without your permission but there was definiteness in her tone that told you her words were true. 

“No,” she shrugged. Nothing in her seemed to waver. “I don’t need to. There’s this look you get in your eyes when you’re completely focused on drawing that seems to transport you to this different world. I always wonder where you go but don’t want to tear you away when you’re clearly inspired.”

You had been staring at her for so long believing that she was merely tolerating your strange behavior. You assumed she simply felt unbothered. The idea that she might have been secretly staring back never once crossed your mind. 

“You… You watch me?” A beat passed and your brain short circuited, unsure of what kind of answer you even hoped to hear. If she did then was it with the same unspoken desire you held in your heart that you could be worthy of her one day? No, it had to be something far from that. Your awkward, uncoordinated behavior could only be considered entertaining at best if Andy didn’t find you pitiable. You imagined it was like watching your neighbor’s beagle after they arrived home from a medical procedure at the vet. The poor thing was so loopy yet unaware that he couldn’t walk in a straight line. Every few steps he took he’d also crumble to the floor before eagerly trying to get back up and making another attempt with the same results. That’s what she must see whenever she saw you trip over your own feet. Or how silly you looked the other day when Booker tried to show you how to hold a pistol and you shook so hard that it fumbled out of your hands.

Even with all the time in the world, it was a struggle to see yourself ever truly earning your place among the rest of the guard one day. You not only lacked combat experience but had been thoroughly sheltered from the world by your mother. She hadn’t allowed you to participate in any sports, not even the more feminine ones like dance or golf. The result was barely being able to do a push-up and having the wind knocked out of your lungs after only a brief jog. 

The others had started you off with some basic self defense techniques, which caused you to wake up with sore muscles you hadn’t even known existed. Everyone was extremely patient with you, stressing the importance of slowly building up your strength and reminding you that there was no rush to suddenly reach their skill level when they’d been fighting for longer than some of the strongest empires had lasted. But then you’d watch them training together or listen to one of them recount several of the missions they completed while you were stuck waiting in the safe house. They were out there saving lives, as well as literally sacrificing their own, while you could only hope to one day do the same. 

In the back of your head you could hear your mother berating you for having such ridiculous dreams. If she could see you struggling to learn a pull up she would certainly laugh at your miserable attempts. But Andy didn’t look at you like you were “perfectly pathetic” as your mother often described. No, she seemed to stare at you softly, which made you feel like you were the only person she was thinking about. 

“I find you interesting. More specifically, it’s been a pleasure to watch you grow into yourself these past few weeks. You look much more relaxed.”

You were fairly relaxed, aside from the fact that your heart was currently threatening to jump out of your chest. Or if physicists could somehow harness its energy then it could power the entire world. She had just admitted to finding you interesting and you were supposed to answer back in words. You took a painfully slow drink.

“Well, it has been nice being able to make my own decisions and not have someone constantly looking over my shoulder.” You think back to an instance where you were recently baking a lemon glaze cake for the team and some icing stuck to your fingers. Immediately, you went to wash your hands as your mother would have insisted upon when it occurred to you that she no longer had control over you. Licking your fingers after that had never felt so satisfying. “Even the little choices I’m able to make now are kind of exciting. Is that strange to say?”

“Not at all.” Andy shook her head. “It’s a beautiful thing, seeing how far you’ve come in such a short amount of time. Not to mention how glad I am that you feel safe enough around us to be yourself.”

A pang of guilt ran through you. What must she think of you if you were keeping cryptic drawings of her a secret? “I really do, which is why I don’t want you to believe I’m trying to hide things from you! Not forever, at least. I trust you, and perhaps it’s more than I’ve ever trusted anyone else. But with my drawings… I suppose it’s rather complicated and I’ve never willingly shown them to anyone before. They’re nothing inappropriate, though! I would never do anything like that.”

Before you could completely melt into a puddle of despair, Andy reached for your forearm, anchoring the two of you together while helping to calm you down. Her hand was warmed from holding her hot mug.

“Hey, it’s alright, I trust you too. You don’t need to explain yourself to me. I’m flattered about the drawings and it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I can wait until you’re ready to show them to me when you feel comfortable doing so.”

It was completely vexatious how patient Andy could be with you, or how she always seemed to know the right thing to say to make you feel better. She possessed the ability to soothe the fears you understood intimately along with the others which you had tried to suppress and nearly forgotten about. You simply weren’t used to being treated in such a way. 

“How are you so patient with me all the time?” Your question came off more irritated than you intended, making you cringe inwardly. You weren’t even sure what you were really asking about.

In the few moments it took Andy to start processing the question, your thoughts finally began to come together and spill out all at once.

“I’m deeply appreciative of how understanding you’ve been, don’t get me wrong, but when I imagine myself in your position, it must be frustrating. You do so much for me, all four of you do, but you especially. I’m always needing your help with countless things even though I have nothing of use to offer in return. You’re all incredibly worldly people, capable of doing more than I ever have even before your first deaths. I’ve been kept sheltered my entire life and probably wouldn’t last a day on my own. Having me join the team probably feels a lot more like babysitting than anything else, yet you never complain about it.”

Even though you knew it wasn’t in her nature, sometimes you wished she would allow herself to be angry with you. Or if she even expressed the slightest bit of irritation then that might make you feel better somehow. You waited for Andy to tell you that you sounded ridiculous, or to make another comment about your tendency to overthink things. Nothing like that ever came.

In one swift, breathtaking movement, her hand carefully tilted your chin up towards her face so that you were caught in her stare. The skin of her thumb was rough and her green-blue eyes bore into your own, tender yet determined as they searched for something deep in your soul. Though her touch was completely innocent, it was also intensely intimate from your perspective at least. You wanted to bear your entire being to her, consciously preparing your mind and body to take in whatever words she was about to say.

“Y/N, listen to me. There is nothing you owe me. Relationships aren’t transactional and I enjoy being able to help you. You also didn’t choose this life and I can’t hold what you don’t know against you. I won’t lie and say patience comes to me easily. Truthfully, when you get to my age everything is frustrating. I’ve seen… far too much in my life aside from any type of explanation for it all and it has made me bitter. But you don’t deserve any of that and I don’t want to be that type of person anymore. I don’t ever want to turn my back on people I care about again.”

Her eyes glossed over with the hue of a haunting memory, something from her past clearly bothering her. She let go of you in the crest of the emotion and you nearly whimpered when you lost her touch, but found the rare opportunity to offer Andy the comfort she needed. 

“I may not know much in the grand scheme of things, but I know you’re not bitter. Truly bitter people try to tear down everyone around them because there’s nothing misery loves more than company. You’re nothing like my mother, she wanted to control me and keep me trapped in a life where I could never have my own happiness. You set me free. Anyway, it would be hard to live as long as you have, see the things that you’ve seen, and not become discouraged with all of the wickedness that has happened throughout history. What matters is that you’ve continued to fight for others that wouldn’t normally stand a chance on their own. If you were actually as bitter as you think, you could turn your back on everyone without a single care in the world. I see how much you care for others, Andy. Bitter people only care about themselves and I don’t see how you can believe you’re one of them.”

The fact that you were so young was partially why Andy felt the need to hold herself back and take things slow with you. Although your life would never be normal, she wanted to give you the chance to choose your own path and chase whatever dreams you fancied. Right now, it was crucial to prepare you for the world and to teach you how to keep your shared secret safe. But she knew you’d want to adventure out on your own at some point, and that you’d probably want to experiment with other partners closer to your age. Andy was aware of the baggage she carried, as well as the fact that the nature of your relationship meant she held a type of influence over you. She would never allow herself to take advantage of you like that.

But one thing she couldn’t let you do was downplay yourself, not when your words touched her in ways she hadn’t felt in thousands of years.

“Do you really believe you’re of no use at all and have nothing to offer? Y/N, I’ve traveled to every corner of the world and met the wisest individuals that still led directionless and unfulfilled lives. They thought of themselves too highly, pushed others away, and in the end their knowledge meant nothing when they were unable to make meaningful connections. You have all the time you need to perfect your knowledge and learn every skill that exists or will develop in the future.” 

Your head tilted in perplexity. 

“What? You think we had phones or electricity back when I was growing up? I didn’t learn how to drive a car until late last century. It was really like the blind leading the blind in those early days.”

Imagining a Victorian era Andy accidentally crashing a motorized carriage or angrily shaking her fist at experimental drivers from atop of her horse was certainly entertaining. You wondered if the two of you would ever share a similar experience together.

Temporarily distracted by your smile, Andy nearly forgot the importance of the message she was trying to convey to you. 

“Y/N, you’re right that you’ve never really been given the chance to grow before all of this. None of that was your fault. The wonderful thing now is that you’re on your way to becoming smarter, like anybody else can when given the right tools. What you already have, your emotional strength and intelligence, is far more rare and valuable in my eyes. You teach me to look at things from a different perspective even when I’ve felt stuck in my ways for hundreds of years. Don’t overlook how much of an impact you can make or how much we all appreciate you.”

“Andy… I… Thank you.” You try not to cry, though you know she wouldn’t judge you if you did. Viewing your emotions as a strength is something that you never considered before. They were always a weakness back when you experienced nothing but misery, and now everything couldn’t be more different. Your new life was full of evenings spent getting tipsy and laughing at the stories your friends told you of places and times that sounded unreal. It was wanting the taste of more, the promise of the adventures that lay before you and the people you would get to share them with. It was a life you could hardly believe was real and you got to spend every single day with a woman that made your heart race with a single smile. Even if she never felt the same way about you, there was no chance that you’d trade your time with Andy for anything or anyone else. “Thank you for everything. I’m glad I get to experience all of this with you.”

She almost let her resolve crumble upon hearing your words. The grip around her drink tightened, heating up her flesh to a tender sting but she persevered through it. She knew that if she touched you again then it would all be over. There would be no way she could let go.

“As exciting as everything can be, I can’t help but feel nervous for what’s to come. I worry that no matter how hard I train I won’t be prepared. No matter how much I learn, there is bound to be something I overlook.”

How right you were.

“One thing I can tell you is that there are some things you’re never ready for, even if you spend centuries preparing. People, history, and almost everything I’ve encountered follow some type of pattern maybe 99% of the time. But all it takes is that 1% chance of randomness to make life unpredictable. Even the most meticulous of plans can end up going sideways. At the end of the day, I always ask myself why I’m here or why certain things happen and I’ve never been very close to an answer. There are questions I’ve carried with me for even longer than I can remember.”

It would have been quite terrifying to hear those words from anyone else besides Andy. If she still struggled to figure things out then you were practically cursed to be clueless for the rest of your existence. Although strangely enough, it was actually comforting to hear that she shared a similar sense of existential questioning. Both of you were human even if your lifespans or biology no longer were. 

“Okay, but you must have a guess for when we’ll see flying cars at least. Or do you believe people will really be able to walk on Mars one day?”

A smooth attempt to cover up her broadening smile by lifting her coffee up to her mouth might have gone unnoticed if you hadn’t been so enamored by each one of Andy’s actions. She had a harder time hiding her eyes, which playfully rolled at your question. 

“Sure, I suppose it’s possible. Hey, maybe you’ll be the first one and you can tell us all about it.”

“While the prospect of accomplishing something you’ve never done is intriguing, I wouldn’t want to do it without you.”

The words left your mouth, leaving only your pair of eyes holding hers throughout a deep silence. It wasn’t often that Andy looked like she was at a loss for words but this was definitely one of those times.

Quickly, you tried to cover up your confession with a stupid excuse. “I mean if there really are man-eating martians up there they’ll want to eat you first. You have way more muscle.”

“Right,” Andy laughed in agreement. “I guess that’s all I’m good for besides being a model for your artwork. Are you fast enough to draw me up there in time before I get turned into alien food?”

“Maybe.” You blushed and tried to go for Andy’s move to cover your face with your cup, only to realize that it was practically useless when it was made of glass. 

“I, uh, really wanted to get some sleep tonight before waking up for early training but I guess I’m not doing a very good job at that.”

“Sleep in, you deserve the break. You’ve been pushing yourself really hard and should get to sleep in for once. There’s no need to overexert yourself.”

“Wait, aren’t you leaving for your mission around sunrise?” Andy was planning to look for some intel in the city and you knew she might be gone for up to a few days. “Wake me up before you go so I can say goodbye.”

For a moment, all the Scythian can do is try to memorize the look on your face, wishing that she could permanently sketch the vision on paper like you could. You gazed up at her with such innocence and devotion in your eyes, as if she was simply running to get milk from the grocery store the next morning. The team had actually glossed over the more important details about Andy’s assignment and what it would entail. It wasn’t that you were unaware of Andy’s brutal past and countless killings, but you still had yet to witness such violence. She couldn’t help but worry that witnessing that side of her would not only change how you saw her, but also influence your own self perception when the time came to take another life yourself. It was painful to imagine the countless amount of years you might spend plagued by inner turmoil, hating the person you would become even if it was inevitable. She’d die in a million more excruciating ways if it would shield you from such a curse.

“Andy, are you alright?” Your voice of concern brought her back to the present. There was a slight look of worry between your furrowed eyebrows that she wished to smooth out herself, but she practiced self restraint. 

“Sorry, I guess I’m a little tired too. If you want me to wake you before I leave then I will.”

With a satisfied smile on your face, you nodded and rose from your seat. The urge to ask Andy if she might join you tugged at your heart. You always slept more soundly when it was in her arms. Your nightmares were much more infrequent by now and it had been some time since you had been able to fall asleep while breathing in her scent, snuggling deep into her chest. The temptation to voice your request was almost impossible to resist, save for the fear of jeopardizing your friendship and making her uncomfortable by revealing your feelings. 

Eventually, you found yourself back in bed alone and replaying your conversation. One specific realization you couldn’t get over was that Andy had undoubtedly expressed some type of interest in the art you made of her. Sure, it’s possible that it might have been in a completely platonic sense, but you held onto the fantasy of it meaning something more and decided you’d keep it to yourself, for now.

[submalevolentgrace]

Hi! I hope you're doing well :) please don't stop talking about how prosthesis limbs suck and your experience with them! I'm in medical school right now, and I thought it was amazing to read because it highlights 1. how doctors need to listen to their patients 2. Wow doctors kind of suck and patients should be able to advocate for themselves, and if they can't do that, someone should! And 3. Patients shouldn't be pressured into doing things they don't want to do. For me personally, I kind of already had those ideas, but your posts really put it into perspective and just emphasized them and I'm really appreciative of that :) last thing (promise) I was wondering if you've seen/read Dororo! One of the main characters (Hyakkimaru) spends the majority (like 90%) without arms, instead having sword attachments that are covered with fake arms. I was wondering if you had seen it/him and had any thoughts. If not, it might be something to check out! Thank you again :D

so i showed this ask to my girlfriend, who knows me (and my trauma) very well, and she said: "I would recommend NOT googling that character, that's for sure. this is almost the exact worst kind of thing someone could mention you check out! I wont go into detail but it's also the exact example of taking a disabled person and "fixing" them back to normal that you were talking about."

so, you're already off to a bad start i'm afraid.

listen. if you have any scraps of empathy and compassion and belief in patients' autonomy left, hold onto them, guard them, and fortify them against the education you're going through. med school will try to crush any compassion and empathy you had out of you. residency will grind your humanity for your patients down to nothing, you will be encouraged to stop seeing them as people, and your colleagues will train you to believe that you are right and know what's best, and patients are wrong and lie and are a danger to themselves. you will be taught that patients advocating for themselves rather than blindly listening is an annoying interruption to you trying to save them, or maybe even proof that they are a risk to themselves and cannot be trusted. you will be exhausted and frustrated and angry, and you will be faced with a patient who rightly believes what's best for themselves is something you believe is harmful to them. will you have enough compassion, empathy, and belief in patients' autonomy left to respect them as a human being, as a person?

you have to understand where i am coming from. i have a serious condition that's been misdiagnosed twice, forced onto treatments i didn't want, and denied treatment that would help me because of my "attitude", and once a diagnosis is on the records no doctor will consider any other possibility, so i have suffered without care for years on end. i have been sexually assaulted by doctors in their treatment rooms, and then told that's impossible BECAUSE they are a doctor, and doctors are good.

i have had surgery performed on me against my consent. this is not uncommon for disabled people. it was not necessary to save my life. i advocated, i begged, and i was denied the right to consent. it was an unneeded major surgery that harmed me, physically and psychologically, that i will never recover from.

but why would they do this, you must be asking? i must be omitting detail that makes it make sense, you are probably thinking. already thinking like a doctor, shaped by those beliefs. they MUST have been trying to help me in some way with that surgery, right? i must be lying about it, right?

my great crime there is that i was comfortable being disabled. i was at peace with loss of limb, a limb that was already failing me, already useless. i was prepared to be physically, seriously disabled, and they could not comprehend that, could not accept that. in the eyes of a doctor, losing a limb makes someone broken; disability is the enemy, and it must be fought at all cost, the patient must be FIXED at all costs, even if they don't want it. and doctors will go to extreme lengths to make that happen, patient be damned. that's a doctor's idea of compassion: patients must be fixed, even if it harms them.

to me, and most disabled folks i've ever spoken to, doctors are basically like cops; a dangerous threatening force of harm, but that you have to perform correct behavior and respect around in order to stay safe. but where cops are legally blessed to kidnap and murder you, doctors are legally blessed to kidnap and torture you, to invade and change your body in the most intimate ways, and they will tell you, themselves, and each other that they do it for your own good.

so, have i bruised your ego? are you feeling attacked, defensive, accused of being in a cohort of monsters, certain that you could never be like that, that you're one of the good ones? you're already in med school, you're already someone with the qualities to self select for it and the privilege and abledness to make it in, you already have that baggage to try and counter if you want to empathise with your patients. how much pressure has there been from your family and peers to do it, how much praise have you gotten, how much has that fed your ego, your sense of being better than others? better able to help others? better qualified to know what's best for others? i hope that you do genuinely have compassion, and empathy, and belief in patients' autonomy in you, and it's not just hollow words you tell yourself are values.

i hope you have that compassion, and can act on that belief in autonomy. because it's not just about a prostheses one can take off and throw away. if you make it through the grinder and become a doctor, one day you will be faced with a patient that says "i would rather be permanently broken in a way that you find unacceptable, than put up with the treatment you want me to have", and you will believe, with your full heart and mind and vast knowledge of medicine, you will KNOW in yourself that they are wrong.

are you willing to accept that YOU are wrong, and they are actually right? are you willing to deem them worthy of autonomy? or will you prep them for surgery to fix them, as they are begging you not to?

[ireallyloveangst]

RECKLESS| Yuuta Okkotsu x Reader AU

Note: Since I don't see any Yuuta fics, I'll make one huhu let us appreciate our baby girl Yuuta! This fic is inspired by the song Reckless by Madison Beer! Listen to the song while reading this if you want to cry :')

Reader: gender neutral

Genre: ANGST! (cuz i love angst)

Synopsis: You two were both happy in your relationship, then why he suddenly changed after she's back?

Words: 678

Written: 08/13/23

•••••••••••••••••••••

"I love you"

That's the words he keeps telling me every second, every minute, every hour, and I love hearing it from him. The way he tells me those words never fails to give me butterflies in my stomach. He assures me that he only loves me. But what just happened to him right now?

Friends. They're just friends with that girl named Rika, he told me so. Rika, his childhood friend who moved out of town to continue her study abroad. When she came back, why everything changed?

I remember him telling me about Rika. Listening to him talking about her is something. You could see it in his eyes the way he talks about her. It seems like they're not just childhood friends.

Rika Rika Rika. Those words never left his mouth and it makes me sick.

_________________________________________

Hearing the news that Rika came back, Yuuta changed. He always left me out just to go to her house. Guess he just wants to catch up with her old friend?

Days turn into a week, weeks turn into a month. Still the same routine, leaving me just to be with Rika.

Am I a hotel to be checked in and out? I can't remember when is the last time he told me that he love me. It's always "Don't worry about her".

_________________________________________

My friends saw them both hanging out always but I insist because I trust Yuuta with all my heart. Hell, we both didn't hang out for a month.

It's been almost 2 months. Almost 2 months of crying in my room thinking why it should be like this.

After my friends told me they saw them both kissing in the park, of course, I wouldn't believe them until they sent me a picture for proof. That's when my heart shattered like glass. I couldn't stand this anymore.

_________________________________________

Just when Yuuta went home to our shared apartment, he saw me on the couch as I'm waiting for him.

"You're early" I told him without making eye contact. "Shouldn't you be with Rika at this hour?".

"She's meeting with her friend. And can't I get home early?" Yuuta said as he take off his shoes.

"Home? I thought she is your home?" I said and I feel Yuuta flinched from my words. There is a moment of silence and you didn't give him time to reply. "I guess my friends were right".

"W-what are you talking about? I already told you we're just friends! Stop overreacting Y/N." he shouted.

I laughed at his words without knowing tears already formed in my eyes. "Friends? Friends don't kiss Yuuta! Just— am I not enough?!" I shouted, already meeting his eyes and I feel my cheeks getting wet.

He didn't say anything as he was shocked and maybe still thinking what to reply.

"Each day goes by and each night I cry, somebody saw you with her last night" I whispered as I cannot use my voice properly from crying. "You said you love me and will never hurt me".

"Y/N, I do love you and I will never hurt you—"

"But here we are, you already hurt me" I cut off his words. "I should have known that you still love her," I said as I cover my face with my hands. I hate myself for crying because my tears will not stop flowing. "You swore to only love me 'till the end" I cannot handle this anymore.

He walks closer to me "Y/N, please–" I smack away his hands before he can hold me.

"How- how could you be so reckless?!" I close my eyes shutter as I can't bring myself to look at him. "How could you be so reckless with someone's heart?".

"I'm... I'm so sorry, Y/N" He stands up. "Know that I do still love you... It's just— things aren't the same" he said before leaving the apartment.

As I heard the door shut, I couldn't bring myself but cried my heart out. I guess I should cope with the pain, huh?

_________________________________________

Note: sorry if there's a wrong grammar :') English is not my first language.

[dangermousie]

You can tell Susu is hardcore gone for TTJ because she is genuinely jealous of Bingchang. Earlier, when she was emotionally not involved, she clearly got that TTJ was only interested in Bingchang because he was imitating Xiao Lin but now she’s involved emotionally, she is not clear headed at all.

Their terrible fight is, ironically, another proof of her feelings. Because if she was not involved, she’d just lie and say whatever to maintain her precious nails, but she can’t, she doesn’t even think about it, all she thinks is her disappointment and heartbreak. 

I really do love this scene so much because I think it’s entirely in character for both of them and shows that they would have a horrible time getting to a happy ending even without Bingchang or Tantai Minglang and his corpse army. Because their particular issues just are designed to hit the other in the worst way. Whenever he does anything that looks in the least suspicious or not perfect, the reason she jumps to the worst conclusions is because she starts seeing in him the monster who set the world on fire and killed her father and sect in front of her eyes, and then almost killed her. It is easy for us, the viewers, to look at poor meow meow Tantai Jin and go “but don’t you see he’s OK, woman, he’s just an abuse victim and xianxia non-neurotypical.” But she SAW him murder everyone in sight, she saw it with her own eyes. The fact that she’s been able to look past that and see him as his own person and not yet that devil, and even further to fall in love with him is huge but this trauma, this knowledge is always in the back of her head and that is why I cut her immense amounts of slack whenever she jumps to the worst possible conclusions. I mean, here she literally starts seeing the devil god as she looks at him. She has her own horrible trauma, even if it’s different from TTJ’s.

But the reason this is such a terrible combination is that her issues hit his square dead center. Because his greatest fear AND his default expectation is that he is a monster, he is unloveable, nobody can truly love him if they know him, nobody can choose him over a $2 bill let alone the world, nobody will believe him or trust him or take his side. And so the moment she flinches, the moment she distrusts, he does not jump to tell her the truth about that awful night (where he was fully justified in what he did and more merciful than 98% of people would have been) but instead revels in showing her “yes, I am a monster, I am the worst, I am everything you fear and loathe, of course you can’t love me” because he wants to shove away before he gets shoved away first, he does not expect anyone to believe him if he tells the truth and if he shows his vulnerability, he will not get consolation but another stab in the back. Basically, both of them need him to be perfect and perfectly good - she needs him to be so and he needs her to believe him so, for that to be a workable relationship, but it cannot be such. Even paragon Xiao Lin is not perfect, let alone how could Tantai Jin be?

If she just asked him “but why” or said “I know you must have had a reason,” the train would not derail. But for once, I genuinely get why the heroine always jumps to conclusions. And so he, hurt but her lack of trust decides to show her he is as bad as she fears, even worse. In a way, it’s like an animal who tries to make itself as fearsome as it can to drive away predators. Only the predator here is emotional and what he is trying to protect is his heart. Their different traumatic experiences make them incompatible.

Oooof! You know, I normally would wonder why she doesn’t learn since this is not the first time she jumped to conclusions wrongly. But she is so damaged by seeing the devil god rampage in the future, by believing it’s inevitable (she tries to change but she never believes she can, not really), that she walks into the same mess over and over and it is actually realistic.

He so hopes she will say yes. He does not expect it, but he really wishes.

That is what he thinks of himself, isn’t it? Because it’s been drummed into him his whole life.

Susu needs to learn the future is not immutable. She is here actually because she believes that - to change the future. But that also means people’s characters in the future are not immutable either! She needs to take that next step.

He does jump on that, he really is smart.

Oh, Susu!

He says that because at this moment he’s so hurt he wishes it were true but alas his heart is pretty damn human by now and the opposite is true.

Their problem is not some other chick or crazy half brother raising a zombie army or even tragic destiroy of TTJ. Their problem is that they love each other immensely and trust each other zero.

[yujo-nishimura]

Whispers of the Desert Kingdom - Part 3

Warning: Sir Crocodile x fem reader, English is not my native language, not proof-read, age gap

Comment: I get a feeling that the princess starts to turn into a Boa Hancock kind of Character for Croco.. Sorry for the slow development of the story, but I am committed to write daily and I want to enjoy the process as well. ;)

words: 560

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9

Pell returned with a tray brimming with food, and you hastily took your seat at the desk. Your heart continued to thump in your chest, and your cheeks still carried a blush. This marked the first time he had ever directly acknowledged your presence. Or did he? Perhaps it was all just your imagination.

"Here is your breakfast, princess. If you don't mind, I'll join you here, but I'll remain silent so as not to disrupt your studies," Pell said.

Unable to contain your curiosity any longer, you posed the question directly to him, "Why is Sir Crocodile here, Pell?"

Pell stammered, visibly surprised by your sudden inquiry. His eyes followed yours, fixated on the window, and comprehension washed over him. With a sigh, he placed the tray in front of you on the desk and settled onto a small chair beside you. This chair was typically reserved for your weekday tutor. A ray of sunshine illuminated Pell's face as he warmly smiled and resumed speaking.

"The king hasn't revealed the reason to me, but he did mention that he had an urgent matter to discuss with Sir Crocodile, requiring a private conversation beforehand. Additionally, it seems the king has taken notice of your... affection for Crocodile. Perhaps that's why he opted to meet with him privately."

You nodded, still uncertain about the exact purpose of Crocodile's visit, but grateful that Pell took the time to explain without further deception. Your cheeks tinged with a blush once more as he acknowledged his awareness of your love for Crocodile. You hadn't realized it had been so obvious.

You knew that the king's orders were unwavering, leaving you with no option than to obey. However, a deep yearning welled within you, the desire to sneak out of your room just for a moment and catch a glimpse of Crocodile. These opportunities were so exceedingly rare and the thought of him being so close to you now almost drove you crazy.  “I know what you are thinking, Princess. But I am so sorry, I cannot allow you to leave this room.” 

"I understand, Pell," you replied with a nod, your thoughts already racing. As you began to chew on a piece of bread from the tray, your mind worked tirelessly, searching for a way to devise an escape plan from your confined quarters.

As the hours slipped away, unnoticed, it was already noon, and you had managed to go through two books in an attempt to maintain the appearance of diligent studying. However, your true focus was far from your academic materials. Your thoughts were consumed by Crocodile and the purpose of his meeting with your father. The conflict between your obedience to the king's orders and your yearning to catch a glimpse of the man who occupied your dreams tore at your heart.

Beside you, Pell had sat in silence for a while now. It became clear that he had dozed off, his deep breaths indicating his sound slumber. Seizing the moment, you carefully rose from your seat, gently pushing the chair back to the desk. With watchful, silent steps, you made your way to the door and opened it.

"Forgive me, dear Pell," you whispered apologetically before slipping out of the room. Your footsteps were light and deliberate as you discreetly navigated the hallways, guiding yourself toward the king's banquet hall.