#it's one of the best feelings that i've ever felt but holy shit i hate trying to hype myself up to start sometimes

[visibun]

Me before exercising: "Mmmmm do I actually need to do this. I mean it's getting pretty late and I feel a bit sleepy"

Me at That One Point™ of my kickboxing where I suddenly hit and maintain my equivalent of a runner's high and start blowing straight through the rest of the routines/exercises like I wasn't almost asleep ~20 minutes ago:

"I'll kick anyone's ass. I'll kick your ass. I'll kick your dog's ass. I'll kick my own ass"

[gummydummy19]

Not now (male reader version)

Summary: You and Natasha are major enemies with benefits. You can hardly be in the same room together, let alone an elevator...

Content Warnings: smut (blowjob), angst, fluffy ending (you know me), LANGUAGE!

A/N: This fic is one of my favorites out of everything i've ever written, so I decided to make a male reader version :)) hope you like it! feedback is always welcomed

Word Count: 3.4K+

It had been a long, exhausting day. You weren't even supposed to go on any more missions until next week, but Fury decided to wreck your Friday and send you on your hardest mission yet. Your body ached and you just wanted to crawl into your bed as soon as possible. So when you saw Nat approaching the elevator, you silently prayed the doors would close before she got in. You just couldn't deal with her right now. Not now.

Of course, luck wasn't on your side today. Natasha slipped her slender body in between the doors just as they were about to close, joining you in the space that suddenly felt too small.

She smirked widely when you noticeably rolled your eyes.

"In a hurry?" she asked.

"Just tired." You dryly stated.

"Yeah, I can tell. You look like shit" She teased.

To be quite honest, you were fairly sure Nat hated you way more than you actually hated her, but you weren't about to let her know that.

You and Natasha started this whole enemies-with-benefits thing a while ago, and somewhere along the way, you started finding it harder and harder to keep up the hating game.

Sometimes you just wanted someone to talk to, to watch a movie with, to hold you after you'd a long day like this.

Admittedly, hating each other's guts resulted in some mind-blowing sex. Nat might be an arrogant bitch most of the time, but she was still the best fuck you've ever had, and you didn't wanna throw that away just because you were getting a little needy. So you decided to just suck it up and stick with what you did best, annoying her until she let you fuck her stupid.

And it had been working out just fine, but today you were so exhausted and she looked so good in her big comfy sweater and her tight black yoga pants. She had been growing out her hair lately and it was currently tied up in a messy bun.

You could barely look her in the eye, desperately trying to come up with a snarky response, but your brain failed you as the only thing you could think of was how good it would feel her nails rake through your hair right now.

She frowned, clearly confused and quite frankly annoyed at your lack of attitude.

She let out an annoyed huff and in one quick movement, her hand hit the emergency button, making the elevator halt.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" You snapped

"ME? What the hell is wrong with YOU? Did I fuck you stupid last time? What's going on?" She yelled.

Natasha had noticed the change in your behavior lately, and she didn't like it. Not one bit.

Her words made a blush creep up your neck and you silently cursed your body for betraying you.

You knew Nat thrived off your attitude. You were the only one who ever questioned her authority, it kept her on her toes.

She took a step closer to you and you immediately took a step back, not knowing if you could do this much longer.

Desperately trying to match her stern energy, you snapped back at her.

"Why the fuck do you even care?? Talk about being fucking cock drunk, Romanoff."

"That's what you'd like, huh, big boy? To get me cock drunk on that big dick of yours?" Natasha inched closer to you as you tried your best to ignore how hard you were getting from her voice alone.

"In your dreams, you fucking bitch" You turned around and hit the button again, making the elevator restart.

You felt her boobs push against your back and all you could do was stare at your shoes and pray to whatever was good and holy that this stupid elevator would just hurry the fuck up already.

Soft hands with perfectly manicured nails crept up the sides of your arms, while her plush lips left teasing kisses on your clothed back. The body heat radiating off her made it hard to think straight.

Gathering all your willpower, you softly shoved your elbow against her side, shaky arm pushing against her torso, trying to get her to move.

"Get off me, Natasha." Your tone almost had her believing you actually didn't want this.

Almost.

"Not until you tell me who shoved a stick up your ass." her voice was soft and teasing, tingling against the shell of your ear as she stood on her tippy toes.

She stopped the elevator for a second time.

"Natasha, I'm serious, cut it out!" You groaned, before pushing the button again.

"So am I?" she continued and her hand moved towards the button yet again.

"Would you stop?! You're acting like a child!" you yelled, trying to get the upper hand as the small metal cage rumbled.

The poor emergency stop must have been hit damn near a dozen times as you and Nat continued your pointless bickering.

Suddenly, the entire elevator shook and came to an abrupt stop, making her cling to your side for balance.

The lights flickered out and the buzzing noise that usually lingered around was gone.

You pushed Natasha off you and desperately tried hitting a couple buttons.

Nothing.

"Look what you fucking did!" you screamed at her.

"Me?" she yelled.

If looks could kill, Natasha Romanoff would be dead on the floor of that elevator right now.

A thick, deafening silence settled in between the two of you, and you let out a breath you didn't know you had been holding. Dropping your gaze to the floor, you let your shoulders hang, rubbing your hands over your face in exhaustion.

You turned around, staring at the buttons.

Fed up and extremely done with this stupid situation, tears started welling in your eyes. Fuck.

The emergency lights had gone on. You checked your phone. Of course there was no reception and it was late already, everyone else had gone to bed on their own floor and there was no way they'd hear you all the way from here.

"Perfect. Just perfect." You muttered.

Fresh out of fucks to give, you finally let the numb feeling you had been trying to push away all day take over your body. You slid down the wall, sitting with your knees drawn up and your fingers tangled in your hair as Nat just stood there and watched.

"Should have taken the fucking stairs," she mumbled.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath.

You were utterly exhausted, every muscle in your body ached. All you wanted was a hot shower and some sleep, and now you were trapped in this stupid elevator and you had to look at Natasha's stupid cranky face all night. Any other day you would have given her her crap right back, but not today. Not now.

Simply lacking the energy to be your usual witty and confident self, you let out an annoyed sigh.

"I'm so fucking tired." You finally muttered. If it wasn't for the deafening silence surrounding you, she probably wouldn't even have heard it.

Making eye contact with her was impossible at this point. And even if you had it in you to look her in the eye right now, the thick tears that started welling blurred your sight.

"Oh great, now he's fucking crying." Nat groaned, more to herself than to you.

You rolled your teary eyes at her typical arrogance. But when she took an awkward step closer, you pointed your finger at her.

"Don't even think about coming near me right now, Romanoff." You warned.

She smirked at the remark, finally catching a glimpse of the snarky man she was secretly so crazy about.

To your surprise, she moved closer and sat down beside you.

You glared down at her.

"You don't have to prete-"

"Oh, shut up." she cut you off as she cuddled closer to your side, dropping her head on your arm.

The smell of her hair brought you a weird sense of peace, which you welcomed nonetheless. There was something about her, about being this close to her. You couldn't put your finger on it, but it melted away your anxiety like snow in the sun.

A comfortable silence settled in between the two of you as you sniffled quietly, wiping away a couple of stray tears that had escaped your eyes.

She sat back up to look at you. You felt her eyes burning against your face but you couldn't bring yourself to return her stare. In all honestly, this was probably the most embarrassing moment of your life.

Clearing your throat, you pulled away from her.

"Alright, thanks," you said, before scooting a few inches to the other side.

As much as you hated to acknowledge it, being away from her even a few inches filled you with a slight cold, empty feeling. And you had to go against every fiber in your body not to scoot closer and ask her to snuggle up against you again.

"You don't always need to be such a tough guy," she spoke, making you scoff

"Oh, that's rich, coming from you."

To your surprise, she didn't say anything after that. She just cuddled closer to you again, clinging to your arm and she nuzzled her face comfortably against your shoulder.

A weird sense of comfort took over your body. That urge you had to be held and taken care of bubbled up again and you let Natasha fill that void. You knew it wasn't real. She didn't want to be here. But she was. And you were going to enjoy her warmth for as long as you could.

The intoxicating smell of his perfume and her body wash mixed with her natural sweet scent invaded your nostrils and made a heat run through you, warming you from the inside out.

You must have dosed off after that, because the next thing you know you felt your body being shoved aside, abruptly waking you from your slumber.

"Finally you guys got here! Her was starting to drool on my shirt." Natasha's arrogant voice spoke to Sam and Bucky, who had apparently found you in the elevator.

You knew it was too good to last. At least now you could go to your room and get some rest. Alone.

You slowly sat up, blinking the sleep from your eyes as you gaped at the three men in front of you. The smell of Nat was still heavy on you. Before any of them could say anything you scrambled out of the elevator. Running through the hallway to your room, wanting nothing more than for this day to just be over with already.

"Hey, wait!" Nat's voice sounded through the hallway as you looked for your keys, rolling your eyes.

"Oh for fucks sake, does she ever take a break?" you mumbled to yourself.

"Looking for these?" she asked, dangling your keys in front of you with a smug look on her face.

You groaned, reaching for the keys only to have them pulled away at the last second. It was quiet between the two of you for a beat, before you lunged for the keys again, failing miserably.

Okay. now you were pissed.

Natasha looked at you with a shit-eating grin.

"Come on, pretty boy." she teased, "come and get them"

Okay. Now you were pissed.

There was no way in hell you were faster than her. You knew it. She knew it. She just wanted to see you try. See you emberrass yourself even further.

And you actually debated it. For a split second, you debated it.

Nope.

Not today, Romanoff.

You were done. Done with this day. Done with these games. Done with her.

You scraped together every ounce of dignity you had left and turned around, walking away from her.

You got halfway through the hall before you heard her chuckle.

"And where are you going now, huh?" she questioned, obviously very amused.

"To sleep in Wanda's room." you simply said, not even bothering to turn around. You didn't need to see her face to know the grin had fallen.

"The hell you are." you heard her say, suddenly way closer to you as you heard her footsteps approach.

Before you could even comprehend what was happening Natasha yanked your arm back and walked you back down the hallway.

“What the-…HEY STOP” you tried to wriggle your arm out of her grasp but your already exhausted body just wouldn’t work with you. And perhaps your needy brain didn’t mind being held by Natasha...

Before you knew it you were being pushed into a room as she slammed the door behind her. You quickly realized you had entered a bedroom, but it wasn’t yours…oh no this was Natasha's room. You could recognize it from the scent alone…

She walked over to the bed and sat down at the foot of it, looking you straight in the eyes.

You stared at her from across the room, arms crossed, trying your best to appear stern despite the fact that the entire room smelled of her and it was making you want to crawl up in a ball on the floor, like a cat waiting to be cuddled.

"come here," she said, voice calm yet commanding.

"Bite me "

"I said come here."

"And I said bite me."

"If you come here then maybe I will."

You rolled your eyes but did as she said.

"Now what?" You asked in the most pissed-off voice you could muster.

Natasha saw right passed your macho behavior, knowing exactly what you needed from her. She grabbed your wrist and pulled you down onto her bed next to her before getting on your lap and wrapping her arms around your neck

"Now you let me make you feel good, sweetheart." her warm breath caressed the shell of your ear, making the hair at the back of your neck stand up as goosebumps started to spread all the way down to your spine.

She slowly pulled off her sweater and you groaned when you realized she wasn't wearing anything underneath, immediately sitting up to suck on her nipples.

A groan tumbled over your lips when her nails raked through your hair, gently scratching your scalp. Your hands touched every inch of flesh they could find, trailing up and down over her back, making her whimper.

Thoroughly enjoying each other's embrace, her impatient fingers moved down your torso and tugged at your shirt. Your lips curled into a smile against her to let her know he got the message. Within the blink of an eye, your shirt was gone and her lips were back on yours, devouring you as if you were her very last meal.

Your hands played with her tits as she started pressing kisses against your neck and down to your chest, pushing you back down on the bed.

"Stay down for me, handsome," she whispered in that low, sultry voice of hers.

She peppered your entire chest with soft, warm kisses, not leaving an inch of your body untouched. You laid back comfortably in her fluffy pillows and you felt your entire body relax. You enjoyed the view of her crawling down your body and unbuckling your belt. Natasha's plump lips moved down to your stomach and started kissing along the trail of hair growing down to your pubic bone as she pulled down your pants and boxers, revealing your growing cock. Her nails trailed over your skin sporadically, leaving goosebumps wherever they touched. Just as you noticed you had begun to smile to yourself, you got pulled from the cloud you were happily floating on by a sharp pain on your hip.

"AH!! Did you just bite me?!"

"'I'm a lady of my word."

Before you could scramble away from her, she licked a ferm stripe up your cock, all the way from your balls to your tip. You let out a low groan that quickly turned into a steam of moans as Natasha started bobbing her head up and down. She wasted no time, hollowing out her cheeks and swirling his soft tongue over your leaking cockhead, absolutely devouring you with all she had.

One of her hands reached down to play with your balls. Gently squeezing the soft flesh blindly while her eyes stayed focused on yours. She moved her hand to yours, guiding it to her head and throwing a wink at you. Your fingers quickly tangled in her hair as you pushed her down a little to take your cock deeper.

"Oh fucckkk...." you moaned, feeling your balls draw up as you got closer and closet to your peak.

Natasha kept sucking you off like her life depended on it as she moved her free hand down between her legs to play with her sopping pussy, messily rubbing her clit she started moaning on your cock. God she loved the taste of you, she simply couldn't get enough, it was making drip.

Both of your moans got louder and your hips started bucking up in her throat. Every square inch of your body was on fire.

Nat took her mouth off you for a second and stroked your spit-covered dick as fast as she could.

"Please, cum for me...m'so close..." she whined, making you realize she's been touching herself while sucking your cock.

"shit....please...gonna cum..." you moaned desperately

"Yeah? Cum down my throat while I cum on my fingers....shit..." she whined before taking you back in her mouth, immediately letting your cock slide deep down her throat as she choked on it.

"Fuck Nat I'm gonna cum!" you yelled, "You're gonna make me cum! You're gonna...I'm gonna...Oh fuck..fuck, please! Don't fucking stop...ah!"

And she didn't, she kept sucking your cock as she touched herself, and when her body started trembling from her own orgasm you finally couldn't take it anymore.

You came down her throat while she came all over her own fingers. You trembled and whined as she gently suckled on your cock, swallowing every last drop of your cum.

You tried to blink away your tears until they finally rolled down your cheeks, you tried to calm down your breathing as you layed there, trembling on her bed.

"What do you need, baby?" Natasha finally spoke, sitting up between your legs and softly stroking your thighs.

It took a while for your breathing to calm down, you didn't even know why you were crying to be honest. You just felt like you were experiencing a lot of emotions at once, and it was pretty intense.

"A fucking hug." you finally spoke.

Nat giggled at your reply before scooting over to sit next to you, leaning against the headboard.

"Come here."

Slowly, you crawled into her open arms, curling up against her into a ball with your head right against her bare tits.

Surprisingly, Natasha was very soft and sweet, not at all what she was usually like with you.

She rubbed your back and just laid there with you, enjoying each other's warmth and the comfortable silence that had settled in the room.

You couldn't help but let out more tears, softly sniffling into her chest as you clung to her.

"shhh" he whispered comfortingly, pressing a few kisses to the top of your head. "It's okay, l'm here. And you did so so good."

For the next few minutes, Natasha just held you, until you were ready to talk to him about what exactly it was that got you so overwhelmed.

After some time, you sat up and just looked at Nat. At her eyes, her nose, her mouth.

You leaned in and pressed a soft kiss against her lips.

"Thanks," you said.

"For letting you cum down my throat?" she joked, trying to get rid of some of the tension.

"For the care," you replied, meaning what you said.

She just smiled at you.

You didn't even know what to say. Never in your life have you expected Natasha to be so caring, especially not for you.

"Wanna shower together?" she suggested, leaving you even more stunned.

"Okay, who are you and what have you done with Natasha Romanoff?"

At first, she giggled at your reaction, but then her face grew a little more serious.

"I wanna be here for you for more than just fucking. The whole cat and mouse game was fun while it lasted, but seeing you the way I saw you today, so exhausted you could barely stand up straight. I never wanna see you like that again, baby. Unless of course, it's my doing." she added smugly before pressing another kiss to your lips.

"There she is again." you chuckled against her lips.

After some more kisses and giggles, you decided to accept Nat's offer and you took a long hot shower together, followed by some much-deserved cuddles and a movie you never saw the end of because you drifted off, with Natasha happily snuggled against your chest.

[ginger-berrie]

SO I JUST SAW FALSETTOS LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME

HOLY SHIT OKAY. HEY GUYS I JUST GOT BACK FROM SEEING FALSETTOS. LIVE. MY FAVOROITE MUSICAL EVER. I HAVE WORDS TO SAY.

So firstly I of course have to say this musical is fucking phenomenal and if u havent seen it even on youtube you HAVE to. onne of the best musicals ever wrutten. ignore any typos in this my hands r still shaking and im not editing htis. OKAY.

The actors. It was a college level production but the actors were so so talented. My favorite performances were from Mendel and Jason, who both pulled off their roles INCREDIBLY. Mendel was like a carbon copy of Brandon Uranowitz he had his mannerisms DOWN. All the nervous ticks, touching his face, being generally so awkward all the time, even his face was just perfec t for the role. And Jason was played by an adult femme-presenting person but they were so good as him!!!!! their voice fit him perfectly and she also perfectly encompassed Jason;s awkward childlike nature. The entire cast was incredible but those two really stood out to me!!!! Everyone's singing voices as well were fantastic, especially Trina's—she KILLED the high notes and even sung up the octave on a few lines !!!! including the "but still the bastard divorced me" and she still belted the "you must exorcise a devil" even AFTER Im Breaking Down. In fucking sane.

THAT BEING SAID THOUGH. Even though i enjouyed every second of it I do wanna make some more analysis-related directing critiques because im fucked up and evil about this show . im so sorry just let me speak here meaout. Stating right now though I've only seen the 2016 revival (about 2 dozen times) and not the original 90's version (been meaning to watch it just havent gotten the chance) so i reserve all TRUE judgement until after I see it!!! maybe some of these choices were in the original but tbh if they were i still like how the revival did it better. okay i swear im not just one of those ppl who is like "tHaTS noT hOw ThEY dId iT On BroADwAy" calm down. thanks <3

First of all. Some of the scenes lacked energy !!!!! Thrill of first love had no homoerotic choreography!!!!! they just kinda sat there on the couch looking morose and barely looking at each other as if they truly just hate each other and feel ANYthing towards each other anymore at all. But thats not the point!!!!!! They dont fully hate each other theyre just lacking the excitement that they once had and it's been replaced with nothing but disagreements and sex. When Whizzer and Marvin do their gay little dance theyre not just dancing and being gross and sexual theyre also FIGHTING!!!! they still care about each other they just dont know how to act!!!! and marvin's a bitch of course. Marvin was still very much a bitch. But because of the lack of energy in this song there was a bit of a lack of chemistry between the two as well, which carried through the whole show. I feel like it's important to see just how gross fucked up n nasty these two are about each other to see how its truly affecting the other people in Marvin's life. Even their chemistry during the chess game was lacking. They just kinda felt like they really hated each other. Which isnt the pointtttttt. Guh

Trina (or the directors idk) also made some choices I wasn't 100% on board with but they were more subtle. Mostly in her tone about Mendel. Up through Please Come To Our House she seemed to really really like Mendel. Like it was clear she was attempting to woo him. But then when he was proposing, and when they were maknig their home together, she just seemed. Unenthused. I know Trina truly doesn't really love her life, and just needs the stability of a nuclear family, but it was odd to see her not even attempt to keep up the facade on her own. Her and Mendel were similarly lacking in a lot of chemistry because of this, which, maybe to some of you makes sense but to me i do want to see them be close even if Mendel isn't absolutely the best.

LAST CRITIQUE OKAY. This one is BIG SPOILERS if u havent seen it yet but probably if ur reading this far youve already seen it okay. The fuckign bar mitzvah!!!!! There was no acknowledgement from Whizzer to Jason as he was reading his Torah !!!!!!! He just layed there in the hospital bed, facing AWAY from the audience so we could only see the very top of his head (which was on purpose for a quick change but) and he didnt get up at all to thank Jason or even acknowledge him :( for all the audience knows maybe he didnt even see Jason get bar mitzvahd. screaming crying throwing up.

OKAY IM DONE W BEING MEAN HERES A BIG CHANGE I REALLY LOVED !!!!!! as well as some smaller changes that i also really liked or were jsut neutral things i noticed

For most of act 2, up until Days Like This, They had this really cool circus imagery? Now once again idk if this is in the OG, but they had a picture of each cluster of characters set up on either side of the stage, and each of them was doing some sort of circus act both in the pictures and on stage, especially during A Day in Falsettoland. When a character was having their point in the song, they'd sometimes cut the lights briefly and suddenly the characters would be struggling to perform their little circus act, and each of them had a differnt one respectively and they all represented their immaturities/flaws/struggles:

Jason was on stilts, representing his need to grow up and perhaps his perceived mental maturity compared to the other characters

Trina was balancing/spinning plates on sticks, representing her need to keep balance and order in her life

Marvin + Whizzer were fencers because of their lingering animosity, yet newfound respect, for one another. Fencing isnt a dangerous sport, like you dont actually hurt your opponent in it, but it;s still a fight and youre still pointoing a weapon at them. guh. (AND BTW they did this during the racquetball scene and HOLY SHIT. I just gotta describe this one. Racquetball number 1 They had their little racquets as they were singing to each other but then when they got really into the game the lights would cut and then theyd be FENCING each other instead!!!!! and then the lights would cut again and itd go back to racquetball!!!! BUT THEN in the racquetball number 2 when it cut to them fencing ONLY MARVIN HAD A SWORD. WHIZZER STILL HAD HIS RACQUET. GIUUHUHGGHGHGHGHGH.;..,.,/;;'.';.;'[[[.)

Then the lesbians from next door were like a duo balancing/acrobatics act where they were always leaning on each other and picking each other up which was cute but also like. Charlotte would start falling in one direction and Cordelia would have to scrambke to catch her. I always hail them as the healthiest couple in the show but sometimes i forget they have problems too, like Cordelia;s insecurity and Charlotte's stress over the virus of course.

And finally Mendel!!!! was the fucking ringmaster!!!!! He had a hoop and a top hat and every time he was trying to calm down Jason (Everyone Hates His Parents), or Caroline, or Trina (A Day in Falsettoland), he would appear with his hoop and top hat, to show that HE is the one who needs to "control" other people's lives, or at least he feels the need to direct them. Mendel of course needs to feel like he's smarter than everyone else and like he's the only one who can help people. It really drove that home and it was an insane realization to come to. Phenomenal directing choice idk who came up with that but. bravissimo to you

Now miscellaneous stuff i liked or noticed!!!

They didn't have the big ol foam block. just some couch ends that they moved around to be diff pieces of furniture. If you've ever seen Waiting In The Wings' analysis on falsettos you might have seen a comment in the youtube section discussing how in the set design for the revival, the lack of real furniture through most of the show represents the lack of maturity of the characters, and as things get serious for them, more real props and set pieces get added. Like the chess board, the decor for Mendel + Trina's home, Whizzer's suitcase, the whole hospital room, etc. They didn't lean into that with this but i think that's fine! its not a necessary detail in my opinion and they did their best with what they had!!

Marvin didn't hand whizzer the suitcase after the chess game. He just grabbed it, and packed it himself. I was waiting for him to slam it into whizzer's chest or something. but no. Whizzer just picked it up and walked off. okay. Neutral bad change imo

Marvin's performances of What would I do and What more can i Say were. Breathtaking. Marvin actor if you're out there reading this your voice is lovely and carries so much emotion in your solo numbers. I Did Cry. a little bit

god their group number harmonies were AMAZING. All of the cast members' voices blended together so well and it was absolutely beautiful. the whole show was beautiful and i adored it i swear. I jsut need somwhere to put my feelings

THE ORCHESTRA FUCKED. IT FUCKED

Okay its getting late now and im fading quickly BUT IF U READ THIS FAR UR INSANE. This is for me and nobody else i just eneded to feelings dump. tl;dr: i fucking lvoe falsettos this was one of the best nights of my life i love you actors i love you pit i love you lighting i love you run crew i love you sound crew i love you musical theatre

[bteezxyewriter12]

Desire/ 2

Pairing- Seonghwa x Named Reader

Word count- 2.6k

Includes- Sex, cock riding, missionary, marking, multiple orgasms, sort of fluff

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxxmine @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@yeosxxx @seokwoosmole @jjongsbebe @wisejudgedragonhairdo @meowmeowminnie @woo-stars @borntowalkaway @usagionthered @san-realblkwife @seonghwasstar @jejeyeppeo @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @prayerofthehaim @realisticnotes @pinkies-things @insomniacatiny @stephy-nicole13 @hotteokhatyu

Gif Credit- hwanswerland

Masterlists- check out for more fics

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J POV

I hate the way the room is filled with tension

Tension that never used to be there between me and Seonghwa

He came over to hang out, watch the new Guardians of the Galaxy movie that came out

But the second he came in my apartment, it's been awkward

I know it's because we fucked

And the way we woke up

In each other's arms, holding each other tightly

We separated once we were fully awake and it's been awkward since then

He was radio silent for a week until I texted him that my friend downloaded the new Guardians movie we've been waiting for

He came over, we got snacks then went to my room where my TV is

His body is so tense as he sits next to me, watching the movie

I can't concentrate on it

I just keep thinking about him

He's the only thing I've thought about this past week

I don't know what it is but when we were together, I felt something

Like a spark of some feelings

And it's the stupidest thing I could ever do

He's a fucking idol

He has no time to date

That's why I don't see him much and why all Wooyoung wanted was to fuck

And that's a whole factor in itself

I fucked Wooyoung, one of his members and friend

Talk about being a skank

Not to mention Seonghwa's completely gorgeous, so outta my league

So is Wooyoung but I never felt anything for him like I do for Seonghwa

I knew with Wooyoung, I was fuckable, not datable

The same applies to Seonghwa

He's around so many beautiful girls all the time, there's no way I can compare

I just wish everything was back to normal

I hope this doesn't ruin our friendship

He's my best friend since we were little

I need him

---------------------------

The next two hours are stress inducing for me and I haven't paid attention to the movie at all

I just keep glancing at Seonghwa, then fall into staring at him, remembering how good he felt

How he looked under me

How beautiful his face was in pleasure

How surprisingly good it felt when he came inside me

That was one of the biggest shocks

His dick is so thick, so massive that I felt him throb inside me when he orgasmed and it felt amazing

And I realize, I want him again

"Jo?", he calls, snapping me out of my thoughts

I look over at him, surprised to see anxiety and nervousness on his face

"Yeah? You ok Hwa?"

"Yeah I uh...wanted to ask...", he trails off

"Uh yeah. Ask", I answer, watching him, all my previous thoughts about being with him coming back

Fuck, I want him

"Can...uh...can...Can you-"

"Sit on your cock?", I blurt, then am horrified at what I said

Holy shit, what the fuck is wrong with me?

Oh my god

"Never-", I start

"Yes", he answers at the same time

"Yes?", I ask, shocked

He nods, lust in his eyes, "Please sit on my cock. God, fuck, I crave to be inside you again"

I nod, immediately reaching for his pants

Our bottom clothes quickly fly off, his hands on my hips, pulling me on his lap

I wrap my arms around his neck, his arm around my body, his hand leading his cock to my hole

I sit on his head, his hands sliding to my hips, pushing me down on him

I let out a huge moan as I feel him slide inside, his big cock splitting me apart, touching all the right places

I lean my forehead against his as he bottoms out, his tip nestled against my spot

"Hwa fuck", I whimper, grinding on him, wiggling on his cock to open me up more

"Jo, oh god", he moans, his hands moving to my ass, groping hard

"How do you have the perfect cock Hwa?"

He fits inside me perfectly, filling me to the brim with no room to spare

The fucking full feeling of his cock inside me is astounding and so satisfying, I never felt anything like this

"Mm it's not me jagi. You have the perfect pussy"

"Mmm I don't think either of us is going to win this argument", I say, rocking on his thick cock, clenching him tightly

"Fff...fuck", he groans, "So fucking tight. How are you so tight?"

"How are you so big?", I murmur

His hands help me rock back and forth on him, his head rubbing my spot

"I don't know but I'm just for you", he moans

"I'm just for you Hwa", I agree, feeling the pleasure run through every nerve in me

"So fucking good", he murmurs, "So good"

"Can I fuck you Hwannie?", I ask, desperate to bounce on him

I just want to feel his big cock drag through me, wanna feel him split me open over and over

Wanna cum all over him

"Yes jagi, please", he whines

Thank god

Sliding my hands up his body, I wrap my arms around his neck, starting to bounce on him

"Oh fuck", I cry, bottoming him out over and over, his head smashing my spot with each bounce

His hands slide up my body, pulling my shirt up

"Need you naked", he moans, "Need to touch you"

Moving my arms, he peels my shirt off, then I take his off too

I need to feel his skin against mine

His fingers unhook my bra, throwing it somewhere in the room

Moving my arms around his body, I put my hands on his back, feeling his muscles

God, he's so fucking hot it's insane

His hands squeeze my ass, kneading it as I slide up and down his cock

I'm so fucking wet, drenching his shaft, making it so easy to fuck him

Our moans of pleasure fill my room, his sounds so fucking pretty, turning me on so much

And I realize I'm the reason he's sounding like this

I'm the reason he's in pleasure

It's fucking amazing

His fingers so very slowly trail along my back, making each piece of skin he touches shiver

"Fuck baby", he murmurs, "Your skin is so soft. So smooth. So beautiful"

"Hwannie", I moan, loving the compliment

Sliding my hands up his muscular arms, I squeeze his biceps, his strength so sexy

I lean my forehead against his, my arms wrapping around his strong neck, my fingers in his silky hair

I love his hair

The half ponytail, the long strands I can pull, it's styled off his forehead, how soft it is, silky, the strands falling through my fingers so easily

How good it is for gripping and pulling

His arms wrap around my waist, holding on as I ride him hard

"Hwannie", I moan, my eyes closed, his lips so close to mine, they're almost touching

"Baby", he whispers, his breathing labored

I'm so close, his perfect cock entering me over and over so fucking blissfully

"Let me cum on your cock", I whimper, moving my hips faster, "Please Hwannie"

"Yeah jagi. Please baby", he whimpers, "Wanna feel you cum so bad"

My fingers grip his hair hard as I bounce on him, our foreheads pressed together, his mouth breathing so close to mine

"Feels so good Hwa", I murmur

"So good", he agrees, his fingers digging into my ass cheeks, helping me bounce on his cock

I slide down his cock, intense pleasure washing over me, as I cum around his cock

"Seonghwa...ahhh...Hwa", I moan, shaking in his arms, pulling his hair

God, it's so fucking amazing, so intense, his cock so fucking hard inside me, so fucking pleasurable to clench around

I never felt anything like this before

Only with him

"Oh god", he groans, our moans so close to each other's lips

"Hwannie", I sigh, as my orgasm tapers off

I open my eyes to find him already looking at me

His brown eyes are so intense, his hand reaching up, gently tucking hair behind my ear

Before I know it, he leans in, closing the small gap between us, his lips crashing into mine

Electricity bursts in my body, the entire world tilting, my head so dizzy

Just from his kiss

I melt into him, kissing him back with just as much passion

His tongue licks my lips and I open my mouth for his tongue to slide in

As soon as his tongue touches mine, I let out the loudest moan, my tongue playing with his

Fuck me, he is a damn good kisser

His kisses are like heaven and I just want to spend the rest of my life kissing him

How is his kiss this amazing?

This intense?

Making me feel all these things for him?

Or....bringing out all the feelings I had but didn't know about

Either way, I'm so fucking glad he kissed me

He turns us over, getting me on my back, his mouth never pulling away from mine

He kisses me wildly as his cock slides back inside my cunt and I involuntarily clench down on him

"Mmm", he moans, laying gently down on top of me

I move my arms around his body, pressing my palms to his back, just getting lost in his kiss

He doesn't move, just stays buried inside me as we continue to kiss

I had no idea my dorky Star Wars Lego loving best friend could kiss like this

And the crazy part?

I never want him to stop

His arm wraps around me, pulling me against his perfect body, his mouth moving against mine

Slowly, he pulls his hips back, his cock dragging blissfully through my pussy on his way out

Then he surges back in, bottoming out in one stroke and I moan in his mouth

His hips keep moving, moving slow but hard, going so deep I can feel him in my stomach

It feels amazing

His lips break from mine as he thrusts his cock into my cunt, instead pressing kisses to my neck

"Hwa", I whimper, his lips kissing in the sensitive spot on my neck, chills running up my spine

"Jo", he murmurs sweetly, his hand moving around my boob, squeezing gently

Fuck, he's doing everything to make sure I'm in intense pleasure

His mouth sucks softly on my neck, feeling so good, his tongue licking the spot after he lets go

"Is...is there a mark?", I whimper

"No jagi", he answers, kissing another spot

"Leave them", I ask

God, I want his marks on me

"Mmm jagi, if I start I'm not going to be able to stop. I'm going to leave so many on you"

"I want them Hwannie", I beg, "Please"

"Anything you want baby", he answers, his mouth latching on to the same spot he was sucking on before

The pleasure intensifies, my body arches into his body on its own

His arm wraps around my waist, holding me against him

I'm in fucking ecstacy

His body against mine, his cock fucking me deeply, his hand playing with my nipple and his beautiful lips sucking on every piece of skin he can

I honestly can't wait to see all his marks in the mirror

He spreads his hickies down my collarbone on to my boob, sucking desperately, his hips moving faster, cock burying into me over and over, my pussy spasming uncontrollably around him

He moans into my skin as he lifts his lips off me

Finally his mouth wraps around my nipple and he sucks hard like he can't get enough

"Seonghwa!", I yell, gripping his hair hard, my other hand around his upper arm, my nails digging into his bicep

I feel my pussy get so much more wet, soaking his dick as I clench on him

"Fuck fuck fuck", he groans, switching to my other nipple, sucking desperately

The continuous rhythm of his head hitting my spot is driving me crazy, pushing me to the edge

"Seonghwa...I...I'm... Seonghwa", I call

He lifts his head, his lips crash into mine, kissing me deeply as he sends me head first into an intense orgasm

Massive pleasure plows into me as I cum and I moan into his kiss as chills run up and down my back, my body trembling against his

I swallow his moans as our tongues playing with each other, kissing hard

He fucks me through my orgasm, his hips not stopping as he rolls them in to me

Once the last feeling of my orgasm leaves me, he pulls away, smiling softly at me

I can't help but smile back, his smile making me feel warm inside

He kisses me gently, his hand cupping my cheek

God, it's such a fucking mind blowing kiss

After, he sits up, moving my legs around him better, his hands holding my thighs

He pulls out then quickly slides back inside, my spot pleasured again

"Fuck", I cry

This time his hips move fast, plowing me into the bed, our moans so loud

I can hear how wet I am, the sound of my pussy taking his cock actually very erotic

"Such a good pussy", he growls, his fingers tightening on my thigh

"Good cock", I whimper, "The best"

He smirks before he looks down, the sight so sexy

God, my best friend is a sex god

He pounds into me and the sight of him fucking me is so goddamn hot

His face in pleasure, his eyes stuck on his cock plunging inside me, the veins popping on his arms from how hard he's holding onto me

His entire body has a sheen of sweat, making his abs and chest muscles more defined, the muscles flexing as he moves

His black hair is soaked, drops of it falling onto my skin

He's so fucking beautiful

And I feel my heart stir as I watch him, the overwhelming want for him to be mine, just mine, hitting me so hard

Which is ridiculous

He's my best friend, one who has shown no interest in me in that way

And all the reasons as to why he'd never want me hit my mind as I watch him

It's just sex, I tell myself

I need to stop thinking about this right now

Now is not the time

I can worry about what I'm feeling later when I'm alone

Clearing my mind, I keep my eyes on him, watching all the small facial features he does that shows how much bliss he's in

His hips slam into me faster, plunging his cock so deep in, hitting my spot and making me shake in pleasure

I'm so close

"I'm gonna cum", he moans, his cock indeed throbbing inside me, "Can I cum in your pussy?"

I nod, pleasure filling all my senses as I get right to the edge

"Yes Hwannie"

He fucks into me a few more times, his cock sending me right into my orgasm, ecstacy taking over

"Seonghwa", I moan

"I'm coming. Fuck Jo, I'm- fuck!", he yells, the pleasure evident in his voice

His cock buries inside me, his hands squeezing the life from my skin, his head tilted back, eyes closed as he yells my name

Fucking gorgeous

His cock throbs inside me, warm sticky cum filling me right up, just how I like it

I love feeling full of him

Last time was so good and now its even better

His eyes open as his head tilts down to look at me, awe in his eyes

Awe about what I don't know

He pulls out, his eyes moving down, biting his lip as his cum leaks out of me

I love that feeling too, dripping all over my thighs, making a mess

He closes my legs after a minute, laying down next to me

I turn to face him, his gorgeous face already turned to mine, his gaze already on me

His hand moves into my hair, softly running them through the strands

I don't know how strong this feeling in my chest is

All I know is that I am feeling something for him

And right now, I just want his lips against mine

"Kiss me Hwa"

He smiles softly, coming closer to me immediately, his lips right against mine

And I fall into him

[sumiez]

so.. hear me out.. you know how kurt says he’s “all about love” on his stream? how about reader is almost as unhinged as he is, showing up to every stream and viewing every video. they understand and worship the lesson. now that he’s all about love reader is too and tries to get him to love them back

- n.e

paparazzi | kurt kunkle

warnings: typical spree stuff, obsessions, hit and runs, makeout sessions

a/n: first kurt request.. i hope i did him justice!! love the idea btw i love when readers are just as cuckoo as him

to call yourself obsessed with kurtsworld96 is a grave understatement. you weren't sure exactly how you discovered such an obscure influencer, it was likely youtube's algorithm being generous, but it was one of the best things to ever happen to you.

every video of his would receive a like from you. every stream would result in you two chatting about anything and everything before it inevitably ends with his mom calling him down for dinner. but that was the extent of your relationship—a fan and content creator.

you're enamoured with the idea of becoming his number one fan, his ride or die, his most loyal follower. every time he greets you on stream your heart soars.

once he began the lesson, however, you became determined to meet him. a real, genuine meeting, and you were going to win him over for good. you worship the lesson, it's not staged prank content like his friend bobby, it's real. it's gritty. and, in your opinion, incredibly attractive.

who cares about the people you left behind to travel all the way to outside LA. kurt is all that matters in your lovesick state.

opening the gogo app, you frantically search for kurt's description. according to his stream, he should be searching for unlucky victims right about now, despite spree being suspended.

you're about to grow frustrated until you see your saviour's profile appear. you couldn't possibly be happier.

immediately requesting a ride, you fish out your handcrafted, shoddily made kurtsworld hat and drop it onto the top of your head. you cannot wait to see the look on his face when he catches you adorning it.

after a few minutes of listening to him ramble to the camera about how he's surprised no passengers have recognized him, you hear him announce that he thinks he has his eyes on the prize—you.

you enter the stolen vehicle with a skip in your step, except this time you find comfort in the passenger seat.

"whoa whoa w—hey, wait, is that a..?" he stammers out, initially apprehensive at your choice of seating but you see him ease up once he notices your headwear.

"yes, kurt, i'm literally your biggest fan," you answer breathlessly, showing off your hat to the camera. "i loved watching you kill all those jerks, but now that you're all about love it's even better, you know? i've been watch—"

you're interrupted by kurt laughing out of pure glee. he's never felt this loved before. "holy shit you guys, we actually ... we have a real fan in the house," he trips over his own words out of unfiltered excitement. he made it. fuck his other tens of thousands of viewers, this person, this angel, is all that matters.

the two of you spend what feels like an eternity chatting, just like old times.

"what's your favourite video i've made?" he asks, and if your vision isn't deceiving you, he's blushing. hard.

"gotta be your horror movie reviews. i liked you before the lesson too. but your water bottle tutorial was really useful too, i know a few people who really need to drink one." you reply instantly, as if you planned out the whole conversation.

in truth, you did rehearse your answers to certain questions, you're infatuated with your plan to impress kurt and win him over. some may call you unhinged, but you're the kind of person who'd do anything for love.

the chat isn't too fond of your friendly behaviour with each other. they're begging for something gory to happen, and honestly, a death at kurt's hand isn't something you'd hate that much.

he listens for their pleas to start driving and places his hands on the wheel. "you want to go to the...construction site, right...?" he asks with a raised brow.

"yeah! i loved the gummy bear part of the stream, i'd love to check the place out myself." a smile graces his features in response to your words. he's still shocked that someone actually likes his content enough to spend time with him.

as you drive down the bumpy road, he pipes up. "so, like, what's your handle? i'll follow you back,"

"we've been mutuals for years, kurt."

"wait, you're—" he repeats your username, the one person other than bobby who continuously tunes into his content. "damn. that's so cool. it was always...neat seeing you pop in,"

you perk up as your face grows warm, "you really think so? it means a lot."

"of... of course i think so. i couldn't have done it without... well, you..."

as he steers, you embrace the boldness kurt gives you and you peck him on the cheek. the skin is flushed beneath your lips, and he nearly crashes at the contact.

"i... oh god, you just.. i really... i really want to.."

"look! some dumbass is crossing the street! hit them, hit them!" you jump out of your seat and point towards a middle aged man, and kurt speeds up.

he's so flustered that he's still registering the kiss, but he complies, hitting the pedestrian with a bone—chilling thump.

his viewers are growing every second, the chat congratulating him for getting some action, while others toss insults at the life you two just ended.

"our first kill," you say as you two lock eyes and he has the giddiest grin on his face.

finally reaching your destination, he opens the driver side door and does a loop around the car to open yours. such a gentleman.

with his clammy hand in yours, you step out.

"sooo, this is the spot where i ran that douchebag over," he points around the area, shuffling his feet. "i can... show you the junkyard with the dogs too, if you want."

you nod enthusiastically, "i'd love to see that."

"great, great. uhh.." as he thinks of what to say next, you approach him. draping your arms around his neck, you press a kiss to his chapped lips. he can't help but groan at your touch, never having kissed anybody like this before.

he instinctively pulls you off.

"i... that was..."

"nice?"

"yeah. nice. do you wanna take this to my...back to my car, or something?" nodding again at his words, you reach for his hand again and stroll to the vehicle with him.

you crawl inside and kurt immediately gets comfortable on top of you, shoving his face into yours. you can tell he's inexperienced when it comes to kissing, but you return the touches, fingers finding refuge in his tufts of hair. his kisses are sloppy but passionate, his longing to be loved presenting itself in each action.

"i've always wanted to..." he mutters as he pulls away for air. "...kiss someone like that. i'm glad it was a fan and not some jerk at one of bobby's parties,"

your heart hammers in your chest as you respond with another breathless kiss. you're actually kissing your idol, and his entire stream is watching. kinda forgot about that.

without warning, a police car skids into the lot, and you and kurt exchange glances of horror.

he rushes to the driver's seat, yelling at you to put on a seatbelt as he preps for blastoff.

he peels out of the area, driving to god knows where.

"well, my little... partner in crime... do you wanna finish what we started somewhere else?"

"of course."

[thatgayb1tchwhosimps4her]

Request: Can I request Quinn Bailey x Reader, where reader persuades Quinn to go to the halloween party with the rest of the gang, with as much tooth-rotting fluff as possible.

Of course you can, I am so glad someone requested Quinn Bailey x Reader, I'm absolutely obsessed over this.

*****

New Romantics

Quinn Bailey x Female Reader

Word Count: 732.

*****

You had been stood at the side of the dance floor, watching the alcoholic beverage swirl around in the bottom of your red cup for the past 30 minutes, with your friends previously going off to do their own thing, had left you contemplating how much longer you should wait for your date to arrive.

The pop music blaring into your ears, had drowned out all other sense you had on what choice to make. That was until you felt someone tap on your back, which made you jump, before turning around to see your girlfriend standing in front of you.

"Holy shit, don't scare me like that." You said to her, putting your hand on your chest.

"Sorry," Quinn exclaimed, "I forgot to text you saying I'd be a bit late, my shift ran longer then I thought it would, and it put my whole getting ready ragime back by like 20 minutes." She added.

"It's okay," You replied, "For a moment, I thought you'd stood me up. I was just contemplating if I should leave or not."

"Me, stand up the most gorgeous girl I've ever set my eyes on? Never." The red head declared.

"Oh sure, yeah whatever you say." You laughed off, "Besides the point but, what are you supposed to be? I mean you do realise this is a costume party, plus you know Mindy and Tara will drag you home if they see you in something that looks nothing like a costume."

"I'm a vampire, duh." She said, spinning around to show off her cape, red and black striped stockings and black dress, before lifting her upper lip to reveal costume vampire fangs.

"Ah, got it. Bet you can't guess what I am." You stated.

The red head looked you up and down trying to assess your costume, before your t shirt caught her eye.

" 'Eat my brains' ," she read, "Ohhhhhh, your a zombie. See I thought the blood and the holes in your t shirt and trousers were what you usually wear." Quinn retorted.

"Haha, very funny." You replied, sarcastically.

"Well if it makes you feel any better about me being late, I think I know the perfect way to make it up to you." The girl stated.

"Oh yeah, what might that be." You questioned, tilting your head to the side.

"This." Quinn declared, intertwining her fingers into the belt loops on your jeans, before pulling you closer to her by them and kissing you deeply.

"I think you've infected me with your zombie virus." Quinn chirped, after you both broke the kiss.

"You're such a nerd." You chuckled.

Just before you both were about to kiss again, you heard somebody shout from across the dance floor.

"Ew, get a room! Jesus Christ, no one wants to see you guys exchange bodily fluids." Ethan shouted, as he and the rest of the gang were walking over to the two of you.

"Oh please, just because you're the only single person in our group doesn't mean you can hate on me for kissing my girlfriend." Quinn stated, putting her arm around your waist.

"Hey, come on guys, we're here to have fun. Let's not get into arguments just yet." Sam said.

"I'll drink to that." Chad declared, taking a swig of his bear.

"I second that" Tara agreed, before taking a sip of the red liquid that was in her cup.

"Frankly, I'll drink to anything, so hell yeah" Mindy quipped, finishing off the bottle of tequila in her hand.

"Okay, enough of hypothetical drinking. Let's get on the dance floor, get our best moves out and do some actual drinking." You stated.

"Now that I'll agree too," Anika said, "Plus I heard that the DJ is playing songs from '1989' very very soon, so I can't miss that, not for any of you." She added, eyeing Mindy

"That is something we can all agree on, none of us are gonna miss out on basically any Taylor Swift song to ever exist." Sam replied.

"Then what are we waiting for," Quinn declared, "Let's go top up our drinks and start dancing." She added.

Let's just say, all of you were dancing to the sound of Taylor Swift for many hours after that, and you had to get taxi's home because of how sore everybody's feet were.

*****

Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it, let me know what other things you would like me to write, and yeah feel free to request for the characters on my pinned post.

See you in the next one.

-Harlow

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

A/N: I wrote this loosely based on my own experience where my feelings for someone was used a prank for April Fools. Except it was the guy I liked who pranked me, and there was no happy ending. Also, my best friend at the time was part of it. Still hurts to think about.

Kevin hated Steve Harrington and hated him with a passion. He never did anything to him personally, but he didn't do anything to stop his friend Tommy from shoving him into lockers. He swore that if he had ever been given the opportunity that he would get revenge. Tommy had gone off to God knows where Steve would have to do, especially since he's been hogging all of Eddie's time since Spring Break.

Kevin had heard all sorts of stories about how Steve saved his life and how he had been taking care of him. He knows what kind of guy Steve is, knows that he's probably yanking Eddie's chain. Guys, like Steve, they never really change. He was going to hurt him before he could hurt Eddie. He knows that even douchebags can have feelings, and they were clear as day when he looked at Eddie. No, Kevin couldn't allow that. Saturday was April 1st. What a perfect opportunity. It was also perfect that he could copy Eddie's handwriting almost exactly. He wrote the note and slipped it on Steve’s car at Family Video. He ran back to his car, where it was parked down the road.

"I'm telling you, Robin," Steve said as he walked out of work with his best friend. "Even if he does like guys, it doesn't necessarily mean he likes me."

"I've seen the way he looks at you!" Robin practically growled at him.

"I don't want to get my hopes up here," he replied.

"It's worth the risk to have a little hope," she said softly. "Hey, what's that on your car?"

Steve shrugged and picked up the white piece of paper. It was a note from Eddie. He smiled, the smile growing as he read the note.

"Holy shit, you were right, Robin!" Steve exclaimed. "He likes me. He really likes me!"

Robin squealed and made a grab for the note. She jumped and hugged Steve. The next thing Robin knew, Steve was spinning her around and dancing with her in the empty parking lot.

"It's all coming together, Robin," Steve said softly.

When Saturday rolled around, Steve waited around impatiently for the evening to come. Robin had come over to help him get ready, and she began to get nervous with him. It wasn't even her date. When it came time to meet Eddie at the restaurant, Steve dropped Robin and her bike off at her house with promises to call if the date went well. He walked into Enzo's, flowers gripped tightly in his hand, and sat at the table reserved for him. It was quite a fancy restaurant for Eddie, but then he remembered how he had mentioned before about really working really hard to save up for something special. Had he been talking about Steve? He wondered what he would be wearing. He hoped it would be his regular clothes. That would be a sight.

As he thought about Eddie, an hour went by, and then another. It was pretty close to closing time, and Eddie was still a no-show. Steve frowned into his glass of water. He knew that if he hadn't shown up by now, then he was never going to show. It felt like someone had punched him the gut. The waiter came over to him with a note, and he perked up. Maybe it was from Eddie explaining himself. He opened it, and he sucked air through his teeth. It no longer felt like a punch. It felt like someone had rammed a sword through his stomach. On the note, in Eddie's handwriting, were the words: April Fools. Fuck.

Steve stormed into his home, slamming the door so hard it rattled. He was finding it hard to breathe. He could feel his face flush with shame and humiliation. Of course, it wasn't real. Of course, it had been a joke. Of course, no one could ever really love him. His parents certainly didn't. Nancy didn't, and now. . .now, it was Eddie who didn't love him, who thought he was a joke. That one hurt most of all. Fool. Bullshit. Fool. Not good enough. Not smart enough. Not worth it. Steve screamed and began breaking the things in the foyer. The end table came crashing to the floor, and he pulled the mirror that hung with it, the vase on top breaking on the floor as the rest followed suite. The notes were still crumpled in his hands, and he let them fall to the floor as he walked over the broken glass.

"Hello?" Robin called out as she entered Steve’s house the next morning.

She tried calling first, knowing he liked that, but he didn't answer, and so she got worried. He had promised to call if the date had gone well. Robin frowned as she moved all the way in and felt the crunch underneath her feat before she saw it. She glanced down and saw the wreckage on the floor along with the note. April Fools. She gasped, running over the glass and up the stairs to Steve’s room. She burst through the door, and her heart broke at the sight. Her best friend was lying in bed, still in the clothes from last night. His eyes were glassy and swollen. He looked so tired, so sad. . .

"Robin," Steve croaked.

Robin spent the next week when she wasn't working or going to school, taking care of Steve. She called off sick for him and worked hard to be there for him. She prevented the kids from stopping by, claiming that she didn't want them to get sick, but she knew that wouldn't hold for long. Friday had been enough for her after seeing him in school all happy and smiling while her best friend laid up in bed. He went to the bathroom and he still ate food but he stopped bathing. He stopped caring about his hair! Enough was enough!

"MUNSON!" Robin yelled, seething, as she stormed into the drama room.

He was holding Hellfire, had just begun when Robin ran in, and he nearly toppled out of his chair. He had never seen her so angry before, and honestly, it was terrifying.

"Robin, what -," Eddie started.

"He can't get out of bed because of you because of this!" Robin exclaimed, slamming pieces of paper to his chest. "After everything he did for you! What the fuck?!"

"A-are we talking about Steve?" Eddie asked. "I thought he was sick."

"No, he's fucking not. He's fucking devastated because of what you did," she said in disgust.

Eddie frowned, and his eyes widened when he read the notes. Oh God, he felt like he was going to be sick.

"How long did he wait?" Eddie asked.

"Hours," she replied.

Shit.

"Robin, I didn't write this," Eddie said.

"Oh, likely story," she scoffed.

"I swear, but I know who did," he said darkly and looked Kevin's way when he heard him laugh.

Eddie stood up, letting the notes fall, and walked towards a laughing Kevin. He grabbed Kevin by the collar, pulled him up out of his chair, and slammed him roughly against the wall. Kevin stopped laughing.

"Seriously?" Kevin asked.

"What you did was beyond fucked and you did it in my name," Eddie said furiously.

"King Steve deserved what he got. He is and always will be a bully," Kevin sneered.

"Jesus Christ, Kevin!" Grant spoke up.

"Steve Harrington is a better man than you will be. He grew up. How about you do the fucking same? In the meantime, you're out of the club," Eddie said.

He grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and ripped it down the middle before slamming him back against the wall. Kevin glared at him, grabbed his things, and walked out. Eddie turned around, full of rage.

"Anyone else have a problem with Steve Harrington?! If you do, speak now!" He snapped, pausing. "Alright then, Hellfire is canceled for tonight. There's someone I need to tend to. I swear, Robin, I - "

"I believe you," she said quickly. "Let's go."

Eddie nearly broke down crying at sight of Steve laying in bed, looking so utterly defeated. Steve flinched away from when he tried to touch him. Eddie was going to curse Kevin's name until the day that he died.

"Steve, listen to me. I swear on Hellfire, Dustin's mother, and James Hetfield that I didn't write that note. That was all Kevin, and it was for something that Tommy did. I was going to ask you out to a Tears for Fears concert. I even bought the tickets, I've been waiting to ask you. I still want to ask you, but I understand if you don't believe me," Eddie said.

"I never stopped him," Steve said, looking at him.

"Stopped who?" Eddie asked.

"Tommy."

"Oh, baby, you weren't the only one who could have done something. Besides, it wasn't your job to stop him. The only one who well and truly could have stopped Tommy Hagen was Tommy Hagen. He made his choice, and he got to lay in whatever bed he made. You didn't deserve what happened to you, my love, nobody does," Eddie said.

"Am I?"

"What?"

"Your love?"

"Abso - fucking - lutely you are!"

Steve met him halfway to the sweetest kiss that either one of them had ever gotten. Eddie pulled back with a grin.

"There's no doubt about it," Eddie said. "I love you, baby, I do, but your breath stinks, and you need a shower."

Steve laughed, and it was the most beautiful song that Eddie had ever heard. His favorite song.

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

august 25, 2021 9:00 p.m. seoul

**TW: SUICIDE MENTION**

[grant] hey, not to bring up the previous conversation, but uh, i wanted to say i'm sorry you had to deal with me the same year you were going through so much. it wasn't fair.

[henry] it's okay, grant. i don't think your motivation for being an addict and attempting suicide that year was, "yeah, fuck henry, i want to make his life so much worse right now. his dad's dead, he may not have enough credits to get his degree this may, and now me!"

[grant] it doesn't matter what it was. the fact is that my problems hurt other people. i didn't just harm myself. and i was not a pleasant person that last year when you really needed pleasantry.

[henry] yeah, i'm not going to lie to you, that very last year of college, i thought the version of you i knew and loved was gone.

[grant] i was insufferable.

[henry] correct. you were an asshole.

[henry] for the most part. you did try to be good again and be there for me when my dad died.

[henry] it was weird. i hadn't seen you sober in years, but when i called you for the first time in a few weeks because there was no one else besides soobin i wanted to talk to about my dad dying, you showed up to my place kind of normal again.

[henry] i don't want to say "sober" because you probably weren't, but you were at least on fewer substances than i was used to at the time, so you seemed sober.

[henry] you weren't in a place to show up for people long-term because you were suffering, too, but you tried. you checked on me every day for a few weeks until finals hit and everything got crazy for everyone. well, no, until we threw that intervention for you right before finals. nonetheless, i appreciated the effort.

[henry] it stopped me from cutting you out, so there's that.

[henry] i'm not trying to sound rude either, please don't take it that way. it was just a lot. i would have regretted it if i cut you out, and i didn't want to at my core because i do not want to do life without you, but i didn't think you had it in you to get out of that spiral you were in for years. i really did not. i thought you were done for.

[henry] i'm sensitive, even if i never sound like it. i was mad at you for bad behavior, but i was also, um, really sad to see you like that. i love you. i've loved you as a brother and a best friend for almost my entire life. and i did not think i could stomach watching you die at your own hand. it made me sick.

[henry] and it probably makes me a bad friend to have felt that way. one, to have thought about cutting you out, and two, to have had so little faith left in you. you deserved more faith from me. if the roles were reversed, you'd never give up on me.

[grant] don't say that. everyone has their limit, and it's hard to know where it is until you finally hit it. i would have one, too.

[grant] and man, you were meant to feel that way. i meant it when i told you i pushed people away purposely.

[grant] whatever conscience and consciousness i had during that time always reminded me that i was terrified of hurting other people. i was very well aware i was probably causing, like, terrible amounts of pain to my friends and family, and i didn't want to do more damage when i killed myself, so...

[grant] yeah, i always meant to kill myself. i thought about it every day for years, honestly all the way back into high school, and i got super close to trying it about a billion times, but i only ever went through with any of my plans once.

[grant] and i'll regret for the rest of my life that you and my grandparents had to see what i did to myself on graduation night.

[grant] but anyway, i chose to have those awful behaviors because i felt like if i ran everybody off and made them leave, they'd be glad i was dead and wouldn't hate me for what i did and just forget me.

[grant] terrible, terrible strategy! like holy shit! i also entirely regret acting out like that, the much happier and stable version of myself from the last, like, eight years realizes that made everything worse and wouldn't have fixed anything anyway.

[grant] trying not to hurt people by hurting them upfront is a fucked up strategy. just entirely fucked up and counterintuitive.

[henry] no, it wouldn't have worked. you'd have left everyone traumatized by not being able to repair things with you.

[henry] so, whether you like it or not, people do like you. people tend to really, really like you. you have a very magnetic, charming personality that very few other people in the world share.

[henry] and people do want you around. i want you around.

[henry] i know what i just said, but i really do want you around.

[henry] but also, wow. i guess you did a great job at trying to run us off since it almost worked on me.

[grant] it was easier than acknowledging people care about me or worry about me. i'm not good at that.

[grant] oh, and in those rare early moments where i thought that i needed help, i was scared everyone would only ever see me as a fucked up shell of a human being. like if i got better, i would still be reduced to the guy with problems.

[grant] i'm glad that i regret trying to kill myself. there's a lot i would have missed out on, including the chance to be nice to myself. but i do worry that some of those things are true, that fucked up is the only way people see me, even strangers.

[grant] i feel like glass sometimes. like everyone looks through me and sees the worst in me and only the worst.

[henry] i'm sorry you feel that way.

[henry] it's a little ironic, though. the more you hold back from telling your loved ones these things or try to push us away so we never see you struggling with anything ever, the more we worry you have the same exact problems that almost killed you before.

[grant] i've really backed myself into a corner, eh?

[henry] there's about a million things i could respond to that with, but here's the most important one. you're worth worrying about.

[henry] you spend your life looking after people and telling everyone to care about others, like you just told me to worry about my future kids, but you seriously do not believe you deserve that in return, and i don't get it. no, i do, but i don't.

[henry] yes, your parents taught you that you don't deserve love, but then again...

[grant] i'm trying to believe. and i have gotten at least a little better. my birthday, you know? i handled that pretty well.

[henry] everyone has flaws. we could and should try harder to not emphasize yours so much. but i don't see those flaws first. and if i do think about them, it's because i don't want them to take you away.

[henry] you don't see my flaws first, do you? clearly, you don't. right? you don't act like you see them.

[henry] the person i see you as is the kid who became friends with me two decades ago. some random nice kid who approached the one new kid at the park sitting by himself and played with him even though they couldn't talk to each other yet. some random kid who learned the basics of my language on the internet to write me a sweet letter saying, "hi, i'm grant, i'm six years old, and i want to be your friend." it didn't even matter it was written poorly.

[henry] i see a lot of good things in you. remember, i was just telling everyone about how nice you were to help me save the first dinner i hosted for soobin. a day ago, you helped me get over failure, one of my lifelong biggest fears, for an hour or two.

[henry] but i think our beginning sums you up nicely. i don't know anyone else who would have gone to such lengths for some nobody new kid. you didn't owe me your time or your respect and yet you gave it to me. and that was a weird time in my life. everything turned upside down when i moved. to have a friend like you then was...

[henry] and of course, nothing's changed. you're still a kind person. you're funny. you're smart. you're just you. you're one of the only people on earth who isn't fake. the kid i remember isn't gone. i'm glad he survived. i'm glad i didn't lose him.

[grant] despite everything, it's still me?

[henry] yes. but so we're clear, you don't have to do nice things to be worthy of being liked. you're likable on your own. i'm only saying that your kindness stands out to me, and i know that you value that trait, so it bears mentioning. you've been very good to me. i can forgive the times when you weren't. i've been a jackass before, too. i've probably been a jackass to you.

[grant] i feel like we've said thanks a lot today but thanks for sticking with me. don't feel bad that you thought i couldn't get better. that was my fault. but you're still here. and you showed up on graduation night for me. i'm beyond sorry that you had to see any of that, like i cannot repent or apologize enough in my lifetime, but thank you.

[grant] i owe you my life.

[grant] i owe you a lot but that first.

[grant] i've said it before but it should be repeated, you know? i definitely would have died if you didn't come that night. aside from my uncle, you're the only one i know who can pick a lock.

[henry] just do not make me do it again. i would show up a second time, but it would be better on my psyche if that was unnecessary.

[grant] it won't happen again. i've been good for a long time, but i'm great now and most of all, appropriately medicated for bipolar disorder. it's all going to be okay.

[grant] we're going to go home, continue being best friends forever, you're going to be a great dad one day.

[henry] and you will get your job back!

[grant] great minds think alike! now, how much longer until the arcade? i promise i'll let you win a game of air hockey for once.

[webslingingslasher]

ETHAN AND PETER MADE OUT????

pls elaborate

was it a one time thing? drunk incident? late night talk incident? lets make sure we’re not gay incident?? pls we need a trouble reaction to this info!!! “ive been telling u petey, dont be afraid to be your true self! im sure aunt may will be so pleased when she hears this, shes been waiting a while!”

i think they were both drunk but had stopped drinking and were just hanging out in ethan's room so they're slowly sobering back up and it's reaching early morning and they've been having deep talks and someone had asked "would you ever hook up with a guy?"

and maybe cause ethan’s been kinda open to the fact he's just honest about it, 'im not sure, i've never even kissed a dude. have you?'

and peter hasn't, but he's also confidently straight.

'no. have you ever thought about it?'

and ethan shrugs and is like, 'kinda, i don't know if i'm into them or not. does that make me gay?'

peter doesn't think so, 'if you hook up with a guy and you don't like it then you have your answer for sure.'

'yeah, but what if i do like it?'

'then i start wingmanning you with other dudes, should be easy enough.'

and it warms ethan's heart to know peter doesn't give one shit.

'i haven't even kissed a guy, i'm not trying to jump right into banging. like, who tops? who finishes first?'

peter's got an idea. 'so, you want to know if you're even open to going something with a guy before you do something with a guy?'

ethan knows it's confusing. it is for him too.

'i guess. any suggestions?' he gave a dry laugh, like he knew peter would be just as optionless as he was.

they're best friends right? and kinda drunk so it could be excused down the road. and hey, it's not gay if you're helping out the homies, right?

peter clears his throat, "wanna kiss me?"

and holy shit does ethan leave his body. the idea that peter would even offer was mind blowing, let alone asking. it's not even like ethan's into peter, not in the slightest but that was his best fucking friend and he just offered to kiss him.

'what did you just say?'

'don't make me say it again, cause i won't.'

ethan's shaking his head like a dog, 'you want to kiss me?'

'you asked for a suggestion! i gave you one! if it sucks and you hate it, then, hey, we were some friends that got a little curious while drinking. if it does something to you then, hey, you got your answer.'

logically, peter makes a good point. something they'd never talk about again, and he was the safest person to do it with.

'what if it doesn't work cause i'm not attracted to you?'

'we're not testing if you're into me, we're testing to see if you could make out with a dude.'

ethan thinks it's a solid deal. 'fuck it, man. let's kiss.'

peter leans in slowly, ethan gradually closes the gap. peter's the one who made first contact, but it felt like ethan was kissing his grandmother, there was nothing to base off a longing peck.

so, ethan takes the initiative and opens his mouth. peter follows, it makes ethan realize peter's willing to go as far as ethan will. so, he ever so slightly suggests the idea of a makeout, dotting his tongue on peter's lower lip, and surprisingly, peter's open to it.

if ethan can separate the kiss from the person, it's pretty nice. he likes the feeling of a rough jaw, a solid chest, strong arms, the slight tickle from stubble. the whole rubbing tongues thing kinda freaked him out, but that's also because it's peter and he knows where, or who his tongue had been in.

peter's right. it helped him make up his mind, plus, he needs air.

the second ethan pulls away they both wipe the back of their hands across their mouth, speaking at the same time, 'no homo.'

'bro, kissing you feels like i'm rubbing my mouth across an eraser soaked in clorox.'

peter's glad he's figured it out, 'so we have the answer?'

ethan nods, 'i'm open to doing stuff with dudes, just not you.'

'whatever, you made out with me.'

------

and yes, i think one night, just to be a shithead, ethan tells trouble,

'did parker ever tell you about the time he kissed me?'

[heartfullofleeches]

Uwhwkwjwlbw I'm OBSESSED with Hayes bc holy shit?? Jekyll and Hyde inspired oc??? FUCK YEAH!! Can I make a little request where they just start turning into their version of Hyde while around Y/N?? Also hope ur doing well!

Hayes leaves their house earlier than usual. It's been a few days since that little incident in their lab. Their hands felt numb and every step made their body ache, but they have to leave their house before anyone grew worried. Especially you.

As painful as it might be in very sense of the word, Hayes would have to distance themself from you. They still weren't sure what was going on, but every time they shut their eyes they felt that obsessive side rearing its ugly head; begging to be in your audience. It wasn't like the little voice in the back of their head that told him to confess their love. It was a separate, conscious mind that screamed for its right to be the one to lay claim to your heart - and it was real. A sentient thought with its own goals and no filter on what it would do to reach them. There was not telling what could happen if they meet you in this state, but everything should be completely fine.

Sure, this separate side showed up whenever they thought of you, and their own feelings weren't too far off from its obsession, but as long as you didn't cross paths they could make it through the day just-

"Hayes?"

Fuck.

Hayes slowly turns to face you; worry clear as day on your face. They can already feel light headed as you close the distance between you.

"Oh, Y/n... H-hey.."

"Where have you been? I've been trying to contact you for days."

"I've been... around." The butterflies in their stomach feel like they're welded knives. Stopping being a good friend already so they can suffer in the sanctity of their home alone.

"Is everything okay? You're sweating up a storm... and what happened to your hands?" You grab their hand before they can even answer; bandages wrapped loosely around their wrists. They looked like world's worst mummy; completely inexperienced in taking proper care of themself.

Y/n...

Hayes' vision blurs; breathing sporadic. There was that voice again. The haunt of their waking mind. The cruel reminder that what they've experienced is harsh truth of reality. They start to lose the feeling in their hands - in themself. This was bad.

"U-um.. Y/n? Could you let me go?"

"Hang on a sec, these bandages are a mess. Let me fix them real quick."

Their face flushes as you lift the sleeve of their shirt, unhooking the pin around their wrist that kept their mangled bandages in place. Your perfect skin touches theirs as you rearrange the wraps. Every inch that falls under your touch flares up; an ache that could only be resolved by the lasting trace on contact. Your skin felt so soft. They wanted more, they needed more.

"Really... it's fine." Their voice trails off. They can feel themselves slipping. Everything about you was intoxicating. Your voice, your scent - your entire existence. They wanted to drown in it all.

"Ha... aha.."

"And.. done!.. Are you ok? You really aren't looking so good."

They can just barely process your words, but a smile still pulls across their face. Alright? Why wouldn't they be? They were in the presence of the one they adored. If anything, they were the best they'd ever felt. You pull your hand away from theirs, but they grab it in the last second.

"Hayes?.."

Ugh, how they hated that name. A coward's title; one unwilling to give you their all. Unlike them.

Forever devoted. Forever loyal. Existing only for the sake of you. That person grins as they hold your trembling hand to their face.

"Save the names for later, my love. I'm far better than okay, since I'm finally with you~"

[ineffable-snowman]

Fic Tag Game

Thanks for the tag @dark--whisperings!

How many works do you have on ao3?

fifteen

2. What's your Ao3 word count?

400,883 (holy shit)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

right now switching between Star Wars and Good Omens

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Maybe Someday - 841 kudos, most of them thanks to @plumbum-art's wonderful comic Date Night, which "resurrected" this little fic of mine.

and then my four MCU (sambucky) fics:

Trouble Man - 841 kudos, too!

Pet Psychopath - 712 kudos

Partners, Accidentally - 561 kudos

Co-Workers with Benefits - 509 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes. Because if I write a comment, I like to hear from the author. It doesn't have to be much but it just makes me happy to hear that my comment made the author happy. And I think interaction is important to keep a fandom "alive" (even if often I don't know what to say but I try).

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't write angsty endings. But I'm a little worried that people won't agree with me that Match Made on Earth has a happy ending.

7. What's the fic your write with the happiest ending?

As I said, they all have happy endings, but the ending of Four Chord Songs and Sentimental Lyrics is particularly sappy. I was wondering if that love song in the last chapter was *too much*, but then I thought: nope, it's Anakin, *too much* is his personality trait.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

This year I got two very rude anon comments on one of my Obikin fics accusing me of horrible things. The accusations felt pretty generic and did not fit to that particular story at all, but they still left me a little shaken. Fortunately, the people in the Obikin discord were really kind about it and helped to cheer me up.

Back on FFNET I received the occasional "ew, they're not gay, why would you write that?" Also there were some people who were angry at the way I wrote Obi-Wan, saying things like "how can you say he's your favourite character and then characterise him as weak/flawed/incompetent... and make so many bad things happen to him?"

BUT, all in all, fandom has been a positive experience and the many good interactions far outweigh the odd rude comment.

9. Do you write smut? What kind?

Does one awkward sex scene per multi chapter fic count? (No.)

10. Do you write cross-overs?

No.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so, not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a long time ago on FFNET when I still wrote Harry Potter fic.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes.

14. What's your all time favourite ship?

I feel like Obikin is the "correct" answer because I always come back to them.

15. What's your WIP you like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Step into Christmas with me. So far, I've managed to add two chapters every season. If I continue at that pace, I might finish it in two more years...

16. What are your writing strength?

Beginnings and endings.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The long middle parts that always become too long and repetitive.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Okay, I have Opinions on this!

I don't like it and don't see the merits of it. It often just feels like the author wants to show off their language skills. But as a reader it takes me out of a story. I don't want to check footnotes or use google translate in the middle of reading.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Just for myself: Harry Potter. Posting online: Star Wars.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Servants of the Force is definitely not my best writing but it's still my favourite fic anyway because I've never put so much effort into a fic before and I'm proud that I finished it.

---

I'm not sure who has already done it. tagging (no pressure!): @underacalicosky, @demonghost, @somethingsteff, @ineffableobikin, @fulcrum843, @howlbrooklyn, @kingdomvel

[keyofjetwolf]

Yellowjackets S01E06 spoilers under the cut NOT FOR PRYING HOLLIGAY EYES

"Jackie just adored rabbits."

OH MY FUCKING GOD AND AN AVALANCHE OF THOUGHTS JUST CRASHED DOWN ON ME AND I'M TAKING YOU ALL WITH ME

I'd filed away that Shauna has A THING about rabbits. We've seen her kill two, going so far as to expertly skin, disembowel, butcher, and then make a chili out of the thing to serve to her family. (Who loved it when they had no idea what was in it, hello I see you clear parallel.)

Yet we've ALSO seen that Shauna has bunny shit absolutely everywhere, all these tchotchkes that didn't seem to fit. Not only in what we're gathering about her general lifestyle, but in her apparent relationship to rabbits. She hates them! Murderously! But she also cherishes them? Or at least the still, silent representations of them that can't eat her garden.

Couldn't make sense of it, but it was too obviously placed as a contradiction to not make note of it, so note it I did and moved on.

UNTIL NOW AND HOLY SHIT

JACKIE IS THE RABBIT. I've been wondering what happened to her (as I have everyone we haven't also seen in the 2021 timeline), but I feel SUPER confident now saying she's dead dead so fucking dead.

Shauna loves her. They've been best friends for how long?

Shauna is IN love with her. That much was obvious immediately, and is I believe 10000% the reason she hooked up with and later married Jeff. (Can't have the girl? Have the guy who can.)

Shauna hates her. This part I'm shakiest on right now, but if Jackie is the rabbit (JACKIE IS ABSOLUTELY THE RABBIT), then I know it's true. Maybe Shauna hates her because Jackie can't/won't/doesn't return her feelings. Maybe Jackie's kind of selfish and terrible sometimes. Shauna was going to (or was at least wrestling with) passing up Brown to go to whatever shitbag local university Jackie was going to, and was that because Shauna wanted to, or was pressured to, or felt obligated to, or...?

I don't know that piece yet, but I DO know people are complex and can be many things at once, and so even without filling in the details, I have zero problem accepting that Shauna loved and hated Jackie all at the same time.

Bringing us to today. Shauna cherishes the idea of the rabbit, enshrines it almost, while Shauna also kills and eats the rabbit.

So if Jackie is the rabbit (AND JACKIE IS WITHOUT A DOUBT THE FUCKING RABBIT), oh that bitch became dinner and I'd lay two shiny quarters that Shauna is the one who took the first bite.

Because how else to love Jackie, to take her in so completely, than literally consume her?

THAT IS FUCKED MY FRIENDS

THAT IS FUCKED UP AND I'M INTO IT

#oh shit oh shit #and a couple episodes ago where jackie DIRECTLY SAYS she's not cut out for all this #this isn't her world #the others can adapt and do what it takes to survive #jackie can't #the poison ivy #that means something too #not getting it right now but that's also symbolic of something filing that away too #anyway yes jackie basically ANNOUNCES IT THERE that she's doomed #oh man and what did the head coach say about her being team leader aahhh #gotta rewatch brb #'when things get tough out there those girls are gonna need someone to guide them' #GUIDE #not lead #because jackie isn't a natural leader it's painful whenever she tries #the leader is clearly taissa #guide though #influencer as he also says #fuck me yeah it's all right there #a guide shows the way #girl you were dinner before you ever set foot on that plane #ANYWAY SORRY I'M HAVING A LOT OF THOUGHTS IN THIS CHILIS TONIGHT

Edited to add: "JACK RABBIT" IT'S ALL JUST SITTING RIGHT THERE FUCK YOU GOODBYE

[gummydummy19]

Not now

Summary: You and Steve are major enemies with benefits. You can hardly be in the same room together, let alone an elevator...

Content Warnings: smut, mean Steve, angst, fluffy ending (you know me), LANGUAGE!

A/N: This fic is one of my favorites out of everything i've ever written. Almost a year after losing my first blog, including most of my fics, I was able to recover it :)) I hope you enjoy

Word Count: 3.4K+

It had been a long, exhausting day. You weren't even supposed to go on any more missions until next week, but Fury decided to wreck your Friday and send you on your hardest mission yet. Your body ached and you just wanted to crawl into your bed as soon as possible. So when you saw Steve approaching the elevator, you silently prayed the doors would close before he got in. You just couldn't deal with him right now. Not now.

Of course, luck wasn't on your side today. Steve pushed his muscular arm in between the doors just as they were about to close, joining you in the space that suddenly felt too small.

He smirked widely when you noticeably rolled your eyes.

"In a hurry?" he asked.

"Just tired." You dryly stated.

"Yeah, I can tell. You look like shit" He teased.

To be quite honest, you were fairly sure Steve hated you way more than you actually hated him, but you weren't about to let him know that.

You and Steve started this whole enemies with benefits thing a while ago, and somewhere along the way, you starting finding it harder and harder to keep up the hating game.

Sometimes you just wanted someone to talk to, to watch a movie with, to hold you after you'd a long day like this.

Admittedly, hating each others guts resulted in some mind blowing sex. Steve might be an arrogant ass most of the time, but he was still the best you've ever had, and you didn't wanna throw that away just because you were getting a little needy. So you decided to just suck it up and stick with what you did best, annoying him until he fucked you stupid.

And it had been working out just fine, but today you were exhausted with an extra dose of PMS, and he looked so good in his white cotton shirt, he had been growing out his beard lately and his hair was a little messy.

You could barely look him in the eye, desperately trying to come up with a snarky response, but your brain failed you as the only thing you could think of was how good it would feel to be in his arms right now.

He frowned, clearly confused and quite frankly annoyed at your lack of sass.

A groan rumbled in his chest and in one quick movement, his fist hit the emergency button, making the elevator halt.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" You snapped

"ME? What the hell is wrong with YOU? Did I fuck you stupid last time? What's going on?" He yelled.

Steve had noticed the change in your behavior lately, and he didn't like it.

His words made a blush creep up your neck and you silently cursed your body for betraying you.

You knew Steve thrived off your attitude. You were the only one who ever questioned his authority, it kept him on his toes.

He took a step closer to you and you immediately took a step back, not knowing if you could do this much longer.

Desperately trying to match his stern energy you snapped back at him.

"Why the fuck do you even care?? Talk about being fucking pussy whipped, Rogers."

"That's what you'd like, huh? For me to fuck you again?" Steve inched closer to you as you tried your best to ignore how wet your panties got from his voice alone.

"In your dreams, asshole." You turned around and hit the button again, making the elevator restart.

You felt his heavy chest push against your back and all you could do was stare at your shoes and pray to whatever was good and holy that this stupid elevator would just hurry the fuck up already.

Strong hands crept up your sides, breath hot against the exposed skin of your neck. The body heat radiating off this man made it hard to think straight.

Gathering all your willpower, you softly shoved your elbow in his ribs, shaky arm pushing against his torso trying to get him to move.

"Get off me, Steve." Your tone almost had him believing you actually didn't want this.

Almost.

"Not until you tell me who shoved a stick up your ass." his voice was low and raspy, tingling against the shell of your ear.

He stopped the elevator for a second time.

"Steve, I'm serious, cut it out!" You groaned, before pushing the button again.

"So am I?" he continued and his hand moved towards the button yet again.

"Would you stop?! You're acting like a child!" you yelled, trying to get the upper hand as the small metal cage rumbled.

The poor emergency stop must have been hit damn near a dozen times as you and Steve continued your pointless bickering.

Suddenly, the entire elevator shook and came to an abrupt stop, making you cling to Steve's side for balance.

The lights flickered out and the buzzing noise that usually lingered around was gone.

You pushed Steve off you and desperately tried hitting a couple buttons.

Nothing.

"Look what you fucking did!" you screamed at him.

"Me?" he yelled.

If looks could kill, Steve Rogers would be dead on the floor of that elevator right now.

A thick, deafening silence settled in between the two of you, and you let out a breath you didn't know you had been holding. Dropping your gaze to the floor, you let your shoulders hang, rubbing your hands over your face in exhaustion.

You turned around, staring at the buttons.

Fed up and extremely done with this stupid situation, tears started welling in your eyes.

The emergency lights had gone on. You checked your phone. Of course there was no reception and it was late already, everyone else had gone to bed on their own floor and there was no way they'd hear you all the way from here.

"Perfect. Just perfect." You muttered.

Fresh out of fucks to give, you finally let the numb feeling you had been trying to push away all day take over your body. You slid down the wall, sitting with your knees drawn up and your fingers tangled in your hair as Steve just stood there and watched.

"should have taken the fucking stairs," he mumbled.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath.

You were utterly exhausted, your body ached. All you wanted was a hot shower and some sleep, and now you were trapped in this stupid elevator and you had to look at Steve's stupid cranky face all night. Any other day you would have given him his crap right back, but not today. Not now.

Simply lacking the energy to be your usual sassy and confident self, you let out a shaky sigh.

"I'm so fucking tired." You finally muttered. If it wasn't for the deafening silence surrounding you, he probably wouldn't even have heard it.

Making eye contact with him was impossible at this point. And even if you had it in you to look him in the eye right now, the thick tears that started welling blurred your sight.

"Oh great, now she's fucking crying." Steve groaned, more to himself than to you.

You rolled your teary eyes at his typical arrogance. But when he took an awkward step closer, you pointed your finger at him.

"Don't even think about coming near me right now, Rogers." You warned.

Steve smirked at the remark, finally catching a glimpse of the snarky woman he was secretly so crazy about.

To your surprise, he moved closer and sat down beside you, raising his arm to invite you in his embrace.

"Come here."

You glared up at him.

"You don't have to prete-" you yipped as Steve cut you off mid-sentence, yanking you against his chest and draping his arm around you.

He just held you as a few silent tears escaped your eyes. Finally relaxing in his embrace, you let his warmth surround you.

The steady sound of his heartbeat brought you a weird sense of peace, which you welcomed nonetheless. There was something about him, about being this close to him. You couldn't put your finger on it, but it melted away your anxiety like snow in the sun.

A comfortable silence settled in between the two of you as you sniffled quietly against his chest.

You felt his eyes burning against your face but you couldn't bring yourself to return his gaze. In all honestly, this was probably the most embarrassing moment of your life.

Clearing your throat, you pulled away from him and gave his chest a few awkward pats.

"Alright, thanks," you said, before scooting a few inches to the other side.

As much as you hated to acknowledge it, being away from him even a few inches filled you with a slight cold, empty feeling. And you had to go against every fiber in your body not to scoot closer and snuggle up against him again.

A shiver ran through your body as you forced yourself to stare at anything but Steve, when suddenly a soft, heavy, blanket-like piece of fabric was throw at your feet.

Steve's jacket.

You thought about telling him you didn't need it, but soon realized that would be pointless as he would probably argue with you until you took it anyway, so you picked up the jacket and wordlessly wrapped it around your shoulders.

The intoxicating smell of his cologne and his mints mixed with his natural warm musky scent invaded your nostrils and made a heat run through you, warming you from the inside out.

A weird sense of comfort took over your body. The urge you had to be held and taken care of bubbled up again and you let Steve fill that void. You knew it wasn't real. He didn't want to be here. But he was. And you were going to enjoy his warmth for as long as you could.

You must have dosed off because next thing you know you felt your body being shoved aside, abruptly waking you from your slumber.

Finally you guys got here! She was starting to drool on my shirt." Steve's arrogant voice spoke to Sam and Bucky, who has apparently found you in the elevator.

You knew it was too good to last. At least now you could go to your room and get some rest. Alone.

You slowly sat up, blinking the sleep from your eyes as you gaped at the three men in front of you. The smell of Steve was still heavy on you. Before any of the men could say anything you threw the jacket of you and scrambled out of the elevator. Running through the hallway to your room, wanting nothing more then for this day to just be over with already.

"hey hey hey, wait!" Steve's voice boomed through the hallway as you looked for your keys, rolling your eyes.

"Oh for fucks sake, does he ever take a break?" you mumbled to yourself.

"Looking for these?" he asked, dangling your keys in front of you with a smug look on his face.

You groaned, reaching for the keys only to have them pulled away at the last second. It was quiet between the two of you for a beat, before you lunged for the keys again, failing miserably.

Okay. now you were pissed.

Steve looked at you with a shit eating grin, raising his arm straight above his head. Okay. now you were pissed.

Steve looked at you with a shit eating grin, raising his arm straight above his head.

"Come on, Princess." he teased, "come and get them"

There was no way in hell you could reach that far up. You knew it. He knew it. He just wanted to see you try. See you jump for him like a little kid trying to get the stuffy at the fair.

And you actually debated it. For a split second, you debated it.

Nope.

Not today, Rogers.

You were done. Done with this day. Done with these games. Done with him.

You scraped together every ounce of dignity you had left and turned on your heals, walking away from him.

You got halfway through the hall before you heard him chuckle.

"And where are you going now, huh?" he questioned, obviously very amused.

"To sleep in Bucky's room." you simply said, not even bothering to turn around. You didn't need to see his face to know the grin had fallen.

"The hell you are." you heard him mumble, suddenly way closer to you as you heard his heavy footsteps approach.

Before you could even comprehend what was happening Steve had you tossed over his shoulder.

“What the-…PUT ME DOWN” you tried to wriggle your way out of his grasp but your already exhausted body just wouldn’t work with you. And perhaps your needy brain didn’t mind being wrapped in Steve’s arms…even if you were dangling upside down.

You heard a door slam behind you and realised you had entered a bedroom, but it wasn’t yours…oh no this was Steve’s room. You could recognise it from the scent alone…

He put you down the second the door fell shut and walked over to the bed. He didn’t sit down, he just stood there…looking you straight in the eyes.

You stared at him from across the room, arms crossed, trying your best to appear stern despite the fact that the entire room smelled of him and it was making you want to crawl up in a ball on the floor, like a cat waiting to be cuddled.

"come here." he said, voice calm yet commanding.

"Bite me "

"I said come here."

"And I said bite me."

"If you come here then maybe I will."

You rolled your eyes but did as he said.

"Now what?" You asked in the most pissed-off voice you could muster.

Steve saw right passed your bratty behaviour, knowing exactly what you needed from him. He grabbed your wrist and before you knew it, you were wrapped against him with your back pressed to his muscular chest.

"Now you let me make you feel good, sweetheart." his warm minty breath caressed the shell of your ear, making the hair at the back of your neck stand up as goosebumps started to spread all the way down to your spine.

Steve slowly walked you both to the bed, arms still holding you at the wrists crossed on your lower belly.

When your knees hit the bed he let go of your hands, not allowing you to go far as he immediately grabbed your shirt and slowly pealed it over your head. A soft growl erupting from deep within his throat when he discovered you weren't wearing a bra.

You spun around in his grip, and a small moan escaped you right before you attached your lips to his. Your fingers pulled at the back of his hair while his found their way to your awaiting breasts.

Thoroughly enjoying each other's embrace, your impatient fingers moved down his torso and tugged at his shirt. Feeling his lips curl into a smile against yours let you know he got the message. Within the blink of an eye, his shirt was gone and his lips were back on yours, devouring you as if you were his very last meal.

When you were both breathless, he spun you back around. He pressed gentle yet firm kisses on your nape. His big, strong hands held you up by your upper arm as his furry chest pressed against your bare back.

"Lay down for me, Princess." his gruff voice vibrated against your shoulder.

Steve slowly pushed you down on the bed, holding your hips steady so your ass was up in the air. He peppered your entire back with soft, warm kisses. Not leaving an inch of your body untouched. Your face was planted in the soft cotton sheets below you and you felt your entire body relax. Steve's plump lips moved down to your lowers back and started kissing along the curve of your hip as his large hands roamed your ass. Just as you noticed you had begun to smile to yourself, you got pulled from the cloud you were happily floating on by a sharp pain on your behind.

"AH!! Did you just bite me?!"

"'I'm a man of my word darling."

Before you could scramble away from him he licked a firm stripe up your pussy, all the way from your clit to your asshole. You let out a desperate moan that quickly turned into a squeal as Steve flipped you over on your back. He wasted no time in attaching his soft lips to your dripping pussy once again and absolutely devouring you with all he had.

One of his hands came up to play with your boobs. Squeezing the soft flesh and tugging at your nipples blindly while his head stayed buried in between your thighs. He moved his hand to yours and linked your fingers together as he passionately ate you out. Your other hand came to scratch through his hair, enjoying the feel of his fluff locks between your fingers.

Keeping his one hand intertwined with yours, he moved his other one to play with your pussy. His thumb stroking your clit while his tongue licked in between your folds. God he loved the taste of you, he simply couldn't get enough.

Your moans got louder and your hips started bucking against his bearded jaw. Every square inch of your body was on fire.

Steve switched his hand and tongue placement, moving his mouth up to lick your clit while sliding his middle finger inside of you, pumping a few times before adding a second one, curling them perfectly against your g-spot as he kept licking your clit.

"Fuck Steve I'm gonna cum!" you screamed. "You're gonna make me cum! You're gonna...I'm gonna...Oh fuck..fuck, please! Don't fucking stop...ah!"

And he didn't, not even taking a break to reply to your pleas, he kept eating you out until you were shaking and cumming all over his face.

Blinking away tears until they rolled down your cheeks, you tried to calm down your breathing as you laid there trembling on his bed.

"What do you need, princess." Steve finally spoke, sitting up between your legs and softly stroking your thighs.

It took a while for your breathing to calm down, you didn't even know why you were crying to be honest. You just felt like you were experiencing a lot of emotions at once, and it was pretty intense.

"A fucking hug." you finally spoke.

Steve chuckled at your reply before scooting over to sit next to you, leaning against the headboard.

"Come here."

Slowly, you crawled into his open arms, curling up against him into a ball with your head right under his pecs, leaning on his abs.

Surprisingly, Steve was very soft and sweet, not at all what he was usually like with you.

He rubbed your back and just laid there with you, enjoying each others warmth and the comfortable silence that had settled in the room.

You couldn't help but let out more tears, softly sniffling into his chest as you clung to him.

"shhh" he whispered comfortingly, pressing a few kisses to the top of your head. "It's okay, l'm here. And you did so so good."

For the next few minutes Steve just held you, until you were ready to talk to him about what exactly it was that got you so overwhelmed.

After some time, you sat up and just looked at Steve. At his eyes, his nose, his mouth.

You leaned in and pressed a soft kiss against his lips.

"Thanks," you said.

"For the orgasm?" he joked, trying to get rid of some of the tension.

"For the care," you replied, meaning what you said.

Your eyes fell on the clear bulge in his pants.

"Want me to do something about that, Cap?" you smiled.

"Nah, not today sweetheart." He said, pulling you closer.

You didn't even know what to say. Never in your life have you expected Steve to be so caring, especially not for you.

"If you want you can take a shower here, I'll lend you something comfy to sleep in," he suggested, leaving you even more stunned.

"Okay who are you and what have you done with Steven Rogers."

At first he chuckled at your reaction, but then his face grew a little more serious.

"I wanna be here for you for more than just fucking. The whole cat and mouse game was fun while it lasted, but seeing you the way I saw you today, so exhausted you could barely stand up straight. I never wanna see you like that again, baby. Unless of course, it's my doing." he added smugly before pressing another kiss to your lips.

"There he is again." you chuckled against his lips.

After some more kisses and giggles, you decided to accept Steves's offer and take a long hot shower, followed by some much-deserved cuddles and a movie you never saw the end of because you drifted off, happily snuggled against his chest.

Taglist;

@metalbuckaroo

@princessayveke

@montsepliego

@scxrletrecsmarvel

@hopelesslyrogers

@eclecticpatrolroadlawyer

@tfandtws

@vicmc624

@ahahafudge

@enchantedbarnes

@wickedravyn

@pono-pura-vida

@amayaraestyles

@matchat3a

@fictional-hooman

@sebastianexplicit

@peaches1958

[zee-has-commitment-issues]

twenty questions for fic writers

Thank you @altruistic-meme for the tag! 💜

How many works do you have on AO3? Currently sitting at 25 works!

What’s your total AO3 word count? 502,854 (holy shit)

What fandoms do you write for? Right now I only write for Young Royals. I might branch out in the future, but my mind is pretty all-consumed at the moment.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? (a list not one person is surprised by) 1. Simon Eriksson: Just Some Guy From Biology Simon is a little shit, but it's a whole lot of fun. 2. Screwed Erik lived, but things are still royally screwed up. 3. Love Bites The Hickey Crack Fic no one asked for. 4. Simon Eriksson: Not Really Just Some Guy An unhinged continuation of Simon Eriksson: Just Some Guy From Biology, in which Simon is still a little shit, but it's really not his fault this time. 5. You Have Reached The Voicemail Box Of... Humiliating table shenanigans.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? As often as I can! I try my best. I've gotten better at it more recently, but sometimes it still takes me a million years to reply. I apologize. But I really appreciate people who take the time to comment on my fics, and I try to let them know that.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? The Last Time which is ironically my least read fic. It is my masterpiece, though. My Nilcent no-happy-ending fic. Truly one of the best things I have ever written, in my humble opinion.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I couldn't figure it out, so I asked Dani. She says the answer is Simon Eriksson: Just Some Guy From Biology and she is probably right.

Do you get hate on fics? Not really. This fandom is pretty chill about that kind of stuff. The only thing was that there was one anon who told me I was too obsessed with Swedish while writing a fic. Even thought the show is... quite literally Swedish...

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Once. I wrote one blowjob. The readers said it was good, but I am very unsure. They may be lying to me. Also I don't like men and my beta is asexual so we are quite possibly the worst pair to be writing gay sex.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I haven't and I don't have any current plans to.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not a whole fic, no, but I have had someone steal a few paragraphs word for word 💀

Have you ever had a fic translated? Not translated, but I have had one of my fics turned into a podfic by @willesworld, which was super super cool! [Podfic] Simon Eriksson: Just Some Guy From Biology

What’s your all-time favorite ship? Wilmon of course! Although I have delulu'ed a bit too close to the sun with Nilcent and my quite literally made up Erik/Ebba.

What’s a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Lightning Strikes. It was a Felice and Walter friends fic that takes place in their second year. I realized recently that I have put Walter through the absolute ringer with his fanfictional queer journey and this story was literally no different and I felt bad. I stopped writing this fic because I felt bad for a fiction character going through a fan fiction plot.

What are your writing strengths? I have a really hard time giving myself compliments, especially with writing, so I'm not really sure. I think I do pretty well with characterizations, though.

What are your writing weaknesses? Grammar and being repetitive. My grammar sucks ass. Dani fixes way too much. And I feel like I'm quite repetitive. Not necessarily in a whole-plot kind of way, but in a small detail kind of way. If I like a little thing I added, I'll keep it going throughout the fic or multiple fics (ie. Walter's queer journey, Wilhelm's favorite color being green, Fredrika's nickname being Freddy)

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Go for it. I do it sometimes (but I usually add the translation somewhere). I think it's fun, and ultimately I write for me.

First fandom you wrote for? DIVERGENT LMFAO

Favorite fic you’ve written? Oh I love them all. It's like having to choose a favorite child. But I have some fics that are just way too close to my heart. Screwed is always going to be one that sticks out because it brought so many people around me and I met so many new friends. The Thing In The Mirror is very much a love letter to my own grief and I cherish it deeply. And Reckless Abandon has taken so much of my time to craft and plot that I lowkey might just turn it into a novel lmao.

tagging: @insomnaticwilmon @the-navistar-carol and @willesworld if y'all want to participate 💜

[i-luv-carl-grimes]

☾꙳all the things I hate about you☀︎꙳pt.2

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Chandler Riggs x Fem! reader

Summary: you recently got booked for an acting job playing a character in the walking Dead, it just so happens that you play the love interest for a character named Carl Grimes played by Chandler Riggs, and you soon realize you two hated one another

Warning: swearing and mention of blood

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"Miss Y/n L/n, we are more than pleased to tell you that you have been excepted for the role of c/n (u can name ya character<3) we are happy to have you on our team, the first shoot will be in 3 months on October 24, see you soon!" my mom read, my knees hit the ground and tears dressed my cheeks in ribbons.

"I'M GONNA BE BEST FRIENDS WITH A FAMOUS PERSON!!!" f/n yelled hugging me I just sat there shocked almost as if nothing that was happening really happened. 'We are happy to have you a part of our team' that ran through my head over and over again. "Why are you crying?" F/n asked only making me cry more. "I don't know!!" I yelled and lunged into her hug. "I'm so jealous you get to meet Norman (the actor for Daryl) you HAVE to let me say hi to him I think I might actually pass out," he said, her obsession with Norman was always big almost as big as mine for Chandler. "I will," I said my voice still wobbly and breaking as I whipped tears from my eyes. "Y/n you got a... Twitter? The notification" my mom said handing my phone and almost immediately started screaming and jumping around like an idiot.

"HOLY SHIT!" I screamed looking at the notification then f/n looked at my phone. "Holy shit..." she said. "Language!" my mom yelled. I then ran upstairs and jumped on my bed only to scream and violently kick my legs as if the cutest boy ever just followed me...oh wait. "Don't you play his love interest?" f/n asked, my legs stopped and fell, and my screams quieted, only to scream louder and my legs to move faster and harder. "I GET TO BE CARL FUCKING RIGGS LOVE INTEREST" I screamed with probably one of the stupidest looks on my face. "Geez n/n calm down, oh but God PLEASE let me meet Norman," she said and I sat up remembering... Georgia... Oh. "Of course, I will f/n! As long as you take care of yourself, please promise me that" I said walking over to her and grabbing her shoulders. "I promise," she said and pulled me into a hug. "What if he has a girlfriend," I said and f/n started to laugh. "God would you calm down your never this talkative," she said in between laughs. "HOW CAN I NOT BE!? I'M LITERALLY GONNA MEANT SOMEONE I'VE ADMIRED SINCE I WAS 8!!!" I said and f/n started laughing more I then jokingly passed her my mother then came upstairs

"Hun, how are we gonna tell your father?" she asked. "Oh....simple we don't" I replied in a cold tone. "We can't just tell him," she said and I started to pick at my sick (cuticles). "He lives in Georgia anyway" I scuffed. "I guess your right," she said then walked out. As I felt the skin in my fingers rip and blood going on my nails. "Y/n your picking at your skin again," f/n said and I looked down to see a re-open wound on my thumb, I just walked into the bathroom and grabbed a band-aid to wrap around it, "sorry about that," I said putting on a small forced smile. "It's fine, YOU SHOULD POST ON TWITTER," she said and I immediately jumped on my bed and took a screenshot of the email (keeping out the parts where it shows who sent it), and opened Twitter.

@u/n

Thank you so much for this moment and over all opportunity

I then posted it and turned to look at my ceiling with an ear-to-ear smile. "Y/N F/N WE'RE GOING TO A FANCY RESTAURANT TO CELEBRATE BE READY AT 6" my mom yelled I looked at my phone '3:30' we still have a while, my phone vibrated and I look to see a notification

@/g/u/n (just put someone u don't like)

I cant believe YOU of all people got the part I feel bad for Chandler

She said and I felt my heart drop, I hated e/n (enemy name), we used to be best friends to the point where we went everywhere together, on trips to the beach and having sleepovers every week that was until middle school, then she changes she began hanging out with this group of girls that for some reason NEVER liked me and she quickly joined them. But we were still friends weird right? well not to her I soon found out she was only using me to get with the boy I 'liked' the more I really think about it the more I realize I didn't even love him, I liked the thought of 'loving someone I really don't think I've ever been in an actual relationship, I mean I've never even thought of what love feels like. "geez is that thing still on your ass" F/n asked and I nodded. "Y/n, you playing Chandler fucking Rigg's love interest she doesn't have anything on you," she said making me feel better

-time skip-

it was now 5:30 and I had just gotten out of the shower, "hey F/n what should I do with my hair" I asked while she was picking out our outfits. "um...just wear it down don't worry about it" she said, I then grabbed a curling iron and put it to my hair, when I was done I put on light makeup, mascara, foundation and a bit of blush. "alright Y/n I got your outfit!" f/n yelled and I walked out of the bathroom and back to my room to see an outfit laying on the bed with f/n standing over it proudly. it was a black dress with a slit down the side of it as well as black heels. "f/n you now have I feel about wearing things like this" I said a bit hesitant to wear something that shows so much skin and overall looked like it would attract a lot of attention. "you an actor now! act like it and plus this dress isn't even a lot it's so simple" she said and I sighed. "whatever you say" I said while grabbing the dress and heels. "you know you gonna have to get over your attention problem your playing in a show that more than a million people have watched, you are going to be the center of attention everywhere you go from now on" she said and I leaned against the backroom door. "I know," I said before closing the door and changing into the dress. when I walked out f/n was already changed and covered her mouth with her hands and stared at me. "stop staring!" I said getting uncomfortable for how long she had been looking at me, "not only is my best friend famous but she's also so incredibly beautiful, I've won at life," she said and I turned away in embarrassment. "shut up, if we're on the topic lets talk about how beautiful my best friend is," I said and she chuckled. "as always still can't take a compliment" she teased and I pushed her. "girls, its time to go," my mom said and I up on a brown overcoat and a cream scarf (remember this takes place in autumn). We then went to my mom's car and drove to a very fancy restaurant.

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I hope you all enjoyed this chapter I'll post the next one tomorrow!!

[unstablebasementgoblin]

So, this one is going to be fun. I know I've barely done anything with this blog so far, but maybe that's why this is the perfect place to rant. Also, there's a high chance nobody will ever read this, so that's making me a bit less nervous.

This whole thing is about my boyfriend of 4 years. He's 25, I'm 26 in case this matters. I've noticed for a while now that something's up with him, but due to some issues on his part, he's never able to talk about things that weigh on him unless he's drunk, and he doesn't really drink.

A few days ago, it finally happened. He went out with a few friends, and I joined them a bit later, since I had an event earlier that evening. When I arrived at the bar, he wasn't there, and a mutual friend told me that he was talking to his best friend in the forest nearby. Keep in mind that every time this has happened, a big bomb has been dropped. I thought something bad had happened when he came back and asked me to talk outside. He then told me that he's asexual and that he's not sure what to do about the relationship with me. The first part of that revelation was fine with me, but the second part took me out of it.

Something about me: I identify as a pan-cis woman. I actually thought for a while that I might be just asexual, but I figured that I still had some feelings that could be considered sexual. I have PTSD as well, so there's that. Plus, I'm starting to have the realization that I might be autistic and never really got the "How does sex work?" part besides the biologic aspect of it. This means I am actually okay with not having sex, and I know fully well what this means. Before him, I also only had sex once in every past relationship (it felt like I had to) and hated one-night stands. Actually, I only had one and disliked it so much that I felt sick afterward.

The next day, I asked him if he's aro as well, and he said no. So I'm stuck in a limbo in which he doesn't know what to do. I think he might not choose the thing that's right for him because he doesn't want to hurt my feelings, and I really hate this whole uncertainty thing.

(Hold on, I think I might be partially asexual as well. And I should go to a therapist about the autism thing, since the only things stressing me out are me being the cause of unhappiness and the state of knowledge limbo I'm in... Holy shit, writing out some stuff without pressure helps immensely... I need a cookie.)