#it's so sad yet pretty and aaa

[cyberrose2001]

TFP Optimus x human!fem!reader

"ROSE I'M FREAKING OUT AAA I LOVE YOUR WRITING!! I am currently watching Prime so reading your Optimus fluff made my heart skip a beat! May I ask for more Optimus x reader (in a female perspective) fluff, and in a common situation like preparing for something humanly important (a ball perhaps)?? I don't got too many ideas but I would love to read anything coming from you! Please stay well 🌹❤️" - requested by @weaksall

Thank you so much!! This was such a cute idea! I found this amazing dress that I think is just gorgeous for this fic -> https://www.pinterest.com.au/pin/706713366535507663/

I also didn't specify any hairstyles too because not everyone has long hair that they can style <3 I hope this is satisfactory!! 💕

Warnings: None! Just fluff

Word count: 1618

Today is a rather important day for you. Your work is hosting a gala ball to raise money for charity, and you are required to attend. You had never been to a ball and the thought of picking out grand outfits to wear and accessories has always excited you. Miko, of course, wanted to help you go shopping at the small selection of boutiques that Jasper has to offer. She may be into the alternative type of fashion, but the young girl has a passion for all types.

“Oh! What about this one, (Y/n)?” Miko drags you by the arm towards yet another boutique. You almost stumble as the stacks of boxes you’re holding pretty much blind your vision.

“Miko!” You laugh, “I think I have enough dresses to last me the rest of my life.”

“Oh, come on! You never know when you need…” She pauses to count the boxes in your hand, “Four, five…. eight outfits!”

You roll your eyes as you let her drag you into the boutique. Looking around, you don’t see anything that catches your eye. However, Miko is practically running around the joint pointing at different dresses and sending your mind for a spin.

“Miko, let’s just go.” It was your turn to drag her through the shop, as much as you love her, if you spent another hour dress shopping with her you were sure you would lose whatever brain cells you had left.

Before you could drag a sad Miko out the door, you spotted a gorgeous navy-blue ball gown that sparkled like the night sky. It had a heart shaped neckline with lace trimmings around the edges that tapered off to create a small off the shoulder sleeves. And by the all spark, you had to have it.

Miko followed your eyes towards the gown, and she grinned, “Do you want to try it out?”

-

It had been a week since Miko accompanied you to the boutiques and today was the gala ball. You had set up a small makeup station in the human area of the base, Miko of course going through it all trying to find the best shades of eyeshadows and lipsticks to use and making a mess.

“Alright, (Y/n),” Miko held out two sticks of lipsticks, “Purple or blue? Oh! What about GLITTER? OR- “

You wished you could rub your eyes in frustration, but you didn’t want to ruin your foundation, “Miko, sweetheart, how about a nice neutral shade? It’s a gala not a drag show.”

Miko dramatically tosses the lipsticks back into the makeup bag, “Yeah but you would look so cool!”

As you were applying your contour, blush and the colours of the eyeshadows that Miko picked out for you (they were colours you liked thank goodness), Optimus Prime had walked over towards the human area, curious about the commotion.

“(Y/n),” He looks around at all the different things that are scattered around on the floor, “May I ask what this is all for?”

You froze. You had not expected the boss bot himself to ask about makeup, Arcee maybe, but not Optimus. It doesn’t help the fact that you have been in love with Optimus since you first met him, but the way his eyes fill with curiosity as he asks the question warms your heart a little bit. You exhaled and placed the makeup brush you held in your hand down.

“Today is a really important event for my job, they’re hosting a huge charity gala to raise money to help sick kids.” You explained as best as you could to the bot, but you could read his face and tell that he was still a little bit confused.

“A… gala?” He raises an optic ridge.

“Yeah, it’s like a really fancy party.” You smiled, “You get to wear nice clothes, socialise with other people and- “

“And there’s LOTS of fancy food!” Miko butted in, “I’m talkin’ seafood, barbeques and sooooo many desserts…”

Optimus glances towards the young girl, then back to you.

“So, this gala,” He begins, “It is a culturally significant gathering for humans?”

You nod your head, picking up the makeup brush again, “Yeah, it’s a way for humans to come together for a cause, or just to have fun and make friends!”

Optimus hums and that makes you seem to think that he is satisfied with your answer. He watches as you delicately swivel the brush over your eyelids, admiring the movement of your hands. Your focus may be on the mirror, but you can feel his eyes on you.

“You mentioned nice clothes,” Optimus says, “Are you planning to wear something… ‘fancy’?”

“You don’t get to see that yet!” Miko perks up, she then grabs two lipsticks and holds them out to Optimus. “But you can help (Y/n) pick a lipstick colour, she doesn’t like MY choices."

You can feel your face heat up as you watch Optimus’s optics flicker between the two lipsticks with a raised optical ridge. You really do hope that Miko knows what she is doing.

-

It was noon, you and Miko had just finished the last touches and adjustments to your gown. You had brought a large mirror to the base so you can fully see yourself in the reflection, safe to say that you looked like a literal princess. Miko jumps up and down as she admires her work.

“(Y/n)!! You look so beautiful!” Miko squeals as she pulls you into a hug.

“Thank you, Miko.” You laugh at her energy, hugging her back. One would think that you were getting married by the way she reacts to you.

“I can’t wait to see what Optimus thinks of you.” She grins. You pull her out of the hug and give her a confused look.

“What do you mean?” Your heart is racing fast, “Why would Optimus care about how I look?”

Miko gives you a dead-panned stare, dropping her arms to the side, “Are you kidding me? Have you seen the way he looks at you, (Y/n)?”

Of course you have, but you’ve always thought that those were a different kind of stare, not because he… likes you.

“No," You lied, staring at yourself in the mirror again, “Even if he did, I doubt that he would have time for me, he is the leader of the Autobots… he has enough on his plate as it is.”

Miko rolls her eyes and leans against you, “Don’t sell yourself short, he is gonna faint when he sees you.”

She then takes your hand, dragging you out of the room, “Come on, it’s nearly time to leave anyway.”

You let her drag you out, what Miko said is now engraved into your brain and is now on a constant replay. Have you seen the way he looks at you?

Whilst you were distracted by the thoughts in your head, Miko had stopped you just before the door to the main area of the base, “Wait here, I’m gonna go and make sure that everyone is ready.”

“Ready for what?” You tried to question her, but she shushed you as she ran off. You’re awkwardly standing there now, occasionally fluffing your gown. You haven’t the slightest clue on what she is up to.

A few moments later, Miko calls out, “Ok (Y/n), come out now!”

You take a deep breath as you walk out, holding you gown to keep it from dragging on the floor. Your heart is practically jumping out of your chest.

You walk out to a crowd consisting off all of team prime, some are stunned to silence, and some are cooing and gushing about how beautiful you look. You decided to give yourself a boost of confidence and give them a twirl, the base of the gown flaring out as you do so.

“Wow, you clean up real good, kid.” Wheeljack nods with folded arms. Bumblebee and Bulkhead (with Miko perched on his shoulder) are practically swooning, Arcee is admiring your hair and makeup, Smokescreen is telling you how amazing you look, and Ratchet is scoffing about how silly this all is, but secretly he thinks that you look nice. Jack and Raf are also enamoured.

Optimus, however, is simply stunned to silence. His dermas slightly agape and a blue hue ever so slightly creeps onto his face. He loves the way the gown flows and the small intricate details on your torso, and he thinks the colour of the dress suits you perfectly. The lipstick he picked out for you was a classic red lip with a slight tinge of purple. And he now understands why humans were obsessed with the stuff; he could not stop staring.

You shyly thanked everyone for the compliments and noticed that Optimus had stepped closer to you and leaned down. You stiffen up a little bit as he held out a servo towards you, he touches the dress very gently.

“You look absolutely exquisite, (Y/n).” Optimus says, optics now staring into your eyes. Your cheeks flush at his words. You then gently took the digit that was toying with your gown and gave it a hug.

“Thank you, Optimus.” You smiled, you were sure that he could feel your heartbeat against his servo, “Do you think the lip colour ties it all together?”

His face flushed as you winked at him and then he smiled, knowing that he was the one that picked it out, “Indeed.”

Off to the side out of view while you and Optimus are sharing a sweet moment, Miko is holding out her hand so that a defeated Bulkhead can hand her an imaginary dollar bill, “Told ya he had the hots for her.”

[yeenybeanies]

This is sort of a two-parter

Was part of why Price was so sad to see that Soap had hybridized himself because he knew it effectively halved his life expectancy? (Just saw your new tweet about hybrids rarely living past 50) and did Soap know it would do that?

Additionally would Gaz be any sort of exception because his species is so long lived? Or would it be burning the candle on both ends because he never stops growing, hence taxing his body faster

And then pt 2.

You said Ghost is effectively blind, how does that affect him with using firearms and how did the task force find out about that? I imagine he doesn't go about advertising it

aaaa i'm LIVING for these questions aaa thank youuuu!!!

putting under a cut bc it's a lil lengthy.

SO yes! that is definitely part of why price was sad! i haven't worked out a full timeline yet of events but price has been a hybrid for most of his military career (underwent the change when he was 19; he is currently 37, but him reuniting with soap was probably a couple of years ago). price was pretty well-informed on what hybridization would/could do to him, & how it would, among other things, shorten his lifespan.

when he was mentoring soap early on, working to get him into the SAS, soap had expressed a passing interest in undergoing hybridization, but price strongly advised against it. said he didn't need it. truly no one needed it. never went into much detail, though. soap didn't bring it up much after, so price figured it was settled. moved on.

so, when price does reunite with soap after soap's hybridization––which he did without telling price (he wasn't obligated to, & hadn't talked to him in a while)––price feels more than anything a sense of guilt. regret. like it's his fault for not doing more to talk soap out of essentially ruining his life.

made worse still because soap wasn't fully informed on what hybridization does. not for a lack of trying to find out so much as he was more or less lied to about it. he was fed the perks, while the downsides were downplayed or omitted.

gaz would not be an exception partially for your reasoning, yes. the continuous growing, even if it's slow, does tax the body significantly. & crocodilian longevity, it doesn't counteract the other strain that's put on the body as a result of the hybridization. the fact of the matter is that human bodies are not meant to be spliced together with these animals, & hybridization is not done with the recipient's health in mind. hybrids are created to be tools & weapons. so long as they can do what they were made to do, that's good enough.

so ghost is largely blind, yes. pretty much entirely blind in his left eye, & his vision is still pretty bad in his right eye. he can detect light (which he is still very sensitive to, despite the poor vision) & shapes, but not much else. he does wear contacts/corrective lenses, though. not a whole lot can be done for his left eye, but it's salvageable in his right, which is the eye that he shoots with anyway. it gives him decent enough distance vision that, with a scope, he can snipe just fine. (reading things up close, however, is a bit more of a challenge, as the contacts make him far-sighted.)

for closer situations, he doesn't really rely on sight at all. he instead uses his sense of smell, hearing, & echolocation. & he's damn good with it too. most people don't know that he's almost blind, because he moves & behaves like anyone with decent vision would. he tracks movement with his eyes, makes eye contact, & he can fight/shoot perfectly at close/medium range. hell, he can shoot better than most because he can work in pitch black with ease, & he doesn't need to be facing a target to know it's there.

price does pick up on the blindness almost immediately, since he's known ghost the longest & was there to help him adjust to his forced hybridization. & also because he's price. ghost knows gaz the next-longest, & probably just ends up telling him eventually. gaz suspected something was up (bc ghost is always wearing sunglasses, even at night), but never asked, & certainly didn't think that ghost's vision was as bad as it actually is. that surprised him, considering how ghost can still snipe. soap likely figures it out on his own after a while. just because of how his relationship is/grows with ghost & how close they end up becoming. soap is observant. notices how ghost squints sometimes, how he occasionally asks someone to read or summarize something to him, & other small things. & he might not ask about it either, but he'll start doing things to try & accommodate. writing/drawing things bigger. offering to read stuff for ghost (or just doing it unprompted). sharing audiobooks & music he thinks ghost would like. & when ghost does admit that he's mostly blind, soap's just like. oh. i know, but i'm glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me 🥰

[mr-wrestlemania]

Hart-Break Hotel

The WWF superstars are staying at a nearby hotel for their upcoming show but two performers seem to be checking in each other's rooms on purpose. Will they check out of the hotel with their hearts in one piece? Or were they never whole to begin with?

Contains: Drug mentions(Allusions for the most part, reference to weed), Intoxication of one character

(its my first Hartbreak fic aaa enjoy the food)

Ao3 link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/58070596

"Owen!!!" Bret kicked the room to his shared room with Owen but was only met with quiet laughter on the other side.

"Oh, so sorry, I guess there was no pizza guy." Owen hummed as his voice grew distant.

"Owen I swear to god, OPEN THE DOOR!" Bret tried to shout as quietly as he could. If his fellow athletes saw him half naked in the hallway, he'd ask Undertaker to bury him right then and there.

After a few minutes of silence, Bret sighed anxiously. "Maybe Davey will house me. Owen seems to think this is hilarious," He thought, "But what floor is he on?!"

Just then, Bret could hear a door open behind him, and there stood his on-screen rival Shawn. He yawned but suddenly looked wide awake when he noticed Bret's predicament. "Whats the matter, Bret? Having a bit of..trouble?" His cat-like smirk made Bret want to punch his lights out.

"It's nothing. Owen and I had a spat, now he thinks he's being funny." Bret pressed his ear on the door, only to be met by the sound of Owen lightly snoring. "Fucks sake.."

Shawn leaned on his door frame with his arms crossed, "I'd say cozy up in the lobby, but they might think you're some bum. I almost wish I had my Polaroid with me." His eyes drank in the scene much to Bret's annoyance.

"Good thing you don't." Bret sighed and picked himself off the carpet, "Look. Do you happen to know where Davey Boy's room is?"

"Mmmmmm, no." Shawn hummed, "Looks like you're shit out of luck."

"Dammit Michaels!" Bret whisper shouted, "Okay..Could I.."

Shawn perked and tilted his head, "Yeah? Could I what?"

Bret swallowed his pride best he could. "Could I just wait until morning in your room? Unless you'd rather be a dick this late at night."

"Say, please." Shawn grinned.

"What?"

"You heard me, c'mon."

"You're insufferable."

Shawn scoffed, "A simple, polite gesture is hardly insufferable. What's a simple please between friends?"

Bret sighed through his nose, "..Please Shawn?"

"No." Shawn started to close his door and laughed at Bret's expression. "I'm kidding lighten up. That was nice to hear, c'mon."

The fact that Shawn was actually letting him in was a surprise, but Bret was still on guard. Shawn's hotel room looked about how he expected. His gear was in an organized mess in the corner by the box TV, but his outfit for the next day was already neatly laid out on a table by the window. Not to mention, his hair care products littered the bathroom from what he could see. An odd yet familiar smell jolted his sinuses when Shawn shut the door behind him.

"Were you smoking pot in here???" Bret turned to Shawn.

Shawn snickered, "A little. Not enough to get me in trouble. Don't look at me like that it helps me sleep, not to mention it soothes the body, Hart." He opened the only window to let some of the air out. "Could you smell it from the hallway?"

"No." Bret sat down on the armchair, "I suppose it's better than the other stuff floating around the locker room."

Shawn shut the window and plopped on his bed, "Oh hell yeah, man. I'm trying to avoid some of it since I want to keep my smile perfect. Seen a few guys almost miss the tar in their teeth. Ugh."

"I know what you mean. It's sad to see, honestly. I've been worried about you, yknow. How deep you've gone into it."

The blonde's gaze drifted toward the ceiling, "..I know, Bret. I'm trying to play it safe. Keep things good for business."

"You're putting in the work. It's pretty obvious to me." Bret smiled lightly, and Shawn glanced back at the ceiling.

It was strange at how casual their conversation felt. For a while, Shawn was nearly impossible to talk to when he would say something that brought too much heat. Yet, in that moment, it felt like they could breathe.

"What? You're staring." Shawn rolled over to look back at Bret.

"Sorry. I just don't remember the last time we were this open." Bret stretched until his muscles felt less tight.

"Mm. Fair." Shawn looked up at the ceiling, "You caught me in a good mood. Or I guess a thoughtful one. I was thinking too much and couldn't sleep when I heard you like an angry moose out there."

"Was that a Canadian joke?" Bret raised a brow.

"A piss poor one. I can do better."

"Don't." Bret rolled his eyes and tried to shift into a comfortable position, but the armchair wasn't exactly a recliner. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Shawn was still glancing at him. "Is this funny to you?"

Shawn shrugged and threw a pillow directly at Bret's face. "You better not be this pathetic all the time. I expected better from someone almost as good as me." He teased with a smile.

Bret grunted but had a slight smile, "Almost??? It's too late to be cutting a promo Shawn, do you ever give your ego a rest?"

"Maybe. I let you in, didn't I?" He flipped over so his backside faced Bret.

The hum of the air conditioner in the room coated the room. Though, it only made the silence more deafening. Bret couldn't entirely tell if Shawn was being genuinely nice or just getting some entertainment from his situation. Yet it made him smile to see more of Shawn beyond his ego. The glamor. The 'sexy boy'. He was just Shawn in that room with him.

He looked down at the pillow, then back at Shawn. Shawn was already fast asleep, evident by his quiet snoring. It was rare to see Shawn so still and at complete peace.

Why would he care anyway? It didn't matter. He may have had Vince wrapped around his finger, but Bret refused to play into it. Yet part of him seemed drawn to Shawn. Was it his skills as a performer? He had little respect for the business at times, but did he really?

Even in their brief conversation, Shawn picked up on things that bothered Bret and didn't even comment on it. Yet he looked out for him. Why?

Bret sighed quietly and tried to get comfortable once more. The pillow helped his neck, at least. Before he knew it, he was out like a light.

Unbeknownst to him, Shawn rolled back over and opened his eyes to peek at Bret. He didn't know why. Maybe he didn't want to understand why. It was fun to toy with Bret, but to see him asleep was something else. His expression was so calm, and the way he laid out looked so vulnerable. If he would tell his friends about that night, he'd definitely leave this part out. They didn't need to know how it tore him up.

That morning, Bret woke up a little stiff but better than he'd be if he slept on the floor. He rubbed his eyes and was surprised to see Shawn asleep facing him. He quietly got up to check his reflection, call it paranoia from Owen's antics. Shawn didn't do anything to him while he slept. He sighed in relief and quickly decided to take a piss while he had some peace and quiet.

Shawn stirred and sat up to move his hair back. His eyes traveled to the armchair Bret was in and looked around. "Bret?"

"Still here. I'm taking a piss." Bret called back. He emerged from the bathroom and smiled, "What? Afraid I left?"

"Please." Shawn rolled his eyes, "I just wanted to make sure you weren't dicking around. You good?"

"Stiff, but I'm okay." Bret moved when he caught Shawn glancing, "Not like that, you dick."

Shawn snickered as Bret threw the pillow back at him, "We've seen you change Bret. It's nothing new. If you're so pissy about it, use the phone to call your room to wake Owen up and cover up your sharpshooter." Shawn stretched.

"Alright alright. Don't call it that." Bret used the phone near Shawn's bed and tried to dial up his hotel room. It took a few rings before he heard Owen's groggy voice on the other end.

"Mmhh.. hello?"

"Owen. I'm gonna knock at the door three times, and you better let me in." Bret growled.

"Oh shit. Look, I'm sorry I was going to let you in. I was just wiped. Did you find some place to crash?"

Bret glanced at Shawn for a moment, who was brushing his hair out, "You could say that. Just meet me at the damn door okay?"

"Okay, geez.."

Bret hung up the phone and got up, "Alright, I'm out of your hair." He paused mid walk towards the door and looked back at Shawn. "Thanks."

Shawn stopped and turned his head towards Bret. His mouth opened but quickly shut as he turned around. "Sure. See you."

"..See you." Bret left Shawn's room quickly and dashed to his room for Owen to let him in.

"You aren't mad right..?" Owen smiled sheepishly.

"We'll see after breakfast. I just really want to put some clothes on." Bret started slipping some jeans on as Owen watched.

"Right. Where did you stay anyway?"

Bret paused, his head turned away from Owen as he cleared his throat, "Not important."

The image of Shawn's sleeping face came to Bret's mind, but he quickly shook it off with a fury. "Did I miss breakfast? What time is it?"

"Shit!" Owen nearly ran him over to get dressed, "Come on! It should still be going! If not I'll treat you to Mckies! Promise!"

"Deal." Bret ran close behind him.

There were a few familiar faces getting food at the complimentary breakfast. The staff went a little extra considering how many celebrity wrestlers were staying there. Bret watched Owen practically beeline for some powdered donuts and chuckled. He nearly spilled his coffee from a guy being shoved into him.

"Oops! Sorry, Bret." Hunter laughed, "Didn't burn ya did I?"

"No." Bret replied flatly.

Shawn peeked out and beamed, "Whoops. No harm done, right? Especially after last night."

"Last night?" Hunter raised a brow as he glanced between them.

Bret nearly choked on his coffee and whipped around, "Shut your mouth, Shawn."

"No, Shawn, please elaborate. I'm very curious about what happened last night." Hunter could hardly contain his giggles.

"Nothing. Owen locked me out of our room, and..Shawn let me crash."

Shawn clicked his tongue, "Spoil sport."

"Really? Huh." Hunter hummed as he thought, "How nice of you, Shawn. Gonna invite him later for a second night?"

"Fuck you." Shawn shoved him again with a smile.

"Hey! Quit phrasing shit like that!" Bret grunted.

"Oh, how scandalous.." Dustin Rhodes chuckled as he walked past.

"Great." Shawn folded his arms, "If this turns into a new rumor, you're helping me squash it."

Hunter grinned, seemingly satisfied, "I look forward to it. Just be sure to let me have a turn-"

Bret broke away from them to sit with the rest of the Hart foundation as he seethed. He could still faintly hear Hunter and Shawn dick around and it seemed to get to him a little.

"Hey uh..Is it true you stayed the night with Shawn??" Owen whispered.

Bret laid his head down on the table as his face began to heat up, "Mention it again, and you won't have a bed to sleep in tonight."

Jim raised a brow and chuckled, "Don't let him get to you Bret. Owen just punked one of the staff by imitating your old man again. You on a streak Owen?"

Owen smirked, "Maybe." Bret narrowed his eyes at brother, almost wondering if Owen left him out of the room that night on purpose..

The shoot took a bit longer than some of the superstars would have guessed so when it was wrapped up, they scattered to either crash or celebrate. Bret decided he was sober enough to head to the nearest convenience store to get a few snacks for their next upcoming road trip. The crickets and the buzz of the streetlights were almost comforting to Bret. The street ambiance helped relax him as he walked into the hotel's lobby.

Strangely, the hotel's elevator doors kept opening and closing. The worker at the desk seemed to glance over now and then, too tired to actually do anything about it. Bret shared a look with her before he walked over to investigate.

Shawn was fumbling with the buttons, his face flushed but still stood perfectly upright. He glanced up and flashed his usual smile, "Hitmaan! Hey. I was just trying to get back to my room but this thing doesn't work."

"It does Shawn. You're just hitting the door button over and over," Bret squeezed in and hit the button for the third floor, "Are you that plastered?"

"I can still function," Shawn scoffed, "I'm just that talented."

"Enough to walk but not enough to navigate an elevator." Bret smirked as he leaned against the elevator wall.

Shawn rolled his eyes, "I just had some different stuff tonight. No biggie." He leaned against the wall. Whatever he did drink it was hitting him pretty hard.

Bret thought for a moment to consider his options regarding Shawn. When the doors opened, Bret used his free arm to help Shawn off the wall, "Come on. I'm not leaving you to stumble around the halls."

"What a gentleman. I can get around just fine.." Shawn grumbled but didn't fight Bret off as they walked down the hall.

"Don't lie to me. You got your key on you?"

Shawn dug through his pocket and handed Bret the key. Despite his protesting, he seemed aware he couldn't be precise with his hands.

Bret unlocked the door and helped Shawn to his bed. "Just be sure to not miss our morning call."

Something about the way Shawn looked at him made Bret hesitate leaving his bedside. He was celebrating with his group of degenerates, so why did Shawn look so sad?

"Are you okay..?" Bret prayed Shawn was just an emotional drunk but that didn't fit his character from what he remembered.

"You're a great guy, Bret. Everyone respects you y'know. I'm glad we have someone like you..in the locker room.. " Shawn turned his head toward Bret, his words hardly slurred at all.

"I-" Bret blinked a little, he was at a loss.

"My mouth can get me in a lot of trouble, I say shit I don't mean. But you're my favorite rival Bret. Makes me want to be better so I can kick your ass. Fact you use your time for someone like me.. I dunno.."

"You're a great man too, Shawn. I'd be happy to drop a title to someone like you. I mean that."

Shawn stared at Bret for a while until he glanced away. Bret's words stung in a way he couldn't verbalize. Bret respected him so much and yet..

"Will you be okay if I leave? I just wanna make sure."

Shawn took a deep breath, he wanted to say no. "Yeah. I'm just getting sappy I think. I'll just sleep this off..Thanks Bret."

Bret nodded, picked his bag off the floor and walked toward the door to Shawn's room. Shawn watched Bret leave with his eyes glazed over.

Instead of an empty hallway, Bret ran right into Hunter with the door. "Oh shit- Sorry Hunter. You alright?"

Hunter rubbed his forehead, "Yeah.. Damn Hart. What were you doing in Shawn's room??"

Bret shook his head, "Shawn was stuck in the elevator pressing the door button over and over. I helped him get back to his room. He told me he's okay by himself but..Maybe you can watch him?"

"Dammit. I thought he didn't walk here by himself. Thanks for helping him. That's partially my fault since Shawn is really good at managing himself while drunk. Guess this was one of those rare occasions. Did he say anything weird?"

"Kind of emotional. He looked close to crying." Bret sighed, "Something about me being well respected and downplaying himself. It's unlike him."

Hunter tensed and shook his head, "Got it. Sad drunk mode. I got him don't worry."

Bret nodded and left to go to his room. Hunter walked into Shawn's and shut the door.

"Hey buddy, Bret just told me what happened. You wanna talk it out or watch TV?" Hunter sat on the corner of Shawn's bed.

Shawn rubbed his eyes and shrugged, he was annoyed at how watery his eyes were getting. "Bret said he'd happily pass a championship to me man."

"Yeah? He'd put you over like that? Huh." Hunter scratched his neck, "Would you do the same?"

Owen was fast asleep with his leg dangling off the second bed and Bret moved it so he could walk through the room. As he undressed for bed, that moment with Shawn looking at him all sad eyed played through his mind. Part of him almost wished he stayed with Shawn. Falling asleep beside him didn't sound so bad-

"What the hell am I thinking.." Bret sighed and collapsed in his bed. He never noticed how lonely it felt, even if Owen was just in arms in reach.

Shawn had laid with Hunter in his bed, somehow it fit both of them but it certainly helped. He thought of the concerned look Bret had for him and how Bret openly expressed his admiration for him. It made his throat ache.

He looked at his sleeping friend with a quiet gaze, "Would Bret have done this with me..?" Shawn shook his head and laid it down on his pillow. "Doubtful. Why would he.." He found himself dozing off, ignoring his skin's hunger to be held.

[crescencestudio]

Devlog #31 | 05.29.23

Hi everyone!

I am once again bringing you a monthly update. As some of you may know, I recently announced I am participating in Otome Jam this year. With that said, this devlog will be a bit unique in that it will include updates for both "intertwine" (very general updates) and "Alaris" (our usual program of updates) \o/

Writing

Ah, the section that made me sad every time I looked at it for the past two months (kidding, I'm being dramatic). As you all may know, I'm creating a project for OtoJam, "intertwine."

“Would you choose me in every lifetime?”

With another creative project and my dissertation, I was nervous this month that Druk's route was going to make little progress in the writing department yet again.

BUT I AM VERY HAPPY TO SAY THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN OWO

Intertwine has very much given me the creative boost I needed to combat my burnout/rut, and I was able to make a lot of progress on both projects (and my dissertation!). Intertwine script is currently sitting at 15k words and is in the final developmental stage as we speak. I was able to write up a little under half of Druk's script and it currently sits at 20k words!

There are still a couple of scenes I need to go back and write in, but I'm confident they will be easy to write because they're more fun/juicy scenes. Additionally, the remaining half of Druk's route will be pretty action-packed, which is much easier for me to write than the more subtle plot beats. So I'm quite confident I'll be able to finish Druk's route by our next update, which also means Alaris will officially reach the halfway mark for the script!!! AAA. I also wrote 10k words for my dissertation, so I wrote like 50k words this month YAY I WAH

Art

Regarding the art front, most of my attention has been on intertwine this month due to time constraints. I've finished the base sprite, most of the GUI mockups, and some CGs!

We also got this beautiful logo from puchi for the game, and I'm excited to soon show you all more progress pictures ^^

Promo art feat. Vân and Game Logo

For Alaris, Vui continues to hit it out of the park with the backgrounds. I have previews of the Dawn and Dusk Court for you all, and they are beauty! I'm so excited to receive more Fae related BGs from him, though I may not be able to show as many to you all because spoilers from here on out <\3

Dawn Court

Dusk Court

Additional Notes

The remaining soundtracks for Alaris were completed this month by Peter as well! I still am in the process of reviewing them as they're moreso in the draft stages, but they're sounding beautiful so far.

Intertwine will also be featuring voice acting, and with auditions closing soon, we’ll be selecting a voice for Vân as well in the near future ^^

No market research this month, but I did read the Villains Are Destined to Die manhwa and that art and Callisto are so yummy

Anyways, I think that's enough from me, so that is all for this month's update! Stay safe, and see you all next month <3

[crystallinestars]

Hello! I stumbled upon your blog (I dunno still pretty new to tumblr despite being here for years. I don't interact much >_<) while gobbling up the Avenstelle buffet here in tumblr <3.

Anyways. I read the anons asks and your response and omygosh…I've never felt such a relief to find people who shares the same sentiments T_T. Especially the ones with Kaveh and Alhaitham? Gosh. I've never felt so validated about my feelings. Let me get started with Alhaitham.

Okay so in gacha games, (wuwa, hsr, gi, ak, r1999, etc.), I'm a husbando collector. I love collecting the men because they're hot and my eyes love them lol. So…essentially, I also pulled for Alhaitham. I loved him so much, like his personality, his design…I'm smitten. But after how I am bombarded with haikaveh shipping almost every socmed I go, twt mostly, I began to loathe it. Like, I don't really care about shipping. The shipping I only liked is Avenstelle in hsr, yet the incessant shoving of Haikaveh as canon to my face, even though they are not really canonized, just turned me off with Alhaitham, and subsequently, Kaveh as well even though I wanna love him too :(.

It makes me sad that the fandom pushes the only "correct way" to see this characters. How about us, who just wants to have some pixel husbandos for ourselves (lol sorry for the self insert). Kaveh also looks nice and he seems nice and I wanna love him too seeing as we are of the same profession (I'm an architecture student, hopefully passing our thesis and graduating next year!). I am also still on a mission of finding his mom in Fontaine rn (still waiting, hoyo, still waiting…)

Anyways, I am truly glad to see the same sentiments and knowing that I am not alone in noticing this toxicity happening in the fandom coz, what happened to platonic relationships? I dunno, but I really wanna see a heartmelting one and not a shipping one. Aaa I rambled too much haven't I? I'm nervous since this is my first asks. But I just wanna say that you made me feel safe and my heart is overjoyed. Thank you so much. <3 I'm gonna go for now because it's 12:51 am in my country and I need to sleep hahaha! Have a great day!

(Ah, may I please be 🌊 anon? Thankiees!)

Hello 🌊 anon! Thank you for working up the courage and taking the time to write to me. It made me so happy to read that my discussions with other anons made you feel safe. You are definitely not alone in feeling ostracized by the loud portion of fandom. And oh my gosh, you're an architecture student?! That's so cool! Good luck on passing your thesis!

I completely relate to your feeling of losing the love you had for a character due to their popular ship. I'm a Kaveh girlie, but I also like Alhaitham quite a lot since he's a very interesting and relatable character. Unfortunately, the prominence of haikaveh on every social media I visit, and the obnoxious claims of shippers that they're undoubtedly canon, tainted my view of him. I want to love Haitham, but some days it can be hard because seeing him triggers some negative feelings, though I try to push them down. I didn't care for the ship originally, but the behaviours of it's shippers really ruined my perception of it and BL as a whole.

It's only natural you feel that way since so much of the fandom looks down on self-shipping and gatekeeps characters from us. The way Mihoyo handles Haitham and Kaveh in particular doesn't help the situation for yumejoshi, which makes it feel worse.

The only way I find I can have fun is to block and mute all accounts who support the ships I don't like, and peacefully enjoy the content I like. Don't look at comments or the character tags for the sake of your mental health. It sucks that you have to restrict yourself so heavily, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to keep yourself happy.

If you want to find more people with similar sentiments, feel free to join my discord group! There are lots of people who share your views (and who love Alhaitham), and we also have discussions about fandom and characters, and share fanart and fics. It's a bit like a support group for those of us terrorized by the toxicity of fandom. If you don't want to join, that's perfectly fine. No pressure.

I'm glad you found me, though I'm really curious how that happened lol I don't post any Avenstelle here (though my twt is basically pure Avenstelle and Kavehlumi), so it's a wonder how you found my blog by browsing Avenstelle posts. Regardless, welcome! I'm happy to have you here 😊

[tornioduva]

A rant about spaces in games

As a person who's not in the industry and has never been yet in a development environment, and so has mainly just seen things from a player perspective:

Many, MANY, years ago was understood that if you wanted to give the idea of a big place, a big city, a big valley, a big landscape in general, OF COURSE you wouldn't just make it 1:1 in size and just put it there, it would be a waste of resources, time, effort, all for something that's needed only to convey a sense of scale and nothing else. Instead you would put some 2d images in the distance, an elaborate skybox, maybe some 3d more detailed object and bam, you had a big scenery, though fake. if it was a city, you would just put a wagon with fruit and vegetables, or a car, in front of a road that extends and bam, you have the image of a city that extends beyond the corners of the playable map.

Now more than ever instead there is this toxic obsession with "if the player sees it, then it must be explored, or have an active gameplay purpose", and a general perceived distaste for the concept of creating illusion, while going full simulation.

Now, to clarify: this is not a condemnation of all modern games, this is mainly a thing in AAA and AA games, also i'm not blaming any developers (i don't know how a game is made, how much pressure from above you have, how this might be the only way to keep the boat afloat in terms of sales and marketing), and also i can clearly see that this is not a dead concept; the contrary even! There are a lot of modern (though indie) games that take advantage of limited visibility to convey scale, or complexity, guiding the player imagination but leaving it work by itself. The success of games like Iron lung i think speaks volume about it.

The fact is, even among AAA games i liked and had high hopes for, i can't avoid to be a little sad about how bloated they are with this mentality. The two games that sparked these thoughts are mainly elden ring and tears of the kingdom.

In TotK case, i was sad to see how little they learned from BotW, at least in this regard; instead of closing in on the freedom of the predecessor to give a different, more intense and story driven experience, they doubled down on the original formula and expanded even more. Instead of removing, or readapting, the useless empty space in hyrule, the created even more empty space somehow, and filled it with junk that bloats everything even more. I like this formula, don't get me wrong, just...more often than what i wanted to in both games i found myself on the edge of a cliff, on the backside of a mountain, in a small hole, with nothing there and nothing particularly interesting to see or get, and i thought "why am i here, why am i allowed to be here, why isn't this just background seen from a distance"

In elden ring though i think there is the perfect, more poignant example: Leyndell. The first time i was inside the walls and saw the city, i was awestruck. it was beutiful, intricate, interesting, full of peculiar places. i couldn't wait to explore it all and for once in that game i wasn't overwhelmed with "toomanythingstodotoomanyplacestogo"itis, because i wanted to see it all. i love cities, especially old and ancient ones, love exploring them, lose myself in small streets and alleys. i was genuinelly amazed by the fact that it was completely explorable, and absolutely happy for it. After i've seen it all though, it hit me: ...it's a really small city. like, it's big from a player perspective, there is a lot to do and explore. but it's a pretty small city. I live near Lucca, in Tuscany, so i have a pretty good reference to judge it on, and i think (roughly and without measures, have mercy uhuh) Leyndell and Lucca are nearly the same size, Lucca might be bigger infact uhuh. And even if it's not and Lyndell is bigger, still, after seeing it all it FEELS small. because you've seen it all. Compare Leyndell to Anor Londo instead, and tell me which one of the two FEELS like a gigantic, enormous capital, full of streets, palaces and places for people; and of Anor Londo you only explore like a handful of rooftops uhuh. This might be just a sensation of mine, but the fact the capital of the biggest game Fromsoft has made to date feels smaller than in DS1 where you were dramatically more limited in where you could go....well, that to me is a failure of environment design, at least on an artistic side, in regar to setting up the atmosphere, not in regard to gameplay.

Do i mean with this that open world are always bad, that you should always be limited in where you can go? absolutely not! i love having freedom of exploration, and i like the idea that i can go where i can see! i just wish going forward that developers with the resources to do big projects like these are given the freedom, and the guidance, to guide the players more, to build rails on which our explosive passion of playing can be directed on without letting die out on a rock in the middle of nowhere that you're standing on for no reason. A good example for this i feel is outer wilds! you're free to go where you want, but you are limited by what there actually is to explore, plus the central gimmick. also, all there is to explore is interesting and meaningful, without collectables!

Also, i'm not criticizing empty space at all even. I recently played BABDI, and that is a masterful example of empty, "meaningless" space that is there for a reason, which is the atmosphere of the game. the fact you can explore almost all of the city while there is almost nothing interesting to discover aside from few things, contributes a ton the overall atmosphere.

So, what i'm saying is: developers, go to more theatre plays; not the big budget ones, that can afford all they want, i mean the small local ones, that are able to make you fell like you are in a ballroom with a fancy chair, a stool and a lamp.

[kittycathat]

Shuffle on repeat trend, but not

except its my AURORA only playlist, which is pretty much my on repeat playlist atp

except not tagging people / wasn't tagged because i dont have friends /hj

except im doing more than 10 because its tumblr, i get to ramble

open under cut bc its a long post, lots of images lol

1.

"I know I'm just a girl, but can I change lives?" literally big inspo right here,, i love this song sm

2.

such a catchy song,, but its not a bad thing bc i love it (plays in my head on repeat while running. partially against my will. but its ok)

3.

recently discovered this song is about being queer so i love it even more ahaha also the music video is fire

4.

i like this song but not as much as the others yk? but its still rlly cool and spooky. i have no idea what the lyrics are or waht they mean and want to look them up but also i think its fun to interpret stuff ur own way

5.

recent addition, I don't know this song very well yet tbh. but its rlly pretty <33

6.

i love the live versions of this on yt,, would highly recommend! also have no idea the lyrics/meaning for this one but thats. ok

7.

"Im tired of the rules and your corrections" "if i'm not pure, i guess that i'm too much" "the television lies and now my mind hurts" bro this song has so many lyrics that are just gems

8.

<333 IM AROMANTIC BUT THIS SONG IS GONNA MAKE ME ALLO I SWEAR /j

9.

"are you awake or are you sleeping?" i have listened to this song while falling asleep. so i guess i was both?

10.

"you are the victim, the victim of my love" this song is fire <33 and the music video?? its so cool asjdhflaskd

11.

"it fills my heart up and it breaks me at the very same time" IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL LISTENING TO THIS SONG <333 its so pretty im dying (also its crazy its been 3+ weeks since it came out?? bc like how did time go that fast)

12.

just added this song to my playlist i dont know it well at all tbh

13.

same with this, saw it while watching a concert recording so i just. threw it into my playlist.

14.

"father, dont blame us for trying to live" very cool religious references very very cool song

15.

Pretty good song, a lil bit overused (imo) but thats ok.

16.

"let love conquer your mind" as a person who believes in kindness myself, i love this aaa

17.

<3333 the live recordings of this song are soo pretty! pls go look it up on yt right now akldsjfhal the "cinematic dream" and "simulated dream" lyrics itch my brain so good aa

18.

"And i was running far away, would I run off the world some day?" this song is RIGHTFULLY aurora's most popular song. like come on ofc everyone likes it /gen

19.

has helped me multiple times getting through math class, from being stuck in my head. ily aurora for writing this lol (also the music video <33)

20.

"do you miss the sadness when it's gone?" i used to think this song was ehh but it's grown on me sm lol

anyways tysm for reading my rambling have a good day

[dmagedgoods]

I feel like literally EVERYONE is gonna be asking you about WOTR (if not, consider this The Ask) but if you've already gotten it I'd also like to hear your answers about Kingmaker, at least what you've seen of it so far 👀

Kingmaker

((Oh this will be a beautiful disaster, I'm not far enough in yet, aaa. But alright, let's take a look at how much you all influenced me already. 😂❤️))

Favorite Male Character Tristian. It's all @outeremissary's fault and their amazing analyses'! Also, I'm eying this Varn guy not so respectfully without any true context, because I'm spoilering myself while avoiding spoilers. Does this make any sense? No? 😂

Favorite Female Character OH! This one Eneas actually vaguely knows already. I fell for Jaethal immediately.

Least Favorite Character Will someone punch me if I say Linzi (at this point)? She's probably amazing! What put me off is not her personality or anything but that she made the game seem weirdly inconsistent in its storytelling during the very beginning. She is mad at Eneas and went off with the others but still tells the story as if he was some sort of hero? I think this may actually be the reason I didn't continue yet, I didn't really feel free with my character.

Favorite Ship I don't have the slightest idea yet. 🤔

Favorite Friendship Eneas and Jaethal so far.

Favorite Quote

Worst Character Death (if any) Everyone of importance is still alive at this point in time.

Saddest Moment When Valerie told Eneas to his face and without blinking she despises everything he loves. :') (I'm joking, nothing sad yet. 😂)

Favorite Location Well! I don't have a favorite so far, but the nature is very pretty. I saw a chicken!

[koiyin]

GUYS GUESS WHO'S BACK... 'YAY'

so uh idk why i come back on tumblr every couple months and make posts like this but i've basically ruined my account at this point haha perfectionist issues and i'm going to try to be honest with everyone of you guys because. idek at this point

i don't know how everyone's opinion of me is at this point, and it feels like i'm ruining it. i don't know if this is me now, if i kind of put up a front before, but why these posts seem different than the others on my blog is a mystery to me ^^'

maybe i'm just overthinking it, though?

well, my life is pretty shit. i don't really have any friends, except for a couple close ones who can somehow deal with me-- and, yeah. people at my school don't really like me, and i've fucked up a lot recently. this post sounds really depressing. sorry for that.

i don't know, i guess prior to the whole incident (moots, yk what i'm talking about) i always tried to put up a cheerful front. i had an idealized version of myself, and that was koi. and i did act like myself a lot around you guys, because i became comfortable with all of you and i felt accepted. i'm really grateful for what you all have done for me.

so, more about what's going on- basically, i'm just... not happy with myself, i guess. i wish i had more friends.

you know, my goal in life at one point was to be friends with everyone in my grade. that was more than a year ago. i guess that whole hope pretty much died out. but i do still try my very best, and this is turning into a ramble which i'm sorry for but i just want to get everything off of my chest.

i'll probably never use tumblr regularly again- but, who knows, shit changes.

the incident really affected me. after i was told about everything and learned about all of what happened, i was just... i don't know. i was told that it was that day that i began to eat less, act angrier, and all of that shit- and that went on for a couple weeks.

eventually, i tried to forget about it. i still think about every once in a while, though.

well, i'm starting to sound like a pessimist. i miss when i could be koi, the friendly, cheerful, happy person who had a bunch of friends that worried about him and asked if he was feeling okay.

i don't even know what's going on anymore. i feel fine, and then i go through short spikes of depression. or maybe i'm just a person that's sad all the time, but i choose to be ignorant. i'm really sorry that whoever reads this has to hear me vent and all that shit, but i'm just glad that i can say all of my feelings in the hopes that someone will read this.

so, let's talk about what's been going on since i've left- since i really feel like i should add some filler because of my long absensce '- -

well, i got a suit that kind of reminded me of haruchiyo sanzu from tokyo revengers (haha weeb things) and i look pretty hot in it, ngl- and, my family moved back to our house, which got remodeled. i've done a lot of drawing, too.

and, for context of the tokyo revengers comment earlier- i've been hyperfixating on it for so long. i love the series and the characters aaa

also, i started bakuman and black butler, and they're pretty good! i love the plot of bakuman so much!! (the death note team always makes amazing manga) i also got the first book of haikyuu from the library, because i've seen it referenced online so much and i haven't taken the time to check it out yet.

whew. i don't know, i guess saying all this makes me sound more human than just pixels on a screen. (but i'm actually 3 ducks in a trenchcoat) (i'm not funny)

i've had a lot of homework, so i've been pretty busy.

and i have to go eat dinner now, so i'll be leaving- but again, thank you guys for being my friends for so long. and, why are people still following me when my blog is inactive like- ????

[princkleeatscookies]

personal cookie run headcanons!! :0

My drawing tablet's arriving soon so I guess I'll have to share some of my personal headcanons in cookie run as promised (most of them are clotted cream cookie's,,,, ehehe-)

admittedly, it's a pretty "short" list but I will update this once I thought up with new ones :>c without further ado, let's start those headcanons~! ٩(⊙‿⊙)۶

┌─── ∘°❉°∘ ───┐┌─── ∘°❉°∘ ───┐┌─── ∘°❉°∘ ───┐ ➽─────────❥

- Clotted Cream Cookie owns a stuffed teddy bear/jelly bear as a gift from his mom from childhood / v \ He still holds onto it to this day and doesn't want to admit that he still owns that due to embarrassment ahaha.. He hides it in his room (specifically under one of the pillows in his bed) and pulls it out whenever he was having such a hard time

- Clotted Cream Cookie doesn't know modern slang or anything that Cookies around his age do for fun in the casual. He was raised in a much higher-class so he was only taught proper manners and eloquence. If he was exposed to such stuff, he'll be extremely confused or fascinated and wanted to mimic it himself (basically he's a young boomer lmao, but he is learning~!)

- Clotted Cream Cookie is a bit of a book nerd, as he always reads books (ranging from fantasy books to history books) during his leisure time. He also has his own reading area in his room!

- He never shows it to anyone, but Clotted Cream Cookie is surprisingly vocally talented (in other words, HE CAN SING-). Though he never does sing in front of anyone because he's self-conscious ahaha. He usually sings alone whenever he's in his room or during work aaa,, though Financier Cookie did hear a little bit of it (although it was very faint and didn't believe it was Clotted Cream Cookie at first) (uhuhuhu this is just me inserting the "secretly vocally talented but is too afraid to show it in front of anyone" hc ;v;)

- I'd imagine Clotted Cream Cookie to be around in either in his early 20s or just about to turn 20 (19 years old)

- Clotted Cream Cookie does have a biological father... but let's just say he isn't in the picture anymore, although Clotted Cream Cookie is very much traumatized. not gonna elaborate on that due to how dark it is. (well not yet at least)

ok that's enough Clotted Cream Cookie headcanons for this post HHSDSJDFDK let's continue~!

- Espresso Cookie and Affogato Cookie are related as brothers, but they have long been since separated each other. They don't even know if they know of each other's existence as brothers, but Affogato Cookie does recognizes Espresso Cookie a bit and has a soft spot for him, just a little bit. (I'd like to imagine that only some of the coffee cookies are indeed related to each other. not all but some.)

- Financier Cookie being a big sis to, not just the orphan cookies, but to other cookies as well ehehe (Kouign-Amann Cookie and, to a lesser extent, my cookie run oc for example)

- There were a lot of times where Licorice Cookie kinda regrets being in the Cookies of Darkness All he ever wanted is some sort of validation.. He had no other option after all. He wanted to turn to the good side but Licorice Cookie just believes there's no way for him to be good. I mean, Licorice Cookie isn't all that evil- He's just now trapped on his own decision.

- Cream Puff Cookie sometimes visits the shore to play with Peppermint Cookie during her days in the Parfaedia Institute. Though ever since she became an alumna and busied herself with studying her magic further, alongside protecting the city. She never had time to visit the shore, Which made Peppermint Cookie a little sad.

- I'd like to see that Madeleine Cookie and Financier Cookie are a little bit older than Clotted Cream Cookie (maybe 24 or 25 respectively)

➽─────────❥

【☆】 ★ 【☆】 ╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯ 【☆】 ★ 【☆】 I think that's it for now ahdshasd, I told you this is gonna be a short list, ;v; thank you if you read this far ~! I'll probably think of some stuff but for now, here's the current list this definitely tells that Clotted Cream Cookie is my favorite character lololol

notes:

fun fact, the bit about Clotted Cream Cookie being secretly talented at singing and is reluctant to sing in front of everyone is based on the crk 2nd anniversary stream where his eng va, aaron dismuke (aka miyuki shirogane in kaguya-sama love is war s1-s2 and william james moriarty in moriarty the patriot), was asked to sing in-character but he straight up refuses HAHSHSAHD

the last headcanon was based on the drawing I saw on twitter where young Madeleine Cookie disturbed baby Clotted Cream Cookie. In the drawing, Madeleine Cookie was depicted to be a kid and Clotted Cream Cookie being a baby Which means that Madeleine Cookie is older than Clotted Cream Cookie and I just personally find it both cute and hilarious

The bit where I mentioned my cookie run oc... I might reveal it here on tumblr sometime. But not right now.

once again, thank you guys so much for reading these stupid headcanons of mine ahahsdhsd

[go-to-the-mirror]

headinhands

im not ready for threshold guys! im not! im really not! ive just woken up! oh god, whyyy why must i? it's not fair, it's not fair that i have to do this god damnit.

I'm in shambles and we haven't even started yet.

it's fine. it is fine. alright. lets just. go for it.

hi @a-mag-a-day, threshold time! Mostly rambling, always great words, if I tag it with meta, that means it's GREAT words. You know the drill.

I think it's really cool that this is a continuation/related to a season 1 statement. It really shows how much Jon's changed throughout the years.

He’s just a lonely old man looking for attention and trying to manipulate me into moving back in with him, even though I’ve told him so many times that that’s just not going to happen.

I just feel bad for both of them, both Paul and Marcus. How Paul's actually experiencing this, but Marcus is so... distrustful, for a good reason, that he doesn't believe Paul. That if it just happened a little sooner together then they'd have been able to help each other, but instead all they were able to do was make things worse.

Parallels to Jon and Helen or am I reading too much into it?

And I don’t like being manipulated. I don’t like being lied to.

The Spiral and The Web are pretty similar, you know. What with the whole gaslighting thing of The Spiral, make you doubt yourself, but that's also like manipulation, you know? Can I just gesture to Helen and Jon's whole thing as The Spiral also being a bit of a manipulation fear, because like... yea.

When I was thirteen, it was underneath a railway bridge. It was huge and metal this time, with solid iron bolts sealing it shut and a thick chain stretched across it. The warning stickers had long since peeled off, and someone had scrawled in chalk: ‘Warning: Danger of death.’ As I passed, something heavy began to bang on the other side, sending the chain dancing. It pounded again and again, and I didn’t know if it was trying to force its way out, or politely knocking, hoping to be let in.

Aaaa! Spooky! This statement is, yeah, it's scary, and really cool. I just nhhnhrnnh 10/10! it's so snazzy! This episode as a whole, mate, it's just great.

I was trying so hard to walk carefully, to seem like I wasn’t drunk, that I almost didn’t notice it until it was too late.

My drama teacher says that to act drunk you need to act like you aren't drunk. Like, act like you're acting like you're not drunk. You get it? I've never needed to act like I'm drunk so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

He just wants me to move back in with him, and I can’t. I just can’t. Sometimes, you just have to leave, even if what’s on the other side scares you.

A mic-drop ending again, yay! God, the way the statements end are always so cool, this is one of the most cool ones.

I never thought I’d miss those days, when I could throw out some half-baked speculation about drug abuse or mental illness and, woosh, away all the statements went.

I'm fine okay, it's fucking fine. It's so fine, I'm so fine, like so fucking fine, so much fineness in me. It's like! For Paul MacKensie, he can say that, he can say there's too much that doesn't add up, and that he wants to believe it but can't, he can fucking say that.

But he can't say that about this, he's mag 41 too deep. PODDED CAST!

AAA

But no, almost every one of those statements, those people … That poor old man. Like I can talk. Like I’m in any position to mourn the suffering of the innocent.

So, I was looking through old dms to find my reactions to threshold, and I found something, not on a first listen but here it is:

Last night I was thinking about Jon's line in threshold "Like I can talk. Like I'm in any position to mourn the suffering of the innocent," and literally crying. And thinking about how yk none of the avatars see themselves as undeserving of what they got, right, none of them. And I'm sad about that. It is not only the innocent that suffer. I have so many feelings about Mike Crew now you don't even know girls when girls when (gender neutral) they have a years long villain arc and at the end of it they can't recognize their former self This is about Jon and Mike Crew and Helen and Jude Perry and Hh

(messages to mapleejay (follow it) on the 28th December, 2022)

But there is one thing I know an awful lot better now than I did when I read his father’s statement. I know an awful lot more about doors.

FUCK DUDE YOU SURE DO!

I love him so much.

HELEN You rang? ARCHIVIST Marcus MacKenzie. Why didn’t you tell me? HELEN Is that name supposed to mean something to me? ARCHIVIST No, I suppose it wouldn’t, would it? Just an old man and his son for you to terrorise and feast on.

AAAAAAA JSWDAESDAFIJA THIS THIS ALRIGHT LIKE-

Okay, Jon's fucked up, he has fucked up, but he remembers their names, right? He remembers them. Jess Tirrell. Floyd Matharu. The others that we don't know the names of. Absolutely not proportional, Jon why the fuck did you do that, but like, hey, at least they're still people to him.

Also... "why didn't you tell me?" This implies they've been talking enough for Helen to have told him, which does make sense, actually. I have headcanons post-131. Well, post-132, when Jon's not throwing himself in a coffin, you know?

HELEN Ah, well, the son I was pursuing long before I was even Michael. And technically, I didn’t eat the old man. He passed away from terror before I even got a chance to open properly. ARCHIVIST And his son? Marcus? He was fine when I found his father’s statement two years ago, but now, suddenly, I can’t get through to him. HELEN No, I imagine not. I decided it was time to finish that game a few months ago. ARCHIVIST You… Why?

He sounds so bloody frantic, and just... oh my god just the way he's speaking, frantic and horrified, should he have known that this is what he'd get when he befriended monsters.

Aaaaa threshold <333

HELEN Not sure. I suppose Helen didn’t have quite the same attachment to him as a project. I’m not quite as much for decades-long campaigns of subtle terror these days. ARCHIVIST That’s horrible. HELEN Is it? We do what we need to do when it comes to feeding, don’t we? … Don’t we, Archivist? ARCHIVIST (Softly) Yes.

SCRATCHING AT THE WALLS HNNHHNRNHR

OH MY GODD I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAYYY IM JUST- AAAAAA SCREAMING CRYING SHAKING JON LIKE A CAT!

I had good words a while ago, again to @mapleejay

ME: To be fair the entire fandom's jon loosing their mind episodes are like the same (A Guest For Mr. Spider, Scrutiny, Can't even type scrutiny Uh the eye opens MAPLEEJAY: true ME: Feel like we as a society should be more obsessed with helen and jon MAPLEEJAY: relistening to the coming storm Again TRUEEE ME: And also whatever the hell eye contact was NO ONE TALKS ABOUT EITHER OF THEM AND HERE I AM ROTATING THEM IN MY BRAIN MAPLEEJAY: punching them beating them up /pos ME: Diversity loss! The distortion is a tory MAPLEEJAY: HAGAGDHQHD ME: But like also jokes aside oh my god them. Like hhhh - the new door where jon saw himself in helen and then helen IMMEDIATELY died - another twist where jon was about to die just like helen did and helen saved him (i actually never fucking saw- JUST LIKE HELEN DID [transcribers note: probably is drawing parallels between Jon almost dying to Michael, and Helen actually dying, and Helen being able to save Jon]) - taking stock where helen asks jon for help when SHE takes someone - threshold where JON goes to HELEN and HELEN (fuck why are they so similar) JON GOES TO HELEN BECAUSE SHE KILLED SOMEONE AND HELEN THROWS HIS VICTIMS BACK IN HIS FACE - a gravedigger's envy where theyRE BLOODY HHHHH WHY NO OK BECAUSE THE HELEN JON DAISY TRIO REFLECT OFF EACH OTHER AND I HATE THEM >:( - checking out WHICH IS IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE EPISODE WHERE MARTIN TALKS TO HIMSELF MIND AND IS LITERALLY THE MOST HONEST WE SEE HIM IN THE WHOLE SEASON LIKE NOT THAT HES LYING TO MARTIN BUT THAT HE'S NOT TRYING WITH HELEN *shaking them vigorously* fucking die

(10th January, 2023)

they. fuck them. god damnit, them <3

HELEN It would be better if you embraced it.

(MAG 146 - Threshold)

HELEN Oh Jon! This existence can be wonderful, if you just let it. ARCHIVIST (Sadly) I know.

(MAG 187 - Checking Out)

MARTIN Huh. She couldn’t help what she was, I guess. ARCHIVIST She didn’t even try.

(MAG 188 - Centre of Attention)

Jon and Helen ✨ feelings ✨

I have highlighted those specific lines together so much, like... they just fit. Throwing them at a wall.

ARCHIVIST Were you controlled? HELEN What a delightful thought. I don’t believe so, no, but the Spider’s strings are subtle, so I suppose it’s not impossible. Why? ARCHIVIST I want to know. Can The Web control another avatar, one that serves a different power? Make them do things they don’t want to. Make them find victims, feed. (Helen laughs.) HELEN Perhaps. Perhaps not. Would that make life easier for you? Are you so sure you didn’t want to? (Helen laughs again.)

[ID: CC!GoodTimesWithScar with his head in his hands. /End ID]

ARCHIVIST Been a while since you’ve all come to see me together. I assume it’s not good news.

It starts with him being all... sarcastic and stuff, and then he's like Oh Shit. Oh Fuck. Oh No.

ARCHIVIST And what exactly is on this t— Oh.

OH BOY! OH GOODIE!

oh boy...

oh boy...

BASIRA How many? ARCHIVIST Basira, I— BASIRA How many? ARCHIVIST Four. MELANIE Jesus. BASIRA Including the one on the boat? DAISY What one on the boat? ARCHIVIST Including Floyd, five. MELANIE Jesus.

Firstly, like great voice acting, all of them, all of them. Yeah... I'm not going to say the secondly :D

ARCHIVIST Jess Tirrell, the woman on the tape, she was the fourth. I’d just tried to… I was weak, ravenous. I didn’t feel… The first was a supermarket cleaner, ended up lost for a weak in an endless warehouse. I didn’t even… I just went in for some shopping and he was there and I just… asked. The second was… It was after I got stabbed by Melanie. MELANIE You are not putting this on me. ARCHIVIST No, that’s not what I meant. I was walking the streets; I thought I was trying to clear my head. DAISY But you were hunting. ARCHIVIST Apparently. And I found a woman who, every year on her birthday, wakes up in a fresh grave, just for her. DAISY And the third was after the coffin. ARCHIVIST A man rejected by all who knew him, searching ever darker places for love. When he told me his story, he started weeping maggots. BASIRA Enough. ARCHIVIST I hope so.

IM USUALLY PRETTY GOOD AT WORDING MY THOUGHTS OKAY JUST-

You know what, take a gander through annabelle--cane's tumblr, it has good words. I just sort of went through his tma tag for a while ajsjdjhfs.

BASIRA You’re a danger, Jon, a monster. You’re hurting innocent people. ARCHIVIST So did Daisy. BASIRA Shut up! It’s not the same thing at all!

Like, Basira what the fuck, she's just... she's all like oh wow daisy's better for resisting, meanwhile trying to get daisy to hunt again, enabling her when she did, making all these excuses for as to why daisy's actually better and what she did wasn't wrong and awful.

Yes, I get that that's the whole point of Daisy and Basira as characters.

BASIRA I’ll tell you all what I find. Don’t let him eat anyone’s brain while I’m gone. ARCHIVIST That’s not what I do.

HE SOUNDS LIKE HES SULKING, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

I don't have a conclusion. Shaking Jon and Helen I love them so much. I still need a jon and helen tag. Threshold (starts fucking crying)

[quiznak-ofgrayskull]

Chan's Home for Troubled Kids! LET'S GO!

Okay so first, Chan. Chan is an ex-military man now Forensics Professor at a university in Bangkok. He had a wife who died during childbirth, he lost them both. He ends up quite literally running into Arm on the streets. He ends up taking Arm in as his first kid. Arm was seven. Arm is seven when Chan took him in. Arm is pretty much non-verbal and speaks through sign language or a whiteboard. He doesn't like to talk, but he starts to break out of his shell and starts talking when he meets Tankhun and Pol. When Porsche and Chay join the family, Arm is 15.

Pete is the next kid Chan picks up. Pete is a troubled kid whose grandmother called Chan asking for a favor. She asked Chan to watch and care for Pete when she couldn't. Pete's grandma and Chan were old friends from his military days. Pete's mother died and his father went missing mysteriously. (Pete killed him but was never caught or found out.) Pete was eight when he was adopted and is 16 when Porsche arrives.

Big in true middle child fashion, is the third kid to be picked up by Chan. Big has a lot of anxiety as his mother was a drug addict. He was put into the system by a neighbor who called CPS on his mother. Chan found him after Pete started talking to him. Big was brought home. Big is eight when adopted and is 16 when Porsche is adopted.

Pol is the fourth child to be adopted by Chan. Pol is depressed and his depression has caused problems with him being adopted. His family was killed in two tragic accidents, a car crash and their family bakery catching fire. Pol and Big were at the same orphanage so when Big gets adopted, Pol feels sad because he is losing his friend. That is, until Chan adopts Pol as well because Arm saw that he was sad and wanted to help him. Pol is nine when adopted and 17 when Porsche shows up.

Ken is the fifth child adopted by Chan before the eight year timeskip to Porsche. He was abandoned by his parents, so he had to take care of his younger twin siblings. They were brought to an orphanage and Ken's siblings were adopted but he was rejected by the family because he was too old and too angry. With abandonment and anger issues, Ken wasn't adopted until he was nine years old. Chan found him sitting alone while everyone was playing and offered to adopt Ken who looked at him and said in the tiniest voice "you want me?" Ken is 17 when Porsche shows up.

Porsche is 15 when adopted by Chan per Yok's request. Arthee gave up Porsche and Chay to the system because he didn't care. Porsche has a record of running away from his foster families because he refuses to be separated from Chay. When Porsche is adopted, Chay is adopted by someone else but Chat acts up and is sent back and Chan scoops him up, promising Yok she can visit them whenever. Chay is ten years old when adopted by Chan.

Aaa this is awesome??? I love this??? They???

The shenanigans potential they have as siblings is so. I just feel like hi-jinks would be involved. Big being the middle child feels so accurate to me actually. I don't know what it is but yeah. Tracks.

I feel like they'd have bunk beds lol

I feel like every time he brought back a new kid Chan is just like "Okay last one for real this time" and that statement has yet to be true. Possibly will never be.

Curious what Ken's relationship with his siblings was before they got adopted :0

This is so cool I love this!! I am a sucker for sibling-like relationships and this has that and I'm just lkjadsl;as I love them

[hermitcraftkinfessions]

large ass queerplatonic polycule and yall got children?? damn, livin ur best life, arent ya!

yet another confession from good ol perlo, empires this time...

The Wither Rose Alliance was actually Wither Rose Cousins (just countin Gem, fWhip, Sausage and me self, actually in my canon that *was* our alliance, Scott, Kath, Shrub and Joey had another one, and i swear its like that in the canon too?? but cant find nor remember their name..)

Like not the name- just silly pun bc they were my cousins :} yeah!! Gem and fWhip were twins, Sausage was their younger brother, and I was their cousin (younger than the twins, older than sausage). We grew up together since well. my "creator" just decided to left me at sum mortal family's porch ig.. so they took me in and i grew up as their cousin!! Sadly while very accepted by them and their parents, I never got the child or sibling title... I was the niece and cousin! And it was okay by me! A bit sad but hey, I had a neat family! :) I did gain a father figure of sorts when I met Pix tho! Pixlriffs (cooooincidentally one of my online dad's kintypes...).. yeah I took him as a father figure pretty quickly, and he returned the affection ! Which- made it harder when there was conflicts between Pixandria and the Mythlands.. but oh well..

SORRY FOR THE BIG ASS MEMORY DUMP AAA- anyways i probably will send more in another ask if thats okay.. peeks like a cat

-🌙Pearlie (He/She)

Huh! interesting. I'd say more but i never did watch empires...i should probably do that, but anyway! sometimes family just, works like that? i don't know all i got is my older sibling (mod wels!)...i think the king we served was an adoptive parent of sorts to us? er...more so to wels, ill probably make a mod kinfession explaining all that actually... as for the ask thing you can send as many as you want! we don't really have a limit on how many can be sent at a time

-Mod hels

[cloudd-nyne]

6, 20, and 25 for the ask game if you wouldn’t mind

Aaa smol ty!!♡

25. Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing?

Oh god absolutely. "Say so" was actually written very slowly overtime in a discord dm! Purely bc i would get very sad while working on it :') I've gotten myself with feels a few times but that one in particular was rough on me

I usually stick to writing fluff and/or smut bc i do not handle angst very well jejfkek i actually once got sent home early from work bc i read a sad angst fic on my break and couldn't stop sobbing (rip to my old manager she probably thought someone had died or something OWNFJWKDJ)

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written?

I really loved "Fish out of water" i thought i was pretty clever with it kwkdkekfke

However my favorite fic title is for one not posted yet, but its called "Hold Your Breathe (And Count the Days)" and if you understand that reference, i love you KEKFKEKF

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

SOBS oh god okay i could say SO many, but i don't wanna flood this ask with a massive list (but if anyones interested in a fic rec list from me plz!!!! I am blessed to have so many amazing friends that are fantastic writers and id love to shout them all out)

But off the top of head! I have reread the tanzen fic "An Almost Perfect Lie" by butterfree?? I want to say? Like a million times. Thats actually the fic that made me cry so hard i got sent home OWKCKWKFKDK but legit its a beautiful fic especially if you like angst with a happy ending!!

[darethshirl]

For the WIP game - 1, 3, and 4 👀

aaa thank you for the ask! 🥰

bloodweave >:)

honestly!! pretty self-explanatory! 😌 its a bloodweave smutty oneshot but NAUGHTY cause I'm basing it on my Astarion Origin Evil Playthrough >:)

I'm actually super excited about this!!! 👀👀 literally cant wait to finish this and post it im chomping at the bit akjsdh. im only gonna tease the start of it tho 👀

Goblins were disgusting, wretched little creatures, but even Astarion had to admit they knew how to throw a party. Booze, blood, and a charming inclination to cheer for him when he walked by; truly, what more could a recently-freed spawn want? Astarion had been witness to much worse engagements than this. His night was claimed by Minthara, whatever that meant—oh, he knew perfectly well what that meant, Astarion thought with a sneer and an eyeroll—but that was a problem for later. He could still enjoy himself in the meantime, for what passed as enjoyment in these circumstances. The goblins at least seemed happy.

3. plague :(

OKAY SO 😂 last week i got obsessed with Plague Tale: Requiem and binge played and finished it and IM STILL REELING 😭😭 FROM THE EMOTIONS 😭😭 so i had to exorcise them with a post-game fic where i explore Grief and Depression :( the sad smiley is cause theres a lot of ANGST :( :( :(

(also to anyone who hasnt played the Plague Tale games PLEASE give them a try if you enjoy games that actually take their narrative seriously, have good characters, and also take your heart and squeeze it into a bloody pulp of emotion)

4. zuko???

OKAY i probably shouldnt have added that to the list cause its teeechnically for an exchange, maybe. I was looking through the Candy Hearts exchange in case I wanted to write a treat, and some of the atla prompts caught my eye so I sat down and wrote 1k words in one flurry of inspiration

...except then my strength abandoned me and i realised i wrote 1k words and i hadnt even gotten to the Main Scene of the fic yet 🙃 so I honestly dont know if I'll ever finish this?? Candy Hearts is supposed to be a low stakes exchange so maybe eventually I'll turn off my inner perfectionism and churn out the rest, but I'm no longer feeling super excited about this. we'll see!

[wip title game]

[katharpy]

The animatic(?) with the Bluey audio (I think with Oli and Reilly) is killing me, I know nothing about them and I want them to be happy but it feels so sad 😭 are they ok? Is their story finished? Is there any chance for a happy reunion?

oh god ok let me. go off for a second shes kinda on my mind 24/7 rn!!!

so Oli is currently my character for a dual solo game we're nicknaming the "timeline game" my friend is running for us. it's been really fun for me so i've also maybe been turning it into a visual novel on the side?? we do a some text rp in between actual sessions and ive been transcribing both for a vn

(lore dump below this aaa)

Oli basically is a tiefling orc who was raised by her grandmother (Loralee) and was given up by her parents/shunned by her peers and was trained by her grandmother instead growing up being a normal kid and stuff. She had never had friends before. But her grandmother taught her the countries morals, which are basically being kind and patient! Which is very funny when you have a very scary resting bitch face like hers.

When she finally joined the military, wanting to become a paladin for her kingdom, she met Riley! Her first friend. (and first crush, but she hasn't realized she was in love with her yet) Riley liked flowers, so she's ended up with a habit of collecting flowers and pressing them in a book she keeps with her. Forget Me Not's were Riley's favorite.

Sadly, when she was given the chance to lead her first mission, something simple like some monster extermination mission, she failed and got Riley (and possibly others) killed. Oli blamed herself, quitting her military service.

Here's where the game comes in though! Oli is technically also an npc in my campaign. As a general. She's not supposed to quit the military, she's supposed to persevere and become a really important paladin. In our timeline game, the characters my and friend are playing are versions of these characters from timelines where they are considered "anomalies" and are snatched from those defunct timelines and are basically indentured servants for a company that's main goal is "preserving the main timeline". Each session we go on little missions and deal with anomalies which generally harken back to characters and stories we're familiar with, the first session being where i had to see a version of one of my own characters (Azalea) who had completely given up on life because of one small difference. With the idea of timelines and stuff she technically could reuinte with Riley somehow? i would not put that past my dm lol

now she's partnered with an agent to take care of her, a sweet pink haired girl named kim who has a similar past as hers that is very much a slow burn romance. Oli rn is lvl 1, so she WILL be a paladin technically! Just not of the Crown subclass like she intended. She'll be the Ancients subclass, but it will be her tiefling bloodline, which is a big thing she's pretty ashamed about after her parents disowning her at birth and stuff! so she's gonna have this character arc of getting over grief and shame and learning to make friends and fall in love and its going to be very very fun and i cant wait to make it into a game for everyone to read both Oli's AND Tithe's story!! (also she has a 20 in str at lvl 1 shes so big and strong)

OK THAT WAS A LOT THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TEDTALK!!!