#its a real shame but with this move they kinda deserve it

[thepartyishere]

screaming into the void about this and shoot me if I end up being wrong but Steven Lim getting so much hate for the Watcher news dosen't sit right with me. watcher has 25 employees, he's surely not wholly to blame and being dogpiled by the internet must suck. this is a decision they all made as a company

dont get me wrong watcher is making a horrible mistake to move and paywall their content but it feels wrong for everyone to be saying such mean stuff soley about steven lim

[sparrowlovesskittles]

Thunder review time I guess??

I'm gonna be real I don't have much to say about Sunbeam or Nightheart this is gonna be 90% rambling about Frostpaw

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

Sunbeam

- I like her trials, especially the one about training the kittens hehehe.

- I like her bonding with Nightheart's family and learning to find a place in ThunderClan even when he isn't there!! I think it's a really important aspect of switching clans actually. The cats should be able to be comfortable and happy with their clan even without their mate by their side.

- She really gets some good girlboss moments in!!!!!!! You GO Sunbeam yell at Cherryfall!! Publicly shame Berryheart several times in a row!!!!!!!!

- God is it just me or does she have SO much chemistry with Myrtlebloom

Nightheart

- Him and Frostpaw bonding is quite sweet :)

- Love him nearly drowning in a covered pool and it sounding all scary and dramatic and then we switch to Frostpaw's perspective and she's just like 'that idiot nearly drowned in a tiny little pond the other day ugh 🙄🙄'

- Literally WHY did he just run away without telling anyone at all that's so funny and why does NO ONE even bat an eye LMAO?? Poor Sunbeam

-Idk man he's just kinda there

FROSTPAW

- GIRLIE!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! POOR BABY!!!

- Shoutout to Frostpaw the first warrior cat to be canonically spayed!!!! That's so funny I love how Smokey is just like 'yeah that happens lmao' and her and Whistlepaw are just like 'huh. okay then'. Anyway from now on I'm drawing her with a nicked ear like they do to cats in TNR programs

- Speaking of Whistlepaw. THEY'RE SO SWEET! AND GAY!!!

- Girlie is a mess she's so traumatized literally just nearly got murdered and she fucking SNAPS at StarClan when they refuse to tell her shit. AS SHE SHOULD!! SHE DESERVES TO!!!! RIVERSTAR IS FUCKED UP FOR DOING THIS TO HER, ACTUALLY.

- OTTERS!!!!!!!! About time they got mentioned again, the last time was like literally TNP I think. It was implied otters lived at the lake but now Frostpaw confirms they don't anymore (but the elders definitely know about them). When are we getting the Minnowtail's Genocide novella where she plans the mission to drive the otters out of the lake and then marries Mousewhisker huh warrior cats??????

- Why was Frostpaw more traumatized by climbing a tree than she was by literally being chased by a dog. DGMW it's a good scene, I'm INCREDIBLY glad her PTSD was mentioned in the first place, but I feel like it's kinda weird for her to struggle with the tree when one day earlier she encountered a dog and just sort of... hissed at it a bit and then moved on.

- The park cats have canonically survived for longer than the clans and I am so sorry but that's BS. You're telling me no one in the past like 100 years killed these cats or TNRed them??? How many parks have they been through at this point??

- Frostpaw learning to meditate is so good though actually. Especially when she realises how fucked up the clan system is. If she doesn't fuck up Splashtail and then fuck up StarClan and fix the entire clan system in the next two books I'm gonna riot.

- I adore that she's FAR more distraught about Curlfeather being evil than she is about Splashtail. Like yeah! That's her mother!! That would fuck her up, Actually!! It's refreshing for a character to have familial relationships that are more important than their romantic ones.

- Frostpaw also feels like such a genuinely realistic victim. When she admits that she feels like it was her fault Splashtail was able to manipulate her because she was so naive? And then the park cats all cuddle her and tell her that it wasn't her fault and that HE'S the fucked up one? That scene actually made me cry a bit ngl.

- Hehe Frostpaw meditates now she's a true hippy stoner.

General

- WHY DID THEY PULL A RISING STORM ON US. FROSTPAW JUST STAND UP AND SHOUT AT EVERYONE. ITS NOT TOO LATE. ARGHGDHDHDJDHSJDJHS (I understand she's going through a lot and is very panicked but come ON)

- I like the more personal vibe of this book- the conflict is largely internal, with her realising in her own time that Splashtail was evil. It's not the big dramatic scene I was hoping for- but at the same time it's kind of... Nice? I think it's cool. And I'm sure there will be more drama left to come!

- My prediction for the next two books is that she gets rid of Splashtail and then spends the remainder of the arc yelling at StarClan and fixing the clans. Ideally then I think we should have a soft reboot and jump forward in time, the clans are all operating under new rules, none of the cats are the same, etc. But that's not terribly likely to happen.

- YEAH DOVEWING YOU YELL AT IVYPOOL!! Ivypool deserves it honestly. Dovewing took none of her shit and that's beautiful.

- SQUIRRELSTAR!!!! I wasn't initially too jazzed about this, and I still have my grievances, but I think this is the right time for her to become leader. Go girl give us conflict!! Give us drama!!!!!!!!

- Riverstar is a dick lol??????

[she-had-many-names]

*The hug between Icia and the main party lasts a long, long time.*

*She's still quietly crying by the end of it, her shame and embarrassment pushed aside by a different feeling.... acceptance. Love. Comfort. Hope.*

*There's another gentle sound that mixes with the faltering wind, almost like tiny glass bells ringing in an empty hall. Looking at Icia's face, the cracks.... they start to retreat. The spikes of ice breaking through her skin retract, leaving small scars that're bound to fade with time. The cracks ebb away from her face, taking away the crude, deformed, crack of a mouth they once formed. The cracks that had just lined her skin are now gone, and they will remain gone for a long, long time.*

*Finally, the crying finally stops.*

*Icia wipes the final tear from her eye, and it soaks into her sleeve cuff. Its all over.... and truly, she feels so, so, so much better. She can't remember the last time she felt so relieved, the last time her mind was this sharp, the last time she felt so calm and collected and ready for anything.... it had been so long since she felt any of that.*

*The hug is warm. Icia works one hand into Lance's and interlocks their fingers... she squeezes gently. 3 times, she squeezes before letting go... and standing up.*

*Everyone backs up slightly as Icia stands, looking at each other in confusion and bewilderment. She seems a little uneasy on her feet, but slowly walks towards where the Queen's body lies.*

*Real Icia kneels down and looks into her evil counterpart's lifeless, gray, completely non-reflective eyes.... a dismal grief fills her mind. But not the kind that makes her panic.... just a grief of this person who once was her. She lost everything, and therefore lost herself.*

*Icia moves the Queen's body so she lays flat on her back, straight and still like how someone in a casket would like. She takes the broken locket that hung around the Queen's neck and folds it within her hands before standing. She bows deeply, a few melancholy tears filling her eyes and dropping, making tiny clink sounds as they hit the marble floor. She says a tiny prayer out of respect.*

.... may you rest easy, for the pain you endured was not deserved. Be reunited with your loved ones, and find comfort in who you now are. Remember what Ramiro said.

*Real Icia kneels, using her hand to close the eyes of the dead Queen. She stares at the body for a moment... before standing and walking back to everyone.*

*One by one, she gives them all a very, very large and long hug. It's.... not as cold as usual. Not exactly warm but... perhaps the temperature of a gentle breeze, rather than a snowy night as usual.*

*Northa.... Easton.... Sun.... RT Anon.... even Stitch get a large, long hug despite the fact he slapped her and kinda invalidated her completely but we're just gonna ignore that....*

*And then finally Lance. Icia once again holds his hands, squeezing 3 times before reaching up with one hand and cupping his cheek. There's a little frost covering a portion of his skin, from his disregard of his safety in her frozen crisis... but nothing a few wipes of her thumb couldn't fix.*

*She leans up, kissing him lightly and slowly. She whispered to him quietly.* God, I love you so much.... *And then pulled away.* [no one comment on how cringe that was, it was cute]

*Icia's eyes fall on everyone, her eye full of gratitude. She looks... relieved. So, so, so incredibly relieved.*

... all of you- thank you for.... all of that. I can't express it enough... it was a terrifying experience. I'm so incredibly sorry I almost hurt you all. But.... truly, thank you for staying and... being here and helping me calm down. I feel indebted to all of you. *She bows deeply.*

All is right in the world, at least for the moment. Elsie is sobbing /pos.

Shattered Heart Locket added to inventory!

….Wait, weren’t they here to find someone?

[000recover]

12.31.23

today, i came to a realization (i do that a lot, these days!) about where some of my problems have been coming from.

so much of the shit i've gone through, from when i was really young to now, especially the things that have formed so much of the kind of person i am now, have been around my choice being taken away-- i've been left in a lot of places where my autonomy has been stripped or violated. and that's a scary thing! that's a terrifying thing, and it's also a thing that's happened enough times that i started letting myself believe that i didn't have a choice in anything happening to me anymore. everything became the fault of something else-- i couldn't help that i have a fucked up body, blame my parents. i can't help the fact that i react like this, blame my father figures, blah blah. i could go on for a while with how embedded in me this idea has become. i think it was part of how i justified still being affected by my trauma -- the idea that irreversible damage had been done to me that i could never come back from. and technically on a scientific level, that probably is true. i have a lot of the diagnoses and problems i do because of how severely it affected my brain and how i process stress.

my cool hippie therapy friend i met last year and i did a lot of work together on the idea of recognizing other people as human and therefore inherently deserving of love; and the one person i couldn't ever really find it in myself to apply it to was my father. which, in my defense, would be a really really hard thing; he did hurt me really profoundly as a very young person, and that creates so much deep hurt. and i knew he was a person-- but he'd caused so much harm to myself and the rest of my family, i considered him irredeemable.

i think another thing i really struggle with still is the idea that people are not their actions, and people can change if their actions do. maybe its because so many things happened when i was so young that i've developed this really one-sided, black and white picture of people. and yea, some things are kind of unforgiveable actions, including a lot of stuff i've gone through both as a child and as an adult. part of understanding who i am as a person is probably going to be figuring out what i feel comfortable forgiving, and what i don't. my father has said for a while that he's sober now and i haven't believed him once, i think partially because i understand now too how much addiction really fucks with what's okay to lie about. but knowing that he's a person, and i'm technically a person too, then that same logic i apply to him and other people i've hurt applies to me too, right?

maybe that's part of what scares me so much about being in trouble. if i've fucked up, if i've hurt someone, if i've caused damage, then that's totally permanent. why should i move on from that? that's who i am as a person, now. and i think this year especially, the stress and the shame and the hurt really started to get to me, and between everything going on in my own life, and being hurt by my ex cheating on me, and the things i might have done to contribute to that situation, i just stopped being willing to face it. i hid from the shame in substances and if i made another mistake, i'd just start drinking again. i'd apologize with my body, because all it's ever been to me is a tool, and then i'd get triggered and hate myself even more, and act out again or just skip straight to drinking over it. i justified hurting with more hurt. and yea, it kinda sucks of a lot of people to accept that apology, but that's not a reason for me to keep doing it over and over again.

so what's my solution, then? well, one step is being willing to actually be accountable for some of the dumb shit i've been up to, i guess, but that's hard when it still feels like me fucking up is death penalty worthy. so i guess the real first step, now that i've figured out where and what the wound is, is to stitch it up. therapy time! unpacking more of my irrational core beliefs! challenging them! understanding where and what my real values lie! and, as previously stated, probably figuring out which hurt in my life i'm ready to forgive and which i need to just acknowledge and move on from. maybe get some closure here and there. which, some of the deep hurt that still comes out is probably going to take a lot longer. i probably won't ever be totally done, especially with how wedged some of my illnesses have become in my brain folds. but that's part of life, i guess.

also with that is going to be accepting that some relationships can't or won't be repaired. which is tough, and has to come from me on some levels, too. that's going to be another thing to figure out. and with that is gonna be accountability too. and here's the real kicker; after that, i get to choose to be different. i kept thinking for so long that if i was really healed, i'd just be able to start doing things. i forget how long it takes to form or kick a habit, but it's probably a lot longer than i've been letting my impatient self have.

yea, i did get pretty shitty again for a while. i've been stuck in a bit of a loop the last few months especially, and this whole year has been rough on the progress i've made. i did a lot of things that remind me of stuff other addicts in my family have done. a lot of it was in response to hurt, but that doesn't justify what i've done. i've become so wrapped up in the person that people hurt that i haven't done any growing from it. i can be sorry for what i've done, but i won't change until i'm willing to move on from it. which means letting other people move on, too (is this what my friend meant by the difference between pain and suffering?)

i think maybe then i can start to have the life i've really wanted. i have a lot of ideas of where this is going to take me. but, more importantly, it's the new year! the best time to set real, tangible goals! so i'm going to make myself a list of resolutions and keep them here, somewhere really visible, for accountability. my friend is coming over tonight so i doubt i'll post again until tomorrow at the earliest. happy new year!

[just-antithings]

Do I prefer media with male main characters, to the point I will actively reject media with female protagonists, because I am affected my society's misogyny and am unable to connect to non-male characters?

Or do I prefer media with pretty twinks because I am trans, but can't express my full gender identity for fear of not getting work, and media is currently the only way to safely experience the male part of my gender?

Or is it just that pretty twinkish men make my brain purr and give me the butterflies and it's not that deep?

The point is that I don't think it matters. I can want and support more women in media without necessarily experiencing it myself, and the assumption that I must be misogynistic or "an evil fujoshi" for preferring male characters is way too black and white.

It's complicated and it's not. It's good to have more diversity in media and it is okay to still prefer specific character types.

So antis, please stop wasting your time trying to shame me for not liking your favorite girl character better. Your posts only make me less interested. In fact I now stan my pretty boys more.

Sincerely someone who will now write more pretty boy fics to feel gender envy about 💖

I feel, a lot of WLW media has been coming out lately, which super congrats to my girls out there you deserve it. But as far as gender goes the only thing I am 100% sure about is that I am not a girl. So I also have a real difficulty time throwing myself in to wlw spaces, and especially wlw fandom spaces. That being said most of the time I will think a character is a wlw but I kinda just go "she likes girls" and move on with it but I get invested in "het" or MLM ships because it easier to get into something when I can vibe with the characters. Different strokes for different folks. No one should be forced to like things that they don't. Stop shaming people who don't like what you like its wack. Live your funky little life anon do your thing without shame.

[the-orangeauthor]

Hi Ammol!

Since you've mentioned loving Grey's anatomy I wanted to ask you about something.

What do you think ot Cristina and Owen as a couple?

Personally I'm hating them together, especially since Owen isn't trying to see Cristina for who she is ( not wanting kids or not wanting to be a mother).

Seeing Cristina telling him all that and him reacting by saying "You might change ur opinion" is such a jerk move. Its one of the tropes I hate most cuz it invalidates aro and ace ppl esp when said ppl don't want kids.

(Its a personal headcanon of mine that Cristina is on the aromantic spectrum).

Ngl I've never seen the appeal of Hunt as a character.

Hi!!!

Ooo you want me to talk about Owen??? You’ve unlocked a rant.

Owen had the potential to be a great character - obscure, military background, a little badass in his initial debut to the show, the slightly dismissive attitude was kinda enticing at first but boy did it go downhill real quick.

I can’t fault him on his ptsd related issues because he was in a war after all and mental health is a thing we care about, but the rest of his ideals and treatment of Christina??? No. She deserves better than Owen.

Christina has already been through the spiel with Burke. Big macho man who falls in love with a dominant woman but then expect her to change. It’s ridiculous!! I also see Christina as being aro/ace or at least someone who needs to form deep connections before falling in love / becoming romantically involved, and it’s such a shame that she was robbed of that as soon as she starts to get comfortable.

She loved Burke through his hand troubles and Owen through his PTSD but they both want her / expect her to change and it’s so unfair. I don’t know far you are into their relationship but boy does it get worse and you will absolutely want to destroy Owen and you are 10000% valid for it.

I do wish they had gone in the original sexy charismatic version I thought we were gonna get, just for the sake of seeing Christina actually be accepted by someone who wasnt waiting for her to give in to her ‘natural biological urges’ and was willing to give her unconditional love as a career driven, self loving, independent and child free woman who still loved so so deeply. She is literally such a caring person, you can see it in her love for Meredith, the way she interacts with the others, she may be a hard ass on the surface but Christina Yang is capable of true love and I will live and die by the fact that her and Meredith are soulmates and Meredith is probably the only one who will ever truly accept Christina as she is.

So yeah - Owen Hunt, I hate him too and this is a Hunt hating friendly space. I also believe that if they let him keep his Scottish accent it would have made his character more likeable because why not!!

Feel free to let me know how far you are in the show so I don’t give spoilers and I will happily rant some more - for instance, have you met Teddy Altman yet?? There’s so much to unpack there

[couldbebetterforsure]

I never did get to update so I’ll say it now. A couple days ago I finally finished the main story for Pokemon Violet!!!!

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

The end of Arven’s storyline broke my heart as much as it healed it. I was so happy to see Mabosstiff stand up and ready to play with Arven. And Arven just hugging his good boy, in tears. He deserved it! And you know what for a guy who says he’s bad at battling my boy Arven packed a hell of a punch in his battle! Especially his Mabosstiff, the good boy was a scary boy!!!

I was not surprised at all by Penny being Cassiopeia. Like, I would’ve been genuinely more shocked if it really HADN’T been her. Also gotta say...Clavell gave me a much harder time than her 😅 Though I appreciate the Eeveelution theme! And it was a really sweet ending that Team Star weren’t punished for being victims, that the truth came out and they can now move forward from their bullying openly and all together.

The Elite Four ended up being pretty easy overall, Hassel was the only one who gave me actual trouble. But I liked all of them as characters, especially my beloved crybaby grandpa Hassel, and I like how they stick around and make comments after each one’s turn. Geeta was also surprisingly easy for how she was built up as La Primera. It was both funny and kinda adorable that she had a Gogoat on her team. Honestly if she had put that Glimmora of hers in the lead I would’ve had a MUCH harder time. Nemona’s final showdown finally came along too aaaaaand....I demolished her. It’s actual hilarious how badly I wrecked her. Sorry Nemona!

As for the final storyline, Area Zero was gorgeous! And it has some of the best area music in the game! I loved interacting with the robo future Pokemon and I enjoyed the slow hints over what happened and the reveal of Turo’s true nature (even though I was already spoiled on this it didn’t make the reveal any less wow). My only problem was I kept having trouble figuring out how to get to certain areas that I would literally send my character plummeting off cliffs and the sides of roads because I couldn’t figure out how to get down 😅

The final Turo battle was soooo much fun! A fun challenge, great music, beautiful environment, it had it all! And the Miraidon vs Miraidon showdown was so great, even if it’s a scripted battle. Karui, baby, you earned that comeback against the other Miraidon! And for fuck’s sake, what does Gamefreak have against Arven???? This poor kid...this game, ESPECIALLY this finale, was not kind to him. My sweet little sunbeam chef, I knew I chose right having you as my fave. The ending group picture was super cute. And hell yeah, I finally got to officially get Karui and actually NAME him Karui at last! I’m keeping him in ride mode though since that way he can actually hang out with the rest of the gang.

So yeah my final Paldea squad is Carmine the Meowscarada, Trueno the Pawmot, Anyu the Fidough, Gwendolyn the Ceruledge, Freyja the Tinkaton,  Havilland the Kilowattrel, and Karui the Miraidon!

I actually had a great time in Paldea! The story was fun and the characters were lovely. It’s a shame, I feel a little more time in the oven and this game could’ve been something real special for everyone instead of being so known for its bugs. But either way, I enjoyed it a ton and, maybe after I finish Engage, I’ll be continuing to do post game and catch those Ruinous Legends!

[boyfhee]

OKAY IM BACK 🤩🤩 ( after some self reflection on my attachment to take two ) NGL I DIDNT EXPECT YOU TO GIVE ME A SHOUTOUT OR EVEN FOR ME TO HELP PLAY A PART ( even if its a teeny tiny bit ) IN THE ENDING ??? you can literally imagine my surprise when i opened the app after a goodnight sleep to see a new update and mentions of me in the a/n 😭😭 the ending was so fhdjsnjsnsks BITTERSWEET. it was so nice to know that they all found comfort in each other ultimately ( despite it not turning into something romantic wise at that moment ) and being such good friends ?? it really shows their growth as characters which behaved selfishly to ones that were willing to accept each others shortcomings whole heartedly ( at least imo ) . although yn doesnt have an endgame (cries cos my imaginations were running wild at the slightly open but not so open ending if you get what i mean ) , it feels very realistic that wonki hasnt moved on yet — especially since this happens a lot irl ( i never experienced it before but ive seen my friends go through it ! ). i think it was a very well written ending considering how you couldnt make everyones wishes come through ( talking about the readers choice of endgame ) but yet still delivered one of satisfactory level. it was such a wild ride watching ynki make every mistake we as humans could make. miya was truly a test - she was testing my patience half the time 💀💀💀. but miya also serves as a reminder to everyone of how easily it is to unknowingly cheat on your partner without having to lay a single hand or even touch the person. emotional cheating is JUST AS BAD AS PHYSICALLY CHEATING IF NOT WORST ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ i kinda feel bad (?) for wonki though because even though they were given closure and time to heal, it always felt more like a right person wrong time kind of thing so they will never be able to properly move on imo. IT MAKES ME EVEN SADDER THAT IT FEELS LIKE YN GETS THE HAPPY ENDING AND WONKI GOT A HAPPY ENDING TOO BUT IT COMES WITH A CHANCE THAT THEY MIGHT NEVER BE ABLE TO GET ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH YN EVER AGAIN. its really giving “ feels like we have matching wounds but mines still black and bruised and yours is perfectly fine “ < the exit - conan gray >

okay i feel like i should stop here before i get carried away and keep repeating the same points but more aggressively with each sentence 🥶🥶 i was actually a pure literature student before i graduated from school and its been a while since i had graduated so it was really fun to be able to make analysis on characters again as well as figure out plots through diction 🤩🤩 i cant thank you enough for writing take two because it gave me a chance to put my literature to good use, it wouldve been a real shame if i studied so hard just for me to never use it ever again. thank you thank you thank you thank you.

please have a good rest and all the best for your studies ! i had national exams last year and it absolutely beat the crap out of my brain 😭😭 had me tearing at every math question and feeling hella defeated. its going to be tough but you can do it !! take as long as you need for your break ! you absolutely deserve it after dropping that bombass smau 😩😩😩😩 i will look forward to your return with full excitement ! take care ~

- 🎐 ( its been a pleasure being one of take twos biggest fans - self proclaimed )

WINDCHIME ANON HEHE HELLO 💗💗 no bc a shoutout was a must bc ur ask helped me pick the direction i wanted to go with the ending. and i was so scared bc ppl were hoping for a ynwon ending but i gave them kind of nothing i was like 'what if they dont like' BUT FUCK IT BC IN MY EYES YN DOESNT DESERVE A HAPPY ENDING JUST YET . tbh the whole point of the friends part was that they were willing to give their relationship another try despite the mistakes, call that character development. and miya was created solely to tell people how important communication is. none of this would've happened if riki told yn about miya, if yn told him ab meeting miya, if riki told yn ab his plan, the communication was gone on so many levels. the thing that ruined ynki, if you ask me, was the lack of communications. not miya, not jungwon, not media, not fans, but yn and riki themselves. SO CHIYUV NATION, COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY. ALWAYS. take it from me i love clearing things out and it always ends well unless u start phrasing things wrong ( dont do it )

AND ANON WE R GETTING A PART TWO WITH SEPARATE ENDINGS let ur imagination run wild again ☝️☝️ that conan gray lyrics r so ksdjfhhs fits so well fr. AND OMG HI FELLOW LIT. STUDENT i had science but also had eng on the side, spent my youth editing drafts and analysing proses and poetry it was fun . everyday i think about ur asks ab take two and it makes miso happy (sunghoon hi) bc they rlly made my day U ARE THE BIGGEST TAKE TWO FAN i will give u that medal 🥇

[cinnamonest]

Genshin Boys - Dick HCs

I've gotten 9 asks like this, several since January, the people have spoken, so here we goooooo

I refuse to believe in any small dicks, small dicks don't exist in Teyvat it is the law bc I said so, so I'm kinda going in random order

Nonetheless each dick is deserving of love and each dick is special in its own way and I'm gonna tell y'all why.

Things being taken into account: size, refractory time, amount of cum, how quickly they cum/stamina, how many rounds they can go, sensitive spots, and any potential uniquenesses

Not actually any real content warnings here, but there's a lot of discussion of cum, so if fluids bother you a lot, avoid this. Also mentions of piercings, circumcision/foreskin and abnormal sexual abilities for the non-humans (Zhongli, Xiao, Venti, as well as homunculus-Albedo here), mentions of cum inflation

Also I'm so glad I posted this after staff saw my blog and not before lmao

--------------------

Zhongli

Yeah you saw this coming. Insert pillar joke here.

Anyway, it's excessive in terms of both length and girth, but especially girth. Ironically, he's actually not all that aware of it, either. Likely most non-humans have rather large dicks so he thinks he's about average, doesn't realize it's especially large in comparison to human norms. However, being as old as he is, he's mastered the ability to prevent unwanted hardness and can control when he does and doesn't get hard except in very intense circumstances, and also can go a very very long time without cumming, so the stamina is virtually unmatched by anyone else here. Can go literal hours edging himself and you without cumming, only unlike you who will inevitably come undone, he can keep composure with ease.

He's sweet about it though, works you up to be able to take it, and he has a moderate amount of precum so it slides in more easily.

Also has very heavy/intense twitches, like if it twitches inside you you will feel it raking against your insides, which can cause some unexpected spikes of pleasure.

Archons and adepti have like... Ungodly amounts of cum. He specifically has the most, moreso than Venti or Xiao. It's enough to cause cum inflation for sure, a cute bulge in your stomach because your womb is just overinflated with cum. He specifically has about 6x the normal amount of cum for a human man per orgasm. Refractory is moderate, but round capability is literally endless, so you have to be the one to call it quits eventually.

Razor

Also on the very large side, it's funnier with him than Zhongli/Diluc though, kinda comical looking because it's disproportionate to his much smaller body.

Remember how I said high testosterone, which comes from meat and sunlight and degree of outdoors-y-ness, scientifically contributes to sex drive? It's been proven to contribute to dick size too.  He's totally unaware of course, he has no idea what an "average" dick looks like for humans, but he knows he's bigger than the wolves, so he's at least content with that. Probably insecure bc he doesn't have a knot and thinks he should

It gets hard very easily, and he's also much better than most people at maintaining a hard-on even while moving around a lot. Unfortunately he has no concept of shame. He'll just get hard and just. Rather than trying to cover it up, he'll maneuver so that it's more free/comfortable which is almost always very visible. You can't take him out in public places without this becoming a problem.

Also, I've mentioned this before but he has a very short refractory period. It fits his doggie nature. He's just ready to go again nearly immediately.

Hair is everywhere, boy has never stopped to consider something like cutting it, I mean have you seen the hair on his head? He can be convinced to do so if you want him to, though, although you'd probably have to do it, he's still not very good at holding small utensils like scissors or tableware or writing utensils, so he'd just cut himself by accident.

Kaeya

He's not a smug bastard for no reason. He has like... The ideal dick. If you did surveys and crafted the absolute ideal dick based on average preferences based on length and girth, congrats this is what you would have. Not too big to be painful, not too small, just perfect, and, only further contributing to the degree of said smug bastardliness, it has a slight upward curve so that it hits exactly where it's supposed to. A moderate amount of cum, varies depending on how long it's been since he last came.

The worst part of it all is that he KNOWS all of this and is well aware of the effect it has, which gives a massive and very unnecessary boost to an already over the top ego.

He's not quite like some others here where he gets like fully hard nearly immediately, but he does get hard to about half mast very easily and a does so LOT, all the time just bc he's a horny boi and gets easily excited by the most meager of visual stimulation. He can also maintain a hard on for a looooong time. He's developed a habit of drifting off into fantasies during boring meetings, so he's used to just hiding it under the table and letting his mind wander.

He's one that shaves completely, he just likes the way it feels.

The only downside/insecurity for him is that he's not the longest lasting man in the world, he just loves you so much you know? But he recovers pretty quickly and can go lots of rounds, just none of them very long.

Xingqiu

A bit lengthy, a slight curve, but not too strong of one. Most likely to be cut out of anyone, I could see an upper-class family circumcising for whatever reason.

It's very cute, even though it's not tiny, very pink and soft, but also veiny. Also another one that has a lot of precum and cum, being hydro and all.

Thankfully, he's also the most well-kept out of anyone, so unlike some people you never have to worry about it being musky or tasting awful. Probably goes out of his way to consume things that are supposed to make cum taste better. Also shaves religiously. He's just really into hygiene on these things.

However, for all his bratty smugness, he's actually pretty bad at controlling erections and can get hard against his will pretty easily. It's one of a few things you can really make him embarrassed about and make him lose composure so, use this to your advantage.

Stamina is around average, refractory is kinda short since he's a younger guy and still easily excitable.

Venti

About average in terms of length/girth, but it has a strong upward curve that hits the spot perfectly and directly. That and, combined with many centuries of experience, he knows exactly what he's doing and will make you come undone pretty quickly.

Another one that's got a really aesthetically pleasing dick, it's pretty and soft and the curve is really nice. It just looks really nice going in and out of you. Also has a particular sensitivity to his balls, if you suck on them or lick at them or lightly roll them in your hands he's just automatically in heaven and will cum much faster.

Like Zhongli and Xiao and others of their kind, he has a lot of cum, about 3x normal humans, and can go quite a few rounds. While he does have a moderate refractory, he can stay hard in between rounds, even fucks you while he's recovering, as he has a slight thing for overstimulating himself.

If he's sober he's more reserved, but honestly if you get him drunk he gets hard way easier and has much, much less shame about hiding it, will more or less just let himself be visibly hard.

Chongyun

Chongyun tries to avoid getting hard like it's the plague. Like. Imagine his episodes, but ALSO lacking blood in the brain. He's very afraid of losing control and having a horrifically embarrassing occurrence of wildly trying to fuck some poor person, especially if its a darling.

But as a side effect, part of his meditations involve controlling erections, so he actually has very good control over getting hard and can be horny without getting hard, as well as popping it up on command.

As a simultaneous result, he's got ungodly stamina and can go for quite a while before cumming, he's definitely your go-to if you take a while to cum. His dick is about average length but pretty thick, so it hits all the spots it should. As a downside, it really hurts your jaw pretty quickly if you're blowing him.

It's also like, the softest dick you've ever held. The skin is so smooth and soft it feels like your mouth and hands just glide over it.

Also, his dick is significantly more reddish and twitchy if he's in one of his episodes, which is most of the time. If he manages to keep himself cool while fucking, it's less so. Speaking of which, he tries to control himself and has managed to meditate to where he can get a few minutes in without losing control, whereas before he used to spiral as soon as he got hard, but he now can get a bit in while maintaining his composure... it never lasts though, he inevitably loses it once he gets really into it.

Childe

Above average length, but very much above average girth. It's heavy, like, even soft when it's in your hands or mouth you can feel it has an actual weight to it. He's well aware, and teases you about it quite a bit. Talks himself up quite a bit, unfortunately you can't mock him for it because he can actually back up his claims.

He keeps the hair not totally shaven but trimmed most of the way down, so it's actually pretty nice because it prevents chaffing while not being too scratchy.

It's not as much as the non-humans, but he does have quite a bit of cum for a human. Especially if it's been a few days since he's last cum, it builds up and he also shoots really far, too. Like, he's one of those dudes that HAS to grab a cloth or something to catch it because if he just jerks off openly it'll shoot all the way to his face. Moderate refractory, it's not too bad, but it also enables him to go a lot of rounds and get in good oral action on you in between.

Bonus, out of anyone he's most likely to have piercings, likely a ladder or studs somewhere. They rub against your insides just perfectly and it just puts you in a state of bliss so intense all you can do is twitch and convulse.

Albedo

Similar to Kaeya, has pretty much the ideal dick, was probably intentionally made that way. He was also made to have a lot of precum, it's actually kinda mesmerizing to look at - if you kinda run your hands over his cock when it's hard it just oozes out with your touch. Like the archons he has excess cum, but not quite as much as them, his is just about 2x the norm.

But of all the homuncular benefits, the best for him is prolonged orgasm. Human male orgasms only last like half to 2/3 the duration of female ones, but he was specifically designed so his last just as long, and even sync up to the average orgasm duration of a partner.

The hair is just kinda trimmed back, but it's not as coarse as normal pubes, it's soft and thin and blonde so it's not bad at all.

Random HC but is particularly sensitive under the foreskin. If you do the hentai thing where you kinda lap your tongue around the base where the foreskin is he just ascends.

Scaramouche

Inverse of Childe, above average girth but very much above average length. Your poor, poor cervix, it's like this dick was designed to put you in pain. It's straight with no curve so it literally rams directly against your cervix with every thrust, and he knows it too, and makes an intentional effort to pound into it as hard as possible.

He's got significant stamina and can last quite a while, up to a half hour or so, but he does have a normal refractory in between. Cums about an average amount, but like Childe, it shoots really far, so if he pulls out expect it to get all over your stomach, chest, even face and hair. (And if he's pulling out, it's because you begged him to, so expect him to very intentionally get it on your face).

Trims a moderate amount, but is particular about hygienics much like Xingqiu.

He has an intense sensitivity along the frenulum (underside of the head) and will shiver and involuntarily moan if you lick at it -- and subsequently get embarrassed over his reaction and punish you for doing something good, even though he'd like to feel it again.

Also very much a grower, which can startle poor darling and has been a subject of slight embarrassment because to an observer who might catch him changing or showering, he actually appears to be kinda small, but you'll quickly realize that's not the case once he actually gets hard.

Xiao

Kinda like Razor where it almost looks kinda funny bc it's disproportionate to the size of his tiny body. Length is slightly above average but girth is way above average, boi has a fat cock that will stretch you out to a point it's painful.

Veiny and reddish, it can get really reddened when he's hard. And he actually gets hard like... Really, really easily. It's kind of inconvenient and embarrassing for the poor thing, always having to shift positions and sit awkwardly just bc he saw half a tiddie and is immediately fully hard. He's like a teenage boy, getting hard from hugs or if you pat his head.

Fun fact, the hair around it is actually the teal-ish color like the underside of the hair on his head. He's kinda like Razor here too, he's never thought to cut or shave it and would see doing so as a waste of time, and unlike Razor can't be convinced to do so, so, you just gotta deal with that.

Also I mentioned this with the archons but adepti also cum a LOT, about 4-5x normal humans. But also, adepti specifically, even unlike archons, have no refractory. Just... None. Doesn't exist. So while he cums pretty quickly, it just goes from one round to the next in an instant, there's no waiting to get hard again. This does create a somewhat icky sensation when you have copious amounts of cum inside you already but keep getting fucked, so it's just sloshing all around and spilling out all down your thighs.

Diluc

Listen.

I refuse to accept anything short of this man having the largest canonical dick in Teyvat. Nothing else is possible. Lawachurls? Geovishaps?? Andrius??? Don't know em, they got nothin on ya boi.

Diluc exudes bde the way the sun exudes light. It just rolls off of his being. You could place a blindfolded man in front of Diluc and be like "does this man have bde?" And without even needing to take the blindfold off he would agree because his dick literally has a presence that you can feel. I am correct no I do not accept criticism.

He is aware of it to some degree but doesn't realize how much it actually is. He probably thinks he's like, slightly above average. Doesn't realize he has a fucking monster dick until you're literally crying under him because you feel like you're being carved in half. He doesn't know how to feel about it at first, but will become smug about it over time.

When he gets horny he spaces out a lot bc the body just ain't got enough blood for his brain too. Head empty. He's gotta choose between mental clarity and horny at any given moment.

It's pretty too, despite being so big. Soft and pink and has a lot of precum. Hair matches the hair on his head color wise but he keeps it kinda trimmed down. Not very veiny, surprisingly, it's actually very smooth.

Also a shower. It's very inconvenient bc he'll sometimes wear too-tight pants or bend the wrong way and now the whole world is aware his dick goes down most of his thigh.

Cums a lot, as imaginable, and surprisingly low refractory time, which is good because he does cum pretty quickly/easily due to inexperience and tendency to repress himself.

Bennett

It's actually really cute, very pinkish and smooth, he's more on the long side rather than girthy. His also has a little curve to it, kind up upwards at the end.

More of a grower, it's about average when soft, but once you get him going it gets longer. Which is a fairly easy task to accomplish, really, he's very very easily excited, and is very easily embarrassed by it. He also has like... A LOT of precum. It just oozes out really easily, which can create a problem when he gets hard in inconvenient times and ends up creating a wet spot on the front of his pants, poor thing.

Sweet boy is a bit reckless as with all things, he doesn't really shave or anything, but he can be convinced to pretty easily, especially if it means promises of more blowjobs.

Being the excited lil thing he always is, he's got boundless stamina and a very short refractory, never more than 5 minutes or so. However, equally due to being the excited lil thing he always is, he can get ahead of himself and cum very quickly at times, he gets pretty embarrassed about it too.

Aether

He's another member of the "disproportionate to his body size" club, particularly in length moreso than girth, which is about average. He's similar to Scaramouche in that it's pretty straight and uncurved and will absolutely ram into your cervix in a way that's both painful and intensely pleasurable.

He trims well, has soft blonde hair too. He doesn't have all that much precum, but he does have a lot of cum, and is another long-range shooter than can get it all over your chest even when he's sitting in between your legs.

He's moderate on how fast he cums, not very quickly, but can't last a super long time, and his refractory is average-to-short. He's insanely sensitive around the head, if you just swirl your tongue around it he'll probably cum on the spot.

Also, it's not quite like Albedo's since his is artificial, but Aether also has slightly longer orgasms than most guys. It allows him to just remain in that bliss just a little bit longer, which is great for both of you.

Kazuha

Kazuha is among the "disproportionate to his body size" group. His primary source of pride is its length, and it has a nice curve. Like Chongyun, it's actually very soft and smooth, feels pleasant in your hands or mouth (so long as you're not choking for the latter). His feels heavy as well, as he's more of a shower than a grower, so it kinda hangs down, which, frankly, can get a bit inconvenient in the kind of clothing he wears, but he's gotten used to the feeling.

Due to having gotten used to a roaming sort of life and not always having tools available, well, unfortunately he's gotten to where he doesn't upkeep very well, so he's got a bit of hair, but thankfully it's kinda naturally thin and softer than most. He'll definitely cut it down if asked, provided he has some way to do so.

Discipline is an important part of his lifestyle you know! And he applies that to, well, everything, so he's kinda trained himself via self-edging and can last a long while by doing so if he tries, stopping abruptly when he's about to cum, taking a few deep breaths to focus, and then starting back up after the arousal dies down just the slightest bit. His dick is one of those that twitches a lot, and so strongly that you can even feel the twitches when he's buried all the way inside. He cums a pretty normal amount, but shoots rather far -- if he pulls out it'll definitely hit your collarbones, or even your face. Not that he pulls out often. He strongly prefers to cum inside, it's one of his favorite things.

And speaking of discipline, luckily for him, he can control erections fairly well, taking deep breaths and focusing his thoughts to keep it down. It took some practice, of course, but being the little pervert he is, he's had plenty of practice. And when he does get hard, he's also mastered the art of positioning himself and his clothing to make sure it's hard to see.

Thoma

Thoma, unfortunately for him, is pretty much the opposite of Kazuha when it comes to control -- poor thing gets hard pretty easily, especially if given any visual stimuli, and he can't really get it to go down very easily. Give him a break, he's a very sexually repressed guy, ok? He tries to hide it, but... it's pretty obvious that that's exactly what he's doing. It's actually kinda cute, to be honest. He's about halfway between shower and grower -- it certainly gets bigger when hard, but doesn't exactly shrink when soft, either.

He's also more noticeable on length, but the girth is good too. He's got more of a straight cock, though, one that will practically impale you and your poor cervix and insides with it. Ow. His is veiny, it's got that thing where it gets really reddish at the tip when he's hard, and, notably, he has a lot of precum too. He's very adamantly hygienic, though, shaves pretty frequently, he just prefers the smoothness of it.

He... cums pretty easily. Poor thing. He can try, but he's not very good at holding it in -- it's kind of a source of embarrassment, and he'll apologize pretty profusely, which is, again, kinda cute. But not to worry, his refractory is a little bit on the sort side, and more importantly, the stamina is endless -- he can go again and again and again, provided he just gets a bit of a break in between. Amount of cum is moderate, but like some others, he's another one that shoots a good distance, but he actually likes getting it somewhere on your body -- seeing cum on your chest, legs, back, face, it's all really nice, and is a surefire way to get him hard again.

Also, the underside is particularly sensitive. Lick it or rub on it a bit and it's a good way to make him cum even faster than he's already going to, and without any warning whatsoever.

Gorou

Given his hybrid nature, while the length is good on it's own, the primary noticeable trait is it's thickness, and more importantly, the prominent knot that develops once he gets hard -- both the thickness and the knot are designed to keep him locked tightly inside a darling... even if you're trying to pull away. Once the knot gets in, it's not coming out, not unless you're willing to put yourself in intense pain trying to get away, as it stretches your insides out to their maximum capacity. But also due to the knot, he can't really pull off the whole slow, long movements in and out, so he's instead prone to quick, hard pounding with those inches that he can actually get in and out. He has a good deal of cum, certainly far more than a regular human, and it's just enough to create that cute swell in your stomach.

Like a lot of animals, his dick kinda has a permanent reddish color to it, even when not hard, and is noticeably darker than the rest of his skin. It's also got a more blunt tip/head, as opposed to a rounder one like a human's.

One of the problematic aspects to his hybrid nature is that he gets hard at the drop of a hat, and it's very hard to miss the large swelling under his clothes. Lust clouds his brain more easily than it would a normal person's, and he loses his inhibitions due to arousal more easily as well, essentially his brain gets lost in a haze, keeping him from making sound and rational decisions. The poor thing is very frequently running off to go take care of it.

Finally, he does experience ruts. It's unfortunate, really, an inconvenience for him, he thinks. He gets significantly more aggressive and irritable, changing his normally bubbly and pleasant demeanor a bit, although he does make an effort to fight it. He usually exerts that energy through fighting, but once he has a darling, well, he can get out all the pent up frustration and energy into you instead. And pretty much zero refractory. Have fun with that.

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[inhum3n]

The Dark Side of Maladaptive Daydreaming

TW: I don’t talk about specific violent topics(just mainly say “i have violent daydreams”), but if you don’t want to read anything about the dark side of daydreams just go ahead and skip this one.

I’m feely kinda shitty and anxious, and to actually be a little more proactive this time I pushed myself to write this overdue post instead of daydreaming. I mean either way I’ll end up daydreaming before I go to bed...moving on.

A couple of weeks ago The Daydreamers was released. And it was a good dip-a-toe-in-the-water introduction about maladaptive daydreaming. Afterwards I read a few tumblr posts about it, and I remember there was one post where anon expressed their frustration with the doc presenting MaDDing as this escape to a happy wonderland. This is a criticism I’ve heard before, and one I’ve had myself. 

When I first got involved in the MaDD community online I was frustrated to see -what appeared to me - MaDDers not taking it seriously. They were sharing art of their paras, paracosms, writing about their wonder fantasies, and posting memes. To me this came across as almost “lacking a depth”, I knew that humor is a coping mechanism, but I was upset that there seemed to be so so few posts with in depth dives into the negatives of MaDD. To me it looked like everyone else was peachy with it, while I withering with it’s burden. That’s why I started this blog, to create the content I wanted to see(no shame to those who rather post light hearted stuff).

To start off, I always dislike that the word “daydreaming” is included in the name of this condition, because “daydreaming” has a very “cute” and “innocuous” connation in our language.  And to be frank, cute and innocuous are probably the last words I’d use to describe my daydreams.

My daydreams can contain incredibly dark, morbid, and violent things. There is a common theme of isolation, loneliness, being misunderstood, and martyr complexes. My parame suffering, all the while being criticized and hated by those around them.  That’s a very common theme, being hated because I’m misunderstood and I am going through some struggle unbeknownst to those around me. I would best title it as “Look at how everyone misjudges and hates me, but I am really a good person whose made sacrifices for others but has been wronged many times but I refuse to open up about it because I am afraid and because I don’t think I deserve to seek help and I am socially anxious”. 

And while there is this common underlying theme, it tends to manifest in disturbing and/or violent ways. 

*by manifest I mean what the content of the paracosm is.

And if I were to be honest, alot and I mean alot of my paracosms are straight up depressing, and their frequency tends to increase in quantity and disturbance level the more unhappy I am in real life.

But why do I/we do it? My best answer is that it’s a way to live out and externalize negative emotions I/we struggle to express and explore in our actual lives. The daydreaming gives a filter, a “safe place” to externalize, feel, and express these bad feelings. I wonder too if it acts as a disconnecting mechanism, you can experience your emotions through the paras you created, that way you don’t have to feel them as your own emotions that have occurred due to your life circumstances. Can I say it’s bit like a disassociating mechanism? Personally for me I’ve always tended to feel invalidated in my negative feelings. I felt (and still do) that I did not/have not earned sadness. That its stupid for me to be upset so much by something when there are so many other people with so much worse, so I create a fictional world where my parame experiences traumatic events that then make me feel justified to express my negative emotions through my parame. Because obviously those negative emotions make sense in the context of my parame’s life, but my actual life? Absolutely not.

TBH, I was gonna write a few examples of these dark paracosms but I backed out because honestly I’m still too nervous and scared to share the details. Sure I’m anonymous on this platform, but I know once somethings out on the internet it stays there forever. And I am afraid of the wrong people finding my post detailing my horrific daydreams and then somehow finding out who I am and they think i’m fucked up and so on....So this is all for now. These thoughts are from my personal experiences and I don’t speak for every MaDDer. 

[lavenderwhore444]

So imagine this the reader is a hero and shigaraki is a villain of course anyways shiggy falls head over heels for the reader and always tries to get there attention while the reader does find shigaraki cute but he’s being a pain in the ass always destroying things and making messes, reader kidnapped him and  Using him as a fuck toy ( of course our little  pervert is enjoying this ) anyways the reader straight up tells him if he behaves and start doing good things he’ll get rewarded and actually get to cum, long story short tahts how shigaraki stopped being a villain and destroying things

If you want to use interactive fics, it's easy and makes reading fics SO much better. First, you download the Google Chrome extension. You'll see it in the top right corner of your screen. Next, you enter your name in the first box. If you want to change something other than y/n, please click on the text that says “want to change something other than y/n?” here, you can change any word you want to a different word. When I talk about your quirk I will use y/q

Anon, I am excited to say that all of your requests are done and I'm soooooo excited

InteractiveFics

Masterlist

This feeds my saviour complex 🤤

Warnings: edging, blowjob, Shiggy cums in your mouth, lol, fingering (female), vaginal sex, porn (filming), Tomura wasn't as submissive as I planned and pretty much doms you in the end 😞. He's kinda subby at the beginning tho. THIS COULD’VE BEEN SO MUCH BETTER IM MAD. If this gets 1,000 notes, I'll rewrite it 😏 I never say shit like that but yolo ig.

I love you all and hope you eat food and drink some water.

“Shiggy why the actual fuck are we here? It’s the middle of nowhere and that hero y/n’s base is here, ” Dabi complained.

“Shut up. I’m your boss, ” he said, giddy with excitement.

He was so excited to see you: your cool quirk and costume, your pretty voice and face. Plus you’d pay attention to him. You both fought close range, so he’d be able to get a good look at you. He'd get to admire how beautiful you looked up close. The last time he saw you, he swore you were blushing at him. It wasn't like him to flirt with heroes. That was Dabi’s thing, but he couldn't resist.

“Dabi burn that down, ” he ordered.

“Yes boss, ” he muttered, setting the building ablaze.

It was the sixth time in two weeks blue flames were seen from out your window. You sighed, stretched and walked towards the burning building.

“Again?!” you said, saving the last of the people inside.

“I just couldn't resist, ” Tomura smiled, “I missed you y/n if you’d just give me your number, we wouldn't have to do this, ”

“In your dreams, creep, ” you scoffed.

“You're so mean to me, “ he pouted, letting you dodge his punch on purpose.

“God fucking damn it Shigaraki. Stop burning my shit down!” you yelled in frustration.

“Then go out with me. Then I'll quit burning things down. Please y/n? I promise, ” he said.

You groaned, “no, Shigaraki, I won't go out with you, ”

“I love it when you say my name, ” he sighed, “you have such a pretty voice y/n, ”

You slapped him on the back, tripping him with your other foot.

“Just get out of here, ” you said.

“Fine, fine, but i’ll be back for you my love!” he called as he stumbled into the warp gate.

You smiled to yourself. Shigaraki was kind of cute, but he always made such a mess. It was a shame, really.

A bruise-covered Tomura stumbled upstairs. Normally he’d be mad that an enemy marked up his avatar but they were your bruises. Proof that you had touched him with those gorgeous hands. He shrugged off his coat to find a note stuck to it.

‘xxx-xxx-xxxx’

It was your number. You gave him your number. He practically skipped downstairs. He slid into the seat beside Dabi and waved the note in his face.

“She gave me her number, ” Shigaraki bragged.

“Ha, funny story, ” Dabi deadpanned, lighting a cigarette.

“Whatever, I don't need you to believe me, ” he said.

He walked upstairs and sat on the bed to make a contact for you. He put you as ‘y/n <3’ with his favorite picture of you. The picture was from your very first fight. You and All Might were smiling at the camera. He had bought photoshop for two reasons, the first to get All Might out of the picture and second, so he could enhance the photo of you. He ran a finger over your digital face.

“So pretty, ” he whispered, “my pretty y/n, ”

Shigaraki finally worked up the courage to text you.

I knew you'd give in eventually y/n

ᵈᵉˡⁱᵛᵉʳᵉᵈ

He put his phone down and started playing his game. Before he knew it, hours had gone by. He checked his phone.

I knew you'd give in eventually y/n

ᵒᵖᵉⁿᵉᵈ

Whatever come see me

I'm not dumb y/n this is a trap

I thought you liked me

ᵒᵖᵉⁿᵉᵈ

I promise it’s not a trap

And I never thought I'd say this but I do like you Shigaraki

Even if you make a mess of the city

Every

Fucking

Day

Get over here before I change my mind creep

📍 y/n sent their location 📍

Fine

ᵒᵖᵉⁿᵉᵈ

Shigaraki gave Kurogiri the adress.

“Here. Now, ” he ordered, putting on his artist's gloves.

The warp gate opened, and he took a shaky breath before stepping through. He entered your living room, it was surprisingly cozy, and you had lit a fire. You weren't in the room, so he sent you another text.

I'm here

ᵒᵖᵉⁿᵉᵈ

He heard you open the door and walk in.

“Hey creep, ” you said.

You sat in front of him on the couch.

“You can sit but if you want to keep standing there like an idiot go ahead, ” you said.

He scoffed, “the real idiot is the person who let a villain walk into her house after sending him her location, ”

“Touche, ” you responded, “but I know you'd never hurt me. The city and everyone else is fair game apparently,”

“Just let go of the whole destroying cities thing, ” he said, putting an arm around you, “I was just doing it to impress you, ”

“The only thing that was impressive is all the extra hours I had to put in, ” you snapped.

The room fell silent.

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you, but you do really stress me out, Shigaraki, ” you sighed, “so I guess it’s only fair that you help me relax, ”

You straddle his lap, putting your hands in his hair

“You're going to live here from now on and pay off your debt to me, Shiggy. And if you're good, you'll even get a reward, ” you said, tapping your finger on his nose.

“What do you mean rela- oh, ” he said, realizing what you meant.

“You don't have to if you don't want to, baby, ” you said, kissing his forehead, “you'd never hurt me, and I'd never hurt you, ”

You wiggled your hips in his lap, “although something tells me you want this as much as I do, Shiggy, ”

“Yeah whatever, ” he mumbled, embarrassed, “go ahead, ”

“You sure?” You asked, nuzzling the side of his neck.

The only time you touched people as a pro-hero was if you were fighting them or saving them. Having Shigaraki here was so nice. He was rubbing your back and holding you. Despite being with a villain, you felt so safe.

“I'm sure, y/n, ” Shigaraki said.

He moved your face in front of his and kissed you. Neither of you had much experience when it came to kissing or romance in general. You were too busy fighting each other. All things considered, your first kiss was pretty good. You never thought you'd have a villain in your house, let alone on your lips. He rubbed his hands up and down your waist.

“Use me however you want y/n you deserve it, baby. I trust you, ” he mumbled against your lips.

It didn't take long for the two of you to strip, shoving your tongues into each other a mouths. Shigaraki didn't really know what to do. He mostly learned from porn. He just kind of rubbed your cunt smiling when you jumped as he found your clit. He learned quickly, rubbing it harshly as you whined into his mouth. He found your hole after a while, pressing a finger in. One didn't really do anything for you so he pressed in another one confused that it wasn't causing the reaction he wanted.

He started wiggling his fingers around until he felt an extra squishy part inside of you and rubbed it, causing you to start moaning again. He brought his other hand to your clit, letting you hump his hand.

“Shigaraki, ” you whined, “please don't stop, ”

“Not gonna stop, baby, ” he said, “don’t worry, ”

You didn't expect him to get you to cum his first try, but soon, you were feeling the pleasure intensify until it broke, ripping through your body.

“No more baby, ” you groaned, “too much, ”

He pulled his hands away and pressed his forehead to yours.

“Thank you for letting me touch you like that y/n, ” he said.

“Its time for me to return the favor, ” you smiled knowing exactly what you wanted.

You lowered yourself onto him, adjusting as he groaned at the feeling of you around him. You felt so warm and wet, so tight around him. He bucked into you when you finally started bouncing. His nails dug into your hips. You decided to rile him up.

“Gonna make you cum so hard, baby, ” you said, nearly giggling, “gonna make you feel so good,”

You reached down to your clit, throwing your head back. His size made it quite easy to get yourself off, and before you knew it, you were right on the edge. You pushed yourself to cum as fast as possible, moaning and whimpering.

“So close baby, ” he groaned as your orgasm finished.

“Too bad, ” you said getting off of him, “did you really think you deserve to cum? After all the trouble you caused? You're gonna have to work for it Tomura Shigaraki, ”

“What the hell, ” he said, “that's not fucking fair. I made you cum twice, isn't that enough?”

“After all the shit you've done? No, no, no, baby, the only way you're gonna get to cum is if you start cleaning up your fucking messes. We’re going out tonight to help clean up that building you burnt up, ”

“No the fuck we’re not. I'm leaving. Fuck you, ” he said.

“Ah ah ah, ” you said, grabbing his phone and pressing two buttons, “kurogiri can't send any warp gates, and your quirk is neutralized. Plus, I'm keeping this phone, ”

He was livid. Maybe you were the real villain here.

“Dont look so sad baby, if you work hard enough, you could cum in the next couple of days. Until then, you're mine to fuck whenever and however I want, ” you said.

He scoffed, “I'm a villain y/n I'm not gonna let everyone see me acting like a fucking hero, ”

“Have fun being edged every day then, and no, you're not allowed to get yourself off. I can't trust you not to, so you're forcing me to tie you up. If only you would come to help your wonderful girlfriend who's just trying to help you have a better life, ” you said.

“Girlfriend?” he sputtered.

“Mhm, ” you said, “I like you, Shigaraki don't you remember? And you asked me out yesterday, ”

He stood there dumbfounded.

“Come on. I'm tired let's get to bed, ” you said, taking his hand.

You walked into the bathroom with him.

“Here I got you pajamas and a toothbrush. Do you need anything else?” you asked.

“No I'm good. Thanks, ” he said.

“No problem baby, ” you said, ruffling his hair.

You brushed your teeth and put on pajamas. You caught him by surprise and tied his hands together.

“Hey what the hell?” he said.

“Shiggy, I told you I couldn’t trust you to be a good boy. You forced my hand, ” you said, leading him to bed.

You both laid down, and you pulled him into your chest, cuddling him close.

“Mmm, good night Shiggy, ” you said.

“Fuck you y/n...goodnight, ” he grumbled.

You giggled and kissed the top of his head. Over the next few weeks, Shigaraki became more and more irritable. It was so annoying to be pushed to the edge every day just to watch you take his orgasm away.

“Fine!” he yelled, on the sixth week of his stay “fine! I'll clean up all the buildings Dabi burned down yesterday! Just let me cum y/n, baby, just let me cum, ” he begged.

You smiled and hugged him tightly, “oh Shiggy, I knew you'd give in and help me! I'm so proud of you. C’mon let's go right now and you can cum after. Any way you want baby, ”

To everyone's surprise, Shigaraki did a great job of cleaning up the building in record time. However, he did threaten everyone at least five times until you shot him a look to make him utter a ‘sorry.’ he had earned his phone back after that since he did such a good job.

He got his shit rocked that night, cumming until he was shaking and crying. Begging you for more.

“Please y/n please let me cum again, m-more I want more, ” he begged.

“Tell me how much you want it baby. Tell me how bad you need to cum, ” you said, taking him in your mouth again.

“Please, ” he cried, “please y/n I need it so bad, ”

You spent hours fucking him, fucking him even though you were over stimulated to the point of tears.

Meanwhile, the league was falling apart without him and disappearing almost completely. It was no secret that people were looking for him, but he was with other heroes all the time. They had no chance at getting him back.

‘So this is what it’s all about,’ he thought, ‘sure y/n is getting paid but not for this. Y/n cleans up and helps people for free. She never gets paid when she's helping behind the scenes. Neither do her friends. Maybe I had it all wrong. Maybe I was right about heroes when I was a kid, ‘

“Y/n, ” he said one night, “I want to get my license. I want to be a real hero, just like I wanted when I was a kid. I was wrong. I was wrong about all of this, ”

You smiled and kissed him hard, “I knew you'd come around, Tomura. You deserve a special reward, baby, ”

He grinned, “what did you have in mind?”

“Mmm, how would you like to show the entire world that I'm all yours?” you asked.

“Id fucking love that y/n, ” he said.

You kissed him. It was messy and loving. He left hickeys all over your neck, snapping picture after picture.

“You want to take a few of me a sucking your cock? Want a fucking video for everyone to see? Let everyone know I suck your cock? Yeah, do you want that baby?” you teased, settling between his legs.

“Do you when have to ask?” he said grabbing your hair on a ponytail, “go on baby, don't be shy, ”

He had his phone in his hand as you licked a long strip up his shaft.

“Tell them who you belong to, baby, ” he groaned.

“You, ” you said, sucking on the head of Shigaraki’s cock making him moan, “I belong to you, Shiggy, I'm yours baby, ”

“That's right, ” he whispered.

You started bobbing your head as he moved more hair out of your face zooming in on you.

“Smile for the camera baby, ” he teased.

You smiled around his cock as best you could while still sucking him off. He kept the camera trained on your face as he shoved you down the rest of the way, causing you to gag. He whispered out a quiet ‘fuck’ as you struggled around him.

“Oh fuck, ” he groaned, using your mouth, “almost there, baby, keep taking my cock come on you can do it y/n, ”

You sucked harder trying to use your tongue as much as you could. You felt him pull you so your mouth was around his tip cumming in your mouth instead of your throat.

“Show them, baby, ” he said, zooming in on your mouth, “show them all the cum you took, ”

You opened your mouth, some dribbling down your chin.

“Swallow sweetie, ” he cooed.

You swallowed and opened your mouth again to show that it was empty.

He chuckled, “good job baby, ” he said petting your hair.

He stopped the video watching some of it through.

“Good job y/n you're a natural, ” he smirked.

You giggled and kissed his inner thigh.

“Lay down on your back on the bed for me, baby, ” he said, walking with you to the bedroom.

He ran his hand over your body, squeezing your tits and thighs.

“So pretty baby, ” Shigaraki whispered, panning the phone up your body.

You giggled, spreading your legs for him.

“God y/n look at that baby. So fucking wet for me. Just for me, ” he said

He ran a finger through the wetness between your legs. Once Shigaraki’s finger was coated, he brought it up to your mouth, getting a good view of your face as you sucked it clean. He laughed and dragged the finger back down your body to push it into you. He quickly added a second finger and working you up until you were moaning and moving against him frantically.

“Right there, ” you moaned, “please Shiggy I'm gonna, ”

“Go on, baby, let them see you cum for me, babe, ” he urged, bumping your clit with his thumb.

Your legs started shaking as you got louder, letting go around his fingers for the whole world to see. Thinking about that, everyone seeing a pro-hero brought to her knees by the most powerful ex villain.

“Want you inside, ” you muttered, “want you inside me, please Shiggy, ”

He smirked and lined you up, rubbing his cock against you before sliding in as your back arched.

“Shiggy, ” you whined, “baby please move, please fuck me, ”

“Sure princess, ” he snickered.

He got a good angle and started to thrust slowly. You whimpered, gripping the sheets as he began to speed up, listening to your moans and the squelch of your cunt as he plunged into you. He began to speed up, alternating between your face as you got lost in pleasure and the way his cunt hugged his cock. Shigaraki kept up a steady pace for a while before throwing it all away to fuck you ruthlessly, letting your tits bounce for the camera as you became more and more desperate for release.

“Shigaraki, ” you cried, “I need to cum, baby. Please, ”

He brought a finger down to your clit, rubbing slow circles that increased in speed slowly until he was rubbing it ruthlessly. Your moans only got louder as you bucked against him.

“I'm gonna cum, ” you whispered.

“Louder, baby, ” he said, starting to lose control.

“I'm gonna cum!” you cried.

“Do it, baby. Come on, let them see you lose control, let them see what I fucking do to you. Cum for me y/n.”

Your back arched, eyes rolled back as you let out a loud broken moan. Shigaraki moaned as he zoomed in on your face, contorted in pleasure.

“Fuck baby I'm gonna cum. Gonna cum inside of you baby girl, ” he grunted getting faster.

He let out a long moan as he halted inside of you, letting his cock shoot cum inside of you. He stayed still, panting before pulling out slowly. He let the camera focus on the sticky white liquid oozing out of you.

“Fuck, ” he whispered.

He dipped his finger into you and had you lick the cum off of it.

“I love you, ” he whispered, bracing himself for rejection.

“I love you too, ” you said, pulling him into a kiss with the phone forgotten.

The video was stopped as he pulled you close to him. Shigaraki held you to his chest, rubbing circles on your back.

“Guess what I'm drawing, ” he said, tracing a heart on your back.

“A flower?” you guessed.

“Nope, ” he said, kissing the top of your head, “a heart, ”

He grabbed his phone again, posting the videos.

“There we go, ” he whispered, “now they'll know you're all mine,”

[thekingslover]

Jetski For Sale (Lokius fic)

He stops riding the jetski.

He keeps it on the small trailer at the end of his driveway beside his modest split-level home and covers it with a blue tarp.

Every morning, in his brown button-up pajamas and a bathrobe, he walks to the end of the driveway and collects the morning paper. He’s careful to hold his coffee mug steady as he leans down, but he always manages to spill a drop or two. His slippers are covered in tiny coffee spots.

He tucks the newspaper under his arm and turns back toward his house. He left the television on; through the window, the screen flashes with the bright white letters, Breaking News! Two houses down, his neighbor is already out mowing the lawn. Further away, a dog barks.

Though he lives alone, it’s a perfect life. Everything’s simple. His mortgage is affordable. His brown sedan is paid off. And the jetski...

He doesn’t remember buying it. He always wanted one, dreamed of it. He had a savings set aside for someday. Yet... his savings is still there, and he still has this jetski.

He looks at it now, at the way it bulges under the tarp. A shame to leave it like that. He should take it out again. But the last time he did that...

Shaking his head, he walks back to the house. He drinks his coffee and reads his newspaper. He goes to work, comes home, goes to sleep, and does it all again the next day.

“Something’s different about you,” his sister says on the phone, their weekly call. “You sound different.”

“Same old me.” He’s good at keeping back his feelings and pushing forward the cheer.

She knows, though. Older sisters always seem to. “Are you sure you haven’t been seeing anyone lately?”

This sends him laughing. “A secret boyfriend? Come on, you have quite an imagination on you.”

“Laugh all you want,” she says, stern. She’s not backing down, though her voice does soften as she adds, “It’s only that you... Well, you sound... heartbroken.”

“That’s...” He should deny it. He hasn’t dated anyone in a good long while, but, well, now that she mentions it... He’s had his heart broken before, long ago, and it felt a little something like this. Like something crucial is suddenly missing. Like you spent so much time learning someone and adapting to them, shaping whole parts of your life around them, and then they are just... gone.

There’s a person-sized hole in his life now, but he can’t quite remember their shape.

No, that can’t be.

“That’s crazy,” he says, thinking, maybe I’m crazy.

“Why don’t you come visit us for a while?” she says. “The kids would love to see you.”

“Yeah,” he says, shaky. “Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea. Tell them I love them. Love you too.” Then he hangs up.

*

That night, he lays on his back in bed and stares at the ceiling, afraid to look to his right. He used to sleep sprawled across the entire width of the bed, a true bachelor enjoying his bachelorhood. When did he start picking one side?

He turns over, facing away from the barren expanse of the rest of the mattress, but the bookshelf offers little comfort. Most of his books are about history, biographies on interesting characters from the past. There’s a couple of jetski magazines wedged in, too. But what catches his eye... He remembers buying it, knows he did, the morning after watching a documentary on the perception of time and space. The documentarian had written a book. The Mobius Strip.

Frowning, he doesn’t find any sleep that night, no matter how many long minutes he closes his eyes, or how many sheep he tries to count in his head.

Mobius.

It’s a mathematical theory. Not a name. But it wedges between his ribs and stays buried behind them.

He’s not even a maths guy! But he can’t shake it. It feels heavy, too important.

He tosses and turns. He reaches out to the other side of the bed, realizes its empty, and snaps upright, dread overtaking him for one sharp moment before he remembers that its supposed to be empty.

This is normal. This is his perfect little life.

He flops back into bed and runs a hand down his face. Maybe he should go visit his sister, before he fully loses his mind.

*

His hands shake the next morning when he walks out to get the newspaper at the end of the driveway. Half his coffee spills when he leans to pick it up, but its fine. Maybe he should give up coffee entirely. Maybe too much caffeine is his problem.

He doesn’t know what’s wrong with him.

Turning towards the house, he spots the jetski, there under the blue tarp. The mysterious jetski that he doesn’t remember buying. The one, when he’s out on it, he sits too far forward, like he’s making space for someone behind him. But there’s no one there. There’s never anyone there.

The jetski, he decides, was the start of his problems. Maybe if he... If he...

Storming back into the house, he leaves what’s left of his coffee in the sink and the newspaper forgotten on the counter, and hurries into the office. He rips off a long sheet of dot matrix printer paper. Biting off the cap of his pen, he scribbles on it in large block letters, all caps, FOR SALE.

Back in the driveway, he removes the chocks from behind the wheels of the trailer, and flips off the tarp. He wheels the trailer and the jetski to the end of the driveway, right up against the road.

He must look like a mad man, out there in his brown button-up pajamas and coffee-stained slippers. The neighbor’s mowing the lawn. The dog’s barking further away. Everything’s perfect in this perfect little neighborhood, this perfect little life. But he feels like he is going insane.

He slaps the for sale sign on the front of the jetski, and starts back for the house. The sooner that thing is out of his life... Maybe... Maybe things would go back to normal.

His heart pangs in a way he doesn’t understand. Heartache. So much heartache. Why?

Does he even want normal?

But if not that, then what? What is he missing?

He’s at his front door, hand on the doorknob, when someone politely coughs behind him. He pauses a moment, there’s no way someone is there... But when he glances over his shoulder - yeah. Someone’s behind him, only a few feet away.

Not just someone. The most gorgeous person he has ever seen, wearing a sleek black suit and a pair of sunglasses. Long dark hair is slicked back and pushed behind their ears.

He should probably feel self-conscious, standing there in his brown pajamas in front of this god of a person - probably a model - but he doesn’t. Strangely, he feels more at ease now than he has in weeks. His whole body relaxes like he finally exhaled a held breath.

But that doesn’t make sense. They’ve never met. He would remember.

He would never forget a face like that.

“Hello,” the person says, and the word tremors slightly.

“Hello.” It tremors when he says it too.

There’s no car on the road. No bicycle on the sidewalk. However this person got here, it’s like they dropped down from the sky.

The person clears their throat. “You’re selling the jetski?”

“You...” He blinks. He knew jetskis were popular - hell, they are the best - but he hadn’t expected an offer before he even got his pants on. “Yeah. You interested?”

“Yes, I...” They drop their head a moment, taking their time to think. When they lift their head again, their shoulders lift too, like they are preparing for a battle.

He supposes negotiations can be seen as a battle, but he can’t bring himself to match the person’s pose. He’s ready to give up the jetski for free at this point. Whatever gets it gone.

The person asks, “What’s wrong with it?”

“Nothing’s wrong with it. It runs like a dream.”

“Then why get rid of it?”

His heart hurts, so he laughs through the pain. It’s silly, but he can’t help feel his sister was right. This person wouldn’t know either way, so he finds himself telling them, “I’m heartbroken.”

The person goes very still. Their mouth opens and they take in a shaky, noisy breath. When they say, “What?” the word is bone dry and crumbling.

“It’s something we did together... I think.” He’s making it up, but it feels right. So he keeps talking. “And now. Well. It kinda reminds me of... I’m pretty sure I forgot a lot of things, but I can’t forget that. There’s supposed to be someone else. And I can’t... I can’t...”

He’s not making any sense, but the person is hanging on every single word.

“Anyway,” he says. “I’ll let it go cheap. Too many memories... or... I don’t know, feelings?” He sighs. “Just make me an offer, okay? I have to get ready for work.”

He wants nothing more than to keep this beautiful person on his doorstep, but... well, life isn’t always about getting what you want. This person wants a jetski, he has one. A transaction will occur, and this person will move forward like he never existed.

He’ll be left behind again.

Again?

Now, he’s the one to stand a little straighter. “Do you ever get deja vu?”

“Deja vu?”

“You know, where you feel like you’ve lived an exact moment already, once before. I’ve been reading this book about mobius strips and...” There’s that pang again, in his chest. A subtle ache that is swelling. He wants to ignore it, like he always has, but he’s finding he can’t really anymore. “Don’t you think that’d be a cool name? Mobius. Mobius M. Mobius.” He laughs, and it hurts. It hurts.

The person doesn’t laugh. Instead, they take a small step back. “I shouldn’t have come here.”

His laughter dies quickly. It wasn’t real anyway. “You don’t want the jetski?”

“I do,” the person says with naked longing. “More than anything.”

“Then its yours.” He shrugs. “You know, it kinda feels like it was already yours? Like, maybe its just been waiting around for you to show up and claim it.”

The person shakes their head. “It’s better off without me. It finally has a chance to... to... live the way you - it deserves...”

“I mean, that’s a nice thought. But in practice... wouldn’t it be better for jetskis to decide for themselves the kind of lives they want? Whose to say that their life before was all that great? Because let me tell you, this perfect little normal life I’m living? Kinda sucks.” He doesn’t really understand what he’s saying, but the words still fall out of him, like ripping a scab off an old wound and all the blood starts running again.

The person takes another step back, but this time, he follows, taking a step forward. Somehow, it feels crucial that he not let this person leave him behind again.

There, another again. What is he not remembering?

“There’s something terribly wrong with all this,” he says. “I’m forgetting something important, but whatever it is - whoever - I don’t think I can be happy without them. Not really. Not in any way that matters.”

“Mobius...” the person says, soft, under their breath. Stronger, “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

And the dam breaks.

“I know exactly what I’m saying, Loki.” The name, that name. How could he forget that name?

The person - Loki - exhales again, watery this time.

“Maybe if we never met, this would be enough. Maybe it was once. But not anymore. Never again. Not since you. And not even your little mind hocus pocus could change that.”

Mobius takes another step forward. This time, Loki does not move back. They stay just as they are and let Mobius close the distance. Mobius lifts his hands to Loki’s face and slowly removes those sunglasses. Loki’s eyes have always been the most expressive - the easiest to read. No wonder they would try to hide them. Because now they shine with sorrow and regret and... love. So much love.

And that, Mobius knows, is exactly what he’s been looking for when he reaches out to the empty space beside him on the bed. When he sits in his kitchen and stares at the pulled-out chair across the table. When he rides his jetski and turns, ready to laugh with the missing person behind him.

“I’m not angry,” Mobius says, tossing the sunglasses aside. He takes one of Loki’s hands in his. Loki grips hard onto his fingers. “I understand why you did it. It’s kind of flattering really, to know you’d give up your own happiness to try to give me mine. But there was a very big problem with this latest Loki scheme.”

“What’s that?” Loki asks in a whisper.

Mobius gives them a smile. The first real one since they parted. “You’re unforgettable.”

Loki laughs once, a burst, like they’ve been holding something in and now its escaping. The hard lines of their face smooth out. And they look less like a frightened, broken shadow and more like themselves, god of mischief, with a small but growing smirk. “Of course. I suppose I should have considered that.”

“Big flaw. Ruined the whole thing, to be honest.”

Loki leans closer. “I hate to admit to fault, but I fear there was a second issue that I had not considered.”

“Oh, yeah? What’s that?”

“Your absolute stubbornness.”

“Stubborn? Me? You should look in the mirror, pal.”

Loki closes their eyes a moment. Mobius studies the planes of their perfect face, and wonders how, in all the infinite timelines, he ever forgot it. 

“Loki,” Mobius says. “Do me a favor, though, huh? Don’t do this again. I... uh, well. It wasn’t the most fun for me.”

“Me, either.” Loki presses their forehead to Mobius’s. “I regretted every moment, but I... The TVA stole you from your life. I wanted to -”

“I know, I get it. I’m not mad. But communication is key to a relationship, yeah? So maybe next time you want to do a grand gesture of love for me, we should talk about it first?”

Loki leans back. They blink. But it’s not the love that trips them up, it’s, “Relationship?”

Mobius runs his hands along Loki’s arms, up to the shoulders and back down to the elbows. “Yeah. I mean, we’re partners, right?”

“Partners.” Loki doesn’t say the word with disgust, more... intrigue.

“Boyfriends?” Mobius tries.

“Boyfriends.” Loki frowns at that one.

“Lovers?”

Loki’s eyes are bright and full of wonder. How they could look at Mobius, someone so normal, like that... well. Loki makes Mobius feel like a god himself, no wonder he couldn’t go back to his old life.

“Lovers,” Loki says and kisses Mobius. Mobius smiles against their lips. Lovers, it is, then.

Kiss turns to kisses, and they linger. It’s right, so right that it further amplifies how wrong everything else was before. Mobius belongs here. Right here. With Loki. Forever, if possible.

When they break, they both laugh, and it’s light and true this time, for both of them.

“Hey, Loki,” Mobius says. “Want to buy a jetski?”

Loki pulls an annoyed face, but its all an act - Mobius sees right through it, and Loki’s not trying that hard to hide it. “I believe I’m the one who acquired that jetski for you. You have no right to sell it.”

“It was a gift,” Mobius says.

“It remains a gift. One I insist you keep.”

“Alright, alright,” Mobius laughs and Loki kisses him at the corner of his smile. “But only if you promise to keep me.”

“Oh, dear Mobius.” Loki brings their mouth to Mobius’s ear. “I hope you appreciated this display of selflessness, because I will not be repeating it.”

“Good.”

“I am a selfish god.”

“Uh, huh.”

Loki’s arms grip tightly around Mobius’s waist. “And from here to eternity, I will be keeping what’s mine.”

The last remaining knots in Mobius’s chest untangle. “And the jetski.”

“And the jetski,” Loki says and kisses him again.

[mishacollinsthighsss]

Pairing: Dean Winchester/Castiel

Warnings: mention of Dean's death, mention of Castiel's death (but it's mostly just pure fluff, I promise)

Post 15x20, Fix-It-Fic (kinda)

Happy Supernatural day guys, I thought a little Destiel fix-it would be fitting for this day 💙

Not beta'd, all mistakes are my own

"Cas, you stupid son of a bitch! Do you hear me? That's what you are, alright?"

Dean looked up into the sky above him - which, now that he thought about it wasn't actually the sky, but who knew what was real in heaven and what wasn't. He had been driving around for a month now - maybe it had been just two weeks? - Dean didn't know, but what he knew was that he was praying to the stupid angel in a trenchcoat, without success. He'd thought that after everything that had happened, Cas would be happy to see him, would come to greet him the second he arrived here, but nothing.

"Damnit Cas, I know you can hear me!"

The former hunter was standing at the foot of a mountain, surrounded by nothing but trees, flowers, and bees. He didn't even notice how far he'd walked, but when he let his gaze wander, he realized that the meadow was huge. He felt an ache in his heart all of a sudden, because he knew that this, right here, would be one of Cas' favorite places.

His anger grew all of a sudden, but at the same time, his eyes filled with tears and he sat down on the ground, leaning against a solid tree.

"Listen, I know that - that things aren't that fancy between us right now, but I - I wanna... God, move your ass here, Cas!"

His voice got louder and louder, until he could hear it echoing back from... somewhere. Dean had no idea, but he didn't care. He was exhausted, even though he didn't need to sleep up here, but he knew exactly that it wasn't that kind of exhaustion, no, it was the emotional kind.

For what had felt like forever, he was searching for Cas, trying to reach him somehow, starting right after he realized that he loved the goddamn angel as well, but until now, there was not a single sign of him.

"Please man, I need you. We need - we need to talk."

His voice cracked at the last word and the first tear found its way down his cheek, but he wiped it away quickly. His head dropped back then against the tree with a sigh, and he closed his eyes.

"You realize that you can't hide forever, right? Come on, whatever the reason is, we'll figure it out, we'll figure everything out. Cas, please."

His eyes were still closed, and suddenly, there was a light breeze at the meadow, making the trees rustle a little.

"Hello, Dean."

Dean's head snapped up while he tore his eyes open, and for a second, he felt too dizzy to see anything. When his eyes got used to the light again though, he was looking right at Cas'...

His eyes snapped up so fast that once again, he got hit by a wave of dizziness, while his cheeks got hot in an instant.

"Jesus, you could've showed up next to me, or behind me, or... or..."

Just then, the former hunter realized that it was actually Cas standing right in front of him, and just like that, his heart was up his throat, while at the same time, his stomach seemed to tie itself in knots. It was Cas, his Cas who he was searching for a month, standing right in front of him like nothing had happened.

He jumped up, not sure what he was about to say, but all of a sudden, he was furious.

"Hello? That's all you have to say?"

His voice was shaking, and his hands automatically clenched into fists, while he tried to control himself not to punch the angel right into his stupid, beautiful face.

"Yes."

Cas' expression was blank, and Dean huffed an angry laugh, while he turned to bring some space between them. When he took a few steps, he didn't turn around again, because his eyes were burning with unshed tears, and as much as Dean was thinking about this moment, prepared for it, even, he couldn't say what he wanted to say, not now, not like this.

"Do you have any idea how long I've been searching for you?" the hunter asked, his voice quiet.

"I'm aware, yes," Castiel answered, and Dean had to close his eyes. He'd been thinking about this moment for almost two months now, the whole time on earth and in heaven, and this wasn't how he'd thought it would go. It wasn't even close.

"Then why? Why did you make me wait?"

It was a desperate question, Dean's voice full of emotions, he could hear it, but he couldn't stop it. It took him some time to become like this, to not hide his feelings anymore, and he wouldn't be ashamed of it now.

"I could sense your anger, Dean. I thought that -"

"Well, next time stop thinking buddy, and do what I ask you for."

Dean knew it sounded selfish, and again, a little desperate, but he couldn't stop himself. Slowly, he turned around, his head lowered to hide his tears at first, but after he took a deep breath, he raised it slowly to look at Cas.

"You have any idea how much I've missed you, you son of a bitch?" he whispered, while he slowly approached the angel, one small step after another. Castiel's eyes went wide for a second, before his expression went completely blank again, but even though he tried to hide it, Dean noticed the small gulp anyway.

"You have any idea how I felt when you left? When you dumped all that shit on me, not even caring about what I'd have to say, and then you just disappeared? You have any idea how that made me feel?"

Dean's voice got louder and louder, and at the end, he was almost yelling, his voice echoing from the mountains, and for the first time since Cas' confession, he understood what the angel had said.

'You think that hate and anger, that's what drives you, that's who you are. It's not!'

No, what he was feeling wasn't anger. He wasn't angry at Cas. He was desperate, and heartbroken, and confused, but not angry. Slowly, the former hunter took a deep breath, his gaze locked with Cas' the whole time.

"You think I'm a rock? That you could just dump that on me and leave, and that I'd be okay with that?"

Dean took another step closer, then one more, until their faces were only inches apart. The angel lowered his head in shame, but not a single word came out of his mouth. When his ears turned into a dark share of red, Dean almost smiled through his tears.

"You think I'm okay without my best friend by my side?" Dean whispered, while he pushed Cas' head back up, using his index finger.

"Cas, say something," he begged, almost desperate, because even though Dean had learned to deal with his shit by now, he still couldn't stand it to get no answer when he was being vulnerable in front of anybody.

"I'm sorry," Cas whispered, while he lifted his head all the way to look into Dean's eyes. The former hunter could see tears glistening in Castiel's eyes as well, and just with one look, he knew that the angel was sincere.

"Just don't... don't ever do shit like that again, alright?" Dean mumbled, before he grabbed the angel by the shoulders and pulled him into a hug, so tight that breathing got hard after some seconds, but Dean didn't care, because first of all, he was dead already, and second, he'd die for this, for Cas, just like Cas had died for him.

After some moments, Castiel hesitantly lifted his arms as well and wrapped his arms around Dean's lower back, which made the former hunter sigh. His eyes fell shut and he had a hard time resisting the urge to bury his face at the other man's neck, but somehow, he did it. Just when he was about to let go, he could feel a sharp pain at the back of his head, accompanied by a loud slapping sound. Dean jumped back, eyes wide, and stared at Cas in disbelief.

"That," Cas said, the smallest of smiles on his lips, "was for dying right after I sacrificed myself for you to live. You can thank Charlie for showing me this."

Dean raised his hand and rubbed the spot that was throbbing a little now, and he was more than aware that in heaven, he wasn't supposed to feel any pain, except of when he wanted to.

"That's... that's fair," he mumbled, and his cheeks turned pink, while the corner of his mouth lifted a little.

"Yeah, I think I deserve that."

He wasn't sure if Cas knew how he died, or why, but if he did, he wasn't showing it. No, if he'd know, he wouldn't grin like that now, Dean was sure, and for some reason, he was more relieved about that than he thought he'd be.

"Listen, there's... there's something else we need to talk about," he mumbled suddenly, and his smile disappeared immediately, just like Castiel's.

"If you mean what happened on earth -"

"No, you shut your mouth and let me talk, you had your moment already."

There was no heat behind Dean's words, but Cas' mouth snapped shut anyway. Suddenly, there was a light breeze ghosting over the meadow, and Dean felt the urge to turn around, so he did, blaming it on his still very present hunter instincts. He was almost sure to see someone behind them, Jack maybe, or anyone else who wanted to see Dean, but what was there instead took his breath away.

Right there, just a few feet behind them, was a huge barn, but not any barn, no, the barn they'd met all those years ago. The light changed as well, and suddenly, it was dark, the only light given by at least a thousand fireflies, quietly flying around the barn.

"Friggin' heaven," he mumbled and his face turned into a dark shade of red, because even though he was denying it all the time, he knew this was his work - he was a fucking sap.

When he turned his head again to look at Cas, the angel's eyes were wide, staring in awe at the spectacle in front of his, his lips slightly parted.

"Dean..."

"Not a word. Listen, there's... there's some stuff I wanna say as well," Dean said, his voice more firm that he'd thought, but he cleared his throat anyway before he began to speak.

"First of all, I'm still mad at you for what you did back there, alright? And I will be, probably for a long time. But..."

The former hunter searched Castiel's gaze, and only when their eyes locked, he continued.

"But even though I was - or am - mad, that doesn't mean I didn't miss you like crazy. Do you have any idea how fuckin' thrilled I was when I came here and Bobby told me you're around as well? And how - how disappointed I was when you didn't show up?"

"Dean, I didn't mean to -"

"No, shut up, man. I already told you, you had your moment."

Dean waited for an answer, but Cas was just standing there, staring at him, without saying another word. He shoved his hands into his jeans pockets, but when his fingers hit something that hadn't been in there before, he furrowed his brows. Slowly, he tried to make out what it was. It was something small, a little box, maybe? It was soft and -

Oh. Oh no. Definitely no. This couldn't be, this-

"Dean?"

Dean's eyes snapped back to Cas, and just then he noticed that he'd had lowered his head. The angel stared at him with his brows furrowed and his head tilted to the side, and Dean's heart jumped by the sight.

'Why not?' a voice was whispering in his head all of a sudden, and he knew it was right? Why the hell not, right? It's not like he'd suddenly die, he already was dead. Go big or go home.

"Yeah, I'm, uh... let's walk a little, alright?"

Dean tilted his head into the direction of the barn and started walking, and Cas followed him immediately. As soon as they were side by side, their arms touching just a little, like they'd always done when he was still alive, Dean started talking again.

"So... I have one question. Did you mean it? What you said, I mean, the - the love part."

The former hunter was too afraid to look at Castiel, so he kept his gaze at his feet, watching every of his own steps carefully. He knew Cas had meant it, but he still needed to ask, just to make sure.

"Of course I meant it, Dean."

Again, Dean's heart jumped and he had to take a few deep breaths to calm it down. They walked around the barn until they reached the entrance door, which was closed, and that's when Dean stopped. He took another deep breath and lifted his gaze, about to start talking again, but as soon as their eyes locked, he couldn't get a word out. Instead, he lifted his hand, which was shaking a little, slowly, almost like he could break Cas if he wasn't careful. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think anymore, his whole body worked on its own. As soon as his fingertips touched the other man's cheek, careful, soft, he exhaled.

He wanted to say so much, wanted to tell the angel that he loved him, that what he did was stupid, that he could have what he wanted, but his mouth didn't work.

Cas' eyes went wide by Dean's touch, but not even a second later, he leaned closer to Dean's hand, and Dean cupped his cheek fully. Somehow, they got closer and closer, and now their noses were almost touching, Dean could feel Castiel's breath on his own lips. Out of reflex, his tongue flicked out to wet them, and Cas' gaze dropped down, just for a split second, but he didn't move.

"You stupid son of a bitch," Dean whispered, his eyes full of tears once again, before he closed the distance and pressed his lips against Castiel's. Their mouths were closed, it was a soft, tender kiss, almost a little shy, but feeling Cas' lips on his own for the first time was enough to drive Dean crazy. His eyes fell shut, which caused some tears to roll down his cheeks, but he didn't even notice, he was too focused on the other man.

Cas gasped when their lips met, and at first, he was frozen in place, but when Dean started to move his lips, slowly, to give the angel time to proceed what was happening, Cas hesitantly put his hands on Dean's waist and pulled him closer. Dean whimpered and he knew he'd deny it later, but he stepped even closer, until their bodies were pressed together from head to toe.

They were standing there for minutes, hours, days, hell, it could've been weeks, according to how time worked in heaven, but when they finally separated, Cas was looking at him with such awe in his eyes that Dean had to lower his head.

"You could've just asked, you know? I know - I know I wasn't easy to be around, but... to think that this is something you couldn't have, that was just stupid."

Huh, his voice sounded way too deep. Cas didn't say a word, didn't even breathe, and as the seconds ticked by, Dean got a little worried. Slowly, he looked up, just to see Cas still standing there like before, his eyes wide, his mouth slightly opened, his cheeks flushed. He was beautiful.

"I love you too, Cas," Dean said, his voice quiet, because he didn't know what else to say. Then, just like that, Cas' eyes filled with tears in mere seconds, and the liquid slowly ran down his cheeks as soon as he began to smile. The smile quickly turned into a grin, and Dean couldn't resist to smile as well. For some reason, they both started laughing, at the same time, and they laughed so hard that their bellies started to hurt.

When they finally calmed down a little, Dean took Cas' hand and took a few deep breaths.

"We're both a couple of dumbasses, huh?" he mumbled, his mind once again wandering back to the small box that was still hiding in his pocket.

"Dean, I -"

"I'm not done yet," Dean said with a grin, which felt a little off, because he was nervous as hell all of a sudden. With his free hand, he pulled out the little box, still hiding it in his fist, and started talking once more.

"So uh... I know that I'm - well, dead, and you're an angel, and heaven is a fucking traitor, but uh... would you... wear that? It's - it's not - I mean, marriage is a bit useless up here, but -"

The former hunter wasn't sure how to finish, so he just closed his mouth and lifted his hand with the little box. As soon as he opened it, he couldn't hold back a little chuckle. What was inside was a ring, a silver ring to be more specific, but there was one blue line, going around the silver all the way in little waves. Dean remembered how he'd seen this ring once, and even back then, his mind had jumped to Castiel immediately, because the blue was the exact same color as the angel's eyes.

Cas' eyes went wide once again and he lifted his hand to touch the ring carefully. Silence stretched between them, and just when Dean started to think this had been a bad idea, Cas sobbed, just once, before he wrapped his arms around the former hunters neck and squeezed tightly.

"It'd be an honor to wear that ring, Dean," he whispered, right next to Dean's ear, and Dean breathed out, just then realizing that he'd been holding his breath. When Cas pulled back from the hug, Dean took his hand once again and slid the ring on his finger, before he intertwined their hands with a smile.

"I know that - that there's a lot to talk about still, but could we just... dunno, enjoy the night? Or... day, or evening, or... whatever..." Dean asked when he looked around. The light had changed once again, and instead of the barn, there was a small house, just big enough for two people to comfortably live in. Nearby was a little lake, surrounded by trees. The meadow was still there, but there was also a road now, close to the house. And a white picket fence. A fucking white picket fence. Dean's face turned red in an instant.

"Is this where you want to live from now on?" Cas asked while looking around, not even noticing Dean's embarrassment.

"Seems like it is," Dean shot back, his voice a little more grumpy than usual.

"It's beautiful," Cas answered, before he looked at Dean again, his face turning serious.

"Do you want to... live alon-"

"God, Cas, are you fucking kidding me? Don't even think about leaving me again or I'll find you just to stab you."

"Wouldn't be the first time," Cas mumbled, but there was a huge, loving smile on his face, and Dean couldn't do anything else than to smile back.

"Let's get inside then," Cas said and squeezed Dean's hand, and the former hunter nodded and followed quickly. Cas was back, finally, and Dean wasn't a coward for once. He'd been honest about his feelings, and for the first time in his life, there was nothing that could destroy his happiness. No monster, no sudden death, nothing. It was just Cas and him. Cas, angel of the lord, soldier of God, who loved him. Him, just a human, a tiny, little human. Dean couldn't believe his luck. He followed Cas inside the house, and when he turned around to close the door, he exhaled. This was heaven, right here, with Cas, the man he loved. Finally, he was at peace. Finally, he was home.

Tag list: @sam--ships--it @green-blue-heller @professorerudite @foolsdreamhigh @jmjlover @spnmrvlshrlck @melly-the-crazy-coconut @thebluelynxx @lulu-zodiac @bigartpuppy @charliesfandomlife

Let me know if you wanna be added/removed 💙

[shootingstarwritings]

Eight Pleas on a Starry Night

Eight Cups a Day

Eight Memories a Minute

All that this creature knew from the moment of its "birth," was to consume. The moment it first began to understand "itself" and "the world," it absorbed whatever was in front of it. Just as babes from the womb yearn for their mother's womb, these slimes feast upon segments of their host's brains. There was no thought and no malice behind; instead, it was pure instinct. Consume and assimilate as much as the host's brain would allow until complete takeover.

The moment this creature, now male due to his host, opened his eyes, he saw the sight of another looking at him with emotion the creature couldn't quite understand just yet. However, through pure instinct and the slight connection they shared as a species, he knew that this was his brother. “Ah, hello,” he greeted with pure innocence.

“H-Hey,” his brother responded, sounding not unlike the people the creature saw in his host’s memories. How skillful was he at hiding amongst these humans? “D-Do you know who I am? Do you know who you are? What’s your name?” Now, he spoke aggressively, but alongside another set of emotions.

Not wanting to disappoint his brother, the creature said, “I do not recall,” with complete assurance. “I seem to be quite adept at assimilating my host’s memories, unfortunately. It looks as though I cannot be a unit that can infiltrate any of these people.”

His brother shut his eyes, as though he had swallowed something harsh, before saying, “You are Nolan. Your name is Nolan.”

“Nolan. Understood.”

“And I’m F-Forde. My name is Forde.” Forde took a deep breath, his hand brushing up against Nolan’s. Then, he intertwined their fingers together. “Do you really not remember me? When we looked at the stars together?"

Nolan shook his head. “Am I supposed to? I am sorry if I am not up to your standards, brother.” Squeezing Forde’s hand—was it his host’s natural response?—Nolan said, “I will do better in the future. Do not worry.”

Forde nodded as he drew his hand back to his chest. There was an emotion on Forde’s face that Nolan did not recognize, so he ignored it.

The creature inside of Alan stared up at the summer night. He had a fleeting thought of the few stars that shined despite the town's light pollution and wondered if that was where he and his kin came from. However, he quickly dismissed that line of thought. It was not important for their invasion, so it was unnecessary. He was reeling from these useless thoughts that continued to plague him ever since the day he emerged from the sea.

Most of his brothers had perished when he had managed to infect Forde. He could only convert one person and implant his sole offspring before his brothers, unable to speak to him and cry for help, dried up. All he could do now was ignore any sort of sentimentalism that burdened him and press on forward.

“I am an invader,” the invader said to himself, floating naked on the surface of the pool. “Then, why do I have these regrets?”

Regret was a sentiment that his host, Alan, was familiar with. Words left unsaid, arguments he couldn't take back, and a life that was snuffed due to a misunderstanding. The list was long but also faded. By now, the invader had engulfed most of Alan's memories, so there was very little he could recall with any clarity. All he could see was a series of faded images.

It mattered little, the invader decided. The lingering feelings didn’t matter. All that was important was to breed and infect. That was the final purpose they had.

“Alan, there’s someone at the door.”

Ah, that was unexpected. Alan swam to the edge of the pool and pulled himself out. “Do you know who it is, brother?”

He nodded. “It’s your friend—or rather, it’s your host’s friend,” said Forde. “He texted you, and I responded, and one thing left to another...” he said, nonchalantly while pointing his thumb to the front of the house. “And now he’s here. You gonna…?”

“I’ll have to infect him,” said the invader as he dried himself off. “There’s nothing else that can be done.”

“Right, well Nolan is by the door if you need any assistance.”

The invader raised an eyebrow. “Will you not help me?”

“I'm sorta tired if we're being honest. Maybe some other time?" Forde said with a shrug and a grin.

The invader narrowed his eyes but didn't say anything in response. He walked past Forde, but stopped right before crossing the doorway. “You are my offspring, and yet you are so different from your brother and myself. Why is that?” There was far too much personality, whether from the host or from the possessor itself. It was odd.

Forde’s gaze grew distant. “I wonder why myself,” he muttered. “But never mind that. Your friend’s in the front, and Nolan’s in position to help you infect him.”

“And your family? The ones who own this home?”

“Won’t be back until Monday. We’ve got plenty of time.”

The invader had suspicions rise, but he pushed them to the back of his mind. There were more pressing matters to attend to. “Please, watch over your siblings.” The invader didn’t wait for a response. He processed the information carefully and he dried off and dressed.

“Alan, hey!” Forde was right. A friend of Alan, a great deal younger—about middle-aged—stood in front of the doorway. The invader could not access much of Alan's memories, so the man was a stranger to him. However, he was knowledgeable enough to recognize the glint in the man's eyes.

“Thank you for coming.”

“Came as soon as I could,” the man said, smiling brightly as he spoke to Alan. “Said you needed my help? Say, what’s this place anyway? How come you’re here?” With narrowed eyes, the man leaned in and whispered, “Ain’t that kid a li’l too young for you? Seems kinda weird if you ask me.”

Alan shook his head. “He’s a family friend. Said he needed help moving a couch. Could you help me?”

The suspicion in the man’s eyes cleared, and he eagerly nodded. “Sure! I’ll give you hand. Lead the way.”

[LINE BREAK]

Forde was panting by the time he entered the house again. What he walked into didn’t surprise him, but he still had to fight the urge to gag.

“Hello, nngg, Forde!” Nolan greeted him as he fucked Alan’s convulsing friend. “This one has almost finished his conversion. Would you like to assist me?"

“I think I’ll pass,” Forde said, grimacing. His eyes lingered on the man before turning over to the sleeping Alan on the couch. “Alan’s asleep?”

“Yes, mmm. He-fuck—s-said creating so many offspring has left him exhausted. Will probably sleep until the party tomorrow.”

The party…

Forde took a deep breath, trying to calm his breathing. “Nolan, when you’re… finished, meet me in my room, all right?”

“Which—“

“The one closest to the bathroom. You can’t miss it.”

“Right."

Forde lied back on his bed, attempting to erase the image of Nolan happily plowing another man’s ass out of his head. There was no doubt that what he had seen was the truth, but it carried such wrongness to it that he couldn’t help to wind back to it. Nothing about Nolan seemed to have remained. The chipper friendliness and eagerness to please was something that would have disgusted Nolan and now it disgusted Forde. Not even the memories were there. At most, the one possessing Nolan could remember some family members, last name, and his street address.

Everything else, including that night under the stars, was gone.

“Is this my punishment?” asked Forde, unsure if God would answer the pleas of a parasite. “Is this what I deserve for killing Forde?" That sin would remain with him for the rest of his life. It didn't matter if he believed he was Forde and inherited the name, the body, and the memories, the original was gone. If Forde ever left this body, it would remain a hollow husk. The organs would function, but there would be no brain activity. It would be no different than a vegetable.

Yet, Forde could not deny his greedy nature—as a parasite and a man. I still want to be happy, he thought. God, Alan, and the world itself can shame and hate me for it, but I still want to live a happy life. He knew how shameless that desire was, but did not care. The pain and pleasure that he has known in his short time as a human only stroked the hungry flames that burned in his heart.

The door opened, and Nolan walked in, still naked. “I am here, brother,” he announced, as though it wasn’t obvious.

Forde drew the sheets back and scooted to the side of the bed. “Close the door, and lie with me.”

“Hmm? Will we be sleeping on the same bed?”

“Yeah. Keep me company for tonight, will ya?”

“I see no reason to decline.” Without any shame, Nolan lied right next Forde. Their bare shoulders were touching, but only one of them understood the implications,

“Nolan, do you remember what happened when we went camping that night?”

“I do not.”

“Yeah, I figured,” said Forde, preparing himself. His hand was trembling, and he was sweating all over. Why couldn’t he calm himself? “Could you… Could you do me a favor, br-brother…?” When Nolan said yes, Forde nearly sobbed. After a deep, uneven breath, he said, “Please, gather yourself in your host’s mouth. I have to show you something.”

Unquestionably, Nolan did so. He opened his mouth, the blue slime lying on top of his tongue. Even in that form, he looked completely innocent.

Forde ripped over the packet of salt and poured it on his own tongue, cringing from the taste. Then, he leaned over and kissed Nolan’s lips before swiftly drawing back, the aftertaste of the salt lingering in his now empty mouth. The effect was immediate.

Nolan’s body began to violently convulse. “Wh-What did you d-do?!” Nolan cried out, spitting out the salt and now bits of foam. “Br-Brother?!” His eyes rolled to the back of his head and spat out more and more foam—the remains of his desiccated body. Forde shut his eyes and covered his ears.

Just like snails and slugs, their species would dry out when their real forms were exposed to concentrated amounts of salt due to osmosis. Even though they originated from the ocean, the intense amount of salt would still kill them. It only due to Forde’s biology degree that he could figure that out. And because of that, he knew that there was a chance Alan didn’t know that, either. This was his only weapon… the only thing he had to stop the invasion.

And yet…

Forde jumped as Nolan grabbed his arm in desperation. He opened his eyes and the image burned itself into his memory. He was dying. Nolan, the slime, whatever, was dying. Because of him. Because of what Forde did. He’s just a parasite, a murderer, Forde kept thinking as the convulsing began to cease. “I had to, I had to...” he kept muttering to himself, even as tears trailed down his cheeks.

He was a murderer just like me.

Now, he was staring at Nolan’s still-breathing body. There was no life in his eyes, but his chest still rose and fell, and his mouth was still agape. The slime, his brother, was gone. And Nolan was gone too. Two more lives that Forde had snuffed out, and tomorrow he would have to do it again.

He tried to smile. “Nolan...” he said, embracing the brain-dead husk. “Nolan, Nolan… Nolan… I love you,” he said, caressing Nolan’s unmoving face. “I saved you, I did it… you’re okay now.” Forde pressed his face on Nolan’s left pectoral. His heart continued to beat despite how empty it was. “You’re free, you’re okay. I k-killed the parasite, I did it for you…! So, you’ll forgive me, right?” There was no response, no matter how much Forde pleaded. However, he continued. "Please, please tell me you'll forgive me. You and Forde will forgive me, right? Please, please, for the love of God, please help me...”

Neither God nor Nolan answered him that night.

[fific7]

Dangerous and Divine - Part 20

Billy Russo x Reader

Summary: Billy Russo is an itch you don’t want to scratch. But he’s all over you like a rash.

A/N: This does not follow canon, it’s mainly fluff & lemon zest 🍋 Hopefully you’ve guessed by now that is my “Billy Russo Deserves Real Love AU” as I totally refuse to accept what happened in S2! The GIF is from Exposed, unreleased pilot show in case you’re wondering 😌... Billy vibes.

Warnings: 18+ NSFW due to sexual content including unprotected* sex between consenting adults. Some drinking & swearing.

*Irl, please don’t go wild in the country without protection.

(My GIF)

You’d just realised that - despite his little caveman episode earlier on - you didn’t ever want any man except Billy in your life.

Still gazing into his dark chocolate eyes, you heard yourself saying, “I think I’ll have that ring, please.”

You really wished you’d had your phone in your hand to take a photo of Billy’s face, because it was what they call ‘a picture’.

Never had you seen his mouth drop open so wide. He gaped at you for what felt like minutes, until he stuttered, “Th... the ring???” You nodded, “Yeah.”

He grabbed your hand and stood up, moving quickly out of the booth and dragging you along with him. Glancing at the waitress, who was looking very surprised, he said happily, “Sorry, miss. We’re gonna have to leave. Sorry ‘bout that.” She shrugged and turned away as Billy rushed to the door, you in tow.

Once outside you huffed, “Billy! Slow down! And what about lunch?!” “Nah, nah, nah. Lunch’s gonna have to wait!” “But I’m starving!” “Angel, I’ll get you lunch soon, I promise ya. Right now? I need to get you back to the apartment. Get that ring on your finger ‘fore you change your mind!”

He continued moving along the sidewalk at speed, gripping your hand tightly almost like he thought you’d try to get away. You were beginning to pant slightly as he was going at such a rate, his long legs eating up the sidewalk, and you laughed breathlessly, “Seriously, Billy, slow down!” He dropped back ever so slightly, “Nearly there, angel,” he grinned at you.

Eventually you arrived back at his apartment, Billy throwing open the door and then slamming it behind the two of you. Just as well he doesn’t have neighbours up here, you thought, otherwise they wouldn’t be very happy.

The next second, Billy’s mouth was on yours in a fiery kiss. He broke away, “Wait there, wait there!” He almost bounced over to the kitchen table and grabbed the ring box. Meanwhile, you were smiling at his goofy schoolboyish enthusiasm. Then he was back in front of you and dropping to one knee again, but this time looking happy as a clam. The ring box was held up towards you, open on this occasion, and its occupant sparkled at you as it caught the light.

A bit out of breath, he said your name in a serious tone before continuing, “....I’ve said all this to you before, but I’ll say it over and over again. As many times as you need me to say it. I want you in my life.... I’ll always want you in my life, angel. I love you so much it hurts, and I can’t be without you.” The dark eyes stared intently into yours, “Will you marry me? Please?”

This time you reached out and stroked the hand which was holding the ring box, “Yes, Billy.... I will.”

The smile which appeared on his face would’ve put the sun to shame. He leapt up, fumbling a bit as he took the ring out of the box, taking hold of your hand and sliding it onto your waiting finger. It fitted perfectly. How’d he manage that? you thought.

But when you met Billy’s eyes they were full of tears. You immediately reached up and stroked his face, “Billy.... you’re crying.” He sucked in a big breath and wiped a hand across his eyes, pulling you into his arms and just holding you close.

“Thank you,” he whispered next to your ear. “I really hope you don’t feel like I pressurised you into this, angel. It means so much to me that you said yes. But just ‘cause I wanted it so bad doesn’t mean I ignored what you said before. Hey, we can still get to know each other while you’re wearin’ that ring on your finger. I just wanted something that said to the world you’re mine.”

“Big sap,” you smiled against his chest. He chuckled, “Yeah, I’ve already admitted I am,” before tipping your chin up with one long finger. His lips hovered over yours, “You’re my fiancée now.” You nodded, “Yes I am.” His mouth gently met yours and he kissed you... softly, slowly, with love.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After a prolonged and passionate kissing session on Billy’s sofa, you two finally made it back out for lunch. Which mightily pleased you, as you were absolutely starving by now. Billy had your hand in his and he was happily swinging both your arm and his backwards and forwards as you two walked back to the same diner you’d been in earlier.

He’d asked if you wanted to go elsewhere, but you just couldn’t face going even a little bit further away - you were sure you’d faint from hunger if you did.

The same waitress looked round from where she was leaning on the counter as you and Billy went back in, and tracked you over to the same booth you’d occupied before. Whipping out her notepad and pen, she was once again drinking in Billy with her eyes and ignoring you so a bit pettily, you picked up the menu with a flourish so that the diamonds in your ring flashed as they caught the light.

Her eyes were drawn to it - as you’d expected them to be - and widened quite noticeably. Billy was smirking at you, as he knew exactly what you were doing. He repeated almost the same thing he’d said earlier, “And my fiancée will have.....”

You hid a grin and ordered steak and chips, and Billy smiled “I’ll have the same,” at the waitress, before switching his gaze back to you a millisecond later. She looked at you, her mouth set in an irritated line and turned on her heel without another word. “And two beers, please,” you called after her. “Okay,” she said over her shoulder. You grinned over at your fiancé - your stomach leapt as you thought of him as that for the first time - “Y’know, if she worked for me, I’d fire her.” Billy nodded, smirking, “I know you would, angel. And not just ‘cause she’s got the hots for your fiancé.”

You swiped the menu at his his head, and he ducked out of the way with a joyous chuckle. You could tell that Billy was almost incandescent with happiness, and you felt glad that you’d made him really smile again.

While waiting on your food, you had a ‘brilliant’ idea. With Billy watching on with an amused smirk on his face, you took a photo of your ring and sent it to Karen.

About 10 seconds later, your phone rang and you answered it to a long loud shriek of “Ohmygod-Ohmygod-Ohmygod!” “Hi Karen,” you replied, holding the phone away from your ear and smiling at Billy.

She took a breath before saying, “So you did it! What happened to slowing down and waiting a little bit, then?!” You laughed, putting the phone on speaker, “I came round to Billy’s way of thinking.” You heard a chuckle from her, then Frank’s voice in the background, “Whass goin’ on?” Karen filled him in on the new development, he yelled something unintelligible and then suggested you all meet up for a celebratory drink. “Did you hear that?” asked Karen, “Wanna meet up for a drink?”

You looked over at Billy with a raised eyebrow, he nodded, so you said to Karen you’d meet the two of them at a bar halfway between the two neighbourhoods.

After consuming your late lunch faster than the speed of light, you and Billy headed out from the diner (you couldn’t resist giving the waitress the brightest smile as she frowned over at you while Billy paid) and walked to the bar to meet your two friends. Just as you approached it, a body slammed into you and two arms got you in a bear hug. Initially freezing in shock, you relaxed as you heard Karen squealing into your ear.

You managed to extricate yourself and as you did so, she grabbed your left hand, pulling it up to her face and squealing again, “Oh...! oh my god, it looks so good on you!” Grinning, you replied, “Why thank you,” as you made your way into the bar. Heading to an empty table, Frank went to the bar and ordered a bottle of champagne, returning to the table with it in an ice bucket. “Didn’t really see Frank as a champagne kinda guy,” you whispered to Karen. She and Billy grinned as Frank said. “I heard that!” and you looked at him apologetically, “C’mon, Frank, when was the last time you drank champagne?” He smiled, but a bit sadly, “At my wedding.”

Oh no, you thought, feeling instantly guilty. However Frank laughed now, “But if this isn’t a good time to take my second hit of champagne, I don’t know what is!” He glanced fondly over at Billy, who seemed to have a permanent smile on his face, then back at you, shaking his head and smiling, “You two.... I can’t keep up with you!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After several pleasant hours of drinking, chatting and laughing, you’d all eventually left the bar and gone your separate ways. Billy was now mildly tipsy, and insisted on walking down the street with both arms wrapped right around you. Which was fine until you met people coming in the other direction, meaning you had to dodge round them in an awkward dance, pulling Billy this way and that while he just clung onto you like an extra-large koala bear.

Back at his place, you were amused to see Billy’s eyes beginning to close drowsily, so despite all the filthy promises he’d been whispering into your ear the entire walk back, you two ended up just falling into bed and going to sleep.

You weren’t sure how many hours later, but you started to surface from your deep sleep as you suddenly became aware of hands on your breasts and something hard between your legs. Your eyes slowly opened to see Billy’s big dark eyes looking down into yours and then his hand found its way to your ring finger, bringing it to his lips and kissing it. Billy had somehow managed to part your legs and manoeuvre himself between them while you were sleeping on your side. Realising that Billy was already inside you and beginning to thrust, you whispered, “Billy, you cheeky big devil!!! I’m not awake yet,” but you only heard a low laugh from him as he carried on making love to you.

He was nuzzling into your neck, kissing and licking so you decided to take what was yours and grabbed two handfuls of his hair, pulling on it. He laughed out loud, “I guess you get to do that whenever you like now,” and thrust extra deep, making you gasp. “Definitely,” you managed to say as he rolled you over onto your back and pulled your knees up. His lips moved to your breasts, and your head went back onto the pillows as his tongue did its best work.

Suddenly he hit your sweet spot, and you hauled on his hair like you were trying to rein in a runaway horse, hearing an answering “Ow!” from him. You were just smirking to yourself when your climax hit you, and your mind went blank as you became completely immersed in it. Billy kept up his fast pace until you felt him shudder and release into you, his mouth biting down on your shoulder.

He moved onto his back, but somehow managing to stay inside you for the moment even as he softened. “Sweetheart.... you know I’m happy that you like my hair, but I truly don’t wanna be bald!” he laughed as he tried to get his breath back.

“I’ll buy you a wig!” you replied, “...sorry, Billy... not gonna stop pulling your hair, you know I’m not.”

Billy smiled lazily over at you, eyes staring into yours as he pulled slowly out of you, saying happily, “Yeah, angel, don’t worry... I know you’re not!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After breakfast, which involved a certain amount of kissing as well as the food items, you said to Billy that you needed to go shopping. You were just finishing a catch-up text with Jake, and noticed Billy reaching for his jacket. “No!” you blurted out, and he looked over at you in confusion and with a slightly hurt look on his face.

Billy seemed to need to be physically attached to you right now; he couldn’t stop stroking, touching, hugging, kissing you (with some licking thrown in there for good measure), so he looked really disappointed that you were insisting on going on your own. “I’ve just got a couple of extremely boring things to pick up, poppet and I don’t want to inflict that on you,” you soothed, going over to him for yet another long kiss.

“Okay, sweetheart,” he grumbled, “...how long you gonna be?” You stroked his face, “Not long, I promise.” A slightly happier look on his face, he sprawled out on the sofa and switched on the TV, so you sang out, “Bye!” and made your escape, a satisfied little smirk on your face.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Twenty minutes later, you were in Harry Winston’s Fifth Avenue store. The sales assistant was looking at you as if you’d been let out of a psychiatric unit for the day. You’d just handed her a ring made of out of a sliver of Post-It note, rolled up and sellotaped together. She took it from you, holding it between two fingers as if it might bite her.

You sighed, and decided to explain the situation to her as otherwise you didn’t think she’d take you seriously. “Look, my fiancé got me this ring....” extending your rock-laden finger towards her, “... but it was a complete surprise.” She now gave you a warm smile, recognising one of their very expensive engagement rings.

“And I want to get him a ring,” you carried on, “...and I want it to be a surprise for him too. Had to pretend I was just idly wrapping scrap paper round his fingers while I was watching something on Netflix.” It did look like something a kindergarten kid might’ve made, but you were quite proud of your improvised way of finding out Billy’s ring size.

Now she was really getting into it, leading you to a display case of big chunky men’s rings. “I’ve got something in mind, but I’m not sure you’ll have it in stock yet.” She gave you a quizzical look, and you described a ring you’d noticed recently in a fashion magazine; a fairly thin matt black titanium band, with two ultra-thin strips of platinum running round each edge. You knew that one of those chunky ones just wouldn’t look right at all on Billy’s long, slim finger.

She gave you a huge smile, “We’ve just launched some new collections, and that’s one of them! - our Midnight range. Please wait here, madam, and I’ll be right back.”

Soon you were on your way back uptown to Lenox Hill, and this time you were the one with a ring box hidden away out of sight.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

As you let yourself into the apartment and hung up your jacket by the door, you noticed that Billy had dozed off on the sofa. You loved watching Billy sleep, so perched on the edge next to him and stroked back a couple of strands of hair which had strayed onto his forehead.

He awoke at your touch, smiling sleepily up at you, “Angel, you’re back...”

You took hold of his left hand, and scrabbled around in your bag for the ring box. “Billy.... you remember you said you wanted something to show the world I belonged to you?” He gazed back at you warily, as if he thought you might’ve changed your mind while you were out. “Uh... yeah?”

“Well, snap!” you said, finally finding the box, opening it and then sliding the black band onto his ring finger.

Billy’s eyes widened, and mouth opened in surprise. “Wow!” he said, sitting up and looking at it closely, “I love it!” You breathed a sigh of relief: some guys didn’t even like wearing their wedding bands, never mind an engagement ring. “So you’ll wear it?” you asked. He nodded, “Uhuh, course I will, angel!”

He turned his hand this way and that, and you admired how good the slim band looked on his finger.

His dark eyes met yours, and he gave a low chuckle, “Ha, see...? Now you’ve got me on that leash, sweetheart!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

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