#its such an essential part of the experience

[celestialtarot11]

Moon in the 12h

Hey friends! Welcome back to another post focusing on the moon in the 12h! 🤍 just to spread some awareness on this placement. There’s a lot of great posts shedding light on this placement already ✉️ hoping to expand more on this post in the future in combination with esoteric astrology 👀 feel free to like comment & reblog! divider creds: @fairytopea

Natives with moon in the 12h often are left feeling excluded. Its not that they hate what is around them necessarily, but rather its what they wish they had that isn't in front of them. It often stems from family issues.

They want that safe happy family everyone else seems to have. Some natives may even look at other family through rosed colored glasses, projecting their fantasies, missing the idea that other families can struggle too.

But to 12h natives, its not just a fantasy. Its their inner child longing to be safe, to be held.

Moon in the 12h natives often grow up to understand what happens around them externally is essentially a product of their behavioral patterns.

Moon 12h aspects (square, opposition, conjunction)

Moon-saturn aspects often experience neglect, isolation during their hardest times by biological family and what they consider friends. The native clings to what sabotages them over and over, until they withdraw completely. Either that—or life has torn apart their relationships to show them they cant hold onto what is falling apart. It gives them no control to show them what they can control. And that is their ego, how they treat themselves. Their perspective, habits, etc.

Moon-pluto can result in the native feeling confused as to what their desires are. What their true nature is. They’re wrapped up in selling a persona someone else liked, in order to be validated. They get lost in fueling others so much they forget themselves. They can act as a, “pick me up,” easily. But when it comes to helping themselves the native may cope with unhealthy mechanisms. The native can experience views of self victimization, learned helplessness and obsessive tendencies towards others.

Moon-pluto aspects often experience turbulence regarding the mother. The mother could have been absent for some part of their life—or a female figure that was considered a guardian to the native, abandoned them. That female figure then became manipulative, trying to take advantage of the native’s emotions. This mother or guardian figure abandoned the native in times of need, and also forced the native to take responsibility that was never theirs to begin with.

Both saturn & pluto here force the native to grow up faster than necessary.

Regarding the father figure for moon-saturn aspects, or a male guardian to the native, the figure was cold. Demanding, harsh, and inflexible. The figure could have enforced strict rules to not allow the native to socialize—often pinning their fears onto the native. It’s very possible the father figure engaged in self sabotage in front of the native openly.

Moon-neptune aspects get consumed by energy completely. They become one with the energy in the room. Therefore if surrounded by toxicity, and negative energies the native can fall sick because of it (mentally, and physically speaking.)

These natives are the type to daydream about having the perfect family to feel safe in their heads. They block everything out that hurts them, and then eventually takes their feelings out on themselves. These natives possibly struggled with being seen as “less than,” in the family. Misogynistic parents or friends, parents or friends who belittle them, victimize themselves and yet expect the native to grow up—all whilst keeping the native “stuck” in a naive mindset.

Harsh expectations in their environment to be perfect all the time. Mental health? Basically does not exist in this environment. Same can be said for moon-saturn and pluto aspects.

Moon-mars aspect dealt with verbally aggressive environments, perhaps physical too. There is always someone trying to be “better,” than the native, or showcase their skills to seem higher than the native. Comparison, competition and jealousy often were in the household. Its very likely this came from a mother or female figure, and father figure/male figure as well.

The native dealt with roughhousing and learned to develop a sharp tongue to keep themselves safe. As a result they can be anxious, defensive as a way to protect their emotions. They’d rather keep their walls up as a defense than to let others in, because when the people closest to them saw them hurt, they were met with aggression.

Moon-mars native can have a hard time regulating their emotions, and have had the people around them be so focused on the “material realm,” like money, cars, etc, to the point of neglecting their emotional health.

When moon in 12h heals…

They learn to accept their emotions for what is. Are they actually being needy, clingy, “emotional,” or human? Slowly, they unravel the narratives that were forced onto them since a young age and discover their emotions aren’t the enemy.

It’s the harmful narratives and perspective around emotions that is the enemy.

Moon in the 12h can also begin to gain perspective as to why everyone is the way they are—generally, no human is completely sane. We are all traumatized in one way or another. But they know now this isn’t an excuse for mistreatment.

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[puuuders]

In Pursuit of Something Better ~ Part 6

Ghost fanfiction

Previous | Next

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Delta and Pebble complete chores together.

1.8k words

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During Secondo’s papacy, the ghouls were only let outside at certain times, much like dogs. Two, hour long intervals, once in the morning at 10 AM after breakfast, the second at 6 PM after dinner. More often than not, the ghouls would have to sacrifice this free time outdoors completing their chores, especially if these chores were in the garden, lake, or cemetery. This was another one of Secondo’s cruel entrapments: to refuse the ghouls to complete outdoor chores outside of outside time. And, of course, they would be punished for it if they failed to finish. Secondo’s favorite method of punishment was a spell titled Spiritus Privatio in the Grimoire, which essentially suffocated its victim to near death. Delta knew this all too well; being a water ghoul, it was especially torturous when he has had no prior experience of needing to hold his breath.

Delta was the one subjected to Secondo’s cruelty the most, having such a loose grip on his temper. He found himself collared in the basement multiple times a week, having lashed out at his Papa for one of his disgusting choices, or simply refusing to complete his duties as an act of rebellion. He was not necessarily in the wrong for his behavior, and Omega knew this, but the quintessence ghoul also knew that it was safer to stay silent. This moral disagreement between them sparked many fights, verbal and physical, tearing them apart from each other. The last time they embraced each other was the day Earth was banished. Earth and Delta were as thick as thieves, involved in each other’s lives almost to a fault.

One of the first things Terzo graciously granted the ghouls was two entire days off a week. Of course, they could not all have a day off at the same time apart from holidays that the ministry celebrated, which was also another gift from Terzo. He wanted to treat his ghouls and make them more comfortable, but work still needed to be done.

It was the second Wednesday of October, and a soft wind nipped at Delta’s cheeks. Wind bothered him more than his companion, Pebble, due to the fact that his skin was constantly producing a layer of water to keep it moist. Pebble was unaffected by pretty much any type of weather. Wednesdays were theirs and Alpha’s day of work, Alpha being assigned the task of washing dishes after mealtimes and Delta being assigned to clean the lake of any litter. Pebble had already finished his chores, which was tidying the many office and conference rooms of the ministry, so he tagged along with his friend.

“I shouldn’t have to do this in October,” Delta complained as they walked towards the lake, “it is too cold. I want to do the dishes.”

“If you told him that he might let you.” Pebble said. “I like the lake, I can do this by myself. Why don’t you-“

”I don’t want you to do it by yourself.”

”But you’re freezing.”

“I’m fine.”

The two made it to the dock, which Alpha had recently repaired a broken plank of. It was a completely different color than the rest of the muted brown wood, the new plank being almost merlot. Pebble immediately went for the trash can, tugging on the plastic bag. Delta picked up some litter further out on the dock, looking out at the gentle waves beneath the graying sky.

It was moments like these that made the water ghoul falter. He was suddenly thrusted back in time, sitting down at the edge of the dock some years ago, before Secondo. His head laid on the shoulder of Earth, tails intertwined from behind them, watching contently as the larger ghoul tossed dried corn out to the ducks that seemed to have indefinitely migrated recently.

”You can’t give ducks bread,” Earth would tell him every time they spent their time together like this, “it is bad for them.”

And Delta loved to hear it. He loved to hear Earth’s random tidbits of information, even when he had heard it plenty. Perhaps it was the way Earth would explain things to him without belittling and degrading him, making him feel intelligent for asking questions rather than stupid for not knowing the answers. Aero constantly made a show of how smart he was, only caring to speak to the other ghouls when it could prove his intellect. Alpha thought more with his emotions, something Delta could relate to, yet did not want to be part of. Omega was so judgemental, so paranoid about everything, it was impossible to have a conversation with him. Pebble was immature. Not stupid, but blissfully ignorant unless the truth was being dangled right in front of his nose. If Delta was being honest, he did not know what drew him to the ghoul so much. Perhaps it was nothing but the shared element between him and the one he lost.

He snapped out his thoughts as Pebble dragged the bag off of the dock. Delta sighed, looking down for a moment and then turning around to follow Pebble, picking up trash all around the lake. They made it halfway around, not finding much trash, before Pebble seemed to have read Delta's mind.

“Question.” Pebble spoke suddenly, startling Delta.

“Hm?” Delta didn't look at Pebble, continuing to watch his own feet step across the ground peppered with frost.

“What was Earth like?”

Delta's eyes widened beneath his mask, though he was not required to wear it in the ministry anymore. It was out of habit entirely, the shared quirk being the only thing he really had in common with the quintessence ghoul of the pack. His steps slowed in surprise, before returning to his previous pace, clasping his hands together behind his back.

“What do you wanna know that for?” He asked.

“You talk about him a lot,” Pebble said with a shrug of his shoulders, the trash bag thrown over his right one, “it's just weird not being the first earth ghoul when you guys are the first of your elements.”

Delta chuckled dryly, nodding. “Yeah. Earth was… Well I liked him a lot. ‘Til he did what he did, yeah. He was great. Don’t worry, you’re a good earth ghoul, if that’s why you’re thinking of that.”

“What happened?” Pebble tilted his head, looking up at Delta. Delta looked down at him, uncertainty in his eyes.

“What do you mean?” Delta asked. “You don’t know?”

Pebble shook his head. Delta hesitated before speaking, his breath a bit shaky.

“He uh… Did some pretty dumb things, I suppose.”

“Like?” Pebble pushed, lacking the emotional intelligence to understand Delta was uncomfortable. Delta wanted to tell him no, that he didn't want to talk about it. But it felt like the word ‘no’ vanished from his vocabulary when he spoke to Pebble.

“Apparently he made some kind of advancement on Secondo.” Delta sighed, hurt apparent in his now glistening eyes. “Secondo didn't like it. But… I don't understand.” Delta didn't realize he completely stopped walking, becoming enveloped in his thoughts and emotions. He began to raise his voice.

“He never rubbed me the wrong way like that. He was so clear about his relationship with me, at least with the other ghouls. I don't understand, why would he ever cheat on me with fucking Secondo? Someone I hate so much!”

Delta roared a pained growl, swinging his foot forward and kicking a nearby rock into the water in which he internally personified as his former partner. Pebble stood, frozen, watching Delta's meltdown. Delta dropped to crouch as the rock soared through the air, throwing his mask off and burying his face in his webbed hands as he began to sob. It was weeks worth of bottled emotion, Alpha constantly stuffing it in his mind that Earth was nothing to cry over, that Earth was disloyal, a liar, a hypocrite and a fake. Of course, Alpha said these things in a more gentle and empathetic tone, but the message was clear. Yet it did not make it any less confusing, he would never have any closure, any confirmed truth. Unless he went directly to Secondo, which he knew he would never. There would always be that weight in Delta's mind.

Pebble rubbed Delta's back in an attempt to comfort him, having dropped the trash bag and letting the contents spill onto the ground. His friend was more important than chores right now. Delta's skin greedily devoured each tear that streamed down his face, rehydrating his skin in a self sustaining cycle. It was fascinating for Pebble to watch.

“That is just how some people turn out to be,” Pebble offered, though he was not the most empathetic ghoul, “people lie.”

“It is so hard,” Delta choked out, “I don't understand, why would he lie? For Secondo? He was too smart for that!”

“You said Earth tried to sleep with Secondo?”

Delta nodded, clutching at his eternally wet gray hair. Pebble narrowed his eyes in thought.

“Secondo was probably lying then I bet.”

Delta sniffed, wiping his eyes, but his emotion was still very much present in his voice and expression.

“It wasn’t even Secondo who told me! Alpha did!” He gasped, his voice hoarse.

“How did Alpha know?”

“He was on laundry duty and said he walked in on Earth on his fucking knees in front of Secondo.”

“Damn.” Pebble murmured under his breath. He continued to rub Delta's back, his fingers climbing up to caress his damp hair.

“I can imagine how frustrating it is. But I think it’s better not knowing, yeah? At least I’d rather not know than see that.”

Delta nodded under Pebble’s gentle touch, the light scratching of his claws soothing him. His mind was still racing, and he did not necessarily agree with Pebble. Part of him didn't want to know, but the other wanted closure. If only he were a quintessence ghoul, so he could see Alpha’s memories for himself. But he was not. He was a measly water ghoul, face dripping onto the dying grass below him as his own tears overhydrated him.

“Omega-“ Delta choked, pushing himself up and clearing his throat as he pulled himself towards the trash on the ground, “where is Omega? Today, today… Today is Tuesday- no no, Wednesday. Megs is off!”

Delta began scooping the fallen trash into the white plastic bag, the webs between his fingers siding him in the process. Pebble helped, though he continued looking at Delta.

“Huh?”

“I’ll ask Omega to do it,” Delta smiled for once. “And it’s so easy to tell if Megs is lying.”

“You think he will?” Pebble smiled back. Delta shrugged dismissively, picked up the bag, almost dragging Pebble with it as he slung it over his shoulder and began walking urgently back to the building.

[the-tubort]

Top 5 toku intros

5. Gotchard

4. Ex-Aid

3. OOO

2. Den-O

1. Ryuki

[mariocki]

Honor Blackman guest stars as art expert Syd Lewis in Saber of London: Deep in the Heart of Chelsea (1.3, NBC, 1957)

[voiider]

i just need Damian sitting on a couch and shoving his cold clammy feet with his nasty-ass toenails under his brother's bare legs. And Tim refusing to share a bed with Damian because he "rapid kicks" in the middle of the night. him shoving his frozen hands up Dick's shirt. just younger sibling things

[calpalsworld]

had a moment where i thought i was redesigning treetop and windows but then i realized no the fuck i am not. my friends talked me out of it they said they "miss treetop" when i tried to change how he looks. and it was really hard for me to draw windows different from how she is. but here you go you get to see my thoughts anyway. ok now my friends are talking me into making treetop closeted transfem but idk we will see what happens the growth is attacking the city as we speak

[skunkes]

talon's been such a fun oc so far because he's essentially written himself.... thats probably Not Super Great in terms of originality but whatever no idea is original and its been fun to easily piece everything together while getting to know him better ^_^

[gurorori]

speaking of not having a room in my life ever... don't think it's ever talked abt how much of a deeply traumatic n dehumanising experience that is & i mean that wholeheartedly

everyone our age i know to this day who we grew up with has one, grown up with one since early childhood, had choice in what to surround themselves with in their own space and could have privacy when needed

i sleep in a single bed in a corner, that's all i have. we've always shared a room with 1-3 ppl and it was never a bearable experience growing up, but once you reach your early teens i feel like it just starts being traumatising regardless of environment. i know most of the time it's not anyone's intent to deprive children of personal space, it is most often the result of poverty & inability to give them that but i'm fully convinced you should not be having a child if you can't give them that

maybe my own experience is saturated by other household trauma that this lack of personal space opened us up to but as a whole, i think it's abuse to deny a growing human being their fully own space, as small as it could possibly be, any space at all ... i can't really explain why it's such an important part of growing up but not only do i still feel alienated based on that alone, i also don't feel like i have any right to privacy at all, no place i can just be and do what i want without being watched, judged, commented on or demanded a change (i can't turn the light on/off or close/open the door or windows without input! i can't keep the door closed at all actually bc she will come and open it and ask why i need it closed!)

anyway i just feel like it contributed to our trauma insurmountably and affected our mental health to this day. it feels like yet another puzzle piece in 'normal human development' missing that i will never be able to fill in?

i wonder if there r any studies done on this or any professional opinion on depriving children of personal space & privacy. reading other people's experiences online unanimously seems to imply it immensely fucked up our senses of self n complicated being in touch with our needs

so conclusion i guess. if ya plan on ever having N amount of children PLEASE think realistically if yr able 2 provide em an environment that allows em 2 have all of their needs fulfilled... n that absolutely includes the right to privacy

[uwanosorade]

It's so weird being old enough to see Code Geass enter the Nostalgia Zone

[featherymainffins]

I think it's a hatecrime against me that there aren't any slugs as big as the giant African snail. Why do the snails get to have all the fun I just want a giant slime noodle.

[mythicalcoolkid]

You don't want to be more ill or more visibly ill. You want it to be easier

[nonuggetshere]

So they didn't become void, they were "born" that way

In FaaF there are different species and kinds of higher beings (still a MASSIVE work in progress tbh, trying to figure out how these cunts work, but for now I'm thinking they're extremely rare species with far greater abilities and lifespans than a normal bug's that have a chance to ascend to true godhood (but even if they don't ascend that doesn't stop mortals from worshipping them as they're already very god-like from a normal bug's perspective)), "pale beings" being one of these kinds/mutations.

Well, there was also a different kind once, "void beings", but they all went extinct a very long time ago by the beginning of the story. Shade Lord was one, and last, of them and it lost its life in a fight with Radiance - the same fight that drove her to make her permanent residence in the dream realm out of her new-found fear of death (which backfired spectacularly ngl). Its body was buried in the Abyss, where it broke apart and decayed, or decayed as much as a non-living thing can, before it was unearthed many ages later by the pale wyrm.

Not much is known about them since they've been gone for so long, and the vessels are the only void beings remaining, but since they're not "pure" void beings it'd be foolish of anyone to assume that the ancient extinct species behaved the same way as these ones do. But they were generally greatly feared thanks to the void's freaky, dangerous properties, which partly lead to their extinction as some of the other higher beings purposefully attacked and killed them whenever they stumbled across one out of fear. Now the only thing remaining of them are the rare void sources, where their former bodies still refuse to fully die.

Shade Lord does get accidentally resurrected in the story bc of all the tomfoolery happening with its body before almost immediately getting killed again by Ghost who inherits its title and reign. Don't ask me how that works, haven't figured that out yet. Magic god shit or something idk LMAO

[mariemariemaria]

the people who think that christianity is the worst most problematic religion ever and the people who think that islam is the worst most problematic religion ever are two sides of the same coin to me

[weaverofink]

i can’t believe THIS is the guy giving me gender envy

[davidtennantpussytulpa]

when you literally live in a world that wasnt made for you 😆🔫

[slutdge]

how am i supposed to romaticize my life when theres 2 feet of snow on the ground 😭