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ithinkabouthowtothink · 3 years

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Old Times - Part III

Rafe x Reader go on their first date. But something, more like someone, from Reader’s recent past shows up causing Rafe to come undone.

Warnings: argument, pure smut, fingering, unprotected sex

Part II Part IV

The clacking of your heels on the white tile echo around you as you walk into your living room. A full length mirror leans against the wall. You take in your appearance making any last minute changes due to your anxious mind. But you don’t need to. Red fabric clinging against your body as you turn to check the back of the dress and it accents all the right places. Rafe won’t be able to keep his hands off you.

Your chest heavy as you think about the way he will look at you. Wide hungry eyes and busy hands. You hope you’re up all night with him. It’s been two and a half weeks since you had Rafe all to yourself and one less day since you made plans to see each other. But as life usually happens as you make plans Rafe had construction jobs get pushed longer and couldn’t get away. Thank God for FaceTime. You speak every day and it’s nice to have him back in your life. Rafe has told you so many new things he has picked up in his life. He enjoys cooking even though he gets to cook for one he still loves it, he says he’s pretty good at it too. He works out more than before since quitting his drug addiction. At first when he mentioned the substance abuse you would tense up and immediately wanted to change the conversation. Soon you came to realize the importance of being there for Rafe. If he is able to forgive himself and be strong enough to overcome all of that then you can easily listen to him. The changes he has made are adamant and you’re proud to know him now.

Rafe offered to pick you up from your apartment but you decline wanting to meet him at the restaurant. In your mind it made things more exciting somehow.

You grab your keys and lock up your apartment before heading down to the car park. The drive to Beck’s feels so long even though it’s only 10 miles from your place. As you pull up to the restaurant valet is waiting five cars deep. You sigh seeing young men around the age of 16 running around in bright white shirts on the dark night. One runs over to you after what feels like forever with a sweaty forehead. He places a hand on top of your car and leans forward into the passenger side.

“Hi ma’am sorry about the wait. Friday nights are always busy.” The young man excuses through heavy breathing.

“No worries.” You smile as you get out of your side holding it open for the guy to get in. He runs over to your side and hands you a white ticket.

You stride over to the black canopy shading over the entrance. You can hear the smooth strum of jazz music as another young man opens the door for you with a nod as you walk through. Your eyes look over to the clock hanging on the wall in the waiting area and you notice you’re 15 minutes early. The table probably isn’t ready yet. Rafe probably isn’t here yet.

“Good evening. Name?” A woman with kind eyes asks from a wooden podium as the light from an iPad glows in the dark room. Low lights everywhere to set the mood before you’re even sat.

“Hello, name should be under Cameron, Rafe. I’m a little early.” You nervously laugh at your eagerness.

The women smiles politely then takes her attention to the iPad as she taps and swipes across the device.

“Oh, yes. He paid extra to get a table before his time because he arrived early. He seems very nervous too.” She leaned closer to fill you in.

“And he looks quite nice. A few ladies did a double take when he walked in.” She continued as she raised an eyebrow. She’s much older then your parents so you take all of this with heart as she gushes.

“I’ll make sure to keep my eye out.” You wink as you tuck your hair behind your ear. She laughs at your wit and steps out from behind the stand.

“I’ll walk you over, Dear.” She smiles and puts her hands together as she walks you past the busy tables of couples. You see Rafe before he spots you. He’s sitting facing you with a glass of water almost empty in front of him. He’s looking down at his suit jacket and opens it to straighten his black tie. He looks up and eyes the room then a wide tooth smile spreads across his face as his blue eyes meet yours. He stands up quick almost knocking his chair over. He catches it last minute and you giggle at his actions.

“You two have a lovely night.” The hostess smiles genuinely as Rafe walks over to your chair. She leaves you two to your date and your chest becomes heavy instantly.

“Hi.” You smile as Rafe’s tall figure towers over you. Matching black jacket and slacks cover him. You didn’t think he could look any better than he normally does but you eat your words as he stands above you looking beautiful in his suit. He brings a hand up to your neck and lightly pecks your cheek. You know he wants to do much more but he can’t and you want to scold yourself for being in public.

“Hi.” Rafe whispers against your cheek. His thumb lightly moving back and forth as you lean into his hand before he pulls away. He walks to your chair and pulls it open for you. You smile wider at him as you take your long awaited seat and he pushes your chair in for you. A proper date. Off to a good start.

“You look beautiful.” He gushes once he is sat across from you. You catch his eyes move to your exposed cleavage and you smirk at him. He is so easy.

“I would believe you if I didn’t just catch that.” You scold him with a grin. You both begin to laugh at how serious this date is. You feel so out of place.

“You do look beautiful. Red is your color, baby.” Rafe compliments. Hearing him mutter that nickname he used to use makes your heart flutter. Suddenly you feel 19 again.

“Seeing you in a suit is doing things to me Mr. Cameron.” You flirt back knowing he loves when you call him that. He raises an eyebrow and shifts in his seat.

“Be careful, Y/N. We’ll have to skip straight to dessert if you can’t control that mouth.” He fires back. He licks the corner of his mouth and you swallow hard wanting so bad to test his words. Starting over is going to be tough tonight.

Luckily the waiter comes to take your drink orders. Rafe insists no wine for him just more water but you ask for a glass of Cabernet. Your drinks come quick and he allows time for you to overlook the menu.

“So tell me how your family is. How’s Sarah and Wheezie?” You were never close with Sarah due to the age gap maybe or the fact that you were too busy being consumed with Rafe. Wheezie on the other hand was always sweet and innocent.

Rafe takes a sip of water and slides a hand over his suit jacket. His gold ring reflecting in the low yellow light.

“Well, Wheezie is dating now. Can you believe that? Little Wheeze running around with guys, she’s 18 now so I guess that’s normal.” He shakes his head. Unbelievable that his littlest sister grew up so fast.

“Wow, 18? And boys? I figured she’d be into studies and looking at colleges.” You question as you take a drink of your wine.

“I know, I know. I did too. And Sarah is still kicking things with John B. I’m glad she’s happy. They have a place on The Cut and she really seems to enjoy it out there. I can’t judge though since I’m still at home with Ole Dad.” Rafe fills you in and clicks his tongue at his last sentence. You knew Sarah and Ward hit a bump once she began dating John B. But you are surprised to hear she’s out on the other side of the island. I guess the whole Kooks and Pogues bit is real for a lot of people.

“No, you shouldn’t feel bad for still being home. Do you feel like you should leave?” You question him really wanting to know. He sounds sad when he says it.

The waiter politely interrupts again to get your food orders. He takes the menus and nods once you say what you’d like. Your food comes quickly as you catch up.

“Rafe, have you looked at other places?” You pry again. He scratches the side of his neck and rubs the back of his head. You remember when felt like a burden still being at home. You didn’t leave until you were 20 so you can only imagine how Rafe feels.

“Uhm yeah kinda. I like still being home but there’s not as much privacy as I thought. You know with Rose coming and going.” Rafe let’s out a small laugh as he gestures to you referencing to that night.

“Yeah.” You clench your teeth and join his laugh. The two of you used to have sex wherever you could without getting caught when you were younger but now is when you do. Life is funny that way.

“How about your parents?” He asks but he knows how they are. You watch him stick his fork into his steak and slice down to cut himself a piece. It happens in slow motion as you watch him turn the fork up and into his mouth. His cheeks puff out as he chews the piece of meat. He does everything well.

“Nothing new I guess. Well, I think my mom may hate me since we’re dating again but I won’t hold my breath.” You laugh out as you twirl your fork into your pasta.

“Dating, yeah?” Rafe raises an eyebrow in between chews.

You pinch your thigh as you realize what you just said. You two hadn’t even mentioned what this is yet. Why would you think you’re dating?

“I didn’t mean t-. We don’t have to talk about it. I’m sorry.” You weakly smile and your face heats up immediately. You grab your glass and down the rest of your alcohol to give you courage to get through this moment.

“No, no I like that you said that. But things are moving pretty fast for a first date.” Rafe smirks as he takes a drink from his water. He always knows how to make you squirm. You roll your eyes at him and sit back in your seat.

“This is nice, Rafe. Thank you for taking the time to come all the way out here to see me.” You reach across the white table cloth for his hand. He cups your hand into his swallowing it up. You lean your head into your shoulder and just admire him before you. Now it feels like five years was worth it. For you to find yourself, for Rafe to trust himself. Right person, wrong time means so much to you now because it’s true.

“Thank you for giving me another chance Y/N.” He gives your hand a sincere squeeze. Now would be a great time to reach over and kiss him. After being away from each other for two weeks you really need him.

“Rafe, want to get outta here?” You practically beg him. He nods halfway through your question and you smile with relief.

“If you want to get your car I will handle the check.” He offers knowing its a busy night so valet could possibly take longer than expected.

“Meet you outside.” You stand up and kiss his cheek while you squeeze his shoulder. You know he watches you walk away so you add a little more sway into your steps. You turn to look over your shoulder. There he is sliding a hand over his open mouth and you hope he’s drooling.

As you reach the door to outside you rummage through your purse for the white ticket. The same young man in the stark white shirt smiles and mumbles something to you as he takes your ticket and disappears around the corner. You stand near the valet stand as you wait for him to pull your car around. A few minutes go by and still nothing.

“Y/n?” You hear someone say as a hand grabs onto your shoulder. You turn your head around unsure who it is by the voice.

Then you notice him right away. His dirty blonde hair and light green eyes smile back at you. The man stands close enough for you to notice the new stubble on his chin.

“Dylan, how are you?” You are surprised to see him here. You met Dylan when he came in as a partner with one of your clients last year. A couple hook ups and an awkward morning later you came to the conclusion you did not want to see him romantically anymore. He is a nice guy, he just isn’t Rafe.

“I’m fine. It’s great to see you, you look amazing as always.” He eyes your body dramatically. You’ve always kept up with your figure but being on the go with work and living off a cycle of coffee and red wine helped balance off weight.

“Thank you.” You weakly smile as he looks back at the restaurant door.

“Who are you here with?” You notice he’s waiting for a car and this isn’t the kind of place you visit alone.

“Yes, my um date is inside.” He says through closed teeth as he points a thumb over his shoulder to Beck’s.

“That’s good. Glad you’re having a nice night.” You try to cut the conversation as you stretch your neck to see if your car is almost here. What is taking them so long?

“Hey baby.” You hear Rafe as he walks up to you. You’re thankful we makes it out when he does because Dylan is starting to stare more then you welcome. Rafe places a hand on your lower back as you lean into his side perfectly fitting as you always should.

“Rafe, this is Dylan. He’s a client.” You curtly introduce the two men standing in silence.

“Nice to meet you.” Rafe firmly holds a hand out to Dylan. Dylan’s hesitation to shake your boyfriend’s hand does not go unnoticed by Rafe.

“Yeah, pleasure man.” Dylan puffs his chest out as he shakes Rafe’s hand.

Luckily your car comes quick to save the awkward moment between the three of you. The valet parks your car in front of you and runs over to hand you the keys. Rafe hands the man a tip and nods in a thank you, his hand never leaving its place on your back. A small blonde woman walks over to Dylan as you begin turning to Rafe to ask him if he is going to follow you back to your apartment in his car. You notice Dylan paying little attention to who you assume is his girlfriend.

“Good to see you Y/N, take care.” Dylan walks over to you and kisses your cheek. You freeze as you are taken aback by his actions. You did not expect him to touch you let alone be so advanced in his confidence with you. Last time you saw him was so long ago. You barley had any feelings towards him. Guilt begins to run down your spine as he pulls away.

You nod quickly as you turn back to your car.

“Will you follow me in your car back to my place?” You plead Rafe. He doesn’t look you in the eye as he opens your driver door for you. He nods lightly and you sigh knowing what he’s thinking. You are aware Rafe has your address so you get in your car as he strides to the parking garage across the street without a word.

The drive home gives you little time to settle your nerves. To Rafe, the way Dylan looked at you must seem like unresolved issues. You two never dated. How do you make Rafe understand your heart has always been with him?

You are walking through the lobby of your apartment building as too many scenarios of how the rest of your night will go play out in your head. Rafe probably won’t come over now. Your night is ruined and you haven’t even begun to talk with him.

You set your purse on the white granite of your kitchen island. You light a few candles to set the mood in hoping Rafe doesn’t bring an argument with him. Running into your room you remove your red dress and heels as you put on your floral lace lingerie. You had hoped Rafe would be the one removing your dress but this lingerie might encourage him more now that things are messy. The night is still going to go as you planned you tell yourself. Nice night with wine and wrinkled sheets, hopefully sore legs too.

You hear a knock at your door as you fix your breasts inside your bra. You grab your silk robe to leave little imagination to what is underneath. Releasing a loud sigh you walk over to unlock your front door as you tighten the the robe shut.

“Hi.” You neutrally greet Rafe as you open the door. He looks at you with wide eyes noticing your outfit change. You take a step back welcoming him inside. He walks passed you without a word.

“Rafe, can we please talk?” You plead as you shut and lock the front door. You feel him walk through the living room and to the balcony. He’s more upset than you thought. You follow close behind and he lights a cigarette before you step onto the concrete outside. He takes a long drag and leans onto the railing.

“I know I shouldn’t be mad Y/N. It was all a mystery to me if you have been with someone else. I was fine not knowing. But seeing you two interact like that made my stomach flip. I had to physically stop myself from wanting to wring his neck.” He laughs repulsively as he shakes his head at the thought of your body wrapped around Dylan’s. He brings the cigarette between his lips again not looking at you. His lips hold the cigarette in his mouth as he loosens the black tie from his neck needing more air. He brings the tie over his head and sets it on the wicker chair behind him. You take a step next to him and place your hand over his in an attempt for him to respond to you.

“Rafe, please. It was nothing. I don’t know why he would kiss my cheek. We never had anything serious.” You try to make him understand. A light breeze blows against your face and the cool air makes you realize how much you are sweating. The last thing you want to do is talk about a meaningless, not someone you want to remember, hook up.

“That doesn’t make me feel any better.” His voice stern as he looks at you to the side without turning to face you.

“Oh, You never had anyone after me? We were kids then, Rafe. Why is everything made into a big deal with you?” You raise your voice at him. He has no right to treat you like you did something wrong.

“Yeah, alright. This is what you wanna do?” He rhetorically asks. He drops his cigarette to his feet and steps on it putting it out. Long arms widened out at his side and he throws his head back in a laugh.

“There was a lot going on after you left. I tried to forget you Y/N. I did what I had to do too, but no one is you.” Rafe runs both palms through his hair as you watch him freak out. The night turned upside down so quick.

“I really don’t want to do this.” You put your head in your palms and try to hold back tears realizing your night is ruined.

Rafe walks over to you and grasps onto your wrists pulling your hands away from your face. Tears stream down your face and you keep your eye level on the iron railing. Rafe tilts your head up with two fingers meeting your eyes in a hopeful attempt to read your face.

“No one is you. It didn’t matter what I tried to do either. I just didn’t like the way he was looking at you.” His eyes frantically searching yours as he brushes a tear from your cheek. You close your eyes as his soft lips meet your face and slowly peck down your neck. With one of his rough hands stabilizing below your ear you tilt into his kiss. You flutter your eyes open and pull him in by his jacket.

“I hate that he’s touched you.” His words mumbled against your skin as you feel him pull the tie on your robe. One hand grabbing your waist as he walks you backwards. Cold concrete meets your back and his lips become aggressive against your skin. Rafe detaches himself from you and opens the silk exposing your body. Breathe heavy in your chest rising up and down wanting to know what he’s thinking. He leaves no imagination as he wets his lips with his tongue eyeing every inch of you in the thin lace material.

“Rafe I wan-.” Your attempt to converse is thrown to the side as Rafe wraps one hand tightly under your thigh bringing it to his hip. You wrap your arms around his neck as he pulls your other leg around his waist. You can feel how hard he is against your center. He presses himself against you wanting you to know how you make him feel.

“These are my lips.” Rafe says as he forgivingly kisses your parted lips. A low moan comes from you as repeats his earlier actions trailing his plump lips down your neck.

“Mine to touch.” He whispers his possessions as he palms your bra applying slight pressure over your nipple with his thumb.

“No ones but mine.” He shifts his jaw as he looks down at your heavy chest and looks to you through furrowed brows. You nod your head at him and he curls his lips into a sultry smile. As you stabilize yourself against the wall and hold yourself up with legs still attached around Rafe he removes his hand from your breast and positions it by your head on the wall. He forms two fingers to the fabric of your underwear gliding down the band near the top of your leg. He slowly slides the the fabric tightly met on your lower lips to the side. One finger swirls lightly on your clit as you arch your back in pleasure.

“Yeah?” Rafe watches you come undone at his slick movements rubbing your wet core. You continue nodding your head encouraging him but you can’t keep your eyes open no matter how much you love watching his fingers fuck you. His motions quicken as the coldness of his ring finds itself between your lips. He slides two fingers down then inside you. Pumping slowly and the quiet pace drives you insane.

“Rafe, I need you to go faster.” You demand through breaths. He ignores your request continuing his work on your lower half. You open your eyelids watching him drunk in love as his eyes watch your mouth part.

“I want you to tell me who makes you feel this way. No one else can make you wet like I do.” Rafe is right. His lips meet yours again and you’re hungry for a taste. His whole body stills including his fingers detaching from your sweet spot. Pedals of sweat are on his forehead as he grips your hips with each hand. A tight hold on your body as he waits for his answer.

You let out a light laugh watching his expression stiffen before you.

“You. No one else makes me feel this way.” You give in knowing you want him just as badly. Rafe’s kisses begin again but in more need.

His lips part allowing your tongue to slip in aggressive against his. He pulls your legs from his waist and gently brings your feet back to the concrete. Rafe’s long fingers wrap inside the elastic waistband on your lingerie pulling it from you and down each leg. You step out of them quickly and he kisses your clit sweetly on his way back up to you. He stands above you wetting his lips again. He shuts his eyes and your hands hurry with his belt. He helps you lower his zipper to expose him. You reach for his member removing his length from his now tight pants. Wrapping one hand around him you begin pumping him quickly as he pushes you back to your place on the wall. You lift your knee up to his hip but he’s still too tall to gain access comfortably inside you. You whimper at your attempt to match your bodies but you need his help again. Rafe let’s out a low laugh at your need for him. He knows he isn’t the only one who craves the need for the other.

As your bodies repeat the same position, only this time with less fabric between you, sloppy kisses are rushed against wet lips as fingers are entangled in a mess of brown hair. You continue your hand on his length and press the tip to your wet center. Rafe let’s out a loud moan at the sensation you know feels just as sweet to him. A hiss falls from his parted lips as his chest rises and falls. He brings his eyes to your naked hips and watches as he pushes himself into you slowly. His eyes drunkenly find yours and he pulls halfway out slamming inside you without breaking eye contact.

“Rafe.” You moan out his name as you feel his hips push you into the hard wall behind you. You fumble to remove his jacket in need to have his body closer. Rafe helps you push his suit off hearing the clothing hit the floor next to your underwear.

Rafe quickens his pace inside you as your fingers undo the clear buttons from their slot on his white shirt. You must be taking too long for his liking as he brings his hands to either side of the clothing and rips forcing the buttons to pop off. You let out a hot breath at finally being able to touch his bare chest. You tighten your legs around his hips as you feel his hands move to your bare ass. He stays inside you as he walks your conjoined bodies back inside your living room and through the single hallway to your bedroom.

Pushing the door open with his shoe he easily stalks over to your bed releasing you onto the mattress. He positions your body on the edge of the bed spreading your knees wider so he can watch himself glide in and out of you. His pace continues steady and you forget all about his jealous argument. You also forgot about his great stamina. You were so aroused to be with him last time you didn’t care to keep things slow.

You arch your back and feel his thumb circle on your clit. The bedroom fills with sounds of mixed pants and rough breaths as the pleasure overwhelms your entangled bodies. Rafe moves his hands to your hips and fucks you harder than he ever has. The pounding of him inside you makes your walls tighten.

“I love you.” Rafe breaths out not stopping his heavy hips.

Your legs begin to shake at the intense pace he’s going. He doesn’t plan on stopping until he’s done.

“I’m so close.” You warn the man before you.

“Yeah, me too.” He pants as his thrusts turn sloppy. His sweat covered face turns up and he pushes into you two hard times as he feels you tighten around him as you reach your orgasm. His climax pools inside you as he watches you come undone. His movements steady as he moves his palms from your knees and leans over you on the bed kissing your tender lips.

“God Rafe. I don’t know what that was but it was great.” You praise your boyfriend knowing he loves being appreciated.

Rafe pulls out of you and cups his hand over the top of his length as he cums more. He smiles as you watch him. His tan pecs move up and down as he catches his breath from his workout. Rafe disappears into your bathroom and you hear the water come on. He comes back moments later and he’s fully naked now. Rafe pushes the silk robe from your shoulders then helps you up from the mattress and finds the hook on your bra. He removes it with ease and guides you to the steam filled bathroom.

The hot water feels great against your chest and Rafe hugs you from behind massaging your breasts as he kisses your neck. You remove your body wash from the porcelain shelf of the bath and push on the cap.

“Let me.” Rafe mumbles in your ear as he takes the bottle from your hand. You watch as he squirts the pink liquid into his large palm. His hands lather against your tired skin and down between your legs. He’s gentle as he cleans you knowing he was rough with you minutes ago.

Once the shower is finished you both tuck yourself under the covers of your duvet. You settle into the curve of his bare body and lean the back of your head into his chest. You exchange small laughs as he runs fingertips along your side causing a tickle to spark over your skin.

“Goodnight baby.” Rafe kisses against your shoulder holding you tighter than before. With closed eyes you smile at him knowing he means it.

“I love you.” You remark. Rafe rests his cheek on the top of your head as your legs are intertwined under the blanket. Rafe’s chest falls into a steady pattern of breathing giving away that he’s asleep. You close your eyes knowing you’re right where you are meant to be.

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beigehearts · 3 years

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BRO IVE BEEN WAITING FOR A POLY ASK: AND A YANDERE ONE??? THIS IS A GOLD MINE Thank you so much butterscotch princess😭

CW: mental/physical abuse, kidnap, fighting

Of course you love the both of them, if not you wouldn't be here. Or at least you did love them. They were a couple and you weren't particularly interested in being a home wrecker. Yet, you can't hide anything from these two, they're definitely not stupid. To be honest things were becoming stale for Hisoka, and that's when they invited you into their relationship. Everything seemed so perfect at first, two men that you loved dearly who provided a balanced life. You could go to Hisoka for something exciting and new, but sit down with Illumi and relax. The three of you made a power throuple. But if it seems like it is too good to be true, it is. It really was too good.

It had been a few months into the relationship when there were red flags. Illumi and Hisoka never fought for each other, they never had to. You made sure they had their own time with each other. It was when it came to you that there was a problem. Constant arguing and fights over who gets to spend time with you and enjoy your company. Your idea of all of you hanging out was shut down, they each wanted their alone time with you. It went on like this for a few months. Until one day, it all stopped.

Suddenly it seemed as if your boyfriends had never fought in the first place. They never argued over spending time with you, they just knew when they could be with you one on one. At first you thought it was great. You were worried about their relationship for one another, and if it would last much longer like this. They must have talked about it civilly, otherwise it couldn't be so easy for them.

All of the red flags had been lowered and it was back to the honeymoon phase. The three of you got to cuddle at night while you could still have coffee with just one of them in the morning, or they could together. Honestly you weren't so sure about a polyamorous relationship in the beginning, but now you wouldn't change it for the world. Well, at that time you wouldn't have.

Suddenly the atmosphere changed, and you did not see it coming. Whenever you planned to go out, Hisoka and Illumi seemed to be on the same page about you not leaving. ----

"Hey, I'm gonna go hang out with some friends, I'll see you guys later!" You called out as you tied your shoes.

Illumi began taking off your coat and now you were very confused. "You shouldn't go out." He stated.

Hisoka chimed in from the kitchen while he made coffee, "It's going to rain, we don't want you to get caught in a storm."

"I'll just bring an umbrella, and anyway, Daisy will just drive me home." You responded.

Illumi shook his head and hung up your coat, "The news said it would be really bad today."

Hisoka added, "You guys may not even be able to drive in that kind of rain."

---- Everytime it went like this, there was always an excuse. It even got so bad that you were fired from your job. You spend every day at home now. Any time you even mention leaving anymore now, it isn't just excuses. "You won't be able to protect yourself." "Fine, if you get hurt it's your fault." "You can't apply to another job, you really think you can get another one after being fired?" Always something, and it's really starting to get to you. Soon enough it only escalated at it had been. You got dressed to leave and ignored their excuses, opening the door and stepping out. That's when it happened, that's when everything really changed. As you went to shut the door behind yourself, it slammed shut. It slammed shut right on your fingers.

Illumi came out and carried you back inside while you gasped and cradled your hand to your chest. "This is what happens when you don't listen to us. You'll get hurt." That's when you realized how bad things really had gotten. You were pretty sure that three of your fingers were broken, but Illumi wrapped them up with a splint and called it a day.

You just can't do this anymore. If they aren't going to let you leave, then you're going to have to sneak out. Or devise a plan. Of course Hisoka went through your messages, but that would be perfect for your plan. You managed to create a text chain with your 'sick older sister'. She asked that you come to see her ASAP because she is not doing well. This is something that they would allow you to do since it would be a one time thing.

As you laced your shoes and shrugged on a jacket, Hisoka and Illumi watched. Hisoka's hand was wrapped around Illumi's waist, and you could see his anxious grip on him.

"Okay, I'll be back at 4 pm." You had learned to lie through your teeth like a pro.

Hisoka forced a smile and nodded, "Illumi will be there to pick you up."

You give the both of them a quick kiss on the cheek and trot out of the door while waving. "See you soon!"

The sound of the door clicking closed behind you was the sound of jail break. You couldn't help it... You skipped down the hallway while giggling, until your skip turned into a run. And when you turned around? No one was there.

----

Killua and Gon were a god send. They accepted you as a person and your friendship became unbreakable. Each day when you woke up, you were excited to face the day. Most of your free time is spent with these two goof balls. If not with them, you're working.

They swung by your workplace when your shift ended so you guys could hangout. While these two are younger than you, they're very mature. Sometimes. And all of their friends are your friends, Kurapika and Leorio who are closer to your age. You would hang out with them too if it weren't for the fact they were always out of town for work.

The three of you make your way to the convenience store. Killua had been begging for the past two days that you guys go get Choco Robots.

Gon checks his phone and announces, "Kurapika and Leorio will be back tomorrow! Leorio said they got a hotel room for the night and would be back to travelling by tomorrow."

You and Killua know that means they're sharing a bed, but Gon is oblivious. And it's really not important for Gon to know at the moment.

Killua throws his arms in the air and yawns, "You always get off work so late. Why can't you work any earlier?"

"Tell that to my manager, she's the one in control of that." You retort.

An idea pops into Gon's head and you can tell because his eyes light up. "Instead of going all the way home, you should sleep over with us tonight! Alluka would love to see you again!"

"You know that her place is closer to us right now than ours, right?" Killua asks.

Gon's eyebrows furrow and he puts a finger to his lip, "Oh yeah..."

The convenience store's doors slide open and make a quiet 'ding' sound. Killua makes a bee line for the Choco Robots and begins putting the whole stock into a basket. You and Gon look at the drinks section and he settles on some strawberry lemonade. Besides the sleeping cashier, you three are the only ones perusing through the gas station sized mart.

Gon is pointing out the condoms and asking what they are when the soft 'ding' of the door sounds out. Killua is blushing and telling him to put the box back while you hold back laughter.

"Gon! Stop it! Just- just put them back!" He stutters out. They may have seemed mature for their age at first, but moments like this make you question it.

You feel a hot breath on the back of your neck and the voice to follow shakes you to your core.

"So this is where you've been hiding."

You whip around and push Hisoka away from you, it doesn't do anything but he does step back. Next to him is Illumi, eyeing not only you but his little brother. You knew they were brothers because Killua told you, but you never expected to see them in the same room together.

Killua's eyes go wide and Gon is already in a defensive position.

Ilumi takes his attention away from Killua and he leers at you instead. "That was a long trip to the hospital. Did you get lost leaving the building?"

"Hey! Why don't you just leave y/n alone?!" Gon barks at them.

It all happens in seconds, if you had blinked you would have missed it. Killua is slammed into the floor and his head makes a hard 'clunk' sound. Before Gon has the chance to attack, he's throw into a display rack, and tumbles to the ground. Killua is too dazed to react. Hisoka makes sure Gon can't get back up by stomping on his stomach, making him cough up blood.

Your last moment of freedom is spent by watching your friends be beat up. A cloth is pressed against your mouth and nose, and your arms are held behind your back. It smells heavily like cleaning supplies, potent ones. It takes a few breaths before you get dizzy, and until you begin losing control of your body. Hisoka is bent down in front of you and he places a kiss to your forehead.

You wish you knew what he said, but you've already succumbed to unconsciousness. Your freedom is relinquished once again.

#hisoka x reader x illumi #illumi x reader x hisoka #hisoka morow #hxh illumi #illumi zoldyck #hisoka x reader #yandere hisoka #yandere illumi #hxh #hunter x hunter #phantom troupe #yandere

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jackson--t · 3 years

Text

Hate me, adore me.

Part IV

Summary: Ivar is not good with children.

Words: 3.1 k

Warnings: smut, swear words, rude behaviour, a lot of fucks (really).

Tag buddys: @youbloodymadgenius @jadelynlace @punkrocknpearls @neverwantedagony @moonlightsspirit

AO3? here.

Ivar liked many things.

He liked to watch his basketball games on TV, along with a cold beer. He loved Game of Thrones with ramen in his bed, all Sunday long when he wasn't on duty. He loved chocolate ice cream, preferably with lots of colorful sprinkles on top - and he loved good sex.

But on this day, Ivar felt reminded once again of all the things that annoyed him terribly and that drove the absolutely annoyed wrinkles on his forehead already at 7 a.m.; it wasn't just Heahmund's know-it-all attitude, once again, when he had forced Ivar to fasten his seat belt while driving; or the fact that he had once again wanted to forbid him to chew gum. Ivar had ironcladly defied the gum rule: because he needed it. He needed it bitterly so as not to get too upset and to keep his mouth closed as best he could, to have something to do so as not to let expletives hail. Because one of the causes of his bad mood was just waddling across the street at super low speed and was caustic and annoying: children.

Ivar had always successfully avoided having to escort the little buggers across the street in the morning until now - but thanks to Heahmund's terrific, terrible effort and his disgusting good nature as Mr. Jesus, he had been forced to ride with Heahmund to the nearest elementary school even before he was actually on duty, and to go on duty as a fucking friend and helper. His mood was in the basement, more than that.

He cast a scowl down at a small, blond girl who was staring at him with wide eyes; she had her mouth slightly open and was still staring at him when Ivar had turned away slightly. When he noticed, he looked at the girl again; the little girl blinked.

"Are you a policeman? You don't look very nice, do you?" the little girl squeaked, and Ivar rolled his eyes. He loved his job because of the guns, because of the violence, because of the "don't give a shit" attitude he could let out to some - but today was a shitty day. And those little green poison dwarfs didn't make it any better.

Ivar stared at the girl for a moment, then let out a deep and annoyed snort. "Nah, I'm a garbage man, you little devil. Move along before I eat you up."

The girl stopped for a moment in shock, and when Ivar took a faked step towards her, she shrieked and ran towards Heahmund, who was standing just a few feet away, directing the children across the street with a broad smile. Urgh, Mister Perfect. Again.

"Ivar!" echoed over to him, and Ivar chewed his gum in annoyance. He threw Heahmund a rough nod, while the older policeman eyed him indignantly.

"What are you doing? You're not supposed to scare the kids!" he said reprovingly, turning directly back to the little girl who Ivar had scared earlier with a smile.

Ivar wrinkled his nose and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He still couldn't decide what made him feel sicker to his stomach: those little buggers, or that the critters worshipped Heahmund so much it almost looked like a scene from the damn Bible.

It seemed worlds between today and yesterday; endless, endless days since he'd had sex with Heahmund, and for the first time experienced a different side of the cop than his haloed nerd side. Ivar bit his lower lip softly at the thought of their "slip" and stared at Heahmund; he hated to admit it, but that encounter had left its mark on Ivar.

Of course, he would never confess it in his life, not even under torture: but he had easily fallen for Heahmund - at least the part that had fucked him mercilessly yesterday. It had been that unbelievably good sex, that passion that had been there between them - and that sheer tension that had existed between them for ages. They were like fire and water, like night and day - but that's what made it exciting for Ivar. He had almost not been able to look at himself in the mirror the next morning, because he had actually jerked off to that memory twice the night after the "accident" - always that perfect body in front of his eyes, that smell that had been on Heahmund's skin, those damn arousing kisses that had given Ivar more than goosebumps.

And yet he hated him, in a way. The way he stood there, bringing those fucked-up kids across the street, with an angelic smile that sent sheer goosebumps of horror across Ivar's skin; he could hardly stand the way the little fuckers looked at the man like he was the next messiah, while they just eyed Ivar like something they were afraid of. Ivar just stared at a fat kid who was eyeing him particularly challengingly as he jutted his chin slightly.

"What do you want, pug face, huh?" he snarled, and it wasn't a second before Heahmund's voice thundered across the street.

"IVAR, damn it! It’s enough!" Oh, Ivar heard the anger from the raspy voice, that little thread of last, polite restraint guaranteed to snap in the patrol car. He looked at Heahmund, unimpressed, and raised an eyebrow; Heahmund's blue eyes had darkened.

"Would be nice if you didn't play godfather to the fucking lambs for once, so we can get out of here," Ivar retorted snottily, while Heahmund snorted.

"Okay, get in the car. And don't use those damn swear words! Kids, don't listen to him. They call him the Grinch at the station." Heahmund deaclred, amused, while he was immersed in soft children's laughter.

Ivar had had enough. He threw his stupid ladle against the sidewalk and lit a cigarette; he walked the few meters to the patrol car and casually leaned against the passenger side. His lungs were burning, so hard he pulled on the cigarette - but he didn't care. Let the fucking Heahmund shut his fucking mouth! Had he possibly imagined that there was more going on there? Had he possibly jerked off twice on him by mistake? Yes. But that was really just a slip. It could hardly be anything else, after all Ivar didn't go for men like Heahmund. Fuck it, whatever his stupid heart said.

It wasn't fifteen minutes before Heahmund appeared at the patrol car with a more than angry expression on his face; he stared at Ivar for a moment, then nodded roughly in the direction of the car. Ivar flicked his cigarette onto a patch of grass and got in; as they sat in the car, their eyes met. For a moment there was a tense silence, during which Ivar calmly chewed his gum so clearly that Heahmund could see it perfectly; only when he leaned back slightly did Heahmund's deep voice murmur at him.

"Did you just throw a lit cigarette on a lawn there?" he asked, and Ivar looked out the window for a moment. He snorted softly before turning to Heahmund again and putting on a soft, overly friendly smile that was hard to beat for sarcasm.

"I don't know, you should check it out. And maybe pick up trash on the side, and you're guaranteed to go to fucking heaven."

Heahmund's brow furrowed slightly; Ivar saw exactly how his hands curled into light fists, but he returned Heahmund's angry look with the still wide grin.

"Ivar, honestly, you're such a fucking asshole, you know that? I really want to punch you in the face right now. You do realize that throwing away burning cigarettes violates environmental regulations, and most importantly, endangers safety?" he hissed, and Ivar shrugged.

Heahmund looked at him for a moment, then actually got up and went outside to properly dispose of the cigarette. Ivar, meanwhile, stared out the window: he looked at Heahmund's butt, at the broad shoulders, at the handsome face that seemed to curse softly. "You fucking nerd, look at you.", Ivar muttered to himself, catching himself biting his lower lip lightly as Heahmund ran his hand through his black hair: one had to hand it to him, he was just damn good looking.

Ivar was still staring at him, too, when Heahmund sat down next to him again and let out a deep sigh; he leaned his head back for a moment, though Ivar was still looking at him. Something tingled inside him.

"You could... hmm... you could punish me really bad under Section 17b, don't you think? You fucking nerd.", Ivar hummed softly; as Heahmund's blue eyes locked on him, he grinned slightly. And his body was bathed in sheer goosebumps when Heahmund finally turned the ignition key and snorted softly. Ivar knew he was taking him up on his offer when they drove into an area where there were almost no buildings - except abandoned factories. It was almost too good, the tingle that shot through his bones when Heahmund finally parked; and before the older cop could open his mouth and lecture again about any regulations, Ivar's hands had cupped around his face and he was kissing the older man, who, underneath all the hatred and dislike, also inspired terrible and urgent lust in him.

He couldn't even last two minutes in his own seat and had quickly sat down wide-legged on Heahmund's lap. The older cop emitted a slight gasp, almost barely audible, as Ivar's hands dug through his clothes, fumbling with the belt of his pants.

"You're insatiable. And a monster.", Heahmund groaned out between two biting kisses; his hand had long since made its way to Ivar's bulletproof vest, undoing the Velcro and pushing the soft shirt up under Ivar's vest. Ivar loved those warm, rough hands on his torso, and he let Heahmund feel it clearly with a soft moan. His fingers ran desirously urging along Heahmund's zipper on his pants, feeling the thick bulge in them that he was particularly lusting after. Fuck, he was so fucking hot for this guy it was almost embarrassing.

"No foreplay, you greedy grinch? Fuck, Ivar... at least with a condom this time!", Heahmund murmured softly, even though Ivar's hands were already pushing and softly rushing into his pants. When he had the thick and already hard cock in his hand, Ivar exhaled for a moment; he closed his eyes and pressed himself against Heahmund's torso before hissing softly, "Tell me, are you somehow only getting horny when you have protection? You want to maybe leave that fucking vest on during sex too, nerd?"

As Ivar intensified his movements on Heahmund's cock, Heahmund's pelvis clearly moved upward; Ivar sensed him looking at him and opened his eyes.

"Would it turn you on?" Heahmund murmured breathlessly; Ivar opened his lips breathlessly, moving his warm hand tighter and tighter around Heahmund's cock. He loved how the trained cop grew harder and harder, how wet drops of pleasure appeared on his tip, which Ivar easily wiped away with a slight gasp and a nimble movement with his thumb; Heahmund moaned, but they were still looking at each other.

The corners of Ivar's mouth lifted slightly, then he grunted. "Fuck, yeah."

"I knew it. Harder." Heahmund moaned, pulling Ivar's neck closer, covering his neck with warm, smooth, slightly biting kisses as Ivar's hand continued steadily. His own erection was pressing like mad against his pants, and Ivar was so incredibly hot for Heahmund that he didn't take any time. After all, a damn stake could flutter in at any moment.

He unzipped his own pants to the slight groan of Heahmund, pulling them down somewhat awkwardly along with his boxers to the point where he could still practically sit well on top of Heahmund; his body was covered in goosebumps as he watched Heahmund spit into his own hand in one fluid motion, wetting his hard cock with it. Ivar grinned slightly; he wet two of his fingers before sliding them into his entrance with a slightly awkward motion, widening it slightly; the sound that came from Heahmund sent pure pleasure through his body. The two looked at each other.

"Fuck, Ivar. You're such a fucking beast, I swear I'll fuck the hell out of you already."

"Oh, come on - you're into it. You probably only had 0815 cunts that looked pretty but had nothing on them."

Ivar almost whimpered when Heahmund abruptly stopped him from his movements; his fingers slipped out and he was pulled onto Heahmund's lap with a firm and strong grip; he placed himself over Heahmund's cock, moaning slightly as he looked into the dark-haired man's eyes.

"Then let's see how good you can ride, gutter boy!" Heahmund groaned; Ivar's fingers clawed brutally at Heahmund's chin, holding it up as he gently lowered his pelvis and let Heahmund's hard cock slide carefully inside him; he did it deliberately slowly, letting that rock-hard muscle stretch him open gently, loving the way Heahmund's mouth opened slightly, the way his fingers clawed harder into the flesh of his hips.

"Fuck, Ivar!" he moaned darkly, and Ivar jerked his chin up again that had turned shallowly towards his chest - those blue eyes staring at him full of fire.

"Don't call me that! You fucking bastard." Ivar hissed; he whimpered softly as he felt himself sink to the base on Heahmund; they were both breathing heavily, and Ivar pulled Heahmund's face closer to him, pulling the older cop into a biting, hard kiss before slowly moving up and down.

Fuck, damn. It hadn't been enough that Heahmund had been an absolute grenade in bed the last time, no - his cock just seemed made for Ivar's core. It was perfect in thickness, and even more perfect in length, that it was already softly grazing the soft bundle of nerves inside Ivar with every deep movement Ivar made on it. Ivar swallowed audibly and clawed at the back of Heahmund's neck; he loved feeling the pressure of Heahmund's hands on his body, loved the fucking vest he was still wearing, which only further vocalized his fucking nerdiness, which seduced Ivar beyond belief. His movements became steadier, more violent, and he became more and more breathless.

Oh man, this was going to end in an orgasmic disaster. Heahmund was just too good.

They kissed breathlessly, and Heahmund's hands slid up to Ivar's waist; they closed warmly around the arches of his ribs, supporting him in the movements that were becoming more fluid and deeper, even as they took away Ivar's breath. His belly was pleasantly filled with warmth, so full of feeling.

"We can...fuck, Ivar!- ...we could maybe discuss the punishment thing over an evening...dinner. Fuck, you're killing me," Heahmund cursed, and Ivar threw his head back slightly.

He knew he wouldn't last long - but he would definitely not get ahead of Heahmund this time. He knew too many tricks in this position for that. He smiled softly as he let his entrance twitch slightly around the thick cock; it drove a moan from Heahmund's lips.

"Is that a fucking date, Heahmund?" Ivar exhaled, clawing harder at the base of Heahmund's black hair on the back of his neck. The older cop underneath him groaned, and his hands at his waist twitched. Ivar repeated the motions twice before Heahmund threw his head back slightly in his seat.

"Is...no, this is an...on-duty...fuck!... meeting”. Heahmund's voice grew harsher, thirstier, Ivar heard it clearly. It turned him on so much that he himself had to be beastly careful not to come right on top of that hard cock thrusting into his prostate at the perfect angle over and over again; but he was too proud. He held out for a little while longer. But the thought that Heahmund had just asked him for a private meeting chased even more lust into his body.

He was hot, so damn hot inside.

"Sure, you weirdo." Ivar hummed with pleasure, soaking in the taste of another kiss that Heahmund breathlessly gave him; his hands weren't letting go now, and the cop's pelvis thrusting from below was getting a little faster. When their lips parted, Heahmund opened his eyes slightly, seeking Ivar's gaze.

"Fuck, I think I..." he groaned, and Ivar moaned.

"You're coming, aren't you? Come on, you know I want you to...", Ivar breathed against those fucking delicious lips, stealing a breathless kiss before watching Heahmund's eyes close with a powerful wave of heat in his body.

"Fuck, I'm coming..." the cop moaned so harshly that Ivar moaned softly; he clawed at Heahmund's body as tightly as he could, wrapping his heated arms tightly around the body, almost amazed, manically turned on, at how quickly it made Heahmund come, that simple touch.

The man groaned a dark moan right at Ivar's sensitive collarbone, deep and rough as he came jerking inside Ivar. Ivar continued to ride him, riding him hard and demanding until he too felt the violent crashing peak of his orgasm: the wave of pleasure crashed over him so brutally that he had to stop his riding movements to avoid losing control completely. Just like the first time, this orgasm tore out something deep inside Ivar, gave him everything he needed, nourished him with so much love and lust that he almost choked on it.

The windows were fogged the hell up when Ivar broke away from Heahmund after what felt like an eternity; they were able to wipe away the mess they'd both made just fine, because of course the nerdy Heahmund had good tissues with him; Ivar grunted quietly and had to grin a little wryly when Heahmund had to spend a long time wiping at a stain on his black vest, with a quiet, annoyed snort.

"You can tell it's gravy," Ivar said, earning a nasty look from Heahmund after he luckily managed to remove the stain just fine; when Ivar was back in his seat and, to Heahmund's satisfaction, even buckled up for once, Heahmund looked over at him. The two looked at each other, and then Heahmund smiled slightly.

It was a beautiful smile, one that Ivar hadn't seen from him before, and one that made him feel sick in a different way than he did on the road today. As if suddenly, there was something in his belly that fluttered around like crazy and made him almost happy inside. Disgustingly happy.

"I was serious about the... dinner." Heahmund said; the blue eyes sparkled slightly, and Ivar grinned a little wider. He couldn't go soft now, no way - Heahmund couldn't score points everywhere with his nerdy, gentlemanly behavior, after all. "Maybe we'll get along better someday. Get to know each other better." the dark-haired man added, and Ivar turned his head slightly so that Heahmund wouldn't see him blush slightly on his cheeks. He popped a new piece of gum into his mouth and winked.

"Shut up and drive, you miserable nerd. You won't get the Nobel Peace Prize for polishing, too."

But his heart had already said yes, and he also knew, without looking over, that Heahmund knew, too.

#vikings #ff #fanfiction #cops #ivar the boneless #heahmund #heavar #ivar x heahmund

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calcifermovesthecastle · 3 years

Text

Shared Language

Ghiaccio x Florist!Reader, gn pronouns, fluff ending

1000 follower giveaway for @therealcozyy after a million years I’m so sorry

Warnings: kind of angst, hospitalization and IV’s but nothing major

At the end of a busy day, all you want to do is close up shop and trudge to the apartment the floor above you, and collapse into bed. Thirteen Bridal Bouquets, Add on roughly six each for bridesmaids, as well as walkin customers have you frenzied and harrowed and exhausted, your hands aching with the amount of work you pulled today. Annoyance shoots through you when you hear the patronizing ring of the bell, signaling someone new, and you squeeze your eyes shut, collecting yourself before you turn around.

"I'm horribly sorry, but we are closed for the night, so-" Your voice trails off when your eyes graze over the Passione pin glinting on the man's shirt, and you visibly wilt when your eyes travel up to his face. "Of course. How much do I owe you?"

"It's a protection fee. It's not any lower or higher than it's ever been," He responds, looking just as annoyed with the situation as you feel. You sigh, biting your tongue, and crouch behind the counter, skimming the shelves for the envelope you usually keep the fee in.

"Right, here you are. Um, let me count it out just to make sure I have it all, if that's alright?"

His eyes meet yours, narrowing, before he shrugs, resting his hands on the counter. You flip through the bills, organizing them by every fifty euros. He watches you count like a hawk, his eyes flicking to your face when you purse your lips in a particular way and freeze.

"Shit."

You disappear into the back office, and he can see you rummaging around, looking more and more stressed as you go.

"Is there a problem?" He calls after you, an edge to his voice.

"No, no, it's-" You come back out to the front, looking near tears as you open the cash register. Your voice cracks when you speak again. "No, there's not a problem. Give me just a moment."

By the time you've finished counting, there's ten euros left in the register, and tears have started to pool into your eyes. You have to swallow to speak, and when you do, your voice is soft and catches on each word.

"There. Ten-Ten thousand Euros." You recount once more just to make sure it's all there, tucking it back into the envelope and handing it over to him. His eyebrows knit as he glances to your register, and your lip trembles when you speak again. "Now, really, sir, I do have to close up for the night."

Even though he's left your shop, he remains in his car, watching you lean over your desk and cry as you appear to do some calculations. Wordlessly, he drives away.

You're in the middle of arguing with a customer on the price of a standard funeral basket when the bell rings, and one glance over at the door has you panicking.

"Shit, sir, you need to leave," You usher the fuming customer out the door and swivel, your eyes wide, at the man from last night. "Was it not enough?! Are you going to take my-"

"Woah, slow down!" He holds up his hands. "I just- do you want- cazzo," He spits, shoving his hands in his pockets. You shift nervously, hysteria quickly threatening to well up past your throat. "Shit. I saw that you didn't have much left yesterday, so I wanted to- buy you lunch."

You aren't sure if you heard him properly, but when what he says finally registers, your legs crumple underneath you.

You wake to a concerned blue haired man, and a curious purple haired one who's taking your pulse and checking you over for injuries.

"Oh, good, you're awake," The purple haired one smiles cooly, helping you sit up. You press a hand to the back of your head, wincing. "Ghiaccio here called me in a frenzy when you passed out. I'd pass out too if he ever asked me out to eat."

The blue haired one- Ghiaccio, glares daggers at his companion, practically frothing at the mouth, his teeth grinding back and forth. The purple haired one pays him no mind, continuing his conversation with you as if you were old friends.

"I don't think you need to go to the hospital, but my advice is close early and get some rest.

"I- what?" Your mind is still trying to catch up to what's happening- two men from Passione acting so casual with you it's like you've known them for years. You frown, gingerly rubbing the back of your head. Not Ghiaccio chuckles, the corners of his lips quirking up with the action as he repeats himself.

"I- I can't. I can't afford to close early. My rent is due in three days and I have 300 euros. That makes me 1700 euros short and if I'm short again I'll lose my business."

"Have you eaten since last night?" Ghiaccio speaks up, his words harsher than he probably intends. You stare at him blankly.

"No?"

"Do you want to?"

"I-" You glance at the clock. "I would, but…"

"What if we brought you some food back here?" Not Ghiaccio coos, earning a death glare from his companion. You bite your lip, slowly getting to your feet.

"I guess so? If you're offering."

"I'll be back in forty minutes," Ghiaccio ushers his companion out of your shop, and you're left alone to mull over what happened.

True to his word, he strolls back into your shop forty five minutes later, a bottle of water and a box of margherita pizza in hand. He sets it on your counter, biting his bottom lip nervously.

"Are you pitying me?" You ask him quietly, reaching out for the bottle of water, pausing just before you grasp it.

"Since when is doing something nice for someone pitying them?" He looks genuinely taken aback, and you can see anger rising in his face. You decide to let the issue go, opening the box and taking a slice of pizza.

"It's not something you had to do," You take a bite, feeling a little awkward that you're eating in front of him. "But thank you."

He takes a slice of pizza for himself, looking uncomfortably stiff as he eats. You share a tense silence with him, your mind reeling with the possibilities of his presence.

"Are you not enjoying yourself?"

"I could ask you the same thing," You turn to him, pulled out of your funk. "You're standing in my lobby still as a statue, looking like I just gave you the worst news of your life."

"What the hell does that mean?" He snaps, stiffening even more. You cover your mouth to hide the smile forming on your lips. Maybe you could enjoy his company after all.

"It means if your eyebrows knit together any further, you're going to form a unibrow," You take a discreet sip of the water he gave you, laughing when he swivels to face the window, trying to see what you're describing.

His heart stutters when he hears it, the way your mirth sounds so musical and carefree. God, he thinks to himself. He could listen to that forever.

"Hey, listen," You set the bottle of water down, moving around behind the counter for a moment. When you look satisfied, he watches as you come around the counter and present him with a small bouquet, mixed with white clover, pink sweet pea, Hydrangeas, and peach colored roses. "Thank you."

His face burns as he reaches out and takes the flowers, his heart hammering in his chest when his hand grazes yours. You smile gently at him, retreating back behind the counter. He can't find anything else to say, so he gives you a gruff goodbye and leaves your shop, sitting in his car long after he arrives home.

"Who're the flowers from?" Prosciutto looks up from his book, eyebrow raised in question as Ghiaccio enters the hideout. Ghiaccio balks, stammering in a mix of embarrassment and indignation.

"The florist three blocks down. Why do you need to know?"

"Oh? They never give me flowers when I collect their protection fee," Prosciutto hums, tilting his head.

"When's the last time you bought them lunch?" Melone drapes himself over the back of the couch Prosciutto lounges on, grinning coyly at Ghiaccio as he searches for a vase. Prosciutto hums again in understanding.

"Their shop still not doing too well, huh? How much did they have left this time?"

"You make it sound like you want their business to fail," Pesci whines, jutting his lower lip out. "They're always so nice to me when I collect the fee. They'd lose their home if they shut down."

"They had ten euros," Ghiaccio answers, grabbing a cup and filling it with water, setting the arrangement of flowers inside and carrying it to his room. He gingerly places it on his windowsill, tilting it until he's satisfied that it would get the best amount of sunlight. Prosciutto appears in the door, entering without asking and leaning over Ghiaccio's shoulder to peer at the flowers. His mouth quirks up into a smile when he's satisfied and turns to leave.

"What? What's that face for?" Ghiaccio stops him from leaving, his tone demanding. Prosciutto looks too smug for his own good, his eyes slanted downwards as he studies Ghiaccio's form.

"Look up the meaning of those flowers and you'll understand," Prosciutto sidesteps and leaves with a wave of his hand, leaving Ghiaccio fuming.

He had wanted to come by sooner, but unfortunately, got caught up in an odd schedule where he'd travel from job to job, and got stuck in Rome for a month on a hit that only paid One Hundred thousand euros. By the time he'd come back home, he did nothing but sleep and keep up on the paperwork for two days.

The next time he shows up at your shop, you're not there, and the windows and doors have been boarded up. The sign on the entrance says "Gone out of business."

"Shit. Shit, shit, shit!" He kicks the door frame furiously with each swear, earning some strange glances and some comments.

"Christ, man, they weren't even the best florist in town. It's a wonder they stayed afloat as long as they did."

"Heard it was because they couldn't pay their rent this month. Honestly, with how much Passione charges, it's not even a protection fee anymore, it's an eviction notice waiting to happen."

"Honestly, they're just flowers. Why is he so worked up?"

"The person running the shop wasn't even that personable."

The crowd he'd accumulated falls silent when he turns around, his expression nothing less than smoldering. Some furtive glances at his pin, and soon, the street is empty.

He meanders back home, kicking pebbles to the side, glowering at anyone even remotely in his way, and slams the door so hard it almost falls off of the hinges when he arrives, earning a displeased look from Prosciutto.

"What's the matter with you?"

"Where the fuck are they?"

"That's rather vague," Prosciutto lights a cigarette and leans back on the couch, resting his ankle on his knee. "Did you have a hit go wrong, or-"

"The fucking-" Ghiaccio all but stomps over to where his colleague sits, ripping the cigarette from his mouth and taking a deep dreg himself. Prosciutto's brow furrows in annoyance, but he doesn't say anything as he pulls out another from his silver case and lights it. "The florist. They went out of business. Where did they go?"

"Like I should know the answer to that," Prosciutto scoffs, tapping his ashes into the tray on the end table. Ghiaccio follows suit, taking another deep inhale, sputtering when it goes up his nose. Prosciutto huffs again, shrugging. "What am I? A babysitter? I told you they were going to go under."

"Well, who collected their fee last?" Ghiaccio throws himself into the chair perpendicular to Prosciutto, tapping his ashes out. Prosciutto hums.

"Had to have been Risotto. The rest of us were all on hits at the time it's usually collected."

Ghiaccio bolts up, putting out his half smoked cigarette, earning a glare from Prosciutto.

"If you're going to steal my smokes, the least you could do is finish them. These are expensive, you know."

"Then buy a cheaper brand," Ghiaccio retaliates, walking back towards Risotto's office. "We're on a budget anyways, aren't we?"

Just barely in earshot, he can hear Prosciutto telling him to fuck off. Inhaling deeply, he knocks on his capo's door.

"No clue."

"What the fuck do you mean, no clue?" Ghiaccio's voice is nearing hysterics, and he taps his foot fast, his eyes blown wide. Risotto's demeanor doesn't change, he just hums.

"Exactly that. I collected their fee two weeks ago. I was in and out. I didn't even know they were shut down until just five minutes ago, when you burst in here screaming about it."

"Cazzo. CAZZO! Fine, I'll find them myself!"

"You said Melone went and helped you with a fainting spell they had? See if he can help."

"See if that slimy- oh."

Of course.

Of course it had to snow.

You sit against the brick wall of the alleyway, doing your best to ignore the drug deal to your left, and the way your stomach twists painfully.

"Hey! Hey, you!"

You hunker down, your brow furrowed miserably, and close in on yourself a little more to stave off the cold.

"Hey, you, on the ground! Get the fuck outta here. This is my turf!" Your screamer's legs appear in front of you, and you look up at him, dead eyed. "Jeez, you look like real shit, you know? When's the last time you ate?"

"Leave me alone."

"What, not even a hello?" Your perpetrator sneers, crouching to your level. You don't have it in you to even glare. You're too hungry. He scoffs, eyeing you. "Tch. Find somewhere else to starve to death, huh? You're making it hard for me to do my business."

"Do you have to humiliate me any more than I already am?" You sigh, trying to get to your feet. "Fine. Just leave me alone."

You lean heavily on the wall, your legs trembling underneath you. Homelessness has not treated you well, and the stares your emaciated body receive only further your spiral into despair.

You've barely made it to the next alley over when your legs give out, and you collapse face first into the accumulated snow. Hazily, you think to yourself that you have to get something to drink somehow, and pull yourself up, grabbing handfuls and shoving it into your mouth, nevermind how cold you already are, your thin long sleeves and tattered excuse for pants clinging wetly to your body. The only thing you can do now is wish for death to come faster than it does. You fall down onto your side and stare blankly at the opposite wall, willing yourself to fall asleep.

You think you see a pair of legs come to a halt in front of you before you slip into a haze.

When you wake again, a flat white ceiling greets you instead of a cloudy sky, and you notice the weight of a blanket on you. Hazily, you glance over and notice an IV drip hanging out of your arm, and a somewhat familiar blond haired man in a suit sitting next to your bed, smoking a cigarette and absentmindedly reading a newspaper. His eyes flick over when he senses your movement, and his brow shoots up. The paper is set aside, and he takes a generous hit from his cigarette before speaking.

"Good morning. We weren't sure if you were going to pull out of that or not. You've been asleep for almost four days. It's funny. You lose your business, and suddenly, you drop off of our radar. It was quite a chore to find you, you know."

"Are you mocking me?" You croak, trying to pull yourself up into a sitting position. The blond appraises you for a minute, puffing smoke out of his mouth. "Are we in a hospital? I'm pretty sure you aren't supposed to smoke in hospitals."

"I doubt the staff is going to give me a hard time," The man speaks lightly, lounging back. "You certainly are something. You've been awake two minutes and you already have a smart mouth?" A small smile lights up his features. "I guess you could say that you're a trooper."

"I'm starving," You bite your lip, turning away, your eyes widening when you finally place the man. "Shit! You're from Passione! Oh my god, oh, I lost my-"

"I already know that," The man waves you off. "I'm just here to keep an eye on you and take you home once you get discharged."

"But I don't- I don't have a home," You place your thumbnail between your teeth, looking at him anxiously. He dismisses you again, snubbing out his smoke.

"That's why I'm here, kid."

His vagueness annoys you, but one glance at the box of apple juice and ham sandwich on your bedside tray has anything you want to say dying in your mouth, and by the time you've scarfed it down, tears spark at the corner of your eyes, and any animosity towards the gangster has dissipated.

"Thank you."

The blond- he's since introduced himself as Prosciutto, drives in silence away from the hospital, not saying anything to you about where you're going. You fidget nervously in the passenger seat, jumping when he parks the care and tells you that you've arrived.

You're still a little unsteady on your feet, so Prosciutto guides you down the stairs with a hand on the small of your back, and leans across you to unlock and open the door. The minute you step inside, you're greeted with almost everyone who's come to collect your protection fees. The only one missing is the blue haired one who bought you lunch- Ghiaccio.

The...boss… Risotto, as introduced, gives you a quick tour of your new residence, telling you that everything is free range, that he's going to have you take on some of the deskwork in return, and shows you to your room. Inside is a bed and a few changes of clothes in the closet. At this point, you're teetering on the edge of bawling your eyes out, and you can barely choke out a thank you, giving him a wobbly smile. You swear you can see him smile in return.

You're sitting on the edge of your bed that night, fidgeting nervously, your mind spinning 100 miles per hour, when there's a knock at your door. You practically jump out of your skin, and call out a shaky "Come In."

The door creaks open slowly, and there he is, his hands hidden behind his back.

Ghiaccio.

You stand slowly, your eyes searching his face.

"Did you-" You catch yourself, starting towards him hesitantly. He seems just as hesitant as he walks towards you. "Did you make this happen?"

"Not really," His voice is soft and hoarse, and the way his brow is furrowed tells you just how worried he was, but the light in his eyes shows you how relieved he feels to see you in person again. "I just suggested it, really. Sort of… Panicked... When I saw your- your shop-" His voice falters when you reach out and grab his shoulder. Tears are welling in your eyes for what feels like the eightieth time today, and your lower lip trembles when your hand comes in contact with him. He's a little cold to the touch, but it's comforting and refreshing.

"Thank you," You manage. He swallows thickly, revealing his hands and shoving something harshly in your direction. He's beet red now, and looking anywhere but you. You grab it, taken aback, and look down to inspect it.

Now you really start to cry, tears spilling onto the arrangement of Daffodils, Daisies, purple lilacs, irises, and lavender roses. So much said in one little bouquet. A sob expels from your throat, and you look up at him, catching him watching you out of the corner of his eye.

You set the flowers on your bed, stepping forward to wrap your arms around him.

"They're good?" He sounds nervous, and stiffens at the contact.

"They're wonderful," You confirm, your voice thick as you bury your face into his shoulder. His arms wind around you, then, and you can hear the relief in his voice when he murmurs to you again.

"Welcome home."

#Ghiaccio x reader #jjba x reader #jojo x reader #jojo no kimyou na bouken #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #jjba #jojos #jojo's #la squadra x reader #Prosciutto #Ghiaccio #Melone #Pesci #risotto #la squadra

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matryosika · 3 years

Text

shoot me, chapter VI

pairing — changbin x reader

rating — 18+

genre of the overall series — smut, angst, fluff if you squint

prologue chapter I chapter II chapter III chapter IV chapter V chapter VI

word count for this chapter — 4.1 k

warnings — mentions of alcohol and emotional abuse

note — this chapter has no smut in it. still, the love-story gets completely developed here. next chapters will be filled with smut and angst so stay tuned! i haven't read this chapter because i wanted to upload it as soon as possible, so it may contain grammar mistakes. i will check it later since i have to go out with my family to have dinner! <3 hope you enjoy

taglist:@cozyblues @ahgasearmyfan @binnie-m00n @minaamhh @pinkishwen @spilledtee

[changbin's pov]

"so?" you asked him, modeling one of the dresses that you had previously selected from the expensive clothing shop "what do you think?"

she looks like a goddess.

"good" changbin limited to reply. "is that the last one?"

"c'mon you are not helping at all" you grunted, turning around slightly on the mirror to see the full silhouette of the dress "this might be the one, don't you think?"

i think so. i think you look perfect in all the things you have tried on, actually.

"it's alright" the dark-haired man reply "just take that one and let's get this over with"

"jesus, changbin" you whined "you are such a pain in the ass. if you were in a bad mood then you shouldn't have accepted to drive me here so i can buy a dress for the wedding"

you had been in korea for a month and 2 weeks now, your relationship with changbin growing unconciously intimate as you often engage in sexual encounters with him. you wouldn't say the both of you were close, but each day that passed by you could feel how you learned more about him just like he learned more about you too. you wouldn't consider him a good friend, since hostility made a presence every now and then between the both of you, but you had learned to spend time with him without feeling the need to put plugs into your ears and a blindfold to stop acknowledging his existence.

"if you needed help picking a dress" changbin interrupted, standing up from the seat he had been occupying for the last 45 minutes "you should've asked hyejin or ryujin to come and help you out, not me"

"hyejin is busy" you were quick to respond "ryujin had work today and you were the only other person i know that owns a car"

"cabs exist"

"yeah well" you made a pause, swallowing hard "i don't like cabs"

"you could've asked arthur to lend you his private driver" changbin tilted his head slightly.

"i get uncomfortable with strangers" you answered after a few seconds of being completely silent, changbin's gaze making you incredibly nervous.

"really?" he inquired, one of his hands traveling all the way to the pocket of his jacket as he pulled his wallet out. "why won't you just admit that you wanted to spend time with me?"

"fuck no" a grimace of disgust was quick to appear on your face "don't get confused. i would rather be dead than to spend more time with you than i already have to"

"yet you are still here" he teased "maybe i'm not as unbearable as your mind is trying to convince you i truly am"

with lazy steps he took the bunch of dresses that were piled up on the chair next to him, putting them all over his shoulder as he walked to the counter. "what are you doing?" you asked, still wearing the last dress you tried on.

"you are indecisive and i am starving" he said without even looking at you "i don't need to spend another 45 minutes here looking at how much you struggle to pick between 5 dresses, just have them all and pick one when you are alone"

you looked at him in desbelief "do you have any idea of how much just one of them cost? are you stupid?" you almost yelled in astonishment, looking at the figure of changbin slightly turning around to face you.

"i am not stupid" changbin reply "like i said, i am just hungry"

and currently thinking about how beautiful you are looking right now with that look of amazement on your pretty face. if i could, i would buy you the entire world just for you to destroy.

[y/n's pov]

"i will pay every single one of those dresses back before i leave" you mumbled, eating your food as if you had been starving for days "i had money, i didn't need you to come and rescue me as if i was some sort of damsel in distress"

"you were in distress though" he added, taking a sip of the drink he ordered "you took almost 30 minutes just to pick one dress to try on, you are really undecisive"

"yeah well, it's not like i had anywhere else to be" you replied.

"isn't arthur going to have a small gathering at his house today?" changbin inquired "like a pre-celebration of the wedding or something?"

you shrugged your shoulders "i don't know and i don't care. i am just here for the wedding and then i will be finally free"

you kept on eating your plate of food, confused as to why changbin's gaze stayed fix on you. "what, do i have something on my f-?"

"are you leaving right after the wedding?" he asked in a very hostile way, almost as if he had completely forgot that you were not going to stay forever.

"not right after but that's the main reason i came here, yeah" you replied, having a mixture of feelings inside your guts.

you couldn't deny the fact that you missed tsukuba, but living there meant to be trapped in the university dorms 24/7 just studying. but still, the lifestyle you have had for the past time was absolutely something you could get use to it: ryujin, hyejin, going out on the weekends, being free from school, changbin...

changbin?

"i still don't know the exact date though" you added "school doesn't start for me in another months so..."

"how is your life?" he asked, earning a weird look from you as you couldn't quite understand his question "in Japan, i mean"

you sighed. you had thought that living in japan was really good and you felt utterly comfortable living there until you arrived to korea and discovered a whole new life style that you had already learned to love. not only that, but leaving everything here was going to get you a bit nostalgic in the future. "it is great, better than people say it is honestly" you responded as he nodded "i live at the university dorms so life is pretty much everything but rushed. i spend my days at the library studying, i sometimes work as a shadow teacher for like 4 or 5 kids and on weekends i go and visit my mom and her partner"

"your mom got married after divorcing arthur?" changbin followed, just in time as he finished his dish of food.

"uh, it's complicated" you gave him a smile "she lives with someone and she is very happy"

"and are you?"

you were about to answer the question when you felt a pinch on your heart. a month ago you would have replied "yes" without a doubt. you thought you were happy living in japan, you thought you were happy when you visited thea, your mother, and reiko, her girlfriend. you thought you were happy when reiko made you her special coffee and you thought you were happy when they ocasionally visited you on winter nights at your dorm. you thought you were happy when you worked with children and spent time with them. you thought you were happy when you rode your bike from school to work and you thought you were happy when ryejin visited you and your mom on the holidays.

however, you had learned a new definition of happiness here.

"are you?" you fired back.

changbin slightly tilted his head as he laid completely back on his seat "i could be"

"what is exactly stopping you from being happy?" you asked him, intruiged.

"even if i explained it to you" he mumbled "i don't think you will be able to understand it"

"ah, there you are again" you scoffed, slightly rolling your eyes "your god complex has not show all day. i guess you missed it."

"c'mon" he grunted, raising his hand at one of the waiters at the restaurant "let's go somewhere else"

"where exactly?" you laughed "to your place? your car? a motel? jesus changbin, you can't really go a day without fucking, can you?"

"that's not actually what i had in mind" he replied, taking out his credit card as he saw the waiter approaching the table "but i mean if you want to fuck i won't say no"

"you had something in mind?" you asked, faking excitment "for me? you planned something for me?"

"if you want i can drop you at arthur's place right now so he can force you to have dinner with him and his bride. it's up to you"

you weren't really feeling like spending "quality time" with your father, and you also knew that hyejin was probably not going to attent the dinner, so there was no point of you being there. but at the same time, the thought of spending time with changbin doing non-sexual activities was something that it always made you nervous for an unknown reason, and you were feeling particularly nervous today.

"whatever"

the evening went on peacefully and that alone was unreal. he drove you to the center of seoul and suggested to take a walk around the most popular avenues because "the city looked better at night", something you have always believed too.

changbin was attractive and, even though your personalities crashed every damn time, you couldn't deny the fact that there were some sort of intimate bond going on between the both of you since that very first night at the bar. still, you wouldn't accept it. you wouldn't accept that the one person you disliked the most was starting to change your mind.

and you couldn't get yourself to trust him either. you couldn't trust any men, for that matter.

"have you thought about which dress you are going to wear tomorrow?" he asked so casually, his hands inside the pockets of his jacket as his gaze diverted from building to building.

"no" you replied, trying to get back at the trail of thoughts you had been threading since you left the restaurant with him. "have you?"

"have i thought about the dress i am going to wear tomorrow?" he laughed "i don't know, it will depend on which one you lend me"

"i got distracted" you admitted "but i will try on all the dresses tomorrow morning and i will give you the rest of them so you can return them to the store"

"i won't do that" he clicked his tongue "i bought them for you"

your heart skipped a beat after hearing those words and it was everything but pleasent.

"i don't want them"

"you can't reject a gift" he mumbled "that's the whole point of a gift"

"i will sell them on the internet" you threatened.

"do it, at the end of the day they are yours" he gave you a side look while smirking "but i wouldn't sell them if i were you. you look good in them"

"oh so you want to give opinions about the dresses now, huh?" you asked, mildly annoyed "you could've help me back at the store but you chose to be grumpy"

"at least i am helping you now"

"you are unbearable" you whispered.

a bright smile was quick to appear on his face. a genuine smile, as if he was enjoying the conversation. not only the conversation but the whole moment: you and him, walking around the city and talking about something so casual and trivial like which clothes you were going to wear tomorrow or which dress he liked best on you.

and for a moment it felt nice.

you felt safe.

"the red one was pretty" he added. you looked at him confused, once again lost in your trail of thoughts. "the red dress, the one that you tried on last"

"good" you responded "i'll make sure not to wear that one"

"you hate me that much?" he teased while a faint chuckle left his lips.

"oh changbin, you have no idea" deep down knowing it wasn't more than a vile lie.

you looked in the mirror one last time before you heard hyejin calling your name once again "y/n, how long will you take? i need to stop by the bakery to pick up the wedding cake"

"i'll be out in a minute" you replied, noticing how your hands got sweatier by the second.

you were quite nervous, but couldn't really understand why. maybe the sole thought of your father having his "happy ending" made you jealous because you knew that he did not deserve that at all; he didn't deserve the love he had.

the emotional abuse your mother and you suffered throughout your childhood and adolescence was not something that could be fixed in a month or two and you were certain about it. no matter how happy your father was, you couldn't help but to feel jealous about how he never had to suffer like you and your mother did.

and even though you got over your negative feelings towards him, the scars and aftermath of an abusive household still caught up on you: the mistrust, the negativity, the hostility and the lack of commitment were things you had to deal with on a daily basis.

of course he was the one to blame. but you were an adult now, and you were supposed to deal with all those issues by yourself. no one was going to fix them for you.

"jesus y/n, we are running late" hyejin busted the door open "are you ready now?"

"yes" you were quick to respond, grabbing the purse on your bed and trying to quickly divert from your sister's gaze.

"wait" she mumbled, gripping both of your shoulder as you intended to the leave the room "why are you tearing up?"

"i am not" you replied "i yawned"

she didn't look convinced, but still decided not to push any further "i'll meet you in the car, i just have to grab a few things"

you nodded and made your way through the hallway. because of how rushed she was, you didn't have a chance to tell hyejin how gorgeous she looked. she was wearing a golden shiny dress that embraced her body just fine and carrying a maching clutch with it. she was really pretty, maybe the prettiest woman you had ever seen, and not only that but she was also very smart. any guy would be head over heels for her, but she still decided not to engage in a "silly love story" as she called them because "it is a waste of her precious time, and time is money"

you wished you had the same mentality as she did, but you grew up getting educated on how love was portrayed in books, movies and television. it was ironic how you were the first person on earth to deny that love actually existed, but you were still a hopeless romantic after all.

[changbin's pov]

"changbin, are you too far from the church?" haeun, his mother, asked desperately as changbin picked up the phone.

"i'm right outside" he grunted "i told you i was not going to be late"

"we are sitting on the second bench at the left of the altar" the old woman added "hurry up"

changbin hung up the phone and cursed under his breath. the weather today was maybe too nice for his own liking and his clothes were a bit too uncomfortable to be wearing them under the sun.

as quickly as he could, he closed the door of his car and started walking towards the entrance, making sure that the ceremony hadn't started just yet so he wouldn't make a scene.

"did you bring the gift?" jang-yeop inquired as he sat down next to him and changbin nodded "did you also bring your mother the pair of shoes?"

"yes" he responded "how long is this going to take?"

"40-45 minutes?" his father replied "i have no idea, what time is it?"

"7:02 p.m." haeun was quick to answer "now, the both of you shut up"

right after she mumbled those words, music started to sound on the church. changbin, being in a rush to get to his seat before the ceremony started, didn't notice that arthur was already standing up next to the altar and waiting for his soon-to-be wife. changbin's gaze was fixed on arthur, then it diverted into the bride walking down the aisle and then returned to arthur once again. he never thought about marriage or building a family. hell, he never thought about having a romantic relationship that would last longer than a few months actually. but as he grew older, and as he experienced new stuff, he wasn't sure if he still had the same mentality he used to have last year.

to changbin, arthur seemed genuinely happy. his half-lidded eyes along with that bright smile he was wearing indicated that the man was living one of the happiest days of his life. and as changbin witnessed that romantic scene, the question that popped up in the conversation he had with you last night grabbed his attention once again.

what exactly is stopping me from being happy?

and before he could respond himself with words, his eyes had already found the answer: standing on the bench at the right of the altar and wearing that promising dark red dress that could drive any man insane, the woman he never dreamed of looking just as beautiful as the very first day he met her.

not being able to have her completely.

[y/n's pov]

after the ceremony, a big party was held at a very elegant event hall located in one of the tallest buildings of seoul. you were not particularly excited about having to see arthur's side of the family, but you still managed to keep yourself together the whole time.

"you are wearing the red dress" a sudden voice whispered into your ear as you were counting the tables that were still missing their dinner plates, an order given by hyejin. you slightly turned around to meet changbin's breath dancing on your neck and nape, goosebumps filling every single inch of your skin due to the proximity.

"congratulations" you sighed "your vision is crystal clear"

"i have been watching you since the ceremony" changbin added "i can't help but think about how pretty you are going to look when you are taking that dress off for me"

a spark of electricity traveled around your whole body and directly into your core. you immediatly looked around and notice a few people who worked for arthur's company sitting not that far away from the both of us "do you really want to do this here?" you asked "aren't you scared of being caught by any of arthur's friends?"

"are you concerned about that now?" he chuckled "that didn't seem to bother you at the company's elevator"

"c'mon" you whispered, your back slightly pressing against his chest "i have to help hyejin with some stuff"

changbin slightly gripped your hand and guided you to the dancefloor that was crowded with couples dancing around "i am sure that she can handle all of this by herself"

before you could protest, you took out your phone and sent her a message with the information she asked for. you had no idea what changbin was up to, but you still decided to follow him.

changbin positioned his hands on your waist as he gracefully dragged you across the dancefloor, looking for a spot in the middle of the crowd so it would be easier for the two of you to get lost.

"you are spending the night at my place" he mumbled over the slow songs that were now playing. it wasn't a question nor a petition, it was an order.

"yeah right" you chuckled "if you are too desperate to fuck we can do that, but i am not fond of sleepovers"

the thought of you spending the night with him was terrifying, but you would've been lying if you said that you hadn't think about what it would be like to wake up next to his him.

"i wasn't asking" he responded. "tell me when you are ready to leave".

with a swift movement, your whole body was pressed against his, his hands resting on your lowerback as you both swinged from side to side, following the rythm of the song. this was a whole new side of him that you didn't know it existed, and you couldn't deny that you were loving every second of it.

"who thaught you how to dance, huh?" you asked, your gaze fixed on his eyes that looked even brighter because of all the lights adorning the hall.

"there is so much about me that you don't know" he replied.

"oh i know everything there is to know about you, changbin" you scoffed "but let's see if you can keep surprising me"

it wasn't even midnight but people were already starting to get completely intoxicated with alcohol. arthur had spent the night dancing with ara and, after she was done being the unofficial wedding planner, hyejin ended up getting wasted with the small group of friends she invited to the wedding. you, on the other hand, spent the night dancing with changbin and eating your dinner with him.

it was not unusual to see the both of you together since you spent too much time at the company, but tonight it was sort of different. the looks he gave you, the way you two danced for hours on end, the way he was treating you... it felt different, a little bit more personal and intimate. his parents probably noticed this too, since they made a lof of comments about "how happy they were about us being really good friends". if only they knew.

"i think i am ready" you said to changbin after telling hyejin that you were going to spend the night somewhere else. she nodded her head and agreed to say, if asked, that "you were at ryujin's" even when she wasn't invited to the wedding in the first place. you just smiled at her and nodded, not leaving without telling one of her sober friends to look out for her.

"don't worry" the pretty pale girl mumbled "she will stay at my house tonight"

you glanced over to arthur and ara who were still having the greatest time of their lives on the dancefloor, and proceeded to walk away from the party with changbin. "you parents will stay here?"

"yeah, they will leave in an hour or so" changbin replied "i told them that you wanted to go home and that i was going to drive you"

"perks of living alone i guess" you joked.

the walk through the empty corridors of the building felt eerie as the loud sound of the music were still ringing in your ears. even though you were walking on your own, you could still feel changbin's ablazing touch on your body and that only provoked your heartbeat to go even faster.

as you waited for the elevator to open their doors, changbin's lips unexpectedly crashed against yours. it wasn't a passionate kiss, and it wasn't rushed either. it was just a kiss, an innocent kiss, a kiss you give to your significant other as a demostration of how much you love them. his soft lips dragged against yours as his teeth bite softly your bottom lip, earning a small whine from you. his hands, that were now located into your waist, guided you to the insides of the elevator once the doors were opened.

"you look so beautiful tonight" he whispered interrupting, his breathing getting faster each second that passed by "i can't get you out of my head"

his lips left yours to meet the sensitive spots on your neck, peppering soft kisses all over the surface. your gaze found the reflection of the scene in the mirror of the elevator, looking at how changbin was tasting every inch of your skin with his eyes closed, his rushed hands traveling all the way from your waist to your lower back trying to memorize every single trace of your body.

"i don't want to hurt you tonight" he continued "no roughness, no pain, no petnames. i want to make you completely mine, in the most pure way"

and for the night, you agreed to let your feelings out and let go.

no fear and no mistrust, you were ready to face the overwhelming feelings that had been building up inside you since the day you met him.

even if you could potentially regret it later...

#stray kids smut #skz smut #stray kids x reader #changbin x reader #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #skz oneshots #stray kids oneshots #seo changbin smut #kpop smut

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years

Text

"....So I Married A Monster" *Part 9*

Chapter 8

Chapter 10

[I imagine this is him being a 'dad', lol]

Sorry this took so long ya'll. I love you.

I did my best!

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@shittanyy

@mrsrafaelbarba

@word-scribbless

@storiesofsvu

@believinghurts

--------------

“Ma’am, you really need to calm down--” A nurse pulled you back into the bed while you continued to scream and cry.

“No, I need to know where they’re taking that man!” You screamed as you wriggled from her grasp.

“Most likely to surgery, ma’am,” The doctor explained. “He did just get a GSW to the chest--”

“Oh God,” You wanted to vomit. “But the-- the man who just left, he--” You suddenly had an epiphany of where Billy was headed.

“You have to get officers to 5237 Lakeview Shore Drive,” You said in a panicked voice. “He’s going to grab my children,”

“Aren’t they his children as well, ma’am?” The nurse gave you a look.

“He has NO right to them!” You gave her an exasperated look. “And seriously? You think a man who just murdered two--” No, you couldn’t think that way. Rafael was still alive, he had to be.

“Shot, two men,” You corrected yourself. “Deserves children?!”

“No, ma’am,” She shook her head. “Sorry, ma’am. He was just so kind and charming the last time he was--”

“Jesus Christ, are you really that starved for affection that a psychopath flirting with you is the highlight of your career, idiot?” You sneered at the girl who couldn’t have been more than 19. Just a candy striper-- of course Billy would go for her.

“Alright, Addie-- out,” The doctor pointed towards the door. “Make yourself useful and call 911,”

“But there’s already--”

“OUT,” The doctor barked once more. Addie rolled her eyes and stomped out of the room.

“I’m sorry ma’am,” He apologized, patting your shoulder. “You need to stay calm, we’ve stopped your bleeding and stitched you up, but if you become hysterical you could rip them out,”

“I just watched my ex-husband shoot the love of my life and then storm out of here to go kidnap my children, and you expect me not to get hysterical?”

“At least try, ma’am--” He pleaded with you.

“If you call me ma’am one more time I swear to God--” You growled.

“I’m sorry, Miss Y/N,” He corrected himself.

“Doctor you’ve just sewn up my literal anus, I think we’re on a first name basis,” You rolled your eyes.

“Right,” He chuckled nervously. “Listen if you promise to at least attempt to stay calm, I will go check on your boyfriend, alright?”

“Fine,” You sighed.

“Alright then,” The doctor gestured to two male nurses. sending them to find out information on Rafael.

---------

Rafael was indeed being rushed into an operating room, his chest bleeding profusely. It had missed his aorta, but just barely. One wrong movement by a scalpel and he’d die right on that table.

“...He’s lost a lot of blood already, doctor,” One nurse warned.

“Put him on bypass, I need more time to cauterize this wound!” The doctor barked as he sweat through his surgical scrubs.

“Yes sir,” The nurse nodded to someone who brought forward a machine and began hooking it up to Rafael.

“Alright people, we don’t have a lot of time,” He looked around the room.

"Pray for a miracle,"

-------------

At Your House

Lewis rushed into your house, trying to think of what to do. He’d need to get the girls and run-- it wouldn’t be easy. He’d need a good excuse. God, what would be a good excuse?

Lewis first went to Maggie’s room, gently waking her up.

“Mags? Maggie, wake up baby,” He cooed.

“What’s wrong dad?” Maggie asked while still half asleep.

“We-- we need to go,” He told her.

“Right now?” She turned her head to the side like a confused puppy.

“Yes, right now baby,” He began to grab her things and shoving them into her backpack. “Mommy’s in trouble,”

“In trouble?!” Maggie suddenly shot straight up in her bed.

“It’s fine, I’m sure she’ll be fine,” Lewis tried to keep her calm. “I just don’t want that bad man to get ahold of you and Kylie,”

“He has her?!” Maggie suddenly had panic in her voice.

“Maggie calm down, okay sweetie?” Lewis put his hands on her face. “We can’t let Kylie know, okay? So we’re going to tell her…”

“We’re going to the beach!” Maggie suddenly finished his thought. She was a great liar, quick on her feet. Just a chip off the ol’ Lewis block.

“Great idea baby!” He nodded while she pulled a jacket over her pj’s.

“And-- And we can go to the beach house, the one we used to go to?” She made that adorable little puppy dog face he couldn’t resist. He didn’t exactly “own” that beach house, but whatever his baby wanted, she got.

“Yes, yes of course Mags. Whatever you want sweetie,” He kissed the top of her head before they went into Kylie’s room.

“Kylie, wake up,” Maggie shook her awake while Billy began packing her a bag.

“Where are we going?” Kylie asked sleepily.

“We’re going to the beach baby,” Billy told her as he finished with her suitcase.

“In the middle of the night?” Kylie rubbed her eyes while Maggie helped her put some clothes on.

“Well, we want to be there as fast as we can!” Maggie continued to spin her web of lies, just like her daddy.

“Where’s mommy?” Kylie rubbed her eyes while Billy slipped her shoes on and they headed to the car.

“She’s uh…” He looked at Maggie.

“She’s still a little sick, so she’s going to meet us there later,” Maggie told her while giving her dad a thumbs up. He could cry in pride right now if he wasn’t worried about the cops finding them before he could escape.

“Okay,” Kylie just went along with the story, no questions asked.

Billy went to your key ring and grabbed your keys to your SUV, shooing the girls out into the car. He did a quick look around to make sure he had everything. Well, he had everything that mattered. His girls.

He glared around the room for a moment, pissed off that you had taken away your chances at happiness in this place. It would have been a great life; just him, you and the girls. No cops, no dumbass ADA, just you and him.

Well, soon enough it would be. He was sure Barba was dying right now, if not already dead. Then once he was out of the picture, you’d have no choice but to come back to him. He had the girls. He had your car. He had your happiness.

And soon, he would have you.

------------------

At The Hospital

The nurses had been forced to knock you out with some morphine when you began to get hysterical over not knowing what was going on with Rafael and your girls. So here you were, waking up groggy and disoriented in a regular hospital room. Soon enough you were alert and back on the anxiety train. You pushed on the CALL NURSE button rapidly until an older woman in green scrubs came rushing in.

“Y’Know that button is for actual emergencies,” She crossed her arms once she noticed you were fine.

“This IS an emergency,” You crossed your arms right back at her. “I asked to hear about my family, and all you people did was knock me out. That has to break some sort of law,”

“Really and what law would that be?” She raised an eyebrow.

“I...don’t know, but I’m sure my boyfriend could find one,” You huffed.

“Highly unlikely ma’am,” She shook her head.

“Why?” Your eyes went wide. “Why wouldn’t he? Is it because he’s dead? Brain dead? Paralyzed and unable to speak?!”

“No honey,” She rolled her eyes at your dramatics. “It’s just an insane notion,”

“...Whatever,” You muttered while she checked your IV’s and stats. “So are you going to tell me how he is? Or are you just here to shoot me up with more morphine?”

“Well, that depends,” She said while inputting your information in her iPad. “Can you keep calm, make sure you don’t rupture any of your stitches?”

“....Not with that tone I can’t,” You didn’t like it one bit. “But I think I deserve to know what’s being done about my children at the very least,”

“Well…” The nurse looked at the door nervously. “See, sweetie here’s the thing--” She walked over and made sure the door was fully closed.

“Oh God,” Your voice trembled.

“It seems your ex-husband has...taken them” She grimaced.

“Oh god,” You repeated. “Oh GOD,” You were going to be sick.

The heart monitor and machines began to beep as your blood pressure skyrocketed, bells and whistles went off as you started to have a panic attack. The nurse instantly started turning all of them off, not wanting to alert anyone of what she had done by telling you.

“Okay okay but LOOK, honey--” She grabbed you by your shoulders, forcing you to take a breath and look at her.

“....If I bring you someone, will you promise to calm down?” She asked.

You weren’t entirely sure you could make that promise, but if it was Rafael she was going to bring you, you’d say anything she wanted to hear.

“Yes,” You nodded vigorously. The nurse nodded back and walked to the side of your bed that had a curtain separating you and another patient. When she pulled it back, you saw Rafael laying in a hospital bed hooked up to wires and tubes, a breathing apparatus on his face. She pushed the bed over so that it was touching yours, almost like it was one big king bed for the two of you.

“Oh my god…” You whispered, barely able to hold it together. “Can I--?”

“Be gentle,” She warned you. You nodded softly before very cautiously stroking the side of his face, whispering to him.

“Baby, I’m here…” You pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I’m here and I’m okay, so you have to be okay, okay?”

“How bad is it?” You looked up to the nurse.

“Well he made it through surgery,” She gestured to his still living body. “That’s always a good sign,”

“Give it to me straight...Marla,” You read her name tag.

“It was touch and go for a while, I won’t lie to you,” She sighed. “But...he’s been stable long enough I convinced them to let me bring him here to you,”

“....Thank you,” You gave her a small smile.

“If it were my Jonas in that bed, I’d never want him out of my sight either,” She smiled at you.

“Nurse Nightingale,” A doctor popped his head in. “Your husband is on line 1,”

“Speak of the devil,” She chuckled, heading towards the door. “I’ll be back to check on you later, I’ll-- see what I can find out about your children,”

“God…” You shook your head and muttered under your breath again.

“I’m sure they’re fine honey. They’re with their daddy at least, right?”

“True,” You nodded with another small relieved smile. If there was one thing you could bet money on, it was that Billy would take care of the girls. He was using them as collateral for sure, but he wouldn’t hurt them.

Would he?

---------------

Meanwhile

Hours and hours had passed. Billy had made it to the Hamptons with the girls. Luckily for him the people he was ‘borrowing’ the house from still hadn’t made an appearance. Given that it was the beginning of fall and the season was over, he was pretty sure he wouldn’t have to kill anyone to keep them staying there a secret.

The girls were in the living room watching Moana while Billy scrolled through his phone at the latest news blurbs and trending things on Twitter. Obviously “William Lewis” was out in the open again-- shit. People would be looking for him now. But nobody knew where they were-- they’d never find them. Right? He couldn’t go back to prison, not after the hell he went through to get out. He would never go back again, no matter what. Nothing was going to stand in his way, or slow him down. He intently watched Maggie and Kylie-- they were laughing and eating cereal. Maggie could hold her own for sure, but Kylie was just a tot. Could she handle being shuffled around the state? The country?

He seriously began to ponder if the girls were slowing him down.

#rafael barba #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba fanfiction #william lewis #william lewis x you #william lewis x reader #william lewis angst #william lewis fanfiction #rafael barba angst #william lewis imagine #so i married a monster

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911porno · 2 years

Text

Dear Journal,

I need to manifest. So i’m back again and Im finally going to air out everything that i’ve been thinking, or have been thinking about. I don’t even know if any of this shit is going to make sense but it doesn’t even matter. just type h0w you feel. now lets start with why i feel like i’m stuck. in the same spot. I feel like everything is just so mundane. when I wake up in the morning I get ready and immediately have to do a video. Most of the days I don’t even want to do that, but i promise you im not being ungrateful. It’s just., i feel like ive finally reached the point of no return when it comes with “creating content.” i don’t have the drive for it as much as i used to because I finally have what ive been wanting for my whole entire life. I have a record deal! and it just sucks because now that i have what ive been longing for, i don’t have the money to keep up with it. why is it that talent doesn’t matter anymore? Its all about how much money you have and how you can pay your way to the top. I hate that shit. Like??? not everyone has fucking money to do that. but its okay, because I know my angels have been sending me signs thru my angel numbers. So they’ve been letting me know in their own ways that i need to just keep going. And i will. IT’s just hard sometimes and thats exactly why i had to get my journaling out. In any way that I could think of., Anyway i really do hope and pray that some more money comes in. I’m very grateful and happy that the angels sent me that gift from wells fargo. So a few years ago I had a wells fargo bank account, and then i closed it. but for some reason they sent me a check TODAY and told me that theyre sorry for their inconvenience. Kind of wild, but i’m not going to ask any questions. So I am happy .,.thanks angels. I hope that I can land a brand deal because I reallllly need one. The livestreaming thing for “gifts” isn’t the only thing i should be doing. I need to find ways to bring in more money. I’ll have to start trying to reach out to brands with a full schedule on how I think we should work together and the budget they could give me. I’ll figure this out. because I always do. I’m strong, I’m resilient, and I am that girl. I’ve got this. But now that I’m done going over that, I have another thing I’d like to talk about. And that is my “friend”. You see i put that in quotations because she’s literally starting to annoy me. I feel like I’ve checked out of that friendship for a while now because all she does is talk about her boyfriend. It’s like she wants to put our men in a competition again her boyfriend ., i promise you girly.. nobody wants your man. first of all hes not even cute. you send him into the group chat saying hes so hot like we’re all suppoosed to agree with you?? why?? why would you do that? none of us do that in the chat. and also, none of my friends talk about their boyfriends as much as you do. its literallly the most annoying thing she does. this girl literally talks about her boyfriend every second of the day and if we’re not talking about him, she literally finds a way to sneak him into the conversation and im literally done with it. i want to tell her about herself but i dont want to be the bad guy in chatt. but im serious. ive had enough. and lets not forget the fact that he cheated on her.... and the worst part is he did it ONLINE. how you gonna cheat on ur gf on the internet bruh... first of all how did she find out??? going through his phone like an insecure girly... im cant relate and im so glad. but i need to figure out why im so mad when she talks about him. it cant be because i want her man because i dont... so cross that off the list. i dont like her ...you know..more than friends.. because thats just weird. although i thought about it beofrre. idky. but i regret that. and im startting to think that maybe its because im too afraid to show my man in the chat? mostly because i don’t want them to judge him. hes so cool and hes so cute to me. so im not about to sit here and let some girl who i dont even like that much talk shit on my man when hers cheated on her, so im not even going to risk it. shes so annoying bruh...she talks shit just like me, but is worse. she said she will never date someone fat. just shallow. its the worst type of person. my man is so good to me, and hes doing everything in his power to make sure he gets to keep me. because i am a prize. hes literally bettering himself and getting healthier because he wants to make sure hes around for a long time (health wise) and he probably wants to make sure he looks good for me. just like i make sure i look good for him. but anyway im so close to cutting that “friend” off but then she comes in the chat being nice to me on other days and starts talking about things that WE CAN ALL CONTRIBUTE TO in the chat and that makes me not want to cut her off. so i don’t really know what i want to do. but i do know that i feel better. and i also know that nobody in the chat wants her man i promise. so stop showing him and talking about him to us. just leave that between YALL. i promise you’ll be okay. shes just afraid of having a boring life or something. idk but im not the one. and i actually do feel better now that i’ve typed this. wow. journaling actually does help. lol i’ll try to be back tomorrow ;) xoxoxo <333333333333333333333333333

#journal #journaling #dear journal #post #newpost #personal #drama

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hayleygray08 · 3 years

Text

You are my home.

Introduction: this is my first writing on here. Bare with me.

Summary: you are a new member of the team after tony finds you in a hydra raid. You are shy, reserved, and not very talkative at first until you realize the team is not going to hurt you. Once comfortable you show them your powers and fall for a certain super soldier, again.

I used google translate for words in Russian, so if the words are wrong. I apologize.

In my writing, no one is dead.

Pairing: bucky x reader, everyone else is platonic.

Genre: fluff, anguish, mentions of torture, blood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am crouched in the conner,on the floor of my cell waiting for the guards to come get me. My daily training. More like torture.

They make me train as hard as I can and if they think I am slaking, I get a few thousand jolts of electricity shot through my body. Or even a few punches.

Yesterday was one of the worst days so far, that I can remember. I was getting random images flash inside my head, almost from a past life from what I saw, which made me loose focus quite a bit. In return the men who watch me train were heavy with the electricity jolts and even harder punches, anywhere they could land on my body. So, I was not looking forward to today's training.

I don't have a clock or windows in my cell but I knew every time they would come to get me. Like my body knew the exact moment every day. So when that time came and I was still in my cell I was growing a little worry. They are never late, sometimes early, but never late. Just then a siren rang out and the lights dimmed then went red. Was that the alarm for an intruder? How is that possible?

As a million thoughts ran through my head at what could possibly cause the alarm to go off. A very vivid picture or memory came to me and played on repeat. It looked to be the 40's, on a dock or a pier, I was laughing and looking out at the water. There were two guys with me. One was small, blonde hair, blue eyes, and had a small smile on his face. The second was bigger then the first, had brown hair, bright blue eyes, and laughing with me. Why do they look familiar? Why do I have two names on the tip of my tongue? Who are they? Just as I was about to say those names my cell door was blown off and there was a cloud of dust.

As the dust settles and I can properly see, there is a man in a red and gold suit of metal. He walks towards me as he says "Cap we got someone here. She looks no older then 24, covered in bruises, and looks terrified.""Yes, I'll make sure to get her out.""No, I can't tell if she is dangerous." He sighs and crouches down so he can look me in the eyes.

"Hi, I am Tony Stark, and I am going to take you away from here." Tony says and offers me a hand. I take it cautiously and follow him out the door and eventually outside.

Once we made it outside I take a deep breath. It felt so good to get clean air. I don't even remember the last time I was outside. Must have been years. I had to shield my eyes, it was so bright out. I didnt notice more people joining us. I was to busy looking at my hands and arms. Was I always this pale? I look up at the guy who took me away, Tony, and then darkness.

Tony catches me before I could hit the floor and runs into the jet. He lays be on a table and Bruce starts an examination. Nobody dared bother him. Nat hands Tony a flash drive and sits back down with the others.

While I was unconscious and now in the medbay at the compound, I was getting more images. Some are to fast to register what it was and some stayed a good while showing me a life I do not remember, but wish I did. Also things I did, hurting people, a chair, and training. It was all to much. To much pain, suffering, lose. I could feel myself have a panic attack. Which alerted everyone.

I jolted up into a sitting position clenching my chest and taking big gasps of air. My heart monitor going off like crazy. I looked around frantically, not recognizing where I was. I tried to rip out the Iv's but a pinching sensation in my shoulder makes me stop. I look up and see a women, before I am unconscious again.

Meanwhile in the common area Tony, Steve, Natasha, Wanda, Sam, Clint, Vision, Bucky, Bruce, Thor, Loki, Scott, and Peter all sat around looking at my file.

"Her name is y/n, y/ln. She was born in 1918, lived in Brooklyn, New York. Was taken by Hydra in 1946 while she was working on a S.H.I.E.L.D mission. Hasn't been seen since. Until about 2001 when she was spotted riding a motorcycle from a crime scene. Looked to be an assassination. Then again in 2003, 2005, 2007, 2012 and the last time in 2014. So the last time was 7 years ago. It shows she was trained like the winter soldier, but never met one another. But her powers got out of control and they have been training her to keep them in control since 2014. She has assassinated 6 men, 4 women, 2 children, and 1 hydra agent in a training gone wrong on that one." Tony reads outloud to everyone.

Steve and Bucky look at each other with a look in their eyes, as if they can't believe it. Then Tony brings up a picture of me for the group to see. Everyone gasps as a few photos show up. One is me, Steve, and Bucky at Coney Island. Then one of me and Bucky smiling at each other. Then there is one of me and Peggy Carter. Once all pictures are shown, all eyes are on Steve and Bucky.

"You know her?" Asked Natasha. Everyone silently asking the same thing.

"Yes, we know her. She was our friend. She grew up with us. She was our best friend. And a little more to Bucky." Steve answers quietly, looking at Bucky. It has been 78 years since he has seen her.

As they tell the others about me and what they remember, I am waking up again at the medbay. This time more calm. The nurses and doctors where asking me questions but I wouldn't answer them. They could tell they were not going to get anywhere with me, they called Tony and Bruce. I still would not talk to them.

How could I trust them? I don't even know them. For all I know they could be Hydra as well. With all these images popping up I don't even know what to believe anymore. Both men were throwing question after question at me. I didnt know how to answer. Or if I even should. Once they realized they were not going to get anywhere they left.

By the time I got the okay from the doctors, I was put inside a cell. Something I am all to familiar with. But this one was clean, had a comfortable bed, running water, and was warm. All the walls were glass and I could see people standing around watching me. Two I kinda recognized due to the images that I get. Each one would ask a question, each time I just stared ahead.

"We want to help you." A women with red and blonde hair spoke up after a few minutes of silence. I laughed.

"You want to help me? You don't even know me. How can you help me?" I responded quietly.

"Wanda has some powers and is able to look inside your head. Put the pieces together for you. Help you remember." The same women responded looking at another women with red hhai. I am guessing is Wanda.

"We read your file, y/n, let us help you remember the things they have taken from you." Tony says as he walks around. I don't respond, just look at everyone.

They gave up after 3 hours of silence from me and them asking questions. They leave me alone until a few days later. For those days they would bring me food, check to see if I am okay, then leave. It was Wanda, Tony, Bruce, and Steve that came a few days later. I watch them as they open the door to my cell and take a seat on a bench.

"If you are okay with this, we would like to try something. It does involve bringing back everything Hydra took from you. It might be painfull. But we think you should have the choice in remembering your life."Tony speaks up after a few minutes of silence.

Do I trust these people to try and help me? Do I even want the help? To remember all the pain I have caused and I life I will never get back.

I look at the four people in front of me and when I looked at the blonde man named Steve a memory came to me. It was just us two in a tent that looked to be on a base of some sort. He was the way he is now bigger then the other one I have seen. As if he grew or got on steroids. He was telling me about someone but it was fuzzy but I had this feeling of sadness.

I take a big breath in and look at them. "What do I have to lose? Not like I am going anywhere anytime soon." I tell them as I look at my hands.

I didnt see Tony nod at the door but did hear it open. I look up to see a young girl, with a different wardrobe then the others. She smiles kindly at me as she sits next to Wanda.

"Hi, my name is Shuri. I am from Wakanda and I can help you remember." I just stare at her.

"How long will this take?" I ask quietly.

"Depends on the damage they have caused for you to forget everything. Could be a few days, weeks, months. If you have trigger words. We will make.."

"Trigger words? What does that mean?" I interrupt her.

"Words that change you into a different person. Like they did witht he winter soldier. When we got the files from the base you were held in, shows you do have some." Tony says to me.

"Oh, so then I guess we should start this thing." I tell them. They did not expect me to say that.

They step out of my cell and start to say 6 words in Russian.

"девять- nine"

"машина-car"

"цветок-flower"

At this word I started to feel a crawling sensation run across my skin. I started to blink rapidly, my vision was getting foggy.

"слива-plum"

"банан-banana"

Now I'm rolling my shoulders, flexing my hands, shaking my head. That crawling sensation is getting thicker, heavier.

"рок-rock"

Once that last word was said I stand up, look at them with a blank expression, and cock my head to the side a little. "готов подчиниться- ready to comply."

They ready the words and I am me again. Well the shell of me that I know. I sit on the bed and take deep breaths. I did not like the feeling of having no control.

They watch me before they leave me alone for a little bit. I don't remember those words but it felt like my body did and it hurt badly.

As i sit and then pace and sit again for I don't know how long, everyone else is in the common area trying to figure out what to do next.

"Her words are different from Bucky's, why?" Same asks as they watch me in my cell.

"They made the words unique for that person. Hers are more girly because she is a girl and what she likes. They make it so only one person gets triggered and not all at once." Bucky says with a frown.

As they continue to talk and see the next step. I am going a little crazy in my cell. I started to throw everything that I could, I tried breaking the walls, the floor. I was screaming, crying, and bleeding. No one knew of my powers because it was not put in any files. So when I fall to my knees and scream everything shuts down and I pass out.

Once the lights were out, they were up and running to my cell. As people in the building were trying to get the power back on.

When they get to me I was laying on the floor and covered in some weird goo. That started right as I hit the floor. Bruce went to check if I was okay and when he tried to check my pulse he got shocked. He steps away and goes to the others.

"This is not in her file, didnt show if she had powers or not. Why would they do that?" Natasha says as the nurses come in hazmat suits.

"Because she is more dangerous then we thought." Steve says sadly.

*********

That is part 1. Possibly a part two.

#bucky barnes #bucky x y/n #the avengers #bucky barnes imagine #marvel

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orionwhispers · 4 years

Text

Tear In My Heart // Alfie Solomons

(A/N - hehe im back. im working on a bucky oneshot and a tommy series but both of them are super long and i wanted to take a little breather. this was supposed to be a drabble but you know me... ive got a few more ideas for shorter imagines like this with tommy and alf, requests are open! hope you enjoy. pls reblog and comment. love u see u soon xoxxo - also this is like the smuttiest thing ive written even though its not explicit but wow who am i)

warnings: violence, mention of fights and blood, protective alfie, heavily implied smut, lots of terrible language.

You knew something was wrong when Ollie practically crashed through the door. He took off part of the frame and made the hinges tear from the wood, nails and screws clattering onto the ground. The afternoon had been wonderful, perhaps too wonderful, and as always, real life found a way to shatter your rose tinted glasses.

It was starting to fall into autumn, the air chilly but comfortable, the streets slick with rain and the leaves turning into a sweet, buttery caramel all around you. The house was silent save for the birds singing in the trees and the rattling whip of the wind against your windows. The quiet was a perk of having house out in the country, far away from anything and anyone. Just the way he liked it.

Because to him, all he needed was his girl.

Well, and his dog.

The sun had barely risen when you got up - much to your husbands protests. You felt him stirring from beside you, a solid wall of warmth as he snaked his arms around your waist and pressed sleepy, half drunk kisses onto your spine. You laughed tiredly as his hands curled over everything they could reach, long calloused fingers roaming against your bare skin. He grumbled as you swung your legs from under the duvet and onto the floor, throwing on his white cotton shirt and letting it fall to your knees, trying to ignore the threats he was mumbling about what he was going to do to your boss for making you come in so early.

He made one last feeble attempt to grab you, exhaustion clouding his brain so he could do no more than swipe at the top of your thigh, making you laugh at his wandering hands.

“Stay.” He said, voice raspy and muffled by his pillow.

“No.”

“Yes.”

“I can’t.”

“You can.”

“Alf.” You sighed playfully, grabbing your strawberry slip dress and beaded heels and fur coat, darting into the bathroom to wash up and change. Through the noise of the running water you could hear the bed springs creak as he shifted, the entire frame groaning almost as much as him. Cyril watched you with his big chestnut eyes from the doorway as you fluffed up your hair and patted on coffee coloured lipstick, pinching the apples of your cheeks for a little flush.

You rummaged through your handbag as you made your way to the bedroom door, lost in your thoughts until you heard him speak, all low and gravelly and sending shivers up your spine.

“Oi. C’mere you.”

You rolled your eyes but walked into his outstretched arms, his body completely slumped and covered in thick duvets and pillows, just his tattooed skin and coarse, tousled hair poking out from underneath. He pulled you close into him, smelling like green apples and rum and sex and sea salt, like home. He mumbled something that you couldn’t quite make out, the sun starting to shine through the cracks in the curtains and as you started to get up he tugged you in tighter, placing messy, sloppy kisses down your throat and onto your collarbones.

You smacked his shoulder, grabbing his jaw and holding it still, placing a kiss on his lips, feeling him smile against your mouth.

“Bye, my love.”

“Hmph.”

You made it halfway down the hall before you heard: “Fred is driving you. Don’t even bloody think about walking alone at this time.” Followed by grunts and groans and finally deep, throaty snores.

———————————————————-

You accompanied your boss to a few meetings, taking notes and helping him check stock. After a few hours filled with cinnamon lattes and finger cramps and ink stains, he took you aside at the office and gave you the rest of the day off. You were a little suspicious, and had a feeling his good deed might have had something to do with your slightly intimidating husband, but you accepted it nonetheless and headed to Camden after lunch.

The air was brisk and you pulled your scarf tighter around your throat, dodging puddles and fat droplets of rain as they dropped from the trees. You stopped off at a little cafe on your side of town, buying turkey sandwiches, a garden salad and a platter of seasonal fruit, ignoring the fried sugar donuts and sausage rolls and thick, crispy cuts of bacon. A routine check up to the doctor had lead to Alfie being told that perhaps a healthier lifestyle would benefit some of his ailments, so despite his grumbling and childish ways you were doing your best to make sure he was eating his five a day - no matter how much he protested.

But at the last second you grabbed a cherry jam donut. His favourite.

The rain had become torrential by the time you left, the clouds morphing into a block of ashen, sooty grey, teetering on black. Once upon a time the impending storm would have made you feel nervous, the rattling trees and flashes of lightning had been the reason for many sleepless nights when you were a child, but now you looked forward to it.

Because now it meant something different. You, Alfie and Cyril curled up in bed, the fire roaring and flickering a brilliant orange gold. Your husbands arms tight around you, squeezing softly every time there was a clap of thunder, his kisses warm and protective across your throat, knowing that he’d never let anything hurt you. Drinking tea spiked with rum and playing cards, listening to the rain against the windows, feeling the white burst of lighting every time it struck the sky. Falling asleep next to each other, Alfie always waiting for you to doze off first, unable to sleep unless he knew you were alright.

You had once hated storms, and now you wished for them.

Your umbrella was totally battered by the time you got to the bakery. The bottom of your dress was damp from puddles and your shoes were on their last legs, the satin ruined and black with mud, but you didn’t care, walking through the side entrance with a smile bigger than the moon. A few of the old boys saw you instantly, straightening up and grinning at you, welcoming you with whisky soaked aprons and calloused hands. Back when you and Alfie started dating he had all but forbidden his staff from looking, talking, or even thinking about you, but over the years you had formed a close relationship with his workers - something about your warmth and light easing up the darkness. At first Alfie huffed and puffed about it a little, but he couldn’t exactly blame his men for loving you - he was a perfect example of how you brought a strong man to his knees after all.

“Is he upstairs?” You asked George, one of the distillers. As soon as he nodded you left, your heels clicking against the cool basement flooring. You didn’t bother knocking as you approached the big, intimidating door to his office, instead just grabbing the brass lion head knob and twisting it, hearing the hinges whine in protest.

“What the fuck?” His voice was as deep and rumbling as a low tide, his tone so dark and sharp that it might have scared you, if you didn’t know him as the man who fed the ducks fresh bread at the park and cuddled Cyril when the vets had to give him an injection. “How many fucking times do I have to ask you lot to fucking knock. I mean it’s a - ”

He stopped short when he saw you, eyes going wide and lips twitching upwards just a little. He slipped into business mode whenever he sat at the leather chair behind his desk, but you always managed to chip away at his foundation.

“What the bloody hell are you doing here?”

“Nice to see you too.” You laughed, walking around his desk to see him, his legs naturally opening to let you stand in between them, his eyes following every curve and line of your face, settling on the natural rosebud flush of your lips.

“You’re a sight for sore eyes.” He mused, ring clad fingers darting around your waist and pulling you in. He toyed with the buttons on your dress and the jewellery around your neck, his fingers rough and large and as hot as a fire. His day had been shitty so far, but seeing the sparkle in your eyes and the loose curl of your hair had made everything much, much better.

“Hmm.” You said, leaning into his touch, batting away his hand as it slipped somewhere a little too low. “Marcus gave me the afternoon of so I thought I would come and surprise you.”

He blinked up at you, all wistful and love drunk and making your knees turn into blackcurrant jelly. “Did you now?”

“Yep.” You smiled, brushing your nose against his before pulling back and teasingly shaking the paper bag of baked goods in your hand. “And I bought gifts.”

“Yeah. Yeah. In a minute.” He barely registered them, instead dragging you into him, pressing kisses to your lips and letting you wash away any thoughts from his brain, not stopping until he was totally, completely drowning in you.

——————————————————-

That was how you ended up cross legged on the sofa, devouring your new novel and sipping on the rose and oolong tea Alfie kept in the cupboard for when you visited the factory. You could hear the rain pattering down the windows around you, mixed with the scratch of Alfie’s fountain pen and the sound of him rifling through his papers. It was fun to watch him as well as listen to him, the way his eyebrows raised when he read something he didn’t like, the twitch of his nose and the way that he ran his fingers through the coarse hair of his beard, moulding it to a peak at the bottom of his chin.

He watched you as well. When you got so into your book that your brows furrowed and your nose wrinkled. The way your hair was loose and wild, your stockings a soft pink under the stormy sky, your eyes wide and frantic, desperate to read as much as you could. He smiled at the way your leg bounced, how you tried to pick the stems from your strawberries with one hand but then accidentally squished them, the juice running down your wrist. He especially liked the way you were using his winter coat as a blanket, drowning in the fabric like a child, the collar snug around your chin.

Everything was perfect.

Until it wasn’t.

You heard Ollie before you saw him, the crash of his laced black boots thundering up the stairs, the way that he collided with the door rather than opening it first. You and Alfie stood up at the same time, his eyes immediately darting to you, gesturing for you to get behind him.

“Eric’s here.” Was all the boy said, and you watched the colour drain from Alfie’s face.

“Eric?” You said, “Eric Martin?”

Your question lingered in the air as the two men walked around one another, gesturing wildly and talking under their breath; Alfie completely frantic and flustered. You had only heard of Alfie’s new business partner in passing, the two of them had spent the better part of a year talking through agreements and shipments and trying to manoeuvre a deal where the two of them could co exist happily - Alfie’s rum and Eric’s stolen goods sharing a boat so that the city checks would be easier. Alfie had never been particularly quite when it came to business. He liked to include you and get your opinion on things, he trusted you most of all anyway, but he had been secretive when it came to Eric.

You had heard through Ollie and rumours at the club and whispers in the factory that this “Eric” was a man not to be trifled with. Apparently he was unpredictable and violent, and he belonged to one of the major crime gangs in Cambridge. None of this scared you though, many people thought the exact same of the man you shared your bed with, and you knew a side of him that nobody else saw. The gossip was barbed and cruel though. They said he was conniving and underhanded, and that his last two wives had been admitted to hospital with broken and fractured bones.

So Alfie tried cutting him out as much as he could, never wanting to say his name or talk about him in the safety of his home, not with you around. Your home was his solace, and he wouldn’t taint his life with you in blood red - you were too important. You never thought much of it, but watching his reaction, his sudden overprotectiveness and stern frown and rattled demeanour, made you just a little bit frightened.

“What the fuck does he want?” Alfie snapped, pulling your coat over your shoulders frantically and starting to button it up, then helping you tug on your boots and lace them.

“He’s pissed about the Brighton shipment, he says his liquor didn’t get there on time.”

“Stupid fucking...” Alfie’s voice trailed off like smoke, something downstairs on the factory floor clattering loudly followed by distinct, angry shouts. “We told him it was too risky with the police there, he should have fucking listened. We were due a meeting next week, tell him to fuck off and come back then.”

“He won’t listen.”

“Make him.”

“I...” He started, but Alfie cut him off again, standing next to you and taking your face in his large, calloused hands.

“Right, pet. Stay here for a little bit, and when it clears up, Ollie will take you out the back, alright?”

“Alfie...” You started to protest, before exhaling and sighing as he turned to his protégée.

“You got that, Ol? Nothing is to happen to her.”

You were getting a little hot with being ordered around, but the visible anxiety swimming across their faces like the midnight sea was enough for you to close your mouth. Instead of agreeing with his boss, Ollie shook his head, sucking on his lower lip as he tried to think of a way to convey the sincerity of the situation.

“He’s really angry, Alfie. You need to go down, now. Before he decides to come up.”

“Yeah, alright.”

Your fingers clenched, and you darted out to tug on the edge of his sleeve before he left.“Alfie. Please be careful.”

There was a smog of anxiety in your stomach and warning signs ringing like alarms in your mind as he pressed a tender kiss to the top of your head, his lips brushing your hairline. You chewed on the edge of your lip as he left, and you wondered how your blissful afternoon had turned into this: your body shaking with nerves as your husband descended down the stairs and into the belly of the beast.

Ollie reached out and touched your shoulder, trying to help you feel calm but his face was the colour of tepid dishwater, paling by the second.

“He’ll be fine.”

You crossed all of your fingers and toes.

———————————————————————

About twenty minutes passed, and the shouting had gone from ear piercingly loud to a low hum, which you found oddly comforting despite everything. You watched as Ollie fiddled with his pocket watch, the two of you waiting until it was safe to head downstairs.After a moment you heard the sound of the giant metal door opening, the one right at the front where the workers came in and the bakery goods were delivered, a clear indication from Alfie that Eric was leaving.

Ollie leapt up and smiled faintly at you, edging you towards the door as you swung your handbag across your chest. You scoffed a little as you walked, turning to face him.

“If Eric is gone, why can’t I stay?”

Ollie merely rolled his eyes, his hand migrating to your lower back as he all but pushed you forward. You might have been able to get away with ignoring Alfie’s orders, but he certainly wouldn’t. “You know Alfie won’t want you here after that. There’s no use fighting him about it, he’ll want you back at home.”

You sighed but conceded, allowing yourself to be guided down the staircase. At least at home you could distract yourself and have Cyril with you, his big treacle eyes were the perfect remedy to a bad day.

You were right beside the back door and ready to leave when you heard a voice cracking like thunder from behind you, something as sharp as a knife and as loud as a church bell. You both froze instantly, every nerve in your body feathering, your heart aching to know that Alfie was alright.

“You little fucking liar.” Cut around the room like barbed wire. “How long were you planning on hiding this shipment from me?” There was another crash, and you could hear liquid trickling and dribbling into a puddle, followed by the sweet, sour smell of alcohol.

“You don’t know what the fuck you’re on about mate.” It was Alfie speaking now, his voice lowered to a dangerous octave, and you could picture the lightning like anger on his face. “Calm down.”

“Calm down? Calm down? You’ve been sending things off without my knowledge!”

“I said. Fucking calm down.” The sound of a hand slamming down on wood, as fierce as a slap on the face. “You don’t want to make an enemy of me.”

There was another scuffle: rapid footsteps on the floor, the crack of knuckles and the smell of ash. A couple of the boys darted in from the other room, their shirts untucked and hands turning red. You watched them curiously, stepping forward on unsteady heels to try and pinpoint the commotion. You felt Ollie's hand reach for you but you leapt out of his grasp, at the same time a body flew from the next room and landed in a heap next to barrels of aged rum and whisky, the wood heaving from the strain.

You glanced at the man on the floor, his body oddly contorted, his bald head glistening with sweat and his body reeking of putrid alcohol and cigarettes. This was obviously Eric. Your eyes widened in disgust at the drunk, violent man taking swings at whoever he could, wanting nothing more than to get away from him. You saw Alfie emerge from the shadows, his gaze flitting straight to you, his hands swollen and his face flushed with visible anger at the man sprawled on the ground.

Before you could retreat, Eric’s wide, black eyes landed on you, practically bulging out of his head with adrenaline and anger and excitement. “ You know, Alfie.” He asked through bubbles of saliva, scrambling to his feet as best he could, lunging for you. You saw Alfie and a few of his best men move forward, hands ready like cocked guns to strike if they needed to. Eric ignored them, wanting to pack as many fatal blows in whilst he had the chance. “Everybody at the club talks about your little whore of a wife, Solomon’s.”

The room fell deadly silent. His words didn’t affect you at all, but you felt a pool of dread settle in your gut and you stepped backwards, warning him with your eyes. He was at the back of the room, but you could still feel the anger vibrating from your husband, and you heard him smack his lips as he tried to calm himself down.

Eric ignored your alarmed glare, spitting onto the concrete and looking you up and down with pure disgust and shameless lust. “You know that people only do business with you to get to her?”

“Don’t. You. Fuck - ” Alfie’s boots thundered like a stampede, his voice as dark and raspy as midnight, his words sharpened like butchers knives.

“Maybe I’ll have a go at her. Maybe it’ll teach you a little respect. If I have a go at that smug little whore and slap her around a little and....”

He didn’t finish his sentence, Alfie’s cane smashing against the side of Eric’s head with enough momentum to send his teeth flying, small milky white canines lying a few feet in front of you in a pool of sticky blood. He made some kind of noise from on the floor, his hands coming up to protect what was left of his face, his polished shoes desperately trying to grip onto something to help him up. There was a second hit. And then a third. Each accompanied by ear splitting cries, and the sound of flesh against stone.

“Don’t you ever, ever, speak about my wife like that again.” You could just about make out Alfie from the darkness, his silhouette mighty and terrifying, leaning over the shattered body on the floor, filled with a hatred that seemed to overpower him.

“I - ” Eric tried to speak but only blood pooled from his mouth, his body weakened and damaged from the attack. He tried to cover himself with his hands but failed, another ear piercing crack echoing around the room.

You lunged forward, wanting to stop your husband before he went too far. “Alfie! Stop! You’re going to kill him!”

He blinked up at you, his pupils swallowed by black. His gaze lowered from you onto the wailing man on the ground, his words playing on a loop in his brain, digging their nails in every time the record restarted.

He had said those evil things about you.

He glanced at Ollie, finally opening his mouth to speak. “Take her home.”

You struggled in Ollie’s grip, desperate to see your husband and knock some sense into him. Your heart hung heavy in your chest, equal parts terrified that he would either end up hurt or in a more dangerous situation than the one he was already in. You fought hard but Ollie’s hold was tighter, his fingers squeezing you tightly. He tried to be kind but forceful as he pulled you out into the alley, your heard turned back to face your husband, watching as him and the shadow on the floor faded to a dull, awful, obsidian.

—————————————-

You were certain you were going to make holes in the wood. You had been pacing back and forth the living room floor for almost an hour, and Cyril had abandoned his mission of trying to cheer you up, and instead watched you protectively and cautiously from his wicker basket beside the sofa.

You had chewed your sunshine yellow nails down to the wick, and your heart hadn’t stop thumping since you had left the warehouse. Ollie had left you to your thoughts, keeping watch outside to make sure nothing harmed you, and also that you didn’t harm somebody else.

Dealing with hysterical women wasn’t really his forte.

There had been no word from Alfie since you had left, and so you watched the teal wall phone endlessly, hoping that it would ring and you would know he was alright. You were greeted with nothing but ice cold silence, and so you resumed your pacing, biting down on the skin of your thumb until you could taste blood.

Right before you were about to lose all control and demand Ollie take you to see him, you heard the crunch of the gravel outside, and saw lemon headlights flash against the wall. Cyril’s head lifted quickly, and his tail began to thump, but your feet turned to concerted and you were unable to do anything other than wait.

You were as still as a spectre as you stood facing the door, your body prickling with anxiety and adrenaline. A car - you assumed Ollie’s - coughed and spluttered over the rocks and into the road, leaving you alone with Alfie. You heard the key in the lock, practically felt the metal ridges running over your spine as he pulled and twisted and finally came inside, the sky a gloomy, smoky grey, rain falling so harshly it was almost hail.

He was shaped so strongly, his figure so barbed and brawny and beautiful. You felt totally mortal beside a man like him, and he looked even more so like a God when you saw him under the icy white lamp light in the hall.

He was covered in blood. Soaked in it, really. It was matted in his hair and in ugly brown splotches across his once pristine shirt and under his fingernails and smeared across his boots in a shade of red you had never seen before. It was obvious he had tried to clean himself up judging from the uneven patches and water marks, but he had given up, deciding to risk everything and drive through the streets like an abattoir worker, just so he could see you as quickly as he could.

You let out some kind of noise and stepped forward, he caught you effortlessly, the way that he always would.

“Alfie.” You said, wide eyed and innocent and good, and he felt like a sinner holding something so angelic in his arms.

“I’m alright. I’m alright.”

There was blood in his beard, and a plum sided bruise turning nightshade on his upper arm. “Oh God, Alf.”

He shook his head, pulling you in and smelling the orange and cinnamon of your shampoo and the vanilla perfume on your neck and felt the softness of your hair and the curves of your body. The day had been bad. It had started so wonderfully and ended up shattered and splintered into something so awful and malevolent, and now there was nothing he wanted except you, his home.

“We need to - ” You started, but he frowned, his arms engulfing you and tugging you in. He pressed his lips to whatever flesh he could find, open mouthed and desperate, sucking and biting and aching for you.

“No. No.” He whispered into your neck, his voice so small and desperate that your heart throbbed. “I need you, my love.”

You knew what he wanted. How we got when he was like this. Touch starved. Greedy. Insatiable. How he wanted nothing else but the feel of you under him, the weight of your ribs and the feel of your body and love consuming him until nothing was left. Fuck his back and his cane, he needed to claim you and mark you and show you just how badly he needed you. He needed to find religion at the alter of your pliant, yearning body. Show you how much he loved you on the cold kitchen tiles with the rain casting grey shadows and his lips biting your own as the thunder clapped above.

————————-

The tap was still leaking.

Alfie had promised to fix it weeks ago and yet it still dribbled lukewarm water continuously, you didn’t mind for once though, the soft noise it made as it bounced into the water was somewhat calming.

His legs around you were as thick as tree trunks and covered in curly, coarse hair. His arms were tight around you, and you played with the jewels on his fingers as you both relaxed, letting the hot steam cover you both. You were cradled in front of him despite your instance that his back would hurt and it would cause more harm than good. He simply got in the water and dragged you on top of him, letting the pink bath salts do their job.

You hadn’t really spoken since you’d made love like teenagers on the kitchen floor. Afterwards, he tugged you on top of him and held you close, the two of you skin to skin, letting your pulses synch and breathing calm all whilst he stayed warm and throbbing inside of you. Needing to be joined with you for as long as he could.

Then you ran a bath and filled it with all of the expensive lotions and potions you had stockpiled. Cherry and rose and sweet mint and chocolate and lime, things that might have clashed but would easily cover the smell of sweat and sex and thick, coppery blood. The two of you sat in the water, not speaking but filled with love, despite all of the unspoken tension in the air.

You felt him shift behind you. His huge body sent water and bubbles lapping wildly over the tub edge, coating the floor in marshmallow pink. You giggled softly, and the sweet, angelic noise gave Alfie the final push to tell you everything.

“I know what you want to ask me.”

“Hmm?” You murmured, letting round, iridescent bubbles fall through the cracks in your fingers, knowing exactly what he was about to say but feigning innocence anyway.

“You want to know if I killed him.”

You didn’t say anything, but you didn’t need to, he continued anyway.

“I did.”

The bathroom fell silent again and Alfie could feel you stiffen under him. You knew from the moment he swung his cane across Eric’s head that he would be buried six feet by the end of the day, but it still hit you like a punch to the windpipe to hear the words aloud.

“Does that bother you?” He asked after a moment, the words thick and raspy, as though they had been stuck in his throat like congealed honey.

“I’m not sure.” You said finally.

It was the truth. You weren’t sure.

You knew he had killed people before. You knew what the war had made him do, what it had turned him into. You weren’t stupid, either. You knew that he often came home with dirt under his nails and blood splattered on his boots and that glazed look in his eyes that made your stomach tie itself in knots. You knew because you had been there through it all, cleaning him up and disinfecting his wounds, talking him down when the memories of gunshots and trenches got too loud, listening to him tell you all of the secrets that lingered in his mind like flies around a carcass.

But if you were being honest, you didn’t care that he had killed. You never judged Alfie or his choices, you understood the way his brain worked and how he made his decisions. Most of the men had been awful. Abusers and violent thieves and con men with dirty intentions. This was the business you had signed up for when you fell for the six foot man with questionable morals but a heart of solid gold. There was no way you were turning your back on him now.

It wasn’t murder that scared you, it was the possible repercussions that led you to sleepless nights and bloody, bitten lips. You were terrified that one day everything would catch up to him, and it would be your husband that ended up in a coffin. He was so powerful and dangerous and magnificent, but he wasn’t invincible.

You were about to say as much but he continued, the water sloshing around the two of you. “Don’t let it bother you. I’d do it again. Kill a fucking million men if I had to. If anyone talks about you like that - if they even think it. They’re gone. Bloody scum. The lot of ‘em.”

You sighed, shifting up and grabbing his hand under the water. You rubbed circles across his palm, conveying your love through actions. “I don’t want to be the reason you have blood on your hands.”

“I’m a big lad right, I can make my own decisions.”

“I know you are Alf, but you know how I worry.”

“Listen to me, right.” He muttered, the candles flickering clementine, his fingertips pressing gently onto the bare flesh of your hip. He cleared his throat, feeling the rise and fall of your chest against his belly. “After the war I had nothing - and then I met you and fuck me you changed everything.”

He paused, reminiscing internally about how you met and your early dates, thinking of toffee kisses and giddy, pure love and fucking in back alleys and winter walks and finally feeling something after the war had shot everything right out of him. “And you are my wife. I’ll never let anything happen to you.”

You tugged on his big toe, making him wince and playfully hit you, the air lightened just a little bit, but enough so that the two of you could breathe. “I don’t care that you killed them, Alf. I never have. But God, if something were to happen to you! What if the police start looking? What if...”

A million fucked up scenarios of your beloved in silver cuffs and a bullet in his head made you feel completely nauseous, but he held you tight, grounding you back to reality.

“I’m not going anywhere. And for the cops - they should be thanking me. Got rid of a lot of nasty criminals without them getting their hands dirty.” He pressed kisses to the back of your neck, the tip of your spine, the crook of your ear. “I promise you, my love, everything will be alright.”

The future was uncertain, but you knew that when you married him. Some days were just bad.

Clouded in darkness and tinged with blood and rust. Your relationship had always been a little unconventional, a little rough around the edges and at times, like a small wooden boat on a rough sea. But despite everything your love had been unwavering, as solid as a steel, the kind of dreamy infatuation that people longed for. For every bad day and every fight and every knot that wound itself in your belly - there was also so much good. Sleepy kisses and pillow talk and sharing the parts of yourself that no one else saw. A language without words, the safety of his arms, the home in your hips, domestic mornings and a love that could last through anything.And in that moment, with the storm starting to ease and the sky starting to lighten and his arms around you and Cyril starting to whine for his dinner downstairs...

It was enough.

Because you weren’t just the girl he would kill for. You were the girl he would live for.

#alfie solomons imagine #alfie solomons headcanon #alfie solomons oneshot #peaky blinders oneshot #peaky blinders imagine #alfie solomons x reader #writing #alfie solomons hc

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farfromsugafanfic · 4 years

Text

Innocence

Genre: Mafia AU, Angst, Fluff

Pairing: Namjoon/Reader

Warnings: violence, guns/gun violence, cursing, violence against women, home invasion

Synopsis: When you end up getting caught in the crossfire, you’re brought to the local mafia leader who promises to rehabilitate you. Although, falling in love you certainly wasn’t part of the plan.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"Shit, she's bleeding out," someone said from a few feet away.

"What? Who?"

"I don't know some random lady."

You moaned in pain as a pair of boots approached you and eventually, you could make out the fuzzy face of someone crouching over you. You couldn't tell where the pain was coming from, only that you felt it rippling through your body

"Fuck, Namjoon doesn't like when innocent people get hurt. We've gotta take her back with us."

"What? Isn't that just part of it? Innocent people get caught up in this shit all the time."

"Not the way Namjoon does it, come on, come grab her legs."

As one of the men looped his arms underneath your armpits, you felt one final jolt of pain that felt like it was ripping your body apart before everything went black.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"Is she going to live?" one of the men who'd brought you back asked.

"Yes, barely," Namjoon said, his face firm and his voice steadier than normal. "You're sure it wasn't one of your bullets?"

"All of our bullets were accounted for, sir."

Namjoon nodded. "If I find out either of you are lying, you know the consequences?"

Both men nodded in understanding.

The doctor emerged from the room where you were. "She's waking up, sir. I'll leave the rest to you. Call me if she starts showing any concerning signs."

Namjoon nodded and waved the doctor off and entered your room.

If it weren't for the drab gray appearance of the room, it would've looked like you were in a normal hospital room. An IV in your arm and white sheets pulled up to your chin. Your eyes were still closed, but your heart monitor was beginning to slowly pick up from it's near flat line when you'd arrived.

He pulled a stool from the corner of the room and sat next to your watching as your chest moved slowly up and down. The doctor had extracted the bullet and cleaned the blood from your skin and clothes. Your bloody jeans and sweatshirt had been washed and were folded on a table in the corner of the room. Your hair was still dirty, but the blood washed from its tips.

You looked younger than when he'd first seen you and it only made his chest ache. He had no idea who you were or what you had been doing in that part of town, but you certainly didn't deserve the bullet in your shoulder. It had nearly missed your collarbone and the important blood vessels, but you'd still lost enough blood to be anemic.

Your eyelids began to flutter and Namjoon sat still as he met them.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

You opened your eyes and were immediately met with a pair of unfamiliar brown ones.

"Hello," the man said. He sat with his elbows on his thighs and his hands clasped together.

Other than the fact that you had no idea who the man was, the more concerning thing was that you had no idea where you were and you were seemingly alone with him. If you had to take a guess, the room almost seemed like a storage room of some sort; a cement floor and shelves lining all but two of the walls. They were mostly empty except for vague medical supplies.

"Where am I?" you asked, the beep of your heart monitor beginning to quicken.

"You're safe." The man sat up straighter, but his eyes never left you. "I'm Kim Namjoon. What's your name?"

You eyed him suspiciously. "Y/N."

"Just Y/N," he asked, his eyebrow arching.

"For now."

He chuckled before getting up and heading for a sink in the corner of the room. He filled a glass and walked back over to you with a pill in his hand.

"Take this," he said, placing the pill in your palm and holding the glass above you for when you were ready. You stared at him for a moment before glancing down at the pill. It looked normal and based upon the fact that this man was most likely the one responsible for saving your life, he would have no reason to kill you now, right? "It's an iron supplement. Cause you lost so much blood. You'll have to take them every day for a couple months."

You nodded and placed the pill in your mouth and swallowed it down. There was a feeling in the pit of your stomach that you could trust Namjoon, at least that he wouldn't kill you.

"Now, I need you to tell me everything you remember from the night you were shot."

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

You were on your way home after work. You'd just graduated and started in an entry-level position at your dream company, but it left you exhausted and overworked. It was already nearly 11 and you knew you should've allowed your co-worker to drive you home, but you didn't know him well enough yet to trust him with where you lived.

You normally felt fairly safe walking through the city by yourself. You'd grown up there and you knew the areas to avoid, but you were tired and decided to take a short cut through a rougher neighborhood.

You took out your headphones and increased your pace so that you were walking faster than your normal pace, but wouldn't look too scared or suspicious.

For the first ten minutes, everything was normal, but as you neared the end of the neighborhood and the beginning of yours, you heard yelling. You looked around and couldn't find a source, so you kept walking and as you crossed an alleyway, a man ran into you, knocking off your feet.

You sat up, your vision a little blurry and your head still coming off its daze. As your vision came back, you stood up and braced yourself against the wall. That's when you looked up and the shot came. You couldn't see who shot you, if they meant to, or if it was just an accident. Heck, you couldn't even tell which direction the bullet came from.

You fell to your knees and eventually on your back. At first, the pain was unbearable, you felt the blood pouring out of your shoulder, although couldn't tell if it was from the back or front. But, eventually, the pain ceased and your eyelids began to feel heavy. It was soon after the man lifted you that a final burst of pain caused everything to go black.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"You don't know who shot you?" he asked. The darkness in his eyes as he asked the question caused the pain in your shoulder to flare.

You shook your head. "It happened too fast."

He nodded, before getting up and leaving the room without another word. You then only saw strangers as they came to give you meals or check your wound which still had a long way to heal.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"Morning," Namjoon said, in the exact same cadence he said it every morning. He laid a tray over your lap which had a spinach and cheese omelet, toast, and a rotating menu of meats. Today was two slices of bacon. And, of course, on the side was a pair of iron supplements.

"Think you can eat it all today?" he asked. While you needed the nutrients, you had basically no appetite most of the time, but today, the toast was spread with a red jam it usually wasn't, which made you bite into it immediately. Raspberries. Your favorite. "Why don't you tell me about your job today?"

He pulled a chair to your bed and flipped it around and sat on it backward, allowing his arms to dangle off the top. The two of you had promised to tell each other something about each other each day. You knew it was a way to get information out of you and monitor your well being, but you didn't really mind. It started to become one of your favorite parts of the day.

"I'll tell you about mine if you tell me about yours."

He stiffened at that. You had your suspicions that Namjoon's job was less than legal considering how you ended up meeting him. You just weren't sure exactly what it was he did. Was he some sort of drug lord? A gang member? A pimp? Your stomach turned at the possibilities.

"Okay," he said. "You just have to promise that you won't be scared of me."

"O-okay."

He nodded, although you knew he caught the shaking in your voice. "You first."

"I—uh—I work for a non-profit that benefits women who have been victims of violence," you said. "I help process all the donations and make sure all the finances match up. I was an accounting major in college, but I didn't really feel like doing other people's taxes for the rest of my life. I want to feel like I'm making some sort of difference. Even though I don't make as much money, I feel like it's worth it."

"You are," he said. "You are making a difference."

Silence filled the room for a few moments, but it wasn't awkward or tense, it was simply you and Namjoon in your own thoughts. His eyes locked on you and your eyes unconsciously noticed the dimples on his cheeks that appeared and disappeared as he talked.

"All right, you promised," you said. "Your turn."

Namjoon's posture straightened and he cleared his throat. "Oh, well, I'm sort of the leader of the local mafia. I mean, it's not quite as nefarious as it seems. It's mostly just money laundering and stuff like that."

"But, you still kill people?"

"I never have. My men do only when necessary."

You gulped and pulled your eyes away from him. "Then, why did you save me?"

"Because I don't like innocent people getting hurt."

"How did this happen? How did you become the leader? You--you just don't seem like the type."

"My family," he said. "They kind of started this whole thing. I went to college and everything, but ultimately, I didn't know how to be anything else."

"You know you could always leave it behind. You're the leader. You could end all of this."

"It's not that easy. If I end it, I immediately become a target or someone would start it back up. And, let's just say, you don't want this kind of operation falling into the wrong hands. Many wouldn't have batted an eye at you getting shot."

"Don't think you're the hero here. Whether or not it was your men who shot me, whether or not you chose to save me, I still got shot because of you."

Namjoon's jaw stiffened and he crossed his arms over his chest. "You're right, I'm sorry," he said. "Although, it's not quite as easy to just leave."

"What did you study in college?"

"Huh?" He paused. "Literature and Writing."

You smiled. "Why don't you read to me?" you asked. "I never really got to take any literature classes in college and I missed them. I still have longer to recover. You could read to me whenever you wanted to."

"I'd like that," Namjoon said, his dimples appearing and lighting up his face.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

You laid back with your head and neck pressing back against the pillow as you closed your eyes as Namjoon's voiced lulled you asleep. You knew it wasn't just his voice and the way his voice took on a smooth rhythm as he read or the way his voice grew hoarse eventually. The doctor had slowly been weaning you off of the painkillers, while the pain wasn't as intense as before, it still exhausted you.

He was reading from Jane Eyre a book you certainly hadn't expected Namjoon to choose. The gothic element was enough to send shivers down your spine, but not keep you from falling asleep.

You were halfway through the book now and you knew you would never finish. Your condition was improving and you barely needed pain medication anymore. The doctor came once a day and today he had told you that he thought you'd be able to go back to your own apartment and life the next day.

Namjoon stopped reading and it jolted you out of your half-slumber.

"Why'd you stop?"

"I thought you were asleep."

You opened your eyes and shook your head, although your eyelids were only half open crescent moons and the way you were forcing them open made Namjoon chuckle.

"You're tired, anyway," he said. He closed the book and stood up from his chair. "Goodnight. Sleep well."

You watched as Namjoon walked towards the door and felt something in your chest. "Wait," you said. "This is the last night and we haven't finished the story."

"Y/N, we still have half the book left. There's no way--"

"Just stay with me tonight," you said. "I'll have to go back to being in my apartment all alone tomorrow and I don't know. I've enjoyed having you around."

"Y/N--" Namjoon said. "You're just--this isn't right--"

Namjoon's eyes met yours for a second before he ripped them away and walked out of the room with the book still in hand.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"She--she asked me to stay with her," Namjoon said. He sat in his desk chair with his feet resting up on the desk, something he only did when he was thinking deeply.

"Is that a bad thing?" his right-hand man, Yoongi asked. "You like her, right?"

"Yes, but Yoongi, she hasn't been out of that room for weeks. She's only seen me and the doctor with only a couple of exceptions. It's just Stockholm Syndrome."

"We didn't kidnap her though. She could've left if she wanted."

"Yes, Yoongi, but why would she? She would've had to pay for medical care elsewhere. Even if we didn't mean to, we trapped her here. She's hardly seen anyone but me. Of course, she'll become attached."

"It's not like you were torturing her, Joon. You were helping her and I see the way you look at her too. Everyone does."

"If I wanted to, I can't give her the life she deserves. She's doing good things, Yoongi. She's innocent and I want her to stay that way." Yoongi nodded in his head in understanding, but there lingered a small glint of hesitation in his eyes. "And, even if I could, keeping her around her is dangerous. If our rivals found out about her, she'd become a target."

Namjoon sighed and stood up from his desk and shuffled through his papers. "Make sure she gets home safely tomorrow. Keep a couple of men in the area for the next week or so just in case it was a targeted attack."

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"He's not coming?" you asked the man who introduced himself as Yoongi.

He shook his head and gave you a sympathetic look. "But, he did want me to give you this."

Yoongi reached into his bag and pulled out the copy of Jane Eyre Namjoon had read to you. It was an old copy--at least fifty years old--and he had a bookmark stuck halfway through. You opened to the marked page and found his handwriting on the bookmark. He wrote in black ink. It was neat, although smudged around the edges because he'd closed the book on it when the ink was still wet.

It's your turn to read now Namjoon x

Your eyes focused down on the 'x'. It certainly didn't mean anything, it was just his way of signing off, but it left you satisfied as you walked out of the door escorted by Yoongi and a few other men.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

3 months later

"Y/N!" one of your coworkers said, rushing into your office. "You're never going to believe this."

"What?" you asked looking up from your work.

"Some guy just came in here. He was so handsome and wearing a fancy suit and he wrote us a thirty thousand dollar check." She held up the check so you could see it.

"No way," you said, grabbing the check from her hands. You held it up to the light and placed it under the black light you had to verify authentic donations. You had a weird feeling in your gut and you glanced down at the signature on the check. You couldn't make out a particular name, but a shiver ran down your spine. "What was his name?"

"Oh, well, I don't think he told us his real name. But, you know the rich types, always wanting to protect their identities."

"Y/C/N, what. was. his. name?"

"Mr. Rochester."

6 months later

"We're a bit short his month, Y/N," your boss said. "You know I hate to deduct from wages. It wasn't much this month."

You nodded. It was the reality of working for a non-profit. Sometimes you got paid and sometimes you didn't, but you knew the money was going to people more deserving of yourself. You waited until you were on your way home to open the envelope and see just how much you were getting that month. When your eyes met the total, you slowly looked down before continuing onto your apartment.

You pushed the key into the lock wondering just how you were going to scrounge up enough money for next month's rent. You could always sell something or do some odd jobs on the weekends. You opened your door and stepped inside feeling your foot slip forward, causing you to nearly trip, your only savior is your right hand was still holding on to the doorknob.

You got your footing and bent down to find a small envelope that was slid under your door. Your name was printed neatly on it. Normally, this would freak you out, but you noticed the same black ink from the bookmark in the copy of Jane Eyre.

I know money has been tight. Here's rent for the next couple months. Keep doing what's important x Mr. Rochester

Tears came to your eyes and your bit your index finger as you read the note over and over again. He was absolutely insufferable and part of you wanted to rip up the check, but instead, you slipped it out of the envelope and into your purse.

9 months later

It was a quiet Saturday night when you heard the knock at your door. It was nearly 11 pm and you weren't expecting anyone. You were already in your pajamas and you had picked up Jane Eyre for the first time in a few months. It wasn't that you found it particularly hard to read, but every time you picked it up, you were reminded of him. The man you had no idea why you still thought about. The man who occasionally came into your life and then left just as quickly.

The knock came again and louder this time. This time panic rushed down your spine and you froze. Was it best to approach the door and give away the fact you weren't asleep? Or was it best to just act like you'd already done to bed and hope they go away?

You stayed put, but clutched your cellphone close to you. Another knock never came, but instead the rustling of the doorknob and the clicking of the lock. It was when you heard it successfully unlock that you ran towards the kitchen. You grabbed your largest kitchen knife and crouched in the corner.

You were in the middle of dialing emergency services when you were yanked up by your hair and your cellphone went clattering to the floor.

"Ah, yes, you are her," the man said.

You didn't recognize the man in front of you. He was taller than you and held your hair in a tightening grip that caused you to whimper.

"You're plainer than I expected. He's head over heels for you, so I figured you must be beautiful. But, I guess, you must have better things to offer." He smirked, but unlike the smirks Namjoon sometimes let slip, this one terrified you.

"Who are you?" you asked.

"It doesn't matter to you baby girl," he said. "All you need to know is that you're going to die."

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"Namjoon!" Yoongi said, running into the room, breathless. His face was red and his eyes were creased, almost in fear. It was uncommon for Yoongi to get so worked up, let alone run. He spoke when he finally caught his breath, "Min-sung," he said. "Min-sung was seen near her apartment."

Min-sung had once been a trusted man, but he began getting greedy. Wanting to take all the jobs. Skimming money off the top. He felt betrayed when Namjoon finally let him go. You'd think he'd be grateful, most other bosses would've had him killed for how much money he stole, but no. Min-sung's mind was only focused on the drugs he took and the money he needed to buy them.

Namjoon's eyes widened. He pulled open his desk drawer, nearly pulling the entire drawer out of it's setting. He pulled out a handgun and fed in the clip. It had not once been fired. Namjoon had never had the urge nor the need to kill, until that very moment.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"I'm going to play with you," he said. "To let him know you suffered. His precious little secret on the south side of the city."

"Please, I don't know who you're talking about. The walls are thin. I'm sure the neighbors are worried by now." Both were lies, but you hoped it came off convincing enough. He'd let go of your hair, but now he straddled you.

"Tell me, how do you want to die?"

"I don't want to die."

He laughed. "Of course not, sweetheart. But, you're going to. I'm being generous and giving you a choice. I could take that knife you had when I came in and stab you or I could kill you with my hands on your throat. Or, I could hold your head down in the bathtub and watch as you writhe around--"

Tears pushed out of your eyes and you felt blood sprout from your bottom lip as you dug into it. You squirmed underneath the man trying to wriggle yourself free or one of your limbs free.

"You know, I haven't really given much thought to dying," you said. You slowly slipped your foot upwards until you had enough leverage to bring your knee into his crotch.

He doubled over in enough pain for you to free yourself. You ran back towards the kitchen to grab the knife from earlier. You wrapped your palm around the hilt, but he was behind you before you could turn around. With all your might, you forced the knife backward, but it was at an awkward angle. Yet, you still heard him wince.

The knife dropped from your hand and the man turned you around, forcing your back against the counter. You noticed a long cut on his arm and felt a small sense of pride. At least if he was going to kill you, he would have a scar.

His hands wrapped around your neck and his thumbs sat right on top of your windpipe. You made eye contact with him as he pushed down and you made a small croaking sound as your eyes grew wider and your toes pointed in reaction to the lack of air.

"Stop...please...help...Namjoon..."

You managed only a few words before you ran out of air to manage any sounds. Your vision was beginning to blur and you knew in a few seconds you'd black out and it'd be the end.

The last few moments were so loud you couldn't make out what happened. Yelling, shuffling, a slam of a door, a loud pop. Then, it was all over.

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

"Y/N, Y/N, please come back to me."

You opened your eyes to see Namjoon crouched over you. Blood stained his shirt and even parts of his skin, but his hand was clean as it caressed your cheek softly.

"Thank God," he said. "I thought I was too late. The doctor is on his way and so are my men to clean up everything. We'll pay off the neighbors to keep things quiet if we have to. You don't need to worry."

"I'm not worried, Namjoon." Your voice was hoarse and still not all the way there. You felt the bruises forming on your neck and your entire body ached. You turned you head to see your attacker laying in a pool of blood a few feet away.

"Hey, hey, don't look at that. Come on."

"I'm not a child."

"That doesn't mean you need to see a dead guy on your kitchen floor."

He lifted you up and carried you into your bedroom. After setting you down, he went back out to the living area and grabbed the copy of Jane Eyre.

"You didn't get very far."

"I've been busy."

﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤

1 year later

Namjoon is almost done setting up everything in his new office when he hears a soft knock at the door. A delivery person carrying a large bouquet of flowers strides in and sets the vase on his desk and left without a word.

Curious, Namjoon walked from the corner of the room where he had been shelving books and to the center of the room. He plucked the card from among the flower heads.

I finally found time to finish the book. Congrats on the new job. Let's meet soon. Love, Jane

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iamnightduchess · 4 years

Note

May I ask for your nsfw reikasa headcanons 😳 for the As you Are universe and the It’s Gotta Be you universe? 😁

Did someone ask for some N.S.F.W headcanons? *__*

ReiKasa Fic AU/Modern AUHeadcanons (R18+) #1

Hello Nonnie!

Your Ask is the most pleasant surprise this last weekend but old is gold! <3 I have no excuse for the delay other than I was cramming up all my brain power to finish Part 1 of Until Dawn. (Do check it out when you have the time!) Thank you so much for the honor! I got you fam, so please find below some seriously steamy headcanons (Content Warning: Mature Readers only!) omg i am blushing hard while I’m writing this haha

Let’s go for ReiKasa in Canonverse then the modern AU ;)

As You Are

** Contains reimagining of scenes yet to be written/published in As You Are. So some fic spoilers ahead!

In Ch.12, it was heavily implied that after consummating their marriage, Reiner & Mikasa actually got to another round of ‘lovemaking’ in the shower. When their first time had been gentle, slow and tender, the shower sex was quite the opposite. It was harder and urgent.

At this point, Reiner discovered four new things about his new wife: i) Mikasa actually loves it when he pressed her hard against the wall and took her from behind, ii) Mikasa’s weakness is her breasts *points to point i*, iii) Mikasa has a muscle kink. She came on his third deep thrust in the shower, biting hard on his forearm as she did, and iv) Mikasa’s favorite position would be standing up because of *points to point iii* She loves seeing the way his muscles protruded when they flexed to support her weight. That explains the impromptu war room sexing afterwards.

Meanwhile Mikasa discovered three new things about her new husband: i) Reiner has not even a single scar on his body due to his shifter powers when she has numerous marks on hers from long-term ODM usage & that one time when she got her ribs broken by a Titan, ii) Reiner loves the tattoo on her back and the scars on her body, and iii) Reiner’s weak spot is his nape. The moment she bites his nape, he just gets hard.

Both Mikasa & Reiner are biters. But Reiner is the ‘territorial’ one. By the next morning, Mikasa’s skin looked like she had a really severe rash on her neck and her chest. No wonder Gabi was worried. Mikasa had to wear high collared blouses for one week, even inside their shared home.

Mikasa is the first one to initiate oral sex. She is after all, a seasoned blade wielder ;D

In future chapters, the first time Reiner went down on his wife was because of yeap, jealousy & yes, his ‘territorial instinct’. Lets just say it will have something to do with Porco ‘Pussy-eater’ Galliard ;) Galliard will be making a move on his dear wife at a function and Reiner is not happy about it.

Reiner loves seeing Mikasa in a formal kimono and getting her out of it - layer by layer.

Reiner & Mikasa have a very balanced power play in the bedroom. When he’s the dominant one, she’ll be the one yielding and vice versa. This couple is bound to have angry/jealous sex somewhere down the road and things can get very ugly when it happens. But, that only happens when the balance is thrown off the scale.

Reiner actually has amazing hands made for awesome massages. In a future chapter, we’d learn that things get hot and heavy inside their private onsen at the Azumabito Residence and it all begins with a simple back rub. *winks*

-----

It’s Gotta Be You

10 Date Rule (thank you @shingeki-no-scenarios for some of this amazing ideas!)

Right before their first official date, Reiner suggested the 10 Date Rule to Mikasa, which she agreed to, as he wants to prove to her that he’s not like the other men she’s dated before, who expected sex on the first date. There was only one rule: the only physical display of affections allowed are only a chaste kiss & hand-holding. Just that.

The first 3 dates had been outside so it was very sweet and very innocent. Reiner would always end their date at her front door with a simple kiss on her forehead or her cheeks. They had a night in on the 5th date and that was when things got interesting.

5th Date - Reiner made dinner at her house and they spend the rest of the evening just cuddling on the sofa, watching a rom-com movie together. Just having his arms around her was actually enough to turn her on but Reiner was very persistent in keeping their date chaste. Mikasa just had to leave a pair of sexy lace teddy lingerie hanging at the back of her bathroom door. Reiner can’t stop himself from imagining her in that.

6th & 7th Date - Reiner had to borrow one of Bertolt’s old hoodies from college with some questionable stains on it to help him be less attractive on their consecutive home dates. Mikasa just had to be a tease by spending the rest of the evening in a pair of tiny midriff shirt and a pair of lace boxers, devouring her Green Tea Häagen-Dazs and licking the spoon clean with a loud slurp or sipping on the straw for her smoothie too fucking slow. There had been a lot of tongue action coming from her that two nights. Reiner had to imagine a naked Zeke to kill whatever potential boner he could have had. It was torture.

8th Date - They had candlelight dinner and slow danced. The grinding wasn’t helping. Oh, and that off-shoulder red dress she was wearing on purpose, he was so close to ripping it off her that night.

9th Date - Zeke came over for a visit & ended up drunk-crashing at Mikasa’s place. Reiner had to stay over to help just in case & just the mere thought of Zeke just killed whatever romantic mood they were in. Felt like they were babysitting a grown-ass baby brother.

10th Date - Reiner had bought champagne to celebrate their tenth date at his place & he actually spruced up his bedroom with rose petals and those fancy scented candles to set up the mood for their long-awaited sexy time. However, Mikasa had to sit in an emergency surgery that night and ended up sleeping in the Medical Centre’s staff room in exhaustion and totally missed their scheduled 10th date. They made up with a lunch date the next day and they definitely went to town that night at his house. They never even made it to the bedroom ;)

People just assumed that they have a frequent & super active sex life. It’s quite the opposite as they enjoy more domestic activities together like baking and home improvements. But they still maintain a weekly date night even after being engaged to each other. Reiner’s a super cuddler so he’ll be the one who initiates the little intimate gestures in public. But behind closed doors, Mikasa would be the more handsy one, which Reiner really loves.

Reiner is built like a Greek God and Mikasa made sure to ‘accidentally’ walked into the bathroom whenever he’s in the shower ;) While Reiner always made sure he’ll be in the living room when Mikasa practices her yoga routine. Just so he can plan ahead on which position he can get her in the next time they’re in the mood ;D omg that sounds more pervy than I intended

Mikasa loves to wear one of Reiner’s shirts when they’re at home together because she knows it will drive him crazy with need.

Reiner occasionally wears reading glasses at home and Mikasa gets weak in the knees when he does. She almost always like to get down and dirty while he’s wearing the glasses :)

They spent their first Christmas together with the Jeagers and Zeke almost walked in on them having a quickie in their dad’s basement.

Reiner & Mikasa would be those couples that still have a burning fire in their relationship even as they grew older. That’s also how baby Ryder was conceived unexpectedly when the twins, Rémy & Miraé just turned 10. They thought they were done having babies 8D

-------

I had super fun time working on this headcanon, Nonnie! I hope you like it 💖 Keep ‘em coming if you’d like to read more & please don’t be discouraged from sending in Asks because sometimes it’ll take a long time for me to write because of my other writing projects/RL commitments but I would always follow through :3

Thank you & take care!

xoxo

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emmy-writes-sometimes · 4 years

Text

Running Up That Hill

You were kidnapped for two months before your dad, Andy, finds you.

You had been missing for approximately two months when you were found. It was like every other missing girl story; you’d just disappeared, the only traces of you your phone and your open car with the key in the ignition. Your family was heartbroken, especially your father. He often said that he loved you more than anything, and when the police stopped searching, declaring you a lost cause, he fell off the rails. He changed into a completely different man, citing your disappearance, and every day he went looking for you still.

He was conducting a raid when it happened. This guy was absolutely sick – he’d already been charged with kidnapping but gotten out three years ago on a loophole, he was a registered sex offender, and he’d been charged with possession of child pornography twice. He was a terrible man. Andy couldn’t lie – as he sat in the car, waiting, he thought about you. He knew there was a possibility that this guy could have been responsible for multiple kidnappings like yours, but never did he think you were just inside the house.

“This guy is fuckin’ sick,” his co-worker said, shining a flashlight into the house.

“Yeah,” Andy said absentmindedly. “I’ll go look for anything that might be violating parole. You just check over the house and make sure our guy’s not hiding before we send more units out to look. The last thing we want to do is spook him into running again.” His co-worker nodded, taking the three police officers that had broken down the door with her. Andy proceeded down to the man’s makeshift office, starting to look through papers for anything that might lead to a conviction. He must have been there for five or ten minutes before he got the call from his co-worker.

“Andy, we need you to come down to the basement.” Andy cringed, hanging up the phone. He prepared himself to see a body, maybe more than one. He walked to the kitchen and down the stairs to where the flashlights were focused on something specific. You. Alive. It was obvious that it was you; you were his spitting image, right down to the pleading blue eyes. You were tied up on a cot by the far wall, your knees forced up to your chest and your arms tied around them. There was a cloth laying beside you and one in your mouth, keeping you from talking. Your voice was too hoarse to do anything anyway. Andy saw you and his heart started beating faster than it ever had before. He ran forward, pulling the cloth off of your mouth, and he kneeled in front of you. Your wrists were raw from being held together, blood covering the cloths you were tied up with.

“Oh my God, Y/n, baby,” he said, touching the side of your face. You were so pale. You were so skinny, you always were, but your shirt that wasn’t yours hung off your chest. You barely reacted at first. Maybe you were dreaming. But when your dad started un-doing the ties that bound you, you started to realize. You were free. This was your dad that was here, and the cops, and people who couldn’t hurt you. Your dad brushed your greasy hair behind your ear and you could feel that he got the ties away from your wrists. You could move. You reached out toward his neck and even though you were too weak to hold on, he picked you up.

“Dad,” you tried to say. You couldn’t speak. You could feel him say something about an ambulance as he carried you up the stairs. The open front door was the first sunlight you’d seen in two months. It hurt a little, but the heat felt good. You were so cold. Your father’s massive hand pulled your hair back and off of your face as he held you. He was still then, until more sirens rang in the air. You tried to grab onto him and hold him, but he did all of the work for you. You couldn’t imagine how you looked – a sixteen year-old girl being carried by your father because you couldn’t walk yourself. Or could you – you didn’t know. You didn’t know what you could do. You only knew that you were too weak to be considered human.

“Hey, baby, they’re just gonna take you and check you over, alright? I’m gonna call Mom and Jake, let them know where we are, alright?” You nodded. “Okay. I won’t be far.” He wrestled his jacket from his arms and placed it around your shoulders, big enough to be a blanket on you, and he sat you down in the back of an open ambulance. He kept looking behind him even though he walked away, calling Laurie.

“Andy? What’s up?” She asked him. She could hear that something was wrong.

“I found her. In the raid. Y/n. She’s alive,” he said. “She’s alive.”

“Oh, my God, is she okay?”

“They’re checking her out right now. I don’t think I’ll be able to take her home right away, the police are gonna wanna talk to her before then. But she’s okay. I’m not leaving her.”

“Okay. Tell her I love her.”

“I will.” Andy hung up the phone and called Jacob, who answered right away, too. That was right – he had a free lunch period. “Jake. I need to tell you something, but you can’t tell anyone yet, I don’t want news getting out yet.”

“What?” Jacob asked.

“I found your sister. She’s alive. I don’t know how bad she is yet but she’s alive.” Jacob didn’t know how to respond at first. He didn’t know what to say or think or do.

“Will she be okay?”

“Maybe not now, but she will be. I don’t want you to tell anybody, just, um, when you get home can you change her sheets for me? And put a load of her laundry in?”

“Yeah, anything.”

“Alright. I love you, Jake.”

“I love you too, Dad.” Jacob hung up and Andy immediately turned back to you. The EMT’s were looking at your arms and your legs. That was the worst – the cuts because of the way you were tied up. There were no other signs of external torture except how tired you were, but when they asked if you’d been touched you nodded yes. Your dad walked back over to you, watching them.

“I’m her father, how does she look?” He said. One of the EMT’s, a woman in her twenties or so, stood up and took him aside.

“She looks alright on the outside. But she’s definitely malnourished, we’ll need to get her on some fluids in an IV. We found some signs of sexual assault that we want to check out at the hospital.”

“Can I take her home tonight? She needs to be home, with her family.”

“I think you should be able to. She could use some family right now. But who am I?” The woman left him to go to the front of the ambulance as they started to carry you onto the stretcher. Andy sent a text to his co-worker, explaining that he was going to be with you. He was Assistant District Attorney, but he was your father first. Especially now. He climbed into the ambulance right before they pulled away and shut the doors.

“They’re just gonna give you an IV right now, okay?” Andy said when he saw that you were looking around, your eyes unable to focus on anything. He grabbed onto your violently shaking hand, steadying it. One of the people in the ambulance started giving you an IV, but you were so lethargic you didn’t even notice. You just curled up next to your father and let them prick your arm until they found a vein. You almost fell asleep, but not quite. When they got you to the hospital the IV was done and you could feel it taking effect. You felt better, your cheeks were returning to their normal color, and you felt like you had at least a little energy. You let them do whatever to you – you let them inspect you, head to toe, and you wore some clothes that had been donated so the police could take your clothes for evidence. You were good. And finally they told your dad he could take you home.

“Are you hungry?” You tried to speak, but nothing came out. Your dad took that as a yes and got you some food, sitting in the parking lot so you could eat all you wanted, and after a full meal you were done. You felt like you were going to throw up because it was the fullest you’d been in two months, but you didn’t care. You were grateful for the food. And you were grateful for the way that your dad held your hand the whole drive home. You tried not to fall asleep – you wanted to see your mom, your brother, and you wanted to remember what it was like to exist.

“We’re home, honey,” your dad said softly. “You think you can walk? You could a little earlier.” You nodded and swung your legs out of the door, your feet on the solid ground of the driveway for a minute. The house didn’t look different, but it felt different. Everything felt different. Your mom’s hug when she greeted you at the door felt different. Your little brother’s hug felt different. You wanted to accept it, but you felt the food swimming in your stomach and ran to the downstairs bathroom.

You were fine, you insisted your mother as she walked into the door and rubbed your back. You were just overwhelmed, and even though you couldn’t say it, she saw it in your eyes. She helped you get up the stairs to your room, where Jacob had done your laundry so you had clean clothes and changed your sheets and un-made your bed for you. His room was right across the hall, your parents’ room right next door, and you felt safe enough there.

“Do you want to sleep now? Or take a shower first?” You couldn’t really answer her, so you nodded your head at the latter. She brushed her hand through your hair before telling you everything was the way it had been before. Before. Before the absolute hell your life had become. Before you were abducted from a parking lot because it was the one time you left your car unlocked. Before you had died on the inside just to stay alive on the outside.

“There’s my girl,” your dad said later as you walked down the stairs, dressed in an old t-shirt and your favorite sleep shorts, your hair so wet that it was dripping onto the hardwood floors. It was something they normally would have yelled at you for, but right now they didn’t care. You walked into the living room behind your dad to see that there were two cops and two men in suits, and you knew what they wanted to hear.

“No,” you said. That was the first time you’d been able to speak, and you grabbed onto your dad’s hand and shook your head. You didn’t want to talk about it. You didn’t want to talk about anything. You just wanted to exist.

“I know, honey, but you need to. They need a statement. The sooner it is the better, alright?” He didn’t push you into the room, but you knew that he wouldn’t have let them in if he thought it could wait. So you sat down in the same armchair as your dad, leaning on him for support, and you started talking. You told the room full of men everything. Everything – even when you felt your dad shift uncomfortably. Even when you realized there was a video camera in there, recording everything that you’d been saying. You thought for a minute that Jacob and your mom were listening, but they were gone. You could tell because her car was gone from the driveway. It was getting dark outside, too, by the time you got up to the point where your dad had found you.

“I’m sure she’s exhausted. So if you could save any questions for another time, that would be great,” your dad said to them when he saw your eyelids drooping. He was right – you were so tired. At least before you’d had a little bit of adrenaline inside of you. Now you had nothing. You were warm and safe in your home.

Your dad eventually got the men to go away and leave you alone as long as you promised to come by the police station the next time you woke up. You slept for almost two full days, only waking up to go to the bathroom, take sips of water, or throw up. Someone was always with you, sitting in the armchair in the corner of your room or watching you from across the hall, so that you were never alone. Half the time they just couldn’t believe that you were back home. And they knew it was you, you knew it was you, but you also knew that you were different. You’d seen things and been through things that Andy had literal nightmares about.

They used everything – the video of you at home talking, your clothes, the marks on your skin, the evidence they’d collected around you, to prove that this guy was a monster. He already was a monster, but that he’d kidnapped you from your car and intended to keep you. Your dad was on the case, on your side, doing everything in his power to make sure this guy never saw the light of day again. And then the day came that you were supposed to testify on the stand, just to get it to go to trial. You were one of three girls he’d kidnapped in the past, and your dad had them testify, too. But they were the hardest on you.

Your dad had given you his pendant that morning, he one he always wore. Always. It was St. Christopher. You knew he was raised Catholic, but you’d never thought of it beyond that. But when you pulled it over your neck, you felt protected. Even through all of the questions that would haunt you for years and years to come.

“How would you say your relationship was with your family before you left?” The other guy’s lawyer, a known shark, asked. You hated his choice of words.

“I didn’t leave willingly.”

“Answer the question, Miss Barber,” the judge said to you. You looked up at her and then back over at your dad, who was nodding.

“Happy. But strained. My dad and I were really close. My brother and I fought sometimes and got along other times. But my mom and I almost never saw eye to eye, on anything.”

“There are multiple records from fellow students at Archer of nights when you would engage in risky behavior at parties. Would you say that the relationship with your family led to your behavior on those nights?”

“I’m bipolar,” you responded. “I wasn’t on the right medication and sometimes I just did stupid things.” You hated saying it out loud, but your dad had told you that you had to tell everything, answer all of their questions, and there was no possible way you could lose.

“Your medical records show that you were on multiple controlled substances for your bipolar disorder, all of which you had taken on the day you disappeared.”

“Yeah.”

“The same ones that influenced your behavior on those nights. You were on that specific set of medication for six months.”

“Are you saying that you think my medicine and my relationship with my family made me voluntarily go with that man?” You asked. You could tell that was what the lawyer was getting at, even if he wasn’t saying it directly.

“Why, was that a possibility?”

“No. I got in my car that I’d left unlocked and some guy grabbed me out of it. If I went voluntarily, I wouldn’t have left my car and my phone like that.”

“Miss Barber, we’re not asking you to explain the evidence. This is a question for you to answer.” You looked at your dad when the judge spoke.

“No. I didn’t want to leave my family. My medicine wouldn’t make me do that.” Your eyes teared up just at that statement. They kept asking questions, some of which were to your advantage. But they were making it seem like you wanted to leave and eventually that was what broke you down. You shook your head, drying tears as you looked around the room and saw almost nobody on your side.

“We’ll reconvene in half an hour,” the judge finally said when you were fully crying. You stood up and your dad walked over to you, pulling you into a hug, as the rest of your family walked over to you.

“Come on,” your dad said. He led you into the room you’d been in earlier, a meeting room, where your lawyer was standing.

“Why are they trying to make it look like I left?” You asked. “Why are they trying to make it seem like it’s my fault?”

“Sweetie, that’s just their angle,” your dad explained. “It’s the only thing that they could dig up. They’re just trying to deflect.”

“They’re making me look crazy. You told me to tell them everything,” you told him, crossing your arms over your chest. Your brother was holding a bottle of water and handed it to you, looking over at you.

“You don’t look crazy,” he said quietly. “You look like someone hurt you.”

“Thank you,” you said.

“They’re going to put your family on the stand, most likely. And then this will all go away when they confirm that you aren’t crazy,” the lawyer said. You sat down in one of the big chairs, pulling your feet up to your chest, and tried to calm down.

“I didn’t run away,” you insisted to your father as he sat down beside you. “I wouldn’t. I told them that.”

“Everything’s gonna be okay, babe. I promise. If they try to fight with us, we’ll just fight back twice as hard. I need you to believe me when I say that this guy is going to go away. Whether it’s because of what he did to you or someone else, he’s going away. And he’s never gonna be able to hurt you again.” You nodded, doing your best to believe him.

“We got your back,” Jacob put in.

“If I could trade places with you, I would. In an instant. But I can’t. And I need you to be the strong girl I know you are.” You looked at your dad again, seeing nothing but pride on his face. Your mom just smiled at you – you’d been getting along so much better now that you were having to talk things through.

You went back out there, sitting up tall, and answered every question they asked you. They tried to fight you, but you didn’t back down. You weren’t going to. And the jury decided to indict the guy who did it. The trial was set for six months ahead, and even though it was a long time, there wasn’t a day your dad wasn’t trying to figure out how to make sure this guy pay for what he did.

A/N: This has to be one of my favorite requests yet! I loved writing this so I hope you like it too!

#andy barber imagine #andy barber x daughter!reader #andy barber fluff #andy barber angst #defending jacob imagine

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pbandjesse · 3 years

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Today was great and Im only frustrated that my lip has gotten worse again. I think from the friction from my mask and the heat all day made it worse. But my whole mouth area hurts and it sucks. Honestly, I am also just very sore. We did a lot of walking in the sun today!!

I didn't sleep great last night. I had weird nightmares again and I woke up with my lip all covered in dry blood. I was pretty upset about it and it would only get worse. I tried my best to baby it but there was only so much I could do.

I got washed up and dressed though. I was super excited for costume. I would end up wearing my corset open because it was a lot warmer then I expected. But I felt so cute. I loved how I did my hair, with two twisted braids under my headband. I was very pleased. My makeup would mostly wear away half way through the day but I still felt really good about it. James put on their costume so we could see how it looked before we left, just in case something had to change. But I think they looked great. The new shirt is so good and loots great on them. They would wear a regular shirt for the drive, so I put all our accessories and their costume in a tote bag to bring with us.

I was in a really chill mood overall. Jess was texting me all upset about feeling rushed and things not working the way she was hoping but I was chill and tried to give her some of that energy.

We left here and went to Mcdonalds before we drove the hour and a half to the ren faire.

And it was a good drive! The way there we made great time, we listened to a few episodes of the story podcast we listen to on long drives. We had lots of laughs because I kept saying dumb shit and James would tease me but in the best way. It was a good ride.

Jess was worried about the parking line but we got there a little after 1030 and there was no line at all! And they pulled in minutes after us!

It took us all a few minutes to get our costumes right and get ourselves together. But Jess and her brother and sister-in-law would come over to us and then we would all go in together.

We got in really fast. And for real it was barely crowded. Like there were crowds but nothing like Ive experienced in the past. We barely had to wait for anything. When we first got there we got lemonade and played with some photo opp things. I had a great time walking around and was for sure the leader of the day.

I would just lead us to what I thought was good. James was there for whatever and Jess didn't have anything specific. We didn't know what any shows were so we only ended up going to one. Which was the mud pit show. Which I always love. We caught a little of a few other shows but we should have probably planned that better. We did get to see the mermaids which was very cool though. She even had fangs.

I loved seeing people's costumes. And we ate a lot of different things. I had a smoothie. Me and Jess shared a pickle. Jess and James each had turkey legs. I had a baked potato. We would have kettle corn and I got a little sandwich. They got coffee and James shared an apple muffin with me. It was such a food day and it was great.

We didn't buy much beyond food. I did get to do things I never got to before. I got to do the gemstone panning thing. I have always wanted to do that but it always seemed expensive but it was $15 and I got some awesome stones and really had a great time. And James got me one of those copper roses and I always wanted one of those. So it was pretty great.

We would do a lot of walking. A lot of people watching. Going in shops. Enjoying the company. We watched the glass blowing demo. We got James sized for a kilt and the men who ran that place were so excited that were getting married. They apparently also do rentals and gave us their card so we can get something for James that we know is nice. I think we even know the color.

I really had a great day. I was tired but like in a good way. We went to the dungeon and read about all the scary things people did to each other. James found someone's wallet?? So we gave that to the woman at the front. I hope it made its way back to the owner.

We did see a poor girl who was wasted wasted and an actor came to check on her because she was double over on her self, looked asleep, but then security staff and first aid came and checked on her to get her some water and find her friends. I hope she is okay.

We surprisingly didn't see to many embarrassingly drunk people, for being Octoberfest. It was fun seeing people in all kinds of costumes though and I was having a great time.

Jess was moving very slow because her feet hurt and we kept losing her. So to keep James slow I held their hand and to keep Jess with us I held her hand and we were a little train. A man at a booth laughed at us and said we needed a leash when I told him why we were doing this. But it worked!!

Jess got a precious hat. And then we bought honey products. We ran into her brother and sister in law and it was decided we wouldn't stay through the end and instead leave at 530ish.

So we got our last snacks and headed to the front to wait.

Me and Jess talked for a while while James filled our water bottle. And then we went out to sit in a gazebo and take some costume pieces off. It was just a wonderful day. I am so glad we got to go. Lookign through my posts we haven't been there together since 2014, me and James went to the Maryland one ins 2018. But it has been forever so this was just the best. And I get to see Jess again next Tuesday so it wasn't even that sad saying goodbye.

I was excited to go home. But we had some issues. We ended up going on the wrong exit on the turnpike and had to go twenty miles out of the way to turn around. And then we had another wrong turn and it was another 20 minutes added.

But we stopped for donuts and tacos after that. Donuts for James and tacos for me. And we listened to more tanis and enjoyed the sunset.

We got home around 830. Washed up and now were in bed. My lips are hurting really bad and have split open again. Im going to get actual neosporn tomorrow. Auquafore just isn't cutting it.

But now is time for rest.

I hope tomorrow is beautiful for all of you. Goodnight everyone!!

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100layersofdaddyissues · 4 years

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Angel - Chapter 5

AGHHHH I KNOW IM SORRY it was an involuntary hiatus brought on by the horrible holiday we call christmas, but its here, ive had this idea since the beginning so i hope you like it!

rach im sorry this ones for you my queen of angst i hope i did you proud

In retrospect maybe taking personal leave directly after your fight with Maxwell probably didn't fit in with the image you wanted to portray to him, you’d hoped it looked as though you truly didn't care about what he said to you. But you did. You wish you didn't, honest, you'd been burnt by men before, you shouldn't have been surprised that once you caught feelings you would be in trouble. But you thought “if he truly doesn't care about me then it won't matter to him that I’m not there, he won't even notice.” you'd still been working from home, you've been keeping up all your professional correspondence, he won't notice, so why should you care about him either.

Little did you know however, that the morning after his outburst, Maxwell had returned to the apartment you had presided in, expecting you to be there. But you weren’t. He wanted to apologise, to grovel and fall to his knees and beg you to forgive him. To tell you that he was an idiot and he never meant to hurt you and that he, well, he had very strong feelings for you that were really, really beginning to scare him.

That night had been the first time he'd ever lost sleep over something in years.

Ever since he had lost his fiancée, Alice, Max made sure to never become attached to anyone, knowing how much pain it will cause him when they inevitably leave. Everyone left, whether it be willingly or not. His grandparents left, his parents, the woman he would have died for, and now you. He wasn't sure where you fit in there, his grandparents taught him to find happiness in everything, his parents taught him how to live, how to run the business he loved so much, and Alice taught him to love. And you. You taught him how to love again, you taught him compassion and kindness that he'd long lost. Before you he had promised himself that he would never feel pain again. But here he was, dealing with the consequences of breaking that sacred rule, and he hated it.

Max had hoped that he'd perhaps be able to speak to you at work, get you alone in your office, sadistically, somewhere you couldn't escape him, but alas, when he arrived early in the morning, two coffees in hand, Sookie had been there to greet him, letting him know that you were taking leave and working from home. He didn't press the issue, in fact he didn't say anything, just mumbled a quiet “you have this then” while passing her the second coffee.

Maybe he could call you to apologise, but it seemed pathetic to him to even consider apologising over the phone, after what he had said to you, you truly deserved the most heartfelt apology he could muster. But as the days went on and turned into weeks with you not at the apartment or at work, he slowly gave up. Max’s head started to fill with thoughts that maybe you were preparing to leave the company, to leave him. He had convinced himself that if you stayed with the company then you were staying with him.

He didn’t know why he had assumed that it would be easy, you’d proven to be anything but, he’d hoped he could just apologise, and then fuck you enough to prove it. But no. it wasn't going to be that easy.

Maxwell didn't want to admit it. But he missed you.

For the first week he stayed at the apartment every night, away from his home, just hoping that you would return for something. All of the clothes he'd paid for were still there, the kitchen was still stocked, you'd even left cigarettes in a pack on the balcony. It hurt to see how quickly you'd left him; you were obviously rushing to get away from him. He really fucked up. And he had no idea how to fix it.

He really fucking missed you. How soft your lips were, your cheeks reminded him of soft marshmallows for some reason. He missed the way the sun used to hit your face in the mornings as he was getting ready to leave the apartment, you always looked so beautiful, the golden light bathing you in a constant glow, he always felt content in those moments. Like nothing could ever go wrong or be bad, he simply let himself live in that moment, pretending that he could stay like that forever. And for some reason, he had convinced himself that h couldn’t stay. Every morning like that, where he left, the pain inside of him grew deeper and more unbearable.

And now all of that was gone, and it was his fault.

You missed him too. You hadn't left your apartment in almost three weeks, and you had intended for it to stay that way until Jade had shown up at your apartment this morning.

“Listen, I'm sorry that Mr. Handsome was a cunt, but I did warn you, you can't wallow here for the rest of your life. You've kept the job, and your apartment is dirt cheap, so I know you're loaded, you know what that means? We're going day drinking.”

“I don't want to go day drinking. I want to sit in my cocoon and rewatch the Brady Bunch, I'm not hurting anyone.�� you said trying to release from her grasp. You had no intentions of being seen in public.

“Well too fucking bad, George is going to be here soon and he’s bringing me a friend, so you can’t fuck this up because I’ve been trying to get Robert to ask me out for weeks. We're going.” she said, beginning to pull out your makeup and go through it.

You walked towards her to ask what she was looking for until you clocked what she had said. “Wait did you just say George? As in George, my ex-coworker? Why is he coming over?” you asked your tone growing in urgency as your questions progressed.

“Well, when I was talking to him, he asked where you been, so I explained that you'd been working for Maxwell lord and that you’d not left your room in weeks after a big fight with your boss I’m not an id- OW! why are you throwing things at me?”

“Because! When George saw me on the street that night, I told him that it had been a fight with my boyfriend! Now he's going to think Maxwell was my boyfriend! I'm in so much trouble if he tells anyone that!” You refused to panic. At least that's what you were telling yourself as you got more and more breathless, you're truly trying not to panic but god is it hard to convince your brain not to have an anxiety attack.

“Listen Y/N if he thinks Max is your boyfriend so what, he isn't anymore, so what's the deal?” how Jade could be so nonchalant about this began to frustrate you, this could ruin you. Didn't she realise that? “Get up and shower I’m sure they are almost here.” apparently not.

And surely enough, just after you had gotten dressed there was a loud knock at the door, Jade went to answer it, hoping to distract the boys while you threw your hair together.

You overheard their idle chatter, something about the work at halo being boring and Henry being a dick. Nothing you didn't already know.

As you emerged you saw the two boys sitting on your couch and Jade standing in the kitchen. You'd never realised how small this apartment was until you were sitting here with others and everything felt so cramped. You missed your place with Max. you shouldn't say that. It wasn't your house with him. It was his place. You were staying there.

“Hey guys! Sorry I was just fixing up my hair, should we head?” you try to sound as cheery as you could. You were not ready for this day.

George slipped past you, saying something about “I just need the loo, I can lock up and meet you downstairs.” yeah, like you were going to let him do that, deciding to shoot jade and Robert downstairs, telling them you'd wait for George to get out and then come downstairs with him.

He was taking an unusually long time in the bathroom, and all you could think was “dear god please tell me he's not pooping in there,” as you went to knock on the door to check if he was okay, you heard a loud bang, felt unbearable heat, and then, saw only black.

Maxwell had been staring out his window all day, he wasn't sure why, but he had been compelled to stare at the skyline, take in how beautiful the city really was. Returning from his office he sat down to do the exact thing he had been doing all morning, until he noticed a pillar of smoke coming from the south side of the city. A bolt of fear ran through him as he remembered picking Y/N up from her apartment in the south downtown area of DC.

Immediately he called his assistant for the week and told her to access employee records for Y/N’s address, then he called the Fire Chief for the DC area, asking for the address of the most current fire that he can see burning from his window. And his worst fear was realised. They're the same address, it's Y/N’s apartment that's up in flames, and he's sitting in his high rise just watching it happen.

Maxwell stormed out of his office yelling at the girl to have Darius in the car waiting for him at the front doors by the time he gets down to them or she's fired. Logically he knew that she had no control over that, but he was in a rush and he didn't care to care about her. He didn't even know her name. Something with a B maybe? This is not what he should be thinking about right now.

He should be thinking about how the second chance he had at love was in danger and he had no idea what to do except go to her. That's if she even still lived there, what if she moved and she was absolutely fine, and here he was running around like a headless chicken hoping that she was okay when she could be fine; “yeah,” he thought, “she’s fine, I’m just going to go check up on the building just in case she's there and if she isn't then I will just go back to the office.” yeah because it was going to be that simple. Everything leading up to this point sure has been.

“Master Lord, I have to ask why we were driving to the downtown area in the middle of the workday?” Darius asked him with a careless tone as if he was expecting Maxwell to say that he just wanted a coffee.

“I have reason to believe Y/N is in trouble and I would like to ensure that she's not, now is that okay with you?” Maxwell knew he was being an ass, but he also knew that Darius cared for her too and that was accentuated in the way he stepped on the gas not saying a word, as if speed limits were not a problem.

They were outside the apartment building in less than ten minutes, Maxwell racing out of the car before it was even parked. He stood in front of the building gulfed in flames staring at it feeling a sense of hopelessness.

“Oh no you fucking don’t, Mister.” he heard someone say but barely paid any attention until a young woman got up in his face. “I’m talking to you Richie Rich what the fuck do you think you’re doing here? You yell at her, make her miserable, don't speak to her for weeks and then suddenly when she's in trouble you're here? To what? save the day? Sorry to break it to you dude but money is an accelerant so it’s probably best that you fuck off.” she shouted at him. He had no idea who this woman was but from what he had heard she obviously knew Y/N.

“Wait she's in trouble? She's in there?” he didn't even think to ask who she was all he wanted to know was if she was okay.

“Yes, she's in there, fires have been burning long enough for you to get down here do you see her on a stretcher? No, she's still in there, my best friend is in there and if she doesn't come out of there alive, I'm going to blame you. if it weren't for you going all macho alpha bullshit man then she wouldn’t have felt the need to leave that apartment up town, she wouldn't have moved back into this shit hole, and she would have been at work today instead of watching brady bunch reruns for the last 12 days straight. So, for your sake you better hope she comes out of there alive or I’m going to kill you for killing her.” Max had barely had the time to process the thought before he was tearing up, light sniffles coming from his nose as he tried to hold them back.

“Right, you're ahh… you're completely right, this is my fault, and believe me, I wish nothing more than to be able to take that night back, to make sure it never happened, because all I want right now is to hold her, and, and tell her, tell her that I love her. Because I do. I really do, and if I never get the chance to tell her that then I promise you can blame me forever and make my life a living hell but right now, all I want to do is focus on getting her out of there alive so excuse me for just one second please.” Maxwell walked away from her after saying his piece walking directly to the man who looked to be in charge of the fight.

“Excuse me, hi, I’m going to need you to go immediately to 21b and save the woman in there, she is of utmost importance do you hear me?”

“Sir, I'm sorry but we're going apartment by apartment trying to get everyone out. We can't just take priority for some girl,” the man said to him, slightly condescending as if he hadn't just asked the man to save the love of his life.

‘Here, you take this,'' Maxwell said while fishing out his wallet and handing the man his ID card, “and I’m going to call Chief Wallace, shall I? Or are we going to stop wasting time and you’re going to go get my girl out of that fucking building son?” Max’s tone was commanding, he would get what he wanted, and he knew that much.

“Yes sir, I’ll go retrieve her myself right away.” the man said while running towards his truck, Maxwell presumed for him to suit up.

As he walked back towards the group that Darius had now joined, the woman, whose name he still couldn't remember or hadn't been told, had a relieved and vaguely smug look on her face. “You know she's going to kill you when she finds out you manipulated the fire department into saving her first right?” she said watching Y/N’s window for any sign of movement.

“I know, but it's worth the price to have her here to threaten to kill me.” he said staring at the same window.

“Sorry, I know that was really rude of me, I’m Jade, I'm not sure if Y/N has mentioned me, this is Robert and George, two of our friends, guys this is Max, Y/N’s... Friend?”

“Yeah, I think it's best we go with a friend for now. I'd like to live long enough to be able to change that.” Maxwell slightly chuckled. He felt lighter, she wasn't safe but the hope he felt made him feel better.

Until he saw he being carried out, on the right side of her body her skin was burnt, he clothes blackened and singed, she looked lifeless, Maxwell heard nothing but silence and the ringing in his ears as he ran to take her from the man, Maxwell took her from his arms, and fell to the floor, he watched her, waiting for movement, and like the glimmer of hope he had held on to paid off, her chest moved slowly and minutely, but it moved, she was breathing.

Maxwell let go then, as he held her to him and sobbed into her, pushing the hair out of her face, being careful not to touch her skin while the paramedics brought over a stretcher, he didn't want to let her go, he just got her back he couldn't let her go.

He couldn't hear anyone, but he felt a hand on his shoulder and Jade's sympathetic eyes filled with her own tears staring down at her. That compelled him to stand up and lay her on the stretcher. The paramedics asked if he wanted to ride to hospital with her, but he looked at Jade and gestured for her to go. He knew that if she woke up on the way, the first face she saw after almost dying shouldn't be the man that put her in that situation.

He followed the ambulance into the city, finding jade within minutes, they sat in the waiting room for 8 hours, just hoping for some good news, they talked about how Max and Y/N met and how he knew he was in love and everything he can't wait to do with her if she gives him the chance. The conversation lulled around hour 5 with Jade opting to nap in the highly uncomfortable hospital chairs, urging Maxwell to follow in her suit but he couldn't sleep until he knew how she was. He needed answers the moment they were available to him.

By the time it was almost hour 9 a doctor came to them.

“She's going to be just fine, the burns aren't too severe, however she did inhale a lot of smoke shop she's going to be rusty on the talking for a few days and her respiratory system is going to take a while to recover, so it's up to you to make sure she doesn't overexert herself okay? Other than that, she’s out of surgery, so you can go see her, but just make sure it's only 1-2 people at a time. This is a very traumatic time for her and it's only going to get worse before it gets better but I’m sure with a husband like you it won't be so hard for her to recover.” the doctor finished with a small smile and then walked back down the hall to attend to other patients he assumed.

Husband. She thought he was Y/N’s husband. And honestly, he didn't want to correct her on it. He liked the idea of being her husband. Even if it wasn't real.

“Hey Jade, come on wake up, we can go see her now.” Jade sat bolt upright when she heard those words. Asking for her room number and bolting towards the door, with Maxwell following behind slowly. He reached her door and saw her sleeping, so peacefully, the LED lights of the hospital only served to make her look more pale and sickly than she already was, but she still looked beautiful to him. Absolutely perfect.

Just before he could join Jade in the room his cell began to ring. “Maxwell Lord.” he answered, not expecting any calls on this thing, it’s 1984 who has this phone number?

“Mr. Lord I’m sorry to interrupt you, I know you're extremely busy with your wife, but I just had a matter to discuss with you about the fire in her building.” The man on the other end, Chief Wallace, sounded nervous, almost trembling, “I'm not entirely sure how to explain this, but preliminary investigation we conducted into the cause of the fire has indicated that the fire was started in Ms. Y/L/N’s apartment.”

“I'm afraid we're going to need to question her when she becomes lucid enough for a police interview.”

tags: @innerstrawberrypolice @maxlordsgf @mrschiltoncat @historianwithaheart

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