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the-woman-in-the-writing · 5 years

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“When the Moon Walked Among Us” a short fiction

Rating: PG Word Count: 3,164

Author’s note: I’ve always been good at remembering my dreams, and that seemed like a useless talent until I dreamed the world ended. I wrote this story as a way of preserving how vivid and realistic (yet a bit weird) my dream was, though please take note that I am not the narrator (in my stories, the narrator is never me). I didn’t revise, add, or deleted any scene or part in this dream-story. Everything you’re about to read was purely dreamed by yours truly.

Maybe it was the end of the world. Maybe it wasn’t. They never knew for sure what it was and why it happened. Only one thing was clear: nothing was ever the same again. Not after everything…

No.

People came together all over the world to watch the Super Moon. They packed their tents and barbecues, set up camp in wherever there was a clear field and open sky, turned off their lights, and waited. Families, friends, lovers, and strangers. We all came to watch the Super Moon that was said to last for a whole day. People chatted with one another, talking about their families or whoever they came with, over burgers and beer. The children made new friends and played by the sunset with their flashlights and food wrapper paper planes.

Everyone waited for the Super Moon.

They said it will be the most beautiful thing you’ll ever see. And it was. Despite everything that happened after, it really was.

When the evening came and everyone had piled up beside their tents and prepared their telescopes or binoculars, the Super Moon came into view: beautiful, big, round, and luminous, tinged and glowing with a creamy orange light that everyone marveled at. We were wolves staring at the moon, waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. It was so close that you could almost see every spot and crater in great detail even without a telescope or binoculars.

Then we went home, talked about it on the drive, posted pictures of it on the internet with stupid captions and hashtags, and showed it on the news. But as the world spun around this captivating piece of heaven, we all took turns, the people of the world. Of viewing. Of taking photos. Of making art. Of writing poetry. At one point you could say everyone was looking at the same thing as you could never miss it, this beautiful thing.

Later, people will believe that the Super Moon brought the world together for one tiny yet impactful moment in history. Not everyone will think so, but most will.

But we would all agree that this was the beginning.

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” - Romans 8:18

II.

No one could sleep.

When it started, no one knew why. Everyone in the world shifted in their beds and wondered why it was 2am and they couldn’t sleep. Though we all woke up on time, in sync with our 7am alarm, the atmosphere felt like noon: hot and awake. At work or at school we all exchanged, I couldn’t sleep last night’s and me too’s, and two hours after we all ate our lunches the sun was already setting. We were all confused. That night, no one got a good night’s sleep.

We asked the scientists, but some of them kept silent. Some of them said it was normal. We didn’t know what to think; we just wanted to sleep.

After a while, people started getting sick or getting into accidents. Most of us developed insomnia and loss of appetite. Those who started falling asleep again began while they were driving on their way to work. By the end of the month, most of the headlines yelled CRASH, DEAD, and INJURED. Children cried out of fear, wondering why they couldn’t avoid the darkness of the night by sleeping. Their parents grumbled, tired and sleepless as well.

Our days shortened. Life felt fast with our 16-hour days, but we’re humans. Of course, we found a way to adjust to it eventually. We stayed up all night partying, reading, drinking, texting, praying, and wandering; we opened and closed our stores much later; we extended our Late, Late Shows; and we made clocks that had shorter hours.

That didn’t mean we slept well and regularly again. Sometimes we would still shift in our beds and turn our pillows over and under our heads. The digits of 8 midnight would seem to blink endlessly by our bedside table. And if sleep was hopeless, we all stared at the moon, which was closer than it was three months ago.

“Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed…” - 1 Corinthians 15:51

III.

It was all over the news: a lion with a school of dead fish washed up ashore on a beach in India. No one knew where the lion came from or how it made it all the way there, but people were speculating it had something to do with the moon and how it traveled a hundred thousand kilometers closer to us in just five months.

Again, we asked the scientists. And again, they either kept silent or said it was normal.

It’s part of the earth’s natural process.

It was bound to happen sooner or later.

It’s nothing to worry about.

From 384, 400 kilometers to 274, 575, we knew that was something to worry about, but we didn’t know everything. The how’s and the why’s. So, we relied on the scientists, because in science we trust and in God we doubt.

No one lived by the beaches anymore, even fishermen. By day, beaches would get so dry that you could walk for three hours and see nothing but land still. You’d step on a dead baby crab once in a while and by the time you’re looking back to where you came from, your legs would be gift-wrapped with seaweed and glittered with sand. At first, we couldn’t figure out the best way to fish and go on cruises because by night the water would get so high that it would swallow up any structure within fifty kilometers. In Ireland they say you’d be able to climb half of a sea cliff during the night.

After a while, the ecosystem went crazy and we went hungry. Partly because we’d just been adjusting to the 16-hour days, but mainly because the animals had a harder time getting used to it. Most of the fishes we caught were dead, and no one dared to fish in the middle of the night as weather became more unpredictable. Crops were no exception. Half of them died along with the marine life.

But then again, we were humans. We found a way to survive.

Almost everything we ate were manufactured in a shape of a cylinder or cube. We wrote recipe books that said, “101 Ways to Cook Canned Food” or “Canned You Cook This?” And we hid almost every vegetable we had left in fear of someone stealing it. Then by moonlight, if we felt having something that reminded us of how the world used to be, we would eat our roasted genetically modified chickens and our children would say, “Daddy, daddy, the moon is the size of my fist!”

“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.” - 2 Timothy 3:1

IV.

Our days shortened to 14 hours and depending on which part of the world you lived in, you either bathed in the sun or crept in the dark for more than half a day. The lands were cracked eggshells in Southern Asia and Africa, just like their skin. News reporters, missionaries, and tourists who travelled from the cold, dark North cried at swimming pools and parks because they missed the heat, and sometimes children would mistake them for ghosts or banshees.

Earth’s tilt was at 45-degrees and up in the North, where it almost snowed all year-round with only a month to melt almost half of the ice. People who didn’t die to lack of sleep or hunger died in the cold; in the South, they dried up like beef jerky. And before even Christmas arrived there were already no feeding programs or charity cases anymore, because all the beggars were dead and buried under our snow.

One time, a friend said, “My daughter came home from school and gave me her drawing. Their teacher had asked them to draw and color different kinds of people from all over the world and you know what? Even the Asian is black now!” We laughed for a second or so, but we stopped for a lot of reasons.

“You know, you could draw the moon and the sky and still use the same crayons.”

He replied, “The moon will take half of the paper though”

“And if those days had not been cut short, no human being would be saved. But for the sake of the elect those days will be cut short.” - Mark 13:20

Big, bold letters sprawled across every outlet store, every shopping center, and every thrift shop, and they all spelled the same thing: WINTER CLOTHES FOR SALE. We scavenged the last of our animals that could provide us warmth and security because nothing says, “We will survive this deadly winter” like wool jackets made from our frozen sheep and a pair of leather gloves, freshly skinned from our endangered cows.

Then the world figured out how to get what it wants. The North began to ask the South for animals: chickens, pigs, cows – every farm animal you can find in a children’s story book. Because no animal we could eat could survive the winter that long and we don’t know where the fishes went. On the other hand, the South asked for vegetables and lots of ice. And finally, we were able to travel conveniently again when we’ve figured out where to put all the ice, and the people of the South were happy as long as they got fresh vegetables on their plates and ice to keep them hydrated and cool. It didn’t matter that their forests and crops burned up and that their rivers were nothing but empty veins, because it was enough that they ate and drank.

It wasn’t easy, of course. We all complained. We all asked the scientists.

“How do we survive?”

We no longer asked if we were going to be okay or if they were lying about half of the world being frozen and the other half burning as something normal, and that we will be finishing the year earlier than expected. The scientists said there was nothing to worry about. We had to take their word for it, because what could we do if even they can’t do something about it?

So, no one just talked about the moon that watched over us, except maybe for the Internet that made jokes and funny pictures about it.

What’s important was that we made it out of this alive.

So, our scientists – all kinds – genetically modified our animals and manipulated our crops; they reproduced fishes in their laboratories; they made special facilities for storing water; they invented brand new foods with whatever was left to help get us all the nutrients we need; and they gave us technology and guides to help us do all of this at home.

If the sky was clear, we would find ourselves looking at the moon and its craters and spots, with our faces painted with moonlight. We were still wolves waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. Something that could survive all this.

We prayed.

Even though in science we trust and in God we doubt.

“Pray that it may not happen in winter. For in those days there will be such tribulations as has not been from the beginning of the creation that God created until now, and never will be.” - Mark 13:19

VI.

What follows is a series of tragedies: tragedies we know of; tragedies we named; tragedies that weren’t 14-hour days, mass animal endangerment, world famine, or a half-frozen, half melting world – tragedies that we were used to.

Earthquakes and the tsunamis that followed sunk islands as we welcomed a new year. All the small countries that lived on islands no longer resurfaced; their people would’ve been declared extinct if it weren’t for migration. If somebody were to make a world map at that time, you’ll no longer find Singapore, Malaysia, Brunei, Fiji, Cuba, or any of the islands as small as them on the map. Half of Japan and Indonesia sunk, and only a quarter of the Philippines resurfaced.

We lost seven percent of the world population. That’s half a billion people crushed by debris and drowned with the resources they traded all over the world. All their memories of their childhoods, first loves, and heartbreaks were reduced to nothing but rocks in the ocean to be covered by algae or barnacles. They were Atlantis, and a story come true have never felt so tragic.

People were devastated, of course. But we were all very hungry too. Those who weren’t affected by the earthquakes refused to help. There were incoming hurricanes and we all thought,

The dead will remain dead.

Half a billion people don’t need food, shelter, or medicine anymore.

There was no use in sharing resources with the few hundreds of survivors when more than a billion need it to stay alive.

Some people thought it was cruel and selfish, but by then we weren’t humans anymore. We were savages scraping what was left of the world we destroyed. And as much as we hate to eat and drink what should’ve been shared to the survivors of the Great Sink, we still did. We were all so hungry. God, we were hungry.

Then the hurricanes came along with their floods, landslides, and tornadoes, and they killed us and our animals. Homes were destroyed. Families were separated. Children were orphaned. There were about five billion people left in the world.

This must be a bad dream, we thought.

A sick joke.

That’s what this is.

“There will be great earthquakes, and in various places famines and pestilences. And there will be terrors and great signs from heaven.” - Luke 21:11

VII.

People found evidence of advanced technology being developed and used by scientists, the same ones who told us that the world was not ending. (Or so we believed.)

There was a mass production of high-tech projectors and weather instruments that were launched into space to control what we saw on the horizon and what we didn’t. (Or so they say.)

The media was accused and persecuted for false news and being paid of hush-money to keep the so-called truth a secret. (Or so we wanted.)

Hundreds of data was discovered to contain information about a world-wide human experiment determining the effects of a global catastrophe and series of disasters on human behavior. (Or so they say.)

We imprisoned CEOs, scientists, and news reporters. We raided their homes, stole their food and clothes, and hurt their loved ones. We killed them in our dreams every night and ripped them limb by limb in the sleepless ones as we lay on the floors of our wrecked home, covered in snow or in sweat, and still staring at the moon that isn’t back to its rightful, safe distance. (And so we did.)

Everything will be back to normal once we shut down all those projectors and controllers. We will learn to live again and be humans.

And the world was not ending after all.

(And that’s what we wanted to believe.)

“And then many will fall away and betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray. And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold.” - Matthew 24:10-12

VIII.

People came together all over the world to watch the world end. They held their children or whoever they had left, gathered food and shared them with others as a last act of kindness, set up camp in wherever there was a field with no debris or remnant of a human being, and waited. Families, friends, lovers, and strangers. We all came to witness The Day that was said to last a lifetime. People chatted with one another, talking about their families or whoever they lost, over empty stomachs and chapped lips. The children stayed with the adults and clung onto them with unending fear and the memory of a lost childhood.

Everyone waited for The Day.

They said it will be the most dreadful thing you’ll ever see. And it was. Despite everything that happened before, it really was.

When the hour came and everyone had piled up beside the broken homes or fallen trees, the moon stared right us as always: terrifying, big, round, luminous, and waiting to collide with our fallen earth. We were wolves staring at the moon, waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. It was so close that you could almost see every calamity and loss you’ve endured the past year in great detail even without a telescope, binoculars, or a washed-up family album or baby shoes.

We stayed and faced our inevitable fate. Some still managed to post pictures of it on the internet with stupid captions and hashtags. There were even people who showed it on the news. But as the world spun around this frightening piece of heaven, we all took turns, the people of the world. Of viewing. Of taking photos. Of crying. Of hugging and kissing one last time. Everyone was living the Day as you could never miss it, even if you wanted to.

And we all believed that the moon will crash into us and wipe us out for old times’ sake, but it wasn’t much later that we heard the most chilling, bone shattering sound we ever got to hear: the sound of the moon cracking, like a breaking iceberg, echoing into our souls, and resonating as weeping and almost hushed screams.

Some people swore they saw Christ come out of the moon, accompanied by angels. Not everyone believes so.

But we all agreed that when we saw pieces of the moon falling down on us in slow motion, helpless and blazing, that it was disturbingly beautiful.

It was then that I kissed my wife for the last time.

“But in those days, after that tribulation, the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light, and the stars will be falling from heaven; and the powers of heaven will be shaken.” - Mark 13:24-25

E P I L O G U E

There were survivors and they were less than a hundred. They spent the last days on earth, freezing, weeping, and gnashing their teeth in the dark. The sun died. The moon is gone. There is only but loneliness living and walking among the few humans who had gathered up the will to keep on breathing.

They couldn’t accept that that was the end of the world. If it was, there shouldn’t have been anyone left. But there was, and it was them.

Soon, they realized there was nothing left to do but wait.

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thedankfaerie · 4 years

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i am posting this here because i am tired of burdening my boyfriend with my feelings. this is a little nsfw. and this is my call for help. i dont know who to talk to anymore about this.

i need someone to hear what i feel

or at least, a free space to say what i feel

im in a low place. i feel so awful about myself and my body and i hate this feeling. i hate that this time last year, i was so happy about the way i looked. i was working this awful job that had me so overworked and overtired and poorly treated that i skipped meals and slept through meals regularly... i lost so much weight from stress in just a year and was the skinniest i had ever been. mentally, i was not in a good place being exploited by my managers... but my self esteem re: my body was at a new level i never knew could exist for me.

last year, i felt powerful and confident about my body, and i expressed that through sexuality. i was fucking my ex that i still liked (i grew out of wanting him back, but he never did, and it was nice to have the upper hand). i was also fucking an old fwb that i stayed friends with, that was also recently single, so we reunited again at the perfect time. i was also seeing this one guy (now my boyfriend) so if ever i got tired of the sex i at least was able to calm down and settle down with someone who genuinely wanted to know me. of course, i ended up catching feelings for this guy, and cut off the other two to pursue something more serious (we are now dating and are moving in together next month!) anyways, it was so nice to be wanted. to feel... i guess sexy? sex is empowering. and it shouldn’t be taboo to say that as a woman, or anyone really. i dont want to give off the message that a woman’s validation is fueled by men’s desire - but hey, don’t you feel flattered when someone thinks you’re attractive? desire and lust aren’t everything... but they matter. and they have an impact on how you feel about yourself, whether or not you believe me when i say that is up to you.

and i hate that i would gladly put myself through the stress that i did just to feel happy about my body. before the summer ended, i finally had enough and i quit my shitty job. i was jobless for a month, but was able to enjoy the rest of the summer with my new ‘skinny’ body - last year i took my first bikini picture ... a 2 piece! i have never done that. i still think about how happy i was that summer to look and feel good about myself.

i have struggled with self esteem issues since highschool. i always felt like i was too big. i used to follow all these blogs of pretty people and try to copy their poses to feel pretty and i used to spend hours after school trying on short dresses and clothes to stare at my body in the mirror. i used to starve myself to the point of literally wanting to faint on the daily, until finally i admitted it to one of my teachers. she respectfully asked if i wanted to speak with the school guidance counsellor, and i declined. but she encouraged me to speak up to at least a friend, so i did, and it helped, and for a long time, i was okay. after i graduated that teacher still checked up on me for a few years every now and again.

4th year university was when i realized how much i had let myself go. i was the heaviest i had ever been, it was my graduating year, i was looking for a job and was always worried about my grades. every time i was stressed or every time i needed to study i bought pad thai and bubble tea. a ritual. i didnt realize how much that had caught up to me until i saw old pictures of myself. at this point, i started my (shitty) job, straight out of graduation.

i actively avoided scales, i didn’t like looking at the number because it just made me upset. and i already felt upset looking in the mirror, i didn’t need something else to make me upset. but i did. and i was 20 pounds heavier than i was in highschool - the heaviest i had ever been.

i cried.

i didnt do much about it. i was too busy. my first job out of uni was a brand new daycare and i was head teacher of a toddler class - also i was the only staff on floor since there were not as many kids. there was nobody to train me, at all. i had to teach myself everything. i had no time.

a little while before starting the job, i met this guy. he was so hot, but such a dick - we had a “thing” but it was so toxic. he started off interested in me, but i turned him down. his attitude changed and he started being a douche, but we became friends because we were seeing each other so often. i didn’t have a car yet. he was driving me everywhere. he lived 5 minutes away. he was the type of friend that would text me “im outside, lets go out”. we hung out as friends at first, we would have “study dates”, until we started hooking up. we acted like a thing but he denied we were ever one - but got mad at me whenever i tried to look elsewhere. but i guess in that time, it was nice to be wanted, especially by someone so attractive.

but again, a year in that shithole job went by fast. i would stay late after work. i would come in on weekends. i was expected to not only help new kids transition, but train new partners. and given that my supers refused to support me, i watched a lot of people quit due to pressure. i had to keep retraining. and kids kept coming. that never stopped. i can honestly say my class wasn’t settled until december, and i started in september. everyday it was ‘its fine, it will get better’.

a year in that shithole, with 0 support, and i lost all the weight i gained - and more. i was the skinniest i had ever been. even in highschool. i looked at old pictures of myself from when i started the job at my heaviest. i couldnt believe that was me. and i was so happy looking at myself in the mirror. for once!

after i quit that job, i started another job that i hoped would be a happy ending.

and it wasn’t. it stressed me out just as much. i also moved out by this point, a month after i started this job. my hours are whack. 7-9, 11:30-6. i woke up early and got home late. i never had free time. my last shift at my old job was 7-3:30 and i had the whole day to myself. im someone that needs social interaction and alone time, and by the time i got home i was so tired, i would just cook, clean, shower, and go to bed. and that was my life. sometimes i would get so tired that i couldn’t cook, i just went and ate out. i tried to make personal time with my friends after work but by the time i reached their house, it was late, and places were closed. and id have to leave early anyways because i had work early the next day... so fast food was the only way to make this work. on top of this, this was the most difficult class that i had ever had. the kids behaviours’ were so difficult and i couldn’t handle it. i would cry in my car 3x a week. i would cry 4 minutes before my shift starts in the washroom and walk out and pretend i was okay. i would have my boyfriend come over as much as i could just so i could cry in his arms. i couldnt leave this job because i had just moved out and having a consistent rent payment was a huge responsibility for me. as well, if you know anything about ECEs in canada, just know we make shit pay. but this job pays me better than most ECE jobs... by a landslide. AND gives me benefits, which is so hard to find. i am still at this job - i was at my breaking point at the time covid started, so i was rejoicing when we closed for covid. i havent worked since march, but i needed that time off so desperately.

with that being said, i gained the weight back.

not everything, but i definitely could tell i was packing on some pounds.

cue covid.

i havent worked since march. i fell back into a lazy routine of ordering fast food. lying in bed. resting. just enjoying NOT dealing with my difficult class.

but i gained it all back. and i think im back at my heaviest weight. i picked up all my summer clothes from last year from my moms... half of them dont fit me. my favourite pair of shorts won’t close. i just sat and cried in a mess of clothes on my floor in front of the mirror. this was last week.

im trying to tell myself, ‘you’re in the middle of a global pandemic, go easy on yourself’... but do you know what it’s like to finally get what you’re chasing, and have it be taken away from you? i finally had a taste of what it was like to look AND feel good about myself. something ive wanted since i was a teenager...and it’s gone. it’s my fault and i accept that, so please don’t tell me i did this to myself. i know i did. but i can still be upset about it. i look in the mirror and i try to suck my stomach in and pretend nothing changed but its not the same. i see old pictures of myself, especially that bikini pic. ironically, i captioned it “i will never have the confidence to take a bikini pic again”... and here we are. i look at the clothes i wore last year and remember how fucking good i felt wearing them. i try putting them back on and seeing my stomach bulging and my arms looking fat and my love handles, something i didn’t see last year. and i just take them off and opt to wear something frumpier that doesnt hug my figure.

i try to tell people about how i feel but i cant take those ‘love yourself and all your flaws’ campaigns seriously. i dont think i can listen to another ‘you have to just keep faking it until you make it and if u just tell urself ur beautiful u will feel beautiful!’

because if you’re me, you know you cant kid yourself. if you’re me you can’t ‘love every flaw’. you fixate on them. and you let them define you. and if youre me, flaws are all you see.

i hate myself for getting back to this point.

i have a very supportive boyfriend that knows about all this, who is trying to actively get me to go on runs with him. we are trying to go for walks more and be out and about. he reminds me of little things, like if we are getting bubbletea he will suggest i go with less sugar. he is trying, we are trying. and i appreciate him so much.

today i complained in my car about this to my boyfriend, again. for the millionth time. and he still was supportive. but i just feel like i cant keep doing this to him. he said something today, which i think was him trying to give me a reality check to show me that i cant just wish i could starve myself and overwork myself to lose weight and call it a day... but it stung. he said “i don’t want to be with someone that’s not healthy. i have standards too” and i realized then he deserves so much better than to fucking babysit my complaining ass. i am 24. and i shouldnt be putting this on him. he is an adult with problems just as real as mine and i shouldnt be burdening him with this anymore.

im scared to talk to him about how that comment made me feel, because he’s so right, and he has every right to leave me. i would honestly. the amount that i worry and fixate on all my flaws and complain and have crying breakdowns about this is not fucking normal. and it shouldnt be his problem. i just want him to be with someone that doesnt give him this baggage. he met me in my ‘prime’ days when i just started getting my skinny body last year. when we finally started dating, we were super sexually active. and i mean, having sex like 15 times a week. im not kidding. now we havent had sex in almost an entire month. i dont feel sexy anymore and its impacting my sex drive.. he tries to start it with me and i just can’t because i feel like he is probably repulsed by my body. this is a huge huge huge problem, seeing as sex was a huge part of our relationship (we are very emotionally in tune with one another, but sex was a great addon because we both love it so much). i hate the way i look without clothes on. i cant bring myself to do it because it makes me feel like shit about myself.

but we are moving in together next month. and that is a huge step. and i am worried that i will never change, and he’s going to feel like he’s stuck with me because he’s moving 40 minutes away from his hometown to live with me. i almost want us to break up so he can be with someone with less baggage but i also love him and i want to be better for him and for us.

someone please help me.

#help #lol

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lasercruz · 4 years

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@quarterdollar fuck you and im sorry that i took so long to answer and i hope that im mostly coherent because i am. very tired as im typing this

1: Full name Nicky Jackie Marie Cruz !!

2: Age 21

3: 3 Fears Mold, tall heights if I’m not secured (like, I’m not scared of rollercoaster heights but I’m scared of like, cliffs), and balloons esp balloon animals

4: 3 things I love I love so many things uhh hh h. Jjba, adventure zone, and my friendssss 💞

I know turn ons/offs aren’t inherently sexual but i never know what to say for them so im skipping them :0

7: My best friend you 🥺🥺

8: Sexual orientation bi

9: My best first date ive never really been on a actual date :0

10: How tall am I 5′3

11: What do I miss being with my friends physically and just watching stuff or goofing around on the floor 😭

12: What time were I born 11:02pm

13: Favourite color Dark blues

14: Do I have a crush yes shh

15: Favourite quote there so much sappy quotes that are on uquizzes a lot that i like a lot the first that comes to mind is “ You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you.” and so on and also “if i loved you less i might be able to talk about it more”

16: Favourite place As far as just physically and not like people or other stuff that comes with with a place, I miss VT campus a lot tbh more than I thought I would. To pick a more specific place, the gazebo at the duck pond cause its where I’d go if I wanted to be alone or like if my roommate was sleeping or working and i didnt want to worry about being quite and it was always super peaceful

17: Favourite food I dont really have One favorite food it just depends what I’m in the mood for but my go to answer for favorite food category wise is either chinese or seafood

18: Do I use sarcasm Depends who I’m with ?? Generally no not often but if im close with someone and just goofin yeah

19: What am I listening to right now My love song playlist. its my go to thing to listen to cause my playlist with all my music has so much on it that i end up skipping half the songs until i find something im in the mood for and this one has a lot less that i end up skipping. the current song its on is day without you by keep for cheap

20: First thing I notice in new person It depends on the person like if they have something that stands out about them, thats what I tend to notice but like. How they carry themself i guess ? cause i feel like thats a easy way to get a read on somebody before talking to them

21: Shoe size 5 mens / 7 womans

22: Eye color Brown

23: Hair color Naturally dark brown but currently dyed black with rainbow bangs

24: Favourite style of clothing this question is on so many ask games and quizzes and I never know how to answer it cause i feel like i dont really have one specific style,, I like colorful and fun stuff i guess ?

25: Ever done a prank call? No and if you prank call a place of business youre annoying. i used to answer phones at work and we didn’t get them super often but GOD i hate prank callers

27: Meaning behind my URL emu is an old nickname and what i mainly went by until i settled on Nicky and this. is my blog.

28: Favourite movie Baby driver !!

29: Favourite song my go to answer for this is community gardens by the scary jokes

30: Favourite band THE SCARY JOKES

31: How I feel right now sleeby,,,,

32: Someone I love i love , my friendz ,, 🥺🥰

33: My current relationship status single ✌️

34: My relationship with my parents im close to my mom but i dont really get along with my dad ,

35: Favourite holiday Christmas !

36: Tattoos and piercing i have no tattoos, 3 piercings in each ear (2 on each earlobe and 1 on the top on each side)

37: Tattoos and piercing i want I want a interrobang on my wrist and an Aquarius symbol on my ankle and MAYBE the joestar birthmark, i wouldn’t mind more ear piercings and i want a septum piercing but ive seen videos of them getting done and they make me squirm i dont know if id go through with it

38: The reason I joined Tumblr sdklgkjgh i had a my little pony roleplay blog before i made my personal account

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? no we’re good friends !!

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? no not regularly at least

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? no

42: When did I last hold hands? my mom tried to hold my hand when i was half asleep on the couch the other day but like i was so out of it so like it was more our fingers together and the rest of my hand just loosely dangling so if that doesnt count, you

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? i give myself about 2 hours if im doing full makeup but thats purposefully longer than i need so i dont have to worry about rushing and i can relax and take my time

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? no i only shave them if they’re gonna be showing or if the Urge to be Smooth comes over me

45: Where am I right now? my room at home on my bed

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? probably Kaylie cause she doesn’t drink and i assume if im drunk with other friends there she’d be the only sober one

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? Reasonable, if i have it too loud i cant think so the only time i have my music loud is if im doing nothing and want to Not Think

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? Ye

49: Am I excited for anything? short term im excited for the ai crushes all banks stream tonight and long term im excited to move into our apartment

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? no im not a tell everything to someone type of person .

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? i smile most of the time like, at work (before we wore masks) id always be smiling to look nice and like. just in general if i want to Not Look Unhappy or whatever

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? my mom probably like, yesterday

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? ive never kissed any1 .

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? nope i don’t think i really trust easily so like this doesnt rlly happen,

55: What is something I disliked about today? i woke up late cause i was up late last night so ive been tired all day I dont like the feeling

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? language barriers aside itd be super cool to meet hirohiko araki

57: What do I think about most? Whatever media im currently most into so right now adventure zone and magnus archives

58: What’s my strangest talent? umm i dunno im kinda flexable i guess ? not like ~contortionist~ level but like enough that i can freak people out sometimes

59: Do I have any strange phobias? i mentioned balloons as a fear in an eariler question so yeah that but im a lot better about it than i used to be

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? in front tbh

61: What was the last lie I told? i was on phones for the last hour and a half of my shift on friday and like. when people call and ask if an item is in stock and i can’t confirm it i, just tell them its not. like, someone asked if we had a specific kayak and i usually just search the walmart app or run over to where itd be to check but the kayaks are to far for me to run to and the app said limited stock which usually means little to none so , i just put it on hold for a bit then tell him we’re out.

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? i like video chatting in theory cause its nice to see people visibly react to stuff but i tend to get too self conscious about how i look so i just do audio only

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes to both !! i am both

64: Do I believe in magic? yes in some ways i suppose

65: Do I believe in luck? yes im v superstitious

66: What’s the weather like right now? its a pretty good day its sunny but not too hot :oo

67: What was the last book I’ve read? its been ages since i last read a book in full 😔 i honestly dont knwo what the last one would of been 😔 😔

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? yes !!! love it

69: Do I have any nicknames? not anything i get consistently called no

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? ive never gotten super hurt that i can think of ??

71: Do I spend money or save it? save it

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge? no

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me? doppio bean plush ,,,,

74: Favourite animal? hedgehogs!!!!

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? on my phone probably on tiktok or something waiting for jojo to come on toonami

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? I? dont think he has one i guess ??

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? butterflies by samsa but it makes me happy in the “im crying now” kinda way itss cute

78: How can you win my heart? just by being nice and respectful tbh ,

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? idk i dont really want anything fancy just my name (chosen name please god im so scared of dying and geting my birth name on my tombstone if that happens i WILL come back as a vengeful ghost) and my birth and death dates

80: What is my favorite word? saccharine

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr by my tumblr crushes (which its been YEARS since i looked at) ; frostios, 27names4tears, smollpurrito, happynaru, and warpedlamp

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? if we being real id just get so scared dsjkfsldjglg theres so much i could say i dont know :((

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? not ? that i know of

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? why are all the questions worded super basic except this one skdlskdjfj. Shape shifting

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? i can really think of anything really as long as a friend is asking i tend to answer truthfully ?

86: What is my current desktop picture? Sobble BUT this reminded me that i wanted to change it to a xenoblade pic so its this now :

90: Failed a class? no

91: Kissed a boy? no

92: Kissed a girl? no

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no but oh god just thinking about that im 🥺🥺🥺🥺 id die id melt 🥺🥺

94: Had job? ye i was a cashier for a year in highschool and then i work in wamlart apparel in the summers

95: Left the house without my wallet? not when I know ill need it no, but ive left it home if im just going to a friend or family member’s house or i have my mom’s card or some cash in my pocket

96: Bullied someone on the internet? no !!

98: Played on a sports team? no lmao i dont do sports

99: Smoked weed? no

100: Did drugs? i had a weed brownie like once but it was such a small piece i didnt really feel anything

101: Smoked cigarettes? no

102: Drank alcohol? Ye

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? not currently i was vegan for a little bit to encourage a friend that was doing it though

104: Been overweight? no

105: Been underweight? no

106: Been to a wedding? yes three, my grandma’s when she got remarried, and both my brothers

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? probably yes lmao often

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? not TV TV but if netflix and the like count then yes

109: Been outside my home country? no :(

110: Gotten my heart broken? not ? really no

111: Been to a professional sports game? ive been to a handful of Yankee games

112: Broken a bone? no

114: Been to prom? yes i went to my highschool’s and a friend’s highschool’s my senior year

115: Been in airplane? no

116: Fly by helicopter? no

117: What concerts have I been to? none :((((

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? ye

119: Learned another language? i took 3 years of Spanish in high school but i wasn’t any good at it and dont really remember much of what i did learn

120: Wore make up? yes i do often :0

123: Dyed my hair? ye a lot

124: Voted in a presidential election? yes ever since iv been old enough to i vote

125: Rode in an ambulance? no

126: Had a surgery? dental surgery yes

127: Met someone famous? Not anyone i’d count no

128: Stalked someone on a social network? depends on what you count as stalking i guess but like not ever in a creepy way like ive been on people’s social media to find out stuff about them like. if theyre in a relationship or especially after highschool ill wonder about someone i havent talked to in awhile and ill see what theyve been up to and what theyre doing with their life and stuff

129: Peed outside? no

130: Been fishing? yes like once

131: Helped with charity? donation wise yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? ive never confessed to anyone and been rejected but once a friend told my crush i liked them and they confronted me about it and rejected me but it made me more mad at the friend that told them than it made me sad about being rejected because i knew it’d probably go like that and it justmade thing awkward between us for awhile 😔

133: Broken a mirror? ive broken the little mirrors inside eyeshadow pallets but i havent broken full ones

134: What do I want for birthday? usually just money lol or something thoughtful and cute

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? i aggresivly do NOT want kids BUT hypohetically Elliot or Xander for a boy and idk what i’d nam a girl

136: Was I named after anyone? no

137: Do I like my handwriting? its messy so no not really but if im writing something for myself like a not or whatever i dont mind as long as i can read it

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? even as a little kid i always played computer games but other than that, this guy :

139: Favourite Tv Show? Jojo

140: Where do I want to live when older? New york or japan

141: Play any musical instrument? i can kind of play harmonica

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? i burnt my thumb kinda bad on the oven a while ago its still kinda healing but right now it looks like its gonna stay a scar

143: Favourite pizza toping? i like everything/suprieme pizza but if i have to pick one single topping pepperoni

144: Am I afraid of the dark? yes :((

145: Am I afraid of heights? mentioned it earlier but yes if im not strapped in or secured etc

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? no im so scared of being caught doing something bad that i just. dont

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? i mean yes but thats life babey

149: What my greatest achievments are ive gotten awards for grades and stuff but that boring BUT i got the english department award or whatever that was called im very proud of that

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery i donate some and save the rest tbh

152: What do I like about myself i can be pretty sometimes 👉👈 im cute or whateva ,,,

153: My closest Tumblr friend i dont really havent “tumblr friends” aside from friends i know irl and also tey have tumblrs ,,

154: Something I fantasise about just. growing up and having my own place maybe with someone and. being comfortable and okay and not having to worry ,,

155: Any question you’d like? dkfjhdskhf japan :000

#ask #mine

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bum-callout · 6 years

Text

the full regan tea!

i know this is long as HELL so there will be a tl;dr at the end for those who dont have the time to read it or just dont want to.

disclaimer 1: screenshots will be added to this as theyre located. a lot of this persons accounts/messages have been deleted, so some are hard to find, unfortunately.

disclaimer 2: no witch-hunting of this individual is encouraged. this is merely a warning to people who interact with them and something to document and fully address their lies over the past three or so years.

a little context:

this callout regards an individual who will be referred to as “regan” and they/them for the duration of this post to avoid confusion. a list of their known aliases is located here.

they currently go by alayne, and are most active on quotev, where their most recent urls are @jonestxwn (which is super disrespectful already lol) and @yearzer0. their old tumblr is @colacans, but if they have a new one, im unaware of it.

all victims names have been changed to preserve their privacy. here is a list of people mentioned:

gail: gail refers to the main victim of regans manipulation and their partner of several years. they started dating some time in 2015 or 2016. the broken heart emoji in some screenshots refers to gail. gails alters are also changed to “gail” for privacys sake.

jake: jake is another victim of regans, albeit a more minor one. jake met regan in 2015 and started dating them. jake is also often lied about as regan. the game controller emoji in some screenshots refers to jake.

skylar: ex-qpp/partner of regans. last testimonial is from them.

taylor: an ex friend of regans who theyd had various and sundry drama with over the 3 years of bs.

jay: an ex of regans that they parted on rough terms with.

any other censored names: people who i was sure would only be mentioned once.

gail and jake:

this is, without a doubt, the most important part of the callout, and unfortunately the part with the least viable screenshots, due to deletion of accounts/messages. gail has since deleted most of her messages from regan, but the ones that ive found/been given screenshots of are here (with gails explicit permission).

gail:

regan was incredibly shitty to gail during their 2-3 year relationship. i would go so far as to say regan was abusive. as will be seen in the actuallydivine section, regan blames a great deal of things on gail, and has never permanently taken the blame for anything in their rocky relationship; it has always, according to regan, been something wrong with gail.

here are some examples of regan exhibiting abusive behaviour (tormenting gail because its “funny”), admitting to their own shitty behaviour, and mentioning cheating on her. its interesting to note they were also dating jake at this time, but they cared about him so little they didnt even mention the effect cheating might have on him.

i find it interesting that regan admits to being shitty towards gail as far back as 2016, but has gone back to claiming they did nothing and that gail is the one at fault. perhaps it is a bit far to claim that regan is a pathological liar, but with their behaviour, i would not be entirely surprised.

another thing to mention regarding gail is that regan claimed gail pushed them into the habit of regan calling gail “daddy,” and then saying they were ace and it made them uncomfortable in the first place, when nothing could be farther from the truth. regan has publicly in front of their followers, almost 100% of whom were minors, talked about their R*PE KINK, and often called gail daddy unprompted on the feed and elsewhere. before anyone comes for me, im not claiming that they couldnt be asexual, but i am doubtful because of the fact theyve claimed that once or twice before and decided they werent, AND because of the fact they only used it to pin the blame on gail for this.

this doesnt even touch on the amount of times they threatened to kill themself.

jake:

regan and jakes relationship went as such: they met in 2015, when jake was 13 and regan was 16, and started dating. hopefully you can understand what is wrong with that, as a relationship with that age gap is ILLEGAL in every u.s. state. there was sexual conduct involved, making regan (arguably) a child predator. there is also a statement that regan dated another 13 year old when they were 17, but that is as yet unproven and the 13 year old in question is not contactable to confirm this. to the best of my knowledge, both of their current partners are also minors, despite the fact they are 19 as of october 2018.

regan was also extremely shitty to jake during this time, constantly “bullying” him (their own words) in a way that they found funny, but was clearly extremely upsetting to jake. they also pushed him aside for at least half of their relationship, as they were poly and their other partners (mostly gail) were more their focus.

above is a conversation between jake and regan. regan came to him and asked him “what [they] ever did to [him]” and after respondingg and explaining why exactly he had beef with them, he discovered that them saying they wanted “no drama” was absolutely bs, as they had been posting a psa trying to get he and gail deleted for no reason that same day. afterwards, regan messaged jake asking for a truce, which jake refused, as he was furious with them and felt that they were not in a position to ask for a truce when they were doing things like this just hours before.

misc:

this is mostly just them talking shit, but some of the stuff they say is clearly lies if you consider evidence. they constantly paint themself as the victim when they are a 19 year old abuser who takes advantage of people regularly.

(this last screenshot refers to jake changing his username to a pun based on the phrase “lies and slander”; its unclear whether regan sent this pretending to be someone else, or had someone they know send it.)

i think its also interesting to note that this screenshot and later ones where regan is friends with jake are taken merely a month apart, and then, two months later, theyre back on their bs. something about that seems super fake to me.

actuallydivine:

regardless of your opinion on actuallydivine, if you look at the lies section, you can see regan blaming gail for all their actuallydivine stuff and saying it was all a lie. yeah. bs.

mental illness:

i know this is a bit of a controversial subject, but a lot of stuff regan said/did concerning mental illness (ESPECIALLY involving their system/alters) was really shitty imo.

this is a good example of something shitty they did alter-wise. this was something they claimed OVER AND OVER AGAIN, saying shitty things they did were always their evil headmates, and constantly killing off and creating new headmates (that were mostly actually just them under a new name) as an excuse for their behaviour and a way to reset for being a shitty person.

heres them listing their mental illnesses. now, if you look in the lies section, regan says they faked their headmates (aka their osdd), so thats more proof theyre a liar. they also at one point bashed self-diagnosis, and yet they admit to self-diagnosing here. Hmm. something else to note is that in the first image, they seem to be claiming that their therapist diagnosed them, when diagnoses are made by psychiatrists, but that could be a simple oversight on their part.

lies:

self-explanatory, but this section is mostly regan saying or implying theyve changed and are now a better person.

as you can see in the above screenshots, all taken at different times in the last two years, theyve done this thing over and over and OVER where they claim theyve changed, theyre better, something has changed their view, and that is simply not the case, and never has been.

this last one is from this month (october 2018). sound familiar?

these arent so much blatant lies as it is implying theyre any different now. also, funny to acknowledge that 2015 them was a piece of shit, when they really dont act any different now.

some other ridiculous things they lied about:

their height, at least three separate times.

their zodiac sign.

killers:

regan is very much a ‘true crime’ kind of person, and i do, in some aspects, mean the fetishize-y kind. theyre borderline obsessed with serial killers, and have expressed sexual attraction for ted bundy. however, thats not the only true crime-related bullshit theyve pulled.

yeah. regans factkin with JIM JONES. and they made one of their urls “jonestxwn” like.. how disrespectful can you be? if they were a columbiner, i would not be surprised. for those who are not aware, jim jones is the cult leader who caused the jonestown massacre, which resulted in the death of 900+ people through mass suicide. its where the phrase “drinking the koolaid” comes from, as the poison was mixed with a koolaid-like product.

miscellaneous:

you thought regan could not be any more of a freak? you were wrong baybee!

even without context this is a gross thing to do. however, context makes this worse: the individual in question, while they were NOT a good person, was around jakes age, if not younger, meaning that they were at least 3 years younger than regan at the time, and were most likely probably 13-14, judging by the time period when regan was interacting with them, so regan was 3-4 years older than this individual when they manipulated and fake dated them.

just gross. its of note that regan turned 18 in 2017, so they were an adult or close to being an adult when they said this.

hmm. kind of fetishize-y, but not the worst thing ive seen from regan.

GROSS? stay away from children.

honestly this ones just funny all things considered.

this isnt the only time theyve referred to themself as a fujoshi, and some of those times were when they identified as female. yikes!

yet another one thats just funny. they are genuinely a narcissist, and regularly refer to themself as some kind of genius (not to mention their god complex, which THEY THEMSELF refer to as such).

another one like that mentioning their headmates and the fact they are, and i quote, “the smartest person alive.” come bless us mortals with your 300 iq, o god regan.

OK MR KING OF EVIL LMFAO.

they were also into ddlg but i have no screenshots of that, as after a certain period, they prefaced a lot of their posts with stuff like “hehe im not into ddlg but i sure love calling my partner daddy!” despite having said, and i quote, “ddlg is my main kink,” at one point.

another point against them, which i have proof for but didnt feel was relevant enough to this: they love tearzah, and claimed to have been in a relationship with them. although tearzah (and melanie martinez... AND reinagoth) are people who they are a massive hypocrite about, as they acknowledged they were shitty and refused to support them, and then, mere months later, decided “nevermind, dont care, i love them xoxo.”

testimonials:

this is fairly self-explanatory; its testimonials by anonymous people who interacted with regan in the past detailing what they know of them.

to add some extra context to the one directly above, this individual is younger than jake by a year.

more of these will be added as i receive more.

conclusion:

i apologize for getting kind of unprofessional at the end, but this is a subject im emotionally involved in. again, i DONT advocate witch-hunting of this individual. theyre a shitty person but harassing them will do nothing constructive.

spreading this would be appreciated, though, as this person is genuinely a danger to those around them and has continued to lie about gail and jake up until extremely recently, if they are not still doing so.

tl;dr:

regan is an abusive person who takes advantage of minors, blames the people they abuse, and constantly lies about everything they can, among a plethora of other shitty-but-less-unforgivable things.

#regan

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mageofpencils · 7 years

Text

get to know me (against your will)

Get to know me tag!!! Tagged by @drsupermonk thanks dude bro! i think some of the questions are missing but its chill, hopefully this isnt too annoying for everyone lol Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people I tag… @cryptidkohai @kingbokuroo @sugamamma @queeraesthete @flowerblxxd @itze its okay if like, none of yall do this lol THE LAST:   1. Drink: waterr   2. Phone call: to a coworker about picking up her shift  3. Text message: “im sorry bro" i feel like this text really says a lot about me lol  4. Song you listened to: best friend by rex orange county  5. Time you cried: mmm few weeks ago? ive cried a lot this summer,, HAVE YOU:   6. Dated someone twice: noo  7. Kissed someone and regretted it: yes lmao  8. Been cheated on: better not have  9. Lost someone special: not really tbh, i dropped a lot of people bc i learned they werent as cool as i originally thought tho  10. Been depressed: hA. YEAH   11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: *punk rock voice* IM TOTALLY STRAIGHT EDGE BRO. I DONT DO THAT SHIZ. FRICK DRUGS AND ALCOHOL. STAY IN SCHOOOOOOL  LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:   12-14: dark red, black aaand blue of any shade IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:  15. Made new friends: hEck yEAH 16. Fallen out of love: don’t really think ive ever been in love tbh? 17. Laughed until you cried: all the time lol 18. Found out someone was talking about you: did you mean: 6-7th grade and my sophomore year of high school :) 19. Met someone who changed you: ive met a lot of people who really opened up my perspective and shown me new ways to look like at life so i guess? 20. Found out who your friends are: i mean ive got a few that i hold super close 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: nah, fb is basically dead lol GENERAL:  22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: havent used it since 6th grade so no 23. Do you have any pets: a sweet (annoying) pupper 24. Do you want to change your name: mm yeah itd be fun 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: hung out w my parents bc i didn’t really have any friends at that point in time 28. Name something you can’t wait for: oh geez ummm just going on trips to visit my ld friends,, 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: 2 minutes ago 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: my bod type tbh. maybe id boost my confidence or my way of thinking about myself too 31. What are you listening to right now: absolute silence of everyone sleeping 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i dont think i have??? never even met a tom before. all toms are now a conspiracy 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: me. 34. Most visited website: tumblr, insta and youtube 35. Mole/s: none 36. Mark/s: i have a tiiiiny scar on my palm, one scar on my leg from when i got burned on a motorcycle and i think i have a birthmark on my foot that or its just discolored skin 37. Childhood dream: to be a painter in paris 38. Hair color: reddish brown, really faded 39. Long or short hair: i like short hair on myself but other than that, idc 40. Do you have a crush on someone: potentially??? (lmao no one is going to get an answer from me. only 2 people are aware of this and it will stay that way) 41. What do you like about yourself: im loyal af 42. Piercings: 1 cartilage and 2 others on both my ears 43. Blood type: o positive 44. Nickname: not really. i mean i go by rei or reagan so like. rei could be considered a nickname 45. Relationship status: lonely and pathetic 46. Zodiac: virghoe 47. Pronouns: they/them 48. Favorite TV Show(s): bnha and its always sunny in philadelphia 49. Tattoo(s): a future possibility 50. Right or left hand: righty 51. Surgery: wisdom teeth removeddd 52. Hair dyed in different color: variations of red, theres been blue and kinda blonde 53. Sport: my main is basketball and taekwondo (i miss it hhh), but ive done volleyball, softball, soccer and gymnastics 55. Vacation: germany, uk, japan and a few places in us 56. Pair of trainers: ?? MORE GENERAL:  57. Eating: currently, no. do i eat regularly? well my habits arent good lol 59. I’m about to: finish drivers ed 61. Waiting for: lots of stuff 62. Want: love, affection and support™ also happiness 63. Get married: ye boi 64. Career: civil engineer  WHICH IS BETTER  65. Hugs or kisses: mm both but hugs are super nice  66. Lips or eyes: hh both. mostly eyes tho 67. Shorter or taller: dont care lol 68. Older or younger: relatively the same age tbh. as for myself, im ur typical punk teen. rebellious and doesnt give a heck B) 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms 👀 71. Sensitive or loud: depends tbh. i need someone to counter balance w me so i guess loud?  72. Hook up or relationship: relationshippp 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant, lets not add to my anxiety  HAVE YOU EVER:  74. Kissed a Stranger: never 75. Drank hard liquor: too pure and wholesome for that 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: so many times 77. Turned someone down: yup 78. Sex on the first date: n e v e r 79. Broken someone’s heart: probably not. maybe 80. Had your heart broken: nope. 81. Been arrested: p u r e. and. w h o l e s o m e 82. Cried when someone died: i cry over fictional characters all the time 83. Fallen for a friend: HAHAHAHAHAHA yeah.  DO YOU BELIEVE IN:  84. Yourself: not at all !!!! 85. Miracles: sure why not 86. Love at first sight: not particularly 87. Santa Claus: nah. used to. 88. Kiss on the first date: nope nope nope OTHER:  90. Current best friend’s name: sarina <3 91. Eye color: blue 92. Favorite movie: about time, donnie darko and gentlemen broncos

#admin talks #sorry for the mess on these #tumblr is a dick

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queerberrie · 7 years

Note

Even numbers for the ask thing!

2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant? My ex, her name was Katie, and I would say it was, I don’t remember what situation it was in exactly, I was really struggling with being out of it during that time.4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week? Last name my siblings and cousin and I were playing uno and sitting and laughing our butts off!6. What is your favorite season? Why? Autumn, I love it for the temperature, the smells, the start of a new school year, and halloween8. What color are your nails? black!10. What is something you find romantic? when someone takes the time to remember a small detail or just cuddling wrapped under a blanket12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad? there’s a million for both of those options, but one thing that makes me happy would be sitting at my grandmothers with a cuppa, and one thing that makes me sad would be seeing people be cruel to others14. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library? the forest for sure!16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be? I wish I would be sitting outside a peacevalley park in the sun reading a book18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now? Her intelligence and confidence20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what? hmmm, this is tricky, i tend to hold onto memories from people i used to be close with and no longer speak to and it haunts me, so i guess i need to let go of the past22. Have you recently made any big decisions? yes, actually i came out to my parents which was spooky! 24. What movie would you use to describe your life? i don’t really have an answer to this, but if i could choose a movie it would be howls moving castle26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…” happiness28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex? generally their lack of knowledge on what women are really like, and often their lack of understanding and being emotional30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it? that im unsure ill ever be successful or find someone to love32. Have you ever been in love? i believe i have, but only once34. Why did your last relationship end? I wasn’t into her anymore, and we had different maturities and i was over it36. When was the last time you cried and why? yesterday or the day before while watching the handmaid’s tale38. What did you receive last Valentines Day? A sunflower, and chocolate strawberries!40. Have you ever been cheated on? no i don’t believe so!42. Ever had detention? no!44. What do people call you? Will, Willabee, pillow, bubba46. How big of a nerd/dork are you? hmm, i’d say im more of a weeb but a definitely big nerd48. How tall are you? 5′6.550. Favorite fruits? bananas, strawberries, peaches, watermelon, pumpkin, mango, so many!!52. What’s your earliest memory? my first birthday actually, i remember a pair of hands setting a chocolate cake with white icing in a metal pan in front of me, and it was my grandfather!54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? behind!56. Do you save money or spend it? i used to save it, and i’ve been spending it a lot so i gotta start saving again58. What top 5 things make you the angriest? 1.ignorance 2.stubborness 3. lying 4. being unnecassarily cruel 5. people who judge others60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? it really depends, if i have a way to get another job, i’d help if i have nothing and am already really struggling i’d try to call someone to help and unfortunately keep going62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. that creepy cartoon of the heart from adventure time64. Do you like the beach? yes, but i’d like to experience it in the fall or winter66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it! noel68. Describe your hair. right now its above shoulder length, with an undercut, slightly dyed purple still and super curly70. What is your ideal partner like? this is hard, esp. since i’ve romanticised this for yeares, but someone i truly feel comfortable being around, someone i can talk with that we can be both silly and have deep conversations and is similar in maturity to me, someone i can be silent for hours, or stay up till 3 am talking, just someone like me and i don’t need a “tumblr relationship” just someone to be happy72. Do you want to have kids? unknown, but probably not74. Are you Chunky or Slim? medium to chunky76. What would you change about your life? maybe not doubt myself as much78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?hopefully my sweet college friends or jaimee80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? yes, my sweet friends bri, sean, bridget, claire and jaimee82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? it would really depend, we aren’t really on good terms, but if she needed somewhere to go ofc84. Do you like bubble baths? YES86. Have you ever danced in the rain? oh god yes88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning? what did matt send me, it’s too early to move, why am i already tired again90. How was your day today? so far good, i’ve been watching a program with my sister and grandma and had brunch of sorts and read92. Describe the what you think of the ocean. i love the smell of salt and the sun covering ur skin in a warm embrace and the continuous pound of the ocean, but ive also had plenty of scary dreams of the ocean being too big and taking over people and ruining towns, so i believe it is a beautiful part of nature but also a force to be cautious around94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be? hmmm, im unsure96. When are you vulnerable? all the time, but especially at night98. Do you like to go hiking? yes yes yes!100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities? no,no,no,no,no,no,and no. heights scare me lmao.

thanks for the asks! I had fun thinking about answers

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entergamingxp · 4 years

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DualShockers’ Favorite Games of 2019 — Iyane’s Top 10

December 31, 2019 12:00 PM EST

2019 had a lot of cool mecha related games, but a lot of other great games from other genres too. Here are my top 10 from this year.

As 2019 comes to a close, DualShockers and our staff are reflecting on this year’s batch of games and what were their personal highlights within the last year. Unlike the official Game of the Year 2019 awards for DualShockers, there are little-to-no-rules on our individual Top 10 posts. For instance, any game — not just 2019 releases — can be considered.

I assume anyone who clicked on this wishes to read me talking about myself and my Unneeded Opinions (one of my favorite sentences of 2019), so I’ll do just that. 2019 was another year that went by in a flash. I’ve reached my first anniversary writing on DualShockers in September, and I’ve been pretty busy overall. As such, there are multiple games on this list I actually didn’t finish yet.

There are many games released in 2019 that I was really hyped about but didn’t have the time to try out yet either, and I’d like to start by listing some of them:

We first have games I’d consider mainstream, such as Devil May Cry 5, Judgment (I actually bought it in Japanese) Astral Chain. Then you’ve got more niche things, like Daemon X Machina (I’m waiting just in case a PC port gets announced), the Grandia remasters, SaGa Scarlet Grace, and Friends of Mineral Town Remake.

Lastly, we’ve got some visual novel games: Berubara Gakuen, Gnosia (Japanese outlets hyped up this game in a similar fashion that what happened with Disco Elysium in the US and Europe), Ciconia Phase 1 (the thing I was actually hyped for the most in 2019), Eve Rebirth Terror (idem), and the Yu-No remake.

I’m on a quest to play everything that Hiroyuki Kanno wrote after getting my mind blown by Eve Burst Error. Yu-No is one of these things, but the character design in the remake is bland as hell. Ryou Nagi is a great artist, and you can see that with Heavy Object or Ar Tonelico, but for some reason, everything remake-related he touches turn into the blandest thing ever. The same thing happened for the newest Langrisser I&II remake; it’s like some huge conspiracy. As such, I’ll probably grab the Yu-No remake in Japanese, as that version includes a port of the original.

Anyway, that was just a small intro to show my tastes and what to expect in this ranking. Here are the games I’ve enjoyed the most in 2019, and note that it’s not only games released in 2019. Also, note that the top 5 are all pretty much my top 1.

10. Cyber Troopers Virtual-On Masterpiece 1995-2001

I suck at Virtual-On. But I love it, especially Oratorio Tangram, and being able to play it remastered on PS4 is nice. The only thing these ports of the three Virtual-On games sadly lack is local multiplayer split-screen. Virtual-On is the originator of Gundam Vs like games and all the anime 3D arena battlers of varying quality releasing each year, and it’s the best one there is.

Other games I considered for this position were Destiny Connect, Shenmue 3 (which I didn’t play myself and watched an online friend’s playthrough), and Zanki Zero (I was supposed to review that but ended up never finding the time to finish said review). I picked Virtual-On because it didn’t require me to write 2000 words to explain my mixed feelings about it.

9. Space Engineers

According to Steam, I’ve played 47 hours of Space Engineers with my online friends. I’m pretty sure at least 20 hours of that was us trying to figure out how the game works and being annoyed and how counter-intuitive many elements are. This includes reading wikis and only to realize it’s outdated info, looking for Uranium only to realize you can’t find any on planets, or trying to design vehicles, copying blueprints and recreating them block by block. And a lot of other dumb stuff.

Besides all these frustrations, Space Engineers is my favorite multiplayer game I’ve tried out this year and I’ve made some great memories with it, as an online friend streamed some of our adventures too. I’ve tried making the Senegalese flag with wind turbines (too long to explain): we managed a trip to a moon and putting the Algerian flag on it (a French joke too long to explain) and we did a MASK opening sequence parody with a vehicle parade.

8. Ocarina of Time Randomizer Version 5.0

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I actually put this on my list last year as well, but seeing that the game’s meta has changed since then, this is fine. Again, I don’t have the time to play this myself and enjoy watching races instead, This year, ZeldaSpeedRuns held the OoT Randomizer Season 2 tournament, which ended in June with the victory of Marco against WTHH.

Now, the Season 3 tournament bracket matches just started in early December, with the version 5.0 0f the mod, changing the meta. We’ve already got a surprising upset, with first tournament winner and 2nd qualifier ATZ losing against 31 qualifier Killerapp23. Getting into detail would take too long and be incomprehensible if you’re not already into OoT rando, so I’m just gonna say this is the most interesting esports thing to watch ever. And like I said last year, it’s incredibly fun.

7. Wing Commander IV: The Price of Freedom

Wing Commander IV is one of the many games I’ve played in my childhood which left me with a huge impression. Along with things like Shenmue 1 & 2, this is one of the games I used to regularly quote until my high school years or so. I’ve finally got the time to rediscover the game this year. I didn’t end up replaying it myself though and watched a full playthrough of it. It was really interesting; I remembered many iconic scenes from the game and some characters, but I had no idea what the overall story was about anymore.

It’s surprising how anime space opera the story is, and I wouldn’t be surprised if something Japanese inspired the story. It all comes to Japan. This also made me realize, in a sense, that Wing Commander IV is pretty much one of the first visual novels I played and what made me enjoy well-written stories and choices. This is also what made me both love and hate draconian choices, multiple routes and characters’ deaths. I hate not being able to save characters.

6. Romancing SaGa 3 Remaster

Back in my childhood I tried playing Romancing SaGa 3, as it was among the various SNES roms I had at disposal. I quickly realized that it’s completely different than most RPGs and unlike many games in Japanese such as Super Robot Wars 4: I couldn’t trial and error my way through.

Around 18 years later, Romancing SaGa 2 Remaster comes out in 2017; it’s awesome, and a masterpiece. And then in 2019, Romancing SaGa 3 Remaster is finally out and it’s even more awesome. I’m currently in the final area of the game after playing as Sarah, because she has a fluffy afro ponytail. I just wish the game had a turbo button.

Tie-in 6. Persona 5 Royal

This is a tie-in as that’s an enhanced version of a really recent game, which was my 2016 favorite. I purposely played through Persona 5 only once, only maxing the coops and not doing much of the other side content, in case such an enhanced version ever released.

Even then, and even considering how much of a masterpiece that Persona 5 is, clearing such a long game again is annoying. Most of the new scenes I’ve seen so far, most notably Kasumi’s and Takuto’s scenes, are all incredibly nice though. The renewed dungeons and bosses’ designs are fun, and Joker is even more Lupin The Third-like with the wire hook, but there’s nothing groundbreaking either. I’m far from reaching the new part at the original’s ending, as I’m just about to reach the Hawaii part. Hopefully, it’ll be a nice ride.

The five games below are all my actual number one.

5. 13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim

I’ve been waiting for 13 Sentinels since when it got announced in 2015. I could even say since 2013, as I hoped a game related to the Vanillaware Happy New Year 2013 Geroge Kamitani artwork above would come out someday. I had incredibly high expectations for it and none of it were betrayed as of now.

It’s awesome. It’s fully-voiced. It’s got giant robots. It’s the most beautiful (2D) game since forever. It’s like if an old Japanese adventure game got made with current technology. It’s a shame the game bombed in Japan. If you’re interested, I’ve written more about the game, and I’m recording myself translating the game as I’m playing through it.

4. Ys IX: Monstrum Nox

Ys IX: Monstrum Nox is amazing on all points. I’ve rarely had so much fun walking around and exploring a city in a game. I think what makes the game the most amazing is how it’s pretty much the culmination of the Ys series since it switched to the party system, and as if one of the first versions of the first Ys games were transposed to 3D. The verticality of the environments is used so well you can still feel lost despite having a map. Falcom might pretty much be one of the smallest, penniless studios in Japan despite its longevity; they still make the best action RPGs ever. What I’ve seen of the story so far is particularly amazing too, and Toshihiro Kondo is a good writer along with being a good company president.

I’m currently taking a break from the game after reaching what I guess is around 1/3 of it. I was so hyped I had to play it at launch, but I want to do all the other Ys games I didn’t do yet first, even if it’s absolutely not necessary to understand the story. I like being able to understand every single reference in a series like this. I’m the kind of person who wishes to know exactly how many times Kazuya and Heihachi threw each other out of a volcano/mountain.

3. Super Robot Wars T

I didn’t play Super Robot Wars V nor SRW X as they initially didn’t release on Switch. If we don’t count SRW OG Moon Dwellers, which was on my top ten 2018 list, SRW T is my first SRW game since the SRW Z3 finale on PS3 in April 2015. It’s pretty great, be it the story, its cast list, or the animations. Everything about it is nice. Having things like Cowboy Bebop, Gunbuster, Rayearth, Gun x Sword, and Captain Harlock together feels incredible. It’s extremely sad that Captain Harlock’s seiyuu Makio Inoue passed away right after he finally got in SRW.

A new OG anime directed by Obari and a new OG game would be nice. I’m happy the series seemingly won’t get a new game in 2020, so the development teams can take their time.

2. Fire Emblem Fuukasetsugetsu / Three Houses

This game has my favorite cast of characters in a Fire Emblem game, along with Fire Emblem Seisen no Keifu/Genealogy of the Holy War, and I could write a 1000 word article on every single character on this picture (if I was paid adequately for it). This is only one of the many reasons why I like this game. In a nutshell, I’d say I love the fact that I find it very innovative and yet similar to the other Fire Emblem games I’ve played and liked so far, and how it’s true for every aspect of the game.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Fire Emblem: Three Houses.

1. Project Sakura Wars/ Shin Sakura Taisen

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This opening sequence has over 1.7 million views, and half of these are all me. While I’m not done with Shin Sakura Taisen yet, I fail to imagine how the game could even disappoint me so far, seeing how amazing it is. Before the game launched, I wasn’t concerned about the battle system change, but whether the new cast would be interesting or not. If there was a world Guinness record for most baseless worry of 2019, this would get it. This game got everything that makes Sakura Taisen so awesome. The strong female characters, the cool mecha, the great worldbuilding, the comedy. It’s a great new start in the series and I hope we’ll get more. I shared a few impressions on the game and just like 13 Sentinels, I’m recording myself playing the game, translating at the same time.

That’s it for my top ten.

If you’re wondering about my expectations for 2020, the game I’m looking forward to the most so far is the Seiken Densetsu 3 remake: Trials of Mana. Then we also have things like FF7R, Rune Factory 5, Space Channel 5 VR, Brigandine…I’m also eager to see KOF XV even if I won’t play it. Lastly, 2020 will also mark the tenth anniversary of the Pretty Series franchise. The Pretty Rhythm anime seasons and its King of Prism sequels were my favorite anime of the decade, so I’m looking forward to what Avex and Takara Tomy have in store for the anniversary, and if we might get some games other than arcade games out of it.

I’m planning to stay on DualShockers and keep writing about Japanese games in the new year. I don’t have the time nor the paycheck to cover every single news as fast as possible, but I always try to bring to the table as much info as I can, along with relevant translations and observations. Hoping you’ll keep reading us in 2020.

Check out the rest of the DualShockers staff Top 10 lists and our official Game of the Year Awards:

December 23: DualShockers Game of the Year Awards 2019 December 25: Lou Contaldi, Editor-in-Chief // Logan Moore, Managing Editor December 26: Tomas Franzese, News Editor // Ryan Meitzler, Features Editor December 27: Mike Long, Community Manager // Scott White, Staff Writer December 28: Chris Compendio, Contributor // Mario Rivera, Video Manager // Kris Cornelisse, Staff Writer December 29: Scott Meaney, Community Director // Allisa James, Senior Staff Writer // Ben Bayliss, Senior Staff Writer December 30: Cameron Hawkins, Staff Writer // David Gill, Senior Staff Writer // Portia Lightfoot, Contributor December 31: Iyane Agossah, Senior Staff Writer // Michael Ruiz, Senior Staff Writer // Rachael Fiddis, Contributor January 1: Ricky Frech, Senior Staff Writer // Tanner Pierce, Staff Writer

December 31, 2019 12:00 PM EST

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2019/12/dualshockers-favorite-games-of-2019-iyanes-top-10/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=dualshockers-favorite-games-of-2019-iyanes-top-10

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