#j is for just kidding; im going to commit arson

[elpis-simps]

When life locks a door, burn it. That's how arson works.

[spoopyslayer]

My college experience isn’t what i expected ... the klance fics lied to me

[organic-guacamole]

episode 210 here we go

awww seb doing the intro

congratulations to milky white and her baby chocolate milk😌

seb is so funny

but seriously, clean up that milk fast or else it will smell so bad in there....

was that Lauryn just randomly doing cartwheels? idk any theatre kids irl but that seems like it's a common thing...

is it just me or has ms Jenn been getting more harsh to Ricky and Seb mainly-

like what did they do to her

no because I actually snorted with laughter at the "you came back" WHAT IS THAT VOICE-

AND THE MASK OMG

yeah so my throat hurts now

I'm dying over here

KOURTNEY'S FACE

SAME GIRL SAME

Ricky's fake death got the whole place in tears /s

he looks like an asthmatic walrus

Seb's on piano, I love

we all know if he was the beast we'd all actually be crying✋

ok but I listen to Julia's version of home on Spotify when I want to cry-

right so gimme a second

is Ricky scratching his face.....while he's dying?

"belle i-" *flop*

round of applause to Ashlyn for trying to make Ricky's earthworm seizure look less.... yknow

Kourtney's just dying there

WAIT IS THAT NATALIE

did she really just disappear for 9 episodes just to come back and stare dramatically into the camera

WAIT SCRATCH THAT SHES HERE TO MURDER ASHLYN AND RICKY

oh so Ricky's wearing a gay shirt now too

so that's the real reason why Rini broke up, see y'all next season when Gini and caswen become canon /j

wait that was a long intro scene-

what was that look Carlos-

TALK TO MY BOY OR ELSE

carlos' run is so funny to me

therapist Ashlyn to the rescue

"that is...super" son you good?

ms Jenn call Benjamin, he would willingly put his loved ones on a rocket and blast them into Venus for you....

maybe

"I don't want you kids to be disappointed" girl you do realise you're the one that's most invested in this?

"a smooth opening night" wasn't there just 1 show though-

like their opening night was closing night too

"I think I was Troy at one point" PLEASE THATS THE MOST ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF THE SEASON 1 FINALE

me Jenn looks like a serial killer during that clap and I'm lowkey scared for zacky

"I have notes"

oo if you're taking suggestions, lemme get my list

"mother is freaking out" uhhhhhh

right....'mother"

"is everyone sitting down?"

*looks around awkwardly*

*big red slowly sits*

"no..."

please seb was the only one sitting-

does that mean Carlos looked at Seb as soon as he walked in and assumed that everyone else was sitting too or am I a seblos clown🤡

"is this about the transformation"

WOW MAYBE OT IS RICKY

WOW HES A DETECTIVE FOR FIGURING THAT OUT SO QUICK🤩

YO WHY IS NATALIE HERE-

she just shows up when it's convenient? is she gonna be at the sleepover too?

Seb's heavy swallow after Carlos shouts at him makes me so sad

"I never learned how to lie but I figure if I keep my mouth closed, I can't tell the truth" *nods and smiles at Nini when she asks*

why are they casually standing up all over the pizza shop, just sit at a big table and talk instead of blocking passageways and blocking off at least 6 tables-

"how about I invite myself" WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS FEEL THE NEED TO INVITE THEMSELVES TO ASHLYN'S HOUSE-

YOU CAN ASK BUT JUST FORCE YOUR WAY IN?

so Cash Caswell has a bigger house than... Dennis Caswell.... who would've thought

ah yes there's the good old EJ 1.0

Nini: "boys vs girls"

Gina: *looks devastated and glances longingly at EJ*

way to be inconspicuous

"but north high should be" *cracks her knuckles in the most uncomfortable way*

good for Ashlyn for getting more confident though

oo bossy big red

"i get bossy around the power tools"

is that why Ashlyn was holding up the drill in episode 8 orrrr 🤠

oh

Lily, leave him alone please

she's literally not blinking, is that what makes her creepy?

the diss at big red and his face afterwards is priceless

isn't that similar to what Gina's mom said to her in season 1? hmmmm

but seriously please don't try to redeem lily, let us have a character to hate, or to love because they're evil.

not everyone's a good guy.

"im not liked here and I don't know what to do"

let antoine finish his salad and it'll fix everything

"hug emoji" *gags*

y'all realize Lily's literally 14?

why is she calling a 16/17 year old from another school for personal advice-

"he gets weird around tools"

I shouldn't be laughing so hard

"deja vu maybe?" awkward silence

I'm dying here I love EJ so so so so much

"where's seb"

*cuts to seb being held hostage hoping that they'd notice he's missing and go look for him*

"don't ask"

"oh ok"

"100% real faux fur" as you should queen

sponsored by target

Kourtney is singlehandedly saving the entire show.

Seb making finger guns make me happier than it should

why is this kinda making me want to have a co-ed sleepover with my non-existent theatre friends

YES YOU DO NEED TO TALK/SING TO SEB CARLOS THANK YOU FOR KNOWING THAT

wait what-

you haven't talked to him all WEEK-

Carlos are you stupid /hj

Benjamin is so adorable I can't

he turned around to come back for her instead of going home. you're "what do you want Jenn🙄X act isn't fooling anyone Benjamin 🙃

10101

1+4+16= 21st?

they placed 21st?

or do I just not remember how to convert to base ten

GIRL DON'T BE RUDE TO HIM, HE'S GONNA SAVE YALL

no ms Jenn, the kids are not eccentric 35 year olds.

aww sebby

is he thinking that Carlos is only with him cuz he's the only other openly gay guy at school-

son you are a perfect little bean don't put yourself down

yes they all ship portwell as they should.

they'll be throwing risotto at the wedding.

not the chocolates. stop there are no chocolates. please stop I'm dying.

Gina you don't have to explain yourself to her

it was a misunderstanding and it's in the past

why is Ashlyn still laughing-

exactly it wasn't a big deal please just move on Nini

Kourtney really be out here saving everything

WHY IS ASHLYN STILL LAUGHING

why do I feel like when Gina finally told Ash about it, she didn't think it was that funny but wanted to feel included in the inside joke so now she brings it up randomly to show that she's in on it....I totally don't do that...

"idk, the farmer type" oh son...

Ashlyn and big red are just spilling the secrets back and forth huh?

OOO EJ AND GINA SITTING IN A TREE K-I-S-S-I-

cmon guys don't look at me like that-

"she is the best" and "we're buddies" don't sound right together

"pretty boy" "sweet boy" best ways to describe EJ

I love him.

and aw he's scared of rejection so he'll hold back just to keep her happy and not awkward how sweet

is Ricky wondering if letting her go(literally his song from last episode) was the best thing he did for Nini because he doesn't feel like it now? hmmm this is getting good

why is everyone so invested in Kourtney and Howie's relationship

PACK UP THE LAZY RICKY THING

oh yes Benji, that's exactly what she's doing

she couldn't follow her dream or whatever so now she's using the kids to gain some of the success she craves. why else would she have that massive hsm poster with her name on it in huge letters in her office.

just casually grab his hand with both your hands and stare at him creepily 🥰

ship jennzzara y'all

the first bump was a missed opportunity to do the baymax "falalala" as a reference to the fact that they watched big hero six while committing arson✋

wait so big red and EJ just left Ricky in the basement and now Ricky invited Carlos when they're supposed to be at the stage?

help no Ricky looks like he's about to tell Carlos he likes him (I know it's about writing the song for seb but still, look at his body language and tell me it doesn't look like that)

Ricky is so mature about this, he really just wants Nini to be happy even though he's hurting-

baby you deserve love, maybe Nini isn't the one for you but don't say you don't deserve it

why does he keep adding bro to the end like he doesn't know how to address Carlos

PLEASE CARLOS HAVING TO ADDRESS THE BRO THING

"let's write a song when we have like 45 minutes to get to the place and help our friends possibly win $50000 at the show in 2 weeks"

"can you hit a high C?"

"that's like the bottom of my range"

why am I laughing

this is so cool to see friendship interactions that we don't normally get to see

Nini why are you being like this-

Gina did nothing wrong??

I saw that, EJ and Gina being the only ones going in the same direction👀

right so obviously Kourtney's waiting until after the menkies to get back with Howie just in case he really is just using her as a way in to east high... obviously... right?

CARLOS

OK ITS COMING GET READY YALL

Why is portwell so awkward all of a sudden

OMG EJ

OMG GINA SAY YES or not, do what you want.

the way she doubts that EJ would genuinely ask so she has to make sure it's not Ashlyn behind it

OH

THE "NOT THAT I KNOW OF"

LIKE WHAT GINA SAID TO JACK ABOUT EJ BEING HER BOYFRIEND

GUYS THEY'RE SOULMATES

I want risotto now please

THEY'RE SO SWEET AND ADORABLY AWKWARD ITS LIKEEK LITTLE KIDS

OOOOOOO what is this place that seblos is in, looks fancy....and secluded

oh wait no Ricky's just standing there

wait is it the bomb shelter

it looks so good what

HSKAGSJAGAJAGWISGSKAUASBWKSVAIWBAISBQKSHIQBWOABWOABDOQBZIQBAIAQBSIWBQISVQKSIANSGOQBSAISBKASBKWBAIABQOSBBSJAHAJAVAJSBAJHSKAHSJAHAJAJAAJAHHHHHHHH

@youranxiousnerd ARE YOU OK?

CUZ IM NOT OK

LOOK AT SEBBY'S FACE

LOOK AT HOW ADORABLE IT IS

THE LYRICS ARE KILLING ME

SEBLOS IS KILLING ME

I AM DEAD

PLEASE SEND HELP

I like to imagine that Frankie and Joe practiced this in their apartment and just had a blast with it.

or maybe that Frankie practiced in secret like what Joe did for the climb

OH THE SUITS

THATS WHERE THAT CLIP IN THE PROMO WAS FROM

AWWW SEBBY'S SO CUTE

HE'S A LITTLE MARSHMALLOW

they're still so awkward with the dance I cant

let's appreciate Frankie's voice though

this episode really was made just for the seblos and portwell stans and you gotta love it

BIG RED GET OUT

WHY DOES HE ALWAYS DO THIS

Seb's little "yeah" IS ADORABLE

you can't tell me that wouldn't have been the best time for them to say I love you....IF FREAKIN BIG RED WASN'T THERE

ok but wait Ricky needs more hugs like that, look at his face

the boy needs love

"bro" please don't let Ricky and Carlos go back to not talking because their friendship is amazing

EJ laughing at Ricky sounding like a cat coughing up a furball is so funny to me

RICKY'S FLOP GETS ME EVERYTIME

I knew it was too good to be true

ok so Ricky's dead, next in line please

this episode was so short but I love it so much. this is what I signed up for for season 2✋

[luminous-shifting-vibes]

actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

out of context of course, what do you take me for? a sane person?

"they made lightning mcqueen hot"

"inch resting"

"Nix: Cars (2006) several people are typing..."

"im evaporating"

"enjoy precipitation"

"tow mater is more attractive than lightning mcqueen/hj"

"lightning mcqueen looks like he would call me a slur"

"why did I come back to a discussion regarding the attractiveness of vehicles"

"lark is the braincell of shiftblr tbh"

"you all need some grass in your life"

"me over here simping for block men and now literal cars"

"didn't nick wilde commit fraud canonically"

"i have no strong opinions on whether or not nick wilde is attractive"

"I AM AROMANTIC AND I AM NOT IMMUNE TO NICK WILDE"

"I am bisexual and I. Am not into Nick Wilde based on a simple fact he looks like he will drink all my pepsi and call me names"

"What is shiftbkr but not a bunch of simps"

"cries in Bianca Monroe"

"listen i have a folder called gayass

it is mostly pictures of kyoka jiro and virgil sanders"

"Nick Wilde x Reader where he steals your car 📷 carjacker to lovers AU 📷"

"he says "mama i like to step on keyboard""

"MY MOM JUST WALKED IN AND I HAD TO TELL HER I WAS LOOKING AT LIGHTING MC QUEEN HUMAN FANART"

"crab walks away"

""Y/N..." Nick whispered into your ear. "Your car...is a Honda Civic, right?" You looked up at Nick with a baffled expression. "Nick, my beloved? Whatever are you talking about?" "Just asking..." He said as he let you out of his embrace. "Hey, wanna see a magic trick, babe?" Your eyes sparkled. "Really, Nick? Of course!" Nick smiled. "Ok, close your eyes!" You giggled and closed your eyes, waiting for Nick to tell you to open up. Instead, you heard the loud rumble of a car starting up, and you open your eyes. Nick has stolen your car, and he has driven off into the sunset..."

"did y'all know his name used to be canonically Montgomery--he changed it to lightning mcqueen to get rid of his past"

"That is my exit number"

"cars trauma arc"

"wait do y'all know about car jesus" "as if jesus wasn't a ford focus in the bible"

"oh yall do not want to know about the trauma in my cars dr lmao"

"Dewit tau style babey make Lightning McQueen outlive everyone and stalk their reincarnations"

"Do they baptize other cars in like gasoline then"

"there is a pope car in the cars universe which means car jesus died for cars sins"

"NOT THE BOOMER MEMES"

"-lays facedown on the floor while caramelldansen plays-"

"like im serious how many of you guys endorse me falling face down on my floor" (NOT THE SAME PERSON AS PREVIOUS QUOTE)

"I will be Tall and no one can stop me"

"is a soft floor?"

"stop I thought faceplant meant like a succulent in the shape of a face instead of falling onto your noggin for a solid 10 seconds"

"Touch some grass??? What about eating grass"

"what if for every employee of the month i just printed out really horrible boomer memes"

"what ab smoking grass /j"

"Can the grassdirt smoothie be a special in the cafe"

"PLEASE IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR REWRITINH THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE WHIKE SPEEDRUNINT MINECRAFT"

"you have to get good dirt from like the middle of a pennsylvanian forest for it to taste good though"

"I ate a four leaf clover as a kid cause i thought it would make me lucky"

"guys how do i see the mee6 leaderboard"

"I used to think i was half dragon and I ate plants out of sidewalk cracks"

"i think i punched someone"

"my parents told me to stop doing that so I looked at them and ate a flower"

"I ate grass when I was 9 bc I read warrior cats and thought I was a medicine cat ....................."

"bees are just spicy flies"

"I had a mental breakdown when I was three cause I didn’t know how to turn off a phone"

"My mom drank a bee once"

"when I was a baby I kinned ink sans."

"bro who here find the yellow hat man from curious george fine as heck 📷📷📷"

"mY LUNGSSSSSS"

"no one topping Him"

"I like em big"

"I think Moto Moto has no game like move over hunky boy I could beat you 1v1 Roblox Arsenal 📷📷📷"

"If you didnt have a crush on springtrap, jeff the killer, or Underfell/Gaster/Error sans don't talk to me /j"

"LOOK THEY'RE BOTH DILFS WITH ABS THAT WOULD FIGHT GOD"

"ZORO IS BANNED"

"Guys please help I found my old fnaf fanart from when I was 8 I'm in literal tears"

"OH NO BOT MY FIFTH GRADE HAMILTON PHASE"

"The worst attraction ive ever had has to be Sombra Overwatch"

"My family is like "save all ur art so I can sell it when you're famous" I literally could not sell this if I tried"

"screaming puppet"

"I just remembered Ive drawn overwatch/hamilton crossover fanart"

"my hermit crabs ate each other again"

"we're cannibals ????"

"having me here is a curse you have inflicted on yourselves and I for one am glad for it <3" "scitters around like a crab in anticipation"

"CARB DAY"

"WE NEED TO HAVE A WATCH OARTY"

"hey y'all ill be right back i have to throw away a crab carcass"

"if I watch cars I'm going to start laughing in the middle of it nonstop just because the word cars is funny and also cars are funny like how do you move silly little metal box with rubber circles"

"Lark asleep post catboy pitbul"

"Mwista Wowldwide! Nya!" "hermit crab 2: electric boogaloo"

"Is that why your name is chaos"

"manifest the crab power!!"

"cool dex fact: i can't read 📷"

"sighs adds to worship these entities list"

"with a knife <3"

"yeah and if he betrays me I could probably throw him across the atlantic ocean"

"give me his eyes"

"my good citizen i am a- wait no im nonbinary nvm"

"it worked on a fish idk what to tell you"

"what is gender??? Is that a board game?? If so can I be apples to apples that one's my favorite"

"CHUTES AND LADDERS"

"anyways actually my gender is Candyland"

"Oh god romes the destroyer of friendships/j"

"i am a simple gay i see math i run in the opposite direction survival instincts 101"

"math my beloathed"

"algebra makes me want to rip open a bag of swedish fish and swallow them whole"

"cackles in they're au characters and this will be very fun"

"pog !!!! me too ksajgks one of my drs is a sanders sides au"

"Is that bipper"

"tumblr sexyman"

"Good because he’ll fuck u up if u hurt a child"

"I want a wing-suit"

"looks like a bean would poison someone"

"my hermit crabs are cannibals what can i say"

"sonic the hedgehog kinnie"

"get yourself a man who is capable of the most ungodly actions but won't do them because of their morality owo"

"tell him he can steal my wallet"

"eyes"

"idk about y'all but I need blueberry sweet tea to live"

"y'know the red souls from soul eater i really want to eat those"

"but like only respectable crimes like stealing from elon musk"

"You can go cultbashing with he!"

"He acts like a flamboyant gay man, but if a flamboyant gay man was straight."

"Simp Satan 📷"

"definitely arson"

"They look like they enjoy lemon squares and other lemon desserts"

"Satan is all-powerful but he spends most of his time building honeymoon locations because he is convinced that the protag loves him"

"bc shes the reincarnation of his dead wife or something i guess"

annd here's a quote from our very own dream (@shiftingwastaken) that sums this post up:

"shiftblr but context makes it worse"

[soyeonna]

NUH UH I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE WHENEVER I SEE YOUR LITTLE MESSAGES OR YOUR REPOSTS I GIGGLE LIKE A LITTLE KID AND ITS SO SO SO AWKWARD BECAUSE THEN MY CLASSMATE FRIENDS PEOPLE ASK ME WHY IM LAUGHING AND ITS SO AKWARD YOU MAKE MY DAY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU MORE AAAAASAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

I ALSO JUST FINISHED NEVERMORE AVAIALBLE NON FAST PASS CHAPTERS I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I. LOVE. IT. I LOVE FANTASY AND POWERS AND ACTION AND EVERYTHIGN MY FAVORITE CHARACTER IS LIKE DUKE OR LENORE I LOVE THEM THE SCRUNKLIES. LENORE AND ANNA DIVORCE ARC BETTER NOT LAST I WILL LITERALLY SCREAM BUT THEYRE BACKSTORY IS SO CUTE OMG LENORE LITERALLY COMMIT ARSON AND DISGUISED HERSELF AS A DUDE WITH A FAMILY AND EVERYTHING TO MEET ANNABELLE AGAIN THEYRE SO CUTE I LOVE THEM BUT WHY ANNABELLE WHY WOULD YOU DO DUKE LIKE THAT I STILL DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED IM SO CURIOUS WHYD SHE DO THAT I MEAN ITS IN CHARACTER BUT WHY DDDDD: I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. EULALIA IS SO SO SO SO SO COOL HER ABAILITY IS SO COOL I WASNT EXPECTING IT BUT I LIKE HER SPECTRE THE MOST OUT OF THE ONES WE SEE RIGHT NOW I LOVE HER ABILITY BUT NOW LENORE IS THE INKY ONE THAT HASNT MANIFESTED IN HER LITTLE GROUP SO IM EXPECTING VERY VERY GRAND MANIFESTATION OR NONE AT ALL BECAUSE OF SOME BIGGER REASON IM SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTERS I LOVE YOU THANK YOU FOR INTRODUCING ME I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT!!,! I WILL DO WHATEVER I NEED TO TO PAY BACK THE DEBT !,!,!

ANYWAYS IM SADDENED AND PLEASED TO SAY THAT I AM NOT 14 OR 15!! BOOM IM 13. GOD I SOUND SO YOUNG. I SWEAR IM NOT THAT DUMB THOUGH IM ALMOST STARTING HIGH SCHOOL AND SHSAT RESULTS COME OUT THIS THURSDAY SO THATS WHEN MY PARENTS DECIDE WHETEHER I DIE OR NOT!:!,!! WIHS ME LUCK!!!!

AND ABOUT THE GENDER THING IM BORN A GIRL BUT HONESTLY I COULD CARE LESS WHAT ANYONE CALLS ME SO GO WILD!!!!! AND MY REAL NAME IS SONIJA BUT ITS PORNOUNCED SONIA I DONT KNOW WHY THEY PUT THE J IN THERE THE AMOUNT OF TIMES MY TEACHERS HAVE CALLED ME SO-NI-JA IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE BUT ITS SO FUNNY BECAUSE THEN HALF THE CLASS CORRECTS THEM AND THEY ALWAYS FORGET IMMEDIATLEY AFTER ITS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS IF ANYONE THAT SEES THIS KNOWS ME IN REAL LIFE NO YOU DONT SHUT UP AND GO AWAY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I DONT NEED PEOPLE STALKING MY TUMBLR YALL ALREADY GOT TO MY OLD TIKTOK :((( ANYWAYS I AM OFFICIALY CONVINCED EVERY SOPHIE IS AN ANGEL. IVE MET EXACTLY TWO SOPHIES IN MY LIFE AND THEY ARE BOTH SO SWEET AND SO KIND AND SO FUN AND SO COOL AND EVERY OTHER WORD IN EXISTENCE YOUR THE THIRD AND YOUR THE COOLEST OUT OF ALL OF THEM I LOVE SOPHIES. AND I LOVE THE NAME CHERIE IT JUST SOUNDS SO SOPHISTICATED YK LIKE I SHOUDL OOOK UP TO THIS PERSON IM NPT SURE HOW TO EXPLAIN IT WHICH IS RARE BECAUSE I USUALLY ALWAYS HAVE SOMEHTING TO DAY MAYBE TODAYS LIKE A BAD DAY FOR ME OR SOMEHTING YEAH PRPOBABLY I JUST HAD TWO TESTS IM PRETTY SURE I FAILED MY ELA TEST BUT MY SOANISH TEST WASNT TOO BAD ACTUALLY IT WAS PRETTY EASY I WAS EXPECTING MORE HONESTLY BUT ILL STOP TALKING ABOUT THAT NOW I MIGHT JINX MYSELF AND FAIL THAT QUIZ AND I CAN NOT AFFORD TO DO THAT!!!,!!

IM A OROPHET GUYS. A GENIE. AN ORACLE. I SUCCESSFULLY READ THE VIBES AND GUESSED YOUR HAIR COLOR!!! BUT YES YOU SHOULD ABSOLITELY DO THAT PURPLE UNDERSIDE THING I LOVE THOSE THEYRE SO PRETTY IF YOU FIND A GOOD HAIR SALON IT WOULD BE SO SO SO PRETTY JUST MAKE SURE THEY DONT MIX UP THE COLROS I THINK BECAUSE WHEN I DID MY PRUPLE HAIR THING IT CAME OUT MORE OF LIKE A DIRTY REDDISH PURPLE COLOR AND HONESTLY I HATED IT SO TRIED GETTING IT OUT AS FAST AS POSSIBLE AND SWORE TO NEVER DYE MY HAIR THERE EVER EVER EVER AGAIN I WAS SO SAD WHEN I SAW THE RESULTS :( I THINK UNDERCOLOR THINGIES ARE SO UNDDERATED THOUGH THEY LOOK SO PRETTY AND AND PRETTY AND COOL AND IT JUST GIVES OFF SUCH A GREAT VOBE I IMMEDIATELY TRUST ANYONE THAT HAS AN UNDERCOLOR THING AND IS NICE PLEASE GET IT

ANYWAYS WE ARE OFFICIALLY MARRIED NOW PLEASE ACCEPT THE RING!,!!'!! 💍

I AM AIDEN. AIDEN IS ME. YOU CAN NOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE.

I'D LIKE TO POINT OUT SOME SIMILARITIES

no/little sense of personal space or boundaries until specified

absentish parental figure

loud and obnoxious

professional yappers

dont do well with silence and shit? idk he wanted music in the car when driving away so

love puzzles and stuff except hes a world record setter and i havent solved my rubixs cube in years

restless. very very VERY restless

adrenaline junkies only difference is i dont jump off 13 feet tall walls

humor coping mechanism

annoy people probably lol

smilies and nicknames and stuff

and most importantly

WE HAVE THE SAME BIRTHDAY

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY I WAS WHEN I FOUND OUT

oh yeah we also both like ashlyn lmao ur not slick aiden

THANK YOU FOR LISTYENING TO MY TED TALK!!!1!!1

[youranxiousnerd]

Second Chances Thoughts

bc what

spoilers below

i have...thoughts

ah no chaotic intro, f in the chat

it’s still a nice intro, tho

IM SORRY ARE THEY NOT SHOWING THE TRANSFORMATION?!?!

WHAT

THIS IS A HATE CRIME /j

i used the thingy

no bows either?!?!

this is called high school musical: the musical: the series not high school musical: the backstage drama: the series

wow they got changed fast

“Passable!” 

I’ll be the judge of that oh wait i cant bc they didnt show us

YES QUEEN ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES

ashlyn is such a queen

the perfect belle, stunning

“A couple letters, actually” it’s a sign (literally)

flower touch

AWWW REDLYN

STOP THEY’RE ADORABLE

they love each other so much

east high kids be snooping

not me thinking about carlos’ hand on seb’s back we were robbed im taking what i can get

“You were the perfect Belle tonight. I was really proud”

“Evil genius”

they’re so happy

AWWW A REDLYN KISS WHOOP WHOOP

kourt and howie are so awkward 

“drumroll?”

howie and seb would get along

weird little playoff, maybe he is lying?

they’re cute, tho

sad that they didn’t really get any build-up

“happy now?” “yes”

“If it’s with you, always” MY HEART

just like a fanfic

kourtney just invited north highs beast to east highs cast party

OH MY GOD MAZZARA IS ACTUALLY GETTING A STORY ABOUT HIM

i was not expecting that okay

ej and mazzara are the best

gina is so happy too bad it wont last

gina is an actress 

gahhhh portwell drama

oh god rini let the drama begin

that was very calm, did someone possess nini and ricky?

i really like them as best friends. i was a hardcore rini shipper last season but with all their constant conflict i realized how much fun they are as friends

“we are literally on the same page” 

“just for a moment” I LOST MY SHIT

miss jenn no

oooo seblos please be good

Seb calling Miss. Jenn out on her bullshit since idk when

“That’s a hard never mind now” okay wow

Miss. Jenn is Carlos’ godmother 

This is theatre, not football

CRYING GINA

gini

GINA SUPPORT DAY IS A THING PEOPLE!!!!!

oh wow a plot line actually being addressed

season 1 callback im not ready

gina and nini people!!! 

very sweet scene

ahha jamie callback we all knew it

i would really like to see miss jenns batb audition notes

“I’m in a great place, mentally” if you were you wouldn’t be saying that

OMFG IS SHE NOT GOING TO APOLOGIZE!?!?!

like that was a big deal, a big effing deal and then nothing?

you told a kid to jump off something high and you can’t even say “sorry”?!?!

back to the miss jenn love triangle

“I think I’m happy, or gettin’ there”

ricky you don’t have to be there yet it’s okay

that line hit

SEASON 1 OUTFITS

CORE 4 SONG

killer harmonies

sofia giving us that alto rep!!

portwell duet! audition outfits

very good, very very good. this song kinda screams autotune but it still sounds very good. 

last song of the season NOOO but very fitting

Is it just me or does “Second Chance” look like a music video they show in Justice (the teen store) in 2014?

cast bonding yay!

PAUSE THE ONLY SEBLOS MOMENT WE GOT THIS EPISODE WAS A WRIST HOLD?!?!!

DISNEY WTF

LIKE EVERY COUPLE GOT THEIR MOMENT AND ALL THEY GET IS A WRIST HOLD

BFBLBFIWGFSDMBF

shit why does my favorite ship have to be the gay one on a disney show?

east high booing the lily and french boi has me on the floor

“Big Red, you were also in it” BEST LINE OF THE FINALE OMFG

i missed antoine 

sorry carlos has glitter on his face

seb’s smile and wave at north high why am i laughing?

off topic but i have unintentionally started doing the seb wave (you know the one) (with the fingers) in real life.

also gay chair sit

e.j is also doing the gay chair sit 

lily what

you have had like one conversation

ew

she says she likes his face but not his personality? 

im calling bullcrap

pause didn’t lily steal the harness? are we just going to forget about that

probably, the writers did forgot to develop seblos

Let Ricky be single challenge

ANTOINE MY LOVE

REDLYN I LOVE YOU

SHUSH EJ’S SPEECH TIME TO SOB

ummmm

so this season has been for nothing?

all the shit they went through (the self-doubt, relationship problems, the injuries, the death threats) is for nothing?!?

since when does Miss. Jenn not care anymore about the Menkies?!?!

I actually get the kids side of this, but not Miss. Jenn’s. 

I was surprised they took this route with the Menkies, didn’t even cross my mind 

“It was five”

Big Red x medicine 

bet your ass ashlyn would have gotten a nomination best actress

“We got a pizza oven” THE EAST HIGH KIDS ARE COMMITTING ARSON

is mazzara staying for miss jenn? they could do long distance but it doesnt have the best rep in this show

gini

ashlyn is the captain of the portwell ship and nini is her right hand man (or whatever second best is called in sailing)

NINI MAKIN THE DEALS

RICKY WHY ARE YOU CALLING HER

WHYYYYYY

“Will you be my first kiss” smiles

OH MY GOD

WAIT NOTHING

WHAT

OMFG THEY CUT IT LMAO

“this summer is about to get hot” SUMMER SEASON 3?!?!

ANTOINE

OMFG HE BETTER COME BACK

I LOVE ABF

WAIT THATS IT

FWBEGLEWG

THATS IT

hey they ended with andrew barth feldman what more can you ask for?

Thats...it?

Oh wait some cast stuff...brb ima cry. The ending has some very series finale energy...I’m scared. Natalie wouldn’t have done the “buckle up wildcats” if there wasn’t a season 3, right? But the bloopers at the end...

The cast ending was great. “You are the Music in Me” was so heartfelt and I’m a sucker for bloopers.

Wait so no Lily home? It was probably a cut scene. 

If we got Lily home, can we get an album with the cast singing all the BATB songs? 

I have so many mixed feelings about this episode. Here is the thing, if you love the core 4 then this was your episode. If you’re like me and prefer the side leads then this was probably a little disappointing since we barely saw them. This episode felt rushed and a little messy, but there were some great moments. Season 2′s writing has felt a little weird. This season lacked the chaotic theater kid energy season 1 had. It was one of the reasons I fell in love with the show. If/when we get a season 3 I really hope the writers find that energy again.

Let’s all give a round of applause for the cast and crew who filmed majority of the season during a global pandemic. That could not have been easy. They gave us a pretty good season under crazy conditions. They definitely had to change some things to fit the current climate. Overall, hats off the the cast and crew because you guys killed it. 

I’m really going to miss this show, hopefully it gets renewed. It has become a comfort show these past several weeks. My sanity says “no, don’t go” but my sleep schedule says “leave.”

To second chances!!

[omegawolverine]

LET ME HEAR THE VERSION OF MAXIMUM RIDE THAT LIVES IN UR HEAD RENT FREE

oh dear god are you gonna regret asking...

-fax is not a thing bc i hate cishets /j

-max bisexual transgirl who just talks about Women with fang bc they're gay best friends now.

-fang is autistic. and gay. a dumb boy kisser. he likes men. also a he/they user :] has a lot of food related sensory issues which sucks :/ also the feeling of skin rubbing against his drives him fucking crazy

-nudge is an enby transfem lesbian with adhd who will hyperfixate on basically any and every fashion trend she likes. uses she/they pronouns btw annnnd they once tried to steal a whole bunch of y2k fashion stuff from a store, which they wouldve gotten away with doing so had max not seen and then snatched their ass up 😔

-gazzy adhd combined type and he stims a lot with his wings !! also says poggers as a vocal stim idc if the series was set way before poggers was a thing, he says it.

-big man iggy is a pansexual transman with inattentive type adhd :] will hyperfixate on just about any tv show ever and will then go regurgitate that information to fang bc they info dump to each other on the reg. also iggy has lil dancey stims that he does while cooking bc i said so

-angel...i just think shes the type to commit arson. this has no place in my actual version of maxium ride but i just think she should commit arson at some point......

-i think the last like two books in the actual series (not the spinoff or whatever the fuck it is bc i havent read it still despite owning the book) should just not exist and instead they just get therapy and get to be real kids. like when they went to an actual school type beat but without the drama and almost dying and wacko science stuff

-also get rid of all the confusing sibling plotlines like the characters can stay but im just. fuck the weird sibling shit it's so unnecessary. the only siblings in this version are the dumbass bird children

-angel would be a gifted kid not even bc of the whole mind reading bit but just bc she's smart 🤷‍♀️ probably neurodivergent but i havent come up with any specifics

-max curb stomps a homophobe at some point for my own enjoyment

-fang keeps his long hair bc fuck you that's why /j (no but actually the long hair is a must in my version)

- ^ also. braids. everyone braids their hair bc they look pretty with them. they're a pretty boy, what can i say?

-gazzy gets weirdly into skater fashion at some point just bc

-nudge gets box braids and gets to be around other black people for once. also she uses aave

i think that's about it all the dumb shit i should share about this wack ass version i came up with literally ages ago to soothe my own growing anger towards that bitch of a series. had it not been for my own hyperfixation, she would be dead to me /hj

[15minutesright-blog]

this is an all dialogue attempt that had more editing than most of the stuff up, but not a lot more, so don’t hold your breath.  It was based off a prompt by @fancytreatment​. I don’t quite think I did it justice but oh well. Sorry in advance my guy. (prompt listed at the end)

“Hello?”

“Hi hi! Whats up? Did you leave something at my house or-”

“Yeah, um, no.  actually, so, remember that church we went to?”

“Which one? When was that?”

“You know. The one we went to last Easter? A few towns over?”

“Yeah…? What about it?”

“Okay, so after I left your house i may have stopped by the store on the way home where I may have run into those weird kids-”

“The ones that wear the cat ears?” “No, the ones with the piercings and flannels and combat boots… you know, the ones with that one kid you’re always on about... with the purple hair, the one who’s always repping some band shirt and smoking or something?”

“Oh”

“God, what’s her name? Its a J name… i think it has an i in it...  jess, jim, jackie, ja-”

“Gina?”

“HA! I knew you liked her!”

“What? No! I can’t help that im just better at names than you are”

“Right right, of course. My bad”

“Oh, shut up... Did you call for something or what?”

“Oh yeah, right. So like i said, left your house, store, see the kids, and me being the good friend that i am, i go up and make contact with the group. You know,  see if i can’t put in a good word for you with Gina and all that.”

“And?”

“AND, i got you her number!”

“You did!?” “You know it! How awesome am I?”

“Yeah, you’re alright i guess…. Wait, what does this have to do with that church from Easter?”

“Oh yeah, so. In order to get you her number I had to go help the whole gang out with something. They said they just needed a driver? I guess none of them have a car. Anyways, I take them to the church and they tell me to wait for them and that it’ll only take 15 minutes.I say ‘sure, fine, whatever’. At this point they know I’m only here for Gina’s number so i guess they were cool with giving it? I mean Gina seemed more than willing for me to pass on her number if you catch my drift.”

“Focus”

“Right. So they scurry around a tree to the far side of the church so I can’t see nothing, but I hear this chanting...Then, all of the sudden I feel this surge of heat and the group is running back to the car yelling at me to ‘open the doors’ and then ‘go go go’. And so as I pull out of the parking lot like a mad man I look back into the rear-view mirror and I see the whole freaking church is up in flames! And so-”

“Wait, wait wait...YOU COMMITTED ARSON!?”

“No I only-”

“I can’t believe i’m friends with a arsonist”

“Dude I-”

“My best friend just committed arson”

“Wait no-”

“OH MY GOD! Does you telling me an accomplice!?!?!”

“Dude”

“What if my mom finds out?”

“Dude”

“What if the school board finds out!?”

“Dude”

“What if this goes on my permanent record and i cant get into college!!?”

“Dude”

“What!?”

“I didn’t just commit arson”

“oh yeah?”

“yeah, i was only...maybe an… unwilling accomplice in it”

“DUDE!”

“AND! Don’t even worry about it, its not like your name will ever come up, you really think I’d drag you into this?”

“...no”

“Good. so, like I was saying, I dropped those punk-satanist-freaks off like if was hot as soon as i passed the school and so now im just driving and around and I was wondering...”

“No.”

“Dude! I didn’t even get a chance to ask!”

“No, you cannot come over”

“Please? I never got a chance to pick up food at the store and you know my mom works the late shift and I know tonight is lasagna night”

“No”

“Common, I’m in emotional distress, pretty please?”

“No”

“Common, i got you psychopaths number”

“Okay, fine, but-”

“Yes! Thanks man! I’ll see you in 5.”

“Wait donthangup-

Prompt:  “Wait, wait, wait- What do you mean you just committed arson?”

(so you see, I went a little rampant, but its fine (maybe))

if you got this far tell me honestly how you think it went? Im not sure how personable the characters actually came out to be and im not sure how follow-able the dialogue actually is? Thanks in advance :)