#jokes.. unless | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

call-me-pup2 · 1 year ago

Text

"Hey babe I found this little pathetic looking cat boy at the side of the road please can I keep him? Please please please! I'll look after him really well! He'll be my little play thing to keep me entertained when you're not home"

26 notes · View notes

beaft · 7 months ago

Text

it is legit bizarre to me how hard video game creators and film directors and showrunners try to pretend that fat people don't exist. can you think of the last time you saw a fat person in a lead role? god forbid a fat woman? i can walk down the street or go into a shop or restaurant and see fat people everywhere but then i switch on the tv and suddenly it's like a glimpse into an alternate universe where no one has a bmi over 24. insidious and weird

#i don't wanna sound dramatic but it's just so crazy that it's like this and nobody even talks about it #tbh disability is like this too - you don't see fat people and you don't see disabled people unless it's a joke or a plot point #'we don't want to glamourise obesity' it's not 'glamourising' anything. it's showing the world as it is.#sure you can create a world devoid of all the people you don't find aesthetically pleasing but at least acknowledge that you're doing that #fatphobia #weight talk cw #ableism #be shh now #containment breach

22K notes · View notes

cleaverqueer · 1 year ago

Text

petition to change LGBT to DFTQ (Dykes Faggots Trannies and Queers, naturally)

#this is a joke unless you take it too seriously and get mad #then its genuine

77K notes · View notes

wintermav · 11 months ago

Text

HE’S A GREAT WHAT—?

#but how does he know…unless!!#canon poolverine? yeah #i don’t take these types of jokes lightly mr huge. hence it can’t be a joke! IT MUSNT #hugh jackman #deadpool and wolverine #ryan reynolds #Deadpool 3 #logan howlett #logan x wade #Wade Wilson #Deadpool #Wolverine #deadpool x wolverine

18K notes · View notes

claitea · 3 months ago

Text

Seeing him lie motionless on the floor... She finally understood what drove him to make that horrific mistake 3,000 years ago.

#pokemon #pokemon legends za #plza #pokemon az #eternal flower floette #clai's art #cw character death #cw death #misinterpreted a joke message in a server as an actual angst suggestion so uhhhh oopsie here's floette activating the ult weapon herself <3 #not a believer in az will die in plza. unless its for this HKABWJWBJF #i'm sure if az did die she wouldnt even think about this. but just listen. what if she did.....

3K notes · View notes

c1ittorus · 10 months ago

Text

masturbating’s not enough i need someone to come make me squirt

#this is just a joke #unless #cnc k!nk #cnc free use #squ!rt #br33d1ng #breeding k1nk #bd/sm kink #bd/sm brat #princess treatment

5K notes · View notes

fedoraspooky · 3 months ago

Text

I.... do not come up here anymore. I miss him.

#tumblr #april fools #of bygone years #coppy #gif #it rly does feel weird that there doesnt appear to be a joke this year #unless it kicks in later when we least expect it XD #or the joke is on us for expecting a joke?#with tumblr operating on a skeleton crew and all #...STILL THO TUMBLR ITS NOT TOO LATE #YOU CAN BRING HIM BACK

2K notes · View notes

technically-human · 2 months ago

Text

5 PhDs + 1

@lalalaurieart happy birthday! I offer you one of my silly headcanons

None of Robotnik's degrees are in medicine. Why should he care about that? His interest in the human body ends with his own. That is, until one time when Stone got really hurt, and the Doctor could do nothing. He coped by... teaching himself everything there is to know about medicine! He's very normal like that. Never bothered getting a degree for that one though.

#lalastobotnik #stobotnik #doctor ivo robotnik #agent stone #sonic movie universe #robotnik really pushed himself here. he didn't sleep for days #he's currently in worse shape than stone who got shot in the chest #this comic was a bit of a struggle for me. i kept wondering if the jokes ruined it?#like should i be serious for once?#but joking is my thing. i love joking #so i went well then i can avoid the serious part #but that didn't feel right either #i tried to find a balance. i don't know if i managed #cw blood #also sleeveless turtleneck because... because.#stone would never give the doctor his recipe unless he genuinely thought he was dying #because those lattes are one of the only things he feels he can do for the doctor #you know. something that makes him irreplaceable #robotnik kinda understands it but he doesn't think about it too much #yeah i'm a bit nervous about this one can you guys tell?#let me know what you think maybe

1K notes · View notes

rongzhi · 5 months ago

Text

Starting off the new year with a bang

English added by me :)

#douyin #video #tiktok #jokes aside i looked it up and #BROADLY speaking the punishment for setting off fireworks where it's illegal (roadside) is a monetary fine of 100-500rmb #unless this is considered a 'severe' case* in which case the penalty is 5-10 days detention+fine #(*probably wasn't since it's an empty road)(Unless there was a dry weather/poor weather advisory which would count as severe circumstances)#Large scale illegal fireworks displays would be fined 10k-50k rmb #....if anyone's interested

2K notes · View notes

iamasaddie · 30 days ago

Text

Joel Miller picking you up for a post-outbreak date <3

#your first couple activity is killing a bloater #and then he treats you with torturing some raiders #this is all a joke btw #unless??#joel miller edit #joel miller gif #joelmilleredit #joel miller #tlou spoilers #tlouedit #tlou gif #pedro pascal gifs #pedropascaledit #pedro pascal gif #pedropascal #pedro pascal #iamasaddie gif

1K notes · View notes

inkskinned · 3 months ago

Text

okay i almost never address the very small amount of internet fame i have. and sometimes yes it sucks. people often repost my work, or clip it out of context, or flat-out steal it. but like it can be very funny. once a follower dm'd me to say a guy on hinge was pretending to be "inkskinned", and actually had even started his own insta. when she said "i've followed her for years i don't think you're her", he said - actually r.i.d is like seven people, we just made those initials up. (rude). when i found his insta and messaged him, he begged me to just lie and say he was r.i.d because "it's hard for men to date."

once someone said she should be allowed to plagiarize my work because she was a body-positive influencer and that if i "made a big deal" about this and "got her cancelled", i would be doing damage to my own community and i was never "actually" an ally.

i bear these things with the aura of a martyr, the way my catholic father raised me to. i message privately. i handle things quietly and quickly. i do not complain because i am very, very, very, very blessed and i know that. mercy and gentleness literally pour out of me every morning when i wake up, and then i have to mop the floors for how very Good i am.

however today is the first time i have ever had a very specific problem that neither requires me to correct this person nor throw them to the dogs but is somehow worse than years of hatemail, reddit thread death threats, and pinterest reposts:

someone quoted me and just got it, like, a little wrong.

#. like #she got 80% of the quote right. and i could say something. but she got the gist of it right?#and - i literally cant stop pacing. like she's not wrong. but like?#this is obviously a joke by the way !!!!!! but it was surprising to me that even tho im practically #Invulnerable to all Psychic attacks #..... it's the neurodivergence bc i want to correct her so badly but i can't correct her bc that would be mean #bc she's fine !!!! and she seems sweet!!!!!!! but!!#im aware this is not an issue by the way this is very clearly tongue in cheek #also the r.i.d thing made me laugh when he said it for a lot of reasons #legally my last initial is actually p. which would be problematic from an initial standpoint #as i either have rp #which feels like i'm saying Roleplay #OR i have . well. RIP. so u can imagine why i couldn't use THAT #luckily since im hispanic my name is the longest thing in like 23 parts so i just chose #a different (kinda in the middle) part of my last name #i had options in this btw i just did the math and i had over 20 ways to do my initials #to be deleted probably unless the people Crave the Small Internet Fame Stories

2K notes · View notes

ruubesz-draws · 1 year ago

Text

Showing off the babies

(I watched Ultraman Rising! It was good!)

Bonus:

From this

6K notes · View notes

stealingpotatoes · 1 year ago

Note

Hey! What do you think of the Cal Kestis being Obitine's secret lovechild AU? I would never want it to be canon, but it is fun to think about. I can just imagine Bo-Katan visiting Cal and just being like...

Bo-Katan: Are you Cal Kestis?

Cal: Yes...?

Bo-Katan: Well it turns out you are the secret heir to the throne of Mandalore...

*cue Din trying to shove the darksaber into Cal's hands*

counterpoint, just hear me out for a second