#just point us in the right direction
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today was actually such a nice workday - i spent part of my lunchbreak gossiping with my coworker about the traitors episode tonight and our predictions and two different coworkers offered to do TWO tasks ive been putting off for weeks for me bc i didnt want to do them, and they did it in half the time it would have taken me
#this morning my old manager (?) was like oh im gonna do [task] if thats okay? and i was like OMG YES GO AHEAD#and then after lunch she was like i literally have nothing to do can i help with the archives?#and i was like sadly i have all these files i need to close first and she went oh no. ill get my assistant to help me instead#just point us in the right direction#they made so much progress#hopefully theres other days like that in the future#workposting#i did also however have a rude client on the phone but i successfully offloaded him onto a more senior coworker (sorry dude)
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About trust in tbhx, i think its kinda crazy that when Nice died, Lin Ling could continue being Nice with basically all the powers involved - those powers that stem from trust. It's just kinda crazy that the public have more faith in the idea of Nice rather than Nice the person who was actually doing all the saving. Like they could not care less who's behind the mask.
#like yeah they still locked him away and had him train but i assumed that was cos people wouldnt believe he's nice right away#and then nice's original trust points became his#all this just to say so if ogNice isnt dead and everyone's directing their trust for Hero Nice to Lin Ling#would ogNice return to being how he used to be before trust changed him?#tbhx#to be hero x#nice#yapping
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Tartarus is still a little broken and that's Fun !
#so far playing through all of this i have to say. the no level cap increase makes me feel cheated#with how much questing we're doing and all#iirc they said they wanted to take companion promos seriously but did this whole. Hawkules thing#where you have to get a drop and they eventually needed to increase its rate in this recent update#and if you wanted it without farming you have to pay 10 bucks worth of crowns for it now#you know! to promote a companion! but see you can just BUY a companion in the crownshop using that real money#if you cant tell ive not been a fan of this new promotion method and this is taking it 'seriously'?#granted ive just started tartarus so i kind of want to hold my tongue and see the rest for myself rn#so far these quests are Good and Bad. they definitely went in the right direction but. no level cap kind of hurts.#still feels like we're stuck in one place even though we're moving forward#there's a lot of great concepts and even better dialogue to even out the bad#but at what point do we feel it's worth doing all this effort for. a couple new mid comps and a chance at a main comp promo?#keep in mind all this posting is just my own opinion. i know there's ppl out there that either love or loathe these additions#and i find myself in the middle tbh#i find this story fine and good so far i guess but i don't know if i'm still going to feel this way by the end of it#and yes yes 'be grateful p101 even got updates' while wiz continues to get new worlds and level cap increases. wonderful to be where we are#rambling#vent
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signalisheads. ninesolsheads. ive swapped your tragic doomed yuri. they're getting enrichment i swear
#signalis#nine sols#ariane#elster#lady ethereal#xiaohe#lady ethereal nine sols#xiaohe nine sols#elster signalis#ariane signalis#siiiigh somehow drawing elster ariane ninesolsstyle is harder than drawing lady ethereal xiaohe in signalis situations#coulda taken it further n gijinkad em or whateva but i didnt feel like it#elster ig is closes to one a them .... genoguards ? i guess ? or maybe even to chiyou n xingtian since they were made w actual solarians#right?#the elster ariane as direct xiaohe lady ethereal swaps dont make much sense and i was like hold on this should probably be ''lilith'' not#elster.but then thatd make ariane alina instead and the Point of ariane is the her as lady ethereal boss fight. so#and as for ariane lady ethereal boss fight design. sigh.#well the obvious choice was to falke her. so then i went well whats falke. soldier? whats soldier in nine sols. jiequan & co i guess? i onl#spiked her guantlets tho u can barely tell#and then i wanted some kinda long ....coat thing.........this prob doesnt make sense#shoulda prob gone harder on nine sols than on the signalis aspects#but also shrug emote. i didnt feel like using 100% of my brain#lady ethereal xiaohe as ariane elster was ez enough i just albinism'd (or whatever ariane got) lady ethereal a lil#xiaohe i should have changed her fur color technically but erm. she looked bad with blue/black fur. so#anyway i could draw more w them ig if anyones interested but it rlly depends..whateva#anywayyy go play nine sols/signalis a game taking place on a very normal ''spaceship'' with the expected amount of meat on it. dw you'll se#this thang has been in my drafts for like a week lets post it at ass o clock in the morning (thumbs up emoji)
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i sort of feel like the longer this show goes on the more i will grow in indifference toward it and then at some point things will shift and i’ll be able to enjoy it again but from like a detached horror-appreciating perspective because i don’t love the characters how i used to anymore and i no longer feel invested in them being good and okay
#like i used to feel very emotionally invested in adrien and marinette’s relationship#and i used to get a lot of joy out of seeing them together#i don’t really anymore because of the direction that the show has taken#and i think if it keeps going on like this i’ll eventually get to a point where i can just view them indifferently as characters#and at that point i’ll be able to enjoy the admittedly interesting horrifying thing they’ve got going on#right now it just feels too sad to do that bc i miss loving them so much#but much more of this and maybe i’ll be over it and then i can just watch the show as a show#and appreciate the horrifying scenarios#and recognize that it is truly Not That Deep#sorry for the melodrama i feel like miraculous ladybug broke up with me suddenly in the s5 finale and ive been coping.#i really DO find complicated horrifying stories interesting. i just never wanted that for adrien and marinette. yknow#i wanted them to have a good ending#i wanted them to love each other#i never expected that it would turn out like this#again!!! sorry for the melodrama. unfortunately i am just melodramatic#i will keep drawing pictures don’t worry
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& by the way i literally CONSTANTLY think about how loop uses the partys titles to create distance to remind themself that those arent 'their versions' of them. that theyre not loops party anymore. and yet and yet and yet
#talk tag#i think about 'and because of you bonnie was-' DAILYYYYYY#god. god. they care s mcuhghfjkbjkdklj#i think that may be the only time until twohats that they ever use any of the partys names. except! for reminding sif if u get that dialogu#which. im also normal about. clearly obviously absolutely#they create that distance as much as they can and yet. for siffrin.#godddddd i need to be sedated#isat spoilers#okay oh my god i went back to check to make sure i was right and turns out i forgor a couple of times both of which make me even more ill#one is technically under the umbrella of twohats bc its at the very end when loop says theyll need to accept everyones thanks. and they say#-everyones names. and the other is at the very very beginning in the initial battle tutorial they say everyones names + stats#(which btw PROVES MY POINT abt so much of loops help going under the radar bc in any other game itd just be a regular tutorial with no-#-in universe correlation or effect)#but they start with 'heres some basic stats about you and your party members to remember' and i. the. like realistically the explanation-#-for loop using their names instead of titles. is bc adrienne thought using their titles would make it too obvious someone else was talking#since u havent met loop yet at that point and dont know its not a regular tutorial thats only directed at the player and not the character#But Also: heres some things you should remember about your party members [lists their names]#im normal. im fine and normal. prommy#... okay it turns out they also say isabeaus name when giving the paper mache hands tutorial. no idea what to make of that one aklfjdlksjf#and after the change god event when u bring it up they say 'mirabelles statue'#And Thats It. fascinating. what is the logic there#isatposting
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The fact that Vox could be Santa Claus and actively chooses not to is the reason I can't fuck with him on a fundamental level
#just hear me out for a second#he knows when you're sleeping he knows when you're awake#he has SO much money#he could use it to advertise the vees products#he could give them versions of their products that are cheaply made and break down within a couple months#so at that point they've had it for so long that they feel like they need it so they buy another one#the one they buy is super expensive and made more professionally#they could do a parody of Santa Baby called Santa Voxxy#Val would direct a movie with the same name#Vox refuses to star in it#no one actually gets coal though#except Alastor#but that's just Vox throwing rocks at his radio tower until he gets chased away#which he probably does all year round so idk if that counts#so yeah Santa Vox#this is the shit I think about at work btw#hazbin hotel#vox hazbin hotel#the vees#the vees hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel shitpost#y'know I just say things on this app#i never know wtf I'm talking about#i'm right though
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It's competitive but I think my favorite Conan anecdote is when he told his therapist "Everyone hates me, they think I have no talent and they wish I would just go away," and his therapist said "That's called negative self-talk and you have to realize it's just the depression talking" and Conan said "Self-talk? I'm just quoting my latest review!"
#I know this sounds like a joke and it is but apparently it also really happened#Conan was telling his therapist he felt like everyone hated him and his therapist was trying to convince him it was all in his head#and he was like everything I just said was a direct quote from a review#this was at his lowpoint when he was like a hair's breadth from getting fired and the press was absolutely eating him alive#gotta respect a guy who's forced to eat shit on national TV and gets absolutely humiliated and ground into the dirt by someone he trusted-#-and he doesn't even bitch about it he just gets right back up and gets a new show and becomes even funnier#like he fully understood that his legacy wasn't about being liked it was about a) treating people right and b) being the funniest man alive#and he did both of those things and continues to do both of those things so I think he's going to be fine#or as he put it “I've been up and I've been down but I have a certain skillset and I'd like to be of use for as long as its viable”#I think he's letting go of acclaim at this point... or that's the impression I got from the nyt piece#not that he's not grateful but he no longer sees it as an objective or even an accomplishment to be loved and acclaimed#it's more about the act of creation and the creative output itself bc that's the part that continues to matter thirty years later#conan o'brien
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Fortune
#WAHOO new durge to celebrate new pc#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 durge#the dark urge#man i had no idea how terrible my old build was my monitor was GARBAGE compared to this one and my new graphics are sooooo much better like#its a whole new world lmfao#unfortunately i am struggling getting windows to point my storage in the right direction and i dont have photoshop anymore w my actions ):#i had to use the portable version just to sharpen this....pain
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but i'm not supposed to scratch
#undescribed#bonk.png#uninhabited planet survive#mujin wakusei survive#HOOO BOY this is extremely self indulgent bc i like fake episodes n storylines for things n sharla is my second fav of the bunch#before i forgot caption is a line from love me more by mitski n the dialogue is taken straight from wakaba's elevator scene in utena#just altered for the characters' genders obv back to yapping all the pieces were in place for sharla to have a jealousy subplot like in the#second half of the show (after adam is introduced basically) sharla n luna dont as much focus together with the secondary character to luna#shifting to kaoru bc of being more involved in directdanger all the time n sharla not being good at that stuff is relegated to the sidelines#which is something shes insecure about!! shes not as good at survival action as everyone else n doesnt have anything skills unique to her#she LITERALLY stops taking her rations of water so the others can have more bc she feels like she doesnt matter as much as the others!!#shes fairytale girl sharla which is good for morale (esp luna's) but not particularly helpful when theyve gone a few days with no food#she also is implied to have no proper friends before meeting luna in the first episode (at which point they immediately become ride or die)#with her only sort of friend being a girl she hung out with despite her being bullied n excluded who then left her for the bullies#n episode 17 is about her wanting luna to be able to rely on her with them sharing eachother's history of loneliness#the show also has a emphasis on their circumstances escalating emotions n causing them to lash out at eachother theres a episode right b4#the winter arc where howard is jealous n lashes out bc hes used to being the center of attention but no on on the island really likes himdue#to him being a brat so he soaks up adam's attention like a sponge n freaks out when adam starts favoring menori#which is understandble n somewhat easy to digest n process but you know who has a more prominent history of loneliness n abandonment who is#also prone to insecurity n thrives on someone's affection? sharla n i set this fake story line during the space criminals arc bc it doesnt#really have a lot of character work n takes place right after the winter arc with both having the characters stuck inside for most of it bc#of more direct serious danger n sharla along with chako n shingo would be stuck inside the most BUT with the criminals arc chako n shingo#are actively doing something theyre contributing but all sharla can do is watch adam while luna her bestie luna is out dealing with people#literally hunting them with kaoru who is notably better than everyone else at the whole survival action thing has become closer to lunasince#the winter arc n from what sharla has seen has no flaws or weaknesses theres specific reasons as to why i dont think her negative feelings#would be focused on the others bc for varying reasons she wouldnt feel they threaten her relationship with luna (the rationalization for#bell not being viewed as a possible threat is interesting to me bc of the similarities between him n sharla both of them bonding early on n#her being implied to have a crush on him while he explicitly has a crush on luna but thats not what we're talking about rn)#but none of those reasons really apply to kaoru n she has the reason of Him Saying He Killed Someone to feel more justified in directing#all her stress about their situation n the anxiety crawling up her throat about luna potentially choosing someone else over her onto him
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1.01 / 2.17 (41)
#I love how out of so many callbacks in E41 (and even a direct E01 flashback) we also get this tiny little E01 callback#I love how Mahidevran immediately steps in to assure her son that she won't leave him in *any* uncertainty that may come#whether it's about them both facing the unknown future in Topkapi for the first time that would truly point to the separation Mustafa fears#(but rather separation from Süleiman and Ibrahim for *both* Musti and Mahi right from the start that Musti will sense and not take well)#or *someone else* facing an unknown future with the *exact* seperation attached to it that Mustafa fears - separation from mom#(and Musti relates and sympathizes with that situation instead perhaps namely due to whatever separation he's experienced)#(also Musti having grown fonder of his brothers as well; this whole gifset can sorta sum up Mustafa's development#re: his feelings for his brothers up until now but that will be a post for another day:))#I love how both scenes are staged with the direction emphasizing the vastness of the castle in E01 making Musti and Mahi smaller as if#they are sucked in already before even entering there but they still lean on each other seeking each other like a child seeks#his mother's closeness and E41 being set in Mahi's chambers the castle having already become their home and Musti getting this#accustomed that he has his own chambers already and goes to his mother's just to visit but always feeling at ease & the same goes for Mahi#they're already used to some distance and it is even encouraged to an extent (E34) but they're always there for each other#and Mahi gets joyful relief of SS calling hse in her chambers instead of the frantic nervousness that overtook her in E01#when SS didn't even *visit* her and her son; Mustafa gets a little sad look when SS calls her here instead of the insistence for#SS and Ibrahim to come but he goes to his room calmly & respectfully anyway for his mother to have her moment while in E01 he couldn't see#anything outside of his father's absense and of course he's like that he's a child but it's like they've all grown up and come so far aww#also the reversal of their positions in the two scenes and them talking on equal footing <33#just me fangirling all around for no reason <33#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#muhtesem yuzyil#mahidevran sultan#sehzade mustafa
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Okay that look that ADC gives Laura? I can just see all of your Lexa au looking at Clarke like that and I can’t with the softness.
You're not wrong
But also...
#anon#it's giving jealous MBFW Clarke vibes#you're not wrong tho!#that doting look like#CoA Lexa any time she's anywhere in Clarke's general proximity#romeo Lexa is always a fool in love and it's written right across her face#AWTR Lexa. when I said Gus could barely recognize his daughter anymore this is what I meant#at no point had his serious and stoic daughter ever been#... bubbly 🤨#but yeah no initially this just gave me MBFW vibes (without the crack) because that's why Costia scared the shit out of Clarke#more than anyone ever had#cuz Lexa... she genuinely felt something for Costia#and Clarke could tell#because before Lexa had only ever looked at her like that#don't kick my ass ok#what Clarke just doesn't realize is that Lexa still looks at her exactly like that. only even more stupidly in love#she's just so used to it she doesn't see it anymore#but seeing even a fraction of that detected at someone else?#like sledgehammer to the chest#directed**
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One of the interesting bits of trying to resume working on the game after so long is looking back at my ancient Draft Placeholder versions of an image from 4 yrs ago trying to remember what the hell I meant back then, to hopefully interpret it into some more final (ish..) form of the same thing .. making slow progress lol
#At this point I've decided it's just a consistent design decision to have the sketchy slightly wonky sort of art ghbjj#I simply don't have the digital art skills/tools/patience (mostly that) to do 100% digital things and have a Clean Polished Professional#Neat Looking Perfect Crisp Lines sort of thing like one would see in most games. I'm drawing everything in pencil half decently (not strict#ly making sure every line is straight or that the perspective even makes sense) and then scanning it in and coloring it on the computer#and that's about it. In another world I could hire an artist or two to do professional backgrounds and charcter art or etc. - but as I am#a mere penniless peasant hermit with functioning issues who has to do every aspect of everything themselves - I'm just going to do#what is possible within the time frame/my ability/etc. and then just be like ''ah you see! actually this is intentional~ it has a homemade#crafty hand drawn sort of charm about it - yes? this was the direction all along!!'' LOL#Which for the record I'm not like complaining that it's necssarily Bad or anything - more just I suppose not the Professional Polished#style you Typically see in a lot of things - again the like - sketchy unclean lines of it all.#(like I think usually people use some sort of symmetry tool to make sure that all sides of a box are neat and clean and have that#Professional Game Art type of feel about them - rather than 'this is a scan of scraggily pencil lines in which I did not even bother to use#a ruler or try to get them all that even' lol). So it's not that it's BAD really.#just I think.. perhaps ''unconventional'' compared to the examples of other#games I've looked at. BUT. the point is to convey an idea. I think your art has failed if you do not convey a concept properly. But so#long as it meets your purposes and is not SOO cluttered/scribbly that nobody can even tell what's going on (unless that IS your intention)#then like.. I think it's fine. You can tell a house is a house even if it's not polished. No worries. (<convincing myself)#ANYWAY.. also 'Nanyevimi Market Quest' is still SUCH a placeholder name but I genuinely can never think of anything else so#I've just been going with it for now ToT... There's no distinct actual throughline story/plot so there's no 'theme' to base a title#around. Kind of like how 'The Sims' is just called the sims because naming it like 'Sims: Downfall Of Pleasantview' (one of the#towns in TS2 i think) would be a weird misname since what happens in the game totally depends on what you choose to do with it#So you can't really name it anything THAT specific (a player might not even choose to have a house in Pleasantview. what then? etc).#So it's just like..uh well...GENERALLY speaking.. everyone is uh.. on a personal quest..vaguely.. which takes place in a Market street full#of shops.. and you are mostly talking to shopkeepers... BUT it's not just a Market Quest since it's also in a fantasy world.. so we need to#give the fantasy world name.. and that's about it. I'm just at a loss for anything else. Maybe the like 2 and a half playtesters I#manage to scrounge up will have better ideas ghhh.. 'Nanyevimi Quest: Get To Know Some Shopkeepers' 'Find A Job In Fantasy World' you could#say 'Market Adventure' but some would argue just having a bunch of conversations and wandering around is not much of a real adventure.#don't want to set people up for thinking there's any drama or combat or anything. 'Do Menial Errands For Mentally Ill Elves Simulator' ghjg#(also sidenote: the '''chibi'' style versions of the characters on the menu screen....EVIL.. that style is SOOO hard for me to draw in for#some reason.. I just can't get the proportions right/have trouble fully ''simplifying'' the design.. took me HOURS lol... aUGHh)
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If I had the motivation and skillset for it I'd make an entire video essay about how the FNF modding scene has changed -- and not about scringus and dingus or the various dramas they've gotten into over the years, but legitimately how the scene has changed from so much creatively and love for the base game cast and people's original characters to creepypasta characters being recycled over and over and the actual canonical characters being downright ignored unless it's the now rare and far more considerably niche remix mod or the one in a million original mod
#Friday Night Funkin#FNF Mods#I'm using creepypasta as a sort of standin but. You get what I'm saying right#And this isn't to say said creepypasta mods don't have their own passion and creativity! It just eventually gets to a point-#Where it's so overdone that I don't care how unique it is because there's so many that do almost the exact same thing#Like go to any channel of a popular FNFtuber and look at the ratio of creepypasta/crossover mods-#to mods focusing on base cast/original characters#Or any recent FNF Direct type video#I stopped watching those specifically because the last one I watched#Out of like 20-30 mods there were only TWO I was really interested in#And the rest were just creepypasta/pibby/horror junk#And crossovers with things I had no interest in#Smth like Spooky Mix getting as popular as it did genuinely makes me so happy because that. Just feels like a rarity nowadays#ESPECIALLY with Skid and Pump; who are like the most ignored characters ever in current FNF culture
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Hey y'all! Idk if I've actually been posting less, or if I've just been feeling like I've been posting less, but this anemia has really been kicking my butt. I am still sewing, and I have not forgotten the request to make a blorbo crochet pattern, I've just been kinda moving slow This isn't really a request for advice on dealing with anemia (I'm taking iron supplements and adding red meat and, as my mom would say, "dark green leafies" to my food as much as possible), just a like heads up that my posting might be a little slow until the iron supplements actually start kicking in That said, if you have any experience and/or advice for whatever treatments are given when iron supplements are not enough, I know nothing about that and it's looking increasingly possible that the supplements aren't going to be enough?
#the person behind the yarn#anemia mention#medical mention#got my bloodwork done last week and my iron has not gone down!#...it just also hasn't gone up#after six weeks on supplements#I mean the like secondary anemia blood measurement things are moving in the right direction#the like...I think it's MCV? and the red blood cell size variance thing#those are moving in the right direction! but only by a fraction of a percentage point#so my endocrinologist says I should maybe go to a hematologist#and idk what to do about that#on a happier note I think I will use the blorbo crochet pattern as a case study to try to explain how I come up with patterns
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There is a really painful self defeating irony in people who gatekeep goth/punk/emo subcultures.
All of these subcultures are pretty broad and fluid and were formed so outcasts can band together, but if there is ONE "rule" if it can even be called such it is to stand against and question authority.
And then you have some someone come in claiming to be an authority on the subject of a group of rebels and starts policing who is allowed in this collective under the impression it's a secret club and not reclaimed words we have adopted that were once used to belittle and suppress us-
My actual sibling in Christ, Lucifer or whatever Gods you do or do not follow HOW have you SO THOROUGHLY missed the point.
You have become the authority you were supposed to rebel against.
#“real” goth/punk/insert subculture here dont gatekeep. support your outcested siblings dont out them down#can we just not apply 'its a spectrum' to things that arent gay or mental illness????#and make no mistake i want these people to realize they are not helping#but i am never going to tell them theyre kicked out of the Secret Club for fucking up and being confused because that is not how we do shit#like also this is a 'i am still wearing these beat up jeans bc im poor and im owning it' ;#i could write an essay on how subcultures and how their fashion was a direct result of ecenomic states of specific decades#people think emo and grunge have both just existed forever and exist in a vacuum and i am????#telling people they have to make all their clothes themselves or theyre a poser is acrually abelist and missing the point#the point is we used ro be made fun of for not having the money to make the right clothes#now your excluding your siblings for not having the time to make it from scratch#homie grunge was the result of 'what was possible for poor people'#and right now it is a lot less affordible and accessible to distress your own jeans than to biy pre distressed plastic that looks like jeans#DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE JEANS ARE???????#like also this is a 'i am wearing beat up stuff and owning it' vs#'inliterally cannot addord to reduce the lifespan of this garment by distressing it'#homie my 2 dollar baby blue shirt made with slave labor i bought on clearence is more 'grunge' by your standards than#the 20 dollar flannel you boyght ar goodwill that is being sold for more than 3 times what it was originally bought for#because no one WANTS to support megacorps but the system were fighting doesnt give us an option.#im not jesus if i have to chose between ethically sourced things (nevermind the reasearch to prove that claim isnt a lie)#and EATING THAT DAY GEUSS THE FUCK WHAT BUTTER CUP IM BYING THE RICE AND THE BLOOD POLYESTER#not buying a shirt isnt an option bc then u get fired from your job and have even less money ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#this is just turning into a other povert awareness rant because most of these groups had fundamental origins in poverty#and people are twisting that history to suit their needs#'uhm AcHkTuAlLy you can just do this alternative to avoid supporting-' eat a dick no i cant#like ask yourself 'would i vibe check a homeless person for doing this?' because one of the problems is like#people assume if you have housing in any capacity you are somehow... actually fine and just mismanaging money???#eljin talks#........i hit the tag limit#i deleted tsgs so i could tag actual subcultures but jk im a fucking coward#sigh you win this time anxiety
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