#learn you a thing

[madfishmonger]

It might seem silly but for some kids and some pets, it really works to make a huge deal out of when they do something right, and not get a lot of attention when they're wrong.

I want to apologize to my friends and family who have children for low key treating their kids like dogs but the standard methods for training dogs are even more effective of them because they actually understand language and are better at reasoning.

Positive reinforcement is amazingly effective, like I saw my nephew poking their cat so I sternly told him no, he stopped and I immediately changed my demeanor and cheerfully told him thank you and how happy I was that he listened to me instead of staying angry at him and he got this strange “Oh…It actually does make a difference wether I’m naughty or not” and later my sister in law asked why he’s so polite around me.

That’s literally what works best on dogs. Let them know when you don’t like what they’re doing but also let them know when you’re happy with them even if that means changing your demeanor on a dime (and even if you’re still a bit mad at them for doing it in the first place).

Oh and little treats. I skipped the aunt phase and is already turning into a grandma who has candy in her pockets for the kiddos for good behavior.

[madfishmonger]

Random life advice

- Don't worry about following fads. The longer you live the more fads you see and the less you care. If the fad is fun and you like it, do it, but if you don't, you don't have to and literally no one cares.

- Talk to yourself like you'd talk to your best friend is the best advice I've ever gotten.

- Keep a couple items from your young childhood out on display because the further you get from childhood the nicer (and harder) it is to remember it

- If someone intentionally makes you vomit, aim for them. They'll never do it again.

- Make your enclosure your happy place. If that's a room or a house or a desk, make it yours. Don't listen to anyone who says things like "but if you paint all the walls not-white someone won't want to buy the house in the future" or "aren't you too old for..." they are Enemies of Happiness.

- Don't be an Enemy of Happiness. Let people like things you don't.

- Life is difficult and painful and will throw horrible things you couldn't ever plan for to make you miserable, so don't make it worse. Be kind. Especially when it's hard. It's worth it in the long run

- Don't say anything behind someone's back (in person or online) that you wouldn't say to their face. This is a tough one, but totally worth the effort.

- Love freely and openly and happily and loudly.

- Stop acting like your preferences are somehow universal and objectively correct. If we were all the same there'd only be one flavour of ice cream. People have wildly different like and dislikes. The customer is always right in matter of taste. Let them be.

- Listen to the elderly and the young and everyone in between. The differences in perspective will keep your mind open.

- You have been wrong, you are wrong about something now, and you will be wrong in the future. Just like every other human in the entire history of humanity. You will not spontaneously combust from admitting you're a mere mortal like the rest of us. Make peace with it.

- You are NOT the exception. You're the statistic. Choose accordingly.

[madfishmonger]

I've just cut and pasted the replies instead of posting all the images and then having to add alt text, but the thread is linked above

"Here's some signs you might be dysregulated: - you struggle to sleep even when exhausted - you instantly feel tears come on when angry or upset - you startle easily - you have 'overreactions' to minor things - crowds overwhelm or scare you - you feel anxious (maybe even plan escape routes) in new environments - you feel fear or panic when you can't control a situation - you use yelling or screaming as a way to protect yourself when you feel threatened Ultimately, we're constantly overstimulated. This makes it difficult for us to focus, to sleep, and to connect with people around us emotionally. Some people raised in this environment are drawn to careers that also are over stimulating. This could be nursing, hospitality, or any environment that is consistently stressful. It's important to make our home environment a place that cues safety to our nervous system. This will send signals to our body that the stress is not constant, and that the nervous system can stabilize. How To Create A Secure Environment: 1. A no screaming policy: screaming by nature sends danger dues to the body. If you live with people, have a policy that if screaming does happen, a break is taken to cool down. 2. Use the song "Weightless" by Marconi Union: this song was created by a professional sound practitioner and a study concluded that it reduced anxiety by 65% in participants with 3 minutes of playtime. 3. Use skin to skin touch: skin to skin touch is a nervous system regulator. Laying in quiet with someone after a stressful day can help the body recover and process the stressful event. 4. Turn down that social invite (if you need to): sometimes when we're overstimulated, we feel like we have to keep going and going. Taking time to rest, to recover, and to just be is important. It might feel uncomfortable before it's relaxing. 5. Get outside: listening to birds, the wind in the trees, and the natural sounds of nature has a calming effect on the entire body. Spend time time in the sun just listening to the world around you. 6. Noise cancelling headphones: if you live in a busy area, or around a lot of people, noise cancelling headphones can help block out the over stimulation, allowing your body to recover. 7. Meditations or soothing voices: use Spotify or YouTube to listen to voices that are soothing and calming for you. Just by hearing a regulated voice, our nervous system will co-regulate. With repeated practice, your body will learn that it can relax and does not have to be on guard. You'll sleep better, have more control over your emotional reactions, and feel overall more at peace."

Dr Nicole LePera

[gibbearish]

love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking

[wishfulsketching]

More of the Silco survives AU! This is part three. Part 1 and Part 2

The girls learn the truth and Silco gets a taste of a monster

[apollos-boyfriend]

“it’s a good thing that the minecraft movie isn’t about the intense loneliness of minecraft’s world and finding growth and hope in a post-apocalyptic society because it’s for children” Have You Ever Spoken To A Child

[0sbrain]

alternatives for ai to design ocs

hero forge

picrew

the fucking sims 4

your local furry artist

bitmoji

shitty photoshoped collage

DeviantArt bases

zepeto

making edits of your favorite character

searching "dress up game" on the app store

learning how to draw

[madfishmonger]

@hobbitron-3000 hiding this goodness in the tags

"The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I'm not a trannie or a fag so I don't care, just give 'em the medicine they need."

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

[amethyst42]

"Keep your plant pots safe and secure." 🪴~rope/art #shorts #

[madfishmonger]

An interesting article with a little hope for the future but also I think some of you worker's rights protesters might be interested in this bit:

A gherao is a kind of protest in which employees refuse to let their managers or superiors leave the workplace until their demands are satisfied. The gherao originated in West Bengal when Subodh Banerjee, who was first labor minister then head of the public works department in the United Front Government of West Bengal in the late 1960s, introduced it as a formal means of protest in the labor sector. The gherao has been deployed time and time again as a tactic to protest against corporations and government actions since then.

[parisoonic]

Well, he didn't say it wasn't mechanically impossible.

[count-pudding]

Wizard Installer🧙✨

[nugulover69]

Encouraging a man to start a union with a flirtatious wink. Miles you are wildin without your wife to reel you in huh

[rameiixo]

another animation exercise, with okarun !

[madfishmonger]

Personal policies I have adopted and they might help you too:

- say what you mean and mean what you say as much as possible

- don't say anything behind someone's back you wouldn't say to their face (including and especially online)

- if someone antagonizes you into throwing up, aim for them.

- assume competence in others first, let them do their thing.

- you have been wrong, you are wrong, and you will be wrong. This applies to all humans across space and time.