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a-tale-of-legends · 1 year ago

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( cracks knuckles) okay let's do this in chunks.

1) Shauna's parents do want their daughter to succeed in life. They don't come from a crazy rich family or let alone a family that can at least live comfortably like Jude and Dante. They see their daughters smarts and see her potential and think " this can get her to live her life comfortably", and thus the active pushing for her to focus on science and technology. But again, it's not what she wants. She wants to go around making memories, but that's not " being productive" and she's " just goofing off". Again, they want the best for their daughter, but I don't think they realize they're weighing her down( she took the voyage by professor Sycamore as an escape tbh).

2) Pokemon is an idealistic world so fortunately we don't have to worry about paying for every romantic site. I do think traveling requires some money in general, but I think Kalos would make it way worse if they reaaaally wanted to. Again fortunately that's not the case!

3) Tierno's "problem" is that he's kinda average. Nothing makes him stand out outside of his dancing. He's not boring- far from it - but he's been put in a place of ' oh I guess I can't do much with my dancing? It's not really important....' which SUCKS LET THIS BOY DANCE. I should mention that most of these comments are coming from the few upper classmen/ rich folk he has met in his life. Yes, it's just the few, but it left a mark on him. ( This honestly can be said about all of kalos. I generally think most people aren't suuuuper strict on their culture around beauty, it's just that there's so many corporations and people in power that are. I think lysandre was a much needed wake up call). And yeah, unfortunately, him being a fat kid does okay into this dismissal of his character. Conventional beauty standards are a bitch, and poor Tierno has probably dealt with his fair share of nasty comments ( bc of this Shauna, Dante and Trevor are much more combative when it comes to any insults thrown towards their friend. They WILL fuck someone up- especially Shauna. )

3) Jude is again another person who is really interesting in this context bc yes, their mom is famous, yes, they have the money to live comfortably in the suburbs of Kalos ( does Grace even work now? I don't know-). But here's the thing. Jude was an orphan. Jude was an orphan in a system that did not treat her kindly. He has seen the systems bullshit in Kanto, and can see it in Kalos - and bc of the whole cultural difference it's kinda like. Whiplash after whiplash. Jude and Grace have only been in each other's lives for....two years by then? Yeah that's a decent amount of time for Jude to get used to their new life style ( and to an extent, they do, they like having their own room lol), but like. It's Jude. They're not gonna forget what came before Jude and doesn't exactly completely fall for their new lavish life style. I think what I'm trying to say that in comparison to Dante, Jude is more.....grounded? Privileged, yes, but also not? I don't know if that makes sense. They still experience what Shauna and the others experience at some level.

4)Going into Dante real quick he's funny bc he's not Rich Rich. He's comfortable rich, which is something not a lot of people can say they are. So I can see it where while he is actively reaping the benefits of his status ( without really being aware of it), he's not totally among the elites, you know? And I think his parents want their son to have good principles and not fall back on his money ( thus resulted in a surprisingly practical and stubborn kid who would rather work hard than have things given to him - unfortunately he does not realize that a lot of things are being given to him-). Again it's interesting bc Dante doesn't want to be known for his money, or his looks ( though he does take care of his appearance), or who parents are and their legacy. He wants to build his legacy by his own hands, which is really admirable. It's like. He's seemingly going against Kalos' values in denying the privilege he's gotten, but he's still actively using said privilege without even knowing it. Does that make sense? I hope it does. It's a very interesting juxtaposition.

Do you have headcanons about Kalos in your AU, that affect Jude, Dante, and the rivals? Familar and new ones alike!

Yeah! I have a few hc's that I hopefully remember -

I know that Kalos has a classism problem, if Team Flare is to show off anything. And also this weird beauty problem, whether or not someone is stylish enough is allowed to enter certain stores. That in particular reaaaally bothers Jude n Shauna lol.

I think the rivals sans Dante and Jude ( kinda) aren't suuuuuuper wealthy. Not exactly poor either, but they don't exactly have the same luxury that Dante has. Shauna was always aware of this really - it's why she's so quick to point out the faults of rich folk in my au. Trevor is aware of this too, but was more focused on making his dead beat parents proud.

I think this focus on beauty in Kalos effected them too. I generally go by the principal that the pokemon world is sooooo much better to live in compared to the real world, but that doesn't mean it doesn't have it's issues. I can see Trevor being used for his smarts like Clemont is- something that he doesn't exactly mind, but I can imagine it's kinda taxing. Shauna is also very smart and her parents are often pushing her to "maximize her potential" but. It isn't her passion. She likes puzzles as a hobby, but nothing worth being a career. It doesn't help that it's not just her parents trying to push her in this direction. It's frustrating, being told to uphold a certain standard that you don't want. And Shauna is a bit of a romantic. She likes all the romantic stuff of Kalos, but having to obtain that is frustrating sometimes. Tierno, I feel, is often overlooked in that regard. He doesn't exactly have exceptional abilities like Trevor or Shauna or Dante. He just likes to dance and dreams of making a dance team. Which. Might not even be considered something worth going into by some. Not all, of course, but the few that do kinda always stuck with Tierno. It didn't help that he didn't exactly come from a rich family so. I think these things played a role in Tierno's self worth really. He doesn't feel like he offers much, or has anything to stand out. His dancing is just dancing- it's not as useful as Trevor's smarts, or Shauna's charm or Dante's battle prowess. So what can he really offer?

Jude is kinda funny in all of this bc Jude is an outsider here. She's from Kanto. She's not used to whatever Kalos is about. So there's always a level of slight annoyance with how things operate in Kalos. Though she's also in a position where she does get the perks of "beauty", so it's. Weird. Dante, on the other hand, has always thrived in Kalos' standards, and never had a problem with it because of that. In a way he kinda isolated his friends out because he never really saw the problem. It's only when his ego got hurt was when he started to really see things for how it is- and even then that took a while bc Lysandre got to him first and kinda warped Dante's ego into working for him( though I should stress Dante didn't know Lysandre was part of team flare, let alone leading it. His job was just to collect mega stones and help Lysandre with some data- but Lysandre did present himself as someone who understood Dante at the time, and that's what Dante really wanted )

Aaaaand yeah. I think that's all I want to say. It was fun to compare how the culture around kalos effects the kiddos!

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papatundespainknife · 2 years ago

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based on the backstory and personalities of the Mikalesons, do you have any headcannons about Mikaelsons + religion?

oh HECKIE YEAH

i think it's honestly SUCH an interesting topic and concept seeing as how their all you know immortals n shit and magics real and etc etc. unlike say, btvs where Willow literally invokes Osiris, tvd doesn't really make any solid references or claims about the whole Deity Situation until apparently legacies but I haven't watched it yet and sounds Kinda Dumb so I'm ignoring that lol. But the rule of thumb with shows like these seems to be that once you say draculas and witches are Super Real then it's open season for Zeus enter stage right like it's an episode of Xena. Which when you look at the Mikaelsons....... Wild.

I think that Freya, Finn and Rebekah are the most unironically straight-forwardly religious and I think they've stuck to the norse/scandinavian beliefs they grew up with. Freya both because of the 1,000 years of Napping Nonsense but also because she's a witch and that's the school she was taught in so she's sticking with it. Finn for similar naptime reasons and also because he doesn't see a reason to change and didn't even when they were in France and hanging out with christians. For Rebekah it's like pure sentimentality. She likes a lot of the aesthetics of mainly catholicism (the swagiest of sects) but at the end of the day she's still out here making offerings to Freya (the goddess not the sister fdjkgdfsdfs) because she's a sappy little sentimental bitch and that's what brings her comfort. I don't think she's particularly religious which I think Freya and Finn are but she enjoys the celebrations and finds comfort in the actions/words/rituals/prayers/etc.

Kol and Elijah are more wiggly in their beliefs. Kol still calls back to his roots a LOT but he's also expanded out over the years since he's still a witch at heart and a curious cat. He's less interested in following any one religion and more in what resonates with him. So his believe system is very eclectic. What he believes in he believes in 10000% and is dead serious about. He's also experimented and educated himself about world religions the most out of all of them. Dude could probably teach a clss tbh.

Elijah is the one who's actually been the closest you can be to an atheist in a world like this. He's had periods of like, religious nihilism and periods were he's a little more hopeful about it. He's just spent so much of his life trying to be the Good Reliable Son and like Niklaus praying for divine intervention both with their father and with Niklaus only to get shit in return that it broke him and he just stopped and abandoned all religion/spirituality and focused only on the tangible. Hope's birth fucking shakes him to the core lol. Generally tho even after her he's still more in the like, "not my scene but i do love a good festivity" camp.

Niklaus is an evangelical's idea of an atheist where it's not "i don't believe in god" but instead "i feel god personally slighted me at my bday party so now i'll hurl rocks at him for the rest of my life out of pure spite". his sense of abandonment, unwantedness and paranoia doesn't stop at the threshold of religion. Ofc, he's old as dirt and literally has his own coven that bitches KEEP FORGETTING HE HAS so he's not in doubt that the divine exists. But Thor didn't protect him from his father's abuse so fuck that guy and jesus didn't fix SHIT for him so equally fuck him.

Wouldn't be shocked tho to see him "ironically" do rites/sacrifices to Odin via shit like the death of an enemy/creatively using old school practices for physical/psychological torture bc he's Like That. Does he also end up carving a mjolnir into Hope's crib and giving her a little one on a necklace? yes but this ain't about that hush.

Kol and Niklaus are also the most likely to have an affinity for gods like Loki and his children for reasons I feel are obvious lol. The holiday arguments this creates between them and Finn are unhinged.

#answered #tvd #mikaelsons #meta #klaus mikaelson #finn mikaelson #kol mikaelson #elijah mikaelson #rebekah mikaelson #freya mikaelson

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mynameisnowwyrm · 4 years ago

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Spoiler warning

TL;DR horrible adaptation, but very enjoyable on it’s own

(Also just wanted to say I was so sure I was going to hate this bc of what’s different but they changed so much the cartoon and the live action are barely connected in my head)

Okay my review will be split up into two parts: fate: the winx saga as an adaptation and as a standalone work

As an adaptation:

0/10. Maybe 0.5 if I’m being generous.

The things that were unchanged from winx club:

There are characters named Bloom, Stella, Musa, Aisha, Sky and Riven

Aisha, Bloom, Stella and Sky resemble their cartoon counterparts

Riven is an asshole

Bloom is a dumbass

Magic exists

The specialists exist

Main characters go to schools for magic and specialists respectively

The dragon flame is a thing

Witches exist

Other than that it’s a completely different show. The plot vaguely resembles season 1 of winx club only in that Bloom is trying to discover her true heritage. Musa, who is supposed to of East Asian descent is not, Flora was not included and in her place is a different character with similar powers, Tecna was excluded entirely ( I believe this was to distance the show from the futuristic elements of winx club and focus only on fantasy, which doesn’t make sense since they changed Musa’s powers ).

The magic system was changed. Fairies don’t on the regular transform since in the show the know-how to do so was lost, though Bloom does unlock the ability in the finale. Instead of each being a fairy of an individual concept, everyone’s powers ale element based, with Musa’s powers being changed to her being an empath. While this does feel more generic, it makes more sense from a world building perspective and I can see why they changed it.

The fashion is horrible. You will never be able to convince me teenagers dress like that. One of the reasons the original cartoon was enjoyable was all the colourful, fun clothing. The clothes feel dated and too mature for the characters, like I can see a twenty-something person in 2013 wear some of those outfits. It especially feels like a missed opportunity since 2000’s fashion is coming back into style.

The characterization of some of the characters compared to winx club was hit and miss. Riven was an ass and Bloom was impulsive and naive, which is accurate, but Stella, oh Stella was a disappointment. Stella was a jealous, manipulative bitch, which in context of her character backstory makes sense, but is so far from her original portrayal. Cartoon Stella was spoiled and at times self centered, but she was also genuinely kind, helpful and bubbly. To see her character take a 180 and become the all too familiar jealous ex archetype was upsetting.

Now, aaaaall that being said, I don’t believe we should judge this as an adaptation. They changed so much that it is quite literally a new story. So let’s see how it stands up on it’s own.

Summary, taken from the wiki

The series tells the story of Alfea, a fictional boarding school where teenagers study. The world inside this universe is not only magical and full of monsters, but it is also a world of real teenagers who do the most common things: make friends and enemies, go out and of course... fall in love. They are eager to find their place in this world. This universe is different from the one we have all known for a long time.

The attention is focused on a group of proud teens, also well-designed female characters. Sometimes they are heroines, sometimes weak girls. Sometimes they are friends, sometimes rivals. Of course, they are not perfect, but they are real. A group of girls who did not know each other until they are included in the same team inside a school that is strange to them. They will meet forces that are beyond their control and things they do not understand. But, throughout the series, they will find themselves, form an indestructible bond, and transform into powerful and strong girls, ready to change not only the supernatural world, but also ours.

Character summary:

Bloom is a newly discovered fairy from the human world who is attending Alfea college in the otherworld. There she meets her new roommates: chatty Terra, athletic Aisha, uptight Stella and stand-offish Musa. She also meets Sky, Stella’s ex, who is training as a specialist.Shortly before coming to Alfea, Bloom discovers she has magic powers by almost burning her house down and killing her parents. She is distraught over this and it is why she is eager to gain control of her powers.It is discovered that Bloom is a changeling, a barbaric practice where a fairy baby is exchanged with a human one. This leads Bloom on a quest to discover her true heritage.

Musa is an empath, she can feel the feelings of everyone around her. To shut them out and escape she listens to music through her headphones. This leads to her initially coming off as uncaring when Terra tries to get to know her better.

Terra is an earth fairy with a particular talent for making plants grow. She is very nice and chatty, eager to make friends, but not afraid to stand up for herself. She struggles with finding someone to like her and compares herself to “cool girl” Beatrix who has boys following after her.

Aisha is a water fairy who swims twice a day every day. She comes off a a good person who wants to make friends and do the right thing. She also tries to do everything in her power to protect her friends.

Stella is a light fairy and princess of Solaria, the realm in which Alfea resides. She is repeating her first year due to an event prior to season one where she lost control of her powers and blinded her best friend. She is very uptight due to her perfectionist mother and tries to exert control in every other area of her life, when this doesn’t work, e.g. when someone flirts with her on-again-off-again boyfriend she gets jealous and causes trouble. She is also generally rude to the people around her.

Sky is a specialist legacy and Stella’s on-again-off-again boyfriend who has an interest in Bloom. His father was a famous specialist and he was raised by his father’s best friend.

Riven is Sky’s roommate, best friend and a genuine asshole. He insults and antagonizes everyone around him and gets involved with Beatrix. He seems dissatisfied with the life of a specialist.

Beatrix is an air fairy with a lightning powers. She seems mysterious and looks to be the villain of the season. She has enlisted the help of Riven and Dane.

Dane is a first year specialist who first seems to be friendly with Terra but gets sidetracked after spending time with Riven and Beatrix.

What I didn’t like:

The world building is sparse and the magic system is generic. I feel like things could have been better expanded upon. Throughout the show they bring up archaic fairy magic but it’s never really explained how that’s different from current fairy magic.

The interactions between Riven and Dane come off as a bit queerbait-y although they could be setting things up for a second season.

Everyone is constantly so rude towards Terra. Even her supposed friends are mean to her. What gives?

Stella was constantly rude to everyone but by the end they are all the best of friends when she really hasn’t changed much. Also Stella being the jealous controlling ex archetype and not enough people calling her out on her bullshit.

What I did like:

For a Netflix teen drama there is surprisingly little sex between the teenagers. This might be subjective but it was refreshing for me.

Again subjective but I could definitely relate to Bloom’s antisocial teen flashbacks

Beatrix was a fun villain

Though the story might be a little generic, I felt it was compelling throughout. I genuinely wanted to know what happened next.

The story was well paced. It never felt like anything was dragging along

Overall:

The show was definitely enjoyable to watch. There is a lot of room for improvement. It sometimes felt like different plot lines were unconnected and the costume choices leave a lot to be desired. Aside from that they set up a solid story and likable characters (some of whom I love love and love to hate) which I very much want to see further developed in the future. As a stand-alone work 6/10

#fate the winx saga #winx club #winx stella #winx bloom #winx sky #winx #winx riven #winx musa #winx terra #bad adaptation #good show #fate the winx saga review #winx review #fate the winx saga spoilers #winx spoilers

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loahnuh · 2 years ago

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First off all Algorithm Generated Images (AGI) are not art, they aren’t even true artificial intelligence, just a sophisticated image compositor that spits out generic, bland, and wonky images created from the stolen data of uncountable numbers of artists just trying to make a living. And that’s what this rant is about, what needs to happen to make AGI’s palatable. Because lets face it, some idiot opened that damn box again and unleashed a new evil unto the world that we mortals now have to live with, and just like with all the other evils of the world we as humanity can come together to minimize the suffering this one is fixing to cause.

First is the problem of data sourcing, obviously scraping public facing art galleries for image data to feed your neural network to train and algorithm is unconscionable. Only poorly socialized sociopaths who hold no value for the hard work and effort that goes into even a humble doodle would do such a thing. So I propose that we start pressuring lawmakers to regulate the AGI industry and open them up to civil if not legal penalties if they are found using images without proper accreditation and compensation. If they are found culpable, they have to pay damages to the afflicted party and DELETE THE ALGORITHM AND ANY EXTANT LEGACY VERSIONS IN THEIR CONTROL, forcing them to start over, a loss of potentially thousands of hours of work. Now I’m not heartless and am willing to grandfather in current AGI programs but if they commit any further infractions they suffer the same fate, and lets face it these soulless dipshits will because they all think they are above the consequences of their actions.

Secondly is the copyright problem, and this one is simple really, AGI’s are not eligible for copyright. Full stop. Just like with monkey photo (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_selfie_copyright_dispute) images generated by an algorithm are not created by humans and therefore in the public domain. Typing a prompt into an image generator no more makes an artist than it makes art, even cleaning up an image after production shouldn’t trigger copyright protections. Unless the work is actually transformative, like say using an AGI as a reference and then producing works off that, IT SHOULD NOT BE ELIGIBLE FOR COPYRIGHT. We can even roll this one into the last one as it will take pressuring lawmakers to make it so.

The final issue of AGI’s is proper accreditation in large works. This one is a little more tricky but I think we have a frame work already in place thanks to the American Human society. If you see the no animals were harmed phrase in the credits of a film then you know there was someone on set scrutinizing the treatment of the animal performers. A similar system could be used, a third party organization that provides oversight and certification that a production used works composed by human artists who were paid fair and competitive wages without crunch. They can work with the unions to ensure that REAL PEOPLE ARE INVOLVED IN THE PRODUCTION OF ART. Absence of this certification means that behind the scenes real artists were cut out entirely, abused, and /or underpaid for their work, unfortunately an issue that has persisted since well before the advent of AGI programs.

Now this is just my fantasy list and I’m sure other out there have other ideas on how to best regulate or outright destroy AGI development, but I do believe it’s too late to slap the lid down on this bitch of an issue and we need to kick into damage control mode. Even if these changes were implemented it would take years to put them into effect in some jurisdictions and undoubtedly bad actors will find workarounds and loop holes in any rule or regulation drafted to combat this scourge.

#Unhinged #Rant #AI Art is Theft #Fuck AI Art

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bookwyrminspiration · 4 years ago

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I was looking at the King Enki wiki page and apparently he got sent to the somnatorium in exile, but.. why? He's a bitch but he's not that bad. He was doing what he thought was best for the dwarves. And shouldnt Nubiti decide what happens to him, not the council?

great question! From what we know about the somnatorium, it's just a place The Council puts people to sleep forever so they don't feel the guilt about killing people--Sophie compares it to death, though the entire point of it is that the people are alive, but only in body. They're never going to wake up and contribute to society to same as a dead person (not that your contributions determine your right to exist, I'm just making a comparison)

His participation and alliance with the Neverseen or whatever they had going on wasn't completely unreasonable. The Black Swan wasn't providing anything to the dwarves and was consistently struggling, so the only real reason he'd have to back them was out of a moral obligation, which he didn't have. He didn't care about the elves or the Black Swan's mission, so as soon as any possible benefit got low enough he cut them off. Though turning to the Neverseen does feel a little like it was more for drama and betrayal than an actual strategic move on his part--which is fine! Just something I noticed. I would have thought after being so disappointed by the Black Swan, he wouldn't trust the Neverseen, as they are also consistently thwarted and run into problems with their plans; their alliance with the ogres fell through for a reason, you know! So having him not just distance himself from the Black Swan but immediately ally himself with the Neverseen feels more valuable for the shock factor and the oh no! How could you! Thing.

but that's off topic! Your ask is about him being sent to the somnatorium. It wasn't a decision just by The Council, it was decided by four of the intelligent species in a multi-species trial (you can see the details on page 775 of Legacy!), as they were all affected by his actions. I feel like it mentions somewhere that Exile is a communal prison that isn't just used by the elves, but I don't know if that's correct. We've have only really seen it used by the Council because we don't see the smaller political things of the other species.

We don't really get a lot of the details--it's all packed into the very very end of Legacy, so I'm making a few guessing. I'm assuming that by associating himself with the Neverseen, King Enki took on all the punishment for their crimes as well. As the Neverseen's goals became his own and he supported them, e was judged not only for the little stunt he pulled in Legacy, but for the general ideology and any actions the Neverseen had taken recently. The Neverseen would be punished for things like murder (assassination?), destruction of property, threatening people, etc. And those are all very serious crimes in the intelligent species' world, so while we have a more human perspective and some major crimes don't have as much of an impact on us emotionally while they're a lot more unbelievable in the elven world.

So my theory is that he's being punished not just for the actions we saw, but for his association in general with the Neverseen, and on top of that their world has a lot more strict policy around laws when they're broken!!

While he was supposedly trying to do what was best for the dwarves, the rest of his actions triumphed over that detail and it was best to punish him in their eyes. As the Neverseen have committed such heinous crimes, he'd be the kind of criminal they wouldn't want to ever deal with again, so they put him to sleep. No risk of escaping when he's constantly sedated, and everyone can rest easy that he isn't dead physically (though functionally he is).

That's how I explain it to myself, at least! I hope that made at least a little sense! But it's a great question and often confusing because the political system is based on Shannon's understanding of human politics while also trying to make it elven and different!

#thank you for your patience with me!!#this post was saved to my drafts for a while and i forgot I was in the middle of answer it #*answering it #but it's a really interesting topic #trying to figuring out elven politics is like a puzzle except half the pieces don't even exist #if that makes sense #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #quil's queries #kotlc enki #king enki #kotlc dwarved #kotlc politics #nonsie

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actias-android · 3 years ago

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Okay, with the caveats that 1. so far I'm calling it a hearttype, but I feel like there's more to be sorted there and so I don't even have a full grasp on what the fuck I'm talking about, 2. I'm notoriously unreliable at doing these in order, and also 3. I probably won't have answers for some of them, why the hell not, right?

So,

1. Hello I'm Mega Man-series robot hearted. Not any specific character, and oddly enough I have different feelings between classic series robots (feels definitely not Me but also Important To Me) and X series reploids (hell of a lot harder to quantify and actually does feel vaguely Me)? So that's a mystery I don't have a ready explanation for.

BUT I'M BOUTTA DUMP ABOUT IT ANYWAY SO HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTTS

When I was a young boy my father took me into the city traumatized the shit out of me repeatedly and I definitely 100% had some kind of copinglink thing going on, because when you're undiagnosed neurodivergent as hell, already conceive of yourself as more like a computer than a child, and have nothing else to hold onto every other weekend when you have to stay at the guy's house with your younger brother, you do the thing that gets you through the days with as much of your sanity intact as you can. In my case this meant fixating REALLY REALLY HARD on the video games we got to rent from Blockbuster, which dates the story like hell but whatever, we know I'm old lmao.

I'm also a traumagenic system of some sort, which I'm being more open about lately, and I am pretty sure that I simultaneously had an alter of Zero in my head because that's just how it is on this bitch of an Earth. It's hard to say because nothing was cleanly delineated and I can't really go back and ask younger-me what was going on. Confusing shit. All I can do is point back and say as much as I've said about it already.

So I forgot about all of that for years and years and years and decided that I felt like learning PixelGameMakerMV so why not make a whole-ass Mega Man fangame to learn, right? One of my friends was like, hey have you heard of The Megas by the way, and I was like, no what's that, and they were like, god Nevi do you live under a rock for real (affectionate), how have you never...look, here, listen to this, and sent me a few tracks off History Repeating (which is a two-album set that covers the entire MM3 soundtrack in retro-vibey rock song format and is SO fucking good, you guys) and I went,

Ah. I feel Things? I have not felt these Things since...oh right, I did in fact feel these Things before, how did I forget that?

(Well, because DID/OSDD is a self-masking covert disorder that can and will use amnesia to protect you from even knowing you have it, and all the times I'd felt these Things were wrapped up ina lost time period, duh.)

(Okay, I'm going to stop making the Things blue because it's a pain on mobile but I think I'm clever to have color-coded the Things.)

Soon after starting making my game, which is ongoing by the way! I'm really making it and it's a cool feeling!, I realized that I haven't actually played all of the classic Mega Man games I'm cribbing from, which is a fucking crime, right? So I bought the entire Legacy Collections for that and MMX on Switch, since it was Cyber Monday, I was at my mom's place visiting, and I really wanted to get SOMETHING on sale.

The more I have played through them, the more I'm like, ah. This is also Me somehow. Not any specific character onscreen, though Proto Man is probably closest. (Did you know in college there was a time period that people were calling me that because I had a cool red and gray jacket, which wasn't enough alone, but then the Student Center had a big factory reject box sale, and I lucked into a perfectly good bright yellow cashmere scarf for a whole fivebux? Now you know. There was a definite resemblance.)

But then looking at background characters in the X series, I feel it a whole lot more strongly. Less 'this explains something about me' and more 'this EXPLAINS something about me,' but what exactly, I have no idea yet! Is this a psychological thing? A metaphysical thing? Is there that much of a difference when you're a multiple fae witch already? Mehhh???

So yeah I don't know. Maybe answering questions about it for a month will be enlightening, or at least everyone can watch me question something I've claimed in the past to "not believe in*," which is exactly the kind of poetic justice I deserve for having been kind of a jerk about it, if only in my own head.

*Obviously this is not the case now. I have since decided that gatekeeping is stupid in general and if you put in the thought and came to the conclusion, I kinda don't care a ton what the conclusion is, because what it is is your conclusion, based off your experiences, and it doesn't matter a bit if I "get it" or not. But I also do it get it a lot more than I used to, because I had my head on sideways basically and that's no way to go through the world.

#30 day fictionkin challenge #otherkin #nonhuman #no idea if all the responses will be this long #probably not lol but probably for the better anyway

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disruptivebychoice · 5 years ago

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The Eulogy of Last Night

First try

1:06 AM

I tried to write

Thinking that the formation

Would do just that.

Become words to flow

The feelings said with explanation

But as I typed

I realized

I forgot how to write

Second try

1:15 AM

I’ve been sitting here wondering

How long does it take?

For tears to run out

I’ve been sitting here all night

I can’t stop the water

That continues to flow

Maybe if there’s enough

The sadness could take my life

With tears to drown

Mumbling under sobs

To take me now

As my insides scream

How can I escape the thoughts that pound

But it was all a misunderstanding

I tell myself

That left me voiceless

Choked and hopeless

Third try

1:43 AM

Do I run to a vice

Because I can’t even make myself feel alright

But a shy smile was found

As I realized,

Against inspiration

Facing the block of creation

I took my own advice

I decided to write

Fourth Try

1:56 AM

I can’t even let myself out

This mind traps

A labyrinth with a never-ending door

Desperate to get out

Banging hopelessly against steel

Until my hands became bruised and sore

My body couldn’t take it any more

I slid as an angel fallen.

Broken.

Curled on the floor.

Fifth try

2:10 AM

I was thinking about train tracks

How I could write

Leave a legacy

To disappear into moonlight

Where the speed of a train

Could take away my pain

This might be understood

Or come off insane

It lies within

The mindset to live

The mindset to die

What spectrum is it that I lie?

Last try

2:35 AM

Avoidance.

What a bitch.

My mind loves me

Enough to glitch

When the memories pour

My instinct tells me ignore

Stop thinking of the past

Go to a place that’s vast

My heart has too much hurt

It knows too well how to numb

Because it’s permanent state

Was ruined by fate.

Avoidance.

Something told me to write

But naturally it was a feeling

I wanted to fight

Repetition spoke loud

In rhymes of lines

The goodbye I wanted

The ending to all sound

Shame.

I just want to leave my own heart

Maybe then my mind would forget

What tore me apart

This brings me to today

5:32 PM

As I reread what I wrote

I saw something I hadn’t realized

I defied my mind

It’s power that comes about sometimes

Convincing me that neglect is easy

I can con my body into not feeling

With a chuckle made of laughter

I found myself begin to stare

Blankly against the matter

Snapping back to a phenomenon

Thinking to myself,

Wow.

Last night I chose to face the avoidance

With thoughts written concluded as violence

I used will to accept

Not fight

The urge to neglect

As I allowed the fears

To collect as tears

Finding the confusion

Against trying to make sense

The rawness that this discomfort became

Made me human

Senseless

I found it to be beautiful

That our bodies can feel

Emotions so intense

As the factors that makes us real

The way that when feeling

With a mind and heart

Takes away the numbing

From a body that desires belonging

As my words fought with the fright

I did my best to write

My mind sometimes takes me

To an awful place

Where Brainwaves travel

With Ideations to unravel

Maybe the inability to make sense

Is humanity

Our inner truth, our beauty

My conclusion

My mind isn’t perfect

The chemistry is probably unbalanced

My moods shift at a rapid rate

Sometimes tears fall down my face

Breakdowns happen,

Panic more than often

Takes over my system

But instead of finding the why

OR neglecting the try

Last night I chose,

To lay there in a hopeless cry

You see.

thoughts are what make a mind

The body and the heart are what make them come alive

For this power I can’t define

The three must coincide

Not working for or against

But together as a force of inside

That even with these moments that I have

Like last night, where insanity went mad

I won the battle

By choosing me.

The bad the ugly,

Letting flashbacks repeat

Some might call that defeat

In fact there are those

Who will tell you

Keep it together, don’t cry

But what I’ve concluded

Is that it’s the biggest lie

The lie we can choose to give into

So we don’t have to try

Knowing our bodies will oblige...

Today I realized

Writing keeps me alive

#poeticstories #poetryportal #writerscreed #twcpoem #writtenconsiderations #creedatelier #poetrycreed #new poets society #poetry #my words #my poem

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blushing-starker · 5 years ago

Text

Listen. I know it's been done before. But @starkermoodboards and I were sighing dreamily at starker when I had a miniature epiphany. A lot of content revolves around Peter being mafia boss Tony's lover and not taking part in the illegal business, and I am here for it. It's an amazing concept that I appreciate wholeheartedly. I just decided to shift the dynamic and see how it played out.

The man who runs the sandwich shop can't pay up because his daughter had a rollerblading accident? No problem, Peter will leave her flowers, fill the hospital room with teddy bears and extend the due date. You missed the meeting because pay day came in from the day job and you blew it on beer and cocaine? The kid, usually seen smiling and laughing with nearly everyone, doesn't appear all that threatening. Barnes does. But then this beanpole from Queens decks you so hard two teeth go flying. Consider the due date changed. There are now twelve hours on the clock before Peter comes by to collect. Hiding makes it worse. Tony's enforcers, particularly Peter, Clint, Wade and Pietro, love when people run for cover. It helps keep them in shape and breaks the routine.

But then a new boss rolls into town, a so called Killian (Iron Man 3, I can't remember the name) that tries to steal Pepper and his customers. None leave Tony, of course. Those with small businesses, the little guys, appreciate how compassionate Iron Man is. Even the people that often see Peter's knuckles up close don't turn on him; the prices are extremely fair and the Starks' always go through with the deals. So this peacock decides to challenge Tony for the throne. It's a political suicide, a new comer daring to impose upon such an honorable house. Not only that, Tony's been in Queens for decades and he's never once betrayed those that were loyal to him. The man had helped the city become a thriving community, often offering assistance to the people while the government's hands were tied. To challenge Tony was to challenge the principles of the entire system. Thing is, it was technically allowed.

The laws state that any person who believes they have fair reason to challenge another member may do so only if the ensuing fight is overseen by the council. There is no room for competitors to initiate wars based on faux insults. Tony couldn't take out Killian's safe house as retaliation for the challenge. Killian was unable to bomb the Stark headquarters to establish dominance. It was the mafia, not an anarchic society. There was order to these types of things.

Peter arrives early with the team, sweeping the area and making sure the ring hides no lethal secrets. He's been to plenty of these fights, but Tony hasn't been challenged in nearly two decades and the man almost never has to fight someone when there are bodyguards to be found everywhere. Nonetheless, the older enforcers can easily recall the last time Anthony Stark was in the ring and they assure the young man Killian will be out like a light after the boss steps in. They wait, silent and solemn, eyeing the competition for any threats or tricks. The men on the other side are from neighboring cities, names hazy but reputations sparkling. There will be no illusions today. Except from the jester with slicked back hair and a haughty attitude.

The insults rain down and they don't flinch. This behavior is inappropriate, for there is honor among thieves and devils. If one is to seriously fight, one keeps quiet and stays with their own. Most fights that occur between opposing families are mere squabbles, friendly rivalries that keep the atmosphere thrumming during boring weekends or holidays. Barnes has a hobby of coaching Steve in the ring after work and Natasha tends to employ her knife throwing skills against Clint's bow and arrow. They would fight members of the same family for fun, for fuck's sake. But no matter the cause or how drunk people were, insults were looked down upon.

It starts with their abilities as enforcers. Peter stares straight ahead at the wall, they all do. The Stark members were considered some of the fiercest fighters by the community, matched only by the legendary Black Panthers. The little boy criticising their skills does not know how in the wrong he is. But he's a quick learner. The tone shifts slowly, and shift it does. Ten minutes before Tony arrives, his rival begins claiming how incompetent and worthless he is. That makes every person grind their teeth simultaneously.

Whether or not you were a member of the Starks did not matter. It was clear Iron Man was an efficient leader ready to help the entire city evolve into something better. So when Killian leans towards Peter, boasting how he'd do a much better job of ruling, him, a nobody that can't even follow the protocols, the kid very nearly rips him a new one. But that is not allowed and a Stark enforcer does not break a law unless absolutely necessary. He would not bring dishonor upon his job, his fellow coworkers, his family; he would not tarnish the Stark name, let alone allow this weakling to get the better of him. Peter loves Tony and he'd let Bucky put a bullet in him if he ever harmed his boyfriend in any way. Not only had Tony saved his life, he'd shown Peter a better reality that let him thrive. He'd shown the young man how to love himself. Taught him he could be loved by another without anguish souring the relationship.

He was Tony Stark's right hand man, one of the best bodyguards in the mafia. Not just a powerful enforcer either. Peter was more than a Stark; he was the goddamn Spider and that meant something here. Before Stark dropped into his life like a fallen angel, Peter Parker ruled the ring. They considered Ben Parker's nephew a legend years ago, a warrior that could go head to head with the best without dying. Fighting against people like Black Widow and the Winter Soldier had earned him his reputation. Every knocked out tooth, jagged scar and black eye made it clear to all: he was a menace unwilling to break for anyone. Becoming Tony's lover and enforcer only resulted in more respect, but the community hadn't viewed Peter as strong for the first time when he exchanged kisses with the Iron Man. They realized the kid was strong the second he looked Bucky in the eye and grinned at the challenge.

(Peter guessed that's why they get along so great. Buck was a puppy. A lethal one that could rip your arm out, but still a puppy to him. The older of the two appreciated being seen as more than just a good fighter.)

Peter vows not to break. And then Killian is claiming he could breed Tony's bitch, show Peter how a real man fucks. The man gets so close he tastes the spit that comes flying two seconds later.

"Tony Stark is unworthy of his seat. And he sure as hell doesn't deserve such a pretty little thing like you."

It's sneered at him, Killian smirking at him wildly. The whole place changes, white tiles morphing into shades of red and Peter wants.

Barnes snarls at Tony's rival with eyes gone dark, Natasha lets out a hiss reminding him of rattlesnakes and the two russian speakers pounce at the same time. If Clint and Steve weren't so attuned to their family and strong as hell, Killian would be sliced ribbons decorating the floor. All in all, a fairly restrained reaction. Peter's proud of Nat and Bucky for not killing the man on the spot. Makes a mental note to get them new punching bags and cover Clint and Steve's shifts should they need the extra hours.

Killian doesn't move from his spot when the room becomes alive with furious shouts of indignation and Peter has to admit it's impressive. But this is a child, and children respond best to the monsters hiding in the closet, not the ones standing in the light. So Peter thinks about the audacity this creature has, insulting his lover, criticising decades of hard work and dedication, diminishing their relationship and in the process implying that his fellow enforcers were just pieces of meat to satisfy lust, inadequate at their jobs. For to attempt to dishonor or belittle one enforcer meant questioning everyone's competency. Not only that, this scum thought Peter was nothing but a whore. He hadn't fought enhanced assassins just so an arrogant dick would take one look at him and dismiss him as a threat.

Peter doesn't raise a hand or growl or yell or shoot him. He could, the council would see it as fair. After all, Killian had insulted all aspects of Peter's life. Doing any of that wouldn't lead to Killian being beaten, though. And Peter wants him to submit. So Peter smiles and the Spider comes out to play.

By the time Tony arrives, his baby has two buttons undone and a single strand of hair out of place from where he stands in the ring. He knows an enraged Peter when he sees it.

The crowd parts for him, bowing slightly and falling quiet. Only the bosses held in high esteem get such a treatment and it's been years since the community behaved in such a way towards him. The Stark heir was arrogant, but he'd always preferred that the people's respect be shown in a different way, one more subtle.

The bowing reminded him too much of his father's reign, the silence that would engulf him as a child and choke the air out of his lungs with the pressure of Howard Stark's legacy. No matter where they went, the roar of nothing followed. Besides, he was always trying to remind the community that they were all equals. Tony was only in his position because of the people that chose him, the people with the actual power.

So for them to actually bow as low as possible and simply cease conversing, knowing how much Tony abhors the sight, it tells him just how deeply Killian fucked up.

By the hate found in Barnes' face and Nat's curled fist, his rival must have hit a little too close to home. But the man was still alive, leaning against a marble column. Which meant Peter, his genius lover, had somehow initiated a course of action that would lead to satisfaction for all those here. The mafia was made up of untamed creatures. For a hundred people to agree not to rip an intruder's throat when the man had so obviously comitted a heinous act, Peter must have pulled out the big guns.

He settles next to Steve, but all his enforcers surround him anyway. In fact, every person in their side of the room shifts closer. It warms his heart. He'll let them break Killian when this is done, show his appreciation for their care and protection.

Well. If Peter actually leaves something to break.

A body slides out of the ring, ends up at his feet. It's a man the size of Thor, someone living two cities over. The tattoos on his right hand are what clue Tony in. Peter's played fair. The guy will need all his teeth replaced and that scar will definitely make a lovely crisscross pattern on his face. Bruce and Strange are already there, dragging him to a corner filled with more groaning bodies and hard working nurses disinfecting wounds. Each man will showcase those scars proudly. They went against the Spider and lived to tell the tale with proof right on their bodies.

He counts ten. Turns to find Peter staring at him, expressionless face morphing into the one he's most familiar again. A grin confirms his suspicion; his darling isn't even sporting a bloody lip. The grin he gives in return appears instinctively, pride overflowing and resulting in Tony Stark beaming at the Spider. It's both unsettling and a relief. The community was used to a happy Peter so the interaction helped remind them who the Spider was. That familiar sense of comfort vanished because Jesus, Tony Stark was beaming.

"Feeling merciful, sweetheart? Giving them a minute is twenty times longer than usual." His tone is light, not wanting to imply Peter has gotten slow or rusty. Sure, it's been a while since his boyfriend was in the ring, but you don't offend the Spider when he's already in a bad mood.

Steve and Bucky tense up, eyeing Peter in case they need to fight him out of the ring. If he gets even more pissed, Killian's men don't stand a chance. Tony could stomach murder. Peter couldn't. The enhanced soldiers prefer the possibility of bruised ribs to Peter with a heavy conscience.

His boyfriend doesn't twitch and Tony thanks whatever entity exists for giving Peter some self control.

"Figured it'd be best I don't get the suit too dirty. May is always complaining about getting the blood stains out. It hurts her hands so I'm trying to help out. If I take the jacket off, the shirt will stain faster."

God, Peter could really pull at his heartstrings without meaning to. He falls in love with him a little more.

The eleventh man tries to catch Peter and tackle him to the ground. The kid just slides to the right, drops down, sweeps the guy off his feet and knocks him out with two punches. It's the loveliest thing Tony's fucking seen and he's thankful Jarvis is taking pictures. He settles the sunglasses onto his lapel, happy to let the A.I immortalize this moment from that vantage point.

"I'm gonna guess what's going on and you'll stop me if I'm wrong, right?" Peter nods and Tony is ridiculously happy for the chance to do this in front of Killian.

He glances at Nat, sizes up Barnes, reads Peter's posture and Steve's facial cues and just knows.

His father used to hate when his only child pointed at things before analysing them. Found it too mundane, or some shit like that. Tony makes sure to point at Killian with both index fingers.

"You were disrespectful to my people. That's common with you. They shouldn't take anyone's insults, but they can and they did. The council probably thinks they were exemplary, hell, Fury probably thinks they were the textbook definition of good. But you kept pushing. Just poking at their buttons. Because it's Peter in the ring, you're little stunt turned personal. You insulted him, his family, me. If it had been one of the others members, Peter would have cut you a nice scar. But tradition is tradition. Even if he could have challenged you, which he could have, Peter would have stepped aside in that case. The recipient of the insult should have a role in the fight. You pissed him off before I got here. Thought he was weak. The last person to be that naive learned how ridiculous that assumption was when Peter beat their ass."

Peter had knocked Tony flat on his back when he'd made a comment about frail sheltered boys not knowing how to fight. He hadn't seen the kid fight before that; hadn't processed the fact that soft looking Peter Parker was the menacing Spider. That was two years ago. Not a single soul has thought Peter weak since then. Until now.

"The law states your men can take your place against your rival. Which is honorable if you're at a disadvantage. Broken bones, flu, life handing you shit right before the day of the fight. It isn't really put in practice, though, because the council knows how hard it is for everyone to synchronize their schedules for a second round if there are problems. They plan weeks ahead of time to ensure participants are in perfect condition. You seem to be just fine. Putting your men in danger by having them take your place against Peter just for the hell of it, just so you survive, sounds like what an idiot boss would do. If you had courage, you'd fight Peter. You'd fight me, but I doubt you're man enough."

The taunting does its work. Tony knows Peter can just knock him out before Killian even gets close. He could switch with his lover, but Peter needed to establish his reputation once again, make it impossible for any to doubt his abilities. By saying Killian is a coward, the Stark heir challenges his claim of being good enough for the throne. No mafia member would accept his reign if they knew Killian lacked bravery. Well. They already knew this, it just needed to be finalized so the council could have it all in record.

The man has just witnessed what happened when Peter wished for destruction and justice. He could get in the ring, be knocked out and none would laugh. The community would talk about it, but they never mocked the loser. Killian would be seen as an incompetent asshole that at least had courage. If he refused…

Every Stark enforcer/member grinned when the peacock snarled and entered the ring. Until a butterfly knife gleamed and slashed through wool, cotton and flesh.

It feels odd, being stabbed. You'd think the cold blade would send goosebumps everywhere, but Peter doesn't register the cold. Would he be cold if the blade was bigger? Or if Killian hadn't been holding the knife for an hour? He knows his reaction is ridiculous. Who the fuck was wondering about the temperature when they had a knife piercing their abdomen?

Although, it could be the shock. Yeah, he remembers Bruce's lessons on the effects of stabbing. Natasha had also reminded him of the shock, so at least that's a normal symptom. What isn't normal are his other ... responses to being stabbed.

"Are you gonna need this back?" is asked sweetly, nearly sickly so. The Spider has a thing for contrasting aesthetics . Being a little shit while a knife is rearranging his intestines does not sound common, but Peter takes pleasure in behaving oddly.

Killian gapes at him, mouth wide and eyes wider. He shakes his head, careful not to jostle Peter too much. Not like it matters much. There's a metal arm dragging him to safety, sliding over the ring's edge and onto a stretcher. Bucky is being as gentle as possible, he knows. It still feels horrible to move and have the knife shift in time with his breathing. Nat is there to rip open the suit, nails clearing the area around the intrusion and Doctor Strange appearing with antiseptic and everything Peter needs. He loves the Doctor.

And yes, definitely in shock. As he's being wheeled away to the med corner, there's a roar similar to that of a lion and Peter catches sight of Tony leaping at Killian. His clothes, jacket, vest, shirt and wife beater lay in a heap by Steve. Tony's expensive shoes are guarded by Sam. The shoemaker was a nice woman. She bought him a churro once. After that, his boyfriend would always buy his shoes at her store. Peter appreciated Tony helping out the little people. It was nice being what society thought was a bad guy while not actually being a bad guy. Like capitalist loving jerks like Brad. The room's spinning a bit and oh look, sparkly lights.

Afterwards, Jarvis shows him pictures of Killian, explains how the man landed in prison five days after the fight. The council had convened with their counterparts from five different cities. All had tales of Killian's horrible behavior. It wasn't hard to call in a few favors and dump him in jail. It was a bit hard to recognize him, though. Tony had gone berserk and no self respecting person was going into the ring to drag him off his rival.

Killian played dirty, so his boyfriend had first claim to fight while Peter was being treated. Steve and Bucky only hauled him away when five minutes had passed, not wanting their boss to have more blood on his hands.

Peter himself only remembers the dull sting of a needle meant to calm him, Nat's gentle cooing and Sam wiping away the sweat near a disheveled curl. Bruce and Strange had murmured assurances during all of it, careful to work on Peter away from Tony's eyes. If Iron Man thought he'd lose his lover, Killian would've been dead in two minutes.

He'd woken up a few hours later, Tony sitting by his side and sobbing. His boyfriend was sniffling as he wrapped Peter's hand in bandages. Apart from the new scar on his stomach, only his knuckles were slightly bruised. Even so, the mafia's most efficient leader was tenderly applying antibiotic cream to the tiny nicks, letting enough space between bandage and skin for the area to breathe. Tony had never once been violent with him, but Peter thinks this is the first time he's seen his boyfriend be so gentle.

The angle was odd and uncomfortable with him being unable to bend much at the waist. That didn't stop the legendary Spider from kissing Iron Man softly, barely there whispers filling the centimetres between them.

"I love you, Tony. And I'd do it all over again for you. I love you, I love you, I love you 3000.

Alright, here we go! My mind associated Killian's body with Yinsen's name and I've no idea why, but here's the correct version.

#starker #my moodboards #ironspider #peter parker #peter parker x tony stark #peter x tony #tony stark #dark!tony #Dark!Peter #Mob boss!Tony #Enforcer!Peter #Enforcer!Steve #Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #Enforcers!Avengers #Dark!Starker

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lgcyonghwa · 5 years ago

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happy anniversary!

warning: this post is LONG AF! next year i am so not gonna do this - will make a graphic or something instead - because i legit typed for hours. don’t feel obligated to read the whole thing - feel free to scroll down to the sections where you are mentioned.

holy ravioli, i can’t believe legacy is turning one! the last year was chaotic for me real life wise and legacy provided a great place to escape and enjoy writing with my friends. i chatted with so many of you wonderful people and have no doubt i’ll be missing some on this list. if i happen to skip you by accident, just know i love you anyway.

both of my muses went through a lot. yonghwa i’ve had since the very beginning and his journey did turn out differently than i expected. i created him to be perfect on the outside, slowly rotting on the inside. he has a lot of insecurities that he refuse to acknowledge and a crippling greed for money...to the point i legit created a list of free stuff available at legacy and still track his earning. he ended up not deteriorating horribly as i expected due to having an overwhelmingly strong support system. dang it, y’all, i wanted to fuck up my character.

as for daehyung, he’s proven to be the ticking time bomb comedic relief asshole that everyone can’t help but respect for not having his ass kicked out of the company already love - he’ll continue to be a pest and harass people that he find fancy in. career wise, i am surprised he is doing so well despite hating the world and most of the people in it. guess deep down inside he actually cares about acting and finds joy in it. one day, hopefully, he’ll be singing his own ost.

i would like to thank our cute sara, who played yonghwa’s brother @lgcyoon and currently plays @lgcseojin and @lgchana~ sara was one of the first people i plotted with at legacy and i really enjoyed the friendship between seojin & yonghwa. seojin was an adorable tsundere pupper and yonghwa is over-affectionate and secretly appreciated. they had their ups and downs and in season 2 of the future dreams, that really came out. i am glad they were able to work through their issues and i think that is why their friendship feels so believable to him. seojin also had a part in daehyung’s life...can we get that communal shower yet, buddy? yoon, though you are too busy to play him now, will always be yonghwa’s doting older brother. i don’t think i’ll put up that wanted connection again because yoon is so perfect and yonghwa already latched onto him with both legs and arms.

second up, i gotta thank my girl gabby for always being there. @lgcparkdohyun and yonghwa’s brotherly bond is incredibly strong and in fact, one of my best plots to date. we’ve essentially plotted them out from diaper days and they are as close as two guys could be without screwing each other, really. we’ve also been here since the beginning together and high fives man, our boys technically both made it.

@lgcxcharlie is yonghwa’s supportive girlfriend and she is so adorable. a much needed ray of light in his life. funny thing is that they met a long time ago, via bread. did charlie know that she’ll end up getting a boyfriend out of her kind bread donation? see, this is what happens when you feed a hungry cat - he’ll keep following you for more. now you are just going to have to keep him~

for my beloved rose who plays @lgcjude, @lgcjina and @lgcwon, i love youuu. with them on tour together and sharing a room, i hope jude is not annoyed yet by the fact yonghwa keeps on climbing into his bed. as for jina - hello, fellow season one winner, high fives. they might have to keep some distance due to opposite gender, but at least they’ll always have that respect for each other. now won, sorry, the devil is never letting you gooooooo. he’ll continue to harass you for years to come.

@lgcseolmi + @lgcichika & @lgckit - my typo queen nam~ we haven’t known each other for very long but damn did you rise quickly on my favoritism list. i love you lots, even though you are a dork who can’t spell anything right! :3c we’ve threaded already with the girls and now i am waiting for the new baby boy!

my al is the best person for cat gifs ever. every so often, i’d get a cute gif and feel my happiness grow. in fact, like we talked before, you send me so many cat pics that i believe you are a cat and will treat you like one. pet pet pet pet! @lgcinsoo and @lgcyue are both great babies, but you know i have bias towards our insoo. he is such a kind, loving puppy and both of my characters appreciate him. one more obviously than the other.

em, how the hell do you post so fast even though you got three characters? also, how on the earth have we managed to talk so long without doing a single thread together? oh wait, shoot, it is me isn’t it? @lgcaaron is still waiting on his starter and my ass typed this long af thank you note instead of that hohoho-

i still have so many boys i want to interact with for the project origin group but those i’ve already had a chance to thread with, i’ve all loved. our @lgcxpv is a wild child but so precious in yonghwa’s eyes. we’ll always have their shower scene to reflect back on. also, your precious max is one of dae’s only semi-acknowledged friends. our @lgcxhaneul is the sweet mandu that will keep on getting squished by his loving hyung. we love @lgcseul who deserves all the hugs and @lgcminjun, who will definitely become one of yonghwa’s favorites. @lgcjiho & @lgcharu are both soft cute boys that i am still planning on hitting up more.

though we’ve only had one thread, i strangely really enjoyed the interaction between yonghwa and @lgceunho. i feel like they still have more to explore and hopefully will find themselves together in a future event!

also jia, we’ve been around since the very beginning too. i miss writing together. @lgchyunjin should come and love on yonghwa more. ; v ; we are the early day boys ya knowwwww. i enjoyed chatting with you on twitter, can always count on you to be around liking people’s posts to show support.

lately, i’ve also gotten to plot with @lgcsubin, who is a sensitive boy with depth. i love his character and i hope to write more with you, nic! also, thanks for being around and asking what’s wrong whenever people are upset. i think it is so precious.

stef, i am so glad you joined legacy and see, it is fun, right? daehyung will continue to bully @lgcxjunghwan but he does it in an affectionate way, alright? love to lulu ( @lgcminseok) & simone (@lgctee) for always being there to chat about stuff~

jen, thanks for teaching me how to gif. i’ve enjoyed our chats via discord and we should do it again sometimes KEKEKEKEKE @lgcxjinah and @lgcxjongsuk both have their places on my character’s heart - i love them both!

here, i just want to acknowledge some of the people that dropped but still had a huge impact on yonghwa’s life. i don’t know how many of y’all will remember them, but back in the day, yonghwa had a best friend called kiyoung and a crush on yujin. when those two dropped at the same time, oh, that was a huge blow. thank them both for being a part of his life. also, jane was a heavy loss for me because i adore her quirkiness. bobby come back, you can blame it all on me.

lastly, i want to thank all of the mods for their hard working maintaining the rp! thanks so much, legacy wouldn’t be fun without you!

for the head admins, i have a few extra blurbs because we’ve been together for a whole year. for our admin l, you’ve worked hard. it is not easy to run events and i feel like i’ve definitely pushed you with some difficult questions before. i am glad we are friends and get to chat often about random tidbits. i am also happy you are taking time for yourself and taking care of real life concerns. your wellness is always the priority! character wise, i have a feeling @lgcmiso and daehyung will actually get along well~

marie because i can’t even remember what is your official admin letter OTL i just remember you as the mother of merlin and writer of @lgcxking. it is not like i don’t like jin, but that king is the one i had the most threads with. i really love yonghwa and king interaction because in a place where everyone must be civil and friendly, their hate for each other is so damn refreshing. i still think five years from now on they’ll be friends, but not before trying to claw out each other’s eyeballs first over their smutty fanfics. sorry for keep harassing hyuncheol and calling him papi, please continue to feed me merlin content. he is the best boy.

FINALLY admin g our grace you are so awesome. i can always count on you to hear me bitch for the two minutes before my angy fade and for last minute cramming. on the week before date lottery is due and i am wailing pathetically for my points, grace is always here to pull through! @lgchanbyul and yonghwa as on screen couple is actually pretty adorbs. also @lgcjaesun, thanks for dealing with daehyung as a dorm mate. the devil is gone now but his influence will always be there

i have so many more people i want to mention but only so much time. just know i appreciate everyone. thanks for a great year, hopefully there’ll be many more!

#tried my best #did not tag everyone by all of their characters #i love everyone and happy 1 yr #lgc:anniversary

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woeismyhoe · 5 years ago

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Spill the tea, what's the deal with you and the BSG group (avatar-chang and her squad in particular)?

Ok anon, sorry for taking so long! I wanted to get everything right and honestly collecting the posts took a longass time xD

Anyways, the only ones I have a problem there are avatar-chang, hexful/dykesia/bizukos, catrademption, cardboardseagulls (never seen interacted b4) and bizulas (also never interacted b4).

I’m going to be really transparent about this whole thing so it’s gonna be long as there’s gonna be several links and I’ve included the dates so it’ll be easier to understand. Since I’ll be fully transparent about this, i’ll probably get hate or whatever. Honestly, I just want to put everything out there without being biased or hiding anything. I’m going to disclose everything here.

So, the whole thing between me and avatar-chang started off with this post I made last year on 10 March 2019. Afterwards, she PMed me on the same day and this was the conversation:

After that, I thought the argument was over because she blocked me lmao. The only ones I spoke to about this was nbw and my real life friends (who had nothing to do with ATLA lmao I just ranted to them).

And then the next incident I think was on 16 March 2019 when I made this post about Azula’s abuse of her friends. I was new and 16. I genuinely wanted to know why people labeled Azula as an abuser. It was dykesia who responded to me at the time.

Now, unlike avatar-chang, I had a few conversations with dykesia (who was bizukos then) that was generally civil. I first interacted with her when she made a post calling out Zucest shippers or something?? I was very new. Like fresh newbie baby ATLA tumblr fan new lmao so I thought what she said was too aggressive. I didn’t realize that there were actual Zucest shippers until after some time. And then she PMed me on 13 March 2019, saying that she doesn’t always agree on characters with me but I do write some interesting pieces on Azula— that she’s a huge fan of Azula but she just tends to stay away from her fandom. I apologized about the previous incident of the Zucest thing and it was fine after then. We talked about zuko, the fandom, the comics, Mai etc etc. I thought we were on fine terms.

And then I made a post about the cliff scene in the comics on 16 March 2019. Avatar-Chang made a post that was pretty directed at the post but it seems like she’s deleted it.

On 17 March 2019, I received an anon mail telling me that avatar-chang was talking shit about me behind my back. I censored her name then because I didn’t want to believe without any evidence. No one sent me any screenshots about it so I just dismissed it.

On the same day, avatar-chang answered an anon and talked about the 13 child post theory I made on 9 March.

On 23 April 2019, I received another anon mail about avatar-chang, asking if I’d seen the post she made about Azula. I censored her name again cuz I didn’t want to start any shit over having differing opinions. I’m assuming this is the post the anon was referring to.

On 28 April 2019, dykesia/hexful/bizukos PMed me to ask if I was talking shit about other people behind their backs, and her. I denied this because I hadn’t. This was how the conversation went:

Yes, I didn’t censor any name because as I said, full transparency. I have afp blocked because we’ve clashed several times and he’d still come for my posts last year despite already being blocked. If you’ve followed me long enough, you probably would’ve rmbered that time lmao

Anyways during then, I don’t think I realized that dykesia was actually being passive aggressive. It’d been barely a year since I started the blog and I just didn’t want to full out make enemies. Reading the messages now tho lmao she really was passive aggressive. But yeah then she said this in bsg so I don’t even know why she bothered to ask me if she wasn’t even going to consider believing me.

The 9th of June 2019 was the last time she messaged and it was to ask if I mind her discoursing this Zuko post while ‘hard and drunk’. It was the first time she could apparently agree with me so it was I quote a ‘Yay??’. Afterwards I don’t know when she did it but she blocked me lmao

On 17 July 2019, I received another anon mail telling me that avatar-chang publicly called me a bitch when she was answering an anon about me posting the scans of the EK Chronicles. She mentioned this in bsg again on 19 April 2020 lmao (she’s that petty) it seems:

On November 8 2019, an anon (one of avatar-chang’s friends actually) asked about my thoughts towards the allegations against Aaron Ehasz. I still believe in the system of ‘Innocent before proven guilty’, so I didn’t side with anyone. I tried to be as objective as possible. When I said that I hoped men would also come forward, I said that because I don’t want men to just sit on the sidelines and let the women get the heat if they were telling the truth. At the end of this whole thing, I concluded that Ehasz was a dick of a boss to the girls. Being called an abuser carries more weight than just being a dick. Everyone has been a dick at one point, but being an abuser is something else. Just because Ehasz was a dick doesn’t mean I’m going to stop watching TDP or dismiss his involvement in ATLA.

The next day, BSG brought the issue up despite both avatar-chang having already blocked me by then lmao

On 5 February 2020, after Legacy of the Fire Nation came out, I made a post calling out Iroh’s bs to Azula (guy literally blames Azula for everything that happened to Zuko (something which avatar-chang agrees with apparently, and Iroh even sees Ozai in a better light).

That’s so far what I’ve remembered that involved avatar-chang and dykesia.

Moving on to the next three attackers: catrademption, cardboardseagulls and bizulas.

I’ve seen catrademption around, but I don’t remember if we’ve clashed before. We must have though cuz she’s got me blocked lmao and I mostly only debate back to people when they reply to my posts. For cardboardseagulls and bizulas, I don’t think I’ve ever seen them them before but obviously they’ve seen my blog and misinterpreted everything I’ve written.

But according to them, I’m apparently a Azula apologist, extremist, irrational, toxic, coddles and woobifies Azula, justifies everything she does and invalidates abuse victims.

You can see the posts I’ve made to judge whether I actually am an irrational Azula apologist who blames everything on Zuko. One of the most recent posts I made about Azula’s character is this, and there’s still several more posts like that. Just search #meta or #analysis in my blog search and all of them will just pop up. I can assure you, I have never acted as if Azula has done nothing wrong or did everything right or whatever lies these people are spewing.

If anyone has proof that I’ve talked shit about people in the fandom to other people before, please, present your evidence. I highly think this is impossible because I actually don’t have many friends on Tumblr, nor do I usually initiate conversation because I’m awkward af.

I’ve also tried approaching those I recognized in bsg to find out more about the situation (and at least give my side of the story). Most of them have chosen not to speak to me LMAO but one of them who’s chosen to remain anonymous for their privacy, admitted that dykesia (hexful) forced them to block a blog before (after realizing they were interacting with said blog) and if not, they would be blocked themselves. I can’t post the conversation publicly because they’re afraid their speech mannerism will give away their identity. @space-sword has also shared his experience with avatar-chang on his blog and was pressured to cut off ties with ppb21 just to join the oh so magnificent Ba Sing Gay.

There’s absolutely no reason to judge someone based on their sexual orientation, race, color or age either. They rant about being discriminated against or being generalized or stereotypes but they’re the ones hypocritically committing these actions, and then justify their actions by saying ‘we’re oppressed, they’re not, so it’s not racism or discrimination’. And yet people still wonder why discrimination is still rampant LMAO

I can’t speak for the blogs they victimized in bsg, but I personally don’t agree with talking shit about them on a public server and then criminalizing them as if they’re actually predators. I also don’t agree with involving the blogs’ friends simply because of their association. I also don’t agree with demanding people to block blogs they don’t like because that’s just pure manipulation. That’s wrong and marginalizing people. Unless someone has actually been harassing or literally preying on people, then there’s no reason to actually go around warning blogs about them unless they’re asked about it.

If they feel uncomfortable about something? Then avoid that blog, filter their tags or even block that blog if they’re that uncomfortable—BUT they shouldn’t demand others to do the same just for their own benefit. It’s not up to them to decide what a person can or cannot see or who they can or cannot interact with. They’re not their parents, and they obviously have no right to pressure people into doing things they don’t want to. If they think it tactless that I shared the conversations? Oh honestly, a line was crossed when they spread shit about me so idc. If they actually feel terrible for being called out? GOOD. That’s what they should feel, because in no way was any of what they were doing right or justified. If they’re going to shit on me then expect to be burned because I’m not someone who’ll just shrivel in fear because they have a bigger following.

#ba sing gay #bsg

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firelord-frowny · 4 years ago

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not to sound like an Elderly Homesteader, buuuut

america’s addiction to convenience is gonna be our undoing.

SO MANY of the most critical issues we face - socially, health-wise, environmentally, financially - stem on some level from a desire to 1) have something Right Now, or 2) complete an objective with as little work or investment as possible. and it’s an addiction that exists at ALL levels of society, from the CEOs who exploit their ~employees~, to school systems putting all the money in admin’s pockets while letting teachers go broke, to husbands who think ~getting the bills paid~ is their only responsibility and their wives should handle everything else, to parents who abuse their kids into submission instead of taking the time to actually bond with them and teach them how to be a well-adjusted human being.

america’s addiction to convenience and refusal to sacrifice that convenience is exactly why this stupid ass country couldn’t bring itself to just hunker the fuck down for a few months so we could spare as many lives as possible as we live through this plague. People were really SO determined to Go Out To Eat and have Get Togethers and travel, no matter what the cost. People were too fucking lazy or entitled or selfish to just put some fucking cloth on their face when they do have to go out. People are so fucking married to capitalism and ~the economy~ or whateverthefuck that no one even WANTED to TRY to come up with a way to keep people fed and housed and safe in spite of not being able to work for an extended period of time. That would have been too much trouble! Too much trouble to hammer out an emergency plan that might have been able to spare over half a million lives. It’s more convenient to just let them die. 🙃

Sometimes you HAVE to be uncomfortable. you just DO. sometimes you HAVE to go without luxuries for the good of your family or your community or your whole region. sometimes you even have to go without NECESSITIES. sometimes there really isn’t a way around a problem other than to Struggle until you come out on the other end of it.

but americans can’t do that lmaooooo we are some FUCKING WIMPS.

So many people and so many places have had to make the choice to be uncomfortable for now so that things can be Better in the future.

you know what it reminds me of????

it reminds me of how all these (mostly white, sorry not sorryyyy) conservative dingbat fuckwads like to whine about ~frEeEdom!!!~ when it comes to masks or vaccines or social distancing and whatnot. they like to bitch about their ~right to liberty~ and ~this is america, you can’t tell me what to do in the Land Of The Free~!!!!

as if they have ANY CONCEPT WHATSOEVER of what “freedom” even IS. as if they have any UNDERSTANDING of the depth of pain and depravation that’s left behind when a people spend centuries in bondage, subject to abuse and humiliation. FORBIDDEN from owning property, let alone their own BODIES. FORBIDDEN from choosing how they’d like to spend their life, let alone their DAY. Pushed and shoved and relegated to the absolute worst living conditions where they MUST remain without question, lest they be hurt or killed for objecting or trying to leave. Forbidden from receiving an education. Forbidden from wearing their natural hair. Forbidden from receiving medical care, and when they DO receive medical care, it’s subpar to the point of outright malpractice - except it’s not really malpractice as long as it’s done to a nigger, right???

the fact that anybody alive anywhere can fix their fucking mouth to say - proudly, no less - that getting a vaccine or wearing a mask has FUCK ALL to do with ~freedom~ makes me so goddamn sick to my STOMACH.

Lmao you think your mild irritation about having to loosely cover your nose and mouth in order to prevent MASS DEATH is comparable to oppression? REAL oppression?? the kind that keeps families in inescapable poverty for GENERATIONS??? you think being required to get a vaccine (AGAIN: TO PREVENT MASS DEATH) belongs in the same category as being forced to undergo nightmarishly inhumane torture medical experiments? You think a proposition to allow anti-vax parents to send their kids to a Designated Anti-Vax School so your nasty little petri dish of a child won’t pose a health risk to all the children of Rational Adults is cut from the same cloth as jim crow segregation??? REALLY?? lmfao THIS is the pathetic cause you’re determined to crucify yourself on? THIS is the legacy you think is worthy of your martyrdom? THIS is what is so important to you that you have a fucking orgasm at the thought of taking up arms to fight against it??? THIS is the thing that’s such an enormous threat to your self-respect? THIS is what stirs up righteous rage and indignance in your ugly ass empty ass soul??? THIIIIISSSSS is what you think is going to snatch your humanity out from under you???

LMFAO you weak little bitch baby!!! you’re a fucking toddler who thinks dropping their pacifier is a worldwide catastrophe. gotta have everything, and gotta have it NOW, and if you don’t get it, you’ll make everyone miserable with your loud, destructive tantrum until they give you what your vile ass doesn’t deserve.

just??? there is absolutely 0 ability to sit quietly and cope with temporary frustration.

and now there’s a deadly plague running amok a la addictinggames Pandemic 2. now the planet is LITERALLY on fire, AND flooding, AND drying out.

i hate it here!!

this post took a HARD left and im done now omg

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artificialqueens · 5 years ago

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Level Up, Chapter One (Branjie) - Holtzmanns

“Vanessa, Brooke’s going to be your partner.” Kameron throws a haphazard arm around Brooke, and Vanessa has to hold back a laugh when Brooke rolls her eyes. “Careful, though. She won’t go easy on you.”

Brooke. So that’s her name.

“I don’t think she wants me to.” Brooke’s lip curls up in a smile as she gets closer, and Vanessa has to try hard, really, not to fidget. To stay cool.

Because she’s cool. Right?

“I won’t go easy on you either then, Miss Thing.” Vanessa sniffs.

Her bravado is going to get the best of her eventually, she knows that. But how’s Vanessa going to be the shit if she doesn’t convince herself of it first?

What do you get when you pair a retired boxer with a new girl who has something to prove? Another holtz multichap special, that’s what.

AN: Hi again!! It’s been awhile since the last multichap. This one isn’t as prewritten, and may take a little bit longer to post because of real life happenings. That being said, I hope you enjoy it! To whoever sent me a million asks on tumblr telling me to post it now rather than waiting: I love you. Writ, as always, is the best for betaing <3 Enjoy!

“I’m not going in there.”

“Like hell you aren’t. If I have to pick your ass up from the station one more time ‘cause you can’t stop picking fights with people twice your size, I’m gonna lose it.”

“How’s a musty boxing gym gonna help with that?”

Vanessa slouches in the seat of her sister’s car, crossing her arms, because the whole thing is stupid.

It had been Rob’s idea, anyway. Alexis’ boyfriend. Also the cop who’s kept her from etching ink onto her criminal record. Doesn’t make his idea any less ridiculous.

Alexis sighs, and the sight is reminiscent of their mom’s expression when she’s overworked and impatient and coming off a twelve hour shift. “Because you need to channel whatever… this is, properly. You can’t keep blowing up at people, ‘cause I’m not always gonna be around to bail your ass out.”

“He deserved it.” Vanessa mutters under her breath, because the guy did. “He wouldn’t stop harassing A’keria even though she told him she had a boyfriend, why wouldn’t I sock him in the jaw?”

“Because the cops had to come and break the fight up and the makeup on your face is doing absolutely nothing to hide your black eye.” Alexis’s voice is flat, and Vanessa looks in the mirror and scowls, because she hates that her sister is right. “All I’m saying is, there’s other ways to do things. Such as not punching strangers - even if they deserve it.”

“So coming to…Hytes Boxing is going to change that?” Vanessa wrinkles her nose as she reads the name on the side of the building. The fluorescent lights behind the sign are flickering, withering out, and the surrounding air has a faint odour reminiscent of gym socks.

Hell, the holding cell at the local station smells better. Vanessa’s had to spend the night there enough times to know.

“Maybe letting out some punches on purpose here means you won’t explode on people when you’re all worked up and mad. Worth a shot. And you owe me, ‘cause sooner or later Rob’s gonna get tired of me begging him to let you off without even a fine.”

“Getting into a bar fight isn’t a reason for a fine.” Vanessa mutters, because it’s not, or at least she thinks it isn’t. She should know the law better, for how much she likes to tow the line on it.

Alexis raises an eyebrow as she pulls the keys out of the ignition. “Here’s how it’s going to play out. You’re coming in here and looking around with me, or I’m telling cousin Linda about the time you coloured all over her white purse when we were kids and she never found out it was you who did it-”

Vanessa groans, holding up a hand to make her sister stop talking. “Jesus, fine. Lead the way into gym sock central.”

Looking around, Vanessa’s not sure if punching a bag is as satisfying as socking a douchebag in the face, but the sweat soaked athletes with their hands wrapped in bandages look like they’re enjoying it enough, from the way that they keep letting loose hit after hit. It feels almost cultish - the way the coaches are cheering their athletes on, the way that they wear the sweat dripping down their skin like a badge of pride.

Vanessa’s not sure if she wants to get herself that dirty, or smelly. Hell, she manages to keep her lashes in place most of the time she has to go off on someone to defend her girls. Though there are women in sports bras with braids running down either sides of their heads working out all over the gym, and it’s almost enough to make Vanessa change her mind.

A girl dressed similarly, but in a full tank top, waves from the front desk. She’s covered in tattoos, blues and greens lighting up her neck and chest and shoulders and Vanessa would get a closer look, really, if it didn’t mean that she’d be staring at the woman’s boobs.

“First time here?”

Vanessa chances a look down, spotting the woman’s name tag. “That it is, Kamer-”

“-So do y’all do anger management classes or something? ‘Cause my sister could use them. Or at least know how to throw a punch without breaking a knuckle. She’s done that.” Alexis leans across the counter, sticking out a hand for Kameron to shake, and she does with a grin on her face.

A real good first impression. Vanessa wants to disappear.

“Shut up, Alexis.” Vanessa grumbles, because there’s no way she’s coming back now, with Alexis embarrassing her at any given opportunity.

Not that Vanessa would expect anything else.

“We don’t have the first, but we can teach you how to throw a punch. Not that you look like you need much guidance.” Kameron looks Vanessa up and down, and it makes Vanessa feel better, really, for accidentally looking at her tits earlier. “You look scrappy. Who gave you that shiner?”

“Doesn’t matter. I can throw down a little.” Vanessa’s not gonna deny the truth, who is she to do that?

“Just a little?” Kameron raises an eyebrow, a smirk on her lips and it makes Vanessa scowl.

“Why, wanna test it out?”

“Seriously? Relax, Vanj.” Alexis holds out a hand, lets out a deep sigh. “Just take a class here. Don’t fight this nice woman.”

“I ain’t fighting anyone.” Vanessa mumbles, crossing her arms. Not yet, at least.

Kameron, for her part, looks more entertained than anything else, as she pulls out a flyer from behind the front desk. “Lucky for you, we have a sale on beginner classes right now, too. Think about it.”

“She doesn’t need to think about it. She’s doing it.”

“Shut up , Alexis.”

The fatigue in Brooke’s muscles and tendons only become noticeable once she’s out of the ring, once the adrenaline in her system gives away to a feeling of lead that drags her down, her feet like anchors on the ground that want to bring the rest of her body with them.

But it’s a feeling that’s reassuring, helping to remind Brooke that she’s alive. That she’s gotten to this point because she’s capable of pushing her body like this, that hit after hit and the light shuffle of her feet are all that she really needs to reach greatness.

She knows it’s not true, but it’s nice to live in delusion sometimes. She needs it these days.

Unrolling the wraps around her knuckles feels like she’s unwrapping an unlikely present every time, though her knuckles are calloused enough that a little bit of blood doesn’t bother her anymore. A cold rinse under the sink, a shake of her hands before she washes her face and she’s good to go.

Brooke still uses the lockers like she always did when she was a kid, and it feels too strange not to do so now. Doesn’t matter that she owns the place and easily could use the private bathroom.

It makes things too real.

She’s about to push the door open, hurl the towel into the laundry basket that sits just outside the entrance, but she stops. Someone’s watching her.

“Can I help you?”

Brooke raises an eyebrow, because the girl’s meticulously done hair and tight jeans don’t exactly fit in with the rest of the gym. Nor does the layer of makeup on her face, even though it does make her glow a little bit.

“Your hands get that bloodied up and nasty every single time?” The girl looks mildly impressed. Brooke holds in a smile.

Brooke smirks. “Doesn’t exactly fit with your manicure, does it?”

“Please.” The girl rolls her eyes, holding up her own hands with healing scabs along the knuckles. “You’re not that special, blondie.”

Huh.

“I stand corrected.”

Brooke likes her. Mostly because she’s the only person who’s stepped foot in this gym with enough balls to say something back to her. Everyone else is still hung up over the legacy of her dad, over treating her differently because she’s his kid-

-used to be his kid.

It isn’t easy when everyone walks on eggshells around you.

So maybe it’s a little refreshing to meet someone who has no sweet clue about the history of the gym, and no idea that she owns it now. She doesn’t necessarily need to know it, either.

“Don’t your nails break off when you throw a punch? That can’t be comfortable.” Brooke has to hold herself back from making a face at the long nails, dark red and making clacking noises against the wall that the girl’s hand is resting on.

“You think I got money for acrylics? These are press ons, mama.”

“That’s more like it.” Brooke leans against the wall, lets go of the door, if only because she’s enjoying the woman’s company. “Now what are you doing in a place like this?”

The girl holds up the flyer. “Thinking of trying a class. Not that I got a choice with my bitch of a sister.” She scowls, crossing her arms. “Since you go here and all that, would you recommend it? This shit fun?”

Brooke has to hold in a laugh. “It’s okay, yeah. I’d say it’s worth a try.”

She isn’t about to hype up her own gym but it’s fun, seeing what someone else thinks of the place without holding anything back.

“Maybe I’ll do it, then. Do y’all gotta pay for your own gloves and wraps?” Vanessa gestures to the items in Brooke’s hands, makes a face at the blood and sweat stains on them. “Hope that shit goes in the laundry.”

Brooke grabs the end of her wrap, starts to roll it up. “You have to buy them, but I have a feeling you’ll like it. They’ll be an investment for someone like you.”

The girl makes a face at Brooke, her nose wrinkling. “What makes you say that?”

“You seem like someone who can’t resist a challenge. There’s plenty of those here. Unless you want to let them go, of course.”

Sue Brooke, she wants to see what this girl is capable of, despite the fact that she looks like she’s never stepped foot in a boxing gym before today. There’s something about her that Brooke can’t help but be entertained by, despite the fact that she doesn’t even know her name.

“Let them go-bitch, I’ll be taking a class, don’t you worry your sweet little head about it.” The girl sniffs, running a hand through the waves on her head and Brooke’s reminded, for a second, of how sweaty and gross she must look next to her.

But hey, the girl’s still talking to her, so it’s a win.

“Good to hear.” Brooke can feel her lips curl up in a smile. She’s got this girl figured out already, and she likes it.

“Also I didn’t catch your name, Mohammed Ali. You a regular here or something?” The girl cocks her head, crosses her arms.

“You could say that. It’s-”

“Hytes, come over here!” Kameron’s voice echoes across the gym, and Brooke has to suppress a groan when she sees the redhead looking stricken in front of the cash register, which has probably broken down again. They really do need to buy a new one.

“Hytes?” The girl makes a face, her eyebrows raising on her forehead. “Ain’t that-”

“See you around, newbie.” Brooke pushes past her with a wave, heads for Kameron, because she can let the girl come to the realization by herself. She doesn’t need to be there.

Besides, Brooke has a feeling that the girl’s going to be back. She can find out her name another time.

“Vanj, I swear to God if you’re not in the car in the next thirty seconds-”

“What are you, a military sergeant? Relax! I’m coming!”

Alexis is scowling by the time Vanessa skids down to the car, sliding into the passenger seat mere milliseconds before Alexis presses down on the gas pedal.

“What took you so long, anyway?” Alexis chances a glance over at a red light and Vanessa shrugs, before pulling down the passenger seat mirror.

“No reason.”

Vanessa had absolutely not been trying to get her braids to look like those of the girls at the gym as they had been about to leave. Nope.

Not at all. Even though that’s exactly where Alexis is dropping her off.

She’s kinda succeeded, though. Almost feels like she’ll blend in with them.

Except that it’s a bit of a rude shock when they reach the gym, and Vanessa’s confronted by all the muscle. The guns. The quads. The abs poking through. All of the athletes are built, really built, and it’s enough to make Vanessa shrink back against the entrance every second a punching bag rattles, or a body hits the floor.

How’d she ever think before coming back here that she was gonna cut it?

But the hole in her bank account left by the deposit for the beginner boxing class is hard to forget (sweet jesus, she needs payday to hit again). So Vanessa heads towards the change rooms, pushing the heavy doors open because she doesn’t really have any other choice.

“No, wait, wait, I wasn’t ready! We gotta start again, girl.”

“Not my fault you can’t hold a handstand. You snooze, you lose.”

“I’m gonna push you over-”

“You wouldn’t dare-”

Vanessa has to try hard to hold back a laugh at the mess of limbs in the middle of the change room, two girls having fallen on top of each other yet somehow still bickering. She scoots around them but can’t tear her eyes away, especially as their argument continues while they go back into handstands.

“You play dirty.”

“Do not. All is fair in love and war, baby.”

“They’re always like that. Don’t mind them.” The voice in Vanessa’s ear makes her jump, as a girl in a purple sports bra and leggings walks up to her, starts putting bobby pins into her hair. “Pretty standard.”

“Mind them? I’m loving this free sitcom. Is it always handstands?” Vanessa tilts her head and watches as one of the girls tries to walk in her handstand. The sight is impressive, admittedly.

“Yesterday it was cartwheels across the hallway. I swear, one of ‘em will break their wrists doing stupid shit before they ever hurt it while sparring. Not that it isn’t entertaining as shit.” The girl beside Vanessa shrugs, sticks her hand out. “Asia.”

“Vanjie.” She’s not sure how hard she needs to shake Asia’s hand, if the girl is judging her handshake strength, but Vanessa doesn’t get to mull it over much before the girl is pulling her hand away, pointing to the two girls in the middle of her room.

“Is that your real name?” Asia raises an eyebrow and Vanessa shakes her head, snickering.

“You think my mom would look at my bald newborn head and name me Vanjie?”

“I got a cousin named Eunice, so you never know.” Asia shrugs, before pointing to the two still wrestling on the ground. “These two bozos are Monet and Monique, respectively.”

Monet pushes her braids away from her face and waves. “I’d shake your hand with mine, but I was trying to push Monique over and I’m pretty sure she farted on it-”

“Bitch, what-”

Asia shrugs when Monet and Monique start to wrestle on the ground. “See?”

Vanessa snickers. “Y’all are wild. Real wild. I love it already.”

“You ain’t seen nothing yet, girl.” Asia shrugs, starts wrapping her knuckles. “So, you joining the class?”

“Something like that.” Vanessa shrugs, and there’s so many things she wants to ask, all the curiosity building up inside her about what’s going to happen but she keeps it back. Doesn’t want to look too keen already. “What’s it like?”

Asia cocks an eyebrow when an announcement begins to blare on the overhead speakers. “You’re about to find out.”

It doesn’t take long for Vanessa’s intrigue to fade into breathlessness, a desire to collapse on the matts because she’s about to pass out, truly pass out, only fifteen minutes into the class. Or at least her legs and arms are going to collapse on her from all the hell she’s putting them through, trying to keep up with Kameron’s barking orders that seem specifically designed to torture her.

“Give me another set! Twenty burpees, let’s go!”

“I thought-this was a boxing class.” Vanessa pants out the words in between gasps for breaths, looking over at Asia who is equally as sweaty.

Asia shrugs before dropping down for another burpee, nearly falling on her own arms. “Can’t punch someone if you don’t have the strength and endurance to back it up. At least, that’s what our lovely dictator up there says.” Asia lets out a groan, rolling her shoulders before her next rep. “Crazy bitch.”

“What was that, Asia?” Kameron raises her eyebrows from her spot at the front of the room, and Asia wastes no time in shooting her a dazzling smile.

“Nothing.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Vanessa’s not sure if she catches Kameron winking at Asia, but the ache in her arms is more important for her to focus on right now. The last few reps of burpees make Vanessa feel like she’s going to throw up, maybe die before she makes it to the end, from the way the sweat is dripping from her brow and her legs are shaking and-

“Water break!”

Finally.

Vanessa practically stumbles to the bench, grabbing her water bottle and collapsing onto the seat in one fell swoop. Asia plops down beside her, wiping her sweat on the back of her hand as she leans against the wall, while Monique and Monét traipse over almost leisurely, as if Kameron hadn’t just attempted to murder them all through exercise.

“Shit. No wonder y’all are fuckin’ built like you belong in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.” Vanessa rests her head against the wall, stares up at the giant ceiling fans that do little to circulate the stale air around the gym.

“We actually have to try for it! This one over here,” Monet exclaims, pointing to Monique, “already has a natural six pack. Freak of nature, jesus.”

“It’s called eating well.” Monique sniffs, tossing back a sip of water.

Monét raises an eyebrow. “You had an entire pizza for dinner last night. Not half. A full pizza. And your stomach is rock solid.”

“The lord just blesses some of us, that’s all.”

“C’mon back, guys.” Kameron’s voice calls out, and Vanessa can’t help but let out a groan, closing her eyes.

She can’t keep going. She’s too weak. Her muscles are fully jelly and-

“Hey!” Vanessa yelps when Monique and Monet each grab one of her hands, pulling her up into a standing position.

“C’mon. The fun part of class is only starting now.” Asia tilts her head towards the punching bags that Kameron is steadying, the mats that she is pulling out of the closet against the wall. “No more burpees anymore.”

Now this is a setting Vanessa can vibe with. She follows the other girls in grabbing her hand wraps, tries not-so-subtly to watch how Monique and Monet wrap theirs almost effortlessly. Even Asia ties hers off with a flourish, and Vanessa has to fight back some choice words slipping from her lips as the wrap on her right hand keeps coming loose, the fabric slipping whenever she wiggles her fingers.

“Alright, I’m gonna need a volunteer to help me demonstrate-Asia, look at you raising your hand so nicely.” Kameron’s grinning as she beckons to Asia, who’s sitting on the mats with a mock offended expression on her face, her mouth wide open.

“My hand is all the way down.” Asia crosses her arms, but Vanessa can see a small blush rising on her cheeks.

Kameron raises an eyebrow. “Should I ask someone else?”

Asia pauses. “Nah.” She scrambles up, joining Kameron at the front of the class, and Vanessa can tell she’s satisfied.

Vanessa’s not sure of the vibe she’s picking up between the two of them, but she’s intrigued. Way intrigued. Enough that she misses out on Kameron calling for the class to find partners, and she’s left by herself when Monique and Monet pair up and the rest of the attendees in the class find their own counterparts.

Shit.

“Who doesn’t have a partner?” The question is unnecessary, really, when Kameron zones in on Vanessa in a second, and it nearly makes her shrink back.

Vanessa feels like she’s the last one being picked for a team in gym class, the one that nobody wants in their group. This class isn’t really like that, she knows, what with three girls being nice to her already, but it’s hard not to feel like a fish out of water when everyone already knows each other. She fiddles with loose threads on the mat underneath her, tries to ignore the part of her that wants to disappear.

Kameron jogs over to the other side of the gym, and Vanessa cranes her neck to see where she’s going as she pokes her head into the makeshift office in the corner. “Hytes! Stop fiddling with Microsoft Excel and get over here.”

Hytes?

“The work isn’t gonna get done on it’s own, Kam.”

The familiar voice makes Vanessa draw in a breath, and she has to keep herself from shifting on the mat when the blonde walks out, the same one that Vanessa had met on her first visit to the gym, the one whose eyes are lighting up in recognition upon spotting Vanessa.

Except the girl can’t be looking at her. Can she?

Brooke. So that’s her name.

“I don’t think she wants me to.” Brooke’s lip curls up in a smile as she gets closer, and Vanessa has to try hard, really, not to fidget. To stay cool.

Because she’s cool. Right?

“I won’t go easy on you either then, Miss Thing.” Vanessa sniffs.

Her bravado is going to get the best of her eventually, she knows that. But how’s Vanessa going to be the shit if she doesn’t convince herself of it first?

“We’re gonna do some simple drills today. Help drill them into all of your heads, if you will.” Kameron grins, and Vanessa has to hold back a laugh at how proud she looks of her own joke.

“Booo.” Asia brings her gloved hands to her face, makes a faux microphone that she points towards Kameron, who rolls her eyes.

Vanessa raises a brow, nudges Monet as Kameron explains their first few combinations. “Are they…?”

“Nope.” Monet shakes her head. “Not together. But Asia’s been taking the newbie level classes with us for ages despite taking the intermediate ones too, only because Kameron teaches both of them.”

“This is some juicy tea for my first day.”

Monet grins. “Stay tuned, bitch.”

A psst makes Vanessa spin in place, turn back towards Brooke who’s looking at her with a raised brow of her own. “Are you planning on trying these drills out today, or…?”

“Yeah. Totally am. See?” So maybe the words leave Vanessa’s mouth a little too eagerly as she bounces in place, but it doesn’t matter, because Brooke’s already holding her own gloves up, beckoning Vanessa closer.

Vanessa replays what Kameron had demonstrated earlier as she tries the movements out against Brooke’s gloves. “Jab, jab, cross-hey!”

Because Brooke blocks them, lands a light jab of her own and it’s not fair, it really isn’t, not when Vanessa had no idea it was coming.

“That’s not part of the drill!”

“Nothing is in real life. Gotta be light on your feet, always on alert, Vanessa.” Brooke’s grinning, and Vanessa can already hear Monique and Monet cracking up behind them.

Vanessa has to resist the urge to pout, cross her arms - not that her gloves would even let her do so, anyway.

“C’mon, try again.” Brooke holds her gloves up, and Vanessa is wary, because what’s Brooke going to do, now?

But Vanessa has never been one to back down from a challenge. So she goes for it, throws the first jab but counters with her opposite hand a step before she’s supposed to, raising her dominant hand to block her face. It’s enough to avoid Brooke’s jab, land one of her own, and sure, it’s not in the drills, but the look of surprise on Brooke’s face is satisfying, especially when Monique whoops from behind them.

“She’s a spicy one!” Monique nudges Monet as she says it, and Vanessa can’t help the shit-eating grin that grows on her face, even as Kameron walks over with a raised brow.

“We’re doing drills for a reason. No freestyling, not even from you, Hytes.” Kameron taps Brooke’s shoulder as she walks away, but Brooke’s eyes are lit up with something Vanessa can’t quite recognize.

Intrigue? Respect, maybe? Vanessa’s not sure.

But she knows she’s definitely caught Brooke’s attention now, if she hadn’t done so already.

Vanessa’s arms are aching, her body covered in sweat and she feels like she’s going to collapse once she sits down, but…

She’s never felt more invigorated in her life.

She wants to go back to the class, have another turn against Kameron’s punching gloves, maybe practice the combinations she’s just learned. She wants Brooke across from her again, looking at her with those eyes that she wants to unravel, get to know more. She wants to learn, she wants to get better and better, because whenever she starts something, she wants to build on it. Become an expert, become the best.

Of course, life isn’t that easy. Most of the time, when Vanessa starts something, she abandons it not too long after, because sticking with things is hard and her attention likes to jump around, find a new target.

But something about channeling her energy for a reason, being strategic on purpose, had felt nice in the class. Sure, she’d felt like a damn fool as the other participants followed the combos with a practiced hand, a familiarity, while she’d initially stumbled through, but things are going to change. Vanessa feels it, because she wants to stay.

“I’ll give you twenty bucks if you can jump from this bench to that one across the room.”

“Better get your wallet out.”

Vanessa cracks an eye open, and Monique’s tentative look across the room as she stands on the bench makes her raise a brow. Monet looks entirely too pleased, and it’s not too hard to figure out that she’s set Monique up.

“How the fuck do you both still have any energy right now?” Vanessa doesn’t get it. She’s tired to the bone, heck, she’s probably never going to get up from the bench again.

“‘Cause I have to always prove her wrong, that’s why.” Monique sniffs, as Monet shakes her head, rolling her eyes.

Vanessa likes them. They’re the same brand of insane as she is and it’s almost as if she’s watching her very own sitcom, from the way the two of them bicker all the way to the showers.

Vanessa kicks off her shoes, leaning herself back against the cool metal of the lockers and she can’t hold back the sigh that escapes her lips. It’s a wonder that the heat emanating from her skin isn’t visible steam because she feels like she’s on fire from the inside, like the sweat dripping from her brow, along her shoulder blades is never ending. She’s gonna need a long shower.

Pulling off her gloves makes her hands feel so much lighter, able to move. Vanessa opens and closes her fingers, makes a face at the sight of the wraps around her hands that have already begun to unravel, coil on the bench in a heap. She hadn’t exactly known how to fasten them properly before the class, not that she does now, either.

Oh, well. She has time to improve.

“Your arms feel like they’re gonna fall off yet?”

Brooke. Looking just as sweaty as Vanessa feels, as she tugs out the braids in her hair and sits down beside her.

“No.” Vanessa raises an eyebrow.

Brooke smiles. “Good. Bodes well for your next class then, doesn’t it?”

“What makes you think I’m coming back?”

Vanessa’s always entertained by people like Brooke. The ones who look put together, all calm and collected even though they can be anything but. She wants to see what makes Brooke tick, feel out her buttons. See if she can catch her interest, whether it be through annoyance or enjoyment.

“Please.” Brooke snorts, looking Vanessa up and down, and it’s hard not to feel exposed. “I saw the way you were out there. You were having the time of your life, you can’t even deny it.”

“I was not.”

She was. But Brooke doesn’t need to know that.

“I know you’ll be back.” Brooke winks, rises to her feet, and Vanessa has to try hard to keep her eyes on Brooke’s face, rather than let them drag down lower. “Girls like you always are.”

“Girls like me - hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” Vanessa stands on her tiptoes, watches the way Brooke disappears towards the showers.

Brooke shrugs, raising an eyebrow before turning the corner, and Vanessa has never wanted to follow someone more.

“See you around, Vanessa.”

#rpdr fanfiction #branjie #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #lesbian au #level up #holtzmanns #boxing au

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