#lets get this rewrite poppin

[xoteajays]

the mcu rewrite | main ocs

between s.h.i.e.l.d and lock-up, ava booker chose the lesser of two evils. neither were ideal, but at least at s.h.i.e.l.d she could pretend she was doing some good. besides, with a ‘shining’ offer from fury himself, how could she refuse? when she joins the academy though, she wishes she had. it’s noticeable from the first day that she’s not exactly well-liked, especially by her supervisor. there’s little to be done though, the government had never liked vigilante justice, especially when it was being preformed by ‘violent’ mutants. ava didn’t consider herself violent, but sundrian’s track record wasn’t great. after seemingly pushing her supervisor to the edge, he offers a challenge to her so-called ‘skills’: get into the avengers building and back out, with one of their s.h.i.e.l.d security cards in hand. it’s almost too easy for her. however, glory doesn’t last when fury pits her training the avengers; since, quoting her, they were ‘completely unequipped to deal with mutants’.

marie-ange carnahan’s life changed at 16 when her father died. a military man and the only person mar would ever consider her parent. his death upended mar’s life and witnessing it destroyed her older sister, aurore. the sisters spiralled; aurore fell into herself and mar fell into trouble with petty crime. it’s only when she sees how far her sister has fallen into her mental illnesses that mar pulls her head in. she manages to graduate high school and turns her gaze to s.h.i.e.l.d, her father had once spoken highly of the agency. she trains extensively and graduates almost top of her class at the operations academy. she was on a good path, until her diagnosis. a brain tumour, quickly discovered to be inoperable, untreatable. she’d be dead, and her sister would have no one. mar wouldn’t allow it, she wouldn’t go down without a fight. that stubbornness lead her to a follow the quiet whisperings to s.h.i.e.l.d’s labs, to a supersoldier experiment that was just getting legs. she’d be their guinea pig, she’d sign any paper so long as her sister would be cared for in the case of her death. experimentation comes with difficulty, but mar prevails. ‘liberty’, she becomes, though she hates the name. it’s just something of a ‘shame’ that steve rogers is un-iced before she ever debutes.

she cares nothing of heroes, that is what is to be said of ilena strophalos. she was no hero herself but she carried names upon her shoulders, as all the infamous do. she was the moonstone, the crossroad’s queen, hecate’s child. she was blessed with little in the terms of her mother’s magic, but most forgot hecate’s other associations; the moon and graves and night, the crossroads ilena found familiarity in, the dogs nipping at her mother’s heels and the ghosts unseen by other’s eyes. she cares nothing of heroes, but witchcraft is her mother’s right and ilena stands with the sorcerers and witch and mages. when chaos magic comes to life in their realm, ilena finds it essence in the ruins of sokovia. hecate and ilena are no strangers to chthon, and the wielder of his magics must be protected lest they unleash him upon the world. so ilena is given a missions: to search the mystic locals and find chaos’ host, and if she must deal with heroes to do so, then so be it.

oc cast and (pictured) recast: - kim go eun as ava booker / sundrian. - alycia debnam-carey as mar carnahan / liberty maverick. - melissanthi mahut as ilena strophalos / the moonstone. - olga kurylenko as natasha romanoff / black widow.  - gratiela brancusi as wanda maximoff / the scarlet witch.

[annymation]

The voices in my Wish Rewrite

I haven’t talked much about it, but in my Wish rewrite some characters would be recasted. I wanted to make this post just to show which actors I’d replace… And it’s pretty much everyone except Magnifico, cause ya know, Chris Pine is Magnifico, and Magnifico is Chris Pine, it’s just how it is.

So let’s get this started!

Asha- Denée Benton

Im absolutely OBSESSED with this woman’s voice, she sounds like an angel and carries so much personality in her performance, she sounds pure, youthful, hopeful but also strong, everything I imagine Asha as. THIS is what I imagine the 100th anniversary Disney princess sounding like. Not that I didn’t like Ariana DeBose’s singing tho, but I just love Denee Benton more, and hey, it’s my rewrite, so I get to imagine Asha’s voice how I please. Also I can totally see Asha and Aster singing this song.

Aster- Jordan Fisher

Oooooh this man, I love him so much. His voice has the perfect energy for Aster, sounding youthful and melodic like a prince, it had to be a literally other worldly voice, and I think Jordan’s voice is PRETTY DANG other worldly, like, this example I found on Spotify doesn’t even do him justice, go listen to his other singing chops on YouTube.

If you look up Jordan Fisher you’ll see the guy is DEEPLY connected with Disney in his career, from singing the song “Happily Ever After” 6 years ago, which is the theme song for the Magic Kingdom, to now being the main singer of 4-town in the movie Turning Red. And of course this one time he made a cover of “You’re Welcome”, the guy just lives and breaths Disney so WHY NOT have him as a wishing star? It just makes sense. But besides working with Disney he also has experience in a musicals such as Hamilton, Dear Evan Hansen, Sweeney Todd and more recently he became the new Orpheus in Hadestown… And by god I need a good quality audio of him singing “Wait For Me” more than I need air because that song fits Aster’s character SO WELL.

Magnifico- Chris Pine

Yeah no surprises here, you can’t have Magnifico without Chris Pine… But HIS SINGING VOICE IN THIS SONG THOUGH??? ITS SO GOOD!!! I listened to “Any Moment” ONCE and now I constantly go back to listen to it over and over and imagine young Magnus and Amaya meeting in the woods. I still haven’t posted about Amaya’s backstory BECAUSE IM TOO LAZY TO FINISH THE DRAFT I HAVE EXPLAINING IT- But let me just say her hesitating to start a relationship with him is VERY accurate to her character. And Magnus being like “May I kiss you” out of nowhere because he: 1- Sees himself as irresistible so he thinks she’d fall for him with just that and 2- he had 0 social skills before he met Amaya.

And then there’s the line “Life is often so unpleasant, you must know that as a peasant” ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! This is LITERALLY something my Magnifico would say, I’m so freakin lucky!

My point is, my rewrite’s Magnifico sounds like THIS when he sings, with a deep, smooth and honeyed voice that makes you want to trust him… Take that high pitched voice Chris Pine did in “This Is The Thanks I Get” and throw it out the window. Disney wasted the man’s talent. I’m so mad.

Amaya- Emily Blunt

Do you guys see my vision? Do I even have to say anything? Like really, go watch a scene of the Mary Poppins remake, any scene with her at all, that woman has a voice that DEMANDS respect, while also being motherly, it’s practically perfect in every way. I’m using “Open Up Your Eyes” here as an example though because… Well, it fits her backstory… Ya know, the backstory I’m stalling to talk about 👉👈… But it also just simply fits her personality in general!

And no disrespect for her voice in the movie, Angelique Cabral… BUT ITS EMILY BLUNT AS AN EVIL QUEEN!!! Come ooooon! It’s just meant to be!!!

Also side note, since we’re talking about Queen Amable, THIS design that came from an deleted scene is how I’ve imagined her the whole time:

Like, I could not STAND her hairstyle in the movie, it simply didn’t fit my vision for her character, see, Amaya is sophisticated but she’s also… Practical and likes to feel comfortable, hence why in my rewrite her dress has no sleeves, she values her own comfort more than conforming to the social norms… AND THAT HAIR LOOKING LIKE HEADPHONES WITH THAT CROWN THAT MADE HER FOREHEAD LOOK LIKE A SQUARE DROVE ME NUTS!

So yeah, this is our Queen Amable, voiced by Emily Blunt, with a British accent, in all her glory, we’re moving on.

Valentino- Gregory Mann

This is just a bonus mention, since Valentino doesn’t even sing in my rewrite, he just speaks in like 3 scenes… And you guys have only seen one of them so far. But either way, let it be known he sounds like Gregory Mann, because Gregory Mann sounds adorable. That is all.

Thank You For Reading!

[karalynlovescake]

Best Dreamling Tropes

the other lists I saw for this on discord were just fic tropes that got used in dreamling fics. This list is ones that are SPECIFIC to dreamling and that most of us made up out of whole cloth and agreed upon.

1.) Fishbowl rescue - very important (The tag Hob Gadling Saves Dream of the Endless from Roderick Burgess has its own tag, as it should.)

2.) Let’s rewrite Season 1! (always a classic)

3.) In fact, let’s rewrite the whole fucking arc, solving problems as we go.

4.) Dream sex, either accidental or on purpose. (Who needs prep for dream sex? No one, that's who.)

5.) Hob owns the New Inn and lives in a flat above it

6.) New Inn as a temple to Dream (personal fav)

7.) Dream can just dissolve everyone’s clothes into sand when it’s time for that E rating.

8.) Hob has pets and Dream can talk to them.

9.) Gender is fake, ie The fandom said it’s my turn to have a vulva

10.) Meowrpheus

11.) Desire, stop Interfering in our relationship. (”Stop doing what? I was minding my own business, asshole.”)

12.) Hope of the Endless - he's all ours baby, Neil hands off!

13.) Make Dream Watch Movies (frontrunners are Mary Poppins, Princess Bride and Goncharov.)

14.) Dream’s been making romantic interludes in Hob’s dreams but unfortunately Hob doesn’t remember his dreams. (Morpheus may or may not be aware of this.)

15.) When Dream gets laid it’s EVERYONE’S problem (based in canon, to be fair, but we like this one a lot.)

16.) NGCU (Neil Gaiman Cinematic Universe, ie, Aziraphale and Crowley show up)

17.) Hob coped with the last part of the 20th century by fucking a lot of goth twinks

18.) When dream stormed out of the White Horse in 1989 he left behind his hat, gloves and cloak. Hob took them home and may or may not have used them in his, ahem, personal activities.

19.) When they fight, Hob either refuses to sleep or Morpheus refuses to let him dream. (Or sends him nightmares, but I think that one is less common.)

20.) Flower language and symbolism

21.) “You know I can see daydreams as well, my friend.”

22.) "I hate it when you get big." (Lying)

[artist-issues]

The more I see “deleted scenes” and fan-made rewrites, the more I think Wish’s main problem was forcing the movie to be about making your own wishes come true. Everything’s tied to this idea that it’s a story “about wishes.” But that’s silly. You can’t base a movie on those two words. What about wishes?

“Be careful what you wish for?” That’s a movie idea. The main character can wish for something she thinks will make her life better, but because she never understood that thing she wanted, it turns out to be a terrible fit for her life.

“Wishes can come true if you’re ___?” That’s a movie idea. Fill in the blank with an attribute you want to highlight: brave, selfless, willing to work hard, or of course, faithful.

“Wishing makes life worth living?” That’s a movie idea. Like Hadestown or Mary Poppins; maybe the main character learns that even when circumstances are beyond her control, seeing the world as it could be makes those circumstances light and easy.

But just… “it’s about wishes?” That vibe, where the wishes have to be tangible things, bubbles, ribbons tied to trees, etc…. and those tangible things are the driving force of the plot? That doesn’t make for a good story.

Wishes are only useful in a story, at all, because “wish” is just a fancy term for “what a character wants and can’t reach on their own.” So if you make a movie that’s “about wishes,” but all the characters are trying to do is “protect the desire for something more that can’t be reached,” you have a really flat and hollow movie. One that actually makes the wishes themselves boring. Which…is horrible because what you just did there was not only make magical flowing endangered bubbles boring. You made every character’s main motivation boring.

A good story would have been just that: a story. A character who wants something they can’t reach alone, who overcomes obstacles or makes flawed decisions to reach what they’re unable to get. And then has to learn the lesson they needed to learn in the first place.

The wish itself should just be sort of calmly featured in the background: like Princess and the Frog. Is Tiana wishing for her restaurant? Yes. But is the restaurant, or her act of saying words to the stars about the restaurant, the focus of the movie? No, it’s just a normal “idea or dream the character has.” It’s much more powerful there. ‘’If it ain’t broke, do not let me catch you trying to fix it.

[forabeatofadrum]

It’s Friday, innit? I am back with more reading!

Somebody Like You by @jayne89 had me weeping. Wow. This is definitely a different kind of fic. Blaine was married to Sebastian, but Sebastian died, and now he remarried Kurt. Sebastian leaves a message for Kurt and I was on the floor.

And just when I’m about to pick myself up, Kelly absolutely drop kicks me back to the ground with Broken Glass: Just A Little, which is the second part of the season 6 rewrite. Ouchies ouchies! I’m excited to see where it is heading.

Okay, let’s get off the angst train. Staircases by KCgleek on AO3 is a new fic by a new writer! I’m always excited when people join the fandom after its peak.

There is also some cool canon divergence in Just Married! Surprise! by Canttalkgrounded on AO3. I wish Klaine and Brittana had this kind of wedding instead of the canon one.

More cute stuff! @cerriddwenluna​ is writing a sequel to Swipe called When It’s Right, It’s Right. Yay! Gwen, I am obsessed with the series title being called Swiper, No Swiper!

@rockitmans​ also started a Valentine’s fic called Blaine Anderson vs. Valentine’s Day and it is off to a hilarious start. Blaine, you’re a freaking mess.

You know who else is a mess? Simon Snow in Prejudice, Jealousy & Things You Feel When You Don’t Know You’re Queer by @boyinjeans​. I am obsessed with Simon in this story. And how he realises he’s queer and goes “that makes sense, let’s kiss Baz”. Also, Basil, I recognise your AO3 name and icon from a comment you left!!1 WHAT’S POPPIN LGBTs!

I also read for not one but two (2) new fandoms this week! paint me in trust by @a-tiny-sloth is the first Radio Silence fic I’ve read. It’s a friendship fic and I am so happy! I looked into the Radio Silence tag as a preparation for my own Radio Silence fic and I am so glad I did.

I also stumbled into the Torchwood fic world! Wow! I never even watched Torchwood (long story)! I was scrolling through the Doctor Who & Related Fandoms tag to see how many people write The Sarah Jane Adventures fic (not many) and I saw the premise of For this Day, For this Moment by Lottiethroughthelookingglass on AO3. The first 6 chapters are up and it is so good! Jack and Ianto accidentally get a kid (look, it makes sense within the story) and UH OH what now?

Since we established last week that I count Zelda AUs as fanfiction, I cannot NOT mention everyone’s favourite dilf dadlink by @pluviatrix​. I am so obsessed with this AU. I even got a 69% score on the lore quiz (nice)! For the ones out of the know: the Legend of Zelda games are on one big confusing timeline that spans thousands of years. The reason there are so many Links and Zeldas and Ganons is because of a whole reincarnation thing bla bla what’s important to know is that this means that fans can also make their own AUs and their own Link, Zelda and Ganon. This one is basically two stories in one: Zelda and Link defeating The Big Bad (I support gay rights, I also support gay wrongs) and then Link quits at the ripe age of 20, has a one-fifth life crisis, and then has a kid with Pherse, only for more shit to happen and Pherse goes missing, so Link and his baby Fen need to find her. I love all the original characters (Ishka my beloved) and I specifically love the relationship between this Link and Zelda.

For non-fic news, I read I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver, in Dutch, and Maybe In Another Life by Taylor Jenkins Reid. Both were nice. I do not know how many fics I’ll read next week, because I borrowed 8 books from the library and I now have 17 books at home. We shall see.

[kitgundy]

hey darling omg!!! *squeezes you*

im so curious about your pokemon series!! youve got me hooked! a couple questions for ya.

1) fave character headcanons and why??

2) any top-tier whump tropes you absolutely adore??

3) currently so into enyo's storyline!! what are some things youve truly enjoyed writing throughout it and some things you found a little trickier??

4) a certain evil researcher;)))) never ceases to amaze me with her simultaneous wickedness and complexity. is there truly hope for her?? are there any peculiar motives that you want to talk about regarding the direction her character has taken??

5) overall, what would you say keeps enyo going and persevering through so much??

6) are there any future pokemon species you plan on writing for?? why??

no pressure to answer all of these!! just poppin' by to ask for whenever you've got time.

enjoy the rest of your day!! a heart for you in our colors!! hehe💙💕✨love you.

-lina!!

Hellooo!! *squeezes you back*

1) Enyo liking the smell of Lavender. You suggested it at some point and it’s been in the back of my head ever since. Also Olivia/Lidia/Sarah is autistic and she and her brother got really into this one show about a mad scientist (it doesn’t actually exist I made it up) and to this day she has a tendency to copy the mannerisms of the main character in that show. The Trio (Keyo, Ana, and Cheri, for those who don’t know) collecting moms is also pretty funny. As for canon character headcanon favorites, Cyllene (Pokémon legends arceus) is such a mom figure and I love her so much.

2) Burns. Fire. You probably have already realized this but burns. Also it’s less fun for me if whumpee’s on their own, I like character interactions. Defiant whumpee. Make em angry. Make em spiteful. It’s very fun to write And to read.

3) It took me a while to get her backstory worked out. Also it took me a hot minute to figure out whether Whisper (her wife basically) was dead or not

4) At this point, she’s so far gone that Rewriting Time’s the only way to really. Fix it. When the thing with Enyo and the group happens, Lidia had been in jail for like 18 years for being Literally Horrible during the Hisuian story. She had been spiraling deeper and deeper into rage, and there was no coming back from that for her without something big happening to shake her worldview and change her mindset. (Currently debating which should be the catalyst for rewriting time, either Enyo has enough and starts illusioning to look like her brother to make her feel bad or she gets what she wants, kills her parents, and then realizes it wasn’t worth it because she hurt so many people and Pokémon that she’s become just as bad as her parents. Maybe both?) As for the direction she’s taken, she started out as “ooh scary scientist lady I need for plot in Hisuian”, became “scary scientist lady who’s trying to copy the moves of Pokémon with technology”, and then I was like “Why is she like this? What happened to make her act like this? Why isn’t she nice? Why does she do these things? Something in her past made her think it was okay, so what was it?” And then her parents came to mind, and I realized she hates them so much she wants to use the copied moves to kill them. And she wants the hisuian zoro’s malice-fueled attacks for that. And that’s when she became a complex character. She hated her parents so much that she decided to destroy them, but on her way to doing so, she became them. She wasn’t meant to be this complex, she wasn’t meant to be a tragic character, but one thing led to another, and she became my greatest fear: turning into the people you hate the most. Every character I have comes from a piece of me. Lidia is my rage, my thirst for vengeance, and my fear of what will happen if I let that consume me. And to think she started out as just some random evil scientist! It’s fascinating to reflect on.

5) She needs to protect her family- she knows if she gives up, Lidia will end up going after.. probably Cheri first, and she can’t let that happen. She’s fiercely loyal to them, and she would die to make sure they were safe. Or stay alive in the face of impossible odds, like what’s going on with Lidia.

6) Mmmmmaybe? I know in any Pokémon story I write, there’s always gonna be at least one zoro involved, it’s happened since I was little haha. Zoro are the best Pokémon in my opinion. But I do have this one story on the back burner about a girl who rescues Pokémon from bad trainers, there’s only One zoro in that one so far hsjddjkf

Love youuuu ❤️🥰😊

[ericleo108]

03/17/2023 Click here for Spotify or Apple Music. This is my 35th official release and honestly it comes too soon. I feel like I have enough work to justify this song but I don’t have the clout. By that I mean this track is the start of me talking about the rap game and making songs about other rappers. This is the precursor for “what now” which is an EP that drops April 14th.

“Breaking Bad” is an homage to Eminem and Dr Dre. I don’t know when Marshall will hear this. I think his fans will really like it. It’s basically a tribute to his discography. If you know Eminem’s work you’ll hear it. It gives reference to many of Marshall’s songs while giving my own perspective and the breaking bad theme. I wanted to make the song with a popular media reference that we both enjoy and goes with Em and Dre’s construct. The truth is I’ve listened to Marshall since grade school and probably know his discography better than any other artist. By consequence I “take” allot from him.

The first verse is to introduce why I’m doing this. My old artist name is Apollo. I’ve talked about it before on this blog but here is a link to the Edulution album. The hook is basically asking for a co-sign/ advance but the truth is It’s meant to be standoffish. Honestly I hope this will act as an application to be in the shady aftermath camp but I just wanted to make a track about the best duo in the game. I wanna go to shade 45 just to introduce myself, drop a nice letter and let them know it’s all love. Don’t come for me Marshall.

I’m not sexually attached to Marshall but in the song I wanted to create a type of Stan hysteria in the third verse for Marshall. It’s intentionally supposed to be fanatical so it makes Marshall think twice while being funny. “Pussy Poppin” is written and will probably come out next year along with “ scrumptious” (which is a working title). But I just wanted to point out that I sexualized my male peers before I did it to women. 

The vocals were recorded at Crack Horse Recording in Lansing Michigan by TheyCallMeHeat. The track was mixed and mastered by Sam Peters at La Luna recording studio in Kalamazoo Michigan. The Beat is by tantubeats.com. The cover art was made by ArtworkGang from Fiverr. You can stream or download the track wherever music is sold. Thank you for your support. Be sure to follow because new music is released every week!

You can see me talk about this blog post and next week's release from the last Sunday Update

Lyrics:

I just want everyone to know that Marshall Mathers is my daddy They call me Apollo on the mic, and I’m so happy That Marshall wants to be Zeus cuz in greek mythology  Apollo was his son, and I’ll tell you what there ain’t no stop’n me When I was a little kid I dyed my hair like Eminem did  Blond top, suns hot, gunshots nonstop Listen to D12 one shot two shot Come’n from my bed room, feelin like 2Pac But I was just a white kid, scrawny and always honoree And I was one of the privileged kids, there was really nothing wrong with me But I found “Brain Damage,” and “As the World Turns” And was like “If I had a” million dollars I’d buy a fuckin purse Tuck my dick into my legs, cluck, and give birth  Be like all of these chickens that can’t rewrite his verse Reimagine the page using his words Cadence and slurs like were go’n berzerk (Hey Em) If I like what you written, you might get bitten It’s despicable, like Daffy Duck when I’m spittin  I’m here to keep Shady and Dre from feelin That Shady’s not here to save the children

Come on dawg, give it a chance What would it take, to make you advance Cuz I know you aren’t afraid, to take a stan Let me give you a little motivation to do what you can You can’t break bad without a chemist I am the one who knocks at the door of your business I’m a rider for the sound and hits, a writer and a scientist Like Jesse with it, cuz it’s time for science bitch

I remember get’n high in highschool listen’n to “Rain Man” For the first time, think’n we was brain dead High as a kite smoke’n listen to “Kim” Think’n “Is it gay to touch another man’s ass with your fist?” We met Brady, gotta guilty conscious Bought into the metaphors, melodies, constructs Love watch’n Em go off on the mic And hearin what beat Dr. Dre had derived Learned how to square dance (square dance with me)  and get down to business  How we ain’t got no time to play around, what is this  Say goodbye to Hollywood, cuz my dad’s gone crazy Would you please stand up for the real slim shady I think we’re approaching an age of the gross Just another episode on the yellow brick road If you’re proud to be out of my mind and out of control One more time, you know how it goes

Come on dawg, give it a chance What would it take, to make you advance Cuz I know you aren’t afraid, to take a stan Let me give you a little motivation to do what you can You can’t break bad without a chemist I am the one who knocks at the door of your business I’m a rider for the sound and hits, a writer and a scientist Like Jesse with it, cuz it’s time for science bitch

I wanna say this shit right now while this fuck’n weed is in me I love you dawg, now let’s go make history  I could’a wrote a diss to see if you’d respond offensively Rather be a friend to me, don’t make me your enemy Cuz you know my Machiavelli  He lives on in the intelligently  Crafted written legibly  Poetry that I’m leveraging  I’m ball’n like Pluto Ya Gaia and Blue know Wit your cool flow I’ve fall’n for you, like Bruno And wanna suck Shady’s dick, like Ken Kaniff Get it back from Shaggy, while he’s take’n a shit That’s right pumpkin, you woke up to a blumpkin I wanna share the world with you and all your fuck shit (Marshall)  I bet your more afraid to love another man Take him by the hand, and make him understand (I love you) I love you Marshall, it don’t gotta be like this  We could run away together back where Dr. Dre lives

Come on dawg, give it a chance What would it take, to make you advance Cuz I know you aren’t afraid, to take a stan Let me give you a little motivation to do what you can You can’t break bad without a chemist I am the one who knocks at the door of your business I’m a rider for the sound and hits, a writer and a scientist Like Jesse with it, cuz it’s time for science bitch

[amorisastrum]

Why hello there, I've decided to do writing prompts using lines from musicals so here ya go :)

Change names and pronouns if needed

I wish, more than anything, more than the moon. (Into the woods)

Id do anything for you dear, anything. (Oliver!)

Quite simply the best way of passing an hour or two, Moley its true. (Wind in the willows)

I hope you're happy now! (Wicked)

I just want to dance with you. (The Prom)

Im willing to wait for it. (Hamilton)

Id go anywhere, for your smile anywhere. (Oliver!)

I can hear the bells. (Hairspray)

Life has been kind to you, you will learn. (Sweeney Todd)

What the heck i gotta do [to be with you]. (21 chump street)

It may look untidy, well that is just fine, who cares if it's messy, the mess is still mine. (Wind in the willows)

[Edna] You're timeless to me. (Hairspray)

And she was beautiful. (Sweeney Todd)

They call me wonderful, so I am wonderful. (Wicked)

even as an infant, my great talent showed, clearly I was destined to excel. (Wind in the willows)

I did exactly as you said Pa, I held my head up high. (Hamilton)

Pretty Women. (Sweeney Todd)

Where is love? (Oliver!)

A friend is still a friend. (Wind in the Willows)

What if we rewrite the stars? (The greatest showman)

But know you're here in my heart when I'm out of your sight. (Wicked)

Stay awake, dont rest your head. (Mary Poppins)

You've given me nothing but heartache and hurt. (Little shop of horrors)

How did I get back here? I swore I'd never return. (Spies are forever)

Where the lost things go. (Mary Poppins returns)

Why does it hurt to love you? Why am I in pain? (The guy who didn't like musicals)

You and I were meant to be something more than a faded memory. (Black Friday)

No need to be embarrassed, I like being looked at and you like to look. I know a way to make us both happy. (Kinky boots)

We haven't spoken in so long dear, the year has gone by in a blurr. (Mary Poppins returns)

When you smile, you knock me out, I fall apart. (Hamilton)

Consider yourself part of the family. (Oliver!)

I am in the dark beside you. (Sweeney Todd)

To be on the river with my friend Moley is all the adventure I shall ever want! (Wind in the willows)

When you're gone, I'll go mad. (Hamilton)

Nothings gonna harm you, not while im around. (Sweeney Todd)

What is this feeling? (Wicked)

I'd follow you to the great unknown. (the greatest showman)

Let's go fly a kite. (Mary Poppins)

No not one man, no, nor ten men nor a hundred can assuage me. (Sweeney Todd)

So what am I to do, to keep the sky so blue? (Oliver!)

Spring, finally here, Spring the most joyous time of the year. (Wind in the willows)

To keep your blessings you're a lucky guy. (Mary Poppins returns)

Tomorrow, I love ya tomorrow you're always a day away. (Annie)

Your heart was unflinching, mine still broke in two. My walls were collapsing, once defeated I knew. It was forever and always you. (Nightmare time)

Home. I've heard heard the word before, but it never meant much more than just a thing I've never had. (A Very Potter Sequel)

Im probably gonna do more of these in the future but this is all for now-

[jacaranda-bloom]

FIC WRITER QUESTIONS

Thank you to the lovely @allwaswell16 @runaway-train-works @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed @uhoh-but-yeah-alright and @evilovesyou for tagging me to answer some questions about my writing.

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

47

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

901,445 (Hoping to hit the Magic Million by the end of the year!)

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

1 (One Direction)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

When Tomorrow Comes 1155

The Baby Whisperer 950

Love, Ever After 898

Harry Poppins 856

Play Me A Memory 760

More under the cut…

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh gosh. Uhm. I don’t really write angsty endings? All my fics have Happy Endings and most have epilogues to round them out and tie them up in a bow. Perhaps I’d say If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow) purely because (spoiler ahead) the epilogue is written 100 years into the future so they’ve both passed.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Interestingly, I would actually say the answer is the same as above, If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow). The epilogue is so uplifting and I cry happy tears every time I re-read it. It’s written from the POV of their granddaughter and you get to see the world they had a hand in changing for the better through her eyes, so you get a sense of how impactful their lives were on the rest of society. Oof, tearing up right now just thinking about it.

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Yeah, I have actually. I really enjoy doing new takes on an existing universes, although they aren’t always the easiest thing to pull off tbh. I’m not sure which I would say is the craziest, but the hardest to write was definitely The Peter Pan/Hook AU.

Harry Poppins - Loosely based on the book/movie Mary Poppins, but without any magical aspects.

Playing To Win - Set in the Big Brother house.

The Pirate and The Piper - A Peter Pan/Hook AU which I took a lot of liberties with.

In The Still Of The Night - My Dirty Dancing AU.

A Hungry Heart - This is a Great British Bake Off AU that is due out in September for the Cliche Fic Fest!

8) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Whoa Nelly. Yeah, I do. All the time. Every fic actually. There’s only one, Exposed, the only fic I’ve published that’s not rated Explicit and doesn’t have smut. But, to be fair, the challenge was to write exactly 666 words and I still managed to get the implication in there. Plus, Louis was naked and Harry was applying body paint for the majority of the story, so like, I think I can get a free pass on that one - I tried!

In terms of what type of smut, I guess it varies depending on the story. I tend not to push the boat out too far, but I do dabble in BDSM in quite a few of my fics. A recurring theme in the comments I receive is that my smut scenes are well constructed and detailed, without being too tedious or drawn out, which is lovely feedback to get because they can be challenging to write.

9) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Absolutely. Every single one.

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not often, people are usually so kind, but there have been a couple.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah, quite a lot, particularly on Wattpad, all with my full consent. That said, I’m thinking of stopping this because it’s getting a bit out of hand and I’ve been feeling uncomfortable about it recently for various reasons that I won’t bore you with here. 

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope! I don’t think it’s really my thing tbh. I get very in my head about writing and struggle even to brainstorm or share too much until I’m well into a story.

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

Of the 47 fics I’ve written, there are 45 Larry, 1 Narry, and 1 Louis/Dermot O’Leary (I think mine is still the only fic with this ship hahahaa), so that’s probably a good indication of my fave writing ship.

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I have one lonely WIP sitting on AO3 from 2018. I keep promising myself I’ll finish it and it’s on my schedule every year, then I get distracted by other fics/fests and it gets pushed back. Plus, it needs a complete rewrite because my style has developed so much since I started it, so it’ll be a big job. Based on that, I think that the fic, in its current form, won’t ever be finished as the rewrite will completely wipe out what it was, although the underlying plot will still be there.

16) What are your writing strengths?

World building (or so I’m often told). I write very visually and people often say they can imagine the scene exactly, or that it’s like a movie, or that they think it’s actually a real place I’m describing, when most of the time it absolutely isn’t, it’s just something I’ve created in my weird brain.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue (although my lovely beta disagrees) and telling rather than showing. They’re both things I’m actively working on.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’ve never really considered it. It’s not something I’d shy away from necessarily, but it’s just never come up.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

One Direction. First and only.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Wow. This is really tough because it changes over time. I find that once I’ve finished a fic I don’t want to revisit it for a few months because I’m kind of over it. But I find comfort in them after a while, like I get to go back to that happy place and immerse myself in that world and the characters again, similar to catching up with an old friend. It’s familiar. I think I also like different stories for different reasons and I’m drawn to various ones depending on my mood. My top 3 (although, ask me next week and the list will probably be completely different!) would probably be:

1. If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow). Written for the hybrid fic fest (a fest I created just for this fic lol). It’s not everyone’s cup of tea due to the hybrid aspect, but it’s one of the stories I feel is the most rounded from a character development perspective and the world building was pretty epic, if I can be so bold as to throw that out there myself!

2. No Going Back. One of my Big Bangs from 2020. I adore the way their relationship develops in this fic and the setting (as remote lighthouse keepers) was such a lot of fun to write. Plus I got to collaborate with an amazing artist who created an entire website as an accompanying travel blog which was truly wonderful.

3. From The Heart. This is a series I wrote for wordplay back in 2019. I had no idea that what I was doing was so unusual and so meta by having Louis essentially write for the equivalent of wordplay in the fic. It was such an fun way to share my writing process and challenges I encounter (exactly how many synonyms tabs do I have open at any one time?!) and I thoroughly enjoyed the outcome (although getting there was definitely a struggle).

~

This was really fun and thanks to anyone who made it this far! Writing brings me so much joy and is a wonderful outlet for all the imaginings in my head, so I appreciate everyone who supports me and joins me on that journey.

~

I’m pretty late with this and I’m not sure who has already done it but I’ll tag @fallinglikethis @homosociallyyours @lululawrence @reminiscingintherain and @beau-soleil-louis if they’d like to do this and haven’t already.

[madmaddoxfuryroad]

HSMTMTS: Season 3 thoughts

So I’ve been ruminating a lot about this show today (like every other day) and I got to thinking about what they might do for season 3. Less so plot-wise (I mean season 2 is just over halfway through), but more about what musical they might do, what the cast might be, and how that could tie into the individual characters and their arcs (some more so than others, but c’est la vie).

In trying to figure out what musical they might do, I started first with the obvious: what does Disney own? I don’t think they would return to the HSM franchise (until the final season, but thoughts on that for another day), so anything related to that and other DCOMs I counted out. I also eliminated all Disney animated/princess films. I love them, don’t get me wrong, but seeing as this season they are doing BATB, I don’t think they would immediately go into another animated-film-adapted-for-broadway right after that. So at that point I wasn’t quite sure where to go. Mary Poppins was really the only other thing that came to mind and while I love the film and broadway show I just don’t think it fits the cast well slash even has enough parts to really showcase them. You have Mary and Bert. And then I guess Mr. and Mrs. Banks? Then the kids are a whole other issue. It just felt messy. So I just started thinking about broadway shows that I like, I mean if they wanted to, Disney has the money and could pay for the rights to use most shows. Then everything fell into place.

Into the Woods. I am 100% positive I am letting my bias for this show cloud my judgement, but if you stick with me, I think I can persuade you (or not, your mind is your own and I respect that). First off, Disney owns it. At least I think they do. They made the movie (RIP), so I am going to safely assume they have the rights at this point. Next, yes it contains fairytale elements, which might make you feel it’s a little too close to BATB, but it is such a deconstruction of fairytales and their tropes that I almost feel like it is an amazing follow up to a more traditional fairytale. It introduces conflict and the real world into these fantasy scenarios, which I feel goes really well with high school in general and growing up, expectations being shattered, and learning to alter your world view (I really love this play). Plus, I think it would be exciting to see this cast do a more broadway-type show. Obviously BATB is a broadway show, but I think there is a lot of reliance on knowing the film and less on the play itself. And not going to lie after Julia Lester’s rendition of “Home” last week (which I have not STOPPED listening to) it would be amazing to hear these teens tackle more broadway-style music. Which, takes me to my final point: the cast. What I love so much about Into the Woods is how it is very much an ensemble cast. Yes some roles are bigger than others, but if you have a named character, odds are it’s a fairly good role. And the whole HSMTMTS cast is so talented, I like the idea of them picking a show where it does not feel like anyone is sidelined with their part. Now the only thing left to do is cast it…

FULL disclosure. I ran into an issue early on that I ended up thinking Ashlyn was perfect for every female role and Seb was perfect for every male role. But I was eventually able to push through and cast it (in my humble opinion) pretty well. So I am just going to go off in the order that I cast them, because I think it will help explain my thought process.

THE CAST

Cinderella - Nini. Once I got over my need to hear Julia/Ashlyn sing “No One Is Alone” (loophole to this coming later), this felt like a pretty natural fit and was one of the easiest to cast. For one, I just think Olivia’s vocal range pairs very well with Cinderella’s and she could do beautifully with her songs like “On the Steps Of The Palace”. But what really got me was the way she parallels the character so perfectly. Cinderella is a character who always dreams of more but isn’t quite sure what that “more” is. And because she isn’t *quite* sure what she wants, the character is often seen grappling with indecision (see: “On The Steps Of The Palace”). Most of Act I is her being stagnant and letting the Prince take the active role. Finally in Act II she starts to get a better sense of who she is, who she wants to be, and what she doesn’t want. So this felt like it tied in really nicely with Nini’s journey and would be a great role for her, especially when…

Cinderella’s Prince - Ricky. Yes, yes I know. Ricky and Nini playing love interests? Groundbreaking. But stay with me. For one, I just like the idea of Ricky not getting the lead male role, and this part is perfect for him, regardless. The whole relationship between Cinderella and her Prince mirrors Nini and Ricky remarkably well. The way the Prince sees Cinderella as this perfect maiden who, if he could just be with her, would be the only thing he would ever want/need. But of course this isn’t realistic and isn’t how relationships work, which they both come to terms with by the end of Act II. Their break-up/parting ways scene might be my favorite in the entire play and I think it would be so great for Ricky and Nini to get to perform. In part because the conclusion of the scene is basically them both admitting that they will always love the idea of the other, even though they don’t actually work as a couple. (**I am operating on the assumption that they will have broken up in season 2 and are still broken up, but never really dealt with it). Honestly I recommend just watching the scene I will link it here (it goes from about 2:12:35-2:15:00). Plus, I could totally see there being an episode where they are trying to rehearse this scene, but it just isn’t working so Miss Jenn has both of them improv it or rewrite the lines to something that might feel more comfortable or personal. And I just see that being a really beautiful moment for the two and a chance for growth and closure. I could go on about this dynamic, but I will move on to my final point: “Agony”. First, while it is mostly a comedic song, you can take just the first verse of the song and recontextualize it really nicely as a Ricky pining kind of song, which I absolutely dig (not quitting on my Rina endgame, and you can’t make me) I mean: “If I should lose her, how shall I regain the heart she has won from me? Agony, beyond power of speech, when the one thing you want is the only thing out of your reach”. And BONUS I think we could also get a full-on version of “Agony” in all its absurdist glory with…

Rapunzel’s Prince - EJ. Well, sort of. Technically, no. BUT for the purposes of “Agony”, yes. At this point EJ will have graduated, but I don’t think he will be written out of the show, so it remains to be seen exactly what his place will be. I just think these two 100% need a song together and this is 100% that song. I could see it being something as simple as EJ is helping out with the show, the unnamed kid playing Rapunzel’s Prince is out, so they have EJ fill in. Or they have to have him go on for that kid last minute during the performance. It’s a quick, easily explainable thing that would have SUCH a great payoff.

Jack - Big Red. This was certainly one of the easier ones to cast, but my first thought was of course Seb. Jack is just a boy whose best friend is his cow and Seb radiates that energy. But I needed him for something else. Enter Big Red, the perfect Jack. For one, Big Red has a lot of that starry eyed wonderment that Jack has, that none of the other characters do. There is a purity and innocence to the way Jack sees a lot of things. That pairs nicely with Big Red. And it also opens the door for him to grow and mature more as a character. By the end of the show, Jack is in a place where is needs to transition more to adulthood and with Big Red being a senior by season 3, I think there is a lot of potential here. Also, with Big Red as Jack, I really like the character he is often paired with in scenes, but I will hold back until I get to them.

Witch - Kourtney. Yes. It is her time. One can debate over which character is the “main character” of Into the Woods, but for me it’s the Witch. And Kourtney deserves this. Did I heavily consider Ashlyn for this as well? You know I did. But I grow more and more confident in the casting of Kourtney the more I think about it. First thing’s first: the Witch belts, and I mean BELTS. Dara is such a powerhouse vocally that she would crush every moment of that; I have total faith. But the Witch also has such quiet and tender moments that people don’t think about as much, but are so necessary for the character to be effective and I think she also has that on lock. We have not seen a ton of it (so I would be eager to get more) but when she did her version of “Beauty and the Beast” she was able to find soft but strong moments in the song, and it was so lovely. Then, from a more thematic POV, the Witch is characterized as “the voice of reason”. While everyone else is running around in their fairytale dream world, she is always the one there dolling out the reality checks. And if that ain’t Kourtney. Basically, I think it is her time to get the lead and she would be amazing in this role.

Baker - Seb. Finally settled on a role for him. But really, how could it be anything else? I have felt since the first time we heard him sing (in Truth, Justice, and Songs in our Key, I think) that he was severely underused. The Baker is essentially the male lead, and he has earned it. I don’t think there’s much more that needs to be said here.

Baker’s Wife - Ashlyn. Here’s the thing: could someone else be cast as Baker’s Wife? Yes. And I am sure they would do a fine job. But the thing about this role is that you often don’t realize how fantastic it is until you see someone really great playing it. There’s heart, humor, tragedy, and so much more all wrapped into this character and I would far and away trust Julia/Ashlyn with this above all others. And Baker’s Wife gets to sing a short reprise of “No One Is Alone” so I get to win both ways. No matter how I try to cast it or rearrange characters, I keep coming back to the fact that Ashlyn is just hands down the correct choice. Plus she is one of the better options when it comes to having chemistry with Seb. And I’m not even talking about romantic chemistry, just more about the camaraderie of it, and being able to really see them as a team worth rooting for. They both have an inherent sweetness that makes you care for them, which is crucial for the show. AND this would be another opportunity for Julia Lester to flex her acting after playing VERY different roles in HSM and BATB. Basically, I don’t know when it happened, but I think I am a Julia Lester stan and I only want what is best for her and I think this is it. 

Little Red - Gina. “Didn’t see that one coming did you?” -Pietro Maximoff. And honestly same. There’s always that tough moment in casting when you’ve done the more obvious ones and then you feel sort of stuck with cast choices that weren’t really your choice. But this one really grew on me. Hopefully, I can do it justice. And I will be the first to admit Gina deserves her time to shine because I do think she is amazing. It just isn’t her time yet. It also doesn’t help that Into the Woods is one of the LEAST dance-centered shows and dance it where she really puts all others to shame. So this is where we landed. But it works. I promise. Little Red as a character is pretty naïve, but covers it up with over the top confidence. That feels pretty Gina. I love where her character has gone and all the growth she is displayed in trying to be more vulnerable. But there is still a part of me that does miss mean girl Gina and I think Little Red is a great way to get that energy without backtracking the character development. I don’t think she would be the stereotypical “bratty” Little Red, but I think she could still do something great with it. Also very similar to Jack, Little Red is one of the more innocent characters that has to grow up and face a lot of harsh realities over the course of the play. And I have no doubt Gina would nail that aspect of it, too. And speaking of Jack, Little Red has a number of scenes interacting with him and you know what that means: Gina and Big Red bonding time! I really like the idea of these roles bringing the two closer as friends. And I already head-canon that they would have a ton of fun playing with the fact that they are now Big Red and Little Red (especially since he is on the shorter side and she is on the taller side). Basically I see this as a way for them to build up a really good rapport. I am also pretty convinced that Big Red is a secret Rina shipper, and this would only add to that. And finally even though this is not a dance-heavy show at all, one place where they could add a dance is during “Hello Little Girl”. Now I will be the first to admit that this song is dicey at best, particularly for Disney. But even a scene working on the dance with just the instrumental, no lyrics, could be great. I see it as a partner dance with the wolf (I don’t know dance terms, so maybe this is super vague). And oh, wouldn’t you know it? Cinderella’s Prince is often double-cast as the wolf! (WHAT ARE THE CHANCES) Meaning the Wolf would also be good ol’ Richard Bowen. And I like the idea of getting Rina scenes of them trying to work on the dance, but Ricky is super bad a leading, and they just have fun trying to figure it out. It’s also nice that it is absolutely not a romantic dance so the two wouldn’t feel any added pressure and could just have fun with one another, and that really is when Rina is at its best (not that I would say no to a scene where Gina has to teach Ricky the BATB waltz, but I digress).

Narrator/Mysterious Man - Carlos. By process of elimination, you probably could have guessed who was next. And I know this one also feels like a weird choice but I do kind of love it. First you have the narrator, which is another one of those roles that is only as memorable as the actor playing it, which I think is right up Carlos’ alley. He is always trying to put his unique stamp on things and be memorable and he would take the narrator in a very enjoyable direction. There’s also the matter that I see Carlos as something of an assistant director with Miss Jenn, which makes him a third-party observer of the shows inherently, so it is almost a little meta that he would also end up being the narrator. Then there’s is the mysterious man. I love the idea of Carlos getting to play two very different characters, but I love it even more because the mysterious man is the father of the baker which makes for a lot of sweet moments between the two of them. Yes it might be a little weird for Seblos to be playing father and son, but there is such a vulnerability and tenderness in the moments between the two characters, particularly during “No More” that I can get over it. Because I think they are one of the few pairings on this show that could really pull that off. I just think this character would be a great way to exhibit the range of Carlos.

**BONUS ALTERNATE CASTING**

I really, really love this idea and could not fault them if this was the direction they went, but I ultimately decided against it, mostly because I felt too strongly about another character having the role BUT:

Baker’s Husband - Carlos. I just really love the idea of Seblos getting to be front and center, with their dynamic as the focal point of the show. And honestly Carlos would also do an amazing job as this character. I mean, Seb and Carlos singing “It Takes Two”? How sweet is that? This would also be a great way for the development of their relationship to get a little bit more attention, instead of a side story here and there. There is a lot that could be done with this from a story perspective and I would be here for it.

Unfortunately, then that leaves me unsure of where to put Ashlyn. She could be Jack’s mother, but that feels like such a waste of her. I mean, she would do well and she does have the lead this year, so it’s not SO terrible her having a more minor character, but it just doesn’t feel right. And I really just feel so strongly that she would be the best option for Baker’s Wife out of everyone. And it opens the door to develop the Seb and Ashlyn friendship more, which I am always here for. 

Anyway. Those are my thoughts. If you made it this far: wow and thank you!

[imharehunter]

Pinned post rewrite

Aye yo, It’s me Ice-ice-monster. 

Some other nice names: Ice - Icey - la glace - Robo - Beans - snow - snowy - frost - Blizzard - ice cube

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fandoms: All of them, dm me with something to watch.

Please do not tag me in or dm me politics, I do not wanna associate with that stuff.

DNI: Pedos (pls go get help, you need it), maps, pears, homophobes, Transphobes, LORD TOPAZ, people who are only here to feed off me, batman

Rules for venting:

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Small summary of myself:

Hi, I'm ice! My account used to be a Larimar roleplay blog, but now I'm not.  I've been on here for a year. I did have an account before, but let's not talk about that. I am Ice.

FAQ below cut because yess

Q: Are you cool?

A: perhaps

Q: How are you cool?

A: follow Monika's confidence tips

Q: Favorite Steven Universe episode?

A: I really really like Hit The Diamond. I played softball as a small 11/12 year old.

Q: favorite steven universe character?

A: Spinel, White diamond, Freckles lapis, Leggy Ruby and Doc Ruby

Q: Favorite Doki Doki Literature Club character?

A: Monika or sayori idk rn

Q: what does Wild Man mean?

A: its a mix of Horse Girl, Florida man and the sound, "GAHAGGABDHSHBSJAHSBJSBSB."

Q: whats your favorite pokemon?

A: Litten

Q: whos your favorite adventure time character?

A: marceline, PB, or jake.

Q: favorite reboot me character?

A: Ele.OS baby and best girl. VIRI is best non-binary bot.

Q: what do you draw with?

A: traditionally is ballpoint pens i find. Digitally Wacom Intuos ctl4100 I thinnnk

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A:Yes

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A: luz

Q: favorite fusion?

A: RAINBOW QUARTZ 2.0

Q: Favorite Movie?

A: Mary Poppins

Q: who are you?

A: Me

Q: whats 1 + 1?

A: 11. (Its 2)

Q: how do I be a Wildman?

I've actually been asked these through dms and through asks.

A: Put it in your bio somewhere and notify me.

Q: favorite SynthV character?

A: Eleanor Forte

[shaekingshitup]

MIRACLES HAPPEN

DAY ONE: TANGERINE

A/N: Y’ALL! I WAS DUPED! @teakturn puts out a 25 Days of Christmas every year and my dumbass said I would do it too. But I decided to add a little diversity to the culture and we’re doing a Chrismukkah adventure this year on this blog! This is picking up after this request that I got earlier this year. None of this shit is proofread because I am literally just writing by the seat of my pants so read at your own discretion. I will probably end up rewriting this entire mini series in the future. But enjoy it now. If you wanna be tagged, lmk! Also, I know that in In Sight I said there was a cure for COVID. Swap that out for a vaccine y’all. Viruses can’t be cured. 

Word Count: 2300 

DAY ONE: TANGERINE

December 18, 2022

“Baby you ready?!” Tre called into the house as reached into the basket on his way to the garage. He came up empty handed for the keys to his Lexus. Opening the door to the garage, he saw Sol sitting in the passenger seat of the running car. 

Tre walked over to his baby as Sol smirked at him. 

“You late again,” she said. 

“I’m never late,” Tre said opening the door and climbing in,  “You just early as always,” he shot back as he put the car in reverse. Sol playfully rolled her eyes. After two years of being together, this was always their running joke. The first time they’d met, she’d been pacing back and forth awaiting his arrival. Even after finding their own groove, she still found herself being the one waiting for him- but, he always made it worth it so it was hard for her to complain.

Tre pulled out of the driveway and clicked the remote to shut the door. Out of instinct, his hand went to Sol’s thigh when he put it in drive. “Did you grab my yarmulke?” Tre asked as he threw her a glance. 

“Please don’t insult me. This ain’t my first feast Nemo.” the indignant manner which she spoke had her and Tre struggling to keep in their bouts of laughter. “Yes, baby. They’re in the backseat.” 

“Good. Good. What’s the other name for them again?” Tre asked as he merged onto the nearly empty highway. A five a.m call time could be a blessing and a curse. 

“Kippah” is the Hebrew word for the male cap and “kippot” is the Hebrew word for the female cap.” Sol answered on autopilot as she mused on their situation. She was still taken aback that they’d been contacted by Black Juice to begin with. She’d been following them ever since they’d done that feature with Drake talking about how his own Jewish faith influenced his career path. Although she wasn’t as active in her Jewish faith as she’d wished she’d been in recent years it was still a huge victory to be acknowledged by the leading Black Jewish media network. Okay so maybe they were the only Black Jewish media network. But that definitely meant they were in the lead! She wasn’t stupid to think that this kind of opportunity would have come without Trevante in her life. But, she wasn’t gonna knock it either. 

This 8 Days of Miracles was the perfect task she needed as she figured out what the next step was for her career. Now that she’d finally finished her academic portion of her career she wasn’t sure how to proceed. So throwing herself into this project and hosting both her family and Tre’s for the holidays was the best distraction she could ask for. This time always gave her hope and made her realize that any kind of bullshit she’d put up with wasn’t in vain. It was her annual reset. New Year’s be damned. It also made her feel closer to her father and there wasn’t anyone in this world she’d loved more. At least that’s what she’d thought. She felt pressure on her thigh from the number one contender for her heart as Tre gave her a slight squeeze. 

“What’s on ya mind Sunshine?” Sol looked down at his hand and couldn’t help but cheese. She still beamed every time he called her by that nickname. 

“I was thinking about my dad and how proud he’d be to see me reppin his faith,” Sol said absentmindedly touching her necklace. Tre listened attentively as he grazed his thumb against her thigh in a gentle motion. “ I mean, I don’t know if he could have known that all of the years he instilled in us the value of miracles when we were children we’d still be celebrating Hanukkah after he was gone.” 

“I’m sure he didn’t know.” Tre started out slowly. He honestly wasn’t even sure if she’d finished her thoughts, “But, he probably hoped you would.” The phone rang as they turned off the street and into the lot. “STEPH 👷🏿‍♀️💪🏿” flashed across the Caller ID on his dashboard. Tre clicked the answer button on his steering wheel as Sol handed him his badge to show to Nico, the Security Attendant. 

“We’re at Security Steph,” Tre answered as he nodded at Nico. 

“Okay good. I just wanted to make sure we were starting the day off on time.” Tre and Sol shared a glance. 

“Woman don’t start with me. Call time is 5 and it’s 4:39. We don’t play that late shit over here and you know it.

“Well,  I also grabbed your favorite donuts from Craft Services so no one else would steal them and I wanted to know how long I had to hoard them for your ungrateful self. I can put them back if you’d like sir,” 

“Steph. You can ignore Tre.” Sol chimed in. “We appreciate you and will be walking in the door in exactly 2 minutes. Tre is parking as we speak. We’ll see you soon.”

“Tre, you lucky you have her. Keep her if you want to keep the best managent in town. Bye y’all!!” Steph sang as she hung up. Sol let out a cackle because Steph refused to be referred as anything other than a managent as Tre stood there dumbfounded at how he was being left out to dry. But he knew better than to go against two black women before he’d even finished his morning coffee. He just hopped out the whip and opened Sol’s door so she could do the same. 

Once they’d gotten their morsels of food, gone through hair and makeup and snapped a few photos for Black Juice and their own social media accounts, they were back on the road headed deeper into LA. They had a cameraman in the backseat filming their every move, one car guided them to their location and another followed them as they maneuvered through the cars that were poppin up for their morning commutes. Sol was on her IG live and answering any questions that popped up about where they were headed and her Hanukkah festivities. She watched as the number quickly jumped from 5,000 viewers to 13,000 and counting. She wasn’t sure what this many people were doing up at this hour but she wasn’t complaining. Tre’s mama was of course one of them. He was a mama’s boy through and through and she was always there to support him at any opportunity she could. Sol made sure to greet her specifically. Tre bopped his head to some Jill Scott- being careful not to let his yarmulke fall. Sol sipped some hot cocoa from her thermos and sang off key with him. As soon as they turned on a residential street, she felt awash in a new warmth that the hot chocolate couldn’t touch. She shook Tre’s arm enthusiastically. 

“It’s time!!” she beamed, “Are you ready?!” Tre chuckled at her immediate change in attitude. The car in front was already parked and the camera crew was out on the sidewalk. 

“Yes Sol. I’m ready to spread some holiday cheer. Let’s go make somebody’s day he said. Before Tre could even put the car in park, she was reaching for the handle” 

“AHT AHT AHT” Tre barked out loud causing the cameraman man in the backseat to jump,“ Tre was already exiting the driver’s side and pointed his finger at her as he crossed in front of the car “Don’t even try it.” Sol rolled her eyes and pouted as she waited the few seconds for him to open her door. 

“Thanks Tre,” she stuck out her tongue. She was like a kid in a candy store and was ready to full out sprint to the front door. The IG live comments were flying. 

Okay Daddy Tre! I need a mans to talk to me like that. 🥵🥵

Did this man just bark at her? 🐶

Loook so long as he handles this backdoor he can open any other door that he pleases sis!

Y’all females is wylin as usual. 

Sol glanced at them. “Imma need y’all to stay out of grown folks’ business and just enjoy this holiday work we are puttin in okay” She handed her phone to another crew member and grabbed Tre’s hand to drag him to the front door. 

She pushed the button for the doorbell but no sound rang out. Tre gave three succinct raps on the door and heard someone rushing down the stairs. The door was flung open by a woman in black slacks and a blinding blue polo emblazoned with a nametag that ironically labeled this young woman as “Tangerine”. She couldn’t be more than 25 years old and the toddler saddled on her hip only added to her youthful appearance. 

“Hi Tangerine,” Tre began, “My name’s Trevante and this is Sol,” he gestured to Sol at his side. 

“Hi?” Tangerine answered confused at this couple and the cameras that followed them. 

“We’re here today with Black Juice, a local Black organization that highlights the experience of the Black Jewish community and we’re doing 8 Days of Miracles,” 

“Okay..” Tangerine said not sounding any less confused. “ I’m not Jewish.”  Sol took over as she could tell that Tre’s efforts weren’t getting them anywhere.

“We’re here because your friend Kira sent in a letter telling us about  how great of a mother you are. She said that you’ve been working two jobs here to support you and your daughter.” At this, Sol smiled at the baby, “She told us that the second job you have is for daycare expenses alone.  We wanted to come out here today and let you know that we see what you do and how hard you go to make sure you give your daughter the best. So, we wanted to help you out and give you this. “ Tre gave her the envelope he had in his hand. It read “Day 1: Tangerine”

Tangerine took the envelope as Tre explained. “We’ve paid for your daughter’s child care for the next two years so you can give yourself a break.” She opened the envelope to see the receipt from Tiny Tots Kindercare and didn’t even know what to do. 

“I don’t know what to say.” She paused for a moment as what this truly meant registered in her mind. “I can quit this job and actually spend more time with my baby and focus on my candles.” 

“Your candles?” Sol asked. 

“Yeah. I make candles by hand. I took a few classes and have played with a few scents. Some friends have asked me to make them some and I’ve been waitin to be a little more secure with my money before I start at it.” she answered exhaling deeply. 

“Do you have any candles right now?” Tre asked peeking a little further in her apartment. Sol slapped his arm. 

“Could you be any nosier?” she chastised with love. 

“Yeah I have some. Do you mind holding Layla?” she asked but she practically threw the child into Sol’s arms as she ran to grab her stash of candles. Sol put on her sweetest voice and spoke to Layla about how old she was and if she liked her friends at daycare. When her mom came back Sol could see the sheer joy that she had when showing off her handiwork. 

Tangerine went through all six of her candles and their various scents with them and by the end Tre had bought each one. She was floored and couldn’t do anything but cry at the way her morning was turning around. It wasn’t even 7:30 and she’d already gotten 2 years of childcare, a reason to quit her grocery store job and someone who actually wanted to buy her candles. 

Before they left, Tre made her promise to hit him up when her site and IG were live so he could get more candles and share it with all of his friends. Sol returned Layla to her mother saying her goodbyes and grabbed Tre’s hand to head back to car. She leaned on his shoulder and he could see the contentment in her eyes. Sol almost forgot her phone before a crewmember handed it back. 

She came back to the IG Live trying not to get too emotional. “Look at that y’all! Day one of Hanukkah is off to a start and we’ve already proved that miracles happen! Y’all better stay tuned in over the next week so you can see who we pop in on next. You never know if it could be you! Thanks to Black Juice for giving us this opportunity to turn someone’s ordinary day into something smile about. Y’all betta check them out so you can see the full footage of what we’ve got goin on! Bye y’all!

“Bye y’all!” Tre called out. They answered a few more questions with Black Juice, said their goodbyes and climbed back into their car. 

“Can we go back to bed now?” Tre asked as he pulled back onto the main road and his hand founds Sol’s thigh again. Sol laughed. 

“I mean if that’s what you prefer we can. I had some other things in mind.” she suggested. 

Tre raised his eyebrow. “I swear you see one baby and you always go 0 to 100”

“Look, I just believe in practicing all aspects of having a child! Even the making part.” 

Tre threw his head back laughing. “I’m wit it babygirl”

DING! 

“That’s me” Sol said. She looked at her phone screen. A text from “Mama Rhodes” popped up.  She’d sent some Pinterest looking bible verse again. 

This was the third one this week. It dampened her mood immediately and caused her to groan. The text read: 

Seeing you with that little girl made me so happy for the good Christian grandbabies that you and Tre will be blessing me with in the future. I thank Jesus for the miracle of you and my baby everyday XO. 

“Tre, I got another one from your mom. When are you gonna talk to her?” 

Tre sighed. “I promise. I’ll talk to her soon and it will definitely be before your Chrismukkah Extravaganza. Don’t sweat it baby.” 

Sol did her best not to think about how pushy his mother was being about this raising Christan grandbabies nonsense ever since they announced they’d be partnering with Black Juice. All she could do is trust Tre and do what she was best at: wait. 

---------------

@ghostfacekill-monger @thadelightfulone

[goldeneyedgirl]

Jaliceweek20 Day 1

Against a Wall Part 2

Jaliceweek20 Day 1: Human/Vampire

Words: 6264

Notes: It is DONE. JALICEWEEK IS DONE. I am tired, so I’ll do a wrap up tomorrow. I’m honestly not sure how happy I am with this ending - I’ll write more notes tomorrow once sleep had been acquired but there still might be a third enormous rewrite.

I’m just so excited I finished EVERY SINGLE PROMPT.

Warnings for: suicidal ideation.

—

Nineteen.

There was a shoebox under his bed with a bunch of stuff in it, that he’s collected over his life. Stuff that was special - Sorates’ collar, a rock shaped like a dog, the rubber spider his grandfather bought him from the dime store. And the last thing he put in it was an unopened back of Skittles.

He wonders where that box is now.

—

Things are hard to remember. The doctors say his memory should return, with time, and everything will stop feeling like someone scooped them all out of his brain and threw them up in the air like confetti.

He remembers… Ava. No, not Ava. Yes, Ava, his sister.

She did something.

Ava lit the fuse that had been dangling over the family for six years. Wasn’t Ava’s fault. Never blamed her. He hurt for her.

Louise found the bit of paper and freaked out, yes. It was Ava’s paper. Evidence. And Louise was shrieking. And Jerry heard.

Everybody heard. He remembers making Flo and Hettie stay in the kitchen, hide under the table if you need to (the screen door is banging, Lydia is gone like a puff of air at the first sign of trouble; wish she’d taken Flo and Hettie this time). Hettie had already been sniffling, and he’d left the kitchen.

Bang.

He’d gotten between Ava and their father.

He would have killed them both; that look in his eye. There wasn’t love or affection in that gaze. There wasn’t recognition of his children. There was just rage. That’s a look he wished he could forget; of all the things lost in the confetti, he wants to know why that moment that Jerry looked at him and Ava (Ava was bleeding, can’t remember why) is still there?

Then it’s a blur. Then there’s nothing.

Then he joins the military. He walks away entirely, with only what he can carry and doesn’t leave any parting words because there’s nothing to be said.

No. Something happens before that.

Ava packed her car, yes, packed in Hettie and Flo, suitcases and boxes, and at the last minute Lydia materialises into the passenger seat, whilst their mother tries to … beg? Yell? Ava’s face is black and blue and bandaged, and there was someone he knew who could fix that, with Mary Poppins’ bag…

Then Ava drives off, and their mom is crying, and he walks straight to the nearest recruitment office even though he doesn’t graduate for another three months because once the bomb has gone off, there’s no taking it back.

—

What was the bomb again?

Bomb. Which bomb?

Ava’s, not the one that… not the other one.

Paperwork from Planned Parenthood. There was a baby, but Ava’s already raising her sisters, so she sucked it up, stole $500 from their father’s study, and took care of it. She’d thrown the money back in their father’s face, money she got from her own account, and their father had punched her so hard he broke her nose and her orbital bone, and then it gets blurry again.

His body stings and aches and itches. He recites all the swears he knows in his head, and a few he doesn’t, and he wishes everything would put itself right again.

Bang.

—

The other bomb. That’s why he’s here, in the VA hospital. The one that was strapped to a little boy who ran up to one of the guys in his unit, grinning and clutching a soccer ball to hide the shape obscuring his torso.

Bang.

Bombs don’t sound like ‘bang’ either. They are a vacuum of noise and pain and detritus and fire and he now knows the sound-taste-smell of roasted human fresh.  They are wiping out all but two members of a unit and a little boy who didn’t have a choice or an idea of what he was getting into.

The images are burnt onto his brain forever; when he closes his eyes, all he sees is a face roast black and splitting open to reveal the ruby red of the blood and muscle underneath, leaking clear and yellow fluid.

Empty, black eye sockets staring, just sticky blackened holes.

Bodies arched and twisted in pain, looking like blacked trees and burnt bark until you remember where you are and what you’re looking at and some of that burnt bark flesh is your own.

He wishes those memories would disappear.

Less than a year in the army, and already medically discharged. So much for an escape plan. Has to be a record, shortest army career in Whitlock family history. Shorter even than Uncle Wyatt’s, but Wyatt was smart enough to die outright, so it’s just a damn tragedy instead of a humiliation. He knows how the game is played.

Fuckin’ Whitlock curse comes for all of them eventually.

The skin graft hurts like hell, and the medication is still scrambling him, and even when the doctors have pulled out every last stitch, he still looks like some kind of monster pieced together from leftovers. There are still scars, dozens of scars. He asks when they’ll go, but the doctors just brush over his question - plastic surgery is the most solid of answers, but nobody wants to commit to an answer, so he guess he has it. This is how he looks now.

They fill his pockets with pills and send him on his way with their gratitude for his service, as if he has somewhere to be, someone to go to. He’s got nearly ten months of army pay just sitting there - minus a chunk that confuses him until he remembers he’s been sending money to Ava, a neat row of transactions he’s simply labelled ‘miss you’.

Should’ve sent her more.

He stays in Houston, doesn’t bother going home. There’s nothing there for him - his sisters are gone; Ava’s in Austin for college with the girls. Ava, who is somehow juggling three sisters, a college degree, probably a part-time job, and all her own pain.

Maybe he should go to Ava. But the idea of dragging himself all the way to Austin, to sleep on a couch or something, and have his sisters see this ruined version of him makes him want to hide.

The idea of his shaking hands, and the crisscross of scars, and limp being seen by sweet Hettie, dear Flo, sharp Lydia, and tired Ava; knowing they’ll hear his uneven pacing, his wild panic, his endless nightmares makes him stay away - he can’t even pick up the phone. He failed them so many times, and he can’t expect them to put him back together now. Ava’s got nothing left for herself, the others are too young; Lydia’d be graduating this year, she doesn’t need a fuckin’ ghoul of a brother hovering in the background after everything she went through. Better they remember him as he was, as the name on a receipt, that whatever he is now.

His mother is probably still there; working too many hours at the VA hospital and burning toast and being tired. She wrote to him once or twice after he left, and he hated how those letters made him feel. They were all messy apologies and excuses and blame and misery framed in the day-to-day monotony of her life. He felt her hollowness at being left, the mother of five with no children in her home. She should have been helping Lydia pick a prom dress, arranging her graduation party and college tours; driving up to visit Ava at college; sending him inedible cookies; dropping Flo off on her first date, and spoiling baby Hettie even though she’s almost in middle school. But she couldn’t. Because they’d all walked away.

He didn’t write back. He was too angry then, and now he’s … nothing. She feels like a ghost to him, like she died the first day Jerry hit him, and she slowly faded away every Tuesday after that.

And Ava’s the only name on his paperwork, for next of kin and power of attorney shit; and that’s only so she could have his money when he was gone.

His father’s still in Sheldon, he has no doubt of that. He hopes Jerry dies in that empty old house, abandoned by everyone he should have loved better, cared for better and surrounded only by the bottles that he let salt the earth and poison his family.

His uncles are still there, as reliable as the rising and setting of the sun, most likely ready and waiting to jeer at Jasper for his wasted attempt as a soldier, for his patchwork of skin and scars, for his limp and his confetti memory; to fail so fantastically after ten lousy months. No diploma, no future, no plan.

Not even old enough for a fuckin’ drink.

Still a better shot than Bo, though. Sometimes he wants to ask them, though, to look ‘em in the eye and demand to know what they expected from him - the sole Whitlock boy, the heir to a name that meant sweet fuck-all these days - when all they did was punch him when he was down? That letting a kid get beat up, then get insulted and demeaned and mocked and yelled at… that didn’t create a good man, that didn’t create a happy, successful person. They did everything they damn well could to see him gone, failed, erased and that was before he joined the goddamn army. There was no brotherhood in the Whitlock name. Even if he had gotten out unscathed, he would have run til no one knew him, and he wouldn’t have gone home again.

But he didn’t, and here he is having bitter arguments with old men who aren’t even there.

He sits in his motel room, takes his pills with water from the bathroom, and occasionally remembers to find food. He doesn’t sleep well on the hard, musty motel bed; the nightmares come in waves even when his brain is like mush from the medications. A car door slamming, a yell from the street, the smell of cooking meat - it all sends him skittering, panicking, pacing. He can’t stop moving, and his bad knee swells up and finally he gets his hand on some liquor and he ends up slung into the stained bathtub barely able to think. Definitely not able to stand.

He just wants it to stop.

The mostly-empty bottle hits the grimy tiles and smashes, but he thinks of a girl with amber eyes and a magic bag and a watch that she gave him - hurled at him. He remembers sleeping on a cold, bony shoulder in an alley, her voice sweet and warm.

She was so mad with him that last night. He did end up back behind Dewey’s again, on more than one Tuesday, but he didn’t see her again. And it wasn’t long after that when everything went to hell, so he never got to say goodbye. Say sorry for being a dick.

He can’t quite remember what they were arguing about that last night. Whiskey and valium have chased that memory away, and his head slumps over as he sleeps. Or looses consciousness. Either way, he doesn’t have to exist for awhile, and it suits him just fine.

—

Time passes. He finds a cheaper motel, because there’s a corner of his brain that is somehow still functional and practical, and he knows what money he has has to be stretched. Someone from the VA calls his cellphone and he ignores it. He takes his pills - less than usual, because they’re running out.

His knee hurts.

He breaks a lamp and the mirror after a nightmare, and ends up at urgent care getting his knuckles stitched up by some intern who asks him too many questions.  Tries to give him pamphlets, and he resists the urge to punch the doctor in the face.

The doctor does write him new prescriptions though. That’s helpful. And he gets something to eat at the cafeteria. It starts out as a bad night and ends up being one of those mornings he almost feels human, as long as he doesn’t look in the mirror.

That’s why he picks up the phone when the VA call again.

That’s how he finds himself sitting outside the VA hospital with a paper bag of the shit he left behind. His mother’s letters, his dog-tags, and an extremely broken watch.

“Happy freakin’ birthday.”

He looks at it closely now, more closely than he did when he was given it - even if it was thrown at his head, it was a gift in his mind. The brown leather strap is stained and nearly torn through, and the brass buckle bent. The face is cracked in an almost perfect spiral. The face is mottled cream, with neat gold Roman numerals; several have come loose and rattle along the bottom, along with the minute hand. It no works, and he hopes that the internal gears are still functional.

The watch will need to be repaired professionally, to be taken apart and pieced back together. A new glass face and band, the numerals and hands put back in the rightful place.

He doesn’t even remember wearing it, that last day. He knew he had it with him the entire time, through basic training and everything, but he didn’t remember wearing it. He’d had some chunky digital thing that told him the weather and GPS and shit that had been responsible for the mutilation of his left wrist.

Carefully it into his jacket, Jasper stands and begins the walk back to the motel.

Nineteen, still.

Sometimes, he thinks about going back to Dewey’s, just to see if she ever turns up again, on a Tuesday. For some reason, when he thinks of her - Miss Alice, in her funny clothes, and her lilting voice - he thinks of her exactly how he remembers her, that she is fixed in time and will never change. That he could return to that alley a week, a year, a decade from now, and she will still be there with her bag of tricks and big golden eyes.

He thinks about her a lot. He never knew where she came from, how old she was, why she spent Tuesday nights in an alley with him. He hopes she’s safe, comfortable, and happy.

He hopes she still thinks of him.

Time marches on, and he can see his twentieth birthday rushing up to greet him. He’s done nothing to change his circumstances - the cheapest hotel room, a fistful of pills on an empty stomach, patchwork sleep haunted by corpses. The PTSD special.

He finds a bar that respects his service more than his age, and they’re happy to let him drink himself numb in the corner as long as he doesn’t make trouble, and slips out the back if the cops come round. But even when they do, and get a good look at the scars, at his jacket, at the look in his eyes, they usually just nod and move along. No one asks questions, just counts out his crumpled money and then slides his drink along the bar.

Life doesn’t feel worth much on those nights.

Stumbling back to the motel, drunk and dull, he never notices the footsteps. He just goes to his room, his home, and passes out on a stained bedcover fulling clothed, waiting for the nightmares to kick in.

—

When the nightmares press in on him, and he’s lying on the bed staring at the discoloured popcorn ceiling, all he really wants is to go home again.

Not to Sheldon.

To the ranch.

Before Hettie, before Tuesdays, before everything. Where they buried Socrates under the tree with the treehouse, where he learned to ride, and would catch rabbits, and everything was easy. He still got told off by his father for being such a disappointment, but back then, they still had the family property, so his father wasn’t so angry.

He’s stone cold sober - aside from the Vicodin and Valium rattling around in his stomach - when he decides to go home again. He even stops in at a grimy diner and shovels in a plate of eggs and some coffee before he buys the bus ticket.

He knows the old place never sold; bank couldn’t shift it. Sold some of the land, but the old farmhouse just sits there, rotting. The Whitlock curse strikes again and again, into the heart of everything.

It’s a long trip; only way out there by bus is to go via San Antonio, and then down towards the old farm on another rural bus that only runs a few times a day. And he didn’t think much about how to get from the last bus stop to the old house proper, but some old guy in a truck takes a good hard look at him - his stained jacket, his limp, the scars twisting around his limbs and under his clothes, and offers to take him wherever he’s going.

He’s stiff and sore and hungry, but he doesn’t worry about any of that. The driver’s polite, amicable, doesn’t ask too many questions but gives him the number of the only cab in town for his return trip. He nods his thanks, and begins limping up the old driveway, towards home.

The house is… sad. Not like his memories, of blood red geraniums in the window boxes, and a pile of sneakers and boots in a jumble by the front door. There aren’t any bikes leaning up against the porch railings, either. Hell, the porch has a hole in it, the wooden rotten through. The yard is an overgrown tangle - probably concealing a few snakes.

The treehouse has long since collapsed, the wooden remains jutting out from the overgrown grass like a shipwreck. Socrates’ little grave is probably still there, under it all, with the brick he and Lydia painted his name on. He was a good cat.

He’s not going to go into the house, and now that he’s here, he’s not sure why he came at all. It’s just a house he once lived in, like Sheldon. But there is something peaceful about being back here, sitting on the - thankfully brick - front steps and staring out at the road. No cars come by, neighbours are too far away to matter. It’s just him.

He lets his thoughts float. More than once, he’s wished he’d been able to keep his service weapon, finish the job the bomb started. He thought about other ways - swallowing all his pills till there’s nothing left in the bottle; buying some razor blades and cutting along his seams; finding a motel with rafters he can loop a belt around. But he doesn’t. He hasn’t. He doesn’t know why - the thought is like a mischievous cat looming over his shoulder. The cat with a too-big smile, from Hettie’s books. Sinister yet convincing and trustworthy. But the thought lingers, and right now, he wishes he’d come prepared because … it’s quiet here. It’s quiet and he associates it with good things, and he’s really, really tired.

His VA shrink said that disassociation was a common symptom of PTSD. There were methods of dealing with it, techniques he could use, but he didn’t bother remembering them. Sometimes it was nice not to feel things, to be entirely seperate from himself for awhile.

When he comes back to himself, the afternoon has turned to night, and he’s an idiot sitting outside an abandoned farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, in a town with one cab. He swears under his breath, and the two braincells that are still desperately trying to keep him alive blaze into action, as he fumbles for his cellphone.

At least it isn’t dead.

He doesn’t even notice the sound as he dials, but as the phone rings he looks up in confusion, as a woman walks up the drive. She’s small enough for his heart to jump in misguided hope, waiting for that smile, those eyes, and that stupid bag that he placed so much faith in.

Her eyes are red, and her hair is long and brown. Her lips stretch too far like that stupid cat, and she takes the phone from him so gently and crushes it into a find powder. And he wishes he’d stayed drunk and high instead of staying sober and coming back to his childhood home like some kind of fucking book character.

She calls him ‘mi amor’ and apologises for what comes next.

He tries to back away, but stumbles on his bad knee, and when she hurls him back up effortlessly, she dislocates his shoulder and probably breaks his arm, and for a moment his vision swims and he yells, and that is only the very beginning of the pain.

—

In his few lucid moments over the next seventy-two hours, he wonders when he gets to stop suffering. When he finds the end of the tunnel of pain, from Tuesdays behind Dewey’s, to being half-burned alive, to be put back together and drugged senseless to function, to whatever this woman has done to him.

It feels kind of like the bomb did, except like it is taking him slowly. If he could open his eyes, he’d expected himself to be blackened and splitting, like the crust of a volcano.

If he could be sick, he would.

He thinks he screams himself hoarse. He might just think about doing it.

Red eyes watch him the entire time, with the ruby-coloured too-big smile, and if he still believed in god or fate or family curses or anything aside from the slow drip of pain in this veins, he would think she was the devil incarnate.

—

Time passes. He doesn’t know how much, since he woke up in the rotting remains of his family’s home with a burn in his throat, and Maria waiting for him. She’s quick to reassure him of his new status as a god, quick to find him something to quench the burn (the boy is young but strong and bulky; probably a high school football player. Healthy and full of blood and cries for his momma when Jasper half-rips his throat out. She is quick to caress his cheek and to kiss him long and deep and to fuck him in the wreckage of the house.  

Maria’s clan is small - only nine of them counting him. They are suspicious of him, of the way he stares and stays quiet. But Maria is quick to ease any of his own misgivings - newborns are entirely unpredictable, volatile. He is her new pet, her treasure, her mijo.

He loves what he is, truly. He leaves the pill bottles rattling in his pockets in the dirt of the farmhouse floor, and strides confidently after his new mistress. His leg is strong again, and all the scars have melted away into smooth, hard stone. He came to the farm looking for something, and he found it - himself, the way he was always supposed to be. If life had been kinder.

He’s found himself a soldier in another war, but war is a lot easier when you aren’t weighed down with equipment or fear or stupid fucking rules. When winning a battle means glutting yourself on blood, and losing means instant death, and there’s nothing in-between.

They are so fast now, hunting grounds stretch from Monterrey to Corpus Christie to San Antonio.

He refuses to go to Austin but sometimes its hard to remember why. He nearly kills Lucy when she tries to take the others to Austin, and Maria’s lips purse but she says nothing and they go to Laredo instead. They create a few more newborns, but he notices Maria’s attention to him never wavers; they are like pets, whilst he is her devoted prince.

(Later, he’ll find out it was only six god-damned months he lost. That he turned twenty and Lydia graduated somewhere in an Austin high school, and a bunch of people - mostly social workers and VA employees - were looking for him with the fear of the worst. He’d tell them that whatever ‘worse’ was, they weren’t even close.)

They figure out his gift during one furious early battle that leaves his arms and neck littered with bite marks, and they don’t go away. The venom works too fast, the bites are too deep, and he is once again a mess. A monster. His rage ripples around the camp, and everyone huddles in on themselves, and even Maria cowers a little, cooing and trying to settle him.

He makes them afraid, he makes them tremble, he tries to force them into fixing the unfixable.

Maria is so pleased with his gift, he is never punished for his tantrum. And more bite marks layer upon his skin; when he frets over them, with a sneer on his face, she laughs and promises he’ll have many, many more before they are done.

—

Nineteen, always.

Reconnaissance in the back of Houston is required, and Jasper and Maria take a small group with them. Maria is insistent there are others on their lands, and that is a crime of the highest order. They will destroy the newcomers, feed, and return to Monterrey. They each pick a point of Houston, and agree to meet in the centre.

He is ordered to the northeast, and he goes without resistance; he knows soldiering is following orders, and Maria lets his resistance to Austin go unremarked upon.

Most of his human memories are hazy, like they are so very much older than they really are. The streets he stalks are almost familiar, and he keeps his head low - more because of the blazing red of his eyes than any fear of being recognised.

There’s an aged but enticing aroma that he follows, that smells of nice, soft things; not fresh enough to guarantee a confrontation (or execution), but one that is a regular in this part of town.

It’s late enough there are few people in the street, in this working-class part of town. Even the dive bar has gone dark, and only the drunks and shift workers are left stumbling around. It’s not even hard to snag one of the less aware drunks around the wrist and vanish around into the alley with him.

His blood is nothing memorable, and it’s not hard to make the drunk look like he tripped and slashed his neck on a smashed bottle in the alley. He’s good at staging these scenes; at making things look like terrible, despicable accidents.

“Oh, Jasper.”

The words are soft and murmured, and he can’t decide whether they are sad or relieved or something in between. All he knows is that there is a sweet-smelling threat behind him, and he spins around with a snarl.

She’s only as tall as a child, with uneven black hair curling around her cheeks. She’s one of the prettiest girls he has ever seen, with huge amber-coloured eyes that remind him of porcelain dolls. She’s wearing a sky blue sweater a size too big over jeans with stars on the knees, and staring at him with hope and regret.

In the back of his brain, that little bit that is not quite human and not quite animals looks at her hard and breathes in her roses-and-rainwater scent and simply thinks, “Yes. Good.”

But the louder part recognises her as the trail he has been following, the one that Maria wants destroyed. A growl rumbles from within him, and the girl just looks sad.

“I’m so, so sorry Jasper,” she says, still standing there, not the least be defensive. “Carlisle and Edward forced me to stay away once you left, and then I tried to watch you but I lost track of where you were…” Her eyes are shiny, as if she wants to cry. “Do you remember who I am?”

The question hangs in the air between them, his growl fading away as he stares at her.

She steps closer, and he glares at her. The animal brain is getting louder - “Yes-good-yes-good-yes-good.” Her emotions are threatening, mostly sad, and she’s tiny. Nothing bad could be so dainty and pretty.

She’s right in front of him, standing on her toes as she presses her hand to his face. “I’m Alice,” she says simply, and his mind folds itself over and over again in an instant to provide him with an answer to this riddle, to this girl that is so clearly something good and known to him.

And he remembers.

“Are you okay?”

“It’s a stupid fucking decision you’re about to make.”

“At least I didn’t break it worse.”

“Happy freakin’ birthday.”

"They just looked nice. Happy.”

“I’ve come too far to watch you die in this disgusting place,”

“Alice,” he says hoarsely, and his memories of her are clear, sharp. He can remember that one strand of hair that always fell into her face; her ice cold hands roughly patching him up; the constant, lilting companionship of her voice, even when he slept. She is so clear in his mind he wonders how he forgot her in the first place.

Her smile and emotions bloom with joy all at once, and it warms him all the way through. It’s the kind of happiness that eluded him during his human life, and one he has not felt, waking up with this gift that feels like everyone’s emotions are constantly crawling on him. It’s something he wants to wrap himself in like armour.

“I’m so, so sorry,” her fingers brush a scar on his neck so gently, he wants to shudder.

“What for?” he asks, wanting to know if he can touch her. She’s so pretty and clean and is a good thing, a precious thing.

“I see things. Things that are going to happen,” Alice says, as she inspects his arm with a frown. “And when I saw what was going to happen to you in the army, I got mad that I couldn’t protect you anymore. And when you came home, I didn’t realise she was following you until it was too late and I couldn’t work out where you’d ended up. I would have come sooner if I’d known, I swear.” She turns his arm over to reveal a bite mark on his wrist and impulsively kisses it.

He flinches; the contact magnifies her emotions - and his - and it skitters pleasantly along his body.

“I don’t…” he begins, his voice still gravelly from lack of use. “I don’t blame you.”

“I do,” she replies softly, and then she backs away and that is disappointing enough that he takes a step closer to her. She giggles and smiles at him again, and he will follow her anywhere.

“You have to make a choice now,” she says, and he nods hypnotically.

“You can go back to Maria,” her voice wavers again, and he doesn’t like the coldness that sweeps through her at that statement. “And fight and kill until she’s bored with you. She creates war and destruction and monsters, Jasper, and I don’t want you to go with her. She will destroy you, and I couldn’t bear it if…” She stops, turning her head away and stays silent for a moment.

“Or,” her voice is steady again, “you can come with me.”

She holds out her hand.

“My brothers and sisters are distracting Maria and her friends for now, you and I can get away, and go somewhere safe,” she continues. “Just you and me together. I can…”

He never knows what she was going to say because his choice is made, his hand taking hers without a second thought, and she stares up at him with wide eyes, her mouth a perfect ‘o’.

“Are you sure?” she manages, and he nods. He thinks of pain, human and immortal. He thinks of rage and regret. He thinks of his lowest point as a human, of the permanent bite marks on his arms, and the weight that has only shifted now that he’s immortal, not lifted away.

He thinks of being happy and safe and clean and peaceful. He thinks of a girl sitting next to him in an alley, with her throat burning, but her only worry about his bruises.

The girl who can back for him.

Everything is still muddled, from his human life, but he knows that lot of people took him apart and remade him in both his lives. She’s the only one who tried to heal him.

“Let’s go,” he says, and she laughs sweetly, and then they are running faster than anyone can see as they disappear into the night.

—

‘Home’ is a cabin in the middle of the forest, somewhere towards the north east, he thinks. No people around, just wild animals for him to glut himself on. There is the constant running of the river beside them, covering their scent against nomads. It is quiet here - a good place to figure out the edges of his gift, to learn resistance and control, to try and heal and reconcile all that happened to him in such a short space of time.

Alice tells him Maria was indescribably desperate after his disappearance; their exit covered by a well-time rainstorm that washed all the scents away. She had torn apart Houston in her fury, and now she was in more trouble than she knew.

Meaning that Maria wouldn’t come hunting for him any time soon. And, he supposes, when she does, Alice will know. Alice knows everything.

She knows that he likes to sit on their front steps and just stare out at the forest without being disturbed. That the scent of smoke and fire sends him twitching worse than any vampire she’s ever met. That the scars that mark his arms, neck, and face are simply placeholders for the ones he gained as a human, and his disgust over them lingers from the injuries he suffered in war. That he misses his sisters, and they are one of the reasons he is so resolute in his control training. That, if nothing else, he will say good bye and fake his death to give them closure. Alice promises him that she knows someone who can help them figure all those kinds of details out, but she wants him to see his sisters one last time almost as badly.

He knows that Alice loves him, as truly as anyone has loved before. That feeling never wavers, not through his rages, his depressions, his disassociation. That just watching him read a book on their (broken) couch has joy blooming inside her. He knows that Alice will never pressure him, never ask him for more than he is ready to give - and because of that, he is willing to give her anything she asks.

Some days are harder than others, especially when Alice talks to him about her family - the one she walked away from for him - and he knows that she wants the both of them to return to the Cullens sometime in the future. And he feels obliged to do it, eventually, since her jumble of siblings were a part of his escape plan - the most dangerous part, if it involved aggravating Maria. But she never asks, just talks to him about them.

But mostly, he’s okay. Good, even. Animal blood is disappointing, and sometimes he’s so agitated he can’t sit still and wishes for … a battle, to run, to do something other than sit, and read, and hunt animals, and talk. Alice blames it on his newborn year, and he tries so hard to contain it, but it’s hard.

She tries to make it better, and on days that he can stand to be touched, she teaches him all the old-fashioned dances she knows, and he spins her around and sometimes it does make it better.

He’s got regrets, a laundry list of them, but Alice says that isn’t unusual; it takes very specific circumstances to be changed - especially young - and be satisfied with the final outcome. When he asks her regrets, she shrugs and admits that she doesn’t even remember being human. Leaving him unprotected is her biggest regret, and that makes her sad, which he doesn’t like the feeling of.

So he puts his arm around her, and she curls against him, and that makes the sadness evaporate, and she beams up at him with golden eyes he could drown in, and one thing he will admit is - that despite the pain and unhappiness that followed him from human to immortal - that he will never, even regret taking her hand.

[alexistudies]

How to Conquer A Math Class

hey everyone, thanks for 4k followers! time to celebrate with masterposts. Btw, thanks to @coco-study for the pink calculator icon :) lets get it poppin’

Disclaimer: ya girl is trash at math but uh...i’ve made it this far and this is all based on personal experience ;; hopefully it helps!

1. Know your learning style and use it to your advantage.

There are believed to be 4 learning types: read/write, auditory, kinesthetic, and visual. If you do not know your learning type, find out here! Note: most people usually don’t have one learning type, one is just more dominant than another. Here are some tips tailored to your learning type:

Read/Write: copy your notes, try reading the textbook, rewrite all practice problems, try to condense all the important information onto one sheet.

Auditory: listen to lectures, read your lecture notes aloud and record yourself so you can listen to it later, talk yourself through how to do the problem (i.e., I do the power rule which is multiplying the coefficient by the power, then...), participate in class discussions

Kinesthetic: find ways to apply the concepts to real life, walk around or move while reviewing notes/practice problems, chew gum while doing practice problems, teach others.

2. Complete math homework as soon as you can after lecture.

On my first Calculus 2 exam, I got a 42% big yikes. My class was Mon/Tue/Thur and I wasn’t doing my homework for last week’s lesson until the night it was due, Monday nights. I realized that this probably wasn’t effective and began to do my math homework the night after the lesson was taught on a huge whiteboard in an empty classroom. My next test score was 68%. Talk about character development!

3. And if you can’t do your homework within a few hours of lecture, review and annotate your notes.

Even after I adapted my study habits for math after my first exam, there were still days when I didn’t have the time to do my homework afterwards or I just didn’t feel like it. So, I would go through my notes and annotate them, explaining in further depth how to complete a problem or just coming up with general steps for problems of that type. I would also identify any questions I had and make a note to get an answer in the next lecture or at office hours.

4. Use other resources outside of your class to study/review!

My math professor this semester wasn’t terrible, but I just didn’t learn the way he taught. This semester was a lot of self-learning through other resources. My top ones were Professor Leonard, Khan Academy, Pauls Online Math Notes, and Symbolab. I’m pretty sure Chegg will make this list once I find someone to split it with lmao

Not only do those resources help me a TON, but I also just type in the topic and see what other colleges’ resources come up. Half the time, I end up on UC Berkeley’s math notes page and its great. Or a high school AP teacher’s math page.

Exposing yourself to other notes will also diversify your math palette on how many types of problems you can do, ranging in difficulty and types of numbers you could encounter.

5. Have two separate notebooks: one for in class lecture notes, one for rewritten lecture notes and homework.

GOD, I wish I had done this for Fall 2018 because sHEESh but I’m going to do this for next semester. Doing this will give you the space to have messy notes, then reorganize them without wasting loose leaf paper. And it will just help you keep all of your neat, understandable notes in one place without needing an extra folder, binder, etc.

6. Try to change your relationship with math.

Okay, to be quite f*****g honest, I can’t stand math. BUT, I have to work on my mindset because as long as I continue to believe that I am bad at it/ that math is hard/that math is pointless/WHATEVER, I will always let it win. So, if this is how you feel, try to see it as something that is interesting and try to find the fun in it. Math is universal and that’s a beautiful thing. Its like food but lowkey way less enjoyable (see, gotta change the mindset). Its all mental.

i hope this was somewhat helpful and please send me an ask if you have any questions about math classes and such! more masterposts to come and thank you so much for 4k followers :)

[actualshinguujicockrekiyo]

alone

a/n : so before chapter 6 ( 5 if you’re not paid ) comes out , i rushed to write this in case crwby disproves my headcanons haha . hope they’re not related in canon because that’d be oof - this was originally a rewrite of this , it was so cringy reading it back .... hope i improved w --

warnings : non-explicitly described death , or well , a corpse , volume 3 chapter 11 spoilers for rwby

word count : 1304

ao3 link

feedback appreciated !!! ( most under the cut )

“Neo!”

The wind seemed to carry his yell closer to her, or maybe it was just her imagination, just her hearing his voice over and over again in her ears as she flew through the sky like a failed version of Mary Poppins. She tried to maneuver past the Grimm, kicking and attempting to whack them with her parasol that was still wide open. The wind that hit her face roughly prevented her from seeing everything, thus making her less coordinated and despite the fact that she could still beat the Grimm, she was still scared about landing right into the jaws of one. A few torturous minutes – that had essentially seemed like hours – later, she finally managed to scramble her parasol shut, no longer floating, but falling instead. It was better though, she seemed to be falling faster than the pace the Grimm were flying at her. She used that pace to her advantage – kicking herself off from some of the horrendous monsters that failed to catch up with her later. And only when she was closer to the ground did she finally open up her parasol again for a flawlessly executed landing.

A shaky exhale hesitantly left her mouth as she gripped her parasol tightly. The scarce amount of people around her seemed too busy with fighting off the Grimm Cinder had released to notice her wandering stare. She ignored everyone who might’ve seen her, not like they could do anything to her, and tried to not think too negatively, as to not attract Grimm to her. And despite her knowing Roman was fully capable of taking down Ruby, it was still hard.

Especially after seeing the ship they had stood on descending onto the ground with a large explosion.

She saw it, she saw it while she was falling down, of course she did. It was loud, it was flashy and the sheer force of it seemed to make the area shake. That’s why so many Grimm had gathered around her. But she couldn’t use gravity to her advantage if she wasn’t falling, that’s why she tried to replace her negative emotions with more positive ones.

He was going to be okay.

With a light gasp, she checked to see if her scroll was still in her back pocket, a delighted glint in her eyes appearing after realizing that it was still there. Her breath hitched though, once she took it out, seeing as to how there were no new messages from Roman. She inhaled. This was okay, this didn’t mean anything.

To Roman <3 : hey, you beat her yet?

She stared at the screen for a second, eyebrows furrowed as her petite hands clutched the scroll with more denseness than they really should’ve. Her pupils darted to the image she had set for his contact, him trying to cover the camera with his hand, eyeliner all messed up. Thinking that the same man she had known for so long might be hurt right now because of her stupid parasol made her heart sink. Huffing, she lowered the hand that held the scroll and started walking towards the direction the ship seemed to crash land in. But not even a full minute passed before she raised her scroll up to her face again, only to be met with no messages. Her cheeks puffed.

To Roman <3 : i’m okay by the way haha, though that was quite the stunt don’t you think?

To Roman <3 : please reply, i’m worried

Her fingers typed away furiously, messages expressing her worry and fear for what might’ve happened to him. Of course, there was no guarantee his scroll was just wasn’t the only victim of that incident, but she had this itching feeling in the back of hear head, that after years upon years of survival, he was….

Hand running through Neo’s hair, she picked up the pace, feet quickly carrying her where she thought the rubble would be, heels hitting the ground loudly. The further she went, the more her stride quickened, face contorting into a grimace and eyes showing signs of desperation more and more.

Her pace slowed when she saw the broken off pieces of the airship, signaling that she was about here and at this moment she wasn’t quite sure if she wanted to find anything, if she wanted to know what happened to Roman. The dust settled, signs of evaporated Grimm mixing in with the clouds of dirt. It felt like she was in an entirely different planet in general, with how dark and quiet it seemed to get all of a sudden. Steps slowing even more as she slipped her scroll back into the back pocket of her pants and taking in her surroundings. Scrap, and metal, and remains of the ship littered the ground wildly. No one could survive a fall like this… No one, but Roman, Neo thought, he was a survivor.

Her head turned left and right, her size not making this easy at all. She prayed silently to whatever god there was, whatever god had failed them before, wishing they would listen to her prayers now, wishing that they would at least leave Roman alone, that they could at least let him be okay. In the end, her prayers got interrupted by a sensation of something lightly hitting her stomach. She looked down, only to be met with a hat that was now fluttering down onto the ground. It almost seemed like her heart stopped beating.

Roman’s hat…!

Before the wind could blow it away again, she reached down to pick it up, trying to dismiss her trembling hand as she did. She didn’t need to bring it closer to her eyes to know that it was definitely his, there was no one here who could be wearing something like that. Lowering the hat, she finally picked up something motionless in the distance, something that didn’t belong, a spot of orange making it stand out. She bit down the inside of her cheek and broke into a sprint to close the already small distance, coming to regret her decision fairly quickly. It would’ve been better if she hadn’t even seen the sight.

She would’ve still thought…she would’ve still had hoped that Roman was still alive if she wouldn’t have seen the corpse. She had witnessed enough dead bodies to know when a person wasn’t breathing anymore, when their chest was rising, at least a little. And she thought she wasn’t sensitive to that anymore.

Oh, how wrong she was.

Her lips parted, shoulders slumping and breath hitching in dismay. She suddenly felt as if someone was bashing her head in, her sight blurring, legs failing to keep her up as she stumbled and eventually dropped to her knees before him. She swallowed the vomit building up in the back of her throat, the sight was enough of a mess. She gently put her parasol down, her hand moving to his cold body to shake it gently. Maybe…just maybe he’d wake up. This was a joke, this was all a joke. He couldn’t be dead, it wasn’t fair! She kept shaking his body, the bottom of her lip trembling, and eventually, she stopped, her head dropping onto his chest, meeting with the silent absence of his non-beating heart as her eyes pooled with tears. Her hands gripped the fabric of his dirtied coat, trying her hardest to hold onto the only light that prevented her life from being living hell. But that light has now faded right in front of her, no amount of tears being able to bring him back, no amount of grief that was able to get rid of the burning guilt sitting in the bottom of her gut. If only she was there….

If only she wasn’t all alone now.

[stoportotouch]

How was the Utopia at the festival? The G&S society of facebook is in chaos over it and I would love to hear about it from someone vaguely sane (it sounds a little like EssGee Utopia which is like, galaxy brain levels of G&S)

to be honest you pretty much got it with essgee utopia and OH my god i love it

i went to see it on my own and the first thing i noticed when i walked in was “okay why the hell can i hear a glockenspiel and a piano in the orchestra pit, i might not know utopia that well but i know it well enough to know that neither of those instruments are present in the score”. Turns Out that the reason i head a glockenspiel and a piano was that the musical director had rescored the whole thing, in a modern musical theatre style, to better fit both the performers and the setting. when will your fave ever?

note on better fitting the performers: wmos is a musical theatre society, not an opera society, so vocally their style suits a more musical theatre (stephen turnbull deemed it bossa nova) style than the original music style. on top of that, they had a chronic lack of men, as sometimes Tragically Happens. there were no men in the initial portion of act i, and their chorus of men eventually totalled two (yeah.), with four male flowers of progress and two of the flowers of progress (i can’t tell them apart so don’t ask me to) commuted to women.

i should point out: rather than the usual flowers of progress, the flowers of progress were as follows:

kate middleton

prince william

prince andrew

prince charles (mr. goldbury)

camilla parker-bowles (the flower of progress who hangs out with mr. goldbury and the princesses during act ii)

prince harry (fitz)

this also meant that princess zara was implicitly meghan markle, but she kept the name zara. there were people who complained about it (“grumble grumble, mocking the royal family, would never have happened in the old d’oyly carte, grumble grumble”). but i’m going to guess those people have yet to work out the fact that gilbert and sullivan is, by nature, satirical. so those people don’t count.

other changes included lady sophy being mary poppins, rewriting lyrics of various songs, including “a wonderful joy our eyes to bless” being turned from casual racism into prince charles singing a love song in favour of camilla parker-bowles (which was HILARIOUS, and his impression was spot on). also one thing i particularly liked was the fact that this meant that the two younger princesses didn’t end up hooking up with men old enough to be their fathers, so a wonderful joy and the quartet were more paternal than they were creepy.

don’t get me wrong, i love the quartet because it’s the least dull part of a dull act of a dull show. but at the same time, it is just objectively creepy that these two guys are flirting with two extremely innocent and sheltered young women who are young enough to be their daughters. but i digress.

the gay report: scaphio and phantis (who i still can’t tell apart but i met the one who wants to marry a translucent woman and he was incredibly nice and really pleased to hear that somebody enjoyed his opera) got together at the end. also, and i thought this was nice, tarara was nonbinary. that’s just about it for Things Being Gay but it made me pretty happy. (and it’s pretty remarkable that this is one of the last things i am talking about rather than the first, since You Know Me.)

anyway, and i’m sure you have heard this by now, the f u c k i n g adjudicator absolutely destroyed them. i didn’t stay because frankly i don’t care to hear anybody’s opinions on a show i liked (although i do agree that the choral singing could have used work), but on top of the fact that he didn’t even nominate them for any awards let alone give them any during the adjudication he not only didn’t say anything good (and, objectively, even if you despised it in every other way, eagle high, which is a particularly difficult chorus, was excellent), but said that he wasn’t even going to comment on the principals. also people applauded when he completely ripped them apart.

now don’t get me wrong, me personally, if an adjudicator completely destroyed something i had spent months working on, i would just go more in the direction that he had hated next time around. you didn’t like my modern musical theatre utopia? well then, sir,

WELCOME TO MY FUCKING HEAVY METAL MIKADO, THAT YOU, FOOL THAT YOU ARE, BROUGHT DOWN DIRECTLY UPON YOUR OWN HEAD

but that’s just me, and because i am a self-confessed Petty, Opinionated Asshole, i can quite see that not everybody would amp up the Controversy all the way not just to eleven but to twenty while making direct and confrontational eye contact with the adjudicator.

(this is in much the same vein as the reason i was Fucking Mad when last year’s adjudicator described a company as being “too young”, too fucking young, because their average age was in their 30s. my response to this is next year: iolanthe with a cast made up entirely of seven year olds. celia (or leila) stares straight at the adjudicator when she says “no-one to look at you would think you had a son of twenty-four!”) somebody slightly less... i don’t know what the word is but there is one and it’s probably “stupid” or “self-destructive” than me would probably be more inclined to move away from the festival and not bring anything there, and it would probably discourage the majority of people with similar ideas from trying to present their ideas at the festival, because why bother if it’s just gonna be destroyed. but that’s an opinion for another post and, indeed, for another day.

anyway tl;dr i thought it was good although there were some bits that needed work as well as there being one or two jokes that didn’t land. however, the audience and adjudicator reaction to it is indicative of the wider problem with gilbert and sullivan as a whole. if i were teaching a highly specific class about Updating Theatre i would use it as a case study.