#like a year and a half ago id be sad and then id go get a burger and then id be like ugh i cant even be a vegetarian right

[grilledkatniss]

Local swiftie syndicate is officially on strike.

We were willing to go broke for the concert, we have nothing left for a movie ticket right now.

6k for a movie ticket is fucking absurd. 15k if you want the eras tour popcorn bucket with the seat.

[mareagirls]

OK this just hit me and if i wrote for joel id have a blast with this BUT

what if r and joel were out on a job somewhere or going to his storehouse outside the qz and instead of ellie being bitten and immune it’s r!!!!! the drama when she doesnt turn

LOL not me acting like you didn’t send me this request over a year ago, i’m so sorry it’s so late 😭 i hope you like it sweetheart. I’ll come back and check this for typos later!

> established relationship, established family dynamic, protective!joel, sad joel, sad ellie but she tries to hide it, sad reader but there is fluff and comfort and the end i promise

tws: reader asks joel to kill her (i'm not sure if this should be a tw but just incase!

I believe unconditionally in a free Palestine, and am aware that one of the creators of TLOU is a zionist. i do not support this and strongly encourage anyone reading this to engage with the link below!

how you can help Palestine

-

There’s a clicker snapping and snarling above you. You bring your arms up to keep it away from your face as you try to shove it off. Joel won't take the shot, you think, not when there’s a risk of hitting you.

With a final push of adrenaline, you manage to kick it up so it’s further off you. You scream out for Joel then, strangled.

“Fuck- Joel!"

The rippling bang of a gunshot pierces the air.

The thing on top of you goes slack, features still contorted in a gruesome snarl. You shove it off and scramble away, standing up as soon as you’ve put enough distance between you. Silence returns to the forest.

When you look up, you don’t find the relieved looks you’re expecting from either of your companions. Joel is looking at you, horror painted across his features as he stares at your arm.

You follow his gaze down.

Blood is leaking out of a clear bite mark just above your wrist. Your shirt and skin are shredded where the things teeth ripped into you. Red coats your hand, dripping thickly onto the ground.

Your legs go weak at the sight.

"Shit- shit, Y/N-" Ellie is panicking. She’s closer by, arms reaching out for you. You take a half step back, unwilling to let her get nearer, and her head snaps up. "It got you."

You all know what this means. It’s a death sentence. A promise that even if you’re not dead now, you will be very soon.

You look at Ellie with a wobbly smile that you know won't do much to placate her panic. She looks like she might cry and behind her, Joel has gone rigid - eyes wide, hands in tight fists by his sides. You don't know what's worse.

"It's alright, Ellie, sweetheart," you focus on trying to calm the girl down first. “It's okay. It's alright. You have to leave me here."

Before Ellie can retort, Joel stiffens.

"No- no." He collects himself, rolling his shoulders slowly as if to shake off the stupor. “That is out of the question.”

You think to yourself that denial looks devastating on him.

"Joel," his name is a broken supplication on your lips. "You need to take Ellie and get back to Jackson. She needs to be safe."

It’s low, reminding him of how dangerous the world is in an effort to make him focus, but Joel cares about keeping you and Ellie safe above anything else. Reiterating that he can’t protect everyone might hurt him, but it’ll keep them both alive long enough to forgive you.

You're shaking, you realise then. Tremors wracking your body as the adrenaline of the fight dissipates and leaves horror in it's wake. You glance at the bite again and a low wounded noise escapes you.

Joel steps forward, arms reaching out to comfort you instinctively, and you take two back, doing your best to avoid the hurt that flashes in his eyes. His voice is ragged when he next speaks, and Joel Miller has never been one to beg, but right now he’s sounding awfully close.

“Let us stay with you."

“The bite is in your arm, right?" Ellie regards you carefully. "You still have a few hours left. We can keep you company."

Shaking your head, you step further away.

"I don't want you to see me turn into one of those things."

“We’ll kill you before you get to that point.”

Ellie speaks matter of factly, but you don’t miss the way her hands flit anxiously at her sides. She’s tough, your girl, but you and Joel both know her tells better than you know yourselves. Behind all the snark and self assuredness, she’s a kid. You wont force her to watch another person she cares about succumb to cordyceps.

“Ellie,” you try to reason. “I don't want you to see me like that.”

You turn to Joel, expecting agreement, but he’s wiped his face clear of any emotion, inscrutable - you cant read him at all. He's putting his walls up, brick by brick in an attempt to hide how he feels. You don't blame him - you think you'd do the same were your roles reversed.

“We’ll stay with you, Y/N.” His runs a tired hand over his beard. “No infected or people 'round here for miles. We can set up camp. When the time comes...”

He trails off, like he can't bring himself to say the words.

And that's that.

-

Night falls.

Joel ties you up to a tree as a safety precaution, grunting a soft apology when he pulls the rope across your chest too tight and you wince.

Despite your protests, he bandages the bite, careful motions and gentle hands. He thumbs over it when he’s finished, more out of habit than reassurance. You doubt he even realises.

Ellie tries to crack some jokes, doing her best to alleviate the mood. You offer her a halfhearted smile in return but you can tell she's not convinced by it.

It all feels overwhelmingly pointless. Joel will have to kill you soon, and if he can’t, you’ll do it yourself. He's only delaying the inevitable by keeping you alive. When you try to tell him so - try to make it clear that he's just putting himself and Ellie in danger - the man’s shoulders go tight and he turns away from you.

You don't try to dissuade him again.

Now, Ellie is reading her comic by the gas lamp, eyes flickering to you every so often. You twist your body away from her as much as you can and stare into the dark of the woods. You don't want to risk her seeing you get sick. You want her to remember you healthy, smiling - not overcome by the infection.

Joel comes over to you with your water flask in hand and you shake your head. You shouldn't use up resources when you'll be dead soon. When you tell him as much, the man bites his lip but stays quiet. He doesn’t question you though - water is a valuable resource. He knows that just as well as you do.

"Shoot me the moment I start to turn." You murmur, quietly so that Ellie won’t hear you. Joel looks down at you, ashen. Some of the barriers that he’s put up since you were bitten fall away - you see glimpses of the Joel you know inside.

He’s afraid. Devastated. Doing his hardest to keep it together for you and Ellie.

"Y/N-"

"Promise me, Joel. Promise me you'll shoot me."

He swears it, and the words hang stagnant in the air between you.

You thank him before turning away again, raising your voice a little so that Ellie can hear you too when you next speak.

"Goodnight."

I love you both so much. I'm so honoured I got to love you. I'm sorry we didn't get more time. Keep eachother safe. I love you. I love you. I love you. I'm sorry.

It's easier than saying goodbye.

-

You wake with a start to the feeling of someone tapping your cheek.

It’s still dark, the gas lamp casting long and shifting shadows on the small clearing where you've set up camp, but all you can think about is the fact that someone is touching you.

Flinching back with a gasp, you snatch your bitten arm to your chest. Your eyes take a moment to adjust to what's around you.

Ellie and Joel are kneeling by your side, the latter's hands raised as to not spook you. You blink up at them, not understanding. When Joel tries to get closer, you curl in on yourself, the back of your head clipping against the tree and causing you to wince.

"It's alright,” Joel’s saying. “The infection didn't take. You're alright."

You can barely understand him past the rushing in your ears, still focused on the lingering feeling of his rough fingertips on your face.

"Why would you- Fuck, Joel. I'm fucking infected! Why would you touch me? " You're panicking, gasping between words. All you can think of is that Joel touched you and he could get infected too now and Ellie will be alone if you both get sick. She'll have to kill you both.

Joel looks like he wants to get closer, but when he tries, you make yourself as small as possible- knees up against your chest.

"Please, Joel- I don't want to hurt you."

The man shakes his head but doesn't try to come closer again. "You won't. You won't."

"You're still alright, Y/N," Ellie is kneeling on the other side of you. She picks up your injured arm and tugs off the bandage before you can stop her. "Look," she urges. "The infection hasn't taken."

Sure enough, the bite mark is still there, - angry and red and crusted with blood, but there aren’t any purpling veins expanding from it. No greenish hue indicating infection.

This is a trick, you think then. A cruel trick your mind is playing on you in your last moments of clarity. A sick manifestation of your survival instinct begging you to not lose hope.

“You’re not feverish,” Ellie continues. “You’re not coughing or vomiting.”

When you look back at Joel, he looks so convinced - more hopeful than you've ever seen him in the time you've known each other. Nothing else has ever given him that expression. Not the Firefly's promises of revolution, not the prospect of a cure. Joel Miller's thought processes have always been grounded in reality - stoic, stony, calculating.

But right now it looks more like those of the countless QZ kids who get drawn into the Firefly's ranks every year on promises of a better future. You want him to snap out of it. Want to remind him that idealism can only bring trouble- he taught you that.

"The infection hasn't taken yet, Y/N." Ellie is still speaking, small hands gripping yours. "It should have by now. You're still alright. Maybe you're immune like me."

You fight the urge to believe her. "Maybe it's just taking longer to spread.”

"And why the fuck would it do that?" Joel snaps at you, breathing in deep when you flinch at his tone. He runs a hand through his greying hair.

"I'm sorry, I’m sorry. I just- think about it, darlin'," the pet name he usually only reserves for the moments you're alone slips out. "Ellie is right. It should have spread by now. It's been hours."

And you are thinking about it, you are, but you also don't want to hold onto foolish hopes. The likelihood of you and Ellie both being immune feels unfathomable.

“Don’t give me this, Joel,” you say, quiet.

“Don’t give you what? Hope?”

“You promised you’d shoot me!”

Your voice rises, and you realise then how hysterical you sound. Joel’s hand moves to his chest, like it’s physically hurting him to hear you speak like this.

“I promised I’d shoot you when the infection set in. It hasn’t.” His tone is clipped, even, but his expression is anything but.

“So you’re telling me that you’re going to be able to look me in the eyes and put a bullet through my eyes when it does? After you’ve worked yourself up into the idea that I might fucking survive this?”

Surprisingly, Ellie is the most level headed, interceding between the two of you.

She speaks quietly, evenly. “We should just wait a bit more.”

You try to intercede but she stops you.

“No, Y/N. You’re tied up and you’re not getting sick right now. We should wait a few more hours.”

“Ellie-"

“I won’t lose someone else if I don’t have to.”

Your shoulders sag under the weight of what she's saying. Ellie leaves no room for argument. She wraps a clean bandage around your wound and brushes her thumb over it the same way Joel did last night. They’re so alike without even realising it. You tell yourself that at least they’ll have eachother when you’re gone.

A tentative voice whispers inside your head;

If you’re gone.

-

By the evening of the next day, nothing has changed.

Joel and Ellie have barely left your side, the former only disappearing into the woods for a half hour before returning with a few dead rabbits.

"You should try eat something.”

You don’t have an appetite. Haven’t since you were bitten, but Joel and Ellie keep looking at you like you’ll keel over if you don’t eat, so once he’s skinned and cooked the meant, you take what is given to you.

Your companions seem to have taken this new change in their stride, Ellie especially has come to terms with the idea of you possibly being immune very rapidly, but it’s a lot to wrap your head around. You flinch away whenever they get too close, and when Joel tries to untie you, you don’t let him.

“Y/N.”

“Please don’t.”

He swallows hard but nods.

That night you fall asleep still tied up against the tree. You’re woken by nightmares of rotting flesh.

You don’t shut your eyes again after that.

-

It takes three more days for you to let Joel touch you.

You let him untie you on the second because you’re painfully aware that your little group needs to keep moving. You’re unsure about whether you’re still heading for the Fireflies or if Joel has changed route and is taking you all back to Jackson, but you keep your distance either way, choosing to walk a few meters behind them at all times. You keep talking to a minimum, too overwhelmed and exhausted to say anything. Between the two of them, they make up for your lack of sound. Ellie chatters a lot anyway, and Joel answers all her questions, humouring her every joke. He’s filling in gaps that you’d usually contribute in you realise. Sometimes, their voices even drown out the noise in your head. It’s a pleasant distraction.

The next time you set up camp, Ellie goes straight to sleep. Something in her seems to have relaxed since you haven’t become infected. Joel is sat nearby, having offered to take first watch. His features soften when he doesn't think anyone’s looking. A small smile tugging at his lips as Ellie snorts and mumbles something in her sleep.

When he notices you staring, he offers you a tired smile.

“You should get some rest, sweetheart.”

Nodding, you get into your sleeping bag. You’re still not sure what to say and do, but if Joel thinks anything of your apparent immunity, he hasn’t shown it. He’s probably trying to let you rationalise and make peace with what’s happened on your own before he or Ellie give their input.

You try to sleep, you really do. But every sound the forest makes has you flinching, peering into the darkness, shifting in your sleeping bag restlessly.

You don't know if it's the overwhelming stress of the last few days, or the exhaustion, or something else entirely, but once you've started to cry, you can't stop. You try valiantly to smother the sound by clamping your hand over you mouth, but Joel has always been far too attentive for your liking. When the second sob leaves you, you hear him walk over. He stops in front of you, taking in your form (curled up in your sleeping bag, hand pressed against your lips, tears streaming down your face) and a small breath escapes him.

"Oh, my girl."

Before you can apologise, Joel is crouching down in front of you.

"Can I hold you?" His palms are up, open. He doesn’t mean any harm. He won’t hurt you, he never has. More importantly, you won’t hurt him.

Part of you wants to say no - still not used to the idea of being immune - but his proximity makes your skin sting and ache for contact, you're hurting almost with the absence of touch. After days of sitting so far away from Joel and Ellie with nothing but your jacket around you, you give in to him.

"Please."

It's all it takes. One minute Joel is still staring at you like he doesn't want to scare you off, and the next, he's pulling you firmly to his chest, sleeping bag and all.

He smells like pine. Feels like safety. When he presses his lips to the crown of your head, your sobbing intensifies.

"That's it, honey. Let it out. You're safe."

His arms are crowding you, but it doesn't feel stifling. It feels like coming home.

You shudder in his hold. “I’m scared, Joel. I was really fucking scared.”

“I know, baby” he coos - softer than you’ve ever heard him. “S’okay. It’s been a scary few days, hm?”

Another great sob cracks through you and you nod as Joel’s large hand moves up over your back to cup your head carefully. He holds you like a babe, like you’re something worth saving, and if he's afraid of the fact that you were bitten, he doesn't show it.

“It’s alright, honey. You’re safe. I’m gonna keep us all safe.”

He rocks back and forth gently with you clasped to his chest.

"It was killin' me, y'know? Not bein' able to hold you. Comfort you.”

"I'm sorry."

"You don't gotta be sorry, sweetheart. Just know that we got you." He smatters more gentle kisses along your hairline. "Me, you, and Ellie. We're a team."

You nod, because you are a team. You have been for months now. You trust them to keep you safe.

“What are we- What ‘re we gonna do, Joel? The bite…”

Joel shushes you easily, shaking his head.

“That’s a problem for tomorrow. We’ll face it when the morning comes.”

You sink into his chest further, nodding.

“Thank you.”

Joel pulls away ever so slightly to look you in the eyes properly.

“Don’t gotta thank me, honey. Don’t ever gotta thank me for anything at all.”

You fall asleep like that; held to his chest like something worth protecting. That night, no nightmares come.

[hauntedwitch04]

Proud of you

Dean Winchester x daughter!Reader

Words: about 1.3k words

Warning: I hate John Winchester and I'm not gonna be sorry about it. Just some sad memories of Dean, but mostly fluff

REQUEST: no requested

Author’s note: Hi! I'M NOT DEAD! I know, shocking!

It was a period full of exams, including the driver's license exam and four college exams, and I could not write anything. And just when I thought I could start writing again, classes started again, so… here I am! I'm actually in the university library and should be studying, but my panic attack said NO, so here you go! this is a short scene I imagined after doing my first drive with my dad a month or so ago, and I liked it too much not to write it down, I hope you enjoy it.

Requests are open I Ask

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Ever since you were little you have dreamed of this moment, yet now that you are here and experiencing it, you can't help but want to run away and run for cover in the calm, quiet safety of your bedroom.

You clutch the steering wheel of the car in your hands, which as much as your father loves her is considered your sister, to look straight ahead.

You feel your father's eyes scrutinizing you, sitting beside you, as he considers whether to tell you something or not. You see out of the corner of your eye Castiel's hand resting on your father's shoulder to restrain him from saying anything, knowing, and feeling the anxiety gripping your stomach at this moment.

You take a deep breath and decide to finally start Baby. You hear the engine roar, and your sweaty hands slide on the steering wheel as you lightly touch the pedals with your feet as your father explained to you just before, and a thousand other times before in motel and diner parking lots when you were bored while Uncle Sam found you a place to eat or sleep.

The car begins to move, and you feel a sense of courage and pride in seeing that you are succeeding for the first time in making the car go.

You slowly manage to move a few meters before misplacing your feet while shifting gears and bringing the car to a stop without warning.

Discouraged you abandon your head against the steering wheel, narrowly missing the horn as your father laughs lightly and rests a hand on your shoulder.

Castiel watches Dean get lost in his own thoughts as he watches you explain with a low stare that you are sorry and that you don't understand how it can take you so long to understand and learn how to drive, knowing full well that your father's mind is actually somewhere else right now.

Dean watching his daughter drive for the first time in the same car in which he had learned, could not help but think of when he had been in that position.

Dean had just turned 15, but on his umpteenth fake ID and driver's license it was marked that he was at least two years older, knowing that no one would dispute the fact, since he had been showing 17 for a year and a half now. He felt sweaty hands against his thighs through his jeans as he felt his father's gaze burn him alive.

"Will you move?" John said with obvious hatred in his voice. He had decided it was time for Dean to learn to drive, so that at night he could sleep and leave his son driving the car, as if he were at least twice as old as he was.

In part Dean knew that John wanted to do this so that he could be more independent of his sons and could also take solo trips without worrying about picking up, or having someone pick them up as had happened several times, Dean and Sam after leaving them alone for a week in a motel in a town they did not know. And the oldest of the Winchester brothers couldn't help but be glad to finally get away from the monster who had become their father.

Dean swallowed laboriously and then started the car. He had almost forgotten about Sam's presence in the car until he encouraged him in a feeble voice, only to receive a cruel look from John.

Slowly he made the car move inside the parking lot. It was now late at night and not a soul would disturb his first drive, or so he thought.

He was starting to pick up speed, imitating the people he drove in the many movies he saw while waiting for his father to return from yet another hunt, when suddenly a car comes speeding towards them.

Panicked Dean suddenly accelerated to escape from the high-speed encounter with that madman, only to brake abruptly shortly after seeing that he was inches from the wall.

Dean quickly turned to see how Sam was doing after all the commotion, but he saw that the fear on his brother's face had given way to a smile, not a complete one since he had recently dropped a tooth and had yet to grow a new one.

"Wow Dean, you were great! It was like being in one of those movies-" His brother was interrupted by John's voice, which like thunder crashed down on those poor creatures who had had the misfortune of being his children.

"Don't bullshit Sam, your brother was an idiot. Do you realize you could have ruined the car!" He said shouting and motioning for his son to get out of the car as he did the same.

"But-but that car was coming at us! I couldn't do anything else! It's only my first time driving!" He tried to excuse Dean as he tried to reason with his father, but nothing could change the man's mind, especially when it came to his favorite sport: mistreating the one person over whom he had full power and control, his own son: Dean.

"And if it were up to me it would be the last damn fool too, how can I count on you if all you do is make mistakes? Disappear from my sight before I decide to leave you in this parking lot, better yet, take the car and go back to the motel, I'll stop at the bar nearby."

Dean could not help but squint his eyes, already thinking about his drunken father arriving from the bar on the crack of dawn, and the beating he would receive from the man because of alcohol, although Dean knew it was not entirely the fault of the liquid that seemed to have become John's fuel since his wife had died.

Dean, in the end, had learned to drive thanks to a teacher who was more patient and kinder than his father: Bobby, who with all the calm and love his father had never shown toward him had managed to teach the oldest of the Winchester brothers to drive in one of the many cars he had in his "backyard." And it was then Dean himself, together with Bobby, who had taught Sam how to ride in the car.

This time, however, it was different: it was not his brother he was teaching to ride in a car, but his daughter, that is, blood of his blood, the result of yet another night of passion with a woman he met at a bar, for whom he could never thank enough whatever deity ruled up there. And be damned, more than he already was, he would never let his little girl suffer what he had suffered.

"Hey, it's okay. Nobody's perfect the first time, and this car is definitely not the best you can have for a first drive, but you did great. I had done much worse my first time, and I'm not kidding, I almost hit a wall." Dean says as he watches his daughter straighten her back and look into his eyes, her own eyes, as he smiles at her, gently, and then pulls her into a hug.

"Really?" The girl asks, as she pulls her father in turn into a tight embrace.

"I swear on Miracle." He replied, as the dog in the back seat barks in response, having heard someone calling him, and the girl can't help but giggle.

They remain embraced for a few minutes, until Dean finally finds the courage to say those words that are so simple and at the same time so important, and so necessary, that he had never heard her father say to her, but that would never deprive his daughter from hearing them from him every day as long as she had breath to breathe. Five words, but they had the power of a thousand.

"I am proud of you."

TAGLIST (updated 19 Nov 2023)

@cheyennep3107 @mortica-raven13 @theviewfromtheotherside @supernatural-lvr @imnotcryingurcrying @cursednevermore @itzdarling @deansbbyx @newtdumbledoorstarksoot @afcnds @sya-skies @evansstan-akya

[kaleldobrev]

Betrayal (2) — Take Me Back Series

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Fem!Reader

Series Summary: After making a deal to bring you back, Sam doesn't see you until years later when your paths cross during a case

Original Prompt: Requested by anonymous | Hi, I just joined Tumblr and came across your blog, it's wonderful! I'd like to make a request, something between Sam and reader. The reader dies and Sam makes a pact to bring her back, but she comes back without remembering him and the hunting life. He thinks it's best to stay away from her. Years later they meet and she falls in love with him all over again, and when they kiss she regains her memory. Do you like it?

Chapter Word Count: 1.6k

Chapter Warnings: Cursing (2x), Sad!Sam

Authors Note: Flashbacks are in italics | If you liked this, don’t forget to like & reblog. I really appreciate it! Feedback is always welcome ♡

Read Chapter One Here | Take Me Back Masterlist

Sam was lying awake just staring up at the ceiling of his and Dean's motel room, simply wondering what you were currently doing this time of night. A few years ago, he would have found you drawing in your journal, but with it being four years later, he was sure that you probably found something else to occupy your time instead. But picturing you still drawing somehow brought him a small sense of comfort.

He sighed, thinking back to one of the last times he had witnessed you drawing -- only a few days before he had made that demon deal in order to bring you back. It was a memory that he often found himself coming back to; a brief moment in time that he had taken for granted; a time he wished he cherished more.

“Ever going to draw me?” Sam asked, turning to his side as he watched you start to draw various assortments of flowers which was one of your favorite subjects to draw.

You grinned at him, holding the pencil in your hand. “Unless you want me butchering your features, I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

“You’re a better artist than I’ll ever be,” he said, resting his hand on your sheet covered leg.

“Give me a few years and maybe I can attempt then,” you smiled, leaning in and giving him a quick peck, a peck that Sam found himself quickly deepening.

"I love you," Sam said, rubbing your cheek with his thumb.

"I love you too," you replied, giving him a small smile.

You were sitting in your armchair in the living room with your sketchbook in your lap; the only source of light in the room was coming from the corner lamp right next to you. For some strange reason, you were currently attempting to draw Agent Sam Campbell, a man that you had just met today. But despite just meeting him today and only having a brief half an hour conversation with him, you felt strangely drawn to him; like there was something familiar about him. The thing that got you the most was when he smiled at you; it was the type of smile that instantly gave you such a sense of peace, like the anxiety you were previously experiencing had just melted away -- no one had ever made you feel that way before. You wished that you could have met Sam under better circumstances, as you probably would have tried and flirted with him. But flirting was the last thing on your mind, as your main priority was finding out who had killed your teens.

Slightly yawning, you got up from the armchair, placing your sketchbook in the side drawer. As you started making your way to your bedroom to try and see if you could get a wink of sleep, your cellphone started vibrating, and you raised a brow; slightly confused as who would be calling you this late at night. Reaching into your pocket, the caller ID read Mel, and you immediately answered the call. You knew that it had to be something serious, as Mel rarely called you this time of night. "Mel, everything okay?" You asked, your voice slightly worried.

“I uh…I need you to come to the center…it’s…it’s an emergency….” Her voice was a slight ramble, trembling.

“What kind of emergency?” You questioned, your brain starting to on high alert.

“The uh…the killer is here…it’s one of our volunteers…” she trailed off again, and slight panic entered you.

“Mel, call the cops or call those FBI guys,” you answered. There were silence on the other end, and then a blood curdling scream. “Mel!” You screamed, and then the line went dead. “Son of a bitch,” you mumbled.

"So, I just did a cross reference of all the volunteers and workers at Y/N's shelter to see if there was anyone present during all five murders. And besides Y/N, there were two other people," Sam said, starting to turn his laptop around for Dean to look at it.

"Mel and Robbie," Dean said, looking at their pictures on Sam's laptop. "Which one are you thinking? Mel or Robbie?"

"Hard to say," Sam admitted. "My instinct is saying Mel only because she was the one that found all the bodies."

"But that doesn't mean necessarily that she's the one that murdered them," Dean continued, and Sam nodded.

"Exactly," Sam agreed. "But, there is something a little weird about Mel."

"Meaning?" Dean asked, passing back Sam his laptop.

"Well, the first two weird things that come to mind is the fact that her name isn't actually Mel, it's Cynthia. And, she's not actually from Kansas City, she's from Malibu," Sam said.

"And what's so weird about that? A lot of people from Kansas City aren't actually from Kansas City. In fact, Y/N isn't even from Kansas City," Dean mentioned.

"Dean, you don't think it's a little suspicious that Mel is actually from Malibu?" Sam asked.

Dean thought about it for a moment before answering. "No, not at all."

"Okay, let me put it this way. Mel moved here from Malibu on March 10, 2019. On March 5, 2019 I made that crossroads deal in order to bring Y/N back," Sam explained.

"March 10th is the same day we came back to Kansas," Dean added.

"Yep," Sam nodded.

"Son of a bitch," Dean mumbled. "You thinkin' what I'm thinking?"

"Mel's the crossroads demon," Sam and Dean said in unison.

"We gotta warn Y/N," Sam said, his voice panicked.

Dean walked over to the motel dresser where he had placed his keys and picked them up in his hands. "I'm hoping you know where she lives Stalker Boy," he said.

Sam looked at his brother about to defend the reasoning for knowing where you had lived, but decided against it, as there was really no time. "Yeah," he said, a little defeated sounding.

You were tied to a chair in the middle of the shelter's gym; all the lights were off and you could barely see anything. The only source of light coming from outside from the moonlight. A second later, you started hearing footsteps from behind you, and your heart started to race just a little bit. Your body jolted a little when two hands were placed on your shoulders. "No need to be nervous Doll," Mel's voice said, but it didn't particularly sound like her natural sounding voice. Her normal voice was a little bit of a higher pitch; this one's was a little deeper.

"I don't know how you don't expect me to be nervous when you have me tied to a chair in the middle of the night," you said, your voice sounding a bit more snarky than you intended it to sound. "How about you untie me and we can talk about whatever is going on with you uh?"

"As much as I love that idea, there's really nothing for us to talk about Sweetcheeks," Mel said, and gave you a quick kiss on the cheek before she grabbed a metal chair and placed it in front of you in order for her to sit down. "I'm just merely stalling for time until the Winchester's arrive to rescue you," she said, the biggest smile on her lips.

"The Winchester's?" You asked, raising a brow. "Who the fuck are the Winchester's?" The only Winchester's you could think of were the gun people. Even then, you weren't completely sure if you had gotten the name right.

"Sam and Dean Winchester," Mel answered. "Your partners in crime. Your found family," she smiled. You still looked at her confused, and she slightly rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be frustrated with you. It's not your fault," she apologized. "You know those cute FBI guys that you talked to earlier Sam and Dean Campbell?" She asked, and you nodded. "They're Sam and Dean Winchester."

"Are they even FBI?" You asked. Your question made Mel laugh, almost making her fall out of her seat.

"Oh now that's funny!" She continued to laugh. "No, no. Not even remotely close," she said. "Both of them have been on the FBI Most Wanted List though," she smiled. "And, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you were on there too at some point."

"I think I would have remembered something like that," you said, your voice a little hesitant.

"Oh! Yes! That's right. You wouldn't have remembered that. Silly me," she giggled to herself. "That's not the only thing you don't remember either."

"What do you mean?" You asked, again, your voice was still hesitant; as you were confused as to what she was even talking about.

"Sammy Campbell, AKA Sammy Winchester," Mel grinned.

"What about him?" You had no idea where she was going with this, but you hated the little teasing she was giving you. She was somehow giving you a lot of information but not enough information at the same time.

"He's the love of your life," she said simply. "Your soulmate. His words."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" You asked her. "I have literally never met Sam before this."

"Aw Sweetheart, but you have. But, it's not really your fault for not remembering, that's what the deal was," she said.

"What deal?" You questioned, the biggest grin formed on her face.

"The deal to bring you back from the dead," she said this so matter of factly. You wanted anything not to believe her, but for some reason, you found yourself believing her words. "In order to bring your pretty self back from the dead, Sammy made a deal with me. And the deal was, I bring you back but you forget everything about hunting in addition to not remembering lover boy."

You looked at her, trying to find a hint of a lie, but you couldn't. She was telling the truth. And you didn't know what you were upset with the most. The fact that you didn't remember that you had died, the fact that there was a whole chunk of your life that was completely missing, or the fact that you didn't remember being in love with Sam.

In the next chapter...

“Sam? Dean?” You called out.

“Yeah it’s us,” Sam replied, walking toward you. “You okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine just…confused,” you confessed, as Sam started to untie your hands from the chair.

“I’m sure. I’m sorry Mel wasn’t who you thought she was,” Sam said, as he finished untying you.

As soon as Sam was done untying you, he moved in front of you in order to stand next to Dean. "That's not entirely it," you said, the two men raised a brow. "Mel...Mel said I knew you guys."

Tag List: @roseblue373 @beansproutmafia @queenie32 @deanwanddamons @missy420-0 @octoberclidan @kidwhofixates @crystal555 @hannahisthebanana @seamlessepiphany @madzzz0797 @livingordeadwhoknows @writinginfear @roskar16 @syrma-sensei @k-slla @justletmereadfanfic @deans-daydream @midorimachisenpaii @rachiem4-blog @fuiabarcelos @foxyjwls007 @sammysnaughtygirl @coldspoons @missscarlettangel @frozenhuntress67 @snakebxtez @crystalandphoebewifey @spnandpj If you'd like to be added to a tag list please follow this link

[mazeinthemiroh]

hiiii id like to request a reaction for ateez members pls. can it be about the reader dating a member but her bias was someone else in the group, idk it seems like such a fun concept if u could please. it could be fluff/ angst whatever u want

and can the hongjoong one be a mingi bias whereas the mingi one is a hongjoong bias (my bias and bias wrecker is showing severely hehe)

everything else can be whatever u want :))

ateez when their s/o's bias is another member

genre: fluff, crack, slight angst?

word count: 1.2k

warnings: cursing, they vary in length tbh so sorry about that

author's notes: oh boy have i been waiting for this request! this is such a fun concept and i really enjoyed writing this so thank you for requesting!! hope you're doing well and hope this is to your liking! let me know what you thought love <33

hongjoong

"and that one rapper? he's so hot! i think he's actually my favourite."

hongjoong was watching one of your old youtube videos; a reaction video to ateez. this is when you first heard about them and wanted to get into their music years ago. who would've thought that life would end up here? you dating one of the members of ateez.

hongjoong giggled at your statement, "awww you loved me from the very beginning" he teased as you read your book on the other side of the room, half embarrassed and half entertained that he was watching that video.

"actually i was talking about mingi," you said cheekily, not even bothering to look up from your book.

all you were met with was silence. too much silence that consequently caused you, after long last, to raise your head and investigate.

and what you saw was a half glare and a big pout on hongjoong's face.

"aww baby don't be sad," you giggled as you went over to him and wrapped your arms around him, "your my favourite now!" you started placing your lips on his neck, trailing then softly in just the right spots, softening him up again.

"and you always will be~

seonghwa

"so." seonghwa's voice sounded from next to you. you were both cuddled up on the couch together, watching an uninteresting sitcom to pass the time. there was something quite dangerous about the smoothness of seonghwa's voice, but you couldn't quite place what.

"when were you gonna tell me yunho was your bias?"

your heart dropped. you quickly glanced at his face to see a unimpressed expression looking back at you.

"h-how did you even-"

"lockscreen."

oh shit. you were fairly new into your relationship with seonghwa, so forgetting to change your lockscreen to something that didn't scream 'i love jeong yunho so much #slay' would've been wise.

"you idiot," seonghwa teased and chuckled lowly, looking back to the tv screen, shaking his head. you pouted and nudged him in response.

"hey! call me an idiot and i'll keep the lockscreen as it is!"

yunho

"well this is awkward."

san said with a massive beaming smile in his face as he continued to go about his day, washes the dishes innocently as if he wasn't the main cause of an argument.

yunho tutted and looked back at you disapprovingly whilst you stuttered and trained to explain yourself.

"she's an admirer, what can i say?" san mused loudly to himself, making yunho gnash his teeth in frustration.

"shut it, you," he hissed at his roommate who merely chuckled in reply. he had never seen yunho jealous before and, to be honest, he found it highly amusing. mostly because yunho looked like a hurt puppy who had lost its way home.

"this doesn't mean anything," you say to your sulky boyfriend, slide your hands of his shoulders, "i love you the most. on the world."

"that's debatable-"

"san!"

"okay, okay..."

yeosang

"jongho is just really cool, okay?"

you sat opposite your boyfriend in a cafe as he took a long slurp of his coffee, not once breaking eye contact with you. he had been interrogating you about this topic for quite some time now, ever since he found out you had a soft spot for jongho.

"cooler than me?" he clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth and twisted the coffee cup in his hands, looking at you with immense interest.

"i never said that," you retorted, "you're just... different!"

"different how?" yeosang pressed on, not giving you a very easy time as he humorously continued to question you.

"well... i just love his voice," you said in a dreamy voice, "like every time i hear him singing i feel i'm ascending into the heavens!"

"well you'd say the same with me if i got more lines!" yeosang threw a used napkin at you and chuckled at his own joke.

san

"what do you mean i'm not your bias?"

your disheartened boyfriend had the biggest, plumpest pout on those lips of his as he looked at your with shiny puppy eyes. this was all news to him and honestly he felt like his whole world fell apart. "i'm dating you am i not??"

"yeah but-" you tailed off innocently, but there was nothing you could say to calm this man's humorously dramatic expression.

"who's your bias then?" he demanded, feigning anger with the twinge of sarcasm in his voice. you knew better to keep your mouth shut.

"if its wooyoung i swear to god, y/n-"

"it's not!"

"..."

"..."

"... you liar!"

he playfully grabbed a pillow and started hitting you with it as you giggled mischievously. you couldn't help but laugh at his childishness. it was no big deal, right?

mingi

you, mingi and hongjoong sat in the living room together in silence. for hongjoong, he just went about his business, laptop on his lap as he typed away doing some sort of work. but you and mingi were avoiding eye contact, avoiding talking. avoiding literally everything except breathing.

it was only a matter of time before hongjoong caught onto this. and as he looked from you, to mingi, and then back to you again, he knew there was soemthing wrong.

"what's up with you guys?" he asked suspiciously, lowering his laptop screen slightly.

"nothing, nothin-"

"y/n loves you more than me."

"wha- mingi!" you lightly slapped his arm defensively, "mingi is mad that you're my bias. that's all. nothing deep." your voice was high and strained as mingi crossed his arms Iver his chest.

"wait," hongjoong started grinning proudly, "... i'm your bias?"

by this time mingi was fuming and glaring daggers into hongjoong, striking fear into the leader.

"ehem that's not important," hongjoong coughed nervously, "that doesn't mean anything!"

"exactly!" you chimed in, "see mingi?"

you nudged him gently now, but the gaze he gave you in return did not look so convincing.

wooyoung

"i get it, he's more handsome than me."

this made you laugh. not because it was true or you were making fun of your boyfriend, but more with how you couldn't tell if he was being serious or not.

but after the minutes went by and the unusual coldness and silence from wooyoung continued, you realised that he was actually upset about this.

"oh woo, don't be like that," you leaned over to grab his hand, "you're not being serious are you?"

"well you like my best friend more than me. why wouldn't i be upset about this?" he lucked his dry lips and cleared his throat, his eyebrows furrowed.

"because you're my number one," you leaned over to give him a kiss on the cheek. and then another. and then another. so many sloppy kisses had been peppered all over his face by the time he started giggling and smiling again. you had won him over!

jongho

"seonghwa looks like such an angel," you stared with sparkly eyes at the screen in front of you as you watched the new ateez music video for their latest comeback.

jongho couldn't help but notice that your attention was mostly fixated on seonghwa in the video. you complimented his handsomeness, his voice, the lines he had, the way he fit the concept perfectly. he couldn't help but feel a little annoyed.

"yeah seonghwa looks great," he muttered and cleared his throat, watching the music video with you.

"you look handsome too," you quickly added, realising you hadnt said anything about your actual boyfriend because eoyu were too busy gawking over your bias.

"oh no its too late for that now!" jongho said playfully and poked your side, causing you to let out a half yelp, half laugh.

"i'm sorry baby, i just got... distracted?"

[the-lonelyshepherd]

fifteen questions for fifteen friends :) tagged by @staghunters tyty

Are you named after anyone?

nope. actually my name got changed like right before i was born bc it was too similar to another relatives 😭

When was the last time you cried?

sometime like.. a week and a half ago

Do you have kids?

no im like 12.9 years old.

What sports do you play/have played?

hmmm i’ve done swim i also skated for a bit but stopped. planning to start skating again :)

Do you use sarcasm?

sometimes but i’m not great at it imo

What's the first thing you notice about a person?

Also gonna say vibes. if we want smtn different id say shoes. i think i can tell a lot abt someone by their shoes

What's your eye color?

grey blue green yayy

Scary movies or happy endings?

honestly depends on the mood but i just want like. a satisfying ending. wether that be happy or sad

Where were you born?

wouldn’t you like to know

Any talents?

i play music i draw and i know a concerning amount of things about fish

Do you have any pets?

yes… one dog one cuban tree frog and the current aquarium count is 1 betta fish, 7 white cloud mountain minnows, 5 golden white cloud mountain minnows, ~15 red neocaridina shrimp and an unknown amount of pest snails and other various aquatic crawly things. gonna get a lot more fish soon tho once i stock the big tank :)

How tall are you?

uhh a little above average for my age. taller than prev by quite a bit lol. 

Favorite subject at school?

i like art ofc but like. big on biology and also really liked human geography. also very much an ela kid.

Dream job?

oooogh this is hard i feel like there’s a lot of very different things i could have fun with. something in biology/ecology with lots of field work and travel could be cool i love going places and seeing animals and learning about them. but the main one would maybe be like… a really good filmmaker or showrunner. like that people really like and appreciate my work. i just like to tell stories :)

okay i’m going to. man up and actually tag people. if i don’t tag you it’s nothing personal 🙏🙏 i am stupid

@jackienatist @antlerslayer @frog4278 @imsososolesbian @blackbloodedisabel @chrometheraptor @avianreptiles @lynxfrost13 @rippedpatches @mamadore @fleshdyke @starstaiined @suprecorp @garf-lover96 @longlost-soul

[hetalia-club]

Giving you this bc ur like, the only hetalia blog i still follow that still posts. But like.

Okay back in 2018-2019(?) i had a pretty big hetalia phase, i watched hetafacts videos n every episode that was on YouTube, i listened to the music on repeat. It was a major hyperfixation before i knew that i was autistic.

For the longest time after i stopped, engaging with hetalia for some reason i would. Cringe really hard whenever i saw anything hetalia related. Like. On ao3 when you go to search things it tells you how to search things and one i got (and keep getting) is like "hetalia tag:f/f" or something idk how proper ao3 searches work. Id like screenshot it and go to my friends n say "it haunts me" or some shit.

But like recently ive been. Embracing that part of my past? I guess? Like. Almost like coming to terms with it? Idk i started having a less bad reaction n like, realized it probably one of the more normal fandoms i was in. I was, cringe, as all kids are, but i was. Happy.

And then like. At a sleepover a few weeks ago, one thing leads to another and im telling my friend abt the songs and how ich leibe is. Just a recipe, and how i used to listen to almost all of the songs. I show them the clip of France trying to get England to sign a marriage contract, America ordering fucking condoms from Russia.

It has been at least 2 weeks since, and i can feel the hyperfixation coming back, half the music ive been listening too again is hetalia character songs (theyre so fucking good???) and ive been getting. Urges to watch the show and. I dont know how to feel or what to do?? Like. I'm afraid almost to get back into hetalia? Like i watched black butler a while ago, and i realized how. Theres some weird fucking tension between ceil n sebastian n i think im afraid im going to have that same reaction to hetalia?

Cause like there is shit i just completely forgot about. Like. The Bad Touch Trio. And im scared man.

Im sorry to fuckin, give you all of this, but i just. I dont know what to do ig. None of my friends like or used to like hetalia, the one i do info dump hetalia stuff too does not like hetalia and is learning shit about it against their will.

Idk, should i watch the show again? Is it, good? I genuinely can't remember anymore.

Sorry for using ur ask box like a confessional

I mean I’m right there with you man. The sole reason I am still in the Hetalia fandom is because hetalia got me through some real dark chapters and events in my life. I discovered Hetalia years ago in Highschool while with a very abusive ex who had to know everything I was doing at any given time. He wouldn’t let me go anywhere without him there. I tried to break up with him but he actually wouldn’t let me. He would threaten to off himself if I did so I felt bad because his mom was an alcoholic and his houses burned down. I stopped really going anywhere at all because if I did he would come with me and he ruined my relationships with most of my friends just by being ‘the worst’. I stopped cheerleading, I got depression really bad, I started to do terrible in all my classes but I discovered Hetalia while on deviant art and was instantly intrigued. It was like “idk what this is but I will now make it my personality”

Years later while with my most recent abusive Ex that I just broke up with last November I got back into Hetalia when our relationship started to get really bad and hard to cope wit on my own. I needed an escape and something to help me avoid him and no care so much about his insults something that I could think about instead of being sad all the time. Hetalia is something that just brings me joy. Instead of venting to people, getting therapy or increasing my meds Hetalia was just always there to go back to and escape. No idea what it is about it. Won’t go into details about the relationship, it’s irrelevant right now but I’m sure you can guess.

To answer your question, no Hetalia isn’t ‘good’ it makes zero sense and is confusing as hell. But for me it’s fun to use as a spring board for basically any kind of AU I could think up. The characters can fit into any type of situation you want to shove them in.

I would say give it a rewatch, as much as you want anyway. What is the worst that could happen? You continue an interest that brought you joy? Worst case. You are a bit cringe? Who cares if you are cringe if you are happy? Also not encouraging you to live a double life but if you are embarrassed to like Hetalia you don’t actually have to tell anyone how obsessed with it you are. No one but my ex knows how much I like Hetalia and he really has no idea just how deep I am in this shit. But if people knowing about one of your interests humiliates you then just don’t share it. At the end of the day it’s your comfort and it makes you happy it’s no one’s business.

There are a lot of old fandom tropes that have disappears the BTT being one of them. They put them as a group still but I guess they call it ‘bad friends ti’ now. There are still some things that make me side eye. But that’s every fandom I feel. You can choose who you wish to associate with and who you want to block or avoid. It’s your blog you don’t own an explanation to anyone.

Personally I don’t interact much with the people of the fandom itself I got a few people it talk to every now and again but really i just do my own thing. I write my own fics for myself. I got my little tumblr, discord and TikTok, I post about my little AUs and dumb thoughts and continue on. If people want to follow me that’s great, welcome. If they don’t that’s cool to!

Thanks for sticking around with me even after your Interest in Hetalia fizzled out tho haha! That had to be difficult I am very annoying at times I’m sure 😭.

Again worst thing that could happen than if you are a bit cringe. But not being cringe is boring as hell. Irl I’m one of the most normal bitches you could find. Carbon copy white girl. Absolutely no one would guess I were a Hetalia obsessed loser irl. In a line up you could not pick me out and guess my interests. So in February I got my hair done right? I got like. 500 dollar biolage it fades from brown to strawberry blonde. Want to know the reason I got this hair style? Because of Italy that’s why. I wanted red hair like him. Did I tell anyone that? No. When people said they liked my hair and asked me why I went red I would just go “idk just felt like it” but I would be thinking about him knowing the real answer.

Good luck anon, if you stick around welcome back the water is fine. If you don’t can you toss me that life vest up there if you don’t mind? Thank you!

[godfrey-the-chaos-duck]

this just in: Irish loser is Sad™ because all my friends can go and do shit but not me apparently

Vent under the cut, I'm really sorry about this but I have to get it off my chest (it's nothing too serious but it is kinda long)

I'm eighteen. I've voted twice. I've finished secondary school. People my age are planning holidays and going to college and moving out and actually living life, and I feel like I'm falling behind so so much.

I don't have a bank account. I don't have a passport or any form of photo ID with a date of birth. I don't even have (or want!) a driver's licence, I will circle back to that later though.

My parents (particularly my mom) keep saying they'll help me get set up with all the above but because Mom's busy with work and Dad's really forgetful, it never gets done.

It's gotten to a point where I don't actually see a point in getting these things set up, for the following reasons:

I haven't had my name legally changed yet so everything would be set up under my deadname. Which. Fuck that.

For a bank account to make sense I would need money and I live in literally the textbook definition of "rural ass farming town" so the only jobs around that don't need experience are working in the supermarket or food service. I would, and I'm not exaggerating here, rather launch myself into a black hole than do those jobs because I've heard from my neurotypical peers how hard they are so I can only imagine how awful it would be for someone with autism like myself. My only other option is to try and get unemployment benefits but like. What would I even be spending the money on? Certainly not a house (the housing market in Ireland is literally impossible) and not a holiday either.

For a passport to make sense I would need to be able to travel, and quite aside from the No Money thing (see above) I've been fucked over by fate yet again because Mom doesn't trust me to go places on my own. She's only quite recently started letting me take the bus to a town half an hour away with friends. I don't even see the use in asking her to go on a train/plane/ferry unaccompanied because I know for a fact she'd say no. She'd say something along the lines of "we should do this together a few times first" which, understandable, but then she's so tired from work and busy with housework on the weekends that that never ends up coming to fruition. Add to that my crippling anxiety, catastrophic thinking and fear of the unknown, and I have basically conditioned myself into thinking I can never go anywhere more than a half hour's drive away without a parent.

I do not want to learn to drive. My dad keeps telling me I should because it would give me freedom, except no it wouldn't. It's not like I could use his car because he needs to go places too, and I could probably never afford my own car cause that shit is expensive as hell to run and maintain, so I really see no sense in learning. Also, I have the navigational skills of a teaspoon, so I would be basically guaranteed to get lost.

All of this has come to a point where I'm super hesitant to ask for anything because I know that either my parents will outright say no, or I'll end up chickening out because they'll remind me there's probably something I haven't thought of. (Mind, they don't often fully explain what)

And this was fine a few years ago when I had no friends and couldn't see how people actually lived their lives, but as my friends are all telling me about things they plan to do, I guess I'm having a lot of realisations.

The first time a classmate of mine said she was going on a holiday independently with some friends of hers, my first immediate thought was, "Do her parents just not care?" This would've been a little over two years ago, when I and all my class were around 16.

Now, though, I'm realising that teens going places on their own is actually NORMAL and that, big surprise, I'm once again the weird one. I told Mom about this and her response was "there's no right speed to do life at" which is right, you shouldn't do things if you don't feel ready to do them, but I don't know, something about this whole situation feels kinda wrong to me.

Here's the thing that's made me emotional today though.

The big Pride festival in Ireland is on June 29th. I wanted to go last year with my friends but Mom said no because it would be "too crowded" and "what if something goes wrong and I can't be there for you" and all that. And the worst part? She's right. It would have been very overwhelming.

Anyway this year, my friends aren't going, so even if by some miracle Mom's answer was going to change, I would feel awkward not being able to go with anyone I knew. So I'm not even gonna ask.

The way I see it, I can't move on with my life in any way as it stands. I can't release music, or publish books, or sign up to act in anything, until I get my name changed, because I do not want to be renowned under my deadname.

But I also feel like I can't change my name until I move out. My parents say they need to know where I am all the time, to the point where I once had an outing with a group of friends interrupted by a call from my father because I had left with the group from the coffee shop he'd dropped me off at, to a different shop somewhere else, two minutes' walk away.

I don't know. I feel like I have no freedom or independence and I'm genuinely unsure whether this is normal for people my age, or if it's an autism thing, or if my parents (again, particularly my mother) are being weird.

Basically what I'm wondering is

Is it healthy to be in this situation? And if not, how can I get out of it?

Again, I'm really really sorry about this, I know I don't usually get all personal on here but just. I feel weird about this and need some advice or at the very least a virtual shoulder to cry on

[beyondxmeasure]

Which plant is your favorite favorite? I'm guessing you have a green thumb but is there any plant you have not been able to successfully care for that you which you could? Are you plants indoor or outdoors.

I have a mix of both indoor and outdoor. Currently everything that I can bring in is inside though because of the cold. I'm kinda sad my fruit trees haven't given me any fruit yet. But my neighbors share their figs and oranges. I have a eucalyptus plant that went kinds crazy this year.

Asking me which plant is my favorite is like making me choose between my children. So I’ll choose my top four…

My spider plant…

She’s one of my newest. And yeah, she’s a basic bitch but I love her. So many plant bloggers say they’re overrated or can be a pain to care for. Like they dry out or leaves get brown super easily. But she’s been nothing but perfect and so low-maintenance since I got her. Look at how beautiful…

🌿🌿🌿🌿

(One of my Micans babies)

I have a philodendron Micans which I absolutely adore. My oldest girl, Ive had her for nearly two years now. The velvety green leaves, how easy she grows. I’m growing three new baby plants from loads of propagations Ive collected over time. But she got cranky after being moved to a hanger in my bedroom, so we’re having a bit of a rehab moment. I’ve relocated her back to the window she used to be in and crossing my fingers that she will bounce back.

🌿🌿🌿🌿

I also love this new gal I just picked up a few weeks ago. She’s a fussy gal though, so it’s taking me some time to get her adjusted. She started out with loads of long luscious tendrils, but once I got her home everything started dying. So, another touch and go situation… but after giving her an extreme makeover (ie pruned the shit out of her and got a million new propagations) she’s on the mend.

🌿🌿🌿🌿

(My wee Birkin babes)

My Birkin bestie! When I started my plant collection, she was one of the plants in my first purchase. We had some rough times and I nearly lost her. Had to send her off to my mom’s for rehab. After a few months of new scenery she was back to her thriving self. She’s doing so well that last week I was able to propagate… I divided her into three and now I have two bouncing baby Birkins. I’m already seeing new growth.

🌿🌿🌿🌿

I think calling my thumb green would be a little too generous, but maybe I just don’t want to jinx it. Haha!

Although Ive had pretty decent luck overall with my plants, I have definitely suffered some losses. I tend to acquire in spurts. I have a running wish list and will buy several at a time. My first purchase two summers ago started with one plant, then I went to Home Depot for supplies and came home with 16 more. Over the course of the next few months I lost all but four…

Since then a small handful of others have come and gone.

Unfortunately my environment isn’t the most hospitable. I live in a small condo without a lot of windows. So I have a large plant stand fitted with grow lights and the rest go in my bay window in my bedroom. In the summer time I have huge flower planters and window boxes for my balcony and I relocate about half of my plants outside for the season. But I live in New England so I can’t have anything outside year round.

🌿🌿🌿🌿

I’m jealous, Nonny! Id love to be able to have fruit trees or any trees or plants outside. Figs sound amazing! You’re lucky. I had a pretty big vegetable garden that I maintained at the restaurant I used to be a chef. I really wish I had space to grow veggies or herbs again.

Id love to know where you are that you have fig and orange trees year round. Do you put the fresh eucalyptus in your shower?

[massive-nerd-potential]

Ranking New Who Doctors by how funny they were on regeneration energy

I tried just going for the Doctor, not for any plot but sometimes it was hard to separate haha. I do think I kept the intertwining. At a minimum though! Drumroll please……

As for NUMBER 1: The man. The icon. The TENTH Doctor.

Counting the children in needs episode I think he‘s the one who gets the most silly regeneration time (also since there is practically no time jump between regenerating and the story whereas for the others, at least SOME time has passes or is skipped pretty soon afterwards

The episode that made me go "wow I actually wanna write down this quote now because it‘s so cool“

Wake up, be badass

Be woken up by the TEA? How British do you want to be??

Just let the poor man breathe for a second Jackie, good lord

Getting up earlier than he should to help Rose and her family after the attack is so heartwarming

And also irresponsible. You are an irresponsible man. You are in NO shape to steer anything, let alone a space- and timeship

NUMBER 2: the positivity after the angst that was 12~ the THIRTEENTH Doctor!

Doesn‘t know what a tongue is, apparently (she has never NOT had one)

….let‘s work on your perception of 19 seconds, huh?

Literally creates a full ass Sonic screwdriver with a bunch of spoons and a can do attitude

"Half an hour ago, I was a white haired Scotsman“

At this point I feel like crashing after regenerating has become custom

Literally forgets the name that makes up everything she holds herself to be

NUMBER 3: my man! The Doctor ever. The TWELTH Doctor!

More serious than the ones before

Takes getting used to since he is QUITE a different Doctor compared to 11

Grumpy old man tm

Just go to bed buddy, it‘s okay

Oh no the eyebrows have declared independence!

How dare Strax and Clara not wear labels, EVERYONE would confuse them like that

Really manages to find that sweet spot between being silly and high on regeneration energy while also already showing the character of the Doctor to come

DINOSAUR!

….sad Dinosaur. Make sad Doctor

NUMBER 4: The long awaited. The facial anomaly. The FOURTEENTH Doctor!

We don‘t see much of it :(

Absolutely no one can go "What? waHAT? WHAT?“ like David Tennant

No don‘t give the Dalek man ide- STOP IT

Reference to 13! "60 minutes ago I was this really brilliant woman“

Why the hell do you just have a plunger lying around?

13 was the first one sensible enough to maybe… NOT wreak her ship with her regeneration and do it safely outside on land. And what do you do? GET IN IT AND CRASH IT! Men and their vehicles, I swear…/j

NUMBER 5: probably the most underrated Doctor of them all. The NINTH Doctor!

Mostly wasn‘t seen at all

He‘s implied to have been travelling for a bit before, just didn‘t happen to have the time to check himself in a mirror

Literally all we get is "look at the ears…“

He gets extra points for going first so they couldn’t do much

Also I love him and he‘s silly enough anyways

If you want to, you can pretend all of Rose is just him running on a high of regeneration energy

He‘d blow up a house even without though

And finally, NUMBER 6, last but not least (though im this specific case… last and least): the ELEVENTH Doctor!

Fuck you doing making a literal child COOK for you, a several hundred year old guy, IN THE MIDDLE OD THE NIGHT

Stop spitting your shit everywhere it‘s disgusting and rude, who the hell do you think has to clean that up? Cause I know you won’t!

The ole crash again

Feels like more like a sitcom bit than a sci-fi Doctor Who scene, probably due to Moffats writing background

What is your obsession with food??

An apple a day keeps the Doctor away.. truly truly

You are really really bad at landing your ship in the right time…. But we know that much already

[recoverychronicles]

Post;

I don’t know if anybody will end up reading any of what i write, if anybody will care about what i write, i guess the only things that matters is how i feel about typing all this out.

If you’re someone that is going through what i did, you’ve recently survived/recovered/got out, i hope you connect with something I’m saying, and maybe you feel less alone. I wish that along my own journey i had someone that cared or i connected to. I felt alone, and everyone that knew about my abuse aided him in gaslighting me, in my eyes that makes them almost as bad as him.

Id say, now 2 years on and sober, I’m doing okay.

2 years sober. Of a slowly inclining addiction. I actually beat it, i came out stronger, i came out the winner.

I don’t have the temptation of using, I don’t have the urge to “just once” have a hit. I get scared taking Panadol for fucks sake. My Endo surgery was a real test to my pain killer addiction, but i came out of that without a bump. I even went to a music festival with them, and yeah I had the thought that i could take some codeine, but I didn’t, i had no need for it. I was too amped up on caffeine.

I don’t have the temptation to smoke weed anymore, I can’t even stand the smell of it anymore.

Sometimes, i wanna do a cap at a concert or a music festival, purely just for the vibes. To be able to experience that in the state of mind MD gives you. However, i can go to kick ons at someone’s house, and rack up lines for others and not even have the temptation to ask for a line, to ask for a bump. I just don’t care for it in that way anymore.

Cocaine. My worst enemy. It’s the one thing I wouldn’t be able to say no to. Every death that has happened to the family in the past year, every terminal illness someone has been diagnosed with, all I’ve wanted to do is buy a bag and get high. All I’ve wanted to do is cope in the best way i know how, with drugs. I know that my god mother would be disappointed in herself, my grandma would be disappointed in in herself, my god father would be disappointed in himself, if i were to react to what happened to them in that way.

I get sad sometimes thinking that i ruined casual drug usage for myself by getting addicted, but some people aren’t built to take it easy on drugs, addiction is an illness, and there isn’t a cure for it. I know that drugs weren’t good for my mental health, hence why i begged him to stop doing them with me, but he wasn’t ready to accept we were both toxic on them and during the come down.

I have officially broken up with drugs.

I have my days where the sexual abuse still gets to me. I think on the other end of the spectrum, i have begun to over sexualise myself, because i was seen as an object for so long, that all i can see myself as. I don’t understand why someone would like me for reasons outside of a sexual nature, that’s something i still have to work on. People prove it to me everyday that that’s not all they are after when maintaining a friendship with me, but the sickness in the back of my mind wont let it go.

I still jump at loud noises, i still snap when something is triggering, i still get shaken up when something reminds me of that time in my life.

I feel i am at a comfortable stage in my healing that this is the right outlet for me. I have done a lot of work and healing to get to where i am today. 2 and a half years ago I wasn’t allowed to work, and now i maintain 2 jobs, where the people like me. I celebrated 2 years sober in August, with the evanescence concert in my state. I have amazing friends who look after me, and cherish me for who i am. They acknowledge that i am sober, and look after me in that regard, they respect me as woman and as a survivor.

It does get better, even if it doesn’t feel like it in the stage that you are in. I promise.

[llitchilitchi]

Im so incredibly disappointed and demotivated at this point

i know we all keep shitting and making fun of twitter but its the site that actually has most of my following and tumblr isnt exactly the best site to go to if you wanna get somewhere as an artist

my interactions absolutely plummeted. i used to get over 600 likes overnight when my following was half the size its now and now i struggle to get to 400. no matter what time i post the likes, retweets and especially comments are super low and idk if the algorithm entirely changed or if people just left or dont care anymore but its disheartening. i spent ages building it up and it disappeared pretty much overnight

i mean yeah, Im not doing all that great on tumblr either so it could be just the time of the year, i barely gain followers and i see mostly the same people in my notes, and while i really appreciate it id love to grow. as much as quality over quantitiy applies its still just... sad to see that there is no one else thatd care? idk how to phrase it properly.

Im not gonna stop posting but it feels like maybe I should. because no matter what I do anymore my art does bad. my follower count is stagnant. the response to my art is minimal. half a year ago i felt like i could maybe turn it into something that i do to financially support myself but that seems nigh impossible now and there is no other website that would be good for artists

[quietplace26]

A Ghost Doctor au where Seung-tak is still a doctor, but he's from our world and Ghost Doctor is his favorite show~

Seung-tak wasn't having a good day.

One momenthe was working his new dream job as a doctor, the next he's fired and kicked out the medical field permantely!

And it wasn't even his fault! He was framed!

Someone, probably one of the rich bastards who thought they ruled the hosiptal, made up something about Seung-tak, and given the fact he came frm a poorer background, the higher ups didn't hestiate to fire him!

Seung-tak felt like crying. What was he going to do now...

With shaky hands, he grabs his tv remote and switches the tv on, flipping through the channel till he got to the show he wanted to see.

To his relief, it was on!

'Ghost Doctor' Seung-tak's comfort show.

It was about an arrogant but handsome doctor who becomes a ghost and goes through many challenges to return back to the living! These challenges changes Cha Young-min, the doctor, into a better person and an a even better doctor! He even gets his dream girl in the end!

Seung-tak wished he could've been half the doctor Cha Young-min was...

With a sad sigh, Seung-tak curls up on his ratty couch and falls asleep.

He never notices the golden dust that came out his tv. It envelops the sleeping Seung tak and makes him disappear.

Seung tak wakes up the next day feeling strange. He was on a bed that was definitely not his but for some odd reason, it felt familar.

The room he was in felt the same! The room wasn't his but felt familar!

Slowly he explored the place he was in. It was fancy! Too fancy for the likes of Seung-tak to ever dream of having! So why then did everything feel so familar?

A phone rings, and the caller id says mom on it.

Seung-tak's parents have been dead for years.

The woman, his... mother, was reminding him not to be late for his new job at the hospital.

The hospital she mention was the same one Cha Young-min works in on 'Ghost Doctor'.

But what caught Seung-tak's attention the most was the fact she called Seung-tak... Seung-tak.

Being a true fanboy of the show he knew that there was a background character that shared his name, but he never did anything for the plot.

Seung-tak drops his phone as he finally realizes where he truly was.

Somehow, he was in 'Ghost Doctor'! And he's taken the Seung-tak of this world's place!

One intense fanboy session later, he gets ready to go to work. This made him giddy, as he technically got his dream job back!

Oh! And this meant he could see or meet the real Cha Young-min!

After looking up some directions, Seung-tak happily makes his way over to the hospital where 'Ghost Doctor' was set in.

He was prime and ready for a wonderful first day on the job!

It was only when he was walking up to the building that he had a thought.

Where exacty was he in the plot? Was this before or after Young-min got into his accident?

He gets his answer when someone brushes past him, heading straight for the hospital as well.

It was Cha Young-min, alive and still in his body!

This was the begining of the show!

Seung tak whips his head around to see a car speeding down the road... and heading straight for Young-min!

Seung-tak knew he could just ignore it. Let the plot happen like it did on the show, but...

Seung-tak drops his things and runs toward Young-min.

This was real life right now! He couldn't just stand there and do nothing while Young min gets hit by a freaking car!

Young-min turns to Seung-tak, having heard his panicked shouts, a look of disgust was on his face as Seung-tak rushes up to him and slams into the other man.

Seung-tak felt his knees scrape on the gravel as both he and Young-min went tumbling to the ground.

When they finally stopped rooling, Young-min grabs Seung-tak's shirt, snarling out, "What the hell-!" He gets cut off by the car whizzing by them at break neck speeds and slams into a pole.

The same pole Young-min was standing next to mere seconds ago.

The older doctor slowly lets Seung tak go. A look of shock was on his features as he stared at the flaming wreckage.

"You-you saved me..." Young-min sounded shaken and rightfully so!

Seung-tak gives him a weak smile, asking the other doctor if he was alright.

The older doctor opens his mouth to answer but lets out a cry when he sees Seung-taks blood covered knees.

Young-min shoots up to his feet, and with surprising strength, plucks Seung-tak off the ground and hauls him into the hospital.

Later on as Seung-tak had his knees checked out and bandaged up, he glances out a nearby window and sees how a large crowd of people have gathered around the still buring wreckage.

The young doctor sighs tiredly, knowing he changed the show's plot for good now.

The big question now was it a good or a bad change?

But as Seung-tak witnesses a rather adorably flustered Cha Young-min walk into his room with a cup of coffee and some sweets, he felt he made the right choice.

[naomixhill]

10 October 2014

Written 8 years ago...

It’s my birthday, but it never feels like my birthday anymore.

There is something intrinsically saddening about driving alone down High Street in the dead of night. I thought this to myself as I pulled into Monte Carlo while trying to avoid the waves of people running around in the city lights; some would go to bars and then onto a stranger’s bed, citing their sin on their inhibitions; others would go out to a night of fine dining, go home to read a book, maybe catch up on the news. I, however, was on a mission. C and I had just gotten off the phone, and I was to bring over a glass of red wine and bold cigars. 

When I walked into the cigar shop, I was greeted by two foreign men, one Syrian by birth and the other Middle Eastern. The Middle Easterner quickly came to my aid as I began peering through the selection. “It’s not everyday we see someone like you in here, miss. Is there something I can help you with?” He asked with a boyish, excited tone. I lowered my voice, and asked for Henry Clays. Not surprisingly, they ran out earlier in the day. My luck has always been blessedly good. 

I prowled around the aisles, until the Middle Easterner motioned for me to follow him to the back. Once there, he handpicked two cigars (both $36 each), and handed them to me. “I think you will like these,” he smiled. I took them, asked him to find me a good corresponding wine, and met him at the cash register. He threw in another cigar for free after looking at my ID, which told him today was my birthday. 

After retrieving the goods, I quickly ran out to my car, trying to avoid the terrible rain, and drove to C’s. He had parked in such a way that it allowed my car, and my car only, to fit in a parallel spot directly outside of his house. As I pulled up, he was dutifully sitting outside on the porch smoking  a cigarette. He looked sad. He has looked sad for a while now. 

C and I made small talk, and then called out his roommate to join us. The three of us smoked cigars; I drank wine and the two boys drank dark, dry beer. It became increasingly evident that C had been drinking all day, the more we all talked. The two of them were engaged in discussion regarding the upcoming case competition at Michigan, but every once in a while there were casual slip-ups, and inappropriate questions and comments made in my direction: clear indicators that they weren’t just drunk, but really drunk.

By 1 a.m., C and I were grinding up against one another in his bed. “It’s your birthday, so you know I’m going to need to give you the best sex of your life, lady,” he told me. I was on top, then he was on top, then we were going at it from the side and every position in between; but he was sloppily drunk, and I was still too sober and hurt from another disappointing celebration. 

Still later in the evening, C’s second roommate arrived home with a good looking friend. He was a blonde, very tall, computer science major from Purdue University. “Only in town for the weekend, just trying to ease my mind before our second round of midterms,” he told me. It wasn’t too long after soft introductions that C’s roommate asked if I would like to participate in a threesome with some Pi Phi sorority girl. “Come on, have  a little fun, birthday girl,” was a reoccurring statement throughout the evening. 

Eventually, the second roommate convinced C - who was nearly falling asleep - and myself to go to the bars with him and his friend. So at a very late 2 a.m., there we were. I was getting drunker, C was blacked out, and the other two were hitting on beautiful women all around. At the top of the staircase of Ethyl, I saw M from the investment club. I tugged on C’s cuff, and screamed for him to text M to meet us. He obliged, and within just a few minutes, M came down to visit.

C told M to keep an eye on me, and that he would be back in no time at all. A half hour may have gone by before he returned, but the entire time M and i spent in conversation. He told me more about Jordan, about weapons trading, about all of the things he did that I so desired to know about. He was in the process of plugging my number into his phone as C arrived, and with that, C sharply said, “M, what the fuck are you doing, man?” which caused M to very sharply put away his phone in shame. M has always been subservient to C, and may love him more than anyone in the world. Nonetheless, my attraction toward M is strong, borderline inappropriate, and it was the happiest portion of my night. 

C at this point was no longer himself. “Guys, let’s go smoke a fucking cigarette, I need some air,” he told us. So we all went out to the balcony of Ethyl and smoked. It was there that C told us the news. It suddenly made sense why his sadness had been so pervasive, why his smoking had gotten so heavy and his words had become sharper than usual. 

"My mother has stage three cancer. She didn’t tell any of us that it came back. She is going to die in two month’s time at the best, the doctor thinks sooner." 

Drunk and confused, I began to cry for him, and ask, “why didn’t you tell me this? I would have been there for you.” M, meanwhile, tried to comfort C, telling him, “Look man, she is going to fight this out. They told my father he was due to die weeks ago, but he’s still kicking it, he is still fighting. Don’t doubt her, C. She will hang in there for you.” 

C raised his voice, and didn’t hear a word of M. “I even bought my parents a fucking house to retire in, out in North Carolina. She is going to fucking die before it’s even ready. She’s going to fucking die.” 

I started to feel faint at this, and began wobbling. An incredibly strong urge to throw up became apparent, and C could see the familiar look all over my face. “Look K,” he said, “I’m going to call you a taxi. I see some of my friends at the back of the bar anyway. I’ll be home soon, okay?” He pointed at M to keep an eye on me, again. He did. 

When C stormed off, M grabbed my face and pulled it closely to his own. “K, you are so sad.” I shook my head and said it was nothing compared to what C must be feeling, but he contradicted me. “No K, it’s something else. You are always a sad girl, and I don’t think anyone really notices. But just know you are incredibly sexy, obviously intelligent, and you don’t need to take shit from anyone, not even C.” He smiled and pressed his nose up against my cheek. My hormones went completely out of control, and I almost considered kissing him. Thank God, senses prevailed. 

The taxi came within minutes.  It brought me back to C’s house, and with his keys, I unlocked the door. I undressed myself and waited in his bed. I tried to sober up from everything that had just happened, but simply couldn’t. I cried until I could no longer produce tears. And then I waited. And waited. But C never showed. 

Perhaps at 4 a.m. I awoke to C coming home from the bars. He sat down at his computer and began working on his stock pitch for the case competition. Even if drunk, it was all he could think about; anything to clear his mind from the painful realities of the present. I tiptoed up behind him, and hugged him from behind. I came around to his chair, still undressed from earlier, and straddled him. I tried to kiss him, but was softly rejected. So I then kissed his cheek, his forehead, and down to his shirt buttons. I had decided now was the time to tell him I loved him, that I would be there for him through all of this, that we could take off time from school to go see his mother or do whatever it was he needed to do. But rather, as my knees began to inch toward the floor, and my mouth began to progress towards, he stopped me. He pushed me up, and told me to go to sleep. 

I protested, and he told me more firmly. “Go to fucking sleep, K, it’s late and I don’t want to do this right now.” I began to straddle him once again, but he knocked me off. “Just go to bed.” 

I slid onto the floor from the force of his push, and trying to get up, I stumbled down the stairs. He didn’t turn around. At the bottom of the staircase, I assessed my bleeding knee cap and banged up arms. C came to the edge of the top of the staircase realizing what happened and apologized, saying “I”m sorry this is all my fault, I didn’t mean to-“ 

But I was already gone before I could hear a full response.

I jumped into my Ford Focus, still too drunk to drive, far too sad, and drove home. Happy 21st birthday to me.

[thisisegregiouuuus]

bro 😻

its actually so insane how i used to be so obsessed w the shining. like looking back on all that i was litereally going crazy--and like my interests/phases only last like a week or so but damn that one alsted like 2 months or smth, i thought it would never end so i was kinda surprise when i watched it for like the 5th time or something and i went 'damn...this is getting kinda old'

i genuinely felt sad tho. it always feels kinda sad falling out of a phase/interest kinda thing, especially one youve liked for a while. like with the shining its fine bc i know i still like it but it was just a crazy 2 month-phase, now i still like it but like, in a normal, non-crazed kinda way lmao, like im not silently talking to myself in my head abt the shining and begging for someone, anyone to talk to me abt the shining, i was legit on the brink of madness, i couldt contain myself thats how much i loved it lmao

anyway. for now its not compeltley lost, i still do like it, but idk, the last time i watched it i could jsut tell i wasnt as interested as the previous times, and thats when i was like 'damn it, this is it ig' and it was super sad. it felt like a big loss, but then again im happy i got out of it, like i said. maybe it was for the better! now i gotta find smth else to occupy me and my attention for the next couple of weeks or ill go insane!!!

this whole the shining phase ended like 2 or 3 months ago or smth. now im jsut mucking around. ive been watching th eoffice over and over again bc yeah i do love it but liek theres literally nothing else to occupy my attention with. and i feel kinda bad saying that, like i feel stupid saying i need smth to constantly be keeping my attention or like keeping me entertained, but like otherwise i just feel like i have no meaning or purpose or anything to keep me going, and i need smth! im not depressed or anything tho i swear 🙏

anyway I LOVE THE CATCHER IN THE RYE!!!! in history today my favourite book of all time was like very briefly mentioned and i wanted to explode when i saw it, i so badly wanted to mention it but there was no way id do it in front of anyone so yeah. holden caulfield is fr me, or he was most like year last year when i was like so alone at school and hated everybody. i still dont like most people but its not as bad as it used to be

anyway i feel really stupid writing this whole thing, idkw, but yeah, for now idk what ill do. i am going in an out of different writing projects/little stories that ive made up but i can never commit to just one thing. i am going back to my main project tho, and im really happy for once because im just writing. im not worrying about what other people might think (even tho i literally dont show it to anyone i legit just write for myself i jsut get rlly stupid sometimes,) im honestly just having fun and writing what i like, and i think thats what writings all about. its not about proving yourself to anyone or trying to impress anyone, or trying to make yourself seem all big and idk intellectual and all smartsy fartsy and stuff. its litereally just to express yourself and have fun and put all your amazing ideas down onto paper, i love writing so much, especially when i dont convince myself that my writing is shit and tell myself that it's not good enough and if people were to see it they wouldnt be as impressed as i want them to be

but anyways, thats all! its been a while since ive been on here so yeah. i know no one relaly sees these but theyre still fun to write. i just like expressing myself, i feel like im honestly kind of better off if no one sees these. like it would be nice to have like a tiny little community or some friends on here or smth since tbh even tho ive been on here for like a year and a half i still dont rlly fully understand how this app works </3 im just here for fun! so anyway

thats all folks! ski you later everybody! 😼

(sidenote, yes ik i dont know how to spell 'literally' i keep messing it up😻)

[livecharliereaction]

U know what. Im reading the umi mangas but instead of making proper separate tags and all im just going to dump it all in one big post under the read me for each existing tag #Yay

Id like to read it on my own unfortunately im obsessed with Talking

Starting from ep2 cos i feel like it

Obvious spoilers im not going to pretend like i havent read all the vns

Shes so cute

Actually think about her and george a lot recently. From what i think shannon is.... its very very sad to me actually... shes living a sort of bride fantasy but its not with the one she REALLY wants right... And i find it interesting that most people default to calling yasuda sayo (i think it suits her enough and im used to seeing it around too) but the idea of her "true name" being the one that is exclusively used by george in the series is kind of interesting to me... some sort of declaration... I think this manga will overall make me decide what to call them anyway im using yasuda right now to make sure its not confusing but yeah ok

Actually not sure how to interpret that belief of hers either... Im still not completely sure on what i think magic means like i think the simple answer is Love but. I dont know

ALREADY PUNCHING ME IN THE FACE WHAT? KIYO?? Ok maybe thats why then. Hmmmh.

This scene i briefly forgot about actually but i did remember it the other day and out of all the magic items and stuff the mirror thing is the most obvious. So awesome

They draw her insane pretty im kinda obsessed

jessica said georges into "family oriented girls" oughhhh I was thinking about this too well not this exact scene but i did notice shannon visibly get a little quiet whenever george brought up kids. I used to hate the couple so i just assumed it was just their dynamic like george says things and shannon seems like she doesnt even like him But yeah.

Eva one of the people ever isnt she.

Well she does too #HALF COUSIN

UGH. i love her. one reason i wanted to read was to check some subtle things i didnt pay attention to for example is shannon+kanon the only person to call herself furniture? like eva here saying shes worthless n shit but not using that word. Another thing i wanna see how often those two are in the same scene and generally just idk staring at them

Hi kanon. Lmfao i was reading my old livetweet i kept saying he looks like a girl. Yeah. Kanon shannon appearance counter: theyre both here yes but theyre alone

Bae. I missed her. Omfg is she lowkey being born here. I think she doesnt appear in ep1 except maybe tea party... Oh man

like u see it right. im not sure how long ago this was though i forgor even though they just said it. less than 6 years surely

yes ok i checked it was... lets think

i love them

this too makes sense to me even more now. She wouldnt want to end up too close to george like physically i dont mean sex necessarily but like, at all and george is sheepish enough that he might not even have asked

jessica ur so fun to me. favorite cousin? ohhh but i love maria too But jessica is up there. I love her so bad

Now this is funny as hell to me u know. she was saying she wants a boyfriend tooooo and look whos going to show up sooner or later Extremely funny. I remember thinking her and kanon were super crazy good so... I want to OBSERVE

theyre talking about the affinity for seeing magic CLICK CLICK CLICK i dont remember exactly WHO was able to see beatrice surely it was just maria and well shannon and kanon

ugh

There it is #REAL ohh but i like the vn translation phrasing better

EYES WIDE OPEN. KANON IS STANDING THERE WITH HIM

LMFAO. I think he means it too... But it was shannon who suggested to jessica shed do it too... These things can coexist to me

they made him look CRAZY hes complaining. Ok gender dysphoria!

shes so cute i understand what happens next kiss kiss fall in love

Wait i dont like a lot of kanon depictions besides og sprites but i like this he looks CRAZY

OH GIRL SHE DOESNT KNOW WHO SHES TALKING TO ITS SO CRAZY.

Apparently theres a 30 image limit per post but thats ok im alr like 1/3rd done with this ep so ill just split it up. ANYWAY I FORGOT THIS IS HOW HE ANSWERS ITS. He was NOT thinking about it before this. Oh ur crazy. Since the sayo thing bothered me i thought about it a lot too like why yoshiya where does it come from. Im sure theres something w the letters n stuff but idk japanese so i wont know. Yoshiya