#like i word vomited when talking to him because i was so nervous

[itostea]

my first & last love (gojo x reader)

satoru realizes he's in love with you after you suggest he set you up with suguru

tags: fem! reader, Gojo praises you like A LOT! slight miscommunications, childhood friends to lovers, reader gets drunk & satoru helps, he's a lovesick idiot & dramatic, both yours & his pov, gojo’s implied to be taller than reader, slightly suggestive bc it’s gojo, slight angst

word count: 11k

The first time Gojo Satoru learned true, unadulterated jealousy was on a Friday night out in his sports car–the crickets chirping to the melody of a random song. 

It was real jealousy—not just simple, petty envy. Not like the envy he felt when someone got to taste the limited edition cupcakes at the bakery before he did or the envy of studying hard and getting a lower score than someone who didn’t (which is a lie because Gojo was that very person who was effortlessly good at everything he did). 

Either way, he’s never felt the bite of jealousy, breaking the flesh as blood drips slowly, lingering as if it could never be washed away from his skin. Never felt it smother his throat with needles and leave him with a metallic taste in his mouth. That is, until today.

It was colder than usual but he still insisted on grabbing some ice-cream from the local convenience store, declaring it was his your reward for putting up with the party Sukuna hosted–the same party that ended in your dress being soaked in vomit. The atmosphere was perfect for sentiment, for talking–for confessing. 

You’re humming to the beat of the song, licking your lips clean of the ice cream you just ate. “Satoru,” you murmur his name softly, staring at him through your lashes. 

“Yeah?” His eyes drink in the sight of you: your droopy eyes from sleep, the faded lip tint on your lips, the hoodie he let you borrow that’s obviously a few sizes too big on you. There’s hardly any light coming in but he can still feel your eyes on him, the tension so thick he thinks he might suffocate from it. 

For a moment, he’s scared, fearful of what you were going to say because he knows this silence. This is the very silence that happens before someone confesses to him, the same suspense that he has to mentally prepare himself for since he knew he was going to break another heart. And he’s terrified that he might have to do it to you–his friend, his neighbor, someone who he’s known for a very long time. 

“I need to tell you something,” you start and he winces, shifting uncomfortably on the driver’s seat. 

“You do?” He mutters. You’re nervous. He can tell because he’s known you long enough to understand what you’re feeling–long enough to know that your eyes are darting from place to place, a habit of yours.

His chest squeezes when you take a deep breath just as he exhales, already making his mind to grant you a swift rejection. He hopes you can forgive him after this.

“--I like Getou and I need your help.”

“Listen, I’m sorry but I just don’t see you that way–”

He blinks, wondering if he heard you right or if he was drunk (he didn’t drink at the party because he was your ride home). “Wait what?”

It was your turn to blink now. “I like Getou and I–”

“I heard you the first time,” he cuts you off hastily, clearing his throat to play it cool. He runs a hand through his hair, grazing the side of his undercut. “Okay wow.”

Gojo mentally curses himself for not knowing what else to say other than humming pensively, busying himself by mixing the ice-cream in the tiny container. He still needs time to process, to mentally upload your words to his brain. You like Getou and not him? He pauses, repeating that thought again. 

You like Getou and not him. Part of him tells himself that this is exactly what he wanted since your friendship wouldn’t go to ruin. You managed not to catch feelings for him–managed not to fall for him like many others. Yet, he’s confused when another part of him doesn’t respond too well once he realizes that this was you he was dealing with.

“That’s not weird right?” You question, bringing your knees up to your chest and propping your chin atop of them to watch his reaction–reminding him to keep it cool. 

“Nah it’s not weird at all,” he said, not thinking straight when his next words escaped his lips. “So why Suguru?” And not me? Though, he keeps that last part to himself. 

“Well isn’t it obvious? He’s tall, handsome, and has a good personality.”

Am I not that? He asks himself, not bothered by how stuck up he may seem. “That’s not very specific from someone who likes him.”

You huff and he can tell you’re narrowing your eyes at him. “I know you don’t wanna hear me yap about the specifics, Satoru.”

“I do.” He says quickly.

You make a noise of surprise, looking interested in his sudden intrigue. “Well okay… Suguru’s very caring and attentive. Being around him makes me feel warm inside you know? I’m not sure when I started liking him but I just know that I just really want to be closer to him. And it doesn’t help that he’s just so smart and nice. And his looks are just a bonus.”

“Oh,” he utters, not even bothering to curse himself for his lack of response. He tries a weak smile. “You must really like him.”

Gojo can’t help but furrow his brows at the semi-embarrassed expression you wear—as if you were flustered at the mere thought of having a crush. “Oh, was I that obvious?” You ask, not even bothering to deny the fact that you were undoubtedly head over heels for his best friend.

Oh god, he thinks he might be sick and he doesn’t know why. 

“Are you going to help me?” Your voice cuts him out of his reverie and he’s cut back into reality–the reality being the anticipation in your eyes. Did you always look this pretty? 

Gojo nearly flinches at the thoughts that cross his mind, blaming the unprocessed shock for being the cause of these obscure ideas. He coughs. “Hold on. So you don’t like me right?”

“What? No I–” your eyes widen in understanding. “Oh so that’s what that was all about. You thought the person I liked was you! How cocky can you be to think everyone’s in love with you?”

“It’s not cocky if it’s true. I’m just really lovable y’know?”

You let out a sarcastic laugh. “That can’t be true since I’m not everyone.”

I know, he thinks to himself, staying silent as he watches you shuffle in your seat. He didn’t just dislike this idea you proposed, he hated it.  It wasn’t hard to just decline and keep it like that–let you figure your feelings on your own. 

Yet, something about the near-pleading look in your eyes made him reconsider and it filled him with an urge to smooth the wrinkles on your expression. He sighs loudly, rubbing the invisible crease in between his brows. “Well I guess you came to the right person because I’m an expert at this. 5 star ratings and all that. But what makes you think I’m going to do this for free?”

“Uh the goodness of your heart?”

“Cute,” he laughs. “But no. I want a coffee from the place everyday for a month.”

“What?! Are you insane? That means I’d have to wake up early everyday to get in line!” 

He shakes his head, waving his finger around with a disappointed expression. “A small price for love.”

“I don’t understand why you even need me for that. You can buy the whole shop yourself, ass,” you whisper the last part behind your palm, making his eyes light up in amusement.

“What was that?”

“Nothing. Actually you know what? Fine,” you huff. “You’re right. It is a small price for love. But I’m not walking back and forth around campus to deliver your coffee.” 

“I got that covered,” he grins, already coming up with a plan in his head. He likes this, the banter you two typically enjoyed. It made your duo, a duo. In a normal situation, he’d relax and continue bothering you. Still, the feeling of dread gnaws at his throat and he tries to swallow it–tries to ignore it by pretending to be the same, goofy Gojo you’re used to. And he’s starting to think it’s hard to do that when you look up at him with such genuine gratitude. 

“Satoru.”

“Hm?”

“Thank you, I mean it.”

Gojo feels that emotion again, that visceral feeling where he might go sick and vomit all over the car. “Yeah.”

He thinks he would’ve preferred if you confessed to him instead. 

Gojo wonders if stress (if you can call that) is enough to make someone wake up with a hangover the next day. He didn’t drink last night but he thinks he might have–considering the headache that was interrupting his morning. 

He’s in the middle of downing a glass of water when his phone buzzes, your name popping up as a notification. 

(Name): i’m gonna get ur coffee pls come 

Him: come ??? cum

(Name): it’s too early to be doing this 

He sees the bubbles appear before they disappear for a while, only popping up again when he’s in the middle of cracking an egg over the pan 

(Name): SATORU 

(Name): OHMYGOD SATORY SOI SOS 

Him: WHAT 

Him: HELLO??? 

(Name): GETOUS HERE OMG IM GONNA 

(Name): HE SAID HI TO ME 

(Name): WHAT DO I DO?

Gojo grips his phone a bit tighter, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek. He sighs.

Him: say hi back 

Him: and then go PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

(Name): no wtf and i meant what do i after this silly 

(Name): i don’t know what to do im literally an npc rn

(Name): jk he just said bye :(

Him: should’ve done what i told u to do

Another name pops up from the top and his eyes scan the name, his brows raising in curiosity. He huffs at the message, feeling a wave of nausea cross him.

Suguru: You’re close friends with (Name) right?

Him: yeah why 

Suguru: Nothing

It’s silent for a few seconds and Gojo’s back to eating his eggs, tempted to pop a Tylenol to ease the growing headache. Contrary to popular belief, he was against the reliance of pain-relieving meds, opting to let his body figure things out on its own. Luckily for him, having food in his stomach was enough to relieve the headache.

His mind wanders back to the night in the car where you told him to help you with your crush on his best friend–not fully coming to terms with the fact that he wished you liked him instead. Since when did he start feeling this way and why did he need another man to make him realize he liked or even loved you? The thought of anyone having you for themselves was like hearing the sound of nails against a chalkboard and he was jealous. He finally admitted it. 

Gojo Satoru wasn’t an idiot when it came to his feelings and he’d be a fool if he kept denying his undeniable irritation that came with your crush for Suguru. He places the unwashed dish atop some other bowls and utensils, reminding himself to get to that later since his priority was not to keep you waiting at the coffee shop. 

Another buzz and Satoru nearly trips over his feet at the dread he gets from seeing his best friend’s message. Are you kidding me? He thinks to himself as he reads the message again. 

Suguru: She’s cute

Yeah, he thinks he might be sick again.

Music’s playing in the background to substitute the sound of chatter that’d usually fill the room if Shoko were here. It wasn’t rare for Shoko to not flake on parties and it was even rarer for you to leave your comfort zone and go to one–especially the last one hosted by Sukuna; but this one was different. Suguru was the host and you’d be an idiot to miss it. 

You flinch at the feeling of your mascara poking the inside of your eye, cursing quietly as you take a q-tip to fix the mistake. 

The buzz of your phone makes you freeze.

Gojo: omw to ur house 

Gojo: ill be there in 10 

You: wait satoru don’t get mad but what do i wear 

Gojo: …

Gojo: YOU DIDNT LIKE THINK ABOUT THAT AN HR AGO?

You: I WANNA STAND OUT TO ATTRACT THE LOML OKAY? 

You: so i need ur opinion 

Gojo: dude

Gojo: ok

Gojo: just wear whatever u want it’ll be fine 

You: yeah but what specifically?

Gojo: not smth that makes you look like a grandma 

Gojo: like that dress u wore to the last party 

Gojo: no offense

You: but i liked that dress :(((( 

You: was it that bad?? I mean i had to throw it out bc of the vomit anyways

Gojo: it made u look like a grandma but in a good way 

You: wow okay thanks

Gojo: you looked nice 

Gojo: ANYWAYS  

Gojo: a pair of jeans 

Gojo: and that light blue long sleeve that shows ur shoulders 

You: really? 

Gojo: yeah and i’m leaving my apartment now so hurry up 

You like the message, tapping your lips to even out the lip tint before you rush to put on the shirt and jeans. Doing a quick double-take in the mirror, you spin once and prop your hands on your hips, snapping a few selfies to commemorate this day. 

You’re not sure how much time passes until you hear excessive honking outside, the sound of your phone buzzing as you see Gojo’s caller id. It’s enough to make your eyes roll as you grab your bag–leaving the door locked and the lights off. 

Gojo’s grin is boyish and teasing as his eyes scan you from top to bottom. “Oh look at you,” he coos. “You’re actually wearing what I told you to wear.”

“Well I felt like listening today,” you murmur, feeling a small ripple of embarrassment pass you. 

“Atta girl.”

“Shut up,” you mumble, feeling a grin form when you hear him chuckle. He puts his car into reverse mode, propping his arm on the top of your seat. Up close, you can get a stronger whiff of his cologne–its musk and earthiness slowing your heartbeat, calming you. Your eyes scan his outfit: a black pullover layered atop white t-shirt, paired with a pair of pants that were on the edge of being joggers and trousers.

On anyone else, the outfit wouldn’t have done them good like it did with Gojo. To your displeasure and awe, he looked effortlessly classy. And if he noticed your lingering gaze, he didn’t mention it. 

“What’s your game plan?” His voice draws you back to reality and you watch as he sets the car back into drive mode. 

“Game plan?”

“That’s right,” he glances at you, his shades sliding lower on his nose bridge. “Your plan to seduce the love of your life.”

“I’m not going to seduce him!” You gape, narrowing your eyes at his widening smile. His hand reaches down to turn the volume of the song a bit louder, stopping at the upcoming red light. 

“I’m just joking with you,” he laughs, his eyebrows furrowing slightly before that smile returns to his face, not quite meeting his eyes like it usually does. He sighs before breaking into a laugh that almost sounds bitter. “I’d pay to see that though.”

At the party, you’d imagine yourself “mingling” with the crowd and letting loose–being the life of the party. Unfortunately for you, your feet are still stuck on the kitchen floor and you’re glued to Gojo’s side. You’d like to blame it on the vomit incident from Sukuna’s party and you’re fortunate enough to not be known as the “girl that someone threw up on.” 

Either way, you weren’t especially fond of the fact that you were keeping Gojo from having fun somewhere else. Like in one of the unoccupied rooms upstairs or in the living room playing some drinking games. It’s enough to make you feel somewhat guilty and suddenly regretful that you even came to this party. 

You tap his shoulder in the kitchen, offering him a reassuring smile. “Satoru. You don’t have to stay with me. I can manage myself!” 

“That’s what you said last time,” he chuckles, rummaging through Getou’s fridge to search for something sweet, frowning when he sees traditional Japanese snacks that his grandparents would eat. “What the hell?” He murmurs to himself.

“I mean it,” you say, taking a few steps back. “You have some fun. I don’t want to bother you too much.”

“You’re not–”

“Satoru. (Name),” a velvety voice greets, all too familiar. A warmth spreads over you. “You made it.”

“Getou,” you murmured to yourself, glancing at Gojo who was already staring at you. 

For a second, you see a subtle tick in his jaw, a sight you blame on the lighting since he’s back to normal the moment he turns to face Getou. He grins that teasing smile of his. “Suguru.”

“You looking through my fridge again, Satoru?” The brunette huffs, kicking the fridge’s door shut lightly–exchanging the grin with his friend. Your heart squeezes as he casts a lingering look at you, his smile polite. “Hey (Name). Good seeing you here.”

“Huh?” You perk up. “Oh you too?”

You inwardly curse at yourself for how awkward you were, giving Gojo a scathing look as he hides his laughter behind his palm. Luckily for you, Getou’s sweet and he was also good at redirecting topics. “You want something to drink?” 

“Oh sure,” you blink, offering a thankful smile. “Thank you Getou–”

“Suguru.” 

You pause, cocking your head to the side in confusion. “Sorry?” 

“Call me Suguru,” he hands you a red, plastic cup–his smile pretty enough to make your breath hitch. “We’ve known each other long enough.”

You feel your heart race as he looks at you expectantly, as if you knew what he wanted you to do next. You fidget, suddenly more bashful at the attention he was giving you. “Thank you Suguru.”

“No problem,” he smiles and you like how he looks satisfied with you. He hands another red cup to Satoru who stood beside you, the sarcastic grin of his returning. You take a tentative sip of the booze, watching curiously as Satoru and Suguru talked amongst themselves–reconnecting despite seeing each other only a day ago. 

You observe the two of them, mapping the details of Suguru’s face before your eyes land on Satoru–suddenly aware of the fact that the boy you spent most of your youth with grew up. Sure, you know that his face attracts attention from everyone but that was a token from childhood. It just didn’t hit you that he matured, grew up to be the man most would dream of dating. The realization is to make you wonder if Gojo ever registered the fact that you were growing too.

Slowly, you take another sip of your drink, blinking slowly as the alcohol settles in your system. Gojo’s the first to notice when you stumble, how your skin seems to heat up. “Hey hey,” he holds you by the shoulders, his voice soft. And if you paid closer attention, you would’ve seen the way Getou’s brows raised at how gentle his friend was acting towards you. “You okay?” 

Amidst your drunken state, you realize that Gojo didn’t bother drinking any of the liquor in his cup during his conversation with Suguru. And Suguru. Sweet Suguru who puts the pieces together and confirms that you’re a lightweight, the guilt evident in his expression. “Oh shit. I forgot how strong this liquor is.” 

“I’m okay,” you mumble and step forward, ready to excuse yourself to the restroom. Gojo looks like he’s about to say something until a group of unfamiliar faces barge into the kitchen, their faces bright as they greet Getou and Gojo with intentions to keep them occupied. Among the chatter and crowd, you find it easy to slip away–rushing to find a restroom. 

The first one you went in was already used by a couple that you remembered mumbling apologies to. The others were either locked or used. At some point, your gut told you to go upstairs and you staggered into an unoccupied bathroom where you splashed cold water on your face–sighing at how nice it felt against your skin.

The music’s only a fraction of its noise from up here and you’re surprised that there’s not much of a group upstairs. There’s a funny feeling in your stomach as you crouch slightly, mentally cursing yourself for downing the whole cup so quickly, ruining your chances to talk with Suguru–coherently at least. Part of you wants to sulk over your spoiled opportunities but another part of you just wants to crash on the tiled floor and sleep–rest your eyes for a bit. 

You’re thankful your mind was still conscious enough to rationalize the unsanitary conditions of the bathroom floor, opting to curl up in one of the hallways instead–shivering at the feeling of cold marble beneath you. Your eyes droop, a yawn escaping you. And you’re almost certain you would’ve fallen asleep if not for the gentle shaking of your shoulders. 

“Stop,” you whine softly, your vision blurry as you catch a glimpse of hair the color of snow and a pair of worried filled blue eyes. Your protests turn quickly to bemusement. “Satoru? What are you doing here?”

You think he smiles as he kneels down on one knee to be eye level with you. “How about I get you off the ground first?” 

“I don’t wanna. Let me sleep here,” you shake your head, ignoring how your body felt warm at how softly he treated you. 

“C’mon,” he chuckles. “The ground’s dirty. Let's get you to a bed at least.”

In your drunken state, your mind still decides it favors a soft comforter over cold marble and you see his eyes soften when you go limp in his arms–letting him lift you from the ground. “Good girl.”

Your mind goes fuzzy at the sound of that and you’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or something else that makes your temperature rise. In that simple moment, you let his arms wrap around you, cradling you to his chest as he makes his way downstairs. All your thoughts stop as your eyes close, drowning the sound of the party out as you permit sleep to take over. His hands give your thighs an occasional squeeze, the gesture oddly intimate yet you don’t bother questioning it or objecting to it. 

Even with the veil of sleep dropping on your form, you still recognize Suguru’s voice as he tells Satoru to take care of you, his tone apologetic–having been the one to give you the liquor. They talk for a bit and once more, you feel the bounce of each step as he carries you out the house.

You’re barely awake when Gojo puts you in the passenger seat and you feel disappointment wash over you when he stops holding you. You’re not sure when you grabbed onto the sleeve of his shirt, your eyes half-lidded as you peered up at him. “Don’t go.”

A noise of protest escapes your lips when he removes your cold hand from his shirt gently, rather taking it in between his warmer ones. “I won’t.”

“Satoru.”

“Hm?”

“I like when you compliment me.”

“Oh yeah?” He says, laughing a bit. “It’s hard not to.”

The music and cheers in Suguru’s house are still audible even in Gojo’s car, your vision getting darker and darker with each blink. Still, you can still feel Gojo’s hand gripping yours–his thumb rubbing circles on the skin as you invite sleep back in, taking deep breaths as you breathe in his cologne. 

And as sleep came to life, you allowed the dreams to live as well. 

Was there such a thing as a relationship between dreams and memories? In moments of delirium, you can’t single out what’s real and what’s not–was it a dream or did it actually happen?

But now that days have passed and you’ve given yourself more time, you’re certain that Gojo was the one who carried you out of the house and spent his night caring for you. So you ruled out the possibility that the night was a dream, rather a memory that made you feel soft inside–grateful yet unsure. And if you wanted to ponder harder, you would’ve done so if not for the hell you were experiencing this week. 

Forgetting the content during a quiz. Getting yelled at by your boss. Having stepped in bird shit. Waking up late nearly every day because you’d forget to put your alarm on. 

If that wasn’t enough, you got in an argument with your parents over the phone. It was about something stupid and you were so frustrated that you ended up walking to some 7/11–buying yourself an ice-cream to cheer yourself up. The argument was so dumb and you weren’t even sure what you guys were even arguing about. All you knew that you should probably call them later to talk it out; you also knew that this week couldn’t get any worse.

What was Satoru doing right now? You think to yourself, pulling out your phone to check your messages–frowning when you saw none from him. Your eyes land on a message from Suguru, seeing the link he sent you to some video he found funny or intriguing. After the party, you were shocked to see an unknown number texting you, claiming it was Suguru and that Satoru gave your number to him. The day that happened, you texted him using exclamation marks and thanked him–smiling at your phone as you two exchanged witty messages with one another. 

You sighed, unlocking your phone and clicking Satoru’s contact and phoning him. You almost hang up after several rings but you hear his voice after the nth ring. “Hello?”

“Satoru?” You say, your voice cracking the second your lips part to speak. You weren’t expecting to cry and neither did Satoru–though you can hear the concern laced in his voice as he questions your whereabouts. 

“Where are you sweetheart?” You hear rustling in the background amidst his voice and your sniffles. “I’ll pick you up. Your location’s shared with me right?”

“Mhm,” you wipe your eyes, fidgeting with the hem of your hoodie. 

“Okay just stay there and don’t go anywhere. I’ll be there in a few. Don’t cry (Name).”

You think you might cry harder with how sweet his voice was. 

Satoru thinks he might be the only one who notices the rift between you and him. And he’s not sure if he’s the one causing it or if it’s you. But after that night with you (in his car again), he’s been thinking about how soft you were in his arms; how he liked the way your head drooped against his chest. Or maybe he likes you but he’s not going to think about that unless he wants another headache. 

Regardless, he finds himself looking at his phone sporadically, subconsciously eager to see your name pop up unexpectedly–eager for things to go back to normal. Even though you two still speak, he’s almost sure that he’s not imagining the awkward tension in the air. 

Was he too intrusive when he carried you out to his car? Were you mad at him because he didn’t leave Suguru and you alone in the kitchen? It was a selfish thing to do, he admits. His original idea was to leave you alone with Suguru so you’d get to chat with him–get to know him like you intended to do at the party; but seeing Suguru give you that sly smile of his was enough to make Gojo ditch his plans of playing Cupid. 

If Gojo was a good man, he’d feel happy that you were getting what you wanted since he knew you weren’t the only one interested. Like with the message Suguru sent to Satoru and how he eyed you at the party; how he called Satoru over for a bit and told him that he understood why people liked you or found you attractive; how he commented on how the shirt you wore suited you. 

No shit, I picked it, he thought to himself as he recalled that night. Satoru always knew you were beautiful and he hated that everyone else knew too. You weren’t even his yet but he didn’t want to share you–to let anyone else hold you or have you. Seeing you blush and smile shyly at his best friend made him want to puke—made him want to claw his eyes out. That should be him and god he wishes it was.

He was selfish yet he never promised to be good. Yet, this was for you. He wanted you to be happy, is what he told himself whenever he saw you and Suguru talking. 

His phone buzzes and it’s almost embarrassing how quickly he snatches it, the anticipation in his eyes fading when he sees that it’s Suguru messaging him about the party today. Satoru sighs, rubbing the spot between his brows as he leans on the kitchen counter, suddenly reminded that he planned a party at his place today. It was an impulsive decision to forget about the tension between you two and Satoru’s kinda wishing he took the time to talk it out with you rather than planning something else. 

He invited a good amount of people and was going to invite you as well to give him a reason to call you. But lucky for him, you made things easier for him by calling him. Satoru thinks it’s not healthy for his blood temperature to rise just at the sight of your name on his phone and he’s already grinning when he picks up. “Hello?”

“Satoru?” 

Oh. He pauses, his brows furrowing at how your voice cracked as you tried to hide your sniffles. His first thought was to wonder who made you sad and he thinks it’s scary how hearing you cry was enough to send his emotions in a frenzy. But you needed him and he didn’t want you to be alone. “Where are you sweetheart?” He asks, the nickname flowing off his tongue before he can stop. “I’ll pick you up. Your location’s shared with me right?”

“Mhm,” You mumbled back and his heart nearly snapped in two with how dejected you sounded. He frowns, grabbing his jacket and his keys–rushing to slip on his sneakers. 

“Okay just stay there and don’t go anywhere. I’ll be there in a few. Don’t cry (Name).”

You make a sound of understanding and he hangs up, his finger tapping to click on Suguru’s contact. Satoru hears other familiar voices in the background but he doesn’t pay much attention to it. 

“What’s up Satoru–?”

“Party’s off.”

“What? Wait what are you–”

“Sorry something came up. I’ll tell you later,” he says, hanging up before his friend can say anything else. He knows he should feel bad for flaking out last minute but his list of priorities had you at the top of it. And he really didn’t care if anyone else would understand. 

You’re regretting the choice of shorts in the chilly night air and the ice-cream you ate wasn’t helping you shiver any less. 

The way Satoru sounded made that warm, fuzzy feeling settle in your stomach again. He sounded like he would drop whatever he was doing just to get to you and it made you feel special. You think back to the sound of “sweetheart” from his lips, shaking your head when you feel your blood get warm.

“(Name)?” Satoru’s voice startles you from your thoughts and you think the sound of it could erase all your troubles. “You alright?” He asks, shrugging the jacket off his shoulders and draping them over your legs, kneeling down to see your face.

You only nod. “I want to go home.”

“Yeah I can take you back–”

“No,” you shake your head. “Back to your place.”

For a moment, you’ve stunned him but that surprise left as fast as it arrived. He sighs, tapping your knee with his finger. “Usually dinner comes first–”

“Not like that you idiot,” you kick him lightly, a grin forming on your lips. “Your methods of comforting are weird.”

“Yeah?” He laughs, the sound blending with the wind. “Well maybe I’m not trying to comfort you,” he eyes you with a teasing glint in his eyes and flashes a lopsided grin. He looked almost sweet as he did sly, the blend making your heart pick up in pace. 

You squirm, mustering a tone of nonchalance. “I changed my mind. I’m going back to my place.”

This time he chuckles, his eyes narrowing in amusement. “Nuh uh. It’s my job to wipe that frown off your face,” he says, the corny phrase making you roll your eyes. “C’mon, I’ll be good to you.”

You pretend to think, ignoring the attentive expression he wore. “Fine. I guess I’ll let you take me home.”

“That’s my girl,” he grinned, standing up to his full height. You beam at him, matching his steps as you two reach his door. By the time the two of you were settled at his place, you already spoke to your parents in private–clearing up the misunderstandings like Satoru reminded you to do. You were glad you had him and even more glad that things were falling back to place. 

Your eyes scan your surroundings, noticing how he must’ve tidied things up. “Did you clean your place?”

“Hm?” He grabs two mugs from the cabinet. “Oh yeah. I was going to have a party here.”

“Today?”

“That’s right,” he drawls, glancing at you from the corner of his eyes. “I was going to call you to see if you wanted to go.”

“Really?” That was a shock to you. “Are you still gonna have one today?”

“Nah. Canceled it last minute.”

You pause, raising your brows as you try not to jump to conclusions. “Why’d you cancel it?”

“Had better things to do. I'd rather hang out with you anyways,” he says casually, smiling when he finds the packets of hot cocoa. “Found it!”

Did he cancel the party for me? You think to yourself, a bit surprised that you came to that conclusion; but if you were right and he did, you wouldn’t know what to feel other than appreciation and maybe something else. Whether that was true or not, you know that you should be feeling guilt and not giddiness from having him prioritize you. Was it normal to feel this way for Satoru? You’re about to let your thoughts fill your head but you feel your breath hitch at how he seems to lean closer to you. 

His hands move you by the hips, the touch barely lasting five seconds. “Sorry I gotta get the spoons,” he murmurs, paying no mind to how you hold your breath. Your eyes fall to his biceps, swallowing a gasp as you see how the black material of his shirt moved with every movement he makes. There was no way he was human when he looked like that.

Oh my god, you think to yourself, suddenly mortified at the fact that you were checking him out. What was wrong with you right now? You always knew Gojo was attractive but you didn’t think he was this attractive. And if he had any idea of your internal conflict he didn’t pay it any mind. 

“Can you go get the movie ready for me?”

“Uh huh,” you nod immediately, quickening your pace as you try to distract yourself. By the time he sits next to you, the blankets and snacks are already placed neatly on the living room table. You smile and mutter a thank you when he hands you the mug of hot cocoa. 

“Feel better?” He asks, propping an arm on the head of the couch once you’re halfway through the movie: a random romcom you picked to cheer you up. Even as someone who claims he’d rather watch a movie with more action, you think the drama that comes with romcoms intrigues him–much more than he’d like to admit. 

You take a sip of your drink, your eyes flitting to him. “Much better.”

“I bet,” he murmurs, his eyes glancing at the way your knees touched. The scene panels to a teary confession the female lead does, the music dramatic with strings in the background. You watch intently, observing the expressions both characters make on screen.

“Y’know, I never understood how they can always come up with a speech like that on the spot,” Satoru comments, plopping a few gummy bears in his mouth. “Isn’t that unrealistic?”

“It’s a movie,” you point out, watching as the male lead hung onto every word the female lead had to say. “It’s not supposed to be realistic.”

“I guess you’re right. But that stuff apparently happens in real life right?”

“Wouldn’t you know? You have people confessing to you all the time.”

“I don’t give them much time to continue speaking,” he shrugs. 

You don’t like how uneasy you feel after he says that. “Well, maybe it’s love that makes this kind of stuff happen.”

This earns you an amused snicker. “Of course you’d say that. You gonna do that with Suguru? Confess to him from the bottom of your heart?”

You roll your eyes. “To do that, I’d have to be in love with him.”

“Are you?”

“No,” you give him an incredulous look. “I hardly know the guy. I just really like him.”

He makes a sound of understanding but you feel as if you’re deluding yourself when you see the look of relief cross his face. You turn to him, the movie forgotten all of a sudden. “Would you do that?”

“What? Confess to Suguru with the bottom of my heart?” 

“Yeah sure. That’s what I meant.” you huff, seeing his teasing grin form. You sigh. “No like…confess to someone you love.”

He’s quiet, the faraway look in his eyes confirming that he’s deep in thought. You’re not sure why a pang of irritation hits you when you realize that there might be someone Satoru’s in love with. And you’re not sure if it’s because he’s not telling you or because you want to be that someone. You go with the former because you’re supposed to like Suguru. 

His eyes wander to meet yours and the tick in his jaw makes you nervous–makes your palms sweaty because he’s never looked at you like that. You’re not even sure words could describe what emotion he had on his face. He smiles–not the smile that’s crooked and boyish. It’s the smile that’s sharp and makes his eyes narrow. “I might.”

“You might?” You ask, hating how breathless your voice sounded to your ears–something that he notices with the way amusement practically glimmers in his eyes. You swallow a gasp when his gaze falls to your lips, quickly flying back to your eyes. 

“Maybe,” he whispers and you can’t help but wet your lips, feeling faint when the bright blue of his eyes darkens to black. You don’t flinch when his head tilts, his arm coming to the side to trap you between the couch. His cologne overwhelms you, makes you drunk on him. He’s so close that you can feel his breath hit your face. 

“Satoru–” 

The sound of your phone buzzing crushes the tension quickly and you let him lean back–looking as if he had more to say. You feel a smidge of disappointment as you grab your phone. “It’s Suguru,” you say and you’re not sure why your inner voice begs Satoru to tell you to ignore the phone call–to act like he cares more. 

“Shouldn’t you answer it?” He questions and you hate that sinking feeling in your stomach when he doesn’t even spare a glance at you–as if acting like he wasn’t about to kiss you seconds ago. You can only frown, nodding as you watch him stand up–still not offering you one single look. “I’ll clean up.”

As you glance at your phone, at the name of Suguru appearing on your screen, you hope for the slightest bit of joy–that lovesick feeling you get whenever you’d see him. Yet, it felt wrong. This felt wrong. And apparently, Suguru could tell from your voice that there was something bugging you. 

“Is everything alright? You don’t sound too good.”

Your eyes linger on Satoru’s figure moving to the kitchen. You think Suguru mentions something about a date but you don’t pay much attention, not feeling all that bad as you drown out his voice. “Yeah. I’m fine. What were you saying?”

“I was asking if you wanted to go to dinner with me tomorrow. I’ll pick you up at 7 and we can–”

“Sure,” you say, trying to ignore the way your body lurches at your response–as if it didn’t want this. “Sure. I’ll see you at 7.”

You don’t catch what he says when he hangs up, only thinking of how Satoru looked at you when he was leaning closer. The thought doesn’t horrify you as much as it should but you think that if he had kissed you, you probably would’ve kissed him back. 

If someone told you a month ago that you were going on a date with Suguru, you would’ve cried tears of joy and celebrated. But now, you’re almost undeniably feeling a wave of indifference hit you and it feels awful. Suguru’s perfect–his sharp features and his charming smile that’d send anyone into a frenzied mess. Or maybe most tend to fixate on how suave he is with his words–mixing the subtlest of flirtations with simple compliments.

He’s everything you could’ve asked for. Yet, you find yourself missing the ruthless beauty you saw in Satoru–the striking blue of his eyes and the rare color of his hair. You find yourself missing the rasp of his voice, how it’d soften that night when he comforted you; you find yourself missing his warm and strong embrace as he took care of you in your inebriated state; you find yourself missing how close he was that night on his couch and how he looked at you. 

At some point, you found yourself replaying that scene over and over again. The first few times, you were giddy with hormones as you imagined him leaning closer and kissing you. After a while, you wanted the image gone because it didn’t happen. He pulled away. He let you pick up the call from Suguru. He acted like nothing happened when in reality, a lot did happen. You two were finally breaching the line of friends and he knew that. 

So why? That question plagued your mind for days after and every time you think you forgot about it, the memory of him would remind you all over again. And when he only congratulated you when you told him about your date with Suguru you felt betrayed. Why don’t you care? You almost blurted out but technically he did care. After all, he was the one who was trying to set you guys up so why did you suddenly want to change your mind?

You think you might hate him a little for being so good at acting like everything’s normal and you think you might hate more for making your heart beat so fast. Things weren’t supposed to end up like this. You weren’t supposed to imagine your best friend kissing you breathless or taking you on a date. 

Everything’s going to fall into place, you tell yourself. You’ve already dolled up and were in the middle of spraying your perfume when Getou messaged you that he was already here. He’s relaxed in the car as you enter the car. This scene feels the same, you think to yourself, recalling the way Gojo greeted you the last time he picked you up.

“You’re wearing the shirt you wore to the party,” Getou points out and you look down at your shirt, gaping at the revelation that you’re wearing the same top Gojo told you to wear. Even with the company of another man, your subconscious still wishes he was here. 

“I didn’t even notice,” you mumble, smiling at the brown-haired male as he drives. The small talk is all natural as you two make your way to the restaurant and you’re grateful that Suguru’s such an easy person to talk with. He’s nice. Really nice and you feel almost guilty for not being as enthusiastic as you wanted to be. 

It’s only when you’re midway through the meal that he mentions it. “You’re not here.”

“What?”

“Here,” he shrugs, glancing at you with an empty smile. “You’re thinking about something else aren’t you?”

“I’m not–”

“Don’t worry I’m not mad,” he says and you know he’s telling the truth. “I’m curious. What are you thinking about?”

This makes you squirm in discomfort, a bit uneasy at how perfectly he read you. Satoru’s always made comments about Getou’s intuitive feeling for emotions and you’re starting to think he wasn’t exaggerating. “What if I don’t wanna tell you?” You joke.

“Then you’d leave me to assume,” he answers easily, the corner of his lips curling upwards. “I’m not an idiot (Name). I know when a lady’s thinking about someone else in my presence.”

When you try to protest, he only smiles. “Is it Satoru?”

Your silence is enough said. You want to deny him–want to shake your head and utter a firm “no.” But something about the question makes you lose your sense of thought and Suguru understands that too. “Are you in love with him?”

This catches your attention. “No. I like you not him.”

“Aren’t we well past the point of lying now?” He gives a good-natured chuckle. “If you liked me then you wouldn’t have looked at your phone so many times as if you were expecting a call.”

You widen your eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to–”

“Nah I’m really not mad,” he sighs. “But I’m interested in why you didn’t decline my offer for a date.”

You’re silent for a while, musing over his words. “When you called me, Satoru and I were about to kiss. Or well–at least I think we were about to kiss.

“So why’d you pick it up? I know Satoru enough to know that a call from me isn’t enough to make him stop with whatever he’s doing,” he raises a brow and you catch a roll of his eyes as he remembers something. 

“It’s because he was the one who was setting us up together.”

Suguru makes a sound of confusion, nodding at you to continue. You take a big breath. “I asked Satoru to help me get with you.”

Getou makes a “o’ with his mouth, nodding in consideration as he processes your words. His pity makes you feel small and you’re finally experiencing the impact tenfold. “Oh (Name).”

“Yeah,” you shrug. “So now I’m pretty sure I messed up the friendship because I was stupid and he’s never gonna like me back–”

“That’s not true,” he stops you, taking a sip from his wine. “Satoru’s different around you.”

“Well that’s because I’ve known him for a while now.”

“Maybe. But he doesn’t go out of his way to help people like he does with you. Even an idiot could notice that.”

“That doesn’t mean he likes me back–”

“You don’t know that yet,” he retorts, that smile of his returning again. “Just like I didn’t know you were in love with my best friend the entire time.”

You wince, swallowing as you peer up at him. You know he didn’t intend for the comment to burn but a small part of you thinks he did it on purpose. The sight of you sulking brings a wider grin to play on his face. “Relax. I’m only playing with you,” he pauses. “I’m a bit jealous that Satoru's got such a cute girl in love with him though.” 

His teasing makes you laugh. “What if he doesn’t love her back?”

“Then he’d be an idiot,” he says, giving you a look as he asks for the bill. “If he breaks your heart you know who to go to. I’d be happy to have you for myself.”

You roll your eyes, smiling softly when he coyly smiles. Suguru was kind enough to offer to drop you off at your place but you told him you wanted to see Satoru—bringing a surprised look on the brown-haired male’s face. You’re not sure how apparent it was, but you reeked of anxiety and Suguru was quick to point it out.

“I’ll wait for you,” he says nonchalantly, shooing you with his hand once you stare at him in bewilderment. “Go. Just do me a favor and message me when you guys are gonna get uh intimate.”

“We’re not—“ you click your tongue at his grin. You thank him, rushing to Satoru’s flat—the sound of your heels clicking against the floor. 

If you were in a movie, there would be dramatic music playing in the background—perhaps orchestra or a sappy love song. The scene was so cliche but you’re understanding why the protagonists always ran: it was love. You were in love with Gojo Satoru. 

You ring his doorbell, fixing your hair as you ready yourself to see him—mentally preparing the script of your confession. Please be home, please be home, please—

The door opens and a plethora of blue looks back at you, the surprise evident in them. You visibly brighten, smiling as you see him. “Satoru I—“

“Satoru?” another voice says from behind him—the voice evidently female. You freeze, feeling as if this image was in slow motion as you see a glimpse of a girl behind Satoru. Your eyes flit to both of them, the speech you prepared in your head drying up like a sore. “Who’s this?”

You hate that you can only watch. “It’s just a friend. Why don’t you go back inside for a bit, yeah?”

She’s so pretty, it hurts. There wasn’t a speck of imperfection on her and the need to curl up in a ball never felt stronger. The girl nods at Satoru, glancing at you in curiosity as she leaves you two alone. 

You think you might hate a little bit for looking at you in concern. “Is there something wrong? Are you okay? If something—“

“No. Nothing’s wrong I’m just—“ you say, wishing your voice was louder at this moment. You avoid his eyes, fearing that you’d end up crying in front of him if you continued to stare at him. “I need to go.” 

“What? But you just got here—“

“I don’t know why I came here. This was a mistake and I—“ you sigh shakily, turning on your heel to leave. 

Satoru grabs you by the wrist, his gaze soft as he shakes his head when he sees you try to pry his hand off of you. “Just tell me what I can do—“

“Suguru’s waiting for me,” you say quickly, ignoring the way his face drops. “He’s outside right now.” 

You hold your breath the moment his hand slowly slips off your wrist, taking a few steps back as you make your way outside. Not once do you turn back as you try your best to hold the tears in—ultimately failing as they fall as quickly as they appear. 

By the time you reach Suguru’s car, your make-up is already ruined. At first, he snaps his head back at you with a smile, the curve of lips quickly disappearing as he sees your lip trembling. “No?”

“No,” you confirm, sitting back into the car and wiping your tears with a tissue he hands you. There’s no words spoken between you two as he starts the car, a heavy sigh escaping his lips. Ironically, you listen to the soundtrack of “The Other Woman” playing in his car and he’s quick to change the song. He clears his throat.

“I didn’t think he was that stupid,” he says after some time, signaling right as he reaches the stop light. 

“He wasn’t,” you murmur. “I was the stupid one for thinking that we could be more than friends.”

After the ordeal a couple nights ago, you’re not even ashamed that you’re blatantly avoiding Gojo like the plague. You even turned off your read receipts for him which you would’ve found so petty if you didn’t feel so frantic at the sound of his name. Originally, you thought he’d put up more of a fight and be more persistent in getting your attention–only you were proven wrong when you didn’t see any of his attempts increasing. 

Disappointed, you were caught in a dilemma. You wanted this distance but craved his presence. At some point, your thoughts ran dry and you were in a slump. Were you always this bad at making up your mind?  

No. You weren’t. You didn’t think excessively hard when you decided you liked Getou and when you stopped liking him. Nor did you think super hard about your other crushes. Gojo made your brain hurt and if this was love, you’re not sure you really liked it; but it felt so nice to think about how it would feel to be loved by him–to have him kiss you. 

Which is why you thought it was a great idea to avoid him because surely time makes the feelings fade. And you hope they fade fast–especially after you saw him with that girl. You bite back your jealousy at the thought of what they did together. Today was supposed to be a mental health day. It was if fate allowed you to have little to nothing to do and you were going to take advantage of it. 

The coffee house was ambient with the occasional loud laughter from groups of friends. You were halfway through your book, taking a sip from your drink as you flipped the pages. This was what you were meant for: reading novels in a cafe, keeping a low profile, and protecting your peace. 

You’re about midway through the big plot twist until you hear the sound of a chair scraping and your heart freezes in your chest when you see Gojo stare back at you. Only this time, he looks serious and even annoyed. 

“I knew I’d find you here,” he begins, tapping his finger nails on the wooden table. You don’t miss the way a few people take a few double-takes when they walk past him. So much for keeping a low profile. 

“Gojo,” you acknowledge him awkwardly, fidgeting with the pages of your book.

Your stomach does a flip when his jaw twitches and his eyes cross your face. He sighs, leaning back and adjusting his seating position. “Are you mad at me?”

“Why would I be mad at you?”

“You literally just called me Gojo,” he said and if you were more rational, you would’ve laughed at how childish he sounded over you not using his first name. 

“A lot of people call you Gojo,” you point out, still not meeting his eyes. 

“You’re not just ‘a lot of people.’ And you always call me Satoru,” he murmurs. 

You tense up. There he goes again: treating you like you’re special. It makes you confused and makes your heartbeat skip. You clear your throat. “I’m not mad at you.”

“Then why are you avoiding me?” He says, a bit loudly at that. It was unlike Gojo to attract attention to personal matters in public and the guilt hits you. You were so caught up in your own feelings that you completely ignored how he would’ve felt. Even if he only thought of you as a friend, anyone would’ve felt mad if put in the situation you put Gojo in. 

You glance at the curious gazes in the cafe, grabbing him by the hand as you pull him outside to a secluded area. You quickly drop his hand, a bit surprised that he let you even hold it. “What are you talking about?” You ask, not sure why you’re playing dumb. 

“You’re avoiding me,” he says, staring down at you. Sometimes, you forget how tall Satoru really is and how his gaze can make anyone feel small. “Did I do something to make you mad?”

You think back to him and the girl. “No you didn’t do anything.”

“Then what the hell is it?” He says, sounding more mad than you initially thought. His eyes scan over your face–observing your pursed lips and aversion from his eyes. He clicks his tongue. “Is this about the other night?”

You really wish you didn’t snap your head so fast to meet his eyes. The other night could’ve meant many things but you knew he was referring to a specific one. “No,” you say and you already know he doesn’t believe you. 

“(Name),” he says softly. “Were you jealous?” Hearing him saying it out loud makes you cringe. You shake your head adamantly, trying to muster up the courage to not break eye-contact with him. You wonder if he could hear how loud your heartbeat was. “I’m not jealous. Why would I be jealous?”

“You tell me,” he voices in that tone that tells you that he’s already figured it out. For all the years you’ve known Gojo, you’ve become well-acquainted with his habits and his mannerisms. And you knew him well enough to realize that he wasn’t going to stop with the questions until you told him the truth. 

He always did this. Always made sure to pummel the truth out of you and it didn’t matter how dirty he played. “Then why did you go to me in the first place? Didn’t you have Suguru outside waiting for you?”

“I–”

“What was so important about what you wanted to tell me that you left Suguru waiting for you? What was it and why are you so scared that you’re avoiding me?”

“It’s because I like you!” You finally say, knowing that he bested you in this game of his. The regret hits you so hard you feel like running away again. Only this, he doesn’t let you when he pulls you by the shoulder. 

“What?” He says breathlessly, his eyes wide with wonder. It’s over, you think to yourself. He’s going to hate you after this because you ruined the friendship. 

“I avoided you because I like you,” you admit quietly. “And because I saw you with that girl the other night.”

“(Name)...” 

“Stop,” you murmur, feeling the tears form. “Stop. I already know what you’re gonna say, okay? It doesn’t matter anymore.”

You shrug him off, wiping your tears with your sleeve. The plans for “protecting your peace” almost seemed silly now because you couldn’t rewind time and undo all of this. You don’t bother saying goodbye to Gojo as you take your chances in leaving. And you desperately wonder how you were going to move on from this. 

Gojo thinks he’s in a fever dream. Your confession stunned him into oblivion and if it weren’t for your tears, he thinks he might’ve stayed in one spot for hours on end. The night you came over, Gojo already had enough on his mind. Seeing you in the flesh made him lose the logical side of his brain and his mind just replayed that night you two nearly kissed. 

He remembered being able to taste how nervous you were–how you found purchase on his shoulders as he tried his hardest not to pin you to the couch and kiss you stupid. He remembered how soft you were and how that thought would torture him for days on. 

Gojo knew what he did after was an asshole move but he thought the phone call from Suguru served as a reminder that he couldn’t have you. You two were best friends and to ruin that because he wanted you was selfish of him. He was already selfish enough to want to keep you for himself but you wanted Suguru. 

That’s why when you came to his place, he was confused. Gojo did something stupid and didn’t want the thoughts of you to keep popping up. He recalled dialing the number of some girl he stopped talking to ages ago just to not have you occupy his mind. 

When he saw your brows furrow at the sight of her, he was surprised to say the least. He ruled out the possibility of jealousy early on and just kept it as that. But now, on this chilly afternoon and in some secluded corner, you were confessing to him. 

You like him. You like him back. Sure, you didn’t love him like he loves you (or at least he thinks so) but that's besides the point. He collects himself the moment he sees the tears forming in your eyes, panic coursing through him. 

Did his silence make you misunderstand? Did you know that he was ready to scream and tell the whole world that he finally got the girl of his dreams? How he was prepared to pull you into a crushing hug and hold you like he had heaven in his arms? 

He forgot you weren’t a mind reader and it dawned on him that he caused your tears. He doesn’t want to be the guy who lets misunderstandings marinate nor does he want to be the cause of your fallout. He was going to fix this. 

If you thought he was going to let you go that easily then you severely underestimate him. Because Gojo Satoru was willing to fight for your love.

You think you’re in some sappy k-drama when he grabs you by the wrist the second time. If you weren’t crying your eyes out, you would’ve laughed at him and he would’ve laughed with you. But there’s only a wave of frustration when he doesn’t let go. “Satoru let me go–”

“No,” he says with a deadpan and you almost think he sounds desperate. You’re about to say something but he only steps closer. “You can’t run away like you did before. That’s the easy way out–”

“I’m not–”

“You are,” he interrupts. “And I’m not gonna let you because you’re gonna listen to what I have to say.”

You’re almost reluctant to stay silent but you give in when he squeezes your wrist–as if begging you to stay. You sigh. “Fine.”

“Good,” he whispers, racking his brain for what to say. He takes a deep breath. “A while back, I said I didn’t understand how the characters from romance movies always knew what to say in moments like these. You know those super long speeches? It seemed unrealistic to me but I think I understand now.”

You let him continue, clinging onto every word that falls from his lips. “It’s so easy to say stuff like this. When you’re in love with someone, you notice the little things about them. I noticed you and you were the only thing on my mind. You still are the only thing on my mind. Do you get what I mean?”

You watch in awe as he continues, stuttering over some of his words which was so rare for him. “The night you told me you liked Suguru I was so annoyed. I’ve never gotten jealous of Suguru or anyone but I wanted to be the one that you liked. I wanted to be the one that you dressed up for and the one you smiled at. It drove me insane when you went on a date with him and I hate that I didn’t just say fuck it and steal you away sooner.”

He takes a chance to catch his breath, ruffling his hair as he finally flashes you a crooked grin–a mix of embarrassed and boyish. “That girl you saw me with…I never did anything with her,” he admits and you think you might fall over from shock. “I couldn’t. I just kept thinking about you and I wanted you on my mind all the time. I didn’t want to think about anyone else and didn’t want anyone to take your place–”

“What I’m trying to say is that I’m in love with you,” he finally says. “I already said that earlier but I want to say it again. I think I’ve always loved you–even when we were kids. I think little kid me always wanted your attention. I just never knew what I felt until I realized that you weren’t mine–not mine to love. And I don’t think there’s nothing in the world that I want more than you.”

At this point, your mouth is already ready to catch flies as you listen to his ramblings about his affections. You think you might cry. Gojo’s usually not good with words but you can tell how genuine he is–how much he meant this. “Then all those times you helped me with Suguru?”

“I hated doing that,” he huffs. “I swear I was about to punch Suguru every time he called you cute.”

You laugh, feeling jittery all over. “Would you?”

“I’m a bit worried that you like that idea a bit too much.”

You grin, shrugging. “Maybe a little. I guess I should tell you that I really wanted you to kiss me when we were on the couch.”

“You did?” He practically beams, cupping your face with his hand. You feel your stomach do twists when his thumb grazes the skin of your cheek softly, as if this was always normal. 

“And I should probably tell you that I love you too,” you say firmly, gaining a rush of confidence. “And you should probably kiss me right now.”

The smile on his face might just be the prettiest thing you’ve seen in the world. He leans in, cupping your face as he presses his lips against yours. The way he holds you makes you feel safe and you think you might love him a little more when he moves his hand to your neck. 

You break the kiss. “Does this mean we’re dating now?”

He laughs. “Do I need to kiss you again for you to say yes?” 

When you nod, he pulls you in again and again. And if this was his way of asking, you’d say yes each time. 

[urhoneycombwitch]

eddie x latebloomer, virgin reader (so not self-projecting...) who isn't innocent or typically what people say is "virginal" (because virginity is a construct!) but still gets super nervous about heavy petting/sex because they've never done it before and don't want to be bad or weird and literally just flees at the confrontation

until that ovulation hits and r! is trying so hard to ignore it, squirming on Eddie's couch/bed and he's like 🤨 you ok? and then it just comes out in a whole word vomit that he's super hot and they're absolutely soaked but don't know what to do and it probably won't be good and they should just go home and eddies like... no big deal, I'll just eat you out, no penetration 🤷🏻

and when they do actually have sex later, I know Eddie talks R through it

ty for suggesting this anon! u got me inspired here's a lil blurb. also dedicated to @wdsara48 who asked for more inexperienced!reader content 🫡

+18 mdni: Eddie’s a bit clueless about the hormone cycle, oral (r receiving), cumming in pants (guess who), ovulation horny (™)

____________

On second thought, it was probably a really bad call to visit your boyfriend when you were this horny.

Which sounds silly, you know it does- who wouldn't want to visit their hot boyfriend at a time like this?- but you've really been enjoying taking it slow this time around. Eddie is the first boy you've dated who has totally and completely earned your trust when it comes to sex- he's never once pressured you to take your heated make-out sessions any further, pulling back and unwinding himself from you with spit-slick lips every so often to gauge your comfort level.

Is this okay? How are you feeling? Wanna take a break?

So kind. So considerate. So far away, in the kitchen, humming to himself while he fixes dinner, hair loose and curling around the shoulders of his tight Metallica tee. Every time he reaches over to stir the pot of chili on the stove, the lean muscles in his upper back and biceps curl and flex.

Hormones are flushing hot through your body, the couch you’re seated on feeling more and more confining by the second; you cross your legs at the ankle in an attempt to stave off the fidgeting, but when this causes the thick denim of your zippered jeans to press into the ache between your legs you are quick to uncross them again.

There’s a low-toned buzz that’s taken up residence in your hearing, like all the raging horniness has no place else to go- which is why you don’t hear Eddie the first time he speaks.

He’s standing at the edge of the living room now, hands on hips, one dark brow raised in your direction- “Earth to angel. You with me?”

“Huh?” You swallow harshly against the dryness in your throat (contrasted with the excess wetness in other places) and shake your head, slipping your hands underneath your thighs to sit on them and ground yourself a bit. “Sorry, I was zoning out. What’d you say?”

“I said you seem antsy tonight,” Eddie repeats, moving in to sit next to you, close enough for your knees to touch. “Had too much coffee or somethin’? Y’know, you really shouldn’t drink that stuff after noon. Not good for ya.”

He’s teasing, all smooth movements with an easy grin as he snakes an arm around your shoulders.

The smoke-sweet smell of his cologne floods your senses- musky and heady and this underlayer of something earthy, wild, that you could swear hits on a primal nerve by the way it makes your clit throb.

When you stiffen under Eddie’s arm, he reads your signal as one of discomfort, tsking at himself underneath his breath before starting to pull away. “Sorry, sweetheart, didn’t mean to make you-”

“No!” Your hand darts out to grab at his over your shoulder, keeping him from leaving, because if the warmth of his body pressed to your side stops you might actually die. “No, it’s not you. I promise. It’s me. I’m…”

Eddie watches you with mild concern as you flounder, mouth opening and shutting a few times before settling on just the truth- “I’m ovulating.”

He blinks. “Um. Shit. Do you need to go to the doctor? ‘Cuz the main office is definitely closed this time ‘a night but the ER is for sure open-”

You bend at the waist, pitching forward with a groan and cutting him off. With hot cheeks buried in your hands, your voice comes out muffled- “Didn’t you take sex ed, like, three times?”

“Sure did. Learned basic anatomy real well.” His palm has slid to your lower back, your shirt ridden up to expose a stripe of skin that his warm hand now rests on. “Help me out, princess. What’s goin’ on?”

With a pounding heart, you manage to sit up, looking down at your hands in your lap as you whisper, “Ovulation makes me, like, super horny.”

At first, you think he didn’t hear you, but after a beat of silence there’s a subtle shift in his posture, spine straightening.

“Oh.” Eddie’s hand on you doesn’t move but his other one smoothes down the line of his jean-clad thigh, clearing his throat before asking, “And do you wanna… do something about that?”

Mustering courage, you swivel slightly to look at him- the joking tone from earlier has drained out of his voice, and this is the shyest you’ve ever seen him: staring unseeing at his own lap, plucking at the knee of his jeans.

“Like what?” You ask, matching the same low tone he’s just used.

When Eddie looks back at you, that’s when you realize your mistake- his lack of eye contact wasn’t due to shyness. The way he’s looking at you now, dark chocolate eyes holding a steady gaze, it’s a wonder he’s been so restrained this whole time. 

“Could eat you out. Only if you wanted, though.”

You shiver. Visibly. 

A slow, half-tilted smile pulls at Eddie’s lips; he brings your free hand to his face and kisses your knuckles, then tugs you up with him to stand.

“C’mon. Let’s go to the bedroom.”

Cast in soft lamplight, Eddie closes the door to his room before cupping your face in his hands, cool rings against your cheeks. He kisses you gently, at first, plush lips notching in steady rhythm against yours; when you tug him in closer by his waist and slip your tongue between his teeth, he groans into your mouth.

He pulls away, wet click of your separating mouths loud in the quiet of the room before giving your hip a light tap. “Up on the bed, angel.”

You’re quick to comply, crawling backwards on the duvet, lust unfurling in your stomach as you rest half-propped on your elbows.

Eddie divests himself of his shirt in one fluid motion without taking his eyes from you. His pale skin gleams in the low light, silver chain and guitar pick necklace swinging as he moves to hover over you.

“You okay?” He asks, dark hair a curtain around both your faces as his bare torso presses against your clothed one. 

When you nod, he ducks to kiss you again before sliding a hand up your shirt. “Good. ‘Cuz I don’t think I could stop even if I wanted to.”

You know he’s mostly joking- you and him have a safeword, and he’s always attentive to your body signals- but the pure desire that he’s kissing and touching you with is indicative of a boy who’s waited too long to be able to have you like this.

Eddie laps at your mouth, tongue twining with yours as his hand squeezes and molds the fat of your breast through your bra as both your nipples stiffen in response. When his knee slots between your thighs, you moan, hips jolting up to chase the friction.

“Can I…” you’re panting, forehead crushed to Eddie’s as you search for the words. “I want your mouth, on me- please.”

You’re rarely ever so communicative, usually hidden away behind a wall of reservations that are totally melted away now. Eddie makes a noise like he’s been punched, sucks at a spot behind your ear that causes your hips to rock forward again, then says, “Yeah, sweetheart, yeah. You can have my mouth. Fuck.”

While he kisses down the slope of your neck, between your clothed breasts, your bare stomach where your shirt’s been rucked up, he’s muttering (to himself, to you, hard to say): “‘Course you can have my mouth. Have it wherever you want it. Christ. Should’a asked for it sooner. Give you anything you want.”

Eddie pops the button on your jeans and you lift your hips so he can pull them completely off your body; when he sees the wet patch of arousal darkening your baby blue underwear he chokes out another curse before working the fabric down your hips and tossing them to the ground.

“Gonna let me taste you, baby?” he asks, stretching his lower half out on the mattress and pulling your legs over his shoulders, his mouth inches from your soaked core. Eddie looks up at you, face bracketed by your thighs, pupils blown out with desire, waiting for your go-ahead.

“Please,” you murmur, stretching out a hand to pet at the crown of his head.

His eyes flutter shut for a moment with your touch; when he presses a kiss to the top of your cunt, your hand tightens in his hair, his resulting hum of encouragement vibrating against your clit.

Eddie flattens his tongue and licks a wide stripe up your folds, spreading the wetness from your leaking hole up to mouth sloppily at your clit; when he sucks the bundle of nerves into his mouth, your elbow supporting your half-propped frame gives out and you pitch back against the covers.

“There- ah- shit, there, Eddie…” you sound wrecked already, voice husked with the strain of holding back whines. Normally, you’d be so in your head about the exposing condition you’re in, but at this point you’re too wound up to care, Eddie’s tongue against the beating heart of you coaxing that tightness in your stomach closer and closer to snapping.

His nails bite in where his hands span the width of your thighs, holding you against his mouth even as your legs tremble and hips twist jerkily with each sweep of his tongue; Eddie gives one last suck to your clit then follows the line of your cunt down, down with his tongue to prod at your sodden entrance.

When his tongue slides into you with a wet squelch, obscenely loud in the otherwise quiet room, you both moan in tandem- your hand in his hair tightens to near-brutal, and the bed underneath you both tremors with the jolt of Eddie’s hips rutting into the mattress.

He sets a steady pace with his tongue, fucking it in and out of you as his nose nudges against your clit. That coil in your stomach is starting to make all your muscles tense up, your thighs locking Eddie in place (who seems to only be spurred on with each constriction of your body).

“Gonna come?” The lower half of his face is coated in your slick as he takes a brief pause to kiss at your inner thigh, one hand coming to rest on your tummy, pinning you down. “C’mon, baby. Let me see it.”

Your body obeys, tension snapping as his mouth returns to your cunt, a high whine of “Eddie Eddie Eddie” that you don’t bother to hide this time loosening from your throat as everything around you bursts and crashes into orgasm.

Toes curling against Eddie’s lower back, cunt spasming around his tongue, Eddie fucks you through it and then some, his own hips mindlessly grinding down as your release triggers his own, spilling warm into his boxers while your high spirals out.

When the spams of your pleasure turn over into aftershocks, Eddie comes up for air, pressing one last kiss to your overstimulated cunt before crawling up your body to lie on top with his head in the crook of your neck.

“Fuck,” you say aloud to the ceiling, breathless, arms automatically encircling the boy. “Holy shit.”

“I’ll say.” Eddie’s breath cools over the sticky patch he kissed into your skin, his mouth still wet with your release. He gathers enough energy to plant his elbows on either side of your head, looking down at you, suddenly serious. “So um… how often do you get ovi- ovel… like this? Once a year or somethin’?”

The laugh shakes out of your chest before you can stop it; you reach up to tuck Eddie’s curls behind his ears, your previous bashfulness having been tongue-fucked out of you.

“Eddie Munson, do I have news for you.”

[chocum]

yea tattoo artist choso but .. what abt tattoo artist geto

congrats on 1k btw!

eee thank youuuu 🙈🙈 i’m souuurrr happy you requested geto bc i’ve been wanting to write abt other characters. AND THISS got out of hand lollll ( 1.5k ) idk what came over me i just word vomited all over my phone… & it’s unedited

— tattooartist!geto x reader // mentions of smoking, m masterbation, fleshlight, cum eating, kinda pervy geto idk he tells reader to take her shirt off when she doesn’t need to so, nipple play, v in p, mentions of overstim, creampiee

suguru geto is one of the most, if not the most popular tattoo artists in your area— hell, probably even farther than that. just to book an appointment, there’s a waitlist not including the months and months he’s already booked for. so when you finally get that confirmation email after waiting for what felt like years, you physically jump up, rushing to get ready and go to the parlor

“i don’t have anyone today under that name, sorry”

suguru pushes a strand of silk black hair behind his pierced ears, the dragon tattoo on his hand moving as he does so almost like it’s taunting you.

“what? i got an email today i just-” your hand reaches into your purse slacked over your shoulder to pull out your phone and prove your appointment was today, but when you go back to check, heat spreads across your cheeks faster than ever.

the date said next month

“ya had the right day i’ll give you that” and he’s laughing. not at you but because you’re cute, he thinks. pouting, growing hot from embarrassment. “i’ll tell you what..”

he leans in and you can smell the smoke that lingers on his breath mixing like some sort of love potion with his musky cologne, his pierced eyebrow quirking, browned eyes staring into yours with puffy lips wet from licking, “i can squeeze you in tomorrow. was supposed to have an off day but ill help a pretty girl like you out, how’s that sound?”

and you’ve never nodded faster. smile pulling at your glossed lips, drawing his to get trapped underneath his teeth.

“here i’ll give you my number, i’ll text you the time ‘n stuff later”

with that, you leave his parlor, your number scribbled on the back of some old receipt next to your name and a heart.

geto’s no better than a man. no better. he goes home that night and texts you as soon as he’s tucked into bed.

hey this is suguru btw.

your phone vibrates on your nightstand, and you smile at the notification. it almost felt unreal, someone who felt so unreachable, someone like geto in your phone, texting you first.

hey!

he catches himself smiling at the message too, his mind trailing back to seeing your pretty face when you walked into the parlor. the way you looked around doe-eyed like a little deer in headlights. looked innocent, and he liked that. maybe a little too much, his dick twitching against the fabric of his boxers.

he only talked to you for a few minutes. barely even held a conversation, but god did you look good. can’t blame him for getting like this.

what time is good for you? like i said, im supposed to be off but had no plans so any time is fine.

your thumbs dance across your keyboard as you think of what to say in response. you’re nervous. and if you knew he was jerking his cock, you’d be even more. his hand slowly .. very slowly rubbing his leaky tip, his head full, overflowing and bubbling with thoughts of you. what are you doing right now? are you in bed too? squeezing his warm balls, cupping them, teasing himself, imagining it’s your sweet little hands.

is 6 pm okay?

the little buzz drags him from his thoughts.

yea. see you then, pretty.

the simple little pet name makes you feel like you’re going to explode. so warm all over your body, and you wish you could just time travel to the next day and see him already.

geto brings the palm of his large hand to his face, lolling his tongue out to lick long stripes on it, shivering at the feeling of his own piercing before wrapping around the base of his thick cock, stroking himself only two times. this won’t do.

he reached for the pocket pussy he keeps nested deep in his drawer. leaning over to let spit fall and dribble into the clear toy before rubbing it on his tip.

groaning, “shiiiiittt” his hips bucking up as he slowly lets it sink down— body twitching at the feeling of all the little bumps and ridges massaging his sensitive cock.

“fu- fuck juuuust like that, mhhhm”

imagining he’s inside your tight little walls, squishing him like he’s meant for you, snug and tight like a puzzle piece.

his chest heaved with every snap of his wrist, spit sinking out and ringing out the base of his cock leaking down to his heavy balls, “feel so fucking good baby”

so fast he’s already shooting into the toy, whining because it’s not you. wishing it was you, your warm walls probably feel so much better. probably sound so cute taking him from behind or from the front, your eyes locked onto his.

he came so much it’s leaking all over himself. so messy and dirty and he brings the toy up and licks it all out, shoving his tongue inside the rubbery walls to flick and clean it up.

“shit”

the next day came too slowly. to you but especially to suguru. he went to the parlor an hour earlier to open and tidy up, pulling his raven locs into a ponytail, letting a few stray strands fall and frame his face, counting each and every second.

and then he hears it. the little ding as the door opens, you push it open smiling up at him as you walk through and you look even better than he remembered. and he’s trying so hard to keep his composure.

he nods at you, giving you a small smile, “so what did you want to get, and where?”

at your reply he freezes, his hands almost crumbling up the paperwork he reached for you to fill out — “my chest”

“your chest?”

he parrots you. then he repeats it in his head a few more times. picturing you pull your little top up.

he can tell you’re not wearing a bra with how your nipples perk up and poke through the flimsy, almost see-through fabric.

you nod your head, mhm sounding and bubbling past your lips.

god, you’re going to be the death of him.

after you finish with all the paperwork, he pulls you into the back making small talk asking about your day. and you indulge, asking back, finding comfort in the normality of your conversation. he’s different from what people painted him out to be and you felt relaxed in his presence.

even more when he offers you a seat, cleaning it off before slipping on some black gloves. his hands almost bulge out, his knuckles poking through the latex.

“can i see the design?”

you pull up the picture on your phone and he hums, “and you said your chest, right?”

again he repeats it, almost as if it’s a mantra he’s using to calm his nerves. calm his dick.

you just nod, “do i need to take my shirt off?”

and well no you don’t, not yet at least, but he says yes, reaching forward to do it for you because he’s just so sweet, right? so nice and caring, and welcoming.

and he only wraps his lips around your tits to soothe you, right? sucking, letting his teeth sink into the buds, the silver ball tracing over them. his other glove-clad hand cupping them.

sinks his cock into you just cause he wants to take care of you, right? he could tell you wanted it soo bad. your thighs pressing together so tightly when he pressed his lips against your chest with a soft, “suguru please”

“mhm let me take care of you, pretty girl, spread em, hold yourself open f’me— uh huh, juuust like that.”

your little arms shake and tremble, hooking around the back of your knees as he pushes into your tight cunt. and fuck, he was right. feels so much better than his toy.

“fuuuckk found your spot, baby, ‘s right there? yeah feel good right there?” he rolls his hips up, brushing against that spot, his thick tip kissing it, making your body twitch.

“yes— fuck yes feels so good”

right about you sounding so fucking good too— his cock twitching inside the solitude of your pretty slimy walls. shivering at how you suck and milk him so well, so tight and warm. so fucking warm. feels so good he’s already close, but he wants to keep making you feel good, keep hearing you, and if he was to fuck his cum into you, overstimulating his needy cock to do that, then so be it.

“inside” you whine out at how he twitches, his stokes sputtering and faltering as he languidly pushing into your sopping pussy, leaking all over him, so wet.

“ohh — fuck ohfuck” and it pushes him over the edge, bottoming out to overfill you, make you nice and creamy ‘cause you deserve it. deserve it for being so good, making him feel so good.

letting his head fall onto your shoulder sweat sprinkling his forehead as he empties himself for you. for your pretty pussy, all for you.

[hoe-for-hopper]

A Crush On Eddie

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Part 2 is HERE

WARNINGS: kind of a slow burn, unprotected piv, masturbation (f & m), drinking (reader is drunk, not during sex), vomiting (reader vomits)

Word Count: 4,983 (idk how that happened)

Summary: You've got a crush on Eddie Munson, so you drag your two best friends, Steve and Robin to Corroded Coffin's show. When Steve is too drunk to drive you home, Eddie offers.

A/N: I swear this was supposed to just be a one and done Eddie fic, but oops I got carried away and there's gonna be a part 2 (steddie) sometime in the next few days. Partially unedited, ends on a cliffhanger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~SMUT BELOW THE CUT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You, Steve, and Robin pull up to the shitty little dive bar that Corroded Coffin is playing tonight. You’re nervous, but you’re not sure why. It’s not like Eddie is even going to notice you. You’re just here to enjoy the show and have a fun night out with your best friends. Besides, you haven’t seen Eddie since you were all in high school and you hardly spoke with him then. He probably doesn’t even remember who you are.

Steve has no clue about your little crush on Eddie Munson. He has no idea that he’s the only reason you dragged them to the Corroded Coffin show. Robin, on the other hand, has been forced to listen to your lust filled rants about Eddie on more than one occasion. 

“Alright, I’ll grab the drinks, you guys go find us a good clean spot to watch them.” Steve shook his head as he made his way to the bar at the back of the room. 

You and Robin found a small table against the wall to the side of the stage. As you two placed your purses and jackets down you looked up and saw Eddie walking towards the bar and your heart skips a beat. He was cute, more than cute, really. 

“Oh God. Why don’t you just go talk to him? It’s not like you two don’t already know each other.” Robin is rolling her eyes as she follows your line of sight to Eddie.

“Because. What would I even say? ‘Hi Eddie, remember how we hardly talked during high school and weren’t even friends? Well, I’ve actually got such a huge crush on you that I dragged my two best friends to your show tonight.’ I mean, come on, Robin.” You let out a heavy sigh and sit down on the stool.

Robin finishes draping her jacket over her chair and sits down, “Well, maybe don’t say that. I was more so thinking of something along the lines of ‘hi.’ You know, something normal.” 

“What are we talking about?” Steve says as he sets down the drinks. 

You catch Robin’s eye and give your head a subtle shake. “Oh, we were just saying how I think that girl over there at the bar is so cute. Y/N was saying I should go talk to her, but I’m just way too nervous.” Robin winks at you as Steve cranes his neck trying to see what girl she’s talking about.

“I didn’t see a cute girl at the bar.” Steve says.

“Oh she must have left already. Anyway thanks for the drinks, I think they’re about to start soon.” Robin spins around to face the stage while Steve is still scoping out the venue for girls.

As all three of you sip your beers and continue talking, the lights dim and Eddie walks onto the stage. You’ve got butterflies already. Robin turns back to look at you, she’s got a knowing smirk on her face. You roll your eyes and take another swig of your drink.

After the first few songs, you start to loosen up a little bit. Steve has gotten you your second beer and you’re almost ready for your third. You really weren’t planning to drink a lot tonight, but you have been wanting to talk to Eddie and you figured the alcohol would make it a little easier.

The next time Steve goes to the bar, Robin pulls you towards the front of the stage. “Robin, what are you doing?” 

“Trying to help you get a closer look at your future boyfriend.” Robin is giggling so hard that a few drops of her beer splash over the rim of the bottle. 

“Please.” You’re rolling your eyes again, but you’re definitely enjoying the close up view of Eddie. You rake your eyes over him and you can’t help but linger on the spot right below his belt buckle. 

“I see you guys are getting in on the action!” Steve comes up behind you and hands you and Robin another beer. “I’m gonna go hang at our table. I’m trying to get this girl’s number, told her to meet me over there.” He walks off towards your table.

You turn back around to face the stage, and notice Eddie is looking right at you. Eddie Munson is looking at you. Your breath catches in your throat as he looks away towards the other side of the crowd. 

Robin nudges you and says “Oh my god! He totally just looked right at you!”

You punch her arm and laugh, but a tingly feeling flows throughout your body. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After Corroded Coffin’s set, you and Robin head back to your table to find Steve deep in conversation with a girl that Robin apparently knows. 

“Well, I’ve got to run to the bathroom, I’ll be right back you guys.” You head to the bathroom in the back corner of the venue. 

You fix your hair in the mirror before walking back outside. As you make your way back to the table, an arm reaches out in front of you to stop you. 

“Hey, didn’t we go to high school together?” It’s Eddie. He drops his arm and steps in front of you. 

“Wow, you scared me. Uh yeah, we did.” Your voice is a little shaky. You can’t believe Eddie is talking to you. You knew it was probably no big deal. It’s not like he was actually famous or anything. His band played at a few dive bars around town and that was really it. 

“I’m glad you came out to the show. Did you have fun? I gotta say, I didn’t think this would be your scene. From what I remember, in high school you were in a different crowd.” He’s smiling down at you. 

You look past him to see Robin staring at you with her eyebrows raised. Steve is also staring at you, the girl he was previously talking to had left. You raise your eyebrows back before turning to look up at Eddie. “Yeah, I remembered you had the band in high school and saw you guys were playing tonight. I thought we’d come check you out.” 

Eddie looks over his shoulder and you see Robin and Steve quickly glance away. “I see you’re still friends with Steve Harrington.” He says his name with an annoyance in his voice. Eddie and Steve didn’t exactly get along in school and it seems like Eddie hasn’t forgotten that. 

You chuckle nervously, “Yep. We’re still friends. So, the show was good. You were really great up there.”

“Thanks. That means a lot. I’m glad you had fun. I’ll let you get back to your friends. Maybe I’ll see you around some other time? We’re playing here again next weekend.” 

“Maybe we’ll come watch you guys again.” As you walk back towards Steve and Robin, you try not to overthink too much about your conversation with Eddie.

“Didn’t know you were friends with The Freak.” Steve is saying as you all start gathering your things.

“Oh shut up, Steve. We’re not in high school anymore. Can you at least try to act like an adult?” Robin elbows Steve in his side earning a little “ow” from him.

As you all walk to Steve’s car, you’re telling them about Eddie’s band playing here again next weekend. It takes some convincing from you and Robin, but Steve offers to drive again next weekend.

“Do you like him or something?” Steve is asking you as he drops you and Robin off at your apartment.

You roll your eyes at Steve and say, “No, I just think it would be fun. And maybe next time you’ll have a little more luck getting some numbers.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Steve says before he drives off leaving you and Robin giggling at the door.

You and Robin spend the night overanalyzing the conversation you had with Eddie. Or rather, Robin spends the night listening to you ramble on and theorize your outfit for next weekend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time the next weekend rolls around, you’ve spent countless hours going over how you’re going to talk to Eddie again. You’re still too nervous to approach him first, but you know you can’t leave the show without speaking to him. 

You hear Steve honk his horn outside and you make your way out front with Robin trailing behind you. Robin had been helping you get ready and listening to you freak out over what you should say to Eddie tonight.

“You girls ready to go? I hope this time is better than the last time.” Steve puts the car in drive and heads toward the bar.

Robin snorts and says, “Steve, you can’t base the fun you have on how many girls’ numbers you get. There’s more to life than girls.”

“Yeah, you’re one to talk.”

When you arrive at the bar, Steve grabs your drinks again and you and Robin head to the same table as last time. Robin nudges you, “Look who’s over there.” She’s smiling and you follow her gaze to the side of the stage where Eddie stands holding a guitar case and surveying the bar. 

When he spots where you and Robin are sitting he walks up to you. “Hi guys. Excited for the show?” 

You’re too nervous to speak, luckily Robin chimes in with, ���Oh yeah. You guys were great last time.”

Eddie turns to look at you. You notice how handsome he is when his smile stretches all the way to his eyes. “Yeah, I’m sure it’ll be a lot of fun.” 

Just then, Steve returns and sets the beers down on the table. “Hey man, how’s it going?”

Eddie just gives him a little nod and says, “I gotta get up there, but I’ll catch you guys after the show.” When he says it, he’s just looking at you. You feel a tingling go through your body. You feel electric and you can almost feel the blush creeping up your face.

Steve stares after Eddie before turning back around to say, “Jeeze. What’s his problem?”

Throughout the show, you catch Eddie’s eyes a few times. Of course, Robin immediately notices and nudges you each time. When it’s Steve’s turn to grab the drinks, Robin is asking you if you’re actually going to make a move on Eddie tonight. 

“I have no idea. I mean, I want to, definitely. It’s just, I don’t know, we’re total opposites.” You gulp down the last of your beer. Robin assures you that Eddie would be interested just as Steve reappears with the drinks. You notice he’s swaying a little bit as he sets them down and you’re worried he won’t be able to drive home.

Corroded Coffin finishes their set and starts packing up, but Eddie breaks away and heads straight to your table. You stand up to greet him and that’s when you realize just how drunk you actually are. How many beers had you had? At least four, maybe even five? “Hi Eddie.”

“Hey. Like the show?” He’s still only looking at you and you’re not sure if it’s because he has something against Steve and doesn’t know Robin all that well or because he wants to look only at you.

“Yeah it was really great!” You’re excited and slurring your words.

All four of you talk for a few minutes longer before Eddie excuses himself to help the band finish packing up their equipment. 

Eddie is only gone for a few minutes when he returns just as you’re all gathering your things and getting ready to leave. Steve stumbles as he stands and he grabs the table for support. Eddie sees this and says “Hey man, you all right? If you’re not good to drive I can drop you all off.” Eddie offers.

Steves starts to protest saying that you’re all going to different places, but Eddie cuts in with, “Really, it’s no problem. I’ve got the van, you guys can just pile in the back.”

Robin and Steve turn to face you and your eyes are wide. Eddie Munson driving you home after his show? Of course, he’s also driving Robin and Steve home. And it’s because you’re all too drunk to safely get home. It’s nothing exciting. “Yeah, yeah. That would be really great, thank you, Eddie.”

Eddie leads the three of you out to his van. He offers you the front seat which you happily accept and the other two climb in the back. 

You can hear Steve and Robin giggling in the backseat. You’re hoping Robin isn’t drunk enough to spill your secret longing for Eddie. You know this is just a little crush and you’ll get over it. 

You give Eddie directions to Steve’s then to Robin’s house. Eddie pulls up in front of Robin’s and you get out to walk her to her door. “This is your chance, Y/N. You better go for it.” You whisper at her to shut up as she slips inside. 

Not much is said on the way to your apartment, but you’re filled with an electric buzz throughout your body. You’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or the fact that you’re sitting next to Eddie.

“Thanks so much for the ride. I really appreciate it.” You say as you start gathering your things. Eddie responds that he’s glad to give you a ride. You’re not looking at him, but it sounds like he’s smirking and you blush at where your mind goes. 

You try to get out of the van, but you can’t seem to grasp hold of the door handle without dropping all your things. You laugh as you realize the alcohol is catching up to you. 

“Okay, hang on, sweetheart.” Eddie notices you struggling, gets out of the van, and walks around to the passenger side. He opens the door for you to help you out. “Let me walk you in, I’ll carry your things.”

You hand over your things in silence as you process that Eddie just called you sweetheart. You watch as Eddie fiddles with your keys before finding the one to unlock the door. “Ladies first.” He has one hand on your elbow and the other is pushing the door closed behind you. 

As he sets your stuff down on the entry table you catch yourself saying, “Do you want to stay? I mean, just have a cup of coffee or something? Unless you’re tired. I know it’s late.” 

Eddie says that he would love to, so you head to the kitchen and start preparing a pot of coffee. When you turn back around, you’re hit with an overwhelming sensation in your stomach. You’re going to vomit now. There’s no way you can make it to the bathroom so you  lean over the sink and heave. 

The next thing you know, Eddie is there behind you. He’s taking out the hair tie that had been holding his long hair in a loose bun and pulls your hair away from your face to tie it back. You’ve never been more embarrassed in your life. You’re vomiting in your kitchen sink in front of Eddie Munson who is currently rubbing small circles between your shoulder blades. Through your noises you can hear him saying, “It’s alright. I’ve got you.” Despite your current situation, a rush of heat shoots down to your core. 

Eddie helps you to your bed, leaving to grab a glass of water. When he returns, you’ve slipped under the blankets and are almost asleep. “There’s a glass of water on your nightstand. Call me in the morning and I’ll take you to get the car.” He says before turning to leave.

“Wait. You can stay here, it’s late.” You call out to him from your half asleep state.

Eddie stands in the doorway, debating on what to do. Part of him wants to leave to not make things awkward for the both of you in the morning. He’s not sure if you mean he can sleep on your couch or your bed. 

As if reading his mind, you tap on the bed and roll over sleepily. He doesn’t need any more insistence and takes his jacket off before tossing it on the ground and crawling into bed next to you. He leans up to look at you and realizing you’ve already fallen asleep, he lays back down. As he does, he catches  a glimpse of lacy black underneath your skirt that’s crept up your thighs. 

Eddie is completely still on his back next to you. He’s never told you this, but he had a huge crush on you in high school. He was more than surprised when he’d noticed you while he was on stage last weekend. During the entire set, he had been thinking of ways to talk to you before you left. He was a little disappointed when he realized you were friends with Steve and he’d been hoping Steve wasn’t going to talk you out of coming to the next show. 

When he’d seen you again tonight, he couldn’t wait to talk to you. He’d been hanging out at the side of the stage, waiting for you to walk in. He spent the entire show trying not to stare at you the whole time. He felt like he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. He loved the way your short skirt flowed around your thighs. 

Eddie felt you shift, as he looked over he saw that you had kicked off your half of the blanket. With your skirt almost completely up your thighs, he had a perfect view of the lacy black underwear you were wearing. He felt the bulge in his pants grow. 

He knew it wasn’t right to stare, but he couldn’t help it. As quietly as he could, he undid his belt buckle and unzipped his jeans. Slowly, he pulled his pants down just enough to free his hardened cock. 

As Eddie began stroking himself, he imagined what your hand would feel like wrapped around him. He thought about you staring into his eyes as your hand went up and down. He wondered what you would taste like.

Eddie continued to pump his hand up and down while alternating between staring at your ass and imaging all the things he could do to you. He lifted his shirt just as he spilled onto his stomach. Carefully, he got out of bed and made his way to your bathroom to clean up.

When he returned, he draped the blanket back over you and laid down next to you. He wasn’t sure how he was going to fall asleep with the knowledge that he’d just finished himself off a few inches away from you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, you’re awoken to the sound of a voice coming from your kitchen. It takes you a second to remember that Eddie Munson spent the night.

“Oh, you know what, here she comes now.” Eddie hands you the phone as you walk sleepily into the kitchen. You see he’s already made a pot of coffee and is now cooking breakfast.

You know it’s Robin before you put the phone to your ear, you can already hear her voice. “Y/N, was that who I think it is that answered your phone? Was he there all night? What happened!”

“Yes and yes. I’ll call you later okay?” You hung up before Robin could say anything else. “Hey, thanks for the coffee. You really didn’t have to make breakfast though.” 

“After what you did last night, I figured you’d need some energy this morning. Don’t worry about it.” 

You’re shaking and it’s not from the alcohol last night. You’re still trying to piece together what happened. After what I did? What did I do? And then it all comes rushing back to you. You vomited in your kitchen sink right in front of Eddie Munson. And then you invited him to bed. And he accepted the offer. 

Eddie sets a plate down in front of you and leans against the wall sipping his coffee. “I figure we can pick Steve up, take him to get his car. And then…” He pauses, unsure if he should say what he’s thinking. You raise your eyebrows and he continues, “And then I was thinking later tonight, you might want to grab dinner? With me, of course.” 

You almost choke. Is Eddie asking you out on a date or are you reading way too much into things? “Yeah, yeah sounds good.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eddie drops you back off at your apartment after taking Steve to pick up his car. As soon as you’re through the door, you’re calling Robin. “Robin, oh my god.” You gave her a recap of exactly what happened the previous night - vomiting included. 

“You threw up in your kitchen sink and he still slept in the same bed as you. Wow.” Robin is laughing hysterically. “Steve, did you hear that? She threw up!”

“STEVE is there? Oh god, Robin I don’t want more people knowing about this. It’s embarrassing enough that I have to know.” You groan and slide down the kitchen wall to the tile. 

Steve has grabbed the phone from Robin. “Are you dating Eddie now? Because if that freak can get a date easier than I can, I swear…”

“Shut up. No, we’re not dating. Nothing even happened. Sure, we slept in the same bed, but that’s it. Okay?” Even as you’re saying it, you still can’t believe it happened. You tell Steve and Robin bye before you hang up and start getting ready for your date with Eddie.

As you’re in the shower, you think of all the things that could have happened had you not passed out. Your hand slips down to your folds as you slide your fingers around in small circles. You’re imagining it’s Eddie’s hands touching you. As you climax, you’re imagining Eddie’s fingers pumping in and out of you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re just finishing getting dressed as you hear a knock on your door. “Come in! I’ll just be a minute!” After trying on almost everything you own and calling Robin countless times for advice, you’d settled on a short flowy black dress.

When you emerge from your room, Eddie is sitting on the couch. As he looks up at you his eyes go wide and all of a sudden you feel self conscious. You look down at yourself and smooth your hands down your dress. “You look…incredible.” Eddie finally manages to choke out.

You smile at him and he almost melts. He rakes his eyes over you and without meaning to actually do it, he licks his lips. “You ready to go?” He stands up and grabs your hand, leading out to his van.

You feel an electric buzz that flows throughout your body, centered on where your hands meet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You can hardly remember dinner as Eddie opens the passenger door to his van, helping you inside. You spent the entire time trying to think of ways to invite Eddie back to your apartment after dinner. You also spent quite a bit of time staring at his hands and imagining what they could do to you. So by the time you’re settled inside the van, your core is already pulsing with need. 

When Eddie arrives at your apartment, you’re surprised when he gets out of the van to follow you inside. “I thought we could hang for a little longer? I’ve been really enjoying talking to you.” He says shyly as you set your things down. 

The two of you sit on the couch and continue the conversation you’d been having about Steve. “He’s really not so bad once you get to know him, I promise.” You’d been trying to convince Eddie that Steve was actually a great friend.

“Well, I’ll believe that when I see it.” Eddie shrugs his shoulders.

Neither of you have mentioned the previous night. You know it’s probably not a big deal, nothing happened and Eddie was just taking care of you after you’d drank too much. 

“Want a beer?” Eddie nods his head ‘yes’ so you head to the kitchen to grab two beers from the fridge. 

When you return to the living room and hand Eddie the beer, your hands brush and neither of you pull away. When you sit down next to him, Eddie leans forward to set his beer on the coffee table. He turns to look at you, “You know, you really do look incredible. Thanks for going out with me tonight.”

You can feel a blush creeping up your cheeks as you set your beer down next to his. “T-thank you. You look pretty handsome too.” And he does. He’s wearing dark jeans, black shirt, and a dark leather jacket. You can’t help but think what he looks like under his clothes. As you look him up and down, your eyes stop on his lap. You can see a bulge, a very big bulge, under his jeans.

Eddie sees you notice and lets out a little chuckle. Before you can talk yourself out of it, you reach towards him and run your hand from his temple to his cheek.

Eddie stills, shocked. After a second, he grabs your waist and pulls you on top of him. Foreheads touching, you stare into each other’s eyes for just a split second before your lips meet.

Eddie’s hands are roaming up your back now, your hands tangled in his hair. “Fuck. I’ve been wanting to do this since I saw you at the bar.” He says into your mouth. 

“Mm. Me too.” You breathe just as he rolls his hips hitting your sensitive bud and you let out a moan. 

This is better than he imagined in your bed last night while he pumped himself. “I touched myself last night thinking about this. I was thinking about all the things I want to do to you.” He licks a stripe up the side of your face. 

His words and the friction make you moan into his ear. You tell him how you fingered yourself in the shower, imagining his fingers inside you.

Eddie swears he could cum just from hearing you talk. He scoots you back so he can pull his jeans down before grabbing your hips and rolling them across his cock. Eddie lifts up your dress and pulls your panties to the side. “Is this what you want?” He asks as his finger brushes your clit.

“Mhm. Yes, please, Eddie.” Your hands are pulling his hair and you place kisses down his face before sucking a mark on his neck. 

Eddie lifts you up so he can swipe himself through your folds before lining himself up with your entrance and sliding you down. You gasp as you take the full length of him before tugging his hair even harder.

He gives you a few seconds to adjust to his size before bucking up into you. You can’t hold in the moans that escape from your mouth and your entire body is trembling. You’ve never felt so full. You weren’t a virgin, but it felt like Eddie was stretching your walls as far as they could go. 

“Yeah? Is this what you thought about in the shower?” You can’t speak so you just nod your head ‘yes’. “Use your words, baby. I want to hear you.”

“Y-yes, this is b-better than what I imagined.” Eddie moved his hands from your hips to pull you to his chest. He cradled your head with one hand with his other resting on your lower back. 

Kissing your head he murmured praises into your ear. “You’re doing so good.”

“Eddie.”

Still inside you, he lifts you up and carries you to your bedroom. Placing you down on the edge of the bed and kneeling between your legs, he continues to pump in and out of you. Pulling your dress up he groped at you while using one hand to pull your legs to his neck. “Oh, you’re so wet for me, baby. Gonna cum soon?”

You can’t form words, you moan in response. But remembering what Eddie said earlier you manage, “Gonna cum.”

“Cum on me, baby.” he moves the hand from your tits to circle your clit. In seconds, you’re gushing around him. “That’s it, show me what you’ve been thinking about.”

Incoherent words and moans fall from your mouth as Eddie fucks you through your high. His thrusts become erratic and he’s moved to holding both your legs up against his chest. He’s gripping your calves so tightly, you know you’ll have bruises. 

“Where do you want me, sweetheart?”

Shakily, you whisper, “Inside me. Please.”

“All mine.” Eddie pulls you towards him as he thrusts and releases himself deeply inside of you. “Fuck.” He whispers as he lets your legs down and helps you into the bed. His jeans still around his ankles, he takes them off before climbing in beside you. 

You turn to face Eddie, your eyes glazed over, “I guess our date went well.” He laughs and pulls you in tighter. 

Eddie is tracing shapes along your back, “We’re playing at the bar in a few days. What do you say if you come as my girlfriend this time?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” You nuzzle your head into his chest. 

Just as the two of you are drifting to sleep in each other’s arms, there’s a knock at the door. You both sit up and listen to the person knock again, louder. “Hello? You guys in there?” 

You look at Eddie with wide eyes, “It’s Steve.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 2 is HERE

[morganitering]

Because I'm the Weakest

Pairing: yandere!Satosugu x fem!reader

Warnings: Rape/non-con, Dead dove, darkfic, dissociation, trauma, rape fantasy, rape aftermath, vomiting (not during sex), unhealthy relationships, non-consensual drug usage, drugged sex, canon typical violence, sexism, implied/referenced alcohol usage/abuse

Contains: F/M/M, spitroasting, oral sex, penis in vagina sex, blow jobs, face-sitting, come play, overstimulation, voyeurism, slight size kink, humiliation/degradation, vaginal fingering, mentioned Nanami.

Word count: ~6,5k

Summary: Growing up as a female sorcerer has not been easy, especially when you are overshadowed by two prodigies. You used to form a tight-knit friend group, but now in adulthood everyone battled their own demons whether it be a god complex or feelings of inferiority. Gojo Satoru revives a group chat that was almost long forgotten, inviting you and his boyfriend for a long weekend, just like the old days. Before the regrettable night, you wouldn't have ever thought that you'd need to raise a fist against a friend.

A/N: Hey everyone, another fic but this time featuring our two favorite dudes with insanity turned to the max. This fic is once again full of warnings and proceed with caution and read the tags! Remember to take care of yourself. Otherwise enjoy and feel free to like and comment <3

read on ao3 PART II

“Booring,” Satoru complained audibly as he looked through the streaming services’ different movies and series. The little icons changed from bombshell babes to twisted faces with titles written in blood. He was sprawled over the corner of a ridiculously huge couch and he was wiggling his foot as a nervous tick of his. He wasn’t wearing his usual garb, instead he had opted for something more relaxed and comfortable.

“If you’re so bored you should help us out in the kitchen,” Suguru sighed, his black hair draping over his shoulders, still slightly wet from the shower he had taken earlier. When you had pointed out that he was leaving droplets of water everywhere where he went, Suguru had just smiled at you and told you that it’s better for hair to air dry.

He held a knife in his right hand and the other one held onto a cucumber to keep it in place. His fingers were slender but by no means unmanly. Suguru wasn’t too fixated on the vegetable in front of him, chopping away with confidence only experience would provide.

“And where would the fun be in that since I got you two as my private chefs?” Satoru pouted as he shoveled candy in his face.

“You’re going to lose your appetite, if you eat candy now,” you chimed in, poking the halloumi that kept on sizzling on the pan. The water evaporated in a mist that warmed your cheeks in the cool apartment. It wasn’t actually cold in the open plan kitchen, but you had spent long enough in front of the appliances to break a sweat.

“I’d eat it anyway,” the white haired man whined as he got up from the couch finally settling on a tv series that started playing mindlessly in the background. “So, what am I supposed to do?” He asked after grabbing a piece of pomegranate from a small see through bowl. He walked behind you both like a shark, eyeing the ingredients and you, uncomfortably close.

“Set the table and learn to bitch less,” you joked.

“You wound me,” Satoru said, feigning sadness, but did as he was told.

The three of you were residing in an apartment that Satoru had bought himself from one of the skyscrapers surrounding Tokyo. After Jujutsu High it had gotten increasingly hard for the three of you to meet as adult responsibilities weighed heavily on both of their shoulders, – especially Satoru’s, but you saw the similar pain carried in Suguru just as well.

You were not weak, but you could not compare to the two prodigies. On the days when you felt down, the pain of third wheeling constantly ate you up, sometimes so much so that you rather left the two men talking together in the group chat. It furthered the wedge between you and them, until the messages became sparse and you almost could pretend not to know them.

It had been six months since the last time you met, but one day Satoru broke the silence and a notification popped up from your shared chat. It had taken you by a surprise, you were vaguely aware that even him and Suguru had issues with fitting each other in their lives, due to individual missions and what not. So the fact that Satoru decided to deliberately send a message to you as well, got you anxiously excited. He reached out to you. You. A high school friend that barely kept in touch with him.

“Guys! I refuse to work this weekend so come to my place. Let’s have a get together like the good old times ❤️ ❤️?? A little sleepover if you will!”

“Lol what about the higher ups?” Suguru had asked, typing back way too fast.

“Actually never mind I don’t want to be made into an accomplice in your crimes,” Suguru had continued.

“Am I invited too?” You had asked, hands shaking slightly as you stared at the bright screen, already tucked into bed. It was late, but Satoru was a known night owl.

“Damn, what have I done to earn this type of reputation 😭” Satoru complained, reacting to both your and Suguru’s message. You could hear his voice as if he was there in the same room as you.

“Of course you are invited, silly. I wouldn’t send this here if you weren’t.”

So now you were there, living an almost ridiculously domestic life with the couple that you had been hanging out with ever since you were sixteen. They had not changed too much. They were still both tall and slender but years had rid them of the rest of the baby fat as they started to resemble more men than boys, vigorous fighting showing in their bodies in an ever gained muscle mass. You supposed you were the same too. Battle hardened. That’s the word you were looking for.

You were just about to sit down but you saw long limbs reaching out to the white chair pulling it backwards. You looked at Satoru with a raised eyebrow. He was acting weird.

“What? I’m a host. I’m being hospitable,” he said, voice melodic as he pressed his hand on your shoulder to pet your arm reassuringly a few times. Suguru laughed quietly as he sat down next to Satoru.

You ate and drank, buzzing with energy. It was like no time had passed and you wondered why did you ever stop talking to these two. After a drink or two you were brave enough to ask for some hot gossip. Like every high school friend, you went through old drama, like how ugly Nanami’s haircut used to be.

“Has Nanami found love yet?” You had asked. He seemed like the type to find a decent relationship first out of all of you, but to everyone’s surprise it was these two men.

“Do you still have a crush on him? I heard that he’s quite a looker nowadays” Suguru bounced a question back at you with a smile tugging on his lips. It was that one expression that looked a tad too kind.

“No, I don’t. I was just curious,” you tried to move on from the subject. You did not really discuss your relationship history with these two, at least not anymore.

“Why?” Suguru asked, leaning on the hand he had placed on the table. The atmosphere felt off, it was as if he was challenging you. You looked at Satoru who seemed to be equally as interested in your answer.

You scratched your neck awkwardly.

“I- I think he’s too soft,” you said blushing at the implication of your words. You had turned your gaze to your almost empty bowl, your mind going to improper places. As you were buried in your embarrassment, Satoru and Suguru shared a silent look with each other.

At some point during the evening you had moved to the white haired man’s bedroom. He wanted to show you the view from the window since he lived on the 30th floor. It was magnificent. The busy streets were bustling even during the night and you stared at the small lights that blinked in different colors. Your eyes followed the cars that swerved left and right as some people were gathered up in front of bars for a smoke break. You barely could make them out from the height you were in.

Satoru’s bedroom was basically the size of someone’s apartment. The bed was huge and sleek, unlike the common area. This room was a lot moodier and darker and it actually showed that he lived here, small bits and bobs decorating shelves and few paintings were hung up on the wall that you reckoned were Suguru’s taste.

Your drinks had changed from light cocktails to expensive red wine that you were almost scared to consume, but when Satoru saw hesitation in you he made a point to assure you that it’s all on him and after that almost instantaneously Suguru asked you something, leaving you no room to overthink.

The uneasiness still followed you. It was a gut feeling that you were really bad at listening to. You did not believe you were in danger – at least you’d like to think that as a jujutsu sorcerer you’d be trained to recognize threats by now. Luckily the red wine relaxed you, lulling you to the feeling of safety.

The volume of music was loud as the three of you listened to some throwback songs that still made you shamelessly want to dance. You were celebrating embarrassingly in Satoru’s room laughing, swaying your bodies along with the beat. It was as if you were in a club, except this was way more intimate. The world spinned around you, the warm lights mixed with the glimpses of the night sky and the longer outlines of your friends. You felt light, time slowing down and going overspeed at the same time as if you were alone on the highway. Your friends’ smiles stretched on their faces, eyes twinkling manically as both of the men appeared to you in double. Eventually when you tired each other out the whole group collapsed on the bed still humming happily. Satoru’s bed was plush and big enough to have room for the three of you.

You noted the way the silk felt like a warm hug underneath you, the ceiling moving like a slithering snake’s skin on savannah.

Satoru was lying on his back on the left side of you, his white hair now more tousled than before whereas Suguru was on the right leaving you in the middle of the two men.

“I think we should play a question game,” Satoru’s voice was bordering on a whisper. The music had stopped.

You stayed silent. “Satoru, I’m not feeling too good,” you managed to say. The bed was a ship and you were a passenger of the sea.

“I didn’t know you’re that lightweight,” Satoru’s hand reached out to your head to pet you, the gesture meant to lower your guards, but in your ever increasing discomfort, his touch only managed to make your skin tingle with aversion.

“Just humor us for a bit, it could be like the good old days, right?” Suguru argued, flashing a dead smile at you.

“Okay, whatever. Ask me something,” you rolled your eyes, too tired to fight them in your weird mental and physical stage.

“Hmm,” Satoru turned to his side to face you, his blue gaze piercing yours as you were still laying on your back. You had no idea when he had removed his sunglasses. You heard Suguru moving next to you as well. “What do you mean by Nanami being too soft?” The way Satoru laid down the question was impish.

The tone of the conversation had taken a full one-eighty and you opened your mouth to answer with only lies on the tip of your tongue, but then you decided against that. Those two had a very good bullshit radar.

“Do you want to hear what I think?” Satoru grinned playfully as he licked his plump lips once.

“I think Nanami would bore you out of your mind, missionary on Mondays without the lights on? Ugh, I wouldn’t want that for my worst enemy,” he said, laughter hollow full of malice. You couldn’t believe your own ears.

“I think you want it rough and behind that tough girl act, there’s an insatiable woman with some wild fantasies,” he blabbered his obscene thoughts. “Tell me, have you ever had sex with two men?” Gojo’s voice was loud and it was as if he was talking to you from a speaker that had been locked in another room. He was too close, too far away and simultaneously too here.

“What the-” you got cut off.

“Don’t curse. It’s unseemly from a woman,” Geto said calmly.

“Answer me,” Gojo demanded. During high school you would have described Gojo’s eyes as a beautiful spring day. You would have said that he reminded you of blue skies with perfectly white fluffy clouds, but now his eyes had turned to something much paler and darker. They reminded you of deep untouched snow drifts turned to blue in the moonlight as they sparkled ominously, waiting for the first little animal that dared to break the pristine condition.

“What did you do to me?” Your voice was not your own, it was weak, the accusation of your words turning dull as the red wine you had drank earlier sanded the edges away.

“Nothing permanent,” Geto said.

His admittance striked terror in you. Realization hit you, you were not safe here and you felt the familiar warmth flowing in you like a second nature. You manipulated the cursed energy, channeled it and let it flow steadily in your body guiding the power to your hands, but something in it felt unstable, it felt like a chord that was almost broken just barely connecting.

“Did you know that some drugs really affect the ability to use cursed energy? Not that it would matter in your case,” Geto explained, his voice overflowing around you, sticking to your skin like honey.

“Fuck you!” You yelled letting out a gust of wind to both sides, throwing the two men away from you. They landed nimbly to the floor, like cats, as you yourself hopped up from the bed, your vision blurred, walls moving back and forth, small figurines on the shelves changing color others dancing in front of your eye lids. Your head ached, pain banging against your skull, gnawing at the nerve endings that sent panic infused messages across your body, screaming: Stop moving!

“Oh so you want to spar? Go on then, show me what you have,” Geto purred.

It was a pathetic attempt in your current state. Your feet took you towards the door that Geto had come to protect. Hands and feet clashed together in close combat as you drew your cursed energy that was flickering unevenly in your body. Every time you got too close to escaping either Geto or Gojo kicked you further away.

The white haired bastard wasn’t even using his infinity which only added salt to your wounds. He deliberately chose to prance around you, letting you at times touch him a wild smile on his face. There was no cursed energy, no flashy techniques, just you and two overpowered men.

“Do you remember what they said in school when facing someone stronger than you?” Gojo asked, dodging your fist.

“Don’t be a hero,” Geto grabbed your arm and twisted it painfully behind you. “Contact someone better equipped to handle it,” he said and shoved you forwards with a force so great that you staggered towards Gojo’s table with the MacBook wobbling with force earning a “Hey, that’s my computer!” protest from the man himself.

The lights went out with a sound of shattering glass, leaving the three of you enveloped in the darkness, only city lights illuminating the room. Disorientated by the sudden change in environment you froze, breathing heavily as the two men practically surrounded you. Gojo appeared in front of you not a hair out of place.

“And with that, you’re dead. You really should not get distracted during training,” the white haired man shared his advice talking to you with the same tone he used on his pupils. “Truce?” He offered his hand.

You looked up. There was something sinister about the way they hovered over you. Geto’s beautiful prince-like features had turned harsh and angular, the shadows sharpening his face even more. You swallowed a bunch of bile, the effects of forcing yourself to move taking place.

“The power disparity is too big,” Geto said. He almost pitied you. You were a smart girl, you’d figure the best move soon.

You grabbed the hand bitterly. Gojo helped you up and Geto wrapped his arm around your waist when you were about to fall again.

“Careful,” he mumbled, his hand trailing underneath your shirt. His touch felt cold against your burning skin that was damp from sweat. “We wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself,” he taunted.

“Take her shirt off. I’ve waited long enough,” Gojo said impatiently, tapping his foot on the floor.

“Always so demanding,” Geto chuckled as he worked your shirt up, unclasping your bra unceremoniously, your breasts now free for the two men to ogle.

“Perfect tits,” Gojo said as he pawed at you and played with your nipples. You were completely overwhelmed and out of energy. Luckily, you did not have to stand on your own as Geto helped you to stay up his hands unzipping your jeans.

“Why me?” You squeaked your head drooping in defeat as you looked at Geto’s hand that vanished underneath your panties, your trousers still on you. Your question went unanswered.

“Satoru I think you might have been right about your theory,” You felt Geto’s smile on your neck as he referenced the earlier conversation regarding Nanami.

“Really? Is she wet?” Gojo asked curiously.

“Soaking,” Geto said as he explored your soft folds with ease. “Did fighting us make you feel better about what’s going to happen? At least you can tell your friends that you did not break easy,” Geto mumbled onto your skin pressing kisses to your neck, his hand still working on you going up and down tantalizing on your slit.

Gojo dropped to his knees pulling down the rest of your clothes. A whimper left your mouth as you shook your head powerlessly.

“Lift her leg up,” Gojo instructed. Geto slid his hand behind your right knee, lifting it up till you were wobbling on one foot as you leaned on him for support. The white haired man had his lips slightly apart as he looked in awe at the sight unfolding in front of him. His mouth was watering as Geto maneuvered his hand back to your folds, spreading them in front of Gojo’s face so that his boyfriend could take a long hard look at everything you were offering.

You saw the gears turning in Gojo’s head as his expression turned to a mischievous one. “I want her to sit on my face,” he licked his lips and made his way to the bed, throwing the shirt on the floor.

“Can you move?” Geto asked as he let go of your leg, holding onto your trembling body. He tipped your head towards him, his face looking almost worried. It reminded you of the old times, but this was not the old Suguru. This was someone new. Twisted.

He helped you to the bed, where Gojo had been waiting, completely naked, his chest heaving in anticipation. Your eyes scanned him from head to toe, stopping at his cock that had already started to curve upwards. It already looked big, bigger than anything you had ever taken.

“Like what you see baby? Cause me too,” Gojo said jokingly. “Well, come here then or do you want to fuck us dry? Because I’m fine with that,” he hurried you, the threat looming over you.

You climbed on top of him, saddling his face. Gojo’s hands immediately grabbed at your ass, pulling you towards his mouth. You could imagine the pink tip of his tongue trying out where you were the most sensitive. He was too impatient to tease you, quickly finding the bundle of nerves that was begging for his attention. He lapped at it as obscenely wet noises filled the room. Gojo sucked on your clit and you moaned loudly, throwing your head back, a sheen layer of sweat on you.

You felt him hum into your cunt as you felt the weight shift behind you on the mattress, Geto’s hand moving on Satoru’s length, pumping it roughly.

“You see, Satoru here is a bit of a munch. He is loud during the day, but put a cock in his mouth and it works wonders at silencing him. Apparently he likes the taste of pussy too,” Geto said with a devious smile on his lips. Gojo groaned animalistically into your wet heat as the black haired man felt his own hardness straining against his boxers. It took everything in his power to not to take off his clothes and fuck you till you were cock drunk and babbling incoherently, but he had too much fun playing with you.

“How does it feel like having the strongest sorcerer lapping you up like a regular man?” Geto’s voice was just a hush in your ear. “Men and women around the globe are going to be jealous when they hear that Gojo Satoru wanted to stick his dick in you,” Geto taunted you both as his hand focused on rotating around Satoru’s tip, spreading out the drops of precome around his cock. Satoru bucked his hips up involuntarily.

You came. Hard. You thrashed around Gojo’s head as the man between your legs held onto you stubbornly, licking and sucking through your orgasm. You felt something warm trickling straight to his face as the pressure in the lower half of your body exploded. Your voice was high pitched and desperate as you rode his face till you were sore, your already weak legs giving out.

Gojo pushed you off of him, gasping for air, pupils blown out in arousal. His face glistened in your juices and his saliva.

“You know what, for a man who’s shaming me for being talkative, you sure speak a lot yourself Suguru,” he pointed out. Suguru laughed, honest to god laughed, his eyes squinting contently as Satoru pulled him into a kiss.

There was something incredibly erotic watching the two men, knowing that Geto would taste the remnants of you as their lips smacked together messily. Their bodies tangled together, black hair flowing around white as Gojo buried his hand in Geto’s luscious strands. Gojo pulled his boyfriend’s face up gently exposing the bobbing Adam's apple that he kissed reverently. It was now Geto’s turn to saddle Gojo.

“I think you need to take your clothes off. Give her a little show,” Satoru said, biting into the skin on Suguru’s clavicle as his hands fumbled with the black haired man’s belt that opened with a clink.

Geto pulled his black t-shirt over his head, his taut muscles flexing. It felt like forever when Gojo caressed the man on top of him, his face in a constant grin. He took down the boxers inch by inch until Geto’s cock sprang out after being suppressed inside his clothes for too long.

“Get on fours,” Gojo ordered as you clumsily did what he told you to. He moved behind you whereas Geto took place in front of you.

“Arch your back.”

You stretched yourself, lowering your torso and propping your butt up almost as if you were offering yourself on a silver platter. Gojo’s hand came down to your ass with force making your body jerk when he dug his nails on the soft skin.

“Wow, you must fuck a lot of dudes judging by how low you can go. If I knew you were a whore, I would have bent you over earlier,” he laughed, his finger prodding on your entrance.

Geto pulled you from your hair. It wasn’t the nice kind of pain that came when one would grab them near the scalp; instead it stung like hell, when Geto yanked your head up, putting you on the perfect level of his cock.

Gojo inserted one finger simultaneously inside you and almost immediately added another. You whined as his fingers scissored you open, your lips almost touching the head of Geto.

“You know, I get to lie with this amazing man every day. Show him the same respect as I do,” Gojo said. Had you not been caught up in their fucked up power play, their love for each other would have truly warmed your heart.

Geto’s thumb stroked your cheek as if to apologize for what was about to happen. He let his hand trail down to your bottom lip, swiping across it gently.

“Open.”

Satoru pushed his hand almost knuckles deep into you, a guttural moan making its escape from your lips as he used his hand to finger fuck you. Geto used your opening mouth to his advantage to stuff his cock in you. He was huge, your jaw already hurting. His tangy taste spreaded in your mouth as he softly rocked back and forth, not wanting to choke you just yet.

You hollowed out your cheeks and focused on the tip of his cock as you used one of your hands to touch what you could not fit. Geto’s eyes were half lidded as he guided your head to a rhythm that he liked as you squirmed underneath Gojo’s touch.

Gojo removed his hand from you leaving you empty, you almost missed the sensation of him, but soon felt the man behind you poking your folds with something much bigger than his fingers. You mewled in panic when he entered you, your eyes widening in shock. God he was huge.

“Focus. Eyes up here,” Geto said, patting your cheek with an open palm. The way you looked up at him made Suguru feel close to high, your pupils widened to the size of a plate, eyes glistening in tears that you held back, still holding onto a sliver of pride. Brave girl, he thought to himself.

Gojo fucked you sloppily, squelching, slapping and your gurgling filling the room as both the men used your body to chase their own highs. You felt like you were drowning and when one withdrew the other one rammed into you without a second thought. It was hard to keep your attention on Geto when his boyfriend did everything in his power to make your task at hand challenging, when his long cock grazed upon that one spot inside you from time to time.

“I’m going to finish in your mouth,” Geto was out of breath, his grip tightened around your skull. Gojo groaned behind you with his fingers digging into your hips. You were sure that you’d have handprints tattooed on your skin by the end of this night.

Geto’s movement got erratic, his cock hitting the back of your throat making you gag around him painfully. The black haired man relished in the wet warmth your mouth provided him. He was panting as pleasure coursed through him, your despaired moans only driving him further. Hot stripes of his come coated your mouth. You wanted to spit it out, or swallow it, anything to get rid of it as your face soured in disgust.

“Keep it in your mouth,” he advised as he pulled out of you. You almost wanted to spit it on his face as an act of defiance. Geto smiled at the confrontational look on your face as if he knew what you were thinking. “Good girl,” he purred when you had decided not to go against him.

Gojo flipped you quickly around to lie on your back, your legs floating in the air awkwardly as he entered back into you swiftly. He pulled you in a feverish kiss, his soft lips slightly swollen. His tongue prodded inside your mouth, Suguru’s come spreading into his mouth as you explored each other. It felt disgusting, playing with someone’s fluids like this, but somehow it made your cunt clench around your white haired high school friend.

There was something deeply primal in the way Gojo drove into you, his head almost resting on yours as he fucked you deep and hard. You were vaguely aware of Geto’s eyes following the act in front of him, admiring the way Satoru’s muscles moved with every move, drinking up the disheveled look on you.

Satoru’s hips came to halt as he plastered his seed on your walls, making sure that he wasn’t too deep, keeping his thrusts shallow enough so he could see him leaking out of your used cunt.

“Fuck,” he breathed out, spent, the after glow warming him. “You didn’t come right?” He asked you, feeling slightly tired.

“No, but it doesn’t matter,” you rasped out your throat feeling hoarse after the abuse it had taken. Frankly you wanted to sleep as well.

“Suguru, can you help her out? I want to watch,” Gojo said as he fluffed the pillow underneath him to get into a comfortable position as if he was about to open the television and watch his favorite show.

“If you hold onto her other leg,” he said as he propped your left leg around his waist and Gojo took hold of your right one. You were helpless and unable to protect yourself when you tried to squirm away from the two devious men.

Geto’s nimble fingers gathered up Satoru’s come that was trickling down between your cheeks. He pushed it back inside you, moving his fingers slowly without a hurry in the world. It reminded you of the calm before a storm.

“You’re going to give us one more right?” Geto’s voice was reassured when he added another finger into you, thumb trailing to your sensitive clit. He knew just what to do, to get you fast back to the edge that you were teetering on earlier, already feeling overstimulated from the rough treatment you had gotten. His fingers made a come-hither movement hitting precisely your g-spot.

Gojo held onto you whispering sweet nothings to your ear, his thumb caressing your thigh. He was gentle, his touch light, eyes half lidded as he enjoyed the small whimpers coming from your mouth. He spoke to you, told you how much he had wanted you from the beginning. He spoke of how he saw that you wanted him – them. Gojo let you know how well you were doing, taking what they dished out to you, how you were brave and oh so good. He attempted to bury you in his twisted love, six feet underground, anxiety and arousal covering Geto’s fingers.

It was too overwhelming. Gojo next to you, Geto between your legs, your world still spinning around you, overstimulating touch and a coil about to snap. You wailed hollowly as you came apart on Suguru’s fingers one last time.

***

It was deep in the night, around two AM to be precise. You had shot your eyes open as the wave of nausea hit you. The two men had fallen asleep cuddling each other, limbs tangled on each other. You got up as quickly as you could, your head ache punishing you from your choices, stomach churning dangerously.

With a pitter patter from your naked feet, you carried yourself to the extravagant bathroom, barely having time to put the lights on as your nausea took over.

You doubled over the toilet seat, emptying your stomach of your earlier dinner and whatever else your friends had slipped in your drink. You held onto your hair desperately trying not to make a mess. A warm hand landed on your fist bunching up the rest of your hair gently.

“It’s okay. I’m here,” Suguru said affectionately, stroking your head. “Let it all out. You’re going to feel better soon.”

The acidic taste filled your mouth once again as if it was reacting to Suguru’s company. Your body forced you to throw up stomach fluids after having nothing else in it.

The way he took care of you brought up memories of the times you had taken one too many drinks, after your partner of that time had broken up with you. You remembered the way he had held you crying, snot and tears covering his shirt as you broke down.

The sound of water pouring into a glass echoed on the walls and you heard the rattle of an ice drawer disturbing the silence.

“You should drink this,” Satoru showed up leaning on the door frame, offering the glass to you. You hesitated.

“It’s just water.” He said and took a sip as if it would prove you anything. “See?”

You grabbed it from his hand, when you decided that you didn’t care anymore, downing the entire glass in almost one swing. The cold scraped your tender throat punishingly. You should have drank more slowly.

Waking up after the night had turned to day, the windows no longer covered by the blinds. You did not remember a lot of the act, except vomiting, but that came afterwards. The city was already moving fast, a new day offering new opportunities and new exciting journeys.

You felt physically a lot better, still weird, but you no longer felt like collapsing to the ground nor did you see things twice. It was almost like you had a hangover. You looked around Gojo’s room rolling on the bed that was empty feeling relieved of having space.

There were still signs of yesterday's fighting, but random shards had been taken care of and the lightbulb changed into a working one. You had your own pajamas on you, not having the slightest idea when and how you got into your clothes. Feeling nervous you got out of the bedroom walking to the toilet to empty your bladder. As you wiped, you felt around your crotch, searching for the remainder of different body fluids. You had cleaned yourself up. Or someone had.

You washed your hands, scrubbing them together with fervor, pumping out a heap of soap on your palm.

You repeated it once.

Twice.

Until your skin was scrubbed dry.

You looked at yourself in the mirror just to see familiar features, but not anyone you could recognize. You opened the overnight bag that you had left on the side of the sink to brush your teeth and spit out the foaming toothpaste. A smell of dough frying on the pan wafted to your nose as you heard commotion from the kitchen.

You took steps to the living room to find Suguru in front of the stove flipping pancakes as Satoru was hunched over a pile of strawberries nibbling on them happily. Upbeat rock played in the background as the two men joked around and chatted. You stared at them, something seething in you.

“Good morning! We’re making brunch,” Suguru exclaimed as he flipped a pancake over “Do you want coffee or tea?”

Nails bit into your skin as you clenched your fists together hard, your knuckles turning to white as anger turned on like a switch. You wanted to rage, go absolutely berserker, throw things at them, scream how dare you over and over. Some part of you also wanted to forget the night, pretend that it’s a nightmare, sit down with them to eat some fucking brunch.

“What if I tell someone,” it wasn’t really a question that you wanted them to answer.

“And what would you achieve with that?” Gojo retorted, popping a ridiculously big strawberry in his mouth, leaving the green stem outside as he bit down, the trash floating to the table.

Suguru placed the now ready pancake onto the white plate. He grabbed the black ladle to pour more mixture on the warm pan, before he started speaking calm but collected. It was this matter of fact tone that he used as if he was disappointed in your stupidity since he was always speaking the truth. The audacity of men or something like that.

“You know first hand how some clans look down on women, not believing that women should be sorcerers in the first place. So how do you think these powerful people are going to react to you saying that two of the strongest sorcerers assaulted you?” He mused, the conversation reminding you of ethics class where people discussed your human rights as a starter dish, completely disregarding that they were talking about real lives.

You knew how those types of people would react. They would see it only as normal, a woman’s place as a breeding machine, your sorcerer blood and womb more precious than your soul. They would argue that you were lucky or maybe that you had asked for it. Besides, it wasn’t exactly atypical of people in your line of work going insane, the trail of dead comrades keeping one up for countless nights. And who better to take anger out on than the people who are perceived as less.

“Even if they did believe you, it wouldn’t change our life at all. They need our skills and well, his money,” Suguru continued as Satoru grabbed three coffee cups and placed them on the kitchen island. As if, you were staying. “It would change yours though.”

That’s when realization hit you. They were the type of evil that were completely aware of their sins. They knew exactly what was right and wrong, but they simply did not care, the world as their oyster.

“You’re insane,” a tear rolled down your eye, your body trembling like a leaf.

“Not denying that one,” Satoru quipped, not taking anything serious like usual.

“If you want to, you can leave. You are free to run your mouth however you want, block our numbers, whatever makes you sleep better. Or you can eat some pancakes as friends and have powerful allies for the rest of your life,” Geto said. “I’ll ask again, coffee or tea?”

You bit your lip as the conflicted emotions flashed through your face. You despised that you viewed them still as your friends as much as your enemies. It was weird to love someone who had hurt you in one of the most violating ways possible.

“Coffee,” you mumbled as you sat down on the bar stool hanging your hands on your sides as Suguru poured the dark liquid on the blue cup.

“We got you Plan B too,” Satoru said, throwing the cardboard box into your hands. “You should take it. I’m not ready to be a father,” he added.

You fumbled the package open, popping out the small pill on your hand. You didn’t know how they knew that you weren’t on birth control nor did you really care. You placed the tablet on your tongue taking generous gulps of water as the couple continued on cooking.

Music played as the sun shone brighter, lighting up the whole kitchen, furniture basking up in the natural glow. You ate in peace, mainly Satoru and Suguru talking together but every once in a while you added something in the conversation. You fell quickly back to the old habits, maybe at times chuckling at their stupid jokes.

You pushed away the night. You tucked it in a corner of your mind that you did not dare to look at for many weeks to come. You were just three old high school buddies catching up, nothing more. The flashbacks you saw were not yours and the long weekend continued on as a happy sleep over.

[flowerfreya]

The Office AU

This is part 3

Part 1 / Part 2

Just getting some more backstory for the reader and the boys as well. I’m trying to make it interesting but if it feels like to much filler let me know pleaseee

Poly!141 x reader

Content: reader backstory , and they have a girlfriend???!!!

He sees you before you see him and that is because you're taking a nap at your desk, your head down with sunglasses on, at least that's what he thinks. All the lights are off because they are motion sensored and when Simon comes in because of course he is the first one here the lights turn on. You shoot straight up sunglasses askew.

“Morning”

“Good morning Simon” You smile nervously. “ I got here at 6 am so I just took a quick cat nap before everyone came in and I had an alarm set for 7:30 before everyone came in but it looks like we have an early worm”. You’ve changed from the sunglasses to your regularly prescribed glasses, standing up with your makeup bag.

“Why did you get here at 6 am?”

“Oh, my boyfriend gets here at 6am and you know only one car”, you shrug like it's a normal occurrence. He just lets out a hum and just sits at his desk and you walk to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

By the time everyone comes in, you're ready for the day. You greet everyone with a smile and wave.

Simon stands up, which you don’t normally see, “Need to talk to you”, as he walk to John. Simon shuts the door after entering and you're a bit nervous that he's going to tell you about sleeping and you're trying not to stare but you can’t help it, you really need this job. Soap comes up to your desk and peaks over, “Did you get anything from TJ Maxx, Hen?”.

“You know about that?”

“Aye”

“Ha, well I never got a chance to go, but maybe this weekend”, you don’t say because when you got home you had to do all the chores that didn’t happen when you were at work and then you were so tired, you did your skincare and knocked out. He questions why you didn’t go and respond with a basic one liner, you know life. You look up at him and smile , he opens his mouth and looks like he’s about to say something and John’s door opens back up , only Simon leaving and John's voice carrying out in the office building calling your name, “Let me see you in here” . You move quickly half thinking your going to get fired and take a seat and instead of word vomiting like you did before you just sit there and wait.

John sighs and shakes his head like he can’t believe what he’s about to ask,“Love, why are here so early” .

Your so embarrassed about your car situation and how it’s already affecting your new job, “Me and boyfriend, only have one car so I have to ride with him and his shift starts at 6am so that’s why”

“One of the guys are me can pick you up on the way to work, if you want”

“Oh no , I don’t mind getting up early unless you mind me being here early…..” you trail off , hoping that this won’t be such a big deal.

“It’s fine, bird. Just don’t want you to go sleep on us waking up that early and working is hard”

“Oh no, I’m good. I just take a nap before everyone gets here, if that's okay, I don’t charge it on my time card”.

“That's not what I'm worried about”. You look away , not sure what to say and your eyes fall to his desk. He has around 20 challenge coins that look like from his time in the military. You see pictures with all the boys , some in uniform , some in just civvies, but they all look happy and so close it makes your heart hurt. You decide to change the subject.

“How long have you known the boys?”, you ask, gesturing toward the pictures.

He cocked his head to the side and smiled,”I feel like I’ve known them forever”. He sounds so fond of them and you can see the connection between them from the few days you’ve worked there. You're about to ask another follow up question but then you are interrupted by a knock and then the door opening.

“John”, a woman exclaims loudly and hops around the desk and gives him a kiss. It's a giant kiss. Somehow also…wet. Unprofessional. You know your mouth is open and you are staring but like what else are you supposed to do.

“Kelly, the door was shut, that means I was in a meeting. You know that.” ,he says in a low voice.

“Honey, I didn’t see her the-” , you cut her off ,” Oh,no I was just leaving“. You stand up and attempt to push in the chair but it doesn’t fit under the desk, so now everyone is looking at you attempt to push in a chair that you actually can’t. “Okay, I’m just going to go, do you want it open or shut?”, you ask.

They both say the opposite answers at the same time. You look between the both of them. “Uhhh”, you don’t even know who this woman is and what she is to tell and how much pull she has in the office.

“Open.”, John states matter of factly.

~

You’ve been sitting at your desk for around 20 minutes. You haven’t done that much work because the door is shut , the blinds are closed and you wonder what they are doing in there and its distracting you. You message Soap.

>>come here.

Soap looks up at you with eyebrows raised. You motion your head in a come here motion. He leans against your desk, “Aye, hen” , you try to make sure your tone doesn’t sound like a crazy lady, “who is Kelly”, and maybe you shouldn’t have ask because he stiffens up and avoids eye contact with you and hmmms.

“Oh, nevermind you don’t have to answer”, you add a chuckle to end as to not be awkward and look down at your keyboard.

Speak of the devil and she will appear , Kelly steps out of the office and see’s Soap and gives him an intimate hug, she knows his body she’s done this before. “I’m going to go to the annex and say hi to Gaz”, Kelly mentions as she moves toward the back of the office.

You see it for what it is, they share. Which is fine you do not judge on relationships but you don’t know what you thought was going happen between Soap or Johnny or even Simon like you have a boyfriend for christ sake.

Your boyfriend comes in, hes in a good mood. He wants to go out for dinner , he of course picks the place. Your just happy you don’t have to cook. Your shutting down your computer, putting on your jacket and getting you lunch box. You wish them a goodnight. John comes out of his office, “Everything, okay”, you nod your head and smile. It doesn’t matter anyway. Your happy. Your so fucking happy so it doesn’t matter anyway.

~

They “break up” with Kelly that night. They do it at a nice restaurant and do it immediately so she won’t get any other ideas. Simon doesn’t say anything, he knows Kelly only put up for him because they are a package deal. She of course ask why and John take points and lets her down gently but firmly. Then they get up and brainstorm how to get their Hen.

[malum-forev]

Second Trimester

Authors Note: Thank you guys soo much for the love you gave this story! Here's part 2!

Part 1: First Trimester

She knew something was up when Bucky insisted on picking her up and driving her to the compound. He rubbed two gloved hands together nervously as she locked up her apartment door. 

“You look even more anxious than when we made bean.” She chuckled. 

Bucky let out a staggered breath running a hand through his newly short hair. “I’m sorry, m’not trying to make you nervous it’s just- well, I don’t have any family left, biological family that is. And those dorks are kind of my chosen family. Think of this like meeting your in laws- except they’re not your in laws because we’re not dating, they’re Avengers and they kind of think you got pregnant on purpose.”

(Y/n) gulped, suddenly feeling like a knot of spikes parked in the middle of her esophagus. “So much for not trying to make me nervous.”

“Sorry… again.” Bucky shut his eyes for a second. “I’m not great at the talking part- I don’t usually talk this much. I don’t know what’s come over me.”

Once he opened his eyes back up, Bucky was greeted with a smile that melted the tension. He didn’t know how she did it, one soft look from her and all his problems were suddenly gone. 

“I like your word vomit.” (Y/n) smiled and without thinking twice, she laced the fingers on her right hand with the ones on his left hand. “You don’t have to be nervous alone, you know. We’re in this together for the next eight months and at least my lifetime. I don’t know how long you’re planning on living, how about we round it up to the next seventy years.”

Bucky’s throat went dry and he tried to keep up with her pace walking. He looked down at their linked hands with widened eyes. It had been years since someone had touched his left hand, let alone do it on purpose and without flinching. 

Bucky learned the hard way that some women only wanted to be with him so he could use the vibranium on them, see what it was capable of doing. It all felt so wrong to him, using the arm that was given to him to kill for something other than that. He’d been ashamed of it for so long that he lived life around it. Covering it with a jacket and gloves even in the scorching New York summer. Using his right hand to open doors and help old ladies cross the street, wanting to bring the least amount of attention to his left limb. But in this moment, he didn’t feel discomfort or humiliation; quite the opposite, he felt a calming blooming sensation coming from their joined hands. Like the sun had risen after a long winter and it was casting its warming yellow glow on him. 

He straightened his spine and squeezed her hand, being careful to not put too much pressure but making it clear he welcomed the gesture.

An hour later, it was her who needed Bucky’s hand to hold. She was sitting at the end of a long conference table with people she never thought she’d meet staring her down. 

Captain America, who’d insisted she call him Steve, sat closest to her with his elbows resting on the table. (Y/n) could see the battle going on in his head by the different wrinkles that showed up on his expressive face. Going from excitement to worry in seconds. Next to him was Natasha, the redhead was surprisingly the most inviting of them all, giving (Y/n) a genuine smile. All the way in the back of the room stood the Falcon, Sam hadn’t said a single word and kept his eyes laser focused on her. Like he was waiting for something to give up the fact that (Y/n) was using Bucky. With his arms crossed over his chest, he leaned on the wall and narrowed his eyes. 

Finally, Bucky came back into the room with a glass of water which he placed in front of her. 

“Guys, I really wanted you to meet-“

Bucky’s quiet voice was replaced by Sam’s booming tone. “Have you even thought about how this is going to work out?!”

Groans came from both Steve and Nat.

“You promised to behave.” Steve shot daggers at Sam but he just rolled his eyes. 

“This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.” Natasha said. “Before her, we thought it was impossible for people with the super serum to have kids. Think of how this will change the world. They can’t just pass it up.”

“The world,” Sam laughed dryly. “Think about how this is going to change Buck! We can do this, this job, because we have no family except each other. He’ll start pulling his punches and then what? He’ll leave a mission because the kid got sick?”

“That’s enough Sam.” Steve said. “What about Clint? He’s got a family and he got the job done.”

“Have you two even talked about what this relationship is?” Sam waved his hand between Bucky and (Y/n). “Are you two exclusive?”

“Yes.” Said Bucky but at the same time, (Y/n) said: “No.”

Bucky’s neck snapped towards her. “You’re dating? With my kid in there?”

(Y/n)’s brows shot up. “You made it very clear we aren’t dating so yes, I’ve been on a couple of dates.”

“I don’t know how I feel about you dragging my kid on dates with random men.” Bucky crossed his arms over his chest and she mimicked his action.

“This baby is as much my kid as it is yours. And until I pop it out, bean’s going to be following me everywhere I go. That means, if I want to go to the movies or dinner and someone asks me out, I’ll do whatever the hell I want.”

Sam’s arms shot up. “See, this is what I’m talking about. They have no idea what they’re doing!”

Natasha rubbed her temples. “How about this, the next time (Y/n) wants to go out on a date, Bucky takes her out. You’re going to start showing any second now and it’s gonna start getting harder and harder to get commitment-phobe guys to go on a date with the lady growing another human.”

(Y/n) nodded her head. “Sounds great to me.”

“Deal. I’ll take you out once a week.” Bucky uncrossed his arms.

“Twice.” (Y/n) shrugged. “I’m cute, a lot of guys wanting to take me out.”

Bucky’s nostrils flared at the thought of other men waiting behind her front door. “Twice, but I get to choose the place at least once.”

“You get to choose the place but I get flowers, once a week.” (Y/n) rested both elbows on the table and stared at Bucky. 

Bucky narrowed his eyes. “Fine, you’ll get the flowers but I’ll get three vetoes for any of the places you choose.”

(Y/n) brought her right hand closer to him, wanting to shake on the deal before he could back out. “Deal.”

“Deal.” Bucky said with a devious smile. “You need to work on your negotiation skills, dollface. I was already planning on getting you flowers for every date.” 

“I would have done the deal for one date a week.” (Y/n) smiled.

---

Bucky knocked three times on her door, exhausted from the night before. He’d been to Romania on a mission and gotten in at around 3 am, gotten up at 8 am and trained the day through. He leaned his head on the door and waited for (Y/n) to open the door. 

It had been three weeks since they’d reached the date agreement and he’d only had to cancel once. Bucky was quite proud of that, for someone who’s life had been upside down he was keeping his promise and developing some sort of routine. 

Today was his choice of date and in true Bucky fashion, he wanted to stay in. He’d picked up Chinese takeout and wanted to watch another of the thousands of classic movies he’d missed over the decades. 

Bucky heard her soft footsteps leading to the door and the lock turning.

“They didn’t have the pork dumplings so I got you shrimp. And since shrimp don’t have a high mercury level, we’re okay to eat it- you know, since doc sai-“

Bucky’s rambling was cut short the second his eyes locked on her body. His ocean blue eyes widened and his jaw went slack. (Y/n) was wearing a white tank top that clung to her body, it had been only a couple of days since they’d seen each other but Bucky felt like it had been a lifetime. His eyes locked on her chest for a couple of seconds, he couldn’t miss the sight of her bigger breasts, but what really caught his eye was the small bump that sticked out. 

“Y-you’re pregnant.” Bucky stuttered.

(Y/n) let out a loud laugh as she lead him into her apartment. “I thought you got the memo.” Taking the brown paper bag from his hands.

Bucky shook his head, trying to rearrange his thoughts but all that bubbled around in his brain was the image of her with her hands rubbing the small bump.

“I-I mean. You look pregnant.” Bucky’s eyes shone like the night’s sky, his hands itched to get closer to her, closer to the baby.

(Y/n) took her place on the couch, stretching out her hand to him. Bucky walked slowly, afraid of- he didn’t know what he was afraid of but there was a deep feeling settling in his stomach. When Bucky got closer, he absentmindedly brought forward his left hand before ripping it back and stretching out his right one. 

“It’s okay.” (Y/n) whispered, a sweet smile playing on her lips. “Bean loves every part of you.”

Bucky shook his head quickly, extending his right hand closer to her. 

(Y/n) sat up, taking both of Bucky’s hands in hers and lightly pulling him down until he was kneeling in between her legs. With a soft touch, she brought his hands to her protruding belly, rubbing small circles on the back of his hand. 

“Bean will never be afraid of you.” (Y/n) whispered, bringing one of her hands to the back of his neck, soothing Bucky with her touch.

His eyes filled with burning tears, begging to be let out. Years of being feared, years of being used, it all didn’t matter because it brought him to this exact moment. 

No words were spoken because he couldn’t think of words that expressed his feelings. Gratitude, happiness, peace. Instead of saying anything, he unlocked a piece of himself to her. That was the only thing he could do. So, for the next hour they sat in silence, tears falling freely from his eyes as he rubbed her belly softly. Bucky hummed tunes from the 40’s until (Y/n) fell asleep, her back pressed to his chest.

- -

It had been a long day at the compound’s med bay. (Y/n) had been poked and prodded for the better part of two hours and Bucky had been by her side the entire time. He knew better than anyone that being in that situation alone was horrible, a feeling he wouldn’t want anyone to experience let alone the woman carrying his child. 

“Are we almost done here?” Bucky said, his words rough and clipped. The doctors around the two of them scattered and nodded, afraid of him. But, (Y/n)? She just laughed.

“They’re just doing their job Buck.” She smiled. “Bean is an incredible scientific accomplishment that they just want to understand. Plus, I would much rather get my blood drawn and have a couple of ultrasounds than what I get done at the OBGYN.”

Bucky’s brows furrowed at the thought of her being even slightly uncomfortable.

“I’ve lost count of the people who’ve shoved their hands up to my cervix.” She laughed, getting up from the chair. 

Bucky rubbed tiny circles next to her belly button, loving the way her skin felt in his hands, as they walked out of the med bay.

“Isn’t that Sam?” (Y/n) asked, looking left at the man who’d barely talked to them since they’d decided to have the baby. 

“Yeah but I don’t think we should call him ove-“

(Y/n) interrupted him by yelling out Sam’s name and calling him over. 

Bucky saw the annoyed state his friend was in the second he walked towards them. 

“Hey.” Sam gave them a tight smile. 

“I know you don’t trust me,” (Y/n) said. “but just do this time.”

Sam’s eyes furrowed with confusion and it just deepened the second (Y/n) took his hand and brought it to her stomach. What was first hesitation, turned into surprise.

“Is- is that?” Sam asked feeling movement inside her belly. 

“That’s bean.” Bucky’s smile took over his face. 

“It’s moving.” Sam whispered, taking his other hand and bringing it to her stomach too. 

“I know you’re not totally on board with this,” Bucky said. “but you need to trust us. This is the right decision.”

Sam’s wide eyes bounced between the two of them. “I can’t concentrate on anything else but this baby trying to kick its way out of (Y/n)’s stomach. Bean’s going to have my fighting style.”

Both Bucky and (Y/n) smiled at each other, happy that Sam had finally called their baby Bean. 

Third Trimester

tagged: @kpopgirlbtssvt @shara-ne @namelesssaviour @hallecarey1 @aorifukuzawa @sammyssm @alana4610. @mrsjobarnes

[kelin-is-writing]

unlike what the general public says... i think that dabi is actually a very caring person, especially with and towards his beloved girlfriend.

when you two are together, walking on the sidewalk, he’s always the one who walks on the road’s side and if by chance you’re walking on that side, he would stop the two of you on your tracks, put an hand on your hip and gently move you to the inner of the sidewalk.

whenever you two are in crowded places, dabi would stand closer to you while using his arms to keep strangers and weirdos out of your personal space, then opens a path for you to get out of there while leading your figure with an hand resting on the small of your back, walking right behind you so he can have a better view of your surroundings and intercept any type of danger if it ever dares to comes your way.

ohh this one, dabi rests his hand on the small of your back a lot; when he wants to tell you something only you need to hear, when he wants to get your attention, when he wants to assure you about and with his presence, when he’s curious to see what you’re doing, when you two are shopping and you show him something you want to buy or simply when you’re standing while listening to the other members of the league talking.

he, for some reason, just feels so much reassurance in that gesture and he also hopes you feel that too (you do by the way, it’s impossible not to honestly).

whenever you’re nervous, in panic or worried about something dabi would hold your hand, intertwining your fingers and then start rubbing his thumb across your skin in soothing circle motions while looking straight into your eyes with what to other seems like an unbothered expression, but being the person closest to him you can notice all the minuscule details; his slightly furrowed eyebrows, blazing eyes that says thousand of words, lips pressed in a thin line with the corners of his mouth curved downwards, tensed jaw, vein on his scarred neck pulsing and ah... there he goes “it’s okay baby, i’m here” which means ‘nobody’s gonna touch you on my watch’ because he’s going to protect the hell out of you and burn to ashes every stupid ass piece of shit that dares to lay a finger on his woman.

when you guys are sitting down with league eating, dabi would go “slow down there princess, nobody’s chasing you” at you as he rests an hand on the back of your neck running his thumb on your nape gently, looking at you quizzically with a lifted eyebrow but still amused by all the sudden hurry into eating. you low-key remind him of a little hamster and that makes the arsonist melt every single time, he will never tell you though.

everytime you’re sick he does his best to be of aid to you. if you’re vomiting out your soul he’s gonna be there to hold up your hair and rest a reassuring hand on your back that rubs it in circles, if you’re down with a cold or the flu he would keep you warm using his quirk alongside the blanket and never let you lift a finger until you become able to stand without your legs wobbling like a newborn deer.

whenever you fall asleep somewhere that isn’t your shared bedroom, dabi would not leave your side for a second or he’s afraid something bad might happen to you when he’s not there, even when you guys are at the league’s hideouts. the moment the man sees your nodding off he sneaks an arm under your chin and resting his hand on the side of your head he gently places it on his shoulder or when you’re out like a light in kurogiri’s bar or any other hideout, dabi straight up puts your head on his lap and while the others just talk or do anything he’s there silently listening to their antics while caressing tenderly your head, run his finger through your hair or rest his hand on your arm as he watches over you.

the times when you guys are on mission, be it only the two of you or with the league, and are walking into decadent or rather small places dabi will put an hand over your head to keep you from bumping it into something or would walk ahead of you then tell you to hold his hand since it can be dangerous.

when it comes to a person he loves and cares for, i can see dabi become a little of a worry wart and always looking out for you even when it comes to the smallest of the things, that’s because he’s afraid of losing you and he doesn’t want that to happen with all his heart that many think he doesn’t have when he actually does, it just needs the right person to unlock every door of it.

[ssahotchnerr]

OMG OKAY, AN IDEA INSPIRED BY AN OUTFIT (or two) I FOUND ON PINTEREST!! (I'd like them, but you can't on anon)

Okay, so, you've been dating Aaron for a little while, long enough that you guys live together and Jack would like, love you.

Jack would have a lot of friends at school, and all the mom's would be really close and friendly and would hang out for the sake of having their kids hang out, and they'd sort of be friends in a sense. So, one day, (I don't have the logistics figured out, so bare with me.) you'd have been talking to one of the moms about a way to kind of insert yourself into the school a little more and make more friends so that it's less awkward when he wants to hang out with his friends. And, the mom would suggest you host a garden party. So, you'd throw a garden party with all the mom's and their kids and Aaron would just be the most supportive person ever because he knows how stresses you are. Like you'd be planning this for weeks and you'd spend hours setting up. He'd go to the grocery store with you and help you pick out good foods. And he'd help you pick out decorations and hang them all up. And he'd make sure everything was as perfect as you'd want it to be. And ofc he'd be there during the party and talking to the mom's about how sweet you are and about you in general.

Anyway, sorry about the word vomit that thought has just been rotting in my brain. 🫶

STOP <3333333 fem!reader

when you first bring up the party to him, you're a bit nervous. you're afraid he'll think it's dumb or unnecessary (which you know isn't plausible because he would never) - he's fully on board, soo supportive and immediately off the bat says, "let me know what i can do to help🥹" and gives you suchhh a sweet kiss 🥹🥰🥰🥰

all the prep <333 you're scouring pinterest for ideas constantly - food, decor most importantly, outfit planning, fun activities for the kids. hehe you do this in bed at night, with aaron resting his head on your shoulder. he's watching you scroll, adding input, answering your questions: "is this cute?" "what do you think about this???" and eventually he has to pry your phone out of your hand, place it on his nightstand, so you go to sleep 😭🫶🏻

and week of the party, he's the most helpful assistant <333 as the two of you are grocery shopping, he's in charge of the list, reading off to you what you need as you grab it off the shelves. aaron also helps put together little party favors, helps you make name tags for the tables, and simply does anything you ask of him. he knows how important it is to you that it goes smoothly 🥺 hehe i also like to think at this point, you, aaron and jack have moved out of his apartment to a house with a backyard - where the party will be taking place - so he's on landscaping duty. making sure the grass is mowed and neat, no leaves or sticks are laying around, and even jack helps!!! hehe you planted some pretty, colorful flowers for the occasion as it is garden themed, and jack helped with that 🥹 aaron also wakes up early with you the day of, to begin the prep and setting up. omg imagine him putting together the balloon arrangement you picked out 🥹<333 he would get SO frustrated LMAO but in the end it turns out perfectly 🥰🥰🥰

and since you're so stressed out about it going well, about the other moms liking you and making friends, if the weather is going to cooperate (you were in tears a few days before the party, the forecast predicted rain😭) and aaron clearly knows how stressed you are, he makes sure you take breaks, provides reassurances and helps you get your mind off it frequently <3 hehe he uses the excuse that he needs attention 🥺🤨🫵🏻 and how can you say no to him 🥰

and during the party, aaron's making sure you're enjoying yourself - this is your party. so he takes care of everything - if something is needed, he grabs it or resolves it himself, makes sure the plates of food are always replenished, cleans up. you went through allllll the trouble of putting this together, so you're going to be a part of it and not solely on hostess duty <333

aaron's even outfit-coordinated with you 🤭 his button-up of the day matches the color of your sundress <333 jack's shirt too!!!

AND AHHH HE LOVESSSS gushing about you to the other moms 🥰 he has the most sickly sweet smile on his face the whole time. about how sweet you are, how attentive and loving you are to jack, how lucky he is, how you complete their family perfectly <333 he of course compliments you on the party you put together too 🥹 "isn't it amazing? she did the most amazing job." 😭💞💓

and throughout, he keeps going to your side, pulling you close at the waist, kissing your temple 🥹🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭😭😭😭 and simply keeps an arm around you as often as possible <333 either listening or adding to the conversation you're partaking in <3

after everyone's left and the two of you are cleaning up - jack fell asleep on the couch, all the excitement wore him out 😭 - 🥹 aaron's keeps saying how proud of yourself you should be; the party turned out better than he could've ever imagined, the moms all loved you, he's proud of you, etc <3333 hehe he even throws in the teasing comment that now they're all going to be asking you when the next party is 🥹🥰

[austinsastrology8991]

> Mercury Aspects <

and why you sound like a Dumb Fuck

Mercury Aspecting Sun - Your voice is authoritative and you love to flex on people with your loud appeal. However, your voice being the centre of attention (usually) can create an atmosphere where you're very controlling of the conversation. This is not so bad because others do like to listen to you, but the problem is others may not always feel heard. You are gifted at speaking, and gaining recognition from that, but a good conversation isn't formed from a fkn monologue, or outwitting the other, its about conversing - not speaking AT someone. But you speak clearly and its easy for others to call you smart Mercury Aspecting Moon - Nervous speakers who's tone is so dependent on how they are feeling, you literally have to give them a pat on the back to get a coherent answer out of them. These people are very thoughtful, but since they have been thinking about what they want to say for so long, they find themselves stuttering, and word vomiting; because they want to be careful with what they say hence the overthinking tendencies. They speak softly and it can make others relax around them. But people like to ask them to speak up a lot, so not so relaxing for them I guess Mercury Aspecting Venus - Pretty voices, and they always say the right thing. People love to talk to them cause they have a very receptive ear, but also a willingness to share their own ideas, and this duality makes it so others cannot help but be completely enamoured by their talking. They can sell water to a well, a fire to a lighter, a Samsung to a Apple store; they really can convince you anything just because you got lost in their language.

Mercury Aspecting Mars - Harsher voices that love to get aggressive on da mic. They love to swear but more than that, they love to talk shit, and well they are good at it because they don't really put so much thought into what they are saying, they just say it. And others have to remind these natives that they said some fucked up shit, and that they should calm down lol. But they perform very well in arguments, and its because they thrive in da art of da comeback Mercury Aspecting Jupiter - Naturally bold in what they say, and always have something interesting to talk about, and they are interesting, but they are always in the mood to teach you something and its kinda exhausting. Jim carry has this conjunct and well he is interesting... But he is also always trying to teach you something, but unfortunately for him we don't really care we just want him to make us laugh. And I guess thats why this combo can be a little unfortunate, because most people feel educated enough and don't want to be further educated. They so badly want to teach others, but unfortunately for them its a hard thing to teach in tongues > people learn from experience more, and they'd rather be the master of their own destiny (not owe it to yoi) > ik ur trying to help but you have to understand we are a stubborn species Mercury Aspecting Saturn - They speak with so much nonchalance, and its a great way to make others listen to them; because they acting like the answer is simple. But it's actually because they >think< they figured out all the possible answers; since they have studied/researched a lot just so they feel some semblance of control on the topic. And if they don't speak on a subject, its because they don't know the answer, and this decisiveness in when and when not to speak makes others respect their opinion more often than not.

Mercury Aspecting Uranus - You guys jump from subject to subject with such little foresight of what the fuck was happening in the conversation, I frankly get a headache talking to you. You are def interesting to talk to, but your lack of direction in communication, can get on my nerves and I hate your lack of care about it. You talk about anything under the sun, and this makes you someone almost perfect to speak to. Until the other person realizes the conversation as a whole was utterly meaningless. But these guys lowkey geniuses and their voices are 'unique' Mercury Aspecting Neptune - These people are um. hard to say. they really go all over the place. I've seen these natives go from speaking like a retard > to a professor > to barking like a dog > then speaking like the president; and its just a normal conversation for them. I think its because they pick up on the energy of what the conversation needs most and they shapeshift into whatever that need is; so you really don't know what your gonna get. You really can never can tell what they are going to say next, and they are a master at confusing yo brain. Also high-key the best person to talk about life with; very sensitive and genuine when need to be. Mercury Aspecting Pluto - These guys love to get deep n emotionally invest in any conversation they can. They have extremely piercing minds, and cannot be bothered talking about a 'nothing', so they always probe your brain, and swerve the conversation into something deeply uncomfortable for the both of you. Hey its more interesting than a boring conversation, and well if they never brought it up, lets be honest; you never would have thought about it in the unique perspective that they gave you. Also they are so blunt and forceful, you literally have to stop everything because of the audacity of what the fuck came out they mouth. They speak intensely and put all focus onto you/subject at hand, its low key uncomfortable; but always interesting

[mymoodwriting]

Because You're Mine

Female!Reader x Werewolf!SKZ

Genre: A/B/O

Warning: Drugs, Sedatives, Needles, Betrayal, Revelations, Technology, Secrets, Society Norms, Mentions of Non-Consentual Operations, Assault, Mentions of Assault, Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Physical Abuse, Depression, Vomiting, Intrusive Thoughts, Suicidal Thoughts, Minor Self-Harm, Violence, Physical Violence, Claws, Fangs, Blood, Biting, Screaming, Mental Break Down

Words: 3.5K

Chapter Seven

(Prev//Next) (@starillusion13 @salfetkablog @youngunknownwitch @loveforred @hydroyaksha @meowmeeps @azazel-nyx @luvyev @stellasays45 @littlebaby-bunbun @bangchansgirlsblog @puppyminnnie @bahablastplz)

Prompt: With omegas completely removed from society, they needed their own communities and institutions to grow. All your life you had lived and gone to school alongside your fellow omegas, and orphaned alphas. You had managed to keep yourself together, but now at the university level, keeping your secret had grown impossible. You had to face your fears and make friends with an alpha eventually, and now was the time.

“Wakey, wakey.”

As you began to regain your senses you felt this slight pinch in your arm. You whimpered and opened your eyes, but everything was still a blur. You could tell you were back in the dorm by scent alone, and realization made you uneasy. You felt yourself lying on a couch and slowly sat up, rubbing the haziness from your eyes. Your vision cleared up and the first thing you noticed was Felix and Jisung sitting on the other couch, both of them with their heads down. Behind them Jeongin, Seungmin and Hyunjin stood, and they were watching you with blank expressions. You averted your gaze only to realize Minho and Changbin were standing behind you. Their presence made you feel rather small, and then your eyes landed on Chan sitting across from you. For a moment you just stared, but when Chan’s gaze met yours you immediately looked to the floor.

“Honestly… I’m surprised you actually did it. When I heard you wanted to run away, I thought you were just saying that, but you actually went through with it. That was quite bold of you.”

Chan reached over to grab a bag of gummies from the table. All your supplies had been laid out before you, like putting your shame on display. When you saw him grab for the gummies, you made an attempt to speak, but you never got word out.

“These aren’t laced with melatonin. They never were.”

“… what…”

You definitely weren’t all there, feeling this kind of fog in your head, so it took your mind a bit to process what Chan had said.

“… you… you pretended… you knew… all along… why… how… how did you-”

It suddenly clicked. The slow pain of realization spreading as you turned to face Felix and Jisung. Both of them refused to meet your gaze, and you could see Jisung was fidgeting. They were nervous.

“… did you… did you tell them…?” Silence was a very clear answer. “… how could… why… why-”

“Don’t be mad at them. They’re good omegas who do as their alpha says, give or take some persuasion. Afterall, I was the one who asked them to check in with you cause I knew you wouldn’t talk to any of us, so don’t blame them.”

“… then why… why couldn’t you… just let me go… just let me leave!”

“We can’t do that. It’s our job to protect you.”

“Liar!” You jumped to your feet. “You’re all liars!”

You only remained standing for a moment before you were hit with a dizzy spell. You stumbled a bit which prompted Changbin and Minho to help you sit back down. After a moment your head cleared, but it didn’t help with your current situation. Chan came over to your side, kneeling next to you.

“I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now, but I need you to understand we have your best interests in mind. Back then omegas were treated awfully. They were at the bottom of society, constantly abused and hurt simply for being omegas. That wasn’t their fault, but it wasn’t right to let that go on, so the OCPD was formed. We’re here to make sure you live a good, and safe life. Trying to run away isn’t a good idea, besides, you have a chip in the back of your neck that tracks your location.”

“What!”

You immediately reached up to the back of your neck, noticing in the corner of your eye that Felix and Jisung did the same thing. They didn’t know about this either, no omega probably did. For a moment you wondered when that had been done, but then the answer came to you.

“… that dinner… when you drugged the food… is that when…”

“Yes. The chip also tracks your vitals, and while you were under doctors made sure to operate so you couldn’t get pregnant. The meds are to balance your hormones as well. Of course the procedure is reversible but-”

“Chan!” Minho yelled. “You can’t-”

“This was not meant to be some big secret. All omegas are eventually told about this, they’ll just know about it sooner than most. If things are gonna get better here we have to be honest about everything.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“… there’s more…?” You mumbled. “… what else did you do to us…?”

“It’s not about what we did, but what those monsters did a long time ago. You asked me once why the OCPD existed, and the truth is we’ve known since the beginning of the academic year.” Chan took a moment. “When omegas go into heat for the first time, the experience is so intense they block it out. It takes a few days for them to regain their memories, and they’re very vulnerable around that time. Omegas suddenly get needy and if someone indulges them it runs the risk of frying the omegas brain, leaving them with nothing but their basic instincts.” 

“… oh…”

“This has never been public information, and it never will be, but back then… there were those who knew about this, and took advantage of it. Countless omegas suffered before those that created the OCPD put a stop to it. To protect omegas they were removed from society when they became of age, before going into heat. As you know, that didn’t work so well and omegas were completely removed from society. That’s why you’re here with us now, and why we’re here to look after you.”

“… you… you expect me to believe all of that…?”

“I know it’s a lot but-”

“Alphas were the ones that hurt me! They didn’t protect me or make me feel safe! They-”

“They’re all dead for their transgressions.”

“… what…?”

“Everyone involved with what happened to you were killed. At the time of the incident they didn’t know the truth about the OCPD, so if things had been revealed then they would have only been expelled, but that wasn’t the case. At least not anymore. They knew about omegas, and thus couldn’t return to society. It’s what they deserve for hurting you.”

“I… I didn’t…”

“I know. I’m sorry things had to get to this point.”

“I… I can’t leave… can I?”

“The world isn’t any better out there for you.”

“How would you know?”

“I’ve read the history books. I wouldn’t want you going through something like that. You’re ours to protect and look after.”

“I don’t want your protection.”

“But you have it.” Chan sighed. “I have to go speak to the headmaster about all this. So I’ll be back soon.”

“… what’s gonna happen?”

“I’m not sure. You could get taken by real agents, and I really don’t know what that entails.”

“I don’t wanna go off with strangers…”

“I’ll do my best. So for now you are to stay in the dorm. The others will keep an eye on you.”

Chan looked at the others before getting up, Minho following him. After a moment you stood up and Changbin grabbed your arm. You told him you just wanted to go to your room, and he escorted you there. On your way you saw Chan leaving, seeing a bunch of locks on the door. There was definitely no sneaking out again. Once you were in your room you shut the door, wanting to lock it but you realized the doorknob had been changed. You no longer had the option to lock your door, or your bathroom door for that matter. You wanted to be upset, but you didn’t have much energy.

You went over and sat on the floor, hiding behind your bed. You laid on the ground and stared at the ceiling, the tears starting to build up and blur your vision. Despite everything you had been told, the only thing that really stuck with you was the fact that you were at their mercy. You had felt like a prisoner before despite walking around freely. Now that was gone, and you could see you really were a prisoner, you had been all along. It’s just that now your cage had gotten much smaller. This room was supposed to be your safe space, but it certainly didn’t feel that way anymore. The tears started sliding down your face and you tried to keep your sobs to yourself, not wanting anyone to find you and try to comfort you. Not that they could.

You couldn’t help but wonder what the point of anything was. Things had been decided for you the second you were born, perhaps even before that. You grew up thinking you were safe, that your life was yours to live, but it had all been an illusion. You learned very early in life that everything was a lie. The smiles everyone wore were fake, yet you wanted to believe, you wanted everything to be okay, but that wasn’t true, not for you. Even the two you had trusted betrayed you, not necessarily of their own will but because you were helpless to the alphas. The stupid flaw in your very being that was used to cage you. All this was just starting to make you feel sick so you rushed to the bathroom to throw up.

Your head was still partially dizzy, and you haven’t felt fully present in a hot minute. That pinch from before had surely been some sort of sedative so you wouldn’t fight back. After vomiting you cleaned your mouth in the sink and then found yourself staring at your reflection. You looked so tired, so done with everything. The reasons you had been given to explain, to excuse all this, you didn’t care for it. You glanced down at your hands, raising them up and looking at them. You tried to summon your claws, but you had no idea how to do that, and the lack of success ultimately frustrated you.

In the end you just screamed and punched the mirror, shattering it in the process. You noticed a few cuts on your knuckles, but the sting didn’t really bother you. When you looked up you saw your broken reflection staring back. Your mind began to wander and the intrusive thoughts were getting louder. You grabbed a shard of glass, looking at yourself for a moment before holding the broken piece against your skin. You put pressure and slid it across your wrist. You saw red bloom from your injury, but it wasn’t as intense as you thought. Only a bit of blood came out, and you could see the edges of your injury starting to heal and close up. That didn’t change the pain, and how you bit down hard on your lip to keep from screaming.

“Y/n!”

The smell of blood had drawn attention, and next thing you knew Minho and Seungmin were in the bathroom with you. One of them was holding your wrist under running water, the other ripping up a towel to wrap up your injury. It was healing, they knew that, but at the moment they were just worried.

“Why would you do this?” Seungmin questioned. “There’s no-”

“You know why.” Minho cut in. “Just let it go for now. If she really meant to hurt herself she would have done more. Let me see your lip.”

Minho gently grabbed your chin and turned you to face him, seeing that your lip was already healing.

“Good. That must have hurt, huh?”

“…”

“Well, we certainly can’t leave you alone again, and I’m certain you don’t want an alpha around so the other omegas are gonna look after you. I doubt you want them in here so how about you get comfortable in the living room.”

It wasn’t really a request or suggestion, but an order. You had lost your privilege to be alone, although the omegas weren’t really better than the alphas. Chan hadn’t gotten back in the evening, but you told yourself to not worry about him, he wasn’t someone who deserved your attention. The alphas had made lunch, with Felix’s help, but you didn’t want to eat. The omegas ate in front of you, showing you nothing was wrong, but you certainly weren’t going to trust them. So instead Jeongin came over to you and handed you some chips and a bottle of water.

“They’re from the cafeteria, and not tampered with. Can you at least eat this?”

You stared at the chips for a minute before cautiously taking the bag. You examined, not sure what you were looking for, but you figured it would be okay. So you opened the bag and began eating. It wasn’t a proper meal, but it would help stave off the hunger. Jeongin smiled and set down the water bottle, leaving you with the others. For the most part you kept your back to the other two, not even wanting to see their faces, but you couldn’t really block out their scent. You just wanted things to be quiet, but of course they’d eventually try to talk.

“Y/n… we’re really sorry…” Jisung began. “When… when you told us… believe me we wanted to get out of here with you but… the alphas… Chan… he’d corner us and… his pheromones… they were never gonna let us leave but…they were messing with us to see if-”

“I know.” You mumbled. “I know… I can’t really be mad at you… it’s not your fault… but I’m still upset… or angry… or depressed… I don’t even know anymore… it’s all over anyway… I tried, and failed… they’re probably gonna pay more attention to me now… just… don’t talk to me… I can’t right now…”

“Alright…”

You sniffled, not wanting to break down and cry again, not out in the open. Time seemed to drag on but eventually the sun went down. You could hear how the dorm got quieter and quieter. Jisung and Felix eventually fell asleep but you couldn’t. You didn’t want to fall asleep and wake up still in this nightmare, it’d be too cruel. Besides, you were scared of passing out and waking up somewhere else entirely. At some point in the night you heard someone getting up and you quickly hid out of sight. You saw Minho walk past, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and going to the door. He unlocked it and let Chan in. The boy looked exhausted, but he was alive.

“So, what’s the verdict?” Minho questioned.

“The headmaster’s pissed that something like this happened. He wanted y/n transferred to an actual group of agents, but I argued that wasn’t a good idea right now. She should stay with us, at least for a while longer.”

“What are we supposed to do?”

“I know we can figure something out, but we’ll talk more in the morning.”

The were heading over to their rooms when Chan stopped. Despite hiding he realized you were awake, and carefully came over until you were in view.

“You should be sleeping.”

“… can’t…”

“Hm.”

Chan looked back at Minho and told him to head to bed. The boy didn’t argue and returned to his room. Once he was gone Chan’s gaze turned to you.

“Would you mind coming with me somewhere? I’m not gonna hurt you, I promise.”

You stared at Chan without giving a response, but he got up and walked away regardless. He went down another hall, leading more towards the empty rooms in the dorm. You watched him disappear out of sight. Curiosity was getting the best of you so you got up and followed him. It was probably a bad idea, but at the same time you wanted to know what he meant. You wound up seeing a door open at the end of the hall, peeking in to see Chan staring out the window. It was really late at night, and the crescent moon gave the room some light.

“Could you close the door? I’d say lock it but I doubt you want to do that.”

This was a bad idea, you were screaming at yourself in the back of your mind, yet you walked into the room and shut the door. You didn’t lock it, but stayed where you were. After a moment he walks up to you and stops right in front of you, slowly reaching over to your bandaged wrist.

“The boys messaged me about what you did, may I see?” You didn’t stop him from grabbing your arm and pulling back the bandage. “It’s nearly healed. That’s good, so why would you do such a thing?”

“Why bother living if my life is meaningless?”

“That’s not true. You can live a safe and full life here, which many others didn’t get to do. You can do things your way.”

“What do you want?”

Chan sighed. “Hit me.”

“What?”

“I can understand you’re upset and you must be feeling incredibly powerless. The first time something bad happened to you there was nothing you could do to help yourself. So this time you took matters into your own hands, and I’m sorry I had to interfere with that. You must be upset with me, so hit me. Let it all out, I won’t fight back.”

“… I’m not gonna…”

“I’m serious. The room’s far from the others, so they won’t hear anything. I can lock the door if you want as well.”

“…”

“Hit me. If you want to hurt someone, hurt me, not yourself.”

You weren’t into this idea, and kept your gaze away from Chan. He was still holding your arm, so he figured he’d encourage you. He rather playfully smacked your hand against his chest.

“Don’t wallow in your sadness, I don’t want you to drown it in. Come on, show me your claws, show me your fangs, tell me how you really feel.” Chan kept hitting himself with your hand. “I’m a bad alpha, aren’t I?”

“…” 

“I hurt you in a way many others won’t ever understand, or know. I’m no better than those bullies, am I? Didn’t need rope or drugs to hurt you, did I? Just being in your life-”

“Shut up!”

You yelled, freeing your arm and making a fist before hitting Chan in the chest. He took a half step back and coughed a bit, but he had a smile on his face.

“Good, keep going. Or else I’m not gonna shut up.”

“You think you’re so high and mighty just cause you’re an alpha! Cause you’re at the top of society!” You slammed both your fists down on Chan’s chest. “I thought we’d be equals here since we both lost our parents, but no!”

You let out a growl, feeling a tingling sensation at your fingertips and glancing down to see your claws. You stared for a moment, caught up in your own head before Chan’s words snapped you back to the moment.

“Alphas are still on top, aren’t we? We’re supposed to protect you cause you’re so help-”

“Shut up!” You clawed into his chest. “This is all your fault! If you hadn’t broken into my room and assaulted me-”

“I did not assault you.”

“Using your pheromones is the same shit! If you would have left me alone none of this would have ever happened!”

You screamed and pounced on Chan, knocking him to the floor, your claws digging into his shoulder. You could see the discomfort on his face, but he was holding back, trying not to make a sound. You dug your claws in deeper until he groaned, his eyes flashing red for a moment as he made an attempt to get you off but you bit into his arm. This time he screamed and pulled himself free. You growled and dug your claws in deeper which caused him to go still. His breathing was a bit uneven, but he stared up at you.

“Do you hate me?”

“You ruined everything! You’re worse than the bastards who bullied me! Why aren’t you dead too! Why do you get to keep living as if you did nothing wrong!”

You pulled out your claws and swiped at Chan’s face. He winced from the initial sting but he bit his tongue. His eyes flickered red for a moment, but he shut them tight.

“Look at me you monster!”

You dug your claws into his upper arms, shaking him a bit until he opened his eyes. The color was still flickering back and forth but you didn’t care. Despite the anger and yelling, tears began to build up. Your grip loosened a bit, and your panting became louder in your ears. You felt a pain in your chest, in your heart, and then the tears started sliding down your cheeks. They were silent, and a few drops fell onto Chan’s face. The red in his eyes faded to brown, and he watched you quietly.

“… I used to be able to pretend… pretend that what happened to me was… was just bad luck… that I’d be okay someday… but then you just… why’d we have to meet that day…” You rest your head against his chest, sobbing between your words. “… I can’t play pretend anymore…”

Chan reached over with his less injured arm, gently rubbing your back. He definitely had pain all over, but his priority was you.

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”

[hey-august]

Buggy thinking reader insert likes Shanks more is for ever and always gonna be one of my favorite things because the angst potential, the comfort potential… delicious.

But also like… ultimate comedy because depending on the dynamic you see him and Shanks having it can also be like: Shanks. Obnoxious wingman.

Buggy fretting over you being in love with Shanks, while not only you aren’t, but also Shanks doing his best combination of „I know all of this guys dumbest moments because we grew up together“ and „WHOOOO!!! BUGGY!!“

He wouldn’t even need to sell you on Buggy but he’s constantly just hyping him up to you anyways, Buggy is so funny. Buggy can juggle with daggers! Shanks is a hot mess in the fashion department, yes, hahah, yeah he knows, if you want to talk to someone who can tell colors apart you should go to BUGGY, now BUGGY is a stylish guy, you need to know your shit to make clown fashion look good.

…. Also speaking of clowns, one time when they were eleven Buggy got stung by a bee on his nose and it took away like fifty percent of his vision because it swelled so- „CAN IT, YOU BASTARD!“

Buggy not only being so blind he mistakes your advances as being intended for Shanks, but also not even realizing Shanks is just constantly trying to get you two closer as well.

aaaAAAHHH Anon, I love the idea of Shanks trying to be Buggy's hype man, and doing that plus more. C'mon, they're not embarrassing stories, they're funny! Endearing! Here, have a 550 word stream of consciousness about this trio's dynamic:

Both men can easily be the center of attention. But maybe Buggy's circle is intimidating. Maybe not. Maybe you're nervous about approaching him just yet.

Grab a drink, chat it up with the easy to talk to guy at the bar, get invested in some childhood story he's telling a crowd, a story full of adventure and danger. Plus some goofy antics that only two best friends could get into.

And when Shanks calls out to the so-called friend for confirmation about a particular detail (what happened first - the swarm of bees that blocked out the sun or falling into that pulsating mud pit ), it's the guy you've had your eye on all night.

And Shanks - the schmoozer, the sweet talker - is too quick to pick up on that subtle shift in your expression. Wide eyed not because of the fantastic story he's telling, but for a different reason. So you two keep chatting, and the circle of conversation shrinks until it's you two and stories about Buggy.

Finally, eventually, why did it take so long, Buggy makes his way over and Shanks introduces you two. Aaaand nothing. Buggy looks you over and scoffs. Shanks can go hook up with whoever and do whatever the fuck he wants - Buggy doesn't need a consolation prize.

That was...rude. It would have been absolutely crushing if it wasn't for Shanks clapping a hand on Buggy's shoulder and shaking sense into him. Chiding him for being so blind - how did Buggy not notice that you have been undressing him all night from across the bar? Or how you'd whip your head around and pretend to be looking anywhere but at the clown when his attention drifted anywhere near you.

It's obvious Buggy isn't going to believe any of that, so you decide to jump in. And, you know, word vomit every thought in your head.

"He's right, I think you're cute and I want to buy you a drink and he said you like hot dogs so we can go get a bite to eat, my treat, if you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, we've been talking about you because I wanted to get to you more because I...think you're cute." You might have blacked out while talking because you hardly remembered what came out of your mouth. It wasn't until the end that you realized both men were silent and staring at you.

Shanks laughed first. Of course he did. Buggy didn't. He turned red. Redder than the nose on his face. You thought it was the nicest shade of vermillion, but wow could it get brighter when this guy had emotions.

You two were talking about him? What did Shanks say?!

Only good things, really! That he's talented with knives. That he's clever with chemicals and science. Oh and one time he accidentally blew off his eyebrows. And that Buggy has the best jokes. In fact, there's one particular joke about a mermaid, a pirate, and a sandwich that no one can tell like Buggy.

And there's the light. The sparkle. The opportunity. All the pieces have been played.

Shanks drowns the rest of his drink while Buggy leans in to tell you the joke. That joke. What you didn't know is it's rather raunchy. Downright filthy. And exactly what you and Buggy needed to start a fun night getting to know each other.

[teamatsumu]

was i meant to love you? (last part)

pairing: miya osamu x reader

summary: the kanji on your arm says miya atsumu’s name. but every fiber of your being is in love with his twin brother.

word count: 1501

warnings: swearing, some angst, happy ending

tags: @hadukada @utopiamiroh @angstylittleb1tch @sassycheesecake @i-have-no-life-charlie @tsukiran-blog @mommyourcall420 @ak-aaa-li @ti-mame @ellesalazar @seijaelee @hiraethwa

a/n: this is so late im so sorry writers block is a little bitch but omg this is the last part! I hope you all like it xx

previous part // series masterlist

The living room was hardly silent, between the sitcom playing on TV and Atsumu’s incredibly loud chewing, but it still felt like the air was thick and still around you. You were sure it was just you, and not Atsumu who felt this way. It likely had to do with your apprehension, trying to prepare yourself for the topic at hand. You remembered Osamu’s words, drawing confidence from his encouragement. You tried to revise in your head how to approach this, but your bravery was failing you.

How the hell were you supposed to tell your soulmate that you weren’t in love with him?

Osamu’s platonic soulmates theory didn’t sound all too convincing to you, but hearing that it came from Kita did give you some confidence. You were sure Kita would never put forth an idea that he didn’t consider to have merit. So maybe there was some weight to his words. You were still on the fence though. It all depended on what Atsumu had to say about it.

Speaking of, you watched Atsumu slurp down his ramen like it was his last meal on earth, and you could empathize with him. His routine was grueling. A lot went into being a pro athlete, much more than you could have anticipated. You almost felt bad for springing this on him after a tiring day when he was trying to wind down. But you didn’t exactly have any other opportunity for it.

You cleared your throat and shifted in place, turning so you were facing Atsumu instead of the TV. He turned to look at you, slurping up a noodle dangling from his mouth before licking his lips and giving you a look.

“I need to talk to you about something.” You fidgeted with your fingers, unable to look him in the eye. Atsumu seemed to freeze, leaning forward to place his bowl on the coffee table before facing you and giving you his full attention. Somehow that made it harder for you to get the words out. Your mouth opened and closed like a dumb goldfish. Several moments passed.

Atsumu’s hand landed on top of your own, halting the nervous movements of your fingers. You closed your eyes, feeling a sudden wave of shame wash over you.

“Just say it.” He spoke gently, as if understanding the turmoil going on in your head. You looked up at him, at the calming brown of his eyes and the soft curl of his mouth, and you felt yourself tear up.

“You don’t deserve this.” You breathed, shaking your head. “I can’t do this to you. I’m a horrible person.”

His lip ticked up in a little smile. “Ya gotta give me more than that, babe. I have no idea what yer talkin’ about.”

“I don’t-” You felt the words pour out of you like vomit. “I don’t think I love you. Not like I should. And it’s tearing me apart because I care for you so much and Osamu told me about this thing called platonic soulmates which sounds like bullshit, I know, but it explains the way I’m feeling! But sometimes I just feel like I’m a bad person and this is my way of justifying it-”

“Wait-”

“And I do love you. So much Tsumu, you’re my closest friend and you understand me so well but I don’t feel it romantically at all, which is so fucked up-”

“Hey!” You stopped short, staring at the man before you with teary eyes. You expected him to look horrified. Maybe confused. Definitely hurt. But all you saw was amusement.

“Ya gotta cool it.” He grinned, running a hand through your hair while the other squeezed yours comfortingly.

“S-sorry.” You choked out, sniffling a bit.

Atsumu sighed, staring down at your joined hands. The moment was silent except your wet sniffles, and the very low volume of the TV playing in the background. You watched as Atsumu smiled a bit.

“I’m relieved.” He spoke up, and you blinked at his words. “I always thought I was a fuckin’ asshole, ya know? ‘Cause yer so beautiful and a great person. But kissing ya was kinda painful.”

You gasped. “Hey!”

“Yer telling me the thought of layin’ a smooch on me didn’t make ya wanna barf?” Atsumu retaliated, and you fell silent, still sneering. He chuckled a bit, shaking his head.

“What did ya say it was called?”

“Platonic soulmates.”

Atsumu hummed. “Makes sense. Yer my best friend.”

You smiled at that, squeezing his hand. “And you’re mine.”

When he opened his arms, you fell into them, reveling in his embrace. Somehow, it felt ten times better than any time you had hugged him. You figured it had to do with the fact that your chronic guilt was not bothering you anymore. You buried your face in Atsumu’s neck.

“I love ya.”

“I love you, too.”

A bout of silence.

“But not like that.”

You let out a laugh. “I get it, Tsumu.”

“Just wanted ta make it clear.”

“Shut up.”

And he did. You smiled and settled into him, feeling lighter than you had in years.

……………………

When Osamu saw the look on Atsumu’s face, he immediately froze. He knew, in that instant, that you had talked to his brother. He just knew Atsumu too well to not know any change in his demeanor. And his demeanor had definitely changed. Except it wasn’t the change he was expecting.

Atsumu looked more relaxed. Happier, even? Maybe that was going too far. But then his twin was grinning up at him and settling into a stool in front of the counter, and Osamu could no longer ignore the spring in his step.

“What’s got ya so preppy?” He tested, trying not to build up his hope. Atsumu grinned.

“I just got answers ta some really old questions.” He replied, and Osamu raised an eyebrow.

“Wanna tell me what yer talkin’ about?”

And Atsumu did, sounding jovial, and with a light tone. Osamu stayed rock still as he spoke, unable to believe that Atsumu too had felt this way his whole life. He was almost shocked that he had missed such a huge part of his brother’s feelings, but it was overshadowed by the kindling of hope in his chest at the prospect that he could actually be with the girl he loved.

So when Atsumu had stopped talking, and Osamu had served him a plate of fresh Onigiri, he worked up the courage to drop another bomb on his twin. One that was arguably worse than the Platonic Soulmates one.

“Tsumu,” he began. “What do ya think about her datin’…. someone else?”

“Hm?” Atsumu looked up at his brother. “Why? She like someone?”

Osamu nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. He finally let the words leave his mouth.

“M-me.”

Atsumu stopped eating then, eyes meeting Osamu’s. Osamu felt like he was holding his breath, heart racing.

“I like her too. Uh, it’s- I’ve liked her for a while. Didn’t do anythin’ for obvious reasons, ya know.”

Atsumu sighed, turning back to his plate. He bit into another rice ball.

“What is this? Kimchi mayo? It’s real good.”

Osamu blinked, trying to fight off his incredulity in favor of staring down his brother.

“Are ya for real?”

Atsumu rolled his eyes. “Samu, ‘m not really shocked. It’s pretty obvious ya got a thing for her. And I don’t have anything with her at all, so if ya wanna date, go ahead.”

Then he gave Osamu a lopsided grin, and Osamu felt like everything in the universe had just fallen into place.

“Ya better not break her heart though. She’s still my soulmate.”

Osamu’s smile was genuine. His relief was immense. He felt almost stupid with joy at that point. And he realized he gave Atsumu far less credit than his due. His brother had just stumped him completely, and he couldn’t be more grateful.

“I won’t.”

………………….

Your and Osamu’s first kiss wasn’t anything to write home about. It was at a train station, rushed and messy, so quick that you almost didn’t feel it. It was immediately followed by a feeling of regret, panic and guilt. Something you both wanted so bad, but couldn’t have. So forbidden that it broke your heart into pieces.

Your second kiss was the exact opposite in every single way. Everything that had broken your heart seemed to mend now. Heart and stomachs both full after the wonderful date you had just been on, when Osamu finally leaned down to press his lips on yours. It felt like every fiber of your body had been pulled taut and then released, and your hands felt shaky as you finally allowed them to run over his body. His own grip was worryingly tight, arms enveloping you completely, not that you minded. You reveled in the feeling of his mouth, hoping you never stopped kissing him. Hoping he never let you go.

The kiss did end. But he never let you go.

[darkeralmond]

Beer Pong

Luca Fantilli x fem! Reader

synopsis: the umich hockey team is holding a party at the frat house some of the players live in. luca invites you to the party because he likes you. you drink too much and he has to comfort you

warnings: fluff, underage drinking, vomit/puking

word count: 2.4k

a/n: I LOVE LUCA SM!! it sucks that i don’t see full fanfics for him, but i can live off one shots!! i have a lot of conrad requests still coming, but i want to dial down on them since i don’t want to be known for just those

masterlist | request info

Luca drank out of his beer can while talking to Luke and Johnny. “I swear Luca, you're an absolute beautician! This place looks incredible.” He had been responsible for decorating the whole house, getting multiple party games set up, and pushing the couches out of the way to create more space.

He shrugged while chuckling, “What can I say? I did it for the boys.” That’s when he looked over and saw you enter the party with your friends. You looked lost and nervous as you followed them. “I’ll be back, boys,” he said as he patted Johnny’s chest and rushed over to you.

Your friend-group watched as the male rushed over with a wide smile on his face. They had been suspecting something was going on between you, but the two of you kept denying it. “Y/N! You came!” He smiled brightly.

You looked over at him as a small smile formed on your face. “Hey!” Your friend group parted a way down the middle so you could see Luca. They looked at each other knowingly before rushing off to leave you two alone. You looked back and saw them run off. “Guys!” you yelled. You followed it up with a sigh and looked back at Luca. “Well, shit.”

Luca saw this as an open opportunity to hang out with you. “Well, you can hang out with me and my friends if you’d like,” he suggested. You knew a couple of the players on the hockey team. For example, you knew Ethan and Mark. “I’m pretty sure Adam and Nolan are about to start a game of beer pong. I could use a partner.” He nudged you with his elbow.

You giggled, faintly blushing at the small contact. “Sure.” This was the first game of beer pong you’ve played, the only time you played anything close to it was on Game Pigeon with your friends.

“You wanna get a drink before we start?” he asked as the two of you walked through the crowded hall.

You tucked some strands of hair behind your ear. “Yeah, I would like that.” He led you to the kitchen right where he left Luke and Johnny.

“Johnny! Luke! This is Y/N,” he said as he gestured to you. You sheepishly waved at the two of them.

Johnny smiled, “‘Sup, Y/N. Luca, this the girl you were talking about?”

Luca’s heart dropped when he said that. “Uh, yeah. She is.”

Your cheeks flushed at his answer. He talked about you to his teammate? Was it like bad stuff? Was it good stuff?

He nodded his head, looking back at you. “I know you from somewhere…” He stared at you for a second while squinting his eyes. “You work at that Starbucks by the barn.”

Your eyebrows furrowed as a smile slipped on your face. “The barn?”

Luke laughed, wrapping his arm around the male. He was obviously drunk. “He means do you work at the Starbucks by the Ice arena.” He laughed.

“Ohhh,” you smiled. “Yeah, I do!”

Luca then turned to you, “So we have White Claws, Coors Light, Bud Light, Whiskey, Vodka for shots, that type of stuff.”

You hummed in thought, you wanted to keep it chill since you were about to play beer pong. “I’ll just take a watermelon White Claw.” He grabbed it out of the cooler and handed it to you.

You cracked open your can and looked over at Luca. “You ready?” he asked. You nodded and followed him outside. The loud music winded down the further you got to the backyard doors. There were people in the pool and dancing around the backyard.

Adam and Nolan were standing there laughing amongst each other as you and Luca approached. Adam then turned his attention to Luca and smiled wide, “Got your partner?”

He smiled, “Yup!” He then turned to you.

You had hung out with Adam a couple times, but only with Luca. “Of course it’s Y/N,” Adam laughed then looked at Nolan. “This kid is obsessed with her.” This caused Nolan to laugh.

“I don’t think we’ve formally met, I’m your future father in law,” Nolan joked as he held out his hand. You stared at it before taking it and shaking it.

Luca’s cheeks flushed red as he attempted to laugh it off. “Dude, shut up!” He rolled his eyes. He snuck a glance at you and saw you were blushing hard.

He couldn’t make out if you were blushing because of embarrassment or if you were flustered. Whatever, that didn’t matter right now. “Let’s start!” Luca yelled, getting on your guys' end of the table.

There were 10 red solo cups filled with beer, 2 out of those 10 cups had a white ping pong ball floating in them. “I’m going against you,” Adam pointed straight at Luca.

Nolan looked at you and shrugged, “Guess I’m going against you.”

Luca grabbed one of the ping pong balls out of the cup and you grabbed the other. “You wanna go first?” he asked you.

“Uh, sure.” You looked straight ahead at the cups and stared at the one in the middle. You tossed it and it hit the rim of the cup before bouncing off the table. Nolan caught the ball and chuckled.

Luca then shot his ping pong ball and made it into one of the cups on the right end. He cheered and held up his hand for a high five. You laughed at how excited he was and accepted his high five. “Drink up!” he yelled to his brother.

Adam rolled his eyes, “Whatever.” He grabbed the cup, taking out the ball before he chugged the beer. He wiped away the liquid that spilled onto his chin with the sleeve of his hoodie and glanced over at Nolan.

Nolan tossed the ball and it landed straight into the cup in the front. He cheered loudly and gave Adam a fist bump. You got the ball out of the cup and placed the cup up to your lips.

You started chugging the beer, it burned as it went down your throat. When you finished, your face scrunched as a reaction. “Shit!” You crushed the cup and tossed it.

This won a laugh out of all the guys before Adam shot it. It landed in the cup in the middle and he whooped victoriously. Luca rolled his eyes and chugged the beer. You watched as his Adam's apple bobbed while he chugged. Weirdly, something about it was attractive. Maybe it was because he was attractive.

Luca tossed the cup and looked over at you, he caught you staring. That meant a moment of eye contact which you quickly broke. You tried to focus your mind back on the game, but it was hard. You tossed the ball, but again you missed. You muttered your breath, “Shit.”

Luca then tossed his, barely making it into the cup. “Yes!” He sprung with excitement as he held up his hand again for a high five.

You clapped your hands before accepting his high five again. “Luca’s really carrying your team over there,” Nolan teased.

You rolled your eyes, “I’m better at this on the phone!”

Luca smirked, snapping his fingers and pointing at you. “That is true.”

Nolan took a shot and scored it into the cup. He pumped his fist and smiled as Adam wrapped his arm around him, patting him on the chest. You grabbed the cup and started drinking again.

This time, you were used to the taste so it didn’t hurt as much going down. You tossed the cup aside and looked up at Luca. “I forgot to tell you,” he winced. “He’s been doing this for years. He’s a senior.”

“Well, that’s great to know.” You rolled your eyes. “At least he’s not going easy on me.”

Luca chuckled before he looked over at his brother who just let go of Nolan and got prepared to toss the ball. He squinted his eyes, assessing the target cup. He tossed it and missed it by a hair. “Fuck!” he yelled. “That should’ve gone in!”

“If there was a cup there, maybe it would’ve.” You laughed before taking a sip of your White Claw.

Nolan laughed as well, “Damn, bro! Y/N got some fire in her!”

Luca laughed as well, seeing his authentic smile made your heart do cartwheels as a smile spread on your face. You looked back at the arranged cups and focused on the one in the middle again. You tossed the ball and made it in. “Yes!” You jumped up with excitement.

“Holy shit!” Luca gasped and looked down at you. “Your first college beer pong goal!” Nolan grabbed the cup and took the ball out. He took the drink of shame while Luca hugged you. His arms held you tight before he lifted you off the ground.

“Woah! Careful!” you exclaimed while giggling. “You’re gonna crush me!”

Luca laughed and set you down. “Sorry! Sorry!”

Nolan tossed the cup aside and smiled. “Nice job,” he said.

Adam smiled, “Yeah. I’m impressed.”

You guys lost the game mostly because of Nolan. All those beers on top of the White Claw made you feel the buzz. “Luca! Let’s go do shots!” You smiled widely and grabbed his hand, dragging him inside.

When you got inside, you heard music blasting throughout the house. You lead him towards the kitchen where everyone else was.

Mark was taking shots with Ethan with your friends. Your friend, Lilah, looked over and saw you and Luca holding hands. You were clearly tipsy from the game of beer pong. “Woah, Y/N!” she laughed. “You are fucked up, how much have you drank?”

You laughed, “Well, we just lost a game of beer pong. I’m really feeling the buzz.” You looked over at Mark.

Mark was smiling wide, “Hey, Y/N.” He ran his fingers through his hair.

“Hey,” you smiled wide. “Shall we take shots?” It was tradition for you and Mark to take shots together. You guys did that at every high school party, now it was your first college shot.

He laughed, “You know it!” He poured Vodka into a shot glass and slid it over to you. “To your first college party, your first beer pong game, and your first college shot!” He held up the glass. You held up yours and clinked it against his. You then downed the shot and slammed the glass back on the table.

You let out a loud whoop in response and threw your hands up. “This is so much fun!” you cheered as you looked back at Luca. “Thank you so much for the invite.”

Luca looked down at your smile and felt his heart melt. You looked so innocent, even when you were drunk. “Yeah, of course.” He grinned, his dimples showing. He reached his arm out and wrapped it around you, pulling you closer “Anytime!”

The two of you were in the kitchen with Rutger, Dylan, and Adam. You shook your head and gagged. “Fuck,” you muttered and quickly hopped off the kitchen counter.

You rushed to a bathroom and flung the door open. You immediately slammed the door shut and hunched over the toilet. You threw up loudly, tears stinging your eyes as you continuously threw up for 10 seconds.

Finally, you stopped. You leaned back and sighed. You reached out and flushed the toilet. “Fuck…” A faint knocking was heard at the door. You yelled out, “Occupied!”

“It’s just me,” Luca’s voice was muffled.

You sighed. You looked back at the toilet as you said, “Come in.” You felt ashamed as he opened the door. You glanced over and saw him with a bottle of water.

He shut the door and sat down next to you. “How you feeling?” he asked as he ran his fingers through your hair.

His fingers grazed through your scalp gently. He looked up at your forehead before meeting your eyes again. “My head hurts, I feel hot, and I just puked my guts out.” You answered.

He chuckled, “Wait ‘til tomorrow.” You scoffed and grabbed the water from you. You took a couple sips and just chilled on the bathroom floor. “This is my fault,” he sighed. “I shouldn’t have let you drink so much.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong except not tell me Nolan was the reigning champion of beer pong,” you joked, the both of you laughing in response. You took some more sips of water.

You started gagging again. Luca quickly got up from his spot and got behind you. He held back your hair as you threw up in the toilet again. This time it wasn’t as violent, but it still was a lot. You backed up and flushed the toilet.

You wiped your mouth as you groaned loudly. He sat back down to where you could see his face. You looked over at him and frowned. “This isn’t gross to you or anything?”

“I live in a frat house with 10 other hockey players,” he laughed. “Nothing’s grosser than that.”

You laughed again. You fixated on his pearly whites, those were rare for hockey players. “Luca,”

you said in a low voice. “This is why I like you. You know how to make me feel better.”

He shrugged, “What can I say? I’m a professional people pleaser”

After a few minutes, your stomach settled and you felt a little tired. “Hey, Luca?” you said as you looked over at him. His head perked up, he transferred his gaze over to you as his eyebrows raised. “Do you wanna… maybe… I don’t know, find a breakfast spot tomorrow?”

He smiled, “Like a date?”

Your cheeks turned bright red. “I don’t know, maybe.” Your heart started beating faster. If it wasn’t for the amount of alcohol you drank, you would’ve never asked him out. He made you feel comfortable by protecting you and making sure you were fine. This made you feel vulnerable.

He nodded and placed his hand on yours. “I’d love to do it.” His voice was so quiet that you could barely hear it over the sound of the music.

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[5:57 pm]

(cw: celebrity!reader)

Was this restaurant too fancy? Had Jungwoo chosen the right place to eat? Was it obvious he was sweating? He took a deep breath, he was no going to let his nerves make him sick- again.

This was the day, weeks and weeks of playing it cool came to this. He was taking his childhood celebrity crush out on a date! This was something that only ever happened in his dreams, and only since he was 9 years old.

You'd been in the spotlight almost all your life. You started on some children's TV shows which is where Jungwoo first discovered you, then you progressed into some music, but you really took off as a teen and adult in more serious acting roles.

He had never imagined that a night of chugging beers and drunkenly sending you an Instagram DM would have resulted in you agreeing to go out with him. He was nervous, meeting you in person is a big deal. The whole private room of the restaurant had to be booked for just the two of you just to prevent fans or cameras from catching sight of the two of you.

But now Jungwoo was starting to wonder if maybe that was a personal preference of yours. A quirk that came with so many years in the spotlight. Maybe you didn't like to eat around normal people. He panicked, what if you were rude to waitstaff because they were "beneath" you? What if you sent back your food because it wasn't to your usual gourmet standards? What would he do? How could he deal with the fact that the person he'd had a crush on for over half his life was rude?

The door open and his head snapped over, stopping his internal panic. You came in quietly, bowing slightly to the employee that held the door open to you with a polite smile before you looked at Jungwoo, "Hi! It's so good to finally see you, I hope I didn't keep you waiting long."

His mouth opened and shut with no sound a few times, "Uh- um- ehhh- no. No. Sorry, no. No, I haven't been waiting long. Is it- can I greet you with a hug or do you not like people touching you?"

You waved him off, shrugging out of your sweater, "it's fine. We are on a date after all."

You gave him a warm embrace before taking a seat across from him and looking over the menu. You both made small talk and you laughed at all his stupid, word vomit jokes.

You smiled at all the staff that came by, never faltering even when every single cook, bus boy, waiter and hostess came and got their pictures with you. You thanked everyone of them for their support and signed whatever they put in front of you, even one of the cook's shoes. You thanked the cooks for their work and delicious food and Jungwoo was not ashamed to say his crush grew even bigger. 

He was having a hard time containing his excited squeals when you talked about your shared interests and what you did in your free time. You spent a lot of time with your past schools, volunteering, and spending time with the elderly where your grandparents lived. 

When your final plates were cleared you looked at Jungwoo with a shy but genuine smile, "I'm glad we came out. I haven't been on very many dates, but this is the best one. I hope we can do it again..."

Jungwoo would not even be ashamed to say his mouth opened and shut like a fish out of water, again, "you want to go out with me again?"

Your eyes widen and Jungwoo’s heart breaks when sadness fills your eyes, “Do you not want to? I’m sorry for assuming, you don’t have to.”

He panics, “I do! Yes, I want to go out with you again! Please!”

[siriuslylu]

constellation - wolfstar microfic - word count: 2055

Remus entered the room looking down, deep in thought.

“Moony! What’s with the face?” asked James, he got to the room a little bit before him and was heading to his bed.

Remus looked at him, really looked, James, one of his best friends, gigantic heart, patient like no one else, he was always on the front line for his friends, always a kind word, a soft look, a good ear. Figured if he could talk to anyone, it’d be him, and found out he was actually itching to get it out of his system.

So, he sighed and walked his way.

“Prongs, actually, can I talk to you for a minute? Where you going somewhere?”

“Oh, sure Moons! I was looking for my gloves before heading to the Quidditch field, but it’s only me practicing so I got time, what’s up?”

He took a moment, he was actually gonna do it, it seemed easier in his head, but right now, he felt suddenly nervous. James encouraged him to sit on the bed with him.

“Well? What’s on your mind?”

“Prongs, I-“, he licked his lips.

His friend frowned, “Remus, should I worr-“

“IlikeSirius”

A moment of silence.

“What?”

He took a deep breath again, closing his eyes and sighed heavily while opening them

“I… I like Sirius”

“O…kay? Me too?”

“No, Prongs… I… like him. As in… I’m a little bit in… love with him”

“You… WHAT?!”

He panicked, has it been a mistake? Should he backtrack and say it was a joke?

Seeing Remus’ face, James hurried to clarify

“Wait, no, I, sorry Moons, I didn’t mean to be rude, it just… took me by surprise I guess, umm, wanna tell me a bit more?”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t all lost, he could do it.

“I don’t really know when… I just…” he couldn’t find the words, hasn’t thought this far through honestly, and what exactly did he feel for his friend? How could he explain? “I really don’t know when it changed, one day he was just my friend, the next day I realised I was somehow upset? whenever I saw him with girls or whatever, figured it was because I didn’t want him to spend less time with us, and then, suddenly one day, I saw hip applying lip balm and thought ‘huh, how would it feel to kiss the strawberry off his lips?’ And stilled, because you just don’t think things like that about your friends; after that it all went down, I saw him everywhere all the time, and it… it wouldn’t stop, every normal thing he did was suddenly huge, I couldn’t stop staring at him, watching his hands gesticulate when he talked, his cheeky smile when he thought of a prank, the length of his bloody eyelashes, it was so frustrating, I started to blush whenever I heard him laugh, I think I’m going insane” he looked up to find his friend gaping at him with wide eyes “oh, sorry, I guess it was too much?”

James got out of his trance and looked at him softly smiling that warm James Potter smile “no Moons, not too much, just surprised you… felt that way, I can see you really need to get it out”

“I feel like vomiting, both literally and figuratively, are you… weirded out?”

He saw his friend think for a moment before shaking his head

“No, not really” he frowned a bit and relaxed “it actually makes sense, you two are very close, I know how people usually feel about umm queerness, but you’re my friend Moony” he grabbed his hand and squeezed it “you’re my best friend, how could I be weirded out by you? I know you, it’s not typical, yeah, but who am I to tell someone who should or shouldn’t fancy or love?”

Remus sighed again, he felt a huge backpack off his shoulders “thanks Prongs, you’re an amazing friend, you knew that?”

He saw him shrug confidently “so I’ve been told” and looked at him again in that soft way he had reserved for his friends “Moony, are you going to tell him?”

And there it was, his biggest fear, she shook his head sadly

“No, I don’t think so, how would you feel if suddenly your guy best friend confessed?”

“I don’t know, but I wouldn’t want him suffering in silence, I mean, I’d prefer to know I guess”

“Is not that easy, I don’t wanna ruin our friendship”

“You don’t think he can feel the same way?”

He snorted, yeah sure, as if Sirius Black could like him

“No way, first of all, have you seen how many girlfriends he’s had? And second of all, have you seen me?”

That put a deep defensive frown in his friend’s face

“What do you mean have I seen you? What’s wrong with you?”

“How much time do you have” he said rolling his eyes

“Moony, you’re amazing, and handsome, even I can admit that, don’t think so low of you”

“Well, still, I don’t think he likes blokes so…”

“Have you asked him?”

“Of course not”

“Then?”

He sighed “it’s… complicates Prongs, I’d rather keep his friendship intact, I really don’t know how could he react or what he could think of me”

“Give him more credit, he wouldn’t push you off”

“It’s easy to say when the feelings are not towards you”

A moment of silence, then James broke it looking at him

“Okay Moons, tell me then”

“What?”

“Whatever you want to, everything, take it off your chest, tell me everything you feel about him, what would you tell him if you could”

“That might really freak you out”

“It won’t, I promise, you need to let it out”

A moment

“Okay, I-“ he felt suddenly a bit shy, but he stared at his hands, it’d be just like talking to his journal, he thought, James was giving him the space he needed and maybe it’d help him, maybe if he wasn’t full of it he could actually look at Sirius and not feel like a ticking bomb. “You know summer evenings? When you’re just laying on the grass watching the water in the lake as still as it can get, feeling the warm breeze caress your hair, the last rays of sunshine in your face? Right in that golden hour when everything’s at peace, when the world stops for a minute and you feel the happiest you’ve ever been and will ever be, that nothing can go wrong and life is wonderful?”

“Yeah”

“That’s how I feel when I look at him, he feels like a summer evening every time I see him smile, I feel like I could do everything in life if say or do something that makes him laugh, like I’d trade everything I own for him to throw his head back and explode in laughter without other care in the world, he feels… safe, like home, like I could sleep in the curves of his curls. Watching his eyes go from blue to gray in cold days is like getting to know the best kept secret, I could trace by memory every mole, I could chart all his freckles and create the most beautiful constellations, I could listen to him talk about anything and everything like he’s my favourite record, I- as you can see I can become the sappiest idiot, I swear, the girls wouldn’t rival me” he chuckled.

A minute and he looked up to find James looking at him with the saddest smile.

“Moons…” he said in a whisper “that’s… you’re… that was beautiful. Are you absolutely sure he wouldn’t feel the same way?”

He opened his mouth to refute again, when the wardrobe door beat him, opening slowly. Everything stilled, the world paused, he was pretty damn sure even time stopped, because there, inside, was Sirius Black himself, looking fragile, face unreadable full of feelings, Remus thought he was going to die right then and there, he could barely speak

“Si-Sirius, I-“

A hand on halt and he closed his mouth instantly, next to him James held his breath

“Padfoot? What were you doing there?”

“Did you… mean all that?” Said ignoring James and holding Remus’ gaze

“I-“

“Did you?” Said hurriedly

There was no point in lying now, cards where on the table apparently, and if he was lucky, at least he might even instead of losing

“I- Yes Sirius I- I meant all of it” said closing his eyes “but you don’t- please I can’t-“ he opened them up again and grew wide when he saw tears in the corner of his friends eyes “Siriu-“

“I would…”

Silence

“I would feel the same way… just so you know”

“You… what?”

A chuckle

“I didn’t think you could feel the same way I did”

“You…?!”

“Padfoot you like Moony back?” Asked James excitedly, both friends looked at him then and he felt out of place “oh I umm, sorry, got carried away, of course you can talk about it without me here, I’ll just, uh, go” he went for the door when he heard Sirius calling

“Prongs”, as he turned, a pair of gloves flew to him, caught them just in time, “I was actually hiding to scare you the moment you came looking for them, I was about to jump when moony came in.

“Oh” he snorted, “well, thanks, I’ll be on the field if you guys need me, yeah?”

“Sure pal”

James left the room and suddenly, the air thickened

“Remus, look at me?”

He did, and oh he was doomed, those eyes held the entire universe in them

“Moony, my Moony” Sirius approached carefully and sit on the spot James left “how… how long?”

Remus took a breath “I really don’t know… Way too bloody much though” he chuckled “you… you really…?”

“Yes”, no hesitation

“How? When? How? I mean…”

Sirius shrugged, “I don’t know, I guess since the beginning but I didn’t notice until we grew up a bit more, I always found you handsome but… liking you? A while ago, I wanted to be with you all the time, and you’re the first one I wanna show a new song, or talk about my day, I think of you every time there’s chocolate cauldron and save one up in case you get late for lunch, it’s happened since forever. I just didn’t think you….”

“Yes”, his turn to be firm about it

A minute

“Could you really map a constellation from my freckles?”, Sirius joked, because of course he could

“I can”

“Show me”

“Well”, he started drawing lines in his face, slowly, softly, actually enjoying the fact that he could touch him this intimately “it starts with this one here, under your eye, right to this one on the top of your nose, up to the bigger one on your cheekbone, and back to the centre of your lower lip”

He stopped there for a second, and when he was about to move away, Sirius kissed his finger softly, Remus’ breath hitched as he looked at him, then Sirius grabbed his hand, opening it fully and kissing it

“Moony”

And that was it, he wasn’t about to wait any longer, Remus cradled his face, got closer but stopped an inch away, looking into Sirius eyes for something that’d stop him, he couldn’t find anything, just saw him closing his eyes and a second later the distance there was left.

Kissing Sirius Black felt like nothing he’s ever experienced before, his lips were soft and moved carefully around his, felt him open his mouth, and the moment he tasted his tongue knew there was no going back, he’d never feel this again with anyone, it was as if a supernova exploded in his chest, he felt like crying, and laughing, and breathing, and dying and living all at the same time, actually, he was probably doing all of it.

They separated a little bit, Sirius moved forward again and pecked him, and pecked him, and pecked him again, as if making sure it was real, Remus giggled and pecked him back, just because he could, and when their eyes met, they smiled

“If I’m your summer evenings, to me, you’re the rest of the days and nights”

And oh, he loved summer

———

English is not my first language, so please forgive grammar mistakes, also idk if 2000 words count as “microfic” lol but thanks for reading 🌻