#like idek if someone will be willing to read this

[wprowers]

i want to talk about sonic boom characters.

Long post warning.

First of all i would like to say that i really enjoy sonic boom !! I think it has a really healthy and silly humor that for me it's always welcome, so i like this show and its characters. But don't take my opinion as something biased bc i don't really think it is, i can't be biased towards a piece of media that holds little to no value to the true canon mainline games.

I have seen people dragging this show to hell, and at the time it came out it recieved a LOT of criticism for VALID reasons, valid when it comes to comparing them to the actual canon personalities of these characters (which varies from media to media but its mostly the same concept, but you can't say they haven't fucked up in the characterization of certain characters in mainline games but thats for another day).

But neither sonic or amy or tails or whoever in boom actually have any meaning at all, do they have a backstory? a purpose? any serious fight? is eggman even their enemy? Absolutely not!!

BECAUSE THIS SHOW IS NOT MEANT TO TAKEN SERIOUSLY !!

If we are talking about knuckles, he is not smart !! he doesn't have a life mission to protect the emerald !! There's nothing going on for him !! he doesn't even remember anything, in one episode he suddenly realized he didn't have a family and started to look for one, getting manipulated into an "evil" complot and that's he most arc he has ever gotten in boom (found family trope at the end of the ep, rlly cute)

And i did see some worries about the franchise being influenced by the boom! characterization. Mostly for knuckles and amy.

As for knuckles i think that some of you watched the scu shortfilm and immediately thought that they were bringing boom!knux into the mix, i disagree wholeheartedly with this (if s3 comes out and it is like that well then...) i think that scu!knux is just someone who gets represented by his pure heart (as every good representation of knuckles) and lack of knowledge of his surroundings and the people who came into his life. He gets easily manipulated and doesn't know what icecream is, bc he has been a loner for so long !! and he does not know earth, that does not mean he's stupid in any way, and i dont think that's what they would go for in s3.

And for Amy I've seen the discourse that boom! generated around her, some claiming that it was the best amy, for her not overly girly attitude maybe or for the fact that her affection towards sonic was hidden and she didn't show it at all, even though it was stated that she liked him.

So I've seen people saying that due to this amy being well received, it has influenced on how they made her in modern media, which i don't think is that much of a true tbh??? Like besides twitter takeovers, i haven't seen much of boom!amy influence in any other thing, perhaps yes they took a different take for her in frontiers or other modern games, but she has always been true to what really her character is, sonic or not Amy is Amy. Its not about how they made boom! canon suddenly but what is the path they want her character to take while she is still connected to her emotions and love for sonic and everyone.

And no i don't think boom!amy is the best version of amy, i don't think any boom! character is the best version of themselves and they will never be, because there is nothing that conveys their true selves in this interpretation, so it's impossible for these characters to be that.

LETS NOT EVEN TALK ABOUT BOOM!SHADOW because that boy is not shadow at all, then again this is a character that suffered a lot of misinterpretations from his own creators so,,,

So im not making really any point in here?

just simply stating the obvious !! sonic boom is a show that you watch to have fun ! it does not have any action or true emotional moments, never has the team gone through a serious situation. You watch it because it's silly and you don't expect much else from it! Everyone is loveable in their own way if you look at them with the right eyes, so maybe you could enjoy this show without thinking about how out of character most things are.

love you sonic boom i will always defend you

[yellowbrokenblue]

The Club - Part Two

Maya returns to the club to see Harry, unaware that his friend would also be waiting there for her…

Harry x Niall x OC

read part one here

cw: smut, oral, degrading, threesome, idek all u need to know is this is the filthiest thing i’ve ever written thank me later

Harry didn’t stop watching the club entrance. His eyes were glued to the door all night, and since he’d been here, he had asked the bouncer at least three different times if she had arrived yet.

But it wasn’t until 11pm he noticed her, the same blonde bouncy curls shining under the dim lights. He couldn’t wait to have her again.

“That’s her?”

Harry turned to his left, where his friend was sat in a booth, with a glass of whiskey clutched in his hand.

“Yeah. Maya, her name is.”

“She’s hot.” 

“Uh, huh.”

He stood up and weaved his way through the crowd of people towards her, his hand grabbing her waist from behind as soon as he reached her.

“You told me you’d be here an hour ago.” Harry said into her ear, startling her with his presence. “You’re late.”

“Harry.” She breathed, turning around to face him.

“Maya.” He replied.

 A mere 24 hours ago they were stood in the same place on the same dancefloor while he fucked her with his fingers, and as much as he’d love to repeat last night’s event, Harry had other plans for her tonight. 

He took a step closer to her, his lips brushing over her ear.

“You look so good, Maya.” He said, “This little bralette and your short skirt.”

He smirked, hearing a small whimper escape her lips.

“Did you get dressed up for me?” He asked, “All for me?”

“All for you, Harry.”

Harry breathed her in, closing his eyes as he inhaled the scent of her and her perfume. He couldn’t wait to have her again; he didn’t plan on wasting any time.

“We’re doing things a little different tonight.” Harry said, “I don’t do this with everyone.”

“What is it?”

Harry smirked.

“There’s someone I need you to meet before we can get started.”

He led her over to the booth, adjusting his pants as he walked. The anticipation had reached his dick.

They reached the table, where Harry’s friend was sat waiting for them, his eyes following Maya as she walked. Harry gestured for her to sit in the booth first, and he slid in next to her.

“Maya, this is my good friend Niall.” He said, placing a hand on her bare thigh. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Maya. Harry has told me about you.” He said, in a thick irish accent, “He’s told me what a good girl you are.”

“Oh,” Harry said, squeezing her thigh, “A real good girl.”

Maya looked between the two men sat with her. They were probably the two most attractive men she’d ever seen in her life, and they were both staring her down like they wanted to completely devour her.

Her lips parted, with another small whimper.

“D’you mind if I share you with Niall tonight, gorgeous? I can’t always keep a pretty little thing like you to myself all the time.”

“Share?” She questioned, “You both…?”

“We both want you, Maya.” Niall said, “Do you want us?”

Her panties were soaked just from looking at both of them. She wanted to moan just from their words.

She nodded in reply to them.

“I wanna hear you say it, baby.” Harry said, “Tell us you want us.”

“I want you.” She said to Harry, before turning to Niall, “Both of you.”

“’Atta girl.” Harry grinned. 

Mayas attention turned to Niall as he began to speak.

“Now, Harry got you last night, but I haven’t had you at all.” He said, smirking, “So I’d like some proof that you want me, Maya. Show me how much you want us.”

Confusion spread over her face, but she wanted them both so badly she was willing to do pretty much anything.

“Do you want me to…” She gestured towards his pants.

Niall chuckled, “No, honey.”

“Niall likes his girls to work for it.” Harry interrupted.

“Work for it?”

“Yes.” Niall said, “We’re gonna stay here, at this booth, until you make yourself cum, and then Harry and I will give you whatever you want.”

“Have you made yourself cum before?” Harry asked. “You’ve touched yourself before?”

She nodded, “I haven’t made myself cum before…”

“You can do it,” Niall said, “And then we’re all yours.”

Maya reached for her skirt, hiking it up as far up her hips as they could go, before sliding her panties all the way down her legs, taking them off completely.

Feeling brave, she lifted the panties off the floor and placed them on the table. Both of their jaws clenched.

Maya felt their eyes on her as her hand slowly crept towards her dripping wet pussy. She was soaking for them, and Niall and Harry both knew it from the state of the panties she had placed on the table.

The let out a soft moan as she ran a finger through her folds, before reaching her clit. The fact she was in a club with hundreds of other people didn’t even bother her in this moment, all she wanted was to please the two guys next to her.

“Look at her, Niall. Moaning already.” Harry said, “She’s so desperate for us she’s gonna jerk herself off just cause we asked her too.”

“So compliant.” Niall said, “So needy.”

Two of her fingers slowly circled her clit, applying the right amount of pressure for her to moan at her own touch.

“That’s it, Maya.” Harry said, “Keep going.”

“Oh!” Maya groaned, her fingers speeding up.

“Do you feel good, Maya?” Niall asked, “Do you feel good touching yourself? Do you feel good with your fingers in your cunt?”

“Uh, huh.” She moaned, her hips bucking against her own fingers.

She wasn’t close yet, and if she wanted these men to fuck her then she was going to have to make herself cum. In another attempt, she took her other hand and tried to mimic Harry’s actions yesterday, pushing two of her own fingers into her entrance, and pumping them in and out as fast as she could.

“Oh, she’s desperate, Ni, you gotta see this.” Harry said, gesturing for Niall to move next to Maya. “She got two hands going now.”

Niall sat next to her, his dick rock hard as he watched her touch herself.

“Are you imagining Harry’s cock inside ya right now, imagine him filling you up?”

She nodded, desperately throwing her head back as she cried out.

“I’m close.” She said, “I’m so close.”

“Keep going.” Harry said, “Cum for us, baby.”

“I can’t.” She cried, “Not without you, Harry.”

“Yes you can, Maya. Just keep those fingers moving in your pretty little pussy. Niall and I are right here for whatever you want when you finish.”

“Oh!” She moaned, her clit pulsing with the pressure.

“How ‘bout I have a little taste of that pussy of yours later,” Niall said into her ear, his voice sending a shiver down your spine, “And maybe you can suck Harry off while I’m doing it.”

“Does that sound good, Maya?” Harry asked, “You ready to be a dirty little whore for us?”

Harry’s words seemingly were all she needed to tip her over the edge. Her orgasm came crashing down on her, and she cried out both of her names as she came. She rested her head against Nialls shoulder, regaining her breath.

“Oh, you’re as good a girl as Harry told me.” Niall said, “Can’t wait to try you out.”

Harry grinned, wrapping his arm around her waist and shuffling closer, his mouth moving to her neck. Niall smirked at his actions, and done the same, both men attacking either side of her neck.

Her cunt was aching for them, all she wanted was for them to wreck her. She didn’t care what the done to her she just wanted them so bad that it hurt.

She moaned as they sucked on her skin, and Harry grabbed her hand, pressing it against his crotch.

“Need you get you upstairs, baby. I need you to sort this out for me.” He said.

“Take off your skirt though.” Niall said, “It’s dark, no one’s gonna pay attention. But I wanna see that cute little naked ass climb the stairs.”

“That’s barely a skirt, Niall.” Harry said, “Our dirty little slut dressed in barely anything because she wants to fuck us so bad.”

“What’s upstairs?” She asked, as Harry slipped his fingers under the waistband of her skirt, pulling it down off of her legs.

“I got a room up there. Nothin’ special, just where Niall and I like to fuck pretty girls.”

The three of them left the booth, and Mayas legs were shaking so much with anticipation that she barely made it to the staircase. Harry took her by the hand, leading her upstairs, and Niall pinched her ass, grinning as they approached the bedroom.

“Get your shirt off.” Harry said, “Bra too. There’s too much we want to do to you, we’re not wasting any time.”

“C’mon, c’mon, Harry.” Niall teased, “Take it slow, take it slow. I haven’t even kissed the girl yet.”

Without warning, Nialls lips were on Mayas. He tasted of the whiskey he’d been drinking, but smelled of expensive cologne. His fingers were tangled in her hair when she felt Harry come from behind, sliding his hands around her waist, kissing down the back of her neck.

Her aching cunt was screaming to be fucked, and her hips absentmindedly bucked against Nialls, grinding against his erection.

He pulled back, smirking.

“Someone’s eager, hm?” He questioned, in which Maya responded with a nod, “Get on the bed then, on your hands and knees.”

“Thought you were gonna eat her sweet little pussy out?” Harry questioned.

“I change my mind. I need my cock in her.”

“I’m gonna fill you up with my cum, baby girl, and you’re gonna suck Harry’s fat cock while I watch it drip out of you.”

She swallowed, her big eyes looking up at the two men.

“You heard him,” Harry said, “On the bed, Maya.”

She climbed up onto the bed, crawling on her hands and knees.

“Aw, look at her, Niall.” Harry said, “Her pussy is fuckin’ dripping for us.”

Harry pulled his pants off, along with his briefs, letting his erection spring free before kneeling in front of Maya on the bed.

“You think you can take it?” Harry asked, “Daddy’s big cock in your mouth?”

She nodded, eagerly.

“Let me make you feel good,” She begged, reaching for his dick.

“Not yet, baby. Not till I watch the look on your face when Niall shoves his dick all the way up your pretty little body. Wanna watch you.”

Taken by surprise, Niall was already positioned behind her. He quickly lined his cock up with her entrance, and pushed himself all the way in.

She screamed with ecstasy, the feeling of his dick all the way inside her making her feel pleasure she’d never felt before.

“So fuckin’ tight.” Niall said, “Your pussy feels so good on my dick, Maya. Taking it like a good little whore.”

She moaned as he pulled almost all the way out of her, before quickly thrusting inside of her again.

“Can’t wait to fill you up with my cum.” He moaned.

Maya groaned, her head looking upwards to look at Harry. Their eyes met and she moaned.

Niall’s thrusts became faster, Mayas mouth wide open as she took him.

“Get Harry’s dick in your mouth, Maya.” Niall said through a moan, “I want him to cum in your mouth the same time I cum in your cunt.”

Maya wasted no time listening to Nialls demands, and reached for Harry’s dick, taking the tip in her mouth.

“All the way, Maya. You can’t take me.” Harry said.

Harry came closer to her, forcing his cock further down her throat. She moaned as it hit the back of her throat, holding back a gag.

“Oh, Maya. Your mouth feels so fuckin’ good.” Harry moaned.

With hollow cheeks, her lips pressed tightly on his dick, his hips bucking forwards as she sucked him off.

Maya was ridiculously close to an orgasm, struggling to concentrate on anything, but she knew Harry was close to finishing. Niall fucked rough, and she wasn’t going to be able to hold on for much longer.

“Don’t worry, Maya.” Harry said, “I got it from here, you done such a good job, baby. Now let me watch as you cum all over Nialls cock.”

She dropped Harry’s dick from her mouth, and allowed herself to be ruthlessly fucked by Niall. She screamed their names over and over until she snapped.

The most mind-blowing, insane orgasm of her life washed over her, soaking Nialls cock with her cum.

“Look at me when you’re cumming, Maya. I want to see you.” Harry said in front of her.

Their eyes met, Mayas mouth hanging open as cum dripped from her pussy.

She moaned, her body falling limp and her head crashing into the bed as she rode out the last of her high.

Niall continued to thrust into her, his hips bucking against her until he came inside of her, moaning as his cum filled up her pussy.

The three lay on the bed, catching their breath, for a few minutes.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, baby.” Harry said. “We can’t have a pretty thing like you looking all messed up like this.”

“But Harry,” Maya said with big eyes, “I haven’t had your cock yet.”

Harry swallowed. Her smudged eyeliner, her swollen lips… He was down bad.

“I want you to fuck me up.”

masterlist kofi

[withleeknow]

fold.

pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: established relationship, fluff; cursing, unedited lol word count: 0.9k note: idek what this is lol i just wrote this to get the brain wiggles out 🤣

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation › masterlist › ko-fi

“You’re banishing me to the couch because of a little prank?”

“Because it wasn’t funny! God, you’re such an asshole.”

“It was!” Fucking hell, Minho is still laughing. “Babe, you should’ve seen your face.”

You hold up your big fluffy pillow to hit your boyfriend over the head, though he dodges it easily. "Piss off to the couch!"

“For real?” he asks, scanning your face with his big eyes, his brows raising annoyingly. “Sure you wanna sleep alone tonight? You're serious?”

“As a fucking heart attack,” you huff angrily, wildly kicking your feet at his legs under the sheets. “Out!”

“You’re so cute. You know you always fold, right?” he coos, eyes crinkling with mirth as he raises his hands, seemingly trying to hold your cheeks in his palms. “At least give me a kiss before I go.”

It only sharpens your dagger glare, and before Minho knows what’s even happening, he’s yeeted from the bed to the floor, rubbing the sore spot on his butt that you just kicked and sent him flying off the mattress.

“Ow! Fine, I’m leaving. See you in a couple hours."

Thirty minutes later, your phone lights up with a message, Minho’s screen flashing on your screen like an omen. You frown when you reach for the device on your nightstand, the furrow between your brows only deepening as you read the words Attachment: 2 Images.

Your finger hovers over the notification, clearly curious, but you know your boyfriend too well to be that naive.

There’s a 76% chance that he just sent you something scary that he got from the internet, which you think would be a stupid thing to do, considering that you’re “mad” at him.

But then again, he’s already on the couch. Maybe he’s got nothing left to lose.

Damn that man.

You shake your fist in the direction of the door, even though he can’t see you, before you decide to just get it over with and pop open his messages.

Hmm.

It’s nothing. No jumpscares, no scary photos of ghosts or ghouls or anything of the likes.

It’s only a couple selfies of him lying on the couch this very second, just a few footsteps away from your bedroom door, hugging his pillow with a content look on his face.

The first thing you do is save the photos to your designated Minho album, because even though you’re “mad” at him, he still looks cute with his stupid Snow filters and bunny smile, his gleaming eyes and-

Oh.

You see what this is.

Ass.

He’s banished, but he’s still pushing it, trying to show you just how much he seems to be loving it out there.

You huff out yet another annoyed breath. What on earth are you going to do with him? That’s a question you ask yourself every day.

In the end, you only reply to him with the middle finger emoji before you put your phone on the nightstand again.

You turn away from the device and snuggle further into your bed, willing sleep to come find you but you have to admit that it’s hard. It’s not because you’re scared or anything, you’re just used to sleeping next to someone.

No, not just anyone.

Only Minho.

You’re so used to sleeping next to Minho that now the bed feels infinitely empty without his warmth next to you, all over you.

Rationally, you know he’s right there in the living room - you can still hear him every time he paddles to the kitchen to get some water - and you’re clearly not strong enough to leave him on the couch for more than one night.

Actually, he has never been banished for a full night. Hell, his timeout on the couch has always ended much earlier than you’d like. Your boyfriend was right. You always fold. Pathetically quickly too.

You toss and turn for another while before you hear his unabashed giggles from the living room, light and relaxed, over the echoes of dramatic music. He must have put on a scary movie.

With your eyes closed, you listen to the sounds of make-believe doors slamming, floorboards creaking, a blood-curdling scream here and there. You’re still as wide awake as you were earlier, when Minho popped up from underneath the sheets, wearing a fucking Chucky mask just as you were getting into bed.

The idea of having his arms around you gets more appealing by the minute. You know you would be out like a light within seconds if he was holding you.

With both palms gripping the pillow beneath your head, you let out one last irritated exhale. Fuck it. This was a losing game from the start and you were all too aware of it.

You paddle out of your bedroom on light footsteps and into the enemy’s territory. When you’re in front of the couch, Minho calmly pauses the movie on the TV before he peers up at you with innocent eyes.

You hold out a hand wordlessly. This isn’t your first rodeo, and it sure as hell won’t be your last, as much as it pains you to admit it.

“Told you,” he titters, checking his phone for the time before he takes your hand in his. “You lasted 58 minutes. So close. Almost made it a full hour.”

You roll your eyes, though your body instantly relaxes now that you’re touching him in some way. He turns off the TV, grabs his phone and pillow, then waddles the both of you back into your cozy bedroom.

Your friends were right when they said they'd never seen anyone fold so quickly.

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 02.11.2023]

[littledollll]

Last kiss

Lucifer Morningstar x reader

A/n: idek. I wrote this 2 nights ago while having a breakdown for absolutely no reason 😭

As always thanks to @pebbleswritessometimes for inspecting it through and screaming at me in the writing of this.

Warnings: breakups, there’s absolutely no comfort only hurt. That’s about it.

____________________________________

“I don’t understand..” your voice barely above a whisper as you looked at them, ever the dramatic single tear falling from your eye, trailing down your cheek. Afraid to come to terms with the plain truth. Afraid to hear their explanation and have it make sense.

“I have nothing to explain. I am telling you, this can no longer be your home, I can no longer be your person.” Their emotionless expression killed you the most. The dismissive and plain tone in their voice. Like it was a simple thing to say and wave off to continue on with their day. It made your heart clench, tears burn in your eyes, that impossible to get rid off burn in your throat trying to hold back the embarrassing sobs that would eventually escape you. There would be no stopping it, but you could at least hold back.

To some degree Lucifer truly hoped you would just walk away. Be more angry than upset and not stay around hoping for more only to get more hurt. They hoped you didn’t care enough to ask or be so heartbroken about it. But of course, that was impossible. You knew that, they knew it too.

They could read you like a book. See you swallow dryly and dart your eyes away from them as if it killed you to look at them any longer.

It did.

And how Lucifer wished to wipe that stray tear away along with all your pain and heartbreak. So they turned their back to you, not willing to see you hurt any longer. Looking at anything that would serve as some sort of distraction form the oddly guilty feeling plaguing their mind, twisting their gut, a sadness and sympathy The Devil wasn’t known for. A side you were the one to uncover. And one you seemed to be on the road to never be seeing again.

“So I'm just supposed to go? You dismiss me and I walk away like all your other subjects?” Your tone raised bit by bit as you talked. Anger seeping into your voice, but more so, confusion. “Don’t I deserve some kind of explanation?”

They couldn’t look at you either, you noticed.

The shake in your voice, the deep breath you had to take for every sentence, the inevitability of your eyes shining with tears and turning slightly red. Lucifer can imagine your brows furrowed in hurt. They can see the mental image of you anxiously shifting the weight of your body from one foot to the other, your hands at the height of your stomach fidgeting with your rings.

They know you. Every curve and scar, every freckle in your body. They could draw you from memory with their eyes closed. They could guess what you were up to from a room away, they don’t have to look at you to see you hurt. They don’t want to look at you and admit it’s their fault.

“An explanation would do you no good, my darling.” Lucifer spoke softly as they started. almost anxiously pacing around the room, their back still turned and you wondered what could possibly deserve their attention more than you in this moment. The use of the petname killed you even more. In some part of your mind you were convinced this had to be some kind of joke, or something happened, something terrible and they’re protecting you.

They are.

They have to be.

Lucifer would never do this to you. Your Lucifer would never do this. You know them too. You recognize the slightest quiver in their voice. You know why they refuse to look at you too. You saw the smallest twitch of their hand as they refrained from wiping away that stray tear. And so you listened.

Because there has to be a reason. And they would eventually come back to you, right? It 's Lucifer. If there’s someone in this universe to know where to find you it’s them.

“Don’t leave me like this.” A plea. Refusal. Denial. But you knew that was it. You couldn’t fight it any more than you already had. Lucifer’s word was always final. But that meant their ‘ I love you’ s were all true. That had to mean there was hope. They turned with a slight tilt of their head and a sad smile.

“It’s not forever..” they murmured softly as they walked towards you, at such a painfully slow pace. And you actually breathed for the first time. Because their voice was so much softer. It was real. There was no mask, there was no lie. There was pain. “But you have to go.”

Lucifer’s hands cupped your cheeks so gently and they finally looked at you. You looked at each other. “You are and will forever be my heaven.” You couldn’t even cry anymore. There was no pain to be felt when they held you so tenderly. It was reassurance, it was love.

You stood speechless and in denial. They stood vulnerable, able to fall apart just as easily as you, but refusing to. Your eyes closed in a moment of utter peace as they pressed a soft kiss on your forehead. Holding you close enough to convince you it wasn’t really over.

Only to be broken apart then they whispered again. “Go.”

[narwhalandchill]

okok so ya know that post i mentioned i was writing on some of the harbinger related leaks that cropped up recently and then mobile fucked me over by publishing the post early by gaslighting me with a "post" button that Clearly read "save" (draft) so i deleted it but managed to rescue the text that was there and promised to finish it and post it later and then its been 12 years anyway? yeah right 😭 Oh well.

BUT. finally. might as well do the thing now in honor of childes bday at the very least KJWJKWDJK. sorry it took this long lmao

jsyk these leaks predate our current natlan beta datamines and some of the questionable story leaks floating around so like, natlan plot wise they dont have shit to do w em there & not bringing up any that ive seen. but ya

(so . attempt 2: recent lazzo VA character direction leaks for the harbingers mostly in relation to childes role in the overall plot. bit ranty and gets Long but idek what yall expected. + ig just potential long term plot implications from these leaks given its the harbingers beware)

aka: mostly concerning the faction stuff + pulcinellas directions for now . if u havent seen em uhhhh

basically tldr: according to (and assuming its not outdated) some information accessed by leakers recently originally provided for the VAs applying to voice the harbingers in lazzo, the group is allegedly split between two factions of "conservatives" and "radicals" . like thats the first thing

now as to what those labels rly mean ppl were overall speculating that it might be sth along the lines of. conservatives as the tsaritsa loyalists who stand united and for the organization and her majestys goals above all (OR alternatively just like. a more cautious take on How to approach the toppling celestia deal) VS those whose true ambitions, loyalty and methods they are willing to turn to are more of a wild card situation . and their allegiances are equally volatile in turn . & i will say imo the radicals are also most likely much less of an united group compared to the conservatives given uhhhhhhh. well you will see

so conservatives are: capitano, columbina, pulcinella, sandrone

radicals are: dottore, arle (see the "radicals might not like each other that much"), pantalone

pierro is neutral, childe is unknown/undecided according to the leaks HOWEVER. his positioning next to the radicals in the shot of lazzo with the harbingers standing around signoras coffin split along those same faction lines found in the leaks may indeed suggest something Interesting regarding his penultimate choice . if it Indeed is intended to be meaningful that he as an "unknown" just happened to take That side of the coffin alongside the 3 confirmed radicals according to this info . like how Curious

And i just. okay okay i have to be Honest theres like. SUCH a toxic childish taking-fandom-grievances-too-seriously part to me eyeing the possibility of ajax turning out to be a radical thats just like. dawei lets this happen and i WILL be the WORLDS most obnoxious fucking bitch about it bc . Listen

i. Have. ALWAYS. thought it obvious as FUCK . that a guy whose ambition WILL NOT stop until it is the very WORLD that lies defeated at his feet. will NEVER be satiated by what the fatui can offer him . like if he really is a radical. i can CONFIDENTLY state that i saw that shit coming in TWENTY FUCKING TWENTY and that Every single doubter owes me So much fucking money 💀💀💀💀💀💀 jkjk but. Duuuude. ever since this faction stuff dropped.... i cant stop thinking abt it

like i just. cannot stand the way its been turned into this . INDOMITABLE 100% factual absolute Truth that CANNOT be challenged. in the fandom. that childe is a tsaritsa fanboy loyalist devout worshipper who couldnt even fuckimg FATHOM leaving his allegiance to her behind . when its been . SPELLED OUT to yall in his fucking profile SINCE 1.1 .

bc like. Listen up. Repeat after me. ik its scary and new after 4 years of Exclusively hearing takes where like childe would rather spontaneously combust to the beat of snezhnayas national anthem while begging for repentance than ever stop taking orders from uhhhh a god. Who he definitely worships devoutly as a god despite 0 evidence on any religious piety on his part Trust (like. ive. Always thought his voiceline for her has been the opposite? its very much. Not how youd speak of divinity. his regard for her is Personal and relates to the tsaritsa as an individual, not a god inherently deserving of worship)

like ik this is a big thing and scary but just. Say the words with me here. It only stings once .deep breaths. okay 1 2 3

"But becoming Tartaglia was far from his end goal. To someone who sought to conquer the world, this was but a tiny step in his journey."

YUP.

BECOMING TARTAGLIA. BECOMING A HARBINGER. SWEARING AN OATH OF LOYALTY TO THE TSARITSA. A TINY. STEP. A TINY FUCKING STEP. AND HES BEEN AWARE OF IT BEING LIKE THIS THE ENTIRE TIME.

THIS HAS BEEN TEXT FOUND IN GAME THERE FOR NEARLY FOUR FUCKING YEARS NOW . AND PPL STILL THINK AJAX ISNT CAPABLE OF SURPASSING AND ABANDONING THE TSARITSA THE SECOND THE BENEFITS THEY OFFER HIM FALL SHORT OF THE EXPONENTIAL GROWTH OF HIS POWER AND AMBITION AND WHAT IT TAKES TO SATIATE HIM .

like im SORRY contrary to maybe popular belief and despite my persistent frustrations w this fandoms approach to ajax sometimes i Do in fact feel actively mean and unreasonably harsh calling 97% of childe "fans" functionally illiterate or at the very least intentionally obtuse to the point its beyond fucking parody in how ridiculous it gets but like. if THIS isnt what a complete and utter failure of basic reading comprehension is I DONT KNOW WHAT IS . like. DUDE 😭😭😭😭😭😭 what IS IT with these people its like genuinely fucking incomprehensible to me how CRITICAL shit about his character like this goes COMPLETELY ignored as if it hasnt been established since Day fucking one its unreal . Unreal 💀

and like. i get bitchy and snappy abt it i know its not the best look always but man its sth thats genuinely upsetting to me too bc . THIS is the fucking dude thats possessed me for the last 4 years THIS is what i love about him his potential to surpass Every Single Boundary that he has begun his journey confided within. that he will transcend it all and surpass his own limits with sheer fucking willpower over and over again until even the few he truly idolized and respected like the tsaritsa and capitano are suddenly so distant and irrelevant compared to the heights He has reached out for in his hunger....... its so peak like THIS is whats had me in a death grip for all this time

and like. for THAT guy that mr childe ajax tartaglia the REAL thing to barely even. Exist. in the minds of such a majority of the fandom its just fucking crushing sometimes. like i wanna appreciate all this abt him man i wanna share all my brainrot abt him and how this dude consumes my every waking thought but then borderline every single comment i see and popular take on him is just oh my pookie wookie babie girl would Never be able to betray tsaritsa ever etc etc etc and just.... Sigh

anyway overshare over sorry for that. yeah my ADHD makes me irrationally attached to my hyperfixations its kinda cringe .

do catch me kissing this man on the mouth Immediately the second his ambition surpasses the fatui and he goes beast mode fr fr on Everyone tho 🥰🥰 dyke license lost forever but itll be worth it

also real talk im like fairly convinced at least like 78% of the omgggg hes forever loyal to the tsaritsa gang are mostly like stuck in this mindset of like. omgggg hed Never Betray Her bc he doesnt like those who break promises uwu and its like. since when did the possibility of ajax outgrowing the stage where the fatui offer him anything worthwhile automatically equate to him betraying her wholesale and completely dropping any and all respect he had for her or sth. like yeah i do agree to an extent that it could end up p uncharacteristic (at least w/o proper plot setup or reasoning) for him to pull off like a complete disney twist villain backstab out of nowhere there but??? thats not rly whats going to automatically happen either???

(nvm that like a considerable portion of these same ppl were prolly writing "omgg ajax my poor victim MUST betray the evil tsaritsa" fics in 1.1 when everyone had the idea in their heads that he hates his job and is only doing it bc his family is held hostage and is also 17 bc of certified english localization moment. but i digress this is just unreasonably petty and im being a loser by not letting this shit go 2 this day💀💀)

bc like. if you ask me. the Interesting thing abt ajax and the possibility of being a radical IS that if hes going to refuse to follow an order or step out of line to follow his own path however it goes. its Not going to be personal. its not gonna be this big dramatic edgelord turncoat villainous moment to him. itll be straightforward. matter of fact. easy as breathing. because if he has moved past each and every benefit the fatui can even fathom offering him. its only natural that he progresses beyond them. thats just how his unquenchable ambition Works. how his black hole of a never-ending desire to devour and crush all in his path operates. its not personal. its not something you can change. its inevitable. he is a force of nature when it comes to the drive burning at the core of his soul.

like i Really dont think hes ever going to backstab the tsaritsa in some dirty play fashion??? if anything its only fitting that hes going to look her In the eye and go. oh my bad. i dont think our agreement serving a mutual benefit really holds ground anymore. apologies. like ofc its going to be something he handles while staying true to the person hes been all this time. kind of a bad guy and perfectly willing to own up to it. selfish and arrogant and with his sights set steadfast on a goal No one will get him to sway from.

and then he elopes with the narwh-------------- yes kill me

basically i just. dont get this whole perceived and persistent incompatibility between the idea of. ajax being a radical (whatever that ends up meaning in the story. IF these lazzo materials remain accurate) yet remaing the same guy we know and love. like guys. ARLE. is a radical. and has all but directly confessed to considering the survival of the house her greatest priority over any loyalty to the fatui and her majesty. yet she STILL regards her with respect and continues to fulfill her duties as a harbinger as expected for the time being. despite her full awareness of this loyalty being on shakier ground and surely making contingencies on the side for the future for When she sees it is time for her organization to sever the ties to the tsaritsa.

like Thats what i mean when i say its always been completely reasonable and even predictable to me that ajax would outgrow the fatui and how that has jack shit to do with his character suddenly doing some wild 180 in order to do so. and why this potentially significant visual alignment he has with the radicals in lazzo isnt surprising at all. bc if it doesnt fundamentally change who arle is (and doesnt make her a dottore fan) that she is ultimately someone whose loyalty to the organization comes second to her house. why would childe be any different lmao.

but like yes if he turns out to be a radical i will be soooooo obnoxious over it jkwjkawdjkwajkwdakjwdjkwdjkdwjk bc like im NOT lying this has been one of the Clearest trajectories ive expected from his arc All This Time . no matter which form it might eventually take in terms of. is it him and His growth initiating the split. or is it a betrayal from or a loss of faith in the tsaritsa herself that kickstarts it. if its canon? yeah i Saw that shit coming and you should all be scared of who ill become if dawei proves me right Again ill be the Worst

Phew that sure went way overboard but yes radical ajax advocacy group in here 100% . and overall even tho i mostly care abt him i Do think this faction split is inherently v fucking interesting and ajax being unknown is just. i wonder if itll end up being significant at some critical moment that his faction leanings are unknown slash undefined at the moment............... where the scales are about to tip and its by his hand that some key moment gets its turning point......... hmmmmmmm

(also its just. before these leaks we got "columbina is conservative" as an out of context statement Before the faction stuff and its still so fucking funny bc ppl were just like. wow i cant believe shes homophobic)

now. pulcinella time

so among the VA direction cards that leaked was his. and like if u didnt see them urself (not gonna post any here. hoyo lawyers love striking Any hoyo copyrighted media in all posts that have leaks in em even if its not an actual leak which this is lol) the setup is basically. theres a few overall notes on each of the harbingers like age, demeanor, characterization and then 3 sample lines of dialogue as well as notes further elaborating when & why this is being said and with what sort of vibe.

and his are. Well. you know how i started this post out being like on god dawei if you go and fatten my ego any further by Specifically vindicating me myself and i & the kinda things id prefer in genshins story and childes role going forward . Personally????

Anyway funny thing as it happens. IF (and admittedly thats a major if.) this VA direction doc from pulcinella holds up. and there isnt like a hidden scheming menacing side to him that wasnt brought up in the lazzo files. in that case . it sure is looking like pulcinella is just. a bit over the top in public but privately genuinely an overworked well-meaning pragmatic guy who deeply cares for and is truly protective of those important to him. INCLUDING. yes you know who and his family. NOTHING in the doc whatsoever implying anything sinister to it. nor wrt pulcinellas character overall.

and i just. nothing personal to scara fans yall are cool and ur guy is too i just simply. Cannot. guys can you IMAGINE being so much of an edgelord cynical embarrassment puppetfailure that ur own mommy issues make you physically incapable of Not assuming the worst of pulcinella caring for childes family leading to YEARS of ppl being CONVINCED hes gonna be this major fucking villain for ajax in the snezhnaya arc i . LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(my scara liker indulgence Ends the second hat guy speaks shit abt My man if you havent noticed. yeah WHO called who naive and stupid???)

like. if the Plot twist in the snezhnaya arc is setting pulcinella up to be this ominous figure that has ulterior motives w childes family and him overall????? only for him to be just. genuinely well-intentioned. oh my fucking god PLEASE let it happen PLEASE bc the entire concept of that whole plotline existing without said plot twist is just soooooo bland and fucking boring to me lol subverting it is just chef kiss

& sure this leak is. very limited in scope it doesnt automatically eliminate pulcinella manipulating childe and/or limiting what information he gets and all. and i genuinely have made my peace with the probable existence of this plot thread w arles SQ already before this whole thing happened but MAN ill be SO fucking happy if this means they might abandon/subvert it altogether like. let him just have a nice supportive mentor figure in his life in the fatui man 😭😭😭

pulcinella if u really just are a nice person ultimately. you TRULY are my goat o777 saving my man from bland family-is-hostage-waa storylines i have Such respect

anyway u could say its not possible for pulcinella to be like. fully a good guy since arles SQ already showcased him being unreliable w information regarding arle but honestly. i kinda disagree. bc like Especially with the faction thing in mind its not unreasonable at all in my eyes that given the Facts of what peruere did. that pulcinella despite not being this scheming schemer brainwashing ajax or whatever. would Genuinely hold a very negative opinion of arlecchino. and convey that to childe. bc like. pulcinella as stated above is in the conservative side of the harbingers. and arlecchino to the outside eyes rly did like. murder a harbinger and her own "mother" and siblings of the house. like do we even know that the harbingers are Aware of how crucabena ran her hunger games death tournament situation to begin with? and Why peruere killed her????

like. if we assume pulcinella doesnt know those things. and that crucabena in all likelihood was if nothing else then presumably a harbinger that was very loyal to the tsaritsa and very consistent. then from that position. of COURSE. youd consider arle a complete downgrade in terms of reliability . she IS a wild card she IS not someone a careful politician like pulcinella would regard highly At All. So like. i dont think when he gives childe the impression that arle is batshit insane and tells him of her (VERY REAL) murderous deeds. i dont think that would automatically equate to pulcinella Knowingly lying and misleading ajax . bc it seems fairly reasonable that pulcinella just genuinely thinks that lowly of her and thus would OBVIOUSLY want his protege not to involve himself with such people.

bc like thats the other thing. its not just arle. in pulcinellas VA notes and the line he has on ajax there. its very clear that he is actively trying to keep him away and shield him from ALL the harbingers . as he still has to mature and grow into someone who will have a chance at gaining their respect proper on his own. so like. if pulcinella thinks its best for ajax to remain away EVEN from the harbingers he himself considers GOOD to NEUTRAL influences and reliable colleagues. of COURSE hed make Extra sure that ajax is staying away from the knave whom pulcinella Actively considers a shitty fit for the job and an unreliable flight risk of a harbinger 💀💀💀💀

(nvm the way arle actively BOTH confirms pulcinellas distrust to be justified by saying the tsaritsa isnt a priority to her and the house is AND actively admits that he prefers other people believe misleading shit about her. so like fym pulcinella thinking the worst of her is surprising)

so like is pulcinellas pov of her at best Highly biased and lacking critical context on Why she merked so many of her sibs and crucabena??? and thus served as an inherently misleading insight on her character when he conveyed it to ajax??? absolutely. but i also dont think hes necessarily lying at all when it comes to perceiving arle in such a negative way so its less. oh i want ajax to remain in the dark forever so he is easy 2 manipulate. more just. thats his Opinion dude and ofc he wants his protege to follow in his stead and not get any poor influences from people like her. it still makes for interesting development & possible tension that childe Is questioning his views on things by making his own judgements about arle but. ya know. its not black and white.

but yeaaaa to be clear me vastly preferring the possibility of scara just being a cringelord unreliable narrator and this whole pulcinella-is-masterminding-dubious-things getting subverted & hes just a guy is just a personal thing lmao. this is pretty old material and far from all-encompassing in terms of Who hoyo wants pulcinellas character to be and all the layers he might hide. im just really 👁️👁️👁️ at the way this particular description of his character seems to be giving off vibes that they in fact Arent actually going all the way into the ulterior motives bad bad ajax watch out pulcinella and its just. listen theres way more interesting shit for ajax to be doing in the endgame plot than some generic plot like that!!!!!!!11! sorry!!!1 so id 1000% want it this way instead lmao

but we shall see where it goes. at the very least if this desc of pulcinella holds Any ground at all then it does disqualify the most extreme version of hes just basically evil manipulator mastermind so like. im already super happy with that lmao

but ya . sorry this took me forever to actually finish jwjkwdjkawjkwd these leaks r kinda old news by now rip .

[antoncore]

i’m so nervous about actually interacting with ppl off anon and being part of the community idek anymore i might just write for fun and post it and idk if it gets notes or not… i posted 2 drabbles a while back and.. didn’t get a single note. someone did say the tag search might not be on but i can’t figure out how to change that so whatever.

what did u get ur face painted as? 🥺🥺 and idk i might just hang out and sleep more… honestly really irritated and in a bad mood after visiting my family so i just need to like, lay down for a while now.

- 🧸 anon

i get it, it’s really scary starting a blog :/ but there will always be people who are willing to read your work even if it’s not many initially <3 and maybe your blog is classed as mature?? that could be an issue i think? i got flowers painted on the side of my face, they were so cute!!! that’s completely valid, get the rest you need love, i understand that seeing family can be really draining at times :(

[femslashfictournament]

Femslash fic tournament: Round 1.2

Fast Cars and Slow Jazz Ship: Peggy Carter/Angie Martinelli Fandom: Agent Carter Link: https://archiveofourown.org/series/206534 Summary: Angie’s got suspicions on what Peggy does for a living and she’s determined to protect her at all costs…to other people. It’s not like she’s crazy and about to risk her life for a dame that’s more hot and cold than the plumbing on the third floor of the Griffith Hotel.

Starts as a relatively light fic that's a quick read and evolves into a whole universe with worldbuilding around multiple other MCU characters. Peggy's family! Natasha's backstory! 10/10 recommend for anyone who thought what happened with Agent Carter was a huge missed opportunity.

The World Falls Away For You Ship: Mai/Ty Lee Fandom: Avatar: The Last Airbender Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37488319/ Summary: From the minute she was born, Mai had only to accept the simple truth that love was there, whether she felt it or not. Sentiments such as 'I love you' were unnecessary. Her mother loved her with the teeth of a comb, gliding through Mai’s damp hair as she hummed an unattainable lullabye. No words, just the vibration of a tired voice and rhythmic motion. As a younger child, Mai found comfort in sinking down into her mother’s contentment, wrapped tight in that simple gesture, suffering through harsher tugs and tangles for the feeling of care. Her father loved her with material grants, ready and willing to purchase whatever she so desired, from delicate confectionery treats to finely crafted hairpins and pearl-lined combs. And the love that they shared, the small bond that tied the two to Mai ineffably, came in the ways they pushed her towards a future she couldn’t even begin to grasp, one hand on either shoulder.

holy shit idek how to describe this fic. just wudjzksnfkekcnskwudk it’s incredible. the best characterisation I’ve ever read, the author Gets the characters so well. absolutely STUNNING prose. beautiful imagery, tender and complicated relationships, meshes with canon in Such a good way. this fic is the love of my life

the best mailee fic ever

minutes/millennia Ship: Maribel Hearn/Usami Renko Fandom: Touhou Project Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25916080/chapters/62985241 Summary: When Maribel Hearn doesn't appear at one of their club meetings, Usami Renko assumes that she's dreaming, and that she'll return soon. Months pass, though, and she remains absent; moreover, Renko must find out why someone who looks suspiciously like her has been seen on university campus.

That moment when you get stuck in some other world due to your abilities fudging up but you still love your college girlfriend even after thousands of years (doesn't mean you can't love a different girlfriend too).

[bylightofdawn]

Saw your post saying you're not a Karen Travis fan, and I'm so glad someone is willing to call her out on her BS.

Ahahahhaahaha trying to read the last two RepComm books very nearly broke me mentally and spirtually. I found her soapboxing mostly annoying when reading the Kilo Five trilogy but holy shit the way she reduced every single female to a potential love interest for the clones and even at one point had Kal joke about kidnapping women and bringing them back home? OH HELL NO.

Finding out she's apparently a right-wing terf shithead afterwards wasn't shocking in the least. The thing that continues to stupify me is she writes Walon Vau as this awful, abuser who then gets semi-forgiven by the kids he abuses cause fucking stockholm syndrome or something IDEK she's all over the place character-wise towards the end of the Rep Comm books.

Yet she turns around and demonizes the shit out of Catherine Halsey in the Halo novels like five years later. I don't know if that's just 343 pushing some narrative since they have DEFINITELY taken a turn on how they paint her. The early books she's this saintly mother figure all the SPARTANS adore and now she has a 0% approval rating from most of the galaxy. So I'm not sure if it's Traviss soapboxing or something else. Prolly a combo of the two. she does love her punching bags. And I dunno I dislike seeing someone demonize a character just to justify their bullshit narrative. She she is infamous for that.

I generally try and find the good in most things and don't partcular LIKE indulging in draging people in fandom. The world is hard enough to make my way through without dwelling on negativity and I certainly have to battle my own inherent pessimism on a near daily basis but some people are just....nope. I have zero interest in trying to excuse or defend and Karen Traviss has certainly become one of those people.

Which stinks because I love so many of the Rep Comm characters. And just wish they'd gotten handed to a writer who would have done more than legit reduce all the women to props for the male characters and actually given us some realistical consequences for both Kal and Walon's shitty behavior.

[whoslai]

Helloooo I’m back!! I finally had time to read the new chapters of “Off the Menu” and lets j say I am v frustrated 🙂 can’t help but feel the same uneasiness that yn has expressed about heeseung like he j gives off a weird vibe and it’s uncomfy T T not talking abt ur wiring Becuz ur wiring his absolutely AMAZING that ur able to make me feel this way. Heeseung was def with someone when yn drove over cuz usually ppl would be touched but he was so oddly mad 😭😭

Yn has been nothing but understanding and yet he still says she’s asking for too much T T like is wanting to feel loved by someone u love too much 💀💀and again I do not believe heeseung has absolutely no time throughout the day, i work at a restaurant too and I have time to be on my phone and the whole bullshit abt him not texting a lot until he’s home is stupid too like if u rly cared abt yn u would text her. Like when u truly care abt someone ur willing to change and its not like she’s asking for too much T T

And our girl yn sigh, Idek what to say. I can’t even blame her cuz this is her first time and it seems she likes him more than he likes her and when u like someone that much plus the level of manipulation heeseung is doing she can’t help but be caught in this cycle. Heeseung’s truly been driving her in circles like always promising more always promising that he wants to take it further but instead it j gets worse and worse :(( I am so so mad and frustrated lol everytime heeseung is mentioned I wanna cry 🥲

The fact that he works with lots of girls isn’t even the problem like sire u might not be able to change that the problem is that he lacks the ability to give yn security and make her trust him

Honestly I was hoping she’d get with Jake and make heeseung realize that he doesn’t want her with anyone else but yn was loyal and I respect her for that j didn’t know if heeseung deserved it being the way he is 👀

Now I’m not been confident that heeseung removed Hana cuz it’s so easy to refollow and unblock like I’m so scared for yn 😭😭not ready for her to be hurt ✋🏻

I have so much to say but idk how to get it down in words💀this just how good ur writing is 😭😭if heeseung doesn’t start having his character development soon yn should break it off like girl doesn’t deserve to be treated like this 💔💔

Anyways love u girl can’t wait for the update 😚

(Intensely looking at cute heeseung rn so I stay sane😭)

OH MY GODDDDD this message literally just made my ENTIRE year 😣😣❤️❤️ thank you so so so so much for your kind words, omg, you mean the world to me. tears are falling from my eyes rn 😓😓😓

i love your interpretation of everything, you have an amazing mind. hopefully some good things happen between the both of them or else they’re both doomed 💔

i had so much fun reading this, you don’t even understandddd. got me giggling and kicking my feet reading this 😭😭 if you want, you can totally message me the rest of your thoughts, i would absolutely love to hear about it. you’ve got my mind goin.

love you smmmm and thank you for reading, you just gave me so much motivation 🙁❤️

[xoshepard]

ough that fucking "which d*nmeshi character should you date" quiz read me so hard which also made me so sad like ye i do want people to see me for who i am but im too scared to give myself a place anywhere much less be myself in front of anyone. i dont think ive been myself in front of other people since like 2013. maybe 2012 actually. idek how anymore. i think i want/expect to find someone that like listens and asks questions but im not willing to put myself out there to find people or to just talk without being asked anything so i end up with chronic 🧍 and 😶 syndrome

i feel like i can see my problems but im too comfortable being alone now to do anything about them.

[im-no-jedi]

managed to get at least a couple hours of sleep. I’m obviously still exhausted and will be for the rest of the day. my poor Hunter doll once again being the MVP and let me just cling him to my face while I slept 🥰

more importantly, woke up to a bunch of nice messages from people. y’all are seriously the best. regardless of my opinion of the show, I’m so freaking grateful for getting to interact with this fandom. I’ve made some really great friends as a result, and just had some lovely interactions with people in general. other than the characters themselves, getting to be in the same space as y’all has been the best part of this 🥺💙

I’m still hurting, and I will be for a while. Idk what my status in the fandom will be going forward. despite what I said this morning, I don’t want to 100% give up on the show yet. I may be upset the show is ending after this season, but I’m willing to give it one last chance at redemption. until then, my main focus will definitely be on MLWTBB and making art. gifs and other “official” content will most likely still be made, but more sporadically. Idek when I’ll be able to make myself rewatch season 2 at this point, so yeah. but my personal content will continue for sure. the story and characters I’ve created for this show are extremely important to me, and I want to share them with others. also, I apparently have to continue to fix things more than I thought I would haha.

as I said before, my inbox is always open and I’d love to continue chatting with y’all. especially if you’re like me and need some reassurance, or just someone to rant to. seriously, I’d love to hear some rants; it’s cathartic for me to read/hear LOL

I’m not giving up. I refuse to give up. if this really is about “hope and redemption” like DBB said, then I’m not letting this fully destroy me. I love these characters way too much for that. and I love this community too. we’re gonna be ok guys 💙💙💙

[devilisln-moved]

HEADCANONS

—    basics.

is your muse tall/short/average?  According to comic based character dossiers, Matt is 6′0, which is just about average, though I’m not really fussed if people have a particular impression of Matt’s size as influenced by the tv series what with Charlie Cox being 5/9, which isn’t really that short, tbh. Idek idek, I could go on for a little while about how badly skewed height is when it comes to men like no I’m sorry, but 5′9 is not a short king..are they okay with their height?  Yeah, he’s not really one to be intimidated by other��s people’s sizes compared to his. For obvious reasons and also he seems pretty secure with himself physically. do they spend a lot of time on their hair/grooming?  Yes, but it’s complicated. It’s less a matter of primping and more a matter of being tidy and clean, more due to his own particularities than vanity. So yeah, his suits are gonna be clean and pressed but he might have bed head bruised knuckles. does your muse care about their appearance/what others think?  Matt has some understanding that he’s an attractive man. Certainly, he lives in his own body but he can also read the physiological reactions of other people in his presence. He likes being perceived as desirable, but he also takes rejection gracefully for the most part. Matt worries about the state of his soul and mind more than what others think of his aesthetically. He knows he’s handsome and as a man has the ultimate cheat code of wearing a well-cut suit.

—    preferences

indoors or outdoors?  Indoors, but by a very small margin. Either way, the focus is less on inside/outside and more if he has the area maps out in his mind. It’s why he doesn’t travel much. it’s not just the matter of it being taxing to his senses, but his radar sense is basically his “eyes”. New places haven’t been mapped out, so he’s completely out of his element. Comparatively, though, indoors are much easier to predict than outdoors. rain or sunshine? Sunshine. Rain fucks with his senses. Yeah, yeah, I know the movie said the opposite but I trust Mark Waid’s vision lmao. Basically it makes it harder for him to read locations and orient himself. forest or beach? Hmmmm....hard to say. On one hand, trees sometimes make landscapes hard for him to cope. Beaches are generally nice, flat open spaces, but he wouldn’t like tropical beaches. Matt is very temperature sensitive and detests extremes.Also sand. Sand would drive him crazy. precious metals or gems?  I don’t really think he has a preference overall aside from preferring silver, gold, platinum, and naturally produced gems due to the way they smell better than metal alloys, nickel, and other costume jewelry. He’s not completely adverse. Stainless steel, pewter, glass, etc. are not offensive to him. flowers or perfumes? He likes both? Obviously flowers are superior, but he’s not completely opposed to perfumes and colognes. I do think he’s very sensitive to strong scents and artificial ones and doesn’t care much for say, some cheap fruity smelling body spray is going to give him a headache, but a well crafted, carefully balanced perfume is going to stand out to him. personality or appearance?  Obviously personality is going to matter more to him, but Matt does judge by some superficial standards, in his own way. For example, he’s not going to date someone that smells bad to him or has a quality of voice might completely put him off. being alone or in a crowd?  He doesn’t like large crowds as a general rule. It’s too overwhelming, especially a tightly packed one. It’s far too much stimulation for him and while he’s very skilled in managing the input that he’s experiencing day to day, he can get to a breaking point and just need to disconnect from the perpetual sensory onslaught. order or anarchy? Bit of both, because I do believe a little bit of anarchy has to be in his heart to do what he does. He’s very aware that the system is broken and while he’s willing and capable of working within the system to push against corruption and authoritarian mindsets, he’s just as aware that a broken system might just need to be shattered before it can be rebuilt and repaired. painful truths or white lies?  White lies. Matt lies a lot, if I’m to be quite frank. He lies about being Daredevil, he lies about his senses, he lies about whether or not he’s blind (ie: He’s perfectly fine with letting people think he can see when he’s in Daredevil mode). He lies about why he’s built the way he is (because y’know, I don’t think Matt is jacked or anything but I mean, he would look like he works out and is at peak physical condition, which I think a lot more people should notice lmao). science or magic?  Considering he has weird powers and has some vague sense of belief in a higher power (as I’ve mentioned before, I’m kinda eh on an overemphasis on his religiosity but I don’t like think he’s an atheist or anything), Matt is open minded when it comes to the unknown. He doesn’t trust magic over science, however, and his first instinct on something is to approach something logically. night or day?  No preference. There’s an interesting sleep disorder called non-24 hour circadian rhythm that affects blind people more often than most, It affects Matt from time to time, usually when his life is less ordered on a day to day basis for one reason or another. There are certain tells that inform him of the time or day, but I think it really only informs a sense of self rather tan day/night if that makes any sense (although admittedly even that’s very thin since Daredevil does not necessarily work only at night). dusk or dawn?  Dawn has a certain scent that appeals to him. warmth or cold?  Neither. He prefers mild temperatures.. Not too hot not too cold. many acquaintances or a few close friends?  A few close friends. Less people to trust his secrets with. However, I will say, Matt is a friendly person as a general rule, warm and compassionate. So he’s an easy conversationalist with just about anyone. reading or playing a game? For obvious reasons, reading appeals more. Since Matt was blinded at that formative age where one Christmas a Gameboy could get his hooks in him (although who know. As a general rule, his father is portrayed as a bit of a taskmaster when it came to his studies and school work. Jack might have been the type to deter Matt from wanting video game consoles or going to arcades), I don’t think he’d be the type to look into video games geared toward blind players in adulthood. Although he’s very literate with braille, Matt often listens to audiobooks and podcasts as well.

—    questionnaire.

what are some of your muse’s bad habits? The big ones are lying, recklessness/impulsive behaviour, being overtly judgemental, and being very, very secretive. Not just about being Daredevil but of how badly he’s hurt, how deep a shit he’s in when it comes to certain situations. The judgemental aspect, naturally comes with his strong moral centre and sometimes holding people at such high standards, but also on their lifestyle. For example, throughout Mark Waid’s run of writing Daredevil, Matt often expresses distaste over what Foggy eats and his sedentary tendencies. has your muse lost anyone close to them?  lol lmao, yeah most of family, his mentor, various lovers, friends, etc. Matt can be a little edgy about getting close to new people, but he’s also fully of empathy, compassion, and is very, very lonely. what are some fond memories your muse has?  They’re all related to the people in his life. Despite having enforced solitude drilled into from a young age, he greatly values the people in his life. While i truly don’t think there is much of a division between Matt and Daredevil, he’s not like Batman, who often seems to exhibit some dissociative tendencies, the fondest memories are linked to  being Matt Murdock. is it easy for your muse to kill? No, it’s kind of his thing as he’s among the no-kill crew of the vigilante set. You could say in his current series, he’s coming off having a nervous breakdown down due to accidentally killing someone (presumably his first, though you could probably cynically argue that it’s the first that he knows about). is your muse capable of trusting someone with their life?  Yes but he does still tend to be loner on the scene. He’s perfectly capable of trusting other heroes and collaborating, but his natural tendency is to go out and sort something alone until he has to seek out someone else’s help. what’s your muse like when they’re in love? Matt has a bit heart and I feel like he kinda wears it on his sleeve. I think it’s really cute that so many of his partners end up getting referred to as “the love of his life”, so i think it’s pretty clear that he goes all in when he falls in love. While he’s still secretive and protective against his night shift.it’s not out of disrespect. I’d say it looks good on him. Matt seems to be better off with companionship. I think it helps to ease some of the weight of the world off his shoulders and keeps his darker thoughts and feelings at bay. He likes to share his life and experience with others, and ends up being an invested and attentive partner when he’s not being a bit of a flake. He doesn’t mean to be, he’s just got a demanding job, either way you slice it. Personally, I think it’s better when the person he’s with knows he’s Daredevil. Matt feels guilty when he has to lie and cancel dates because of his vigilantism, whether he get caught up in something or ends up too injured.

tagged by: @overclocks​ tagging: free for all <333333

[mermaid-trash]

Russian Into Love - Pt 1

Pairing: Alexei x fem!reader

A/n: (pls ignore the pun title, it was meant to be just a working title but I can’t think of anything better 😭) soooo this is the first part to a slow burn fake dating/marriage thing that I’ve had in my head since watching s3 of Stranger Things, I’m gonna be playing fast and loose with canon and idek if the s4 plot will be in this buuut I’m having fun writing it :)) pls feel free to comment and tell me what you think bc I personally love this and I want you all to love it too ❤️

(All Russian translations were taken directly from google translate so pls don’t attack me, attack mr google instead)

Wordcount: 2.9k

You were certain that you were going to lose your mind. It had been days since you had really looked at the sky, watched the clouds roll by like passing trains, and you were convinced that another day spent staring at the same faded floral wallpaper would be the death of you.

“Y’know, Murray, I’ve been thinking…” You began tentatively, not raising your eyes from the gossip magazine you had been pretending to read for quite some time.

“Sounds dangerous. Try not to do it again.” Murray dismissed without even looking up from the book he was wasting away his own time with. Ignoring his quip, you continued as though uninterrupted.

“I think we should go to California with Joyce and the kids.”

The idea had been playing on your mind for days, ever since you had learned that Hopper was gone. And after 4 days hiding in a motel room with Murray and the quiet Russian scientist, you were desperate for any opportunity to get out and as far away from these four walls as possible. Murray’s head snapped up from the book he was reading in the old armchair in the corner of the room, and Alexei’s eyes left the TV playing Loony Tunes to watch the conversation in interest.

“Oh? And why’s that?” Murray asked, his voice tinged with the familiar condescension that you had come to expect from him.

“Well, first off, if we have to stay in this motel much longer I think I might snap and start killing people. Secondly,” your tone softened slightly, “I’m worried about Joyce, and I think we should try to be close by.”

As Murray pondered your words, Alexei watched you both patiently while waiting for a translation. Murray knew as well as you did that with everything that had happened in the Starcourt mall and the subterranean Russian lab, Joyce had a lot to deal with right now, and while you both knew that she was capable of looking after herself, you just couldn’t stand the idea of her moving away on her own.

“As much as I may agree with you, we can’t go anywhere until Alexei’s green card situation is resolved.” Murray argued eventually.

“в чем дело?” [What’s going on?] Alexei asked, but before Murray could respond to him, you continued.

“Yeah, well, there is an easy way to deal with that. If Alexei wants to.” You said, and Murray’s head snapped up to look at you in obvious surprise.

It wasn’t the first time the idea had been brought up; Murray had mentioned marriage as a solution to Alexei’s citizenship situation on the very first day of your captivity, but it had been dismissed quickly because finding someone to marry Alexei would prove difficult, perhaps even impossible. So, Murray had moved his attention onto finding other ways to solve the problem, whereas you had been unable to stop thinking about it; it was such a simple solution, you were willing and as long as Alexei was too, you could soon see the other side of the motel room door.

“There is. Are you volunteering?” Murray asked with a cocked eyebrow.

“If it gets us out of this room, sure.” You replied, crossing your arms across your chest determinedly and trying to ignore the nervous pounding in your chest.

Murray’s gaze fixed on your face only intensified, his eyes narrowing as he regarded you closely from behind tinted glasses.

“I don’t think you’re taking this as seriously as you should be. Marriage is a big deal for most people, you know.” He explained with a frustratingly soft look on his features.

Wordlessly, you stood from your spot on the garish floral bedding and crossed the room to peer through a crack in the blinds. Both men watched you as you made a show of peering from left to right across the mostly empty car park.

“Nope, just as I thought, there’s no queue of men waiting for my hand in marriage.” You sighed dramatically and flopped back down on the bed, while Murray scoffed at your dramatics.

“Murray, что она сказала?” [Murray, what did she say?] Alexei asked again, and this time Murray answered.

“она предложила выйти за тебя замуж из-за грин-карты. и она хочет переехать в Калифорнию.” [She offered to marry you for your green card. And she wants to move to California.] He explained, and Alexei’s head spun quickly to stare at you, eyes wide behind his glasses.

“если мы поженимся, я стану гражданином США?” [If we marry, I’ll be an American citizen?] Alexei spoke, his eyes never leaving you.

You toyed anxiously with a loose thread on the bedding while Murray explained your idea to him. Alexei’s approval of this plan was the only thing coming between you and your escape from this room, so while being rejected by him wouldn’t be the biggest hit your ego had ever taken, it would mean staying here for longer. With the man that had rejected you.

“да. но вы также будете женаты на ней.” [Yes. But you’ll also be married to her.] Though you didn’t understand Murray’s words, you couldn’t miss the disdainful tone at the end and so you shot him a venomous look. Alexei looked thoughtful for a moment, still staring at you.

“это было бы не так уж плохо.” [That wouldn’t be so bad.] He said finally, and Murray let out a hearty laugh.

“What’s so funny?” You asked, jaw clenched at the sigh of Murray’s glee.

“He thinks it’s a good idea.” He stated, causing your heart to leap. It had been surprisingly easy for Murray to convince him, you thought absently. “I’m not taking you to buy a wedding dress, though.”

—————————————————

So just a few days later, after what you were sure must be the fastest, most pragmatic wedding ceremony ever held in Hawkins, you, Murray, and your new husband piled into Murray’s van with what few belongings you still had, and set off for California.

You were admittedly beginning to grow nervous about your plan; once you arrived in California, you and Alexei were moving into a small home under the half-correct guise of being a newly-wed couple moving into their first home together, while Murray had found a new base for his own work somewhere nearby. The nervous pit that bubbled in your chest had nothing to do with the prospect of living with Alexei, you had been living with him in that horrid motel room for over a week at this point and despite the close quarters, he had been a wonderful roommate. Instead, your nerves were flaring up the idea of being caught in the ruse you had agreed to live in for the forseeable future. Or at least, until Alexei met someone he wanted to really marry.

But as you watched the scientist eagerly watching the scenery go with his forehead practically pressed against the windows of the van, you felt your worries fade a little. His smile was infectious, and just existing around him was easy, as natural as breathing. Not to mention the fact that his English was improving steadily; faster than your Russian, luckily.

Just then, Alexei turned towards you and caught you staring. His face split into an ecstatic grin that you couldn’t prevent your own from mirroring.

“это так…тепло.” [It’s so…warm.] He said with a small chuckle, gesturing out of the window.

Even though you didn’t understand his words, his joy was simple and genuine, and you couldn’t stop yourself from grinning along with him. You didn’t even realise you had been staring at him until Murray coughed pointedly, drawing both of your attentions to him.

“Now, I know that this is all very exciting, but you two need to remember that to your neighbours, and friends, and coworkers, and everyone except for me and Joyce, you two are married.” Murray reminded for the hundredth time, enunciating his words with annoying precision as though you were rowdy children. He glanced past you at Alexei, and translated. “Вы должны вести себя так, как будто вы на самом деле женаты. Понять?” [You have to act like you’re actually married. Understand?]

With a glance in your direction, Alexei nodded. Murray turned his gaze on you, one eyebrow raised in that universally understood question: well? You huffed, avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah, sure. Are you gonna give me strict instructions on how to do that? A list of my wifely duties or something?” You questioned snarkily, and Murray tutted in response.

“No, actually, I thought maybe California might melt that icy heart of yours and you can figure out how to be affectionate on your own.” Ignoring your indignant noise, he continued. “Look, I’m not asking you to consummate this faux marriage, just try not to act like our comrade here repulses you too much.” He explained firmly.

“He doesn’t repulse me.” You replied entirely too quickly. Embarrassed heat flared in your cheeks and you ducked your head in the hopes that Murray would not notice; the chuckle he let out told you that he did notice.

When the van finally pulled into the driveway of your new home, set against the late afternoon sky, you hopped out of the back of the van excitedly. It was a relatively small two-story house, with houses on either side that looked like the epitome of suburbia; beige buildings with pristine gardens, even complete with a white picket fence. The mundanity made you want to retch, but instead you focused on your own home and allowed yourself to pretend for a moment that it was real, that it could ever be real for you.

Suddenly, a large hand was in yours, and it raised your hand to Alexei’s lips for him to press a kiss to the back. You stared at him in utter confusion for a second, before he nodded surreptitiously behind him, in the direction of a neighbours house.

In a window at the front of that house, you could see a tanned, blonde woman peering through her curtains, watching your arrival as subtly as she could. Sending her a friendly wave and a smile that you hoped looked genuine, you scoffed lightly.

“Nosy neighbours. Fantastic.” You murmured, mostly to yourself. Alexei watched you with a faint smile, before pulling you eagerly towards your new home.

Together, though no longer holding hands, you explored the house; Alexei was simply delighted by the small pool in the backyard, and you were pleased to find the kitchen already equipped with a fridge and oven. Then you ventured up the stairs and found four doors, behind which were a linen closet, a hideously beige tiled bathroom, and thankfully, two bedrooms, both already furnished with basic double beds.

You glanced at Alexei and he met your gaze with a half smirk, both of you seemingly grateful to not have to share a bed in order to protect your newly-wed image. He entered one of the rooms wordlessly and you entered the other, one with a window overlooking the back yard, and dropped your backpack on the floor at the foot of the bed. You couldn’t help the sigh of relief that slipped past your lips; all things considered, the house was nice. Murray had really showed you some mercy with the two bedrooms, too. You had almost been expecting him to make this as uncomfortable as possible, just to spite you for being a constant thorn in his side.

“Alright, lovebirds, I’m leaving!” Murray called up the stairs, and you stepped out onto the landing to see him standing at the bottom of the staircase.

“Wait, we don’t have any groceries and I’m starving, you’re leaving me here without food on my wedding night?” You asked in faux incredulity, to which Murray rolled his eyes.

“There’s a flyer for a pizza place by the front door, will that be adequate for the blushing bride?” He asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” You waved off his snide comment with a dismissive scoff. “You’re coming back tomorrow though, right?”

“Yes, I’m coming back tomorrow to take you and loverboy to buy a car. Hopefully, that’ll stop you from bugging me to take you places.” Murray replied with another roll of his eyes.

Before you could respond with a quip of your own, Alexei stepped out of his bedroom and onto the landing beside you. He and Murray exchanged words in quick fire Russian, before Alexei nodded, and brushed past you with a gentle smile into the bathroom.

“I just told your dearly beloved to be ready to go at 10am tomorrow. You’d better not make me wait.” Murray explained, waving a finger at you as though you were a naughty child.

“Would I do that?” You asked as innocently as you could, fighting back a smile as Murray began to walk away.

“You would and you have, repeatedly. Don’t make me leave you behind.” His final warning, only intended half jokingly, rang out as the sound of the front door closing signalled Murray’s departure.

Breathing out a slight chuckle, you tried to ignore the ache in your chest that already missed Murray and his quick wit; although you had always argued with him and seemingly done everything within your power to irritate him, you and he both knew that it was all in good fun. After years spent alone, you both had found verbal sparring partners within each other, and the few short years you had lived with him had been the happiest that you could remember.

You remained in place on the landing, absorbed in your thoughts, until the sound of running water reminded you of Alexei’s presence in the bathroom. The realisation that he was there, just on the other side of the dark wooden door beside you, and presumably about to shower, sent a cold jolt though your veins and before you could think about it you were darting away from the bathroom door and bolting down the stairs as quickly as you could.

Since your living room was totally devoid of furniture, you elected to sit outside in the back yard beneath the late afternoon sun as it slowly dipped towards the horizon. Lying on your back on the warm ground, you kicked off your shoes and allowed your feet to dangle in the pool, relishing in the coolness of the water around your ankles as you gently kicked your feet. With your eyes closed, you allowed yourself a single moment of peace and serenity before what you were certain would be a busy week, with your new house to be fully stocked and decorated.

The only thing that signalled Alexei’s arrival by your side was the shadow that he cast over your face, the sudden darkness prompting your eyes to open. He stood, towering above you, with damp curls and that same cheery smile across his face.

For an evil genius Russian scientist, he sure does look friendly, you found yourself thinking.

“Hi,” You said, peering up at him as a smile began to unfurl across your own face.

“Hello.” He said, his accent distorting the word slightly.

Carefully, he lowered himself to sit on the ground beside you, his own feet dangling in the pool beside yours. For a moment he was silent, and you attempted to settle back into the peaceful moment you had found just before, until you were again disrupted by a gentle prod to your cheek.

You opened your eyes to see Alexei, now propped up on an elbow so that he was almost lying beside you, holding a flyer in front of your face. After some squinting, you recognised it as the pizza place flyer Murray had mentioned, for a place called Surfer Boy Pizza.

“You’re hungry?” You asked, tilting your head up towards him. He nodded.

“Da.”

“Alright,” you replied, happy with the simple exchange, and unfolded the flyer to read the menu, “let’s order something then.”

As you were reading through the topping options, Alexei leaned further down over you to point a finger at one of the pictures on the flyer, a picture of a fresh, greasy, pepperoni pizza.

“Say?” He said, looking down at you intently.

As you looked back up at Alexei, his face was cast in shadow from the late afternoon sun behind him, making his features difficult to make out clearly, but you were fairly certain that he was staring intently at your lips. You froze, fixed in place by his watchful gaze. The whole world seemed to stand still for a long moment before you regained the ability to speak.

“P-pizza?” The word came out as a question, and heat flared in your cheeks as he grinned.

“Pizza.” He repeated.

Oh. The pronunciation.

“Y-yeah, pizza.” You repeated, breathing a slight sigh of relief when he finally turned his attention away from you again. “Um. Okay.”

You rose shakily to your feet, the flyer trembling in your grip.

“I-I’m gonna, uh, just, um, go? Inside? And…order pizza? Yeah, um…okay.” And with that, you darted back into the house without a glance back at the man sitting, looking very confused, at the edge of the pool.

The cool indoor air did nothing to soothe the burning in your cheeks after your unbelievably awkward exit, though it was a relief to no longer have Alexei staring at you. The memory of his attention focused so intently on you made you want to curl up in a ball; it had been as though he was the first person to ever truly look at you, and it had made you feel vulnerable in a way you hadn’t in a long time, not even with Murray.

Before you could allow your thoughts to delve too far into what that could mean, you snatched the phone from the receiver and punched in the number with more force than strictly necessary.

[deripmaver]

laurent is a good person - book 1 meta

one of the most amazing things about captive prince is how the reveals in book 3 recontextualize all of the scenes leading up to them, including about laurent himself. in book one, all we see is damen pov as he’s being abused and humiliated by this supposedly spoiled, vile ice prince. when the regent comes to damen and subtly (and not so subtly) insults laurent, calling him unfit to rule - well, why would he think anything different? laurent has insulted him, had him whipped within an inch of his life, and even attempted to (and later successfully lmfao) have him raped while drugged out of his mind. 

after book 3 we can reread most if not all of book 1 as a very traumatized boy who has finally been confronted with the man who killed his brother, leaving him alone with his abusive uncle, and who he clearly has made into a complete monster in his own mind. damen of course sees him as a complete bitch, but there’s textual/subtextual evidence that laurent is well liked, and that his behavior during book 1 was actually pretty out of character for him. i’d like to provide some examples of that now!!!!

“Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult. Damen’s view, half-truncated by the short chain at this neck, had been enough to see that. But Laurent’s expression had shuttered quickly.” Captive Prince, Chapter One

i couldn’t resist adding this one in hehe. laurent recognizes damen!! he’s come down, knowing his uncle has devised another truly horrendous and triggering “gift” and that he’ll lose support if he calls it our for what it truly is, only to find out that it’s fucking damianos of akielos sent to him as a sex slave. a jab at laurent’s trauma about auguste and also a jab at laurent’s frigid sexuality - which ofc is completely the regent’s fault. fuck that guy so much lmfao 

“‘It’s so rare to see you at these entertainments, Your Highness,’ said Vannes.” Captive Prince, Chapter Two.

this is right before the fight between govart and damen in the ring, of course. damen sees laurent as depraved and vile as the sexual sadism on display by the veretian court, and considers him to be a willing purveyor of it. this is wrong, of course, as said by vannes here. laurent has only shown up because he wants to humiliate damen lmfao.

“He did remember being supported by two of the guards, here, in this room, while Radel stared athis back in horror. ‘The Prince really . . . did this.’ ‘Who else?’ Damen said. Radel had stepped forward, and slapped Damen across the face; it was a hard slap, and the man wore three rings on each finger. ‘What did you do to him?’ Radel demanded.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

this scene, to me, was the most telling lmfao. it’s right after damen is whipped. you could argue that radel is just a servant in the employ of the royal household, so is of course going to be loyal to the prince, but he seems genuinely surprised of the prince’s cruelty towards damen. not only that, but he slaps him and immediately assumes damen must have done something. which - i mean, technically he did lmao. not necessarily enough to deserve having the skin flayed from his back, but you know. if laurent was in the habit of torturing pets and slaves, why would the overseer react this way?

“The men guarding him were the Prince’s Guard, and had no affiliation with the Regent whatsoever. It surprised Damen how loyal they were to their Prince, and how diligent in his service, airing none of the grudges and complaints that he might have expected, considering Laurent’s noxious personality. Laurent’s feud with his uncle they took up wholeheartedly; there were deep schisms and rivalries between the Prince’s Guard and the Regent’s Guard, apparently.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

laurents relationships with his guards are also some of the biggest indicators that he isn’t just a spoiled brat, but can insire a deep loyalty in his men. even if they do all want to fuck him. ah, sexual harassment. it’s also hilarious that damen immediately assumes they’re loyal to him because they want to fuck him - nice projection there, dude. we know a bit more about laurent and his guards thanks to green but for a season, but this little bit here is interesting.

“Laurent was indeed good at talking. He accepted sympathy gracefully. He put his position rationally. He stopped the flow of talk when it became dangerously critical of his uncle. He said nothing that could be taken as an open slight on the Regency. Yet no one who talked to him could have any doubt that his uncle was behaving at best misguidedly and at worst treasonously.”  Captive Prince, Chapter Five

idek what to say here. laurent my beloved <3333

“‘When someone doesn’t like you very much, it isn’t a good idea to let them know that you care about something,’ said Laurent. Damen felt himself turn ashen, as the threat sank in. ‘Would it hurt worse than a lashing for me to cut down someone you care for?’ said Laurent.” Captive Prince, Chapter Seven

this isn’t really relevant to my thesis lmfao i just love this exchange bc it gives SO MUCH information about laurent and his uncle in just three lines of dialogue. what has the regent done, who did he cut down just to hurt laurent? when and how did laurent learn that? p a i n 

“Laurent’s fussy horse began acting out again, and he leaned forward in the saddle, murmuring something as he stroked her neck in an uncharacteristically gentle gesture to quiet her.” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine. 

HORSEY NO- lmfao this scene just hurts so badly on the reread. especially later on, in book 3 i think, where laurent says something like “i provoked my uncle.” he’s really blaming himself for his uncle KILLING HIS HORSE, his horse that his murdered brother trained, one of the only living connections to auguste... all because his uncle could not let a single miniscule plan laurent had set go through without some kind of repercussion. literally all laurent did was do something to stop an innocent group of people from being abused, nothing to undermine his uncle’s rule, but because the regent is VILE he could not let laurent have even this. he’s so good with her, too. he must have known by this point and also known that there was no way to stop this. P A I N

“‘I know that you have somehow arranged this,’ said Erasmus. He was incapable of hiding what he felt, and just seemed to radiate embarrassed happiness. ‘You kept your promise. You and your master. I told you he was kind,’ Erasmus said. ‘You did,’ said Damen. He was pleased to see Erasmus happy. Whatever Erasmus believed about Laurent, Damen wasn’t going to dissuade him. ‘He’s even nicer in person. Did you know he came and talked to me?’ said Erasmus. ‘—He did?’ said Damen. It was something he couldn’t imagine. ‘He asked about . . . what happened in the gardens. Then he warned me. About last night.’ ‘He warned you,’ said Damen. ‘He said that Nicaise would make me perform before the court and it would be awful, but that if I was brave, something good might come at the end of it.’ Erasmus looked up at Damen curiously. ‘Why do you look surprised?’ ‘I don’t know. I shouldn’t be. He likes to plan things in advance,’ said Damen.” Captive Prince, Chapter 9.

this is the first in-text confirmation we have that laurent has a good heart beneath his layers and layers of trauma-induced lashing out. book one often skeeves people out because of its graphic and, honestly, yes, kind of sexualized depiction of rape, slavery, and depravity, but beneath it all you meet these two protagonists who are going to have all of their most deeply held views about each other challenged. laurent from very early on is shaken to his core when damen refuses to rape nicaise in the ring - it cracks the very foundations of the person he’d built up in his head as this horrible monster who killed his brother in cold blood. and damen keeps defying laurents expectations by being a good person through and through. on the other hand, laurent spends the first part of the book taking out years of anger on damen, but here for the first time we see him do something just because its the kind thing to do. yes, torveld is an ally against his uncle, but laurent has clearly been scheming with him for a while now, and he’s now overlooking his hatred of damen and working with him just because none of the slaves deserve whats happened to them. it’s such a sweet moment.

“One of the other men, eyeing them, approached a moment later. ‘Don’t mind Jean. He’s in a foul mood. He was the one had to stick a sword through the mare’s throat and put her down. The Prince tore strips off him for not doing it fast enough.’” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- pt 2. this is just another really sweet and sad detail - laurent being so upset that the horse’s death could have been more painless. it must have hurt so much to see her in pain, and to know that the only way for that pain to end was being put down as quickly as possible. i wuv him. im sad

that’s it, though there are still a few more chapters left in the book. this isn’t providing any new information, of course, the path of the three books is to show that laurent isnt the man we meet in book one, that he’s actually sweet, and earnest, and he’s been fighting his own battle practically alone against his abuser since he was fifteen years old. also, the reveal that laurent knew who damianos was from the start makes it clear imo that all of his violence in book 1 was supposed vengence, not... him being evil. he apologizes explicitly in-text, and also, all of the acts of violence he commits cause serious problems for him in terms of his future alliance which he then needs to fix. i just love how layered these books are, how there’s so much information in them that makes rereading almost more fun than reading them for the very first time!

[positivityforlesbians]

Hey so I’m not sure if there’s a central point to this ask but what do you do when you feel more or less “outnumbered”? I stupidly searched some tags that I knew would upset me and it seems like so many people have an inherent bias against “white cis lesbians” and it seems like they throw the word white in front of it just to get away with being misogynistic and homophobic because their arguments are never about race. They’re about if someone is in the wrong for having sexual boundaries. Also, I’m not even white and those posts make me feel like a bigot for being a lesbian. Which is how I know that adding “white” is so superficial. I keep reading that my aversion to male genitalia (even the male genitalia that has been surgically restructured) makes me transphobic and that i need to unlearn that aversion but it just doesn’t make sense to me?? I look to the comments and see one or two others like myself who are genuinely confused and the most common response is “I’m not google” or “examine the root of your preferences”. But my examining is so brief because I was literally BORN THIS WAY. I think about it and it’s so clear to me that my body and brain love female bodies and are repulsed by male bodies. It all feels like mass brain washing and conversion therapy.

To make matters worse, there’s no safe way to even vent this frustration without being called a “terf”. I feel like being born a same sex attracted woman has doomed me to inevitably being labeled a terf when idek much about terfs other than being called one is a really bad thing. People are supposed to pick ideology/schools of thought. From what I’ve seen, lesbians who are vocal about their sexuality are forced into that box by other people. If that makes sense? Its almost comically absurd. I’d laugh if it weren’t so horrific and homophobic. I feel like I can’t loudly and proudly be a lesbian and it SUCKS because I spent all of high school in the closet and I just feel robbed and I feel betrayed by supposed members of my… “community” who, quite frankly, hate actual homosexuals whether they want to admit it or not. I guess I wanted to know if you think there’s hope for lesbians? Or if the game is rigged for us to be hated by both the left and right? Do you think there are many other lesbians like me who are silently fed up with being the scapegoat of so many people’s anger and insecurity? Is there anything you do to feel better about being unable want male bodies when it feels like literally every other “queer” woman online does/is willing to? I get republicans thinking I’m a freak for loving women. It truly baffles me when democrats, liberals, and fellow gay/bi people also think I’m a bad person for how I was born. It’s so horribly lonely.

Firstly, I once again apologize for being so long to answer. All your concerns are valid and I want you to know that there are absolutely many other lesbians like you who are silently fed up with this hatred against us. Make no mistake it is indeed lesbophobia, this time it's more effective because it hides in plain sight, it goes from mouth to mouth so often unchallenged because people are so afraid to be seen as ostracising and exclusionary.

No matter what these new homophobes say though, we are still unable to change who we are, and why would we want that anyway ? The atmosphere is so toxic, so intoxicating, that lesbians just existing in western supposedly progressive countries are called "terfs" and "transphobes". The ones who are not called that are lucky for now because they're either careful and lying about their real opinion on the matter (which isn't even an opinion but a fact, we are not attracted to the opposite sex) - which worsen it all for the rest of us (no "thank you" to any of you reading this, you're simply hypocritical if you are out there calling us transphobes when you damn well know you wouldn't actually like sex involving pe**s either, duh) or not involved on social media or lgbt spaces irl so they don't know what's going on (which ... I'm kind of jealous of that). The best thing you can do to put distance between this new type of lesbophobia and you is to find the actual self-loving lesbians who are not afraid to be called names if this means being true to our sexual orientation. It's okay to be solely attracted to the same-sex, it's okay to be a lesbian, lesbophobes can die mad about it. ✨

[kingkatsuki]

i want to thank you.

to thank you and your amazing writing skills. thanks to you, i finally started to appreciate myself more, and if you’re willing to listen, i’ll explain why :).

since i started to consider bakugo my comfort character, i always had just one thought in my mind: he’d never, absolutely NEVER, like me. Everytime i tried to imagine myself with him, a huge x would appear on us, especially on me. Somehow, i convinced myself that if bakugo and i ever met, he would hate me. Not because of my body, i was and i am sure that bakugo wouldnt give a flying fuck about that, i just… idk. after sometimes i realized that the problem wasnt with the supposed hate that bakugo would feel towards me, but with the hate I feel towards me. that was it. i hated myself so much, that i couldn’t stand the idea of bakugo katsuki, such a special and wholesome character to me, being in love or just friend with someone i hated with my whole being. idek if it makes sense now that im saying out loud.

luckily, i found your blog. while reading all your fics, os, or ur asks, i started to feel… better, i think?

you always repeat that bakugo would love you just because you’re you, he doesn’t care about stupid things such as body shape, or type, or skin color because you’re so so so special to him that he cant even understand HOW you can hate the person he loves the most.

With that being said, i am thanking you once again. because of you, of your kind words full of love, i started to like myself a bit more. im still not a big fan of me, but im working on it! so thank you, thank you, thank you so very much! ily <3

ps. im not that good with expressing myself, and english isnt my first language, but i still hope you understand what i tried to say. once again thank you, be healthy and stay safe <3

This is one of the sweetest asks I think I’ve ever received.

I used to feel like you too! That me and Bakugou would not be compatible in the slightest, that he’d end up being completely sick of me and leave (if he even bothered with me in the first place!) but lemme tell you, he would.

Bakugou would love every single part of you, for you. He’s not stupid and for him to choose someone to settle down with it means that they are worth the trouble. He wouldn’t waste his time with just anyone and he’s in it for the long haul. He’s willing and ready to do anything to make this relationship work because you’re the person he’s chosen to be with.

Please don’t ever doubt in your mind that you are worthy of love and your Bakugou is out there💕