#like ok. normal about that one
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actually whilst im comparing the utena fandom to utena characters i did have a really funny thought a couple of months ago about how people who neglect the impact of touga’s history with csa do the exact same thing that he does. like they’re both like ‘didn’t happen :) not real :) wouldn’t have any tangible effect whatsoever :) now watch me craft an elaborate web of lies that dont make any fucking sense in order to obfuscate the truth (not pictured here)’. guys who hate kiryuu touga when they do the exact same thing he does
#none of you clowns ever want to unpack what goes on in 31 and 32 re: adoption narratives and it makes me !!!!!!#touga is supposedly The Adopted One and yet nanami is positioned as the ugly duckling#but he only makes that implication to keiko!!!! he’s spinning a narrative that’s more favourable to him!!!!!#because he!! didn’t want!!!! or expect!!!!! this aspect of his life!!!!!! to be used!!!!! in schemes!!!!!!!!!!#mfw my sister deduces that im adopted and i overcomplicate everything in an attempt to obfuscate the truth that no one was even poking at#bc my sense of shame is THAT deep and profound that even acknowledging any aspect of my childhood sends it all unravelling#like ok. normal about that one#you literally see him when nanami says it. react with genuine shock like he’s startled he’s made uncomfortable he’s shocked#and then there’s a pause as he Decides to go along with her belief and craft lies to support it#im just. gahhhhh im so normal#like 31 and 32 are such good episodes that i only started thinking about touga’s experiences in them in the past year or so#bc for the previous three i was just like NANAMIIIIII NANAMI NANAMI#there are so many layers to each character and how they all intersect ohhhhhhhh oh#hey guys did you know i like her tragedy#dais.txt#her tragedy her triumph#obfuscation abventures
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#i feel like tge fact im apprehensive about posting this is kinda proving my point#the way everyone talks about both weight gain and weight loss is just horrendous#like idek if i could fit all i wanna say in here especially while im at work but#i so badly wish people could be normal about weight gain and talking about it#its like if youre not in some constant state of wanting to lose weight people want to kill you#god forbid you want to put on weight to feel more comfortable in your body outside of muscles and a butt#fatphobia is a given thats a whole other few paragraphs#im grateful i have mutuals and friends who are normal but ill have or hear these convos and go#ok i feel sick. why do i feel this way why do you feel that way.#anyways i think fatphobia is one of the worst things to ever happen
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i'm exactly as normal about him as I thought I'd be
#my art#trigun stampede#vash the stampede#trigun#trigun vash#vash#tristamp#trigun stampede fanart#trigun fanart#idk the tags fr this fandom sorry its babys first trigun#im not abandoning jjk but expect more other stuff sprinkled in!! including trigun <333 including him <3#ANYWAY IM SOOOOO NORMAL ABTHIM IM SO NORMAL I PROMISE#im lying im sorry im feral about him i want unspeakable things done 2 him it was over the moment i heard his voice#but [redacted] thoughts aside#hes so fun to draw oh my god how did they make a character Exactly For Me how did they make one that ticks all my boxes#hes blond but like i can work with it i will get good at rendering blond hair for him <333 hes worth it <333333#i was cruisin along mindin my business having fun learning how 2 draw him and then i get 2 the arm . +24hrs to total drawtime#all my cheats ...my safety net of being able 2 use flesh to disguise th fact that u dont reeeeally know where tendons or joints go...#out th window. this prosthetic is practically an anatomically correct model. u can see EVERYTHINg#put my entire me into trying to figure it out h i think it is ok i think i like it#god i rly cant get over how he's just a combination of all the fun parts of drawing yuuji megumi AND gojo#he is the center of their triple venn diagram and i am EATING HIM ALIVE#sorry ill calm down .... fr now.... smile :)
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How Galinda gets ready for bed knowing she's gonna homoerotically argue with Elphaba all night once again

#i know the reason why her hair and makeup are done with when she's in bed in What is this feeling is because its a movie#but obsessed with that fact that she's all done up and then starts the fight that gets them out of bed#and makes sure she's all nice and her hair looks good in her robe before walking over to Elphaba just to say she hates her#like ok Galinda we got it we got it#you definitely hate your roommate#who notably you keep turning to watch while in bed#Elphaba turns away from Glinda#but Glinda turns to face Elphaba#she's so normal about this you guys its normal#wicked#gelphie#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#wicked spoilers#wicked part one#wicked movie
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graph
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#magneto#is this the part where i have to tag everyone because everyone actually is like. semi significant in these. sure JVAELKVJEALK#cyclops#jean gray#beast#iceman#angel#warren worthington iii#hank mccoy#bobby drake#toad#mortimer toynbee#snap sketches#welcome back to Finally Drawing Months-Old Ideas VJELVKJAEKL#I Repeat love how you can tell what comics ive been reading based on what i draw like No Shit but still... lol ...#this comic is so niche but so is most of my stuff jVELAKJA I MADE THIS FOR MEEEE#it has my kids it has toad it has magneto being Unnecessary. this is for ME. also charlie lookin darlin but thats normal anyway#also hi remember how i was complaining about colors from my tablet some days ago.#i didnt realize the 'protective eye' setting was on. which yk makes the screen tinted yellow#LIKE I SAID OUT LOUD TO MY BROTHER 'lol my screen's yellowish' AND IT DIDNT CLICK#i only realized it was on when i went to turn it on at night one night and i was like. Oh 🧍♂️#anyways. sillies. all the kids....#see i thought i was gonna post this WAY earlier but as i was finishing the first version i. well i changed the last panel like three times#but even then i was like 'ok but i wanna draw the boys bein silly..' and indecisive as i was with which version i wanted#i . drew both. and have just made this a goofy two parter or whatever#ANYWAYS !!!! its great bein able to do personal stuff again ... i still have work this to do but its significantly less#so i feel more at ease to do small stuff like this#i do hope to tackle a bigger idea this month tho. while i was drawin this out all i could think of was That idea
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On my bullshit once again, this time with @outkclassed's ford labs au!
I love him :) I was supposed to connect him with some wires in the back, but I have too much fun with him being modular!! Rearranging his ass!! He's contemporary art now <3




You can't be mean to him because he is only three apples tall 🥺🥺

and of course, his place of honor

#gravity falls#bill cipher#gravity falls au#ford labs au#there are now four bills watching me on my computer <- is what i was about to say because i forgot about all the art prints on my wall#there are now four handmade paper bills watc- no that number is still too low. well. four that have eyes. the eyes contain the soul or smth#anyway thisll totally be the last one i think im normal now forever actually yay!!#hes so shiny... which means my camera with automatic sharpening highlights eeeevery little flaw.... augh... he looks great i swear guys#also i like how i say you cant be mean to him right after being mean to him. well its ok he deserves it#i love him <3#my art
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I am a good person. I am a powerful person, I don't believe in evil. I think that evil is an idea created by others to avoid dealing with their own nature. I understand my own nature, good and evil have nothing to do with it.
#this is specifically post canon in a way idk how to articulate and also pertains to super specific headcanons idk how to articulate either.#I'm normal. I'm normal . I'm normal#The implications of Tommy becoming gman didn't do anything to my brain chemistry it's like fine. I'm like. Normal.#[LIE DETECTED]#SORRY . YOU CAN TRY AND ASK ME ABOUT IT BUT ILL PROBABLY JUST. MAKE NOISES AND GESTURE VAUGELY#it's so fucked. It's so fucked up. Oh my god#tommy coolatta#benry#benrey#hlvrai#half life vr ai#half life vr but the ai is self aware#...#tomrey#..........#CAUSE LIKE. OK. its implied gman does Something with Benry at the end of hlvrai. I think he's in some form of stasis like gordon.#do you guys remember. Holly's benry stream. Yeag#BUT LIKE... OKAY.... with Tommy being gman this is again not just some creep keeping anyone in stasis. It's TOMMY.#It's TOMMY and those are his FRIENDS yknow.#Is he protecting benry? Is he protecting everyone else from benry? WHOS TO SAY . who's to say.#I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwww#ouuighhghhh#This could be a companion piece to the Tommy & Gordon one I did months ago. Aoughhh#My art
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terrisas really funny ithink
#kingdom hearts#kh#my art#image id in alt#kh fanart#Saix#saïx#isa#terra#kh terra#terrisa#Moonrocks#<-? I think people call them that sometimes. I think its cute#Kh saix#kh saïx#kh isa#Not tagging this xemsai because its only a little bit about it. I mean xemsais the joke but ykwim#Ok for real though ive been thinking about them these last few weeks and actually they're really cool 2me#Like theres whole “came back wrong” dynamic since isa remembers everything and terras basically a whole different person#And adding onto that saix and xemnas relationship wasnt exactly. Normal. So i could totally see something like isa-#-subconsciously reverting back to how he acted in kh2 while terras like ‘? You dont have to do that?” And like theyre both AFFECTED by-#-xemnas but in different ways and terra can see how xemnas was through isa and augh#Anyway. This is still an akusai house but i think isa can have an unhealthy one sided attachment to a person he barely knows out of their-#-resemblance to someone he ‘sacrificed himself to’ (kh character files words not mine).#It improves the biodiversity.#terraisa
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outbrust
#thinking about ssaimaki again ... soooo nothing's new !!#jk but seriously i've been thinking abt them#bc like on one side u got this guy whos very vulnerable and crashes out at every midly big moment#and on the other is this girl who for all she's been through she doesnt know how to show basic human empathy like a normal person#like he would be crying his heart out and all she would be able to do is like pat his back awkardly LMAOO#the way theyre so similar and so different at the same time oughhhh !!!!! the parallels !!!!!!!!!!!! theyre killing me !!!!!!!!!!!#anyway like the way they show emotions and react to traumatic events is sooooooo#shuichi doesnt let any tear missing and says and does everything he needs on the spot . freaking out as much as he needed to post trial 1#and post der flohwalzer#while maki neglects her feelings sucking it up until her patience runs out#taking as an example kaito's 'death'#when the body was discorvered she didnt show a hint of actually gaf until later on the trial as she crashed out to the oma exisal#and to the fact that she 'killed' kaito#AUGH i hate them aughhh augh#ok this is very long wth im done now i think#drv3#danganronpa#artists on tumblr#art#digital artist#danganronpa drv3#drv3 killing harmony#maki harukawa#harukawa maki#shuichi saihara#saihara shuichi#saimaki#saiharu
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valentine, you're a horse ❤️
#my little pony#mlp g3#wish-I-may#wish-I-might#ok so. I'm gonna ramble for a sec#normally when I post on valentine's day I complain in the tags about being single. but I won't this year!#I've recently realized I'm definitely somewhere on the aromantic spectrum. and that I'm perfectly content without a partner#in the past I've described myself as 'emotionally unavailable' or having 'commitment issues' but neither of those things were ever true#I'm a very loving and loyal person!#I've always been extremely affectionate with friends and family but unable to have the same level of love for potential partners#unsure if I'm just demisexual/demiromantic or actually aroace but I'm definitely not the default settings type of gay lol#I'm a big fan of romance and sex in fiction! but irl? 😅😬 idk about that fam! idk!#hypothetically I would like to have a gf one day and maybe fall in love but now I understand why that may not happen#or atleast is gonna take a while. and that's fine :)#tldr; if your top song on spotify last year was Cupid by Fifty Fifty it's time to do some soul searching lol#happy valentine's day!! 💕
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i just wanted to draw the ave mujica outfits .
#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#nenekasa#<- i like them.#sorry i like mygo + avemuji but cant make fanart of anything im not Fucking Crazy about normally#had to touch it up digitally because i tried coloring a Pen Drawing in with Watercolor. in earnest.#Everything think the announcements gonna be a new unit. I think that would be hilarious and the worst possible timing#Given where everyone else's arcs are but the miku design looked cute so if its jsut a new game that would cheese me#My tag blabbering... what else ... im artfight slacking. my wrist hurts. course selection is next week. SCREAMS#please pray to God i do not have any 8am classes. PLEASE. my college commute takes over an hour. If i have to wake up at 6am i will k#Oh my God i have to go to the dentist tomorrow too please fucking helpme THEYRE GONAN FIDN AMILLION CAVITIES AND KILL ME. AAAAAHG.#Every time theres another proseka broadcast announced i get scared cause i have so many song covers i want in the game but.#I want to draw them first. So that if they Do get added to the game i cna go HEH... >:)....#Thats whyi did skeleton orchestra emnn and scissorhands rks. I want scissorhands in the game reallybad i love that song#3DMV EVEN PLEEEASE but also nothing can too miumes choreography from like a decade ago i wanna do a cosplay performanc eof it someday...#i ❤️ waacking.#actually the one i Really want to draw is ALSO nenekasa. record red save me. ILL DRAW IT OK
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oh, how you drive me crazy!!
#back to the future#bttf#bttf fanart#bttf musical#back to the future musical#lorraine baines#marty mcfly#kit does an art#yeah that’s right it’s absolutely none of my other ideas i said id continue and a completely new unrelated one! yk how it is#every so often i gotta remind you guys i don’t just make silly doodles of dog men all the time#i can lock in on occasion!#this took super duper long so if you could look at it for a little longer that would be appreciated :]#me and my ten thousand blend layers of purple#i love this song there was a point in time where i’d just loop it over and over again like 10 times at least#and it never gets old!#at some point in the future when im no longer animating ten thousand frames i may consider giving some other songs this cover art treatment#but we’ll see#i already have enough art ideas i don’t need more at the moment#no thanks waiter! i’m good (he keeps bringing more to the table despite my request) im. i’m good-#yeah i could’ve waited until valentine’s day to post this but i don’t think it fits considering. yk. that is his mother#speaking of. i better see absolutely no one be weird about this one ok. i have the spray bottle. be normal
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Dad always said I was like him
Meijack and Chilchuck Tims Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui
^ 1: Moony moonless sky, Fatima Aamer Bilal / 2: Bug like an angel, Mitski / 3: Woodtangle, Mary Ruefle / 4: The Third Hour of the Night, Frank Bidart / 5 & 6: FROM THE MAKERS OF "TWO-MOM ENERGY DRINK," IT'S "LET YOUR FATHER DIE ENERGY DRINK,", Daniel Lavery & Cecilia Corrigan / 7: Batman: Year Three (1989) / 8 & 9 : FROM THE MAKERS OF […], Daniel Lavery & Cecilia Corrigan / 10: Wilt, CJ the X / 11: How Do We Forgive Our Fathers, Dick Lourie / 12: Milk and honey, Rupi Kaur / 13: And My Father's Love Was Nothing Next To God's Will, Amatullah Bourdon / 14: Moony moonless sky, Fatima Aamer Bilal / 15: Someday I’ll Love Ocean Vuong, Ocean Vuong / 16: untitled, Joan Tierney v 17: Drunk, The Living Tombstone / 18: unknown
When your father tried his best to provide for you but he worked all the time and even when he was home he was either tired or stressed and he’s always liked to get drunk to relax and cheer up. When you know he values work ethics and respectability so you grew up to be capable and quiet. And when he says you’re like him you’re sort of puzzled, does he really know you so little, or does he know himself so little? But you like the feeling of your father ruffling your hair so you accept it, and still you stand next to your mother just as silent and just as stoic as her during family gatherings. He leaves again and again and when your mother leaves him nothing changes, really. You wonder if it’s more telling that you know him better than he seems to himself or that you don’t know him as much as you wish you did, or that you don’t think about him all that much these days. Out of sight, out of mind. And he’s never really been there, even when he was there, after all.



#It’s ok they do get in touch again and he prob at least lives to 40#Alright I’m ready to be normal about chilchuck again#Spoilers#I guess?#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#meijack#chilchuck’s family#meijack chils#Web weaving#alcoholism#cw alcohol#webweave#A couple more i liked are like a rearview mirror we’re not as close as we appear line and this french one from#Kristina Gauthier-Landry that goes like hands full of trout running up to you / look what i caught look / how much you love me#And this other one about chocolate coins that a dad arriving from work in middle of the night gives the happy little daughter running up#And it’s so anticlimatic and about transactional relationships and oughh ough it’s a good book#I am Chil is a complex absentee father truther sorry. Idc go see my analyses if you want don’t argue w me here#posts for which i am the target audience#Oh oh another one : So were we close? Or was it just the big things that held us together and the small things that let us fall apart?#The word father rotted in my mouth#Bc it’s left there to rot get it get it………..#Sigh. Like father alike daughter#I’m a truther that she’s more like her mom demeanor wise
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tfw when minibosses take you an average of like 8 attempts minimum but then you somehow manage to defeat your fav boss in the entire game on your first try :v
#NAH BC I LOVE HIM SM AND HIS BOSS FIGHT WAS SO ENJOYABLE I WOULD HAVE BEEN OKAY WITH BEING STUCK ON IT FOR WEEKS#AND THE HE FUCKING DIED#god but his 2nd phase animations 😳😳😳 sir...that drop kick one i'm-#it was honestly kinda hilarious#I have never before and probably never again be that locked in#I'm so normal about him#but also like rip bozzo bc I genuinely suck at combat sm how dare you die this quickly#wyatt??? defeating a soulslike boss ???? on their first attempt??!? like that sounds so fake#my gaming skills are incomprehensible to everyone including me#truly court jester on court jester violence at the estella opera house#((yeah yeah he's the king but I think he can multitask))#ok ok that's enough rambling ...can you tell the hyperfixation is back in full swing ywy#this is barely coherent but neither are my thoughts on this game#((also new wyatt haircut for the nearish future))#lies of p#lies of p romeo#lop#lies of p fanart#king of puppets#digital art#my art
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@magnusbae, not expecting I'd follow through, suggested to sketch Anakin but with cat fangs... Things got out of hand.
Also, look! Magnusbae gifted me with a most lovely fic inspired by my art (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) (fic under the cut, 3,800+ words).
That’s it. Anakin had resisted long enough.
All through morning, noon and even dinner. He had done his Katas, had finished his chores, even went through his studies, all without so much as a single comment. He deserves to be commended personally by Master Yoda for being an exemplary Jedi. He deserves to be knighted right this moment seeing how he never even mentioned just how force karked awful his Master’s hair looked like for the past week. Sticking in all directions, it grows in uneven patches, the addition of a beard is somehow making his elegant Master look like a beggar from the streets and that, that is intolerable.
Anakin growls quietly, muscles tense. He knows his Master most likely can feel him staring holes through him, and yet he simply continues reading his datapad, not asking nor looking, radiating calm in the force. Anakin wonders if he could tidy that mess with the power of thought alone. Would that be considered a frivolous use of the force? Even if done in the service of the republic? After all, his Master’s good looks are the cornerstone of the…
Obi-Wan scratches at the back of his head, clearly bothered and Anakin can’t tolerate this anymore, cannot accept this anymore. His tongue is itching something fierce, his hands are sweating, he cannot sit still like there’s fire ants filling his pants and crawling up his spine. He cannot tolerate this. If not for himself, he must do this for his Master. If not for his Master, then for the order. If not for the order, then for the Galaxy. If not for the Galaxy, then for the Force itself. For he can swear by all that he holds dear that the Force itself is embarrassed by his Master being so unkempt, so ungroomed.
Unacceptable. This is absolutely unacceptable. His Master has to always look neat and nice and put together, smelling fresh and looking proper. That’s the only right way for his Master to be. Anakin will not stand for it being any other way. He will not. He will make it right.
His Master ignores the first lick. He often does that, pretends to not notice in the hopes of Anakin stopping after catching himself at his instincts. Oftentimes it works. Oftentimes it is an accident. But not this time. This time it’s very much on purpose and very much intended to continue until Anakin is satisfied with the results. All Anakin needs is for his Master to continue pretending to not notice long enough for him to fix this mess.
Two more licks, lower neck up the scratchy beard and—
“Anakin—” his Master stops pretending so suddenly that Anakin’s tongue moves over his jawline and across the beard in a way that tickles funny. Anakin likes how it feels, rough and interesting, makes him curious about how it’ll feel like to lick across the jawline, where the beard is the thickest.
Knowing he does not have much time before his Master attempts to stop him altogether, Anakin leans in with renewed urgency, tongue ready, mouth starting to water— “Anakin, stop!” a strong hand pushes against his shoulder, moving him a distance away without being as rough as to push.
“Mrrphh!” Anakin protests, pushing against the hand but not fighting it actively. His Master can be so bossy when he gets like this, so unreasonable. The only way to win is to use his words, otherwise his Master might just walk off and hide in his rooms instead. Or worse, go meditate in the halls, where everyone will see this shameful disaster.
“You need the grooming, Master!” Anakin starts with the foundation and heart of his objection. His Master always teaches that it’s important to be able to pinpoint the problem early on and address it quickly so as to not let it fester and become bigger than it must be. Granted his Master spoke of interpersonal disputes however it absolutely does apply here. His Master simply cannot deny this reasoning, ergo, will not be able to dispute it as untrue. “So just let me!” Anakin adds, before his Master could somehow find a way to object.
Can’t his Master see that Anakin is offering him a service? Out of the kindness of his heart, no less. Him enjoying the way his Master’s flavor sits on his tongue, the way it makes all the small hairs on his body stand on end, how it fills him with excitement— His Master’s scent, rich and spiced and safe— how he favors it above all else even when the exotic teas make him sneeze and sneeze— the way a single point of contact would narrow his senses into a single point of focus, clear his mind of all worries— the way his vision relaxes, the way his nostrils flare and he inhales and inhales and inhales— the way his heartbeat peaks and then slows, the way his mouth goes dry and he feels thirsty, hungry even— all that, all that has nothing to do with his altruistic motivations. He’s just looking out for his Master. Obviously, duh.
“Master.” He can hear his own voice, can hear how it takes a whiny note his Master often teases him for. It’s hard to care when he has a goal bigger than his own ego. “Just let me.” He demands, he can hear it and he still doesn’t stop himself from reaching for his Master’s flowing robes, claws catching on the material and making him shudder. Maybe he does need trimming just like his Master insists each time they spar. Maybe Anakin will allow it, if his Master is good and allows him this. Maybe he’d even let his Master groom him too.
The bewilderment in the force clues Anakin on the fact that yes, maybe he did forget to shield, again. He huffs through his nose, wrinkling it. He really doesn’t know what the big deal with this is, doesn’t understand the obsession everyone and especially his Master, has with hiding every single urge and instinct and thought they have. It’s not like he thinks anything he wouldn’t also say out loud. Maybe if the Jedi used less of those shields, it would have been much easier to communicate with them, to bond with them, and maybe then he’d feel less like an outsider, like an odd bird out of its cage.
“Oh Anakin..” Obi-Wan sighs, the tension loosening from his hold against his shoulder, rather than scolding, there’s the hints of the sadness his Master expresses each time Anakin feels alienated in this place. It is not his fault no one understands him, it is not his fault he is different than everyone.
“Master.” Anakin chirps back, rolling his eyes. His Master has the oddest of tendencies to get hung up on the most particular of topics. Anakin not having enough friends, per his Master’s opinion, is one such topic. Nevermind the fact that Anakin had never seen his Master ever share a true conversation with a single person. Other than himself. Of course. His Master does talk to him.
His Master will get fixated on him instead of thinking about himself and nag him to half death. ‘Anakin get more friends’ and ‘Anakin don’t spread the droid parts all across the quarters’ and ‘Anakin I’m a grown man I can groom myself.’ And while some of those things might be true, obviously, the last one is not. “You look like a mess.” Anakin says it to his face, because he and his Master are real friends.
“Thank you Padawan.” His Master answer, no longer sounding sad, instead his voice is dripping with sarcasm. Anakin doesn’t like it, but he supposes it’s better than sadness. “I do not recall asking for your no doubt impeccable sense of— Ahnakin—!” his ranting stops mid warming up when Anakin uses the opening to dart forward and lick him again, from the lowest exposed spot of his neck, up the smooth skin, his rough tongue making a satisfying ‘shh’ sound as it catches at the hair of the beard and smooths it up with his lick. The flavor is… is…
Obi-Wan had used some sort of balm… some sort of synthetic musk that makes Anakin’s brain swim funny and eyes to close and mouth to water even more. He has to swallow down the saliva lest he drool like a hungry Tooka. It’s hard not to, when his Master is so, so, so karkin yummy. He slams his shields up with a clumsy thud in the force, but maybe just a moment too late to cover up that last thought.
“Anakin!” his Master sounds properly scandalized, voice raising to a tone that always makes Anakin’s ears ring uncomfortably and the following lecturing tone is no better. “Cease this nonsense immediately, you must not—"
Anakin licks again. The side of his neck and up to the point where skin meets ear. “Master.” He says there, voice dropping into a purr that morphs into a warning growl he didn’t even think of making, there’s no aggression, only the frustrated warning to not stop him in the middle of something so damn important. Grooming, is important. More than Katas or studies or meditations. Maybe even more than sparring. And Anakin loves sparring.
All Anakin wants is for his Master to sit quietly and let him take care of him. The way he ought to, the way he was meant to do. It’s his job, after all, is it not? He is Obi-Wan’s Padawan, it’s only natural he would tend to his Master, that he would care for him, that he would help him. That just makes sense. That rings true in the force and that’s all Anakin needs to know.
"I will.” He declares, it is no longer a request nor a plea, it is a declaration of intentions. A declaration of intent. He presses his nose at the soft skin under his Master’s ear and inhales, deeply, the scent making him Master-stupid so he says what’s on his mind with no filters, with no thought. “Unless you hate me.” His voice drops softer, he can’t breath, having inhaled too much of the strongest drug known to him. “Then I won’t” he trembles, he waits, if his Master rejects him, if he does hate him for his care, he will, he
“Anakin, this is hardly related, I do not think that—”
The force between them sparks and Obi-Wan’s mouth snaps closed with an audible click of the jaw. There’s a tension and a heating of an eruption that is halted with the calming breeze of spring air, Obi-Wan’s Force Signature covering his own, soothing, embracing, calming. “Very well, Padawan.” Obi-Wan speaks with a voice of a man who’s been worn in battle, sighing out in exhaustion.b “Since you cannot resist your nature, I’ll allow it.“ He pauses, sounding not a little doubtful as he adds the obligatory “Just this once, Anakin.” A final form of giving in, one Anakin is familiar with.
There’s an ‘You should be old enough to know better’ goes unsaid and so Anakin ignores it. It wouldn’t have mattered even if Obi-Wan did say it. He had before, many times, and it never mattered. Anakin somehow doubts it’ll matter even when he grows taller than Obi-Wan. And he will, he just knows it. He will grow tall and strong, and he will always take care of his Master, and Obi-Wan would not be able to argue with that. Because it’ll all make sense. It always does. Everything about them does.
If only his Master understood him better, he’d know that one doesn’t just grow out of wishing to groom those he cares and…loves. This is something that is forever and always. That is something that only grows and deepens, something to be shared and relished. Something he will always give to his Master freely, even if his Master maybe doesn’t…. Really share it in the same way as him. Which is fine. He had decided a long time ago. It is fine.
It is enough that he gets to care for his Master. So he smiles instead and purrs out a sweet “Thank you, Master.” In that respectful manner he knows his Master enjoys hearing. He giggles when he feels his Master’s breath hitching, giggles more when nuzzling against the neck tickles his nose. “This is so horrible.” He complains, wanting his Master to know how strongly he objects to this change, and yet he cannot stop giggling. “Master!” he doesn’t even try to hide his joy from his voice, nevermind from the Force.
His Force Signature is a slow pulse of contentment, securely tucked beneath Obi-Wan’s still. When he licks small licks under Obi-Wan’s ear, he can feel his Master’s breath catching, can feel the way he stops breathing entirely and the soft gasp when Anakin licks at his ear directly, once, twice, a few more times just to test how committed his Master is to this session. Very, it seems. His Master doesn’t object even when Anakin grows bold and nibbles at his earlobe, tugging ever so gently. His Master is always so sensitive around this area, always so jumpy if Anakin stays too long at this spot. It always makes Anakin want to lick there until Obi-Wan loses his composure entirely.
He never does.
At least not too much.
He does want to groom Obi-Wan after all, not only bully him into squirming because he is so damn ticklish there. That is not to say that he is above wanting to see his pristine Master squirming a little. So he licks there again, and when his tongue dips only a little into the ear, his Master finally jumps and moves away, breathing harshly and looking redder than his hair.
“Anakin I do believe that my hair is not located in that particular spot and—” his hands close on Anakin’s shoulders when he makes it to the ear again, wanting to nibble just one more time, just one last time… “Anakin.” His Master’s firm voice snaps him back into focus, tells him gently through the force to not overdo it. Fine, fine. He will not overdo it. This time.
"Just relax, Mastah.” Anakin pouts, the word slurring in the way his Master always corrects. Always, but not now. Anakin reaches for his Master’s wide shoulders and waits a moment until his Master’s grip loosens enough for him to actually move. It’s easy enough to shift to his Master’s lap. One knee over and sitting down in one smooth motion that has a practiced finesse to it. You either get to Obi-Wan’s lap swiftly, or you don’t at all. There is no room for hesitation for his Master will do enough hesitating for the both of them. So he sits down and nudges closer, right away. Inhaling, inhaling deeper.
Oh how he wants their scent to become one. They’re already nearly inseparable, living as closely as they do, using the same soaps, eating the same foods. Anakin wants more. Anakin wishes that they could smell and feel like one. United. Clearly bonded. Even more than they are through the force. He wants it so much that his fangs itch, itch, itch to bite and bite and bite. But no. No he is here to groom, to care. Not to bite, not to… mark. His cheeks are warm with it, knowing that he has, and is, constantly considering this. Wondering about this, curious about this. About marking his Master in a way that will be known, in a way that will be understood. He thinks about it, always. Luckily his Master has no clue. Luckily, Obi-Wan does not know. Or he wouldn’t let him sit here so carelessly, surely, he wouldn’t.
“It’s part of it, duh.” Anakin says without truly knowing what he speaks of. The grooming, the licking, the biting, the sitting on the lap? He doesn’t know. He only knows of the happy, loud purr that fills his lungs when Obi-Wan doesn’t stop him from leaning back in, back to his neck, nuzzling, smelling, licking up that rough, funny tasting beard and to his hair, spiky and significantly softer than the beard. He giggles again, and purrs. It’s an odd combination of sounds he does try to stop but doesn’t manage. He is too preoccupied for dignity, or decorum, or class. He’s too karking pleased.
When he licks at his Master’s neck again, the man tilts his head up and away, exposing his throat for him. Good. Good. Good, great, awesome.
His Master couldn’t have displayed his trust more plainly than this. No words could have conveyed the same level of commitment, of confidence and belief. Exposing one’s throat, Anakin thinks, is a universal sign. Even if his Master is less inclined to instincts as Anakin is, it still counts, it still matters a whole lot that he does it for him. His Master does it because he knows it matters to him and that— that matters more than all else.
His own purring is deafening, drumming in his eardrums and filling his chest with sound, he used to try to hide this in the past when he realized that most Padawans did not purr at every one of their Master’s compliments or gestures of kindness. He no longer bothers. He pulls and licks and purrs some more. He takes his time, licking small, measured licks, taking care to put that awful messy beard into something much neater, dignified.
“Maste-rrr.” He draws the ‘R’, nuzzling again under the ear and grinning when his Master shudders but doesn’t pull away, he always gives him a chance to be good. So he will be good. He does not nibble, instead he wraps his lips carefully around the bit of skin where no hair touches. Oh he wants to suck, to mark, to taste. Oh he does, so much. But he doesn’t. He will be good, because his Master believes him to be good, and proper, and nice. So he will be.
His cheeks are fire hot when he thinks about what else he would have liked to be doing instead of the promised grooming. That is not something he should be thinking of, nor something his Master would ever permit, but…
Thinking is not illegal and he is not good at not thinking.
So he imagines it. Imagines how his Master’s hands would feel on his hips, imagines his Master yanking him down to sit properly on his lap, Imagines his Master wanting him to lick elsewhere and—
“Ahnakin—” Obi-Wan protests, so strongly it rings in the force with his words. He feels and looks scandalized, even more so than before. He looks like he is considering all his choices and decisions. He looks like he’s about to call quits. He looks like he’d push Anakin away, he— places his hands on Anakin’s hips and pulls him down, to sit properly.
The whine that escapes Anakin’s lips is nothing short of mortifying. It’s a needy, surprised thing, he feels like a proper youngling, confused and shy. He seeks the refuge of his Master’s neck and hides there, nuzzling while whining again, complaining, scandalized too by his Master’s audacity to follow his dreams up like this. He can’t mean it, he simply can’t! It is a mere coincidence, his Master would never follow his fantasies, he didn’t even hear it, his shields are up and proper, he’s sure of it, he’s sure of it, he’s…
“Sorry…” Anakin murmurs out, because if he’s honest, he is not sure if his shields are worth anything with how excited he had gotten. Maybe his Master did hear, maybe his Master did feel something. Maybe he did push a little too hard. He doesn’t want to push too hard, he knows that sometimes his Master gets nervous because of his thoughts. Not angry, never angry.
He doesn’t want to make his Master nervous, he can feel the tell-tales of it in the force. Despite his Master’s secure hold on him, despite his Master’s unmoving frame. He can feel the building up hesitation. He does not want his Master to feel that way with him.
“I’ll stop.” He promises his Master, assures him. He’ll try to, anyway. For his Master he’d try to go against his nature, even if his nature does tell him to think and do all sorts of things. Sometimes, in the quiet of the night when he can’t sleep and he thinks of his Master and every word they had ever passed, he does wonder about this. Is this truly his nature, his instincts that drive him to act as he does, or is it simply how he is with his Master? He suspects he knows the answer to that, but it’s easier for the both of them to call it instincts and be over with it, so he never disputes it. “Really.”
There’s a charged silence and then, blessedly, his Master says the two words Anakin loves more than anything else in the world, the two words for which he, not jokingly, thinks he might be willing to die for.
“Good boy.”
The Coruscanti accent is thick and rolling, he sounds almost distracted, he sounds…
Anakin shuts his eyes and bites his tongue, fangs digging into the soft flesh. He must not think of exactly how he imagines his Master sounding. He should not think about how his hands feel warm and human on his hips. He should not think about the lingering flavor on his tongue nor how his lungs are full of Obi-Wan, of his Master. He should not, is not allowed to. Promised not to. Instead he wraps his arms around his Master’s neck and hugs him, pulling the larger man to himself, having his head against his chest for a few long moments in which he is sure Obi-Wan hears just how fast his heart goes. He surely can feel it through the bond, it’s going crazy, ba-dum, ba-dum.
He can feel a distant echo of his own heartbeat, almost imperceptible to his senses, and yet there. An answer. Thoomp-thoomp.
When he leans back, he moves his hands to cup his Master’s cheeks and makes him tilt his head up, to face him. “You look good now,” His fangs stretch at his lips as he grins wide enough to hurt. “Master!” he adds, cheekily.
His Master’s eyes are a bright blue, the deepest, calmest pond. He rolls them shortly, then looks directly into Anakin’s own eyes and smiles at him, sarcasm dripping with fondness as he says “Thank you. Ah-nah-kin.” With the most accented tone Anakin had ever heard. There’s so much black in his Master’s eyes, a beautiful, wondrous thing that makes him itch all over and want to see more of that soft darkness no one else gets to see.
No one else, but him.
#obikin#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#mayhem art#magnusbae#Magnus Mayhem Art#star wars#sw art#anakin skywalker fanart#anakin fanart#anakin#obiwan#obi wan and anakin#star wars fanart#star wars fanfiction#obikin fic#cat anakin#AHHHHH what to say what to say. I'm so excited by this gift that it makes me speechless :)). I'm not normal about this ok??? I did NOT expe#Magnus to pull such an insane move. ON THE KARKING GO. I shared the wips and frighteningly fast got this delicious thing in return!#and I haven't recovered since!#Magnusbae. I love this revised version as much as I love the raw original one. I'm cradling them both like beloved twins :))).#Thank you so so much for thisssss (⸝⸝⸝• ω •⸝⸝⸝) ♡#nyanakin
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saying this as respectfully as possible but. Do not put fandom content creators on a pedestal. We are also just fans contributing to a community just as you are. We have boundary on our own work and that’s it. What I say is not and should not be considered sth the whole fandom should listen to. I’m just a normal ass person ranting about things on my blog. If it does not have a fandom tag for others to engage in, do not make it out to be me trying to start fights or addressing the whole community. Because it’s not.
I’ve said it before and I will say it again, my art, my lore talk, is biased. I’ve never tried to hide that I view Marika a certain way and will always develop my theory following that base assumption.
Aside from translation stuffs and pointing out in-game items, everything else I say you can look at it, agree or disagree, and move on to form your own opinions. Just because I draw stuffs doesn’t mean you get to saddle me with responsibilities about managing fandom expectations. What the hell? I’m a fan artist, I’m the last person who you should look at for “leaderism” (?) WHAT?
I can and will be a hater in my own space, like I know sometimes other artists will just post their stuffs and not engage too heavily with fandom, and for a while I did try to do that here (because I’m already a dramatic ass on twitter), that’s just not me though.
You will get art and you will get my opinions as well.

#asking ppl to [celebrate different takes] is... WHAT?#different takes as in well I think she likes apples and you think she likes grapes. yeah that’s some fun discussion to be have#but different takes as in the fundamental of a character’s drive and personality??? NO#let’s put that down very clear here#I can still read fics where Marika is cold and calculate and manipulative as long as I can see there’re layers to it and the author#set it up in a way that I can see they got her backstory and build those layers based on that#and then there are ppl who literally only portray her as omg evil girlboss 101 let’s blame everything on this cardboard character#then I click back.#and there r ppl who might not vibe with how i portray her and they can ignore me. THAT'S OK TOO. we r in our own space.#it’s as simple as that!#ever since the dlc is out i literally could see the amount of ppl blocking me go up and im just “ok” because i do go around muting ppl too.#that's normal fandom space managing experience. pls do that#lore discussion is for ppl to engage in so u say ur piece i say mine and we can continue or not depending on situation#but FANWORK? leave each other alone or be a hater in ur own space ok?#personal#also where are these ppl who have been defending Marika at... because if u exclude me#and some others i can count on one hand. where are these ppl?#ppl saying headass stuffs about the HS aren't even Marika fans or engage too much in fandom to begin with#meanwhile u can't even find one youtube lore essay that says anything good about her#ppl are even trying to give Messmer's mother position to GEQ for no goddamn reason#like where is this overwhelming support for Marika at cuz as the active Marika stan around im not seeing it
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