#like theres a lot of cruel things in this series but this has to be one of the worst

[foxstens]

never not thinking about how kevin day is david wymack's son

imagine you're kevin, practically born with a racquet in your hand, you grow up with your mother for a while and maybe you ask about your father and she tells you not to worry about it, or maybe you just never ask because she doesn't mention it and you don't know how important it is, yet. then she dies, you're moved to evermore, it's so different from what you've seen previously but you have no choice so you just bow your head and do your best to survive, clinging onto your mother's sport, clinging onto the idea that you'll become a star.

you're there for so long you eventually forget you've ever been outside of it, but you see how desperate riko is for his father's attention so you start wondering, however briefly, about the concept of a father.

then you're in high school, you find the letter and suddenly it's not just a vague concept you have to wonder about, suddenly it's something real and tangible. you've heard of david wymack, it would've been impossible not to since he was a friend of your mother's and considering the kind of team he's taken up to creating, maybe you've even met him extremely briefly at some point. you know enough about the industry to think his team isn't just a publicity stunt, and somehow you know that if he finds out he'll do everything in his power to get you out.

you're not stupid enough to tell riko this, but you do tell jean and he laughs at you. of course he does. but you've been there for too long, you've seen too much, and you're old enough to understand what the master would do if he deemed david wymack to be a threat. you can't leave riko's side therefore you can't tell him any time soon, possibly ever, so you resolve to reading the letter over and over instead. (riko reads it almost as often as you)

then you're 19 and the erc thinks riko is holding you back. you're 19 and you're watching riko stomp on everything you've built up through the years. you're 19 and the letter is the only reason you have the strength to leave.

you tell wymack and the team as much as you dare because they deserve to know the risks of having you here, and wymack takes it in stride, he puts himself and his team at risk and even takes out loans to keep you here, like you knew he would. he signs you and he deserves to know about the letter, the more time passes the worse it'll be when you do tell him, but you can't yet because it's too soon and you don't trust yourself to tell riko no when the time comes.

then neil is asking for your help

now imagine you're wymack. your childhood was shit and you didn't have the support you needed at the time, but you believe you can be better than the hands that shaped you. kayleigh taught you everything you know about exy, and you loved her so it stung when she died and you couldn't be there for her only son. but, no matter what you might think of tetsuji moriyama, you don't think kayleigh would send her son to an unsafe place. you just go on with your days, maybe tune in on the news to see that kevin's doing well. you have no reason to think otherwise.

when you have the opportunity to start an exy team from scratch, you dedicate it to the kids that need another chance, the kids the world has given up on. you'll never give up on them.

then, what feels like a lifetime later, kevin day is standing in front of your hotel room and asking you for help. he's saying his 'beloved brother' broke his hand, he's saying the moriyamas are part of the yakuza, he's saying they'll kill him if they find him. throughout the year you get to know him better, you see that he's grown up to be a caged and abused wreck, you see he was raised to care about nothing but exy, you see him having a panic attack at the mere mention of having to face his former team, you see him drinking himself to oblivion to cope. you can't undo the past so you do your best to support him now, but damn if you don't wish you could've been there for him.

then he's telling you he's your son

[alltoolewis]

Enough for you (part 1) - Mason Mount

I missed you guysssss..... finally logged back into my account after 2 months and began typing & I'm so happy!!!! I am sorry for the absent, uni and my personal life has been a living hell but I am back for now to speak and write to all you lovely lot... which I've just now discovered I now have 2,000 followers! Thank you soooooooo much I really can't believe it

This one isn't the best as I'm a little rusty but I think it's a good opener for a new series I am going to write! Currently it's called 'enough for you' however this might change the more I write of it! The next part will be uploaded tomorrow but for now feel free to fill my inbox with 'hello's' and questions as I missed you all sooooooooo much! Enjoy 💕

Summary- After your dad, frank lampard, gets assigned to manage his old team again and wants you to join him as the head counsellor, your mind fills with dread and flashbacks of a possible reunion with your ex...

“Theres no way…” You whispered, staring at your father in disbelief as he spoke the words that you thought you’d never hear again “Your managing Chelsea… again”.

“Only for the rest of the season, it’s nothing permanent yet” You could hear his own surprise in his voice, as if he too couldn’t believe what he was saying. “But it went awful last time” You gasped “Why would they want you back?”

 “Cheers kiddo, I needed that confidence boost…” rolling his eyes he came closer to you, ruffling your hair slightly before walking pass you towards the kitchen.

“I didn’t mean it like that dad” You sighed, following him “They just treated you so badly last time… is it worth it?” It’s not that you didn’t want your dad to go back into managing his old team, of course you wanted him too! Goosebumps rose on your own arms just thinking about Frank Lampard’s, your dads, big return to Stamford bridge. But the excitement fades away quickly once you the memories of last time flood in your mind.

The headline that he left…

The face he made when he got the call…

The hours and hours he spent preparing to head HR to fight a losing battle…

Seeing the nervousness in your eyes, he wrapped his arms around you “Theres no need to panic, eh? It’s a couple of weeks that’s all… they need me”.

Sighing, you knew that he was right. You didn’t have to live under a rock to know how poor Chelsea was at the minute. “I suppose you couldn’t make them any worst than they are…” You giggled, a smirk on your face as you pulled away from the hug, his laugh echoing across the marble walls of the kitchen “That’s the spirit! Now let’s get a glass of wine to celebrate our return!”

Just as you were about to grab the glasses, you froze “Our return…”

“Yeah, that’s the thing…” Your dad spoke hesitantly “The board had asked if you’d also come back as the head of the wellbeing team. All the players and staff have been going through a rough time and really need a team on site to help… that’s why they need you!”

Working for Chelsea was the first job you had ever gotten when you graduated from university with a counselling degree. It obviously helped that your dad was the manager of the team, however every loved having you around and you loved being there. But when your dad got fired from the team in such a cruel way and the management of the team collapsing, there was no way that you were going to stay… so you left with him… despite everything you were leaving behind… despite leaving him!

“No way dad!” You quickly rejected, placing the glasses back down as you headed back into the living room “I am happy for you, I really am! But I’m not going back!”

“Why not?”

“I have a job!”

“You can leave it” He pushed, causing your eyes to widen “I can’t just leave my job dad! What am I supposed to say, ‘sorry guys I’m going to work with my dad for a few weeks and then I’ll return when they throw us away again’”.

“They never asked you to go” Your dad interjected. It was true, if anything the team wanted you to stay more than Frank!

“They wanted you to leave… so I did too! End of!”

“(y/n) …” Frank spoke hesitantly “This isn’t about Mason, is it?”

You didn’t realise your body could go more into shock than before until he spoke his name. The name that at one point caused your heart to burst into a thousand butterflies, but now makes it shatter into a million shards of glass that was impossible to piece together again…

“No” You spoke just above a whisper, trying to convince not only your dad but yourself. It wasn’t a secret that you were once in love with Chelsea’s number 19… to the public it might have been but to everyone in your life it was clear to see the effect that his presence had on you, and even now almost 2 years later remains on you! You were perfect together, the mix of your existences together had meaning, a love so strong that it could be seen a mile away… that was until he broke your heart.

“Don’t lie to me (y/n)” Frank sighed “Why else wouldn’t you come back?”

“Why do you even care about that?” You exploded, anger tracing in your veins “You hated us together… it was one of the reasons he broke up with me!”

Flashback

“What do you mean you can’t do this anymore?” You breathed out, looking over to him as he placed his hands over his face in anger, sitting on the edge of the sofa. What was supposed to be a night enjoying watching your boyfriend play in one of the toughest tournaments in football, turned into a surprisingly sour one. The second you returned home from the win, Mason turned bitter, his face scrunched together in thought as he refused to acknowledge your presence. “You won Mase… I don’t what is wro-“

“We’re wrong!” he screamed back, standing up from the sofa as he turned to face you “It’s not about the game… It’s about us!”

“Mason I don’t know what you mean?!?” you shouted back, confusion etched in your voice as he huffed “Us, (y/n) … it shouldn’t be happening it can’t happen!”

“We’ve been together for months Mason! Why now?”

“People are going to find out about us and then what? I’m just the player who got in the team cause he’s shagging his managers daughter!”

“Who cares what they say?!” You pushed “Who gives a fuck? I’m happy, your happy… my dad’s okay with it!”

“Oh please!” He laughed sarcastically as you raised your eyebrows in confusion “Your dad hates us together and you know it!” “He did at first but not anymore” You tried to convince him, knowing that it did indeed take your dad awhile to warm to the idea “He accepts us Mason… so what’s this really about because I know what you are saying is full of shit!”

Mason turned back around, not wanting you to see any more of the cracks showing “I’m telling the truth (y/n)!”

“No. Your. Not.” You said, voice getting angrier and angrier “You wouldn’t do this now, you wouldn’t end us over something so simple… so easy to fix! So what is it?”

“I CHEATED OKAY!” he shouted back, causing your heart to stop. “Your lying…” You mumbled, shaking your head as you refused to let the tears go “Your lying… you’d ne-never do th-that to me… with who?”

“Does it matter?” He sighed, pulling his hair as he glanced over to what once was your happy figure, but is now destroyed. “Yes it does…” You whispered, a tear ruining down your cheek against your will “of course it does, so with who?”

“Just a girl at the club” he spoke with no emotion “I got drunk, she was there, it happened”

“Why?”

“Why what?” He tutted “Why did I fuck her? Like I just said, we got drunk she was there, you wasn’t it’s that easy-“

“No… not that” You stopped him, not wanting to hear anymore “Why wasn’t I good enough for you?”

Your words caused him to freeze as he stopped his pacing, and for a moment you could of sworn you seen the cracks to yet another lie but of course it was hidden quicker than it was seen “You know what they say… the game is the game, and sometimes your just not good enough to play!”

His words caused your body to tense up like you just got a million paper cuts, you wanted to push him… to fight him… to prove that the crack you seen was a lie, a doubt… but why would you, when the man you loved, the man you thought was your haven, just told you that you weren’t good enough.

Without another word, you nodded, walking past him to collect your belongings. Only once you were past him did you let the tears run…

“Mason?” You whispered, needing to say one more thing to him before you left

“Yes…” You didn’t look at him when he replied but you knew he was crying… but why?

“Thank you for letting me play the game with you…” and with that you left… one of you hoping to see the other one again while the other one prayed.

End of flashback

 A shiver ran down your back as you remembered the horrid memory, but it was brushed off as your dad began to speak again “I didn’t hate you together!” He protested, sitting beside you on the couch “Did I hate the idea of my oldest child falling in love? Yes. Did I hate the idea that one of my best players was seeing my daughter behind my back? Of course.”

“dad…” You tried to stop him, but he obviously ignored you.

“But did I hate seeing my daughter so happy? No.” tears streamed down your face as he spoke the truthful words “I know it hurt you. The hiding… the breakup… the secrecy. But that’s what love is, and deep down I know he really did love you.”

“Then why did break up with me then?” you sniffled “If he really loved me that much then why?”

“That’s something we’ll never know unless you speak to him.”

Of course you didn’t tell your dad he cheated on you, although after the reveal you couldn’t stand to even look at him, your love overpowered the hatred of ruining his relationship with your dad and his chances of remaining in the first team.

“I’m not seeing him dad… no matter what I’m not facing him again” Your body went into reject mode at the idea of just seeing him, nevermind having a vulnerable conversation with him. “I’m not asking you too honey, he can be booked in with someone else and you’ll have your own office… but please come back with me? I need you”.

 ‘I need you’

The three words that held so much but little meaning. The three words that you held onto so tightly for so many years. The three words that you can never refuse.

“Fine…” You sighed, as your dads’ arms wrapped around you once more in celebration. “Thank you… thank you… thank you! The teams going to be so happy…”

“You don’t have to thank me, I’d do anything for you and you know that” You chuckled, getting off the couch to collect the glasses you put down a lifetime ago “but dad?”

“Yes?”

“You make sure Mason Mount stays the hell away from me!”

[lesbixch]

i was reading someones post on sayaka here and i generally agreed w it but i wanted to write my own thoughts on sayaka, reading her as a young girl who... fundamentally hates herself. like i think ppl dont notice that she doesnt like herself in the beginning of the story and they think it comes out of nowhere. but her self hate motivates literally everything she does in pmmm. i think people miss that the cause effect structure here, thinking that sayaka does things and that makes her hate herself. to me it is more that sayaka hates herself, therefore she does things to punish herself, to self harm, to self sabotage, and occasionally scrambles to do something for other people to try to drown out that self hate - which of course rarely works. not very coherent, but heres 5 points under the cut

discussion of suicide self harm and depression tw

1. in the background of pmmm, sayaka has known kyosuke since they were little. presumably she started liking him bc he was good at violin and she.... probably wasnt. she was kinda sorta friends w him but not really, and pmmm (and hitomi) make it very clear that she has struggled w confessing to him. this already hints at her not having high self esteem. when she tries to make him feel better after his accident, she brings him CDs to listen to in the hospital. im reading into it but i genuinely dont think sayaka thinks of herself as interesting enough to just TALK to kyousuke while hes there. she NEEDS another thing to take the attention off her - music - to even interact w him. she doesnt think that her presence, her being there as a FRIEND is going to cheer him up all that much. like she brings up music as a conversational topic and physically brings CDs for kyousuke to listen to enough times that HE starts interpreting it as some kind of cruel joke shes playing on him. this to me is a sign that she does not like herself, and she doesnt understand why other ppl would like her as a person either, unless she was doing something for them.

(theres also smth to be said abt how much of her crush on kyosuke is bc she likes HIM as a person, rather than his talent, or after his accident, the idea that she can help him and feel useful herself. in some sense she tries to use him to feel valued and not hate herself. it doesnt work)

the important part here is that theres already signs that sayaka doesnt like herself, she doesnt have much self esteem, and she attempts to boost her self esteem by doing things for other people.

2. so sayaka doesnt really like herself. in the early eps, she talks about how unfair it is that people like her have a safe life and are offered a wish while many others struggle without having the same opportunity. extrapolating here, you can make the argument that sayaka doesnt like herself and doesnt think herself deserving of the happy safe life that others want so much. to be offered a wish on top of it feels like yet another thing to hate abt herself. she doesnt deserve a wish! she has not suffered enough to get a wish! shes guilty over it! shes safe, shes well fed, she has a roof over her head, and her self hate warps her mindset in such a way that she thinks of being offered a wish not as a happy fortunate event, but as something that reveals that she is stupid. she quite literally frames her caution around making a wish as being stupid and naive.....

there isnt really the language about 'deserving' in this scene, thats me reading into this a lot, but i do think later eps fit the same general theme. sayaka is a hero of justice fighting witches to save other people, but do other people deserve to be saved? (cough cough ep8 train scene). does she deserve to be saved? does she deserve to have a happy life? does she deserve to try a relationship with kyousuke? does she deserve to have madoka as a friend? does she deserve to be treated with kindness/pity by kyoko? i'd argue that the wish conversation in ep2 sets up these series of questions about what sayaka deserves pretty well. this scene, this early on, tells us that sayaka already feels guilt at being safe and okay. why should she be happy or safe when other people suffer. it just takes a little more self hate to push her into "i dont actually deserve to be happy or safe", which drives her self harm self hate spiral later.

3. sayakas attempts desperately to feel better abt herself by doing things for other people. early on she takes on the role of madokas protector, driving homura away with the fire extinguisher and promising to beat homura up - mami laughs and is like Anyway if something happens ill be there to protect you, which sayaka gets upset at. its played for laughs, and yet, if we take seriously the way that sayaka builds her self esteem up as a protector (of madoka, of kyosuke, of the people, of justice), it does smart a little. of course sayaka would be inclined to become a magical girl if it means she can protect others, which mami implies she cannot quite do as a regular girl. later sayaka wants to help mami - she brings a bat to a witch fight - and fails to help mami in any way in ep3. her helplessness, her guilt, her self hate all factor into her decision to become a magical girl. only then can she truly protect people right? only then will she be actually worth something, will she deserve to be alive?

now that ive argued my point that theres seeds planted early on that sayaka doesnt like herself, doesnt have self esteem, thinks of herself as worthless if she doesnt do things for others - it casts all her later actions as self sabotaging and self harming, and purposefully so, even if sayaka may not call it that. she takes the actions she takes bc she doesnt like herself, and it fuels her self hate, and she spirals into more and more self destructive actions in turn.

4. sayaka is weak as a magical girl - kyoko shows her that - and she is no longer needed by kyousuke, so her attempts at helping and protecting people fail to make her feel better. if shes weak, she cant protect people, and thus shes worthless. if she wishes for kyousuke to be healed, and he doesnt know, he wont thank her, and he wont like her, and he wont need her since the healing is already done. because sayaka fundamentally hates herself and thinks herself worthless, one act done to help someone isnt nearly enough to make her love or even value herself. especially when she can never be recognized for it.

(hitomi fits in here too - she will never know sayaka outright saved her in ep4, and sayaka will never get recognition or gratitude for it. instead, from sayakas POV, hitomi will basically betray her for it)

and heres where the spiraling/cyclical hate kicks in. she hates herself, so she thinks it selfish and horrible to ask for recognition/gratitude/being liked back in turn. but because she hates herself, she needs external recognition, gratitude, being liked back in turn to feel better about herself, to not feel worthless. she hates herself, so she doesnt talk to kyousuke at all (she doesnt deserve it), but not getting his attention, recognition, gratitude, kindness etc also makes her hate herself. she cant win, bc she cannot let herself win.

when hitomi brings up kyousuke, sayaka feels a burst of regret for saving her, and it fuels her self hate yet again - magical girls cant wish death on people!! she cant accept hitomis compromise to allow sayaka to confess first, bc she is ashamed of being a soulless husk. but she cant just accept that hitomi and kyousuke might get together bc... she wants to be needed and liked by them, especially kyousuke. she doesnt want to be a burden, a third wheel, a forgotten worthless friend. she wants to be special to someone, namely kyousuke. she wants to be needed and liked this desperately bc... she hates herself. huh! everything seems to come down to sayaka hating herself at the root of it !! she sabotages herself bc she hates fundamentally herself!!! if there is an option for sayaka to be better, she refuses it because she doesnt deserve to feel better, even if she wants to be better on some level - bc she hates herself !!!!!!!

relatedly, at any point in time, sayaka can ask for help from homura or madoka (or at least try), but she refuses to, bc she thinks she doesnt deserve it. she hates that she is weak enough to need help, it makes her hate herself more. kyubey plays on this by talking abt how much more powerful madoka would be as a magical girl than sayaka, and sayaka starts feeling resentful and jealous, and that fuels her self hate even more. i interpret the scene in ep8 where she lashes out at madoka as partially her resentment boiling up, but also partially a cry for help. she cannot ask for help the regular way, she can only do so in this indirect "well if ur so powerful why dont u take my place and suffer for me huh???" way, and it still fuels more self hate - this time not bc shes weak enough to be asking madoka to bail her out, but bc she purposefully hurts madoka. we can also interpret this scene as sayaka purposefully lashing out to drive madoka off bc she doesnt deserve to be with madoka anymore - a hollow husk, weak, worthless, and now feeling jealousy and resentment and not just self hate but hate towards hitomi, kyousuke, madoka. she could never deserve madokas kindness.

5. sayaka kind of knows shes self harming. shes def aware of it even if she wont admit it to other ppl. like i think she very purposefully does things that will hurt her bc, at her very core, she believes she deserves to hurt. she fundamentally hates herself and so will hurt herself and sabotage her relationships. she doesnt deserve to be safe, she doesnt deserve to not hurt, she doesnt deserve happiness, she doesnt deserve other peoples kindness. ive seen people frame it more as her blundering into yet another thing that spikes her self hate, and i just disagree with that. ive used the word purposefully in this post a bajillion times bc i think to a large extent sayaka is very cognizant of the actions shes taking. she knows being w madoka and asking for help would be better in the long run, but she purposefully doesnt do it. its self punishment, its self harm, its self sabotage so she gets even worse. its penance, and her wrongdoing is existing in the first place.

she actively and purposefully destroys her relationships, and refuses help. its an active choice, and she knows she will feel worse bc of it, but bc she hates herself and thinks herself undeserving, she carries out all these choices and actions. i think when people dont think deeply on this, they feel like sayaka is acting stupid bc "why doesnt she just do X, shes acting so stupidly" etc. but in sayakas mindset everything shes doing is crystal clear. there is no way other than to make herself suffer more and more.

its bc its framed as a willful, purposeful descent into suicidal depression that i see sayakas depression as one of the most meaningful arcs to me. i think when you are mentally ill and severely depressed, all her actions make intuitive sense. she starts out not liking herself, and everything onward is just her fueling her own self hate. thats how depression functions. it feels irrational on the outside and completely rational and sensical to the person carrying out these actions. her mindset is severely warped ofc - im not even gonna get into how her blackwhite thinking abt justice and fairness factors into this - but it makes sense to her. she doesnt see this as "i am depressed and i hate myself and i am getting more and more suicidal", but more so as "oh. im a worthless shell of a person who has never deserved anything! i cannot let myself strive for happiness in life". sayaka is not bumbling into this as a hapless victim, shes charging into suicide bc she cannot see a way out, and she cannot let herself see a way out. shes wallowing, shes punishing herself, shes sabotaging herself to the point where she wants to die more than she wants to live, and where she curses the world as a witch more than she wishes for something as a magical girl.

so much of madoka is abt agency to me, and that includes sayaka. im not saying depression is a choice, but self destruction IS - this is reflected in madokas own apotheosis/deification/enlightenment, whatever u call it. its again a question abt whether u would make a choice (or a wish) without knowing fully it entails. would you commit suicide if you knew things would get better? if you knew that you werent worthless, if you could believe it? i (maybe wishfully?) like to believe that sayaka gets to know this in rebellion - that there is a way for her to exist without constant pain and self hate, that living isnt something that is deserved but something that everyone should have, that she has people who care for her - and it makes her much less self destructive in turn.

[ezziefae]

My thoughts on Jude & Cardan becoming parents in the stolen heir duology!

I’m aware this topic has become a huge debate in the fandom. Everyone has their own opinions on this. But i’d like to share my ideas of how holly black would most likely handle this trope in her writing.

I see both sides of the debate, and i’m here to clear things up….hopefully!

First of all, i really don’t think holly would write pregnant jude.

HEAR ME OUT!! 🏃🏻🏃🏻

If anything, i see holly black writing a time skip to jude and cardans kids grown up, as teenagers. the pregnancy trope isn’t something i see holly writing at all. There wouldn’t be a lot of action if jude were pregnant.

I have lots of questions after reading the stolen heir, but no matter what happens in the second book (The prisoners throne” coming out 2024) i hope jude and cardan stay monarchs of Elfhame. no matter what.

And that being said…jude and cardan would HAVE to have children, who can grow up and eventually take their place as the new monarch of elfhame. it has to happen eventually, but it doesn’t have to happen in “The prisoners throne”

Holly already confirmed that she will be writing a lot more books that will be set in faerie/elfhame. Meaning new characters will be introduced, or side characters will have their own story. If jude DOES become pregnant, it will probably only be mentioned from someone else’s point of view. But it wouldn’t be shown.

In conclusion, i don’t believe holly would write pregnant Jude. specially in the second book of the stolen heir. It would be rushed. Jude and cardan would have been together romantically for 8 years, (TSE time period from TQON)and if they decided to keep ruling elfhame, then there would be no rush for them to have kids.

⚠️ THE STOLEN HEIR SPOILERS ⚠️

"The Folk adore Cardan, and they're terrified of my sister, two excellent things. I hope they rule Elfhame for a thousand years and then pass it down to one of a dozen offspring."

- Oak (The Stolen Heir)

Since the folk of the air series, we have known that Oak has never wanted to rule Elfhame. It’s clear that he hasn’t changed his mind, and he definitely won’t. He even wants jude and cardan to have kids, and believes he doesn’t have to be involved.

We know that Faerie women struggle to get pregnant. Since Jude is mortal, she can easily carry. Jude can restore the greenbrair family line. I don’t think holly would throw that opportunity away. So i definitely see jude and cardan being parents, but probably 20-50 or 100 years from now (in the world of elfhame obviously, as long as jude stays in faerie, she will live forever) theres absolutely no rush!

With the events that have taken place in the end of the stolen heir 🏃🏻💀…i’m scared and excited to see what holly black will do with oak and suren.

I don’t think people should worry about the pregnancy trope. I also know that people don’t want jude and cardan to be parents because it would be “out of character for jude & cardan”

let me remind you, in the folk of the air series, jude and cardan are teenagers/young adults, from the cruel prince, to HTKOELTHS. The stolen heir duology, is an 8 year time skip from TQON. MEANING, that jude and cardan will be more mature than they used to be. They’re ADULTS now. I heard someone say that they heard Holly black say during TSH tour that ‘she still has no idea how to write adult cardan.’

Meaning that holly is going to write adult jude and cardan. Giving us a more mature version of them. this doesn’t mean cardan won’t be his usual self, he’s going to keep being funny, and clever, but in a more mature way.

I’m excited to see what holly black does with the characters in the prisoners throne. i hope she can keep jude and cardan monarch of elfhame. But no matter what Holly decides to do, i will always support 🫡 she is a genius after all.

[honeycreammilkshake]

I feel like an ass for saying this, but outside of Sukuna and Yuuji i dont really think the other characters are interesting. Yeah MAYBE Geto but thats also just the most indeoth character gege has wrote. Otherwise everyone single other character is just overtly simple or a jackass.

I mean shit, the world building is so lackluster. Theres a lot that looks like it was written on the fly and no real thought put into it sometimes. Hell theres timess where plot devices feel like they got put on a backburner and forgotten. Shit some deaths felt unessacary (gestures to the fhcking female cats)

And noboara? Dont get me started her staying dead would have been amazing to help yuuji grow!

Nope, shes back. Its the fucking fairy tail death situation all over again.

Also, in the new chapter im NOT happy with how gege handled Yuuta. So anticlimactic...

Im just.... im really upset over this because you can tell a lot of this was halfassed and forced.

Also fuck RCT. Brings back people feom the dead but you cant bring baxk anyone else? What the fuck is going on. Im not excited for the mangas ending at all...

i feel you, anon. sorry for the late reply btw.

don't feel bad about sharing your opinions. i agree with you on them. i feel like a LOT of the characters are either underdeveloped or simply not as interesting as they could have been. i feel bad because i think gege is experiencing a lot of pressure since this is their first official and long-running series and it became really popular. i think they might not have as much experience as some other mangaka or maybe just they rush or don't fully plan things out? i'm just speculating so i hope i don't seem cruel-hearted in saying as much.

and i agree a lot of the plot seems too sudden and not fully fleshed out. i often cannot even keep track of the technical stuff and details bc new stuff is always being added and i think i've even found some contradictions and unexplained stuff that doesn't really make sense.

overall, jjk isn't as well-written as it maybe could have been, and i'm saying this objectively. i think gege loses sight of the story a lot of the time and sometimes pulls plot developments that don't make much sense as a way to speed things up.

nobara coming back could have been handled much differently for example. as much as i do agree that her death could have served yuuji's arc well, i think she deserved better than being killed off so suddenly. she shouldn't have been killed off at all. or if she was brought back sooner it wouldn't feel so fairy tale unrealistic.

and i also find yuta a bad replacement for yuuji and just kind of boring honestly. he's like gojo 2.0 in terms of character-building only gege adores him this time.

i'm also not understand the full extent of rct. maybe i'm missing something?

idk anon. you're right on a lot of this. thankfully the manga will be ending soon, and there's a chance that someone other than gege will be continuing it, so maybe better developments and more closure will be giving to us?

idk, no disrespect to gege but im honestly not sure what kind of story im reading any more.

[sunriseverse]

WRITING PROCESS QUESTION because of that ask meme: your characterization is always so on point. i love them. do you have any advice on developing that? what's your process? how d you capture character voice?

and this is a long shot but: do you have any advice for people who don't speak the language specifically? is there a good way to approach character voice when theres a sort of barrier?

first of all: it makes me very very happy (and bashful) that you think my characterisation is so accurate! it's one of the things about my writing that i'm truly proud of :) hmmm, let's see. i think to start with, i have to say that, in my experience, "in character" writing isn't just about dialogue. if you're writing a pov character, staying in character means using descriptive phrases and inner monologue patterns that create the image of the character in the same way that camera shots, wardrobe, lighting, etc, would do this work for you in a show/film. if your pov character has certain defining life experiences, they're more likely to speak or think a certain way—are they more formal, or more casual? are they uni-educated, or do they work a blue-collar job after scraping by with a high school diploma? have they experienced trauma that's caused them to be bitter and cynical, or do they, in spite of trauma, cling to humanity and kindness?

another thing that i find helps a lot when characterising characters is figuring out two things: what they want, and what they fear. these can vary based on the period of canon—for example, dmbj characters are probably going to have more variations of wants/fears over time than characters from a single-series show like tdj. to use dmbj as an example: in sha hai, wu xie wants to bring down the wang, and give xiaoge a safe future. what he fears is this plan failing. he'll go to any lengths to make sure it happens the way it needs to—will use, and destroy, and manipulate, and lie as much as he needs to for this to work. obviously, though, that's just the barebones picture—in canon, we also see him being kind when he could be cruel, and merciful when he could be deadly. what does that say about him as a character? there's many interpretations, and all of them are more or less equally valid—but, in the end, more accurate than a characterisation which doesn't take any of these things into account.

i know meta is a bit of a dying art in recent years (well, it feels like i've been hearing and saying this sentiment for the entire eleven years i've been involved in online fandom, so maybe recent isn't the best term), but i truly believe that, through reading, or writing your own!, analysis of characters' actions and mindsets, based on canon's evidence, is a key factor in understanding and accurately portraying characters. and, don't get me wrong, you don't have to do this in a formal, or even public level! a lot of my breakthroughs with relation to characterisation have come at one in the morning in dms with my friends. and you don't always have to agree with other peoples' meta, either; disagreement is just as valid a way to react; what matters is that you then try and figure out why you disagree—is there canon you think contradicts it, is it based on canon that's been retconned or altered since its initial creation, or is it just a theory/read you personally feel squicked by, even if there's canon proof?

to connect this to your question about foreign language media: i'm probably not the best to ask this, since what i write for is largely (only?) for languages i'm a native speaker of, but i've been getting more into kdramas lately, and my korean is............very basic (i can say anyeonghasaeyo and gamsahamnida and that's about it), but i'm planning on writing fic for at least one kdrama some time in the future, so while you should take this with a grain of salt, my best advice is two-pronged: one, seek out materials written by fans who speak/have knowledge of the language of the media you're wanting to write for (this helps a lot for cultural context, and errors with english subbing; tdj seems to drop a good number of referentials in the english subs where i'm watching it, and english subs for cdramas are kind of hilariously bad about endearments/nicknames/titles, not to mention translating the name into english, rather than leaving it in pinyin), and two, pay attention to the spoken language. you might not be able to understand what's being said, but watching through a second time and only paying attention to the words rather than the subs can help immensely to get a feel for the tone and vibe of a character's speech patterns—are they prone to being loud? cheerful? do they crack jokes a lot? and so forth. if you combine these two with what i've mentioned above, about considering the character's background, and then the way they interact with other characters, and what they want and fear, while you'll probably not be perfect at characterising the characters in the same way a native speaker would be, you'll be flying a great deal above a majority of the fandom, and neatly elide the "they would NOT fucking say that" reaction in most cases.

(thank you for letting me ramble about this, i love talking about writing <3333 i hope some of this was helpful!!!)

[pinkrabit]

Episode 2 of ATLA LA

THERES MY BOY ZUKO’S EXPLOSIVE RAGE

"He's a coward!" That's part of his character arc, Zuko. Just like yours I'd growing hair.

"[Before] you kill someone?" And then Aangs sigh of grief feels so on brand.

Also, aang, baby, I know you want to avenge your family but you have to know you are allowed to be a child. Even in war.

"Idk about you, but I can't go back" paralleled with "No! I will never turn my back on people that need me!" (Painted Lady)

Gran Gran giving Katara the scroll instead is such a nice touch. Because Gran Gran was always proud of her "little waterbender."

I still hope Katara steals a scroll though. It feels important to her character. Where she feels she's right, beyond logic or practicality. But she morally feels in the right. Which we see her demonstrating a lot in the original series.

Aang's apology to gyatso 🥺

"I bet you taste like chicken." Sokka. I don't think there's chicken in the poles.

Zuko raging at his Uncle trolling him is perfect. And then him bringing in logic/his "General" ideology.

Zuko doesn't have tact Iroh.

IROH GETTING OFF TASK FOR FOOD IS SO ON BRAND

LADIES WITH MURDER FANS

Suki, my love

The wariness of the Kyoshi Island leader seems genuine to the original source

"I know I don't belong here. Thats something I've been feeling a lot lately."

"If I can learn to be the Avatar, maybe I can bring the place I knew, a world where people are happier, back."

I truly think Aangs actor has nailed his character. It feels so genuine and accurate.

Kyoshi didn't benefit from the kindness of strangers, she terrified them if I remmeber correctly.

SOKKA, STOP TRYING TO GET PUSSY.

Him stumbling because of a pretty girl omg.

Aang laughing at Sokka. Yes, he's a little more serious, but are we all watching the same show???? He still has a sense of humor, he's still a little shit <3

Sokka covering himself like a blushing maiden, omg

Aang is such an optimistic. "It's more than you knew before, though, right?"

Yes, Katara! Tell him he can't avoid the responsibility. "We're not going anywhere. "

AND THEN THE TARGET PRACTICE

My sweet children.

Sokka is unimpressed with bending. Since 2005.

Katara saying he'll save the world by making connections. Because it's true. We learn throughout the original series that there's good and bad everywhere. Primarily, because of Aang connecting with others.

Zuko’s crew dissapointing him 20 years ago, and now.

Suki's stealth feels like a nice touch. Pretty girl just shows up all the time.

WHERE ARE SOKKA'S CHARACTER FLAWS

At least he seems a little arrogant and tooting his own horn too much.

He might not be sexist, but his masculinity is still fragile in the first half. Feels important to acknowledge that.

Humble that man Suki. Thank you.

HE STORMS OFF! What a little bitch. Love him. He's so pathetic.

Aang terrified of hurting people, and seeming so hurt by people being afraid of him. The doubt!

"How many people will I hurt??"

My boy, this is war. You can do it. You have so much to learn.

Sokka. I expect an apology and DRAG.

Sokka loves getting beat up by women.

Ew. Wait. Why is fighting always so flirty.

Aangs inner turmoil. Aang asking for help.

Here comes the SPIRIT REALM. NO TOILETS, ONLY SPIRITS.

"There's a lot you don't know." No shit, Kyoshi.

Zuko having a reflection about his banishment paired with, "Sometimes hope can be a cruel thing."

Solka is so enamored about being tackled.

WHERE IS THE KYOSHI DRAG

Suki taking off her makeup and armor, potentially symbolizing her showing herself to sokka as a girl not a soldier. Showing her insecurities, allowing her vulnerability.

Aang, now is not the time to talk with your former life.

Kyoshi mentioning roles of the avatar without including, "human," "friend," feels so intentional. Because Aang just wants to be human. He just wants to be himself, but the Avatar cannot afford that.

The pai sho anecdote, omg

Strong leader leady!!! What a bad bitch.

ZUKO IF YOU HURT KATARA I SWEAR TO AGNI

Katara double checking on Aang before going to fight on Kyoshi in the LA vs thr North Pole.

"But, what if I hurt someone along the way??" Poor airbender just wants to live a peaceful life. My boy, it's not your fault. You were born too late. However, you are the only one to fix this.

"Being the Avatar means putting your duties above all else. Even your life!"

Kyoshi. He's 12. He just woke up. Aang needs an adult. Aang needs a protector. In the animation and LA. Katara. Your role in his life is this. Protect his gentle spirit.

SOKKA USING THE FAN

BUT WHERE IS THE DRAG

Katara. Honey. You can't fight a small army.

I love seeing her PTSD being accentuated in the LA is so amazing.

Avatar shape shifting carries from animation to LA I see. Does this count as drag? You think Aang identifies as genderfluid?

Aang is constantly fainting. He's always confused but rolling with it. He always feels guilty. He NEEDS love.

"..a reason to believe again.."

YES

Give aang recognition and respect despite his mistakes and flaws. He's a child and he's doing great, for all that he is.

"Thank you.. for bringing the world to me."

I can accept the lack of drag if I see Sokka fighting like a Kyoshi Warrior with a murder fan.

Kyoshi = Scary Lady

"Don't worry, kid. You don't have to do this alone."

Such a pissing match between Zuko and Zhao.

Sokka feels okay, a little bland. Zuko’s character needs to be more dramatic. Once again, Aang's character feels amazing.

Aang this episode has had to come to terms with the idea that his life is not his own. His right to live is a privilege. His existence is transactional. And he will never know the peace he craves for long intervals.

[shoheiakagi]

imagine how much more interesting and better k would be if it was a psychological thriller where high schooler is.ana yash.iro has multiple personality disorder, which unfortunately led him to killing the wrong person from the wrong gang

ashinaka high is actually a low budgeted high school located in the less glamorous parts of shizume, most of the student body coming from low income and dysfunctional families. the staff are underpaid and frankly dont care much for the students.

shiro’s only friends are neko and kuroh, and he’s in good terms with kukuri. neko is part of the special education class because she is mentally and emotionally immature compared to her peers, and would constantly speak and behave in a catlike manner. kuroh is the new student who finds himself struggling to fit in since he was raised in a very old fashion and traditional environment out of the city, which leads him to be taunted by the crueler students (luckily he’s good at defending himself). kukuri is one of the few students who actually wants to make something out of her life, striving hard to get good grades and land an opportunity to a prestigious college. she’s kind and wants to help her peers succeed too, no matter how much they curse at her

shiro lives in a foster home filled with troubled children with no where else to go. his multiple personality disorder is a result of a traumatic situation he faced as a kid in an orphanage. his second personality was developed as a form of defense, but ended up being a reflection of his abusers so he ends up doing a lot of things he regrets and doesnt even remember for the most part

homra is an actual street gang and a lot more cruel than they are in canon. they frequently engage in gang wars and kill off their rival gangs as an act of dominance and marking their territory, not caring if any innocent civilians get hurt. they still share a very tight knit bond, which is why theyre out for blood when a member of theirs is shot in cold blood.

while there are no labels or confirmation, the gang knows that tot/suka’s bond with their leader, mik/oto, is very different from the rest, with most of them assuming that theyre lovers. so while they go through the stages of grief and anger, theyre also terrified of mik/oto’s wrath when news of tot/suka’s death first came out. they know that once mik/oto snaps, theres a chance that some of them might end up losing their lives while carrying out their vengeance

kama/moto and the abc boys have more dialogue and importance to the plot, bc at the end of the day, they are also highly ranked members of the gang and tot/suka was a very important person to them as well

s4 abc guys are the police force led by chief commissioner seri. muna/kata is the head detective while fushi/mi is the crime data analyst

socioeconomics would play a huge role in the theme of the story, along with mental health and illness

no green clan (cause those guys suck, esp that old man), no gold clan, no weissman level or any shit like that

[leafcabbage]

In the HGAU during the lead up to the 75th Games do the rebels have their own version of coming out with shocking stuff during interviews ect to try and get the games to stop? Like with in the original series Peeta saying Katniss was pregnant

hiiii sorry this and a few others have been sitting in my inbox for two months because i couldnt come up with good answers lol. so much has been happening in my life that oh boy coming up with coherent thoughts... difficult

anyway, yes, 100% absolutely.

i think sneeg goes the route of being more pissed off about it, talking about how cruel it is to send victors back into the games and stuff. he knows he isnt getting anyone with emotional speeches, hes not the type, so he'll go for something more straightforward.

i dont think techno says anything. he just sits there while being asked questions. he and sneeg really share the sentiment of feeling ridiculous being dressed up like the capitol does with children and paraded around and such

(side note to that: one of the brief moments of levity in the whole thing is ranboo trying Really hard not to laugh at sneeg all dressed up for the opening ceremonies, because you Know they've got the outfits of all time. tommy and tubbo are the ones with the Cool Stylists. ranboo looked like a loofah their first games)

as for some of the others.... niki would go last (i know in traditional hunger games the male tribute goes last, but i changed the rules anyway so the tributes are not pulled by gender, so fuck it yknow), so she's really got a lot of pressure to get a good last word in. as amazing as it would be for her to yell at the capitol, shes incredibly smart and would definitely come up with Something to kinda... make the victors feel like theyre really in it together, if only for the moment. problem is, she is very smart. i currently have NO ideas. but just know she is so cool and amazing.

see if anyone has ideas im so open to this being collaborative, because theres so much that could happen... tubbo obviously has to have his mockingjay moment since he is The Guy... tbh tommy would totally try to claim that he and ranboo are having a baby if he thought it would be believable.... i have no idea what ranboo does. they're certain theyre going to die so they have nothing to lose... hmmm

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

"ive just seen a lot of ppl #call izaya a sociopath but like. as a Comical Exaggeration #or just as an insult to be disproven" re: ur tags

i don't really go here (drrr!!), but i came across ur blog through a series of events that led me to an ASPD Izaya analysis post that u are connected to. somehow. i dont fucking know man. but like anyways i 100% agree, like have u seen him. Look At Him. i only watched like the first season and havent touched anything else but i can say with 100% certainty That Guy Has ASPD. okay this ask isnt about me telling you i agree with you and others who have that correct opinion, but just wanted to say it.

anyways GODDDD, your tags... i feel that so hard. theres a character im a big ASPD truther for (and its like so obvious. lzaya level obvious), who ALSO gets called "sOcioPatH" and "psYchOPatH" as an insult or joke. and every time im like... "well... no, but actually yes"

no because i can tell you're calling him that to demonize him and seeing as that you are unironically using "sociopath", you obviously dont actually know much about ASPD. but yes because he has ASPD!

AH THE ANALYSIS POST! i can explain: i'm connected to it because the person who wrote it is my fiance, and i'm the mentioned Person With ASPD that he mentions he knows :P

also since im curious: what character?

and i on god HATE it when people use the term "sociopath" unironically its like. im using it because i have aspd, and oftentimes i use it as a derogatory term to draw attention to how derogatory it is. like. i know why i'm using it. why are You using it!

and oftentimes its because they deadass think "sociopathy" is still an actual Thing You Can Be Medically Recognized As and like. bestie. it IS clear u know literally nothing! its like theyre SO CLOSE to getting that the character has aspd but dont actually know HOW aspd works outside of a bullshit stereotype so its only said as a joke and not treated seriously foe actual analysis

im gonna make a comparison here BUT BEFORE ANYONE BUSTS MY BALLS: I AM AUTISTIC. I CAN MAKE THIS COMPARISON. AND EVEN IF I WASN'T, IT'S NOT A THOUGHTCRIME TO IDENTIFY OBVIOUS PATTERNS.

it's like i looked at a very obviously autistic character and kept calling them retarded as a joke. and even though i knew that derogatory term used to refer to an actual thing people have, i refuse to acknowledge the existence of ACTUAL autistic people's ACTUAL experience with autism and how it differs from the VERY derogatory and insulting stereotype of "a retard" and just. kept calling that character retarded because i thought that people with those traits deserved it or something

and then i tagged the post "#tw autism" as like an extra kick in the nuts

but GOD i feel that last paragraph SO hard. its clear ppl notice those traits in him but dont know enough (and dont care to go learn) about the actual disorder. so peoples' real suffering and social ostracization is just a punchline. because "mental health acceptance" ALWAYS has this fucking asterisk of "not you, though" when it comes to (among other things) aspd

its a cruel world out there for aspd blorbo truthers 😔 not only do we have to deal with bullshit ass takes, our backs constantly hurt from the weight of carrying the Correct Opinions 😔😔

[doomednarrative]

this might be a weird/dumb question but those are my specialty so *adjusts clip on tie* what’s your favorite re virus? in terms of what it’s done in universe, what it has the potential for, your favorite to write, etc. not a specific monster, the specific virus. hope that makes sense lol

Keep in mind I'm still playing thru all the games and reading up on virus lore when I say this, but I think it kinda has to go to either the Progenitor virus for the fact that its the literal building block of most of the viruses in universe, or to Las Plagas because of how Versatile it is.

Progenitor is cool from a lore aspect because of how the biology works and the fact that its like The reason a lot of the other virus strains even exist because its an ancient RNA thing that by the time they found it it just ended up killing humans, and so they had to learn how to adapt it in lab conditions. Its had far reaching effects over the Entire series so I think it's neat for that reason alone, a lot of stuff just wouldnt exist if that didn't come first.

Las Plagas meanwhile is definitely the one I have the most fun writing personally and not just because of my own au shit with Leon but like, the fact that theres so many Varients of it, from the Verdugo to the Regenerators and the Novistadors and all that. Its just neat from a design perspective (and sad because of how fuckin cruel they are) how many different versions of this One parasite exist and how it can affect different things.

I'm also really partial to the idea of stuff that can just like. Lay dormant in your system and basically make you a walking time bomb for the horror factor of it all so t-Phobos is pretty interesting for that reason too tbh.

I know thats like three different answers but I'm incapable of chosing just one tbh they all have a lot of possibilities and room to be creative with both in canon and fan works so I like a lot of them for vastly different reasons~

[my-monologues-to-my-brain]

Re reading aftg and im just. Broken. These god damn twins. Neil rightly points out they can barely stand the sight of each other on a good day, but they still fiercely care about each other and only upon re read did it fully hit me. And, boy, did it fucking hit me. These stubborn, traumatized, mean idiots. They would kill for each other and they do, but they dont understand each other one fucking bit and now i cant unsee how easily they couldve given up on each other but refused to.

Andrew cared for Aaron as much as he ever did even when Aaron hated him for keeping his promise: even when Aaron hated Andrew and assumed that he killed Tilda for his own reasons, despite the fact that Andrew had done so to keep the promise he made to Aaron, to protect him. We know how angry Andrew is about that. The first time Neil sees a glimpse of the intesity and fury that Andrew hides behind his indiference is when the twins briefly argue in the stadium and Andrew almost casually confesses to killing Tilda in front of all the foxes. Aaron denies Andrew having done that for him, and when Andrew says that just because Aaron decided to forget about that promise that didnt mean he wasnt going to keep it, and that fuck him for expecting anything else, theres real anger in his eyes. To him its obvious. Hes been clear about it. He keeps his promises, hes brutal not because of some sociopathic inability to care but because he cares fiercely. But Aaron doesnt understand that. Or him. And they dont talk about it. But as much as Andrew despises him for that, he never stops caring.

And Aaron. Boy. Reading the story knowing where we were heading allowed me to see a lot of things i hadnt fully taken in on first read, and Aarons arc is one of the many things that hit different. Hes so sure that his brother not only doesnt care, but is in fact incapable of caring. And it doesnt change a fucking thing. He hates Andrew, but he never gives up on caring for him as fiercely as Andrew cares for him, and it fucking breaks me. Hell of a thing, really. To never fully withdraw, to care that much, with that intesity, all while being so completely certain that it was a one way street. To Aaron, Andrew would never care. Not really. To Aaron, there was no changing Andrew or his sociopathic tendencies. And it didnt change a fucking thing. He made peace with that fact, in a way: knowing that Andrew would never feel their dinamic the way he did, it didnt change the fact that Aaron cared. Through hate and while never shortening the distance between them, he cared. He kills Drake in a way that rightfully mirrors Andrew killing Tilda. And he is one of only people in the entire series to actually look out for Andrew, concerned about Andrew being in danger and not just being a danger to others, which is why he sets to confront Neil to check what is going on between the two. The only other people who we see being aware that Andrew is in fact human enough to be hurt are Wymack, Bee and, of course, Neil. Everyone knows Andrew can physically hold his own in a fight, and most of them do not even consider how someone could hurt Andrew, even after Drakes abuse, and their obliviousness is not there out of malice but its there none the less. Aaron not only cares enough about Andrew to get himself up in his and Neils bussiness (though in a much smarter way than Nicky, who tried to be nossy and almost got stabbed for his troubles cause of course he did), but he also is concerned and suspicious when he learns about their relationship cause he actually thinks of protecting Andrew. Aaron confronts Neil in a purposely cruel way, and he has to know the likelihood of that ending with him being punched by Neil (as he in fact did) and possibly Andrew, hes not dumb, but he goes for it and very especifically evaluates Neils reaction. Aaron does like being a dick to Neil, but thats not something he would just do for the fun of it. He doesnt even need to figure out Neils stand on the relationship in terms of getting Andrew off of his and Katelyns backs: that hinges on Andrews view of the relationship, not Neils. They havent yet fixed their issues, the twins dinamic is still shaky at best, but Aaron not only cares about Andrew, he cares about Andrew in a way barely anyone thinks of caring for him.

They both had enough reasons to give up on each other. They wouldnt drop out of each others lives entirely, they couldnt, being in the same university, in the same team, with promises of sticking with each other until graduation, yet they still couldve given up on every other level. But they didnt.

Why stick with someone who cant be reached?

Why stick with someone who doesnt think theres enough of you to be reached?

I think of Neils words to Kevin. You just need to be more afraid of letting go than you are of holding on.

After all they went through, the twins still knew they didnt want to let go of each other.

Its easy to see strained relationships and just cut ties. Sometimes theres not enough to save. Sometimes distance is the only way to heal. I think of Nicky and his parents. I think of Kevin and Jean. But sometimes theres healing after rock bottom. Sometimes theres enough will on both parties to mend whats broken and build something better. Sometimes theres enough people around you willing to stand with you and remind you of that will. And so we heal.

Somehow, we heal.

[greyeyedmonster-18]

just finished the best worst thing and can i just say. you’re an excellent writer?

but, and i really hope this doesn’t come off the wrong way, i was really hoping for jily (but especially lily) to not get that happy ending, for sirius to forgive them so easily (even if it was in character) or harry to extend that olive branch. is that mean? like,,it just felt like a series of deliberately cruel decisions on their part without any *real* consequences ykno? and sirius (and remus) just kept getting so hurt god it really hurt lol (especially when he just fkn broke down after lily said harry wasn’t his kid the audacity)

remus going off on them was so cathartic and i never wanted it to end, but i was secretly also hoping for a harry x jily showdown. i remember being super passionate at 16, how protective i was (and still am tbh) of my parents, always rearing to go if i thought someone even eyed them wrong. it would’ve been so cool if harry had gotten even an inkling of how sirius was being treated and decided to take offence to that ykno?

although, on the other hand, i guess it’s also a mark of what a good writer you are and how realistically you wrote the whole thing because it felt more in character for the adults (but especially remus and sirius) to keep harry away from all the ugliness that he shouldn’t be exposed to, how they didn’t want to irreparably ruin his image of his parents (bc that would go against everything sirius believes in)

(still would’ve been super cathartic to have harry use the same kind of verbal cruelty tho ‘you’re not my parents, you just gave birth to me in the middle of a war and then went and got yourself blown up. you should be thanking remus and dad on folded knees for everything they did for me. when they didn’t even have to’)

oof that was a lot of rambling no one asked for lol. sorry 😓🙈

aaaanyway the story was so, so good (and i haven’t actively read wolfstar in ages because i just,,,don’t like remus honestly speaking but you actually made me root for him too and i’m just genuinely in awe at how this entire thing spawned from a random prompt just like that so yeah.) thank u for writing it!

okay, firstly--i am blushing so hard, this is all SO nice? any compliments on my writing just make me so 🥺 and i dont have words except for thank you.

Second, the rest of this is great and i will continue answering below the cut to avoid an extra long post because i can never shut up

1. absolutely not taken the wrong way

2. sirius, my beautiful baby is made of second chances especially for james. james could do something AWFUL and sirius would forgive him.

3. It wasnt expressly written, but between the lines (sirius not going to the potters, remus not going to the platform, lily not coming to #12, harry being more indifferent to lily just based on how remus/sirius interact with her vs. James). But also that harry never found out the details, and even though harry was protective (dropping Dad in front of them, "theyre not my parents", "we do X differently), he definitely took cues from sirius on how to handle the situation.

4. Sirius knew this. Remus knew this. Remus was furious 5ever and nothing was the same, Harry could see that and trustED remus could be mad for all of them. So harry didnt have to worry ❤

5. This fic had to end lol. And there was alot of mini convos i cut out as an author to keep story moving and harry DEF wasnt as kind all the time. He extended the olive branch because he has a heart big enough for the entire world. But like...hes keeping score too. And theres room to grow for both of them.

THANK YOU AGAIN FOR READING

[fatphobiabusters]

hello! i have a toddler, and her dads side of the family are all bigger, and so is she. shes 2 but can pass as 5, and Im not in contact with the dad so i cant ask him, but I was wondering if you had any resources for kids of any ages and how to support if/when she gets grief about her body from society? i already know that u shouldn't talk abt weight in front of kids, and i dont restrict things like chocolate. ive always been on the thin side but i did struggle with anorexia for a few years, which i was able to overcome when i had to eat while pregnant for her. i just want to make sure that she grows up knowing shes beautiful, u know? i constantly get comments already about how shes big for her age, i usually reply to those people something along the lines of yeah shes super strong too (she moved a chair while i was in it once!) but im wondering if theres something better i can say? even if shes 2, shes listening, and i dont want her internalizing that she like has to be strong for her body to be okay. theres just a lot of stuff that i dont know, that i want to know, to be there for her the best i can. thank u!

I'm so happy to hear you are thinking about this already! You are doing some good ground work, and I'm pleased to say there are already listicales about raising body positive kids. Does my soul good. Some places to start:

https://www.nwpc.com/teach-kids-body-positivity/

https://www.mother.ly/child/how-to-raise-kids-with-a-positive-body-image

https://more-love.org/2019/03/05/how-to-raise-a-body-positive-kid/

A podcast:

https://www.fullbloomproject.com/podcast

And to help teach media literacy:

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/news-and-media-literacy/how-do-i-start-teaching-media-literacy-to-my-preschooler

Also it's important to check in with your kid, throughout the years as they experience things related to body image, often we think as adults that something will be experienced a certain way by children when it can be the opposite. Kids are funny that way. I also want to point out (because I didn't see it but I could have missed it) that if you watch media with your child make a point of saying a fat character is cool or brave or what have you, older media won't be good for this (I cringed thinking about The Goonies) but for instance in the Pokémon xy season, Teirno is a fat boy that loves to dance and you could say "I wish I had moves like him".

Mario is fat and is the hero of his game series, comes to mind as well. Even if she doesn't realize it you'll be teaching her to respect bigger bodies that aren't hers. Because everyone is unique and I'm sure as adults we know some weird cognitive disconnects start young.

Kids might also be accidentally rude or cruel as well, so back to that check in with your daughter thing. I was in college when a 7 or so year old asked me why I was so big/fat. I said "this is the way I am, people are all different, isn't that cool". If I was 7 and another kid said that to me it'd have been a toss up between "that's a weird question" and total mental keysmash. Kids are all so unique.

It is mentioned in the links but to your concern about praising strength, a great way to get around that concern is to mix it up. Non physical traits, especially, are great to praise, children have more control over their actions vs their rapidly changing bodies. For instance you can emphasize kindness and helpfulness. It's really dependent on the situation, but a rotation of complements can foster a more rounded sense of self. It sounds like she's your only child but it's good to encourage kids in a gender neutral way. Our culture praises boys differently from girls. So don't be afraid to praise bravery, cleverness, adventurous thinking ectra along side emotional responsiveness, generosity, helpfulness ectra.

Something I didn't see mentioned but want to bring up from personal experience is, your daughter might struggle with wanting to mature and wanting to be a kid at the same time. To some degree all kids do but often bigger kids are shopping in the adult clothing section earlier than their peers, I remember being embarrassed about it, so down the road if you notice her needing the adult clothes, maybe have a talk about how she's still a kid and she can still be a kid, clothes are just clothes, and now a days with torrid you can find stuff with pop culture characters on it. (Back in my day it was very much a shift from cute fun patterns and colors to muted or jewel tones). The adult nostalgia boom is probably going to be great for kids like me who had to age up in clothing earlier. Off this, one more personal story but my mom was shorter and an apple shape, I was a pear and taller than her since I was maybe 14-16, she didn't know how to help me dress. So down the line don't be afraid of googling up how to best dress your daughters shape. I spent most of high school in jeans too tight on my thighs with shirts a size too big. Big oof.

I don't know how to finish this off just, thank you so much for caring and I hope both of you have many years of self love ahead.

[rjshepherd]

if Heisenberg survived and brought to Blue Umbrella headcanons??

See I was going to write something nice about how blue umbrella helped him and then he had a difficult but still very pleasant life.

But fuck that here's some horror and angst.

warning: very dark content under the cut.

Blue umbrella Karl headcanons

-i think its actually the BSAA who find him shortly after the bomb destroys the megamycte. He's in quite a state, probably missing body parts like an arm or an eye. Hes seriously injured and in need of a hospital, but where can they take him? he might infect a regular hospital. Most of the BSAA staff dont see him as a person, just a BOW so they send him to a blue umbrella lab for treatment.

-Karl is the only survivor of the village and only sample of the unedited mold left in the entire world. he would be IMMENSELY valuable on the black market. Blue umbrella don't do BOW arms dealing like the original umbrella, but they're still glad to be the only ones with a sample. they're going to use him to make themselves a fortune in new medicine or made to order soldiers.

- Chris was correct not to trust Blue umbrella. Ok their goals are far more noble than the original company. they want to use their predecessors experiments, viruses and knowledge to make things better for people. but ultimately they still do experiments that could be considered cruel. they don't test on people anymore but they have no problem testing on BOW's like karl or the other lords. after all, they're not really human anymore so who's going to complain?

-they want the mold from karl, that much is obvious. but i think they'd be interested in having him as an operative, like the BSAA bioweapon soldiers we see at the very end of re8. Maybe they send him into the field but i actually think they might make copies of him, like the tyrant series. Karl is incredibly valuable so i doubt they'd wanna risk losing him, but copies? something they can mass produce? They'd sooner use those than risk real soldiers lives.

- i don't Karl has any say in this. I envision them using something like that P45 device wesker used on jill to control people like karl. He's still aware of whats happening but theres nothing he can do about it .

- He himself doesn't feel indebted to BU in any way, he didn't ask for their help. but they make a point of telling him how they saved him and how he owes them for that. He probably starts off in some sort of quarantine zone while they fix him up but after that i can see them hiding him further and further away in the labs until he's essentially locked in a cage.

-every time he acts up, the leash tightens. Maybe he starts off in a relatively nice room, no freedom but at least comfortable. However, one day he snaps, demanding to be let out or "how much longer are you going to keep me here?" maybe he kills a researcher in self defence. either way, Blue umbrella reveals their true colours, that they never intended to let him go. By the time things calm down again Karl is locked in a tiny room somewhere deep underground with few amenities and even less to entertain himself . they use any excuse to make things miserable for him, like not coming when they call or flinching when they take blood.

-I imagine they like to lock him in a faraday cage to block his electrical abilities from influencing the metal around him. it makes him feel powerless and the lack of connection to his magnetic abilities really disoriented him

- understandably Karl is not too happy about all of this. He's already traumatised by what miranda did to him but to have it done all over again by the people who were meant to be helping him is a step too far. I can absolutely see him going feral and trying to escape, probably killing a lot of researchers in the process.

-So what sort of experiments are they doing on him? i can see them cutting piece off of him to test the molds regen powers, maybe trying to shoot him to see if he can deflect the metal in bullets, maybe replacing parts of him with plastic he cant actually manipulate or metal parts that hurt if he does try to use his powers?

- if you wanna get really fucked up i can absolutely see blue umbrella vivisecting him. The want the cadou to create more soldiers like him and they want to examine his electric organs , which they cant do if he's dead ( no brain activity would mean no electricity). unfortunately because karl is so difficult to kill, he's awake and aware the entire time.

- maybe chris has some suspicious of what BU are doing and decides to check in. He doesn't like Karl or care for him in any way, but he doesn't want another outbreak on his hands or more people like the lords out in the world. I imagine by the time he found Karl, the poor bastard would be too far gone. Either mutilated beyond recognition, Mind warped by the P45 device or driven insane by the torture. I think the kindest thing Chris could do would be to put him out of his misery.

Thanks nonnie. im sad now ;-; i am a terrible person and you are an enabler

[captainkirkk]

idk about you but outsider pov is one of my favorite tropes and theres not NEARLY enough of it in tua fics imo. like, theyre famous!! they can be recognized on the street by die-hard fans. isnt that the perfect setup?? (im imagining a world where the timeline didnt get flushed down the toilet)

I think about this all the time!!! Outsider POV is one of my favourite tropes, and I love applying it to literally everything, but it fits so well here because of how buck wild the Umbrella Academy is and the fact that they have a complicated relationship with fame

A lot of them aren’t easily recognisable considering they were child stars that escaped fame asap, but Allison is a hollywood star. She must get recognised all the time. I think the only reason why we don’t see it more in canon or even fics is because it interrupts the plot. And if Allison is famous and everyone knows that she’s from the Umbrella Academy, then her siblings might get recognised by proxy

And don’t even get me started on Five. I know he kind of got forgotten because he disappeared so young, but I know the Umbrella Academy must have had some hardcore fans (look at Leonard Peabody after all). A child superhero disappears? And no one ever brings it up again?? There must have been theories. And now he’s back and he looks exactly the same and is wearing the uniform and I’m pretty sure he even teleports in public a few times.

Look all I’m saying is that it’s a good thing that technology isn’t a big thing in TUA because if the internet was a thing, the Umbrella Academy would be all over the conspiracy sites and fandom pages too (though I still lowkey believe that the “lack of technology” is a cop out but whatever)

Also sometimes society has a tendency to overlook how fucked up famous events/people/shows are because of the media or because everyone gets swept up in the drama or whatever. I fully believe the Umbrella Academy is one of those things. People loved them in the 2000s. But give it a decade? Let the Hargreeves grow up. Let the young fans that idealised them grow up, let them become adults and look back at the child heroes they loved, and let them realise how fucking young the Umbrella Academy was. How fucked everything was. Let people rediscover Vanya’s book. I definitely believe it was “before it’s time.” As cruel as it is to say, I think people were over the Umbrella Academy when she published it. They had moved onto other things.

But given time, I think the Umbrella Academy would inevitably circle back into the public’s eye and probably not by choice. Think about the way we view Britney Spear’s “meltdown” now, compared to 15 years ago. Think about all the allegations of abuse that took decades to become properly public despite the fact that victims were speaking up for years. Think about all the old mysteries and cold cases that gain popularity decades after the fact because a true crime podcast/Netflix documentary/youtube series covered it. Netflix would eat up the idea of an Umbrella Academy documentary in 2020. It’s nostalgia. It’s gruesome and kind of fucked up. It’s mysterious. It’s the recipe for a hit.

This is just a really long way of saying that I wish there were more social media AUs and/or outsider POV fics for this fandom