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#like you get what i mean right??? its about the focus???
strwberri-milk · 2 days
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Can i request lnd boys talking it through with us during readers first time 🥰 soft praises and reassurance 🥰🥰
im gonna do a thing where its just. what he's gonna say to you bc the act itself is p standard - def missionary and him being so so so gentle with his movements to prevent hurting you + lets him watch every expression you make - this is also just making me realise how like. my dialogue for smut really doesnt change too much omg they sound so similar erfeafoaf
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His focus is primarily on your your face the whole time, looking at you intensely with every movement of his hips. He doesn't want to hurt you so he's going to take it slow, holding your hands as he gently whispers praise at you.
"You're doing perfectly for me. Yes, just like that."
"You feel perfect wrapped around me like that. I don't think I'll be able to last long. Hmm? No, that's a good thing. It means you're doing good."
"Please - just a little longer. I'm almost there."
"Don't hide your noises. I need to know if you feel as good as I do."
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Xavier is very hands on. He's holding you tightly, keeping you in place as much as he can despite your squirming. His pace is unintentionally teasing, long slow grinds as he really savours every movement of his body against yours.
"No, I promise I won't hurt you. I'll take good care of you, I promise."
"You're so warm - I don't know how long I can hold back."
"Look at me. I want to see what faces you make."
"Just a little bit more. I know you can do it."
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Rafayel is so sensitive to your touch - more than you ever thought he could be. He's always been receptive but the way he's acting right now, face buried in your neck as he slowly fucks you really takes the cake. You can't escape his presence at all - he's holding you tightly as he absolutely devours you.
"Don't look away from me - I've been dreaming of this moment for far too long."
"You - don't do that - I want to take my time with you."
"I need you so bad. Please don't hold back."
"Yes - yes, just like that. Keep going - you feel so good."
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Sylus seems like he'd be rough with you but when you finally end up in his bed he's holding onto you tightly, keeping you pressed against his chest as he showers you in kisses. He loves everything about you and he really wants to make sure you know that.
"Yes kitten, just like that. I knew you could do it."
"Don't worry if you get tired. I told you I'll take care of you."
"Just lay back for me. You don't have to do anything - I'll make sure you feel good, I promise."
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hazeltongzhi · 15 hours
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https://www.persuasion.community/p/why-you-should-feel-good-about-liberalism
incredible article assigned to my class by a professor who regularly says "we're gonna go to war with china in the next twenty years"
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Oh WOW. I know the author is being intentionally ideological but this is an insane amount of jerking oneself off and taking credit for other people's work. The overarching sentiment is that, because the western world operated under liberal democracy, then everything that happened during this period is liberal democracy's win. Love the focus on moralism and abstractions too. It's not just "liberalism is MORALLY good :)" but also undefinable shit like spooky "authoritarianism" and "totalitarianism". Backed up by even more people who jerk themselves off to liberalism like francis fucking fukuyama.
but it gets better, folks.
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holy shit, what to even say here. Liberals fundamentally have different definitions of words, especially imperialism here. Incredible that russia is the sole imperialist and the one bringing it back, but not the united states who has been operating under imperialist monopoly capitalism for over a century.
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If you add -ism to something then it becomes an ideology! Behold! The apex of the liberal framework of analysis! Really the pot calling the kettle black here. Is it not true that under liberalism, certain people do not get access to rights and liberties that otherwise should be universal? Migrants, refugees, undocumented workers, etc. etc. pay into systems of liberal democracy yet rarely if ever get anything in return. That's not to mention that liberalism very easily cheered on the genocide of indigenous peoples and slavery and only found it objectionable when it became no longer convenient for the bourgeoisie. Not to mention, the founding thinkers of liberalism (who the author praises!) themselves thought slaves, Indians, indigenous peoples were literally not wholly people.
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incredible cope right here. Let's see how the author tried to cope even further.
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Makes sense from an author that uncritically cites the economist, a paper made for british millionaires! They act as if China is just the president when there's dozens of governing bodies, built from a bottom up model. They act like demographics in the west aren't crashing as well. They act as though the usa's and the west in generals overt and covert military threats via. NATO, alliances, and straight up armed intervention isn't militarism. They act as though Marxism is an ideology of subjugation, which, if you were to argue that, it would apply more to liberalism by thousands of times more. And unattractive to immigrants? Laughable.
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This is tantamount to admitting defeat. "No, my ideology isn't meant to help you provide for your material needs silly goose (its to provide for the material needs of the bourgeoisie). You're just not making enough of your own meaning! back to brunch i go!"
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Are you gonna claim the GDR, USSR, and all the other socialist states who, at the very least, provided for these people and often gave more freedoms than the liberal democracies of their time as liberalism wins as well? Who were the first people to make abortions legal? Was it the usa with roe v wade in 19-fucking-73, when the practice had been ongoing, free, and legal in the PRC for literal decades? Was liberal democracy giving refuge to Jews when the usa and canada turned away refugee ships full of Jews during WW2, condemning them to the holocaust? Liberal democracies lag behind the left because liberalism is fundamentally right wing.
This article spends paragraphs to say next to nothing, citing the usual bourgeois rags and priests of capitalism, all to jerk oneself off to liberalism. Incredible.
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qveerthe0ry · 3 days
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What Means to You, What Means to Me
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Summary: Max Phillips changes everything. Written for @perotovar 's offering of Frith Word Count: 8,046 Pairing: Max Phillips Loki (The Trickster God of mischief and chaos) x afab! NB! Bisexual! Reader Rating: 18+ mdni Warnings: smut, talks about gender non-conformity, talks about gender dysphoria as it relates to sex, GENERAL GENDER FUCKERY Beta: My sweet angel @for-a-longlongtime of course A/N: Under the cut
Author's Note: First of all, I just want to thank Erin for putting together this writing challenge and sharing SO much about Norse Paganism. The effort you put into this, from the moodboards to educational resources is incredible. And the fact that you've shared something so close to you with all of us made this writing challenge feel like getting a warm hug <3
Second, see the author's note I wrote at the end (as to not spoil the story) if you want to know the ways Loki ingrained himself in this fic.
_
You’ve heard of this queer club before, but you’ve never been inside. You’d thought the descriptors were exaggerations, but you find out quickly that you were wrong. 
Security is tight at the door, and they ask you questions as they scan your ID that sound like small talk but are a bit more probing once you think about it. Your pockets are patted down and you walk through a metal detector before you even breach the front door. 
You’re wondering if it’s even worth all this. You’re by yourself, no one’s meeting you here, and you don’t plan on going home with anyone. 
Really, you’re just bored, in a fairly new city with no one familiar but your new co-workers to converse with; those are the last people you want to be around on a Friday night after a long work week. 
So you’re here. Are there a dozen other queer bars you could have gone to on this rainbow-lined street? Yes. But none of them really feel right. So you’re here, finally in clothes that you feel comfortable in, around people who aren’t going to make you feel uncomfortable in them. 
And its reputation precedes itself. 
Gaudy. Over-the-top. 
There’s three floors, the top two cut out to overlook the dance floor in the middle of the ground level. There’s chandeliers everywhere, far too ornate for a fucking nightclub. Candelabras litter every tabletop with flaming wax that you’re sure is a fire hazard in an establishment like this. There’s fuzzy, cozy-looking lounges and really hot people walking around serving complimentary waters on gold trays and maybe it was a mistake, coming here. 
But you’ve already been through the TSA of nightclubs, and so you might as well grab a drink while you’re here and make the uber ride home worth it. 
At least the drinks seem to be cheap. You take too long staring at the specialty cocktail names when a bartender asks how you’re doing, and end up ordering your favorite drink anyways. At least they seem nice, unlike some of the bars you’ve been to at the not-mandatory-but-suggestively-obligatory happy hours after work. 
You sit at the bar, a little intimidated by the fancy decor and skilled dancers that overwhelm the club. 
The music is unsuspecting, something soft and melodic that you only realize is live music when your eyes settle on her. 
Her fiery red hair cascades down her shoulders, igniting all the skin exposed by her backless dress. She’s sitting at the piano in the middle of the dancefloor, obscured by couples and others dancing around her. 
She’s everything. The most gorgeous woman you’ve ever laid your eyes on. Her nose is strong and her jawline juts and contrasts with those soft brown eyes. You’re yearning before you can even realize it, a kind of consumption that leaves you breathing heavier than normal as you sip your drink probably way too quickly. 
You focus on her long, nimble fingers, painted red at the nails and fluttering so skillfully over the ivory keys that it makes your cheeks feel hot. 
The ringing of the keys doesn't register over the thumping of your heart and the blood rushing in your ears, which feel like molten lava. Perhaps that’s why you don’t notice she’d finished her set until she’s a foot away from you, placing an order you’d only know if you were able to read lips.
Christ, her lips. Plump and painted in the same shade of red as her hair and nails, they purse as she sips from a champagne flute. She’s so dainty, and poised, everything you’ve never had the desire to be. 
And she’s staring right at you. 
“See something you like?” 
Your breath gets stuck in your lungs and your heart flutters in a medically dangerous way. 
“You’re incredible.”
The words roll off your tongue without any go-ahead from your brain. 
She laughs anyway, with her head thrown back, and the sight of her throat elongated makes your own go bone-dry. 
“If I had a nickel,” she jokes with a wink. 
Your half-melted brain scrabbles for something to say so you can be graced with her presence for even one more second. 
“How long have you been playing?” 
She quirks her perfectly shaped eyebrow at you, and she smirks, and something about the way she can see through you like cellophane turns you on and it makes you feel wicked. 
“You don’t really care, do you?” 
From your peripheral, you see her long, toned arm inching closer to yours on the bar. Her fingers touch yours, feather-light, and you shiver before you freeze in place. 
“I— No, I do.”
You can barely hear her low chuckle over the house music that’s started to play in her absence, but you do, and it sounds like heaven and hell all at once. 
Slowly, torturously, she leans closer to you, and her bubbly breath ghosts across your cheek, your jaw, and then gusts in your ear. 
“Don’t lie to me, handsome.” 
Her tone is teasing, sing-songy in a way that might be annoying if you weren’t so aroused. 
Your fingers clench around the glass you’re holding, and her own do the same over yours. 
“What do you want me to say?” 
You don’t know if you’re more scared, horny, or irritated. They’re all three tied for gold, at this point, with tipsy coming in second and way too warm bringing up the rear. 
And the pure audacity this woman has is impressive, as she places her lips so so lightly under your earlobe. You hope to god her lipstick stains. 
“Ask me if I wanna get out of here.”
Your lungs inflate too quickly, and your eyes close, and you lean into the touch of her lips. 
“Where would we go?” 
It’s a stupid question. Why in your right mind do you give a flying fuck? She could drag you to the DMV and you’d happily follow like a pup. 
She stands from the barstool, tall, taller than you realized, and the proximity puts her between your spread legs. 
Your thighs flex involuntarily, and your fingers twitch and ache to touch her. 
“I know a place. If you want?” 
Her eyebrow is quirked at you again as she leans back. You can’t find your words, so you stand in answer, and now you’re too close. Every delicious curve of her body is pressed against your front and you unhand your drink to dig your nails into the top of the bar. 
“Please.” 
Her grin is so mischievous that it startles you, those sharp canines on full display. You think about how they’ll feel against your skin as she nods her head and prompts you to follow her. 
You might as well be wearing a leash, the way you trail her so closely. You twist your fingers as the nerves start to pick back up, and all of a sudden you’re in front of some elevator doors with a very huge and intimidating bouncer guarding the buttons and staring you down. 
“Before we head up, just so you know, I’m working with a… different set of equipment than you might expect.”
You nearly ask her to repeat herself, a bit too overwhelmed with the eyes on you and the situation you’re about to get yourself into. But your brain plays a game of catch-up, and somehow this little fact makes you feel more comfortable. 
“That’s cool— me too. I mean, maybe? I don’t know what— uh, what you’d expect me to have, but… yeah.”
Your voice trails off as the big burly bouncer chuckles at you, and your face could probably melt off of your skull with how hot it feels, but then she grabs your hand and squeezes to tug you into the elevator with her. 
The club sounds are nearly all drowned out now, and you’re certain she can hear your heartbeat in the silence as she crowds you against the back wall. 
“My name’s Max,” she says, speaking all breathy and low against the skin of your neck. 
You shiver, barely eke out your own name as her body presses against yours. 
It’s heavenly, the way she feels against you, but the way she teases your earlobe between her dark cherry lips feels hellish. You still haven’t touched her, even though your hands are burning to feel the silk of her dress over her waist. You’re intimidated and horny and mentally working yourself up to do anything on your own without her giving you direct orders.
There’s a ding, and all momentum is lost when she turns away from you to enter the snow globe of a penthouse beyond the open elevator doors. You follow eagerly.
“This is your place?” 
Your voice is awe-filled as you look around. The walls are just windows, and the city lights and the last few minutes of sunset brighten all the dark wood and leather around you. 
“Yeah, so’s the club.”
Her tone is nonchalant, and you gape at her as she steps out of her strappy, expensive-looking high heels. Maybe you shouldn’t be so surprised. She has all the confidence of someone who owns the world, and her cockiness is reflected in the ostentatious nature of the club and her penthouse. 
But you’re still shocked. Maybe you’re shocked because she’s chosen you, out of every other patron, to come up here with her. 
“It’s nice— the club. And here, too.” 
She chuckles and shrugs but she thanks you as her bare feet bring her close to you once more. You feel your hackles raise as she approaches, along with your heart rate, but she walks right past you. 
“Follow me.”
As if you’d dream of doing anything else. 
Her bedroom is all windows, too. The bed is huge, much bigger than a normal king, and the space itself is fairly empty of any personal touches. It suits her mystique. You feel like you have a million unanswered questions, but none of them matter when she shoves you down onto the mattress and straddles your thighs. 
Your mouth drops open, but she steals the words from your breath when she grabs your hands and places them on her hips.
Finally. 
Fuck, she feels incredible under this silky dress as you squeeze her waist and arch your hips up into her. 
You tell her as much, and get another one of those cocky chuckles that goes straight to your center. 
“Do your worst, handsome.” 
And maybe you’ve never been the best at getting into someone’s bed, but you’re certain you’re the best once you’re between the sheets. 
It’s no exception, with her. You’re so eager to please. You worship every last inch of her body once it’s revealed to you. You take note of all the places you kiss and lick that make her breath hitch, you tease her until her cock weeps, and you take her so far down your throat that tears sting your eyes. 
Her nails dig into your scalp, and you feel like the cocky one when she begs you to pull off, when she tells you that you’ve damn near sucked her soul out through her dick. 
Your clit is throbbing and you’ve soaked through your underwear by the time she hastily pulls them off of you. She kisses you breathless and bites your lip with her sharp teeth as you roll the condom down her length. The way she whimpers when you finally straddle her sends you reeling. Your hand finds her tit, and your palm rolls against her taut nipple as you finally get her cock to slide through your slick folds. She arches into your touch and she begs and there’s no force powerful enough to keep you from giving in to her pleas.
Her face twists up so fucking beautifully as you impale yourself on her. Inch by inch, so slowly, teasing her like she’d teased you earlier in the night. You feel satisfied and hungry at the same time when you’re flush with her thighs. Her hips buck when you pinch her nipple, and she hits the perfect spot, and neither of you have any resolve leftover. 
It’s a give and take that lasts too long and is over far too quick. You ride her, and she thrusts up into you, back and forth until you both crumble at the same time, blinding and intense and loud. 
You might black out. 
One moment you’re stroking her skin with your fingertips and thanking her over and over, and the next you’re sitting up against her headboard with a glass of water in one hand and her fiery hair in the other. 
She’s sighing in your lap, nuzzling into the heat of your thighs with her aquiline nose. 
“You’re incredible,” you say for probably the millionth time that night. 
She chuckles again, just like she did when you first told her, but her pretty brown eyes shine when she looks up at you. 
“You’re not so bad yourself, handsome.”
Your face gets all hot again, and you feel shy, eyes darting around the room to focus on anything but the gorgeous woman resting on you. 
“Does it bother you when I call you that?” 
You huff. 
“Not at all.”
“Are you trans?” 
You huff again. 
“No. I— I don’t know. I’m just… me. In-between. I don’t really feel like I fit any one description.”
She hums and presses a kiss to your mound through your underwear.
“I understand.” 
“I’ve always been like this, you know? Before I knew what it was. I just didn’t feel comfortable in my own skin. Not in an insecure way. Just that it didn’t feel right.” 
“Do you want a dick?”
Her bluntness makes you laugh. 
“Sometimes I do.”
She nods, and the way her silky hair feels against your bare thighs makes you shiver. 
“It’s actually kind of awesome, I’m not gonna lie.”
She laughs with you. 
“Don’t rub it in.”
“I’ll rub it in if you give me another five minutes.”
She does.
You fall asleep in her arms, exhausted and sated and happy.
She’s gone in the morning. All the shades are drawn, those same hazardous candles from the club lighting the apartment dimly. Your clothes are dry cleaned and hanging in a bag you’re certain costs more than your entire outfit. There’s a note next to your half-empty glass of water on the nightstand.
See you around. 
Except you don’t. 
You wait eight whole days to go back to the club. You wear something nicer, go through the tight security, and saunter up to the bar with much more confidence than your first visit. You wait for her. You drink one too many and hope to find her walking around or playing the piano. 
A few people come up to you and ask you to dance, and you refuse each one with the bitter taste of irony on your tongue, and then you go home alone after last call with a headache and queasy stomach. 
Maybe she’s just out of town, you tell yourself. She owns an entire nightclub, she’s clearly a very important woman, probably quite busy, too. 
You go back the next weekend, and the next, and you don’t see her once. 
So after a month, you go again and this time you accept the offers to share a dance, grind against people with a weird confidence you know comes from the woman you hope to see tonight. You share meaningless kisses and buy a few people drinks but refuse an offer or two to ‘get out of here.’
You start to lose hope when the dim lights flicker brighter and last call is announced. But as you bid goodbyes to a group you were hanging with, that very large and scary bodyguard from the elevators is walking towards you, and this time his presence is more exciting and less intimidating. 
“Max would like you to come upstairs.”
And while it’s kind of annoying, and seems pretentious— why didn’t she come down here and tell you herself?— you follow. Eagerly. Once again. 
He lets you take the elevator up by yourself, and this time the anxiety is more anticipation than it is fear. 
Though, when the doors open, you’re face to face with a guy.
He’s got a familiar cocky smirk on his face, messy gelled hair, and he’s leaning up against a wall with his arms crossed. 
Panic, is what your body tells you to do, leave, run. But you’re frozen under his thick gaze. 
The elevator doors start to shut, and you take a step back when he moves to hold them open, but he chuckles. 
A cocky little chuckle. 
“Who are you?” 
“I’m Max.”
“No you’re not.”
“C’mon, handsome. It’s me.”
You shiver when he calls you that, but not in the same way you did when she said it. 
“Is this some kind of joke? Listen, she didn’t tell me she was exclusive with anyone—”
He cuts you off by saying your name in a pleading tone. 
“Come in, please, just give me a minute to prove it to you.”
Panic. Run. Leave.
You ignore every instinct to finally step out of the elevator. 
“You told me, last time, that sometimes you wished you had a dick. Right?”
You nod before you can think better of it. 
Who is this guy?
You’re no stranger to genderfluidity, the way a haircut or makeup or different clothes can drastically change someone’s look— but this isn’t that. This can’t be that. While they have similar features, her sharp noise was still softer, her eyes were less crinkled at the edges, her brow bone was much less prominent. If this is smoke and mirrors, she’s one hell of a magician. 
“Do you wish you had one right now?”
“I mean, yeah, I guess. Are you guys twins or something? What’s going on?” 
He chuckles again, and you have to say, it’s much less arousing coming from him than it was from your Max. He reaches out to touch your arm, and you want to shove him away, but you can’t.
Your body feels frozen, again, but not from fear. There’s a strange sensation that courses through you, some unexplainable energy that makes your bones feel like they’re vibrating, makes your blood feel thick and heavy in your veins. 
It scares you, but the newly soft look on this Max’s face is just comforting enough to keep you from a full-fledged panic attack. 
That, and the fact that it’s over just as quick as it started. Your body loosens back up as Max’s hand on your arm rubs reassuring circles. 
But then you feel weird. A strange turning low in your gut, kind of like arousal, but not quite. And your pants feel tighter, more constricting than they did earlier. 
You look down. 
There’s a bulge in your pants, like there would be if you were packing. But you’re not. You’re certain you made the decision to leave it at home when you left earlier in the night. 
You look back up at him. He’s smirking. 
“You can touch it.”
You do, despite your brain screaming how weird it would be to touch your crotch in front of a man you’ve never met before. 
You have a dick. 
You feel it now, and while the feeling of it in your hand isn’t foreign to you, the fact that it’s sensitive and fucking actually attached to your body is. 
You pull your hand away like it’s been scalded. 
“What the fuck?! How did you—“
You stare at him open-mouthed and terrified and maybe a little bit turned on.
“Does it matter? I gave you what you’ve always wanted.” 
He looks from your face to your… dick, and back again, smirking, admiring, like he’s just finished an art project.
“Will it… Will it go back?”
“Do you want it to?”
“I— I don’t know.”
Max chuckles that damn chuckle, all full of himself. But this time, it’s her. You know it is, now. As crazy as it sounds, it’s the only thing that makes sense. This is your Max. 
“Why don’t you take it for a test drive? If you don’t like it, I’ll change you back.”
You gape at him. It’s all clicking. This is your Max, and they’ve listened to you and done something so fucking weird but so fucking sweet. You don’t know how, and you honestly are starting to care less and less the longer Max keeps staring at you like he’s proud. Of you or himself, you’re not so sure, but it’s working. 
“It’s— it’s you, isn’t it?” 
“I told you so.”
“Fuck,” you sigh, “where have you been? I came back. Every weekend.” 
Max hums. 
“I was a little caught up. Got into a bit of trouble, as I do. But I’m back, and I wanted to see you. I’m glad you came.”
“Are you— I mean… you look a lot different?” 
He shrugs. 
“Do you still think I’m hot? I can change back—”
“No! No, sorry, I don’t mean to be rude. I was just confused. You’re still—”
“Incredible?” 
You huff a laugh, and finally relax for the first time since you got into that elevator. 
“Yeah. Incredible.”
His cocky demeanor falls to the wayside to make room for something more sincere. He takes a few steps until you’re face to face with him, and places a suspiciously cold hand on the back of your heated neck. 
“I missed you,” he mumbles. 
“I— I missed you too. That night… I’ve thought about it so much.”
“Mmm, yeah? Me too.”
You kiss the stupid smirk off of his face. 
He tastes the same as you remember before, like champagne and sweet mint and her. His teeth are just as sharp, scraping your tongue as it explores every bit of his mouth. 
His free hand grabs your hip and pulls you even closer to him and fuck, that feels better than it has any right to. Your cock stirs in your pants and you buck your hips again, fiending for this new type of friction. 
“Come to bed with me?” 
All you can do is nod and follow. 
The bedroom looks just the same as it did last time, but the lack of sunlight makes everything feel quieter tonight— slower, more serene. 
He turns down the covers slowly, and you stand at the foot of the bed, extremely uncertain about what happens next, even though your dick throbs with anticipation. 
“You still into this?” 
Max’s voice startles you out of your own head. 
“Yeah, sorry. Nerves.”
He hums and steps closer to you. 
“Nothing to be nervous about, handsome.”
You nod and let your eyes trace up and down his body, noting his broad shoulders in that crisp white dress shirt and his thick thighs under the satiny sheen of his slacks. He’s still just as gorgeous in this masculine form, and it’s as irritating as it is enticing.
“Do you wanna fuck me?” 
“Shit.” 
His words go straight to your cock, and you’re unashamed to palm it in your hand and press and curse at the completely new sensation. 
“I’m assuming that’s a yes,” he chuckles. “Do you want my ass or my pussy?” 
Your hand on yourself stills. 
“You— you have a pussy?”
“I can.”
And it shouldn’t surprise you, after everything else that’s happened in the last ten minutes, but it still does. Your breath stutters in your chest and your dick fills out even more against your hand and you distantly wonder how big Max made it, if it’s exactly what he wants. 
“Can I— Will you show me your pussy?” 
He leers at you when you ask, and it only turns you on even more. 
“I was hoping you’d go for that.”
He starts unbuttoning his shirt, but this whole mad situation has you feeling much more comfortable, in a fuck it kind of way. You step into his space and work the buttons free, and follow with your mouth. His skin is cold under the heat of your lips, and by the time his shirt hangs free from his shoulders you’ve made it your personal mission to warm up every inch of him. 
It’s easy to work his belt open, undo his fly and watch it open to a thick thatch of pubic hair. You pause to press your lips to his again, to reach around to cup his pert asscheeks as his slacks fall to the floor. 
You can’t stop grinding against him, even as you press him back and down onto the bed. You just follow, fully clothed, hesitant to deny yourself this new heady feeling of pressure to your cock. 
It’s only when he suckles your top lip and reaches down to palm you that you realize you’re teetering on the edge of embarrassing yourself. 
Your hips jolt away from him and it hurts a bit when you rip your lip out between his teeth, but all the better to take your mind off the intense, heavy arousal in your gut. 
“Okay?” 
He asks it with a smirk, like he already knows the answer, so you don’t give him one. You just stare down past your heaving chest to see the damp spot on your pants and start to unfasten them to relieve some of the pressure. 
“You’re gonna want to chill out. Refractory periods are annoying with those things,” he warns. 
You huff. 
“That’s kind of you,” you joke. 
It’s better, just in the thin fabric of your underwear, less resistant. You want to take them off too, but you’re afraid that the euphoria from seeing yourself with a dick will really conflate the issue at hand. 
So you shuffle down the bed a bit, and press your lips to Max’s flat chest, to his nipples that are half the size they were last time. They pebble quickly under your attention, and you bite down on one when you accidentally drag your cock along the mattress. 
He groans and arches into you, goads you on with a hand on the back of your neck. 
“Are you as good at eating pussy as you are at sucking dick?” 
It’s almost comical, the way he applies pressure to urge you further down his body. 
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
You nip at his sparse happy trail as he pushes you down with his large hand on your shoulder and delight in the way his muscles twitch under your mouth. 
“Some time this century, yeah.”
You hum, nose at the wiry curls on his mound and grab the wrist of his hand that’s still pressing on you. 
“You’re not very gentlemanly,” you tease.
He laughs as he stares down at you with his dark eyes. His hand moves to cup your jaw and you let it, let him trace your bottom lip with his thumb. 
“Is that what you want? A gentleman?”
You suck his thumb into your mouth as you shake your head, grinning around his knuckle. You bite down a little harder than you mean to and he hisses. He yanks his hand from your mouth to grab the back of your head and tug until your face is buried between his thighs. 
You relent, breathing in the scent of him, bypassing any preamble to shove your tongue inside of him. The way his hips buck into your face makes you smirk into his folds and dig your nails into the skin of his thighs. 
He still makes the most beautiful noises, when you get down to it. Desperate, hungry, eager. For as cocky as he is, he sure writhes against you like a shameless whore as he whispers curses into the dark room. 
You savor the taste of him, the warmth and tightness of him around your fingers, the scratchy feeling of his bush tickling your nose. The way his strong thighs tense and relax under your grasp makes you want to feel them do the same around your waist. 
You look up when he starts clenching around your fingers like a vice, and the thought of that feeling around your new dick makes you whimper into his pussy. You focus even more on the way you suckle and flick his clit, to try and set the arousal aside so you don’t come before you can even slip into him. 
He’s got his head thrown back, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, his back arched off the bed when he finally shudders and comes. You work him through it, lapping at his dripping hole, letting him grind against your tongue until he’s squirming away from your touch. 
You’re dragging this out. Stalling. You press little biting kisses to his thighs and his mound as he’s coming down. Maybe if you just worked him through one more, you’ll be calm enough to—
“C’mere already.”
You roll your eyes at him as he tugs on you, but you go willingly to hover over him and let him lick his taste from your mouth. His hums are lower and more subdued in the aftermath and they rumble deep in your chest as you try your hardest not to grind into him. 
It doesn’t matter. 
His free hand wraps around your cock and the feeling turns you on so much that you almost feel nauseous. You can feel all five of his fingers there, even with how big his hands are. He’s around you, and the familiar sensation on the inside mixed with the foreign sensation against your skin is a bit confusing but so hot. He squeezes and you jolt, bite down hard on his lip, but it only makes him chuckle. 
“That good, huh?” 
You groan into the crook of his neck in answer, completely at a loss for words. 
“I’d like to say the novelty wears off, but I haven’t found that it does.”
You feel like you’re on fire, honestly, like you’re trapped in a burning building with no way out. It’s hard to speak or breathe or think with his hand wrapped around you over your underwear. You can’t even begin to imagine how good his skin is going to feel against yours. 
“C’mon, handsome, lie back for me.”
You do, with his help, reclined back against his decorative pillows. Your breathing is ragged as he takes his time getting your shirt off and pressing surprisingly sweet kisses to everything revealed to him. 
You ground yourself by petting his hair, coarse and a little sticky from hair gel but thick enough to be extremely satisfying to card through. For a moment you’re able to focus on the feeling of it slipping between your fingers instead of the throbbing of your prick. 
But then his thick fingers find the elastic waistband and creep underneath. It shocks you out of your false sense of security. When your panicked eyes meet his, they’re so warm and soft you think you could maybe cry a little about it. But he speaks up instead. 
“Are you still okay with everything going on?”
And you are, even though you’re hanging by a thread and preemptively embarrassed by what’s about to go down; you want it so bad. 
So you nod. 
“Words, handsome.”
You huff. 
“Yes, Max. Please.”
He hums and smiles. 
“Good boy.”
You’re engulfed by embarrassment when your cock jumps dramatically at his words, right beneath his hovering face. You feel even hotter when he huffs out a laugh.
But then he’s pulling your underwear, and it’s there, in plain sight, a gorgeous cock. It’s perfect, it’s how you’ve always imagined yours would look if you had one. Like Max knew, somehow, was inside your brain and could see the same fantasies that you could. 
It jerks again in the cool air. You can feel the blood rushing there, a powerful gush that makes it twitch when you think about how it’s your dick, on your body. He hasn’t even touched you yet and you can feel pre-cum dripping down your shaft. 
“Can I taste?” He asks. 
You nod, then remember your words. 
“Please.”
You can’t produce more than a whisper as you watch him lean forward, like slow motion, with his tongue hanging out dramatically and his eyes locked on yours. 
The first touch of his tongue against your skin has your hips flying off the mattress at a speed that you’re sure defies laws of physics. 
He just looks so fucking gorgeous with your prick eclipsing the middle of his face. Your prick looks so gorgeous. God, you’re starting to understand where cis men get their audacity from. 
You tighten your grip on his hair for no other reason than you need something to hang onto or you might just float off into space. He teases you with more kitten licks, up one side, then the other, and you watch in awe. You can’t take your eyes off it, even though it may delay the inevitable if you could. 
He kisses the head of it, and his tongue does something wicked right underneath it that makes you tug his head back by his gelled locks. 
“Too much?” He asks, even as he winces at your tugging. 
“You’re teasing, and all that’s going to lead to is disappointment on your end.”
God, why do you sound like you’ve just run a marathon?
“I’ll never be disappointed by making you come, handsome.”
He’s so fucking annoying. You want to fuck his face just to shut him up, but you know that would only last about ten and a half seconds. 
You curse and close your eyes and dig your head back into the pillows. He must take it as a signal to continue, because bright, staticky stars burst behind your eyelids when he takes you into his mouth for the first time. 
Fuck. You’re inside him. It feels hot and wet, kind of squishy, but so tight when he sucks and sinks his mouth down even farther. 
You yell. The dramatic noise is ripped from your vocal chords without your consent, and your eyes fly open to look down at him. Those plush fucking lips look so goddamn good wrapped around you, all wet and red and swollen. You squeeze his hair in your hand. You’re so torn between wanting to chase the warmth of his mouth and wanting to arch away from it. 
Then you feel it, that familiar twisting deep and low in your gut, only it’s ten times as intense as it usually is. You start to panic. 
“Max! Max, please, I’m—!”
He pulls off quickly, and squeezes the base of your jerking dick. It kind of hurts, and you hiss and watch in horror and wait for something to come out. But it doesn’t. It’s so weird, the way he’s manually shut down your orgasm with one touch. Completely different than the way you would have had to hold back without this new dick. 
“That’s—”
“Incredible, right?” 
You huff in the midst of catching your breath. You still feel like a hair trigger, but without someone’s finger hovering over it now. 
“Oh my god,” you sigh. 
He laughs and lets go of you. You watch him wipe the corners of his pretty mouth and distantly think that you can’t wait until you get used to this, so you can make him gag and watch his drool and your cum seep from it. 
Your dick jerks at the thought, and it’s strange to have the evidence of your arousal be so obvious. It’s like a damn car alarm. 
“Wanna fuck me now?” 
You laugh, delirious. 
“My new nickname’s gonna be One Pump Chump.”
He slithers up the bed to lie beside you. 
“It’s totally understandable. Normal, even.”
You raise your eyebrow at him. 
“How big is the sample size?”
He shrugs and smirks but his eyes focus on the bedsheets between you. 
“I know I seem like a douchebag, but I really just wanna help.”
You pout at him, but fix your face before he looks back up at you. You run your hand through his hair, gently this time, and something about this whole situation is making your heart feel all gooey. 
“You only seem like a little bit of a douchebag.”
He grumbles at you but smiles. 
“Besides, there’s like, a billion things you’re gonna want to try with that thing. You’ll get practice.” 
That thing suddenly doesn’t feel as pressing anymore. You’re still hard as rock, but it finally feels like it would take a little more than a gentle breeze to make you spill. 
“Let me fuck you, then.”
“Yeah?”
You nod and smile; and some of that eagerness comes back to light up his devious eyes. He reaches for the condoms in the bedside table and you admire all of the taut muscles under his tan skin. 
“You want help with this?” 
You roll your eyes, but it’s kinda sweet. You’ve never actually put one on at this angle before. So you get between his thighs when he lies back and let him roll it on you. 
“You can definitely get someone pregnant with this too, so… be warned. Don’t sue me about it, it won’t go over well in court.”
Your dick bobs in his grasp as you laugh. It feels so weird and fascinating.  
“Noted, thank you for the disclaimer. And sorry about the lawsuit?” 
He squeezes your prick around the condom and smiles up at you. 
“No worries, that was decades ago.”
You laugh until the words catch up with you. But you don’t have time to question it much, because he’s lying back and spreading his thighs for you, getting a pillow under his hips so his glistening pussy is tilted perfectly. Your mouth waters at the sight of him so aroused and ready for you, and at the thought of how much more wet and tight and hot it’s going to feel compared to his mouth. 
You sigh and play with his little clit, still wet from your saliva. He keens and seeks out more friction and you have to fuck him. His pussy is even more enticing now, knowing you can slide your prick inside. 
You shuffle closer and try to remind yourself to take your time. You purposefully glide your hands up his thighs, feeling the way the hair gets more sparse and fine the further up you go. You’re delighted by the little goosebumps that form under your fingertips and the way he sounds so relaxed when he sighs. 
Shuffling even further now, you settle those thick thighs over your own and let your knees cage his slim hips. When you look up, he’s watching you through hooded eyes with his bottom lip between his teeth.
“You really are gorgeous,” you tell him, softly, afraid to disturb what’s becoming a very peaceful calm before the storm. 
His breath hitches a little and you see it as it ripples his chest. 
“You really are handsome,” he winks back. 
Your hand wanders up higher, across his ribs, and your thumb presses against his stiff nipple and rolls it. You feel the small noise he makes under your palm and smile. 
Your other hand grabs the base of your cock, sure to keep the base of the condom from slipping down. The subtle move kind of makes you feel like a pro, and you’d snicker about it if the euphoria that flooded through your body didn’t overwhelm you. 
It’s kind of like an out of body experience. But you’re also painfully aware of your body and this new appendage and the way the feeling of it is wreaking havoc on your entire being. 
You slide your cock through his wet folds and even just this feels incredible, the way every bit of him feels rubbing against your sensitive cockhead. You can’t drag it out any longer, you know. 
“Are you ready?” You ask him hesitantly. 
“Are you ready?” 
You snort and roll your eyes and pinch his nipple. His back arches and the movement makes your dick slip down, press just barely against his opening. You suck in a breath and it takes every ounce of willpower not to shove yourself inside to chase that wet heat. 
“Okay, okay, I’m ready. Just fuck me already. Gonna feel so good.”
For him or for you, you’re not sure which he means, but it doesn’t matter. 
You try to take your time. You really do. But as soon as the head of your prick slips in it’s like you have no self control. 
You chase the warmth, plunge all the way into him, and stay. 
Oh my god. 
“Oh my god.”
Max chuckles at you and you can feel it. You’re so fucking wrapped up in him. Every little move, shift, clench, it surrounds you and overwhelms you. 
“You feel so fucking good, Max.”
You’re sure you look absolutely wild. Your jaw is permanently dropped, eyes wide as you try with all of your might to hang on. 
“Ditto,” he breathes. 
His eyes look dark and intense, when your eyes can finally focus in. 
“Do you— did you make it exactly how you like?” 
It’s so stupid to be asking questions right now but it’s the only thing you have to keep you somewhat composed. 
“Yeah,” he admits, a little breathless. 
“You get off on that?”
You know he does before he answers, can feel him clench and contract around you. You muster up the dexterity to find his clit with your thumb and press. 
“I do! I do, fuck.”
You finally start to inch out of him, slowly, afraid that too much friction will send you over the edge. 
“Are you using me like a toy?” 
He whimpers, and the sound alone makes you snap your hips back into him. 
“No, no, that’s not it.”
Your brows rise up in question, and you pull out again as you wait for him to explain. 
“It’s— I dunno. I like that you… hah, shit, like that, don’t stop.”
You feel smug that you’ve derailed his thoughts by starting to fuck him with a slow rhythm, if only because he’s derailed yours a million times in the two nights you’ve shared. 
You circle his clit and groan at the way his pussy squeezes you. It’s hard to even pull out of him, it’s like he’s sucking you right back in. 
“You were saying?”
And it doesn’t sound smooth coming from your mouth, your breathing labored and your voice strained. 
“I like that you’ll think of me when you fuck. I like knowing I made you like this for me even if others get to enjoy it. I like knowing— shit— I like knowing I’m the one that makes you feel good.”
You balk at his confession. Such a beautiful explanation for something so possessive. From anyone else it would sound so objectifying. But with this strange relationship the two of you have, it makes your entire body burn. 
You collapse on top of him once the words really sink in. You hide your face in his sweaty neck and begin to rut into him with the knowledge that you’ll probably crumble far too quickly, but you don’t quite care. 
“You do, you make me feel so good,” you tell him. 
He whines and works his hips against yours to meet your frantic thrusts. You grab his hair again and bite faint marks into his neck that make him writhe and squirm against you. 
“You do too— harder, please, fuck me harder.”
Man, your hips are starting to ache, just like with your strap, but this time the sensation of feeling him wrapped around your very real cock keeps the discomfort at bay and it’s just pure bliss. 
So you double down, raise back up to put more of your back into it. Your sweaty hands slip against his skin as you try to grab his hips for leverage. 
“You gotta touch yourself for me,” you pant. 
The way he scrambles to comply just turns you on even more, gives you one more tick in the ‘power tripping’ column. He looks so fucking beautiful under you, back all arched in pleasure, his face scrunched up in concentration. His bicep is bulging as he slides three fingers back and forth across his clit, so frantic but so practiced. 
You fuck him and try to think about anything other than how good he feels. You’re plunging into the world’s softest, warmest hole and he’s moaning for you, you’re making him feel just as good as you do, and you’re going to lose it. 
“Gonna come, Max. I can’t—”
“Do it, come for me. Wanna be the first.”
Your hips stutter as the wave finally, finally crashes over you. You try so hard to fuck through it, try to make him come again, but as the first shock of your orgasm spikes up your spine, you can’t think to do anything but try to bury yourself as far as you can into his tight cunt. 
You know he’s saying something encouraging by the tone of his voice, but his words go in one ear and out the other as you grind into him and rest your sweaty forehead in the middle of his chest. It feels so good you could cry. 
Your fingertips dig into the flesh of his hips as you ride it out, and your chest starts to burn and your throat starts to ache and your eyes start to burn.
You are crying. 
“Shit.”
It comes out as a broken sob, muffled into his chest, and he starts at the sound. 
“Hey, it’s okay. Just breathe.”
You shake your head against him. 
“I’m fine.”
“I know, just breathe though.”
The breaths you suck in are all shuddery and stilted, and there’s snot, and it’s so embarrassing but comforting all at once. 
He urges you to slip out, and he even holds the condom for you, pulls it off, and ties it while you try to reel yourself in.
You don’t, not right away at least, because once you get over the crazy rush of endorphins and serotonin and dopamine or whatever that’s flooded your body, you start feeling extremely self conscious about the whole sobbing during sex thing, and the fact that he didn’t get off, and—
“Come snuggle?” 
You’re not sure when he got up, but he’s holding up a robe for you in one hand, and cradling your head in the other, and ushering you out into the living room. His fireplace is on now, and there’s a tall, snobby glass bottle of water on his end table. 
You’re tired, now. Like, bone-deep exhaustion. You slump into him where he’s sprawled out on his leather couch and close your watery eyes. 
“I’m sorry.”
He shushes you gently, pets your head that’s on his chest that definitely has your dried snot on it still. 
“Don’t be sorry. As long as you feel good, I feel good.”
You nod, and taking a deep breath comes easier to you this time. You brave a look up at him, and his eyes are warmer than ever as they reflect the orange-yellow flames.
“Thank you.”
He smirks then, and you feel the tension in the room shift. 
“So how was it?”
You grin and hide it in his pecs. You’re hyper aware of your spent dick lying soft and sticky on your thigh. You’re so much more tired than you ever usually are after an orgasm. It was all so different, every little bit of it. And there’s this calmness you feel now, after all the commotion, and it hits you all at once that it all feels right. 
There’s no cleaning your strap, putting away your toys, no sliding on your underwear to hide the thing that just gave you pleasure. There’s no awkward dissonance. It’s just… normal. Normal in a way it’s never been before. Effortless bliss, like a sensory deprivation tank. Nothing. 
“It was everything.”
-
Author's Note: I wanted to share a bit about what really resonated with me as I learned more about Loki. The one thing that stuck with me throughout this writing challenge is that Loki is not a bad guy. I will be honest, the only thing I knew about Loki before this was from the MCU, which to me seems like an oversimplification of the norse god from everything I've learned about him. Erin provided me with this very thorough video that analyzes Loki and his myths. To me, he seems like someone who liked to 'stir the shit' for the sake of curiosity. I didn't find much ill will at all in these tellings of his trickery, just a guy who wanted to fuck around and find out about things, someone who did more than just wonder what would happen.
Second, Erin said he's Like a fun older brother. Very playful and mischievous. Very straight-forward. Protector of outcasts; lgbtq+ folks, disabled people, neurodivergent people, etc. This was another driving force behind this fic. It wasn't a coincidence that Max met reader their first night at the club, they founded the club for the sole purpose of creating a safe space for queer people and takes an active role in making sure their patrons feel like they belong.
Lastly, Erin said their pick for me would be Max / Loki because of the gender fuckery, which excited me as much as it made me feel honored. When watching the aforementioned video, I learned about Loki turning himself and Thor into a bridesmaid and a bride, respectively. Loki himself was unrecognizable and was the exact image of a woman. However, Thor pretty much just looked like himself in a dress (this is paraphrasing.) I loved the idea that Loki's shapeshifting could not only be directed toward other people, but could vary in vagueness. These undefined rules for Loki’s gender felt like how I personally view gender in general, as well as how I relate it to my own identity, and I really took that idea and ran with it.
Anyway, thank you again @perotovar for this writing challenge and the piece of yourself you shared with all of us. I love you so much! <3
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nottsbitch · 2 days
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You Know - L.B.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
summary: Finally confronting Enzo
contains smut
✩✩✩✩
It had been a week since you found out about Enzo, and that was the last time that he had visited you.
You figured it was because he was busy or maybe he realized what he was doing was weird. But in reality, he knew that you knew, as soon as he caught you staring at him he knew. You never gave him the time of day now he felt your eyes on him every time you were in the same room which could only mean one thing. You knew.
He took that as his sign to back off until things blew over. So now as he sat in the back corner of the library he couldn't help himself as his thoughts drifted to you. He missed seeing you of course but didn't want to risk things.
As he sat in his daydream about you, he was completely oblivious to you talking to his friends.
"I just need to know where he is Riddle." You rolled your eyes realizing that your conversation with Matteo and Theo was currently going nowhere.
"What could you possibly want with our sweet little Enzo?" This came from Theo.
Both of the men in front of you were shocked that you were looking for Enzo. To their knowledge, the two of you had never spoken a word to each other and now you were basically begging for his location.
"I need to talk to him" They could tell you were getting more and more annoyed the longer you stood there.
"Last time I saw him he was going to the library. Don't sneak up on him he might faint when he realizes it's you." Both boys had known about their friend's longtime crush on you and smirked as you stomped away from them.
You were quick in the halls not giving yourself any time to think about what you were going to say when you reached him, which was quicker than you thought.
Before you knew it you were stopped in front of him "What is wrong with you?"
Enzo stuck in his own thoughts didn't notice you until you opened your mouth "Excuse me?" You could see the twinkle in his eye as he held back his smirk.
"I know what you were doing, all of a sudden I catch you in the act then you disappear. You are nowhere to be found, won't even look in my direction, and I feel like I'm losing my mind." At this point, he couldn't hold back the smile on his face.
"I don't know what you're talking about." The fake curiosity was genuine in his voice.
At this moment it felt like your body and your mind were wanting two different things, and before you even realized you had moved you were in the seat so close to the man next to you he could feel your breath on his cheek.
Leaning into his ear you whispered "Cut the bullshit, Enzo"
"All I'm hearing right now is that you're desperate for attention." If he wanted to play this game you weren't going to make it easy on him.
You put on your most innocent face before looking him in the eyes "Only if it's coming from you."
Though he thought he was doing a good job at keeping his poker face you could see right through him. You knew you were effecting him as much as he was effecting you making it just as easy for you to get into his head.
"So this is okay?" He whispered as his hand found its way to your thigh, causing you to momentarily forget why this conversation even started.
As his hand moved up your thigh you were confused by the fact that his head went back down to his book pretending to focus on whatever he was doing before you got there. With an innocent look on his face, it contrasted the fact that things didn't stay innocent for long.
He leaned into you, his other arm tightening on your waist as he used you to pull your chair closer to his.
You still hadn't responded to him instead choosing silence waiting to see how far this would actually go. You leaned your head back against his shoulder, letting your eyelids flutter as he brought his lips to your neck.
"Lost your words?" He paused his assault on your neck to whisper in your ear, Causing you to move your hand to his thigh giving it a warning squeeze.
You still felt his breath on your skin causing goosebumps to erupt all over your body. Enzo knew what he was doing of course and he was loving the reaction he was getting.
You felt your walls coming down by each second the teasing continued. You chose this. moment to look into his eyes noticing how dark they had gotten. You were fucked.
He smirked, his lips finding their way back to your ear "You gotta stay quiet."
His words sent shivers down your spine, as his hand started to massage your inner thigh, his fingertips getting awfully close to where you wanted them most but not giving you that satisfaction.
You let out a breath and adjust yourself, spreading your legs even wider. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Enzo smirk as he squeezed your thigh hard, before finally moving his hand. He started off slow, his hands teasing you over your underwear.
At this point, you had forgotten where you were. Enzo had snuck his fingers underneath your underwear now and was circling them on your clit. You were biting down on your lip trying to hold back a moan at the sudden wave of pleasure, of course Enzo noticed.
"Not a sound." He whispered making you even more aroused. He started increasing his pace, making your hips start to grind softly against him. You were soaked now and this was only more encouragement for Enzo.
You had dug your nails into his thigh and buried your head in his shoulder, hoping it would muffle the sounds you couldn't hold in any longer. His head had leaned against yours, and at the same time, he pushed a finger inside of you, curving it up to hit your g-spot.
Your mouth fell open, and you groaned against his neck as he slid his finger in and out of you. The rush of being caught was turning you on even more. You felt another wave of pleasure run through you that only intensified as he added another finger.
His eyes had not left your face once, enjoying the effect he was having on you. He watched as your eyes closed when he pushed even deeper inside of you.
Your legs had started to twitch and you were biting your tongue hoping to stay quiet on the brink of your orgasm. He brought his ear down your face so he could hear you say the words.
"I'm close." He pulled his face away and looked into your eyes, a smug look on his face as he slowed down his fingers until he came to a complete stop.
"Remember who has the upper hand here."
You couldn't stop your jaw from dropping as you watched him pack up his things as if nothing had happened.
"I'll see you soon." Turning and leaving before you could get a single word out.
"What just happened?" You said to no one except yourself trying to wrap your head around if this was a dream or not, but the wetness in your underwear told you everything you needed to know.
✩✩✩✩
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mamawasatesttube · 7 months
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i'm thinking about revamping the superfam secret santa blog and doing a superfam summertime giftswap, but i think before i do that i need a) another person to help with matching because it got a lil bigger than i anticipated last time,
and b) to figure out how to word "if you're gonna join with prompts that aren't with the spirit of the event (as in. the couple of people who showed up for secret santa with Only tim/kon or super/bat prompts. instead of anything about. yknow. the superfam.)... idk man don't do that like come on lmao" into the rules. ldkfjlks
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skippingseaglass · 4 months
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chat i think this is why they say that social media is bad for people
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Note
Phullo it is I again!
I am very glad that you actually responded and given me an actual advice since I was worried about the question I sent you.
Though besides that I have another question for you (hoorayyy)!
So, about the reading books earlier- I’m fortunately a bookworm too! It’s just that I notice I prefer reading the genre science fiction/psychological horror more than… anything else!
And while the books I am currently reading, ‘Flowers For Algernon’ and ‘I’m Thinking Of Ending Things’ (these books are seriously so wonderfully made they make want to tear my walls), DO have romantic aspects of it- it’s not really the main plot of the story..
‘Flowers For Algernon’ has amazing storytelling and is very unique- though I’m not sure if you’ve read it before but, it’s actually just the main character taking notes. Hence why there was a lot misspellings which honestly makes it a great touch if you know the context behind it.
On the other hand, ‘I’m Thinking Of Ending Things’ too shares the same uniqueness as the other, possibly even more unique if I must say so myself. Though I REALLY don’t want to make my story similar to them since I want to make it more heart warming than fucked up..
Which is why I feel like I have the need to borrow or buy at least one romantic book because, I lack of it. I mean I accidentally borrowed it one time but it was kind of disappointing.
I don’t know if its a good idea and if I should do it or not since does it really matter of the genre, or just the writing?
Still, if you have any good books that are in the romance genre. Feel free to recommend some to me!
-lots of love, from another bookworm
welcome back! happy to hear you're a bookworm as well <3 im writing those titles down since i read a criminal lack of sci-fi despite loving it
i actually don't have any straight up romance recs - i don't actively search it out (outside of fanfic), so any romance i read just comes with whatever book i've picked up. just straight up romance bores me, unless its a fic with a pairing i actively like. and even then, i need to take breaks from it unless the romance is interspersed with an actual plot. im not a romantically-geared person! i dont have single Main Plot Is Romance book on my shelves!
but imo its really just the quality of writing that helps. ive never been in a romance, im the child of two different divorces, and yet ive been told that i write romance fairly well. go fuckin figure lmao.
so actually my advice on romance is to just like. wow idk what i do is pick apart the romances i see on tv / in writing. what makes them good together, how do they act around each other, what are their love languages, what's their dynamic, what traditional romance things do they partake in, what dont they partake in, do they have anything nontraditional, do they work and why do / they dont they - does that make their relationship more interesting or is it flat. are they a good match.
you don't have to have every answer, but ive found that at least understanding their characters / dynamics, and having them interact in a way that suits them will help your romance feel natural. dont conform to tropes or tradition, that will just make the relationship flat and unrealistic. and you can always sprinkle in little things that you like / would like, which will help ground the romance and get you into the groove
tldr with romance, i think it's better to observe real life (whether that's paying attention to couples or reading reddit threads) & analyze in-love or in-a-relationship characters instead of just reading romance novels. bc honestly, and from what i can tell, they can tend to be over the top or cookie cutter
just realized you did not explicitly ask for romance advice! Oopsie! i got a little carried away here....
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fruitybashir · 7 months
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I'm actually really wondering how Bojan feels about... everything, cause Kris is just in denial but he's clearly very deeply in love. But what about Bojan? Does he know that he is in love with Kris? Is he also in denial? I don't think he really knows but maybe he does feel it but can't place the feeling?
You probably can't really answer this without spoiling, but I just had to ask.
😌
sorry i started typing out two tags and then just kept going i shouldve just put this all here but now its too late argh. sorry </3
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acaciapines · 4 months
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guys what if i told you ive been thinking about dess and actually i think dess/chara might be able to work out in the drkau...like ive been doing some thinking into dess and her reasons and why she does what she does and how she cares about people and im starting to nail down the role i want asriel to play, and. and.
guys i think dess is actually going to be able to change. i think dess figures out how to change but asriel never does....
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milkstoner · 2 months
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I don't have an insta 😔
I do have to respect that honestly.
#instagram is one of the worse social media apps i use it only to post my own photography and scroll on my fyp which is well curated somehow#btw if you’re trying to date dont communicate on instagram#exchange numbers. keep that boundary and keep it sacred#dont let whoever ur trying to date see your social media presence#even worse if their dms are on silent who tf are you and whose dms are you trying to avoid?surely not mine#how are you going to set up a date with me when your insta DMs are on silent. you havent responded to me and its been 6 hours the day of!!!#how is it 3 pm and its your day off and we were supposed to have a date but youre acting like youre beyoncé omg text me the fuck back#plus you haven’t texted me two whole days#and im mad about it cause that’s a very attractive long haired peruvian man i mean wow! fuck this#had to block cause even if there wasn’t any commitment im not letting myself be disrespected the fuck#anyway if a man asks for your Snapchat specifically he is a serial killer and he will murder you OR he is twenty years old or younger#if a man asks for your TikTok he thinks youre in high school. we all are too classy for TikTok#TikTok is the temu of apps just trashy altogether. you open and there’s aliexpress-reminiscent ads…ew…I’ve only posted a few times#but every time i open the app i feel like I’ll catch lice it just feels unclean#we talk about twitter and how ass it is to use which is fair but tiktok is worse i mean…UI nightmare#a man that uses TikTok is off the deep end you can’t save him#he’s frying up his attention span. meaning he wont be able to focus on you as he should because you are a queen#instead he’ll think about skibidi toilet or some shit does anyone know what that is?i dont#imagine kissing a man having no idea he has that fucking ‘oh no oh no oh nonono’ audio stuck in his head#a man should read a book and even then that should be fucking controlled#im reading Freud right now and its torture. tbf it does happen to be sexuality theories#girl its fucking gross#academia is cooked cause in what world do i get creds for reading the most wack books in the history of ever?#I’ve read 11 books and half of them were boring#this Freud included and its repulsive to read and not even true.#why is it 2024 and im still being taught untrue info just cause old man from old times wrote it#i could clear freud. he literally was a cokehead#in the end he’s a man like the rest of them and if you show him TikTok his brain cells will be cooked#so who won?
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angorwhosebabyisthis · 7 months
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having a lot of thoughts about how people use 'normalize' when they mean 'destigmatize' or 'make the nature of into common knowledge,' and how they conflate 'the perception of this thing as normal' with the thing actually being a normal occurrence, and how it is in fact incredibly harmful to try to convince people that an ideal situation is normal when that does not map onto their lived reality or the dangers they need to be aware of to avoid. it is 3:33am though so writing up an actual poast about it will have to wait for later
#whosebaby talks#this post brought to you by 'spreading awareness of what an abusive relationship is and looks like compared to a nonabusive relationship'#'is fantastic and i support it fully and think it's deeply important. giving people the false idea that abusive relationships are uncommon'#'and are flukes that go against the grain of society functioning as it normally does; is insanely dangerous to people who are potential#targets; and incredibly alienating and isolating and cruel to people who have already been targets'#'in uniquely awful ways depending on whether they're already aware of that or aren't. don't fucking do that'#it applies much more broadly than that; but it's an instance i think about A Lot and it's what led me to this line of thought to start with#there's also 'normal does not mean good and saying so has incredibly unbelievably harmful implications keep that shit out of your mouth'#but that is so obvious it boggles my mind that it has to be explained to anyone on this site; and it is talked about often enough#that i would rather focus on the parts i don't really see talked about much; if at all#also like the fact that 'statistically average' normal vs 'things are functioning as they usually do' is a critically important distinction#they are closely related and interplay heavily with each other but they are Not the Same Thing#and how 'normal' can refer to different layers and aspects of a subject--people with rare health conditions are not statistically average#and that by itself is fine. and those people having conditions that are disruptive to the usual functioning of a space or system#is avoidable in some cases by establishing as much infrastructure as possible to integrate their more common needs smoothly#and unavoidable in others; which means the normal functioning of a system/space that accommodates people with unexpected needs#has to account *for its normal functioning being disrupted sometimes*#and bend around that disruption without either breaking down or rolling right over the disabled people who Cause Problems#and at the same time 'rare health condition' gets applied to health conditions that are not rare *at all* to not only justify not bothering#to make the system integrate their needs in general when it could do so easily; but make it so that accommodating their needs anyway puts#immense and unnecessary strain on the system; so there is zero margin for anything you didn't specifically fight tooth and nail for already#anyway it's a really extensive subject and a fascinating one. for later. sleep now#abuse cw#ableism cw#the salt files#is there a name for that tag
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forehead451 · 1 day
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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phantomrose96 · 7 months
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If anyone wants to know why every tech company in the world right now is clamoring for AI like drowned rats scrabbling to board a ship, I decided to make a post to explain what's happening.
(Disclaimer to start: I'm a software engineer who's been employed full time since 2018. I am not a historian nor an overconfident Youtube essayist, so this post is my working knowledge of what I see around me and the logical bridges between pieces.)
Okay anyway. The explanation starts further back than what's going on now. I'm gonna start with the year 2000. The Dot Com Bubble just spectacularly burst. The model of "we get the users first, we learn how to profit off them later" went out in a no-money-having bang (remember this, it will be relevant later). A lot of money was lost. A lot of people ended up out of a job. A lot of startup companies went under. Investors left with a sour taste in their mouth and, in general, investment in the internet stayed pretty cooled for that decade. This was, in my opinion, very good for the internet as it was an era not suffocating under the grip of mega-corporation oligarchs and was, instead, filled with Club Penguin and I Can Haz Cheezburger websites.
Then around the 2010-2012 years, a few things happened. Interest rates got low, and then lower. Facebook got huge. The iPhone took off. And suddenly there was a huge new potential market of internet users and phone-havers, and the cheap money was available to start backing new tech startup companies trying to hop on this opportunity. Companies like Uber, Netflix, and Amazon either started in this time, or hit their ramp-up in these years by shifting focus to the internet and apps.
Now, every start-up tech company dreaming of being the next big thing has one thing in common: they need to start off by getting themselves massively in debt. Because before you can turn a profit you need to first spend money on employees and spend money on equipment and spend money on data centers and spend money on advertising and spend money on scale and and and
But also, everyone wants to be on the ship for The Next Big Thing that takes off to the moon.
So there is a mutual interest between new tech companies, and venture capitalists who are willing to invest $$$ into said new tech companies. Because if the venture capitalists can identify a prize pig and get in early, that money could come back to them 100-fold or 1,000-fold. In fact it hardly matters if they invest in 10 or 20 total bust projects along the way to find that unicorn.
But also, becoming profitable takes time. And that might mean being in debt for a long long time before that rocket ship takes off to make everyone onboard a gazzilionaire.
But luckily, for tech startup bros and venture capitalists, being in debt in the 2010's was cheap, and it only got cheaper between 2010 and 2020. If people could secure loans for ~3% or 4% annual interest, well then a $100,000 loan only really costs $3,000 of interest a year to keep afloat. And if inflation is higher than that or at least similar, you're still beating the system.
So from 2010 through early 2022, times were good for tech companies. Startups could take off with massive growth, showing massive potential for something, and venture capitalists would throw infinite money at them in the hopes of pegging just one winner who will take off. And supporting the struggling investments or the long-haulers remained pretty cheap to keep funding.
You hear constantly about "Such and such app has 10-bazillion users gained over the last 10 years and has never once been profitable", yet the thing keeps chugging along because the investors backing it aren't stressed about the immediate future, and are still banking on that "eventually" when it learns how to really monetize its users and turn that profit.
The pandemic in 2020 took a magnifying-glass-in-the-sun effect to this, as EVERYTHING was forcibly turned online which pumped a ton of money and workers into tech investment. Simultaneously, money got really REALLY cheap, bottoming out with historic lows for interest rates.
Then the tide changed with the massive inflation that struck late 2021. Because this all-gas no-brakes state of things was also contributing to off-the-rails inflation (along with your standard-fare greedflation and price gouging, given the extremely convenient excuses of pandemic hardships and supply chain issues). The federal reserve whipped out interest rate hikes to try to curb this huge inflation, which is like a fire extinguisher dousing and suffocating your really-cool, actively-on-fire party where everyone else is burning but you're in the pool. And then they did this more, and then more. And the financial climate followed suit. And suddenly money was not cheap anymore, and new loans became expensive, because loans that used to compound at 2% a year are now compounding at 7 or 8% which, in the language of compounding, is a HUGE difference. A $100,000 loan at a 2% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, accrues to $121,899. A $100,000 loan at an 8% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, more than doubles to $215,892.
Now it is scary and risky to throw money at "could eventually be profitable" tech companies. Now investors are watching companies burn through their current funding and, when the companies come back asking for more, investors are tightening their coin purses instead. The bill is coming due. The free money is drying up and companies are under compounding pressure to produce a profit for their waiting investors who are now done waiting.
You get enshittification. You get quality going down and price going up. You get "now that you're a captive audience here, we're forcing ads or we're forcing subscriptions on you." Don't get me wrong, the plan was ALWAYS to monetize the users. It's just that it's come earlier than expected, with way more feet-to-the-fire than these companies were expecting. ESPECIALLY with Wall Street as the other factor in funding (public) companies, where Wall Street exhibits roughly the same temperament as a baby screaming crying upset that it's soiled its own diaper (maybe that's too mean a comparison to babies), and now companies are being put through the wringer for anything LESS than infinite growth that Wall Street demands of them.
Internal to the tech industry, you get MASSIVE wide-spread layoffs. You get an industry that used to be easy to land multiple job offers shriveling up and leaving recent graduates in a desperately awful situation where no company is hiring and the market is flooded with laid-off workers trying to get back on their feet.
Because those coin-purse-clutching investors DO love virtue-signaling efforts from companies that say "See! We're not being frivolous with your money! We only spend on the essentials." And this is true even for MASSIVE, PROFITABLE companies, because those companies' value is based on the Rich Person Feeling Graph (their stock) rather than the literal profit money. A company making a genuine gazillion dollars a year still tears through layoffs and freezes hiring and removes the free batteries from the printer room (totally not speaking from experience, surely) because the investors LOVE when you cut costs and take away employee perks. The "beer on tap, ping pong table in the common area" era of tech is drying up. And we're still unionless.
Never mind that last part.
And then in early 2023, AI (more specifically, Chat-GPT which is OpenAI's Large Language Model creation) tears its way into the tech scene with a meteor's amount of momentum. Here's Microsoft's prize pig, which it invested heavily in and is galivanting around the pig-show with, to the desperate jealousy and rapture of every other tech company and investor wishing it had that pig. And for the first time since the interest rate hikes, investors have dollar signs in their eyes, both venture capital and Wall Street alike. They're willing to restart the hose of money (even with the new risk) because this feels big enough for them to take the risk.
Now all these companies, who were in varying stages of sweating as their bill came due, or wringing their hands as their stock prices tanked, see a single glorious gold-plated rocket up out of here, the likes of which haven't been seen since the free money days. It's their ticket to buy time, and buy investors, and say "see THIS is what will wring money forth, finally, we promise, just let us show you."
To be clear, AI is NOT profitable yet. It's a money-sink. Perhaps a money-black-hole. But everyone in the space is so wowed by it that there is a wide-spread and powerful conviction that it will become profitable and earn its keep. (Let's be real, half of that profit "potential" is the promise of automating away jobs of pesky employees who peskily cost money.) It's a tech-space industrial revolution that will automate away skilled jobs, and getting in on the ground floor is the absolute best thing you can do to get your pie slice's worth.
It's the thing that will win investors back. It's the thing that will get the investment money coming in again (or, get it second-hand if the company can be the PROVIDER of something needed for AI, which other companies with venture-back will pay handsomely for). It's the thing companies are terrified of missing out on, lest it leave them utterly irrelevant in a future where not having AI-integration is like not having a mobile phone app for your company or not having a website.
So I guess to reiterate on my earlier point:
Drowned rats. Swimming to the one ship in sight.
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vamptastic · 3 months
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everytime friends complain to me about dating or i read stuff about it online it's just a circus of miscommunication... how can you like somebody enough to date or sleep with them and not be able to talk with them like a normal person. i think going on dates with ppl you don't know that well sounds kinda fun but not if there's a million unspoken rules around it.
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nexttothelamp · 4 months
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.....
#the legal battle will take so long#this is going to be the hardest thing ive ever done and maybe will ever do#life has and will change forever. for the better? i hope but i dont know#is this the right thing to do? yes#does that make it easier? ....only slightly. and itll have to be enough. and i realize now that it is#but oh god does it hurt. im a victim too maybe the oldest one? oldest one alive anyway. that i know of#i cant. believe it#hindsight is 40/20 in this case but fuck#a part of me wants to tell him#to pull him aside and say#i know what you did. i know what you did and its going to come out.#and if it was only in the past i might choose to let the dead rest#but i cant let you near those kids. i can only pray to a god i dont believe in that its not already too late#but baby axel still has a chance#i know with this shit system i wont be able to take the kids from derek#but i can put you away and maybe thatll be enough#i wanna tell him that im going to the police and they WILL be coming to his mothers house#and i wanna tell him that because i loved him. So MUCH once#that im giving him the chance to kill himself and take the cowards way out before its too late#i... mean that a little too and that hurts the most#i cant kill him even though id like to choke the life out of him myself#i cant ruin my life for the man that tried to already#but it would save us all so much trouble if he did us all a favor and shot himself in the fucking skull#theres always going to be more kids and hes gotten to 4 over 2 decades at least. and those are only the ones i know for certain#hes just a pedophile. it makes so much sense now#fuck. fuck.#maybe in a few days ill be able to think about something else#can barely focus on trump getting convicted lol#id say delete later but i wont
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houseofpurplestars · 7 months
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What really gets me about the sentiment "Don't look away" is that its always used in the wrong context. People may be well meaning, but what they end up doing is flooding the conversation with zionist carnage in a manner not unlike the way zionists *want* their atrocities to be seen.
Rather than thinking, "I must traumatize myself with this image for Palestine," try, "I will not turn my back on the people of Palestine." Watching them die is not enough. Speaking only of their suffering is not enough.
Don't look away when Palestinians resist. Don't condemn them when they fight for their lives and land. Speak for their rights to live and move freely in their own homeland. Do not look away from their life. Palestinians are here, they remain, and they will remain, and they are in the future, and they will live free and happy lives just as anyone else should be able to.
"Don't look away" should not be a call to engage in real life atrocities like its a horror movie. "Don't look away" should be a call to make Palestine the focus of everything. Don't let people FORGET or IGNORE what is happening. You can talk about what is happening without sharing the same ghoulish photos that zionists love.
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