#like. what are the lucius/mary parallels

[iggy-hands]

The Widow Bonnet and Lucius Spriggs art collab of the CENTURY

[queerfandomtrifecta]

So a lot is bothering me about the narrative structure of season two. If I didn’t have my own novel to work on and didn’t have several more edits commissioned, I’d write a fix-it fic for all of season two to fix the narrative stuff and to really delve into character arcs that felt off. Maybe I will anyway. Idk. If someone who actually has time wants to take any or all of this and write a fic, go for it. Can’t wait to read it. Anyway, this is a very rough outline that’s subject to change if I do write the fic, but from a developmental editing perspective, here’s my two cents nobody asked for on season 2:

Thematic elements: Atonement and coping with trauma, the crew leaving (especially in regards to Stede’s emotional wound where he’s worried about people being better off without him) and identity (especially in regards to Ed/Stede/Izzy). These are present in the show as-is, but they don’t play out well just yet. I’m focusing on these to make things cohesive.

Episodes 1-3: mostly perfect. Loved these and the pacing felt correct for the most part. I would keep the tone from these episodes through the season. Ricky would be introduced here. Zheng is fantastic and all of her stuff stays here.

What I’d change: Ned Low would be the primary antagonist for this season. Ricky would be set up through this season to be the primary antagonist next season. Ned Low’s record is Ed’s original suicide by proxy plan, and that needs to be introduced here. There needs to be a scene showing how Ned tortures people in these episodes. Izzy needs to bring it up as a concern to Ed. Ed doesn’t care about the crew’s safety, obviously, someone (Izzy) needs to mention Ned’s record and possible repercussions here. I’d also NOT play Lucius’s trauma reveal with Stede like a comedy beat. (Like seriously, I HATE that the show played SA as a comedy beat.) Black Pete would be shown crying of Lucius so it’s not just told randomly after the fact. Olu would be shown missing Jim.

Episode 4: The unicorn thing with Izzy was beautiful and I’d keep that. Stede and Ed going to Mary and Anne’s is fine. Buttons can APPEAR to turn into a seagull.

What I’d change: The Kraken Crew and Lucius need to stay paranoid longer. They need to tally things up and realize that Low’s record has been broken (I think Ed was too checked out from reality/high on rhino horn to even realize he’d broken it; Izzy has bigger things going on and likely also lost track) but that record being broken was NEVER shown in the original, just told after the fact. In order to NOT switch to a speculative genre randomly for a convenient metaphor, Buttons appears to turn into a seagull but he doesn’t literally. Revealed to the audience but not to Ed/Stede (more on this later). Stede doesn’t put it to a vote that Ed can come back. He’s the captain and decides that that’s how it’s gonna be. The crew is also gonna look to former first-mate Frenchie (whose trauma is in a box) for direction when Izzy is struggling. It’s Frenchie’s idea about the leg. Izzy is still struggling a little more after his new leg, and I think he should be shown happy at the end but with a bottle of something not far from him (but more in that later).

Episode 5: Ed’s influencer non-apology clearly written by Stede works. Ed and Stede need time apart. The cursed suit can stay for the levity of it. Ed and Fang can go fishing. The moonlight kiss scene works for the most part.

What I’d change: Izzy can be sassy with Lucius, and a bit of a mentor to Stede, but he’s going to be drinking in this episode. Not plastered drunk like ep 4, but it’s gonna clearly be a struggle and everyone is just Not Talking About It. Lucius might start to parallel that a bit and I’d like to see more interaction with them there. I’d also like to see the Kraken Crew (all the crew really) treating Izzy as their captain. Stede says he doesn’t feel like the captain and there should be a reason for that. If he forced them to let Ed back on the boat in ep 4, that can be addressed here. Izzy is following Stede so he can eventually persuade everyone they have to as well, though Izzy’s earned more trust than anyone at this point. I’d delve into him doing for Stede what he did for Ed pre-season one (“massaged the crew” when Ed’s moods seemed off to keep things running (I can’t remember the exact quote past that, but that’s essentially the idea). The Kraken Crew needs to be wary of Ed longer. They do not believe Buttons is a seagull. They all think Ed killed him and Stede says he didn’t see Buttons turn into a seagull, but he takes Ed’s side and doesn’t think Ed killed him. That starts a rift and an “us or Ed” thing that’ll play out later. Ed can try to interact with the crew and get the cold shoulder. He’s done nothing to restore his reputation. As far as the cursed suit goes, I would have them receive some sort of warning from Ned Low when they go to pawn the suit off on the other ship. Stede or/or Izzy would keep it quiet from the crew, who are only just now starting to follow Stede as the captain. Ricky needs to be shown here wanting to end piracy, and interacting with Zheng. After the moonlight kiss, I’d have them holding hands as they walk off. I think maybe Lucius would want to leave the ship here. The Swede and Buttons are gone already, and it makes sense for Lucius to want to leave but Black Pete to want to stay. They’ll both still be on board here though.

Episode 6: Calypso’s Birthday will be the plot for 7/8.

What I’d change: let me preface this by saying I haven’t worked Zheng’s plot fixes out fully. But. If we’re moving this to the next two episodes, something has to happen here. I’d keep the bit with the guilt room and with Ed giving away treasure to the urchins saying don’t be pirates, but have him say more in front of Stede about how piracy is bad for specific reasons that Stede just doesn’t clock as Ed wanting to stop. I think the plot will be along the lines of Stede engaging in more piracy. Ed will quietly be struggling with the fact that Stede is becoming a more and more proficient pirate in his own way, Ed himself not wanting to pirate anymore, and his tentative new relationship with the captain of a ship he is definitely not wanted on by anyone other than Stede. Zheng needs to interact with Ricky here about him wanting to end piracy. Izzy is a good first mate here but he’s still drinking. Lucius may start to parallel that here. Former first mate Frenchie picks up the slack and falls into a leadership role when Izzy is struggling too much, and this is eventually gonna cause him to have to deal with his trauma that’s bottled up, when he has to talk to Izzy about clearly not handling his own. Eventually, things will come to a head with the crew not wanting Ed on board. It becomes an “us vs him” thing with the crew threatening to leave if Es doesn’t. Stede will try to smooth things over but Ed will interrupt and say don’t bother, he’s leaving. He doesn’t know who he is but at least fisherman would be better than pirate. Episode ends with Stede heartbroken and Ed going off to fish in something that isn’t his leathers, so he wouldn’t be recognizable from a distance. Low pinpoints Stede’s ship but doesn’t see Ed on it, and plans to bait him out by boarding and torturing the crew.

Episodes 7-8: Nope. I’d keep almost none of this.

What I’d change: This part is also still rough and I need to flesh it out a bit more, BUT: Calypso’s birthday would be episode 7. The crew would wanna party but also wanna cheer up their sulking captain. They’re glad Ed is gone. Izzy is a good first mate here but still drinking. He encourages the party to Stede who agrees. They’re spending Ed’s treasure that he’s left, turning the poison into positivity by getting rid of the bad memories the Kraken Crew has of obtaining it. Stede and Izzy bond a lot here. Ned Low does interrupt the party (I think maybe he’s also “working” with Ricky but not really, he has his own agenda) planning to bait Ed back. The scene in Stede’s quarters would be Izzy and Stede, not Ed and Stede. Once again the crew are suffering for Ed’s actions, and THAT is how Ed can atone for it. He can save them, probably with the help of Zheng who he’ll have met when he goes off to be a fisherman. So there’s some camaraderie going there. Also, with help from Lucius and Black Pete, who will have to trust him in order to save the crew/themselves. Stede will be the one to kill Ned Low, and he and Ed will still impulsively sleep together as a coping mechanism at the end of episode 8. Izzy is still alive and well (though still drinking a lot; and I think this could be a key to Frenchie having to confront trauma instead of locking it in the box), and things aren’t smoothed out with Ed and Izzy yet, that’s for next season, Ed has ACTUALLY done something to earn the crew’s trust back, and it appears to be a happy enough ending for Ed and Stede. Also, IF Ed says “I love you”, Stede is GONNA say “I love you too” because WTAF was that in the show?! But I’d end the season with La Vie en Rose and fireworks, Izzy happy and celebrating with the crew, a happy moment for Ed/Stede, the antagonist defeated, and Ed actually having atoned for his previous actions.

All of this is rough, but it’s my original thoughts. If anyone wants to use the base of this to write a fix-it fic, go for it. I may do it myself if I can find the time between work writing responsibilities.

[brigdh]

I was thinking more about how Stede doesn't really have an arc this season (see my previous criticism here), and I've decided that what I would have loved to see was Stede actively attempting to court Ed.

Now, we did get a little of this in the first few episodes: Stede's letters in 2x01 are great, I love his attempting to track Ed down via a crime-map in 2x02, and of course the "I'll never leave you. I'll never leave again" speech at the end of 2x03 is fantastic. But once Stede and Ed are both in the same location and conscious, there's really nothing. Stede just hangs around, waiting for Ed to figure himself out, or take the lead, or something, I don't know, but Stede's certainly doesn't take any action to progress their relationship himself. He's such a static character in the second half of S2.

But! Imagine instead the arc where Stede is actively trying to romance Ed! I don't need him to be good at it; it's probably a better character arc if he isn't, in fact. Maybe he comes on way too strong at first and this is why Ed asks him to slow down, until Ed can figure out what he's doing about his own guilt/violence/identity/daddy issues (maybe Ed can actually figure out something about his guilt/violence/identity/daddy issues). Maybe Stede's entire conception of romance comes from poetry and novels and it hits a hard skid when he tries it out in reality. Maybe there are cultural clashes between how pirates approach one another and how the landed upper class does it. The exact way Stede fails doesn't really matter, because the point is that Stede is trying something, and fucking it up, and trying again, and growing as he does so, learning more about what the relationship between him and Ed needs and who they are as people.

This also could have been a really interesting arc for Stede internally. Throw in a couple of flashbacks to Stede courting Mary, to make a parallel between how he acted then and how he's acting now with Ed. If it's beyond the budget to fly Claudia O'Doherty to New Zealand or she's busy or something, give Stede a random other lady or two he approached as a young man – ones who obviously refused to accept his hand. Excellent! Now there's even more weight to him getting it right this time with Ed, when he's never managed to get someone to like him before! Or give young Stede an intense friendship with another young man that went wrong, and back then he didn't understand, but now he can look back and be like, 'oh I guess that wasn't as platonic as I thought'. (Personally, this would be my favorite option, but I know Jenkins & co said they didn't want to write a coming-out story, so maybe they'd have been less interested in this one. Fine, but I want it! 🥳 ) I think you could do this without taking up a lot of screentime – I doubt all the scenes we got of Ed's childhood add up to five minutes in total, but we got plenty of information from those three glimpses.

It would also make sense for Stede to discuss the issue with the crew, which gives the show a chance to flesh out their role a little more, another thing the season could have used. If he asks Lucius, what Lucius responds and how he reacts could help to develop the Lucius/Pete relationship. Similarly, if Stede turned to Olu or Jim, we could have heard more about Jim/Archie or Olu/Zheng or any combination of the four. Or any of the crew! What kind of relationship advice does Frenchie give? Roach? This also could have intersected with Ed's redemption arc nicely: which are the crew are willing to put aside their anger at Ed to help Stede (and them doing so would give more credence to Izzy's speech about them being family and loving Ed at the end)? Who isn't willing, and tries to deliberately sabotage their relationship for revenge, and how do Stede and/or Ed react to that?

Overall, I think such an arc could have fit the show's themes of masculinity and toxicity really well. There's so much about dating and pick-up lines and romance that reflects on gender – there are expectations of who should be aggressive vs receptive, flowery vs crude, prudish vs too fast, gifts as a sign of love vs gifts as obligation... it's endless. Obviously the season wouldn't have time to explore all these angles, but I list them as a sign of how many directions they could have taken this topic in. Ultimately it all comes down to: Who does Stede want to be as a partner? And who does Ed want him to be? And that would be so strong as a direction to go in, even if we didn't get final answers to the questions! At least they would be asking them.

But instead we got a vision of a mermaid and never explored who Stede is in reality. :(

[allamericanb-tch]

crimson rivers thoughts !!!

chapter 1

i’m scared

sirius ❤️‍🩹

thank god regulus and james are both going to survive this i don’t know what i would do if either of them died

the katniss and peeta parallels

i love effie. everyone deserves parents like euphemia and fleamont potter. 

sirius isn’t dying either. good.

oh i really hope evan doesn’t die in this i hope he isnt in the arena at all i would die

rip uncle alphard

james deciding that when he needs to he will sacrifice himself to get regulus home I CANT

i love jegulus

chapter 2

omg what if pandora is in this. or mary and lily and marlene and dorcas and— 

i’m not manifesting this.

i hope snape is in the arena bc i want him to die

so pandora is the effie trinket of this? so she lives. thank. god.

sirius telling regulus to be more like james 😭

omg fab and gid

not their suits being in their house colors i love it

ok dorcas isn’t in the arena. good. i love her too much to watch her die.

james looking at regulus i love them i love them i love them

is voldy the game maker?? that’s fitting i guess.

wolfstar?! wolfstar.

“sirius’ heart is racing and he doesn’t know why” sirius. babe.

chapter 3

no thoughts just jegulus

marlene isn’t a tribute!! huzzah

of course lucius mentors the death eaters

frank!!!

james and sirius’ friendship ugh i love james

dorcas!!!

i’m scared of who the other tributes will be

“he knows people only want him just to say that they had him, not for him” tears.

ok mulciber and avery i will not be sad about their deaths. 

pete!! omg is he going to die.

EVAN NO i’m doing to cry when he dies

oh remus and sirius. i love them.

“a beautiful stuttering mess”

they need to kiss

[chuplayswithfire]

i think we all know that episode ten features both Stede and Ed paralleling each other, but what really interests me about the whole thing is that they are moving in reverse from each other, not following the same path but rather tracking backwards.

Ed is at his most emotionally honest and healthy point at the start through about the first half of Episode 10. It might not seem like it on the surface, given the crying, feasting upon of marmalade, depression nesting, and sad poetry writing, but this is Edward Teach for the first time (possibly in his life, but definitely during the season) allowing himself to feel his emotions in the moment without needing to be subject to racist violence or trauma (the French captain using a racial slur, the false kraken) first. Stede broke up with him and instead of putting on a mask until it overwhelms him, he's just sad. He just lets himself be sad, and then he reaches out to other people - Lucius, and then the crew - and he starts to heal.

Is he doing great? Fuck, of course not. The man's just had his heart broken after giving up everything he knows and putting himself out there. He's feeling god awful. He's a wreck. Even when he's cleaning up, and feeling a bit better, it's clear he's still really fucking sad, and clearly his new hopes are fragile considering Izzy will later break them down like a wrecking ball, but in that first half of the episode what we see is Ed suffering and hurt.

And honest about it. No hiding himself. No hiding from himself. He doesn't try to blend in. He doesn't put on a different mask, he doesn't hide away from it. Even without Stede, he's letting himself feel what he wants to feel and react how he wants to react and be the person he wants to be, Edward not just Blackbeard myth and legend. He's acting fully on his personal growth.

Stede on the other hand starts the episode out lying to himself and everyone around him about everything he's feeling. He's regressed to all his worst habits - he's passive aggressive with Mary and avoidant, nosy and invasive, leaning fully into his privilege to dictate to Mary her title (pointing out that Widow Bonnet isn't accurate and that she should change it) and space (being in her painter's studio when she clearly doesn't want him there, and remember, Stede is the one familiar with passive aggression and the rules of society. He knows what he's doing.)

He tries to pretend that everything is normal, giving into his classic trait of avoidance by refusing to properly discuss the issue of his abandoning his family (Mary is the one forced to bring it up! After Stede tries to passive aggressively get her to talk about Doug!) or becoming a criminal or - any of it, really.

And this culminates in two ways: 1) Stede going to that bar and indulging in the worst of himself with those men, betraying Ed for the sake of winning a place amidst men he's never been able to find companionship with and 2) ruining Mary's event with verbal and then physical violence and refusing to discuss THAT either.

for the first - it is difficult to see the way that Stede discusses Ed in that post as anything besides Stede throwing Ed fully under the bus for the sake of his own reputation (and being fully aware of it, which makes him feel worse, which makes him lash out more when he gets to Mary's art show). Stede's been uncomfortable at home, unhappy, has made this choice to rush back and pour himself into a space that's already been filled in and paved over, and it's becoming increasingly clear to him that no matter how much he wants to deny it, he doesn't belong here.

And then along come fellow gentlemen who gas him up, who consider him a hero, who want to hear all about his adventures. He's boasting when we return to the clip, about his duel with Izzy, clearly already deep in his cups given the number of empty tankards around him. When they ask about Blackbeard, leaning in, eager, "Is he as bloodthirsty as everyone says," full of relish and intrigue, Stede responds with truth - "Oh he's absolutely lovely."

And those men falter, their faces struck with confusion, maybe disappointment, and you get a moment of Stede seeing this, that he's losing the crowd, and he says, "Oh and of course a bloodthirsty killer" and immediately there are smiles and impressed nods. This isn't something he said to protect Ed or his reputation - this is something he said to recapture the crowd hanging on his every word, for once listening to him, Stede Bonnet, with respect. No Baby Bonnet here.

Not great Stede!

But then he makes it worse, by adding, "Born of the devil himself."

Born of the devil himself. The ultimate means of othering someone in the Christian world, which, these times were very big on the religion, on the Christianity, on the importance of being children of God, and here is Stede throwing Ed fully under the bus to say that Ed isn't just a bloodthirsty killer, but a monster, a being born from the devil himself.

Stede has personally heard from Ed that these are some of Ed's worst fears about himself. That he's a bad person, a monster, that he's done all these horrible things, and Stede fully throws Ed to that reputation for the sake of getting along with his fellow rich white gentlemen. He is fully putting Ed in the box of the Devil Pyrate Blackbeard for the approval of these men. And he clearly feels pretty bad about it, considering he hastens to say he doesn't want to talk about Ed.

And then we get to his second big hit on his spiral down (and I do love the symbolism, that Stede and Ed both have a two hit spiral down to the bottom). He goes to Mary's art show, drunk as a skunk, to humiliate Mary and make her feel as terrible as he does, because he hates that she's happy.

"And if her husband gave up the sea, surely she should give up the dishonest title, even though she hates my guts. [exaggerated sad face] which is her right."

Oh he can't stand that she's happy. That she gave him that speech and told him she won't blow up her life just because he blew up his (after he blew up hers in the first place!!!)

And then when Doug puts a hand on his shoulder, there's that already classic line - "Unhand me or bleed." - as he tosses him to the table and presses a knife to him. The look of dawning realization.

"Clearly I've had too much to drink. And for that I am sorry. Being home's been quite an adjustment. For both of us! I forgive you by the way. For sleeping with Doug."

This is the lowest Stede can go. This is his bottom drop. This is not an apology for what he said about or to Mary, what he did to Doug. This is an apology for having too much to drink, coupled with a condescending, but we were both in the wrong, equally! Stede doesn't actually face that he's beyond fucked things up until Mary almost kills him and he's forced to come to the realization of ohhhhh shit, she was going to kill me!

Luckily from here, he can make the climb up. And this is partially because Mary is gracious about the whole thing (more than most people would be, to be honest), but also because Stede has a way out. Stede can go back to the sea, and he can go back to his crew, and he can go back to Ed.

He came home, but he can leave again. And he sets things to rights. He talks about his feelings, he speaks to the children and Mary and even Doug, he puts her reputation back to the way it should be and fakes his death and he's able to walk back to a life that he truly wants as a man free of the past.

Now back to Ed.

See, now we're back to that fun reverse parallel. Because in a perfect filming choice, the intersection of Stede and Ed's emotional arcs happens to be the moment when it all hits the crescendo - because Izzy confronts Ed, who is at his best and most free self, at the moment that Stede is torching Mary's life and being his absolutely worse self. And I didn't talk about that scene earlier, but let's talk about it.

Let's talk about Ed is smiling and laughing a little, is cleaning up and restoring the space around him, is giving himself the emotional room to go "Feels nice to tidy up a little, can't believe I was living like this, can you Iz?" and invite a man who has both been his ally and his betrayer in, and Izzy Fucking Hands, lounging in the background, leafing through Stede's book of pirates and anti Blackbeard propaganda, says,

"I'm going to speak plainly." And Ed welcomes this. Ed gives him the space to speak. "I should have let the English kill you." And we see the expression on Ed's face, as his smile drops and his brows furrow. "This, whatever it is you've become, is a fate worse than death."

And Ed tries to laugh it off, a little bitten of tch, shake of the head, close the eyes, and smile again, "Well, I am still, Blackbeard, so -"

And Izzy cuts him off with a growl. Izzy tosses the book. Izzy stomps up to him. Izzy growls out that the English propaganda is the real Blackbeard, not Edward, who's just a "namby-pamby in a silk gown, piiiiining for his boooooyfriend."

And Ed snaps.

Narratively, its the moment when Stede grabs a knife and holds it to Doug's throat.

(Note that they both go for the throat. Constantly paralleling each other.)

From here, while Stede goes on the upswing, Ed goes on the downswing. It's here that he betrays himself and Stede - where Stede tore Ed down to cast him as the monster for the approval of his wealthy white peers, Ed has everything of Stede's cast into the sea, starting with Lucius and then the books and the the knick knacks and finally the crew themselves, save for the ones Ed needs. This is Ed's two part violence - hurting the crew, throwing away Stede's stuff.

(I'm going to be honest, I don't read cutting off Izzy's toe as an act of violence, that seemed very much like an act of acknowledgement for and too Izzy and the man he wants Ed to be, the man he worships. It's a classic Blackbeard thing to do, cut off a man's toe and make him eat it for a laugh, and Izzy wants Blackbeard.)

And Ed has people around him too, people who care about him, but they're Stede's people first. We haven't seen Ed getting close to the crew aside from Lucius and Frenchie - and where Frenchie was validating Ed on the French ship, Lucius has been Stede's staunch partner in romance. It's really clear why one goes and one stays. The person that Ed has who "cares" about Ed, is Izzy, who this whole performance is for.

So we end where we began.

One protagonist at his most emotionally healthy and honest. One protagonist drowning in his worst state to date.

God I fucking love this show.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Ok, Dungeons and Dragons au because I can. And because a mutual asked for their main stats and now im thinking thoughts. They've all got the pirate background unless stated otherwise. I'm also only going to give Buttons a race but I imagine that porting them into D&D would make them elves and halflings and the like.

So there's like a few parties going on here. There's Ed's original Adventuring party which has since split up:

Ed: Warlock, fathomless pact, pirate background, Level 17, Str: 11 Dex: 14 Con: 15 Int: 20 Wis: 19 Cha: 20; strong focus in illusion spells, his patron, the Kraken has protected him at pivotal moments but overall their relationship is antagonistic.

Jack: Rogue, Swashbuckler archetype, level 17, Str: 13 Dex: 17 Con: 18 Int: 8 Wis: 15 Cha: 20, Whip is his main weapon and he's not like other swashbucklers tm

Anne: Rogue, Assassin archetype, Noble background (fight me about it), level 17, Str: 8; Dex: 20; Con: 14; Int: 14; Wis: 12; Cha: 17

Mary: Fighter, Champion because it's the best one, Level 17, Str: 20, Dex: 13, Con: 16, Int: 12, Wis: 15, Cha: 9

Fang: Ranger, Beastmaster archetype (I'm sorry from the perspective that it is the worst ranger subclass but yay puppy), Level 17, Str: 20, Dex: 11, Con: 15, Int: 13, Wis: 20, Cha: 13, used to have a dog but it died and it was Eds fault that it died. Now his animal companion is a goat. The goat drinks rum.

---

And then there's the revenge crew who is yet another group, they used standard array and get a racial +2/+1 for my convenience:

Jim: Rogue, Assassin archetype, probably some homebrew raised in a cult background that I can't believe they haven't put out yet, or maybe haunted one but that seems wrong, Level 5, Str: 8; Dex: 17; Con: 14; Int: 13; Wis: 13; Cha: 10.

Olu: Paladin, oath of devotion, pirate also seems wrong for him but idk; Level 5: Str: 14; Dex: 10; Con: 13; Int: 11; Wis: 12; Cha: 15, the oath is of devotion to his family which is Jim xoxo.

Lucius: Eloquence Bard, guild artisan background which lists scribes; Level 5; Str: 8; Dex: 12; Con: 10; Int: 15; Wis: 13; Cha: 17

Pete: Fighter, not sure what subclass open to suggestions, Level 5; Str: 16; Dex: 13; Con: 16; Int: 12; Wis: 10; Cha: 8

Frenchie: Artificer (I feel like a homebrew subclass or alchemist), Entertainer background, Level 5; Str: 8; Dex: 10; Con: 12; Int: 17; Wis: 13; Cha: 15

Wee John: Eldritch Knight fighter, level 5; Str: 17; Dex: 8; Con: 12; Int: 14; Wis: 10; Cha: 14; The DM is letting him take a bunch of evocation spells because the base rules for this subclass are dumb as fuck (i know the spells are school locked i just dont remember to which two schools) he will be able to cast fire ball by 13th level. Let Eldritch Knight and Arcane trickster take whatever spells they want 2k24 rogues don't need to be more invisible they do need to be able to cast identify.

Roach: life cleric, level 5; Str: 8; Dex: 13; Con: 15; Int: 12; Wis: 17; Cha: 10; his god is a homebrew deity who is the patron of all things that refuse to die and its holiest creature is the humble cockroach and once they entered the temple and the dm pulled up a gospel cover of I'm a Survivor by destiny's child for background music.

Buttons: Druid, Circle of the Moon, Hermit Background, Hexblood lineage, level 5; Str: 12; Dex: 11; Con: 14; Int: 13; Wis: 17; Cha: 8

Swede: Bard, College of Glamor (mostly because I'm still not convinced his name wasn't stolen by the fey), level 5; Str: 13; Dex: 12; Con: 16; Int: 8; Wis: 10; Cha: 16

Archie: Barbarian, zealot, same background as Jim but a different cult, level (whatever they're at by season 2); Str: 14; Dex: 13; Con: 17; Int: 8; Wis: 10; Cha: 13 (plus an ASI presumably which would go into strength); Archie and Ivan have the same Player that's why Ivan died. Very sad. Oh well there's other fighters.

---

Miscellaneous

Zheng: Bard, College of Eloquence or College of swords, Level 17; Str: 9; Dex: 20; Con: 14; Int: 17; Wis: 12; Cha: 20; alternatively? Hexblade Warlock (to parallel Ed) and Auntie is the sword. Same stats if true

Spanish Jackie: Mastermind Rogue, criminal background (it's like a pirate background but less boat oriented), Level 15; Str: 10; Dex: 18; Con: 13; Int: 20; Wis: 15; Cha: 18; retired adventurer who owns a bar that the party doesn't find out has levels until they fuck around and find out in her bar

Ivan: Fighter, Champion, Level 10; Str: 19; Dex: 10; Con: 16; Int: 10; Wis: 12; Cha: 13; player got board of playing a fighter and didn't really flesh him out :(

Izzy: Fighter, Champion, Soldier background (no water vehicle proficiency), Level 3 (he has not leveled up in 8 years, very sad); Str: 15 ; Dex: 14 ; Con: 6; Int: 8; Wis: 5; Cha: 6; I actually rolled this one up. 3d6 no rerolls, no dice box, and if it falls on the floor it's a one. Believe it or not this is after the +2/+1 to any stat. Anyway I'm an Izzy apologist now. Yes he did awful things but truly how can we blame the little guy when his charisma modifier is a -2 and his wisdom modifier is a -3. He had no idea what was going on and he couldn't talk his way out of a wet paper bag.

Stede: Barbarian, path of wild magic, Noble background, level 2 (wow, he's only been adventuring for a few weeks and he's already leveled up!); Str: 17; Dex: 8; Con: 15; Int: 16; Wis: 11; Cha: 10; I also rolled this stat array but this time 4d6 drop lowest. Also he's taking the lucky feat as his first feat. Whether that's at level one because he's human or at level 4 because he's something else is up to interpretation.

[sarucane]

OFMD Meta Series Master Thread

My brain works in meta series for some reason, and a couple of my individual metas have been really popular! So in case you're looking for more of my stuff, or to read a meta related to one you already liked, here're my series. I'll update them as I go.

Metas about Stories and Storytelling in OFMD

Do we just keep telling the same story forever? Meta on OFMD S1E7 "This is Happening"

(Note: writing this while on a holiday, there'll be more metas in this series once I get home and go through drafts ;) )

The Fuckery's the Thing: Finding truth through lies in "The Art of Fuckery"

True Stories, False Stories: "The Best Revenge is Dressing Well"

Stories within Stories (within more stories!): OFMD Meta Analysis of Ep 1 E4

Stede Bonnet's Stories (S2)

Ed Teach's Stories

Stede Bonnet's Stories (S1)

Storytelling in Our Flag Means Death

Character Analysis Question Metas

Why was finding Stede's letter so important for Ed?

Why did Ed think becoming a fisherman made any sense at all?

Why did Ed throw away his leathers?

Why did Ed want to "take it slow"?

Why didn't Izzy shoot Ed (then)?

Why did Ed headbutt Stede?

Why didn't Ed always protect Stede?

How did Stede leave pirating so easily?

Did Ed really want to die?

How did Stede know that Ed wanted to "watch the world burn"?

Why did Ed shoot Izzy then?

Spiral Parallels: The second season of OFMD references the first a lot, generally in ways that add a lot to the emotional depth of an original scene. Here's a heap of metas about that because I think it's cool.

53: Ed's Suicidal Spiral (S1E10, S2E1-3)

52: Weddings (S1E4/10, S1E1/2/8)

51: Pinocchio (S1E1, S2E1/8)

50: Beards and Unconditional Love

49: Whims, Self-Knowledge, and Commitment

48: Lessons of Episodes 5 (S1E4/5 & S2E5)

47: What would Jeff do? (S1E5 & S2E3/6/8)

46: Izzy Being Wrong Part 4--Izzy's redemption (in which he learns to be right) (S1E10-S2)

45: Izzy Being Wrong 3 (S1E6-9)

44: Izzy Being Wrong 2 (S1E5)

43: Stede's Fantasies Creating Reality (S1E1/3/8, S2E1/3/4/8)

42: Sandy Beards and Self-Hatred (S1E8 & S2E3)

41: Izzy and the Queer Community of the Revenge (S1E5 & S2E6)

40: Izzy Being Wrong Part 1 (S1E2-4 & S02E8)

39: Wearing Fine Things Well (S01E05 & S02E05)

38: Mad Devil Blackbeard (S01E04/10, S02E01/02)

37: Ed and Izzy in Those Scenes 2 (S01E10 & S02E08)

36: Ed and Izzy in Those Scenes 1 (S01E10 & S02E08)

35: Lighthouses (S01E04/10 &S02E06/08)

34: Manipulative Pirate Buddies 5 (S01E08 & S02E04)

33: Manipulative Pirate Buddies 4 (S01E08 & S02E04)

32: Manipulative Pirate Buddies 3 (S01E08 & S02E04)

31: Manipulative Pirate Buddies 2 (S01E08 & S02E04)

30: Manipulative Pirate Buddies 1 (S01E08 & S02E04)

29: Silk Robes and Ed's Self-Identity (S01E10 & S02E07

28: Izzy and Stede Talk Blackbeard (S01E06 & S02E03)

27: Ed's Despair (S01E10 & S02E02)

26: A Fall into Dark Water (S01E10 & S02E03)

25: Mary and Stede, Stede and Ed (S01E10 & S02E08)

24: The Character Development of a Belly Flop (S01E01 & S02E03)

23: Stede's Duels (S01E06 & S02E07)

22: Ed Leaves Stede (S01E08 & S2E07)

21: Executions of Stede Bonnet and Ned Lowe (S01E09 & S02E06)

20: Lucius and Pete (S01E6 & S02E05)

19: Ed and Izzy Sing (S01E10 & S02E06)

18: Izzy's Interventions (S01E06 & S02E01)

17: Stages of Intimacy (S01E06 & S02E06)

16: Poison and Positivity (S01E06 & S02E06)

15: The Kraken (S01E06 & S02E08)

14: Party Time 4 (S01E05 & S02E07)

13: Party Time Part 3 (S01E05 & S02E07)

12: Party Time 2 (S01E05 & S02E07)

11: Party Time Part 1 (S01E05 & S02E07)

10: Attention Crew of the Revenge, may I present… (S01E04 & S02E05)

9: Breakroom Chats (S01E04 & S02E06)

8: Ed, Izzy, and the Death of Blackbeard (S01E04 & S02E02)

7: Blackbeard and his First Mate (S01E03 & S02E01)

6: Cowards (S01E04 & S02E07)

5: The Unicorn (S01E04, S01E08, S02E04, S02E08)

4: Stede's Letters (S01E04 & S02E08)

3: Rise and Shine, Pirate (S01E04 & S02E04)

2: Stede's Grand Entrance (S01E03 & S02E08)

On the Spiral Narrative of OFMD 1: Pirates and Mermen (S01E03 & S02E03)

[douwatahima]

Oooookay. So I finished my seventh watch through of season 2 yesterday and I finally feel equipped to give my personal ranking of all 18 OFMD episodes. No one asked for this but here it is lol. Also I gave them all a score out of ten and tiered them all by said score because I'm very normal. LET'S GO.

6/10 - These Are Kinda Meh

18. 1x02: A Damned Man - To me, this is the most forgettable episode of the whole show. I mean, it's not awful or anything (it's still OFMD), but I have literally nothing to say about it. It's just kinda there.

17. 2x06: Calypso's Birthday - There's things in this episode I like (everything with Ned Lowe is good imo), but the whole party sequence, which takes up about half the episode, feels so empty to me. At first it didn't bother me that much, but then Samba revealed what the original plan was and knowing that at one point this episode had a plot has made the incredible lack of one we got soooo much more noticeable.

16. 1x03: The Gentleman Pirate - Introduction of Spanish Jackie, Magic Man, Ed and Stede meeting for the first time, there's definitely good stuff here. However, it gets sooooooooo much better than this.

7/10 - Good and Fun, Just Not My Fave

15. 2x07: Man on Fire - There is so much in this episode I like. Ed and Stede having breakfast in bed makes me feel insane. Stede and Zheng fighting ruled so hard. FRENCHIE SCHEMEING WITH THE CREW!!! The biggest thing is that there's so much in this episode that nothing really gets room to breathe. With like…five more minutes this episode could've been peak.

14. 1x06: The Art of Fuckery - This falls under the category of "episodes that are good, but there are others I like way more". The bathtub scene is of course peak, but in a season with some really incredible stuff this episode doesn't particularly stick out to me.

13. 2x04: Fun and Games - Same as the previous episode. I love the whole "Seabird" sequence, Ed and Stede's little heart to heart, and of course Anne and Mary's everything, but there are so many more episodes I love way more.

8/10 - I'm Incredibly Fond of These

12. 1x07: This is Happening - Fun fact I originally had this in the last category but then I remembered the co-captains scene and I knew I had to bump it up lmao. There's soooo much peak OFMD in here. The snake scene! Lucius calling Ed out!!! The previously mentioned co-captains scene!!!!! The only reason this isn't higher is because around my…fifteenth rewatch I found myself kinda getting bored with the Jim's nana subplot (sorry Jim).

11. 1x01: Pilot - OHHHHH I AM SO FOND OF THE PILOT. There's definitely some clunkiness in this episode imo (it is the first one after all), but the feeling I get when I boot up this episode is unparalleled. Frenchie starts singing and my heart soars. Also the entire "High on a Rocky Ledge" sequence is beautiful even all these months later.

10. 1x08: We Gull Way Back - 90% of my love for this episode is that I find Will Arnett very funny. This episode also gave us "The Chain" sequence including the foot touch heard around the world. ALSO ROOM PEOPLE!!! I love this one.

09. 2x01: Impossible Birds - The biggest fault of this episode is that it premiered alongside two of the best episodes of OFMD ever and this one slightly pales in comparison. That being said, it's a very strong season opener. Also, I am personally obsessed with the "Strawberry Letter 23" sequence. AND THE CAKE TOPPERS I CAN'T BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT THE CAKE TOPPERS!!!!!

08. 1x04: Discomfort in a Married State - I AM SOOOOOO FOND OF THIS ONE. The way the first half of the episode parallels Ed/Izzy and Stede/Mary only to spend the second half juxtaposing those two relationships against Ed/Stede? Masterful. The way Ed and Stede's relationship develops so naturally? Beautiful. THE LIGHTHOUSE SCENE? INCREDIBLE. WHAT AN EPISODE!

9/10 - I'm Genuinely Mad These Didn't Make Top 5

07. 2x05: The Curse of the Seafaring Life - The way this episode had me giggling and kicking my feet in real life after I first saw it. There's nothing not to like here. Ed and Fang fishing, Lucius and Pete getting engaged, THE SUIT…all incredible. Not to mention we got "you wear fine things well" version 2.0 with the best kiss in the whole show!

06. 1x05: The Best Revenge is Dressing Well - I love everything about this one. Ed and Stede at the fancy party, Lucius kicking Izzy's ass with the power of polyamory, Frenchie and Olu scamming racists…when I think of quintessential OFMD, this is the episode I think of. And of course the original version of "you wear fine things well" lives within my very soul.

10/10 - I Feel Mentally Ill About These Ones

05. 2x02: Red Flags - To start off, I really liked getting Lucius back and his whole subplot with Stede was really really great. Now that that point's out of the way HOLY SHIT EVERYTHING WITH ED IN THIS EPISODE WHAT THE FUCK. THE SCENE BETWEEN ED AND IZZY IS LITERALLY GOD TIER. ED PAINTED THE BRIDE TO LOOK LIKE HIMSELF AND I STILL HAVEN'T RECOVERED. "RUN FROM ME"? LIKE...IN GENERAL??? CRAZY. AND THEN ED SAYING "FINALLY" WHEN HE GETS THE CREW TO KILL HIM? INSANE. THEY WERE INSANE FOR THIS.

04. 1x09: Act of Grace - I mean, listen. I've talked about this a lot but it bears repeating. Staying up until 2am to watch this episode when it premiered and seeing Ed and Stede ACTUALLY KISS changed me as a person. I am different because I experienced that. Not to mention the rest of this episode is peak. Ed calling for the act of grace, the crew voting Olu as captain, the entire "Perfect Day" sequence, just incredible all around.

03. 2x08: Mermen - God this show can do a good finale. I will never stop being bowled over by how much I love this one. The "Moscow" scene? Sexy as hell. Ed and Stede reuniting and Ed telling Stede he loves him? I've watched it three thousand times. THE LETTER? THEY WROTE THEIR NAMES ON EACH OTHER IN PERMANENT INK!!! Also, even though it's highly controversial to say, I thought Izzy's death scene was very very good. Not to mention the entire last few minutes set to "The Times They Are A-Changin'" makes me feel so incredibly soft. I love OFMD soooooo much.

02. 2x03: The Innkeeper - Listen. If this whole episode sucked but it still included the mermaid scene I would still have it this high. That being said, this whole episode is sooooo incredibly good. The opening sequence with Zheng manipulating the rival captain is so well done. Ed in the gravy basket is crazy from beginning to end. Stede plotting to get the crew to safety is peak Stede and I love it. And somehow, after all of that, the episode also ends with one of the most incredible sequences I have ever seen. Watching a man who thought he was fundamentally unlovable get brought back to life because of how much he's loved while "This Woman's Work" plays in the background will follow me forever. Just…some of the most beautiful shit ever put to film.

1000/10 - THE GOAT NO OTHER NEED APPLY

01. 1x10: Wherever You Go, There You Are - I AM SO SERIOUS WHEN I SAY THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVOURITE EPISODES OF TELEVISION OF ALL TIME. The way Ed and Stede's plots through this episode are juxtaposed against each other makes me feel feral. The way that Stede is so out of place and closed off from his family while Ed is actively healing and bonding with the crew ONLY FOR THESE TWO PLOTS TO FLIP WHEN THEY EACH TALK TO THE PERSON WHO REPRESENTED A NONFUNCTIONING RELATIONSHIP TO THEM ALL THE WAY BACK IN EPISODE FOUR! THE WAY MARY AND STEDE GETTING TO TALK AND BE HONEST AND LET EACH OTHER GO ALLOWS STEDE TO FINALLY GROW AND BE HAPPY WHILE IZZY HANGING ON TO THAT TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH ALL OF HIS MIGHT AND NOT LETTING ED GROW AND CHANGE WITHOUT HIM FORCES ED BACK INTO THE PITS OF DESPAIR!!! The entire "Avalanche" sequence breaks my heart in the absolute best way and seeing Ed do all this terrible shit with no more spark left in his usually super expressive eyes hurts so good! And then, of course, there's my favourite part of all. Seeing Stede, a man who has been so lost and unmoored, row out into the ocean looking more settled than we've ever seen him while Mary says he's now free and that freedom coming completely from Stede realizing he's in love with another man is something that feels so personally assuring to me I can't even fully express it. The entire "Miles from Nowhere" sequence is incredible to me (and to this day that song is thee OFMD needle drop in my opinion) but that part especially is my favourite thing this show has ever given me hands down. Thank you David Jenkins for my life.

[abjasblog]

Okay but like,

Up until the end of e6, Stede is the guy who TALKS his way out of stuff. That's who he is. He even does it IN e6, and seems very proud of himself. That's what got him noticed and seen and loved by his crew who even start to talk things through amongst themselves. Even fucking IZZY is doing it.

He talks to Ed and Lucius and Mary and he writes letters and even asks the Swede before stealing from Spanish Jackie. He ALWAYS (eventually) talks until he has no option but to, for example, organise a prison escape and steal a steering wheel.

But from the end of e6 and throughout e7, he chooses NOT to do that. He chooses physical acts every time. Even with Ed. Even when he's given an out, he doubles down.

And I think this really says something about how he is paralleling Ed this season. Ed is trying to get back to himself, the person he is without the poison. Meanwhile, Stede who has always been unapologetically himself, is trying to be something else.

Why? We don't quite know yet. But honestly I think we're gonna see Stede get lower, even lower than he was in ep1. I think we're going to see Stede stripped to nothing, with no one and have to choose the man he is and build himself up to that.

Personally? I wanna see him go to the gravyboat and get a serious talking to from Buttons. But that's just me 🤷‍♀️

[dracothelizard]

HAPPY OFMD BIG BANG ANNIVERSARY TO MY FIC!

Last year, I signed up for @ofmdbigbang and wrote a 60K Lovecraftian AU. @tealtumbleweed has a masterpost for their art, btw, it's great.

We got the 30th of September 2022 as a posting date, making today the one-year anniversary!

Title: Luctor et Emergo: The Call of Edthulhu (I added 'the' to Call of Edthulhu later on to make it fit better with The Vacation of Edthulhu)

Pairings: Stede/Edthulhu, background Lucius/Pete, background Jim/Oluwande

Summary: Stede pulled a face at that. “Hm, well, I don’t want to do any human sacrifices.”

“Kinda rule number one of being in a cult,” Pete scoffed.

“Ah! Not in this cult!” Stede beamed at him and looked around expectantly. “Remember? What’s our number one rule?”

Roach raised his hand. “Don’t sacrifice my chicken.”

“Not quite number one, but still high up,” Stede replied. “Swede?”

“Stick to the chore schedule?”

“Definitely in the top ten.” There were no more hands, and he sighed. “Come on! If we want to get a good result, we talk about it…”

“As a cult,” the others chorused, some more reluctant than others.

AKA the Lovecraftian AU no one asked for!

In which High Priest Stede struggles with nosy Badmintons, his cultists and the Spanish Inquisition. Meeting Edthulhu makes everything better. Now Stede just has to help the eldritch deity emerge fully into this world. It'll be fine! Probably!

And also, obviously there is tentacle sex ;)

Read on if you want a bit more background/knowledge humankind was not meant to know ooooh AKA slight spoilers for my fic

My initial big bang idea was a canon divergence for ep 8, where Stede and Oluwande would bond over being left behind and the crew would drag them on a terrible pubcrawl to cheer them up. They'd run into Ed and Jim, and obviously there'd be shenanigans. It's still in my WIPs somewhere.

But I got involved in a discussion about Stede as a Lovecraftian cultist to eldritch Ed, and I've played a lot of Call of Cthulhu, a TTRPG. So I thought, oh, maybe Stede and his crew as terrible investigators going after Edthulhu's cult led by High Priest Izzy!

But then I realised that no, the original idea was right. Stede and his crew as terrible cultists vs High Priest Izzy who is very dedicated to Edthulhu.

Outlining and plotting involved going over s1 to see which bits I wanted to take, and how to set them up properly so they'd still work.

I still wanted Stede to have similar character beats to canon, so he gets some growing confidence after besting Izzy before meeting Edthulhu, then grows overconfident when making deals at Spanish Jackie'z and requires Edthulhu to rescue him. Figuring out WTF to do with the hostage plotpoint was fun :p.

Also, spoilers, the Spanish Inquisition turns up (NOBODY EXPECTS THEM!!). But I actually kind of forgot about them while outlining. I thought, okay, I need the deal at Jackie'z to go badly. I need a group of people who can attack cultists, so there's some witchhunting/religious persecuting going on, and I'd like them to be Spanish to go with canon.

So I googled something like 'Spanish witchhunt' and my first result was Spanish Inquisition and I felt really dumb for having forgotten them.

Once Stede and Edthulhu meet, there aren't as many parallels because I had to get them to Atlantis and raise Edthulhu, but obviously Stede and Edthulhu have cute moments, Stede rescues Edthulhu, Jackstur turns up, and Mary and Doug are surprisingly okay with everything!

And then everyone gets to find happiness, including Izzy!

My main takeaway for this year's Big Bang was that I had to plan my writing better, as I was still writing close to my deadline, and that I had to aim for something shorter. And for this year, I succeeded at both those goals!

[knowlesian]

ofmd meta masterpost

because somehow i have written... a lot of it!

categories under the jump, etc.

character-specific

stede in the finale, from stede’s perspective ( part one and part two )

izzy in the finale, from izzy’s perspective ( x )

ed in the finale, from ed’s perspective ( x )

the lighthouse and the kraken as metaphors for expected performances of masculinity ( x )

stede and trauma responses ( x )

izzy and masculinity and sunk cost fallacy + why lucius and stede irk him so much  ( x )

ed/blackbeard and masks we make real because we wear them ( x )

izzy sucks and it’s sad because sometimes we suck and it’s sad: a case for why he exists in the narrative and is Like This ( x )

stede and fear of opening up ( x )

ed as jeff and why that funny joke is a sad character beat too ( x )

izzy and toxic caretaking ( x )

ed and playing the game when you feel like you can’t do anything else ( x )

ed and the white world + lucius and homophobia ( x )

ed and “farewell, bonnet’s playthings” ( x )

izzy hands buys all his own trouble and stede broke his world, and i just think it’s funny ( x )

stede thinks he deserves to be punished ( x )

frenchie the thematic codeswitcher ( x )

izzy and a redemption arc ( x )

yelling about stede and why i love him/he makes me sad ( x )

stede and a life of zero positive reinforcement ( x )

ed during the duel ( x )

jim and slapping the stupid little cup ( x )

izzy and the dick clouds ( x )

izzy the unreliable narrator ( x )

frenchie and ed and the spoons ( x )

ed and power dynamics ( x )

stede and little kid comparisons/joy ( x )

lucius and being the Gay Best Friend or a gay best friend ( x )

ed and boredom in e4 ( x )

does izzy know ed doesn’t kill? (the evidence says nope.) ( x )

the use of olu as a nickname (aka it’s okay and real people do it too) ( x )

relationship specific

ofmd and mutual + stede and mary in the finale musings ( x )

why ed and stede are simultaneously both sides of one of my favorite ship tropes ( x )

ed and stede putting each other on pedestals ( x )

jim/olu (rough cuts) e7 thoughts ( x )

ed and stede, throwing away their hearts ( x )

jim and olu: this is my beloved, and this is my friend ( x )

ed and izzy’s dynamic makes me crazy, the short version ( x )

proof the moment i met ed and stede i went insane ( x )

they. KNOCKED? BOOTS!!! ( x )

things i would want for the blackbonnet reconciliation moment in s2 ( x )

ed and stede and the finale and making Understandably Poor Choices ( x )

ed and lucius break my heart: the short version ( x )

ed and stede and forgiveness ft neruda ( x )

ed and stede: what do we mean when we say forgiveness? ( x )

why it’s gorgeous/perfect stede can’t pay anybody in s2 ( x )

olu and jim at the end of e4 is going to kill me news at eleven ( x )

episode specific 

stede-ed-izzy finale parallels ( x )

the duel is Very Funny (and secretly a sex scene) ( x )

e7 and mi media naranja ( x )

analyzing the closet scene in e4 ( x )

the use of ‘wherever you go, there you are’ ( x )

drowning the books in the finale ( x )

quick thoughts on the toe scene and catholic imagery ( x )

ofmd and new money via the party in e5 ( x )

general show analysis

consider the humble (and made up!) silk moth ( x )

muppets, moths, and metaphors ( x )

ofmd and how it uses sexuality ( x )

ofmd and how they handle the unhappiness of their most privileged characters ( x )

ofmd Just Gets Humans ( x )

ofmd and toxic relationships ( x )

ofmd and mutual need ( x ) 

ofmd and class/wealth 1.0  ( x )

ofmd and class/wealth 2.0 ( x ) 

the use of revenge on a thematic level ( x )

muppets as a metaphor for marginalization ( x )

ofmd and the rule of ‘nobody thinks they’re the villain’ ( x )

ofmd and intersectionality ( x )

muppets/piracy as a metaphor for queerness ( x )

ofmd is Doing Romance Different ( x )

considering the humble lighthouse ( x )

omfd and balancing character/plot with themes ( x )

ofmd and finding your people/joy (aka, we should all be olu) ( x )

ofmd and revenge vs redemption fantasy ( x )

ofmd and empathy + the world’s endless demand for compassion from marginalized groups ( x )

ofmd and textured writing ( x )

ofmd is emotionally realistic (and gloriously illogical) ( x )

joke analysis

why frenchie’s joke about crystals is The Perfect Joke ( x )

half-oranges and subtext pith helmets: my second favorite joke ( x )

explainers/the more serious stuff

snippet from an academic paper on hawai’i and the after-effects of colonization ( x ) 

a link to the paper itself ( x )

ofmd and climate racism ( x )

ofmd and nuns v priests in catholic culture ( x )

yes, ed is māori (and why it matters) ( x )

yes, ed is māori (and why it matters) ( v personal reflections ) ( x )

olu and frenchie’s names and the commentary they provide on the history of enslavement ( x )

enslavement and show stede v real stede (and why i prefer to keep them separate) ( x )

izzy’s white, ed’s not: we can’t ignore it. ( x )

tapping my ‘we can’t be raceblind when izzy’ sign ( x )

izzy and ed and erasure ( x )

clarifying enslavement required more than just active enslavers and those groups share culpability, and that canon subtly argues stede’s money is from enslavement regardless of their change on degrees of remove ( x )

my meta co-starring or started by other people’s meta!

lighthouse and kraken as metaphors for stede and ed’s expected performances of masculinity ( 2.0 ) ( x )

ed and his moral line on killing ( 2.0 ) ( x )

stede and trauma + ed and wealth ( x )

izzy and toxic caretaking ( 2.0 ) ( x )

why the duel is fucking hilarious (and about fucking) ( 2.0 ) ( x )

consider the lighthouse + ocean vuong quote and context! ( x )

izzy hands: homophobia by any other name is still homophobia ( x )

toxic caretaking 2.0 ( x )

bits and bobs: aka i cannot decide where else this goes

ofmd/the gd moth/how we process history ( x )

spiraling in realtime when i realized they made up the moth ( x )

empathy and accountability because Us Humans Are Weird ( x )

THE MOTH IS A LIE ( x )

ed and the white world ( x )

gdi they made a montezuma’s revenge joke this fuckin team ( x )

liminal space ship is my fetch ( x )

ofmd and violence as a tool ( x )

ofmd is about decolonization and asks us to decolonize ourselves by colonizing the colonizer: my dot over the i ( x )

ofmd and Message Media v media with a message ( x )

found family in ofmd when you throw nana and mary in the thematic mix ( x )

ofmd and on-purpose accidental racism (vs tv’s usually just accidental accidental racism) ( x )

“knives are knives, meat’s meat” is a very good line so i yelled incoherently about it ( x )

holy fuCK i like my toes on my feet holy fuck: the power of image/expectation ( x )

ed the anxious entertainer is something that can be so personal ( x )

weird random shit that doesn’t quite fit anywhere else

transcription of izzy’s drunken bar rant ( x )

olu says cake better than anyone has ever said cake ( x )

the call to muppet’s inception ( x )

the exact moment i saw The Boots ( x )

stede and ed shifting from delicate (taylor) mode into delicate (damien) mode is PEAK ANGST MOMENTS ( x )

frenchie and the sign of the cross ( x )

diverse rooms make better stories ( x )

izzy is easiest because i hate him (affectionate/disgusted) ( x )

can buttons talk to seagulls ( x )

who would win in a fight: doug or the swede ( x )

things i want from izzy’s backstory ( x )

ofmd and the good place are that solidarity hands clasped meme ( x )

ofmd hits extra hard on may day ( x )

this show fucking loves layers ( x )

ofmd loves sexual stabbing ( pls sing that to the tune of sexual healing ) ( x )

stede’s endless lack of gaf when izzy is amazing ( x )

jim cleaver in one hand, drink in the other is perfection ( x )

haiku bot??????

stede bonnet is the elle woods of piracy: or, i shall never top this post ( x )

[im-just-so-so]

So apparently there are 'fans' out there who are fucking rude to other fans. Like, saying people who ship and/or like Ed/Izzy are dumb because they're a parallel to Mary and Stede, meaning they're doomed. Basically they're being assholes. This led to me, angry, because for fuck's sake, let people write and ship what they want! Shipping oftentimes has nothing to do with canon anyways, that's the beauty of fanfiction and fanart. And then my brain gave me the wonderful idea of a Mary/Stede/Doug threesome that eventually has the endgame of Stede/Ed/Izzy, and I just think those 'fans' would really appreciate that.

(ngl, me and @natilieal pretty much outlined the whole thing, there is a very good chance this will one day be written. It includes epiphanies for both Doug and Stede, Stede going to sea to be gay, Mary becoming instant besties with the whole crew, established Ed/Stede, Mary and Lucius scheming to get Ed/Stede/Izzy together, There Was Only One Room, There Was Only One Bed, and of course a happy ending for all)

[queen-anne-music]

ok no. i'm not done.

firstly, from a meta standpoint of izzy's death representing the dying age of piracy, I can kinda get it.

BUT, hear me out

we didn't need that parallel, we got slapped in the face with it in episode 7 when ALMOST ALL OF THE SHIPS BLEW UP, that was representative of the "death of piracy"

additionally, the same meta-commentary could be made by saying that ed's retirement means blackbeard's death and again we get the death of piracy thing from a narrative standpoint

now by this point it is probably VERY obvious that izzy became one of my favorite characters this season, and I have to acknowledge that some of that is definitely clouding my view of this finale

but

i really, really think that this could have been handled better, don't get me wrong Con O'Neill's acting in his final scene was amazing, and I am so, so happy that izzy and ed finally talked about their relationship with each other, but this show has had crazier things happen then a character surviving things that should have killed them, off the top of my head: ed surviving this season, stede surviving being hanged, auntie surviving a whole explosion, buttons TURNING INTO A BIRD, and of course I think there is something to be said for izzy having a leg amputated!! and somehow not getting any kind of infection from that despite the less-than-ideal circumstances

while i don't think that David Jenkins intentions were to say a big fuck you to older disabled members of the lgbtqia community, this still hurts

also seeing time and time again a character go through a redemption arc only to be killed off at the end of it just gets old

but i have to wonder

maybe this isn't meant to be the end of izzy

here's what I think, recall the ending of season 1 where ed throws lucius off the boat and we were all like HE BETTER NOT BE DEAD, I have to wonder if this is meant to parallel that

i'm not trying to pull a tjlc here, but here's a few other things that don't quite add up that support this theory

firstly, the title of the episode. perhaps I'm looking in all the wrong places but I haven't really seen anyone discuss this? the title of each episode usually plays into the events of the episode in some way (sometimes in obvious ways like calypso's birthday and sometimes in less obvious ways like impossible birds) but I can't really see the connection here? its an obvious callback to stede's mermaid scene but it never really came up in the episode which seems a bit odd

next, izzy was buried on land, this feels wrong for so many reasons (yes I know half the time pirates were buried on land shush), there feels like no good reason to bury him on land, something could be said for the fact that he's watching over ed and stede's inn but for someone who represented the pirate ideal I would have thought they would bury him at sea, which leads me to my next point

buttons landed on izzy's grave again i repeat BUTTONS LANDED ON IZZY'S GRAVE the same buttons who turned himself into a BIRD, magic is canonical to the OFMD universe, and it has been established that buttons is an actual sea witch, they didn't do much to establish the limitations of these powers so it would not be out of the question for buttons to potentially bring izzy back, which maybe he can only do if he has access to izzy's body?

i feel the need to also mention that from a narrative standpoint ed and stede's ending feels a little bit rushed (this could be for a lot of other reasons that have nothing to do with this theory I'm not in denial nooooooooo) but it did feel a little bit interesting that we got the whole scene with ed trying (and failing) to be a fisherman contrasted with the ending of him as an innkeeper to say nothing of stede's love of being a pirate captain (and subsequently leaving all of his crew behind) also there was one other scene that make me think that this doesn't feel quite right, the anne and mary dialogue. while I do understand that it was an interesting look into how their relationship turned sour because they both sucked at communication I have to wonder if it is foreshadowing the downfall of ed and stede's relationship now that they've left piracy? again I'm very happy that they seem to be able to communicate a bit better this season, and that they are happy living what ed would call the simple life, but I'm not confident that this ending means smooth sailing for them

(it also seems a bit odd that ed isn't on the ship to take revenge on ricky? but maybe he needed some time to process?)

i think a solid case could be made to bring izzy back in season 3 if we get one (but they also say denial isn't just a river in egypt and I don't wanna give anyone any false hope)

at any rate they certainly have given the fandom quite a bit of stuff to play with for fix-it fics

[lord-of-the-ducks]

Ok but everyone collectively having a Dracula book club is perfectly timed because I literally just started coming up with a Dracula AU for Our Flag Means Death yesterday for reasons completely unrelated to Dracula daily. I was a little worried that I’d be the only one who actually has any interest in that sort of thing, but I guess I’m very wrong lol

Anyway, so here’s a basic outline of what I’ve got so far. If anyone wants to run with this and write their own fanfics or something, go ahead, just tag me so that I can read the hell out of it

Blackbeard as Dracula because if you really think about it, their characters are EXTREMELY similar. In some of the more humanizing moments, Dracula laments that even if he knows how to speak English, that doesn’t mean that he’d actually fit in London, and that he’d still stick out like a sore thumb. Pretty much exactly like Blackbeard’s desire to fit in with the nobles in episode 5. Dracula isn’t even a name, it’s an epithet, and so you bet your ass I’m gonna run with the parallels to the Blackbeard title

Stede as Jonathan because they’re both chronic dumbasses who have no idea what they’re doing and completely disregard the red flags that everyone around them have been begging them to look at. Also because it is my firm belief that Jonathan and Dracula should have kissed.

Mary as Mina. I love Mina Harker and don’t want to just dismiss her as “the female love interest”, and I think that Jonathan and Mina have a very sweet relationship, but in a theoretical Dracula AU fit, Mary makes the most sense as “woman who doesn’t hear from her fiancé for months before he finally gets found in a hospital in Budapest with PTSD”. If I do end up writing a full fan fiction, I’ll try to make sure that she isn’t just an obstacle to Blackstede and that she gets to have the cool moments that Mina has in the book

Lucius as Lucy because they’re both polyamorous and they both get killed/almost killed by Dracula/Blackbeard. Also, someone on discord pointed out that their names are basically the same already

Jim as Van Helsing because the prospect of Jim as a vampire hunter who acts first and then explains nothing until the very last minute is perfect to me. Also, I’m pretty sure Van Helsing’s wife was killed by vampires, and that could easily translate into Jim having their family killed by vampires as a motivation.

Oluwande as John Seward. This is something I still need to work on a bit since a large part of Seward’s character is that he’s in love with Lucy, but besides that, Seward is one of the few characters who actually has brain cells, and he’s also paired up with Van Helsing for most of the novel and since Jim is already filling that role, it makes sense to have Olu as their sidekick.

Black Pete as Arthur Holmwood just because he’s dating Lucius in the show and Arthur is boring enough that it’s very easy to copy and paste Black Pete in his place.

Dracula’s wives are Izzy, Ivan, and Fang, just because that’s Blackbeard’s crew. The wives aren’t really developed in the book so it’s very easy to just throw them in. I am also incredibly amused by the prospect of Izzy being Blackbeard’s malewife and getting scolded for almost eating Stede

Buttons is Mr. Swales and I will not be taking any questions at this time. I’m correct.

That’s everything I have so far. I’m still trying to figure out who to cast as Quincey Morris, the third of Lucy’s suitors and resident cowboy. I’m tempted to throw in Calico Jack purely because of the cowboy vibes he gives off, but it doesn’t make much sense besides that.

I do have an idea of what the story would look like, and I’m VERY excited because it’s surprisingly easy to tweak the story of Dracula to fit OFMD, but I don’t want to throw all of my ideas out here since I’m genuinely interested in seeing other people’s ideas of what this AU might look like

[heartoftheserpent]

Talk to me about Sirius the Jacobite

OKAY SO

i don't claim to be an expert in British history or Catholicism (if someone wants good Catholic history i'd recommend, well, YOU), but the parallels here are too strong for me to ignore.

So.

The International Statute of Secrecy was passed in 1689, according to Pottermore. JRK has offered a FEW reasons for this. Notably, the Salem Witch Trials, as well as a delegation of wizards being rejected by William and Mary after asking for protection from the monarchy.

Sooo, this is interesting, because BOTH of those things happened AFTER 1689. They happened in '90 and '92, when the Statute went fully into effect. So what happened in 1689?

Obviously this is going to be really obvious to anyone who went to school in England, but like, Americans don't learn anything about the history of most other countries. So maybe this will be helpful to other Americans, or to people from *any* country where they don't learn about British history.

in 1689, there was the "Glorious Revolution" in England. James II had only ruled for three years, but what made this REALLY important is that he was the last Catholic King of England. In fact, after 1689, there was a law in the Bill of Rights that there COULD be no more Catholic Monarchs, nor could a reigning monarch marry a Catholic. So we have this connection between wizards going underground and vanishing from public life at the same time Catholics finally lost power for good.

Also, much like with a religious schism, persecution was going strong with wizards, but there's no real way to TELL if someone is a wizard/religion, except by invading their private space and seeing tools of the trade. There were many secret Catholics who feared the reign of William and Mary, who succeeded after James II, and they pretended to be Protestant. There's a ton of hunting and violence and persecution, both ways (Protestants -> Catholics and Catholics -> Protestants) over the years depending on who was in power.

We know there was close linkage between the (Catholic) Monarchy and wizards - Lucius Malfoy I attempted to marry Elizabeth I, and Armand Malfoy came over from France with William the Conqueror as far back as 1066. There's also the connection between the Arthuriana link (Merlin is apparently a Slytherin) and religion, as in many versions of the Arthur myth, Catholicism plays a large role.

So as soon as the last Catholic King is defeated, wizards go underground.

Sirius mentions that Walburga thought that "being a Black made you practically royalty." What if he's not being facetious?

James II wasn't KILLED during the Glorious Revolution. In fact, he fled to France, and led several unsuccessful attempts to retake the crown, and so did a few of his descendants, in 1715 and 1745/46. But I'm not focusing on the uprisings: I'm focusing on the fact that there were, in fact, several entire communities of secret Catholics who dreamed of returning him to the throne. They were called Jacobites.

Catholic ritual and iconography lends itself much more strongly to a connection with magic than Anglican does. It makes sense that the Wizarding World, at least in the UK, would be primarily aligned with Catholicism. Maybe there were a lot of "ceremonies" and "miracles" that had a lot to do with wizards and magic. Maybe that was a good way for them to hide themselves, or maybe there was some service they were rendering to the bishops that helped them with defense and permissiveness.

So, I don't think it's farfetched to think that there's a marriage and bloodline connection between the Blacks and the Stuarts. And with wizards being so long-lived, plenty of them would have kept that tradition alive. The Black Family traces back to the Middle Ages (likely coming over with William also), and their family crest, Toujours Pur, is in French - like where James II fled to, where he had many family connections.

I wish we got a family tapestry that went farther back!!

[raydioactivegeorg]

hello guess who just watched all of our flag means death almost in one day

I HAVE THINGS TO SAY OK so first of all. mor parallels specifically that one guy man idk how to spell anyone's names but ed's bitch

he and rosenbergcould get along really well

then also in the last episoDe ED WHY DID HE HAVE TO DO THAT TO HIM how is his name spelled. lucius???? the one who isnt illiterate he was my favorite smh my head

i love jim. i love them

i really liked the episode with the fuckery it was my favorite i think

man this show started off so happy wnd wholesome and i was just aksjasjkahsjdbsjdnmsjs and now what the fuck. i heard they're making a second season and they better sort everything out

ALSO THE SCENE WHERE MARY EXPLAINS TO STEDE WHAT SHE SEES BEING IN LOVE AS I JUST AKDBDKFBSKDBSJDHKS

ok im done i think

YAYAYAYAYAUJAKEKALEJAPENALEJAYAYAYYAYAYYYYYYY

you are so right omlLWLSNDLAK izzy hands and rosenberg would be besties but also rosenberg would get murdered by izzy in like 2 minutes probably. SAD. oh well there’s other stewards /j

also ive seen at least 2 arts of izzy hands with lbqfm so. there’s that

AAAAAA I KNOW RIGHT AGUGHHH LUCIOUS HES MY FAVORITE HES MY BEST FRIEND HES MY PAL HES MY HOMEBOY HES MY ROTTON SOLDIER MY SWEET CHEESE MY GOOD TIME BOY

jim 💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

TRUE THE FUCKERY EPUSODE

they ARE they’re making a season two i can’t wait

TRUEEEE also i love mary and stede like i’m so happy they don’t hate each other and like. mary being the #1 ally hell yeah