#literally yelling screaming crying throwing up etc at how cute they are

[kbergceramics]

behold!

feets!

[1eos]

Hi, just read your post about immigrant mothers ruining their kid's jobs. My mother is not an immigrant but she's asian and she cannot for the life of her be considerate with my previous job situation.

I earned 2k monthIy. It's quite low bc we're poor and I have to use half of my pay to support my family. So I decided to take this remote part time job for savings (not just for me but for the family also) and bc of that I am almost in front of my laptop 24/7. It's a report writing job and usually I would have 2 reports weekly to be submitted within 4 days.

My mother hated that I am always in my room doing work and would get so angry because "I listen to the employers more than her". She would make me do a lot of house chores when she knew I was tired from work just to spite me, saying that in the house I do the least chores???? Yeah bc I have a deadline to catch OMG.

Usually I would plan my week for the reports but then she would make me drive her for errands etc and would guilt trip me if I don't do so. Because of this I would stay up all night trying to finish the report just so that she won't throw a fit. Also, I have 2 other brothers who have a lot of free time but just for gaming, not for chores.....but somehow I'm the bad guy......which also makes me believe all asian mothers are "boy moms" but that's for another day.

The problem about these mothers is not because they don't understand their children. It's because they DO NOT WANT to. Because if they do, it means they have to listen/cater to you; not the other way around. They rather die than doing THAT.

first n foremost i haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate that you're going thru this :(. it's truly thee worst to be sabotaged by a mother its truly so insidious and too many ppl in this day and age think its cute or like something we just have to suffer thru bc hey that lady gave birth to us and helped raise us. like the idea that GIRLS --bc they rarely if ever do this to sons--are literally put on earth to toil and suffer and serve their mothers, brothers, aunties etc until some man comes along and then u serve him w no thought or care for ourselves until we die is sooooooooo pervasive.

like its so sad that in 2024 you have someone purposefully going out of her way to sabotage your hustle :(((((((((((((((((( and i won't do the annoying 'just move out!' bc trust me ik how hard it is to move out right now!!!!!!!!! i will say i hope you maintain the strength and energy to persevere thru the sabotage 😐 you will win. misogyny will not win! m*thers who are mad that their daughters aren't just rolling over to be the family doormat. and its like? you'd think they'd be happy but that post partum jealousy is something else i'll tell you that

i still remember being a kid and my mom waiting until i was totally asleep to force me awake to put two dishes in the dish washer?????? and would be yelling and totally pissed off that im not standing at attention to do the dishes at 11pm 😭😭😭😭😭 bitch i was in literal rem sleep why are u screaming at an unconscious child? just lacking control or excitement in their own lives and take it out on their daughters its fucking sick

bc you're right lolllll its not that they 'dont understand' they deadass do not want to. which is why i don't believe in extending grace for bad mothers in a lot of these situations bc why the hell do i have to put myself in YOUR shoes and suffer disrespect always thinking about YOUR feelings when for the first 18 years you were the ONLY adult??? absolutely bizarre. i hope one day we can stop lighting up mothers for shit they can't control like crying babies or having to breastfeed and clock them for the way theyre cornerstones in keeping the patriarchy alive. and the specific bullshit mothers dole out and get away with it bc society expects total devotion to mothers especially from daughters like i need everyone to wake it up bc there's nooooo reason for a grown ass person to be sabotaging you like that! a lot of us are living in the house with our worst opponents and i hate it!

but bottom line? I AM ROOTING FOR YOU ANONNNN WE WILL MAKE IT OUT OF HERE I PROMMY

[m1ckeyb3rry]

He looks so squishable omg LMAO THE HORSE SHIT BUT CLOUDIE IS SUCH A CUTE NAME TOO SJDHSJS this is giving me horse fever

LMAOOO truly the new bar: what tier of cupcakes are they willing to buy if it’s not insanely expensive it’s a no

OHHH ok lowk I don’t think I paid attention to that part of the gameplay in Oras which is probably why I don’t remember LMAO but YES THAT DUDE

HAHAHA it’s ok I laughed at myself it happens too often atp

Pause rough and tumble yuki….rough and tumble yuki??!!! Where was this idea all my life….wait that fr would’ve cooked wtf that would also be sooo interesting to merge tgt with him being religious plus his guilt etc etc the potential….abt to turn yuki into an oc /j

But FR im crying jjk rlly a shit show BUT idk if you saw YUTA CONFIRMED ALIVE WE ALL CHEERED but tbh who really is watching/consuming BLLK for the plot alone let’s be real

NO BECAUSE aiku coming back later on as an addition to the defense lineup or team in general or playing some kinda role Lowk would’ve been a lot more enjoyable for me…like why are you throwing him in with the bllkers NOW (not just because of oaeu has me cracking up) I completely agree like he should’ve left and come BACK LATER I would’ve totally ate up future rival aiku….the potential…alas….

AHAHAHA we’re linked up fr can’t leave out those hair wax jokes but omg him finding reader with Barou’s corpse first has me crying /sad I love how you actually thought out the usability of the teams though because when I played I DEFINITELY just went with whatever pokemon I liked regardless of typing and stats LMAOOK

Karasu screaming at her is so real LMAOA reminds me of him yelling at people during the bowling/Shibuya outing chapter LOL I’m trying to think of a rare water type pokemon but atp I’m just gonna google because I definitely didn’t read the dex entries in depth the first one that comes to mind is feebas though but tbh thats kinda just in the same boat as magikarp so er (clampearl maybe….? Or maybe skrelp idk dragalge seems pretty cool comparatively so) ok wait while I’m looking at water types anyone know the lore behind phione and manaphy why am I just realizing they aren’t related evolution wise pause im now realizing that it didn’t have to be a rare water type which makes more sense i somehow read somewhere that “reader fishes out a rare pokemon (from the sea) and trades that” but if that were the case she could’ve just kept it to fulfill the water type requirement idk what i was thinking going w this uh

REAL the evil govt secretly silencing the voices of anyone who disagrees…guys the world is building fr we just cracked the code behind the champion situation too (reps dad being bribable is so real)

LMFAOOOO IM CRYING “yeah we got bored and went to the moon nbd”

LMAOAO the “i know a guy” trope is so real and so iconic im crying they go find hiori and he’s like “oh yeah my bad that’s my pokemon the size of a small sky scraper she’s harmless” (id imagine its in aurorus form for this to be funny) last time i remember aurorus was from the show and from what I remember of it trying to protect amaura i can also imagine it being protective of hiori and almost freezing mc’s teams asses off LMAOOOO (“it don’t bite” “YES TF IT DO”) you’re getting me too invested in this first it was oaeu now pokemon au i fear this cooks too hard….

You see my first thought was also Barou but for logistical reasons that’s a no here pause gagamaru cooking (literally)!!! Imagine he starts making them just like in the forest or out in the tall grass so people think it’s sketchy (kinda like some food trucks yk) but turns out his stuff is all natural AND fire (ness having low nutrient poffins is so real)

AIKU GARY HAHAHA that just reminds me of Gary’s cheerleaders and the cheer/chant they had for him I’m crying imagine aiku had one

OH SHDGSHSHS I never had an aegislash jn game so that explains why idk the lore LMAO (I did have a friend who swore by it and constantly hyped up its stats though, fr doing like aegislash promotion) Nagiy/ns number one shipper aegislash!!! LMAOO stop this could actually cook as a pokemon anime season wtf someone get game freak and whoever animates pokemon in here rn….reader jumpscaring Nagi in their next battle with aegislash is so funny

I’ll never not be amazed by how much content you can churn out wtf I usually see people writing like three fics just the time you’ve done fifteen and as we’ve already discussed your fics are LONG I’m fr imagining that Justin Bieber gif rn (I’m not even kidding I think of the phrase “doing gods work” and then that gif and audio pop up so congrats you’ve definitely been cemented in with that LMAOO) but SAME love our yap sessions!!

- Karasu anon

RIGHT IT’S LITERALLY PERFECT FOR HIM brooo ponies specifically always have the cutest names…the pony i learned to ride on way back when i was like 11 was named sugar 🥹 and then the ponies i learnt to jump on were named candy and penny like TELL ME THAT’S NOT ADORABLE 😭😭😭 horses usually don’t have such cutesy names sadly but some of them are mad majestic (i’ve known horses named zeus, palermo, arctic, rhea, and heathcliff to name a few like why do they all lowkey have aura)

LMAOO it’ll be the same mfs buying both tiers too like don’t let yourself be treated like the random unnamed girl who got grocery store cookies and was cancelled on so otoya could play video games with reader 😭 only accept the man who plays video games with you so you didn’t walk to his house for nothing and buys you gourmet fancy ass cupcakes for literally no reason 🤩 nah because tbh bfb otoya as a concept cracks me up he’s just so ridiculous with everything he does like there’s zero reason for him to be doing all of that (i remember i kept telling you that karasu’s bfb would be less crack-ish and you were like otoya’s wasn’t that bad?? but now that you’ve read karasu’s version i hope you see what i meant 😩)

rough and tumble yukimiya would’ve been AMAZING…something about how he turned to religion as a way to repent for some of the bullshit he pulled in his childhood + he felt like him getting scouted just for being handsome was so lucky it HAD to be an act of god + him feeling like if he acts out god will punish him (maybe he views his failing eyesight as a punishment for his past sins??) and send him back to where he came from hence his mega kind and polite personality which is a facade for his more selfish NEL personality + him and kaiser getting along because of their backstories but also butting heads because of the diff ways they dealt with things (kaiser forsaking any notion of god to care about himself vs yukimiya trusting anyone BUT himself in search of some kind of solace and reassurance that things will stay as good as they now are) + isagi showing yukimiya another way of being yourself while still not being a bad person and showing that it’s alright to make mistakes (yukimiya perfectionism flaw??) as long as you learn from them…CUT THE CAMERAS DEADASS kaneshiro better give me custody of yukimiya in just three ask responses i’ve taken his canon info and given him a way more compelling and deep backstory that would guarantee him to be a fan favorite 🥱 honestly it’s kind of sad because i could never write this version of yukimiya as he’s just divorced enough from canon that it wouldn’t make sense in a fic but he will ALWAYS be in my mind now i think he’s 1000x more compelling than canon yukimiya without (i believe) compromising his core character traits and in fact actually adding continuity and building off of them (if rough and tumble yukimiya was given enough good panels [which considering he’s in an au with less players and therefore more focus on each character he probably would have a decent amount] he would def have that kaiser vibe to him like i can see him being popular and people posting abt his tragic backstory and how hot he is etc etc)

YESSS YUTA MADE IT lowkey it was so random though like last chapter there was the whole “we need to save okkotsu” cliffhanger and now he’s just here and chilling hello??? also how is HIGURUMA still around 😭 and this shit with the elders and all of that like where did that come from…is gege trying to set up a sequel or smth 🤔 idk i’m very lost i think i just need to see how it ends so i can move on from it for a while

i think aiku as a future rival would’ve cooked so hard maybe he drops some “you guys reminded me what it feels like to have an ego” (as a callback to his striker past) type of line and barou’s like “oh so you have an ego now 🤨 good because that means it’ll be even more fun to crush you 😒” and that specific game is focused on them and their rivalry (it could be a good place to add more barou backstory into the main manga too as well as aiku lore)

i never understood stats or anything but i always took typing seriously!! as well as moves and whatnot (if a move didn’t do damage though i never let my pokémon keep it) RKFHSJSJ no because it’s so sad karasu’s the one who goes back and finds her (after nagi tells him to because at the end it’s nagi and reader before reader goes on alone to fight barou…nagi leaves to evacuate everyone but he’s like “yo karasu please go check on her”) and it’s just her and her houndoom lying with barou and his houndoom (who are both dead UGHHHH the angst is insane)

HELP waits actually yk what’s funny is reader does actually end up with a dragalge on her team so at some point she catches a skrelp ig?? but she doesn’t trade it away (lowkey dragalge isn’t one i’ve put much though into like it and donphan are just kinda there but they don’t yet have the plot relevance that houndoom aegislash gyarados and galvantula do)…HAHAHA yeah she catches a non water type to trade!! i’m thinking it’ll be like a pikachu or something because then everyone reading will be like “oh of COURSE she has a pikachu 🙄🙄🙄” but then she trades it away for a magikarp LDFHSJSKSK anyways yeah if you put manaphy and a ditto in the daycare you’ll get a phione egg!! not sure what the lore connection is but yeah that’s the in game mechanic (i got a manaphy during one of the mystery gift events and i used to spam breed phione’s and put them on the global trade center so people would give me their legendaries in exchange LMAOAAO i was kinda diabolical with it)

no because the world is so deep i’m so invested now!! REO’S DAD BEING CORRUPT AND BRIBABLE JUST MAKES SM SENSE lowkey maybe that’s why reo’s traveling alone/with mc trio instead of training at home with his dad!! like he wants to actually be a proper champion and is too idealistic to realize the government will never let him do that with that mindset…okay wait and instead of going the stereotypical route maybe reader defeating barou and the evil team isn’t enough for them to fix things because the root of the problem (the government) hasn’t been fixed so then in order to get justice for barou she’s like “well ig i have all 8 badges” so she (along with nagi as her rival, tullia who’s just been doing random shit this whole time and has the team for it, and reo who wants to be champion for a diff reason) decides to join the championship conference and makes it through until the end (again considering galvantula alone swept through half of barou’s team it’ll make sense) where she’s told by the government that she has to throw the match and she seems to agree (unlike barou) but then instead of doing that she beats mr mikage and exposes the government on live tv before they can cut the cameras…and then the gym leaders + elite four + elite four candidates (isagi kaiser bachira kunigami) are like “aight might as well” and reveal they’ve been planning a mutiny against the government for a WHILE (another reason why isagi is always so secretive around them) and barou was involved too but it wasn’t supposed to happen for a while however with reader’s actions they decide there’s no time like the present and execute a (much better planned) mutiny while reader and co + mc trio watch in awe (you KNOW karasu is so mad yayoi never mentioned anything to him) so it kind of avoids that “kids doing everything while incompetent adults just sit around” trope while still having reader and co + mc trio be integral parts of the ending??

HAHAHA mc trio could have their own spinoff fr…episode nagi pokémon au KFJDJD they randomly find a crashed spaceship full of clefairy and clefables and somehow chigiri and/or reo are revealed to have mechanical expertise?? plus nagi’s just randomly a genius fsr so they manage to fix up the spaceship so the clefairy and clefable can go back to the moon (lowkey i think smth like this happens in one of the original eps of the anime but it’s bllk au so it’s funnier) and they leave an egg with nagi as thanks (specifically nagi because according to reo’s [at the time] kirlia they like his hair as it reminds them of the moon even though lowkey nagi did the least for them) or like do you remember that one episode where it was like a competition for only fighting type pokémon?? imagine reo has been SET on evolving his kirlia into a gardevoir but when he hears about the competition he’s like “time to switch gears” and while reader and co are having the fossil arc with hiori, mc trio is just running around completing various side quests trying to find a dawn stone so reo can evolve kirlia into a gallade instead…bonus points if reo misses the registration date because he doesn’t find the dawn stone in time so now he just randomly has a gallade (who he loves very much don’t get me wrong LMAOOO he was just building his team around eventually having a gardevoir and now he has to switch stuff up)

HELPPP because okay realistically hiori’s team is super super intimidating if you think about it…like you look at him and he seems so sweet you think he’d have a team like otoya’s (#otoyaslander) and then he releases his first pokémon and it’s a metagross 😭 his pokémon are def all super protective of him too…they probably HATE reader in particular because between donphan and galvantula (aka the goat…lowkey i’m surprised at how much it actually carries every confrontation) alone she’s destroying his team 😩 considering donphan is a ground type so it’s strong against aurorus and luxray, galvantula is bug-electric so it’s strong against metagross (psychic is weak to bug apparently??), swanna, and kingdra, so that only leaves nidoqueen with a type advantage…until you factor in that gyarados is not only a water type (so strong against her ground typing) but also flying so it’s immune to her ground type attacks 😭 and this is completely ignoring houndoom who is metagross’s perfect counter, aegislash if she has it at that point, and dragalge 😰 it took me so long picking a team with type coverage for basically every type but i’m still always amazed whenever i match reader up against other characters and realize she absolutely cooks them

HELPPPP GAGAMARU AS A POFFIN FOOD TRUCK WORKER IS SO REAL i can see him having an ursaring and they just drive around selling poffins and he doesn’t have a phone number or anything so if you want them you have to hunt him down 😭 the REAL reason yukimiya has an alakazam is so he can just teleport LMAOAO meanwhile reader and co have to fly on flying pokémon (reader and tullia borrow karasu’s and otoya uses his altaria) to find him wherever he is if they need him

nah because you’re so right aegislash has to be a shipper there’s 0 reason for it to throw the romance subplot in except for some drama JFKSKS to be fair it was probably rlly bored while waiting for a trainer to show up 😭 it’s kind of rude even once it’s captured but then houndoom beats it up and it behaves after that 🤩 no fr it’s a role reversal of the cleffa incident like reader and nagi both pull up with new pokémon and nagi throws out his cottonee (side note but cottonee/whimsicott is such a peak nagi pokémon tbh) meanwhile reader whips out her aegislash and nagi’s just like WHAT THE FUCK (reo and chigiri are just like “😃❔” because they have no clue why nagi’s tripping meanwhile nagi’s trying to process that he did in fact have an isekai romance arc with reader and now he has to face her after he literally asked if it’s okay for him to rizz her up “for the plot” when she’s dating karasu (she is NOT dating karasu) (karasu has no idea why nagi keeps looking at him awkwardly) (tullia and otoya ask chigiri and reo if nagi is into men/karasu) (chigiri and reo can honestly say they have 0 idea)

HAHAHA no it’s not even just 15 since may because that’s not counting the jjk requests i got OR anything i wrote for myself (both versions of bfb, freaky friday, hollyhock and peregrine chapters) i fear i am quite prolific in the summer…fall is always lowkey the mira hiatus era where i rlly slow down and then suddenly come december i go crazy and cook until the next fall

[sleepysnk]

we all needed this, especially right now with the current events in the manga. i love Jean and he has always been a favorite character of mine, he deserves a happy ending 😔💗. enjoy these!

Dad Headcanons

Characters: Jean Kirstein

Warnings: Mentions of NSFW (not a lot), pregnancy, birth

Jean Kirstein:

- Jean is definitely a guy to pull out, but this time things got a little crazy and he actually ended up doing it inside of you. of course you didn't really think anything of it, your mind was in pure bliss.

- that's when about 3 or 4 weeks later, you began to feel sick. you weren't yourself at all, you were tired, sleeping in late, having headaches, and you started throwing up a lot. it concerned Jean a lot considering he cared about you.

- Jean was so worried 😔 he definitely stayed up during the night making sure you didn't throw up, he also got you anything you needed. Whether it be snacks, water, cuddles, he was there to give you whatever you needed.

- when you found out you were pregnant, it was at an usual doctor's visit. your blood work showed it all and Jean couldn't be more excited to start a new chapter with you, it was so exciting. he almost cried too 🥺.

- Jean instantly became protective and careful with you, he didn't want anything happening to his child and he would do anything to keep you both safe.

- he understood all the symptoms, he called up his mom and told her about it all. she gave him tons of advice on how to deal with the morning sickness, constant peeing, mood swings, etc. she was very supportive and occasionally she would come over and help you out.

- he fell in love with the bump 🥺 you guys took pictures together and they were so adorable. he kisses the bump often and he'd put his hand over it to feel the baby 🥰.

- Jean wanted a girl so bad, he deadass would talk about raising a little girl with you. it was literally all he talked about, when you found out you were having a girl, he couldn't contain his excitement. he legit lost it 😭.

- he definitely gets a kick out of you waking up to pee so many times 😭, sometimes he'll count and make fun of you. all jokes though.

- watching you get big was definitely something he loved to watch, he felt like it went by so fast and he couldn't wait to meet your little girl 🥺. Jean would kiss your bump every night and lay his head on your belly.

- when your water broke Jean wasn't even there, he was with Connie when Sasha called him yelling about it. he deadass dropped what he was doing and rushed to the hospital with Connie by his side 😭.

- this baby was a mess 🥺 he kept apologizing for not being there, but you assured him he was okay and that you were glad he was there.

- it was a long process, he definitely had a hard time hearing you cry and scream in pain. he held your hand, kissing it softly so it could provide some ease with the pain. Connie and Sasha were there for support 😔.

- eventually when you gave birth he was so so happy. he cried 🥺 he held his daughter for the first time and broke down sobbing, she was so beautiful to him. he loved her.

- Jean literally would never let go of her, he was so astonished by her. like... he had this 'i made this' mindset 😭.

- he stayed by your side making sure you were okay, he told you how much he loved you and how amazing you did.

- the first few weeks home were a bit hectic, you never wanted to sleep more than you did now and it was a very tiring process. luckily, you had Jean around to help you.

- Jean would wake up most of the time, he knew how tired you were, so he took the upper hand and fed your daughter, changed her diaper, etc. he was surprisingly so good at it 🥺, he learned a lot when his mom would come over.

- HE WOULD SPOIL HER ROTTEN. she was his little princess and he felt like she deserved the best.

- Jean would buy those cute little footie pajamas for her to wear 😭💗, this baby would be dressed in the cutest little outfits ever. Jean knew how to dress her.

- you would sometimes wake up to him sleeping on the couch with her in his arms, it was definitely something you loved to see 🥺 it was so adorable.

- Jean would teach her how to crawl and he'd even try to teach her random things 😭.

- "Jean.. she's five months old.. she can't understand a word you're saying"

- "babe you never know till you try.. now, say dad!"

- her first words were 'mama' and Jean was salty asf.

- Jean is a stuffed animal guy, he bought her so many stuffed animals and plushies that you even couldn't believe the huge amount. her favorite was a pink teddy bear with a heart on it's cheek, she would never let it go.

- he taught her how to walk, this man was so determined to teach her how to walk. when she took her first steps, he was so excited and he jumped around. IT WAS SO ADORABLE 🥺.

- CONNIE AND SASHA ARE THE PERFECT AUNT AND UNCLE IDC.

- he's so so thankful for you and your daughter. he tells you late at night how much he loves you and he feels so blessed to have you both in his life 🥺..

- "i'm so blessed to have you and our daughter in my life (y/n).. i couldn't ask for better from you."

- he wants many more, trust me on that.

- Jean is an amazing dad to this little girl. you can't change my mind.

[jaskier-cult]

okay i remember seeing a hamilton au fanart once. it pictured yennefer as angelica, and she was yelling at geralt (the scene from “congratulations”) about cheating on jaskier. i really want to see it, but i can’t find it again, so time to throw out some hamilton au headcanons

[keep in mind this is very very very rudimentary and was not fleshed out at all. please be kind to me]

* jaskier is eliza

* geralt is hamilton

* yennefer is angelica

* calanthe is king george

* ciri is philip (yes she dies and it’s very sad)

* lambert is either lafayette or hercules mulligan

* eskel could be aaron burr or john laurens

* vesemir is washington

* this au would use the real-world map, but maybe replace some names with place names from the witcher world

* literally hamilton’s backstory is geralt’s backstory; his father abandoned him, his mother died of illness, he was sent to stay with a cousin and said cousin committed suicide, etc.

* geralt is albino and is picked on for his appearance

* geralt only finds solace in literature, and becomes very good at reading and writing (and is left handed, like hamilton)

* something something some details im missing

* cut to the ball!!

* yennefer was initially interested in geralt because of their shared interests, equal intelligence, shared dry humor, and similar childhoods (yennefer was adopted by the pankratz [schuyler] family)

* [not sure if magic would exist in this au, but i don’t really want to take away yennefer’s disability and struggle, so i might need to figure something out here; maybe the pankratz family saved yennefer and paid for a surgery to help straighten her spine??]

* but then jaskier sees geralt and falls head over heels

* yennefer, jaskier’s older sister, is extremely protective of jaskier; she acts like she hates jaskier, but really, she would do anything - even sacrifice her own happiness - to see jaskier happy and well. when she realizes that jaskier is “helpless” (song) in love with geralt, she steps back and finds a way to get the two together; she sings “satisfied” and breaks down crying after, because it hurts so much to see jaskier so happy, and feel like she lost something

* geralt cheats on jaskier with triss “say no to this”

* “the reynolds pamphlet” happens. jaskier is heartbroken. yennefer sings “congratulations” and goes to support her brother

* jaskier sings “burn”

* jaskier and geralt adopt ciri [won’t have any connection to calanthe because that won’t fit here], and jaskier dotes on her so much. “blow us all away” will be super cute, with ciri trying so hard to be just like her dad (geralt), wanting to fight and be strong; jaskier tries to encourage ciri to pursue the arts, like he studied, but she only really gets the hang of poetry.

* then ciri challenges george eacker (whoever that is in this au) to protect her father’s pride. geralt tells ciri that her pa (jaskier) can’t handle another heartbreak, instructs her on how to duel, and entrusts his personal silver pistol to her. eacker shoots ciri, “stay alive” plays, and ciri dies in jaskier’s arms when she is rushed to a doctor; jaskier screams in heartbreak

* geralt dies in a duel against aaron burr (whoever he is in this au)

* when eliza reads all hamilton’s writing and talks to soldiers and tries to spread his memory and place in history, it’s basically jaskier writing an entire cycle of songs about the “white wolf” (geralt) to keep his memory alive, after he died, and it becomes famous

* “who lives, who dies, who tells your story” would be very emotional and geralt is just looking back at jaskier as he does everything he can to help geralt after he has passed, and geralt just doesn’t understand what he did to deserve the devotion jaskier gives him

* and then jaskier opens up a school to teach and educate children and calls it oxenfurt (the equivalent of the orphanage eliza founds)

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 13 + 14.11.20 lbs

13.11.20

i’m just gonna skim through this one, coz i don’t wanna dwell on the death and maatam and all.

hahahahahahahahaha riddhima is screaming at god for letting this happen and kabir is like “bhagwaan ko beech mein kyun laa rahi ho, mujhe bhi toh credit do!” i truly love this crazyass fucker.

riddhima continuing to scream at god about vansh jissne “KOI KABHI BURA KAAM NAHI KIYA HAI” ?!?!?!!?!?!?!? sis what the fuck???? first of all, none of us over the age of like...... 7, are truly sinless. and THIS MAN PARALYZED AND THREATENED TO KILL YOU MULTIPLE TIMES, FFS.

KABIR IS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, I AM KABIR

now she trying to throw herself off the cliff and for some reason i cannot understand, kabir is holding her back????? literally why, my bro????? let her die, saaari musibatein khatam. ugh, you still have some kinda residual feelings for her from your not-that-kameena days, don’t you?

asalkdjaldkjsaldkjsalkdjl riddhima ke andar OG prerna ka bhoot chadh gaya, she hitting kabir with danda the way Mother India did dhulaayi of yudi in the disco (still one of the most iconic scenes of tellywood for me, istg)

dude, idk if it’s just ego waale possesive issues or he still has feelings for her, but kabir def wants riddhima to be “his girl”. even after danda beating he’s trying to help her as she stumbles around in sadma.

anyway she sauntered off rubbing that stupid muffler of vansh’s on her face. SIS YOU GONNA BREAK OUT IF YOU RUB SUCH GANDA KAPDA ON YOUR FACE.

5 min of flashbacks of vansh. fwding.

family (dadi, chanchal, and all the rest of the riff-raff) has come back home and ghar is all dark.

weird how angre is also with them. i woulda thought he’d be on whatever tasks vansh set him on, instead of doing mandir yatras with these assholes.

mummy has decided to break news in most non-tactful way ever. wearing all white and has set up photu with haar already.

yeah, requisite screaming and crying blah blah. nahi dekhna.

i’m only here for ishani and angre’s reactions. bechaare look genuinely devastated. i mean dadi does too, but bohut hi zyaaaada overdramatic and i’m getting uncomfortable.

riddhima has returned.

to her surprise everyone already knows. zara dimaag lagao behen, how they even found out before you reached??? (ok no i understand you’re numb from trauma rn and can’t think of all this, but i hope your idiot brain thinks of it later.)

WHY THE FUCK IS DADI YELLING AT RIDDHIMA KI TERE HOTE HUE KAISE HUA YEHHHHHH, WHO THE FUCK IS SHE TO TAALOFY GIANT COSMIC DECISIONS LIKE LIFE AND DEATH????? isse apni khud ki jaan nahi sambhali jaati, let alone someone else’s.

holy shit she’s actually saying, “tu toh uski dhaal thi, uske liye tuney goli khaayi thi, iss baar kaise chook gayi????” MAN, FAMILIES OF DESI BOYS REALLY BE FUCKIN WILDDDDDDDDDDDDDD WITH THEIR EXPECTATIONS FROM BAHUS. one time she took a bullet for him wasn’t enough????? you want her to actually fucking die before something happens to him. god forgive me but i really wanna slap this dadi rn.

mummy cooking up some fucking ridiculousssssss story about gunde in the house and how vansh was chasing them and gaadi khaayi mein gir gayi and god knows whatttt

ok she’s saying siya got the call about it and she was running down the stairs while in shock and now whoopsie daisy, she’s in critical condition (probably in a coma or some shit.)

aryan looks sad at the siya news. thank god this mummy ka niyana has basic consideration for someone else other than himself and his mother.

mummy ka rona dhona drama fwding.

ishani is now yelling at angre. which..... kinda deserved. you’re his safety person dude.

ok too much crying. fwding.

riddhima asking mummy why you lie to family about how he died. mummy like how tf i tell them police dragged him out and he died in an encounter for trying to escape. it’s better for them to not know the truth. which.............. ok fair, but coming from this shadyassss woman......

god this mummy ka ainvayi praising vansh waala scene is going on too long. fwding.

riddhima back to room. some more flashbacks. OUFF. FWDING.

obligatory kamre ka tod-phod scene. FWDING!!!!!!!!!!

fell asleep crying and holding one of his coats.

LMAO ISHANI KA MANN NAHI BHARAA GHAR KE ITNE CASUALTIES SE............ SHE’S LIKE WHAT’S ONE MORE????

dadi slapping ishani for doing what any one of us would do, honestly, so.... whatever. fuck off dadi.

ishani telling 100% truth ki jabse this useless b has entered my bhai’s life, his problems have been never ending, i’m fucking sureeeeeeeeee she’s the reason he’s dead. the only voice of reason in this show, truly.

dadi all WOH EK HAADSAAAA THAAAA, NOONE CAN CONTROLLLL THOSEEEE, oh yeah, not the sentiment that you were expressing to riddhima when she walked in, you stupid old bat. whatever, i’m fwding this scene.

kabir and mishra have entered house. coz they are awwal no. ke sadists. need to get off on watching this family cry and suffer.

LMAO THE LOOK RIDDHIMA GAVE KABIR. HE’S LEGIT SCARED OF HER.

angre bhi staring daggers at kabir. chal hatt, i know for sure you’re behind saving vansh and stashing him somewhere to crawl out whenever it’s the right time. 

body nahi mili blah blah blah

lol this one’s face clearly says milegi bhi kaise, main tum logon ki tarah nikamma nahi hoon. i have 16% success rate. it’s low but it’s more than y’all 0%.

lmaoooooo oh DOW DIGGY DIGGY DOW DIGGY DOW DOW, i love you sooooooooo much.

ALSO WHAT A MISSED OPPORTUNITY TO MAAROFY THE PUN KI “MAINE VANSH KE VANSH KO MITAAAAA DIYAAAAAAAA” severely disappointed in you, kabir.

yup. appropriate response. to just generally all the men in your life.

lmao riddhima like you arrested vansh ONLY COZ I LOVEDDDDDDD HIMMMMMMMMMMMM. lol the amount of self delusion. sis, his feelings for vansh were faaaaaaar more powerful and intense than anything he ever felt for your dumb ass.

kabir saying there’s nothing left for you here, why don’t you come back to me and lmao............... he tried.

 “riddhima nahi. riddhima vansh raisinghania.” 

ok whatever you say, sis. i’m just grateful to god this manhoos episode is finally over.

———————————————————————

14.11.20

redo of last scene.

lmao kabir is like I HATED VANSH WAAAAAAAAAAAAY BEFORE YOUR DUMB ASS FELL FOR HIM. YEAH I DON’T LIKE THAT YOU PICKED HIM OVER ME, BUT I’M NOT SO BAD THAT I’D TAKE REVENGE FROM HIM FOR THAT. yeah, dude. he just wanted his money; not youuuuuu. like..... chillll. kahaan se aata hai logon ko itnaaaaa confidence khud pe???

kabir saying i had proof vansh killed ragini, i found his watch there next to the body. she’s like i had it, i took it to repair it, and ragini died in front of me. vansh wasn’t anywhere near there.

lmao she’s back to shoving him around. what an annoying bitch she is. 

kabir like did you SEE who shot ragini? no????????? then it could very well have been vansh, right????? plus i got that footage from 3 years ago.

she’s like hein hein heinnnnn where you get it from when i burnt that chip????????? OH NOW SHE’S USING HER BRAINNNNN. SO WAS VANSH THE ONE RENDERING HER SO FUCKING STUPID? NOW HE’S NOT ADDLING HER BRAIN WITH LUST HORMONES, HER 3 BRAIN CELLS ARE FINALLY WORKING AGAIN!!!!!!!!!! take this as proof, ladies. MEN MAKE YOU FUCKING DUMB AS SHIT BY JUST MAKING YOU BREATHE THE SAME AIR AS THEM.

kabir saying someone from inside the house probably saved it and sent it. and that vansh made all this happen by taking mishra’s gunnnn and forcing them to take the sunsaaaan paaath and he tried to runnn and blah blah blah.

again he’s asking her to come be with him and she’s like gtfo i don’t wanna see your cuteass face anymore, you’re dead to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ok she didn’t say the cute bit, i did. i think y’all already knew that. but how to resist??? he sho cute!!!!!! 

mishra like this b kuch zyaada nahi bol gayi???? 

“dil par jo chot lagti hai, woh nazar nahi aati, but ghaav bohut gehra hota hai. yeh dard maine bhi mehsoos kiya tha, jab riddhima mujhe chod ke chali gayi thi vansh ke paas.” heinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn? now he suddenly is/was truly in love with her again???? bhai, tu decide karle, ki if she’s just a pawn to you or something more. ainvayi jhool raha hai idhar udhar.

mishra like, ok whatever, but where vansh’s body tho???

clearly not him. the head shape alllllll different.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS THEY FINALLY PUT RRAHUL’S FINE ASS IN JEANS!!!!!!

again, no wedding ring. dead body is not vansh.

“bhagwaan jaane kahaan chali gayi uski laash.” lmao i really loled the way he delivered the line. i really love him the mostttttttttt.

kabir you are honestly suchhhhhhhhhhhhhh an idiot, if you think not getting his body is a good thing. DON’T YOU KNOW HIM AT ALL??????? AT ALLLLLLLL????? NO BODY MEANS HE’S STILL OUT THERE, BIDING HIS TIME TO FUCKING COME GET YOUUUUUU.

he’s like good, vansh didn’t even get antim sanskaaaar. who knew kabir was sooooo religious??????

vansh so efficient and independent ki khud ka kriyakaram kar raha hai. aatmanirbhar ho toh aise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

not before he maarofied his own pocket tho.

“bohut jald iss VR mansion ke aage KR mansion ka signboard hoga.” hein???????? the R in there is for RAISINGHANIA. why the hell would you add one random surname to your name??????

YEAH. I KNOW THOSE CHITTAAA-ASSS EARSSSSSSS.

OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG BHAGWAAAAAAN NE MERIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII SUNNNNNNNNNNN LIIIIIIIIII THEY MADE HIM SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE ASALKJDLKJDSLAKJDLASKAS

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG THE DUMBASS FAKE DEEEP VOICE IS GONE TOOOOOOOOO ALKSDJSALKDJLASKJDLSAKJDLASKJDLASKJDLKJLKS I JUST

styling also EXAAAAAAACTLY HOW I LIKE IT.

helllllllllllllllllllllllo hunny. NOW YOU’VE MADE THIS SHOW FINALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY WORTH WATCHING. bas thodaaaa saa tharakkkkk ka maska i need to make my tellywood viewing experience sooooooo much easier. AUR WOH MUJHE AAAAAAJ SE MIL GAYAAAAAAAAAAA.

ok 13 days later.

bitch looks better after going through life-altering trauma than i do on my most stable mental health days.

talking to portrait about how the misery is unending, etc. etc.

kabir still calling her. WHY??????? dude just take the L and move the fuck on.

lmaooooooo mummy is like 13 din rone ki acting kar karke aankhon ki band baj gayiiiiii. 

standard mwahahahahaha we succedded bufoonery from too complacent evil ppl. dumb dumb dumbbbbb!

but let’s admire this evil cutie bean.

riddhima’s mangalsutra which she justttttt set down on that bureau missing. she in a panic.

ofc these two are behind it.

ishani wants the truth about that dayyyyyyy and aryan jumping in about how riddhima never loved vansh and just always doubted him and blah blah.

my question is since when aryan loves vansh bhaiiiiiii so much huh???????

anyway. this happens. and those two are left plotting some more about getting the truth out.

VIHAAAAAAAAAAAN is the new name.

seeeeee????? i knew his ass had some lucrative skill in the current economy. he some tech bro types.

CAN YOU BELIEVEEEEEEEEE THEY HID THAT FUCKING JAWLINE AND THOSE DIMPLES UNDER THAT BEARD FOR 5 WHOLE MONTHSSSSSSSSS. FUCKING HUMAN RIGHTS CRIMEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

unf, boy got cake. that ass just needed shirali to stay tf away from it.

also askdjalskjdlsakdjlaskjdlkj they turned ragini’s container waala room into his hacker man cave. what a wonderfully multipurpose room!

honestly, i’m just soooooooooo relieved i can just watch this show for eyecandy now. kaleje ko suchhhhhhhh thandak, yougaizzzzz.

banda khud vansh ke net worth (5000 cr.) ko dekh kar hairaan pareshaan. yeah, this much wealth accumulation is fucking immoral, asshole. you vansh did deserve to get thrown off a fucking cliff.

show laaaaaaaaaakh convince karne ki koshish karle ki yeh koi aur hai, my bullshit meter says it’s vansh vansh and no one else but vansh.

unrealistic af, someone PRINTING photos out in this day and age. what kinda tech person are you???????

lmao he’s checking out each photo for each family member and the commentssssssss.....

rudra chacha and chanchal chachi: “kaafi expressive faces! koshish bhi kare chupaane ki toh bhi chupaa nahi paa rahe ke lomdiii hain yeh ghar ke.”

aslkdjaslkdjlsakjdlskjdlksj i already like him better than old vansh.

aryan: “doosron ke bharose jeene waala.”

ishani: “raisinghania hone ka bohut ghamand hai, magar bechaari ki shaadi angre se ho gayi.”

how he know that if he not vansh????? angre not even in this set of pics.

siya: “kehte hain jo chal nahi sakte, unka wifi network bohut strong hota hai..... kab, kahaan, kya pakad le, koi nahi jaanta.”

“aur yeh hai....... RIDDHIMAAAAA....... iss parivaar ka most special aur khoobsoorat member.”

“moh aur maaya...... dono ka mel [...]”

yup, i definitely like this cheeky and cheesy persona better than the murder-threatening-paralyzing shit we had to put up with earlier. happy days, you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! happy days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[beecherdrysdale]

Hehe hiii I’m writing this before I go on the treadmill lol.

Alright the screaming will be non stop- and I’ll be glad to make girls jealous lol. I am ready to distract some kids. “GO BRIGID!!!!” Yes we do have some vv hit friends esp you brigid, with dyl and Jamie 😏 the girls would be sooo jealous. Ryan and I bumping each other around will be a regular occurrence. Imao “not again...” yesss the boys are embarrassed but still hold onto each other! Hehe poor Quinners hand. Hmmm maybe I will make it up to him later 😏. Dyl would be a nervous wreck lol. I’d probably throw my sweater at him so that he can close his eyes, but he would still annoy me and ask every 5 secs “is she winning?” “How is she doing” “I can’t look” “this is too much for me to handle” and I chirp him so hard, but would understand because he really likes you :)

Ya right after shower etc. And we go out to celebrate the chirping restarts. I would have to many in my head. At the end of the day Jamie and dylan were amazing and you are proud of them. I’ll be sure to try squeezy applesauce!! Hehe I eat cliff bars between breaks but recently stopped because it took me forever to chew lol so now I just bring a banana to my matches. Brigid we should go to Costco together and ride in the cart- I would probably not bring the boys just cuz Costco’s huge and we would lose them hehe.

Yess team TRAMPLE GET READY. We promise not to damage your suit:) the girls would be jealous hehe.

Ig it is hard. But we understand. If me, you and kesh go to their games, would you sit across the rink or w us lol?. Cactus club is great, the food is très bien. Same w Cora! I’ll take you there !!

Imao people would be so confused on why I was crying but I just saw all of you 🥺 yay pls distract me while I warm up my hips w my resistance band lol. Nah it isn’t weird that you aren’t nervous. Look I’m a confident driver but that entire day was weird. It was summer and like an hour and a half before, I was getting my legs waxed lol and my legs were super slippery because of the oil they put on you after hehe. So first of all I was nervous all ready (shaking lol) and then in the car my entire seat was just so slippery, so that didn’t help and it was like plus 29. But anyways I passed, so ig going through that horrible experience was worth it. I’d probably make eye contact w y’all in between points and just burst out laughing but it’s ok. imao at the end I hit Ryan in the face w a ball. He would be mad cuz you start dying of laughter beside him and Jamie’s like panicking because he doesn’t know what to do and he just get you water. But you are still laughing . I’m down on the court also laughing and Ryan’s just trying to climb and get onto the court to chase me around hehe. Awww Quinner my bb, gotta give him my post match kiss. Ooo time to sometimes like I yell at the screen, but I could just see you being annoyed and yelling.

Ooo yes it’s getting semi spicy at Coachella. Dylan’s getting handsy 😏. Ya Jamie would just be glaring at Dylan’s back lol. And you’re just enjoying the view of Dylan’s hair and the performance lol. Oooo you can play w his hair. Aw thank u Braden for offering, I’ll take you up on that .but I can just see Quinner glaring at us too and getting flustered. He would get so annoyed hehe. I’m so oblivious sometimes, but I get down from bradens shoulders and go on yours lol. You can go on mine too:). meanwhile kesh is just in kirbys shoulders chilling and not even paying attention to what’s happening. Oo I’m not a big fan of makeup. I never wear it. I only have a clear lipgloss that I wear to events and sometimes I don’t even wear it lol.

Imma be honest we will probably not last very long on each other’s shoulders but It would be so cute if you are just watching one of the performances and Dylan or Jamie just come behind you and wrap their arms around your waist from behind and put their chins on top of your shoulder or head 🥺 and you are just swaying to the music with them .... Coachella is so fun at night according to the videos my bro has due to the lights and the fireworks that they release at night!! So you can kiss under the fireworks 🥰.

Our outfits would be amazing, like Brigid your hair would be so cute in Dutch braids!! Hehe yes the guys would look so hot, and not even try but just imagine being at Coachella w this team!! We gotta make sure we don’t forget sunscreen lol . And water, gotta hydrate !!

Ly

-Lexi

lol that’s fun, we love the treadmill. jk i hate treadmills, i feel like i’m not going anywhere when i’m on the treadmill and i can’t stand it. anywaysssss long post

lmao yes please distract my competition so i can win hehe. honestly it might work bc there are rarely hot guys in the stands at swim meets, so you never know. and then they would be like what are they doing bc you guys would be so chaotic up there lol. and everyone’s squeezing everyone else’s hand but pretending they’re not. “no we weren’t holding hands, what are you talking about?” and you’re just absolutely destroying quinner’s hand, so you have to make it up later 😏 and then dyl is just hiding his face in his hoodie, which make sure you wear a shirt under your hoodie ik i never do lol, but you’ll want one bc it is hot af at swim meets. like when you’re wet you feel cold, but in the stands it’s soooo hot. anyways dyl’s face is in your hoodie and he just asks how i’m doing every 5 seconds. “dyl just look yourself, i can’t tell it’s too close” and then he refuses to look so you chirp him lmao. but it’s ok bc then after i win we all have our epic trample hug lol. i love how it’s turned from a hug into just a huge trample lmao 

haha you and ryan preparing chirps the entire time i’m swimming and just saving them til after lmao. but it’s ok bc i’m just chilling with jamie and dyl who were surprisingly really good at keeping me distracted and getting me all of the food i need. yes try squeezy applesauce, i literally love it sm, like i have a strange addiction to it but it’s fine. oh yeahhh clif bars do take a really long time to eat, i kind of forgot about that. personally i’m a weirdo so i hate bananas unless they’re superrrr green. yesss that’s part of our vacay now (i mean we already had going to a store but it’s fine) and then we make the guys push us around in the carts lol. we’ll def lose them at some point, but yk what it’s fine we’ll find them eventually

haha it’s ok i can still sit with you guys, i’ll just be wearing a usa jersey. probably my 1980 o’callahan jersey i got for christmas bc i love it sm. yes please take me to get food lol

hehe yes everyone is confused why you’re crying and you’re just like i’m fine my friends are just here. yes ofc we’ll distract you from your warmups. oof that whole driving test experience sounds awful. anywayssss yes i could def see you making eye contact with us between points and just start laughing and whoever you’re playing is so confused. hehe and then you hit ryan with the ball and he’s mad at me bc i just start laughing, but then he gets over it and decides to go after you lol. meanwhile, jamie’s just like wtf do i do? and he’s trying to get me to drink water lol. and then ofc you give quinner a kiss. but just be warned if you’re not winning or it’s close and i’m stressed about the match i will start screaming at you lol

oooh yes coachella is gonna be so fun. hehe dyl getting handsy 😏 sorry jamie, i love you too bb, but you got to let me and dyl have our moment. and i’ll just be playing with dyl’s hair while we’re watching 🥰 meanwhile, you’ve taken up braden’s offer but then quinner’s jealous so you feel bad lol. so then we take turns on each other’s shoulders. and then kesh is just chilling on kirby’s shoulders oblivious to all the guys getting jealous lmao. but then later we’re just chilling standing there and then jamie comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist and puts his head on my shoulder 🥺 and just swaying together to the music. that’s the softest shit. and kissing under the fireworks 😍 the literal dream. anyways yeah the only makeup i ever ever wear is mascara, but that’s hardly ever, but our outfits would be so cute. and we could do matching dutch braids! omg yes the guys would look so hot, but we have to bring sunscreen for our white boys. and yess water bc i’m always dehydrated

ily too 💗

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Hey, it's me again, I hope you are still open for requests! You said I could ask for Mic content and, if I still can, what about some DadMic headcanons, with his own child and/or an adopted one?! Which one you prefer is fine! I hope you are doing well and thank you for the opportunity you gave me! Take care 💗

A/N: Hey you!! Thank you for requesting, it means a lot that you like my present mic work. And yes, you most definitely can have some DadMic headcanons. If you have any more requests just let me know. I did hours worth of homework and it deleted so i’m kind of like forget school and imma become a professional headcanon writer so honestly hit me up with as much stuff you want :)))))))

-

(i kind of wrote this like you are in the ages of like 6-10 so just keep that in mind)

-I feel he would have his child out of wedlock, maybe when he was younger out partying things got a little crazy then bam, next thing he knows he has a child with no mom and no idea what to do.

-cAlLs AizAwa 

-No but He’s a great Dad honestly, although he's clueless sometimes, he tends to figures things out fairly quickly

- At first it was really hard for him since he had this baby, a new hero career, and the whole world trashing on him, he totally broke down a few times and wanted to give up. BUt aizawa and his other friends helped him through and encouraged him

-You’re his little sunshine and HE LOVeS yoU tO death

-calls you literally any pet name that is very soft and cute and innocent

-He buys evErything for you, i swear! If you just look at something for more than two seconds, it’s in his cart and he’s buying it for you

-”dad you don-”

-”shh pumpkin, let daddy buy it for you.”

-your room is filled with what every girl wants to have

-He learns to do your hair, no matter the texture or thickness or length, he’ll watch youtube videos and figure it out

-he lets you do his hair as well, braiding it, curling it whatever, he’s totally fine with it. JuSt DoNt CUt iT

-New school year and you need new clothes?? Yeah over 1,000 dollars worth of stuff brought.

-speaking of school, sometimes you get comments and stuff from teachers or students because you might not look like him or because you don’t know who your mom is, ect.

-At first when you were younger, it didn’t hurt you, you couldn’t understand that anyways, but as you started to get older it affected you more and more until one day you came home crying to present, and it literally breaks his heart

-”Daddy, why isn’t my skin as light as yours, and my hair isn’t as thin? The other kids make fun of me for it...it really hurts me. And WHere is mom? Does she not love us? You’re really sweet i don’t know why she doesn’t want to be with you…”

-”why are you asking this?”

-”The kids and teachers at school…”

-RAGE MODE ACTIVATED

-He literally storms down to your school and demands that the questions and comments stop or he’s going to press charges

-Never ever was asked about any of those things again...well, more or less, sometimes you hear teachers or students whispering or makings sly comments but you chose to ignore those things 

-”DONT YOU EVER TALK TO ME OR MY LITTLE CUTIE PIE EVER AGAIN.”

-HUGs!! He hugs you like all the time everyday when he sees you. Like it’s his way it’s saying i love you although he screams that to you all the time

-”Y/N MY LITTLE GIRL,” *jump hugs* “I LOOOOOOOVveevVVEVVEvevV Ee YOuuUUUUUUOoUUUU”

- PROTECCS YOU AT ALL COSTS

-Like when the world found out that he had a kid, and he was still kind of a kid himself with a just starting a career, he kind of got shitted on a whole lot...by everyone and the press is always writing stories and stuff so when you were old enough to read or understand some stuff he’d often keep TV off or keep you away from the press and media although that became harder when you had to go outside and go to school but as much as he can limit that crazy stuff you see, he’ll do it.

-He makes sure you can defend yourself and as soon as you get your quirk, he’s training you. He will never push mega hard however he makes sure that the training is vigorous enough that when danger comes...you’re ready 

-Being a pro hero’s child can mean you’re in a lot of danger, people want to kill or kidnap you to hurt the hero so he’s constantly worries and on you about safety

-If your quirk is similar to his, skskkdnjsk he literally will SCREEEEEEEE, he thinks it’s so awesome you have a quirk like his and he will make sure that the both of you will annoy Aizawa 

-As much as Hizashi spoils you, you had to grow up a whole lot quickly. Even though he’s an underground hero and kinda works on his on time, his job is still quite demanding and he has to be gone a lot so that means you need to learn how to cook, clean, do your homework, etc. on your own so if anything happens (god forbid) you know how to take care of yourself. when you were younger tho he’d have a babysitter/nanny to look and take care of you while he’s at work

-Although when he is home he cooks and does all of that stuff. HE'S A REALLY GOOD COOK??????? Like seriously and don’t let me get started on the pastries he makes...mmmm yummm…

-only burnt down the kitchen once...Don’t tell Aizawa plez ;-;

-He actually feels very very bad about leaving you at home a lot with responsibility, he’s all about fun and really just being a kid so he always apologizes to you and plans something super fun when he’s off of work. Like laser tag, going out for ice cream, or just building forts at home. He makes sure you have a balance

-He might’ve brought you a puppy so you would have a friend, you let him name the puppy and now you have a “Mr.Ruffkins” running around your house

-He let’s you have girls night which is basically just you and him and sometimes a friend, and you guys just paint each other nails, put bows in each others hair, all the girly stuff,  and just talk about anything. 

-It’s his way i guess to make up for the mother-daughter time you don’t have in your life

-Cute picnics at the park with a bunch of snacks and you guys will just feed the little duckies and animals 

-Brings you around his agency or to his radio show all the time, like everyone that works there knows and loves you a whole lot. You even have a mini cute pink desk with a name tag on it.

-You have a little segment on his show called “LittleMic and PresentMic” and you guys just talk about crazy weird stuff and reach out to single Dads who are also raising up kids. It’s super cute i swear.

-Aizawa is your tired uncle that says he hates coming over but he comes over like everyday and eats all your food while watching TV on the couch 

-He’s the best uncle though but he’s super blunt. So sometimes you go to him for advice or just to talk. He adores you though and checks on you while DadMic is at work or something. 

-Aizawa call you “Kiddo” or “littleMic” or just “y/n”

-Present lets you pick out his new tattoos, and one time he let you draw one….now he has a crooked purple butterfly on his arm...it’s all good tho

-Father daughter danceeeeee ya ya ya! You guys bring the moves and the music to the dance floor like get out the mf way swines.

-He picked out your dress and you picked out his suit, he even let you do a little man bun

-sometimes when you guys are just chilling at home, you will play some of your favorite classics, and you will step on his feet and he’ll dance, you guess may have fell like twice.

-speaking of music and dancing, he will turn up all of the pop jams that you love (slipping some of his rock n’ roll faves) THROW candy all through out the house and both of you are dancing in weird costumes while singing

-”I LOOOOOOOOvvEEEE ROcKKK N ROLLLLL SO PUT ANOTHER DIME IN THE JUKE BOX bAE bEEEEEEBHEDB”

-You are very much involved in music and he showed you how to make your own mixtapes, playlists, and how to DJ on your own

-piggy back rideeeesss yuuuuhhhhh. When you’re feeling sad he randomly picks you up, twirls you onto his back and runs around the house yells

-”WOOOOOSSSHHHHHH MEGA JET FLYING A SAD PASSENGER, MOVE OUT OF THE WAY WOOOOOSSHHHSHSH”

-Usually does this until you’re laughing and playing along with him

-”KrrSHH THIS IS FLIGHTER PILOT Y/N WITH MY  TRUSTY JET YAMADA ON MY WAY TO DESTROY THE ENEMY PLANE, ANyoNE copPY?”

-one time you like dressed up like him for halloween and it was lit. hair somehow slicked up, black leather jacket and some headphones...wooo child you looked cool

-”PRESENT MIC MAY I GET YOUR AUTOGRAPH???”

-”nO PapArazzi PleAse”

-I feel as though you’d be bilingual, Japanese and English. I feel at home it’ll lean more towards English although there’s a hint of Japanese in there

-He rarely gets mad at you but if he did, it’s probably because you put yourself in danger or something of that sorts

-If you cannot sleep, he’ll let you sleep with him and he’ll have blue clues playing in the bakground to help “sooth you” (he enjoys that show very much”

-”THE CLUE IS RIGHT THERE BLUEEEE”

-”dad? I-”

-Tells you stories about his high school/early life and gives you advice

-”in conclusion do not throw a pumpkin at a security guard or you might get hurt...okay love bug?”

-The sweetest thing ever, like he randomly makes weird faces or says random things to make you laugh

-Forehead kisses or little cheek kisses

-Twirls you around and says “Ah my little princess looks lovely today”

-OMG TICKLE FIGHTS I SWEAR YOU’RE GASPING FOR AIR SOMEONE HELP YOU BUT LIKE ITS FUN

-You help him choose outfits when he’s indecisive

-”take away the scarf and go with the graphic tee and maybe the black boots instead of the red ones”

-”Look at my child, a fashion Icon.”

-He let you decorate the house so now there’s glitter, pink stuff, rainbows and sparkles all around the house but it’s super cute. 

-Many cute photos of you guys in macaroni picture frames.

-HE TAKES PICTURES OF EVERYTHING LIKE STACKS OF PHOTOS SMHHH TAKE THE CAMERA AWAAAAYYYYY

-Being Present’s Child would be super cute and mega fun. He’s one of the most interactive loving dads out there, you would never feel lost or lonely for a second. Seriously he is the dad that we all wanted/ needed as a kid lmao. 

[druggedupdog]

major tw sorry. this is pretty graphic and long. please like if you read.

chris had it all planned out the moment he started talking to me. i was eleven. it was after school, i was trying to walk home and these kids from my class kept fucking trying to follow me and rile me up because it was apparently funny watching an obviously mentally ill child have a breakdown. and chris just. appears out of nowhere and tells the kids to fuck off and they leave and i INSTANTLY want to be his friend because HOLY SHIT someone actually defended me and i was just so desperate for company and honestly at the time i was already planning to kill myself. and i just. i just tell him everything. that same day, the same day i met this complete stranger, i just start spilling my life story. my dad's an asshole and beats me, my brothers think my pain is funny, no one likes me at school and thinks i'm weird, my mom's fucking dead, i live in a moldy delapidated house with little food because my family is fucking poor, i hate church and i hate school and homework and i just want to get away from my stupid town or die. etc etc etc. and he listens and says he's gonna protect me and stupid fucking me believed him. i set myself up, i don't even know if he knew about all this prior because i thought maybe he stalked me but no i told him everything about my shitty life and he used it for his advantage.

two years later he says i'm old enough to date him. but honestly prior to that it had been maybe a month of me knowing him and he was hugging me a bit too long, smelling my hair and clothes, touching me in suggestive ways, calling me baby names and other nicknames, always talking about how hot i was and how he couldn't wait until i was older and he could fuck me. but what the fuck did i do? absolutely nothing. because i grew up in a sheltered mormon home and didn't know jack shit about sex or love or anything. i just loved the attention he gave me because fuck at least it was "positive" and i felt like such a rebel when he would buy me things i wasn't supposed to have like alcohol and cigarettes and any illegal street drug you can think of. he very easily manipulated me and i fell so fucking hard for it because i have shit for brains. anyway the literal day i turned 13 he basically pushes on me that we're dating now and i was just like "lol haha okay! whatever you say! please don't leave me!" and after school he took me to his "parent's house" while they were "on vacation" because he was very obviously 16 and definitely not lying about it. then he took me to his bedroom, told me we'd play some video games for a while, gave me some alcohol and i got drunk as shit. he kept saying some nonsense about like... how i looked really warm from the booze and i should take my clothes off to be more comfortable. i don't remember it that well. i think i did it really half-assed and he ended up taking my clothes off for me and then he started cuddling with me and touching my dick and i kept trying to push him away but i was too fucking drunk to really do anything and i just. i just kept saying stop. stop please. please please please. and he kept going until he turned me over, pushed my face into the mattress and penetrated me. it hurt so fucking bad and i tried screaming but nothing came out. i started crying and he told me that everything was okay. it was supposed to hurt. i was supposed to be scared. and i still believed him even though every part of me found it hard to believe. i black out from the alcohol and the fear. the next day i'm awake in his bed, covered in his cum, trying to process what the fuck just happened and i'm freaking out but i don't know why because chris loves me and said it was okay so why do i feel like this. why. he made me breakfast and i throw it up when i get to my dad's and he screams at me for being sick and missing school and he asks me where i was and i don't say anything and he beats me. so i go back to chris's house that night to get away and this time chris has heroin for me instead of booze and he rapes me after i shoot up and start nodding off. i find out chris is 19 after looking in his wallet for spare money while he's asleep after getting off. i go back to my dad's house because i'm uncomfortable and i get beat by my dad again. and then i go back to chris's and get raped again. back to my dad's and get beat again. back to chris's and get raped again. the cycle repeats again and again and again. until i'm 16 and my brothers snitch to my dad that i like men and i have a boyfriend and my dad beats the shit out of me, raids my room while my brothers hold me down and force me to watch as he finds candid photos chris took of me nude and getting violated by him as well as all the heroin and other drugs and paraphernalia i had stashed and hidden in my room. he beats the shit out of me AGAIN and starts throwing all of my shit out of my bedroom window and when i run out to grab it all he locks the door behind me and doesn't let me back in. so i go back to chris's house and beg him to let me live with him and he obviously agrees.

so then i get raped for even more months but at this point i'm just conditioned to accept it no matter how much i hate it. then chris starts yelling at me for trivial things. then he threatens me. then he starts hitting me. then he locks me in the moldy spare bedroom with only a dirty old mattress in it whenever we disagree over shit and starves me for days. at this point i'm very deep in my heroin addiction, so he forces me into withdrawal whenever i'm locked up and i am in so much physical anguish. he only comes in to give me my fix and rape me. sometimes he only rapes me and i feel and remember everything so i actually scream during these times and he shoves his fingers in my mouth to shut me up and if i bite down he slaps me. this goes on for two fucking years. but i stay because i need the drugs and i need the love and attention and he really does love me he's just going through a phase he'll apologize and see what he's doing eventually i still see glimpses of it sometimes when he lets me out of the room and cuddles and kisses me and calls me his cute little boy. but then as i approach my 18th birthday i find out he's molesting another 13 year old. i dont do anything. when i'm 18 he tells me he's had enough of my shit and kicks me out. i beg and plead for him to let me stay. i promise him i'll do anything for him i'll let him rape me nonstop all day or murder me if that's what he wants to do. i tell him i love him so much we're meant to be together i want to marry him i want to spend the rest of my life with him and get high all day with him. he tells me he doesn't care. i'm useless to him now because i'm an adult. i'm a pathetic junkie and i was just an experiment because he had a fetish he really wanted to test out and i seemed like a good target. he's already found another child to lust over and torture the same way he did to me.

this post is long and i basically spilled my life story but i dont care i don't anymore i'm going to kill myself. i quit heroin but i regret it so fucking bad EVEN THOUGH IT REMINDS ME OF HIM ITS THE DRUG HE USED TO HURT ME AND TORTURE ME FOR YEARS AND YEARS I WAS TORTURED INA DIRTY ROOM FOR YEARS USED AS HIS CUM RAG. i can't get over it. i abused heroin because i was in so much pain. i didn't want to handle it all it was just too much. i need it again because the memories just keep coming back every time i lay down and close my eyes. i want it to go away i want the pain gone it hurts. it hurts all the time. i hurt everywhere all the time and i can't process it. why. why did he and my dad leave me so broken like this. wouldn't it have been less effort to just kill me? it would hurt me less, actually. it would have been more humane. i wouldn't have to suffer the memories, the nightmares, the panic attacks, the learned behaviors, the harmful coping mechanisms and self-medication, the mental anguish that manifests as intense physical pain, the nonstop crying and bouts of rage that make everyone around me fear me. i can't be normal anymore. i'm just like this now and i never wanted it and i can't be a useful contribution to society. the last actual job i had i lost because a coworker made a rape joke and i beat him over it. i'm some fucking animal i'm not human anymore. i don't want to be this.

so it's either go back to heroin again and possibly lose ethan over it or kill myself and i guess suffer the consequence of death and hurt ethan. those are the options because i can't do this shit anymore, sorry.

[binary-colour]

Falsettos UK time

So I just went to see the UK production of Falsettos last night and kind of wanted to word vomit all my thoughts and key parts of it onto a post so that I can preserve the amazingness in my mind for as long as possible.

Basically, I’ve been obsessed with this show for a while now and it lived up to every expectation possible. The cast were incredible, the singing was outstanding and my mum sobbed solidly through the second act.

FYI - we had the male cover Matthew McKenna as Whizzer (I was a bit worried at first but he was incredible)

This is v v long so read at own risk ig. Also, spoilers!

Four Jews was portraying Jason’s birth (like, the ‘slavery’ was Trina going into labour). It worked really well actually, especially for people who had no idea what the show was about (ie 90% of the audience lmao) It was also Trina in it more than Jason, but there was this hilarious bit when they did the ‘I’m Mendel!’ etc. section and Trina went ‘I’m-‘ and got cut off Also Whizzer piggybacked Jason, my heart

Tight Knit Family - as you’d expect I guess, Daniel’s voice was 👌 Also Marvin did ‘friend’ in airquotes and Whizzer did this mega eye roll lmao

Love is Blind - I guess there wasn’t much else different, just that they all stood in the photo frames when Trina sung about them which was a v nice touch ¯\_(ツ)_/

Thrill of First Love - Whizzer was,, a lot more argumentative than I expected I guess? Like, almost a bit aggressive? But overall it was great, they were so snarky and less sexual than the revival (which my asexual ass didn’t mind) apart from one reaaaach. They also had v good chemistry to say it wasn’t Oliver performing.

Marvin At The Psychiatrist - the staging was pretty similar to revival. Whizzer was watching from the top and he made all these offended faces when Marvin and Mendel were talking about him (when they said he was ‘smarmy’ he did this Offended Gay expression it was great). Then Trina started unbuttoning her shirt in Pt. 2 and Mendel got really flustered, it was wild. Everyone was dying from laughter. Also, ‘it’s queer Mr Marvin… sorry, it’s strange Mr Marvin’ deserves its own shoutout

My Father’s A Homo/Everyone Tells Jason to See A Psychiatrist - Elliot is a star, what more can I say. His voice is soo good as well. When Whizzer arrived Trina and him did this 😒 face at each other.

I’m Breaking Down - I thought no-one could come close to Stephanie’s iconic performance in the revival, but Laura rocked it. She was setting the table for Mendel coming, and it had this mega chaotic energy where she threw the bananas around and screamed ‘shIT’ when they fell onto the floor. For the ‘fulfill his needs’ bit she really aggressively ripped the top of the banana off and peeled it lmao. Also, she was drinking from the wine bottle for one of the choruses and humming, it was amazing. 

Jason’s Therapy - Jason was definitely the most mature one in this scene haha. After Mendel did his first dance sequence, Jason just put a hand on his shoulder to stop him and sighed before he said the ‘is this therapy?’ bit.  Marvin and Trina sat drinking at the side of the stage the whole time lmao. When it was the second ‘is this therapy?’ line, they both held up their glasses for the ‘yES!’. Also, for the final bit Marvin, Trina and Whizzer all came on singing into glasses and slapping their legs with plates lmao.

Marriage proposal - I saw a few people saying that this was a bit ~creepy~ rather than cute, and I guess I see what they mean? But they didn’t do the weird vampire wrist grab like the revival, so I guess that’s a plus. Trina was very confused the whole time, bless her, and for the ‘start to cry’ she was like ‘I’m not??’ and then Mendel starting blubbering. Plus, Jason sang the ‘biblical times?’ first one rather than Trina, and Marvin did this Super Sassy ‘bIbLiCaL tImEs’ that was hilarious.

Trina’s Song/March of the Falsettos - This was staged as a nightmare sequence, which brought some sense to the madness of MoTF. Like, when she woke up she continued with the song, it worked really well. I also really liked that they reenacted the wedding scene from 4 Jews as part of it, it really showed Trina’s fear that something bad would happen again.

The Chess Game - Wow, this was... intense. Whizzer was super snarky, so Marvin got mad at him pretty quickly. It was so funny though, especially when it was Whizzer saying the ‘move a pawn’ bit and he sat in his chair like Marvin and acted all stern. Marvin was drinking solidly, so when Whizzer ‘won’ and knocked over a ton of pieces he lobbed the board off stage and hit a few things. Whizzer backed off pretty quick looking scared and Marvin was apologetic until the ‘Whizzer’s supposed to make the dinner’ bit, when he got Whizzer’s suitcase and packed it for him on stage before throwing it at him.  Also, the ‘this had better come to a stop’ was targeted at the liquor bottle.

Making a home – Mendel came on with only a house plant and it got kicked out of the house anyway lmao I relate. The dog bit Jason’s chessboard rip.

The Games I Play – this was performed so well my mum almost cried. It was much softer than any other version I’ve heard and more… spoken? But the notes at the end were belted and spot on, but he still had the slight tremor like he was tearing up. Your heart really went out for Whizzer, especially as the Motel projected on the screens on his side were mirrored by the homely ones on the other.

Marvin Hits Trina – Marvin didn’t tear up the invitation but he did hit a lot of stuff. Mendel also seemed a lot less angry at him when Marvin first came in then the revival – I guess Marvin was somewhat drunk in this. He also looked MAD at Whizzer whenever he sang his bits, apart from when Whizzer chokes up a bit when he says he doesn’t love him, and you see Marvin falter a bit then before he shouts at everyone. The lights went red when he hit Trina, which really added to the effect (although they were a bit late whoops)

I Never Wanted to Love You – Jason was crying and hugging Trina after Marvin hit her, and Mendel came and surrounded them in this big ~protective dad~ way. Marvin looked genuinely sorry as well, which was nice I guess.

Father to Son – The staging of this was really simple – they were just sat on the floor centre stage face-to-face. But it was so heartfelt, and Marvin looked like he was going to cry for most of it. And at first, Jason was a bit hesitant to hug him after what happened before, but you could see how relieved Marvin was when he did.

Falsettoland – Mendel pointed at the audience for the ‘homosexuals’ and ‘mother with children’ lmao. The tiny band was the wedding ring too. Whizzer was introduced back on with ‘homosexual’ and he did this offended ‘really’ gesture it was great. No Nancy Reagan punchbag unfortunately, but the lesbians came on holding signs saying Love Is Love <3. Marvin and Trina seemed a lot more friendly in this too, which was a nice touch!

Year of the Child – Mendel was Too Scared to really disrupt the arguments haha. Trina was fierce, Marvin suggested the caterers really sheepishly and she basically bit his head off it was hilarious. And when the lesbians arrived with the food, she literally said off-mic ‘you’ve got to be kidding me’ to Marvin. At the end, Jason ran off because they were all too ~excited~ and the last part of the song was spent looking for him lmao.

Miracle of Judaism – ‘Jo… what’s the name of that bitch?’ im dead

Baseball Game – Jason had a pretty good swing before Whizzer even arrived to be honest. The lesbians fully got up and yelled at the umpire it was great. Mendel got up to sing his bit, and Marvin and Trina just sort of led him to sit back down and apologised offstage. Whizzer kept teasing Marvin back about the hairline comments, and Marvin just mournfully rubbed his head like ‘I know.’ It was hilarious.

A Day in Falsettoland – Charlotte and Cordelia were the patients and they were both amazing. Mendel wasn’t even sorry about the name. Charlotte literally spat the food back onto Cordelia’s plate, she didn’t even hide it lmao. ‘Maybe in a mile I’ll be okay.’ ‘a mILE?’ Same Mendel. Also, Trina runs with weights? Raquetball worked really well to say there was such little space on stage. It was nice to see the softer side to Marvin and Whizzer’s relationship, the occasional kisses throughout the game.

Everyone Hates His Parents – it was pretty similar to the revival, except Mendel and Jason both did a mega cartwheel?! I was shocked, it was perfect. Also, Trina cried ‘you’re killing me!’ to Jason after he said he didn’t want the bar mitzvah, which made the ‘kill you mother’ verse a bit more understandable lmao. Also, Trina kept giving Marvin these ‘seriously?’ looks during that whole song.

What More Can I Say - this was so sweet, so Domestic. Marvin was like this happy puppy. Whizzer basically fell asleep reading, and Marvin was taking his glasses off and putting the book aside, it was v sweet

Something Bad is Happening - lovely singing from the lesbians, extra runs! They were So Good together. When Whizzer collapsed (it was a proper keel over too), Marvin lifted his head and shoulders into lap and sang it straight to him. It was v sweet and sad, Whizzer was crying and apologising to him :’(

Holding to the Ground - this is such a beautiful song, and Laura sounded incredible. They were setting up the set behind her, but there were sirens and a heart monitor came on when they helped Whizzer into the hospital bed.

Days like this - Marvin brought this awful cheesy card, and Whizzer just held it up to the audience like ‘what’. But he kept reading the on Trina and Mendel brought and showing it to Marvin. The Whizzer/Trina solidarity was v sweet, he kissed her cheek and things when they arrived.

Cancelling the Bar Mitzvah - Jason started properly crying into Trina who cried as well. It was so raw and emotional, you really felt their fear for what is happening. My only qualm was that they cut part out?? It’s one of my favourite lines, when Mendel sings the ‘becoming a man’ bit :s

Four Unlikely Lovers - now this was heartbreaking. Marvin went and cried at the end of the hospital bed at the beginning, and he sobbed at Whizzer’s ‘our bed’. They were really sweet though, always kissing foreheads or holding hands and things - I don’t think they let go all song. Cordelia and Charlotte also came in holding hands <3

Side note! Whizzer seemed in a lot more pain in this!! Which made me really sad 

Something Bad (reprise) - Jason was watching Charlotte sing it instead of Marvin, I guess it was almost like her preparing him for what was going to happen to his Dad too?!

You Gotta Die Sometime - this was sooo well sung, it was pretty soft and then he started breaking down at end instead of belting the note :’’( Until Jason came in and he was like ‘um where’s your parents??’

Jason’s Bar Mitzvah - it had such a nice tight-knit ( ;) ) feeling to it which was really bittersweet. Mendel came in hiding balloons v unsuccessfully behind his back. The took the photo again, which was great (although not bitter they didn’t use the camera effect in that for the line in Everyone Tells Jason to See A Psychiatrist or anything). When Jason sung the prayer, he waved away the book and stood on table v proud. Then Jason sort of beckoned Whizzer over, which made him collapse onto the floor and Jason was taken off screaming for him. It was heartbreaking.

What Would I Do - the one that finally broke me. It was so so sad, Whizzer was still alive collapsed in bed so they sung it to each other and held held hands until he flatlined at end. On stage. My God.

At the end, the rest of the family all crowded around the bed and surrounded Marvin (who was properly sobbing). Mendel blew the candle that had been lit for the Bar Mitzvah out, and the photo they took came up on screen.

So, conclusion, see this show NOW before it ends its ridiculously short run. Honestly. You won’t regret a penny.

[hypnosis-micrpohone-things]

Fling Posse vs. S/O Hypmic Battle!

Not going to directly answer this because it was submitted anonymously, but they put their blog name in. But, you know who you are! (And thanks so much!) The question is:

“It's nice to see a new Hypmic blog! Although I run one myself, I'd like to request some headcanons for how Fling Posse would react to their S/o and them having a Hypmic battle, calling a truce because neither of them holding up very well; shortly after, their S/o collapses as they're stubborn and wanted to hang on until they won, taking each hit and acting fine even though they're at their limit? And if you'd like a promo or boost, just give me a shout!!! Thanks!”

Ramuda

He is not the type to hold back in either a real or practice battle, even if it’s against his s/o.

I also can’t see Ramuda falling for anyone that couldn’t match him 1 for 1 (in battle, careers, the bedroom, etc).

So you know this is going to be one heck of a fight.

I’m going to assume this is a private battle, like a hardcore practice.

They are somewhere away from other people, but not necessarily private, you know? Like, an empty practice studio or something.

But that doesn’t mean people can’t hear them, oh no. The walls are shaking with the force of their attacks. You can bet anyone in the vicinity can hear them loud and clear.

And it’s a struggle for both of them.

Ramuda and his s/o know each other very well. Too well.

Both are able to use what they know about the other to hit where it hurts.

Although, it’s hurting a bit more on one side than the other.

While his s/o has some good attacks, it’s not enough. Ramuda is a very secretive and hard to read man. It’s likely that even someone he loves very much won’t know as much about him as he does them.

This fight, though...he’s starting to second guess all that. I mean, his s/o is standing there seemingly unfazed for crying out loud! And those attacks are starting to really hurt...

He would feign boredom and say he was tired of it. He’d call the truce, though not before promising to beat them next time!

As as soon has he does his s/o collapses.

No warning, no visible symptoms, just the horrifying thud of a body hitting the floor.

He’d be in shock for about 1 second before his cutesy facade fades.

He finds his inner super strength to pick them up and rush them out of there immediately. And, of course, he goes straight to Jakurai.

When the good doc patches his s/o up and tells Ramuda they’ll be fine, the fury sets in for him.

Why would they pretend like nothing was wrong? Why wouldn’t s/o tell him to stop? Of course, he knows them well enough to know why.

Jakurai wouldn’t let him in to see his s/o until he’s calmed down. When he finally is allowed in he is still in serious Ramuda mode, deep voice and all.

He’d tell his s/o that while he admires their strength and resolve, they should never do that again.

He doesn’t want to seriously hurt them. And he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he ended up doing something worse.

Even if his s/o is reluctant to agree, he will make them. Once they have, cute Ramuda returns to dote on his s/o as they recover.

Gentaro

This would most definitely be a private battle. A way to test both of their strength without seriously endangering themselves.

Or so they think.

I think Gentaro would have an s/o who is quite intelligent, or at least highly literate.

This leads to some...interesting...and highly accurate and effective attacks.

I mean, is there one word for throwing someone or something out of a window? Yes. It’s defenestration. And you bet it was used by one of them.

(Also, don’t ask how I know that...)

Wherever the battle is, the building is structurally sound and everything is intact. Passerby probably don’t even know what’s going on.

But the two of them are a freaking wreck.

Their ears are ringing, their clothes are torn, their legs are shaking, they can barely breathe anymore.

And Gentaro’s saving grace is his habit of lying.

I don’t think he would be completely honest with his s/o. Not for a very long time.

I also don’t think it’s a conscious decision, though. It’s become habit, it’s natural.

And trying to use those lies against him doesn’t hurt him because they’re not true. But his s/o does know him well enough to get a bunch of good blows in.

He would call it off when he could tell the both of them were on the brink of collapse.

Both would heave a sigh of relief. Then he would see his s/o start to topple forward.

He would do his best to catch them, but it’s unlikely in his state.

He’d panic as they hit the floor, then immediately find a phone to call an ambulance.

They’d both be treated for their injuries, but s/o would have to stay overnight.

Gentaro wouldn’t leave. He’d go to your room and wait for you to wake up, if you weren’t already awake.

Then he’d apologize and ask suggest the two of them not do that again. At least for a while.

Dice

Impromptu street battle!

Seriously, he’d just suggest it out of the blue, stopping right in the middle of the sidewalk while grabbing his hypmic.

And of course his s/o would have to oblige!

It would be a fierce, firey battle with a lot of bystanders watching and cheering them on.

Naturally they’d be taking bets as well...Dice has a lot of unsavory interesting gambling friends who would jump at this opportunity.

Unlike the other two, Dice doesn’t hide much of his life or personality from people.

This gives his s/o a lot of material to work with. They hit him with great attacks that send him reeling, causing his friends to get quite nervous (because of course they bet on him...well, most of them).

But...he’s just so damn lucky.

Even in his beat up state he’s somehow able to hit his s/o with some powerful attacks.

It goes on so long that both end up on their knees, barely able to get a word out anymore.

A bystander - who had somehow become a referee of sorts - called out a draw. The echoes of a mob of angry gamblers can still be heard on that street today.

Dice wouldn’t notice his s/o collapse at first as he would be too caught up in the hype of the moment.

It would be a spectator screaming for someone to call an ambulance that would grab his attention.

He would rush over immediately and hold them close, shaking them slightly, yelling for them to wake up, to open their eyes.

An ambulance would show up a few minutes later and take them both to the hospital. The EMTs would learn from the spectators that the two are a couple, so the hospital staff would put them in the same room overnight.

He’d wake up first, trying to move, to walk over to the other bed, but he’s in too much pain.

So, instead, he would watch his s/o carefully until they finally woke up.

When they finally come to he would apologize profusely and promise on his 9 lives that he would never hurt them like that again.

His s/o would just laugh it off, though, and just tell him to focus on recovering.

He bet he could heal faster.

[sweetpxsin]

Stray Kids As Fanboys

Request:  @sy-zygy-zacker

Member: Strays Kids

Plot: Can I please have a Stray Kids scenarios where the roles are switched and you’re an idol while the members are your fanboys?

Genre: fluff

Note: should I make another one where they’re idols yet a fan of you and is your significant other? Also I made them friends in this dog if they’re mentioned in each other’s that’s why

[ Masterlist ]

[ C H A N ]

•Sorry did you hear something?

•oh wait that was Chan already arranging a cover of your newest song

•this boy is a dedicated coverist and some day hopes you’ll notice one of them

•and when you do he will actually die no lie

•other fans will probably demand a collab tbh

•but he’s also a really soft stan, that stays up just to watch your lives

•like sleep who? My ulti is calling me

•would rather go to a fan meeting and have a casual conversation with you

•but still would get lit at a concert if he had the chance to go

•gets flustered and soft when other fans ship him with you or say how they believe he has the talent to collab with you

•if he goes live on Instagram he can go on and on about how much admires you and your talent

•probably also as your music playing has background music 25/8

[ W O O J I N ]

•a real chill and lowkey fan that everyone can get along with

•and is also that one fan you can’t tell is a fan until you look into his phone

•or hear him singing one of your songs

•but he’ll post him singing one of your songs ever once and while on his instagram

•isn’t really keen on collecting albums only the ones he really likes

•and he keeps them safe and sound far from the little monsters *cough* maknae line *cough*

•probably also is the type to get decent seats at the concert like not VIP but also not the far way seats

•truly admires your talent and is probably the main reason why he stans

•but also cause he’s a whole ass hoe for you but you didn't hear that from me

•like not to be nsfw but just cause he’s a lowkey stan doesn’t mean he doesn’t rant about how much he wants to hold your hand and cuddle with you

•and if he does feel like going to a fan meet he’s totally the soft most sweetest stan

[ M I N H O ]

•I don’t know what it is about him that makes me believe he’d end up being your backup dancer (note the sarcasm)

•like he went from being a bts back up dancer to being one of your backup dancers

•and even though he tries not to show it half of the time he got heart eyes for you

•but it never gets weird because you both know how to joke around

•and mostly because you can count on walking in on him dancing’s to your dances but crackhead ver.

•uwu’s everytime you give him a signed album or when you want to take a picture with him for your instagram

•Literally that one fan everyone wishes they could be

•probably posts some shit like “Dreaming to take a pic with your fav, can’t relate”

•he doesn’t even need tickets to your concerts dafuq

•might visit you during fansigns because he missed you

•d*spatch is also ultimately confused with his relation with you

[ C H A N G B I N  ]

•super soft stan but will have absolutely no problem clowning on some of your wardrobe decisions

•probably calls you dumb but only cause he loves you

•occasionally has soft hours for you

•and when he does he goes off sis, like a whole as spam story with paragraphs about how much he adores you

•”I am: devastated they’re so cute” to “why do I stan an idiot”

•is super shy and awkward during fan meets and might just use his aegyo voice on accident

•blushes so hard when you hold his hand

•and can barely answer your questions he’s so captivated

•still claims he’s a hard stan

•is also probably that one stan that performs your songs with a hairbrush in his bedroom or bathroom

•also isn’t too crazy about merch so if he really wants an album he’s gonna buy it

•otherwise he’s really saving for those VIP tickets bro

[ H Y U N J I N ]

•another pretty chill fan but it’s a bit more obvious that he’s a fan

•only because all his friends know he’s basically in love you

•one mention of your name, or look at you and he’s a shy boi uwu

•will probably get caught staring at you during a concert or fan meet with just a huge smile on his face

•and if you ask if he’s shy during a fan meet because he’s not saying anything, and make eye contact with him, he will look away shyly and freeze (y’all know how jinyoung caught his fanboy stare yeah like that)

•his friends laugh at his “misery” which is basically him uwuing at how soft, talented, rude, etc, you are

•tries to hoe around but somehow always gets pulled back to you for being his ulti

•but that’s okay because he’s the absolute softest for you

•hides his stack of merch in his closet because he doesn’t want to admit he has a problem

•probably knows all your dances and if theres back up dancers he’s gonna learn they’re part

•cause you never know man life might just be fair 

•lowkey dreams of dancing next to you one day

[ J I S U N G ]

•that one fan that yells at everyone to shut up when you have a comeback

•will actually scream, cry and go through a rollercoaster of emotion only to tweet “my wig is snatched”

•it’s hard to tell if he’s a soft stan or a hard stan

•but you’re the reason for his lack of sleep, sudden drop in grades and poorness

•that one fan that’s scream crying the lyrics during a concert

•and will probably act like nothing happened afterwards

•usually the one fan screaming in your comment section

•but then tries to act cool and chic during a fan sign but is just shy

•even though he’s a lot softer for you than he’d like to admit

•dies a little in happiness when you touch his hand and won’t wash it till Chan forces him oops won’t wash it till Chan forces him oops 

•probably owns more than just your official merch

•that one fan that will literally throw money at your management

•if he’s home alone you can bet he’s jamming out to your songs probably breaking his back

[ F E L I X ]

•he’s the one that makes meme/crack videos of you

•it’s his job to catch every one of your meme faces

•but that’s the reason why he stans and loves you even more

•besides the fact he could totally go on about why he loves, stans and appreciates your goofy ass he really likes your music

•and is probably that one fan that captions his instagram story with “don’t touch me” over a picture of him staring off into the distance when you have a comeback

•he’s not really afraid to admit that you inspire him and that he’s totally in love with you

•if he ever had the chance to go to a fan meet he’d be  super soft and smiley the whole time

•probably might even give you a small plushie that has one of your meme faces on it

•giggles like a little school girl if you hold his hand

OH or if you mention how much you love his freckles uwu

•either way you’re both whipped for each other after it

[ S E U N G M I N ]

•makes it a know fact that he knows all your songs, eras and dances

•that one bis that will correct fans and starts it with an “actually…”

•really though he’s a soft stan that’s just trying to make covers for his fave

•but if a hater tries some shit he’ll cut a bitch

•still a really cute and shy fan tho

•he gets really excited when he meets other fans of you

•doesn’t wanna admit he probably fanboys more than he’d like to

•stutters when he sees you during a fan meet because wow your so kind and funny

•is a little too shy to have soft hours on his instagram story but when he does it’s the purest most fluffiest

•probably owns all of your albums digitally and physically

•and super proud about it but literally no one is allowed to touch them 

•not even woojin

[ J E O N G I N ]

•the softest stan everyone wishes they are

•is the type of fan to post a fan picture of you on his story admiring how pretty/handsome and soft you are uwu

•and probably gets shipped with you because of it

•isn’t really that crazy for merch but might treat himself with an album or two

•if he ever got the chance to go to a fan meet he’d probably get you a cute little plushie in hopes you can keep it

•also gets really shy and can't stop smiling because he can’t believe he’s meeting his fave

•is a caring little bean and will ask if you ate or rested well •you might as well just be whipped because he’s just so cute

•might post small covers of your songs on his social

•if he’s at a concert all he’s either hyped asf or admiring you

•honestly the purest stan you could ask for

[caitlinsnow-yayyy]

Why Him? (a kwami swap story)

Very overdue story for my friend @nerdasaurus1200 - a King Monkey and Ryuko kwami swap story! You can probably imagine chaos will ensue from these two swapping... and maybe, a new friendship? 

We shall see! I hope anyone reading this enjoys it :) And Nerd, my friend, I hope this was worth the wait! :D Sorry this took so long lol.

(story under the cut)

Oh, of all the people, why Kim?

Today, Adrien and Marinette had decided that the team wasn't working well enough together, and they decided to have a set apart Saturday for a mandatory team bonding exercise - kwami swapping. Chloe got Alix, Max got Nathaniel, Marc switched with Juleka, Ivan swapped with Rose, who then swapped with Mylene; Alya swapped with Nino, and her own boyfriend, Luka, got to swap with Sabrina. Marinette and Adrien swapped (of course).

Their only instructions were to not leave their partner for the day; they didn't even need to seek out an akuma. They could literally go shopping if they wanted to, so long as they stood together.

And she... had gotten Kim.

"You promise to bring that back in one piece, right?" Kim asked, pointing to his circlet.

Kagami gave him a dead stare. "I should ask you the same for my choker."

"Oh, it'll be fine!" Kim smirked. "This is Le Chien Kim ya got here! Not a klutz."

Kagami, again, deadpanned him. Were these words seriously coming out of his mouth right now? Honestly, of all the people she could've gotten, why KIM?! Kim with the Dragon Miraculous just sounded like an accident waiting to happen.

She just didn't feel like throwing a rubber banana today either.

As if examples of how the others days were going couldn't get shoved in her face any more than what her mind was already doing, Nathaniel, equipped with Voyage, Naruto-ran through two portals about two rooftops away from them. Max, equipped with the Fire Flame power, was chasing him with a crossbow that had a flaming arrow. Somehow they were laughing.

"Let's just get this over with," Kagami sighed. "You go first."

"Sweet!" Kim said. "Alright, LONGG - BRING THE STORM!"

She would be lying if she said the Dragon costume didn't fit well on Kim - his suit was a darker red than hers, and his hair that normally stuck up was now covered with a horn-like design for a mask. Honestly, it kinda looked like Dark Cupid. He had wings imprinted into the spandex on his back, and his sword fell into his hands.

Why was she so scared of this?

"Oh, this is so cool!" he exclaimed. "I shall be known as... Doragon Kaosu!"

"Chaos Dragon - fitting," Kagami nodded. "Alright... guess its my turn. XUPPU, SHOWTIME!"

Kagami had already decided her name was going to be Queen Monkey; she saw no need to be original with her name. After all, it wasn't like she was gonna be the Monkey wielder for long. She was just eager for 6 o'clock to roll around so this could be over with.

"Holy crap," Doragon said once her transformation was up, "you look badass!"

Kagami had to smile at that one - despite the fact that Kim was an idiot, he still had his moments, and was really just a fun-loving soul at heart. No one could deny that. "Thank you, Doragon. Now, wanna take your Miraculous for a test run?"

Suddenly, an akuma flew past - he was some sort of hang-gliding akuma, yelling at the top of his lungs about how hang-gliding school was real and not a joke.

"Oh, oh this is perfect!" Doragon laughed. "I've always wanted to do this..."

"Wait, what are you-"

"LIGHTNING DRAGON!"

Doragon suddenly turned into a lightning bolt, and struck the hang-gliding akuma man out of the sky. Queen Monkey screamed out bloody murder in horror, fearing for her sake and for her life that Kim hadn't even been Doragon Kaosu for two minutes and he had already killed someone!

"KIM!" yelled Queen Monkey. "WHAT THE HELL?!"

"Chill, he's fine!" said Doragon, manifesting back in front of her. "I made sure to check his pulse before I got back. He'll live."

"YEAH, FOR LIKE ANOTHER MINUTE!" Queen Monkey screamed. "OH MY GOD!"

"Chill out, Queenie!" Doragon said, genuinely becoming concerned for her. "Its gonna be fine!"

"Woah, what's going on here?"

Kagami and Kim looked up, and there was another kwami swap duo: Luka, now Blue Heeler, and Sabrina, now Hydra. "Gami? Kim? You two okay?" asked Heeler.

"I just struck somebody with lightning, and Queenie over here thinks it'll kill him," Doragon said, somehow completely nonchalant that he had just struck down someone with lightning.

"O..Oh... y-yeah, that'll do it," Heeler muttered, taking a deep breath.

"Should I use Second Chance?" asked Hydra.

"N-No... I think its probably best we leave you two to work this out," Heeler said.

"Wait!" Queen Monkey whispered to him. "P-Please... I-I don't know if I can handle this..."

"Hey, you're gonna do just fine," Heeler reassured her. "It'll probably take some getting used to, but-"

"I-Its not that," Queen Monkey said softly. "I-Its...w-well... he's an idiot."

"You don't know that," Heeler said gently. "Reckless? Probably. Chaotic? You bet! But give him a chance, okay? Please?"

Kagami looked up at Luka... damn those soft eyes. It always made her crack and she hated it! Well, okay, no, she didn't hate it. But she just wished... oh, never mind.

"Fine," she crumbled.

"Thank you so much, Gami," smiled Heeler. "Seriously. Thank you."

"M-hmm," Queen Monkey nodded, trying to appear as sincere as possible. Truth be told, she was still dreading the rest of the day. Hydra and Doragon then wrapped up whatever they were chatting about, and then Sabrina ran off with Luka to go continue their own kwami-swap adventure.

And thank the Lord, the paramedics arrived to take the hang-glider akuma guy away for proper treatment...

-0-

4:00

Oh, just one more hour... one more!

And then, she would have Longg back, and Kim would be back with Xuppu. Like it should be. She was excited to finally get back to normal...

"Hey, Kagami?"

"Hmm?"

The two were currently resting on a rooftop, having just caught another akuma in the trusty akuma-catching portable butterfly nets that they had been supplied with. How they worked was beyond them, but hey, they worked; hopefully Mister Bug didn't mind a surplus of akumas to purify.

"Do you... do you hate me?" Doragon asked.

"What? No no, no!" Queen Monkey said, sitting upright. "Of course not!"

"Are you sure?" he asked, seeming... genuinely troubled. "You sure do act like it."

"No no, God no! I don't hate you, Kim!" Queen Monkey said. "Its just... its..."

"Hmm?" Doragon asked, looking down.

"I'M JEALOUS! I'm jealous, okay?! That's it!" she blurted out. "Its just... you're able to be so reckless and chaotic all the time! And yet, somehow, you can... I don't know, control the chaos? I wish I could do that, for crying out loud! I've always had to be perfect, nothing could be off! Being Queen Monkey has given me a sweet release, and I've really enjoyed it, and you make an excellent Dragon wielder but my pride wouldn't let me admit it! There! Are you happy?"

Queen Monkey then took in deep breaths of air, never having vented like that before... it was new.

And honestly, it felt good to get that off of her chest.

Suddenly, Doragon put a hand on her shoulder, and smiled sadly.

"Wanna know something?" Doragon said. "I'm... I'm kinda jealous of you too."

"Huh?" Queen Monkey said in shock.

"You're able to create a plan on the fly, and you never have to just wing it," Doragon said. "Not only that, but you can be picture perfect when needed. I'm always this big mess of chaos, never really able to control anything but. Though I do wish, at times, that I could be a straight shooter; like you! So yeah, I'm kinda jealous of you too..."

Queen Monkey chuckled. "Well then... uhm..."

"Don't know what to say?" asked Doragon.

"Read my mind," nodded Queen Monkey. "Uh... so... I guess, uh, we're even? Of sorts?"

Doragon shrugged. "Guess so... but really, I'm glad you don't hate me."

"God, how could I hate you?" asked Queen Monkey. "Honestly, though at times, you are a moron - its hilarious. You're hilarious. I'm not only jealous of your ability to control chaos, but your sense of humor is so natural flowing and witty - I could never do that! That's a gift!"

"You kidding me? Of course you could!" Doragon laughed. "And your stoicism... the ability to keep a stone cold glare going for more than five seconds. I'm envious of that, because I know I couldn't do that for shite!"

"Oh come on, you could!" Queen Monkey exclaimed. "See, the trick is to..."

The two wouldn't count on it, but they'd spend the next hour chatting and talking like they were best friends. They'd talk similarities, their differences, what was going on in their romantic lives, how they thought of their powers on the norm, etc.

After the conversation, honestly, the two honestly weren't even ready to swap back when Mister Bug sent out the signal for them to come back.

-0-

"So, how was that day, guys?" asked Mister Bug to the currently present heroes. Lady Noire still had her arm hooked around his; those two were madly in love. It was almost sickeningly cute.

"SO MUCH FUN!" Tourterelle (turtle!Alya) exclaimed.

"Yeah, this was a sick day!" Red Vix (fox!Nino) added.

"AWESOME!" Sun Screamer (rooster!Max) yelled.

"I had so much fun!" Trotter (horse!Nath) exclaimed. "This may actually be the best team bonding exercise idea ever! Thanks you two!"

"Honestly, we didn't get much action," Mr. Stripes (tiger!Marc) chuckled.

"I mean, I guess I learned how to tap dance," Madame Hoofer (goat!Juleka) shrugged with a smile (she failed to notice Rose's sudden blush). "Just what happens when ya get bored, y'know?"

"Its difficult to be intimidating like this," Pink Boar (pig!Ivan) said sadly.

"Oh, you're always a sweetheart to me!" Bluebell (ox!Mylene) smiled up at her boyfriend.

"So cute!" Mouselia (mouse!Rose) said, holding her hands together.

"We had a lot of fun," Blue Heeler (dog!Luka) smiled.

"Yeah, it was actually pretty fun using Repetition as a power!" Hydra (snake!Sabrina) said, equally as happy.

"Psh... It was okay, I guess," Madame Cottontail (bunny!Chloe) shrugged.

"Oh come on, you loved it!" Hornet (bee!Alix) said, smirking smugly.

"Well, we're glad you all had fun!" Lady Noire smiled. "Uh... Kim? Kagami? How'd you all fare?"

There was tension - everyone could feel it. A commonly shared feeling of dread was shared at the start of the day when it was announced that Kim and Kagami would be swapping Miraculouses... but everyone was caught off guard by the two nodding and smirking at one another.

"When can we do it again?" the two asked.

"O-Oh!" Lady Noire gasped, not expecting that answer. "W-Well... uhm, we hadn't thought of doing this again!"

"But, m'lady, you do have to agree - this has been a very successful day," Mister Bug said.

"You're very right, my bug," smiled Lady Noire, nodding. "Well... how about not next Saturday, but the Saturday after? Same swaps? Everyone cool with that?"

A simultaneous nod went around the group, and Lady Noire and Mister Bug settled it - every other Saturday would henceforth be known as "Kwami Swap Day".

"Pound it?" asked Doragon, sticking out his fist.

Queen Monkey nodded, returning the bump. "Pound it."

It hadn't been expected, no, but it wasn't any less welcome because of that.

This friendship would be one for the ages, for sure...

[natsspammityspamspamham]

Dino Rant (Nov 27 + Other Side Tales)

My siblings are currently mad at me. Here’s what went down. Tagging: @akaskira​ @ce-la​ @caratheillustrious​ Who are all practically my spiritual online older sister/sage advice givers and @lizard-in-the-rain​ who can be an idiot along with me.

For context:  Ate = Sister Kuya = Brother * My dad and I have a rocky past because he’s very old-fashioned, hasn’t been always supportive about my mental health, and is really old and out of date (especially about LGBTQ, feminism, HK protests, etc.) * My sister also has a rocky past with me but has since calmed down a little thanks to old age (she’s 23) * My brother is constantly busy with school (and stressed), is still mourning his breakup after a few months which continues to salt his wounds (not because his ex is crappy but she’s really nice. He’s having a bit of trouble still.), and is a very sensitive person (more sensitive than my sister)

Further in, you can see what happened at the orchestra concert on Saturday. For context, you can check out a previous rant.

Me: Dad got some bad oil burns. I was in the family room as he was yelling “[MOM NAME x 3] WHAT DO I DO WITH OIL BURNS?” Mom was upstairs and didn’t hear They are kinda big He’s upset

Ate: What the why didn't you help him call mom???? did you??? yike oil burns are no joke bc they hurt for longer bc water just steams away but oil sticks and keeps burning and the scars are worse

Me: Uh... I was scrolling on tumblr? I don’t know. I thought he already put ice.

Ate: smh

Me: But looking back, I heard the water running for less than a minute.

Ate: LOL

Me: And never heard the freezer open

Ate: water won't help unless you use soap anyways

Me: So I thought he did that but he was really just yelling for mom He didn’t even ice it. He said he ran some water over it.

Ate: make sure you help if someone yells for help next time even if you think it's handled bc if a person is panicking/in pain they're likely not thinking straight to help themselves speaking from experience

Me: Mom tried to give him advice now and he just walked away going “uh huh”

Ate: even I know to put my hand under cold running water and ice it but I've definitely not done that when I've burnt myself before I would be pretty choked too if there were 2 other people in the house and neither of them came to help me when I got oil burns

Me: Mom was upstairs and couldn’t hear. I thought he was crying wolf as usual.He yells for mom around three times on a daily basis

Ate: fair but fr next time take the 5 seconds to check bc sometimes bad things happenesp if all you hear is a thud

Me: “[Mom Name x 3 again] I CANT FIND THE [blank]!!!” Mom: it’s been in the same spot for over a decade. Look with your eyes.

Me: Mom does that once every other day (has a big thud) usually because something broke. When I heard the yell this time, I thought it was because he knocked something over. Dad is always yelling He even asked mom how to make the rice And didn’t make it because she didn’t answer fast enough Dad is a drama queen. That’s where we all get it from.

Ate: I mean

Kuya: Tf is this situation How can you ignore someone in need of help Regardless of who it is Doesn't it hurt to see someone suffering

Me: I didn’t see anything

Kuya: Unless you hold extreme animosity Like they killed your mom or something I have to hand something in by 10 But I find this quite upsetting

Me: I didn’t see anything, and the last thing he yelled was an oil burn, and the only advice I had was water and ice which I thought he already did.

Me (in response to animosity): Not extreme, but living with him with only me as the child has screwed a lot of things up.It has taken a toll on my sympathy for people (or whatever is left)

Ate: Same but he's still our dad?

Me: Eh, I honestly thought it was a small thing until I saw it.

Ate: I have only shreds of respect for him left but idk if I would go as far as to just overlook "oil burn" and figure "oh, I can't help so I'll ignore him" like that's a lil funny

Me: Again, when someone is constantly yelling, there’s a point where you don’t listen fully to what they’re saying. It only registered later that his burns might actually be serious and more than putting your fingertip on a hot pan. I also have little sympathy due to how he’s treated me during my past situations so honestly, I’ve little tolerance.

Afterwards, my mom called my sister who was absolutely hysterical and screaming on the other line to the point where my mom had to pull the phone away from her ear.

________________

Some Stupid Orchestra Stories:

Things I have said to my orchestra cohorts that might’ve scared them:

*sees me bump my instrument* Trumpet: Ouch Me (walking away): Snitches get stitches and end up in ditches, and dead men tell no tales. Doug: What?

*sees me bump my bow* Doug: Ouch Me (tired because I was just excluded from the conversation today because no one would listen to what I had to say): I’m going to stab you Doug: Pat, protect me!

Me: *tells anything about school* Everyone: MAJOR CONCERN (Examples: Kid said that this guy could have sex with his friend before she turned 21 by slipping a drug into her drink, kid saying he was going to hit a girl with a metal bar from the desk, kids smoking out back, kids make noise downstairs which causes the room I work in to shake, kids throwing stuff out car windows, kids brawling, my science teacher from regular school failing me for practically no reason)

More of an annoying incident from me: Hannah: Who’re you messaging? Your girlfriend? Sean: Yeah Me: YOU’RE STILL TOGETHER?! Sean: (sheepishly) yeah

To be fair, I get weirded out whenever they flash their privilege as semi-well off rich kids.  “Remember those special trips you get to take with your school to learn more about science? // Remember those international trips you take with your school club?” Me: ...no?! I’m not poor, I just dropped out of school before I could even go to my nearest McDonalds for a field trip.

But Doug is a little dumb sometimes. He doesn’t get my sense of humour (understandable), but he’s a little ignorant towards not-privileged people. 

He literally said he goes to sleep at 9:30pm, got into university (this is a semi-prestigious one) first try with 90s in all of his classes (at least), has a girlfriend, has friends, and doesn’t understand why anyone would stay later than that unless they had poor time management. His words, not mine. My brother stays there until around 12am studying. He was not happy to hear that. Doug is first year so my siblings are making fun of him saying he will perish in a year’s time. My parents saw him stealing kisses from his girlfriend in a parking lot during the day of our last concert. I seriously though the girl in his profile picture was his sister and not his girlfriend because they were both seriously white. Whiter than a bowl of milk I tell you.

He also doesn’t know what a period app would be for. I was a little annoyed. My brother knows about this well enough because we all know my sister and mom would not let anyone in this family live if they did not know the ins-and-outs of a period. Doug was like, “Why would you need to track that?” I responded, “Because they’re irregular.” He looked a little puzzled and I said, “Douglas, you’re a science major. There’s sex ed in school.” He responded that he is going into research (not sure what that has to do with menstrual ignorance) and never paid attention during sex ed (since it’s never for marks). I then got a little more pushy and said, “Well, if you ever want a girlfriend, maybe you should learn.” To which he said, “I have a girlfriend”. To which I gave him a look of:

Stories from the orchestra concert:

I did tell the bass instructor about this so maybe it’ll get sorted out but I did this “tell the teacher” thing twice where it backfired terribly. Let’s hope university kids are a little more grown up.

My messages from that night: Pat told me it was cute when I played in the wrong spots. It was genuine like she said it was cute. But it was like ??? I was having a panic attack. My brain left my body. I don’t want to play anymore. Then she put up her bow to make sure I wouldn’t flip the page Then she hit her bow on her bass. I really don’t want to play anymore. (She also repeated the same thing twice knowing from a previous talk that I have bad anxiety. She has anxiety as well.)

Me: Then Hannah and Patricia were commenting on my shoes. I like wearing my orthotics. They make my feet feel not in pain. Ate: tell them that Me: I did They told me to take off my shoes “They can’t even see my feet” I’m all the way in the back behind people “Then take off your shoes” “But then I’ll be in pain” “But you sit” (I have one foot on the ground) “So take them off. It’s for dress code. People can see you” Ate:  but it's literally a medical thing Tell them to actually fuck off hoh my god it's like asking a blind person to put their stick away bc people will trip on it or that you can't have your service dog with you like????

[internutter]

How about some classic babification? Your choice who has to deal with who, how this happened, etc.

[AN: Did someone say Terrible Elf Larvae?]

So far, today had been absolute shit for Angus McDonald. Everything that could go wrong, had. Including rain with the distinct absence of an umbrella, a miscommunication in schedules, a hormone rush from being a teenager, ripping his pants in front of someone awesome, and tripping over his tongue in the vicinity of a cute girl.

Next, the famous Twins were taking turns in suggesting how he could improve his life with just a few cautionary measures and Angus had flashbacks to his micro-managing, nit-picking gene donors allegedly calling themselves his parents.

There had been a huge row. A knock-down, drag-out screaming match where all three sides were yelling, “You don’t know what it’s like,” at each other. With increasing volume and differing emphasis between iterations.

Angus, clutching his wand so he didn’t make or throw fists, yelled, “I WISH YOU DID!” And accidentally cast Wish on himself.

There was a bright flash of light. A thunderclap of sound that knocked Angus flat on his back and caused the household cats to scatter into assorted nooks and crannies. When he stood back up, neither Taako nor Lup were anywhere in sight.

They could have easily cast Blink or otherwise run off to hide and play a goof on him, as was their wont. Angus wasn’t in a mood to take any of that horseshit. “Very funny, sir, ma’am,” he growled. “I am not in the mood, okay?”

Silence there, and nothing more. Well. A soft, shuffling noise from the other side of the kitchen countertop. A coo. A murmur.

Angus toured around the counter and found the Twins. Two years old at the most. Naked, because their grown self’s clothing did not fit tiny Elf babies. Huddled up and holding each other and close to tears.

One look at Angus’ pissed-off face was enough to set them wailing.

“Oh, shit,” he muttered. His heart fell as he realised exactly what had happened. “Oh... shit...”

Now he had tiny Elf larvae to look after until such time as the spell wore out or reversed somehow.

How. The fuck. Was he going to explain this to Kravitz or Barry?

“Oooh shiiiiiit...”

What did tiny baby Elves like to eat? Were they still suckling at this age? Angus suddenly realised that he didn’t know.

“Oh, shi-hi-hi-hiiit...” Angus started to cry. This was the absolute last thing he needed on the shittiest day of his life and the final straw tipped him into tears. He fell to his knees and curled up in a ball and just... wailed... about his misfortunes.

He was only dimly aware of the twins’ babbling to each other. Not babbling. The proto-version of their own language. At least they weren’t crying any more.

Angus fought to recover himself, but today had been literally the worst. He looked the baby version of Lup in her mismatched eyes and whispered, “I’m so sorry...”

The baby version of Taako was cringing a little and sort-of hiding behind baby Lup, and sucking his thumb.

“I’m really sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Aaaw,” cooed baby Lup. “Aaaaawww...” and patted his arm.

Bad day or not, these baby versions of his guardians and mentors needed him. He couldn’t cope with this alone, but he had to cope enough until someone could swing by and help out.

*

Fabricate had created some perfunctory children’s clothing out of Barry’s least favourite denim accessories, and some truly comfortable cotton sheets for their underthings. Taako’s cooking lessons had taught him how to make more than elementary food.

Creative use of furniture made a coffee table and some Fantasy Bean Bags made setting an eating area for them a work of inspired desperation.

A few Stone calls had people on their way to Casa de Taako to help out with more than just the basics.

Nothing on Faerun, alas, could make baby Taako eat his peas. Not butter. Not cheese. Not goopy sauce, which Taako had once claimed that babies loved. Not mooshing them up with the mashed potatoes. Not ketchup.

Nothing.

Not even pretending that the spoon was a dove wanting to come home to feed her babies. All the realistic cooing in the world couldn’t make baby Taako open his little baby Elf mouth.

Baby Lup thought this was hilarious. At least Angus could successfully sleight-of-hand some into her when she was openly guffawing at her brother.

Merle rushed in. “I got here as soon as I--” the scene greeted him. Twin baby Elves with more of their dinner on them than in them, Angus, also wearing a decent portion of their meal, making dove noises and sighing in exasperation as the baby flipwizard once again successfully evaded Angus’ feeding attack. There was only one way to react to that, and that was as if someone had cast Tasha’s Hideous Laughter on him.

“Oh my god,” he laughed. “Oh, help me, Pan... “ He was struck prone from the hilarity and had to punch the ground in fits of laughter.

Baby Taako thought that was hilarious, and Angus got in an attack of opportunity, getting some peas into his usually recalcitrant maw. Baby Taako looked like he’d been betrayed and then spat them with some velocity at Angus.

Baby Lup applauded, spraying pumpkin everywhere.

Angus surrendered. “I suppose you don’t have any suggestions on making baby Elves eat their vegetables, sir?”

Merle was still howling with hilarity, but he managed to sit up. Tears spilled from the corners of his eyes. “Fuck if I know how to make kids eat.” He finally rolled a will save to conquer his own giggles. “What’ve you tried?”

Angus ran through the list. Every sauce and flavour he could think of.

“So... not honey.”

Ah, fuck, he’d forgotten honey. Angus sighed and mage-handed the honey over, which he drizzled into the mess that was once a serving of peas.

Success! Finally.

It was exhausting enough just getting them to eat when they were hungry. “You at least have parenting experience points, sir. What do they need?”

“Nyuh,” baby Taako said, flinging a handful of generic mess at Merle.

“I dunno about lots of shit,” said Merle, “but these little grubs need a bath.”

Baby Taako shrieked in terror and started running as fast as his little legs could carry him. Good news, babies didn’t have much in the way of move points. Bad news, the little blighters were fucking agile as shit. Baby Lup was running around just for the sake of running around, laughing because she thought this was an immensely fun game of Chase.

Merle couldn’t do much but get in the twins’ way, which was not as effective as Angus would have liked. It took some superior dexterity and more than a few double dashes to capture the little shits.

If feeding tiny toddler Elves was messy business, bathing them was even worse. The twins did enjoy the bubbles, but they also enjoyed splashing each other, Angus, and every last inch of the bathroom, including the ceiling.

Angus was soaked, but Prestidigitation could at least make sure the towels were toasty and dry. He was more than a little out of practice with braiding their golden hair, and Merle at least was able to help with wrestling them into their bedclothes.

Once tucked into a cuddle cote, clean and dry and cozy, they looked deceptively innocent.

“I’m too old for this,” complained Merle.

“I’m feeling too old for this,” sighed Angus. He was just about ready to collapse. “Who else is coming?”

“Well,” said Merle, “You’re going to have to explain this to their husbands.”

Ffffuuuuuuck...

*

“Near as I can figure, sirs, it was a misfire of Wish. I don’t know how to break it.” He had chosen to tell the story over the two tiny, slumbering forms. They even held hands in their sleep. At least with the twins sleeping right in front of them, there was no chance of anyone yelling at him.

Angus had had more than enough yelling for the day. He’d had more than enough yelling for a lifetime.

Kravitz sighed and said, “I’m not mad. I’m... disappointed.”

Ouch. That was even worse than the yelling. “This was an accident. I didn’t mean it. Not like this...”

“Nevertheless, it happened,” grumbled Barry. He settled himself in the cuddle cote where he would be within easy comforting range of baby Lup. Just like Kravitz had settled to be ready for anny of baby Taako’s needs. “Their names are Lulu and Koko, if they don’t remember being grownups.”

“I don’t think they do. Would there be any way to test it? They barely speak Elven...”

Kravitz shook his head. “I’m pretty sure that if they did remember adulthood, they’d be doing more to try and solve this puzzle.” He glanced at the sleeping baby Taako. “That’s assuming he isn’t enjoying this second childhood...”

Angus sank into the pillows with a hopeless groan. “Gods let this be over,” he whimpered. “Gods, let this be over soon...”

*

“Koko! Get outta that soup! Lulu! Don’t eat that soup![1]”

Childish giggling erupted from the kitchen where the soup was supposed to be cooling for long storage in the Fantasy Freezer. Koko had evidently decided that this was an interesting bath and Lulu wanted to see how her brother tasted as a garnish. How they had got up on the countertop was a mystery that Angus didn’t particularly care to solve.

His leading theory was that wherever the cats could go, the twins could climb. They were agile little shits, and seemingly adept at using random bits of furniture to get into things that they shouldn’t really get into.

Angus scooped Koko out of the soup, holding the dripping child version of his mentor. “Please tell me you didn’t pee in there?”

Giggling. That was neither a yes nor a no.

Lulu took a sip from the ladle. “Ur yuck!”

Now Angus knew for sure. “You peed in it. Grub.” He didn’t think, just placed the filthy child down on the floor and tipped the ruined soup down the sink. “That’s it. I’m buying a gigantic crate of ramen and blaming you for my lack of nutrition.” He dumped the pot in the sink and scooped up Koko before he could run very far away. “You just earned yourself a bath, mister smarty-pants.”

Koko was kicking up a stink, more because Angus was taking him away from his sister than because he was getting a bath. Lulu stomped after him, yowling in protest because her brother was kicking up a stink.

“You can have a bath, too,” Angus said, “It’s just that mister messy, here, needs it more.” He was speaking Elven, the one language they had in common. On the plus side, he was getting more practice than ever in his Elven. On the minus side, he was too worn out for his normal studies.

Good thing the post-graduate program was understanding about this mess.

Lulu attempted to climb his leg and Angus scooped her up in his other arm. The twins were quieter when they were together, but when they were quieter that automatically meant that they were up to no good.

Even on the rare occasions when he found them napping in one of the cat’s cubbies, they were up to no good. They had a habit of finding shiny objects before they were lost and taking them into small hidey-holes. That wasn’t when they were busy looking for Angus’ stash of Sugar-Me-Do cereal.

Small Elves should never have processed sugar. One encounter was enough for Angus. It was also enough for the twins, and they now made it their lives’ mission to find it again and have more.

Prestidigitation took care of Koko’s dirtied clothes. A bath full of warm, soapy water took care of the twins. It also took care of his third outfit for the day.

“Honestly,” he said. “I’m only trying to keep you safe and well.” Angus scrubbed some congealed smear off of Koko’s leg. “I really understand how tough it can be. I understood like five days ago. Wish fucking granted...”

Once again, it didn’t work. The baby twins remained babies. Angus had cast Wish on himself, not them. He couldn’t cure it by Wishing them back to normal.

Clean, but not dry, Koko escaped the towel with a gleeful shriek and went running up the hall. Kravitz must be home.

“Hallo, bare bum boy,” Kravitz’s voice singsonged. “Escape again, did ya?”

Koko didn’t use his words, just made an incomprehensible squeak of glee. Lulu clambered out of the tub to join what she knew had to be the fun.

Angus was more or less forced to chase after the two of them with towels. Cursing all the way.

Kravitz had Koko wrapped up in his feathered cloak, held high in his arms. The child had his arms wrapped around the reaper and was grinning like he’d won a prize.

Lulu was wet and pouting that Barry wasn’t there for similar hugs. Angus scooped her up and started drying her off. “I guess he really likes you, sir.”

“Yeah,” Kravitz sighed. He turned his face towards Koko and said, “I love you too.” And he delivered a kiss to the baby wizard’s brow.

One thing about wishes... if they’re bad ones, they can be reversed with True Love’s Kiss.

There was another thunderclap, and another flash of light, another wave of energy that knocked Angus and Kravitz flat. Where there was once a toddler, there was now the adult Taako, looking rather stunned and clad only in his husband’s robe.

Lulu, still a baby and still in Angus’ arms, looked up at him in shock. “Wuh?”

“True love’s kiss,” crowed Taako. “Fuck yeah! Agnes, go put Lulu down for me.”

Lulu was close to tears. “Koko... Koko come back...”

Taako knelt down. “No, babe. I’m gonna bring you back,” and he kissed her on top of her head.

After yet another thunderclap and flash of light, Lup was using the towel as a rather ineffective shield for her modesty. “Wow,” she said. “Okay. Let’s never do that again, okay?”

“Hell fuck yeah,” Angus agreed. “I’m gonna never use the words I and wish in sequence ever again.”

He would wait a week before taunting Taako about peeing in the soup.

[1] Shut up, I had to. [For those of you who don’t get it, this is an adjusted Steam Powered Giraffe reference that you’d only get if you’ve seen David’s vines.]

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[croissantbae]

December 5, 2021

2022 is just a moment away. Yesterday naya got her flu shot at the doctors and this morning she woke up coughing and fevery. Maybe she got it from something else but anyway she’s sick. This wekrmd was the first weekend we didn’t have any weekend plans and Jason and I were watching the girls nonstop from 6 am to 7/8 pm. The day drags but also goes by so fast. It’s like we’re rushing to get them to bedtime so we can relax but then that also means the day is done. And it starts all over again in just a minute.

Naya was not bratty today. She was so cute. Also she’s been crying a lot more when we tell her not to do something. We’re not yelling at her or saying it harshly at all. It’ll just be like oh no don’t do that. And she will drop her mouth and wail. It’s really cute but also kind of weird. Like when did she get so sensitive. She wasn’t like this before.

Today I was trying to cut chestnuts in half and I cut my finger. Naya was so concerned and kept asking if j was okay. And after we got a bandaid kn it she kissed my finger and said it was going to be ok. Asking I felt better etc.

She still can’t stand her sister having anything to play with. She has to take it away.

Dani oh boy Dani. We took her to Americana and literally everyone thought she was a boy. Saying how cute he was. What’s his name. Etc. to be fair she was dressed in a blue outfit. We don’t even try to correct folks. I just say “his name is dani”.

This pic is from din tai Fung. I forgot how good xlb is. Been a while since we had it.

Today Jason told me more stories from his childhood and wanna wrote down key words sk I don’t forget. Bologna, water refills, beans and wonder bread. All food related I guess.

Dani is so whiney now. She throws a fit til she gets what she wants. I think she enjoys screaming in a super high pitched tone. But it’s still so cute and I adore her.

Yesterday at the doctor I got Nayas stats and she’s 35% weight and 85% height so she’s in 2 percentile BMI. Kind of shocking. She doesn’t look emackated but now we’re like reallt trying to get her to eat more. I am proud to say I made her a salmon and rice dish she scarfed down. Need to find more things she likes that are healthy. Jason just wants to fatten her up w treats and fatty foods but I wanna make sure she gets good nutrients. But In this effort to fatten her up and also because she’s sick we got her macarons (bc she points to them and says naya naya). She loved them. But Jason made her eat slowly because she was inhaling them and he was like omg no this is too expensive. So the three of us shared 3 macarons. Mostly her eating them and us taking tiny bites and giving it back to her.

Yesterday she had ice cream for being so brave getting her flu shot.

So many sweets for my little sweet.

This post was all over the place.