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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 7 months

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going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:

There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’

like wow babe. good fucking point

#like you were on the ground biting the carpet and dry sobbing while you wrote that and still. good fucking point #not a shitpost #cptsd #and it's true. there's never a satisfying answer #the truth is i know why i wasn't loved #i analyzed my parent's traumas and abuse to death. i understand why i alienated and was alienated from my siblings #i know why my mom was too overwhelmed to be capable of nurturing #i know why my dad vanished into addiction and avoidance #the details of our cycles of trauma and cptsd and family history i have a phd in all of it #i understood perfectly. i spent years studying and now i knew the answer #and guess what? IT WAS NOT SATISFYING!!!#because they still didn't love me! and i still couldn't change that!#it was still a completely unsatisfying state of affairs!#so like. when the people who are supposed to love you...don't.#when the people who are supposed to take care of you...fail to #you can look for answers and reasons and explanations #but that's not actually going to FIX your situation.#and it's probably not within your ability TO fix the situation. (and definitely not your job)#because you don't need answers--you need a new situation #*inserts Just Walk Out. You Can Leave!!! (Running Skeleton) Meme*#and yes. walking out isn't always possible.#but for you i hope it will be one day soon. and i hope you build the courage to take that leap.#stepping away from the people who failed to love you...it feels like being untethered but also like being lighter than air #new and scary. immensely relieving. the future opens up. empty but empty like a canvas. blindingly bright until your eyes adjust #like climbing out of a pit you called home and for the first time realizing how bright the light of day can truly be #when you aren't just getting glimpses from the bottom of a hole

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egophiliac · 1 month

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roll out the red carpet guys we're going to the SHAFTLANDS

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #tapis rouge #i have nothing else right now i'm sorry i just got excited by that vil hairstyle #(and i got REALLY excited for a second because i thought red carpet = movie premiere and i always love it when vil gets to be an ~acteur~)#(but 'luxe couture' makes me think fashion show instead. ah well.)#anyway it's time for the vil hometown event!!!! or...travel event at least?#are we gonna get to meet eric or is it gonna be someone else 👀 👀 👀#like i would love to see eric but i kind of think it won't be him since he had that little main story cameo #(as portrayed by Generic Man Silhouette with some hair drawn on)#but feel free to prove me wrong twst! show us how much more glorious his hair has gotten in the last ten-ish years

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zegalba · 3 months

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Edward James, patron of the surrealists, was so besotted with his wife, the dancer Tilly Losch, that when he saw the trail of wet footprints she left up the stairs after her bath at Monkton House, he had them woven into the carpet.

#Edward James #Tilly Losch #love #lovecore #carpet #green #art #footprints #feet #weirdcore

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themakeupbrush · 4 months

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Margot Robbie at the 2024 Golden Globes

#margot robbie #golden globes #golden globes 2024 #red carpet #I love it #she could have done more with the hair imo but I can’t talk mines been in a bun for two days

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sofiaruelle · 3 months

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Commission for the lovely @flowerandthesongstress of our fave triad, Sam, Abigail and Sebastian basking in the afterglow of a very productive band practice.

The Companion piece

#commission #stardew valley #stardew valley ASS gang #stardew valley abigail #stardew valley sam #stardew valley sebastian #sdv abigail #sdv sam #sdv sebastian #sdv abigail x sam x sebastian #very productive indeed #also i would love to thank flowerandthesongstress for letting me have free reign on the commission #and her infinite patience with me as i figure out where all their limbs go #and set the right spicy mood of the final illustration #i had a lot of fun with making it lowkey canon compliant with sams green carpet and wooden floors #the discarded clothes on the floor really helps with the acoustics

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sadbeautifulttragic · 5 months

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surprise appearance at the Renaissance World Premiere

#taylor swift #taylorswift #tswift #tswiftedit #my edits #appearances #2023 #red carpet #beyonce #love them supporting each other!!!#also this dress is crunchy lol #had to put this dress full size on your dash #ur welcome #1k

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peppermintjonas · 1 year

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#Vegas carpet #it’s giving five more minutes lyric video #am not actually in Vegas #wish I was in Vegas #am mentally in Vegas #Vegas chaos incoming #love this carpet #pretty design

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wandavisionedits · 4 months

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—Elizabeth Olsen arrives at the 81st Golden Globe Awards

#elizabeth olsen #eolsenedit #eolsendaily #elizabethdaily #golden globes #dailywomen #marvelcast #marvel #marvelcastedit #wandavision #love and death #red carpet #candymontgomeryedit #wanda maximoff #my edit #WVE edits

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morganbritton132 · 8 months

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Dustin posts a Tiktok with that “What two clips give off the same energy” video that’s just:

(1) A video of Steve tossing Eddie’s shoes to him like, “Chop, chop, chop, we got a middle school basketball game to go to, Munson.”

Eddie responds in a full whine like, “Why??? What did I do to the king to receive this cruel and unusual punishment?”

Steve, ignoring his theatrics, throws a t-shirt with the school logo on it at him like, “Represent.”

And (2) a video of Steve and Eddie lounging on the couch when Steve asks, “Can you get tickets to the Barbie movie premiere?”

Eddie doesn’t even look up from his phone when he says, “Probably. Only if you walk the carpet with me though.”

Steve throws his head back and groans, “Ughhhh, I hate that.”

#Steve and Eddie are like: I love you and I love your dedication to your job but I hate this specific aspect of it #They’ve been together for thirty years and Eddie’s only got Steve on a red carpet twice #and one of those times he was filling in for Eddie’s assistant #eddie munson tiktok saga #eddie munson #steve harrington

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horreurscopes · 2 months

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i like my body when it is with your body.

#death note #meronia #near #mello #mihael keehl #nate river #mello dn #near dn #artists on tumblr #horreurart #been working on this one here and there for a long while. i love drawing mello's scar >:) it's like a brain coral or a very shitty maze.#also i cannot remember the last time i posted something even slightly racy so this feels rather scandalous #2024 is the year of posting sexy blorbo art i've decided...#anyway this literally happened in canon it just wasn't relevant to death note's journey. source: trust me #something kind of melancholic about this piece i think. it's like spying on them. it pulled that one ee cummings poem from the #deepest receses of my mind -- i hadn't thought about it in years. it's sooo romantique. to me #girl help the anime boys are in doomed love...#in my mind this forbidden rendezvous is happening in one of those abandoned love motels with heart shaped tubs and round mattresses and #mirrors on the ceiling and wall carpeting. it's kind of gross.#sometime between spk control room meeting and mello dying. rip king at least you got the love of your life laid once (1) one time

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namchyoon · 5 months

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he's so endearing 😭

#btsgif #btsedit #bts #kim namjoon #namjoon #*#*gifs #*knj #*bts #2023 love your w red carpet #tw flashing

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getosugurusbangs · 3 months

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bleaching the bathtub puts me at ease.

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egophiliac · 8 months

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this chapter has been so absolutely nuts that I actually low-key forgot that I had a couple of new UM posters to do! wild! anyway, I gotta think about Lilia's some more, so here is my beautiful electric crocodile son in the meantime. god I hope this reads properly

(I went with Volt to go with his name, but there's a Bolt version too in the print-size folder!)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #unique magic posters #sebek: i have no choice...i'm going to have to use my special secret technique...#sebek: (furiously shuffling his socks on the shag carpeting) JUPITER THUNDERCLAP ZAP #i love him so much #it turns out i had missed a couple of scenes in his hexagon map so i went back and made sure to hit everything #and i am SO glad i did #i almost missed the spoon scene! I ALMOST MISSED THE SPOON SCENE #every single bit with little sebek and silver is just such a delight #in fact every single bit with big sebek and silver is pretty delightful too #sebek going 'silver if you don't come out RIGHT NOW i'm going to tell everyone your embarrassing fishing story!' is a personal favorite #tell us the story sebek. TELL US

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deckardsdwelling · 1 year

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