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#lyrics on the right page are from
thatonefatgumsimp · 5 months
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Ohhh people of tumblrrrrr~
Guess what time of year it is againnnn?~
:D
CREATUANARY TIME!!!
I drew this last night :3
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highwaydiamonds · 1 year
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#journaling#art journaling#i've done couple spreads/pages from these affirmation cards i got last year with a set of stickers & planner thing i purchased#they weren't designed for this but i've used a couple of them that way#i feel like this is a very simplified - not exactly sanitized - but not NOT sanitized either version of how i've felt about things lately#there's been rather a lot of 'the suck" but i a working to try and keep my head up#oh - and because of the shiny surface the rectangle in the top left - is an image of hokusai's the great wave#i am so full of FEELING - i don't know where to put it all. it's like a spill running in too many directions#i don't know how to organize them or say them all without spreading some kind of infection around- triggering/dumping on other people#and maybe i am also simply tired on top of everything else - smh - but i am tryong to sit with these waves#to remind myself that i need to do what i can to mitigate things - that i know what some of these things ARE - even if i don't like them#and that i CAN do them - regardless#and the stuff i cannot change - that i don't have to absorb it all - that i can see it - and name it and admit it sucks and try and let go#and if - let go- isn't quite right then it's more do what i can to keep going anyway - then that's what i need to keep trying to do#i feel like i keep coming back to the mountain goats' lyrics from This Year:#There will be feasting and dancing in jerusalem next year - and i am gonna make it through this year if it kills me#embrace the suck
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moinsbienquekaworu · 1 month
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How have I been in fandom for - going on 8 years (?) and not gotten into fanvids before?? All the association I could have been making.... All the memories.... All the composition and clever editing....
#going a little bit insane frankly#it's been about a month of absolute and utter mcu frenzy in my brain and i'm. vibrating#truly feels like some kind of intense fever at times#i've rewatched talitha78's set fire to the rain vid so many times it entrances me#it's to the point where every time i see that shot of loki grabbing mjolnir i hear 'you rose to claim it'#btw hello 13 years late to the party but like. 20 seconds in and i felt like that vid unlocked something in my artist brain#no because the lyrics are 'i let it fall / my heart / and as it fell / you rose to claim it' right#and so she puts clips of thor being banished and losing mjolnir and then loki trying to grab it#which. the interaction between the song and the video making mjolnir thor's heart.... not even 20 seconds!!#it's so clean to me#it's like when i actually took a good look at bill cipher's design and realised he had such expressive potential#and i had to do like a page of doodles about it#in 20 seconds that fanvid from 2011 made me want to make animatics so so bad#which btw i watched it partly because a fic i liked cited it as an inspiration#and partly because i looked at the dates#and realised that the creator put it out like not even two weeks after the movie came out??#absolutely insane. i love this so much#this is like having a family heirloom in your hands#grandma lending me the necklace she wore to her first date with grandpa for my anniversary dinner or something#i have just entered a new fandom and the fans who were here before are showing me what it was like when they'd just arrived too#the sacred texts and such also#anyway. man i love fandom.#wow i have a ramble tag now
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risingsunresistance · 2 months
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im so mad that i'll probably never have an answer as to whether or not the crimson essence description is actually a reference to the first line of poppyfields or if that is just the most insane coincidence of my life
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lqnar · 2 years
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i should write this stuff in my diary
#yeah i started a journal#i need to use my stickers for SOMETHING right#i love stationery it is my newest obsession#i'm spending so much money on it but i usually don't buy stuff so it's okay it's fine i will survive.#''i usually don't buy stuff'' ok liar but what i meant is that i generally only splurge on food.#which obviously isn't great all of the time. hence the bulimia.#so buying stickers and washi tape to feel an ounce of happiness is fine.#i used to journal/vent in a notebook in high school#i ripped out every single page and threw it out at one point#i think close to graduation?#it was really helpful to vent all my feelings in it but it was also really dark stuff about my depression and suicide plans#and also my trauma. and every single song lyric i related to at the time#so basically a lot of uncomfortable embarrassing and sad stuff that i didn't want anyone else to see or reread myself#so it's all gone#as is most of my venting from that time. i had a 50 k word document with venting at one point. that's  a whole book#50 k words sounds insane it might just have been 50 pages i can't remember tbh. but still a lot of words.#it's gone now. i deleted everything about that situation and every single one of my tumblr posts when i was going to kill myself#i tend to clean out my life and my embarrassing online posts and every note i have ever written when i think i'm going to die soon.#i'm not suicidal anymore but it still is a mindset i somewhat still have. like oh better remember to delete these embarrassing posts#before i kms.#like ok king but have you considered mental health as a Choice bro just wondering
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actualtoad · 2 years
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ok but i think white people could give their songs about culture a rest
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peachdeluxe · 8 days
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A lot of you on here feel waaay too comfortable admitting that you don't and refuse to listen to rap music, and I'm not loving the incredibly reductive takes on rap because the kendrick/drake beef has it on some of yall's radar for the first time in your life.
I'm not going to sugar coat it-- for americans especially, if you consider music a significant interest of yours but still feel the need to search for acceptable reasons to keep yourself ignorant of black music, or think of rap as a monolith of hate and violence and not equally as diverse as any other genre, or can only name nonblack rappers… you should be embarrassed of that. And your embarrassment should not keep you from being active about exposing yourself to unfamiliar art and broadening what you listen to.
'I don't understand what they're saying/they rap too quickly' I'm surprised by how much I keep seeing this-- speed is not a stylistic trademark of most rap music, & clearer diction as a performer is much more necessary in rap than other genres?? Statistically rap has a lower bpm (here's an example of one person's study) average than other genres. (of course these aren't all-encompassing, but you can look into this yourself using sites like bpmdatabase.com.) Do you really feel overwhelmed by speed listening to Kendrick or Biggie or Nas or 2Pac, or have you never actually listened to their songs?
'I have to look up the lyrics'-- so what? is it a bad thing to take an extra few seconds to engage with an artist's work? If you listen to lyrical music, do you care when it's the artists you listen to? Why does the thoughtful art consumption everyone talks about not also apply to black art?
'there is too much violence and misogyny and commercialism' this is not unique to rap, or true of all rap music. Artists exist that talk about other things, the way they exist in all genres. There is an entire wikipedia page listing alternative hip hop musicians and rappers if you consider seeking it out too much labor. Click one!
'i find it unrelatable'-- who cares? Being unable to engage with art you don't find wholly relatable is a deeply childish and self centered way to exist. You get on here reblogging feel good navel-gazey posts about the shared human experience and caring for one another, but a rapper talking about living with violence or poverty is stretching the limits of what you can imagine or empathize with too much for you to care about it? You don't find that embarrassing to admit to?
You don't have to love rap, you don't have to incorporate it into what you listen to every day, but a lot of you need to be aware you're parroting reagan era anti-rap (& antiblack) pearl-clutching talking points, and it's a very ugly look. It isn't racist if your favorite genre isn't rap, but you need to do some serious self reflection if you consider it inherently less artistic, intelligent or positive than 'whiter' genres when you don't actually listen to it. I am looking at you, people into other counterculture genres-- it's crazy how much I see this from self-professed punks and metalheads especially lmfao. If expression, counterculture art, anti-censorship in music and the right for raw and unfiltered music to exist matters to you as much as you say you do, you should care about rap's relationship to censorship & fight for its legitimacy just as much as what you listen to.
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morimess · 30 days
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i keep seeing songs on TT that remind me of Linebeck...and I don't...really know how to feel about it.
#On the one hand#It makes me happy that I'm seeing scenes and animatics in music again#Specifically that I'm seeing scenes with specific characters#Because that's something that I kinda love about my brain#Is how easily it turns music and lyrics into a visual story I can follow just by turning a song on#Back when I first started with The Moss and this whole page#That was supposed to be the gimmick#That's why I have that abandoned Sander's Sides comic featuring Virgil and Remus#(Honestly at the height of my involvement in that fandom I was able to imagine EVERY 35mm song as being between Sanders Sides characters)#I still see a lot of scenes#They've just been more focused on the world building of The Moss rather than just the main cast#Or some songs just don't fit The Moss or any other fandom I've been in before#So I almost ignore them in a way#BUT THEN THIS MOTHERFUCKER#I honestly don't listen to much music anymore#I work and listen and do chores to a YouTube playlist of streamers and let's plays#My most exposure to music nowadays is usually from TT unfortunately#And goddamn all the songs I'm exposed to just fit right in with how I view him or how other characters view him#And it almost makes me mad#Like I can't just listen to a song#I hear one lyric or the guitar or bass or cello does a funky little rift#And then I'm sent straight into that world and have to figure out what I want it to do and where I want it to fit#I think part of it is every song in The Moss has to serve a purpose for the overarching narrative or as an “I am” song for the character#Meanwhile Linebeck....I can fit so many aus into that bad boy you don't understand#Or just throw it all into the wild-west of post-ph/pre-ph and just watch the chaos unfold.#It also doesn't help that my fyp keeps bringing up nautical themed shit#Like....ofc I'm going to be thinking about him while listening to this song- there's wave sounds in the background#But I was kinda content to...not be seeing anything in songs?#Listening to music had gone from something that I could easily just put on in the background to something I was paying All my attention to#Just so I could see the characters and the scenes
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rebeccccccaaa · 1 month
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Too Sweet
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Spencer Reid x Reader
:: Practically at his beck and call, Spencer knows you’re too sweet for him. He knows he shouldn’t use you but he can’t stop himself when you’re also all too enthusiastic to fuck him ::
warnings :: smutttt, casual sex (kinda lol), oral (fem receiving), over stimulation, insomnia!spencer, spencer spitting facts (literally), reader is described to have hair length long enough to stick to your cheeks, obviously reader is described as afab, not sure what else i should tag so let me know what i miss :)
author’s notes :: hello, hello! honestly i saw this tik tok edit of spencer with this song (Too Sweet - Hozier) and felt a bit inspired by it and also loosely by lyrics too. please be kind as it’s been a couple years since i last wrote a fic and it’s my first one about dr reid too, so let me know if you guys like it, comment, reblog, all that jazz and critiques are more than welcome! Enjoy!
WC :: ~4k
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It was pretty late into the night, it was the first weekend in weeks that the team was able to really enjoy. Spencer sat in a corner of his apartment, a glass of whiskey sat on the table as he flipped the pages of a book he’s read a thousand times before, albeit it was one of favorites. 
He was hesitant to call, he didn’t want to pull you away from enjoying your weekend but when it came to his pleasure, he put himself first. You were always too nice to say no to him and he knew that. It made him feel sleazy sometimes, but this was who he was now. Rugged, damaged, fucked up. He’d been through a lot. But in those moments where you squirmed and whined beneath him, he felt satiated. You were his drug now. 
“Hello?” he mumbled when the call picked up.
“Spencer,” your voice was a whisper as  you practically sang his name.
“You’re awake,” he said.
“Yes,” you responded.
“It’s a little late don’t you think?” he poked. 
“Then why are you calling?” 
You knew why he was calling. He only ever wanted one thing from you when the sky was dark. You didn’t mind it though. You basked in it. You kind of liked it. The feeling of having sex without commitment. Your job didn’t give you enough time for a commitment. You didn’t feel humiliated or belittled by Spencer’s desires. In fact, his lust for you turned you on in most cases. Most. 
Spencer was still a good friend to you. Regardless of sleeping with him, he was your closest friend. And recently, you noticed changes in him. Maybe you’ve kept a closer eye on him more than before but you were a little concerned. You had the right after everything he’s been through. He seemed more tired than usual, even though he was still punctual with work. Although you didn’t sleep in his bed after every time you slept together, when you did, you pretended not to notice his exits and long absences in between the long hours of the night. You could barely hear his ever so quiet footsteps roaming the living room. The clanking of coffee mugs in the kitchen and his quiet ‘Shit’ when he thought he was being too loud.
Three subtle knocks rapped his door, so quiet Spencer would’ve missed if he had breathed just a bit louder. A grin spread across his face subconsciously, glancing at the clock before taking long strides to the door. It was almost midnight. You stood in the doorway with heavy eyes, not the drunk kind, but the tired kind. He moved aside to let you in. Just like last time; and all the other times you showed up at his door for him. 
“I thought you went out tonight,” he questioned, rhetorically. 
“I did. For a bit,” you told him, “I just had one drink, then went home.”
“What are you doing up so late?” you asked, you already know the answer. And Spencer knows you know too, though he tried at first to be more subtle in his nightly fixtures. He simply sighed with amusement. You set your things down on his couch, eyes adjusting to the dim lights that hardly lit the room. The glass sitting on the table in the corner caught your eyes though. 
“What are you drinking?” you asked.
“Uh, whiskey. Neat.” 
“Ew, why?” you joked.
“It’s not that bad,” he shrugged. A whiskey wouldn’t exactly be Spencer’s first choice of drink but then again his first choice of drink wouldn’t even be alcohol. If it was, he would probably be content with a beer, or something of the sort. He was sort of going through a phase during nights. He was sleeping a lot less too. 
“I just didn’t take you for a whiskey kind of guy,” you teased.
“What kind of guy did you take me for?” he poked; he wasn’t really talking about drinks anymore though. 
“Water,” you joked, making him laugh. 
Spencer stood before you now. His hands were slightly hesitant this time to rest on your hips. 
“Is everything ok, Spencer?” you asked him. 
“Yes,” his voice was a whisper. 
You didn’t believe him, but you knew better than to press him. He was a stubborn guy and whether you did or didn’t you weren’t going to get an answer. You slid your hands up his chest before cupping the back of his neck with your hands. The kiss was chaste. You didn’t want to sleep with him if he was having second thoughts.
“Are you sure? If you’ve changed your mind I can head hom-,” you were telling him.
“No, don’t,” he rushed out. 
“I’m fine; I just haven’t been sleeping well,” he confessed. This surprised you, not because you didn’t know, but because you didn’t think he would tell you. 
“Well, then maybe I should go. That way you can finally get to bed before the sun comes up for once,” you joked with him, “Besides, you’re the one who's always telling people how important sleep is to the human body.”
Your words shocked Spencer this time. Admittedly, in the back of mind he suspected that you could sense him leaving his bed, or your bed sometimes, and that one or more times he’d been a little loud dwindling in the next room. But he didn’t realize you were fully aware of his nightly escapades. You knew him too well. You were too sweet to him. Spencer knew after all the fucked up things he’s been through he didn’t deserve your friendship; or anything more despite the fact.
“Did you know that elephants sleep the least of any other animal?” he told you, he doesn’t know why. Maybe to distract you, or seduce you. Both outcomes came often enough for him to make it a guessing game.
“You’re not an elephant.”
And then there were the ultra rare times when neither outcome happened; just now being one of them. 
“Sleep deprivation has been associated with reduced sexual desire and arousal,” he tried again.
“Well, I can help with that,” you teased. There we go.
He leaned down to kiss your lips but you pulled back in tease, smile on your face; you knew how pussywhipped you had this man. He didn’t want to fight it, he was growing desperate for you with every passing second. Rolling his eyes, he dipped his head in the crook of your neck. His hands left your hips, pulling you closer to him from your waist and lower back. Your hands began to unbutton his shirt, he was still wearing the clothes you saw him working in earlier that day. 
You stopped him, never been one to have sex anywhere other than the bedroom, taking his hand already knowing where to go after doing so many times before already. Although, it wasn’t like his apartment was a confusing labyrinth. He followed you like always. 
You reached the edge of the bed, sitting instinctively. Your hand went straight to his belt, undoing it with ease. Spencer pulled your hands away from his hips before sinking to his knees to the ground. He pulled your hips to the very edge, scratching the skin as he desperately pulled at your pants bringing them down your legs. Of course you let him.
He pushed you back and you fell on your elbows, still able to see him so clearly. See him dip his head and kiss the skin on the inside of your knee, his eyes lingering on yours. You let your head go for a second, basking in the feeling of his lips. They always made you feel so warm and tingly. One thing about Spencer, he loved foreplay. All the little things that lead up to sex. Most of the time, he craved the foreplay more than the sex itself. 
He moved your legs over his shoulders, his arms wrapping around your thighs, his hands holding your hips. His nose ran along your inner thighs. Your skin erupted in goosebumps at the feeling of his warm breath coming from his nose. His fingers fiddled against your hip bones and you wiggled a bit becoming desperate by the minute for something more than just this teasing.
“Spence,” you whined, looking back at him.
“It doesn’t matter how many times we do this, you’ll never learn patience will you?” Spencer bartered. 
“Spencer, I don’t come to you to learn patience,” you spat, not with any malice however.
“You won’t come at all with that attitude,” he snapped back, hiding a grin between your legs. 
“Spencer!” you gasped.
He chuckled lowly, bringing his hand between your thighs, pulling your underwear to the side to expose you to him. You were glistening, slick beginning to leak from you already. Spencer could feel himself getting hard. He precariously tried to not buck his hips into the bed like horny teenager.  
“Fuck,” he whispered under his breath. 
He stepped up quickly letting your legs drop harshly. His fingers curled over the hem of your underwear pulling them down and tossing behind his shoulder before returning to his previous position. He felt like he was possessed. Acting and moving like it was primal, instinctive. He wanted nothing more in this moment than to satisfy you. 
He kissed all the places except the place you needed the most. You curled your toes anticipating his next move, longing for his lips, tongue, fingers, anything to bring you pleasure. Just when you were about to sit up, ready to nag at him, his lips wrapped around your bud. 
Your shoulders gave out at the feeling. Your body electrifying instantaneously. Your eyes trained on the ceiling, focusing on everything about Spencer in this moment, the sounds, his touch, his tongue. His tongue dipping in you every now and then, making you moan feverishly. His hands spread out, pinning your hips down to the bed to try and get you to stop wiggling your hips, but he wasn’t too successful in that. 
“Knock it off,” he groaned, removing a hand wrapped around your leg to bring his fingers to your entrance.
“It’s not enough; I need more,” you whined.
“No, you want more,” he debuted, “You’re being greedy.”
“And you’re being mean,” you quipped, you always had something to retort.
“Ok, fine,” he stood up.
“Stop!” you whined, “Please, come back. Do whatever you want.”
“I will,” he sat on his knees again, instantly bringing his fingers up to rub slow circles that made your toes curl. 
He purposefully let them every now and then prod at your entrance make your hips jerk in surprise. He could see how wet you were, all of the slick telling him how needy you were. He looked up to look at your face. His eyes catching your nipples peeking through the fabric of your shirt from the pleasure already, smiling to himself. 
“Sexual arousal can cause an increase in blood flow to not just female genitalia, but also the breasts,” he told you, feeling your thighs squeeze ever so slightly.
“Is that your way of telling me my nipples are hard because of you?” you teased.
“Yes,” he stated before diving straight back between your thighs. 
His tongue did circles like his fingers, the wetness and warmth much more stimulating than before. His fingers slid inside you, curling when he couldn’t push them any further. You moaned out, reaching your hand down to comb your fingers through Spencer’s shaggy hair. The noises of everything bounced off the walls of Spencer’s shallow bedroom. It sounded vulgar but so sexy. Your heavy breathing practically syncing together. 
Your thighs squeezed more and more as you got closer to your climax; you didn’t care if you were suffocating Spencer. If he died, he died pleasuring you and neither of you minded it in this moment. Your hips grinding against his tongue chasing you release frantically. Spencer pumped his fingers in and out of you rapidly, leading you to ecstasy. 
Your breaths became shaking, as did your moans. You were overcome with pleasure as your orgasm hit you so suddenly. You could feel Spencer’s smile growing against you, you knew that he wasn’t going to withdraw despite reaching your climax. 
“Oh god, too much, Spence.” 
“First it was not enough, now it’s too much?” he taunted you, fingers still pumping in and out you strenuously. 
“Spence!” you wailed, your voice trembling embarrassingly. 
When he wouldn’t give out, you pulled at his hair as you sat up and pulled his mouth away from between your thighs. 
“Oh ow, ow, ow!” he whined. 
“Jesus, you were gonna give me a heartache,” you whined. 
“Actually the possibility of having a heart attack during sexual activity is exceedingly low. So you wouldn’t have had anything to worry about; if anything you would get a small headache,” he explained. 
“You’re giving me a headache,” you whined, making him laugh.  
You pulled him from the back of his neck, crashing his lips against yours. You loved to kiss Spencer. You always felt the closest to him physically when you kissed. Which is ironic since he was quite literally inside you most nights. Kissing, the art of kissing, was practically your love language. You always gave small pecks when you were together, privately of course. 
Spencer was worried at first, that kissing was too intimate that things would complicate fast and feelings would get hurt. But as time went on and things continued to stay normal between you, he just began to relish in it rather than worry about nothing. At least that’s what he’s convinced himself of. 
He suddenly remembered the first time you slept together. You were in his apartment one night going over some details of the case. Nothing so major, or frightening, but something wasn’t adding up. You decided to take a break, cracking open some beers and just talk. One beer became two, then three, then four and then suddenly bottles littered the pitiful coffee table in front of you. You were very clear with him, “I don’t just sleep with anybody.” But you were a woman with needs just as much as Spencer was a man, “Neither do I.”
“Things have to stay the way they are if we do this,” he told you that night.
“They will,” you assured him. 
You rested your forehead against his seeing his eyes seem different. Spencer always did this. Everytime, just for a minute or even a second, he would disappear behind his eyes, like he was reminiscing on a memory you couldn’t describe. 
“You did that thing again,” you said with a small grin on your face. 
“I know,” he blushed, “Sorry.”
“You ever gonna tell me what you’re thinking about when you do that?” you questioned.
“Nope,” he smirked, making you giggle. 
Spencer stood straight up shagging his shirt off before scrambling out of his pants. He crawled back over you settling his hips between your thighs as he dipped his head down to attach his lips to your neck. Your hand curled around his neck, sliding your fingers through his hair as his breath and lips tickled your skin. Your hips fit together snuggly, grinding against desperate to chase each other’s highs.
Spencer reached into the drawer beside your head to pull out a condom. You snatched it from his hands with a devilish smirk on your face tearing it with your teeth. You spat the foil corner from your mouth, pulling the condom from its package before tossing it aside. You reached between your bodies stroking Spencer. His face blushing red, contorting with pleasure as it’s the first of the night to feel some sort of friction he needed from the beginning. The reason he called you in the first place. 
Spencer let his hands trace your skin. Though you wouldn’t react, your skin erupted in goosebumps. Feeling him prodding against your entrance, your breath hitched, your heart skipping a beat. You always anticipated this part. No matter how many times you and Spencer spent the night together, you couldn’t ever get used to the flips your stomach made at this time. 
Spencer pushed his hips into you, his length stroking your walls making your hum in delight. Spencer’s breath became heavy as he pulled out just enough before rutting back in you with skill. Your face began to feel hot as Spencer began to find a good rhythm. You could feel the sweat building on your forehead, the air cold against your scalp. 
You looked at Spencer’s face; the veins bulging from his forehead and his neck. You cupped his cheek with your hand, catching his rhythm with your hips. Your breath became heavy, your hums became moans. Spencer wasn’t exactly the most vocal lover you laid with. Not that Spencer was your lover of course. That‘s not what you meant.
“What’s going on in that pretty little brain?” Spencer’s voice took you from your sudden trance; his pace beginning to slow. He brought his hand to your face, pulling the stray hairs that stuck to your cheeks from your sweat away.
“Nothing, just don’t stop,” you sighed, pulling his lips down to yours again. 
Spencer picked up his pace again, the sound of skin slapping echoing in the room. You felt overcome with an ambitious heat throughout your body. You pushed Spencer’s shoulders up trying your best to cool down without stopping your chase to your high. Spencer sat on his knees gripping your hips, practically ramming his hips into yours. Your back arched and you gripped the sheets beneath you. 
“Oh god, fuck,” you cried out. Your thighs squeezing Spencer’s torso as you began to get closer to your climax. 
“Shit, it’s like I can’t get enough no matter how many times I have you squirming beneath me,” he gloated. 
You could see Spencer's chest begin to get red, his knuckles however turning white. Your hands reached down gripping his wrists. Prying them away, before sitting up to straddle his legs, as they stretched forward, adjusting comfortably. You held on to his shoulders sturdily, finding an entirely new rhythm to chase your high. 
Spencer’s hands ran up your back, sliding under your shirt that you had yet to take off. No wonder you were overwhelmed with heat. He peeled the tight fabric from your skin, tossing it to the ground like he has so many times before. He unhooked your bra with ease, his eyes instantly trained to your chest. He couldn’t help his hands following, massaging the soft skin. Spencer looked up to you as you bounced up and down. Sweat dripping seductively down the valley of your breasts. 
“You’re so pretty,” Spencer whispered, staring up at you.
“I know,” you joked breathlessly, giving him a playful wink. 
Spencer let out a breathy laugh at that. The both of you were itching for a release now. Your bodies squirming against one another, aching to give the other the release. You leaned back placing your hands on his thighs, moving your hips faster and harder than before. 
“Spencer, I’m getting close, I feel it,” you whimpered, “Please tell me you’re close too.”
“I’m close,” he breathed out.
“Fuck,” you cried.
“Come on, sweetheart. Let go,” Spencer mused, he reached between you two, fingers circling quickly between your thighs to bring you to climax even faster.
You gasped out, chest heaving as you felt the waves of pleasures wash over you suddenly. You couldn’t help the loud moans escaping from you as you threw your head back; arched back and thighs tensed. Spencer’s hand held your body close to himself, and you curled forward wrapping your arms around his head as you climaxed indefinitely. Spencer grunted below you, his legs stiffening and jerking upward. Curses whispered from his lips. 
“Oh, shit,” you gasped, relaxing and slumping your body over Spencer. 
“Treat me good, like always,” he whispered, his hand coming briefly to stroke your hair gently. 
He rolled you over, laying you lazily on his bed before climbing out of the bed swiftly. He stumbled his way to dispose of the rubber. He grabbed a small towel from a drawer along with something to cover himself. He sat silently on the edge of the bed, gently cleaning you as your eyes slowly blinked, telling him you were exhausted. 
“You want to stay the night? I can see how tired you are.” 
“I’ll be gone first thing in the morning,” you quipped with a small grin on your face. 
Spencer laid beside you, covering your body with the blankets. You curled by his side, your leg falling over his hips. He turned the lights out, but the soft golden glow from the lights in the room next door streamed in. His arm wrapped around you, fingers softly stretching your back. Steady breaths against his chest gave him a sense of comfort. He was always a bit jealous how easily sleep came to you; how peaceful you looked when you did. Spencer tried to close his eyes. He tried to let rest wash over him like a blanket. What felt like seconds was an hour. And another hour. He peeked at his watch laying on the nightstand beside him, three o’clock the time read. 
Sighing, he sneaked out of bed, careful to not wake you. He skulked towards the kitchen, eyeing the small glass of whiskey still on the table. He couldn’t help smirk to himself over it. He opened the cabinet grabbing a mug, pouring a bitter liquid into it. He took a big swig of his favorite beverage, basking in all the flavors, when suddenly a beautiful figure stood before him. 
“Hey,” his voice was quiet. 
“I’m guessing you haven’t slept,” you tiptoed your way to him, you could hear him sighing. 
“Is there anything at all I can do to help you?” you whispered, carefully placing your hand on Spencer’s warm back. 
“No, but having you here is enough.”
You were beginning to blur the lines between your arrangement and your friendship. But neither you nor Spencer could muster up the courage to stop what you’ve started. Spencer indulged in your sweetness, the way you were always there to satiate his desires, the way you opened yourself to him like heaven’s gate. And you, well you would never admit it. Being in love with Spencer that is. You’ve known him for years; seen the best parts of him and helped him through the worst. You knew him the best of anyone you’ve known before. And he could say the same too. He’s never opened up to anyone as much as he has to you. 
You were perfect for each other. And yet, Spencer wouldn’t allow himself to bask in it. He truly believed he didn’t deserve you. That all the demons that haunted him in these dark hours were undeserving of your kindness, compassion, gentleness. Simply thinking about you was often enough to calm him in tense situations. But he would never tell you this. So here he was, standing in the kitchen with his coffee black at three in the morning wondering why you couldn’t see that he would never be enough for you. 
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starryknight-tarot · 8 months
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18+ 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓛𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝓝𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 𝓣𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾
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pile 1 --> pile 2 --> pile 3
pile 4 --> pile 5 --> pile 6
my masterlist<3 . paid readings
Hi beautiful souls✨ Today we will be looking into your person's late night thoughts about you. This reading will have 18+ messages so if you are a minor please do not interact with this reading. Remember to meditate, take a deep breath and pick whatever pile calls to you the most. My readings are meant for everyone, no matter what sexuality or identity you are. Since this is a general reading, make sure to take what resonates and leave what doesn't.
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Pile 1
Cards: Strength rx, Ten of Swords rx, Four of Wands rx, Five of Swords, Queen of Swords, Page of Wands, King of Cups, Knight of Pentacles
Back of the Deck: Temperance
For you Pile 1, I am getting a more submissive fantasy for your person. I was actually picking up that this person may be someone you have already been intimate with, or just started dating, something like that. I feel like your person wants to feel submissive in bed and try new things. Your person may have a sort of control kink? Your person is thinking of blindfolds and being tied up. I feel like these are things they have never tried, or very rarely tried and really liked it. I think they want to fight for dominance during foreplay, but in a teasing way like they are just trying to act up and make you put them in their place. Also this reading is for everyone regardless of sexuality and gender and take it how it resonates but spirit keeps showing me a feminine in a more dominant position. They may be into a kind of dominatrix kind of thing. Yeah spirit is pushing that message to me pretty strongly, especially since we got the Queen of Swords. But your person imagines being degraded, they want you to put them in their place and make them feel little. I heard things such as "Tell me I am a slut" or "I want you to only look at me tonight". Ok, so they're a little jealous and they wanna take it out in bed. They imagine a scenario where you make them jealous and that is when they become more dominant or bratty and possessive and when they get you alone, they will make sure you don't think about anyone else. They would seduce you with sweet nothings whispered in your ear and praise for you. Kind of the opposite of what they want you to do to them. They imagine a beautiful night full of passion with you. They got all these kinks but they are also a softie for you and they want you to hold their hand while you make them feel good or vice versa. Your person wants to put on show for you, I think they imagine it to last all night.
Advice Cards:
Bring something new into your life
Release what you do not need. Let go of some extraneous aspect of your life
Seek to understand from a place of connection rather than separation
Your guides and teachers are telling you that they hear you and are helping
Your spirit wings are unfolding. It is time to take flight!
Get clear about what you want
Channeled Song:
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Pile 2
Cards: Ten of Pentacles, Four of Swords, Queen of Cups, Ace of Pentacles, Three of Pentacles, Three of Swords rx, The Lovers, The Empress
Back of the Deck: The Hierophant
The first message I got almost immediately is body👏worshiping👏, SO STRONGLY. You live rent free in your person's mind Pile 2. Your body is absolutely on their mind like all the time. Late at night, they imagine taking their time with you, admiring every part of your body and telling you everything that makes you so beautiful inside and out. They would make sure no part of you goes untouched. Highly recommend yall listen to Butterflies by Michael Jackson cause the lyrics of the song are exactly how your person feels about you. Your person is so romantic, they want to treat you right and make sure you are comfortable and feel safe. Your person won't only think dirty things, they would imagine a whole life with you. They think about talking to you, enjoying your company, getting to know everything about you, your future together. My goodness Pile 2, your person is giving off such Jane Austin love interest vibes and it is everything. I don't think they want you to do any work, they just want to take care of you and make you feel completely blissful. They want to heal you with sex. They don't want to just sleep with you, they want to make love to you. Sex, to them is almost sacred and it's their way of connecting with you on a physical and spiritual level. I feel like some of yall have low expectations of people, maybe specifically when it come to sex and your person knows this and they want to be the person to finally make you feel satisfied in bed. Your person would listen to any idea you have (within reason lol), if you told them to be as rough as possible with you, they would do so without thinking twice because you asked. They just imagine being of service to you, like a knight in shining armour (which is kinda funny cause I didn't get any knight cards, but fr I am getting such knight vibes). Although your person imagines worshiping you all night long, I am getting part of them wants a reward for their hard work and they deserve one. But this reward could also just be hearing your moans and praises of how good they make you feel. This message is for my feminines, but your person imagines getting you pregnant, they absolutely have a breeding kink. They are a little possessive over you but I'm not getting in an unhealthy way. Your person is overall so sweet and they just adore you. I also kept hearing future spouse while doing this reading so if you are reading this with your future spouse in mind, this is confirmation.
Advice Cards (spirits wanted to give yall a few extra):
It's time to try something new!
No better time exists than right now
Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you
Release all attachments that do not serve you
It is time to challenge old beliefs
Be alert for your opportunity
Take a lighter approach and smile about all facets in your life. A smile reflects a heart at peace
Love is the answer to current situation
Channeled Song:
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Pile 3
Cards: Queen of Wands, Three of Cups rx, Eight of Cups rx, Seven of Cups rx, Queen of Cups, Ace of Wands, The Lovers, King of Wands rx
Back of the Deck: Nine of Swords
Quite honestly, your person's late night thoughts can seem very messy. Pile 3, I think half of the time, your person's thoughts are wholesome and loving. They fantasise about cuddling you, caressing your soft skin, taking in every aspect of you and tattooing it in their memory. They imagine taking as much time as possible, if they could they would spend all day in bed with you, making love and treating you like royalty. They imagine bringing you to tears with their mouth, making you feel like you are on cloud 9. They are soft and gentle and just want to enjoy each other's bodies. They would give the most beautiful compliments, making you feel like you have become one, you can't even tell where they start and you begin. And when you are done, they want to clean you up and sleep all day wrapped up in each other. ON THE OTHER HAND, they also have the freakiest fantasies. Yes, they want to make you cry but they want to watch you stain your face with tears from denial and their rough touches. They want to be ruthless and cruel. Yes, they want to touch you everywhere, but it isn't gentle and soft. They imagine griping you harshly, not worrying how much it may hurt, the pain would elevate the pleasure of the experience. Something that was once sweet and loving, more passionate and brutal. They want to try every position, see which one makes you the loudest. Thats not even including their words. Before they were sweet as honey and full of praise. Now they are degrading and humiliating, stuff you only hear in the dirtiest of erotic novels. They are preverted and the farthest things from wholesome. I sense your person has a lot of shame for thinking the more unholy thoughts and shame themselves for it. Although no matter what scenario they have made up in their mind, their actions only want to show their love for you and express how you make them feel. Also, they are very possessive of you, they don't like to share and want you to know that. In fact, this may be the cause of them thinking about their more kinky thoughts.
Advice Cards:
It is time to take appropriate action
A change in attitude toward the greater good could be beneficial
A powerful dream will guide you
Your body needs your attention
You are greater than your story
Create a plan and take the first step
Channeled Songs (you get two song congrats lol):
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Pile 4
Cards: Three of Pentacles rx, Nine of Cups, Ace of Swords, Ace of Wands, Ace of Pentacles, Ten of Cups, Ten of Pentacles, Four of Swords rx
Back of the Deck: Queen of Swords
For you my Pile 4s, I think your person actually has some pretty wholesome thoughts about you late at night. Not to say they don't have 18+ about you cause they do, but I feel like that isn't what is important to them with your connection and relationship. Late at night, your person is more of a softie and likes to think of your future together and maybe plan dates between yall. Your person imagines spending the whole day with you and treating you to dinner. I am picking up Superman from My Adventure with Superman vibes which is interesting cause I have gotten thoses vibes before in another reading so if you are interested I suggest reading Pile 3 of my What you will love about your future spouse reading and if you already read that reading this is just confirmation. Your person holds you in a high regard and with much love. They plan strategically so that you will fall head over heels with them. The lyrics to Only Girl by Rihanna keep playing in my head, but it's coming off more in the way of like, they want to make you feel like the only girl/boy/person in the world. So when it comes to more 18+ thoughts of you, I think your person either gets really embarrassed when they think these thoughts or worry that they are disrespecting you in some way by thinking these thoughts. But you really push your way into their mind Pile 4. While the Devil didn't come out, the card did make it's presence known to me and I think it has some significances in this reading, especially paired with the Queen of Swords, you are are like a siren to your person or the apple tempting Eve. Actually, I think they have had dreams like this. Spirit is showing me a sailor at sea losing their mind as they get sucked into a whirlwind, but suddenly, they hear the most alluring and inviting voice they have ever heard. That voice leads to an equally as alluring person that only pulls them closer, infatuated with this siren that pulls them in. I feel like your person has a dream that looks something like this about you. I feel kinda stupid cause I am just now realising that the energy of this pile is actually pretty similar to the MV that the picture is from, Peek A Boo by Red Velvet, I would definitely recommend you to watch the MV after this. I really feel that your person almost loses control of their body when they think of you, getting aroused just thinking of you. Your person may be a virgin or unexperienced and they don't want you to know. I am hearing they want to indulge in you, your scent, your body, the noises you make when they hit the right spot. It's like an addiction to them. I've gotten kind of jealous or possessive vibes from most of the piles and this one is no exception, but I don't feel like they would take too much action on it but I feel like their thoughts of you would get more intense, like they imagine dragging you away from whoever they are jealous of and making it so the only name you can think is theirs. They don't want to stop, even if you are begging that it's too much, unless you say a safe word, they ain't stopping. They want you to wake up sore and desperately trying to cover their marks. They give off such "I'll bring your daughter back before 7"/"They call me daddy too" energy lol. Also not a late night thought but your person either has a HUGE dick (Ace of Wands AND Swords, goodness gracious) or just has very attractive genitals. My mind was everywhere during this readings and I feel like this may be the same way your person feels about you.
Advice Cards:
You are healing at a cellular level
Bring something new into your life
You are much stronger than you think
Reflect on the state and use of your personal energy
Practice the pause
Release unhelpful influences and fears
Channeled Song:
(Also listen to Only Girl and Peek A Boo but spirit kinda shoved this song in my face so here ya go lol. But I also feel like for some of yall your person has a connection to music)
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Pile 5
Cards: Six of Pentacles, The Magician, The Devil, Page of Wands, Eight of Cups, The Fool, Three of Cups rx, Ace of Pentacles rx
Back of the Deck: Two of Swords
I think out of all the piles, this one has the horniest energy. Your person really enjoys sex in general. They might have a lot of experience, I am picking on someone who enjoys casual sex, they don't really need an emotional connection. You may have even met this person through a one night stand, I am not picking up that you know this person very well, maybe someone you met in college I am hearing. They could have also been someone you see often but never interact with. Whatever it is, your person can't seem to get you out of their mind. And quite unlike other piles, they are NOT shy about it. They want to make sure you know that they attracted to you. I heard "Why hesitate so someone can snatch you up? Why would I do that when I can make you mine now?" They have a lot of confidence and pride and I think that comes through in bed and in their late night thoughts. They are a giver to you, they want to make you scream and cry, they want people to complain in the morning. They are adventurous, using all their experience to maximise your pleasure. They want to try everything with you, every toy, every position, every place and see what feels the best for both of you. They want to talk to you the whole time, letting you know the effect you have on them. Very explicit words that they imagine would have you curling your toes and pulling them closer to you. They want to see you let go, I heard they may have a corruption kink. I feel like they actually have quite a few kinks, I think they will vary among all of you but spirit keeps telling me feet which might have something to do with the picture for this reading lol. So I don't think this next message is for everyone but some of you have a partner already and your person obviously dislikes this, but I think they imagine fucking you in front of them, I heard "letting them know who you really belong to". They want to steal you away from them. Your person is wild Pile 5 lol. I think you are one of the only people they have ever considered a relationship with outside of sex but also to enjoy each other and explore each other's bodies. Also not for all of yall but you or your person may be French.
Advice Cards:
There is an important message to be heard
Be sure to keep your promises, especially to yourself
Allow rituals to give meaning to your spiritual life
Remember that in universal law, all is well and fair
Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you
It is time to challenge old beliefs
Channeled Song:
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Pile 6
Cards: Seven of Pentacles, Nine of Cups rx, Four of Pentacles rx, Justice, The Hanged Man, Knight of Pentacles, Queen of Wands, The Hermit
Back of the Deck: Knight of Swords
So if you are already in a relationship or maybe married already, this reading is for you lol. This also is the only reading that I feel like it's more daytime thoughts than late night. Or more like they are thinking about you 24/7. I am picking up for this pile that your person may work A LOT, and would barely have time to spend with you. I also heard for some of yall, you guys already have kids together and never can find time to be intimate with each other. So I think your person just waits and waits until the day they can have you all to themselves. Their mind often wanders to the feeling of your gentle touch, the plush feeling of your thighs and sweet kisses exchanged between yall. I heard they could die happy between your legs. If you have a vulva they LOVE your vulva. They would want you to suffocate them with it and I heard sometimes when they are really deep in this fantasy specifically, they forget to breathe lol. They want to let you know the effect you have on them as you race through their mind. I heard "Did you know what you did to me at work? You made me suffer all day and now you have to help me out." They also want you to take care of them. They imagine you caressing them, cleaning them(?), and exploring them to help them relieve some some after a long stressful day. They imagine coming home and seeing you ready for them and all dressed up all perfect for them so they can rip it all and feel your body from the bottom to the top. They also imagine you surprising them at work, bringing them lunch and taking them away so they can spend all day with you. I really feel like that would be a dream come true to them, but it's like super unrealistic for yall, although if you could surprise at work, Pile 6, do it, that would make their month. They want you to praise them for all the hard work they do all day and make them feel special for a special night (although spirits are saying that they won't dislike some playful degrading from time to time.) Loved the energy of this pile so much, can't tell if it's you or your person but either way yall are cute.
Advice Cards:
You are intended to succeed. Align your actions with your highest dreams
Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you
Pay attention to the issue that time plays in your life right now
Yes, you can . . . Set it in motion!
Hold a positive outlook. You will see it when you believe it
Relax and feel good. You deserve more joy!
You are a natural teacher
Channeled Song:
Thanks for tuning in₊‧.°.⋆🫧•˚₊‧⋆.
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alllgator-blood · 1 month
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I s2g if you add the layers of these comic pages together, it's over 350 layers. THIS is why I don't do full color for my comics lmaooo- ANYWAY EVERYONE HERE HAS AN AU APPARENTLY, SO THIS IS A BRIEF GLIMPSE INTO MINE. I don't know what to call it yet but I'm thinking of calling it "famous prophets" because 1. I like that car seat headrest song, 2. it's about shamura who is prophetic, 3. it's about trying to outrun fate with the Power of Love (and failing. Like the song!!!). It takes place when all the bishops were teens/kids during the age of hundreds of gods at war, and were trying to survive as a family.
I'm really excited to work on stuff for it but it's all gonna be drawn out of order. Maybe I'll write a full explanation of what it's gonna be about when I have a better idea...I want to channel my eldest sibling angst in a productive way, and maybe establish a QPP between shamura and a completely random npc everyone forgets about <3 also kallamar is trans too cause I said so. I'll do a comic about it eventually. Instead of an absence of gender he has TOO much gender. It simply cannot be contained.
I like that nonbinary genders are normalized in cult of the lamb to the point where nobody singles anyone out for being a they/them, it's not like "THIS IS MY SIBLING SHAMURA. THEY ARE NONBINARY AND USE THEY/THEM. ALRIGHT BACK TO KILLING YOU", it's just like "don't you fucking dare make my poor sibling wake up from their nap to kick your ass. Cause they deserve better than this."
But at the same time I like having the freedom to be more specific, and say "shamura is voidpunk and their gender is best described as the feeling that overtakes you during the first snow of the year, when everything outside is deathly quiet". This comic is actually derived from the time I was walking through a forest that's been torn down for a few years, and came out to my little sister as trans. I must've been like 13 or 14 and she didn't really get it as a 10 year old, but it was better than my mom FREAKING OUT about me coming out. So it was a nice little bonding moment between just the two of us. I don't have a good memory so I don't recall how it went unfortunately...
Now, the climate is a little different. My sis tried out transmasculinity for maybe 5-6 years before feeling happier as a woman, my mom is trying to be Based and flaunt her Woke trans children, and my dad remembered "oh yeah trans natives have existed before colonization. Maybe me being transphobic is a product of my culture being erased" and has gotten better about calling me the right thing. I have a mustache (thanks pcos!!) and wear skirts and am not a repressed "tomboy" teenager anymore. But I can't help but wonder what would've happened if I could've been like shamura and just...been nonbinary without people being fucking weird about it. Or been born as a badass war god who will tear you to shreds before you can perceive my birth sex. I know they're fictional but they are my ultimate gender envy GRRRRR BARK BARK BARK
Here is the secret image for this post- I listen to mostly EDM when I draw cause it keeps the energy up, but as I was finishing up shamura's poetry part, I was like THESE ARE JUST KMFDM LYRICS so I made this
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hairmetal666 · 9 months
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Eddie's supposed to be writing. The guys, they all agreed they'd each come to practice armed with two whole new songs they could pick from to add to their set list at the Hideout. And he's got his pen, and he's got his most recent trusty Composition Book, and all his lyrics are fucking bullshit about golden tanned skin and honeyed eyes and tracing constellations in freckles and moles, pathetic lines about being twisted in bed sheets, and the hopeless love he found himself in.
For the fifth time in an hour, he rips out the offending page, crunches it into a tight ball, and throws it across the room.
He can't write about Steve Harrington for the rest of his life; spend his nights aching for the boy who established himself as a fixture in Eddie's life and then just disappeared.
The worst of it--the very worst--is that Eddie knew better. Steve was never his, not in any real way, no matter how many times they fucked. He's Steve Harrington. Straightest guy in Hawkins. Popular. Rich. Whole fucking life laid out for him on a silver platter. And Eddie fell for him. It's the Munson curse, he supposes; always wanting what you can't have.
It started the way these things usually do, "got any weed?" and "come back to my place, Harrington" and "I got this stupid job at the mall, meet me there?" and lying "hey, guys, can't make band practice, gotta help Uncle Wayne" and "Munson, I really want--can I kiss you?"
In every other fantasy Eddie's ever had, it ends there. Steve gets his kiss and they never see each other again. But Steve Harrington--he's full of surprises. It catches Eddie off guard, makes him want, makes him trust. Because it's not just kisses. It's hands and mouths and "anything you want, Eddie. Let me make you feel good."
Maybe it wouldn't have hit so hard--maybe Eddie could've stopped from falling--if Steve hadn't been so good. Bitchy, sure, but genuine and kind. Had this whole gaggle of junior high kids he babysat, like what the fuck. Would hang out with Wayne and shoot the shit about whatever sports nonsense was on tv. Harrington never was as mean, as spoiled, as superficial as Eddie suspected.
Then Starcourt. That's when it all changes. Steve stops coming around then, in the aftermath. It hurts, but Eddie tells himself it's for the best. Now, he knows it would have been.
Two weeks with no contact, and Steve shows up at his door in the middle of the night. Eddie winces at the healing bruises and cuts on his face, can't imagine how much worse they were to start. He steps aside, lets Steve in, plans to say that he can't be whatever they are anymore.
Steve kisses him. It's a hot, needy thing, wild with teeth and tongue, nothing like before. Eddie is helpless to it, helpless to the way Steve grinds against him, already hard. He should slow it down, check-in that Steve is in the right headspace for this, but Steve is moaning low in his throat and Eddie can't think.
They're in Eddie's bed and Steve says, "fuck me, Eddie?" and Eddie says "are you sure" because he can't stop himself. Steve rolls his eyes (beautifuly bitchy), says, "I need to feel you inside me, baby."
How can Eddie say no?
Eddie's never done this before, but it doesn't matter. It's everything--Steve is everything--he could ask for.
The next morning, he expects Steve to be gone. Thinks they'll never see each other again. But he finds Steve in the kitchen, in his boxers and Eddie's Iron Maiden shirt, making eggs and talking to Wayne like it's the most normal thing in the world.
The next month and a half are the best of Eddie's life. He and Steve spend more time together than they do apart. Nights at Eddie's trailer, in Eddie's bed. Days lounging at the Harrington pool and driving around the nothing that surrounds Hawkins. Sometimes they'll stop in the middle of nowhere, climb on top of the van, and just--be. Steve takes his shirt off, and Eddie traces their names in the sun-soaked freckles, thinking maybe he really gets to have this, have Steve.
It ends as quickly as it started. One morning in September, Steve is cupping Eddie's neck, pulling him in for a goodbye kiss, saying, "sorry, baby, gotta get home for my parents. I'll see you later tonight, yeah?"
Except Eddie doesn't. Eddie doesn't see Steve that night, or the night after, or the night after that. He stops coming around and all Eddie is left with is a broken heart and these piss poor excuses for songs.
He rips out the latest page, waxing lyrical about the wonders of August, and time slipping away, and the boy he'll never forget. Crumples it into a ball and bats it into a pile of junk accumulated in the corner of his room.
Eddie needs a break.
He flies into the living room, snatches up his keys from the floor by the coffee table, and flees his house and all those memories of Steve. It's not like he has anywhere specific to go, so he drives around town, with his windows down and his music up.
His tires screech as he rounds the corner to the video store and arcade. He's not planning on stopping, but honestly, maybe a few rounds of Space Invaders is exactly what he needs.
The van hasn't even come to a stop in the parking spot when his eyes fall on Steve Harrington. He's standing in the middle of the parking lot surrounded by a gang of kids (including some of Eddie's new little sheepies) and Robin Buckley. Steve wears a sunny yellow sweatshirt, tight jeans, and his hair is perfectly coifed, falling in an elegant wave. His hands are on his hips, mouth and brows pinched stern. He's gorgeous, perfect.
It's an assault, an attack, Eddie's entire body shakes as the months they spent together crash over him. He has the van in reverse before he consciously thinks to do so, flooring it out of the space hard enough to burn rubber.
The noise, the speed, it draws the entire group's attention to him.
His eyes meet Steve's.
Time stops and so does he, idling in the middle of the parking lot. For a second, one moment in time, Steve's face falls. His mouth loses that grumpy pinch, his eyebrows drop, his beauty transformed by grief, by fucking longing.
Steve takes a step forward, and Eddie hits the gas, van screaming out of the parking lot. He watches the group shrink in his rearview mirror, sure that he imagined the sorrow in Steve's face, anyway.
They're nothing to each other.
Never were.
By popular request: Part Two
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diazevan · 1 month
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Are we in the clear yet, in the clear yet? Good. [x/x]
[gifset description: 2 gifs from ABC's 9-1-1, including lyrics from 'Out of The Woods' by Taylor Swift.
Gif 1: from Season 7, Episode 4. It is a black and white gif of a disappointed Buck watching Eddie and Tommy leave for Vegas. The lyrics 'The rest of the world was black and white but...' are on the right hand side, the words 'black and white' are more prominent and are in a block letter font.
Gif 2: from Season 7, Episode 4. Tommy kisses Buck. There is a torn paper effect in the left corner, making the lyrics appear like a page from a book. The lyrics 'we were in screaming color' are capitalized. The gif starts black and white then fades into full color with bisexual flag colors overlayed (blue, purple and pink).
/end ID]
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its-time-to-write · 1 year
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hi! Could you please write something with like reader opening the door one day when Roy stars knocking for training but reader and Jamie aren’t open about their relationship yet? I think it would be cute xx
I also thought this was cute. Not sure if anyone notices/cares, but all my titles are song lyrics based ever so loosely on the vibe I am trying to convey. Thanks for another great request!
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what it is
Someone’s aggressively knocking on the door and as you roll over to check the time. It’s 4am, and you poke Jamie who is fast asleep beside you.
“Babe,” you whisper, “someone’s at the door.”
Jamie groans and mumbles something incoherent. As your eyes adjust to the darkness, you can tell something’s off. You reach out your hand and feel his forehead. It’s burning up.
The knocking continues and Jamie lets out another groan and says something that sounds like raining? Oh. Training. You remember he trains every morning at 4, but you’ve never seen who he goes with. He just kisses you in your sleep and is back right as you wake up for the day. 
You roll out of bed, grab one his sweatshirts from the floor, and pad downstairs to the door.
You swing open the door mid-knock. The man on the other side lowers his fist, looks at you all squinty for a moment, then says, “Who the fuck’re you?”
You return the look. “I live here. Who the fuck are you?”
The man scoffs. “No, you fucking don’t. This is Jamie Tartt’s house. Jesus fucking Christ, is he fucking blowing off training because of a fucking one-night stand?”
Oh. You know who this is. This is Roy Kent. You didn’t know he was the one training Jamie, but you guess it makes sense based on how much Jamie talks about him. It’s Roy Kent this, and Roy Kent that, and Roy says I need to eat more protein, and Roy said my hair looked funny today, does it look funny to you? 
You sigh. You and Jamie have been together for three months, and you basically live at his house. You’re really only at your flat to change clothes. You have a toothbrush, pajamas, and half a wardrobe at Jamie’s. Your books have started to make their way onto his shelves too, as you read them and then leave them for him to start. That was a little bit of an accident at first, after you left This Side of Paradise one night and came back to a different bookmark on page 34.
Anyway, Roy Kent doesn’t know you’re dating Jamie, or that anyone is. You suppose in his mind, Jamie is happily single, fucking around like the twenty-something year old footballer he is. 
Roy is still looking at you expectantly, so say, “I do live here. Why don’t you come in?” and hold open the door a bit wider. 
Roy’s face says fuck it, and he follows you inside to the kitchen. 
“Can I get you some tea?” you ask quietly, although Jamie can sleep through anything. 
Roy seems surprised by the question, but says, “Yeah, sure,” as he stands by the kitchen island.
“Jamie’s sick,” you say. “He’s still asleep upstairs. I doubt he’ll be up for training today.”
“Right, yeah,” says Roy, “I’m sorry, but who the fuck are you? Jamie’s not fucking supposed to be doing the whole one-night stand thing, he told me it’s too fucking distracting from training.”
You chuckle. “That’s comedy gold right there. Yeah, no, I’m not a one-night stand. I’m his girlfriend.”
Roy’s impressive eyebrows lift in shock, and you laugh again and give him your name. “Didn’t know I existed, did you? I’m not one for crowds or a big fuss. I told Jamie if we made it four months than he could start telling people. He was a little upset, but,” you shrug, “no point in making it a big deal if we just break up, right?”
You can practically see the wheels turning in Roy’s brain as he does the math.
“So you’re telling me that you’ve been fucking dating this little prick for three fucking months, and he hasn’t fucking said anything?”
You nod. 
“Fuckkk,” Roy whispers, “that makes so much fucking sense.”
You quirk an eyebrow at him.
“He’s been less of a prick recently,” Roy explains, “More considerate, been carrying around fucking books and shit. Not fucking flirting with everything that fucking moves. Thought maybe he was just taking beating Zava too fucking seriously.”
You nod and move to pour the tea. You and Roy both turn as you hear footsteps coming down the stairs. It’s Jamie, who is wearing a headlamp, pajama shirt, athletic vest, and a single sock. And, thank God, pants.
“Ready for training coach,” he says with a salute, but the action almost makes him fall over. He looks all pale and sweaty, with bags under his eyes.
“Told you he was sick,” you say.
“Fuckin’ hell,” is all Roy can come up with.
Jamie seems to notice you for the first time and breaks out into a smile. “Roy! Look! I have a girlfriend,” he says, words a little slurred while pointing to you.
It’s punctuated by a “Jesus Christ,” from Roy as Jamie wobbles, unsteady on his feet from his fever.
“Alright, mister,” you say. “Back to bed.”
Jamie frowns. “Always so mean,” he says. He does an imitation of your voice, “No Jamie, you can’t tell Roy about us. Yes Jamie, I know Roy’s your best friend. No Jamie, I don’t think you love Roy more than me.” He looks at Roy as you sling his arm around your shoulders, supporting him at his waist. He puts his fingertips on your lips as he says, “See what I have to put up with?”
You roll your eyes and suppress a smile as Roy says, “What you have to put up with?”
Jamie is so loopy right now. He lays his head on yours and smiles again. “Look at this. Me two favorite people, finally meeting. You should stay for dinner, coach.”
Roy rolls his eyes and shakes his head. You can tell he’s trying not to laugh as you both mutually decide not to point out that it is now 4:30am and dinner is a long, long way away.
“Let’s go get you out of those clothes and into bed,” you say as you start to lead him back to your room. 
Jamie casts a look back at Roy and wiggles his eyebrows. “Babe, you can’t just say things like that in front of granddad. Might give him a heart attack. Old people are such prudes.”
“Go to sleep, Tartt,” Roy says. He looks at you and says softly, “I can see myself out.”
You smile and wave with your free hand. “It was nice to meet you,” you say. “Hopefully we can meet again under more normal circumstances.”
Roy nods once and does what you think is a smile? He turns and heads out the door as you maneuver Jamie upstairs. Jamie Tartt has a girlfriend. And a good one at that. What is the world coming to?
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mvnsvn6 · 8 months
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Have a mini fic about Steve annotating books and Eddie finding it really hot🖤
So obviously, Eddie's a bookworm. Before he had any friends, he spent the better parts of his childhood at Hawkins Library after school and Hawkins Middle's library during any recesses and lunches. He constantly read books, this was before Wayne got him a guitar and before he got into dnd, and being a bookworm tremendously helped him fuel both of those hobbies later on. But before then? The library was like a second home to him. 
And so, recently founding out that Steve reads, like a lot, is something of a revalation. It's not that Eddie thinks the guy is stupid, but he figured the guy spent time doing other productive hobbies at home. But the guy reads, and as previously mentioned, Eddie considers himself a literature connoisseur of sorts. Writing book reports and essays were one of the few things he actually excelled at in high school. 
So anyway, he found out that Steve is a book nerd by finding one of Steve's books open on his bed. Not really the strangest thing that Eddie's come across in Steve's room if he's being honest, and not the biggest indicator of nerdiness, until he focuses his attention and acknowledges the bright colors sprawled across the pages. 
A burst of rainbow colors underlining what Eddie guesses are his favorite parts of the story or important stuff he wanted to remember. And obviously, Eddie has to ask him about it. and Steve explains to him that he has a whole color key and it's made up of romantic lines that make him feel warm, sad stuff that makes him tear up, stuff that is word for word undoubtedly Steve Harrington sprawled on a page. Steve won't tell him which color is which, too embarrassed by it, but he lets Eddie read through them, and then he stares at Steve in unyeilding fondness. 
The look reflected on Steve's is not the same, mostly anxiety and insecurity, which Eddie immediately wants to soothe. It's so so sweet he thinks but Eddie's mouth translates the words into, "That's so fucking hot." Which, shit man, it is but he hadn't meant to say it out loud. 
"Shut up, dude, don't make fun of me right now." 
And listen, books are everything to him, this is no joking matter. They inspire his own stories, whether through a dnd campaign or writing song lyrics. It's honestly probably the most attractive thing a person could do in Eddie's opinion, he didn't know how hot until right about now, but he'll die on this hill. Annotating your books is hot. 
"Listen to me when I say this Steve, while that is the nerdiest thing I've ever heard and I'm, ya know, me. It's also about the most attractive thing that's come out of that pretty mouth of yours, like ever."
And Steve folds his arms across his fucking beautifully sculpted chest and narrows his eyes just slightly, raising a judgemental eyebrow at him. 
"You're being serious."
Oh he's never been more serious about anything in his life. 
"Uh...yeah? Yes. Oh my god."
Yeah, real eloquent Edward. 
Whatever, his heart is pounding profuesely against his rib cage because holy shit Steve is a book nerd and Eddie wants to kiss him fucking yesterday. So he gets on all fours on Steve's bed to lean forward and basically attacks his mouth before he can even think about it. 
And when he pulls back, Steve's pupils are blown wide and his breath has picked up pace, and Steve keeps bouncing between looking at Eddie's eyes and his lips. 
"You just kissed me."
It comes out disbelieving. 
"Yeah and with your permission I'd like to continue, like stat, immediately, now."
"You're insane."
And hands weave through curls and pull. 
Eddie tumbles foward, ending fully sprawled on top of Steve, and, jesus christ, body pressed impossibly close to his. 
And after they're romantic, read: nerdy horniness, little makeout session, he forces Steve to read the annotations himself, going through all the books that are important to Steve. He has to stop himself from moaning to really emphasize how hot he finds it, and to make Steve slightly embarrassed, but refrains. Just lets him continue. 
Eddie has never been so in love in his life.
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phfenomena · 4 months
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❝watching the world from the sidelines.❞ || tom blyth x actress!reader
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| request - what about sidelines by phoebe bridgers with tom? i feel like that could be really cute. thank you!
| A/N - i love phoebe so much i can't believe i didn't think of this.
| WARNINGS - eating, heat, tom being a cutie patootie, a m*n serenading you, cringey fluff and an overuse of lyrics,
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i'm not afraid of anything at all. not dying in a fire, not being broke again.
your head was lying comfortably on the pillow that you call your boyfriend. he was currently reading 'call me by your name' to you and you hung up to every syllable that slipped past his lips. his eyes transfixed on the page while yours were wandering across his face, memorizing every feature you loved so dearly.
"why are you looking at me like that?" his voice didn't even register as his until you saw him look down at you. "like what?" you retort back to him, playing the innocent role. "like you're obsessed with me or something." he teasingly says as he smiles at you. you turn your head away from his and towards the trees and people walking in the park. "i can't even look at you right now, i'm ignoring you." you reply holding your hand up in the air blocking his view of you.
he chuckles and pushes your hand down. "you're so dramatic" he whispers while passing his hand over your hair, smoothing it out. you smile softly and soak in the moment.
had nothing to prove til' you came into my life. gave me something to lose.
"can you believe rachel chose us to dogsit lenny? i feel so honored." tom says as the dog tugs on the leash, clearly giving tom some trouble. you stifle your laugh at the dog pulling him across the sidewalk.
your sat on your sofa with lenny tucked gently in your arms as you both watch the movie you put on. well you're watching the movie, he's staring at tom on the other side of the sofa typing emails. you look from the dog to tom, and then back to lenny. "i'm getting the vibe that he isn't your biggest fan, tom. he's literally looking at you like you killed his family." you manage to squeeze out in between laughs.
i'm not afraid of getting older. used to fetishize myself now i'm talking to my house plants.
the watering can felt heavy in your hand as you watered the collection of flowers and herbs you grew indoors. “you’re looking so pretty these days.” you whispered to your basil plant. “you’re gonna make my tomato soup so good.” the praises to your plants kept pouring out as you watered them. tom leaned the kitchen doorway and watched you talk to your plants. these small moments remind him in all the way he loves you, and you just make him laugh.
not of being alone in a room full of people, watching the world from the sidelines.
you loved watching tom being in his element, and this was it. a movie premiere where he’s being bombarded with questions and interviews. you’ll stand off to the side and watch him answer the same question for the hundredth time, and it’ll never get old. on the rare occasion someone would ask you something, you’d just look to tom in hopes he’d answer for you. he’s telling the interviewer his favorite snack to have on set, but you’re looking at him as if he’s explaining the secrets of the universe.
your hand is wrapped around his bicep as you walk together and he’s telling you the easter eggs hidden in the movie. you nod and smile but haven’t heard a single thing he’s said, he’s just so adorable talking about his work. you haven’t had a lonely moment since the day you met tom, and you wouldn’t change a single thing.
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