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jaidenk-nox · 2 months

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Elizabeth midford

Shitty 2AM rant on the Misogyny that Lizzy has faced since the very start but it's the perspective of someone who has witnessed the horrors of Misogyny in Spanish speaking fandom

I should mention that English is not my first language and I'm not very good with it either, so most of this was done with Google Translate and I tried to correct what I could, I hope it's at least readable

I've never seen enough people point out the fact that Elizabeth midford character also defies the "Girlboss" archetype, she is definitely physically strong and can protect herself, but she is A 15 YEAR OLD GIRL, who manages her emotions like someone her age would and also exhibits many neurodivergent traits. I have always been bothered by the way physical strength is misunderstood as a "girlboss" trait, the simplest example I can think of is Ran Mao, she possesses brutal and superhuman strength. but it doesn't make her a girlboss, in case anyone forgets Ran is a girl who barely reaches 18 years old and is exploited by an opium trader who also seems to be involved in human trafficking (implied in the manga). Is she really a girlboss? girlboss when her physical strength is more of a requirement to SURVIVE while working as an assassin and sometimes seductress (which u can tell she doesn't enjoy much)? Obviously Ranmao's social reality is very different as she is a woman of color from the underworld, unlike Elizabeth, who is a white woman from the nobility. However, her physical strength has always been a double-edged sword for herself. Lizzy longs to get married, like any other girl her age, she longs to be protected but says goodbye to it the moment Ociel returns.

I may seem a bit exaggerated, but the way your sociocultural background affects the way you perceive and treat a character has me slightly traumatized, I wish I could give proof of the horrible and degrading treatment that Lizzy has received from the Spanish-speaking fandom.

I am a trans boy of color who grew up watching my female relatives being encouraged to rip their hearts out of their chest from the moment they turned 8yo for the simple goal of caring for and protecting my cis male relatives. household chores, cooking for them, washing their clothes, taking accountability for their actions. Their freedom and childhood as little girls were taken away from them. but none of that was ever valued, I never saw anyone recognize it as sacrifice.

Elizabeth is not a woman of color, nor does she have those demands as a woman of nobility, but she SACRIFICED stuff to try to protect Ciel on her own way, I have seen many people underestimate her backstory in book of Atlantic because "High heeled shoes aren't reason to cry." Everything Lizzy has done for Ciel is devalued, all her suffering has been minimized. losing so many family members in such a short time, losing the boy you were raised to marry your entire life. People truly forget that lizzy is still just a child, that she has the right to mourn everything she lost that day. She had to mourn publicly as a noble girl,she probably heard that she would never be able to get married or would never achieve happiness, I've never seen any adult to stop and think about how heartbreaking and soul shattering that must have been as a 11yo

I have seen how EVERY thing Lizzy does is judged. how her behavior, personality and temperament are criticized. but other characters like Soma just get a pass while doing the same stuff, but this does not just stop at gender, but also at age. people HATE girls and afabs who act like children when they are literally CHILDREN.

How is it possible that Lizzy has faced such harsh judgment from the fandom when there are other characters like Maam red, Lau, Grell, Undertaker who are universally ADORED or atleast respected in the fandom.

I love u Elizabeth midford but ur character makes me violently ill omfg

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altermay · 10 months

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Tw/ transphobia, discussions of dysphoria, brief mention of suicide, descriptions of child abuse

Getting unbearable. Feeling sick. Started working to afford hormones only to find out the service that is most accessible to me (plume) doesnt offer T in alabama anymore due to changing laws. Fuck all these stupid politicians putting their noses in others lives.

Thought people at work wouldnt make a super huge deal, as I was selective with who I told, so i thought maybe I could hold out a bit longer and at least i wouldnt have to feel so dysphoric all the time, since all my coworkers knew me as Monte. But then instead of my name, people who would usually call anyone else by their name started calling me “Miss” and “maam”

Even the ones I had come out to, and even the ones who told me they were accepting.

Whatever, im from a small rural area, so transphobia is not new to me, what is new to me, however, is being openly trans in an unfamilliar environment. I thought I could start T quickly and maybe people would ever forget that im trans in the first place, but now its been so long.

Some people call me He, and use the right pronouns, but increasingly lately Ive received a myriad of transphobia.

Being called tranny loudly while my coworker kicks my broom as I try to sweep (kicking hard enough for the broom to almost leave my hands and hit another person behind me) , Getting called “it” behind my back. Stuff like this is becoming more common.

The two coworkers who called me it, have been spreading lies about my work performance these past five days, Ive been told my three different people that every time I leave to go do something they start talking badly of me. So I got to my breaking point, at this point it had nothing to do with the pronouns, I was just upset that two forty+ year old adults were purposefully making my job harder to do while I was also struggling with a ton of other stuff (ptsd, seasonal depression, a family members recent suicide) and so I couldnt stop crying.

Despite this situation having nothing to do with me being trans, they are now trying to spread the narrative that Im just being sensitive because they were misgendering me while they were borderline bullying me.

If I was not trans, people would take me seriously on these issues. But now, because I am upset, suddenly Im just a stereotype. A sensitive trans person who is offended because someone used the wrong pronouns a few times.

I will be one to say, I do not give a SHIT about my pronouns. Ive been called the wrong ones my whole life by a majority of people. That was never the issue. But because Im trans, that is the only issue people can perceive for me to have. The ONE issue I had with them regarding my pronouns was them calling me “it” and thats not because its the wrong pronoun, thats because its DEHUMANIZING.

But now I have other coworkers who know NOTHING about the situation saying shit like “well if she claims shes a man maybe she should suck it up” “well if she wants to be seen as a man maybe she shpuld cut her hair”

Fuck you. How about YOU get beaten for 17 years, YOU watch your siblings get beaten near to death for 17 years. YOU have flashbacks of things you dont understand all day every day and we will see how fucking well youre able to “suck it up” you are WEAK. YOU ARE ALL WEAK. And you dont know what its like to be me. My mother tried to kill me. My mother almost killed my sister, I was neglected, never went to a doctor, and I STILL dont know how to take care of myself. And I still havent recovered all of the memories.

Ive had SHORT HAIR ive had LONG HAIR Ive had a MOHAWK, ive had a BUZZCUT ive been BALD. And people STILL fucking saw me as a woman. Im tired of conforming to this bullshit just so people can treat me the same as they always do

Fun fact though, since Ive had long hair Ive been gendered correctly by strangers MORE than I have with ANY OTHER HAIR STYLE.

These stupid fucking transphobes and their stupid fucking stereotypes im so fucking sick of it all. And corporate wont do anything about it, Im sure of this.

Why is it so hard for me to just live my fucking life.

Im so sick of it all

#vent #tw vent #tw transphobes #transphobes #transphobia #tw suicide mention #suicide mention #abuse #child abuse #neglect #tw abuse

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yun-fangz · 2 years

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omg hi you have returned 🙏🙏🙏

bro life is so 💀 I get u it's okay sending kisses 💖

about the concert jongho actually perceived me 🫣 did hand hearts 🫶 at me during soundcheck (was the only one with a jongho sign there in that corner before ga came in) with his adorable smile and chuckle I have ascended fr 🛐✨🧎🏻🙏🤸🏻 if u want vid it has to be dms cuz I don't wanna reveal my watermark on a smut account 😂 djdbsh

also girl don't feel bad if u only wanna write jongho for now, it happens to all artists to just have like a hyperfixation period we r not machines we gotta follow our feelings, and as I said there's not a lot of fics of him so I'll always eat it up even if I gotta read from the pov of a sub lmao he's my only exeption

I'll have to think of a real ask now cuz I feel like I'm spamming.. what are ur thoughts on threesomes and more 👀💦

I HAVE RETURNED KINDA 😭 ur right life is absolutely killer rn 🙁 not only am i working full full time but i'm also going through lots of personal family changes which is 💔 let's hope it dies down after the holiday season 🤕

THE HEARTS I WOULD HAVE DIEDDDDDDDD NO MAAM ! but yunho waved at me and i literally cried. i would die if jongho waved at me ever idk how ur alive !!

IDK I DO KINDA FEEL BAD THO BC I HAD FICS PLANNED OUT AND NOW I DONT RLLY HAVE ANY INSPIRATION TO WRITE THEM😭 like it's bad and i want to try but idk that's a rant for next time 🚶‍♀️

THREESOME AND MORE.... all i gotta say is 🚂🚂🚂🚂

put me in a room with more than one member and give me an hour, shit is going DOWN !! honestly though, yes. especially yungi 3-way or even yungiho 4-way SIGN ME UP 😜 i'll take anyone tho tbh LMFAO

#cjh.asks 🦦#tiny fantasies

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walkgleeshwalk · 2 months

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i just watched a video of this girl out w her friends to dinner at some fancy restaurant she then turns the camera to show empty plates and glasses and what not. i look closer to read that her “friends” all dined and dashed. she stayed, because she was too scared, now she talmbout paying for the whole thing herself.

……..listen linda, this gon go two ways. i totally feel her. that’s not my body, one of the worst things for me is being perceived as a bum bitch so i’m definitely not dashing at no place where they serving me delicious delectable food (unless theres an emergency, otherwise im out that hoe) cause u not taking my picture and embarrassing me by putting it on the wall like how they do at the beauty supply; no maam. one, ill take the holy route. ill pay, cause i got it like that. when i leave; imma line all my “friends” up and go one by one on how they gon get notta nan NUDDA thing from me, my time, my friendship, my compassion, my money NOTHING. because i wholeheartedly believe people who do that will have the conscience to do some wild shit to you! if they had the opportunity, and if they dashing which usually means u not diversifying your bonds. don’t let them get paid by someone to do you in, cause its a wrap.

two; im airing that whole shit. HER NAME IS MAKAYLA GRANT HERE HER NUMBER AND HER ADDRESS CAUSE ION GOT IT. when i tell you i literally had a nightmare about this shit one day im not even joking. like how am i anxious in my sleep? like dream me don’t eem play like that.

anyway; i hope yall really watch out who you let into your circle. i used to be surrounded by soooooo many people and at some point they dropped the ball w me. lied on me, talked about me, treated me like a bother, you fucking name it. after i prayed for discernment people was dropping like flies. from dec to now i’ve been in isolation or rather solitude. depending on my mood but either way no one was there. now that i’m about to come out of this phase of sitting and getting to know myself (against my will at first) i can see clearly now, like i wear glasses but the clarity i have is scary. music sounds different, my thoughts, my words. all of it is different. i’ll be damned if i sacrifice all of my hard work and abandon myself for the comfort of others who could in reality give two shits about me because they don’t give two shits about themselves.

in conclusion; i’d rather be by myself than partake in a minstrel show of who them folks want me to be.

#thoughts

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thedivinefish · 2 years

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TGIWednesday... You'd need a seance!

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Beyond Spectrum being a kabillion dollar conglomerate with just ok service and sky high pricing, we never dreamed the collections department would be calling us! Even more astrounding, the collections agent was calling for my father. When I told her, "You’re looking for my father not me." She said, “Will you give him a message for me?” I said, “Sure honey, we have séance’s every Friday night!” and she was like Huh? I said, “Maam, he’s been gone for 7 years and probably hasn’t had cable TV for 8 years, so I am pretty sure you’re past the point of time for collections on his account!” to which she hung up. So clueless are they that they called every day for a week and I just told them the same thing until they stopped calling. My father was at times complicated and he would have gotten the biggest laugh out of them calling me. And in my world, that’s him saying hello from the world of spirit where there is no charge for cable and WiFi is a whisper. This whole month is about Halloween, and clearing darker energies out of our way so that we can get the milk and honey part and aren’t we due for some good stuff? Yes, yes we are... and I am seeing you as my sweet momma would say “so richly blessed” as you read this now! When you least expect it, the odds of favor will be in your favor. ... And speaking of that... this email came in to us late last night as we were finalizing this week's TGIW... Keep the faith everyone!! "I’m one of those people who can claim that she never wins anything, that is until I bought your 777 MP3 and used your special bonus lucky 777 prayer! Shortly after I started using these gifts, I received a five dollar refund unexpectedly from a purchase I had made! But to top it all off, I won a $100 raffle ticket!!!I am so happy and so grateful to you, and I feel like I’m on a roll, as this is just the beginning of the new Lucky Me" - Barbara S.

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The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

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divinefishingtips · 2 years

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TGIWednesday... You'd need a seance!

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

~ INFINITE POSSIBILITIES ~

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Q AND A WITH JIMMY

Upcoming Zoom for October 26th

Next LIVE Zoom Event WEDNESDAY OCT. 26th 7:30pm Eastern (30 mins long) Pre-register at Calendly - Just $22 (includes reminders and replay) https://calendly.com/jmh-calls/october-2022-zoom

*NEW INSTRUCTIONS* Submissions are due to [email protected] by end of day Tuesday BEFORE the call.

Pre-Register Here - $22

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Radio replay link | YouTube | Apple Podcast | iHeartRadio | Spotify

Also coming up... Oct 19th - You Wealth Revolution Season 24 w/Darius Barazandeh - LIVE CALL Q&A October/November - Quantum Home Sanctuary Summit 9 w/ Helena Reilly

Watch and listen to hundreds of Radio Show replays for FREE here in the archives from the Jimmy Mack Healing Radio show.

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Fish Food

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**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers.

$19 Guided Energy Processes - MP3s

The 5 Anchors Process

The Purple Rain Process

The Magical Golden Key Process If you need a refresher on the basics of fishing...we've just revised the FREE MLF Training Kit with much NEW content. CLICK HERE.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

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-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.sandybidinger.com

Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

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365dailyaffirmations · 2 years

Text

TGIWednesday... You'd need a seance!

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

~ INFINITE POSSIBILITIES ~

From the Fish Box

Q AND A WITH JIMMY

Upcoming Zoom for October 26th

Next LIVE Zoom Event WEDNESDAY OCT. 26th 7:30pm Eastern (30 mins long) Pre-register at Calendly - Just $22 (includes reminders and replay) https://calendly.com/jmh-calls/october-2022-zoom

*NEW INSTRUCTIONS* Submissions are due to [email protected] by end of day Tuesday BEFORE the call.

Pre-Register Here - $22

FREE Live Appearances

Radio replay link | YouTube | Apple Podcast | iHeartRadio | Spotify

Also coming up... Oct 19th - You Wealth Revolution Season 24 w/Darius Barazandeh - LIVE CALL Q&A October/November - Quantum Home Sanctuary Summit 9 w/ Helena Reilly

Watch and listen to hundreds of Radio Show replays for FREE here in the archives from the Jimmy Mack Healing Radio show.

https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Anchors Away Masterclass

Watch the Video Now

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers.

$19 Guided Energy Processes - MP3s

The 5 Anchors Process

The Purple Rain Process

The Magical Golden Key Process If you need a refresher on the basics of fishing...we've just revised the FREE MLF Training Kit with much NEW content. CLICK HERE.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

Learn About Certification Here

TGIFunny

Forward

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.sandybidinger.com

Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

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advancedthetapractitioner · 2 years

Text

TGIWednesday... You'd need a seance!

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

~ INFINITE POSSIBILITIES ~

From the Fish Box

Q AND A WITH JIMMY

Upcoming Zoom for October 26th

Next LIVE Zoom Event WEDNESDAY OCT. 26th 7:30pm Eastern (30 mins long) Pre-register at Calendly - Just $22 (includes reminders and replay) https://calendly.com/jmh-calls/october-2022-zoom

*NEW INSTRUCTIONS* Submissions are due to [email protected] by end of day Tuesday BEFORE the call.

Pre-Register Here - $22

FREE Live Appearances

Radio replay link | YouTube | Apple Podcast | iHeartRadio | Spotify

Also coming up... Oct 19th - You Wealth Revolution Season 24 w/Darius Barazandeh - LIVE CALL Q&A October/November - Quantum Home Sanctuary Summit 9 w/ Helena Reilly

Watch and listen to hundreds of Radio Show replays for FREE here in the archives from the Jimmy Mack Healing Radio show.

https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Anchors Away Masterclass

Watch the Video Now

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers.

$19 Guided Energy Processes - MP3s

The 5 Anchors Process

The Purple Rain Process

The Magical Golden Key Process If you need a refresher on the basics of fishing...we've just revised the FREE MLF Training Kit with much NEW content. CLICK HERE.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

Learn About Certification Here

TGIFunny

Forward

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.sandybidinger.com

Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

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srafseeker · 4 years

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mary: theoretical physicist, ( metaphorical ) serpent . . .

#it rolls off the tongue v nicely...#maam i am Perceiving you..........#/* 𝙵𝚄𝙽𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 … out_of( ɥsɐp ) :: sorry‚ god can't come to the phone right now. */

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theygender · 4 years

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I'm considering the fact that I might have to get braces again if I want to fix my teeth for good but I already look enough like a 14 year old boy adhskdks I'm not trying to seal the deal

#i already have a hard enough time buying alcohol as is 😂#rambling #real talk i was considering using like smile direct club or smth similar bc those services seem pretty affordable #and the aligners arent very noticeable #but my mom brought up that i may not be a good candidate for them since my bottom teeth are so severely out of wack #and real talk if i cant get those im probably just gonna let my teeth stay as is #its not that im embarrassed about the idea of having braces again as an adult. i couldnt give less of a fuck #its that im worried itll make me look even more like a teenage boy adhsjsjs #and i literally already have enough of a problem with that adhsjdks #like before coronavirus hit i happened to go into a subway at the same time as a group of middle school / high school boys #and the person behind the counter straight up tried to put my sandwich on their tab adhakkdks #like maam i am a grown adult with my own money i dont need this teenager to buy my tuna sub 😂#like i dont care about the fact that people view perceive me as a guy so often #its the fact that they think im so YOUNG that gets me adhsjsks #god especially when im buying alcohol #do you know how hard it is to buy alcohol when your license says youre a 22yo woman and you look like a 14yo boy???#its so awkwaed adjskslsl

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karanoid · 4 years

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about top joe discord

LET ME ADDRESS A FEW POINTS:

There has been many fear and anxiety regardless the top!joe discord I made. I understand how it gives my discord a bad reputation. Somebody has kindly reached out to me to ask me addressing several points, which I’m now gonna clarify:

1. I am racist, I asked why, and they said mostly because of my dismissive behavior to people who called me out for drawing yusuf adorned in gold jewelry which made their friends feel unsafe. So, I am a muslim and was raised in a muslim household and community. I am fucking brown.

I didn’t say it because you don’t need to know that about me. What bothers me is how some people feel the need to come to my inbox informing me “maam yusuf is a religious muslim who prays 5 times a day and do all the supplementary prayers all while he drinks alcohol and fuck nicky in the dailies, he wouldnt be wearing gold maam no maam.” as if I didn’t know any better. so please, now don’t do that. If you care so much about the littlest details like wearing gold then you’ll also call out yusuf because he draws living beings and drinks champagne. yes it’s true muslim men are forbidden from wearing gold AND silk but let’s not forget, nothing in the comic and movies imply yusuf has ever been religious. It’s easier to see nicolo as religious because he was a fucking priest. Yusuf was a fucking merchant, it’s easy to see that he’d be less faithful because he would have been travelling and seen many kind of people to broaden his horizons and not contained to a little bubble of hyper religious community. However, let me remind you: whether yusuf AND nicolo are religious or not is entirely UP TO THE AUTHOR/ARTIST. It’s totally fine to make him religious and if you can respect it THATS GREAT, I ALSO LIKE HIM THAT WAY, but please remember it’s not even canon and hey sometimes I just draw things because I like the aesthetics. Also please, do not harass writers for getting a thing or two incorrect, even white people cannot get christianity correct, even between two muslims could be a disagreement whether this fic’s yusuf is problematic or not. I wouldn’t even expect anything more and THAT’S OKAY. Just don’t be an ass to muslims of color in real life and don’t fall into the believe that it’s a religion of violence. you can say that greg made him that way bc he knew nothing better but hey, I have no problem with that. again, it’s fine to make him religious, I’d be delighted but it’s ALSO fine to make him not religious.

2. I think that people only write Top!Nicky out of political correctness. OKAY. I apologize for this. I thought like this because I have accounts telling me that they were pressured into writing top!nicky or they wanted more readerships so I make a BIG assumption. I realized this is only a small part of switch and top!nicky fics and the big bulk of this must be out of genuine care. So yeah, I apologize for thinking that people only write top!nicky out of political correctness. I think writers should be allowed to write whatever they want. Yes this includes top!Nicky. And in whatever kinks they want it. However, this still doesn’t change that the discourses do scare people away from writing top!joe. Write top!nicky however you want, but stop vague-blogging about top!joe. racism isn’t inherent to top!joe and you can always remind people to be mindful with their writings but discouraging people from writing top!joe is not the solution.

3. Top!joe is racist and people in the discord are racist. Okay, I am gonna touch several aspects why top!joe discord is considered racist: (1) because I don’t like to switch them, therefore I am racist. Sorry that’s not how it works. I have a clear preference and that’s just how I roll. Besides, a lot of people in the discord (including me) think either they switch (because they are 900 yo) or joe just doesn’t like bottoming. I’m not the kind of people who refers to reality for fiction I consume but people who prefer to top or to bottom exist (2) i want to be away from accountability and responsibility. Nope. The reason I made it is because I wanted to gather people with same interest as mine.

4. I paint Yusuf as aggressive and the whole discord like him being an aggressive top. I think this is the only reason why the discord is seen in a negative light. Because wow what a coincidence that someone vagueblogged my discord at the day I celebrated about Nicky suggesting 20 years and wrote a post about how Joe is allowed to be angry. And beside someone made the WRONG assumption that we are focusing on Joe’s anger and violence (what). Okay, I don’t know how to break this down. But I will try. First, yes I was overjoyed at the news. Because I’m one of the people that do not like feral!nicky headcanon. I liked it at first bc it was funny but then it was twisted into Nicky being cold. So I don’t like it (lol), I still like it though but like I don’t seriously think that way. However, I never liked the idea that Nicky suggested higher than Joe. Because then his character just doesn’t click with me, there was a cognitive dissonance for me because joe clearly says nicky’s heart overflows kindness, you can see nicky as a medic in the credit montage. Also, from their body language and from the way the movie set em up, I think Joe is the one who suggested higher and I am glad to be proven right. Second, I did write a post about how Joe is allowed to be angry at Booker. People agreed with me, so I was not alone. But the reason I wrote that post is not because I wanted to paint yusuf as aggressive, but because I’m tired at people who think Joe shouldn’t display any negative emotions. I think it’s out of character. I do NOT think Joe is aggressive. That is NOT his wholeass personality. If you looked at my tog art tag, never once I portrayed Joe as anything aggressive. If I do, please show me. Third, people are conflating this with my post where I reblogged with a comment that implies aggressive Joe isn’t racism. Okay in this, the context is IN BED. It’s Joe being aggressive in BED. It’s literally BED ROLES AND FANTASY. I don’t even have a particular scenario in my head when I reblogged that, the original post clearly refers to bed roles with manhandling and kinks etc. like, why would you spank someone in public? Lastly, about the discord, NOPE, most people in the discord agree that Joe is either a GENTLE DOM or SERVICE TOP. But in my opinion, if someone likes Joe as an aggressive top (again, bed roles baby) I really don’t think it’s racism. It’s just... projection?

anyway, back to joe’s emotions, these are posts from a moroccan man (paragraph #7) and a brown woman whose posts I agree with. Let’s be real, people of color are expected to shut up in favor of white people’s fragile feelings.

Now, about racism in fandom. I understand the concern because muslim men are painted as violent and aggressive. You know what I will never forgive those radicals for taking away innocents lives and to leave a lasting damage in how muslims are perceived in the west. However, you have to keep in mind, Joe in the movie is far from being stereotyped. I mean, Gina and Marwan practically greenlit him? Now, you might have concerns that writers are gonna turn him into a walking stereotype which is... okay, I understand that concern. But the solution is to communicate this ‘hey I think you make him too stereotypical in this etc etc’ not “write more top!nicky AND shame top!joe” because again, top!joe is not inherently racist.

also some people mentioned that they hope I recognize racial bias in the ship. dude, that goes without saying, all aspects of your life will be influenced by racial biases. however, this kind of thing is not specific to fandom/shipping. Like I said I’m fucking brown, friends and families with facial features that cater to white expectation are treated better. I did say at the bottom of this post, yeah I did notice why it’s always a brown character who’s always openly mad. And that’s in itself a form of racial bias. Racial biases affect everyone, white or POC, it doesn’t matter. But I got an issue with how people think this is racism. like how convenient, if by falling to racial biases mean you are a racist then what about those white people who created this racial biases in the first place? and I noticed the persons who got the audacity to cry about everything in this fandom is white?? I mean okay, they don’t know what I am, but not everyone is comfortable with sharing their private information like ethnic group, faith, etc. what if they really don’t want to share it? Because like you said, racial bias, whether good or bad will affect me. Now, I don’t know what white people are feeling, I’m not white. However, based on my interactions with them. We’re all just people sharing same interest, it could be they fall into racial biases, but all we shared about are just regular HCs. Even people making a conscious effort to combat racial bias still in essence fall for racial bias. You just cannot escape it.

According to this post, fandom assumes that the bottom is the proxy of writers, I don’t think this is applicable to everyone but let’s just say it’s true and people tend to write about their projection better so I’m gonna assume the racism part comes from the fact that..yeah I do think the bottom usually gets more fleshed out as a result of them being the writers proxy, so somebody posted this in the discord which I agree because yes I do think there’s a lack about yusuf’s background especially when it comes to crusade era:

but since I know most writers aren’t muslims, to me it’s not so much about racism but they simply know nothing about it, and not always out of ignorance either but in this climate, if you get a thing or two wrong you’d get harassed. so *shrugs* I understand the reluctancy. But here’s the thing, this is not about top/bottom issue but because most of the fandom are white so they have more freedom in writing the white character. Anyway, plenty of people have projected themselves into yusuf already, the whole “top/bottom” thing in this fandom is not even a thing. Yes, some writers project on the bottom so if you prefer bottom!joe that’s fine, somebody in the discord is doing a research and it turned out top!joe wasn’t even a CLEAR majority in JULY. So clearly they got their share already?

so please, let’s stop with the vitriol. if people are preferring top!joe it’s clearly because of different preferences. it’s not that deep. it’s the same way with how some people are preferring top!nicky. But we’re being driven out based on a hypothetical scenarios? like what do you want? for us to cease existing??? don’t be ridiculous.

I know people won’t listen to me. So this is my suggestion: LETS JUST IGNORE THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE. LET’S ALL JUST AGREE TO DISAGREE.

#discourse #the old guard #joe x nicky #kaysanova #immortal husbands

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wexhappyxfew · 4 years

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shannon!! hii lovely 😊🌸🌸. 34-39 for the fanfiction writer asks?

KRYSTA GIRL THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU my supportive lil bean :) i hope you are doing well and that the prologue is treating you right, i know it’s a lil sad at the moment AHHH but im so so hype for you, but you know that AHH <3

34. How much of yourself and your life experiences do you put into your writing? What do you think your readers’ image of you is?

i put different parts of myself into my characters most of the time. for example:

charlotte - kindness (everyone deserves a chance)

hazel - innocence (innocent through hardship)

catherine - leadership (leading as a strong female)

lizzie - stubborness (making your mark and working for it)

and those are just a few of the basics, without even deeper context!! i always try to give good and ‘i’m working on it’ parts of myself to the characters to make them human, relatable and real to people in anyway i possibly can! bc that’s what makes a character truly for me. and my readers’ image of me? i guess sorta soft, maybe a lil innocent, too kind sometimes, a lil chaotic, and shy i guess, thats just how i perceived in the real world too, i’ll never know i guess LOL

35. How much has writing fic changed your life?

so i answered this for julianne, but fanfic has truly changed my entire life. i feel like i finally found my thing, my little place in this world where i can express my self in ways i want to express myself. i can show the world that maybe it’s not all darkness and sadness, but it can be creative, happy and positive and you can always find joy in the little things, especially like writing. writing has made me grow into the person i am today. my characters have showed me how to be a strong person in my own way, to accept my flaws, accept sadness, or happiness, or grief or fear. i’ve really seen a growth in myself, truly :0

36. Are there any fics or fandoms you’re embarrassed to have written or been part of?

no actually! if you can believe it! everything i’ve written or made an attempt it, i’ve always liked it or went along with it bc for everyone it’s just an idea, a little spark that might set off a flame! and every piece of writing is always something that can be amazing, bc some people in the world cant fathom writing. anything written for fandoms i feel can be amazing and worth it :)

37. Give an update on your current WIP - if you don’t have one, give a sneak peek to a title or idea that you have and would like to write.

OOOH YES MAAM!! ie, lizzie showing up a surgeon after chuck gets shot, ie her being a queen!!

" Hey," the surgeon said and Lizzie narrowed her eyes.

" Where were you? We've been waiting." she snapped, eyes cold. The surgeon sent her a look.

" You caught me in a smoke break." he said and Lizzie's gaze turned icy. Reaching up, she pulled the smoke straight from his lips and stomped it into the ground. Speirs, Tab and Gene watched the woman, her gaze like an ice queen's staring down the surgeon who stood cowering up at her.

" You could take some time to actually do your job," she hissed.

so basically don’t mess with lizzie or her friends LOL, this part is gold :)

38. What does your writing process look like? How chaotic is it on a scale of 1 (very tame) to 10 (you can’t handle this kind of chaos)?

10 10 10 10 10 can i say 1000? 10000? pure utter chaos, but hey it comes out good on the other side and im still here right LOL, but it works best for me that way HAHA :) but we all know this LOL

39. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

i think my ability to right emotion and description. i’ve really grown through my writing in making emotions seem so so real, where people can feel things and descriptions that can really hit the reader, ive seen some comments from readers say that before so i feel thats where i really pride myself. ANDDD, love, emotion, grief and sadness in war and how it is V A L I D to feel all those emotions in war and how it should be normalized and okay to feel those things. i feel people have been told if you feel emotions you are weak, but in reality i feel you are even stronger to even let that side of you come out, to love someone in their darkest times, or to feel such pain for someone you care about more than yourself, i feel i’ve really tried to make that a point in my fics, that those concepts are extremely valid!! <3

thank you so much for these asks krysta, i truly loved them so much, AHHH thank you! thank you! thank you! honestly some of my favorites! stay lovely <3

#writer fanfic asks!#ask about my writing!

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canisaysomethingg · 4 years

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Kind?

I always hear from a lot of people that I am kind. Most people will take it as a compliment and I do too, took that as a compliment for the longest time. Maybe I am the one to blame on why people depicted me that way because I always give multiple of chances, I always say sorry, I tend to understand things, I do not get mad, I am more inclined to be patient, I speak soft, I look so soft, I always say yes, and probably I smile under any circumstances. But you see, that’s just me. That’s just me being a human. The fucked up thing in this society is that our standard of kindness is so low that any natural humane acts are already forms of kindness. That’s just how I choose to live each day, and people mistook that for being kind. The worst thing about this narrative of kindness is that “kind people” are often perceived as submissive people. You can do anything to them because they will forgive you anyway. “Ah si maam sige lang mabait yan” I remember my friends getting irritated because I don’t get mad even though my students are disrespecting me, but I DO GET MAD. Who wouldn't? Every time people will treat you like sht of course you'll get mad, I just have my way own way of handling it. Pag nagagalit ako, nakokonsensya ko. Rather than feeling angry, I feel pain, that is why I am not talking at all. If you're kind you would forgive them anyway and I am not, because I do not forget the pain that people inflicted on me. I just stay silent about it. The problem is most people think that being silent is already forgiveness. Sometimes, I wish that people would just hate me, at least I know that they truly hate me. I envy the bad guys because atleast they know the real intentions of people upon them. Rather than appearing kind, and people liking you in exchange that you will live to their expectations. You see, I want to be genuinely kind you know, but the more I choose to be kind, the sadder I get. Now why am i writing this? i have this student who is graduating and i gave him a failing grade. The funny thing is he deserved that grade and yet i hate myself for failing him. he told me that he knew i am kind person, and this broke my heart to the point that im having difficulty sleeping. So pls stop saying that i am kind because it’s breaking me. Stop breaking me. Why do i even have to be a human, if only im a worm instead.

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egoludes · 4 years

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whats your number (i see ur tags on gifsets maam 👁) and gifted

cass please... you perceive my thottiness too much don’t @ me LMAO but ily all the same you’re amazing

which mutual am i - chris evans edition!

#asks.#cass tag.

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kitane-irl · 5 years

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Blogpost - Integration Post

This is it pancit. The paper to symbolize the culmination of a semester’s worth of SocSci.

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Towards the end of high school, I didn’t have much expectations for the future. I knew I had to get to college, get a degree, get a a job, but I never considered the specifics of that process. So when one specific came to me in the form of choosing a university and a course to study, I was stunted. I had no idea where to start and I had no time to think. Out of a whim, I chose ADMU, and BS ME. The safest option. Going into BS ME, I still had no concrete expectations. It was get through 4 years of college and get that degree.

Then Soc Sci came around. Like most things, I had no expectations for Soc Sci. I knew it was like a class I took in Senior High School, called Personal Development. And we did go through more or less the same topics. However, the more I progressed into Soc Sci, the more I became aware on just how unaware I am towards myself and the future.

Perhaps the realizations SocSci gave to me came in two areas. Myself as a person and myself as an adolescent. As an adolescent, I didn’t really know what it means to be in puberty or be a teenager in the modern day. I knew it was a confusing time, I knew there was some things I had to figure out, but majority of it I chocked up to time. I’ll figure it out in due time, I would always tell myself. In reality, I totally wasn’t figuring it out in due time, after all I had no guide on whether or not I was hitting the puberty marks. We discussed Erik Erikson in class it dawned on me that I couldn’t answer some of the questions the study presented for stages before adulthood. I realized just how lost I was on where I was. I began to rationalize at this time. I told myself I’d let society decide for me, and for a time I was totally fine with that. Then we came across Mahler and Blos’s theories on individuation and just how important it is for development. Although we discussed in mainly in terms of separating from parents, I saw it as a point where I could start thinking about myself more.

So, in the middle of the year, I was faced with a lot of dilemmas. I didn’t know what I wanted in life, nor did I know much of what I can do. I would think whether I was in the right course, or better yet, the right school.

As an individual, probably Goffman’s study on Dramaturgical Stages is the one that hit me the most. I placed myself as an actor in the dramaturgical stage. I couldn’t see whether or not my actions were contrived or natural. It’s like I can’t figure out the difference whether or not I’m on stage. I couldn’t tell you what identity I have or wanted. I tried making sense of that. I came to Gecas & Schwalbe’s Beyond the Looking Glass study. Tried placing myself behind the mirror. Was I really who I am? How much of it is perceived by my friends and family?

It’s a lot to unpack, but one thing I realized in the end is that I fit the exact criteria the studies showed for teenagers. The same types of problems. The implication of this is that this isn’t something unique to me, and that everyone has these struggles. It isn’t some complicated problem only I have and struggle with, but something that’s totally normal to have. That alone, soothed my anxieties.

I didn’t particularly enjoy SocSci. It wasn’t my favorite class out of my freshman year. I thought it was boring and overcomplicated, and I always felt disconnected with the lesson.

But it was only in reflection did I realize just how much we covered regarding teenage struggle, and just how much of that related to me. Although it isn’t my favorite class, I think it’s one of the more important ones I’ve taken yet. Perhaps I don’t like it as much as I am grateful, is because this class has gotten my psyche working harder than ever, and as a teenager, it’s quite uncomfortable to explore myself at this level.

Overall, I feel I know myself more, or rather I know just how much I don’t know myself. In the end, that’s alright, because it’s from knowing is where I can start changing.

*ps. thanks maam for teaching us and for being super patient when we were all being a little too immature for being Ateneo’s best and brightest. Also the slides helped a lot making the complicated readings super digestible. Probably would have failed not for those slides. :DD

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holaafrica · 7 years

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New Post has been published on http://holaafrica.org/for-ebony-and-for-bad-gyals-everywhere-a-feminist-tribute/

For Ebony and for Bad Gyals Everywhere: A Feminist Tribute

By Rita Nketiah

I didn’t know Ebony Reigns -not in any concrete way. We didn’t school together or share a circle of friends.

But I felt like I knew Ebony Reigns.

I recognized her in ways that I might recognize younger versions of myself. Ebony felt familiar. I have been following her career since her first major hit single Kupe* -an up-tempo jam about a suspicious lover who she demands more honesty and accountability from. The glossy video displays a dreadlocked Ebony navigating daily life with her male lover in their home, interspersed with sensual scenes of Ebony reflecting on the lack of respect, care and accountability that her lover provides.

youtube

The chorus chimes “Nd3 wo b3 ti Kupe”** – a declaration of Ebony’s frustration with unrequited love. We see Ebony’s lover sneaking off to make private calls and we know that he occasionally goes to Kumasi under the guise of work meetings, only for Ebony to find out that he spends time with another girl named Belinda. On the surface, this song is just another tale of a woman chasing after a man that clearly does not want her or feels no sense of responsibility to their partnership. In the context of Ghana, men’s infidelity is often expected and rarely sanctioned; it is not uncommon to hear of wives who are well aware of their husbands cheating ways, but continue to stay for the kids, the resources, the social status of being married or the general pressure to maintain the status quo. However, for me, this song, and Ebony’s particular demands, reflect the possibility of a feminist defiance to this cultural expectation.

Quite frankly, Ebony was not here for your opinions of her. She couldn’t care less about your respectability politics and appeared to live life on her own terms.

Similarly, in Date Ur Fada, Ebony tells her lover that she will do almost anything to win and sustain his love -with the stipulation that if he breaks her heart, she will date his father, ultimately to seek revenge. This bold and comical statement is a testament to Ebony’s fierce, resilient and justice-seeking spirit. While one might interrogate the pettiness of responding to heart break by dating the offender’s father, in the context of a patriarchal country like Ghana, women seek power and emotional justice in the ways that they can. Rather than retreat into herself, Ebony seeks emotional justice in a vindictive act. It is significant that she feels she is able to challenge the emotional abuse of a cheating spouse through a sexual act with the perpetrator’s father. Quite frankly, Ebony was not here for your opinions of her. She couldn’t care less about your respectability politics and appeared to live life on her own terms.

As far as I could tell, Ebony was not a feminist -at least, it was never something she declared. And we certainly don’t know what she could have become had she lived on. However, songs like Turn on the Lights reflected what was possible for a feminist sexual expression for young women in Ghana. The song is a confident, braggadocious statement of body positivity, encouraging her lover to keep the lights on during love-making as Ebony is not shy or uncomfortable with her body.

youtube

There is often a perception that Ghanaian women are frigid or too conservative in the bedroom and certainly not comfortable with making love with the lights on. For Ebony, her body confidence allows her to challenge this construction of Ghanaian femininity in ways that we might consider feminist. Turning the lights on functions as a metaphor for her deep level of transparency, honesty and openness about her desire for sexual and bodily expression.

Existing in a hyper-masculine and hyper-sexualized industry in Ghana can be a bit of a mindfuck for women.

Admittedly, I have struggled with the new wave of dancehall music in Ghana as a reflection of a continued “de-Africanization” of our art. I sometimes feel that the rise of this genre demonstrates the increased capitalist pressures within the Ghanaian music industry to create music that is more “worldly” or globalized. I am also challenged by the appropriation of Rastafarianism within Ghanaian dancehall that cheapens the spiritual and political purpose of the faith. Ebony was not exempt from this critique. But still, it is significant that she was able to sustain a strong, healthy brand within the context of a male-dominated dancehall scene in Ghana. While I do not want to assume that the average Ghanaian girl can access the sexual power that comes with being a celebrity, I do think that Ebony’s image offered us something different. Existing in a hyper-masculine and hyper-sexualized industry in Ghana can be a bit of a mindfuck for women. The daily pressures to perform sexiness for the male gaze is even more complicated when one actually has their own desire to be sexual in their image.

Was Ebony’s image actually liberatory or did it simply reflect the non-choices women have in mainstream patriarchal entertainment industries? I don’t seek to romanticize the challenges Ebony would have likely experienced, but I do wonder if we oversimplify the matter when we do not recognize her moments of agency.

And Ebony was never created in a vacuum. Her image was made possible by the women who came before her such as Mzbel in Ghana, Tanya Stephens in Jamaica and yes, even Beyonce! There is a legacy of women artists who challenge the space made available for them in the music industry. Ebony was everything she wasn’t supposed to be. She was brave, daring, courageously sexual and in her words, a 90’s bad gyal.

Her death hits me hard.

For me, she represented the defiance of young womanhood. It was controversial, demanding, compelling and rooted in a Ghanaian experience. Ebony represents for me what is possible in a liberatory sexual politics for Ghanaian women. I didn’t agree with every song she sang -her messages could, at times, feel counter-feminist or downright tacky. But overall, Ebony’s presence in the music world signalled a new wave of bold, outspoken and clearly articulated sexual politics of young people in Ghana. Whether she was challenging us to fight domestic violence in songs like Maame Hw3 or she was reminding us of the depths of her pettiness post-heartbreak in Date Ur Fada, Ebony was never one to shy away from strong opinions. In a socio-political climate like Ghana, this matters.

Ebony mattered.

Her popularity was the constant reminder to me that, indeed, we are not as socially conservative as we claim to be as Ghanaians. Nor should we be. The tattoos, piercings and scantily-clad clothing choices signalled to many conservatives that Ebony was “spoiling the youth”, when in fact Ebony existed at the cross section of sexual expression, empowered defiance and Blackgirljoy.

As I write this, I am sitting in my hotel room in Bangkok at the tail-end of a week filled with strategizing and organizing around sexworkers rights. Upon reflection of the challenges surrounding the fight for labour rights for sexworkers, I am continuously struck by common prohibitionist arguments that often position female sexworkers as needing to be rescued from a life of sexploitation. I have written in other spaces about how anti-sexworker laws affect all women who may be perceived as promiscuous, non-respectable or loose women. At the heart of the debate about a woman’s right to sell sex is the underlying patriarchal belief that women should not have the right to monetize or control how and when she engages in sexual expression. To be honest, I don’t know if Ebony would have supported sexwork. I don’t know much about her political consciousness. But I do know she provided a space (where before there was none) for young women to express sexual desire in ways that were unfuckwithable.

I am not sure what happens now. But I know that she will be missed and that what she did for our notions of femininity and womanhood in Ghana will be felt for years to come.

This is for Ebony, who taught us all how to be 90s bad gyals.

Reign in peace, chale.

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*Not to be confused with her first actual single, “Dancefloor”.

**Today you will hear kupe!” –while I wasn’t able to find the exact translation of “kupe”, the general tone of the chorus suggests that she aims to set her lover straight.

This was first published on Drama Queens website.

*leave a comment on the post, you can write it under a different name and your email will not be published.*

To submit to HOLAA! email [email protected]

#body positive #Ebony Reigns #Ghana #sex positive #Politics &amp; Lifestyle

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