#man i didnt even get to do the bit that this whole thing was built around

[chickenoptyrx]

This is goofy and I cannot stress enough that I have no gd idea what i was doing. But. Since I think iv abandoned this:

Turles and crew tryin to convince gohan to join them via musical number :]

(Song is 'professional pirate' from muppet treasure island)

[xochosoxo]

the best patient ✮ | e.jaeger

MDNI-> warnings: afab reader, nurse!y/n, erenbrokehiswrist, cheater!eren, stoner!eren, dealer!eren, (pretend hes also a metalhead bc i love metalheads. and toxic eren oh my god its unhealthy), mentions of weed, blowjobs, hairpulling, missionary, cowboy, multiple creampies, dirty talk, eyerolling, tit sucking, hickies, pussy eating, cum swapping/sharing/consuming, squirting (cuz it wouldnt be a dysaren fic without squirting!), erens gf visits.

a/n: sorry im so inactive im actually so busy like all the time :( (save me.) anyway, enjoy this quick fic i wrote instead of doing my assignments!! i am a sucker for toxic,cheater,stoner,dealer,metalhead,has piercings eren. based on a scenario that i created with a character.ai bot ( i am ashamed.. it was a xiao bot.)

"hello. im nurse y/n and ill be taking care of you for the duration of your stay here." you say, walking into the ER patient room as you scan my clipboard for the details of the person staying here.

Name: Eren Yeager

DOB: March 30 XXXX

Height: 6'0 ft

"weight, ethnicity blah blah... reason of hospitlization: distal radius fracture..." you read to yourself, glancing up from the clipboard to meet eyes with the man in the hospital bed. his long brown hair was up in a messy bun, he had tattos running from his neck all the way down to his arms, and from what you can tell, he was built, rather... nicely. (he was buff asf.)

the man looked miserable. he had swollen undereyes, and his skin looked dry, but still, for some reason you found him incredibly attractive.

"hello nurse." he mutters, clearly tired.

"hello." you repeat again. "im just here just to check up on you." you explain to him, sauntering closer to his bed.

you flip the page on your clipboard to a new, blank sheet. "i will just be running some tests, checking your vital signs and see how you are healing."

eren nods compliantly.

you take that as a sign of consent and start writing some things down on paper. "he seems to be doing fine...even his arms are nice fuck." you get distracted, looking at his arms, the way the veins pop out. mentally youre drooling. his fingers are long and thick, and there are indentations of multiple rings on them which only gets you more excited.

you flip your page back to the information sheet from before, checking the notes: "frequent smoker and sexually active."

"so it says here you are a frequent smoker?" you ask him, just wanting some sort of confirmation from him.

eren nods again. "yes" he whispers. "some nicotine but mostly weed."

"oh i see." you say, writing that information down.

"i can get you some. once im out of here at least." he looks up at you.

"im sorry?" you mustive heard wrong...right?

"ive seen you around before." eren explains. "at parties...you know mostly smoking. like that last one...you were with jean and connie."

oh. you didnt hear wrong.

three days ago, on your day off, you had went to a party with your friends jean and connie. they said it would be a good idea since it would be a chance for you to finally relax from your stressful job, so you relunctantly went. that was your first time smoking weed. it was wonderful and you guess eren saw the whole thing.

"you must have it wrong... i dont typically smoke." you explain to the brown haired man.

"i know, jean and connie told me it was your first. looked like you had a good time though." he smiles tiredly up at you.

you were taken a back a bit. you didnt know that the two of them knew eren. do they know that he's in the hospital right now? are they the reason he broke his wrist? where were they?

"i see..." you ponder a bit. "are they here with you tonight? somewhere in the hospital i mean."

"yeah. theyre here with my girlfriend too since she's the only sober one who can drive at the moment... they just went back to my place to grab some things for me before you came in. they wont be back for a while." eren clarifies.

"goddamnit he has a girlfriend." you sob internally.

"thats good to know." you fake smile, looking back at your clipboard. "it says here youre also sexually active... are you taking any sort of pills perchance?" you continue with your questions, trying to get back to professionalism.

"nope its all just me." he giggles with a coy grin on his face. youd hate to admit that his laugh turned you on a bit.

you finish up your report of eren, rechecking his vitals once more to confirm things. "okay it seems as though youre on the right track... it can take up to 6-12 weeks for your wrist to comepletely heal. otherwise, you might want to lay off the weed consumption till then." you finish up.

before you can leave, he call out. "wait.."

you turn around. "what is it? are you alright?"

"i have a problem with something and i just cant seem to be able to do it myself." eren tries saying shyly, but the look in is eyes seemed to be more sinsiter than you thought. "after all... i did just break my wrist..."

he looks down at his jeans, putting the spotlight on the constrained buldge in his jeans.

youre flushed. "oh..." what were you supposed to do in this situation?? didnt he have a girlfriend?

right he had a girlfriend.

"im sure your girlfriend can help you out with that."

eren's eyebrows crease. he did have a girlfriend and she was amazing. she did basically everything for him. so why now was he so damn attracted to his nurse to want to take a risk and cheat on everything he had???

he presses his lips together before speaking, "i lied. i just didnt want to seem like a pussy to ya." sentences were forming right as he was speaking them. hopefully it was enough to fool you. "please. its so uncomfortable..."

his throbbing cock was being compressed by not only his boxers but also by his black rocker jeans. it was true. it was extremely uncomfortable so why not relieve it with the cute nurse who also happened to be the cute girl who had been sitting with his friends not too long ago, taking a drag from a joint he sold to jean and connie.

you were relunctant, but then again, you could feel your panties getting damper. you walk up to him slowly, keeping your eyes locked with his. you sit down on the bed beside him.

he feels your soft hands on his buldge and from that he lets out a restrained sigh. "fuck." he huffs.

god, there was no way this wasnt turning you on too. eren knew that. he saw the way you bit your lip as you started to unbutton his jeans.

"how long will they be gone?" you ask, hinting at the group of friends eren had mentioned previously. "for a while.. my place is pretty from from the hospital." he watches you slowly pull down his zipper. "fuck baby youre making me go crazy."

you smile, finally releasing his cock from his boxers. he was hung. youre eyes widened and he lauged.

"too much for you baby?" he questions.

"no..." you whisper, slowly kitten licking the tip, tasting his precum before fully sheathing his cock in your mouth.

eren moaned. loudly.

"holy shit!" he huffs. "oh my god..." he leans his head back, grabbing your neat ponytail to guide you while sucking him off.

"ugghhfff!" you choke on his length, tears coming to your eyes. but you like it. it felt too good. at this point, your panties were soaking wet at this point.

"fuck baby you gotta stop or else im gonna cum." eren gasps, pulling you off from his dick. "cmon take it all off... show me."

you look behind you to make sure that the door to the room was closed. you look back at him with a playful look, pulling off your uniform and undershirt to reveal your cleavage.

eren smirked, watching as your skin reacted from the cold air, goosebumps forming. he reaches behind you and releases the hooks of your bra.

he sighed at the sight of your tits. they were beautiful. you were beautiful. he kneads at your chest as you remove the rest of your garments, underwear included.

you were fully exposed to him. internally, eren was freaking out. externally, he was entranced by your body, drooling a bit.

"eren?" you ask, waving your hand infront of him. he snaps out of his trance. "are you ok?" you look at him with a worried look.

"im ok baby. sorry. lets keep going." he says, rubbing his tip on your clit. he can feel your wetness and he smirks once again,

"you are dripping baby..." he whispers in your ear. "i dont even need to prep you..." eren slowly shoves his cock into you.

you were in heaven. both of you were. to him, you felt so fucking tight. he doesnt even know if youre a virgin or not. how couldnt you be? "youre so tight..." he groans, restraining himself from prematurely giving you a creampie.

you have never felt so full in your life. in your life, you've only fucked one guy and the rest had been occupied by your plethora of sex toys. but eren... eren was different. you were filled to the brim. eren could see the buldge of his dick lightly poking through your pudgy tummy. that made him go feral.

he started thrusting into you faster, sucking on your sensitive nipples, licking around the skin as well. he left mulitple hickies in the places where only he could see them. you still were on your shift of course, he wanted to be courteous.

"mmm..." he heard you sigh, smiling as he kissed your body.

eren lifts you up so now youre straddling him. he keeps his pace constant but you wanted to take control. so you start bouncing on his cock. he watches as your tits move with you, again trying not to prematurely cum.

"mmmhf!!!!" you try to conceal your moans, but it was so hard. "fuck daddy please!! i need more!!" you were being greedy, but it felt too good.

"youre bossy baby." eren laughs. he thrusts up, faster than before. "fuck im gonna fucking cum." you watched him gasp, bringing your face closer to his, kissing him with so much passion. he kissed back.

sure he had a girlfriend, but maybe now he's finally gonna break it with her. just for you.

"ah ah..." you gasp, feeling his thrusts slow down. you whine.

"shush baby, let me cum inside before i fuck it back into you." he moans into your neck, creampie-ing your cunt. you try not to scream as you feel the heat in your stomach release as you cum as well.

your eyes roll back into your head and oh how he loves the sight. yeah hes all yours now.

eren picks up his pace once again, like he said, fucking his cum deeper into you.

you scream before he slaps a hand over your mouth. "shut it baby... dont want everyone hearing how much of a slut you are."

"mmfgf!" you groan in protest.

eren doesnt stop his pace until he's shooting his thick load into you once again.

he's catching his breath as he pulls out, plugging your pussy with his fingers so the essence wouldnt leak from your cute slit.

youre all fucked out by the way. he watches as your face contorts into pure pleasure, feeling the band in your stomach snap as you twitch on his fingers.

eren shoves his mouth onto your pussy, licking up the mess in between your legs, tasting both him and you. he licks up your slit to your clit, flicking it with his tongue. youre overstimulated and tired. your couldnt take it anymore. you gush once more on his face, the liquid dripping down his chin and onto the sheets of the hospital bed.

"aahh..." you breathe heavily, recovering from your third orgasm.

"that feel good baby?" he says, bring his head up to meet your eyes. he could see hearts in them.

"mm... i think we're going to have to change the sheets." you giggle.

"well it was worth it." he watches as you sit up, making sure youre not in any discomfort. he rubs your back and fixes your hair. "you look beautiful like this."

"do i?" you say, questioning his taste.

he nods before leaning in for a comforting kiss. "let me take you out." he whispers.

you nod-

KNOCK KNOCK!

you glance behind you to look at the door.

"eren! its mikasa!" you both hear from the other side of the door.

you look back at him in confusion. "mikasa?"

he rolls his eyes.

"my girlfriend."

[beetlebug-bii]

Part 3 of feral mc but with Belphie being released from the attic. Just imagine Belphie trying to kill mc and they just bite him. Not even Barbatos could handle the child so I highly doubt Belphie could either lol.

Feral Child Mc (part three)

MC Gets Betrayed & Bombastically Side Eyed Their Way To Beating A Bitch.

A/N: I like my writing to be nothing short of silly goofy, i also wrote this at like 4am two weeks ago and was so surprised to see it in my drafts. Did i proof read it? No.

Enjoy anyways💕

Now, you have been a menace since you've arrived

Only truly unstoppable by Diavolo, Lucifer and Barbatos on a good day

Today

Was not one of those days

No

Not at all

You see

Late in the night after being very snuggly tucked in

And then duck taped to the bed

And then your pajamas stapled to the bed

And then tied to the bed

In their defense

Not a single brother has gotten a single decent night of sleep

Not since Mammon awoke one night to see your little face peeking out from the vents

You screamed at him and launched from the darkness, stealing his sun glasses before scrumbling deep into the walls

no one has ever heard Mammon scream so loudly

Needless to say they were pretty fucking done with your scrumbling

Besides, they tied Satan to the bed and look at him! A totally chill and normal member of society :D

Anyways you were built different and managed to escape

You had to check on your little friend in the attic after all, it had been a few days

Upon going in, you glared at eachother for exactly three minutes and fourteen seconds

Before he started the whole sweet act on you

"Awh hey, you can let me out now right? You can do that? Whose a good little human?"

Offense taken

You werent a dog

though you wont lie and say you havent growled back at Cerberus before...

No you know what

Who does this man think he is?

You are a child with 6 of the deadliest pacts in the world!

...

...

...

Wait a second

Who thought that was a good idea

Genuinely

You are feral

A monster

The other students at RAD cower before you

You made the Angel's cry

YOU CHOKED BARBATOS WITH A SHOE LACE

WHO IN THE 7 CIRCLES OF HELL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO MAKE A PACT WITH YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

well whatever it's not like this is gonna come back and bite you

But you werent gonna release the bitch from his kennel

Not without a price

Mammon would be so so proud of you!

It took a lot of back and forth, but he promised 12 firecrackers, a new plushie, and a trip to the candy store

Hell yea candy

Open up oh magic lock

Oh he fucking kicked you across the room

Well that's not fucking candy

Lying prick

So this fucking incel loser started ranting about something or other

To be honest you didnt care

In fact you decided he didnt get a monologue

You were pissed off

You freed him

Were you the embodiment of capitalism while doing so?

Maybe

But that doesnt mean he can just hit you

Like

You have such a cute face

He's just mad that you're the baby of the family now

And that thought gave you a great idea!!

"I'm telling Lucifer"

Would have been your final words

Had you not been

Well

You.

Next thing you know he's chasing you down the stairs, grabbing you and choking you out

Which

Not gonna lie

Was a bitch move

So you kicked him square in the jaw and started screaming, just like papa lucifer taught

Stranger danger kids

Dont release strange men from the attic in exchange for candy

It's not worth it and they are lying

So obviously you pissed off what's his name

You're pretty sure its bitch boy

Anyways so you pissed off bitch boy and he started trying to stab you with a chair leg

Which was like

So rude

And the others were like bro stop

Except more panicked you're pretty sure but you werent a crybaby bitch like this loser so you know

You had to go for the knees

You slid around him, kicked him in the back of the knees

This wasnt your first rodeo

Apparently

Because you climbed on the demonic cow and grabbed the horns man

You were holding on for dear life before you just bit into his head

Like

I dont think he even knew what to do at that point

You ruined his WHOLE SPEECH

THEN FOR SOME REASON YOU GOT MAD AT HIM

gee I wonder why

THEN HIS BROTHERS SHOWED UP

THIS WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE HOW IT WENT AT ALL

PRICK

Recounting this tale now, a few months later, you'd like to think that he was just being the most frfr brother out of everyone

You two had to be torn apart like a pair of summer popsicles

You were kicking and screaming

He was kicking and screaming

Mammon was kicking and screaming, somehow his leg got caught in between you two

It was a warzone

The hallway was destroyed

Multiple bedrooms? Just gone

The brothers?

So

So tired...

None of that fake shit

Deep down you know you would've won though

You still call him bitch boy💕

[trash----panda]

Little bit of gays

(Ft. Kori and Zane)

The frost giant couldnt stop fidgetting, starring at the nearby alley ways, clearly seeing movement from the stray smaller folk, no, that wasnt what he was supposed to be focusing on. The "exterminator" had invited him on a date, why did he even say yes, he only had himself to blame. He'd been caught so off guard he didnt have time to react. He flinched when he saw the dragon hybrid approaching, blushing, the dark green jacket obviously tailored to his body

"you ready?" The dragon offered his hand, gently yanking the frost giant closer, leading him down the street. He was dressed up for sure, the only thing catching Kori off guard was the hat, it smelled familiar. He didnt get a chance to ask about it, instead whisked away into the resteraunt "there you go snow man~" he remained silent as the dragon pushed his seat in, sitting across from him. He hesitated before speaking "why did you-" Zane already knew where this question was going, quickly interupting "you like ice cream right? They have some we could order at the end, and i chose a cruelty free kitchen since you're one of those- ow- i mean... cause you have... dietary preferances" that was weird to say the least.

"well... th-thank you" he glanced atound at the decor, it was loosely based on the italian places humans built. They ordered their food before sitting in silence, Kori drinking his water akwardly. Zane flinched a little, this was starting to get suspicious, everytime he looked like something startled him he suddenly had something to say, a bunch of cheap pick up lines that some how got him to blush. He tried to remain cold, even after they ate. Zane leading them to a park afterwards "wait i wanna show you something!" He got excited, going over towards the water, he'd set up fireworks which he lit with his own breath. That was enough to impress Kori, he didnt even notice the dragon enjoying the wonder on his face. "It's .... Beautiful" he purred softly, finally glancing at the dragon, he was close, close enough to kiss.... he paused, pushing the dragon's face away "what is that?!" There was a shadow on his hat when the fireworks went off "n-nothing, come on we were gonna kiss it was gonna be great" he whined softly, trying to avoid letting the ice giant do it but after being wrestled to the ground his hat was removed. The blonde human just starred up at him, chuckling nervously "there is... an explination" Kori scoffed softly, getting off Zane to walk himself home, ignoring him the whole time he followed. He locked himself insidez his face a deep blue as he kept thinking about how close they were to kissing, flinching when he heard a noise. Was that asshole seriously throwing rocks?.... Nope.... it was the human. He opened the window and grabbed him "what?" He coughed a little, glancing away "he wanted to know when the next date was???" Something about that sheepish smile told Kori that wasnt what he was sent to say, hesitating ad he thought about his awnser.... "5 o'clock, book store at the outskirts, you dont come this time" he tossed him out again, shutting the window.

He threw himself in bed, squealing like a small child, he couldnt wait for 5.

[cosmos-coma]

What do you think witchers will do when reader somehow ✨️falls✨️ into the Witcher universe? I'm just wondering 😂

Oooh, *knuckle crack* here we go. We’re gonna do some bullet points so it’s not too long of a post. Also I’m definitely taking “falling” into literal context. For shits and giggles of course.

Read below the cut!

Geralt

- knowing your luck you probably fall into Geralt while he’s out on a contract.

- He’s out in Skellige, on the outskirts of a coastal town, taking care of a siren nest that got built a little too close. When your dumb ass falls from the sky with a burst of purple energy He hadn’t seen before.

- you fell into the cold ocean water amidst all the fighting, floundering as you were NOT prepared for this. NO SIR, you were reading a book about the Witcher. “Ah, how nice it would be to live in a world like that you whispered.” And GODS BE DAMNED, ONE OF THEM MUST HAVE HEARD YOU.

- after all the threats are taken care of, Geralt helps you further into shore, and wraps you in a spare tunic. His medallion barely hums, left overs from whatever magic must have brought you here. But you seemed human, so no threat there.

- He sounds irritated (as always) but agrees to help you find your way home and help you establish yourself. He swears you’re from Toussiant, based on your... funny clothes for the time period, but no judgement there. You explain to him that you have no home and so he agrees to watch over you for the season, little did he know you would both get too attached to be separated come winter.

Eskel

- With Eskel, you had been feeling rather downtrodden that evening, the world was not going your way and it felt lonely the more you delt with things by yourself. “why couldn’t i have led a simpler life?” you said whistfully, eyes glancing to your Desktop game TW3. “ah, what I wouldn’t give-”

- You didnt have time to finish before you were literally dropped on a broad shouldered man setting up camp in the woods.

- “OOF, FUCK” you yelled, you were definitly gonna have a stiff back tomorrow. and oh... hello... you know this face.

- Eskel is Bewildered because some lady just fell on him in the middle of the woods? but also by your groan of pain he figured you didn’t do this of your own accord. after carefully rolling you off him he tended to any wounds you might have.

- Ever the gentleman, Eskel is, that when you explain that you have nowhere to go he happily offers to let you ride with him until you find a place that you think you’d like to settle down.

- Little did he realize that He was exactly where you’d like to stay. Always.

Lambert

- You appear in the witcher world in what you thought was a dream at first, but the way that the soft moss of the forest floor comes up and slams into your face as you fall into the middle of the woods says other wise. “Fuck that hurt...”

- Lambert, who had been out hunting for dinner around the keep, spied you fall from no where and land with a thud in the moss and pine needles.Quickly riding over on horseback he peers down at you for a bit, making sure you were no threat.

- “What you’re not gonna help a fucking lady up? Rude.” you shunned him and he instantly knew what love was. He led you back to the keep to make sure you were alright and had a place to stay for the coming winter.

- Lambert made sure to bother you all the time then, just so he could hear your snarky remarks back at him. Didn’t stop you from making your own quips and bothering him back though.

- from then on, despite you two relentlessly bothering each other every day, you were inseparable and spent the whole winter together, even heading out on the path together from then on.

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god too much to process I’m about to fucking cry I never cry at tv man THEY LEFT THEM IN AN INN 😭 PETE & LUCIUS GOT MARRIED. WHILE ED LOOKED AT STEDE. the whole crew—well not the whole crew. Izzy oh my god fuck man. They gave him the fucking thesis of the show. Our Flag Does Mean Fucking Death 🏳️‍🌈 our love for eachother and the community we’ve built will both outlive and tear down all of the walls that forced us to the margins

The fucking monkey’s paw got me man I was just thinking today about how my initial season 2 predictions ended with Izzy succumbing to his hubris and bitterness and dying for it I DIDNT KNOW. I DIDNT KNOW HOW HE’D TURN IT AROUND! Ah Fuck 😭 gonna try not to think about him at Calypso’s Birthday. He was so happy and at peace with himself. He finally had a real home and a community. He was a good first mate. He was part of the family. He died apologizing for making Ed feel like he couldn’t be loved and assuring him he was with his hand on his face saying ‘there he is’ but this time it’s Ed not Blackbeard 🥺 Rest In Peace darling Unicorn man I did not expect to end up loving you so much <3

but yeah pushing that gutwrenching tragedy aside for a second (wait nevermind actually because I just realized Izzy got shot in the right side aka the one which according to this show’s logic has all the important bits in it FUCK—) the entire crew is back on The Revenge PLUS Zheng and MOTHERFUCKIN SPANISH JACKIE!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT SPANISH JACKIE REGULAR CREW MEMBER POSSIBILITIES NEXT SEASON????? Fuck me even if our hard work doesn’t pan out (#renew as a crew) and we don’t get our third season I could live with this ending. Ed and Stede are happily retired fixing up an inn, they both know they love eachother, the rest of the crew is off together doing their pirate thing but still able to pop back and visit whenever. Though Ricky when they catch you Ricky you son of a bitch istg. Little weasel. Demeans Jackie, tries to wipe out an entire culture because they didn’t let him play pirate, assumes (of fucking course) that a white man is the real power behind Blackbeard’s glory not Ed’s tactical genius and martial skill. Murders Izzy putting a damper on an otherwise badass scene where everyone looks fucking incredible in their fancy matching coats.

I can’t with Our Flag Means Death man. Despite budget cuts and less episodes they fucking did it again. I know I’ve said it before but I seriously cannot understate how much ofmd means to me. What a season, everything I’d hoped for and more from my favorite show <3

[personalizationai]

It appears rookie is going through the horrors...

Can you tell us more about them ? (Both rookie and the horrors!!)

oh man theres a lot. this is going to be long.

rodrigo “rookie” carvajal has been working with cleanup crew for a good few months now. he started his job at 16, is now 17 (his birthday was february 25th)

basic info on why hes here: rookie got a fake ID from a friends friend to be able to apply for the position of a scavenger. In our little ocverse we imagine the company has a minimum age requirement of around 20. the reason why he would do this at all is because he had become dedicated to the idea of “honoring” his (presumed) dead father lee. he believed that he had no other options left forwards, and that he should have been brave like his dad was.

anyways, ill try and condense the insanity that has been his time at cleanup crew the best i can…

- In his first few days/weeks, rookie was a pretty positive and spunky guy. He was very willing to follow around Dopey, as he’s the defacto leader of the group. Things were… Ok, but that all was shattered by one experience: inspector has a hand in this . Before he appeared physically and revived, he was communicating to dopey. a voice in their head tormenting the scavenger, promising things like a promotion and in general a way out of the cycle. Dopey had killed rookie with a stop sign, profusely apologizing and crying. When questioned about what happened, Dopey lied. Said it was a monster outside.

- After this, rookie became much more closed off from other people, mainly only sticking around lieutenant. all the fear and whatnot built up inside of rookie and he snapped and killed dopey back with a shovel for… revenge. he didnt enjoy it. he tried to explain what had happened, but nobody believed him, and dopey had made it out as if he was just unstable. dopey considered them even now, but an experience like that haunted him for a good long while. hes still scared of stop signs to this day. (not to mention that he was beginning to realize then that he IS dying. and he IS being brought back.)

- then, in comes inspector. from even the first few days of his arrival, he provided rookie support and comfort near constantly. dopey had a bad feeling every time he heard the man speak. rookie on the other hand, was like a moth to a flame. teen who lost his dad + scared and vunerable is insanely easy to manipulate. especially if youre presenting yourself now as someone older and more experienced who cares about you and listens to you ect ect ect.

- inspector would intentionally attempt to hide information from him, such as the sigurd logs note. (he noticed the note was being hidden from him). inspector also would occasionally kind of… try to sew distrust inside of rookie towards the other crew members, and especially fostering the distrust towards dopey further.

- eventually rookie does find the logs and reads them with dopey. they both learn a lot, and while rookie didnt trust dopey a lot then, this among other miscellaneous interactions made his thoughts and feelings towards dopey more complicated. he began to feel guilty for going against inspectors wishes of not “looking in too deeply”. because of this guilt, he confesses to inspector about what they had done. “rookie, what did dopey tell you?”. he promised rookie he wasnt mad, but inside he was SEETHING. its at that point that inspector realized how much of a problem dopey will be.

- dopey began to then realize via observation that rookie is being deeply deeply manipulated by inspector. this started a whole thing where dopey would try to forge more trust from rookie and attempt to get him to realize that hes being taken advantage of. later on, eventually rookie breaks down a bit to inspector alone on the company building (lower level). he admits how scared he is of everything. but most importantly: that he shouldnt be here. that hes only 16. he thought he could handle this all, but its starting to break him. they hug, and rookie hugged tighter than ever. inspector stood there. (dopey was secretly listening.)

- ANYWAYS fast forwarding. end of act 1 was essentially inspector enacting his plan of killing everyone on the crew to try and create so much violence and disorder to attempt and break the cycle through destroying the unity of its events and repetition. this doesnt work. brain managed to kill inspector. inspector is gone for a while.

- rookie attempted to try and be eaten by jeb to escape the cycle. overwhelmed, he only saw his way out of here through death. despite knowing he cant die, thought that maybe just MAYBE this way would work. it didnt, of course. but its more complicated than that.

- floating in the inbetween of life and death, a not very lucid post death rookie was offered a deal by thousands of voices from behind the wall: “do you want to forget?” he accepted.

gonna speed run act 2: FAUX IS HERE! ROOKIE IS STRUGGLING TO COPE WITH THE IDEA THAT INSPECTOR DIDNT CARE FOR HIM AT ALL. act 2 was a little fucking everywhere for many characters doing a lot of things, but whats important for rookie is this:

- rookie then could not remember a single thing that happened to him on cleanup crew. a partial mind wipe. but, anything that had reminded him of it would hurt. both mental and physical. eventually when dopey tried talking to him about everything that had happened, he was quite literally killed suddenly, vanishing. the nature of the deal that was made was that he wasnt supposed to recover these memories, and now that he had, he was killed for it. he comes back but… very jaded. there simply is no way out. none at all. he finds everything simply pointless, its quite the soul crushing feeling

- faux at some point comes onto the scene… rookie and faux were on and off interacting with each other, but eventually he ends up breaking down to faux and mentioning how “do you ever want to talk to somebody again, even if you know it would be bad for you?” this leads into faux revealing to rookie his real identity. rookie, both terrified and curious is a bit in a deer in headlights situation. he ends up asking a few things, such as what happened (he only saw the aftermath of all the death.) and if he really cared about him at all. inspector lies to him both times. he makes rookie promise to not tell anybody, and he doesnt.. but but some people manage to overhear… (dopey again for this, though brain and four were also contributers to OTHER OTHER shit about unamsking faux)

- eventually it all climaxs with a plan made by dopey and specs. dopey had presented this plan vaguely to rookie before faux revealed himself. “if i ask you to take a shot, i need to know if youll do it.” rookie says he cant promise that he will, but he’ll try.

- inspector/faux, now realizing that his cover is going to be blown, now rushes to try and get the gun that dopey and specs obtained first. he got it, but dopey managed to knock it out of his hands with a shovel. holding inspector back, dopey screams for him to take the shot. rookie screams back, babbling about how this wont do anything for anyone. about how they wont even die. about how theyll be right back here tomorrow.

-“for once in your life, trust me rookie!”

- he shoots. both inspector and dopey die at the same time to the same bullet. (this malfunctioned the respawn tech, and those two are now stuck in a sort of purgatory for a good long while. but not dead. they wont be dead just yet.) rookie collapses, defeated.

LOL SEASON 3 crick and deacon are here now!

- he waits for them to come back. he knows they will, but the longer theyre gone the more and more he doubts this belief.

- he becomes closer to four, they finally work through the whole lee connection… he confesses to four that he wishes that he was nicer, that he wasnt stupid. “why do i only think of this shit when its too late?”

- he leans into the people he loves and trusts, liuetenant and four being the main people.

- rookie is much more irratable now. hes trying to thrust himself into a leaderly/strong position in dopeys stead, but unfortunately hes not the best at it. he has almost no patience left for anything, and his only option left right now is to try and be stronger. to be more like dopey, like he told four he wished he was. dopey managed to handle so much, managed to be there for so many people. he wants to be that.

- MOST CURRENT SHIT THOUGH uhhhhh rookies best friend lieutenant told him that hes a robot and then a few moons later got fucking struck by lightning so hard it factory reset the guy into not having and memory in the system of who anyone is. or their friendship. this is upsetting to rookie because lieutenant was planning to tell the others themselves. rookie is deeply upset that this choice of his is now stripped away. nobody here has a lot of choices they can make for themselves, and thats just one less.

- also rookie snapped at crick when they started talking about themselves only having one week left. told crick that theyre trapped here basically. crick didnt believe. “maybe you just didnt try hard enough or looked hard enough to get in contact?” (to leave the job). rookie goes “ITS BEEN MY ONE WEEK FOR MONTHS!” once he calms down from searing hot he mumbles about how crick is “going to have to learn some day”. this mirrors what inspector had said when he first killed EVERYONE. “YOURE ALL GONNA FUCKING LEARN!” this is… intentional

[goatpaste]

bro everytime something with lucy happened i was venting to my groupchat and cursing out araki. what the FUCK dude.

ITS REALLY JUST HORRIBLE

lIKE I CANNOT even beGIN to imagine what fucking PLANET araki was on to write all that fucking shit hole FUCK man

HOW WAS THAT ALLOWED

like, lucy in theory was a very fun and silly cute character, who coulda played a good role! but araki chose violence and decided to make sure Lucy never knew a moments peace between either ALWAYS having grown men preying on her or being made to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders

LIKE it SUCks and its not even important to the plot. literally none of that was important

either!! make lucy an adult?? there was no reason she shoulda been 14 if you wanted to have everyone??? so attracted to her??? just! 25! 24! thats all im asking! would made mountain tim more bearable as a character, the shit with the presidents wife, ect ect

also! just!! TAKE THE RAPE SCENES OUT, THEY LITERALLY DO NOTHING FOR THE PLOT ITS JUST UNSAVORY AND ARAKI IN NO WAY OR FORM HAS THE ABILIT TO WRITE ANY NUANCE TO THAT DEGREE

and if you need to have lucy be 14 SOOO bad??

she didnt need to be married to steel. she just didnt, i dont care about whatever bullshit nonesensical loop hole araki built up for that, its WEIRD. the general concept is bullshit, and on top of it i dONT like seeing scenes were lucy and steel are touchy, or kissing or calling each other pet names. i dont care if its an act. their connection didnt need to be that way. and saying "their relationship was more like she was a mother to steel" WAS ALSO WEIRD. SHE IS 14 WHY IS SHE MOTHER THIS 50 YEAR OLD MAN. LIKE

i would WAY faster accepted a narrative of Steels like, assistant or company partner who helped him dream up this grand race was some starry eye big hearted goof ball of a 14 year old who supported him and they had a goofy grandpa and grandkid/coworker thing going on.

and mountain tim was liKE THAT SHIT SUCKED BECAUSE I REALLY LIKED MOUNTAIN TIM. but literally RIGHT before they kill him they pull that shit and its like?? DUDE?? WHATS YOUR PROBLEM

i woulda given ANYTHING for mountain tim to be like an older brother/father figure to lucy and johnny who cared about them and their safety and lack of positive family roles in their life....

THEN THE SHIT WITH THE PRESIDENTS WIFE IS LIKE EUGHGHH WHY!!! and the BULLSHIT they pulled their to force lucy into that role like

what i woulda GIVEN for like either a swap of HP and Lucy were HP seduces the presidents wife to get close to him and THAT coulda been a bit funny the presidents wife being into HP coulda been comedic. and HP woulda have 100% just killed valentines ass

OR even better, Lucy and HP taking that task on together, infiltrating's Valentines house together. HP and Lucy sibling moments.. HP connecting to Lucy and seeing her younger brother in Lucy and tying into her character...

THEN THE WHOLE THING WITH VALENTINE IS SO HORRENDOUS ITS JUST UPSETTING

Valentines character ranges from straight up horrible to just boring. Like he coulda been a fun crazy US president they kill. but hes just, gross and boring. Taking D4C away from him. doesn't deserve such a swag stand

THEN THE SHIT AT THE FUCKING STUPID ASS LAST CHAPTERS WITH ALT DIEGO

like i went from excited for even a semblance for extra diego content to really not fuckin caring. Alt Diego literally was just boring and i dont care about the world like i did Scary Monsters. and he carried none of base world diegos charm.. THE N THEY PULL ONE LAST NASTY SCENE BETWEEN HIM AND LUCY ON THE WAY OUT. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ARAKI MY FUCKING GOD MAN

[sheikah-simp]

Exile//Vilify, One Year Retrospective

Well folks, as of May 31st, 2023, it has officially been one whole year since the last update for Exile//Vilify was released, and it simultaneously feels like way longer than that and not very long at all. But, in celebration, I wanted to take some time to look back on my thoughts and ideas and processes that led up to the creation of this story, and share some appreciation for all that’s happened since then.

First of all, this book is massive, and it was way more massive than I thought it would be when I set off to write it. It is almost as long as Tolkein’s “Two Towers” and other similar novels—not what I was expecting when I went in to write an origin story about a character completely lacking in personality with no backstory. But if there is one thing I do, and do well, it is commit to the bit. And here, the bit was doing justice to a character I saw having so much potential but was, quite literally, doomed by the narrative, and built to be a throwaway character for a spinoff game consumed by his own hubris and never developed or mentioned again. And I thought to myself, “Man, that sucks! What would it be like to be him?” And the answer is: it would suck a lot, actually. But also in that vein, I still wanted to portray how his life was still a life worth living, and his story, one that was worth telling. Even if it is one that doesn’t “matter” to Nintendo or the LOZ franchise as a whole, even if it’s one I had to entirely make up grasping for straws, it is one that mattered to us. And that’s kind of the thesis of the entire book.

Many of you know I’m a Pokemon writer (hence username) and I never really intended to write in other fandoms, but I dont know what I expected. Something about this character just fucking gripped me, and I couldnt let myself stop until his story was out of me. But the thing is, I wasn’t super interactive within the Pokemon fandom. I had actually just ended a huge general life hiatus for mental health and had made a resolution to get back to what I love. The result of that was the completion of The Devil and the Dead Sea and the start of my hardenshipping series. But I just kind of dropped that book on AO3 when it was complete and then didnt interact with anyone. I wrote it and then uploaded it all at once, which didnt give me a lot of time or opportunity to develop a community and discuss updates. I had a few people who reached out, but nothing close to the type of community I’ve felt now.

I have been so full of love and blown away by the support I’ve received from this small but mighty niche in the community. So first of all, I just want to say thank you. I'm so glad that I could bring this story to life and so blessed to think of how many people it's touched. So now I just want to take a moment and look back on the book and how it started, what things changed, and where it's going and what's happening in the future.

Exile//Vilify's conception

Does it feel like a trial? Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?

The band, The National, has inspired I think all of my fics to this point. After playing Age of Calamity, Astor had been swimming around so much in my head, especially since so much of his mysteries were unanswered. And one day blorbo was on my brain in just the correct way at just the correct time when I happened to be listening to a completely unrelated song from Portal 2, Exile Vilify. The book, of course, has nothing to do with Portal, but on that particular day, the lyrics really spoke to me of Astor and his potential struggles, and I became fascinated with the idea of him and his ideological square-off against the king: a man who was so set on defying prophecy and the man who, well, prophesied it.

So Exile//Vilify was born, to me, actually in the concept of a butting of heads between King Rhoam and Astor. I saw the song lyrics as a dialogue between the two of them, mutual antagonistic (but also troubled) feelings shared between them. So King Rhoam was actually going to have a much bigger role in my original vision for Exile//Vilify. In fact there was a toss up in my mind between whether or not he'd have an odd homoerotic rivalry thing for the king, or his crush on the queen, but--

But the simple fact of the matter is I found Rhoam super unlikeable and sadly couldn't find a good way to get into his head in a way that would be sustainable for a novel. So while the concept is what initially gripped me, Exile//Vilify ended up going in a different direction, although the inception of that concept is definitely still there. The closest I've gotten to writing my desired dynamic between Astor and the King was in "Prophecies to Waterfowl," a one-shot in my short stories compilation Stories from Exile. ("Prophecies to Waterfowl," aside from "Voe and You," is my favorite of my stories in that compilation).

Other things that were cut/changed in the writing process

When I realized the fic was getting as massive as it was, I wanted to streamline its focus and decided to cut down on some plotlines. I could have just left it was it was, because fic writing is about being self-indulgent, but I want to challenge myself to be a better writer than that. (Not that there is anything wrong with just writing to be self-indulgent, but I use my fics as my place to practice and get better, so I need to.. actually practice).

One of the biggest things that was therefore cut was the relationship between Astor and Ganondorf, and the implications of Astor's past lives. How Astor became the one selected by Ganondorf. Because in the fic, it just ended up seeming random, which was intentional. Fate is merciless and random and does not pick and choose, while also picking and choosing.

There were going to be more Astor and Ganon dream scenes planned, and a plotline of Astor's "awakening" somewhere along the line where he unlocked visions of his past as a different kind of royal seer--the seer to Ganondorf. There are hints of this in the dreams, but nothing concrete.

Still, the idea of what "could be" still fascinates me, and I love the idea of exploring the idea of Astor as Ganondorf's reincarnated seer, and I have a one shot that I am currently working on that explores this very concept, and can be considered canon (or semi-canon) to Exile//Vilify. I hope to have that out... soon. Ish. Eventually. I have a lot cooking right now.

Other honorable mentions:

Astor was going to have more blatant romantic feelings for Rose.

Astor was going to have more blatant romantic (or complicated) feelings for Rhoam.

The contention between Ganondorf trying to push Astor into evil and Thelem agreeing to block Ganon from Astor in the meantime was also going to be explored more, but Ganondorf got his last laugh on that eventually.

Even more fucking Order of the Seers stuff (culture, rituals, etc)

Chapters of Astor stalking Link and Zelda leading up to the awakening of the Calamity

More Yiga scenes (my little teen Kohga gives me oxygen) and Astor building a cult following of people who worship Ganon

Astor having basically a weird prophetical drug addiction to the "high" of witnessing the Great Calamity in his visions (this is kind of implied in the book, but not expanded on)

All of these things, ultimately, were great ideas, and things I'd love to explore and maybe will some day if I'm ever inspired enough on any of them to write anything concrete. They were just things that slightly detracted from the story I wanted to tell. But that's why I keep Stories from Exile around.

So What's Next?

As I mentioned, I have a few things Exile//Vilify related still in the works. The first is that Astor/Ganondorf one shot I was talking about. (Likely going to be called "Prophet to a Gerudo King.") I also have a secret surprise fic commission that is also Astor/Ganondorf related and involves an AU and the Stories from Exile universe ;) (that one will hopefully be out soon).

I have a lot of things on my Stories from Exile list that were not out yet, and I may revisit them if I'm feeling or have the time. I'd love to keep updating that one every now and again, now that Exile//Vilify is complete, just to keep the world alive.

I also am planning on doing a limited, hard-cover release of Exile//Vilify to celebrate its publication. I have a great team of people who have been slowly helping me copyedit this massive beast so I can get it printed from a self-publishing company. It will not be publicly listed for sale, as it is illegal for me to sell or make money off of it. This hardcover will only be available to obtain for those who contact me on tumblr during a specific time frame. That time frame is not now. When I have a more clear set date for that, I will circulate posts. You will have to cover the cost of shipping and maybe some of the printing depending on what the cost is on my end, but the book will be free. It will likely be 500+ pages. It will likely happen by the end of the year.

That said, as the book nears being printed, if you would like to lend a hand proofreading, there is still time!! Please just DM me. You will have the option to be credited in the hardcover if you'd like.

And finally, you'll still be able to find me here, and updating in my other writing. I still really love receiving asks about this book, so please never be a stranger to my inbox. Sometimes I have more energy and power to reply than others, but every ask always makes my day.

I have planned "Trouble Will Find Me," which is a Thelem and Azelphir prequel that will detail some of the stuff that I didn't have time to develop about the Order of the Seers, and Thelem's origin story. This one I might just release all in one chunk - uncertain right now. At that point though... isn't that kind of just original fiction.... set in the BOTW world???? Unsure.

I'll also be returning to my Pokemon series, The Dead Sea Trilogy, if you have any interest in that fandom or my other writing.

That's all I have for you! Thank you all so much for an amazing year (really more than that, since I've been posting about this big honkin' thing since December 2020...) and thank you so much for being such a great community. I can't wait to see where else this journey leads.

[scp-ao3-author]

Hi! Do you have any stories about the origin of something you wrote?

OH OH OH OH OKAY

SO UHHH LETS JUST DO THEM ALL

Lightning:

Lightning was my first attempt at a 100k fic. its currently on anonymous because I have a firm belief that A Certain Author is reading my work and that is very scary. There was an actual draft that made it TO 100k, but the plot sucked?

Like I detailed every moment of Y/N from birth to SCP Foundation because I was a very "Grrr... Accuracy" guy. and then I had an entire subplot between y/n and kondraki, which inevitably fails. there was a whole thing of Y/n's brain being fried from amnestics and someone was like "this is actually stupid :/" so i ended up rewriting it with whatever I pulled from my ass.

Confession booth:

Confession booth was supposed to be a crack fic. surprise surprise. my (ex) friend wanted me to write a crack fic of clef in a priest outfit. but he didnt seem... like the kind of guy to just do that for no reason? at least back then I figured him to be like that guy. since then, I have grown to learn more about clef so in hindsight, I would like to rewrite some of my older stories to be more fitting. But I made a plot to rationalize Priest Clef and well. thats what was created.

Hold The Line:

I was maladaptive Daydreaming to Give and Take by Poor Mans Poison and i thought I was going to die if i didnt share the thoughts in my head.

The Only World You Know:

I got tired of Iceberg being shitty and pathetic with no backstory. Had to flesh that sad little milkshake

Take the seeds:

Fin.

Memory:

I always had the headcanon that Francis had legitimately worked in the Foundation as a system well before taking control as Dr. Clef. But one of the questions that always begged in my head was like... How would he have reacted with the other staff? I experimented with Kondraki, who also went through his original change. The idea of Kondraki being part of the Montauk Procedure and spiraling actually came from Author Kondraki's old blog. the rest I pulled out my ass with the help of a few friends. The original story was supposed to be "They hate each other, but begrudgingly are forced to get along. thats it." but people were ADAMANT about making them fall in love. it was mildly uncomfortable but i rolled with it and i will admit. I kind of like how it turned out apart from the last chapter.

Its Like Dying:

I wanted to write a followup to Memory about how Francis affected Kondraki's life in such a way that when Kondraki finally realized he cared, it had been too late to actually follow through on that. He takes this out towards Clef, the man who suddenly appeared after Francis Dissapeared, but eventually learns to accept when something is gone forever, and hopefully when i get around to it again, he will move towards actually accpeting clef into his life, not knowing that hes the only other person who will treat him like hes not insane for knowing Francis Existed.

I Am Ready To See You Again:

its supposed to be like a ressurection idea not FOR resurrection but similar. they wake up, everything is new and strange. and different. but as they explore the memory of their previous lifetime goes away, and they have to adjust to their own world. It centers mainly around A Major what with their multi universal knowledge? the idea was SUPPOSED to be that at least. I got the intro out and.... I lost all my notes apart from "Gears finds 173"

They Dont Even Have Dental:

This was supposed to be a silly joke seminar about Clef hating the GOC for not having dental, a running gag between some of my friend groups. its like an unspoken agreement. that place sucks, they dont have dental. and then i planted a cute little bit of plot at the end for an... upcoming show im working on. dw. ill share the script.

when its done.

Francis Disturbed:

OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING.

HHHH OKAY SO.

this was built off of a million headcanons swirling in my little head, but the final headcanon that broke the google doc was this:

Francis was a premature baby.

lemme break this one down im a bit excited lol

in 4231, Francis loved lily. alot. and it hurt him because she hurt him, but he stayed nonetheless. that, plus having DID? probably meant that it was VERY unlikely he had a stable family life growing up. dads out of the picture, type greenery adapted at a young age... you know? it adds up. then there was the stuff about agora. I thought...

I honestly thought that Agora was laying the self-shaming and "I should have killed my son" stuff a bit... i hated it. Like it was good but it rubbed me the wrong way a little and after a moment im like... "What if... i worked with that idea?" and created a story about Francis' childhood dynamic. this is where it gets fun:

Ive been planning the next chapter for a little while now, but this all happened during a time period in which I did not EXIST, so i have to go around my writing carefully. the next chapter is going to be the after effects of what... Agora... Did... and after THAT we get to see Francis entering the GOC, and what happened to him in the Ichabod Campaign.

it gets a little funny there was going to be a bit where ukulele gets a balloon tied to his arm so his team can find him off-missions.

Now. this wont make sense, until you SEE the chapter but... I cant continue writing the story until I get a physical copy of IT by stephen king....

and i dont live near a library or book shop OR thrift store that has it.

And I hate amazon.

A Different Shade OF Green:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH OH GOD

HHHHH lemme grab my notes uhhhh ADSOG has been planned for a WHILE

ACTUALLY HERES THE DRAFT

FAIR WARNING: TREAT this story like it is NOT the actual bones of ADSOG on AO3. I kind of just kept rambling, I wanted an arc for a story where Blackbird takes an interest into Francis, but it ultimately doesn't work out, ukulele appears more. Adam is a dick. Ten is more active in the story too. there's SO many differences between this and the actual story. AND the format is FUCKED

ADSOG was supposed to be a single one shot, where seven confronted clef about his issues. She responds to his dickish behavior by shoving a spoon into his face, and he replies by biting into it and slowly chewing it while they make eye contact. that was ALL the story was supposed to be. then i was like "I like the barber scene." that is actually a one shot on its own that i just blended into the draft and main story. there are SO gonna be more scenes in the main story where francis is stimmming. at some point or another though i had at one point built SO many one shot stories on them that i just said fuck it and made it all one big story and

oh my god.

you are going to cry at the ending.

Orangechild:

uhh this was actually a full narrative but then i hit up @tickedtimebomb and was like "give me a line that fucks and ill turn it into a poem" and that's how I got "and then i fed the world my soul" WHICH IS ALSO REFRENCED IN THE DRAFT OF ADSOG

idk if anyone's noticed or not but i have a million little red strings tying all of my story together. :D

Coworker activites:

I just like john's work.

stop dicking around mann:

every kondraki ship has its bottle dick chapter.

intervention:

fin

eye for an eye:

Eye for an eye was created with the ongoing concept of "4231-a comes back, how will clef react?" but instead of the "he would cry and die" I decided to go for a "He's going to be pissed."

taphestry:

I REALLY LIKE JOHNS WORK

it is a vacation:

I had a silly idea of the doctors being sent to antarctica and i played with it a little with mattastr0phic because I wanted myriad in the story. I had another friend who helped me with the iceberg bit too. <3

in cod we trust:

I just wanted to give Cimmerian some shit.

apples and oranges:

I take commissions for writing. I was paid to make this, that doesn't mean I don't love it though i have EVERY chapter preplanned. as of right now, unfortunately, I am on pause for my writing because I burned myself a little bit on regular writing and am just sticking to script writing for some *cough* shows.

Ketchup and Mustard:

I am preparing for something called a "Kingson bomb" which is: whenever i have an extra amount of money laying around, I grab some artists and nab them to make Kingson commissions, thus making a small vault of Kingson art. when I reach an unholy large amount, I'm going to blast @finiffy with it and fucking kill them. one of the people I commissioned said something along the lines of "They are so ketchup and mustard to me" and well. I had to do it.

Bear your tombstone:

The idea for this story was actually the fact that it was supposed to be its own chapter in Francis disturbed, but i got WAY to excited making it to the point I just uploaded it on its own.

Seventeen minutes:

i wanted to autism code kondraki and have others see my vision.

Something New:

I want a story similar to Memory, I am specifically making this in honor of Amones, who has absolutely INCREDIBLE art!!!!!

THEY ARE ALSO MAKING A REALLY COOL VIDEO GAME AKFSJDKLF

tales of a greyhound stranger:

THIS story was inspired by 4231 and personal experience, but not in a sad way. 4231 briefly mentions that Francis rides on the Greyhound, a bus station that's prominent in Europe and America. I also ride greyhound (and will be going partially across country in about a month) and sometimes when you use the bus system, you come across some... REALLY interesting people. I think Francis had a beautiful time traveling and ended up having fun once in a while with others. I think he deserves nice things.

[cathalbravecog]

Man... I can't stop thinking about the things that were talked about on the stream, especially the answer on my question - so... get ready for a ramble! its a long one. oops. i dont even know where im going with this, im just dumping my thoughts somewhere. half is about ttcc lore in general and the streams, the other half is about cathal and me projecting onto him deeper.

before i even hop deeper into this, it wasn't until early today that i learned that there was a whole drama about cranky's answers (regarding the graham and flint question and the whole "keep it sane" thing. i thought it was...off, but i understood it as 'do what you want people, just don't start any harassment because of ships and your favorite pairs'.

definitely could have been phrased better, though. at least we got a good response and an apology later from maven on twitter. but i legit did not know this was a drama until those twitter posts were made LOL. i dont interact with the fandom so i do not know how that answer was percieved by most. or if anyone except for me and my friends have had any thoughts about the question i asked that got answered.)

and what im tryna get to is that i get cranky isnt the one to be answering lore things, and probably didnt know what to answer... but it's still something to think about

because being told "cogs and toons just dont become how they are out of the blue" (paraphrasing here) as an answer to what cathal initially thought of seeing his dad be bet up and thrown off a tower is... confusing? he did say first and foremost that it has to be built upon before saying that. i understand that this is... a lot of characters! and cathal did have some focus on him thanks to the comic and they wanted to focus on other managers... but some have deeper, more intricate lore that's easy to grasp (especially the more, well, angstier managers like chip and misty.)

and we have gotten some extra lore for other managers like belle, mary, tawny.... thanks to thomas' rambles.

and it's definitely difficult for a team of volounteers working hard on a fan game together to make lore for all the characters, that are still very young in their *life span*, having been around for less than a year. despite ttcc being more character driven and focused on the cogs, it's still a game they have to run so they cannot focus on lore only and some game management has to be done first. there's a bunch of things they have to consider, like consistency and how fans may react, or possible themes or what they want the story to be...

and. yeah. its hard since. come on lets admit it. clash has an issue with how these are all given to us. hell, there's lore bits i still dont know about and im still learning because it's..so all over the place. a new player will not know about it. maven acknowledged this in the tweet and i really appreciate that, as it's honestly been my number one issue with clash, especially as someone who is there for the lore. (i mean, and the gameplay, i know some people who don't play the game itself much. well i sure do a little TOO MUCH because i have PROBLEMS. but im interested in the lore, too, yknow?)

some lore you cant learn from the wiki, and unless you interact with the community, you may never learn *where* all of this even is. if you werent live for certain lore there, it's hardly accessible to you. lore locked behind one time events, an arg website, wikis, discord chats... all that. it's hard to keep track of! i'm sure it's like that for both the fans and the writers. these characters are great, fun, and i love them, but the way we are given this information is... not the best. it's very easy to miss certain details.

it's especially bad if you're like me - only ever interacting with a close group of people you trust, (because people are scary especially a lot of... lore driven fans. yeahnoimeanshippers.sorry.and just big crowds of people in general) having only gotten back into the game recently AFTER most of the major lore events (first played once in 2019, then never again until january 2023) and also you dislike youtube and video content, so you dont watch it. something in your brain would rather if you step on a nail than watch a playthrough video (especially with commentary).

like in general it shouldnt be necessary to go through all these hoops just to know the lore! especially for things that may have little lore...

anyways, uh, back to cathal. i cannot stop thinking about this.

it definitely wasnt an answer to what i specifically asked - but possibly more so about... why cathal is the way he is? and despite what my brain and low self esteem during hard times may tell me - i do not believe that anybody is truly "lazy". i just dont think that exists. there's always some reason behind a person being unmotivated or lazy. even the little things!

but like... that's just kinda obvious. all toons and cogs have motivations. thats like... one of the basics of writing characters. have motivations for characters and reasons for why they are how they are. doesnt have to be anything tragic, just.... how they are as people.

it's totally unrelated to the question of what cathal thought about seeing his dad like that... but oh well! i asked that because i made up my own story around that already, and i just wanted to see what someone working on the game thinks about the same idea.

not to be Tumblr User CathalBravecog, but, of course I have projected heavily onto cathal. i have already stated how important cathal is to me as a character, especially with appreciating myself when im.. not exactly the most motivated. when im not doing much. taught me to appreciate breaks. hell! i keep preaching this myself. its okay to take breaks! and yet i often end up not doing it and i overwork myself on games and art and other things.

there's... a lot of things "wrong" with me that i don't have names for yet, especially due to not having a diagnosis for them, but they're very real feelings and they cause me to be unable to do things a lot of the time. various mental blocks and a new member of the gang... physical pai! hooray.

this... endless productivity we are forced and expected to do. it can take a toll on you. breaks are just as necessary and to say it's a thing that has to be re-learned is... sickening. hooray for living in a Corporate (clash) society, fellas.

one thing i can say is that i absolutely headcanon that cathal has adhd - though, maybe not the same type i do. i do not think he gets randomly hyper and wants to (and does) jump around everywhere and blurt things out randomly and impulsively. cathal here has the low energy, yknow.

i like that a lot of the content around him doesnt even describe him with the words "lazy" and "sleepy" instead.

every day is the same... even if his job is relatively simple, just watching over the camera feed - it's definitely boring... and having to do it every day is not rewarding. and being mostly alone and without consequence, he gives into wanting to do something else. he's got these huge screens and a room to himself, and he loves watching shows and cartoons... so he's gonna do that. it's more fun. it's stimulating. and especially with his dad being the one to give him his position, he knows that he's got nothing to really worry about there.

i also think it's a bit hard to be motivated knowing that... this war between the cogs and toons is just. endless. hell, again, he has to see his dad *everyday* be attacked by them. his body damaged after the fall - only to be fixed again. rinse and repeat. i would too, find it pointless. especially if you're like cathal, since i pointed out before that he is very kind and caring towards the other cogs. he's also thoughtful, noting that yknow... a lot of stairs to get to his room.

why do all that when you can chill... and feel good. do something that feels nice...

i don't have any names for this, but with how sleepy he usually is, that's definitely a thing to consider too. and just, from experience... being tired and/or sleepy it... dismotivates you even more. its so hard to start tasks even if you *want* to do them. and considering cathal mooost likely doesn't want to do his work on his own - then these tasks can be just. impossible to start.

like, i have struggled with this my entire life myself, just because of my adhd screwing with everything, but after getting covid and most definitely getting a form of chronic exhaustion from it.. things have been even harder. i pull myself through day and i barely have the energy to even start anything. sometimes i dont even do anything all day and... woops! still no mood or energy to do anything. i just work on random bursts of motivation and things that captivate me...

not sure how it relates to cathal, but, hey, if im personal here ill ramble about it too because WOW it has been biting me in the ass and i need to speak to Professionals About It

like... i dont think hes being "lazy" willingly, yknow? theres a reason behind it. it definitely is just... being sleepy, the comfort... the fun and stimulation doing something fun he's interested in (his shows) are just... stronger desires and way easier for him to get to. why struggle through something when it takes up all your energy, and then you feel no reward for it? yeah. exactly. even just "not feeling like it" is a reson. "not having energy" is a reason. hey, are these things to get better about if needed? certainly. i wish i could get help with this, it would help me in my life so so much. but should it be seen as ENTIRELY negative and as being a "hinder to society". hell nah. and i think thats swag. cathal is swag he can do this, good for him lmaooo. my brain is deteriorating i apologize.

there was... another thing i wanted to say, but i forgot. so i'll move on.

but just... yeah. i dont think cathal is just lazy. i dont believe in "laziness". he's got reasons for why he prefers naps and just... watching tv instead of doing his work. perhaps he does want to do these things, but gave up on trying. its not worth the effort, it does not feel good. its not stimulating enough to keep him going.

[tezzbot]

I want to know.. ... ur karamatsu thots

i love karamatsu a lot and i think it is a shame like. how hes been treated by fans over the years but also that people genuinely think hes cool

hes just like the rest of them hes literally just some guy hes so dude and like hes trying he tries so hard but hes just so very lame and pathetic and thats so funny to me

hes so like. interesting to think about because like. i feel like we as the audience still even after 3 seasons and a movie (hasnt seen hippopo or whatever movie yet) we still dont know much about karamatsu at least as much as we do the other 5. like the movie was ostensibly About him it was his memory world it was his regret he was pretty much the main character, but we barely saw him he barely grew as a character which i get is the point of a comedy show and its honestly impressive getting through an entire movie while moving absolutely nothing lol like we have no idea how karamatsu evolved from just a little guy to. That. (iguesscomingoutchangesamanlol)

they even mention it in pizza, they never have any idea what karamatsu is thinking and neither do we!! his genuine feelings are SO under lock and key most of the time so its really hard to get a gauge on him he grew up and built up cringe as fuck walls that have Lasted that he only lets down when he sees fit

that is one area he has grown though he is bringing it down more frequently n i really enjoy it like he lets it down a lot more through the seasons especially around choromatsu (suiriku underrated) like he tells him doing everything for everyone is hell he tells him about his crush and how hes worried about how todomatsus gonna be. and hes letting out his more negative feelings through it like how Low his tolerance for his brothers has gotten, on my rewatch of the show hes absolutely just stopped giving a fuck and its one of my favourite things he will just flat out be like i dont care, exclusivematsu is the best possible direction they couldve gone with him, his whole part in pizza where we Watch that wall come down, the bits in phantom stream where hes like jyushimatsu i do not see you. choromatsu i believe in you!! >;D and then he walks out the room like :| NBMVNC literally any time he interacts with osomatsu absolutely No respect

i feel like most of his popularity, at least in the early days idk i dont really interact w wider fandom now, came from him being a sad little wet dog of a man that was prime woobification real estate but i just really like when he gets mean cus he gets so backhanded about it too like hes soooo bitchy its so funny LIKE IN THE BARTENDER SKIT theyre like dude we didnt order these give us our drinks and he fucking tuts and says like okay fine in The most fruity way hes ever done anything and thats saying something hes literally so fucking funny

i do also enjoy that he was the only one able to make friends in s2 he was absolutely that biker gangs little purse dog they kept him around for laughs, the way hes so useless he physically cannot get a job.. lame little creature with gunk in his eyes

anyway yeah im not good at tying my ramblinig posts up in a neat little bow and i feel like i do have more to say like this isnt all my feelings on karama but i cant. think of anything else so I'll leave it at, all i know is if i was able to break through his first defensive layer of coolguy nonsense i absolutely would be his friend he is so fucking funny to me <3 mean bestie hours im holding him like this

[pitynostars]

this is baseless speculation as ive done the bare minimum deep thinking on potd but you mentioned the master’s bitterness because of ttc when talking about the forced regen and that has me thinking a little bit like. i haven’t made real sense of what happened but maybe him becoming her stems directly from that bitterness and the knowledge that there is a piece of the doctor in every time lord. if the master is the doctor then he’s the special one, not her. in s12 he says something like ‘you went around acting like you were special and now i know you really are’ and so mayhaps the forced regen can maybe be seen as him wanting to level the playing field? take her down from the pedestal he’s put her on bc of ttc or allow him to get up there too. the doctor made the time lords but now the master is the doctor and he’s making his own bigger army of special cybermen (? is that what he was doing? i maybe didnt pay enough attention) it’s the whole ‘we’re not so different, you and i’ thing. he’s just trying to make them equals again and it’s such a big deal for him that if he has to kill her to achieve his goals then so be it. maybe. they still coulda fleshed it out a bit more (that’s an understatement)

unrelated but man it’s so frustrating to have to come up with all these what ifs for intention like if it had been written well then we’d know! it feels like an attempt at making up for how much things were spelled out in s11 like a 180° turn from infodumping to not even having the time or care to rationalize the stuff that happens. it’s hilarious that ive seen so much more speculation about the things that happened and were supposedly resolved IN the episode than about the (literal) cliffhanger. good riddance.

him becoming her stems directly from that bitterness and the knowledge that there is a piece of the doctor in every time lord. if the master is the doctor then he’s the special one, not her.

yeah thats how i'm reading it atm. there's also this deep self hatred w Dhawan master so i think part of it is supposed to be that too, especially with the emphasis of the "i erased you doctor. don't let me go back to being me" line as it's being reversed (+ dhawan emphasised this self hatred in his interviews)

"it feels like an attempt at making up for how much things were spelled out in s11 like a 180° turn from infodumping to not even having the time or care to rationalize the stuff that happens."

this has been on my mind a lot actually. i dont think it HAS been a 180 but i think its symptoms of the eps/place in the era.

we still get mountains and mountains of unnecessary exposition, but it's all about just. what's happening in the plot. we dont get much insight into whats motivating the characters (or if we do, it's heavy handed exposition like dan's "oh i almost died so i want to leave" which is simple and understandable) but say 13, the master, yaz i'm left just like.... why'd any of them do any of that??? unless you sit there compiling notes about one off lines the characters had in the past + what the cast and crew have said they were TRYING to do.

compared to s11 i think it's just become more noticable because back in the beginning they were still building the characters (lol) + there was less going on plot wise for them to react to in ways that felt in or out of character. but at this point the END of the era we should KNOW these characters well enough to understand why they're doing xyz. but say like, yaz's reason for leaving the tardis is so difficult to understand because it just sort of. happens. i think a lot of that can be built on the back of weak characterisation before, but as i've argued already in the case of yaz i feel her exit goes completely AGAINST her defining characteristics and "Doctorification" arc as i understand them.

i feel the same with 13. her defining character has always been about her being "socially awkward" and closed off, an arc which like. in any other situation the logical satisfying growth and resolution is "the doctor opens up to her friends". but no instead it's like. don't bother making an effort actually. it's fine to be an ass and just pass it off half heartedly as social awkwardness.

they all jsut feel so static and one note, but equally this characterisation is sometimes just ignored when its convenient for the plot or another piece of characterisation (e.g., i'd say one of yaz's defining characteristics in the beginning is she's quite stubborn... but not really to the doctor, because she's been so beaten down after being snapped at/told off every time she dares ask the doctor something (which then i guess is supposed to tie into her... loving the dr ???))

again like the logical conclusion to yaz's arc mirrors something like Clara or Martha's. either she needs to realise the Doctor not returning her feelings (or, if you think she DOES return them like, at least not being willing to act on them) hurts too much and leaves for her own adventures, or they have a tragic thing where yaz strives too hard to show herself like. worthy or whatever and crashes and burns. instead she just... sort of walks off? for no apparent reason??

of course, that's not to say that those arcs HAD to finish in those ways, but DO SOMETHING with them. why bring them up as character flaws/traits if they're not going to go on a journey alongside the plot and character??? everyone just feels so static. i could watch TWWFTE and TPOTD back to back and i'd be like "oh that Doctor had a short run"

off from character, but i also think the "over exposition" in s11 vs say flux and that in s11 the plots were simpler, and so the exposition was just repeating things you already knew/had seen so it was like beating a dead horse with The Point, whereas in this and flux, there's so much going on that it's like a new point every second. "paintings are stolen. the master is rasputin. oh cyberman planet. oh there's daleks in volcanoes. the master is doing something funky with regeneration and the doctor. ... wait the doctor is regenerating.... now they're dhawan?? ... wait no but it's just the master. but then why does the tardis let him in ?? so it's the doctor?? then why are they acting like that it must be they've merged. why is tegan climbing down a shaft. oh they solve it by... making all volcanoes on earth metal now??? that seems a very very bad idea. that kid from the beginning i forgot about, the master can apparently control it and kills the doctor w it." it's just wham wham wham new point about something completely different that if you're just trying to watch it you blink and miss like 3 different plot points. (or maybe thats my undiagnosed potential adhd unable to keep up lmao)

it’s hilarious that ive seen so much more speculation about the things that happened and were supposedly resolved IN the episode than about the (literal) cliffhanger.

LMAO literally i've spent (checks calendar) 3 days just trying to make sense of the plot and character choices chibnall era has been EXHAUSTING

[fuck-off-im-ace]

Hey really like reading your thoughts on WN :)

Im sorry to intrude but I’m wondering how did you watch season2? Did you watch it without knowing anything or you got spoilers from tumblr about the kiss? I really tried my best to stay off tumblr for 2-3 days lol and it’s freaking hard!!!

The team were really hyping it up on their social media about the ‘will they won’t they’ with so much hints for the canon avatrice!! but i was really not expected to see the kiss in e8!!! We learned to have low expectations so that we don’t disappoint. But man oh man I was so happy already in ep5 with that moment of Ava’s near/ death and they share that eye-gaze like in s1 my heart melted. Then the kiss came my heart exploded!!! Everything leading up to that scene was so beautiful!

I wish that this show is something that got ordered for 4-5 seasons in advance so the writers get more room to give us more slow burn. But let’s hope for renewal of season3.

I wish that Mary would have come back (sister Dora entrance wouldve been perfectly if it was Mary!!! I was watching it on my small screen phone so I couldn’t see clearly at first if it was Mary I was happy for a few seconds :( only to be disappointed when she said she’s sister Dora). And they kinda did dirty on Lilith. Make it a complete waste of her redemption at the end of s1!!!

Anyways thanks for reading sorry again

Hi @justanotheruntitled04!

First off, you're not intruding at all, always very happy to talk about warrior nun with people!!

I watched the show completly spoiler free! I blocked all the tags i could think of (it was a big ass list) just to be sure, and watched it on thursday during the afternoon, so not a lot of people had the time to watch and post about it. Feeling very lucky for that one, i was glad to be spoiler free!

And i have no idea why, but i knew they were gonna kiss. They built it enough in social media, and i have watched and read a bit of interview of the crew, they know what they're doing. They didnt come to mess around with queer people. They wanted to do good. So when they started hyping up Avatrice, and Kristina talked about knowing which episode would be the fan favorite, i knew we were getting a kiss. But i think that just made the watch even more interesting, cause for the whole show i was just waiting for it to happen!! When they're dancing in the bar, when they're talking in their appartement, when they were just staring at each other tenderly, i was Screaming at my screen for them to kiss.

And same, i think the show is well made for a 3 seasons arc, so i hope we do get another one. They set it up real well with that "there is a divine war coming", and i hope we get to see that!

I know what you mean for Mary, she was one of my favorite characters. I don't know what happened, know she wasnt in s2 for personnal reason so they had to work around what they already had. One thing i love is that we had no body, and no real confirmation of it? Vincent said it to Lilith, but if she wanted to come back for a third season, it would be super easy to write her in! Maybe she was in hiding, maybe Adriel kept her prisonner, maybe some random person found her and for all of s2 she was slowly healing, for real it would be super easy to just figure out something, so i am keeping hope for that, even tho i probably shouldnt.

As for the Lilith storyline, i have so many thoughts. I am currently working on a post, cause there is A Lot to unpack (and by working on it i mean i have been thinking about making one) and i, personnally, really like where they are taking her. I was disapointed at first, cause i love a (morally) good demon, but i think i know what they wanna do with her and yeah anyway i have thoughts that i will eventually share, maybe, if i get around to actually do it and people have an interest in that.

And no need to apologise for writing! I would keep my ask closed if i had a problem with it, i think its a real fun way to bounce thoughts off each other and developp a thought process and a fandom! So yeah, thanks for the ask!

[anakinskywalkerog]

omgieeees ive been waiting and checking tumblr at literally regular intervals waiting to hear back from you <3

i feel like youre starting to get a bit sick of him... 😂 if the definition of crush is wanting to kiss sumun, i wouldnt say i was crushing on him, i just kind of liked him? it was really weird, this whole thing made no sense from the start, sis.

NO i disagree, it would be super weird to date sumun who looks like you, that feels like something straight out of narcissism. i could never, but im also indian and ive never liked any indian guys (i dont live in india to be fair tho) although maybe there's something slightly resembling me in the guys ive liked if we look too hard? idk. idts tho.

she has pretty eyes! she has his eyes, but they're different somehow. more detailed? LMAO i just really love eyes in general; i could recognize all of my friends from their eyes rather than their face 💀

yeahhh i dont like him anymore, its something weird between friends and not. distance would be great, and im getting that in a way because were off school for half term, although i have his snao and we do streaks so im technically seeing him every day.

any thoughts on the buzz cut tho? (in general)

high time for a new crush indeed 🙌 im looking but no one else has caught my eye :/ any ideas how???

sorry sorry for the rant omg 😭 somehow i enjoy telling this story because of how complex it is but i like telling it to you as well ❤ idk something about you makes me wana tell you the whole tea lol.

i get what you mean, i think its great that they have good communication and all because all healthy relationships are built on that, but idk we're teenagers so the thought of telling my bf "hey by the way this guy ive been having that weird spat with told me he didnt like me today, what about you?" is just... off. the fact she evens knows i exist because of that (or if he told her even before which is sus because he did the doing before innit) seems... awkward. it just feels really cringey, man. most things, not all things tho.

maybe tell someone but not ur gf, that feels disrespectful to both of us in some weird way.

damn right. he actually had a bit of a stutter around me when we first met! its gone now, but weve also spent a while around each other. hmm, i get that; obviously there's definitely a lot of people he would find attractive at our school (we have some genuine REALLY pretty gils here, like, super hot) (as you can tell, i am bi ❤) but hes not staring at all of THEM in a sus way. like, this was a whole thing. hes not gt a thign with all of them.

yeah, well, i dont want to DATE him if that makes any sense so its good he doesnt, but like, idk man. i hope he wants to stay with her because if they break up because of me its not going to end well in a lot of ways because im sure that me and C.S.M.B wouldnt last, even if we did date, his gf would hate me forever and rightfully so, and her bestie, my bitchy friend, would not mind her own fucking bsuiness and ruin things in the friendship group for me so lets hope whatever it is no beef goes down 🙏 also i dont like him because i know him better this year, so it would be a whole problem so its good the way it is 👍

all i need him to do is start talking to me regularly and then we can be friends and i can focus on my future crush 👌

its deffo fun and I NEED TO GET A NEW CRUSH BUT IDK HOW MAN ANYONE CAN YOU HELP ME OUT easier said than done ofcccccc

yayyy i really hope you like that playlist, i live breathe eat those songs, so lets give C.S.M.B a round of applause for helping me come up with it 👏

hmm, maybe. its a bad law :/

oh, hes definitely scared of me. he listens to me when im talking to other people and im a BEAST in class (and outside) so hes rightfully scared of me 👍 its absolutely hilarious but i think he was more confused

well, we were on the bus, and i said "guys we should come up with a nickname so other people dotn know who we mean" and my friend was like... "...what about toothpaste?" i think she saw an ad for toothpaste somehwere lmaooo any other explanation would be... ...questionable.

i would love for that too. shes probs hot so i wouldnt say no to that 🤣🥴😏😈

i wonder what your followers think about this series lol, The Very Deep and Complicated Love Life of Sythe ? someone give this sitcom a name 💀 i hope they're not too sick of it lmaoo i know this has nothing to do with him :/

but thank you so much for listening to me ranting about C.S.M.B, i appreciate it so much!!! <3

here is an anakin for you:

this is my favourite anakin ever, hayden looks very hawt and sexc in this <3

i alos possess a rare coloured edition of this photo 😈

anywaysss bye oli love u!

i also really like eyes 🤭 and i get it, i just think you should fixate on someone else bc there are plenty of cuties and this one seems like a dead end. take the trash out 😂🗑 i have no idea how to find a new crush…maybe start trying to intentionally pay attention to other people in your school/your life? see if anyone seems interesting or cute hehe

it’s funny cause when i was in high school i was listened to T Swift You Belong With Me and hyper focusing on small interactions with my crush and i haven’t been in high school for years but ppl are still doing that same exact thing 😂 i guess high school never changes. now that i have an *adult brain* though, i can tell you that you should be focusing on people who are nice to you and if he can be a good friend great, but if not, boy bye

thank you for my Anakin. this concludes this episode of the sad beautiful tragic love life of sythe 😂

[cassie-moore]

Making late lunch-been working like crazy calls w 12 countries now time zone is peace for a bit

Glance at this - have a draft

I didnt log feeling draft-reading back on it. My feelings are always so raw late at night. Maybe because my heart is more open and i allow my thoughts/mind and heart to communicate. I feel like during day I block them from eachother (maybe a survival tactic i developed to protect my heart idk)

Last nights raw…

TR whole thing to feel 5/16

Got an alert he posted im too afraid to look at moment or i wont be able to get that sleep. Too much info in my dm, and im too sick of seeing her. Dont know if shes w him again out there. But if i saw her out there w him i wouldnt be able to even process it let alone check absorb that before i went to sleep. If shes not there w him, im sure shes sending him selfies of her face prob looking pouty that shes not w him. Or if he asked her not, it would prob last a week and then pick right bk up when she got comfortable again. Because its who she is.

Been seeing pictures of her taking pictures of the sidewalk or herself for an entire year of my life. If anyones posts could make someone feel like theyre losing braincells, its hers.

Its somehow not even the posts or array but more the fact that you know that prob six of her seven days a week are centered around her posting on the gram

I dont get it, yet he must think thats normal for a girl? Idk

By my late twenties i had my series 7 63 65 and 31. Had already lived for a couple yrs and been an actress in LA, Built a $65 million dollar book of business that had nothing to do w my dads team at ms

Fck.. The Ptree Group manages like $14 Billion in assets now, and just landed The Weather Channels stock plan

Point - im so damn terrified inside my heart that he is will choose this chick forever. I dont know if Id be more depressed for myself or for him . Having to watch her alongside him was like watching paint dry for a year (literally) …i cant do it anymore

My average looking non-famous guy friends said theyd choose me no question over that (two saying they didnt find her attractive), but yet the man of my life who stamped his name in music so hard that he has fan girls scrambling in their heels everywhere around the globe chooses to be in an actual relationship with her. Potentially even marriage. The whole thing has felt like a mind fuck for me to wrap my head around and my biggest fears lies in the fact that the only part that makes sense for me exists in his arms

Thre it is. Yearning ache again

I just feel like deep down shes a girl shell of person his persona g-e would have entertained for a night before but now, deep down i just feel like the real Gerald would no way green earth give up his intellect or creative or drive to appease her laziness and ever stay happy about it

Log all these feelings, sleep them off, come out of cocoon, take a hot shower - crawl in bed. Think about how nice if would be in bed with him - under covers naked w him - fall asleep to that