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veethefreeelf · 6 months

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Love is a strong word - Y.JH

This is part 2 to ‘Hate is a strong word’ I’M SORRY it took a while but real life got in the way also my eye is being extra annoying! I hope you guys love this as much as I do (づ๑•ᴗ•๑)づ♡

Summary:

It’s been a year since you moved away to a new branch. If you’re being honest, things haven’t been great. Being away from all you know and all you wanted has made you realize a lot of things and made you wish you had done things differently. Maybe moving back would be better for you.

Wordcount: 15k

Warnings: lots of conflict and resolutions, super emotional, angsty as fuck, protected v. penetration, fingering, lots of praising and fluff, nothing major, smut is pretty tame and loving, biting because yes

Requested: yes, by popular demand

P.S - Italic is for thoughts mainly from the characters’ perspective and quotes. Bold is for text messages/calls/voice messages between characters

It’s been a year since you moved to this new city and another branch at your company. It isn’t exactly going like you thought it would. You thought you would make friends easily. You thought your career would have progressed. You thought you wouldn’t think that much about Jeonghan. You were wrong on all counts.

Your career was still at the same stage it was when you moved. No exciting opportunities had opened. You had met some really nice people and your new team was great but you missed your team, you missed your best friends. You even missed Clara’s perverted comments on a daily basis. You missed the team meetings. You missed Jeonghan. You missed him a lot.

One thing moving to a smaller town and being new will do to you is give you time to think about the past. You had thought a lot about Jeonghan. What your feelings for him were. Why you were trying to keep him away. Why you told yourself you were fine with him being on a date with Hana while fucking you. Being away from all of them gave you a lot of clarity on a lot of things from your past. It also allowed you to feel things without fear and embrace everything you were too scared to do before.

Too bad it was too late.

You don’t know what happened with Jeonghan and Hana but you imagine them being happy together. And it devastated you. You should’ve said something. You shouldn’t have ran. You were a coward and it made you lose one of the best things in your life all because of pride.

No one from your previous team ever found out about you and Jeonghan. And every time you visited them or they visited you, the subject was never brought up. And, if you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t want to know. ‘Ignorance is bliss’ you tell yourself. At least this way you can pretend he doesn’t hate you now and that he is single and waiting for you. Your therapist disagrees and hopes you will face all your fears the next time you see him.

That’s another thing you did when you moved here. You got help. You got a therapist and it has helped you a lot. If anything, at least this year has made you grow as a person and made you realize how you should’ve handled most things in your life in the past. She has also helped you figure out ways for you to deal with your current feelings and given you tools to keep improving yourself to make sure you make the right decisions for yourself in the future.

It was okay living here though. The apartment wasn’t the best. You missed your baby terribly but you managed. You were adjusting fairly well. Initially, you had cried every day. It was very difficult to not see your people and not sleep in your bed. Now you were better. You were dealing with the consequences of your decision in a better way. You tried visiting your friends more and tried getting to know your new team more as well. You couldn’t deny that you did want to go back. To the branch, to your team, to your apartment, to… Everything that you left behind. But you didn’t think that opportunity would happen any time soon.

Work was always uneventful. All teams got along great and it was easy making decisions together. Also being a smaller branch, you didn’t get as many big accounts, so sometimes it was just a bit too slow for you and what you were accustomed to.

Today you had to finish the monthly report to your manager but not much else was going on so you let your team go home early for the day. You were having a hard time focusing on your work. Something that seems to have started when you moved here. You didn’t use to have this issue before. You were in the middle of your thoughts when your phone rang and snapped you out of it. You looked at it and smiled before answering.

“Hoshi, my beloved… Why are you calling me during work hours?”

“Seriously, this is your fault. Why would you leave us? This new manager is driving us insane” Hoshi told you in a whispered tone.

“Come on… He can’t be that bad. I heard really good things about him from when he was a team member here”

“I don’t know what kind of lies they told you but he is insane. His demands are outrageous. Remember how Jeonghan used to annoy us because he just wanted to? Well, this new guy has made Jeonghan annoy us even more and now Jeonghan is actually right! Can’t you understand how wrong this is?” Hoshi asked you.

“Here I thought I was special and Jeonghan only annoyed me. I guess we were all played, huh?” you asked Hoshi playfully.

“This isn’t funny, Y/N. Jeonghan has to be an asshole now because someone has to stop this guy. He is not ready to be a manager. You need to help us, say something to someone about him, please. I am begging you. We are begging you. And you owe us from leaving us with this lunatic” Hoshi answered in a very serious tone.

“Look, I can try and find out more about him and talk to my manager to see if anything can be done. But you know I don’t have that kind of power. You need to go to HR. Talk to Cass, she is usually the best person to reach for these things and she happens to be super close with Sunny. I will do the best I can on my side but I can’t guarantee anything” you told him sincerely.

What you didn’t tell him was that you wished you could switch with their manager and get back to your team. You hadn’t told them yet that you wanted to be back. It’s not a possibility and it would only make everyone sadder. You were done being selfish.

“I know. I know, Y/N. It’s just… Why can’t you come back? This guy is clearly not a good fit for our branch and for our team” Hoshi told you in a sad tone.

“It’s not my choice anymore. There’s no openings at all Hoshi. And I made a commitment to this branch when I moved here. I can’t just up and leave”

“You say that but we both know your worth and how much this company needs you. They would do anything you wanted to keep you. You could request to come back specially with all of us not getting along well with the new team lead. And it’s nothing personal. He just isn’t good at being a manager and he isn’t ready for it at this branch yet” Hoshi continued sincerely.

“I will speak to my manager about him, okay? But that’s all I can do for right now. You should reach out to Cass in HR on your side. The whole team should actually. And any other team that is also being affected by this should speak up as well” you added sternly.

“Okay, Y/N. Thank you. I have to go before he loses his shit. I hope you’re well and please, visit us soon” he said and you both hung up.

In a way Hoshi was right. You could request this change to the company. And it would make sense. Their new manager came from this branch where things are much slower and much easier. He was not ready for the big leagues as a manager at least. It would be easy to convince your manager.

For now, you would do the right thing and put your personal feelings aside. You would talk to your manager just like you promised Hoshi and it would be up to them on how to proceed from here.

There was a knock on your door and one of your team members - Chris - walked in.

“I thought I told you to go home for the day. Nothing to do around here for now” you told him and smiled.

“Well, you know me. I can’t leave with the boss still around. Hardly seems fair. Also I like to work for my money, thank you very much” he added as he started to move to sit on the chair across from you.

“Never met anyone that wouldn’t rush out of the office if told by their bosses before. Also please don’t call me boss. I told you so many times Chris” you said. Chris smiled.

Chris was a lovely guy. He was your right hand at this branch. He introduced you to everyone and made it easier for you to adjust to the change. He is also one of your best team members. Very hard working and constantly looking to improve and progress his career as well. He reminds you of a younger you.

The only problem with Chris is that he seems very interested in you. He has reached out to you about his feelings several times and wants you to give him a chance. This is one of the reasons you mostly haven’t gotten to know your team in the same way you tried with your previous team.

He was gorgeous. Tall. Muscular. Beautiful Australian accent. You were simply not interested. You had someone else in your mind and in your heart and even though you weren’t strong enough and brave enough to do anything about it, you knew you could never start something new with someone else without resolving the past.

Chris knew it too. Well not the whole ‘having feelings for someone else’ part but that you weren’t interested. And he had been very understanding. He hadn’t pushed at all. Simply told you if anything changed, he would always be open to explore your relationship further. It was sweet. He was one of the few things that kept you sane over here and you didn’t want to lose him.

“Are you going to be done soon? I was thinking maybe we can leave together?” Chris asked you.

“Sorry, no. I’ve been procrastinating for the last 20 minutes and now I’m late in delivering this. You go ahead and leave. I’m also going to try and catch the actual boss before leaving” you told him and he got up to leave.

“Alright, Y/N. See you tomorrow, have a great night” he told you before leaving.

Thankfully, your manager was still here as well and you were able to talk to him about the new team lead that Hoshi told you about. Seungkwan was his name. He was a very passionate team lead over here and yes, demanding but no one had ever had any complaints since he had been promoted. You explained to your boss the pace of the two branches are very different and so are the team members and the demands. You recommended someone check on the teams of the other branch and with Seungkwan himself to understand how everyone is adjusting and if any changes are necessary and your boss agreed.

You’ve done your part. You have warned the right people and now it’s up to them to assess and make decisions.

You got home and called Hoshi to tell him and he was relieved. He also reached out to Cass and everyone else on his team did the same. Apparently, tomorrow the advertising team and some IT members are also going to Cass about Seungkwan. Wow. He really hasn’t made any friends. Poor guy. This branch was very happy with him when he was here. Maybe he just isn’t ready for the amount of work and stress the other branch entails.

During that phone call with Hoshi, he asked you to come visit the following weekend and you agreed. You needed to see all of them. You told him to please arrange for all the team members to be available to hang out and drink and eat and gossip and he was more than happy to start sending voice messages screaming in the group chat you all have together. It made you smile so hard that they were still the same crazy bunch and they still cared so much about you even after you left.

Since you have a big drive to do whenever you visit, you made a request to your boss to book next Thursday and Friday off so you could really enjoy a proper weekend with them and with your apartment. He approved and you were all set for next week. You were so excited too. You couldn’t hide it.

“I wonder if Y/N will ever get this excited to see us in the future” Hyunjin, another one of your team members spoke and it broke you out of your daydream and silly smile.

“Definitely not. We’re the rebound” Felix - your sweetest team member - chimed in.

“Hey! That’s unfair. I’ve never treated any of you like a rebound. How dare you?” you asked Felix and pouted.

Everyone laughed and your team meeting proceeded again without any incidents. Like you said, your team was great and if you hadn’t had the perfect team members before, maybe you could appreciate them more but you truly missed your people. You were so ready to come and see them.

The week went by fast and at last Wednesday arrived and you couldn't wait for the day to end for you to go home and get ready to leave. Before your day was done, your boss called you into his office to discuss something that apparently couldn’t wait until you got back.

“I know you have to leave and I’m sorry to call you in right now but it’s precisely because you are going to visit them over there that I wanted to get this out of the way before you left” he told you once you sat down in front of him.

“I’m not getting fired, am I? That would lead to a depressing weekend” you said jokingly and you both laughed.

“Not at all. This company will do the best they can to keep you around in any branch and you know that as well. You’re far too valuable. This is about the team lead situation you brought to light to me last week, actually” he told you and you sat there silently waiting for him to continue.

“After we talked about it, I brought it up to the head of HR and they actually talked to everyone at that branch including Seungkwan and his manager to understand what could be happening. It was determined that Seungkwan is not ready for a managerial position at that branch just yet. However, he still wanted to stay on as a team member for the marketing team and learn from the new team lead that joins their team instead of coming back to this branch” he added and you nodded.

“Now, as much as the possibility of losing you pains me personally, it’s up to me to let you know that the company is actually giving you the choice. Since you were the one that started bringing this to everyone’s attention and you were extremely successful in leading the team in the other branch before, they wanted to give you the opportunity to return to the branch as team lead if you wanted to”

“Return?” you asked confused.

Your manager laughed.

“Yes. You have one of two options. Return there as team lead and continue on where you left off with the team and to your success or stay here with us” he said and you looked down.

“Look, I know this branch isn’t working exactly as you thought it would for you. I’m not blind to that. Not only that but the opportunities that you were told you were getting here haven’t happened and won’t anytime soon. So even though I don’t want to lose you, I really want you to think it over”

“Does anyone else know about this? Team members, branches?” you asked him.

“No. The managers know but no one else. They will only be told after a decision is made. If you choose to stay with us, they will hire an outsider for the team lead position at the other branch. If you choose to return to your branch, we will most likely promote Chris as the team lead here” he answered you.

“Chris would be great as a team lead for this team. They all trust him and he has seen me do a lot of the team lead tasks so he’ll learn quickly” you told your manager.

“Does this mean you’re choosing to return to them then?” he asked you and you paused.

“No… I don’t know yet. Can I think this over the weekend? I’m assuming you also told me this today to have me think it over while I’m there” you said and laughed lightly.

“Of course and yes, that’s exactly why I told you. Monday we can discuss this more but go have fun and rest” he told you. You said your goodbyes for the weekend and went home to pack and get ready.

It’s funny. You spent most of this year wanting this opportunity to open up. And now that it’s here, you’re hesitating.

Going back there would mean facing a lot of things you left behind. Things you weren’t sure you were completely ready for just yet. Sure, you had been working on yourself and on making better decisions for yourself and on being more honest with everyone around you but you were still scared.

Returning also meant finding out what happened with Jeonghan this last year and you didn’t know if you were ready for that. If he was still dating Hana and you had to start seeing them together every day, you might lose your mind completely. Not knowing anything made you feel that maybe, just maybe, he was waiting for you just like you were waiting for him. You didn’t want that delusion to be shattered by reality.

On the other hand, you missed everyone terribly. You missed the pacing of your job, your people, your apartment, your favorite restaurants. Would you really pass this opportunity up just because you were scared of getting your heart broken?

You haven’t decided yet. Maybe your manager is right. Seeing everyone and going back there can really help you make a final decision and the right decision for yourself personally and professionally.

The next day you were well rested and ready for the drive. All you could think about was seeing your apartment and lying in your bed.

As soon as you got to your apartment, you felt like a new person. You loved the feeling of coming home. Your actual home. You went out to get groceries and came back home to cook a nice meal and hang out at your place. You missed this so much, being by yourself in your home and binging a show on the couch. This was all you had planned for today.

Tomorrow you were meeting them at your usual place where you used to have most of your team building dinners. You missed that place too even if the last time you were there you were faced with Jeonghan and Hana on a date. You were not going to let them ruin a great restaurant for you. Tomorrow you would enjoy hanging out with everyone and hopefully get a better understanding of what the right decision is for you. For now, you’ll just enjoy your cozy home you missed so much.

The next day and a half went by fast and it was now Friday night and you were getting ready to go to dinner. You couldn’t wait to see them and get a little crazy. It’s been such a long while since you were all together like this.

You took a Uber and got to the restaurant a bit early but you were just too excited. As you were getting ready to go in, you heard Hoshi calling your name from across the street.

“Y/N! You’re early! Aren’t you a bit too excited to hang out with your favorite people in the entire world?? Simp” Hoshi yelled from across the street as Seokmin was still getting out of the Uber behind him.

“I missed this restaurant and I’m hungry. Don’t flatter yourself!” you yelled back and the three of you laughed.

Hoshi and Seokmin crossed the street and you finally hugged. You missed them so much.

“We should go in. Everyone else is already here and Shua was already texting me and being clingy. He really missed you” Seokmin said and started moving towards the entrance of the restaurant.

“Shua? You invited him? I thought it was just us” you said and your heart started beating rapidly inside your chest.

“Oh it wasn’t me, Y/N. Hoshi here invited the whole advertising team and they all accepted” Seokmin said as he smiled mischievously at Hoshi.

“Thanks, Seokmin…” Hoshi said and turned to you.

“You invited them? Why? Hoshi I wanted to hang out just us like the old days… I thought I was pretty clear…” you said and Seokmin patted Hoshi on the back and got in the restaurant leaving you both alone.

“Look, they overheard me and I felt bad not inviting them. Shua and Wonwoo talk about you all the time. They miss you too, Y/N”

“Why not invite just them then? Why everyone?” you asked. You were trying to look behind Hoshi into the restaurant but you couldn’t see the table you were all sitting at.

“Is this about Jeonghan? I thought you two were cool…” Hoshi asked as he scratched the back of his head.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. I was just surprised. Thank you for getting everyone together, Hoshi”

He smiled and you both started to go into the restaurant and to the back towards your table. There were a lot of you so they placed your table at the back of the restaurant for more privacy. Also they knew your team well and how loud you could get with drinks in you so it was the overall best option for everyone.

“Stop everything! She has arrived!” Hoshi yelled as you two got to the table and almost everyone jumped.

“I will have a heart attack working with you people” someone you didn’t know spoke up and you stared at Hoshi.

“That’s our new team lead. He invited himself” Hoshi whispered to you.

“So you’re the one terrorizing these teams? Gotta say… Very impressive. Here I thought I was special but you can get everyone just as mad” you said and everyone laughed.

Jeonghan had been staring at you since the moment you walked up to the table. You could feel his eyes on you. You were trying to act normal in front of your team but you wanted to talk to him. Maybe tonight is not the best night to talk things over but you needed to at least understand if there even was a possibility of talking things over. You definitely don’t think you can come back if things are not resolved between the two of you.

Dinner with everyone was easy. Everyone was telling stories and telling you the updates for everything and you even got to know Seungkwan a bit more. He seemed like a wonderful guy. He was loud and he and Hoshi were always on each other’s nerves but if you were to come back, you could see this working well. He would make a wonderful addition as a team member.

Shua, Seungcheol and Wonwoo tried pretending to be upset with you for a bit but that all fell to pieces when you all got into your usual shenanigans. Another thing you realize now that you’re here is that you definitely neglected these three boys when you left. You completely lost touch with them and it wasn’t fair to them. You’re lucky they’re being merciful.

Silvia has gotten really close with Seokmin you can tell. It’s cute. She has always been the quiet one whenever your teams are together and it’s good to see she feels a bit more comfortable around everyone with Seokmin by her side.

Jeonghan didn’t say much throughout the dinner. He laughed sometimes and smiled but didn’t chime in much. You didn’t know what changed (if anything) in his life since you left. Maybe he was doing this on purpose. You wish you were brave enough to ask him directly in front of everyone.

As usual, Clara breaks you out of your thoughts by saying the most outrageous shit out of nowhere.

“So, Y/N… Be honest… Have you fucked that Chris guy on your team yet?”

There is a moment where everyone is silent and then a few seconds later of staring at each other everyone bursts out laughing.

“I missed your ridiculousness, Clara. Thank you, I really needed a good laugh” you said as you continued laughing.

“Oh come on! Seriously! What’s wrong with you? This guy was so fucking hot, I couldn’t believe my eyes when I went there. Almost requested a transfer instantly” Clara added and you kept laughing.

“How hot?” Sunny asked and everyone stared at her still laughing.

“Wow, I leave for a year and Sunny turns into Clara… Seungkwan, you gotta get a handle on the children” you said and Seungkwan laughed.

“Tall, muscular, Australian hunk. Sunny, literally one of the hottest men I’ve seen with my own two eyes and he was all over Y/N. I was so jealous… Why do you always get the hottest guys to be into you and you don’t even take advantage of it? Unfair” Clara answered Sunny and Sunny gasped.

“Do you have pictures?” Sunny asked.

“Of course, I have pictures of all my coworkers on my phone. Because that’s not creepy at all” you added and got up to use the restroom.

“I follow him on Instagram, let me show you” Clara said and you shook your head and continued going to the bathroom.

When you came back, Clara and Sunny were still looking at Chris’s Instagram page and drooling. They started telling you what an idiot you were for not even trying to date him and you just shrugged.

“But seriously, no boyfriends we should know about?” Shua asked and you were surprised by his question.

Everyone turned to you.

“No. Not really interested in dating at the moment. Still have a few things to resolve in that arena in my life before I even consider starting to date again” you answered honestly and you hoped Jeonghan picked up on what you were trying to say.

Shua caught that as well, smiled at you and looked at Jeonghan who was now staring at his empty plate.

Clara and Sunny booed at you and everyone moved on from that topic and continued to chat about changes or new things they purchased or hobbies they started after you left. You were trying hard to pay attention to them but you needed to talk to Jeonghan. He just didn’t seem interested in talking to you.

As you were trying to convince yourself to just go for it, Jeonghan got up and told everyone he had to leave and your heart sank. There goes your chance.

“Late date?” Clara asked as she raised her eyebrows at him and everyone laughed and started telling her off. You pretended to laugh but you didn’t find any of this funny.

“No” was all he said before saying his goodbyes and leaving. He didn’t even look at you before leaving. He was always so unfair. As far as he knows, you may never be back here again. He may never see you again. Yet, he doesn’t seem to care. He doesn’t even care enough to tell you goodbye. Maybe coming back here would be a huge mistake if this is how you’re going to feel every day.

Seokmin snapped you back from your thoughts by squeezing your hand and smiling at you. He didn’t know about you and Jeonghan but he seemed to understand your sadness at that moment while everyone else didn’t notice anything.

You thought about maybe ending the night early but that wouldn’t be fair to anyone else there so you pushed through. You also deserved to have fun with your friends. You have plenty of time to be sad when you get home.

The rest of the night went by fast. The group moved from the restaurant to a karaoke bar and everyone was having a blast. You might have had too much to drink but you needed to stop thinking about Jeonghan and focus on your friends so alcohol it is. You were going to regret this tomorrow.

And regret it you did. You woke up with a huge hangover. Your head was pounding. Why did you drink this much? Oh yeah… Jeonghan. At least everyone seemed to have enjoyed the night. You should’ve drank more water though. You got up, took an ibuprofen, showered and decided to rest more until your headache went away.

It sounded like a good plan and was going great until someone decided to ruin your entire mood by ringing your doorbell. You tried ignoring it and turned around on your bed to go back to sleep but the doorbell kept ringing.

You got up and went to the door. Whoever it was, they better be ready for a fight. You were tired, angry, sad and out of patience for any nonsense today.

You didn’t even check the peephole. You get to the door and you swing it open, ready to fight and when you finally see who’s on the other side, you stop.

“Not a good morning, Y/N?” Jeonghan asks, laughing lightly.

You sigh and gesture at him to come in.

“What gave it away? The disheveled hair? The swinging the door open?” you asked as you sat on the couch.

“The general rage, yes. Had a good time last night after I left, huh?” he asked and he joined you on the couch.

“I forgot how insane they are when they drink. I missed everyone so much that I let myself get carried away. Mistake”

You both laughed. And then there was silence. You couldn’t take this anymore. It was now or never.

“Why did you ignore me last night? You barely said anything or even looked at me. You didn’t even say goodbye. That could’ve been the last time you saw me and you didn’t even say anything. Why?” you asked him.

“I’ll never be able to say goodbye to you, Y/N. I couldn’t do it a year ago and I can’t do it now” he answered without hesitation.

You nodded.

“Why did you come here today? You didn’t seem to be interested in talking to me yesterday” you asked again.

“It wasn’t easy seeing you. After all this time. I went there because I needed to see you but I didn’t know if I should be there. If you wanted me there. I didn’t want to ruin your night but I couldn’t not go. I was being selfish”

“So you decided to leave early yesterday and come here today and ruin a whole new day for me?” you asked in a playful tone but he didn’t laugh with you.

“I wanted to see you, Jeonghan. I know I wasn’t being obvious about it yesterday but everyone was there. I didn’t want to ruin the night for them. It was the first time we were all together in a long time. I couldn’t be selfish. But I wanted to be” you added to your previous statement.

He nodded.

“Then can we talk? Right now? It’s why I came here. There’s a lot of things we need to talk about. I should’ve done this earlier. Way before last year even. I’m a coward when it comes to you” Jeonghan said.

“Yes, please” you answered and you both smiled.

“I’ve never been the smoothest guy around. The guy that can easily talk to a girl he likes. I’ve always gotten weird and acted stupid. I don’t know why. And now I would like to think I’m better but back then when we met 6 years ago, I was still that stupid kid that didn’t know how to act when he liked a girl. That’s kind of why this started. Back then, when I first saw you, I wanted to get to know you more. You were so beautiful, I still remember what you were wearing the first day we met. But you didn’t seem to notice me. At all. The only time you acknowledged me was in an interdepartmental meeting when I made a snappy comment and you started getting snarky with me. I thought this was my shot. This is how you were going to notice me” he started and you scoffed.

“So you decided to be an asshole from then on? Why not just come to me and talk to me?” you asked.

“Like I said, I was a dumb kid. I wanted your attention but I wasn’t brave enough or confident enough to simply walk up to you and start a conversation so I decided having you mad at me was better than having you not know I even existed. Things went downhill fast from there. You were hating me more and more and I was… Liking you more and more. But after a year of this dynamic, I didn’t know how to stop it and just talk to you. Seungcheol always gave me so much shit for it. He kept saying I was going to regret not having talked to you and gotten to know you the proper way. That it was going to bite me in the ass and he was right” he sighed as he continued.

So that’s what Seungcheol meant when he asked you if you didn’t know why Jeonghan treated you this way. He knew all along of Jeonghan’s feelings for you and he probably thought you knew as well, somehow.

“Y/N, I’ve had feelings for you from day one. That’s why it hurt so much hearing you say you hated me even if I brought it on myself. When you gave me a chance to have you in my arms, even if it was just that night at the party, I didn’t hesitate. I couldn’t. I had wanted you for so long. Desperate for your attention. Part of me wishes I stopped myself from having you that night. I should’ve told you the truth right there but I couldn’t risk you leaving. I was selfish that night too”

You looked down and he sighed.

You didn’t know what to say. Even though this made sense, it also didn’t. You still had so many questions. You needed to know everything. No more fear. No more being a coward.

You looked back at Jeonghan.

“Why did you sleep with Hana then? If you had feelings for me from the start?” you asked and he laughed.

“Another stupid mistake I made because of my feelings for you” he said and you raised an eyebrow at him.

“Do you remember the only year we had the Christmas party at the office? The one where the office almost got destroyed?” he asked and you nodded.

“Before that party I promised myself I was going to talk to you. Really talk. Maybe drunkenly confess my feelings for you and hope for the best. But you spent the first few hours of that party with Jackson. Smiling and laughing and having fun and I was fucking miserable watching you two. I started drinking a bit too much and when Hana came to me I thought ‘fuck it’. If you could live your life and probably end up dating Jackson, I could fuck whoever I wanted too. I didn’t really think about the consequences of sleeping with her until it was done. She told the whole office and the look of disgust you gave me when you found out was enough for me to realize that if I hadn’t ruined all my chances with you before, I definitely had then”

“You’re an idiot” you told him.

“I know” he agreed.

“Even if you regretted it afterwards, you seemed to have a good time. She said a lot of things about that night. Hard to believe you cared about me that much but fucked her that good. Or maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic that doesn’t understand fucking without feelings” you said and you looked down.

You know you wanted the truth but you had forgotten how much the truth could hurt.

“You fucked me and you hated me though” he said and you scoffed.

“You really are an idiot…” you said and sighed.

He looked at you with a puzzled look in his eyes.

“Don’t look so confused. I’ll explain my side soon. Continue” you told him.

“About what she said, it was all lies. I may have been drunk but I remember that night clearly. It was terrible. I didn’t even put in an effort. I didn’t care. I was picturing you the whole time, I’m actually surprised I didn’t say your name. Probably because nothing felt good. I just wanted to get it over with. When we were done, I left immediately without even saying a word to her. I was disgusted with myself. I went to sleep that night hoping you would never find out about it. You know I’m like you, I know you’ve heard it around the office too. I don’t just fuck people, I don’t do the fuck buddy thing. I’ve always been looking for the real deal. I will always regret that night” he said and you started to understand him a bit more, but there were still a couple of things on your mind when it came to Hana.

“Why let her hang around you all the time at the office? If you were mad about her telling everyone and if you really weren’t interested, why let her follow you around and grab you whenever she wants?” you asked.

He smiled at you.

“The first time she did it in front of you, it seemed like you were jealous. I didn’t know if it was wishful thinking on my part, but the look in your eye when she started touching me gave me hope. Again, I’m an idiot, I know” he answered and now it actually made you laugh lightly.

“Can’t argue with that” you said and he laughed with you.

“Last question about her and I think you know what’s coming” you said and he sighed and nodded.

“If all of this is true, what happened when I met you both at the restaurant? She said you were on a date. Why?”

“This one is actually an easy one to answer. We were never on a date. Woozi in IT invited me out for dinner and drinks to join their team dinner since I wasn’t doing so well and I agreed. When the time of the dinner came, everyone else canceled except her so I was stuck with her. Not sure if it was her plan all along but I know Woozi wouldn’t do that to me so I guess it worked in her favor somehow. I decided to stay because I was hungry and tired and wanted a drink and then we ran into you. When she said it was a date, I really wanted to say something different but the look in your eyes… I knew I needed to explain myself outside of that situation. You weren’t going to let me do it there specially since you were late for your team dinner”

He does know you well. You would’ve left either way that night. What you still don’t understand is why he didn’t tell you all of this before you left.

“Why didn’t you tell me all of this? Why did you let me leave thinking you were fucking me while dating her?” you finally asked.

“Before that restaurant situation, you had been distancing yourself from me. I didn’t know why but I was too scared to find out. I thought maybe you were done. With us. With me. I didn’t think you would want to hear anything from me anymore. And when you also didn’t reach out or asked for an explanation about Hana, I thought that meant you didn’t care. I thought you didn’t care if I was dating her or not because we were just fucking. I thought if I reached out and told you the truth, you were going to tell me it was just sex. That it was never more than that between us. I didn’t want to hear that”

“So you let me leave? No goodbye. No explanation. Just a text. How do you think I felt when you did that?” you asked with tears in your eyes now.

“I know how much I fucked up. After sending that text and staring at my phone, I realized I would rather let you know the whole truth even if it meant you rejecting me than this. I drove to your place but when I got there, you were gone” he added and he also had tears in his eyes now.

“Why didn’t you ever call me? Or even texted me? Why not tell me all of this even if I was away?” you asked him as you cried softly.

“I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me. You had this new life now in a different city with new people. I thought you were over whatever happened with us”

“I spent this whole year thinking about you” you said and he nodded sadly.

There was a silence in the room with you now.

He had told you the whole truth. Since the very first day. No more hiding.

It was your turn now but you didn’t even know where to start so you told him just that.

“Thank you for telling me this now. I also have some explaining to do but I don’t even know where to start…”

“From the beginning. From when we met, please. I need to know” Jeonghan told you and you agreed.

“I thought you were the most beautiful human I’d ever seen. When we first met. I’m also not the best at talking to people I like. I usually don’t, at all. I stay away and just enjoy the person from afar. It seems easier than being rejected. Adding that to how obsessed I was with the company and being hired there, I guess it would have seemed like I didn’t notice you at all. But I did. Which is why I was so pissed every time you were an asshole to me. Not only was the career I dreamed of taking a hit but the guy I had a crush on apparently wanted to destroy my career” you said and laughed.

He laughed with you.

You were both idiots.

“After that, I accepted that you just hated me. I had to move on or I would end up breaking my own heart. So I told myself that I hated you. I would hate you from then on and treat you exactly like you were treating me. I spent years avoiding what I really felt about you. It seemed easier that way. I needed to focus on my career and ignore whatever was going on with you. It was the smartest decision for me” you told him and continued.

“I didn’t realize all of this until I left though. Being away and getting a therapist helped me realize all of my feelings for you. Made me understand what I did wrong and what I wish I could change. Distancing myself from you after our last night here was a huge mistake. But at the time I was confused. I still thought I didn’t like you at all so how could I let you in here. I didn’t want to see the truth. I wasn’t ready for it. It’s easier now, even if it hurts, knowing exactly what my feelings for you are” you added.

“Is that why you didn’t say anything after the restaurant incident?” he asked you.

“Yeah. I had already been distant from you trying to sort out my feelings and when I saw you with her I made my decision. Maybe it was best if we stopped whatever it was we were doing. Then when we didn’t speak after that and my manager gave me the option to leave, again, it seemed easier than trying to deal with everything. I used my career as an excuse but I just wasn’t ready to face this. I am now” you answered.

You were trying to explain everything to him but sometimes it’s hard to put all of this in words. It’s been 6 years of confusion and misunderstandings. Where do you go from here?

“I don’t want to ask this but what about Jackson? What happened at the Christmas party?” he asked and it surprised you.

“Honestly I don’t even remember that party at all. I don’t remember spending that much time with Jackson. I never liked him and I always knew he was just trying to fuck me. I was nice to him at first but I guess over time I lost patience and that’s why now it may be more obvious of how not interested I am” you told him and he nodded.

“And Chris?” he asked in a more hushed voice.

You laughed.

“Chris is a great guy. And he has told me he’s interested in me. I told him no. I still had things from my past to sort out and wasn’t interested. He understood. We’re friends. Sure, he still hopes one day I’ll give him a chance but I already told him many times not to wait for that” you said and he smiled.

You smiled too.

You weren’t sure if there was anything else he wanted to know but it seems most of your past issues have been explained on both sides. Past has been resolved in a way. But what about the future? Is there a future? You’re trying to figure out how to ask this question when he interrupts your thoughts.

“What about now? What happens now? You’re still living far away, it would be tricky but I want to see you again. And a lot more. Maybe we can go back to how things were between us…” Jeonghan said and the last part he said with more nervousness in his tone.

Thing is… He still didn’t say what his feelings were. He said he liked you but that could mean anything. Now he wants to go back to how things were? No… That’s not what you want at all. You thought you had been clear.

“No, I don’t want to go back to how things were. I know that for sure” you told him and his smile fell from his face.

“Oh… Hmm… Okay… I thought that was what we both wanted. I guess I got that wrong” he said as he started to get up from the couch and move towards the door.

“Wait, where are you going? You didn’t let me finish” you said as you followed behind him.

“No, I get it. I thought things could go back to that but they can’t. We’ve been hurting each other for so long. I wouldn’t want to be with me either. Sorry. I should go. I’m meeting Seungcheol for lunch but thanks for listening to me” he said as he left your apartment.

You were left alone, in the middle of your living room, confused and staring at your door.

‘What the hell just happened?’ you asked yourself. You thought the conversation was going well. You were both reaching an agreement so why would he leave. He didn’t even let you explain what you meant when you said you didn’t want things to go back to the way things were. Was that all he wanted from this? To explain everything and then go back to just fucking each other? Why was he always so confusing? Things between two people aren’t supposed to be this difficult. You can’t even hold a conversation without misunderstandings. How was this ever going to work?

You were left confused and wondering what any of it meant for the both of you.

The rest of the weekend went by fast. You met up with some of the guys for lunch and just to hang out and Sunday came fast. Before you knew it, it was time to leave again. You couldn’t leave without trying to understand what went wrong and what you said that made Jeonghan leave so abruptly. You decided to call him. He didn’t answer so you texted him.

“Hey, I’m sorry to bother you and do this on short notice but I would really like to see you before I have to leave today. I feel like our conversation ended and you left on another misunderstanding. Can you please, make some time for me today? I have to leave by 6PM, the latest. I’m free the rest of the day. Let me know, okay?”

Nothing.

He didn’t answer the text. He never called you back.

It was 6:30PM and you were still in your apartment staring at your phone, waiting for him.

Crying, you pick up your bags and get ready to leave.

This would never work. He is unable to resolve things by talking. He always runs away from you. You would end up getting your heart broken in the future.

Not that your heart isn’t broken right now. You opened up to him and told him the whole truth and somehow he chose to listen to the wrong thing and leave. This time you were proud of yourself though. You reached out to him and you tried to resolve everything before having to leave again. It was his choice to not listen. There’s only so much you can do. Relationships are a two way street. You can’t keep fighting for something while the other person simply gives up and walks away. It’s exhausting and you will always end up in tears.

Maybe this was for the best.

That four hour drive was done listening to sad songs and trying to tell yourself you’ll be just fine. You still had no fucking clue of what you wanted to do. Even though you had an amazing time with everyone including the new guy, this situation with Jeonghan might prove to be a little too much for you to handle.

You needed to sleep on this and hope your boss didn’t ask you for your answer first thing in the morning.

The next day you went to work and went back to normal. The usual meetings, usual coachings, usual schedule. It felt normal.

By the end of the day you still didn’t know what to do. You missed everything about the other branch, city and people. But you didn’t know if your heart could take any more hits. Going back there wasn’t going to be easy.

You were split.

It was the end of the day and you were packing up to go home. Your boss hasn’t mentioned it at all. You talked about work during the day and he checked-in with you and the team but he didn’t ask you anything else. You felt relieved. Maybe he would give you more time before making a final decision.

As you reached for the door of your office to leave, there’s a knock.

It was your boss.

Fuck. You knew it was too good to be true.

“Hey again, Y/N. Going home?” he asked you.

“Yup. Not a fan of overtime especially when the work's all done” you told him and you both laughed.

“Look, I don’t want to pressure you but we have their branch breathing down our necks. They need an answer asap. I assume you don’t have one yet since you didn’t talk to me about it but just a heads up, they might contact you directly if you take too long deciding” he let you know and you sighed.

“I want to go back. Nothing against this branch but it’s just a bit too slow paced for me. You’re a great manager and I’ve really enjoyed my time here but it’s been difficult adjusting even to my apartment. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier today. Not gonna lie, before this moment, I had no clue what I wanted but as soon as you asked me I knew what the answer was” you answered him and he laughed.

“I get it. You and that team are the dream team. Hard to move on from that when that’s what you love. I don’t hold it against you. We can let the team here know tomorrow so that you can start helping Chris with stepping into the role, is that okay?”

“Of course but this soon? When do I have to leave by?” you asked a bit surprised on how fast this was moving.

“They want you back there asap. I don’t blame them either. I’ll let them know of your decision and let’s say two weeks? Would that be enough time for Chris to get prepared? What do you think as his current team lead?”

“That’s more than enough time. Like I told you before, Chris was already aware and saw me do a lot of the team lead’s tasks. It should be an easy adjustment for him” you said and he nodded.

“Alright, then! Have a good night and we’ll meet with your team first thing in the morning” your manager told you as he walked out with you.

“One more thing… Can we not tell the team over there? I wanted to surprise them, if that’s okay?” you asked your manager and he laughed again.

“I’m okay with it. Let me ask them over there and I’ll let you know tomorrow, yeah?” he answered you and you nodded.

You got to your apartment, sat down on the couch and started laughing.

You have no idea what came over you but when your manager asked what you wanted to do, you couldn’t help but say you wanted to go back. This whole thing with Jeonghan won’t be easy and you will hurt but at least you’ll be around the people you love most in the world, in your comfy home that you love so much.

You couldn’t wait to leave.

The next two weeks went by so slow. Every day seemed to drag on forever. This was how bad you wanted to go back.

Your team was sad but they understood your decision and they were also super excited about having Chris step up.

You spent those two weeks helping Chris and preparing him for the role and by the end he was full on taking care of the team while you shadowed along. Maybe that’s why the days went by even slower at the end. You were watching Chris do your job and reporting to your manager but you weren’t doing much more.

Your manager was able to convince the other branch about keeping this a secret for now. Seungkwan was informed and he also promised to not say anything since he knew what this meant for you all. He may have only spent that one night around all of you but it was clear to him you belonged there with the team and that he still had a lot to learn before stepping up at that branch.

It was difficult not to say anything in the group chat specially since your team figured out some moves in the team were going to happen but they just didn’t know what and they kept talking about it and speculating. They were suspicious it had to do with Seungkwan since they all filed the same complaint with HR but they weren’t sure since Seungkwan wouldn’t tell them either.

The day before you left you had dinner with Chris and the boys to say goodbye. They were a great team, really. You just didn’t belong here with them. You hoped the best for them and you knew Chris would grow a lot more in the future if he kept working the way he had.

The next day you drove home. Home. Felt good to say and to think about. You couldn’t wait to get there.

You had to be careful once you got there though. You didn’t want to get caught and be told on before Monday. Clara lives very close to you so grocery shopping was going to be a risk but you had to risk it because there was no way you weren’t going to cook and enjoy some nice home cooked meals.

Those days went by fast and so far no one had found out you were back and would be back working at the branch.

When you got to the office, you went straight to your manager’s office and as soon as you walked in, you two shared a huge hug. She had missed you just as much as you had missed her. Having another woman team lead to fight Jeonghan’s manager was much needed since he had been on a whole other level after you left.

Part of you thinks your manager asked the whole office to join the meeting so that she could rub it in his face that you were back permanently to make his life hell if needed.

The time for the meeting was finally here and your heart was beating fast. You’re excited to see your team’s reaction but also you can’t deny that you want to see how Jeonghan reacts.

How can something so simple be so terrifying?

When everyone was gathered in the big conference room, your manager started the meeting by saying there would be a few changes happening in the marketing team. She kept her speech short and gave Seungkwan the floor.

“So as you guys know, I transferred here from a much slower branch. When I was team lead there things were very different. I adjusted well and got along well with everyone. Here, things have been tricky. Even though I get along with my team on a personal level, things have been less than ideal on a professional level. When all of this became clear to all of us, I was approached by my manager and I was informed I was going to be replaced here as team lead. I could either choose to stay here as a member of the marketing team, or go back to my previous branch as team lead” he paused then and everyone started looking around in confusion. Probably because they knew you were the team lead at that branch so what did this all mean?

“Well, I chose to stay here as a team member. I wanted to learn from the new team lead whoever that was. Initially I didn’t know who that was. The final decision hadn’t been made but once I found out who it was, I was incredibly happy to be working and learning from her. I don’t want to prolong this anymore than I already have so let’s all please, welcome the new team lead for our marketing team!” he said and started clapping.

Everyone else joined and started to look around trying to find the person who was replacing Seungkwan.

You got in the room from behind your manager and as soon as Hoshi’s eyes landed on you, he ran to you and picked you up while screeching like an insane bird.

“Put me down, you maniac!” you said and as soon as he did everyone from your team ran up to hug you.

“Better surprise than last time?” you asked and they all nodded.

You were all in your little world and your manager interrupted you.

“Not to ruin this family reunion but do you have a few words for everyone?” she asked.

“I’m not very good at these things as you probably found out last time so I don’t have a lot to say. It was a good experience over there but not enough for me professionally. Also I missed my team and my home. And now I’m back so I’m looking forward to working and/or fighting some of you” you said and everyone laughed.

You found Jeonghan in the back behind everyone. He had a blank expression on his face and as soon as your manager told everyone they could go, he was the first one out the door.

You were disappointed but not surprised. This reaction was very him.

Shua, Wonwoo and Seungcheol ran up to you and welcomed you back. Told you they missed you. Silvia was a bit more chill about it but you could tell she was happy mostly because Seokmin was happy to have you back. You’ll take it either way.

From then on everything went back to normal. Usual team meetings, usual interdepartmental meetings, usual lunch with everyone. After three weeks, it felt like you had never left. Seungkwan was a great addition to your team just like you thought. He may have not been ready for the team lead position but he was an extraordinary team member to your team.

Everything went back to what it was supposed to be. You were so happy to be back even if things with Jeonghan stayed the same. He never answered that text and never called you back and ever since you came back, he never spoke to you. You talked during meetings but about work only. He seemed to have found a good balance of being an asshole and simply accepting your teams’ proposals when they made perfect sense. Everything was going great but somehow, when you were alone in your office and at home, you still felt empty.

Right now you were in your office, looking out the window. The day has been going okay so far, you just didn’t feel good. It seems the more time passes like this between you and Jeonghan, the worse you feel every single day.

As you were almost falling asleep in your chair staring out the window, there was a knock at your door. You asked them to come in and to your surprise, Shua walks through the door.

“May I come in and sit? Do you have a few minutes to chat, Y/N?”

“Hmm… Yeah, go ahead. Surprisingly, it’s been a slow day. What do you need to talk to me about? Is it about the Privé campaign proposal?”

“Actually it’s not work related. It’s personal” he said and you started to get nervous.

You gulped.

“Okay” was all you said.

“Look, I don’t know how your conversation went the last time you were here before you moved back but he’s been miserable since then. From what I can tell so far, you haven’t been doing much better so forgive my intrusion but what the hell happened that day?” Shua asked and you just broke down.

You started sobbing. He locked your office door and came back to you to hug you.

You got up from the chair and you both moved to the couch in your office.

“Sorry” you said as he handed you the tissue box from your desk before sitting back down again next to you.

“I don’t know what happened. We were talking and then he just left out of nowhere. Then Sunday I asked him to meet with me so we could fix whatever misunderstanding this was and he ignored both my call and text. He hasn’t spoken to me since that day. I wanted to know what made him leave but he won’t give me the chance” you told him and you tried to stop crying.

“He told me you confessed to him and then turned him down. It didn’t make sense to me at the time but he’s sure you rejected him” Shua said and you looked back at him confused.

“I didn’t reject him, Shua. I told him no when he asked if things could go back to the way they were before with us because that’s not what I want. I… Have feelings for him. Why would I want to go back to being fuck buddies or whatever the fuck we were before?” you asked and you hoped he would understand what you meant.

“You love him and you wanted a relationship… You weren’t rejecting him, you were rejecting being fuck buddies…” he said as he looked around and scoffed.

“Love is a strong word” you told him and sighed.

“Is it though? Look at you two. You’re both miserable and for what? You should be together, Y/N. How much longer are you going to keep hurting each other?” he asked and you got offended.

“Hurting each other? He’s the one that keeps making shit decisions and not listening to me. Even when I reach out to him, he pushes me away. He’s the one constantly breaking my heart and I’m the one stupid enough to keep letting him” you said as you got up back to your desk.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to sound that way. I’m just tired of watching you both fight this. I know you’re tired of trying and being the one pushing but maybe you should do it one last time. Tell him what you told me and make sure he understands you can’t be the only one fighting for the two of you. That he can’t run away any time he thinks he heard something he doesn’t like”

“Is it worth it, Shua? To keep fighting? There’s always been misunderstandings between us, something always happens to break us apart. Maybe it’s a sign we just shouldn’t be together. Being with someone shouldn’t be this difficult. I know a good relationship means hard work but this is too much. I can’t keep fighting for someone who just runs away every time. Just avoids the issue and ignores me. No relationship can survive that”

“I’m a firm believer that nothing good comes easy. You have to put in the work. And I know he fucked up more than once and you’ve been the one carrying all of this but are you really going to let him go just because of this? A silly misunderstanding about him not getting you wanted a relationship? Think about it. He’s a literal man, Y/N. He needs things spelled out to him most times, specially when it comes to the person he loves most in the world. You’ve been through so much together that his mind just picks the negative and runs. It’s not your fault but if you think this relationship could be the real deal, try one more time. Tell him everything. Clearly, with no room for misunderstandings”

You nodded and he nodded back.

He got up to leave and as he was unlocking your office door and leaving he turned back.

“Just think about it, please, Y/N” he said and left.

When you got home that night, it was all you could think about.

You wish you could ask someone. You had never told anyone about you and Jeonghan so you didn’t have anyone to talk to about this and share their opinion. You didn’t know if you should either. This is a decision you need to make by yourself.

You spent the night thinking it over and you decided it was time to be brave and grow up. You wouldn’t do this through text or call. Tomorrow morning you were going straight to his office and you’re going to lay your cards on the table. You’re going to tell him what an asshole he is and that this is his last chance. If he wants it, he’ll have to put in the work from now on. No more running. No more ignoring you. Open communication or it’s not even worth starting anything back up between the two of you.

You couldn’t sleep very well. You woke up nervous and angry. You rushed to the office so you could be there early and talk to him before the day started. But of course, nothing ever goes to plan when it comes to Jeonghan, and your manager called you in to talk about the new accounts that were joining the company and what you and your team should expect from them.

By the time you and your manager were done with that small meeting, everyone was already in the office and working hard. Shit. Should you do this now or later? Fuck it, you need this to be over with. You can’t suffer like this anymore.

You went to his office and of course, the first thing you are greeted with is Hana with her paws all over him, twirling his tie in her hand and laughing. He looked bored. He was leaning against his desk. He still let her do it though and you were beyond angry.

You knocked on his open door and cleared your throat.

He looked up and when he saw it was you, he gulped and tried moving away from Hana.

“Can’t you see we’re busy?” Hana asked you with disdain.

You’re being tested. ‘Please, do not choose murder, please. Stay calm’ you told yourself as you walked in his office towards them.

“Hands off and fuck off, Hana. Don’t you have work to do? As far as I know this is a fucking office so act professional and not like a hormonal teenager or I’ll report you to your team lead and to HR” you told her and she gasped.

Jeonghan just kept looking between the two of you and removed his tie from her hand.

“Jeonghan, say something!” she said as she turned to him and crossed her arms.

You looked at Jeonghan with a tilted head and raised your eyebrows.

“Get out, Hana. Go back to work. You shouldn’t have been here in the first place” he told her as he finally moved away from her completely and sat down on his desk chair.

She scoffed, flipped her hair, looked you up and down and finally left.

You closed his office door behind her and turned back to him.

“Am I just going to have to see that forever or do you plan on telling her to stop it anytime soon? I guess old habits die hard, huh?” you asked as you sat down in front of him.

“I’m sorry” was all he told you.

“Getting fucking sick of hearing that. I need to talk to you and you seem to ignore me through text and phone calls and even around here so you left me no choice. Do you have time now or do you want me to leave?” you asked and he stayed silent.

“Just know that if you tell me to leave, it will be the last fucking time I’ll give you the chance to push me away, so choose wisely” you continued and waited for his answer.

He continued to stay silent.

So be it.

You got up and started to leave his office.

“Stop, please. I’m sorry. Stay. Yes. Let’s talk” he said as he grabbed your hand and pulled you back, closer to him.

“I’m going to make this simple. Joshua talked to me yesterday. He told me you said I rejected you. You really need to start listening to what I say, Jeonghan. I didn’t reject you or your feelings. What I told you was that I did not want to go back to being fuck buddies. I wanted more for us. But you didn’t let me say that. You just got up and left with an assumption that I was rejecting you” you said and you could see the cogs starting to turn in his brain. He was realizing he had fucked up yet again.

“And because I was confused and didn’t understand why you left the way you did, I reached out to you. I wanted to talk it over before I left. I wanted to make everything clear between us and you ignored me again. I waited for you in my home and you didn’t even text back. That really fucking hurt” you continued and you started to cry now.

“You know that weekend I had already been given a choice to either stay there or come back here. After what happened with us, after you broke my heart again, I almost stayed there. But I chose to come back because I was always happier here. Whatever was going on with us, I couldn’t let that stop me so I came back. And you didn’t give a shit. You were the first to leave the meeting and you haven’t spoken a word to me in weeks”

You were getting angrier now. He needed to understand this was his absolute last chance and you were going to make sure you got through to him.

“When Shua talked to me yesterday, he said I should try one more time. Telling you everything clearly so that were no more misunderstandings. I didn’t want to. I can’t be the only one fighting and pushing through the misunderstandings. We can’t keep having these misunderstandings. I deserve better than getting hurt all the time because you won’t talk to me. You just run and ignore the issue and break both of our hearts. You need to choose, Jeonghan. Either you start taking responsibility and we start a mature relationship where we talk to each other about everything that is bothering us or maybe, if you don’t think it’s worth it or you’re not strong enough, we just end everything now. Completely. We’ll be nothing more than coworkers”

This was it.

You were done.

He had all the information he needed to make his choice.

No more ambiguity, no more uncertainty. He needed to choose to either fight for your relationship and stop being scared or let you go.

“You don’t have to answer me right now but--”

He stopped you from talking by kissing you.

His hands were holding your face as he kissed you and you kissed him right back.

You missed him so much. He was such an asshole for torturing you both.

He backed you both up against the back wall of his office and he kept kissing you hard.

You stayed like that for a while. Until your phone started to ring in your pocket.

It was Hoshi. He probably couldn’t find you and he needed you.

“I need to go” you whispered against his lips and he kissed you again.

You started laughing.

“Seriously, I have to go. That’s a yes on the relationship then?” you asked, still holding him.

“Fuck yes, absolutely. I will never let you down again, that’s a fucking promise, angel”

“It better be. Let’s take it slow, yeah? I know that’s a bit of a cliché but I want us to start fresh. Going on dates, getting to know each other. Since we’re both hopeless romantics after all” you said and you both smiled.

“Anything you want, angel”

You left his office and met with Hoshi who was freaking out about something Seungkwan had said. These two will drive you insane but nothing matters right now. All you can think about is Jeonghan. You wondered how things were going to progress between you two from now on.

After a few weeks, you and Jeonghan were doing great. He started by leaving you coffee on your desk every morning with a note and he always checked on you during the day. You had lunch together every day (with your teams but still) and he took you out on dates almost every day.

It may have been too much for some people but you wanted to spend as much time with him as possible and he felt the same. You had dinner together almost every day and you spent the weekends together. You had gone to amusement parks, gone on hikes, you had picnics by the river and so many other good things.

You were slowly getting to know each other and your feelings for him were growing more and more every day. You hoped he felt the same way.

You had been honest with each other about everything. You told him you needed him to put a stop to Hana following him around and being all over him. It made you uncomfortable and he agreed that was a door he needed to close permanently for both of you but also for Hana’s sake. So she could move on. He always talked to you every time he felt insecure or scared and you helped him through it. Your dynamic stayed the same. Always challenging each other and being snarky but you both loved it that way.

You had even met each others’ families already. It was funny watching your families react to you and him dating. You both talked so much shit about each other to your families that everyone was confused when you told them. His sister seemed to be the only one that knew this was exactly how you and him were going to end up.

There were a few things you haven’t done so far. You haven’t told anyone in the office, well except Shua and Seungcheol. And, you haven’t slept together yet. It just didn’t happen. You had been so focused on doing things right and getting to know him that that part hadn’t really been on your mind too much. You already knew that side of him and sure, you missed it but you didn’t want to rush anything. He seemed to feel the same way since he hadn’t made any moves towards that at all. You also haven’t told each other those three words. You wanted to. You knew you loved him. It was clear. It had been clear for a while but you were still scared about that. He hasn’t said them either which has surprised you so far but you understand. He’s probably just as scared as you are.

Next Friday was the regularly scheduled end of quarter party at your company. It was at the usual place, at the usual time and you wanted to be able to enjoy it with Jeonghan but the office still doesn’t know so you decided to ask him about it.

You went to his office during the day and brought it up.

“I was thinking… Maybe we can tell people… In the office… I wanted to go with you to the party and I can’t do that if we keep hiding this…”

“I would like that very much. I’ve wanted to do that since day one, angel”

You smiled and kissed him.

He pulled you closer to stand between his legs and you made a bolder move and straddled him on his desk chair while you kept kissing.

He pulled away from you and held your face with his hands. You moved to kiss him again and he laughed and stopped you.

“Hey… Look at me, angel…”

You stared into his eyes deeply.

“I love you, Y/N” he said and he gulped. He was nervous. It was the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your fucking life. You smiled hard.

“I love you too, Jeonghan”

He smiled just as hard as you and he started to kiss you again. Hard. One of his hands had now moved to your ass and he was pushing you on his cock. He was hard. You telling him you loved him back got him hard. That was fucking hot.

Your kiss started to get more and more heated but neither of you could stop. Not now knowing that you loved each other. Finally hearing it from each others lips was the last straw and you got reminded of how much you missed fucking him. You could feel how desperate he was for you too and you both just couldn’t stop what was happening, neither did you want to.

“Y/N, we need your approval on this. Can you--”

Hoshi and your team barged into Jeonghan’s office and you jumped away from Jeonghan so fast. But not fast enough. Jeonghan started laughing and moving his chair towards his desk to cover his very prominent boner.

You were all silent. Hoshi, Seokmin and Seungkwan looked horrified while Clara and Sunny were smirking behind them.

“Hey, what’s going on? Why is everyone just standing here?” Joshua asked as he walked by Jeonghan’s office and saw the crowd.

He looked into the office and immediately realized you two had been caught red-handed.

“Oh… You should really lock your doors, guys” he said as he laughed and Jeonghan laughed with him. You affectionately slapped his shoulder for him to stop.

“I need to go wash my eyes” Hoshi said but didn’t move.

“I knew it! I mean I didn’t know it but very nice, Y/N. We have to talk” Clara added and Sunny laughed and nodded.

You rolled your eyes and smiled.

“This isn’t how I wanted you to find out. We were actually going to tell you about it today” you said.

“Before or after you defiled his office?” Seokmin asked you and everyone laughed.

“Definitely after” Jeonghan answered and you were ready to kick his ass.

“Come on, let’s get back to work. We can talk about it later” you said and started to leave. You gestured at your team to follow you.

“Oh we’re talking now, screw work” Sunny said and everyone agreed.

“This is why I didn’t tell you sooner” you added and they all laughed.

You told them the truth about everything with you and Jeonghan. Except what Clara and Sunny wanted to know. That, you didn’t say shit about. They were not happy about it.

Nothing changed from then on out. Everyone knew but it didn’t change any dynamic. Just some added jokes about you two angry fucking each other after your usual disagreements at interdepartmental meetings.

You also informed HR about your relationship and followed all the right steps. Soon enough, everyone at the office knew. Most people were surprised but nice about it. There were a few that were angry and doing their best to ruin your relationship either by creating rumors or trying to get in between you two. Hana and Jackson. Jackson was being an asshole but he wasn’t pushing anyones boundaries or creating issues. Hana on the other hand, was trying her best to ruin this for you two.

She started rumors about him still fucking her. She constantly tried to touch him and follow him around. It was frustrating but all you could do was report her to HR and move on. It had only been a few days but she was working hard trying to break you two up. It didn’t matter. You trusted Jeonghan and he always stopped her and her rumors whenever he heard them. You two agreed she would eventually stop. This was still fresh to everyone and she needed to get it out of her system.

You and Jeonghan were really good now and nothing she could do would change that.

Friday came fast and you were excited. This quarter was a rollercoaster but you were happy to be back here at this branch with the people you loved, in your home that you loved so much as well.

Jeonghan joined you and Clara in the Uber and you met up with everyone there.

You sat at the same table you had last time, with the same people, but so much has changed.

This time around, you were in love with the one you claimed to hate before. You were here with him and you were going to enjoy this completely.

Everyone was drinking and having fun. Dinner and the awards started and it was just as fun as you remembered. You had gone to a few end of quarter parties at the other branch and you never had this much fun. This was the best. This was where you belonged. With these people. With this team. With him. You were so happy right now, words couldn’t begin to explain it.

The awards had just ended and they were getting ready for the DJ set to start and you decided to get a refill on your drink.

When you came back to the table, Jeonghan wasn’t there. You checked your phone just in case and he had texted you.

“Join me. You know where”

You smiled and got up to go meet Jeonghan in the room you first started this whole thing in.

You walked in and locked the door behind you.

Jeonghan was sitting on the sofa by the window that you sat on last time. He was in the dark again, just like last time.

You walked towards him and sat down on the opposite end of the sofa, looking out the window.

He looked at you and you smiled still staring at the window.

“Getting sentimental, baby?” you asked, still looking out the window.

“Hopeless romantic. Remember, angel?” he asked and you laughed.

You looked at him and you stayed there looking at each other silently for a while until he sat up.

“Come closer, angel. You’re too far away from me”

You moved closer to him. As close as you could. He pushed your hair behind your ear and kissed you. Softly. Like he was scared you were going to break. This felt different. He was trying to show you in actions how he felt about you. You kissed him back and held his free hand in yours.

He started to deepen the kiss and you let him.

You moved to lay down and pulled him with you.

He was on top of you kissing you and you locked your legs around his waist.

You were already wet and he was hard. It had been too long since you had been together like this. You were being desperate for him and you knew he felt the same.

You reached down and started stroking his cock through his clothes and he whined.

“Don’t play with me, angel” he told you as he stopped kissing you.

You continued to stroke him through his clothes and he was panting and moaning into your mouth. You bit your lip. He was so sexy. You were losing your mind.

He pulled your hand away from his cock and pushed your dress up your body.

Jeonghan took your panties off and put them in his jacket pocket. From his other jacked pocket, he took out a condom and threw his jacket on the floor.

He moved down and kissed your thighs and your mound. Close to where you wanted him but not quite there. After a while of this, he started to leave bruises on your thighs. Fuck, you were wetter and wetter.

“I can see you clenching around nothing, angel. Are you that desperate for me?”

“Yes… Hannie, please… No more waiting…” you told him breathlessly.

“Fuck…”

He got up from the sofa and took his pants and underwear off. He moved back to the sofa and started fingering you slowly. He kept kissing your neck and all you did was moan and run your hands through his hair. He started scissoring his fingers inside you. He was impatient and you both knew it had been a while. He wanted to be inside you now and he needed to make sure he wasn’t going to hurt you.

“I love you” you moaned.

He stopped kissing your neck and kissed your lips deeply again. More forceful this time around.

He pulled away.

“I love you too, Y/N”

He put the condom on and started to tease your hole with his cock.

You whined.

“I don’t want to hurt you, angel. It’s been a while. Let me know if it’s too much, yeah?”

“Just get inside me, please… You’re driving me crazy, Hannie”

“Will you be a good angel for me then?”

“Always” you moaned and he pushed the head of his cock inside of you.

He was going slow. Rubbing circles on your clit, kissing you and with every stroke he pushed more of his cock inside you.

You started getting louder as he got deeper inside you.

“Not gonna gag me this time?” you asked and he laughed.

He moved closer to your lips.

“Let them hear it” he whispered and you both laughed together.

You pulled him down for a kiss and he pushed his cock all the way in until he bottomed out. You were moaning together against each other's lips.

After a few seconds, he started his pace.

Short, deep strokes, hitting the right spot. He knew your body so well. He still remembered exactly what to do to drive you crazy.

You were both loud. Moaning and panting. Not giving a shit about anyone outside of that room.

He grabbed one of your hands and interlaced it with his.

He kept fucking you hard and whispering how much he loved you. You whispered and moaned it back to him.

You were both close and you knew it.

He increased the pace of his fingers on your clit and increased the pace of his strokes as well.

You started squeezing his cock and you could feel yourself closer and closer.

Jeonghan squeezed your hand and moved to whisper in your ear.

He told you he loved you but when he said he would never let you go again, it pushed you over the edge and you came. Hard. It felt different this time. More tangible. Stronger.

When you came down from your high, his strokes were slower and he was looking in your eyes.

You pulled him in to lay on top of you and held him impossibly close.

Much like he did to you, you whispered in his ear and told him how much you loved him. That you wanted to be in his arms forever. And he emptied himself into the condom with a moan of your name.

This time around you laid there together. Just holding each other.

There was no rush. No weirdness. Just two people that loved each other and had finally found their way back to each other.

You didn’t know what was going to happen in the future.

You knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Nothing ever is with Jeonghan. But it certainly is worth it.

As you lay there with him you start thinking about the day you left.

About how you thought you were both just passing through each other's lives.

At that time it seemed that way.

He was just a boy creating chaos in your life for a while and you were just a girl that left and used your career as an excuse.

Now you know how wrong you were. How sad and miserable your life would have been without him in it. Without him with you. Just like this. Every day.

You know that from now on, you weren’t just another person passing through each other’s lives. You were everything in each other’s lives. You were both where you belonged.

With each other. Always together, and never to be apart again.

IT’S FINALLY HERE AND IT’S A MONSTER AGAIN Another rollercoaster of emotions 😭 I hope you love this as much as I loved writing it 💕 As usual, please let me know in the comments and such if you enjoyed reading it <3 Thank you for supporting me! Happy holidays! 🎆 CHEERS 🥂

Taglist (if you requested specifically): @woofie-nctzen-fanarts, @lovrchl, @lockburn-castle, @luchiet, @deeznutzaintnutting, @cheesytangerine, @avocifera, @odetoyeonjun, @listxn, @gyubbgist, @cvpidxo, @leicy0756, @sunflowergyeomie, @whore4stucky9104, @bangtanskz, @cecefarm, @staurdvst, @haahydvhkmhhn, @tsukkisdoll, @miniseokminnies, @namjinsworld

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f1goat · 7 months

Text

more than friends + lando norris x part five

In which your best friend wants to help you so you get more sexual experience, but he discovers quickly that he never wants to share you and your new sexual experience with others.

masterlist - playlist

warnings: smut with a plot or a plot with smut? :) minors dni! i never proofread so probably grammar or spelling errors

requested: yes, based on: something with a driver sister that’s still a virgin & lando (her bestfriend) suggests to teach her things (ofc pretending for it to bot mean anything), while he’s actually in love with her

part one / part two / part three / part four

You can’t help yourself and stare at Lando, just like a lot of others are doing right now. He’s absolutely glowing and taking in the attention he’s getting. After his deleted lap time from yesterday, he came back stronger then ever. Right now he’s standing on the podium claiming his well deserved trophy for the second place in the race. You smile while staring at him. Podiums look good on him. Insanely good.

“You did so good!” You almost scream when Lando comes to you later day afternoon. He’s still glowing from his podium. You can smell the faint odor from the champagne. You wonder about kissing Lando, will you taste it then? Lando doesn’t talk at first, he just hugs you. You continue to praise him in the mean time.

“You know what this means, right baby?” Lando eventually whispers into your ear. You think back at his words from yesterday. Is he serious? “I want you to get into my drivers room, so I can get my celebration right after debriefing,” Lando tells you.

You feel your cheeks heating up and reddening. Fuck.

“Can you wait there for me babygirl?” Lando asks you. You can only nod as response, if you even knew what to say right now you’re sure the words would get lost on your tongue. Lando makes things even worse by pressing a kiss against your forehead. You wish you could feel his lips on yours right now, but you’re fully aware of all the cameras around you. Tomorrow - or maybe this afternoon already - you will see this fragment of your life all over your socials.

Lando walks away from you. You know what to do now. Lando was clear about his wishes, and who are you to deny them from him? Without giving it a second thought, you walk towards the McLaren motorhome. It’s not hard to get into Lando his drivers room, probably because everyone around you knows who you are. Instead of talking to the mechanics who are still here instead of getting ready to party, you walk directly towards Lando his drivers room. They let you.

In Lando his drivers room you suddenly start to feel a bit nervous. What does Lando expect from you? He made his wishes clear yesterday and today. Apparently he wants to eat you out? The thought alone makes you feel more nervous. Although you have no idea why. Lando is probably pretty good at it, so it will be more of a celebration for you then him. Right? Maybe it’s the thought of Lando coming this close to your private parts. What if they don’t look good enough? You try to shake off those thoughts.

You know that a debrief can cost some time, so you try to kill the time by scrolling on your socials. You like every post about Lando his podium. When you see a notification from Lando popping up on your screen, you almost drop your phone on the floor. Is he serious?

Lando: 5 minutes babe

Lando: maybe you can already lose some clothes ;)

The thought of waiting for Lando while being in your lingerie only - or maybe even naked, makes you feel all kind of things. Your stomach is tightening by only the thought already. You don’t even realize that you’re already kicking of your sneakers. It feels like everything is happening on some sort of automatic pilot. You don’t even think about the possibility of other people walking in to this room. Even though the possibility is kinda high. You don’t care about things like that right now. In no time is the floor covered in the clothes you were wearing earlier. The only thing left on your body is your lingerie. It’s a black set, nothing to exciting, but it does look nice. You doubt a bit if you want to keep it on or off. Eventually you decide to take it off as well.

Thank god for the warm weather today, because you’re already shivering from only the thought that Lando can come in any second. It feels weird to wait here for him while being naked. You realize that Lando never saw you naked before. All the cons are weighting up, but you can’t stop thinking about Lando finding you like this. Will this be what he expected? Or will this be a surprise for him?

When the door opens you start to feel extremely aware of your surroundings and your own bareness. You’re relieved when you see that Lando is the one to open the door. He is quick to close the door when he sees you waiting for him. After that he’s even quicker to get towards you.

Lando can’t tear his eyes away from you. He realizes that he’s staring and that there’s a chance that it makes you feel uncomfortable right now. But he really can’t look away from you. He never saw you like this before. All the things that happened between the two of you before, happened with you in clothes. He can’t say he didn’t imagine about your body before, but in some way it’s even more beautiful then he already thought. He lets his gaze go over every small detail of your body.

He looks at your breasts and notices the way your nipples resemble small pebbles. He wants nothing more then to shower them in kisses right now. He wants to take your nipple into his mouth until he felt the hardness of it on his tongue, only to switch over to your other nipple after that. He lets his stare slide towards your most private part. You’re sitting with your legs crossed over each other, causing him to imagine the way your pussy will look.

It can’t be right that you’re without a doubt the girl who has the most impact on him. Seeing you like this has made him rock hard in only seconds. His dick is throbbing painfully. He remembers himself that this is about you - and not about him. You’re the most beautiful girl he has ever seen, with and without clothes.

You feel uncomfortable when Lando doesn’t say anything. Was it a mistake to undress this far already? When you start to think about questioning him about it, Lando lets out a soft sound. You look at him. Lando is still taking in your body. You notice that he’s looking at you full with adoration, or are you making that up?

Lando comes closer and closer to you. When he’s finally close enough, he eagerly puts his mouth onto your lips. He gives you a soft peck on the lips before moving the two of you towards the couch in the drivers room. Lando pulls you onto his lap, instead of normally this time he makes sure you face him. He doesn’t want your body to get out of his sight right now.

He presses a kiss against your neck. “Fucking hell babygirl,” he finally mutters. Then he presses another kiss against your body, this time it’s to your collarbone. “I didn’t expect to walk into you being naked already,” Lando continues to say to you, “Such a beautiful surprise,” he adds before pressing his lips against your body again. He presses multiple kisses against your body, at first closely to your collarbone again but after a bit he moves his lips down. He’s getting close to your breasts.

You’re already trembling under Lando his touch. Lando grunts. “Can I touch you babygirl?” He asks you. You’re quick to tell him yes. Lando takes on of your breasts into his hand, he kneads it while looking at you.

“You’re such a good girl,” he tells you.

Your stomach tightens. You feel your cheeks reddening. Why are those small words doing so much to you? You’re glad that Lando isn’t paying attention to your face, because you’re sure that it’s reddish from blushing this much. Lando is busy paying attention to your breasts. He lowers his face to get closer to your tits. He is still kneading on of them. You almost jump up when you feel his lips against the other tit. He presses soft kisses against it, before sucking on the skin. You quietly follow Lando his movements with your eyes. It doesn’t take him long before pressing a kiss against your hardened nipple. After that he takes your nipple inside his mouth. Softly you feel him suck onto it.

When Lando pulls back, you let out a soft whimper. Lando switches his movements. He moves his hand away from your breast, to put it back onto the other one. He presses kisses against your tit that he was kneading earlier. Before you realize it, your other nipple is in his mouth.

It surprises you when you feel your pussy clenching. It amazes you that you even start to feel that you’re getting pretty wet. Lando his mouth is doing all kind of things to you, but you can’t complain about one tiny part of it.

Lando removes his lips and hand from your breasts again. This time he moves his hands downwards, he is quick to get close to your private parts. It annoys you when he doesn’t touch you where you need him, but keeps a bit above of the place. Suddenly without realizing it, you let out a soft whine.

“What’s wrong babygirl?” Lando asks you. You notice the small smirk on his face. It makes you realize that he’s doing this on purpose. What a tease. You can’t tell him that, every word that leaves your mouth is begging Lando to do something about the way you’re feeling.

“I need you,” you softly whimper.

Lando lets out a low groan. Fuck, what you just told him makes him even harder. That’s actually insane. He moves his hands away from your vagina even further. He softly lifts you up and puts you next to himself onto the couch. Only to get of the couch himself after that. He takes your legs into his hands. Slowly he spreads your legs for him.

You look at Lando. He doesn’t look back at you. All his attention is onto your slit. Before you can feel uncomfortable about it, Lando starts to shower you with compliments about it.

“Such a pretty pussy,” Lando tells you with a low voice. He lets his hand slide around it carefully. He makes sure that he isn’t already touching your clit or entrance, he focuses himself onto your lips. He enjoys teasing you a bit. This is his celebration after all, right? He looks at the frustrated emotions that you’re displaying on your face. He realizes that you really need him. Lando never wants you to need anyone else.

He softly spreads your lips a bit with his hands.

“So beautiful,” he continues to tell you.

This time he slides his finger through your slit. It surprises him how wet you’re already are. He coats his finger in your slick.

“So wet already,” he murmurs to you.

He presses a soft kiss against the inside of your thighs.

“Is that all for me babygirl?” He asks you.

“Yes,” you tell him eagerly.

“Who’s the one who made you this wet?” Lando continues to ask you. He needs to hear you say it. He needs to hear it that this is all because of him.

“You Lando,” you softly confess, “It’s all for you.”

Lando lets out a soft moan after hearing your words. He presses a few more kisses against your thighs. He moves a bit closer to your pussy, but makes sure that he isn’t coming closer then your lips. You let out a frustrated whine.

“I need more Lando,” you tell Lando a bit ashamed.

Lando presses a soft kiss against your clit this time. He’s quick to move away from it after making his move.

“More,” you whimper.

Lando grins. He softly slides his finger over your clit a couple times, but makes sure that it’s not enough. He presses more kisses against your inner thighs. Suddenly he starts to think about you begging him. The thought is making him even harder. He looks at you. How hot would it be if you ask him to lick you?

“What do you need baby?” Lando asks you.

He makes sure that his finger is laying dangerously close to your clit right now. Almost onto it, but still a bit too far away.

“You,” you whimper.

“No, no,” Lando tuts, “I asked you, what do you need? What do you want me to do babygirl?”

You stay silent for a bit. Lando moves his finger even closer to your clit. Softly he touches it. It makes you tremble under his touch. It’s unfair what he’s doing to you. It’s even more unfair how fast he can make you feel like this. For a few seconds you wonder if anyone else can make you ever feels like this, you highly doubt it.

“If you don’t tell me baby, I can’t make you feel any better,” Lando teases you.

“Fuck,” you groan, “Tease.”

“Just tell me babygirl,” Lando continues to tease you.

“I want you to, fuck,” you stutter, “I want you to lick me.”

Lando doesn’t reply verbally anymore. He presses a soft kiss against your clit before starting to do what you asked from him. Slowly he licks around your pussy. He makes sure to lick every tiny part of it, before coming back to your clit. He presses another kiss against it, before using soft licks onto it. He makes sure that he’s not going to fast, but also not to slow. He wants you to enjoy this as much as he’s enjoying it right now. He increases his pace a bit after hearing you letting out multiple moans.

In the mean time he slides his finger around your slit. He slowly brings it to your entrance, but doesn’t push it inside. Yet. Lando knows it’s teasing and maybe even a bit mean, but he needs to hear you beg even more for him right now. He has fallen in love with the desperate voice you used earlier with him. He wants to know that he’s the one who makes you feel like this and that you need him to come.

You buck your hips. Hopefully Lando gets the hint. You want his finger inside of you. Maybe even more then one now that you think of it. Lando doesn’t response to your movement. You open your eyes to look at him. To your surprise he’s already looking back at you. Before speaking up, you admire the way he looks between your legs.

He’s still making short licks onto your clitoris. Sometimes he switches and licks around your whole slit. But the things he’s doing to your clit right now, are the things that feel the best. Although, you can use a bit more.

“More,” you softly say.

“More?” Lando asks you. You let out a soft whimper when he removes his mouth from your pussy. He looks at you. His finger replaces the movements his tongue made earlier. It still feels good, but not as good as before.

“Please,” you beg Lando.

“Tell me what you want baby,” Lando states. He increases his pace with his finger. He likes looking at you while you look like this. You’re shaking underneath his touch. Moans are falling out your mouth like they’re your new language. Lando wishes he could save this memory so he could look back at it to see all the small details, again and again. His cock is throbbing even more painfully then before. He needs release as well.

“How longer you take, how longer you will miss my tongue onto your pussy,” Lando tells you. He hears a soft whine leaving your lips.

“I need your fingers,” you eventually confess.

“Ask me,” Lando tells you sternly. He can’t help himself. He has fallen in love with your pleads.

“Can you finger me?” You ask Lando softly with red cheeks, before Lando can say anything you add another word. “Please Lan?”

His boner almost explodes when hearing the soft please Lan coming from your lips. He doesn’t say anything anymore, he’s quick to move his lips back to your clit and to move his fingers to your entrance again. This time he licks your clit even faster. He hears moans coming from you. Is it bad that he’s getting addicted to that sound? He realizes that he wants to hear you like this forever. No one else should ever hear you like this he even thinks.

Lando pushes one of his fingers softly inside of you. He feels your walls clenching around his finger. Easily he pushes in and out of your pussy. It doesn’t take him long before using another finger. He starts to finger fuck you with two of his fingers. In the mean time he focusses on eating you out. He softly sucks onto you clit. It makes you almost scream.

“Lan,” you loudly moan when he sucks a bit harder onto your clit.

He doesn’t response verbally, he just keeps increasing his pace. Waiting for you to come. Your walls are starting to clench even more around his fingers. Lando feels how your clit is starting to throb inside his mouth. You feel your stomach tighten. Moans keep coming out of your mouth. You can’t stop yourself.

“I’m close,” you tell Lando. He reacts by sucking harder on your clit. He moves his fingers faster inside of you. He notices a soft spongy spot inside of you and gives it all his attention from now on. You let out a hard moan.

“Can I come?” You suddenly ask Lando.

He’s overwhelmed by your question. Fuck. It’s insane how it feels that you’re asking him for permission to come. In the mean time you have more trouble with holding back your orgasm. You feel waves of pleasure hitting over you.

“Lan?” You quickly ask.

Lando removes his lips from your clit for a couple seconds. No longer then necessary. “Of course babygirl,” he tells you before sucking harshly onto your clit again. He repeats his movements from earlier, but his eyes are focused on your face. He looks at the way you close your eyes when the first waves of your orgasm are washing over you. He notices the way your lips are partly open, only to let out a couple of soft moans. When you press your legs closer together, Lando stops his movements and pulls back. He doesn’t want to overstimulate you. At least, not today. It would be a nice thing to do in the future.

Lando waits for you to say something. In the mean time he sucks your slit of his own fingers. He takes place next to you on the couch. You quickly lay down against him.

“Fuck,” you mutter, “that was really good.”

“Glad that you liked it,” Lando replies with a small grin. His cock is still throbbing inside of his racesuit. “You tasted better then that champagne,” Lando tells you. You let out a laugh. Without thinking about it you press a kiss against Lando his lips, he is quick to turn it into more. When his tongue slides into your mouth, you taste the faint taste of yourself on his tongue.

“Do you want me to do something for you as well?” You ask Lando softly.

“I wished,” Lando grunts, “but we have a dinner and a party to get ready for.”

“Maybe later tonight?” You suggest.

“I like the way you’re thinking babygirl,” Lando replies to you.

“I just want to feel your lips on my clit again,” you confess laughingly.

“Next time I won’t stop after your orgasm.”

“You think I can come more then once?” You ask surprised.

“You can add a lesson about overstimulation to the teaching plan babe,” Lando tells you jokingly, but none of his words are a joke. He wants to spend a whole evening between your legs and pull everything orgasm out of you that you have.

part six

this is my favorite part so far :)) hope everyone liked it!

taglist: @booksandplushies @dinodumbass @formula1mount @words-are-cheap @allywthsr @inejghafawifesblog @chonkybonky @formulas-bitch @harrysdimple05 @vildetry06 @wherethefuckisthething @nonameishere @lauralarsen@meadhbhcavanagh @obliviatevamps @shy4turcs @fix5idiots @nightlockcornucopia @marialovesf1 @kapsylia @im-an-overthinker @jule239 @lanando4 @lauralarsen @leclercdream @agentadhd @rewmuslupin @allsouls-emma @iamshiningeuw @teenagedreams-cl@kiskso @loxbbg @vellicora @thomaslefteyebrow @avg-golden-retriever @amorydsmt @killjoynotes @barelytolerabled @starmanv @changetyre @kami10471633 @2bormaybenot @httpmrklee @buendiabebeta @aliceespector

#lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando norris x y/n #lando norris fanfiction #lando norris imagine #ln4 #formula one #f1 #lando norris imagines #lando norris smut

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trashytoastboi · 2 months

Note

Hello! Can I request headcanons of Cracker, Katakuri, Usopp, Marco with S/O waking up finding a bug in their bed? This happened with me and my BF and we were freaking out haha

Hi hi! Of course~ Honestly bugs and beds... nope. Don't want any strange bedfellows thank you very much. Sorry for the long wait and hope you enjoy ~

Headcanons: Cracker, Katakuri, Usopp, Marco x S/O – Waking up and finding a bug in their bed

> Gender neutral

Charlotte Cracker

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🍪 Cracker took a long time, detailing his day and laughing at the idiots at World Government, he walked right past the marines and they didn’t even know it’s him. To further his little taunt he stood RIGHT beside his own wanted poster and those idiots never even picked it up. Cracker did this often and boasted of his tales before bed, to his partner who always willingly listened. He enjoyed the attention, how attentively {Name} listened. “Well enough about me-” he cut his own story short upon seeing how sleepy {Name} was.

🍪 He crawled into the obnoxiously large bed, right besides {Name}, doing his usual routine. Surprisingly when he wasn’t boasting about his own achievements, or speaking enthusiastically about his family he could be quite affectionate towards his partner. Maybe it was his pride as a lover, or something of the sort but he had a strange softness to his biscuit coated heart when it came to {Name}. He pulled them closer, pressing a soft kiss to their shoulder. He felt a tickling on his thigh, he chuckled thinking it was {Name’s} hand. Until he realized that unlike him, {Name} wasn’t exactly tall enough, with long enough limbs to reach his thigh the way they were laying. So what was tickling his thigh?

🍪 Cracker decided to ignore it. Surely it was nothing. The prickly, tickling sensation kept moving. Squirming, he could not ignore it. It stopped for a moment and {Name} shrieked at the sudden feeling and practically launched themselves from the bed, entrusting Cracker to find the culprit. He scoffed at seeing their terror, when he lifted the blanket. A monstrosity, some hundred legged demon wriggled and wreathed all over the bed. It set its sights for Cracker and aggressively squiggles towards him, Cracker would tell everyone it was his partner who shrieked high enough to crack glass, but it was him. He discovered he'd rather face an admiral instead of a centipede.

🍪Cracker unleashed the full force of his devil fruit, making sure there was no possible way for this foul creature to survive. Sure {Name} was scared and grossed out but the extent Cracker went to seemed like overkill. Even after all of that, practically decimating his entire room…He noticed it again. Nonchalantly marching along as if nothing ever happened, the centipede was alive and well, its presence tormented Cracker. Eventually {Name} worked up the courage to approach it, trap it in a container and toss it out the window while it sailed on the wind until probably landing safely somewhere to strike fear to everyone else.

🍪 Cracker was exhausted. He refused to go to sleep in his room, not until enough time has passed and he was double- no triple sure that it was clean and free of insects..He felt itchy and thought about how long the centipede tickled against him. One thing he can say for certain is he now knows that he has a fear of centipedes. Well any creature with more than four legs already raises his danger bells, this was just the epitome of it. What’s worse, it was a giant centipede! It’s unnatural how it could even get that big.

Charlotte Katakuri

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🍩 Katakuri is very soft, and finds he really enjoys the nights when he can sleep next to his partner. Their presence is so warm and comforting, evoking the same kind of fluffy and comforting feelings as his tea time. Katakuri rarely expressed this but you could easily tell, he acted noticeably softer and more gentle during these times when his heart felt at ease. With one of the most comfortable beds to ever be created and his partner, what more could he need for a restful night. He had prepared a small plate of snacks, something light to go with a late night beverage, he relaxed with {Name} sharing snacks and talking about the day.

🍩 After that Katakuri so naturally snuggled against {Name} well seeing that he is as tall as he is, {Name} was designated the role of little spoon every time. Once they tried to be the big spoon but they made Katakuri burst out in laughter. Everything seemed peaceful, although it was warm so Katakuri opened a window in the hopes of a pleasant breeze to come drifting through. Although the breeze was not the only thing that came drifting into the room.

🍩 Maybe the slightest hum of wings was not enough to alert them. Not even when it got louder, and closer. Until Katakuri felt something tap against his cheek. He thought nothing of it, until it moved. He casually brushed it off and it fell to the bed and made its way towards {Name}, the slightest tickle of an antenna gave them an itch. Although they didn’t expect to feel something when they went to scratch what was tickling them. They went to have a look, maybe they left something on the bed earlier? They spotted some odd creature. A scorpion? The silhouette seemed to match, but they had never heard of a scorpion that had an antenna? It started flying and {Name} shrieked to high heaven - Not a scorpion.

🍩 Katakuri could see {Name} panicking, being chased by some very tiny thing that had them running for their life. So nonchalantly asked them what the problem was. In their panic Katakuri heard {Name} complaining about ‘it’ crawling into their ears and tickling their brains. The idea actually sounded quite disgusting even by his standards. He easily captured it in a mochi cage and threw it outside to ease his partner’s concerns. Katakuri didn’t even see it for that long but the sheer terror that it evoked in his partner was strange. {Name} described in great detail about earwigs and all the horrific old wives tales that exist about them.

🍩 After hearing the tale about how they’ll crawl into your ears and lay eggs Katakuri started sleeping with earbuds in to prevent such. He brushed it off saying that he’s not affected but {Name} knew otherwise, plus Katakuri no longer opens the windows. So there’s something to suggest that maybe he’s not as unaffected as he makes himself out to be.

Usopp

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🏹 Ussop said goodnight to all of his lovely little plants, making sure everything was ready for tomorrow and he kept telling {Name} that he’d be there in a few minutes. In the meantime, {Name} prepped the bed making sure it was all comfortable and ready to turn in for the night. They knew Usopp could get stuck with his plants for hours, talking to them, tending to them and deciding they’d turn in before him. They got comfy and were in a half asleep state.

🏹 They’d just managed to lightly fall asleep, they felt the weight shift and the bed dip when Ussop climbed inside. He was talking to himself about the to-do list for tomorrow to remind himself of everything he wanted to attend to. He climbed under the blanket humming to {Name} with some random lullaby. {Name} shifted closer out of habit and all was well until something very evidently came crawling on the bed. {Name} could faintly make out the silhouette of the thing coming closer, closer, - it wasn’t big enough to have significant weight but they could see the blanket move underneath it so clearly it was big enough to do that. They silently watched as it got closer before being unable to take it anymore.

🏹 {Name} didn’t know what it was but they flailed, and flung themselves all over the bed to get away from it. Usopp obviously woke up from all the panicking wondering what had his partner so riled up and perturbed. When Usopp lifted the blanket to catch the culprit it revealed a spider. Eight legs, walking along like nothing could go wrong. Usopp chuckled and scooped the spider onto his hand “Don’t worry this little guy won't hurt you.” He reassures {Name} while admiring how pretty the little fellow looked. {Name} was terrified, reassured and surprised to see Usopp so unphased while he let the spider run around his hand and arm.

🏹 Usopp moved the spider to a container and he took it outside, while {Name} just remained inside, confused and too scared to look in the bed. Maybe they should just sleep elsewhere; they wracked their brain until they heard Usopp return. He fixed the bed and invited them to lay beside him. {Name} asked if there were any more bugs, evidently afraid to return. Usopp reassured them that it was just that little guy. {Name} told Usopp just how surprised they were to see him handling that with no issue ever, he’s never found bugs scary and rather on the cute side.

🏹 {Name} was too scared on their side of the bed and scooted closer and closer until they were practically sleeping on top of Usopp. Not that he minded all that much, he thought them being afraid of a little spider was adorable. They protested that they’re cute until they bite, Usopp couldn't really argue with that but explained he’s never been bitten.

Marco

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🍍 Marco quite enjoyed his midday naps, granted if everything was quiet enough to permiss that. He even roped {Name} into joining him and it almost became routine when they would disappear for an hour or two to just rest and recharge before getting back to the grind. He didn’t even bother opening the bed and threw a soft blanket on top instead, without checking it. Had he checked things might have been different for the two of them. He plopped down and awaited {Name} wondering why they were so late.

🍍 {Name} arrived to find a very half asleep Marco who greeted them with a sleepy tune and an interrupting yawn. They walked over and plopped over, smiling as they saw Marco’s resting face. The moment felt so serene and peaceful, warm and comfortable. {Name} wished it would last forever until they felt some hard, cold thing MOVING next to them. A slight hissing sound arose and they froze, a snake is easy no big deal. But this didn’t feel like a snake. It was smaller, still sizable and more rigid.

🍍 “Marco-” {Name} called softly, trying not to move, “Marco!” They called a little louder, before reaching up and shaking him. Marco woke up, flustered “What’s wrong? Enemies? Marines?” he searched around, when {Name} shuffled closer to him “There’s something behind me…Take it away please” Marco was confused but noticed the genuine fear that lingered in their expression. He came closer and reached behind them, to feel something. For a moment relief washed over him, it was probably a random item. He thought that until it moved in his hand and Marco threw whatever he was holding across the room with a muffled shriek.

🍍 Marco and {Name} skedaddled to the polar opposite side of the room and looked for any sign of movement and there it was. Red, brown and black amalgamated onto a palm sized insect. An intimidating and shrill hiss escaped the creature, Marco did the only rational thing. He took {Name} and left the room before burning it, the flames would leave nothing behind. After watching everything turning into ash, Marco seemed relieved. Until he saw something JUMPING at him through the ashes.

🍍 They shut the door and Marco called for someone who was better at dealing with such things than he was. To his surprise it was easy to find someone…Enthusiastic about bugs amongst the eccentric crew. They were excited while ‘admiring’ the fine specimen which they identified as a parktown prawn. Marco didn’t care what kind of creature it was but more to the fact that his whole room had been overturned by its existence.

#one piece #trashytoastboi #charlotte cracker #katakuri #usopp #marco the phoenix #fluff #sfw #one piece imagines #one piece headcanons #gender neutral reader #gender neutral pronouns #one piece headcanon #cracker x reader #katakuri x reader #one piece usopp #usopp x reader #marco x reader

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notafunkiller · 10 months

Text

sweet nothing

Summary: Bucky and you attend an awards show, but an interviewer makes sure to ruin your night before it even starts. The loss of your project makes you have a breakdown when you get home, and Bucky does his best to comfort you.

Pairing: director!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader

Warnings: 18+, age gap (r is 24, Bucky is 36), teasing, dirty talk, language, pet names, fingering, oral sex (the reader receiving), clit play, come eating, a little metal arm kink, daddy kink, no condom (but they are both clean and the reader is on birth control), no mention of y/n

Word Count: 4.2K

story masterlist

Bucky Barnes masterlist

A/N: Bucky’s look is obviously inspired by Sebastian’s appearance at D23 Expo in 2022. Also, this happens a few months after the second part, in October.

An extra thank you to @marvelouslizzie and @lavenderhaze967 for being my beta readers and for the endless support.

Please, do not repost or translate without my permission!

You really can’t decide what to say. The remark came so unexpectedly, you were taken aback.

You don’t know how they knew about your vacation. The photos and some false info were spread all over the internet, and you found out only after you came back home.

You expected things to calm down from July until now, though, but they didn’t. They actually became worse and worse. But despite that, you didn’t even think you were going to get this type of comment tonight, especially since you announced you refuse to talk about your personal life. You should have known better… Bucky was right, you can never trust the press and you should never have expectations.

“Even though this has nothing to do with tonight and I said I won’t talk about anything related to my personal life multiple times...”

“I wasn’t-” The interviewer tries to interrupt you, surprised by your cold tone, but you don’t let her. If they want to speculate, then at least you can let it out now. They can do whatever they want after.

“To make things clear, Mr. Barnes is actually one of the most professional people I’ve ever worked with… one of the best: kind and supportive, and he always gives the best feedback.”

“Miss-”

You ignore her once again, raising your hand to stop her. “He is blunt, honest, and hasn’t been anything but professional the whole time. He made a massive contribution to the film industry and he’s been in the public eye for so long... If you had done your research, you’d have known how everyone, especially the women he worked with, talked and talk about him.” You take a deep breath, trying to keep your composure before you look straight at the camera. “Also, no, I did not sleep with him or anyone else to get any kind of role. Thank you!”

You don’t realize how much you’re shaking or how many tears you were holding back until you reach the bathroom. You’re thankful Bucky is inside already. He doesn’t deserve this shitty attitude, and you know he would have made a scene and stopped this on the spot if he’d witnessed it.

So you don’t tell Bucky about it, not wanting to give him bad vibes, especially since you know how he already feels about going to events in general. Your table is full when you get there: a part of the cast and the crew along with Bucky’s manager. Natasha couldn’t come this time, but you know everyone, so it’s better than you expected.

“Wine?” Bucky asks you softly, leaning in so only you can hear him.

“Later, please. I have a small headache.”

“Oh, no, baby.” He kisses your forehead as soon as you finish talking. “Do you need a pill?”

You love how he never hides or tries to keep his distance when you go out together. Maybe it’s nothing much after all, but you know how discreet he is, how much he values privacy, and it makes you truly feel a part of his life.

“Don’t worry, it will go away.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, yes.” You brush it off with a smile, and he nods, unsure, getting back in his chair properly.

You can’t let your emotions eat you alive, anger or nervousness... you just can’t. But it’s easier said than done because time passes so slowly until your categories are announced. Not even joking around with Bucky’s manager helps. She has such amazing vibes usually, but you are too deep in your thoughts to fully embrace them.

By the time the nominees in your category are announced, Bucky gets you all ice cream, making sure they put two spoons for you: one with chocolate and another with biscuits. It’s so delicious, but you instantly stop eating when the small video with a few of your scenes is projected. People around you clap loudly, but you can’t look around much, your cheeks so flushed when the camera stops on you again. Bucky even whistles using the index and middle fingers of his flash hand, which makes you giggle. He’s so cute!

“And the winner for Best Actress in a Drama is...”

It’s like the world stops for a second: the tension, the lack of air, the ringing in your ear... you can’t hear anything. But you can read body language and see everyone’s shoulders falling. You don’t dare to look at Bucky, only smiling in joy for whoever won and trying to hold back tears. Every woman on that list deserves it. They are all fantastic. You aren’t upset because someone else won. You just feel like a failure because you lost. It’s like you disappointed the people who care about you, who took a shot with you. Bucky... who saw something in you and risked it. You know how silly it is because he isn’t the type of person who would even think that, but you can’t just control the train of thoughts that keeps overwhelming you.

“I’m so sorry, baby.”

You still can’t look at your sweet, comforting Bucky. Fuck, such a crybaby... You just nod and take your spoon with your right hand so you can have more ice cream.

He better wins!

The movie loses shortly after you, and it’s your turn to comfort him. You don’t pay attention to the camera focusing on you or Lucas tapping on his arm in a consolation gesture when you turn your face toward him and kiss his cheek. “I’m sorry, bubba.”

He melts instantly under your touch. “Don’t be.”

But how can you not be? It makes your insides burn. This man you know so well professionally and personally deserves every fucking award this industry has. He is fantastic! The movie was fantastic, too.

The urge to cry takes over you the moment the winner of the best director category is announced, but it’s not Bucky. And you think he senses it because he squeezes your thigh gently to assure you. You…

You cannot believe this.

You have a bitter taste in your mouth for the rest of the night there, which is short since Bucky suggests leaving earlier. You hate awards ceremonies officially, too.

The car ride is no better. You find it harder and harder to hold back your tears, and the last thing you want is Bucky to see. He asked you if you were hungry, and asked you to stay over at his place. How could you say no? No, Bucky, I want to go home and cry angry and disappointed. You spend most of your nights at his house anyway, so it would make him worry. Especially since the distance to your apartment is longer.

You let a deep breath out when he closes the door, turning on the lights as you start to take off your shoes.

“Home sweet home.” He gives you a tired smile.

“Ihm. Finally.” You don’t trust your voice to say more than that and you let your bag and phone on the small table before going straight to the kitchen.

“Next time we’re invited, we ditch to watch a movie or something and make love.”

His words are enough to send you over the edge somehow. When you hear his footsteps closer, you instantly turn around to face the sink, grabbing the kitchen counter in an attempt to hold back the tears. But it’s so hard…

“Baby?”

Fuck, he’s so close.

“Bubba?”

And that’s all you need to burst into tears. But you’re not just crying, you are fully sobbing when you feel his arms wrapping around you.

“Bubba, breathe, please.” He rests his head on your shoulder, and you feel so naked, so bare in a way... Something you feared for so long. You are vulnerable in a way you only let your family see you, not even them maybe. It’s like you’re giving him access to your inner child. And it’s terrifying.

“I-I’m ss-sorry.” You are gasping for air between words, and this makes you feel even worse. You sound so pathetic.

“What are you sorry for, bubba? Focus on breathing, please.” Bucky’s voice is so calm and soothing, you almost let yourself fall into his arms. You can’t believe this safe sensation you feel. It’s shocking to you. You trust him to hold you and comfort you even when you look this deplorable.

“In and out.” You breathe in and out every time he says the words and it slowly becomes easier; the air doesn’t feel like it burns your lungs anymore.

You feel his kisses on the back of your head. “Good girl, perfect. Just like that.”

You open your eyes as soon as your body stops trembling and turn to him instantly. You probably look like a wet raccoon, but you don’t care. You hug him so tight you wonder if he can even breathe. But you can’t let go.

Bucky’s glad he took off his jacket since the zipper would have hurt your face.

“I’m right here, not going anywhere.”

“I’m ss-sorry,” you say weakly, taking a step back. “It’s just so unfair!”

His whole face softens even more. He understands... your first nominee and your first loss. This is never easy, especially for someone ambitious and talented.

“I know it hurts, but I promise you more will come, and they will finally give you the awards you deserve. You were amazing.” He takes your hands into his and brings them to his mouth.

“It’s not about me!”

“What?”

“You deserved to win!” You can’t control the anger in your voice. “This movie, the whole concept, the team... Maybe it’s because of the way I-”

“Stop right there! You have nothing to blame yourself for. And you don’t have to feel bad for me, okay, bubba?” His mouth finds your forehead. “Of course, it bothers me a little, but these awards come and go. Sure, some bring more opportunities, but I don’t give a fuck about it. You were a fantastic lead. You are fantastic! But I promise you, you will get more awards because you deserve them. I was mad for you. Don’t worry about me, alright?”

“But you deserve it!”

“It’s just an award, baby. I am proud of this project and of everyone who was a part of it, especially you. It wasn’t easy and it was emotionally draining.”

He wipes your face, and you curse. You should have worn waterproof mascara.

“I just don’t...”

“Don’t ever blame yourself again.” He pauses. “Actually, you will because you can’t control that, it’s not a switch. What I mean is don’t try to hide from me, don’t let the thoughts overwhelm you before talking to me. Or someone... anyone: your sister, your mom, Natasha. I just want you to know I am here for you.” He kisses your lips shortly. “I got you, and you got me.”

He barely has time to finish his sentence before you grab his face and kiss him, your tongue immediately licking his bottom lip. It’s something about the way he reacted, about his permanent attitude and the way he looks that makes you dizzy. So dizzy that you easily switch from feeling anger and fear to sexual desire.

You keep kissing him until you two can’t breathe anymore. He’s so sweet, so good. You can’t help it...

“I want to suck your cock.”

He opens his eyes instantly.

“What?”

“Want to take you inside my mouth. Now.” You repeat with such urgency that his shock is increasing.

“Wait, you don’t have to-”

But his words die as your hands are already on his belt, taking it off in seconds. When it loudly hits the floor, you unzip the pants, dragging them down along with his boxers with force. So much force he gasps.

“Please, daddy.”

You drop to your knees in seconds, making sure to properly grab the base before leaning in to kiss his wet head.

“Jesus!”

He has to grab the kitchen counter behind you to stand still.

“Just me.” You smirk a little and take more of his cock inside your mouth. He’s getting harder little by little. When you start to move your hand , though? He finally gets in his usual horny mood, understanding you really want this.

“Fuck, look at you! On your knees just for me. So needy!”

You moan, bringing your left hand to his balls as you start to bob your head. You just want him to come.

“Baby, please. Fuck me!” He groans, and you suddenly feel your hair getting pulled hard as if he’s trying to get you away from his cock. You stop sucking just to snap:

“Why are you taking my cock from me?”

“Because it wants to be inside my pussy.”

You snort.

He helps you stand up and kisses you without any worry. You moan when you feel his hands on your breasts, then to your sides, and before you can even say anything, you hear the sound of the material ripping.

“Hurry up!” You complain, waiting for him to finish undressing you as you keep kissing his neck.

Your bra and underwear are next and you can’t believe how free you feel.

“You are so fucking beautiful!”

“Need you, please...”

He nods, immediately lifting you in his arms, and you don’t stop kissing him until your back hits the bed.

“How do you want me?” You ask, and he frowns.

“What do you mean?”

“Position, Bucky.” You try to clean your face with the back of your hand as you wait for his answer.

“We can start like this.” He gets between your legs and lifts them on his shoulders. His hair is messy, all over his forehead, and you giggle, brushing it away from his eyes.

You’re so wet he gets inside you in one movement, and you both moan. The fullness is so good, you arch your back. Sex with Bucky will never get boring, you are sure of it. He’s a perfect combination between caring, desperate, and curious.

“Bucky!”

“Yes, bubba, I’m here.” He kisses you as he starts to thrust. “I’m right here.”

Your legs are wrapped around his ass, pushing him inside you harder every time he pulls almost completely out.

“God, I love your cock so much!”

“Just that?” He pouts, making you laugh. He’s a baby and a daddy at the same time.

“I love you, bubba, you know that.”

“And I” thrust “want” thrust “to hear” thrust “it again and again.”

“Fuck.” You close your eyes, turning your face to the side without realizing.

“Eyes on me, doll. Eyes on daddy.”

“It’s hard...” you cry out, even more turned on by him calling himself your daddy. It fits him so much!

“Fine.” He uses his metal arm to turn you around on your tummy.

“Bucky!” You scream because of the sudden movement and the empty feeling since he pulled out.

“Hands and knees since you don’t want to look at me.”

You shake your head, amused, but you get in the position, raising your ass as much as you can. You love when he fucks you like this. Everything feels deeper, and there’s no distance despite the fact you can’t properly see him or kiss him. “So dramatic of you.”

You flinch without realizing when you feel his palm connecting with your ass cheeks.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, no.” You quickly assure him, looking up when you hear his worried tone. He never spanks you too hard, and the amount of strength he uses makes you enjoy it. It always makes you wet. “Just didn’t expect it.”

“Good.” He kisses your forehead. “Ready?”

“Hurry!”

He quickly gets inside you as soon as you finish speaking, and you gasp. It takes your breath away, but you can’t help but wiggle your ass. His hands grab your hips and he finally starts to literally pound you just the way you both enjoy it. His cold metal fingers feel so good.

“B-Bucky!”

“Do you love it, baby?” You hear him, but you don’t understand how he expects you to answer. You can’t even breathe properly.

“Ihm.”

“Fuck, you’re so wet around me. I love you so much.”

You try to tell him you love him back, but the words are so distorted you give up.

You’re close already.

“Are you gonna come for me? Are you gonna be a good girl and let go? Make daddy prouder?”

And just like that, you come. You don’t hear anything anymore: you can’t distinguish the words, only his voice. You feel so good, so light, that you don’t realize the wave of tears that hits you.

Bucky smiles, knowing these are from so much pleasure, and doesn’t continue to thrust much until he comes inside you. You moan again, encouraging him to fill you. To give you as much come as he has.

“Yes, yes. Please, need your come.” And you know he loses his mind every time you do that. “Please, daddy.”

A few seconds later, you feel him move his hands.

“Fuck me, baby, this was incredible.”

You nod, trying to find your words again.

“Yes, it... it was.” He helps you turn around after he gets out of you and groans.

“You look so fucking good! Perfect to eat right now.”

He makes you laugh before you slowly kiss him, moaning when your tongues find each other. There is something unique about the way he uses that mouth.

“I mean it. Gonna eat you now, ok?”

It’s the only warning you get before your head drops to the bed again and his is between your legs. His shoulders are broad enough to keep your legs extra spread, and you try to keep your eyes open just to enjoy the sight.

But it’s hard. His tongue on your clit then at your entrance, licking and eating his own come combined with yours makes you so weak you have to grab his hair to have a focus point other than his mouth.

“Jamesss.”

Your hips move uncontrolled toward his mouth as soon as you feel him slowing down. He tries to keep your back on the bed by pushing your tummy down with his metal arm, but it’s impossible. The coldness on your skin makes you cry even more.

“Fuck, fuck, Bucky, please...”

You can’t believe how close you are again, but his tongue is always great. You don’t remember a single time he didn’t make you come like this.

You gasp when he moves his tongue up to your clit quickly, which you did not expect. Even though you should have... you should have expected him to bring two metal fingers to your mouth and command you to suck them, then to push them inside you at once as he sucks on your clit. And sucks. And sucks. And when he takes it between his teeth, grazing it just enough, you come.

You don’t even realize you are screaming, the pleasure so overwhelming you can’t think even for a second. And he doesn’t stop, he keeps using his tongue and fingers until you have to beg him to.

You’re trembling, absolutely consumed when he moves up to kiss you.

“Fuck, we taste so good, doll.”

You kiss him again, making sure to lick his lips before he opens his mouth. You taste amazing together, indeed.

“Yes.”

“Good. Are you feeling better now?”

“I can’t feel my body,” you say before laughing.

“Are you sore?”

You touch his face. “I feel well fucked, daddy, don’t worry.”

His face is priceless every time you call him that. It’s funny how a big man like him gets red so easily. You never get over this.

“You and that… name.”

You pinch his chin immediately, stroking his hair. “As if you don’t enjoy it.”

“I do. Look what you did to me!” He shakes his head in a disapproving way, and you feel happy. He makes everything lighter... easier for you. He learned when and how to push you, and it helps that you have a similar sense of humor.

“I’m better now, thank you. It’s just so unfair because you are a wonderful director.”

“Just director?”

You giggle, seeing his pouty mouth. “And writer.”

“And?”

“And?” You raise your eyebrow.

“What else?”

“I don’t-” You burst into laughter when you feel his hands tickling you. “Stop! Stop! F-fine! Best... best boyfriend.”

“What? Didn’t hear you.”

You roll your eyes. He’s so predictable sometimes.

“B-best boyfriend in the world. Now stop! You’re so unfair!”

“Alright.” He gives you a boyish grin, which makes him look so young. His smile never changed from what you saw. His childhood pictures, his college ones... he kept it and it makes him so adorable.

“I love you, old man.”

“Not this again.” He fake puffs before kissing you. “I love you, too.”

You wake up with a few notifications and a message from Bucky telling you he’s gone to do some grocery shopping. You were wondering why the house was silent. Even when he wakes up earlier than you and tries to be silent, there is a low sound from the TV or his music player.

What you don’t expect is to have thousands of DMS and following requests as soon as you open your Instagram.

You don’t understand at first, still sleepy and hungry, until you scroll through your feed and see Bucky’s post. You almost drop your phone.

There are two photos. The first is only with you, but you don’t remember when he took it. You’re not looking at the camera, staring at the sunset, so it’s clear he took it without you knowing. He’s had this for months... and he never showed it to you. God, you miss Italy!

When you swipe to the next pic, one with both of you as he’s biting your cheek, you laugh. You were being so silly that day. Your fourth date... He was ready to eat your whole face and he didn’t want to take no for an answer, so you started to bite and suck his chin in return. It was the first time you spent the night at his house. It feels like years ago...

Then your eyes finally drop to the description and you start crying a little.

I already won the best award that exists a few months ago❤️ Thank you for your support!

You notice he turned off the comments, but many common friends liked the post.

Fuck, that means you are officially together everywhere. Wow.

You can’t believe what you woke up to. You two never kept your relationship a secret, but you preferred being discreet. You are aware of how this looks from the outside, both of you do, but does it matter? At the end of the day, the people you care about know the truth, you work hard to get jobs, and that’s enough.

You immediately open your gallery and choose a couple of photos with you and him, then just with him: hugging, Bucky kissing your cheek, him making dance moves, his face up close... some random pics you love.

You choose to use only a red heart as your caption at first, but before you publish, you add a few words because it doesn’t feel enough and even tag him on your boobs.

What a view: @jbuckybarnes #photosdump

Happily, you let the comments on and look for a certain short video you absolutely adore from your vacation: he has his head on your lap, napping soundlessly while you run your hand through his hair. His face might not be visible, but it’s clear it’s him. His shoulders, his moles, and his hair...

You remember how he groaned and whined every time you stopped touching his curls, bringing your hand back to his head.

“Bubba, more...”

Smiling, you tag him in a small font, choosing a color to fit the yacht floor, and post it.

The next fifteen minutes you spend in the bathroom, taking a shower, doing your routine, and changing into some clothes you left here the last time.

“Baby?” You jump when you hear Bucky in the bedroom all of a sudden, but you don’t let the shock hold you back from jumping on him.

He catches you, thankfully, and holds you by the ass as you kiss him all over his face and neck before stopping on his lips. Your tongue finds his and you moan in his mouth shortly after, making him groan, too.

“Good morning!”

“I love you,” you whisper, resting your head on his chest.

“I love you, too. Didn’t want to leave before you woke up, but we needed breakfast.”

“Can’t believe you did that.”

“What?” He asks genuinely confused.

“You know what!” You say, words muffled by the material of his T-shirt. You are surprised how this small normal thing made you so happy you can burst.

“Ah.” He realizes, leaning in a bit to kiss your hair. “I should have done it ages ago.”

You really hate how he tends to take the full blame when it’s not the case. “We then... but now it’s the perfect timing.”

“Yes, the perfect timing.” He carries you around until you are both back in bed.

The breakfast can wait, so can you to see his reaction when he finds your posts.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #celebrity!bucky barnes #director!bucky barnes #daddy!bucky barnes #sebastisn stsn #bucky barnes fluff #my fanfics #my stories #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #bucky barnes x reader smut

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fbs-fc-ur-mommy · 8 months

Text

Mature themes, use of drugs, shotgunning, intercourse, and mention of smoking and drinking.

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You went to your usual meting site, an abandoned house near the train tracks. Simon was waiting there, he texted you after you finished your school.

You were exited to meet him there, maybe he could share his cigarettes with you again or better some sweet alcohol.

As you arrived there you entered the house, seeing two figures not one, it was Simon and someone you didn't knew but looked familiar. The brunette looked awful to Sophie. His outfit was an black one with white lines and the text EA 45. The man looked at you then turned to Simon.

-I'll leave, call me anytime when you want you know.

-Alright old man. Simon said, playfully tapping the man shoulder.

After he left you asked who that was.

-Oh, Him? His name is David, he sells drugs, I wanted today you to try it out.

-Drugs? You asked with a little fear. Simon you know that it's almost night time, if my parents sees my high they -

-You can stay at my house today, I'm alone for a few days - he cut you off.

He grabbed you hand and guide you to the stairs where you two would've use them as chair. He lighted up the joint and smoked, inhaled it and then exhale it with an smirk. He gave it to you which you looked at him with fear.

-Hey, [Name ] if you don't wanna do it-

-It's not that Simon! I never did this before, I'm a little afraid...

Simon looked at you with sympathy, you, an person with good monthly income, good grades and respectful reputation. Someone like you shouldn't hang out with someone like him, yet you did it. He knew he will fuck you up, destroy you. Your parents always warned you about him. He always told himself to stop hanging with you. To stop before it's too late. He already fucked up by teaching you how to skip classes, steal, smoke and drink. Stop it before it's too late. He thought about it night and day. Yet your eyes begged him to not leave you, to teach you and maybe more fucked things.

An idea crossed his mind and shared it to you.

- You want to try - shotgunning? What's even that? Simon do you plan to kill me? You asked him sarcastically, but it was true that you didn't know what was shotgunning.

Simon blushed at the idea of explaining it, yet he got the courage to do.

-It's basically blowing smoke via the mouth into another person.

-You want us to that?

-I mean only if you're comfortable...

You thought about it, it's basically kising right? But maybe Simon was just nice to help you... There was always an small tension between you two but maybe it was all in your head. You nod and Simon smiled to you. He put his joint again to his chapped lips and dragged an much longer drag than usual. Damn you Simon, you want to put me in the fucking hospital don't you?

While you were thinking you gasped when Simon hand grabbed your chin, then he lowered himself to your soft lips. His cold touch making you shiver, his rough lips to your soft ones maked you go feral, hardly controlling yourself from actually kissing Simon for real.

The hot smoke blowed into your mouth and eventually into your lungs maked you immediately light headed, the burning sensation in your throat maked you tearing up tears. But overall it was an nice felling.

Simon looked down at you, smirking he then drag again from the joint, not giving you an change to adjust to the felling. His lips joining you again. His hand who rested to your chin, his thumb started caressing your cheek.

He pulled away admiring your flurstrated form. You looked like thinking, staring and making holes with your eyes into the floor beneath. Suddenly he felt an hand grabbing the back of his neck, soft lips chasing his rough one's.

You pulled away in fear when you realised what you did. He looked shocked. He didn't even kiss back. He only flinched back when you kissed him. That's it. He's gonna tell everyone that you sexual harrased him, your parents will hear about it and the worse - will kick you out.

-Simon, I'm so fucking sorry - you thought of an excuse, was this because of you being high?

-[Name]...

You feared the worst.

-I was only surprised...

Then two hands grabbed your face, lips crashing into each other, tongue already exploring each other mouth's.

You didn't knew when your bottom clothes disappeared, but the only thing you knew was your face being pushed into the wall in front of you, the brutal truths making your legs shake, your tears leaving an uncomfortable felling on the face, salty taste from the tears in your mouth.

-S-Simon please! Slow down! - you begged, over stimulation making you cry and cry.

Simon looked down where your bodies would meet , your ass cheeks being red from his hands abusing them, his palm print being so pretty there. He wanted more skin to feel so he brought you up, his chest to your back and your head resting back to his shoulder. He bought one of your leg up, the position making him enter more deeply. He stayed inside you an little, not wanting things to end too soon. His left hand grabbing your face to kiss you, which you thought it would be an affectionate gesture, which wasn't when Simon suddenly started fucking you again, more brutal than before, making you cry into his mouth, more tears wetting his face too.

He finally came inside with an grunt, your legs giving up, which he allowed both of you sliding down into your knees to take breaths. He was soo tired too that he didn't bother to pull out. Only breathing could be hear, Simon clothed body hugging you from behind, defending you from the cold night air. You wanted to say something when an train passed by, muffling any noise so you waited.

-Simon if this was only an one night stand please leave and never see me again if it wasn't stay with me.

Simon was shocked by what you've said but happy at the same time.

-[Name]... - he groaned like he was tired to talk too. What you want us to be?

-Simon, let's be lovers.

When Simon heard that he knew the he fucked up, fucked you up too. He knew that your relationship would be forbidden. He knew that someone will leave broken. He knew all. Yet he decided to risk it all and have you.

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Repost from my ao3 acc

#cry of fear #simon henriksson #cry of fear sophie #simon cry of fear #afraid of monsters #david leatherhoff #simon henriksson x reader #simon henriksson smut #smut #shotgunning #tw drugs #sex and drugs

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brownskinlemon · 5 months

Text

Deal (d.f.)

pairings: dom/reader

word count: 4,061

summary: You've never experienced the big O, and a night with your best friend Dominic turns into more than you planned

warnings: smutty smut, mentions of smoking, unprotected s3x, cr3ampie, multiple orgasms, some sappy emotions

authors note: this is my first ever story, and I hope you all enjoy :)

!! do not repurpose or repost as your own for any reason on any platform without credit !!

The shuffling of feet was all that could be heard as you and your best friend Dominic paced the grocery store aisles. It was nearly midnight, the store getting ready to close soon. The munchies had taken over earlier in the night, which led you two to an hour's journey around this store, baskets full of junk food in both your hands.

“Y/N…bro” You turned back to his mouth agape, eyes fixated on a mega-sized Ben n Jerry’s tin. He toyed with his lip between his teeth for a moment, before swinging the door open and obnoxiously tossing it into his already overflowing basket.

You snorted quietly to yourself, quickly turning back around before you ended up staring at his pink lips for far too long for your own comfort, far too long to be considered platonic admiration.

The streets of Naples were empty and dim, headlights dancing across you in the passenger seat of Dominic’s car as you sped down a main road. Your eyes were glued to the moonlight dancing across the thrashing waves across the shore out of your window.

“So beautiful” He mumbled to himself.

“ I know right?” You responded without looking at him. Your head whipped around to him, surprised to find his brown eyes already fixated on you, making your heart drop suddenly.

He coughed to himself, straightening up in his seat and turning his attention back to the road, his lips once again being caught in between his lips. Those perfect fucking lips.

With his looks he could easily have every girl in Naples on a leash, but chooses not to, you never understood why. You would like to think he had commitment issues, but it seemed to be pure disinterest in dating at all. You had been friends since middle school, and though you had been in so many friends and “relationships”, your friendship stayed the same. As close as you had been, there were lines you wouldn’t dare to cross. These lines became blurry in your mind as of late. His figure, eyes,lips, voice had all been so…enchanting recently. Staying up till late overthinking every little interaction was excruciating to say the least. You’d rather die than let him know a word of it.

You snuck glances at him as his ring-clad fingers drummed on the steering wheel to whatever song was currently on. His apartment came into view, and he skillfully maneuvered into the parking deck. After he parked, you hopped out, grabbing the 7 bags worth of snacks you had bought earlier.

“You really think we can actually eat all this?” You huffed as you made your way down the hall to his apartment.

“ I know I can, especially that ice cream.” He nodded, a small smirk pulling lightly on his face.

“Ok so out of all of them, who was the best in bed?” Dom quipped, eyes fixated on the rolling tray in front of him on the bed, hands skillfully pearling one of several blunts that night.

You were both clad in a hoodie and pajamas, sitting on his bed. A fiery orange light danced across the dim room from a lamp, “Who Hurt You?” by Daniel Caesar playing lightly in the background.

“Hm…maybe that one soccer guy. But he did the bare minimum and didn’t even make me cum.”

“Well at least you’re able to get yourself off right? Who needs em anyway.”

“Yeah…” you trailed off quietly, eyes locked on your fiddling hands which had now become the most interesting thing in the world. You could see him stop his actions out of your peripheral vision.

“Y/N”

“Dom”

“No way you’ve never…finished? Like ever in your 20 years?”

You sighed, eyes squeezing together. “I have not.”

Tears begin to burn at the brim of your eyes, threatening to fall with each second of embarrassing silence that follows. Sure you had discussed…sex,all bestfriends do, but there were lines you didn’t want to cross. Dom knowing about your lack of ability to orgasm was one of those lines.

Without looking up at him you jumped up, rushing past him to the bathroom across the hall, slamming the door behind you. You sighed deeply as you leaned on the counter, locking in on your eyes in your reflection that were reddened, caused partially by both the weed and your now falling tears. It didn’t help that weed always made everything you felt even more intense.

“Get it together. It’s not that serious.” You repeated like a mantra quietly until a heavy knock interrupted your thoughts.

“Y/N come out…I didn’t mean to make you cry.” You couldn’t see him but you knew he was doing that thing where he tapped his feet when he got nervous or worried.

You nibbled on your bottom lip, pausing in the silence.

“You didn’t- I mean- you didn’t Dom. Shit’s just embarrassing.”

“There’s no point in being embarrassed. Why would I care if you’re not like a sex god or something. In fact that’s pretty normal for women to have that..blockage you know?”

You chuckled lightly to yourself, amused at the way his version of comforting you. You breathed out loudly, nodding to yourself in the mirror before swinging the door open to find Dominic leaning on the doorway, running right into his chest.

You were taken off guard as his arms wrapped around you, your tense shoulders relaxing as you embraced him back.

“You ok?”

“Yeah..don’t rub it in.” You said muffled into his chest.

His arms loosened around you as his tall frame loomed over you. His brown eyes bore into yours from above, rendering you silent. You watched as his eyes snuck a glance at your lips, quickly snapping back up to your eyes.

“Y/N…I-”

Before he could get a word out you moved around him, walking into his room and turning over your shoulder.

“That blunt and ice cream won’t finish itself Dom!”

You watched him smirk to himself, shaking his head as he made his way back into his room with you

After several blunts and snacks, you two found yourselves wrapped up in blankets on your second movie of the night: The Breakfast Club.

“This movie is amazing.” You quipped up with a mouth full of ice cream, eyes not leaving the screen. You heard him hum in agreement, eyes sneaking a quick glance at him as he leaned back, shifting his hips underneath his blanket. My god, if I was on that lap I would-

“Y/N”

“Dom” Your eyes were glued to the screen as you pretended to be completely invested in the film, and not as invested as you were intently ignoring whatever conversation he was about to start.

“About earlier…you know I’m not good with emotional sappy conversations so..bear with me...” He trailed off, pausing the movie with the remote and forcing you to find another object in the room to fixate on.

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry they didn’t..care enough to make sure you were good. I know I clown on you alot but you don’t deserve that shit.”

His hand gently made its way under your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“You hear me?” His eyes searched yours valiantly.

“Yes.” You breathed out, freezing at how intense his gaze fanned over your features.

His eyes dropped to where he began to cup your hands gently in his, as your eyes followed. You two were never touchy, and the frequency of physical touch tonight was stoking the already intense fire that was stirring in you for him.

“Fingers crossed the next man that gets the honor of touching you is caring, and gives your body the respect it deserves. Hm?”

“Fingers crossed” you said quietly, trying to hide your breath that was now ragged from the little contact.

You looked up at him, surprised to find his eyes already fixated on you. His teeth caught on his full bottom lip, his chest heaving silently. The lighting in the room, combined with the way his hair fell over his face made your body run warm. The sweet smell of his cologne mixed with weed filled your lungs and made you dizzy with desire from how close you were sitting.

Fuck it.

“Dom”

“Y/N?”

You leaned over quickly, smashing your lips into his. It took him no time to connect your lips, hands snaking around your waist. A moment later, you pulled away, leaning your forehead against his, eyes filled with desire as they met his.

“What was that for?” He breathed in and out, attempting to catch his breath.

“I…I want to try it…with you.” Your voice faltered as your sentence went on.

“It? What’s it?”

“Sex.”

His eyes danced back and forth between yours searching for any doubt.

Your hands covered your face. “Its okay if you don’t we can go to bed and pretend like this never happened I just-”

You were cut off by his lips smashing into yours again, and he flipped you two over so he was hovering on top of you. His hips grinded into the heat between your legs as they wrapped around him . You whined into the kiss from the friction as he pulled back, his hand placed under your chin.

“Are you sure you want this? With me I mean?”

“Yes Dom. Please. I need you.” you whimpered out as you grind your hips up into his to emphasize your point.

A quiet groan fell from his lips. “If you ever…and I mean ever want to stop you tell me okay? I want you too but this is about you. I want you to feel good but I need you to let me know what you need more or less of. Deal?”

You nodded silently, eyes boring into his.

“Words Y/N.”

“Yes- I mean deal” tumbled from your lips that had already begun to darken from his kiss.

He chuckled to himself, diving back in to connect your lips again. His lips danced their way from your mouth, across your jaw, and down your neck, deciding on a particularly sensitive spot to mark. Your breath began to waiver and small whimpers caught in your throat as his mouth left marks across your neck, surely to be a sickening purple in the morning.

“You sound even prettier than I had imagined.” He whispered near your ear, making your stomach turn in the most amazing way.

As he continued his attack on your neck, his long fingers began to toy with the hem of your hoodie, dipping his hands underneath to run his hands up your stomach.

“May I?” He asked, referring to your hoodie that had been pushed above your stomach by now.

“You may.” You smiled shyly at him as he gently pushed your hoodie off your body, exposing your baby pink bra to him . He met you in your bareness, leaning back to pull his hoodie over his head. Your teeth bit down on your bottom lip at the sight of his chest, the sharpness of his abs that were littered with tattoos had made you clench your legs together in a fever of need.

He leaned back into you, finding his place once again between your legs as his lips kissed across your chest.

“Arch up for me” He muttered.

You obeyed, arching your back up as he unclipped your bra with his free hand, sliding it off you gently. A gasp from your lips broke the thick silence in the room as his lips gently wrapped around your nipple, his large hand twisting your other nipple gently in his hand. Your hands rushed to loop into his unruly curls.

He continued his descent down your abdomen, leaving open mouthed kisses on his path until he reached the waistline of your pajamas. He sat up, kissing your forehead as he massaged your hips.

“Lift up.” He breathed out. Your hips lifted in response as he pulled down your pajamas in one swift motion. He toyed with the hem of your panties, eyes catching onto yours as you stared at him.

“Remember our deal okay?” His eyebrows raised.

“Okay.” You responded shakily. Although you were not a virgin, the line you were crossing was enough to leave you in shock. You had reached a point beyond return and there was something about the sheer size of the tent in his pants that did not lend to not being overcome with nervousness.

He hooked his ring clad fingers into the loop of your panties, pulling them down gently. He sat back on his knees, admiring you completely bare to him, your body running hot from his gaze.

“Good god you are so beautiful..” He shook his head in disbelief. You looked up at your best friend, and saw everything that love could offer in human form. It was almost comical how whipped he had you from a few touches. He slid down between your legs, flat on his stomach and wrapping his arms around your thighs.

He peppered open mouth kisses and hickeys between your thighs, getting dangerously close to where you needed him most. He blew a cool stream of air over your clit, causing you to jolt your hips trying to chase some type of sensation, in response he pushes your hips down gently, readjusting his grip on you.

“Relax baby, I got you” He quipped before suddenly wrapping his lips around your center. A silent moan lodged in your throat at the sudden contact. He began to work over you with his tongue, humming in pleasure as your moan finally released from your chest, echoing in his small room.

Your hands searched the bed wildly for something to hold onto, one of your hands settling deep in his curls while the other gripped tightly on his bicep. You grinded up into his grip, breath labored and laced with ongoing whimpers. Just then, Dominic pulled back from you, earning a whine of frustration from your needy lips.

“Shh…I’m gonna add a finger now, okay?” He asked gently. You nodded fervently, desperate for him to touch you. Your body tensed as his digit slid into you easily thanks to the wetness that had pooled between your legs. He thrusted gently, making your mouth fall open as he repeatedly brushed over your g-spot.

“Can you add a second?” You labored out through heavy breaths.

He silently obliged, sliding a second finger gently inside of you, earning him a gasp and a mantra of his name tumbling from your lips like a broken record. A high pitched sound that he had never heard before left your bruised lips as he returned his mouth to your clit while still pumping his fingers into you.

Everything felt more intense, and it was making you dizzy. You felt pleasure running through your veins, making your eyes roll back and your nails dig into his bicep. Your hips jolted up and in response Dom wrapped his hands tightly around your thighs, locking you in his grip and keeping you from moving. You felt an unfamiliar coil in your stomach, and it was almost too much for you to handle.

“Dom I-I can’t” You whined out through eyes that were squeezed closed, attempting to loosen his grip on you and run from the intensity that he had built up between your legs.

“Yes” He peppered in between kisses on your center, his fingers not letting up their pace. “You can. That’s an orgasm baby, I know you can get there for me. Breathe.”

It was almost like your body was programmed to his words, because just then the coil in your abdomen had snapped. Your vision went white and you could hear nothing but your own pulse in your ears, you were sure you could faintly hear Dom’s voice in the distance. A surge of pure unadulterated pleasure rushed through you, paralyzing you in his grip while rendering you speechless except for the screams of his name that echoed in the tiny room.

As you came down, you slowly opened your eyes to find Dominic staring at you with the goofiest smile one could muster. He looked so innocent as if he wasn’t covered in your juices and hadn’t just performed witchcraft between your legs that were still shaking.

“Dom, what the fuck.” You heaved out.

“I know right?” He quipped while massaging your hips. He leaned over to kiss your forehead.”Do you still wanna continue? I know that was…a lot, or at least it seemed like it was. I don’t wanna push you too far if not.” Your eyes raked over his frame, nodding enthusiastically.

Your confirmation was all it took for him to remove his pajama pants in one swift movement. He followed by slowly removing his boxers, groaning as his dick sprung free from its confines. Your mouth fell agape. You had always had a guess that he was well endowed, and yes he was, but you never thought that a dick could be..pretty?

“Don’t stare, it makes me nervous.” He mocked with a small chuckle, earning a small exhausted smile from you. He found his place between your legs, his dick rubbing lightly between your wet folds, making you both groan. His free hand dipped between your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“Let me know if you want me to stop, okay? I never wanna make you feel anything other than good. Deal?”

“Deal” You nodded. He pecked your lips, dropping his head to look at where you two connected between your legs. He massaged his tip lightly between your folds, letting his tip gently slip inside, as you held your breath and his own ran shakily. Your eyes squeezed together and your hands gripped his biceps.

“Breathe, don’t go blue on me baby.”

You tried to remember how to breathe, but all you could think about was the delicious feeling of him gently stretching you out. His thrusts stayed slow as he practiced getting deeper and deeper until your hips met each other. You arched your chest up until it met his tip as his tip began to massage deeply against your g-spot.

In no time, he had worked up to a decent pace after you gave him the okay, your body running hotter than ever as he worked into you while latching his lips onto your already decorated neck. The room felt like it was spinning in the best way, and the groans he elicited into your neck made you wanna explode. You were ripped out of your trance after he suddenly pulled out and flipped you onto your stomach.

“Dom what are you-” Your sentence was interrupted as the feeling of a cold liquid ran up your spine from base to tip. You whined at the sudden temperature change, whimpering as the cold was replaced with his warm mouth that had begun indulging in the ice cream off of your back.

“Tasted even better off of you than I imagined.” he commented, following his words with immediately slipping back into you completely, snatching your already ragged breath out of your chest for the thousandth time that night. Your nails clawed into the sheets under you, searching for a grip to cope with the rush of pleasure that had overtaken your body. He trailed his hands up your torso and arms, stopping at your hands as he interlinked your fingers with his own, not relenting on his pace inside of you.

The room was filled with the melody of your collective moans paired with the harsh colliding of your ass into his hips. A thin blanket of sweat covered both your bodies, and once again he had brought you to a point where you were thrashing underneath his touch.

The whispers near your ear were driving you insane, and he began snaking his hand down around you and between your legs, using the wetness there that had pooled to his advantage. His fingers were now circling your sensitive bundle of nerves. That familiar coil tightened again in your lower abdomen, leaving you biting down into the pillow and arching up into his thrusts.

“You think you can be a good girl and give me a second one?” He toyed.

All that left your mouth was a string of desperate whines.

“I can’t hear you baby…” He trailed off, thrusting particularly deep at the end of his words, leaving your mouth agape.

“I..I can’t…too much”You forced out between moans.

“I think…” He increased his pace between your hips and rubbed deliciously fast around your clit “You can.”

Your eyes squeezed together as he relentlessly worked at the coil that had tightened beyond belief in your abdomen. His lips trailed up your ear, and soon that coil had snapped, making your legs lock and a string of incoherent moans tumble from your lips as he brought you to your peak for the second time that night.

“Fucking hell…” He groaned at the sight of you coming undone and the way you were relentlessly clenching down on him. He pumped a few more strokes, pushing one last time into you to a hilt until you felt his warm release pooling your insides.

He suddenly pulled out, making both of you gasp. You were flat on the bed now, eyes fluttering as you felt the bed dip and his footsteps leave the room. You looked over your shoulder, wondering where he had trailed off to with such urgency. You heard the water run in the bathroom and he returned moments later with a warm wet washcloth.

“You think you can flip onto your back for me?” He asked as he stood above you.

“Mhm” You begrudgingly obliged. “What are you doing?”

“Cleaning you up duh” He said, shaking his head.

He spread your legs, trailing the washcloth down to your stomach and thighs. He gently brushed it over your center and beyond, earning a whine from you at the sensitivity.

“Shh I know, but you quite literally made a mess. And I hate to be that guy, but you’re gonna have to come pee baby” he cooed, earning a groan from you. He stood up, slipping on his pajamas before lifting you up and placing his oversized hoodie over you, flooding your nose with his scent. He suddenly lifted you up into his arms. You felt him walking out the room, placing you down on the toilet making your feet come in contact with the cold tile.

He leaned up against the counter, looking down at you with a big dopey smile as you waited for your center to stop pulsing so you could pee.

“You’re just gonna, stand there and watch me?” You quipped, raising your eyebrow.

“Yeah unfortunately, for you.” He fake sighed.

A moment of comfortable silence passed before you broke it suddenly with your thoughts.

“Dom that was…I didn’t know I could…that it could feel like that.” You shook your head in disbelief before continuing. “I thought I was like..broken.”

He smiled softly before leaning over to kiss your forehead. “You did great. And you know, I’d like to think I know a few things.” You snorted in response to his cockyness.

After you had finished and gotten cleaned up, you stumbled your way back to the bedroom with his help, flopping onto the bed.

He brought the covers over you, tucking you in and sliding up behind you to hold your frame to his chest.

“Y/N…I love you.” He whispered, in a tone that made you understand that he wasn’t just saying that as your best friend.

“I love you too.” You hummed contently.

“I know this is probably a weird time to ask seeing as you actively have a little of me leaking out of you..but…” His voice ran shaky “Would you…and I understand if not I just wanted..for you to be my girlfriend.

You turned in his arms, eyes searching for any sign of a joke, to no avail. “Deal.” You smirked at him, knowing he understood.

“Deal.” He kissed you, smiling into the kiss, before you turned back into his arms. His curls tickled your neck as he feathered tender kisses down your neck before he finally settled in the pillow and fell asleep.

#dominic fike smut #dominic fike #naples #fanfic #first blog

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fiapartridge · 1 year

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the perfect moment | luke hughes

summary: luke's leaving for boston and you need to tell him you love him before it's too late...

a/n: hello, everyone! this is my first imagine since joining tumblr. hope u like it! <3

Luke was leaving tonight. You felt your heart drop down to the farthest, unreachable parts of your stomach as you watched Quinnipiac win the semifinals at the Frozen Four. It was over: The University of Michigan’s season, playoffs, Luke’s college hockey career. It was all over.

Ellen and Jim were already off the couch, making calls with a couple of people on the Devils’ coaching staff, making sure he was on the next flight to Boston by the time he got off the ice.

It was hard to stomach the fact that he wasn’t coming home this time; that he was going straight to Boston for the morning skate with the Devils and then immediately back to Jersey to train with the team. Of course you two talked about it. It was always a thought lingering in the back of both of your minds, but you didn’t really think of it being an actual possibility.

It wasn’t like you weren’t happy for Luke. He was your best friend. You would be happy for him wherever he went and whatever he did, but he wasn’t coming home, and you never got to tell him that you loved him more than Sunday morning pancakes and Movie Night Fridays. You loved him, like you wanted to run onto that ice and kiss him before he stepped foot on the private jet that would force hundreds and thousands of miles between the two of you.

You were in love with Luke, and he didn’t even know.

Before you could get off the couch and wallow to your own home down the street, you got a text from Ethan, and then Mark, and then Dylan.

And lastly, from Luke.

Ethan: He’s leaving TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE.

Mark: You’ve loved the kid for as long as you’ve known him. You gotta tell him before he leaves Y/N/N.

Dylan: I'M BOOKING YOU THE NEXT FLIGHT TO FLORIDA. YOU HAVE TO TELL HIM BEFORE ITS TOO LATE.

Luke: Getting on a flight to Boston later tonight. I’ll call you first thing in the morning. I don't want this to be a goodbye. I just wanna see you.

Your eyes widened as you clicked each notification from the boys. You didn’t even know they knew about your crush on Luke. But maybe it was obvious? Maybe they could see the slight glimmer in your eye every time you met Luke outside the locker room after a home game, or maybe they could see the way you hug him, how you squeeze him a little tighter and a little longer than a best friend would, or maybe they could see the way you talk to him, like he’s all you’ve ever known; like he’s all you ever want to know. When he’s around, everyone else disappears.

And you weren’t going to give that up.

Dylan: I JUST BOUGHT YOUR TICKET GET YOUR ASS TO THE AIRPORT. RIGHT NOW.

Is this actually happening right now? Oh my God, this is happening.

You jumped up from the couch, startling both yours and Luke’s parents. Your heart was racing and they were staring at you like you were crazy.

“Are you alright, honey?” Ellen asked, looking back and forth between you and your mom.

You shook your head. “I- I gotta go,” you stammered as you rushed out of the Hughes family’s home and down the street to your own. You ran through the front door, tripped up the steps to your room, and quickly grabbed a backpack from your closet, filling it with a day’s worth of clothes, a mini toiletry bag, your wallet, and an extra charger.

You bounded down the stairs and sprinted back to the Hughes’ house, praying that someone would be willing to take you to the airport or else all of this would be for nothing.

You busted the front door open as everyone’s heads turned to you. You were out of breath, your backpack was slung messily around your shoulder, and your heart was beating faster than the speed of light.

“I,” you breathed harder, trying to push out one of the most important sentences of your life. “I need a ride to the airport!”

Ellen and your mom knowingly smiled from ear to ear, like they understood why you were leaving without you ever having to tell them. They always knew about your feelings for Luke, they were just waiting for the moment it would all come out, which happened to be tonight. So calling them eager to help you would be quite the understatement; they were absolutely elated.

Ellen grabbed the car keys and your mom opened the garage while the dads sat there, watching the entire scene with their own sly smiles on their faces. Your dad would never admit it to you, but he always hoped that you would tell Luke that you liked him. He was the only person that your dad felt safe to leave you with. Not that you needed Luke’s protection or anything, but he knew he would never break your heart; the boy wasn’t capable of it.

You threw your backpack in the backseat of Ellen’s car and your seatbelt was barely secured before Ellen stepped on the gas and raced down the sleepy streets of Michigan. Your mom squealed in the passenger seat as she held on tight to the handle on the roof of the car.

“We were really expecting you to tell him sooner, but I love a dramatic running sequence,” Ellen beamed, smiling into the rearview mirror.

You shook your head. “Sorry, what?”

“We’ve been waiting 12 years for you to tell him you love him!” your mom butted in, turning around in her seat to look at you.

“12 years? What?”

“Sorry my boy is clueless!” Ellen apologized. “Seems like he got that trait from his father.”

You laughed and the three of you continued talking about your plan for when you see Luke in Florida. But when you saw the airport in full view, the anxiety and nervous bubbles danced around your stomach like they were giving a tireless performance.

This is seriously happening.

They parked on the curb, wishing you good luck as you ran out of the car and darted through the airport doors. Security went by swimmingly fast and before you knew it, you were seated on a nearly empty plane, Florida bound.

༊*·˚

Two and a half hours later, you were dashing through Tampa International Airport like your life depended on it. Luckily, the airport was quiet and empty. Nobody seemed to notice the girl that was fighting back the tiredness in her legs and the drowsiness in her eyes.

You couldn’t get tired. You needed to see Luke.

Ethan, Dylan, Mark, and Mackie were the first people you saw when you made it outside the airport. Dylan was jumping up and down in the air, waving his hands back and forth as if you weren’t the only person outside with them.

You sprung into the backseat of Mackie’s rental car as the boys started shouting to step on the gas. There was no time to spare. You were in Florida, Luke was about to get on a flight to Boston, and your heart wasn’t ready to give up yet.

“MACKIE, IF YOU DON’T STEP ON THE GAS, I’M LEAVING YOU HERE AND DRIVING THIS CAR MYSELF!” you yelled, causing Mackie to jump in his seat and steer the car down the freeway in a hurried manner.

They knew not to mess with you when you were stressed. It was like a rule of thumb. As you five raced down the road, heading straight back to the arena, you felt your phone vibrate and the screen light up. It was a text from Luke.

Luke: Hey, I’m leaving in a bit. Text me when you can.

You shook your head, gulping down your nerves. He can’t leave. Not yet.

Five minutes later, Ethan was pushing you out of the car and Mark was grabbing your hand, leading you around the arena— leading you to Luke.

You two weaved through Quinnipiac fans that had not yet cleared the arena and through coaches that looked at you confused, wondering how you got there. But when the Michigan hockey team saw you, all you were met with were smiles and cheers. They all knew what you were here for— who you were here for.

They were lined along the walls outside of the locker room. Mark let go of your hand as you turned to all of the guys. Luca smiled at you as he placed his hand on your shoulder. “He’s inside the locker room.”

You nodded your head, took a quick breath, and slowly, hesitantly walked to the door.

“Hey!” Dylan shouted. You turned to him, wondering what was so important that he had to say it right before the big moment. He smirked, a mischievous smile dancing on his lips. “Don’t forget to kiss him.”

The guys whistled and hollered in response as your cheeks immediately flared. You laughed, rolling your eyes and turning back to the locker room door.

Here goes nothing.

You slowly turned the doorknob and quietly walked into the room. Luke was the only person in there. He was folding clothes into a suitcase as a blue Nike backpack and his hockey gear sat on the ground beside him. You closed the door shut and it immediately grabbed his attention.

His eyes searched the entire room before meeting yours. He didn’t say anything, his jaw was too slacked to push out a single word. You left your backpack by the door and smiled softly as you walked towards him.

He felt like he was dreaming, like he conjured the sight of you because there was no way you were actually there. He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. Surely he was just tired. His mind was playing tricks on him. That had to be it. But when you were still there when he opened his eyes, he realized it wasn’t a dream; he wasn’t going crazy.

You were there. You were really there.

He couldn’t believe it.

“I didn’t want to say goodbye over the phone,” you said.

He grinned. “So you flew a thousand miles just to see me?”

You nodded, a smile managing to escape from your lips. “Among other things,” you said before crashing your lips onto his. Your hands were met with the ends of his curly brown hair and his were met with the small of your back. It was the kind of kiss that you could never tell your friends about because there was no way to accurately describe how perfect it was. It was the kind of kiss that was separated by smiles and tiny laughs. It was the kind of kiss that made you realize that you had never felt this happy in your whole life.

Yes, Luke was going to leave. He was always going to leave. But at this moment, none of that mattered. This kiss, you and him, your hands in his hair and his on your back, that was all that mattered.

This.

This perfect moment.

The moment wasn’t over when your lips disconnected. His eyes were still on yours and his lips were still stained with your lipstick. It was you and him, just like it always has been.

“I,” you two spoke at the same time, giggling when you caught yourselves talking over each other.

“You first,” you said.

He shook his head. “Seems like you had something important to tell me if you flew a thousand miles to be here.”

“Fair point,” you chuckled. He smiled back— a soft smile. Like this smile was meant just for you to enjoy. Like this smile belonged to you– signed, sealed, and delivered. Your hands rested on the nape of Luke’s neck.

It’s now or never.

You paused, played with the cuticles of your nails, shuffled your feet, and breathed. “I love you— more than just friends, and I needed you to know that before you left.”

And yes, you just kissed the boy you’ve liked for the past 12 years, but some part of you still expected him to turn you away. To tell you that he doesn’t feel the same. To tell you that all you guys had ever been were friends.

But when he pulled you closer by the waist and attached his lips to yours once again, you knew his answer. He pressed his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed for a moment afterwards, like he wasn’t ready to leave this moment just yet.

And when his sage green eyes met yours, he grinned, and said the next few words so softly, it felt like a pillow that was waiting to catch him in case he fell. He already knew you loved him, but just like you, he was still scared, like you could take it all back and realize that it isn’t him you wanted.

But who else would you fly a thousand miles for at one in the morning?

“I’m leaving in a few minutes, but I just— I think I’ve always been in love with you. It’s always been you,” he smiled, still terrified. But just as he did with you, you pulled him into the biggest kiss ever— which was shortly interrupted by the entirety of the Michigan hockey team.

Mostly Duker.

“HEY, THEY’RE KISSING IN HERE! I knew you could do it, Y/N/N,” he smiled. “YO, YOU OWE ME FIVE BUCKS, BRINDLEY!”

You giggled into Luke's chest, shielding your blush-stained face from the rest of the team. You were beyond happy.

And yes, Luke still left for Boston, but he didn't leave empty-handed. He had your love with him after all.

#luke hughes #luke hughes imagine #luke hughes x reader #umich imagine #umich hockey #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #umich boys

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junnieverse · 8 months

Text

BAD IDEA RIGHT ? ➳ P. SUNGHOON

➙ synopsis: you were completely over sunghoon, no feelings for him whatsoever... or atleast that's what you would tell your friends. he was no good for you and yet no matter how many other guys came your way, sunghoon was the only one on your mind, maybe reconnecting as 'friends' would be fine, it wasn't a bad idea... right?

pairing: park sunghoon x afab!reader

genre: slightly suggestive, a little angst, tutor x student trope, fwb to lovers to exes (to somewhat fwb again) au

word count: 1.5k

warnings: not proofread, mentions of rain, swearing, mentions of drinking (wine), shirtless sunghoon, shh

a/n: thank you for the support you've all given this series so far everyone, please don't forget to reblog if you enjoyed this, that would be of great support too!

— GUTS X ENHYPEN SERIES MASTERLIST !

Hearing your phone ring for the third time in the past thirty minutes, you excuse yourself from your group of friends playing uno and go up to check your phone by the living room wall charging.

Looking over at the caller id on the screen, your eyes immediately light up but just as quickly you feel yourself deflate reading the contact name, 'LOSER NOT WORTH MENTIONING' who happened to be your ex boyfriend Park Sunghoon.

It must've been one of those nights you thought to yourself, he only ever calls you when he's feeling lonely and wanted some... company.

You had known Sunghoon through your professor when they needed you to tutor a particular student and there they introduced you two to each other and the physical attraction between the both of you was undeniable.

And that's when everything changed.

You used to be a nervous wreck in front of him, it was like your brain froze around him and you would always malfunction whenever he got too close to you when you were helping him with his school work.

The tutoring sessions soon turned into the both of you meeting in corners of hallways to sneak little kisses before lectures, to going under the bleachers to make out and then even going to each other's apartments to 'keep each other warm' on rainy days (as well as perfectly sunny days), you were both completely obsessed with being around and touching each other.

It didn't take long for Sunghoon to confess his attraction towards you and suggest you both officially going out as a couple to which you agreed to… despite your friends telling you to not do it.

They knew his reputation, everyone did including yourself but you wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt that he wasn't as much of a womaniser as he was portrayed to be.

Before starting to date Sunghoon, you weren't the only girl he was seeing, you just thought you were (just like all the others thought) and your friends were quick to see past the bullshit and tell you about it but you were blinded by love.

"I really think this thing you have going on with Sunghoon is a bad idea, you deserve better." your friend says to you while you both were walking together to your next lecture together.

"C'mon, just give him a chance, Hoon really isn't that bad of a guy as he's made out to be, I get to see the sweeter side of him most of you don't." you respond and your gaze suddenly landed on Sunghoon talking to a close friend of his a few feet away from you.

Quickly bidding your friend a bye telling them you would be right back, you make your way to Hoon leaving your friend disprited after their failed attempts to get you away from Sunghoon.

Despite how you thought your relationship would be flourishing, your break up with Sunghoon was one that came after alot of pondering and arguments with him.

It was evident that besides the strong physical and sexual attraction you both had for each other, emotionally he wasn't as invested and it felt one sided.

In the end, you knew you couldn't settle in a relationship with someone who didn't like you as much as you liked them, you just wish you saw the incompatibility a little earlier.

After the break up, you had still kept in contact with Sunghoon deciding to just remain… friends but it was more than clear to your group of friends that Sunghoon wanted a bit more than just a friendship with you.

Hearing a sudden notification from your phone after the several missed calls that were left, you notice the text messages Sunghoon was sending you.

LOSER NOT WORTH MENTIONING :

- Hey, haven't seen you in awhile

- Just got a new place so how about you come over and maybe we can hangout and catch up

- Here's my address, xxx-xxx-xxx

- See you soon pretty

Reading over the messages again in your head, you convince yourself that you were unaffected and composed.

You were completely over Sunghoon, whatever you both had, unresolved feelings and all, they were gone.

Although, were you actually considering going over to your ex's place to see him..?

You knew very well this was no good, a very bad idea your friends would've been completely against but you decided to follow your irrational thoughts.

"Fuck it it's fine." you whisper under your breath before grabbing your phone and car keys and rushing to put on your shoes to leave.

"Uhh, so something came up and I gotta go but I will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye guys!" you tell them leaving without giving them a chance to respond nor a proper reason as they all looked at each other confused but knowingly.

"She's going over to Sunghoon's huh?" your one friend asks rhetorically looking at the front door you had just rushed out of as your other friends shake their heads knowing there wasn't much they could do now.

Running over to your car, you were immediately hit by the heavy rain outside and you felt instantly relieved once inside considering how drenched you'd become in those few seconds.

This wasn't the first time Sunghoon would call you over to 'keep him company' at home when he was alone since you had broken up and you knew this was foolish of you and you had tried to stop.

Having the good friends you had, they always tried to help you detach from Sunghoon which had worked in the beginning for a few months where you had completely cut him off, not hearing anything from him but he soon reached out to you after some time and you had fallen back into the rabbit hole.

"We're just two friends reconnecting, I don't see the problem with that." you say to your best friend with a shrug of your shoulders as you were texting Sunghoon and she easedropped looking at the phone over your shoulder.

"I've known you for years and that has got to be the biggest lie you've ever said." she says shaking her head in disapproval.

"I mean it though, tonight we're just gonna hang out like old friends." you respond but it felt more like you were trying to convince yourself nothing would happen.

Getting out of your car upon arrival, you notice a figure on the second floor of the building standing outside and you notice Sunghoon waving at you with his infamous smile on display for you.

He was an incredibly beautiful man, you can admit you've seen your fair share of really hot guys but every time you look at Sunghoon you can't seem to remember when and he's the only one on your mind.

He had you wrapped right around his finger and you knew that.

Absolutely whipped for him.

Going up the stairs leading up to his door he greets you with a tight hug wrapping his arms around your waist not seeming to care that he was getting wet from your damp clothes.

"Sorry about the rain, how about you shower and I'll get you some of my fresh clothes to change into." he offers and you agree quietly admiring the neat decor of his house as he leads the way.

"Should I get you anything to drink? I've got some water, soda and wine." he asks you as you take a seat on his couch after your shower letting your hair air dry as you were wearing nothing but his black shirt which was conveniently oversized and up to your mid thigh.

"Some wine should be good." you tell him as he left a lingering gaze on your figure before he snapped out of it and nodded going into the kitchen to get your drink.

Your phone buzzed on the coffee table in front of you and a message from your best friend pops up.

Bestie ♡ :

- Hope you're okay. Call me if you need anything :)

(Y/n) :

- Yep I'm good

- I'm sorry I can't come back for the sleepover but dw everything is fine

- Goodnight <3

"Here's your wine." sunghoon reaches out handing you the glass as he had one of his own before taking a seat next to you shuffling closer.

"I missed you." he says breaking the silence as he placed his wine glass on the coffee table and gently took yours doing the same trying to still maintain eye contact with you.

"I missed you t-too." you shyly stutter out looking down.

It felt like he had you in a trance, you were moving on your own, or maybe it was the win doing it's thing but before you knew it your hands were cupping Sunghoon's face as his rested on your thigh as you both shared a deep and sensual kiss.

Everything after that felt like a complete blur.

The next morning you found yourself in unfamiliar sheets but this was an all too familiar scene of events and next to you sound asleep was a breathtaking shirtless Sunghoon.

This was a bad idea right?

SERIES TAGLIST: @enhastolemyheart @jungwonscafe @firstclassjaylee @bahiyyihina

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frenchtantan · 6 months

Text

After yesterday's teaduo date and q!Tina hinting at her demonic origin, I really hope cc!Tina messages the admins to explore it further.

BUT if she doesn't, there is a very simple way for q!Tina to be confronted with the part of herself she loathes: the Ordem Paranormal rooms.

Because there is no way in Hell (hehe) she isn't drawn to the Blood Room. Even without the glaring theme, the entity of strong feelings is literally her to a T(ea).

Imagine her mental journey upon choosing her room. Imagine her stepping into the Blood Room, q!Bagi by her side. Seeing the theme, at first she's only a little uneasy. Then, she reads the book and her face drops. It's like it was written FOR her.

No, no, there are other rooms, surely the others are more fitting. Or maybe this is like a horoscope thing, it's all vague enough to fit anyone's. She turns around, q!Bagi smiles at her, and she does too. It'll all be a-ok.

But then the Death room doesn't fit.

And q!Tina doesn't really actively seek Knowledge either.

Surely the last room is hers, she's energetic right? She likes a bit of Chaos, right?

But thinking about choosing Chaos feels... Off. No matter how much she tries to imagine it, it's not... hers.

As she ponders, growing more and more anxious, people around her make conversation. She learns about the name plates. She hears that the Chaos room has many members, while the Blood room has few.

She's told she can take her time and re-visit all the rooms to make her choice. She nods, keeping a brave face but her heart is beating oh so fast.

She hesitantly steps into the Blood Room once more. There must be something here that feels off like the others... There HAS to be!

But as she looks around, she sees them. Two names, glowing bright on red canvas signs.

BADBOYHALO

IRONMOUSE

Two demons. The ONLY two demons on the island.

Why? Why of all the rooms did they have to pick her- THAT room?

Oh no.

No, no, no, no, no.

She has trouble breathing. The Blood room feels smaller and smaller, as if it were wrapping itself around her, embracing her.

She can't take it.

Taking the elevator, she sees q!Bagi's smile turn into worry as she stutters an excuse and runs for the exit.

She needs to go away, far away. She's done it all her life, what's one more time? She can escape it, she can!

She can...

She...

#sorry this started as a fun suggestion #then I got carried away lmao #but imagine #qsmp #qsmp lore #qsmp tina #qsmp bagi #qsmp ironmouse #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp cellbit #teaduo #bagina

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izpira-se-zlato · 2 months

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JO Paris, 22.03.24

Gig report! Compiled this morning in the car to Antwerp with help form @zadig-fate and @yoda-bor 💛 I recorded everything except Katrina (bc my camera app crashed in the middle), so I'll upload this once I'm at a place with stable wifi again :D

all my buses were delayed so I power walked to the train station. Then that train was delayed so I almost missed my Eurostar. Then my Eurostar was also delayed. "That's what I call a Deutsche Bahn special, actually." – Kris ("when your first train is late but then it's okay because the second train is also delayed")

so many people I knew in the queue. From Helsinki. From London last year. From Utrecht. 😊💛

when I grabbed my number, Jan and Nace returned to the venue (and they were so pretty in daylight and in person)

Nace said hi as they walked past 😊

their postures??? Nace has definitely worked on his posture, meanwhile Jan appears so slim and small. It's wild.

Jan and Jure returned to the venue together, looking… Pissed is too harsh a word, but frowning? So we first kinda thought they were actually pissed off. But then Nace showed up a minute later, his usual sunny self, and was immediately accosted by fans. So. I assume it was less "pissed off" and more "do not approach" (and it worked)

soundcheck was Gola and Vem da greš, which we could hear every time they opened the doors (this was my last general access gig. It's EA from here on out, baby!)

Kris and I had decided to go on the balcony and got spots right next to the sound booth, where we were joined by @thisismyobsessionnow 🫶

it was warm but the sound was really good (duh)

also we had nice cushy seats like the old people we are 😂

first opener was a duo of brothers made up of discount Jure and Käärijä if he was French. Discount!Jure had a nice chest (Jure at home)

their music was eh, the lyrics cringe

Kris says they spoke french but I spent most of their set on tumblr/discord so I wasn't listening, but it was a Choice since pretty much none from the EA crowd spoke French

speaking of EA, there were allegedly 60 EA tickets though I saw numbers up to 62 (500 people venue)

JC Stewart was fun

he was told he looked French prime minister. He got confused by president vs prime minister but he also got kinda flustered. He was shown a pic and was "oh yeah, I see it"

we got Katrina opener

Nace. Jfc.

the venue was super hot so I tried to appreciate the fit while he had it on in full – white buttoned shirt with a sweater vest over it and a proper tie and glasses, going for the full teacher look except hot???

I still spent a good chunk of the gig looking at Jure though. The elevated balcony spot gave ussuch a nice view of him

Bojan was smiley and sounded way less congested than in Utrecht (maybe he's on the mend?)

Kris on the other hand was sipping tea on stage. In particular very sassily during Demoni

Kris had guitar problems at the beginning of Šta bih ja and went to Kiki to get it fixed but Bojan didn't see and so was actually worried for a moment that Kris had gotten sick off-stage. Kris was adorable in reassuring him that he was fine

they were all so mobile again

og demoni scream. In the middle. Might have been Bojan letting out his anxiety over Kris having disappeared from stage

"Kris, honey" and then that moment. What in the BoKris was that. I just turned to Kris and said that out loud bc what the fuck

There was a sizeable crowd of Slovenians in the audience and Bojan was delighted

fairly even split in the crowd for French vs foreigners, though the French were louder in yelling

the most hilarious to me moment: Bojan did his spiel about "who here experiences panic attacks?" And the crowd cheered, and he was like "yay! Panic attacks! It's me!" And Kris next to me went "I'm the problem, it's me," and literally on the last syllable, Bojan started saying the exact same thing. One brain cell. Or maybe he has the stream on his in-ears

Barve oceana 🫶🫶💛💛

according to Astrid, I looked ridiculously happy (I was ridiculously happy)

best galaxy of me version tonight. I still don't like it though 😂 it's gonna be my metulji 😂

Bojan went into the crowd for Umazane misli

it's so fun to watch from above

Vita was his trusty shadow and also a beacon of light to spot Bojan with

this time I don't think they forgot her in the crowd

Bojan made the balcony sing while he was still in the crowd. But it was mostly just Kris, Madeleine, and me, at least on the bleachers/seated part. We still gave our best 😂

Carpe Diem was not part of their "encore" but came before

no Tokio :( might be the first show without it?

fucking Novi val

the way Jure jumped up and sprinted to trade a drumstick for a baguette, it was so hilarious

he was so happy, and he first made fun of Nace for being unable to eat it

he shared it with Jan

Jan got chocolate and they put it into the baguette and then shared it.

Jure let everyone else also take a bite, including Bojan who was ostensibly singing

Nace bottle feeding Kris. What the fuck. Can someone make sure they still don't know about AO3?

no Umazane shenanigans even though Jan and Nace had talked right before it so I'd been hopeful

so many um versions in other langauges. It wasn't the longest rendition, but we also

when Bojan said we'd get the original Slovene version, I thought it would be the one he made up on the spot when they went on stage to play it all the way back? When they were babies. So it was a small disappointment when it was just the regular Slovene version 😂

Bojan asked the Slovenians if they were able to tell that they weren't playing at home and they said no and Bojan was so so delighted

he's also given the mic to people in the audience outside of Umazane misli (ne bi smel and plastika, I want to say)

he sang galaxy of me with a guy from the front row (Josh?)

not a lot of Jance, possibly because they were looking after Kris?

still a lot of eye contact

or maybe it was the fact that they apparently were out in Paris together in the afternoon 😏

my phone was so hot by the end (and I have 4gb left of memory)

after the gig I couldn't find my hat so I was worried I'd left it, so I went back in. Which was how I got JC and Vita to sign my gig memory book

I had forgotten about wanting to grab Vita's signature so if Astrid hadn't reminded me, I would have missed out

the boys got JC Stewart sick, he said his voice was going

It was raining so the boys ran out of the venue towards a van while we cheered. Bojan took a group selfie

Jan and Jure left first with the crew in that van so we assume that the others took a second car

#joker out #jan peteh #nace jordan #kris gustin #bojan cvjeticanin #jure macek #jure maček #kris guštin #bojan cvjetićanin #nace ja jan #bojan ja kris #gig report #my gig footage

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shiinata-library · 1 year

Text

Imagine: Being too focused

Thorin, Fíli, Kíli, Bilbo's reactions when they understand you're just very focused on your job.

You joined Thorin's company in Bree when they stayed at The Prancing Pony. Gandalf recommended you as a guide throughout Middle earth because he knew he won't always be with them. After a long, complicated discussion between him and Thorin, he finally accepted you, but not as a company member, rather as an optional person like Gandalf. So no contract, no part of treasure, and no responsibility for him.

As you just owed a big favour to Gandalf, you were okay with that. As a Ranger of the North, you know Middle earth by heart, so leading them to Erebor will be easy, right?

Thorin

From the start, you ride on a horse, always before everyone, alone staring at the horizon to be sure of the way.

As you're alone, you never talk to anyone. Gandalf is the only one to talk to you sometimes during the day.

Focused on your task to guide them, you don't realise the dwarves are suspicious about you, and you don't try to talk to you either.

You used to eat with Gandalf and Bilbo.

Thorin is the only dwarf who talks to you when he needs it. Only to be sure you took the right way, to tell the truth.

It's hard to believe it but Thorin finds your quiet, cold attitude a little intimidating. Just a little bit.

The first time he sees you laugh is in Rivendell, with Lord Elrond and his two sons after the dinner. Something inside him makes him angry, but he prefers focusing on the map of his father rather than thinking of you.

The second time he sees your serious face broken is when he hugs the hobbit, on the Carrock. But a second later, he is looking at Erebor. He has no time to waste on a woman. He has to stay focused on the quest.

In Laketown, you should be on your guard when the Master of the town offers you to stay freely in an inn for the last night before going to Erebor, but Bilbo makes you taste a glass of wine, then another, then another…

How much wine did you drink? 🤷 What did you do after? Dancing with Bofur? Laughing with Fíli and Kíli? An arm-wrestling match with Dwalin? 🤷 The only thing you know was that you need to cool your head, so you take your coat and get out.

“We’re starting to think you left,” Thorin says as he walks toward you after closing the inn’s door. “Well, now you all are here, you don’t need me anymore. But, no. I just needed to cool my head.”

Thorin stops next to you, so close that you feel his warmth. His coat looks much warmer than yours, but you should stop fixing it. The both of you chat for a while until you realise it’s the first time you really chat with him, and it’s quite pleasant. Plus, he seems as relaxed as you, maybe because of the wine.

Even if you friendly chat with him, you don’t realise you keep your serious face while he smiles at you. He is the future King under the mountain, you can’t laugh with him like any friend, right? At some point, the winter wind makes you shiver, but you’re not cold for long. With the thick coat of Thorin on your shoulders, you are very warm. “Oh, hm, thanks, but you should keep it,” you say, very embarrassed but truly glad to be warm. Even if you smile, you try to hide your embarrassment by tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.

This gesture and your embarrassing face changes something in Thorin’s heart. He never saw you embarrassed and he can’t help but find you very cute and attractive. If you were closer, he would try to do more things to see your shyness tonight. Maybe later, in Erebor, once he will have his mountain back.

Fíli

He and his brothers try to make you laugh more than once with jokes or tricks, but they never succeed.

Yet, Fíli is often quiet and more observant than you think. He sees you smile sometimes, but mostly at the moments he doesn’t expect it.

The first time he sees you beam is just after the trolls. You find a good, light elvish sword and try it alone. A very good sword!

You don’t realise it either, but you smile every day when you eat, sitting before a pretty landscape. Some old ruins coloured by the sunset, for example.

But the moment he sees your most radiant smile is in a small town, in the middle of nowhere. Thorin had decided to stay in a town, leaving everyone else to disperse for their own purchase. A man joins you and hugs you for a long time. Too long to his liking, to tell the truth. You’re also smiling too much for a man who isn’t him.

The night you stay in the town, in the same inn as everyone. In a town, they don’t need you to guide them, so you can rest. You eat your dinner at the inn with the man you met in the afternoon, a friend you haven't seen for a long time.

After finishing your dinner together, your friend leaves on an overnight mission to the region. No sooner has he left than Fíli joins you at your table as you drink your wine.

“Are you bored with us, or do you dislike us?” he asks as he sits on a chair next to you. “I mean, is it boring to join a company of dwarfs?”

You frown. It’s not the first time you talk to him, but it’s the first time you’re alone with him, and you’re surprised by his question. “No, absolutely not. Why do you think that?”

“You never smile or join us in the evening over the fire,” he says as he looks you in the eye, waiting for your answer.

“Oh, I’m sorry. During the day I’m focused on the road and in the evening, I plan the way for the next day according to the stars, and it takes time. I would feel bad if I took the wrong way and delayed your journey,” you reply with a smile before sipping your wine.

Surprised by your smile, he accidentally spills his ale on your trousers and his. He immediately stands up, apologising endlessly.

You burst out laughing, telling him it’s alright, you have another one clean in your bag. His clumsiness is so out of character that you laugh for a while.

After this night, he knows the sound of you laughing is the most melodious sound he has ever heard, and he knows he wants to hear it every day for the rest of his life.

Kíli

From the start, you ride on a horse always before everyone, alone staring at the horizon to be sure of the way.

As you're alone, you never talk to anyone, except maybe Gandalf. He is the only one to talk to you sometimes during the day, or Bilbo because he is never far from Gandalf.

The two young brothers are always trying to make you laugh or get your attention, but it doesn’t work. You don't even do it on purpose. You’re too focused on your job to notice them.

One afternoon, you open your map to be sure to go through the right place but a small rock goes through your map and makes a hole in it. First, you’re surprised, then when you’re about to look around you, you hear, “Kíli! What have you done again? Can’t you behave for one day?” Thorin shouts to his nephew as you look back to your map. Luckily, the rock made a hole in the sea and the rest of the paper wasn't damaged.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t want to pierce the map! Is it damaged? I’m sorry!” he says, riding closer in the front, with you and Thorin. “It was just a joke!” You sigh and turn back to do your job without a word while Thorin continues to reprimand him like a child.

After some ups and downs, you arrive in Rivendell. If the first time he sees you smile isn’t with two elves, Kíli would be happy to see it, but when Elladan and Elrohir find you, they welcome you so warmly that you forget almost everything you've been through. Arwen joins you too and you spend more time with them than the dwarves. He sees you smiling during the whole stay in Rivendell, and from the moment you all flee in the Misty mountains, you put on your serious face again, focused on the road.

One very cold night, Thorin decided to stop in a cave, with a small fire just to make dinner. It’s really because you owe a debt to Gandalf that you’re still with them. He is not even coming with you in the Misty Mountains’ snow! You’re within a hair's breadth of return to Rivendell, but when you see the Hobbit is still here, you can make an effort. Are you a ranger or not?

Focused on blowing on your hands to keep your warm, you startle when Kíli kneels before you and hands you a bowl of soup. “Here, it’ll warm you a little,” he says with a light smile. You’re surprised it’s not Bilbo who gives your meal as usual, even more when Kíli sits next to you with his own bowl, but you don't pay attention. A warm soup is just what you need to think about right now.

When Kíli sees you smile as you eat your bowl, he loses his words. It’s the first time you smile for him. Well, technically not for him, but thanks to him, right? Then, he realises the soup is not the only thing that warms him up.

Once you finish your soup, your hands are quickly cold and you restart blowing on it. When Kíli sees that, he removes his coat and slips it on your back. It’s too big for you and so warm. For some seconds, you beam and close the coat on you, until you notice Kíli is now in a tunic. “Are you crazy? You will catch a cold like that! Take it back!” you exclaim, losing your smile. “It takes more than that for a dwarf to get sick,” he laughs as he takes his blanket from his bed. “And I have a blanket!”

His smile and attention make you blush, so you close his coat even more on you to hide your face. But it doesn’t escape Kíli's notice. If giving you soup makes you smile and giving you a coat makes you blush, he already starts to think about all the things he could give you to see all your expressions.

Bilbo

Bilbo is a curious hobbit, so when Gandalf talks to you, he often joins him. On the road, at dinners, at breaks, …

Always riding at the front of the company, you intrigue him from the beginning. You’re very quiet compared to the dwarves. You never complain and speak only to indicate the way.

When Fíli and Kíli come to the front to talk to you, you answer vaguely, even when they make jokes.

One evening you all rest in an inn in a small town, you join Gandalf and Bilbo for dinner. A waitress finds you and serves you the meal you ordered. Bilbo notices your smile at the view of the warm dinner while they are also waiting for theirs. Something in his heart warms him up, but he doesn’t know if it’s because of the view of the meal or your smile. He tries to forget it when his meal comes.

During that very dinner, you couldn’t decide on the meal to order, so you ask Bilbo if you can taste his meal. He looks surprised by your request but lets you do it. Oh, his meat pie is as good as your roast pork!

As Bilbo prefers staying with you in each town the company passes or rests, you often share a meal with him, and your love for good food makes you want to try as many dishes as possible. One day, you meet a friend in a new town. A childhood ranger friend. Everyone is surprised when you call him. He runs to you and hugs you with all the strength he has. Your laugh echoes for so long that the dwarves go back to their business.

But not Bilbo. He stays with you and you introduce him to your friend. The three of you end up dinner together in the town’s inn. After they bring your meals, you taste yours, then the one of Bilbo like you used to. Your friend ordered the same as you.

“Y/n?” he asks you, wincing. “It’s me,” you reply, your head still leaning on your plate. “Tell me you know what it means to share a meal like this with a hobbit.”

You shrug, continuing to eat. You don’t see Bilbo blushing and finishing his meal quickly. The silence makes you raise your head. Your friend is smiling, and Bilbo seems trying to say something but he stammers, “I. Well. You. Well.”

“Wait, it means something?” you finally ask, putting your fork and knife on the table. Your friend sighs. You’ve never been interested in Hobbits before, but you know your friend used to watch their lands for years. “It’s a courting thing, or for married ones,” he eventually laughs.

“What? But nobody told me! Either Gandalf, or even Bilbo! Hey Bilbo, why didn't you ever tell me?” you ask as he stammers some words about some things he has to do, and leaves you.

Oh. So, your friend is right.

Bilbo avoids you since then, and you’re too focused to do your job to speak with him. Well, in truth, you try to stay focused but when you notice you made a mistake, turning at the wrong path, you’re so embarrassed that you spend your day apologising to Thorin. “Don’t worry, lass, mistakes happen,” Balin tells you the night of the incident with a comforting smile.

You feel so stupid that you isolate yourself behind a rock to avoid Thorin’s look. At some point, you hear steps toward you and eventually see Bilbo. He stops in front of you with a bowl of Bombur’s stew.

“Can I sit next to you?” he asks. It’s the first time he has spoken to you since he ran away. You nod and take the bowl. You finally talk both of you like you used to until you search in your bag and get out a cookie.

“Will you share it with me?” you ask as you cut the cookie in half. “Y-you’re sure?” he asks as he is about to take half of the cookie you hand him. “I’m sure,” you say with the first smile of your day. Then Bilbo realises he missed your smile more than he thought. But when you eat your piece of cookie, he understands how much more he missed your smile when you were eating. Luckily for him, he has some food in his bag waiting to share with you.

#the hobbit fanfic #imagine #thorin #fili #bilbo #thorin x reader #fili x reader #kili x reader #bilbo x reader #fluff

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autumnmobile12 · 5 months

Text

I’m hoping that as Nocturne continues, that there might be some eventual parallels between Alucard and Richter.

I’ve mentioned in another post I don’t really like Richter. I’m not going to reiterate the entire thing, but the long and short of it is I found his character unnecessarily mean-spirited. Some of his dialogue really rubbed me the wrong way and I didn’t find his lines all that funny. But it’s this specific line to Tera that sealed the deal with me disliking him.

“And you just happened to stumble upon it one day while you were out picking flowers?”

Um, what the fuck? She raised you, gave you a safe place to grow up, has been a surrogate mother to you, and has shown you nothing but kindness and support, and you’re going to talk to her like that? What an asshole.

And this is the difference between Richter and Trevor’s characters. Trevor is an asshole, but did he ever talk to Sypha or her grandfather this way? No. Did he talk to Alucard this way? Well…yeah, but also observe Alucard also woke up snarky and began insulting him from minute one, so we can argue they are delightfully matching each other’s energy with a vengeance.

But I’m not gonna lie…for the first two seasons, I also didn’t like Alucard’s character all that much and for the same reasons. I’m a little biased as I generally don't like protagonists who are just mean for no reason. We all know someone like that in real life, whether they’re a relative or a co-worker or a boss, so why deal with it in fiction? Okay yeah, I get that it’s often part of a character arc and symbolism for growth and finding maturity. I understand why storylines like this are necessary, but I’m still gonna hate the little shits for the duration they’re assholes.

So Alucard…the way he treats Trevor in the first two seasons is also pretty crappy behavior.

“I imagine one sacrifices a chicken, and divines the location of the book you want from the intestines. Maybe Belmont has a crystal ball in here you could ask. …. Your ancestors were apparently mentally ill hoarders. I fully expect to find family cats mummified under some of these shelves. Unless your family preferred to eat them.”

You’re gonna talk to your comrade like that…in his own home…where his entire family was brutally slaughtered by a mob....possibly right in front of him? Yeah, real charming, Alucard. And this is the tone for his character in the beginning. There is the point where Sypha calls him out and tells him to stop testing Trevor, but I think there’s another element at play. “…and he’s a drunk and he’s self-destructive and anyone trying to hold on to him may as well be dragged down with him.” He isn’t just testing him, he’s judging him and he’s already decided he’s a useless drunk who got lucky and happened to win a few fights.

All right, now that I’ve dragged him through the mud, I’m going to pull back and assess the wider perspective of Alucard’s full character arc. Alucard’s growth follows the line of the spoiled brat who experienced hardship and had to grow up because of it. I think Alucard lived a very sheltered life before his mother died, and his actions and dialogue in the Belmont Hold are the strongest indicator to this. We clearly see he’s disgusted by the trophies and the history of murder against the vampires, and he is not shy about voicing his contempt towards the family’s entire purpose. He’s right, though. With the presence of the infant skull in the display case, we do get the very subtle nod that the Belmonts, for all their claims of virtue and protecting humanity, have also committed atrocities. He does have a right to his anger against Trevor and his family.

But what’s absent from Alucard’s character here is the fact he doesn’t seem to consider the atrocities the vampires have committed against his mother’s people. To the vampires, humans are food, livestock, and a lesser species. Godbrand brutally murders several humans in his flashback with no clear intent on actually eating them, so he kills for sport. Cho torments the humans in her court by amusing herself with duels to the death that only she can win. Not a humane way to treat the vampire equivalent of livestock. And exactly how long does Erzsebet Báthory keep those girls chained up while she drains them of blood?

Why does Alucard condone what the vampires do to humans and at the same time condemns the Belmonts for hunting the vampires?

The answer: I don’t think he did because I don’t think he was fully aware of these scenarios. Think about it, he had no knowledge of Dracula’s Generals and the only thing he talked about regarding his father was the tragedy of his madness and how killing him would be destroying centuries of knowledge. I think Dracula wanted him to have a peaceful life and fed him the more rosy-colored version of their history. Maybe he intended to tell him one day, and that day kept being put off by the sentiment, “He’s a boy. Let him continue to be a boy.”

Alucard lives his peaceful childhood until it comes to a screeching halt when Lisa is killed, so I honestly think there is an innocence behind his upbringing that gave him a very clear bias against the Belmonts that was completely justified in some elements and not so much in others. There’s also the point that he keeps referencing Trevor as a drunk, which is very much condescension. It’s not until Season 3, after he’s experienced his traumas and has fallen into his own slump of grief that his attitude towards Trevor changes. There’s still ribbing between the pair, but it’s not the same cutting remarks that we saw back in Season 2. Alucard walked a mile in Trevor’s shoes, and that mile was bitter.

...

So where I stand with Nocturne: Richter has started off in a way similar to Alucard. He lost his mother at a young age, but aside from that, he grew up safe and loved in a stable home, has a good relationship with Tera and Maria, and has otherwise led a relatively peaceful life. Even in the midst of the French Revolution, they don't seem like suffering peasants. Like Alucard before his world truly went to hell, Richter also didn’t have a full concept of what real hardship looks like. This is apparent when he’s all confidence and bravado, going around and yelling he’s the ‘last of the Belmonts’ and he ‘kills vampires’ and “Who’s next?” And then Olrox shows up and he cows him right back into the scared, little boy he’s pretending he’s not.

And so not only is there a parallel between Richter and Alucard, but there is also a big one between Trevor and Annette. Both of them have suffered through their own individual hardships, both losing their loved ones in some of the most brutal ways imaginable, but those same hardships gave them their pride and their poignant maturity and cynicism in how they see the world. Granted, the difference between Trevor and Annette is she never lost her purpose or her will to fight despite having been dealt the worse lot of having been born a slave, but still…Trevor never ran away from his nightmares like Richter did. Even though Annette and Trevor have their moments when they are scared, both of them stood up and said, “Fuck it, I have a bastard to kill and if I die killing them, so be it.” They don’t give an absolute damn. They took their pain and they wore it like armor.

“Killing you was the point. Living was a luxury.”

“If I let my past terrify me, I’d never be free of it.”

…

Compared to them, Richter is a spoiled brat who has yet to grow up.

And I think Alucard’s going to be right there with him saying, “Don’t worry. I was like you once and we’ll get there together.”

#castlevania #richter belmont #alucard tepes #trevor belmont #annette #castlevania netflix #castlevania nocturne #parallels #character analysis #character development

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tojiscumdumpster · 6 months

Text

CHAPTER SIX - TOJI/READER

⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀✧ summary page

Toji’s POV

“Don’t forget the parent-teacher conference today at three, then I need to go buy things for school this week.”

The hardest thing about being a parent is having to remember shit. Had Megumi not reminded me, I would’ve forgotten.

Partially because I genuinely didn’t remember, and the other reason is because Y/N has taken over my mind. It’s been like this since I’ve met her, but it definitely heightened after our morning together this past Saturday.

Accidentally seeing her naked, then dry humping her the next morning has me desperate for her pussy. I wasn’t even fucking inside of her and she had me coming in my damn boxers. I just know if her pussy was wrapped around my cock, I would’ve nutted quicker than I did.

I needed relief. Once I came back home, I fisted myself in the shower. I got out of the shower, caught up on some sleep, then woke up and jerked off again.

And again.

And again…

I never been this fucking horny before. What other woman’s name have I moaned out while beating my cock? I visualize Y/N. I visualized her on top of me, under me, on her knees for me. Fuck, the day she lets me have my way with her, I’m going to take my time to please her, but fuck her like she’s my favorite toy.

And I want to say it’s only a sexual attraction with Y/N, but I would be lying.

We agreed to get to know each other. Not boyfriend and girlfriend. Not dating. Just talking. Not as friends either because what I feel for is not friendly. She just… intrigues me.

I don’t want to say I’ll end up falling for her because that’s fucking unlikely. I don’t even have any more love left in me to give. But I know I want Y/N to myself. I want to claim her as mine.

She is mine.

The extra hour we spent together on Saturday was nice. Y/N said she was going to lunch with a friend, so we sat and ate fucking Cinnamon Toast Crunch while talking.

Imagine me, a gruff forty-two-year-old eating a bowl of sugary cereal. Kong would say I’m whipped. Probably even clown me about it.

But see, the thing is about whatever shit me, and Y/N have going on—it feels natural. She doesn’t always talk. I don’t always talk. Maybe I’ll stare at her like a creep because she’s so damn pretty but being in each other's presence is enough.

She affects me in ways I can’t describe, and it’s only been a week. And within that week, we’ve only been around each other three times.

I fucking know her. I know I do.

“Dad,” Megumi calls me. “Did you hear what I said?”

I clear my throat. “Yeah. Yeah, kid. Meeting at three, and school supplies.” I go back to fixing his lunch. “Want to go tomorrow? I’m off.”

“Why are you still packing me lunch? I’m not a little kid anymore,” he asks, annoyingly.

I throw my head back and laugh. “You rather eat that shit they serve you at school? Chocolate milk with pizza?”

His cheeks redden. “Whatever.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” I mock. “So, tomorrow?”

“Whatever.”

“ Whatever , whatever . Those the only words you know? Maybe I need to talk to your teacher about extra lessons.”

“Dad, just make my lunch. I’m going to finish getting ready.” The kid didn’t even let me get a response out before he stormed out the kitchen.

Megumi has been putting up with me these days. I’d like to describe my kid as “moody.” One minute, we’re able to hold a decent conversation. The next, he completely shuts me out and acts like I don’t exist. I don’t pressure him, though. Whatever he wants to give, I’ll take it.

Just parenting him feels like I’m parenting myself because I know I would act how he does. He’s still adjusting , that’s what Y/N would tell me if she was here right now. Her reassurance helps because when that damn voice in my head reminds me how shitty of a dad I am, I think about what she told me.

“Grand Finale takes the lead around the far turn!”

Gambling, one of the guilty pleasures I fucking suck at but still do because it’s easy money. Well, when I’m not losing it. Do I ever win? No. Though, lately, my bets haven’t been getting dirt last.

Top five is at least my goal.

The security gig pays well, but there’s nothing wrong with a little extra cash every now and then. If I’m not at races, I’m in the casino, which they have a lot of in the States. Probably my favorite thing about this country.

My chances of playing at those slot machines are definitely higher than these inconsistent races who take up a shit load of my earnings.

Before, when I was kicked out of the Zen’in Family, any penny I had I would blow on gambling. Now, I try to be mindful since I have another mouth to feed. Last thing I need is to be one of those dads that spent their life savings on some bullshit, getting nothing in return.

I don’t want to look like that now, at least.

“Pilot Apollo is coming up on the outside!”

Pilot Apollo. About fucking time. I’ve been betting on this racehorse for months. Every time he comes up on fifth place, some shithead jockey passes him, and he falls behind.

“How did I know you were going to be here?” Kong stands behind me, smoking probably his twentieth cigarette for the day.

“Maybe because you keep fucking stalking me,” I retort. “Aren’t you supposed to be back in Japan? What are you still doing here?”

He takes the seat near me, skipping a chair to keep a comfortable distance. “Bought a one-way ticket, and I didn’t even get to see my godson yet.”

“Grand Finale has passed Apollo Pilot. He’s closing in on third. Now second!”

My back straightens. “Apollo Pilot, what the fuck?”

Kong takes a puff of his cigarette, chuckling. “You know you’re not good at this crap. Easy money doesn’t suit you, Fushiguro.”

“What do you want?”

“The contract is still up for grabs. Better money. Frankly, something you’re actually good at.”

I clicked my tongue. “I remember telling you no. I don’t do shit like that anymore, Kong. You know that.”

Gambling and sleeping with random women for money was inconsistent. Gambling, because I lost money as soon as I won it, and being a boy toy because sometimes I didn’t feel like fucking married women who were unhappy with the cock they were getting at home.

Kong introduced me to a form of income that was consistent and paid very, very well.

Killing people.

Well, becoming a contract killer. Same difference.

I needed good money. Fast money. Money, I knew I could get because of my skills, no thanks but thanks to those Zen’in fucks. So, I started taking contracts here and there. One signing could last me six months if I didn’t blow it all on gambling.

But I stopped taking contracts after I met Megumi’s mother—my wife. She doesn’t even know I used to do it. Information like this stays between me and Kong.

Just thinking about Y/N’s words, saying how I’m a decent man circulated my memories. Wonder if she’d feel the same if she found out the joy I got out of those contracts.

“And besides, we’re in America now. The systems are different from back home,” I argued. “Can’t afford getting caught.”

“The contract is based in Japan.”

You don’t need that kind of money right now, Fushiguro. You and Megumi are good.

Shut up.

I raise a brow. “Why the fuck are you so adamant about me taking the contract? Trying to set me up?”

He throws up his hands, mocking me, “Damn, you got me.” This motherfucker. “No, dumbass. Because my cut is based on the performance and if the job actually gets done. I hate complimenting you, but you were a good client, Fushiguro. I like money just as much as you.”

“Apollo Pilot has fallen behind. Newbourne passes, taking fifth place. Fourth. Third! Second! Newbourne is now in second place!”

“You got to be fucking shitting me,” I say through gritted teeth.

“Grand Finale is coming up on Newbourne, who takes the lead. Neck to neck, these two!”

I stand up and curse, not caring about the looks I’m attracting. “Five hundred dollars, Apollo Pilot. Move your fucking tail. Place fifth!”

“Oh, but Newbourne is coming in strong. He’s back in the lead on the inside.”

“Fushiguro, you’re embarrassing me,” Kong snorts.

“Shut up.”

“Oh my goodness, Grand Finale with the ultimate comeback. He has striked. Ladies and gentlemen, Grand Finale has won the Wooden Star derby!”

Sixth fucking place for Apollo Pilot and five hundred dollars straight down the drain. This is what I get for trying to enjoy my afternoon. And nothing makes it better than having Kong in the background taunting me.

“Fuck you, man.” I crumbled up the betting ticket I had and threw it on the ground. It’s time for me to head home so I can get ready to go to this meeting. “And I’m not taking the contract.” I tell Kong as I walk away.

“Think about it,” he says, waving goodbye. “Oh, and I’m coming over for dinner soon.”

Reader’s POV

Okay, maybe I did take some extra time this morning to get pretty because of my three o’clock parent-teacher conference in the next ten minutes.

A fresh wash and go. One of my favorite overall dresses with a white under tee. Light yet flirty makeup. My favorite creamy vanilla and warm berries fragrance. Gosh, I feel like a high school girl getting ready to see her crush. That damn Toji Fushiguro just makes me feel so light inside.

And after Saturday, I know my vibrator is getting tired of me.

Sex didn’t happen, but the dry humping… it felt so good. How Toji was thrusting into my hips with so much passion and aggression, I shouldn’t be surprised I orgasmed off of that alone.

I mean, let’s not forget to mention how he played with my nipples… sucked on my neck… the animalistic look in his eyes. It’s been too long since I’ve felt desired that way, like a high I didn’t want to come down from.

And I know how desperately he wanted to fuck me. I did, too. Well, I do, too. But I want to talk to him more. It’s not about making him wait to see if he’s the one because words can’t describe how badly I want him.

It’s just the ball of feelings I have for him that rests in the pit of my stomach—I want them to grow organically. I want to feel him emotionally without feeling him inside of me, physically.

When the time is right.

Honestly, this past Saturday would’ve been the perfect time, but I did not have enough energy to take him. Not with his size.

Breathe, Y/N.

I also can’t help but feel that I’m feeling for Toji too fast. With the little conversation we had, and the short time I’ve known him for, I might be a bit ahead of myself. We don’t know each other, is what he said to me last Friday.

… It’s the truth I didn’t want to hear.

Yes, it’s true. But I won’t hold back how I feel, and what I feel around Toji Fushiguro is just a like.

It’s a quick job, then I’ll come back to you. . . He said he’s not coming.

These words have been replaying in my mind lately. Is my conscience trying to tell me something? Who’s not coming? Is it…

A knock on my classroom door reminds me of my reality. I look to see the man that has been constantly on my mind lately, lips curving into a small smile.

Realistically speaking, my reactions are first to be giddy and excited to see him, but I keep that inside. Right now, it’s teacher mode.

I walked to the door and let him in. First thing I picked up was his scent. Earthy and woody with a touch of amber. He’s wearing his all black, three-piece suit that I saw him wearing at work. His midnight-colored locks are slicked back, different from his usual style that I know him for.

It might be an over exaggeration, but Toji Fushiguro is probably the sexiest man I’ve ever laid eyes on.

Masculine. Mature. Rough. His body, that waist that’s accentuated by his suit. . . Fuck me.

Calm down, Y/N .

I know, I know.

“Y/N?”

I give him a teasing smile. “Miss L /N,” I corrected. “It’s nice to see you again, Mr. Fushiguro. Please. Come take a se-” My words were cut off by Toji grabbing me by my waist from behind to pull me into him.

His lips are at my neck, and I can feel him smiling while softly kissing my skin. I have the urge to melt but I fight it.

“Toji, not here. I’m at work.”

He deeply inhales and pleasurably exhales. “You smell so good. You always do. And you look pretty, sweetheart.”

“Thank you.” I want to stay like this. I really do, but the last thing I need is to have someone catch us like this. “But move. We have a parent-teacher conference.”

He chuckles, eventually releasing me. “Fine. Just surprised you’re Miss L /N. I think you failed to tell me that this past Saturday.”

“Maybe I like surprises?”

“Ha, a surprise it is. Megumi has told me about you.”

I sit behind my desk and Toji takes a seat in front of me. “Good things, I hope.”

“Seems like you’re his favorite teacher. I asked Megumi how his teachers are, he gave an eh response, but said you were pretty nice.”

Being a teacher isn’t easy, and the pay isn’t great. However, I do it because I genuinely enjoy teaching. Hearing reassurance from my students, no matter how big or small, feels good.

“Megumi is a good student,” I start. “He’s only been here a week, but volunteers reading quicker than newer and even seasoned students. Sometimes he seems shy because of his English, but I try to help him with the little Japanese I know.”

“How’d you learn?”

“When I taught elementary kids, it was for like three years in Japan. I was their English teacher,” I explained. “Also, uhm, my ex-fiancé… he’s Japanese, too.”

He hums, and if I didn’t know any better, I saw his jaw tick. “I see. Well, yeah. He likes reading. The kid has a lot of books. I think it helps with his English, too. We jump between Japanese and English at home.”

“I think that's good practice.”

“Does Megumi have friends?”

I tap my pen against the desk, thinking. “Throughout the school, I’m not sure, but I did sit him next to another student I think he would pair well with. His name is Yuji. Really sweet and bubbly kid. He’s also Japanese, so I think he warms up to him a bit because of that connection.”

“That kid is stubborn like his old man,” he teases. “I tell him to make friends and he says he doesn’t need any. I don’t want him to end up like me.”

My face softens. “Be kind to yourself, Toji.”

So much for teacher mode.

Our eyes are on each other, and he knows exactly how I'm feeling. Little by little, Toji opens up about his relationship with his son. We talked about it a bit on Saturday.

I can tell he’s not the kind of man that shows his emotions, but I can feel his energy. How he talked about Megumi holding small conversations with him lately seemed to make him happy. Toji told me there was one point in their lives after his wife died that Megumi didn’t talk to him for a whole year.

I could only imagine the strain their relationship has.

I’m not condoning him being a neglectful father for seven years, but I’m not going to diminish his grief either. It’s just when you’re a parent, there’s times you have to put on a facade and put your feelings on the back burner to make sure your kids are alright.

Toji’s trying to make amends now, and I’m glad he didn’t wait until Megumi was old enough to completely resent him. His patient is amicable.

He gives me a wryly smile. “I’ll keep that in mind. . . Miss L /N.”

“Someone has to keep the foreplay going.”

He arches a brow, standing over my desk to brush his lips against mine. “That’s what this is to you? Foreplay?”

Toji’s minty breath and soft pink lips are making it hard for me to not jump on him and be clingy. Again, classroom setting. Can’t afford to get caught.

Alternating my gaze between his lips and rich eyes, I look at him through my lashes, smiling and say, “Back to our discussion at hand, Mr. Fushiguro?”

He laughs quietly. “Of course.”

I try to keep the conference quick and simple (since Toji has work at four), going over the class curriculum, the expectation of Megumi, and all the supplies he needs throughout the school year. With a bit of flirting here and there, seeing how involved he wants to be in his son's school life really warms me.

Unfortunately, not all student’s parents are like that. Hence why a lot of my conferences last fifteen minutes or less.

“This is the parent portal you can download on your phone as an app, mobile web, or access on a computer to keep up with Megumi’s grades. Not only in my class, but his other classes.”

“What’s his grade now?” he asks.

“Since he’s new to my class, there’s not much to grade, so you’ll see it as blank,” I answered him. “Next week we have a test on a book we’re finishing up in class. That’ll be his first major grade.”

He nods. “Alright. Anything else I need to know?” Toji asks with genuine concern. Not like a man that has somewhere to be, even though he does.

“It’s four fifteen.”

“Not worrying about work. They know I’m going to be late.”

I softly smile. “Okay, but no. Nothing else. Any updates will be posted on the parent portal. My email and number are within that folder as well.” We began walking to the door so I could see him out.

“Can I use your number outside school reasons?”

“Use my number however you please, Mr. Fushiguro.” My voice is suggestive. I find Toji rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek while smiling, incredibly sexy. It’s like he’s doing this on purpose.

“Going to let me kiss you now?”

I managed to look over his shoulders to see if there’s anyone walking through the hallway but it’s empty. “A quick one and make it appropr-” A good way to shut me up.

His lips are on mine before I’m able to finish, kissing me like he’s been without me for a lifetime. Kissing Toji is addicting but makes me feel like I’m on a cloud. How he nibbles on my bottom lip or sucks my tongue into his mouth.

His hand that rests on the small of my back that feels possessive, pulling me further so I don’t break away. How he groans when tasting my mouth because us kissing has just as much of an effect on him as it does me.

The words that he says. The look in his eyes when he watches me. How his touch burns sensuality and temptation onto my flesh. My friends always told me I’m a lovesick fool, and Toji Fushiguro will be the one to show it if this keeps up.

“You look pretty like this,” —he breathes after breaking our kiss— “and you expecting me to keep it appropriate?”

“I wanted to look nice for you,” I admit, shyly.

“For me?”

I nod. “Yeah.”

“If only you knew,”—his hand slides to my ass to squeeze, pulling me further into his now hardened erection—“how fucking beautiful and enticing you are.”

I have times where I’m the most confident woman in the world. Then, I also have times where I can show a bit of insecurity. But I don’t show that side to everyone. Probably no one. However, Toji is just that exception.

Tucking my coils behind my ears, I say, “You’re just saying that.”

He grabs me by my chin with his free hand to force me to look at him. “I’m not.” Is all he says, sounding more certain and genuine than ever.

“Okay,” I responded, holding eye contact. “Thank you.”

He looks at his watch, time being four thirty. “Can I take you out?”

“Hm, I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to go out with my student’s father. No?”

Toji repeatedly pecks my lips. “I work day shift on Friday. I’ll see you at eight?”

My crush on this man almost frightens me.

“Yeah. Friday at eight,” I confirm.

“Alright. I have to go. Okay for me to text you later?”

“Remember, Mr. Fushiguro” –I tiptoe to give him one more kiss– “use my number as you please.”

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discussion question #2 — reader knew that toji is megumi's father before toji found out that she's megumi's reading teacher. now that toji knows, do you think him seeing reader will cause a rift in his already strained relationship with megumi once he finds out? Or maybe cause them to grow closer? What are your thoughts?

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