#me and min share a lot of soft quiet moments when its the two of us

[1980ssunflower]

My baby dumpling 💙✨

[sturnsbaebackup]

IS IT OVER NOW? - MATT STURNIOLO (PART TWO)

i highly recommend reading part one before you read this, which is linked here!

summary: after seeing matt at the party and admitting you still have feelings for him, things aren’t so radio silent between you two anymore.

warnings: not proof read lolll sorry if there’s typos 😛

—

immediately after the party, a week went by of still no contact from matt after your heated encounter with him.

at that party a few weeks ago, you spat out plenty of angry words at him and he did the same to you, which had been keeping you both up at night. both of you wishing you could take the entire situation back. you and matt just wanted each other, but neither of you knew how to break the silence. that was until matt decided to text you last week, asking if you wanted to go for a drive.

…

you hear your phone buzz as you begin to start falling asleep, and you groan in annoyance. you roll over in your bed and grab your phone off of the charger. your eyes nearly bulge out of your head as you see the familiar contact photo appear on your lock screen.

“what the fuck?” you blurt out, immediately sitting upright in your bed and opening his text.

matt | can i come pick you up in like 10 mins? i’m in the car and im not too far from you. we gotta talk

read 12:24 am

you take your sweet time rereading the text to make sure you’re not dreaming. it’s been pure radio silence from matt since the party, and the first thing he texts you is that?!

matt | you have your read receipts on yk

read 12:26 am

“oh fuck,” you mumble, immediately starting to type out a response. your hands are trembling a little due to all of the adrenaline coursing through your veins.

you | oops sorry but yeah ofc just text me when you’re here

he reacts to the message with a thumbs up, and you immediately bolt out of bed. you curl your eyelashes quickly and add a little bit of blush on your cheeks and nose. he knows you were about to sleep, so there’s no point in putting on obvious makeup. you grab a random hoodie from your closet and throw on some slippers. you look homeless, but who cares. it’s just matt.

that’s what you keep repeating in your head to yourself in an attempt to calm the nerves that are practically doing somersaults in your stomach.

it’s just matt. it’s just matt. its just matt. nothing to be scared of. it’s just matt.

your thoughts are broken up when your phone dings with the message of matt letting you know he’s waiting in the car outside. you exhale deeply as you lock the door behind you, shivering in the cold, late night, los angeles air. muffled music can be heard from the outside of matt’s car, and his eyes are glued to his phone. he’s just as nervous as you are, maybe even more.

your hand wraps around the door handle, and you pull it gently in an attempt to not frighten matt. his eyes look up at you and lock with yours, making your heart skip a beat.

“hi matt,” you say awkwardly as you sit in his passenger seat.

“y/n, hi,” he smiles softly, beginning to put the car in drive. you keep your eyes down at your feet as the car begins to drive away, the silence killing you internally. in previous moments like this, you both would be fighting over aux not even a minute into the car ride, but this time it’s dead silent with quiet music playing in the back.

“so, you wanted to talk?” you blurt out, your mouth moving faster than your brain.

“yeah, but i was hoping maybe we could get some mc donald’s before we have the serious conversation? you know, like old times,” he says, reminding you of the times where after a bad fight you guys would talk things out in a parking lot over a shared mcflurry and fries.

you let out a soft chuckle, “yeah okay, sounds perfect.” the silence isn’t as awkward as before, but the tension is so tense you genuinely could cut it with a knife. your thumbs fiddle in the front pocket of your sweatshirt as you wait for the traffic light to change, the mcdonald’s drive thru being at the other end of the intersection.

“can i get two oreo mcflurrys and a large fry?” matt asks the lady working the drive thru. she calculates the total and you immediately reach for your wallet to grab your card, but matt quickly stops you.

his hand now rests on your forearm, “no y/n. let me pay, i’m the one who dragged you out so late,” he smiles softly. when he notices his hand on your arm he quickly takes it off, making your heart sink a little. ‘things aren’t how they used to be, we aren’t dating, and you need to realize that,’ you mentally tell yourself.

eventually you guys get your food and pull into the far back corner of the parking lot. it’s very dimly lit but the flickering florescent street light that’s shining on matt is making the dark bags under his eyes extremely visible. you’re quick to notice them, and you instantly know he hasn’t been getting much sleep at all, and you have a guess that the reason is what he’s about to talk to you about.

he unbuckles the seatbelt and rotates in his seat, resting his back against his door facing you. “so… first of all how’ve you been?”

you pick up a fry from the bag that rests on the center console, letting it cool off between your fingers as you speak up. “i’ve been uh— you know. just living, i guess. how have you been?” you shrug, putting the fry in your mouth.

“not good, honestly. that’s why i texted you,” matt admits, looking down at his thumbs that reside in his lap. your heart drops at his statement and an overwhelming feeling of sadness rushes over you. if you and matt were still dating, you would be pulling him in a tight hug and holding his head against your chest. but you can’t do that, so you just sit and looking at him.

“what?” you ask, hoping you heard him wrong.

“i haven’t been getting much sleep. like, at all. i really miss you, and i fucked up at that party. i never should’ve been trying to make you jealous with her. that wasn’t fair to either of you, and your words keep playing through my mind every night. it keeps me up at night.”

you take a moment to process what you’re hearing, and sigh. “matt come here,” you say, putting your mcflurry down into the cupholder and leaning over the center console to hug matt. he looks up at you with sad eyes, confused at what you’re about to do, but as soon as he realizes, he immediately hugs you back.

you pull his head into your chest and rest your hand over his left cheek, making sure to hold him as close as possible. you press gentle kisses on the top of his head as your fingers play with the ends of his hair.

“i miss you, y/n. i love you so much and i’m so sorry i thought we needed space, i was so unbelievably wrong. i was just going through a weird phase for like a month and shoved you away, but i really think you’re the only person who can calm me down. you bring me back to earth, y/n,” matt mumbles against your chest.

“shh matty, it’s okay. we don’t need to talk about it yet, let’s just enjoy the moment,” you mutter into his hair softly. eventually you and matt break the hug and continue to catch up on everything you guys have missed in each others lives within the last few weeks.

“speaking of clothing— is that my hoodie?” matt asks you, sidetracking from your conversation.

you look down at the gray nike sweatshirt that rests on your body, and your cheeks flare up with heat. “oh my god! that’s so embarrassing, i had no idea this was yours. i just grabbed the first hoodie i could find. i swear i thought i gave this back to you,” you blush.

matt chuckles, “keep it. it looks cute on you. plus, you’re just gonna end up stealing all of the hoodies you gave back to me.”

“you know me so well,” you laugh as you throw a fry at matt.

“hey watch it! i just got the car cleaned!”

[gold-daegu]

yellow paint | ending two

yellow paint ending one | [prev] | [next] | [masterlist]

synopsis ; Minho has been by Y/n’s side since 3rd grade, making sure she doesn’t get herself into any trouble. But it seems like someone else wants to be by Y/n’s side too. Will he bite back his worries and tell you how he feels? Or will he watch as you fall for someone else?

pairing ; minho x fem!reader, chan x fem!reader

a/n ; omggggg it's the end guys and i'm even letting you choose how it goes lmao. I had a lot of fun with this considering this is the first fic i've written for skz. anyway let's get on with it

genre ; fluff, angst,

college!au, sm!au

writing below ;

You hadn't stopped thinking about what Seungmin had said earlier. It's been nagging at you since you left your apartment, as you walked through campus to get to the dance room.

"I saw him giving her a piggyback ride earlier..."

Your hopes were high at La La's, seeing Minho act in such a way made your heart do a full gymnast routine. You were so sure he felt the same at that moment. He said he was jealous of your time with Chan, and logically you know that the chance of him seeing you as more than a friend is high. However, you still have a hard time admitting that to yourself.

Your heart swelled, eager to just come out and say it. You had to tell Minho how you felt before Bong Gi did.

Bong Gi...

Were you a bad friend for confessing to Minho? You knew she had taken a liking to him over the past month or so, but you really couldn't help it. It took her saying it outright for you to finally take your own feelings into account. As terrible as it felt, you just had to let him know.

You could hear the heavy bass beating through the building. Minho always turns his music up way too loud. You couldn't help the smile that found its place on your lips, pulling the door back and slipping in to see him hard at work.

He was wearing dark clothes, a smart choice considering how much he has to be sweating. He moved beautifully to the beat, finding the pockets in the rhythm like it was simply second nature-- which it was sure to be by now.

He wasn't fazed by the door creaking open and slamming closed behind you, a result of the loud music. He was mesmerizing. You don't know if you had ever really sat and watched Minho dance. You're not sure how he's able to take a song and find out which move fits where, it seems unreal.

He caught sight of you in the mirror and stopped suddenly, going to switch the music off. As the room drowned in the silence, he smiled lightly and shook the hair out of his eyes.

"Didn't know you'd be stopping by, what's the occasion?" He joked, grabbing a towel and wiping the sweat from his face and hair.

You hummed and nodded your head toward him, "Well I tried texting you but you didn't answer so, I figured I'd see what's got you so wrapped up."

He shrugged and moved over to your spot near the wall, sliding down to sit as he looked up at you, "My phone died a little bit ago, sorry"

You sighed and leaned over to give him his water bottle that sat a little ways away, sliding down the wall beside him. You both sat quietly as he caught his breath, his eyelashes fluttering as he fought the fatigue that hit him.

You giggled at this and nudged your shoulder against his, "You're so cute when you're fighting sleep"

It took him a moment to process your words, but his head turned so fast you thought his neck would snap. If he was tired, he felt wide awake now.

He said nothing as he stared, almost urging you to go on.

You looked down and played with your fingers, overly aware of the stare that burned into the side of your face.

"Min," you sighed, "I've been thinking a lot about how close we are. I mean, you're my best friend but... I'm terrified."

He turned his head in confusion, "Uh, why?"

You snorted, "Because when you left with Bong Gi so suddenly, it hit me that I don't want you to look at anyone else-- god that sounds lame."

You huffed, "What I mean to say is that, goddammit-- I'm in love with you, and if you don't feel the same then--"

He interrupted you in the most cheesy and cliche way, with a kiss. But you weren't one to complain. His lips were soft and salty, plump from all the biting he'd been doing during practice.

You reached up to wrap a hand behind his neck. fingers curling around his damp hair. He hovered over you now, one hand supporting himself and the other cupping your cheek and deepening the kiss.

"You talk way too much sometimes~" He breathed before diving back in.

You hummed in delight and tug him back on the floor with you, his body fully over you as you kissed, his mouth moving to your jaw and up to your ear, nibbling and eliciting a soft sigh from you.

He chuckled and trailed a hand down your sides, feeling every curve and humming in approval. He hovered over your lips, teasing another kiss, "I've waited so long to do this" he breathed out, capturing your lips roughly.

Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist and pulled him close, a growl coming from him as you did so.

He wasn't able to do anything more though, Felix and Hyunjin tumbled through the door, laughing at who knows what.

They paused, locking eyes with the glare Minho sent back. They were frozen in place, lacing from you on the floor, to your legs, to their hyung who leaned over you.

oh

They grew Cheshire cat grins and giggled to one another, Hyunjin a little more nervous than Felix as he could tell Minho was on the verge of a double homicide.

"Get out"

The two backed away slowly, moving out the door with pink ears and a silent threat from Minho to keep quiet about this. With one loud clang, the mood was gone and you were both flustered.

However, the grins you two shared showed promise of more moments like these in the future... minus the interruptions.

[kookiessugababy]

Sweet Revenge (min yoongi) (updated)

Scenario- a quiet night in blown by Yoongis deafening jealousy

Warnings🚨- jealousy// hickies// pet names// one shot

Hope you enjoy <3

******************************************************

You stumbled to the door of the boys apartment to hear the muffled chatter of them all through the door- your hand reaching into your pocket to retrieve your keys. Your feet felt light and your head dizzy, nothing making quite as much sense as you’d like, which was made greatly obvious as you fell into the heavy door as you entered. The room was softly lit in an orange light, and the floor was scattered with pizza boxes and share bags of confectionary, ruining the usual modern cleanliness of the decor. The seven boys were sat on the floor, some on the sofa, joking amongst themselves in their usual manner, cans of alcohol in hands. You loved spending time with them and they had been so welcoming ever since Namjoon had introduced you, encouraging you to spent most of your nights in their spare guest room which they had decorated with dusky pink and grey- a surprise for your previous birthday.

They hushed as you stumbled through the doorframe, your dress spilling from your shoulders and riding up your legs. You could barely work out their faces until Joonie approached you, wrapping his arms around you and holding you close. He always got concerned after you had been out, especially if he didn’t know who you were with. The night always ended with him having to care for you and despite your feelings of nausea, you embraced your best friend who was stroking your hair softly. “y/n you must stop going out partying you silly thing” Joon softly lectured, in an attempt to be polite. You shook your head and giggled as he pulled you back, readjusting the straps on your dress to maintain your modesty. He laughed a little and shook his head; “Get changed and come sober up. There’s some pizza for you, idiot.” You heard Junkook shuffle towards the two of you, and in his plate was a cold slice that looked somewhat miserable upon a creased paper plate they had set aside for your return, leaving it on the coffee table by your legs.

The cool water felt divine as it hit your face, slightly dampening the ends of your hair as they fell at your shoulders. You stared at your reflection as the water fell from the faucet, eyes still slightly hazy. “Y/n please hurry, I’m dying for the bathroom” Hoseok yelled from the other side of the door, the handle jutting as he pulled to get in. You sighed, opening the door to him smiling in relief. “I was starting to think you’d flushed yourself away. Aren’t those my shorts?” he joked, giving you the right to roll your eyes at his attempt to wind you up. “We’re waiting for you! We were going to play cards against humanity” he announced, before pushing passed you to firmly lock the door behind you.

An hour later you found yourself wrapped in a fluffy blanket between Taehyung and Jimin, your head on Jimin’s lap as the rest of the members sat around in a questionable circle. You had begun to sober up- still remaining tipsy but you now matched the state of the others, who were endorsed in the rude card game being played. It made little to no sense, with fits of giggles erupting every few seconds over minor occurrences, but the atmosphere was comfortable. You’d talked a lot with Jimin tonight, who you knew very little compared got the rest of the boys considering how long it had been since Namjoon had introduced you. He had a lovely nature about him and you couldn’t stop thinking about how he looked down on you when you spoke, as if he was carefully reading you, or prompting you to speak more. Your hair was tangled between his fingers mindlessly as he laughed with the others, before reaching your shoulder and rubbing it lightly. Your eyes were groggy and your body relaxed- all stressors in your body alleviated as you sank further into his leg. A low chuckle led from his parted lips as he smiled at you. “Comfortable?” he taunted as the others laughed, your eyes closing as you nodded softly. You found yourself drifting to a light slumber as he comforted you, the muffled dialogue a slight hum as you slowly slipped out of consciousness.

You were rudely awoken twenty minutes later to a prodded shoulder, Jin leaning over you and Jimin, his hair falling close to your face as you slowly opened your eyes. “We’re heading to bed, y/n, so you should too” he whispered, showing a caring smile as you raised gently by the arm from the other boys lap. You were greeted with a hug and a peck on the forehead from Jimin once you had both made your way to the corridor, before leaving to his room. The hallway was unnervingly silent, the empty walkway shouting as your toes hit the floorboards, trying to silently make your way through to the spare room. Raising your hand out of your sleeve, the cold handle was just about in your grip but before you could swing it open, a large hand grabbed your wrist, another on your waist.

You craned your neck to find yourself faced with a dark silhouette, the little light reflecting off familiar silver strands of hair. “Yoongi?” you choked out, shocked by his sudden appearance. You’d spent little to no time with him tonight, and you were now worried that this had upset him. His brow was furrowed, face serious, frustrated and vengeful. You could see the shape of his tongue pressing against his cheek as he peered down on you, eyes running up and down your figure in a way they hadn’t before. It seemed more desperate. A silk dressing gown hid little, as you sported some comfy sleeping shorts and a small cami vest, in which he seemed amused by to your confusion. Yoongi was one of your closest friends out of the group, with many finding your relationship as flirty and slightly over the top, but you were both very confident around one another so neither would want it any other way- but this behaviour from him was not normal and his tightening grasp startled you. “Can I talk to you, y/n?” and despite the questioning nature, it felt a demand as he pulled you into the room, pushing you against the wall. He waited in silence until the door softly closed itself; meanwhile you focused on silencing your breathing and hoping your heart was not to come out of your throat.

You stumbled as your back pressed to the cold, your gown dropping to your shoulders as you desperately searched for words. “Yoongi what is wrong? What are you doing?” you demanded, his stare growing harsh as his index finger tilted your chin to meet his gaze. His eyes were dark and illuminated by the weak glare of the lampshade, his soft lips now pursed. The yellow beam exaggerated his sharp features, his jaw clenched. You couldn’t help but admire how he looked at that moment, almost forgetting his hands hanging to your wrist. He seemed to inhale through his teeth as he watched your confused features relax, but seemed pleased with your little resentment to his restraint. “What was that? With Jimin? Why did he look at you like that?” his voice remained stern and low, spitting with jealousy. After months of assuming Yoongi was simply protective of you, you questioned the possibility of him possibly being envious of people you had encountered and brung to the apartment- but surely he would have made it more obvious? Acted upon it sooner? You couldnt help but to quietly question him, your voice low as you searched for answers. “Min Yoongie, are you jealous?” you taunted, raising your eyebrow. However, the usual playful reply was met with a tighter grip on your wrists, heating up your cheeks as he shifted closer, noses touching. “Don’t play with me, y/n. Bratty girls don’t get anywhere in life.” Something shifted in your stomach as your eyes moved to his leg, which was inches from being between your thighs. You were confused and slightly taken aback by his harshness, but you could feel your face blushing as he stared directly at you. His arms pulled yours up above your head, leaving you feeling exposed, and despite the strangeness of it all, something felt right. “Y/n, you can’t be like this. You know you can’t. Flirting with the boys and making me stare at your pretty face while they get to touch you. Do you not think I find it hard enough seeing you wander in and out meeting other men? Bringing them to your room? I’ve heard you gloat to Namjoon about your dates, and all the boys who want you so bad. Don’t you think I want you bad, y/n? Jimin couldn’t touch you the way I could if you let me.” Your eyes were wide, your lashes brushing your face as your lips parted- almost in a state of shock. You had, undoubtedly, thought of Yoongi like this before, however you never would had even thought he felt the same. It almost made some sense as you tried to pull the pieces together, but very little of you could hold concentration as you felt his lips brush against yours. The tension was sliced with a heated kiss, his lips soft and hungry for yours. His tongue made its way to your mouth, his hands exploring your waist and running to your breast. The cold shock of his rings hugging his fingers felt like a knife against the warmth of your skin, core tightening as he pushed his knee to where you needed it most. You attempted to push your body down to it as your breathing hitched between messy kisses, lightly grinding against his clothed leg, your shorts separating you further.

“Stop” he commanded, pulling his leg away. His bulge was obvious as you glanced down to his grey joggers, a pain running through your core as you yearned for a touch. You felt yourself grow wet under his touch, his stare enticing you. His eyes wandered past your features, taking in your body and how weak you looked under him. He pushed the gown that sat upon your shoulders onto the floor, carefully watching you as if he was going to miss something if he looked away. He groaned as he took in your figure, his hands running and teasing your curves. “You’re so fucking pretty, kitten”, he hummed, tangling your hair between his fingers. You took a deep breath as he pushed his buldge towards your clothes heat, touching ever so lightly against you, whining as you felt yourself grow needy. “M-min Yoongie” you whined, as he tugged your hair softly, moving your face so he could plant his lips against your collar bones, marking your neck with deep purple and red. “Baby, what I would do right now to fuck you senseless is unimaginable. You do not know how long I’ve wanted you” He traced his arms down your tummy to your shorts, where he tugged the string lightly to ask you permission. You pushed your hips forward, nodding as he pulled them down your legs painfully slow. Kicking them to the side, he knelt between your legs, his breath hot against your thighs. “I need you Yoongi. I really need you” you plead, your underwear growing uncomfortable as the fabric clung to you, damp. “Oh kitten I know but you were naughty. Jimin wants his cock all up in your pretty mouth now and you don’t know where you belong.” His finger ran over your covered slit, his finger glistening with your arousal as you whined, pleading for more. “Yoongi no I want you now!” You demanded. However, a frown met his face. He ripped your underwear from you, before undressing you completely. He stood over you, completely clothed, his arm holding him up against the wall as searched your bare body. “Beg for me baby. Tell me who’s little slut you are” he whispered in your ear, nibbling it lightly. You felt euphoric and weak- surging feelings you never felt before, stomach clenching as you stood for him, exposed. “Yoongi please I’m all yours. I need you. Please Yoongi I really need you” you whined, a smirk plastering his face in satisfaction.

His face met your now dripping heat, tongue softly reaching for your clit. He licked up your thighs, massaging them with his palms as your legs buckled under his touch. He sucked your clit harshly, the swelling from arousal finally replaced by his lips. You gasped in shock as his fingers made their way up towards your heat. You felt the tip of his middle finger tease your hole, running patterns as he continued to pay attention to your clit, teeth regularly nibbling lightly, causing a strange but pleasurable discomfort that was met by soft kitten licks. Without warning, he pushed two of his long fingers inside of you, pulsing in and out of you. Air was pushed out from you as you tried to keep up with the fast pace, whining and moaning while he continued to kiss your clit. “That’s it babygirl. Let them hear your pretty noises for me.” Yoongi mumbled against you, continuing to pay you his full attention. You lower stomach tightened and your heat began to ache, clenching his fingers. At this point, he continued at his pace, slapping your other thigh with his spare hand. Your legs began to shake ever so slightly and you could not hold yourself for any longer. “C-cum Yoongi. I need to cum.” you cried, wincing as the contact between you both was cut short as he pulled away right before your climax. Your jaw dropped as your pussy dripped, marking your thighs as you watched him move away from your heat. His hair was tousled and messy from your grip, lips glossy with your arousal- glistening as he smirked. “Kitten, do you really think I’d let you finish?” He sniggered, kissing your forehead lightly. You were lost for words as the pain between your thighs only got worse, whining for more attention. Yoongi looked at you pitifully, before smiling, bringing you close as he held you up from your shaking frame. “You have to earn it baby. I only let my slut cum when she knows she’s mine, and knows that she cannot flirt with others” he grinned, pulling off his shirt and pulling it over your shoulders. “I- Yoongi please don’t go!” You pleaded, your small hands grasping his waistband, his precum having ruined his joggers. You were warm and sweaty, thighs and neck bruised with his hickeys- claiming your body and marking it his own. His shirt hung off you, exposing every mark he left, the soft fabric stained with his sweet smell. He shook his head calmly, as if he had planned this all too well. His hand reached for the door as he pressed his lips against your lips softly- “goodnight my angel. i hope you sleep well” he smirked, quietly shutting the door behind him. You were left alone, needy, unfinished yet exhausted. Climbing between the covers left you feeling overwhelmed and almost angry at the boy, who had left you so desperate for his touch. Why did he leave you like this? Did he regret what he did?

— Your alarm rang at 9:00am as it did every morning. The light in your room danced through the pearl lace blinds, covering your sheets on the soft glow of the sun. Your thighs seemed to cramp up as you lifted yourself out of bed, but without sheer disregard, you made your way to the kitchen. The hallway was empty, with each bedroom door l left open, indicating their absence, the smell of a sweet concoction guiding you through the corridor. You found lethargy grasping you this morning- alot more than usual. You couldn’t quite remember what happened last night, as you were yet to shake off the early hour daze alongside ensuring you made it to breakfast in time before nothing was left. However, you were left to question your facade upon a greeting of questionable stares as you placed yourself at the marble island in the centre of the room. Nonchalant, you grasped the frosted glass of water that was sat at the table, finishing it at pace. You sighed in relief as it soothed your throat and woke you up slightly. “Good morning y/n!” Joon sang, pushing a large serving of sugar waffles and chopped fruit in your direction. Their was a queer rigidity in the room, leaving an awkward silence as you listened to the pan sputter on the stove. You were set back by the lack of communication but greeted Namjoon in return. “Does anyone know where Yoongi is? He’s going to miss breakfast.” Tae finally iterrogated, breaking the silence. He threw a raised eyebrow in your direction, before wandering his eyes to the clothes you were wearing. With that, your heart stopped, head sinking into your plate, finally remembering why you were so tired. How could you let it slip your mind? You looked down at the shirt hanging from your neck in a sudden fear, realising how exposed you were. Dark bruises were planted all over your neck and thighs, and you dropped your fork in panic and embarrassment, the clatter ringing in your ears . With this, Yoongi sauntered through the door frame, yawning as he picked his plate from the table. “Morning” he mumbles to the boys, brushing past your back. “Nice shirt y/n” he taunts, winking playfully, before disappearing off into the lounge with his food. Your face turned red as Namjoon laughed over the counter, rolling his eyes playfully. Pursing your lips, you pushed yourself from the counter, quickly following Yoongis trail.

You were embarrassed and confused, with no idea how to feel about Yoongi. What did he mean, he wanted me for so long ? Then why would he leave you so desperate and wanting more? The room was glaring with the warmth of the sun, the large window wall televising the city in the brilliant morning glow. You were welcomed to the sight of a sleepy Yoongi quietly hunched over his breakfast, facing the skyscrapers and peacefully watching the clouds. His hair was messy, just like it was left last night- sporting the same joggers that were slightly stained. The golden reflection bounced off his face, his eyes shimmering and his complexion glowing. You seemed to find yourself admiring him, awing at the way his body looked as he relaxed in the quiet room. Despite your silence, he sensed your presence, indicating his knowledge with smile at his feet before turning in your direction. “Hey beautiful” hey hummed, patting the space next to him. You shook off your stare, all while remaining confused and dazed, you made your way over, slumping to his side. His toned arm reached around you, holding you confidently into his side and pinching your cheek softly. “Good morning Yoongie” you sighed. You were in hope to question last night, but before you had the chance he cut short your brainstorming with a soft kiss on your lips, causing your body to shake off the restlessness that cultivated upon your shoulders in the kitchen. You slightly smiled against his lips, a small sigh of relief falling from his mouth as he pulled away. You found yourself not entirely caring about wether anybody walked in, the feelings of lust washing over you, reminding you of the previous night as his eyes stared into yours. The silence was deafening yet comfortable, his hand adjusting the shirt he gave to you in an attempt hide your breasts that were close to visible above the hem. Yoongi seemed confident and sure, and yet you were left to fear that now everything would be awkward between the two of you. A few silent moments had passed, both of you drowning in thought, before Yoongi moved his hands to yours. “Y/n, I want you. I want to finish what we started but only if you can be mine- and only mine” he growled, keeping his voice low and quiet to ensure his privacy. “ Yoongi I- I’m confused. You just left me last night! I thought you regretted whatever it was” you squeaked, hair falling infront of your face as you dropped your head in worry. His eyes were diverted, scanning the marks he had left on you- his reminder that of how good he made you feel. A slight smirk glazed his face causing you to shift in your seat, his gaze causing you blush. You suddenly felt yourself needy for him to finish his work- for his touch and his voice calling you sweet names. Maybe you wanted him too. His hand traced your thigh, pushing the bottom of the shirt away to reveal deep red finger prints. Further it moved to your shorts, placing his cold hand upon your clothed heat, where you were met with a chuckle; “oh kitten no. That was just my revenge”

[thereaderstea]

G´day tor-mon, how are you<3? Recommend me your favourite bts!jungkook x reader fics! so I guess its not an au?(no smut✋🚫)

Merry meet, nonnie! I am well, busy and a little stressed because I had a power outage yesterday, but well nonetheless ☺️ I hope you are merry in the holidays (if you celebrate) and are happy and healthy 😄🖤💜

asdfghjkl, my favorite JJK x Reader fics? I have to choose? 😰 *has an existential crisis*

Alright, after some deep reflection, an existential crisis, and fighting the urge to devour these fics again (you have a mission, tor-mon!), I present to you my current favorite JJK fics (this list is only bound to grow). These fics have made me feel so intensely and I think about these fics a lot (an unhealthy amount, probably). I sorted them by genre: fluff to angst to yandere.

tor-mon’s Favorite JJK x Reader Fics

Sugar and Coffee by @jimlingss​  ➵Fluff, Angst, Slice of Life | slice of life au |  pâtisserie school au | enemies to friends to lovers au | Slice of Life series | 23 ch series | 100.5k ➵You are quite the pâtisserie chef, or at least on your way to becoming one, but there’s that one person who always has to complain, Jeon Jungkook.  ➵A masterpiece, honestly. I remember cracking up so hard over their competitions, the banter, and dynamics, but nothing beats that one day after the dream... I don’t want to spoil! but I do want to warn that there is a wet dream (not too graphic and it’s not a lot, I promise) somewhere in there, but honestly, it’s so hilarious.

Chess of Ice by Jimlingss​ | The Reader’s Tea Reviews 1 | 2 | 3 ➵Fluff, a lil bit of Angst | sports au | curling au | trilogy | 42.8k ➵Jeon Jungkook is a rising star, that is, until he falls. Now he’s picking up another sport, curling. ➵I love a good team dynamic and the characters in this are everything 🙌🏻

Date in a Box by Jimlingss​  ➵Fluff | Service Series | oneshot | 9.7k (Jimlingss’s summary: ) ➵If you’re in a hurry then we’re here to help you! Everything you need in a box. Delivery less than five minutes. Upgrade and we can personalize your date even more! Guaranteed 100%! Don’t fret, we’re here.  ➵I love the entire Service Series because the concepts are so much fun and they’re hilarious and I love the service descriptions, aka the commercials XD

I Will Not Lose! by Jimlingss​ ➵Fluff | magic au | oneshot | 6.2k (Jimlingss’s summary: ) ➵A single bet - use every means to make Jeon Jungkook fall in love with you. ➵It’s fluffy and cute, and it’s got that hint of enemies to lovers, especially with how competitive the mc gets over this bet. And the ending! asdfghjkl ^.^ 

midas by @gukyi​  ➵Fluff, (light) Angst, Comedy | enemies to lovers au | ceo au| magical realism au | oneshot | 32k (gukyi’s summary: ) ➵jeon jungkook was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and the power to turn whatever he wants into pure gold. you were born with healing and invisibility powers but without a cent to your name. so when you’re plucked off of the streets for pickpocketing and assigned to be his minder as punishment, you realize you’re going to have to overcome a lot more than class differences if either of you are going to get what you want. (or,) ➵you become Jungkook’s magical babysitter ➵I really love this concept! This fic is what got me looking into magical realism as an entire genre. But also, who doesn’t love a good enemies to lovers? and from the master of enemies to lovers 🙌🏻

ice prince by gukyi | The Reader’s Tea Review   ➵Fluff, (very light) Angst | figure skating au | enemies to lovers au | oneshot | 22k ➵Your ice skating partner just had to break his leg right before a big competition and “of all people on this godforsaken Earth, you’ve been re-paired up with Jeon Jungkook, Ice Prince.” ➵an axel-lent enemies to lovers :D I love it so much! And I really love Tae and mc’s friendship and all those icebreaker questions ☺️

if i told you by gukyi​  ➵Fluff, (light) Angst, Comedy | friends to lovers au | college au | oneshot | 22k ➵Jeon Jungkook is a broke college student, so to pay off his debt, he sells himself as the perfect boyfriend. If only you weren’t a broke college student either, then maybe you could buy yourself a date with Jungkook. ➵The mc is so not what I expected, (no spoilers!) all I will say is that I really love how supportive she is. I also love how close they are and this Jungkook is too fluffy and cute! ^.^

a moonlight melody by gukyi​ | The Reader’s Tea Reviews 1 | 2 ➵Fluff, Soft Angst | fake dating au | orchestra au | vacation au | duology | 50k ➵Your best friend has pranked you too many times and you’ve done nothing about it, because you, quite frankly, suck at pranking. As such, Jungkook ➵This is so soft and magical and sweet and soft ☺️ and did I mention soft? but also all those memes! There is so much good and wholesome and hilarious dynamics in here! This is the kind of fic that makes me wish I had a big friend group to do crazy stuff like this (but I hear you have to leave your house and, like, socialize??)

Down With The Ship by @tatastaetae | The Reader’s Tea Reviews 1 | 2 | 3 ➵Fluff, Angst | pirate au | trilogy | 25.4k ➵ You board a ship to escape forced love; but you join a pirate crew to fall into the arms of your only true and constant love: the sea. (or, tatastaetae’s summary: ) ➵Captain Jeon Jungkook; a beautiful mess of blood and gold. His greatest treasure, may also be his greatest downfall. ➵Very very fluffy! I love the adventure and the antics and I still want to know what’s in that soup, Jin! But that ending, holy heck, I didn’t see it coming and I just malfunctioned and stared at my wall in shock for who knows how long, and I just love tatastaetae’s fluffy writing which always somehow wrecks my soul! ^.^

His Name by @jimlingss ➵Angst | multiple personality au | 8 part series | 52.4k ➵Jeon Jungkook has multiple personalities and gaps in his memory. It’s your job to treat him and perhaps help him remember his past... ➵This is the first bts fic I ever read (a special thanks to Nani for reccing it ☺️) and so it holds a special place in my black heart, especially because I sobbed so hard at 3 in the morning and my mind was stuck on this for days

Gravity by @donewithjeon | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵Angst, Fluff | ‘90s au | oneshot | 29k ➵Time can bring you together, but Time can also push you apart; will you and Jungkook be able to fight the distance and Time to stay together, or were you always meant to only share this descent to earth for just a moment, always meant to eventually drift apart? ➵I am a wimp when it comes to Time, but does that stop me from reading fics that exploit that weakness? nope! That last train scene destroyed my heart and that entire ending, the acceptance, stabbed me in the heart, for good measure.

written on the sky by @inktae​ | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵Angst, Fluff | apocalyptic au? | end of the world au | ‘seeking a friend at the end of the world’ au | oneshot | 22k ➵The 60-mile-wide asteroid was supposed to slip by Earth, but it’s a little late to change its course or do anything about it except to prepare for the end. So while you’re waiting for the end, find a friend, someone to hold a hand with at the end of the world. ➵I was sobbing before the fic even finished. The odd thing is that you know the end, but knowing doesn’t prepare you for the feels. 

below thunder showers by inktae | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵ Angst, lil bits of Fluff | sci-fi au | oneshot | 30k ➵ Yoongi leads Earth, while you lead a withered space station. You go to Earth to settle the tensions that have been brewing between Earth and the space station, and Jeon Jungkook, a broken soldier who holds a deep love for the rain, is there to deliver you. ➵we stan a fellow pluviophile ✊🏻 I am so conflicted over this Min Yoongi >.< but Jungkook is so soft and he really didn’t deserve to live this way :(

first light by inktae | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵Angst, Fluff | hotarubi no mori e au | 24.8k (inktae’s synopsis: ) ➵“Have you ever felt like the world is too loud sometimes?” “No. For me it’s always quiet.” ➵This fic wrecked me and made me so conflicted >.< I can never forget this fluffy, masked boy who lives in the woods and silence...

the swirling way of stars by inktae | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵Angst, Fluff | fantasy au | oneshot | 19k ➵You’re tasked with showing Jeon Jungkook what it’s like to live a completely normal life. ➵It’s just falling in love with life itself, the simple things, and it’s written so magically...how can you not fall in love?

the train of lost souls by inktae | The Reader’s Tea Review ➵Angst, lil bits of Fluff | fantasy au | oneshot | 13.6k ➵You have two options when you step on the train: you can live but forget your life, and everyone in your life will forget you, or you can move on and keep your memories for the rest of time. But, how can you choose when part of your soul rests on this train, and the other part longs for someone just out of reach... ➵Once again, I’m a wimp with Time, and the choices really get me thinking...

Pen Pal by @chinkbihh​  ➵Part 1 | Part 1.5 | Part 2 | Final 1/2 | Final 2/2 ➵Angst, Horror? | yandere au | murder and crime au | pen pal au | trilogy | 127.3k ➵Warnings: mental disorders (agoraphobia?), yandere, murder (stabbing)  ➵You sign up to receive a pen pal and are paired up with an inmate, jungkook. You just wanted to talk to someone who could understand what it’s like to be removed from society, but you just may be getting more than you asked for... ➵I love a good yandere fic, there’s something about a yandere’s demented psychology that calls to me, and it’s always so interesting to see how one yandere differs from another, especially in different scenarios. But please please please read and be mindful of the warnings in case it just doesn’t vibe with you.

Quarter Quell by chinkbihh ➵Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | +more  ➵Angst, Horror? | yandere au | hunger games au | ongoing ➵You have resigned to your fate as a tribute in the next hunger games when someone from District Two takes an interest in you...a bit too much of an interest, you’d say. ➵I am a little hesitant to rec this because it isn’t finished, but the premise is exciting and I am really amped for the next chapter in this fic, heck yeah! I mean, heck, a yandere hunger games au? let’s go! But please please please read the warnings in case it just doesn’t vibe with you

~*~

Bonus rec!

I haven’t read this fic, but my friend, Nani, rec’d it to me the other day, and it sounds so exciting :D so I’ll let her tell you about it:

Fan Identity by @tteokggukk​  ➵Fluff, Crack, Angst | enemies to lovers au | social media au | 37 ch series   ➵Influencer!JK is whipped for influencer!reader. Both don’t know they’re interacting with each other on their secret fan accounts. You’re rooting for the two long before they properly meet. But the best part? You’re rooting for their pseudos, Blair Witch and Seagull, as well. ➵I laugh, I pause, I gasp. The conflict between the two mc’s hurt. Honestly, it made the story worth the read.

~*~

Can I also...🥺...may I suggest:

10 Series by @deepdarkdelights | The Reader’s Tea Reviews 1 | 2 | 3 | The Reader’s Tea Analysis ➵10 Seconds | 10 Days | 10 Years ➵Horror? | yandere au | Bouquet Series | 10 Series | trilogy | 29.2k ➵You’re just a college student returning home from a late night out trying to finish up your ungodly college work...but “All it took was ten seconds” and well, now, you’re his. ➵How can I not include my favorite yandere writer, the master of yandere, herself? 🥺 I’m only hesitant because you requested no smut and I respect that, but if you are alright with a small smut scene (I promise there’s not too much) or even just skimming/skipping over it, I would highly recommend this series 🙌🏻 The smut scene is in the final installment (10 Years). It’s an all-time favorite from an all-time favorite writer. But please please please read the warnings in case it just doesn’t vibe with you.

~*~

Happy reading, carissima! I hope at least one of these fics will become your favorite, too ☺️ Let me know what you think as well after you’ve given the authors some love ☺️

Well met!

your fellow reading monster,

tor-mon 🖤

[theyneedtobangstahp]

Stray kids reaction to you falling asleep on them

First reaction and request !!! 

Requested by @taeyongsweave​ :> 

Genre:Fluff !

I got the gifs from pinterest so credits to the owners !! I kinda didn’t proofread ? I’m sorry if there spelling errors :< 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

` C H A N ▪

Staying up until 3 am to finish homework while having a date the next morning with Chan was a bad idea. You wanted to finish the homework as soon as possible so you won't be stressing out while on the said date with Chan, so you pulled an all nighter just to finish it. What are you doing for a date? Oh you know just gonna watch the sunrise on the beach, and running on at least an hour of sleep before you two go was kind of a bad idea. You tried staying awake during the car ride there, listening to upbeat music, ordering coffee, and talking to Chan about everything so you won't get sleepy. But that 1 hour of sleep was really taking its toll on you.

"Baby? Are you okay? Are you sure you don't want to take a nap? We still have like 50 mins until we reach the beach, you can get some shut eye while we're still far." He says while gently squeezing your thighs.

"No, its fine. I wanna stay awake so you have company baby." You say as you take a sip of your coffee. "Okay baby if you insist. But when you really can't help it just sleep okay? I'll wake you up when we get there."

50 minutes went by and you guys arrive at the beach, not a lot of people are there to watch the sunrise so it was great for you both. Chan puts the blanket on the ground and you both sit together. You put your head on his shoulder and get comfortable while he rests his hand on your waist, drawing patterns absentmindedly while you both were staring into the ocean. "It's really peaceful here." You state as you hear the ocean waves and birds chirping. "Yeah, especially when you're here." He says while kissing the top of your head. You smile at this and you both enjoy the comfortable silence while waiting for the sunrise.

Minutes passed and Chan could see a little bit of orange peeking out from the horizon. "Babe look." He states while stealing a glance at you. But he notices your eyes closed and your soft breathing prominent against your chest. He chuckles at this, he told you to sleep while you guys were in the car, and yet you didn't listen. But Chan loved you very much so he decided not to wake you up, instead, he pulled you closer to him, kissed the top of your head and made sure you were comfortable, took out his phone to remember the moment and made it his lockscreen. All while thinking how you were so cute while you were sleeping and having the yellows and oranges of light paint your face, did he truly thank you for choosing him and not someone else. Chan truly loved you with all of his heart.

` M I N H O ▪

After a long day of school, all you wanted to do when you got home was crash on your bed and sleep the whole weekend. That was the plan. So when you got home, you didn’t expect Minho on the couch (which he kinda made into a fort that looks really comfy) with pizza on the table with your favorite drink and a movie ready to be played. 

“You’re home!” He says while standing up and hugging you, his (now yours also) 3 cats also welcoming you home. You hug him back and nuzzle your face in his neck. “I’m so tired.” 

“I know baby, thats why I made this. Now go upstairs and change into your pajamas, we’re gonna relax all weekend, we deserved it.” He pecks your lips and gently pushes you into your room to change. 5 minutes later and you guys are cuddled up on the fort he made, with Soon-ie, Doong-ie, and Dori also snuggled up next to you guys. You put you head on Minho’s chest and he starts patting your head. Both of you watch the movie, but halfway through it you feel your eyelids drooping and you really wanted to fight it because times like this with Minho were kinda rare because of both your busy schedules. But you can’t help it, everything was just so relaxing and comfortable, and before you knew it you were asleep. Minho kinda didn’t notice at first because he was so immersed in the film but when he asked you a question and didn’t get an answer he glanced at you and noticed you were fast asleep. He just kinda looks at you, not in a weird way, in a wow-I-really-love-you-and-I-kinda-maybe-wanna-spend-my-life-with-you kinda look. You just looked so adorable and soft, and his heart was melting more when Dori cuddled up to you from behind. He can get used to this, days where you guys were just relaxing with the cats, like a family. 

` C H A N G B I N ▪

Changbin and you were only on the first stages of your relationship. You guys haven’t even had your first kiss yet. You both were just really shy because you liked each other so much, and God forbid if he saw you sleeping. Nope, you weren’t letting him see you sleep. It’s cause you had this habit of opening your mouth when you sleep, and for you it was not flattering, especially when you drool, for you it was your least favorite part about your sleeping habits. Why can’t everyone just sleep cutely? Like the ones in the movies. So when Changbin invited you over to the dorms and you stayed there until 1am, he insisted you stayed the night. 

“No, It’s fine Binnie, I can walk myself home, it’s not that far.” 

“What kind of a boyfriend would I be if I let my baby walk alone at this time of night? Come on babe just stay, please?” He says while giving you a cute pout. Who can resist his pout? No one. “Okay fine, but I need to borrow some clothes, I didn’t pack any. Also no funny business okay.” 

“I promise. I respect you so much that no funny business will happen without your consent, okay ?” He leads you to his room, which he shares with the other boys, kinda uncomfortable because a handful of the boys will see your sleeping face, but you can just sleep facing the wall and hope that you won’t move as much through the night. You change into changbins sweats and tshirt, which was really big on you but he insisted that it looked just fine. Okay now you guys were kinda facing the ceiling, yes, both of you were. As I said you both were on your first months of dating so cuddling or even sharing a bed was very new to the both of you guys.

“Uhm.. Are you comfortable?” He asks. “Kinda? I think I’m gonna sleep on my side so I can get comfortable. Goodnight Binnie.” You say and kiss his cheek, turning to your left side.

“Oof, Changbin won’t get cuddles tonight, I owe Seungmin money now.” Minho states as he looks over at both of you. “Shut it.” Changbin says giving Minho a glare. Minho puts his hands up and faces the other side. You chuckle at this and internally apologize to Changbin. 

Next morning rolls by and Changbin can’t feel his left arm. He was confused as to why, but when he saw you next to him and hugging his torso, while your mouth was open, looking like a literal angel to Changbin, he didn’t mind too much. He lets you sleep a few more minutes, just admiring your beauty and being thankful that he convinced you to stay the night. 

“Awww, why you gotta cuddle? Now I owe Minho hyung money.” Seungmin says as he peeks inside the room. “Quiet, Y/N is still sleeping.” Seungmin glances at you and laughs a little. “Are you sure she’s asleep? Kinda looks a little dead to me.” Changbin Chucks a pillow at his face which makes him leave the room. “Don’t listen to him baby, you look really cute right now while you’re sleeping.” He says while moving away stray hairs that was covering your face. As if you could hear him, you smile while you were sleeping and Changbin could feel his heart beat ten times faster because of you.

` H Y U N J I N ▪

Sitting on the dance studio's couch at 1 am wearing Hyunjins oversized sweater and shorts was not what you expected your friday night would be. Hyunjin called you over at midnight asking you to come and keep him company while he practiced the new choreo that was taught. You being crazy, agreed and went to where he was.

An hour passed of him doing the same move, you got worried. You knew that when Hyunjin over exerted himself he would get sick. And you didn't want him sick. He was extra clingy ang whiny when he got sick. Not that you minded, it was just you didn't get to finish anything when he was sick cause he will trap you in his arms the whole day.

"Hyunjin I think you should rest. You've been doing that move for over an hour. You're going to get sick if you don't rest and drink water." You say while already holding his bottle of water. He looks at you and sees just how small you looked wearing his sweater. He can't just say no when it comes to you.

"Okay-" He stops the music and walks over to you. "-just for 15 minutes though. I really need to get this one right." He sits next to you and gets the water bottle that you were handing to him. Giving you a peck on the cheek as a thank you. You rest your head back and close your eyes.

"Wake me up in 15 minutes okay? If I hear the music playing again or hear your sneakers I will drag you out of here and take you home." You say to him.

"Ooh, my baby is feisty tonight." He jokingly says. "Okay y/n I'll wake you up in 15 minutes. But I think you'll get a stiff neck if you sleep like that. Why don't you put your head on my lap? So that you're comfortable and it ensures that I stay here?"

"Nice thinking babe." You say as you put your head on his lap. He pats your head to help you fall asleep faster. "Oh when we get home you need to shower right away okay? We can't risk you getting sick." You say and shiver a little because of your exposed legs.

Hyunjin notices this and reaches inside his bag. Pulling out a jacket, he unzips it and puts it on your legs.

"Okay baby, will do." He continues patting your head, and soon enough he can hear your light snores and the subtle twitching of your fingers. Small habits that you have when you sleep. You looked so cute like this. Although Hyunjin was kind of sorry because he asked you to go to the studio at midnight.

"I can't believe you went here wearing shorts. What if some creep saw you? I won't be there to protect you." He frowns at this. "I'm sorry Y/N. Next time I'll just go home and cuddle you where you can sleep comfortably." He admires you for a couple of minutes, not realizing that his head was slowly leaning back and his eyes closing. The day of dancing was finally gaining up to him. Next thing you guys knew, it was already morning and Hyunjin was was hot to the touch.

"You didn't get to shower! Now you're sick!" You say to him.

"Hehe, I'm sorry baby." He says innocently smiling at you.

`J I S U N G ▪

Jisung was on the bed on his phone, playing with the other boys. While you on the other hand was drowning yourself in homework for the past 2 hours. Jisung actually came home 30 minutes ago and kissed your cheek then played on his phone. He knew not to disturb you so much when you were doing your homework because when you got motivated to do your work, you don’t take a break, because if you take a break, you will procrastinate the whole day so you just hope to finish your work before 5pm so you have time to cuddle your boyfriend. 30 minutes later you close your book very loudly and practically throw yourself on Jisung who was still playing on his phone.

“Boyfriend I now acquire attention.” You say as you cuddle his chest with his arms around you so he can still continue playing the racing game.  “Wait baby one more round with the boys and I’m all yours.” minutes passed and you felt your eyelids get heavy. All the hours of being slouched on your desk answering the homework really got to you. You snuggle closer to Jisung, your face squeezed on the crook of his neck. You give him a peck there before closing your eyes.

Jisung closes his phone and puts it on the bedside table. He bear hugs you and kisses your crown. “Should I wake you up? Nah you look cute right now, I can’t wake you up now.” He says in a baby voice to your sleeping form. “I can like scream right now and wake you up? A fun way to wake someone up, don’t you think baby?” Jisung was a weirdo. He moved you a little so he can entangle your legs together. He puts the blanket up to your chin to ensure that you won’t get cold and hugs you closer. 

“I can’t do that to you baby. You look so cute when you sleep I can’t possibly ruin it by screaming into your ears. I love you so much sweet dreams sweetheart.” He says as he places a last kiss on your head and drifts of to sleep with you.  

` F E L I X ▪

Being bestfriends with Felix was very tiring, in a good way. He was always hyper and a living meme. Everytime you were with him was like being with a 6 year old with a sugar rush all day. But thats why you loved him. Yep, you loved him, you don’t know when it started, maybe it was when he brought you to your favorite cafe when you got a bad score to cheer you up, or when he smiles at you and waves when he sees you in the distance, or maybe when he does this dance when he wins a game and he sometimes asks you to join him dance. Maybe it was all of it. So when Felix texted you that he was coming over you started preparing when he was gonna come to your house. Preparing by putting on lip tint and washing your face to look a tad bit presentable. 

“Woah, are you wearing lip tint? You never wear lip tint at home though?” He asks as he takes off his shoes by the door. “I was having a little selfie session before you came?” You said, well by the way you said it, it kinda sounded like a question. “Really? Send them to me, I need a new homescreen.” You stop at this. “I’m your homescreen?” 

“Well, yeah, who else would be my homescreen? I saw your phone, and I was your homescreen so it’s normal right?” Ouch yeah, it is normal, you both were bestfriends for so long that this was normal for you guys. “I mean, sure, I’ll send them to you.” 

You both go to your room and he jumps on your bed. “So what do wanna do?” He asks. “Weren’t you the one that invited yourself? I thought you had a plan?” He shrugs at this. “I’m just winging everything at this point Y/N, mostly with maths, yeah that one, I’m really winging that one.” You laugh at this. “Want me to teach you?”

“Aren’t you also kinda failing math?” “Look lets just watch a tutorial or something so we both learn.” You say as you get your laptop and put it at the end of the bed. “But thats boring, I came here to spend time with you, not learn.” You pass him your notes and put your head on his lap. “Look, I’m not failing math, I’m good at it, average at best, but you. All I can say is you need this more than I do Lix. So just watch one episode and I’ll just be here monitoring your work.” You say as you pick a lesson that you previously had at school. “And why is your head is on my lap?” He asks. “Cause it’s comfy, now go and learn!” You say as you play the video. Felix seems to be immersed and learning things cause he was writing stuff on your notes and answering the questions the video asks. Kinda boring now because you didn’t expect Felix to actually answer them. So you decide to take a nap while he was preoccupied. 

“Hey if x is equal to 82 then the answer would be-” He glances at you and sees that you were asleep. He stops the video and puts the notebook down. “What are you doing to me Y/N?” He asks himself in particular. Felix had this crush on you, and he definitely knows when it started. He didn’t really know if you also had feelings for him, he doesn’t wanna do something that can make things awkward so he just keeps his mouth shut. But while you were looking so cute sleeping on his lap, he just can’t help but take a picture. So he does, he takes a picture of the mirror on  the front of your bed and puts a hand on your head. “Cute” He says as he makes it his lockscreen photo, saving the homescreen for the selfies you were gonna send him later. Maybe one day he’ll confess, but while he doesn’t have the courage yet, he’ll just admire you from the sides.  

` S E U N G M I N ▪

You and Seungmin woke up extra early today because he invited you over for a beach day with the boys. When you guys arrived, they were all ready to jump in the water, but you being the mom in your friend group stopped them.

"Guys! You haven't put on sunscreen yet!" You say as you wave the sunscreen up. They all stop halfway through and runs back to you. You laugh at them of how cute they look right now. Once they were done they bolted back into the water.

The boys left you with Seungmin. "I'll help you set up babe." He says while grabbing an umbrella from you.

"No! I'll set up while you-" You take the umbrella from his hands. "-have fun with the boys. This is rare that you guys get to have a rest day, and let alone do it on the beach. So you leave this to me and you go have fun with the boys." You say while pushing him near the ocean.

"But-"

"No buts! Now go have fun!" You turn away from him covering your ears to show that whatever he says will not make you change your mind. He smiles at you, even though you weren't looking at him, then runs over to where the boys were, joining in on the fun.

The day consisted of you taking care of the boys. Making sure everyone ate well and applied sunscreen again before going in the water. After lunch, Seungmin came up to you, all wet because of the ocean.

"Come on Y/N join us!" He says while trying to get you up from your sitting position on the blanket.

"I'll stay here Seung. No one will look after our belongings if I join you guys so I'll just stay." You say trying to convince him.

"Chan is gonna rest for a while, he can watch our things while he rests and you can join us. Come on we haven't even taken photos yet." He says pouting at you. How can you resist the pout? You agree and he takes your hand in his and runs to the water.

You guys have fun splashing around all day. When it was time to leave, everyone was exhausted. The drive home was silent, apart from the calm music that was playing on the speakers. You and Seungmin were at the back, your head on his shoulders and his head leaning on yours.

"Thanks for inviting me Seung, I had a really fun day." You say while closing your eyes. The tiring day taking its toll on you.

"I'm glad you had fun babe. But all you did was look after us. I really appreciate that babe, but I feel bad that you only got to enjoy the beach for a few hours. You set up everything and even grilled for us! I'm really thank-" He stops mid sentence cause he notices how your head was hanging lower and lower from the bumps that you guys were passing by. He holds your head and sighs. You probably were very tired from all the things you did the whole day. 

He felt guilty, but when he looked at the photos you guys took, he saw how your eyes were sparkling while splashing him with water, and how your smile was so big when you guys managed to bury Chan in the sand. He smiles and holds your hand, whispering something to you even though he knows you can’t hear him.

"I love you very much."

` J E O N G I N ▪

Jeonginie, sweet baby uwu. 

So you and Jeongin were really good friends. Both of you became close because some of your friends were friends with his friends. So you guys kinda had this big ass group that did everything together. Hence the weekly movie night at one of your friends place. You guys squeezed next to each other, feeling awkward cause you both weren’t used to being this close. Everyone was immersed in the film, except Jeongin. The poor boy couldn’t think straight with how close you were to each other. The only thing running through his head was “Oh my God, oh my God, can they feel my heart beating so fast? Am I too tense? What if they think I’m weird that I’m just sitting here? Of course you’re just gonna sit Jeongin you’re watching a movie.” He continues to have thoughts like this running through his head, not thinking about the facial expressions he was showing. 

“Are you okay Innie?” What were you doing to him? When you said his nickname he felt like his heart was gonna combust. “O-oh? Y-yeah I’m good.” He says while sitting straighter than before. “If you say so.” You say and face the tv. You subconsciously put your head on his shoulder and I kid you not, he almost malfunctions. He was so red and he was shifting so much that you thought he wasn’t comfortable, so you took your head off of his shoulder. “Sorry I made you uncomfortable.” 

“No it’s nothing like that y/n. It’s just.. Look it’s fine if you do it I don’t mind.” He awkwardly reaches for your head and puts it on his shoulder. You get comfortable and Jeongin is still kinda tense but you don’t mind. 10 minutes later he feels your head was slowly slipping from his shoulder, he gently holds your head and adjust his seat so your head can comfortably rest on his shoulder while you were sleeping. 

He looks around to see if any of your friends notice what was going on and breathes out when he sees that everyone was still watching and paying no mind to both of you. He gently caresses your hair and appreciates how peaceful you look right now. Damn, he was whipped for you and for you only. He doesn’t notice it, but he eventually falls asleep too. You both wake up when hushed whispers and the sound of clicking is heard around you. Not to mention a flash that was so strong it almost blinded you by how close it was to your face. 

“Jisung! We told you to take the flash off!” You hear one of your friends whisper. “I’m sorry I thought I had it off!” Jisung says. You open your eyes and the sight that greets you is your friends and their phones close to your face. 

“What are you guys doing?” You say as you rub your eyes. “You and Jeongin just looked so cute while sleeping we needed to take pictures.” She shoves her phone to your face and you have to admit, you guys do look cute together. 

[archaneanscribe]

Big Girls Cry

I wanted some MinPalla childhood sweethearts, inspired by their mini-alts in FEH. Part of the Archanea Chronicles.

When their mother died, Palla did not cry.

Est was one, but due to their mother’s illness she had seen more of the local midwife and her sisters than she ever did of their mother, so only cried as much as a baby normally cries.

Catria was five, and she cried a whole, whole lot. She gripped Palla’s skirt and wailed, snot and tears dripping down her face. She woke up and cried, and went to sleep crying.

When you’re eight like Palla, you’re a big girl- so that means no more crying. That’s what she reminded herself over and over when the tears threatened, anyway.  She knew Mother wouldn’t agree, would tell her that it’s okay for big girls to cry, that it’s okay for anyone to cry.

But Mother was gone. They had lost Father only a year ago, and now she was gone too.

It was just the three of them.

So she was going to be the best big sister ever, and be super tough. If she cried, they would know that there was a chance things wouldn’t be okay. She was going to work to be so strong that nothing could ever hurt her little sisters ever again.

The captain of the pegasus division of the Macedonian army, Mylla, had always told her she was too young to follow in her mother’s footsteps, that she had a few more years to grow.

But the day after the funeral, her mind had changed. 

First thing in the morning, training lance gripped in hand, Palla approached her again, mouth knit into a tight, determined frown.

“Lass, look-” the older woman began, as always, but now she paused, expression stricken with an emotion that Palla couldn’t yet decipher, “That’s quite the face you're making. Not the face of a young girl anymore.”

Her grip tightened.

Sighing, the captain’s shoulders slumped, “If you’re so determined, you can train with the Princess. Normally only the royal family start this young, but I suppose she wouldn’t mind a sparring partner her own age. Follow me.”

Her face perked up at the mention of Princess Minerva, “Oh, thank you!”

Of course, she had known about the first princess for some time. Her mother had been the queen’s personal vassal before both their deaths, so Palla had been told from a young age she would likely inherit a similar duty. She followed close at Mylla’s heels, into the castle walls. Another place she had visited briefly with her mother, but she had never gone through this way, into the royal guard’s training area.

When they arrived, they found a girl who couldn’t be any older than she was having her footing be critiqued by an older man.

“Oi, Odger!” Mylla called out to catch his attention. He turned to look at them, his grizzled but not unfriendly face reminding Palla of her father in many ways. The girl, who she realized must be Princess Minerva, looked at her with curiosity. Maybe she didn’t get to see a lot of other kids?

The man named Odger relaxed his posture, gesturing to Palla, who was overcome with a sudden wave of shyness and hid behind the Captain, “What’ve you got there? New recruit for the guard? A little young, ain’t she?”

Mylla stepped aside and gave the young girl a gentle push, sending her stumbling forward into focus. Mustering her courage, she stood up straight, holding her lance in the way she remembered seeing her mother do when speaking to the late queen, deferential yet confident, “I’m Palla, sir. Atheleys daughter. I want to become a pegasus knight like my mother was.”

He gazed at her impassively, “What if I said you’re not old enough? Isn’t that what Mylla has been telling ‘ya?”

She knew that she shouldn’t say what she was about to, that with the strict way the Macedonian military operated, she could ruin her chances of ever getting a position in the corps, but the repressed feelings from her mother’s passing bubbled to the surface as she replied, heatedly, “I would say that I am old enough. I watched my Mother my whole life. Give me time and I’ll surpass everyone!”

For a moment following their outburst, there was silence, but it was quickly followed by raucous laughter from Odger, who pat his belly jovially, “Careful talking to yer superiors like that, little lady! If I was anyone but a retired knight turned combat instructor, there'd be some real consequences,” he calmed down, settling his face into a soft smile, “I see you’re truly serious. It won’t be easy, and you won’t get any special treatment- just like this one here doesn’t.”

The Princess nodded gravely.

“Show up tomorrow at sun up, and be ready. I won’t be teaching you the basics.”

“Thank you, sir! I’ll do my best!”

---

He was serious when he said it wouldn’t be easy. Every evening when she came home to her sisters, it was in a state of exhaustion and ache, every muscle complaining at once.

That doesn’t mean she wasn’t enjoying herself.

Every lance swing, every knee scrape, made her feel closer to her mother, which in turn made her stomach churn less when Est looked up at her and called her “Mama!” before being corrected,

And, of course, there was her training partner.

Princess Minerva was a serious girl, in much the same way Catria seemed poised to become. There was a look on her face that Palla knew meant she planned to be a fighter her whole life, and that this training was not just exercise- but might one day keep her alive. 

But if you got her talking about her brother, baby sister, or the pegasus she had been working with, it was an entirely different story. Her eyes would light up and she would laugh and swing her arms around recounting the story of the way her little sibling finally said her name for the first time.

“She can only call me ‘Min’ right now,” she recounted as they took a break to eat some lunch, smiling as she wiped some crumbs off her face, “But the nursemaid told me that in a few months she will likely be able to say my full name.”

“I remember when Catria used to call me ‘Pal’,” Palla replied, swallowing her bite of bread, “Its’ nice that you’re a big sister too. I get lonely sometimes when I only get to see my sisters.”

Minerva nodded, “I understand. I love my brother and my sister, but I enjoy speaking to someone close to my own age. Father said it would be good for me. He wants me to be strong, but,” she leaned in conspiratorially, “He’s actually nice. Him and my brother can be scary, but they’re both very kind.”

Palla giggled, “My mother was the same way. Everyone said she was so serious, but she always played with me and read me lots of stories.”

“...do you miss your mother very much?”

Her head snapped up at this abrupt question to look at Minerva, who was turned away to hide her face, “I miss my mother.”

She sometimes forgot that the Princess had lost a parent as well, “...Yes. I miss her a whole lot. But,” she reached out to pat her companion’s knee, “I’m doing just fine! I’m going to be just as strong as she was. So you don’t have to worry about me!”

Because she was a big girl! Big girls didn’t think about their mother and cry into their pillows, or want to scream whenever they saw someone holding their mother’s hand!

Minerva moved to face her now, face twisted in confusion, looking like she had something to say but just didn’t know the right words, “Palla, I-”

“Times up, kiddos!” Odger’s voice shattered the tense atmosphere between them. So the conversation was left behind- but not forgotten.

---

It was many months later, nearing Palla’s tenth birthday, that Minerva stopped her before she headed home. The sun was setting and it’s final rays were streaming into the open area of the royal training area. Odger had already left, so it was only the two of them.

“Palla.”

“Yes, Lady Minerva?”

Minerva’s hand was on her wrist, holding her in place for the ensuing silence, before the Princess finally gathered her courage, “I was thinking about... when we get older.”

“When we get older?”

“Yes,” she took a deep breath, and spoke in that serious, assured tone she always did, “We should get married. That way, I can always make sure you’re not lonely or sad.”

Palla’s eyes widened, cheeks reddened, and jaw dropped, “Married!?”

Minerva’s face twisted like it had that day nearly a year ago, but this time, she was able to voice her thoughts, “When you leave, my heart hurts, because I know that you are sad- you always smile when you come here, but there are times I see you nearly in tears. The thought of you being lonely makes me quite angry. I want to make sure you’re always actually happy. Marriage seemed like the easiest way to do that.”

This never happened in any of her mother’s storybooks. There was usually an epic adventure and love story before the princess decided she was to defy her station and be with the knight she loved. 

And they usually weren’t nine years old, either.

However, the offer made Palla’s stomach warm. Minerva was strong, and reliable. She never expected Palla to be more than she was- just a girl her own age, a peer, a friend. Sometimes she even thought that it might be okay to share how she really feels to her, to open up, to... to cry. Even though she was a big girl. 

She thought that maybe, she didn’t have to be a big girl around Minerva.

“You mean it?”

“Yes. I want to make you happy.”

The tears started coming down, and big girl Palla was gone. All that was left was Palla- a not-quite-ten year old child who missed her mother, and just wanted to be a kid. The quiet crying quickly became hiccuping sobs, dragging her forearm across her eyes to dry the deluge as it came.

“I’m,” she sniffed loudly, “I’m lonely! I love my sisters, but I want my mother! I want my father! I want someone to take care of me sometimes too!”

In a flash, she felt a pair of arms around her, and realized slowly that she was being hugged by the taller girl. It was an awkward, unpracticed hug, but it was the first time she had been hugged by someone bigger than her in nearly a year. It wasn’t Catria or Est hugging her leg before they scurried off to play, it was a warm, enveloping hug that made her feel safe.

“I will take care of you. We can be together always. Father tells me that one day I shall get to be in charge of my own unit, and you can be in it. And we can get married. That way you’ll always know I will be there for you.”

Sniffling weakly now, she squeezed back tightly, “Thank you. I’ll do my best to get as strong as you so I can stay by your side.”

They stayed like that for a moment, the setting sun now having almost fully retreated, casting them in the cool darkness of the early night. In the back of her mind, Palla knew that Minerva was probably beholden to whatever marriage promises her father makes for her, but she couldn’t get herself to care.

Not when she could finally, finally, be herself.

---

It was thirteen years later when they were actually wed.

Of course Palla’s doubts had been correct at the time. The king had just laughed at his daughter, pat her head, and sent her on her way. He had several marriage contracts in talks with other kingdoms even at that time, so as much as he loved his daughter, one freedom he hadn’t planned to allow her was romance.

But, of course, before any of them could come to fruition, his life was snuffed out by his own son.

Over the years, Palla kept her promise, and was the first pegasus knight assigned to Minerva’s unit, later followed dutifully by her younger sisters and becoming the Whitewings that were known far and wide. Together, the two women had fought two wars, overcome adversity in all its forms, and a childhood friendship became... more.

So when Minerva renounced her claim to the throne, and wandered the land helping the war restitution with her own two hands, Palla followed suit. Their marriage was a small affair, done in the halls of Lena’s convent by the woman herself. It wasn’t for the public’s eye- it was just for them.

That night, as they curled together in bed feeling a peace that had been out of reach for months, Palla remembered her wife’s first proposal.

“You were ready to marry me at nine years old,” she reminiscenced fondly, enjoying the brief embarrassed tense up from Minerva, “I don’t think I could ever forget.”

“That seemed to me to be the only solution at the time,” she pulled Palla closer, “Everyone was always discussing marriage around me, so I believed it to be the solution to every ‘adult’ problem.”

“You turned out to be right, all these years later. I’m happily married to you, and I never feel lonely when you’re around.”

Minerva placed a kiss on her wife’s forehead, who hummed appreciatively at the gesture, “I did think about asking you again, many times, as we grew up, but by that point I had learned what it truly meant. And glad I am that I waited. I want to give you a peaceful, happy life.”

“And I want the same for you,” Palla replied, more certain than she had ever felt before. Happy tears welled in her eyes, just like they had when they exchanged vows.

And she let them fall.•

[massivelycreepypineapple]

We’re All We Got

Request: I would like a Dean x Reader where the reader is their little sister, and Dean has been with her since she was a little girl, and so he is always very protective, and one day she almost dies and he despairs a lot, but everything is fine.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Sister!Reader

A/N: Hope you enjoy this! :)

Word Count: 1820

❅ ❅ ❅

-flashback to 13yr old Dean-

“Shh, Y/N. It’s going to be ok. You’re fine, kiddo.” Dean whispered as he laid beside her on the motel bed, carding his fingers through her hair.

Y/N, was was running a high fever and it worried Dean and Sam to no end.

“De, my head hurts.” She whimpered, curling up into him.

“I know, kid. I’ll go to the store and get you some medicines ok?”

“No!” Cried Y/N clinging to him tighter. “Don’t go, please”

“Y/N we don’t have anything to make it better. I need to go get some stuff for you. Or it could get worse.” Said Dean trying to pry her hands off him, an action that immediately made her cry.

“D-don’t go!”

“No no please calm down! I’m right her ok? I’ll stay. I won’t go.” He soother her, panicking at her reaction. He had always had a special bond with the 7yr old, and he was extremely protective of her. Sam too, but Y/N was the youngest and was more prone to getting hurt than his brother.

Sam climbed in on the other side of the bed next to Y/N, “Y/N I’ll be right here with you. Dean won’t be long.” He tried convincing her.

“No! I only want De!”

“I’m right here, kid. Ain’t going anywhere.” Said Dean cuddling her more, making sure she was comfortable. He stayed with her till she feel asleep before he could go buy the stuff.

-Flashback end-

Dean was clutching onto Y/N’s hand in the hospital. She was severely hurt by a werewolf and had been quite close to death.

“I’m right here, kid.” He whispered to her unconscious form.

It pained him to see his baby sister like that. Especially when it was his fault. Y/N was no hunter. Her expertise lied in research. However, she did know how to fight almost as well as her brother but chose not to. This one particular hunt, he and Sam were outnumbered and needed an extra hand. So they had no choice but to take Y/N with them. Everything was going according to plan and the three of them fought like a well oiled machine. Unfortunately, right at the end when only one werewolf was remaining, the bastard got Y/N and hurt her badly before getting shot by Sam.

The car ride to the hospital was one of the worst moments of his life. He even made Sam drive them, opting to sit at the back making sure their little sister didn’t bleed to death. Once everything was taken care of, he had refused to leave her side and insisted on Sam getting the rest he needed.

And hour later Sam had arrived with two cups of coffee, startling Dean when he placed an hand on his shoulder.

“Dean, she’s alive. She’s going to wake up. The doctor said so himself.” Sam was very worried about both his siblings. One nearly died and the other is slowly running himself to an early grave.

“I’m fine, Sammy.” Dean mumbled.

“At least have some coffee.” Sam offered him the cup.

Dean took it absentmindedly and placed the thing on the table next to him, making Sam sigh. He barely noticed Sam take a seat beside him rubbing Y/N’s leg.

-flashback to 18 yr old Dean-

Y/N had been hanging out with a couple of her school friends when suddenly she barged into the motel room angry as hell and making a beeline to the bathroom. She slammed the door and locked it, startling her brothers. Dean shared a worried look with Sam and walked to the bathroom and knocked on the door.

“Y/N, what’s wrong?” He asked.

“Nothing is wrong! Go away!” She yelled, her voiced muffled by the door.

“I know something’s wrong, N/N! Don’t lie to me.”

“I said, GO. AWAY!”

“Did someone hurt you? You know I’ll beat the shit out of them!”

“Y/N, we just want to help.” Said Sam joining Dean.

“I just need 5 minutes ok?” Her voice broke at the end.

“You got 5 minutes, and then I’m coming in.” Said Dean, walking to the bed and sitting on the corner. He was still on alert, waiting for her to come out.

It had become little over 5 mins and just when Dean was about to pick the lock, the door opened a crack and Y/N’s tear stricken face came into view.

“De…” Her small voice came through.

“Y/N, what’s going on. Why are you crying?”

“I… I’m bleeding.” She whispered.

Both Dean and Sam were freaking out.

“What?!” They chorused.

“Y/N! Where? What was it? Why didn’t you say anything sooner?!” Dean was getting angry and trying to open the door more to get a look at her.

“Guys! Not like that! Nothing hurt me!” Her face was red with embarrassment.

They stopped for a second, “What do you mean, N/N?” Asked Sam.

That’s when it hit Dean. She got her first period. He looked at her with wide eyes.

“Oh…”

“Yeah.”

“What’s happening, guys?” A confused Sam asked.

“Sammy, just stay here ok? Keep an eye on her. Both of you just stay here. I’ll be back in 20mins.” With that he rushed out to get her what was needed.

An hour later Y/N was curled up on the bed under the blankets with embarrassment and a hot pack. While Dean was sitting beside her trying to tell her there was nothing to be embarrassed about.

“It’s a normal thing, N/N. It’s happens to every girl.”

“Not in public.” She mumbled.

“Not true, when I was your age, a classmate of mine started to.. you know.. in class. She was very embarrassed too and had her mom come get her. But eventually she forgot about it and so did everyone else.”

He was doing his best to assure her that she was fine, but what came out of her mouth next broke his heart.

“She had a mom to tell her about it. I don’t.”

“N/N…”

She was sniffling under the blankets, trying not to cry. He didn’t know what to say to comfort her.

“If mom were here, she’d be so proud of the way you’re handling it, kid. You’re a champ. I know I ain’t mom, but I’m here for you ok? I’ll always be here for you and Sammy.” He looked at Sam who was trying his best to help as much as he could.

“Thank you, De.” Y/N whispered. “You’re not mom, but you’re kinda cool.”

He ruffled her hair, making her laugh. “I’m more than cool, shortie!”

-flashback end-

Dean chuckled at that memory, kissing the back of her hand. He remembered how he had to explain to the shopkeeper what he was looking for. And he had to help Y/N figure out how to use it too because no one had taught her. They were both an embarrassed mess, but it all worked out in the end. It was hard for the three of them to not have any parental guidance. With a dead mother and an absent father, it fell on Dean’s shoulders to make sure Sam and Y/N were taken care of.

“I swear to god when you wake up I’m gonna kick you ass, kid.” He said softly. “You’re not making it easy on me. It’s my job to keep you safe and I failed. You’ve always been a trouble maker, you know? Sammy was easy compared to you and that’s saying a lot.” He chuckled.

“Hey! You’re one to talk.” Quipped Sam, smiling a little.

“Shush, Sam. It’s rude to interrupt.” He smirked at him. “Anyway, I’m just warning you. You enjoy the peace now. Caz when you open those eyes, I’m going to give you shit, Y/N.”

“Me too. Don’t think I’ll go easy on you, squirt.” Said Sam.

A few seconds later, Dean felt his hand get squeezed. A small groan came from Y/N.

“Y/N!” They called at the same time and sprung into action in a frenzy and called the nurse.

The doctor looked her up and gave her the clear to leave after 48 hours. He also gave them instructions on her diet and gave strict orders on bed rest until the wound healed a little more. When he left a silence set in the room until Y/N broke it.

“So you two think you could give me shit and get away with it?” She smirked tiredly at them.

“You don’t have a say in that, N/N. You nearly died! What were you thinking?!” Said Sam slightly angry.

“I’m sorry, Sammy. But I did what had to be done. It was unavoidable.” She smiled apologetically

“It was not unavoidable, Y/N! We could’ve handled it without you getting in its way!”

“Sam… it would’ve mauled you if I hadn’t. I couldn’t let my favourite Sasquatch get hurt now, can I?”

“Y/N I could’ve-“

“Sam, stop. I’m fine! I’m alive and kicking. So please let it go?” She gave him her puppy dog eyes which she learnt from him.

“Should not have taught you that.” He mumbled grumpily, making her giggle and wince.

Dean through it all was quiet. He was still trying to process everything.

“De…” Called Y/N.

He looked at her with tears in his eyes. He didn’t let them fall however.

“No. Don’t you dare say you’re fine caz you stopped breathing, Y/N!” He snapped at her.

She was taken aback.

“I never should’ve asked you to help us! This could’ve been avoided if I wasn’t such a dumbass.” He rubbed his face. “But at the same time, you saved Sammy. I can’t… I don’t know how to process this.”

“Dean. What was supposed to happen, happened. We’re Winchesters, we’re meant to get hurt, die and rise up again. It’s the way it has been.” Y/N said calmly.

“It doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“No it doesn’t” She chuckled lightly. “But it does mean that you of all people need to take a break once in a while and let the young people do the protecting.”

Dean chuckled at that, “You calling me old, kid?”

“Damn right.” She smirked at him making Sam snort.

“She’s right, Dean. So go take a shower and eat something before your old man body kills you dead.” Sam grinned at him.

“You’re not so young yourself, Sammy” He gave him a bitch face.

“Still younger.” He grinned.

Dean rolled his eyes at Sam and looked at Y/N with a soft smile. He kissed her forehead and whispered, “Don’t run off. I’ll be back in no time.”

“I’ll try not to.” She smiled at him, squeezing his hand before he reluctantly left to fix himself.

❅ ❅ ❅

TAGS BELOW

@hobby27 @akshi8278 @svmwinchesterr

[bangtan-madi]

546 Days Without You — Twelve: Day 440

Pairing — Seokjin x Reader

Tags — boyfriend!Seokjin, older brother!Yoongi, producer/songwriter!MC, military au (ish), idol au (ish)

Genre — fluff, angst

Word Count — 5.3k

Summary — Kim Seokjin is your entire world, and that world falls apart the moment he and your older brother Yoongi are conscripted into the South Korean military.

Part — 12 / 15

Warnings — minor language

A/N — highly recommend listening to "Soldier" by Taemin for this part (here's the link.) You'll cry buckets...not that I know from experience or anything...

Previous — Next

In less than a month, Seokjin keeps his promise. The moment you feel the plane begin to land, descending through the early morning fog that covers Incheon in a halo of peace, you're out of your seat and waiting by the gate. Sejin tries to convince you to sit, but as soon as your smile temporarily shifts into a glare, he backs off.

"Trust me, manager-nim," Jungkook laughs, "she's not sitting down."

"And if you try to make me, or in any way stop me from running off this plane to find Seokjin, I'll break your legs."

Jimin bursts out laughing at your angelic smile and fluttering eyelashes, adding the sickly sweet emphasis to your threat. Sejin gives you a thumbs-up as he rolls his eyes.

As the wheels hit the runway, you fish your phone from your pocket, instantly texting Seokjin. "Where are you?"

His reply is almost immediate: "Look out the window."

Doing as he requests, your grin widens. On the runway, standing in the dim light of sunrise, Seokjin waves his arms wildly. He's wearing civilian clothes — a black sweater paired with jeans and typical incognito gear: sunglasses and a beanie — something you haven't seen him wear in a long while. He looks healthy and happy.

True to your word, you burst through the door as the lock is released. Despite being on a private runway away from commercial planes, and BTS' return to Korea not being publicized, somehow reporters still find their way towards the aircraft. Luckily they haven't spotted the eldest member a little further back, but all that changes when you race down the exit ramp, push through the crowd, and bolt towards him. Arms open wide, feet taking you as fast as possible, you're careless in your show of emotion.

Seokjin closes the distance, scooping you into his embrace, off the ground, spinning around in the air. The sudden pressure of him against you is enough to break the dam of tears held inside. After spending a year and a half in a long-distance love — only able to speak through letters, texts, and calls — the fact that he's here in person catches you more off-guard than you thought it would. It's one thing to know he would be there waiting for you, but another thing entirely to have him in your arms, his warmth around you, his voice in your ear as he murmurs your name over and over.

When you finally pull back, Seokjin's hands cradle your face like it's the most tender thing he's ever held. His brown eyes are misty with emotion, and his lips stretch into a wide grin. "You're here..."

Nodding fervently, you place your fingers over his and close your eyes. Seokjin leans down and rests his forehead against yours, and the two of you finally feel the weight of 440 days fall away.

Even if just for a moment.

"I'm here."

As both of you attempt to close the distance, the flashing lights and barely-held-back noises of the media crowds not ten meters away is a rude reminder of how in the open you are. Despite being together for years, the world is mostly unaware of your relationship. Sure, there are theories floating around, but those come and go in differing forms. And honestly, because of your involvement with the boys, you've had a dating rumor with just about all of them.

That thought is enough to let you pause, bite your cheek, and settle back down from your tip-toes. Seokjin's eyes flutter closed in frustration, and he sighs heavily with similar emotion. Part of you regrets the agreement you made with each other — and the company — all those years ago. You were much younger, and the world was different. But now, would people really care so much if BTS' Jin was in a relationship with Min [Y/n]? Would it really wreck the group like Big Hit worried? Would Army really be that disappointed?

Surely, things have changed. In the year 2022, there has to be bigger things to worry about than two people being in love. When you shift your gaze to your peripheral vision, you see security keeping the nosey reporters at bay. Several of which you recognize from unpleasant events before. Despite your heart hurting at the thought of not being able to kiss him for a second longer, you know the hell that will break loose if you did. It having him means waiting another few minutes until you're in the privacy of the transport on its way to the airport, you can do that.

"Hey, look at me, Jagiya." Seokjin turns your face back towards his. As his eyes twinkle mischievously, his lips tug into a teasing smile. "I don't know about you, but I think I'm tired of hiding us."

Breath catching in your throat, you feel your lips part in surprise. "Are—Are you sure?" you whisper.

Your lover nods, and his thumbs graze the apples of your cheeks to emphasize his words. "If you are."

"And the company? The boys?"

"We've let their worries and concerns sway us for long enough, haven't we?" he murmurs. "This is our life. I'm tired of hiding it, hiding you, hiding us."

His words put your uneasiness to rest, and his soft whispers bring out a burst of bravery. Seokjin is right. You both have spent far too many years hiding your relationship from the world. All the time you've wasted worrying about appearances, or events, or the space between you both — both physically and other. He's one of the most important people in your life, and vice versa. You decide right then and there that there will never be another day that the whole world doesn't know that he is yours — and you are his.

Grasping the collar of his sweatshirt, you pull him down towards you. Despite displaying a smirk, Seokjin is eager to close the distance and cup your face closer to his. And in that moment, as your lips meet for the first time in over a year, your eyes flutter closed. The sounds and sights of shock around you, they're all irrelevant. All that matters here and now is you, and him, and this moment between you.

When you part, and your eyes flutter open once more, he's already pulling you into a tight embrace, nearly lifting your feet off the ground. "I missed you. So damn much."

Heart pitter-pattering at his words, you press your lips to the side of his head, spying a very shocked group of boys exiting the plane. Each of them looks a variant of happy but nervous, and Sejin's eyes are wider than you've seen in a while. All of you know that there's no going back now. It's all out in the open.

Good riddance to the damn secrets.

Jimin is the first to join the couple, his teeth showing as he gives a watery-eyed smile to Seokjin. "It's good to see you, Hyung." Seokjin releases you and embraces the younger member briefly. Jimin turns to you with a bittersweet look and a nickname on his lips: "C'mon, Aein. We need to go."

The exit is less than ideal. With the paps surrounding the airport, they've gotten wind of Seokjin's presence and the outburst of romantic affections between him and Min [Y/n]. They were hungry for a story before; needless to say your actions have added a shit-ton of fuel to the fire.

The ride back to the dormitory is quiet, mostly filled with soft conversation amongst the members in the car. Since Hoseok and Namjoon's enlistment is later in the week, both they and you take the car with Seokjin; the maknaes kindly offered to ride with Sejin in the following vehicle.

Your lover doesn't spare any details of his time with the military. He shares about what he's been up to recently, and how the new promotion has loosened his schedule a lot. He says he's enjoying the work surprisingly, but he is relieved to be all but three-and-a-half months done with his conscription.

When you arrive home, everyone is quick to dart into the dorms, eager to avoid any further press coverage. Sejin follows the group into the building, and you know he's going to have to play damage control for the following few days. It doesn't make you regret the decision, despite the inconvenience; you know Seokjin feels the same way when he squeezes your hand reassuringly and presses his lips to your forehead.

Once inside, everyone reunites the proper way. Hugs and laughter fill the space, each as eager as the last to embrace Bangtan's oldest brother. Hair is ruffled, giggles are drawn out, and Jungkook makes a show of picking up both Hoseok and Seokjin as they greet each other. All in all, the joy in the room is palpable; you can feel it around you like a warm blanket.

For a moment, everything is like it was before he left. All the pieces are back, and while you know Yoongi is still gone, you know his spirit is among the group tonight. You smile to yourself as you watch the boys' greetings turn to playful tussling, imagining Yoongi standing in the doorway behind you. In your mind, you see him leaning against the doorway, arms crossed, voice filled with breathy laughter at their shenanigans.

And with that image in mind, everything is as it should be.

Sejin waits quietly in the hallway as the group reunites; after a few minutes, and after everyone has settled down, he enters the living room. He gives Seokjin a pleasant smile, clearly glad to see him again. Seokjin stands, bows, and greets their manager like an hyung, and someone worthy of respect.

"I don't want to take too much time from you all," Sejin sighs, glancing sideways towards you. "But as the manager, I feel I need to at least address what just happened."

"We finally stopped lying to the world and hiding ourselves," you defend, and Seokjin's hand wraps around your wrist.

"Was that really the best idea? They didn't even know Seokjin was there, let alone that you two were together. We're going to be bombarded with questions from the press and the fans collectively. It's all they're going to want to hear from us for weeks." Sejin runs a hand over his face. "I know it's been a difficult decision to live with—"

"—Do you?" you snap, only realizing after-the-fact that it could sound rude with the tone you used.

"Honestly," Namjoon pipes up from the opposite sofa, "no one will care by the weekend. Once they get wind of our enlistment," he nods to Hoseok, "that's all that will be in the news. It will catch them all off-guard."

"And then we can deal with the questions as they come," Seokjin states firmly, his hand on your wrist tugging you into his arms and onto his lap. He rests his chin on your shoulder, sighing as if relieved to have you close again. "It's been almost five years, Manager-nim. When were we going to be able to be out like normal people?"

Sejin's gaze lowers. "Like it or not, you all aren't normal people."

"Yes, we are," Jungkook argues, his usually soft face firm with determination. "We're normal twenty-somethings, and we deserve happiness and love, no matter what form that takes. God knows Yoongi's lovers haven't been limited to women, and the fact that any of us date at all has always been an issue. But...But..."

"We're adults, and we deserve this," Taehyung echoes his younger member, putting a hand on Jungkook's shoulder.

Hoseok laughs to himself, and when everyone looks his way, he shakes his head and says, "We're Bangtan. We've been the biggest group in South Korea — and some can argue, the world — for nine years. If it ends up being that all of us finding someone to care about and spend the rest of our lives with — like Hyung and [Y/n] — is what causes our fame to temper and disappear, then I think I can be okay with that. Army wants us to be happy. Good people, the company who cares about us and the families we cherish, want us to be happy."

"We've had a good run being everyone's boys," Jimin agrees. "Maybe it's time we are true to ourselves for once."

"And let the world follow suit," Namjoon poetically concludes.

Sejin, though clearly still bothered by the prospect, nods his head in agreement. "This is going to be a fun one to explain to Bang PD, but as always, I'll plead your case."

"No pleading, and no case," you state. "This is the decision. They can get behind it, or they can find another Bangtan."

The manager chuckles under his breath, shaking his head at the victorious grin on your face. "Aish, what am I going to do with all of you?"

"Maybe protect us from Bang PD-nim," Seokjin suggests with a signature laugh. "I think I'll avoid the headquarters for this return trip."

"Oh, lucky you!"

After Sejin says his goodbyes for the night, the group continues to talk, eat, and drink late into the night and into the early hours of morning. Games are played, stories are told, semi-drunken dares are taken that lead to as much commotion and laughter as anything you've had since prior to your lover and brother's departures. Much of it is filmed or photographed for Yoongi's benefit. Between you, Taehyung, and Jungkook, you get enough footage to send to the only absent member to keep him entertained for endless days. It eases the weight of his empty chair for all the members, including his baby sister.

Eventually, one by one, the boys start to peel away and head back to their respective rooms. Taehyung and Hoseok are the first to leave, forever being the lightweights when it comes to even the most insignificant amount of alcohol. An hour later, Jimin and Jungkook help each other to their beds. Namjoon stays up the latest with you and Seokjin, having not had very much to drink between the three of you other than a glass or two of wine.

After a deep and intellectual conversation about who would win, Mario or Anpanman, the leader announces his exit and gives you both a clumsy smile and wave. "Don't stay up too late."

"Okay, Eomma," you tease, swatting his arm as he passes you. Namjoon chuckles as he heads up the stairs, leaving you and Seokjin alone to yourselves.

There's a beat of silence, and then you're tugging him closer to you, giggling as you press your mouth to his. Seokjin is just as eager, tugging you from your spot on the sofa beside him onto his lap. His hands rest on your waist as yours tangle in his short black hair. A sigh of relief slips out as he pulls you against him, closing the distance to almost nothing.

The last year, the communication aspect of your relationship had suffered little. Between the letters and calls and video chats, you heard and saw each other every single day. However, the physical portion of your love has been kept at bay for too many months. To touch and feel and kiss and embrace each other -- you hadn't been able to do that for a long time.

And it shows.

Breathless, Seokjin pulls back, chest heaving, a grin tugging at his lips. "I'm going to turn sappy, but you have no idea how often I'd imagined this."

"I figured it was the best way to get across how I've felt," you shrug playfully. "I can be fumbly with my words sometimes."

"Until you write music," he laughs, causing you to capture his mouth in another kiss. "You're gonna have to sing it for me sometime."

"I've sung it a million times for you."

"Over the phone isn't the same."

On that, you can agree.

"We have a week," you grin, tugging on the strands at the base of his neck. "I think I can do that for you."

Seokjin's gaze softens, and he pulls you back in, gently cradling your face in his palms. The warmth of him is almost intoxicating, something you haven't felt in over a year. You never knew you could miss the feel of someone so much, but having a long-distance love has proven that it's harder than you thought. Worth it, but nevertheless difficult.

The kisses that follow are sweet and soft, a bit calmer than the ones a few minutes ago. Moving your hands to his shoulders, you let him lead you to a familiar dance. After so many years together, there's not much either of you can do to surprise the other anymore. You've memorized each other's movements, and you know his love like the back of your hand. You'd heard it said that love that predictable might get stale after a while, but the truth is far from that. Not to say that you can foresee everything he does, but every word he says, every choice he makes, every move he does is wrapped in an aura of familiarity. You find immense comfort in knowing that the person you care about, and who cares about you, is true to himself. Always. Seokjin has become a pillar in your life, and you honestly cannot imagine a future without him in it.

After a moment, Seokjin pulls back, averting his eyes from yours. There's a strange look on his face, one of hesitation and questioning. It's not something you'd expect to see tonight of all nights.

"What is it?" you murmur, tapping your finger against his nose to get his attention. The tiny gesture is enough to bring his focus back on you. "You look distracted."

His brown eyes crinkle at the corners, his smile returning as you tilt your head in an animated fashion. He's told you a million times how cute he finds the movement, and it always brings a smile to his face. "I've just...really missed you, [Y/n]. A lot."

"Mmm, nope. That's not it." You shake your head and pull further away, plopping down on the cushion beside him while still keeping one arm wrapped around his shoulders to minimize the distance. "I can tell, and you're not getting any more of this," you gesture to yourself, "until you fess up, Kim."

Seokjin rolls his eyes and places his hand over your thigh, encouraging you to link your leg over his lap. You allow him that much, having always enjoyed the little touch...but you'll never tell him that. "You're so difficult, y'know that?"

You flash a wide smile, dancing your fingers along the base of his neck. "But seriously, what's going on? You got real quiet, real fast."

"I shouldn't..."

"Shouldn't what?"

Your lover's expression falls slightly, and his gaze moves away from yours to stare straight ahead. "Say anything."

"Why not?"

He heaves a sigh, "Because I'm afraid the time isn't right, and that saying what's on my mind is going to make things worse for us both."

You reach over, take his face in your hands, and force him to face you. "Don't do that," you state sternly. "I want you to tell me everything. We've never kept things from each other before, and I'm not about to start now. Bad timing or difficulty or what-the-fuck-ever: I don't care. Tell me what's on your mind. I got you, Seokjinnie."

Seokjin's worry softens, replaced by mild amusement as you release his face. "You know I love you, right?"

"Very much," you reply, heat rising into your face. "And I love you, too."

His signature grin returns as he leans in, presses his lips against yours for a brief moment, and pulls away. As he clears his throat, he shifts his body to face yours, sitting cross-legged on the sofa. His hand remains on your knee

"I know the timing isn't ideal. I know I still have time left to be away. I know this probably seems like it's coming from out of nowhere, but I'm not lying when I tell you it's been on my mind since the day I left. I—I almost asked you then, but I knew it wasn't the perfect time. Now I realize that no time is ever is, and the thought of leaving again without getting an answer...I can't do that again. So, if you'll allow me, can I ask you a very important question, [Y/n]?"

You remain still, heartbeat slowly picking up speed. Somehow, you're not afraid, and you give him a sure nod. "Of course."

Seokjin takes in a deep breath, then exhales even slower. His eyes close and open with his breathing, and he takes your hands in his own. His thumbs graze your knuckles, crooked finger clasping yours with a tender touch. You dip your head lower to catch his averted gaze, flashing a small smile to reassure him that you're listening. Your lover straightens his shoulders, expression softening into the adorable smile that always gives you butterflies, and he begins to speak.

"I know you're not the fondest of white — or dresses — but will you give me the chance to see you in one?" Seokjin tugs a small box from his pocket, pops it open, and reveals a simple yet gorgeous ring adorned with a single black diamond. "Marry me?"

Your jaw slacks at the gesture, and your eyes flicker back and forth between the ring in his hand and the nervous look on his face. A million things were flying through your mind, but they're all silent now. And in your state of awestruck, you find yourself asking a stupid question: "You really mean it?"

Seokjin throws his head back, an exasperated sound--a mix between a laugh and a sigh--slipping out. "Ahh, Jagiya! Would I have asked if I didn't?"

You throw your hands up in defense. "Look, since I was younger I never thought this was going to be my future, okay? I never thought...I didn't think I could let anyone in this close. It never occurred to me that I could be the girl who gets married."

"Is that a no?" he retorts quickly.

"No!"

"Wait, really?"

"No, that's not a no!" You cover your face with your hands, wanting nothing more than to bang your head against a wall. Seokjin is trying to be sweet and romantic, as usual--and as usual, you're ruining it. "Fucking hell."

"I didn't think it was such a difficult question," he chortles, "but if you need time, just let me know."

You drop your hands swiftly, locking eyes with him, and uttering a single word. "No."

"No, as in you have an answer? Or no, as in you n—?"

"—Yes. That first one."

"And the answer is...?"

"Yes."

He freezes. "Yes?"

"Yes!" you exclaim, a smile growing across your face. "Do I need to scream it louder?"

"I mean, we can get to that, too," he chides with a smirk.

Giving a playful eye roll, you shake off his comment with a simple retort: "Just give me the damn ring, Kim Seokjin."

He does as you ask, taking the ring from the velvet casing and slipping it onto your left ring finger. As he does, he voices a whisper of a concern, the final murmur of a nearly forgotten fear. "You're serious about this, right?"

Staring down at the glinting jewel, you reply, "I'm more serious about this than anything." Your gaze shifts up to meet his, and you raise your other hand to caress the side of his face. "I love you."

The brunet's smile widens and he leans into your touch, his fears put to ease for the final time. "I love you, too."

"Prove it."

With a mischievous glint in his eyes, Seokjin stands to his feet, scoops you into his arms, and starts the trek towards the bedroom, both of you giddy and giggly the entire way.

The next few days are bliss. Between the news you're eager to share with the boys, to the outings in Seoul with the group finally back together, it's hard not to look to the future with hope and wonder again. Even though Namjoon and Hoseok are preparing for their conscription at the end of the week, this week feels so much easier than the one prior to Seokjin's departure. That one was a mess of emotions; somehow, you're taking this one much easier.

Each of the members' reactions to the news of the engagement was perfectly in character. You and Seokjin had broken it to them the next morning after Jimin spotted the glittery addition to your ring finger. He was also the first to put it together, placing his hands over his mouth with widening eyes and a breathy gasp. Jungkook and Taehyung tilted their heads, then grinned like idiots when you announced in a high-pitched voice, "Guess who's officially joining the Kim clan!"

Hoseok dropped his spoon into his cereal bowl and stumbled over his words, while Namjoon blinked back and forth between you both. And you know that if Yoongi were here, he'd be laughing at all of them.

Everyone makes the best of the time you have together. There's definitely a trip to Lotte World, where your fiance and best friend hold tight to each of your hands the entire rollercoaster ride, and where Jungkook eats too much cotton candy and makes himself nearly sick. the day after that, Seokjin, Hoseok, and Namjoon's families travel to Seoul to see their sons, one before he returns to the military and two before they enlist. Everyone meets at Jiwoo's home downtown, being the perfect central location for a multi-family reunion. While there were some tears shed, it does your heart good to see that most of the day and late into the night is spent in joyful company, full of laughter and great stories.

You also make it a point to get the band under the same roof for a hearty meal and karaoke the night before Namjoon and Hoseok's departure, just like the good old days. This particular tradition is owed to Kim Seokjin alone. Even when Bangtan was just beginning, and there wasn't a lot of money to go around, you always admired that Seokjin encouraged mealtimes to be a constant pillar of support. He'd cook up a feast, and it brought everyone closer in those turbulent first years. It's something you continue to do as a group, even as a company at times, to this very day. Namjoon is his usual self, breaking one of the mics halfway through his epic performance, and Taehyung and Hoseok have a rap battle on one of their childhood favorites. The final night leaves everyone in a lighter mood than they've been in in months.

That night sets the mood for the next day. You wake next to Seokjin, knowing immediately what's about to happen. You'd slept terribly, despite feeling much more at ease than last time. It's still a goodbye, even if just for a little while, and you'll miss the '94s terribly. You'll miss Namjoon's unconventional wisdom and passive sense of humor, but also the peace and clarity he brings to every situation he's in. You'll miss Hoseok's lighthearted nature and sunshine outlook on life, but also the care and motherly warmth he exudes. They might be your brother's bandmates, but they were as much your brothers as they were his.

Having said that, this goodbye is easier. The event leading up to the departure goes well, and luckily the reporters were none the wiser at their conscription date and location. Both of the elder members are at peace with the situation, and this car ride isn't as silent as the last. Even as you pull up to the training facility, you can feel your heart pang against your ribs. Seokjin keeps a calming hand on your waist the whole time.

When it's time for final farewells, they aren't as bitter as last time. Seokjin and the maknaes huddle around the boys, encasing them in the biggest group hug they can manage. Their families also give them tight embraces, Namjoon's mother getting teary eyed, and Hoseok's sister pinching her little brother's cheek in a sentimental way.

When it comes time for you to say goodbye, you bring them both in at once, one arm around each of their necks. They crane over to hug you back, and you feel a sigh escape from both of them.

"I'll miss you," you murmur.

"Write to us, okay?" Namjoon asks, patting your back soothingly.

Nodding into his shoulder, you chuckle, "Can't promise it'll be as eloquent as you, but I'll write as often as I can."

"If we're lucky enough that our letters make it to them on tour," Hoseok laughs.

"Mail them to Sejin, and he'll get them to us somehow. The man is a magician." You pull away and glance up at the members, giving both a watery smile. "Be safe, promise?"

They mirror your request, and after a few final words, they're called back to the group and escorted off to their comrades. Even as they disappear from sight, you lean against Jiwoo's shoulder, knowing how it feels to see your brother walking through those doors.

"It gets easier," you murmur.

She nods affirmatively, heaving a heavy sigh. "I know it will. Just hurts right now."

After a short intermission, everyone begins to go their separate ways. The families return to their homes, and the maknaes go back to the dorms.

Seokjin and you head to your private apartment, shuffling through the door with silence as a companion. Your fiance reaches for your hand and twists his fingers around yours, keeping you from heading further through the dark corridor.

"Are you okay?"

Turning towards him, you heave a sigh and nod once. "Yeah, surprisingly, I'm okay this time."

"Are you sure?"

"You can still tell when I'm bothered, can't you?"

Seokjin's smile is soft as he flips the light switch, bringing the apartment back into the light. "Of course. I just...wanted to make sure." He shrugs his shoulders. "It's just you and the maknaes now."

A bittersweet expression covers your face, and you rest your chin on his arm, staring up at him. "We can handle it. Got a plan and it'll only be for a few more months until you and Yoongi are back. I mean, I don't like it, and I miss them already, but I don't think it's going to break me anymore. I'm braver and stronger now."

"I know. I've seen the change, and I'm really proud of you, Min [Y/n]." He presses a kiss to your hairline, and his voice softens. "Really, really proud."

Scrunching up your nose at the sickly sweet compliment and gesture, you pull away and tug his hand, as if telling him to come with you. "Having said that, I'm hungry and tired. All I want right now is some teokbokki, something nostalgic like Princess Mononoke, and cuddles. And preferably, for the rest of the weekend. I don't want to think about saying another goodbye right now, no matter how temporary."

Seokjin's infectious laughter fills the room, and he follows your lead towards the kitchen. "Well, we can definitely arrange that." He pulls you back into him, using your eagerness against you, and nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck. His arms wrap around your torso, cradling your back against his chest. "Until the weekend is over, you have me."

"Then hold me until it is, promise?"

"I've already made the promise that lasts a lifetime. I think I can handle one more weekend.”

Taglist — @joyful-jimin​​​​, @gracehiii​​​, @live-2-fangirl​​​, @rjsmochii​​​​, @btsnatalena

[seungminotes]

A Walk Home 

best friends to lovers w/ Kim Seungmin

a/n: I'm back from my hiatus and happy to say that I really like this piece tho it got kinda dramatic lmao hope you like it too! Always feel free to leave feedback!

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: cursing (like twice?) / gender neutral (please tell me if I messed up with something) / sort of slow-burn and not much payoff but I'd like to think it's very fluffy throughout!

"What took you so long today? I've been waiting here for at least 5 minutes," Seungmin complained at the sight of you finally approaching him. 

It usually didn't take you this long to reach him from your last class, heck sometimes he even had to drink water and you'd get to your usual meeting spot before him. 

Seungmin wasn't particularly the best at waiting on others, for whatever the reason really, he would have probably left anybody else behind by now. But alas, it was you he had been waiting for, and if facing the possibility of having to wait even longer for you, he most likely would. 

"Sorry, I had to talk to someone before leaving," you smiled at your friend, who was now pouting slightly.

You reached up to pinch his cheeks only for him to slap your hands away. 

"No pinching, let's go," he grabbed your wrist, dragging you in the direction of your usual route home. 

You'd known Seungmin for nearly six years now. Having met him when you both were in middle school after moving to the then new town, Seungmin had once been quite fickle towards you, but once he got over his initial disinterest, he realized you were quite special. You'd spotted him taking pictures of the daisies in his front lawn and annoyed him to no end to explain his interest in them. You remember the day vividly, especially now that the firm grip Seungmin held on your wrist highly resembled the same he held on that very first day you met him. 

-

"Aren't daisies a bit plain?" You snuck up behind the boy crouching in an awkward position, clutching his camera so tight his fingers were losing color. 

Seungmin held no reaction to the sudden appearance of someone around his own age spying on him from the sidewalk in front of his own home. In fact, he sighed with a tinge of annoyance at your unwithheld statement and hardly looked up at you, why couldn’t people mind their own business, he thought to himself. 

"I find them quite interesting, actually." He deadpanned, no intention of expanding upon his opinion to someone who he already deemed to be unworthy of his time.

Damn Seungmin was quite stubborn back then, he had barely even glanced at you, but good thing you were quite nosy. 

"How come?" You inquired further. 

Thirteen-year-old Seungmin was not in the mood to explain the complexities of a perfectly amazing daisy to someone who would most likely not care as much as he did about capturing their beauty. 

Nonetheless, he glanced back to where he had seen you standing to notice your figure now hunched over, examining a daisy closely, nose almost touching it's petals, as your lips parted slightly to blow softly onto the flower, clearly in your own little world.

Your rather odd gestures told him you may actually be interested in what could possibly be interesting about the small flowers sparse all over his lawn. 

He slowly approached you, more aware of your presence than before, and snapped God knows how many photos of your posing.

That was at least until he saw your hand reach up to pick the delicate flower from its stem. That’s where he drew the line! Promptly walking over to you and tightly withholding your hand with his awkward grip on your wrist. 

You’d taken the opportunity to look into his big, brown eyes and examine his now blushed face, ultimately deciding this boy was inexplicably ethereal. You could drown in the deepness of his irises and the urge to pinch his pouty cheeks was overpowering your own sense of respectfulness to this stranger. 

-

You remember how he later apologized and  quietly explained to you the meaning of daisies. After bringing out two peanut butter jelly sandwiches from the kitchen onto his porch, where the both of you shared the lunch, he began to ramble on to you about the perfections of a simple flower that was not so simple at all and it's symbolism of true love. 

And from that very moment on, you knew you had fallen in love with Kim Seungmin, the nerd next door who explained the very composition of flowers to you over a sandwich at age 13. 

And unbeknownst to you, Kim Seungmin had developed a disgustingly soft spot in his heart for his absent-minded  new friend next door. 

-

Nothing much had changed now. You were still hopelessly in love with Seungmin, who was as focused as ever on his studies and baseball team activities just six years later. 

-

The memory and realization fade just as soon as it came to you with Seungmin's grip on your wrist, which now that you look back down was still quite firm about a minute into your usual walk home. 

Though you could almost guarantee it wasn't anything intentionally done by Seungmin, it didn't fail to put a stupid smile on your face. 

So far Seungmin had noticed your rather quiet disposition, something he deemed off about you.

"Are you okay?" He asked. 

"Perfectly fine," you grinned, narrowing your eyes into happy crescents as you lifted the arm that currently clinged Seungmin's own hand, much to his embarrassment. 

He'd quickly released your arm at your teasing, opting to scratch the back of his head as he scoffed. 

"Who'd you stay to talk with today?" He asked. You'd assumed he was simply trying to change the subject from his embarrassment, but in fact, the thought of who you could have possibly spent just five minutes with after school had been eating him alive for the past minute. You had never made him wait, at least not without some sort of warning.

"Just a guy in my chem class, I met him by my locker on the way out," you responded, not giving your answer much thought. 

"What did he want?" He asked again. 

Seungmin sure had been asking an awful lot today. 

"Don't be so nosy, Seungmin! It really doesn’t suit you. It doesn't really matter much anyway. And how do you know I wasn't the one who wanted something from him, huh?" You teased him slightly, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

"Can't I ask about the whereabouts of my best friend when they leave me out in the hot, melting sun waiting for them!" He teased back, stopping in his tracks to begin to poke your sides harshly.

"Fine, fine, fine!" You give in. "Just stopppppp," you shook his hands away.

"Hyunjin offered to tutor me in chem. I'm officially failing," you laugh off, "he wanted to ask what days we should schedule our study sessions for." You explained.

"Wait, Hyunjin? As in Hwang Hyunjin? The pretty one?" Seungmin's eyes widen at the thought of a rather good looking and outgoing guy offering you tutoring lessons out of the goodness of his heart, he almost scoffs out loud. 

"Stop asking so many questions, Min!" You softly punch his arm, bursting his thought bubble. 

"Besides, 'the pretty one', Min? I didn't know you liked Hyunjin like that? Want me to put in a good word for you?" You teased further, laughing at his choice of words. Sure, Hyunjin was pretty well known by most for his good looks, but he had simply offered you help in your studies in a subject he happened to excel in and that had no such thing to do with his looks. 

"Shut up," he rolled his eyes, taking his turn to lightly punch you back from before. 

Afterwards the walk fell to a comfortable silence between the two of  you. 

At least that was how you would describe it to be. While you happily hummed and thought of what snacks you could whip up once you got home, Seungmin seriously pondered why you hadn't told him you weren't doing so well in chemistry. Or why you hadn't come to him for help first, he had already taken the class after all? And why the very thought of Hwang Hyunjin being with you by your locker afterschool while he had to wait outside for you made him so uncomfortable. Was uncomfortable the right word in this situation? He thought some more and concluded the thought of Hyunjin near you at all made him exceptionally mad, not just uncomfortable, for whatever the reason may have been (though he did have a hunch as to why he was feeling this way).

You looked over at the quiet boy next to you, noticing his intense state of thought, as he harshly bit his lower lip, furrowed his eyebrows slightly and kept an adamant gaze ahead of him. The sight was quite cute actually, cute enough to make you laugh. 

"Earth to Kim Seungmin, you are wanted here immediately, please report for duty," you giggled, dramatically waving your arm in front of his face to snap him out of his daze. 

"Sorry," Seungmin suddenly looks at you, cheeks hot and hands clenched onto the straps of his backpack. 

His gaze is not like anything you'd ever seen come from him. It looks serious, yet almost sad? The way his eyes look glossed over have you wanting to kiss his cheeks and lift the corners of his mouth to reveal his signature smile, the one you love so much.

But you know better than to let your imagination get the best of you and you quickly shake your head to get rid of such thoughts about your best friend in his very presence.

"No worries, just talk to me if you need to, okay?" You reach over to comfort him, rubbing his arm softly in assurance of your words. 

Little did you know you were killing Seungmin RIP. 

You were now approaching your front porch, ready to whip out your keys and say home sweet home. Seungmin always came over for a bit after school to talk and mess around a bit before starting homework and today was no different. 

But just as you opened the door with the thought about what video game Seungmin would want to play today floating in your head, you noticed the boy had yet to move from the step of the porch. 

"Seungmin? Don't you want to come in?" You walked back over to him, choosing to stay standing on the step above him. 

"Y/n," he practically whispered. 

Suddenly, at this close proximity, you realize the tension in his face and the worry behind his eyes and the burning of his cheeks. 

You softly reach over and unclasp one of Seungmin's hands from the strap of his bag, taking his hand into your own and rubbing your thumb over his numb knuckles for comfort. 

"Are you okay Minnie? Do you need water? Are you sick?" You reach up to his forehead with your other hand to check his temperature. 

"No, I just think I need to tell you something, now." He spoke formally, no hint of his usual teasing or playfulness when it came to you. 

You could only nod at his strange current state, you were quite concerned. 

"Don't take Hyunjin's help." He stated firmly, as if reading it from a list of rules. His serious disposition did not falter one bit, as if he had given out the most simple order. 

"Is this what this is about? Min, how am I supposed to pass that dumb class. Seungmin I'm failing, like with an F, I know you don't know what that's like, but neither did I until now and I have to fix it somehow! We can't all be straight A students without even having to try!" You were practically tearing up at the intensity of which your words came out, you'd slightly lost control of your emotions in the moment, but Seungmin remained calm through the sharp words you threw, knowing you were simply frustrated with your grades and held no ill intentions with them. 

"I can help you study, I can stay with you at the library all day explaining it to you if I have to, I'll take notes on your textbook and give them to you. Why didn't you tell me you needed help sooner?" He looked at you even more intensely, if that were even possibly. Then reaching over, he held your free hand in his own free hand. 

At this point the worry in his eyes only made you want to hug him for the rest of your life, but there was so much tension surrounding the two of you right now.

"Min, you don't have to do that. If you don't want me getting help from Hyunjin, I won't. I trust you. But you don't have to waste your time being my teacher, trust me on that, you'll regret it." You attempt to laugh off your answer while swinging his hands in yours to lighten the mood, even if it's just a bit. Unfortunately, your teary eyes from your previous outburst give you away as a tear rolls down your cheek. 

Seungmin was unsure about how to go about this further. He wasn't sure how you didn't seem to get it? That he would sacrifice his sleep to help you pass a class, just so he could be the one to help you, not some Hwang Hyunjin. That he wouldn't hesitate to do anything, and he means anything, if you simply asked. That he currently had more photos of you on his camera and phone than he did selfies of himself. That he liked you for fuck's sake. How could you have not seen it in his blushy mess of a nervous state right now. Was he really that freaking deep in the friendzone? 

"I want to waste my time teaching you chemistry because I know I won't regret it. Because I'd never regret time spent with you." His words remained calm and precise, again as if he had prepared them and read them off a notecard. He looked down at his shoes, unable to confront you after the cheesy words left his mouth. 

He felt his hands begin to moisten with sweat in your grasp and tried to remove them from your hands. However he was met with your refusal, as your hands tightly gripped his own. 

"Kim Seungmin, I like you. Like really like you. Like, like-like you. And you cannot say those things to me and be protective of me and be cheesy with me and expect me not to want to just hug you and kiss you as if we weren't just best friends!" You blurted, in a sing-song whine much like your usual tone with your best friend.

You took in a very long breath of frustration and looked down as well. 

You were so caught up in thoughts of the implications of the words that had left your mouth so quickly, that you did not bother to notice how Seungmin had in fact perked up at your words and practically resembled a tomato at this point, not that you looked any less of the shade of red.

“Wait what????” Seungmin was awestruck from your outburst, was he hallucinating? This was not the time for his imagination. 

“There is no way, I’m repeating that,” you pouted.

“Not even if, I tell you I feel the same?” Seungmin smiled.

“Maybe after…” you swung your intertwined hand again.

“After ….?” he mocks

Seungmin suddenly closes the already small distance between the two of you and lands his soft lips just barely on the surface of your cheek. 

“Can you say it again now?” he teases. 

All tension dispelled, the mood is suffocating with the puppy love-struck expressions emitting from both your eyes. 

- 

“Seungmin, how can you kiss me before you even tell me you like me?” 

You’re both inside now, after your apparently long-awaited confession, Seungmin had decided a cuddle session was called for in celebration, not that you were complaining. 

“I thought it was just obvious?” Seungmin replies 

“We could have been dating for so long by now,” You both sigh to one another at the thought you’d both had looming in your heads for the past hour.

“Guess we’ll just have to make up for lost time,” Minnie nuzzles his head into your neck trying to hide from his own sly remark. 

“Can we study chem now though, I’m still failing,” You whisper into his ear, the notion of that failing grade still very much prominent in your head. 

“In a bit, do you know how long I’ve waited for this?” The arms around your waist tighter their loose grip and Seungmin pulls you even closer to him, enough to feel the warmth emitting from his chest and suddenly you thought chem could wait.

[kirstinmaldonado]

CHAPTER EIGHT 2.0

>>Delayed post because birthday week had all the friend surprises and snuggles and I got a bit distracted but…still wanted to post<<

It’s my birthdayyyy week~! My biiiiiiirthday week!

The dreaded time has come? The anticipated event is here? Honestly 28 felt so far away for quite some time, I’m kinda in denial that one, it’s May already and two, I’m going to be 28 this Saturday!!

So far I’ve been filling the week with cuddles, some friends and family calls, and oooo another BESTIE PRODUCTIONS vid?!? We had planned on releasing earlier, but why the rush? Why take the joy out of creating for fun by setting deadlines that don’t really matter? 

Anyway, we hope you love it! It’s always important to unite and spread some relatable cheer especially in such a divisive climate! More on that coming…I don’t mean to do it but…soon. Lots of moving parts and our lives are picking up in different and amazing ways but we still hope to get it out!

Phew. No hashtags here! ;)

So many events happened over the last few days, good and bad! Some even that I am disappointed in, ashamed of, or at a loss for. But! This week is all about self-care! I’ll save the heavy for another time. ;)

Self-care, in its many facets, is so important! Self-care is making healthy food choices to nurture your body so it can be at optimal output. Self-care is strengthening and nourishing your mind by learning something new, doing a hobby you love, meditating, or just purely relaxing. It’s having the awareness to say no when you don’t want to do something or you know the adverse is better for you. Really, self-care is ALL ABOUT YOU!

Biggest of all, self-care is NOT selfish! Everyone needs to be self-aware and know when to take some personal time. Everyone decompresses in different ways. Sometimes that’s choosing an introverted quiet night as opposed to an extroverted one, or splurging on something to make you feel special, or baking way too many cupcakes and eating also way too many (if you’re me, ha)!!

With all the rushing around and intensity we’ve trained our minds and bodies to endure, with all the added stress of not even wanting, but NEEDING to succeed and flourish, that self-care dwindles. Sometimes it feels like you have to put YOU aside because everything else is so overwhelming!

I remember in the past thinking that skin-care took such a loooong time and felt not worth it. My skin (thank you, Mother) was pretty damn flawless for how (wrongly) I’d been taking care of it, so why bother?

That was before I met my sweet Klara!! And while my skin wasn’t in desperate emergency levels of fixing, she reminded me that pre-meditative care is crucial and so is slowing down and taking the time for myself! 

Klara and I met years ago when I was in NYC looking for a lash lift. Pentatonix had just started taking off and just recently Klara had opened her own med-spa in the city. We bonded instantly and have been friends ever since!! 

Meanwhile, if you live in NYC and want the best lash lift ever, ya gotta go to Klara, HANDS DOWN! 

Every time Pentatonix would be in NYC, I would go visit her. Even if I didn’t need anything done or didn’t have the time, I would stop in and say hello because that is the type of beautiful energy she is! And slowly, we began growing together!

I love my friendship with her because not only did she love on my eyelashes, skin, face, etc and teach me how to do the same at home, but she’s been there through the last six or so years of my life! I have transformed into a much more self-aware, happier, and self-comfortable person and I treasure her sincerity, compassion, and late night chats so so much!!

Although I don’t get to see Klara all the time as she is based in NYC, I always have other forms of self-care in a similar vein. As we all know, Covid has shut down pretty much all forms of outside self-care treatments, although someone should tell the people in charge that self-care is essential, eh?!

I kid. Jokes aside, I miss relaxing my body and mind to a caregiver. I miss getting my hair done, getting a mani-pedi, tanning, and getting a massage! I miss that “treat yo self” feeling, and drinking champagne while doing them all, ha!

So, for my birthday week, I wanted to share with you a fun DIY self-care facial curated by Klara herself! My chin has been OUT OF CONTROL and colonizing a little zit farm, so freshening up before my big day (inside lol) felt perfect!!

Since she initially sent me this, she has curated a NEW personalized facial package that she will guide you through on Zoom, but regardless she is an angel for all your skin questions and needs!

>>By the way now that this is posted a week later…my skin has NO JOKE been FLAWLESS! Klara is still a queen for the win but also loving on your face and listening to what it needs also FTW<<

So here I am au natural, pre-peel!! 

ONE. PREPARE YOUR STATION! PUT NICE MUSIC ON, A CANDLE, WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO PROMOTE A RELAXING VIBE! HAVE A CLEAN COUNTER WHERE YOU CAN PLACE THE DENTAL BIB AND LAY EVERYTHING OUT! 

TWO. WASH YOUR HANDS! ;) 

THREE. USE JAR #1 WITH FIRST CLEANSER, ADD WATER, FOAM, BE PRECISE AROUND JAW AND EARS ETC, RINSE, PAT DRY.

FOUR. REPEAT THE SAME WITH JAR WITH CLEANSER #2 (THE CREAM, IT WILL NOT FOAM) RINSE AND DRY

>>Already my face is feeling much softer!<<

FIVE. POUR THE MINI CHEMICAL PEEL (VIAL #3) ONTO COTTON PAD, WIPE WHOLE FACE GENTLY! I EXPERIENCED THE TINGLING AND EEE YES MY FACE GOT RED, BUT NOTHING MAJOR! LEAVE ON FOR 3/5 MIN!

SIX. USE JAR #4 (GLYCOLIC CLEANSER), RINSE AND DRY.

SEVEN. THEN APPLY SERUMS (JUST FEW DROPS) ALL OVER THE FACE

EIGHT. MASQUE FOR 10 MIN. 

NINE. MOISTURIZE!

HAPPY GIRL! I felt AMAZING, y’all!!

You can check out Klara’s ZOOM FACIAL PACKAGE here and on social media outlets! And I am NOT kidding, my skin was SO SOFT!!! I felt less bumpy, less exposed! And it’s stayed like that too! 

This little self-love moment put me in the perfect headspace for a birthday weekend, especially when that weekend was not according to plan! Life is about continuously adapting, taking what you have in front of you, and trying to make the best of the situations you are presented! You can only control so much! So why not focus on positivity?

I was so thankful for this little pick me up that made me feel good about being in my skin, something I’ve struggled on and off with the entire rest of quarantine! But overall I am SO thankful for how special my friends, my boyfriend, my family, YOU GUYS all made me feel! I didn’t feel devoid of any of your love and care. And thank you so much for that!!!

28 has started out so special in some (feeling) unspecial circumstances. I will always rise and fall and even have so far in these mere hours of 28! But I am so happy for your support. Just remember to always support yourself too! 

So on that note, I hope you find time before the month is done for some EXTRA self-care!!!

And happy 3 years to Break a Little <3

Love you all!

[imnotwolverine]

The Englishman JACK - CHAP 1

Chap 1 The Name Is Jack | Chap 2 >

Summary: Jack travels to his new employer and Bunny tries to get away.

Word count: 4.657 (17 min. read)

Disclaimers: Strong language, misogyny, mention of relationship with great age gap, lots of cigarettes and “the thrill of the chase”.

--

Call Me Jack

--

Lipstick stains and cigarette buds were all that was left of her. The woman who made him into a man. The room he stood in now felt strangely unwelcoming. Like he was a stain himself. Black and bold in this lavish palace of beige and gold, on the top floor of the Parisian Grande.

The smog of cigar smoke and traffic jams was rising up through the ceiling-height windows, starting yet another day in this crazy paradise called Paris. The city had somehow always felt pompous to him, just like this apartment. Buffed gold furniture, heavy beige curtains, the scent of patchouli and sex lingering deep in its essence. It was the french way, she would have said. But she was no longer here. And he was not here to stay.

Thumbing over the precious jewels that had once graced her stretched out earlobes and wrinkled swan neck, he remembered the time he had accidentally teared one of these off. She had simply laughed at his eagerness. But he had felt great shame, crawling around on the beige carpet to look for one of the missing pearls.

I’ll buy a new one, my boy.

My boy. Years had passed since then. Since that moment. And she had made her boy into a man.

All he now had to do, was avenge her.

--

It was the same thing each and every morning, it seemed. The metal bullet shells chinked as they were cleaned away by the butler on the next terrace. With heavy strokes of the broom the morning silence was broken. But the world didn’t seem to mind. All was quiet. The birds were hushed, the sun was struggling and wisps of mist drifted lazily over the rolling Tuscan hills. Like the Italians themselves, nothing here seemed to be eager to get started with the new day.

Even the three bodyguards that were stationed on the far edges of the porch seemed to be more asleep than awake. Dressed in their sharp black suits they rose from the mists like great Greek statues, squared shoulders turned to stare out in the distance. What they were looking at exactly, was anybody’s guess; for the next 10 miles or so, the land was pretty much entirely owned by Bunny’s family, the Maniari’s.

Sighing quietly, Bunny sat back in her black and white cushioned chair, making the mists curl away for a moment. The northern porch hardly had the best view; a large wall hid most of the gorgeous landscape. But it was all she was allowed in terms of “freedom” as she had her breakfast session out here in the morning chill. As usual she was dressed to a tee, floral blue sundress and pretty magazine-style hair indicating she had been up at least a few hours already.

She was so very different from her family, who wouldn’t wake before the sun was high and the remnants of last night’s “hunting games” were cleaned and cleared. In fact she was..bored. Was a woman of her station even allowed to be bored? Here be Bunny, the ridiculously rich and perfectly cared for mobster misses! Bunny, the woman who had it all but wanted even more! She snickered to herself. Would the wax melt off her wings if she too would try to touch the sun? Just out of mere curiosity whether it would hurt? Would she drown in the seas and for once be done with this? This..this...ugh.

Knowing she was no Icarus by any means - it was the lack of waxen wings on her back, she figured, she flicked back some of her brown locks. The men who stood on the far ends of the porch seemed truly dazed today. A rough night perhaps? Having finished her last bite of marmalade on toast - also so very un-italian, she tapped the ash of her cigarette onto the ashtray next to her plate.

Would they notice if she’d fly off? It was a good question to pose in a world where men turned a blind eye on so many things. Squinting her eyes, Bunny took another long suck of the ashen delight between her fingertips. These men truly did seem blind. Or at least sleepy. Heads were hanging slightly limp and from the soft beeps coming from Number One’s walkie talkie, it was clear he was definitely not paying attention.

Her father had once said that these men were stationed near her for safekeeping. But Bunny knew better. She knew they were just as much here to keep her from running off. Away from this golden cage with its marble floors and far too expensive crystal chandeliers. But these poor men couldn’t help it either. They probably had played a late night of poker with Big - something you simply couldn’t win even if you had all the good cards in your hand. Life simply wasn’t fair like that. Not here at least.

Quietly slipping from her chair, her dress brushing through the mists, Bunny snuck back inside - to get out.

These dresses are only getting shorter, huh? With a devious little smirk Jack settled back in the cushioned airplane seat. He watched as one of the flight attendants shuffled by with her demure little smile. The plane was about to take off, heavy engines rumbling on the taxi strip. But first, he’d let one of these sky angels do the honours. And, looking up, apparently the lady of choice had come to her calling. Italian presumably, he saw her lips curl in a semi-flirty smile.

‘Good afternoon.’ - Her French accent was horrid. ‘May I please assist you with your seatbelt?’ She was already leaning over before Jack could object. Not that he would. Settling back a little more, he let her tiny hands clutch around the metal clasp. It was a challenge to get the thing tugged around his luggy hips. But he didn’t protest as she bent over a little more. If anything, he let the opportune moment run its course as the taxiing plane rolled over a pesky little bump. Enough for him to bump into her in consequence, the little accident followed up by a polished act of surprise on his end. A warm, steadying hand on her hip was all it took to turn the woman into a blushing, flustered mess. She chuckled and apologised with that same awful little accent.

Not that he cared. With a suave, calm smile he settled back, thanking her in perfect Italian. And with that the deal was sealed; he had ensured that this flight would be just as delightful as this woman’s dress implied..

You know what they say. Can’t let a good thing get away.

‘Found anything?’

The two men stepped into the beams of the car’s headlights. The night around them was muddled black, heavy rain clouds obscuring the skies. It was one of those moments where a seeing man could feel blind. Though these men didn’t seem to be concerned with the dark. Sharing a handshake, muddied feet slushing in the red earth, they greeted one another. One of them showed a slight limp.

‘No -’ The limping man coughed raggedly. ‘Nothing.’

‘And the footprints?’

‘Dead end.’ His cough continued and he spat on the ground, bloody mucus seeping into the crimson soil.

‘Brother..’

‘We’ll find ‘em. Just give me more time.’

The other wished to object, but a soft crack in the bushes on their left disturbed them. Someone was there. An intruder. Hidden in that pesky veil of night. With a grumble the healthy man grabbed for his gun. But the limping men stopped him.

‘Brother? Let me..!’

A church bell rang in the distance, silencing them. Twelve times the heavy copper tolled, announcing midnight, and the end of their fleeting meeting.

‘Whomever it was, we can’t chase ‘em.’ The limping man sighed. ‘And rain’s comin’.’ He coughed again and grasped the other man’s sleeve. ‘Let’s go. Ghosts aren’t worth bullets.’

Was there something like the thrill of being chased? Bunny clutched the steering wheel of her trusty blue cake tin on wheels, squealing with excitement as it slipped in the puddles of last night’s thunderstorm.

Much like the weather - the air now clean and fresh, she felt a renewed energy in her bones. This could very well be the time she’d succeed. The time she’d finally get away.

She had omitted all the non-essentials. She had learned by now that it was key to not act suspicious. Learn the patterns and only then take the leap.

The last time had failed catastrophically. Apparently she had been too obvious with her packed suitcase at the ready. Not even a lie about a personal safety plan with all the gang violence going on was enough to dissuade her father from her intentions. She could still feel the ache in her buttocks from the spanking she had received.

So yes. She had learned. She had learned to be more inventive. And now here she was. Smirking. With a sideglance she looked to the backseat of her trusty little Fiat. A small designer bag lay there discarded. Barely noticeable to the male eye, but packing much more than just the usual feminine essentials. In fact this bag held none of the usual make-up items and hair spray. It held passports, roadmaps, money and a well-thought out escape plan. She was ready. She was. Right?

Clutching the steering wheel a little tighter, she looked back at the road. And just in time. With a panicked foot on the brakes she slid through the mud, barely managing to evade the unamused looking vintager who had just stepped onto the road after inspecting his vineyard.

‘Fuck.’ Bunny muttered quietly, keeping the slower speed long enough to raise an apologising hand at the man. It was the new one. The new vintager, the other one deceased some years ago. The other wine makers had refused to take on this piece of land. And none would say it aloud, but the reasoning was simple; it was the only small trip of land that separated the Maniari estate from the Luchesse estate. Two mobster powerhouses trying their best to overrule the other; you simply didn’t want to be in the middle of that.

And now Bunny had nearly killed the one person who had dared to take on the challenge.

Trying her best to calm her racing heart, Bunny looked back to the road ahead of her. She couldn’t make a mistake now. Not when she was so close to getting out. So close to freedom. Because that’s what she wanted, right? She was ready, right? Clutching the steering wheel she pushed the gas pedal a little deeper again, forgetting for a hot minute to look back. And in doing so, she missed one essential little cue in the shape of a rushing car behind her.

The thrill of the chase was back.

Jack gritted his teeth. Not even the lovebites in his neck or the linger of sweet perfume could calm his nerves. He was hours away from Florence. Hours away from pretty city women, good coffee and proper infrastructure - the roads all red mud around here.

Jack was also not sure whether this rental he had received from that car dealer was set up for failure, or that it was just misfortune that had killed the engine. Either way: he was stuck. Stuck in an idyllic picture of green winelands covered in a thick blanket of ethereal mists. A dreamscape, the likes he had seen on postcards sent by his good friend Luigi. Those cards had often described trivial things, until a week ago, when Jack received a request. And if it weren’t for their friendship, it would be for his own devices that Jack found this trip to Tuscany to be a perfect way to spend some time. One plane ride, car drive and engine failure he was here. Stuck as a bug in a rug. Or in this case stuck with a car in the mud.

‘Fuck.’ He grumbled, turning off the radio that was bleating on about some local seismic activity. He wished right now he had accepted Luigi’s offer to have him chauffeured to the estate. But Jack was a proud man, and a man of resolve. Besides, he enjoyed driving in most cases. It gave a sense of freedom, of power. Engines rumbling, the windows rolled down.

But that would be for another time. First he had to find a new means of transportation.

Swinging open the door he stepped out into the morning mists, nostrils flaring out to breath in the biting cold that licked around his heated skin. Perhaps he shouldn’t have worn his fine calf leather shoes, he mused, looking down at the mud splatters as they painted a red dotted work of art over the recently polished noses.

Gritting his teeth again he cued a cigarette to his lips and turned around the back of the car, picking up his suitcase and hat before starting his way down to the nearest village.

Bunny knew she had failed when she turned the roundabout. With a flash of black and white the sleek suit of Number Four was hard to miss from behind his steering wheel. And he was far too close for comfort. Especially with him driving the Mercedes-Benz, its engine rumbling like a dark horse to match his steely gaze.

Taking a swift turn, Bunny changed plans. Straight roads were omitted and made way for the local Saturday market, her car soon disappearing in the hustle and bustle of cows, chickens, cabbages and coffee.

Nervous hands thrummed on her steering wheel as she moved at a snail’s pace through the meandering crowds. It was terribly busy, and that made the market both a blessing and a curse all in one. Old nans with hunchbacks, young children playing soccer, farmers marketing their produce; any other time this would have been a lovely place to be. But right now Bunny had no time to wait for the cows before her to cross the street. And so with a quick flick of the wrist she escaped her car, bag in her hand as her swift feet zipped past the meaty backsides of two brown cows before she vanished into the misty morning mayhem.

Her heartbeat was racing. Fluttering like a little bird caught in too small a cage. Sweaty hands clutched onto the bag in her arms as she apologised to a leather faced man she bumped into, his large chest already puffing up before he turned to scold her for not “using her godgiven eyes”.

‘Scusi!’ She scampered away, little mules clicking on the paved village square. She had made sure that, though practical, her clothes wouldn’t have raised any suspicion on her family’s part. And with her always wearing something rather fashionable, today was no exception. Her calf-length blue summer dress waved around her legs as she brushed past the flower stall sales men, their hands waving around in the air to catch her attention.

‘Miss! Miss! Why the hurry?! Good morning, good morning!’

She wished to throw them a wistful smile, but her eye caught on to a blur of a neat suit on the other side of the square instead. Another mobster? Really?! Keeping her green eyes transfixed on the man who was trying to chat up with one of the salesmen, she noted he was different from the others. Brown suit covered up to his calves in mud and with his handsome face contorting in agony, she saw him turn away from the salesman. She had never seen this man before. He looked foreign, his skin far less tan than most Italians and his eyes a shade of Mediterranean blue. He could very well be one of the American movie hunks she used to fawn over. Cary Grant, Humprey Bogart. His slicked back dark hair and chiseled cheeks by no means inferior to the legends of the silver screens.

But there was no silver screen here. And Bunny had no time for funny business. She had to figure out what to do. Go home and act like nothing happened? Try again later? Or get out on foot and hope that her father’s henchmen wouldn’t use their bloodhound like noses to track her down. 

Feeling cold shivers run up her spine she wished to grasp for her bag, only to realise it was no longer hanging down her hip. There went the last of her plans. Washed down the drain, like the fish scales washed by the fishmonger behind the tall, handsome stranger. Who, strangely enough, had disappeared.

‘Good morning signora.’ A warm honeyed voice brushed past the shell of her ear and without looking, Bunny darted off. Did Number Four get backup? Or was it one of them? Fuck-fuck-fuck. With hasted feet she pushed past a group of women doing their daily shopping, disturbed eyes looking her up and down before they stepped aside for the mobster daughter’s pursuer.

‘GET OFF ME!’ Bunny exclaimed when she felt a hand on her arm, her hands raising up to throw in a punch if need be. But it wasn’t Number Four who stared back at her. It were heavy dark eyebrows, risen near comically onto the handsome stranger’s face.

‘I am..profusely sorry milady! I…’ Blue eyes blinked at her before he reached out a familiar item to her: her bag. Bunny exhaled. It was just her bag. Her bag! Her.. She snapped her eyes back at him. Who was this?

‘Thanks.’ She grabbed for the bag, only to see his hand wrap a little more tightly around the tan leather.

‘Wait a moment…’ He narrowed his eyes and terror was back in Bunny’s bones. Fuck. Was he with them?! She tugged a little more fiercely on the bag, but it didn’t budge. Oh please let go! Please let go! She pulled and pulled, but she was no match to the hidden muscles beneath the man’s well-cut suit. He smirked.

‘Are you..the Maniari sister?’ His accent finally clicked; foreign indeed. British, most likely. Was it the man her brother had mentioned to be visiting soon? Frowning, Bunny looked back at the man, only to realize another two suits had popped up in the corner of her vision. She had to make haste. Now.

‘Follow me and find out.’ She breathed, using her momentum to pull her bag free from his hand before running in the direction of a narrow alleyway between the houses. Fresh laundry was hanging from lines that crossed above her head, casting the street in a misty play of shadows, waving over her escaping form.

As half expected, the man continued to pursue her, muddied soles following her in close proximity.

‘Where are we going?’ His voice remained level despite the exertion and Bunny cast him a side glance. He jogged easily behind her, eyes looking up and around the narrow street. She wasn’t sure whether he was nervous about onlookers, or just admiring the change of scenery.

With a sharp turn they entered an even smaller alleyway. But just as she was about to make another right, she saw men rush past. And from the looks of it they were most definitely looking for her. Sharp suits, eager eyes. Within an instant she had pressed her back against the wall, making the stranger half bump into her.

‘In a bit of trouble?’ He smiled. ‘Do tell me it’s not a stolen bag, for…-’

‘Shut it.’ Nervously looking around herself, Bunny decided to keep heading straight, passing through another alleyway where a few women were hanging out carpets to give a pounding. Dust circled up in the air, offering a perfect getaway for their retreating feet.

Some streets later Bunny found herself back at the other side of the square. And if she wasn’t mistaken, her car wouldn’t be far from here. With nimble feet she moved through the crowds that were returning home after their shopping. Arms full of fresh fish, bread and vegetables; it was a challenge to not knock anything out of hands as she zipped past.

Staying hidden in the shade of the narrow passage, she eyed the street where her car was left in the middle of the road. No suits were seen, but that didn’t mean they weren’t there. Over her shoulder, the stranger watched along with her. Was he really not with them? Or was this just play pretend and would he be there to push her into their arms at the opportune time? Feeling her heart thump in her ears, Bunny pressed back into his chest, wishing to back away. And thankfully he did so too, sidestepping so they could remain hidden in the shadows of the buildings surrounding them.

‘Bunny, right?’ He whispered, looking at Bunny’s mildly flushed face. She was a beauty with her brown haired bangs and sparkling green eyes. And a feisty one too. With a scowl she looked back at him.

‘And you are?’

‘A tall dark handsome stranger?’ He tried, smiling. She rolled her eyes quietly and looked back at the square. As half expected one of her father’s henchmen had stepped out from one of the alleyways, shaking his head at someone who didn’t wear a suit. They were everywhere. Why had she even been so stupid to try and get out? Who did she think she was?

‘God have mercy.’ She whispered, shaking her head in defeat. This might just have very well been the last time she’d be allowed to even be outside. Here be Bunny, the mobster misses who became a prisoner in her own home. Woopti-fucking-doo.

‘May I suggest something?’ Jack eyed the little blue car that was left alone as the mobster henchmen ran into another street to continue their search.

‘Shoot.’

‘Charming woman you are.’ He teased.

‘Don’t push it.’ She looked back into his blue eyes, expectantly, waiting for him to dish up his idea.

‘I drive, you lay low and once at home you better have a really good excuse for your father.’

Bunny snarled. There went the last of her plans.

‘Papa!’ Bunny kissed her father’s cheek with perhaps a touch too much enthusiasm. Would he notice she was faking it?

‘Bunny, dear.’ Augusto leaned back a little to brush a loving thumb over his daughter’s face. He seemed quite oblivious to whatever had just transpired.

‘Sleep well?’ She asked, stepping back so her father could move to his desk where a recently lit cigar was waiting. Thick smoke curled up to the high ceiling of the dark, wood panelled office. And from the half-closed shutters and slow movements of Augusto it was clear he was having a particularly rough morning. Or hangover. Or perhaps both.

Waiting in the door opening, Jack shifted on his feet. He was painfully aware of the disheveled state of his shoes and pants. And all that running may have very well ruined his hair too. Keeping his hat in the crook of his arm he looked around the room. So this was it. The lion’s lair. The heart of the operation. Jack was just about to be addressed by the mobster lord who had settled back in his desk chair, when rushed footsteps echoed through the smooth marble hall. The mobster lord frowned and looked up and over Jack’s shoulder, where a heavy breathing bodyguard shot an exasperated look at Bunny.

‘YOU!’ The man wanted to step past Jack, but the Englishman was smooth in “accidentally” obstructing the doorway, eyebrows raising in feigned shock.

‘Apologies!’ Jack bowed slightly, making the bodyguard scowl even more. Apparently more people were having particularly rough mornings. Jack smiled inwardly and watched as Bunny stepped back to side with her father, her eyes betraying just how nervous she was despite her cool facade.  

‘She was out, boss.’ The man pointed a reproachful finger at the brunette. ‘You little devil --’

Augusto inhaled sharply, face souring. ‘Out?’ He looked up and Bunny flinched. Augusto was an impressive looking man. Thin silver streaks framed his rugged looking face and his eyes flamed with passion, madness or both. Standing up with a pained groan he looked down at her, her feet wishing to shuffle back, but bumping into a small garbage bin instead.

That’s what she was to her father in this moment. Garbage. His face melted into complete and utter displeasure. ‘And what, daughter sweet, were you doing..out?! HMM? Wasn’t I clear?!’

‘Papa..I just..I wanted to --’

‘NONE OF THAT.’ Augusto inhaled from the cigar between his fingertips and let the smoke fume out through his nostrils. He looked like a raging bull, eyes wild as he looked back at the bodyguard, then Jack. Jack looked back at Augusto with level eyes, keeping them trained on the mobster lord with an unfazed expression.

‘And you?’

‘Your daughter was kindly enough to pick me up when I had car trouble.’ Jack stepped forward and bowed confidently. ‘Jack Wa--’

‘Are you a fool?!’

Jack raised back up and saw the mobster had turned back to his daughter, making Bunny shrivel smaller and smaller every passing second. She shook her head.

‘How..ugh..how are we ever to find you a husband? This insolence! You are just like your mother. You women you!’ He gripped Bunny’s face between digging fingertips and studied her for a second, snarling: ‘I’ll deal with you later.’ He let go, leaving small red marks on her skin as she rushed past Jack and outside of the room. Jack swallowed. He knew that Luigi’s family were mobsters. He had never cared much for it. All rich people seemed to have their flaws. Their peculiarities. And he was a friend of the family right? But perhaps that had just now been completely and utterly ruined.

‘And you must be Walker.’

Jack quickly returned his attention to Augusto. ‘I am.’ Jack nodded solemnly, keeping a straight face as the bodyguard turned on his heel and looked Jack up and down. His eyes lingered especially long on his sodden trousers, red mud dried like bloody splatters on the brown wool fabric around his calves.

Oh, how he wished he could have changed into a different suit before meeting Augusto. First impressions mattered, you see. 

‘Do not be nervous.’ Lucia smiled, squeezing her fingers around his bicep. ‘It’s just men. Stupid, silly, rambunctious men. They wouldn’t know a good thing even if it hit them straight in the face.’ Her silvery eyes glanced over at the bellboy who kept a straight face, staring in the direction of the elevator doors as they zipped up to the 11th floor of the Parisian Grand.

‘I’m not nervous.’ Jack looked down at her. All silvery haired class wrapped in a black satin gown. She was breathtaking. ‘Not for them at least. I’m nervous for..you.’

‘Me?’ She chuckled softly. ‘Oh sweet darling. You do not realize what a gem you are. The men in my life never cared for their women the way you do.’ She sighed and looked down at the ring on her finger. Wrapped around the smooth black tuxedo jacket, it sparkled like a star in nightly skies. She missed the one who gave that ring to her. But he was gone. And were it not for Jack, she’d feel rather alone - and terribly bored.

‘And your husband?’

‘Well. What can I say. He was a man. I loved him. I fought him. I hated him. And then he died.’

Jack swallowed as the elevator’s bell dinged, signalling they had arrived at Lucia’s suite. The place where he’d meet her family - and perhaps in a way become part of her family too.

‘Remember to be better than them my boy.’

‘It’s Jack, madame.’

‘I know, I know.’ She laughed and the doors slid open. Her fingers tapped comfortingly on his arm before they strode out into her palace of gold and glitter. ‘But you’re still my boy...Jack.’

--

Chap 2 >

--

General tagsquad: @harrysthiccthighss​ @tumblnewby @magdelen69​ @thereisa8ella​ @darkbooksarwin​ @summersong69​ @madbaddic7ed​ @luclittlepond​ @maroonmolly @just-a-normal-fangirl18​ @hell1129-blog​ @agniavateira​ @tillthelandslide​ @elinesama​ @maddyreads14

[clawsandblood]

4 - “Do you trust me?”

link to ao3

first part on tumblr   previous part on tumblr

Once both men were awake enough, Borna told Steven of his strange encounter last night. Steven’s face grew more and more alarmed as the story progressed.

“You won’t believe this,” he slowly said, “but I also had a weird encounter last night and-” He stopped. “There was this woman, looking kinda how you said yours was looking, and in the end she gave me a huge tip, saying that both me and my friend could use some money.” 

“How huge?” Borna asked, brows furrowing.

Steven stood up, walked over to his jacket and dug out his wallet. “This big,” he said, showing Borna the hundred dollar bill.

“Fuck,” Borna swore under his breath. He took his phone, frantically going through his browsing history until he found a picture of Madam Reid. “Is that her?” he asked Steven, showing him the screen.

“Yeah,” he said hoarsely.

They exchanged looks. “How the fuck did she know we know each other?” Borna asked.

“Oh, shit.” Steven was staring at Borna. “You’ve already got a job interview with her company, right?”

Borna nodded. “Tomorrow. They were in an awful hurry.”

Steven collapsed on the couch. “What if they’re some sort of human trafficking ring?” he asked. “What if they’re with the mafia?”

“I think they won’t do anything after one interview,” Borna said. “Or I could just cancel.”

Steven nodded. “That would probably be the safest, yeah.”

Borna opened his phone, thumb hovering over the number that called him earlier in the morning. He sighed, putting the phone down. “But I’m curious,” he said. “Maybe one interview won’t be that bad.”

“Borna,” Steven pleaded.

“I can just decline afterwards.”

Their eyes were locked in a staring contest.

“If your kidney gets sold on the black market next week I won’t help you, I’ll just say that I told you so.”

Borna’s lips twitched into a smile. “Note taken.”

---

It took some digging through their shared wardrobes to find a presentable pair of trousers and a shirt for Borna to wear to the interview. Steven did have some semi-formal clothes, but Borna somehow felt like most of Steven’s patterned shirts were a touch too vulgar for the occasion.

“How do I look?” he asked, giving a little twirl.

Steven chewed on his lip. “Presentable,” he finally said.

Borna nodded. “I feel like a tuna fish in a can.”

“Meaning?”

“Stuffed, uncomfortable, about to be half-eaten, half-thrown away.”

“Having last minute jitters?” Steven smiled at Borna and clapped him on the back. “You’re gonna go there, snoop a bit during the interview, go home and tell them you’re actually going to Russia.”

Borna snorted. “Sounds good.”

They went to the building where the interview was going to take place together. It was a modern office building, fairly boring and unremarkable. The entrance had plaques of several different companies on the wall, Northwest Holistic Natural Remedies being among them.

“Well,” Steven said. “This is kinda anticlimactic.”

“What did you expect?” Borna asked him.

Steven shrugged. “Something more glamorous. Or completely rundown. I don’t know how human organ traffickers work.”

Borna elbowed him. “They’re not gonna sell my organs,” he grumbled.

“Yeah, yeah,” Steven mumbled. He gave Borna one last look-over, fixing his hair a bit. “You’ve got this,” he said and patted his shoulder. “Good luck.”

“Thanks.” Borna walked in, going to the reception desk.

Steven stood for a few moments, looking after his friend, and left. There was no need for him to keep loitering and there were groceries to be bought.

---

Borna found the office that the receptionist directed him to. The doors were slightly open and the plaque on them said “Northwest Holistic Natural Remedies - Madam Reid.” He tentatively knocked.

“Come in,” said a voice.

He entered, closing the doors behind himself. A different lady was sitting behind the desk, looking at him expectantly. There was a sign on her desk that read “Natalie Adams, secretary.” The walls were decorated with various pictures of nature, keeping a cohesive theme. It was terribly bland, yet tasteful.

“Madam is already waiting for you,” she said, gesturing to the doors to the side.

“Thank you,” he said and walked in.

Now that office was a lot different. The furniture was darker, sturdier. Decor was still revolving around nature, but this was darker, feeling more like antiques rather than mass-produced photos printed on canvases. Behind the desk sat Madam Reid, as sharp and poised as the night he met her.

“Hello, Borna,” she said. “Please sit down.”

Borna obeyed, drawing the heavy leather-padded chair. “Good morning,” he said.

Her pronunciation of his name was miles better than what he was used to, though her decision to use his first name rattled him. Maybe she just didn’t want to deal with pronouncing my surname, he thought, suppressing an amused huff.

“It’s two in the afternoon,” she pointed out.

He chuckled awkwardly. “Had another night shift,” he explained. “Those tend to mess with perception of time.”

She nodded. “Understandable.”

“I brought my resume with me in case-” he started, but got silenced by a hand gesture.

“I think both of us know that that’s not why you’re here now,” she said, fixing him with her stare.

“Then what is it?” he asked. He grew hotter in his shirt and dress pants.

She took his hand, unbuttoning the cuff and rolled up the sleeve until the bite mark was fully exposed. “When was it?” she asked, examining the scar. “Three days ago? Four?”

“Four,” he answered. “Are you also a…” He trailed off.

“A lycanthrope, yes.”

“Okay,” he said, still staring at where she was holding his arm.

She rolled the sleeve back up, buttoning it. “We need to keep together,” she said. “Lone wolves don’t survive for too long.”

“Meaning?”

“There’s an organisation that I’m a part of,” she explained. “It connects people like us all over the continent. We could help you out with things.”

His brows furrowed. “What things?”

Madam Reid gave him a look that he’d describe as sarcastic if she was literally anyone else. “Money.”

“I can get by,” he protested. “I’ve got a job, I can pay rent-”

“You work the graveyard shift at the carwash and have to live with a roommate,” Madam interrupted.

Borna swallowed. “How do you know about my roommate?” he asked quietly.

“I met him the same night as you.” She smiled, but it just looked like a beast baring its teeth. “He is a very friendly man. You two spend too much time together, you smell like each other.”

“We smell-?”

She nodded. “It should come to you soon,” she said soothingly. “You’ll get used to it.”

Borna nodded, staring at his own hands, trying to process all the given information.

“Borna?”

He looked up.

Madam Reid was looking at him, features soft and relaxed. For the first time she didn’t look like she was about to swallow him whole, though her eyes stayed the same. “Do you trust me?” she asked gently.

“I don’t know,” he replied softly. “I think you’ve been truthful, but I don’t think I should trust you just yet.”

She leaned back in her chair. “Smart,” she commented. “Not the smartest, but admirable approach.” She drummed her fingers on the table. “I’ve got a proposition,” she said, leaning forward again. “On Friday we’ve got a meeting. I’ll have Natalie email you details and you can come see how things work for yourself. How does that sound?”

He took a moment to consider her offer. “Okay,” he conceded. “Maybe I’ll come.”

“That’s all I ask for.”

He slowly started getting up.

“And Borna?”

He looked at her.

“I don’t think I need to tell you to come by yourself, right?”

He shook his head. “You don’t.”

“Good.” She also got up, offering him a hand. “Hopefully we’ll see each other soon,” she said.

He just nodded wordlessly.

“Goodbye,” she said and then he was already through the door. The secretary gave him a friendly smile and a goodbye of her own as he exited the office.

---

“How was it?” Steven asked him when he got outside.

Borna took a deep breath. “She’s also, uh-” he gestured at the bite mark on his arm. “She offered help. She knew we live together because we smell like each other.”

“Wait, what?” Steven was staring at him, nose wrinkled, and mouth falling open. “We smell like each other?”

“Yeah, I know.” Borna sighed. “She said I should be able to… detect these things soon too.”

“Ew.”

“Yeah.”

They stood in contemplative silence for a few moments.

“We should go home,” Borna said and Steven nodded. He had his arms occupied with bags from the grocery store and he handed over one to Borna, who automatically took it.

---

He was working the night shift again. Again, he couldn’t understand why would a carwash service need to be open at such unholy hours. Again, he was reminded that the wealthy, the weird and the criminals were also paying customers.

So far he had to deal with only a few people that seemed a bit too inebriated to be anywhere near car keys. He did have to watch himself physically way more than usual, but the drunk were usually quite generous tippers and that night didn’t prove any different.

He had a long period of nothing, where he almost nodded off several, but the noise from the neighbouring gas station managed to keep him up. Then, just a one hour before the end, a car drove in.

---

Dorian’s phone rang. He groaned, looking at the caller’s ID. Three poop emojis were displayed on the screen. He groaned again, louder, then finally accepted the call.

“Hi, Gary,” he said. For a few moments he was quiet, listening intently. “Fuck,” he finally said. “A feral one?”

He got up from the couch and turned off the TV, which was showing some shitty horror flick. He sandwiched the phone between his ear and his shoulder as he started pulling on his pants.

“Yeah, give me ten min, I’ll be there. Bye.”

He disconnected the call, putting the phone down. He dressed up, sturdy, warm, practical clothes, and left the flat, remembering at the last moment to take his phone and wallet.

He rushed downstairs and walked briskly to the main street. A car was already waiting for him. 

“Move it,” Gary said, poking his head through the window.

“Yeah, yeah,” Dorian grumbled breathlessly. He sat down on the passenger’s side, fastening the seatbelt. The moment he was done the car peeled off the curb, making Dorian swear quietly, which in turn made Gary cackle.

The car sped through the streets, out of town to the forest road.

“Do you know where it’s supposed to be?” Dorian asked.

“Somewhere in the west,” Gary answered. “Near one farm, the owners complained about the cattle being killed.”

“Not regular wolves?” 

Gary shook his head. “The tracks didn’t fit, plus there’s been rumors of Bigfoot in the woods.”

Dorian snorted. “Of course that’s what they say.”

Gary shrugged. “Not that far fetched in comparison to the truth,” he said.

Dorian sighed. “Fair point.” He started rifling through his pockets for the cigarettes. “Sometimes I still can’t believe this is my life.”

“Yeah,” Gary said absent-mindedly. Then he noticed the cigarette pack in Dorian’s hand. “Hey, fuck off with that,” he grumbled. “No smoking in my car.”

Dorian rolled his eyes. “So sensitive.”

Gary glanced at him with a poisonous look. “Don’t you dare,” he growled.

“I can open the window.”

Gary puffed out an angry breath. “You won’t you-” He pawed at Dorian, trying to take away his cigarettes, when something collided with the car loudly, making Gary swerve and brake.

“Fuck!”

They stopped abruptly and jumped out of the car. There was a dark figure lying on the side of the road, whining loudly.

Gary glared at Dorian, who awkwardly stuffed his hands into his pockets. They tentatively approached the lump. Coming closer, it was visible that it was a sort of a wolf, only larger and as much as the moonlight permitted to see, with a different coat colouring.

It started snarling as they approached.

“I think we found our feral wolf,” Dorian said quietly and squatted down, facing the creature. Gary stayed a bit behind him, standing.

“We got you pretty hard, didn’t we?” Dorian asked quietly.

The wolf growled in response.

“I know, I know,” Dorian said soothingly. He got up and started taking off his jacket.

Gary groaned. “I’ll get the stuff from the car,” he said and left.

Once Dorian stripped off all his clothes he squatted down, tilting his face towards moonlight and began to change. His body grew, transforming into a lupine form, growing thick fur all over.

He slowly walked over to the hurt wolf, sniffing softly. The wolf whiled quietly, but let him close. Dorian carefully nuzzled the other one and gave the bloodied fur a few careful licks. Finally, he settled, laying down next to the hurt wolf.

Gary sighed. He had thick gloves on and a gun in his hands. “Dorian,” he said disapprovingly.

Dorian looked at him and just gave the wolf another gentle lick.

Cocking the gun, Gary took aim and fired.

With one last whine, the wounded wolf died.

Dorian slowly got up, nudging the wolf with his head, giving it a few small, affectionate licks, before leaving it, walking over to Gary.

“You know I don’t like shooting when you’re right there,” Gary said.

Dorian in between transformed back to human, panting slightly from the effort.

“He was so scared,” Dorian said. “And hurting.”

“We did hit him with a car,” Gary pointed out.

Dorian shook his head. “It was something from before,” he said. “We should take a look at the body before we get rid of it.”

“I’m not hauling a huge wolf back to the city for you to play a doctor,” Gary said. He went back to the car, putting the gun away. “Come help me get the covering, I don’t want blood all over my car.”

Dorian sighed and finished dressing up. Gary had a waterproof tarp in his trunk and they used it to protect the interior of the car before they dragged the cadaver into it. They had to put it on the backseats, the trunk of the car being too small to fit a grown werewolf.

After some more driving they found a muddy road through the forest. Gary parked in the undergrowth and they spent the better part of the night digging a large and deep enough hole.

Dorian wiped sweat off his forehead. “We deserve a bonus for all this,” he groaned.

Gary glared at him. “Like you’re doing that much,” he grumbled.

They were hauling the body out of the car now, Dorian desperately trying to carry an equal share, but he was mostly getting covered in blood seeping from the plastic while Gary was supporting most of its weight.

“Not all of us spend all the time in the gym,” Dorian bit back.

They finally hauled it to the grave and rolled out of the tarp, pushing it in.

“You put the tarp in, I’ll take care of this,” Gary said and started pushing the dirt onto the dead werewolf. Dorian nodded and started folding the plastic, trying not to get blood everywhere.

They were finished soon, getting back in the car. Dorian had the bloody tarp resting in his lap, clothes almost equally as dirty.

“You look like you showered in blood,” Gary said after a while. They were still driving through the forest.

“I kinda did,” Dorian replied.

“My car must look like shit.”

Dorian shrugged. “It’s just some mud.”

Gary huffed. “And blood too.”

“It’s just some bloody mud.”

---

The car was covered in more or less fresh mud, with a bump in the front that looked suspiciously bloody. Borna approached the driver’s window, squinting at the bright headlights.

“Good evening,” he said automatically.

“Do you guys have anything extra for mud?” the driver said.

Borna barely heard him, because in the passenger’s seat was an unmistakable figure.

Fucking hell, why Dorian covered in blood?!

Alarm must had been written on his face, because the driver laughed awkwardly. “We hit a wolf,” he explained. “Hauling one of those beasts off the road is a nasty business.”

Dorian met Borna’s eyes and quickly looked away.

“I see,” Borna said. “I could clean the dirt manually but it would take longer and cost more.” He tried not to stare at Dorian, who was very stubbornly pretending not to see him.

“Eh, I’ll just take the basic automated wash,” the driver said.

Borna nodded. “Okay.” He directed the car where to go, turning on the wash cycle. The overwhelming smell of the detergent finally overlaid the stench of blood, but Dorian’s blood-soaked image still danced in front of his eyes. Once the car was clean the driver paid, leaving a small tip and left. The entire time Dorian pointedly avoided Borna’s eyes.

Once they were gone from the station, Borna took his phone out, opening the text messages.

“what the fuck was all that??” he typed out, sending the message to Dorian. He leaned back on the wall, waiting for the response and staring at the clock.

[paraclete0407]

Stuff I might never get to do (from books I read after I thought I had mastered the Bible / Scripture)

1.

Theories of ‘political vision’ - ex. Obama’s ‘A Promised Land,’ or from someone I miss, UKPM David Cameron’s ‘For the Record.’  Also records of military careers and the consequences and lessons therefrom, particularly Gen., Prof. Stanley A. McChrystal’s ‘My Share of the Task’ - decades of one meal a day, utterly excellent love-letters and wisdom-writings to his wife, sweeping reports, culminating in the operation that ‘extrajudicially or para-judicially executed’ bin Laden.  I also never forgot the NYTimes photo of the SEAL operator’s back-muscles.  My giant Obama critique, however, was one of those ‘grandfather Hall of Presidents’ books that I want to postpone.

2.

My mistakes and wishes.  Ex. the woman I wanted to marry in early 2011; I had cut off my parents for 6 months and called one night my mom; she got really drunk that night, flirted with foreigners from [ultra-mercenary cram-school that hires anyone], got terrorized by [b/Black man of the type who clearly believes ‘As I am b/Black I know everything worth knowing and can terrorize, antagonize, demonize anyone and anything for the greater glory of my own ego / Chairman Mao].  Culminating in me in the ladies’ room telling her to get up and I told her so, going back to the pub-room and threatening the mercenaries, and finally being ‘mogged,’ masculinity-compromised or eclipsed / overpowered, by the man who was either her surrogate father-figure, rapist, seducee-turned-wrist-breaking-controller, no one really knew, and my ex-father-figure who however either a) failed to bait the trap properly and/or b) failed to communicate the true meaning and message and purpose of his love for me, to me.  But, it was instrumental in blowing what was probably the best job I ever had, and the only job that ever asked me back. 

After that I started honestly trying to live for either a) the younger generation b) ‘just me.’  I also made a number of hard or soft promises to students involving me writing stuff.  Don’t say ‘will’ or ‘might’ to Koreans b/c it kind of spiritually translates in to ‘shall’ or ‘must’ or ‘has to.’  They’re the poor in spirit from what I can tell.  

I also drove around California for a while, missed a job-offer from a Catholic university in [central Korean city], and thought a lot about F. Scott Fitzgerald.  Studied Emmanuel ‘ethics-as-first-philosophy love-of-wisdom-converting-into-wisdom-of-love’ Levinas a bit, read ‘Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother’ and couldn’t sleep

3.

Sundry ‘Teacher Dream(s).’  I’d been hoping in a way that ‘Free Food for Millionaires’ author Min Jin Lee, JD Yale etc, would put this all in her ‘American Hagwon’ but she’s been baking fancy cakes and writing offside / deflective lit. about Japanese gays for like 10 years while NK marched on in real life killing people and Koreans were also dying from numerous causes, running away from home, economically induced suicide, amazing shame- and rape-culture: cashing in.  I remember my last night at the hagwon, a time of bonhomie, when I perhaps might’ve even said, ’Y’know, can I un-resign-in-protest?’  Boss, What’ll you miss most about Korea, Korean women?’  Me (playing the fool), ‘There are Korean women in America.’  Boss, (sforzando), ‘Gyopo women.’

My ‘best guess’ anyway at ‘edubusiness’ was sth I labored at off and on for now like 6 years called ‘Three Kings’ which is partly about a white ex-literary agent family named ‘Foch’ after the French Generalissime who actually won WW1, famous for his ‘moral factor’ theory of war as well as his remark, ‘This is not a peace but an armistice for 20 years.  He makes 400,000 dollars in his 1st year of college by advising his roommate to publish his ‘freshman’ novel with an extreme ‘point,’ not worrying about winning every possible reader, just let me edit all the sign-post-phrases and tell you what I firmly believe you were trying to write, sell this novel for 2million dollars, marry the Korean girl across the hall, forget RU, cultivate life and love with your stylus, and I’ll continue to march on simultaneously trying to promote love while reading everyone and everything semi-against or [angle / thrust-vector to] their grain (for their own good).  Later he starts a school with his two friends, an MD/PhD program dropout from LA and an MBA ex-Samsung Managing Director or something.  But in the end his MD/PhD friend can’t stop thinking about [student’s] amazing breasts and [MBA] friend can’t stop hating and short-selling himself w/r/t marriage and self-regard b/c he’s stuck in the other-always-has-more-money-always-more-money-to-make mentality.  In the end the protagonist resigns in protest from the company he himself designed, developed, planned, etc. but didn’t have the money to call his own after reaching the position of ‘Joint Department Head’ which is kind of like ‘Chief of Staff’ to a president at a much smaller scale.  He’s a devout literal Christian or at least Christianist who wishes the world were Christian and he reflects in the end on the Longfellow poem about the Three Kings who ‘know King Herod’s hate’ and had to travel back to their homelands a different way.  There is also a possibly-to-be-deleted ‘Interludio Meridiana’ where he happens across the molested constantly male-gazed student in Nonhyeon (a neighborhood South of the Han River but not at all like the PSY song), starts to hear Palestrina’s ‘Sicut Cervus’ (listen to it on YouTube - Palestrina’s polyphony philosophy is one of the crowns of human art) in his head, wanders down to the bus depot and finds that his thoughts / creativity etc. have become cathected, chained to, or at least led by memory, and he has joined a ‘chain of being’ that connects the past to the future.  

4.

‘Bethlehem Dream’ - kind of my homage to the forementioned Kim Minju of IZ*ONE, my last favorite pop-star before assuring Christian friend I’d stop following K-pop (I’m against BlackPink and their entire organization).  Connects to all my dreams and theories of education - including my extreme disillusionment with education, and sympathy for anyone made the ‘beneficiary’ of the latest theory or tool - as well my homage to the school that most closely approximates my dream school, Prof,. Pastor, Dr. Chancellor John Piper’s Bethlehem College and Seminary in Minneapolis.  And also, women’s desire to have children / babies, even without husbands, men’s desire to bear spiritual fruit with or without traditional fellowship.

5.

Masculinity in novels.  Not Norman Mailer Philip Roth stuff but novels that can lens reality from the top down and not get addicted to some or other cupidity or method of endearing / charming the audience, which often makes them stupider or causes them to regard hidden truth as an outright lie and/or triviality.  MJL’s ‘Free Food for Millionaires’ was pretty masculine; better is billionaire Michael Kim’s ‘Offerings,’ a novel I wish I could teach someone only I can’t find a good student / reader and maybe I myself missed the point and only thought I got it.

Thinking quitting while ahead - I really don’t know whether adding to people’s minds and knowledge at this point in Time is good or whether writing amounts to feasting the already glutted, furnishing them further excuses for disbelief and inaction and alienating / dividing them from the hungry and poor.  I like a song called ‘Love Song for No. 1.’  Remember talking about a walk in the woods I took, understanding something about the Other’s first language the authenticity of this language and its nativity to their understanding and ‘originary’ or ‘birth-mother’ identity or ‘self-system.’  Not something to tell your Anglo-but-ish-they-were-Teutonic biological parents because they will make like they want to backhand your head off then spend years denying they’re either racist, non-believers, or what I have come to call anti-believers; people who amid ‘Delta Covid Summer’ are trying to destroy the beliefs of others.  Also Dr. R.C Sproul Ligonier Ministries, ‘Forgetfulness is apostasy.’

6.

‘Flowers on Water.’  Kind of my homage to Krystal Jung Soojung of ‘hieroglyphic’ girl-group f(x) and later IMO excellent actress, her best moment perhaps the final episode of ‘My Lovely Girl,’ a shocking and awesome scene that appears to talk about Resurrection and Eternity.  The protagonist is another cynical edubusinessman who is thinking about mass-death, getting mad at mainstream American Christianity for singing songs while people were drowning, and finally on Google Books comes across a teacher-poem from 1881 titled ‘Flowers,’ for a group of rather hapless seemingly American Indian students in California as well as critiques of educational praxis which, in 1881, were identical to what they are today.  ‘God is sovereign in all things’ - such a difficult category.  I abandoned this novel for a number of reasons such as the belief that I might be able to reverse-engineer Brad Thor or something for a quick buck.  Went to Half Price Books (now closed) where they had a picture of the Jackson Five over the toilet in the men’s room.  I read a bit of a one-dollar Brad Thor book about Russia but on the way on home I once started once again dreaming mytically about Korean girls / women as it began to snow and thinking about ‘Lo How a Rose E’er Blooming’ (’Es Ist Ein Rosentsprungen) the German Nativity song which Michael Praetorius composed at least in part in response to the appalling Reformation Wars and out of a hope or wish that remembrance of Christ’s birth could somehow reunite the Church.  This also made me think about a high school I admire / respect and my old friend and his now-divorced wife with whom I many times fantasized about singing and talking with again; and whom I kind of wish I could tell the author of ‘All Quiet on the Western Front’ remarried his first wife eventually but IDK what good it is to give already-dreaming people more dreams either.  

It’s 9:35 AM and my ‘insomnia’ type notebook-postings haven’t made me any new friends in a while.  My last thing is just, if you care about Education or young girls / American women / culture / schools, achievement, heroines, stories, or for that matter Bible-translation or the latter-day odysseys of the nominal Episcopalian Church, with trembling heart, try to reflect on Headmaster Josiah Bunting III’s ‘All Loves Excelling.’  

One of my favorite Christian songs is ‘The Death of King David’

And God said that day shall dawn

to bring that flow’r newly born

from thy stem in fullness growing

in fragrance sweet night and morn

all My people shall adorn

with Breath of life bestowing

Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah

[wexhappyxfew]

HAPPY TRIVIA TUESDAY SHANNON!! Why did you start writing and how did you get from your starting point to here? (Like- basically can you talk about your development as a writer?)

AHHHHH JAMIE HAPPY TRIVIA TUESDAY!!!! and omg thank you so much for the ask you wonderful human, you’re such a supportive bean thank you!!! <3 

and these questions *chef’s kiss*

One of the main reasons I started writing is actually something people may not suspect. Growing up, I actually HATED writing because of experiences in a 3rd grade or 2nd grade class - I can’t remember exactly. But we were supposed to write a short story and when I presented mine, I was told that it didn’t have good enough ‘context’ or a real drive or plot, even though for me I thought it did. Supposedly it just ‘wasn’t what the hopes of writing a short story would be’. I was later told it was because I needed a simpler topic. Smh. So that set me off really and all through elementary I strayed from writing, writing classes, anything and I mostly just read because I was like just not confident at all with writing. And I struggled big time with essays, reports, story writing. In 6th grade, my ELA teacher tore apart my story as well - so yeah I wasn’t exactly happy about that either :( I was already off on a bad foot. 

But when I reached 7th grade - this was after my best friend introduced me to Wattpad and such - I started seeing the impacts of fanfiction actually and that you can base it off something and then make it completely your own! WHICH I LOVED! Because I like a bit of structure BUT THEN I LIKE GOING WILD!!! I like having that model a bit, but then being able to go and do what you want with writing. 

And honestly, I’ll be honest, I have written over 20 different works, but Band of Brothers is my only published work :) It’s short stories, other fics based on stuff like Stars Wars, The Maze Runner, etc...a bunch of stuff like that! 

And then I really discovered the impact of writing on me. I found that it became a hobby for me and I knew that when homework was done - I had the ability to go and write and escape to a completely different world. And for me, since I have trouble focusing in school and then it makes stuff more difficult to complete homework and such, I liked being able to escape to a different world through writing. And writing saved me more than anything in quarantine.

At the beginning of quarantine, I just was not in a good headspace especially with everything happening, but being able to go and write The Soldier of Stars with Hazel Parker, and being able to develop a deeply flawed character and write interactions with others, and then go and write a strong female bonded friendship as well as strong female characters who were also deeply flawed, really helped me through because it was rough. I don’t know what I would’ve done without it. 

But writing truly, I saw a change in myself even in school. Because of writing fanfiction really, I saw improvements in my essays at school surprisingly by 8th grade! They were used for examples, I was getting good grades on them - even if it were just a science report - and the teachers were complimenting my way of writing and my style. I remember in 8th grade I was partnered with a girl, where we were given 10 vocab words and had to create a story with it and we would share our stories with each other and I remember looking at me after I read it and saying, “ YOU wrote that? ITS AMAZING!” and she was just super shocked. And I think that’s where I really started writing after that tbh. 

Through high school I had major improvements and by my AP Lang Exam I took, I was nervous bc it was 45 mins for it, which isn’t exactly normal bc of COVID, but I was just like “Focus, you write FOR FUN for HOURS ON END, you can write for 45 minutes.” And that really focused me. And I got a 5 on the exam, which I was very happy about. But I swear it’s simply because of how much I write, and how OCD I am about making sure it is all perfect and up to my standards. I swear on it. Because with my writing, I like a flow and I feel if you don’t have a flow it just doesn’t work - and having a flow helped me AP exam bc without it, I would’ve done worse. But flow helps and being able to write with a flow helped more than anything! SO YES fanfiction helped earn me a good grade on my AP exam LOL

And for me writing has just been a place to express who I am. Sure, I like clothes, but most of the time for school, I’m too tired to try super hard and end up throwing on a sweatshirt and leggings and I’m not super talkative either, I’m quite shy. So writing, is where I really feel I can express myself and just BE myself. I can purely just write for fun and if people read it COOL! THANK YOU! But I’ve always written for myself, for personal enjoyment, and to see my characters, so when others love them, it’s always so nice!!! But writing has always been such a personal thing for me, and I love it more than anything in the world, where I feel I can truly express myself! <3

AND...my development as a writer is something I can definitely talk about!! <3

For me, each new story I write, I can see myself developing. Because when you start out, you’re not perfect - I SOOOO was not perfect - I wrote in 1st person (NO HATE AT ALL I JUST SUCK AT FIRST PERSON), I barely included any emotional value or ideas focused simply on timeline, I just wrote without second thought or really a care. But with Band of Brothers, I really developed. I write in 3rd person heavily, so I can explore different heads and emotions and character arcs, and ideas and interior monologue, which for a quiet person like me I LIVE FOR!

For Sunshine Soldier, I wrote with Charlotte Tarvers and developing her character, as she is someone who is very similar to myself, is something I have loved more than anything in this world. She’s my OG OC, my original little BoB Beeb. And her story I really focused on relationships and friendships of characters, simply because of what I was trying to portray with her of the fact she was a character who was called ‘Sunshine’ and loved everyone and was loved by everyone and was really that light in Easy. But in that story, I didn’t develop emotions (as I go back and reread) and descriptions as much as I wish I had. I feel there’s parts EVERYWHERE, where I could go in and add a little bit more of everything there

For The Soldier of Stars (+Ad Astra Per Aspera) I feel you see A BIG CHANGE in writing because this is where, with a quiet character like Hazel Parker who is heavily and deeply flaws, where we see the emotion and description that Sunshine Soldier misses at some points, comes out. Writing Hazel’s character (+that of Catherine and Lizzie and their bond) we focus more on an internal monologue, heavy and deep set emotions, and a constant questioning of reality from someone who is deeply hurt, and quiet and humble and soft-spoken like Hazel. And for me, there’s just so many lines in The Solider of Stars that I love with all my heart, because there are so filled with emotion and deep meaning and such and ACK I LOVE IT! One of my favorites is from Ad Astra Per Aspera - Chapter 4: The Little Bird, where all it is, is Hazel’s interior monologue after her wound. Her struggle and mental battle to simply stand and use the bathroom normally - from bed to bathroom and back. And there’s no present dialogue - very in character for Hazel, and simply just flashbacks and her mental mind having it’s own battle with having to constantly push herself to get over this fear and keep pushing herself to get better, to keep fighting. It’s a hard chapter, but so deeply beautiful of a raw struggle of simply being human.

And I feel with The Soldier of Stars (+Ad Astra) I felt myself simply just write with so much pure and raw emotion, which I held from Sunshine Solider a bit, even though Sunshine Soldier has A LOT I feel still LOL. But I definitely saw growth between these two stories, a whole lot, and I feel as I keep going I’ll just keep growing and growing with it all.

I feel with The Soldier of Stars (+Ad Astra ) I finally took the time and care to focus on my characters, and each of them individually, and really focus on emotions and feelings, which is something present in war for many and especially having a quiet character makes it easier I feel because they don’t say much but they FEEL so much. 

I would talk about Landslide - but I don’t want to get out of hand and spoil anything, so I’ll leave it at that for the moment <3 

I’ve just truly seen myself really develop and grow as any writer would and it has been so fun to see where my writing has taken me!! Thank you so much for the question Jamie, this was truly SUCH a good one to ask, because I can tell just a bit of my own story and personal struggle with it all. Thank you!!! <3

[smoljamswrites]

BTS as your best friends:

I’m kind of proud of this and it’s my first one so yeah. If you like it please like or reblog, it’d mean the world to me. Thank you! x

KIM SEOKJIN

okay hands down Jin would be such a good best friend

He’s very protective of you

10/10 would get triggered if someone hurt/upset you

comforts you by putting on a funny movie and chills with you on the sofa or tells you an endless supply of his dad jokes

If you go shopping with him, it’d be like a father and child moment

he keeps telling you to stop messing with stuff on the shelves

continuously jokes around and tells you to put things back

and will definitely ask you what you think he should eat next on EatJin

actually, when he does EatJin you’re usually behind the camera just lying around on his bed or whatever, keeping quiet and playing games on your phone

because I get the impression that Jin loves it when he’s got company and he’s in someone else’s presence

asjskjskjsjs does that even make sense

like he just wants you to be there

even if you ain’t doing anything together

you’re just doing your own thing while he does his

he loves that

also because he’s a Mario fan, and he can be extra af, I think if you guys couldn’t decide who got to choose, between the two of you, something like which takeaway you should order

then you are playing Mario Kart and the winner gets to choose

and boi boy does he get competitive at Mario Kart

if you do win though, expect to witness a spluttery loud-ass Jin

not that he genuinely cares that you get to choose the food

I mean, he loves food so whatever you choose he will eat anyway

but he gets chaotic because he knows you find it funny

he’ll do anything to make you laugh

believe me when I say Jin lives to see you happy

being your best friend, he’s seen you upset and at your worse

which upset him in return

so he makes it his mission to make you smile and laugh when you’re with him

MIN YOONGI

Lets you chill in his studio whenever you want

you even have the password

you just walk in most evenings, pass him some food and drinks, and try your best to help him with whatever he’s working on this time

he appreciates this so much

you still annoy him a lot but lets be honest he wouldn’t want it any other way

the other guys often say that you and Yoongi are like a couple

surprisingly Yoongi doesn’t really care that they call you guys a couple

matter of fact, it probably doesn’t help the situation that you and Yoongi are  a l w a y s  cuddling

Like if you are on the sofa watching a film with the guys, you best expect his head to be on your shoulder, face nuzzled into your neck, arms draped over your stomach, by the end of the night

he just finds you comfy

similarly, if you are with him in his studio and its really late

and you refuse to leave without him because you know he’s tired too

he’ll be all huffy for a bit, but neither of you end up leaving because you’re both so stubborn

instead you’ll end up on his lap, your face on his chest, while he continues to work

and when he’s finally done, if you look too exhausted he’ll just take you back to his place and let you stop there for the night

you always beg him to teach you the piano

“but Yoongi you’re the piano god”  “go away y/n”

he insults you everyday but only because he loves you and he knows you can handle it because you insult him right back

you balance each other out perfectly

he’s calm and collected

you’re more bubbly and giggly enthusiastic

both of you are equally savage though

normally all you do is either hang out at his place or his studio

if you do go out then it’ll be at night, where it is typically quieter

you’ll go get a coffee or some food and just drive around, talking for ages and listening to music, time running away with you

so much sass omg

JUNG HOSEOK

Takes you shopping and judges your fashion choices

when he comes back from tour, he’ll have lots of gifts for you even though you always tell him not to bring you anything back

also if you used to be scared of loud noises well,, lets just say you’re not anymore

you’re used to his happy outbursts and sound effects

but you also know the other side to him that the public doesn’t see

ofc he’s not always going to be the happy, bubbly jhope you see through the cameras

he can truly be himself when he’s around you and he can relax

but when he is acting loud and chirpy he sort of rubs off on you

like your enthusiasm is fed by his enthusiasm

so good luck to those around you because they basically have to handle jhope x2

you get on so well with his family, especially his sister

with his sister being into clothes and fashion too, when you visit her with hoseok, she always compliments your outfits

and hobi will be smirking in the corner because (like i said above) he takes you shopping

and trust me, he would not let you leave that shop with ugly clothes

have you seen that man

he’s the fashion icon

so he takes full credit for every one of your outfits

always gets you to dance with him

he enjoys teaching you new BTS choreography

you’re both easily scared so if there’s a bug for example, the situation would go down like this

“Hobi you get rid of it!”

“No why should it be me? I think you should do it”

“No, i’m scared! You do it!”

“Y/N you’re closer to it, just do it!”

This arguing back and forth lasts for a few minutes until the bug flies/crawls away and you both run off screaming that its gonna attack you

so yeah, literally never a dull moment when Hoseok is your best friend!

KIM NAMJOON

Lowkey wants you both to match outfits but he would never ask you

could either be goofy with you or he’ll go completely psychological on your ass

there’s no in-between with Joon

You sometimes have to remind him that hes only human and reassure him he’s a great leader because I feel like he’d sometimes get in his own head and let the haters get to him, yknow?

You just gotta keep telling him he’s doing a great job and help him not let the stress get the better of him

You’re always there for him, supporting him

and he’s always there for you too

listens to all your problems

he gives the best advice

he’s also very protective of you

yknow when he clenches his jaw? or he raises one of his eyebrows? omg please tell me you know what i’m talking about well he’d do that if some one hurt you and he’d get hella mad

your family love him

they say he’s a very positive influence on you

he gets you to help him write lyrics because you’re his “muse”

he always convinces bighit to let you come on tour

even if he has to pay for you himself, you are coming

always leaves his broken stuff in your room

recommends you books to read (regardless of whether you actually like to read or not)

he is also the reason why you’re dirty minded

like forget expensive girl, have you ever heard ‘trouble’??

you’ll be with the other guys and you two just accidentally end up speaking English and the other guys are like..um hELLO?

PARK JIMIN

okay so I can imagine Jimin buying him and his best friend matching necklaces or something?

hear me out

its christmas day and Jimin passes you a small black box

inside is a necklace with a small key on it and engraved onto the key is “PJM 1995″ 

and you’re like “why have you gotten me a necklace with YOUR initials and birth year”

and then he shows you his necklace and it has your initials and your birth year

like this idea is so cute it makes me so soft sjweufbewjfn

will flirt with you just to make you laugh or maybe because he loves you or wHaTeVeR

he gives the best hugs

like BTS have already confirmed this in an interview

if you’re feeling down and need a hug, Jimin is your man 

he is always with you

and if he isn’t, then he is texting you

you guys are inseparable

if he gets drunk around you then you’re gonna have this clingy, sappy, emotional, koala of a man wrapped around you for the night because he will not leave your side even for a second

its cute tho

but that also means he has a hard time during tour because you are usually not there with him

always drags you to his family parties and such 

you love to go, and he knows you do, but you always whine when he asks you just to make him laugh 

his mom loves you!!

not gonna lie she ships you both and when you go see her, Jimin has to beg her not to say anything about it to you

he loves to rest his head on your shoulder and you like to do the same

G I G G L E S

If you mention how short he is then good luck because he’s gonna chase you down and tickle you until he hears an apology

not that he really cares though

he just jumps at any chance to see a smile on your face

KIM TAEHYUNG

personal hype man

his camera roll is full of pictures of you

hates it when you’re sad

if you’re sad then just letting you know you’re in for a treat

he would organise a sleepover and would aim to cheer you up for the entire night

you always laugh at his pingu impression 

you’re like Yeontan’s mom 

yeontan l o v e s you

you’ll go to Tae’s house and as soon as you open the door, yeontan will run straight to you 

you walk yeontan together at night whilst you share headphones listening to whatever’s on tae’s playlist

recommends you music because hands down this boy has the best taste in music FITE ME

He’s a big fan of skinship so people actually mistake you guys for a couple sometimes

plays with your hair all the time

your parents love him and treat him like he’s part of the family

your parents would genuinely love it if you two dated 

Tae doesn’t mind it when they ask you questions like

“so are you two together yet?”

but you get annoyed purely because you find it so embarrassing

Tae just laughs it off and makes a joke out of it

“no i could never date y/n because her feet smell”

if you need a hug, he’s there

and he’ll sway you side to side and by the end of it you’re laughing so much because he’s hella goofy and you love it

JEON JUNGKOOK

Bullies you all day everyday (but you know he’s only joking)

sends you memes when you both should be asleep

he definitely has a crush on you or at least he has had one at some point in time

doesn’t stop teasing you

he’s so competitive and has to prove he’s better than you in everything

likes to hug you from behind

eats steals your food

you constantly steal his hoodies and he gets annoyed

but he can’t stay mad at you for too long though

he lives for your compliments

though it normally ends up with you playfully hitting his chest when his ego grows a little too big

he is never serious with you

always has his arm around you, it’s like a habit

always stares at you 

always bursts into your room to hang out and then ends up sleeping in your bed

when he’s feeling cocky, he takes his shirt off and tries to make you feel his muscles

when he’s all sweaty from either going to the gym or dance practice, he makes it his mission to find you and get you to hug him while you’re screaming that he’s all sweaty and “gross”

the guys are convinced you two are dating

and Guk lowkey wishes you were but you didn’t hear that from me ;)

he wants you to play with his hair 24/7

being best friends with him means that, if you weren’t already into video games, then you definitely are now