#meddlesome ninjas

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Thinking on Meddlesome Ninjas…

I think how the Gang gets into the Naruto world is that they were busy dealing with a Wizard when at the same time Obito was being his stalker self and watching Kakashi. The universes were close enough that the magic the wizard used smacked into the dimension bullshit and then…

Kakashi: *dramatically sighing at the memorial stone*

Portal: YEET! *a bunch of young adults, a dog and some old guy come out of nowhere with an orange masked guy*

Kakashi: WHAT?! *ninja time*

It launches into this huge thing where the gang have to stop the wizard, the orange mask guy vanished and Kakashi ends up helping with the wizard who ends up knifed cause ninjas.

They’re then taken to T&I because suspicious. Luckily they all know Japanese: Daphne because her parents had buisness partners and they wanted to make a good impression so she learned and kept it up. Velma because of research reasons and like translations only go so far so it’s best to read the source materials and of COURSE she also learned to speak it cause why wouldn’t she? Shaggy learned it from a guy in his unit while he was in the army, and then kept it up more so when he learned how to cook because he likes Japanese food. Scooby picked it up from Shaggy. Fred is a weeb so he learned it to.

So after a few days they all came to the conclusions of magic and jutsu gone wrong, remembering the orange guy. So the entire population knows some rando was around. Yikes. And now the gang can’t go home.

Which for some of them? Sucks. Velma loves her grandpa who raised her and now he’s gonna die without her ever seeing him again. Fred mourns his parents so deeply it hurts. Daphne and Shaggy? Shaggy’s an orphan and Daphne got disowned for going off to solve mysteries. They’re good.

The group settles in. Fred’s skill with traps is noted and he somehow gets drafted to teach at the academy. Daphne’s fashion and ability to pick things out gets her noticed by T&I along with the infiltration units. Velma throws herself into learning and then suddenly she’s in research going through things. Shaggy, former army and not into doing that again after what happened (ninja gear what happened and accept it) wanders until he gets a job at a ramen stand.

Ya’ll know where this is going. Sort of.

Naruto just entered the academy and Fred already notices how stiff people are around this kid. He’s instantly suspicious. He tells his friends this. They begin to pick apart the mystery.

Well except Shaggy who meets the kid at work, listens to things and goes to the Hokage with his friends.

Shaggy: like dude, your people suck at keeping secrets man.

Sarutobi: oh?

Shaggy: Velma found mention of Jinchuriki in a book, and the Kyuubi attacked six years ago. Then I overheard a bunch of people saying Naruto is a demon brat. Like dude.

This leads to Sarutobi waking up a bit and paying attention to shit that’s going down because Danzo was convincing him shit was fine.

Hahahahhaha… no.

Then one day at their place Shaggy shows up with Naruto and goes: I have a son now.

And the gang accepts it and they all live happily, even as other romances enters their life such as Velma helping figure out how to rip a curse seal off someone which leads to her getting jumped by Anko. Then Daphne dragging Fred to offialize a marriage. And Shaggy seducing Chouza along with his wife with food.

And of course the baby gang happens but that’s a little later.

[fluffyfranny]

Cookies of Salem AU Pt.2: The Mafia

*incoming transmission* "Townie Cookies! Can you hear me? This is Ninja Cookie, reporting in. I've been picking up on some suspicious activity scattered amongst our households. Upon further investigation, myself, Almond and Walnut Cookie have come to make a grim statement... The Mafia have arrived, and some faces aren't so friendly... In fact, none of them are welcome sights... Anyway, I'm sending a log of the members I've managed to pick up information on, but just be warned... Things won't look good for us if we keep them around... Stay safe out there...over and out." *end of transmission* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mafia Cookies of Salem

Disguiser: Lychee Dragon Cookie

-Having preferred to take on the form of the curious, young Mangosteen Cookie, the Violet Dragon has changed her ways of trickery and makes her disguises more... gruesome.

How gruesome are we talking? Instead of just mere illusionry, Lychee will mold pieces of her fallen victims to herself in order to appear innocent tangibly for a potential run-in with Almond Cookie, or even worse, that snooty little daughter of his...

And cast a glamour on the corpse of the actual victim to make it appear as her until the moon rises and the spell can wear off and the body can be disposed of.

However, she will still cast a glamour on herself to still appear as the whole Cookie she wishes to take up the guise of.

For if not for her enhanced trickery, anyone's hands would pass right through the fake parts of her disguise, foiling her fun right before it could start...

Forger: Snake Fruit Cookie

-Having the ability to lie right through his pointed teeth, the assistant to the Ivory Dragon has developed the ability to lie on paper, as well.

Once his snake minions bring back information on a potential victim, he relays the message to his fellow Mafia Cookies and recommends that they target the Cookie in question so, once they turn up dead, the Town will be able to see his handiwork in the form of their rewritten last will.

"A little bit of thisss, a little note of that, and now you'll look sussspicioussss to the entire Town! A pity that you crumbled too sssoon before we could put your wicked "deedsss" to justice, hehehe..."

Framer: Affogato Cookie

-For this former attendant to Dark Cacao Cookie, a severe case of deja vu is about to begin.

Except this time, his work will flourish and not be snuffed out by some meddlesome, adventuring Cookies...

With his smooth way of talking and access to plenty of dark magic to not only cover up his tracks, but stain the reputation of others, this trickster is bound to achieve his goal of creating a land for himself once and for all! With the help of his fellow no-good Cookies, of course...

First up on his list, that damned Lookout...

Hypnotist: Lilac Cookie

-Earning the nickname, "The Crimson Dusk," Lilac Cookie has a knack for inducing a hypnotic effect on Cookies that are to become his unlucky, unsuspecting victims.

Not only does Lilac possess his typical razor-sharp chakrams and soothing flowery scent, but he now has the ability to plant memories in an unconscious Cookie's mind for when they wake up, ranging from supposedly being attacked and healed when nobody else visited their home, except for him, to apparently going out of their way and either attacking or role-blocking another Cookie...

When in reality, it was the victim who was mentally assaulted by the Cookie as elusive and deadly as the night...

Janitor: Hydrangea Cookie

-As the attendant to the renowned Lotus Dragon, Hydrangea Cookie is well-known for keeping up a dainty, cleanly appearance at all times, even in these unforeseen and downright grisly times.

However, nowadays, she isn't opposed to getting her hands dirty, literally, even while she's disposing of evidence for the good of the Mafia and sweeping up a crumbled Cookie, hiding any indication of the deceased's role.

After all, Cookies are bound to get soggy at one point or another, now aren't they? Even if it's not by water, but from their own jam...

Ambusher: Scorpion Cookie

-Combine her and Lilac, and you've got a pair to be reckoned with, even amongst your own ranks of the Mafia...

"Stealth" is practically her middle name and the basis of her job description; she lies in wait by a target's house, stinger full to the brim with venom, and waits...

Then strikes at the first person she sees at the front porch, even if it may not be the homeowner. She can even break through tough Bodyguard vests and dissolve the Trapper's creations.

However, any that visit the targeted household will be notified of her presence, and her intent...

Best pray to the Witches that she be the only one visiting tonight...

Godfather: Dark Choco Cookie

-Forget about the throne; instead of a prince, he's a lord...

A crime lord...

Having lost his place in line for the throne of the Dark Cacao Kingdom, this fallen member of royalty has pursued a different way of being the epitome of leadership.

And he's found it...

With a ragtag group of no-good Cookies from all Kingdoms and Valleys alike, scouted out by himself and his fellow former Cookie of Darkness, Red Velvet Cookie. He seeks to influence and spread his own wave of fear like Dark Enchantress has already done.

'God' does have a nice ring to it in his job title, though...

He loves this so much more than ‘king…’

Mafioso: Red Velvet Cookie

-As Godfather Choco's right-hand man (no pun intended), this Cookie and Cake hybrid does a good portion of the dirty work. Specifically, he's basically the hitman that takes out any target Choco demands of him to eliminate.

Except, there's a problem. If he wants to crumble someone in particular, and it's not who Choco wishes to rid of, then his plans are dashed.

Maybe if he forgets to act on one specific, light-hearted Cookie, then he will...

Consort: Rose Cookie

-It certainly takes two to tango, and Rose Cookie loves having this as her personal motto.

On par with Kumiho as a master of distraction, the dancer is more... thorny with her methods of occupation. And no, she isn't able to kill, just flirtatiously make victims unaware and nothing more...

And, like Kumiho, she is also susceptible to patrons who... despise interruptions if she isn't careful...

Consigliere: Lotus Dragon Cookie

-Already knowing every Cookie's greatest wish, the Blue Dragon knows every bit about their being, heart and soul and all...

Their duties specifically involve scoping out pieces of evidence that directly give away their target's role. It could be a trinket they carry, a catchphrase under their breath, or a mere force of habit.

But they already knew all that, too... it's their specialty.

Blackmailer: Rougefort Cookie

-Calling cards? Forget about it!

This thief of the night instead stuffs his envelopes to the brim with evidence: message records, receipts, anything you could imagine to stir the pot of the victim's darkest secrets...

How he got ahold of these top-secret items that should have been buried in the past, nobody knows! Nobody except for him, of course...

After all, he did rob their places prior moving to Salem. Now he just has to ensure that the pesky Townies stay quiet.

And with his methods, he's sure they will...

[kudouusagi]

I still haven’t been able to get scans of the booklet that comes with volume 2 (if anyone has it already send it my way!) but I found this picture from inside the booklet.

This time, I, the hero, will introduce you to the monsters of crazy rock.

Slime (Reki) HP: 1000 Location: Skatepark where you can see the ocean Special ability: Customizing skateboards Trivia: He's meddlesome, loud, and really salty

Troll (Langa) HP: 1200 Location: Skatepark where you can see the ocean Special ability：Snowboarding Trivia ：He spaces out. He often trips over things and falls.

Goblin (Shadow) HP: 1200 Location: Flower shop Special ability: Making flower bouquets Trivia: He's in love with the manager of the flower shop

Ninja (Cherry blossom) HP: 1100 Location: Shopping district Special ability: Programing Trivia: He gets angry if you touch Carla.

Minotaur (Joe) HP: 2200 Location: Restaurant Special ability: Grabbing hold of your stomach Trivia: Muscles won't betray you

Demon Lord (ADAM) HP: ??? Location: Crazy Rock Special ability: Dancing skating Trivia : It is said that those who have seen under the mask have been met with terrifying eyes......

[the-nysh]

One of the Machine God's mentions that Kuseno is the 23rd person on their hitlist, so one has to wonder what else they've been doing behind the scenes in this arc.

🤔🤔 Totally up to no good, these Organization guys have been busy. (More than just handing out Neo Hero suits, secretly forming an army, and targeting Sonic & Garou to 'take in' too.) Including eradicating any possible meddlesome threats or competition to their goals??? Who knows; seems they already have many avenues covered. Wonder if Dr. Genus (with Zombieman) has had them pay him a visit too...? Who else might they target next?! D: Seems Genos decisively knows that ignoring them to run away is out of the question, as they'd only grow worse and just track you down anyway. (Wonder what the ninjas would think about that..) So they and their plans must be stopped. Hopefully he & Saitama can get to the bottom of it soon...

[dreaming-of-assclass]

this is kind of a weird ship, but do u have any nagisa/terasaka headcanons?

Listen, this is a blog that supports Karma x Maehara. There are no weird ships here UwU.

Ooohh...I imagine it takes a while to develop feelings since things are a little complicated after...the whole grenade incident

But Nagisa forgives him, and Terasaka develops and grows past that, so it’s all good.

Alright, headcanons time!

Terasaka will beat anyone who makes gender jokes or cross dressing comments...like, him and the squad will fuck that person up.

Nagisa is similarly protective and tries to casually intervene with topic changes or blunt comments if someone is making fun of Terasaka’a dumbness.

They can’t hold hands very long because it starts to hurt after a while...the difference in hand size is too much lol.

Nagisa helps him study whenever he can, although Terasaka is less than willing to actually listen. Maybe he’ll pay attention for a hug though...

Lots of piggyback rides haha. Nagisa appreciates the free ride, and Terasaka basically just uses him as a weight.

They try to get each other into their respective interests. Nagisa shows him Sonic Ninja, while Terasaka takes him to the gym once in a while.

Nagisa asks for his hoodie once, and Terasaka gives it without another thought. Nagisa ends up collecting quite a few.

Terasaka vents often, usually about little things that just really bothered him and whatnot. And Nagisa always sits patiently and listens. Soon Terasaka feels better, they hug and watch movies or wrestling shows to calm down together.

Terasaka can COOK, and best believe, he shows it off trying to make Nagisa’s favorite foods sometimes. It’s a really sweet gesture UwU and always turns out delicious.

The squad is so meddlesome sometimes, but they’re all cool with Nagisa. They trust that he’s a good guy and will make Terasaka happy

[introuvaille]

Things Just Ain't the Same When the Hunter Gets Captured by the Game

Title: Things Just Ain't the Same When the Hunter Gets Captured by the Game Author: barspoon Rating: Mature Length: >100k words Genre: Humor, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Romance Summary: When a friendship that turns into a bromance trips over an awkward series of events before stumbling into romance because Kakashi won't look where he's going, Naruto never pays attention, Kurama is antagonistic and meddlesome, and their friends are scheming ninjas, this is what happens. Note: Can also be found on FFN here

[aurora-the-kunoichi]

Ok this is a little short story I’m writing for my friend @blossom-skies based on her rp with her OC Jen. This will be a 2 to 3 part story. I hope she and you enjoy it!

Meeting Ms. Jones

Part 1 

Jen lay at the bottom of her cold lonely cell, pain still ravaging her tired and worn body. The darkness seeped into her soul taking away the warm thoughts of the warm summer air somewhere outside these god damned walls and the slowly fading hope she would be saved. She had lost track of time as the hours and days drifted by endlessly as she stared at the ceiling of this hell hole. Was it days ago or was it months ago that she was taken from the comfort of her home?

Jen’s brother Casey had told her about Karai and the two criminals that Baxter Stockman and Oroku Saki had mutated into a giant rhino and a wart hog a few years ago. She thought the story was entertaining but when the female ninja and the two mutants showed up at her door for an unwanted house call Jen was no longer amused. But she was a Jones so like hell if she was going down without a fight.

In the end Jen’s street smarts and ability to kick some ass was no match for two mutated overachieving lumbering fools and a trained assassin. The next thing she knew Jen woke up strapped to a freezing examination table and the missing scientist from TCRI hovering over her with a syringe filled with some sort of florescent purple liquid.

Adjusting his glasses Dr Baxter Stockman leaned down waving the syringe in her face, “So Ms. Jones, it took us a bit to track you down but Karai always gets her man…well woman I should say. Since we haven’t been able to locate your brother Casey Jones and Ms O’Neil you were the next best thing.”

Jen had no idea what was going on? What did this idiot want with her brother and his girlfriend?  Testing the restraints that held her in place she started to struggle. “What do you want with my brother?”

“We just want to ask him a few questions that’s all, but I guess you’ll have to do for now.” Lifting the syringe up to his eyes he flicked the cylinder raising the bubbles to the top before expelling them from the needle with a single push on the plunger.  

Jen watched the purple liquid squirt from the tip of the needle landing on the table next her bound hand. “W-whats in that?” she stammered suddenly getting a little nervous. This was a world renowned genius who went off the deep end when he met the Shredder. Casey had told her what he did and what he was capable of and now she was at his mercy holding a strange looking substance.

“Oh my dear this ol thing?” he waved the syringe theatrically in her face again giving her a sickening smile. “This is liquid motivation. I need some information from you Ms. Jones and if you corporate you’re free to go but if you…..disappoint me this lovely purple ooze will transform you into something of nightmares. You saw our sweet and gentle Beebop and Rocksteady right? That could be you.”

Jen felt the knot coil in her stomach; this was not good, defiantly not good.

“The turtles bitch, where are they?” Jen heard a venomous voice call behind her. Twisting as much as her restraints would allow Jen arched to see Karai come into view, the scowl on her face contorting her feminine Japanese features.

“Turtles?” Jen felt the word roll from her lips in confusion. What were they getting at? What about turtles?

“Don’t play dumb with me Ms Jones, your brother is friends with those meddlesome mutant turtles and my master wants them and you will give them to me.” Stockman hissed positioning the syringe’s needle down aimed for her flesh.

Jen began to struggle again, fear fueling the hard snaps of her wrists. “I don’t know what you’re talking about? I don’t know anything about any fucking turtles? Jesus Christ please I don’t want to be a mutant!” the tone in her voice began to rise into hysteria as the needle lowered to the crook of her arm.

“Where are they?” he asked again looking up at Karai seeming to be looking for permission.

“I told you! I don’t know!”

“Is that your final answer Jen? Karai smirked resting her hands on either side of Jen’s head staring intently down into her frantic eyes. “Stockman here is very eager to see if the ooze he created is the same as the stuff that mutated Beebop and Rocksteady. And he needs a willing test subject to try it on and you my dear are about to volunteer if you don’t give us what we want.”

Jen’s eyes moved from Karai’s cool and collected gaze to the maddening dark pools of the scientist. Tears threatened to spill forth from her eyes, she didn’t want to mutant but she was a Jones and Jones don’t cry. She could hear her dads voice whisper in the back of her head, “You’re stronger then you know.” Gaining the resolve she needed from her father’s words she spat in the mad scientists face. “I don’t know about any mutant turtles but if I did I wouldn’t tell you!”  

Needless to say Stockman got his test subject and now Jen was moaning in pain on the cold cell floor, god knows where as the mutation reached its end. Jen didn’t have a mirror to see it but she could feel the changes. Her skin was no longer smooth but rough and from what little light that filtered through the bared window on her cell door from the hallway she could see blue and purple. Her skin wasn’t the most alarming change though, not by a long shot. Dragging behind her lay a long curled tail which she could control, that was sort of cool. Her five fingers were reduced to three and her toes down to two. Thankfully her hair still sat on her head and she could tell something was changing with her eyesight. The dark shapes of her cell were starting to sharpen and become visible and it wasn’t from her eyes adjusting to the dark. It was something more, something to do with her mutation.

The tingling in her body receded and the mind numbing all over ache faded as Jen let out a shaky breath curling up into a ball. As the numbing pain finally began to give her reprieve her worn out body relaxed letting her fall deep into blissful unconsciousness. She wanted to go home, but how was she going to get out of here?

A loud explosion rocked her confinement jostling her from her sleep.  Ignoring the dull ache in her limps Jen scrambled to her feet peering out of her cell door her new three fingered hands clutching the metal bars. Again another explosion rang out but this time the large door at the end of the hallway blew off its hinges. The repercussion from the blast sent her sailing backwards slamming into the makeshift cot.

“Jennifer!” a muffled familiar voice cut through the ringing in her ears. “JEN!”

“Cas?” Jen coughed trying to get to her feet. Smoke and flying debris clouded the hallway keeping her brother from her sight. “CASEY!” Jen managed to scramble to her feet and back to her cell door reaching out into the void grasping for her salvation.

“Jen! Where are you?” she could hear him coughing his voice getting closer.

“I’m at the end in a cell!”

“Hey Casey, is she in here?” Another voice came through the confusion and Jen tried to see who was with her brother.

“Leo, yeah she’s in here! Where’s Raphael we might need him?”

“Right here Jones.” A deep voice with a prominent New York accent came after her brothers.

As the dust began to settle Jen could see three silhouettes making their way towards her. One she could see was her brother but the other two were large with unnatural bulk, and they were definitely not human. Which brought reality slamming back reminding her she was no longer human as well. Her heart jumped into her throat as her tail uncoiled slapping against the cool floor, her brother didn’t know, he didn’t fucking know and he was about to see her. A strangled cry came from her throat unexpectedly as she retreated back into the corner, into the shadows.

“Jen!?” Casey cried out reaching her cell his body slamming into the metal.

“Wait!” Jen screamed wrapping her arms around her changed body.

“Jen, what are you talking about? We’re getting you out of there. Raph! Get this door off!”

Within seconds the door began to creak and moan under the pressure of this Raphael’s strength. Fear raced through her realizing Casey was about to see her in her new form and she could feel something happening with her skin. Instinct took over and she pressed back up against the wall as the door was ripped from its hinges and thrown to the side. A large shadow retreated as Casey came hurtling through the door his eyes searching frantically in the darkened room. His eyes passed over her never focusing in on her form. Did he not see her?

“Jen?” his voice was strained unable to find his little sister.

Again his gaze moved over where she was standing and still nothing. He couldn’t see her? Then two large green bodies came through the door distracting Jen from her distraught brother. They were huge and from what she could deduce they were turtles. Wait! Turtles?! These were the turtles Stockboy and Karai were looking for?

One was larger than the other; the bigger one had a tattered red bandanna over his head the tails dangling down the front of his chest. Wrapped around his impressively muscled body and massive shell was a harness that came over his broad shoulders and around his waist meeting at the lower center of his plastron. The only piece of clothing he was wearing was a grey pair of shorts held up with a white belt. On his left should was a lone shoulder pad for some sort of protection?  In his green three fingered hands he held sai dripping with blood. The one word that came to mind when she looked at him was brute.

Jens’ eyes drifted to the slightly smaller one just beside him but there was no mistaking he was equally as intimidating as the red brute. Around his green scalp was a blue mask highlighting his dazzling blue eyes, momentarily awe struck Jen needed to remind herself to breath. His body wasn’t as bulky as the brute but he was leaner and seemed deadlier. Sitting diagonal across his plastron was his leather harness and in his hands were twin katanas. He too had on black shorts with knees pads with some weird homemade Japanese sandals? This one made her heart race, this mutant turtle undeniably got her attention.

Her brother’s calls brought her back to the present and Jen swallowed readying her unsteady voice. “Cas, something happened to me. They changed me. Baxter Stockman injected me with a purple ooze.”

With the mention of the purple ooze Jen noticed the flinch in the two mutant turtles that turned their heads in the direction of her voice.

“What are you talking about Jen? I can hear you but I can’t see you? What’s going on?”

“Casey you have to promise not to freak out please. This is hard enough for me already.” She could hear her own voice trembling as she spoke.

Casey straightened his back preparing himself for whatever he was about to see and nodded.

This was her older brother, he would love her no matter what she had to remind herself. Jen took a deep breath and felt her skin scrawl for a few seconds and she stepped forward into the light. She watched her older brothers eyes widen in shock his mouth opening in a silent gasp but thankfully took a step towards her instead of back his hands outstretched for his sister.

“Oh Jen.” Casey whispered.

She could hear the two mutant turtles behind her brother breaths hitch and whisper at the same time, “What the shell?”

[kokosnuss-jaguar]

Oh..I wrote the second chapter! I think I just call this ff Secret Warrior or something.

Sorry if there are any typos!

Chapter Two

-Trapped-

The next morning, Lloyd was the first to be awake. Getting ready for his daily training, he normally would wake up the others too. But not today. He felt like doing some training alone, to help him sort out his mind about that mysterious guy from yesterday.

Once he stepped out of the front door -the sun just slowly rising at the horizont- he had to think back when he was still younger. He never liked getting up early to train. Much like the other Ninja. Being thrown out of the comfortable bed by his uncle with whatever nerve-wrecking loud object he could find and he wouldn’t stop until everyone of them got up. He thought he would never change in that regard. But now here he was. Getting used to it through the years, he even liked the quiet and peaceful early mornings. How ironic.

“Alright, time for a warm-up..”, he said to himself, before closing his eyes and starting to move his arms around. He was just a few minutes in and he already felt more relaxed. The whole incident from yesterday felt like just another one of the daily occurrences happening in Ninjago city. But then that familiar feeling from yesterday hit him again, causing him to snap out of his movements and stumble backwards. He wasn’t imagining things. His feeling wouldn’t lie to him. The next question however confronting him..was it even possible? Lloyd had seen enough of crazy and impossible things in his life, that this one almost appeared as reasonable. His gaze wandered up to the sky, the sun now already high enough, to throw her light over the temple. He would need to do some research on that matter. Tonight. When the others were asleep.

“You want some scrambled eggs too?” Lloyd looked up from his cup of tea and stared at Zane for a good 20 seconds before answering. “Sounds good.” The Nindroid nodded pleased and went back to cooking. Kai and Nya, who had both noticed Lloyds slow reaction, shared a glance. It was still morning and almost all of the other Ninja have gotten up. Minus Jay, who was apparently still asleep. “Should I wake him up?”, Cole asked with a growing smile. A bit too much of a happy face for Nya’s taste, but before she could reply, her brother was already faster. “If you insist. Lets see how long it’ll takes you.” “Be right back!” Nya pushed Kai offended, but he only made a gesture towards the green Ninja. “We may should talk with him now, as long as Cole is gone?!”, he whispered to her. Nya blinked surprised. “Didn’t we agree to wait?” “We did. Now we talk. He doesn’t even realise we talk about him right now!” “Fine!”, she whispered back, but it sounded more like a hiss. “Lloyd?” He looked up again. “Yes?” “About yesterday night. Kai and I noticed you were a bit absent-minded.” He tilted his head slightly to the side, his eyes wandering up almost like he needed to think of an answer. But finally he just shrugged, a small smile scurrying over his face. “Could be. It was an eventful day yesterday.” “Nothing to do with that weird guy we were chasing?”, Kai redrilled. “No. Just some guy I have no idea about who they are.” “So you couldn’t recognise them?” Lloyd groaned and rolled his eyes, clearly showing all this questioning already started to annoy him. Which only made it more suspicious for the siblings. “Kai. It was night and dark. The fact he wore black as well, wasn’t helping.” The two looked at each other. It didn’t seem like Lloyd was willing to tell them, just what was going on yesterday and none of them knew what to say to change his mind. They all sat there in an awkward silence, before Cole returned again. Behind him, a quite sour looking Jay. Turned out, he just threw him out of his bed. While Nya hold Cole a curtain lecture about her disagreeing with those kind of jokes, Lloyd ate the last bit of the scrambled egg Zane brought him earlier and then slid unnoticed out of the kitchen.

The rest of the day went on pretty uneventful. Minus the intense training. “Lack of agillity? You must be kidding me!”, the fire Ninja complained and gestured wildly with his arms. “We are Ninja. We have perfected it!” “Tell that to the guy who outrun you yesterday.”, Lloyd replied unimpressed and raised an eyebrow. Kai opened his mouth, about to give a reply, but quickly decided against it and remained quiet. “Thought so. Well then, let’s start the training.” “Does it really has to be about running? I don’t like running..” Lloyd sighed: “It’s a diversion from our usual training, so I expected more enthusiasm.” “We would be..if it wasn’t about-..” “..running, I know! Everyone ready?” The others groaned, more or less excited.

“Oof, I am one tired Ninja..” “Ditto..”, Jay yawned and stumbled into his. “Remember. Tomorrow we continue!”, Lloyd said, who remained at the door entrance, way too energetic after all this training. “Yeah, yeah..”, Kai mumbled into his pillow. The green Ninja smiled pleased and left, closing the door quietly behind him.

The night over the city was calm and peaceful. Lloyd let his gaze wander over the many lights and, for a few minutes, just took the pretty sight in. But he wasn’t here for sight seeing. He was here to search after that mysterious person from yesterday. Yet even after an hour of scanning through the city, there was no sight of them. Finally he decided to return home and try his luck the next night, when a loud noise caught his attention. Upon his investigation, he found a group of troublemakers surrounding a couple by the looks of it, right on the open street. “Tsk, quite the meddlesome bunch. They are in for a-…what?!” He stopped in his movement, when a familiar figure appeared out of seemingly nowhere. “…look what the cat dragged out..”, he smirked. The urge to jump into action too was strong, but at the same time he was afraid he would scare them off right away. This would only mess with his intended plan. It was at least a good way to study their fighting style. Surely it wasn’t on his level of experience, but it was enough to give those guys a run for their money. He nodded to himself, when from the edge of his eye he noticed a movement. “Oh no you don’t!” It only took Lloyd about a second to knock the bad guy out who tried to attack from behind, but he didn’t expect the mysterious person to flee the scene the minute he appeared. With the couple safe (Lloyd inquired it), he had to play the old catch game again. Bad for them, he cut their way off and now, he had them right where he wanted them to be..

[tancong]

Gency Zine Piece

Two lovebirds find themselves in the countryside of Zurich, all alone to enjoy each other and the wonderful sounds of nature.

My piece for the Gency Zine! I was super, ultra blessed to get to collab with @usatherei who made a piece so beautiful that I had to stop writing to cry from happiness. Please go love her blog by clicking on her name or the picture!!!

Also big thank you to everyone involved in the fic and especially @squiddyart and @the-bored-bookworm for hosting the zine!!!! It's been a wonderful experience that could not have been complete without everyone.

Title: The Birds and the Bunns Word Count: 1949 Rating: G Summary: Two lovebirds find themselves in the countryside of Zurich, all alone to enjoy each other and the wonderful sounds of nature.

“What do they mean by ‘the lake was blue’? Is it some form of literary symbolism for the sadness the character felt?” inquired the curious young man.

“No, I think the lake was actually blue Genji. Not everything has to be so deep and filled with literary elements. Besides, wouldn’t he be happy to be there with his lover?”

Genji considered this point for a moment as his own lover paused in her reading to give him an inquisitive frown coupled with a raised eyebrow as if to highlight her annoyance over the fact his meddlesome question broke her immersion, but the amused smile playing at the edge of her lips told a different tale. His brows eventually raised up, as if conceding the fair point and smiled innocently over at Angela. With that, her frown disappeared as she couldn’t help but smile back, playfully sticking her tongue out at him.

That quickly changed as she retracted it, Genji kissing her gently on the lips soon after before pulling back with a sly smile on his expression. Angela frowned at him for the audacious attempt to stop her from sticking her tongue out at him. While she didn’t mind in other scenarios, they were supposed to be enjoying a nice time together in the quiet forest. Not trying to ruin the natural beauty and sounds of nature with their own.

“Genji, I thought we had planned on enjoying a quiet evening reading together. I even agreed to be the one doing the reading.”

Genji nodded, still smiling sweetly at her as if he was not at fault for anything at all. “We did. And you’re doing wonderfully my dear. Your voice is as sweet as ever and the story is lovely.”

She continued to gaze at him, trying to find a crack in that smile of his and to break his façade. When she could not, Angela let out a soft sigh and she sunk comfortably back into him with a smile of resignation, right into the crook of his arm that seemed to have been made to fit her perfectly inside.

Genji himself was rather fond of the position as well. The feeling of her soft shoulder against his chest, albeit separated by a single layer of cloth in the form of his shirt, felt heavenly and he wanted nothing more than to hold her in his arm forever. On several occasion, he would run his hand through her hair, down her neatly tied pigtails before coming back to rest at her side once more. It was nothing more than an idle endearing touch but by now, it came naturally to him.

Without a single bit of discomfort, their sitting position placed him slightly above her head, allowing him to kiss her however he wished and enjoy the sweet fragrance of her hair while he was not too busy shuffling around to do so. In that moment, he didn’t want to move anywhere and for any reason. The birds around them continued to do their calls and there was a deer in the near distance, gazing at them as if to concede its position as the most serene sight in the forest.

“If you don’t keep it down, you’re going to scare all the animals away Genji. I’m rather fond of them you know. I know that having a dragon spirit attracts them but if you keep making such a ruckus …” She was reduced to a small indignant noise under his continual assault of small kisses against her forehead and cheek as she tried to lecture him, making her pout angrily at him.

Genji chuckled at the sight before patting her head with his left hand to bring her pout down to a soft frown as she pressed herself toward him. “Alright, alright. I promise to do my best to not scare the animals away. Not the deer, the Bastion peacefully bird-catching nearby, or the small army of bunnies that you’ve amassed with your adorable charm. Let’s keep going.”

Angela stuck her tongue out at him before quickly turning toward the open book in her lap once more. There were several bunnies of various sizes around them. Genji was petting one with his right hand as they had their exchange, only now resting it upon his knee once more. Angela had a few by her side as well, some nipping at her dress without any harm and one taking a nap on her foot. Bunnies were pensive creatures and often moved but for now, they all seemed to enjoy the area of Zurich that the two occupied and braved their presence to be there.

Perhaps it was because they sat in a serene area under the shade of a tree, surrounded by safe bushes that they can flee to in case of danger. Maybe the protective aura of the animalistic dragon spirit reassured them. In any case, they were a welcome audience to the couple’s time together, despite how much the small fluffy creatures enjoyed hopping around and distracting the lover’s hands from their respective spots on their partner or book. Either that or they were quite happily occupying the cozy locations under the couple’s legs.

Regardless of the reason, Angela resumed her reading to her audience. Genji gazed down at the book, though he wasn’t exactly focused on the words. He was quite fond of simply following along at her reading pace using his ears, opting instead to use his eyes for observing the patterns the words made on the page. His gaze inevitably found its way to her hand, already memorized by his own from how much he held them. He stopped himself from staring at her face for too long, despite how much he enjoyed seeing her soft expression as she read for him.

After a few dozen pages, Angela suddenly fell silent. Genji made a move to turn his head, only to feel her own rest against his shoulder gently. He smiled to himself and nuzzled his cheek against her hair, closing his own eyes in sync with her without a word as the pair enjoyed a brief moment of silence. Angela knew that it was probably just a moment though. While her dear lover was capable of several hours in meditation, he was not that way around her. He always avoided the question somehow, enough times to deter her from trying to understand why.

He was being rather tame actually, seeing as how long he allowed her to just lean against him in that silence. Angela smiled to herself, wondering just how long he would hold out for. The adorable ninja she loved couldn’t possibly go for more than 5 minutes without trying to tease his lover. That was a fact she knew for certain.

Despite his cybernetics not having clockwork installed, he acted as predicted when the time came. Angela could barely contain her giggle as he stirred next to her, feeling the movement of his body indicative of a gaze toward her before he moved once more to glance around, doubtlessly searching for something to annoy her with.

“Hey Angela, what’s that over there?”

She tried, she really did, to appear annoyed at her lover’s antics. However, that proved impossible as she smiled to herself and finally opened her eyes to look at him before following the direction that he was pointing.

“That would be a bird. A sparrow specifically. How quaint for one to visit you.”

Genji smiled at her and petted her head as if to reward her for her smart answer. She allowed it for now. After all, despite her insistence against receiving them at the risk of ruining her hair, she loved the feeling of his hand petting her so affectionately.

“What about that one over there?” came another inquisitive point of the finger.

“That’s actually still the same sparrow Genji. I’m sure you can keep track of one bird with those trained eyes of yours.”

Genji frowned as he looked around once more, his eyes lighting up as he spotted yet another subject of interest. “Ooh, what about that one over there?”

Angela looked over and made an expression of disbelief before sighing, closing her book all the way and setting it on her lap as she turned her head to frown at him. “Genji. That’s a squirrel.”

Genji squinted at it for a moment, pretending to not notice Angela’s intent stare before he smiled sheepishly at her. She pouted at him before being finding herself with a kiss to her forehead. Angela frowned some more, receiving yet another one, before pulling him in by the collar and kissing him on the lips. Satisfied with his pleasantly shocked expression afterward, she smiled at him once more. However, her lover was far from finished with her.

Without missing a beat, he pointed at yet another object in the near distance. “What about those over there Angela?”

Angela sighed softly and looked over, only to whip her head back and glare at Genji. He clearly knew what he was pointing at. He can clearly see what was happening. There was no way he was actually asking about what two birds were. In fact, they were still sparrows.

“Genji, you know fully well what they are and what they’re doing.”

Genji gave her an inquisitive raise of his eyebrow, though his eyes couldn’t hide their glint of mischief. “I’m not sure I follow you, doctor. Could you explain what they’re doing to me? Maybe show me an example in human terms and some hands-on training too.”

Angela’s cheeks flushed as she maintained her glare, turning herself free from the comfortable spot in his arm. “Genji Shimada! We are having a nice date under a tree peacefully reading a book. I thought we agreed that this would be the plan for today.”

Genji nodded, “Yes we did. However, we seemed to have finished and I have been entranced instead by your overwhelming beauty and adorable pout. Well, it’s a glare now, which, in my opinion, is unwarranted for such a harmless question.”

He knew just the right way to poke at her, didn’t he? At his praise and coy words, Angela was reduced to a pout as she could not find words to retaliate. So instead, Genji chuckled and leaned in to end his teasing with a gentle kiss to her lips. They stayed there, long past the moment when her expression fully softened and surrendered to her lover’s lips.

When they parted breathlessly, Genji gave her a soft smile. “Thank you for the wonderful story, my dear. We’ll finish it another day I promise. For now, shall we pack up the tent and keep exploring? Maybe find another field with more bunnies?”

Angela broke eye contact with him, her cheeks still flushed at his words and his proximity, though she nodded her affirmation. Genji smiled and picked her up in his arms, eliciting a yelp of protest and surprise from her before calming her down with a kiss to her forehead. With that, they went to work, packing up their camp in the depth of Zurich. With no one to disturb them and no one to see them, the two were free to love and make love to their heart’s content and in any way they deemed fit. Whether it was by a small pond or on a bountiful open field of flowers, nothing could come between them and their sincerest love for each other.

And so, their field of love blossomed into a beautiful forest. A forest full of bunnies, birds, and a Bastion. An unending forest that they could never fully express deep inside their heart.

[thedragonaspect]

Favourite writing tip #3 – The main character needs a reason to be in the story

If you are telling a story, it helps to be able to answer what is the story, and why is the main character in the story? Good reasons make for a good story, and a character that takes part in, and drives the story, is (usually) more engaging as a protagonist than a character that the story happens to.

A more meta question is does the character want to be in a story? This question doesn’t have a right or wrong answer, but it’s one I find helpful for figuring out how to tell a story.

The Hunger Games (good story, in my opinion):

What is the story: Girl competes in a brutal contest to protect her sister

Why is Katniss in the story: Because she has to be. No one would save Prim if she wasn’t there

Does Katniss want to be in a story: No, she’s a fairly hostile character, and it takes a strong motivation to keep her in it

Twilight (weaker story*):

What is the story: Girl falls in love with vampire

Why is Bella in the story: So she can fall in love with Edward, and he can fall in love with her

Does Bella want to be in a story: not really, she just wants Edward, and keeps wanting him more or less passively until the plot runs out

Naruto:

What is the story: Outcast boy becomes a ninja to earn recognition

Why is Naruto in the story: The story is about his journey and struggles

Does Naruto want to be in a story: Yes. Naruto is open and talkative, and much more cooperative about being in the spotlight

Now, with my characters: Llathasa/Isayne was a lot of fun to write a story about, because she’s curious, meddlesome, and communicative. Meya, although I love her as a character, is a difficult main character because she’s neither talkative, nor introspective. In that meta sense, she doesn’t want to be in a story, and I haven’t come up with a good enough motivation to force her to be in one.

*About Twilight vs any other love story - under the cut

So, “Character falls in love with other character” could be the plot of any romance, but I think Twilight was more purposeless than some. Bella’s only characteristic for much of the series is her unquestioning devotion to Edward, because he’s pretty and she loves him. Pride and Prejudice is another love story, but it’s not just about how and why Elizabeth and Darcy fall in love, but also the different ways they have to grow up to get there.

Pride and Prejudice

What is the story: Stubborn man and woman manage to fall in love

Why is Elizabeth in the story: The story is about a lot of characters, but Lizzie is the most interesting, effective viewpoint to tell the story from. She is in the same situation of needing to find husbands, or be cast on the mercy of male relatives - but Lizzie is both the most meddlesome, and the most aware of this. So, driving the story falls on her shoulders - her efforts and insight are the story.

Does Elizabeth want to be in a story: Her whole character motivation is that she wants to be in a different story to the one she is afraid that she’s in - she doesn’t want to be a woman forced to marry for the good of her family

[missfinefeather]

GA: These Events Are Inevitable And Regardless Of Whatever Emotional Entanglements Obfuscate Their Significance They Will Ultimately Serve An Important Purpose 

Everyone who plays the game has an excuse from their own guilt for playing the game. I don’t know if that’s the greatest gift the game gives them or the worst curse considering the game put them in this to begin with.

AG: Meddler. Why you so meddley, Miss Meddlesome McFussyfangs???????? GA: Because Youre Dangerous AG: No way! I'm just fine. Why don't you can it. 

I mean, she is dangerous.

GA: And Dangerous People Can Be Really Important GA: Maybe Even The Most Important Sometimes GA: But It Just Means Theres Got To Be Someone Around To Keep An Eye On Them GA: And If Not Me Then Who GA: Everyone Has An Important Job To Do 

Virgo has such a mature head on her! I’m glad I made her my favorite! ^^

I think I mentioned it a long time ago that I actually do know her name already, I’m waiting for the comic to say it before Is say.

Then I can finally show you what I’ve created.

AG: Ok, gr8. Fine! I'm going to check on my lusus now. AG: 8ut I'm starting to think you are full of shit, and I am quite sure she will 8e QU8TE FIN8! GA: Youre Right Anything Can Happen I Guess GA: But Just So You Know Im Sorry For Your Loss In Advance 

“I mean, yeah, anything could happen... I’m right though...“

AG: Man, why d8dn't I just get th8 last w8rd and sign off real qu8ck like I usu8lly do???????? AG: Let you sne8k th8t stink8n' littl8 ninja quip in th8r8. Ah! So m8d. AG: Lousy st8pid godd8mn supportive fri8nd! 

I like that Virgo is the nice friend that drives the mean friend nuts with her kindness and understanding xD

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

... hey, @anastasian-dreamer

Naruto/Scooby-Doo AU has Velma/Anko, Daphne/Fred and Shaggy/Chouza/Chouza's wife (who has no name but I'll use Chiharu as that's the voice actor). Because Shaggy is the guy to eat enough to impress the clan and I can.

It also means that Choji and Naruto are now brothers.

Thoughts?

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[itslulu42]

Oceans

Part Eighteen of Ninja Dorks Flailing at Interpersonal Relations!

I wrote part 17 and 18 together, which is why this update is so fast.  :)

I hope you enjoy metaphors and fluff.

One | Previous

EIGHTEEN

Sakura’s question was the last thing he expected.  He had expected the worst.  Sasuke had left her in the middle of the night.  They found a new threat and she had returned to the village to warn him. She had ended up pregnant and wanted to share the news before she left again.

"Why would you ask that?" Kakashi asked with a calmness he didn’t feel.

Sakura chewed her lip. "I didn't think we were dating when I left, but I’ve had some conversations and now I’m not so sure."

"Like who?" Kakashi asked sharply, thinking of some of the more meddlesome Anbu agents.   He didn’t want to remove Panther from his post, but Kakashi drew the line when it came to Sakura.

"Oh.  Um... like Shishou and Pakkun."  Sakura twisted a napkin in her hand.  

Damn. Pakkun had always been bossy, that's how the pug ended up in charge of the pack despite his size. And Kakashi couldn’t say anything to Tsunade either.

"We weren't dating," Kakashi replied, wishing that he could give her a different response. He didn’t her to feel guilty for something that he hadn’t even been aware of it until it was too late.

"Oh."  She looked down at the napkin in her hand like it was going to bite her.  "I guess... I thought... nevermind."

Kakashi grimaced as the silence extended.  This was the point when he should say something.  He had never been very good with emotional conversations.  He could read people easily enough and he had no problem when it came to ninja affairs.  But when it came down to how he should react, and what he should say, that's where Kakashi often stumbled.  He scrambled for a topic.

"You never explained why you’re back in the village.  What's this about Sasuke?"

Fuck.

Kakashi knew he was prone to self-loathing, but this was ridiculous.  Why was he inquiring in her love life of a girl he had no right to desire?  He did not want to hear about Sasuke.

Sakura looked up at him, her fingers plucking at her shirt sleeves.  “I don’t want to talk about Sasuke.  I wanted to talk about us.  But I think I must have misunderstood.”  Sakura stood to her feet and then gave a small bow.  “Thank you for the tea, but I think I should be going."  Her voice wavered as she spoke and when she rose Kakashi saw tears in her eyes.

Kakashi reached out for Sakura’s wrist as she passed.  She froze in place and he used that moment to collect himself.  He rewound her words in his head; the pieces falling into place as he realized Sakura’s showering choices were intentional.

Kakashi wasn't one for words, but this was one of the few moments that he knew he had to go beyond his comfort zone.  Kakashi had a precious few people in his life and he had lived a lifetime of regret by the time he was twenty.   He refused for Sakura to be one of them when he had a chance to correct it.

Sakura needed to know this was serious for him.

So Kakashi told her the first time Sakura stayed the night, she rolled from her side of the bed until she ended up curled against his side.  He told her how he used the substitution justu with a pillow to extract himself from her embrace.  He told her it happened almost every night, and he used to gently tug her back to her side of the bed in the morning.  He confessed that he hadn’t wanted to embarrass her, and he had been embarrassed because he stole her affection at night.  He told her how it backfired when she left because he had grown used to her presence as he slept.  He spoke of pillows that carried the scent of her shampoo and sealing them in a scroll.

And through it, Kakashi watched Sakura carefully, waiting for her to recoil at his words.  Instead, she took a step closer, her pulse accelerating under his fingertips.  He continued.

Kakashi spoke of preparing meals of one for decades and having that habit shattered in a few weeks. He spoke of leftover fish in a frying pan and feeding the ANBU guard in the hallway.  He spoke of romance novels, failed experiments in poetry, and despondent ninken.  He told her he missed her, how the silence he once found peaceful seemed never-ending.   He told her how wanted her, how he wanted to kiss her, and where he wanted to kiss her.

Kakashi watched her hands, cautious of the fist that might come his way.  He waited for Sakura’s horror, her disgust.  He waited for her to stomp out of the room. He watched her face flush, and her eyes darken, and her mouth part in wonder.  

Kakashi spoke of twisted sheets, of his mouth on her body, the taste of salt on skin.  He spoke of lazy Sunday mornings, of waking up with Sakura’s arm around his waist.  He spoke of her kindness, her valor, his wish for her happiness and how he…

How he…

The words caught in Kakashi’s throat.  He squeezed his eyes shut, frustrated at his inability to say the most important thing.

“You love me.”  Sakura withdrew her hand from his.  “You love me,” she repeated in wonder.

Kakashi made a noise of agreement.  The words fell from Sakura’s lips so easily while his own body strained with the effort.

“Talking about this is hard for you, isn’t it?”  Sakura said as she stroked his hair.  Her fingertips grazed his scalp, causing it to tingle pleasantly.  “It’s okay; you don’t have to say it.  I knew those twelve pillows meant something.”

The lump in Kakashi throat eased enough for Kakashi to laugh lightly.  Sakura withdrew from his space and sat back down in the chair across from him. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she regarded his appearance.  He would have found her gaze uncomfortable if it weren’t for the fondness in her eyes.

“I made a mistake when I left with Sasuke.  Well, maybe not a mistake.  I had to go with him; he’s all I ever wanted.”

“I know,” Kakashi responded. “I figured it out when you were leaving, but I wasn’t going to try to stop you from being happy.”

Sakura bit her lip as Kakashi spoke, his tone devoid of bitterness and resentment.  She only received his support and understanding; the same things which caused a dangerous squeezing in her chest and made her toes curl.  

“I had to go with Sasuke so I could move on from him; I wouldn’t have been able to realize it until I was alone with him.  He doesn’t love me.  Sasuke thinks he loves me; he was trying to have a relationship with me.  But I’m an obligation, the only thing he has left of a family besides Naruto.  And he doesn’t realize that it’s part of the problem.  He sees me as the thirteen-year-old that he left on a bench, the girl that won’t stop loving him.”

Sakura took a moment to think about what she wanted to say next.  Her eyes were dry at least; she had run out of tears for Sasuke during her journey back home.  Kakashi was silent when she spoke, but it didn’t have the same oppressive feel as it did when she was alone with Sasuke.  Kakashi understood that this conversation was something that needed to happen.

“Sasuke brought me into a village full of strangers and tried to marry me without even asking if it’s something I wanted to do.  And all I could think was it was my fault.  I told him I loved him so much that he took it for granted.  I thought I wanted to marry him, but now I know I wanted a relationship.  That’s not something Sasuke knows how to do.

“I couldn’t let myself think about you when I was gone; it wasn’t fair to compare you to Sasuke no matter how much I missed you.  I was too afraid of what it meant; that I was a horrible cruel person who broke up with you because I didn’t realize we were dating.”

“To be fair, I didn’t realize we were dating either.”

Kakashi’s dry comment caused a giggle to rise from her chest, diffusing some of the tension in the air.  

“I’m so relieved this isn’t just me who feels this way.  I really like you and I want more than friendship.  Maybe I love too easily, I don’t know.  I don’t want to make the same mistake with you like I did with Sasuke, to try to force a relationship that doesn’t belong.  How much do I feel is real, and how much is just my heart looking for a way to move on from Sasuke?  I don’t know.  I wish I could tell you.”

Kakashi hummed.  “What are you trying to say?”

“I don’t want to mess this up.  I want to be with you, but maybe we should take it slow.  You’re really important to me and the last thing I want to do is embarrass you.”

“I doubt I could be embarrassed by you, but I see your point.”

“Oh, okay. Good.”  Sakura took in Kakashi’s appearance again.  Despite her attempts to straighten his hair, it was still messy. The urge to sink her hands in his hair as she pulled him close made her fingers twitch.  “Can I have a kiss?”

“I thought you wanted to take it slow?”

Sakura opened her mouth to explain it was important to understand their physical attraction too, but she didn’t have a chance to speak.  Kakashi’s hand shot out to pull at the oversized shirt to tug her forward as he leaned her direction.  She let out a squeak that was promptly swallowed by his mouth, his hands sweeping across her back as he discovered where he wanted to place them.

Sasuke’s kisses had been like the seashore, nibbling at her toes pleasantly before retreating. Kakashi was the whole ocean, his lips a promise that spoke of untold depths and an endless horizon.  Sakura was short of breath, terrified by how easy it was to drown in his touch.  

Fortunately, Sakura could walk on water.  

Sakura forced his hand out from under her shirt and pushed him away.  She raised her hands to her mouth, feeling the smile that had made its way across her lips.  Kakashi’s mask pulled down around his neck allowing her to get a proper view of his face. Even when they had dinner together, she had only caught brief glimpses of it from the corner of her eye.  She couldn’t help but laugh at his dazed expression as she gave him an affectionate swat on his shoulder.

“That is not slow!  Don’t be so greedy.”

“Sorry,” Kakashi apologized, the satisfied smile on his face contradicting his words.  He glanced at the clock.  “It’s pretty late and I still need to get ready for bed.  We should call it a night.”

Sakura stretched, popping her back.  “The bathroom is all yours.  I’m going to bed.”  She was delighted to see Kakashi’s face turn red, his face flushing in a way that made her question who was the pretty one in their relationship.

“Ah.  Uh.”  Kakashi cleared his throat.  “I never got around replacing the pillows.”

“Oh.  Well, I didn’t sleep with all them, so I have a couple of clean ones sealed away.”  Sakura left the room to dig into the bag for the scroll.  Kakashi walked around her to step into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.  

Sakura stepped into the bedroom, freezing when she saw the bed.  She took it all in and then started counting.

One, two, three…

Kakashi had twelve blankets.

Sakura unsealed the scroll and tossed the four pillows she hadn’t used as a mattress on the bed. She had a feeling there was a story behind it, but she would tease him about it later.  For now, she was just happy to be home.

By the time Kakashi entered the bedroom, Sakura was already asleep.

Part Nineteen

[fmdxkit-blog]

versus.

➳ @fmdrocket 

face hidden under the shadows of a black cap, kit scans the list of titles above the ticket kiosk. most of the movies don’t leave a lasting impression, nor call out to him. a few, however, manage to spark a sliver of fascination. the foreigner. as a fan of jackie chan since he was a meddlesome young boy, the new film caught his eyes. the next is the lego ninjago movie. animation. lego. and ninjas? sign kit up. 

then he remembers he’s not alone. the decision isn’t solely based on his. his expression fell, mouth sloping to a frown as he faced haeun. since becoming on friendly enough terms to see movies together, they not once agreed on what to see, eat and even where to sit. the predicament amuses kit. with others, they mesh fluidly. by themselves, not so much. “the foreigner or the lego movie. choose one wisely.” there’s no way he will grant her a say. a choice. they might end up watching–him struggling–through a drama feature.

[dndrandom]

Here are the lists, though a warning that this is 1088 items listed:

Race:

Human

Elf

Dwarf

Gnome

Orc

Dragonborn

Tiefling (Demon Descendent)

Avian (Bird Person)

Centaur

Drow (Dark Elf)

Satyr (Goat People)

Myconid (Mushroom People)

Ent (Tree People)

Lamia (Snake People)

Minotaur

Mer

Warforged

Anubid

Half-Orc

Half-Elf

Owlfolk

Half-Dwarf

Blood Elf

Half-Angel

Shadowborn

Troll

Ogre

Lizardfolk

Fae

Dark Elf

Goblin

Class:

Warrior

Knight

Cavalier

Berserker

Pugilist

Shield-Bearer

Weapon Master

Dragoon

Sentinel

Fencer

Soldier

Samurai

Martial Artist

Monk

Dragon Knight

Dark Knight

Archer

Corsair

Beast Rider

Ronin

Warlord

Herald

Inquisitor

Blade-Singer

Paladin

Marksman

Duelist

Marauder

Raider

Adventurer

Strategist

Diplomat

Templar

Spellsword

Death Knight

Battlemage

Bandit

Gunslinger

Assassin

Ranger

Ninja

Merchant

Bard

Dancer

Arcane Archer

Red Mage

Blue Mage

Cleric

Battle Priest

Cutpurse

Scout

Hunter

Explorer

Beastmaster

Horizon Walker

Strider

Loremaster

Enchanter

Summoner

Psion

Elementalist

Necromancer

Druid

Acolyte

Highwayman

Ballistician

Spy

Poisoner

Trap Master

Dark Delver

Gambler

Mentalist

Tinkerer

Technomancer

Animist

Geomancer

Dreamwalker

Channeler

Sage

Theurge

Warlock

Thief

Infiltrator

Catburglar

Philanderer

Stalker

Chameleon

Trickster

Magician

Shadowmancer

Alchemist

Binder

Conjurer

Illusionlist

Shaman

Seer

Arcanist

Witch

Sorcerer

Wizard

Height:

Shortest

Short

Average

Tall

Tallest

Weight:

Lightest

Light

Average

Heavy

Heaviest

Build:

Scrawniest

Scrawny

Average

Buff

Buffest 

Skin Overtone (Melanin / Metal / Feathers / Etc):

Darkest

Dark

Tan

Light

Lightest

Albinic

Melanistic

Skin Undertone:

Blue Tones

Red Tones

Yellow Tones

Alignment:

Lawful Good

Lawful Neutral

Lawful Evil

Neutral Good

True Neutral

Neutral Evil

Chaotic Good

Chaotic Neutral

Chaotic Evil

Hair / Accents:

Black

Brown

Grey

Blonde

White

Blue

Red

Green 

Hair Type:

Longest Straight

Long Straight

Medium Straight

Short Straight

Shortest Straight

Longest Wavy

Long Wavy

Medium Wavy

Short Wavy

Shortest Wavy

Longest Curly

Long Curly

Medium Curly

Short Curly

Shortest Curly 

Character Trait 1:

Active

Adaptable

Admirable

Adventurous

Agreeable

Alert

Allocentric

Amiable

Anticipative

Appreciative

Articulate

Aspiring

Athletic

Attractive

Balanced

Benevolent

Brilliant

Calm

Capable

Captivating

Caring

Challenging

Charismatic

Charming

Cheerful

Clean

Clear-headed

Clever

Colorful

Companionly

Compassionate

Conciliatory

Confident

Conscientious

Considerate

Contemplative

Cooperative

Courageous

Courteous

Creative

Cultured

Curious

Daring

Debonair

Decent

Decisive

Dedicated

Deep

Dignified

Directed

Disciplined

Discreet

Dramatic

Dutiful

Dynamic

Earnest

Ebullient

Educated

Efficient

Elegant

Eloquent

Empathetic

Energetic

Enthusiastic

Esthetic

Exciting

Extraordinary

Fair

Faithful

Farsighted

Felicific

Firm

Flexible

Focused

Forceful

Forgiving

Forthright

Freethinking

Friendly

Fun-loving

Gallant

Generous

Gentle

Genuine

Good-natured

Gracious

Hardworking

Healthy

Hearty

Helpful

Heroic

High-minded

Honest

Honorable

Humble

Humorous

Idealistic

Imaginative

Impressive

Incisive

Incorruptible

Independent

Individualistic

Innovative

Inoffensive

Insightful

Insouciant

Intelligent

Intuitive

Invulnerable

Kind

Knowledge

Leaderly

Leisurely

Liberal

Logical

Lovable

Loyal

Lyrical

Magnanimous

Many-sided

Mature

Methodical

Meticulous

Moderate

Modest

Multi-leveled

Neat

Nonauthoritarian

Objective

Observant

Open

Optimistic

Orderly

Organized

Original

Painstaking

Passionate

Patient

Patriotic

Peaceful

Perceptive

Perfectionist

Personable

Persuasive

Planful

Playful

Polished

Popular

Practical

Precise

Principled

Profound

Protean

Protective

Providential

Prudent

Punctual

Purposeful

Rational

Realistic

Reflective

Relaxed

Reliable

Resourceful

Respectful

Responsible

Responsive

Reverential

Romantic

Rustic

Sage

Scholarly

Scrupulous

Secure

Selfless

Self-critical

Self-defacing

Self-denying

Self-reliant

Self-sufficient

Sensitive

Sentimental

Seraphic

Serious

Sharing

Shrewd

Simple

Skillful

Sober

Sociable

Solid

Sophisticated

Spontaneous

Sporting

Stable

Steadfast

Steady

Stoic

Strong

Studious

Suave

Subtle

Sweet

Sympathetic

Systematic

Tasteful

Teacherly

Thorough

Tidy

Tolerant

Tractable

Trusting

Uncomplaining

Understanding

Undogmatic

Unfoolable

Upright

Urbane

Venturesome

Vivacious

Warm

Well-bred

Well-read

Well-rounded

Winning

Wise

Witty

Youthful 

Character Trait 2:

Abrasive

Abrupt

Agonizing

Aimless

Airy

Aloof

Amoral

Angry

Anxious

Apathetic

Arbitrary

Argumentative

Arrogant

Artificial

Asocial

Assertive

Astigmatic

Barbaric

Bewildered

Bizarre

Bland

Blunt

Boisterous

Brittle

Brutal

Calculating

Callous

Cantankerous

Careless

Cautious

Charmless

Childish

Clumsy

Coarse

Cold

Complacent

Complaintive

Compulsive

Conceited

Condemnatory

Conformist

Confused

Contemptible

Conventional

Cowardly

Crafty

Crass

Critical

Crude

Cruel

Cynical

Decadent

Deceitful

Delicate

Demanding

Dependent

Desperate

Destructive

Devious

Difficult

Dirty

Disconcerting

Discontented

Discouraging

Discourteous

Dishonest

Disloyal

Disobedient

Disorderly

Disorganized

Disputatious

Disrespectful

Disruptive

Dissolute

Dissonant

Distractible

Disturbing

Dogmatic

Domineering

Dull

Easily Discouraged

Egocentric

Enervated

Envious

Erratic

Escapist

Excitable

Expedient

Extravagant

Extreme

Faithless

False

Fanatical

Fanciful

Fatalistic

Fawning

Fearful

Fickle

Fiery

Fixed

Foolish

Forgetful

Fraudulent

Frightening

Frivolous

Gloomy

Graceless

Grand

Greedy

Grim

Gullible

Hateful

Haughty

Hedonistic

Hesitant

Hidebound

High-handed

Hostile

Ignorant

Imitative

Impatient

Impractical

Imprudent

Impulsive

Inconsiderate

Incurious

Indecisive

Indulgent

Inert

Inhibited

Insecure

Insensitive

Insincere

Insulting

Intolerant

Irascible

Irrational

Irresponsible

Irritable

Lazy

Libidinous

Loquacious

Malicious

Mannered

Mannerless

Mawkish

Mealymouthed

Mechanical

Meddlesome

Melancholic

Meretricious

Messy

Miserable

Misguided

Mistaken

Money-minded

Moody

Morbid

Muddle-headed

Naive

Narcissistic

Narrow-minded

Natty

Negativistic

Neglectful

Nihilistic

Obnoxious

Obsessive

Obvious

Odd

Offhand

One-dimensional

One-sided

Opinionated

Opportunistic

Outrageous

Overimaginative

Paranoid

Passive

Pedantic

Perverse

Petty

Pharissical

Phlegmatic

Plodding

Pompous

Possessive

Power-hungry

Prejudiced

Presumptuous

Pretentious

Prim

Procrastinating

Profligate

Provocative

Pugnacious

Puritanical

Quirky

Reactionary

Reactive

Regimental

Regretful

Repentant

Repressed

Resentful

Ridiculous

Rigid

Ritualistic

Rowdy

Ruined

Sadistic

Sanctimonious

Scheming

Scornful

Secretive

Sedentary

Selfish

Self-indulgent

Shallow

Shortsighted

Shy

Silly

Single-minded

Sloppy

Slow

Sly

Small-thinking

Softheaded

Sordid

Steely

Stiff

Strong-willed

Stupid

Submissive

Superficial

Superstitious

Suspicious

Tactless

Tasteless

Tense

Thoughtless

Timid

Transparent

Treacherous

Trendy

Troublesome

Unappreciative

Uncaring

Uncharitable

Unconvincing

Uncooperative

Uncreative

Uncritical

Unctuous

Undisciplined

Unfriendly

Ungrateful

Unhealthy

Unimaginative

Unimpressive

Unpolished

Unprincipled

Unrealistic

Unreflective

Unreliable

Unrestrained

Unself-critical

Unstable

Vacuous

Vague

Venal

Vindictive

Vulnerable

Weak

Weak-willed

Willful

Wishful

Zany 

Character Trait 3:

Absentminded

Aggressive

Ambitious

Amusing

Artful

Authoritarian

Big-thinking

Breezy

Businesslike

Busy

Casual

Cerebral

Chummy

Circumspect

Competitive

Complex

Confidential

Conservative

Contradictory

Cute

Deceptive

Determined

Dominating

Dreamy

Driving

Droll

Dry

Earthy

Emotional

Enigmatic

Experimental

Familial

Folksy

Formal

Freewheeling

Frugal

Glamorous

Guileless

High-spirited

Huried

Hypnotic

Impassive

Impersonal

Impressionable

Intense

Invisible

Irreligious

Irreverent

Maternal

Mellow

Modern

Moralistic

Mystical

Neutral

Noncommittal

Noncompetitive

Obedient

Old-fashioned

Ordinary

Outspoken

Paternalistic

Physical

Placid

Political

Predictable

Preoccupied

Private

Progressive

Proud

Pure

Questioning

Quiet

Religious

Reserved

Restrained

Retiring

Sarcastic

Self-conscious

Sensual

Skeptical

Smooth

Soft

Solemn

Solitary

Stern

Stoid

Strict

Stubborn

Stylish

Subjective

Surprising

Soft

Tough

Unaggressive

Unambitious

Unceremonious

Unchanging

Undemanding

Unfathomable

Unhurried

Uninhibited

Unpatriotic

Unpredictable

Unsentimental

Whimsical

Gender:

Woman

Man

Nonbinary

Genderless 

Expression:

Masculine

Androgynous

Feminine

Sexuality:

Straight

Gay / Lesbian

Bi

Pan

None

Unspecified 

Eye Colour:

Brown

Hazel

Blue

Green

Red

Amber

Golden

Purple 

Basic Disorders / Diseases*:

Cancer

Cardiovascular Disorder

Connective Tissue Disease

Digestive Disorder

Endocrine Disorder

Hematological Disorder

Immune System Disorder

Musculoskeletal Disorder

Respiratory Disorder

Skin Disorder 

Complex Disorders / Diseases*:

Arthritis

Asthma

Anencephaly

Anophthalmia | Microphthalmia

Anotia | Microtia

Cleft Lip | Cleft Palate

Congenital Heart Defects

Craniosynostosis

Diaphragmatic Hernia

Down Syndrome

Encephalocele

Esophageal Atresia

Gastroschisis

Hypospadias

Microcephaly

Omphalocele

Spina Bifida

Upper and Lower Limb Reduction 

Bladder Cancer

Breast Cancer

Cervical Cancer

Colon Cancer

Endrometrial Cancer

Gallbladder Cancer

Gynecologic Cancer

Head | Neck Cancer

Kidney Cancer

Leukemia

Liver Cancer

Lung Cancer

Lymphoma

Melanoma

Myeloma

Oropharyngeal Cancer

Ovarian Cancer

Prostate Cancer

Rectal Cancer

Skin Cancer

Thyroid Cancer

Uterine Cancer

Vaginal Cancer

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Type 1 Diabetes

Type 2 Diabetes

Epilepsy

Fetal Alchohol Syndrom

Alchohol Related Neurodevelopmental Disorder

Alchohol Related Birth Defects

Heart Disease

HIV

AIDS

HPV

Chronic Kidney Disease

Meningitis

MRSA

MERS 

Physical Disabilities:

Cerebral Palsy

Spina Bifida

Poliomyelitis

Stroke

Head Injury

Spinal Cord Injury

Visual Impairment

Hearing Loss

Blindness

Deafness

Mute

Chronic Illness 

Mental Disabilities / Disorders:

Acute Stress Disorder

Adjustment Disorder

Adolescent Antisocial Behavior

Adult Antisocial Behavior

Agoraphobia

Alcohol Dependence

Alcoholic Hallucinosis

Avoidant / Restrictive Food Intake Disorder

Alzheimer's Disease

Amnestic Disorder

Amphetamine Dependence

Anorexia Nervosa

Anterograde Amnesia

Antisocial Personality Disorder

Attention Deficit Disorder

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

Autism

Autophagia

Avoidant Personality Disorder

Atelophobia

Asperger Syndrome

Barbiturate Dependence

Benzodiazepine Dependence

Bereavement

Bibliomania

Binge Eating Disorder

Bipolar I Disorder

Bipolar II Disorder

Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Borderline Intellectual Functioning

Borderline Personality Disorder

Brief Psychotic Disorder

Bulimia Nervosa

Caffeine-Induced Anxiety Disorder

Caffeine-Induced Sleep Disorder

Cannabis Dependence

Catatonic

Catatonic Schizophrenia

Circadian Rhythm Sleep Disorder

Claustrophobia

Cocaine Dependence

Cognitive Disorder

Communication Disorder

Conduct Disorder

Cotard Delusion

Cyclothymia

Delirium Tremens

Depersonalization Disorder

Derealization

Dermatillomania

Desynchronosis

Developmental Coordination Disorder

Diogenes Syndrome

Dispareunia

Dissociative Identity Disorder

Dyspraxia

Dyslexia

Dysphoria

EDNOS

Ekbom's Syndrome (Delusional Parasitosis)

Encopresis

Epilepsy

Enuresis

Erotomania

Factitious Disorder

Fregoli Delusion

Ganser Syndrome

Generalized Anxiety Disorder

General Adaptation Syndrome

Hallucinogen-related Disorder

Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder

Histrionic Personality Disorder

Huntington's Disease

Hypochondriasis

Hysteria

Insomnia

Intermittent Explosive Disorder

Kleptomania

Korsakoff's Syndrome

Lacunar Amnesia

Major Depressive Disorder

Maladaptive Daydreaming

Malingering

Manic Episode

Mathematics Disorder

Melancholia

Minor Depressive Disorder

Misophonia

Mood Disorder

Munchausen's Syndrome

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Narcolepsy

Neurocysticercosis

Neurodevelopmental Disorder

Nicotine Withdrawal

Night Eating Syndrome

Nightmare Disorder

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD)

Oneirophrenia

Opioid Dependence

Opioid-related Disorder

Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)

Orthorexia (ON)

Pain Disorder

Panic Disorder

Paranoid Personality Disorder

Parasomnia

Parkinson's Disease

Pathological Gambling

Persecutory Delusion

Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS)

Phencyclidine (Or Phencyclidine-Like)-Related Disorder

Phobic Disorder

Pica (Disorder)

Psychosis

Phonological Disorder

Polysubstance-related Disorder

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Primary Hypersomnia

Primary Insomnia

Pseudologia Fantastica

Psychogenic Amnesia

Psychotic Disorder

Pyromania

Reactive Attachment Disorder of Infancy or Early Childhood

Recurrent Brief Depression

Relational Disorder

Residual Schizophrenia

Retrograde Amnesia

Rumination Syndrome

Schizoaffective Disorder

Schizoid Personality Disorder

Schizophrenia

Schizophreniform Disorder

Schizotypal Personality Disorder

Seasonal Affective Disorder

Sedative-, Hypnotic-, or Anxiolytic-Related Disorder

Selective Mutism

Separation Anxiety Disorder

Shared Psychotic Disorder

Sleep Disorder

Seasonal Affective Disorder

Sleep terror Disorder

Sleepwalking Disorder

Sleep Paralysis

Social Anxiety Disorder

Social Phobia

Somatization Disorder

Somatoform Disorder

Specific Phobia

Stereotypic Movement Disorder

Stockholm Syndrome

Stuttering

Substance-Related Disorder

Tardive Dyskinesia

Transient Global Amnesia

Transient Tic Disorder

Trichotillomania 

Amputations:

Left Leg

Left Arm

Left Eye

Right Leg

Right Arm

Right Eye

Right Ear

Left Ear

Left Foot

Right Foot

Left Hand

Right Hand 

Other Diseases:

Viral Pnemonia

Vampirism

Typhus Fever

Typhoid Fever

Syphilis

Scabies

Tuberculosis

Plague

Mycetoma

Meningitis

Melioidosis

Measels

Malaria

Lycanthropy

Influenza

Herpes

Hepatitis

Epidemic Typhus 

*Basic as in less specific, Complex as in more specific. **These may not be perfectly categorized or labelled, I'm going off of the CDC website mostly. If you want to roll multiple times, feel free-- if you want to only use some of them, feel free. If any of these need to be removed, relabelled, or recategorized, please message me privately.

[isolavirtuosa]

Post-Post Traumatic: 10 Years Later, Happily Ever After 7-8

Post-Post Traumatic [fanfiction] NaruSasu (in progress)

A series of “drabbles” following the events of Post Traumatic.

Previous Parts

10 Years Later, Happily Ever After

Parts 1-2

Parts 3-4

Parts 5-6

Parts 7-8 under the cut

- 7 -

             We all stood around Getsuko’s unconscious body, waiting.

           “Do you think it’ll hold?” Sakura finally ventured.

           “If it doesn’t, we’re fucked,” Kurotsuchi commented.

           “Thank you for your invaluable input, Tsuchikage,” Q said.

           Everyone stared at him.  A had finally stepped down as the raikage, and Kumogakure had put a young unknown in his place.  It was like having your bratty kid brother tag along everywhere, or so Itachi would probably say.

           “When does she wake up?” Hanabi asked, crouching down beside Getsuko and smoothing her white hair from her eyes.

           “Probably days,” Sakura said.  “Or months. Or hours.”

           “You guys are really nailing it today,” Q said.

           I blew the smoke from my cigarette in his direction.

           He coughed and glared at me.

           I shrugged.

           Naruto elbowed me, but looked amused.  Then the look drained from his eyes as they refocused on Getsuko.

           “We’ll take her to a secure facility,” Kakashi said softly from where he was sitting at the edge of the crowd.

           I looked at him.  “You will not seal her eyes.”

           “As long as it’s not necessary.”

           “You will not seal her eyes,” I repeated, a growl rumbling up my throat.

           Naruto took my hand and cradled it to his chest.

           Kakashi gave me a sad smile.  “It’s interesting how you’ve changed.”

           “How the hell have I changed?” I asked petulantly.  Kakashi still made me feel like a child.

           “Let’s go, Hanabi,” he said.

           Hanabi moved to pick up Getsuko.

           “That girl is a citizen of the Land of Lightning and you’re not taking her anywhere,” Q said.

           The other kages had expressions with varying degrees of annoyance.

           Sakura groaned, dropping her head in her hands.  “We already decided-” she started.

           “No, you decided,” Q said.  “The Konoha alliance, always doing whatever Naruto says.”

           “I didn’t say anything,” Naruto said, his voice calm, but the red glow around his body giving away his anger.

           “Everything always has to revolve around Konoha like it’s the center of the world, and it’s not,” Q said.  “She’s ours, and you have no right to take her.”

           “Your country abused her,” Naruto spat out.

           I caught his arm and pulled him back.  “Let’s go.”

           He turned to me, confusion muddling his anger.

           “We’ve done everything we came here to do,” I said.  “Kaguya is sealed inside Getsuko, and there isn’t anything else for us to do.”

           “But-” he tried to protest.

           “Leave it to them,” I said, pulling his arm sharply.

           He could have resisted, but he let me pull him.  “Sasuke, we can’t just-”

           “Listen to your girlfriend, Naruto,” Q said.

           “I will eviscerate you,” I hissed, my hands already forming a jutsu.

           Naruto pulled me back this time, murmuring soothing nonsense.

           B, who had been silent the whole time, stepped beside Q.

           Hanabi cradled Getsuko protectively in her arms.

           “Leave it to them,” I said, embarrassed that I’d let that little upstart get to me.  Seriously fuck him, though.  Naruto’s girlfriend.  I was projecting an air of calm, but anger was thrumming through me.

           Naruto surprised me by suddenly doing the Advanced Flying Thunder God Technique, transporting us back home.

           “You listened to me,” I said, trying not to sound shocked.

           “I don’t know if it was the right thing to do,” Naruto said slowly. “Should I go back?”

           “No.”

           “Sasuke…”

           “The world needs to learn how to survive without you.  If it can’t, then oh well.”

           “Did you really just ‘oh well’ the end of the world?”

           “You’re going to die eventually, you know.”

           “Oh. My.  God.”

           “I just want you to stop inflating your self-importance.”

           “You are the worst husband in the world.  Like in the actual world.”

           “Good.”

           “What the hell do you mean, ‘good’?!”

           “You’re back,” Jugo said from the doorway.

           “We are,” I agreed.

           “Sasuke wants me to die!” Naruto exclaimed, gesturing wildly.

           “I didn’t say that I wanted it, I said that you were going to.”

           Jugo’s brow furrowed.  “Did something go wrong with the seal?”

           “Huh?” Naruto said.  “No, that was fine.  Probably. We left after it was done.”

           “So it’s over?”

           “As long as Kaguya doesn’t break out of the seal,” I said.  I sat down on the bed abruptly, feeling my leg buckle.

           “Hey,” Naruto said, sitting next to me and pulling my right leg up across his lap. “Does it still hurt?  And don’t say it’s fine.”

           “It’s not bad.”

           “That isn’t funny, jerk,” he complained, pushing my bloody pant leg up and rubbing over the ashy gash on my leg with his chakra.  “Why didn’t you tell me it was this deep?”

           “We had other things to worry about,” I said, trying not flinch as the bone started to reset itself.

           “Should I go slower?”

           “No.”

           Naruto went slower anyway, trying to make it hurt less.

           “Did you get a boo-boo?” Mikio asked, appearing out of nowhere and peering at my leg.

           “Yeah,” I said.

           “It must hurt a lot,” he said.  He climbed up onto the bed and hugged my waist.

           “Naruto’s making it better,” I said, resting my hand on the top of his head.

           “I’ll give you my hug power.”

           “Thank you.”  I wasn’t even being ironic when I said it.  I had become the kind of person who appreciated hug power.  It was awful.

           One kid quickly turned into two, and then the whole brood was crowded into our room.

           And then the night went on like we hadn’t just fought an epic battle to save the world.

           I smoked my after-dinner cigarette outside with Jugo, talking business.  The brats ran around like zoo animals, Naruto in the thick of it, disturbing the desert quiet.

           “Is everything really okay?” Jugo finally asked.

           “As okay as things will ever be,” I said.

           “How was Getsuko?”

           “Unconscious.”

           “But she’ll be okay?”

           “She should be,” I said.  “The seal that Hanabi created… she’s not bad.”

           “You could say that she’s good.”

           “I could.”

           Jugo shook his head.

           “She would make a suitable hokage,” I offered.

           “Is Getsuko staying with her?”

           “I think so.”

           “It would be nice if Getsuko came and visited once she’s recovered.”

           I shrugged.

           “I think the kids would like that.  And I would, too.  We all care about her.”

           “Yeah, I got it.”

           “You care about her, too.”

           “What’s your point?”

           “Sasuke, your act is getting a little tired.”

           “Fuck you.”

           Jugo shrugged.

           “I don’t have an act,” I muttered.

           He snorted.

           “Did you just snort at me?”

           Jugo smiled.

           I bumped shoulders with him.

           He surprised me by pulling my head to rest on his shoulder.  “Stop being so reckless.”

           I cast my eyes up at him.

           “You’re always coming home hurt…”

           “Because I’m the only one with the balls to fight a little girl.”

           “Only you would call the most powerful ninja in existence a little girl.”

           “What is going on here?!” Naruto demanded, glaring at us.

           “I’m stealing Sasuke from you,” Jugo deadpanned.

           I smirked.

           “How could you?!” Naruto mock-cried, throwing his arms around my waist.

           His nonsense was immediately ended by a pig-pile of children.

           I limped a little as I went up the stairs to bed.

           “Let me see,” Naruto said, pawing at my pajama pants.

           “This is the worst seduction you’ve ever tried.”

           He leveled me with a look.

           I lifted my hips and slid the pants down very slowly.

           Naruto looked away and swallowed.

           “Pervert,” I said.

           “You’re the one putting on a show!”

           I stretched my leg out to him.

           He rubbed it, pushing some healing chakra into it.  “I don’t have a lot left,” he said apologetically.

           “It doesn’t hurt much now,” I said.  “It’ll heal on its own fine.”

           “I don’t want you to hurt at all.”

           “You are so cheesy.”

           “How is that cheesy?!”

           “Hey, you’re using too much chakra,” I said, pushing his hand away.  “I’m okay.  I’m not just saying it, I am.”

           “Okay,” he said, leaning in to kiss me.  “I know you’re really strong and not fragile at all, but I just worry irrationally.”

           “You are certainly irrational,” I agreed.

           “You’ve been so feisty since you went off your meds,” he said, getting into bed.

           “And your masochistic ass loves it,” I said, deciding not to take offense at the word ‘feisty’.

           “God help me, it does,” he sighed into his pillow.  “You’re so smart and quick and clever.”

           “Yes,” I agreed.

           “And so easy to seduce with compliments.”

           “Like you ever even try to seduce me.”

           “Your cracks on our sex life are starting to hurt me.”

           “Everything I do hurts you,” I muttered, rolling over and spooning him. “You know how I feel about you.”

           “Yeah, it’d just be nice if you said it once in a while.”

           “Gross.”

           “You are so mean.”

           “I know.”

           “If you know the problem, then correct the behavior!”

           “Don’t wanna.”

           “You are too cute sometimes,” Naruto said, cradling my arm to his chest.

           “’M not cute,” I murmured, sleepily nipping at the back of his neck.

           Naruto turned over, pressing his forehead to mine.  “Whatever the word is then.  You make my insides go all fluttery.”

           “You are so gay.”

           “Uh, duh.”

           “I’m glad you’re gay,” I hummed.  “I thought you were straight for so long.”

           “I thought so, too,” he said with a little laugh.  “But who wouldn’t go gay for Uchiha Sasuke?”

           “I know I would,” I said, half asleep.

           Naruto’s laugh rumbled through his chest.

           In the morning, he promised me that he was retiring.

           “I can be a stay-at-home dad,” he said, and he looked happy about it, happier than he’d ever looked about being the hokage.

           “You don’t actually live with your children,” I pointed out.

           He looked at me aghast.  “Don’t let our kids hear you say that.”

           I rolled my eyes.

           “But hey, so Kurotsuchi was telling me about this boy from their village. He’s a chuunin, has a strong affinity with wind.  She said he’s looking for a teacher…”

           “You’re a good teacher,” I said, kissing his temple and leaving it at that.

           It took time.

           Naruto kept running back to Konoha to hover over Getsuko’s shoulder.  When he accepted that the seal was working and that she wanted him to stop stalking her, he decided to hover over Hanabi’s shoulder while she started preparing to take his place.  She pretty much chased him out of Konoha.

           “She told me that I’m meddlesome,” he complained.  “And a micromanager.  I don’t even know what that means!”

           “You’re stepping down next month,” I said.  “Maybe you should try, you know, stepping a little farther away.”

           “But they need me!”

           “I need you.  These kids need you.  Konoha doesn’t give a fuck about you.”

           “Why do you have to be so damn cynical?” he complained.

           I stared at him.

           Naruto sighed, running his fingers through my hair.  “If you’re gonna keep growing it, you should put it in a ponytail.”

           I raised an eyebrow.

           “It’d be hot.”

           I raised the other eyebrow.

           He grinned at me goofily.

           I rolled my eyes.

           “Hey,” he said, his grin getting wider.

           “What?”

           “Guess who’s coming to my retirement-slash-Hanabi’s-coronation?”

           “Should I care?” I asked dismissively.

           “It’s you, stupid,” he said, brows knotting in irritation.

           “Oh, okay then, let me just cross the border and watch all the ANBU try and subdue me.”

           He grabbed me by the hair, enough to feel it but not enough to really hurt.

           My breath sped up a little.

           “I am telling you that the Counsel is going to overturn your exile,” he said, face close to mine.

           “That’s not possible,” I said.  Kakashi had told me as much.

           “All things are possible when Naruto is the hokage.”

           “You’ve been the hokage for ten fucking years and you haven’t been able to get the Counsel to budge.”

           “Why are you being such a jerk today?”

           “I wasn’t aware that making honest statements made me a jerk.”

           “Sasuke,” he whined.

           I took a breath and let it out.  I could feel his fingers pressing into the back of my neck, and I wished he’d pull harder.

           “You’re having weird masochistic thoughts,” he said.

           “So?”

           He kissed my nose, letting go of my hair.  “You better start packing for Konoha.”

           “It’s not for a month,” I said.  “And who says I even want to go?”

           “Yurina and Tsubaki,” he said, walking away.

           Of course I went.

 - 8 -

             Our entire family was there to watch Naruto pass that fashion faux pas of a hat over to Hanabi.

           “And now Naruto-sensei will stay awake in the bath?” Mikio asked from my shoulders.

           “Probably,” I said, watching as Hanabi turned from the crowd to say something to Sakura, the words ‘Shadow Hokage’ emblazoned on her back with no number. She’d be leaving the village soon, protecting Konoha from the outside like Naruto had done.

           Like Itachi had done.

           “This is really boring,” Ao complained.  “How many more speeches are they going to do?”

           “Like a million,” Suigetsu groaned.  “Can we sneak out?”

           “I’m all for it,” I said.  Despite being allowed into the village, I hadn’t exactly receive a warm welcome. Same old Konoha, full of glares and hostility.  Ditching their most important ceremony seemed to send the right kind of ‘fuck you’ message that I wanted to send.

           “Won’t Naruto-sensei be mad?” Sanma asked, looking between us all nervously.

           “He probably made a clone so he wouldn’t have to stand through these dumb speeches either,” Ao said.

           As soon as she said it, I narrowed my eyes at the Naruto standing on stage. “No, it’s really him,” I confirmed.

           “But you thought it might not be,” Ao said with a laugh.

           “I can’t deny that,” I said, eyeing a way through the crowd.  “Come on.”

           Sanma seemed conflicted.

           “I’m staying,” Jugo said, resting a hand on Sanma’s shoulder.

           I gave him a nod, and led the rest of the group out of the crowd.

           Of course we were stared at the whole way, but it felt so nice to be out of there.

           “God, I hate this stupid village,” I muttered.

           “Then how come you wanted to come so badly?” Mari needled me.

           I thought of my poor, poor nieces, who were trapped on the stage with their moms and dad, forced to be the good hokage kids.  This whole ceremony was a waste of my time, and I wished it was over.

           “I need a cigarette,” I said.

           “Gross,” Mikio said, pinching my cheeks.

           I couldn’t even be mad at him.  I really and truly had gone soft.  If the me at sixteen could only see me now.

           We really knew nothing as kids.

           I decided to scare the people of Konoha instead.  Most were at the ceremony, but I stared down the few passersby that we saw as we moved into the town.  They stared at the ground nervously, walking as far away from me as the width of the street allowed.

           All the shops were closed.

           “I hafta pee,” Riki said.

           “I want cotton candy!” Kanon declared.

           “Cotton candy!” the twins agreed.

           This was almost as annoying as the ceremony.

           Then Suigetsu strangely came to the rescue, getting Riki an alley to pee in and distracting the others with a game of tag spread out across the empty town.

           “When did Suigetsu get good with kids?” I asked Karin.

           “I think he’s practicing,” she said, staring out into the town from the stoop we were sitting on.

           “For wha-” I started to say, then recoiled.  “Are you serious?”

           “I’m knocked up,” she said, touching her stomach.

           “Congratulations?”

           “Yeah, I don’t really know how I feel about it either.”

           “Aren’t you kind of old to have a bab-” I tried to say and got kicked in the head.  “Bitch.”

           “The only bitch I see here is you.”

           “Fuck,” I said.

           “Fuck,” she agreed.

           “Go away so I can smoke.”

           “Maybe I’ll just follow you everywhere you go.”

           “Did Naruto put you up to this?” I asked suspiciously.  “Did you get pregnant just to stop me from smoking?”

           “That seems more likely than the reality of the situation,” she said with a sigh.

           “You’re really keeping it?”

           She touched her stomach again, leaving her hand there as she looked down at it.  “It’s weird, but I feel kind of attached to the little mutant.”

           The ceremony ended, and Konoha slowly came back to life.

           Naruto was mad that we’d left, while also weirdly elated by his newfound freedom.

           “Sakura’s having a party,” he said, suddenly swooping me into a kind of waltz in the middle of the hotel lobby.  “Let’s go, okay?”

           “When did you learn how to dance?” I asked suspiciously.

           “I have lots of hidden talents.”

           I used my sharingan to follow him.  “No, I have lots of hidden talents.  You need a pat on the back and a sticker for every little thing that you accomplish.”

           “You make me sound really needy,” he complained, dipping me.

           I glared at him.

           He grinned, pulling me back up.  “Yurina’s taking a dance class and I was her practice partner this week.”

           That sounded adorable, and I needed to see it in person so I could take hundreds of photos and hoard them under my pillow.

           “You look like you just thought something horrible,” Naruto said, bringing our waltzing to an end and poking my nose.

           “I did,” I said, shaking my head.  “Why does my mind go to such horrific places?”

           “Did you really think something awful, or were you thinking about how cute Yurina and I must’ve been dancing together?”

           “Are we going to this stupid party or what?”

           “Yeah, where are our kids?”

           “Playing with Suigetsu,” I said, gesturing vaguely.

           Naruto gave me a confused look.

           “Yeah, he’s suddenly decided that he likes children.  Don’t ask, you don’t want to know.”

           Naruto made some clones and sent them off in different directions while we headed towards Sakura’s.

           We walked how we often walked around Suna, fingertips laced and shoulders brushing.

           Konoha wasn’t Suna.

           Of course, no one dared say anything.  Even if Naruto had just finished retiring an hour earlier, he was still their beloved hokage.

           But they didn’t need to say anything.  The obvious disgust, the averted eyes, the constant whispering while eyes darted towards us and quickly away.

           “Why am I here?” I muttered, taking my hand from Naruto’s.

           He snatched my hand back.

           I frowned at him.

           He frowned back.  “Come on,” he said, pulling me along forcefully.

           I glared death at the next idiot who made a face at us.

           He stopped walking and just stared at me like a terrified animal.

           I smiled, and that set him running off.

           “Don’t terrify my citizens,” Naruto said, pulling my hand up and kissing the knuckles.

           “Fuck them,” I replied.

           “Let’s just get to the party, okay?”

           I hated being in Konoha.  It made me feel weak and cornered.  It also brought up unwanted memories of my family.

           “We should go to your parents’ graves,” Naruto said, reading my mind like usual.

           “Yeah,” I said quietly.

           “We can go to mine, too,” he added.  “I think they’d like to see you.”

           “Dead people can’t see things, dumbass.”

           “Don’t be an asshole just because you’re stressed.”

           “Sorry.”

           He squeezed my hand, accepting my apology.

           “Sasuke-senseeeei!” Mikio cried, attaching himself to my leg.

           “What?” I asked, picking him up and sitting him on my shoulders again.  It made it easier to walk.

           “We had so much fun with Suigetsu,” he said happily.

           “With Suigetsu?” Naruto asked, confused.

           “Yeah!” Kanon said, holding her arms up to Naruto.

           He picked her up and put her on his shoulders.

           “Whatta ‘bout me?” Riki complained.

           “I’ve got ya, kid,” Suigetsu said, scooping him up.

           Riki cheered.

           “When did you become the child whisperer?” Naruto asked.

           “I’m great with kids,” Suigetsu said.

           We arrived at the hall, and the kids scampered off to play with the other kids at the party.

           “Is it okay if I drink?” Naruto requested, eyes lingering on the beer being passed around.

           “Yeah, as long as you stay away from Gaara,” I said, casting my eyes towards the kazekage.

           “Aw, come on, we’re not that bad,” he complained.

           “You and Gaara drinking together is the most annoying thing I have ever experienced in my life,” Temari said as she and Shikamaru came in with their son.

           “I feel like you’re exaggerating,” Naruto protested.

           I took a beer from the waiter and handed it to him.  “No shenanigans.”

           “Yeah, yeah, yeah…”

           Of course there were shenanigans.  Fortunately, Sakura put a stop to their plot to fill everyone’s drinks with exploding streamers.

           I sat as far away as possible and smoked my cigarettes, telling anyone who wanted to know that we were getting a divorce in the very near future.

           “Stop telling people that you’re going to divorce me!” Naruto yelled as Shikamaru dragged him over to me.

           “I gave you one task, Naruto.  One fucking task.”

           He went all penitent.  “I’m sorry, baby,” he said, climbing in my lap and throwing his arms around my neck.

           “I’m not taking responsibility for him,” I informed Shikamaru, who was trying to walk away.

           “He’s not my problem anymore,” he said with a shrug.

           “Dammit, Nara!” I growled as he disappeared back into the party.

           Karin snorted.  She and I had just formed a little alliance of non-drinkers in the corner, but apparently she was no longer to be trusted.

           “Go get him some water,” I said to her.

           “Get it yourself.”

           “With this 200 pound tumor?” I said, gesturing towards the man attached to my body.

           “You’re a big strong man, I’m sure you can handle it.”

           “I need a cigarette,” I muttered.

           Karin pointed to her stomach.

           Naruto looked between us, confused.

           “She got knocked up,” I said.

           Naruto detached himself from me to go over to Karin, wrapping her in a hug. “Can I touch it?” he pleaded.

           “It’s still the size of a peanut,” she said, but let him touch her stomach anyway.

           Naruto looked so happy.  “Hey, little cousin,” he said into her stomach.  He and Karin had been able to figure out that Naruto’s mom and Karin’s dad had been first cousins, making them second cousins.  Since neither of them had any actual family, it seemed to please both of them to finally have someone.  “Are you gonna get married?”

           “Heck no,” Karin said.

           “Why not?” Naruto asked.  “Marriage is great!”

           “What’s so great about it?”

           “Tax breaks!”

           Karin snorted.  “Is that why you married Sasuke?”

           “Uh, obviously.”

           I went to get Naruto some water and smoke a cigarette.

           “Sasuke.”

           I stared at the fifth hokage, eyebrow raised.

           “Come have a drink with us,” she said, gesturing towards where Kakashi, Shizune, and a masked ANBU were sitting.

           “You realize I’m a recovering alcoholic?”

           “Who isn’t?” she said, sitting back down and pouring herself more sake.

           I considered walking back to Naruto and Karin, but I wasn’t one to run away from something.

           Kakashi passed me some tea.

           I lit a cigarette, taking a drag before taking a sip.

           Kakashi was looking at me in sad, paternal kind of way.

           I’d once thought of him like a father, but that had been several lifetimes ago, and now we barely spoke.

           “I don’t want anything to happen to you while you’re in the village,” Tsunade finally said.

           I stared at her.

           “Kakashi told you that you still have enemies here.”

           I shrugged.  “I have enemies everywhere.”

           “They’re not happy that you’ve been allowed back,” she said.

           “And just who is this mysterious ‘they’?” I asked, tired of the games.

           “Several members of the elected council,” she said.  “Mostly people from old clans, bearing a grudge against the Uchiha.”

           “Did you have a detailed listing for me?” I asked.  This whole conversation was boring.

           “These are credible threats on your life, Sasuke,” Kakashi said.  “We’re afraid they’ll go after your family to get to you.”

           “I will slit the throat of anyone who tries.”

           Kakashi shook his head.  “You’re too cocky, sometimes.  You and Naruto haven’t had any peers for a long time, but now there’s Getsuko.  Who knows what other powers are going to start emerging? You’re not untouchable, and you need to realize the risk that puts everyone around you at.”

           “Thanks for your concern,” I said, finishing off my tea.  “If you don’t have anything useful to actually say…?”

           “There’s a faction forming against Naruto,” Tsunade said, eyes boring in me.

           “The Ninja Freedom Alliance,” I said.

           “They’ve been making overtures to the old families here in Konoha.”

           That I hadn’t known.  “Are we supposed to be afraid of them?” I asked, trying to play it off.

           “Yes,” the both of them said, faces serious.

           “We will always fight for the two of you,” Kakashi said.

           “Like how you fought so hard to take those damn seals off of my eyes?  Like you fought so hard to let me back into the village?” I asked, bitterness creeping into my voice.

           “Yes,” he said, his voice breaking.

           “Just like how he fought for those things every damn chance he had, just like how he stood up against everyone who spoke out against you,” Tsunade put in. “You don’t know a damn thing about how this village operates.  You have no clue how hard this man has fought for you and protected you.  The only reason you are alive today is because of him.”

           I looked away, watching my cigarette burn its way towards my finger.

           “Good evening, young Uchiha!” Gai said cheerfully as he rolled up to our table. He continued smiling, oblivious to the tension.

           “We’re done, right?” I said, standing up.

           Kakashi was giving me that look again.  “Be careful,” was all he said.

           I went back to Naruto and Karin, plunking a water between Naruto’s hands.

           “But I don’t wanna mess up my buzz,” he complained, putting the water down and pulling me onto his lap.

           I stared at him.

           “I miss drunk Sasuke.”

           I stared at him harder.

           “I do.”

           “You’re the one who made me go to rehab!” I snapped.

           “Well, yeah, ’cause you could never just stop, you know,” he said, rubbing one of his hands up and down my side. “But when you’d only had a coupla drinks, when the night was still young…  You were so damn cute. All open and vulnerable and honest.”

           “Good thing you put a stop to that shit.”

           “I regret it.”

           Karin was giving him an incredulous look.

           “Come on, you loved drunk Sasuke, too.”

           “Drink your water,” she said, pushing the glass towards him.

           Naruto sighed and took a drink.

           “Oh, hey, Ino!” Karin said, standing up as the other woman walked by.

           Ino turned and waited for Karin to join her, then the two walked off together.

           “We’re really unpopular,” Naruto said glumly.

           “Then maybe you shouldn’t try putting things that explode in people’s drinks.”

           “It seemed like a good idea at the time!  It woulda been hilarious!  Even Gaara thought so!”

           “So help me god if I see you two drinking together even once for the rest of this trip.”

           “I’m sorry,” Naruto murmured into my ear.  He let his hands slide down my back and settle in for a grope.  “Hey, so Sakura and Ino said that all the kids could stay at Hokage Tower for a little sleepover.”

           “Do they realize how many children we have?”

           “They even invited Shika’s kid, and Chouji’s, and Kiba’n’Hina’s.”

           “That doesn’t seem chaotic or insane at all.”

           “Mm,” Naruto said, giving me a spank.

           “What the hell?!” I said, pulling away and sitting on my own chair.

           “You are wearing something very naughty right now,” he said, his eyes squinted in a grin.

           I flushed.

           His grin widened.  “It’s getting late.  We should get back to the hotel,” he said, reaching out and rubbing my thigh.

           “You are so damn handsy when you’re drunk,” I muttered.

           “Yeah,” he agreed happily, pulling me to my feet.  “Let’s go.”

           So we went.

[ecoamerica]

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