#mental health monday

[freesia-writes]

Lil Life Update for Y'all <3

I've been a lil cryptic or back-n-forth, I think, and just wanted to share a little bit about what's been going on. I say it's not for attention but who knows what motives lurk under there, LOL. It's mostly because I love you all and want to let you in, also hope that it's encouraging or connective for anyone else who's experienced the same, and also I just miss the community I have sooooo loved here. 🥹

I'm a 34yo female with 2 kids aged 4 and 7. I had depression like crazy during and after my second pregnancy especially. In Aug 2021, my primary doc suggested I try something like Zoloft since I'd been complaining of irritability, no capacity, constant worry, and other anxiety symptoms. When I did feel some relief and felt encouraged that I could "feel like myself" again, I pursued solutions for other issues I was noticing. Over the last year and a half, it's been quite a ride. ADHD symptoms led to Adderall for 4 days, then Wellbutrin for a few months, then Buspar for a few months, then Strattera (tapering up and then back down) for about 3 months, then Ritalin for 1 month, which I thought was helping until we realized that the entire month of October was basically an increasingly manic episode.

Whew.

We're talkin 2007 Britney here (ok I didn't shave it but I cut my hair off into a pixie). Spent thousands on a new wardrobe of the "dark academia" style. Bought Disneyland tickets. Invested in a photography mentorship. So much energy and inspiration. Then we realized it was getting out of hand.

I had also been tapering off a lot of the meds over the last two months, so it was just a crazy cocktail of chemicals that made my brain finally go kaput. I finished the last dose of Zoloft on November 5th, and that was the last of the meds, so now I'm off everything. My therapist thought the mania was medication-induced due to all the changes plus the addition of the stimulant, so the goal was to try to allow everything to settle down and see what "baseline" is for me right now.

And it has been frickin HARD.

Cervical vertigo. All-or-nothing sleep and appetite. Extreme sensory sensitivity. Random itchiness. Racing mind. Total inability to focus. And the worst part has been the mood swings.

I'm basically having all the symptoms of bipolar disorder in a rapid-cycle format. It may be cyclothymia, or it may be the withdrawal effects from all the meds, but regardless... It's been quite the roller coaster. The nerd in me has been fascinated by the experiential knowledge of it all, since I majored in Psychology and have always loved learning about it, but the overall negative effects on me and my family have been difficult.

I'm someone who has always relied completely on being highly capable and in control. I find my worth in my productivity and competence. And it has caused increasing stress throughout my life. I've been praying for years that God would break me of it, and I can see how he is using this to do precisely that -- lovingly trying to answer my request to be freed of this relentless pursuit of the illusion of control. He's inviting me to simple, joyful life of trust. The perspective shift is so freeing when I realize that I don't need to have it all figured out because he already does, and I can just rest in his loving guidance and look to him for the next step instead of trying to plan out every possible outcome and strategy. I went on a reflective retreat in the Santa Cruz mountains and just felt so encouraged and loved in the way he invited me to let my shoulders down and to ground myself in his warm provision and care.

But the change doesn't happen overnight.

So in the middle of a total storm of bipolar symptoms -- days of mania followed by days of depressive episodes and being so new at it all that I don't know how to navigate "normal life" with all of that -- I'm also trying to rewire 34 years' worth of the way I think and act. BUT it's a blessedly simple process: the only thing I have to worry about is this moment. I can't affect the future or the past. So all I have is right now, and I can turn to God for guidance, encouragement, insight, or anything I need in this moment, and he is so faithful to give it. But man, it's easy to forget. ;)

Literally me with that right now, trying to figure it all out on my own before I remember I can't and don't need to:

Anyway, this got LONG, surprise surprise, but I've always enjoyed being vulnerable for the sake of connection and potential encouragement. And selfishly, I'd LOVE to hear from any of you who may have had similar experiences. Right now the fixation of my [very limited] capacity is on my photography business, but I've been feeling drawn to writing more and more, and have attempted a lil drabble here and there. So I'm just patiently waiting for the inspiration to return. :)

I have so appreciated the love from you all. I also haven't been as active with reading/reblogging/supporting/etc as I was, and that's just where I'm at right now, but please know that my heart is with you even if my brain is not, LOL.

If you made it this far, you get a gold star. Or a Howzer hug. Or somethin. :)

[redd956]

Announcement! Whump Community!

@theres-whump-in-that-nebula and I (@redd956) are currently working on and starting a mental health positivity blog, which on Mondays will post mental health advice, positivity, and more.

After the events which many of us in the whump community are familiar with that occurred a little over a month ago, we discussed whether there was something we could do about the situation. A lot of ideas were thrown about, and eventually we decided on this.

The mental health in the community obviously hasn't been the same. As we are a community already consisting of many of those turning to whump writing as a coping mechanism it would make sense either way to provide a potential resource containing mental health positivity.

Plenty of other outside sources are also straining the mental health of about everyone around the world.

I wouldn't normally interrupt the whump community with something non-whumpy, but I strongly feel this is related to our community, and want to open this blog to those who may need.

I also open this blog to anyone who stumbles across it, needs it, follows me for separate communities, and everyone. This blog is easily for everyone. Mental Health Monday is open to everyone.

The blog itself will post and reblog positive mental health related materials on Mondays, and potentially there are ideas of doing a few occasional types of post throughout the week.

If you are in love with this idea, and interested in it, feel free to reblog so others may note it's sudden existence. @theres-whump-in-that-nebula and I (@redd956) will do our best to keep it active, and clean with helpful content.

[givemetherapyimawritingtravesty]

Sometimes the day's goal is just survival. The barest of minimums.

Sip a beverage. One sip of a liquid , doesn't have to be water. Eat one morsel of food, doesn't matter if it's a piece of candy.

Maybe change your boxers or shirt. Even if it's swapping the old pajamas for fresh ones.

Stand up and stretch your back. Then you can go right back to being horizontal.

Swap blankets or flick the same one over the bed giving the appearance of a bed you just climbed into it and haven't been in all day.

Whatever you gotta do to make it until you can sleep again (even if you just slept for 11 straight hours).

Edit: AND TAKE YOUR FUCKIN MEDS. Even if it's hours late. Take. Them.

[mental-health-monday]

Self Care Thing To Do #1

Eat that food the doctor recommended for your health

[ladylucksrogue]

I absolutely struggle with some of these. I struggle asking for help, saying no sometimes, mostly in work related contexts, and accepting compliments. I have been making a conscious effort to work on them. The struggle is real, but keeping an open mind and recognizing that even if it doesn't work this time, that it might in the future is important. Sometimes it is a process.

Things that absolutely work are letting yourself feel and express emotions, they are all valid, even the negative ones. It's ok to be angry, frustrated, just as joy and amusement are ok.

I absolutely write and watch funny movies. But sometimes a good cry is cathartic. Sometimes I'll put a sad movie on or read something sad, or moving, because I need to be able to get those emotions out.

Smiling, even in the mirror for about 30 seconds can absolutely boost your mood. Is it silly? Sure but it works. Also smiling at people at the store, on the train, wherever can help others too, we tend to mirror what we are given.

New experiences are great too, because they help boost your mood, give you some much needed dopamine. So whether it is a new location, a new sport, a new hobby or just escaping with a new book, it's always good to change things up a bit.

[princess-honeysuckle]

January 30, 2023 - Self Care Day

Don't be afraid to allow yourself to zone out sometimes. It is ok to pause when you need to!

[yesloulou]

.

[btgcoach]

Rise and shine, everyone! ☀️ Let's talk about removing obstacles! 🌟

Take a moment to reflect: What things do you allow to hinder you? Whether it's self-doubt, negative relationships, or limiting beliefs, identifying these obstacles is the first step towards overcoming them.

Let's support each other in clearing the path to success! 💪✨

[psychicpizzacat]

Sometimes when I spiral into a panic attack, the only thing that can help is my 4hr long playlist of cats purring 💜🐱✨

[cobwebtru]

Current position: hidden under covers. Dogs in attendance at least until that motherf*%$ing squirrel shows his head again.

[dangerousstarlightcreator]

I would miss you

[eirian-houpe]

Mental Health Monday.

For the 'touchy feely' people out there:

[givemetherapyimawritingtravesty]

Clothes causing sensory issues? Take them off.

Invest in ONE (6) blanket(s) of a Safe Texture to wrap yourself in.

[mental-health-monday]

If you are a minor and an adult in your life is constantly venting on you, asking you for advice on adult matters, or draining you of resources: You are not helping them; they are traumatizing you.

Get out of the situation if you can; or if you cannot, talk to your school counselor. The adult in question is engaging in inappropriate behavior. You are a child; not a therapist, a marriage counselor, or their personal checking account.

[ladylucksrogue]

I wanted to post something yesterday, because Mental Health Monday and all…but yeah, as it is, life got in the way. Specifically, I just kind of fell asleep on the couch as soon as I got home. Oh well, happens to the best of us, or the worst of us?

See what happened there? I wrote a paragraph that is both positive as well as a little self-deprecating, like bordering on negative?

Even as a psychologist, I catch myself lobbing negative thoughts at myself. It’s partially my sense of humor, but part of it is that, like everyone else, I critique myself constantly. Why is it that we do that?

There can be a lot of answers, and no answer will be the same for everyone. It can be force of habit, it can be due to life experiences, or it can be a sign of something deeper, like depression or anxiety or a handy mix of both. A bit of negativity doesn’t have to be a bad thing, as long as it stays within the confines of just a little bit.

When negativity becomes a pattern, it can get out of hand. Today, we are going to talk about a specific kind of pattern that I have seen a lot of lately, and what we can do about it.

Catastrophizing is when we start letting the negative thoughts spiral, when we start predicting all the worst case scenarios, despite there being little evidence that shows us something absolutely terrible is going to happen.

For example: I just lost my job, now I’m going to lose everything.

I failed a test, I am a loser, I’ll never get anywhere.

I suck so bad at this, I’ll never get my license.

These are the “simple cases”. Some people take it way further, creating doomsday scenarios that are cinema worthy. I am never one to critique creativity, but sometimes, it just isn’t that dramatic.

Am I being dismissive of someone’s fears? No. In order stop someone from catastrophizing, or even to stop yourself, sometimes you need a reality check.

Case in point, I was watching the news. I won’t go into specifics, but something very real world triggered something that I thought buried by me, and well, I’m sitting there listening to some expert talk about the situation and ramped up, going on a rant about the worst case scenario. My husband basically told me to breath, that there wasn’t anything I can do about it anyway. It’s not my problem, not anymore and I can’t save the world. And he’s right. What he did, whether he knew it or not, was to stop my spiral in its tracks.

This is important, we can all learn to do this. We all know ourselves pretty well. When we start to realize that a situation is getting critical, when we are feeling that turmoil, that spiral of negativity, we can take a step back. Breath. Find somewhere to sit, grab a coffee/tea/choice of beverage. Focus on the present, focus on the cup in your hands, the birds chirping, whatever.

Break down the situation, right now, as it is happening. It is easy to focus on the negative. We don’t catastrophize about positive things. But just focus on the facts. Facts are good, facts let us work.

Come up with a plan. What can we do in this very moment? Can we do anything at all? Do we need to wait it out? If we do need to wait it out, can we focus on something else so that we don’t get sucked back into that spiral?

Sometimes it helps to look at things from a different perspective, to imagine you are someone else looking in. If you have someone you trust to help you, talk to them about it, the more perspectives you have, the more you realize, things are not as clear cut as you thought.

Sometimes, especially in situations like exams or big events, it helps to positively visualize your end goal. How you get there is irrelevant. You want that license or diploma. Visualize it hanging on your wall, in your hands, you walking the stage. Then if/when you fail a test, you still have that vision in mind. It might be another obstacle in your way but your end goal is the same.

And finally, self care. Self care is important. Focus on you. If you need to take a break, take one. If you need time for yourself, take it. Take a nap, a spa day, a vacation day. Even if you have zero time, find five minutes. Get yourself that latte that you wanted, eat a cookie, something. Take time for yourself, no one else is going to give it to you. And you do not have to justify it to anyone. It is your time. You choose how to use it.

Find people you trust and confide in them. Sometimes the simple act of talking to someone who cares is really important. It lets us decompress and move forward. You know how pressure builds up in a boiler or how when you shake a soda? All that built up pressure has to go somewhere. When you talk to someone, it’s like letting that pressure out…

A little helpful trick I like to use is to find joy no matter what. It can be small. We all have bad days, bad weeks, bad months, etc. Find something, anything that brings you joy. Nothing is too small. Take a minute to look at the flowers on the side of the road, a butterfly, a bird. Let yourself enjoy that moment. The coffee you picked up from that new café is really good? Take a moment to savor that. Little things go a long way to improve your overall well being.

Do you all have any psychology questions or have topics you want me to discuss, let me know 😊 I've wanted to do something like this for a while. I contemplated doing a video, and maybe I will in the future. I just worry I'll come across too boring, like some professor. For now I'll just post here. Stay safe everyone!