#michael in the bathroom parody

[musical-chick-13]

As promised, I present: My Official Propaganda™ for the @cringefaillosersummit finals, "Kobeni in a Hotel"--a parody of "Michael in the Bathroom."

Vote Kobeni here for clear skin, watered crops, and serotonin!

(Lyrics under the cut.)

I am stuck in this hotel room, with a devil roaming out in the hall. I know it feeds on fear, but I'll just stay right here, And not even try to chill out at all.

I got knocked out by my teammate, 'cause I panic-drank from a toilet bowl And I'd rather just scream than act constructively Toward accomplishing our actual goal.

Don't ask if I'm fine. I never once have been okay. And now my anxious mind is wrecking everybody's day.

And I'm just Kobeni in a hotel, Kobeni in a hotel on a mission. ...I think my friend's a spy. Kobeni in a hotel, Kobeni in a hotel on a mission. We're prob'ly gonna die.

But an offer gets made for a rare reprieve: Give the devil Denji, and he'll let us leave. It's just Denji, who we don't know. But my team shuts that down, so I'll cry on this hotel floor by myself. All by myself

I'm just minding my own business, when the blood fiend tries to kill me for fun. Tell me what I did to deserve this kid Ending my life before it's even begun.

Once I'm safe, my mentor splits off from the group to go explore. (She tells us "play nice.") And my feelings sink, 'cause it makes me think If she leaves, there's no one left to keep me safe anymore.

I'll just be...Kobeni in a hotel on a mission. God, I hate this job. Kobeni in a hotel, Kobeni in a hotel on a mission. I can't choke back my sobs.

I'll wait as long as I need 'til my face is dry, But all I've ever known how to do is cry. I'm just Kobeni who you don't know, Kobeni singing solo, Kobeni in a hotel by herself.

Sweat, sweat, sweat, sweat; I can't calm down, I don't know how. Sob, sob, sob, sob; I'm fully breaking down right now. Shriek, shriek, shriek; remember what that devil said: Screech, screech, screech; We'll get set free if Denji's dead. Charge, charge, charge; I'm gonna knife him in the face. Stab, stab, stab; I'd kill to get out of this place.

NO, WAIT, STOP! Someone steps in to tank my knife Because he values Denji's life. That guy now bleeds out on the floor. No one can think straight anymore.

(spoken)……What, no, t-this isn’t my fault!

And I can't help but yearn for a different life. I use my knife as a mirror, and the present is clear 'Cause there's no denying I'm just... Kobeni failing...on a mission. Is there a sight more bleak? Kobeni in a hotel on a mission. This is a heinous week.

I wish my parents weren't the worst Wish my team weren't bizarre. I wish I hadn't lost a poll to my fucking car!! I'm just Kobeni the coward, Life spiraling downward. A paranoid accuser, She's such a cringefail loser! Just a girl you don't know, Trying to sing a solo, Stuck in this hotel room by herself. All by herself. All by herself.

All you know about me is this song. Next time, please don't make me come along.

[shyjusticewarrior]

*to the tune of Michael In The Bathroom*

Edward in the bathroom,

Edward in the bathroom with a piss kink 🎶

[gabriel-shutterson]

Hello TMA community 🧍‍♀️

I know it’s been done before, but I wrote my own take on Michael in the Hallways (the Michael I’m the Bathroom parody). Um, enjoy ^-^

Michael In The Hallways (A Michael in the Bathroom parody)

I am walking through these hallways

Smashing mirrors and opening doors

And when I think I’m done, there’s another one

And for that one, there’s, like, ten thousand more

I was sent into these hallways

Think the archivist shoulda come instead

But that is alright

Because she’s old, and might

Fall and slip and hit her head

Yet I feel a pain forming in my mind

Am I going insane? God, I hope I’m fine

And I’m just

Michael in the hallways

Michael in the hallways of Sannikov Land

I take another turn

I’m just Michael in the hallways

Michael in the hallways of Sannikov Land

I feel my stomach churn

This map makes no sense, and I think I’m lost

But I’m doing my best for my good old boss

I’m just Michael from the archives

Michael who just might die

Michael in the hallways by himself

All by himself

All the years I’ve worked for Gertrude

I’ve never questioned why or what or how

And I guess it’s this place that I have to face the secrets that they’ve hidden ‘till now

I guess it’s all clear, why all I ever did was make them tea

And bring them their files

But I can just scoff, cuz it pisses me off

I joined to learn why all these damn doors follow me

Now it’s just

Michael in the hallways

Michael in the hallways of Sannikov Land

I find another door

Michael in the hallways

Michael in the hallways of Sannikov Land

What am I doing this for?

I really should be mad that I was kept in the dark

But I guess they were scared that I’d lose my spark

I’m just Michael from the archives

Michael who just might die

Michael in the hallways by himself

Slam, slam, slam, slam

I close a door again

Slam, slam, slam, slam

…why did this map come to an end?

Slam, slam, slam, slam

I see a figure round a bend

Slam, slam, slam, slam

I doubt that it is a friend

Smash, smash, smash, smash

I break a mirror then I run

Crash, crash, crash, crash

I trip and know I’m done

Step, step, step, step

The figure walks up to me

And right then I can see

This thing took Ryan, way back when

But this awful thing just takes my hand

And then it disappears, and something happens to me

My hands start to grow, and I think that I know

That Michael’s no longer who I’ll be

I’m

…in the Spiral

I must have a new form

Mmmmmm

Distortion in the hallways of the Spiral

Feels good to be reborn

I know that my job is to make people mad

So what if the cost’s one of Magnus’s lads?

I’m just one of 14 Fears

Titled Es Mentiras

Neither real nor fake

Sounds just like a headache

Just let some kid die

No longer part of the archives

Distortion in the hallways, right at home

I feel right at home

I feel right at home

I’m sure that Michael Shelley is a name

Now his face is the one that I’ve claimed

[pariskim]

no longer mad this episode was late. i wish it never came out. why did they do the entire song. the first note hit and i 

[inevitablemoment]

Lily Tully in the Bathroom by Herself

Okay, so, I don't know if I've actually talked about Lily, one of my Ghostbusters OCs.

So, in the Cathleen Lives AU, Lily Tully is the daughter of Janine Melnitz and Louis Tully. She's born not too long after the couple follows Egon, Cathleen, and their daughters to Summerville, and grows up as one of Marie's (Egon and Cathleen's youngest daughter born at the end of GB2 in this AU) only friends.

When the OG Ghostbusters reconcile and the Spenglers return to New York, Lily struggles to find her place among the slowly-reassembling family, especially as Ray and Willow's eldest daughter, Addison, isn't too keen on letting the Spenglers back into her family's lives. It all comes to a head at their first Thanksgiving dinner together in a long time at Winston and Tiyah's penthouse, as will be depicted in a later fic that I've had the idea for quite a while, but I'm going to wait until the new movie comes out to fully plan out.

Lyrics are below; if you want a voice reference, her FC is Mariah Rose Faith Casillas from Team StarKid (just picture her look as Melissa from the Hatchetfield series).

LILY: I am hanging in the bathroom In the Zeddemore penthouse hall I could stay right here or disappear, And nobody'd even notice at all

Just a comms major in the bathroom 'Cause the Spenglers went and left me alone So I'd rather fake pee than eat awkwardly And watch the Macy's Parade on my own

Everything felt fine when I was half of a pair Now through no fault of mine, there's no other half there

Now I'm just Lily in the bathroom Lily in the bathroom on Thanksgiving Shrinking so I'm not seen Just Lily in the bathroom, Lily in the bathroom on Thanksgiving All thanks to Auntie Cathleen I'm waiting it out 'til it's time to leave And picking at grout as I softly grieve

I'm just Lily who you don't know Lily flyin' solo Lily in the bathroom by herself All by herself

I am hiding, but they're out there, rediscovering this cool history Memories found but erased, and I'll get replaced With some newer, smarter versions of me

And I hear my dad singing acapella through the door "Who ya gonna call?" And my feelings sink, 'Cause it makes me think Now the girls and I can't make fun of our dads anymore

Now I'm just Lily in the bathroom Lily in the bathroom on Thanksgiving Ma says to face my fears Lily in the bathroom, Lily in the bathroom on Thanksgiving But I can't help the tears I'll wait as long as I need, 'til my face is dry Or I'll blame Kelly's weed, or Aunt Willow's burnt pie

I'm just Lily who you don't know Lily flyin' solo Lily in the bathroom by herself

LILY & KELLY: Knock, knock, knock, knock

KELLY: Hey, I need to use the bathroom

LILY & KELLY: Knock, knock, knock, knock

LILY: Of course, yeah, I'll be out soon

LILY & KELLY: Knock, knock, knock, knock

LILY: It sucks, they left me all alone

LILY & KELLY: Knock, knock, knock, knock

LILY: Here in this family drama zone

LILY & ENSEMBLE: Clang, clang, clang, clang!

LILY: I feel the pressure creepin' in

LILY & ENSEMBLE: Bang, bang, bang, bang!

LILY: I should've stayed at Hampton Inn

LILY & ENSEMBLE: Splash, splash, splash, splash!

LILY: I throw some water in my face And I am in a better place I go to open up the door But I can't hear knocking anymore

And I can't help but yearn for the good old times And then I look in the mirror And the present is clearer And there's no denying, I'm just

Lily in the bathroom, Lily in the bathroom On Thanksgiving My trauma, I'll downplay Lily in the bathroom, Lily in the bathroom on Thanksgiving Still not my worst holiday

I wished I stayed home in bed, 'cause I'm a worthless cog And my claim to fame is that my dad was once a dog!

I'm just Lily, Taylor Swift fan Latecoming Hugh Dancy stan Won't stay in the background Must forge my own path now Lily flyin' solo Who you'll say that you know Lily in the bathroom by herself All by herself All by herself!

All you know about me is my name Lovely dinner, I'm so glad I came

[red-might-be-dead]

I am reeling from the full Michael in the bathroom parody wow

right after all that too….

[bizlybebo]

oh what the FUCK. michael in the bathroom parody right off the bat i cannot do this

[fizzyorange-v2]

yeah you put all of my thoughts about david and william's relationship into that one post they're so tragic... i cant help but think of a different timeline where they could have been awkward brothers together, maybe one where they didn't both come from deadwood. the foreshadowing on william's part too, where in the Michael in the Bathroom parody intro from ep 32 (of all places) william sings "he's always such a bummer, he wants to trust his brother" in referring to himself. Also, the implication that everyone who comes from deadwood is messed up makes me wonder how william's parents are. maybe it has to do with the hallway of fears all the way from season 1, where william's mirror showed his father behind him with messed up eyes?

/ pd ep 33 spoilers referenced beware

Maybe in a totally different universe they could’ve had an awkward and strained but mostly healthy and normal sibling relationship. but god knows with who David is in this universe (a morally corrupt ceo) any version of William that allows himself to get close with and trust his step brother is a version that is either equally morally corrupt, very manipulated or both, and no matter what it wouldn’t be a healthy dynamic. (and that’s not really a compliant on my part, i adore fucked up and messy relationships in media lol).

Totally agree that the Michael In The Bathroom cover gave us probably one of the clearest looks into William’s psyche during this whole thing. William really did go that far because he wanted to trust his brother, and he knew if he backed out then he could lose that potential sibling relationship forever. But obviously once he realised he’d actually KILLED someone for it… the betrayal and horror overpowered that old yearning.

William’s parents have always been a source of interest to me because like… William has never said anything outwardly negative about them, but then his actions and demeanour around them always portray something slightly different. I do believe he loves and cares for his parents. But I also think the relationship there has always been kind of strained. My guess is, on top of the general David was the big shot success story William could never live up to, William was always quite distant with his family. He could always see the supernatural (something that even then made him somewhat a freak from this weird but still rural seemingly conservative leaning town) and he spent most of his time out with friends on hunts that I doubt he ever told his parents the truth of before he actually died.

His parents are canonically church goers, it would make sense that William wouldn’t want to tell them he was messing around with devilish stuff, nor that he himself was possessed in some way and able to see the dead. But then he dies, and his freakishness goes from 1 to 100 and there’s no way he can hide it now, especially not if his parents are shown his dead, lifeless body before he wakes back up in it. And maybe his parents saw this as a miracle at first, rather than the work of the devil, but either way we know from the recent rolled that William truly believes his parents see him as some freak, and I’d definitely guess the other towns people if they knew… maybe it wasn’t great for the family reputation wise in such a small town.

And there is something to the fact that, well, in the end when the monsters came for William they did just give him away to the heroes. And sure, they stayed in touch somewhat? But even then it’s one or two calls in months to years of time to your teenaged kid (though I’ll retract that if it’s implied that it was William dodging their calls… but even that leads to a point I’ll make in a bit).

But then whenever they do come back,,, even after everything they don’t seem to take William seriously. Which is very interesting. They’re often worried about him, but they don’t seem to listen to him as we saw in their recent scene where his mum got mad and had to be really persuaded to leave. They don’t seem to comprehend the severity.

They don’t understand what’s going on with him, they don’t have a clue, and I don’t think they ever really did. I think William has always been too afraid to tell them the truth about what’s going on with him (whether that was being able to see the dead, or now all the hero villain mess he’s stuck in), he’s always been afraid of them seeing him like a freak, them no longer loving him. And so he keeps it a secret and he keeps it away from them and he distances himself the best he can. He’d probably argue that it’s to keep them safe, but I think he’s mostly protecting his own heartbreak of them finding out “who he really is” and rejecting him. I think that’s his big fear, and it’s a fear he’s carried around with him since even before his first death.

So while I don’t think his parents are,,, necessarily malicious. I think they’ve definitely fucked up with William. I don’t think they ever made him feel safe enough to be himself around them. I don’t think they’ve ever been there for William when he really needed. And I don’t think they’ve ever known who their son was. But then they still act like they know best for him, they still play the concerned parents. And I think they genuinely believe they do know and want what’s best for William. But the issue there is… they don’t know who William is, and they haven’t for a really long time.

David left too, y’know? He also got the hell out deadwood as soon as he could. He also talked to (and bonded with) William over their clear joint disliking of that place. And I wonder if his parents are oblivious to how much their kids hated where they grew up, if they’re just oblivious to all of the weirdness of deadwood. Why they chose to live and stay there in the first place. They still live there to this day!

I don’t know,,, I have a lot of thoughts about the wisp-bell family and all the mess and dysfunction there. I didn’t even really get into the religious trauma of it all, which is likely a strong part of why William felt the need to hide and distance himself from his parents,,, but yeah I’ll stop rambling for now lol

[obitv]

VYNCENT SOL MICHAEL IN THE BATHROOM PARODY????

[frauggiethecreature]

Frauggie, top ten songs rn

marshaa thank you for the dialectics but i really have to go, the original im gonna win by rob cantor, i/me/myself will wood, 30/90 or whatever its called from andrew garfield, the jrwi prime defenders parody of michael in the bathroom, sophomore slump by scary marlowe except its also actually made by real people irl, rocks rock by henry oak except as above stated, THATS ONLY SEVEN? uhhh bo burnahm channel 5 news, cee lo ill be around ft timbaland

also impostor syndrome by sydney gish and one week by the barenaked ladies and a vague blue haired girl broke my heart when i was 16 by mute frank

[magpigment]

BRO A MICHAEL IN THE BATHROOM PARODY??? IS THAT REALLY NECESSARY THIS IS SO UPSETTING

[unanimoustwins]

i cant believe these mfers dropped the most morally fucky n agonizing shit n then introd the next ep w a michael in the bathroom parody i hate these mfers

[musical-chick-13]

WHAT IF I WROTE A PARODY OF “MICHAEL IN THE BATHROOM” BUT IT’S ABOUT KOBENI BEING STUCK IN THE HOTEL

[charlieconwayy]

Please talk about Macaulay and Paris's relationship

this made my night better because this is my favorite topic

the important thing to note prior to getting into anything, is that mack's paternal instincts have always been a major part of who he is. natasha lyonne called him "the patriarch to his beautiful siblings" (fuck you kit) just last week. the major reason that mack took back his finances was so he could give his mother the money to keep her apartment and help raise the kids. when the apartment burned down (eye roll), mack and his then wife took in the kids. obviously the major reason mack has been even more reclusive than normal in recent years is bc of the birth of his children. it has always been his dream to be a good father and have a happy family.

mack's relationship with mj is obviously a crucial part of the backstory. he has described their friendship of not being necessarily a father/son one, but one of two equals. what is incredibly important about that distinction is that for mack, having a father only meant manipulation and abuse. mj treating him like an equal and giving him a safe space to be a child was a major refuge for mack, especially when he was being treated and being told he was nothing but a cash cow. obviously, as mack has said, mj resonated with mack's super stardom and controlling father. it was largely the reason their friendship began, and while we don't know a ton of details about their relationship after like 1992, it is evident how important it remained to mj until the end and how important it remains to mack today.

mack was made prince and paris's godfather when he was 17-18, while an elderly liz taylor was made the godmother. of all the people in mj's life, siblings, family, friends, etc, mack was entrusted with this honor, which says SO much about mj's view of him and trust in him (we don't know much about his relationship with prince, as prince largely strays away from the spotlight). in his auto biographical parody book (that's rly not a parody and is just a comedic retelling), prince and paris are mentioned in the dedications (on the list of people he hates, joe jackson is listed which always makes me smile) and he tells a story about hanging out at toy stores late at night w a pop star and his children. there's video footage of mack at one of their birthday parties and obviously the famous photo of the three of them watching michael on stage.

we know that after the '05 running into each other in the bathroom during the trial, mack and mj didn't see each other again, but remained in touch with the occasional phone call. mack has praised mj for his dedication to his children during that time, and attended his funeral in '09.

obviously, mack is known for being reclusive and once she got her modeling contract, paris became a very public and open figure. over those years, we got glimpses into their relationship. they have matching tattoos (mack's only tattoo) of spoons, which is an inside joke that they have. paris has spent holidays with mack, particularly one thanksgiving spent in paris with him and brenda. one of the most notable moments was paris introducing her then-girlfriend cara to mack and brenda.

when asked about paris in his interview with marc maron, mack stated: "i am close with paris. i'm going to warn you now, i'm very protective of her, so just look out. i am a very open book when it comes to things, but with her, she is beloved by me."

while paris often posts about mack, mack never does the same about paris. even when speaking ab mj, he doesn't mention paris sans this one time. i believe the reason for this is because mack knew how mj tried to shield his children from the vulturous media, and wants to respect that. i also think a major component to why mack is the perfect godparent for paris is that mj did everything he could to protect mack, and mack wants to extend the same to paris.

paris is constantly critized for not talking about her father enough, and she should be allowed to keep their relationship private if she so chooses. something that is so important to remember is that mj passed when paris was a very little girl. perhaps this is why she finds solace in mack - he got to grow up with mj, while she was never given that luxury.

seeing her attend his walk of fame ceremony was incredibly emotional and touching. i was surprised that she came bc mack is so intensely private about their relationship, but their love and support for each other (always attending events for the other privately is a mainstay for them) is so evident and i know it meant so much to him to have her there.

as paris put it at the ceremony, it's more than a friendship, it's family.

[peppermintfeather]

I was listening to "Michael in the Bathroom" from Be More Chill, and I realized that this loneliness and this helplessness can easily be applied to Reki, scared for Langa to compete against Adam and feeling like Langa has overshadowed him in the first place

-

I am hanging at the S track at the biggest tournament in years I could stay right here or disappear, doesn’t matter, I can’t see through my tears

I’m a creeper at the S track cause my buddy decided that he’d race Well if that’s what he wants, all those crazy stunts, I guess it looks like I am being replaced

Everything felt fine When I was half of a pair What skater needs to shine Where there is snow in the air?

Now I'm just Reki at the S track, Reki at the S track feeling sorry Forget how long it’s been I'm just Reki at the S track, Reki at the S track feeling sorry Fine, go race Adam

I'm waiting it out til it's time to leave And maybe without me, you’ll finally get reprieve I'm just Reki who you don't know Reki flying solo Reki at the S track by himself

I am hiding, but he's out there Just ignoring all our history Memories get erased and I got replaced With a newer cooler version of me

And I hear the fangirls Yell along to Cherry and to Joe  With, you know, whatever it is that they say With all that sound, you don’t need me around I’m not good enough, I have nothing more to show

Now it's just Reki at the S track Reki at the S track feeling sorry I’m not having fun Reki at the S track, Reki at the S track feeling sorry The age of Snow’s begun

It was fun to hang around But my reign’s run dry Who needs someone on the ground When someone new can fly! I'm just Reki who you don't know Reki flying solo Reki at the S track by himself

3, 2, 1, go They’re gonna start the match soon 3, 2, 1, go I guess I’d better dash soon 3, 2, 1, go It sucks he left me here alone 3, 2, 1, go Looks like he’s getting in the zone

Clang, clang, clang, clang I feel the pressure blowing up Bang, bang, bang, bang My big mistake was showing up

Go, go, go go I hand in my S badge No, keep it, there’s no catch I exit through the gated door I’m not having fun anymore

And I can't help but yearn For a different time And then I look at you, Langa And I’m wanted no longer And there's no denying, I'm just

At the S track Is there a sadder sight than Reki at the S track, Reki at the S track feeling sorry This is a heinous night

I wish I stayed at home in bed Forget it all, blank slate Or even better yet I wish I never learned to skate

I'm just Reki who's forgotten Who never should have got in Oh boo hoo it’s so tough I’m no longer good enough Reki flying solo Who you thought that you know Reki at the S track by himself All by himself All by himself

If ‘The One Who Isn’t Langa’ is my name Awesome contest, I'm so glad I came

[guckies]

Nothing is more scary than slime singing a parody of michael in the bathroom