#motherfucker I KNOW this shit is adhd related

[catboybiologist]

It is another late night where I have yet another amount of work to do before the next day and am still on Tumblr anyways

[uncannyoceanz]

day 6.draw one of the Crp clowns/jesters! + Headcanons! (Candy Pop)

He is 7’2

Loves eating candy.

Will have psychotic sugar rushes sometimes and then pass tf out.

Yk he has that man spread ass sit bro💀💀

Honestly really childish 

Long ass tongue…

Ayo what can that tongue do 🤨😏

Def likes Jason in that way.

Bisexual…AND BIPOLAR!!!!

ADHD. 

Likes to annoy, scare, and piss people off for fun.

Careless, reckless, ruthless and sadistic. 

Masochist?

Prankster + jokester 

Kind of narcissistic / over confident.

Kinda hard to offend/anger.

Doesn’t like people seeing him in his night terror form.

100% horny 80% of the time.

He doesn’t really care about gender. If he can fuck he will fuck.

Whore. absolute fucking slut. Cock slut. Loves pussy. Loves cock. Sluttiest thot in this motherfucking bitch. Cunty thotty slutty whore.💀💀💀💀💀 (I can’t take myself seriously bro)

Doesn’t wear make-up. That’s legit js his face.

Sharp ahh teeth like boy-

Waaaaayyyyy too over protective of his sister, Candy Cane.

One of the best bff’s you could ever have, Nathan is Lucky.

Ofc his bestie is Nathan, it’s literally Canon!!!!<3

Kinda gets jealous easily? Mostly when he doesn’t get attention or gets attention absolutely stolen from him.

Loves to be the center of attention 

He uses black magic, dark magic, demonic magic, voodoo, witchcraft, whatever cursed/dark magic you can think of, he does it or has done it.

List of things he loves: #3. Jason. #2. His sister. #1. His hair!!!!

He loves his hair more than anything, a bitch even think about touching his hair he will backhand them so motherfucking hard they forget how to speak.

He doesn’t really like judge angels. Why? Because most things related to a fucking angel, he hates. He has never really met her though so….He just always judges a book by its cover honestly. 

Him and LJ fight a lot, but they can get along together sometimes.

His father figure? Oh hell yeah, y’all know it’s Papa Grande. Fuck slenderman, ain’t nobody like that old bitch.

Upside down crosses everywhere. <3

He likes bright colors.

Jason will have this man in a corset sometimes like holy shit???!

He’s a mini fashionista and also Jason’s model/inspiration sometimes.

Coming in contact (touch) with some holy objects or angels will cause him 3rd degree burns😘🩷  and he just doesn’t really like holy water, but it won’t burn him.

Bibles and some holy shit makes him weaker, but in a more painful way. Which usually makes this man screech in pain<3333 I’m such a sadist 🥰😇

He doesn’t like angels or people in most religions 

He likes to play dress up/other games with sally, sometimes LJ and Jason will join too! 

Whenever playing Alice in wonderland with Sally, he’s the Cheshire Cat.

He’s a top obvi!!!

he can enter and exit through mirrors as he pleases. 

He can teleport

He/They/it

Likes to hang around the pasta kids because they lure in unsuspecting worried adults (aka free prey for Candy ;))

Candy, Pop, Poppy, Night, Poppyseed, C.pop, whore, Hatsune Miku, Raspberry fairy demon, Hatsune Miku demon jester, fairy princess jester demon, Slut, bestie, clown, raspberry, creepy blue clown bitch, night terror, night terrors, cluster demon, the collector, emperor of the dark, dark emperor, the dark omen, demon from the abyss, abyss demon.

He can steal other people’s powers, supernatural strength and speed, he can jump high, adapt to his environment quickly, really good sharp senses, enhanced visuality, and can phase through walls (ghosting)

Manipulation, teleportation, dark architect, power gifting, mind control, mastermind, nightmare manipulation, shapeshifting, magic (mentioned b4), levitation, invisibility, soul absorption

[redstrewn]

Hey have you ever read about The Dark Triad (Machiavellianism + Narcissism + and sub-clinical Psychopathy)? I like reading about psychology a lot and I suddenly remembered the Dark Triad while thinking about Leander... Especially Machiavellianism. (just some food for brainrot hehe)

I have not before and now I am and BRO…..WHY IS IT SO REAL

Gahd DAYM shit is intense. NICE GUY ACT IS BULLSHIT CHECKING OUT RN

UH OHHHHH

Man 😭😭😭 He got that charming boy buff

This sum rich ppl shit. Reminds me of my non-optional career success class that was Business Major Type Beat 💀💀💀💀

He do got that frat boy thing going on

In a meta-analysis of dark triad and workplace outcomes, Jonason and colleagues (2012) found that each of the dark triad traits were related to manipulation in the workplace, but each via unique mechanisms. Specifically, Machiavellianism was related with the use of excessive charm in manipulation, narcissism was related with the use of physical appearance, and psychopathy was related with physical threats.

UHH OHHHHH

All three dark triad traits lead to knowledge sabotage.

I am dead. Information is currency 🤪🤪🤪🤪

The people who tend to be higher in these traits will be in relationship types such as "One-night stand, which is when you have sexual relations with the person only once", "hookups", "friends with benefits, which is when there is a relationship with a friend but do not define the relationship as a romantic one", "booty calls, solicitation from a non-long-term relationship for the intent of sexual relations".

It keeps adding up....

more risk-taking in the form of substance abuse, a tendency to prefer immediate but smaller amounts of money over delayed but larger amounts of money, limited self-control and greater incidence of ADHD symptoms, and a pragmatic and game-playing romance style.

My adhd hc is thriving on this 🧐 (as someone who thought i had it since bp-ii has a lot of similarities) AND NAWT THE GAME PLAYING ROMANCE STYLE HELPPP He's tryna reverse dating sim us 😭 Hes stacking up charm points out of us

Several academic studies have found evidence that people with dark triad personalities are judged as slightly better-looking than average on first sight. Two studies have determined that this is because people with dark triad traits put more effort into their appearance, and the difference in attractiveness disappears when "dressed down" with bland clothing and without makeup.

Real pretty boy moment

Now me looking into machiavellianism...

IM FUCKING SHAKING WHY IS THIS HOW I SEE HIM REAL 💀💀💀💀 I KNOW his flower means sympathy but this motherfucker...why is he being so MANIPULATIVE ABOUT SHIT AUSGEJDIFKFKGF. Paternalistic deception type beat. I know best for you type beat. Screaaamsss.

He has that pack of one track-minded seeming bloodhounds...a hivemind in probably a more metaphorical sense than Ais's literal groupmind, but he is looooonely about it that I wouldn't past him that he uses the group more than he actually like...melts with them. Idfk how to word this. He doesn't get close despite his popularity for a reason.

Yeah....man.

The environmental causes (such as shared, and non-shared environment) that contribute to the development of machiavellianism were childhood maltreatment and neglect, social reinforcement of manipulative behaviors from an early age, and poor family functioning. One study even stated that "the etiology of Machiavellianism, similarly to the development of a dismissing-avoidant pattern, partly originates from childhood experiences obtained in relationships with unexpressive, less understanding, highly punitive or restrictive caregivers".

AAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PARENT ISSUES CRYING SHAKING SOBBING WAUAHEGHRGRHRRHRHRH

Machiavellianism has also been located within the interpersonal circumplex, which consists of the two independent dimensions of agency and communion. Agency refers to the motivation to succeed and to individuate the self, whereas communion refers to the motivation to merge with others and to support group interests. Machiavellianism lies in the quadrant of the circumplex defined by high agency and low communion.

DAS WHAT I FEELE.......he is leading the group but he's not really IN THE GROUP...YEAH??????

When it comes to manipulation, individuals high in Machiavellianism may, according to Bereczkei, “have certain cognitive and social skills that enable them to properly adapt to the challenges of environmental circumstances”. They also are incredibly perceptive to the presence of others, and feign altruism to enhance their reputation.

I am so dead guize 😭

High Machs are more than likely to choose better quality friends, as they can guess better who is a good person and thus more pliable for manipulation.

bruHUUHHDJFKFKFLG 😭😭😭

Workplace behaviors associated with this concept include flattery, deceit, coercion, and the abuse of others through one’s position of leadership.

Really seein this....

Yo this is such good food.....also scary as hell....but thats what makes it michelin star level 🙈 THANK U FOR FOOD FOR BRAINROT I AM TOSSING THIS AROUND IN MY SKULL

[devondespresso]

WIP WhhhMonday Nightish

Once upon a time Devon was tagged in a wip wednesday by @eriquin and meant to do it but missed both wednesday and the weekend before remembering again. totally unrelated, Devon is working on getting their official adhd diagnosis.

i also noticed that the past snippets shared in wip-whatever posts have been purposefully the least interesting parts because i was worried about spoilers, which is dumb because that's created the unintended consequence of my tag is full of everything i don't like as much and a very different impression of what my fic is (as seen by most of these snippets being my rewritten scenes despite the actual fic being mostly new in-between scenes)

TLDR: WIP Whatever-day-it-is: But Actually For Fun This Time

The Rules

Post the file names of up to 5 of your WIPs for people to send you asks

Post a snippet of one of those WIPs

When people send you an ask with the name of one of your WIPs, write 3 lines of that WIP.

(Optional) Post the lines you wrote.

You can send multiple requests especially since this is going on through the weekend!

The WIPs

we're doing bulleted chapter titles to share from since that was my favorite and genuinely most productive format I've used. Feel free to ask for as many as you want, I plan on working on this basically all week

Karen Wheeler POV Bonus Chapter (Prologue kinda? side story in the same universe?? Bonus chapter set after season 1 and way before ch 1)

Steve, are you okay? Are you okay, Steve? (ch 9)

What's this? The consequences of my actions? (Is that a motherfucking Lovejoy reference?) (ch 10)

Kidnapping? no. surprise adoption. (lol get taken care of BITCH) (ch 11)

NEXT CHAPTER BC IDK HOW TO TRANSITION (ch 12) (a very tentative title for the next chapter to be written)

The Snippet

here is my favorite and most recent scene I've written, which takes place before they junkyard where Steve and Dustin are at the grocery store to get that ungodly amount of raw meat they have to toss around (also i've split chapters up a bit in the name of structure so the third chapter is now called "Mommy Issues Central". Lemme know any goofy vine reference ideas you guys have or if it should stay like that) (fear not, Get Yo Fucking Dog Bitch lives on still as chapter 4)

___

They turned down the next aisle, lining the edges of the cart with some other pasta-related shit that he could still probably use. They heard someone coming over from the next aisle and before he could turn the cart around Mrs Wheeler pulled up.

"Oh, Steve ...and Dustin. What're you boys up to?"

He took a short breath to work their story into something without Mike, but Dustin beat him to it.

"He's teaching me stuff." 

He was imitating the tone Steve used but still way too vague. Mrs Wheeler held up a smile, her brows slightly lifted.

"Y'know, like cooking-" Steve said, throwing in a little gesture to the cart.

"And cars, changing oil and things. Y'know just.. dad stuff."

Dustin's part convinced her, Mrs Wheeler's expression softening into a real smile.

"Well I won't keep you long," 

She nodded off to the side to talk to Steve one-on-one.

Great.

“Are you and Nancy okay?”

“Wh- we’re- Why? Did she say something?”

“No, no, she’s just been… closed off, lately. And I drove her to school the other day, she didn’t say why.”

“Sh- yeah, that- that’s on me. Sorry.”

“Did you break up?”

“No no, definitely not. We’re kinda… we’re working on it. I’m going to try and make it better, after y’know..” he gestured to Dustin behind him.

“Right.” she smiled again, “Let Nancy know she can talk to me about any of this? Please? I tell her but- I don't know, maybe it’d be different coming from you.”

He held up a smile for her.

“Yeah, sure. Mind if we..” he jutted a thumb towards the end of the aisle.

“Yes, go ahead.”

He gave her a short wave and turned back to Dustin, who studied random shit in the aisle like Steve would believe his sudden fascination with olive oil outweighed childish curiosity.

“Steve-”

He turned back around, seeing Mrs Wheeler coming back up to him and whispering again.

“I know I’m not your mother, but you can talk to me, too. Both of you, okay?”

He kept the smile in place and nodded again, and she finally went back to her cart.

Dustin “Definitely-Not-Eavesdropping” Henderson followed him out of the aisle, thankfully waiting until they were out of earshot to ask.

“What's going on with you and Nancy?”

“Thought we had ‘much bigger problems than my love life’?”

He pulled up to the deli, stopping to pretend to look at the options.

“We’re not dropping everything for it but we can still talk.” he groaned.

“I’ll tell you later, kay? Not exactly the best place to talk.''

___

Tags

@stobinesque @spoookysix @marvel-ous-m @alexcharmsyou @museumgiftshoperaser @blushweddinggowns @sharpbutsoft @fag4dykestobin @findafight (no pressure ofc and feel free to switch it to actually wednesday fhuhjdklashj) (also just let me know if you don't wanna be tagged in these)

[original-character-championship]

Bracket H Round 1

Poll 24

Skitt & Ena & Olive (@bootsieboots) vs. Apricity Nix (@decapod-appreciator)

495. Skitt & Ena & Olive (@bootsieboots)

skitt usez any, ena usez they/it/she (bc of her eczema), and olive usez he/they

The TL;DR 4 them is that theyre little fucked up guys living in a circus 2gether. Skitt is a repressed traumatized clown amphibian, Olive is a sweet jackalope who acts like an asshole as a defense mechanism, and Ena is a chaotic little shithead w a short fuse, whos actually secretly the mom friend. I like to put them in2 situations in my head and then never write said situations down. Also theyre all aspec and trans.

Skitt:

he is simply a little guy! (puts him thru the horrors puts him thru the horrors p) Oh, hes a bit fucked up actually.

-a mishmash of basically any amphibian features i think r cool! It is also a clown! Isnt that silly? Well its actually 4 trauma reasons. Lol. lmao.

-has rejection sensitive dysphoria and wants every1 2 love him so much all the time. Cries and throws up when it inevitably doesnt work out.

-ADHD!

-super in2 fashion and makeup. Can u guess why? Trauma reasons, of course! Honestly most of her hobbies r rooted in wanting 2 escape something.

-i cant think of anything else non-spoilery 2 put here. Uhm. ze really likes bubble baths and swimming.

Olive:

A little skrunkly autismic sourpuss. He wishes that he cud b more sincere w people sometimes, but every past attempt has been met w people shutting them down, in 1 way or another. The only person in the world he feels even mildly comfortable around is Ena (and later on in the story, Skitt).

-acts like an asshole around most people bc theyre used 2 being seen as one. And by asshole, i mean a little quiet, sulking, wet cat in a corner of the room who makes angy faces at any1 who invades their space.

-mute! This is bc bunnies do not have vocal chords. Communicates thru sign language and annoyed noises. Screams when overstimulated. Yes, bunnies can scream, just not using vocal chords. There r also other sounds they can make! (mostly annoyed sounds. He does purr as well! Just like a real bunny)

-very in2 music. Plays the harmonica and other woodwind instruments that r easy 2 steal. Can they play good? Uhm. havent decided yet actually.

-has a sort of heart shaped facial scar and a broken antler he got from entirely mundane causes (antler is permanently broke, dont question how that works bc i dunno).

-very incredibly touch averse, only tolerates Ena’s touch. theyre also fat and very fluffy! Great 4 cuddling! But he wont let u. Sorry.

Ena:

Money gremlin!!! Chaotic anarchist motherfucker!!! Probably owes u money! Is currently being gay doing crime. In this world, 1 does not have to pay/steal 2 survive, but Ena does it anyways 2 fuck shit up and stir the pot.

-escaped from a shitty orphanage w Olive.

-horrible anger issues. If Olive is a sourpuss, Ena is a bomb waiting 4 an excuse 2 go off. This is bc in the orphanage, they learned that no 1 wud listen 2 them unless they scratched and fought and clawed and bit and punched. (and shocked!). Shes generally chill tho, just, its easy 2 get on her bad side.

-sorta the therapist friend, bc its good at telling ppl what they want 2 hear. Her charismatic attitude also helps when scamming people.

-uses prosthetics! In this world, aquatic animals r given the ability 2 stay on land 4 extended periods of time via prosthetics! Want 2 know more? Ask me :>

-basically blind. Electric eels have awful eyesight, and shes no exception! She can only see bright lights and colors. They use electrolocation 2 get around. (please ask me what it is if u dont know, i am v happy 2 infodump abt anything oc related!)

Remember kids, a vote 4 my ocs is a vote 4 disability, queerness, anarchy, the found family trope, little guys being put in situations therye entirely unequipped for, furries, and much more!

Skitt has a triangular dress with purple and yellow split colors, and purple leggings. Pointy, slender legs. A long pointed yellow hat with a little green thingy on top (idk what to call it). Blue eyes with froglike pupils. Minty-green, short, curly hair. A classic clown makeup look (off-white facepaint, a clown nose, and pennywise-esque makeup lines going from the bottom of his eyebrows to the sides of his mouth.

Olive is a jackalope with short, olive/forest green hair swooping over one eye. His eyes are the same color as his hair. Most of their fur is darkish brown, while his belly, his inner thighs, and lower left arm is beige. their right arm, lower legs, and the top of their ears are black. Only wearing black arm warmers thanks to sensory issues.

Ena is a vaguely pirate-themed girlie. Dark brown skinned, with grey arms and greyish legs. Big thicc tail. Mostly black hair. Tattered black shorts and an even more tattered, dark green crop top. Has red eyes and a red sash tied around its waist. Lots of little spots all over their skin. lazy-eyed.

496. Apricity Nix (@decapod-appreciator)

she/her

she's a werewolf she's aroace she stalks people on accident. she didn't know what a crime was until the police went after her. her best friends are a supervillan and a failed actress. she thinks she would make a good detective (she wouldn't). she's fun and friendly and sweet but still a fully thought out character. she runs away from her abusive home to find her sister and in the process finds a whole new family. she even takes down the government.

Pris is a short, pale girl with  black hair styled to look like wolf ears. she has brown eyes with diagonal red pupils and a bit of a snaggle tooth on one side.

[thekawaiibutterflygirl]

I can't believe I had to hear stupid criticism of these things in review videos of season 3, but I'm out here willing to defend my homies to the death and giving my own two cents on things

I'm somewhat okay with Sarcastic Chorus, but his criticism of the "hero doubting themself trope" pissed me off so goddamn much. I know it's not specifically canon that Luz is ADHD, but I literally relate in every way with her symptoms. That includes something that's known as Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD). It's not Luz doubting herself in terms of normal sort of doubt, it's not that she believes she can't do it or deal with things, or doesn't think she's strong enough. She is deathly afraid of her friends abandoning her because of something outside of her control. Just because of a little mistake, she thinks the whole world is going to fall apart because of her. And this extreme reaction to something outside of her control is a pretty common reaction in those with ADHD and to those who experience RSD. She wants to punish and she actively blames herself for things like that because of the way she's been judged so harshly due to being different. This self criticism comes from other people blaming us as children, from calling us lazy to punishing us for causing trouble because we weren't accommodated properly. It is so normal for children with ADHD to grow up being traumatized by the world. This is shown both in her mother, Camila and somewhat within Eda. Camila shows symptoms of inattentive ADHD, while Eda shows symptoms of hyperactive ADHD. And they both have trauma. So they definitely have different ways of reacting to that trauma, Camila being protective and Eda repressing a lot of the things that make her different. Luz's experience is so real and common, and people ignoring that and writing it off as a trope, boils my damn blood. Maybe don't act like it isn't realistic, just because you don't experience it.

The other thing is that it is SO WEIRD people hate Willow?? Like man, I didn't think she was a boring character at all. I guess y'all just don't understand feeling insecure and learning to glow up and be more confident. Willow is far from my favourite character, but people doing her fucking dirty in the review videos. Willow has had a character arc of being a doormat to being a badass plant witch. And that comes with being the therapist friend and repressing all that shit inside. Having to deal with everyone else's bullshit and being the sensitive person she is, she wants to help. And she couldn't accept people back into her life because of the way she was mistreated. She was tired of letting people walk all over her, and was super cool for eventually getting boundaries. Willow's character arc is small in comparison to others, but she deserves more credit for being a damn cool and relatable character. I can't believe people called her boring, just because she's a side character. I like her a lot, and there's nothing that any of you motherfucking reviewers can do to change my mind. Willow doesn't deserve the criticism, she's a well-rounded and complex character, actually.

I can't really remember much else, just more so how it's weird people have viewed things in their reviews. I'm definitely confused. Like,, it feels like people are upset because some things just weren't written for them or they just made a weird reach for something.

Anyway, I'm glad most people like this show regardless. Reblog if you agree or wanna add your own thoughts!!!!!

[the-one-who-lambs]

SIT DOWN it’s STORY TIME.

Y'all would not fucking BELIEVE the counseling appointment I just had. I PROMISE it’s related to Cult of the Lamb. Just sit tight.

TL;DR: I have been questioning whether I am autistic for YEARS. What helped actually set a potential diagnosis for me in action? It was motherfucking Cult of the Lamb.

Context: I recently moved, transferred health systems, and needed to refill my adhd medication (vyvanse, which is a controlled substance) so since my new health system has different diagnostic requirements for ADHD I had to go in for a psych eval to basically confirm that yes I still have adhd. Which all worked out, btw, I have access to my medication again.

BUT.

When I thought the appointment was nearing a close, she brought up the fact that I had self-identified as "neurodivergent" and last time she had asked me to explain what it meant to me. I explained that it encompassed many different ways of thinking and different brain chemistries/structures, including but not limited to ADHD, autism, PTSD, cerebral palsy etc. She then asked if I could potentially relate to any more of these identities and nudged me towards autism. Which was so validating because I've been wondering for years but like. For a therapist to just come out and lay it right in front of me was... unexpected. So that day I told her yes, I related to many autistic traits but that I also knew that there was a lot of overlap of symptoms between autism and ADHD and that non-autistic people could have autistic traits as well. I was deflecting wanting to deal with this and apparently it was obvious because she brought it back up again today.

There was a part of me dreading this appointment because I knew there was a chance she'd bring this up and then I would have to deal with it and it would feel real. So when she asked about it again and pointed out, hey your psych results and history questionnaire from your parents and past diagnoses and etc all line up with this and i just start tearing up because I don't know what else to do

And we had a long conversation about it and kinda unpacked my internalized ableism about this and pointed out some things in my history/questionnaire/eval that had led her to pose the question about pursuing a potential second evaluation for autism. So I accepted, because I had been procrastinating it for a while (due to fear of finding out that I was right I guess? but also really wanting to know and knowing in my heart that I know myself best and I was probably right?). If not now, when. So I have a follow-up appointment for an autism evaluation on October 24. Whatever the outcome I'm just proud I did this today.

Here's the fucking kicker that I think y'all are gonna appreciate.

So many of y'all know I write Narinder as autistic and boy howdy have I been projecting onto him so hard. When doing research for writing Requiem I realized how many of these traits I was checking off for myself. I published it like 2 days before the appointment. I have a LOT of trouble describing myself. My personality, my symptoms when asked about them, etc etc. But because I had done so much reading I had an idea fresh in my mind about what my autistic traits were because I had written them out and compared them to what I was writing. So I was able to articulate the things my counselor was asking me about so well and I felt like I had the most productive appointment I've had in ages. Looking back, I realized a lot of the things she asked me were autism-related rather than ADHD related. (For example, she asked me about any special interests I might have. Literally infodumped about the history of ALL my hyperfixations for ten minutes, then infodumped about my current hyperfixation cult of the lamb and my special interest (creative writing) and how I've been combining these two things and projecting onto blorbo from my video games and shit.) And all this really helped her in my evaluation and led her to propose the further evaluation for autism in the first place.

Also kinda screaming at the fact that I might have to send my therapist my fanfics so she can use them as a diagnostic tool.

Well. Back to writing.

[deyadee]

Do You Have Kids?

I just thought of this from the other day, so maybe I should’ve just put this on the other post but fuck it.

I like to have fun with the kids at bat are in line when I’m working. Even if I don’t want kids, it’s nice to give them a sucker or see them smile because I feel like I relate to them more than people my age. Especially with all the borderline model looking girls with their gaggle of friends like it’s a fucking 2010s pop music video. So anyway, I do my usual joke shit with the kid and this older woman in line behind him smiles and says “You’re so good with children, do you have kids of your own?”

I know she had good intentions, and it was meant to be a compliment but it fucking stung like she came up and called me a fat fucking pig. Any time I’m a little happy I gotta get fucking shot down like- alright well I can’t come up with anything that wouldn’t be a shitstorm and a half from Twitter so I’ll just let you fill in the blanks. Thanks for fucking reminding me that no matter how good I treat people, no matter how much good I try to put into the world or at least try to cheer myself up during work that I will always always be fucking ugly and look older than I am. I already feel disconnected from my generation as it is, how fun does it fucking feel also that no one can tell you’re 20? And yes I know some people have kids early but FUCKING 20?!

My fucking combination of having dark circles under my eyes, pale skin, deep voice and y’know being a fatass makes me seem like I’m older. I already know I’m ugly, but knowing that anyone around my age doesn’t see me as an equal fucking hurts.

Any dating site, any fucking person who I could connect with instantly sees me as an adult. I know, 20 is an adult, but I feel like I’m already missing out on something other people aren’t yet…

There’s never any fucking benefit of looking older for me. Fuck alcohol. Fuck cigarettes. Fuck any of that fucking bullshit. There’s not a goddamn motherfucking cocksucking thing on this goddamn earth that is positive for me that comes with being fucking ugly and looking old. I thought maybe it’s just because I’m always with my sisters and a mom and daughter are more common to see than two sisters- but fucking no. No goddamn fucking fucks goddamn motherfucking shit doubts about this fucking thing! I’M FUCKING UGLY. Nowadays, you think someone my age would see the ugly fucking hog with high maintenance and choose them over literally goddamn anyone else?! GOD I FUCKING WANT TO DRILL A FUCKING HOLE IN MY GODDAMN MY FUCKING SKULL THERE’S NO FUCKING REASON IN LIVING IF YOURE GOING TO SUFFER EVERH FUCKING DAY TO THE BITTER END IF YOURE FUCKING UGLY JUST FUCKING KILL YOURSELF BECAUSE LIFE DOESNT GET FUCKING BETTER. GOD FUCKING HATE YOU. OF COURSE YOUR FUCKING MOM TOOK A SJOT LOAD OF TYLENOL FURING HER FUCKING PREGANNCY YOU FAT GODDAMN RETAR I CANT FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE

Ooh did I forget to mention? My mom took only and I mean only Tylenol during pregnancy. So I guess all those fucking bitches in Culinary were fucking right. Fucking ADHD and possible Autism! FUCKING AMAZING FUCKING GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING AMAZING

[ouma-kichi]

Hi, I just found this and I’m excited to request something! You seem like a cool dude. Anyways could you write an kokichi x reader? It could be about whatever you want, I don’t care. Thanks!

hi anon i am in love with you now hehe ! so since this is my first post like ever i’ll just do some gen dating hcs if thats cool wit u kiss kiss

Kokichi Ouma x Reader General Dating Headcanons

Info/Warnings: no warnings!! just kokichi being kokichi, reader is gender nonspecific but i do use they like once !! also i curse A LOT

THIS MOTHERFUCKER is so fucking annoying like he’s a little bitch (he got that attention deficit hyperactive disorder type beat)

all he does is tease you and make fun of you and prank you.. any time you wanna kiss him or cuddle with him he ALWAYS is a bitch about it

“neeheehee! you wanna kiss me? youre gonna have to catch me first” and then he just fuckin books it he’s OUT OF THERE

even when you catch him and you lean in for a lil kiss and your lips are JUST ABOUT TO TOUCH !! he jumps up and RUNS AWAY, yelling “ya gotta be quicker than that!” man you gotta start training or sumn so you can run faster

but wowowow if HE’S the one who wants kisses and cuddles.. he will not shut up about it like the little babie he is

if you’re busy doing work or something he will lay on the ground in front of you and just fuckin wail

“YOU DONT LOVE ME ANYMORE IF YOU LOVED ME YOU WOULD KISS ME RIGHT NOW WHY DONT YOU LOVE ME YOURE SO MEAN YOU HATE ME”

but its all good bc if you drop everything and give him what he wants you get to be soft together awwwww so cute

he likes to grab your lil face and squish it and pepper kisses all over your facey face

also he just bites you. just completely unprompted out of nowhere he just goes CHOMP ! bc his feelings are BIG OKAY but he doesn’t know how to show that shit so he just nom nom nom nom

also also also he likes to talk about you like constantly to EVERYONE

he always makes fun of everyone because HE’S the one who got you hehe yall he won he did it “man you’re fuckin lonely huh? can’t relate lol”

he just. really really really really likes you okay but he is a little adhd brained idiot so he shows you that he likes you in HIS way

i like to think that he does that adhd thing where he just attaches onto random objects, so he sees like a pretty rock or something and goes “. okay they would like this probably” so you get lots and lots of little gifts like that

he loves to give you little garbage and shit like sea glass or tiny toys, he has a whole collection and now you can have one too !!!!

he can be annoying asf but whenever he gives you something and says “this rock is sparkly it made me think of you i found it on the sidewalk outside” you just realize like.. man this fool really likes me...

and you really like him too

[g00ngala]

binged the first two seasons of ducktales 2017. i see why everyone likes this show.

thoughts (and spoilers for seasons 1 and 2) incoming:

hooohhhh boy it is a ride

it's equal parts mystery, action adventure, comedy and heartfelt which is RIGHT up my alley

also i heard that PENNY IS A LESBIAN?? UHM?? HELL FUCKING YES??

as a lesbian i approve

also... idk if this is a ship but... roomies, huh ;)

*cue "and they were roommates" joke*

oh and who gave the kids the right to be so relatable.

firstly WEBBY omg adhd icon

actually dewey is also an adhd icon. that's why they're a great team.

tbh they all have mommy issues but dewey has Mommy IssuesTM

love the parallels between their characters tho

actually all the family parallels are great, like you can see elements of the adults in the kids but none of them are exact bc they're unique (perfect for a swap au actually..)

anyway dewey's whole thing of needing attention and to prove himself is super interesting too

huey's thing of "If One Thing Goes Not According To Plan I Will Break Down" is a massive perfectionism/anxiety disorder mood and i relate

and louie's two modes being Lie and Cheat or Panic and Cry are ALSO very relatable.

he fucks shit up bc he's selfish very often but he's so charming. problematic fave (/j)

louie is interesting tho bc he clearly has some of the insecurity like dewey and some of the anxiety and need to be in control like huey. double package, congrats kid!

oh and LENA. her entire arc with breaking from her abusive aunt/creator was soo well done, best dealing of trauma in child/teen characters on screen since steven universe future imo

oughghh donald and della. Many Feelings About Them

(S2 finale spoilers) AND WHEN THEY WERE FIGHTING ON THE SPACESHIP AND SCROOGE WAS LIKE "I REALLY MISSED THIS"

🥺🥺😭😭💖💖 WHEN I TELL YOU I CRIED

della's whole moon arc was soo good and the finale was great

della is super funny and badass too i love her. also shes very pretty. am i a furry for being into della duck? don't answer that

also donald as a character needs to be paid attention to. like. motherfucker lost his sister in space, decided to take care of her three infant (well they were eggs u know what I mean) children, RAISED THEM AS ESSENTIALLY A SINGLE FATHER, FLAT BROKE WHILE SCROOGE PAID NO CHILD SUPPORT EVEN THO HE'S LITERALLY THE RICHEST DUCK IN THE WORLD (I like scrooge but tf man), and he loved them so much he wrecked the shit of multiple bad guys, including the space dictator, survived a spaceship landing that they said NO MORTAL COULD SURVIVE, stayed on a DESERTED ISLAND AND SURVIVED, etc.

idk. king shit. i am the president of the donald duck fan club.

launchpad is quintessential himbo

and finally, beakley also the only one in the show who counts as a responsible adult is beakly. queen of babysitting idiots

honorable mentions: gyro, fenton and dw. those 3 are my fave side characters they're so funny

[studying-with-adult-adhd]

adhd ask!! 5, 6 and 12 :D

5 . do I like background music or does it distract you

Heh. I used to be able to read and listen to music at the same time. Fun story. People would get upset with me. Anyways, now, it depends on the situation. I find when I want to focus on something, I watch harry potter or listen to the soundtrack. I know everything that's going on and I don't have to focus on it. I also do this with World of Warcraft music and Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit.

6. does noise when you work put you on the fritz/sensory overload? (people talking/humming/singing, a video playing, tapping, pen clicks, etc.)

So fun story. I was writing my English Diploma exam. I had specifically asked to be put in a seperate room because of anxiety and I like to talk to myself when writing essays and shit. They told me they couldn't do that. So I was sat in a room full of teenagers (so scary enough) but then I was sat next to the printer. You have to print the essays to staple them to the diploma book. It kept going off. I couldn't think.

THEN this kid. And I was 21. So KID. Brings in a motherfucking BAG of CHIPS. Like okay, snacks are one thing. I brought snacks. But snacks that didn't require my hand reaching into a fucking loud crinkly bag.

Sooooo I had a panic attack because I was overstimulated. Couldn't finish the diploma. The lady who was in charge of the accomodations at this specific location came into the room that I had my panic attack in and went "so I guess you really needed that seperate space, huh".

So again, it depends on what I'm doing too. With the General and Social Anxiety but the off-brand PTSD (Trauma and Stressor Related Disorder), I get overstimulated a lot. Sometimes that might look like me just putting in my earbuds and listening to music. It could look like me having a massive panic attack. It could look like me having massive fits of rage. It sucks. Guess I also answered #7. Woops.

12. do you take meds? how do they help you? what side effects have you had, or what meds have been wrong for you?

I do take meds. I take Vyvanse 60mg once a day. Vyvanse is a stimulant. They help me by allowing me to get my ass up every day. Before meds, I had no executive functioning. I couldn't make myself do the thing. It was like physically impossible. And I was TIRED all the time. They allow me to focus and control my emotions more.

As for side effects. Dry mouth. It sucks. Massively. I also have high blood pressure (I'm fat with a shit diet and family history), so it does mess with that a little bit too. I was on blood pressure medication for a bit but I have lost weight and it's not as high anymore. So I'm okay. Another side effect is the appetite suppression. There are days I don't feel hungry at all. So I eat right after I take my meds (if I'm in the mood) and then I usually snack on something during the day (usually unhealthy shit) and then I eat dinner with my boyfriend once he gets home and I actually get my ass up to cook.

The other side effect is the crash. The comedown. My mood drastically changes for about an hour. I go from happy to upset and easily irratible. I get sleepy and bitchy.i feel terrible and I'm currently working on overcoming some of that and some coping mechanisms.

I haven't been on other ADHD meds. I have however been prescribed many different anti-depressants that never worked. Last one was Zoloft. I was on just over 100mg. PLEASE NEVER EVER QUIT YOUR MEDS SUDDENLY UNLESS TOLD TO DO SO BY A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. The withdrawal was so bad. I felt like death. I had terrible mood swings. Etc.

Thank you for sending this in nonny!

[macamonium]

Circuit Breaker - fic summary

actively projecting my ADHD-related anger onto Denki, but I’m sure he can take it. I’m malcmalc on ao3!

Circuit Breaker, a “Denki snaps” fic

It’s finals week and Denki Kaminari finally reaches his limit. He won’t get written off anymore - not by the school, not by his friends. The power goes out across campus.

Denki Kaminari is a soft shoulder to lean on. He's a joke to lighten the mood, and he’s a reassuring grin.

When any of his bros come to him in confidence, he’ll always make the problem feel a little bit smaller, a little more manageable. Being that guy is kind of what makes him, him. 

And the new dorm system at UA is great in terms of bro to bro communication.

The common room tables in Height's Alliance soon become a sacred place for him, and there are times when he looks around from his seat - at the smiling face of Kirishima, at the mid-chew indifference of Bakugou - and starts to tear up. Things are good, and he’s the happiest he’s ever been.

Then Sero slaps a newer, thicker, paperback textbook onto the table. Just for studying. That English final is gonna kick my ass if I don't bone up.

Mina chirps up, Bakugou asks where he got it, and Kirishima does the little thing with his eyebrows that means he's listening really intently. Oh shit. Denki should listen really intently. He drags his attention onto Sero but now Sero’s laughing and taking his seat and he's done talking. The rest of them flip open their math books to the page Cementoss assigned them and Denki is left staring absently into the table. His eyes flick to the closed cover of his book. Essential Precalculus. Shit.

Finals are coming up, aren’t they?

Soon, the dorms turn cold and his bros get distant. The faces around him become serious and concentrated; the replies clipped and curt.

Admittedly, Denki doesn’t do serious very well. And he certainly doesn’t do concentrated, at least not the right way. His friends knew that part by now, after a term of day-before cram sessions and gentle, consistent reminders for him to focus on the page in front of him. They'd been nice, but finals will tighten the priorities of any good student.

Sorry, Denki! I'm studying with Jirou later. Closed session.

Bro, you haven't started on the essay? You’ve gotta get that done.

He knows this. He knows this. He knows they know this. So why do they have to be so short about it?

The sea of assignments fills higher and higher, and alone in his bedroom at night, Denki drowns. A familiar panic sets in, but he’s determined to control it. He won’t let it seep out, won’t let it affect his bros, won’t - 

Sparky, for once in your life can you pretty please shut the fuck up and focus on your own shit.

...

Focus, motherfucker? 

Zzzt. 

Say that again, pretty fucking please.

[zombie-gutz]

Will Brikin, for the meme cause why not X"D

send me a character and i’ll list:

favorite thing about them: There's not much to go on with canon besides "hhhgh angy mad scientist who decided to fuck himself over" but you can honestly do so much with him pre-incident or work on a lot of shit with him. Like you don't know how much this paranoid son of a bitch actually cares about his family compared to how he is when the incident comes around up until he gets shot up and he has to save himself.

least favorite thing about them: The uh... canon thing that took place between him and Sherry when he was out of his mind. There's a reason I don't have that and it already gives off some bad vibes related to my personal life.

favorite line: "Step up your game, Cartwright. Or do you want to end up like your predecessor?" - RE2make, one of the emails sent in NEST

brOTP: I... honestly don't have one despite headcanoning Will as bi oof- but then again in the au I have he is being shipped with @/cydippida's oc Lucas [sorry for the mention if this was out if nowhere!!]

OTP: Will and Annette, despite what canon says and despite them having a bad relationship during the incident [and that au I have] I think they can work it out with each other given that Annette survives and both of them regain each other's trust.

nOTP: Augh, this one here is a big one because let me tell you - in my experience with writing Will, there's been a couple of people who would either try and ship him and Leon or him and Claire. Not to mention anyone else who is literally younger than him. It personally gives me a bad taste in my mouth because of how prevalent it is.

random headcanon: I mean besides the obligatory "he survived post-incident because of the regeneration factor the G-virus has" there's the fact that I kind of see him having generalized anxiety disorder or ADHD. Not to mention the "gifted child" in a hellhole of a household. Then again that is how I characterize him since there's a little thing called projection,,,,

unpopular opinion: Ayyo y'all ever heard of dad bods @ the RE art community? Give this motherfucker one instead of making him fucking scrawny as shit.

song i associate with them: Exit Music [For A Film], by Radiohead gives off his vibes despite the meanings behind the lyrics.

favorite picture of them: please thank one of my friends for this because holy fUCK THE VIBES

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoldretired]

some p!g-drv3 theories (spoilers obvi)

First of all I think people demonize the pg versions wayyy too much because its a good way to be le sexy in like fanfictions. And i get it, villains are hot or whatever. and also hs is a horny age to be. But even the edgiest and horniest of teens aren’t like. that sexual/monstrous. its kind of insane the portrayals people are placing

maybe this could also be like me being older bc when i was early hs i was like yea its fair to place these super mature portrayals on a 18-22 year old they are like adults but young and now im that age and im like woah there pardner. might be an age/maturity thing. 

also like its normal for people to relate to and portray characters their same age in a similar fashion, but when adults write more sexual content about the dg kids i get hella fucking sus

idk where i was going with that first comment i guess its like a preface and in the end i think its important when characters especially teenage characters are morally grey not because they’re mature and dark/brooding but because they are still young and learning. fuck im older than like most of them, but im still young and learning. its good to be in turmoil and confused, especially the drv3 cast. they are more confused than anything.

which i think is a reason why people would join dr because if you are completely loss and in turmoil, it is appealing to be given a purpose in life and amazing talents/abilities. despite the morals of danganronpa, it is a simple reality to be told who you are and what to do

OK ONTO HEADCANONS (not doing all bc i dont have thoughts about all)

first of all i understand changing stories but i think, deep down, you can’t change fundamental personalities/values. so while the backstories might be different i think, in the end, a baseline is always the same

SHUICHI being a Bad Boy is like canon obviously but i dont think he’s as manipulative as people make him out to be. i think he falls in the more the bully role that like. mae borowski or tf2′s scout filled before they grew up. rough background, bad anger issues, lots of emotional turmoil, and the only way he knows how to deal with shit is by committing crimes and beating the shit out of people. and, similar to those characters, drv3 represents an older, more emotionally sober yet equally confused version of himself. the urges are still there as foreshadowed in the dialogue. i think he struggles with guilt, mostly survivors, but there is still a lasting impact of guilt of what he did in his past, even if he can’t remember.

KOKICHI is a child. a piece of shit motherfucker child but a child. I really do think he’s like one of the youngest people in the cast. he reminds me a lot of when my brother doesn’t take his adhd medicine and takes jokes way too far and does mean and cruel things because he thinks its funny and that its just a fun joke, but is hurting people. he desperately wants approval, which is why his leader role is so interesting because in the dr narrative he has the approval he craves and so he is satisfied. still, he does try to impress characters like rantaro and values his opinions a lot, even developing a brotherly relationship in the time they knew each other. this being said, its established kokichi was bullied before, but i dont think he’s like. the wimp people make him out to be. i think he’s more of like the class clown who desperately uses humor to make people like him, and ends up resorting to be the butt of most of his jokes. you don’t just develop a good sense of humor out of a brainwash, and that’s not something you can program in. i think that was a remnant of before, and he’s so good at bullying people and coming up with roasts - i just think that in p!g the roasts were about him.

KAEDE is baby but her p!g personality seriously reminds me of any ~quirky/edgy~ girl in a teen coming of age story who tries to be edgy and cool and act like she doesn’t care but deep down, she really does. if she didn’t have an empathetic personality, she wouldn’t want to end the game. i also think she has that self-identifying QuIrKy personality because its like she lives in her own narrative, practically announcing this story is about her and she is the protagonist. i know i used to self narrate like that and distinguish how i was different when i was like. 15-16. she has a tumblr. 

I really like the theory where KAITO is a make-a-wish kid who was better when he was younger but relapses later in teens. he never used his wish before, so he decides to use it now to be on danganronpa and become the hero he always wanted to be. i also think he might have joined as a way to raise awareness about adolescent healthcare. definitely the type who puts on a “heroic” character to make everyone else feel better about the fact he is literally dying of a terminal illness, and keeps that act up till the end. 

i think KOREKIYO is still a serial killer. i think honestly a reason why he mightve auditioned for danganronpa is because he is a serial killer. maybe his sister found out and he felt so much shame that’s why he auditioned. he probably mentioned why in his interview because duh, tell them im a serial killer and then only reason im coming clean is my sister found out and im ashamed, that is like a guarantee to get on the show.  i LOVE the theory that his sister is still alive, however, and has to watch her brother go insane because they wrote her into the story as the villain. because technically, she brought on this guilt, and is the reason why he auditioned - as a way to cause despair, twist it around so she’s the one to blame for his insanity. also, because its pretty accepted DR members become celebrities, kork’s sister is totally bombarded with paparazzi and is demonized in the media. she might end up writing a tell-all memoir about kork’s actual childhood and personality. quiet kid, thoughtful, interested in anthropology, she never thought he’d hurt a fly. watching her brother go insane probably destroyed her. 

I also think, timeline wise, kork is probably one of the oldest members along with rantaro. tbh i think kork actually graduated hs and went on a gap year doing the whole “hitchhike around the world to discover myself thing” which is where he began killing people. he was getting ready to go to college when his sister found out about what he did. this is when he decided to go on danganronpa instead of university. this would help explain why he knows so much about other cultures/travel/been so many places with so many memories/killed/is knowledgable on a level most other students are not. this would place him at like, 20-21, where everyone else is like 15-18.

ok so there’s two p!g RANTARO, p!g before 53 and p!p!g before 52. i’d like to establish now i think rantaro is the oldest of the characters, seeing as though he was already pretty old to begin with in 52, it takes time between television seasons, and he was in another game. so im placing him like 21-23, similar to yasuhiro in d1 being so much older than everyone else. i do think, in all iterations, rantaro was pretty much raising his sisters, though i don’t think he had twelve like the story (i think that’s an exaggeration, his sisters mean a lot to him, lets make him have a TON and then lose them all and feel GUILTY) rantaro joined the first game, partially to get money for his family and hopefully establish them as celebrities and let them have a comfy lifestyle, even if he doesn’t live...and also to finally ahve some sort of experience without his siblings tagging along. if he’s been raising his sisters all his life, he’s never had like something that’s JUST his. that’s his adventure. 52 is his ULTIMATE adventure. ahaha. mostly for money, kind of dreading it, still a tiny bit excited

ok p!g rantaro between 52 and 53 probably came back broken. he did the signings and appearances, but mostly wanted to spend time with his family and make sure they were set up. i think he knew the whole like few months between seasons he had to go on another show, but he did’t tell his sisters. his family found out when they saw a billboard with his face plastered on it hyping up the return of a fan favorite. yikes!

ok i get it a lot of people hate HIMIKO but i think she’s not nearly as similar as other “useless” characters in other games. its like, pretty clear she’s depressed, and the only thing she’s holding onto with dear life is magic. lack of hygiene, lack of personal care, constantly tired, social interaction exhausts - she has depression, but she’s not an UWU depressed character. so people find her depressive traits (which are some of the most realistic portrayals of mental health in the series) SUPER annoygin. she joined dr because she was completely lost and needed some sort of direction in her life, even if she’ll die for it. the thing is, even with direction, her mental state didn’t change because she wasn’t getting legitimate help. it’s like that one SNL skit that’s like. same sad you from before but in a new place. i also think she knows the magic is not real, because how could she not. i think she’s so adamant that it IS real, less as a way to convince others, and more of a way to convince herself. it’s like really super cruel that team danganronpa took a girl who is desperate for meaning and gave her literally a meaningless, fake talent.

i also kin himiko and find her a comfort character because i feel seen by her, replacing her useless talent of magic with mine of like shitty film making and comedy. i am seen.

related i don’t think she’s nearly as ugly as everyone says she is, i think she’s probably just depressed and takes absolutely no care of her hygiene and sleep and looks like sick and greasy all the time. same queen.

honest to god i think RYOMA’s backstory, tennis and all, is like 100% real and he’s the only one who keeps all of his memories except for the fact this is a tv show. i think he rolled up, a hot fucking mess, and the danganronpa team were like damn. we cannot improve upon this. 

[tessatechaitea]

Cerebus #17 (1980)

Oh! This is the issue where we learn that the toughest motherfuckers in Estarcion are priests!

What is the statute of limitations for stealing from nuns because have I got a story for my memoir! That's as close to an anecdote as I have for a comic book cover with a priest on it. At least I think that's a Tarimite priest and I think that was an anecdote (albeit a mysterious one!). It's been awhile since I've read Cerebus and I've certainly never seen most of these covers. You know how you can tell most Christians have never read The Bible? Because they're still Christian. I swear to fucking Christ it's the most ridiculous motherfucking thing I've ever read and I've read the later Xanth novels! I don't detect any hint of animosity or marital regret in Deni's "A Note from the Publisher." That just means I didn't find anything worth discussing since I'm inherently a 7th grade gossip. Dave Sim's Swords of Cerebus essay discusses sitcom television and how important it is to keeping everybody's minds diluted to the point of inefficacy. His major point is that it's easy to watch a four hour block of sitcoms without your brain coming up with one thought of its own. Obviously that's the lure of television. But what's not so obvious to most people is that it's not the show or the writing or the sitcom that's keeping you from having your own thoughts about them (although, granted, some aren't worth any thoughts at all). It's the block of time spent sitting and watching them one after the other. If a show offers an intelligent story line commenting on the troubles of our daily lives, the viewer has not time to process what they have just seen. They simply move on to the next show dumped into their viewing trough while whatever they just watched is dumped out the back of the brain to make room for the next character slipping on a banana peel causing Mr. Roper to smile mischievously at the camera because obviously that's what a gay person would do. This way of watching television mindlessly was probably more pertinent to the last century; now we are in full control of everything we watch and have ample time to pause a show or movie and discuss important and relevant bits rather then letting them simply disappear in the flicker of afterimages. Although, we sort of live in a binge culture now and watch entire shows in one sitting so we can move on to the next one. I miss the amount of discussion to be had during the week while waiting for the next episode of Wiseguy or Twin Peaks or Three's Company. Okay, maybe not that last one. What was there to discuss about that show other than why the fuck a landlord had any say in the roommate two women choose to share their apartment with?! If you read Dave Sim's essay, right now you'd be wondering, "How the fuck did that essay cause you to write those thoughts?!" Look, a digression isn't a digression because it's pertinent to the current narrative! Lay off me!

Oh, I guess this one isn't the one with the bad-ass priest (is that even one? Who can tell anymore? My brain is Swiss porridge); it's the one with the terrible German accents.

Cerebus left Palnu with a horse and eight bags of gold. When this issue begins, it's three weeks later and he's down to just the eight bags of gold. The horse had a minor accident which left Cerebus dragging bags of gold across a landscape turned muddy from torrential rains. To get out of the rain so that this issue doesn't devolve into multiple "Gee, what stinks?!" jokes, Cerebus purchases a hovel from some peasants for four pieces of gold. That's where he's relaxing when the big dumb German guys come knocking on his door. Cerebus learns that the Germans (or T'gitans or something. I feel like they're not really ever mentioned again. Not like the Hsifans or the Pavrovians) are about to invade Palnu which piques Cerebus' interest because Lord Julius was a huge pain in the ass and it would probably be funny to see his fall from power. Or maybe Cerebus just has ADHD. The guy on the cover I thought was a priest is some guy named Commander Krull. He's grim and large and dour and he's the kind of guy I thought of as a grown man when I was a kid. I will soon be 49 and I learned years ago that I'll never think of myself as the way I used to picture grown men. That's not a bad thing! I'm just commenting on the delusions that grow within the minds of children. When I was a child, I'm sure I subconsciously categorized every grown man in my life as "Man" or "adult male." I believe there was always a bit of fear that came along with the adults whom I though of as Men. It's probably why I loved old men so much because they were somehow broken through the other side of "Man" and were back to being child-like. If you're confused by my definitions of what I thought a Man was, I'd say it would have been people like Mr. Cunningham or James Evan Sr. or Pa Ingalls or Grizzly Adams or Sgt. Carter from Gomer Pyle or Mr. Banks from Mary Poppins. Men who didn't register as "Men" were Bert from Mary Poppins (hell, just about any character Dick Van Dyke played. He was too playful to be a Man), Jack Tripper, Gene Wilder as anybody, Roddy McDowall as anybody, Lenny & Squiggy. Maybe I was just intimidated by men with broad shoulders? It's sort of sad that one of the main qualities that made a male figure in my life "manly" was if they intimidated me. And yes, for those of you who actually think about shit I just wrote that you just read, Mr. C scared the bejesus out of me.

This is the face of a man who grew up thinking, "I have to be masculine or I am nothing!"

Just to be clear: I don't give a fucking toss about masculinity. All that nonsense about what makes a man a real man is simply philosophical wanking of the most boring kind. But that doesn't mean you aren't inordinately influenced by that shit while growing up, especially when your father left at two and all of your adult male role models were on television. I may have been intimidated by Mr. C and James Evans Sr and Pa Ingalls but thank fucking Christ for them because I knew at least three adult males cared about me for a small amount of time each week! Cerebus realizes Krull, disguised as a priest, has snuck out of the town for reinforcements. Cerebus' big plan is to not let that happen! My instincts are to call him a genius even though the plan seems pretty obvious. That's probably because Cerebus is a fictional character and I can lavish praise on him without feeling jealous and petty and upset that nobody is calling me a genius. I mean, why aren't they? Have I not criticized enough comic books to be regarded as a genius? Am I misunderstanding the definition of the word?!

Cerebus uses the priest disguise against Krull. Genius!

Like when he defeated the leader of the Eye of the Pyramid in Palnu, Cerebus uses trickery instead of force to defeat Krull. I mean, both are knocked out by a rock to the head which I suppose is force but Cerebus uses tricks to get the opportunity to smash rocks into their heads. Having defeated Krull, Cerebus and the T'gitans conquer Fluroc, putting pressure on Lord Julius to raise an army quickly (since his current army is on the Onliu border which is, I suppose, super far away and stuff). I guess next issue Lord Julius and Cerebus go to war! I can't believe I don't remember this story! I mean, I remember the Krull encounter but I'd forgotten it had anything to do with Cerebus waging war against Palnu. Another excerpt of Michael Loubert's "The Aardvarkian Age" appears this issue. It's as dry as reading an Associated Press rendition of a historical event. I'm not sure why I thought these things would be entertaining when I got to them. Cerebus is funny; why isn't the history of the world of Estarcion?! Aardvark Comment isn't interesting yet. It's still people praising this little rinky-dink comic book operation for surviving over a year. I can't wait until Dave starts pissing off fans and then arguing with them! Cerebus #17 Rating: B. This story seemed incomplete. Probably because it's just the first part! But also it seemed anti-climactic or a hodge-podge of semi-related scenes. It was like a sketch show! It had some pretty solid jokes but overall I just kind of felt like I'd have been better off spending the time eating a box of Oreos.

[polygarnstars]

part 1: 4, 12, 15, 18, and 19

If you think I’m going to have common sense and not answer all of these in a single post, I have Bad News lmao

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? Smart, mostly. “Gifted”. This very much Did Not Last lmaoooo

12. name of your favorite playlist? I literally never make playlists I’m a stupid fuck who uses their spotify premium to skip freely through all my thousands of liked songs on shuffle until I find something I want to listen to lmaooooo (Having said that: Rey and I put together a playlist for some characters we were entering a contest to win last fall which I titled Story and Song after the TAZ arc and also because we wrote Way Too Much for it and I’m Very Proud Of That)

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? Okay upon reading this I initially genuinely couldn’t remember any of the books I read in school because for the last several years of my schooling I just fuckin Sparknotes and TV Tropes-ed everything lmao... having said that, I do remember enjoying Maus! It was neat having a graphic novel assigned amongst all the “literary classics” that I couldn’t sit through a sitting of without falling asleep, and it may be the furry in me but the depiction of the characters/people as animals was Good :0c See, if all history was depicted with methods like this, I’d maybe actually be able to remember it ghfdjhgjfkdl

18. ideal weather? Depends on the day, but generally: Between like 65-80°F, not humid, not a lot of wind, and either sunny, partly cloudy, or drizzly but not outright storming. Basically decent temperatures without feeling like I’m walking through soup because of the humidity and weather that’s not completely gray and boring. Aka what Maine basically never is lmaoooo

19. sleeping position? I change positions every five minutes I swear to god (don’t take that out of context gfhdjbhvjd). Usually with at least one arm draped over a pillow that is Definitely Not Being Mentally Portrayed As A Character I Like To Supplement The Fact That I Did Not Get Enough Affection To Be A Functional Adult As A Child ghfdjknbhgfjdk

21. obsession from childhood? bold of you to assume i don’t still obsess over nintendo games (and just video games in general tbh)

23. strange habits? OKAY I COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING FOR THIS AT FIRST BUT I HAVE ONE NOW: MIDNIGHT FRIES

28. five songs to describe you? Speeding - LightsDaydreaming - ParamoreMusic - Mystery SkullsNo Lullaby - SIAMÉSLonely Dance - Set If Off+Bonus because it came up on Spotify while I was shuffling for songs for this and it’s a Mood: Pineapples Do Not Belong on a Pizza - Vargskelethor

29. best way to bond with you? I don’t know I usually just scream about ocs or video games with people and suddenly it’s been a year??? @riskreyes how has it been a year since we started talking but also how has it only been a year??? Wild bvhfdjkbhvgfjdk

30. places that you find sacred? Lmao I’ve never had anywhere like that really. Need a goddamn lock on my door :p I guess... the woods by my house? As a little kid before things got shitty my neighbor’s cousin or niece or something would go out there wandering around catching frogs and stuff in the spring or almost falling into the frozen streams during winter. When things started to go to shit in my life as a teenager I would hide out there to get away and nobody would find me. I haven’t been recently but the last time I did my friend and I walked along the train tracks and dove off into the woods by the side to avoid the amtrak coming by, it was great lmao. Uhh, other than that... I dunno, Boston and New York and New London all make me feel good to visit. Probably mostly because during those trips I don’t feel trapped in a dying land like Maine feels like bgvhfdjkhvgfjd

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? ......my entire wardrobe is my work outfit, excessive graphic tees, and jeans. So uhh... I dunno. I guess my NWTB shirts are pretty rad, I’d kick a dude’s ass wearing Nate’s merch

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? if i have to see another ad for some fuckin branch of the us military while i’m just out here trying to watch people play video games i swear to god-

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Oh boy I don’t know how weird these are but do you want a list??? I can give you a list hang on- In 4th grade we had a day of class where we all just had a party and ate chips and salsa and stuff because the pats won the super bowl and our teacher was Obsessed- In middle school my math class started working out of college textbooks, which is a bit much when you’re 11, advanced classes or no. Yet somehow none of the other students had any problems with this- Also in middle school, the school counselor really wasn’t very Good at his job so I usually just ended up playing Rock Band in his office instead of talking out any of my Many, Many Problems. I played the drums, for the record- Also in middle school, one time I straight up fell down a flight of stairs? Like, a full flight of stairs. Fuckin somersaulting down the stairs. The binder I was carrying broke open, papers went everywhere, my arm got cut open somewhere along the way and started bleeding. I get to the bottom, the other students are staring at me in horror, aforementioned counselor fuckin steps out of his office which is, of course, right at the bottom of the stairs, all concerned because what the fuck a kid just fell down the stairs, right? And so I, laying on the floor disoriented and laughing, declare, and I quote: “That was fun, let’s do it again!”- THE MOTHERFUCKING MAC AND CHEESE MUFFINS IN HIGH SCHOOL. Macaroni and cheese baked into the sweet batter of a muffin. I refused to touch the stuff but a friend of my did and it was bad enough he had to go to the trash can and fucking empty his stomach in it.- SAID FRIEND ALSO MANAGED TO GET A CARTON OF MILK THAT EXPIRED A MONTH BEFORE SCHOOL STARTED AT THE START OF ONE OF OUR YEARS IN HIGH SCHOOL and if I didn’t trust cafeteria food before that sealed the deal on me Never Trusting It Again- OH BUT SPEAKING OF CAFETERIA FOOD one time in the old school before the renovation, in like freshman year I think? I laughed so hard a piece of spicy chicken strip flew up my windpipe and got stuck in my nose and it was too big for me to snort out so I had to suck it back down and for the rest of the day all I could smell was burning- ON ANOTHER FOOD RELATED TOPIC down in the library I was on my iPad and 3DS because I had Long Since Given Up On School and some asshole dudes threw a rotting orange at me and it splattered all over the screens of both? So I picked up the remains and chucked it back at them and yelled “Do you wanna fucking NOT?” and they all ran off. The librarian heard me yell and saw me throw the orange back at them and she just didn’t give a fuck lmao- The librarians at my school were cool as shit really during one of our years we had to do x hours of volunteer work so I did some adjustments to the library catalogue for mine but the thing is I was fast enough at it that there really wasn’t enough to fill up my required hours so instead of giving me more to do they just sort of let me and my friends hang out playing Yu-Gi-Oh and called that good lmao. (For the record I only had one starter deck so I let my friend pick half of the cards and I would use the half she didn’t want. I managed to fuckin WRECK her with throwaways it was Iconicque)- OKAY ONE LAST LIBRARY STORY on the last day of finals I was hanging out in one of the smart tv rooms in the library right? My last finals weren’t for a few hours and lord knows I wasn’t gonna study, ADHD ass couldn’t do that and I’d already given up on school lmao. So I fucking... I brought my Wii U to school, hooked it up to the smart tv, and just started playing Splatoon there in the library. One of the librarians walked past to check on everyone, stopped at my room, watched me play for a minute (I noticed her and just sort of nodded and waved like ‘Sup’ so she Knew what was going on), and then just LEFT. Like, she didn’t give a fuck. Shoutout to the librarians, the Chillest- ALRIGHT LAST STORY LAST STORY I straight up never got all the credits I needed to graduate lmao. I was missing half a credit but they let me go anyway and to this day I cite the reason as being my high scores on the SAT/PSAT? I was the first student at the school in like, a decade, to have gotten an award from the National Merit Scholarship Corporation for my performance on them, and I guess they must have thought that me failing to graduate on time would look bad on them because, uh, yeah, it would, if people found out their teachers couldn’t handle a ~smart kid~ to the point that they did poorly enough to not even graduate with the rest of their class nobody would be willing to send their kids there lmao. And that’s the story of how I graduated when I wasn’t technically supposed to!!!

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? That’s a good fuckin question hey shit memory what was that thing that made us laugh so hard we couldn’t breathe again?...Don’t remember? Yeah I thought so lmaoI dunno, probably a joke in some let’s play? Or... god. Now that I think about it was probably the Slicer of T’pire Weir Isles moment actually. Holy shit, that was good.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? That I’ve ever tried? Jesus, I dunno, I have issues with texture more than flavor. I Refuse to eat my mother’s stuffing because it’s literally just soggy ass bread. In terms of pure flavor alone? Her shepherds pie. It’s just... there is no flavor. It’s like eating cardboard. I’m begging you, De, use seasoning. If I ever have to eat shepherds pie that just tastes like tin from canned peas and vague hints of unseasoned beef again I’m going to go on a murderous rampage.That said? F in the chat to Cameron for that mac and cheese muffin. Rest in pieces

73. favorite weird flavor combo? GVFHDJBVDN JUST GONNA MAKE ME SHARE THE DILL PICKLE/CHOCOLATE PUDDING PACK COMBO FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE HUH

93. nicknames? Gar, Garn, Lane, Bill, Master, Pants, Shortpants. The first three are self-explanatory, first two are shortenings of my name and then my masc/surname. The latter four come from usernames of mine - Bill from Bill Ciforce (If you stack a Bill Cipher on top of two other Bill Ciphers, you get the Ciforce), Master, Pants, and Shortpants from MasterShortpants in reference to one of Link’s nicknames in Skyward Sword

95. favorite app on your phone? Does the internet app count? No? Lmao. Spotify I guess :p Need me some Tunes